#this is based pretty much entirely off of my memory btw Sorry i was not taking notes

[neolxzr]

OK so heres some of my favorite things that were talked about during the enter the florpus commentary thing yesterday:

one of jhonen's favorite things in the whole movie is the writing in zim's kitchen that says "do anything is real?"

they clarified specifically that gir was not lying and he did in fact eat a baby at the crazy taco

gir smells REALLY bad. theres like rotting organic matter in his body at all times. he stinks

zim's human suit is made out of actual human skin

zim is acting drunk on nacho cheese during that scene in his house because richard horvitz recorded it while drunk

they planned to have this whole thing with tak's ship only agreeing to go to moo-ping 10 because it knows tak is there. they wouldve shown her in silhouette during that brief explosion and she wouldve stowed away on the ship without anyone knowing and then wouldve shown up towards the end of the movie, but they decided to cut it out

zim did not need to frame membrane for a crime in order to get him into space prison and likely just tossed the guards like 5 bucks for it. its a shady place. they did specify though that if he did frame him for something, it would have been jaywalking

they pointed out during that scene where zim is celebrating peace day on dib's lawn that zim's reaction to seeing dib was very much genuine and that's just how his brain works. he is genuinely surprised to see him pop out of his own house. (they also described his reaction as like "being surprised to see your best friend")

the ham joke was ABSOLUTELY CRITICAL to the film and at some point jhonen remembered it and was like GUYS. WE ALMOST FORGOT THE HAM

there was supposed to be this joke where it cuts to and from gaz and dib in tak's ship and they would've had to stop at like a warp station or something and theyd be waiting in a long queue of spaceships and the radio is broken in the ship so theyre stuck listening to that one song. then itd cut to them like totally braindead drooling from listening to it for so long. and then a little later itd cut back a FINAL time and theyd know all of the words and both be singing along to it. but this was also cut out so only the last bit remained

when asked "who would win: minimoose or mrs. bitters?" the answer was along the lines of "neither, i think all of us lose in that scenario"

the tallest are just two dudes who happen to be the same height and therefore have to share the same job. they are not brothers and they are also not gay lovers ("as much as you want them to be, they are not. there is no love in this universe")

skooge is in fact alive and lives in zim's basement. they wanted to keep the number of "hey remember this thing from the tv show!" moments to a minimum so he was not mentioned in the movie. but he is there

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

sorry to post about OUAT outside of the safety of the patreon corral but I just. truly cannot stop thinking about the bugfuck insanity of the writers deciding to drop in the seventh episode of their show ever that Regina has kept the same man as a sex slave in two separate realities.

like the nature of Storybrooke is that, having altered memories and lives constructed by Regina, I think almost everyone is off the hook for any sex under the effects of the OG curse—ie, Snow White might regret hooking up with Victor Frankenstein but the two of them were as on an equal footing as possible in the situation and both consented based on their understanding of reality at the time—with the obvious exception of Regina! who is extremely aware that everyone else in town is the most under the influence that maybe anyone has ever been in the history of the world!

which would be yucky enough if it was like, a bad situationship that developed organically in Storybrooke, but no man she was just recreating her setup in the Enchanted Forest where she kept Graham as a sex slave for god knows how many years. hello! hello!!! is anyone listening I'm going insane.

season one kind of revels in getting to roll out little reveals of Regina's litany of crimes via flashbacks to keep emphasizing, over and over, that she is insane and petty and willing to stoop to pretty much anything. in the first episode you know she's responsible for the curse that drives the entire plot, standard big bad stuff, but by the tenth episode you know she also kidnapped multiple children and sent them to their deaths in the candy house from Hansel and Gretel. which is obviously bad, no shit, but it's like. she's Snow White's wicked stepmother, she's the villain in a loosely goosey live action adaptation of classic Disney movies. endangering children for cruel and petty reasons is part of the territory.

but she also like. you know. she explicitly has a scared, trapped man dragged away to her bed chamber after she forcibly kisses him and magically rips his heart out of his chest specifically so that he can never defy her again. and then in case there was even a little bit of doubt left about what's going on there she continues to make his real world counterpart have sex with her, and even under a spell that's completely erased his memories of his old identity and life, he admits that his relationship with Regina doesn't make him feel anything. no one ever comes right out and says Regina is using her power as the mayor to pressure him into it, but that would frankly be mild by her standards.

I can't even quite articulate why I'm so hung up on this except that it's like, so jarring to have Regina do so many over the top cartoon crimes with her magical murder and mayhem and then also slip in oh, btw, she's also a rapist! she raped that man!" especially when you factor in that, based on my memory of the show and general understanding of what mind of show this is, no one is ever going to acknowledge that. when Regina starts her good guy redemption arc and other characters try to hold her accountable for things it's always going to be "you killed Graham" and never "you killed Graham after raping him repeatedly for many years in two different realities." no one is ever going to talk about that.

except for me, because I'm stuck watching six and a half more seasons and I will not be able to forget.

[quincyhorst]

Hello!!

Sorry to bother you but…i’m wondering do you have any headcannons for occult or shin teikoku?? I feel like both teams is a whole mystery on itself but….i’m just asking on the possibility!!

Hope you have a great day!!

Hello! Thank you very much for your ask! 🥰 It's been so long since I've written about non-FFI teams, but I always enjoy going through memory lane ~

First off... I unfortunately don't have much stuff for Shin Teikoku, though I do have a little theory based off canon + reading comments in the Ina11 subreddit: I think that part of the team members were actually scouted by Fudou (And by that, pretty much I mean being manipulated till they fall for the charm for the Aliea stone), but there's also the other worrying possibility that many of the other team members were kidnapped and forcefully made to wear the stone; at least according to the game and its mention of kidnappings in Ehime. Or hell, it could be both: With Fudou seeing potential in a player and sending people to kidnap them. Either way, the info might be a bit contradictory between sources.

But in that case, who joined out of their free will, and who were forced to join? I can't really tell yet.

---

As for Occult I do have some stuff, though it's a bit loose. For example, sometimes I enjoy thinking of where these kids could be in GO (For example, I see Nata working as a butcher). And I also have oddly specific crackskips (Tsukimura x Jisakuha/Onotomo...), if that counts (?)

I do remember however that some years ago I was really interesed on Reigen Michihisa/Jiang-Shi; to the point I wrote an entire backstory about him. I've tried to find the original draft everywhere, but... I can only rely on my memories for now. And some leftover drawings I did, too:

From what I remember, I had written that Michihisa's mother was chinese, but she moved to Japan alongside Mr. Reigen. Things go well, they form a family, until an incident takes away both the man and only child. In a desesperate effort to recover what she had lost, the woman decides to use her knowledge of supernatural arts; the reminders from a life she left behind. The results came so and so; both jiang-shi tend to struggle with movement but they are still able to live a comfortable live in their new state. And that's all for now 🤷

i have a feeling this backstory + my interest on Reigen back then was inspired by the song RTRT by Mili. Plus my prior fascination on jiang-shis overall thanks to Touhou and stuff 😭 (I recommend listening to it btw, it also inspired many beautiful MVs you can find on Youtube)

...Returning to Reigen, I nowadays I just believe he's only pretending to be a jiang-shi, no supernatural stuff involved (?) But I'll still leave his backstory there for reference.

Either way, hope you like it! And apologies for the long reply, I finally finished some last minute stuff ;v;

[ophidianoccultist]

Uprising

Tom Riddle x F!Reader

================

MINORS DNI 🔞

hi this is my first time writing for tumblr, and im starting off with a whopper. i dont know what all the trigger warnings are supposed to be but i tried my best to be accomodating. also my ass did NOT research but hopefully my memory should suffice and i did my best to keep characters and stuff accurate or at least adjacent. im on mobile btw so im sorry if any formatting is weird but yeah, this one is uh...pretty dark so yeah, hope you enjoy :)

TW: smut, oral (m receiving), master/slave dynamic, bloodlust, bodily harm, very very kinky Tom

PROMPT: This takes place in the infancy of his rise to becoming the Dark Lord. Y/N has been the only one to manage to get somewhat close to Tom, being his first real devoted follower, but does he really love her or is she simply a tool for power and pleasure?

Word count: 1.8k

The stone floor was cold and dry, just like the rest of the manor that had been the base of operations for Tom Riddle, or as his followers know him, Lord Voldemort. The only warmth in the room came from the hearth, which bathed the room in an eerie, orange glow. The light of a fireplace would usually be calming and comforting; yet when juxtaposed with the topic being discussed with the Dark Lord and a table full of his followers, it was as if it filled the room with an ironic coldness.

The table that stood starkly in the middle of the room sat only around ten people. Some belonged to the Black and Malfoy families, as they had the power, wealth, and influence to help spread the message of their uprising. The rest, however, were friends that Tom had made during his time at Hogwarts. He had promised them glory and power should they choose to side with him. And he had the power of the Blacks and Malfoys at his side, so why would they ever question him?

"Remember what we have discussed today, and we shall put our plan into action. This will take much care and caution to execute, lest we wish to be exposed and our movement snuffed out. You may go, and I will call upon you again when need be."

The voice of the Dark Lord reverberated throughout the room, cold and authoritative. With every word that came from his lips, it felt to his followers that he was speaking snakes into existence, coiling around their throats and threatening to squeeze if they so much as spoke a word out of turn. Tom Riddle was a handsome man, with curly, jet black hair that he made sure was always neatly maintained. His brown eyes always seemed to see right through people as if they were ghosts (and depending on who he's looking at, they soon would be). The way he carried himself and strode about the halls with his head high simply screamed that he was entirely fit to be a Dark Lord. The very perception of him was perfect, like someone you would see in a painted portrait hanging in the hall of a lavish castle.

But of course, those thoughts stayed in Y/N's mind as the occupants of the table stood and made their way to the hearth to take the floo network back to wherever they needed to be. The floo flame now bathed the room in a green hue as the Death Eaters made their exit, while the Dark Lord remained seated at the head of the table with his most faithful servant at his side.

On her knees, at his side, as he preferred. Y/N was his queen, yes, but he also still saw her as his inferior. This was commonplace at these meetings; Y/N on her knees at his side as the Dark Lord gave his orders, her head and arms draped across his lap, and a collar around her throat. The leash, of which, he kept a firm hold of. It was all a display of power and of status, complete ownership of another living soul. She had been the first one to bear the Dark Mark on her forearm, and with that, comes special treatment. Y/N was permitted the place as his right hand, able to give orders so long that they do not undermine his own. She was also given the privilege of warming his bed and knowing just enough of his plans and secrets to make her feel special and more complicit in his plots. Little pieces, crumbs of information to make her feel like she was his most trusted confidant.

As the last of the Death Eaters disappeared into the emerald flames, the Dark Lord pulled Y/N to her feet by the leash he always kept a tight hold on. Now that they were alone, he was free to slip on his other mask: the mask of the lover. Now, he was simply Tom.

"Come now, my dear, let us retreat to my chambers for the night. You look exhausted, and I don't say I blame you. Listening to that lot blabbering on about their imbecilic ideas exhausts me as well, at times."

"Of course, my Lord."

Y/N knew exactly what he was implying, as it had become a nightly occurrence. Tom would want to be pleasured by her and, to his credit, he would pay the favor back in kind. He opened the door to his chambers, which were always kept spotless and neat. The emerald blankets that adorned his bed were crisply tucked in and smooth, and there was scarcely a drop of wax on the nightstands on either side from the lit candlesticks. But Tom took a seat on the side of the bed regardless, though Y/N swore she saw his eye twitch as he saw the sheets crease underneath the weight of him. He gave a sharp tug of the leash, pulling her closer to him, and almost making her stumble.

"Kneel."

He did not have to tell her twice. She had learned the heard way that it was unwise to make him tell her twice. Y/N dropped to her knees in front of him, patiently awaiting orders. This was what life was like for her now, and she was perfectly happy with it. When it came down to it, she was still Tom's queen, and truly the one that he respected most. The thought gave her warmth as he thoroughly debased and degraded her every night after the business of the day had been dealt with. All of his frustrations, his tension, his stress, it all went into her. His queen, his pet, his slave.

"You know what to do."

Tom said flatly, in the sardonic and authoritative tone that always coated his words. And as Tom ordered, Y/N did. Her hands moved to unbutton and unzip his trousers, pulling the fabric of that and his undergarments down only enough to free his member, which stood proudly at attention just as the rest of him did every day. That was the only degree to which Y/N was allowed to undress him; Tom had always preferred to do any undressing himself, if he even did at all. But something about witnessing how eagerly and desperately his queen wished to free his cock from its cloth prison aroused him, so he had kindly allowed her that privilege.

Y/N's tongue ran up the underside of his length and swirled around his tip before her lips wrapped around it and moved back and forth. Tom was an impatient man, and did not like to be teased or kept waiting. Soon enough, his hand was tangled in her hair, almost as if he was petting her, before grabbing a tight fistful of it and forcing himself further down her throat. This meeting had been particularly grating, and he needed a release now. He moved the head of his lover back and forth on his cock, reveling in the feeling of her hot, slimy throat clenching around him. Y/N would never get a single moan out of Tom; only heavy and labored breaths, if she was lucky.

Soon, he felt he was on the edge of his release, and his hips bucked a little to fuck the throat of his queen. His queen, no one else's. Y/N was his property, his object, and no one would be able to take her from him. Tom let out a long sigh as he spilled his seed down Y/N's throat, which he had sheathed himself fully into, and with her dutifully swallowing every drop. After it was finished, Tom released his hold on her hair and allowed her to pull back and breathe for a moment.

"Tonight is going to be a little different, my pet. Strip completely and lay down on the bed."

"Yes, my lord. How will tonight be different, though?"

"Do not question me, you shall see soon enough."

Tom commanded coldly, though his voice was laced with a sadistic hunger. Y/N conceded to her Lord and master with a nod, making quick work of her clothes as she let them stay in a pile on the floor. Tom pulled her by her leash to the bed, where she laid comfortably on her back, hands at her sides.

"Now, we are going to try something a little different. It will only bring you pain, no pleasure, so be forewarned. The only pleasure now will be had by me. I must please ask you not to squirm or scream, or else it will end badly for you. Understood, my pet?"

Y/N nodded as he tucked himself back into his trousers and made himself proper again. Tom was now completely dressed, and had stated that Y/N would be receiving no pleasure, so what did he plan to do? Every question running through her head was soon answered as he pulled a dagger from the drawer of his bedside cabinet, studying it carefully. His eyes, which still were even sharper than the dagger he held in his bony hand, darted to the chest of his lover, eyeing the flesh hungrily.

Leaning down, his eyes never leaving the spot above her right breast he had fixated on, he slowly dragged the blade across the soft skin, down her chest, leaving a trail of red in its wake. Y/N hissed in pain, but did not dare move out of position. The blade stopped in the middle of her chest, below her breasts, before mirroring the mark he made on her right side to her left. On complete impulse, Tom laid the bloodied dagger on the nightstand and ran his tongue across the mark he just made. He did not cut deep enough to cause major injury, though it would definitely leave a scar, from the way it was weeping blood. The Dark Lord relished the metallic taste of her essence, letting it rest on his tongue, and letting it drip down his throat. The taboo and unnatural act he was performing was almost euphoric, and it made him feel powerful, as if he was a dementor sucking the very soul out of her body. When Tom was satisfied and Y/N's bleeding had ceased, he sat back up and gazed hungrily down at the chest of his queen, at the work he had done.

