#this is probably the one i took the most seriously
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Note
What kind of wounds would a shotgun give to someone thats not wearing any bullet proof vest but just thick, winter jackets? Like those heavy jackets with fleece on the inside that old guys wear alot. ( I think its called a work jacket?)
I've always thought a shot gun would give some sort of blast damage and make quite a mess, but in The Day of The Jackal ep 6 it didn't seem that bad when he killed that farmer guy in Hungary lol.
So here's a fun thought to play with. A leather jacket is made from treated animal hide. In most cases, they're actually softened a bit to be more comfortable.
Shotguns are frequently used to hunt large game. Large game where their primary form of armor is their skin. Their skin which does almost nothing to stop a shotgun blast.
So, unless it's loaded with something like rocksalt, a leather jacket is not stopping a shotgun.
In answer to your original question, “what kind of wounds?” Catastrophic ones. It would be really messy.
Also, remember shotguns are still usable up to ~100 meters, at which they'll have a roughly 2m spray pattern. Getting hit by a shotgun, even at 50 meters, is going to be really bad. It's a bit like hitting someone simultaneously with a hail of small caliber rounds. Individually one piece of shot isn't likely to be lethal, but get hit with five or six of them, and that's a real problem. It's going to create a bunch of wound channels, and each wound has a chance to hit something vital, or ricochet and try again. And even at best, you're going to be losing blood from each of them simultaneously.
As for actual armor, most Level III or higher armor should stop a shotgun blast. However, shotguns are pretty good at damaging body armor. So someone wearing a ballistic vest who takes a shotgun hit, probably isn't going to be safe from the next pistol round that hits their vest anywhere near where the shot landed.
Similarly, with plate carriers, it should be fine, but there's a real risk that some of the shot chipped the plate. That's not going to cause the next shotgun blast to punch through, but it does mean that carrier now can't be trusted to stop rifle rounds.
Now, none of that are things you usually obsess over. For the most part, ballistic armor is single use anyway. If you're wearing a Kevlar vest and get shot, it's time to replace that vest. So, having your vest soak a shotgun hit isn't some kind of special tactic on your enemy's part, and is really just your vest doing its job.
Against unarmored targets, shotguns can be downright horrific.
So, using a winter parka to stop a shotgun blast is probably the result of someone who heard the, “shotguns are horrible at armor penetration,” line and took it a little bit too seriously.
There are some AP shells out there. Including slugs that market themselves as armor penetrating. I've never looked too deeply in to these. I know of their existence, but not how effective they actually are.
There's also probably some close quarters scenarios where a slug might punch right through body armor, even though, generally speaking, slugs lose energy extremely quickly, and at mid to long range, they're not going to penetrate. Ultimately, it is an 18mm bullet without a lot of powder behind it, so the drop off makes sense, but it's still a lot of mass to deal with when it's leaving the barrel. Even if your armor holds up, taking that hit is probably not going to be fun.
-Starke
This blog is supported through Patreon. Patrons get access to new posts three days early, and direct access to us through Discord. If you’re already a Patron, thank you. If you’d like to support us, please consider becoming a Patron.
149 notes
·
View notes
Text
Make A Move (Pt. 5)
footballplayer!Sukuna x fem!reader
genre: slow-burn romance, college au, fluff, angst
warnings: none so far
word: 3.1
(-> Pt. 1) (-> Pt. 2) (-> Pt. 3) (-> Pt. 4) (-> masterlist)
On sunday morning, you woke up early, even though you hadn't been sleeping much. The events of the previous day came back to you one after the other. First, you thought about the game and Sukuna's impressive skills in it.
You reflected on the motorcycle ride with him and how he drove you to the Rainbow Bridge just so you could see the city at night. That must've been one of the most thoughtful things anyone has ever done for you. You turned over on your side in your bed, smiling.
And then you remembered how you almost kissed and how he treated you completely different later at the party than when you were alone. A feeling of embarrassment washed over you again at the thought that everyone present had noticed Sukuna not wanting to kiss you. Not that you were dying to feel his soft lips, probably salty from the sweat - no, that wasn't it. Because even if that were the case, it was more the fact of how and why he rejected you that was bothering you.
But asking him was out of the question. After all, you still had enough pride left to not give him that pleasure. After all, he wasn't obliged to kiss you. You shouldn't let anything show, otherwise he might get the wrong idea. And with that mentality, you went to your first lecture on Monday.
After the lecture, you entered the cafeteria. Today they cooked vegetarian pasta again and it always tasted delicious. You grabbed a plate, had it filled up, and walked over to the where the silverware was. As you were putting down your tray, someone spoke up directly from the side.
"I got your message, by the way."
You weren't startled this time.
"Did you know that people usually greet each other before starting a conversation?" you expressed calmly and Sukuna burst out laughing. You always managed to entertain him.
"Sorry, hi princess."
"Hi." you said quietly, a gloomy feeling at the nickname. "What message?"
"Yuji told me he should wish me 'good luck' from you."
"So?"
"Well, I certainly was lucky, after all you really came. But..." he didn't finish his sentence, obviously waiting for your reaction. Was he really trying to flirt with you again? This man was difficult.
You took your tray and moved towards one of the tables. Of course Sukuna followed you and sat down on the opposite chair. You sighed.
"But what, Sukuna? What do you want?" you asked in annoyance.
"You should give me your number. I couldn't even make sure you got home safe on Saturday." he flashed his shiny white teeth at you.
"Why do you care? I went home with my friends." you said, but not snippy, more in a neutral tone.
"I know that." he simply returned and didn't seem to have anything else to say. He just looked at you.
Seriously? He doesn't mention what happened at all? Well, if he can act like nothing happened, so can you.
"I don't like being watched while eating." you said bluntly and Sukuna couldn't help but smile.
"Why, are your table manners so terrible?" he countered. You puffed.
"Aren't you hungry?" you then asked, whereupon he told you that he had already eaten.
"I saw you and with you the opportunity."
"The opportunity for what?" you then questioned.
"Asking you for your number."
"You have my address already, that should be enough."
You would not let him get any closer to you.
He chuckled and you ate the first forkful of pasta.
"So you don't want to give it to me?" he carried on.
"Obviously not."
"Okay, I'll find a way. Oh, and enjoy your meal." he winked at you. And then he stood up and left the table.
Finally you could eat in peace.
You didn't see him for the next few days, which gave you enough time to concentrate on your studies. It was thursday evening and you had to give in your assignment for neurolinguistics, the due date was today. You quickly finished explaining how the priming effect works, when suddenly Utahime entered your room with the mail in her hand.
"Oh, are you finished for today already?" you asked, referring to her job, to which she nodded.
"But look at this!" she said, astonished, and waved a letter in front of your face.
The letter was addressed to you, but had no sender. Strange.
You opened it and the content was a single sheet of paper with a few lines written on it.
"You're right, your address is enough. If you don't want to give me your number, I'll have to try this way ;)"
Your face immediately heated up, you never thought he would go out of his way like that. But what was he doing that for? What was his ulterior motive?
Utahime saw your shocked face and read the letter. Then she laughed.
"Wow, he's really trying. Have you eaten yet? Should we order something?"
And together, you ended the evening with a juicy pizza.
But on the next day, you found a note in your locker too. You opened the folded paper and it said:
"Meet me under the bleachers"
Oh God, your heart was pounding. Just what was he thinking?
You decided to meet him at the stands to ask him to stop this whole thing. Even though you were really flattered by the attention, it still hurt your ego that he apparently thought he could win you over like that. Was it working? Maybe a little, but he didn't have to know that. And you definitely wouldn't fall for it any further.
When you finally got there, there was no sign of him. You asked the few players practicing on the field about him.
"Sukuna? No, he's not here. As far as I know he has a philosophy class right now."
Philosophy? You didn't even know that was his second subject. But that explained why he was around you so often, because philosophy and linguistics were taught in the same building. But why did he send you here then? Nothing he did made sense and you were slowly getting fed up with this chaos.
You were just on your way back into the building when all of a sudden, you bumped into someone's back on accident. He turned around and to your surprise, it was the menace himself.
"Careful." he laughed lightly. But you were a bit pissed at him right now and just walked past him. He walked after you.
"Hey, where are you going?" he yelled.
"I don't feel like playing your games. Find someone else to annoy." you said without even looking at him.
He grabbed your wrist and brought you to a stop. When you tried to escape his grip, he blocked you with his arm and caged you in.
"Calm down. What's going on with you?" Sukuna exclaimed.
"No, what's going on with you? Why do you leave those notes in my locker, arrange a meeting and then don't come?"
"That's what it is about?" He chuckled. "Now do you see how complicated it is? If I had your number, you would have known when I wrote the message."
You were flabbergasted, was that really his plan behind all this? To show you the need to exchange numbers?
"Or you can just write the time next time!" you spat out.
"Next time? So you like when I leave you letters?" he smirked and upset you with his presumptuous words.
"Don't twist my words..." you pouted and looked to the side. He let you go now, you had calmed down.
"Then what do you say: We have another game next Friday. If we win, I get your number, if we lose... well, you can choose."
"Why do you want my number so badly?" you probed.
"Because I like you. You're fun to be around."
This confession knocked you off balance, but you swallowed your speechlessness. In the end, two could play that game.
"Okay, if you lose, you'll never ask me for my number again." You smiled mischievously and he followed suit, tilting your chin upwards with his big hand before responding.
"It's settled then."
You stayed at Shoko's for the weekend, since you wanted to binge-watch the new season of your series. Utahime didn't like the show and had to work anyway, so it was just the two of you tonight.
After a few episodes, however, it turned into a deep talk session. You told Shoko everything that had happened with Sukuna so far and she reprimanded you for getting into this 'pact'.
"His team will win either way, the only ones who would have a chance against them are the UOT." she explained and you thought about her words.
