#this is canon I'm Hoyo

[starcurtain]

Please someone redraw this with Dr. Ratio and Aventurine because this is the exact vibe they have in my head post-Penacony.

[azaliyas]

(edit) DISCLAIMER: i KNOW that what kafka said in these screenshots is probably a lie, yet i decided to blatantly and willingly ignore it because i have my own ideas, theories and hcs. so don't think this is canon, it's probably not, but for me it is bcs of my hcs. thank you.

if y'all are not interested/don't play/didn't play yet hsr, specifically kafka's companion mission, then skip this post cuz i need to go crazy about the woman and so there will be spoilers

and now

MOTHER MOTHERED AND I'M SO FUCKING HAPPY YOU DONT KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE THE KAFKA-MC RELATIONSHIP AND NOW THAT THIS HAS BEEN CONFIRMED I'M 1000000 TIMES HAPPIER SHES CANONICALLY OUR MOTHER OUR DATA IS HER DATA IDKAISIAOAKA AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH

and also

DOES THIS MEAN WE STAYED BY KAFKA'S SIDE TO LEARN AND BE CARED FOR BY HER BEFORE WE SPAWNED AT THE SPACE STATION IN ORDER TO UNCONSCIOUSLY FOLLOW ELIO'S SCRIPT I HAVE MY OWN THEORIES LIKE EOSKSIAOAKKAAK I'M YELLING SO MUCH THIS IS AMAZING I'M SO SOWOISOWKWOWKAK

[daz4i]

hey yeah how IS ratio putting on his alabaster head when it seems to be smaller than his actual head. is he like a barbie or smth

[feroluce]

Some off the cuff 1k of Skirk & Tartaglia (skirtaru???) hcs before 4.2 proves me wildly wrong, they are very much a dynamic in process to be changed as we see more of them and as I think and consider them more, but I wanna see them interact so BAD.

Anyway. Tartaglia is an idiot who develops a crush, or at least something like a crush, on anyone who can give him a good fight. Obviously there are plenty of people who can just kick his ass- he's ranked at the bottom of the Harbingers. But they all suck, and there's no passion when they fight! They don't appreciate it the way Tartaglia does! So it's not a good fight and those assholes don't count!

So I think little Tartaglia was doomed the second he saw a very very pretty lady with a very very sharp sword and she immediately beat the shit out of him. Like she awakened something in him right then and there, unfortunately for the rest of the world haha

And then! Not only could she beat him one handed! But she took the time to teach him! And this! This was exactly what Tartaglia had wanted when he ran away from home with nothing but some food and his sword! He'd wanted an adventure! He'd wanted something new and different and wild!

And he can have that now, with Skirk and the Abyss! So his crush could have instantly dissolved right there, but it didn't, because Skirk was weird and interesting and Tartaglia adored that.

((Wheezing imagining Tartaglia trying to show off because he wants to impress his shifu, and she genuinely is impressed because Tartaglia progressed so fast, but then she pops his teenage boy ego with a pin and he deflates sjzjnskdkz))

He develops such an endless amount of respect and admiration for her. He's so happy and so proud of himself when he masters the Foul Legacy, because this was a goal laid by his shifu and hell yeah, he blew it out of the water!! And I'd like to think this was when Skirk said those words in his profile-

"You shall ever be the eye of the storm,"

"And the clashing of steel shall ever accompany you."

"The pitch-black memory of stepping into uttermost darkness,"

"Shall, at last, become the strength by which you will overturn this world."

-with Tartaglia knelt before her and her sword at his cheek, as though she were knighting him. And Tartaglia realizes then that oh. He likes it here. He likes being in the Abyss. He likes being with Skirk. He likes hunting and killing and surviving here in the Abyss with Skirk. Morepesok is and will always be home, but it was stagnant there. Too much of the same. No room for growth.

But the Abyss is boundless possibility to explore in every direction, and Skirk has never flinched away from him even once. Tartaglia can be as violent and bloodthirsty as he wants; Skirk is worse. She gives zero shits. She loves to fight and hunt and kill and make things bleed. Tartaglia is free to explore and revel in all of his worst inclinations and instincts and that is what the Abyss and Skirk become to him. Freedom.