Now, Y/N was perfect to him.

Cut across her chest, was the letter V. V for the new name he had chosen for himself. A V to mark his property, a scarlet letter emblazoned upon her body so that she may never forget who she serves. And if ever she does forget, Tom would make absolute certain to remind her.

[sunflowerandstrawberryspice332]

Season FUCKING 8 of Ninjago

So I have been emotionally demolished (big surprise there) because my favorite character, and please don’t behead me for this, was Garmadon. I’ve never really mentioned it before because I saw no need to, but gods.... I’m in physical pain.

Why is Garmadon my favorite character? (I swear this section matters)

Because I love the way the show handled his character, I love how even when he was evil even when he was infected with the Great Devourer's venom, he was clearly trying to be good, he played more of the role of an anti hero than a true utter villain in my personal opinion (the crew also said that was kinda the intention in the beginning so I’m not to far off base). He clearly cared about his son and his wife, with Lloyd seemingly knowing who his father was before he had even gotten the chance to meet his mother (I promise I will talk about Misako in this rant cause she does play into it) and Garmadon is shown doing pretty much nothing other than telling his son “I love you, you matter and please don’t be like me” in season one through till then end of season four and even in their short meeting in season five. 

Also it feels like the characters conveniently forget the fact that: isn’t the whole reason he’s evil because he was bit by the Great Devourer? The best comparison I can think of is blaming someone who was bit by a werewolf for becoming a werewolf, again not sure how else to put it. Also he’s shown doing a whole shit ton of good stuff before the evil like fully took over, like he fought multiple wars on the good side. 

But then after he’s like de-evil-fied he immediately becomes this really kind chill person (hm it’s almost like he was a fundamentally good person who got dealt a really bad hand) even swearing off fighting, only breaking that vow because his son is in danger. In fact after he’s turned not evil (idk man) he’s a really valuable member of the team who’s honestly a lot less reckless when it come to the ninja’s well beings, like seriously who left Wu in charge of these people, and even snapped at Wu when they got BLASTED OFF INTO SPACE. His redemption is rather slow with most of the ninja taking most of season two to truly warm up to him, even after they’re still clearly weary of him, which I freaking love btw.

Finally after multiple seasons of proving he is a better person, admitting past lies (such as the letter to Misako, which honestly if a letter was all it took to sway her one way or another I’m not really sure how loyal she truly is, but I digress), mending bonds and just generally doing things to prove himself a good person, then the ending of season four hits and he sacrifices himself in a final act selflessness to save everyone. And I’m sorry but the line “I had wanted to make the world in my image, but I realize I already have, in you.” To Lloyd as his last goodbye was just heart wrenching. His last goodbye was an act of selfless good and even after we see him in season five he’s not concerned about escaping he is concerned about his sons wellbeing. 

Why Harumi bringing him back makes me so upset.

So yeah that’s why I love Garmadon but why does it matter? Well because he died a good person. He died with people remembering his sacrifice as something good. Then Harumi brought him back, but not the Garmadon who loved his son more than anything, not the Garmadon who went through seasons of mending bonds, no she brought back the part of him entirely consumed with evil and hate, and it makes me so FUICKING mad!

Imagen you go through years of healing and change so you’ll be remembered not only for the evil you did but the good person you died as, only for someone to bring back the evil part of you to crush the image people had of you and wrecking the bonds you’d made leaving your memory utterly demolished and your family bond broken because some random girl decided she cared more about her own revenge and anger than the peace and good ending you had worked so hard to achieve.

Also the effect it’s going to have on Lloyd (Note I have not yet watched season 9 so take this as what I think would be the emotions he’d be feeling). His last true memories with his father were with the Garmadon who redeemed himself, it’s the person Lloyd considers to be his real father/the real Garmadon only for Harumi to bring back the man who Lloyd knows isn’t really his father only a hollow shell with his voice and snippets of memories. I can’t even imagine one how gut wrenchingly terrible it would feel to lose your parent only for someone to bring back what’s essentially an evil clone to destroy all the good that they had previously done.

Enough about Garmadon lets talk about season 8 (This section is far lighter)

This season was awesome! I loved most of the changes to the character designs and voices (apparently some people didn’t like the changes but honestly my only complaint has so be Kai’s hair color being kinda weird) it just felt like everyone’s voice actors were going so much harder this season, especially Zane, Cole and Nya’s like Nya’s voice and (let’s be honest) pretty bad hair cut was holding her back and since that all changed she’s honestly just so much cooler now! Also Zane switching from more human esq while in front of people while being robotic around his friends was just a fun rather personal touch, like it just felt like such a neat character quirk, like I just love to think of Zane not wanting to scare like younger children and stuff like that so he wears the more human appearance.  

I loved all the reveals of small character quirks, especially with Cole, like him apparently not liking public singing (do I smell possibilities for fanfiction) and being really good with kids, like that’s just so adorable. Also all of Cole and Zane’s little side quest was just more shipping fuel for me lol. I loved the Pixel reveal and it just feels so fitting for her to be samurai X like just way to fun!

Was the season perfect: no, but was it really freaking fun and enjoyable and depressing, yes yes it was! In conclusion this Lego show should not have this much of a hold over my emotions tbh, but I’m not gonna stop watch so ya know!

[sunflowerandstrawberryspice]

Season FUCKING 8 of Ninjago

(this was written a while ago I am now done with season 12)

So I have been emotionally demolished (big surprise there) because my favorite character, and please don’t behead me for this, was Garmadon. I’ve never really mentioned it before because I saw no need to, but gods.... I’m in physical pain.

Why is Garmadon my favorite character? (I swear this section matters)

Because I love the way the show handled his character, I love how even when he was evil even when he was infected with the Great Devourer's venom, he was clearly trying to be good, he played more of the role of an anti hero than a true utter villain in my personal opinion (the crew also said that was kinda the intention in the beginning so I’m not to far off base). He clearly cared about his son and his wife, with Lloyd seemingly knowing who his father was before he had even gotten the chance to meet his mother (I promise I will talk about Misako in this rant cause she does play into it) and Garmadon is shown doing pretty much nothing other than telling his son “I love you, you matter and please don’t be like me” in season one through till then end of season four and even in their short meeting in season five. 

Also it feels like the characters conveniently forget the fact that: isn’t the whole reason he’s evil because he was bit by the Great Devourer? The best comparison I can think of is blaming someone who was bit by a werewolf for becoming a werewolf, again not sure how else to put it. Also he’s shown doing a whole shit ton of good stuff before the evil like fully took over, like he fought multiple wars on the good side. 

But then after he’s like de-evil-fied he immediately becomes this really kind chill person (hm it’s almost like he was a fundamentally good person who got dealt a really bad hand) even swearing off fighting, only breaking that vow because his son is in danger. In fact after he’s turned not evil (idk man) he’s a really valuable member of the team who’s honestly a lot less reckless when it come to the ninja’s well beings, like seriously who left Wu in charge of these people, and even snapped at Wu when they got BLASTED OFF INTO SPACE. His redemption is rather slow with most of the ninja taking most of season three to truly warm up to him, even after they’re still clearly weary of him, which I freaking love btw.

Finally after multiple seasons of proving he is a better person, admitting past lies (such as the letter to Misako, which honestly if a letter was all it took to sway her one way or another I’m not really sure how loyal she truly is, but I digress), mending bonds and just generally doing things to prove himself a good person, then the ending of season four hits and he sacrifices himself in a final act selflessness to save everyone. And I’m sorry but the line “I had wanted to make the world in my image, but I realize I already have, in you.” To Lloyd as his last goodbye was just heart wrenching. His last goodbye was an act of selfless good and even after we see him in season five he’s not concerned about escaping he is concerned about his sons wellbeing. 

Why Harumi bringing him back makes me so upset.

So yeah that’s why I love Garmadon but why does it matter? Well because he died a good person. He died with people remembering his sacrifice as something good. Then Harumi brought him back, but not the Garmadon who loved his son more than anything, not the Garmadon who went through seasons of mending bonds, no she brought back the part of him entirely consumed with evil and hate, and it makes me so FUICKING mad!

Imagine you go through years of healing and change so you’ll be remembered not only for the evil you did but the good person you died as, only for someone to bring back the evil part of you to crush the image people had of you and wrecking the bonds you’d made leaving your memory utterly demolished and your family bond broken because some random girl decided she cared more about her own revenge and anger than the peace and good ending you had worked so hard to achieve.

Also the effect it’s going to have on Lloyd (Note I have not yet watched season 9 so take this as what I think would be the emotions he’d be feeling). His last true memories with his father were with the Garmadon who redeemed himself, it’s the person Lloyd considers to be his real father/the real Garmadon only for Harumi to bring back the man who Lloyd knows isn’t really his father only a hollow shell with his voice and snippets of memories. I can’t even imagine one how gut wrenchingly terrible it would feel to lose your parent only for someone to bring back what’s essentially an evil clone to destroy all the good that they had previously done.

Enough about Garmadon lets talk about season 8 (This section is far lighter)

This season was awesome! I loved most of the changes to the character designs and voices (apparently some people didn’t like the changes but honestly my only complaint has so be Kai’s hair color being kinda weird) it just felt like everyone’s voice actors were going so much harder this season, especially Zane, Cole and Nya’s like Nya’s voice and (let’s be honest) pretty bad hair cut was holding her back and since that all changed she’s honestly just so much cooler now! Also Zane switching from more human esq while in front of people while being robotic around his friends was just a fun rather personal touch, like it just felt like such a neat character quirk, like I just love to think of Zane not wanting to scare like younger children and stuff like that so he wears the more human appearance.  

I loved all the reveals of small character quirks, especially with Cole, like him apparently not liking public singing (do I smell possibilities for fanfiction) and being really good with kids, like that’s just so adorable. Also all of Cole and Zane’s little side quest was just more shipping fuel for me lol. I loved the Pixel reveal and it just feels so fitting for her to be samurai X like just way to fun!

Was the season perfect: no, but was it really freaking fun and enjoyable and depressing, yes yes it was! In conclusion this Lego show should not have this much of a hold over my emotions tbh, but I’m not gonna stop watch so ya know!

[dimorphodon-x]

I hope I'm not too late to join the OC reaction game. >///< But since I used my main OC, Swiftwire, the last time, I felt it was time to introduce her son. I've been meaning to flesh him out more, so this will really help me out! Also, you kinda inspired his creation, so I hope you'll consider this my thanks for you unintentionally helping me out. ^w^ So, for either Solclave (my comfort character, btw ¬3¬') or Starhawk, or both if you feel like it... How would they feel meeting Swiftwire's and Knockout's adopted son, Conduit?

He's a very short, very young, and very energetic yellow and black Cybertronian Seeker who's highly optimistic, playful, overly eager to help, loves to learn about medicine in order to become a doctor when he's older, and generally a very polite and kind early-teenaged mech... and he will call Hawk or Solclave "Uncle" or "Mister" and he will try to befriend them and ramble on about his newest discovery (and possibly ask innocent but awkward questions about stuff he doesn't understand), or immediately help them if he stumbles upon them at their first meeting... despite the countless "stranger danger" lessons he's received from his overprotective parents.

Conduit does have a rather sad past, though, which involves his early childhood memories consisting entirely of his days as an experiment to a cruel scientist, the result of which being his namesake... the four rods on a panel embedded in his back between his wings, crafted into his body to allow him to control sky-based elements (mainly lightning, heat and ice), but using them will sometimes drain him to the brink of exhaustion or cause severe pain in his arms and back if he overuses his ability. When he escaped, he lived for so long out in the barren wastelands of Cybertron that he became a feral child, fighting only with his fangs and self-inflicting ability for fuel and territory for the remainder of his life, until Swift found him and helped him regain his true self in safety and shelter, bringing with it his desire to help others.

In short, Conduit is a precious boi and he will talk your ear off, but despite his dark past and ALL the trauma in his tiny body, he is still friend shaped and loves to help.

I'm really sorry about how long this became, but take your time answering this! I love your work, and I hope you have a good timezone!! ^3^

Solclave-

Sol is patient but (unlike his birdformers counterpart) he is awkward with kids. Apart from them being a pretty rare sight for him, he isn’t entirely sure how to handle them aside from gently, so he’s not much of a playmate. He’s also not sure how to feel about nicknames either, but doesn’t voice it.

He bluntly and simply answers questions and listens to Conduit talk without any problem. Listening is easier for him anyway.

He’d get a little extra protective if he learned his history tho.

“That’s a question you should ask your parents…”

Starhawk-

Starhawk would get along much better than Sol tbh. He has the energy to play games and all that fun stuff. He’d be cool with the ‘uncle’ nickname but less so with ‘mister’. Makes him feel old lol.

While listening to Conduit talk about stuff, he’d try to be more engaged as he listens, and while he can’t answer many questions, he’d try his best.

Conduit’s past would be pretty upsetting for him to learn about. He’s just a kid and already went through some awful stuff. That’s just not right…

“He’s still a kid and already he went through all that?”

[yumgrapejuice]

An analysis on Ranboo’s lore playlist

okay y’all first of all, ranboo has a killer taste, i love him, and second, i couldn’t resist. i’m an analyst by nature. am i looking too deep into some things? did ranboo maybe choose some songs purely for the vibe? perhaps. do i care? no. let me have my fun.

I’m gonna drop my own analysis/interpretation based on these songs but feel free do use this yourself if you want!! And also feel free to disagree/correct me on anything!! I’m not a professional musical analyst lol and I did take some inspiration from already existing interpretations for the more lyrical songs.

here’s the playlist btw

“Introduction to the Snow”—introduction to the album. Fitting for the playlist’s beginning, seeing the tone. It’s mostly referencing (self-imposed) isolation.

“Dream Sweet in Sea Major”—this Miracle Music’s whole album is about dreams and reality, how they clash, loneliness and the wish to be close to someone, yet still remaining isolated. Very whimsical, metaphorical, melodic, and it has this vibe as if on the edge of consciousness. I’d say it fits quite well with c!Ranboo’s general vibe. This song in particular deals with sleepwalking(ha)/being in a dreamlike state, the line between what’s real and what’s not blurred.

“The Mind Electric”—oh this one fits Ranboo extremely well. First part is in reverse, the second in normal (mirroring), and it can get quite unsettling. Like you’re not sure what’s happening with the instrumentals, many different voices. Again, very metaphorical, but to put it shortly, the protagonist is being judged for a crime they’ve committed and, in their defence, they say: “Father, your honor, may I explain, my brain has claimed its glory over me; I’ve a good heart albeit insane”. They get “condemned to the infirmary” for that, where electric shock is used on them as a form of “therapy”. As a result, the protagonist loses grip on reality and themselves and truly does go insane. They beg for mercy and sympathy, but there’s no one to help them. “Someone help me; Understand what's going on inside my mind; Doctor I can't tell if I'm not me”—need I say more, really?

