#this is probably NOT gonna be a thing; i'm just having a bit of fun

[n30n-l1ghts]

Tokyo revengers basic NSFW headcannons pt. 1

characters- Mikey, Draken, Mitsuya, Baji, Kazutora, Chifuyu, Hakkai, Nahoya, Souya, Hanma, Kisaki

Mikey-

Packing a respectable 5.8 inches, with a light pink tip and a couple of small bluish purple vains that aren't really noticeable unless he's painfully hard, he doesn't really curve to one side or the other, but he has a subtle upward curve. He doesn't strike me as the type who tries too hard with grooming, but he at least tries every now and again. But the hairs down there are the same pretty strawberry blonde as his hair, pretty thin and a little wispy with a slight curl towards the end.

Draken-

PUH-LEASE. This boy is fucking HUNG and he knows how to use it too. Curves hard left as well. He doesn't have the most experience as I can't imagine him sleeping around much, but he's heard the girls at the brothel complain enough that he generally knows what to do and what not to do. 7.9 inches holy GAWD. I think he stays pretty on top of grooming, manscapes at least once every other week. Also blonde, but I think he's got more curls than Mikey. Definitely a lot thicker. Also, completely random, but I feel like he'd totally fuck with coconut body wash and shampoo.

Mitsuya-

Another man who's got a rather mid-sized length, I'd say probably like 5.4. The prettiest pinkish lavender tip, and oh my god I mean it when I say this man's cock is beautiful. It deserves to be worshipped. Not all that big, BUT he makes up for it by knowing all the sweet spots. Not to mention he's the KING of foreplay and aftercare. He for sure stays on top of his grooming game, he can't stand feeling like he looks sloppy. He's got a pretty tuft of curly white hair right at the base of his dick, very well maintained and usually actually smells pretty good. Again, this man is on top of his hiegene and he wants all of him to smell good and look good at all times. (Not that he could ever look bad)

Baji-

I'd guess about 6.3 in size for him, and his tip is red and angry like his face (I'm joking. Mostly, but he does get painfully hard very quickly) there's a thick ass pinkish vein that runs from base to tip, and he will full body shiver if you lick the whole thing. I'm sorry, but I cannot for the life of me imagine that this man gives a singular fuck about grooming down under. He might trim a little or shave on occasion, but that's only if it gets annoying. However, his hair is effortlessly shiny and beautiful no matter where it is on his body. I have no idea how he does it. But, if it bugs you, he would (begrudgingly) start manscaping more often.

Kazutora-

LITTLE DICK SUPREMACY

Okay- little known fact, but I kind of have a thing for subby guys with little dicks, that and I want to give some variety so I'm not making them all unrealistically huge. So I'm gonna say this man sits at about 4.2. Not rediculously small, but definitely not big either. But it's okay, because he'd much rather be under you anyways. Slightly unrelated but this boy has trust issues so please be kind to him, hold his hand and tell him how good he's being, he will absolutely start crying. Never really even thought about his hair down there, never paid any mind to it, and probably wouldn't unless you brought it up. But I see him being super understanding and chill with it if you want him to groom more often.

Chifuyu-

Another one on the slightly smaller side, probably only around 4.5 to 4.6 with a sort of muted pink tip. He's actually kind of self conscious about it, so he's a bit sensitive if you make fun of him for it, but he'll fold instantly if you praise him in any way, shape, or form. I feel like he's the type to get all embarrassed and blushy super easily despite trying to play it cool. Would not admit he's a bottom out loud but everyone can pretty much tell anyways. Honestly pretty clean, I feel like pubes might bug him. He might try to keep a small tuft down there just because he feels it's more masculine, but I'd reckon he'd prefer it clean shaven. Less of a hassle and it doesn't get on his nerves that way.

Hakkai-

Oh, this poor sweet boy. So much dick that he has no idea how to use 🥺 I can't imagine him topping for the life of me, so it's almost adorable how his monstrous 8.3 inches just hangs there uselessly hanging as he gets pounded into his next life, squealing like a little bitch, whimpering and whining and pleading and- *AHEM* anyways. I imagine he's pretty alright with grooming, mostly because he super looks up to Mitsuya, who had told him at some point or another that it was important to look clean everywhere. But I don't think he's quite that good at manscaping though to his credit, he does at least try. He's got a decent sized tuft of thick, curly black hair that he trims maybe once a month or so when he remembers. But he'd get better about it in a heartbeat if you asked him to and gave him some basic block of instruction. Smells like vanilla though, so there's that.

Nahoya-

Nahoya's got a relatively solid 6.2, with a slight curve to the left and a pale tip. I feel like he'd probably be more experienced with it than his brother, even though his twin is a little bigger. He just strikes me as much more of the playboy type. (Probably gets hard after a good fight, I don't make the rules) super duper curly hair down there, ginger just like the hair on his head. Probably keeps it moderately well groomed. Enough to be presentable for the ladies (and the lads-)

Souya-

Similar to his brother (no shit they're identical twins) but with slight differences. For starters, he's ever so slightly bigger, measuring up to about 6.6, and he curves pretty hard right instead of slight left. He's not too experienced, but he strikes me as a rather quick learner. He doesn't normally care to groom all that much, but after getting into a relationship, especially if you guys are sexually active, he will actually start to manscape on occasion. Also super duper curly hair, but it's light blue instead of ginger, again matching his hair.

