#this is about being actively disapproving or mean to people who do ship them with other characters

[rookflower]

i do absolutely understand why people are so opposed to mousefur ships (and hollyleaf ships cause i've seen the same sentiment for her occasionally), i know the state of ace and aro representation in media sucks shit and crumbs of subtext or external authorial confirmations can still be worthwhile crumbs to some people. i definitely see mousefur as aro/ace myself! but also i think acting like putting these characters in ships (especially wlw ships which is the context most of the time) is immoral in some way is pretty reductive and misplaced ire. the representation at stake is so incredibly vague and obscure and more so representation within the fandom than anything taking place within the actual series. there isn't really any representation being robbed because the representation that does exist is admittedly... basically nothing. also warrior cats is so heteronormative that the concept of a cat "taking a mate" is, in its underlying intent, referring to a heterosexual relationship. from what i remember in the hollyleaf situation especially, her claiming she doesn't want a mate is in a scene where she is moreso rejecting motherhood and heteronormativity (in a way which is intended to characterise her as ambitious, and the way the erins often imply ambitious women (and queerness) as the opposite of ""good parenthood"" is its own problem) there are definitely other queer readings you can apply there.

[rainplaysswtor]

SWTOR: New Player Combat/Survival Tips

If you're familiar with SWTOR, these are things you probably know backward and forward. Think back, though: when you first downloaded and started playing, were they all so obvious - particularly if you didn't play similar games/MMOs before? Here are ten things I wish I'd known when I started playing SWTOR. If you're a newbie, hopefully they will help you too. 1. Take a picture of your abilities bar. 

There are several bugs in various areas that will inadvertently unlock your abilities bar, sending your carefully arranged abilities scattering in all directions. You may accidentally unlock the bar yourself, or forget to lock it again after adjusting something. 

Take a photo of your characters' abilty bars. Use the screenshot function in the game. Use CTRL+Print Screen on a PC. Take a photo of the screen with your phone. Whatever works. That way, if a character's abilities go floating, you will have a reference guide to put everything back in its proper place. 

2. Kill the healers first. 

In a lot of fights, there will be medics or other NPCs who heal their colleagues as you're fighting. Needless to say this can complicate your fights. 

Sometimes the medics really will have nameplates that say 'medic.' Other times they won't. You have to learn to pick them out of the crowd. They usually hang toward the back of the mob, as opposed to the other NPCs who will charge at you. They are also often weaker and don't have gold or silver tags. You may spot them fiddling with a scanner device in their hand or casting Force healing toward whoever you're fighting. Look at what your own healer companions do, and learn to recognize it - and then take out the healers first. 

3. Learn what your interrupts are. 

Every character is given at least one 'interrupt.' This is an ability that, as the name would suggest, can interrupt a cast or an action being taken by an enemy NPC. If you use this skill, you stop the enemy from doing whatever it is trying to do to you. 

How do you find out what your interrupt skill is? Click P. Now click on the first entry, and scroll down the list to browse your abilities. Click the second and do the same. If you mouse over each ability, you will get a text box that tells you what they do. 

Every class and advanced class has their own interrupt(s), and the icons often have different meanings with different classes - so do read the descriptions.

Once you have found your interrupt, make sure it's on your ability bar. How? Unlock your ability bar with the small padlock on the left. Put your cursor over the skill you want (you can only do this with abilities that are NOT marked as "passive"). Put the skill on the ability bar. Lock it by clicking the padlock again. 

I tend to keep my interrupts and stun breakers on the far right side of the bar so I always know where they are immediately. 

4. Learn what your stun breakers/cleanses are. 

Every character also has at least one 'stun breaker.' This is an ability that will break a hold that an enemy NPC has on you or cleanse a negative effect they've given you. you want to know what this is and have it on your abilities bar ready to go. 

How do you find your stun breaker (s)? See above. 

5. Learn what your stuns are. 

As the name would suggest, these are skills that momentarily stun or incapacitate an enemy so they stop fighting you. If you're having trouble in a fight, stunning them for a second can help you take a breather. 

Find them and put them on your ability bar by following the instructions above. 

6. Know if your character has heals, and what they are. 

Some advanced classes, notably Marauders, really don't have any good ways to heal themselves in battle. Others, like Sage and Mercenaries, have a lot of heals for themselves and others. Find them. Add them to your abilities bar. 

For the characters that have a lot of heals, like Sorcerers, Scoundrels and Operatives, I find that it helps to keep them all in one place - in my case, on the left hand abilities side bar. 

7. Use your Heroic Moment. 

Heroic Moment is a special set of abilities you can call upon. You can get eight of them in total. They are awarded when you finish each class story for the first time. They include an orbital strike, a kick, Force lightning, and more. You will also be slowly healed for the entire two minutes the Heroic Moment is active. The abilities will appear in a special bar above your regular abilities bar - use them as you will. 

If you're having trouble in a fight or fighting a boss, do not feel shy about calling on your Heroic Moment. You can only use it once every five minutes. If you have a boss fight coming up, don't feel bad about hanging back for a moment to let it cool down. 

8. Repair your gear whenever you can. 

Your weapons and other gear get damaged as you fight. As it wears down, it's less effective at both offense and defense, and your fights will become more difficult and longer. Repair it whenever you can. You will know if you need to repair your gear if the "repair all" button is lit up when you are interacting with a vendor. Invest in the Legacy repair perks, which allow you to summon a field repair droid. Buy the Legacy perk which places a repair droid on your ship. As you are out and about, remember just about any vendor can repair your gear, not just the ones marked as medical droids.

8. Make friends with at least one companion. 

Your companions can be set to heal, tank or go on the offense (damage). The higher your influence is, the more effective they will be at any role. IMHO it's really worth it to work on getting at least one favored companion to influence level 50. Or as high as you can. 

You can raise your companions' influence by giving them gifts they like, getting approval (or even disapproval) from them in conversations and cut scene choices, and sending them on crew skills missions. There are two Legacy perks - Legacy of Altruism and Legacy of Persuasion - that will raise the amount of influence you get from conversations and gifts. IMHO they are worth buying. 

8. a. Use Presence stims

Let's say you have a required companion for some content - something that annoyingly happens more and more. Let's say your influence with that companion is low. Buy a Command/Presence stim from the nearest medical droid. They're usually pink. These stims raise your presence level so your companion(s) will temporarily be more effective. 

9. Get some datacrons

Datacrons are little magical cubes that you can find here and there on SWTOR's many planets, moons, and even the Fleets. Each datacron will permanently bump up your Mastery, Endurance or Presence stats slightly for all your characters and give you some XP and a lore entry, and those things are always helpful.

If you've read the guides for the datacrons you might be intimidated. It's true that some of them are so hard to get that you may spend hours trying. When I started playing SWTOR I didn't even try to get the datacrons because I was intimidated.

However, some of them are so easy to get that you literally just walk up to them. No jumping, no grouping up, no fancy tricks. Thus even if you do not have the desire to go on an ambitious datacron hunt, do try to get the ones that you can stroll over to or access easily.

10. Change your camera angle. 

If you look at videos of SWTOR gameplay you will notice that people play from a variety of angles. Some are close to their characters, some are not. Different fights and area of the game may call for different angles. Play around and figure out what works best for you. Sometimes the right camera angle can help you see something that's making a fight tough and show you how to resolve it. 

[kirric-the-fan]

Pirate au Character focus: Pepa Madrigal

- Captain of the Casita, and leader of the Madrigals.

- Has more control over her powers than her canon counterpart. More doesn't mean perfect control, but she can direct large swathes of weather when she's concentrating, and push away small clouds without having to rely on 'clear skies'. This is mostly due to having more cause to utilise her powers instead of being stuck with them, and as such Pepa's confidence is much greater too.

- Pepa had always been favoured by Alma. Having control of the weather with a ship based life was hugely powerful, and Alma ensured Pepa was always learning the most about running a ship (starting on how not to damage the ship with her storms). Pepa in her own right has also always been a mama's child, staying closer to her than the other two, which made the breaking of their relationship even more hard for them. Pepa may not have been the older sibling, but she was always the one primed for captaincy (it was decided Julieta's gift was far to useful to risk her as much. also she would have much less time to devote to ships business with the need to cook as well. Bruno was considered lazy (more chilled out/introverted and needed more rest than the others due to his visions), and showed no interest in leading)

- Pepa took over as captain from her ma whilst in her twenties, leading the other two in stealing the casita away when Alma retired. Everyone knows that story, and that the command of the ship changed, but there is obvious and continued bad blood between Alma and her daughter. Their present relationship is strained, or nonexistent. Most people can tell that something serious went down between them, but no-one knows exactly what, and the triplets remain tight-lipped about the details. There are some rumors that Alma disapproved of her daughter's relationship with a merman, but it's hard to judge that aspect of it because Pepa's (and thus Felix's) physical and emotional distance doesn't help with building a familiarity or rapport (these are mostly rumors).

- Pepa is fiercely protective of her family, almost to a fault. Numerous incidents have drawn Pepa to keeping her family close, almost leaving them stuck on the ship with her. Not everybody is happy with that, but they have all been instilled with a strong sense of duty and obligation to stay and use their gifts to help. There is also a little bit of fear in the mix, because even though she wouldn't deliberately terrorise her family, Pepa is a pretty scary and terrifying person at times. She will certainly give no quarter in dealing with those who mean her family harm, and has gained a fearsome reputation for that in addition to her prowess on the seas. She may have lightning and weather on her side, but she also prefers to get 'hands on' at times. A punch can convey a lot more than an otherwise random bolt of lightning.

- Pepa is smart, and cunning in her own right in planning how to protect and bolster the Casita's resources so they can all have the most comfortable life. She also knows how to utilise her families gifts and natural abilities- she draws her brother into planning routes and charting weather courses not just because of his access to visions, but because he can understand the weather interactions better than her. But the pressures of running the ship have pushed Pepa to almost reducing her family to their gifts and what they can do for the ship. She is often blind to their own needs and desires, too focused on preserving what they have. (Pepa is the equivalent of canon Abuela in this au)

- Pepa loves all of the family, but is biased towards favouring her own side of the family, and her closer family members, even though it's more of a subconscious thing than an active attempt to elevate them. It'd be small things, like prompting Julieta to take one of her own daughters with her on a mission, even though Dolores would be the best choice. Pepa is very good at finding reasons to justify her choices like that, but the end effect is the cool colours getting more work, and the warm colours kids getting more bored/at a loose end. Agustín, Mirabel, and, surprisingly, Dolores are all very aware of this discrepancy in treatment. Isabela knows it too, but only in the context of having to keep up with Dolores, who has to do a lot less to get the same sort of attention and praise. On all fronts, Pepa is too embedded in her ways to address this behaviour, so they put up with it.

- Pepa is still firmly entwined with her emotions, has her canon counterpart's love of music and dancing, (and Félix). She also loves sailing, and being out on the sea, and would do anything to live her life on the waves.

(Got any questions or prompts for the au? My askbox is open! Want more pirate content? Mosey on up to my pinned post here for links to more pirate AU thoughts, stories and drabbles!)

[mewtonian-physics]

*cocks gun* give us the essay on the bad ships. Or talk abt his good relationships if you prefer (ppl really do refuse to take the shipping goggles off fr)

i will do BOTH

however i will talk about his positive relationships in a second post so people who don't want to see the entire salt mines i contain about this can still get the good content. because i am about to be an unrepentant hater.

so. from the information i've gathered, there are four 'main' raiden ships that people seem to split up between. (there are more minor ones but they all suck too and i don't want to talk about them because many of them venture into the downright horrifying.) those four ships are with the following individuals: rosemary, solid snake, vamp, and jetstream sam. now, when it comes to ships, i go in for the ones that are healthy and don't completely butcher the involved characters, so if anyone's reading this who doesn't give a shit about that then i guess this post won't mean anything to you. this still applies if it's a solely physical relationship--'friends with benefits' still involves them actually being, y'know, able to stand each other, and 'hate sex' as a concept is just... no thanks. plus even in those cases a lot of this kind of thing would still require completely ignoring the characters' actual personalities. not for me, thank you!

bonus points in this particular case because raiden already has so many awful, toxic relationships in his life and i simply do not see why anyone would feel the need to add more. anyway, time to actually get into my complaints. i'm not going to be super tactful about this. or tactful at all, really. you've been warned.

i have talked about the rose thing many times already so i'm just going to skip her because i'm not sure what else there is to say.

i've also touched on the problems with vamp. i like vamp just fine as his own character, but that doesn't mean i don't still disapprove of this idea. they're incompatible by virtue of one of them doesn't really give that much of a shit and just wants to die and the other one is perfectly fine making that happen. yes, yes, vamp is freud's best friend, but that doesn't mean shit on an emotional level and i doubt it really means much if anything on a physical level either. this one would either be vastly unhealthy or ridiculously inaccurate. moving on!

next up i want to talk about solid snake. i'll be honest here, i just do not like the guy, but that isn't the reason why i don't like this ship. again, this one would be incredibly unhealthy. raiden clearly looks up to snake, i'd go so far as to call it hero worship--he seems to think of snake almost as a mentor figure, which, considering the fact that the man who he grew up with and who 'taught him everything' was another of big boss's clones, isn't that much of a surprise. meanwhile, during mgs2, snake... does not treat him like an equal in the slightest. quite the opposite, in fact. even beyond consistently belittling him for his (perceived) lack of experience, rarely giving him any actual positive acknowledgement, insulting him behind his back, and generally just being an asshole... well, this is my hot take: snake doesn't treat raiden that much better than any of the other major players do. he isn't actively trying to kill raiden (but then again, neither are the patriots, for most of it), but other than that, let's run over the list: manipulating raiden, check, lying to him, check, betraying him and throwing him to the wolves when it suits his purposes, check! (also, he basically ignores raiden actively having a mental breakdown and just says a bunch of cryptic and unhelpful shit. how caring of him, i say sarcastically.)

and to say nothing of mgs4! holy shit, mgs4 is bad on the raiden-and-snake front. raiden literally throws himself into danger constantly and almost dies three separate times while trying to protect snake. he WOULD HAVE died at the end there if snake hadn't finally gotten him to stop with the suicide missions. 'my body is a machine, i can take it' you can't put metal in the microwave for a goddamn reason. aaaaand aside from having a couple decent moments, snake is... still an asshole. he tried to take raiden to shadow moses island when he was dying and by the time he finally changed his mind (because a CHILD had to convince him not to) he was telling raiden he had a family when he had already been very clearly told that no, no he doesn't. of course raiden has a breakdown. and snake ignores him. again. raiden pours his heart out and begs snake not to leave him alone and snake just says 'this is my fight' and leaves. that's it. like i said, he has a few moments, but by and large i think it's pretty obvious that raiden cares a lot more about snake than snake does about him.

the inherent emotional and power imbalance that would be and is present in any relationship (platonic (which is what we actually see), romantic, sexual, anything) between the two of them downright horrifies me. raiden would be putting almost all of the work into it for very little in return, and i just... i can't accept that. he deserves better than that.

aaaaaaand jetstream sam. christ. this one is so popular, and for what? for what? their first meeting is sam helping murder a man raiden truly respects and considers a friend. and then maiming him. including destroying one of the only organic parts he has left. all the while mocking him and then almost killing him, too.

and their second meeting doesn't go any better. sam immediately and cheerfully starts messing with raiden's mind, employing brutal psychological warfare to the point that raiden almost lets himself get killed because he's too damn nice for his own good and can barely bring himself to fight back against the people trying to kill him.

this is, of course, all while sam is working for desperado, a company that is kidnapping children off the streets and turning them into brainwashed cyborg soldiers, aka some of the most horrifying things raiden's been put through in his life at the same time. and then he has the nerve to try and take the moral high ground.

and then there's the third meeting! in which they once again try to kill each other. the fact that sam is calling raiden a pretty boy and saying to 'show [him] a good time' during this fight does not mean anything. he's not flirting with him, he's mocking him. his tendency to do that is literally one of his most blatant character traits. it's creepy. and even if he was flirting, that's not nearly enough to build anything off of.

the fact that he decides to help raiden at the end also doesn't mean anything. unless you want to look at his dlc and decide that since he decided to help armstrong that means you ship THEM.

that's actually another of the reasons it would never work. raiden is an idealist. he has very strong beliefs about right and wrong. and sam... doesn't. his little 'we've heard enough speeches about ideals' is just something he says to disguise the fact that he doesn't have any. he flip-flops over committing atrocities like he's trying to decide what to have for breakfast. meanwhile raiden would have sooner let armstrong kill him than help with his plans. they're completely incompatible. raiden might have had some respect for sam's fighting skills, but he'd never respect him as a person. because sam goes against everything he is.

i could say so much more on that, but this post is long enough as is, and i've already made you wait almost four hours... sorry about that... i have a lot of thoughts. a lot of them.

[youvebeenlivingfictional]

I’m Always Curious Part Thirty One

Previous Part | Next Part |  Masterlist Notes: I hope everyone’s having a good week 💕

Warnings: Cursing and some angst my bad Summary: Eli knew as well as I did how hard it was for me to relax after a Tag and Run, let alone a manual one.

“I’ve seen you pull some reckless shit, but launching yourself into the middle of an active and radioactive debris field with a ship on the verge of breakdown under you, that’s… That’s gotta be top five,” Eli commented as Pollard scanned me. I shot him a tired look. “I didn’t have any other options.” “I know,” He shook his head, “But...Damn, kid.” “I’m back, I’m one piece, so maybe save the lecture for some occasion where I wind up in a biobed.”

“Heart rate is still a little high,” Pollard commented, stepping around in front of me and shining a light in my eyes. I startled a bit at the sudden flash before I settled. 

“And when was the last time you slept?” She added, brow furrowing. “I feel like if you really wanted to know, you would’ve asked before I piloted.” Pollard gave me a stern look that probably should’ve made me wilt, but adrenaline was still coursing through my body. “How do you feel?” She asked, a little imperious. “Like I’ll be happy if I never get behind the controls of an attack fighter again.” That made her smile a bit, at least. She nodded. “I want to check on you again before you leave the ship, make sure that heart rate is back down where it’s supposed to be.” “Yes ma’am.” “And get some sleep. I am not above sedating you.” “...I believe that.” “You might wanna get that hypo ready now, doc—” “Can it, Durling,” I cut him off, reaching for my jacket. He gave me a disapproving look as I stood. Eli knew as well as I did how hard it was for me to relax after a Tag and Run, let alone a manual one. If I lay in the dark, my mind would just run through what I had done, all of the ways that it could’ve gone wrong. I was sure that this experience was going to be no different; if anything, the possibilities for a different outcome were increased. “You heading for the gym?” Durling asked as we walked out of the medbay. It was a fair question, but as comfortable as my civvies were, I certainly wasn’t prepared to be sparring in them. “Nah, not this time. You got a report to file?” I asked. “Yeah— Hey,” Eli reached out, taking light hold of my shoulder, “I need to talk to you.” “Look, I will get some sleep—” “No, not about that,” He shook his head. He glanced around the hall, quiet as someone passed us before he turned back to me, “It’s about my assignment after this.” “...Okay,” I frowned. “They’re giving me the Pinnacle.” Confusion melted from my face and I grinned, socking him in the shoulder, unable to contain my excitement. “Eli! That’s amazing— Why didn’t you tell me before? Oh, congratulations!” I squealed, drawing him in for a hug. He chuckled, patting my shoulder before leaning away. “We had a job to do first,” He shook his head. “That’s why you weren’t putting the tag down yourself, huh?” I asked. “There’s something else.” “What else could there possibly be?” “I need a first officer.” “Oh. So who are your candidates?” Eli’s brows rose, and he tipped his head forward a bit. Realization washed over me slowly, and I found myself fighting the urge to shake my head and ask him what the hell he was thinking. “What?… Eli—” “Hear me out,” He pleaded softly, “You know my every move, you get how I operate, you don’t let me get away with shit, you know when to push and when to pull… And I swear I did not mean that the way it sounded.” “Bullshit.” “See?” He pointed out before tacking on, “Look, don’t answer me right now. I know it’s a big decision, just… Just think about it.” I gave him a small nod in concession, a murmur of promise that I would. But as I watched his retreating back, I already knew what my answer was. --

The canteen was basically deserted. I walked over to the replicators, leaning heavily against the wall beside it and scrubbing my hand over my face. “Black coffee, four shots of espresso— splash of caramel creamer.”

