#this is real guys I was the first woman
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hes the first male to ever make a woman squirt
Absolute peak male performance
Peak surgeon performance
Adonis was made in his image, actually
He is so *mwah*
#── thirst hours 𐙚⋆°.#this is real guys I was the first woman#everyone who disagree just look away#trust me w this one guys
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anime and fantasy are beautiful bc you can make blonde men attractive
#i thought this watching the first ep of dunmeshi. sorry laios. my bride laois.#i am going to read the manga... as well.. when i have time....................#sergle.txt#illustrated blonde men: ahh I see :3#those same blonde men if they were real: HEAUGH#hohenheim from fmab? don't mind if i do#if he was real? that's a guy who looks at you for too long in a gas station. he is awful#KELSIER'S ON THIN FUCKING ICE#as a dutch woman I have authority on this topic.
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rewatching the first episode of Hannibal and holy shit I forgot how good this is but it's actually insane that Brian fuller set up the ep like this, he introduces will and Hannibal by first briefly showing them at their core, at the darkest, most vile part of them---we get a glimpse behind the curtain---and then its gone, the curtain is snapped shut and we see their masks, their human suits.
Will empathizes with killers because he likes it, and he wants to kill but he refuses to give into the urge because he knows how much he'll like it and he won't be able to stop. So he lives vicariously through other killers, satisfying his own dark urge by feeding it little morsels of secondhand blood lust. Every crime scene he works gives the urge something that satisfies it, not enough for it to grow, but enough for it be sate. Enough that he can ignore it for long enough that he can walk around and be Professor Will Graham who is Weird, Brash, and Non-sociable.
And Hannibal is a cannibal at night and a psychiatrist by morning.
#hannibal#hannigram#hanniblogging#hannigram brainrot is real#also ive watched the entirety of hannibal like four times and everytime i watch it i still find stuff to lose my mind over#brian fuller the brain that you have#winston my beloved#also plzzzz the way hannibal was just gonna kill jack with like no hesitation#AND the way hannibal was fucking smitten from the moment he spoke to will#like wills all like i hate eye contract its distracting as hell and hannibal is just looking at him like 😍😍😍#plss you are embarrassing yourself#also question#when will was like how do you see me and hannibal said that shit about the mongoose and the snakes and will just looks at him like ????#do yall think he was confused because he was genuinely like dude what the actual fuck are you saying#or because he understood it#and the woman at hobbs' work being like two guys from the fbi#and neither of them are technically from the fbi#just two insane dudes having a first date by larping an active fbi investigation#omg and when will shoots hobbs he realizes that oh fuck this is my chance this is my chance to kill and finally satisfy that dark urge#so after he shoots him once he just keeps shooting shooting shooting till its impossible for hobbs to survive for hobbs to be dead#till it was will that killed him
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2024 reads / storygraph
The Sword of Kaigen
standalone fantasy set in a rural mountain village at the edge of an empire that still holds traditional values, with families of powerful water/ice magic warriors
follows a powerful young heir who begins to question his beliefs about the empire when a new boy comes to his village from the city
and his mother, a housewife who has tried to forget her youth as a warrior and vigilante in the city since she moved back home to a loveless marriage
when there’s a violent attack on their village that they’re unprepared for, everything changes, and she has to embrace her old skills to protect her family and people
#The Sword of Kaigen#aroaessidhe 2024 reads#I’ve been meaning to read this for years and I finally got around to it! a really unique fantasy novel#I had always assumed this was ur average pre-industrial high fantasy and then was immediately hit with video games/tv in the first chapter#lmao. But overall (aside from the broader worldbuilding/politics) it is closer to the average ‘historical’ fantasy narrative -#so I can see why I got that impression#Some really compelling characters and interesting narrative structure that went in some unexpected directions.#It really focuses in on one village and how devastating a single battle in a war can be to their people - and how much work the recovery is#I feel like most sff is more concerned with a single person and/or the whole war so this felt unique. did also mean that the pacing was odd#- it's a slow start; then there’s a battle that must be hundreds of pages. The last section of the book feels a little too drawn out#and brings up random hanging plot elements that don’t really go anywhere. But I think overall this works for the story.#also one thing I didn’t love - cool complex interesting female character MC sure but also there’s weird moments like:#the first scene we see her is all the housewives comparing their attractiveness; she keeps referring to herself as an old woman (when she’s#and oh so meek and useless etc. And some of this feels like it’s part of the broader portrayal of the misogynist society#but some of it felt clunky or unintentional?#And then especially the end - when she and her shitty husband finally confront each other as equals and he apologises#she basically immediately forgives him and is like oh I was equally at fault because I am a meek woman who didn’t try either#like him realising he was wrong (and her realising he had a reason for being the way he was) doesn’t negate the fact that he treated her li#she acts like it was her fault for not trying too - when we have numerous examples of him berating her if she spoke up about anything?#like im glad he’s learning. but also that doesn’t mean she needs to suddenly forgive and love him wtf#that's the only real thing that annoyed me though.#also btw that 5yo seems kinda fucked up. are you guys gonna do anything about that
