#this is mostly joking but I've been thinking of them A LOT lately

[rainybraindays]

The best dc friendship is Ted kord blue beetle and booster gold, and if you disagree thats okay but clearly you're blind

[silverselfshippingchaos]

he <3

[brittlebutch]

one of the many reasons Aabria is such a good GM is because of the very keen eye she keeps on the social dynamics and interactions that happens at the table and i absolutely Love her for it

[sysig]

Strong look, minor details ✨ (Patreon)

[therealandian]

right okay now that i've had a minute where i'm not at work, i wrote a little drabble to go along with this:

Elias stopped dead in his tracks, not quite believing what was in front of him. “Wh—Since when did you get here!?” he demanded, pointing an accusatory finger at his best friend, who was meandering down the street like he'd walked it a thousand times. “We weren't anywhere close to Earth when you left—there's no possible way you could have arrived before me!” After standing stunned for a moment, Jon pointed back with a grin on his face and a twinkling glow in his eyes. Admittedly his eyes always looked like that, but that wasn't the point. “That's what you think!” he laughed. “I just happen to be good friends with an eldritch demigod!” He kept pointing, and he kept laughing, and at this point Elias was just a little bit peeved. “You bastard! Why didn't you tell me you wanted to come back here!? I spent thirty years on my own getting here, and that's barely counting the time travel!” Jon laughed harder. “I've been here since 1995!” At that point, Elias could feel himself beginning to tremble from rage, but he kept it together. Mostly. “This could've been significantly easier for both of us if you'd just told me!”

Jon was laughing too hard to speak. A tear slid down his cheek, followed quickly by another. To make matters worse, he was still pointing at Elias like he couldn't quite believe what was happening. Admittedly Elias was also still pointing, but he wasn't having nearly as much fun. He wished he was—it looked, well, fun! As if things couldn't get more confusing, another figure appeared from nowhere and froze as the light of teleportation faded around him. “Uh…,” said Martin Blackwood. Jon didn't notice; he was busy still. Elias did, of course, and a spike of dread stabbed him in the chest. “Uh…,” he echoed. As if pulled by some unseen force, Martin raised both his hands, one pointing at Jon, and one pointing at Elias. He glanced back and forth between the two as if he couldn't quite wrap his head around what he was looking at. His jaw flapped, but no words came out. Jon clutched his stomach and squeezed his eyes shut, not quite stopping the laughter, but at least getting it down to an uncontrollable giggle. He wiped away the tears. “You should've seen the look on your face!” he cried. Elias finally figured out how to lower his hand and stop pointing at his absurd comrade. “Erm…Jon?” “Yeah, yeah,” he breathed, waving a dismissive hand. “Give me a minute.” Meanwhile, Martin finally figured out how to make his mouth work, and spoke. “What the fuck did I just teleport into!?” Jon peeked up at him, grin widening once more as he wiped the tears off his cheeks. “Oh, hello, Martin! Fancy seeing you here!”

:P

i just want to end this off by saying something important to me: as of 5 days from now (may 29th), redeath will be turning 4 years old which is just. UTTERLY wild to me.

when i first started writing that thing i did NOT expect i'd still be working on it this much later. and the fact that i started on stts in late summer of '21 is just. wow this au has gone on for a while. and i still love it to bits! even now with this i'm still finding new fun ways to get them to reunite (thanks @ike9306 for the idea), and it's just. i have no idea how many iterations of the end of this fic i've gone through but i definitely didn't expect where i eventually wound up lol. i still can't believe i thought 50k was a reasonable expectation for stts XD

so i just wanna say thanks--to old fans who've been here from the start and to new ones who literally just found this today. to the people who leave comments on every chapter, those who occasionally drop one on their favorite parts, and to the lurkers i can't see but know are there. i've had an unbelievably fun time playing around with this goofyass concept, and i'm so happy to see other people have enjoyed it too. i don't know that i would've without the overwhelming amount of excited feedback begging for more <3

we've still got a few chapters to go, but i'm hoping yall will find it well worth the time it took us all to get here (looking at the person who read like. all of redeath and all of stts up to that point in one very long session. you know who you are.)

Commission for @therealandian for the fic "Search Through the Stars". Disclaimer, this is not actually what happens! Go check it out.

Thanks for the support!

[txttletale]

hey what DO you watch on youtube? seems like you'd have some neat recommendations :3

i really loathe the like super-highly edited sound effect post-mrbeast slop most of youtube is now so i mostly like stuff that's like... calm and sedate. stuff i've been watching lately in no particular order:

northernlion vods and clips. he's an OG. i especially like his react court series, i must have watched all of them like five times.

speaking of OGs i've been watching zero puncutation (now fully ramblomatic) for like ten years and if anything it's only gotten better. best game review content on the internet. been really enjoying his more recent, slightly longer and more thoughtful 'extra punctuation/semi-ramblomatic' series too.

any austin's skyrim unemployment rate videos. instant classics to me, it's just a guy going around in skyrim trying to figure out the unemployment rate in every town. it's a very dry kind of humour, he plays it admirably straight, and it's weirdly calming.

kitten arcader's foot the bill videos. in a kind of similar vein, he watches the saw movies and then produces an itemized bill for everything jigsaw needed to buy to make his traps. it's kind of like... if cinemasins was fundamentally curious instead of fundamentally incurious, it scratches a similar sort of nitpicky detail-oriented quantifying itch but without inimical to the concept of art.

shuffle up and play. it's a magic the gathering play series that has enough editing that the gamestate is actually legible but not enough editing (or at least, not enough obtrusive in-your-face editing) that its annoying. i also like that they reguilarly play non-edh formats like cube and pauper.

spice8rack. i'm pretty picky about video essays but spice8rack has very obviously actually read books and has interesting things to say about the topics it discusses (mostly magic: the gathering). sometimes it has a kind of grating Theater Kid Energy but the fact that it actually meaningfully structures essays and analysis to earn the silly long runtimes is a rare delight from a video essayist.

jenny nicholson is a long-time favourite and another permanent fixture in my rotation. she's just extremely, remarkably funny which makes her the only 'basically just summarizing a thing' youtuber i think is worth the time of day.

i watch some sketch comedy, mainly wizards with guns and aunty donna, who both consistently put out really funny stuff that's kind of ITYSL-adjacent in its barefaced absurdism and contenmpt for concepts like "stopping a joke at the logical punchline". i also really like alasdair beckett-king and binging the old clickhole backlog for short-form comedy on youtube.

wolfeyvgc is right on the edge of the level of editing i find tolerable but as a long-time fan of multiple esports he Has It, he's absolutelyt fantastic at t elling the narrative of a tournament, explaining plays clearly, and generally making competitive pokemon esports thrilling and interesting ti someone (me) who#s never played it and doesn't care about pkoemon that much

i religously watch every elliespectacular/dathings YTP, the absolute best in the game right now, top tier snetence mixing and really good at actually setting up and paying off jokes in a way it feels like a lot of ytp doesn't. verytallbart is also pretty good.

trapperdapper is a channel i recently binged, it's a really fucking funny parody of minecraft challenge content that veers slowly from obvious angles of parody into pure absurdism with tons of blink-and-you'll miss it subtle visual gags.

too much future is a great youtube series where the two guys from just king things/homestuck made this world play through every fallout game and analyze them in that context. extremely funny and also just top-tier very sharp analysis. really good

another one of the rare good video essayists is jan misali. they're really funny and will go into topics that kind of seem narrow or strange to begin with in such depth and make them so interesting that it's consistently astonishing.

oh and finally sarah z makes pretty good videos. 'the narcissist scare' is an absolutely brilliant deconstruction of one of the most annoying pop-psych phenomena of the last couple years. and remarkably well script supervised i think did anyone else watch it and think 'wow the script supervisor on this must have been, a mind geniuse'

ok i think that's all i've been watching lately. hope you like whcihever of these recs you check out :)

[sundrop-writes]

if Mike fell asleep with you...