“Are you planning on having a heartbeat after that?” I did, but mine skipped a beat at the sound of his voice. It seemed to be doing that a lot lately. “The caramel is just to sweeten it a bit,” I justified, “Doesn’t taste the same as the Una Matrix, so I’ve gotta make do.” I glanced back to find him leaning against a table nearby. “Everything alright on the Bridge?” I asked, turning back to the replicator. “Fine,” He conceded, “And the shuttle bay?” “Uh…” I straightened, taking hold of the mug, “Well, Jett is cursing my name. Apparently Eli’s messed up a number of phaser cannons but having a damaged warp nacelle and a punctured cabin really takes the cake.” “Is that much coffee advisable after what you’ve just done? I’d think some rest would be in order.” “And Dr. Pollard would agree with you, but I can never sleep after tags,” I admitted. I cleared my throat, “So, how... “ It had been way too long to ask about how he was, hadn't it? We’d been on the same ship for hours now— “How’s um— Spock?” Christopher’s brows rose a little. “He’s...Taking leave.” I frowned. “That’s unlike him.” “Well, the war took its toll on the crew, such as it was.” I nodded a little, leaning back against the wall again, “I can understand that.” Christopher’s head tipped to the side, brow furrowing. “How so? I mean no disrespect, Commander, but you were very much in the thick of it.” “Yeah, but,” I lowered my eyes to my drink, “You all...Had to wait, I guess. You got your news about people that you were concerned about in a delayed fashion, and from a distance— all secondhand, second rate. Maybe some of the crew held themselves back from reaching out to people, not sure how they’d take it, not wanting to distract them... That time, that distance, it can wear someone down.” It was a moment before I heard Chris take in a deep breath. “We should talk,” he said softly. “We are talking,” I pointed out. When I glanced up to look at him, I found an unimpressed little frown affixed to his lips. I rolled my eyes a little, pushing away from the wall and nodding for him to follow me: “C’mon.” I was relieved to hear his footfalls behind mine without a moment’s hesitation. “I know where the quiet spots are and I’m willing to bet you haven’t found them yet.” “By Ensign Tilly’s account, you were only on this ship for a couple of days,” Pike commented. “Yes,” I nodded, “And in that time, she told me where all the cool kids hang out. From there, I used those tips, the ship’s directory, and the process of elimination to find a few quiet spots.” I peered into a small suite and found it empty. The outer wall was wrapped with a window. There was a desk with a reading lamp on one end of the room and a loveseat and side table on the other end. “This alright?” I asked, nodding inside. Pike peered around before stepping in fully. I took that as a yes and followed him in, the door sliding shut behind us.  “What’d you come in here for?” He asked, looking around. “Studying, once. I had to brush up on my Klingon while I was aboard,” I told him, sitting down on the loveseat. I set my coffee aside for a moment, shrugging my jacket off and draping it over the arm of the seat before picking my cup up again. I watched Christopher drift around the room, taking it in, his fingers trailing the wood of the desk. I leaned back against the cushions, taking a long pull from the coffee and wincing from the taste. “Too much coffee?” “Just not as good as the Una Matrix,” I justified. I glanced up at him to find him leaning back against the desk, arms folded across his chest. For a moment the both of us just… looked. It reminded me of the moments in his Ready Room before we beamed down to Sandblossom— but we were so different now. “So who told you?” I asked. “Una.” “How’d that go?” Christopher averted his eyes, tipping his head forward a bit, “Well, she… Sat me down, laid out Spock’s timeline, let me know that you were on the Pinnacle.” “Can I ask when that was?” “You’d been aboard for about a month.” That couldn’t have been very long after Una had called me, then. I could only imagine her demeanor when she’d told him. I nodded a bit. “I don’t… I do not know how much Admiral Cornwell told you, but she—” “Kat mentioned before she left that she had you give your word not to contact the Enterprise.”  “Okay.” “Though I am a little surprised you kept to it,” Christopher admitted. I considered that for a moment, fingers tapping along the side of my mug. “Sometimes I couldn’t believe it either. I hated it. But...Cornwell told me that you were determined to come back to Somonia for me, when you heard about the negotiations—” I watched as Chris pushed himself away from the desk, drifting over to look out of the window. I saw the tight pull of his shoulders, the wringing of his hands where he had them clasped behind his back. “Besides that,” I added quietly, “I was sure that being so removed from the war was weighing on you all in some estimation. And after Una contacted me…” I shook my head, “I'm not sure how I would've handled speaking with anyone else from the Enterprise.” Christopher frowned, and I could see the question forming as he turned to look at me. I raised a hand to halt it: “We’re fine. We spoke when the ship was docked on Earth recently.” “How long were you two out of contact?” “A while,” I answered flatly. Christopher shook his head a little bit. I slouched down against the cushions. “Why didn’t—...” I started before I stopped myself, cringing. “What would you have wanted me to say?” He asked knowingly.  “Anything, Christopher! I didn’t even know that you knew.” I set my coffee aside and rested my elbows against my knees, running my hands over my face. “I didn’t think you would want to hear from us after we left you there.” He said it so softly, with such abject confidence; it nearly split me in two. I lifted my head, brow drawn, disbelieving of what I’d heard, only to find that Christopher had turned back to the window, chin tipped toward his chest. “...After you—… No,” I sighed, pushing myself off of the loveseat, “No, you didn’t.” “We should’ve turned around,” The assertion followed fast, his voice tight, “We would’ve found you— We would’ve been in range for the war, none of this would’ve happened.” I stopped a couple of steps from him. There was a time when I wouldn’t have hesitated in reaching out to touch him, to draw him in, but I wasn’t sure anymore. “I saw the pictures that you got from Starbase 329,” I said softly, “It was a crater, Christopher, there was no way you could’ve known. And Choholl and I were so far underground for stretches at a time, you may not have been able to find us, even if you had turned around.” He turned his head toward me a little, but did not meet my eye. “I considered reaching out,” He admitted softly, “But I didn’t know what to say. ‘Hi’ seemed...inappropriate, and… And I was worried.” “About what?” “You. What you said, about not wanting to distract someone, keeping yourself at a distance…” He trailed off, nodding, “Does take its toll.” I watched him for a moment, considering this. Christopher had thought about me. I supposed that that was some consolation, at least; I hadn’t been alone in my hours spent curious and lonely. “So,” I said lightly, turning to face the window as he had, “What happens after this mission?” “Back to the Enterprise, ideally,” Christopher answered; his voice was firmer now, a little more self-sure now that I'd turned to a topic he was likely more comfortable with. I felt him turn to look at me as he asked, “Do you...Know where you’ll be stationed next?” “No. Command did mention something about reinstating Larilia to the Federation, now that Choholl has everything under control. They’re going to need a new attaché, they asked if I’d be interested.” I felt him tense beside me, “And what did you say?” “That I’d retire first.” He huffed a soft laugh, and I smiled a little. My mind drifted to the offer given to me earlier, and I shook my head a little bit. “What is it?” He asked. “Nothing.” “Are you sure?” I hesitated, “Eli is being given the Pinnacle. He needs a first officer and he… He offered me the position.” I turned to look up at Christopher, and I saw the split second of surprise before he schooled his face into a small smile. “What are you thinking?” He asked. I shook my head, turning away again. “I’m going to tell him ‘no’. Just haven’t worked out how yet.” “Why are you turning him down?” “Well, he needs someone— You know, more like Una. I am not like Una.” “... Well, you did take Onafuwa’s one-day intensive.” It took me a moment, and I opened my mouth to respond, but I could not help the laugh that bubbled up. I slapped my hand over my mouth, trying to quiet the sound, but Christopher laughed, too. For a moment, just a moment, it felt like it used to— light, and warm. I looked at him, and found that grin that I’d missed; the crinkling around his eyes and the dimples. And as we quieted, as we found one another just looking again, I felt my eyes prickle with tears. I hurried to look away again, turning back to where I’d set my coffee and walking back to it. I settled down onto the loveseat, taking a long pull from the mug and using it to cover a small sniffle. I expected Christopher to stay where he was, but he followed, sitting down beside me. He was close— but then, the loveseat was small, he had no choice but to be close. “You really ought to rest,” He said quietly. “I can’t,” I shook my head, “After one of those—” I sighed, closing my eyes for a moment, “My head just doesn’t settle right.” “Is it always like this?” I nodded a bit. I felt Christopher shift beside me a little before I heard him mutter, “C’mere.” I glanced over and did a double-take, my heart leaping into my throat when I found him leaned back, his arm thrown over the back of the loveseat. “What?” “Come here,” He urged more softly, nodding me closer. I narrowed my eyes at him before I set the coffee down, shifting a little closer. I was nearly pressed fully against his side this way, from knee to chest.  “Put your head down,” He urged, nodding to his shoulder. “Chris—” “Just try it.” I huffed, irritated but did as he said. His arm curled around my shoulders. “Close your eyes.” “If you really think is is going to work—” “So stubborn,” He mumbled, resting his chin atop my head and my eyes fluttered shut at the comforting weight, “Stubborn as stone.” If Christopher thought that this was going to calm me down, he was severely mistaken; my heart was pounding out of my chest, my stomach was twisting itself into knots. I hadn’t felt worked up like this since after Koutov. Christopher’s fingers trailed over my shoulder softly, and I found myself reaching out and setting my hand on his jacket. “...The blue’s...Different,” I commented. “Wanna command the ship, you’ve gotta wear the uniform,” He pinched the sleeve of my t-shirt as he said so. I rolled my eyes a little. “Good thing I don’t wanna command, then,” I muttered. Christopher’s chest shook with a quiet laugh. “Gotta say… it is a good thing you’re turning Durling down, if only for the fact that you seem to fight so much,” He said. “It’s all in good fun… Mostly in good fun.” “The two of you seem close.” I glanced up at Christopher. “We’re friends,” I nodded. “Close your eyes,” He muttered, poking my shoulder when he saw me looking at him. I huffed, doing as he said. My fingers absently skated over a section of the gold braiding covering the zipper on the jacket, unable to keep still. “That wasn’t an accusation, by the way,” He added. “Sounded like one.” “Wasn’t.” “Mm.” I wasn’t sure what it was— the hum of the ship around us, or the steady rise and fall of his chest under my hand, or just the feeling of being by Christopher again, but I felt myself relaxing, eyelids and limbs growing heavy. “We should— I should finish my coffee,” I mumbled after a while. “Why’s that?” Christopher murmured. “‘M gonna fall asleep.” “Good.” I smiled a little, “‘M gonna fall asleep on you.” “You’re already falling asleep on me.” “So...Should move.” “You comfortable?” “Mmmmmhm.” “Okay.” That okay was all I needed. I cozied deeper into Christopher’s side, unabashedly cuddling up against him, and I felt his hand smooth soothingly over my arm. In my haze and weariness, the tears that I’d managed to push down before welled up. Now, though, I felt too tired to hide them again. A few leaked from my eyes, and I pressed my face into his shoulder. “I missed you so much,” I admitted quietly, hand fisting in his jacket. I felt his grip tighten on me, his other hand covering mine, thumb skating over my knuckles. “I know,” Christopher whispered; I could feel his lips quivering as they brushed my temple, “I missed you, too.” Tag list: @angels-pie​ ; @fantasticcopeaglepasta​  ; @mylittlelonelyappreciationtoo​ ; @how-am-i-serpose-to-know​ ; @onlyhereforthefandomandgiggles​ ; @inmyowncorner​​  ; @tardis-23​  ; @paintballkid711 ; @katrynec​ ; @hypnobananaangelfish ; @elen-aranel​ ; @blueeyesatnight​ ; @hotchswifey​

[finnsgrin]

Unspoken Love - Jasper Jordan

Jasper Jordan x reader

From my Wattpad: inanoncriminalwayy

GIF: juhnmorphy

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

After his unfortunate encounter with the Grounders, you confess your feelings for Jasper, fearing his life is slipping away and you'll never have the chance to tell him.

SEASON 1 SPOILERS

Word count: 5,570

Published: June 14, 2020

TW: Blood and pain

A/N, PLEASE READ! Hey everyone! This is my first ever The 100 Imagine! I know it's long, but what else do you have to do while quarantined? I hope you like this Imagine! If you use other pronouns, just replace them with the ones I used in this Imagine. I used she/her, because that's personally what I use.

xx, El

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

♡Masterlist♡

"Please please PLEASE be safe."

Lack of oxygen on the Ark was a luxury compared to how much air your best friends Jasper and Monty were being deprived of as you held them both tightly in a group hug.

"(Y/N)...can't...breath." Jasper patted you quickly several times on the back, awkwardly trying to escape from your embrace.

You released them, giving an apologetic smile.

"We'll be fine. We're just gonna get food and water, and we'll be back before nightfall." Monty gently reassured you.

That was what scared you the most.

How were they so calm in a situation such like this?

Hurdled from the sky onto the ground which wasn't even 100% survivable, miles away from the fallout shelter you were supposed to be at, with 100, (now 98) teenage delinquents who had no adult supervision whatsoever.

Yeah, what could go wrong?

You took one last look at Jasper, who was adjusting his black goggles on his forehead, and gazing in awe at the green forest which surrounded you.

Without warning, you flung into his arms.

He stumbled back, off balance.

"Woah, (Y/N), chill out. We'll be fine." He laughed, hugging you once more.

"Why don't I get a hug like that?" Monty pouted, jutting his lip out, a smirk dancing on his lips.

You smiled, gifting one of your famous hugs to the boy.

Monty broke away, grinning, and turned to Clarke Griffin, who was now calling out orders to those on the ground.

"Okay, everyone, listen up! Finn, Jasper, Monty, Octavia, Wells, Bellamy and I are all going to the mountain where were originally supposed to land. We'll be grabbing everything we need for a day or so, and then we're all gonna hike there together. (Y/N) (Y/L/N) is in charge. Out of all of us, she paid the most attention in our survival classes. If you even have a prayer of getting through the night without being eaten alive, I strongly advise that you listen to her. Do I make myself clear?"

Disapproving murmurs could be heard around camp, mainly from John Murphy and his group of friends.

"Who made you Queen of the ground?" Murphy spoke up, several people agreeing with him.

Bellamy pushed his way towards the front of the crowd, causing everyone to quiet down.

"No one did. But Clarke's right. Out of all of us, (Y/L/N) is the one who knows what to do. Now you can run off by yourself, or you can pitch in and have a shot at surviving."

All eyes trailed on me, and I couldn't stop the blush that crept on my cheeks.

I never enjoyed being the center of attention. Now I had to babysit 90 rebellious teenagers?

There was no way they were ever going to listen to me. I didn't even commit a crime! I was framed. We have nothing in common except that we were all born on the Ark and flung to the ground. It was just pure luck that Monty and Jasper happened to be on the drop ship. I could trust no one but them.

The 7 teens made their way to the woods, and I felt panic surge through me.

I had liked Jasper for the longest time.

I've always been a closed book. You're lucky if you get through chapter one.

But Jasper and Monty know everything about me.

The one thing they both don't know, is my love for Jasper.

Normally, I would trust Monty, like I did with everything else.

But this was different.

The boy who defended me when I was getting bullied and pushed around by John Murphy.

The boy who helped me with my science homework.

The boy who made me laugh when a smile seemed impossible.

We had sat across each other on the drop ship, fear evident in both of our eyes.

Even then, when death could have been minutes away, I still didn't have the guts to tell him how I feel.

"Jasper!" I caught his wrist, the touch familiar to me.

He turned, eyebrow raised, waiting for a response.

I chickened out.

"Your shoes untied." Was the best I could come up with.

He smirked at our inside joke.

The day we had met was the first day of kindergarten, and I was wearing a pair of my moms old slip on shoes.

Jasper came up to me with a red crayon in his hand, and told me with a smile that my shoe was untied.

I frowned, looking down at my feet.

"But I don't have laces." I had explained, perplexed.

He laughed, explaining the joke and then introducing me to his friend, Monty.

But we were naive school kids then who had no worries other than if an asteroid was going to strike the Ark.

"Let's go!" I heard Bellamy Blake, the oldest of us all, call to Jasper who I was still holding on to.

It's now or never, (Y/N).

"Jasper, we gotta go, man!" Monty jogged back, tugging on his arm.

I let go, and he was gone.

Tears pricked my eyes and I felt stupid.

What if that was the last chance I ever had? What if he got eaten by a giant worm?

I shook my head, forcing the bad out.

Now, all I could think of was positive.

It took me a few seconds to realize that a group had gathered around me. Some looking bored, others scared.

"So, what do we do now?" A girl with her arms crossed over her chest asked me.

I blinked, reminding myself that I was now in charge.

Thanks, Clarke.

I made a mental note to give her a piece of my mind as soon as things settled down.

Back on the Ark, I was often the first choice parents had when they needed a babysitter.

Kids loved me, and I connected with them effortlessly.

Something told me a group building activity wasn't going to happen down here.

I cleared my throat, my mind racing.

Yes, I had paid the most attention in our survival classes, but now it seemed like everything I learned had been erased.

"Well? Do you know anything, or not?" John Murphy was tapping his foot impatiently.

Part of me wanted to snap back with sass, something I was particularly good at.

But this was no time for conflict.

If there's one thing I know about kids, it's that they hate being told what to do.

But these weren't just any kids.

Some of them were here for murder.

"There are 90 of us in all. We're all going to divid equally and do our share. If you don't wanna do anything, that's fine. Just note that you won't be having dinner tonight."

The few people who had secluded themselves from the group joined us.

I began counting off, making sure to keep Murphy with me as I was clearly the only one who had self control.

Anyone else would gladly tear his head off.

I had ten people working on the drop ship, cleaning up the inside.

Eighteen more were scavenging what they could and bringing it outside, as well as picking up debris on the outside.

A few feet away from where we landed were a field of flowers, several which I knew to be edible.

Twenty of us plucked primrose, thistle, dandelions, rose hip, and daisies.

I had another twenty scavenge for pine nuts along the trunk of trees, and strip the needles for tea.

Ten more were starting fires, and another ten setting snares in the forest, which I had to teach them how to do.

It was good, having something to take my mind off of Jasper.

With John Murphy by my side, I had a lot more to think about.

Why hadn't anyone killed this boy?

Could I kill him now?

Why did he talk so much?

"Am I gonna get dinner tonight? You're not letting me do anything." He grumbled as I helped a girl assemble her twitch up snare.

You'll be lucky if you aren't dead by tonight. I'll kill you myself. I thought to myself.

"You are doing something. You're my...apprentice. The only one who has enough strength to tell people what to do. There's a sense of authority in you. You've already watched me make the fires and snares and okay the plants. If anything were to happen to me, you would take my place."

That was a downright lie.

I would trust a wild pack of wolves before I put my trust in John Murphy.

But my lie seemed to appease him, and he was quiet for a few minutes.

I knew there was water somewhere, which is why I didn't send anyone for it.

Vegetation was so evident, and plants were lush and beautiful. I could hear the roar of a stream nearby.

Besides, I didn't want anyone out of my sight.

Turns out with 88 people working feverishly, the job is done fairly quick.

The drop ship was cleaned out, the bodies buried, plants picked, and nuts peeled.

Everyone collapsed on the ground, exhausted.

"Good work everyone. I'm gonna take these plants down to the stream and wash them off. Those who set snares, please set some more, or teach others how to do so."

Someone had managed to scrounge up a makeshift metal pot from inside the drop ship, and several sheets of thin fabric.

If it were up to me, I would have gone to the stream by myself. A few minutes of alone time were all I really needed.

But, it wasn't up to me.

This was life or death.

"Murphy, I need you to come with me. Bring your friends, too. I need strong people to carry back the water."

Feeding the ego of cocky boys is so easy.

Murphy and his friends agreed to go, flexing their muscles as they walked along the path of the woods with me.

"Who's watching camp while we're gone?" One of Murphys friends asked, wiping his sweaty brow with the back of his hands.

Shoot.

I knew I had forgotten something.

"I'm sure they can all manage for a few minutes."

I hoped so.

"You all worked really hard. I think everyone is too tired to start a fight."

I hope that was true, too.

We reached the stream which wasn't too far from camp. It wasn't big by any means, but it was enough to hydrate and clean us.

Murphy and his friends beamed from ear to ear, and I stopped them before they could continue with their plan.

"Wait until we clean and collect. THEN you can hop in."

That seemed to be agreeable enough, after I explained that we would be swallowing their sweat if they got in now.

I took the greens, and bundled them together in a sheet of cloth, and bunched the material together, then dunked them, giving it a shake.

