#this is nothing i'm so sorry. had to memorialize this thought process

[ellienchanted]

thinking about glass onion

kathryn hahn!! so good in that movie love her

haha remember that one video where she stares dreamily at rachel weisz. iconic

peak relatable moment™ to so many wlw. 'woman cozily holding cup of tea thinking about getting railed by rachel weisz' etc etc

too bad she's taken! she's married to that one actor you know the one... wait...

DANIEL CRAIG?????

[lyinginmeadow]

Shadows will guide you home | Azriel × reader

Summary: Some fae don't like the idea of the Archerons turning into high fae and reader being one in unfamiliar city makes a perfect opportunity for an intervention Warnings: acotar related violence, not super descriptive, language, slight angst Word count: 1.4k a/n: Hii, this is my very first fanfic, please remember to be kind. <3 Also English is not my first language so it may be a bit rough.

Being another Archeron sister was quite exhausting. The constant comparison between you ever since you were born created a dark place deep within you. After years of being poor, starved, and uneducated, the family regained their riches back thanks to Feyre. The cost left you empty, breaking your heart into a million pieces. You wanted your sister back more than anything, you would return your newfound lifestyle to have her with you again. Taking lessons together, sharing laughs, and pretending as if everything is normal. As if she never left and their father hadn't left them to starvation.

Instead, the Gods were laughing in your face as you with two of your sisters were changed and thrown into the world of high fae. While you got your sister back, there were matters to be taken care of. Leaving you alone in a city and with species foreign to you. You had met the inner circle while you were still human. They were nothing but kind to you then, but you assumed that was because you were Feyre's sister. Now they haven't paid you much mind because their hands were either full with court business you didn't understand or your sisters. You were left scarred inside while pretending it hadn't affected you as much.

''Are you listening?'' Asked a pretty blonde in a red dress, Mor. ''I'm sorry, I just spaced out a little. What were you saying?'' You smiled, red creeping up your cheeks. ''You are free to explore the city, you don't have to feel caged inside.'' She returned your smile. ''Oh, I don't feel like that. I...I guess it's kind of strange to be here. Is there an apothecary around here?''

''Yes, it's in the square just next to the bridge you can’t miss it,'' Mor replied. ''I must go, but I will see you during dinnertime.'' She smiled for the last time as she disappeared into thin air. She came by just to invite you as per Feyre's request. Your sister knew you were too polite to decline any offer and without it you would probably not show up.

''Right.'' You mumbled under your breath as you looked out of the window. In the reflection, you caught the sigh of a shadow. You whipped around to see nothing. Signing, you turned to the window again thinking about certain Illyrian familiar with shadows. When you first met him, he was like a rock that you could lean onto while the queens invaded your home. You talked, feeling an instant connection and thought he felt the same. You didn't remember what happened during the changing process, your brain blocked the memory altogether. But after waking up in Velaris, he didn't seem to notice you, rather seeking the company of your older twin sister.

You knew it wasn't rational to feel hurt by this, but that didn't stop your heart from throbbing. Exhaling a deep breath you went to explore the city as Mor suggested, feeling sick of your little pity party.

After hours spent in the city, it was starting to get dark. Nights here were magical, but your fear of them only amplified during years spent in the dark streets trying to provide for your family by any means necessary, so you tried to hurry back to the house. Taking a turn into an ally wasn't a choice you wanted to make, but panic started to take over every action your body made. Looking around you knew you were lost and didn't know where to go next.

''Looking for something?'' You whipped around with shock in your eyes. ''No, but thank you. My partner is just around the corner.'' You smiled politely your instincts kicking in as you lied smoothly. A shadow caressed your skin as if to soothe your worries and disappeared. You didn't have time to think about it more as the man standing in front of you stepped closer. ''Are you sure? We could help you, Y/N.'' Another dark figure from behind you said so near you could feel his breath on your neck. ''I don't know who you think I am, but that is not my name. And I do not need help from strangers. So let me pass.'' You tried to will your voice not to tremble, but it was of no use. You were starting to give in to the panic rising within you. ''And we don't need humans becoming high fae and highjacking our court. But here you are.'' Said a male in front of you while pulling out a knife. “This will send the message." Continued another one next to what you pressumed was the leader. One againts three were not the odds you prefered.

You had no idea how they found out your name or how they knew of your fate of becoming fae. "Feeling threatened by a female?" You knew getting a rise out of them was not the smartest idea. But maybe it could gain you valuable time for someone, anyone to notice. Velaris was supposed to be peaceful after all.

"You think you're funny, huh? We'll see if you'll find the knife just as entertaining." The male behind you pulled your hair harshly earning a scream from you. You didn't understand how they could blame you for something you had no control over. “Watch the alley, will you?” The male infront of you ordered the one standing next to him as he lifted his hand to your face. The knife danced lightly on your cheek leaving you defenseless. "Just so you know, maiming your face will be a pleasure." He whispered to your ear as he increased the pressure on the knife drawing blood.

The whole alley turned pitch black. You had fae senses, but the dark was completely impenetrable yet familiar. You could only feel your hair being released, knife falling to the pavement, followed by screams and scratches on the stone. You were paralyzed, terrified, and unable to move. The dark had you in its claws and you could feel your breath getting more and more quick. ''How dare you hurt her ?'' A deep familiar voice took you out of your panic. There was no answer to his question. Only whimpers.

The shadows slowly dissolved letting in light from the main streets. There was no one here anymore. Only blood and scratches deep in the stone indicated a struggle.

Azriel appeared in front of you his hands gently grazing your untouched cheek. ''Don't look at it.'' His voice hoarse. You inhaled his scent making you instantly relaxed. ''Are you hurt?'' He asked worry lacing his voice. You gave him a shake of a head not trusting your voice. ''Lies. Shaken. Blood.'' Hissed hushed voice, startling you. ''I am not lying. I am just fine.'' You pushed Azriel away looking around for the source. ''You can hear them?'' Azriel frowned examining you.

''Look, I am sorry you had to bother with this. I know there are a lot of things to be done and I should have known how to protect myself-'' He stopped you from rambling with a thumb to your lips. His previous question forgotten. ''No one has a right to assault you. It is not your fault. Velaris is supposed to be safe. I promise that no one will harm you ever again.'' He left you completely stunned. ''Now, could you please show me where they hurt you, so we can heal it?'' Azriel asked slowly removing his thumb from your lips. Leaving you wishing it could stay there for a bit longer. You pushed back the hair that was covering your healing cheek. ''It's already healing. My abilities do come with very fast healing. As long as I don't use my powers much. I am just a bit shocked, that's all.'' You admitted looking to the stone path. ''Let's get you home then." He offered his hand which you gladly took your heart threatening to jump out of your chest.

''Look, Nesta started training with Cass and a few priestesses joined her. It is a way for them to regain their power and help them with their struggles. I was thinking that maybe it could be something you would give a try?'' Azriel asked as he led you through the house to your bedroom. ''Oh...I think I would like that.'' You smiled. Silence enveloping you again.

''Thank you, Az. For today and the offer.'' You looked down standing infront of the door to your bedroom. ''There is no need to thank me. But you should get some sleep.'' He looked at your door and then down the hallway. ''I will be right next to your room if you need anything. So please, let me know.'' He gave you a look of urgency and you gave him a nod even if you knew you would not. He probably knew it, too. ''Goodnight.''

"Goodnight."

[night-raven-tattler]

First kiss, what bliss... maybe...

Summary: Neither you nor your partner have had your first kiss yet. What kind of shenanigans would that information bring?

Characters: Cater, Jamil, Vil × GN!Reader (separate)

Warnings: misunderstandings

By opening the document, you agree to Mx Tattly's terms of source confidentiality.

-ˋˏ’✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

Facing Cater after what happened felt like the hardest challenge you've ever gone through

Curse Magicam and curse couple tags and couple selfies, curse all of it!

The memory was fresh in your mind, making you cringe at the situation

You just wanted to take a cute selfie with your boyfriend, like any normal person

And you thought it would be funny and cute to kiss him on the cheek mid selfie

But he happened to have the same idea...

And your lips unceremoniously clashed over each other

As if the situation wasn't very embarassing already, Cater's reaction made it worse

He awkwardly laughed while scratching the back of his head, then left the room in a hurry

Horrible feedback for your first kiss, really

Were you that bad at kissing? But you didn't even have time to be bad, it was barely anything but his lips landing on yours

Sevens, even thinking about it made you feel like your face was on fire

You cursed all teen rom coms for lying to your poor teenage heart as you buried yourself under your blankets

But soon enough your phone started buzzing like crazy

One, twice, thrice

Twenty times

You picked it up to check what was going on, when you saw none other than your boyfriend spamming you with apology texts

"i'm sorry" "i'm sorry" "i'm sorry" "i'm sorry" "i'm sorry" "i'm sorry" "i'm sorry" "i'm sorry" "i'm sorry" "i'm sorry"

His apologies only made you more confused

"wait why"

You could tell he was trying to pick between keysmashing his way to forgiveness and trying to find a coherent response as the loading chat bubble appeared and disappeared on your screen for a few minutes

In the end all he sent back was one text

"nvm i'm coming back to ur dorm stay there"

You undug yourself out of your fluffy pity party and, before you could process properly the situation you were in, Cater knocked at your door

You combed your fingers through your hair before taking a deep breath and opening the door

Just to see a Cater just as frazzled as you were

"I'm so sorry I didn't know what to do I wanted to be cute-"

"I was so stupid, I don't know what came over me, I panicked and-"

You talked over each other, then stopped and sunk into a bit of an awkward silence

Not even your conflict solving skills were on your side today

"Uhm, Let's just... I mean, can I come in?"

"I will let you in... before Riddle hears you used 'can' instead of 'may'."

Cater's eyes widened before he snorted, and a small smile blosommed on his lips

"Alright, don't mind me~"

His sing songy delivery came out slightly tense as he hesitated before stepping into your room and making a bee line to your bed

Another awkward, albeit shorter, silence took over the room before you sighed

"Cater, I'm sorry. I wanted to be cute and kiss you on the cheek, I'm sorry if I overstepped something or-"

"Oh, no no no! That's not it at all!"

Cater's cheeks grew redder than you've ever seen them

"You have nothing to apologise for! It's just..."

His eyes went from your face to the floor, then to the lamp on your nightstand

"It took my by surprise, and I was not prepared at all, and I reacted very poorly... It was so much different than what I thought our first kiss to be."

He reached out to his hair and started playing with a strand, something you noticed he did when he needed something to do with his hands

You took a seat next to him on the bed and sighed

"To be honest... I have no idea how I wanted our... first kiss... to be like... Since that was my first and all."

Cater's eyes widened and he snorted

"Yours too?"

Hearing his words, you turned to face him, and saw an expression hard to read

"Wait, what? Really?"

Cater nodded

You snorted, then burst into laugher

He had no idea why, but Cater also joined in with his own confused giggles

"So both our first kisses kinda sucked. Man...!"

Cater lied on your bed, obviously more relaxed than before

"...Well, at least I know I'm not the only victim of the lies about the romcom first kiss."

"You know what they say about misery loving company!"

You lied next to Cater, thinking about how ridiculous everything was

And you were glad to see Cater back to his more relaxed self

"So... No hard feelings, then?"

His question made you giggle

"None. Only if you promise me a proper redo, though."

Cater turned on his side, prompting his head on his arm

"Totally! Not right now, though. My heart had enough of a workout today."

"Same..."

You spent the rest of the day watching cute videos on his Magicam feed

The atmosphere turned back to normal once again, and you almost forgot about the incident

Until a few weeks later, when Cater was finally ready for the proper redo

『••✎••』

You were leaving Sam's and checking items off of a list, making mental notes to yourself

Ingredients for chakli and shankarpali? Check. Enough paper to make origami jasmines until your hands hurt? Check.

The permission slip from Kalim that allowed you and Jamil to stay out of the dorm for the night? Check. The contracts from Azul binding your friends to the responsibility of keeping Kalim in check while you and Jamil are away? Check

Were your preparations a little extreme? Maybe, but you had a very important goal in mind

Several weeks prior, you were bestowed with a very valuable information: Jamil never had his first kiss

Neither did you, but you wanted to do something about it

After a lot of shifts at the Mostro Lounge, you finally were able to put together the perfect date

A picnic under the stars in the garden of Ramshackle dorm, where you could create the perfect opportunity to give your boyfriend the first kiss he deserves!

You skipped on your way to your dorm from excitement and prepared everything for the special night

But whatever deities ruled over Twisted Wonderland decided that it would be funny to cause an unpredictable downpour on the very night you were planning to be out

All Jamil could do to help your disappointed self was to help you gather your things and resume the "picnic" in your dorm room

Despite him trying to comfort you, you still had a hard time recovering, as the night you were so emotionally invested in was ruined

Jamil sighed as it sunk in that the issue was deeper than he thought, and he made you sit down with him

"This wasn't just a normal date, was it? Talk to me, Reader."

You sighed and grabbed Jamil's hand

"I'm just... really disappointed, I guess. I worked really hard to make this date special! And this stupid rain ruined the night. I'm sorry..."

Jamil raised an eyebrow

"Special? Were you preparing something for a special occasion?"

You hated how perceptive he was sometimes

You looked away, and your reaction to his question was all the confirmation Jamil needed

He still waited for you to tell him, regardless of how embarassed you grew with every second of silence

So eventually you caved after what felt like a whole hour of silence

"...You know how you told me you haven't had your... your first kiss?"

Jamil listened to your explanation with a growing blush on his cheeks

"I wanted to make it memorable! I haven't had my first kiss either so I thought it would be great to make it great for the both of us! But then it started raining, and it made the food all soggy, and I just wasted three weeks of my life for a stupid contract with Azul and my friends to make sure Kalim doesn't accidentally start an international conflict while I'm trying to smooch you!"

Your little rant left Jamil speechless

You were expecting some sort of snort or sarcastic remark, but you heard... nothing

So you turned your face to look at Jamil

And he was deep in thought, eyes not even looking at you

His mouth opened and closed a few times

Jamil's face never settled on an expression for too long, his conflicted feelings coming to the surface

The silence was making your nervous, but it was obvious Jamil was weighting his words very carefully

"Reader, I don't need a special setting for you to show you care about me."

"I know you don't need it, but you deserve it! You work so hard all the time and you never get the praise you deserve, I wanted to spoil you as much as I could and give you an unforgettable memory..."

Jamil was rendered completely speechless

And, when your words finally sunk in, his face started burning like a campfire, and he pulled his hood over his head

"You... You are impossible..."

Your hand was still holding his, and you gave it a squeeze in reassurance

The silence that befell on you was just a bit awkward, but you gave Jamil time to recover emotionally

A few minutes passed when he pulled the hood off and asked you to make a pillow fort with him in your room

"I can't let your efforts go to waste, not after... after everything you've said."

Despite your disappointment, you'd never say no to a night with your boyfriend

So you took the chairs, Jamil took the blankets and pillows, and you set up a pretty nice fort

It wasn't the starry sky you imagined yourself sitting under, but maybe Jamil was right

You didn't need anything fancy to have a special moment

And the way he was clinging to you while you were running your fingers through his hair was even more special to you than anything

You chuckled to yourself at the visage of Jamil Viper, the most tense and closed off teen you know, completely making himself comfortable in your embrace as if your body was made to hold him and cherish him

He raised his head, his attention caught by your chuckle

Maybe it was the way Jamil looked more relaxed than usual or the way that he was simply looking at you, expecting nothing but to satiate a small curiosity

But Jamil looked really beautiful to you in that moment

And kissable...

"This is kind of embarassing... I really wanna kiss you right now..."

Jamil smirked at you

"I thought you needed a meteor shower and a full course meal to get a kiss."

"...Never mind, you ruined it."

You were sure he wouldn't let it die until you actually kissed

A problem you could solve really easily

You started plotting another plan; this one was simpler, and it involved just you making him look at you and leaning in a little closer...

『••✎••』

"Did you have any voice acting roles animated movies and stuff?"

Vil contemplated your question for a few seconds while he applied some skin cleanser on his face

"A few, yes. I prefer when people experience my presence fully when I act, but I don't mind bringing a different type of character to life if I like the project."

You were in Vil's room, using your priviledge of being the partner of a Housewarden to spend the night with your boyfriend without the need of a formal pass

As fair as Vil was, he didn't mind your daring actions as they amused him

To pass the time while Vil prepared himself to go to bed, you decided to play 20 questions

"Do you prefer open ended media or do you like to know what comes out of the fate of the characters?"

