#this is not a part of my life that I've really talked about very much.
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nicholas chavez x ex!reader
a/n: no disrespect to either of them or relationship all of this is just fiction!
Nicholas and y/n had a special connection when they dated. Their time together was filled with laughter, shared secrets, and memorable moments. However, as life moved on, they drifted apart, and Nicholas eventually found himself in a new relationship with a girl named Victoria.
Victoria is wonderful—kind, smart, and everything Nicholas could ask for in a girlfriend. Yet, despite his happiness with her, y/n is always in the back of his mind. He often finds himself reminiscing about the times he spent with y/n, the unique bond they shared, and the way she understood him like no one else.
Even though Nicholas tries to focus on his present with Victoria, there are moments when a song, a place, or a random memory brings y/n back to the forefront of his thoughts. He wonders how she's doing, if she thinks about him too, and whether their paths will cross again. This lingering presence of y/n in his mind makes him question if he ever truly moved on, or if a part of him will always belong to her.
Nicholas and Victoria were out for a casual stroll one Saturday afternoon when they unexpectedly ran into y/n. The encounter took Nicholas by surprise, and he felt his heart skip a beat. Y/n looked as beautiful and confident as ever, and seeing her brought a rush of memories flooding back.
"Hey, y/n. It's been a while. How have you been?" Nicholas asked, trying to keep his composure.
"I've been good. Just busy with work and everything. How about you?" Y/n replied with a warm smile.
"I've been alright. This is Victoria, by the way. Victoria, this is y/n," Nicholas introduced them, his voice slightly shaky.
"Nice to meet you, y/n!" Victoria said cheerfully.
"Nice to meet you too, Victoria. So, what have you been up to, Nicholas?" Y/n asked, her eyes lingering on him.
"Oh, you know, just the usual. Work's been keeping me busy. It's really good to see you, though," Nicholas responded, feeling a mix of emotions.
"Yeah, it's good to see you too. You look well," y/n said, her smile softening.
"Thanks. You too," Nicholas managed to say, his mind racing.
Victoria, sensing the tension, chimed in, "We should catch up sometime, all of us. It would be fun."
"Sure, that sounds nice," y/n agreed. "Well, I should get going. It was great running into you both."
"Yeah, take care, y/n," Nicholas said, watching her walk away.
As y/n disappeared into the crowd, Nicholas couldn't help but feel a pang of longing. He realized that his feelings for her were still very much alive, leaving him deep in thought about what to do next.
Victoria and Nicholas had been having a wonderful evening at home when the topic of y/n came up. It started innocently enough, with Nicholas mentioning their recent encounter.
"You know, it was really nice seeing y/n the other day," Nicholas said, trying to keep his tone casual.
Victoria's expression changed slightly. "Yeah, it was. But, Nicholas, I've noticed you talk about her a lot lately."
Nicholas looked puzzled. "What do you mean? She's just an old friend."
"Is she really just an old friend?" Victoria asked, her voice growing more tense. "Because it feels like there's more to it."
Nicholas sighed. "Victoria, you're overthinking this. Y/n and I have history, but that's all in the past. You're the one I'm with now."
Victoria shook her head. "I don't know, Nicholas. It just feels like there's something unresolved between you two. And it bothers me."
Nicholas's frustration began to show. "What do you want me to do, Victoria? I can't erase my past. Y/n is a part of it, but she doesn't have to be a threat to us."
"I just need to know that you're fully committed to us," Victoria said, her eyes pleading.
"I am committed to us," Nicholas said firmly. "But I can't change the fact that y/n was a big part of my life. You have to trust me."
Victoria looked away, tears welling up in her eyes. "It's hard to trust when I see how you look at her."
Nicholas softened, stepping closer to her. "Victoria, I love you. I'll do whatever it takes to make you feel secure. But you have to believe me when I say that Lauren is just a friend now."
Victoria nodded slowly, wiping her tears. "Okay, Nicholas. I believe you. But let's not talk about y/n anymore. Let's focus on us."
"Agreed," Nicholas said, pulling her into a hug. "Let's focus on us."
As they held each other, Nicholas hoped that this would be the end of the tension between them. He knew he had to prove his commitment to Victoria and make sure she felt secure in their relationship.
Nicholas and Victoria were at the local bar when they unexpectedly bumped into y/n again. It was a moment of surprise for all three, but Victoria's reaction was different. As she watched Nicholas and y/n exchange warm smiles and familiar glances, something clicked in her mind. She realized that the connection between Nicholas and y/n was deeper than she had ever imagined. It was in that instant that Victoria understood the true nature of their bond, and a mix of emotions washed over her, leaving her both intrigued and contemplative about what this meant for their future.
Nicholas and Victoria were sitting in their living room when the tension that had been building up finally reached a boiling point. The topic of y/n had come up once again, and it was clear that Victoria was not happy about it.
"Nicholas, I can't believe you're still hung up on her," Victoria said, frustration evident in her voice. "Every time we run into y/n, you act like she's the only person in the room."
Nicholas sighed, rubbing his temples. "Victoria, it's not like that. Y/n and I have a history, yes, but it doesn't mean I'm still in love with her. We're just friends now."
"Friends? Really?" Victoria shot back. "Because it sure doesn't seem that way. You get this look in your eyes whenever she's around, like you're remembering something more than just a friendship."
"That's not fair," Nicholas replied, his voice rising. "I can't control how I feel. But I'm with you now, and that's what matters."
"But is it really?" Victoria asked, her eyes filling with tears. "Because it feels like I'm always competing with her ghost. I need to know that you're fully here with me, not just physically but emotionally too."
Nicholas took a deep breath, trying to calm himself. "Victoria, I care about you a lot. I don't want you to feel like you're second to anyone. I'm sorry if I've made you feel that way."
Victoria looked at him, her expression softening slightly. "I just need to know that I can trust you, Nicholas. That you're not going to run back to her the moment things get tough between us."
"I promise you, Victoria," Nicholas said, taking her hand. "I'm committed to us. I'll do whatever it takes to prove that to you."
As they sat there, holding each other's hands, they both realized that this was a turning point in their relationship. They had to work through these issues if they wanted to move forward together.
Nicholas had been feeling increasingly guilty about his relationship with Victoria. He knew deep down that he couldn't continue pretending everything was fine. One evening, he finally mustered the courage to talk to her.
"Victoria, we need to talk," Nicholas began, his voice heavy with emotion. "I can't keep doing this. It's not fair to you or to me. I still have feelings for y/n, and it's not right to lead you on."
Victoria looked at him, her eyes filled with a mix of hurt and understanding. "I knew this was coming, Nicholas. I just hoped things would change."
"I'm so sorry," Nicholas said, his heart breaking at the sight of her tears. "You deserve someone who can give you their whole heart, and I can't do that right now."
After the difficult conversation, Nicholas felt a weight lift off his shoulders, but he was also filled with a sense of loss. He decided to reach out to y/n, needing someone to talk to.
"Y/n, I ended things with Victoria," he confessed over the phone. "I couldn't keep pretending. But now, I feel so lost."
Y/n’s voice was gentle but firm. "Nicholas, I still love you, but we can't be together. Not right now. You need to figure things out for yourself first."
Nicholas sighed, feeling the sting of her words. "I understand, y/n. I just needed to hear your voice."
They both knew that this was a time for healing and self-discovery. Even though they couldn't be together, their connection remained a source of comfort and strength for Nicholas.
#nicholas alexander chavez#nicholas chavez#nicholas chavez imagine#nicholas chavez x reader#nicholas chavez x y/n#nicholaschavezimagines#nicholas chavez fanfiction#nicholas alexander chavez fanfic#nicholas chavez imagines#nicholas chavez fluff#nicholas alexander chavez fanfiction#nicholas alexander chavez Imagines
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I wanted to ask, what do each of the Frankies think of the contestant?