Word Count: 750

Horror Characters Masterlist

Warnings: this is mostly pure fluff - Mike and the reader are in an established relationship, the reader's gender is not described in any way (the main pronouns used are you/yours), Mike calls the reader angel, the reader takes on a caregiver role for Abby, mostly just short and fluffy. This is set before the main events of the movie, when Mike is working as a security guard at the mall.

A/N: So, I've seen so many people in the tags going 'just let him sleep!!! that man is so exhausted!!' and saying that he's too tired to fuck in the way that people are writing fanfics about him. And as much as I love super horny fics, I do thought this up, because I agree - the man should be allowed to sleep. This is largely inspired by that scene in Grey's Anatomy where Meredith walked in and Owen was asleep on Cristina's chest while she was reading a book (I think it was when she was reading through Mer's mom's diaries?) - anyway. I love that scene so much because it shows how easily he sleeps around her because he's so comfortable around her. And that's why it deeply inspired this. Let him sleep.

...

Mike was exhausted when he came in the door. 

He heaved out a sigh as he closed the door behind him, toeing off his shoes - pure, stiff tiredness radiating through his whole body in the worst way. 

You knew that sound anywhere. 

“Long day?” You inquired gently from your position on the couch, lightly craning your neck to look at him. 

He shuffled further into the house in an almost zombie-like fashion, only giving you a solitary grunt in response. 

You felt kind of bad that he had been stuck at work late when you had been lucky enough to have a morning shift and been treated to a relaxing evening with Abby. She was a relatively easy kid to take care of, and generally fun to be around. 

And after you had put her to bed, you laid out on the couch, relaxing and reading a novel that your friend had recommended. Generally, you were having a nice evening. And it seemed that Mike was not. 

As you kept an eye on Mike, you folded over the page of your book to mark it and put it on the coffee table for later. 

“Dinner’s on the counter.” You told him. “I made lasagna. I can heat it up for you if you want.” 

You hated that before he started dating you, all he knew was freezer burnt crap - but you were slowly showing him how to cook, and a world of vegetables that didn't come in a can. 

Mike took off his jacket and the heavy belt he had to wear for work (his large walkie talkie and his taser were in his locker at work, as mandated, but the thing was still damn uncomfortable) and he hung them both up. 

He didn’t respond to your queries about dinner as he walked around the couch. Instead of speaking, seeing you laying there so relaxed - the sight was all too inviting, and he eased himself to lay on top of you in a form of very natural intimacy before he grunted a few words into your neck. 

“Did Abby eat?” He asked softly as he laid on top of you. 

It was oddly comforting to have the bulk of his weight on top of you, especially as he melted against you, letting out a small moan as the tension melted out of his bones. He adjusted himself to get more comfortable and his face rested against the softness of your chest - you glanced down to see that his eyes were drifting closed. 

“She ate two platefuls, and had some peas.” You assured him. “Did her homework, had a bath, and she practiced her spelling words before she went to bed.” 

Mike grunted again - a more positive pitch to this one. He couldn't ask for anyone better than you. Sometimes he worried about her - all the time. But when Abby was with you, that worry lessened a lot. 

“You’re an angel.” He hummed against your chest. “I don’t-” He let out a gentle yawn. “I don’t know how I got so lucky with you.” 

“You look hot in a uniform and my job at the bookstore gets boring.” You replied, half-joking about the circumstances of how your relationship with Mike had formed. 

You reached out to him and began running your fingers through his hair, soothing him even further into the realm of sleep with the comforting touch. 

He let out another tired moan in reply - something that almost stretched into a rolling sound with the gentle pleasure of your hand in his hair. With the way his body was so slack against yours, his breathing even and quiet, you knew this was only leading one place. 

“You wanna go get ready for bed?” You asked gently. 

“In a minute.” He answered softly, barely parting his lips to get the words out. 

You glanced over to the table and reached out, picking your book back up as his breathing deepened and his body went even more slack. You were preparing to get comfortable for the next few hours. You weren’t all that tired yourself, and you still had a few chapters left to go. When you got to the next chapter, he began to snore lightly and you felt drool dripping down your neck - which didn’t bother you all that much. You found it cute, in fact. 

You were comforted by the fact that he relaxed enough around you to get such a good sleep. You knew that he needed it. 

...

A/N: also, this is my first time posting a fic completely from mobile by copy/pasting something from google docs on my phone. So hopefully the formatting isn't too messed up and hopefully this goes well! And I hope you guys enjoy this short fluffy fic 💖

[someguycalledratcliff]

I've been thinking a lot lately about why Okarun feels so fresh as a character, and I think it's because it's weirdly rare to see a well written, likeable nerd in anime. The medium is so full of nerdy characters, and YET they're so rarely actually good. There's three common pitfalls that I think nerdy characters tend to fall into, and Okarun handily avoids all of them. 1. Butt of a joke

Now Okarun is in a comedy manga/anime, but the reason he's very much not *just* there to be funny. Yeah his interests are played for laughs, but they're also part of a backstory that's very much meant to be taken seriously. He's respected as character in his own right. 2. Obnoxious pervert or straight up sexual harasser

It goes without saying there's just... so many perverted characters in anime, but I feel like nerdy or dweeby characters are all the more likely to do this, and do it in a more aggrevated way. The less you're supposed to take a character seriously (hence, comedic characters, which nerds often are), the more likely they are to be just... terrible to women. Okarun though? He's like. Aggressvely not perverted. I think about that scene where Momo is changing, where the joke is that he keeps staring at the wall longer than he needs to. He's seen her in her underwear like... honestly a lot (now that's a part of Dandadan I don't love, but that's a discussion for another day...), but he's never weird about it. This is a low ass bar, but it's just nice to have character who's awkward, but not a rancid pervert. 3. Power fantasy wish fulfilment

This is probably the hardest point to argue, but I would not say Okarun is a classic case of wish fulfilment. There are definitely elements of that, with all the women who inexplicably like him and the superpowers. Still, I'd say there are two, maybe three things that set him apart from this trope. Firstly, he never becomes cool. He gets cool moments, he gets to do cool things, but at the end of the day, he's still just a polite, awkward kid. That never goes away. Second, I think it's important that he's never the most powerful of his friends. Frankly-- he might even be the weakest! Momo alone is more capable and versatile than he is, not to mention Vamola or Jiji/Evil Eye. Frankly, Momo is even way more of a main character than Okarun is. So Okarun is not really that powerful... but what about all the girls? I would say that part is much more akin to good old wish fulfilment. But to me anyway, it doesn't really feel that way. Mostly because we all know he's gonna end up with Momo, so it doesn't feel that much like a real harem.

Watching and reading Dandadan has really made me crave more good nerdy characters... The only other ones I can name off the top of my head are Ishigami from Love Is War and Okabe from Steins;Gate. And that's not a great showing for a genre filled to the brim with nerds.

[sonotkari]

Saturn

Hanni Pham x Fem Reader

[ Synopsis ]

Listening to Saturn by Sza has made you think about many things since your last (not-so) relationship, and Hanni is on your side, listening to you yapping your thoughts.

Fluff, Angst, and a tiny bit of cursing :)

[ Word Count ]

1.5k yes it's very very short :(

[ a/n ]

I've been listening to a lot of songs lately and the idea just popped out when I was listening to Sza! It's really cheesy like, really, might be too tacky but oh well :P My first time writing this kind of stuff so it's a mess but do please take it easy on me guys /ᐠ｡ꞈ｡ᐟ\ (i suck at writing honestly)

I hope someone out there likes it dis for u bae <3

You've spent your entire year, loving someone. As the "giving it all" type of persona when it comes to relationships even when it's as small as a crush, you really gave it your all. Praising them the chance you got to, making sure to spend lots of quality time together, presenting gifts for no particular reason just because you enjoyed seeing the smile that appeared on their face with the cute little dimple on their cheeks which was one of the many things you liked- no, loved about them.