Vil was good at asking questions, as they really made you fall deep in thought

"Hmm... I think both are pretty great. It depends on the setting the most. An open ending works well with a thriller movie, but I like a proper ending for a romcom."

Your boyfriend hummed at your response

You watched Vil as he reached for his serum, and you caught a glimpse of a smile on his face

"Smart answer. That's the beauty of media, it allows you to tell different kinds of stories in different ways."

Vil opened the serum bottle and let a few droplets fall on his face

"Have you had your first kiss for a role or in real life?"

"Neither."

"Wait. Really?"

Vil snickered at your reaction as he met your eyes through his mirror

"What, is it really that shocking that I haven't had my first kiss yet?"

He was something else: usually people would be embarassed at the prospect of having to admit they haven't had their first kiss at all

"Kind of? I assumed that... well, I know that people who've been acting for as long as you have been exposed to a lot of things before the proper time."

"I can't deny that. I could say that I had a lot of people making sure I never did anything too... extreme."

Vil grabbed his moisturizer, and you had no idea how to feel about losing count of the products he has used so far

While he applied the product, Vil smiled to himself mischievously

"What about you? Have you had your first kiss?"

Your cheeks warmed up in embarassment

"No..."

Your reply was followed by an awkward laugh, and it drew a chuckle out of Vil

For the first time in a while, Vil got up from his chair and sat on his bed next to you, leaning closer

His closeness to you and your confession made your cheeks grow hot

The floral scent of his freshly applied products and the teasing glint in his eyes made you dizzy

"Oh? Is that so?"

Your confusion suddenly vanished as you realised what Vil was about to do

Were you about to kiss?! Right now?!

Vil leaned in very close to your face while you panicked and tried to figure out what to do

He kept a distance of barely two centimeters for a few seconds

Then he kissed your nose, making you confused

"You've been able to go on this long without your first kiss, you'll be fine waiting a little longer..."

You were shocked as Vil backed away with a smile on his face and cheeks dusted pink

It finally dawned on you: he was only teasing you

He only laughed when you gave him a swat to his thigh, wordlessly accepting your offense as warranted

The audacity of this guy...

"You really though I'd allow our first kiss to be anything less than spectacular? My line of work has been advertising a life changing moment, and I feel it's my duty to... live up to the hype."

Your indignation, as lighthearted as it was, refused to allow your pride to be wounded by such teasing

You raised yourself from your spot and, with a courage fueled only by impulsivity, you put your hand at the back of Vil's neck

You pulled Vil close to your face, action that earned you a gasp from your beloved

Almost all courage left you but you still continued with your plan: you waited a few seconds before pressing your lips to the corner of his mouth

"Your... line of work also has teasers and trailers, right? Consider this one of them."

Vil was more than shocked; to your surprise, he seemed awestruck by your actions

A lovely pink took over his face as a proud smile bloomed on his features

"Maybe I will."

『••✎••』

[nephilimbrute]

ok since you guys don't know anything about my agent 8's personality, i'm doing a huge infodump on them. enjoy

Agent 8; they/them, nonbinary — 24 as of current time, in a relationship with Agent 4 and Captain 3

they're pretty, but also one of the worst people you'll meet. everyone who met them has had something terrible happen to them, basically a bad omen...yet they still think they're a saint! 8 is very narcissistic, but also very self-critical. they think they can be the only one to do something, that they're the best at it...but they know this is wrong, so they hate themself for it

they think they're a very fragile and innocent being, like a deer. they want to live a calm and steady life, no excessively loud or overwhelming sounds and music, just them and their close ones. they enjoy writing poetry and creating art to the likes of vincent van gogh, but also impressionism in general. they have a very bad memory now, so they want to capture the present time as best as they can if it ever gets worse. often times, 8 thinks about any big events that are coming up in the near future (concerts, festivals, etc.). they don't like to think about the future outside of these things (was team present if that wasn't obvious)

they used to be full of emotion, expressing and voicing their thoughts well. but slowly over time, they've became numb to most things to prevent themself from being embarassed by...sadness. they think being upset is embarassing, and are easily annoyed by gloomy people. they have such little sympathy, but it still exists. they are capable of love! it's not hard to crack through their shell, nor do they even have one. 8 themself is aware of how they've changed over the years, and they want to go back to how they used to be; loving, sympathetic, mindful of others. they do feel very sorry for the change in their personality, but the partial sanitization that was done to them makes it difficult to revert to their old self

8 feels like they're putting up a front when they want to be nice, and, they can be compassionate and apologetic sometimes. they deeply wish for anyone who recognized them pre-octo expansion to forgive them, even if they did nothing wrong

because of the whole octo expansion situation, 8 has developed truman syndrome, paranoia, and heavily dislikes anything involving a smart AI or robotics. this is one of the reasons why marina pisses them off so badly. to 8, they think that they've caused no harm, and every mistake they've done was not entirely their fault. they make a lot of people uncomfortable in some way without touching anyone or saying anything. despite all that, they respect people's personal space a lot!..other than pearl and marina, who they used to watch sleep before being kicked out

now, onto their relationships. 8 is doing fine with agent 4, he's nice to them so they like him... but so is cap3, yet 8 might be one of the worst things that ever happened to her. cap3 really wants some alone time and hates being stared at, and 8 does the exact opposite of that. they don't touch her at her request, but they Will stare at her whenever she's doing anything, at any given time. they don't process in their mind that they want to make her uncomfortable, they just sort of...do?

^ i only limited this to a bit so i won't delve Too deep and go off topic. you can ask about that if you want

i guess you could say they have some kind of parental issues? i don't know, they can't remember who their biological parents are anyways. they have a strong attachment to marina though, can't decide if they wanna be her or want her to adopt them. kind of "eh" with pearl, still respects him nonetheless

congratulations! if you've read until the end, here's a human 8 doodle :3

[sims3fiend]

Some dumb sims 3 updates/stuf

Or, how to develop severe brain damage in 10 easy steps.

Sooo… This is going to be more of a blog post than anything of any real substance, more of a whinge with maybe a few teasers for some stuff I may or may not release (probably not). Feel free to skip if you're after hot tips or coherent writing.

Stutter "fixer"

Sooooo…. The sims 3 has some stutter issueeesss… Incredible discovery, I know! I started looking at remedying them with settings, found some hidden settings that help reduce some of the issues but that can only do so much when the game was made in 2009 for 2009 computers.

So I had a looky at some things I thought could be causing it, mainly WinAPI functions because that's the easier route (h-haha…), and started to try to "optimize" some of the more common ones:

ReadFile: Was the first, and looking at the sheer volume of like 12783972198 calls a milisecond every time you move the camera, I thought surely I can speed it up a little r-right. Not really. I tried all sorts of… interesting things, file caching in memory, implementing the overlapped flag (took ages), etc. Oh and the performance increase? Literally nothing. It's called weirdly from wherever it's called and so we must suffer.

Threads: So, I had a look at other areas that were potential targets for speedup, ran an actual profile and it showed a problem areas namely threads and some other stuff I don't remember. ZwWaitForMultipleObjects and WaitForSingleObject take up a lot of time, so I very poorly attempted to optimize them, adding some timeout optimizations (and a bunch of other failed attempts). Despite being the most insane, this actually worked, and I got like a 40% speed increase in a very very niche metric that did not noticeably effect the game one single bit. I plan to combine all my failures into a single script eventually, maybe once combined they'll do something…

Actual insanity - Memory IPC: Then I had an idea, everyone hates e12, why don't we shove the games memory into another process and that'll fix it. No brain moment. No clue what past me was thinking, for some reason I thought you could like, access another processes memory if it was spawned from it, but uhh.. no, that's not how things work… I tried a few other things in a similar vein but it just crashed and crashed, so for now I'm just gunna work on:

Alloc/free mee - Current insanity: Currently, I'm still working on VirtualAlloc and VirtualFree (which is what I was redirecting to another process), but more from an optimizing memory usage standpoint than a… whatever the IPC thing was. There's a lot of things to try, and I've had some luck in some areas and some abysmal failures in others. There's a few promising functions calling VirtualAlloc/Free that seem to be potentially pointing towards memory leaks (004e54d0), but I'm too dumb to investigate that. At the moment, I'm going mostly just gathering more logs which takes forever and hurts my brain real bad.. On testing there's like 180 allocs that we could probably yeet no problem, which is like 750mb saved… Maybe idk.

I have plenty of ideas for deduplication, memory pool implementations to reduce churn/fragmentation, shoving things aggressively into pagefiles if they're not being used, etc. etc. Basically, there's a lot of avenues to explore, and I feel like there's potential… though I've definitely said that before and been dead wrong so…

Anyway, rambling over. I plan to release a dumb little renderer settings mod maybe-soon-ish that'll let you do dumb stuff that might be useful for reshade like turn shadows/drop shadows off and post processing off and on. I guess I could add max lots and other settings eventually too since they're static values.... Might also do a mythbusting post for some performance "tweak" stuff I see thrown around that isn't super accurate but I also don't want people to be angry at me so maybe not.

Sorry to whoever read all this, but also thanks :)

[nthee]

I DON'T KNOW IF I'MA SEE YOU AGAIN . . .

summary: a slight, or well, not-so-slight blunder led to the unfortunate events of him losing his memory — his memory of you and anything related to you.

characters: riddle roseherts, silver, lilia vanrouge

contains: angst with a bit of fluff, gender-neutral mc (uses second person view aka "you"), the reader blushes (described to be flushed)

notes: title is from see you again hehe :) i just thought it kind of had amnesia trope vibes idkkk dont ask me why atp, inspo comes from anywhere fr. also SURPRISE IM BACK let's ignore the fact that it's been 5 months tho i was so burnt out :(

⌗ RIDDLE ROSEHEARTS

“Let me help you with that. [...] What? You're staring.”

“Ah, it's... it's nothing, sorry.”

The close proximity is enough to make you go insane. Perhaps it's better if you just took the time to actually fix your tie this morning. That way, he wouldn't be so close! So close that...

Oh Seven, what if he hears my heartbeat?! Ack, calm down, calm down! I don't want to scare him of, what if he thinks it's — I'm creepy?!

“You seem flushed, [Name]. Are you alright?” his movement stills while holding onto your tie, and you mentally facepalm.

Riddle's hand makes its way to your forehead, the back of his hand pressing onto your skin, before realizing he's wearing gloves. He clears his throat at the mistake, opting to feel your temperature using the back of his wrist — the exposed skin between his sleeve and glove.

“Temperature is normal... a little bit warm, but nothing serious.”

“I'm alright! It's nothing, really.”

Too close, too close, too close!

Riddle retracts back, almost as if he could hear your pleas. He sighed, clearing his throat as his eyes wander around — look everywhere, anywhere but them, Riddle.

“I should — ah, we should get to class...” you reminded. You mirror his actions, averting your gaze.

“Right. Class.”

He offers an arm, one that you graciously take without a second thought. “Let me escort you there. I did hold you off for several minutes.”

Excuses! Riddle's mind yells. You're falling for them!

He doesn't care in the slightest — just as long as you're there to catch him. Though he knew you for a grand total of five days, he knows you'll be there.

⌗ SILVER

“Have I... met you before? I have, haven't I?”

A bittersweet laugh escapes your lips, startling Silver in front of you. You pull yourself together, smiling as you gaze into his eyes — the same eyes you'd lose yourself in, letting the time pass doing just that.

“Once upon a dream, right? That's what you were going to say?” you wipe a tear from the corner of your eye, thankful you laughed first before the waterworks arrived. Thank goodness, he can't see me sad.

Silver's eyes brightened, his eyelashes fluttering in disbelief. “It's... it's you. I meet you in my dreams! Everytime I close my eyes, I... I see you.”

His hands are softly holding yours as he speaks, his thumb tracing your skin delicately — like you were glass, or a treasure. It's enough to make you swoon, just as he's always done before.

“Don't leave my side.”

He thinks it's selfish to ask that from a stranger. But you are no stranger. You know the truth, but he suspects it's destiny — that you've actually met, talked, danced before, only well, it was in his very own dreamland.

You can feel the tears again. Maybe this isn't so bad? Or, at the very least, this isn't the end.

“I wouldn't even think of it.”

⌗ LILIA VANROUGE

“Are you a friend of Silver's? I don't think I've seen you around before.”

Those words were uttered before you could even process the initial news of Lilia's predicament — before your heart could even let it sink in.

You could only choke back the words threatening to slip off your tongue, lest it sound like utter crap to someone who just lost his memories.

You and I are more than friends. You play— well, played lighthearted tricks on me. I fell for them. I fell for you.

“You... could say that,” was all you could muster up. There was no point in explaining more, he wouldn't understand them.

There was understanding to his nod, a subconscious feeling of something nestled deep in his heart.

“Are you troubled? You seem to be.” his tone is soft, yet firm. Lilia had always been that way; a mentor, father (or, father-like to ones who don't know he was actually one), shoulder to cry on, wise fae to depend on...

A lover. Was a lover.

Now, all was left was Lilia before he even got to know you.

Lilia Vanrouge, a schoolmate of yours, once again.

← | © nthee, do not repost, plagiarize, translate, adapt, and use my work in anything that associates directly with ai.

[girlgenius1111]

i wake up screaming from dreaming

ingrid engen x reader

reader has a nightmare. ingrid picks up the pieces.

It was a common dream for you to have- you'd never had a good relationship with your parents. You often thought back to the culmination of this poor relationship; the night they threw you out, spewing awful, hateful things at you. You'd long ago given up trying to stop the replaying of this event in your nightmares. It had been years, and it still plagued your dreams.

You'd never had it before around another person, though. You'd had relationships before but you'd never spent enough time with the other person for them to happen to be there when you the memory visited your dreams. It wasn't like that with Ingrid.

You'd been together for only a few months, but already, you knew what you had with her was different. She knew you more than most people did, having an odd ability to see through you when you pretended to be fine. She didn't know everything, but all that she did know, didn't scare her off. The Norwegian always seemed like she wanted to know more, in fact.

Still, when you startled awake to the sound of her voice calling your name, rousing you from the horrifying memory, you couldn't help the fresh wave of fear that washed through you.

You were drenched in sweat, breathing hard, and looking around frantically. It was obvious to Ingrid what had happened, and she could tell how panicked you were, even with how out of it you seemed.

"Y/n, elskling," Ingrid called softly, careful not to touch you when you were in such a state. You looked at her from where you were propped up on your elbows, eyes wild. She reached over to the bedside table, flicking on the lamp, squinting as the light filled the room.

"Ingrid," you said breathlessly, as if just now really processing that she was there. Ingrid hated the look on your face, as if you were shocked that she was still laying next to you.

"Yeah, I'm right here," she said soothingly. Tentatively, she reached out a hand. You responded by all but launching yourself across the bed into her. She took your weight easily, leaning back and letting you settle on top of her. She could feel your chest stuttering with every inhale, and she began to run her nails up and down your back.

"It was just a dream, elskling, you're here with me, and you're completely safe," she murmured into your ear, feeling you nod against her chest. Being pressed up against her was calming you down fast; her long arms wrapped tightly around your body, holding you securely to her.

"Sorry for waking you," you gasped out.

"Don't be sorry, I'm glad I woke up," Ingrid shushed you. She sounded so sweet, so genuine. "Do you want to talk about it?" She asked, tone telling you that it was okay if you didn't.

"Not right now," you told her, wanting nothing more than to forget everything about the dream.

"That's okay. What about a warm shower?" she asked, wanting to find something that would make your body stop trembling.

At this, you pushed up off of her, rolling back to your side of the bed, face flushing red.

"I'm sorry, I'm all gross," you panicked, "I'll go shower now." You moved to get out of the bed, even as a little of the panic began to return now that you weren't inhaling the scent of Ingrid; pine and pear that made you feel safe.

Ingrid stopped you, though, with a gentle hand wrapping around your wrist. "No, kjære, that's not what I meant."

You looked at her, thick hair sleep tousled, but expression alert, awake. You didn't understand. Ingrid's heart ached at the how your bottom lip quivered, watery eyes hesitantly meeting hers.

"I thought a shower might calm you down, but if you want to stay laying here with me, that's fine to," she told you delicately.

"A shower sounds nice," you said faintly, again moving to stand up from the bed. Ingrid let you this time, and you walked shakily into the bathroom. The soft patter of footsteps behind you caused you to turn around, and you looked at Ingrid in confusion.