As the boys frolicked in the water, my mind wandered back to Jasper.

How long had they been gone?

An hour? Two?

What if they never came back? What if I was now the mother of these criminals?

"That's enough playing. We gotta get back." I stood from the flat rock I was sitting on, and ignored the grumbled complaints from the soaked boys.

It was a relief that I had asked several people to come along. There was no way I could carry that giant vessel full of water on my own.

Thankfully, things were more or less the same when we arrived back at camp.

Some people fanned themselves with sheets of metal found in the drop ship.

Others dozed on the grass, occasionally swatting away a bug.

But the best thing was my group of snarers holding up several fat rabbits that must have stumbled into their traps.

Everyone cheered, engrossed by the sight of fresh meat.

I smiled, setting the plants by my feet.

"Excellent! We'll have a lovely stew tonight!" I announced, examining the prey.

Water was boiling, greens were being sorted, and rabbit was being skinned.

"They're back!" I heard someone call.

I set down the rabbit I was currently breaking the legs of, and I hopped up.

My eyes searched for Jasper, more than excited to present to him the lovely meal we were able to have tonight.

I wondered what they had brought back with them.

But I didn't see Jasper.

1,2,3,4,5,6...

Six?

Six of our people sprinted into camp, faces red and sweat drenched clothes.

"Everyone in the drop ship! Move, move!" I heard Bellamy scream.

Jasper? Where was Jasper?

"Where's Jasper?" I ran to Monty, who looked like he was about to pass out.

He shook slightly, and extended his trembling hand to me.

Clutched tightly in between his fingers, were Jaspers goggles.

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

Confused and frightened glances were exchanged as we all stumbled into the drop ship, abandoning the food, and the boiling water over the fire.

Panic surged through me once more as I struggled to make sense of our new reality.

"What happened?"

"Is he dead?"

"Did you make it to the mountain?"

Questions were being thrown like dodgeballs in gym class.

I blinked, adjusting my eyes to the dimly lit space in the drop ship.

Bellamy had closed the door.

Claustrophobia crept over me and I felt sick.

The only thing keeping me steady was Monty's arm, which I was clutching like a lifeline.

"Everyone shut up!" Bellamy's booming voice echoed throughout the small space, and we all covered our ears as the sound bounced back to us.

All fell silent.

"Where's the one with the goggles?" A girl with a big mouth asked.

Bellamy clenched his jaw, and looked at the ground, frustration radiating off of him.

"I need you all to remain calm." He said in a voice that wasn't calm whatsoever.

Murphy scoffed.

"Calm? You run through the woods like Bigfoot is chasing you and you want us to remain calm?"

No one argued with this.

"We're not alone here on the ground." Clarke began.

A blanket of fear rested upon all of us.

"What do you mean, not alone?" A girl by the name of Harper spoke up.

"I mean what I just said. We were attacked on our way to the mountain and whatever it was took Jasper with them." Clarke struggled to remain composed.

I felt my breath catch in my throat, and a strangled sob escaped my chapped lips.

Everyone was in an uproar now, screaming and wailing.

I sunk to my knees, holding the goggles to my chest.

Hot tears streamed down my face and I let out a strangled cry.

Why didn't I tell him?

I let my insecurities get in the way and I couldn't tell him that I loved him?

And now he was as good as dead.

My shoulders shook, and Monty knelt down next to me, tears trailing down his cheeks as well.

"We'll find him. I swear to you, we will find him, (Y/N)."

He sounded like he needed some reassurance himself.

Someone was wailing. The kind of cry that made you want to cover your ears and hide away forever.

It took a moment to come to the realization that I was the one making the sound.

The only sound now was my sobs and ragged breath. My fellow inmates backed away, allowing Bellamy a clear path to where Monty and I were situated.

I felt an unfamiliar touch on my shoulder.

It was Bellamy, and he looked at me with determination.

"We will find him. But right now we need to lay low." He spoke softly.

Anger welled inside me.

"If it were Octavia, you would have a search party out right now! What makes Jaspers life any less important?" I hissed, venom coating every word.

Bellamy held his tongue.

No one argued against me, but no one exactly agreed with me either.

"We leave at first light. Those who want to volunteer, come see me." He announced, walking away.

Monty and I held each other, sobs wracking our bodies.

I spent a good portion of the night bawling my eyes out.

I felt kind of bad. Monty held me, as calm as he could be in this situation, telling me stories and reciting my favorite poems.

When we all had settled down for the night, some of us asleep, I heard Murphy a few feet away from us talking in a hushed voice.

"Now we're all hungry because that one chick didn't bring any of the food in here. It's all outside probably being eaten by whatever the hell took Jasper."

If I had the energy, I would have ripped Murphy's throat out right then and there.

But my chest was tight from all of the crying, and dehydration was setting in.

"Come on, man. The girl just lost her boyfriend. We can go a night without dinner." One of Murphy's cronies stood up for me.

Boyfriend?

Did people really think we were a couple?

Maybe it falls on me and how I reacted.

I had been awake, counting my breaths.

How many did Jasper have left?

"You're in love with him." Monty spoke, disrupting the quiet.

"What?" I attempted to play it dumb.

He scoffed, sitting up.

"I see the way you look at him, (Y/N). It's like...all the stars in the galaxy can't even compare."

I bit my lip, unsure of what to say or do in this situation.

"I do love him, Monty. I really do."

A fresh set of tears welled up in my eyes and began to spill.

"And I never even got to tell him." I cried.

Monty shushed me, rubbing my back soothingly.

"We'll get him back. I know we will. But for right now, we can't dwell on the past. Try and get some sleep." He smiled down kindly at me.

I didn't sleep at all that night.

Go figure.

I pretended to, though. For Montys sake.

He must have been up for two hours before he finally succumbed to sleep himself.

Maybe it would have been best if I had slept that night.

There were no windows on the drop ship, so there was no way to tell when it was morning. So I listened carefully for the sounds of the crickets to subside and the chirps of the birds to arrive.

I jumped to my feet, accidentally stepping on Murphy's hand.

"Ow! What the hell?!" He shouted, still half asleep.

"It's daylight. We have to go find Jasper." I shook Monty awake, my eyes on a frantic search for a sleeping Bellamy.

I found him by the door, near Octavia.

"Bellamy-Bellamy wake up." I shoved him several times, and he awoke with a "Snork?"

"We have to go find Jasper. Get up." I bent over to re-lace my shoes, but was stopped in my tracks.

"(Y/N), (Y/N), slow down." He sprung up, and placed both of his hands on my shoulders.

I wondered if he had even slept at all. Deep purple bags hung low over his eyes.

"No, I'm not going to slow down. We have to go. Who are the volunteers?"

I pivoted around to Monty, but Bellamy twirled me to face him.

"(Y/N), you're not going. You have to stay here at camp." Bellamy spoke the words slowly.

I did a double take.

That had to be some sort of sick joke.

"Like hell I am. Jasper's my-."

"I know. I know. But you have to stay here. You did so good leading the camp yesterday. I need you to stay here."

Several emotions registered on my face at once.

Confusion, anger, betrayal...

"If it was Octavia out there and someone tried to stop you-."

"Stop bringing Octavia into this. Besides you're dead on your feet. If anything happened I doubt you would be able to escape in time." He interrupted once again.

His words weighed heavy.

He was right. I was exhausted. Staying up all night getting over the potential death of my long time crush/best friend tore me to pieces.

"Maybe Jasper is literally dead on his feet. What would be the irony of that?" Murphy's snide comment earned a few chuckles from those around him.

I shoved past Bellamy, and charged towards Murphy, who's smirk turned into shock.

"Do you think this is a fucking joke Murphy?!" I screamed as he avoided a harsh slap to the face.

"Woah, woah!" Bellamy held me back as I screamed obscenities at Murphy who backed away, sneering at me as if I were the insane one who was making disgusting jokes.

I struggled for a bit, and collapsed against Bellamy's chest, sobbing.

I was so angry.

Angry at myself for being so weak.

Angry at Murphy who couldn't be serious for five minutes.

Angry at Bellamy and Clarke and everyone else who didn't keep Jasper safe.

"I love him! I love him, Bellamy. Please, bring him back. Bring him back alive." I gasped, collapsing to the ground, Bellamy falling with me.

"We will. I will. I promise." Bellamy forced me look at him, and he turned to Clarke.

He told Clarke that she needed to stay here and start building a wall around the camp. I was clearly in no state to do much of anything.

That made me angry, too. If I had just gotten some shut eye last night I could have gone with the search party.

Monty was suddenly in front of me, his eyes blood shot, voice clear.

"(Y/N), listen to me. Are you listening to me?" He shook my shoulders harshly, and I nodded my head.

"No matter what happens, if we find Jasper or not, you need to stay strong. It's what he would want."

How could he say that?

IF we find Jasper?

We will find him!

Even if it meant I had to search the entire planet and beyond.

Clarke was suddenly down next to me, turning my head towards her, staring intently into my bloodshot eyes.

"She's definitely exhausted. Dehydrated, too. Monty, I think it's best if you stay here with her. I'll get her some water."

I could tell Monty was upset that he couldn't go either, but, we both needed each other right now.

He took a seat next to me, and draped an arm around my shoulder.

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

The remainder of the day was a blur.

I vaguely recall a cup of pine needle tea being pushed to my lips, and someone trying to persuade a few pine nuts in me.

I drank the tea, but was too nauseated to eat anything.

Clarke and the rest of those who stayed behind worked on a wall/fence. I caught glimpses of it outside the drop ship door. It consisted of scraps from the ship, and large planks of tree bark.

I dozed in and out occasionally, but awoke to the slightest of sounds.

Monty was always there to calm me down.

It must have been noon, when there was a series of shouts that awoke me from my twelfth nap of the day.

Clarke rushed in, shoving scraps aside and making room on a flat surface that served as a makeshift table.

I bolted upright, a nasty case of vertigo settling into my brain which was still fuzzy from lack of sleep.

My heart stopped.

Either they had found him, or there was a new causality.

Bellamy, Finn, and Wells were carrying a half conscious Jasper, whose face was green and beaded with sweat.

"Get him on the table!" Clarke demanded as she searched frantically for something.

He was shirtless, a large scab like wound smack dab in the middle of his chest, blood and pus oozing from it.

Monty gagged, and ran out of the ship.

I could hear him vomiting violently.

I didn't blame him.

Jaspers eyes shot open, and he let out a mangled groan, flailing his arms around.

"Keep him still!" Clarke's voice sounded far away.

I rushed to his aid, and took one of his hands which was dirty and covered in covered in grime.

"Jasper, Jasper can you hear me?" I squeezed his hand.

He groaned again in response, tears running into his ears.

I wiped them away.

"You're gonna be okay. You're safe now. You're back at the drop ship. Clarke is going to make you better." My words were thick and it was hard to talk.

Clarke shooed everyone else away, only a few acceptations allowed to stay.

"Finn, go get me a wet rag." Clarke's voice trembled.

That wasn't a good sign.

The doctor was supposed to be calm.

"Can you save him?" I asked, hardly wanting to know the answer.

She grew silent.

"I'll do my best." She spoke.

Jasper was still screaming, and he weakly squeezed my hand.

"Make it stop, please, make it stop." He begged through the wails of agony.

My heart broke.

What could I do?

I would take the pain in a second.

I would do anything.

"Jasper, just focus on my words, yeah?"

What was I supposed to even talk about?

The Ark? The ground?

Both subjects were painful.

He let out a cry as Clarke ever so gently prodded his collarbone with her fingers.

"What the hell?" She frowned, examining the gash more intently.

"What is it?" Bellamy took to her side, intrigued.

Clarke was quiet for a moment, her brows furrowed, confused.

"Whoever, or, whatever did this to him cauterized the wound. He would have bled out by now."

What?

That made zero sense.

Why would you kidnap someone, stab them, and then heal them?

Jasper cried again.

"Don't you have anything for the pain?" I practically begged, already knowing the answer.

"We would probably have something if we were at the mountain. But the only thing we have now is time."

Time?

How much time did he have left?

Jaspers hand went limp, and my blood went cold.

Clarke placed her hand on his forehead.

"He's burning up. I need wet cloth, and lots of it."

She turned to Bellamy, who left in a second.

"He's still breathing, but barely. It looks like an infection. I'm gonna have to reopen the wound, clean it, and recauterize it."

I felt acidic bile rise in my throat.

For Jaspers sake, I prayed he would stay unconscious.

I think Wells was telling me what happened, and how they found him, but it's like everything went static.

Bits and pieces of his sentences wormed their way into my shattered mind as I gripped the metal table and Jaspers hand.

Jasper screamed, his back arching, blood spewing all over his chest and my face.

"(Y/N), I need you to keep him still. I'm almost finished cleaning it. Someone get me a hot knife!"

Jaspers eyes found mine, his wild and frantic.

"(Y/N), please make it stop. It hurts so bad! Make it stop!" He sobbed.

Tears of my own fell onto his pale skin.

I struggled to find my voice.

"Jasper, I know it's hard, but you need to stay still so Clarke can help you, okay? You're almost done. The worst is over."

Was it?

He screamed again, squeezing my hand. Quick breaths escaped from his cracked and bleeding lips.

"I...I never thought I would see you again." He admitted, sighing as someone draped a dripping cloth across his forehead.

Neither did I.

"I knew they would find you." I lied.

He blinked in response.

"I'm gonna cauterize it now, okay? Jasper, this is gonna hurt."

Clarke pressed the blazing metal to the gash.

A burnt flesh smell filled the drop ship as Jasper screamed.

Clarke dropped the knife, breathing for the first time in minutes.

"Done, it's over. We just need to get his temperature down." She began to lay more wet cloth on various parts of his body.

Easier said than done.

For the next few hours, Jaspers temperature ranged from blistering hot to the touch, to cold with sweat.

Sweat poured from his entire body, leaving the table slick with moisture.

He was delirious, reaching his hand out for something, and calling for his mother.

Invisible shadows made him scream.

At last, he settled down, his hand still in mine.

"I'll take it from here, (Y/N). You deserve a break." Monty appeared by my side, extending a cup of water to me.

He was right. I needed to get away. I needed to find a desolate spot and just curl up in a ball, close my eyes, and deem this all as a crazy dream.

Smiling kindly, I gently let go of Jaspers hand.

But Jasper used whatever strength he had left in him to hold fast to me.

"(Y/N)...stay." He slurred.

I pushed back disheveled black bangs away from his sweaty forehead.

"I'm not going anywhere." I whispered.

A ghost of a smile danced on his lips.

"I...I love you." He murmured.

I blinked, unsure of what to say or how to react.

"I love you too, Jasper." I whispered, my voice hardly audible.

His lips curled up once more, and sleep overcame him.

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

Three weeks later, Clarke said Jasper was okay to go on short walks for brief periods of time, as long as he had someone with him.

More often than not, it was Monty or me.

The fence had been built, and several stations set up around camp.

Animal skinning, water purification, and food storage were the most busy.

I was praised for my wilderness expertise, and held classes for those who had absolutely no idea what they were doing.

At the end of a class where I was teaching how to tell healthy rabbits apart from rabbits who had rabbit fever, Jasper appeared by my side.

"Gosh! You scared me." I laughed.

He had lost a significant amount of weight, but his smile remained the same.

"You're not supposed to be out of bed without someone." I scolded him.

"I'm not alone. I'm with you. Take a walk with me?" He extended his arm, and we walked with ours interlinked.

It was a slow process, but I loved seeing the look on his face when a bird flew by or the wind rustled the leaves on a tree.

Pure joy.

I felt myself falling more in love with him each and every day.

I had erased the day he had been carried back after serving as a dartboard.

Wiped the words that were exchanged.

He didn't remember them, so why should I?

He probably didn't even mean them in the way I did.

Friends tell friends all the time that they love them.

It was like a twelve pound weight had been lifted off my chest, after telling Jasper how I felt.

It didn't matter if he remembered it or not. I said it, and it was done and over with. No need to bring up the nightmare he had gone through.

"I remember, you know." Jaspers feet slowed down even more, if that were possible.

I turned my head to face him, confused.

"Remember what?"

He grinned, a blush creeping its way to his cheeks.

We were stopped at the back of the drop ship, where the fewest people were, but with the most weapons.

He took a deep breath.

"The night I was found. I-."

"Jasper-."

"No, let me say it."

Great, now I was gonna get friend zoned in a place I couldn't even leave.

Not that it mattered much, anyway. Jasper was alive, and that's all that I cared about.

"I love you, (Y/N). I have for the longest time and...and I thought I was going to die. I had to say it. At least once. And I know you said it back but you were probably just saying it to be nice and I-."

I stood poised on my tiptoes, crushing his lips with mine.

He shut up, kissing me back.

I was careful of his chest. Careful to keep my distance from it.

But he pulled me close, his hands gentle on my waist, mine on his neck.

We pulled apart, breathless.

"I've been wanting to do that for the longest time." He smiled, tucking a strand of loose hair behind my ear.

I blushed, leaning in for another kiss.

"Finally!" I heard a familiar voice behind us.

Monty stood there, grinning with two thumbs up.

Jasper gave him a death glare that screamed get the hell out of here or so help me I will break both of your thumbs.

"Finally! Took you two long enough! I was worried I had to go to plan B and use the power of forged love letters," Monty crossed over, patting Jasper on the back, which earned a few winces.

"I guess all it took was a near death experience. Nothing too extreme."

We all laughed, well, Monty and I did. Jasper just kind of smiled and tried to refrain from laughing.

"I guess this means we're a couple?" Jasper looked at me hopefully.

I gave him a kiss on the cheek.

"I thought you would never ask."

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

♡Masterlist♡

Don't forget to like and comment!

[house-of-galathynius]

Only You ~ Rowaelin

A Rowaelin fanfic, set if Aelin’s parents had lived and she had met Rowan under normal circumstances, if Erawan and Maeve weren’t threats. Hope you enjoy! 

Chapter Three ~ Chapter Five

Chapter Four: Chances

Aelin had sat on her bed thinking of only Rowan. She had tried and failed to read a book, as well as braid her hair and even as far as trying to brush Fleetfoot's coat. But no matter what she did, her mind wandered back to the Fae prince who was her soul-bonded. 

Her maids had knocked on the door an hour ago to dress her for dinner. She had wanted to form an excuse as to why she could not go, but nothing came to mind. And she was sure Aedion or Orlon, or both would come up here and drag her down either way. So she put on her finest gown and let the maids put her hair into a pretty updo and place the tiara on her head. And when she looked in the mirror she balked. Aelin knew she was pretty, as she’d been told by many suitors. But when she gazed at her reflection she really felt pretty. Her cheeks had a rosy glow to them and her eyes were bright. She felt good. 

The maids had let her stare in the mirror a few seconds longer before they ushered her away and down to the dining hall. Elspeth giving her a wink as she departed.

Aedion was at the door when she arrived, looking handsome in all his finery. He seemed to think the same as he grabbed her hand and spun her around before grinning. “You look… you look like a princess.” 

“Don’t you start.” She rolled her eyes.

“I look forward to hearing all about it later. The maids in the kitchen wouldn’t shut up about it.”

“What were you doing in the kitchen? Terrorising the cooks again?” She elbowed his side. 

“I haven’t done that since I was ten.” He elbowed her right back. “I was doing a favour for a friend.” 

“Oh, you mean you were doing whatever you could to get into Lysandra’s good graces? Honestly Aedion, you’d have an easier time winning Ren over than you do Lys.” 

“Very funny Aelin. Should I bring up all your successful relationships? Shall we talk about the mating bond now or later?” That lions grin crept up his face and Aelin didn’t know whether to start a brawl or to laugh along with him. 

“Careful Aedion, she could easily take you in a fight.” Her father stopped behind her, laughing quietly at their bickering. 

“Not without her flame she couldn’t.” Another grin.

“Settle down you two. We do have company. I don’t think they want to see the two of you bickering all night.” Her mothers words silenced them. Aelin poked her tongue out at Aedion as he poked her side, both of them earning stern looks from her parents. 

When they entered the hall Orlon had already been seated at the head of the table, Sellene at the other end. Dispersed along the table were a mixture of Whitethorn family members and spouses, along with members of the Terrasen royal family. Servers were showing everyone to their seats, but even so, Aelin made her way to the usual spot she took at functions such as these, when the server intercepted her before she could sit. 

“Your Highness, you will be seated here tonight.” She looked to the chair that had been pulled out for her and cringed. Sat in the chair to the left was Rowan. She glanced to Orlon who was actively avoiding eye contact, but she knew that he had been the one behind this little rearrangement. 