But maybe it was a little too much or perhaps it was something else. You eventually got tired of pursuing them after a year. Feeling more and more drained as the days passed and feeling that both of your distances hadn't moved an inch, you were debating a lot with yourself. Mixed signals were everywhere but you just couldn't let them go that easily. Like you were stuck in quicksand, trying to get out of it but as you do, you just sink in deeper. Might as well let it sink in and disappear. 

That was all a year ago, and you were now outside by the beach. Sat by the white sand as you admired how beautiful the waves were even at nighttime. Saturn by Sza was playing on your headphones as you looked up at the dark sky, admiring the little stars you could barely see while the sound of waves was also in the background with the music. 

If Karma's really real

How am I still here? 

Just seems so unfair 

I could be wrong tho

If there's a point to being good

Then where's my reward?

The good die young and poor

I gave it all I could 

The lyrics hit you hard, earning a bit of a chest pain as you couldn't relate to it more than ever. All the fun memories you had together flooded your mind as you listened to the music. Going to dates where she mostly wanted to go, having late-night calls and talking about almost everything that was going on with your life to each other, all the stupid jokes and the bickering where your friends couldn't take it anymore and the two of you would just laugh it all off.

You had to lose it all. Sometimes you wonder if you've made the wrong decision to let go. Regret washes your entire mind and soul as your tears start flowing non-stop every midnight, reminding you of all of the beautiful memories you just had to trash out because of the choice you made. But as much as you felt all the joy and the happiness of the world when you were with her, it began to change into pain. Pain that you wouldn't have imagined stinging so much that you eventually had to make a choice to let go and leave. 

Taking a big deep breath, you felt someone's presence come and sit beside you. You smile softly at her as you take off your headphones, letting them hang on your neck for a while as you can hear small music leaking from them. 

"What are you doing here at this time?" 

"Just admiring the view while having some fresh air" 

"You sound like a romantic" 

Hanni snorted a bit as she looked at the view in front of her. The small cold breeze hits both of you smelling a hint of sea salt passing by as well.

"I thought you were crying again" 

"Stop reminding me, it's embarrassing" 

You laugh a bit at what Hanni had just said and remember the time when she decided to crash into your apartment with snacks in her hand but instead caught you crying in your room alone with crumpled tissues scattered everywhere. You were a total mess at that time and the image still creeps into your mind, sending a shiver and an uneasy wave of embarrassment down your spine every time you remember them. 

"I was thinking of her, though..." 

Thoughts linger on about her once again as you start to daze off from the beach view. 

What if I didn't let go of her? Would we still be talking, laughing at each other like we always do, or would I be in a crying mess again? 

We used to joke around, laughing non-stop at almost everything, now all I do is cry non-stop instead. I sometimes wonder, if I had enough courage in me and talked about my feelings about her, we might've done something about it together.

 I wonder if she thinks about me like I do. Has she ever cried about me? I feel bad if I ever made her cry. Not like I can do something about it now. 

I wish I could, but I think it'll just hurt me again. Because I'll be giving her my all again and I'll be stuck in a loop then. 

You snapped out when you finally noticed you were rambling your thoughts to Hanni without even noticing. 

"Sorry..." 

"Don't be"

Hanni shifted her gaze, locking them at yours as she smiled warmly. You would always feel reassured every time you see that smile of hers. Perfectly warm for a cold breezy night. You could see the stars clearly by now and the moon peaking from the thin clouds, the light shimmering as it reflects on the surface of the water, and a bit of music that's still playing from your headphones, going to the end of the chorus. 

Find something worth saving 

It's all for the taking 

I always say 

I'll be better on Saturn 

None of this matters 

Dreaming of Saturn 

You listen to the lyrics and think if it'd be actually nice on Saturn. Even if it wasn't as far as Saturn, just somewhere you could ease your mind without all the lingering thoughts that wrapped you around like a thorned bush, pricking your soul. 

"Saturn sounds nice" 

The girl stares at you with a hint of confusion in her eyes as you suddenly, out of the blue, talk about planets. 

"I'm so fucked up on this planet, might as well just go to Saturn you know?" 

You never know, being in Saturn might be better than you think. Far away from the problems you've left behind, no one chasing you down for it. I'll make Saturn a place where I could rest from heart, just carefree and mindless. No more pain or hurt. Just focusing on myself and the future ahead of me. I bet I could make the best planet in the universe if NASA would let me. Well, that would be valid if we could "land" on Saturn in the first place without burning and melting ourselves. 

You outed a chuckle as you yapped your thoughts of Saturn to Hanni and the girl couldn't help but laugh lightly at your sudden plans about making the "best planet in the universe" 

But deep down, you knew that even when you'd send yourself off to Saturn or even as far away as Neptune, you'd somehow think about the girl just like how you've been lingering your thoughts on her on a random night at the beach. You take a deep breath, stopping thinking about it for once when you hear her speak up in a quiet mumble. 

"I'll be your Saturn." 

It was your turn to look at the girl with confusion and surprise. Your eyes met once again as she showed that warm smile with a soft chuckle. 

"Sorry, that just sounded cheesier way more than I imagined"

Your thoughts wander again. 

Hanni had been with you from your first-ever crush to your first-ever relationship (even when it was complicated as hell) till your heartbreaking moments. She was the one who you'd open up to when it came to opinions and bits of advice, she's the one you'd tell firsthand about every exciting thing that happened to your life, the one you'd update even when it was 3 am early in the morning, and her shoulders were the ones you cried and leaned on when your heart was shattered to pieces.

Being with Hanni allowed you to be idiotic, to be yourself. No matter how bad the situations were or how stupid things could get when with her, you could just laugh it all off and be carefree. You'd forget all your worries and problems, and the time with her would fly so fast. You remember way back then, you'd repeatedly ask Hanni's mom if she could stay a bit longer. You feel all the comfort you need when you're with her. 

"You already are"  

Her facial expression turned into a surprised one as she heard your response. The music leaking from your headphones had finally come to an end, only the sound of waves in the background left as you gave back the warm smile she always wears to reassure you, letting you forget all the problems and weight on your shoulders. 

"You are my Saturn" 

After some time of staring at each other, the long comforting silence soon ended with soft giggles and laughs as you and Hanni looked back at the ocean view with the golden moon and diamond stars shining their way making everything a perfect picture. 

"You were right... that did sound cheesier than I imagined" 

no way I just fkn finished this wait what

[hyperfixatedbastard]

Hi i hope you doing well. I have a resquest... more like a headcanon. What if Adam was a dad ? What his behaviour will be ? Does he be a good or a bad father ?

I understand if you don't do it. I don't want to force you for something you don't want to.

Dadam (Dad!Adam) Headcanons

we bringing out the daddy issues on this one boys

WARNINGS: none

A/N: I haven't done a headcanon type of post yet, but they're easier to write than regular one shots and I'm too tired for that shit. The request didn't specify what kind of Reader (spouse or child), so I just went with general headcanons that don't specify the Reader at all. Insert yourself as you wish!

Also, thank you all for your patience! It's been very busy for me lately and I've been too exhausted to write much, so expect a lot more of these kinds of posts (the formatting is easier and I don't have to write a bunch of dialogue lol).

