#this is my number one weird nostalgia food

[beyoursledgehammer]

Baby wanted cream cheese and olives, baby got cream cheese and olives

[nomaishuttle]

ordered sonic.... yay

[theresattrpgforthat]

Hello! I have two (separate) genres im interested in recs for, if youve got them (though combined would be fascinating tbh): Horror and farming sim-like ttrpgs. Horror im sure is fairly common, just not in my circles (which are adventure fantasy based); farming sim though seems like it may be rarer? for that id be interested in either solo or with 2+ people

Theme: Horror Games

Hello friend, I’m going to let one of my older posts do some of the heavy lifting, and point you towards the Small Town Farming collection I put up back in 2022.

You are absolutely right that Horror is much easier to recommend, but I’ll also try and put some quick recs for solo-farming type games at the bottom of this post.

1978: The Night They Came Home, by World Champ Game Co.

1978: The Night THEY Came Home is a 1-2 player horror roleplaying game telling the story of a fateful showdown between Survivor (a clever and resilient person caught up in horrifying circumstances) and Slasher (a legendary force of evil). Using a deck of poker cards, dual rule books, varied resources, and shared play space, players will recount the events of a forsaken Halloween, zooming closer into the haunting folklore of a small Midwestern town and its inhabitants, and culminating in a violent battle for survival.

Here is a game for solo gamers and folks who want a more intimate experience. If you’re a fan of Friday the 13th, this is probably in your wheelhouse! 1978 has a win condition, meaning that either the Survivor or the Slasher will come away as the victor, and the fact that this is also a game that depends on a deck of cards means that I think this might also be a good game for folks who also enjoy card games and board games.

Vast Grimm, by Infinite Black.

EACH MISERABLE DAY THAT PASSES, THE UNIVERSE INCHES CLOSER TO ITS INEVITABLE DEMISE.

Vast Grimm is a stand-alone, art-filled, punk-fueled OSR role-playing game about the few humans remaining in a universe being consumed by growing parasitic würms.

Are you a MAnchiNe ravaged by war, pieced together with remnants of bots and the little flesh left of your body? Maybe you're a twisted biochemist shoving needles into your arms in hopes that this next fix will be the one that saves you and what’s left of humanity? Or perhaps you are a soul survivor, like a cockroach, doing whatever is necessary to stay alive even if it means the rest of your Legion must perish.

This is a game about survival, no matter how gruesome things get, humanity must survive.

If you’ve heard of MÖRK BORG and thought it was cool, and if you want the same kind of energy but in a sci-fi future full of mutant animals and horrific parasites, then you might want to check out Vast Grimm. Your characters will have to ration food, energy and ammo in an unending battle against the worms. This game looks to have a large amount of support, from expanded content, to a number of adventures, to an online character generator. For over-the-top violence, plenty of alien goo, and shambling pathetic characters that look like they might fall apart at any moment, try out Vast Grimm.

The Lost Bay, by IKO.

What Is The Lost Bay? The Lost Bay is a Suburban Gothic tabletop RPG se199X. The Lost Bay is also the name of the setting where the game takes place: a coastal suburb inspired by films and media from the 80s and 90s. In it you play as a young person touched by the Weird, an ancient force that gives you supernatural powers. You roam the Bay with your gang, its malls, arcade games shops, skateparks and beaches, and fight the Horror that has awakened.

The Lost Bay is a game for folks who like their horror drenched in 90’s nostalgia. Characters are archetypal, and each one comes with special powers. Using your powers is exciting and effective, but also brings you closer to Scars, horrible truths about the world around you that will irrevocably change your hometown.

The Lost Bay is great for planning heists, rescuing friends, and trying to get out of dodge when the going gets rough. It’s not about fighting your way out, but more about trying to keep you and your loved ones safe. A lot of game designers have had a riot putting together adventures for this game, which you can check out in this game jam. The link above is for the Kickstarter, but in case you see this game after the campaign finishes, you can also check the game out on Itch.

Flyover Country, by Headstone Hills.

Fields of wheat and corn ripple in the wind, hungry eyes peering out between the stalks. Billboards along the road advertise strange and dangerous attractions. Smiles are too wide, manners too polite, secrets buried too deep. The neon light of a diner glows in the distance, but you may never reach its doors. An empty highway stretches out to the horizon, then wraps back in around itself. This is Flyover Country.

Flyover Country is a Midwest road-tripping horror role-playing game for 4-6 players: one gamemaster, or Watcher, and 3-5 players, or Drifters. It is designed to be played in one setting and without prep. It only requires paper, writing utensils, and a tarot deck.

This is a great option for a group where the GM is uneasy about doing a lot of prep. While one person acts as the Watcher, much of the events in this game are simply generated by drawing tarot cards from a deck. Characters will also draw from the Major Arcana to determine what their secret is - and what special ability it has given them. This is a game of hidden information, and grinding your characters down towards a tragic or grisly end.

Gravemire, by Clawhammer Games.

Gravemire is a tabletop roleplaying game about death, growth, horror, and survival, based in an original mechanical framework and set in the churning waters of the Louisiana bayou circa 1894. Players slip into the roles of outsiders arriving in the town of Scarstone, a rural outpost that has been warped by a terrible transformation known as the Convulsion. Once, Scarstone was surrounded by similar towns. The Bayou once had an end. Now, unknowable numbers of horrors seep through the uncharted backwaters, strange magic contorts reality to its whims, and the settlements that called Scarstone their neighbour jut half-ruined from the mire like bones from a wound. Times have changed.

Gravemire is a pretty brutal game, not afraid to kill your character and steal their soul. The town of Scarstone is a trap; your characters wandered in one day through curiosity or the desire for adventure, but leaving the town isn’t nearly as easy. Characters are built using a point-buy system, and as you play you may acquire more skill - but you will also acquire Aversions, which sap your Willpower and inhibit your ability to muster through the worst of what the game can throw at you.

If you want to check out an abbreviated version of the game, you can check out the Kickstarter playkit here.

Under the Autumn Strangely, by Graham Gentz.

"Under the Autumn Strangely" is a storytelling game of pastoral horror priming with anachronistic Americana set in a land that Never Was.

Inspired by "Over the Garden Wall" created by Patrick McHale, players collaboratively create a world uncanny and old. Codify and encourage tonal clash as the Three Roles meld whimsy, autumnal melancholy, and dread.

Take a wrong turn on a dusty road. Follow the sign past the red barn with peeling paint. Doubt your senses.

Get a little lost.

Welcome to the Never Was.

From what I understand about this game, it works best with three players, as there are three roles that the participants are expected to embody. One person plays the Arcadian, who embodies the landscape and setting. One person plays the Traveller, who acts as a “main” character. One person plays the Terror, which grows to dominate the story. Each role can only add to to one role’s suggestions, and can only deny the other’s. If you want to mix your horror with nostalgia and a romanticized vision of the rural USA, you might want to check out Under the Autumn Strangely.

The Facility, by Galen Pejeu.

You awaken, cold and in the dark. Fumbling around by low blue lights in a coffin shaped pod. You pull yourself out of the box, and in the dark see the faces of others. You are all wearing loose fitting white clothing and laceless shoes. Hospital patients? 

You peer into the dark, seeing little but hearing the sound of dripping, running water and distant machinery. You gather what you can, knowing that something is hunting you. It will be here soon.

Wait.

Can you remember who you are?

The Facility is a game for any number of players, taking on the role of ordinary people, stripped of their memories and trapped in a hostile and insane labyrinth of machines and interdimensional weirdness.

The Facility places your crew into an unknown place full of machines that want to kill you. It’s great for high-action scenes, and since your characters have lost their memories, I think the struggle to find pieces of who you are (or were) is a great way to zoom in and make the horror personal. The game is Breathless, so expect your character’s gear and/or abilities to slowly wear down over time, and for the staked to get bigger every time you pause to try and re-stock. If you want a science-fiction twist to your horror game, check out The Facility.

You Should Also Check Out...

My Shudders Rec Post

The Curse of the House of Rookwood, by Nerdy Pup Games.

Nature, Town, Farm, Villagers, by CardboardHyperfix.

Weeds in the Waste, by Meghan Cross

The Wandering Tea Garden, by AP.

Green Thumb, by Curious Frog.

The Bonsai Diary, by Sticky Doodler.

Iron Valley, by M.Kirin.

[vixstarria]

✨Prepare for an unsolicited info dump✨

I was tagged by @herdarkestnightelegance - thanks!

Do you make your bed? Yes, always - I might leave other things lying around, but the bed is the no. 1 thing that always gets done - otherwise the bedroom looks too messy and irks me

Favorite number? I don't have a favourite number.

What’s your job? So... I work in a small law firm as the person who does everything but provide legal advice. Accounts, IT, HR, admin, random paralegal stuff - I'm your guy (gn). No one at work really knows exactly what it is I do, but they generally assume I'm always busy, which provides ample opportunity to shitpost on tumblr during work hours. E.g. right now. I love my job.

If you could go back to school would you? Absolutely not, I still have PTSD and recurring nightmares about school. I mean, I don't mind learning, per se, but I would strongly prefer it to be on my own terms, remote, and outside of a formal academic environment. And definitely not in the country I grew up and went to school in.

Can you parallel park? Strangely enough, yes. I do note that I do not have a license, however.

Do you think aliens are real? There has to be alien life of some kind out there, but it won't be little green men in blinking flying saucers. ...Although then again, hey, within the infinity of the universe, maybe there ARE little green men in saucers as well, somewhere, who knows?

Can you drive a manual car? Strictly within the confines of an empty parking lot - sure

What’s your guilty pleasure? Oh gosh, of what kind? Food - spicy ramen noodles with a bunch of stuff (mushrooms, egg, etc) thrown in. I love it, but I swear I immediately gain a kg any time I have a bowl. Music - early 2000's R&B, pop and nu metal. It's nostalgia, okay? Media - reality fashion shows that involve competitions, e.g. Project Runway, or ANTM. And cooking shows, but I don't feel guilty about those lol.

Tattoos? No, nothing's ever struck me as significant enough for me to want to have it on my skin permanently. If I had a weird scar I would cover it up with a tattoo, though.

Favorite color? Purple, especially lilac and lavender shades.

Favorite types of music? It fluctuates, but I've mostly been on an electronic / industrial binge lately.

Do you like puzzles? Puzzles often make me feel like an idiot, but if there is no timer, pressure or audience - sure. ...Or like, jigsaw puzzles? I fkn LOVE jigsaw puzzles.

Any phobias? Nope.

Favorite childhood sport? Bold of you to assume I participated in ANY sport as a child, much less had a favourite. Uh. Ice skating and rollerblading was fun, I guess. I sometimes contemplate getting rollerblades again, but then I also rather enjoy all my bones being intact. 🤔

Do you talk to yourself? All the time, although mostly in the form of muttered swears and various exclamations.

What movies do you adore? I'm going to pass on this one, or it might turn into a very long rant. To summarise: I like weird movies, horror and comedy horror. Some examples: Mulholland Drive, Eraserhead, Army of Darkness.

Coffee or tea? Both. Start the day with coffee, then drink tea for the remainder. I'm very particular with my coffee though - every morning begins with a little ritual of grinding whole beans and preparing it with a french press.

First thing you wanted to be growing up? One of my earliest memories is me wondering what I wanted to be when I grew up, and my little 4 or 5 year old brain thinking that my only options were teacher, doctor and cashier, for some reason, and being sad because I didn't want to be any of those. I don't think I ever wanted to be anything, as a child - I just wanted to read my books and play with my toys. In fact, I still feel that way. 😠

No pressure tagging (and sorry for any repeats): @spacebarbarianweird @thechaoticdruid @snowfolly @brabblesblog @confused-butter-toast @tragedybunny

[chibivesicle]

The Ranma 1/2 remake is giving me feelings

That's right. In this era of anime remakes, Ranma 1/2 is stepping up to the plate and will be animated by Studio Mappa! I do like me some works by Mappa. I just saw the new OP for it and so much of it refers directly back to the original OP, including keeping a few key animation sequences! I dunno - I don't want to be disappointed by it but at the same time I want to watch it.

Out of all of the remakes bouncing around this one pulls at me the most. Sure, I was all on board with Sailor Moon Crystal ten years ago but Ranma 1/2 was the first manga I ever bought! The nostalgia and continued love of the series is strong within me.

It is definitely hitting different seeing that this was my first manga series ever. I put a Shampoo sticker in my Ti-34 calculator which only recently went on the fritz at the ripe old age of twenty-eight and is still in my desk at work. I have a Ranma 1/2 poster still in my old closet at my parents' house (someday I should actually, you know, grab it), I bought fan art at Anime Expo in 2022 and even this summer I got a Ranma double sided charm from a local artist at an Asian food festival who also tables at local cons/art markets. I have to admit, I got all excited for the Trigun reboot and if you've been reading along you know I was incredibly disappointed. And you also have a rough estimate of my age based on when I watched it originally as a fan sub. Yet if there is any series that can be used to date me it is Ranma 1/2 since I bought all of my manga before university. I oddly kept telling myself I'd round out the collection when I got older and had more money to complete it. I never did and it has remained a mess of the original Viz editions. Behold! The first English edition of Ranma 1/2 in the left-to-right, hand lettered, and redrawn sound effects all in English.

Volume 1 cost $16.95 when I bought it which would have worked out to a whopping $33 adjusted for inflation, with a publication date of May 1993. Purchasing those early volumes from Viz was not for the faint of heart or those with shallow pockets. This is reminding me why I never back filled volumes 5-7 within my own collection, coming in at $15.95 each. I'm pretty sure that a few of them were likely Christmas presents as well . . .

These editions are what eventually came to match the size of the Viz Signature versions like Maison Ikkoku and Gokinjo Monogatari. These are hefty books and have held up pretty well over the years.

So I now find myself in the exact same position I was in before Trigun Stampede - do I reread the manga and finish it off since I likely only read the first third of it? And then do I take the time to review the new anime from Mappa?