Hanma-

(Definitely gets INSTANTLY rock hard after a good fight, I don't make the rules) 7.9, same as Draken, difference is that Hanma has less girth. A tall, skinny dick for a tall, skinny boy. But he knows how to break you and he will go hard when he's domming. Or alternatively, when he's in the mood to sub, he gets a little bratty (just give his cock a rough squeeze and he'll shut right up) dark brown almost black hair, thick and curly. Contrary to popular belief I feel like he would put at least some effort into grooming, though he does forget sometimes.

Kisaki-

Oh, this boy. Solid middle of the road (just like his height- jk this boy short asf) but I think he'd have maybe around a 5.3 or 5.4 length wise. Pretty average around too, not particularly skinny but not particularly girthy either. Would absolutely fight you for dominance every time, and lose every time. This boy would rather die than ever admit he's a bottom, and he's 100% a brat until you edge him to the point he's sobbing. DEFINITELY clean. Well kept, grooms just about every day to every other day, and I feel like there's a fifty fifty chance he also dyes his pubes blonde. I can see him doing that. But this man hates being dirty at all. And tell me why I feel like his hipster ass smells like pumpkin spice all year round? All in all, a well kept, bratty little bitch.

[compressedrage]

Okay I can't not talk about this anymore– I've got a headcanon/canon-compliant au/interpretation of the Life Series events (as I'm sure many of us do) and the most recent season is working so well I just have to talk about it somewhere

sticking it under a cut, bc I just know im gonna go off and make a long post :P

(I haven't been in this fandom very long, so this is probably not very original, but I don't care! I'm having fun! anyway–)

The Life Series is a time loop. And Grian is the one who's keeping it going.

It was just meant to be a fun game, but then the Watchers found him. They warped Grian's game into their own twisted tournament, with the intent to take the winner as their champion.

They're about to take Grian again, when he reaches out with the power he'd kept locked away, and he resets the world.

Every time the bloodshed stops and the Watchers are about to reap their champion, Grian wrenches them back into the void and forces a world reset.

Except... with every reset, the world cracks a bit more. First, it was the boogey man. Is it the Watchers trying to push their influence on the players? Or is it something else? Grian isn't sure.

It goes until Secret Life. And then Grian is absolutely sure, because the world has shifted enough for the Watchers to slip their claws into it. They've gotten impatient. They want their champion. Grian tries, but there is only so much he can do with the weight of the tasks on his back. His own power is beginning to slip through too– he even manages to bring Jimmy back for a time, even if it's only a ghostly projection.

And then it's over. Grian is dead, drifting in the void.

(I have a scene in my head where he speaks with Mumbo while waiting for the end of the session. he basically tells Mumbo that he's been doing this and he doesn't know how to stop it, because he has to save them all)

And then Scar wins. And it nearly breaks him. Grian hovers over him, prepared to grab him and reset the world, when the Watchers yank Grian back into the void. It's a harsh, eldritch conflict in the void, and it's all Grian can do to hold onto his sanity, and throw his friends into the next loop.

But in it all, he momentarily forgets Scar. Still in the previous loop. He goes back to get him, but it's been an entire year for Scar. He's weary, and barely registers that Grian is real.

This new loop is the most broken yet. But Grian is still holding it all together as best he can. If it weren't for him, every weird aspect of this world would descend on his friends all at once and they would instantly die and Grian would lose track and then he would lose them–

So he holds things back, trying to keep things straight and monitor how his friends are doing. But he's starting to slip.

Mumbo knows what he's doing, and it doesn't sit right with him.

Scar is a victor. And his lonely year has given him plenty of time to regain lost memories.

Ren doesn't quite understand everything, but he knows Grian knows way more than he should.

Grian's not going to be able to hold it all together for much longer.

[mosspodge]

HELLO @okartichoke I AM HERE WITH MOSSY'S GUIDE ON HOW TO START SEWING: A VERY MESSY TUTORIAL

I am extremely self taught, so this is gonna be a lot of links and infodumping!!!! Hopefully this helps a even just a little bit :>

SO! I honestly got into sewing through youtube during covid, largely bc i wanted silly fun clothes! There are a loooot I could recommend to you out there, but I personally find that the more chaotic and learn-as-they-go people help me the best! Rachel Maksy and The Stitchery are, to me, some of the best to learn from! Which is honestly pretty funny since they tend to just fully wing it most of the time lol. While i could recommend excellent sewists like the amazing Bernadette Banner (who is actually the first sewing channel I watched!), I find that the more loosey goosey the process, the more i can learn, if that makes sense? I find it helpful to watch people trial-and-error their way through projects and show where they succeeded and failed since I get a better grasp on their process that way.