Dividers

As the father of humanity, Adam had...a lot of kids. The guy lived for 800+ years just populating the earth. That's a LOT of kids. We all know how the first two turned out. That is, not fuckin' well. To be honest, I don't think Adam valued his children. It was just kinda... a thing he had to do. (When Abel died and Cain got exiled, he fr just went and had another kid to replace them.) But I am in deep, deep denial and this is for my enjoyment as someone with severe daddy issues. So fuck all that.

At first, Adam is 100% the guy that freaks the fuck out when he finds out he knocked someone up. That man is SWEATING. He's actually pretty chill if it's someone he's in an established long-term relationship with, though. He still freaks the fuck out, but to a significantly lesser degree and with a much smaller chance of up and leaving. Once he's over the initial shock, he's shocked to find that he's kind of excited. Back when he was alive, having kids was just normal because it was such a common occurrence.

This man knows every little detail about pregnancy and infants. With the amount of kids he's had? He has seen it ALL. Sure, all his information is thousands of years old, but knowledge learned through experience is super valuable when it comes to this shit! He doesn't know what the fuck a uterus is, but he knows exactly how to make his partner the most comfortable, how to deal with cravings, etc. If his partner has a problem, he's got a solution. It might be a fuckin' weird one, but it works! He'll probably grumble and complain, but he doesn't actually mean it. Bitching is just his thing, y'know? But... pregnancy hormones + Adam's douchebag-ness = feelings getting hurt. If his partner starts crying because of some shit joke or complaint he made? He's scrambling so fast. "Shit, babe, fuck, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it, fuckfuckfuck, don't cry—"

Once the baby is born, he definitely surprises literally everyone but his partner by actually doing helpful shit. Changing diapers? Easy fuckin' peasy (he does watch a tutorial online because he doesn't know how tf modern diapers work but he's a fast learner) Feeding? No problemo. Getting up in the middle of the night to do both of those things? His sleep schedule's already fucked, this shit ain't new.

When it comes to parenting and raising the kid, though... that's definitely where Adam struggles. He'd struggle with bonding. A lot. Adam mostly talks about things that you really shouldn't say around children, much less bond over. I think he'd be better at just letting the kid ramble while he's just sitting there, fully engrossed in whatever bullshit his child is saying. He's not just passively listening with little 'uh-huh's and nods, this man is active in the discussion. Have you ever heard a small child speak? They say the most random shit ever, and Adam would love it. It's peak entertainment to him. Even if it's just incoherent babbling, he'll have full-on conversations with this baby.

He'd definitely have some shared interests as the kid gets older. I think Adam's favorite shows/movies are a mix of action movies and shit like Power Rangers. He's not ashamed of it either—'fuck you, the Power Rangers are fuckin' cool.' This also goes for video games. I know that man is a toxic COD gamer boy and you can't prove me wrong. Basically, the only thing that keeps him from becoming one of those husbands that locks himself away in a man cave to play video games is the fact that he can game with his kid.

And once they get into school, he just gets really invested in the drama. Elementary school drama is such bullshit, and it'd be the best reality TV he's ever seen. "Oh, don't tell me—it's that bitch Cindy. The fuck did that little shit do this time?" He'd be gasping like it's a damn soap opera. 'Oh no she didn't!' kinda vibe.

He'd talk so much shit around his kid about the parents of their classmates, the teachers, anyone. Then the kid would repeat it and Adam would get sat down in the office with his kid like: "Your child said, and I quote, 'My dad says your mom's a bitch.'" "What? She fuckin' is." And yeah, he's not wrong - some of those parents are fucking nightmares.

If his kid got in trouble for fighting, his reaction would depend on the situation. If it was unprovoked and/or a part of bullying, he'd originally laugh it off but would be freaking the fuck out internally. He's probably a little traumatized by what happened with Cain and Abel. But if the fighting was an act of defense (whether of themselves or someone else) he would be the proudest dad ever. Fist-bumps his kid in the office in full view of the principal.

You cannot trust this man to give his kid the sex talk. It just will not go well. Like, if his kid needs advice when they're older (basically anything beyond 'where do babies come from') then he's your guy, but it's still gonna be awkward and uncomfortable. He'd probably have Lute handle most of those issues just so he doesn't have to know about his kid's sex life but can still trust that they have a responsible(?) adult if they have questions.

In terms of where Adam is lacking as a parent, there's a few areas in particular to focus on.

Emotional availability? Not his strong suit. At all. He can't deal with his own feelings, let alone his kid's. Most of the emotional support will be coming from his partner. That doesn't mean he doesn't try. But he can't show it with words all that well. He'll show emotional support in other ways—quality time, gifts, and acts of service for the most part. Like going out for ice cream, watching a movie, etc.

He's not good with discipline. To him, everything's no big deal. If his kid hasn't killed their sibling, that's good enough for him! Generally, his partner will choose when/how to discipline (with Adam's input ofc), but Adam's job is to just enforce it/not overrule it. He's 100% the type to be sneaky about it tho. If his kid is grounded, he'll go out with them to give them a break from being stuck in the house, y'know, stuff like that. Because of this, his kid forms a closer, different kind of bond than with Adam's partner. It's more friendly, I guess is the word? Like, his kid won't go to him for actual helpful advice, but if they fuck up somehow or are in a bad situation that they kinda got themselves into (drinking, car accident, etc.), then Adam is the parent they call.

I think Adam's peak parenting era would be when his kid is a late teen/young adult. 'Cause then he can actually be himself, for the most part. His personality is not very kid-friendly, so once his kid isn't really much of a kid anymore—he is so fucking excited. His relationship with his kid would be a lot more unconventional as they grow older. Like, he's really close with his kid once they're an adult. (totally not basing this off my relationship with my mom) His advice would be shit, but he'd give it if his kid needed it!

Definitely the type to text his kid more often than most parents. Mostly because he texts more like them and has the same sense of humor. Lots of shitty memes.

Also!! I think Adam would definitely make time for his partner. Date nights are a must. His kid better get comfortable with sleepovers at friends' houses or getting babysat by Emily 'cause he ain't letting parenthood fuck up his sex life.

I think that's all I got. Not sure how to end this so uh... shoutout to all you bitches with daddy issues lmao

Taglist: @little-miss-chaoss @fakeguysarehot @3sire-777

[honeyhivess]

i can't help falling in love with you <3

first 3 overblot boys falling in love with gender neutral reader

tags: cursing, might be ooc i am new to writing them

riddle rosehearts <3

riddle would only be open to dating someone after his overblot, he's such a stickler for the rules and didn't allow himself to truly let go and have fun until after the blot incident

he would be really scared to get into a relationship because of his parents, mostly his mom

he didn't want to get older and become his mother and treat his significant other like she treated him

you would probably have to be really close to him for him to start liking you tbh

the realization honestly hits him in the middle of the night

after doing his nightly routine he got into bed and relaxed, thinking over the unbirthday party that happened that night

adeuce had invited you to attend since you helped paint the roses, and since riddle had a bit of a soft spot for you by now he happily allowed it

you had a chair on one of the long sides of the table, closest to his chair at the head

late in the night his mind kept replaying you laughing at one of trey's bad jokes

oh shit.

riddle would be eyes open, staring at the wall in realization

the warmth he felt in his chest remembering your bright smile that day had him pleasantly overwhelmed

he never had the chance to crush on anyone else before since his mom so heavily sheltered him

this feeling came to him unknown and he was confused

he had a hard time falling asleep that night, and the next morning he immediately rushed to trey

after being teased a bit and prodded a bit more he realized he liked you

which, scared him

a couple days after he found out just what those feelings meant, he would have a hard time facing you

he didn't know what to do with this newfound information

you would have to confront him and make him tell you why he was borderline avoiding you

his face is RED red

he wouldn't stutter and would still kinda talk normally, but it would be more rushed

