#this is not a live and let live situation fuck!!! fuck you!!!!!

[crowofmidnightsworld]

In your dreams | Caleb

Caleb x female reader Type: Smut, almost no plot Synopsis: You and Caleb had fallen asleep in your bed, watching movies. In the middle of the night you wake up by something, or rather someone, rubbing against you. Warnings: MDNI, needy/desperate m, cursing, possessive m, finishing inside, love confession

Word Count: 2.4k

He couldn't take it anymore. It had started off so innocently. You and Caleb decided to spend the night in, watching movies, since it had been raining all day and there had been nothing else to do.

It had been a fun night, especially because you had recently started to trust Caleb more again. You're slowly letting him back in, but sometimes it truly felt like you couldn't live with or without him. He made your mind go crazy, because he wasn't your brother anymore and you were starting to doubt if he ever really was, confused about your feelings for him.

And now you're lying in front of him. His arms wrapped around your middle and you had felt so safe, that you dozed off. Unlike Caleb. He has been awake the entire time and relished the feeling of you lying in his arms. Pressed against him as tight as humanly possible and his mind couldn't stop going into overdrive. He had realised years ago that he had never seen you as his sister. At first it had scared him, because the thoughts he had had about you were something no brother would ever dare to think of his sister.

When those thoughts first entered his mind, he tried to distance himself from you but as soon as he noticed how much that had hurt you, he stopped, even if it had been torture for himself. Over time he started to justify his thoughts. His cravings. And he realised that he hadn't seen you as his sister, even when he was a young boy. You were like sunlight that had to be protected, and that's what he did. Especially when he realised how many people wanted to hurt you. He was content with killing anyone who dared lay their hands on you or even look in your direction. You were his. His obsession. His sunlight.

For the hundredth time tonight the smell of your coconut shampoo enters Caleb's nose and he can't stop himself from burying his face in your hair again. He hates that he feels like this about you, his mind and his feelings contradicting in every possible way, but as long as you don't know about it, he's content with how things currently are. Until you start talking and moving in your sleep.

At first a chuckle bubbled out of Caleb, trying to be as quiet as possible to not wake you up, but your words start to become more clear. An incoherent string of words like "Yes", "Right there" and even quiet moans coming out of your mouth fill the room, and Caleb immediately goes rigid. He can't believe what he's hearing right now, not sure how to deal with this situation, but then you push your hips against his. And you say his name. His name.

Every colour in Caleb's face drains, his mind going a thousand miles an hour, when he notices that familiar feeling of his pants tightening around him. Fuck. His first thought is to pull away from you a little bit, but the second he moves even an inch away from you, he hears you whining in protest and he immediately stops. Caleb's heart is about to burst out of his chest, because that's what he had been imaginging almost every night. Every night he was alone at Skyhaven with his cock fucking into his fist, or even back when he was training to become a pilot.

Only a few seconds later he realises that he has starting grinding his hardness against you, needing to feel that friction. Needing to feel you. Does he feel bad about it? Yes. But you're making all these pretty sounds and you're saying his name, so he tries to justify his actions with that. He nuzzles his face into your shoulder, slowly moving one of his hands under your shirt. The need to feel your skin, to feel you overpowering his rational thoughts.

And that's when you start to wake up. At first you think you're still dreaming and you feel this pang of guilt. You always felt it when you had these dreams about Caleb, but they just wouldn't stop. Too afraid to deal with those feelings, you never really tried to think about what you truly felt for him. And you are so scared of losing Caleb, if he ever found out about this.

The grogginess of sleep slowly lifts from your brain and that's when you feel it. Strangely the feeling of someone grinding against you, touching you, doesn't leave and you're completely confused. Until you hear the shaky breaths of Caleb so close to your ear. Your face instantly feels like it's on fire, considering how good his movements make you feel. And you hate yourself for a second for wanting him to keep touching you. Feeling the need to let him know that you're awake, that you know what he's doing, you finally speak up. "Caleb?".

Caleb hears you but he's already too far gone. His grip on your stomach only tightens and his mind is at war. He should stop, he knows that, but then again, he has been waiting for this for so long. "Please...Please...Just this once, Pipsqueak". The sound of his whiny voice, begging you to let him continue, almost makes you dizzy and now your entire body feels like it's on fire. Caleb is still grinding against you and from that alone you just know he's packing. He just makes you feel good and you honestly don't want him to stop. That's why you gently grab his hand that has been under your shirt for a while now and you guide it up to your chest. That's your answer.

As soon as Caleb realises that you're allowing him to keep going, that you actually want this, he feels like his brain is about to explode. The soft and warm skin under his hand feels so right and he immediately notices the hard nipple, brushing against it. "Fuck, you really want this, huh?". Now his lips are brushing over your shoulder and the slight growl in his voice makes something deep inside you tighten. If he only knew for how long you've been cravingthis.

Caleb's lips feel so soft on your shoulder and you move your head a bit to the side, just to give him more room to play with, which he immediateyl takes advantage of. His lips trail over your shoulder to your neck and he gently starts to suck on that sweet spot, drawing more of those sweet sounds out of you. The sound of rain pattering against your bedroom window disappears, drowned out by your quiet gasps and by Caleb's erratic breathing.

Everything about this situation is overwhelming you, but you need even more. You need to feel him. That's why you grab his hand again, with which he's currently gently flicking his fingers against your hard nipple. "Don't make me stop... I can't...". He sounds even more desperate than before, biting into your shoulder to make you stop, as his hips start to grind against you even harder, but you have other plans. "I won't. I just need you to...". Not being able to finish your sentence, a small part of you still feeling like what you're doing with Caleb is wrong, you wordlessly guide Caleb's hand down to the hem of your shorts.

For a second Caleb stops everything. With a tight grip on the hem of your shorts, he's now just breathing against your neck and you can feel his heart hammering against your back. He won't stop. He knows that, but he also knows that once you two cross that line, it'll never be as it was. Your heart also feels like it's about to jump out of your chest, the mixture of anticipation and need making your own breath speed up. And that's when Caleb slowly pulls down your shorts. His fingers are grabbing your shorts and panties at the same time and suddenly you find yourself lying in your bed with Caleb behind you, completely bare. Never in a million years did you think inviting Caleb to a movie night would end up like this, but you're so glad that you did it.

Moving his hand away from you, you can hear Caleb pulling down his own pants and before you can even feel his cock anywhere near you, that intense feeling in your middle grows stronger. Before you can think about what you two are about to do, Caleb pushes his hard cock in between your thighs and he can only growl, when he feels how wet you are. How your slickness is already covering him and his hand quickly moves to your hip, holding on tight. "Tell me, Pipsqueak. What were you dreaming of?". That question alone makes your face heat up again, but at the same time only whiny sounds leave your lips. He feels so good against you, rubbing his tip against your pussy at such a fast pace, hitting your clit with it every time. How could you tell him that you had been dreaming of that one night a few years ago, when you two kissed. That you wished he would've done more that night?

"How long have you been dreaming of me like that? For how long have you wanted to be mine?". He just won't stop. Caleb had always loved teasing you but now is not the time for this. All you want is for him to take you. To finally still that hunger you've felt for him for years now. You simply start to grind against his hard cock, willing him to accidentally slip inside, but Caleb's hold on your hip just tightens. Holding you in place. Another whine escapes your lips, but Caleb doesn't chuckle. He is just as much of a needy mess as you are right now, but that doesn't stop him from teasing you. His breath feels hot against your ear, making a shiver go down your spine and it's the most infuriating yet delicious feeling you've ever felt.

"Because I've been wanting to do this for years.". Without any other warning, Caleb finally pushes the tip of his cock into you, not entering you completely yet. A loud groan rumbles through Caleb's chest and all you can do is throw your head back a little bit, moaning. He only has his tip in you and yet you already know that he's big. Just like you knew he would be from the beginning. After a few seconds of letting you adjust, Caleb continues pushing into you in the most agonizing, slow way, as his teeth sink into your shoulder again. Rolling back your eyes at that sensation, feeling Caleb inside you to the hilt, you take in a deep breath.

After a few seconds of letting you adjust and kissing your neck again, Caleb starts to move. His thrusts are slow at first and it feels so good. Way better than it has ever been in your dreams. "Imagine how many times I had to fuck myself in the past years because of you.". Caleb knows exactly what he's doing with his words and you know he's saying it now to get a reaction out of you. Despite not wanting to give in so easily, you start to clench around Caleb's cock, earning a haughty chuckle from him. He's filling you out completely, drawing more moans out of you but it's not enough for him. "You really had no idea how much I wanted to fuck you, make you mine, all these years...".

His thrusts become faster after this. In this moment Caleb can't be the sweet boy for you. He need you to know that you're his and only his. That you always have been his, even though you didn't know it. The sounds of your skin slapping against his, satisfy something primal in Caleb and he's just pistoning in and out of you. Your moaning and whining gets louder in response to that, since Caleb is also hitting that sweet spot over and over again. You definitely can't think straight anymore. All you know is that this is right. This is where you're supposed to be.

With how fast and rough Caleb is pounding you, you feel that familiar sensation of your impending orgasm, and from how Caleb is groaning and breathing against your ear, you know that he must be close too. "Caleb, please... Finish inside". For a second Caleb has to force himself to keep moving, even though his brain is short circuiting right now. He has been wanting to fill you up with his seed from the beginning, but he never would've thought that you'd allow it or even beg him to do this. Something snaps inside him and somehow he manages to pound into you even harder. His grip on your hip tightens even more, sure to leave marks on you, but you don't mind.

After a few more thrusts, you finally feel that tight knot deep inside you breaking, and you cum like you've never done before. Starting to see white spots in front of your eyes out of pure pleasure, you throw your head back even more, your eyes rolling back. Your entire body is shaking, as you scream out his name and your pussy starts to clench around Caleb's cock. And that's it for him. "Oh fuck, I love you.". Groaning out those words, Caleb spills his seed inside you and he repeats those three words over and over again. You can feel him twitching inside you, as he fills you up and you feel like you could come again, just because of his confession.

Ever so slowly Caleb's thrusts slow down until he isn't moving anymore, but he stays buried inside you. His sweat covered forehead rests against your shoulder and you're both trying to catch your breaths. You have never felt like this for someone before and you realise that you don't want to anyways. If you could you would stay here with Caleb forever. Never letting him go again. "Did you just say you love me?". Your question is exactly what Caleb expected but he doesn't mind. His breath is still heavy as he gently kisses your shoulder again. "Mhmm, I've loved you for years, Pipsqueak.".

[bitchy-craft]

PICK A CARD: 10 fun facts about your future spouse

Hello and welcome to this new reading! I will tell you 10 fun facts about your partner/future spouse. I hope you all enjoy it!

FREE READING: a subscription to my Patreon before February 7th, no matter the tier, will give you a free question of choice. I updated the overall look of my patreon so feel free to look!

Masterpost > Paid Readings > Subliminal Channel > PATREON Masterlist [NEW]

The extended version (10 more fun facts) of this reading can be found on my Patreon, the link of which is here

~pick a card~

Pile 1:

1. They would love to draw you as their muse;

2. They enjoy shows that have incredibly dangerous and insane stunts (because why would you want to do that);

3. They can be very catty when it comes to their words if they’re annoyed; giving shade like a high-schooler;

4. They love their alcohol, but it has to be a specific kind;

5. They enjoy beautiful gardens and would love to have one to tend to themselves (but they aren’t good at it at all, you’ll probably be helping in the future);

6. Your future spouse loves thinking back to their high-school times with old friends, re-experiencing all of it;

7. Your future spouse is open to learning from mistakes and growing from past experiences;

8. Your future spouse would love to sleep in the forest with you sometimes; just you two, or your little family if you two have kids, in the forest with some fire and marshmallows on sticks;

9. They think a fun date in the future for the two of you would be picking fruits from trees;

10. They love acting as a joke; they have a whole alter-ego.

Pile 2:

1. Your future spouse enjoys driving cars a lot; they love the feeling it gives them;

2. They have a very small friend group (around 2 friends), but they’re so close they’re basically siblings;

3. Your future spouse has a tendency to let things go their way and just see what happens, even if preparing would’ve been a better idea;

4. Your future spouse will constantly giggle if they’re drunk;

5. They really enjoy cats, and most of guys their future spouse’s have had a cat when they were younger;

6. They find celebrating birthdays difficult and will act a bit ‘against’ it, but secretly they do enjoy it;

7. Your future spouse is good at imagining things (they prefer to imagine fantasy scenario’s);

8. Your future spouse loves being with friends and having a fun drink;

9. They will be causing mayhem to get a reaction out of you simply because they are bored;

10. They have a decent amount of influence on people; but they only really use it to fuck around and have fun.

Pile 3:

1. Your future spouse can enjoy a good book every once in a while;

2. They enjoy stargazing through windows something (they don’t prefer the outside often, given they get cold very quickly and dislike a ton of layers in order to do so);

3. They like circuses;

4. Your future spouse sometimes has nightmares, they’ve had this their whole lives. They have more then usual, and enough to be an issue in their lives;

5. Even though your future spouse will claim they’re not superstitious at all, they will always make a wish at a falling star;

6. Your future spouse loves to think about moral problems;

7. They would enjoy it to have a fish as a pet;

8. They’d like to sit in a dark forest alone and not do anything; they see the situation as something very peaceful and nice;

9. Your future spouse is very detail-oriented;

10. Your future spouse is often at the back near a wall at bigger gatherings, preferring to see everything instead of standing in the middle of it all.