Real Frankie:
He is the rabbit that likes the contestant a little too much. Obsessive and possessive he doesn't let them out of his sight unless he has a good reason to. And while he plays up the part of caring for the contestant, maybe even playing into the romance idea, there is absolutely no love there. He is manipulative, cunning and malicious at his core and the contestant is more than aware of this and knows how this is all going to play out in the end. When they no longer prove to be useful, Frankie will dispose of them. Will he be sad doing it, maybe, but in the end ending them with his own hands will the greatest thrill (plus think of the ratings!)! In the end, while he won't outright hurt the contestant (physically anyway) he still can't be trusted.
Cartoon Frankie:
"Hate. Let me tell you how much I've come to hate you since you turned up on my show." (Insert AM speech here yadda yadda) So toon Frankie is the one who hates the contestant the most, despises them actually. They are the reason his show was "ruined" and why he finally lost and being the brat that he is he still holds the grudge regardless if the contestant saved the show in the end. But at the same time they are the only human to stand up to him, to talk back, to make jokes at his expense and it drives him mad. He wants to put this little human in their place and remind them who's in charge (how he plans to do that is really up to the imagination), see them on their knees begging for mercy but on the other hand wouldn't it be fun to be put into his place by them from time to time. He's very internally conflicted by the contestant, he wants them dead, he wants their undivided attention, he wants from pleading for their life, he wants them to talk down to him. He a mixed up bunny and that only pisses him off more.
Monster Frankie:
Simply, he wants to eat his face. He is straight to the point, he doesn't like the contestant (considering they did kill him) and will be hostile to him but know he can't do anything to him right now. So they kinda exist in a weird limbo, where yes Frankie will chase him, but he isn't trying to kill him, maybe throw him a round a little like a cat with a mouse but that's all. Until the next season of course. He isn't as vocal about his feelings towards them but it's clear he is still bitter about what happened but does at least hold some respect for them, hence why he listens to Real Frankie and not Toon Frankie about the contestant's fate. He rarely interacts with them due to the contestant being the most frightened of him but will occasionally drift around them like a house cat merely to spend time in their presence until he gets that look in his eye and it's time to play again.
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I need to yap desperately about one single gripe I have with this game. MAJOR MAJOR MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD read at your own discretion
The first half is me ranting about how much certain things mean to me and how impacted I was, and the actual gripe comes closer to the end.
I'll preface this by saying this post is about Varric's death and my rage and despair regarding it, but more so about my Rook's.
I've seen people who said they picked up on the hints about whatnot, who knew before the Fade Prison. I was not one of those people. I was so relieved when I saw him after the Prologue that I didn't think twice, because I knew that it would destroy me the second shit started going wrong.
I was already not having a good time when I started the game simply because Varric was getting older. I don't handle aging well or death, and his design showing his age, and the comments he would make about "getting too old for this" just made my heart break.
And then shit got worse. I sobbed disgustingly when that knife went into Varric's chest.
After Rook woke up from talking to Solas and she heard Varric, I was so gods damned relieved. And my Rook was better taken care of by Varric in that year she spent with him than she was in the rest of her entire life.
I cried from the end of Ghilan'nain's fight until the romance scene and on and off after that. I got so used to visiting Varric just to be comforted by his presence. Inquisition was the biggest part of my life for a year and a half when I was just a kid.
I did really bad middle school age writing for it but regardless of the quality, those characters were built up in my head becoming even more than they were in the game. Varric was my biggest support character through everything I was going through at the time.
I don't talk about it much, but I didn't have a great childhood, and I know a lot of people didn't, but I coped with it through writing and video games. Varric was the one supporting me through the abuse I suffered and writing was the way I processed how bad things really were.
When Rook was in the prison she said "What am I going to find here?" And Varric said "I think you already know, kid." I DIDN'T until he said that. The second he said that my entire chest tightened and I just said "No" out loud as I watched Rook find his body.
Now for my real complaint!!!
Rook never gets the chance to grieve Varric. They go from talking to him every day to finding out he's dead and it was all a lie. I have personally never been more fucking pissed at Solas than I am now. But Rook comes back and they have that kind of "closing off" scene with Varric's empty bed (which was so hard to go through btw). And then they fuck their pookie LIKE I CANNOT BE THE ONLY ONE UPSET ABT THAT
FYM I gotta find out my dad is dead and then Rook is up for boning like there's no fucking way unless it's to cope. And at least pertaining to the Lucanis romance, Rook is processing everything that happened and they can say "So much has happened, I just don't know how to feel."
And rather than getting to process that in some kind of way, the devs said nah this scene serves one singular purpose, and Lucanis says "I do" and then dicks them down.
Personally, I felt very dismissed despite being overjoyed about finally having the romance scene, I couldn't even enjoy it with everything that happened prior.
Rook deserved the chance to completely break down after everything they went through. Tbh i don't know how they kept it together. Varric said "don't get all misty eyed" and i thought to myself that's way too delicate a term for what's happening here, I was fully ugly crying.
Fuck your "I had a good run" I still need you bitch.
All this to say I'm very upset, and I'm running my second playthrough and every time I look at, hear, or talk to Varric I tear up again. Wtf Bioware.
Rook should've gotten the chance to actually talk about what Solas did to them, especially in the sense that he made them believe Varric was still there. Or at least get to properly grieve the person who was their closest friend for a long time.
I have very strong feelings about this obviously
#dragon age the veilguard spoilers#dragon age the veilguard#datv spoilers#datv#datv varric#dav#dav spoilers#dragon age#dragon age 4 spoilers#dragon age 4#dragon age dreadwolf#dragon age dreadwolf spoilers#dragon age varric#varric#varric tethras#da varric#dragon age the veilguard companions#dragon age the veilguard romance#lucanis#lucanis dellamorte#rook x lucanis#da4 lucanis#dragon age lucanis#lucanis x rook#lucanis romance#lucanis spoilers#taylor’s a yapper 🗣️
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𝐃𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐅𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐯𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 🐦⬛
⤷ gender neutral, ambiguous race, and any size reader. Requests are open, thank you for reading!
a/n: I've added Victor into this, but I want to have a conversation about if he can be a romantic partner - or he will always be platonic?
ᴹᵃˢᵗᵉʳˡᶤˢᵗ | ᴹᵃˢᵗᵉʳˡᶤˢᵗ ᴵᴵ
You're still in Fromville, not having escaped yet but making the best of it.
𝑩𝒐𝒚𝒅 ⋆✴︎˚。⋆
・Domesticity to Boyd is so much different in this town compared to the 'real' world.
・For example, he would be awake before you, no matter the day just so he could surprise you with your favourite drink and a pastry each morning.
・The chores would be split 50/50, with Boyd usually picking up any slack (he doesn't mind at all)
・He loves doing the laundry, folding your clothes with so much care.
・But here... his actions to show his love are limited and it kinda pisses him off
・But you constantly remind him of all the good he's done here and how he keeps everyone together.
・You celebrate every win, even the small ones.
・Boyd is big on DIY, and loves fixing up things for you. Anything you ask - you want a different type of curtain, or you want part of the window patched up - he does NOT let you do it. That is HIS job.
・Massaging his shoulders at night, feeling how taught he is. This town is so hard on him. It constantly makes you wonder, why him?
・You do have one rule though: last one in bed has to make it!
・Boyd seems like the type of person to keep everything about himself to himself. But that isn't true. He likes telling you things, he enjoys opening up to you.
・One really important factor in your relationship is the challenges of town and its mysteries.
・Many people in town were basically betting how long you two would together.
・But what they didn't know, was that the horrors STRENGTHENED your bond. It made you both rely on each other so deeply.
・Having a partner means so much to him.
・Boyd loves you so much. He would never burden you with what he knows, but he loves when you have random conversations.