Despite her disapproval, Aelin sat and smoothed her dress as she did. Moments went by with silence, people around her chattering away. She tried and failed to meet the eyes or Orlon, instead she had the pleasure of Aedion laughing at her expense. She wasn’t going to give Aedion the upper hand tonight, so she decided to suck it up and turn to Rowan. 

“You clean up nicely.” As if he had not been dressed to the nines the first time she met him. 

“As do you, princess.” 

Silence. 

“Did you find your way to your rooms? The castle can be… large.” 

Since when had she become such a bumbling fool? 

“I did. I also had the chance to inspect the training facilities.” 

“Oh? And were they to your liking?” 

“They’re adequate. If you would be up to it we could use them tomorrow?” She hadn’t lied when she had told him she had never trained with anyone before. The only person had been her instructor, who had never really trained with her, more like watched and criticised. Her flame was more a party trick than anything, she wasn’t sure it would be that impressive using it in front of Rowan. But despite her reservations about the mating bond and him, she still agreed. 

Dinner went smoothly, their conversation remained strictly polite; talking about the food, the wine, the dessert. All too soon it was over and Aelin was thankful to be excused. 

She returned to her room and jumped at the sight of someone on her bed. Her flame immediately sprung from her fingers and she edged closer, only to sigh in relief when she saw Sam.

Sam?

“What the hell are you doing in here?” She quickly shut the door and lit the few candles and fireplace. 

“I needed to see you. Lysandra said you weren’t going to be able to see me for a few weeks… so I asked her to help me here.” 

“If someone catches you…” 

“I know, but I had to see you.” 

She stepped out of the slippers she wore and undid her hair letting it fall down her back. 

“You can’t be here Sam. I’m serious.” 

“I’ve never seen you dressed liked that. You look royal.” He smirked. 

“That’s because I am royal you fool.” She threw a cushion at him and then collapsed onto the sofa. “What is it Sam, that couldn’t wait until I came to you?” 

“I wanted to know if you’d thought my offer over again? I’ve found someone who will take over the library. And there’s a ship leaving for the Southern Continent in four weeks. It’s enough time to sort everything out, for you to—“ 

“I can’t, Sam.” 

He stopped where he had been pacing by the fire. “You… can’t?” 

Aelin’s body went hot and her pulse quickened. She loved Sam, but when she looked at him… there was no buzz. No spark. Not like what she had felt with Rowan. And she knew that was because of the mating bond… but it still meant something. Hadn’t she always known it was never going to be forever with Sam? Hadn’t her parents said the same thing to her? 

“I want to run away with you. Or I did… last night. But what would happen in sixty years? When you’re ageing and I’m still what I am now. What happens when you’re gone? I can’t come crawling back asking for the throne. Not after abandoning it like that. I have responsibilities, you know this.” She stood now. “My life is here Sam, it will be forever.” She turned to face him fully. “I love you, but my answer is no.” She choked on the last words. 

He stood there, staring into the flames. Neither of them said a word, the only sound came from the crackling of logs. 

Sam finally turned to her. “I had really hoped that you would give it all up. That what you told me about wanting to be free, wanting to live your own life, was true. That you would realise that your love for me was stronger than your love for this.” He gestured to the room, the palace, Terrasen. “I would give up everything for you Aelin. I would lose everything if it meant we could be together.” 

She was crying now. 

“And deep down, I thought maybe you would give up your immortality. Give up that side of you so we could have a normal life together.” Sam wiped tears from his own face, but still she said nothing. “I was never going to be good enough, was I?” 

Her heart cracked at his words. “You are enough Sam. But my country, my kingdom… it will always come first.” 

“Does the fact I would give it all up mean nothing to you?” 

“Of course it does! But I never asked you to do that. I told you from the beginning this would be temporary. We would continue as long as we could, but one day I would have to step up and be the person I have to be. For my kingdom, for my family… and for me.” 

He slid his hands down his face, despair in his eyes. “I should have known better.” 

“What’s that even supposed to mean?” She was angry now. 

“It means that I was right when I first met you. You are spoiled and selfish and only care for yourself. Maybe it’s a good thing it’s ending now. I’ll save myself the pain in the future.” 

His words stung. Sam had been angry at her before, but he had never been cruel. A knock at the door had them both freezing. 

“Aelin? Is everything okay?” Rowan. What was he doing here?

“Everything is fine.” Sam was staring at her, then at the door, trying to put it together. She didn’t take her eyes of Sam, he stared right back. Neither of them said a word until Sam gave a slight shake of his head and made off through the balcony doors and out into the night. She didn’t look away even as Rowan knocked at the door once more. 

“You might as well come in.” She sighed. 

The door creaked open, slowly at first, and then wider as he let himself in. Rowan left the door ajar, letting her know he had good intentions, whatever they were.

“What are you doing here?” She glanced once more at the balcony doors, sure that Sam was far enough away.

“I could... smell something was wrong.”

Right. The Fae senses. 

“It’s nothing, just a sad book.” 

“I’d believe that if it wasn’t just you I could scent.” 

He could smell Sam. 

“Rowan…”

“I have no claim over you, so what you do is none of my business. But I had to check you weren’t in danger.” Her heart panged in her chest, warmth spreading at his protectiveness. She returned to the sofa and motioned for Rowan to join her. She beckoned the guard outside and requested tea for them both. She could see Rowan’s hesitation as he debated whether this was a good idea.

“The door will remain open, no funny business, don’t worry.” She gave him her signature grin and he relaxed as he came to sit next to her. They had been closer at dinner, but the intimacy of them both being in her room… it was new and strange to her. Sam had never been in here. 

“Was the male…” He trailed off.

“He’s my… was my—“ she cringed at the next words. “Was my lover.” 

He flinched at the word, she felt his jealousy even if he did not fully show it.  

“You’re not planning on courting me for these few weeks just to reject me?”

“That was not what I was planning on doing.” Aelin continued. “To be honest, I didn’t know what I was planning to do. I’ve never been in this situation before.” She picked some lint from her skirts. 

“You loved him?” 

She gave a small nod. “He asked me leave with him, to runaway. Head to the Southern Continent, to build a life there. I didn’t give him an answer, so he came here to get one.” She didn’t dare look Rowan in the eyes. “I told him I couldn’t do it, and he said some things… and then he left.” 

“Did he hurt you?” A guttural growl. 

“No! Not physically. He would never hurt me. He’s just upset that I said no, that’s all.” 

Aelin’s own voice was low, sad. The maid entered the room carrying a tray of tea and sweets, she placed it on the low table in front of them and gave a small curtsey before scurrying away. 

“Do they always look terrified around you?” He picked up a cup and poured some of the herbal tea in. 

“They do not look terrified!” She swatted his arm. “My maids love me, I let them eat sweets with me and I always give them gifts on holidays.” 

Rowan’s eyes glittered with laughter, his body relaxing into the sofa. “Well, she looked like she couldn’t get away fast enough.” 

“If she looked terrified it’s because you’re in here looking grumpy.” Rowan barked a laugh and Aelin could’ve sworn it was one of the loveliest sounds she had ever heard. 

Rowan stayed for another two cups of tea and then politely excused himself, but promising Aelin that he would see her tomorrow for training. 

She went to sleep that night, not thinking of her fight with Sam, and the way that they had ended; but of Rowan and those pine green eyes. 

[inkweaver22-blr]

Welcome to chapter nine! This one was meant to just be another filler with one of my own AU’s, but Tang just had to be introspective and have a moment of character growth. Hope you enjoy!

EDIT: This chapter has been edited to include some new info dropped on the same day I originally posted this! More info in the End Notes!

AO3 Link

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Scattered Cicadas - Chapter Nine: Rocks and Roles

Tang knows how to act. That doesn't mean he likes to play every part.

----------

Tang liked to think of himself as a decent actor, at least back in the original timeline. He had been part of the theater class in high school and telling stories required a bit of a dramatic flair if you wanted to keep your audience entertained. Convincing Pigsy he was a popular food critic hadn’t been too hard back then.

The many cycles he had been through had certainly helped polish his skill into a genuine talent. That one time where he and everyone else had been professional actors playing the roles of themselves from the original timeline as part of a show had especially allowed him to hone himself to a greater degree than before.

Being stuck jumping through time had practically made it a necessity.

It wasn’t that Tang enjoyed what was essentially lying to his family. It was more for their protection. He had almost broken the “No Interference” rule a few times when he hadn’t properly reacted to events that, while shocking or upsetting to his family, were simply part of his routine by now. He couldn’t allow the repetitive nature of the cycles to make him slip up and potentially cause more harm by being confronted by his lack of surprise or fear.

So he acted. He gasped at all the right moments or screamed in fear when in danger. Every laugh, every sigh of exasperation, every freak out over something related to Wukong was perfectly performed so as to not to raise suspicion. So long as the proper reaction occurred in response to the correct effect, everything went smoothly.

It wasn’t too hard or taxing as he never needed to fake his enjoyment of being around his family. Luckily for him, he also didn’t have to act exactly as he had been in the original timeline, or he may have gone insane from the monotony of it.

The cycles where his background was entirely rewritten were blessings in disguise, really. They were new. Fresh experiences for Tang to have and not have to work as hard to realistically react to.

He treated them like a method acting exercise. The new memories as part of Tang’s new backstory was the motivation for the ‘character’ he was playing. He didn’t have to fully adhere to them, but they certainly helped him play the role provided to him for the cycle.

He still disliked playing the villain however.

It happened a few times before already. The most notable had been when Zhu Bajie was in the role of Sun Wukong as MK’s mentor.

Tang shuddered at the memory of that timeline.

Saying that version of him had been unhinged was severely downplaying the many atrocities he had performed on both himself and others. Committing suicide to erase his name from the books of the dead, killing demons to absorb their lifeforce, and cutting open his own chest to manually insert the gem holding that lifeforce into himself for power were simply the tamer actions he had committed.

He supposed that heartbreak, jealousy, and internalized insecurities could drive even the most benign people to madness so long as they properly justified their actions to themselves.

It had been the first time in quite a while that Tang seriously considered intentionally breaking the interference rule and just running off to live in solitude for the entire cycle. Getting “redeemed” had been one of the most difficult things he had tried to pull off.

Tang dodged a swipe from the Monkey King’s staff as he was brought back into the present.

He was the villain once again this cycle. Luckily though, he was much less of a threat to his family this time around.

He was replacing Red Son as the demon child of Demon Bull King and Princess Iron Fan.

Tang, Son of the Earth.

He wasn’t the only one who was switched around. Pigsy, who went by Bajie, was a human who had become Wukong’s successor. MK was a boar demon who ran the noodle shop. Red Son was a scientist and engineer who frequented the restaurant.

It was almost an opposite reflection of the cycle he had just been musing about.

“You’ll have to do better than that, noodle boy,” Tang taunted as he swung his arms to pull chunks of stone from the ground, his hands and the Earth he controlled both glowing with a golden-yellow light.

He supposed that it made sense for him to have some sort of elemental power if he was this timeline’s Red Son. Earth fit as he had certainly mellowed out over the course of the cycles, becoming more focused and self assured. His original self would have most certainly been associated with air with how flighty he had been.

Tang made sure to keep his full concentration as he attacked Bajie. Earth may be the element of the sturdy, but it had the potential to be much more volatile than fire. It was easy to let loose and cause a catastrophic earthquake. It took precision to control smaller pieces of rock without causing too much collateral damage.

Bajie batted away the earthen projectiles with ease and rushed into an opening Tang had intentionally left. He had to do his best to not rely on the fighting skills he had from previous cycles and use only what his memories knew when playing a villain. Otherwise he’d easily beat the fledgling hero and that certainly would be treated as interfering.

Tang winced as the staff connected with his ribs and sent him flying. He coughed as he pulled himself up, holding his injured side as he glared at the now smirking Bajie.

“How’s that for better!”

“This isn’t over,” Tang cried out dramatically. He activated his powers, this time summoning a whirlwind of sand to teleport away.

Another scene as the villain successfully played out.

----------

Tang sat in his workshop, calculating the specific size of a rune circle he would need.

It seemed that similarly to how Red Son was a genius that incorporated magic into science, this version of Tang was one who incorporated science into magic. Not a big distinction, but important in how the process worked. It still took an impressive amount of knowledge on both subjects to work them together in the end.

Setting his pen down to take a break, Tang looked around as he stretched. He caught his reflection in a nearby piece of metal machinery he had been fiddling with and examined himself once again.

He didn’t look too different from his human self, his face remaining the same. His hair was now a dark brown with yellow highlights and his glasses were much smaller. The biggest difference were the bull horns sticking out of the side of his head.

He didn’t mind them too much, but having to give up any pull over shirt for button downs was a hassle.

Looking at his horns lead the demon scholar to think about his parents in this timeline.

Demon Bull King and Princess Iron Fan.

Tang frowned as he recalled the less than comforting welcome he had received after returning from his defeat. The disapproving dismissal from his father and scathing taunts from his mother had been demoralizing. It would have hurt more if he hadn't had the years of time jumping behind him.

If this was how Red Son was commonly treated, it was no wonder he worked hard in everything he did just to gain a scrap of approval and praise.

And yet he knew they loved each other. The moments he noticed didn’t happen often, but he could tell that his parents held some affection for him, and he obviously cared for them. He just didn’t understand why they acted so cruelly to one another.

Was it a demon thing? Were they afraid that by showing their love they were showing weakness?

That was certainly possible, but Tang disagreed with the sentiment. He had been through enough cycles to see that love made one stronger. It wasn’t the weakness their enemies thought it was.

Tang was already planning on becoming redeemed in this cycle. It hurt to think his parents would disown him, but what if that didn’t have to happen?

He thought about that one specific cycle and how he had become so twisted. All of it could have been avoided had his past self simply let go of his long held beliefs and went with Bajie.

Now he just had to make two powerful demons do just that.

Tang was an amazing actor.

He also had many years of watching the people around him and knew most of them almost better than they knew themselves.

His current parents were no exception.

He could see the potential for a loving and healthy family, buried just beneath the surface.

It would take some work, but he was sure he could unearth it and polish that potential until it shined.

With renewed energy, Tang pulled out a blank scroll and began planning.

He had a family to save.

----------

Welcome to what I’m calling the Noodle Swap AU! It is named that way because the only change is that the pairs that make up the two most popular noodle ships (SpicyNoodles and FreeNoodles) swap places!

Shout out to @winterpower98 for their amazing Actor AU and Dad Swap AU mentioned in this chapter! Go check them out!

Yes, yes, I know I’ve basically made Tang here Terra from Teen Titans. Most people would give him Air as an element, but 1) we already have an Air user in Princess Iron Fan and 2) Tang has changed quite a bit since the start of this Time Hopping experience, as he states himself in the chapter.

I do genuinely believe there’s a loving family hidden somewhere underneath all the cruelty the DBK crew throw at each other. It’s already been hinted that Red Son will get a redemption arc in the show, but I want one for his parents too.

That’s all for now! See you in the next chapter!

:IMPORTANT EDIT!!!!:

There's been a few paragraphs changed and added to include the new canon lore for Tang in the Dad Swap AU! Go check out @kitkat1003's absolutely ASTOUNDING work, When the Tide Pulls Away and the Earth Sharpens to Steel! It is INCREDIBLE and if it was finished, you'd absolutely know there would be an entire chapter dedicated to it here.

[pikapeppa]

Year-end Writer’s Round-Up: the 2020 edition

Tagged a million years ago by @mythicaitt​ and @lostinfantasies38​ - thanks friends! I have finally put aside a chunk of time for this, since I am a nerd who likes to get accurate calculations. 

I will preface this by saying it’s been an insane year, and I know many people’s creativity was sucked dry by, well, everything. I find my emotional escape/comfort in writing fic, so I just... I dunno, went nuts with writing this year. To that end, I’ll keep most of this post below a cut for those who don’t want to see my “stats”, but with an open invitation to participate for ANYONE who does want to share their writing achievements for the year, and a tag for those writers that I know for sure were active this year: @crackinglamb​ @barbex​ @solas-disapproves​ @elveny​ @alyssalenko​ @nug-juggler​ @musetta3​ @cartadwarfwithaheartofgold​ @iarollane​ @in-arlathan​ @charlatron​ @queen-kass-the-writer​ - NO PRESSURE TO PARTICIPATE OR TO READ THIS AT ALL, THOUGH.

Word count and smut count table (i.e. NERD ALERT):

(Here’s a masterlist of all my fic, if any of the fics in that list strike anyone’s fancy and they want to find and check ‘em out.)

There are a couple of things missing from this word count that I only posted on Tumblr, a couple of Solas/Nare drabbles and a piece of Orsino/Hawke smut, but I’m too lazy to track those down right now. And I have another unposted chapter of Inadvisable that’s about 10k words… ANYWAY, MOVING ON.

New things I tried this year:

I jumped headfirst into a few Dragon Age rarepairs this year! I’ve always loved rarepairs and have particularly enjoyed writing them for Horizon Zero Dawn in the past, so it was a pleasure to take on a few this year:

Felassan x Lavellan in The Love That Grows From Violence

Sten x Yara Mahariel in Fall Into The Tide

Samson x Roman Hawke for my soulmate @schoute​ - a ship that I never even saw coming and that hit me like a ton of bricks in the feels.

I also took the plunge into theorizing and sorting through Big Lore this year for Dragon Age — something I’ve avoided doing for years. I usually don’t like doing very deep dives because I’m a canon-compliant sort of girl, and the idea of getting attached to a theory that might end up being wrong makes me feel itchy. But when I started writing a Felassan-centered fic, I had no choice but to try and figure out the big lore since YA BARK-EATING BOYFRIEND KNOWS THINGS. I spent 10+ hours sorting through DA meta, both canon and fanon, to try and come up with something cohesive for that fic that feels as canon-compliant as possible, so that was definitely a cliff I didn’t mean to jump off of, LOL.

I also took a jump into writing a fic with three simultaneous and interconnected relationships in Inadvisable, my modern university AU with @elbenherzart​, which includes relationships for Solas, Abelas and Felassan. I was super excited but SCARED to do this: how to keep all three relationships interesting and exciting when the narrative keeps moving and flowing between the three relationships and the six characters who all know each other in different ways? Luckily, I had the wonderful Elbenherzart cheering me on and encouraging me with all the BEAUTIFUL ART she’s done for the fic, and I’ve been really enjoying it!

Fic I spent the most time on: 

Um, it’s probably a tie between two fics: The Love That Grows From Violence (Felassan x Lavellan) just because of that Big Lore deep dive, or Lovers In A Dangerous Time (Fenris the Inquisitor), which I finished earlier this year and took a long time just by virtue of the fic length and THE AMOUNT OF FEELINGS I HAVE FOR FENRIS AND RYNNE HAWKE.

Fic I spent the least time on: 

Wake Up, a quick oneshot featuring Varric and Solas, which I keysmashed in a couple of hours after the most recent DA4 trailer was released. 

Favourite thing I wrote:

Oh my god. Everything?? Writing is my escape and my pride and joy, so I love everything I write. All my rarepairs were absolute delights this year. Finishing Lovers In A Dangerous Time was bittersweet since I now kind of feel like I can’t write any further Fenris/Rynne until DA4 comes out. But Felassan has become my darling toward the end of this year and I’m thrilled to have brought a handful of wonderful readers down the Felassan rabbit hole with me. 

Favourite thing I read:

… I… have once again failed and read basically nothing this year. I started to read Pressure Point by 17734 on AO3 and really enjoyed it for a few chapters before I just… ran out of steam. Not because of the fic, because it genuinely was great —  the smut in the first chapter just about killed me, STG — but because I realized this year that, with very few exceptions, I don’t have enough emotional space to invest in fics with long intricate plots. I’m a fucking goblin who just likes to read smut, so I lose interest quickly if the fic isn’t strongly smut/romance-centered. 

TO THAT END, I do have a couple of smutfic recs:

Force of Nature, a Stenwarden oneshot by @minionripley: Maker save me, this was soOoOoO good and in-character for StennySten.

Provided It Tied You Down First by JadeLavellan on AO3: Solas and Trevelyan go to a Tevinter sex party for recon reasons. Oh my god, guys, IT’S SO GOOD.

Writing goals for next year:

Honestly? I’m not gonna make any. I’ll just go where the winds of inspiration take me, and where the winds of others’ whispered suggestions take me as well. 