“Live and Let Die”—the phrase “live and let die” means to live your life how you wish and let others live how they wish without interfering. At first, you live by the phrase “live and let live”, meaning you have your ideals and you try to change the lives of others according to them, but as life progresses, you stop caring as much/try to distance yourself from others’ business.

“Turn the Lights Off”—dreams and nightmares. Mildly foreboding yet energetic. The actual meaning is about growing up (transition from childhood to adulthood), but we can take some other interpretations that’d fit with Ranboo’s character better. This Tally Hall’s album deals with differences, black and white, and how there shouldn’t be a divide between them. In this song, there are some noteworthy lines that I’d like to mention:

- “Bend the nightmare, you control it; Artful dodger, easy does it”—lucid dreaming, you have to be careful with it so as to not lose control.

- “Shut the closet, get under the covers”—you’re afraid of something and instead of facing it and seeing whether there even is something to be afraid of, you hide.

- “Turn the lights off”—confront your fears. It can also mean that in the dark, there’s no differences between people, going back to the album’s meaning.

- “And everybody wants to get evil tonight; But all good devils masquerade under the light”—this could mean that everyone has a darker part of themselves but those who actually indulge in their dark tendencies do so in plain sight by pretending to be someone else.

“Ruler of Everything”—the main theme here is time and how it’s the “ruler of everything”; time doesn’t matter about where it goes, and it will never stop. The second verse is most interesting to me—there are two singers, man and time, but for the sake of interpretation let’s just see it as two voices. One is obsessed about being liked, fitting in, constantly asking for reaffirmation (“Do you like how I walk? Do you like how I talk?”), while the second criticizes the first (“You practice your mannerisms into the wall”). They argue—”I’ve been you, I know you, your facade is scam; You know you’re making me cry, this is the way that I am”. The second is calling out the first for not being honest to himself. Tone is lighthearted but with an edge of unease.

“Merry-Go-Round of Life”—from Howl’s Moving Castle soundtrack. The title’s self-explanatory, I’d say.

“Killer Queen”—this one’s a harder one to interpret in regards to Ranboo lol. The song is about, based on an interview with Mercury, a high class woman that likes to indulge in her various desires (mostly sexual). I would doubt that’s what Ranboo was going for, so! Perhaps about a person that has no regards for their reputation and instead does whatever they feel like it? They have a certain image but still act however they like. Yeah, not too sure about this one :’) But that’s what I’ll go with for my later analysis.

“Ain’t No Rest for the Wicked”—quite straightforward. A person that performs bad deeds has reasons for them. Not excuses, but explanations, and you can sympathize with it. We all do “bad” things for one reason or the other, and, in the end, we’re all just trying to get by. Once again, plays into the theme of there not being a clear distinction between good and bad.

“The Bidding”—another harder one to interpret. On the surface, it’s about an auction where men are trying to sell themselves to women. They all present themselves in different images, and it’s remarked that the women care less about the date and more about the prospect of it, the pretty words. The date, actually, ends up being disappointing. Could be about expectations. Some men outright admit they’re assholes so whoever chooses them should know that. People can tell you what their intentions are from the start so if you end up hurt, you have no one else to blame but yourself.

“A Mask of My Own Face”—another interesting one! Unusual instruments, strong beat. They’re singing about how they have a desire to pretend to be someone else while secretly still being themselves. “I’d rob my own apartment and I wouldn’t give a damn; I’d blame it on the person that nobody knows I am”—implying they have no regard for their own livelihood and are just out to have some fun. Plus, that no one would be aware it’s all an act. “I'd wear it on Thanksgiving and I'd laugh in the parade; At all the people hissing, knowing I'm the one they hate”—they take delight in the idea of upsetting others and them not knowing it’s actually the singer that they should be hissing. “And at the big finale I would tear my face away; And smile as they grip their own and try to do the same”—everyone wears masks, and this person implies that their mask and their true self is not different from each other while others’ are.

“Stardust Crusaders”—soundtrack from Jojo. Action-packed? idk never seen it sorry lol

“I Can’t Decide”—oh, this one’s a doozy! One of the ones that do not fit c!Ranboo at all, but that’s what makes it interesting. A classic, the singer is out to have fun, very lighthearted and yet they’re singing about murder. The protagonist here is clearly mentally unwell and they’re indecisive whether they should let their enemy/toy/(up to interpretation) live or not. Some curious lines:

- “It’s not easy having yourself a good time”—in the context of the song, that “good time” implies something wicked.

- “I’m not a gangster tonight, don’t wanna be the bad guy, I’m just a loner, baby, and now you’ve got in my way”—they don’t view themselves as “bad”, however, the next two lines are paradoxal—the singer says they’re alone and yet decide to “mess around” with whoever comes up in their life.

- “No wonder why my heart feels dead inside, it’s hard and cold and petrified”—signifying lack of empathy.

- “It’s a bitch convincing people to like you”—they don’t actually want to do that and see it as a bother.

“Stranded Lullaby”—back to Miracle Musical, back to the theme of isolation. Super lyrical, super musical. They talk about how their memories float around aimlessly in their head, a sea, and may sometimes get lost. The protagonist, a sailor, is losing touch with reality and can’t tell apart what’s a dream anymore and what’s not. They question what they’re going through and why.

“Hidden In The Sand”—a song about longing, in my eyes. The protagonist sings about how “you” love things and how he wishes to love the same things, in the end admitting that “all I’ve wanted was you”. They don’t wish to be separated, they wish to have someone in their life that they could love.

“Now I’m Here”—euphoric. They sing about how they’re alive again, thanks to one specific person. I’m not gonna go too much into this one (partly because it’s a more difficult one for me again, partly because it’s Queen and I don’t wanna uhh talk nonsense on accident lol), but what I got from it is that when one one else saw them, someone did, and they made them “live again”, and now as a result the protagonist is devoted to them.

“&”—really highlights Tally Hall’s album’s theme of black and white and that there shouldn’t be a divide. The repetition of comparing opposites is present throughout the entire song (Weak & Strong & Wet & Dry…) and it’s heavily implied we should “say goodnight” to this mindset. But people love to choose sides, put things into good or bad categories. By the line “They took a lesson from their fathers” it’s implied that people don’t develop this mindset by themselves and are rather influenced by others around them. The whole album is titled “Good & Evil” and Tally Hall examines and criticizes this idea. If we keep dividing people into good and bad, eventually, we’ll all destroy ourselves.

“I’m Gonna Win”—a song about someone who’s struggling to get by. “Sometimes it can seem like a merciless dream”—life can get really hard and the protagonist wonders “what’s really worthwhile”. In the chorus, whoever, they declare that they’re “gonna win” no matter what. They might get “bloody and bruised” but they won’t give up until they “won’t be abused” and until they’re “laughing alone”. No matter how hard life/others kick them down, they’ll keep going. By the lines “It’s hard to be charming and smart and disarming; It’s hard to pretend you’re the best; It’s hard to fulfill everyone’s expectations; It’s hard to keep up with the rest” it’s implied that they find it tiresome to keep up appearances and be liked. It’s challenging to always fit everyone’s expectations, but they’ll continue doing whatever they have to to “win”.

if ranboo ever adds more songs to his playlist, i may add them here too :) 

[artxyra]

I'm not entirely sure that your taking requests (I'm only 68% sure) but if you are can you try doing a daminette fiction based on the song Karma (cover by CMKC) with some class salt? (Maybe even some sibling jasonette or some daminette (or maybe even both...?😏) if you can) Btw I love your writing! 💜 (And before I forget thx for doing my requests, the previous ones and hopefully future ones 💜)

Note: This fics original idea had Marinette being akumatized into KARMA, yeah that didn’t happen when I was writing this one. 

I've lost my mind The skies are crashing around me I'm left behind Smoke obscures all that I can see

“Oh, look, honey, our daughter made her first dress. Get the camera.”

A doll sits on the windowsill overlooking the growing garden on the deck. The doll has blue straw-like hair, bright blue color buttons for eyes, and a black stitched smile.

“Get out! You’re nothing but a pest. How could I care for such a child when you couldn’t do the one thing you brought into this world for.”  

The doll no longer sits on the windowsill, but now lays on in wastebasket. No longer did the doll possess the bright stitch smile. Instead, the face lays bare without a stitch in sight.

“Hey, what are you doing out here all alone? What’s your name?”

“K-ka-karma…”

A small blue jay flutters its wings.  

“I’m Jason. I’ll protect you for now on.”

The blue jay chirps.

A bullet sounds off. A small pull of blood surrounds the bird.

“No!” A thunderous boom goes off in the distance. Multiple sirens join the assembly of loud music. A young pre-teen holds the girl close to his chest, blood oozing out of her chest. A hand touches his shoulder. He shakes it off. Never letting go of her.

Beep…Beep…the heart monitor comes to life slowly. Waiting for the young child to test its system. There is no movement. Then there is silence.   

A dark-haired, blue eye teen, stares into the mirror. Her eyes showing no emotions as her body is littered with markings ranging from cuts to words meant to demean a person.

“Marinette! How could you take credit for Lila’s design?”

The mirror cracks slightly.

 “You have to be an example, Marinette. Your peers look up to you.”

Another crack.

“Marinette how you be mean to that poor girl at your school?”

Another crack.

“I thought you were our everyday Ladybug.”

The mirror shatters. All that is left is darkness.

Marinette stares frozen in place. The gloss in her eyes fading away as the glass falls to the ground, blood in her hand as fragments of glass pierce her skin.

She gasps unsure what to do. Her hands never close as she stares at them with fear. The blood continues to ooze out. The room does dark. A thump.

Her frail arms wrap around her legs tightly. She doesn’t move.

When she comes to, it's by the rushing sound of running water. A waterfall, maybe. She looks up and all she can see is white.

“Why did you do it?” A voice pulls her away from the water. Quickly, she turns around but is halted by a pain aching feeling shooting through her body. She lets out a cry.

“I’m I dead?” Her voice was hoarse, she couldn’t even whisper.

“No,” The voice chuckles. The knobs squeal to life. The water stops following, no longer hitting her in the face. “Are you going to tell me what happened?”

Her mouth opens but no words come out. She begins to breathe heavily like there was no air entering her lungs.

“How could you push Lila down the stairs? Here’s a taste to what Lila felt.”  One moment she was standing top of the stairs getting ready to leave, the next she at the bottom of the platform. Everything was hurting. Then darkness.

Marinette eyes flutter open, there the no hard tile beneath her like earlier but now cotton sheets and a blanket. She could feel her body move, one toe wiggle, two taps against her fingers.

“Jason,” She sits up pulling the blanket closer to her chest. There is no one there.

A wave of sadness washes over her. A glossy shine covers her bluebell eyes.

“Hey, hey, I’m here, Pixie.” The voice was comforting. She curls into herself. His arms wrap around her and pull her close. Whatever happened to her should have never happened.

He looks down, a soft snore escapes her lips. A smile appears on his lips. At least she safe and with him. No longer in that toxic environment.

A phone vibrates. It’s Marinette’s.

Jason unlocks the phone to see a series of messages. None of which are good. The hand holding the phone shakes. He tightens his grip. Slowly the screen begins to crack.

“You’re safe now.” He whispers into her ear. “Your big brother is here to protect you.” The remaining source of light turns off. He stays next to her.

“We are meant for each other M’lady. To halves on the same coin. You belong to me and no one else can have you.” Green eyes haunt her dreams. The cold feeling returns with growing darkness that was all too familiar.

She wakes up screaming. Tears rolling down her cheeks. There was no stopping the waterfall.

Jason runs into the room cursing himself. He knew he should have left but his family needed him for a mission life or death.

“You’re okay, Pixie, no one but you and I are here.” She continues to cry into his chest. He doesn’t mind the dampness he welcomes it. “It was a bad dream, Mari. A really bad dream.” His free hand caresses her hair, calming her down slowly.

“Todd what is the meaning of this.” His little brother asks over the phone. Jason watches as Marinette takes small bits of her food before swirling the remains in her bowl before repeating the process.

“It sounds like you miss me, Demon Spawn.” Jason jokes back, half into the conversation. He keeps his attention on Marinette. “Hold on.” He hangs up before Damian could retort. Marinette had pushed her bowl away from her and picks up the spoon. She looks at her reflection.

“Why would Adrien even spare you a glance. You are ugly, dull, nothing you would do would ever get his attention.”

“Argh.” Something snaps. It was the spoon. Breathing heavily, Marinette staggeringly gets out of her chair.

Jason helps her to the floor. He could see that she wasn’t going to make it far in her current condition.

“Am I not pretty enough.” Jason barely caught her words. He must burry any of the anger he has for those idiots for the sake of his sister.

“You’re magnificent, Pixie. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.” He replies. His phone continues to ring with the familiar ringtone, He ignores it.

“Thank you, Jay-Jay.” Marinette closes her eyes. The ringtone lures her to sleep.

“You’ll never be a real designer, Marinette. One word from him and Gabriel will have you blacklisted from the industry before you even put your name out there.”

“I like to see you try.”

“Marinette Dupain-Cheng, an aspiring fashion designer, has been blacklisted on the bases of copying designers for her work.”

“I told you, Dupain-Cheng, you should have back off when you had the chance.”

Marinette curls into herself as the memories flood back into her mind. She’s alone. The old TV flickers in the darkness. The channel continues to change as the voices, tone, and display changes with each click of a button.

“Why can’t you leave me alone?” She murmurs to no one. Her grip tightens around the blanket.

“What the fuck, Todd? You’ve been gone for days on end and being all secretive.”

“I didn’t think you care about my well-being, Demon. I have a life outside of this shithole.” Jason says as he cleans the barrels of his guns. His younger brother growls. He could only raise an eyebrow.

“I will find out what you’re hiding Todd.”

“Good luck with that.”

Jason picks up his guns and disappears within the shadows of the Batcave.

“Pixie,” The door creaks open. A little bit of light enters the room. Marinette is sleeping on the couch, the blankets cocooning her. Everything seems fine.

“So, she’s what you’ve been hiding.”

“What the fuck?” A gun cocks.  

“Is she your girlfriend?”

“No, my sister in everything but blood.”

“Hmph…why is she here?”

Jason sets his gun down and shuts the door. He turns to Damian; the teen genuinely was curious.

“She needs helps and I’m the only one who can help her. Gina tried but the mental and physical abuse became too much to manage. So, for her protection, Gina sent her to me.” Popping the cork off the bottle, Jason pours himself a drink.

“Does father know?”

“If he did, she would have been adopted in the family by now.” Jason pours himself another glass. Damian scoffs at the out his brother is drinking.

“Ladybug is hereby declared an enemy of Paris.”

“Tikki, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”  

“What do you mean you’re no longer going to be Ladybug? You’re a true creation soul. A true holder of the ladybug miraculous.”

“Find someone else to do it, Master. You heard the Mayor, I’m an enemy of Paris, no better than Hawkmoth and Mayura.” She hands him the ladybug miraculous. Her red eyes close at the thought of losing her best friend.

