#this is pretty long be warned before opening the tags XD sorry lol

[kuiinncedes]

.

[jackson-t-escobar]

Lick it like Beckham

Note: Welcome to a new snacktime. :) The title is so wrong, I know it. :D But I couldn't think of a better one for the life of me. Might also be a bit inspired by Jonathan Rhys Meyer's role in Kick it like Beckham, lol. :D What a surprise. I don't really like those movies. But the guy is hot. Have fun!

Read the story on AO3 here.

Summary: Ivar intercepts his coach Heahmund in the locker room.

Words: ~ 2.5 k.

Warnings: 18 +, gay smut, blowjob, underage.

Tag buddys: @youbloodymadgenius​ @jadelynlace​ (this is your fault, a bit xD) @dini73​ (your wishes will be up next! *.*) 🖤

A loud and long whistle echoed across the football field; Heahmund called the boys together and waited patiently until everyone had arrived.

"You guys played well today. In next week's game, we'll beat the others for sure. So, off to the showers! Last one out turns out the lights!" he said loudly, looking after his team with a soft smile.

He had always done a lot of youth work and helping the boys' U18 team play soccer was just as much a part of it. Heahmund was always a friendly coach, but could easily lose his cool before particularly important games; even more so since he knew that some of the team might be able to move up to a higher division later on. It was a good squad, and teamwork was a natural part of it. And while the boys went to the locker rooms, Heahmund made sure the place was back in order and put all the things away. And it wasn't until he saw almost all of the team walking out of the locker room again, while they happily waved goodbye to him - that he decided it was time for a shower himself.

With a quiet sigh, he headed for the locker rooms, actually sure that no one else should be there - but he was slightly startled when he walked into the room and found Ivar still sitting there, hair wet and dark from the shower, with only a towel tied around his hips. The boy was equally startled at Heahmund's sudden appearance and took a startled breath - until the white teeth flashed back at him with a smile.

"Sorry, Heahmund. I kinda dawdled a bit today and forgot you had to shower too. I'll hurry, okay?" the boy said with amusement, and Heahmund raised his hands with a light laugh.

"It's all right, you don't have to hurry. Maybe I was just faster than you today, too."

"Maybe. But I think it's more likely that I dawdled," Ivar muttered with a wry grin at the corners of his mouth, and Heahmund sat down a little farther away from him on one of the wooden benches. It took him a moment to notice the way Ivar was looking at him; his bright blue eyes fixed on his trainer.

Heahmund didn't like to lie, and yet he had often had to forbid himself this thought - he found Ivar attractive. He knew it was an absolute taboo subject, and that he would be kicked out of the community if anyone ever read his thoughts... But nonetheless, they were hard to dispel at the sight of the bright eyes and the naked, slightly wet torso. Heahmund raised an eyebrow and smiled softly.

"Are you all right, Ivar?" he asked, and the teen snorted softly and looked down at his socks, which he was already halfway through putting on. For a moment, all that could be heard was the dripping of a leaky faucet from the shower before the boy said softly, "It's all good."

"Really?"

Ivar bit his lower lip. His fingers pulled the white socks higher, and his eyes found Heahmund's again. "I broke up with my girlfriend, that's all. I think it's still heavy in my stomach."

Heahmund remembered her; she had been at a game once, cheering Ivar on. She had been very pretty, long blond hair and a beautiful face. But when Ivar had kissed her briefly, while Heahmund had unconsciously had his eyes on the two of them - he had seen Ivar's eyes drift off to him, amusedly warped, half-open. Like a challenge - and Heahmund had looked away as quickly as he could back then. Watching teens make out - that didn't go over well, even if his hungry dick had possibly imagined that Ivar had deliberately sought that eye contact.

"Sorry about that. Go out, party this weekend. It'll help," Heahmund said quietly, taking off his shirt. After all, he had to shower just as much whether Ivar was still around or not.

He felt Ivar's gaze on his chest, on his upper body. And even though the boy had seen him topless several times, that look tingled Heahmund's skin. It was something else to be topless on the field or at the big guys' soccer game - and another thing when he was alone with a teen in the locker room. It was almost as if there was a certain tension in the air that began to tingle even more with the immersed silence.

"Does it really help?"

"Sure."

"Heahmund, can I ask you something?" Ivar said; when Heahmund met his gaze, the boy bit his lower lip playfully. Soft, as if he were embarrassed, even though those blue eyes spoke a very different language.

"Of course. Go ahead.", Heahmund replied; he was still wearing his black sweatpants and shoes and left them on for now as well. He didn't want to send the wrong signals under any circumstances.

"Do you actually -...well, actually have a girlfriend? You're always seen alone, and even at our party back then by the team, you were alone. Women like you, don't they? I can see that."

Heahmund snorted softly; he turned his gaze to the tiles on the walls, tiled red. Irregular. "What you're paying attention to, Ivar."

"It just caught my eye. You don't look so bad, do you?" Ivar hummed softly, and Heahmund watched closely as the pink tip of his tongue slipped between the full lips. Hungry, that was the word that came to his mind - hungry. That's how he felt, too, and he had to swallow slightly.

"I'm not that interested in it, right now." he replied dryly, rough because his throat felt strange.

"Not interested? Why not?"

A smirk, a smile, and Heahmund threw his shirt in Ivar's face. "Because little teens like you, it's none of your business."

Ivar took the shirt from his face and laughed lightly; his deep blue eyes told something forbidden sweet, and Heahmund had to forbid himself to read fire from them. Yet he saw it. He saw it in the gestures, in the movements. It made him so hot inside that he prayed Ivar would leave now so he could finally take a shower.

But Ivar did not go. He continued to stare at Heahmund, with curious eyes, and then very slightly jutted his chin. Heahmund had always loved Ivar's chin area - that sharp jawline, combined with that fabulous, fresh skin that sometimes reddened after a strenuous game.

"You're gay, aren't you?" Ivar said softly - Heahmund felt his legs go numb from the inside, and all color drain from his face. He flapped his mouth open to say something - but he couldn't. His tongue felt so heavy, and he could only bring himself to look at Ivar with eyebrows drawn together in shock as the teen got up from the bench and squatted in front of Heahmund's body. Blue eyes found his, twinkling with curiosity, almost burning, and Ivar bit his lower lip again. It looked even softer from so close, even more beguiling, and Heahmund clawed his hands lightly into the wooden bench underneath him.

"It's okay. I just know, and I haven't told anyone. Honestly - I deliberately dawdled a little longer today because I... Heahmund, I want to do something.", Ivar hummed beguilingly softly, and his young fingers ran over Heahmund's knees.

"You... Ivar, don't do that. No matter what you have in your head - it won't work, and I don't want it."

Ivar ran his tongue softly and lightly over his lips, then snorted softly. The bright eyes gleamed slightly in the light of the locker room. "You don't want me?" he said softly, and Heahmund leaned his head against the wall behind him.

"I can't. I'm not allowed to do things like that. And that's why I don't want it." he replied; he had to control himself hard, control the dizziness in his body. What was going on here?

"You're allowed to do anything because I won't tell anyone. Heahmund, listen - I don't have anyone to try out on. Whether I want to, whether I am... like you. I've never...", Ivar swallowed the last words, and looked at Heahmund with almost pleading eyes.

Inside Heahmund, everything was spinning. There was Ivar kneeling in front of him, the face of an angel, one of his best players - literally begging him to do something that was absolutely and without question taboo. Heahmund couldn't and wouldn't sugarcoat it either - this was so damn wrong, and he had to stop it. Right now. Before it was too late.

"You need to find someone your own age, Ivar. I'm your coach, I'm almost 32, I can't. I can't and I'm not allowed. Now go, get dressed, and get out." Heahmund deliberately used his harsher tone, but he could almost snap inside when he saw that it didn't have much effect on Ivar. The fingers on his knee crept higher, reaching his thighs.

Heahmund closed his eyes for a moment, snorting softly as Ivar's fingers found the waistband of his sweatpants. His pushing away was too soft, far too weak for real defense. "Don't do that." he murmured darkly, but he felt exactly how the fingers of Ivar's hands pushed deeper into the waistband of his sweatpants, seeking what had already grown hard on him just at that perversely tingling sight of Ivar on his knees: his cock.

"Please let me." Ivar whispered, and his head was so close, so damn close to his lap. Heahmund was still trying to resist the definite move Ivar was making: pulling his sweatpants and shorts down to his ankles as his cock sprang free. Curious, heated fingers clasped it, stroking the hard veins, embracing it with a firm grip.

Ivar had just turned seventeen last month. Heahmund consciously drove that number into his bones, consciously into his mind, as he realized, boiling hot, what he was doing here - and what he was letting himself do. Just letting Ivar stroke his cock was enough to put him in jail, and that bad feeling bored deep into his body, made his heartbeat swell rapidly.

"Ivar, please don't. I'm really getting into the devil's kitchen. I can get into ja... Oh, fuck!" he groaned, murmuring deeply in disbelief, when all at once, and without any warning, Ivar's soft and full lips closed around his cock. He had to gasp, deep and hard, and first come to terms with this unfamiliar sensation. It felt heavenly, forbidden good. So fucking forbidden good that it almost bordered on blasphemy.

Ivar's lips were so soft, and his hot mouth enclosed Heahmund's cock almost perfectly. Of course, the boy was gentle; he didn't know any better, but for Heahmund, all the heat he had lurking in his body shot into his cock with lusty swiftness. His right hand buried itself almost helplessly in the still-wet tips of Ivar's hair, gently supporting the boy's head, which by now was bobbing up and down slightly.

The lips closed tighter around his cock after a while, and the tip of his tongue, which Heahmund had already felt at the beginning, ran playfully over his shaft; the soft lips loosened, but only so that Ivar could lick the tip of his cock with the seductive tip of his tongue, with such a rough and lustful look that Heahmund had to moan slightly.

It was already too late anyway, Heahmund thought to himself as he gently pressed Ivar's head back onto his cock, and the boy took it almost greedily between his lips; it was just too late. Heahmund was already too caught up in the feeling, and far too deep in this frenzy of pure lust. The allure of the forbidden did the rest: Heahmund could remember nothing, really nothing at all, that was hotter than Ivar Lothbrok on his knees in front of him, lustfully sucking his cock. It was such a forbidden erotic thing that he could already feel the tip of his cock tightening slightly with pleasure.

"Ivar..." he murmured darkly, and the teen licked over his cock again; his blue eyes widened slightly, and Heahmund ran his free hand over his slightly flushed cheek. "I'm really close. I can't hold back much longer."

Ivar licked his lips lightly, the pink tip of his tongue finely wetted.

"That's a good thing. I'm so hot for you, Heahmund..." the boy sighed, and before he could say anything else, the teen had turned his attention back to his cock and was sucking it deep into his mouth.

Heahmund closed his eyes, allowing the racing of his heart and the adrenaline in his body. "Fuck, I'm about to cum..." he moaned, trying to regulate himself with an exhale and a sharp bite on his lower lip; but everything about this situation was far too delightful, far too violent for him. He felt like a fucking pervert, like a sicko, as he said softly, "I want to cum on your face."

His hand tugged lightly at Ivar's wet hair, and he immediately fell in love with the look in Ivar's eyes, the lust-reddened face as he gently pulled it back. The boy's lips had opened softly, ever so gently, as he settled down slightly, looking up at Heahmund and watching him climax with frantic movements in front of Ivar's face. It wasn't long before a harsh moan escaped Heahmund's lips, and he held Ivar's head tightly before he came hot and trembling on his face.

Ivar's face seemed more beautiful than ever, as Heahmund saw the first drops on the hot reddened skin, as he saw the little tongue lick up a drop of his load, curiously taking it between his lips. And never did his hungry eyes leave Heahmund, and the beautiful face was something that Heahmund had marked deep inside as his.

He had to force himself to sit down a bit to beat the dizziness in his head; he felt more exhausted than after any game, than after any practice. And it didn't get any better when Ivar sat down on his lap with a fluid motion, putting his hands to the sides of Heahmund's face.

"Can you make me come, too?" the teen whispered softly and gently, and before Heahmund could even exhale, his impossibly beautiful lips had already settled on Heahmund's, making him taste his own pleasure, making him tremble completely hypersensitive. But his hands closed tightly around Ivar's waist, and he deepened the kisses with a gentle nudge that the two exchanged hotly on the bench.

He was guaranteed to go to jail, he knew that.

He knew that after he came on Ivar's beautiful face - he knew that when he removed the towel from Ivar's hips, as he took the hard and wonderfully slick cock in his hand for the first time. And he knew he was going to end up in hell as well, when at some point his head burrowed between Ivar's legs, exploring the most beautiful and youngest body he had ever had underneath him.

[chaoticspacefam]

The Lana Shipping Meme!

This is a meme made by @swtor-legacy-sitcom​ who very kindly tagged me to fill it in, thank you! :D This was super fun, I’ve been in a bit of a writing rutt lately so this was a nice way to sort-of dip my toe back into it :P I TOTALLY forgot this was in my drafts and forgot to schedule it to post, I’m soooo sorry it took so long lmao 😳😬

I’m not sure if we’re supposed to tag other people with this one so I’ll just leave a general, open tag here: if you have a Lana ship and want to fill this one out, feel free to yoink the meme and say I tagged you! Yes, I promise I mean you <3

Spoilers for KOTFE/KOTET, and slight spoilers for the Subterfugeverse “version” of said events, will be discussed below, so be aware of that before proceeding! There’s also some midlly nsfw questions so you might wanna skip those if they’re not your thing! :D Under a cut because it’s long, but no trigger warnings need apply.