The best way to start sewing, in my humble opinion, is to grab whatever sewing machine you can get your hands on and play around with it! Read the manual, find a tutorial video on how to thread the machine, grab some scrap fabric and play around! You don't really need any special needles or feet (the little thing that holds the fabric down), unless you wanna get started sewing denim or velvet or something Speaking of which, learn about fabrics!!!!! I learned mostly by going to joanns, touching the fabrics, and looking at the content labels. Everything has different uses, and while two things might both be cotton, one could be knit while the other jersey (tshirt fabric). I like this video for learning the basics! Tbh this one took me a while. Usually patterns have recommendations for what fabrics to use, so that's always a good place to start!

Patterns. Ah my arch nemesis. Unless you decide to start drafting your own patterns (or get a mannequin and learn how to drape fabric), you're probably gonna need to use one. There's two major things i recommend for this: 1) Make sure there's a video tutorial online before buying, and 2) start with something you might actually use/wear. Pattern instructions are notoriously vague, but thankfully many wonderful people make video tutorials for them! And while you might be tempted to grab one of those beginner friendly patterns, they can sometimes be. real ugly and not well fitting. Also boring! Finding something you like will hold your attention better and make you actually wanna finish it!

Ok SO. getting into more of the cosplay sewing stuff. First things first my knowledge here is a bit more limited, unfortunately. Fortunately there are many wonderful people out there with tutorials!! So if you wanna learn more definitely look there!!! General tip for cosplays + more complex sewing: MAKE MOCK UPS PLEASE IT SUCKS BUT IT HELPS SO MUCH. Go find the ugliest fabric in the sale bin and buy a few yards, then use it whenever you wanna test patterns. It might be tempting to immediately start cutting and sewing the finished garment, but the truth is that patterns rarely fit perfectly well (especially if they're fitted/tighter on your body). Make an ugly, barebones version first with your bad fabric, take notes, and then start making the finished piece. It'll save you money and sanity.

As for cosplay youtubers, I heartily recommend Sarah Spaceman, since not only do her videos show her process, she also does segments teaching you more about sewing!! She tends to tackle more complex projects, and watching her take those on has helped me a lot :} For cosplay patterns etsy usually has quite a few! I like Indigo Patterns (they have a good array of loz patterns I need to buy) as well as Alice in Cosplay Land. Please note that I haven't bought from either, but both their etsy shops have wonderful reviews and I plan to buy from them in the future!

not gonna lie I am getting very sleepy so I'm gonna cut it off there for now! Hopefully my rambling helped lol. Feel free to ask me any questions or for any clarification!

[levithestripper]

Fanfic writer interview

Thank you sm for the tag Liza!! I'm gonna put it under the cut so I don't clog the dash :)

How many work do you have on AO3?

51!!

What's your total AO3 word count?

206,615. I fear I might have a problem lmao 😅

What are your top 5 stories by kudos/likes?

Slutty Seashell (The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild) (1,233 kudos). I wrote this in 2020 and I'm lowkey still proud of it.

Braids of Gold (The Hobbit (Jackson Movies)) (579 kudos). This was a really fun fic to write, I can't get enough bagginshield fluff in my life.

What A Needy Little Thing (The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild) (506 kudos). Another one I wrote in 2020!! The sidon/link brainrot went HARD that year.

Slutty Hero (The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild) (445 kudos). ANOTHER 2020 sidon/link smut fic lmao.

Press Your Lips Up Against Mine (The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild) (302 kudos). First non-smut sidon/link 2020 fic! I really like this one, I might rewrite it one day.

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! I love responding to comments!! I like it when authors reply to me when I comment, so I try to return the favor when I get comments! The only time I don't respond is when I really like the comment and want to hog the notification lmao.

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

I don't really write angst, so it's probably a tossup between Hello My Old Heart (Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan) and Like the Ones I Used to Know (Stranger Things (TV 2016)).

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

I'm not sure how to decide which has the "happiest" ending, since pretty much all of my fics end happily, but one of my favorite happy endings is You'll Always Be My Prince (House of the Dragon (TV)). Technically it's not finished yet, but I really enjoy writing the endings of the chapters so I guess that counts lmao.

Do you write crossovers?

No, I don't read them or write them.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Probably, but I don't remember what fic it was or what the hate was about. I don't let hate comments bother me all that much, I just delete them and move on.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Most of what I write is smut! I enjoy writing it, and it comes easily to me, so a lot of my writing ends up being dirty, nasty, and freaky lmao. I write a lot of M/M slash and character/reader smut!

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

No, not as far as I know!

Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, I've only ever received translation requests where my work would be uploaded to another site, so none have been translated. If it were a request where it'd be translated and uploaded to AO3, I'd like that!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, but I'd like to! It sounds like it'd be fun.

What's your all-time favorite ship?