"Let me help," she insisted, stepping around you to turn the shower on. You did, allowing her to undress you and tie your hair up, before she absentmindedly tugged her own clothes off, attention completely focused on you.

"Ingrid, you don't have to," you started, but the brunette interrupted you, as she pulled her hair up into a loose bun.

"I want to," she said simply, and you decided to stop arguing as she pulled you into the shower. You reached for the soap, but she stopped you, guiding you to lean back against her under the stream of warm water.

"Just relax, jenta mi," she soothed. You hadn't realized you were still shaking, until Ingrid's arms were stilling your movements, and the warm water was washing over you. You let your eyes slip shut, leaning back against your girlfriend. "There you go," she murmured, leaning down to kiss your temple lightly.

After a few minutes, once your body had stopped trembling, Ingrid released you, fighting back a smile at the noise of complaint you let out. She grabbed the soap, lathering your body in it, her hands movement gently across your skin. She was so careful, so intentional with her movements, it made you feel loved, cherished. You stepped back under the spray, rinsing off, and she pressing you back into her chest, hands splaying out across your bare back. She completely enveloped you, your smaller frame fitting against her, tucked away.

It was so peaceful, in the dimly lit bathroom, the warm water raining down on you both, and your eyes fluttered shut once again. You didn't realize you started to drift off, through, until Ingrid pulled back, cupping your face with her hands, and pressing a peck to your lips.

"Don't sleep yet, let's get out of the shower first," she told you, and you could hear the amusement in her voice. You grumbled, but let her tug you out of the shower and dry you off. Your eyes remained closed, body following Ingrid's lead, until you felt her fingers lightly tap your cheek. You blinked open, finding her emerald eyes looking down at you.

"Wake up," she teased. "I'm gonna get some clothes, don't fall over,"

You nodded, fighting to keep your eyelids from falling shut. She left and returned quickly, and you felt a rush of emotion, of love, when she wordlessly helped you pull on a pair of her shorts and one of her shirts. Once she had pulled on clothes of her own, you sagged into her, completely drained. She supported your weight easily, leading you out of the bathroom, across the soft carpet, and back into bed.

You felt refreshed, calm, and so comfortable as you settled under the covers, resting your head on Ingrid's chest, scooting right up against her side.

The Norwegian was content to lay there with you, in silence, until you fell back asleep, which she assumed would be soon based on how you'd almost drifted off standing up in the shower. She lazily ran her fingertips up and down your arm, feeling sleep tug at her too.

She jolted slightly when you shifted, scooching up to rest your head higher on her shoulder, until your breath tickled the skin of her neck.

"Love you," you mumbled into her shirt, already half asleep, but unwilling to drift off until you'd made sure Ingrid knew how much you appreciated her.

Ingrid melted a little at your sleepy voice. "I love you too, elskling," she promised.

You allowed yourself to drift off, then, confident that if another nightmare found you, Ingrid would be there to bring you back to earth.

-----

writing about ingrid but not with mapi feels... incorrect. anyway here is something short and sweet :)

[castiwls]

enchanted .ᐟ

Paring; sam x reader

Prompt; 'I'll spend forever wondering if you knew. I was enchanted to meet you'

Requested; @4catsinacult

Notes; the adhd is bad rn but I'm trying to get back into writing (its a slow process sadly)

also requests are open again!

Masterlist | Taylor Swift masterlist

The last time you’d seen Sam Winchester you were 15. You’d been knee-deep in your own self-proclaimed ‘awkward phase’ that you’d spent the whole two weeks hiding from both him and his brother. 

However, you’d quickly found out that the younger Winchester was more than determined to befriend you before your time together was up. You’d been nothing short of a blushing, stuttering mess the first time he’d cornered you outside your dad’s motel room. He’d been quick to invite you to a diner with him and his brother claiming that he needed ‘company from someone who didn’t hit on anything that breathes’

Safe to say you’d been smitten almost immediately. Even at 15, you’d known that Sam Winchester was very possibly the guy of your dreams. He’d been…different to all the other boys your age, he’d rather talk about whatever book had been in your bag when you’d met at the diner over thinking of how long it would take to convince you to make out - a situation you were annoyingly more than used to. 

You’d spent those few weeks in your own little bubble almost. You’d finally found someone who had taken a genuine interest in you yet all that wonder had been over shadowed by the fact that these feelings were teenage feelings. 

You’d simply put your feelings down to heightened teenage emotions and you’d pushed down the hurt upon leaving the two once the hunt had been over.

8 Years later Sam Winchester was but a distant memory. You’d briefly heard through contacts that both were still alive and in the businesses (something which filled you with more relief than you'd ever admit) yet physically they were nothing but two ghosts of your past.

You’d never imagined the next time you’d come face to face with him would be over a dead body. The morge was only small - barely big enough for the two of you alongside the long table meaning that you had no choice but to stand uncomfortably close.

Sam, it seemed had only grown into his looks over the last ten years and you could only pray that the warmth that pooled in your stomach had not also become visible on your cheeks. 

“So…” You mused watching him inspect the body. “It’s been a while?”

Sam hummed looking up, a small smile pulling at his lips. His own heart had almost beat out of his chest when you’d appeared in the doorway and the sound of your voice after all this time only elevated it more. “Yeah.” He nodded mentally cursing himself as you both fell into a slightly uncomfortable silence. 

‘Yeah?’ You were finally in the same room as him after almost a decade and the only thing he could say was ‘yeah’. Talking to girls had never really been an issue yet suddenly coming face to face with you made him feel like an awkward 15-year-old again who could barely get out two words to a girl before turning bright red.

“I’m sorry about your dad.” You broke the silence, tapping your pen against the pad in your hand. Sam looked back up, placing his hands on the table. “Thanks.” He rubbed a hand across the back of his neck, letting out a quiet breath. 

You both lapsed into quiet as he continued to look over the body while you noted anything of importance. “How did you find out about…” He gestured to the body as he binned his gloves. “Oh…your brother actually.” A frown tugs at your lips as you recall the phone call you’d received earlier in the day. “Said he was sick and didn’t want the case to go undelt with.” 

Sam’s eyebrows drew together for a moment as he thought. “Dean called you?” A frown pulled at his lips. Why would the dean have called you to help? He could well and truly handle this on his own….oh. 

A quiet groan left him as he pressed a hand to his head. Dean barely listened to him most of the time and the one time he does it's about a girl he had a crush on ten years ago. 

“You okay?” Concern flashed in your eyes as you followed him to the door. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine just…Dean being Dean.” He shook his head sending you a smile as he held the door.

“I’m guessing he’s not changed much, judging by that groan.” You teased lightly as you both passed the reception desk. Sam laughed. “No. No, he’s not changed at all, just about as mature as a 19-year-old still.”

A laugh left your own lips as you reached your car, leaning against it you turned to Sam. A quiet noise left you as you realised just now how close he suddenly was. You held up your notebook. “I…i can send you all the notes.” You mumbled, praying your cheeks weren’t currently burning up.

Sam nodded looking over your shoulder for a moment. “Yeah…yeah, that would be great.” You were so close, if he just shifted ever so slightly his chest would press against yours. 

He’d dreamt of being this close to you when you were both teenagers, but no dream could replace how it actually felt to have you less than an arm's reach away. Yet he still had absolutely no idea how you felt.

Throughout those two weeks you’d never once openly showed any sort of attraction - something which had given him more than one sleepless night. 

Even now, ten years later those feelings seemed to return, leaving him light-headed and struggling not to trip over his own words. 

Yet you seemed completely unbothered.

“We…we could go over them together?” You suggested after a moment. “If Dean’s sick i doubt you're gonna get any peace.” You took a breath waiting almost anxiously as he seemed to think it over.

Time seemed to stretch and you were just about to make an excuse to leave when he nodded. “Sure. I’d like that”

—

Three hours later you found yourself spread out over the covers of the motel's bed. A notebook was placed beside you as you slowly scrolled through an article on your laptop. 

Sam had taken residence on the small table, his own papers were strewn out across the surface. “You know it's funny, the last time I saw you, you were doing the same thing.” You smiled leaning your chin on your fist. 

‘It’s cute’ You thought to yourself as he chewed on a pen for a moment. He suddenly looked up, his eyes wide. “Did-” He pulled the pen from his mouth. “Did you say something?” His cheeks flushed slightly as he placed the pen down. You’d been quiet for so long he’d honestly forgotten that you were in the room. 

“I was just saying how it's funny the last time I saw you, you were doing the exact same thing.” You gestured to the table with your free hand. Sam hummed. “Well, when I was 15 I was doing school work, now I'm…” He looked down at the paper, raising an eyebrow. “Trying to find out if vampires are currently hunting.” He laughed slightly - the situation still being slightly insane even if you were both more than used to it.

You nodded, a comfortable silence covering the room as you both simply stared for a moment. Biting down on your lip you cleared your throat. “It's sweet.” The words leave your lips before you can process it and almost immediately you feel your cheeks heat. “It’s… it's sweet that you still enjoy it.” You stumbled over your words praying to whatever was above that the floor would just open up then and there.

Sam watched, his heart seeming to grow as you buried your face into your hands, your feet falling flat on the bed behind you. “I don’t know why I said that.” Your voice was muffled as you spoke.

Sam felt a smile grow as he closed his laptop - the sight of you flustered slightly too endearing. “No. No, it's fine.” He stood moving to sit beside you on the bed. You peaked up from your arms. 

You stifled slightly as his palm landed on your back, rubbing small circles. “I don’t think i’ve actually ever had anyone call me sweet so thats a new one.” He mused, his tone light. 

You laughed quietly, almost melting into the bed as his hand continued to move. “It’s late. You wanna go get food?” Sam asked after a moment, his own heart still beating faster because you were letting him touch you like this. Hell, you’d just openly complimented him he truly felt as if he was on cloud nine.

“Yea. Yea, food is good.” You nodded shifting to sit up. You stood, still feeling the flush from your earlier blip. You moved - intending to go check just how red you’d become in the bathroom when a hand wrapped around your wrist.

His hand circled your wrist, the skin heating as he gently pulled you to stand between his legs. Sam’s smile had only grown softer as he looked you over for a minute. “If it makes you feel any better, I have definitely said worse in front of girls.” He reassured, his hand still wrapped around your wrist. 

He really had not changed, if you squinted you could almost see the same boy you’d met 10 years ago. 

“You were always so hard to read.” His voice was quiet as he spoke, his eyes dancing over your face. “Even when we were kids I…I could never figure out if you felt anything but…” His eyes lingered on your lips for a moment.

“You thought I was hard to read?” You cut him off. You thought that you’d been pretty open (much to your disdain) about your huge crush on him when you’d been a teen. You’d spent those two weeks doing everything in your power to appear normal yet you'd still lay in bed kicking yourself after each day.

“Sam, I thought you were hard to read.” 

He chuckled shaking his head. “Truthfully, those two weeks were torture. I wanted you to like me so bad.” He admitted quietly looking away. He wanted you to be more than just like him. He always had and the way you’d acted after calling him ‘sweet’ almost gave him hope.

“Of course I liked you.” Your hand guided his gaze back to your own. “I’ve always liked you, I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t” Your finger traced his cheek for a moment.

His eyes finally met yours and the room seemed to melt away until it was just you both left. His hand never left your wrist as he tugged you slightly closer, your knees hitting the bed. 

“Can I kiss you?” He mumbled, lips parting as his free hand pushed your hair back. 

“Please.”

[lokideservesahug]

Obsessed In Love II

-°•°•°•°•--•°•°•°•°--°•°•°•°•--•°•°•°•°-

Pairing: Yandere! Checo Pérez x gn!reader

Warnings: Dark themes, yandere, hints to drugging, kidnapping, suggestive, badly translated Spanish (sorry)

Notes: You asked for a part 2 so I had to deliver... And just imagine both Checo and the reader live in the same country as the race because that's one if the only ways that the start will make sense. Also I'm working on a Mark Webber request so hopefully that will be out at some point!

Summary: What happens when you wake up in a random bed with no recollection of the day before. You just accept it because nothing weird could have happened...right?

Part 1

-°•°•°•°•--•°•°•°•°--°•°•°•°•--•°•°•°•°-

You wake up with a huge headache and in an unfamiliar place. Well not wholly unfamiliar, the top of the bedpost looks slightly familiar. You give it some thought and realise that Checo has a similar bed if not the same one. Not that you keep track of Checo's bed or anything... You had seen Checo's bedroom in the occasional Red Bull mandated video call here and there but that was about it. Despite your close relationship on track, that was it. A truly professional work relationship that unfortunately didn't extend to many outside of work hours or walls (as much as Checo had tried to invite the whole team out just to see you there). You feel very grogy waking up and can't remember much of the end of the previous day. After you finished filming the video, your memory becomes cloudy.

You groan and stop yourself from trying to remember too much of yesterday else it will give you a headache. You go to get out of bed, still not fully processing the fact that you werent in your own room only to find you were caged in by something heavy lying around your waist. Your eyes widen. Oh no... you weren't alone. You curse at your foolishness of not realising that of course you'd be with someone else if you were in a foreign room. You lift the person's arm up (damn they had nice muscles) and turn on your side to see if you recognised the person beside you. The last thing you'd have ever expected dthough was to see your boss. Sergio Pérez. "Oh sh-" He groans slightly at your disturbance of the peace and sleepily adjusts himself so he's lying with one leg draped over you, face buried in the side of your chest.

At his sudden change in scenery, he begins to wake up. You wait with baited breath to see his reaction and as his sleep drowsed eyes meet yours, you swear you see a small smile flash across his lips before he sports a similar shocked face to your current one. He rubs his eyes and sits up and as he repositions, you note that his leg is still touching yours. He smirks and begins to speak in an odd attractive, rapsy morning voice (gosh you shouldn't be having these thoughts) "Not that I don't want you in my bed but what are you doing here querida?" You shake your head and shrug.

"I-I don't know..." You try and cast your mind back to last night when your predicament finally settles. You. Your boss. Alone. In his bed. You gasp. "You don't think we...?" His eyebrows raise at your suggestion. You avoid his eyes and feel the flutter of your heartbeat at the thought. You'd always had a thing for him (not that you'd even admit it to yourself). He shakes his head. "I hope not." You feel yourself frown and physically deflate at his words. You can't help it. "Wait no, querida I don't mean it like that..." You turn and face him and raise an eyebrow in curiosity. "It's just- well. Never mind." He looks down almost embarrassed and you scoot closer to him. "Go ahead. I won't judge." He meets your eyes again and smiles softly. "Please forgive me if I'm being to forward but I just feel like a moment like that would be magical and I just wouldn't want to forget that."

You're left speechless at his words and feel your cheeks warm. You identity your mouth to say something but he cuts across you. "You don't need to say anything I just wanted to get that off my chest." You nod and smile at him. "Now what kind of a host would I be if I didn't make breakfast for you?" You laugh softly at his words and tilt your head in amusement. His smile widens at your clear enjoyment if his words and so he continues. "You stay here Querida and I'll go and make some breakfast for us." He leaves the room, closing the door with a gentle click. You stretch out and enjoy the feeling if his soft bedding (that smells exactly like his cologne that you've noticed often in your time working for him) whilst you look around at his room, taking in all of the new sights.

☆-☆-☆-☆-☆

Checo made a wonderful breakfast and after he beconed you to the dining room, you lost track of time just talking. So much so that when you look at the time, you realise that you need to arrive at red bull hospitality in less than an hour. "Shit." You curse your luck as you look down at your clothes still from yesterday. Checo raises his eyebrows at your profanity and you explain to him. "I need to go and get changed for FP1 and I think my house is too far away!" You scramble out of the chair and through the doorframe you went through as you came downstairs.

You don't when clock Checo's distant calls until hes right behind you as you bend down to put your shoes on. "Cariño, there's no use. You won't make it on time." You hang your head in shame and finally accept what you refused to moments ago. "However, I do have some clothes lying around that I'm sure would fit you and you could wear to work!" You meet his eyes and cast him a grateful look.

☆-☆-☆-☆-☆

Checo end up giving you an entire set of new clothes after you shower and wash your body (as per his instructions). In your still stresses haze, you don't question why he has clothes lying around his house that really do fit you well. You're impressed that he gives you an entire outfit. Well bar a shirt but he says that you'd be fine just to wear one of his red bull shirts. You put on the Red Bull shirt (unsurprisingly his own merch with a little SP11 over the right breast) and you try and style the slightly baggy shirt. When you exit his bedroom where he let you change, you fail to notice the hungry pair of eyes or the ravenous,possessive gaze that comes with them.