Unlike Trigun which required me to start from scratch having only watched the anime, I've read up to volume 12 of the original manga and filled in the gaps by watching the original anime back in 2014/2015 to around where I'd read it - I think.

One of the issues is that I have the old format for it where there are no chapter numbers like it would have run in the weekly magazine to directly compare with. Viz did a really weird format since it started out as a comic with different arcs and parts and all mine have part 1-13/14 per volume. If I'm not mistaken, there were two subsequent editions of Ranma 1/2 in English; a right-to-left reprint of the original Japanese tankobon with the sequential chapter numbers from the magazine which then was later bundled into a 2 in 1 edition also in the right-to-left format.

Going by chapter names, I'm going to check out various volumes of the 2 in 1 edition from my local library and hope they line up to cover my gaps and then continue onward from chapter 142, The Mark of the Gods.

I also read the edition which really struggled to describe okonomiyaki to a non-Japanese reader. For several years, my young mind tried to square how they were like pizza when they were made on a griddle but had lots of toppings?!?!

I still don't know why the translators chose to localize it this way. They could have simply called it a savory pancake and it would have solved a lot of reader confusion.

It wasn't until university when I was hanging out with friends that I had the chance to make real okonomiyaki (a friend's roommate was Japanese) and the first thing I blurted out was something along the lines of "Like Ukyo from Ranma!" Granted, Ukyo was one of my fav characters at the time. Anyhoo, perhaps I'll do some meta posts as I read the manga and build up to watching the new anime. I don't think I'll have it in me to compare to the original anime since I read the manga long before watching the anime here in there for about fifteen years. I'm also curious to compare the later English editions with mine to see if there are some minor differences or not. I haven't seen the solid colored books like mine since I bought them in the first place.

[tellytuber]

12 Shows of 2022

The new (and sometimes old) series and seasons that made my year.

Law & Order (S1-12) + Law & Order: Criminal Intent + Law & Order: Los Angeles I started off the year catching the early (and Best) seasons of the mothership via cable reruns; got Peacock for CI; and then returned midyear when I was half-gone from covid and blearily endured the commercials of what was then IMDBtv for the very LA edition. While I am not technically a "geriatric millennial," I am a millennial and with geriatric interests. For me, peak television has become something that I can either focus on fully or play in the background while I do other things and be equally thoroughly entertained. That is why this franchise has become my number one comfort show.

Shrink + Michael: Tuesdays Thursdays Grouping these into one because I just so happened to watch one immediately after the other, and because they're both about moderately adept therapists who are codependent with their patients. They are also both incredibly funny! These got the biggest laughs out of me than anything else all year. (A shame I didn't get to them till December.) While they are both hilarious, each manage to sweep into very heavy topics and deep emotion without toppling over. #ReviveShrink

Big Love While I’m pretty sure I’ve watched more L&O than anything else this year, I’m deeming 2022 the year of sister wives. In my post marathon blues, I went surfing on HBO and turned on Big Love (after once trying the pilot a while ago and being turned off by its HBO-ness.) But this time it hit me right in the late-00's cable nostalgia. The melodrama, the humor, the cast - Mary Kay Place! It's a (new) classic for me.

Grand Crew (S1) With its simple if derivative set-up, this delightful sitcom got better and better every episode! The ensemble is funny and charming, and the stories silly and fun. Thank god it snagged a renewal and will return because I will need my weekly fix of Carl Tart in between his Comedy Bang! Bang! appearances.

American Auto (S1) At base level, it's just another workplace comedy with a pseudo diverse cast. And the setting of the executive floor of a car company is quite baffling. (It's not even a riff on Telsa. Neither is it too concerned with Detroit.) But it all came together during the commercial episode: During which the team spiral in heated disagreements over how to shoot a commercial that is appropriately inclusive but not too inclusive. Funny! From then on, I started to watch it from a new angle. The ensemble itself is a focus group - and every week is a new satirical debate on the weird standards of contemporary ethics. The show is at its best when it’s everyone in the conference room talking over each other in the voices of their respective demo. I still don't necessarily like it - But it does get me thinking. (About all that I wish it was!) But honestly, I'm only really including this on the list because of the perfect Cyrus played by Michael Benjamin Washington who is never not incredibly funny. He was my favorite character/performance of the year.

Severance (S1) Part Office Space, part Fringe, with the style of Legion. This trippy, beautiful, and exciting drama was a dream to watch! Especially since I watched most of it in the very very early morning with a cup of coffee - the very best way to watch something creepy.

Claws (S4/final) While, the finale was one of the worst I've ever seen (Niecy Nash's scenes were almost exclusively Facetimed!) - This show will go down as being one of the most iconic. The outfits, the colors, the insane swings. It was never not outrageous and gonzo. Did it always work? I don't know. But they had a Vision and Went For It! It was always a wild ride, and I had fun.

Better Things (S5/final) Every year Better Things airs, it automatically gets a spot on my list. And this is the last time. A beautiful show so full of humor and love and art and great music and lots of food.

Search Party (S5/final) Every season comes with a genre turn. And when this one turned, I didn't want to believe it. It wasn't until it turned to black without the Actually It Was All A Dream rewind I was expecting did it set in. I have yet to rewatch it, but when I do I'm sure I'll love it (as my experience with S3). But I do understand it. For Dory, who began the show adrift and yearning for a meaning to her life - to enact some sort of change, to literally change the world is a fitting end. (For me, S4 is the real ending and this is a bonus season.) Either way, it still earns a spot in the TV Hall of Fame. A crazy comedy with twisty mysteries. Extremely sharp and biting, confident in its hipsterness, unafraid of being unlikable - An ideal close to my heart.

Sister Wives (S17) As Elizabeth Laime so astutely put it in the Sister Wives spin-off of Bitch Sesh: There is no other show in which less time was spent making it than time spent watching it. Save for the very beginning (of the end) when Robin joined the family, nothing has happened. (Save for The Catfish, and even then nothing actually happened.) But all that nothing was for the cameras. Big Happy Family propoganda. And this was the season it all fell apart. Now, too much is happening! Cody-19! Christine leaving! Robin wants to talk! Janelle needs a truck for her trailer! (To Cody's dismay) Meri is also there! The knife to the kidneys! As I said before: This was the year of the sister wives. Incredible television.

Evil (S3) The beginning of this season had a lot of splitting up of the trio, which bummed me out. But it made the eventual reunion of the team that much more satisfying, and each of their individual crises of belief more affecting in their isolation. Every season is more weird, more tense, more absurd. I love it so very much! 

My Liberation Notes Every year I have one thing that completely consumes me. This year it was My Liberation Notes. It captured me from the very first episode: A story about a introversion and anti-socialism, when to hold on to it and when to let it go. A story about adult siblings, reared together yet all very different people seemingly in different worlds. So many existential ruminations. Plus an exceedingly slow teasing romance, barely one in the conventional sense, but deeply so as a connection of souls. All about life and its disappointments and mundanity, what beats you down and how you change, how people change you and how you change others.

[benefits1986]

Subject-Background Alignment

Snipping photos and vids more intentionally is making me more alive. Always. Sometimes. Never.

December 2023 is peppered with a lot of snipper mode when it comes to photos and vids. While I try to stay away from my phone, truth is that, I can't help but bring it out and snap away. I guess, this is me, paying homage to mother dragon's weird tradition --taking crappy photos of me to keep me sane. By crappy I mean, awkward and really candid ones. Since films are not cheap, she just made sure that the flash worked each and every bloody time. I grew up shushing this tradition because I felt that she does not have any creative gene, both recessive and dominant. But, mom did not care at all.

She was too caught up in freezing time and stories with flashes. When our compound back in Pasay was in the middle of a fire across the street, she unapologetically toted my bike and my photo album along with my feeding bottle. She told me to hold her hand and never ever sneak around for once. I was so young then, but I could still feel her clenched hand around my frail hand until now. I didn't cry because mom was full on dragon mode. She was super pregnant that time and we had to pass by the tiny alley sideways. My dad who had a super hard time finding us after the fire was averted almost whacked my mom's face. He's not abusive physically. He was just so worried about us and he didn't realize mom can walk very far from the fired up street. Mom shared that she plainly told dad that all she wanted was a place where we'd be totally safe. Dad knew mom was bleeding still so he didn't want another encounter with miscarriage.

I've told this story a good number of times, but this time, it hits differently. While nostalgia bears pain, I guess, I'm now coming into an alignment with it. Finally, this year, while I still don't want my photos taken as much as possible, I'm finding my lights and shadows bit by bit. The flash is no longer that much of an eye sore and a heart break. The trigger is no longer too haunting. The sound of the click is a bit more bearable to hear. The film dream in more than 50 shades of black and white and beyond is finally ready to be in the dark room. Or is it because one of the things I'm gonna hunt down in Japan 2024 would be my dream camera and a decent prime lens? HIHIHIHI.

I'm still learning more and more about un-CTRL + ALT + DEL my feelings. It's always a work in progress. In fact, yesterday, I saw my cousin posted a series of photos with my Tito Taurus, the OG Berdugo who's the first to make me his passenger princess with food trip sa tabing-daan on his proudly curated cars -Jeep, L200, Civic, Pajero, Musso and Patrol --all in black with tinted windows (except for the Jeep). It made me cry for a few minutes. Dad comforted me saying that he worked too much so he died too soon. He even added that I should be finishing off my deadlines so that I can have a real leave after so many things that happened especially in Q4.

Towering Tito Taurus taught me to pray even when his sins screamed in scarlet. There were so many times when I stared at him as he touched the rosary on his rear view mirror. I knew he was no saint, but he knew that he is paying for his sins like road rage and hitting the gas pedal too much. His roadtrip indulgence: Going at 180 kph without seatbelts and overtaking huge ass container trucks as he sneered and eventually step on the break. He also pushed me to my limits even when his schedule was too busy. In between his morning coffee, cigs and his daily broadsheet routine, he checked on my progress or the lack of thereof. Until now, his presence and his absence keep me on my toes. Whenever I'm faced with shit stuff which centers my career, I find myself asking: What would Tito do if he was here? I often remember him saying that while he knew I looked up to him, he told me to do better. Choose more wisely. He never mentioned about going after money or status; and I guess that's what I liked best about him. Instead, he told me to make sure I nail down negotiations. At a young age, I was dumbfounded. LOL. But, what I vividly remember are the countless times that he'd trigger debates around topics I don't give a fuck about like world news. I always lose; but he kept these nasty bonding moments coming. I tried running away from these especially during weekends, but Tito would lure me into roadtrips that I would always say yes to. LOL. Gala po talaga ako e. E gala rin Tito ko.

While mom would tell me: Saan ka na naman pupunta at sino na naman kasama mo? Tito would just wink at mom and the rest is history. For the record, I don't have hidden skeletons about my Tito. However, Tito's carino brutal vibe is not joking at all. While driving, he'd find my cheek and kurot to the max. 'Yun lang talaga maambag ko e. I remember telling him to stop a lot which he did, but seeing him find some sense of lessened stress is me compromising my comfort. When I no longer budged, Tito started upping the ante of pinching my cheeks and he wondered why I'm no longer triggered. I told him that I'm totally fine. Later, he outgrew this lambing and told me that I'm no longer a kid and that I have to look after myself better as the big world is coming soon. I didn't know what he meant then. 'Wag daw ako papaapi kahit kanino, kahit saan, kahit kailan. I was dumbfounded yet again, but, said okay. Noted. He told me that should there be any trouble, big or small, he'd be ready to show them who's the real berdugo. Syempre, takot ako kasi Tito shoots na, init ulo pa lagi and protective of me.

If there's a Time-Turner right now, I guess, I'd go back to the days where he asked me to join his work force. LOL. Even for a couple of months, I'd pray and slay it with him. Hug ko pa siya IRL with lambing. LUH.

Naunahan lang talaga ako ng pride and ego because he'd put me right beside him agad. Wala ng explanation. I knew he got more than butt hurt during his official invitation before I graduated which I vehemently rejected. He didn't budge and tried again many times. I saw his eagerness and hatred. LOL. I wanted him to pay for his scarlet sins so badly and so graphically. HAHAHAHA. But, I had to make a choice which is to look after mother dragon. I guess, this is the part I didn't open up to him. He kept telling me that it's time for me to be under his wing so that I can have a career path that's better than him. Sabi pa niya, 'wag ako mag-worry kasi 'di naman same last names namin, so it's easier for him to maneuver his way for me. Truth is that, I purposefully rejected his really logical and generous offer because I wanted to choose more wisely. I knew he hated it and that I am off to a grandiose silent debate with him. If I remember it right, he told me one time: So, diyan ka na lang talaga sa bahay? Ganyan ka na lang talaga? I said yes, flatly. No explanations. (Wala pa kasing WFH option back then. LOL.). Side Note: I had another job offer which was my then dream job so, ego pasok. Kung dream job ko nga, I rejected without mincing a word, siya pa ba? Tabi. Sorry na agad. Mom ko prio ko sa universe ko noon e. I could have been more intentional instead of disproving my Tito with more than one towering white horse with rancho pa at mga lupain. I could have told him that this is me making him proud even when things at home, especially finances and cheating mom's death are too big of KPIs for the newly adult me. I guess, I failed at aligning with him to the core.

That said, may this 2023 and 2024 be bound by intentional alignments. May I choose more wisely without pride, prejudice and of course, my seven-foot ego. May I try to make more stories happen instead of vehemently and creatively rejecting them just because I'm in deep fear of the unknown and my favorite, tabula rasa. May I allow myself to make things better be it weekdays or weekends, too. May I permit the lessons I've graphically learned to take me to places and spaces that would make epic roadtrips and food trips as I carry with me the badge of mother dragon and Tito Taurus. Kaloka. Sana maggawa ko coz, it's time, yes?