Oh god, how dare you make me choose?!?!? It's a tossup between Athelnar (Ragnar Lothbrok/Athelstan) and Zelink (Link/Zelda). They both make me feel so violent and insane that I feel a little bit crazy. I've been a fan of Zelink since I was a kid, and Athelnar for maybe 2/3 years now I think? I need to write more for both of them immediately.

What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

I have a 7k-long Athelnar fishing WIP that I really want to finish, but I'm stuck on a scene and I don't know if I'll ever get over that hump. I love the story I've created so far, so I hope one day I'll get to share it with you all.

What are your writing strengths?

Oh man, I'm not sure? I think I'm pretty good at writing scenery/describing backgrounds/where the characters are? I really enjoy writing them so I hope that conveys in the quality of my writing.

What are your writing weaknesses?

I will write maybe 100-300 words and call it a day. I can't seem to write anything of substance for long periods anymore, which really bothers me. I wish I could write at a faster speed than GRRM but alas, that doesn't seem possible lmao.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I don't mind it, as long as the author provides translations for it that are readily accessible. When I write dialogue in a different language, I'll either use the tone tag to tell the reader that it's in a different language, and then write the actual dialogue in English, or I'll write it as is in the other language and provide translations in the author's notes.

What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to?

Definitely Leofric/Uhtred and Uhtred/Alfred! And I've been rewatching Ted Lasso, so possibly something for that as well! I want to write more for TLK and Vikings in general.

What's your favorite fic you've written?

I know I mentioned it previously, but probably You'll Always Be My Prince (House of the Dragon (TV))! It's my first longfic with an OC who is basically a self-insert at this point. I have so many ideas I want to write for this story that it feels like I'm gonna explode.

No pressure tags: @nxuvillette, @itsnathateasy, @bouncehousedemons, and @tinyluvs.

Fanfic writer interview

Thank you @thelettersfromnoone for the tag!! 💖

How many work do u have on AO3?

3, not your local AO3 girlie lmao

What's your total AO3 word count?

8 534

Your top 5 stories by kudos/likes

I'll go with Tumblr ones, cause from my 3 AO3 works the biggest number I got is 31 lmao

Anyone but you (Legolas x f!reader)

Night watch (Legolas x Reader)

Well-deserved rest (Haldir x f!Reader)

One messy night (Boromir x f!Reader)

Transition (Haldir x f!Reader)

Honorable mention (since it's not fics but headcanons)

Green Council receiving a hot pic from you (HotD)

TLK men's reaction on being pet named

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I always try to respond to comments! These little things are brightening up my day, so I wanna let the people know that they are my heroes hahaha

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

I really think it's Transition. All in all it's a pretty dark story, a bit depressing I think (I had these intentions while writing at least).

Otherwise, I don't think I have angsty endings fics?

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

New family members for sure!! Was thinking hard what to choose, cause I think all of my happy ending fics are on the pretty same level on a happy scale, but I remember that I have this gen, non romantic baby and I love it so much ❤️‍🩹 There's a little TLK OMC for y'all

Do you write crossovers?

I wanted to say I've never done this BUT THEN!!! My Assassin's Creed (Ezio) x LOTR little headcanon!!! My beloved child!!

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

No, not that I remember getting any hate on my fics

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I do, tho not much and on rare occasions. I used to write a lot of smut when I was younger (a teen), then I stopped being comfortable with it for a wild few years (tho reading never made me uncomfortable lmao).

Now I started writing smut again, idk what kind? Don't really understand what does that mean lol F x M traditional sex? Pretty detailed? If so, then yes lmao

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don't know 😂 Maybe, maybe not. I think rather not.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not to my knowledge, I don't think so.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

We tried with my friend a long long time ago. Didn't go well lmao It's hard and kinda stressing, cause you never know what the other person is gonna write (at least we had this SURPRISE system), so... You kinda have zero plot cause everything you want to write plot-wise can be ruined by the second person's plot lmao

What's your all-time favorite ship?

Athelnar?? Athelstan and Ragnar were my first ever OTP (quickly followed by Alfred and Uhtred). You could never beat that Athelnar shit out of my body lmao I've never written for them, but oh I do love them boys!

What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

Now, that's the HARSH one lmao

I think I have at least 3 OC stories that I really wanna write (2 for TLK and one for LOTR), but I'm scared that I will never actually do it. I never was good with multi chaptered stories, and these are indeed not a one shots 🥲

What are your writing strengths?

Ugh... I don't know? I think I was pretty good with dialogues and descriptions of the surroundings to build the atmosphere. But... I guess it's not for me to decide but for the readers?

What are your writing weaknesses?

I rarely finish what I've started lmao I should write everything in one go or else I'll never finish it... Or will finish it in two months even if it's a 2k words one shot

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I love them! I've only done it with my LOTR fics (with Sindarin) but I really love it. But I really love it when the language is different from the language of the settings? Like, if the story is happening in England and everyone is English, but you have two characters who can speak idk Dutch, let them have a Dutch language in their dialogue. I had a rant post about it not that long ago actually lmao You have to think about your in-universe language

What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to?