☆-☆-☆-☆-☆

Checo was kind enough to drive you and when you eventually reach the doors of Red Bull hospitality, you're on time to the minute. You ignore the suspicious glances that everyone is casting the both of you for arriving together and you head to your office to get the schedule for today.

You walk back out to the foyer and are greeted by Max. You smile and wave at him, exchanging a few pleasantries as your eyes scan the room and doorways for Checo. You find him in the adjacent room and as Max's on assistant comes to tech him, you walk over to Checo. He's hunched over his phone with a prominent scowl on his face. "Are you ready to go to your driver's room?" You ask the Mexican. He perks up at your words and nods as he walks off to get changed.

☆-☆-☆-☆-☆

FP1 goes by with next to no issues. There is a good variety of cars performing well at the track and unsurprisingly, both the red bulls have good pace. You sit down. You've been feeling a bit dizzy all throughout the day and can't help but have a small inkling in the back of your mind that this isn't the first time this has happened today. By the time both Free Practise sessions and all team meetings have ended, you go to see Checo in his driver's room. You knock gently on the door and wait.

The door opens with a soft click. "Hello querida. Come in." He gestures you inside and you take a seat at one end of the sofa. You continue to talk. You find yourself caught up in a large rant with Checo not responding to anything. You turn to look at him only to notice his eyes firmly set on you. "What? Is something wrong?" He just shakes his head and you watch as his eyes give you a quick glance up and down. Suddenly, you become hyperaware of your close proximity and before you can give it any more thoughts, your lips meet with his.

You whine softly at the contact and thread you hand into his hair. He puts a hand gently on your waist as you pull apart for air. You look into us eyes and can't help but blush at what just happened despite where you found yourself this morning. He places his hand gently under your jaw and tilts your head back up. You meet his dilated pupils and he jumps straight back in to a much more passionate kiss this time filled with more tongue. The two if you fight for dominance with your mouths but in the end it is him that wins and the two of you continue to kiss until you feel a slight thrombin in your head. You pull back and smile at the man. "Sorry. I've just been having the worst headache all day." He nods sympathetically. "I get it cariño. You You rest for a bit and I'll wake you once I've finished the right up for today and we can go home. You forget about your surroundings as you lean your head tentatively against his shoulder. You see him pick up his laptop on the side table and continue to type. As you drift out of consciousness you swear you can hear a low mumble of what appears to be "Eres toda mía ahora, ¿no?" Followed by a small kiss to the forehead.

You're all mine now, aren't you?

☆-☆-☆-☆-☆

You stir softly later in the evening when the moon is still high in the sky and the light of the stars shiens through the small crack in the curtains. A part in the back of your mind begins to worry as you're not in your own bed once again but you're

put at ease when you hear the distant voice of Checo in the distance. You Don even try and pay attention to his conversation, clearly in Spanish, and waltz right back into the open arms of slumber waiting to be woken again hopefully with your newfound lover by your side.

☆-☆-☆-☆-☆

Checo whispers in loud, harsh Spanish to the person on the other end of the phone.

"No, no me importan las consecuencias... Sí, lo entiendo... Pero ahora son míos, eso es lo único que importa... No, no escaparán, estoy seguro de que puedo mantenerlos aquí para siempre. .. Oh, encontraré una manera. No te preocupes."

No I don't care about the consequences... Yes I get that... But they're mine now that's all that matters... No they won't escape, I'm sure I can keep them here forever... Oh I'll find a way. Don't you worry.

-°•°•°•°•--•°•°•°•°--°•°•°•°•--•°•°•°•°-

Thank you for reading. I hope you enjoyed it!

As always, likes, reblogs and especially feedback is always welcome.

Taglist (irdk if this is anyone's thing so sorry if it's not). @nikfigueiredo @mysoulispainted @leclercings @d3kstar @hiireadstuff @a-beaverhausen @nichmeddar @lozzamez3 @stinkyjax @marymustdie @littlesatanicassholebitch @mehrmonga @insanedeathwish @ems-alexandra @a-disturbing-self-reflection @cherry-piee @minkyungseokie @checoverstappen @pasteljesse @deliciousfestsalad

[luimagines]

Could you pretty please do a four soulmate au? Feel free to be creative with the way to identify the soulmate or just the heterochromia au! Little mascots could be cute too, but feel free to do whatever!

...My weakness. Let's do this!

Masterlist

Content under the cut!

You knew you had a pretty lucky identifier.

Your two eyes were different colors. One was yours and the other was your soulmate.

You had noticed the initial age when you came of age. You had woken up one day and saw that your eyes was the prettiest shade of blue in existence. This made this so much easier! There were only so many people with blue eyes in your village. You could easily take a trip around and try to meet as many as you could and simply go down the list!

It's just the process of elimination at that point.

Sadly, you seemed to never find the time to do so. Every day there were chores to do and people to see and your parents never wanted you to go too far from the house since you were so young.

An interesting happened around the time you were eleven.

The shiny blue eyes that you had admired so much has muddled and within the hour was burst into a rainbow of colors. It couldn't seem to stay the one. When the light hit it a certain way, it looked green. From the side you could have sworn they looked purple. When you looked down you thought you could see the iris as red. When you looked at it head on though, it was still that same blue you came to love.

Naturally, your parents had caught on first that the changed had happened before you did. When it was only looked at in certain way, you would have had no idea that it was even happening.

You tried to not think too much about what it could have meant. Despite your parents freaking out about what might have happened to your soul for this to happen, you focused on the blue. The blue you were familiar with.

The strange effect had only lasted for a few months before the blue came back... but it was never the same as you once knew it to be. It had dulled. It could have passed for brown after everything. It was still pretty but the change was disappointing.

Years went by and you learned to live with it. Eventually the memory of such a clear blue vanish slightly and you began to appreciate the color for what it was now.

One day you were walking home from a long day in the woods. You were gathering materials for a project you had started up the week before. It was a little more slow going that you would have liked but you were happy with your progress.

A loud roar came from the right and you found yourself flung from the trail into a nearby tree. Your materials went flying everywhere. Your basket was destroyed.

You looked up in time to see the club raised and screamed, not even bothering to get a clear view of the monster.

You were never hit.

You heard a male grunt and the sound of flesh being cut as the monster screech in rage. You tried to crawl away and ended up slipping down the side of the hill, landing next to the dribbling creek.

You groaned and looked at your reflection.

You eyes were normal.

Suddenly, it felt like the pain wasn't there anymore as you tried to get to your feet as fast as you could. Battle raged around you, the cry of the first monster calling in more as reinforcements.

Someone dropped to your side, helping you up. "Are you ok?"

You looked at him and gulped. He had the same blue you used to admire day to day. "Ye-yeah... I'm.. I'm ok."

He didn't seem to notice, quickly nodding in your direction and turning around with a sword raised. "Good. Sorry about this. This will only take a moment."

The other monsters broke the tree line and b-lined for you both. He raised his sword to the sky, blinding you with a bright light before there were suddenly four of them running at the barrage of monsters before you.

You gasp.

Green.

Blue.

Purple.

Red.

You recognized their colors quickly and watched as they demolished the monster forces as if they were nothing.

The boys came together and reformed into the one guy once more. He grinned and put his sword away, walking up to you with a sheepish expression. "Sorry about the suddenly commotion. You got caught up in the wrong time. My name is Link by the way."

He sticks out his hand and waits for you to respond. Slowly, a unbridled grin covered your face. You reach to shake his hand as well as you introduce yourself by name. "And I'm your soulmate."

[loupy-mongoose]

Warning: This part contains topics of death and grief.

In-universe it is early November.

~~~~~~

Randy shivered against a sharp, cold breeze. He propped up his turtleneck.

Ready to go inside? Mr. Fuji's brow raised in questioning.

Randy nodded. Yeah.

The two men had been taking pleasant walk and chatting, Randy getting to know some of the residents of Mr. Fuji's care. He found the Alolan Rattata particularly fascinating--It was the first time he could really stop and notice how different a Dark type felt from other types. It was a bizarre effect. Almost like there was a mist of... nothingness, keeping him from feeling it's mind.

But now the wind was starting to pick up, and his sweater wasn't quite pulling its weight. He was beginning to find himself missing the relative warmth of Paldea.

As they approached Mr. Fuji's house, a small tune suddenly began playing, causing Fuji to turn, startled, toward Randy. After a moment, Randy realized what it was and pulled his phone from his pocket.

...I need to take this.

...

He sighed, and answered the call. Now by himself outside, he gave a nervous smile to the recipient who couldn't see him. Hey.

The voice on the other end was as warm, loving, and soothing as ever, but still filled Randy with the dread of knowing what was coming.

Hey. I got your message. Is now a good time?

The man's eyebrows lowered anxiously. Straight to the point, huh, Mom...

You said it was important.

Yeah.... I did...

I'm just... Not too excited to say it...

Viviana's voice took on a new alertness. What? Are you okay??

Randy fidgeted with his unoccupied hand, winding some hair around his fingers. I'm fine now...

But...

He sighed again.

This was it.

Mom...

I....

I had a heart attack.

He heard a sharp draw of breath over the phone.

He knew this wasn't something his mother would like to hear, but she had to know.

He went on.

A bad one.

My...

My heart stopped beating.

His mom stayed silent.

It was an... unusually stressful situation...

Akoya managed to resuscitate me, and I got the help I needed... I'm doing well now.

He listened for a response. But she said nothing.

...

Mom?

Mm!

Her voice broke, and she sounded as if a trance had been broken.

Sorry... I'm... processing...

Randy tugged at the neck of his sweater. Yeah.... I understand...

They both went quiet.

Oh, Randy...

Her voice was filled with emotion.

I wish I could give you a hug right now...

Yeah... He looked down at the grass blowing in the cold breeze, once more shivering. I do too... I'm sorry, I just thought it would be better for you to know sooner, rather than wait for our next visit.

Oh, no, no! I'm glad you told me! It's just a lot to take in. I'm sure it has been for you all, too.

...

How's Akoya?

Randy felt a pang for his wife.

He saw the lines that had appeared under her eyes.

He knew she had been having trouble sleeping since the event.

He noticed that she always matched her form to his.

He knew that she kept secret fears to herself.

Secret fears that it would happen again.

That she would need to sync their heartbeats again.

Randy...

He snapped his attention back to his mom.

Don't...

Don't forget...

What it's like to be on the other end...

A memory sprang into his minds eye, giving him a chill unlike what the weather could.

Okay?

His father.

Lying on the ground.

His mom over the lifeless form, fruitlessly struggling to revive him against all hope.

The sound of the operator on the other end of the phone, their words blurred out of his memory with age.

His own helpless panic.

Yeah...

Warm tears burned his eye.

I remember...

Mom...

I love you.

So much.

He heard her sniff and take a shaky breath.

I love you too, Son.

Come visit soon, okay?

Randy wiped his eyes.

Yeah.

Sounds good.

~~~~~~

I know this is a heavy topic, and I apologize if any part of it is misrepresentative. It's not a conversation type I've ever had to experience, but it's something I felt needed to be part of the story.

[ramblingthoughtsofayoungadult]

Unpredictable, Part 9-Limoreau x black!fem!reader fic

A/N: I'm finally updating! Thanks for your patience. Also, I didn't fully rewatch the episode so there will be some differences. Let me know if you wanted to be added to the taglist. Also, if you were on the taglist and aren't on it for this post, it just means when I typed your username, it didn't pop up. Enjoy!

Word count: 7.1k

Warnings: Swearing, sensuality, some angst, and general reader! insecurities about relationships

Series Masterlist

Taglist: @badbishsblog, @gardenof-venus, @morelovemorepeacemoretattoo-blog , @darksoul100, @simiinthemirror

The first thing I noticed when I woke up was the blood around my mouth. The coppery taste made my stomach lurch as I sat up and touched my mouth.

At least it was dried blood.

The second thing I noticed was the dejected expression on Cate’s face as she sat up on the couch across from me. She stared down at the ground, but she wasn’t looking at anything. For a second, I started to reach a hand towards her but stopped when I remembered what she’d done.

Just as I set my hand back in my lap, Marie and Jordan jerked awake, making me flinch in the process. It wasn’t until I settled a little that I noticed they were flanking me, and I looked down at my lap to hide my wide smile and warm cheeks.

“Is this real?” Marie asked.

“Yes, this is real,” Cate confirmed.

Immediately, Jordan jumped to his feet and shifted to their female form. They grinned so widely at the result that their dimples showed and Marie visibly relaxed next to me. Then, I noticed Marie glance at me.

Maybe if it worked for Jordan…

I took a deep breath and tried to focus on what else would unfold in the day. Instead of a picture, all I saw were hazy black and gray figures in my mind and it felt like my brain had hit a wall. I swallowed the lump in my throat and shook my head.

“Really?” Marie asked, placing her hand on top of mine.

“Don’t worry about it,” I muttered, slowly pulling my hand away.

“I’m sorry, Y/N, your powers should come back soon,” Cate voiced hoarsely.

 I thought I nodded as I slowly moved to my feet. “I’m gonna go clean myself up.”

“Do you need any help?” Jordan offered.

“No, I got it.”

 After a few minutes of wandering through Dusty’s house, I found a semi-clean bathroom and locked the door as soon as I walked in. The faucet handles were slippery, and it took a few tries before I finally got the water running. When I reached for the paper towel roll on top of the toilet, I realized that my hands were trembling.

“Stop it, Y/N, calm down,” I hissed. “There’s nothing to worry about.”

Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry ran through my head like a mantra as I patted my face with warm water.

“I do not need my powers to be myself,” I muttered. “I’m still me even if I can’t see potential future outcomes.”

Or help my friends or loved ones or pass any crim classes or get a job as a supe.

Then, I was thankful that the running water drowned out my sobs since I wasn’t sure how much of a noise blocker my hand was. I almost collapsed over the sink as my back shook with sobs and the hot tears ran down my face.

No matter how much I wanted to stop crying, I couldn’t. It was like all those years of holding it back made me incapable of doing it in the moment.

Why did this happen to me? Why do I have to get screwed over all the time? bitterly ran through my mind.

I never did anything to Cate to deserve this, nothing at all and she wiped me twice without thinking of the consequences. Wiping two days’ worth of memories from four people’s minds must have been a first for her. There was no telling what that could have done to her powers, and she still did it.

I don’t know why my brain decided that was the time to remember Cate’s playful smile when she talked me into sneaking off campus with the others or her sincerity when I processed my feelings about Jordan and Marie with her. My chest ached and it wasn’t like I had a chest cold----it was almost like I took a direct blow from Luke, but it ached worse than that.

None of Cate’s actions made sense at the moment. Shetty must have put in a lot of effort to manipulate her because she was my friend, almost like the big sister I never had. When I really thought about it, Cate was one of my most attentive friends. Whenever I was stressed or anxious, Cate would take me to her favorite campus green to meditate; when a creepy guy approached me at a party or club, Cate was one of the first people to intervene; and she always insisted that I joined her, Jordan, Andre, and Luke for study groups.

I had to know how she could go from that to rendering me powerless. As I finished cleaning the blood from around the left side of my mouth and nostril, a sinking feeling came over me.

If Shetty could do that to Cate then what had she done to me?

Knock! Knock!

The sound made me jump and shook me out of my stupor.

“One second!” I called, frantically wiping at the other side of my face.

As I stared at my reflection, I internally winced at my red, puffy eyes. It would take at least three rounds of Peter Thomas Roth under eye masks and endless eye drops to remedy them.

“I just wanted to check on you,” Marie’s voice softly called.

I almost froze and huffed.

“Oh, I’m fine.” I sniffled and wiped at my nose.

“I’ll believe you when you open the door.”

Did Marie have some sort of fixation with seeing me at my worst?

“Seriously, you can go back to the others,” I tried to insist.

“If you don’t, I will break down this door.”

“You wouldn’t do that.”

Marie paused. “Jordan would.”

I huffed and threw the used tissues and paper towel in the trash can. After taking three deep breaths to calm myself, I unlocked the door and let Marie in. She immediately entered the room, forcing me to back up. Slowly, her hands grabbed the sides of my face, and she looked me over, eyes softening at the bits of blood I hadn’t been able to clean.

Then, I carefully grabbed her hands and started pulling away. “You don’t have to get that close to see that I’m fine.”