UOT? Of course! They say their quarterback is on par with Sukuna. They are the biggest rivals!
"Are they gonna play against each other too?" you wondered.
"I think not until the very end of the season. That's the most important game after all."
The end of the season... So in about 8 weeks. But wait a minute...
"How do you even know that?" you stared at Shoko in amazement and she looked up at the ceiling.
"A few of my high school friends are on this team. Utahime knows them too."
"What? Why am I only finding out about this now?" you shifted in your seat, grinning at her. She shrugged.
"I never thought it was important. After all, you haven't been interested in football until now."
You nodded. Then your phone rang. You took it from the coffee table and saw that it was Utahime, but before you could even pick up, she already hung up.
"Who was it?" Shoko interrupted and you told her, but you two didn't think much of it.
You thought that maybe she called you on accident, so you sent her a message asking "are you okay?" and checked her location. She was still at the hotel. A few minutes later, she finally replied and confirmed that everything was indeed alright.
"Okay she just replied, she's fine. But next time we're all together, you two have to tell me more about your mysterious old friends." You waggled your eyebrows and Shoko laughed.
"Yeah, yeah, even if there's not really much to tell."
And then you were back in the stadium, this time, on your campus. It was a home game and the people on the stands were louder than at the last game, but this time you secured yourselves better seats. You were sitting in the front row now!
At the opening, all of the players walked onto the field and turned to the audience. Sukuna waved at the big crowd, his eyes moving from left to right, and finally rested his gaze on you, a small smirk spreading on his face. And then it was kickoff. As always, Sukuna's leading skills ensured a successful first half. It was clear that the team had been a unit for a long time, as well as they complemented each other.
After the first half, there was the usual break and you used it to quickly go use the bathroom. The line was long though, of course you weren't the only one who had to go after such a long time. But luckily, it quickly emptied and after you were done, the break was almost over. While the water was tingling on your hand, you heard a few girls coming in, chattering. You recognized the cheerleaders, one of them was the blonde girl named Manami.
"So, how are things going with Sukuna now?" asked Manami's friend.
At the mention of that name, you became very wary. You felt like you were eavesdropping, but you couldn't turn off your hearing sense after all.
"I think he likes me." Manami said the words dreamily, but you couldn't listen to their conversation any longer, because if you stayed at the sink for too long, you would attract their attention. You dried your hands and then went out the door.
What was their true relationship to each other? She thinks he likes her? What is he doing for her to think that? You had a weird gut feeling on your way back and when your friends noticed, they asked if you were okay. You lied to them and, thank goodness, that feeling disappeared as soon as the second half of the game started again.
And as Shoko predicted, your team won. The others weren't bad by any means, but Sukuna isn't feared in the world of football for nothing. He once again secured a great victory and after the game ended, his teammates all ran towards him to celebrate.
They picked him up and carried him to the front of the stands while you and the others clapped for their success. Many shouted his name, others shouted for the other players, but his grinning, smug look was only on you.
His comrades let him down and the crowd slowly started to leave the stands as Sukuna continued to keep you under his spell. He stepped on a bench in front of it, leaned his elbow on the railing of the stands and pulled out a small piece of paper from his pocket. He pressed it between his fingers proudly and held it in front of his slightly tilted face, a mischievous smile on it, so that you could make out the numbers on the note.
You narrowed your eyes in an attempt to see more clearly and as the digits became visible, you recognized them as your phone number.
How did he-
You were about to ask him that, but Aoi intervened, jumping onto the bench and putting his arm over Sukuna's shoulder, happily dragging him into the locker room.
When you finally came down the stairs, you decided to wait for Sukuna outside. Your friends were talking about something you didn't pay attention to.
Then the door opened and you walked towards Sukuna expectantly, but he was stopped by Manami at that moment. You saw her putting her arm around his and how she walked to the parking lot with him. That made you abandon the whole plan and you went back home with your girls.
When you got there, you got a message from an unknown number.
unknown number: not even curious how I got your number?
That was definitely Sukuna. Your mood immediately worsened. You just couldn't figure him out. You threw your phone on the bed and made yourself something to eat. Cooking should calm you down, so you put on some music and started chopping. It took half an hour before you got the motivation to text him back.
you: aren't you out with the cheerleader right now?
You sent the message and threw your phone away from you again. Why had you been so direct? You were about to take your phone to delete the message, but Sukuna had already replied.
unknown number: oh you're curious about something else I see. u stalking me? ;)
you: no, I just saw you two together after the game. hope you had fun.
unknown number: yea sure had.
you: good for you.
Somehow the message came across as more bitter than you anticipated, and Sukuna also noticed the harsh tone.
unknown number: wait, you weren't seriously thinking I was after you, were you?
you: of course not? I was being genuine.
You were not. He typed.
unknown number: well then, that's good.
And then you left him on read. Asshole.
The whole weekend was spent trying to figure Sukuna out, but as much as you tried, his motives remained unclear to you. You even started listing different possibilities together with Shoko and Utahime, but for every idea there was something in Sukuna's behaviour that didn't add up. You set up three theories:
REASON NUMBER ONE: He really just likes you platonically. But then why did he flirt with you sometimes, why did he almost kiss you, why did he put in such an effort into getting your number?
REASON NUMBER TWO: He was just trying to get into your pants. Maybe there was something going on with this girl, Manami, and he didn't want her to find out. But then why did he never make a move on you like that? Apart from the teasing, he's never been disrespectful or dirty towards you.
And, this was the most unlikely one, but,
REASON NUMBER THREE: He had a serious interest in you. But then, why wouldn't he just be straight forward? Why was this girl all over him at all times? And why didn't he do something against it? Or was he keeping the both of you as mere options?
Whatever it was, it was getting on your nerves. And you decided you wanted to make clear to him that the both of you should either be friends or nothing.
You were just taking a few things out of your locker when there was a sudden bang next to you. You took the last book out of it and then looked at the source.
"Boo." Sukuna called out, pressing his lower arm against the locker. He was wearing a simple white sweater with the sleeves rolled up, but it was so tight that it highlighted his broad, big chest. His hand was clenched into a fist, which meant that you had a perfect view of his flexing muscles as well.
You gulped and tried not to let on how attractive that was to you, because you couldn't afford to seem weak in front of him.
"Wow I'm so scared." you commented and closed your locker.
"I bet you are, now that I've got your number." he claimed. Then you faced him.
"Where did you get it from anyway?" you wondered. You still didn't have a single clue.
He smiled wickedly again.
"Why don't you ask your friend Utahime?"
Safe to say that's not what you expected coming out of his mouth.
"You're lying." you doubted.
"Why would I do that?" he replied with a foxy grin.
You took a deep breath.
"Alright, I'm gonna ask her later. But can we stop with the constant banter, it's giving me a headache."
"Oh, why's that?" he came closer, but you pushed him away again.
"It was fun in the beginning, but it's getting annoying now. Let's just be normal friends." you proposed.
"Friends?" Sukuna raised an eyebrow gently, considering your words and quirking a small smile. "You wanna befriend me?" he seemed oddly delighted about that. You didn't know if he was poking fun at you or not.
"Yeah, isn't that what you wanted?" you inquired, dumbfounded by his reaction.
"Yeah. Yeah, of course. Alright, let's be friends then." he stared down at you, a gleam in his eyes that you couldn't make out.
Yes, it would definitely be better to be friends. That way, he wouldn't constantly irritate you with his mixed signals.
And with that, your friendship with the star player began.
RAHHH he's so confusing!!! Wdym you send me LETTERS to contact me?!?!?! And then say you're not after me? ARGHHH
What do you think his intentions are? As always, reblogs and comments are so so appreciated! I wanna hear your thoughts about it so bad! <3
taglist: @miakxn @aureliaborea @nonamevenus @silkija @sad-darksoul @joh-ahae @mysteriaqueen @rebirthbunbun @inflatabledinosaurs19
#jjk fic#sukuna#ryomen sukuna#sukuna x reader#sukuna x you#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk sukuna#jujutsu kaisen fic#jujutsu kaisen fanfic#jujutsu kaisen x you#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen au#jjk#jjk au#jjk fluff#jjk angst#jjk smut#jjk smau#sukuna fluff#sukuna angs#gojo satoru#geto suguru#toji fushiguro#nanami kento#choso kamo#gojo x reader#toji x reader#geto x reader
163 notes
·
View notes
Text
DPXDC KID DANNY FIC REC
TITLE/LI NK RATING COMPLETED-WORD-COUNT SERIES
DP FIC REC HOME POST
let me know if the links aren't working and feel free to suggest any
KID DANNY
Eldritch Toddler T 7,466 SERIES
Bruce is not prepared for when John Constantine hands over a young boy who has been de-aged. While Constantine goes off in search of the one responsible, Bruce and his family are left to care for the child. Danny is a sweet kid, he isn't fussy either! This should be fine. They quickly learn to take Constantine's warnings seriously.
I Found Him, He's Mine Now G 1,810 SERIES
Damian finds Danny alone in the park waiting for his (imaginary) dog with no parents in sight. That level of negligence is unacceptable and if he has to be this boy's guardian then so be it.
Mother Of The Storms And Her Star Child T
After an accident leaves everyone Danny has ever known dead, and clockwork injured. He brings a now younger Danny to an old friend. His old pal has the perfect place for him amongst her other wards. But Danny is scared and scarred, can the bat fam trace down the young boys origins? Leave it to the family of detectives.
Danny Finding A Family In The Shape Of A Bat NR
Clockwork sends Danny to alt dimension de-aged and injured after the reveal goes bad. Clockwork had a plan and lets Danny know so he can get set in this new world where being a hero is an actual job, and sliding Danny where he needs to be to gain an actual childhood and training. Bruce finds another blood child he didn't know about.