Marinette wakes up sweating, her hand immediately reaching for her ears. Nothing. She sighs and curls back up.

“She’s been through a lot Damian, whatever scheme you have in mind leave it be and forget about it.”

Swinging her legs over the bed, Marinette sneaks over to the door. The door opens just enough for her to rest her hand against the doorframe.

“Jay-Jay…” Her voice was a whisper again.

Jason pushes the bottle and glass to the side. He’s by her side examining her. She wasn’t hurt.

“Pixie, you should be sleeping.”

“I had another nightmare.” She tells him. “Who’s your friend?”

Damian shuffles in place. She’s so tiny compare to any of his sisters like the wind could just blow her over without even trying.

“I’m Damian.” He tells her.

Marinette gives him a curt nod. Her eyes lock onto his. They’re green. She could feel her chest tightening. No air could get in or out. The glossy look returns in her eye turn.

Sobbing Marinette screams out, “Je vais le faire, Chat Noir. Je vais le faire, arrête!” She slides the down the doorway.

“Shit,” Jason runs over to Marinette. She blocks her view of Damian. Her lock on the green eyes soon fades to blue. Jason’s eyes. She tightly wraps her arms around his neck. Jason rubs her back. Turning to Damian all while keeping him out of Marinette’s sight, he tells his brother, “We’ll finish this later. Your eye color triggered a memory. And Damian, do not tell anyone about her.”

Damian is frozen in place. So much had happened in the last ten or so minutes. He had met the most beautiful girl he has ever seen and then she has a panic attack, something clearly triggered by previous trauma.

“Okay, I won’t tell.” The youngest Wayne agrees but not without weighing the pros and cons. He left the small rundown apartment with more questions than answers.

Jason turns his attention back to Marinette, who’s sobs turn into sniffles. “He can’t hurt you anymore. He can’t hurt you anymore, Pixie.” Marinette buries her head into Jason’s chest. She takes a deep breath. She can only hope.

Now you've used up all your luck It's time to get what you deserve I'm holding out for KARMA I'm holding out to watch you burn

Years past before Marinette was completely healed. Gina would visit from time to time making sure that her granddaughter was okay. She was ecstatic to find that Marinette was healing even if it was a slow process.

“Are you ready?” Marinette turns to Damian; his green eyes hold so much love and care for her than the green eyes she had grown to hate. Nodding, she takes his hand.

Beyond the doors, a series of lights flashes along with shouts. Reporters are in a frenzy trying to get the latest scoop on the Wayne heir’s beloved. Never once had she made a public appearance.

“Yes, thank you all for coming and showing my family your support. Today marks a very special achievement, my young son proposed to his girlfriend just a couple of days ago much to my second oldest dismay.”

Jason disrupts Bruce’s speech by shouting, “Hey” from his location next to Roy.

“Please welcome my son and his fiancée, Marinette Karma Todd.” Bruce steps away from the podium. The doors behind him open to show Marinette holding hands with Damian. She grips his hand tightly as Damian gives her a reassuring smile.

In Paris, several people are thrown in for a loop. Several lawsuits were issued. Collège Françoise Dupont, the school board was not happy at the treatment of one their student, a student that would grow to become one of the most powerful women out there.

Adrien Agreste, who was outed as Chat Noir, received a sexual harassment charge and a restraining order. The Wayne’s were out for blood and wanted to add attempted rape charge and compensation for all the trauma he had caused Marinette.

Lila Rossi, who managed to keep a tight grip on her classmates was finally exposed. Apparently, her latest lie was about being the mysterious Damian Wayne’s girlfriend. That backfired. She was then hit a cease and desist order along with a restraining order. Marinette had won the war.

Alya, who never learned to check her sources, lost any and every opportunity in her field. She even lost her job because she published a story about her best friend being the Wayne heir’s girlfriend. Thankfully, for the business, that article was only hosted in Paris, but the damage was already done.

Marinette never sent anything to her adopted parents. They didn’t deserve her. She was their servant, someone to help with the bakery. Though they were better than her birth parents, she couldn’t find it in her to ruin their lives. Gina became her legal guardian and that was that.

“I’m so glad that I meet you,” Damian says to her, placing a kiss on her hand. Marinette giggles and pulls Damian in for an embrace.

“I’m the lucky one. You would have thought this would be my future.” Marinette gestures to their growing empire. It was small but with Wayne Enterprise and Damian’s Veterinarian business, they were doing quite fine.

“Can I offer you a dance, Angel?”

“I would love that.”

No music plays just the beat of their hearts as one.

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[deans-haunted-baby]

Curious. What do you mean by Dust till Dawn going against it's Characters? I know I have my own feelings, or confusion, with how they left Kate's story.

From Dusk Till Dawn effectively character assassinated every single character in the very last episode including Kate Fuller. No one is acting like themselves in that series finale it's like some deranged fanfic writer came aboard and hijacked the show while no one was looking. If you thought 15x18 & 15x19 of Supernatural were bad and believe me they really are; those episodes are minorly salvageable against the slaughterhouse that Dusk 3x10 was. It utterly contradicts and ignores everything the show put forward in all 3 seasons. I will never watch that episode again.

I'll first explain what that piece of shit did to the show's lead protagonists, the Gecko brothers. Regardless of how you or anyone else feels about Supernatural's series finale; that show was a saint to Sam and Dean's storyline beginning to end compared to how From Dusk Till Dawn definitively butchered Richie and Seth. I'm sad saying this because Zane Holtz and DJ Controna are outstanding as these characters. I freaking love their chemistry man, it's a great rival to J2! They're the badass dark clones of the Winchesters.  Their arc starts out fascinatingly complex because they went from cold-blooded criminals/bad guys and meanwhile during their escape over the Mexican border with this hostage family the audience is told pretty quick by Professor Aiden Tanner that the Geckos are destined to become these foresworn warriors The Mayan Hero Twins in an ancient prophecy (based on real Mesoamerican lore) who battle the Underworld. So right away the show is telling us ahead where Seth and Richie are suppose to end up in their journey and when you introduce a storyline this big I expect a satisfying payoff.

At the end of season 1, Richie Gecko is *SPOILER ALERT* transformed into a culebra (snake-vampire) while Seth Gecko remains human symbolizing their night and day Hero Twin counterparts from the legend. And they're separated in the first half of season 2 where both try to navigate this new supernatural world they've stumbled on individually. What they find, no different than the Winchesters, is that neither can function properly without the other making their destiny all the more valid. That season is practically constructed like their swan song to the criminal lifestyle since the brothers are meant to become more than crooks; and since Richie's a vampire they can't ever go back to basics. Their adopted father aka uncle Eddie actually says the line "this is my swan song" in 2x07 to Seth and Richie in reference to their final heist together which is not a coincidence. That's the writers telling us that the Gecko Brothers' role in the show is going to shift from anti-heroes to heroes very soon. Eddie and Kate Fuller's fates in S2 act as the primary catalysts for this transition taking shape in the finale.

Going into season 3 it's business as usual for the boys until the prophecy of the twins officially rips a hole in the damn universe via demon queen Amaru. Who's now possessing Kate. Throughout that season Seth and Richie embark on a journey of heroism; find themselves battling monsters, actually saving civilians and dealing with their own personal demons (guilt and remorse over past sins). That year is presented as their redemption arc and final phase into their new role. No one ever tells them about their destiny (despite most of the other characters knowing) but we as the audience are already aware as we watch the brothers in action. The best episode is without a doubt 3x06 the crown jewel of From Dusk Till Dawn because it's about overcoming the darkness inside. And who best represents that than Richie; the show's most important central character whom began the series as a deadly clairvoyant criminal into the tortured vampire hero struggling with his own humanity. Now I won't spoil the whole episode for anyone who hasn't seen it or the show in general but it's an incredible moment of character development for both the Gecko brothers. Not only does it cement their powerful bond it's the episode that defines who these two are once and for all. The ones who lead the battle between good and evil; keep the balance of light and darkness. One day I plan to do an entire analysis of that episode because it's so fucking brilliant and shot so incredibly eerie at the same time 😁

You want to know what 3x10 does to these characters? It shits all over their entire storyline and pisses away THREE FUCKING SEASONS of character development. Just flushes it all down the toilet rendering everything they've ever done up to that point completely pointless! Their destiny which is the WHOLE POINT OF THE SHOW is suddenly dropped last minute and the Geckos hit reset on their former criminal escapades; dragging Kate along with them. I hate that finale with the fire of a thousand suns for what it does to Richie and Seth 😡

Moving on to Carlos Madrigal. He is the best villain character in the history of show villains hands down. I can actually say that without blinking. Wilmer Valderama is phenomenal, he steals the show as Carlos. He's is so freaking awesome, evil and badass! I just want to keep seeing this man tear things apart while being the sexy asshole he is 😈For all intents and purposes I don't want to spoil his whole storyline on the show for those following me in case they're interested. But what I will say is 3x10 destroys this character; so don't watch it if you want to keep the memory of who he was alive. I'm actually depressed over what was done to him as much as I feel sorry for Wilmer having to perform that shitty script. It's laughable in a very bad way. Gotta hand it to the writers and showrunners of FDTD they certainly knew how to humiliate their best characters in this series. Carlos basically goes from charismatic yet lethal Hannibal Lecter to a very captain obvious Gandolf caricature. Yah you heard that right, it's really fucking sad.

Next we have Freddie Gonzalez; the audience's avatar into the series. This character is connected to everyone on the show for a reason because of the crucial part he plays in this universe. The "Peacekeeper" destined to police the line between the supernatural world from the human world. In the beginning he's a Texas deputy on a quest to avenge the murder of his father figure/partner Earl McGraw via the Gecko Brothers. But once he steps in that territory of monsters there's no going back. And FDTD repeatedly tells him and the audience this in the first 2 seasons. But then 3x10 pulls the ultimate fuckery by giving him the most cliched, nonsensical hallmark ending effectively cancelling out his entire purpose in the series. He instantly forgets that he ever cared about Kate, watching her bleed out on the ground, then leaves the Geckos high and dry rushing his family (who isn't injured) to the hospital. And he stays there while the battle continues 😣

Kate and Scott Fuller OMG words cannot describe my anger over what was done to them so I'll make it fast. I'll begin with Kate the bright light and heart of the series. Her arc in the first two seasons is excellent. It's emotionally driven because she begins as an ordinary girl in broken yet seemingly-happy family to a young woman finding her way around the supernatural world maintaining her faith and moral compos while trying to help her brother after he's *SPOILER ALERT* been turned into a vampire; paralleling the Geckos's situation. Scott being only a 16 year old kid, like Richie, struggles immensely after his transformation; searching for meaning as a cursed individual and coping with his duality. He was already different to begin with so being a vampire adds some interesting layers to his character.

Btw Kate plays a vital role in Richie and Seth's lives, though in my opinion is more strongly connected to Richie. The show even goes as far as developing the early glimpses of a romantic arc between Kate and Richie (seeing as they kiss twice) with angst at the end of season 2 that is never resolved. You want to know why it wasn't? Not only does season 3 mute Kate's voice and agency but 3x10 ruins her character and demolishes her whole arc with Richie (who spent all of season 3 trying to save her) at the last second due to fan pressure of those who shipped her with Seth. They don't exchange one word nor barely look at one another it's like seasons 1&2 never happened. This is the biggest fuck you to fans of these characters I've ever witnessed in a series and they did my boys Adam and Michael so dirty in Supernatural. Poor Scott whom the show enjoyed kicking around all season barely gets a thing to do in that series finale either than listening to his sister and Seth gab about prom lol. Yah you heard me I'm not making this shit up I swear. Then he gets abandoned by Kate while she goes off to be a bank robber with the character assassinated versions of Seth and Richie. How extraordinary 😖

Santanico Pandemonium is really the only character in the series who manages to get out unscathed. HOWEVER her arc is handled very poorly beginning to end. They set up an arc between her and Seth that also goes absolutely nowhere. Give her zero closure with Richie whom she sired, dated and used in S2. And randomly throw her in a scene with Kate that makes no fucking sense after these two had nothing to do with one another all series. On top of that Santanico is barely in season 3 so by the time the show wraps her arc feels incomplete.

Other characters go missing that no one notices, the new bad guy whom they've set up at the end is just left hanging. And Richie Gecko, you know the show’s other lead, is horribly sidelined after 3x06 to make way for the Seth Gecko solo show. When I say FDTD series finale is bad I mean it's really fucking terrible and blasphemous.

[botwstoriesandsuch]

im loving the history lesson posts!!! what are you're thoughts on the ruins in Tabantha? based on the memory near the skywatchers and the shrine quests in the region, the stone ruins in tabantha existed about 10,000 years ago and were destroyed or vacated and left to crumble. but the stone structures contrast heavily with the wooden architecture of Rito Village? bUT if i'm remembering correctly the song lyrics go "pride of the rito/pillar to the sky" so the rito stone and tabantha itself has (1)

Ok first off, I AM SO SORRY! I read this ask months ago and I worked on it in my google docs and then I was going pure theory mode and then another person sent in another ask about ruins and I was getting all excited so basically long story short I got so caught up in making a masterlist of all the ruins that I completely forgot about this ask until now... So anon I apologize for the terrible wait but hopefully you’ll still enjoy what I have in planned. 

You’ve given me a lot to work with so I’m going to break this up into several posts based on your asks. I’m gonna post them on different days becauseeeee content management, schedules, things.....I’m lazy and also if I posted all my thoughts in one post it would be like a giant book with zero pacing so

[Today] Thoughts on the Ancient Columns and the Ruins of Tabantha

[Some time later idk when I post it I’ll shove the link here] The Effects of the Calamity on the Rito and People of Hyrule

The Relationship between Skywatcher Locations and the Cunning of Calamity Ganon

Buckled in ladies, lads, and gentlefolk? It’s time for a history lesson, Part 1 o’ Trois. So today here is

Ancient Ruins, Architectural Parallels, and the Probable Worship of the Fae

So! Let’s start with the ruins of Tabantha. Specifically, the Ancient Columns. 

Anon you’re correct in that these ruins are over 10,000 years old. We can not only gather this from the fact that their condition is the same even 100 years ago, meaning they have to be older than a century (see their crumbled state and similar moss patterns) but also from direct lines from the Creating a Champion (CaC) book itself. 

However, I’m inclined to believe (for several reasons that I’m going to get into) that these ruins have nothing to do with the “pillar in the sky” as mentioned in the Rito songs. For one, the pillar of Rito village is of an entirely different architectural style, given that it looks like the natural work of wind erosion. And for another, the existence of the Rito village pillar has to have been much younger, around 100 years old, in order to coincide with the Sheikah Shrine quest, as the Sheikah platform thingy has to correlate with the characteristics of the pillar’s shape. Ergo, ergo, ergo, the “pillar in the sky” isn’t 10,000 years old and has no correlation with the Ancient Columns.

Ok so! Back to the actual ruins themselves and what we can analyze from them. 

Circled above is every instance of ruins in the Tabantha region. Although I should specify that I’m talking about the Ancient Hylian ruins, as that is the type that is most notably scattered across this area. 