・It makes things feel just a bit more normal. It gives him hope.
𝑲𝒆𝒏𝒏𝒚 ⋆✴︎˚。⋆
・Mornings and nights are especially special to you both
・Slow, careful, mindful, warm and cosy.
・Touching each other in some way - hugging each other from behind, pinkies entwined, cheek kisses, forehead kisses, rubbing noses together - if anyone else saw you too they would gag (ITS CALLED LOVE)
・Kenny LOVES tucking you in at night.
"You comfy now?" As he wedges the blanket under the side of your body.
"Yes Kenny! Now get in bed you loser!" You answer laughing.
"Okay, okay, I'm just looking after the most important person in my life thank you very much."
・You love listening to him; to his stories about his childhood up until he came to town.
・One of Kenny's favourite things is when you read to him. Even if you don't have a book in front of you, he just wants you to recount as much as you can from books you have read.
・Might be kind of painful, but you two like talking about how life would be like together outside of this hell.
・Owning two cats, two dogs, maybe some fish.
・Whenever you hear the creatures screeching, you automatically cling to Kenny, you can't help it. You HATE the noises.
・But you always feel safe around Kenny. Always.
"I've got you. I swear to god I'll never let anything happen to you."
𝑱𝒂𝒅𝒆 ⋆✴︎˚。⋆
・Every morning he gives you a kiss on the head and 'tip toes' out of the room, trying not to disturb you.
・You usually yell at him to get back in bed
"My looooooove, I have important business to attend to!"
・The bed is pressed up against the wall, and Jade says if someone/something were to enter the room, he would be the first thing they see
・From then he starts his daily ritual of figuring out how to get the hell home
・Jade teaches you A LOT of stuff. And you're always surprised by how well he does at teaching. He's patient (only with you but you don't know that), and takes his time to teach in ways you'll understand (once again, only for you...)
・He is like a walking computer at times. Really good with dates and great with measurements.
・But one thing he is terrible about is the fact that he's a repeat offender blanket stealer. Absolute criminal.
・No matter how much you tug and pull, or wrap yourself in it, Jade somehow unravels you in his sleep and takes the blanket.
・When you both wake up, you've practically snuggled underneath him...
"Babe, what are you doing?"
"You stole the blanket again and I got cold," you reply muffled beneath him. He's very warm.
"Oh god, sorry! We ah, we should probably get more blankets then... god why didn't you wake me?"
"Wake you? Ever since we got our own place, you've slept like you've never done so in your life!"
・It was quiet before he replied, and then he wrapped his arms around you.
"That's because I haven't sleep properly before I met you."
𝑹𝒂𝒏𝒅𝒂𝒍𝒍 ⋆✴︎˚。⋆
・Your relationship with Randall is one that surprises you. Constantly.
・People don't see him the way you do. At times they start to though.
・But only you get to see his true soft side. The side that moves the hair from your face, kisses your forehead, nudges his nose against your own.
・You are the ONLY person to make him laugh.
・He knows so much about you - the way you like your clothes folded or hung up. He knows which books are your favourite, which song you could listen to on replay.
・Music is a big thing to Randall, and the fact that he can't just randomly play something on his phone gets him really down.
・So one night you guys make a list of every song you like, when you heard it and what it made you feel
・Making each other guess who you were before arriving in hell.
"Hmm... you were ... a ... farmhand on a ranch..."
"What the fuck Y/N."
"What? Were you?"
"Oh yeah sure, you hit the nail straight on the head sweetcheeks," and then he rolled his eyes.
・You laugh, loving when he gets 'annoyed' (you know he can never really be annoyed with you right?)
・You know each other's favourite tv shows, colours, smells, literature and so on. You whisper to each other through the night, trying to take your mind off of the screeching coming from outside.
𝑬𝒍𝒍𝒊𝒔 ⋆✴︎˚。⋆
・Always the last to get up, sometimes he wakes before you but he'll still lay in bed, watching you sleep. Sometimes blowing air on your face when it's been a few hours and he gets bored
・Leaving sweet notes in unexpected places, they range from:
'hey baby, went down to do some work in the greenhouse, love you xx' to 'yo sexy honey see you tonight ;)'
・And you keep every single one of them. You have a sort of time capsule thing underneath the bed in one of your bags. Just small photos, letters written to each other, etc.
・Side note - Ellis is a cheeky man who loves to rile you up. Push your buttons. Make you red in the face.
・But he knows when enough is enough; he's extremely intune with your moods and doesn't have to ask when the days get too much.
・LOVES MAKING UP RANDOM SONGS ABOUT YOU, they are terrible but they make you laugh
・CONSTANTLY setting up spontaneous things for you guys to do. Seeing a smile on your face is the best thing he has ever seen.
・Literally puppy love.
・You guys seem to be able to talk to each other mind to mind. Glances from across the room are easily read by one another.
𝑽𝒊𝒄𝒕𝒐𝒓 ⋆✴︎˚。⋆
PSA: As I said above, I'm not sure if Victor can be a romantic partner - I would love everyone's thoughts on it and maybe we can come to some kind of agreement??? Anyway, read this how you like ⟡☾⚝☽⟡
・Home...this town is the only home that Victor had ever truly known.
・How could you show him that the way he'd been living was not normal? That he should be able to feel safe, he should have gone to school - maybe even his drawing could have evolved into something astonishing
・So, in little ways you introduce this life to him
・He can't remember his birthday (so you help him choose one) and the two of you, along with Ethan, Tabitha and Julie celebrate
・...home decor projects are mostly just Victor's drawings. The really scary ones, you ask to be put away and he obliges <3
・Victor is used to living with other being, but not sleeping in the same room as another person.
・You would also need to get used to his blatant honesty. It isn't like he's trying to hurt you but he can just be brutally honest.
・Picnics in your room where you scavenge whatever food you can and talk about the funniest things you've seen people do
"I saw Jim ... trip over today," Victor says in a hushed voice, a cookie halfway to his mouth.
You burst out laughing, even snorting as you imagine the uppity Jim Matthews take a tumble.
"God, I wish I saw that."
・At first Victor didn't want another friend. He didn't want to get close to someone, he knew something would happen to you. You'd be taken away from him.
・But you swore to him that you would always be there for him.
・In town, and when everyone leaves. You've told him that you can be his home, his family.
#witchthewriter#headcanons#from series#from epix imagine#from fanfiction#from mgm#from tv#from tv series#from tv show#victor kavanaugh#from#randall kirkland x reader#randall kirkland#randal kirkland#kenny liu#kenny liu x reader#boyd stevens#jade herrera#jade herrera x reader#jade herrera imagine#witch the writer's headcanons#preferences#From preferences#fromville
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DATV Spoiler Free Review
I beat Veilguard a couple days ago and have had some time to let it settle in my brain. So, without getting into the nitty gritty and more spoilery things, here are my overall feelings on the game.
The Great:
The world itself. The scenery. It was really gorgeous and felt fully alive in a way that none of the previous games have quite managed. Since it wasn't as open world as DAI nor as narrow in scope as DA2 (nor as old as DAO lol), it felt more vital. Definitely a place where the advances in graphics helped, I'm sure.
The Good:
The companions. I wouldn't say any of them blew me away but they all at least ranged from enjoyable to very good. I definitely had my quibbles here and there but I think they were all pretty solid. As such, though I've only done one romance, I'll suppose they're all good. A bit... sparse in my experience and from what I've been hearing, but nice enough.
Overall, I also think the story was pretty good. Like much in this game, nothing that blew me away, but solidly compelling.
Also, mechanically, the gameplay and the glamour system. It still doesn't feel like DA to me but it was enjoyable once I got used to it. It works well with how I play games. And it was nice to just set looks for myself and my companions and not worry about stats vs appearance.