So You Suddenly Found Yourself The Father Of A Ghost Child.... G SERIES
Timothy Drake-Wayne would have it known that he did not get infected by Bruce's adoption problem. The kid hanging off of his coat just followed him home.
Cut Out The Middleman G 973 SERIES
Alfred adopts himself a grandchild.
(Un)Dead Beat Dad NR
Danny finally escaped his parents, and in his muddled thought process, went to see his mentor, clockwork. Clockwork, however, had no clue what to do and took Danny to his dear old friend, Gotham. Going along with this game of halfa telephone, Gotham took the now six-year-old boy to her most trustworthy knight.
It Takes A Mob NR 8,402 SERIES
Bill didn't ask for a lot from life. A roof over his head and a job to the pay the rent. He spent a lot of his adult life being the punching bag of a bunch of furries and has had every single bone in his leg removed on more than one occasion. That being said he wasn't a dumbass. He knew how to read a room and was smart enough to Know when the odds had changed. It's this reason that Bill has found himself in the possession of one tiny Meta in the city known for a strict rule against them. God, Bill should've never left the Goonion.
Gotham's Youngest Ghost NR
Somewhere in Gotham, a small child finds themself alone and lost on the streets of Crime Alley. Nearby, a liminally-challenged vigilante has no idea his life is about to be turned upside down. Again. This is all Clockwork's fault, Danny is sure of it.
My Boy, My Son G 18,210 SERIES
In desperate need of a vacation, Danny has Clockwork turn him into a five year old so that he can have the childhood he never got. Soon, five year old Danny finds himself running wild in Gotham only to be kidnapped by some weird teenager in a costume who decides that Danny is going to be his son. What's Danny to do but accept this new weird guy as his new dad and become a super cool crime fighting vigilante with his new adopted family who have no clue he's a two thousand year old ghost king?
Uncanny G
Jim Gordon sees a boy walk down Park Row. A boy that looks exactly identical to a tiny and terrified kid that he pulled into his arms and comforted after his parents died so many years ago.
Don't Leave Me In The Dark NR SERIES
What's Jason supposed to do when he comes home one night to find a crying child with only one arm, and Lazarus Pit green eyes, wiping their own blood up from his apartment floor? The answer is probably not, "Adopt them.", but, hey, he's never had the best plans and the kid looks like he weighs five pounds soaking wet. (Danny can't remember how old he is - he remembers being sixteen, but he remembers being six even clearer - just that the last thing in his head is someone rooting around his intestines and telling him he's a fascinating specimen.)
Sunshine T 2,826 SERIES
Dick finds a pair of young children outside in the cold. He takes them in as his own. Soon Jazz starts showing worrying signs.
The Son Of The Red Hood T
Clockwork intervenes in Danny's life so that he can learn all he needs to be king of the Infinite Realms, and hopefully this time he can actually be loved and cared for the way he deserves.
It's Strong, And It's Sudden, And It's Cruel Sometimes (But It Might Just Save Your Life) T 1,404 SERIES
[Attempt number-one-hundred had been successful.] When Dan woke up, his very first thought was his usual: ‘Goddamn son of a fucking bitch.’ That was when he realized that he didn’t say it out loud.
A Ghostling's Second Chance T
Due to a problem concerning ghosts, undead, and the reliving happening in lady Gotham's city, she asked for help from her dear friend Clockwork. one thing leads to the other and now team phantom must help the bats with cults, owls, talons, LoA, and... apparently being known as teen dads??? Team phantom also has to deal with being de-aged, good thing that half of them can pass as old beings who can be tracked back to the roman empire, or is the Egyptian empire older??
Alfred And The Tiny Attic Squatters G
Alfred discovers four tiny squatters hiding in the attic and spends a number of days coaxing them out while keeping Bruce and the rest of the family from imploding after they discover that Damian is not his only child. It only gets more chaotic when they discover other relations and that the children may be involved in many of the unexplained events going on around Gotham. Jazz just wants to punch Clockwork in the throat for de-aging them and dropping them in a alternate dimension where she is getting targeted by a combat furry crime boss and his bird-themed minions, several of who seemed to have developed a obsession with her that is giving her strong Vlad vibes.
The Joys Of Fatherhood T SERIES
He'd never expected this. It was a complete shock. But he was going to do this right, he was going to be the best dad ever to this precious little boy. His adorable little bird.
A Second Life G 159,219 SERIES
He wakes up with no memories. He knows things, but he doesn’t know why. Who is he? And how did he get here?
Baby Catastrophe (Literally) T
Everyone knows babies exist. Only a few know that Jason has a baby. And none of them know that said baby is a de-aged Ghost King with no survival instincts.
Imprint T
He screwed his eyes shut, held his breath, desperately wished that he was back in his safehouse, alone and blissfully unaware. But the weight in his hands remained, and when he opened his eyes, it was to the bean-shaped 'fuck you' the Lazarus Pit had kindly bestowed upon him, arms and legs folded up against his front beneath off-white muslin while tiny lips smacked softly. What the fuck. What the hell was Jason supposed to do now?
Please Don't Take My Sunshine Away T SERIES
After escaping from the GIW, Danny crash lands in Gotham. He's six years old, his entire life has burned behind him, and one of the Gotham vigilantes is running around with a stifled Core. What's a kid to do? A Jason Adopts Danny fic featuring De-aged!Danny, family feels, and Jason's Grand Master Plan going completely off the rails.
Dick Grayson V Gotham T
It's taken months, but Dick Grayson was finally able to foster Danny Smith, the kid who kept showing up to crime scenes and solving murders. But after reporters learn about Danny's existence, Dick returns to Gotham to wait out the media storm. Fortunately, Bruce is allowing him to help on this new Red Hood case. Danny's not supposed to be here. Not in this dimension, not in this kid body, not without his powers. For the last year, he's made the most of it and even developed a reputation of being a medium detective. But now, his foster dad is taking him to Gotham, where threats new and old challenge the stability he's found.
Raising Phantom T SERIES
Jasmine started working at Gotham's Public Library, while having to take care of her baby brother and going to college. Danny is frustrated at having to be in hiding as well as everything else poor in his life. Also there is something off about the man that comes in to check books out. His family included. Batfamily playing a game to figure out these two's life only for things to get serious quickly.
The Boy King And The Dark Knights T SERIES
Daniel Fenton may be dead, but he wasn’t suicidal. Unfortunately, avoiding Batman and his vigilantes get a lot harder when he’s stuck in a seven year olds body in Gotham. Clockwork so owes him for this. In which Danny Fenton fixes a broken family, grows a bit as a person, and makes another technically-dead friend. Not exactly in that order.
To Become Blue-Blooded T
Bruce Wayne was named Prince of Gotham for decades. He didn’t though about it much. The Wayne family being called the royal family of America, or the Bat family having great influence and prestige in the superheroes community was just another type of fame, of prestige, sometimes a tool but more of an annoyance. Danny Fenton knew the weight of the Infinite Realms’ Throne. It was the type of power that reached everything around you and changed all your ties in life and death. He took the smart decision when he refused. But the Realms needed a Monarch. And so Daniel existed.
35 notes
·
View notes
Text
Taken Seriously // H.P x reader
Word Count: 2.2k
Summary: Coming back to Hogwarts to start your 6th year, you had quite the “glow up” over the summer. You visited family over in America and may or may not have gotten several piercings. Most Hogwarts students were tame with their appearance, but you weren’t one to follow trends. How would a certain black haired boy react? Did you remind him of someone? (y/n/n: your nick name)
Author's Note: This one was written for me TBH. I am heavily tattooed and pierced and kinda day dream what a 24 year old me would look like in hogwarts. Not really aging up anyone to my age, but … yea know —
// Requests Open! Should I make this a series? //
Much love, Saige
———-
Your mother called you rebellious, in a loving way of course but she worried about sending you off to school a little more this year.
“Mom no one will probably care.” You laugh, her soft hands resting on your shoulders. She looks over your features once more, the sound of the train and whistles reminding you both that you needed to go. She sighed and placed a kiss between your eyes.
“I know. I love you for exactly who you are.” She smiled, pulling her hands back from your sides. You and your mom had a bond like no other, her scarlet hair matching yours, a small dimple on her left cheek, and a small birthmark placed between your eyebrows. You could’ve been twins in another life. Love radiated through you pulling her in for one more hug.
“I'll be home for the holidays. I promise.” You whispered into her ear. You felt her relax in your arms. You let go giving her a small wink grabbing your positions to board the train. You take a few steps looking back.
“Write to me! Please!” Your mom shouted toward you, her smile strong yet a tear dropping down her cheek. You blew her a kiss and nodded. You looked forward to following the small line of students through the train looking for any open seats. Unluckily for you, most compartments were full to the brim. Students you’ve never spoken to looked at you, some in awe, some in disdain. You shoved your bag over your shoulder and kept walking with your chin proudly.
You looked into a compartment immediately making eye contact with the group you dreaded the most, you turned and rolled your eyes but it was too late.
“OY! Look at the gryffindor rascal now” Draco started standing from his seat. “Looks like you got hit with some metal to the face. Was any of that intentional?” He started, his goons laughing. The students waiting around all turned tuning in to the scene enveloping. You tried to look forward ignoring him but the line of students wouldn’t budge. You were stuck like an animal in a zoo, all of these eyes bouncing between you and Malfoy.
“I'd never. Not that you were particularly pretty before, but this really didn’t help your case.” Pansy quipped. Not that you didn’t expect the backlash, especially from the prissy bitch herself, but hearing it was enough to make your blood boil. Over the summer you didn’t just get piercings, but you grew a few inches, your body stronger from quidditch practice. You felt more confident in your personal appearance but also your ability to stand up for yourself.