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I caved and made them real. Obverse me losing more and more motivation to draw as I made each of these back to back lol
#keese draws#oc art#oc#pmd#pokemon#pokemon mystery dungeon#pmd oc#these guys are inspired by my usual pokerogue team#oh also imagine a question mark after every he/him I have the trans woman beam pointed at all of them#these are just initial concepts for the actual characters themselves now that I’ve developed the world a lil bit#but yeah these 4 were childhood friends who wanted to be in an exploration team together but had to split up for years#tart and quart both had to move away and cart ended up leaving his hometown to try and become a real adventure a few months later#cart and bart remained in contact for a few years before cart got caught up in some crime circles#he was incredibly trusting when he was younger so he got taken advantage of and ended up digging himself a deeper hole in an attempt to be#manipulative back and eventually he got scared enough that he tried to reach out to a guild and acted as a spy for them in turn for them#eventually helping to clear his name and allowing him membership#there were parts of the deal that were unfair and kind of shady but he was desperate enough to pretend he didn’t notice#after he joined he started immediately putting out listings for new team members and he fully planned on being super picky#but when two of his childhood friends applied he was over the moon about it#and immediately accepted both of them#now quart also applied because he had recently ran away from his old life and was desperate to have a new one#and he missed his old friends deeply so when he saw one of them actually managed to start building the team they all wanted to make he was#quick to apply even if he was rusty as hell on normal non contest combat#cart didn’t recognize him at first and mostly only let him have a trial run because he thought it was funny that an eevee of all things was#applying for a high level exploration team and he fully planned on telling quart off immediately afterwards#this ofc made quart very upset and angry but he didn’t try to clairify who he was because he just assumed that time had made cart into an#asshole which isn’t wrong per say but quart didn’t realize cart didn’t recognize him#it was a rough trial expedition but cart found himself actually quite impressed with quart’s slight of paw skills and his impressive biting#speed so he decided to give quart a real chance instead of a mocking one#eventually quart laughs for the first time around him and that makes cart realize who he is and that makes him feel horrible
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I'm 100 pages into Moby Dick and they just got on the goddamn boat
This book actually kinda fucks hard it's great?
#Moby Dick#Was not expecting a comedy out of this book tbh#Nor was I expecting homoeroticism#And I was NOT expecting Herman Melville to actually be cool about representing non-Christian religion in a Christian dominated society??#And there's only been one (1) woman in the book so far but she was such a cool character?#Plus there's a shocking amount of class consciousness in this??#Herman Melville Woke King??????#This book came out in 1851 and Ishmael's saying this Pacific Islander he met a couple of days ago is basically George Washington#He does keep calling him a cannibal and the guy does keep talking about doing cannibalism#So it might not hold up to modern standards for racial sensitivity in that regard#But like the man's saying that this guy wanted to give Christianity a try#Figured out that it wasn't for him so he went back to his pagan ways and literal idol worship#And Ishmael was like “Whoa based? God said to love your fellow man and this is man is as equal to me as anyone else”#Real shit here honestly#This was pre-Civil War this is amazingly ahead of its time in terms of racial justice#Also: “hell is an idea first born on an undigested apple-dumpling” is based as fuck I love this guy so much#The first chapter is a masterpiece#“This is my substitute for pistol and ball. With a philosophical flourish Cato throws himself upon his sword; I quietly take to the ship”#THAT IS SO FUCKING GOOD#I can't believe it's taken me this long to START THIS BOOK
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i know that when carlo suddenly decided that he needs to marry guy made a whole list in his head n like had a deadlines n shit. like it was some kind of a task he needed to do
#whole fkin campaign. idk still not sure how it was but man was in his peacock era for sure#n it's like i need to find a wife i need to make it in 2 (or whatever) months etc etc#but its like a bg task n he didn't speak bout it w others. like he just said that he needs to marry#also idk if i mentioned this but i wrote lauretta/carlo first meet long ago n she was w her fiance#i just listened to “pretty music” again sorry. i like that uh governor or tf this character is#changes his behaviour from one woman to another so real. n that fkin “but im a lucky guy who gets to dance w u”#and “since u know what i need i'll even take your lead” <- fr like im sure lauretta screwed him for several times#just to see if he's really serious good old manipulations w men nothing new nothing superstitious#upd. he probably made a mind budget for this (i mean finding a wife)#n bout lauretta screwing carlo its like in this ukranian song Ти ж мене пiдманула ти ж мене пiдвела#but since he's a strategist he's patient (like i wanted to accent this quality sm i wrote#that carlo started thinkin bout taking moretti's place back in 1932)#anyway. “Challenge