“Oh, I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable,” Marie apologized, then, she frowned. “Actually, no. After everything you said, you pushed me and Jordan away and ran as soon as we woke up; it’s confusing.”

I sighed and turned away from her as I grabbed more paper towel. “I’m sorry. After everything that happened when we were in Cate’s head, I didn’t want you or Jordan to see me like this…again.”

As soon as I turned towards the sink, Marie stepped in front of me and gently took the paper towel out of my hands. She gestured towards the toilet, and I sat on the seat as she wet the paper towel in the sink. After a few seconds, she turned off the faucet and leaned down in front of me.

Marie’s gaze was laser-focused as she cleaned up the rest of my face. The silence in the space was comfortable but I couldn’t stop fidgeting with my braids as she worked.

“When are you gonna understand that Jordan and I don’t care if you don’t look perfect all the time?” she finally uttered. “They just told you how we’re all messy in our own way and it’s okay that you’re a part of it.”

“I didn’t think I had any more tears left in me but I guess I was wrong,” I muttered with a shrug.

Marie hummed in response as she continued gently wiping my face. A few more seconds passed until she was finally done.

“Finding you and Cate scared the shit out of me,” she stated. “It felt like the ground fell out from under me and I had no idea what to do. Jordan had the idea of slowing down your heart rates and it worked but, I’m scared to think what would happen if it didn’t.”

“But it did work because you have amazing powers.” I grabbed her hands. “You saved me, and Cate and I know you’ll save more.” Then, I let go of her hands. “Well, not know-know.”

“Hey, you’ll get your powers back. We’ll figure something out,” Marie insisted. “But what if we don’t” hung on the tip of my tongue and I didn’t let it fall out. Instead, I watched Marie throw away the dirty paper towel and then she grabbed my hands.

“It’s okay to let us help you,” she said.

“But, you’ll get tired---”

“I won’t and I know Jordan won’t either. People take care of each other in relationships.”

I looked down at our clasped hands. “That’s all…new for me.”

Marie squeezed my hands. “Me too but, I know the basics.”

Having a loving family must have been nice; at least Marie had a normal baseline for how to be in a relationship. Then, I realized that she kept looking at me.

“What? Is there something else on my face? Did my eyes get worse?” I rambled.

Marie laughed. “No, your face is fine; pretty.”

My cheeks warmed at her words, and I couldn’t keep the grin off my lips. Then, I felt myself lean towards Marie and she quickly closed the gap. Her lips were slightly chapped but mostly soft against mine. As I pressed my lips against hers, I let go of Marie’s hands and tangled my hands in her twists. Marie’s hands ghosted up my hips and underneath my cardigan, pulling me closer to her.

I sighed at the feeling but didn’t stop kissing her. Somehow, Marie didn’t break the kiss as she stood, pulling me to my feet and running her hands up and down my back.

I could have stayed like that for a while but a scream followed by banging interrupted.

“SAM!” Emma yelled.

We broke apart and I grabbed Marie’s hand and tugged her out of the bathroom with me. When we got to the living room, it was a mess. On one end of the room, Jordan and Andre were picking themselves off the floor and trying to avoid all the broken glass and other furniture casualties. On the other end, Sam held a weak Cate up against a wall that already had a sizable hole in it. Based on the dust on Cate’s clothes, Sam had attacked her. Emma stood behind Sam, eyes wide but her voice calm. “Sam, it’s okay, you can let her go.”

“She hurt you---she made you forget,” Sam griped.

“But I’m okay now, everyone is okay now. You can let her go, she’s not going to hurt anyone else.”

It was hard to gauge how much I agreed with the last part of Emma’s statement, but I doubted Cate would go after one of us again soon. Slowly, Sam let her go and Cate collapsed on the ground, gasping. Marie hurried over to Cate’s side to help her up and Sam backed away from them, eyes still boring holes in the top of Cate’s head.

My eyes flitted to Emma, who seemed a little more relieved, and ran a hand through her messy hair.

“Why is your hair that messy?” I asked.

“What is it with people asking me that today? Why is your lip gloss smudged?”

Then, Jordan turned to me and raised an eyebrow. “Great timing, freshie.”

I thumbed at my lips and my cheeks warmed even more. “Get your head out of the gutter. Anyway, what brought you two back here?”

Emma straightened up. “We were looking for you guys because I wanted, well, actually, Sam has something he would like to say.”

Then, Emma gave Sam the same look her mom gave her when she needed her to improve on a take. Suddenly, Sam’s shoulders slumped, and he pouted as he gazed at the tips of his dirty sneakers.

“I’m sorry for almost killing you guys…twice. I’m working on getting better control of my emotions but being locked up for eighteen years really screws with your head,” Sam stated.

The silence that followed was almost unbearable. Cate’s eyes never left Sam as if she was waiting on him to pounce again; Marie frowned; Andre’s jaw clenched so hard that I wasn’t sure he would speak for a while; and Jordan cocked her head to the side.

Finally, Andre said, “You didn’t almost kill us.”

“Fifteen more seconds and he might have,” Jordan admitted.

“My head is still sore from the last time we met but I’m willing to move forward if you stop attacking us on sight,” I added.

“I’m really sorry about that. You’re Y/N, right? Emma talks about you all the time,” Sam commented.

I grinned. “Oh, really?”

Sam nodded. “Yeah, she was saying that you’re great but clueless about relationships and----”

Emma patted Sam’s chest. “Okay, Sam, that’s enough. We don’t have time to talk about that because of the other thing.”

I narrowed my eyes at Emma. “Clueless, seriously?”

She smiled sheepishly and I sighed.

Unfortunately, Emma wasn’t fully wrong, but she didn’t have to tell Sam that. Besides, I was working on it.

For the next few minutes, the two filled us in on everything that was going on in the Woods. How Shetty had Dr. Cardoza experimenting on supes and how several people Sam knew down there got sick. Even though most of them got better, a couple died.

“And they never experimented on you?” Andre asked.

“Not the way they did with Tommy. He was super messed up but a funny guy. One day, they took him away for a session with Cardoza and I never saw him again,” Sam recalled.

“And Shetty knows about all of this and is doing nothing to stop it?” Marie confirmed.

“She hates supes; she wants us all dead,” Sam griped.

Cate shook her head. “That…that can’t be true. Indira always helped me and Y/N.”

Jordan glared at her. “Come on, Cate. Shetty manipulated the shit out of you because she knew we were getting too close.”

“And I want to know why she wanted the two of us to be so close,” I added.

Cate bit her bottom lip and played with the hem of her sweater. “This…this is a lot.”

I nodded. “But it sounds like they’re working on a virus that targets supes. Based on what Sam described, maybe they picked strong supes that weren’t as useful as Sam to be guinea pigs.” “So, they come up with a virus to kill all of us?” Andre asked.

“I don’t know if that’s the goal, though. Vought has invested way too much money in making supes and if all the GOD U students dropped dead, that’s the next lineup of the Seven gone,” Jordan interjected.

“And society is built around supes, and the fallout would be bad,” Marie said.

“But if Shetty hates us so much, she wouldn’t care,” I thought.

“How is she getting away with this when Vought watches everything? She has to report to them all the time,” Jordan wondered.

Since Brink died, Shetty had to have even more people working under her than before. It would be easy to have certain people cover up for her or maybe the woman was gifted at hiding heinous plots. Seeing how much effort she put into manipulating Cate, there was no telling how far Shetty was willing to go to hide the Woods.

“Shetty could lie on the reports; it’s not like Vought reads through everything carefully,” I pointed out.

“So, what do we do?” Emma asked.

At the moment, I wished that I had my powers. It would have made it much easier to come up with a plan. Instead, I didn’t try but racked my brain for ideas.

“I can help here,” Cate announced.

Everyone turned to her in unison, and no one looked confident. In all honesty, Sam seemed to be contemplating going after her again; Emma looked as though she wished Cate would stop talking; Andre somehow clenched his jaw more; Marie side-eyed her; and Jordan’s glare almost made me feel bad too. I tried to relax my shoulders and forced myself to listen.

“I know that no one trusts me right now but, I am the only one with a direct line to Indira,” Cate said. “Please, just let me try.”

“How do we know you won’t turn on us again?” Andre asked.

“I won’t, I promise,” Cate insisted.

“Yeah, well, your promises don’t mean shit to me right now,” Andre hissed.

“I agree with Andre; after this, anything’s possible,” Emma said.

Cate hesitated and turned to me. “Y/N, please, you know me. I may have messed up but I wouldn’t do it twice.”

A part of me wanted to believe her, really, but the other part was the giant gaping wound of being manipulated so badly that I had no powers. My stomach sunk when I looked at her and I suddenly felt nauseous.

I hugged my arms tightly around my waist. “I don’t know, Cate. I want to trust you again, but it’s difficult.”

Cate’s expression fell and I didn’t know if I wanted to comfort her or scream at her. Everything was so confusing and it didn’t help that I had this gnawing feeling that something else was going on; something that none of us knew.

Marie stepped forward to stand next to Cate. “I think this could be a good first step for you to start earning our trust, but I don’t blame Y/N for feeling how she feels.”

“Same here,” Jordan agreed.

I smiled at their words and had to fight to keep myself from crying even more.  

After some deliberation, we decided that Cate, Andre, Marie, Jordan, and I would focus on getting Shetty to expose her plot while Emma helped Sam hide from Vought or Shetty or whoever he’d upset.

That decision led me to leaning against the wall in a booth at an off-campus diner. It was fairly quiet, save for the handful of families laughing with their kids and the game that was on the outdated TV perched on a corner stand. Even though there was a giant plate of fries and greasy burgers on the table, barely anyone ate. I couldn’t stop staring at Cate, who was on her phone in the front corner of the restaurant.

“Can anyone hear anything?” Andre asked.

“No,” Marie said.

“And she’s not even facing us so we can’t even try lip reading,” I muttered.

Marie turned to me. “You know how to lip read?”

“Yeah, every crim major does. It’s part of the body language class,” I explained.

Marie nodded slowly. “This school is nuts.”

“We know,” Jordan muttered.

Finally, Cate hung up the phone and wandered back over to us. “I can’t see her yet; she’s in the city all morning.”

“What does that mean?” Jordan asked.

“I’ll have to wait at her house and get her to talk then,” Cate said.

Andre shook his head. “That’s too much time.”

“Did she sound different or suspicious of you?” Marie asked.

“No, she sounded fine. I’m sorry this isn’t turning out how we hoped.”

Based on her slumped shoulders, I guessed that Cate was telling the truth. The situation was both irritating and relieving since my list of questions for Shetty grew every minute and I was itching to ask them, but I was also thankful for a chance to gather my bearings. The thought of confronting her made me fidget since Shetty had helped me a lot.

How could someone be so kind and so hateful at the same time?

“…and stay out of our heads!”

Jordan’s exclamation jerked me from my thoughts, and I watched them shift to their male form and storm out of the diner. Andre ran his hand over his face and started messing with a straw while Cate looked down at her gloved hands.

“I’ll be back,” Marie muttered, slipping out of the booth and trailing after Jordan.

I blinked and turned back to Cate and Andre. “Sorry, what did I miss?”

“Jordan’s pissed because we have to wait at Shetty’s to get any info out of her and we’re on a timer pretty much,” Andre explained.

“This is all my fault,” Cate muttered.

Instead of answering, I dumped a handful of fries on my plate and started using them to make patterns in the ketchup between bites. When I bit into a burger, I almost moaned at the taste.

Either I was ravenous, or this place had decent food.

When I glanced back up, Cate and Andre stared at me.

I swallowed. “I got hungry.”

“You’re not gonna go after your…partners?” Andre asked.

I straightened up and continued munching on a fry. “We never labeled ourselves as anything and Marie’s got it.”

“Well, I’m glad the three of you have figured something out,” Cate offered.

“Thanks, but, I don’t know how much we have figured out.”

With everything going on, I never paused to think about how this relationship would work. In all honesty, I was shocked that I was able to tell Jordan and Marie how I felt and even more when both reciprocated. But I wondered what happened from here. How did we figure that out?

“It takes time,” Cate answered.

I snapped my eyes up to her. “Could you not probe my mind for a second?”

“Sorry, I can’t help it right now.”

Just as I was going to take another bite, my phone buzzed in my lap.

M: Come outside.

I quickly typed back, Omw.

“If I’m not back soon, just get a box for me.”

“Got you,” Andre said.

When I got outside, the chill made me wrap my cardigan tighter around me. Fortunately, Jordan and Marie were just around the corner and it was a short walk. Just as I got around the corner, the two were kissing. It only lasted a few seconds until Jordan pulled away, a smirk on his face, and I imagined Marie had a similar expression.

“What was that about my bad timing?” I called.

Marie turned at the sound of my voice and Jordan’s smirk deepened.

“Don’t be jealous,” he sang.

Funnily enough, I wasn’t jealous the first time I caught them; just shocked and confused. This time, watching them made me smile all over.

I rolled my eyes at Jordan’s words and sauntered over to them. “Please tell me you didn’t make Marie summon me in an attempt to make me jealous.”

“He didn’t make me do anything, but I thought you should be a part of this conversation,” Marie explained.

Then, Marie launched into hers and Jordan’s idea to break into Shetty’s office, find damning evidence of the Woods and the virus, and bring it to Victoria Neuman. The more she talked, the more the uneasiness set in.

“That town hall is happening today so it’s perfect timing,” Marie concluded.

Jordan looked at me expectantly and I glanced at the giant blue and red poster of the political candidate on the side of the building. Politicians had this strange fixation on looking hopeful, trustworthy, and powerful in all their photos. According to Coco, it was one of the most challenging parts of the field. No matter what any politician did, it all seemed fake to me. Maybe it was because I could see what they would really do if they were elected.

Even though I couldn’t use my powers, something about Victoria Neuman seemed off to me.

“Say it, freshie,” Jordan encouraged gently.

“In theory, I think it’s a good idea to get this information to someone with massive influence,” I started.

“But,” Marie said.

“But I have a weird feeling about her, actually, I’ve been having a weird feeling all day now,” I admitted.

“This is our best shot to expose Shetty right now,” Marie argued.

I nodded. “And I’m not saying not to take it. I’m saying I’m not sure how it’ll play out.”

“Is this about your powers?” Jordan asked.

“No, sort of, anyway, like I said, if you want to go rogue, do it.”

“You’d be coming with us too.” Marie reached a hand towards me, and I unfolded my arms to let her play with my fingers.

I sighed. “But I don’t know how helpful I’ll be.”

“This is gonna sound cheesy as hell, but you don’t need your powers to be helpful. You figured out that Cate manipulated you twice and you figured out that their goal in the Woods is to create a virus against supes. And you did all that without your powers,” Jordan pointed out.

“You’re amazing, Y/N,” Marie added.

I smiled and flipped my braids over my shoulder. “If you say so.”

Marie shook her head and Jordan grabbed my other hand.

“So, this may not be the best time to ask but are we…”

“You’re my girlfriend,” Jordan answered.

“Our girlfriend,” Marie corrected.

“She asked me out first.”

“No, I didn’t. I told you I liked you first,” I argued.

Jordan shrugged. “Same thing.”

Marie swatted Jordan’s arm with her free hand. “This relationship isn’t a competition.”

“Said the sore loser.”

Just as they were about to start bickering, my phone buzzed in my pocket. I let go of Jordan’s hand to grab it, ignored his feigned insulted gasp, and swiped through it. Sydney had texted Sasha, Alina, Lydia, and me in our group text.

S:911. Meeting in an hour.

“As much as I would love to continue this, I have to go to Si Chi,” I said, slipping my phone back in my pocket.

“Really? Now?” Jordan asked.

“Emergency meeting and I need time to get ready. I’ll text you both later.”

When I moved to hug Marie, she pecked my lips instead and I flinched. She smiled mischievously and I blinked at her.

“And I thought you were this shy, sweet freshman,” I muttered.

“I learn quickly,” she teased.

I shook my head and turned to Jordan, who immediately pressed his lips against mine, hands roaming all over my back. I was in a daze as he moaned but when one of his hands squeezed my butt, I yelped and jumped away.

“Jordan!” I rasped.

Even though Jordan apologized, he did not look sorry at all. As I sauntered off to get an Uber, I couldn’t help but wonder what I had gotten myself into but couldn’t deny the buzz of excitement at the thought.