Ahhh Bungou Stray Dogs! I love them, and I'd gladly try to write something for them. Not a character/character but reader my beloved.

And maybe Stephane Narcisse (reign) my beloved and a reader

What's your favorite fic you've written?

The blood on my hands (Eomer) and Peace (Finan) are definitely my fave ones I think. They are dark and both explore some trauma

No pressure tags: @whitedarkmoonflower @lord-aldhelm @holy3cake @gemini-mama @emilyhufflepufftlk @persephones-journey @solinarimoon @mrsalwayswrite @emmanuellececchi @bilbotargaryen @levithestripper @mrsarnasdelicious @paula-in-dreamland

[hojiteaversion]

what I read/watched - december 2023

(In bold are my favorites)

essays/articles

Literature and Philosophy - Italo Calvino

The Study of Sexual Fantasy in Women: a Review of the Findings and Methodological Challenges - Martin Seehuus, Jessica Clifton, Darya Khodakhah & Madelyn Lander

The White Album - Joan Didion

On Essays and Essayists - Brian Dillon

Reading in the Age of Constant Distraction - Mairead Small Staid

Social Media Is Not Self-Expression - Rob Horning

Heaven and Nature - Edward Hoagland

Has Self-Awareness Gone Too Far in Fiction? - Katy Waldman

Wounded Beauty: An Exploratory Essay on Race, Feminism, and the Aesthetic Question - Anne Anlin Cheng

books

The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes - Suzanne Collins

short stories

Obsession - Clarice Lispector (using the temptation of Eve/Fall from Eden to frame an abusive relationship... please read it)

Pierre Menard, Author of Don Quixote - Jorge Luis Borges

The Winner Is... - Elaine Crauder

poetry

What Kind of Times Are These - Adrienne Rich

The Directions - Christopher Gilbert

The Raven - Edgar Allan Poe

Fucking in Cornwall - Ella Frears

An Attempt at Jealousy - Marina Tsvetaeta

movies/tv/videos

Plagiarism and You(Tube) - hbomberguy

Do Revenge (2022) - dir. Jennifer Kaytin Robinson

[sysig]

Some highlights from a tense but still very Winterkov-y scene (Patreon)

[silverware-is-interesting]

some undertale yellow (and undertale i guess-) doodles and other drawings

[buttercup-art]

hey

[rosepetalgold]

Not to add angst to a delightfully fluffy little episode but I'm thinking about how the pairings in TSNAND illustrate the current (not good!) state of things in the mindscape and the rampant tension between all the sides. Because really, despite all the possible duos, I think the pairings we got were the only pairings that were feasible so that all six of them got to have an enjoyable day.

Janus and Remus are probably the easiest two to pair off because of the general animosity between them and the others—Virgil clearly doesn't get along with either of them, Roman might maybe tolerate Remus but probably wouldn't have a good time and would definitely rather dropkick Janus out of a window than try to spend a nice day with him, and Logan is presumably still upset at both Janus for yanking him out of POF and Remus for interfering with Thomas' schedule in WTIT. I could see Patton actually getting along mostly fine with Janus, but that would leave Remus without a buddy.

So Remus and Janus it is, which leaves us with the light sides.

And these four bring with them their own set of problems. Roman, for example, could be paired up with Patton, Logan, or Virgil and theoretically any of them should be fine because they're the light sides! They're famILY! They all (mostly) get along! But there's still major unresolved issues between him and Patton from the whole POF debacle, so that leaves Logan and Virgil as potential partners in crime for a fun day. He and Logan would likely have a nice time together considering there's not really any drama between the two at the moment, but that would result in Virgil and Patton being paired up with one another, and from the endcard of WTIT there also seems to be unresolved tension between those two, at least from Virgil's side.

Which just leaves Roman to be paired up with Virgil and Patton with Logan, which obviously is exactly how things worked out in TSNAND.

But my point is that there shouldn't have to be mental gymnastics to figure out how to pair everyone up so that they can all have a nice day; they don't all have to be best friends by any means, but ideally they should all at least get along well enough that randomly mixing and matching everyone would still result in each of them having a good time doing their little activities. That there seems to be One Way and One Way Only to currently pair them up without any major issues speaks volumes about the bigger problems lurking underneath the surface, the sheer amount of tension between all of them, and the untenable strain their relationships with each other are under.