Is Lana Beniko absolutely done with their shit?

Oh yes, absolutely. Nearly always. At any given time, BUT Lana wouldn’t have it any other way. Saarai may be a reckless, overly-heroic idiot with seemingly no self-preservation, but she’s Lana’s reckless, overly-heroic idiot, ya know :’D

Do they make jokes together?

Fairly often, yes! Theirs is very much a flirty/fond banter type of relationship. Lana tells her she’s insufferable, Saarai rolls her eyes and snarks back, so on. See:

Saarai: Well this was a stupid idea Lana: Considering it was one of yours, I’m not surprised Saarai: Why didn’t you say something? Lana: I did and you did it anyway. And what have we learnt from this? Saarai, quietly: I’m a dumbass and I should listen to you more.... Lana: Good. I still love you, though. Saarai: :’D

Lana, two minutes later: You’re going to do it again, aren’t you? Saarai: Yeah, probably.

as well as that little cutscene “You’d better come back blah blah blah” “Well I have you to rescue me, that’s all I need~” is their default pre-dangerous battle banter :P

Who’s hornier? (who initiates)

Saarai is definitely hornier, and while she’s not always the one to initiate, she’s definitely the one to ask more often. (if I had to give it a number, prolly something like 65/45 lol) One of these days, Lana’s going to buy a spray bottle /jk

Kinkiest they’ve been?

Not awfully. Saarai’s a biter (Lana likes it, don’t worry 😏) and she loves it when Lana pulls her hair, but other than that, and making use of connections within the Force to heighten the sensations during such activities ;) they’re pretty vanilla

There was a post going around a while back about an alternative to a praise kink that was like, a “reassurance” kink, instead. I can’t find the actual post to link to it and I haven’t pinned down any specifics for them yet but I definitely think that’s a Saarai thing to look into later 😏

Has Lana ever covered up something your OC did as Minister of Intelligence?

In a roundabout way, yes. Technically, Saarai’s entire existence on Rishii. Since, teeechhnically, as far as the Empire’s concerned at that point, Rai’s supposed to be dead. Lana doesn’t know the technicalities of why that is (and Saarai isn’t comfortable telling her, even now), but she knows it’s important, so she does it for her even if she doesn’t know why.

Favorite non sexual downtime activity?

Cuddles! Saarai is a cuddlebug, and while Lana enjoys them she’s definitely not the “if I don’t get cuddled x times a day I can’t go on” type (in my headcanon, ofc, I’m not saying she can never be that way!) but, Saarai’s also very warm and cuddling her is cozy, so it’s something they both enjoy, whether Rai’s the big spoon, or - and this is Rai’s favourite thing ever - Saarai putting her head in Lana’s lap so Lana can play with her hair, it’s something they always do at the end of the day when they’re both done with work.

Mushiest thing Your OC has ever done for Lana?

So, I’m too impatient & lazy to do the actual HK missions in-game, but I know you can technically get another HK unit, so because ✨it’s my fanfic and I get to make the rules✨ Saarai sent Aria (my DS! Jedi Shadow, very good at stealth) back to Zakuul and though it was a bit battered up, she managed to retrieve HK’s processor. They had to get him a new chassis, but Koth and Ty managed to salvage the rest of his “important” bits and they rebuilt HK for her after they settled on Odessen :’3

Most Embarrassed Lana has ever been because of your OC?

In the middle of an important meeting, in front of everyone on the Alliance High Council, including Theron, Senya, Ni’kasi, Vano, etc.

Lana, sarcastically, after they’ve been disagreeing on how to handle a particular matter for ~1 hr: hahaha bite me.

Saarai, dead serious: Okay, where? 😏

Lana was mortified, to say the least XD

That thing that happened that they vow to NEVER speak of?

Saarai’s reaction when they went to Nathema. Rai’s psychometric, and in hindsight she realises putting her hand on that wall as she ducked into the building was a mistake. She was bombarded with flashback after flashback of what had happened on Nathema when it was still Medriaas, the planet where she was born and where most of her family died, it was not a pleasant experience for her and Rai actually collapsed at one stage because it was all too much for her ;w;

Lana had to bring her back around and herd her back on the ship, where Rai had to wait because she just couldn’t go any further, and Lana and Vano had to go on alone. Lana agreed not to tell anyone else about what had happened, because Saarai didn’t want any of them to worry about her, or think she was “weak” because of it.

The Angriest they’ve ever been at each other?

There’s actually two instances that come to mind for this one

1) Koth’s betrayal/stealing of the Gravestone, Lana was pissed at Koth and wanted to take it out on him, Saarai was pissed at the situation and got between them and chewed Lana out for taking it out on him. (Subterfugeverse is kinda complicated, there’s two Commanders calling the shots for different parts of the Alliance, Koth took issue with something Vano did and made the reckless, kinda stupid decision to still steal the Gravestone even tho Saarai didn’t do anything. (also for anyone new to the blog, all three of them are dating, they’re polyam ;)) Lana took it personally, Saarai was more upset that he was upset and didn’t say anything before he did something stupid. Rai and Lana butted heads about how to deal with it, Lana got salty cause she got yelled at, but they ofc fix it later :3)

2) Torian’s death. Saarai had tried to warn Lana what would happen if they split Vette & Torian up during that fight, Lana brushed it off and told Rai to “stop overreacting, it will be fine”. Obviously, it was not fine. Rai was very angry at the result because, I quote, “I WARNED YOU! And you wouldn’t listen to me!” Saarai refused to speak to Lana for a few days after that, it was kinda a rough time for Lana, she’s only seen Rai get that angry a few times, and only once at her so it shook her a bit. 😢

How does both Lana, and your OC initiate the ‘fade to black’ ;)

For Saarai, the “indicator” is usually when her kisses start to become 50/50 between kissing and biting/nibbling. That’s the universal “ok I want to” signal for Rai. Usually very quickly followed by a soft “yes?” or “are you sure?”, either against her skin or into her ear, depending on where she’s kissing at the time; because she’ll always check first, and if Lana says “no”, it’s off, because Lana’s consent is more important than any of her feelings.

For Lana, it’s when she’ll let Rai pick her up and/or usually to pin her to a wall. There’s a decent height difference, Saarai’s 6 ft 3, and I headcanon that while Lana’s not necessarily “short” at around 5 ft 8, she’s considerably smaller than Rai, as well as being more “reserved” with PDA, she’ll hold hands, or kiss her on the cheek etc. in front of other people, but otherwise Lana tries to keep somewhat “professional” while they’re at work. So when she starts climbing her like a tree, Rai knows she’s about to get some. XD

Do they have kids?

Kiiiinddd of? It’s complicated. Saarai has a son, Ty, from a previous relationship. Lana & Koth both sort of step up to help co-parent, but since Sith Purebloods age differently (i.e. they’re adults at ~20ish the same as humans, but after that they’re more like elves and their physical aging slows down, so they’re more long-lived), even though Ty’s very young by Pureblood standards, he’s still 60 years old, so he’s technically older than Lana and it’s kind of awkward for him to actually call her mom even if she kind of acts like one. He accidentally called her “mom” once, it was very awkward for both of them XD

What has been the most protective Lana has ever had of said kid?

I sat and scratched my head for ages trying to think of something to answer this question with, but I’m very sad to say that right now at the time of answering this meme, I don’t have any specific scenes planned out to tell you about! :( But rest assured that Lana absolutely would rush to help Ty if it was ever necessary :D

House pets? Is your Lana a dog person, or Cat person?

Funnily enough, they don’t actually have any pets! I’d like to think of Lana as more of a cat person than a dog person, in my personal opinion. But they have yet to get any pets of their own, maybeee later on, I dunno. Haven’t hit on any solid ideas for them yet, but I feel like if they happened upon a cute kitty they definitely could adopt one at some stage :’3

Do they get freaky on the Alliance Base or in the Shuttles?

They’ve done both, to be honest lol. Thankfully, Saarai’s sneaky enough that they haven’t gotten caught doing it, yet. Thank the Force.

Are their Sparring Matches Flirtatious? Hardcore?

They could go either way, it depends on what kind of mood they’re both in. If Lana’s particularly annoyed (usually not at Rai, but sometimes) then it’s more likely to be a hardcore spar, Rai’s a pretty tough cookie so she’ll often offer to be Lana’s punching bag in order to spare them some repair bills so she doesn’t rip apart the training dummies irrepairably, it’s okay, Rai can take it ;)

But if they’re both in an otherwise good mood and are just sparring for practise sakes, then yes, they often very quickly devolve into flirtacious banter and some of the classics, you know, “okay you win, you can let me go now” “mmm, nah” “I thought we were sparring” “do you want me to stop” “...don’t you dare.” etc. :’D

Class Specific things that play into their relationship?

Saarai’s a Juggernaut, and I headcanon Lana’s probably some sort of Sorcerer, so they tend to fight as such. They cover each other in more ways than one, if you want to get to Lana you have to go through Saarai first (and good luck to you, that woman can take and give a fucking beating lmao). Lana picks off whatever Saarai’s saber misses, usually with Force attacks but sometimes with her saber, too. Saarai takes bullets for Lana so Lana doesn’t have to get hurt. Lana yells at Rai for doing that and then fixes her up with Force healing afterwards, rinse and repeat. :’D

When they do argue, Lana tends to spontaneously manifest Force lightning, Saarai’s used to it and doesn’t bat an eyelid, she knows Lana’s not actually going to throw it at her and she’s more than prepared to dodge any stray bolts that do come her way.

Lana’s the tactician and the ground support, Saarai’s the battering ram/the bigass hammer used to clear space when Lana needs a bit of extra “oomph” (and trust me, they’re usually never far apart. The other one will be there and then you’ll be in trouble lmao)

Describe a time your OC went ‘Full beast mode’ to protect Lana, instead of the other way around?

"Kriff. Koth, what happened?” Three words was all it took, and everything made sense: “They hurt Lana.”

That scene in the Endless Swamps on Zakuul, just before they pull the Gravestone out of it and Lana and the Commander get ambushed. Saarai went with Lana & Koth to break Vano out of carbonite (since Saarai was still on Rishii at the time, she doesn’t get frozen, only Vano) so when they split up, Saarai goes with Koth to look for ship parts while Vano goes with Lana to look for water.

Lana and Vano get ambushed by the Knights/Skytroopers, and Lana’s hand gets busted. It takes Saarai and Koth a little while to rush over there to help them, but when they do

Saarai. Goes. Fucking. Feral. It’s the scariest she’s ever been in front of Lana and Lana will never forget it, they almost didn’t really need Senya’s help for that part, Saarai basically had it covered. I imagine Lana later described it as “kind of hot, but also kind of terrifying, actually”

Saarai’s considered Chaotic Good, so generally speaking if there’s a peaceful, non-violent solution to a problem, she’ll opt for that, but she has a few buttons that you just do not want to push, ever. And hurting her partners is one of those buttons. She will go apeshit and that’s exactly what happened in the swamp lmao

Little things couples do to annoy each other. What does Lana do? What does your OC do?

Saarai likes to wake up early and hide Lana’s kaf mug in increasingly ridiculous places. Once, she even got Koth to help her stick it to the top of the Gravestone’s hull. It took Lana half the morning to find it, Lana was not amused. XD

Saarai and Koth also have an ongoing “terrible puns” contest where they basically see who can annoy Lana with the most ridiculous puns possible, see this post for an example :P Lana wonders where/how they keep coming up with these puns, she really does.

Does Lana get jealous in your headcanon?

Not really! In Subterfugeverse, both Rai and Lana are polyam, so generally speaking, jealousy isn’t a problem for them, and when it is it’s more of a case of “hey. Hey. Hey, I’m not getting enough attention, pay attention to me.” and then it’s usually dealt with and all is well ;)

When Lana meets Anri, the only thing Saarai does is tease her about “when she’s going to make the move”. 😜

Story that is prominent in their relationship?

I was gonna draw a little doodle for this but the poses kept not coming out right so I gave up, sorryyy qAq

I haven’t gotten very far into planning the SoR onwards+ segments of Subterfugeverse, just bits and bobs like this, but I’d say for now the most prominent is probably their first meeting on Rishii. Basically, meet-cute but with a lightsaber involved too hahaha. There was a lot of posturing and flirty subtext right from the get-go with these two, even if Saarai was particularly suspicious at first (see the earlier question about her being technically dead to the Empire). At first, when she noticed Lana tailing Ty (because Lana was extremely confused about why a Pureblood was so far from Sith space ;)), Saarai assumed that something had happened to her twin and the Empire had A) found out she and Ty were still alive and B) Sent Lana to track them down and kill them for good. Several tension-loaded hours later and Lana managed to convince Rai that actually, Ni’kasi was fine and speaking of, she was trying to avoid being killed too so maybe, actually, they could help each other. And that was all she wrote <3

[tsubaki3192]

250+ Follower HCs! Spending Time With Their Kids [Nobunaga, Kenshin, Yukimura

Requested by: @nad-zeta​

Aww Thank you so much Love! <3 

Yuki added on her request! :3

Warnings: .... YUki’s became crack I’m so sorry... so I’m putting that at the beginning lol

Tags underneath cut! Let me know if you wanna be (un)tagged! :3

------------------

Yukimura:

a…. Girl?