"Prefect... I've had the realization that I, really like you... If you would indulge me, I would love to take you out sometime...?"

leona kingscholar <3

...eh

lions normally have a pride of females, so leona is kinda used to flirting and romance

however, he is the bastard second born, so he isn't used to being the center of attention

when he met you, he saw an opportunity to have the chance at romancing someone without his brother looming over his shoulder

you hadn't even HEARD of his brother, which meant you couldn't even really pick falena over him

this excited leona a lot, so he got really territorial over you really fast

he would also put quite a bit of effort into wooing you, well, more than normal

he really tries to make himself just generally more appealing

he's nicer when you're around and started taking care of himself a bit more

it's a subtle change to you, but he gets DESTROYED by ruggie

when he initially realized he liked you he didn't have any big reaction

he's been through a couple relationships prior to you so it's not really anything new to him

you will start being dragged into his schemes more

also known as i really hope you like napping because you're about to get crushed

he drags you into his naps a lot, and he lays directly on top of you

you will not escape.

also he starts giving you a lot of things, gifts, food, clothing

he's not a hopeless romantic so don't really expect any super grand gestures

he also doesn't really confess? he kinda just asks you out

confessing is lame to him, it's juvenile

"Ay, herbivore? You free this saturday? You better be, I need a date to this dumb restaurant."

azul ashengrotto <3

motherfucker is NOT confessing first

i really hate to break it to you, but after his childhood, he does not have the confidence for that

now, azul may not confess, but he will flirt

...badly...

when he realized he kinda panicked and was immediately overwhelmed with worst case scenarios

he does not think you would ever like him, when he was younger he tried confessing to someone and got laughed at

so that kinda crushed him

jade and floyd would not be told, but they would notice very quickly

azul gets flustered when you're around and you get offered discounts occasionally

at first they thought azul wanted something materialistic from you

no he just wants your hand in marriage

they immediately become his wingmen, but

they are kinda the world's worst wingmen

jade is actually pretty good at highlighting azuls charms and good traits, but he also loves embarrassing azul in front of you

floyd is, floyd

he's a bit louder and much less subtle

and when combined they just start embarrassing azul, the poor octo-mer is dying

now, if you start hinting towards liking azul back, it is on

he immediately goes back into his smooth personality and he will start flirting with you

it starts of subtle, but it will become more apparent as time goes on

if you're really lucky and catch him on a good day, he'll ask you out

he'll invite you to monstro lounge, no one else will be there and you will be treated like royalty

jade would be the one serving you and floyd would be watching very intently from the kitchen

everything is on the house, just for you

"Have whatever you'd like, Prefect. This is all but a little taste of what more is to come."

a/n: i had so much fun writing azuls, i love octavinelle so much asdfghjk

[mortalityplays]

This is a very good illustration of the increasing susceptibility to conspiratorial thought patterns I've been seeing on the left lately. Just because you don't believe there are space marines on Mars doesn't mean you're immune to building imaginary connections between aesthetic or emotional data points and mistaking them for evidence. A lot of well meaning people in my circles have been sharing this story, buying uncritically into the first narrative they encountered. I want to break down why:

Jones' twitter thread was extremely emotional and extremely urgent. The idea of a child being ripped away from his frantic mother and a ticking clock to decide his fate both helped the story to bypass analytical scrutiny. It sends the message 'act now, before it's too late, it's the only compassionate thing to do'.

Her connection to an existing conspiracy (a concerted effort by the state to cover up Covid statistics) creates a strengthening association with the idea that this is also a conspiracy. The thread offers no positive evidence that her son's arrest was a conspiracy, and no positive evidence that his arrest has any connection to her prior experiences.

Jones' allegation that the arrest was retribution for her actions as a whistleblower implicitly identifies her in the reader's mind. A lot could be unpacked about her dispute with the DOH but it doesn't really matter because I don't think most people who circulated this story knew much about it either way. The point is that it anchors her identity in a few key concepts: 'whistleblower', 'covid scientist', 'concerned citizen'. None of these qualities are relevant to the events detailed in the thread (or evidenced in the thread, if we're being really rigorous), but they unconsciously prejudice the reader's assessment of whether to trust or side with her. Simply put, if you are concerned about how covid was handled and/or inclined to support whistleblowers, you are more likely to assume she's credible.

If you dislike and distrust cops, you are primed to accept a narrative in which they are doing something straightforwardly evil. Don't get me wrong, fuck 12, but I say that armed with an enormous preponderance of cases in which we have positive evidence of police acting out of self interest, cruelty, corruption, racism, misogyny, etc. Allowing ourselves to be seduced by the fantasy that they are always always without fail breaking rules and fashing it up in broad daylight only makes us easier to delude and manipulate.

She repeatedly made the point that her son is autistic. Again, if you are autistic or sympathetic to autistic people, you are more likely to be 'warmed up' by this detail and inclined to take her side. I'm not going to say it's irrelevant to the idea that he was being unfairly targeted, but it is overwhelmingly emotionally weighted. And again, it is not evidence that he was unfairly targeted. It's another weight on the scale that tips you to judge the truth value of her story without reality checking.

The example of a meme that she shared is characteristic of a type of online humour that is at least familiar to most of us. If you or your friends make edgy jokes and share tasteless irony memes, or if you've been online for more than like a week, you understand that they're mostly harmless. The idea that this meme could be used as evidence by law enforcement to detain you is ideologically threatening in an immediately relatable way. It evokes a reflex defensive impulse — that's not fair, the cops are wrong, the kid is innocent — bypassing the process of verification. Is this meme the reason he was arrested? Is it the only one he posted? Is it the only reason he was arrested?

All of these factors create a gut-led constellation of information that quickly forms a picture. Because it is being pieced together from multiple subconscious feelings and prejudices, it feels as if it has been evidenced. Because the thread was highly emotional and highly urgent, readers were pressured to jump to rapid conclusions and ask "what can I do to help?" (and the answer, as it almost always is, was 'donate money, quick').

I want to be really clear that I am not saying Jones manufactured any of these effects on purpose. It would be completely within reason that having a young child arrested would send anyone into an emotional tailspin, grasping for reasons this might have happened, leaping to his defense, rallying resources to fight on his behalf. I am not in any way ascribing malice to her actions.

What I'm interested in is the effect that this emotive kneejerk appeal had on people who were unknowingly predisposed to believe that the state of Florida would kidnap a child to punish a scientist for disagreeing with the department of health about covid statistics. That is a baseless conspiracy theory, and a huge number of people in my immediate circles reflexively amplified it.

Personally, I think arrest is a godawful way to respond to a child having a mental health crisis, even if they are seen to pose a violent threat. That still doesn't mean the cops did it at the bidding of a mad dictator in waiting. In the hypothetical parallel universe where it turns out Jones was right and this was all a conspiracy to punish her, it still would not have served the situation to jump to that conclusion on a gut feeling.

Pausing to identify relevant, verifiable facts before sharing a story like this is always warranted, even if you think the person telling it is 'on your side'. The more you worry that questioning the narrative wastes precious time or makes you a bad person, the more you should scrutinise why you are being made to feel that way. Accepting unfounded conspiracies into your worldview is not benign, even if you think the 'targets' deserve it. It erodes your critical perspective and turns you into a vector for the people around you.

tl;dr: you are not immune to baseless conspiratorial thought

[dent-de-leon]

I could be wrong, but--just thinking about how the twins assumed it was obvious Mollymauk was heading to a brothel. How he clearly knows that, lets them believe that--"I know what the others think, but..." And all this time when he sneaks out in the dead of night, he's really playing the hero, running off to protect someone in need.