Rook. I have some definite Complaints, and so this point is probably closer to the good to mid range, but they did a pretty good job with letting you pull in your faction stuff. I'm prevented from saying great because it feels like, even with what are supposed to be rougher dialogue choices, you're limited to being mildly pleasant.
The Mid:
The music. This is tragic to me because every previous game had some really standout songs and DAI especially was such a solid soundtrack. I love soundtrack music. Also because Hans Zimmer! I love Hans Zimmer. But the entire thing felt very generic epic fantasy to me. It wasn't bad but it didn't feel good. The only times I ended up moved by the music was when they lifted DAI songs.
The lack of imports. It wasn't the end of the world but did make some cameos feel really off. And for all the talk of making what few things were imported matter, that really didn't feel like the case at all (unless you were in a specific subset of players). I didn't care too much, but it was just enough to make things feel weird, especially with characters like Harding who are so attached to previous stuff.
The Bad:
The world felt so sanitized. I have no issue getting rid of real life bigotry that makes so sense in the context of the world. For example, the sexism in DAO especially made no sense. That said, there was a lot of in world nastiness that is just... gone. The game does a lot of telling us the elves have it bad but doesn't show it. No one bats an eye at a Tevinter mage running about outside of Tevinter. No one cares about a Qunari in occupied Treviso. I suppose it's not the worst thing in the world but it feels weird, especially when it's so central to Solas' motivations.
This sanitization carried on through pretty much everything. All of the factions are presented as good and heroic, even the ones that are historically pretty shady. Your companions are all pleasant and palatable. They have the occasional minor squabble but even when they almost have actual beef, it's solved super easily. You might get some disapproval for decisions but companions never seem to much care or hold it against you, even on really big things. I don't need DA2 levels of interparty drama but, boy did I want a bit more tooth sometimes.
The Awful:
I can't get into it without spoilers but it did a Thing that Bioware sometimes likes to do that I absolutely loathe. This is definitely personal but it ruined some of my desire to replay.
Overall:
I'd give the game a 7/10 or maybe 6/10, depending on how I'm feeling. It was enjoyable for the most part but it had so many things that felt like splinters. Lots of little things that stuck under my skin and bothered me. Would I recommend it? Genuinely depends on the person.
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i would LOVE to hear you talk about music in your dr, music, art, writing/poetry, etc, is one of THE main reasons i'm shifting, and i never see anyone talk about it
I also never see anyone talking about this, and it is such a big part of shifting that I have grown to love so much :,) music and media really holds us together, no matter where we are! here is my best explanation of the music in my weasley reality!
𝒲izarding ℳusic !
TO START, I have noticed that the music and the bands that are popular have a lot of scattered influence from many eras and genres. it is still popular to hear songs on the WWN with lots of classic jazz influence, and then the next song will be a witchy synth anthem inspired by muggle technology and the pop culture of the 80s--- THE RANGE IS CRAZY!
for example: in my Weasley reality, Celestina Warbeck is arguably the most popular and well listened to musician of the century, and she really paved the way for wizarding artists changing their styles and taking influence from muggle music. she had many different eras, ranging from jazz to pop to surprisingly.. witchy rock!
even in her old age (I think she is around 80 years old?), she has still released singles that push different styles and experiment with the ever changing world of music. although, some people really dislike her music simply because it is played so much.
(I remember once I was talking to my mom about her when we saw a live Celestina rendition at the Harry Potter theme park, and my mom said she sounded like the wizarding world version of Taylor Swift. IT IS SO TRUE THOUGH, because she even has a dedicated fanbase that call themselves the Banshees. crazy!)
Another very cool thing about music in the wizarding world is charmed music.
as in this reality, music has evident "energy" that can make you feel a whole range of emotions... but for musicians with magic, that can take on a whole different meaning! it is almost like subliminal messaging, but songs can be "enchanted" with spells through lyrics or have sounds and choruses that are intended to put you in a trance.
this is really common with wizarding party music! I mentioned it in another post, but one of my all time favorite songs is "Man of Midnight" by Celestina Warbeck... the song is known for being bewitching, even if it does not sound fully like a "party song". I have no idea how to describe it, but when I listen to the song I feel like the most powerful person alive? I always tell Fred that it is a siren song.. and that is honestly the closest I can describe it. He just says it makes him alive with motivation and that is why we listen to it at least once when we do work together !
Another form of charmed music is sports chants. a common theme with these chants is their appearance throughout wizarding history, often carrying ancient and intense emotion within their words.
I have only experienced this one time, and it was at the League Cup (Kestrels V Harpies). When the Kestrels were ahead, one of the Irish bands that played in the fairgrounds started singing an old Irish song that originated from the game of Aingingein. even though the game is not played anymore, everyone knows the song. it is almost like a representation of Irish pride?
so when the whole charged up crowd started chanting, it felt like there was ancient and intense game spirit coursing through the stadium. I wasn't even rooting for the Kestrels, but damn I felt like standing on my seat and declaring that I would die for Ireland or something 😭 i've never in my ENTIRE life felt so spiritual about the opposing team, and within a minute of the stadium chanting!
Something else I find very very cool about wizarding music in my desired reality is how music is distributed.
they regularly use common things like vinyls and the radio, and magical concerts happen very often.. but something I didn't expect were lyrical signatures.
these are a weird invention. as the name suggests, these musical souvenirs are similar to a signature of pages in a book... however, they are also very similar to singing birthday cards.
many wizarding bands will sell these mini booklets that showcase a song (or songs) on their pages, and when you open the booklet or flip to a certain page, the song will play. it is seriously the most genius thing ever!
many of these booklets are formatted like a CD, with the album cover being on the front, the first page talking about the album and the band accomplishments of the year, and the next pages each showcasing songs from the collection. it is also very common to have the lyrics on the left side, with song information and sometimes a themed image on the right side.
I had NO idea these would be so popular in my DR. they are given as gifts, mailed to relatives and friends who may not have access to them around the world, and even collected! it is seriously like the wizarding CD. Bill has this epic collection of signatures that he has alphabetized and organized by genre, and he even had a custom box with slots to store them. he's the coolest brother!!
this form of music is so fun.. you can just open up to the song you like and place it open on table, or you can charm it to flip from beginning to end to enjoy the whole album. definitely the most unexpected yet coolest thing that I have discovered while shifting!!
i'll probably make a pt. 2 of my favorite magical bands and musicians, as I have so much I could say and I think they deserve their own section! thank you if you have read this far, and I really appreciate how kind you all were in my absence :,)
good luck shifting everyone!!
#reality shifting#harry potter shifting#shiftblr#shifting#wizarding world#hogwarts shifting#shifting community#desired reality#shifting realities#shifting blog#shifting to hogwarts
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Thoughts on whereserpentswalk? I know they're controversial on jumblr and you seem trustworthy
Tagging them as whilst I will answer, I don't like talking behind peoples backs. I also did reach out to get the okay to post as it does deal with someone's identity. @whereserpentswalk
I'm not sure 100% why they're considered controversial as I have never heard of them before. I'm like 90% sure this is in reference to them being a pagan jew aka ethnically jewish and religiously pagan.
Because Judaism is an ethnoreligion, the topic of being ethnically jewish but not practicing judaism and instead another religion is a complicated and nuanced one. Each jew has their own opinion on this, two jews 3 opinions type deal.
Obviously, if you worship or idolize any deity or similar category, besides Hashem, you are not longer practicing judaism. They do not claim to be practicing judaism, so I and hopefully everyone else should have no issue with that specific bit.
In regards to whether or not they can still call themselves jewish.
Overall, I don't really care? Like there are so many other intracommunity topics which matter more than this in my own opinion.