[apple-jorts]

((I’m responding via reblog since I have a lot to say !! <3

Don’t worry being so critical and rambling!! Everything you say is literally so true and I love hearing ur thoughts! it’s really funny that even a casual watcher can even point out how annoying the show is lol- I’m gonna go down a number list of things I hate the most ab the show personally :))

Here’s a general contents table:

1. What the show has become / shock value

2. Lazy writing

3. Contradictory “centrism”

4. South park’s creepy writing staff / art department

5. Trey and Matt are dicks

6. Final thoughts

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1. South Park has been going on for 27 years now and has 328 episodes; initially when the show became popular it wasn’t for the reason it is today- the show started off in 1997 and gained its popularity for being silly- like that’s literally it— it was four young boys in a weird little town dealing with aliens, zombies, genetic engineering, Satan, etc. and now it’s just like.. watching a bunch of high schoolers be racist & self righteous- like- if I wanted to see that I’d go on Twitter.

The issue with turning them into Twitter user high schoolers just shows.. Like you said.. that they’ve gotten LOST in their shock value obsession. Shock value is fine when you can.. ya know.. BE shocking— but hearing cartman slur over and over isn’t.. interesting anymore— there’s only so many times he can rag on Black, Mexican, Jewish, etc. people before it’s just a GROANER. And it lost its “”charm”” back in season 5 at best.

s1 consisted of a melting pot of different plots that ALWAYS kept you on your toes.. but you watch s26 for example and it’s always EXACTLY what you’re expecting is going to happen. Bc southpark has dried up, and they have nothing left to do but reuse lines and plots back from the early days. (One of the most annoying parts of this is there IS things they can still do… but they just don’t bc they’re cowards now.)

But I think they’ve gotten too lost in trying to be shocking than to try and return to their roots.. bc they feel as if they need to cover every current event in order to stay relevant.. bc season 26 consisted of:

-making fun of Kanye West / TikTok

-the Harry and Megan debacle

-hyping up bidets(?) / Andrew Tate cameo

-chat GPT

-Trump still interacting with his supporters

And season 26 is one of their worst seasons to date- I wonder why /s ,, It’s just gotten so stale!

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2. Lazy writing. It probably takes a phyco who watches the show too much to point out some of the shit they’ve reused, but I’m that guy so here we go. South Park has an issue of taking a joke/plot and forgetting they used it already.. some examples include..

Turd Burglers & The End Of Obesity

- Several of the mothers of southpark both form a mini club involving weight loss. In Turd Burglars they were injecting fecal matter into themselves to loose weight, in The End Of Obesity they were injecting ozempic. Same concept, different setting.

Member Berries & Back to the Cold War

- Being scared and finding comfort in nostalgia

Quintuplets 2000 & Pajama Day & I’m a Little Bit Country

- Making fun of protesters who don’t know what they’re actually protesting / protesting because it benefits them in some way

Ass Burgers & The End Of Obesity

- Representatives/Mascots of Fast food / Cereals who band together to take down those who are threatening them. Same concept, different setting

Dead Kids & World War Zimmerman & Cartman finds Love & The China Problem & The Snuke &

- Cartman being racist- like- the whole plot of the episode is him being disgustingly racist- where it’s not funny, it’s not shocking, it’s just annoying and grating. This list is episodes I will deliberately skip when they come on bc they’re so gross.

((And ya know that’s not even all of em, those are off the top of my head. They’ll even reuse jokes over and over and be beating a dead horse 🙃

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3. Centrism. As annoying as Trey and Matt’s centrism is.. I think the more annoying bit is the fact that they’re not even FULLY centrist. Their views will teeter from left to right, shine through, contradict, and so on. They’ll be for gay rights.. and then they won’t be- they’ll act like global warming isn’t real.. then they’ll act like it is- they’ll say that trans people transitioning is stupid and bodily mutilation, and then they’ll say they can go in whichever bathroom is the most comfortable to them and that it shouldn’t matter who you present as???? It literally makes no sense.. you can’t be for full out centrism and then constantly go against it,,, then Ppl will defend them and say “well they hate everyone, so you can’t actually be offended!” Like.. fuck you- they don’t hate everyone, they literally just love themselves.

—I’m gonna use their stances on gayness as my prime example here bc it’s a relevant, ongoing, back and forth thing that happens in the show.

I’m not gonna fw people who can’t give a straight answer on if they’re for gay rights or not- that should be a pretty straight forward human right that you should use your platform to elevate (like family guy or something!)— and that’s the WORST part- they do! I swear they have more gay/bi men & woman characters than any other cartoon I’ve seen?? All of them are pretty relevant recurring characters too- they have Big Gay Al, Principal Victoria, Mr. Slave, Liane Cartman, Stan’s dog, Harrison Yates, Steven Stotch, Ned & Jimbo, Father Maxi, Harold Cartman, Tweek & Craig, Mr. Garrison, Bill & Fosse, Towlie, Bradley, Ms. Ellen, Rick, and so on.

So why put in all that effort to showcase gay people in your show, just to also say gay people don’t deserve rights.. but also say that they do?? See my issue here? It’s mental gymnastics.

Also chalk this up to lazy writing where throughout the years they actually FORGET their stance on a subject so it changes..

And say that this gay thing is just another puzzle piece in the “we hate everyone” bigger picture.. then why is there never an episode defending a conservative crowd? Never an episode defending the pro-life far righters? Jesus freaks? Bc they DONT BELEIVE in the right.. They CONSTANTLY make fun of the right, and advocate for gay rights / civil left ideology..

-they have an episode where Stan and Kyle leagalize gay marriage and make some REALLY good points that totally take down the “gays can’t have kids” crowd

-the kid’s defend Gay Al in his fight against the Scouts, the whole town has a freak out when someone spray paints “get out fags” on the wall

-the whole town LOVES Tweek x Craig and have fanart of them hanging in all their houses and all over the town (also, the whole episode was Craig’s dad trying to come to terms with his son being gay and was the only one really struggling with the change, but by the end of the episode gave the most heartwarming scene arguably in the whole show, which probably spoke VOLUMES to whatever dad irl was dealing with the same issue!)

-Big Gay Al’s Big Gay Boat ride (s1 btw) defends the gay experience and shows that everyone needs to be accepting and love their friends and family gay or not. I mean COME ON…… is that NOT a point towards what their main opinion on the matter is??

But then of course they’ll turn around and make dumb homophobic quips and weird preachy speeches and outwardly shun celebrities for standing for gay rights. It’s like they don’t know where to stand and it’s ANNOYING.

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((Cw for discussing more se*ual content that the show deals with.. all words will be partially hidden and it’s all in reference to the show !!))

4. The show is progressively getting more fetishy. Now call me insane for this one, but watching the show consistently you pick up on how much this stuff is done and it’s just so.. creepy.

I’m not a butters fan so I MIGHT sound biased (and I’m sorry if u are, this is more aimed at the writers than it is at the character!) but I swear that the general purpose of his character is to be p*do bait— the fact that he ma*terbat*s and c*ms frequently, performs se*ual depraved acts, and it’s all excused under the guise of “immaturity of a child”, is really, really strange.

Have you also noticed butters consistently stays naive despite all the characters maturing? They’ll use his mature side so rarely it’s like it’s not even a thing he’s capable of…. He just seems to exist to be infantilized and se*ualized. It’s the immaturity of a child talking about adult topics that seems to be a big thing with butters, and it’s just weird.

Have you also noticed the progression of the characters feet getting steadily more detailed? It’s gotta be a fetish thing— the whole show is in a simplistic construction paper style… until the feet.. (this is like super relevant in the newest special too it’s fucking off putting)

Like it definitely hasn’t gone unnoticed by their fans either.

But anyways, there’s just an odd, odd, odd, amount of butters specifically being se*ualized by the writers when this doesn’t happen nearly as much / at ALL with the other characters.. and if there IS se*ulaizing content, it’s IMPLIED.. like Kenny dying from a bj! It was Implied!

But with butters I’ve had to hear him j*ck it, watch him have w*t dreams, watch him get b*ners, listen to him DESCRIBE getting b*ners, get an anal probe inserted in him, seen him dry h*mp another character, heard his physical preferences of women, seen his c*m closet, seen his p*nis way too many times, seen him almost get a d*ck in his mouth, and MORE- fucking MORE— it’s gotta be some kinda fan-service pedo bait thing there’s literally no explaining ur way out of this….

Or just maybe, this is ANOTHER shock value thing that honestly falls flat on its face bc of how creepy it is and now many times it happens—

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5. It amazes me that 90% of the SP fandom loves Trey and Matt and find them cute and charming… they are like actually the worst I’m not even kidding. They are tone deaf, ass bag, cis, straight, white guys who try and act oppressed while also jerking themselves off with every episode they make or press conference they release.

There’s a sub Twitter called mattreytwt and they like.. babify these 50 y/o men it’s INSANE??

Now onto my biggest qualms with these men!

Like I previously said, Trey and Matt NEVER know where they stand.. there’s a difference between being centrist and making some points you believe in and then disagreeing with those points later—- like they make fun of everyone in a way that comes across as centrist, like how they make fun of every religion out there- but then they turn around and make an episode like Mr. Garrison’s fancy new vagina, that’s completely biased that spreads outright misinformation and totally butchers the trans experience and compares gender reassignment surgery to getting a surgery to turn you into an animal ://

Now I’m gonna list a slight few of the most jaw dropping shit they’ve done:

-I was listening to one of their creator commentaries for the movie BLU, and they talk about how one of them had met an actress who was super stoked to meet him and she said something like “I’ve been waiting so long to finally get to know you” and tried to make a joke and said back “and now that I have I realize you’re a piece of shit” and the woman took it as HIM calling HER a piece of shit and she walked away and he joked that he never talked to her again and he was laughing ab it???

-They also said that the inspiration for Cartman’s anti-cussing shock chip in the movie was inspired by him putting a shock collar on his dog and laughing at the dog kept barking and shocking itself,,,

-You also wanna know the main reason that Trey and Matt hate Barbara Streisand so much? It’s bc she was against Colorado's Amendment 2, which repealed gay-rights legislation in that state. She called Colorado a bunch of hicks for standing up proud against gay rights, and Trey and Matt hated her for that- and then had the AUDACITY to make Big Gay Al a character

-They’ve admitted numerous times that they pride themselves on being hated and get a small kick out of every time they burn a bridge with another celebrity and it’s “part of the gig”

-Speaking of Big Gay Al.. in the episode “Cripple Fight” Al was kicked out of his position as Scout Leader for being gay, so the boys tried to get him back in and succeeded, shunning the scout group for not allowing gays— all well and good.. until Trey and Matt (again.. two straight men) wrote a gay man saying that it was the scouts “personal decision” who to let into their club and that should be respected…. Fucking FLOORED. FUCK you, gay rights are not up for “personal preference”

-then in the episode Timmy 2000 their shining moral at the end of the episode says that “it’s totally fine laughing at disabled people as long as they don’t know that you’re laughing at them” jaw dropped, sorry.

-the episode Cartman’s Silly Hate Crime 2000 was also INSANE.. they were trying to get the viewer to agree that there “is no such thing as a hate crime…” as if ppl didn’t and still don’t get hurt just for existing,,,, like tf you mean “all crime is a hate crime” ://///

-In order to hold up their Centrism and their “we make fun of anyone!” Ideology.. they decided to make an episode making fun of Scientology. Now, that’s fine, Scientology is a cult and I agree with that… but the fact that they were close friends with Isaac Hayes (Chef) at the time who was an OPEN scientologist.. it’s weird that they literally decided to sever ties with him FOREVER just to make a half hour episode.. like it really shows how little care they have for even people they care about in the long run.

-the PETTINESS is insurmountable.. Phil Collins won the Oscar back in 1999 for a Lion King OST.. Blame Canada from the South Park movie was a nominee, and lost to Phil Collins. For the next few years their hatred for Phil Collins showcased in the show is just.. bordering on middle school drama.. from two grown ass men.

-pettiness pt 2. You might of heard that South Park has had a total of 5 episodes pulled over it’s lifespan.. and you wanna know WHY? It’s because Trey and Matt kept fucking with the SAME concept.. the episode Super Best Friends aired back in 2001 and featured a depiction of the Muslim prophet Muhammad. Now the episode got pulled because of this, and now you won’t find it anywhere aside from pirate sites. They probably should have stopped after this point, knowing that this is a threat to their show.. but no- they then released a 2 parter special in 2006 badmouthing Family Guy and making Muhammad their center focus again. The depiction in that episode of Muhammad was censored by Comedy Central and the episodes were pulled. Great, THREE times now. Then in 2010 for their 200th episode special, they released ANOTHER two parter special titled 200 and 201.. and guess who the center focus was? And of course the animation budget for that special and the lore they dropped was pretty much all for nothing since the episodes got yanked! They also had a big spiel on censorship at the end of the episode that ironically got censored out by Comedy Central. It’s just so babyish to KEEP going even if they KNEW what their fate was gonna be..

-pettiness pt 3. In more recent news, EVERYONE is tired of Randy.. Randy opened a weed farm In an episode from April 2018.. and he is still running the weed farm currently! A little over 6 years this joke has been going, and ppl are pretty obviously sick of it.. now in the Streaming Wars specials, that aired in 2022, Randy “snapped out” of his weed phase, and spent most of the episode apologizing to people “about the weed stuff”… now at the end of the episode, he had to go back into weed mode for some reason I forget, and then he went back to continue running the farm. This just shows that they know everyone is tired of Randy and his weed bs, but they just don’t care! And find poking fun at the fan’s irritation.

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6. Now, If I raised ANY of these issues I have to the southpark fandom, I’d prolly get called a pussy snowflake and be told to not watch the show! “You can’t like the show without liking the creators!” Watch me hoe.

Now, I’m not saying I necessarily hate the show, clearly I’m a SP fan! and there ARE things to love about the show!… but there’s just a lot of things to hate about it too.. and to see if a fan is willing to bring up the many flaws and issues with the program that there are, really proves if they’re a mature adult or not.

Trey and Matt were trailblazers in the entertainment industry back in 1999 and I think they’re still chasing that high, and haven’t ever quite been able to get it again since the early 2000s back when they had original ideas.