To that end, I have to make a few shoutouts to people who have inspired me this year, either with their art or suggestions or encouragement (read: ENTHUSIASTIC SCREAMING): @schoute​ @elbenherzart​ @whatomen​, without whom a huge chunk of my fic this year would not exist; and @lethendralis-paints​​ @ashalle-art​ @slushrottweiler-blog​ who gifted me with beautiful fan art this year and made me want to weep. LOVE YOU GUYS SO MUCH. 

Wishing everyone a safe and happy new year filled with love, warmth, and most of all, with hope. If anyone else wants to join in and share their achivements, please do and tag me so I can see what you’ve been up to!

- Love from your friendly neighbourhood Pikapeppa xoxo

[uwua3]

Hello! Can you write something for Muku helping Juza impress his crush? Thank you!

thank you so much for requesting, anon !! i hope to make you proud with this piece ٩( >w< )و suddenly today, i was overcome with a charming concept for this prompt and i am so happy! please enjoy, and if you’d like a continuation, let me know!

summary: the crown prince ascending to the throne would be nothing without his number one advisor

warnings: arranged marriage, classism, disease, dueling, fear of touching, fighting, military, monarchy, parental deaths/issues, swords

author’s note: you know, no one said to do a royal au but here i am! this will be an enemies to lovers prompt, so please enjoy :D have fun, juza loves you !! ♡

word count: 6,220

music: eyes blue like the atlantic, pt. 2 – sista prod, powfu, alec benjamin, & rxseboy

the crown prince and his advisor.

🌻👑🍁🍰 sakisaka muku + hyodo juza

“absolutely not.”

it doesn’t take much for first in line, prince feared across many nations, and legend in the making, hyodo juza, to not cooperate with his royal court

an arranged marriage, was expectedly one of the things that made him incompetent

“ju–chan,” first advisor muku started, ignoring the snickers of the much older men around him at the childhood nickname and juza’s sudden flustered expression, “you would be a fool to not agree to this arrangement.”

“me? the fool?!” juza huffed, his voice on the verge of raising as he narrowed his eyes at his cousin with the sharp threat of a death sentence. muku sighed, knitting his eyebrows together as he patiently tapped his fingers upon the round table

(leave it to his older, much more influential, and wealthier cousin to be incredibly difficult to work with)

“yes, you know akizakura is the rising power this century. they’re challenging societal norms and making every other monarchy uneasy with their progressiveness. you and them together would have a shocking power play over every single nation on this map.”

muku used his feather quill to refer to the aged map laid out, gesturing as if to say “this could all be yours if you played your cards right”. juza was about to fight back, but bit his tongue, nearly slouching in his seat to contemplate before straightening with muku’s pointed glare

(seriously... juza was the older one?)

“i have no desire to be a dictator.” juza finally spat, turning his head away towards the window and closed his eyes. the rest of the court bristled at this bold, unambitious statement but muku solemnly nodded

after all, it was the dying king’s one true goal to conquer all, not juza’s

“if i may say, prince juza, the heir to the throne—”

“i wish to hear nothing about this so called heir. they mean nothing to me.”

silence plagued the court, the somewhat out of touch yet logical advisors sharing disapproving looks of juza’s childish behavior. muku did his best not to roll his eyes at the crowd, instead plastering a neutral expression

it seemed like most of the times, the whole kingdom forgot juza was a child. just a boy suddenly forced to uphold his responsibilities with his father’s slow demise

“shall we reconvene tomorrow?” muku suggested, to which juza nodded. the court quickly went up and left, shooting curious and nosy glances at muku who remained in his seat. when everyone parted ways and the guard by the door confirmed there were no eavesdroppers, muku quietly pushed out his chair and moved to stand by his cousin’s side

for a while, no one said anything. until, juza’s tense posture slumped and he buried his face into his hands, trying his best to keep it all together even with no one to witness his defenses down

“i wish... father wasn’t so ill. i shouldn’t be here, i don’t want to be here.” juza declared, the words muffled by his palms. advisor muku gently placed a hand upon the crown prince’s shoulder, patting it slightly with a sympathetic tone to his words

“i know, i’m sorry. but, you will be a great king for the people of higanbana.”

before juza could ask how he knew for sure, muku just fixed the kingdom’s red spider lily pendant to make sure it was straight. it was the royal family’s heirloom, a universally recognized sign this was the son of a highly respected, pure bloodline

“ju–chan, have i ever led you astray?”

yes, many times, juza thought, reminiscing back on when they were kids. but, he didn’t say any of that, he instead shook his head solemnly

hyodo juza, first in line, prince feared across many nations, legacy in the making, was only eighteen when he would be coronated as king. the youngest king in all of higanbana history, all because his father was dying

and, he needed to secure his ascension through marriage to a complete stranger

but rest assured, muku, number one advisor, cousin to the crown prince, wise beyond all, was surprisingly relentless. becoming the new upcoming king’s right hand man had changed him for the better, preventing him from letting his insecurity and indecisiveness show its true colors

sure, he was still the scared coward who screamed unlike a man and didn’t have the natural class of royalty, but putting on a front was worth it to save juza from losing all support inside and out

the abrupt news that the oldest son of the hyodo family was soon to be hailed as king was, a surprise, to the townsfolk. many who were comfortable and simply used to king hyodo’s reign were not vocally against it, luckily enough. it was more a thing to gossip about than anything, but the royal family never particularly enjoyed the rumor mill

unfortunately, being coronated as a... single king was a pressing matter to all of the people, apparently. no king in history just rose to power without an influential and powerful partner by their side, it would leave vulernability due to the limited allies

especially what would remain of them, considering some kingdoms may break ties with the hyodos since juza and his father were... very different people

so, as said before, muku was relentless. continously insisting that this marriage contract was the best possible option for juza, that no other heir could even come close. juza didn’t want to believe it even if it was true, considering his stubborn nature

it took many, many bribes of tea parties and constant challenging duels for him to admit defeat

it was perhaps a tiring match that afternoon before juza exhaled sharply through his nose, moving to sheath his sword as he waved the white flag. muku, also surprisingly quick and agile on his feet with a weapon, managed to suppress a “told you so” grin at the look of exasperation

“fine, fine! i’m tired of fighting—” juza was not a major fan of dueling whatsoever, even if he was blessed with the physical proportions to do so easily

before muku could jump up in relief, juza sent a stern glare with no malice towards his cousin’s way. the sword hit the sheath, making a loud cutting noise throughout the empty, private training grounds

“but, i want to meet them first. then, i’ll decide to marry or not.”

muku knew this was the best he was going to get, and had the private secretary immediately pen a letter toward’s akizakura. shortly afterwards, a request for the heir to visit was accepted

you were also first in line, an intimidating but just political figure, and also a legend in the making. you were the talk of the town, to say the least

but, you sure didn’t feel like it

you anxiously tapped your foot, feeling seasick from how long this boat journey had already been. you had been invited by the higanbara kingdom to “visit” to “discuss political alliances and ideas to better serve the people”, though anyone with a brain could see straight through that lie

your parents intended on promising you to some eighteen year old hyodo hotshot, someone you’ve never even met!

at first, you were extremely demanding for them to consider changing their minds, that you didn’t need... a man... to help you rule the world. men would only hold you back, they’d do nothing good for you, anyways!

but, you knew the future of akizakura was in your hands. your parents were strong, but slowly, their old age would catch up to them and they needed to protect the famly legacy. you were the next expected heir, considering how active you’ve been in the government since you could read and write

though, no one exactly stated a marriage contract came along with power

you didn’t exactly know what higanbara looked like, but you’ve heard... rumors, about the family that ruled it all. the hyodos were an imposing force, spreading their control far and wide with unfathomable military power and merciless tactics

you couldn’t imagine what the crown prince was like. how, barbaric, he must be. must’ve been an inhumane and unreasonable fighter that took everyones’ heads with him

lucky for you, you were a trained fighter as well who would never let a man even have a sliver of control over your dead body

“your royal highness, we are here in higanbara.” the captain announced, followed by the sound of the ship’s horn. thank the gods, or you might have swam there yourself considering how rocky sea travels were

fixing your appearance, you masked your face in a stone cold expression, showing you were all business without the supervision of your parents. you were your own person, you didn’t need to be ordered around by some man

as the ship reached port, you noticed a set of figures at the foggy dock. higanbara was... dismal. it was all shades of grey, like there was no life. the oceans were a glittering silver, as if there were thousands of treasures waiting to be discovered. and at the port, was a sight to behold

you stepped onto the creaky wood cautiously, looking around before you noticed a stoic face peering down at you. perhaps a beat too late from how much he was staring, he then offered his hand without ever saying a word

you ignored it, knowing you didn’t need it at all. but from the looks of it, they were calloused, scarred, large. hands of a warrior—his eyebrows rose slightly in surprise at your blatant rejection. before he could speak, you heard someone else introduce the kingdom

“your royal highness, welcome to higanbara!” you heard a gentle, but enthusiastic, voice from behind the tall man who helped you on land. you turned to see a rather short, pink–haired royal with a shaky but elegant smile. you couldn’t help but smile at the boy

(you didn’t notice juza’s subconcscious quirk of his lips at your guard coming down, before he looked away with his ears red and mind confused. why did he do that?)

“thank you...?” you trailed off, awaiting an introduction before the pink royal dropped into a hurried but somewhat graceful bow, coming up with a surprise rose. you had no idea where it came from, causing you to let out a surprised laugh. higanbara was filled with many surprises, apparently

“i am his royal highness’ first advisor, sakisaka muku, it is a pleasure.” muku smiled pleasantly, but you noticed his eyes lingered on the way you stood oddly close with the crown prince

you tried to step back casually as if there was nothing wrong, but you almost stumbled off the edge of the dock. unluckily, juza was fast and immediately wrapped his arm around your waist, keeping you close as he froze under the sudden attention at your close proximity

“let go.” you demanded and your tone was ice cold like the waters

“please... be careful—” juza mumbled, his grip strong before you pushed him off, scowling with a sharp glare his way

“let go!” you yelled, drawing attention as you glared daggers at higanbara’s crown prince. you couldn’t believe it, did all men just think they could grip you like that? as if you needed help?!

“do not touch me, i did not give you permission.” you cursed, shocking nearly everyone as you brushed off your clothes. juza blinked, taken back before he frowned, his eyebrows furrowed

“but, if i hadn’t, you would’ve fell into the water—”

“then, let me fall! i can swim!”

when you met his eyes, he was very clearly frustrated. the awe of meeting you had worn off, and juza was certain he’d make an enemy out of your stubborn pride and rude attitude right off the bat

muku intervened, laughing awkwardly as if a newcomer didn’t just yell at higanbara’s crown prince. stepping between you two, he seemed to communicate something with his eyes to juza who suppressed the need to storm off

“i am first in line, crown prince hyodo juza. a... pleasure.” juza faltered, his tone superficial and void of any genuine pleasure. he bowed anyways, his back rigid and yellow eyes analyzing your every move. he must’ve been a battle tactician with how observant he was

you didn’t do anything back, just crossed your arms and averted your eyes. “i know who you are, you know who i am. can we move on?”

juza was about to impulsively snap back before muku agreed, staying between you two despite the common courtesy of trailing behind royalty. the guards set at the port parted on command, yelling back “yes sir!” at juza’s order to march back to the castle

was this a power move? to intimidate you and make you go in shock over juza’s military background? two could play at this game

you stood taller, ignoring his gaze as you hurried forward, not wanting to be beside the man who just randomly touched you without your consent. not to mention, the audacity to linger! how inappropiate!

juza stared after you, and looked over his shoulder towards muku, visually confused over how offstandish you were

muku just sighed. this was going to be a long, long two weeks of akizakura’s ascending heir in higanbara

it was an understatement to say you and juza got off on the wrong foot. you never allowed just anyone to touch you randomly out of no where. you weren’t some clumsy person in distress, you were a leading figure in your kingdom, for goodness sake! you easily could’ve fixed your footing, stood back up straight, and moved on

juza was rather peeved at your reaction. you didn’t even take his hand like a polite royal would! didn’t thank for him for saving you from the ocean and had the audacity to curse him out like he was some commoner in front of his own troops. juza felt embarrassed from how low he was treated, you had no respect for him or higanbara

muku, was tired. when other nobles whispered about how out of the ordinary and eccentric you were and how strange akizakura’s customs were, he didn’t expect having to save his crown prince from a near beating

you had guts and nerve, just like juza. maybe, you two had more than meets the eye, but unfortunately, both people were stubborn, prideful, and arrogant privileged kids who didn’t want to see the other side

so throughout the first half of your stay, muku felt more like a babysitter than an advisor. it took everything in his power to keep you two from physically fighting each other in front of the royal circle

you two seemed to disagree on everything. while you were an “all or nothing” type of pefson, who went extreme on every suggestion you had and was willing to risk everything for a better future, juza was... the opposite

unlike his bold and brash father who would’ve gotten along just fine with you, juza wanted new change. he was always playing the devil advocate, pointing out flaws you hadn’t taken account for before. but, he was hesitant, wanting to take it slow, and ease into the plan than go head first

it made both your tactics and strategies clash and nothing was getting done. but muku, wise and relentless muku, knew it was more than just childish arguments at the round table. it was the slowly building tension between you two ever since that one bad first impression

and perhaps, the intense pressure from both sides to accept this arranged marriage for the sake of both kingdoms. it was too much on teens savoring their last few years of youth

and just like before, muku knew what needed to happen in order for someone (most likely juza) to give up their defenses and say something

you elegantly strode into the training grounds early in the morning, holding the first advisor’s personal note in your hand as you looked around. you were scheduled to meet muku, in a neutral place to get the overview of today’s meeting without juza’s involvement

or, so you thought

you heard a scuff of shoes and a quick “damn, sakisaka” behind you. whipping around, you came face to face with a sleepy juza, who’s eyes immediately widened and took a few steps back. it seemed like you caught him off guard, and he held a similar note in his hand as well

it didn’t take a genius to figure out what muku had done, as you huffed and placed your hands on your hips. juza straightened his posture and looked down at you, expressing that he wished he could be anywhere but with you

“hyodo—” you started, to which juza pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes. “that’s my father, i’m juza.” you continued anyways, ignoring his sharp pointed look

“are you here to fight with me again? perhaps, make a fool of me again?” you accused, pointing a finger at his chest as seethed. juza rolled his eyes, visibily frustrated as he threw his hands up, planning his escape already

“i have no business with you here. i will depart now.” juza forced out in a neutral tone, as if you two hadn’t been at each other’s throats the past week. before juza could spin on his heel and take his leave, you grabbed a sword near by and the sound of it leaving its sheath made him stop in his tracks

“you. me. right now.” you demanded and juza let out a humorless laugh. you were in over your head if you could think you could beat a hyodo at a duel. looking at the sky, he noticed it would be quite a bit of time until the official start of his day as crown prince. maybe, he could spare a bit of time

“at your service, your royal highness.” juza mocked, obnoxiously bowing that made your eye twitch at how insufferable he was

“take your pick. regardless, you’ll lose by my hand.”

juza chose his normal practice sword, the hilt engraved with his name and bore the spider design of the red lily. it had the grandeur of being a ceremonial sword, which you scoffed at. ugh, rich kids

you took the one closest to you and juza expected you two would walk to the middle, circle each other to see who would make the first move. he should’ve known you weren’t exactly the waiting type, because the moment he stepped into the ring, you hit first

luckily, juza whipped his sword up and the metal clashed with yours, the sound echoing in the courtyard. that was the start of the longest duel juza’s ever had

used to muku’s dexterity, juza had to find out the hard way you were much more of a strength fighter. you took him by surprise most times, with forceful and somewhat vengeful attacks. yet, juza was a formidable opponent. he had learned from the best after all, and this was one of the few duels he had the goal to try at

you smirked when juza nearly lost his footing, not reaching out to catch him by any means and holding your hands up. “see, i respect people’s private space and don’t touch them without permission.”

juza swung back with much more force than normal, which you hurriedly parried. the contact of metal rang in your ears as juza gained the upper hand, looming over you with distaste

“you would’ve drowned if i let you fall!”

“you knew i didn’t take your hand for a reason, i refuse to let a man touch me!”

you pushed back but he was like a rock, unmoving and resilient. he seemed to contemplate something before putting his sword down, nearly sheathing it before stopping, making sure to meet your eye

“i’m sorry.”

you blinked, taken back. was that an apology? from a hyodo?

“i understand you have your reasonings to hate physical contact, and i respect that. by no means did i mean to make you uncomfortable.” juza explained, feeling a weight lifted off his shoulders as he finally found a time to apologize properly

“i wouldn’t have touched you unless i knew it was for your own safety, i’m sorry.” juza finished and you thought about it, before putting your own sword down with a heavy sigh

“i’m... also sorry. i knew you had good intentions, but i blew up because...” you seemed to think some more before exhaling. “i don’t need a man to save me, don’t think i need you or anything. i’m a perfectly capable, independent person.”

juza related to how your pride blinded your anger, and nodded. you two seemed to reach a mutual understanding and juza ducked his head, lowering it so it’d be easier to talk to you away from the castle that was waking up

“i did not mean to insult your character. i’m sure you are a whole person who does not need saving, it was not my intention.”

without another word, you moved past him, acting as if you were going to put your weapon away. instead, you quickly knocked his sword out of his loose hands, smiling innocently as if nothing happened

“i believe i win.”

“a dirty play, mind you.”

“a win is a win.”

“a victory is nothing if not honorable.”

you looked over your shoulder with a curious look, as if you were really seeing juza for the first time. you expected a burly man who would burn down nations just for a taste of godhood. instead, he seemed humble, unlike a hyodo

“hyodo—”

“i’m not my father, i am juza.” juza repeated again, without the usual bite, and you suddenly understood why juza taking the throne was big news. he was nothing like his father, this would be the ushering of a new age

hopefully, a golden age

“juza,” you said for the first time and for once, he presented a close–lipped smile that seemed void of royal duties. “i look forward to dueling you again.”

“as do i.”

“do not expect to win.”

(first advisor muku held in his squeals on the balcony adjacent to the training grounds. he typically liked to sneak up there to read and prepare for the day, but he was hiding this time to eavesdrop. looks like his plan worked!)

(when juza looked up to meet his eyes, he looked as if he knew all this time. muku nervously smiled and waved slowly, to juza’s hidden relief that he made progress)

(but... why was he so happy to see you weren’t holding a grudge against him anymore? did your opinion truly mean that much?)

the round table was much more, productive. muku liked to take credit for the riveting debates that replaced the senseless arguments, finding that both you and juza had similar goals at the end of the day, just different tactics

although there were still some very inappropiate comments here and there by your mouth, it didn’t seem personal anymore. it was clear to the court that you were intelligent, bright, and offered new perspective that no one else considered. they all knew akizakura was a force not to be reckoned with

by then, a week had passed, and it was time for the welcoming ball!

you would be introduced to the rest of the castle through a rather lame excuse to party. you knew what all of the glamarous charades and rich pleasantries were really all about, to assess if akizakura was worthy of taking their beloved crown prince’s hand. you could’ve laughed, because that was a major joke

you didn’t need to do anything, you knew you already were above and beyond what they expected. so that night as you insisted on preparing your appearance alone, you were slightly annoyed to hear a knock on your guest chambers

“go away! i said—”

“your royal highness, this is crown prince juza’s first advisor, sakisaka muku.”

you paused, looking away from the mirror and relented, letting him come in. when muku silently stepped inside and closed the door gently, he bowed with newfound confidence and sent you an easy smile that made you feel at ease

you understood why juza would want muku around, he didn’t seem like that dependable of a guy, but he was a good person through and through

“sakisaka, i remember you. you were the one who misled me to duel juza.” you said, giving him an once over before fixing your hair, staring back into the mirror. out of the corner of your eye, you noticed muku blush and he resorted to laughing awkwardly unprompted

“ah... yes—”

“and you were the one hiding in the balcony, correct?”

muku’s eyes widened, how did he get caught?! he thought only juza noticed. it was no wonder how you were such an equal match to higanbara’s crown prince, you had the same strengths and few weaknesses

“please, you do not give me enough credit.” you hummed in response, standing up and approving your final look of the day. you would wear akizakura’s kingdom colors, with the crest pinned. it would leave no question who you represented and where your loyalties lied

muku rubbed the back of his neck, letting out a breathy “haha” as the silence overcame. you slipped your kingdom ring on, watching it glint in the subtle candle light

“though, i must thank you, shouldn’t i?” you spoke in rhetorics often, muku realized. he waited for you to continue and you did, busying yourself with cleaning up your station. you had no need of maids even if you respected the profession

“without you, i wouldn’t have gotten an apology out of him. now, we’re...” you trailed off, unsure on how to finish that statement. muku hid his teasing smile, masking it as something innocent as he gratefully bowed his head, his white–gloved hand over his heart

“friends?”

you didn’t answer, instead standing tall and turning to completely face muku. he didn’t look you in the eye, but he too increased his height as if to match your authority. he was admirable for at least trying

“i must say, first advisor, juza is most fortunate to have you clean up his messes.” you half–joked, and muku nodded, agreeing seriously even if it was in jest

“however, i can promise you this. if you must contact me, do not trick me. i will not be as merciful.”

a shiver ran down muku’s spine. you truly were next in line of ruthless akizakura. but, it was a sign of respect, nonetheless. everyone was fully aware of how outstanding and remarkable you were to be the voice of the new generation

“understood, your highness. i did not come to deceit you, only to greet my cousin when he arrives.”

you tilted your head. this was news—no one could exactly tell muku and juza were cousins. really? the same bloodline?