We know that all these ruins are off the same civilization because of their style and material. 

[Remember this picture for later^^]

In addition, we can also tell from ruin maps in the CaC book that these ruins are from the same Hylian civilization, as well as the important detail that these ruins were centered around the Goddess. 

Citing that other screenshot at the beginning on the Ancient Hylian Culture, these ruins were built around the same time as the Sacred Springs, so I think it’s safe to assume that these ruins had a religious purpose.  

But I can take this one step further! Up until now, all this information has been based on interpretations from the botw ruins and official info alone, but if we take into account the real life counterparts/parallels, I can prove the exact purpose to what these ruins are for!

Firstly, these ruins are obviously inspired by architecture in Ancient Greece, and other old Empires (like the Romans and Byzantines) across the Mediterranean. 

We also know that the ruins are constructed out of limestone. One, because moss is able to grow on it, so it is unlikely that it is marble. And two, we can see the actual limestone texture when seeing the broken parts of certain columns and walls. 

[and kinda quick side note here: but the existence of large limestone rich structures 10,000 years ago gives more credit to the theory that Botw takes place after a large flood, notably the events of Wind Waker. One, because limestone is a material mined near the sea, as seen with the Island of Paros and Naxos for the Ancient Greeks. And Two, this ancient sea was directly mentioned in the description for botw rock salt. And also Three, this explains the weird placement of certain structures, such as the buildings placed on suspended and isolated rocky plateaus like the ones I showed earlier by the Skywatchers. So there’s your mini theory which kinda proves that the Tanagar Canyon was probably an ocean trench at one point and it also still proves my connection of the Ancient Hylian ruins being parallels to the Ancient Greeks and all that because...ocean. Greece, peninsula, hundreds of islands, lots of quarries in Hyrule by the sea. Akkala is by the sea, there’s quarries, also the islands with mining equipment like Tingle Island. You get it by now right?]

Anyway. Greeks, Romans, polytheistic gods, temples for sacrifices, limestone, yadayadayada. Safe to assume that these Hylian ruins were of a civilization centered around a temple of some sort worshiping a powerful being, or beings, such Hylia. Hurray! Theory seems done.

BUT!

I can take it

A step FURTHER!!!

You see, I was originally gonna leave this post at that. The Ancient Columns are of an Ancient Hylian civilization 10,000 years ago that worshiped some higher powers. “Great!” I think to myself. “Time to get all my screenshots so that my ADHD followers wont die immediately” 

But but but! As I was spending an hour or so getting said screenshots, I took this picture right here and came across a revelation so bright you could have placed a light bulb over my head... 

A pretty enough capture, got a nice aerial view of the ruins, the suspended island thing in the middle of the path... nice view of Tanagar Canyon and the Ancient Columns, the sunset is all pretty and—Oh hey! The Great Fairy Fountain is there. Heh, that’s nice. You know it’s kinda weird that it’s just plopped right in the middle of all these Ancient ruin and temp—

BAadaBing, badaBoom, ladies, lads, and gentlefolk! I’m here to tell ya that these giant fae ladies were once worshiped by 10,000 year old Hylian civilizations. And not just this fairy mind you, but all four of them.

First piece of evidence? The proximity of 10,000 year old structures to every Great Fairy. Mind you, these are the most rare type of ruin in the game. 90% of the ruins are of settlements destroyed 100 years ago by the Calamity, and then the other 10% is still divide up between the Ancient Sheikah and Zonai. So I find it quite interesting that almost every case these special ruined civilizations are near a Great Fairy. [Uh, spoilers for all the Great Fairy locations btw]

First, of course, you got the Great Fairy in Tabantha. 

Then you got the one in Akkala, by the Torrin Wetlands (again, the highlights in yellow are of the canonical 10,000 year old Hylian ruins)

The Lanayru Promenade isn’t even up for debate at this point....I mean it was the parade ground for the ceremony up to the Spring of Wisdom. How much more “Ancient Hylian” can you get then that?

The only kinda iffy one is the Great Fairy in the Gerudo desert, but even THEN this fairy is by two out of the three only instances of 10,000 year old ruins in the entire desert, the third instance being the Zonai labyrinth. 

But, sure. Correlation might not equal causation. But I think the picture becomes all the more clear when you take a look at the timeline of events!

Note that no one in Hyrule really knows what the fairies are all about. Sure, you got that one researched in Tabantha that knew about one of them, and some of the elders in Kakariko had a sort of understanding that a fairy was their neighbor. However, their stance was that of wariness and caution, and they very much did not worship or give offerings to them. Dorian, for example explicitly shows suspicion towards the fairy, and thinks they might be dangerous. (Which, to be fair, is valid if you’ve ever read ANYTHING about the fae)

My point is, people don’t know what the Great Fairies are, or what their powers, motives, or *anything* really are. Sure, 100 years might have passed, but it would be pretty hard to forget something as eye catching as the fae. The people of Hyrule can remember century old white horses, cook books, treasure locations, ancient songs, and vague legends, but the majority of them don’t know about the Giant (seriously, it’s right in the name) Fairy Fountains?!

That is, of course, under the assumption that the Great Fairies existence was known 100 years ago. But what if it wasn’t?

You might be inclined to assume that the fairies lost their power because the Calamity prevented them from getting offerings 100 years ago, but in truth, there is no evidence whatsoever saying that their lack of power originated at the rise of Calamity. 

It’s entirely likely that they haven’t been sitting around for 100 years, but 10,000, or even more. It explains why no one knows anything about them, and also their proximity to the ruins. 

A beautiful spring you say? You power is directly correlated to offerings you say? 

Gee if only there was some ancient civilization that existed a long time ago, that has ties to old religious practices, temples, and polytheistic, which has parallels to the Ancient Greeks and Romans who build their civilizations centering around certain gods and offerings to said powers, and also if only these said civilizations were nearby to all of the fae oh WAIT!

Even when Link gives his offerings, the results are only that of the Great Fairy Fountain blooming, not an entire spring. Could an entire spring existed long ago, providing for the hundreds or thousands of people who worshiped the fae? Who’s to say that these old 10,000 year old civilizations gave offerings to the fae not only for the magic and all that, but for the vitality and life that they provide? Who’s to say that those earlier relief arts of warriors on chariots were of people with enhanced armour. Fairies that give you magic defense would be quit helpful for a civilization that liked to battle... the possibilities are endless....

TL;DR, the Ancient Columns, along with the other 10,000 year old Hylian structures, were constructed for religious purposes, centering around the Great Fairies, who accepted their offerings in exchange for the vitality of their springs, as well as their enchantments. 

So! That’s that. Can you believe this is just me tackling only one aspect of anon’s ask? I realize that the majority of the ask was about the Rito but...oops! That’s why I split it into parts. [When I post the other posts I’ll update the contents at the top to link to them]

A like and reblog is appreciated! I spent too long on this, including an extra week because tumblr deleted my original draft which was much longer... so if you liked it, let me know! It’d be nice to know that my time didn’t completely go to waste, :P Anyhow thanks for reading all this

[stained-brutal-crackpot]

I COME WANTING MORE INFO how would the disaster trio react to the player killing or defeating Yharim and Xeroc? I love how you write them btw

I talk too much I'm sorry lmao

But yeah, these characters live in my head rent free and make me pay for it.

Silva personally requests that they bring her Yharim's head so that she can use it as a flowerpot. She also does her fair share of gloating, because honestly, she deserves it.

("I would've asked for his heart, but I believe it is common knowledge that he does not have one.")

Once he's dead, she just fucking loses it. Screaming in pure pent-up rage, practically crying her damn eyes out, and laughing harder than she ever has in her entire life all at the same time. She wishes she could've killed Yharim herself— wishes she could've seen the look on his face when he realized he was well and truly fucked— but at least he's dead.

After that whole ordeal, she decides to stay conscious a while longer, stay with the Terrarian and her friends to protect all three of them. She doesn't want this to happen again, doesn't want some new tyrant to crawl out of a hole somewhere and repeat Yharim's mistakes by utterly fucking up the world.

And as for Xeroc? Congrats, you get to see one of the rare times when Silva actually appears to give a shit about the Terrarian and their safety. She does not have pleasant memories in regards to her allies running off to fight omni powerful beings just for the fuck of it, and I wonder why. Basically, she gets mad. Really fucking mad.

("Are you stupid?! Why in hell would you try to fight Xeroc? What are you trying to accomplish?! You had better hope that your pathetic desire for glory is worth dying for, because you are only throwing your life away!")

After the player actually succeeds in "defeating" Xeroc, well. She loosens up considerably, and starts treating them with some kind of grudging respect.. even if by that I just mean she's less of a dick to them.

Braelor doesn't even look at the Terrarian or Yharim, once he dies. He just wants to forget about all of this already— after so long spent fighting it's hard to comprehend the feeling of actually being able to live free and in peace. He just turns around and walks away, intending to either A) take a much-needed nap, B) have a long talk with Statis and Silva, or C) get drunk off his ass, courtesy of Cirrus.

More than anyone, he knows how much suffering can come from resentment and grudges allowed to fester in hatred. So he lets go of everything and just tries to move on.

He's admittedly not sure what to do, now that there's no war to win. But the Terrarian has open room at their base and there are people here who he really doesn't mind living with, so he's content to chill here with his friends until they've figured something out.

Since he isn't, y'know, a god or anything like that, unlike Silva or Yharim, he's not quite sure how to feel about Xeroc. After all, they've had their own battles raging already without divine intervention or anything of the sort, so he's never really had to think about it. But Silva seems to think it's an awful idea, and he doesn't particularly want the Terrarian (who at this point he considers a friend) going off to get vaporized, so he's pretty much against it— but is hella impressed when they manage to not fucking die. He doesn't really get what's going on or why they'd even want to fight God, but he's happy for them nonetheless.

As for Statis, well.. Yharim might be dead, but his struggles are not over. See, since he was a kid, it was always fighting something. Fighting the royal family, fighting traitors to his clan, fighting the tyrant's armies one day. That's basically all he knows how to do, so it takes him a long, long time to get used to living a peaceful life. He hardly even reacts to learning about Yharim's defeat, and instead just goes to find Braelor and Silva so that he can talk to them.

He doesn't know what to do anymore, but he's not content with just living aimlessly either. Since his friends seem like they want to stay with the Terrarian, he'll stay too, but until they can figure out something, he's just going to be restless and dissatisfied with mostly everything.

But as long as he has the people he cares about.. he'll try to move forward. They're safe, and that's really the best any of them can ask for.

When the Terrarian first expresses their intention of fighting Xeroc, he's in disbelief. This motherfucker really thinks they can stack up against capital-G God? He's softened up more towards them since they took down Yharim, but he still kinda thinks they're an idiot, especially now. But in the end, it's their life, so he doesn't much care what they do now that his biggest enemy is dead.

("What are you even hoping to do by winning this..? You understand that your life is now essentially forfeit, correct? Well.. Go forward and try, if you wish. None of us can stop you.")

Once they've won, he essentially just decides that they can do whatever they want, and he'll keep his opinions to himself. By now he respects them more, and treats them with civil politeness. Things should start getting better from here on out, and he'll be there to make sure it all goes smoothly.

[yaz-the-spaz]

But I want to know your theory. :(

ok ok i guess i’ll spill…i was kinda hesitant to share just cause i’m still not all that solid in my belief in it myself but basically it seems like maybe ziam has made it a tradition to have some kind of couples trip most years (if not every year) in february ever since 2014…

(btw for future reference this ask is a continuation of this ask re ziam both being publicly in vegas earlier this year)

ugh sorry guys! hit enter by accident and posted this wayyyy before i was anywhere near finished lol…this will be updated within the hour (if it doesn’t take me too long to get my thoughts out)

narrator: she did not finish it within the hour.

…

ok so part of the reason i’ve been hesitant to share this is because a good portion of it is VERY speculative and just based on a lot of guesswork and assumptions, but also there’s the fact that it feels like this is something major that more people in the fandom (or at least someone, other than little ass me lol) would have noticed before now and it kind of freaks me out that maybe no one else has?? (unless ofc i just haven’t happened to see any other posts there are about it idk)… 

also fyi a lot of what i propose throughout this is heavily based on info from this post just to make sure i remember to site my sources before we get into it lol

alright now onto the actual theory…

SO. all this started with me scrolling through old posts from late 2013/early 2014 and being reminded of the fuckery that was zayn’s bday that year (with the douche canoe crew and everyone pretending like liam was barely there as seemingly some sort of weird over-the-top cover-up)…the same party that seemed kinda like liam’s possible “introduction” to the malik family as more than just zayn’s friend/as his possible significant other. which was also only a month after that suspicious engagement-looking ring first showed up on zayn’s ring finger in december 2013 from bts midnight memories mv footage (and which stayed around as a necklace throughout january 2014 and early febuary 2014 right before the first appearance/debut of the mandala tat in mid feb). 

bts midnight memories mv with the ring in view - dec 2013:

(suspicious?) malik family outing/celebration with the ring in view - dec (or possibly late nov?) 2013:

[putting the rest under the cut cause as per usual with me this got insanely long]

liam and aunt zileh at zayn’s bday party - jan 2014:

liam and one of the little cousins at zayn’s bday party - jan 2014:

then sometime in between late jan and early feb 2014 liam went on a trip to barbados with his whole family (and supposedly also sophia lol more on that later*) while zayn was SUPPOSEDLY still home and steadily “posting” pics of himself at home with various members of his family (with the ring on a necklace clearly visible in the pics lol), anddd as some have also pointed out his hair was suspiciously unchanged in these pics despite his claim of getting a haircut BEFORE most of the pics were posted lol

zayn in family pics with the ring on a necklace - late jan/early feb 2014 (sorry i’m not the one who cropped his fam out lol):

but yet we’re supposed to believe zayn - who had just gotten awarded the asian ambassadorship for the VERY FIRST time - mysteriously (and willingly) MISSED the ceremony on feb. 5th with absolutely no explanation. which…we all know how big a deal that was to him from the way he talked about it and how honored he was when he went in 2015…which begs the question if he was really just home not doing much of anything at the time in 2014 why in the world would he just pass/bail on that HUGE HONOR with no explanation??? mayhaps because he was actually already an ocean away with liam and fam in barbados celebrating his engagement (and getting his own “introduction” to the payne family) and literally COULD NOT ATTEND?

anyway so then, we have him getting the mandala tat around feb 18th 2014 - or at least this is the day he debuted it on his old ig, so the date may be a few days off from when he actually got it - but this still would’ve been shortly after they got back from the barbados trip when he debuted this particular tat (aka another solidification of the engagement??) 