“You talk a lot of shit for someone who can’t fight Pansy.” You turn eyeing her down. Over the years you have gotten absolutely sick of the entire slytherin house. For a group of students who were seen as the gloomy emo one, boy did they hate any sense of alternative fashion.
The compartment hushed quickly. Your height towering over her body still sitting on the boothed chair. You could feel the anger rising in you, your hands balling into fists. You had no intent of using your wand, just imagining the idea of lashing out fist-to-cuffs.
You felt students moving ahead of you forcefully to let someone through but you were too focused on the movements of Draco. You could feel the seconds slow as Draco took a step forward, his face red, brows furrowed. His hand slipped into his pocket gripping his wand. Just before he had the chance to pull it out, both of you turned to see who was coming down the aisle, ready to stop if a professor arrived.
“Stop. Stop. Stop.” Harry appeared next to you, his hand wrapping around your wrist pulling you forward both forcing you out of your anger and the situation. You were being pulled through the students; bumping into everyone you passed. He moved with vigor but not looking back at you, focused on only what was in front of him. You felt your shoulders relax the longer it took to get to his compartment. The crowd dispersed and he found a place to slow down.
“Harry sorry i know my emotions got the best-“ You started. He turned around still holding your wrist.
”I heard what they said. I don't blame you.” He said softly. “A physical fight is not the best way to start the year.” He smiled looking over your face, his face morphing with curiosity as he noticed your new facial jewelry.
“Wow” He said breathlessly. You looked back at him wide eyed, not sure if he liked them or not. Moments passed and you weren’t sure he had ever looked at you this long before, your cheeks slowly turning pink. You noticed how your heights now matched, now eye to eye. You swear he glanced at your lips several times but you were still high on adrenaline from before.. right?
“It’s amazing.” He finished. His eyebrows furrowed as he pointed just above your eye. “How bad did those hurt? I can't even imagine.” He laughed quietly rubbing his eyebrows where your piercings sit. You chuckled lightly.
”Only a pinch I promise. Maybe I’ll do yours sometime this school year.” You joked seeing his face seethed dramatically, imagining the pain.
“Maybe you can convince Ron, not me.” He laughed, opening the compartment ushering you in. Hermione jumped greeting you with a hug.
”y/n!” Her arms were so tight around your torso squeezing you as tightly as she could.
“Now those are wicked.” Ron exasperated, pointing quickly close to your nose, your gauged septum hanging from your nostrils.
“Don't pick my nose weasley, so help me.” You joked, Hermione pulling away from her hug. You all sat together talking about your piercings for a few minutes before the conversation moved away to the beginning of the school year. You missed them, happy that you were back to normalcy. All of you shared chocolate frogs and talked about the ministry. You were all just teenagers but the conversation was serious and daunting.
You caught Harry’s gaze a few times. You shook it off thinking he was just looking at your piercings, but he was more interested in how it fit your features so naturally. He didn’t know of anyone with such adornments but he was so infatuated with how more comfortable you seemed with these pieces of self expression. You reminded him of something, or someone but he couldnt put his finger on it. It took him the whole train ride as he wracked his own brain, distracted from the conversations you Ron and Hermione continued.
The train came to a halt and it felt like a light went off in Harry's brain. He looked over to you, laughing at something Ron just said but all he could think about was how much you reminded him of Sirius. He felt his heart race and his breath shallow. He could feel himself staring at you, seeing him in your mannerisms and the way your hair fell. You were strong, didn’t back down from a fight, and never hid your true feelings or artistic expressions. You were different but so similar it made his heart ache. You broke him from his trance standing up.
“Let’s go, Harry. We’ve made it.” You smiled over to him from the doorway, waiting for him to join you. Ron and Hermione were already long gone down the train and it was just you two. He didn’t realize how much time had passed, his attention stuck in his own thoughts. He got up, a little hesitant but smiled effectively as he met you outside the compartment. You two walked off the train quietly just enjoying the scenery and silence. You cleared your throat still feeling like his mind was somewhere else. It worried you.
“You doing okay over there Potter?” You asked, chuckling lightly. You walked shoulder to shoulder down the pathway towards the carriages.
“Yeah sorry. My mind is just.. elsewhere.” He mumbled looking over at you. You made him nervous and he wasn't sure why. You have been friends for years, since the beginning. He always wanted to keep it a friendship between you two, afraid of losing you or ruining it if you didn’t feel the same. He loved the quartet between Ron and Hermione. Everyone balanced each other and it killed him to think you'd leave because of his feelings. It overwhelmed him to silence now that it was so clear. He absolutely loved you.
You two got to the carriages that take you to the school, Professor Flitwick waiting for you both.
“Hurry now you must be the last ones!” His hands ruffled some papers looking dramatically. “Names?” He coughed looking up at you both.
”Professor, you can't be serious.” Harry said, looking between you and Flitwick.
“No exceptions Potter!” He sternly replied, his shoulder slumped realizing his mistake. You laughed, pulling Harry ahead to climb the stairs to the carriage. After a moment you looked across at Harry.
“You can tell me anything you know.” You mumbled, a second attempt to get him to open up to you. Something was clearly bothering him. You notice him shift in his seat nervously, his hands entwined with his own tightly.
”I know y/n/n. I just don't want to lose.. all this.” He gestured vaguely around. You shook your head and laughed slightly not understanding.
“Listen, if it's about you-know-who we are doing everything we can.” You said looking around. “We're safe here. For now at least.” You smiled at him, reaching across, resting your hand on his knee. His breath hitched as you touched him.
“It's not about the school.” He whispered his hands unraveling from themselves. You could see how his demeanor changed. The way he avoided looking at you. You moved and sat next to him, your hand still resting on his knee.
“Harry. Please.” You whispered leaning in. You cared so deeply for this boy, the look on his face was something new. He has been afraid of the impending war but he was strong, stoic, and almost impervious to the dangers he faced each year. This was more subtle, more emotional. He turned to face you, his hand resting on top of yours now.
“I don't want to lose you.” His voice was low but it hit you like knives. He was still heartbroken by the loss of Sirius just months ago, losing someone so close to him made him more aware of the implications of those around him fighting his fight for him. You reminded him so deeply of him, terrified of the fate of you now that you were so close to him. He didn’t know what was worse, not taking the chance to spend the time with you, or losing you later never being truthful with his feelings.
If as the world stopped, he grabbed your face kissing you softly. You were taken back by the gesture, soon melting into his arms. Your hand moving from his knee to his waist, grabbing his robes. As the carriage bounced you both held each other, kissing deeper but slowly. It was clumsy and heated. His hands held your face steady as both of your bodies bounced from the rough roads. His glasses hit your cheeks as you tilted your head, trying to not break from the kiss. You’d do anything to make the carriage stop in the woods, leaving just you two alone for as long as possible.
You dreamt of this moment, day and night, the possibility of holding his hand. Being there for him in more ways than just friendly. You’d do anything for him, to ease his pain, to listen to his stories, to hear his laugh. Every feeling of admiration and yearning rushed through you as the kiss slowed to an end. Nervous to look into his eyes, blushing deeply you kept your hands on his waist. He leaned back rubbing his thumb across your bottom lip, his hands still cupping your hands.
Harry did not speak. In between a state of shock and disbelief in his own actions. Half of him wanted to tell Ron and Hermione what just happened, but the other half wanted to take the secret with him to the grave. For just this moment it was only you two. Your lips both still wet from the kiss, smiling shyly at each other. You both waited for each other to be the first to speak. You looked down and grabbed his hand, your fingers trembling slightly. You leaned your head on his shoulder, both of you silently holding each other as you made it to the castle.
A whirlwind of emotions the past few hours have been, what could happen the rest of the year?