[voxslays]

hear me out on Inho fucking us in a stall during night time🌚

IS IT CASUAL, NOW? — HWANG IN-HO

Pairings: In-ho x wife!reader Warnings: Smut, quickies, AFAB!reader, bathroom sex, light angst

It wasn’t easy keeping up a facade. Even more so, when your husband was the frontman and hiding amongst the players. Yet, you did your best to pretend you didn’t even know the man during the games—but it was just too hard.

Tonight, you couldn’t handle being near such a large group of people and had decided to hide in the bathroom, staring at your tear stained cheeks through the now cracked mirror, as you hear distant footsteps. Maybe it was your beloved husband, you thought—but it was probably just wishful thinking.

You lean down to the sink, throwing cold water onto your face. You didn’t have the luxury skin-care products like you did back before you joined the players. And how you hated it. Yet, when you looked back up from the mirror, you saw a very familiar face. His hair is now messy (unlike his usual slicked back style) but you would always recognize your husband, your In-ho.

In-ho slowly approaches you, his eyes locked onto yours in the mirror. He reaches out and gently wipes the tears from your face with his thumb, his touch sending shivers down your spine. He says nothing, just stands there, studying your reflection in the mirror.

“I want to go home.” You cry into his embrace. “I hate pretending like I don’t know who you are.” You sob, nearly choking on your own tears. His arms wrap tightly around you, one hand cupping your face tenderly, while the other strokes your hair gently. For a brief moment, all the ruthlessness of the frontman disappears, leaving only the man who loves you. His lips press against your damp hair "I know."

“Please.” You beg, as you feel his hand gently slide up and down your waist. For the first time since becoming the frontman, he feels his composure crumble. Seeing you so broken makes his hearts ache - the cold heart he's cultivated for this game, and the loving heart that beats only for you. His hand moves to hold your chin, tilting your face upwards. “Let me show you how much I love you.”

You immediately feel In-ho pull down the green track sweats you were required to wear, feeling the heat rise. He slowly removes his own mask, revealing his handsome face, before capturing your lips in a searing kiss. His hands roam over your body possessively, as if trying to memorize every curve. He breaks the kiss only to whisper huskily "Mine."

Just then, your husband pushes you into one of the bathroom stalls and locks the door, before pulling down his pants and boxers and ramming his length into you. He pounds into you relentlessly, his hips moving with a desperate urgency. Each thrust is a silent apology, a silent ‘I'm sorry’ for making you suffer. His hand reaches up to cover your mouth, muffling your cries and moans as he takes you hard and fast in the cramped stall.

You feel your eyes roll back in ecstasy. “It’s to much f’me.” You babble. In-ho growls softly as his thrusts become deeper, hitting that sweet spot inside you. He's not being gentle—he's releasing all his pent-up stress and aggression from running the games into this quick, dirty bathroom sex with his beloved wife. "Spread wider."

You can feel yourself quickly hitting your climax as you moan out your husbands name. “In-ho!” You scream. His pace quickens, driving into you one last time as he follows your climax with his own release, his body trembling against yours in the pastel colored stall.

He leans his forehead against yours, panting heavily "Yeobo…" The intimacy of this moment contrasting sharply with the harsh reality of your situation. “One more day, and I promise we can leave.” He whispers into your ear as he puts his forehead to yours. One more day, huh? You could live with that.

[eitaababe]

Could I request a Jj x reader angst but with a happy ending ? Reader and Jj get into a fight and he says nasty things to her and they don’t speak for days until he sees her at a party where someone is flirting with her and they talk it out ?

TALK IT OUT.

jj maybank x kook! reader.

[ a/n ; this took entirely way too long for me to finish but lol hope you enjoy! ]

—

"JJ?" you called out softly, hearing the familiar onset of knocks at your bedroom window.

You could spot him through the glass– wearing a new bruise on his cheek. Sleepiness long forgotten, you jumped out of bed, quickly opening your window and ushering him in.

"Hey, Princess." He grinned the same toothy smile, as if his left cheek wasn't currently throbbing. Complying with your fussy movements, he sat at the edge of the bed, watching you rummage quietly around for a first aid kit.

You huffed, heading to your bathroom before coming back, the small bag in hand. "Jesus, what happened?" You muttered, more of a hypothetical question than anything else.

"You should see the other guy." He lightly jokes, avoiding the question altogether. It was like this every time– he'd show up, beaten and bruised, refusing to acknowledge the seriousness of the situation. And you knew it was coming from home, but JJ never let you catch onto more than that.

"JJ." You finally sighed out, tone stern.

"Y/n." He responded, grinning like a fool.

"I'm serious," you huffed. "You gotta tell me what's going on. This- this isn't healthy-"

"What, you want me to stop coming over here? I don't got anywhere else to go!" He scoffed, suddenly defensive.

"I want you to be honest with me!" You pleaded, still sitting at the edge of the bed, looking up as he paced throughout your room. "I know there's something going on at home, and I want to help, JJ-"

"You want me to be honest?" He breathed out, tongue poking at his cheek before he spoke up again. "Alright. Yeah, here's honesty- you live such a perfect life, princess. Nice house, nice family, living on figure 8. And you're what- hanging out with me? Some dirt bag from the cut? You wouldn't get what my life's like- alright? You can't understand."

"But I want to understand," you breathed out, standing and trying to meet his eyes. "If you'd just let me-"

"God, Y/n, I'm not some charity case! What, you gonna call CPS on me? Try and fix me? I'm already fucked up, I get that. But I don't need your fake pity. This- I don't know what you thought this was," he scoffs, each word digging further into your chest like a blade, "But this isn't a relationship, princess. It was just fun, okay? So stop tryin' to get all sappy-feely on me."

You recoiled at his words, going quiet. Your mind raced through all your times together, the pillow talks, late night rendezvous at the beach, or even the small and intimate moments where he'd come over, relying on you to patch him up and inevitably staying the night in your bed.

"Right," you agreed softly, missing the subtle regret on his face. "Sorry."

"Princess-"

"No, no, you're right," you shook your head, breathing out. "It's just casual. I shouldn't have overstepped," you cleared your throat, nodding towards the window. "You should go."

He went quiet, mouth opening and closing as if he tried to think of what to say in response. But he settled for a quick nod, crawling back out the window.

You don't reach out the next couple of days, ignoring JJ's attempts of trying to make small talk. But you'd caught yourself sulking in bed, deciding you needed to make a change. Sarah had coaxed you out of bed, deciding that a party with the kooks would be the best way to let loose.

You had your doubts, but she wouldn't take no for an answer.

So there you stood, next to the bonfire with a beer in hand. The night had been completely uneventful, until you were approached by some other party goer. You knew of the boy, his name has started with an E. Ethan? Evan? You racked your brain, plastering on a polite smile as he greeted you.

"Hey, Y/n," he grinned, nodding your way. "Having fun?"

"Hey, E..." you trailed off, a shy, slightly bashful smile on your face.

"Eden." He finished for you, chuckling. "Where's your bodyguard?"

You furrowed a brow, confused before it clicked. You and JJ always ended up at parties together, many aware of the unofficial official relationship you two had. It was another cruel reminder of his absence, but you pulled yourself out of it.

"Maybank? He's not- we're not really.."

"So you're available?" Eden grinned, his once boyish grin morphing into something that could only cause discomfort. You glanced around, hoping for an outlet out of the conversation.

"Okay, even if I was-" you scoffed, eyes widening when he took a step closer, the alcohol all consuming from his breath.

"Nah, cmon, let's go-"

"Hey, dickwad!"

You'd never been so happy to hear the familiar voice, turning and relaxing at the sight of his messy locks. JJ's arms were immediately on you, wrapping over your shoulder. "Tryin' to steal my girl?"

"Woah, she told me-"

"Get lost," JJ cut him off, grinning and waving him off with a gesture. Once he was out of sight, the blonde turned back to you, expression softening with concern. "You alright, baby? He didn't try anything, did-"

"I'm fine." You muttered, pulling back from his hold. You didn't meet his eye, your cold tone causing his shoulders to droop.

"Look, I'm sorry, okay?" He sighed, looking down at you. He paused, trying to collect his scattered thoughts. "I just- I've never really done anything more than hookups-"

"That's not an excuse-"

"Let me finish, woman," he huffed, pressing a finger over your lips to shut you up, suppressing a grin at the cute pout on your face. "I know it's not an excuse. But I got scared, and I didn't mean it, okay? It's just- you're perfect. You're from this great, rich, and nice family and I'm just- I'm just me. I'm broke, I have a dad who beats me, dirt poor-"

"You don't have to berate yourself so much, it's making me start to feel bad." You grumbled out, looking down at the space between you two.

"So you're sayin' it's working?" He grinned, lowering his head to meet your eyes. As the corners of your mouth quirked up, he pushed further. "Cmon, princess, y'know I'm sorry. Won't happen again."

You huffed at the promise, rolling your eyes. "Promise?"

"Scout's honor." JJ teased, eyes twinkling as he pressed a kiss to the corner of your mouth.

Any cold facade you'd put on melted at that, as you leaned in, head burying into his chest. "Asshole."

"I know." He laughed, playfully tickling your side. "And 'm sorry. Promise I'll talk with you about all that stuff."

"Good," you nodded, smiling softly up at him.

"Great," JJ added, grinning back. "Now can we please go back to the party so we can watch a drunk Kie yell about saving those damn turtles?"

[nameless-jamie]

Binged the PA reader x Jamie tartt and wondering how she dealt with him in the episode where Roy attached strings to each of them

Strings

Masterlist

Jamie Tartt x fem! PA reader

A/N: I love this idea! Let's see, I hope I did your vision justice.

TW: vulgar language

AFC Richmond’s training sessions had always been weird, but this? This was a new level.

Jamie stood in the middle of the pitch, hands on his hips, watching his teammates squirm uncomfortably. Every single one of them—him included—had a string tied around their, well, bits.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.”

Y/N stood a few meters away from the team beside Ted and Roy, arms crossed, staring at the absolute disaster unfolding before her.

That was the curse of being Jamie Tartt’s personal assistant. Sure, most of the job involved handling his schedule, making sure he showed up to meetings, and ensuring his expensive, ridiculous skincare routine didn’t run out of products he insisted were life-changing. But it also meant this. Standing on the pitch, watching him do unbelievably stupid things, and making sure he lived to see another day.

“Now, I know this looks a little unusual,” Ted was saying, “but in Japanese culture, they have a myth that all soulmates are connected by an invisible red string. And those strings are attached to each of their little fingers.”

Jamie looked confused and asked. "Ok, but why is it tied around our dicks then?"

"Yeah, well, you know, that was Roy's idea actually..." Ted grinned pointing at the latter, who looked rather pleased with himself.

Y/N, standing at Roy's side, tried very, very hard not to laugh.

And Jamie, of course, had the biggest smirk on his face.

“Gotta say, coach, this is a new one,” he said, grinning. “What’s next? Gonna tie us all together by our nipples?”

“I mean, that’s an idea,” Ted mused. “But I’d rather not give HR another reason to call me in for a chat.”

“You know, when I signed up for this job, I had a lot of expectations,” Y/N mused, arms crossed as she watched AFC Richmond’s finest prepare for what could only be described as The Dumbest Drill of All Time. “None of them involved making sure my boss didn’t snap his dick in half.” She said rather towards Jamie's general direction than to Ted.

Jamie shot her a grin. “Babe, if my dick’s ever gonna break, I’d at least want it to be in a more entertaining situation.”

She rolled her eyes, biting back a smile. “You wish I’d dignify that with a response.”

“Oh, I do.” He smirked.

Y/N shook her head, biting back a smile as she made a mental note of the flirting. “You know Ted, I'll add ‘involuntary group castration’ to the list of things I never thought I’d witness at work.”

The American just chuckled at that and explained the purpose of the drill further. Something about how constant movement requires constant concentration...

Jamie turned to her again, tilting his head. “Babe, don’t pretend you ain’t enjoyin’ this.”

“Oh, I am,” she admitted. “Mostly because I get to watch you suffer.”

He gasped dramatically, pressing a hand to his chest. “You’re evil. Thought you were supposed to take care of me?”

“Yeah, well, I draw the line at testicular rehabilitation.”

Ted clapped his hands. “Alright, fellas! The goal is simple—move together as a unit and most importantly, do not break the strings.”

“You break it,” Roy growled, “you suffer.”

The team collectively winced.

Jamie, however, just shot Y/N a wink. “Bet you’d be well devastated if somethin’ happened to my—”

“If you finish that sentence, I won't ever re-order the discontinued brand of hair gel you use, you know that you won't find it anywhere without me.”

Jamie barked out a laugh, but before he could push his luck further, the drill began.

It went badly immediately. As expected.

The moment they took their first synchronized step, Colin tripped over his own feet, yanking poor Sam in the process, which led to a horrifying chain reaction of agony.

“FUCK.”

“OH MY GOD.”

“I CAN’T FEEL MY BALLS.”

Then one team was suddenly attacking and pushing forward. Jeff, the defender whose bits are tied to Jamie's...well bits, started to abruptly run in the opposite direction with the ball.

"Jeff, wait. No No NO, NOOO Jeff. AAAAHHHH."

SNAP.

A sudden ripping sound was heard then Jamie Tartt screamed in agony. Even Y/N and Roy flinched at that.

Bumbercatch picked up the loose string that once was tied around Jamie from the ground in utter shock and winced.

Jamie nearly keeled over, grabbing Dani for support.