Hmm… I dunno. Haven’t put much thought into this one. But it’d be funny if his child was a girl.

He… Doesn’t know how to react to his baby girl.

Maybe it’s bc he has no idea how to treat her, but when she’s a baby, he does talk and interact with her more

Okay, let’s timeskip to the future and your daughter is now…. 7.

Yukimura probably has a tendency to avoid girls other than MC, and I think that also goes with his daughter… Not because he doesn’t like her, but because he has no idea how to care for her.

She grows up with a ton of toys… But….

QUESTION WHY ‘Daddy won’t spend time with me’

YOU’RE LIVID- Tbh, I would smack him for that and Shingen or Sasuke wouldn’t even be able to hold her back, and Kenshin would be impressed….

He does end up spending time with her tho.

It’s awkward at first

And then he opens up, even if he’s grumbling about the messy makeup and mess at the end of the day.

It’s not surprising that since Yuki wasn’t in her life, she usually goes to Shingen for help bc he’s been so open

Yuki actually cries at that, but only with you… there was this one time she actually caught him crying, so she started crying and it became this mess of “Stop crying” “no u-”

They bond pretty quickly after that lol

LOts of outings and helping Yuki to sell goods :3

Any piggy backs

Yes.

Lots of piggy backs

He has become so cute wtf

Kenshin: 

A boy…. then a girl... I think.

So I stan an overprotective father here for his daughter, in the very least.

That’s not because his son is ‘too weak’- It’s the fact that culturally and in that time period, he’s supposed to be the stronger one.

Kenshin teaches him the art of sword-fighting from the age of 5, but soon realises that he’s much more into Senbon and, well… Flowery stuff. It’s good, in a way, since his son has quite the feminine face shape and your eyes. It’s a very good thing, actually. He’d make a successful ninja- 

So that’s what he becomes, xD 

Together with Sasuke, Kenshin trains him in the art of ninja skills. It’s significantly more interesting to him, maybe because you’ve told him random stories you’ve read from your time. 

There’s fluff time too- You pretty much bring all the warlords together and teach them how to sew. Yuki too, because Shingen and you have told him it’s the exact same thing as sewing a wound and practice is good.

Kenshin’s baby girl is a complete treat to the whole family.

You know she’s bound to be spoiled in the same way as you- With probably twice as much gifts as he gives you, and his special fatherly-love.

“I hope you remember she’s a baby, Kenshin… No stop- A dagger isn’t suitable for a baby-”

So it’s a lot of cooing, playing with toys given to her by both Shingen and Kenshin and cuddles… 

YES CUDDLES ARE EVERYTHING-

Ironically or not, the boy also becomes protective of his mother and his younger sister, no matter how young he is. He’s spent quite a bit of time with Kenshin, after all.

Ngl, but I think when the girl is older, she’s not gonna like the over-protectiveness. So expect a lot of ninja work by her brother, joined by Sasuke bc Kenshin doesn’t trust everyone to be safe xD

She still, notices them tho….

*Cue scolding by Daughter bc of of irritation*

MC does nothing to help bc they honestly deserved it xD

Nobunaga: 

A son… I mean what did you expect?

So Nobunaga and his son are the most endearingly domineering… pair?

I mean your son’s personality stems directly from Nobunaga, despite having your looks and that does make you wonder why, since you spend the most time with him.

Nobunaga’s probably the busiest man on Earth. So when he does find time to spend with his son, they’re the most mischievous pair. You’re not even surprised when Masamune joins in one day, with Mitsuhide just chucking away at the sight.

Hideyoshi doesn’t even try when they get to this messy point, and to be fair neither do you. If you stopped them, they’d casually rope you into the mess.

You’ve long learnt to leave them be when they’re like this.

You pretty much take over the castle when they’re playing- Can’t have the castle’s structure falling apart because of a handful of idiots, right?

Hideyoshi still hasn’t learnt his lesson, it seems-

The two of them are always thieving konpeito from the kitchens and screwing around the castle in the most ridiculous ways.

You swore they had somehow once gotten hold of some black paint (or was that charcoal?), only to end up fully covered in the colour…

You only found out after nearly giving Nobunaga a back massage- His back was COVERED in the pigment. Obviously, your son had dropped a handful and some down his clothes and back.

Honestly? You just sighed at their antics and dragged him by the ear to the bathhouse. And you can’t even say anything when he drags you in, fully clothed.

When Nobunaga does spend time with his son, the adrenaline and joy just lasts until the following morning when he’s slept it off. It’s very different from the type of adrenaline from war- Less stress and fear, and more joy and… out of control actions.

So expect an extremely hyper Nobunaga when you both retire to your bedroom…

Mitsuhide: 

A girl. I don’t budge. … Okay, maybe a baby boy in the future, but for now? Just a baby girl.

So Mitsuhide’s one of those ‘I-never-expected-to-be-this-happy’ or ‘I-never-expected-to-one-day-have-a-family-of-my-own’ warlords.

So when you announce you were having a baby, he just… freezes. Like one of those signature ‘holy-crap-what’ freezes. 

He’s so silent you swore you broke him. But when you reach out to press a hand against his cheek, he turns, presses a deep, loving kiss to your palm. He’s exceptionally gentle with you now as he draws you to his chest, thanking you for every miracle you’ve given him.

So I also headcannon that Mitsuhide’s the epitome of practicality y’all… Like he’s so busy he doesn’t have time for anything he deems ‘useless’... or will he buy things that will never be used.

So expect some gender-neutral toys and tiny clothes for your young one, even before she’s born.

Did I mention he’s also quite protective of you? That doubles or triples when he finds out you’re pregnant. And again, when he finds out it’s a girl after birth.

Literally. It has to be either him or Kyubei with you and the ‘little one’. AT ALL TIMES.

Mitsuhide’s the only one he’ll allow to care for the your- and his- daughter when you’re busy with something. On occasion, it’s Kyubei, but it does mean that he and his daughter must be in the same room.

More than often, this ends up with Mitsuhide being W E A K for his daughter’s laugh and dropping his work- That can always be finished later, after all.

Dress up. Make up. Toys. Games. Anything. Mitsuhide would literally kill for some time with his daughter.

When she was younger, Mitsuhide used to cradle her against his chest, whispering sweet stories or singing to her as she giggled from the vibration of his low voice.

Now that she’s older, he spends his time with her carefully. Teaching her with gentle teasing- Something she’s become accustomed to 

NGL, but Kyubei ends up being her ‘older brother’ figure when she grows up.

The look on Mitsuhide’s face when she says she wants to marry Kyubei is gold.

Just don’t let Masamune hear okay?

Tagging: @tsuki-no-usagiii​ @unstoppablelinda​ @zavannahmj​ @nad-zeta​ @thesirenwashere​ @ikemenmitsuhide​ @choi-jiyu​ @nuttytani​

[bellatrixobsessed1]

Okay so tumblr did something super weird with the formatting and I couldn’t fix it; for some reason it had the page cut under the ask itself (as if the ask itself had the page cut in it) so I literally couldn’t edit it out and re-format it right. So I just took a screencap of the ask and I’ll respond via a standard textpost.

Gonna give a little warning because I’m gonna be talking about child abuse a bit.

Glad to hear it, anon. :) I try to keep an open mind with these discussions.

Tbh, I kinda get uncomfortable with some of the stuff I've seen in her tag regarding Zuko especially. I've seen a handful of people kind of dismissing him as being whiny or sensitive, and I just don't really vibe with that. I don't have anything against any of the people I've seen posting it, but I just don't vibe with.

I'm also gonna take the opportunity to try to break some of the misconceptions about the Azula fandom by saying that I don't feel afraid or intimidated to kinda go against a good portion of the fandom in a sense. And that's because, fellow Azula fans have never really outcast me or tried to fight me for saying that I think that Azula's a bit of an abuser. The Azula fandom imo, isn't full of bullies and hateful people; everyone I have talked to has been very open to a nice discussion. I think that it just depends how you approach them with your arguments.

All of that said, Imma get back on topic here; It’s a little tough to talk about Azula's flaws sometimes because I feel like (though, thankfully this hasn’t happened on tumblr to me yet) that some people take pointing out flaws in your faves as bashing them or posting hate.

But honestly this is really cool to hear because back when I first opened up this blog I used to do that thing where I’d justify everything that my faves did, which was a bit of a problem because my faves are all antagonists! xD So there has been a lot of progress made.

I think that there are three main reasons that people have a hard time admitting that she’s an abuser too.

I think that the biggest one is that a lot of Azula fans lately have been massively on the defensive. There has been quite a bit of hate in her tag, there have been things said by the writers (taken the wrong way or not), there have been a lot of generalizations, and so on. And all of it kind of puts fans on the defensive. I see so many posts about how Azula is irredeemable and just the worst, most evil character in the show and so people kind of swing hardcore the other way (Azula did nothing wrong) to make up for all of the demonizing she gets. One extreme usually leads to another. Seeing Azula get so much shit, like being called a killer and a sadist, provokes the Azula is a cinnamon roll reaction. Basically when a fandom gets put on blast for being 'the crazy' or 'mean' side of the fandom, I feel like it creates a cycle where that part of the fandom starts to actually act meaner because they feel backed into a corner. The more they are called 'delusional' for seeing good in Azula the more radically they will start to defend that belief until the shades of grey start disappearing, if that makes sense.

But this is just a theory of course.

The second reason I think that people tend to dismiss the things she does do wrong is that there's this association with criticism and hate. And this goes beyond the Avatar fandom. In general I feel like people find it hard to say bad things about their favorite characters because they feel like they're bashing their character and/or they don't want people to think that they are being negative. Plus it's just kinda hard to say bad things about something you like/love. Speaking as someone who used to do this; I always felt really weird about or like I was being negative when admitting that things I like have flaws. I'm not exactly sure why I used to feel like this because it wasn't an, 'I seem myself in this character, so insulting them is like insulting me' thing because I usually have almost nothing in common with my faves. Idk, it's just always been way easier for me to find things I like in a character I hate than it is for me to find things I don't like in a character that I do. On a personal level, it might just be because I'd rather focus on liking things that I like than hating things that I hate?

I guess that I think that it's just easy to forget that 'I don't like xyz aspect of Azula' is not the same as 'I don't like Azula at all'. I think that it's possible to love a character but not love everything about them, just like real people; you can love your mom to death but there will always be those things about her that drive you nuts.

And really, imo, I think that fans who are able to see flaws with their faves are the ones who understand them the best. I'm definitely not saying that the people who don't see/acknowledge their fave's flaws don't understand their fave. But I think that they are missing out on very crucial aspects of their favorite character. If you like a character you should like them for what they are in canon, not what you want them to be or what they could be.

I see a lot of potential for growth in Azula. I see potential for a redemption arc and I do love what her character can be. But I also love her character as is. Currently in canon, she's manipulative and goal driven to the point where she has a disregard for people. Currently she's an antagonist and I love her for that. Because antagonist, unredeemed Azula is the character I liked in the beginning. I don't condone her being manipulative and I don't like that as a personality trait. But I do love it as far as, she is a fantastically written antagonist. And those cold, manipulative, abusive traits add to her complexity when juxtaposed against her own abuse, insecurities, and need to be loved.

And that's kind of what I mean when I say that, if you like Azula, you should like her despite the flaws.  If that makes sense. I feel like people who say that she isn't an abuser (at least to some degree) kind of have a misunderstanding of her character. I think that one of the points of her character is to show that some abused kids don't come out okay. It's a tragic reality.

But with Azula I think that there's still room for her to change and start to break that cycle. I feel like she'd have a much harder time doing it than Zuko, because she has been subjected to his mental abuse in close range for much longer than he has. And I think that it would be something she'd struggle with her whole life, but I see good in her.

That said, I think that the third reason people have trouble seeing her as an abuse is because it is just really hard to see abuse victims become the abuser. I've mentioned before, but I come from a family where the chain ended with one of my parents. Said parent has told me many times how hard it was to fight that kind of upbringing. That's the real tragedy of abuse, it just goes on and on until you're mentally strong enough to fight yourself and break that chain. And the sad thing is, that some people just can't seem to do that. And I think that when discussing Azula, this comes into play a bit; it's just hard to look at even a fictional abuse victim and knowledge that they've become the abuser because it is all that they have known.

It's just a really hard topic and  that's why it's so easy for discourse like this to get heated; a lot of people have an Azula in their lives or relate to her in some way.

Thanks for the ask, sorry it took so long to reply! I wanted to make it thoughtful and word everything the best that I can.

As always, everyone is welcomed to chime in and give their own opinions.

EDIT: There are a few things that I don’t think I was clear enough on with the initial post lol. First and foremost, I’m definitely not saying that these three reasons are the only reasons people don’t talk about Azula’s flaws. @wingsfreedom​ made a good point about differing ways of interpreting scenes. That’s another biggy. 