[bonestrouslingbones]

btw one of the things i want to do when i really rap up atbb for real is spontaneously get the energy at will to do actual updated fullbodies of the main 4 since now i actually have the ability to draw them the way they look in my head & have the skills to put some more variety in their shapes. basically i wanna

[skrunksthatwunk]

yakuza: dead souls - american vibes, bigass guns, and why zombies are super weird to have in ryu ga gotoku thematically/ideologically speaking

so i've been playing dead souls recently (hell yeah hell yeah hell yeah) and although i'm having the time of my life with it, there was something about it that kinda felt off to me, and i think i've figured out what it was, but i'm gonna have to walk you through a bit of my thought process to get there.

my first instinct was that it felt... american? and upon further examination i think that boils down to a couple of things:

everyone suddenly has lots of guns and also way way bigger guns

high emphasis on individual heroism (this itself is quite typical for rgg, but it manifests differently here; more on that in a bit)

military/government incompetence, which must be solved by the right individuals having the biggest and bestest guns

[for the sake of transparency i will note that my experience with zombie media is pretty limited and skews american (and i myself am american), so that may create bias. however, the 'this feels american to me' instinct is a rare one for me even in genres where i have seen little/no non-american media, so i think the fact that it did occur to me is notable. what about dead souls triggered that response when little else has? that's why i examined it and, truthfully, i think there's merit in the idea itself.]

the first point is pretty self-explanatory. america's got more guns than it does people, and its gun worship is infamous. japan's ban on guns (aided by its being an island state) means there's far fewer guns in the country, as well as far fewer people with guns (and likely far fewer guns per gun owner, excepting arms dealers/smugglers) than somewhere without such a ban. obviously, there are guns anyway. due to their illegality they are clustered within the criminal population, which explains their presence within organized crime within the series. very few guns will be sitting around in the homes of otherwise law-abiding citizens.

and yet, when the zombie outbreak hits kamurocho, plenty of civilians suddenly have access to quite an arsenal. everyone has the knowledge they need to aim, fire, and reload smoothly and quickly; ammo is infinite for certain guns. characters we've never seen using firearms before suddenly have shotguns under their couches (looking at you, majima). it's not only very different from reality, it's very different from guns' place within the series up until this point, when they were limited weapons used primarily by the enemy.

and they're making a zombie shooter, so of course they would have to do this. it has to be unrealistic to be simultaneously in this setting and in this genre, in the same way that yakuza solving their problems with bareback fistfights instead of guns is itself both unrealistic and necessary to being the kinds of games rgg are.

my point is that this is a kind of focus on and valorization of gun ownership and competency unusual for the series and setting. further, it serves as an argument for why an armed, competent populace is crucial typical in american media.

which brings us to the third point (we'll get to 2 in a minute). guns are often marketed as self-defense weapons. the implication is that the government's defense of the individual (via law enforcement or the military, but particularly the former), are insufficient. this is objectively true. if someone pulls a gun on you at the gas station, will a cop manifest out of thin air to intercede? no. that's impossible. but if you have a gun, or if some bystander has a gun, you or they may be able to do something with that gun to stop the armed person. thus, there is an undeniable gap in the effective immediacy of such responses.

many gun advocates also point to the incompetence or insufficiency of law enforcement, even when they are present to stop an armed aggressor. the fact that law enforcement do not have a 100% success rate in protecting the citizenry is also objectively true.

so, when you are in danger, arming yourself increases your chances of being able to put down (or at least take armed action against) a present or potential threat. whether it is viewed it as a supplement to or a replacement for law enforcement, it is meant to make up for the shortcomings of the government's ability to completely protect all its citizens. it's a safety net for state failure.

back to dead souls. rgg has always centered political corruption in its stories, including politicians, the police, and sometimes even the military, though usually the former two. sometimes this is treated sympathetically (i.e. tanimura, a dirty cop, whose dirty-cop-ness allows him to work outside/against the law to help disadvantaged people, not unlike how kiryu views being a yakuza), and other times it's simply a matter of greed or lust for power (i.e. jingu).

however, something that's almost never touched on so clearly is government incompetence. when the government fails to help people or hurts them or does corrupt things, it's usually due to a competent, malicious bad apple who is removed from power by the end of the game. this implies holes in the system because it keeps happening all the time, but that's on a series-wide scale, a pattern ignored by the series in favor of the individual game solution of "this guy's gone now :) yay".

but in dead souls, the SDF's barracades fall, their men are killed, they are unable to help protect the people outside or inside the quarantine zone. they are weak in a way the government usually isn't in these games. and who is stronger than them? our individual good guys with guns. so we need to be armed because the government is weak and can't protect us. boom. america.

returning to point 2, i'd like to say that dead souls is not particularly more individualistic than any of the other games in the series (other than, perhaps, y7). rgg is an incredibly individualistic series, actually. its protagonists are usually men who defy, oppose, and skirt around the law as a way of helping others and doing what is truly right (with a few exceptions, like shinada and haruka). the romanticized view of the yakuza as a force for helping the community in the face of government incompetence is a real one, and one that tends to manifest itself most in kiryu and how the series treats him. it shows us yakuza who aren't willing to kill, yakuza who cry about honor and justice and humanity and brotherhood, yakuza who never dip their hands into less palatable crimes, or only do with intense regret (and only ever as part of their backstory). the beat-em-up style emphasizes this as well. i mean, what's more individualistic than a one-man army?

put more clearly, this series is about men defying legal and social laws and expectations to live in a way that feels right to them, and about making themselves strong enough to combat those who would get in their way. the individual is placed before the society in importance, (though generally in a way that benefits the community, because they are good guys who want to use that agency and power for good).