A chorus of pained groans rang out across the pitch. Players clutched their private parts in sympathy for their teammate, while Dani only whispered, “Football is life… but sometimes, football is pain…”

Y/N, still watching this spectacle, took a slow, deep breath—

And then lost it.

Laughter exploded out of her, completely uncontrollable. "Oh my god—Jamie—" she gasped, actually bending over as tears welled in her eyes. "That was tragic—"

Jamie, still hunched over in agony, shot her the most betrayed look she’d ever seen. "Oi, you're not supposed to laugh at the person who writes your paychecks!"

"I can't help it!" she wheezed, barely able to get the words out. "This is the funniest thing I’ve ever seen in my entire life and I've seen 'Hangover' about 200 times."

Ted, ever the optimist, walked towards Jamie and clapped him on the back. "Hang in there, sport. You’ll be fine, good story to tell your kids someday."

Jamie groaned dramatically, still not straightening up. "Dunno, coach, feels like I just lost all hope for future generations."

With that, Jamie pulled the hamstring on his pants to take a look at 'little Jamie'. He nodded toward Dani beside him, to confirm everything was intact.

"It’s okay, his penis is okay!” Dani declared cheerfully as if Jamie hadn’t just seen his entire life flash before his eyes.

Jamie glared at him, breathing heavily. “Dani, I swear on me life—”

Roy, completely unimpressed, scowled at him. "Get your head out of your ass, you’re fine, Tartt."

"Am I?!" Jamie cried. "Am I, Roy?!"

Roy didn’t dignify that with a response just shook his head with a pleased smile. One man's agony is another man's joy or whatever...

Y/N just sighed now, stepping forward and—against her better judgment—placed a hand on Jamie’s shoulder. “C’mon, drama queen, let’s get you some ice before you pass out from the tragedy of it all.”

Jamie, still crouched slightly, turned his big, pitiful puppy-dog eyes on her. “Now you’ll take care of me, yeah?”

She rolled her eyes, but her hand did move to the back of his neck, squeezing lightly. “It is in my job description to keep you in one piece.”

Jamie grinned, even through the pain. “Knew you loved me.”

She shoved him toward the medical bench.

“Shut up and sit down before I let you suffer.”

[hsnlv]

strawberry lemonade | s.jy

pairing: bestfriend!jake x reader

teaser: “have a pack?” you ask, cocking your eyebrow at him. jake is confused, utterly. a pack of what, exactly? but the question in his head is quickly answered by you. “cigarettes.”

warnings/others: suggestive!!!!, mentions of smoking and vaping (and the actual action of doing it too lol), smoker!jake agenda (?) somehow…

wc: 1.3k

a/n: pls enjoy this hello?? my chest feels so warm (not in a cute way) when i wrote lmfao!! comments are reblogs are highly appreciated! anyways, happy reading lovelies🎀 here’s my masterlist!

"this movie is shit," you groan, letting your head fall back against the leather couch in jake's living room.

you don't know what's worse-the absolute trainwreck of a film playing on the screen or the fact that you and jake's science project is an utter failure. either way, both are enough to drive you insane.

beside you, jake chuckles softly, the sound sending a flicker of irritation through your already sour mood.

“have a pack?” you ask, cocking your eyebrow at him. jake is confused, utterly. a pack of what, exactly? but the question in his head is quickly answered by you.

“cigarettes.” you reply with a well-no-duh tone, as if that’s the most obvious thing in the world to ask about. but jake’s confusion turns deeper when he heard you.

"you smoke?" he asks, head tilting just slightly.

oh, fuck. why is that hot?

everyone tilts their head when they're confused, but jake? it's different. there's something about the way his sharp features soften just a little, the way his glasses slide down his nose ever so slightly, the way his dark eyes fix on you with pure curiosity-it's almost infuriating how attractive he is.

you've always thought so. al-fucking-ways! the feelings you have for him-buried under layers of playful teasing and feigned indifference-have been there for as long as you can remember. and seeing him now, with that confused yet intrigued expression on his face, does nothing to help the situation.

"yeah, sometimes," you say, shrugging like it's nothing. "only when i really need it."

jake swallows, and you don't miss the way his throat bobs. his mind is running wild, you can tell. maybe it's the contrast of it-you, the one who always nags about health, casually revealing this habit. he doesnt take you as someone who particularly smokes.

he still remembers the night where you would clean the overall of his room before you slept on his bed because you said “boys are dirty and disgusting” but in reality, you did it because the thought of sleeping in the same bed as him freaked you out —or turned you on—and you just wanted something to somehow distract you from the pooling heat on your panties. spoiler not so spoiler alert: it failed!

he clears his throat, breaking the brief silence. "i don't have any."

he can feel his throat goes dry at the mental image of you puffing out the white puff from your mouth. oh oh, sim is in trouble!

his reply makes you sigh against the couch. and as if you hear the bell of the ice cream truck, you excitedly sit up from the couch, remembering that you always carry a disposable pod with you.

quickly, you dig into your bag, fingers brushing against the smooth plastic before you pull it out. a small, pale pink device. a guilty pleasure. something you keep just in case you need one. and that ‘just in case’ happens to be now.

you flick it on, settle back into the cushions, and take a slow, deliberate inhale. the sweetness of the flavour fills your mouth and lungs, smooth and almost intoxicating.

strawberry lemonade.

you hum in satisfaction, tilting your head back as you release the thick, milky cloud of vapor into the air. it feels good-too good.

but what feels even better is jake's reaction.

his eyes are darker now, hooded as they watch you. his breathing is slightly heavier, his lips parted just barely and his cheeks flushed. you can see the way his fingers twitch, like he wants to reach for you but is holding himself back.

you lift the pod, offering it to him. "want some?" and your voice clicks him back into reality. he replies with a soft ‘yeah, sure’.

maybe it’s the stupid nicotine that messes up with your brain or maybe you’re just purely stupid when you take another long drag, letting the vapor sit on your tongue as you crawl up to him.

slowly, you shift, climbing into his lap and straddling him with ease.

jake stiffens under you, his hands instinctively finding your waist, fingers digging in slightly as you settle against him. his breath is shaky as he mutters a soft yet whiny ‘shit’, his eyes wide, and when you lift a hand to tap gently at his cheek, signaling him to open his mouth, he obeys without question.

you lean in, closing the space between you both, lips hovering dangerously close to his as you part yours, exhaling the white cloud into his mouth, your lips almost touching his.

and fuck, that almost makes his heart bursts— so does his growing dick!

his lips wrap around the vapor, drawing it in, and fuck-he groans. it's quiet, barely there, but you hear it. feel it.

his grip on your waist tightens. his head falls back against the couch, his adam's apple bobbing as he exhales, savoring the feeling, the taste of the sweet strawberry lemonade, and the intensity of the moment.

and god, the sight of him like this-his chest rising and falling, his jaw clenched, his lips slightly swollen-sends a rush of heat straight between your legs.

he gently lifts his head up back again, cocking an eyebrow at you, his gaze calling you in.

and before he can speak, you do it again.

another hit, another lean in, another slow, intimate transfer of smoke.

but this time, jake doesn't let you pull away.

instead, his hands slide up your back, firm and sure as they press against you, keeping you close. and then-he kisses you.

it's slow at first, exploratory, lips brushing over yours in a teasing, featherlight way that makes you whimper before he deepens it.

his tongue traces the seam of your lips, tasting the sweet remnants of strawberry lemonade before slipping inside, tangling with yours.

it's intoxicating. dizzying. the way he kisses— deep and consuming, like he wants to devour you whole-makes your head spin.

they should make flavour that tastes as sweet and as good as him and named it “jake”. because hell, how can someone taste this good?!

his hands are everywhere. gripping your waist, sliding up your sides, brushing against your thighs. and yours are no better, fisting the collar of his shirt, pulling him closer, pressing yourself against him, needing more.

a quiet moan slips from your lips, and jake groans in response, his fingers digging into your hips as he pulls you down harder against him.

you can feel him. every bit of him.

the realization sends a shiver down your spine, and when you rock against him ever so slightly, he curses under his breath, hands tightening their hold on you.

"fuck," he murmurs against your lips, his voice breathless, needy.

his hands shift again, one sliding up to cup the back of your neck, the other pressing against your lower back, holding you firm against him as he kisses you deeper, harder.

it's too much. not enough.

your fingers thread into his hair, tugging slightly, and the groan he lets out is nothing short of sinful.

he's losing control.

and you love it.

but then-he pulls back, panting, his forehead resting against yours as he tries to catch his breath.

his eyes flicker open, dark and filled with something you can't quite place.

without a word, he moves.

slowly, effortlessly, he shifts, standing up and lifting you into his arms with ease.

you yelp softly, instinctively wrapping your arms around his neck, legs around his waist as he carries you.

"jake-"

"shh," he whispers, pressing a kiss to your temple. "just let me have you, please?”

his voice is soft, but there's a hint of desperation behind it. and how can you say no?

instead, you let him carry you, let him press gentle kisses to your skin as he walks, let yourself melt into his hold.

and when he finally reaches his room, gently placing you down onto his bed, his eyes filled with nothing but want and adoration-you know it’s going to be a long night.

© all rights reserved | hsnlv | 2025

[chilling-seavey]

The kids are gone for a night which finally allows you and George to open the locked drawer you guys have on his nightstand

I can't help it...I had to put a little twist on this hehe

Warnings: 18+, slight/brief nsfw descriptions (kissing, breast play, restraints) and implications of more

You knew exactly what path the night would take the moment that George's hands encircled your wrists and pinned them to the pillow on either side of your head. He licked up the small moan from your lips, tongue pushing insistently against yours until you could taste the remnants of your home-cooked dinner on his mouth. Your hands bunched into fists where he had you pinned, withering at the weight of him on top of you, trapping you to your shared bed in the silence of your marital home.

With kids, your adult time was often more cautious and hurried and used as a way to soothe an itch. But when you had grandparent sleepovers to thank and, the two of you had perfect opportunities to get a little more rowdy and creative. You thanked everything that you agreed to move back to George's native England to be closer to his family. Because now the kids could be kept out of the house for a night or two at a time, leaving you and your husband to reconnect properly.

And him pinning your wrists to the bed was only the first step of the night.

George moved his lips off yours and went for your neck, kissing and licking over your flushed skin and biting at your earlobe. The next day, the two of you would have to pick up your kids from his parents' so he knew better than to leave marks behind [in visible places]. You had already been stripped down to your underwear, both of you, and George moved down your body with hot, impatient breaths. He then took one of your nipples in his mouth, licking and sucking on it just to make your back arch slightly away from the mattress and your hooded eyes to flutter shut.

"Oh, fuck," you gasped to the ceiling.

His hands tightened around your wrists when you habitually tried to pull away. George moved to your other breast, giving it the same treatment for a few more seconds before he was pulling away with a wet pop. You accepted his few sloppy kisses to your lips before he was moving off you and off the bed entirely.

You bit back your smile, knowing what was coming, and you got yourself into a more comfortable position as you watched him walk across the room to your jewelry box in only his underwear. He lifted the lid and easily located the small silver key before turning back to you with a sly smile. You tried to meet his gaze but you couldn't help the fact that your attention was drawn to the obvious tenting at the front of his briefs, the fabric straining over his crotch.

No words had to be spoken as he walked back over to the bedside and crouched down beside the nightstand, key at the ready. He slid it into the keyhole in the top drawer and turned it and then pulled at the handle of the drawer. It didn't budge.

George frowned for a moment and wiggled the key and then pulled at the drawer again. Still very much locked.

"Fucking hell..." he grumbled under his breath.

You rolled onto your side at the edge of the bed to watch, "What's happening?"

"It's not," George grunted lightly as he fiddled with the key, "unlocking."

"What do you mean it's not unlocking? You've unlocked it a million times before," you frowned.

George sighed and dropped his hands to his thighs, key left in its hole, and he glanced up at you with a sarcastic, "Thanks, love, that insight really helps the situation here."

You reached out gave a strand of his hair a light tug in playful scolding for his sass. Then, you propped yourself up a little and grabbed the key yourself to try.

George sat back a little to let you try your hand at it, grumbling under his breath, "You know, our shoebox was perfectly fine."

"Until our nosy children got their sticky fingers on it and now I have to live with that mom-guilt for the rest of my life." you replied without missing a beat as you wiggled the key some more.

"I doubt she'll even remember it."

As you wiped the silver key on the bedsheets for good measure before sticking it back in the drawer, you offered dramatically in response, "Until she's in therapy in fifteen years and talking about how she has this subconscious trauma response whenever she sees us."

George groaned, dropping a hand to his lap, "Can we not talk about our toddler right now? I'm going soft."

You laughed softly.

Eventually, George ended up having to get one of your hairpins from the bathroom to quite literally pick the lock on your drawer of sex toys. Super sexy foreplay, really.

The moment the drawer was open, he was tossing the useless key and the hairpin on the surface of the nightstand with a huff of relief, "Oh fucking Jesus Christ, finally."

You couldn't help but laugh at how obviously agitated he had been over the drawer being stuck and, now, how dramatically relieved he was. As he rifled through it for what he was looking for, you draped yourself back in place on the bed and held your wrists together at the ready.

But, when he joined you, he held two pairs of cuffs in his hands and was already bending your legs up towards your chest like a man on a mission. You didn't object, watching with a flush of anticipation over your cheeks at the sight of him binding your ankles to your wrists.

"Hope you don't have a faulty key for these now too," you teased.