THEN we get the very first ig ziam likes from the famous and beloved aunt zileh (!!!) in this same month (still feb for reference, but she continues steadily and heavily liking stuff all the way through april when she seems to cool down again). fast forward to the 2014 brits at the end of february where we have the infamous moment with 1) ziam giddy as fucking ever, 2) zayn whispering into and practically mawling liam’s neck in public, 3) liam talking about how it was great to “fill each other in” on what they were up to during their break while zayn’s just steady standing there smiling like a loon and then 4) liam still later being like ‘you don’t wanna know’ when asked what he got up to (and zayn still grinning like a fool)

ziam being gross at brits 2014:

so to sum up so far: 1) one of them possibly proposed around nov/dec 2013 (or that’s my best guess anyway based on the evidence lol), 2) then zayn shows up with a suspiciously-engagement-looking ring in dec 2013, 3) then all the weirdness with liam’s attendance at zayn’s bday party a month later (possibly also liam’s formal intro to the malik family), 4) then liam takes his barbados trip with his fam (and supposedly sophia lol*) just a couple weeks later while “zayn” stays home and posts family pics (but is very likely secretly on the trip with liam lol which is also possibly zayn’s formal intro the payne family and a belated celebration of their engagement), 5) and then we get the beginning of aunt zileh’s likes, 6) the debut of zayn’s mandala tat, 7) and the 2014 brits wildness…all in the space of like 3 months. and most of it happening in FEBRUARY. what a wild fucking journey right?

*side note/fun fact: liam and his fam were posting stuff regularly throughout the duration of the barbados vacay but there were literally zero pics of sophia posted from this trip until like dec 2014 or sometime around then when like ONE random pic suddenly surfaced/was posted and lots of ppl had already speculated that sophia was never there in the first place so once this one pic came up that idea got upgraded to people theorizing that they maybe had some of the fam go back a second time later in the year just to stage take photos to retroactively prove/authenticate the narrative that sophia was there lol

but anyway so back to the actual matter at hand - most of that shit happened in february right? specifically the barbados trip (aka the possible engagement celebration trip)…and when i was talking about all this to a friend we realized ZIAMI WAS ALSO IN FEBRUARY. AND SO WAS THIS YEAR’S VEGAS SHIT. AND THEN. AND THEN. My friend did some research and there was apparently this little known/barely talked about article (or at least barely talked about that i’m aware of) about liam taking a TRIP TO THE MALDIVES IN FEBRUARY 2016… which coincidentally (or not lol considering these shady ass hoes) is also around the same time he got his 4 tattoo (I believe this was the first article, or at least one of the first articles, that mentioned the tat’s debut) 

BUT WAIT. 

THE INSANE SHIT DOES NOT END THERE FOLKS.

GUESS WHICH MONTH THE CARTIER BRACELET FIRST DEBUTED?

FUCKING FEBRUARY 2016.

specifically on liam’s wrist in preparation for the 2016 brits (photo posted to his brits stylist’s ig on feb 23rd). and he didn’t take it off till like june.

so. quick timeline:

february 2016 - maldives trip and debut of liam’s 4 tattoo (around feb 21st); debut of cartier bracelet via liam (feb 23rd); (there was also that valentine’s day roses pic liam posted feb 14th of this year which was quite interesting considering he and c hadn’t even been officially announced as a “thing” yet…ofc we know it still got retroactively attributed to her anyway but whatever, we all know who it was really for lol 😏)

february 2017 - i don’t have anything on this year, partly cause i stopped paying as close attention due to heavy ramping up of stunts, although if anyone has more concrete info on this period that hints at anything please do hit me up and i will add it in, but anyway just based on a little light research there does appear to be a good period of inactivity from both of them during this time (as in both of them had quite a bit of time in february where they were pretty inactive on sm, not being papped, and essentially mia and would have potentially had time to go on a private trip) - UPDATE: HOLY SHIT I CANNOT BELIEVE I FORGOT ABOUT THIS BUT THIS IS THE YEAR LIAM SHOWED UP AT THE BRITS WITH THE MOTHERFUCKING 25 ON HIS JACKET AND FUCKED SIMON ALL THE WAY UP BY SWERVING ON HIS UGLY BITCH ASS SPEECH IN FRONT OF GOD AND ENTIRE WORLD (and i think also thanked zayn in his speech if i’m not mixing that up with another year??) - all on feb 23rd to be specific.

february 2018 - ZIAMI OBVIOUSLY (which specifically started feb 22nd, or at least that’s the day i’m counting it as ‘started’ cause it’s the day liam joined zayn in miami, can’t recall the exact day zayn arrived but pretty sure it was only a couple days before that)

february 2019 - zayn starts wearing this distinctive fishhook earring in all his ig pics, which on the surface seems like a pretty small thing, but quite possibly commemorates their famous august 2014 fishing trip (directly after which he also started wearing a fish hook pendant on a necklace back in 2014); this was also another period they were pretty quiet/mia as far as i can recall, although again if anybody has more concrete info from this time that could point to something please let me know, but anyway point being they again would have had a good chunk of time to possibly go on a private trip together

february 2020 - VEGAS BABY

ofc i’m sure you all will notice one year was left out - february 2015 they were on tour with no breaks coming anytime soon so they obviously weren’t able to go on a trip that year. BUT. february 14th 2015 (aka valentine’s day lol) is also the day liam was famously papped with some small shopping bags that looked suspiciously but precisely like the type that usually come from a jewelry store, and then later that same night they had a performance (for otra tour) where we have zayn pictured wearing a new gold bracelet (as in he hadn’t been seen wearing it ever before on tour or anywhere else) - btw the op of this linked post actually marks this day as the debut of the cartier bracelet but there’s a lot of counter speculation that it’s not and given that it doesn’t quite look like the cartier bracelet looked in later pics (it’s more round and more gold than the cartier bracelet which imo looks more angular and more kind of a two-tone/silvery-gold than this vday bracelet) i’m inclined to lean more towards it just being a regular but still very sweet vday-gifted bracelet. but anyway back to more important stuff. now considering this was literally just a little over a month before zayn left - and one of my theories for zayn leaving was that it was possible he felt it was the only way to save his relationship with liam…i mean if they were still giving each other vday presents they were clearly still VERY in love at this point. like that’s not the kind of thing you’d expect from a couple that was on the rocks and on the verge of breaking up and i know a lot of ppl (myself included for a brief minute) speculated that zayn leaving the band meant he maybe left liam too/or things weren’t working out b/t them or whatever, but given this context of the vday gifts just a few weeks before him leaving that doesn’t really line up…what does line up though is him being so in love and so sick of the bs that he might be driven to just be done with it all (as far as the stress of the band and mgmt bs is concerned at least). and ofc liam did say that zayn is the most emotionally impulsive/emotionally driven out of all them so when you think about it it really shouldn’t come as that much of a surprise…

anyway, in conclusion: 

it appears quite possible ziam has made it a couples tradition (ever since that first honeymoonish vacay in 2014) to go on some sort of trip/getaway together around the end of every february (or at least do something special together/for each other when they can’t) and in further conclusion I AM NOT OKAY AND WILL NEVER BE OVER THIS REALIZATION OKAY THANKS BYE 😭😭😭😭😭🌈🌈🌈 

[sun-kissed-star]

Could u write albert/race (platonic or romantic) w adhd!race (btw i l o v e ur fics)

thank u love, just for you here’s a fic of me projecting on race, ft. an asshole date and albert being a sweetheart