Clearly they were successful in their treck through the entertainment industry.. they’re both millionaires now!

A lot of the issues I currently have with the show kinda just stem from it going on too long. South Park is over and has been over for a long time.. and the current fans of this show and the current direction it’s been heading in for the past 7 years is truly incredible! It’s just so bad it’s incredible!

South Park will always have a special place in a ton of people’s hearts, and that’s not a bad thing by any means.. I grew up on the show, as did a lot of other people, and Trey and Matt have been really sweet to their staff and fans, like the Mr. Hanky’s Christmas Classics episode had a tribute to one of their main voice actors Mary K. Bergman who died back in 1999, and that can get anyone teary! But there’s two sides to every coin.. no one can be perfect, and any show can be ripped a new one if it goes on long enough.. I haven’t watched a single episode of Simpsons and even I can see how far that’s gone downhill!

So I guess expecting a show to stay good forever is unrealistic.. but god, hire better writers if you’re gonna keep pushing onward.

South Park overall is a good show, with a lot of good concepts and ideas they’ve been able to bring to light over the years.. but god, it can get annoying with how many bad apples there are.. and some of them can just be so bad that they sour the show forever.. (cough cough, Mr. Garrison’s Fancy New Vagina cough cough)

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So yeah!! Hope you enjoyed my general thoughts :)) congrats if you made it to the end! I always have too much to say ab this show!! And sorry this came so late! I’ve been busy for a minute :) hope you have a good one!!

when I say "I don't really watch many shows" what I actually mean is "the only TV show I want to talk to you about is freaks and geeks, the Simpsons on occasion, and maybe South Park but not in a good way"

[lupically]

#FEF5F1 | DILUC RAGNVINDR.

genre | fluff

word count | 1825

warning | none

note | i finally wrote something for my top husbando :’)

it came to you as a surprise that diluc, at all, sleeps.

there has always been this fantasy version of him in your head, a fantasy that lacked the great ideals and bright adventures most fantasy novels you have read consisted of. in contrast, your fantasy of him was insulting and otherworldly at best—someone restricted to the rules, a personality as plain as a dull purple doormat, a total stick in the mud that kills joy at the mere sight of it, an emotionless robot that has no use for human necessity such as the bathing and sleeping.

does diluc even need to consume food? you have literally never seen him eat or drink anything before. has he ever taken off his gloves to pick up a hamburger—oh, archons, you just realized now that you have never seen the skin of his hands before. he always has gloves on! was it to hide something?

"oh, wow," you exclaimed lowly to yourself as you leaned forward to examine the hands of the very annoyed red-haired man before you. your long-term question was finally answered. "fascinating... so you do have hands!"

diluc spared not even a glance toward the limb you were so interestedly staring at. he kept quiet for a moment and peered down at you from his bed, one leg propped up and the other stretched out—a rather awkward position he had no time to get out of after he almost burned you alive for sneaking into his bedroom in the winery.

"what drunk wind blew your incompetent self here?" he asked, ignoring your remarks about his lack of real and human hands. whatever you meant by that? you were always spilling weird things out of your mouth, you might even be worse than venti, he reckoned. 

you glared up at him after hearing his mindless insult. you were only fifty percent sure (which was already a lot in your book!) diluc never actually meant those hurtful words, that they simply fly out of his mouth due to his weird need to make sure everyone around him knew that he leaves no room for unnecessary sentiment. 

being kind blatantly was not his thing, and he has no intention of being applauded for being a decent person. why that was, you couldn't be sure. you had your assumptions, but kaeya turned out far too different than diluc that you weren’t sure if you should put your finger on the assumption. you also didn't dare dive deeper into it because (a) you just weren’t invested enough, and (b) by then, it would be a family business you would hate to indulge yourself with.

"kaeya dared me to take a picture of your sleeping face in exchange for some wine. our good friend, the honorary knight's smaller friend also wanted it as a possible blackmail souvenir," you told him honestly.

diluc immediately murmured something you couldn't quite hear, but he looked more confused than annoyed when he glared down at the mattress of his bed. he grumbled something along the lines of how the roles were definitely reversed. you didn't press further about that.

"if that is what you came here for, your best bet is to leave the way you came," he said after a moment, pointing a cold hand toward his bedroom window. "you're not taking any pictures of me."

you snorted, holding up your kamera and tapping the lenses. “uh, i think i came pretty close to taking a picture of you sleeping, diluc.”

“i had woken up the second you walked through my bedroom door. you could never,” he said.

you hummed under your breath, eyeing him suspiciously. he was probably telling the truth. he barely struggled in surprise when he grabbed your hands in the dark; was it pure luck that he perfectly found where your kamera was on the first try or does diluc secretly has night vision? your guess was as good as the unknown. 

not to mention, he looked normal, just like someone who may be in the know of your intrusion. he appeared grumpy but that was just his normal state. you could barely get him out of a frown even if you pay him, mainly because he wouldn’t need your money, but also because he was stubbornly against smiling, it appeared. 

"you know, i was surprised at first. i didn't know you sleep at all! i always thought you kind of just shut down, or maybe you have stayed awake all your life," you said with a shrug, and when he deadpanned at you, you defensively waved your kamera around. "i'm sorry! i just–you don't strike me as a person who sleeps!"

"so dead, then?" diluc asked calmly, although there was very little calmness in his facial expressions, especially those judgemental eyes of his.

"not dead! just... not really human–" you paused and pressed your lips together, thinking back to what you said to him and realizing that he might have a point. then you turned to him. "you also eat, right?"

“are you leaving or not?” he asked, a hint of flare in his voice that if you looked closely, you may see fire emerging from his body.

being stubborn as ever, and knowing that diluc would never really hurt anybody he knew to be good people, you feigned thoughtfulness for a second. tapping your finger against your chin, you scrunched your nose and shook your head. setting the kamera lumine forcefully had to borrow you between your crossed legs, you flashed him a mischievous grin. 

“no,” you said. “i am getting that picture out of you!”

“like i said,” he said, “you will never.”

“fine! then i guess i will just have to sit here and wait for you to fall asleep on me,” you said, slapping your hand down on his soft mattress. “don’t try to force me out of here! i will make it way worse for you!”

diluc furrowed his brows, wondering if you meant what you said. when his questioning gaze couldn’t get even an ounce of budge from you, he could only sigh in frustration. if you planned to sit on his bed until he doze off, then you would definitely make it worse if he tries to dump you out of his bedroom through whatever means you could.

he may be a skilled swordsman and a vision bearer, but unfortunately, he was not immune to bullshits from the likes of you.

diluc closed his eyes to savor the tiniest bit of sleep he managed to get before he heard your extra loud footsteps creeping around his room. he was supposed to get a good night's sleep, which was something he hasn't had in a while because of all the business schedules and his side vigilante job.

he was supposed to rest tonight, and there came you.

there always comes you.

dilly-dally, unpredictable, the epitomie of 'knights of favonius... always so inefficient,' letting klee out of solitary confinement and causing a ruckus amongst the responsible adults kind of irresponsible, has paid for his wine at least a zero number of time kind of broke, and was just always here to ruin his mood at the tavern every single day. 

most of the time, diluc thought about you in a negative light, much like he did with everyone around him and the entirety of the knights of favonius. but there was a version of you in his head that painted you as somebody different—somebody respectful, somebody worth keeping around...

somebody he likes, perhaps.

after all, joy was never prevalent in his life. it used to be, but that was a past he has long forgotten the details of. even if he wanted to remember them now, he could only remember snippets that wouldn’t guarantee him a good nostalgia. he may just end up feeling worse at the end. the only constant influx of distraction he has now seemed to be either you or venti, and with the godly bard as his other option, he would much rather choose you. 

but it was not because that venti was too hard to confine in. you were just as hard to talk about problems with considering your optimism and fickle attitude. 

what diluc wanted was permanence; a train that never stops, a bottle of wine that continuously refills, dandelions that do not stop flying even after it reaches celestia. and venti was too understanding and abstract to be one. as interesting of a character he may be, venti knew when to leave people alone. or, occasionally, he just cared too little. after all the city of mondstadt didn’t lack a god because he was responsible. 

you, though. diluc could never pinpoint if you were as dense as you appeared to be, or if you did know how to read the room and simply chose to ignore it, but you never leave people alone. you never left him alone; you unknowingly pick a petty one-sided argument with him all the time, you get drunk at the tavern and somehow has never let anybody take you home but him, you barge into his bedroom in the middle of the night because of some stupid dare his brother made you do and you still refuse to leave despite being sleepy.

you give him a way out, whether he likes it or not.

arms crossed in front of his chest, he deadpanned as he watched your head drop lower and lower to the mattress. soon enough, you were snoring away on his bed with the gadget discarded by your feet. he watched you in silence, your cheek smushed against the surface and the intensity you always radiated lessening from your body. you looked normal now; not energetic, not talkative. just sleeping peacefully, the way he always made sure you were after carrying you home. 

diluc’s heart was finally softening under the knowledge that nobody was watching him anymore. the pessimistic monster that often emerges from him was still here, but in the face of you, it has painted itself pink and it has forgotten vengeance and retribution. in the face of you, it has been dragged out from the death it once laid and became forgiven. 

carefully laying your head down on the pillow, diluc draped the blanket over your shoulder to tuck you into his bed. after making sure you were fine and well, he placed the kamera on the desk in the room, somewhere visible you could find once you wake up, and he left for one of the guest rooms in the mansion. 

tonight was the first time in a while when he has forgotten about all the problems he’s had. something that wasn’t about wine, the family business, or the abyss order. it wasn’t the rest he wanted, perhaps it was hardly any rest at all, but he was glad he got to think about something else.

of course, diluc would never tell you that.

[whump-a-la-mode]

I am once again asking for continuation to hero breaking villain out of prison and comfort for the villain

After so much hurt, I definitely agree that Villain deserves some comfort! I got two requests for this as well.

I might respond to this one from @starnight-whump separately though-- I'm loving writing comfort for our poor Villain! For now, they're getting some much needed physical affection.

This is a continuation from here. Part two is here and part one is here.

CW//Past trauma, medical exams, touch aversion, screaming

It was a horrible decision.

Of course it had been a horrible decision. Going to the prison in the first place had been a horrible decision, so had accepting Leader's offer to 'view' one of their caged up zoo animals. The whole night had been a series of one mistake after another.

And now...

Now Hero stood outside an apartment door, chest fluttering with a mix of nerves and embarrassment, the likes of which they had not felt for a very, very long time. A half-limp body was tucked against their chest, weak hands gripping their shirt like a lifeline. That was the only thing Villain had done for the whole walk here-- held onto Hero's shirt, head buried in their shoulder.

With a nervous flick of their tongue over their lips, Hero reached forth, knocking on the door. Villain shifted and struggled as the extra support was removed, but calmed once more when Hero wrapped their arm back around them.

For a few moments, there was silence.

Silence as dead as that that they had been surrounded by upon escaping the vicinity of the prison. The pregnant pause of indecision.

Of course, it had been Hero's first instinct to head home. To return to their bedroom, return to where they had been before their life had been turned upon its head. There was enough room was Villain, enough food and water, assuming they still understood what those were.

But... That wasn't an option. Leader may have been a monster, but they weren't stupid. Hero's apartment is the first place they would look. If they brought Villain there, they may as well already have been recaptured.

So, Hero had come up with a Plan B.

The doorknob turned, the door nervously being drawn open.

"Hero?"

If they had had the free hand to do so, Hero would have waved, but they didn't want to risk Villain squirming around again.

So, instead, they decided to reply like an awkward idiot.

"Uh, long time no see?"

"Yyyes. Come in, come in. We can't talk out here."

Doctor retreated within their apartment, Hero hot on their heels. The door was quickly closed behind, the nervous doctor securing a number of custom-installed locks upon it.

The smell of the apartment hadn't changed one bit. A fog of heavy nostalgia threatened to take over Hero's brain. How many times had they staggered in here after a battle, before there was an Organization, before there were any real doctors to help? More times than they could count, certainly.

"Sit." Doctor insisted, and Hero certainly wasn't about to refuse. They settled onto a worn, beige sofa, dark spots showing where blood stains refused to be washed out.

Villain gripped Hero's shirt tighter.

"Okay." The doctor took a deep breath before exhaling. There was no frustration in their voice-- there never was-- but nerves made their vocal chords strain just the same. There was warmth in their expression, joy at seeing an old friend, but it was overcast. "Please don't tell me you did something stupid."

"I may have done something stupid."

"Okay. How stupid?" Doctor blinked, not waiting for an answer, before their gaze shifted to Villain. "I assume it has to do with them?"

"Yyyeah."

"What did you do?"

"I may have broken them out of prison."

A pause.

"You broke them out of prison."

"Yeah."

"I was honestly expecting something worse. That's still bad, but... Are you hurt? Are they hurt?"

"I'm fine." Hero shook their head. "As for them, I'm not sure. I haven't looked."

"Then... I mean, I'm glad you're here, but what do you need my help with?"

"I think something is wrong with them."

"Hm." Doctor hummed, gaze turning once more to Villain. "Hey, bud, what's your name?"

Nothing.

"What's your name, bud?"

Villain did not so much as twitch.

"There's something wrong with them." Hero dipped their head.

"Are they asleep?"

"No? Well, I don't think so."

"What exactly is wrong with them?"

Hero bit their lip, hand stroking along Villain's tense back. What was wrong with them? A lot of things, clearly, but what specifically? They didn't seem drugged, and they were clearly conscious, but their behavior was anything but normal.

"Um... Well, they've been locked in a soundless prison cell, alone, for over a year."

"Oh. Oh, shit."

"Which I assume is pretty bad."

"Yes, it's bad. Really, really bad."

Hero's hand stopped mid-stroke, pressing reassuringly into Villain's shoulder.

"Can you help them?" The words came out as a breathless whisper.

"I can try."

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Doctor's exam room was probably the last thing anyone would have expected to see in a tiny inner-city apartment.