The only thing which doesn't fall into this are messianic jews, because whilst a lot are lead to believe they are ethnically jewish, most aren't. And the religion wasn't started by jews. Like jews didn't start believing in Jesus and that's how it came about. It was started by non ethnically jewish Christians who decided they were the real jews, which is where the misleading of messianics as a whole being ethnically comes from. I'm sure there are messianics who have jewish blood as nothing is impossible when it comes to types of people believing in a certain religion, but the majority of messiancs do not have jewish blood.
But whereserpantswalk is pagan not messianic so like again, doesn't fall into that.
I'm going to be speaking very general here and not directed at whereserpantswalk.
Like besides messianic jews being the exception, I don't super care.
I myself dabbled in paganism when I was a teen and exploring religion. I don't really talk about it much not because I dislike paganism or think it's bad or anything. I just had religious psychosis surronding it as I am a diagnosed schizo so don't really like to talk about that point of my life online mainly for my safety as some people may use it to try to trigger an episode.
Drawing from my own experiences from that time which I am willing to share, my jewish culture was still important. I grew up orthodox and that doesn't all just go away. Same thing if you grow up reform.
I still participated in secular versions of the Jewish holidays. I still held Jewish values. I still did things certain ways because I was raised jewish, and that doesn't really just go away.
To give like a definitive answer, if someone born Jewish and converts out of Judaism, gets rid of all ties to Jewish culture, including secular Jewish culture. Because Judaism is an ethno religion, I personally don't see any point in continuing to refer to yourself as Jewish. It is a tribe. If you turn your back on the tribe completely and cut all ties, then you are no longer part of the tribe. If you still keep some connection then to me personally I do see a point in calling yourself ethnically jewish as you are still connected to the tribe.
Overall, I don't really care. Like I know I've said this a bazillion times already. The majority of jews are either religious or secular. I see no point in kicking up a fuss about a tiny group of jews.
I believe in inclusive judaism, where people with varying attachment to the tribe are welcome as long as they have some or want a connection to the tribe and convert properly.
This isn't like some hard, set in stone opinion I have. There are more important topics at hand right now like genuine jew fakers than someone with jewish blood who practices paganism.
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3.189 Correction
When story time ended, Sophia took Desi to the bathroom and washed away the mess. With a few moments to myself, I went to the real estate website to see our house again and choose which side we'll call home. Both houses have an identical layout, so it really boiled down to which furniture we liked more. The gray house had a more sophisticated vibe, while the blue house was more relaxed and comfortable. Choosing was a lot harder than I imagined because they both were nice, and I couldn't go wrong with either. Ultimately, however, I chose the gray one. I figured since I'm taking on all the risk, it's only right we live in the fancier one. Just as I picked up the phone to call Less and tell her we have a house, someone knocked at the front door. It was Dub! I let him in and told him I was just thinking of him yesterday. Usually he'd take the opportunity to joke about how he has that effect on sims, but he just kinda snorted and said it was funny in the driest of tones. There was nothing funny about that half-hearted laugh and him standing in the foyer staring into the corner. Something was wrong.
"Earth to Dubstep. You coming in or you gonna stand in the foyer all night?"
"Huh? Oh, yeah, I'm good."
He definitely was not good because he didn't even flinch at the mention of the nickname he hates so much. Whatever's got him in a funk is probably why he's here. He always comes to me when he's in crisis. Well, when he perceives he's in crisis, rather. I love the guy, but he's a little high-strung sometimes. I'm glad he has sims in his life like Maia and me who are much calmer and more level-headed to keep him straight.
I didn't want to just dive in and spook him, though, so I started with a little small talk.
"Happy belated," I said.
"Thanks, man," he replied with a tiny grin.
"How did Tami like sharing her day with you?"
He let out a very long sigh, and I knew I had stepped unintentionally right into the middle of what I tried to dance around. I guess we're going all the way in.
"She didn't."
"Oh."
"How do you-" He stopped himself and turned away from me. "Nevermind. You wouldn't understand."
"Understand what?"
He swatted at me, trying to sweep the conversation back under the rug.
"Nothing. You have the perfect child and all this wisdom. You don't understand what it's like for the rest of us."
Was he mocking me? I've had it up to here with everyone assuming I live this perfect life and have all the answers. I'm one of the most down-to-earth sims I know, yet somehow I still end up being out of touch with everyone. Am I too confident? Too strong? I know I've carried things I shouldn't have in the past, and I need to be more open, but how does that equate to me having it all together? I know Dub is upset about something and isn't thinking straight, so I'm gonna try to let it go this time, but not before I give him a little dose of truth because, upset or not, this fairytale everyone thinks I live in ends today.
"Do you really believe that?" I asked.
He shrugged.
"Maybe. I don't know. But I'm sure you're gonna tell me how I'm wrong, so..."
"Damn right I am. You don't know my life like you think you do. And you definitely don't know what goes on in my head. 'All this wisdom?' I got it from all the shit and mental gymnastics I've been through. Now, I'll be the first to say my child is the best, but she has her moments too. And I've had my share of parenting and marriage fails, so don't tell me I don't know what it's like."
He sat silently for a few moments, taking in my reprove. Part of me thinks all he needed was to hear me say he's not alone, but another part thinks he still needs advice on something, so I got down to business.
"What happened, Dub? I don't like seeing you like this."
"I'm sorry. I don't know why I said that."
"Don't worry about it. What's going on?"
"You ever wonder if you're ruining Desi?"
His question caught me off guard, and I laughed. He has no idea how obvious that answer should be.
"Only all the time," I said.
His eyes lit up.
"Really?"
"Of course. Did Tami come with a manual? Because we sure didn't get one. I don't know what I'm doing half the time, man, so yeah...I wonder. Like, her birthday is in two days, but I'm still carrying her around like an infant. She enjoys it, so it's cool, but is it hurting her? Will she want to be up under us all the time when she's older? Am I keeping her from becoming independent? I question every move I make with her, even if it's not necessarily bad."
"I feel that." He sat there, nodding over and over as if to drum up the courage to make his next statement. "Tami has been doing and saying some mean things lately, but I just let it happen because of my own feelings about the sims she's doing it to."
"How do you mean?"
"I told you she kicked my former tenants. You know they deserved that. She also bit my father-in-law. I was so proud of her because someone needs to knock him down a few pegs. But she's older now and using words. She cut up this little girl in the park yesterday and told her she wasn't pretty."
"Seriously?"
"Yeah. But the other girl started it, so she had it coming too."
"I see what you mean now."
"So, what do you think about it?"
Oof. Why does he always put me in this position? I have a lot of feelings about this, but I'm sure none of them are what he wants to hear. But what kind of friend would I be if I said nothing? I'd feel terrible if Tami grew up to be a monster, knowing I had the opportunity to shed some light early on. It won't be comfortable, but I've got to at least try. Here goes nothing.
"I think ... You're my boy, and I'll always tell you the truth, so ... You're her dad, Dub. You should be the one telling her those things are wrong, not encouraging her bad behavior. I know you think all those folks got what they deserved, which is also problematic, but is that the message you want to send Tami? That she can do and say whatever she wants and get away with it because 'they deserved it?' I'm afraid of the path you're putting her on. What kind of a woman will she become if you let her continue on like this? Do you think of her future?"
"Of course I do! What kind of a-"
He paused, succumbing to the realization I was right, even though I wondered if I had gone too far.
"I'm sorry if I'm out of line," I said. "I wouldn't have said anything if I didn't care."
"No. You're right. You always are. I was just thinking about what my parents will say if they find out how she's been acting. There's no way in hell they would have let me get away with the stuff I let slide."
I can't imagine my parents letting us get away with that either, but I honestly don't know what they would have done. Me and Less never really got into trouble, and my parents were both so lenient. I guess I'll never know. Hopefully, I'll never have to talk to Desi about this.