Exactly fifty-five minutes later, I sat in the large conference room in Si Chi, freshly showered and made up. The cherry red Ralph Lauren tennis mini dress and white Chanel platforms paired with my braids swept up in a messy bun made me feel exposed but pretty. A minute later, Alina and Lydia waltzed in together. Alina’s hair was in a low bun with pieces framing her face and her black long-sleeved Naked Wardrobe skirt set flowed around her with each step. Lydia wore a deep plum Givenchy blazer over a white Oxford and dark Levi’s, her deep auburn hair fell around her shoulders in soft curls.

Immediately, Lydia took a seat across from me while Alina took a seat on my right.

“Hi, Lydia, Alina,” I greeted.

“Hi, Y/N,” Lydia chirped.

“Hi,” Alina said.

 As soon as they sat, Sydney breezed in, her knit white DKNY dress catching the light as well as her diamond studs. She pushed a wavy strawberry blonde tendril out of her face as she took a seat at the head of the table and set her canvas Marc Jacobs tote on the glossy table.

“Hello, girls,” Sydney said.

“Hello, Sydney.”

Our unified voices sent a chill down my spine.

Finally, Sasha burst in, sweat coating her forehead as she quickly took the seat next to Lydia and adjusted her deep green wrap dress. “Sorry, there was a big crowd because of the rally.”

“It’s okay, Sasha. Just remember to factor in big events when you’re commuting for other meetings,” Sydney advised evenly.

Sasha seemed to gulp and nodded.

“That leads me to the topic of this emergency meeting. I know that the town hall on campus is going to be packed and it’s been a hot topic for weeks since it was announced. This morning, all the Greek presidents met and determined that each house will decide their own policy for attendance,” Sydney explained. “I’ve debated this for a while. Our high standards and reputation attract ambitious women and plenty of them will want to attend the town hall. However, I am also concerned about the safety of this event since there is so much opposition on both sides.”

Sydney paused.

“That is why I believe that no Si Chi girl should attend the event,” Sydney stated.

Even though she worded it softly, Sydney was forbidding all of us from attending. If anyone was caught, that would mean an automatic exit from the house.

“It’s especially important for us as leadership to be role models for the initiates. We must choose our events wisely and we don’t want any of them risking anything because of their ideologies or to try to go viral,” Sydney explained.

“It makes sense. Those pro-supes are rowdy,” Lydia agreed.

And ignorant, I thought.

“I’m all for supe rights but I don’t want to be caught in a riot,” Alina added.

“How do we communicate this to the other girls?” Sasha asked.

“Y/N can send something out in the house Discord.” Sydney smiled at me. “You know how to make it tasteful but authoritative.”

As much as I appreciated the compliment, I couldn’t stop thinking of how to persuade her. If I had my powers, this would be nothing but the only thing I had was my wits. The more I thought, the more I was concerned that my wits abandoned me.

“Well, that’s it unless anyone has something to add?” Sydney prompted.

Finally, I had something.

“Yes. I agree that everyone’s safety is important, but I don’t think we’ve thought about the political science majors. Their professors will be all over this and more and more of them want first-hand footage. I think discouraging everyone will put them at a real disadvantage,” I said.

My heart pounded in my ears as I watched the gears turn in Sydney’s head. It wasn’t my best work but it might have made a difference.

“It’s a shame but, they’ll have to figure something else out,” Sydney said.

“Well---”

“Have that done in thirty, okay?”

Sydney’s words were light but her eyes were so intense that my words stopped in my head. I nodded and she dismissed everyone. Sasha grinned widely at me as she stood and walked out.

“I guess your friend will have to figure something else out. With it being junior year and all, it’s even more important that she doesn’t fail anything,” Sasha said.

“Her name is Coco and even though this is an inconvenience she’ll figure something out.”

As confident as I was in Coco, I had no idea what I was going to do. Surprisingly, writing up the Discord message was easy, even though plenty of the girls were upset, it was a simple fix of, “If you’re disappointed, Sydney is more than happy to answer your questions.” However, I wasn’t sure how I was going to tell Jordan and Marie that I couldn’t help them get the information to Neuman.

Of course, the time we set to meet up outside of Shetty’s office arrived too soon and I found myself pacing down the hall, filled with dread the closer I got to Shetty’s office. When I arrived, the door was already open and my heart lurched into my throat.

Oh no, we’ve been caught, this won’t work, I panicked.

Then, I forced myself to take a deep breath and crept closer to the door. It took five more deep breaths for me to get the courage to peek around the corner. At first glance, Shetty’s office looked like it normally did: peaceful but professional. Her space was light and airy with the perfect amount of light from the sun seeping through the windows. However, when I looked closer, there were papers sprawled over her desk, something that she would never stand for.

Just as I started to creep in, Jordan popped up from behind the desk and cursed loudly when she saw me.

“You could have said something, freshie!” Jordan admonished, one hand pressed to her chest and another holding a file.

“Well, I didn’t know who was in here!” I defended, wandering further in. “You should have closed the doors behind you.”

Jordan smirked. “You say that like I’m not the one who taught you how to sneak into places. I would have just told whoever that Shetty needed me to find something.”

“Technically, you all contributed to teaching me that but okay.”

Then, I turned back towards the doors to start closing them when Marie slipped in. We nearly collided but I took a half step back.

“Shit, sorry!” Marie exclaimed.

“It’s fine, I guess it’s my karma.”

I let her slip past me and made sure the doors were secured behind us before joining her and Jordan at Shetty’s desk.

“Have you found anything yet?” Marie asked.

“No, just different files on different kids.”

I perked up. “Like the ones she checks in with?”

“I think so. I didn’t read any because that felt wrong.” Jordan paused. “And don’t go looking for your file; you need to be focused.”

“Fine,” I groaned playfully.

We decided it would be best for Jordan and me to go through Shetty’s physical files while Marie searched her computer. As I skimmed the documents, my brain circled around how I would tell them that I couldn’t go to the town hall. There was no great way to say, “Hey, I can’t help you expose a major conspiracy because my house president said ‘no’ and if I disobey, I’ll be ostracized.” I would find better words but that’s what it all boiled down to.

If only Si Chi and rankings didn’t matter so much.

Then, I paused at a newspaper clipping I found. It was from that plane crash a couple of years back, the one that Queen Maeve and Homelander failed to save. The thought of all those people dying made my stomach churn. As I kept reading, my stomach settled a little and I felt myself buzzing.

“Look.” I set the file down on Shetty’s desk and Jordan stepped closer and Marie swiveled in her chair.

“It’s from that plane crash,” Marie observed.

“Why would Shetty have a file on this?” Jordan asked.

“Because of this.” I flipped through the documents and pointed out the passenger list. “It’s right in the middle.”

After a few seconds of reading, both their eyes widened.

“Holy shit,” Jordan breathed.

“Her kid and her husband were on that plane; that’s why she hates all supes, it makes total sense,” Marie said.

“It’s only motive but, it might be useful for Neuman. But no one’s found anything on the Woods?” I asked.

Marie and Jordan shook their heads.

“Great, this couldn’t get worse,” Marie muttered.

Immediately, Shetty’s office door handle started jiggling and our eyes snapped to it.

“I thought you locked the door,” Jordan hissed.

“No, it would have been suspicious if the door was locked,” I whispered back.

“We don’t have time for this. Hide whatever you can.”

Frantically, we shoved the unimportant files in random drawers, and I kept the one about the plane crash under my denim jacket. Just when the door pushed open, someone dragged me down and I found myself sandwiched between Jordan and Marie underneath Shetty’s desk. It was a tight squeeze, and I didn’t think that I could move if I tried but, I was more focused on keeping my breathing even as someone entered the office.

“Nice digs. I guess this is what you get for screwing over everyone,” a masculine voice drawled.

“That’s Cardoza,” Jordan mouthed.

My eyes widened and I could feel my heart rate pick up. For a few seconds, I couldn’t focus on any of my surroundings, and I couldn’t hear anything either. This shouldn’t have been happening, I took my medicine, I knew I did.

Just breathe, Y/N, and use your exercise.

I see three of Jordan’s rings, I smell Marie’s hair oil, I feel really warm, and----

My thoughts were cut off by Marie grabbing my shoulders and muttering, “It’s okay.”

In the next few seconds, my heart rate slowed down, and I breathed a lot easier. I would have turned to thank her if it would have blown our cover.

For the next minute, Dr. Cardoza ranted about how his medical prowess was misused and how no one was supposed to get hurt.

“It was all for science! But screw science and me, right?” he bellowed.

Then, he got quiet for a second, but it was quickly filled by the sound of something trickling. Since she was in the most convenient position, Jordan poked her head out from her hiding spot only to immediately retract it and shake her head.

I hated where my imagination went.

Finally, the sound stopped, and the man groaned. “Here’s your precious data.”

Something plopped onto the desk, and we all perked up. As soon as the door slammed behind him, we rushed out from our hiding spot. Marie grabbed the USB that Dr. Cardoza dropped and plugged it into the computer. In seconds, we had everything that could expose Dean Shetty and the Woods. Some of the details made me wretch and some things did not need visuals but had them.

It was perfect ammunition.

“Wow,” Marie said.

“How long were they doing all this?” Jordan muttered.

I shook my head, grabbed the file from my jacket, and took pictures of the important parts. “I don’t know if I want to know at this point.”

After Marie grabbed the USB and we put everything else back to normal, we got out of that office as quickly as we could. While we walked down the hallway, my thumbs flew across my phone screen.

“I just sent the pictures to you both,” I said.

“Why? Are you afraid you’ll accidentally delete it?” Marie asked.

Okay, here it goes.

“I can’t go to the town hall,” I confessed.

“Are you scared? No one’s going to do anything, they’re all talk,” Jordan said. “And I wouldn’t let them touch you.”

“Neither would I,” Marie affirmed.

“I appreciate that but, it’s not out of fear. Si Chi girls can’t attend; president’s orders.”

They stopped walking at the same time, and I lagged a little, dreading facing them. At first, they both looked stunned then Jordan looked like she would strangle someone, and Marie was confused.

“That’s bullshit,” Jordan hissed.

“Yeah, they can’t tell you where you can and can’t go,” Marie agreed.

I shifted my weight from foot to foot. “Well, they sort of can. If I go, it’s immediate expulsion from the sorority.”

“But this is important. They have to make an exception,” Marie offered.

“I couldn’t tell them about this. Sydney would get an ulcer at the thought of breaking into the dean’s office and going through private files,” I argued. “Plus, if I told them about any of this, they’d think I’m a crazy conspiracy theorist.”

“This isn’t a conspiracy or a theory; they did this shit and no one did anything about it,” Jordan insisted.

I huffed. “I know that, Jordan, but I also know these girls and they don’t like to leave their comfort zones. Even though Sydney is one of the more progressive presidents, she still has to maintain the standards.”

“Even if it includes covering up Shetty’s plan to make everyone sick?”

I hesitated. “I…I’m not sure.”

Marie groaned. “Come on, Y/N, you don’t have to do every little thing they say. You’re high up in the house, doesn’t that mean anything?”

“Yes, it means more status and respect but also more eyes, so I’m almost double forbidden from going.” I sighed. “I’m sorry but, this is as far as I can go. Text or video call me if you need anything.”

The moment I turned on my heel and started walking away, I understood what a kicked puppy must feel like. I only made it a few steps before both grabbed one of my wrists.  

“Stop running,” Jordan said.

“I’m not running,” I argued.

“Bullshit, this whole thing is,” she challenged.

I paused and narrowed my eyes at Jordan. “It might be to you but it’s very important to me. It always has been.”

When I pulled at her hand, Jordan let me go and I turned to Marie, but her expression hardened.

“You don’t have to do this,” she insisted.

I scoffed. “Yes, I do. Vought already gave you their stamp of approval, so you’re set. I have to play it smart, and I can’t do anything to lose Si Chi right now.”

“That’s not fair, Y/N,” Marie said.

“It’s the truth, though. I’m on thin ice with not being able to use my powers and I can’t mess up anything else!”

Jordan stepped closer to me. “The Woods is bigger than anything at this school. Screw rankings, Si Chi, and GOD U. Shetty wants us all dead and you have a chance to stop her. You have a chance to be a hero.”

They were right, this was a fantastic opportunity to help people and make GOD U a better place. We had no idea how many kids were still trapped down there or what they were experiencing. This plot needed to be exposed and everyone needed to be held accountable. At any other time, I would have jumped at the chance to help but I couldn’t.

If only Sydney hadn’t given that order.

I wanted the ground to swallow me up and take me somewhere far away from the two pairs of deep brown eyes that bored into me. I also wanted Marie and Jordan to stop looking at me with such intensity; it just made everything harder.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered.

“You’re not the only one risking your ranking here, you know. I don’t get why you insist on doing all this shit after everything,” Jordan spat.

I flinched at her tone and swallowed thickly. I knew she was referring to my family and how awful they were. The worst part was I didn’t know why I was like this either.

How could I have made so much progress just to end up back where I was?

Just a few hours ago, I was giggly about having a new girlfriend and partner. Before my meeting at Si Chi, I even made spreadsheets of some dates we could have and gift ideas for holidays and birthdays.

Seeing them both look at me with such hurt in their eyes almost broke me and I wanted to forget about the smug expression on Sasha’s face and Sydney’s tone. But, I just couldn’t.  

[somepsychopomp]

Winter's Night

AKA frosty old man yaoi

I've been thinking a LOT about the newest Fionna and Cake episodes... i'm not sorry

AU where the Candy Queen never shows up and the F&C gang hang out in the winter kingdom for a while longer.

Excerpt:

He didn't know why, but Simon approached his double as he played away on the piano. Then again, in the Winter King's world, wasn't he the double?

"Yes?" the King asked, not even turning around. Simon paused, his bare feet seemingly stuck upon the frozen floor.

"I..." Simon came to the terrible realization that he didn't know what to say. Or why he'd even come here, following the other Simon's music, "I couldn't sleep."

+++

It'd been a day since they arrived in the Winter King's world. Or two now, given that it was the very early hours of a new day. The sky outside the vast halls of the castle were dark and misty, the moon tucked away in a blanket of pale clouds.

Simon let his fingertips glide over the chilly windows, the pads of his fingers catching on not even the slightest bump or rough patch of ice. Everything in the castle, everything in the entire kingdom, was so perfect.

And this left him restless. More so than the strange scarab man that'd been following them, who was still thankfully trapped in a chunk of ice. If the Winter King's estimates were correct, the duplicate crown would be completed within just seven days of the process beginning. And then Simon would be pulled back into a dizzying, eternal labyrinth of madness.

Not eternal, he reminded himself. He promised to show you how to tame it.

To tame the crown. Simon had tried so many times to do just that only to fail in his own world. Even with the proof right before his eyes, he didn't know how in God's name he was ever going to become like the other Simon.

Which was why he was here, being chased through the silent halls by his thoughts. Somewhere in the haze of memories that belonged to the Ice King, Simon remembered being restless. With all that magic, the Ice King was far more energetic than he ever was. And maybe it'd rubbed off on him.

As he turned a corner, Simon paused at what he thought was the sound of wind. Or maybe not wind, but a whistle? No, wrong again.

it was the high notes of a piano coming from far away.

Finding himself no longer entrenched in his thoughts, Simon made his way toward the sound, unsurprised to find his doppelgänger tapping away at a cerulean piano.

The Winter King was out of the suit he wore during the day, instead dressed in loose robes in brilliant hues of pale white and sapphire. Seems like Simon wasn’t the only one who couldn’t sleep.

He lingered in the entryway to the throne room. The other had his back to Simon, playing a soft but cheerful tune. He didn't yet know he had an audience and was instead playing a concert for himself. Exhaling, Simon closed his eyes and searched for anything familiar in the Winter King's music: a scrap from one of the songs he and Marceline used to make up when she was little, the melody to the Cheers opening, those old Broadway tunes Betty used to hum while she read.

Nothing. He opened his eyes.

He didn't know why, but Simon approached his double as he played away on the piano. Then again, in the Winter King's world, wasn't he the double?

"Yes?" the King asked, not even turning around. Simon paused, his bare feet seemingly stuck upon the frozen floor. 

"I..." Simon came to the terrible realization that he didn't know what to say. Or why he'd even come here, following the other Simon's music, "I couldn't sleep."

Before he could apologize and leave, WK, as Fionna had taken to calling him, turned and smiled over his shoulder. He sat to one side of the piano bench, a clear invitation. Feeling as if he couldn't excuse himself at this point, Simon took the offer and sat beside him.