all of this is true in dead souls as well, technically. those who live on the outskirts of society are the ones who actually save the day, and the ones who go in there and save people rather than just walling them off and pretending like they don't exist. they have the guns, which are illegal and mark them as criminals, but this broken law is what gives them the power to save themselves when the government will not, and to save their community if they so choose.

where dead souls differs is in the nature of that strength.

rgg places a lot of emphasis on self-improvement, both of one's body and of one's character. do both of these, and you will be strong enough to back up your ambitions. what allows someone to carve their own path in life is the ability to put down ideological and physical resistance by having resolve and the ability to tiger drop whoever won't be swayed by your impassioned speeches. you make yourself a weapon. you make yourself strong. in dead souls, that strength comes from an external, material possession. strength is something you buy (or that you take from someone else). who is able to survive the apocalypse comes not from the heart, nor from rigorous training, but from who has the most, the biggest, and the most bestest guns. it's an intersection of capitalism, militarization, and individualism. simply, deeply american.

[when i was talking myself through this a few days ago, i spent a lot more time on the capitalism + individualism stuff, but i think i'll keep this moving. consider this aside the intermission]

dead souls also differs for a few other interlocking reasons. it can be described with this equation:

zombification of enemies + lethality of guns = loss of emphasis on redemption

if your best friend turned into a zombie, could you shoot them? or your child? or your lover? it's a common trope, but it's a damn good one. watching your family, your neighbors, your town, everyone turn into a husk of themselves, something that looks like them but cannot be reached, is deeply tragic. it's even more tragic when these husks are trying to kill you. unable to be reasoned with and unable to be cured, you must incapacitate them before someone innocent is hurt--or hurt, then themselves made dangerous; each loss adds to the number of threats surrounding you. your life is seen as more valuable than that of your zombified friend, not only because the zombie is attacking you and it's self defense, but because they are no longer a person to you. to be a zombie is to no longer be human; zombification is dehumanization.

and so in a series so focused on connection with one's community, on saving innocent civilians, often on saving kamurocho specifically, one would expect similar tropes to occur. even if one's friends aren't turned, perhaps the cashier at poppo you chat with sometimes is. it's the destruction of that community and of the members one has tertiary relationships with that i expect would occur most within a kamurocho zombie story, since they are likely unwilling to axe anyone more important than that, even if dead souls isn't canon. i'd especially expect to see that in the beginning, before the need to kill zombies rather than contain or redeem them becomes apparent.

this does not happen.

i cannot speak for the entire game, but i can speak of gameplay choices that affect this, and ones i think will not be subverted throughout, even if they are somewhat contradicted by plot events i am presently unaware of.

kamurocho is not a community to protect, nor is it filled with your fellows. it is a playground filled with infinitely respawning, infinitely mow-downable, infinitely disposable zombies. you are meant and encouraged to kill them by the thousands, and never to hesitate or consider whether they may be cured or who may be mourning them. who may be unable to identify their loved one because you were trying to reach a headshot goal from hasegawa. you are not meant to consider them as human, nor beings that were once human, nor beings that could be human again, in the eyes of the zombie shooter. they are merely bodies, targets, and obstacles.

the zombies are contrasted with the true humans, those barricading themselves within the quarantine zone or those living in ignorance outside it. humans are meant to be saved, zombies are meant to be killed. the player character is the only one who can truly help with either of these goals, because the other humans are cowardly, ignorant, or unarmed/helpless. you must be their savior. to be a savior is to eliminate zombies, who are less than human.

the black and white nature of this is also emphasized by another gameplay characteristic: the lack of street encounters. when you traverse the peaceful parts of kamurocho, you are never attacked. you are also never directly attacked by the humans within the quarantine zone. kamurocho feels very different without its muggers and hooligans, but it's because this is a zombie shooter, not a beat-em-up. in a normal rgg title, you'd subdue threats by punching, kicking, and throwing them. you'd use your body in (supposedly) nonlethal ways. dead souls does not have a combat system meant for civilians. you have your guns. you subdue threats by shooting them, preferably lethally. the game doesn't want you to do that to humans, so you never fight humans. this furthers the black and white divide between the salvation-worthy, noble humans and the death-worthy, worthless zombies. combat is only lethal, and only used against the inherent other.

this leads me to the part of dead souls i find most conflicting with the ethos of rgg broadly, and perhaps its greatest ideological/thematic failing.

because the enemy are incurable, dangerous, and inhuman, you must kill them to protect yourself and others, others who are still human. humanity is something that is lost or preserved, but never regained. once someone's gone, they're gone, and you not only must kill them, it is your duty and your right to kill them. you should kill them.

in dead souls, there is no redeeming the enemy.

and that's a big problem.

rgg is about a lot of things, but a key one is the ability of people to change for the better. its most memorable, beloved villains are those who see the light by the end and change their wicked ways (usually through some form of redemptive suicide, though that's another essay in itself). its pantheon of characters is full of those who come from questionable backgrounds struggling to be the best people they can be, to live as themselves authentically and compassionately. it's about the good and the love you can find in the moral and legal gray zones of life/society, and the potential/capacity for good all of us have, no matter how far we may have fallen. it is a hopeful series. it is a merciful series.