"I'm glad you always keep it 100 with me," he continued. "That's why I trust you so much. Can't lie, though. That hurt, but I know I needed to hear it. Deep down, I knew, but I never saw it like that. I'll do better, though. Believe that."
"I believe it, man. We don't play about our daughters."
"We absolutely do not!"
Not that I don't love these deep conversations with my best friend, but that one got really heavy, and he clearly has a lot to mull over later, so I pulled out my phone and showed him our new home, hoping a lighter topic would do the trick.
#ISBI challenge#sims 4 story#sims 4 gameplay#adolting#adolting gen 3#banks collab#wade banks#luca winston murillo
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Ok millennials and parents of Gen Z, huddle time. What are we going to do about our Gen Z and (preemptively) Gen Alpha kids' politics? Especially those of us who are parents to Gen Z men? We've all seen the data showing that millennials aren't getting more conservative as we age. To give them credit where credit is due, Boomers were the ONLY age group to shift left in the 2024 US election. Millennials didn't move much from 2020, but it was slightly to the right. Gen X and Gen Z moved significantly to the right—9 points and 13 points, respectively. Gen Z men shifted 15 points to the right, while Gen Z women shifted 9 points to the right.
Obviously the left as a whole has some work to do here, but I can't help thinking that some of the work might be done by us as parents or friends of Gen Zers and, preemptively, Gen Alphas. (Maybe part of the issue is that most Gen Zers have Gen Xer parents, and we know that Gen X is the other age group that shifted significantly to the right?) These kids are coming of voting age in a really fucking difficult world political moment, and it makes sense to me that they need guidance in this venue like they do in the rest of life.
Clearly parents don't have control over our kids' politics, but we also have a huge ability to influence and help educate them. Some spit-balling thoughts of things we need to be doing:
Talk as rationally as we can about economics and how economic policies affect us. Help them understand what politicians are saying about the economy, e.g. what is a tariff? what causes inflation? If we aren't clear about these things, let's include them in our research trying to figure it out. I can't help but think that most Trump voters simply do not understand what a tariff is and what it will mean for US consumers, if it's passed
Help them learn to play out different scenarios—to think through what will happen down the line if various proposed policies were enacted. That is, help them to think logically about not just what will happen immediately after a policy is passed, but what that would be likely to happen next, and next, and next. This ability to think down the line is so important in so many parts of life, and it's not necessarily something that comes easy to most of us.
On abortion: This wasn't a huge issue this election in the US. That said, I've had really good luck talking with my boys about why abortion is important, and this is a case where the framing of the issue is so important. "Parenting is hard. Don't we want all kids to have parents who actually wanted to be parents? Do you think that someone who doesn't want kids, or knows they can't afford kids, or knows they can't handle kids should be forced to give birth? What would that mean for their baby?"
Talk about it whenever political issues affect you. It's much easier to understand politics when it touches your family, but if we don't talk about it, they won't understand it. For example, I've got a lot of chronic health issues, so health insurance has been a big political concern of mine. I can explain that insurers not very long ago used to be able to deny people coverage if they had any preexisting condition, and that it's only democrats and the pressure of the political left that accomplished getting rid of that. And now we need to make sure we keep that win, because it's the right thing, but also because here is how it would affect us
Talk about all the rights we have that are actually quite new. Lawrence v. Texas (legalizing consensual sodomy) was only in 2003! Gay marriage has only been nationwide since 2015! Explain why gay marriage is important. Not because we believe marriage is some mystical thing, but because it confers legal benefits like the ability to visit your sick partner in the hospital, to be the next of kin, to get spousal health insurance, etc. It's so easy to think these rights have been around longer than they have.
If we're worried about vulnerable people under a Trump presidency, talk about our worries in as concrete a way as possible, because if we aren't concrete, they are tempted to think we're being hyperbolic. "I'm worried that trans folks won't be able to access medical care or their medication because Trump has talked about passing laws to do that. I know that access to gender-affirming care is vital because suicide rates are high among trans folks if they can't access care. When I listen to politicians talk about trans people, it makes me angry and sad because they're stoking fears but those fears aren't based in reality. Meanwhile trans people will actually be hurt by these policies right away." Or about mass deportations: "Trump has promised to deport immigrants, which is wrong—how does he think our country will survive? The people he's talking about deporting are an important part of our society. And aren't we all immigrants, if we're not indigenous? But it's even worse than that because he isn't only talking about deporting undocumented people. The policies he's promised to enact also plan to deport even people who are here legally with visas or temporary protected status, and he wants to use a law from 1798 called the Alien Enemies Act to justify it. That's the same law they used to justify horrifically holding Asian Americans in camps during WW2! I worry for these fellow people because it's inhumane and I also know it would be terrible for the economy, which seems like it would be against the right's purported goals, doesn't it?"
Any time you start a discussion like this, listen to what they have to say in response. Don't shut them down! It's tempting to shut them down especially if they say some nonsense—especially if it seems like nonsense they're parroting from right-wing youtubers. It's so tempting. If it triggers you, buy yourself a minute to cool down by asking them to say more or explain what they mean.
Help them learn to vet news and images, especially in this age of AI. We can talk through our own thought processes when we hear a fact or story. How do you know if something—a fact, an image, a video—is true? What kind of process should you be running EVERYTHING through? We need to help them develop this skill so they don't give up on even trying and become full of despair at living in a post-truth world.
What other ideas do you have? Please add on. I feel such a sense of responsibility over my white Gen Z boys, and I know I can't be the only one who thinks we need a fucking plan. No one has ever parented in this environment before—let's help each other.
#us politics#but actually also world politics#this is happening worldwide#but the content here is us specific#parenting#millennials#gen z voters#if gen z ends at 2012 i have two gen z boys but both were too young to vote this year#next time one will be old enough
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god i miss smoking shisha and drinking tea with a small group of idealistic young MSA and SJP students
#still mourn the connections i lost in college after coming out#anyway pls dont rblg this#idk why anyone would anyway but jic#this is not a part of my life that I've really talked about very much.#pulling back the curtain just a little bit.