He shot you a pointed glare.

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[fullofwoe5321]

Have you really thought I wasn't coming here to shake my ass about Weyler huh?

I JUST CAN'T BELIEVE WE HAD WEYLER ON THE FIRST TEASER!! THE FIRST 2025 PROMO!!!! OMG! WE FUCKING WON!! I KNEW THEY HADN'T BEEN OVER! MY BABIES ARE BACK AND I COULDN'T BE HAPPIER!!

I swear I watched that teaser over 100 times.

Let's assess?

So he wasn't on the run as they wanted to convey. Or at least he was captured. FOR NOW the only thing we are sure: he is at willow hill.

Damn!!!I know it's wrong BUT HE IS GORGEOUS!!!!! HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE?

He is possibly in that position because he had visitors which hints how unpredictable and dangerous the Hyde is and how Tyler is still vulnerable . I really feel bad for him. I would become a full villain If I were mistreated that way too.

The turning point is that Wednesday will be in his life again and even though she looks scary and stoic, I don't think she will agree the way Tyler is being treated. She looks like she wasn't expecting to see him this way. She looks curious yet hesitant. Wednesday knows that Tyler wasn't guilty for everything. He was manipulated by Laurel Gates and she knows that. I wonder if she is gonna do something about his living conditions in there. Maybe I'm being too much optimistic.

Extra: her tie is out of place. It hints she's out of her comfort zone. She is uncomfortable.

His stare makes me feel a mix of emotion. I can't even describe properly. He looks exhausted, drained. Or maybe he just had a fit…It's also a possibility! I wonder if he is in the chains because he misbehaved…

But it's another frame. Now he is on his knees. You can see that the chains have extended like he's leaned forward, then he looks up. I wonder what he was looking down at- something she brought for him to look at? likely she tossed something forward for him to look at on the floor and he is in debelief that she's been asking him another favor in his situation.

I don't know guys! Everything is possible. This teaser was everything we needed and now we are more hyped as ever. I can see (FOR REAL) a Weyler potential here. They wanted to convey they still are connected and an important part of each other's plotline somehow.

THE SCARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What's your opinion? please let me know

[lillaydee]

Head Over Heels Part 12

Jackson!Joel / Reader

Special Guest Appearance by a Certain FBI Agent who may or may not look a lot like Joel.

You left the loneliness of your home and headed to Jackson with Joel and the teenage girl he was with, hoping your new life would be less lonely. You should've stayed alone.

WARNING:

Non-canon Compliant, Pining, Fluff and Angst, Hurt Joel (The Last of Us), Joel is Bad at Feelings (The Last of Us), Joel Needs a Hug (The Last of Us), Joel Lives (The Last of Us), Protective Joel (The Last of Us), Soft Joel (The Last of Us), Jealousy, Loneliness, Trauma.

MEGA WARNING: Descriptions of Attempted Sexual Assault.

@copperhalfcent @joelalorian @vickie5446 @peelieblue @nandan11 @liciafonseca @senoratess @denisanoemi @lovefreylove @heartpatch

SERIES MASTER LIST

Part 11

---

Benny went straight for Marcus, leaving you in Liv and Diana’s hands. He was conscious, apparently, but very confused. He kept trying to get back up, one of the townsfolk holding him down, telling him not to move, another pressing down on his wound. He kept asking people if you were okay. Saying your name over and over again. And then asking where Lily was. Where’s Elena Ben? Lily? Benny kept telling him not to talk, to keep his eyes on him. Maria coaxed you into giving her the knife, telling you that you were safe now, asking Liv and Diana to take you to the clinic, running ahead to open the doors.

The place was suddenly full of people again, men were carrying Marcus into the clinic, straight into the surgery room in the back, while Liv and Diana helped you onto the gurney in the treatment room. Julie, one of the ladies helping at the clinic asked them to take your top off. You found that you couldn’t lift your right hand without hurting, despite using it to stab Pete, and every single breath you took felt like fire in your sides.

The clinic in Jackson was staffed by exactly one doctor. There were four nurses, only two of them actual nurses by profession from before, the younger was only a student nurse when the world went to shit. The other two were just women who helped around in the clinic, cleaning and doing paperwork, who later got roped into learning basic medical stuff, cleaning the wounds, stitching them up, even setting dislocations. The three staffers got overwhelmed when raiders attacked the town years back, and they decided more people needed these basic knowledge just in case.  

Right now, those trained people were in the surgery room, helping the doctor fix your friend Marcus who was obviously in a much more serious situation than you were. Still, Julie looked a bit overwhelmed, your injuries looking a bit more serious than they’d originally thought. Liv, Diana and Maria were doing all they could to help, but the blood won’t stop pouring out of your nose, your head felt light, yet throbbing at the same time, your lungs were on fire and your stomach felt as if all your organs had shifted.

Even in your dazed mind you heard Ellie scream outside, begging them, whoever they may be, to let her in to see you. Andy, the other stand-in nurse came in, and Julie drew a deep breath of relief, telling her what was going on with you. They injected you with something, and all suddenly seemed a bit loopy. Julie strapped you on to the gurney with leather belts, making sure you couldn’t move, worried that you had broken some ribs. Andy inspected your nose, checking it properly without you fighting her, told you to take a deep breath, and snapped it back into place.

Even loopy, your screams reignited Ellie’s banging on the locked door. You could hear Benny telling her to calm down, to let people do their job, her telling him to fuck off.

You lost track of time as they cleaned you up, wiping the blood off your face, your neck, your chest, telling you that you needed to stay awake, you had a huge gash on your hairline, a bump on your forehead, and they were sure you had a concussion, so please, Elena, stay awake.

When they managed to stop the bleeding from your nose, they opened the door, and Ellie and Benny flew in. Benny took your hand in his, letting go when you groaned in pain, taking your wrist instead. Ellie took the other, both ever so careful not to hurt you in any way. Where’s Jake? Maria asked her. Cat and Dina, she said. What happened, Elena, Benny finally asked.

So you told them. You told them everything Pete did. Every single detail you remembered. The slamming of your face, the kicks to your torso, the punch, the slap, the choking. When you got to the bit where Pete unbuckled his belt, Benny had to walk away, placing his head on the wall of the treatment room, his shaking hands in his hair, clutching them so hard his knuckles went white, his breathing ragged and frustrated at the same time. You quickly skipped that part and told him about the stabbing. Diana took over from there.

Ellie was shaking with anger, asking Maria what was going to happen to Pete. Benny was unrecognizable to you. The cheery, kooky brother you knew and loved had a dark cloud over his face. You realized then that this was not the Benny who loved to tease you, this was the ex-delta force soldier who was angry someone had done this to his baby sister. His dark looks turned even darker when he saw Diana’s face, holding it in his hands, eyes searching for other injuries, yelling for someone to check on her, your friend telling him she’s okay, focus on you. He asked the nurses if you would be okay if he left for a while, and when the two ladies nodded, he gave you a long kiss on the temple, telling you he would be right back.

Maria followed him, asking him where he was going. He turned to her and told her to go back to you, he had business to take care of. Maria didn’t relent, standing in his way, so Benny literally picked her up and placed her aside, telling her what she didn’t know, won’t hurt her, and shut the door behind him.

Maria stood where she was, contemplating what Benny said, eyes on the four of you. Everyone, yourself included, averted your eyes, Diana fussing unnecessarily with your blanket. For the first time since the back alley, you saw the bruise on her cheek from Pete’s punch. You were horrified, trying to get up to look at it closer, but the restraints held you down.

And just like that, you started crying.

You felt so stupid. How could you let him overpower you like that? Why didn’t you fight harder? You should’ve stabbed him faster. Earlier. You should’ve waited for Diana or Hank to be free and not gone out to the back alone. You should’ve watched your surroundings.

You should have let him down gently, and not in the snobby, egotistical way you had. You should have.

You should have. You should have.

And now, because you didn’t, Diana was hurt.

And Marcus.

Marcus.

Your sobs were uncontrollable, your sides hurt, your chest hurt, your stomach hurt, but you sobbed anyway, regretting everything you didn’t do. But you couldn’t stop sobbing.

Andy went to the surgery room and came back, Lisa, one of the registered nurses came back with her. She checked your pupils and blood pressure, asking you this and that, told Andy to stay with you at all times, and to keep an eye on your vitals. She then went to get something, jabbed you with it, and then all was dark.

You were vaguely aware of what happened after that, going in and out of consciousness. The doctor examining you. You remembered mumbling something about Marcus, but no one answered you. You remembered being wheeled to another room, lifted and placed on a bed. You remembered Ellie yell-whispering she wasn’t going to leave you. You remembered waking up in a dimmed room, Ellie sleeping on the chair by your head. You remembered the curtains for the bed next to you being opened and closed. You tried to see, but your head was too heavy.

**********

When you finally woke the next morning, Ellie was still sitting in the chair next to yours, Benny on the floor, his back on the wall, his knees up to his chest. He quickly stood up when he realized you were awake, kissing you on the forehead before getting the doctor. Ellie squeezed your hand, telling you she was happy you woke up, her eyes red from crying, from lack of proper sleep.

The doctor examined you, telling you that you probably had a concussion, a broken nose, several cuts on your head, lips and inner cheeks, a couple of broken fingers and some major bruising all over your body, some bruised, possibly cracked ribs, but they were not broken as far as he could tell – there were no x-ray machines for him to be sure, so you needed to be careful for a few weeks.

“Marcus?”

The doctor looked at the curtain separating you from the next bed, “He pulled through, but he hasn’t woken up yet. He… uh… lost a lot of blood. We’re looking for donors.”

You lifted your head a little, wanting to get tested for donation, but Ellie gently pushed you back down.

“No, Elena, you shouldn’t be donating right now. You lost a lot of blood yourself. Rest. Eat. Recuperate. Doctor’s orders.”

Diana peeked her head at the door, smiling when she saw you were awake. She came in, her footsteps soft, not wanting to make any noise if possible. She greeted Benny with a kiss, Benny checking her bruise, frowning a little, kissing it better. She told him she’s fine, taking out containers from the basket she’s carrying, giving one to both Ellie and Benny, sitting next to you on your bed, helping you sit up a little, Ellie quickly propping your pillows up for you. You kept glancing at the curtain, wanting so badly to see Marcus.

“He’ll be okay, Elena,” Benny said, sitting at the end of your bed.

You looked at Diana’s bruised cheek, tracing it with your unbandaged fingers. Your head turned to the curtain again, taking a deep, painful breath as you did, guilt filling your heart, but you didn’t say anything.

“Here, eat something. You need to take your medication,” Diana coaxed, spooning some porridge from the container she brought.

Before you could even think to say or do anything, heavy footsteps came into the clinic, and before you could even turn your head towards the door, Joel and Will came storming in, Joel’s face turning from anxious to relief when he saw you awake and was somewhat in a sitting position but switched very quickly to anger when he saw the damage Pete had inflicted upon you. Ellie, Benny and Diana quickly got up, letting the two men to your bedside, Will immediately kissing you on the top of your head, hands on either side of your face, checking your cuts and bruises, his face dark with worry and anger.

“Where were you when this happened? You were supposed to look out for her!” he whisper shouted at Benny, who hung his head, guilt all over his face.

“Will,” Diana said, a hand on his shoulder. “She went maybe five steps out back, she’s done it every night, I was right there in the kitchen, and I heard nothing until Pete yelled.”

“Really, Will, it happened really quickly. Benny was right there in the hall. This was not his fault,” you said, placing your hand on his, wincing a little as your ribs hurt from lifting your hand.

Will looked at your bandaged fingers, the cuts on your face, the sling on your shoulder, his lips trembling from anger. He turned to look at Benny, his eyes clocking his younger brother’s battered hands.

“You gave it to him?”

Benny nodded, his eyes sharp on Will’s, and the older of your two brothers nodded, “Good,” he said. “They decided what to do with him yet?”

Benny shook his head. Just once.

There were a lot of clenched jaws around your bedside at that moment.

Joel shifted on his feet. Will kissed you one more time and told you they would be right outside, tilting his head at the others. Diana placed the container she brought on your bedside table, along with the basket she brought, telling Joel there’s tea in there too, you should eat before you take your meds. Joel nodded.

You saw Will stand at the end of the curtain, eyes on Marcus, his jaw clenching hard, before going back outside with long, steady strides.

**********

Joel didn’t speak for a long time. He sat on your bedside, hands on your face, examining your cuts and bruises, his breath stuttering, his lips trembling, his eyes wet.

“I shouldn’t have left last night,” he said, tears falling down his cheek.

“No, Joel, this is not your fault.”

“I knew he was going to do this. I should’ve stayed. Be with you. Protected you.” His eyes didn’t look into yours, busy looking closely at each cut, each bruise, each stitch.

“Joel, please look at me. I have something important to tell you.”

Took him a while, but he did.

“I used the knife you gave me to stab him,” you said, smiling as much as your busted lips would allow.

That drew a bit of a smile from him, “You did?”

You nodded. “See? You did protect me. You made the knife for me, gave it to me, made me carry it around, even trained me how to use it. Came in handy. Pretty sure I gave him a much needed liposuction,” you said, a crooked smile on your busted lips, trying to make light of the situation.

He huffed a small laugh, “That’s my girl,” he said, running his thumb along your lips, bending down to kiss right beside the cut, careful to not hurt you further. You placed your bandaged hand on his cheek, and he closed his eyes, gently nuzzling into your injured hand, happy that he could feel you do that again. He withdrew from you, taking the container Diana had left, spooning some of the porridge out and asked you to open up, coaxing you to eat something while it was still hot.