this is something bolstered by its gameplay. countless substories are resolved by punching a lesson into someone until they improve their behavior, either out of fear or genuine remorse/development. the games don't just discourage killing your enemies, they don't allow you to (yes, we've all seen the "kiryu hasn't killed anybody? umm. look at this heat action" stuff before, and while they've got a point, i believe it's the narrative's intent that none of this is actually lethal, based on how laxly it treats certain plot injuries (cough cough. y7 bartender) and the actual concept of taking a life, the gravity it is given by the text, particularly when it comes to characters crossing that threshold into someone who has killed. explicit killing is not an option open to you, even when you're being attacked by dozens and dozens of armed men. conflicts are resolved by simply beating up enough guys in this nonlethal manner.

but dead souls is a shooter. to avoid conflict with the series' moral qualms about letting its characters kill, the enemies cannot be human. furthermore, the zombie shooter genre can only fit within the series if its zombies are completely inhuman. this means their pasts as humans cannot be acknowledged, nor the possibility of a cure, nor the characters' own potential conflicts about killing them; or, at least, not in a way that impedes their or the player's ability to gun them down afterwards.

if you can't kill humans in your series, then it cannot be possible to save (in this case, rehumanize) zombies. this is especially true in a game where you are unable to fight humans, and thus human lives are universally more valuable than zombie lives. because if you kill a zombie that can be cured, you are, in a way, killing a human.

and so, in a series where you should always assume your enemies (and everyone, for that matter) are capable of reason, compassion, change, and redemption, and where they are always worth that effort, even if they reject it in the end, dead souls' enemies are irredeemable and only worth swift, stylish slaughter. there are only good guys and bad guys. good guys must be protected, lest they be turned irreversibly into bad guys. good guys are only protected by killing bad guys, and the only way to save good guys is to kill every last one of the bad guys. do not spare them, and do not ask whether or not it's right. only kill.

i love dead souls. it's a silly game. i like seeing daigo in decoy-drag and majima gleefully cartwheeling his way through zombies and ryuji with his giant gun arm prosthetic. it's fun. but when i was trying to figure out what felt off about it to me, one of the words that came to mind (besides american) was indulgent. that, too, felt odd, because i love indulgent media. i am not one to scorn decadent, hedonistic, beautiful high-calorie slop type media. if dead souls was just fan servicey, that wouldn't really bother me. i am a fan and boy do i feel serviced. it rocks. but i think my problem is in what dead souls is indulging.

i think dead souls indulges in the desire to cut loose, and to see these characters cut loose. thing is, they're cutting loose all over kamurocho, and all over the bodies of people they used to (at least in concept) care for. with lethal weapons. it is catharsis via bloodbath, not by pushing your body and mind to the limit in man to man combat, but by pulling a trigger before the other guy can hurt you, or even think about hurting you, for the crime of existing as the wrong kind of thing.

and i just don't think that's in line with rgg's beliefs.

yes, it's probably fair for dead souls' characters to kill zombies. i'm not against that. i'm also not against games letting you do purposeless violence. i spent a good amount of my elementary school years killing oblivion npcs for shits, like. that's not what bothers me about dead souls.

rgg as a series has always taken a hard stance in both its game design and narrative choices against killing and for the potential for redemption in its enemies. and i think the lengths to which it goes to promote that despite the probably-lethal moves you do and the improbability of a harmless do-gooder yakuza is one of the most endearing things about the games. so for this one entry to disregard that key theme for the sake of a genre shift that flopped super hard, well? i dunno. it feels weird i guess. it's out of place not just because it's a dramatic shift in gameplay and style and also zombies are only a thing here (and the supernatural/fantastical are thus only prominent here), but because of what those shifts imply.

so, uh. yeah. my pre-dead-souls thoughts that dead souls wasn't that out of pocket bc rgg's just kinda weird? turns out it was actually super weird to have a zombie shooter in there, but for way way deeper reasons than anyone gives it credit for.

(footnotes in tags)

[vhstown]

for once im actually working on the next part immediately...????

[pikachu-deluxe]

got like 1200 ish lines of code for a thing in like 2 hours yippeee

it's a thing to make it easier to modify stuff for mario kart 64 it'll make my life 1000x easier i just have to enter a few numbers in and out comes a file i can apply to the game with some other program instead of having to copy and paste stuff for like half an hour to an hour every time i want to make changes

a game changer you could say *gets dragged away by the neck like a cat*

[izzy-b-hands]

Putting on last year's trans rigs stream from Drawfee before i have to get ready to go out with my mum and her bf today (bc i have the worst feeling in my gut he's gonna make that An Thing for me if given the chance today, aka whenever i eventually need the restroom while we're at Mystic)

[howcanibesadyetalsoacowboy]

I have a pain playthrough and a therapy playthrough of dark souls

[sysig]

Bad time of it, all things considered (Patreon)