“are you serious?”

“we get that reaction a lot.” you heard juza’s voice behind the door and you subconsciously broke your stern expression, rolling your eyes as you crossed your arms. muku noticed your shoulders dropped ever so slightly, you must’ve been comfortable around juza, then

“come in already, don’t be a creep.” you called out and juza stepped inside, stopping at the sight of you. instantly, his cheeks became flushed and he seemed like he was about to do something incredibly stupid (which he did, amused muku did not stop him)

“you—um, you, you look... nice.”

nice? you looked absolutely amazing, you already knew that. you were going to be the best dressed in the entire ballroom, that’s for sure

(but, for some reason, you were disappointed. nice? was that all you were to him? wait—why did you care?! a man’s validation of your appearance was the last thing you needed)

muku was this close to intervening before you huffed, patting down your outfit. “do i suddenly have value because i look nice?” you air–quoted “nice” and juza got even redder, looking away as if to save his dignity

“no, no. your worth isn’t based on your looks.” juza reassured and you knew he meant it. you relaxed a bit, thankful juza didn’t have the same intentions as every royal noble out there ever. muku’s eyes bounced back from you and juza continously, picking up on the signs with increasing interest

he had never seen juza slip up this much around someone before... could it be? did he actually like you now?

“look at the time! i must go help with the preparations, come down soon.” muku lied, which juza caught on fairly quickly. before he could call muku to come back, the young advisor sliped out of the chambers and ran to the main event. he succeeded in leaving you and juza alone

an uncomfortable silence set over both of you as juza examined your room out of curiousity, and you tapped your foot. you were confused, what was this feeling inside your chest? why were you suddenly so nervous?

if you were confused, you didn’t let it show on your face. instead, juza offered his arm, holding it out to you with no threat at all as he gestured his chin towards the ballroom

“would you do me the honor of letting me escort you to the ball?”

you stared at his arm, the arm you noticed was slightly shaking, whether from nerves or holding it out too long, who knew. as much as you hated to admit it, you wouldn’t want any other person escorting you

with a turn of events, you took juza’s arm and felt it tense before relaxing, giving you a chance to let go any time. he put on a rare smile, and you liked how his yellow eyes crinkled at the corners when he did

“thank you.” for trusting me, for changing your opinion about me, for giving me a chance even if i don’t deserve it, juza thought, but it was all unsaid

“sure.” you responded, but you smiled, too. it was the first time you had given him such a genuine smile, that he couldn’t help but do the same

you two moved to stand at the top of the stairs, awaiting the announcement of both your names. in the mean time, you realized juza wasn’t the hyodo you thought he was

as he escorted you down the stairs, with everyone’s eyes on you two, you two were the splitting image of graceful and threatening intimidation and power. but, it didn’t feel like that. instead, it was just you and juza, a crown prince who had a nasty temper and natural hand at sword dueling

the ball seemed to last a lifetime. so many unnecessary introductions which you put a front on. social interaction was draining, it was becoming a difficult task to shake everyone’s hands and pretended like you cared about rich people problems

so, like every celebration ever, you escaped the main event and stepped into the hyodo rose garden. mostly hues of orange, you noticed the eternal autumn that hung over the kingdom. oranges and reds entranced you as you sat at the edge of the water fountain in the middle, the constant stream distracting you from the background party noise

(“where are they?” juza asked, pulling wallflower muku aside who mainly stood by the buffet table to hide extra sweets for his cousin. muku smiled, his eyes sliding in the direction of the rose garden as juza caught on. though, juza seemed hesitant, like he was worried if he should go or not)

(“do not be a fool, ju–chan. what other time will you have to confess?” muku asked and juza nearly choked on his champagne glass, shooting a wide–eyed look at his cousin. it was as if he was asking how did he know?)

(“this is your first crush, isn’t it? luckily, the person you intend on marrying.” muku lightheartedly jested, to which juza bumped his shoulder into his slightly. “like i said, do not be a fool, ju–chan. go.”)

(juza contemplated it before nodding, slipping out of mind and out of sight. muku proudly raised his glass after him, as if to say congratulations. all that gossip with the town cupid paid off for muku, his crown prince would be hopelessly pining without him)

(all he needed to do was one last thing. first advisor made his way towards the orchestra, about to request a song)

you watched the moonlight for quite a time before you heard a rustle of leaves towards the entrance, turning your head to see juza. juza, in his orange and black uniform and red spider lily pendant. juza looked dashing beneath the stars, as he waited for you to invite him

you moved aside and juza sat down at a safe distance, stargazing along with you. the silence was comfortable, this time around. it was filled with glasses clinking together, the everpresent buzz of crickets, and flow of the water fountain

unlike your initial thoughts, you didn’t exactly mind higanbara as much as you thought you would

“the ball, is a bit much.” juza admitted, to which you agreed. “tell me about it, i don’t know how you lasted that long.” you said lightheartedly, but it seemed to make juza think as he leaned back, balancing himself by stretching his hands out on the rim of the fountain

“i... i don’t like balls, really. my father always liked them, he was the life of the party.” you noticed juza used the past tense even if his father was still alive, but you knew not for long

“he was also, born to be king. could command a whole army without fail, delivered inspiring speeches that could get the whole town riled up, was the face of his kingdom. now...”

“it’s you.”

juza nodded, as if accepting this fact for the first time. it was as clear as the full moon that night—juza was afraid he could never live up to the legacy his father would soon leave behind

“i don’t want to be king.” juza confessed in a whisper, like it could change anything. you wanted to be a monarch, but you understood juza’s struggles. he must’ve missed out on a normal childhood, like every other person born into nobility

“but, i care for the people of higanbana. i will do my best to make them proud, and to continue the legacy of this kingdom.” juza continued, clenching his fists as he did so. you turned your head to see he looked lighter, like it was something weighing him down ever since he found out

“you’ll be a good king. i have seen your plans, and you are unlike your father. you will be better.”

juza turned to stare into your eyes, searching for any sign of lies. you were telling the truth, and you were shocked at how honest you just were. but, you believed it. you believed in juza and his legacy, the incoming new golden age would arrive

“thank you, i—your people are lucky to have you.” juza said, but he seemed distant. before he could lean in, you heard the soft playing of the orchestra from far, far away

this time, you stood up and offered your hand. unlike last time however, juza accepted your hand and it was true. both your hands were calloused, scarred, large. so the two warriors wordlessly slow danced under the moonlight in the rose garden to their new favorite song

that night, juza may have not said it out loud, but both of you were too observant and smart for your own good. as he walked you to your chambers, you were the one who leaned in this time

“is this a dirty play?” you teased, inches away from his lips. juza gulped as he admired your face illuminated by the lanterns

“a win is a win.”

it was all fair, in the game of love

your two weeks had passed. it was time for you to go home, back to akizakura to make your final decision of whether to marry a hyodo or not

you let juza help you into the boat even if you didn’t need it, and said goodbye to the grey higanbana and it’s forever autumn. there was no one around since juza requested a private departure, so you let yourself smile at him

“will i see you again?” juza asked the question that had been weighing on his mind ever since that night in the rose garden. you were on the ship, but didn’t let go of his hand

“do not be a fool, juza,” you started roughly, and juza could feel his heart drop. was this the end? he didn’t want this to be the last time, he liked you

“next time, you’ll go to akizakura. there, we can duel.”

“and i’ll win.” juza confirmed and you let go, fondly rolling your eyes. as the ship departed, you suddenly rushed to the edge, cupping your hands around your mouth

“tell sakisaka i said thank you!”

of course, you found out about everything. juza just nodded and waved, watching you disappear into the horizon

juza would await your invitation to akizakura as he practiced his dueling skills with a certain matchmaker named sakisaka muku

[jasontoddiefor]

Summary: Obi-Wan has scheduled pack-bonding time. Obi-Wan also has a lot of work to do, not that Anakin and Ahsoka care. Or, pack bonding with the disaster lineage in the middle of a galactic war. AN: Happy ABO stuff with way too much background worldbuilding

“Obi-Wan,” Anakin whined. “Are you done?”

“Almost. I just need to-“ Before Obi-Wan could finish filing his report or speak his sentence, he was pulled from his desk and landed promptly in his bed where the rest of his pack was already waiting.

“-finish my report. Honestly, Anakin. Couldn’t you wait five more minutes?”

The blond Knight in question didn’t even have the decency to look ashamed or repentant for the blatant misuse of the Force. Instead, Anakin only hummed, pleased Obi-Wan was here now and nuzzled his neck. Obi-Wan supposed he should consider himself lucky that Anakin hadn’t dragged him away from his own ship, but was comfortable enough in Obi-Wan’s room. Then again, he might also just enjoy that this was Obi-Wan’s space. For all that Anakin was overly possessive when it came to his pack, he wasn’t all too picky about the space he was in. He had certainly adjusted well to living on a ship, much quicker too than other Omega Jedi.

“Anakin, I have work to do,” Obi-Wan said, a weak attempt at getting back to his desk. He already knew he wouldn’t stand up again. He’d missed his pack. He wanted to do nothing but lay here for the next days where he could keep track of them and be assured that they were healthy and safe, but duty denied him.

“No, you don’t,” Ahsoka said from Anakin’s other side. The short Padawan was almost entirely drowning in a dark brown robe Obi-Wan was fairly sure actually belonged inside his wardrobe. Togruta were just as tactile as humans if not more and Ahsoka had very much latched onto Anakin’s demands concerning pack-bonding. They were good for each other and Obi-Wan was glad Anakin had another person to fuss over. Getting Anakin to settle a little more by dumping an Initiate without a pack in front of him might have been a little underhand, Mace had certainly disapproved, but nobody could deny the result. Obi-Wan supposed he’d feel ashamed about it if Ahsoka hadn’t fit perfectly into their bonds.

“I do,” Obi-Wan sighed. “The Council-“

“Sent us here, Obi-Wan.” Anakin rolled his eyes and grabbed yet another blanket. Obi-Wan didn’t even own that many, had Anakin brought them all with him? It wouldn’t surprise Obi-Wan if Anakin had enlisted a couple of his Troopers helping him carry half a nest here. While Jedi, with the wonderful exception of Anakin, generally speaking built their nests on their own, it was very much a communal activity for the clones. Anakin had been downright delighted when he’d learned that.

“They’re not gonna expect you to be 100% available when you have gotten a scheduled pack-bonding time,” Anakin said. “Do you know how often the other packs get to see each other?”

Yes, Obi-Wan did know and he always felt a little guilty when reminded, but he couldn’t afford downtime. He was on the Council and in charge of a rather huge portion of the war effort. Any personal needs and wants had to be pushed to the back of his mind. He couldn’t be so selfish and put his own life above the millions he was sworn to protect. In moments like this Obi-Wan wished they’d have gotten more time to prepare for the war, perhaps then the long separations from the rest of his pack would have been easier to deal with.

Anakin’s Knighting had come too early. His entire generation should be able to enjoy a couple more years as Padawans and get a proper transitional period instead of being forcibly pushed into the position of General. Obi-Wan had already done plenty of solo missions without Qui-Gon before his sudden Knighting and he wasn’t sure if he would have dealt as well with the sudden separation if not for them. Anakin had adapted quickly at least, but he’d always been self-sufficient when put into life-or-death situations. He didn’t necessarily always made the smartest or least dangerous choices, but he trusted the Force and prevailed. This unshaken trust was hopefully something he passed on to Ahsoka. She was much too young for the horrors they were forced to put her through.

“I’m sorry, dear one,” Obi-Wan finally admitted defeat. “I’ll try to do better in the future.”

Anakin smiled, happy and unburdened in a way Obi-Wan hadn’t seen in a while. “Good.”

Seeing that he now didn’t have to hold up the pretense anymore, Obi-Wan gave in to his instincts. He let himself enjoy having Anakin and Ahsoka by his side again. Truthfully, they hadn’t had much time together outside of the battlefield and mission briefings. Back in the temple, they hadn’t even gotten Ahsoka settled properly. They should have had time to move her out of the Initiate room and into their small apartment or rooms actually meant to house more than two people. Right now her belongings were still stuck in boxes or haphazardly thrown into their wardrobes somewhere. Ahsoka didn’t even have a bed. He supposed they could give her Anakin’s, he never slept in there anyway nowadays, preferring to crawl into Obi-Wan’s bed, but Anakin’s entire room was basically a danger zone on his own. Her room on the Resolute was probably more a home to her than their apartment back in the Temple.

“Since we’ll be here a little longer,” Obi-Wan began to say, amusement coloring his voice as Anakin’s eyes lit up. “Give me your Padawan.”

Anakin laughed and reached over for Ahsoka, who promptly squealed in protest. “Master!”

“Nu-hu, no protesting,” Anakin replied and dumped Ahsoka in Obi-Wan’s lap.

Ahsoka crossed her arms and pouted, but when Obi-Wan began checking her for injuries, she leaned into his touch.

“I’m fine,” Ahsoka insisted. “No need to go all Alpha on me.”

Obi-Wan only hummed in acknowledgment but didn’t stop reassuring himself that she was alright.

“Hush, little one, you benefit from it,” Anakin said next to him.

“You’re only saying that because you’re not being manhandled,” Ahsoka argued.

“Yet,” Anakin added and Obi-Wan found himself nodding along with that sentiment. Ahsoka was a child, of course he had to check her first. And as reckless as Anakin could be, Obi-Wan did trust his mate. When he was done, he didn’t bother to move Ahsoka away from him as Anakin pressed himself into Obi-Wan’s side, a low whine escaping his throat.

Anakin was clingy, much more than usual. Obi-Wan frowned and pulled Anakin closer while Ahsoka used that opportunity to crawl out of Obi-Wan’s lap and drop herself across her Master’s instead. Obi-Wan rolled his eyes at her antics, but let her be, focusing on Anakin instead. He hadn’t noticed it immediately, it had been a couple weeks after all, but Anakin’s scent was off. The usual scent of burning embers was followed by something quite sweet, but nothing that reminded Obi-Wan of a heat.

“Anakin, when was your last heat?”

The silence that followed was answer enough. Obi-Wan groaned and wished not for the first time that Anakin still had his Padawan braid so he could tug at it.

“You’re taking suppressants again! You know how dangerous they are-”

“I’ve not been taking any suppressants!” Anakin protested. “I just haven’t had a heat since Snips-“

Anakin trailed off and turned to look at his Padawan. Over their bond, Obi-Wan could feel the moment when the realization settled in and just a few seconds later, Obi-Wan had figured it out as well. Anakin sighed and buried his face in Ahsoka’s neck, deeply inhaling her scent.

“The Council’s gonna kill me,” Anakin muttered, confirmation all but clear now.

Obi-Wan could tell he was troubled, worried by how they would react. Going by the way Ahsoka was looking at him, she could likely feel it as well.

“You’re hardly the first Master who has had to update their file since the war began,” Obi-Wan said, attempting to calm Anakin. There had only been two cases so far with older Masters and Padawans about Ahsoka’s age and they had been pretty much covered up. Nobody had thrown too much of a fuss about it, they couldn’t afford it, but the two also weren’t Anakin Skywalker, the public’s darling General.

“Not helping,” Anakin said. The conflict was clearly visible on his face, but Obi-Wan was relieved to see that there was no regret. The worst thing that could happen now was that Anakin would reject the bond.

“Could somebody please tell me what’s going on?” Ahsoka finally spoke up.

She looked at them both with narrowed eyes, suspicion spilling all over her mental shield.

“Anakin’s nesting,” Obi-Wan explained over Anakin’s murmured shut up, shut up, shut up, shut-

“Nesting!?” Ahsoka sat up straight and paled. “Master, are you preg-“

“No,” Anakin interrupted her and clasped his hand over her mouth to shut her up. “No, nope, I’m not, I promise. I wouldn’t be so stupid to have a baby. Let’s not even go there. It’s because of you.”

Ahsoka attempted to say something, but her voice was muffled. She pried Anakin’s hand off before repeating her words.

“What do you mean it’s because of me? I didn’t do anything!”

Her tone wasn’t accusing, she was honestly just confused, but Obi-Wan wasn’t so sure that even got through to Anakin, as tense as he was. In an attempt at calming him, he put his right hand over Anakin’s neck. He stiffened, then he closed his eyes and relaxed, his breathing evening out as well.

“Ahsoka,” Obi-Wan said. “When do Initiates usually become Padawans?”

Ahsoka frowned at him, likely unable to follow his train of thought. Obi-Wan waited patiently for her answer.

“Uuh, shortly after they’ve presented?” Ahsoka offered after a moment. “So roughly around the ages ten to thirteen of their species’ equivalent.”

“Correct,” Obi-Wan replied and watched as Ahsoka beamed. “And why do we do that?”

She was quicker to answer this time. “It’s so that a proper training bond can snap into place instead of a parent-child bond.”

Obi-Wan continued to look at her encouragingly. She was almost there, she only had to make that one final jump and she would have figured it out on her own.

“Togruta are later though,” she said slowly. “We’re 15 at youngest, but I was made a Padawan anyway because of the war…”

She stopped talking, a sure-fire sign that she was on the right track.

“And I haven’t presented yet, but I’ve bonded with Master and we use our bond frequently to communicate. I know the other Padawans don’t really do that. Is it because- oh.”

Ahsoka looked at Anakin with wide eyes, hoping he’ll affirm the conclusion she’d reached. Anakin didn’t open his eyes, but he did open up his arm, inviting Ahsoka to join his embrace. She didn’t wait another second to make herself comfortable in his arms. She rested her head against his chest curled into herself. They’d need to call the Council later, but that still had time. Instead, Obi-Wan tugged at one of the many blankets and pulled it over the three of them.

“I’m sorry, Snips,” Anakin said. “Now you’ll always be stuck with your Master in your mind.”

“It’s not like you planned this,” Ahsoka retorted, then flashed Anakin a smile that was really more fangs and wicked joy than blissful happiness. “Besides, stronger bonds are an advantage on the field. But I’m not calling you Dad, Skyguy.”

Obi-Wan snorted while Anakin just looked appalled. “Please don’t ever do that.”

Ahsoka had been pretty mischievous already when she had become a part of their pack, but the way she was smiling now was 100% Anakin’s influence and as far as Obi-Wan was concerned, he absolutely deserved to be at the receiving end of her teasing.

“On the other hand, I’m not sure,” Ahsoka mused. “It does have a certain flair and maybe the Chancellor would stop demanding your time so often if he knows you have a youngling around.”

“Ahsoka, I will assign you extra meditation if you don't shut up now.”

“But then you’ll have to meditate as well.”

Oh, yes, Obi-Wan had definitely missed their lighthearted bickering.

[dialux]

Feel free to completely ignore me, but I need to yell into the void and this particular void is nicer than the others.

You know how they completely destroyed Percy Jackson as a character when they made the movies? Like they just changed him ‘til he was a different person from the books and the fans hated it? This is how I feel about Tauriel.

Except with Percy Jackson they ruined already established characters and if you read the books then the “real” characters shine through. With Tauriel it’s like they set up something with great potential and then just let it fall and I feel fucking robbed. I think @actuallyfeanor talked about it once but having her openness and willingness to cooperate is a great juxtaposition to Thranduils more isonalist politics, and more power to PJ for adding some semi-realistic oc’s ya know? Plus it’s fun to have more ladies in the Movie!verse who actually take part in the fighting and just more elves who aren’t ancient and wise and all-knowing.