He waited until you got all drowsy from your medication again, stroking your hair as you fell back asleep, before kissing you gently on the lips. He went behind the curtain to see Marcus, his jaws clenching at the damage Pete had done in just one night, before going outside, asking Diana and Ellie to stay with you. Will and Benny stood up, following Joel’s determined strides out, heading towards the quarantine room.

**********

The townsfolk were queuing outside the clinic to get tested for blood donation. Marcus was a well-liked guy, you a well-loved woman, and everyone was shocked to hear what happened, all clamouring to do what they could to help. The crowd gave way as the three Miller men walked out, knowing where they were going, quietly cheering them on.

Tommy and Maria was in front of the quarantine room, Hank and some other guys with them, guarding the entrance. Some townsfolk were not too happy with Pete since they’d heard what happened, apparently. Also, a certain Miller may or may not have walked in and gave Pete something to think about in the dark of night.

Maria tried. Maria really tried to stop them from going in. She had let Benny go alone last night, even delayed the doctor’s visit to him after Marcus’s surgery, quietly wanting Pete to get what he deserved, but all three of them? She couldn’t, as the Mayor of the town, in good conscience, let them do that, surely?

The men didn’t even stop. Hank actually pulled her aside as she tried to reason with the men, the other men parting willingly, Tommy quietly telling Joel to be careful. Joel didn’t even need to look at Tommy to know what he meant.

Pete’s face turned chalk white when he realized who had walked in. If Benny’s solo visit last night taught him anything, it was that he wasn’t the tough guy he thought he was. And now, there were three very angry men standing in front of him. All Pete could do was scream for the men standing outside to help him. But as the youngest of the three Millers closed the door behind him, he only saw the disgusted looks the men supposedly guarding him outside was throwing his way before Joel threw the first punch.

When the three men left, Pete was barely conscious on the floor of the quarantine room. Very much alive, nary an added bruise on his face, or anywhere that wasn’t covered in his clothing. Heck, his stitched stomach wound wasn’t even bleeding. But apart from that, Pete was a broken man, literally. And later that day, as he reported the supposed abuse he had received while in captivity to the town council, no one on the council deemed it necessary for him to take his clothing off to see why he couldn’t move his arms or legs, or why it hurt for him to breathe.

The men had taken Tommy’s advice and were very, very careful indeed.

And no one, not even Hank and Maria, recalled seeing the three Miller men anywhere near the quarantine room. In fact, the townsfolk of Jackson swore they hadn’t seen the three men around at all, save for the doctor and his nurses, who testified the three had been by your and Marcus’s bedside all day.

**********

It’d been two whole days. Two whole days and two whole nights since the incident. And Marcus had yet to wake up. You hadn’t even seen him, despite him being right next to you, behind a thin curtain. If you were back in the days before the outbreak, you would have been discharged by now, pumped full of drugs and let go with a whopping bill and a paper bag full of medicine you probably had to pay for out of pocket. But you were in a post outbreak world, where medication was scarce, and the clinic was a repurposed house.

Sitting up fully was too painful still, and the doctor didn’t want you to spend time sitting on a chair when you needed to heal. So no, Elena, you couldn’t see him yet. If he was awake, that would be a different matter. You wouldn’t have to sit up to see him. And if he drew the curtain back, he didn’t trust you enough not to force your way to him in the first place. A couple more days, he said. Let your ribs heal a bit more. The fact that your brain felt like it was floating in a skull twice its size didn’t help either. You got way too lightheaded every time you tried to stand up. Not that you weren’t stubborn enough to try despite the pain.

But your guard dog wouldn’t let you.

Every time you woke up from your medicated sleep over these two days, Joel was there, hand holding yours, head next to your own, sleeping in the most uncomfortable position you could imagine. He spoon-fed you your food, held your head up so you could drink, wiped your body with a wet towel under your clothes, even walked you to the bathroom, positively growling at the doctor and nurses if they dared suggest he should go home and rest.

He had even taken to wiping his own body with the wet towels after he had cleaned you up when you complained that he reeked, telling Ellie to run home for a change of clothes for himself, refusing to leave you at all.

When asked what happened to his busted hand, he claimed you must be imagining things, Will and Benny said the same thing when you asked about theirs. You decided there and then it was better not to ask.

He almost bit Vanessa’s head off when she visited, barking at her to leave. You asked him to let her stay. You knew she tried to seduce Joel. You knew her husband did this to you, but you saw her guilt-riddled face and felt nothing but empathy for her. It must have been difficult for her to come here. It must have been difficult for her to leave her house at all. You couldn’t even imagine what she must be feeling.

He only conceded when you promised he didn’t have to leave the room. He stood at the end of your bed, arms crossed over his chest, a scowl so evident on his face, refusing to take one step further.

Vanessa sat on the chair next to your bed, head hung down.

“I’m so sorry, Elena. I didn’t think he would do something like that to you.”

“Did he beat you, Vanessa?”

“No, never,” she said, too quickly, you thought. “Maybe wrenched my arm too hard every now and again when he got impatient, but no, he never beat me.”

You didn’t say anything, you didn’t even know if you believed her, to be quite honest.

“They banished him,” she told you, as a single tear fell onto her lap. “A few men and your brothers took him out of Jackson this morning. I don’t know where. But I was told he would never come back.” She wiped her tears away, telling you she didn’t even get to say goodbye.

“I don’t even know if I wanted to, he treated me horribly. Humiliated me. He slept with every woman who would have him and flaunted it in my face. I know what you must think of me. Why couldn’t I just leave him? Plenty of other men in Jackson.” She wiped her tears off again. “But Elena, he was all I know. And before we got here, he was good to me. Kind to me. Protected me. There’s a reason I fell in love with him. But when we got here, it was like the old Pete disappeared. I don’t recognize him anymore. I…” her head hung down lower if it was possible, fingers playing with the hem of her jacket.

“I don’t even recognize myself anymore. The me I knew in back in the QZ, on the road, out there in the danger wouldn’t have put up with the humiliation he put me through. You should’ve seen me, Elena, I was tough. Bad ass. I didn’t take any bullshit from anyone, least of all men like him. And now…” her head hung impossibly lower. You couldn’t see her face at all anymore.

“Elena, I’m so sorry for what I did. I knew Joel only had eyes for you, but I pursued him anyway. I told people things, lied, exaggerated, about me and Joel, hoping Pete would be jealous, fight for me, and we could go back to the way we were, you know? Instead, he…” she broke down, her shoulders shaking.

You looked at Joel. His demeanour didn’t change at all. Not even a little bit. You were reminded of the Joel you met back in Boston, the one you travelled with, so different from the man he was just a few minutes ago, before Vanessa came in.

“Anyway,” Vanessa continued, as her sobs began to cease, “I came to apologize, and to say goodbye. I’m leaving. Ricky offered me a place at his farm. His children could use some help around there. I don’t think I can stay and face the people here anymore, face you, your brothers, Marcus, Joel… I can’t…” she wiped more tears off her face, standing up.

“Please forgive me, Elena, Joel. I won’t be bothering you two anymore. I wish the two of you the happiness that you deserve. Take care of each other,” she said, bending down a little to give you a careful hug, smiling at you as she straightened back up, walking away, stopping in front of Joel, whose expression softened a little bit, nodding at her. She smiled, took another look at you, and walked out.

**********

Day seven, and Marcus still hadn’t woken up. His vitals were stable, the doctor said. Without the proper equipment, there wasn’t much he could do to determine what was wrong. All you could do was wait and hope he would find his way back.

The first time you saw him two days ago, you broke down. He looked so pale, yet so at peace. Like he was sleeping, but not really. You were discharged this morning, yet you couldn’t bring yourself to leave his bedside, worried that someone would come knocking on your door to tell you he had…

You couldn’t even bring yourself to think of that word.

Oh, Marcus, please wake up. You couldn’t afford to lose his friendship right now.

You were feeling much better. Your cuts and bruises had healed, your fingers were still in a splint, but they were not bothering you as much. Your ribs were not broken after all, you could move your hand almost as you could before. You no longer needed pain medication daily. You just needed to come in every day for a check-up. But the doctor was satisfied enough with your progress to let you go home.

Your brothers came to bring you home, even if Joel was already doing that. He hadn’t left you at all. Ellie came daily, bringing you your favourite book and food, clothes for Joel, hanging out, just the three of you and Marcus, reading the Fellowship of the Ring out loud so Marcus could hear too, even though he once told you he hated reading that book when in school. Bad teacher, he said.

You went to kiss Marcus goodbye for the day, promising him you would be back to sit with him the next day. And that’s when you saw Benny carrying your pack. The pack you didn’t have with you throughout your stay at the clinic.

“What’s that?”

“Your pack, I went to your place and got some clothes for you to wear.”

“Why would you need to pack anything? I’m going home.”

Will cleared his throat, “No, you’re coming back with us,” he said, “You’ll be staying with us until you are fully healed.”

“Why?”

“Elena,” Joel said, his voice soft. “I have to get back on rotation, I can’t be with you at all times,” he told you.

“I know that, but why do I need to stay with them? I can go home. I can do stuff alone.”

“Elena,” Benny coaxed. “We just wanted to be sure you were okay. Please don’t fight us on this.”

“I am okay. I’m not some damsel in distress you need to keep an eye on.”

“Elena, you were attacked. Please give us this one peace of mind. We just needed you to be with one of us, let us keep an eye on you. Please.”

You knew they meant well, but you bristled at Will’s words.

“I do not need protecting! I do not need help! I took care of myself just fine for 21 years. I do not need you guys to protect me! I am not weak! Leave me alone!”

You wrenched your pack from Benny’s hand, wincing at the pain that was searing across your side, and walked out of the clinic, going as fast as you could to your own apartment.

When you finally got home, your sides burning from the weight of your pack, from walking too fast, from climbing the stairs, you laid down on your bed, ignoring Joel’s pleas for you to open the door.

He left after a few hours of trying. Ellie came by, telling you Joel sent her, bringing food for your dinner. She offered to stay, but you wouldn’t let her. You were fine. You glanced down to Joel, who was standing in the snow, hands in his pocket, looking up at you pleadingly. You shut the door after pushing Ellie out.

You were angry. How dare they thought you needed protecting? You were without them for years. You protected yourself fine.

You were fine.

But try as you might, you couldn’t sleep that night – the first night in a week that you had to sleep without medication. Every time you drifted off, you could see Pete above you, his hand around your throat, and you would be right back there again, unable to breathe, to scream.

You sat up on your bed, sweating profusely, your breaths heavy in the darkness.

Fuck. You couldn’t live like this.

There were some rustling and crackling going on outside your place. You could see some faint flickering going on through the curtain. You padded to the window to see. There was a single person tent set up a ways away from the staircase, an oil drum in front of it, fire burning merrily inside. A lone camping chair was next to it. You heard crunching footsteps approaching, a hooded figure carrying firewood coming into view, placing them gently next to the drum, as if trying to be as quiet as possible.

The figure turned and sat on the chair, taking a thermos out of their pocket, sipping from it, a book in the other hand. And then, he looked up to your window.

Will.  

He saw you. He knew you saw him. But he didn’t care. He raised his thermos at you, in fact, and started reading by the fire.

You wanted to yell at him to go away. But you couldn’t.

You couldn’t because you felt a lot safer with him there.

Fuck.  

As you laid in bed, Vanessa’s words kept playing in your mind.

“I don’t even recognize myself anymore. The me I knew in back in the QZ, on the road, out there in the danger wouldn’t have put up with the humiliation he put me through. You should’ve seen me, Elena, I was tough. Bad ass. I didn’t take any bullshit from anyone, least of all men like him. And now…”

Tears were pouring down your face.

Was that you now, too? Were you her? Had you gone soft? You couldn’t defend yourself from Pete. You used to be badass. Bill, of all people, trusted you to have his back. Fuck, you defended your little area, mainly just you and Bill, for twenty years. And on the road? You had Joel’s back. Ellie’s back.

And you fell to Pete?

And because you failed to take care of yourself, Marcus was now on a bed at the clinic, in a coma, all because he tried to save you from the mad man you couldn’t defend yourself from.

You were weak.

You’d gone soft.

You were a bad friend.

Marcus, please wake up. It’s my fault. Please don’t go. Please wake up.

---

Part 13

[shy-canadian-snowflake]

Not Sober Pt 2

“Hm. Morning baby.” Wade said softly, reaching out for Logan. Logan rolled over and faced the other, a frown on his face. It took a second for Wade to clue in. “Oh.”

“Oh? Oh is all you have to say? Wade, you got stoned last night.” Logan shook his head. “Your doctor told you- you know better. It can worsen your delusions.” 

“I’m not sorry.” The man stated, sitting up. Logan joined him and reached for his hand. Wade wanted to pull away but didn’t. Logan intertwined their fingers. 

“Talk Mouth. Explain to me so I can understand why the hell you’d put your mental health at risk. You’ve been doing so good.” Wade’s lips twitched up into a sad smile as he took Logan’s hand and pressed it into his cheek. He nuzzled into the warm palm and let out a long sigh. 

“I felt like I could control the chaos in my head. Sober me has been getting his fucking ass kicked. My brain is telling me I'm an awful human who only harms people, who only brings fucking suffering and sadness and despair. That there’s a ‘But’ when you say you are happy that I’m still alive.” 