accepted” situation and idk fr for some reason when it's carlo eddie lauretta it's always bout playing#so lauretta started playing n he entered this play too. i don't even think he was exactly mad (maybe only for the 1st time)#at this point i have a clear image of how they met n their first dates (cringe word) n how he proposed#ie how it started how it ended. ending was fast i believe (deadline is approaching 🤯)#what was in between i don't exactly know but i wondered just now if he also screwed lauretta (i think yes)#bc i don't knooowwww frrr all this is so bout playing to me#but bout ending its like. boss fight (<- sex) game credits (<- marriage) ((speedrun))#also i was thinkin if he even ever met lauretta's parents (i always thought that no but idk)#can imagine lauretta calling carlo a good friend. i also hm ok#i started to write a comic like a month ago just bout falcone polycule n it starts w#carlo who says that he finally needs to get married n lauretta's mother askin (in a pushing way) why#her n her fiance still aren't married like girl tf. she jinxed it i guess#upd. carlo/lauretta is funny in my head bc right before marriage he did fell in love lauretta didn't but guy's profitable we'll take him👍#she did only after marriage i think bc it was the time when u can finally relief bc it's over#u don't need to think bout no yes no no yes yes will it work or won't etc#woman was able to fucking chill at last. she got the money sorry i mean the man#he's not runnin away let's finally look who the fuck is even this man. why he won't shut up bout astronomy can i get a divorce <- jk#but yeah “я тобi брехала” is so lauretta right after marriage to me (“i dont even know the color of ur hair”)
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gay lawrence gordon because he is just very gay but also because no woman should have to put up with that ever
#alison went through hell nd for what#gay lawrence. sound of woman cheering worldwide#first time i ever watched saw 2004 i was like yeah that guy for sure is faggy nd i never changed my mind since#saw xi they bring lawrence back but give him another wife i would still say hes Gay capital G because noway#would be very funny on their part ill be real but you know. no one deserves the ordeal of lawrence apart from that bathroom twink or maybe#someone worse (jigsaw apprentice)#📹
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My mandated monthly hater post Look away
something i keep noticing with hcing emil sinclair as transfem when looking for or creating fanwork is that she can't just be transfem you can't only say that because his fans will get either mad or really insecure. you can't make a post about transfem hcs without someone saying Well it could go both ways he has schrodingers gender or clarifying that They see her as transmasc but this is cool I guess...you don't have to say that every time brother
#of course think what you want its how you say it and what you say it in response to#when the concept was first going around on twitter there were like 5 peope minimum who felt the need to Speak up for themselves#being like i dont see it (?) or shes trans the other way to them (ok) or if pm wanted her to be a woman shed be one🤣#and i need you to be honest be so for real this does not happen with transmasc hcs and it is noticable#the little comments and shit people will make is comparable to some brainless cis person but they somehow dont pick up on it#Whys it make you so uncomfortable dont be scared to answer#Yeah the things people say make her transfem are stupid and ridiculous and just quite silly but youd be raising eyebrows if there was#this much complaint towards your favorite tmasc headcanon#Youre woke and can say sinclair has so much gender but start shifting in your seat and sweating when hes called a girl or a lesbian#period jokes or pregnancy are on the table but dont say anythijg about estrogen please guys pleeeasse
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i just got the nicest chair ever from the street i'm so happy 🤩🤩
#dw guys i live in an old ppl neighborhood and i actually rang the doorbell (so scary) partially to make sure the chair was good to take#and partially bc i wanted to see what kinda household it was (and how clean they are) and apart from a few dog hairs (he was very cute)#it's completely spotless#i shit my pants though bc ringing the doorbell was already so scary i need like 5 mins to even bring up the courage but then i declined when#the woman offered to help me with it the first time and then it didn't fit in my car by a millimeter so i had to ring AGAIN#bc she had a huge ass car in the driveway and luckily she drove the chair to my front door 💖💖💖#but she was so nice like women support women realness right there#but ringing a second time was so embarrassing i said sorry like 294829 times and thank you another 29372948 times#anyway when i finally got the chair in my apartment i also noticed that i don't really have the space for it so 🤡#yeah#i also saw the chair on my way back from work (on my bicycle) then went to get my car and failed the get the chair in and then drove back#with the woman and the chair in her car 🤡🤡🤡#most embarrassing thing i did this week#gonna have to figure out how to solve my space problem tho#i also have to clean the chair bc the thought of getting bed bugs or smth is too scary i need it CLEAN#000
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also not necessarily related with the last post but with the og, like uhmmmm i don't like going farther than calling a man babygirl/wife bc actual truthing about someone's identity is fucking weird
but. like. since others brought it up. it is weird how you can go around calling miss asian fetishism gway a woman like nbd all based on that time he wore drag & some comments about gender that were cringe even back then. but the second you say something like that about a nonwhite guy you got the gender police on your ass like..... uhmmmm wonder why.