The other thing I want to clarify is that I don’t think that Azula is a full on abuser. I think that she displays tendencies and does some abusive things. But I also don’t put her on the same level as Ozai. I feel like she’s a bit more merciful than him. Like Ozai is pretty much too far gone; he’s an abuser and his mind is set there. Azula, I think still has the capacity to break the chain. She’s not a lost cause. I also feel like she can be reasoned with more than Ozai. Ozai is all about power; Azula is motivated more by desperation (be it for her father’s love, to keep the last bit of control she has, and to keep her friends). It still leads to that harmful behavior, but I don’t think that she’s a lost cause like Ozai. Like, she has some abusive tendencies now, but I can also see her being able to break the chain under the right conditions.  If that makes sense. 

[jiminthestreets-bonesinthesheets]

Pas De Deux - Chapter 2

Title: Pas De Deux

Fandom: Supernatural

Pairing: Destiel 

Rating: not really needed for this fluff lol

Tags: fluff, pretty much just a whole lot of fluff XD

Summary: Dean is a closeted ballet dancer, and Cas is playing the Nutcracker Prince in the Kansas State Ballet. When the ballet loses their Clara and Cas confronts Dean about taking the part along side him, will he be able to put aside his fears and let everyone know who he really is? All to help the man of his dreams?

MASTERLIST

AO3

*** My works are not to be posted on any sites without my permission! But comments and reblogs are love! <3 Please and thanks!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter Two

     Since the first night Dean had danced with Cas, it was all he could think about. The intensity of their chemistry, even after only a few hours, was a feeling he would never forget, and one he had never known. It became something he craved all day long when he wasn't at the studio, and weekends were pure torture for him. And every night after the first night, when Dean would sneak his way into the dance studio, rather than going upstairs to his usual room, he had started going straight to Cas's practice room on the first floor. 

    The two of them practiced together every night for almost a month, and with every night not only did Dean's dancing improve, but so did their unspoken bond. They could both feel it. And by the end of the month, they had just about made it to the last dance between Clara and the Nutcracker. A dance Dean was very much looking forward to, especially since it called for a great deal of intimacy between the two leads. He was anxious to dance it with Cas, and they were almost there. 

     It was nearing almost three in the morning by this point, the two of them were sweaty and sore and all danced out for the night, so they decided to pack it in. Dean had to get home anyways, Sam would be waking up very soon and the last thing he needed was his little brother asking questions. 

     Cas walked over to his bag as Dean sat back against the mirror at the front to take off his shoes. He grabbed two bottles of water out of his bag and tossed one to Dean. 

     "Heads up!" Dean caught it, giving him a nod in thanks, before opening it and practically downing it in one go. Cas walked over to sit beside him, and decided now was as good a time as any to ask. "So Dean, we have stage rehearsals at the theater tomorrow night, so I won't be here to practice with you." He could see the disappointment Dean tried to hide, and hoped that it was a good indication that he would get the answer he was hoping for. "I was wondering if you'd like to come to the theater tomorrow night, sit in and watch the rehearsal. The doors are guarded while we are in there rehearsing, but I can leave your name with security if you would like to come."

     "I would actually love to come and watch!" He nodded enthusiastically, "It's been so long since I've been to the theater to see a performance, and I would love to see you in action with actual professionals."

     Cas nearly sighed in relief, he was so hoping Dean would say yes. "Great! Rehearsals don't start until seven tomorrow night, so come any time after that."

     Dean just smiled, took off his shoes, and hurried out of the studio. He just wanted to get through tomorrow so he could go to the theater and watch Cas.

~~~~~~~~~~~

     Dean was sitting in the parking lot of the theater, had been for the last fifteen minutes. He was excited to watch Cas dance with the ballet, but he was also super nervous to be there. What if someone saw him, told his mom or brother that he was hanging around the theater. But after a few more minutes of deep breathing, he finally gathered up enough courage to practically run across the parking lot, praying that he wouldn't be caught. But his urge to see Cas seemed to be out weighing that little bit of fear, that and the thought of seeing Cas on stage. 

     When he made it to the front doors to the theater, he was very quickly stopped by the guard placed there. A very large, burly man who almost growled at him, "Sorry, Sir, you can't be here. Rehearsals are going on at the moment."

     "Actually I was invited here tonight," he shifted nervously from foot to foot as the guard stared him down," Castiel Novak said he would leave my name with you, it's Dean Winchester."

     The guard held up a finger to him, then turned a few steps away from him to speak quietly into a mouth piece on his jacket. After a few agonizing moments and the sudden worry that maybe he should just turn and run, he finally turned back to him. "Dean Winchester, you said?"

     Dean nodded. 

     "Got some ID?"

     He nodded again and hurriedly rifled through his wallet for his driver's license, holding it out for the guard to look at. Once he was satisfied, he pushed the door open and held it for Dean, "Go on in, just try to be quiet and sit wherever you'd like. Enjoy."

     He nodded at the man as he walked by, practically ran past him and into the theater, quickly finding his way to the stage and quietly going inside. He was hit instantly by the all too familiar music he and Cas had been practicing to all month, and crept slowly to the front row to sit and watch as they finished the scene. 

     His eyes were fixed on Cas the entire time the dancers moved around the stage. He looked amazing up there, powerful, completely in his element and owning every inch of the stage with every move he made. It was hard not to watch him. 

     They finished the dance a few minutes later and the directors rushed the stage to chat with the dancers. Cas took that moment to finally glance towards the seats and saw Dean. He gave him a smile and a small wave, which Dean returned both.

     A few minutes later the directors called for everyone to get back to their places and rerun the scene. 

     Everything was going great. The dancers were hitting every step perfectly on cue, everyone was expertly coordinated, and Cas looked great as hell. Until suddenly things took a hard right mid dance. 

     The girl playing Clara stumbled halfway through the dance and nearly fell flat on her ass center stage. Cas tried to reach out and steady her but she just angrily pushed him away and shouted to stop the music. 

     "Stop! Stop everything!" The music paused and the entire hall went silent as she then rounded on Cas, throwing her hands in the air and yelling, "Seriously, Castiel, you messed up the steps again?! Am I expected to work with amateurs my entire life?!"

     Cas merely rolled his eyes and in his regularly calm voice answered, "I wasn't the one who confused the steps, Ruby. You should be at least a foot ahead of me, you're too close, which is why you keep stumbling."

     She scoffed and crossed her arms, "Just like you to blame it on me. You think you're the best dancer here just because you practice night and day, you think you're better than us."

     "Castiel is right, Ruby," the director stepped in, "you're too close to him. This whole thing could be fixed if you just take one step forward."

     "Why is this utter fiasco being blamed on me?!" She turned on the director. "Why don't you tell your precious golden boy here to properly learn the steps!"

     "No one is blaming you for anything. It's an easy fix, just one step forward."

     "You know what?" She shook her head and placed her fingers on her temples. "I am done with this poor excuse for a ballet! Good luck putting on this shit show without me!"

     Everyone remained still and silent as Dean watched in complete horror while Ruby grabbed her bag from backstage, and promptly stormed down the stage steps and out the door. His eyes followed her all the way until the door slammed shut behind her, then he looked back up at Cas. He just shook his head, completely exhausted. Obviously this wasn't the first time they had to deal with an outburst from her. 

     "Great! Just great!" One of the directors, the taller one, threw his notes in the air and ran tight fingers through his hair, "We have less than three months till the show debuts, and now we have to find and train another Clara for the show! It's impossible, we can't do it, show’s over!"

     "We’ll find a way," the shorter director said, trying to calm the other, "we have to. Tickets are going on sale very soon and we are already expected to sell out. We can't cancel now, Chuck."

     "Then what, Metatron, what do we do? Start auditioning again? Call back the people we rejected the first time? I’m sure they’ll love that!"

     Metatron just shook his head and walked away, leaving Chuck to panic as well as the dancers on stage, who were all now gathering in groups and chatting frantically. Dean didn't know what to do other than just sit there in shock, he couldn't believe he had just watched one of the ballets lead roles walk out like that.

     “Wait!'' Dean looked up to Cas with a start, and everyone else in the theater followed suit. “I may have someone who could help.”

     Both directors gave Cas a skeptical look and waited for him to continue. Before he answered, Cas looked down at Dean with a frightening glint in his eyes that gave Dean the most frantic butterflies he had ever felt. 

     “You know someone?” Metatron asked, almost slightly impatient.

     “Yes, they already know all the parts of the ballet, all the acts and all the steps, start to finish.” Dean perked up a bit in his seat, not liking the look in Cas’s eyes at all. That sudden feeling to get up and run had returned to him again, but he was also frozen in place. Seemed his brain and legs couldn’t come to the same conclusion. “They are talented beyond all belief and absolutely perfect for the role of Clara.”

     Dean finally found a little control over his limbs and managed to stand, letting out a low warning as he did. “Cas.”

     Though Cas ignored it and continued on, “I have seen them perform the ballet numerous times. Their execution is perfect, flawless, seamless, the perfect lead for this ballet.”

     “Cas…” Dean took a few steps toward the front of the stage, speaking his warning a little louder this time but still getting no reaction out of Cas.

     “And our chemistry in the roles is already… intense, electric,” he then looked over at Dean who was staring back at him with a lust he could feel across the room, “even outside of dance we have a profound bond.”

     “Cas…” He breathed, almost completely breathless. 

     The two just stared at each other, the bond Cas had spoke of lighting the room with a fire that everyone there could feel.

     “Well,” Chuck interrupted, pulling Cas's eyes away from Dean, “don't leave us in suspense! Who is it?!” 

     “Though, bringing this person in to play the lead role would change the dynamics slightly, but it might end up being a good thing.”

     “Who is it, Castiel?!” Chuck was nearly pulling his hair out. 

     Cas turned back to look at Dean and everyone's eyes followed him. Dean just stood there, even more stunned then he was before, and now suddenly feeling trapped.

     “Him?!” Metatron turned back to Cas who nodded. “Who even is he?”

     “His name is Dean Winchester.”

     “Let me get this straight,” Chuck took a few steps forwards, taking a second to rub a hand down his face before asking, quite annoyed, “you want us to let some random man off the street, someone I've never even heard of before, not only join our highly respected and prestigious ballet, but also play the lead?!”

     “He is an amazing dancer,” Cas argued, “and he already knows the role, he would need very little training. Much less training then having to hire someone who might be a known dancer, but has never before danced The Nutcracker. And as you said, we don’t have much time.”

     Chuck shook his head at Cas then rounded on Dean, “Where did you train?” Dean just opened his mouth and closed it again. “Who trained you?” Again, Dean wasn't able to say anything, just stand there awkwardly. So Chuck turned back to Castiel and threw his hands in the air, slapping them on his legs as he let them fall.

     “I trained him,” Cas answered for Dean.

     “You?!”

     “Yes,” Cas nodded.

     “So you mean to tell me that he has had no formal training?!”

     “He's an amazing dancer,” Cas repeated, enunciating every word.

     “No,” Chuck closed his eyes and shook his head, “no, no, no, no, no! Absolutely not! No!”

     “At least let him show you what he can do. Let us dance the finale together. Once you see his skills and our chemistry, I promise you will change your minds.”

     Chuck looked over to Metatron who gave him a shrug, “What harm could it do at this point.”

     Chuck looked between Castiel and Dean, then just waved his hands and said, “Fine, do whatever you want then,” and threw himself in a chair in the front row and waited.

     Cas walked down the steps and over to where Dean was still frozen in place and stood in front of him. 

     “I… I can’t dance in front of people, Cas! Are you insane?!” He shook his head, breathless with nerves. “I’m a closeted dancer, not even my own mother or brother know that I dance! And now you not only want me to dance in front of the people in my own town, but then also travel around with you and dance in front of people nationwide?!”

     “Dean, calm down,” he ran his hands down Dean's arms and it seemed to help a bit, “I know you have never told anyone about your passion for dancing before, but perhaps this is a sign. Maybe now is the time to just finally be you, to do what you love, to dance freely. At least give it a try, come on stage and dance with me and I promise you will love it.”

     Dean just stared at him, mouth open and head slightly shaking. 

     “Dean,” Cas breathed, stepping closer and placing a hand on his cheek which Dean turned into, closing his eyes, “just let go, fall with me.”

     After a moment of just soaking Cas in, and feeling the comforting warmth on his skin he nodded, taking one last shaky breath before he opened his eyes to gaze at Cas once again.

     “Good,” Cas breathed, and he could feel the warmth ghosting over his lips, “do you have your duffel with you?”

     “Yeah, it's in the trunk of my car.”

     “Go get it, change backstage, and meet me center stage when you're ready.”

     He nodded again then shook his head and whispered, more to himself then to Cas, “I can’t believe I'm doing this,” then turned and left the theater.

~~~~~~~~~~~

     A few minutes later Dean was standing just off to the side of the stage, in the shadows behind the curtains, taking deep breaths as he watched Cas standing in the center. After one last breath he stepped out, slowly, cautiously, eyes wide as he saw everyone sitting in the seats below the stage, the directors dead center and eyes on him. He stopped walking and froze before he made it to Cas. 