“Darlin. I am happy you are here.” Wade shook his head slowly and pulled Logan’s hand into his lap. He pressed on different parts of his palm, massaging it out. 

“It still feels like there’s a ‘But’. But not really. But only when you are having a good day. But only when you are useful. It’s stupid.”

“It is fucking stupid because it’s not fucking true. I’ll love you bad day or good Bub.” Wake looked at him with a weak smile before going back to playing with his hand.

“Weed helps. I can see my own mental health in the maze that is my head. I can handle the world with all its fucking bullshit, I can understand the situation going on without feeling crippling panic. Everything is in neat tidy boxes that I can grab and organize and file everything away.” He gave a weak laugh, shaking his head. “ It might take me a few more minutes to do things or get the words out but I feel like a functional person who can work, who can do things. I feel like a normal person. I feel okay. I feel real.”

“You are real Wade.” 

“Yeah Well.” He turned Logan's hand over to trace the veins on the back of it. “I don’t fucking feel like it.”

There was a moment of silence as each man took a moment to collect their thoughts. Wade was the first to break the silence, like he always was.

“When I’m sober, I’m locked in a room of dark spaghetti and I can’t get out. I’m drowning in fear of what is going on in the world, the fact that we have a billionaire that’s getting a little too close to being a well known dictator with a horrible taste in mustaches. All of these noodles of despair and fear. Time does repeat and we don’t learn and the sun is going to blow up one day so is it even worth anything and I’m just so scared and I feel like I’ll never not be scared and- and Weed quiets all that. Weed brings me to the chaos I can control. I can consent too. My brain is making me think and feel things without my consent.”

“Okay.” Logan said slowly, throwing an arm around the other and pulling him close. Wade head butted him which he did so back, “What can I do to help?”

“Let me smoke weed without judgment.” 

“And what is your head saying to ya?” Wade hated that Logan always knew when he wasn’t all right. Sometimes it was great when he was questioning his own reality. Questioning if something is really there. It’s not so great when the voices in his ear are telling him things that make sense to him, but he knows won’t make sense to another living soul. It was like messages only for him to understand. Spoken in an old  language only he understood. 

“If I can break my ankle I’ll be in control of my chaos. My mind won’t control me today.” He sighed out, not bothering to fight. 

“That’s why you shouldn’t do weed, darlin. It’s telling you things that aren’t true.”

“They feel fucking true. Can I just die for a few hours and wake up with a better head?” 

“Al will be pissed if we got more blood and guts on this couch.” Wade flopped back onto the pull-out, sighing loudly. 

“I don’t want to fight Logan. I want my mind to be silent for one goddamn day.” There was a warble to his voice as he spoke. Logan laid down beside him, pulling him close- chest to back. He tucked his legs behind Wades, causing the man to curl up a bit more. His arm thrown over Wade’s chest made sure to keep his hand pressed into Wade’s heart, feeling the beating of it through the shirt he wore. 

“Do the meds. Do the meetings. Do what you got to. You will have a quiet day again Wade.”

“I doubt it.” 

“You will.” And Logan spoke with such certainty that Wade wanted to believe.

---

I'm having a real fucking hard time. My brain is saying to break my ankle. It makes sense too. If I do, the pain will override my brain and I won't have to be so fucking scared of everything. Future me- Don't smoke weed, it's not worth this fucking dark puddle.

[littlemissshifter]

ummm idk how to explain this without sounding like a total debbie downer but the rise of fascism in the world really makes me doubt shifting for some reason like. why am i even here in such a shit fuck ass reality. does that make sense 😭 like maybe it’s just the fact that these situations make me feel out of control and hopeless like wdym there’s shit like human trafficking and nazis and genocide what the fuck.

idk what to do anymore and it scares me. it feels like my affirming isn’t enough and shifting is fake or something and i’m just dissociating from reality or something to cope with events happening in my country. 😵‍💫

hi! This is really important to talk about and thank you for bringing it up.

A lot of people can feel hopeless and lost with what's going around the world as a whole. We need to realise that these things exist and they exist in every reality. Not particularly the topics mentioned above, but the good and the bad. If even one or the other did not exist, there is negative in too much positive (eg being self sacrificial in the name of being kind) and positive in too much negative (people realising things need to change and stepping up to be the change they want in society).

I'm not saying these things should exist no matter what. I'm saying is that the good and the bad will exist anyways. Because the universe is all about balance and one without the other is non-existent.

You cannot change the ways of the world. But, you can change the ways of your world. Your reality.

Even if we all exist on this earth right now, we live in different realities. You're not only existing in this reality but in many others. The thing is you're only aware of existing in this reality. You can change that anytime. It is common to worry about the world, of how things are and what you want to do to stop it. You can do that as it is also the part of your reality. The world you look at is your reality. Now, you did not create 'this' whole reality. It existed before you were aware of it. Collective human consciousness created it.

You were 'born' or exist in this reality because you were shaped by it's beliefs. You played a part in it too. You were unaware then.

But, now you're aware. You can choose anything and decide it in your world. It will become true as reality is you. The only way to help the world as a collective is to help ourselves rise and become more. Become what we are truly as humans which is more than any physical event that has happened or is or will be happening in the 3D. This does not mean to stop helping people. But we need to help ourselves too by rising above the conditioning of the 'matrix' and knowing what we're capable of.

Again I'll say, let whoever runs the world run it, you just have to run yours.

[cosmic-giraffe]

Tw: Csa, abduction, incest

My thoughts on "Bruise"

Holy fuck did that episode make me feel fucking ill. Props to Von for writing about such heavy subject matter with respect for the real life victims that live with trauma as a result of these issues.

Hayashi and Ojima should never have been in those situations. Being taken advantage of at such a young age from family friends and family members that should have been there to help and protect them, but instead used a child's innate trust to hurt and abuse them.

It's so deplorable. At least Hayashi managed to get her revenge on Takao (whether she intended to kill him or not), and has grown from her experiences and took her pain and made something good out of it.

But Ojima... I relate to his situation far more personally for all the wrong reasons.

I'm not going to spew my guts up and let everybody know about my own trauma revolving around csa and incest, but I will say that my sympathies do lie with him at a much deeper level than I ever thought they would. From being hurt by a family member (two, in my case), having the shame of being a victim ingrained in him by the perpetrator to remain quiet about the abuse for YEARS, just to be accused of being a liar as soon as he spoke up about it.

It all hit very close to home. Feeling undeserving of love, feeling like a prisoner inside your own body after somebody else violated it for their own selfish gain, it makes living in your own skin an agonising ordeal. Like you just want to tear it off and start new.

Ojima is so afraid of not being strong in the same way as Hayashi physically is. But it takes an awful lot of mental strength to talk about these things, much less persevere with the unresolved trauma lingering over you every single second of the fucking day.

I do appreciate Tetro for talking about these things with respect and maturity, but God if it doesn't leave a pit in your stomach.

[28confusedthoughts]

We don't get confirmation on john being physically abusive but it can be seen as implied imo. Not that he was regularly beating them, but when amy tells sam her mother "has a temper" and sam answers "my dad does too. You don't want to see him when he's drinking" and dean's visible fear whenever he messed up as a child could insinuate that he had a tendency to be physically violent when drunk or angry (scared). Throwing an empty beer bottle at their heads, slapping them hard across the face when they are 'out of line' or shoving them so that they stumble or fall back is not entirely beyond the realms of possibility imo.

What sam said in Nightmare "well, it could've gone a whole other way after mom. A little more tequila and a little less demon hunting and we would've had max's childhood. All things considered, we turned out ok" can mean that john wasn't at all physically abusive, but also that he was, just not nearly as bad as max's father.

For the record I don't think john had a tendency to physically abuse his kids. At most, it happened enough times that sam and dean would be on their toes, but not enough that they would live in constant fear. Close to the anniversary of mary's death, or when one of the boys fucked up so bad it almost cost them their lives etc could bring out the violence. In particularly emotional/stressful situations it is not an unreasonable assumption that john would turn to physical violence imo.

That said, it is really annoying when dean's abuse towards sam is overlooked or excused by saying "yeah but he learned it from john so he can't be held responsible". Or (to go a step further) is blamed on sam because he's physically bigger and stronger than dean so 'why does he let it happen? Why doesn't he hit back?' Which is ridiculous for obvious reasons. The lack of critical thinking of some parts of this fandom is very concerning...

also Also this interesting hc that is almost considered canon that john physically abused his kids when not only is that entirely unconfirmed, it's pretty much denied after the Max Miller episode where they both agree that John could've turned out physically abusive but didn't

pair that with the real depictions of physically violent abuse we do see on screen but that somehow doesn't make the bigger conversations..

is it just the wide real time belief that sibling abuse doesn't exist because it's hard to tell amid sibling rivalry or is it that john's establishment as an absent figure vs dean's establishment as a present figure affecting the conclusions the audience draws hm hm

[celenexox]

Just another Picture to Burn - Matt Sturniolo

summary: when your boyfriend matt cheats on you, but you couldn’t care less

warnings: breakup, swearing, minor violence

as matt walks into the house, you walk over to him and slap him across the face, chris and nick watching this unravel behind the two of you in shock

five minutes before this happened, you were called to the living room by your friends nick and chris

as you walk over to them coming out of matt’s room you hear chris say “y/n there’s something we have to show you”

nick and chris look worried, scared almost, you chuckle a little at the look of their worried faces, not knowing what’s about to come next

“what’s up guys? what’s up with the frowns?” you say, trying to lighten up the mood

as you walk over to them, chris hands you his phone, on it, a picture of your boyfriend matt, kissing another girl

you couldn’t believe your eyes, didn’t know how to react, what should you say?

“when was this?…” you say, barely above a whisper

“three days ago” nick answers softly

“okay, how do you know, maybe this was before we got together” you say to chris and nick, but honestly you’re just trying to convince yourself of that right now

you and matt have been dating for only three months, which is not that long, so that picture could have been taken before that, right?

“n- no y/n, this was three days ago, he was wearing that shirt three days ago, and that’s the day he went to that party without us” nick says

“he went to a party without us, without me? he doesn’t even enjoy parties” you say, trying to keep your composure

“okay so where is matt right now.” you demand to know, your whole demeanor has changed, you can’t let your friends think that you’re upset, that you’re weak, matt doesn’t deserve you like that for him

“he’s gonna be home any minute now, don’t tell him for now okay?” chris asks of you

“why not? i deserve to know more about what happened from him, not his brothers, he cheated on me! does that not seem insane to you??” you raise your voice at chris

suddenly, you’re interrupted by the door opening, matt walks in

you, nick, and chris are now all staring at him

you look at nick and chris before walking up to matt, sort of a warning

matt looks at you walk up to him quietly, confused at what’s happening

then suddenly you slap him across the face, creating a loud sound and a gasp from nick and chris

you’ve never laid a hand on matt before, and you didn’t think you would ever have to

“what the fuck? y/n, guys, what happened” matt says, still confused, his audacity and the fact that he hasn’t caught up yet surprising you

you walk away from matt, snatch chris’s phone out his hand and shove it in matt’s face with the picture still up

“this is what happens you bitch!” you say loudly, “how could you cheat on me! we’ve literally only been dating for three months you pig!”

matt’s face now red as a tomato, almost speechless and trying to gather up the right words to say in this situation “okay y/n i can explain”

“save it you bitch! i never want to see you again, im out, we’re done!” you say, and grab your things and head out

——————————————————————

it has now been two weeks since the two of you had broken up, and to be honest with yourself you weren’t that upset that he was out of your life, the only thing that really upset you was the fact that he wasted your time

and also ever since you and matt broke up, you haven’t spoken a single word to your friends nick and chris either, not because you’re mad at them, but because you’d be reminded of matt every time you’d see them, and you didn’t want that right now

suddenly you were bursted out of your thoughts with a knock on the door

you got up and opened the door, it was matt

you chuckle at the fact that he showed up here, no shame, no remorse for what happened between the two of you

“what the fuck are you doing here matt?” you say with a blank tone, you didn’t like the idea of matt being here at your house

“i messed up okay? and i miss you, i promise if you take me back i’ll never fuck up like this ever again” he says, all desperate sounding

you look him up and down a few times, “there’s no way you think that i think that little of myself, matt the pictures were everywhere, of you kissing another girl, that’s not me, while we were together”

“yeah i know but-“

you cut matt off

“let me finish, I’m never gonna make the same mistake again, you were just a waste of effort, i could have done so much more things with the time that i spent on you, now get the fuck out” you say and slam the door in his face

you knew that you never wanted to see him again, you realized that he loved himself and the thrill of a new girl more than he could ever just love you

you didn’t care what happened after this, you knew that he was just another picture to burn.

[mommyslittlebird]

Fairytale

Stepmom!Wanda x Reader

Request: i had a thought of where wanda / step mom wanda comforts reader after a bad day and a lot angst and fluff too

CW: Stepmom/Stepdaughter, themes of depression, spoilers for the Disney movie Tangled (??)

Word Count: 2k (whoops this was supposed to be a drabble. Whatever.)

A/N: Thank you for the request! This takes place when R was 18 before she left for school, so a prequel to the main story of Her Special Girl.

A/N: Fuck my original A/N here that said this one isn't good. This one is cute and I like it.

It was pouring when you finally got home from work. You walked into the house in your uniform, soaked from the rain.

You saw Wanda in the kitchen, fixing dinner. She’s a wonderful cook, but in your current state the food made your stomach turn. You felt nauseous. You hadn’t eaten all day at work, but you still couldn’t imagine eating anything.