It wasn't completely sterile, not like one would expect in a real hospital. The carpet had been replaced by tile, but the wallpaper and ceiling remained the same as the rest of the apartment. The metal exam table in the center contained no fancy gadgets, consisting of little more than a stainless steel slab and a pillow wrapped in plastic. At the very least, the cupboards and hanging pieces of medical equipment provided some sense of authenticity to the setup.

"We're going to need to get them onto the table." Doctor nodded, strolling into the room before shutting the door behind themself. "Do you think they can sit up on their own?"

"They were earlier."

"Then put them on the table, please. I'll need to get a better look."

Hero nodded. The limp body they carried did not seem to react to the words. They seemed so comfortable, so desperate to stay in their grasp-- but Doctor knew what they were talking about.

Prying Villain off of their shirt was an effort in and of itself. Once their grip was finally released, they hung in the air like dead weight, allowing themself to be placed on the table without fight. Not that they were aware enough to struggle-- their eyes still sat blank, like staring back at a piece of taxidermy.

"Can you see the problem?" Hero asked impatiently.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean... They're acting so weird. There's gotta be something wrong with them, right? Did they hit their head? I don't see a bruise..."

Doctor looked to Hero. Why was there such pity in their gaze?

"Hero..." They exhaled. "Physically, your friend here looks fine. They could benefit from putting on a bit more weight, but otherwise..."

"They're not hurt?"

"No."

"Then..."

"Whatever is going on with them, it's in their mind. Hero, who is this?"

"It was Villain. One of the villains."

"And they were alone for so long."

Hero nodded feebly.

"Is there some kind of... some kind of medicine? Or treatment? To wake them up? To make them themself again?"

"No. No, Hero." A pitied shake of the head. "This isn't sickness. This isn't injury. This is trauma."

"Someone hurt them?"

"The opposite. Being that isolated for that long, it does something to the brain."

"They..."

"This happened slowly." This time, Doctor nodded, as though answering a question Hero hadn't even known they had. "Over months, probably. Solitude and silence, it broke them."

That was what Villain was. Not hurt, not injured, not sick. Broken. The very core of them, shattered into nothing, and without a single wound being inflicted.

They were staring at Hero. Almost. Their eyes were positioned in that direction, but they weren't looking at anything at all. There was simply nothing there.

"Can we fix it?" That was what mattered. Villain had been broken-- were there enough pieces left to put them back together again?

"We can try. But that's not going to be quick. Putting them back together, helping them, it's going to be no quicker a process than that which broke them in the first place. Right now, we need to make sure that, physically, they're okay."

"Mhm." Hero nodded, the reality of the situation beginning to sink in in all its terrible detail. "What first?"

"Medical exam. If no one has looked at them in a year... Well, we need to do that."

"Okay. What then?"

"Then, we give them a bath. And some fresh clothes. They smell terrible. But right now, I need to make sure they're okay. Keep them on the table."

"I don't think they're going anywhere soon."

"Fair." Doctor turned, rolling a metal stand out from the corner, a monitor on its top and a plastic cuff hanging from it. They positioned the blood pressure monitor next to the table, undoing the cuff and holding it in one hand. With the other, they gripped Villain's wrist-

The screaming was somehow louder this time, loud enough to make the doctor leap back in surprise. A moment after they removed their hand, it stopped, leaving Villain sobbing and gasping for breath.

Doctor looked to Hero wordlessly.

"They did that when I first touched them too. I think they're just scared. It's okay, Villain." They tried to coax. "Try again."

The doctor bit their lip, but obliged, moving forward to again place their hand-

It was a more shrill shriek, this time, like that of a dying seal.

"Okay. Okay." Doctor breathed, hands outstretched in a defensive position. "Can.. Will they let you touch them?"

Hero tentatively reached forth, a hand upon Villain's wrist. The only reaction they were met with was that of a slight twitch.

"Well." Doctor muttered. "Then there's only one way we can do this."

"What?"

"You're going to have to play doctor."

"I'm not-"

"I know. I'll guide you through it. Put the blood pressure cuff on."

"Are you sure about this?"

"What matters most is their health. What matters second most is their comfort. If this is the way they want it done, we'll do it."

Hero nodded. "Where does the cuff go?"

"Upper arm. Make sure its tight enough to stay on, but not too tight."

It was just a cuff, right? It couldn't be that hard. They took the blood pressure cuff in hand, wrapping it taut around Villain's upper arm. They twitched, but did not protest.

The machine buzzed, the cuff inflating until the surrounding parts of Villain's skin grew red. Hero felt their heart flutter, as though they should help, before the machine made a satisfied noise and released its hold.

"It's high." Doctor reported. "But within a normal range. They're scared, but not sick."

"What next?"

"Eyes. I can probably do that, it doesn't involve direct touch."

Doctor positioned themself before Villain, a small light in hand. They leaned forward, but did not touch their patient.

The light was raised to Villain's eye. For a moment, they were still, before a whimper tore itself from their throat. They closed their eyes, looking ever so slightly away as they wrapped their arms around themself.

"Hey, hey." Hero didn't even notice that they were shoving the doctor out of the way until they'd already done so. "Sorry."

"It's fine."

"Villain, it's okay. It's okay. I'm right here."

Villain opened their eyes-- for the first time, they truly opened their eyes. Wide pupils looked at Hero, quivering lips seeming as though they wanted to speak. Instead, Villain raised their arms, weakly grasping for the person before them.

Hero obliged, picking them up with ease and holding them to their chest. They relaxed in a moment.

"Uh, Doctor?" Hero flushed. "Is it okay if they spend the rest of the exam in my lap?"

Doctor bit their lip, but nodded.

"If that's what will make them the most comfortable. Hold them still, let's check their hearing next."

Hero nodded their agreement, turning Villain around so that they faced towards the doctor. With a gentle hand in their hair, they whispered:

"This is only gonna take a minute, I promise. Then you're gonna get a bath and be all warm and clean. Just hold still for me, okay?"

Villain whimpered, and leaned closer to their new caretaker.

[keiyoomi]

▸ title: the proposal ▸ details: 1.3k+ words | s. kiyoomi × reader | slight angst, fluff ending ▸ note: rewritten version of this fic which i wrote when this blog was still new. lmk what you think about it! hihi. ah, and as usual, unedited.

“You’re not avoiding her, right?” Komori asked after reading the message that you’ve sent him. “Don’t tell me this is still about—”

“—I don’t know how to do it, when to do it, and where to do it.” Sakusa unconsciously nipped the tip of his finger. “I want it to be perfect. To be grand, yet intimate. I want everyone to hear how much I love her and how important she is to me.”

“And you’re avoiding her because. . .?”

Sakusa sighed. “I might end up proposing on the spot.”

Komori stared at the television where they were watching their previous matches. An idea crossed his mind after watching the video clip wherein his cousin made numerous service aces followed by the spectacular reactions of MSBY’s fans. “I know when and where’s the perfect time and place for you to propose.”

⚭

You were nervous, to say the least.

From the moment Komori picked you up from your place, until he made you sit near the courtside along with several family and/or friends of the other players present, you couldn’t seem to calm your nerves.

Not when you haven’t seen your boyfriend in person for more than a month. No text messages, no video calls, hell, even the emails you’ve sent were blatantly ignored. You even tried to visit his place to check on him, but he wasn’t there whenever you visited.

You were dying to know the reason why he’s doing this because you’re sure that you haven’t done anything that would cause any drama in your relationship.

Rumors about him dating an influencer were peacefully discussed and fixed. He easily solved your problem with your officemate who’s shamelessly flirting with you.

So, why is he avoiding you now?

Why now when you’ve finally learned how to handle each other and how to respect each other’s boundaries?

Why now when you two could easily discuss numerous issues just to avoid any unnecessary conflicts?

You roamed your eyes around the arena and looked for anyone you knew, or probably knew you. But you couldn’t even see Osamu who was standing behind his food stall earlier.

“What the hell is happening here?” you wondered. Soon after, the lights went out and you don’t have the slightest idea of what’s about to happen. Neither the fans of both Adlers and Jackals who watched the monsters’ generation’s rematch in person.

Amidst the confusion, a familiar tune began to play in the background earning a mixture of shrieks and cheers from the fans. “Welcome to MSBY’s channel! This is Hinata Shoyo and—”

“—Sakusa Kiyoomi.” Hearing his muffled voice reminded you of that day when you first met each other. Back when he deliberately approached Karasuno’s team while waiting for your turn to play. Back when he asked for your name without caring about the people watching his every move.

You sighed and smiled upon hearing the lifeless response of your boyfriend, contrary to Hinata’s bubbly way of introducing himself. Sakusa was wearing his MSBY face mask, one that was sold out as soon as it hit the market recently.

“Today we’ll be able to know more about Sakusa-san.” Shoyo threw one of the cards he was holding somewhere in the room earning a glare from Sakusa. It was noticeable how Shoyo winced upon feeling his senpai’s sharp gaze. “Few days ago, there was a poll on twitter. We’ve asked our fans—your fans—for their input. The result of that poll was surprising, at least according to Miya-san.”

“My poll didn’t even reach that number!” You giggled upon hearing Atsumu complain. Everyone in that room—the members of MSBY, you guessed—laughed at his complaint earning more whines from the blond setter.

“Three-fourths of the total number of those who voted wanted to know more about your love life.” Shoyo looked at Sakusa with hesitation. “Will that be—?”

“Y/N is fine with that.”

Blush crept on your cheeks upon hearing his response. Hearing MSBY’s supporters cheering and whistling made you feel more shy than you already are. “What the hell is happening here?”

“First question, when did you first meet L/N-san?”

“Before our match during the Spring Tournament.” He looked at the bubbly wing spiker with deep frown. “Can you not pretend that you didn’t know when it happened?”

“I-I’m not pretending or anything, Sakusa-san!” Hinata responded, clearly startled by the response from your boyfriend. You shook your head at Hinata’s reaction though. It was as if he was caught lying on the spot by someone.

Well, Sakusa wasn’t entirely wrong though. You were helping Hinata with his warm-up exercises when Sakusa Kiyoomi approached your group. You, to be exact.

A sudden rush of nostalgia flooded your system. It’s been a long time since your relationship with the “snobbish, germaphobe” blossomed into something wonderful. Something that you’d like to protect and take care of for your entire lifetime.

Hinata cleared his throat before reading the next q-card. “Next question—”

“If it’s about our first date, it was in Tokyo. When your team was invited by Nekoma. When and where did she agree to become my girlfriend, when our team visited yours, just before we graduate.” Then, you noticed that glint in his eyes whenever he’s teasing someone. “Karasuno didn’t even notice that one of their beloved managers went out.”

Hinata looked flustered upon hearing the response from your boyfriend. “Uh. . . Sakusa-san, when did you realize that she’s the one?”

You waited for his response, but instead of hearing his reply, the music playing in the background played louder than his voice. “What? Come on!” you complained, earning snickers from the people surrounding you.

Then, the lights were switched on.

Your jaw dropped when you saw the members of MSBY holding a letter. Sakusa was kneeling on top of a black yoga mat in front of his team members, hands holding a black velvet box with a shiny ring inside. Tears clouded your vision, but after reading the whole sentence, you laughed at the words formed.

‘MARRY ME WILL YOU?’

With shaky legs, you approached Sakusa and cupped his face before kissing his lips. He hasn’t voiced out the question yet, but you’re sure as hell with your answer. It doesn’t even matter if Bokuto and Atsumu’s group jumbled the words. What matters most is you and that man kneeling in front of you.

“Should I still ask you the question?”

With teary eyes you nodded your head while giggling. “Only if you’ll say their question out loud.”

His eyebrows furrowed before looking at the men behind him.

You could hear him curse at his teammates, somewhere along the lines of ‘stupid Atsumu.’

He, then, looked up at you. Eyes were begging, probably for you to drop the jumbled words made by his team, and you did.

“Y/N, you’re the most precious person I’ve ever met in my entire life. I am more than willing to tolerate your personality, but I do appreciate it if you’ll minimize your interaction with Atsumu—”

“Kiyoomi!”

“I’m always looking forward to our adventures together and I would never get tired of you and your weird habits. As long as our kids don’t get your worst quirks—”

“Sakusa Kiyoomi!”

He chuckled. “I’m kidding,” he responded before kissing the back of your hand. “Will you allow me to become the happiest man in this place today? To be your lawfully wedded husband and to be the father of your future children?”

You nodded your head, unable to form any words at the moment. He slipped the ring on your finger before scooping you up and twirling you, earning cheers from everyone inside that gym.

“You still have to explain why you avoided me for a month, okay?” you whispered against his ear.

“And here I thought I’m off the hook.”

“Mmhmm. You wish.”