     “Dean,” he heard Cas’s voice, but couldn't even move to look up at him, “Dean.”

     He heard his voice that time and looked up. Cas was holding out a hand to him, waiting patiently for him to walk over, which he eventually did, very slowly. 

     He reached out and took Cas’s outstretched hand, allowing Cas to pull him in close to his chest, pressing their foreheads together. “It's just like at the studio, Dean. Dance like it's just you and me up here, together and alone. Just focus on me, nothing else.”

     “But Cas, we haven't done the final dance together yet,” he risked a glance over to where the directors were sitting, looking a bit impatient now, “it's the only part of the ballet we haven't gotten to yet.”

     “But you know the steps, Dean.”

     “Yeah, but.”

     “But nothing,” he reached up and ran the back of his hand down Dean's cheek, “you can do this. Show them just how amazing you are, how amazing I know you are.”

     Dean nodded, then he and Cas separated to stand in their positions. Cas looked down to the composer with a nod to signal him to start the music, then looked over to Dean. He could tell Dean was nervous, shaking slightly and fiddling with his hands, so he called over to him and got his attention. “Just you and me, Dean.”

     He swallowed hard but told himself that Cas was right. He just needed to pretend that no one else was there, the theater was empty, it was just him and Cas same as it was every other time they've danced together. So he closed his eyes, erased everything and everyone from his mind except Cas, and as the music started he smoothly transitioned into the steps he knew so well. 

     It was an almost instant change from Dean to Clara as he practically jumped into the roll, and he and Cas were moving as one. Despite the two of them having never actually practiced this dance together, they were in perfect sync, it was as if they had danced it a million times together. Every move they made, every step, every breath was taken as one, right up until the final note and they were standing frozen in their final position. They were chest to chest and nose to nose, a breath away, breathing hard after having given the most amazing performance together. And they had been here before, Dean thought, pulled together feeling this fire between them, and every time he waited for Cas to take that final step. To close the gap…

     “That! Was! Magnificent!” Clapping from the seats below them had them turning their heads away from each other snapping back to reality, still breathless from the dance and pure intensity between them, their chests heaving together. “I… I am absolutely blown away! You were splendid, Dean, splendid!”

     “Especially for someone who has never had any formal training before,” Metatron joined Chuck in his standing ovation, “where did you learn to move like that?”

     Cas nudged a blushing Dean forward to the edge of the stage and urged him to answer, though he could tell that he was still nervous and obviously not used to the attention and praise over his dancing. “I… I taught myself, actually. I used online video tutorials, and also just watched and studied other dancers. And Cas, he's helped me to perfect my moves, I wouldn't be anywhere near this good if it wasn't for him.”

     Dean turned to gaze at Cas with a smile. He still had an arm wrapped around Dean and was looking down at him with as much adoration as Dean was at him. 

     “And you were right, Castiel,” Chuck nudged Metatron beside him, and the two of them smirked as they looked up at the two dancers wrapped in each other on stage, “the chemistry between the two of you is perfect!”

     “Chuck’s right,” Metatron spoke as he started walking up the steps to join them, and Chuck followed, “who needs that stuck up, snobby diva Ruby when we have you, Dean!”

     “I-”

     “And you are right, Castiel, bringing Dean on will change the dynamic of the original story, but this could be a monumental step for us!” Chuck then turned to Metatron as the two of them both started getting very excited about the thought of two male leads. “The first Nutcracker with two male leads! This could be big! We could be big!”

     “So what do you say, Dean? Take the position!” Both of them locked their eyes on Dean, almost boring into him with an intensity that he felt in his soul. 

     “I…” He looked up at Cas, then just shook his head, “I don't know.”

     “W-what do you mean you don't know?” Chuck was baffled, “People would kill to be in your position right now. An unknown dancer, picked off the streets and given the opportunity to play one of the lead roles in what is surely going to be a ballet to remember?! You could become a legend in dance.”

     “I’m a bit of a closeted dancer. No one knows that I dance besides Castiel, and now you guys. It's…” He took a hard breath and let it out slow, “It's hard to openly be this person after I've been someone else my entire life. People expect me to be a certain way, and this sudden change could cause me to lose so much.”

     “But also gain even more!” Metatron reached out and placed a hand on Dean's shoulder.

     “I…”

     Cas pulled Dean closer to his side, shielding him from his directors who he knew could sometimes go a little overboard. Not to mention the fact that he knew pressuring Dean like this was only going to make it worse, make his nerves worse. “We don't have another rehearsal for a few days. Let's give Dean some time to think about the offer before anyone makes any decisions.”

     “You’re right, you're right.” They both raised their hands and took a step back. “Think about it Dean, take some time to make your decision, but while you think about it, know that we would absolutely love to have you with us!”

     “If it's alright, I'll let you know by the next rehearsal.”

     Chuck and Metatron both told Dean to take his time with the decision, but they both were praying that he would agree. Seeing the two of them dance together was an opportunity they really didn't want to have to pass up on. After which, Dean changed backstage, said his thanks to the directors, and then Cas walked him back out to his car.

~~~~~~~~~~~ 

     Dean plopped himself hard on the floor and sat back against the mirror of the dance studio he shared with Cas. He was sweating and panting, he had been working harder this week then he ever had during practices, and he was more than sure that it was because he was trying to keep a certain decision from creeping into his mind every time he let it wander.

     Cas came over to sit next to him, passing Dean a bottle of water as he did, and sat in silence for a few minutes. And though he knew that Cas was trying to give him as much time as he needed to make the decision about the position at the ballet, Dean could feel the tension and curiosity radiating off of him the entire night. 

     He took a drink then huffed to try and catch his breath before eyeing Cas from the side, “Alright, ask me.”

     “Ask you what, Dean?” He tried to feign innocence but it was not fooling Dean.

     “Don't try to play me, Cas,” he shook his head and shifted to turn towards Cas, “I know you want to ask me about taking the position, if I've made my decision yet. And I guess I should give you an answer, considering the next rehearsal is tomorrow night.”

     Cas nodded, then he also turned so they were now facing each other, and tangled their legs together, “Well then, have you come to a decision?” Dean just sighed and lowered his head. “If it helps any, I would be there with you every step of the way, quite literally. Not to mention that I would love to be performing the ballet with you.”

     “It helps a little,” he couldn't help but smile a bit, “but I… I don't know, Cas. If I do go through with this then eventually, at some point, my family is going to find out one way or another. Either I'll have to tell them, or someone in town will tell them, and I… I just don't want them to be disappointed in me.”

     Cas shuffled closer to Dean, the two of them wrapping their legs around each other as Cas placed his forehead to rest against Dean’s. “Perhaps they will not be disappointed, but proud.”

     “But what if they aren’t proud? What if they think my dad was right? That I should be playing sports not dancing around a stage in tights?!”

     “Dean, calm down,” he smoothed his hands down Dean's neck, “you will never know until you try, and if they end up being angry or disappointed then that's their loss. No matter what happens I will still be right beside you. But it's time to stop hiding it, Dean, it's time to be you.”

     “Yeah,” he swallowed hard, but nodded, “you're right. It's… it's time I think about what I want and not what my father would have wanted for me. And… and if someone's upset about that then that's not my problem.”

     “Exactly. You are an amazing person, Dean, anyone would be a fool not to see it.” Dean smiled and ran his hands up and into Cas’s hair, the two just sitting there for a minute before Cas asked, “So, does that mean you'll take the part?”

     “Yeah, I'll take the part.”

~~~~~~~~~~~ 

     After Dean went back to the theater with Cas and accepted the part, the directors were thrilled. Dean was extremely nervous, but as Cas had promised he was right there beside Dean through every step. 

     They had been rehearsing for a few weeks now, and Dean had taken to his new role splendidly. Everyone in the theater was more than pleased with his performance during rehearsals, many of them gushing over the fact that it was going to be the best rendition of The Nutcracker to be performed in years, even decades maybe.

     As Castiel had said before, they did end up making a few alterations to the ballet, one of them being that they changed Dean's role from Clara to Charles, as well as a few alterations to the ending. But despite the last minute changes that were made after Ruby's abrupt exit, the entire cast was very excited to be finally sharing their hard work with many people all across the country. 

     They had just finished up with one of their last rehearsals before the tickets for the show were to go live, and Dean and Cas were getting ready to leave for the night when their directors came over to them, each handing them a bundle of tickets.

     Dean took them and rolled them over in his hand before asking with a raised brow, “What are these for?”

     “Castiel told us you live with your mom and brother, right?” Chuck asked.

     “Yeah…” He drawled, now a little worried.

     “These tickets are for them,” Chuck confirmed Dean's fears, “front row seats for the debut show. Word has been getting around about our ballet having two male leads and the theater is already getting calls about buying tickets. We are expecting to be sold out of all shows within a day, so we reserved a few tickets for the families of each of our cast and crew members.”

     “Oh...wow, I…” He stuttered, not really knowing what to say. Not to mention that his heart was now down in his feet at the mere thought of even humouring telling his mom and brother about the show. Was it naïve to think that he could just keep it a secret forever?

     “No need to thank us,” Metatron smiled at him, not knowing how much dread was running through his veins right now, “We hope to meet them on opening night. Have a good night you two.”

     Dean just kind of nodded as they walked away. He was unusually quiet as Cas walked him out to his car like he did every night after rehearsals. Then sat in his car for a few minutes before finally driving home, trying to figure out exactly how he was going to do this without either crying, throwing up, passing out, or quite possibly all three. It was bound to be a super fun weekend.

~~~~~~~~~~~

     When Dean got home from rehearsals that night it was still pretty early. His mom and brother were still asleep, which he decided was for the better, seeing as his stomach was still turning pretty bad. The tickets were weighing heavily in his duffle that was slung over his shoulder, he could practically feel them burning a hole through the bag. But he pushed the thought aside for now since they were still passed out in bed, and decided to occupy his mind with doing some laundry instead. His tights were a complete mess from rehearsals this week and he would rather just get it done now before his mom and Sam woke up. 

     He went straight to the laundry room as soon as he got inside and tossed his duffel bag on top of the washing machine. Before he threw it in the machine he quickly bound up the stairs to his room to grab the special fabric softener he had bought for himself, partly because he liked the smell, but mostly because he knew Cas liked it.

     He grabbed the fabric softener then took a moment to sit on his bed, rehearsals lately had been taking a lot out of him. As it got closer and closer to opening night, rehearsals got more and more intense. He placed the bottle on his nightstand and before he knew it, he was laying back on the bed. Just a minute, he thought, then he would get up and do his laundry. Then his eyes were closing and he decided he would let them, just rest them for a few seconds then he would get up. But before he could even stop himself he was passed out with his legs hanging over the edge of his bed, laundry completely forgotten.

~~~~~~~~~~~ 

                                 PREVIOUS          NEXT

A/N: One more chapter to go after this! 

Tags: @thebridgekid 

[giranswife]

So I got tagged by both @lildreamysoul and @jagerdernacht to do this with my husband, and might I say... I’m excited XD Bit of warning for anyone, my husband doesn’t really have a filter, as most of you are aware, so you’ve been warned as far as like suggestive comments and shit goes lol

So I’m honest, that a big fuckin’ deal?

‘Course not. It’s why I love you, just gotta give a warning just to be safe. Now, let’s get started because this is gonna be-- a ride lol

Introduce yourselves. Who are you? What do you like to do?

Well, you guys already know me, Violet- Nothing really all that exciting there lol but I like to read, write, draw. It’s a new hobby that I started up a couple years ago and have been improving since! I also love playing video games and watching movies together is another big one I enjoy.

Don’t say that, baby girl. Couldn’t be further from the truth. But I’m Giran, her husband. Pretty sure that to answer the next question, I’d be breakin’ the first rule that she gave me-

God damn it, babe. Don’t listen to him, ignore him, please. 

I’m just teasing. I’ll be good, for now.

How was your first meeting like?

Oh, jeez. Well, first meetings weren’t really the best between us. Didn’t exactly get along with him, per say...

She wasn’t really my biggest fan. If yah ask how in the hell I got her to marry me, well-

Oh, whatever, baby. He might not have been my favorite person the first time we met, but he grew on me. Really grew on me.

How did you get together? Who confessed first?

It took a while with lots of denying on my end. I definitely didn’t confess first.

I don’t know if I remember it like that, Princess-

Oh, please. You know that I was pretty insistent about hiding the fact that I was into you.... romantically at least. As far as confessions go... believe it or not he was actually the one to at least vocalize that he wanted more out of the relationship.

Knew that yah needed a little push, and I was happier than I thought that I would be. What’s the fuckin’ point in hidin’ that? Besides, I couldn’t resist when you were looking as beautiful as ya were.

What are your thoughts on PDA?

Oh damn, well... considering my husband is the most shameless person I fucking know-

What can I say, baby girl. I just can’t keep my hands off yah.

I mean... I don’t mind... it’s just the more he does it the redder my face gets. And since he’s always pulling me into his lap and shit, I pretty much am always there. Not that I don’t like being in his arms though.

And I wouldn’t have it any other way-

How do you show your affection towards each other/what are your love languages?

We are both really different in that regard, but there’s also a few things that we’re similar to! For example, I’m more of the affectionate person but I also constantly talk about how much I love him and just like... I’m extremely open.