And then he falls out of the Abyss just as suddenly as he had fallen into it. He didn't even get to say goodbye.

And it's not all bad or anything. Tartaglia isn't miserable. He's plenty capable of making his own happiness. He brings his own joy everywhere he goes (derogatory, unfortunate for everyone else ndkdjdjkd) and he genuinely likes being around other people. He would have missed a lot of things if he'd been permanently trapped.

But now there is an itch that he can't scratch. And it's driving him nuts. And he misses Skirk. She was fun to be around. He liked her.

He finds himself seeing things in everyday life and wishing he could show her. He pulls out ingredients in the kitchen for dinner and wants her to eat his special dish and show off how good he can cook. He reads through reports about the Abyss and he never finds what he's looking for (a swordswoman, an entrance, anything-), but he wants to ask her her opinions about them. He sees a really nice sword and wonders if she would like it. Little things.

Tartaglia decides he's going to find her. Even if it's just for a chance to thank her. Even if it takes years, decades. He just wants to see her again.

And then, it finally happens! They really do get to reunite! I have no idea what will happen in the archon quest of course, but like. I really like the idea that after things settle down, Skirk decides to stay for a while. She doesn't really want to live here or anything, but she's curious. She wants to see what Teyvat is like. She especially wants to see Snezhnaya, like Tartaglia used to talk about. And Tartaglia decides to go with her, he's an experienced traveler, a man of the world after all! He'll take her wherever she'd like to go.

And I'd love for them to say goodbye to The Traveler and Paimon and depart from Fontaine on a classic will-they-won't-they sort of vibe, where it's obvious that Tartaglia has Some Feelings about Skirk, but it's not clear how Skirk really feels about him yet. But it's the kind of thing where it's hopeful, and you want to root for the guy to get his love interest haha.

(The Traveler and Paimon bump into them a few months later and Paimon chides Tartaglia because Childe have you seriously not confessed yet the hell have you been doing all this time, which he responds to with hey, Skirk is a classy lady, give me time to do it right! and meanwhile The Traveler can see around Tartaglia to where Skirk is sitting at their campfire, manspreading on a fallen log, eating raw meat with blood on her face and dripping down her arms BNSKXJSMKDMD)

[thecrabtain]

Misses furinas banner rerun

My sincerest and honest reaction:

[fandombrainrotting]

panttore dynamic is World's Most Perfect Man x sewage rat

[cluescorner]

Sumeru can’t end. If it ends, when the fuck will I get to passionately profess my love to Jeht? If I can’t do that, then what the fuck is even the point?

[daybreakrising]

i have just reminded myself that i need to write up the hcs i have regarding razor's connections to c.yno and v.arka-

[starcurtain]

Ship haters on Hoyolab:

Hoyo themselves:

now why is the official tiktok posting this.

[kingvoiddd]

HIIIIIIII I grinded like 18 hours of Genshin to try and catch up to Fontaine and I'm almost there I just had to burn through like a few months worth of content haha (I'm almost out of sumeru trust)

So! Since I have Genshin on the brain, here's some Aether headcanons!!! + some doodles of him bc I love him and also Xiao x Aether canon I am Hoyo I said it myself.

[cyborgkanojo]

Hoyo won't give us canonical HSR birthdays so I'm personally designating Boothill's as 12/12 (I promise there is some sense to this and that it isn't just random.....kinda (I'm coping))

- He was found by his parents in the snow. (Yes I'm aware that this could also just be a snowy region of his home planet as well)

- High noon.....I guess? Or the clock striking 12 in his trailer

- The astrological sign for that day is sort of a nod to Lan and his following the oath of the Hunt (Sagittarius, centaur)

Uuuuuhh nevermind that that would put his birthday very close to mine okay shhhhhh

[blood-orange-juice]

This this this

It's delightfully messed up

Childe won't mind it precisely because he's here for all the messed up things the world has to offer

I'm here for it too (even if I still can't understand why Zhongli would be interested)

What I don't get is how we are mostly getting the fluff version of the ship, not the delicious mindfuck that it could be.