#harry potter imagines#harry potter x reader#harry potter#harrypotter#harry potter headcanon#harry potter fanfiction#hogwarts#hogwarts au#hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry#hogwarts oc#hogwarts houses
39 notes
·
View notes
Note
hear me out, are you open to pokemon charaters? if so maybe an ingo/emmet or a Kieran? or eleasa. if not maybe wolf link or minda? feel free to pick which ever seems the most fun to draw. I just have a lot of characters(sorry)
[id: an uncolored, digital drawing of link and midna from twilight princess. link is in his wolf form and midna is upon his back. link is running, midleap, and midna leans in to brace herself. end id]
i've been wanting to draw wolf link for a hot sec anyway, thanks for the excuse
#doodles#loz#tp#legend of zelda#twilight princess#link loz#midna loz#this is probably the one i took the most seriously#i had a lot of trouble with it but once i kept pushing i got somewhere i rlly liked
45 notes
·
View notes
Text
i love watching ofmd over and over again because every two minutes i'll hear a line and be like ohhh that's where that thing i say every day is from
#seriously when something pops into my brain ill just assume its from ofmd#i once took an entire day to figure out that “hello? anybody home?” in the funniest german sounding accent was actually from ofmd ep 6#yk when the dutch come onto the revenge#but sometimes its from j&w or good omens and the thing is most of the things i quote are from bertie azi or stede#who all talk very similarly#anyway. trying to figure out where “thats the spirit” in a very particular voice is from its been on my mind for two days#probably ofmd until proven otherwise#our flag means death#ofmd#NOOO NOOO I HAVE IT ITS YONDERLAND JESUS CHRIST#that took me way too long#dont know what exact scene or character tbh but i know its mat#good lord#(its from the very first episode i think. i found it in one of my edits. and its elf in debbies flat)
322 notes
·
View notes
Text
some people will be all about mental health awareness and leftist ideals of at least tolerating the mentally ill who show ''ugly'' symptoms until it's someone they know and ''care'' about having a bad day and acting like it in a way they don't find appealing
#[temporary text post tag]#vagueing about irls#everybodys your friend until one time youre too tired to act right after getting yelled at first thing in the morning#worst thing is i trusted her enough to tell her shit none of my other friends know about#liek i genuinely believed we were friends and i wasnt just an accessory so she wouldnt feel lonely and could vent to someone about whatever#now im really wondering if all the shit she told me about other people was real or if she just ditched them as well after they-#- acted emotionally in a way she didnt like#like im sorry people have bad days and sometimes act in none cutesy ways#at this point idk if the few times i did tell her im feelin like shit she took it seriously or just thought i was joking#im kinda assuming the second one#like she did feel and act fairly progressive - she'd often talk about acceptance and understanding#i don't even think she sees this situation as dropping a 'freind'#she's prolly gonna find a way to justify it somehow idk#point is im hurt and need a drink#she even vaguely texted me like 'if someone you knew hurt someone you care about would you try to fix it with them or just block them?'#like not even confront me and say 'you hurt someone i care about so now im ending things'#or just tell me to fuck off or call me a piece of shit#i feel after a year and all of the 'youre a good friend' shit that maybe i was at least entitled to a 'fuck off kys' text and then a block#i shouldve dropped her first - save us both some time#honestly i dont even think she thinks about this at all#im probably just sulking like a kicked dog while she does whatever the fuck it is she does#she probably didnt even care about my side of the story#why would she#honestly she always did most of the talking#i was just there to listen and sometimes make a joke for her to laugh at i guess#like i didnt know i was signing up for a '1 strike and youre out' type deal lmao
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
Man I wonder where the leader of the fear realm could've gone, it's alMOST LIKE NEVIN HAS AN
#had to re-edit the image real quick because the original edit was from a post I made about Drew years ago#and while the Drew thing is becoming less and less likely. Nevin havinv one has basically been canon since#someone mentioned Greg's (was it Britney's) aura being familiar in s2ch1. ive been putting together a list of every line#that points to Nevin's aura throughout the whole thing (most from s2ch1 but then s2ch10 came out and it was really canon at that point)#but clearly i'm running out of time to say ''i fucking called it'' before it's explicitly stated and i dont want to be in another situation#where somebody else will beat me to a theory and me posting anything about it will seem like copying them. sorry about that btw i had#thought i had already mentioned theorizing that nevin was possessed by a demon in that old theory i made but i had forgotten that one was#super old and was about sigma. so no copying there i just got extremely paranoid there was a mention of a cult and i was like ''nuh uh#that's way too specific and out there of a detail to end up in both our theories'' and i forgot the rest of my super old post was outdated#as hell. and echos had gone ''yeah they're so similar!'' and i took their word for it but now i'm realizing they were probably just trying#to be supportive. so yeah no copying there i was just beaten to the punch of saying something. but i will NOT back down from the aura shit#because i have been calling that shit FROM THE START or at least since i started reading ibvs back when ch20 came out.#also not backing down from saying chris was the worse friend because these past few chapters are the first time isaac has done anything tha#could knowingly upset chris meanwhile chris has. let edward drag isaac to the lair after isaac said edward would beat him up. chose not to#believe edward was holding the secrets over their heads because 'it was something isaac had said' and then immediately distrusted edward in#the next chapter because a random person he didn't know said to steal a book (might i mention how that entire scene proves chris' lack of#development and refusal to take responsibility because it perfectly alludes to when chris had brought those fireworks into his old school#and makes me wonder if charlie has actually gotten him in trouble with his past schools or if he's still just not taking responsibility#and if him following nevin to the woods to test out their powers is an extension of ''if something bad happens its not my fault''#like seriously this man would bring a mysterious suitcase onto a plane if he's told to). uh what was i talking about agai#anyway on a related note my mental state has only gotten worse since i left tumblr and the habit of thinking about chris instead of sleepin#or doing schoolwork has not stopped. so i was still failing for a while and might graduate now but am still staying away from tumblr.#so yeah this was a little update and im not going to linger this time im just going to leave tumblr again right after hitting post#addendum because i just can't let things go. and was thinking about chris again. i don't think his lack of development is because of bad#writing (anymore. i used to.). instead i'm certain his character arc is going to continue into him following someone (nevin probably) into#doing something really bad. and then he'll finally get actual consequences and go 'oh shit i fucked up real bad this time'#if you think that theory is reaching too far into the future you should hear mine about isaac dying at the end lmao
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
you ever scroll past some sort of discourse that you didn't even know existed, and you have to take a second and realize that, while none of us are superior to others, some of us ARE much better at choosing which dumbass hills to die on? because I think sometimes you deserve to go 'huh. at least I'm not getting involved in all that'.
#well idk i'm still wasting time typing this out but that's marginally less embarrassing as an outsider than the people arguing about it#tw abuse mention in tags#so APPARENTLY!!!#enneagram mbti people are complaining about enneagram 7s being predisposed to being manipulative (?)#someone's like 'my sister was a 7w8 and neglects her kids' like jesus christ i don't think her enneagram is why she does that?#saying this as someone who LOOSELY AND UNSERIOUSLY enjoys mbti/zodiac/boxes to put my blorbos into:#these people are just doing the zodiac but for people who think they can armchair diagnose others they dislike with cluster b disorders#like congrats you made it worse and combined it with pseudopsychology to make some hellish ableism amalgamation#and it was already stupid to begin with but man you really took it up to 100#like we do realize that this is all fake. right. this isn't an actual psychological profile.#and taking it seriously has worrying implications? and you cannot judge someone based on anything but their behavior?#like again i get having fun with these things as little categories. my autistic ass loves sorting things into categories.#i will give my blorbos full star charts for 6 hours. yay categories.#but with the caveat that it's unserious and for funsies and not at all an actual representation of any human being?#like when i say 'i'm such a taurus lol' or whatever i'm not actually under the impression that it dictates my actual personality?#it's all confirmation bias anyways. people see what they want out of this kind of thing#like yeah i'm kinda lazy and i like food and self indulgence but. that's probably like half of the. idk. virgo population or whatever too#i think those are just things that most human people enjoy unless you're one of those super ambitious go-getters who never slows down#same goes for every other trait. curiosity? emotion? stubbornness? logic? those are just things that most people have in some capacity
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
Okay Idk how much I'm going to engage with posts about tonight's episode or even Bucktommy in general atm because I am devastated by what happened and honestly the more I think about it the more pissed off I get, so it would probably be better for me to not...but ily Bucktommy Nation I hate that we're here rn
#Bucktommy was truly one of the very few bright spots I had to hold onto rn after my dog passed away and the election#so I'm litrally just heartbroken and furious about the direction this ep took. there was no reason or sense behind it it was just awful#to the characters & to Lou & to us as a fandom & I'm really feeling done rn idk if this can be fixed but if it's not I will most likely stop#watching. seriously I was starting to tune out of 911 as far back as probably season 5 and I've watched since it started airing but I was#always pretty casual GA until Bucktommy happened and I fell in love with that ship and Tommy as Buck has always been my fav and he finally#seemed to have something really good going for him. but it seems they've chosen to ruin it and spit on his character and us so 🤷🏼♀️ idek#it just really sucks#I literally cried for like 20 minutes embarrassed to admit but now I'm just mad and sick to my stomach tbh#I've been on the brink for days with everything else and the one thing I thought I could count on to cheer me up does this#911 spoilers#911 abc#bucktommy
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
Meeting someone else with a shared special interest is wild because you’re either going to spend hours talking or you’re going to get into a fight
#emma posts#my autism#my adhd#the drama#or complete lack of it#it’s a toss up#this is how it feels to use Reddit tbh#there’s a reason i only open it a few times a month#but this was also a bit close to what being in knowledge bowl felt like#or maybe more accurately your favorite class#or a sleepover with that other autistic kid that also loved (insert shared interest)#the knowledge bowl example wasn’t quite the same because the in the team I worked best on we all had extensive knowledge in different areas#the team I worked worst on was in the first year I tried it. I was the youngest and only one other person there really knew me#and we had an awkward history. so I wasn’t taken seriously#and sometimes the person with the tense relationship would intentionally convince the other kids to do the opposite of what i said#which would end badly since I’m obsessed with many of the topics I chimed in on#and thus knew the answers to most 😑 I quit that year#and i didn’t try to join again until senior year. my classmates took me seriously and I got put on a team without past drama#one of the people was my own cousin and luckily one I have a good history with 😅#people say if I loved it so much it’s a shame I didn’t do it sooner. but that other person was a year older and would have probably kept#doing what caused the problem. plus I was more exhausted
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
i have been working with kids for four years and i had to write my first ever note just now about a seventh grade boy being inappropriate towards me. i don't know what the hell this could possibly lead to or what. he was trying to feel my legs repeatedly to the point where i had to stop sitting next to him (and i was subbing for his one-to-one para!!!). he's got high support needs. in that kind of job, you're supposed to sit next to them all day and look over their work.
the teacher whose classroom this was happening in could also tell something was wrong. the whole class was acting kinda crazy because it was the day before school vacation week and there was another class coming in to share projects. so like, he was swamped with keeping order already. but we were sitting two feet away from his podium at the front of the room. the kid was giving him and me a hard time when he wouldn't take out his chromebook as he was instructed. and then when he did take out his chromebook, he immediately, for some reason, places it on my lap. he had been ogling my legs the whole time. he puts his computer ON MY LAP. and i'm just like, stunned, because what the hell? can you not keep it on your own lap, for some reason? i don't even know what to say, i just hold it a little above my lap while i'm thinking why on earth would this be happening? he would NOT do this to his regular para if she were here, would he? this can't be normal.
and the teacher sees this and within a minute places a stool in front of the kid for him to put his laptop on. and i'm like. oh ok. yeah. he notices exactly what's happening and that that's not appropriate. and then when the other class comes in to share projects he tells me "miss b——, you don't actually have to sit next to c—— this whole period if you don't want to." and he grabs me a chair for me to go sit with the other paras in the back opposite corner of the room. like he KNEW. and thank you mr. d—— for recognizing that because i was just kind of shocked and didn't know if i was overreacting in my head to all of this.