And just, I don't know. I think about how Mollymauk was so devoted to Lestera, and we never see him actually indulge in a relationship with anyone else in the comic. How he's still so lonely, and tells Yasha so in a moment of vulnerability--when she catches him in the midst of Choir Practice, this side of him he doesn't let anyone else see. He admits to her that, "The world is harsh and cruel, and I don't seem to be able to just walk on by. You see a wrong? You fix it."

And then when Yasha says she'll stay with him, help him, that's when Molly lets a bit more of his true feelings bleed through. "Suppose I could use the company. I am recently out of a relationship the hard way..." He lets it play off like a joke, but it's incredibly sad and personal. I've lost someone too, he says. I'm lonely too. He doesn't quite know what Yasha's been through, but he can feel the kind of grief and pain she carries. Knows enough to know she's also been dealt a harsh loss, that they both know what it means to feel Empty and lonely.

Thinking about. Molly being a tease and a flirt, but never seeming to commit. Jester listening in on his antics in the Pillow Trove, and Taliesin saying, "It's mostly ridiculous conversation through this whole thing."

Thinking about Caleb and Fjord watching Molly flirt in Hupperdook, both of them assuming he'll run off to have some fun for the night.

Travis: "I turn to Caleb and go, 'I think I may be regretting my roommate choice for the night. It's just a hunch. I think he's in his element.'"

Liam: "Well, the odds are that you're not even going to see him in your room tonight, so I wouldn't worry about it so much."

Travis: "You think? He'll just like, tear off into the night and not come back until the sun comes up?"

Liam: "He's like a coyote. You know what that is?...Yeah, they like to fuck a lot, is my point--"

And they're being ridiculous and half joking, and Molly happily encourages it, but--it still feels like how Mollymauk lets the twins make assumptions. Like the most he does is a bit of playful teasing and some charming words. At the end of the night, he's still back in his room with Fjord--carrying Fjord to their room, because the poor guy's passed out drunk.

Thinking about how Lucien's personality was another facet of Molly's, how they can both be so silver-tongued and disarmingly charming. How Lucien cared for his late lover so much, and how he never found another partner. (He still flirts with Caleb though. Molly's still a part of him, so of course he does. But that is something Lucien also tries to keep his distance from, to keep fun and teasing. Trying so hard not to think about how the forehead kiss Molly gave his wizard feels far too much like his own goodbye to his fallen partner--)

And Mollymauk absolutely having those feelings for his magician. Those feelings ever enduring, even after Lucien, even after another death and rebirth. "Oh, you're cute, Magic Man--" And even then, Molly never actually gets to take that chance. To tell Caleb how he feels. It means something, I think, that he becomes bolder and more forward with his wizard when he wakes as Kingsley. No longer carrying his past lives' loss and grief and painful memories.

I think that's where Molly was always headed, honestly. There's so many parallels to how both Molly and Yasha lost their partner before the campaign, how they each try to cope with that in their own way. And, like how Yasha eventually opened up to Beau, eventually healed to the point where she was willing to start another relationship--I think Molly was gradually warming to that point with Caleb.

Realizing there was someone else he wanted to let into his heart, that he could find happiness again and it would be what Lestera would have wanted. It also seems like Molly was holding himself back from that a bit because he felt Caleb wasn't ready; still so withdrawn and closed off, not yet ready for the pain and vulnerability of another relationship. But, he wants to wait. For Caleb, he's willing to wait. For lifetime after lifetime. And that to me is the proof that Lestera and Caleb were Molly's only true loves, I think. Aside from dear Yasha, of course--his kindred spirit, platonic soulmate--

But romantically, I don't think he ever gave his whole heart to anyone the way he did for them. It speaks volumes to me, that when King wakes with little to no memories, it's still Lestera and Caleb his heart longs for. When he dreams of the circus, he immediately starts asking about her, over and over, "There was a--oh. There was a circus. And a...a beautiful woman, in a red coat. She was telling me secrets, showing me how to keep secrets. Show secrets--I...Where's the woman? No, not her...where's the woman--"

Thinking about how Kingsley still woke with feelings for Caleb too. Immediately told him he was cute, started biting his lip. Can't help flirting even in their last scene together, "Magic Man. Looking good." How Caleb was someone Molly ached for even when Lucien had his soul caged and tormented, "Caleb. Softness and light."

Like, I could be wrong, but. I don't know. I just don't think Molly had quite as much relationship experience that everyone imagined. And instead of having a string of lovers, it feels more like he just liked to give the illusion of it. A romantic who loved with his whole heart, and only really gave it to a close few--

[factual-fantasy]

27 asks/walls of text where I ramble about FNAF <XDD

@ninaandthegames

AAAA THANK YOU SO MUCH!! 😭😭💗💗

@taizarack

Actually I have 2 swap AUs. A true swap and a partial swap. In the partial swap, only Chica and Freddy switch places with Foxy and Bonnie respectively. The rest of the characters and world are slightly altered because of this change, but otherwise the story continues as normal. With Gregory coming to the Pizzaplex and the overall back story of the AU remaining the same.

Meanwhile in the true swap, which I haven't drawn yet.. everyone is paired with someone and swaps places with them. Freddy and Bonnie swap, Chica and Foxy swap, Roxy and Monty swap, even DJ and DA swap. And most importantly, Gregory and Vanessa swap. Which means that everyone's role and design are completely swapped.

And this means that Gregory is the adult sus security guard, and Vanessa is the scared little child living in the basement.. 👀👀

@jackal-lantern

I'm glad you like my Octonauts and submas stuff! :DD I was actually just thinking about Ingo and Emmet funnily enough XD I've been considering finally committing and playing Legends: Arceus, so that I can learn more about that world and Ingo. Also so that I could come back with more knowledge about the twins and make a proper AU :00

@ash-attxck

Thank you for asking first! And as long as it isn't directly taking my idea, then yeah that sounds fine to me! :}}

That would be cool yeah! :0

@toaster-os

To be completely honest, the multiple arms thing is mostly just a running joke <XD

But also magically growing a 3rd arm when ever I need it is very convenient XDD

@voids-call

That's a good question, hmm.. Well, I guess I'll go in order.

Gregory's fears cant really be revealed for lore reasons, but Freddy's can. Freddy has a lot of fear surrounding Gregory. He fears for Gregory's safety, his health.. but most of all, he's afraid of the others finding about about Gregory. If the others found out about him, surly they'd call security, right? If that happens Gregory would be taken away by Vanessa. Which would destroy Freddy..

Now Chica, Roxy, Monty, Foxy and Bonnie don't.. really have a #1 biggest fear that I can point out exactly.. or at least I cant think of any atm..

But DJMM? He doesn't have a biggest fear per se, but he is worried sick about the Daycare attendant. He hasn't seen him in months by this point. And no one has really told him anything straight. He has no idea why he's been gone for so long and if he's okay or not.. :(

And DA's biggest fear is definitely being caught in the dark. He knows very well that something is wrong with him and that he doesn't act like himself when in his moon mode. So he is terrified of the dark and does everything in his power to avoid it..

@andysalleyway

I do know of monster high actually! :00 I think its pretty neat, I've seen a lot of dolls being customized by Dollightful on YouTube. I highly recommend her! (Totally not a Dollightful advertisement XDDD)

(Post in question)

Thank you so much! :DD I'm a bit late to respond to this ask <XD But I'm all better now. My cold is gone and my leg healed up nicely :}}

And the cones name is Cody! :D

@burningmusicfunnygiant (Post in question)

Monty and Roxy do look different in this AU, although they still run the Golf course and Raceway respectively.

As for the bots meeting their other selves.. I image swap Monty would be rather surprised by his counter parts severe temper. OG Monty is so crushed by grief and shame that he's just constantly angry and lashing out. Also because of his shame he has closed himself off all these years which has only made his anger worse..