trigger warning: ableist language

~~~~~~~

“Come to the park with me on my date, he said,” Albert muttered to himself, swatting a branch out of his face. “It’ll be fun, he said.”

In any given situation, Albert would rather stab out his left eyeball with a spork than be a third-wheel on a date. It made him anxious and turned him from calm and collected to a shy, awkward mess in a matter of seconds. 

Apparently, all those things went out the window when Race was involved. Albert guessed it was fair, anyway. Race had met a cute boy named Kevin at a party, been asked out on a date, and proceeded to beg Albert to come with him. He’d barely talked to the boy and he was “too young and pretty to be murdered on a first date.” (Race’s words, not Albert’s.)

Besides, it wasn’t really third-wheeling. Not when Albert was crouched in a tree, watching Kevin slip his hand into Race’s. It was technically called stalking. 

“You having fun?” Kevin said to Race. They were sitting on a bench directly under Albert’s tree, and frankly, he considered it a miracle Kevin hadn’t looked up yet. 

“Yeah,” Race said, grinning at their linked hands. His cheeks and ears were tinged pink. “I love this park. When I was seven, my mom, my biological one, took me and my best friend Albert here. I don’t live with her anymore, I doubt she remembers it, but I broke my arm. I don’t even remember how. I mean, that wasn’t the last time I was here, that’s the only time I’ve ever broken something. My brother says it’s a miracle I haven’t cracked my head open from all the idiot stuff I do. He shouldn’t be talking, right? He’s usually the reason I do stupid stuff. Me and him went to this park a few weeks ago. Oh, his name’s Jack, I’ve got two brothers and a sister, all adopted, our poor mom. Have you met him? He was at that party we met at, but he was probably passed out on the couch.”

Race took a breath and looked at Kevin expectantly. Albert had followed the entire conversation, more than used to Race when he started rambling, but Kevin didn’t have the same expertise. He looked like a deer in headlights, scrambling to find an endpoint to Race’s story. 

“Um… you’re a foster kid?” he finally settled on saying. “Or, um, you’re adopted?”

Albert didn’t approve. 

“Yeah,” Race said. “Adopted when I was eleven. Did I mention that? Shit, sorry, didn’t mean to unload on you.”

“Um, it’s okay, you didn’t,” Kevin said. “So… what happened with your brother?” Race raised an eyebrow, and Kevin elaborated. “A few weeks ago? When you were here with him?”“Oh!” Race said, and he launched back into his story like he’d never taken a pause. “So, we dragged a trampoline to the base of a tree, and he dared me to jump off a branch and land on the trampoline. We didn’t have a helmet so we just used a pillow. Honestly, that was one of the times where I thought I’d break somethin’ else, but it was just that one time when I was seven. I had a huge scratch on my leg for a couple weeks and I’ve got a scar, but it’s not that bad.”Kevin laughed awkwardly and tucked his hands under his thighs. It was then Albert noticed that Race had pulled their hands apart and was gesturing grandly with one. The other was resting on Kevin’s knee. Race was a tactile guy, and Albert was surprised the hand hadn’t made its way to Kevin’s face. 

“You talk a lot,” Kevin said. 

Race smiled. “Ain’t the first time someone’s told me that, trust me,” he said. “You should talk to my teachers. They’d probably go on tangents longer than mine about me. My math teacher doesn’t like me ‘cause I always get the answer right, but not the way I’m supposed to get it, which is fuckin’ unfa-”

“Let’s get ice cream,” Kevin cut in, standing up suddenly and grabbing Race’s sleeve to tug him up with him.

Race smiled sheepishly as his hand moved to grab Kevin’s again. Kevin stuffed his hands in his pockets pointedly. “Okay, cool. Sorry. Just let me know if I start rambling like that and I’m bein’ annoying. I’m kind of an idiot.”

“It’s fine,” Kevin said with a grin so fake it hurt to look at. The kid was getting a solid two out of ten on Albert’s scale of “People That Deserve To Hang Out With My Friends.”

“Hey, I don’t have my wallet with me,” Race said, patting his pockets. “But I can pay you back for the ice cream. It’d be the gentleman thing to do, right?” He winked, sidling up to Kevin’s side to lean on him, and Albert forced a laugh back down his throat. 

Kevin didn’t think it was funny. When Race’s elbow raised to rest on his shoulder, he moved away. “You didn’t bring your wallet?” he said, frowning. “But I didn’t bring mine. We agreed to get ice cream a couple days ago, when I asked you out, and you said you’d pay. Remember?”

Race’s face fell when Kevin stepped back. “Oh… oh,” he said, realization dawning over his face. “Fuckin’ shit. I’m sorry, Kevin,” he said, running a hand through his hair. Albert wanted to jump down and give him a hug, but that might have had something to do with the fact that his back was permanently cramped from hunching over in the tree for so long. 

Instead of forcing a smile and saying “It’s fine,” which Albert had been expecting, the frown didn’t waver on Kevin’s face. “What’s your problem, man?” he said. “Like, I don’t wanna be rude, but you’ve spent this entire time talking about yourself and you forgot about something we agreed on two days ago.”

“I… dude, I didn’t mean to,” Race tried. “Sorry if I’m being obnoxious. I have ADHD and I’ve been out of meds since last week. I forgot to tell my mom, but she’s picking them up today.”

If anything, Kevin’s scowl deepened, which just made the situation worse. Albert could read Race’s stiff shoulders and fleeting eyes like a book. “That’s not an excuse, dude. I get that you’ve got memory problems or whatever, but we’ve all got our issues. Can’t you just… I don’t know, try harder?” 

“I -”

“Forget it,” Kevin muttered. “I’m not really in the mood for ice cream, I think I’m just gonna go home. I’ll text you or something.” He clapped a hand on Race’s shoulder. “See you later, Tony.”

From the look on his face as he walked off, hands still stuffed deep in his pockets, Albert had a feeling he wouldn’t be texting. 

He waited until Kevin had completely disappeared around the corner. He’d pulled out his phone as soon as he left Race alone, thumps tapping wildly on the screen. Albert could only pray there wouldn’t be rumors about “the weird, freckled kid that never shuts up” at school on Monday. 

He jumped down from his tree, a lot less gracefully than he would’ve prefered. Race jumped a foot in the air and whipped around as Albert sweared loudly, clutching his foot. 

“Shit, I forgot you were up there,” Race said. His shoulders slumped, and he looked more like a kicked puppy than a dejected teenage boy. “Sorry you had to listen to all that. Like, me rambling and then gettin’ ditched by Kevin and whatever.”

“Shut up,” Albert said. Hearing himself out loud, he quickly backtracked, “I-I mean, you can talk as much as you want. I just don’t want you to… you’ve said sorry too much today, Racer. It’s not your fault.”He stared intently at the hole in the toe of his Converse as he was talking, and when he looked up, Race’s eyes were red. He wasn’t quite crying, but his voice cracked when he spoke.

“Yes it is.” It sounded like he’d tried to sound angry with himself, to snap out his words like a rubber band against raw skin, but he just sounded sad. “Don’t play dumb, Albie. Kevin’s right. I talked about myself too much, and I forgot about somethin’ so fuckin’ simple, and I chased him away. Did you see his face?” he demanded. “He looked at me like I was a fuckin’ alien from Area 51, and then he left.”

As much as Albert wanted to say “Good riddance to him, then,” he didn’t think it would be appreciated. He stepped forward, Race sunk his head into his shoulder.

“I’m such an idiot,” he said, words muffled in Albert’s shirt. “And I kind of wanted that ice cream, babe, not gonna lie.” 

Albert gripped the back of Race’s neck wordlessly, knowing the pressure was grounding and comforting from how often Race did it to him. “Lucky for you,” he mumbled in Race’s ear, “I always come prepared. C’mon, dude, my brother gave me twenty bucks and I’m spending all of it before I step foot in my house.”

Race smiled against his shoulder. “What would I do without you? Seriously, would I be dead? I think I’d be dead.”

“No, you just wouldn’t have stories to tell about breaking your arm with me to asshole dates.”

“He wasn’t an as-”

“Race. You told him you had ADHD, and he told you to try harder and get over it.”

“I should’ve told him before so he’d know how much work I can b-”“If I told someone I had autism and they told me to suck it up and stop whining, would you deck them or not?”

Race lifted his head, silently pursing his lips together. “Okay,” he admitted. “He was kind of an asshole.”

Albert nodded solemnly. “The asshole to end all assholes,” he said. He was just trying to make Race laugh and they both knew it, but in his defense, it was working. “C’mon,” he said, grabbing Race’s collar and ushering him towards the sidewalk. “Chocolate or vanilla?”“Both. Extra sprinkles.”

“Damn. You know I’m paying, right? Maybe you’re the asshole.”

Race laughed again, throwing his head back and an arm around Albert’s shoulders, and for the first time in an hour, all was right with Albert’s world. 

TAG LIST

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[gothamstodd]

Flirty

Dick Grayson x Reader

Word Count: 1.9k+

Summary: “The coldest train car. Three o'clock at dark, remember alcohol and dancing. Our friends are gone now, she chose me to take her home...” 3AM, AJR

Warnings: underage drinking, a little innuendo ;)

Author’s Note- Maybe if I keep basing my fics off of songs I’ll never have to actually come up with a summary... Any who, this was a request from @victoriavickens a while ago, go follow!! And I just got around to finishing it up! I didn’t really follow the request super well (kissing someplace you shouldn’t be), but it’s in there! Anyway, thanks so much for reading, please let me know what you think! (btw, this is set when Dick is in college, before he’s become Nightwing, sorry if there’s any confusion)

Masterlist | Ask Box | Taglist

-

Weak yellow light from the streetlights outside splayed into the entry hallway of Wayne Manor as Dick opened the door. Images and sounds from the party swirled in his head. People dancing, several different types of alcohol being offered to him- all of which he pushed away. You, stepping away from whatever drinking game or dancing partner, and walking up to him with a smile. 

“Anyway, she’s a total bitch.” You slurred as he helped you up the stoop, “And I really don’t think she’s right for her, and honestly just don’t think I wanna be around her.”

Dick wasn’t following completely, but surmised that your roommate’s girlfriend was staying over and you weren’t a fan. As much as he sympathized, he wasn’t entirely sure he’d made the right choice in bringing you back to the Manor now that he heard your shoes clacking on the hardwood and how loudly you talked.

He shushed you gently and pulled you down a hallway.

You’d asked him to take you home from the party, you were drunk. You stumbled over to him, and caught him just before he slipped out the door of the frat house. You gripped his wrist gently and looked at him with wide, pleading eyes. It didn’t take that much to convince him. 

While he walked you down the sidewalk, you went on to tell him you couldn’t go back to your dorm and without skipping a beat or waiting for an explanation, he offered to let you stay in his room at the manor. He’d sleep on the couch and sneak you out in the morning. You accepted, and continued the story once you had sat down together on the bench of a cold grimy subway car.

To be honest, he didn’t listen as much as he should have in that subway car at 3 AM. You had your head on his shoulder as you talked, and you pulled him close because he was warm and the bench was frigid. All he could manage to focus on was the way it felt with you so close, and how scared he was that the moment you woke up the next morning you would feel nothing like how you did then.

“Oooh, Grayson!” You sang as he began to help you up the long stairs of the manor. He turned around and held up a finger to signal you to be quiet but your proximity meant his finger met your lips instead of the air.

“Are you taking me to your bedroom?” You whispered suggestively against his skin, not bothering to think twice about it.

“I guess,” His cheeks flushed, “Don’t read too much into it.”

You grinned at him, but he looked away, taking you the rest of the way up the stairs and down the next hallway.

You yanked on his arm and brought him to a stop next one of the many doors that lined the walls. “What?” He whispered harshly.

You looked at him through your lashes, your hands wandering to intertwine with his fingers. “What’s the rush, Dick?” He could smell the alcohol on your breath as you leaned in. 

He flattened himself against the wall, but you persisted. “I just wanna kiss you.”

He could feel his cheeks heating up again. There was no way you meant that. No way you wouldn’t regret it in the morning. There was no way your pulse beat against your skin when you looked at him as quickly as his did when he looked at you. “Listen Y/N I really don’t think we should-”

“I like you, Grayson.”

There was no way you meant that. No way you wouldn’t regret it in the morning. He tried to ignore your words, though his palms felt damp with nervous sweat, and his heart raced when he looked into your wide-blown pupils. “You’re drunk, and I don’t want to take advantage-”

You interrupted by kissing him, and he found himself kissing back.

For just a fraction of a second he let himself enjoy your touch, the warm tingle that seemed to radiate from where your lips pressed to his, from each meeting of your fingers with his, from the spot where your hips pushed gently toward him. He shoved you away, scolding himself for not doing it sooner.

He pulled you quickly away from the door, it was Bruce’s- not that you gave him a chance to warn you. But he probably wasn’t even there... right?

Dick pushed open his own bedroom door and pushed you gently inside.

“That wasn’t so bad, was it?” You asked.

“What?” He ran a hand through his hair, his skin still warm with the blood that rushed to his face.

“That kiss.” You prompted, “That was a good kiss.”

You were right, but he wasn’t going to admit that, “You’re drunk.”

“Rude.” You snarked, “Hey can I borrow something to wear? This is so uncomfortable.” You gestured to what you had worn to the party, your tone shifting drastically.

“Sure.” He pulled a shirt and sweatpants from his drawer and tossed it to you.

“Hey thanks.” You smiled, plopping down on his bed. “Ooh comfy!” You remarked.

He chuckled, “I’m gonna go change.” He nodded toward the door. “Make yourself comfortable.”

“You can change right here, pretty boy.” You teased.

“Nice one.” He replied sarcastically as he slipped out the door, and by the time he came back, you were knocked out under his covers.

His eyes drifted to your face, peaceful as you slept and lacking the excitement you’d had when he looked at you moments before.

It was good. He told himself. Good, that you weren’t looking at him with misdirected lust anymore. That you weren’t meeting his eyes with false admiration.  

He curled up in the arm chair in the corner of the room, sinking into the cushions. His frame was still thin and agile, and it wasn’t much different from the spot on the floor he’d chosen when he was younger and refused to sleep in a new bed. Though it was a bit softer.

He fell asleep to thoughts of you, convincing himself as the minutes passed that he couldn’t build up hope, and that there was no way you’d like him in the morning. No way you’d like him the way that he liked you.

-

Only a few hours later, sunshine streaming through the window brought a low groan to your lips. You opened your eyes to find a glass of water and container of Advil already on the table next to you. A headache pounded against your skull and nausea bubbled up through your stomach.

“Good morning.” Dick’s voice sounded from somewhere else in the room. 

You shushed him and rolled over after downing a couple capsules of the Advil and half the water. Memories from the previous night were already rolling in.

You inhaled sharply. You kissed him. How could you kiss him? “Oh god I’m so sorry for everything I did and said last night, you can go ahead and completely forget I exist.” You groaned, hands quickly covering your flushed face.

A sharp stab of disappointment radiated through Dick’s abdomen. He’d been right, you regretted everything, you meant none of it.

He forced laughter, “Don’t worry about it.” You glanced up to see him digging through his dresser drawers- presumably for a shirt, since he didn’t have one on. 

You bit down on your lip, looking him up and down. Well, that’s one way to wake up in the morning. You clambered out of his bed, still unable to tear your eyes away from him. ”I uh- I can’t thank you enough.”

He looked over his shoulder at you, now holding a t-shirt he’d picked out for himself. “It’s no problem.” He shrugged, turning back and rubbing at his sore neck.

“Oh my god, you didn’t sleep on the floor did you?” You asked.

“No.” He pulled the shirt over his head, “I slept in that chair.” He nodded toward the armchair in the corner of the room.

“I’m buying you a massage envy gift card there’s no way you were comfortable.” You replied quickly.

“It’s really no problem.” He laughed. “I’m flexible.” 

His eyes went wide immediately, blood rushing to his cheeks, “That wasn’t supposed to mean anything, I-”

“It’s okay.” You giggled. “I thought you only got flustered when I was drunk and trying desperately to get in your pants.” A smirk played on your lips as you looked at him.

“And I thought you only got flirty when you were drunk and trying desperately to get in my pants.” He shot back.

“Thank you for not taking me up on that, by the way.” Your tone went more serious as you looked toward the carpet, “A lot of guys would’ve jumped at the chance to get with a flirty drunk but you didn’t.”

“Well,” He shrugged, “‘A lot of guys need to learn how to be decent human beings.”

You smiled at him, eyes wandering over his face. “That said,” You inhaled, “You should’ve shared the bed with me, at least.”

“I was fine.” He assured you, “I’ve slept in a lot less comfortable places.”

You looked at him quizzically. “Crazy childhood.” He brushed you off. “And I didn’t want you to be uncomfortable.”

“You’re too sweet for your own good, Grayson.” You rolled your eyes at him. “Can I give this back to you on Monday?” You gestured to the clothes you wore, forcing yourself to look away from his eyes. “I’ll wash them for you.”

Your eyes drifted over to his open drawer, something bright red and yellow catching your eye. “What’s th-”

He interrupted you quickly, “Sure. Yeah. Monday is great.” He lead you out of his room quickly. As you walked down the hallway, both your eyes lingered on the space on the wall where you had kissed.

After making down the stairs and through yet another hallway, you stepped out the large wooden doors of the manner.

“Wow, Dick.” You said sarcastically, “You are a master at sneaking classmates out of your parent’s house.”

He laughed, “He never expects me to go out the front door.”

“Listen.” Your tone changed, and he met your eyes. “I know I came on really strong, but as crazy drunk as I was, I meant some of what I said last night.”

He raised his eyebrows, not wanting to jump to conclusions. His palms were sweating again, and his heart was pounding into his chest, his reflexes doing quite the opposite of ‘not jumping to conclusions’.

“I like you, Dick.” You said. “And if you’re up for it, I’d really like to go out with you sometime.”

He grinned, “I’d love that.” A breath of relief left his lungs.

“Great.” You smiled back at him. “I guess I’ll see you in class then.”

“See you then.” He replied, still shocked. He watched you leave, making sure you got past the gate safely and checked your bag to see that you had everything you came with, a smile stuck on his face.

Finally turning away, he managed to make it up to his bedroom and back down the stairs to the kitchen just in time to meet Bruce and Alfred at the table for coffee.

“Your guest didn’t want to stay for breakfast?” Bruce asked, sipping his coffee. He barely seemed to look up from the table, his tone as deadpan as always.

Dick’s eyes widened, nearly choking on orange juice. “My guest?”

“Oooh, Grayson!” Alfred imitated from next to them and Bruce’s lips curved into a rare smile.

Dick’s face flushed, “I slept in the chair, they couldn’t go back to their dorm, I’m sor-”

“It’s fine, Dick.” Bruce interrupted. “Just drink responsibly next time.” The smile on his face grew.

Dick winced, “I didn’t even drink, they were the irresponsible one-”

“Relax.” Bruce let out a laugh, “I don’t mind. Though we could use a heads up next time.”

-

I would love to hear what you thought of this!

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[marauders70s]

So I just watched Crimes of Grindelwald and I have a huge rant list.

Spoilers (obviously). 

Also, I did not like hardly any of it, so I’m sorry. Don’t pick a fight with me after reading a post entitled rant list and then be upset that they are all rants.