[pearl-blue-musings]

Never Been Kissed: Hizashi Yamada

HI I’M ON A ROLL

so this combines NYE and Valentine’s Day soooo yeah

Pairing: Hizashi Yamada x fem!reader

~~~~~~~~~~

Conflicting schedules had always been a problem in your relationship, but it never stopped either of you. Sure you had made plans with your boyfriend for your first Valentine’s together, but plans always change.

Your work hours got shifted around again.

He had to work extra hours at the radio station because someone else requested time off. It was always something.

But that’s how the two of you worked.

You knew being in a relationship with the radio hero and teacher Present Mic would me taxing, whether emotionally or mentally. It was hard dealing with his early mornings and late nights, but you persevered. You just thought that maybe you’d be able to spend time with him on a day that meant a lot to him. You weren’t too surprised that he really and truly loved this day. With how loud he shows his emotions, you figured this holiday was perfect for him.

But his softs were always the most serene softs you’d ever experienced. Everyone knew Present Mic, but few knew Hizashi Yamada. And you were one of the lucky few to know him. You knew him not just as a person and hero, you knew him intimately. I mean, of course you did, you’ve been together for over a year! Like the cheesy man you know him to be, he had planned it out all perfectly during a New Years Eve show. You had been on a few dates but nothing had been official, so you were surprised he had invited you to see him do his show. He had wanted to spend the holiday with you but had to work so he thought, why not both?

The night was going swimmingly, filled with laughter and nostalgia as he recounted events that had happened all the while playing incredible music tied with great stories either from him or his little listeners. You were in awe, seeing him in his element and thriving; it was a sight to behold. Hizashi was like a siren and you were the unsuspecting victim and it was honestly a sensation you wanted to happen more and more.

Midnight was a second away and he had begun the count down be saying various quotes and well wishes for the new year. You were simply enjoying yourself when it was down to the final 30 seconds and he spoke up.

“Alright little listeners the time has come! Just under 20 seconds until the new year! Grab your sweetheart, your best friend, your pet, and give em a smooch at the count of zero! And don’t worry,” he looks over to you at the 10 second mark and announces, you think, only to you. “I’ve got my girlfriend here to kiss so no kisses from you all to me, ya dig?”

He leaves his desk, clicking the right settings to mute himself so he can whisper to you. “What do you say? Be my girlfriend?”

You’re stunned and just nod frantically, unsure of what to do as you saw zero approach on the clock. Hizashi unmutes his mic and safely yells, “Happy New Year!” before quickly muting and bringing you into sweet kiss. He tasted like mint chocolate and the thought sent shivers down your spine.

It was weird to you that this year was going to be your first Valentine’s Day together, despite being in a relationship for a year. The previous year he had to work and you had a family emergency, so he knew to not push it onto you. But this year Hizashi wanted to spoil you like the queen he knows you are.

But Present Mic always had his late night Valentine’s show that was a hit and he couldn’t miss it.

When he told you, you smiled nicely and told him it was okay. And it really was! You weren’t too big on the holiday yourself but you knew he was. On the day, you woke up to an array of flowers and cute little love notes left all over your room. You giggled to yourself as you walked into the kitchen, knowing he was already at U.A., and you see something boxed up on the counter.

Hey baby girl!

I made your favorite early this morning, but I’m sad I can’t eat it with you! I can’t wait to see you tonight my songbird!

Your Hizashi

If it was possible to love this man more than you already do, then this might’ve been the tipping point. You were overjoyed at his little acts of love that he showed you, knowing he won’t be coming in until practically midnight and it made your heart flutter.

At the end of your work day, you had already gotten a few text messages and calls from him reminding you that he loves you so much. And when you got to your newly shared apartment, you were greeted by a gigantic teddy bear with balloons and another card.

Sweet baby,

I didn’t mean to check your browser history but I know this little, well big, guy has been on your mind for a bit. But check what he has in his paw! I’ll see you later tonight baby!

Your Hizashi

You’re relieved no one saw the happy and flustered dance you did outside your apartment door as you shuffle in all the items your doting boyfriend bought you. Once your shoes are off and you’re more adjusted, you open the envelope. “What!?” You yelled to no one.

He had gotten you tickets to a spa and hot springs for a whole weekend?! And it’s the one you’ve been dying to go to? You quickly dial his number.

“My favorite listener!”

“You’re gonna kill me Hizashi! I-I mean, the spa, the food, everything! God, I love you.”

You hear him sigh and hum contentedly. “Anything for my lovebird! And there’s one more surprise, but you have to be listening to the show at exactly 8:55 okay?”

You nod into the phone and tell him you love him again before hanging up. You were positive you had all the ingredients for his favorite meal and dessert and you couldn’t wait to make it for him and have it ready for when he comes home. The first time you had made dinner for him after a late night radio show was one of the softest and happiest you had seen him. And in turn when you’ve had late shifts he’s done the same for you.

You had decided to wait until later to make his food, so you watched a couple movies and ate some leftovers to tide you over before making your special meal. You knew it would take about an hour for everything to be ready and since he comes home around 9:30 these nights you began your meal prep around 8:30.

25 minutes later you tuned into his show while taking a break to change your clothes and put on a robe. While you were changing you heard his voice coming in loud and clear.

“Listeners, it’s almost time for me to go but I have a quick story, okay? Over a year ago, I asked my beautiful wonderful girlfriend to be mine and she said yes! We even had our first New Years Kiss then! We’ve been together ever since, but this is our first Valentine’s together. And you all know how much I love this holiday!

“Her father had passed away the week before so we didn’t do anything. I was honestly afraid to express how much I love this day but she constantly reassured me that it was okay. And so I waited, ya dig?”

You almost dropped whatever was in your hands at hearing him through your speaker. What, just what is he doing?

“So this year, I’ve gone all out! But everything I did, I kept her and her family in mind! I sent her mom and grandmother everything I had given her today! My girlfriend didn’t know that but now she does! She’s really the best, you know? She’s even supporting me working today and everyday! I couldn’t have asked for a better gift than her. And I know today is hard for her, but that’s why I gotta pump it up for her!

“I love you, sweetie, and I can’t wait to see you when I get home.”

Hizashi was more than eager to make it back to his apartment where he knew the love of his life was waiting. His show was more tiring than usual but he knew he could endure it for you. He had already washed his hair and changed clothes at the station before coming home. Before entering, he could already smell the food you had made and his mouth began to salivate.

He presses his way into the apartment, and was thrown off. You weren’t in the kitchen. The table was set with candles and the food but where were you? He hopes you’re not upset over what he did or worse yet, crying because of your father. “Baby girl?” He asks the air, but is relieved when he hears you respond from your bedroom. “I didn’t see you in the kitchen or at the table so I got concerned because I-“

Rarely is Present Mic left speechless.

Rarely is Hizashi Yamada left speechless.

But here he is, stunned into silence at seeing you, donned in what he dubs the sexiest lingerie he’s ever seen. Sitting on your bed, no kneeling, so he can see all of your body covered in lace.

You whisper out while your own hands roam your body. “Happy Valentine’s Day, baby.

“Come unwrap your gift.”

~~~~~~~~~

@cupcake-rogue @spicy-spooder

[painsthegame]

Whump-themed Character Number Meme

So, last night I was reminiscing about the peak era of Deviantart back in like 2013 and I came across some of these little “character number memes” I used to fill out for fun. I remember always looking for whump-themed ones and not being able to find any, so in the spirit of nostalgia I decided to make one myself!

For those of you who haven’t seen one of these before, it’s basically a little prompt list that you fill out using randomized characters. Without looking at the questions beforehand, you assign a character to each number at the top. It works best if the characters are all from the same source/universe. Then, you go through each prompt or question and replace the number with the corresponding character and viola! You’ve got some weird prompts/scenes to think about or try and write out!

My favorites were always the ones that followed some sort of storyline so maybe I’ll make one of those later if people enjoy this one. But for now, here’s a loose collection of random scenes. Feel free to write them out or use them however you like. You don’t have to use the randomization mechanic if you don’t want to (though I found that it challenges how I think about certain characters and their relationships which is always cool) and remember to have fun :) I’d love to see what y’all make of it.

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

[2], [3], and [6] are lost in a cave together. A wall collapses, leaving [3] pinned under rocks in a small space with [2] and [6] blocked off from them on the other side. There is hole through the wall only big enough to pass through something the size of a flashlight. How do they get out of it?

[7] falls down a flight of concrete stairs, where [1] later finds them struggling.

[4] is attacked by a mage whose powers allow them to fight someone using their greatest fears. How do they try to defeat [4]?

[1] and [5] are brainwashed and instructed to fight each other. What happens? Can [3] snap them out of it in time, or do the other two turn on them?

[5] is a robot in dire need of repairs before they shut down. Who do they go to for help?

A villain has captured [1] and [3] and are forcing [4] to choose which one lives and which one dies.

[2] is now being tormented by someone from their past.

The apocalypse occurred recently and survival is extremely difficult for the small amount of people who were left alive. The first living person [5] encounters after the event is [7], and now they must work together.

[6] gets drafted.

A mob boss or other villainous criminal with plenty of resources to spare is now after [2].

When [3] loses their memory, [1] and [6] are in charge of helping them regain it.

A villain kidnapped [5] and is making them choose which limb they’d like to have amputated.

[4] sees [2] having a horrible nightmare.

[3] is the only one there to comfort [7] after a traumatic experience. How does that go?

[4] is kidnapped and held for ransom. The kidnapper sends a ransom video to both [6] and [7].

[3] hasn’t slept in 3 days. Who notices?

[5] gets their leg stuck in a bear trap.

As gladiators, [6] and [2] are forced to battle to the death in the colosseum before a raving crowd. [7] is watching from the sidelines, knowing they are next in line to fight the winner.

[4], [1], [6], and [3] are robbing a bank. A trap is set for them and [1] gets shot.

[5] is secretly a medium, and thus is the only one who can see the spiteful spirit that has been haunting [4].

[1] and [7] get into a brutal car accident.

[2] is poisoned with food meant for [6].

[1] has been having dreams about [5] that always seem to come true. What happens when they start having dreams of [5] dying a horrible death?

[2], [3], and [7] are in prison. [1], [4], and [5] are trying to help them escape.

During said escape, [7] gets stabbed. Can they make it out in time?

That’s all I have for the time being, I hope you all can have some fun with this. I had fun making it :)

[buckybarnesthehotshot]

iv: i hate you but i’m too tired for this shit (bucky barnes x reader)

i hate you but masterlist

summary: bucky and y/n can’t stand each other, but y/n needs help with her sister’s kids (enemies to lovers au)

word count: 2061

warnings: swearing, arguing, death, and this is not proofread

taglist is CLOSED

       “Do you know where y/n is?” Bucky raised a brow at Sam as he pulled a carton of milk from the now-replaced fridge.

      “Why? Are you gonna accuse her of burning the kitchen down again this time? I don’t think she burned down any kitchens today,” Sam chuckled, his gaze wandering around the newly repaired kitchen.

       “No, it’s not tha—” Bucky tried to explain, only to get interrupted by Sam breaking out in a fit of laughter.

       “Man, you’re in love with y/n! That’s why you’re always pissing her off!” Sam exclaimed excitedly, earning a smack across the shoulder from Bucky.

       “Why do you always assume people are in love with other people? Last week, you said the guy in front of us in the café was in love with the barista just because he took ten seconds longer than he was supposed to for ordering a drink,” Bucky rolled his eyes at Sam’s childish remarks.

       “You should’ve seen him! He was making heart eyes at her!” Sam exclaimed, holding his arms up in defense.

       “He was on the phone with his girlfriend, Sam!” Bucky pointed out.

       “Okay, that was a mistake on my part, but why are you looking for y/n?” Sam raised a brow at Bucky as he crossed his arms.

       “She borrowed my van four days ago and she never came back,” Bucky shrugged.

       “That’s because she went on an indefinite break from staying at the tower and all her Avengers duties. She even sent Fury an email about it,” Sam chuckled before pausing as his eyes widened, “wait, you let y/n borrow something you own?”

       “She was doing that weird thing with her eyes; you know the one she uses to get information when we’re undercover?” Bucky scratched the back of his neck, struggling to describe what exactly it was y/n did to get him to hand over his van keys.

       “You fell victim to her puppy eyes? Damn man, I thought it would take more than to get you to crack,” Sam broke out in a fit of laughter as Bucky scowled.

       “Yeah, well, she did this thing where she held onto my shoulders and started shaking me!” Bucky exclaimed defensively. Sam shook his head as his laughter slowly began dying down.

       “Man, so if HYDRA decided to capture you and gave you the puppy dog eyes, you would give up all the information they want you to give up?” Sam raised a brow at Bucky. Bucky, as though in deep thought, averted his gaze as he swiped his lip with his tongue.

       “Well, no but—”

       “Man, I should tell Fury to start looking for a replacement now,” Sam quipped.

       “All I’m asking is you know where she’s staying? I wanted to pick up a few things from the hardware store, but since y/n has my van, I can’t really do that,” Bucky questioned, pouring milk in his cereal bowl.

       “Can’t you have FRIDAY call her? Wait, she’s your teammate, you should have her number!” Sam pointed out as Bucky attempted to argue with a mouthful of cereal.

        “She banned,” Bucky paused to swallow his food before continuing, “from contacting her through FRIDAY or via her phone number.”

       “That’s all on you, Barnes,” Sam chuckled before grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge and walking away.

       “FRIDAY, can I have a location on y/n?” Bucky requested as soon as Sam was out of earshot. To Bucky, talking to someone he couldn’t see was a little weird at first. Sure, when he was in Wakanda, he’d seen Shuri do it plenty of times, but he just assumed she had someone on comms. That was why the first time FRIDAY greeted him, he was startled—and whether or not he’d admit it, he pissed his pants a little too.

       “Unfortunately, Agent l/n blocked any requests for her information,” FRIDAY explained. Bucky groaned in frustration; he just wanted his van back. Was that too much to ask for? That was when he was struck by an idea.

       “FRIDAY, can I please have a location on my van?” Bucky requested, silently praying that his van did not somehow end up in another state.

       “Your van is parked outside an apartment complex in downtown New York. Shall I send the coordinated to your mobile device?” FRIDAY questioned.

       “Yes, please,” Bucky responded as he downed down the leftover cereal milk in his bowl.

       Bucky checked his phones from any notifications from FRIDAY and there it was on his lock screen: y/n’s home address.

       “FRIDAY, set my GPS on my motorcycle to the location of my van,” Bucky requested.

       “The GPS on your motorcycle has been set,” FRIDAY responded.

       Bucky left his bowl on the counter and headed into his bedroom to grab a pair of sneakers and a pale green jacket. He stared at the dark glove on his nightstand in consideration for a moment.

       Even after he’d been pardoned for his crimes under HYDRA, people always had that underlying fear that Bucky would revert to his ways with HYDRA and the Avengers would be unable to do anything about it. Luckily for him, the people of New York only ever recognized him when his vibranium arm was on full display. After all, not that many people in New York sported a vibranium arm and a perfected scowl.

        After careful consideration, he decided to ditch the glove for the day and hope the jacket would cover up the arm the way he wanted it to. After all, he was just heading to y/n’s apartment and he would head back to the compound.