In the swap AU, Foxy was there for Monty. They became best friends and really helped each other through the grief and pain. Foxy helped Monty with his anger and in present day he's a really mellow person. Just sore with grief but not angry.

Meeting the others as well, OG Bonnie would be surprised by how.. mean his swapped form is.

Swapped Bonnie comes off as a real jerk. If you try to talk to him he'll either just stand there with a vacant stare and refuse to look at or talk to you. Or he'll be short and rude with you and just overall have a vibe that says "I don't want to talk to you, leave me alone". After every performance he just sneaks off to his room and stays there all night. If anyone tries to talk to him about coming out of his room more often or engaging with the group, he just snaps back. Telling them to leave him alone. His and Foxy's friendship has greatly suffered in this AU..

OG Bonnie would be floored by this version of himself. Bonnie would never speak to his friends like that. He would never brush them off if they were standing outside his door in tears. Begging to just talk to him. He couldn't believe the way his other self was acting..

But the thing is, Swapped Bonnie is just under an extreme amount of stress and pressure. He is an Animatronic that was designed only for smaller groups and a more quiet environment. He is a naturally slow animatronic and has a really relaxed personality. The only times he would be put on stage in front of a big crowd is every few weeks or so when the band would do a big performance together. Then right after it was back to the slow and relaxed bowling ally..

But after Freddy's accident, he was put on stage in Freddy's place. Bonnie is now on stage every day. Huge crowds, lights, noise, constantly on the move, go go go, noise noise noise- Bonnie come do this- Bonnie take this picture- Bonnie sing these 3 songs- Bonnie move that- Bonnie come over here- Bonnie sing happy birthday- Bonnie its time for another performance- Like-- it never ends!!

So whenever Bonnie has the time, he just completely shuts down. If he has a 5 minute break to just stand here? He's going to stand completely still and not do or say anything. If he gets to go to his room, he's going to turn off the lights and sit in complete silence for as long as he can. Any time anyone tries to talk to him he just pushes them away. The last thing he wants to do in his free time is more talking, more processing, more movement. He just wants to be where its dark and quiet..

Swap Bonnie is being pushed to his absolute processing limit, every. single. day. If you were constantly being overwhelmed and pushed beyond your limit every single day, for years? Well you'd probably be a grump and just wants some peace and quiet too..

I could go on with the others, but these paragraphs are already super long- <XD Maybe in another ask if anyone is interested!

@random-entity-363

In the OG au and the Partial swap AU, Sun and Moon are the same person. There are no separate animatronics or separate personalities. The "bug" just only really seems to effect DA when he's in his moon costume. And in the Partial swap, no it doesn't effect his Sunny side..

Although in the true swap? It might actually switch and effect his sunny side instead.. 👀👀

Foxy! :}}

@pinkbomb08

I have fully recovered from my cold, thank you! :} And you got it right! Foxy is Gregory's favorite character and he takes Freddy's role in protecting him :}}

@mr-damian-s-power

:DD Thank you so much!! I would like to come back sometime and do a deeper dive into the Wario bros. I had so many ideas for them that I never got around to.. <:/

@k-art8901

Bibi is a boy! :}

Aw, comparing yourself to people you perceive as better isn't going to help you feel better.. <:( Just keep trudging on with your own work and you'll improve over time. I believe in you! :}}

@joeyjambo122

Oh yeah, I've seen Bluey alllll over the place XD It seems like a really wholesome show! I've seen a lot of clips and art of it, although I haven't really gotten into it or watched it myself. My go to pre-school type show is Octonauts <XD

Maybe someday! :}}

:DD Thank you so much! Maybe I'll come back around to it sometime! :}}

@ur0neand0nly

0___o; Well uhh... so here's the thing about Paani. No offence to anyone who likes him, but personally? I reeeeeaaaaalllly don't like Paani. :x

The first episode just gave me a really sour taste in my mouth. And I just haven't been able to like him since 😅

I have intentions to add him to my Octonauts stuff in the future. But what I plan to do is re-write/make an AU about above and beyond which involves uh.. removing everything I don't like about it.. Including Paani. :x

I mean he'll still in it!-- But my AU will completely rewrite his character and remove all the things that people criticize him for. He will basically be Paani 2.0, and will be a completely different character... I feel bad for wiping his personality clean off my AU, but maaaaan I just cant like Paani, sorry! 😭😭

@hexyz09

I might not be understanding the question here, so my apologies-

My Gregory and canon Gregory are very different characters for a few reasons. For one, I completely rewrote the events of the game so they did not experience the same things while at the Pizzaplex.

I also made up a backstory for my Gregory that justifies him being more shy and skittish then canon Gregory seems to be.

I also didn't like how evil/gremlin-ly Gregory is in canon/fanon. So I thought screw it, I don't like canon/fanon Gregory being a lil turd, so I'm just going to make my own Gregory that acts the way I want him to <XD

@flowers-on-my-eyes

XD Aw, that's a nice idea. But poor Bonnie might be embarrassed to have a hook put on his stubby arm. It might just make him look tacky and draw more attention to it. Poor Foxy might have to keep his hook for now :x

You know, Bonnie likely did have a few custom bowling balls made just for him. But who knows where they are now.. Rockstar row? Somewhere in the bowling ally? In a box in the basement somewhere? They may never know.. :(

@euanpc

Aww!! That's so cute! Wet floor cone buddy for the win!!! 💗💗

Thank you! 😎😎😎

[fandomfluffandfuck]

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASEEEE WRITE SOMETHING WITH TOUCH STARVED WINTER SOLDIER AND MALE HANDLER READER (or stevie, whatever floats ur boat) I AM DESPERATEEEE

I've kind of written something with touch starved, early-deprogramming Bucky and Steve--"Don't Forget To Remember Me"--so, I'll go ahead with the x-reader part of this prompt here!

Mentions of HYDRA cruelty below the cut, nothing exactly "on screen." This is mostly angsty fluff, actually.

You aren't sure when it began because no matter how deeply you scrub your mind for clues, shifting through the heavy rubble of your time with "S.H.I.E.LD" going from a regular recruit to being drug into the ugly underbelly with the grimy cockroaches of HYDRA, there isn't a clear path. Perhaps it started when you were assigned the joke grunt work of waxing the asset's chest (x). Or, maybe, it really started after you had been shown to do a satisfactory enough job at stripping the asset to naked flesh, so then you were assigned to deal with the knots that had developed at the back of the asset's neck. Told to rip a wide tooth comb through its mane as the thought occurred to you that, huh, it felt a lot like when you used to have to do this for your younger sisters after a summer of wild, young shenanigans. Hollering at the top of your lungs late into the hot evenings. Swimming for hours in pools and lakes and any bodies of water you could get yourselves to, almost always with wrinkled fingertips, baths or oceans or anything just to feel the cool lapping water. Playing chase, flying out the doors of the house when your parents had finally had enough of bulls in their china shop. Running through fields into forests, racing to climbing trees and hopefully not tumble out of them and end up in a cast (again). Summers with the weather too nice and the sun staying suspended in the sky for hours, so you were too busy for silly things like brushing hair. You were only saved by the fact that your mother insisted on buzzing your hair to the scalp for summers, no need to brush that. Your sisters didn't have the luxury.

It's kind of like those times with your sisters--raking a comb through the soldier's unkept hair.

Once, with late, mature summer bleeding into gestating fall, the colors fading and muddling, you found your sisters hair had become too tangled to undo, so you complained, and your parents had made her get her hair cut. She balled her eyes out after they proclaimed it, stuttering and pleading, her thin chest heaving, just try mooore! The knots got in! They can get out! But no. They couldn't come undone. She would have to deal with it and learn to take care of her hair better or she could have her hair buzzed seasonally like you. (She was not thrilled, even if that was at a time when she looked up to you, her big brother, her hero)

Working harshly through the asset's mane is sort of like that. But not.