My princess is a lot better with words than I am. I like to spoil her and treat her. Anything to see her smile and let her know how much I love her. Don’t want her forgetting how special she is.

Who’s more introverted and who’s more extroverted?

Well... I tend to be more introverted, to be honest. Definitely lean more that way, but I wouldn’t say that we’re both like that. Honestly, I feel like he’s a bit in the middle? I don’t know! I’ve never thought about it-

You’re definitely right about that, Princess. I’m more extroverted than you are, but even then I wouldn’t exactly describe myself that way either.

Me neither. There’s some aspects of both, so honestly I’d say that both of us kinda don’t really fit either one exactly, but we definitely lean more one way than the other.

Who’s the big spoon and who’s the little spoon?

Oh, I’m the little spoon all the way.

She’s right. My adorable little spoon.

Oh my gooood, please stop-- (spoiler: he doesn’t)

What do you like doing together the most?

Or rather what don’t we like doing together- I’m sorry, that was bad. How in the hell did this get so corny? Are we corny now?

‘Course not. But you’ve always been. It’s alright, though, it’s why I love yah. 

Let’s just answer the god damn question before my face explodes. I’d probably have to say that really we like the most just being with each other just the two of us? Given that we don’t really get a whole lot of alone time, believe it or not, it’s really nice whenever we can just relax and be together. It’s what I prefer, anyway. Dinner and a movie. Going out every now and then is really nice.

Couldn’t have said it better. I’d much rather bein’ with my princess, but I like goin’ out with yah. This one can make anything interesting, lemme tell yah. 

Tell us a fun fact about the other!

Ooooh, fun facts! Well, for starters, Giran is actually a huge romantic. Might not look it, but I promise you the man is romantic and sweet and doting. Also, another fun fact, this man kinda knows how to play piano. Not much, but a little-

Wouldn’t say that I’m good, but she’s entertained by the idea ever since she found out.

Well, yeah-- I really wouldn’t expect you of all people to have any musical fucking talent.

Oh like you, Princess? When’s the next time ya gonna play for me? This one is the musical one. Her flute playing’s beautiful, and I know that she can also play the piccolo but-

Oh god, I haven’t played either in so long. Please, don’t mention it. I’m ashamed that it’s been this long since I’ve played. I miss it.

Tag other selfshippers and their f/os.

Oh for sure!

@self-shipping-angel and Levi!

@wispy-selfship-eden and Izuku!

@millizines and Earnest

@securitycopswife and Ushio

@star-platinums-wife and Star!

@nougatships and Tomura

[daesungindistress]

A message I received today (she wanted it published):

“Hi! I was browsing the bigbang tag here when i found your account and I had a pretty interesting evening reading your blog! Imagine my surprise when I found out you were the RcA of carnivores...... i was surprised then not at all because I remember writing you a monstrously long review then you replying me with an even longer reply XD In that spirit, I shall give my 2 cents

i saw your various posts about seungrigate, in particular the hyungline's prophecizing abilities. To preface this, I don't support Seungri and I'm not a OT5 stan but I think these videos, while chilling to watch in the aftermath of seungrigate events, have become overblown in some sort of Bigbang history revisionism

The truth is, if GD really thought Seungri was going to go to jail, or had any side illegal activities, he definitely wouldn't have aired his views in front of cameras, in a DVD recording available to everyone. Similar reasoning to every other incidence of 'prophecizing' the hyungs did. If the hyungs really suspected Seungri's club was out drugging and raping women, the stupidest way to have resolved it would have been to take it to TV. Not to mention how suddenly chilling it is if the hyungs actually did know and were complicit in the crimes, which I feel like a lot of these prophecy video retweeters don't consider.

At best, they thought (and I too thought at that time) that Seungri was maybe making bad money decisions, Lee Sangmin style.

I think its comforting to think the signs were always there, that the hyungs warned him but he didn't listen, that their relationships were fraught because of the whole Seungri never eats with us memes, that he was never a good person and he showed it all along but the fans shoved their head under the sand. But to characterize him as a 2D villain so that we don't have to struggle to reconcile the person we idolized before, and the crimes he's accused of now is only a disservice to us.

Seungri wasn't the only one who skipped out on dinners- TOP had that habit before Seungri, and i think it was even mentioned in Healing Camp (the whole gold medal thing). Seungri did like and love his hyungs unless he was the world's best actor. He talked Jiyong through things in 2009 when Jiyong read the comments asking him to comment suicide and cried on phone. He cried on Jiyong for 20 minutes in 2012 because he was disappointed in a hyung he idolized letting him down with the marijuana scandal. He texted Daesung within one minute on that Japanese show when he said he needed help, and cheered him up when he was dying of nerves before his concert. He saved Todae from getting hit by fireworks in Malaysia by physically hauling them away. When TOP was represented by a tower in variety shows, Seungri blatantly mentioned his name in Radio Star when everyone pretended he didn't exist. The kid we knew existed. It's just that there was another, more insidious side to him too. This is NOT a defence of Seungri, I just think there's been a lot of revisionism going on lately, about his character and his relationship with the band. Seungri is a shitty criminal, but sadly a criminal who did love his hyungs and fans in some way. Not everything that happened in the last 12 years is fake.

i remember feeling very grateful when Seungri showed up in Act 3 Motte and hugged Jiyong and Jiyong smiled for the first time in that whole damn tour. Jiyong loved that boy, and mentioned he was family to him so many times. Jiyong was the most attached to Seungri IMO (I guess since they were roommates back then and all), but Taeyang called him up in the military when he only had one call, forgoing his own damn wife. I think, the truly heartbreaking thing about this, is that Seungri was loved by his hyungs, and he did love his hyungs too.”

***

Do you know how many asks it would have taken to get this message to me had you gone that route after all? LOL, alright, here’s my reply (some of which will be behind a cut to save y’all’s dashboards). I’ll quote the parts I want to address in italics.

“The truth is, if GD really thought Seungri was going to go to jail, or had any side illegal activities, he definitely wouldn't have aired his views in front of cameras, in a DVD recording available to everyone.”

That's what we all thought too... and that's why we didn't take any of it seriously and casually wrote most of it off as jokes, bullying, teasing, playing, etc. And while I'm sure it was that in a way, at least in part, you know what they say: there's a grain of truth in every joke (or "a little bit of truth behind every 'just kidding'").

Many fans are also taking this as a sign of how serious the others were becoming in their warnings to him, as if they felt it was the only way to get through to him. I'm sure they had private conversations off-camera, but if they were williing to do it publicly? On national TV? (Radio Star, for example.) That appears to say something about the weight of their concerns and their attempts to reach him. (Also keep in mind that they've said they rarely saw him outside of band activities, that he was always running off as soon as events with them had ended, so who knows... maybe they felt that on camera was the only real chance they had to catch him and address him in person. Maybe they felt like it was the only way he would listen. So many maybes.)

Another thing: TOP's rather astute comments about Seungri's friends (that they seemed like bad people, that they were using him, that they weren't his true friends but were only attracted to his fame, etc)... I personally would not have said those things where the public could hear them were I in his position. There's nothing joking about it, nothing at all. He was very direct in his delivery and it was not something that could be laughed away even if you tried.

“If the hyungs really suspected Seungri's club was out drugging and raping women, the stupidest way to have resolved it would have been to take it to TV. Not to mention how suddenly chilling it is if the hyungs actually did know and were complicit in the crimes, which I feel like a lot of these prophecy video retweeters don't consider.”

Okay everyone, listen up. This is important. In all these videos being referenced by fans in recent days, it's not possible that the hyungs were hinting at the drugging and assault that occurred at "Seungri's club" (I still hesitate to call it that) because Burning Sun did not yet exist when these things were being said. The club Burning Sun opened in February 2018. The last time BB were together as a group (as four -- GD, YB, Daesung, Seungri) was during their Japan Dome Tour in December 2017. And TOP? January 2017.

(read the rest behind the cut)

Further information: GD enlisted in late February 2018 and YB & Daesung enlisted less then a month later in mid March. Burning Sun opened in February 2018 and closed a year later in February 2019 during Burning Sun gate. The videos floating around in which the hyungs appear to warn Seungri come primarily from their 2017 Welcoming Collection (filmed in late 2016), Run BIGBANG Scout (shot in summer 2016), and from various concerts and fanmeetings throughout 2016-2017.

It is true that people do need to be very cautious when speculating about just how much the others knew about what Seungri & Co got up to, seeing as how, when it comes to this type of crime, awareness of the crime can be quite damning in and of itself. But once you take these dates into account, I think the others should be fairly safe from that kind of dangerous speculation. The question then becomes, how much did they know about what Seungri & Co got up to in their own time?

That I’m not overly worried about. They made it quite clear on several occasions that they hated his friends. Why would they have had any involvement with them? And it’s difficult to imagine Seungri inviting them in, so to speak, knowing how they were always scolding him for one thing or another. The way I see it, he found his own flock and kept a tight formation. Birds of a feather and all that.

“At best, they thought (and I too thought at that time) that Seungri was maybe making bad money decisions, Lee Sangmin style.”

This is the assumption most fans seem to be going with. Additionally, they may have had some ideas about his treatment of women as well, especially taking into account his 2012 sex scandal with a Japanese woman in which he allegedly choked her during sex, never kissed her, and threw a towel at her when he was done (and after which Youngbae and Daesung moved in with him, evidently to keep an eye on him and help set him straight. I don’t know how much truth there is to this, but I’ve read that he seemed proud in the scandal’s aftermath because hey, people were finally viewing him as an adult. Talk about embracing one's bad boy image.)

On that note: if he was in fact proud of himself for getting caught up in a sex scandal back then because he felt like it made him more of a man, then what must he be feeling now? Bearing in mind the influence of his less-than-reputable friend group of the last few years? He's currently under suspicion of hooking up with prostitutes and offering them to his investors to grow his business, among other things. The public is calling him a pimp (not totally accurate but ok). His conduct lately is not that of a person who feels he's done anything wrong. He might even feel a little, well... pleased with himself. Hence that small but self-satisfied grin he's been wearing everywhere lately.

Hmm... Just some thoughts.

“But to characterize him as a 2D villain so that we don't have to struggle to reconcile the person we idolized before, and the crimes he's accused of now is only a disservice to us.”

I’m sorry you see it this way because that's not my intent at all. My goal is not to paint him as a villain but to simply show that the signs of trouble were there and to suggest that perhaps we shouldn't be as surprised as we are about recent revelations. That this isn't really coming at us -- or at the rest of BB for that matter -- completely out of the blue. I don't know about you, but I find that comforting. Understanding what went wrong and when helps me to better come to terms with what's happened here, and I've been hearing from quite a few others lately who say it's helped them too. It also reinforces my confidence in OT4′s ability to carry on, because if they expected him to leave them in the near future, it stands to reason that they had been mentally and emotionally readying themselves for it. We the fans are hurting enough; the last thing I want right now is for the members of BB to be hurting too.

I'm also hope my readers don’t think I’m suggesting that Seungri was never a good person or never did anything good for anyone. That’s not it at all. Nothing is ever that black and white. I won’t forget them or try to erase them, it’s just that right now I'm not very interested in reflecting on the “good times”... and I think most would agree. Those acts of kindness you're referencing in 2009, 2011, 2012, 2013... you might have noticed that I've been focusing on conversations between the guys that took place in 2016 onward. Between MADE era and the present day. Alive era, Tonight era... I'm not interested in examining those years, because I'm concentrating on the period of time after Seungri met his new circle of friends (Jung Joonyoung, Choi Jonghoon, Yoo In Suk, etc) and began spending more time with them than with the rest of BB. I'm certainly not implying that Seungri was always this way, but I do believe he had the potential to become it given the right -- or should I say wrong influences. And he found those influences. Or should I say they found him?

Now, this is just speculation, but BB's popularity exploded immensely during Alive in 2012.  After that the members of BB went their separate ways for a time to work on solo projects. They came together periodically for YG family tours, I know that much, but it wasn't until MADE in 2015 that they were promoting as five again. It can probably be assumed that it was during that absence when Seungri ~fell in with this bad crowd~ (I hate to use that phrase because it seems to absolve him of responsibility for his actions, but let’s just go with it for a sec). I suspect the sharp rise in fame went to his head and he became... let’s just say susceptible.

(If there are any Seungri stans still here, feel free to correct me if I'm wrong about the timeline or chime in with additional info. My knowledge of what the members were up to between Alive and MADE is pretty murky, seeing as I wasn't "there" for it in real time.)

“When TOP was represented by a tower in variety shows, Seungri blatantly mentioned his name in Radio Star when everyone pretended he didn't exist.”

Someone brought this up in an ask that I haven't answered (sorry anon!). While it's entirely possible that he did this out of the goodness of his own heart, it's also possible that he did it because he knew it was what the fans wanted... and Seungri is nothing if not good at giving people what they want. It might not have had anything to do with TOP's feelings at all. I also wonder if YB calling him while in the military may have been done more out of concern than affection -- i.e., checking in on him to make sure he stayed out of trouble.