"Oh, dear," the Winter King said, looking down, "Your poor feet!"

"Huh?" Simon followed his gaze. Yes, his feet were looking a bit discolored. They'd taken on an ashen hue and as he flexed his toes, Simon was a bit surprised to find them quite numb.

"What happened to your complimentary slippers?" Winter King asked. He clapped his hands and those two girls, the Ice Scouts, came out of nowhere with a fresh set of plush, white slippers. Simon could hardly utter thanks before they jet off to leave them alone.

Nevertheless, he slipped them on. He, along with the others, had been given very large guest rooms in the castle well stocked with warm, winter clothes. But when Simon climbed out of bed, sick with his thoughts, he'd taken a white robe and nothing more.

He fought the urge to laugh at himself. "Truth be told, I sometimes forget that the cold can hurt me."

He spoke as if this were still a recent development. But the last ten or so years as Simon were nothing compared to the thousand spent as Ice King.

A hand fell upon his shoulder. The other Simon at least didn't stare at him with pity. Just that sort of self-assured confidence that was, admittedly, entirely earned. 

“Well, not to fret! Soon you won’t have to worry a thing about the cold.”

The Winter King laughed at his own words, his hand becoming a firm, reassuring touch on Simon’s shoulder. 

Kingly, his mind supplied, Yes, that was the only way to describe this exact blend of pride and poise. Simon suppressed the sudden shiver that tickled his spine. 

“Tell me, do you play?” Winter King asked, gesturing to the piano. 

“Oh, I… do.” Simon said. He’d let his musical interests fall to the wayside in recent years, but yes. 

Winter King sat up straighter as he clapped his hands. “Then how about a duet?” 

And who was Simon to deny his kindly host?

He rolled his shoulders and began a slow song. The keys were a little lighter than he’d expected, the sound a bit shaper, making his first few notes louder than he would have liked. But neither said anything as his playing even out.

And soon a second set of hands joined him on the keys.

“It’s been a while since I’ve had a partner,” Winter King said, taking Simon’s hesitant song and breathing some more life into it. His fingers danced across the piano with far more confidence, taking what Simon started and making it much more his own. 

It was a beautiful song though, as was everything the Winter King touched. And it far out paced Simon’s rusty skills. He paused once he felt that he could no longer keep up. 

“You play very well,” he said, smiling politely. Hands hovering over the keys. 

Winter King beamed. “And you simply flatter me.”

He tapped Simon on the nose, making him blink in surprise. The Winter King edged closer, shrinking the space between them until their knees bumped and their thighs touched. Simon moved on instinct to give them both more space but found himself already at the edge of the bench. 

Winter King studied him with that ever-cheerful expression. “You seem tense, my Simon.”

“Ah, well…” he adjusted his glasses. “A lot on my mind, I suppose.”

Without missing a beat, “And if I could help with that as well?”

Simon blinked and without warning, found them so very close together. The Winter King was leaning over him, making use of his superior height to bear upon him with an eager smile. But it was just so sudden, so much that it left him reeling. 

“I’m terribly sorry,” Simon said, standing, “But you’ve already done so much for me, for us, that–”

A hand reached out and grabbed his wrist. Simon did finally shiver, a little jolt going up his arm. 

Winter King rose, still holding Simon’s wrist. At his full height, he was the picture of grace, yet the hairs on the back of Simon’s neck stood on end. Winter King took Simon’s wrist in both hands, raising it, and…

And pressed a kiss to the back of his hand. 

His breath caught in his throat. Even the Winter King’s lips were as cold as ice. 

A stray memory resurfaced in his mind, of something Cake said when they first arrived. 

“Kiss each other!”

Which he would’ve brushed off as nonsense if it weren’t for what the Winter King said in response. 

“Don’t think it hasn’t occurred to me.”

But the inhabitants of Ooo, of most variants of Ooo, were all just a bit silly and strange, weren't they? Simon thought that surely the Winter King meant nothing by it.

Until now. 

“It’s been quite a long while…” Winter King began, “Since I’ve had a partner.”

He met Simon’s gaze with unflinching sincerity.

Meanwhile, Simon’s brain was being tossed back and forth between denial and shock. And perhaps a third emotion which he couldn’t yet describe. 

He cleared his throat and tried to find his voice. Simon said, “N-now look at who’s flattering who.”

But his meek attempt at humor fell flat. Winter King acted as if he hadn’t even heard it, still holding Simon’s hand. He even wrapped an arm around Simon’s waist, palm pressed against the small of his back. Despite his night clothes and the robe, he still faintly felt that icy touch. 

The Winter King said, “My Simon, tell me. How long have you felt so lonely?”

And he shuddered at that. It wasn’t as if he’d disclosed his own sour past to the Winter King. At least, not in full detail. He hadn’t brought up his sad life as a living relic on display, or the use of magic creatures as batteries for his spells. 

Or just how empty the world felt. How empty he felt. 

“How did you-”

“I can see it plainly,” Winter King said, “I can see it on your face. I see it because I once felt it myself, before I built this wonderful world of mine.”

Again, the space between them was slowly closing. Simon’s body was still ringed by the arm keeping him in place. 

Winter King asked softly, “Who better to be at your side than I? And you at mine? Why don’t I assuage that ache you feel?”

And Simon could have said a million things in response. 

You don’t want me, I’m just an old man. 

I don't feel the same way. 

But Betty–

I can’t. 

Don’t. 

No. 

Please…

Simon said not a word as another frigid hand took his chin and tilted his head back. He merely shut his eyes and let the breath be stolen from his lungs. The Winter King smelled of pine and frost.

He tried not to shiver. And he also tried not to think of Betty. 

That was rather easy. Betty had been human and warm. 

And everything about the Winter King was cold. Cold, but clean and polished and beautiful. Not only that, but willing and wanting. 

When the Winter King pulled away, lips parted and eyes partly lidded, he hummed in delight and seemed not the least bit interested in stopping. His cheerful demeanor was gone now, his hold on Simon’s waist growing tighter. 

And Simon finally identified that third emotion he felt, a kind of fearful longing. In his world, he had grown to hate snow and ice, even rejecting it in his drinks. But he couldn’t deny how familiar it was. 

And try as he might, he couldn’t run from how a part of him still ached for it. 

So he relented, leaning into Winter King’s touch with silent acceptance. 

He said nothing and put up no resistance as the Winter King pressed him against the piano, a wave of discordant notes filling the throne room as he leaned his body into Simon’s and held him and felt him and took from him. 

The cold, once again, was such a great and terrible thing.

[mika-no-sekai-blog]

Word count: 1800+

Warnings: confusion, jealousy (just in case), but otherwise nothing

Part XIII | Part XV

You opened your eyes. The memories of your childhood that Rhysand revived, swirled in your mind. You were on the verge of tears. Parents. Their faces shone bright in your mind. Beautiful, smiling. How could you forget them? And your older brother, ever so loving, caring and protective. His two best friends. Morrigan. Your friends in camps. And so many others. How could you forget them all?

Old feelings mingled with your current ones. It was a bit overwhelming and confusing. You would definitely need time to process the chaos in your head and heart. You should have stopped him sooner, but once you saw fragments of your past, you wanted more.

Big, warm hand squeezed your right one, drawing small circles with a thumb. You looked in that direction. Azriel was kneeling next to you, his eyes scanning your face with worry. You knew him. You knew him for so long. The comfort and peace you felt with him before, doubled. He was always your support, understanding your feelings more than anyone else.

He was worried about you, so you sent him a small smile, assuring him you are okay. Tension in his face melted away, his eyes watered. Even without words he understood. As always.

You turned to your left where you felt another hand holding yours, but the squeeze was much weaker. Rhysand was half sitting, half lying, his side pressed into backrest of sofa, eyes closed. He was pale. If you didn't see his chest heaved with shallow breaths, you would think the worst.

"Rhys?" Your voice was shaking.

Corners of his mouth lifted in a faint smile. "It's the first time you called me Rhys since you came."

"Oh, you jerk." You playfully hit his shoulder and then hugged him. He returned the hug without hesitation. "I'm so sorry," you mumbled into his shoulder. "You should have said something."

"There's nothing to apologize for. I am sorry for all you had to go through. Before and especially since you came here. I know it wasn't easy for you."

You didn't say anything to that mainly because your feelings were all out of place.

"Are you okay?"

"Mm, just bit tired. It was harder than I thought."

"Why didn't you say something? We could-"

"It's okay," he stopped you. "I just need to rest. That's all. And you ought to do so too. I bet you have a lot to think about." He rubbed your back.

You were about to offer him helping to get to his room, but he stopped you before you could open your mouth with shake of his head. "Rest. We will talk about everything later."

Gnawing your lower lip you nodded and stood up. Azriel also got up, following you out of the office, silent like a shadow. Once doors closed behind you, you turned to him.

"I'm fine, Az. Really."

"I'll just walk you to your room."

"I can do that," you smiled. "But I'd love to ask you to take care of him. I think he's more exhausted than he admits." Your gaze travelled back to the office doors.

"Okay," he nodded, looking at you curiously. "Now you really remember." Small amused smile played on his lips, but his eyes were full of sadness and something you couldn't place.

You stepped closer, surprising Azriel with an innocent kiss on his cheek. His body went rigid, eyes widened. This was a game you two used to play, when you were younger, always catching him by surprise. Knowing you since you were born, he usually let his guard down around you, which allowed you to get into his personal space easily. You also learnt a few tricks from him.

"I do," you hummed. His fingers touched the place you kissed and he blushed fiercely. Chuckling you turned around and walked away, leaving him gaping at your back.

You'd turned the corner walking to the main hall towards the staircase.

"I don't understand what he sees in you," a sweet voice spoke from your right. There in the doors to the kitchen stood one of Feyre's sisters, Elain, if you remembered correctly.

"Excuse me?" you raised a brow at her, surprised that she spoke to you.

"Since you came everything is only about you," she said, her brows furrowed. "He also has eyes only for you. Even now, why did he have to be by your side?"

"I have no idea what are you talking about. Who's the he supposed to be anyway?" You'd never talked with her, actually hadn't met her properly until now. But you didn't like the way she looked at you.

Elain looked at you with utter disgust and then just simply pivoted, showing you her back and walked away. Stunned you blinked rapidly. You looked around hoping somebody else witnessed this and could explain you her behaviour. Unfortunately you were alone.

"…bitch…" You heard her low voice as she was muttering something in the kitchen.

Frustrated you returned to your room, decided to forget about that weird incident in the hall and rather concentrate on processing all new feelings.

You took a seat in one of the armchairs you became so fond of and gazing out to the garden you slowly roamed through new memories. It felt like finding pieces of puzzle you didn't realise that were missing. The emptiness you had always felt diminished.

It was hard to say how you felt, what you felt toward people who in few hours changed from strangers to well known faces, family. However you knew for sure that the feelings from before living in Spring Court, weren't so intensive anymore. They were still strong, but strangely subdued at the same time. It was confusing and you could only hope that with time it would clear out.

You didn't know when, but your thoughts wandered back to the cottage. And to him. What was he doing now? Did he already forget about you? Suddenly you felt blue. You'd like to talk with him now. It would certainly help you to sort out the things. You reached for the pendant he gave you, hidden under the clothes. It gave you a feeling of the kind of comfort you felt only with him.

Behind shut eyelids you found yourself back in the forest in front of your cottage, Tamlin stood on the threshold, his back to you. As if feeling your presence, he turned around and when his eyes found yours he smiled happily. Tamlin's emerald eyes and golden hair shone in the sunlight filtering through the treetops. It was so peaceful moment. The moment that was interrupted by a knock on the door.

You exhaled shakily, your heart beating too fast. What was that? It was so real that your chest hurt. You rubbed a non-existent wound and when another soft knock sounded, you called out to whoever it was, to enter. Golden brown head peeked in from behind the door. It was Feyre.

"Can I come in? I brought you something to eat."

You nodded, grateful for her care.

"You missed the lunch, so I thought you might be hungry," she said placing tray on a small table. She looked somehow nervous, eyeing the other armchair. You hadn't talked much with your sister-in-law yet, but she seemed to be a kind person. You asked her to sit down with you. The smile she conjured, was dazzling.

"I just wanted to let you know that Rhys is okay or better say, he will be. Azriel helped him to get to the bed, he ate and now he's napping."

"I'm relieved to hear that," you said and to your own surprise, really meant it. Rhysand was your brother, your blood. He mattered. Words that held no meaning yesterday, were so important now. You pushed those thoughts back before you began spiralling and rather focused on Feyre.

"I'm happy you are here," she whispered. "He needed you. Even though he has all of us, he needed you. He might not admit it openly, but since the tragedy that happened to your mother and you, he wished only for one thing: to have both of you back by his side. He was so lonely."

A lump rose in your throat. You were at a loss for words.

Feyre was nervously playing with her fingers. "I understand how he feels and what this means to him, but.. I noticed that you were.. well, you still are unhappy here. It reminds me of how I felt back at Spring.. I tried to convince him to let you go back. Don't take me wrong. I like you and I'd love you to be here, but if this isn't the place you want to be.."

"But he rejected," you noted, swallowing bitterness in your mouth. Feyre nodded.

"Please, don't be angry with him for that. He believes this is the only way how to protect you."

"Are you angry with Tamlin for doing the same?" You eyed her curiously.

She looked into the garden, her gaze wandered unfocused. "At that time I was angry, very angry. Now I kind of understand. It was his way of dealing with his trauma. He was so kind to me before and even to my family. What happened under the mountain broke us all. And what helped one, hurt someone else. Now seeing into Rhys' heart I do understand how Tamlin felt. I hope he will find his happiness, too." Even though Feyre just whispered the last sentence, she meant it.

Now it was your turn to answer, but you couldn't do so right away. Searching how you actually felt about that, your fingers once again found the pendant, playing with it. "I'm not angry," you said after a while. "Now when I have part of my memories back, I think I understand, too."

"But you still want to return," Feyre finished for you. "To him." A gentle smile spread across her face as she watched your fingers. You nodded.

"Do you like him?"

Your eyes widened. For some reason you were embarrassed. Like Tamlin? Yes, you liked him, but Feyre was probably referring to different kind of 'like'. "I- I like his company," you stuttered.

She giggled. "You can be honest with me. It'll remain just between us. I won't tell anyone."

You pulled your knees up to your chest, distressed. Feyre watched you curiously, head tilted to the side, a knowing grin on her face. "He's a good male and very kind. Lucien said that your presence helped him recover."

"The redhead?" you sat up straight. She nodded. So he wasn't lying when he said they were friends.

Feyre pressed her lips together, light amusement was replaced by seriousness. "Although I'm afraid of what happened with him after your abrupt departure."

After that Feyre left, muttering something about food getting cold and necessary rest, leaving you even more confused and on top of it worried.

Taglist:

@impossibelle @sevikas-whore @b0xerdancer @ladylizzieofdarbyshire @tele86 @mybestfriendmademe @nocasdatsgay @yunloyal @nebarious @isabiss @st0rmyt

[sourbinnie]

☆ wish i could forget.mp3 ☆ [hit me where it hurts pt.2]

/ the sad ending /

♡ genre ¿? ♡ -> double the angst ♡ pair ¿? ♡ -> ot8!skz x gn!reader ♡ plot ¿? ♡ -> words that left scars on you are not easy to forget. ♡ warnings ¿? ♡ -> cursing ; arguments ; no happy endings ♡ request ¿? ♡ -> yes!

first part -> hyung line | maknae line

a/n: so before you read, there’s gonna be a make up version of this reaction. i decided to get the sad one out first because it’s the one i could write rn :] but seriously i am overwhelmed by the support and the love that i have received. i gained so many followers and likes/reblogs that it’s insane to me. thank you all for everything and enjoy the heartbreak! unless you wanna wait for the happier version.

chan ✉

as chan took every step to your shared apartment, everything felt like it was crumbling apart. he couldn't sleep, he felt like he was suffocating in the dorms so he spent most of the night at the studio. exactly the opposite of what you would've wanted and that led him to think the worst of the worst. he knew he had messed up big time, he knew you were only trying to help him and this is how he repays you?

putting the key in the lock, he felt dread in his heart as he walked in. everything looked too perfect, like you weren't even there but as soon as his eyes stopped looking around, he saw you. you were standing there, bloodshot eyes as you finished... packing.