Really not.

You are never gentle with the soldier like you were with your baby sisters.

Left with the asset, you were instructed to tear the knots out, be as unkind (or cruel, if you like) as needed. Just get them out of the way. Tear them out. Lather them up and comb through. Buzz them off with clippers. And if the asset acts up, use a knife--it doesn't have to be just on its hair, you can't hurt it that bad, so don't think twice.

So...

Yeah, maybe it started then. Somewhere negligible and nebulous between the waxing of its chest and combing-slash-cutting of its locks.

If it started then, that would make sense, because now, whenever the soldier and you are alone for whatever reason (or nonreason), it crawls into your lap like some kind of desperate, feral raccoon. A creature that's dirty and trembling and, somehow, hungry enough to be entirely reckless, directly approaching the human who owns the trash cans it's rummaging through, trying to find anything to stuff into its mouth of rotten, putrid teeth.

And what are you to do in these times, alone with a lapful of weapon?

Typically, when it happens, the soldier seems too fragile to push away. If it is animated--thawed and moving of it's own volition--the asset is often fresh from a mission where you know it's been run ragged, barely fed, hardly given time to rest. As is protocol. So, it is fragile.

This time in particular, though, it's been so recently wiped you can still smell the sharp bleach and dull undercurrent of electricity wafting off of it, supposedly clean yet faintly fried. Acidic. Almost the smell of lazer hair removal but on steriods. Your lip curls up involuntarily at the stench. You always have a moment of hesitation when it does this. And this time is no exception.

You remind yourself that this will make your future grunt work easier. Right? That's why you accept this strange ritual. Isn't it? It's okay for you to lay your hands on the asset if it's part of your job. You will not be punished for it, nor will the asset. Right? This is just like waxing it's chest, combing it's hair, or adjusting its tac gear. Isn't it?

With it's surprisingly light weight in your lap, you do not viciously grab, digging your nails into it's flesh and scars and metal; nor do you slap or hit or pull, rather you set your hands on it's grimy, sweaty back. More evidence of it's recent wiping alongside it's still trembling muscles. Thick sweat overeating involuntary twitches so sharp it looks painful and unnatural, more like a robot jolting than an organic thing moving. Contortions. Convulsions.

With your hands on it's upper back and shoulder, the soldier makes a sound like metal creaking, bent too far, about to snap, warning the manipulator of the impending give. Shards will fly.

You do not feel threatened.

The asset is bent, nearly broken after it's mission and the maintenance after. It cannot hurt you. You could hurt it easily with its fragility and brittleness. Except, you don't intend to hurt it now or any other time when you are alone together. Instead, you allow the minutes to tick by before heavy footfalls announce the entrance of another cockroach, crawling out to shove the asset back into the freezer before scurrying away.

In your spare change minutes, you bizarrely reward the asset and it's starved raccoon behavior, rubbing the cold coins together, if the noises the soldier makes are anything to go by. Metal on metal. Rubbing. Rusty, almost whines as your hands sweep slowly down it's back, following the line of it's bent out of shape spine all the way down to the top of his tac pants that they've left on it this time.

Under your hands, it is only quivering lines of flesh, muscle, and bone shot through with harder callouses of thick scars and metal. If you go based off feeling alone, you would assume that the asset has already been broken--bent past the natural give sheet metal has to it--with all the shrapnel left in it's body. It has bent, snapped, and shattered. The feeling of the asset, by virtue of how rough and sharply-edged it is, makes your movements turn slower and even more gentle, you couldn't make your hands turn cruel if you tried.

You're nearly massaging the creature now, and you can't help but notice how cold it is as you touch it, rubbing its back, shoulders, and the nape of its neck. Every time this ritual unfurls, you notice. It is strange. Shouldn't a soldier with impeccable healing and speed and strength unfurling run much hotter? It puzzles you, but so do many of the things about the asset and the cockroaches that puppet it, crawling inside it, filling its frame with an infestation. Why does it do anything? You have no room to wonder, though, because why do you do anything they say, anyway? How did you get here? What would your baby sister's think of this? What would the wild, summer-sweetened boy you used to be think of this?

The asset creaks again, bringing you back to this ritual. It's pushing it's spasming back into your hands. You sigh, finding, feeling, a knot deep in the muscle below its metal shoulder. You are unwilling to tenderize the muscle, untangling the knot, because it would hurt. You've had deep tissue massages. They do not feel good. The mission and maintenance of the soldier are fresh in your mind and inhaled through your nostrils, so you can not bring yourself to add to its pain.

The best you can do, not adding pain, is some skin-deep soothing. Nothing more. You cannot change much. In parallel, you and the asset are stuck. What you can do is keep the asset's hair tangle-free, you can opt to shave the asset instead of wax it, and you can give into it's hunger. Sometimes. When it's safe to do so. If the cockroaches have the power to blend the soldier's brain into a slurry of nothing but obedience, they can do the same to you. If the cockroaches can twist and alter the precise balance of homeostasis to a sickly chill with injections that burn so badly inside the asset that it has to be held down, risking broken bones and torn muscles, than they can do anything. Everything.

So, shockingly, it is with a weapon lying across your lap--used against humanity as a precise knife between the ribs, slotting into the heart of men who represent hope and uprising and future--that you relocate your own organic nature. Your compassion. Your morals. Your humanness.

And if you leave the lock to the cage containing the asset for the last few hours before he goes back on ice open... that is been you and the asset you have cradled and held and come to know as organic and human despite the metal forced to be a part of him.

You can only hope the asset seizes the opportunity. A way out. The chance to reclaim the humanity it--he has been stripped of.

[bluestarjay]

Mmmm, here's something easy for today,, I woke up late, and I've run out of pre prepared ship content,,,

I think kamideku is such a cute rare pair, and I've been SO obsessed with them lately bc they actually have a lot in common, and they just work together so well.

One of the most common get-together tropes for them is study dates/sessions, which I love, bc deku is really smart, but also understanding abt adhd and whatnot, so it's a sweet thing for them to study together, and for kami to realize that deku hasn't once made a joke about him being stupid. In fact, deku mentions that he's *smart*? He doesn't understand it at first, but deku tells him that it's because he has a really good understanding of how things work; he's just not good at processing and translating thoughts onto paper properly. But since deku also has adhd, but more manageable, he helps him out.

Furthermore, they both have lightning. Technically. Deku's isn't like lightning lightning, but it has the appearance of it, ykwim?? I don't really know much about how to explain it, or what it actually is, if not lightning, but we all know what I'm talking about,,, I think,,, but imagine kami going "you have lightning too??" And they just kinda bond over how cool electricity quirks are even though Deku's isn't actually electricity. Most fics of them involve them gushing over pro heroes too which is so cute I love ittt

Since deku's closet is mostly just t shirts, shorts, jeans, and just really casual stuff, and kami's has a lot more nicer and alternative stuff, deku borrows his clothes sometimes. In the dorms, deku's has become a lot less all might themed (mainly bc I hate his room sm), and there's a lot more new wave/alternative 2000s elements, more similar to kami's. Kami has some new all might merch in his dorm. They also have shared spotify playlists.

I saw a post under the kamideku tag saying that his electricity would be really good for deku's joint pain, which I love sm, like, imagine them cuddling, and kami just sends little jolts out to soothe his pain??? Kami just gushes to every person imagineable abt how cool and strong and awesome his bf is, and deku gets flustered and tells him to stop. In that one episode, kami mentions something he shouldn't have ( possibly about stain? Not sure, tho), and deku says, "'Minari! ☹️😟" 😭😭😭

People really need to make more content of them. omg there's sm cute stuff on them, but not nearly enough!!!!