...and that's if Seungri's story is even to be believed, i.e., "He called me instead of his wife, can you believe it?!" Seungri is not above using the others to draw eyes to himself and prop up his own popularity (as he did when he name dropped GD constantly during his Great Seungri promotions), and given the others' comments about him exaggerating and even flat-out making up stories that haven’t a shred of truth for attention... just saying I wouldn't put anything past him at this point.

“The kid we knew existed. It's just that there was another, more insidious side to him too.”

That's really all it boils down to. Although I don't much care for calling him a "kid" anymore. I know he likes to play up the cute maknae role and all when it benefits him, but it's never sat well with me because, well... dude's a grown man, and calling him "kid" in light of recent events feels very wrong. That "kid" image is long gone, and I say good riddance. (For the record, I don't much like it when the others go all aegyo on each other either; with them now in their late 20s - early 30s, I have to say it's gotten a little weird.)

“Seungri is a shitty criminal, but sadly a criminal who did love his hyungs and fans in some way. Not everything that happened in the last 12 years is fake. ... I think, the truly heartbreaking thing about this, is that Seungri was loved by his hyungs, and he did love his hyungs too.”

I believe in... their love for him to varying degrees. Some were closer than others, of course. This is why, in a previous post, I said that I won't be surprised if some of them decide to stay in Seungri's life as a positive influence behind the scenes. However, at the same time, I won't be surprised if they choose not to. The thing is, you can still remain friends with someone but recognize that the two of you just don't work well together anymore in a, well, work environment. The bonds of friendship are important, yes, but as I think we've seen lately... it isn't everything.

With what we know now, I believe that the tension we've seen building between Seungri and the other members over the last few years was rooted in Seungri losing his passion for music as his obsession with wealth and power took over. Greed got the best of him. And I’m sure he was frustrated; there were things he wanted from Big Bang that Big Bang could not give him.

Although his hyungs surely still cared for him, more or less, I can see why in the last few years they may have been uncomfortable continuing to work with him if they felt that he was staying for all the wrong reasons. If you're going to be part of a group of artists like this one, it helps with group morale, to be confident in the knowledge that you all share a common interest and are working toward a common goal. If the others' goal was in expressing themselves through their craft -- music and dance -- and connecting with the fans through their work, while Seungri saw it primarily as a means to an end (i.e., "It's just a paycheck") then yeah. I'd have found myself getting pretty irritated with him too.

In the end, you can care for someone and still distance yourself from them, for an abundance of reasons. I think many of us have been there with loved ones ourselves... and I believe that's what we're going to see happen in the coming months when the others come back. Hell, it's been happening for years right under our noses; the difference now is they don't have to try to hide it anymore.

[archive--not-completely-human]

———  BASICS! ♡

NAME! ♡ Brittany

PRONOUNS ! ♡ She/Her

ZODIAC SIGN! ♡ Scorpio

TAKEN OR SINGLE! ♡ single 

———  THREE  FACTS! ♡

1! ♡ I used to like singing in the car but one day my dad told me to be quiet and I never ever ever did it again lmao. That was like forever ago now XD 

2! ♡ I will spend hundreds of dollars on merchandise for movies I like and stuffed animals I want...... But if a shirt costs $20+ it’s too expensive. 

3! ♡ I started roleplaying on Youtube waaayyyyy back before it changed and you were able to customize your profiles to look really nice and pretty. I was super hesitant to join tumblr for a few years, but after all the RP websites I had been on fell on very low activity, I decided to just do it and join tumblr and I’m really glad I did! 

———  EXPERIENCE! ♡

PLATFORMS USED! ♡ Tumblr mostly, it’s where I spend most of my time. It’s pretty much the only place I roleplay as of now. I have an account over on RoleplayDomain . com but it’s very inactive, impossible to find roleplays and everybody wants deep plots planned out before starting and I suck shit at plotting lol 

———  MUSE  PREFERENCE! ♡

GENDER! ♡ For me personally? Female characters. BUT!!! Female human muses. If it’s an animal muse, males are cool. I have a male dragon muse. But I don’t want to stress myself trying to accurately write a male human-muse. I’d fail miserably. I tried. I failed miserably. Never again. I love male and female muses though and am not picky on the gender of my partner’s muse(s)

LEAST FAVOURITE FACE(S)! ♡ Faceclaims, I’m assuming... None. I don’t care. The face is just a face. I don’t care about the face, I care about the work that went into your character (for OCs). The face is but only a face to me. 

MULTI OR SINGLE! ♡ I prefer a single account only because I like focusing the blog on promoting that one muse. HOWEVER. I have a multi-muse account. I have two blogs... I have this one and another blog with two animal muses. That’s all I can handle lol 

FLUFF / ANGST / SMUT ♡

FLUFF: NA

ANGST: NA

SMUT: no smut lmao, sorry, bleh. Not interested at all. Romance? Yes. Smut? Never. 

note - I can’t say I 100% understand the concept behind “fluff” and “angst” but I like just about anything and will do almost anything and probably enjoy it as long as it’s not smut XD 

PLOT / MEMES! ♡ I prefer memes... Memes, random starters, responses to open starters. I LOVE getting things in my ask box, love it love it. I am absolutely horrible at plotting. Embarrassingly terrible at it, I even put a warning about this in my rules. I hate plotting because I suck at it. I’ll plot if that’s what my partner wants, of course, but, don’t get angry at me when I can’t think of anything and overall just suck because not only do my rules warn you I suck, I will personally tell you straight up that I am terrible .-. I really wish that I wasn’t, and unfortunately this isn’t one of those “practice makes perfect” scenarios. I literally just can’t. I can try, but if you left plotting up to me I’d probably never get back to you because I’ll never think of anything. It’s happened before. I just can’t do it. You’d have better luck finding diamonds in your own backyard than waiting for me to come up with an idea lmao

nicked it from: stolen from @multimuse-online

tagging: anybody that sees this and wants to do it! 

[sushigirlali]

Bellarke + "Well that's pretty rude of you to say" and/or "Do you trust me?"

Prompt: “Well that’s pretty rude of you to say" and/or “Do you trust me?”

Pairing: Bellamy Blake x Clarke Griffin [Bellarke]

Continuity: Modern AU

Rating: T+

A/N: I had way too much fun with this one lol See if you can pick out all the references XD

——————

For: @craniumhurricane​

Love: sushigirlali

Ride Or Die

——————

Clarke’slong legs burned as she barreled down the street, determined to evade capture. She’dalready been busted for graffiti twice, so if she got caught again, there was areal possibility she’d go to jail. Judge Jaha would just love that. He’sbeen looking for an excuse to lock me up for years.

Slingingher heavy drawstring backpack over her shoulder, Clarke briefly contemplatedtossing the evidence but knew she’d have a hard time defending herself in courtif the cops were to find it; her prints were all over the bag and its contents,after all.

Chancinga look behind her, Clarke realized that she’d managed to lose the officer who’dchased her from the scene. If she could get out of the area before he called inthe cavalry, she’d be home free.

“Now’syour chance, Clarke, move it,” she huffed, dodging pedestrians as she zoomeddown the crowded sidewalk. No one seemed to be paying her any mind, likelybecause her black leggings and mocha tank top gave the impression that she wasjust an innocent jogger, but it was better to be safe than sorry.

Cuttingbehind the next building she passed, Clarke crossed the road and entered adeserted alleyway, intending to put as much distance between herself andpotential witnesses as possible. But no sooner had she turned the corner than afigure in all black smacked right into her, taking her to the ground.

“Oof!”Clarke groaned, dropping her bag and landing flat on her back.

“Oh,shit!” a husky voice swore. “I didn’t see you there! Are you okay?”

“I—am—not,”she wheezed, trying to catch her breath as she stared up into the softest browneyes she’d ever seen. The guy who’d collided with her was braced above her onall fours, his wavy coffee colored hair flowing free around his handsome face. Well,hello.

“Sorry,”he said again, more softly this time, clearly doing some looking of his own,“I’m—“

Thecrackle of a nearby police radio stunned them both into silence. “This isOfficer Miller, requesting backup. We have two suspects on foot, heading westtowards Logan Circle. My partner and I were separated while pursuing them. Pleaseadvise.”

“They’reafter me!” they hissed in unison. Then, “Wait, they’re after you?!”

Confused,Clarke opened her mouth to start doling out questions, but her fellow criminal beather to it. “Looks like they’re after us, Princess, so what’d you do?” heasked with a conspiratorial grin.

“Princess?Really?” Clarke shot him a look, but answered anyway to expedite the situation.“All I did was tag some asshole’s car,” she said shortly, nodding toward her backpack.“You?”

“Swipedsome food from a fancy grocery store,” he replied. “Unfortunately, I dropped itall on the way here.”

Shecould tell there was more to the story, but now wasn’t the time to makefriends; there was no telling when more cops would show up, or where theofficer’s partner was. Coming to her senses, Clarke grunted, “Get off me!” andshoved the stranger backward.

“Hey!I said I was sorry!” he yelped, scrambling off her and holding his hands up insupplication. “You alright?”

Clarkedusted off her clothes and put her backpack on. “Yeah, just peachy.”

“Here,”he said, shaking his head in amusement, “let me help you.”

Hesitantlyaccepting his offer, she tried not to notice how warm his skin was as he leaneddown and pulled her to her feet. Stop it, Clarke, you don’t even know him.He could be a total creep.

“OfficerMiller?” The tagger and the thief froze as a dispatcher responded to the policeofficer hovering just out of sight. “Back up is on the way. What’s your preciselocation?”

“Thanks,dispatch. I’m on the corner of…”

“Wegotta move,” the man said quietly, still holding her hand.

“What?”she snapped, shaking him off. “What do you mean ‘we?’ ”

“Forsome reason they think we’re together, so it’s probably best that we team upfor now,” he explained. “I can get us out of this, but you’re going to have totrust me.”

Therewere a thousand reasons to refuse, to knock him down and run in the oppositedirection, but something told her that she could put her faith in this man. Somethingfoolish, no doubt. “Alright.”

“Thisway,” he instructed, leading her back the way he’d come. They jogged down thealley between two huge apartment buildings until they reached the next road.Her newfound accomplice peaked out from behind the closest building, makingsure the coast was clear. “Come on, it’s safe.”

“Whichway now?”

“Right.The cop said they were tracking us west, so let’s head north for now.”

Keepingon his tail, Clarke instinctively knew that if she wanted to get out of thisjam, she’d have to stick with the man in black. He carried himself like asolider, tactical and quick on his feet, but he looked pretty young to alreadybe ex-military. If they managed to get away, she’d have to ask him about it.

“I’m Bellamy, by the way,” hecalled over his shoulder.

“Clarke,” she returned.

“Clarke,” he repeated. “I likeit.”

“I don’t care,” she said wryly.“Where are we going?”

“I parked my bike in an alley onfifth,” Bellamy panted, picking up his pace. “It’s close, so if we can just getthere…”

They were on third now, only twoblocks away. Hope bloomed in Clarke’s chest. “Okay! I’m right behind you!”

Bellamy ducked down a side street onthe left, sprinting past the dumpsters and debris littering the way. Matchinghis hurried steps, Clarke ignored the stitch in her side as they neared theirdestination, unwilling to be the reason they got caught. Anything you can do, I can do better… she hummed to herself.

“We’re here!” Bellamy said scantminutes later, sliding to a halt in front of a large wooden palette. “Give me ahand, will you?”

Clarke nodded, moving forward toassist him as she tried to control her harsh breathing. “What do you want me todo?”

“Lift the left side and I’ll getthe right.”

“Got it.” They worked together tomove the heavy palette out of the way, dropping it to the ground a few feetaway. “That’s your ride?” Clarke said dubiously once the shoddy lookingmotorcycle was revealed. The dark purple paint was scraped off in severalplaces and the kickstand looked like it was one good day away from snapping inhalf.

“Yeah,” he said, swelling withpride. “Isn’t she beautiful?”

“She’s something,” Clarke saiddryly.

Kicking his leg over the frontseat, Bellamy rolled his eyes at her lack of enthusiasm. “Do you trust me?” heasked, reaching behind him to produce his gloves and headgear.

“What?”

Bellamy held out a sleek blackhelmet. “Do you trust me?”

“Not on your life, street rat.”

“Well that’s pretty rude of you tosay,” he grinned, tossing the helmet at her before pulling his gloves on. “Kindof childish, in fact.”

Clarke caught the safety gear withease. “Says the man quoting Aladdin.”

“Yeah, yeah. Stop complaining andget on, Princess,” Bellamy commanded, whipping his keys out of his back pocket.“We gotta go.”

“But—”

“Now, Clarke.”

“Fine!” she said indigently, dashingforward to mount the bike. “But only because it’s the expedient thing to do. Don’tthink you can get away with ordering me around under normal circumstances.” Settlingin behind him, Clarke tugged on the helmet and braced her feet on the back pegs.“Happy now?”

“Almost,” Bellamy smirked. “Wrapyour arms around my waist.”

“What?”

“You heard me,” he said a littlegruffly.

Was he embarrassed? Because shesure as hell was. “That’s okay, I’ll just hold onto the seat.”

“It’s safer if you hold onto me.” He looked over his shoulder at her.“Please, I don’t want anything to happen to you.”