But then all her political opinions (and just opinions in general) turned out to be because she was in love with Kili, and they added a forced and contrived love triangle for ‘drama’ (also it felt like a way to ‘prove’ that Legolas was straight after all the gay ships in the lotr movies??? and that’s just gross all around) AND they completely butchered canon in the process?!??!

Like Thranduil was explicitly said to have embraced the ways of the woodelves in the books (I think his wife is Nandor?) but then he disapproves of Tauriel because she’s Sylvan and therefore lesser???? Thranduil is a lot of things, but bigoted against other elves isn’t one of them. And then! She goes and points an arrow at her own king because Girl Power I guess? But in context that just would not happen???? Like PJ that isn’t some power move that’s Kinslaying and elves just don’t do that casually! (Tauriel would absolutely get exiled if not outright executed for that seriously PJ what the Hell??!!?)

Sorry this is super long and probably incoherent but I’m just so fucking Tired of great concept characters getting butchered by people who don’t really seem to care about good storytelling and keeping to already established canon.

Alright, so I didn’t want to make this into a defense of the Hobbit movies- I still haven’t watched AUJ, so I’m... not the person for this, maybe- but I am nothing if not contrary, so here we go:

1. I actually liked the PJ film (I, again, have only watched one of them) (the only thing I remember from the movie is the scene with all the gods and goddesses at the very end- and, my god, was that a revelation of a scene)

2. I don’t, actually, think there’s much use in looking for similar themes and overarching plot devices from a movie than from a book. And the Hobbit films were handicapped from the very beginning with the desire to make them into multiple movies; there’s no room for character development as in a tv show but not enough material, really, for two films much less the third they ended up making. It was the worst possible decision they could’ve made.

3. I don’t think that Tauriel’s political opinions are motivated solely by Kili. I think he may have been a catalyst- by giving her that stone, by talking to her as less of an ancestral enemy and more as the dwarf that he is- but there are wider and more far-reaching implications to her politics. Not to mention that she has few compunctions about challenging Thranduil before she ever really has any relationship with Kili. The narrative tries its best to reduce Tauriel to a love interest, but it doesn’t achieve it.

4. When one of my aunts brought home a friend from college, my grandmother looked at his tall figure, looked at my 5′2″ aunt, brought her to the kitchen, and told her that she could study however she wanted so long as she didn’t fall in love with him, all because he was too tall for the wedding photos to be good. No, my grandmother did not- and does not- understand the point of height differences. And I’m not saying that Thranduil is like my grandmother, but I’m not not saying it, you know?

5. It is the Power Of Love that drove Tauriel to aiming that bow at Thranduil. Have you had your ancestral enemy to quasi-lover (that you couldn’t even bang to release some of that overwhelming tension) die in front of your eyes after trying to save you? No? Don’t judge then!!!!!!!!!

6. (On a more.... serious note: I don’t think threatening someone would lead to outright execution; there needs to be some, you know, follow-through on that threat.)

7. I do get your anger! There are numerous (SO MANY) times when I’ve just given up on media because the actual storytelling felt lacking, or weak, or- well, I don’t want to use the word exploitative, because I don’t think it’s meant that way and there needs to be motive for it to be that- but it certainly feels like it, doesn’t it? Like liking a character/looking for a meaningful ending/interacting with the source is being actively discouraged, over and over and over again. And I don’t have an answer for you on how to keep digging for those sparks of joy or meaning in a piece of work that feels increasingly meaningless: none except to say that there are 18929 works in the Hobbit films tag on AO3, and 6559 works in the LOTR films tag- and those 12000 more works are a product of the heartbreak and sadness and untapped potential that people like you and me saw in the Hobbit. The Hobbit ended: AO3 picked it up from there. That matters, because if nothing else, you’re in a community of other gremlins digging for bright things out of a morass of sludge.

[merakiaes]

Hello! Can I get Marvel, Harry Potter, Twilight, Stranger Things, The Witcher, Peaky Blinders, The Walking Dead, Suicide Squad, Game Of Thrones ship? 💖 179 cm tall; dark brown, past shoulder-length hair with bangs; blue eyes (the left eye is mixed with hazel, aka, heterochromia iridium); heptagon face shape with dimples; rectangle body shape. Hufflepuff. INFP-T. Bi-curious. Pisces-Aries cusp sign. ”Looks like could kill you, but is actually a cinnamon roll.” At first, I may come off as reserved, shy, yet polite. I, as many of us, have a resting bitch face, that’s why people may think that I’m in a bad mood. It takes me a lot of time to warm up to somebody, cause I have social anxiety. Hate small talk, or speaking in front of the public. When I’m nervous, I tend to mess up my words or forget what I was supposed to say. I’m usually playful, dirty-minded and goofy around close friends. I’m the so-called, ”fashionista and mom” from my circle of friends. A perfectionist, punctual, over-thinker, slight control/clean freak. Stubborn in some situations. If I’m annoyed or getting impatient, I can say something witty or sarcastic. I’m constantly fighting an inner battle with myself, trying to accept myself. I don’t like to smile or laugh in public, cause of the small gap between my front teeth. I really hate taking selfies or somebody else taking pictures of me. The clothes I wear depends on my mood (and the weather outside), but it’s always a mix of smart casual or comfortable. Don’t like doing things out of my comfort zone, prefer to stay indoors. Dislike asking people for help (it makes me feel uncomfortable). I don’t like arguments, but I will square up if they come for my family or I snapped. I’m a kind-hearted person, always ready to help someone in need, quite modest as well. My hobbies include listening to any type of music, reading, watching movies or tv shows, traveling (if given the chance), and cleaning. Have a thing for writing. Very protective of my family. Divorced parents. Motherly towards kids and friends. An old soul, and the ”black sheep” of my family. A feminist, support LGBTQ+ community. Sometimes I like to try and cook easy recipes. Dislike black coffee, prefer tea or orange juice. That’s it, - thanks!

MARVEL

I ship you with Bruce Banner!

He would be kind of wary and scared to talk to you to a start. The other guy may be big and strong, but he’s not. He doesn’t have much confidence in himself when in his human form and he would be intimidated by you at first glance, but once he actually works up the courage to come and talk to you, you’d get on great.

He knows what it's like to struggle with social anxiety so he would be patient and need some time to become comfortable with you, as well, scared of messing things up by saying the wrong thing and/or sharing too much. 

Like you, he rambles when he’s nervous so that’s just another thing you have in common, but once he’s comfortable with someone, he’s more than happy to participate in some sarcastic, dirty-minded banter. 

He’s very reserved and, like earlier mentioned, doesn’t have much confidence. He would never understand how someone like you would want someone like him but he would be so in awe of the fact that you did want him. 

He knows all too well what it’s like to be at odds with yourself and accepting who you are so he would be very understanding and supportive of that, and he’d comfort you about your insecurities and let you know that you’re more than good enough. 

You’re also very similar in that you prefer to stay indoors, away from all kinds of social activity, and not go out of your comfort zones while, as well as the way you’re both more than willing to help other people in need while disliking asking for help for yourselves.

HARRY POTTER

I ship you with George Weasley!

George is the literal definition of a cinnamon roll. He’s so kind, caring and thoughtful, and I feel like we don’t talk about that nearly enough. 

You’re shy and reserved, and he’s forward and energetic. You struggle to warm up to people, and he has no problem whatsoever getting to know new people. So I feel like it would be a good match. He would kinda just force all his energy onto you so that you, as a result, wouldn’t feel as anxious about meeting someone new, you know?

He could help you let loose a bit more, and I mean that in the most respectful way possible; not because you’re uptight, but more so to help relieve some of that stress and pressure that everything always has to be perfect.

He’s so loud as a person that neither you nor anyone else would even notice your mistakes, like messing up your words, because George and his twin just take the stage wherever they go. 

George loves pushing his limits and discovering new things so I feel like he’d definitely try to get you out of your comfort zones on some occasions, but at the same time, he’s a lot less pushy than his twin and would give up if he noticed that you really didn’t want to do something, whereas Fred probably would’ve just dragged you along by your arm and bugged you until you gave in.

He’d find your shy personality adorable to a start but once you got comfortable enough to show your playful, dirty-minded and goofy side, he would just be amazed and get even more excited around you. 

And knowing him, he’d love both your heterochromia and the gap between your teeth. He would find your eyes the most fascinating thing in the world, and he’s just generally a person who loves “different” and finds it beautiful. 

Being protective over family and loved ones is a plus for any of the Weasleys, seeing as the most precious thing they have is just that; family. So the fact that this is a quality you have would make George even more attracted to you, as would your motherly instincts.

 TWILIGHT

I ship you with Embry Call!

Like Bruce, Embry probably would’ve been a bit intimidated by you on first sight. Not only because of your resting bitch face, but also because he just has no experience with girls, whatsoever. 

After much encouragement from the other boys, however, he probably would’ve been able to work up the courage needed to approach you and most likely, knowing him, he would’ve stumbled over his words and completely messed up, so you’d never have to worry about messing up like that, yourself, because he would just be such a mess that it would be hard to beat. 

Embry is, like you, playful, dirty-minded and goofy when he’s in the right company, but he’s much quieter and shyer than the other boys on the reservation, as well as reserved in general - like you. He’s also a lot more caring and loving than his pack members but, like the rest of them, he’s very protective of family, which is just another thing the two of you share. 

Embry is a wolf so, obviously, he enjoys being outside and participating in fast-paced activities, but I don’t think he’d mind staying inside with you, watching movies, or just listening to music and hanging out. His mom definitely wouldn’t mind, as he’s technically grounded for life for sneaking out every night, which he keeps ignoring much to her dismay. 

He’s just so kind and humble. He’d be so sweet and supportive about your insecurities and never force you to do anything you’re not comfortable with, and he’d be all over your cooking, no matter how good or bad you are at it!

 STRANGER THINGS

I ship you with Jonathan Byers!

Jonathan knows everything about being the black sheep. He had to find himself and learn his value completely on his own, so he knows what it’s like to be at war with your own mind in accepting who you are. 

He believes that people should be judged by their ability to work rather than by what gender they are and that women should be respected just as much as men, as seen when he disapproved of how Nancy was being treated by her co-workers, and therefore also shares your feminist ideals. 

He would be the sweetest to you about your insecurities and tell you that it’s okay to be different no matter what and that you’re beautiful and enough just the way you are. 

He’s introverted, asocial and kind just like you, cares very deeply for family and knows what it’s like to have divorced parents. 

He’s very much into music just like you are and is not very fond of small talk nor fighting either, so I feel like you would have a really calm and stable relationship. 

 THE WITCHER

I ship you with Jaskier!

Jaskier is a little like George Weasley in the way that he always steals all the attention whenever he walks into a room. He’s got a very loud personality and for the same reasons I think you’d be good with George, I think you would be good with Jaskier!

Unlike you who prefer staying within your comfort one, Jaskier might care about that a bit too little. Let’s just say that he would never bother you about not being more adventurous, because he’d be far too busy stepping out of his comfort zone and getting into trouble, himself, to notice.

Jaskier is also a big fan of writing, reading and, of course, music, so I think you’d be able to have some really good times together.

 PEAKY BLINDERS

I ship you with Ada Shelby!

Being the only woman as well as the only really sensible member of a family full of gangsters for sure puts a person under the “black sheep”-category, so Ada knows all about feeling out of place. 

She’s the only member of the Shelby family who absolutely hates violence which is one of the main reasons I think you’d suit each other, seeing as you don’t like arguments. Just like you, she will square up if she absolutely has to in order to defend herself, but she’d much prefer not to. 

She’s very level-headed and tries her best to stay well clear of all the illegal activities that her family get up to, instead, putting her focus into activism and trying to improve equality for everyone, as well as trying to embrace the beautiful and sensuous things life has to offer.

She has a natural instinct to take care of those who can’t look after themselves, she’s kind-hearted and humane, accepting and understanding, so she would be very patient with getting to know you and let you take the time you needed. 

Out of all the Peaky Blinders characters, I can almost guarantee you that Ada is your best shot at getting a peaceful and unproblematic life. 

THE WALKING DEAD

I ship you with Daryl Dixon!

Daryl may be brave and good at surviving, but he is, at the same time, constantly facing challenges from his past as an abuse victim. Because of his trauma, he’s very socially awkward and doesn’t really know how to connect with other people, even though he does seem to have the desire to do so. For example, at the beginning of the apocalypse, he often spoke to people without making eye contact and cringed away from physical touch, with little to no social skills, and even though he has definitely gotten better at it, the struggle is still there to some extent.

His childhood trauma is also the reason for his insecurities, of which the biggest one is his scars. He’s ashamed of them and every day he’s reminded of the fact that he, through all his life, has been nothing and no one. He often shows signs that he considers himself to be worthless as well as depressed, and shows clear discomfort and distrust for people he’s not all that familiar with. 

Because of the discomfort of being around people, he prefers to keep his distance from groups, because he functions best when he’s either alone or in the company of just one or two people; preferably the former. So naturally, he’s very quiet, not at all fond of small talk. Even with people he’s comfortable being around, he’d rather sit in a comfortable, mutual silence than speak. 

You have all these things in common; finding it hard trusting and opening up to people, being over-thinkers, disliking small talk, constantly fighting inner battles with yourselves and struggling to accept yourselves, disliking asking people for help, as well as having big social anxieties in general.

But what you also have in common is that you’re very protective of family. Daryl may prefer to keep to himself, but he doesn’t hesitate to risk his life in order to save the members of his group. He’s incredibly selfless and loyal to a fault and would stop at nothing to protect his people as well as help people who can’t protect themselves. 

As a result of his abuse, he also an extreme attentiveness to others. He’s so hypervigilant that not only is he always prepared for zombies, but he can also attentive to the emotions of people. So even though he might struggle with communicating sympathy verbally and through touch, he will go to great lengths to use his special skills to help those in pain, this meaning - you wouldn’t have to communicate your feelings through words every time since he’d most likely pick up on your body language, which can be a really big relief when you’re self-conscious about stumbling over words when nervous and struggle with social anxiety. 

He would just be very understanding of your social issues in general and as he absolutely hates when people try to pry into his life before the apocalypse, he would never put any pressure, whatsoever, on you to open up to him in anything other than your own time. If anyone knows what it’s like to feel out of place, it’s him. 

SUICIDE SQUAD

I ship you with Rick Flag!

It’s no secret that Rick is very serious and short-tempered when in combat and on the job. His personality is usually described as sturdy, stoic and serious and he’s been trained to serve and follow orders without questions. He takes his responsibilities very seriously and gets frustrated when others don’t pay him the same respect.

But away from his job, Rick also has a softer, more vulnerable side and is capable of warming up even to enemies through his ability to see things from different perspectives, as seen when he happily hugs Floyd after defeating Enchantress. He’s deeply protective of those he loves and would go to unthinkable lengths to protect them. 

He isn’t a person who willingly goes out of his comfort zone either; on the contrary, it’s usually something he’s pressured to do by other people who, often, have some kind of leverage on him. 

So had he only been presented with the choice, I think he’d really be into the idea of a simple life with no drama, no danger. Just him, his significant other, living together and going about their ways either separately or together, before having dinner and falling asleep together in front of a good movie or tv show. He’d be more than happy living a life as simple as that. 

Underneath that whole military attitude, he also has a sense of humor hidden away; the goofy and playful one, just like yours. And I think that you would be really good together in that sense. 

GAME OF THRONES

I ship you with Jon Snow!

Jon is known to be humble, calm and withdrawn and would, at least after the events of the last season, much rather live a calm, simple life than one full of adventure and challenged limits since he’s so clearly shown to be burdened by the constant danger and responsibility. 

All his life, Jon has lived as an outcast; a bastard, and the black sheep in a family of wolves. Because of Catelyn’s consistent hatred and torment, he never felt anything other than hatred, self-doubt and shame toward himself and has never felt like he belongs anywhere, with anyone. 

He was forced to quietly wrestle with dejection and loneliness his entire life; always among them, but never really one of them, and because he never quite fit in, he was naturally more susceptible to anti-social behavior, as shown in the way that he always tends to mind his own business, prefers to stay within his comfort zone and also in the way that he isn’t big on small talk.

He was so ashamed of himself and who he was that he pledged himself to the Night’s Watch in order to escape the label of a bastard, so he knows better than anyone what it’s like to try and accept oneself. 

To finish it off, he’s the ultimate feminist, who takes powerful women for what they are and understands the importance of lifting them up. He encouraged Arya and her proclivity for archery and combat and he admitted to his misjudgments and faults without being derisive or sexist when Sansa outsmarted him and saved his ass in the Battle of the Bastards so he doesn’t consider it to be emasculating to be equal, or even inferior, to a woman, and doesn’t pick and choose what kind of woman to support. He supports all of them and their individual strengths, whether it be physical power in combat, or mental power in politics. 

FAST AND FURIOUS

I ship you with Leon!

Little is known about Leon since he was only in the first movie with minimal screentime, but I have, over the years, built my own opinion of him through his way of behaving in the moments we actually got to see him.

My first thought on him was that he’s a bit of the lost loner type and that he’s much more rational and level-headed than the others.

He voices his disapproval to Dom on several occasions and got shut down every time, which showed that he didn’t really trust him to keep them safe and out of handcuffs, and that he wasn’t comfortable with how far they were taking things. 

This, to me, equals that he’s not a person who is very fond of stepping out of his comfort zone and would much rather play it safe and stick to the things he knows.

I wouldn’t go so far as to call him a coward, but he’s definitely more cautious than the rest of the squad. Rather than getting high off the thrill, he just seems like he’s along for the ride, without actually needing the excitement like the others do. Plain and simple: he’s a tag-along:er, not an adrenaline junkie.

In the scenes he’s in, he was always the one to, in one way or another, look out for the well-being of the others, and I can imagine, since he and Jesse met before the two joined the squad, that he looked after Jesse for a long while, as well.

Jesse had pretty severe ADD as well as slightly faulty instincts and understandings in some social settings both because of his ADD and because he was raised by his criminal dad to know no better, so looking out for him would probably take a little bit of work since I’d guess that he got himself into trouble a lot. 

Because of this, I’ve kind of put him in the “caretaker”-category, since he seems to be so much more genuine and caring than the rest, and that, in turn, is why I think he’d be a good match for you. 

I also think that you’d be good together because of the fact Jesse shares a lot of qualities with you; a bit reserved, stuttering when nervous, and being generally anxious around strangers. Since Leon has experience with this, he wouldn’t judge you but rather know how to handle it, support you and make you feel more comfortable. 

His mother left him when he was still young and he has clearly been struggling to find a place where he belongs. He thought that he found it with Dom’s crew, but when Jesse died and Vince and Letty got seriously hurt, he obviously had enough, decided that the heat had become too risky and that he didn’t want anything more to do with the illegal activities. 

Once again, after Jesse’s passing, he was left alone, and I’m one hundred percent sure that he left the crew to go live a safer, calmer life because, like Rick Flag, he just seems like the type to want a quiet life with a like-minded significant other, maybe some animals and/or a kid or two. Basically just a “perfect, happy family”-situation with no risk-taking, just staying safe within your comfort zones. 

[letsunity]

Not Afraid - Chapter 3

Summery -  

The Bad Batch go to Tatooine to resupply and avoid the Empire. As per the usual, Omega gets separated from the group. Fortunately for her, Krayt's Claw just so happens to be nearby. Bossk and Embo guide her to Boba Fett, who takes interest in why the Kaminoans want her. It's a reluctant partnership, with the Bad Batch having to rely on Krayt's Claw to navigate non-military life.

When it came to hunting, it's good to start small and work your way up. This lot were soldiers, so at least they already had training. Omega didn't, so they'd have to work on that. Being a usual child, she'd get into trouble, so she needs to learn how to protect herself.

A relatively safe place is Lothal, a minor planet nobody cared for. Because no one cared for it, it was a good spot for hunters to refuel and get some supplies. The kid gets to look around, too, which was a bonus. She couldn't be dad's clone, so he wanted to know who her template was.

There's also a connection; he could feel her more than most people. It was a sixth sense kind of thing, knowing people's feelings and such. He didn't talk about it, given that it gave him an advantage over adversaries. It also told him when to be wary around his comrades, as the concept of loyalty is very different in the hunting world.

Whatever it was, he knew that his father had it too. Dad could feel things and react to them, to the point where Boba didn't need to talk sometimes.

There was the possibility of Arla.