when there's a point in the class where the kids are discussing stuff, i privately mention what's happened to the para who's sitting closest to me. and she says that the thing about him calling me pretty is something he's been known to do, but the fact that he kept trying to touch my legs is new behavior. and that's a completely different class of behavior. i was telling him NO, don't do that, and he kept doing it. and the fact that he was calling me pretty repeatedly, even when i was giving him instructions that he wasn't taking. and this is the second to last class before the end of the day, so she says she'll take a walk with him before learning center and talk to him about it, and i'm grateful for that. she does. the kid apologizes to me as soon as i come into learning center. but like. WHAT the hell.
i'm STILL like what the hell. this is unfathomable to me. the other adults who i told about this or who witnessed it were supportive of me. but. what to do??? i wrote a long note to his regular para about this, because i knew she was going to hear about it at least from the first para i told. the second para i told about it after school had a kind of... i'm not gonna say enabling reaction, but i suppose since it had already been "taken care of" (or at least, he had been spoken to and apologized) she didn't really have much to add in the way of discipline. i told her what happened after school and she was just like... a little bit, laughing? like oh, yup, that dog. she at the very least confirmed he KNEW what he was doing, that that was not an accident. she said to me "i had a feeling he was going to develop a crush on you" (me and these other paras were together for most of the beginning of the day too). but it's like. it's not about that.
i have worked with children for FOUR years. children have had crushes on me before; i'm quite unfazed by it. boys from the ages of 5-to-15 have told me i'm so pretty before and asked me to marry them. i've never had them feeling up my legs before. i've never had them making me physically uncomfortable. it's NOT about this seventh grader having a crush on the pretty substitute. he is NOT unusual for that, at all. but i've never had a boy of any age or education level repeatedly touching my knees and thighs. THAT is problem behavior!!!
because what if i wasn't assertive enough with him to tell him to stop? what if i was a girl his age? worse, what if i was an adult who encouraged this behavior? i don't come to the middle school to be a seductress. i had no intention in putting on a pair of tights and a skirt this morning of being viewed as an attractive object, especially not by a pubescent boy. what if i did though? what if his interpretation of me wasn't so incorrect and offensive? what if i let him keep touching me inappropriately and saying flirtatious things to me? me, an adult in my mid-twenties, towards a middle school boy?
in no world would that be ok. if i had been feeling up and overly-complimenting a CHILD at my place of work, holy shit would there be reports about me. so a child acting that way could never be ok either. if it'd be firable for me to be reciprocating that action, then that action should not be happening to me. ever. and that child should never repeat that action again to any other adult again.
like i am simply not there to be treated as an attractive young woman. i put on a skirt that shows too much knee and get paired with a boy, though, and that's apparently just a natural consequence. hooo-ly shit. like i don't know what to do. first of all, the more time passes since this has happened, the more i am just unable to stop thinking about it. i wasn't "hurt" or too emotional in the moment but i'm just still processing it and it gets worse. i'm just more and more disgusted.
i don't know what i expect to come out of this, or the email i sent to his regular para. like, am i gonna have to attend a fucking meeting? what is the precedent that this sets for him? WHY do i feel BAD for him about this? well, because he's a child, of course. a child who has done wrong he may not be able to understand. but he knows WHAT he did. he just doesn't know WHY it was wrong.
and i couldn't even say something to him that was like, "well, how would you like it if i was touching you like this?" because young boys do not understand how inappropriate it'd be. i'm sure this kid thought he was gonna get away with what he was doing at the very least. but probably not unlikely he (being a child with no concept of how wrong it'd be) thought he could get some sort of "positive" attention for treating me like this. either way he was simply doing what he wanted to do, with no perspective of how it would make me feel or that it could be classified as harassment. teenage boys think it'd be awesome if the older attractive woman would reciprocate their affections. they're wrong. i, as the older attractive woman of his affection, cannot be the one to convince him of that, though.
i don't know. i don't know. like it's just so not ok. but if i didn't tell another adult about this, he would've gotten away with it. he would probably do it again. and him being in trouble for it is not the same as him understanding that it was wrong. unless someone has a REAL talk with him about inappropriate attention and consent, it's not unlikely that he'll just repeat the behavior in a setting where he thinks he won't be caught or told on. THAT'S the problem. me, i could just never have to be this boy's para again. in my email, i didn't say that i would never be ok working with or around him ever again. he already knows i didn't like it and i'm not afraid to tell on him; as far as that lesson applies to me, individually, i think he's become too ashamed to repeat that.
i don't know. i don't know. i very much expressed that i, i guess, "forgave" him in the email that i wrote. i clarified that i was writing it for the sake of having it on the record. i think that could potentially be very important for the purposes of preventing further similar or escalating behavior from him in the future. i don't want him to be in trouble. i don't think i will be blamed for this, especially not with how promptly i acted, although i don't know to what extent this will be framed as me thinking i'm a "victim." i'm not... i don't feel victimized. i feel disgusted. i feel afraid for the sake of what could happen to or with him in the future, if he thinks behavior like his towards me today is ok.
i feel like if i end up having to further respond to this, this will be made about me. in a way it kind of was. is? in the moment it was happening, it was certainly about me. because i was the one this boy was giving all this unwanted attention to. but to make the consequences of this about me and to involve me any further, i also don't want. because i said what i said already, i don't care if a student has a crush on me. this isn't about me being the pretty substitute. i'm the pretty substitute all the time, to tons of people. that's not really something i've been concerned about up until now.
but do i have to reexplain my personal embarrassment? that i was wearing a skirt? that he was ogling my legs? really? what more do i have to gain from sharing that, other than having the adults at my place of work confirm or deny me in their heads as the pretty substitute? i don't know. perhaps that's REALLY overthinking it. but i don't want to be the substitute that caused a problem for this special ed kid. i don't wanna be the reason that he can't be around me anymore, the person people think of when they're monitoring how he's acting around girls and young women. i DON'T want to be the one people think of when they think of his past misbehavior. i'm NOT here for that.
that's just fucking humiliating. and in this being a thing that could follow him, i have to be ogled and touched over and over again in people's minds for this to be taken seriously. but for this to be swept under the rug would be even worse, no? i don't know. i hate this. the principal is a nice guy; i wouldn't be surprised if he and/or people from the special ed department reached out to me sympathetically about this. but i don't wanna be reached out to. i don't wanna have ppl i work with tell me "sorry that kid was just so attracted to you he couldn't help himself" like come on. if the kid himself doesn't change then i don't really care to remember this incident. and no one reaching out to me and saying they've talked to this kid will actually prove to me he understands. this is the kind of inappropriate behavior it takes years for people to understand why it was wrong, especially a child who has no idea. i mean come on.
#tales from diana#long post#sorry i should probably put this under a read more but it was just a long stream of consciousness#and idk. im tired. im so tired#do you wanna be known as the substitute teacher a kid kept touching inappropriately? probably not#thank god for the first para i told bc she took it really seriously seemingly. i mean idk what she told him in their conversation#not EXACTLY what she told him. she obviously said this was wrong and she reiterated in learning center again#that if that were her daughter she'd be through the roof and that she'd be telling his regular para#i mean of course i had to tell the regular para directly. i would rather it come from my mouth#i'm the one who has the most information of how and why it happened. i think other ppl telling it would just reduce it to#'he thought she was so pretty and he kept staring at and touching her legs cuz she wore a skirt' like come on#the indignity of that!#i already feel undignified enough.#and also thank god for the social studies teacher. the more im processing this the more im like thank god#i dont know him well. he had already been a nice dude to me before in my interactions w him#like as a sub you notice the people who are really affirming of the strange and irregular work you do#earlier this week i was subbing for the math teacher across the hall for instance and he came in before class started and said#that if anyone's giving me a hard time to just send them to him. bc that group can be a little rowdy/wild#my classroom discipline skills are not that bad where i felt the need to have someone more experienced defend me so to speak#like i know i look young and am assumed to be new. but with most classes. i can handle most misbehavior#i can put my foot down in a way kids normally respect. i know how to keep em on task#and for MOST of the day with this kid that's what i was doing. but if that social studies teacher hadn't done what he did#i might not feel so bold in just straight up walking away from that kid. after saying stop stop stop repeatedly#like he had his own job to do independent of me but i remember the gestures and like. i could cry. he KNEWWWW#that's just a very trustworthy person i feel. he didn't want me to suffer through that any longer#a lot of teachers (unfortunately) largely ignore the kids with paras and/or expect the paras to communicate to the kid exclusively#that teacher is not like that. he was willing to mind that boy while i escaped that situation. so so grateful to him
6 notes
·
View notes
Note
Can I hear more about Ava possibly?
HELLO! Sorry for taking truly an eon to reply, around the time you sent the message I was in the middle of moving. Between that and the holidays responding got away from me but I still really wanted to answer! Better late than never I suppose, so without further ado...
So explaining Ava's story requires explaining a good amount of world building. I think Thea has mentioned Demiphics before but the tldr is that they're the children of angels and demons. Heaven and hell have a long history not just with each other but also with Demiphics. Officially, while in the current era relationships between angels and demons are allowed, they're heavily stigmatized and they ARE banned from having children.
As an aside about heaven and hell for context. When I was building this world I knew I wanted it to be an angels and demons/heaven and hell, everything and the kitchen sink sort of setting. But to also kinda look at "Hey a world where people are judged by an arbitrary set of rules and sent to a nice place when they die or a place that sucks would be kinda bad no matter how you slice it."