- wow AMERICA yeah jo we know what you think of us. it’s obvious in our de-tonguing geneva-convention violating (i know it’s not around in 1927 okay) inhumane treatment of not just grindelwald but apparently all the prisoners and animals we keep in cages (i know our prison system is inherently terrible i’m very aware) but to transport him like a paralyzed stroke victim drooling to a thestral carriage on a Dark And Stormy Night really just is lazy writing on why we should dislike aurors without giving anyone a plot, dialogue, or exposition

- this guy who has been posing as Grindelwald....since the beginning? since when? they cut out his tongue?? but then? it’s just forked? there’s magic? like? could they grow the tongue back?? they can regrow bones in harry’s arm but okay

- this thestral carriage chase scene is really CGI explosion heavy turned actioned film and mostly consisted of me being like what. what. WHAT. wait what. wait who is that. what. why wouldn’t he just disapparate. what happens to these thestrals. okay. what. grindelwald can just dissolve wands since when can people do that why didn’t voldemort do that why didn’t harry do that this presents problems

- okay look david yates and co. you had this incredible opportunity to create an entire wardrobe of WIZARD FASHION in THREE COUNTRIES, most notably the fashion capitol of the world and what did you do you put every single person in trench coats and random muggle garb. Also, not even cool wizard hats. No. Just muggle bowlers and mobster hats.

- Does Newt have a job. If so, what is it? How can he pay for this lovely house with magical modifications? Don’t you have to get a contractor to put that in? Did he do it himself? How does he pay Sad Girl In Love With Protagonist tm? Does he pay her? How did they meet? Why do we never see her again?

- For a movie entitled ‘Fantastic Beasts’ we really gloss over looking at any of the in-house beasts, learning anything about them, or doing anything except a CGI palooza.

- Wow Queenie and Jacob are here ‘hope you don’t mind we let ourselves in’ ah yes rude american trope again. who on earth would do that. also this entire time jacob acts like a goon and newt is like let’s take the enchantment off and i’m like hi that’s hella nonconsensual you’re basically raping and kidnapping him and jacob is somehow okay with this. newt is somehow okay with this. 

- ‘please don’t read my mind’ um dude you’re talking AT her??? 

- movie glosses over how jacob got his memories back with a throwaway line of unbelievable dialogue. If obliviate only worked on bad memories, Hermione Granger really needs to go to family counseling with her parents. 

- mysterious postcard is exposition over really dumb journalism error that could have been easily fixed within seconds by sending an owl because owls don’t need addresses, something queenie conveniently forgets by not knowing how to find her sister

- queenie is a Dumb American for cheap laughs by letting a woman say something in french, laughing, and saying she doesn’t understand anything only for the droll French woman to repeat it in the exact monosyllabic voice. Apparently everyone entering/leaving a country needs to register a visa or something, which is conveniently circumvented by going through a muggle port? It’s unclear. Queenie herself does not seem to have registered.

- French Ministry of Magic is gorgeous. Has a cool roots to iron elevator. It is also probably improperly named as they put ‘American Ministry of Magic’ despite America not having ministries or ministers outside of some serious religious stuff. They put all this effort into creating MACUSA but didn’t use it.

- Is it just me or does the MoM change the interior every time I see it.

- Queenie is devastated she can’t find her sister in a city of millions despite having magic, a means of communication that is foolproof, and enough money to find a hotel and wait to meet up. Queenie is overwhelmed that other people think in their native language. Instead of finding this helpful for tuning out a crowded city (like she does on the daily in New York), she somehow finds it overwhelming even looking for Newt/Jacob. 

- Random woman is Silence In Queenie’s Head. I literally never learned who she was except Hard Bitch Kills Toddler. Or why Queenie can’t hear her thoughts. (Plot twist she’s Bella Swan).

- Toddler didn’t get his own little casket in the French mourning cart. Nice of Grindelwald to give a supposedly muggle family a funeral cart when he could have transfigured their bodies into armchairs or something. (Muggle supposed after he makes the remark about a ‘thorough cleaning.’)

- No one in Paris uses French in spellcasting. Spells are still English-based. 

- Dumbledore is a dramatic bitch for gloves and rooftops. It’s a very specific brand of Gay. 

- Don’t kill me but I don’t...hate? Jude Law as Dumbledore. He was still kind. But he wasn’t auburn and that was dumb. 

- Unclear why Jacob and Queenie have to live in shame and secret when they could move to another country especially when Jacob loves bread and would like Paris. This seems to be Queenie’s motivator which is thin as hell and I didn’t follow her ‘logic’ at all. LAZY WRITING.

- Queenie immediately doesn’t disapparate upon seeing Grindelwald. Queenie somehow gets into this rhetoric. Later Queenie does not get disgusted with apropos wizard-Hitler being like ‘they are lesser beings’ and she, who wants to marry one, is like ‘yeah they totally are because I’m basically Jacob’s mom.’ 

- Grindelwald, in addition to being played by Johnny Depp, is albino, has one mutilated eye with a bad color contact clearly visible in multiple scenes, and is British when it is specifically stated he went to Durmstrang and was expelled for Dark Magic (at Durmstrang, which is noted for its Dark Arts program). As an allusion to wizard-Hitler, I always inferred that Grindelwald was German or Austrian. 

- Wow Paris street magic carnival gave me LIFE and WOW and MAGIC feels. I loved the ducking through the barrier. 

- Weird freakshow circus gets blown apart but Newt only manages to catch one creature that is helpfully foreshadowed it can leap Paris in a single bound. It is a Chinese creature when no mention of Chinese magic, Chinese handlers, or any sort of Asian magic is referred to (except in the cringe-worthy case of the ‘South Asian blood curse of Nagini’ which is a whole other can of worms). In all likelihood, as China is one of the oldest civilizations, their magic and dragon worship would be more paramount. China cat’s serious Great Beast’s weakness is a cat toy. 

- Why is Nicholas Flamel....like that. Sure he’s like 600 years old but (a) is Jacob literally breaking his hand what the hell, (b) as much money and life as you could want does that mean he has to be like 100 years old forever that sucks that’s not even worth being immortal. (c) Where’s his wife. (d) When he goes to battle I thought he’d drink some elixir and be young again but...no.

- Nagini has no purpose in this movie other than to be snake slave and love interest and run around in a circus outfit with tits out bra off. She did not do a single useful thing.

- Wait I’m sorry WHAT you can like...fuck house elves now?? There are half-elves? How....you know what no thanks I don’t want to know.

- Credence, despite the last movie setting up an obscurial as like a suicide bomb, can relatively control mega destruction now and get back into his body fairly easily. No one even wonders why this lacemakers roof apartment exploded.

- Are he and Nagini in love? Are they escaped carnival freak bros? Why isn’t Nagini heading for the hills? She literally has no personality of her own at all.

- Paris is suspiciously white in this film. Especially for the 20s art renaissance. 

- I don’t know why Credence falls into Orphan Must Know Parentage Trope because it’s really overused and boring. And frankly the superfluity of ravens was really beating me over the head. Credence can like...do anything. He could get some money and go to a wand shop. He could just...disappear. I don’t know why he has to be so easy to track.

- By the way who is this weirdo tracking him for Grindelwald/the ministry. It’s very unclear. I never got his name. It’s probably one of the many death eater names they throw in to make sure you know these families great-grandparents are also running around being evil instead of, you know, regular people doing it. So he could be Travers. I guess. LAZY WRITING. 

= Now is a special segment on Hogwarts = 

- The layout of Hogwarts changes every time I see it. Why are the classrooms always different. Why would the wood still have carvings. Why is there a bridge over this lake which is different than the covered bridge leading towards the Forest that Harry and Lupin have a Serious Chat on. 

- YOU CANNOT APPARATE IN HOGWARTS GROUNDS. And don’t you try to tell me Dumbledore instituted that because it’s directly stated in Bathilda Bagshot’s Hogwarts, A History as being a longstanding charm with muggle repelling. 

- Everyone apparates onto the bridge and walks through the castle without anyone bothering them into the correct classroom right away?? Like did they get a copy of the teaching schedule? Did Peeves show them?

- Dumbledore did NOT teach DADA. Dumbledore taught transfiguration. He was still teaching Transfiguration when Tom Riddle went to school. So if Dumbledore is teaching Transfiguration, Minerva McGonagall would not be at Hogwarts because she taught transfiguration after Dumbledore. Pretty sure mcgonagall was too young in 1927 to be a professor. LAZY WRITING. 

- Just looked it up. Pottermore (official JK writing, btw) states that Minerva McGonagall was born in 1934. So she’s officially negative 7 years old and a professor. That’s GOT to be a record. Poor Rowan Khanna will never beat preconception tenure.

- Despite me being ecstatic to hear/see a young McGonagall, the camera never held still long enough for me to see a young McGonagall. Any far away shots only demonstrated despite this being 1920s, she was still dressing in the 1890s. McGonagall, despite the obvious laughs it was going for, would never use magic against a student.

- Haha this dumb neanderthal student is Grandpa McClaggen. 

- Dumbledore, being known for wearing really flamboyant robes, dresses in conservative three piece suit. 

- Why would you not go home for the holidays when you have to take care of a baby raven you can just put it in a box or your pocket for christ’s sake you’re carrying like 6 niffler babies at one time but you never even show them again

- Will say that young Newt’s casting is A++

- WHY ARE THE UNIFORMS NAVY BLUE. WHY DO THEY WEAR RED TARTAN SKIRTS. WHY DO THEY HAVE PHD EMBELLISHMENTS ON ACADEMIC REGALIA? Why do they have colored hoods when the original films (and books to boot) say all black robes. Why are these robes not even proper wizarding robes but just like...cambridge robes. 

- To be honest this boggart lesson is like?? insane?? how did it last for 70 years it’s honestly so unethical and cruel. I’ve ALWAYS thought this even reading it for the first time in POA I was like “people’s worst fears are spiders and mummies?” like my greatest fear even at 12 was people I love dying. The fact that Newt is more scared of a desk than Theseus dying is weird.

- “I don’t want to talk about my boggart” Leta LeStrange means there was an Incident where Dumbledore realized that some students don’t have Great Home Lives and yet persists in this lesson for the next 70 years knowing that multiple kids are going to have their parents abusing them as their greatest fear. 

- Corvus, as a name, just means Raven. How stupid. “Is your house crest a raven?” “Yes. Also my brother. Like if you were named Badger McHufflepuff.” “Oh don’t worry my name is just Lizard Lizard.” “Cool."

- No background or even hints at future background (e.g. they haven’t written it yet) on why Leta gets with Theseus even after the first film where he has a picture of Leta in his suitcase. 

- Theseus and Newt have no screen time interaction. They do not behave like brothers. They have no flashbacks. Even young Newt never interacts with his brother. There is no realism here that Newt says they have a complicated relationship or is annoyed by his brother. This exposition is just lazy writing with nothing on screen to back it up. 

- So you’re telling me Dumbledore had the mirror of erised for SEVENTY YEARS and yells at harry for looking in it for three nights. How did Dumbledore not go mad? Where did he get it? I feel like 70 years is a long time to have it. 

- I guess when you think about it yeah being 40 in the 1920s does put you on the mark to be 110 when Harry meets you but fuck the books did NOT explain HOW OLD Dumbledore was to me I always thought he was like hale and sprightly 70s/80s

- Okay so you’re looking in the mirror and going to just BRAZENLY FLOUT CANON and say his deepest desire looking in the mirror is to relive the memory of the blood oath? That’s exposition. That’s a memory. That’s a pensieve not a mirror. Your greatest desire has ALWAYS BEEN saving Ariana. And even if it was loving Grindelwald this is your GREATEST DESIRE like being together not reliving a blood oath just for the sake of audience explanation. LAZY WRITING. 

------ Back to other rants

- Most of this movie was me squinting being like ‘what’s the plot??’ and if there was a whiff of plot (”we all have to find credence’s birth records!”) most of it was me being confused “why does this matter?” “how did they all get there?”

- The confession of Newt trying to talk to Tina in the records room was painful. Not cute. Not even funny. Just so painful. It was like secondhand embarrassment but like...pity embarrassment. 

- I don’t know why Grindelwald has a map of a Parisian cemetery. I don’t know why he had to give it to Credence except as a big reveal. I don’t remember how Queenie got there. I genuinely DO NOT understand how Jacob got there much less passed through to the secret wizard place as a muggle. 

- No idea why the records lady was attacking them when Leta checked in twice (once as Tina). NO CLUE why they were the worst animated cats of all time or why they became multiple cats or even why when taken out of the French records they became even worse animated ‘real’ cats when they could have just used real cats. The entire chase scene was baffling and unnecessary. The records lady was not an agent of Grindelwald so no idea what’s up with her bee in the bonnet sorry for wrecking all your shit bye.

- I saw this movie less than an hour ago. I’m still confused how Leta, Newt, and Tina all teamed up or why they were cool teaming up or what. 

- This mausoleum has a Greek hellenistic statue of a man reclining for no apparent reason and these shelves are supposed to bear ashes right so why are you putting a dumb pop up book there. Why would Grindelwald’s agent remove the record in drag as an old lady? It was weirdly unnecessary. 

- Yosef’s exposition on how a white man literally imperiused and raped his mother was like WOW NO ONE IS GONNA EVEN TOUCH THAT???? and then for her to die in childbirth it’s like...my dudes wizards have cured so many diseases muggles haven’t you know they’re up there inventing the c-section with Julius Caesar and accio’ing babies out of utero like ‘gimme that catcher’s mitt she’s fully dilated.’ This whole “oh it was the 1900s” nonsense does NOT apply to magic. LAZY WRITING. 

- I immediately forgot what happened to Corvus’ mom. but whatever right? she’s just a disposable woman! this movie does NOT care about consent! much less women! haha they’re just flowers!

- ‘I killed my brother’ yeah i mean we saw that coming she was REALLY SURE he was dead. But I was 90% sure it was going to be a child accident like dropping him down the stairs or shaking him too hard to get him to stop crying and then swapping him with a live baby but no? so i don’t know i feel like you didn’t really kill him.

- this steamer going down is confusing. is it a muggle ship? if it’s a muggle ship than is Credence swapped a baby with...a muggle born wizard? Are their other wizarding families on the ship? If so then why did they drown? you can all magic out of there? your lifeboat wouldn’t go down? why even take a steamer ship to america? you can...apparate or portkey or floo or fly like this titanic nonsense makes NO SENSE. And if Papa LeStrange hates muggles so much why put his only children on an all muggle ship with a half elf (again why) who can’t do magic to protect them

- Finding Credence’s identity REALLY doesn’t need to revolve around the LeStrange’s sordid past. Steamer ships keep passenger logs. So. We really should leave the mausoleum now to go find that. 

- Yosef took an unbreakable vow to kill this white baby and it’s dead so is he released? He was released like...20 years ago. Why does he continue to hang out with these people? Your endless vengeance has rested? No need to team up with the sister you never knew? apparently (their family dynamic was also poorly/not explained). 

- Why is this mausoleum an underground amphitheater. Literally why it makes no sense. Is it supposed to bring up the first David Yates film OotP? I don’t know. It also has a lot of blue fire and people rapturing the fuck out of there (literally when did apparating involve staring up at the sky and blasting off in rocket smoke). Also in re this movie how can you be tracked after apparating (Newt/Dumbledore’s tail). 

- So if you touch this curtain do you automatically teleport to this amphitheater. Also what if you touched it by accident and were like OH SHIT HOW DO I GET OUT. Like wow this guy wasn’t kidding when he said there’s no wizard that can match him magically. This is like Charles Xavier Magneto Level 1 Mutant Power kind of shit. Not even Voldemort could do that. Big Power Too Big trope. Again. How did Jacob even GET there. 

- Johnny Depp wears leather pants. Costume department, get your act together.

- Grindelwald, continuing to be British, shows clips of the Great War, approx 1914-1918. While the tanks and biplanes were appropriate, there were also lines (assumingly?) to concentration camps and the nuclear bomb of Hiroshima, which wouldn’t take place until 1945. So is Grindelwald also a prophet? Is he a seer? They kept referencing this book of poems and prophecy but without letting us see it? it went along with my general ‘I’m getting the gist of this but not really the why because it doesn’t make sense.’ And then Grindelwald rumor mongers and uses fear tactics when one of the police aurors straight up KILLS A WOMAN like wow can we cool it with use of force/police brutality is this guy going to get written up or is he fire now? 

- Ethnically ambiguous Grindelwald supporter (only person of color) gets immediately incinerated for not being 100% sure of his side. When Credence feels the same way, he gets a couple of gifts. 

- Look, I didn’t start this way but I stan Leta LeStrange. She was honestly one of the only people and the only woman in this film with a personality. 

- Queenie stands still as weak, silly, expositional, dumb American. For those of you about to be like ‘She’s spying on Grindelwald! She’s the greatest legilimens that ever lived!’ I just want to beg you to reconsider because if you’re right and if the writers get wind of that you know they’re going to have her like teach little Tom Riddle something just BECAUSE everything has to connect. 

- Poor Jacob he seems okay with being stranded in another country. Is his bakery okay? Do his friends know he isn’t dead? He is super super super brave throughout this movie despite his main comedic strength in the other movie being nervous. But this time he’s like meh firefights and large monsters.

- Credence I understand going over. Nagini continues to not be a character and did not go with Newt and Crew. 

- Wasn’t even sad for Theseus because again, Theseus had little to no character development except being a Whipping Boy to authority. Theseus and Leta never interacted in any meaningful way. Their relationship didn’t even seem real. I wasn’t even sad.

- I feel like Leta isn’t dead though because who the fuck else is carrying this LeStrange line to give birth to Rabastan and Rodolphus. 

- At this point everyone apparates AGAIN to Hogwarts. This time I guess a ghost went and alerted Dumbledore because he’s waiting. But yeah like come on in for tea Newt but fuck all those kids they can wait here. 

- What is this plot?? Is there a plot?? What is going on??

- Who gives someone a wand like this hi I hid it up my sleeve touch me my boy I long for your touch.

- This is a phoenix, not a Raven. Newt is a sad ordinary bird but you’re a bright beautiful phoenix. Apparently phoenixes can grow up in ONE DAY. Foreshadowing Dumbledore is foreshadowing. LAZY WRITING this is so stupid. The books would have been EXPLICIT about a fourth child. 

- Maybe he’s a cousin. Close relative, perhaps? *Pleakley voice*

“He hasn’t got a brother?” 

Dobby shook his head. 

Literally where I’m at right now. 

- ABRUPT ENDING IS ABRUPT I didn’t even realize this was the end of the film because the score, cinematography, and writing did NOT cue me that this was winding down. I literally was like ‘how long does this last’ and then it was like DAVID YATES. Okayyyyyyy. 

- Anyway my sum feeling upon the lights going on was: what the fuck. was there a plot. there were so many loopholes. i was confused about many things almost the whole time because nothing was fleshed out and if they threw enough CGI at me I’d be patched up. 

Final rating: It matches up pretty well to the middle film of The Hobbit trilogy.