#like first of all. being a woman doesn't except you from misogyny. being a transwoman doesnt free you from misogyny#second. why do black/brown men have to go the extra mile to perform gnc/transness??? is it bc your idea of trans people are white bodies???#like why can i open this app at this right moment and easily find content femmecoding patrick - a guy who has never in his life presented as#anything but a cis white man. but the second it is about pete i gotta jump three hops bc somehow it's not feasible? bc misogyny???#like man. can we be for reals for once 😭#god this whole thing is so stupid but it really gets on my nerves like#ok 👍🏾 good to know that for some of you bodies of color (specially men of color) are still being politised around white perspectives#also good to know misogyny it's ok as long as you're white 👍🏾👍🏾👍🏾👍🏾
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people keep tagging my post abt carrie white with taylor swift, but I'm being so brave abt it
#right now it takes everything in me to resist the urge to have a public meltdown on tumblr.com#carrie white killed 200-400 people depending on the version#and is FICTIONAL#to exist within a narrative let alone be JUSTIFIED by it you must be FICTIONAL#okay ig i am having a public melt down on tumblr.com#but im not putting tags on this so it's just me and my besties#but please PLEASE#I BEG OF YOU#THIS IS ABOUT FICTION#LITERATURE#NOT REAL LIFE PEOPLE#AND SAY WE *DID* EXIST IN A NARRATIVE#arguably- to be justified by the narrative you must first be beaten down by the narrative#taylor is a rich white woman#guys i promise you she is okay#the narrative in carrie legitimately sets the student body and all of chamberlain as a plague of hatred#insenstivity#and indifference#carrie as the protagonist turns everything on its head#her murders were righteous in the eyes of the narrative#if you read into the subtext they were acts of divine wrath#she and taylor are not the same 😭😭#people tagging it as themselves are cool though#i respect you guys#like yesss commit atrocities
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finally beat the first kingdom in p5t the other day and it was truly flabbergasting the way marie fuckin. dissolved. and morgana was like well that shouldn't have caused a mental shutdown... but i don't know for sure! and then moved on. LIKE HUH. WHY ARE NONE OF THE THIEVES. ACKNOWLEDGING THIS. LMAO?
#bobtalk#p5tposting#p5t spoilers#i guess. for the first dungeon. lol#its like well if it was akc i'd understand but it's whiplash because over and over the thieves are normally like#well....this palace Looks bad. but we should scope out how things are in the real world before we take action! they're generally cautious#and they're stuck here so obviously that's not an option right. like they were going to fight marie eventually no matter what#but they're like *shrugs* about any potential real world consequences to girlie disappearing like that it's really...weird?#i mean. even with kamoshida they only went through with trying to steal his heart because they were desperate and willing to risk him dying#bc they didn't know for sure bc they were new to this but it was better than the alternative. etc. iirc at least.#i'm aware this is a silly spin off this is just. really funny to me? unusual? that the game is like. 'don't even worry about it <3'#like guys i think you might've just killed a woman <- i know she's going to be fine. because they wouldn't do that. but LMAO can u IMAGINE#(anyway barelyyy started the second kingdom (as in. we made it to the first battle and haven't started). are all the rulers just going to b#ppl toshiro has beef with personally. because that's really fucking funny if so. his whole GC hates his ass!)