Your dad was at the table reading a newspaper. He didn’t acknowledge you’d come home.

“Hey, little love!” Wanda chimed excitedly, but her face falls when her eyes meet yours. You looked terrible, eyes sunken in, dark with exhaustion. You couldn’t even bring yourself to give her a smile. “What’s wrong, sweetheart?”

You didn’t respond, trying to escape to the privacy of your bedroom before the emotions of the day spilled out of you. You dashed up the stairs.

Your dad set down his newspaper with a frustrated thud. He moved to get up and reprimand you for ignoring your stepmother, but Wanda stopped him.

“Vis, you just make sure my pasta doesn’t burn. I’ll take care of it.”

————

She found you in your room, curled up in the center of the bed. You were still wearing your wet and dirty work clothes, but you’d thrown on one of Wanda’s hoodie. It practically swallowed you with how big it was. The sight melted Wanda’s heart.

“Sweetheart?” She called into the room. You turned over in bed, hiding your face in the hoodie. She came to sit next to on the bed, rubbing gentle circles on the back you’d turned on her. She could feel then that you were crying. You were silent, but she could feel the erratic way you were breathing as your chest heaved. “What’s wrong, baby? It’s okay. Mama’s here. Mama’s got you honey. Just tell me what’s wrong.”

“I don’t know,” you cried weakly. “I don’t know what’s wrong. It’s just… everyday is like this. I just wake up with this feeling of despair, and then I go to work and everything is so loud and there’s too many smells and I have to pretend to be happy while I make everyone’s coffee, but I’m just so so tired. I feel like my mind and body are screaming and crying for someone to help me, but this is just my life and no one is coming to save me.”

Wanda pulled you into her lap, not caring that you were still soaking wet. She shushed your cries and rocked you back and forth, letting you ramble and sob into her arms. She tucked your wet hair under her chin, pulling you to her chest so you could feel the gentle beating of her heart. “Shhshsh, let it all out honey. You’re home now. Mama’s got you.”

“All I can do is escape to this white knight fairytale where things are different, and I have friends again, and I don’t have to go on like this. But I’m just being repeatedly ripped out of that fairytale and pulled back into this awful reality I have no choice but to live in. I’m a high school drop out, all my friends left me, I hate my job but I’m just going to hate any job that takes up so much of my time. I can pretend all I want that things are or will be different but this is real life and I’m miserable! I’m miserable and I’m going to be like this until I die!” You sobbed, breathlessly heaving into Wanda’s chest.

Wanda felt her heart shatter into a million pieces. She wished she could be your white knight, take you somewhere far away where you didn’t have to worry about all of the awful things happening in your life. She couldn’t imagine what your situation must feel like right now, hopelessly trying to claw your way out of a well you’re stuck at the bottom of. There were things she was working with you on. You were going to get your GED at the end of the year, but it was still going to be another year before you could even start applying to colleges. The road was going to be long, but she was confident you’d pull through.

That wasn’t what you needed right now, though. You didn’t need to hear her say that just maybe, in a whole two years, you might be able to get your life back on track. You needed something now. You needed something to get you through the night.

“How about this,” she proposed, holding your teary face in her hands. “You take a nice warm shower and get all nice and clean while I go downstairs and finish dinner for your dad and the boys. And then I’ll come back up here with some mac and cheese and some chicken nuggets and we have a special girls’ night?”

You sniffled hesitantly, unsure if you could handle it all: the shower, the food, the company. But in the end, you nodded. Your only other option was to sit in here, alone, withering away in your cold work uniform.

“That’s my sweet girl,” she cooed, pinching you lightly on the cheek. “I’ll pick out some pjs for you and get your water running. One step at a time, angel. I know it’s hard, but you can do this.” She gave your hand a reassuring squeeze, and walked off to start your shower.

It felt insurmountable, but you got up, washed yourself off in the shower, and dried off before putting on the pajamas Wanda set out for you. On top, there was a fresh one of her sweatshirts for you to wear. You threw it on, inhaling her sweet scent with your arms up to your nose. You made your way back into your bedroom.

Within five minutes of you getting back, Wanda came knocking on your door with some mac and cheese and microwave chicken nuggets. Your stomach turned at the sight of the food. Even your safest meal felt nauseating.

“I know you don’t wanna eat, love, but you’ve gotta try and eat at least a little bit for me, okay? We’ll start with two nuggets and half of the mac and cheese,” she says.

You nodded, reluctantly taking the plate and working on your mac and cheese.

“Now, I think it’s time for a movie and some cuddles, don’t you think?” Wanda asked, already setting up the pillows and blankets on the bed. “What would you like to watch?”

You shrugged, unable to think of anything helpful while fighting your stomach for cooperation. “You pick.”

Wanda gave you a soft smile of understanding. She understood the inability to make a decision, and she was more than happy to make one in your stead. She ended up putting Tangled on the small tv in your room.

She sat against your headboard, legs spread and tapped the space in between, welcoming you to sit. When you did, she threw your favorite blanket over your shoulders and set your favorite stuffed animal, Thomas, in your lap. You rested your chin on his head.

“Do you want me to braid your hair like Rapunzel’s?” She asked once you’d gotten to the hair brushing scene.

You buried your face into Thomas. “I-I didn’t wash it in the shower,” you admitted shamefully. It needed to be washed after being in the rain, but you were out of energy.

“That’s okay,” she assured without judgement, starting a French braid on your dirty, wet hair. “We’ll put some dry shampoo in it in the morning.” She braided your hair with you curled up between her legs, tying it off with a little pink ribbon.

“If I were Rapunzel, I’d let you climb up my hair,” you said when she finished, leaning back against her chest.

She wrapped her arms around your waist, giggling at your silly antidote and kissing the back of your head. “You would?”

You nodded against her shoulder. “Yeah. Not dad though.”

Wanda smiled and giggled again. “You just want your tower to be me and you? No one else?”

You shook your head. “Just me and mama, in our tower together.”

She huffed out a laugh. “Just you and mama in a tower, huh? I can definitely get behind that. What would we do in our tower all day?”

You shrugged. “You could braid my hair, and we could sings songs, read books together, paint the walls, snuggle in our bed. We could do whatever we wanted really.”

She smiled, noting that you had said ‘our bed’, implying your dream castle only had one bed for the two of you to share. “So they would be no one to stop me from doing this?” She turned your head with her hand and placed a gentle kiss to your lips.

You looked at her for just a moment before chasing her lips again. And again. And again.

She giggled. “Okay, honey. That’s enough.” She certainly didn’t mind the kisses, but she knew you’d spend the whole movie kissing her if she let you. And she still had plans.

You curled back up in her lap. Right. You were letting yourself get lost in fairytale again. You weren’t in a tower in the forest with no one else. You were in real life, with your father and step-brothers in the rooms surrounding you. Wanda wasn’t your handsome rogue, she was your stepmother. This wasn’t a quirky pairing between a theft and a princess. This was a disgustingly taboo relationship that would ostracize you from everyone in your life if they found out.

Wanda wrapped her arms back around you, pulling you close. “Hey, princess,” she said, kissing your temple. She sensed your discomfort and could immediately tell what you were thinking. She wanted to stay with you in this fairytale for just a little longer. It couldn’t be forever, of course, but you could play pretend, for now. “We don’t have to leave our tower just yet. We have until morning, just the two of us.”

“M-morning?” You asked. Wanda always had to leave early in the night. She had to go back her room so your dad wouldn’t get suspicious.

She stroked your hair, slicking back the frizzy hairs that escaped your braid. “I told your dad that you’re not feeling well and I was gonna stay in here tonight.” She pointed to the packed air mattress on the floor. She had no plans of sleeping on it, of course, but she needed to make the lie believable.

You looked at her with wide teary eyes, unable to believe she’d do such kind thing for you, even when the risk of it was so high. She just returned the look with a soft smile and redirected your attention to the movie.

The movie was nearing the end, specifically when they finally get to see the lanterns and light on of their own. Wanda leaned forward and kissed your neck, using her hand to direct your head up to the ceiling. She turned on the fairy lights that lined the ceiling. They’d been there since you were a teenager, but you never turned them on. Most days you forgot they were there. She turned them to a setting with a gentle twinkle.

You were so overcome with love, you flipped yourself around in her lap so you were straddling her legs and wrapping your arms loosely around her neck. You felt like your entire body was buzzing with electricity when she pulled you down by the back of your neck into a kiss. A real kiss this time, not just the pecks she was giving you earlier. You whimpered against her lips.

“Shh, angel,” she whispered against you, advising you to quiet down before she had to stop. You slipped your hands under the hem of her shirt, tugging on it in a silent request. “Sweetheart, we can’t…” she said sadly but firmly. There was no way she could fuck you while everyone else was still home, no matter how badly she wanted to.

“I know,” you assured. “I don’t want to. Just let me feel you. Please.”

She looked in your pleading eyes, now twinkling in the fairy lights. She sighed. She couldn’t deny you anything. She slipped the shirt off over her head, leaving her bare under you.

You smiled, lying down on top of her and rubbing your face against her soft exposed skin. She smiled down at you, affectionately wrapping her arms around you to rub your back.

“I love you, mama,” you said, nuzzling your face into her chest with the first genuine smile you’ve had all day.

“I love you too, baby,” she said, squeezing you into her and kissing the top of your head. She couldn’t fix everything for you, but, when you needed it most, she could give you your fairytale.

[bitethedevil]

A House of Hope (Modern!AU Raphael x Tav): Chapter 2

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Last Chapter

Fic summary: Tav lives at her mom's place after a tough break-up with her former boyfriend. Rent isn't cheap anywhere, but one day her mom finds her someone online who presents a tempting new living situation that won't break her bank account.

Tav moves into the Haven estate and becomes a part of Raphael's House of Hope project: a project that helps unfortunate souls to get back on their feet. Although, something is not quite right about the house and her fellow tenants. That's not to mention her odd landlord who seems to be hiding something...

AN: Raphael, our dear problematic landlord, is playing it safe in these first couple of chapters, but he will get so fucked up later on. For now we are setting the scene a bit more. NSFT stuff in the next chapter as Haarlep is properly introduced.

Tav yanked on the window to her bedroom. She pulled it closed but the handle would just not go down and let her keep it closed.

She had finally found something wrong with the apartment. She had been expecting toxic mold to hide somewhere behind the furniture, so she supposed that a broken window was really a minor fault.

She gave up on the stubborn window and instead felt the need to explore her new surroundings a little bit. She folded the map of the estate that Raphael had given her and put it in her back pocket.

When she opened the door to the shared entrance, she stepped out into a cloud of smoke. She blew it away and then looked for the source of it. A blonde, middle-aged woman who looked a bit worn out by life stood to the side of the doorway puffing on a cigarette.

“Sorry honey. Didn’t see you there,” the woman said in the hoarse, croaky voice of someone who had smoked their entire life. “You the new one?”

Tav nodded.

“I’m Tav,” she greeted. “Nice to meet you.”

“Linda,” the woman said curtly. “I live next door. Now…”

A beat of silence came as Linda took another long drag from the cigarette between her boney fingers. Tav looked at her for a moment and a smile tugged on her lips from the slight awkwardness of the pause that was just a moment too long.

“I won’t stop you from listening to loud music,” Linda continued after letting out a trail of smoke. “but I’ve got a heart condition, so be considerate of that. No blasting loud music out of nowhere. Turn the volume up gradually, you hear?”

Tav nodded again with a polite smile.

“I’ll remember that.”

She watched Linda’s bright turquoise nails tickled at her nose as she took another deep drag from the cigarette, all while she was watching her skeptically through her matching turquoise eyelids.

Tav’s eyes lingered on the cigarette for a moment. She cleared her throat.

“I know it’s not nice to test the hospitality of my neighbors from the get-go, but could I maybe borrow a cigarette?” Tav asked.

Linda blew out a cloud of smoke and slowly retrieved her pack from the maroon fanny pack around her waist. She opened the lid so she could take one. Tav placed it in her mouth and then looked from Linda’s face to her fanny pack.

“Could I borrow a lighter too?” Tav asked when she made no move to hand her one.

Linda fiddled with her bag at the same slow pace before pulling out a lighter and lighting the cigarette for her.

“Are you capable of smoking it yourself or do you need assistance with that too?” Linda quipped.

Tav grinned and took a drag of the cigarette. The nicotine made her body relax immediately.

She could already tell that she would like Linda. She knew her type because her old neighborhood had been filled with Lindas. She always had a weakness for those no-bullshit, chain-smoking ladies who you could see from the first glance had seen some shit in their life.

They should not be underestimated. They were always brutally honest, and they always had all the gossip.  

Linda looked her up and down and narrowed her eyes in thought.

“Yeah, you’re a pretty one,” Linda mused. “It won’t take long, no…Not long indeed.”

“For what?”

“For the master of the house to try and get in your pants,” Linda answered casually. “If he can get his cock out of Raha for even a second, that is. She’s a nympho. Watch out for that one. She’s one of those bisexuals or what you call them.”

Tav’s eyes widened, and she grinned at the candidness of her words.

“Yeah?” Tav said, a bit lost for words. “Interesting. Raphael a bit too old for me, I’m afraid.”

“He’s too old for Raha too but that doesn’t stop him,” Linda said with a huff and put out her cigarette. “Have you met with the others yet?”

Tav shook her head and took another drag of her cigarette.

“I’ve seen you and someone named John,” she said. “That’s it.”