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I know this is just a silly bad quality random screencap of a screencap that I found on facebook lol, BUT it's a succinct enough image to easily describe the concept in a quick/accessible way hopefully :
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(and of course, feel free to elaborate in tags, etc.! (especially elaborating about other senses as well.. can you "hear" in your mind just as well as you can "see"? taste? etc.) It's an interesting topic to me, as someone who's like a 4.5 at MOST lol. I'm curious what option will be the most common :0c )
#tumblr polls#hrmm... a little poll perhaps.. about a subject I find interesting.. since this image came across my facebook today#still really not feeling that well. no longer shaking violently and such but I still feel weird and weak much more than usual#They did say my markers for like infection or inflammation were elevated but that they werent sure of the cause so hopefully#it's nothing too serious. they did also say a lot of different things can cause that thing to be higher than normal but didn't go into spec#fics of what. maybe some of them are relatively benign or something. I still havent felt much back to normal since#I got really sick that one time though. I feel fine on and off but then little bouts of feeling weird and sick happen. hrmmm#ANYWAY.. looking for small ways to be productive. such as little doodles on evil ipad or editing game videos#or posting polls or cat pictures or some other like not very labor intensive things#I WISH I COULD FOCUS on writing HHRGGhh... I need to finish my game.. it would be so freeing.. a project that's been looming#over my head for like 5 years even though througouht that 5yrs I've probably spent a total of 3 months working on it lo.. ANYWAY#I still partially really cannot beleive that people CAN see stuff in their heads. There's always part of me that's thinking like. well mayb#e everyone DOES see the same exact thing but we just describe/conceptualize it so differently that we think we're talking about#different things when we're really not. But I have been assured by people I've talked to about it that they can GENUINELY really see#stuff in their heads like as vivid as an actual picture in real life or something. And the other senses are neat too. Like for exmaple I#can hear in my head much better than I can see imagery. I still CANNOT hear vividly like as if I were listening to actual music out loud..#but I think it's developed more than my sight. AND interesting how this varies the creative process. a friend I was talking to on the phone#said they write by literally just watching stuff play before them like a movie. where my process is COMPLETELY different. AND that affects#the content/what details we focus on as well as our individual styles of writing have differences that can be traced back to that.. hrmm
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if i just told you i love you would this world change
#witch hat tag#orufrey#these kinda suck lol i feel like i cant draw right now *irritated sigh* BUT I FEEL EMOTIONS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#if you are gay go watch good omens season 2 right now. NO YOU DONT KNOW THO!!!!!!!!!#i know being this affected by good omens is probably cringe. I dont care any more. the last 1 minute of good omens season 2 was#some of the most affecting acting i've ever seen in my life. sometimes someone acts with the force as if their entire career led to that#like during the credits part the very end im not even talking about before that. holy god#aziraphale i know everything about you. i know what you are feeling right now. i can see everything on your face. we're going to make it#ER.... NOT THAT THIS HAS ANYTHING TO DO WITH THIS POST. IT'S NOT SPOILERS !!!!!!!!!!!!!#I JUST FEEL THOROUGHLY CHANGED !!!!!!!!!!! SHIT GETS REAL FROM NOW ON.. LIKE IN GENERAL! IN MY LIFE!#tormented gay love tormented gay love TORMENTED GAY LOVE TORMENTED GAY LOVE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#btw the first 3 images were drawn earlier with an entirely different feeling and an entirely different mood.#Why do you keep pulling away from me?#It is because i love you that i do this#the lyrics from one of my japanese orufrey songs (A SONG THAT THE CREATOR LISTENS TO!!!!) led to feelings#“あなたが知らない私を残さず見ててほしいの” but i'm not translating it cause it just sounds weird. if with his eyes oru's asking “WHY don't you want#to let me in? to see all of you?“ those lyrics are like ”I actually want you to see every last bit of the parts of me you don't know“#oru you have no idea how much i want to lay bare my whole soul for you#maybe it's an alternate version of chapter 40. to me#i need to draw something really fucking good or i'm not going to forgive myself. i will not rest in this life#until i have made the orufrey that fully satisfies me nor until i have seen what the manga is leading to#NO STORY MEANS ANYTHING WITHOUT TORMENTED GAY LOVE AT THE HEART OF IT. THATS THE HEART OF THIS WORLD!!!!!#........... so Hi im normal :) haha *goes and finally makes breakfast*
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actually i'm still thinking about the moral orel finale.
he has a cross on his wall. do you know how much i think about that bc it's a lot.
a lot of stories ((auto)biographical or fictional) centering escape from abusive/fundamentalist christianity result in the lead characters leaving behind christianity entirely. and that makes complete sense! people often grow disillusioned with the associated systems and beliefs, and when it was something used to hurt them or something so inseparable from their abuse that they can't engage with it without hurting, it makes total sense that they would disengage entirely. and sometimes they just figure out that they don't really believe in god/a christian god/etc. a healthy deconstruction process can sometimes look like becoming an atheist or converting to another religion. it's all case by case. (note: i'm sure this happens with other religions as well, i'm just most familiar with christian versions of this phenomenon).
but in orel's case, his faith was one of the few things that actually brought him comfort and joy. he loved god, y'know? genuinely. and he felt loved by god and supported by him when he had no one else. and the abuses he faced were in how the people in his life twisted religion to control others, to run away from themselves, to shield them from others, etc. and often, orel's conflicts with how they acted out christianity come as a direct result of his purer understanding of god/jesus/whatever ("aren't we supposed to be like this/do that?" met with an adult's excuse for their own behavior or the fastest way they could think of to get orel to leave them alone (i.e. orel saying i thought we weren't supposed to lie? and clay saying uhhh it doesn't count if you're lying to yourself)). the little guy played catch with god instead of his dad, like.. his faith was real, and his love was real. and i think it's a good choice to have orel maintain something that was so important to him and such a grounding, comforting force in the midst of. All That Stuff Moralton Was Up To/Put Him Through. being all about jesus was not the problem, in orel's case.
and i know i'm mostly assuming that orel ended up in a healthier, less rigid version of christianity, but i feel like that's something that was hinted at a lot through the series, that that's the direction he'd go. when he meditates during the prayer bee and accepts stephanie's different way to communicate, incorporating elements of buddhism into his faith; when he has his I AM A CHURCH breakdown (removing himself from the institution and realizing he can be like,, the center of his own faith? taking a more individualistic approach? but Truly Going Through It at the same time), his acceptance (...sometimes) of those who are different from him and condemned by the adults of moralton (stephanie (lesbian icon stephanie my beloved), christina (who's like. just a slightly different form of fundie protestant from him), dr chosenberg (the jewish doctor from otherton in holy visage)). his track record on this isn't perfect, but it gets better as orel starts maturing and picking up on what an absolute shitfest moralton is. it's all ways of questioning the things he's been taught, and it makes sense that it would lead to a bigger questioning as he puts those pieces together more. anyway i think part of his growth is weeding out all the lost commandments of his upbringing and focusing on what faith means to him, and what he thinks it should mean. how he wants to see the world and how he wants to treat people and what he thinks is okay and right, and looking to religion for guidance in that, not as like. a way to justify hurting those he's afraid or resentful of, as his role models did.
he's coming to his own conclusions rather than obediently, unquestioningly taking in what others say. but he's still listening to pick out the parts that make sense to him. (edit/note: and it's his compassion and his faith that are the primary motivations for this questioning and revisal process, both of individual cases and, eventually, the final boss that is christianity.) it makes perfect sense as the conclusion to his character arc and it fits the overall approach of the show far better. it's good is what i'm saying.
and i think it's important to show that kind of ending, because that's a pretty common and equally valid result of deconstruction. and i think it cements the show's treatment of christianity as something that's often (and maybe even easily) exploited, but not something inherently bad. something that can be very positive, even. guys he even has a dog he's not afraid of loving anymore. he's not afraid of loving anyone more than jesus and i don't think it's because he loves this dog less than bartholomew (though he was probably far more desperate for healthy affection and companionship when he was younger). i think it's because he figures god would want him to love that dog. he's choosing to believe that god would want him to love and to be happy and to be kind. he's not afraid of loving in the wrong way do you know how cool that is he's taking back control he's taking back something he loves from his abusers im so normal
#i had a really big fundie snark phase a year or two ago so that's part of like. this. but im still not used to actually talking about#religious stuff so if it reads kinda awkwardly uhh forgive me orz idk#maybe it sounds dumb but i like that the message isn't 'religion is evil'. it easily could have been. but i think the show's points about#how fundie wasp culture in particular treats christianity and itself and others would be less poignant if they were like. and jesus sucks#btw >:] like. this feels more nuanced to me. i guess there's probably a way to maintain that nuance with an ultimately anti-christian#piece of media but i think it'd be like. wayy harder and it's difficult for me to imagine that bc i think a lot of it would bleed out into#the tone. + why focus on only These christians when They're All also bad? so you'd get jokes about them in general#and i think that's kinda less funny than orel and doughy screaming and running from catholics lsdkjfldksj#i think the specificity makes it more unique and compelling as comedy and as commentary. but that's just me#like moralton represents a very particular kind of christian community (namely a middle class fundie wasp nest)#you're not gonna be able to get in the weeds as much if you're laughing at/criticizing all christians. but they accomplish it so thoroughly#and WELL in morel and i think that's because it chose a smaller target it can get to dissect more intimately. anyway#moral orel#orel puppington#(OH also when i say wasp here i mean WASP the acronym. as in white anglo-saxon protestsant. in case the term's new to anyone <3)#maybe it's also relevant to say that i'm kindaaaaaaaa loosely vaguely nonspecifically christian. so there's my bias revealed#i was never raised like orel but i like to think i get some of what's going on in there y'know. in that big autistic head of his#but it's not like i can't handle anti-christian/anti-religious media/takes. i'm a big boy and also i v much get why it's out there yknow#christianity in specific has a lot of blood on its hands from its own members and from outsiders and people have a right to hate it for tha#but religion in all its forms can be positive and i appreciate the nuance. like i've said around 20 times. yeah :) <3#(<- fighting for my life to explain things even though my one job is to be the explainer)
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the persona 3 protagonist 25th anniversary nui in food appliances!