       He pulled his—well, it used to be Steve’s before the old man gifted it to him—motorcycle keys off the hooks on the wall and headed to the parking basement where he kept his beloved Harley Davidson. He mounted the bike and sped off, following the directions in which the GPS directed him through.

       A grin found its way to the super soldier’s face. He was brought back to his younger days as he and Steve rode through the busy streets of Brooklyn whenever the Howling Commandoes didn’t have any missions to partake in—which was pretty rare. He felt young and carefree as his wind blew through his dark locks.

       He remained like that for a while; in a state of nostalgia and an uncharacteristically happy grin on his face as he dashed through the busy streets. He only broke out of it upon hearing FRIDAY’s voice announcing that he was at his location; a shockingly large apartment complex.

       “Shit,” he swore upon realizing y/n would be a bit tougher to locate than he thought. He didn’t think y/n’s life outside the tower would be as glamorous or at least not boring as it was. He was, of course, proved wrong at the sight of the massive building. Did y/n live in an apartment or a condominium?

       Luckily, as Bucky entered the buildings (after having some complications with the metal detector, of course) he noticed there was a concierge stationed at the front desk. He silently prayed to whoever was listening that the lady stationed there would tell him which floor and which apartment number he could find y/n in.

       “Good morning, sir, what can I help you with?” the lady—she couldn’t have been a day over thirty—greeted Bucky, a soft smile on her face.

       “Hi, uh, I’m here for y/n l/n. Do you know what unit she’s in?” Bucky questioned, leaning closer to the desk. He didn’t want to raise his voice; the whole lobby of the complex just seemed like such a peaceful place he didn’t want to disrupt.

       “Just a moment sir,” the woman smiled before dialing a number on the telephone and speaking to who he just assumed was y/n, “She’s in unit 8E on the eight floor, sir.”

       “Thank you,” Bucky smiled as he headed into one of the thankfully empty elevators. He didn’t know why, but since his first elevator ride, he always found riding an elevator—an enclosed metal box—with a stranger filled him with unease.

       Bucky arrived at the beige-carpeted hallway of the building as he passed by the abstract paintings hung on the wall and the doors with the unit number engraved in them. A, B, C, D; he passed by them all until he reached y/n’s door. He brought his fist up to the door before realizing there was a slight racket going on from within the door.

       That was when he panicked; was his teammate in trouble? No, there would’ve been more noise if y/n really was in trouble. Of all the times he’d worked with her, y/n was known to let out a battle cry here and there whenever she got into a physical confrontation.

       He relaxed, flicking his wrist against the smooth wooden door and waiting a moment for it to swing open and reveal a very tired-looking y/n who carried a wailing toddler in her arms.

       “You’re not the gelato guy,” y/n frowned, pulling a chuckle from Bucky.

       “And there’s no way in hell you’re y/n. You didn’t tell me you had a kid!” Bucky exclaimed, shocked at what he was seeing.

       “First of all, we aren’t close enough for me to disclose that kind of information with you. Second, she’s not mine. Well, she kind of is but not really,” y/n shrugged, “wait, why are you here?”

       “You borrowed my van,” Bucky raised a brow as he crossed his arms.

       “Oh yeah, you might want to take a seat, though. I know it’s somewhere here, but the past days have been pretty hectic,” y/n chuckled dryly, stepping aside and letting Bucky into her apartment. The action itself shocked him a little. In all his days living with y/n, she’d never once invited him into her room or any room she was in whenever he needed something. On a normal day, she would’ve shut her door for a while and opened it as she chucked the item right at him before slamming the door shut again.

       Bucky took in his surroundings; y/n’s apartment looked as though it was supposed to be a peaceful place. The spacious apartment’s furnishings matched those of the compound’s, yet it all felt more like an actual home compared to the compound.   However, it didn’t take him long to realize some things were placed where they weren’t supposed to.

       There were articles of clothing on the floorboards, a toy or two there, a pack of diapers in the corner of the room, and a child wrapping his arms around a sobbing teenage girl on the couch. Wait, a child and a teenage girl? How many people did y/n live with?

        He awkwardly took a seat on one of the seats by the plush velvet sofa, trying to avert his gaze from the two on the couch near his seat. His super soldier hearing, however, betrayed him as he heard every sob and every word that fell from the teenager’s lips.

       “I just can’t believe it!” the girl sobbed, her eyes red and puffy.

       “It’s gon be okay, Livvy. Mommy’s gonna go back,” a smaller voice came to comfort her. A smile found its way to Bucky’s face as he heard the child’s attempt to comfort ‘Livvy’. God, it had been so long since he’d seen that kind of innocence in his life.

       “I found your keys,” came y/n’s voice from behind him as she pressed the cold metal against his flesh hand.

       “Did you kidnap these kids with my van?” Bucky quipped, his brows furrowing as he watched the interaction happening on the couch.

      “Look, I’ll explain everything later if you end up sticking around. I’m too tired to even banter with you at this point,” y/n shook her head. As if on que, a knock came at the door and she swung it open to reveal the gelato guy!

       “So, you’re fine with me just, staying here?” Bucky raised a brow in suspicion.

       “Join us for breakfast if you want to. Just, try not be such a pain in the butt, Barnes,” y/n sighed. Bucky noticed how uncharacteristically tired she sounded. With a small nod, he took a seat at the dining table in her kitchen area. It wasn’t like he had much for breakfast, what harm could a little more food do?

i hate you but taglist: @sarcastic-britt​​ / @kmuir1​​ / @shower-me-with-roses​​ / @justab-eautifulmess​​ / @thomasthetankson​​ / @x-abi-sharp-x​​ / @intovert-gone-wild​​ / @brittanymcsharry​​ / @leaving-the-past-behind​​ / @xoxabs88xox​​​ / @mylifeiscrazy0423​​​ / @howliebucky​​​ / @i-cry-so-much​​​ / @witchything​​ /   @naimalove143​​ / @simplybarnes​​ /

Forever tags: @spatium-viatorem​​​​ / @sxphiiwrld​​​​ / @strangersstranger​​​​ / @nerdy-bookworm-1998​​​ / @cutie1365​​​ / @valeriiaaass​​ / @adorkably​​ / @whatinthyworld​​ /

MARVEL TAGLIST: @captainamerica-is-bae​​​

BUCKY TAGLIST: @missmidnightxo​​​ / @tinymalscoffee​​ / @howliebucky​​ /

[bbhyeoliskooks]

•◌*’. 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐂𝐡𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐦𝐚𝐬~! *’.◌•

➶ TXT’s Reaction to Spending Christmas with You

•◌•◌•◌•◌•★•◌•◌•◌•◌•

Genre: 1225 cups of fluff !

Warnings: None~~

(eeee, merry christmas 🥺🥺 i’m sorry for not posting much this month, but hopefully I’ll be able to next year ! This might be my last post for the year ? I’m thinking of taking a break since I’ve exhausted my head sksks but thank you for the wonderful year~ I probably won’t take a break since I love writing, but I’m stalling. Merry Christmas all of you ! Bingus and I only wish you happiness from now on !)

•◌•◌•◌•◌•★•◌•◌•◌•◌•

◌• Yeonjun •◌

*’. It’s your first Christmas holiday with your boyfriend Yeonjun this year~~

*’. You were a bit excited and nervous for it since you weren’t sure what to get him… but then again, he would like anything as long as it was from you, right ?

*’. But everything had to be perfect !! You wanted Yeonjun to actually be happy with his gift !!

*’. Yes he told you that you didn’t have to worry about it, but… no?? Really, it had to be something he’d really like and use !!

*’. Let’s try… something fancy according to his tastes ? 

*’. You saved up for this little maroon beret you found in the store the other day, working hard to get that bread

*’. So then, let’s fast forward to Christmas night !

*’. Yeonjun was already home, and he had prepared a few things such as sugar cookie candles, a small Christmas tree in the room you shared, as well as your present that you had no clue what it was

*’. You waited to see Yeonjun’s reaction for the present once you shakily handed it to him due to nervousness, and surprisingly

*’. He really liked it, he couldn’t stop hugging you right after because it was adorable and especially because it was a gift from you (cue clingy Yeonjun sticking to you for the rest of the night but you aren’t complaining)

*’. And his gift ? That’s up to you to decide~~

•◌•◌•◌•◌•★•◌•◌•◌•◌•

◌• Soobin •◌

*’. Every Christmas, you and Soobin made a tradition that before every party you were invited to, you would make a few sugar cookies mostly everyone said they loved

*’. Because of the pandemic this year, you weren’t able to however :((

*’. But that didn’t stop you from having fun !! You still wanted to make some cookies with Soobinie !!

*’. Obviously, he agreed and went along with it since he wanted not only to spend time with you, but also eat some sugar cookies that were made from both of your hearts~!

*’. The trip to the grocery store was quite easy despite all of the customers there, and in minutes you had all of the ingredients set up

*’. Everything with him turned out to be so much fun, you wanted it to last forever-using the tree shapes and gingerbread cutters to make them look at least good to eat :D

*’. There were some red, white, and green icing you had whipped up from yesterday and Soobin decided to use them to 

*’. It was all peaceful at first with you lightly dropping the icing in flowery bits

*’. when suddenly, you felt Soobin’s slender finger boop your nose with a familiar, cold substance

*’. In the end some were not decorated while the others were since…

*’. Most of the frosting had gotten on you two anyway sksks

•◌•◌•◌•◌•★•◌•◌•◌•◌•

◌• Beomgyu •◌

*’. It’s Christmas Eve with Beomgyu which means...

*’. Gingerbread castle (not house) decorating contest in three hours or nothing !!

*’. Once you finished picking up the supplies, you would definitely have to start decorating before 12am passed since that’s when you chose to open up gifts

*’. This boy would be very competitive, and might even knock down yours “accidentally” just so he can get a head start 

*’. You would also hoard the candies that were used to spice things up so Beomgyu wouldn’t be able to get them

*’. Soon, the two of you were play-fighting with all of the food and like Soobin, you guys just ended up fighting each other with the frosting???

*’. But hey, are we really surprised??

*’. no... which is why you bought some cleaning supplies as well sksk

*’. All the meanwhile, Beomgyu kept booping your nose with red frosting and saying that you were Rudolph the Rednosed Reindeer 

*’. And you were just smashing on white icing on his cheeks and calling him Santa

*’. We could say that the Christmas gifts were abandoned as soon as the two of you cleaned up together ~~ You two got so tired that once you cuddled in bed, you collapsed as soon as you were tightly snuggled up with each other

•◌•◌•◌•◌•★•◌•◌•◌•◌•

◌• Taehyun •◌

*’. I think decorating the Christmas tree with Taehyun would be tons of fun~! 

*’. Some of the ornaments came from Taehyun’s family while yours were from your childhood, so it was a lot of nostalgia mixed with love when you two hung them up together

*’. He would be doing one side while you were doing the other, but would then tease you for hanging it up wrong or not making it as pretty (even though it was really pretty, he just didn’t want to stop teasing you~~) !

*’. It was such a peaceful, content time with Taehyun >3< Knowing that the other one was there, staring at what made them happy during the younger days… both of you found it to be incredibly calming

*’. And it makes it much better since the two of you are together !!

*’. Endless questions from your childhood was asked like the traditions and the food, you couldn’t get enough of each other because wow, were you whipped~~

*’. Taehyun couldn’t stop staring at you with heart eyes while you were talking and even laid a hand on his cheek just to gaze lovingly at you (please i’m getting attacked here too)

*’. Then after you were finished with all of those sappy feelings, you two would be up for a game of Christmas karaoke

*’. Doesn’t matter where or when, you guys are singing the famous songs that your neighbors must absolutely despise now

*’. Yes, we’re even talking about that Mariah Carey song okay 

*’. As much as Taehyun loves singing, he loves you so much more and would give the moon and back just to hear your giggles and see you happy

•◌•◌•◌•◌•★•◌•◌•◌•◌•

◌• Kai •◌

*’. This Christmas wasn’t going very well so far…

*’. Having an argument with your parents about going out with your friends this evening, it really wasn’t the best plan to sneak out through the window once they went to sleep

*’. In the end, they were right; you should’ve listened when they said they didn’t trust them one bit

*’. Now you were sitting in a cafe alone where they all had abandoned you, trying not to cry in public and shed some tears

*’. The ring of the cafe’s bell didn’t bring you from out of your gaze, but it was the boy who was staring at you with sad eyes

*’. He didn’t want to seem weird or creepy, but he felt terrible seeing what went down as he sipped on his hot chocolate with his close group of four friends

*’. Truth is, he had been watching you for a while, seeing your shoulders shake under the pressure of trying not to cry

*’. This wasn’t good at all, he didn’t feel happy with warm holiday greetings since one person during Christmas was unhappy

*’. So that’s what brought him to talk to you~! He wanted to make you feel better which ended up in you two spending so many laughs and giggles together~~

*’. Christmas this year was all saved to the cute guy who chose to talk to you instead of staring

*’. And you even got the cute guy’s phone number too :DD

•◌•◌•◌•◌•★•◌•◌•◌•◌•

Posted: 12/25/20- 2:34pm

Tags:

[atsunflower]

Hospital for souls — Silent rebellion

Rated: SFW

Author notes: Man, this chapter was a pain. There isn't much to say about this one. Thanks for everyone who left a comment in the last chapter, y'all are absolutely endearing.

Warnings: Mentions of anxiety, cursing and very pissed off people.

III — Silent Rebellion

Previous || Next

Screams and pleas filled his sleep. His mind was frantic, but his body felt like it was cemented on the surface he laid.

Memories were vivid in the back of his mind, though he couldn't see anything with closed eyelids.

He remembers the glint of metal and he remembers the metal in the blood stench.

Am I dead? — and his body jolted awake.

The discomfort Sakusa felt wasn't caused by the way he slept in the couch and he wasn't disgusted by the sweat layering his skin.

He felt disgusted by the memory of crimson painting his hands.

Recalling the vivid image, his legs led him to the kitchen in auto pilot mode. Reaching for the sink, hands grabbed the soap, rubbing it as if his life depended on it. His eyes wandered around the place, taking in the cleaniness of it.