“John has dementia,” Linda said bluntly. “He doesn’t talk much anymore. You haven’t met Raha and Oscar then. Raha is the nympho, Oscar is…”

She put her finger to her head and made the universal sign for craziness.

“I see,” Tav said. “Are you all close?”

“You’ve got to stay close in this madhouse,” Linda sighed. “We meet in the chapel usually. I’ll take you there.”

They went to the chapel. It was a piece of beautiful architecture, but it was very clear that it had not been used as a chapel for quite some time. Some of the benches had been arranged around tables that had been pulled inside from elsewhere.

Except for the fresco on the ceiling, the stained glass on the windows, and the cross on the wall, the chapel just looked like a well-used room for socializing and shared activities.

The three other residents were already in there.

John that she had met earlier was there, eating a pastry of some sort with shaking hands. Next to him sat a younger man in his thirties, who she guessed was Oscar.

Oscar was nervously biting at his nailbeds. He was brown-haired and looked up at her with the most beautiful and vivid green eyes she had ever seen. His eyes flicked over her.

Next to Oscar sat who could only be Raha: a gorgeous young woman with olive skin, dark hair and even darker eyes. She was playing with Oscar’s hair, which he seemed quite uncomfortable with.

“Everyone, Tav,” Linda said and gestured to her. “Tav, everyone. Come sit with us. Sit next to John. He doesn’t bite.”

Tav sat down and John turned to look at her with slight confusion.

“Maria?” John spoke quietly in a hoarse voice, his eyes lighting up a bit.

Linda gave a sympathetic sigh.

“Maria died, John,” Linda said in a loud voice so that the elderly man could hear her better. “This is a new one. Tav.”

“Tav…” John mumbled before returning his eyes to the pastry in his hands.

“Maria had your apartment before,” Linda explained and lit another cigarette. “Nice girl. She was about your age, which is why John’s confused. Tragic what happened to her… Aneurysm. It can even happen to the young ones.”

Tav noticed how Oscar’s eyes narrowed at that statement for some reason. He looked at Tav. His eyes flicked just above her head for some reason. He stared for a moment. Instinctively, Tav fixed her hair, expecting to find a leaf that had landed on her or something, but there was nothing. Oscar looked her in the eyes again.

“Did you already sign?” Oscar asked quietly.

“Yeah, yeah,” Tav answered. “Signed just about an hour ago. I’ll live next to Linda.”

“A pity,” Oscar mumbled in a dark tone.

Linda rolled her eyes and then looked at Tav, as if to tell her not to take him seriously.  

“What do you do, Tav?” Raha asked in an almost sultry tone. “Are you going to work here with us?”

“Uh, no,” she answered. “I already have a job, so… I have lectures to go to, so I can’t really avoid going into town anyway. My workplace isn’t far from where I study.”

Raha smiled and nodded. Her canines looked unnaturally sharp as she smiled. Her eyes trailed down to look at Tav’s cleavage. Tav pulled up the neckline of her shirt a bit and cleared her throat.

“Do you all work here?”

“Yes,” Raha said and reluctantly pulled her eyes away from Tav’s tits. “We all have our duties around here. Oscar fixes things and takes care of the garden, John is an assistant of sorts, Linda cleans…”

“And you?” Tav asked.

Raha’s gave her another toothy smile.

“A bit of this and a bit of that…” she said in a suggestive tone. “Mostly I just keep the master of the house happy.”

“Mhm,” Tav said with a nod and quickly changed the subject. “So…why is it that you all meet out here? I thought I saw a meeting room for the tenants on the map…”

“He doesn’t come here,” Oscar quickly said. “Raphael never comes out here.”

“That’s not to say that we hate the boss,” Linda quickly added and looked at Tav. “But he can be a bit controlling and nitpicky at times. Sometimes it’s nice to have a separation between church and state, so to say. A space where you can get away for a bit.”

“Makes sense, I suppose,” Tav mumbled.

“Speaking of churches,” Linda said and pointed to the corner of the room. “If you are religious there’s a little altar and some candles over there. No one but John really uses it, but he can share.”

Tav looked to where she was pointing and then nodded. There was a table with some candles and a small cross on it. She had never been particularly religious, so it didn’t matter a whole lot to her.

Linda checked the turquoise watch around her wrist.

“I’ve got work duty,” Linda said and took a final drag of her cigarette before putting it out. “Oscar, can’t you take care of the new one? Walk her back to her apartment and keep Raha away from her.”

Raha moved her hand to her heart in mock-offense at her words.

“Don’t be jealous, Lin,” Raha purred. “There’s plenty of me to go around.”

Linda huffed at her before walking out. Tav looked at Oscar and gave him a polite smile. He sighed before getting up from his seat.

“Come on then.”

“Hey about what you said earlier,” Tav said. “What did you mean by that? That it was a pity?”

Oscar was taking her through a huge garden. It was a different route than the one Linda had taken her on. The gardens were just as perfectly kept and beautiful as the rest of the house.

Oscar gave a small shrug.

“I’m not supposed to say.”

“Come on, now,” Tav urged. “Did I make a mistake by signing?”

Oscar looked at her with those green eyes of his. There was a tinge of sadness in his eyes and something else she couldn’t quite put her finger on. He shook his head.

“Doesn’t matter,” he sighed. “There’s no way out now anyway.”

“Please. Give me something. Moving brings enough anxiety in itself. I just want to know what I’m walking into. Is this all a scam? I had a feeling that it was.”

Oscar gave a long, tired sigh and shook his head.

“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you.”

“Try me. Please.”

He considered her for a moment. Their surroundings were beginning to look familiar now, meaning that they couldn’t be far from her apartment.

“Would you believe me if I said that you will never escape from here again?” Oscar said in a hushed tone. “That I’m not as crazy as the others make me out to be…that there is something seriously wrong with this place and…him.”

“Raphael?”

“Yes,” he said in an even quieter tone. “He’s not human, and I mean that in the most literal sense. Something is wrong with this place.”

Tav gave a sympathetic nod. She had dealt with people similar to him before. She had seen people with drug-induced psychoses. Drugs sometimes made her feel a little crazy too. Hallucinations, auditory and visual, and the delusions…

She was trying to determine what kind of crazy Oscar was.

“I see,” she said softly. “What is he then?”

“He’s not from here,” Oscar muttered and then looked at her with growing defeat in his eyes as he watched her expression. “You don’t believe me,” he said with a sad smile. “That’s alright…Just…take care. Your apartment is over there.”

Oscar pointed at her front door and then left before she could say anything. Now she felt terrible. She had not meant to be patronizing, just understanding. She sighed and walked in.

There was a letter stuck to the door of her apartment. She took it off before walking inside. It looked very official with a red wax seal and everything.

She opened it. It was an invitation to have dinner with Raphael.

Tav was led into the grand dining room of the estate by John who had greeted her at the door. The dining room was as lavish as the rest of the house. There were candles lit everywhere, shining their orange light over the gold and red furniture of the room.

The table was already set. It seemed that it was just going to be Raphael and her. Raphael lit up when he saw her. She self-consciously adjusted her clothes.

“I feel severely underdressed,” she said with an embarrassed chuckle. “My things haven’t gotten here yet, so…”

“Nonsense,” Raphael said. “You look fine just how you are. Please, sit.”

She sat down. Raphael took his seat at the head of the table.

“This is simply a little tradition we have here,” Raphael explained. “I find it useful to get to know who lives underneath my roof. Don’t feel nervous, dear. It is not an interrogation. Just dinner.”

“Just dinner,” she repeated with a nod. “Well. I’m an open book.”

Raphael poured a glass of wine for her and then himself.

“Let us get the unpleasantries out of the way, hm?” he said. “I was curious about this former boyfriend of yours. Your mother told me of his unsavory occupation. I trust he won’t be an issue for us?”

“No, no. It’s done and over with. He won’t come here or anything.”

“Good,” Raphael said with a smile. “His presence may prove difficult for one of our tenants. I won’t gossip, but you are not the only one who has had trouble with narcotics.”

“Okay,” Tav said with a tight smile and held up a hand to stop him. “I want to explain myself, because I feel like my mom might have filled your ears with her usual overexaggerated stories. I’m not really a drug addict.”

“No?” Raphael asked and took a bite of his food.

“No, not really,” she continued. “I did drugs, yes, but I wasn’t…’addicted’ to cocaine or to weed or to LSD or whatever. I just needed a little escape from reality every now and again, that’s all. I distanced myself from it when I felt like I was losing control over it. I’m clean now.”

Raphael gave a thoughtful hum and swirled the wine in his glass. He looked her over and a smile tugged on his lips.

“You would not say that a continuous craving for an escape or distractions is an addiction in itself?” Raphael challenged.

She bit the inside of her cheek in slight annoyance with how he pressed the subject. Also, in annoyance with how truthful that statement had described her former problems, but she would never admit that. She forced a small smile.

“I suppose,” she said with a shrug. “What can I say? I get bored easily and I have a hard time dealing with it. That’s all it is.”

She had always felt that way. She needed to be fully engaged in something interesting for her to feel like she was even alive. She needed something to obsess over. When she did drugs, everything was interesting. It was a nice replacement for a while, but at some point, even that became boring.

“Well, I can assure you that you won’t be bored here,” he said with a smile. “What were you trying to escape from, I wonder? Your boyfriend, perhaps?”

She shook her head.

“Just life, I suppose,” she said with a sigh. “No, Luke was fine. Nicest and most understanding boyfriend I have ever had, actually. I told him I couldn’t be with him because he did drugs. The truth is that I couldn’t be with him because I did drugs. He was a bit of a pushover, so telling him not to sell to me when I asked him didn’t really work, unfortunately.”

“Sounds like a painful separation,” he said.

“It was…” she said. “But it’s all over now. The relationship and the drugs. Things will be very different…”

She didn’t understand why she was telling him all of this, but still, she did. She felt as if she constantly needed to explain herself these days. It was as if she had a big brand on her forehead that said ‘addict’ and it was her new life’s purpose to explain that to everyone.

She cleared her throat.

“What about you?” she asked.

Raphael raised an eyebrow.

“What about me?”

“Who are you?” Tav asked and took a bite of her food. “Other than a very charitable landlord, I mean.”

Raphael leaned back in his seat and swirled the wine in his glass with a smirk.

“Your new neighbors haven’t spoken to you about me? I find that difficult to believe.”

“Only very little,” Tav said. “I’m sure your answer is different from theirs, anyway.”

“Oh, I’m sure,” he purred. “Though I am still very curious about what they have said so far.”

Tav took a long sip of her wine, which gave her a moment to think about what she could say without getting her fellow tenants into trouble. They all worked for him, after all. She didn’t want to jeopardize anyone’s livelihood or living accommodations by accident.

“Well,” Tav finally said and cleared her throat. “I got the idea that you are pretty close with your tenants. Other than that, it was mostly sort of confusing statements. Oscar believes you’re an alien or something, which wasn’t super helpful information.”

He let out a hearty laugh at that. Tav smiled and laughed along with him.

“He’s a very imaginative boy that one,” he said in an amused tone. “I believe he thinks I’m the devil. That is the usual warning he gives to newcomers.”

“The devil? Wow,” Tav said with a chuckle. “What did you do to earn that title?”

Raphael gave an almost coy shrug and sipped his wine.

“I pride myself on my ability to help people, but it is hard to do so when someone does not want to be helped. I suppose I might have lost my temper once but believe me when I say that it was only because I cared about what happened to our dear Oscar.”

Tav nodded in understanding as he explained.

“He is a very sweet and smart young man…whenever he remembers to take his medicine, that is, which is less and less these days. Though you will have no trouble with him. Even when he is off his medication, he has never been known to be violent or troublesome.”

“I see,” Tav said. “You still haven’t answered my original question though.”

Raphael gave her another shrug.

“It is a difficult question to answer,” he said. “I am many things, and I have my fingers in many pies, as they say. There is no set job description, but I can assure you that the most important work I do, I do here. Nothing is as rewarding as seeing my residents just…blossom.”

He smiled at her. There was something about him that she couldn’t quite put her finger on. A glint in his eye or something. She wasn’t sure. There was definitely something up with this man, she felt. She brushed it off for now.

Raphael poured her more wine and continued their chat for a while before Tav headed home to sleep her first night in her new home.

It was getting dark outside. Tav was making her bed when she heard an odd noise. She paused her movements for a moment, but it seemed as if the noise disappeared the moment she did so. She shook her head and wrote it down as her being jittery over sleeping someplace new.

She tried closing the troublesome window again. She grabbed the handle and pulled it shut, but it would still not go all the way down. She tried yanking harder on it, but nothing happened. She pulled harder on the handle, but then it would not go down at all.

She sighed and once again gave up.

She pulled her pants off and got under the covers. She gave a small sigh of relief as she lay down on the bed. It felt as if her spine aligned for the first time in months. The mattress was the perfect balance of firm and soft against her back.

She turned off the light. The moment she did, the noise returned.

It seemed to come from outside. It was a low, windy, moaning sound. She didn’t feel like getting up, so she squinted and looked out of the dysfunctional window. She could see on the trees and bushes of the barely lit garden, that there was no wind that was making the noise.

She was too tired and too comfortable to care at that moment. The house was ancient, after all. It was bound to make weird noises every now and again. She brushed it off and closed her eyes.

She quickly drifted into that state between being awake and being asleep. The noise became louder and clearer. She could have sworn that it suddenly sounded like a thousand people wailing and wheezing in despair.

Sleep quickly seemed to swallow her whole regardless.