(at the same time Zhongli is one of the few people in Teyvat who can feel/express compassion for this maniac and actually survive it, so I kind of see the appeal)

Also having a situationship with an ancient god is as cool as it gets.

Hot take: zhongchi is an *insanely* problematic ship.

One of the guys is 5000 years old and the other is, what, 22 max? I don't understand how you people are not finding it weird.

[feroluce]

While he doesn't quite confirm it in canon (he could technically still just be kidding about BOTH parts and his right eye is fine), I love the thought that Boothill actually did lose his right eye based on his "Knowledge" voiceline.

Because after this line, I actually did go back to rewatch his trailer, and yeah. Even when Boothill is literally flipped upside-down, his bangs stay in place. We never see the right side of his face to confirm it one way or the other.

EDIT: So it turns out you CAN see juuuust enough of his right eye under his hair in-game to confirm it's there and looks the same as his left. I am going to promptly file this under canon things I choose to ignore because hc is more fun, but wanted to add this in because I don't like spreading misinformation. Thank @ultigoblin for the info everyone!

And obviously being a Galaxy Ranger comes with a lot of opportunities to lose body parts. Especially given the people he's after, I would not be surprised at all to find out Boothill lost it in some bounty hunting gone wrong haha

But my personal favorite thought is that he lost it during the rebellion on Aeragan-Epharshel.

Boothill brushes aside what happened to his home, he'll openly say it's gone now but after that he just kinda moves on. He doesn't say what happened to it, and I'm sure he would gloss over the loss of his body and his eye the same way. And combined with how he always talks about himself as a Galaxy Ranger, always about the here and now, I feel like it's kinda easy to forget sometimes that oh, right.

This guy fought in warfare.

His character stories don't go into detail either, but it IS described as guerilla warfare. And it makes it clear there was a large technology gap between the IPC and Aeragan-Epharshel. It's possible they didn't have the means for things like cybernetic prosthetics- or if they did, it would have become harder to implement them during a rebellion, with the IPC breathing down their necks.

And I feel like in order to have a cybernetic prosthetic put in, the wound probably has to be healed a certain way. Like it takes medical intervention. There's a whole plan and procedure for it. And especially if Aeragan-Epharshel didn't have that technology in the first place, Boothill wouldn't have had the chance to heal it that way. Like it healed fine, just not in a way that allowed a cybernetic replacement.

So when one of the IPC shot out his right eye (with a "warning shot" of all things), it was pretty much already a given that he was going to be blind on that side from then on.

When he forced the procedure to change his body, there was nothing they could do for that empty right socket. To this day, it's still sealed over with a patch...probably with something rude drawn on it smzjmsmsks

And even though Hoyo is always giving really cool unrealistic designs for eyes, I do like to think his left eye is a cybernetic- that's what the crosshair is there for. It's to make sure Boothill's aim stays consistent and as good as it is when he's in top shape, even through pain or hindered vision. Like it's an aide, yes, but the skill is all his from years of hard work.

But even with all the replacements, all of the upgrades.

Behind that crosshair, he made sure to keep the natural color of his own eyes.

[closed--meadow]

Fanon Ship children are good, very interesting to write and characterize. But what about ship pets?? What about two charecters becoming so emotionally attached to a creature that their life literally molds around it??

Cus I can't stop thinking about Ratio having a pet cat that he'd name something so goofy and serious that it's funny. Something like Theorem of Ptolemy (Theo for short) and the cat would be the most reserved girlie ever. Doesn't give a fuck about anyone, not even Ratio most if the time, and Ratio would treat her like she is a grown human, would talk to her like she is just another work colleague and she'd not even meow back at him. It's fine though, she keeps him company and after his parents the cat is the only thing he is most attached to.