She had a good taste, he would give her that.

"Shit, Komori" In long strides he went for the bedroom the Kobun was. Resting his body against the doorframe, he took on the scene before him.

In the bed, the brown-haired male slept in a peaceful state, as if his life wasn't on the line a couple of hours ago.

Through the chapped lips, air exhaled in a steady pace; the sight itself allowing Sakusa to breath properly for the first time within the last hours.

"Sakusa-san?" Your whisper ringed on his ears. You came from your personal bathroom, holding a bunch of clothes and bandages.

Staring at your figure, he saw how tired you looked. He couldn't ignore the bruises and scrapes littering your hands and face either."Komori-san had a tranquil night. But I still think he should go to a hospital, just in case" He noded, stare hardening while you spoke.

"How are you?" The tall male asked in a mere courtesy, you were still unsure wether he cared or not about your well-being.

"Fine" You spat drily before making your way to the sleeping man. "Gotta wake him up to see how the wound is" the whisper left your lips in a rushed manner.

Sakusa observed as you crouched down to the bed's level, setting the materials you brought on the nightstanding. Placing a hand on Komori's right shoulder, you shook him gently, only to startle him awake.

"[Name]?" The man frowned, holding the hand you had on his shoulder on an vice grip. "What the hell? Where the fuck is Kiyoomi?" Hatred dripping out of his grey irises, you shivered under the weight of his stare.

"I'm right here, Komori" Your husband said pulling off of the doorframe. A sigh of relief left the kobun's lips while both males exchanged knowing looks.

You cleared your throat, shaking the wrist Komori was still grasping.

"Can I see your wound so you guys can discuss whatever?" You didn't mean to snap, but hell, were you tired. At least, the brown haired man had the decency to look sheepish at his outburst. "Other than pain, are you feeling anything?"

"It just hurts like hell" Komori replied eyeing you. He took in your appearence, noticing how bruises litered your face, how a greyish tone colored your eyelids and how chapped your lips were. There was a weight in your features that made you look even more tired than you were supposed to be.

"Do you think you can bend the ring and pinky fingers?" He hissed but did as was told. You undid the bandages, seeing the stitches were perfect. You hummed in satisfaction, changing the dressings and readjusting the splint. "You need to see a doctor, I can't say if there is a nervous damages in your arm." He nodded, eyes locking to your handiwork while you checked his vitals.

"What happened to my arm?" His voice was rushed, reacalling the memory of being stabbed.

"[Name] said the knife hit an artery. You didn't want to go to a hospital so she saved your ass." You didn't bother to listen their dialogue, leaving the room as fast as possible.

Coming from them, the word 'save' held no meaning to you.

"We gotta contact Fukuroudani and check if they found something." Sakusa said pinching the bridge of his nose "What the fuck is Johzenji supposed to mean?"

"I don't have idea. Do you think Inarizaki is involved?" Komori asked, doubting the Miya were related to the recent events.

Something about the fight was off and the Itachiyama oyabun couldn't pinpoint what it was.

"I guess they're not. But we can't let our guard down either" The ravenette huffed trying to ignore the weight on his chest.

"Well, guess she has a list of reasons to want us dead. And still, [Name] helped us last night" He shrugged, sitting on the bed. He looked around the place, not reconigzing it. "Where we are?"

He knew you weren't related to the incident, but a part of him refused to trust you.

Inarizaki isn't one to be trusted, after all.

"It's [Name]'s place"

"Suits her" The Kobun hummed "Well, guess we have to make some calls"

"Komori" Sakusa voiced, using a stern tone "We need to talk."

"Not a fucking chance" Was all the brunette said, ignoring his Oyabun as he reached for his phone, dialling Konoha's number.

Your body jolted up when you felt people in your surroundings.

"Oh, [Name]-san. You're awake" You heard Komori saying while you observed they making themselves comfortable in the armchairs of your livingroom. You grimaced at his nice attitude.

"You aren't supposed to be out of the bed." You frowned watching three paper bags seating in you coffee table, the rich scent of cinnamon and coffee filling your nostrils.

"Don't worry. It takes much more to knock me out, I'm fine" The hazel haired man said as he handed you one of the bags with his damaged arm as if to prove his point. He was supposed to be in big pain and yet, his face showed no sign of discomfort.

He should be used to it, you supposed.

You opened the bag, eyeing its contents. You realized it was from the café across the street; the wave of nostalgia hitting you again as you took both paper cup and caramel muffin in your hands.

You took a bite of the baked good, feeling the taste of cake and caramel melting in your tongue. You smiled at it, recalling the rushed mornings when you would go to the eatery, in your way to work.

"Is the muffin that good?" Komori asked as a glint of amusement crossed his eyes.

"I just missed this place really bad." A pleased face took over your features, almost making you forget the current situation you were in.

Again, why you had to go through this?

"[Name]" The ravenette's voice blared in your ears "Hurry. We have important business today" All of sudden, the food tasted stale in your mouth.

Both men were waiting for you on the entrance hall, observing how you quickly you tidied the place.

"Shouldn't we clean before we leave?" Komori asked Sakusa.

You rolled your eyes and stood to grab your belongings. From the kitchen drawers, you took a plastic bag to dispose the thrash.

"The lady upstairs takes care of the place for me" Oh, you heard it. "It's not like anyone is coming back here anytime soon, too." You three took the elevator, going to the sidewalk where the car was parked.

"What's up for today, then?" The Kobun asked as you three entered the vehicle while Sakusa occupied the driver's seat.

"We have a meeting with Fukuroudani and Inarizaki" Your husband said eyeing you through the rearview. You ignored them as they chatted. "Looks like they have info regarding Johzenji"

"Are we going there?"

"No, they're already on Itachiyama, waiting for us" The ravenette answered as he drove smoothly through Tokyo streets.

You were doing your best to forget the memories of the night prior, but you realized you have never experienced such stress. Your lungs gave in a shaky breath as your mind felt like on the verge of breaking down.

"So it's really like they aren't involved... you know" The silence was thick as you recalled their accusations.

A couple of minutes later, you realized the ride didn't last much as you spotted Itachiyama lands, the mansion being seen by distance with the pristine white of its walls. Across the gates, the clean pavement and stunning garden welcomed you while you spotted the expensive cars parked by the house entrance.

"Meeting room, now. You included, [Name]" And here he was, his timbre giving the fact that Itachiyama's Oyabun wasn't someone to be defied.

The air inside the house was crispy cold. Your body hurted everywhere and the unsettling feeling in your stomach wasn't going away anytime soon. You didn't want to have anything to do with this reunion, and you were restless about the idea of facing both Osamu and Atsumu after this whole month.

You despised them for making you go through this.

You were never been into the meeting room before. And the image before your eyes wasn't like anything you have imagined.

It wasn't like the regular conference rooms, with a large table with a good amount of seats and all. No, the place screamed traditional: pristine dark floorboards, paper pannels covering the walls and a large chabudai table on the floor, with ten pillowy seats partially occupied by the guests.

The room smelled like burning incense and sake, the scent making you calm in a weird way.

Sakusa indicated your seat as you three made your way to the table. The five men slighty bowed their heads, greeting you.

Your husband grabbed a jar of sake out of nowhere, serving the porcelain hakushika before you first and the proceeding to fill his, Komori's and the other guests cups after.

"Kanpai" they said before downing the alchool down. You mimicked their actions, feeling the liquid burning your throat. You winced at the sensation as Suna sent you an amused look — it took all of your might to not show him your middle finger.

"Heard y'all had a shitty night, huh" Atsumu said on his provocative manner as Osamu eyed him warily. Your husband sitting by your right seemed unfazed by it while Konoha clicked his tongue.

What a way to make disaffections, you thought.

"If you don't have anything useful to say, Miya, shut it." Komori warned the blond man without traces of simpathy " Shall we start?"

At this, the four other men eyed you with caution. Weren't you supposed to be here?

"[Name] was there and she could reconize the woman. It's her business too, since she was attacked first" Was Sakusa's response to their implied question.

"Were they aiming for her?" The ravenette you never saw before asked.

"I don't think they were necessarily targetting [Name], Akashi." You frowned at Komori's reply. Something didn't click, you thought as you opened your mouth:

"Did they attack Inarizaki?" A proud feeling took over your chest as you realized your voice sounded steady.

Suna frowned and looked at Osamu. The latter nodded at the brunette.

"Not directly. They tried to interfere on some of our business and kinda stalked one of Tsumu's... acquaintances. Yeah, that's all" it was Suna's answered not getting your point.

"How many people know the circumstances of our marriage?" You asked directly at Sakusa, seing him frown.

"Just the involved parts. What are you implying?"

"I... I think they are trying to use me to create a strain between Itachiyama and Inarizaki" Your voice wavered at it. Atsumu obnoxiously laughed at what you said as if it was some kind of joke.

"How cute, [Name]" the blond twin giggled as the atmosphere got heavier and heavier "Tho our relationship 's already strained. Ya ain't that special" He wipped an invisible tear to add to his annoying act.

"Actually..." The man Akaashi butted in, his face contorting in a pensive manner "I think she is right."

"Yeah, it's not like they know how the alliance between your houses was estabelished. Think, they tried to incriminate her and last night she was the first one to be attacked" Konoha added to the discussion. You looked at him with surprise "Don't be so surprised, we should know the reason why you went there last night."

"Okay. So the fact is they're after [Name]-san, trying to destabilize both Itachiyama and Inarizaki. Why?" Akaashi inquired, rolling the white hakushika between his slender fingers. The cup glinted in the dim light, reflecting in the gunmetal gray of his irises.

"Well, lucky us, we went ta Niiyama today." Atsumu chimmed in and you didn't have idea of what he was talking about.

"Nee-san doesn't know very much tho" Osamu added to his twin's speech "Looks like these Johzenji guys are a bloomin' gang"

"If they're a gang, what are they up to, then? It's kind dumb to mess with the families when you're this insignificant" Konoha asked seeming trully dumbfolded.

"They're trying, at least, show some bravery" Suna retorted, fidgeting with his cellphone. Straightening his back, a glint of unnecessary pride crossed his eyes as his lips twisted in a provocative curve "Inarizaki and Itachiyama are the most important households. If Johzenji manage to cause ruckus, it can gain some sense of respect between another gangs"

"Still, it doesn't make much sense" Akaashi said as he fished an manila folder on his suit. Suna shrugged at it, coming back to his usual aloof demeanor. "Well, looks like it's you problem. Fukuroudani will cooperate if needed, but it's not like we can be of much help right now" The male handed the envelope to Komori, before standing on his feet. "This is all the information we gathered from the guy we captured yesterday. It's not much, so we will send him to you by nighttime." He completed his statement with a solemn glare, out of respect.

"We have to go now. Thank you so much for having us here, Sakusa-san" Konoha said as he and Akaashi bowed their heads at Sakusa "Let us know if you need anything" The ash-blond haired man bid his farewells as Komori walked them to the doors. The air got thicker with the five of you stared at each other; Suna mouthed something at you, but you couldn't catch what. Atsumu looked at you two with a mischievous smile but opted to keep quiet instead.

The Itachiyama Kobun returned, sitting back on his previous position.

"You okay, Komori-san?" Osamu asked as a mere courtesy, trying to break the still atmosphere.

"Oh, it's nothing. Just a cut that [Name]-san managed to patch up" The hazel haired Kobun replied in a polite tone while the infamous Inarizaki duo arched their brows to the honorific he used to reffer at you.

"Glad ta know she is not useless ta y'all" Atsumu provoked as he got up from his seat. He held back the urge to strech as his fellow companions did the same "It's time we go, too. Since they afta' Ina too, let us know if they try somethin'." Looked like the blond really meant it.

"We will see you off, then" Sakusa spoke for the first time in a while as you all stood from the low sitting position.

You husband and his Kobun went first, opening the doors and guiding you trought the corridors. Suna walked by your side, when he ruffled your hair for no special reason.

"Make sure to rest, you look like shit" He snickered but you were too tired to argue "I have something for you. Here, take it." the tall male handed you a beige envelope with a cute sticker of a Kitsune sealing it.

You took it with grattitude while he smiled softly at you. You mouthed a quiet 'thank you' at him as the brunette ruffled your hair again.

"Well, thanks I guess" Atsumu bid a half-assed farewell as he got out of the mansion. Suna and the other Miya twin followed him suit, not without bowing their hads at Sakusa showing some courtesy. You swore the gray irises of Osamu lingered a little longer in your figure; you choose to ignore the churning sensation in your stomach as you tried to decipher his intense stare.

"What is it?" Your husband inquired, glaring at the envelope in your hands with suspicion; you opened it and froze when you looked at its contents. With the lack of response he snatched it from you in a rough manner, crumpling the paper.

"Hey, you don't need to be rude!"

"You don't get to tell me what to do" He bluntly said as he inspectioned the envelope "It's not like I have any reason to trust you, Miya runt."

Within you, something snapped. You were sure you'd regret it later, but for now, you would blame the stress you were upon.

"Very much to respect your women" Your voice dripped venom as you recalled what he told you in the first day you met "You know, it's not like I wanted to be here, anyways"

"[Name]" Komori warned but you choose to ignore him.

"I hate this fucking yakuza thing. I despise you as much as I despise the Miya" You told as you looked at him dead in the eyes.

"Oh, fancy words coming from a Miya yourself." The ravenette said, keeping his cool.

"I'm not a fucking Miya!" You sneered, althought you wanted to scream "I'm not at fault that good for nothing of their father got my mother pregnant. Bad news to you: you fucking married a bastard"

"I can tell I did" His brow arched. His silence was unsettling but you didn't want to back out at this point.

"Well, I did too. Tough I regret the day I was forced to get involved with a criminal bastard like you." It was too fast. In a second, his tall frame was towering over yours.

You froze under his hard stare, sure he could end your existence anytime he wanted.

"Get the fuck out of my sight" The deep baritone of his timber killed any courage you garthered.

Yakuza would take away any dignity you had.

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