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know i'm getting old because there are hank aaron stamps at the post office and i was so excited to buy them and i'm so excited for mr aaron to bless my future bills
#ponine keepin it real#guy working there told me i was the first woman to buy them#my great response? i love baseball *insert the nerd emoji here on my computer so i cant*
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the image of various scenes with TR crossdressing with the caption “team rocket, destroying gender roles since 1997” has done so much damage to pokemon community and even more damage to the people who haven’t watched anipoke in years and hail them the best queer rep ever from vague memories from their childhood alone
FOR REAL TBH like truly just ignoring that all of those scenes are intended to mock them.
ik its not a big deal its just a pole that i wasnt even following, but something that annoyed me specifically with the one poll was when jessie was against lillie and everyone was like "OMG VOTE JESSIE BC ITS PRIDE MONTH SO YOU HAVE TO OR YOU HATE THE GAYS!!!!!" when like... im sorry lillie has more genuine lgbt hinting than jessie does sldjfslkdfjslkd.
like sure its not the biggest thing ever but one of these characters was pouring their heart out to a girl in the rain about how important she is to her and how much she depends on her while a rainbow comes out, has an arc about breaking out of the strict roles her mother forced her into, and literally gets an RGU reference in the anime and a deeply devoted "best friend", and its not jessie. sure none of that is exactly explicit groundbreaking stuff and i personally wouldnt say youre meant to see lillie as bi, but its more than what jessie's got
#tbh tho ive been watching the earlier pokemon movies in my server and while their role is minimal obviously#i do think i havent been giving enough credit to gens 1-3 TR and kinda gen 4 TR#bc they are genuinely really funny in those first few seasons#i think im just lost in bw/xy/jn hell where they were just EXTREMELY tedious and unfunny#i think part of it is that they stop caring about their little quirks and backstories come gen 5#and never remembered it again outside of sm#(and even then james's backstory ik is sorta played for laughs? halfway? kinda?#like his abuse is sorta framed as ''HA HA hes getting beaten up by a WOMAN'')#but like james's collection is barely brought up during that era#i also have some issues with how they are in dp bc theyve got both good and bad episodes there. leaning towards bad#and im reeeeally not a fan of how they characterize jessie in comparison to the guys#but idk. genuine thing does anything actually really post abt post dp TR#besides obviously the super dedicated fans and SM (which they are good in ill completely admit to that)#theres like.... two scenes of JN going around and one of them is a bit thats unrelated to them and couldve gone to someone else#mail#d0vegum#btw LOVE the yellowfang setup. lesbian yellowfang real
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i just watched charlie's first qsmp vod and y'all weren't kidding that census thing is fucking terrifying
#qsmp#mcyt#crazwaz posted#like the whole scene where it appears just. wow.#idk what pronouns ppl have been using to refer to it im just gonna use it/its idk if thats the correct set ive just seen the one vod#idk how much sway i have given ive only seen the one perspective but god if you havent seen that any of the ppl there's povs its real good#its about 2 hours 35 minutes into his vod#just. wil charlie and quackity vibing and then jaiden running in yelling that theres 'a woman in the walls'#them all going to investigate and not hearing anything at first. talking over each other.#then charlie hears it too. and in the background you can see it slowly crouching and walking in but they dont see it#until quackity screams and then they all see it and theyre all screaming and they all realize theyve been cornered in#and they try to escape and block it in but then they realize its in creative mode and theyre freaking the fuck out#then they calm down when they realize its just trying to ask them questions#and while theyre typing in their books A CREEPER FUCKING EXPLODES BEHIND THEM#and as theyre freaking out and realizing theres like. 10 mobs behind them- including more creepers-#the census is cheerfully repeating 'yes! yes! yes!' and jumping up and down excitedly#like literally big fan of horror stuff here and that scene felt like it fit right in#very effective. loved it. like the bits with the duck being like 'you broke the one rule so you can never leave' felt very creepypasta#but the census guy felt like an actual horror short film or something. not to diss the duck or creepypasta yknow its just different flavors#the way it comes out of nowhere too is very effective. like charlie is doing his el backflippo bit when jaiden comes in#not even fully out of nowhere too! like the campier bits with the duck gives it precedence!#also yeah gay sex island charlie has already slept eith two guys and has flirted with many more#'are you.... cómo se dice en inglés.... circumcised?'#so funny tho thinking like. my number one favorite part of the vod is that scary census scene#number two is charlie singing about argentina#number three is charlie in the caves with roier mariana and fit and theyre talking about circumcision#10/10 love it. i was right tho it is fucking with my brain because im trying to learn japanese and my brain is now combining spanish with#japanese because my brain has sorted those two languages into one pile thats just 'a language i have very basic knowledge of'#so now every time i try to start a sentence in one of those languages the other one tries to creep in#i had that problem when i first started learning japanese and now it returns hasdfkjhasdkjfh
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