I wanted to explore a world where heaven and hell are made, not by divine order as a machine that works naturally as intended, but as a concept that multiple institutions are seeking to fulfill. Hell functions as a collection of scattered monarchies, hell wears it's antiquated ideas on it's sleeve. There's the pits of burning hellfire and the society down there is unjust and nightmarish to live in, but demons and the humans cast down there ultimately just have to go about a daily life. It's not fun, it's hard to make a living, but you can still make friends and go to karaoke on the weekend.
Heaven is a very different brand of evil. They hide their ills behind fake pleasantries. They take the lions share of the work when it comes to "judging" humanity (hell is less interested in partaking in heaven's bureaucracy, as long as heaven sends them souls the higher ups are happy to leave the work to them). Heaven and hell are both vast but the first levels you'll see of heaven are seas of clustered office buildings. People's souls are judged by committees of angels, and there's a lot of people thus a lot of committees. A soul hangs in the balance and it's fate can be decided because George the Angel didn't drink enough coffee this morning and just really wants to wrap this up so he can go home.
There is no authority on who's good and bad, there's just rooms full of people arguing with bias and sticking people where they think they should go to meet a quota for the day. Over centuries the guidelines on good and bad actions are constantly being updated and changed, the fates of hundreds of humans are left to the whims of management. There have even been scandals in regards to higher ups pushing for harsher judgement when the budget for processing new souls into heaven gets a little tight.
Thanks to their intent to fulfill a role, humans who make it into heaven are treated fairly well! It's still a living moving society with quite a few problems and not some utopia but your average human is treated to a decent standard of living. This comes with the neglect of their own angels however. They pat themselves on the back for being better than hell, for being a more democratic society, but the angels at the top are largely from well off established families. Working class angels are sort of viewed as disposable.
That's actually a huge problem shared between heaven and hell, demons and angels both are treated as VERY disposable. An attitude largely influenced by the fact that both come into being in wide variety of ways. They can still be born the good old fashioned way but they're just as likely to be born from heaven/hell itself. "I don't have parents, I just popped out of the ground one day as a baby." is not an uncommon story sdfgh.
That brings us to demiphics, I think @dapper-comedy mentioned some of this when talking about Bishop (who will come into the picture again later with Ava hehe) I began writing down all the lore I could off the top of my head about them but then I remembered that I have an entire google doc concerning them! So thankfully I can just share this. (theres a tiny bit of info abt halos at the end which i havent covered BUT yknow more extra fun facts)
ASSUMING the document has been read, I can dive right in with Ava now! Ava ended up under heaven's care as a baby, she lived in the training facility for as long as she could remember and knew absolutely nothing about her birth parents or the circumstances in which she ended up there.
As a young child, the rotating cast of caretakers mean she didn't truly have a constant presence in her life, there were familiar faces but she wasn't allowed to grow truly attached to any of them.
They fed her the propaganda from a young age, telling her how if she's successful and that if she can learn to control her feelings, she can be free and travel not just heaven as an honored solider but see other realms as well.
Very early on she becomes fascinated and obsessed with having wings, demiphics wings manifest as non-physical extensions of their magic. So without her magic, she cannot have wings. It becomes the one thing she truly consciously wants for. The researchers and caretakers notice this and use this to "motivate" her.
Another formative memory for her when she's little, is meeting one of heaven's few success stories. A fully fledged Demiphic solider by the name of Zenith. She's not exactly the warmest and to put it bluntly she speaks like a bloodborne npc (She's got her own whole thing going on sdfghj) but the meeting inspires Ava and cements in her mind that she wants to be a soldier so she can be free and earn her wings.
Her childhood can be described as 1. Monotonous Martial Training and 2. Daily Evil Dark Therapy. She is raised with the intention of having her be able to fully control her feelings constantly. She's not allowed to form emotional connections, she's never allowed to have her own organic feelings.
As you can imagine this creates an intense disconnect between Ava and her own emotions. It's interesting because she's not trained to be emotionless, she's trained to be able to feel any emotion she needs at any moment. She's taught emotions in regards to what kind of magic it corresponds to.
She comes off as very congenial and cheerful because she's also taught about what emotions are expected from her in visible social settings as well.
She lives this deeply lonely, isolated, controlled life until she's 18 years old (or whatever the equivalent in angel/demon years, time moves weird in the different realms)
Around this time a new face enters the picture, an angel by the name of Katrina. Katrina is an angel that works for the government, she used to be a diplomat who traveled to hell but after a year long sabbatical on earth she returned to heaven and transferred to a different position within the government.
Her new position had her visiting the demiphic training facility very frequently and around this time is when she met Ava. When Ava turned eighteen she was given a lot more freedom around the facility. Thanks to her very consistent and good behavior, she was given permissions to move more freely and speak to more people as a sort of test of her training.
Most people passing through that spoke with her were cordial but kept their distance, either out of fear of her or fear of getting in trouble with heaven. Katrina is the first exception, she immediately has a fondness for Ava the first time they speak for a very specific reason. She sees her own child in Ava.
See, when Katrina was a diplomat she spent a lot of time in hell around a lot of important demons. During a party she may have had a one night stand with the ruler of the first layer of hell (He may be the ruler of the first layer aka The City of Dis but he's honestly more of a figurehead that just kinda swings his power around and parties. His many many children and employees do most of the actual work).
And that year long sabbatical she spent on earth afterwards may have had something to do with that. But yeah Katrina had a demiphic child of her own, and being a government worker she was deeply familiar with how her child would be treated in heaven if they knew. So she had her kid in secret and left him at the doorstep of the castle in hell with the hopes he'd have a better life as a prince in hell. (This is a whole entire other character I have named Odd who has a whole ton of other stuff going on but sorry my sweet lad, this aint about you right now asdfgh)
Anywho, Katrina was honestly sort of haunted by this and parts of her regret not trying to find a way to stay with her kid. She had always wanted to raise a kid but life never worked out that way for her. But she was also terrified of being found out and thus having him be taken in by heaven, and so she swallowed that pain and told herself that it was for the best. (She had a small hope that one day she may be able to meet him, and though she never expected he would forgive her or consider her his mother, she bought him a little birthday gift on his birthday every year and stored it away for him just in case.)
When she meets Ava, it's impossible for her heart not to ache, she's around the same age her kid would be. It only takes a few conversations to see how badly heaven messed this kid up. As for Ava, it is instant. Katrina is the first person in her entire life to honestly show even a bit of openness to her. It's like a wildfire, heaven kept the flame burning low but the moment it had any fuel it flared.
It terrified Ava in a way because losing the slightest bit of control of her feelings threatened her future freedom. That plus... it was almost hard for to recognize what she was feeling at all, it was hard for her to even understand what was different or that this was the first person she'd met who considered how she felt when they talked.
It was a kindness she almost couldn't understand, so for a year they consistently crossed paths and spoke. It was rare they had a moment alone to speak, almost always being monitored, but when they did immediately Ava would ask questions she knew she wasn't allowed to and Katrina answered despite the risk.
Katrina is an impulsive person, and she's very aware of this, so she tried her best to not get too invested. She told herself she'd visit and try and be a positive influence on her life but she absolutely couldn't do anything that'd run afoul of heaven......... well she tried sdfgh.
One conversation about six months into knowing each other strikes a real cord. Katrina has realized how hard Ava has bought into heaven's propaganda and Ava's talking about how hard she's working to earn her wings one day.
Katrina is absolutely taken aback by this, because Ava already has wings, they're just sealed away. When Katrina say this, Ava retorts with well yeah, but the only way my magic gets unsealed is by becoming a soldier. And Katrina tells her that other magic user can break that seal, that it's not that heaven will give her wings, it's that they're keeping something that's already hers away from her.
This is a turning point for both of them, this forms a crack in Ava's perception of heaven, and this makes Katrina know she needs to get Ava out of here.
In the following six months, Ava opens up more and starts to question things, starts to struggle with her own feelings and realize she doesn't know who she is. That she doesn't know anything about herself. She feels suddenly lost as her interactions with Katrina makes her realize she hasn't been living as a person. She struggles to find her own preferences, and comes up short, the only things she's ever desired is her ability to fly.
And Katrina makes a plan with her for her escape, promising her that she'll help her fly.
I won't get into the nitty gritty details of the escape plan (mainly because i change my mind of the specifics frequently sdfghj) but around her nineteenth birthday, with the help of Katrina, Ava escapes the facility.
Katrina manages to get away with it despite being questioned because she has a close friend who can secretly harbor Ava.
Avery (another character who has a whole entire in-depth story because I have Too Many Characters and they are all interconnected.) Has a workshop for his art and tinkering on the floating islands of third layer of heaven.
So basically what happens is Katrina shows up to Avery's workshop in the middle of the night with a blanket draped over Ava and goes like "Okay listen, I can explain, you have to promise not to get mad at me." Before revealing Ava and her very obvious horns that stick out like a sore thumb in heaven.
Despite his complaints about the recklessness of the entire situation, he allows her to stay. They eventually get her a pendant to glamour her in her day to day, so she can go around without being immediately spotted.
And with that she joins a little crew of people who hang out with a common goal in heaven! I call them the heist crew bc everyone who hangs out there has a bone to pick with the government in heaven, as well as their own goals. Sometimes that culminates in them stealing objects or information from various government facilities and using it to further their own means. But also it's kinda like that thing where it's like "Oh we're a club that does this!" but ninety percent of the time they just hang out and slack off instead of doing what they're supposed to sdfghj.
I won't go over everyone since this is supposed to be about Ava and this is meant to focus on her but she becomes quite close with a number of people who frequent Avery's workshop!
Avery himself is the first person she latches onto. He has an aloof detached sort of air at first but it very quickly becomes clear how caring an attentive he is. He was once a classically trained artist turn tinkerer and many years ago he suffered an "accident" (it's a long story) that injured the left side of his body greatly, causing him to lose an arm, leg, wing, and eye. With the help of his father long after the event, he crafted himself prosthetics out of marble and gold and enchanted them to move lightly and fluidly.