#lizzy speaks#persona 3#minato arisato#makoto yuki#guys friendly reminder that this is what adulthood is about dont listen to anyone who calls you cringe#hence why im putting these in the main tags. i mean they're not incorrect for what the photos are about. lmao#anyway this was a very fun birthday!!! i feel very loved and supported by so many people and i got to do very fun things (like this)...#i think... birthday is like thanksgiving to me. in the gratitude respect.#a reminder of all the lovely people that i have gotten a chance to meet and how i've learned from them#it makes me very happy to have been born... i think every day is a great day to celebrate life's grandeur + brilliance + magnificence#it's just a very poignant and strong feeling that i have that i'm happy to have met so many wonderful people#and while there are some people i've only known for brief periods of time or people who i havent really been good at keeping in contact wit#i do cherish it! im so grateful. so happy that there are people who cheer my silly shenanigans on#while there are ways in which aging makes me go “oh hmm” i think overall i'm happy that i get to keep on living and learning#i have so much fondness for humanity and people... like even if i dont get to talk to ppl directly i just get very emotional yknow#like wow.. you exist.. thats so fucking awesome... i hope you have an awesome day... im glad our paths could cross#if you have read up to this point of my tags.. thank you for reading and being part of my life#i will keep on being the silliest guy ive ever known! cheers to more shenyanigans and self-discovery :3
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i love not knowing if i'll ever be healthy again i love all of the time i've used to move my body become nothing i love spending my adulthood wasting away year after year for various reasons baby!
#i know i'm being dramatic and privileged etc etc right now but i hate living like this#i probably had covid in the beginning of august and since then my heart and lungs have just been fucked#so now i'm probably looking at at least 2 years of long covid and maybe permanent neurological damage#could i be lucky and get better in few more months? maybe. do i believe that will happen? no. optimistically maybe next summer id be better#my symptoms are not that bad considering what i know other people have suffered but at the same time that makes it feel not real#otherwise i'm pretty much fine except i feel like fainting alot after standing up or excerting myself and anything beyond walking#spikes my hr to 160 and right now even laying down my hr is around 80. this comes with the associated shortness of breath etc#what fucks me up about this is that my normal hr is low with my rhr being under 50bpm and i'm physically active#so basically i've went from regular running and half marathons being no issue to not being able to jog 1km at the slowest pace possible#without spiking my hr to zone 4#so now with the recovery time of this being however long if properly ever i'll have to basically start all over again with everything#i biked to the grocery store yesterday and that took me out for the rest of the day because my heart rate just didn't go down afterwards#outwards i look fine and i wouldn't be as affected if sports and moving wasn't a part of my life and relationships but it is#i've read studies about recovery times and a lot of them don't feel applicable because the test groups are either very different from me#based on the baseline health info such as activity levels or they're elite atheletes which i am not#some have given me hope that keeping my hr under like 130 by doing activities like walking until maybe someday things get better works#but who knows and even if it does this will be yet another thing that takes the littlest bits of muscle tissue i have on me away once again#because besides deconditioning muscle loss is yet another symptom. so i will be even weaker than i am right now#i don't know how much of what i'm experiencing in terms of mental effects is from anxiety over my physical health and how much is brainfog#but we'll see i'll just have to start walking a lot every day and keep up with simple and slow strenght training so i'll want to die less#i don't think my family will ever properly understand because almost all of them are athletes and the one who isn't never does any excercis#so either i just look like i'm weak but i was always weak so it's not a big deal or my experience isn't really that important#this is so so so pathetic both my reaction and the issue but it's difficult to not feel this way especially with the uncertainty#shit talking
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when i was younger and hung out around my uncle a lot more than i do now, i remember whenever he referred to things regarding his native heritage, he always just called it "indian". called himself an indian, called the words he taught us indian, so on. since i was a little kid who didn't know any better, i didn't know that "indian" in the context of indigenous americans was a very broad, frankly bastardized term to paint a vast variety of cultures spanning two whole damn continents with one brush. it only occurred to me as i got much older than i was at the time that there'd be more than one "indian" language, and up until now since i had no idea what tribe(s) he even is i couldn't even begin to know where to look unless i found a download of every goddamn interlingual dictionary available and painstakingly checked every godddamn one for what their word for "thunder" is
the word he taught us meant thunder was hiloha. i didn't even know how to spell it until now, because he only ever said it aloud. literally just a few minutes ago, i decided to ask my grandma (his sister) if we knew what tribe(s) he belonged to. and apparently he's a mix of choctaw and makah. which gave me a lead, which led to me finding a dictionary on libgen, which led to me word searching "thunder" in the choctaw to english dictionary. it's the only word i remember him teaching us, and i'm unsure if he ever tried teaching us others. but it was his dogs name, and he was a damn good boy, so i remembered it clear as day. though, they normally shortened it to "hilo".
so, i guess what came out of this is that i now know a bit more about my uncle's heritage, and where to look for more research. so, if you're gonna have a takeaway from this, i'd appreciate it if you remembered the word "hiloha". it means thunder. and aside from being the name of a very good boy who deserves to be remembered, i think it's even more important to remember the histories, cultures, and of course the languages of all the indigenous folks who came before us and did their damndest to preserve their cultures in spite of it all.
#honestly a bit unsure if he was just simplifying it all down for us little idiot kids or not#regardless i think it's an important memory to keep alive#writing this up got me thinking about my time spent over at his place when i was real young. we spent a thanksgiving or two over there#both him and his wife were alcoholics at the time. she probably still is but she's been out of their lives for a while#i remember huddling in the corner with my cousin and my mom while they both fought. i distinctly remember her slapping him over the head#with a TV remote. not a very happy thanksgiving that one#it occurred to me while remembering this that there's definitely some kind of bitter irony to a white woman abusing a native man and his so#on thanksgiving. not even mentioning just a (mostly) native family having a bad thanksgiving in general. a bitter memory all around#god she was a cunt. talked shit about welfare queens and people on food stamps while me and my mom bought her food with our food stamps#claimed to be a vegetarian because how much she loved animals but still regularly ate bacon#i definitely don't remember my uncle being perfect in that relationship but i also definitely remember her being far worse#i'm almost certain it was mutual abuse but there's definitely a reason why my uncle's still in my cousin's life and mother isn't#aside from the fact that she did in fact abandon them and start a new family#as far as i know my uncle's recovered from his alcoholism and she hasn't. which itself wouldn't be a sin if she wasn't also naturally just#nasty piece of vaguely human looking garbage even without the alcohol#the way i understand it alcohol usually doesn't change who a person is at their core. it just amplifies who they already are#my grandpa's a very loving man and while i've never seen him get outright drunk i'm told he's very sweet and cuddly#saying this feels like a bit of a blanket statement but i definitely feel like for the most part if someone is an abusive piece of shit#while drunk they're also a lot more likely to be an abusive piece of shit sober#i've heard that some people are sweet and kind sober and turn nasty when drunk. i've never seen that firsthand but i'm sure it's entirely#possible. i can't speak whether it actually reveals who they really are or what. i'm not a psychologist#im rambling. oh well!#i'm glad that my cousin and uncle seem to be in a better place now. got their shit together#that's what matters
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