Clarke bit her lip, trying not tonotice how attractive he looked with his dark hair falling over one soulfuleye. “Okay, whatever.”

“Thanks, Princess,” he chuckled,twisting the key and revving the engine.

Just then, sirens blazed behindthem.

“Oh, shit! Go! Go!” Clarke cried,wrapping her arms around his waist and holding on for dear life.

Bellamy zipped out of the alley,racing onto the main street and through several red traffic lights. “Holdtight!” he warned, taking a hard left immediately followed by another jerk tothe right.

“If I fall of this motorcycle anddie, I will kill you so dead!” she shouted over the wailing wind.

“Deal! Now shut the hell up andlet me focus on not killing us!”

Clarke pressed her cheek againstthe middle of his muscular back, tightening her grasp until she felt moresecure. Putting all of her trust in a relative stranger was a hard pill toswallow, but for some reason, it was easy with Bellamy. Maybe it was becausethey shared the same occupation and dry sense of humor, but Clarke had neverfelt so in tune with another person before. Whatever the reason, she wassuddenly, inexplicably dreading the end of this little escape attempt. What is wrong with me?!

Swerving to avoid a semi that waschanging lanes, Bellamy swore at the near miss. “Shit, sorry! Looks like trafficis backed up ahead!”

“It’s okay! Just take the nextleft!” Clarke instructed, recognizing a shortcut she’d used a few times toavoid pileups.

Following her directive without hesitation,Bellamy shifted his weight to guide the bike onto the side street and out ofsight of the main road. Clarke let out a breath as the police sirens abruptlydulled to a low hum, indicating that the law had veered off in a differentdirection or were stuck in the mess they’d just avoided.

Bellamy and Clarke rode incompanionable silence for another ten minutes or so before he decelerated to acrawl in front of a shady looking walkup. Pressing a button on the smallcontroller attached to his keychain, Bellamy turned the bike around and linedit up with a set of faded tire prints on the pavement. Amazingly, a basementelevator gradually rose before them, large enough for two people and amotorcycle to squeeze into.

“What the hell?” Clarke gasped.

“Impressed?” he said good-naturedly.

“Getting there.”

Walking the bike forward, Bellamyhit the button again once they were securely inside. It was a littleclaustrophobic, but a few minutes later they were standing in a dimly litbasement.

“Please tell me this isn’t yourmurder room,” she said drolly.

“Not hardly,” he laughed, pluckingthe helmet off her head.

Stepping off the bike, Clarkeshook out her long blonde hair, looking around with interest. “Lights?”

“One sec.” Bellamy lowered thekickstand and stowed his equipment before hitting a switch on the wall.

“Whoa!” she exclaimed when theoverhead lights flickered on, surprised by his high-tech setup. There werecomputers and electronic equipment strewn across several large desks, forming ahalf circle in the center of the room.

“Welcome to the Batcave,” he joked.

“Is all this yours?” she said inawe.

“If only,” he said wistfully. “Thisis actually my friend Monty’s place.”

Clarke raised one pale brow. “Andhe won’t mind that we dropped in unannounced?”

“Nah, he’s family,” Bellamydismissed, striding to the other side of the room and flopping down on abeaten-up old couch.

“Do you do this sort of thingoften then?” she inquired, joining him on the sofa.

“This sort of thing?”

“Rescuing strange women and bringingthem home with you?” she teased.

“Definitely not. I actually have abit of a reputation for avoiding unnecessary entanglements,” he shrugged. “Notthat I don’t care about people, it’s just…hard for me to connect sometimes.”

“I know what you mean,” Clarkesighed, recalling her last few disastrous relationships. “Sometimes I wonderwhy I even try.”

“No kidding,” Bellamy agreed. Histone was odd, stirring her memory of how they had ended up here in the firstplace.

“Bellamy, who were you stealingfood for?”

“Oh, uh, my little sister,” he stammered.“It was stupid, really. I got caught like a rank amateur, but she’s been havinga really hard time lately, and I just wanted to make her happy.” Bellamyfrowned. “Am I making any sense?”

“Yeah.” She knew all aboutirrational behavior. “That car I tagged earlier? It was my ex’s. We’ve beendone for a while, but I guess I needed to get all of my anger out to truly moveon.”

“And…have you?” He looked like hewas holding his breath.

Clarke debated on making him waitfor an answer, but his puppy dog eyes were too irresistible. “Definitely.”

“Good. That’s good.”

“In fact, Bellamy, I think we—”

“Make a pretty good team?” he finisheduncertainly.

Stunned that he’d literally takenthe words right out of her mouth, Clarke stared at him for a space of seconds.“Um. Well, yes.”

Appearing galvanized by heranswer, he continued, “Any chance you’d like to stick around for a while then, Princess?No pressure, but I’d like to get to know you.”

Searching his sincere expression, Clarkefelt compelled to take a chance. “Yeah, I think I would.”

Bellamy slowly covered her handwhere it rested between them, as if testing her reaction. “How about we cleanup and grab some dinner then?”

“Sure,” she smiled, threading herfingers through his. “But you’re stealing.”

-FIN-

——————

A/N: Get it? “But you’re stealing” instead of “But you’re buying!” Ilike to think I’m funny sometimes lol My other Bellarke fic is called “NewBlood” and it’s a grounder AU where Clarke and Octavia battle for the title ofCommander while Bellamy looks on helplessly from the sidelines. Check it out! 

[stormyth-art]

tagged back by @suitcasesoffeathers​!!! (I’m also gonna answer my own questions in this post for @pilotpig​, thank you for being curious!! Haha

Also, sorry for all the long posts lately!!! (I just found out about the keep reading button so I’ll use that from now on!!!

1. If you could meet any fictional character in real life, who would it be and why? 

hmmm, maybe Hermione Granger? Since she could teach me all sorts of stuff about magic and tell me things that happened during the books that Harry was too oblivious of to notice. XD Hermione seems like she’d be more perceptive than him. 

2. If you could magically teleport anywhere (to a real location or fictional location), where would that be and why?

oooh, that’s fun, I’d go to Hogwarts for sure!! That would be so fun!!!

3. If you were in control of the world for a day, what would you do?

maybe just fire Trump and what’s his face vice president guy. lol, I think that’s the only thing I could do and not be scared of the repercussions. 

4. What’s the weirdest dream you’ve ever had?

I’ve had so many weird dreams lol. There is one in particular that was this whole story thing going on, but it would take too long to write the whole thing, so I’ll tell you my favourite part. So, there was this servant boy and he and the princess fell in love and blah blah blah, but eventually he took her to visit his parents in his village. He lived in this rock thing and inside everything was saran wrapped. Th counters, the couches, everything (apparently this was for easy cleanup). So eventually this bell sounded (like a warning bell in medieval times) and that meant everyone had to go and steal food from each other and it was only legal between the first and second bell. The servant guy went off to steal food and everyone was beating each other up and it was terrible and then suddenly servant dude comes rolling down this hill (the village was on a slope) on top of a giant armadillo. He just rolled the armadillo into a convenient sized hole next to his house and claimed the armadillo as his own. (I found it funny when I think about it, but typing it up sounds weird....but I guess that’s the point lol)

5. What do you do when you’re bored?

I usually just complain that I’m bored then rewatch videos I’ve already seen or watch old shows I used to like, or I’ll draw.But lately I’ve been sucked into those top 10 scary videos lol.

6. What’s the dumbest injury you’ve ever gotten? (could be from cuts/scrapes to broken limbs, etc.)

When I was maybe 7 or 8 I was playing a video game with my siblings. It was this super weird racing game on the N64 and I was really into it for some reason, and every time I made a turn I would lean my body in that direction. I was sitting on a wooden stool while playing so the stool would lean too and eventually it just toppled to one side and my head landed right into a stone fire place. It was not fun lol, I still have a scar right next to my temple.

7. Do you have anyone that you really admire/aspire to be like one day? If so, who?

hmmm, I think my parents. A combination of the two. lol, that’s kind of a boring answer but it’s true.

8. Is something that you really treasure that other people may think is dumb?

ohh, there’s this stick I have. lol, I found a stick in the woods when I was 8 and it was the perfect walking stick with a thumb hold and everything. I loved that stick and brought it with me to school sometimes. And when we moved houses I brought it with and I still have that stick in my room and I’ll probably never throw it away at this point. I don’t know why I like it so much. XD

9. What are some positive personality traits that you believe/other people say you have? (no need to be modest ;))

lol, mmm, my parents say I’m creative. My dad says I’m really, thoughtful and have interesting insight about different topics (which I disagree with lol). I’ve been told I’m empathetic and kind and all those things too haha.And every once in awhile I get that I’m funny. (which is cool since I’ve always loved making people laugh and making others happy is what I always strive to do)

10. What style do you usually sport clothes-wise?

mmm, that depends. I love dresses and skirts and girly clothes, but I also love the simple jeans and graphic t-shirt. and then there are days wear I just want to look all boyish and wear baggy pants and oversize shirts. My style is pretty non-existent haha.

11. If you could have a mountain of any food right now, what would it be?

lol! uhh chocolate probably, haha I’m always craving chocolate. I wouldn’t eat an entire mountain of it in one sitting of course though, but it would be nice to have a stash whenever I want some! XD

my own questions:

1. Are there any new hobbies or new skills you want to try/learn?

I’d like to learn violin again as well as get back into photography!

2. Do you believe in anything supernatural? (if you have stories please share, I find them fun to read)

I do lol, it seems no one I tagged does though, which is understandable. I believe in ghosts and aliens (though there is no doubt in my mind aliens exist, I don’t believe any have come to earth. The universe is just so huge there has to be another planet with life on it) I sadly don’t have any stories though.

3. What’s your favourite historical era and why?

I LOVE medieval times. The atmosphere is super cool and it was always my favourite unit in history class in grade school (in highschool when I took an ancient history course we didn’t have time for that unit and it made me mad lol) But I just love history in general so much! It’s so cool to learn about and talk about!! (This is why I’m going to write a time traveling story, since I get to do research about different era’s for it!)

4. What is one of the strangest conversations you’ve ever had?

hmm, this was like, weird for a couple reasons. This was waay back when I was in 9th grade and my friend was in 8th, so I’d go to her school after my school was done and wait for her sometimes. So at one point I was waiting in front of her class and this boy (who I’ve spoken to many times before and he was always fine then) Started asking me “do you like fairy of tails?” over and over and I was so confused what he meant so I asked him “sorry, fairy, of tails????” and he just....rolled away lol. The entire conversations he was rolling around on the walls, flip flopping from one to the other in the hall and then just rolled into his class room.

I later realized he meant the anime fairy tail, which he already knew I liked and cosplayed from so....idk what was going on with him that day. XD

5. Any inside jokes (not with me, just in general)?

‘Imagine this!’ *pretends to open cupboard*  (this one is with rieko lol, it would make no sense to anyone but us) 

6. What quote do you say the most?

the wombo quote from spongebob as well as various other spongebob quotes.

 ‘HE WAS THEIR FRIEND! AND HE BETRAYED THEM!...HE WAS THEIR FRIEND!!!’ from harry potter, I say that all the time lol

7. If you could have any superpower, what would it be and why?

teleportation since that would be so convenient and I could go all over the world for significantly cheaper.

8. Favourite British drama, Korean drama and/or American drama?

British drama: ‘Merlin’

Korean Drama: ‘Good Doctor’ or ‘Hello My Twenties’

American drama: if ‘Stranger Things’ counts then that, if not ‘Once Upon a Time’, the older seasons.

9. Have you ever been in a situation that felt like you were in a movie?

All the time lol. I feel really surreal a lot. There was one time where me and my friend were walking at this park that had a farm on one side and forest with swings and slides and all that on the other (it wasn’t a super dense forest or anything, it was pretty open). We were walking at night and as the forest area came in view we saw a ton of lanterns lighting it up, some were on the ground and some were in the trees. It was weird because the day before there was nothing there. I promptly decided to do what anyone would do and force my friend to go into the forest of lanterns with me. My memories are all mixed up because for some reason I remember it being pitch black in the forest even though there were lanterns.....but anyways, eventually I saw a flashlight, I couldn’t see who was holding it but I could tell someone was coming towards us. I looked at my friend who desperately wanted to leave and I for some reason was feeling brave and wanted to talk to the person (I have no idea what compelled me to, I normally am not like that) When I turned back there was a second flashlight and then my bravery just drained and me and my friend just ran out of there. Next to the forest on the exit we took was a school so we stood in front of the school and then we heard a little girls voice say ‘what are you doing?’ and my friend screamed at the top of her lungs and scared the poor kid who went back inside the school and I laughed so hard and then we went home. lol, it felt like a horror movie but at the same time it was so fun! oh, and then the next day we went back and almost all the lanterns were gone.

10. Any funny things you did as a kid?

I also had elaborate plots for my toys. And I thought grilled cheese was girl cheese and only girls could eat it. I also truly believes ‘stupid’ was the s word. lol. Oh, and I had an obsession with toads when I was little and there were a ton in my neighborhood at the time so I would catch toads a lot.

11. Something you’re looking forward to?

when rieko is less busy and we can hang out and film and all that again lol. (even though was just went skating last week XD)  Also, I’m looking forward to the distant future when I have money and can pay to go to upcoming cons!!