"please don't tell me this is what i think it is." he said and you just looked at him. a sad look in your eyes, as he tried to process everything that was happening and what he was gonna say but nothing was coming out. oh god, he was panicking, he did not want you to leave. "please (y/n) i'll do anything." 

"i made my decision. i would rather not be here if i'm not wanted and if i am gonna be treated like this. i'm sorry but there's nothing you can do that's gonna make me stay." you said and if he didn't feel broken and obsolete before, he was feeling pure numbness now. 

"we can work this out. this was a one time thing!" he said and this time oh did the tears fall from his eyes.

"it's not the first time chris and i think it's not gonna be the last time either." you said picking up your suitcase and heading towards the front door as chan looked in horror at the scene unfolding. "i'm sorry it had to end this way."

"i should be saying sorry, i fucked everything up." he said clearly and you just got close to him again, pressing a kiss to his wet cheek and wiping away the tears. 

"you'll be okay." no, no he definitely wouldn't be as he watched you leave from the apartment you two shared so many memories with and now they're gone. taken from him just like the power in him to stand up, as his legs gave out and the knot in his throat got tighter.

minho ✉

another award and you weren't there. this time for a good reason though and he still couldn't process his words, the ones he spoke with such cruelty and the instant regret that hit him when he would try to call you and would lead to voicemail. when he got off stage and the first thing he did was check his phone to see no messages, he felt like crying right then and there. he was not one to cry at all but since the fight, he felt like he could feel the tears coming in at any minute.

he knew the boys were all still confused about what happened and wondering why you didn't show up anymore. he didn't know how to explain that he was the one who messed up. he felt such disappointment in himself and carried it everywhere with him, he just couldn't function without you. 

he checked his phone again, texting one more time but this time they wouldn't send. no, that could not mean what he thought it meant right? that's not what he's thinking. he decided to leave without explanation and not care about his image or the professionalism of it all, he just wanted to see you and talk. as soon as he found himself in front of your door, he knocked and waited for you to come out. as soon as he saw you in front of him, no words were coming out of his mouth.

"minho? what do you want? i already left your things at the dorms." he didn't even have time to check that and it felt like everything was suddenly drifting away from him. "i know i didn't say anything but i think the things you said were enough for this to happen right?".

"i can't leave you (y/n), i know i fucked up immensely and that you don't want anything to do with me but please i'm asking for another chance." he said and felt his world crumbling when he saw you shake your head. 

"i wish i could forget what you said but i don't think i ever will. maybe it's stupid of me to do this and i will regret it later but right now? it feels like the right choice, goodbye minho." you said as you closed the door and left his figure standing there. 

changbin ✉

chan and jisung decided to go with him to the dorms as they were still trying to figure out what happened. they knew changbin didn't have the biggest temper but they never saw him get mad at you. he eventually said what happened exactly and he could sense the disappointment in his bandmates as he explained it but they were still there to support him through it all. even with that, he felt completely lost and heartbroken, he couldn't seem to forget the look in your eyes.

he decided to try and call you, maybe you had calmed down by that point. maybe you were ready to yell at him for what happened. maybe you wouldn't pick up at all and this would be the way you two drifted apart.

luckily you picked up but not so luckily he would have to hear some heartbreaking words.

"hey bin. i know what you're gonna say and i'm gonna say it before you. i don't think i can forgive you for what you said and i think it's better if we go our separate ways. like you said i get in your way too much and maybe someone else would be better for you." before he could answer, you were hanging up and leaving him absolutely speechless. he didn't even sense the tears coming out of his eyes as he tried to dial your number again and call you but it looked like you turned off your phone.

the fact that he made you feel like this, was gonna haunt him. he wanted to go to your apartment so bad but he found himself like he couldn’t move as he wiped the tears but they did not seem to stop. the part where you said he should be with someone else when all he could think, dream and feel was you. all he wanted was you and yet a part of him knew that after what happened you deserved better.

he sat down eventually and waited for someone to push him out of that state he was in. thankfully felix was there with him as he had no words but at least he held him as he still repeated your words in his mind.

"there's no one better than them lix. there's literally no one." he said as his friend tried to console him but there was no cure for a broken heart.

hyunjin ✉

as much as he insisted he was fine, he was far from it. he didn't know what he was doing most of the time as he expected for you to walk in. he wanted to see you so badly yet he was scared and as the days passed he was sure that this was the end unfortunately. he was tired of waiting so he headed to your work one day, being done with going back and forth and in circles around this fight. he didn't know what he was gonna say as he waited outside but he surely did know that he had to do something before it all fell apart.

"hyunjin? what are you doing here?" you asked and he could already sense by the tone of your voice, you did not want to see him.

"i wanted to talk to you, about what happened and about us." he said and you crossed your arms 'cause the last thing you wanted to do was to fight again with him outside of your work. "listen, i know i should've called you or showed up earlier but-."

"but you didn't and now it's too late. i really don't wanna hear it." you said as you headed towards the opposite direction but he grabbed your wrist before you could walk away. "let go, seriously what the hell hyunjin? you hurt me and then leave me all alone, expecting for me to hear you out?"

"i don't know why i didn't contact you okay? i was a fucking idiot. but please i'm here now and i want to fix things, it's been hell without you." he says honestly and raising his voice. he wasn't mad, he was just frustrated and tired of the fighting but this time he knew he deserved to go through this 'cause what you went through was worse. 

"well i don't want to. i'm done with you and i don't want to see you ever again." he let go then and felt a lonely tear fall from his eye. you went away, far from him and the pain he brought. you didn't want anything to do with him anymore and he knew this would be the last time he saw you so he stood there as he watched you. walk away from him and his life forever.

jisung ✉

you in fact did not come back to jisung. it's been so long without you, he started to forget what being with you was like. every love song turned into a sad heartbreak song in the lyrics he wrote, every step he took was in direction towards your apartment but he couldn't go back there. he felt so alone and broken, how could he be so careless? how could he say that stuff to you? those words kept repeating in his head over and over.

you were never too much and you definitely didn't make his life difficult. you made everything so much better, right now it just felt like it was all crumbling.

"jisung? i'm sorry, i was just packing my stuff." he didn't even know how he got here, he must've confused himself again and thought he was going to the dorms. but here you were standing in front of him with boxes upon boxes of stuff that you had packed. you didn't take the photos or the presents that he gave you and that left a sour taste in his mouth.

"it's okay, it's not like i come here anyways." he said and that left you confused but then you realized that yeah it was hard to walk in here. too many memories that blinded you and saddened the atmosphere. "can we talk?" he asked and you didn't know what there was to talk about.

"i think it's better if we don't. before we say things we regret again." you said and that was a dagger to jisung's heart. of course you were still mad, what was he thinking? that you were gonna give him a second chance? that everything was gonna be alright?

"i will always be sorry (y/n), please know that." he said and you nodded, not believing a word he said. he sighed as he left the apartment, hoping to never come back. he wouldn't see you in it again so what was the point right? no more future that held you two, it was just him on his own again. and that was worse than anything he had ever felt.

felix ✉

he was already calling you as soon as chan got home from dropping you off. he didn't know what came over him when he pronounced those words but he was surely gonna make things up even if it took him everything. he knew you needed distance right now but he needed to know how you were (and guess who's clingy now?). 

"baby, listen i know you don't want to talk to me right now but please i hope you know that i didn't mean a thing i said. i was just in a bad mood but it's not an excuse for what i said and-." he knew he was gonna get cut off, he was just rambling but everything that you said cut through him.

"so that's what you came up with? listen i don't know what gives you the right to use an insecurity of mine against me but i'm not gonna tolerate it. it was a low point for me that you did that and i don't think i'm gonna be able to move on past it especially after i told you that those kinds of comments still hurt." you said clearly, there was no sadness or anger in your voice. it was just plain and simple what you said yet felix felt like falling apart right then and there.

"i know love and i'm deeply sorry. i won't insist on it but please if you reconsider, call me? i know i shouldn't have messed with that. i truly do love you forever and ever." he said but you did not want to hear it so you hanged up and left him right there, with no more words coming out of his mouth. chan who witnessed the whole scene and expected you two to make up but it looked like it was from reality.

"lix, i'm so sorry." he said as to which the other nodded and sighed. he didn't want to cry in front of his hyung but it was inevitable when the tears were just rolling freely through his cheeks. he was wrapped in chan's arms as he let go of what he feared the most and started to think how he was going to handle his life without you in it. 

seungmin ✉

ever since he said those things, everything changed. you two were still together but it was never the same, it felt like he was trying to compensate for the hurt of his words with material things, sweet words and dates. it was enough for him to realize that he was never gonna be able to completely make it up to you because he didn't know how to solve what his words did.

so when he saw you packing even if it hurt so fucking much, he had to let you go. he had to actually live with the reality that you were not be with him anymore, no more fake smiles or pretending to be fine. you weren't okay with him and it showed. 

"i'm sorry it had to be like this. i wish i never said those things to you and we both could be okay again." he said sadly and with a cloudy vision. it felt like all the air was taken from his lungs and like he was trapped in a room with no way out. 

"i wish i could forget them." you said calmly and gave him a little smile as you hugged him one last time. he held you tightly not wanting to let go because this moment would be one that he never forgot. it just pained him that he hurt you so deeply that it made you want to leave. it scarred him that he made so much damage that nothing could repair it even if it wasn't the best solution, he was still trying right?

"i love you (y/n)." there was no response, just your broken smile as you looked at him again and left. it finally broke him that there was no more, no more love, no more relationship and no more holding on. he didn't know what he was gonna do without you and picking up the pieces of what you had been was not the solution. he had to grow up and be better next time in his next relationship. yet he didn't see that happening, he just wanted you and will always want you.

jeongin ✉

did you talk later? no, he wasn't ready to have the conversation. you also weren't ready to confront him about his words. it felt like the perfect picture was ruined immediately when you heard him mutter his cold and harsh words. he felt like he did everything wrong, it was hard to get him out of his room because all he wanted was to close the door and never come out of it. he wanted to see you but everything was stopping him, he truly thought you deserved better this time.

when he finally saw you because you were the one who decided it was enough and you two needed to talk. he felt like falling right then and there in your arms where he belonged but he couldn't do that, at least not again.

"i'm sorry (y/n)." he said and looked at you for a response. he knew he should say more but he couldn't find the right phrasing of things to go with it so he just said the words that came out of his heart. "i should have never said that and i'm deeply sorry that i hurt you."

"i'm sorry for not being what you wanted innie. it's okay, i guess it was gonna happen. i hope you'll be okay after this and that you grow from it." ouch, you didn't know how much these words would be kept in his head like a mantra. he wanted to grow from it now, he wanted to be better right now for you and for you guys to be okay but this was more like a goodbye than a hello.

"please don't go." he said and you just kissed him to shut him up one last time. his hands met your cheeks as he deepened the kiss not wanting this to be your final one but knowing all too well that it was. you would stay there, standing in the living room looking at each other for a while to then let go and leave him stranded like you two just didn't share the most precious and hurtful kiss. it wasn't okay, none of it will be okay without you in his life and as much as he would want to move on, everything would bring him back here again.

[desertfangs]

“ how did you get this scar? ” (for Daniel/Armand if you're still accepting!)

I know it seems like I forgot these but I'm swear I'm still working on them! Work has been a beast and also I'm in the process of moving (!!) so my life is sheer chaos rn. Anyhow, this prompt inspired this little slice of life moment and I hope you enjoy it! It's about 1075 words.

Daniel shifts in the bed, groggy and half-asleep, but as he turns over, he brushes against Armand, who is still there beside him. He’s laying on his side, his amber eyes watching Daniel with a stark intensity, auburn curls stark against the white pillowcase. 

It’s not the first time they’ve shared a bed but it’s the first time since they arrived in London, since Armand gave him an electric taste of his blood and he stopped running. It feels strange, somehow, but also comfortable. 

“Hi,” Daniel says, since Armand is still staring at him. Armand says nothing. Daniel feels that familiar twinge of uncertainty. “Sorry, I must have fallen asleep.” 

“You always get groggy once you’ve reached completion,” Armand says. 

Daniel laughs, delighted by the fact that he knows that about him. Such an intimate thing to say! Four years of running and yet Armand knows him better than anyone else. 

“Yeah, well, your touch is soothing.” He reaches over and rubs Armand’s arm, his warm fingers dancing over the vampire’s cool, pale skin. Armand smiles at him. It’s such a warm, genuine smile that Daniel’s heart soars. 

Daniel moves closer and kisses him, their tongues entwining. When they part, he sits up, leaning against the headboard. A thin sheet covers his legs and hips, though at this point, Armand has seen every part of him too many times to count. “Do you ever sleep in a bed? In the daytime I mean?” 

“No,” Armand says. The smile slowly fades from his face. He looks at the window so Daniel looks at the clock on the bedside table. It’s almost five am. Still early. Late. Whatever. There’s time before sunrise. 

“Always a coffin then? Or a casket? There’s a difference, isn’t there?” 

“Yes.” 

“Yes to which part?” Daniel asks, exasperated at how Armand can say so little, even now that they’re sharing a bed and apartment. Well, during the night, anyhow. And during the day, Daniel is usually passed out and Armand is sleeping god only knows where.  

Armand sits up and smooths his hand down Daniel’s shoulder, along his torso, and stops at his hip. His hand is cool, the warmth of whatever blood he drank earlier faded from him. His body is rigid but his hands can be so soft and they feel like velvet as they trail over his naked body. Armand stops at Daniel’s thigh, just above the knee. He touches a mark on Daniel’s skin. “How did you get this scar?” 

It’s barely a scar now, just a little white patch just under his knee. But Armand is watching him curiously, waiting for the answer.

“I was seven years old and I was trying to do tricks on my bike. The bike went out from under me and I landed on this piece of broken glass that was in the street. My sister ran and got my parents. My dad grabbed me and stood me up but then my mom saw my leg was covered in blood and screamed. The glass was sticking out of my leg and my mom and dad fought about whether or not to remove it.”

“Did it hurt?” Armand’s finger pokes at the spot, long healed.

“A little. I think I was in shock. We went to the hospital and they took the glass out and then I got stitches. It hurt after, I remember that. But mostly I was scared because my mom was so freaked out and I remember asking if I was going to die, and the doctor laughed but my mom looked like she actually thought I might.” 

He shakes his head at the memory, the way the horror on his mother’s face had tugged something loose inside him, some primal fear he’d never felt before. The silence hangs between them. Daniel grabs the pack of cigarettes from the night stand and lights one. 

“What about you, do you have any scars? Or did you, before immortality smoothed them away?” 

Armand doesn’t answer. He keeps staring at the little white mark on Daniel’s leg. Then he bends down and kisses it, his lips feather soft. It sends tingles up Daniel’s spine. He slides into Daniel’s lap and removes the cigarette from his lips, replacing it with his mouth. Daniel doesn’t complain. He kisses him passionately, letting Armand’s fangs scrape against his tongue as he delves into his cool mouth. He imagines those fangs scraping over his throat, this thigh, his ankle. 

You could scar me, Daniel thinks. The thought is unbidden, the sort of thing that comes to mind in the throes of passion. But the idea of Armand leaving some sort of mark on him with his fangs is hot as hell. He imagines Armand biting him somewhere—the meat of his thigh, his upper arm—and not healing the wound. His pulse races. 

Armand pulls back out of the kiss, his face so close that Daniel can still feel him there. His eyes are huge and he tilts his head, as if trying to figure something out. 

And then he pulls away from Daniel, climbing off of him. He stands and collects his shirt from where Daniel had tossed it on the floor. 

“Leaving already?” Daniel tries to sound casual, like he’s not bothered at Armand having to go, but in truth, his heart aches at the thought. 

Armand nods toward the window. There is more color in the sky and it is inching toward sunrise. Daniel sighs. He wants to go with Armand, to slip into his coffin and curl against him for the day. 

Armand comes back to the bed and kisses him again, his mouth gentle against Daniel’s. “Sleep, beloved. I’ll be back at sunset.”

Armand is gone in a flash, almost as quick as a puff of smoke, like the wisp of it trailing from the tip of the cigarette Armand set, still burning, in the ashtray. He picks it up and brings it to his lips.

He touches his neck where four years prior, Louis bit him. There’s no mark left, no scar, just the memory of Louis’ fangs in his throat, holding him as he drank. No mark from where Armand drank from him just a week ago in Pompeii. And yet both nights sent him careening in a whole new direction and changed his life completely. 

 He thinks it’s funny how something can leave a lasting mark with no outward sign.