He can't always wear them, and most of the time he gets around his shop in a wheelchair, but he is particularly attached to the arm he designed and created. So even when he isn't using it, it's never far from him. His current project is even more ambitious, he's attempting to design wings from scratch through a fusion of machining and magic.
Aside from a desire to create a new wing for himself, he believes that any and all denizens of heaven deserve access to flight. Humans, angels who've lost their wings, and even more controversially, demons.
Ava is intimidated by Avery at first because he's difficult to read, but one night she comes across him experiencing rather bad phantom pains and helps bring him his medication. This breaks the ice between them and once he's feeling more himself, he shows her some of the little trinkets he's working on. Clocks and music boxes and stuff like that. Ava finds herself absolutely enraptured and Avery is amused and excited by how truly interested she is.
They talk long into the night and when dawn is barely peeking over the horizon, he gifts her a little music box that he made some time ago before they part ways for the night (day?) . From here they slowly develop a sibling-like relationship and when Avery tells her about his big project attempting to make wings, she's besides herself with excitement.
See, she's free now, she could unseal her magic, but as she discovers who she is as a person, a creeping fear takes hold. She fears she won't be able to control her magic, and that she could accidentally lash out at the first people she's come to care about. So Avery, as well as Katrina, let her know it's perfectly okay for her to take as long as she needs to. Avery assures her that even if it takes her a lifetime to feel comfortable unsealing her magic, he'll be happy to make mechanical wings for her the moment he gets them working.
Speaking of Ava discovering who she is, the second person she becomes close with is Bishop. Bishop is @dapper-comedy's character and I believe they've spoken about them before! Demiphic, escaped from a cult, fought in fighting rings at the heart of the third layers main floating islands. Currently frequenting Avery's shop and struggling to figure out their relationship with their estranged mother, amateur carpenter. (Thea could probably tell you more details about Bishop overall especially since it's been a moment since we discussed these characters and some details are a little foggy on my end sdfghj)
Ava immediately gravitates towards Bishop. They are MUCH more standoffish than anyone else they've met at the workshop, but I don't think anything could stop Ava from wanting to get to know them. Bishop is the first other Demiphic she's met outside of her confinement, and on top of that their magic is unsealed.
Ava has a deep admiration for them, for the way they wield their power. Their friendship is much more of a slow burn, neither really knowing how to approach each other. But Bishop is one of the first people that helps Ava discover more about herself.
She was trained all her life to act a certain way and so her default is a very pleasant bubbly sort of attitude. As she starts to figure out how to be herself however she discovers that at heart she's really much more of a subdued person. She tends towards a quiet, more monotone set of mannerisms. Her friendship with Bishop helps her discover this.
Around people she doesn't know or when she's uncomfortable and out of her element, she adopts her pleasant exterior. Only around people she's really comfortable around does she let it drop, and Bishop is one of the first people that sees that side of her.
The final person she forms a very strong bond with is a familiar face. None other than Giselle! This takes place a VERY long time after everything that happened with the Braithen Kids (+wonky time dilation stuff with the planes), after Giselle died she was sadly the only one who went to heaven dfghj.
I don't recall exactly how Giselle fell in with the heist crew. (I think it had something to do with Bishop's mother, Rose. But I may be misremembering, Thea correct me if I'm wrong dfghj) but! Once she's there she and Ava really hit it off.
Due to often being bedridden in life Giselle is practically cartwheeling through heaven, unrestrained summer fun. Ava immediately befriends her (she meets her after she's gained a bit more confidence interacting with people) and their friendship acts as a vehicle for Ava to catch up to all the mischief she never got to get up to before.
Giselle shares an intense interest in flying as well, and they both are very invested in Avery's mechanical wings project. Frequently asking him about it and planning their own ill advised test flight experiments to help him gather data (which he Did Not ask them to do).
And that's most of the info about Ava! There's small things I could mention. Like how she develops a love of birds spurred on by a little bird necklace Katrina gets for her on a day they decide is her birthday (since she doesn't know the actual date) And how it's the first gift she receives in her entire life, but certainly not the last.
Or how Avery and Katrina take her out to buy clothes for the first time since she really doesn't have much to wear. She struggles making choices for herself, since her clothes were always given to her. Her entire life was light flowing white dresses, embroidered with constellations, and supplied to her directly. She initially picks out similar things, uncertain what else to do. But then she sees a sturdy bomber jacket, and feels a fragile yearning for it.
With Avery and Katrina's encouragement, she gets it for herself. It's the first time she makes a choice for herself based on what she herself really wants. Plus it starts her on a path to discovering she prefers more sturdy androgynous fashion.
There is one more thing, a thread me and Thea haven't quite finished... As time passes and she grows more comfortable with her current life and the people around her, she starts to have strange dreams. Dreams of a garden... and in these dreams she sees someone, and feels as though this someone is calling out to her.
The person she sees looks an awful lot like her, a little bit older... She looks almost like... a sister perhaps? *dramatic musical sting*
BUT YES, she has a demiphic sister named Odette (another character from the Epic Mind of Thea) who begins to reach out to her through her dreams. And through this connection perhaps she'll discover more about the circumstances of her birth and just Who this familiar stranger is. Tune in next time to find out more (when me and Thea actually write more of this story sdfghj)
Aside from that as a little bonus for this taking so long, I scrounged up some Ava art! I haven't drawn her in quite a while so these are kinda ancient but they serve their purpose. Writing this is making we wanna draw her again...
and then these three are a series I did drawing some of the Demiphics! In order from left to right we have Ava -> Bishop -> Odd
#i really hope i explained this well I wrote this in multiple sittings so if its a little disjointed That is why#part of why this took a while was bc i had to go back and reference old convos me and thea had to refresh myself on character details#EVEN THEN! this probably isnt everything#This is such a simple question but shes SO entrenched in the world building I truly went wild answering this#THANK U FOR YOUR PATIENCE....#Ava sits at the crossroads of so much world building and so many characters#i didnt even mention half the members of the heist crew just the ones closest to Ava in the interest of actually getting this posted#oc tag#this entire world is the most self indulgent thing in the world and i love it dearly#taking the very middle school idea of 'what if there was a half angel half demon and they had magic controlled by their FEELINGS'#and taking it very seriously#extremely fun and freeing
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
me when i play the class that medics uber and i get. ubered
#yesterday i had the very important job of taking out a heavy+medic pair raiding our spawn and today i got sent to destroy an engie's nest#(by that i mean a teleporter. dispenser and lvl 3 sentry+the engie that built it and a pyro that was i guess just tagging along) (i'm sorry#to them but you don't say no to your medic)#with the first one it wasn't perfect but i DID kill them both and i also destroyed the nest so 💪💪💪#STILL. a fucking scary experience to suddenly see my screen light up and i have to stop fucking around#the medic today actually i guess took it upon themself to lead our team to victory (we did win yay) because they found me and told me via#voice commands that a sentry is ahead and to GOOO!!! GO THEM ZHEM!!!#AND it's also so funny honestly. i get so protective of our medics. we stumbled upon a demoknight in our sewers i mean me and the medic#that sent me to that nest and ofc you take out the medic first but i still go like NO!!! NO!!! LEAVE DOCTOR ALONE!!!!! SHOO!#it's not like that guy was harmless too. no. they took out the ubersaw and started hacking#also unrelated but one guy was like scout in our intel can anyone take care of that. and i usually hang out near spawn so i'm like lol sure#maybe i'll get him. i. exploded him point blank and the guy congratulated me :3 yaaayyy#<that was also probably like. the most organized. communicated match i've played so far and the dude was just generally nice from what#i read when i glanced at the chat. peace and love forever#JESUS. seriously sorry about the diary entires in the tags but i um. i just get excited at the beauty of gaming ok?
18 notes
·
View notes
Text
i mentioned needing to buy a button-up and a tie today and mum asked if i had the suit already. i do, so then she asked if i got it at a thrift store
i'm not sure how i feel about her reaction to the fact that i didn't. she seemed a bit surprised and was like "oh i hope it wasn't expensive" and like it was, but to me it's an investment in my future
but i'm not sure my mum sees or understands that when i think of my future i think of formal wear being suits and ties, not like, blouses and women's blazers (but she has understood that i will not be wearing a dress like. ever again)
but idk, maybe i'm just overreacting or overthinking and she genuinely was thinking about my finances (but even then that makes me bristle a little bit, i can take care of them myself)
#but seriously finding the right size took enough attempts that if i'd had to do it at a thrift store i would have just given up#there are not that many black suit jackets at any given thrift store#and the size was probably not the most common one#a small one in terms of size but with a plus size fit#because i have small shoulders and more curves than ...most cis men#but i managed to find one that fit well and the price wasn't completely ridiculous
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
i hate when ppl see that you're conventionally attractive in some respects and think that means you've never suffered anything in your life. Quite the opposite for me, personally
#BECAUSE people assume that i suffer more actually. bc people try to ignore me to over compensate thinking im just getting endless#praise 'i dont deserve' elsewhere 😒😒😒😒🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄#i promise whoever doing this: you are not new or revolutionary for this. like i really really promise. this was my entire childhood w#certain family members. its far from new. its played. its tired#MOST people default to this. they think the confidence i have is bc of ppl blowing smoke up my ass when its more of some sort of rube#goldberg machine just barely getting by enough to look confident. im like two kids in a trench coat of confidence over here#ALL of this is self built. ALL. OF. IT.#i decided if no one was going to meaningfully love me- unconditionally- then i needed to be that for myself.#and bitch i took that shit seriously.#bc i refuse to let other ppls weird hangups about me make me think im just the worst person in the world when 80% of the time#im not even really doing shit.#the other 20% im probably doing shit bc im defending myself from some shit. hardly am i the one who WANTS to fight.
0 notes