Until the Annoying Gambler comes into his life Ofcourse, suddenly he has another person to care for. And just when he thinks his life is the most affected by Aventurine, the gambler comes over for whatever business stuff they are to discuss one day, and Theo suddenly has multiple Fucks to give. She'd not go near him at first, but that hasn't really stopped Aventurine, ever, so he'd try to warm up to her. And it would so backfire. Like she's now falling asleep on his lap and trapping him in one place for hours level backfire. She MUST stick to him the whole time he is over at Ratio's. Would hijack his coat but loafing up on top of it and forcing him to leave it behind.

Ratio would stand there and feel betrayed af. And he wouldn't even know who is he most jealous of, Aventurine cus that cat has never given /him/ the same amount of attention, or Theo cus he himself has never been able to shower that Gambler with that much attention. He'd grumble and would try to ignore the obvious warmth in his chest cus- two of his most favourite beings love each other???? Also soft aventurine, the real kind. Cus who wouldn't absolutely melt at a Cat.

Now, I had all of this in my mind before 2.2 so I'm only a bit salty that hoyo alr made it canon that aventurine acquires the catcakes and we all sort fo agreed that it was Ratio who gifted him those. And now my headcanons is somehow sort of canon :| but yeah, I still wanted to get this brainrot out of my head so 😋

[sashiavi]

this is my second time in your inbox today but i have to make it up for the time i neglected you pookie hehe

I just had a sudden thought about wrio- like😳😳😳😳 and I'm here to share it

imagine wrio tugging at his tie to allow some air on his neck with one hand as he looks at you after you provoked him, a smirk growing on his lips. I'm talking about tendons flexing so good like ajdhsjdhja I want those hands on and in me and I don't really care where 😋😋

I live for the headcanon of big beefy wrio so I'd like to suck on those mantitties for the rest of my life please and thank you. and just imagine the thickness of his shoulders and arms and legs AND OH GOD THE THIGHS IM BASICALLY DROOLING I want him to suffocate me with them while I give him that gawk gawk 3000🥰

and don't get me started on wrio with a stubble because I could go on for hours. I know that feels amazing as he gives head ajdhshdgjahdk like no babe you aren't going anywhere I only came 3 times- (he would be the one to refuse to move before 5 orgasms its canon i asked it to hoyo and joe zieja and they both confirmed)

I'm down bad. I don't even want kids but if this man came to me and says that he wants 6 I'd throw myself on the bed clothes gone legs spread pussy ready for that massive cock and I'm not even sorry

okay i feel like this is enough- bye bye pookie😚

Ughhhh pookie bearrrrr you're speaking my language </33

I am a firm believer of thickkk Wrio - I too wanna suck on his tiddies so bad oh my godd

Riding on his thick thigh? With his hands all over you- and the hANDS you're so correct his hands would be so hot

Ughhh big beefy Wrio with a little bit of a soft belly and a thick happy trail leading down disappearing into his pants 😩💕 that "clearly goes to the gym and works hArd and is sooooo strong but he eats well and looks after himself" </333 soooo good to cuddle :((

Just imagining his stamina too- and he's so givingggg ugh I can't even

The fear of pregnancy is g o n e with this man I'd let him do whatever he wanted you can put that on record babe

[isnt-it-pretty]

Consider Kaeya lying and telling Diluc he isn't blind specifically for this reason. Him telling Jean that he doesn't want Diluc to know and getting her to lie to him.

Kaeya actually being blind and deciding it's better for Diluc to think he's an asshole than to drown in guilt over it.

i know Diluc found out Kaeya wasn’t actually blinded in his right eye but imagine the guilt and grief he felt before finding out Kaeya wasn’t blinded. imagine Diluc sitting there with his head in his hands just absolutely heartbroken over the fact that he has /blinded/ Kaeya in one eye

Imagine how much he would’ve cried out of guilt reading Kaeya’s letters, thinking about what he has done and not being able to bring himself to respond to them because Kaeya should hate him, shouldn’t he?

ragbros have been on my mind for DAYS and hidden strife lore DIDNT HELP