Jango had a sister in his original family but assumed her dead. If they had a sliver of her DNA, then that could've been used to make Omega. It was only a theory, but ignoring any possibility was stupid. For all he knew, she's a combination; the Kaminoans can certainly do it.

"Embo, you're babysitting."

Knowing how Dengar could get, the Kyuzo wasn't going to argue. The man had a habit of causing unmitigated chaos when left unsupervised. It was useful, but when not working, it was a pain. Marrok snarled at Dengar, shaking his head at the man's poor smell.

"Out of all planets, what's with this one?" Hunter inquired, noticing a settlement a mile away.

"In communities like this, there's always trouble. Where there's trouble, someone is willing to pay for it to disappear," Bossk answered, attaching his blaster to his back. "You're good with droids, but how're you with people?"

In the clone wars, they fought droids. They were trained to be ruthless with droids. When it came to people, however, they didn't have as much experience. People aren't as durable as droids, so they could seriously hurt someone without meaning to. Knowing how to restrain themselves was important.

"Highslinger can guard the ships; he isn't overly fond of crowds. One of your guys can go with Embo and Dengar to get food, the rest with us."

"I get to come?" Omega beamed, to which the Trandoshan grinned. Boba tossed his helmet to her, watching her investigate the design. "What's this for?"

"You've got a bounty, and people have eyes everywhere. That'll keep your identity hidden, and it's durable enough to take a blaster rifle. Stick with us, and it'll be fine," Boba said, feeling disapproval from the Batch. "Sheltering her is only going to make it easier to catch her. She's going to learn somehow, better early than later."

While Hunter didn't want Omega in danger, she had a habit of getting in trouble anyway. The helmet was a little big on her, but she was certainly obscured.

She could see clearly with the helmet, and it sealed around her neck, making it airtight. It filtered the air, keeping it fresh and safe. She couldn't smell anything, but Omega was ok with that. She could tag along and help instead of getting in the way.

Wrecker complimented her, calling her a little soldier.

"You're confident she'll be fine," Echo noted, disliking the look he got from the teenager. "What? What're you staring at?"

"I thought you were familiar. Everyone's heard about the 'Hero of Anaxes'. The one that escaped the Techno Union and used their own bullshit against them. It won't help much, but I doubt a traitor would do that."

As expected, the pale clone was heavily disturbed. Boba knew that he felt guilty over it, even though that didn't make much sense. It's like blaming a blaster for shooting somebody.

"We did that too!" Wrecker cheered, punching Bossk's shoulder. "We blew shit u-AH!"

Bossk punched him back, harder than he intended.

A thing many people forget is that Trandoshans and Wookies are natural enemies. Trandoshans are capable of being in a fistfight with a Wookie and potentially win. Puny clone trooper armour isn't going to protect against something like that. It made Wrecker excited, knowing he can brawl with someone without restraining himself.

Hunter didn't want them to get attached to this lot; it was a reluctant partnership. Walking with them made him constantly anxious, given how they aren't the honourable sort. The moment they deemed it necessary, they'd turn on Hunter in a second.

Their boss was Hunter's age, though he aged slower. The Bad Batch had been in the field for nearly four years; he's been out here his whole life. The only thing making them allies was the blonde question mark. As soon as Boba got his answers, there was no telling what he'd do.

He has leverage regarding the underworld, but Hunter has something to make the teen need him. If the hunters needed them, then they won't consider betraying them.

"What do you know about Order 66?" Hunter inquired, expecting the boy not to know.

As he did with Echo, the teen looked through him, like he was peering into Hunter's soul. He appeared amused, although Hunter couldn't imagine what he found so funny.

"No point being shy about it, Sarge. What've you got that I'd be interested in?"

So much for being sneaky about it. He'll figure this kid out, preferably sooner than later.

"Inside of every clone is a chip. Once activated, it makes you follow orders, regardless of loyalties. It's why the clone troopers turned on the Jedi," he stated, watching Omega skip around the grass.

Bossk and Wrecker were casually wrestling around, getting filthy and messing about. Echo was keeping Omega away from their frolicking, and Boba wasn't fazed by it. He was more interested in Hunter's revelation.

"Fuck that. Nobody's in charge of me except for me. The girl has one as well?"

He hadn't even considered that possibility. Sure, it was entirely likely that she had her own inhibitor chip, maybe with a different code. Once again, more questions that'll be dangerous to answer.

"Probably. We haven't been affected because of our mutations, and you're already aware of Echo. We had someone else with us, but his chip worked."

"Whose to say that they aren't? It could be acting slower for you."

"Which is why we're trying to deactivate them. When we do ours, we can save our friend, maybe save all of the troopers."

"And the ones that side with the Empire anyway?"

"We'll blow up that bridge when we come to it."

"Already talking like a Bounty Hunter, Sarge."

Alright, maybe the kid wasn't so bad after all.

"You don't have to call me Sarge."

"Listen, Jungle Ramclone; I do what I want. If I want to acknowledge your rank, I will. If you earn a title, you keep the damn thing."

That was the first time someone threateningly called him a Sergeant.

It didn't take too long to arrive at the settlement, a small town. People lived peacefully in a bustling market, trading goods and leading mundane but comfortable lives. Cut used to have a life like this before the Empire ruined it, and it was only a matter of time before the same happened here.

While Hunter wanted it for Omega, it wasn't the life she wanted. She wanted to stay with them, to be a part of their team. Learning how to look after herself would make matters easier. The more experience she had, the less that Hunter had to worry. He'd always worry, but at least he'd be comforted knowing that she could manage alone.

Running into Krayt's Claw could've been the best thing to happen to her. They had connections now, guides who can give them a footing in the galaxy. The dark secrets that the Republic fought to uncover was readily available for them. He didn't intend for this to last, but it provided options.

Maybe becoming a group of hunters was their best option, considering that civilian life doesn't suit them. They're warriors to the bone; combat was engineered in them. Becoming mercenaries with a strict moral code was something to look into.

While observing the various stalls, Hunter took notice of a Sakiyan causing trouble. Duty-bound, the Sergeant stepped in, getting between the man and the young woman. She had an infant in her arms, only a day or so old. The Sakiyan wasn't intimidated until Wrecker walked up behind him, glaring through his helmet.

His presence was enough to send the thief running, not wanting to be on the clone's anger. Hunter helped the woman stand, being careful of her infant child.

"Thank you, kind sirs," she smiled, looking over her baby. He had a small tuft of black hair reminiscent of stubble. "How may I repay you?"

"No problem. Just keep that little one alright, and it's all good," Wrecker smiled, forgetting that she couldn't see it. "If anyone needs a hand, we're gonna give it!"

The baby squirmed at the loud noise, opening a pair of lavender-blue eyes. He looked to hunter, gurgling slightly. Unsure of what to do, Hunter gave a short wave, not used to infants.

"Ezra likes you," she smiled, kissing her baby's forehead. "My name is Mira. If you need some help, come and find me. You're more than welcome in the Bridger home."

And like that, they made an ally. Wrecker felt good, and Hunter had a hunch that the kid would grow into someone special. It was just a feeling; he had something similar about Omega.

Said girl was with Echo, exploring the market with Bossk watching like a hawk. The Trandoshan bought her some fruit, slightly overpaying for it. Hunter started to decipher the reason for this behaviour.

By proving themselves to be generous and kind, the people would be more cooperative. They'd enjoy engaging with such 'honourable' gentlemen, even though they were violent by profession. Boba alone decimated a Star Destroyer at Omega's age, which could be why he had so much faith in her.

Hunter should have more faith in her, too. She was inexperienced, not a fragile piece of glass.

"Build a relationship, provide a financial reward, and you've got yourself a spy," Boba smirked, chewing on some dried meat.

That's what he meant by eyes everywhere. Hunter assumed droids or cameras, but no, he meant average citizens. Anyone was a potential spy for a bounty hunter, the variety ensuring their secrecy. The entire town could be spies for anyone, even the likes of Fennec.

Omega needs to keep that helmet on until she gets her own. Keeping themselves obscure would be wise, too. Their armour is easily recognisable; they can't disappear if everyone knows what they look like.

The teenager nodded as he tossed some to Wrecker, who practically inhaled the meat.

"You're starting to get it."

While it was creepy how the kid knew his feelings, it also made things easier. Boba could feel his intentions, possibly explaining why he was helping. He threw a piece to Hunter, casually re-joining Bossk, Echo and Omega as the girl held a fuzzy loth-cat toy. Bossk repeated the action from before, complimenting the Rodian working there.

He was manipulating the woman. By appearing so sweet with a kid, it'd make her reluctant to tattle.

There was a lot more to this profession than even the Senate could ever realise. He wanted to know more about it.

[lairofsentinel]

Ifan ben-Mezd (extra) character details

Since someone asked me about all the curiosities and details related to Ifan ben-Mezd that one can find in game and are reflected on the fics The Search for Divinity and The Divine Doom, I think I forgot to add in my [previous post] a couple of details that reinforce aspects of Ifan such as his relentlessness when it comes to Divines and his crusader core, not always easy to see in a single playthrough.

The exploration of those details were done by DanaDuchy using their Youtube videos that can be found in their channel. 

[WARNING: Spoilers of Divnity Original Sin 2 and the before-mentioned fics]

If you do not recruit your potential companions in Fort Joy, you will find them in the Lady Vengeance afterwards, when Gareth and Malady ask you to make the ship functional again. You can interact with your companions for the first time in each of the corners of the ship where they usually are during the game. [Video: Recruting your companions in the Lady Vengenace]

From this situation, we obtain the following details related to Ifan:

Ifan has crow's feet when he smiles.

His temples are grey.

He looks “a lot older” than his bright green eyes.

He uses the word “cute” with the Godwoken in a quite sarcastic way, since the Godwoken is trying to fool him in vain.

--------------------------------

During your missions in the Reaper's Coasts, if Ifan keeps disapproving your actions, he will talk to you alone [Video: Ifan disappoves]

From this situation, we obtain the following details related to Ifan:

Ifan always stays with Friends.

His exact words are: “You are treading a fine line between friend and enemy lately. It's your life to do as you choose... but I'll be choosing to spend mine with friends. Understood?”

This makes you infer that Ifan certainly considered friends people like Roost [and other Lone Wolves]. We know via Trompdoy or the ghosts of the children in Roost's room, that Roost [and Lone Wolves in general] abused and tortured children; killing them in the best case scenario. So, this enforces the idea I explored with more detail in [The Divine Doom] about how Ifan betrayed his crusader core for a long time, deeply lost in life and in drudanae, having a deep bond with terrible people like Roost or Aywyn, looking aside (if not being active participant, who knows) these wicked treatments. This shows how low and apathetic Ifan was during his early Lone Wolf period. He truly considered these people his friends. Shocking. But not so much if we remember that he may even work for the Black Ring as a Lone Wolf. He could not betray his crusader core even more.

While he disapproves of the main char’s choices, he certainly grows tenser. When it is too much, Ifan decides to leave the group for good. It's interesting to see that, instead of killing you and getting rid of a dangerous loose-end, he trusts you a last thing: to keep in secret his contract of killing Alexandar. A great vote of trust for someone who disapproves so much the main Godwoken.

I wonder how to understand this permissive situation that could cost his contract. I like to think that he certainly had a crush on the Godwoken since the first moment he saw them [as he confessed in his Romance scene]. Because being so generous with a person that causes him so much disapproval, it may mean that he truly liked the Godwoken until he started to see the way they moved in the world. Or simply it is what he said to the Godwoken in the Ship to Fort Joy or in the Hollow Marshes: life is the most important thing, and he doesn't take it for petty reasons; he values it. At least, in this present in which he lives. Probably this concept of caring for ‘innocent life’ is some habit recently acquired, since his relationship with Roost and his treatment of children may suggest that Ifan's apathy during that time post-war and post-Deathfog had emotionally and ethically impaired him to truly care about anything else. Once again, this concept makes sense in his characterisation: he repeated during all the game that after the Deathfog "nothing mattered anymore", so certainly children abuse may truly have no effect on his old self, back then. 

--------------------------------

If your approval is not high enough and you insist on becoming Divine, even if he is romanced, Ifan ‘betrays’ you, before entering the chamber where the last boss awaits. [Video: Ifan betrays]. However, more than betrayal, I would like to call it his own coherence.

“I've trusted before. And been burnt by that trust.”

I loved this detail because it shows how coherent and relentless he is against Lucian, against the existence of a Divine, and one can infer that he has the same violent reaction towards Deathfog. [Of course, this is part of the reasons why  [The Divine Doom] has such emphasis in his distaste to concentrate power in few people, or the research based on Deathfog]

His exact words are: “I can't put the interests of one individual above the fate of all Rivellon. Even if that person is you, even after we've shared so much. I've made that mistake before. And we all know how well it turned out..”

“At one time, I thought we could (face the end together) but I was wrong. I need to face this end alone.” The main char can convince Ifan that Divinity can be used for doing good, but Ifan answers: “I've trusted before. And been burnt by that trust. I can't do it again. (He draws his weapon) There will be no new Divine on my watch.”

This shows his crusader core, or at least, a stage in which he is reconnecting with that old self that was part of the Divine Order and wanted to do good things for Rivellon. Probably this sentiment is now encouraged by his deep guilt as well and his need to atone for his mistakes. It is also reinforced once again his regret for having worked for Lucian. He will not make the same mistake again, working by the side of a Divine. This is why he rejects your offering of working with him if you decide to be a Divine by the end of the game. It's engraved in his core characterisation to repel the monopoly of power in one single person. Even if he adores his Godwoken and wants them to visit him. 

As it’s easy to notice, this is the scene from where I took such dramatic phrase with a high relevance in [ The Divine Doom].

Regarding to details in Ifan’s character that can be found in The Search for Divinity and The Divine Doom, there is this small list, which is in fact a list of headcanons, but some of them are half-canon [warning: this list spoils 100% those fics] 

[lieutenantcharleslorem]

It is finished! This is a commission for @datalaur​! It was fun to go outside my comfort zone, since I do not actively ship Data/Geordi, but I hope I did it justice. 

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Star Trek: The Next Generation Rating: General Audiences Relationships: Data/Geordi La Forge Summary: The Enterprise is transporting some dignitaries, and one of them has the hots for Data. This inspires Geordi to say something he probably should've said a long time ago.

The Junior Minister was a plump woman. Certainly wide in appearance especially when standing next to Counselor Troi, but not unattractively so. Her short navy hair emphasized strength while drawing attention to her soft features and light eyes. And those eyes were so thoroughly and obviously fixed on Data, Geordi thought he could have seen it without his visor.

Having feelings for a dear friend was a strange thing, because part of Geordi wanted to tell Data to go for it; he deserved an alien fling once in a while just as much as anyone else on the crew. But of course, part of him wanted to tell the Junior Minister to take a hike.

“They’ll, uh… They’ll catch you staring, Sir. At least, someone always does me…” said Barclay, sitting down next to Geordi at the bar. He practically winced as he sat, not really knowing if he was welcome.

“No one ever accuses a blind man of staring, Reg.”

“But you are. St-staring, I mean… Aren’t you?”

“I’m having a drink, and looking in the general direction of our guests.”

“Yeah, he’s been staring at them for 20 minutes,” interjected Guinan. “But how you doing, Reg? You want some fruit punch?”

“I-Well, er, yes please.”

Geordi smiled, thinking for a moment that Guinan could make just about anyone feel at home, but his eyes never left Data and the Junior Minister.

While the Junior Minister sat with the officers in the middle of the room, fully immersing herself, the High Minister, a tall man whose dark blue hair was greying on the sides, stood at the end of Ten Forward having a muted conversation with the Captain and Commander Riker. * Ten Forward was fuller than Geordi had ever seen it. The Ministers had 6 other dignitaries with them, 2 lawyers, and 17 trackers which as far as the crew could tell meant some sort of assistant, and all 27 people were mingling jovially with Starfleet officers. Their people had been in the process of joining the Federation for 7 years and according to some gossip from one of the trackers, it was still a few years off.

“Though we’re a warp capable species with a one world government, it’s obvious the Federation disapproves of our bartering system,” one of the trackers had mentioned to Ensign Velor that morning. The ensign was meant to be leading each of them to their quarters; Geordi just happened to overhear the chatting.

The Enterprise was transporting them to some sort of negotiation and cultural exchange. No one really knew the details.

“Care to join us?” asked the Junior Minister, looking straight at Geordi. Her voice carried over the crowd with ease, without her yelling or disrupting the other sounds of the bar. It was a little unsettling, in fact.

“I told you,” Barclay whispered.

“Mmm, forgive me if I’m resistant to trust your assessment of social situations,” said Geordi lowly, while shooting the Junior Minister an apologetic smile. Barclay sank a little further inside himself. Geordi took a swig of his drink, left it on the bar, and stood to approach the group.

Halfway there, he said, “Come on, Reg.”

Barclay stood suddenly, smoothing his uniform. He started to follow but Guinan whispered, “Reggie, take your drink with you,” and pushed his glass toward him. He raised an eyebrow and she added, “Something to do with your hands.” He nodded and took his drink with him.

“Geordi La Forge is the Chief Engineer, of the Enterprise,” Data introduced him, adding, “He’s also my best friend.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mr. La Forge.”

“Right, I just wanted to apologize. I didn’t mean to leer. I was just, thinking about something. It’s an honor, Junior Minister.”

“Oh please, like I told your friend, call me Tuviece. And who is this?” asked the Junior Minister looking squarely at Reg. He tried and failed to look her in the eye.

“Is there something wrong with my face?” she asked. Counselor Troi opened her mouth to cut in, but Data beat her too it.

“Lieutenant Barclay interacts somewhat differently than other humans. He means no disrespect, just as I would not were I to do something considered socially unacceptable by your people.”

Tuviece smiled, eying Data. “You care very much your crewmates, hm?”

“I… They are my family,” said Data, not wishing to bog Tuviece down with a more technical explanation of how an android forms attachments.

Geordi and the Junior Minister melted. Deanna would have too, normally the first to call Data cute, but she had to take a subtle step back from the group instead, overwhelmed by Tuviece and Geordi’s internalized reactions. She blinked and fanned herself with her hand. She made eye contact momentarily with Barclay, and his eyes widened as he tried to figure out what the look on her face meant.

“That must be magical to be so close with your coworkers.”

“Magical?” asked Data, “I do not understand.”

“She just means good, Data,” said Geordi, “Very good.”

“Yes, it is a common expression in my language. When something feels so special it is as if it was caused by an impossible magical force.”

“O-ours too. Our language I mean,” said Barclay.

“Ah, so you can speak!” replied Tuviece.

“Do you have many relationships you would consider magical?” asked Data.

“Mm, no I suppose not… But that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t like one.”

The Junior Minister was a very passionate woman, and with her feelings, Geordi’s responses, and Barclay’s embarrassment, Deanna could only handle being in the conversation so long.

“I hate to run, but I think I’ll go check on the captain if you don’t mind,” said Troi.

“Oh, of course, dear,” she grabbed Deanna’s hand suddenly. “If I don’t see you again this evening, have a pleasant night. It was a pleasure to meet you.”

“Of course, a pleasure,” the counselor replied, moving away.

“Now, boys!” continued the Junior Minister, “Tell me what made each of you decide you wanted to serve on a starship?”

The night wound down gradually. The High Minister had already gone to bed, as had Reg, both admitting they needed some time alone. No one knew when the captain had disappeared, only that he was probably the first. The Junior Minister was afraid she wouldn’t be able to remember where her quarters were, so Data had offered to guide her.

“Such a gentleman,” she had called him.

Riker, Troi, La Forge, and Worf meandered slowly down the hall, heading for their own beds.

“Geordi, I’m sensing some discomfort,” said Troi.

“Hm? Oh, you know… big parties.”

“Oh, come on, you’re the life of the party,” said Riker with a smirk.

“I understand the feeling,” said Worf. “I too find parties exhausting.”

“Don’t Klingons have rather wild parties?” asked Riker.

“Our celebrations can be a bit much for humans, but the requirements of the socializing are different. Less pretense.”

“Sure,” said Troi, trying not to sound sarcastic.

“Though I will admit, even Klingon social events are sometimes tiring and disconcerting for me.”

“Well, everyone needs their space,” said Troi, “but that wasn’t the type of discomfort Geordi was feeling, was it Geordi?”

They stopped as they reached Geordi’s quarters. They formed a casual circle, Geordi’s back to his door. “… I didn’t ask for a group therapy session,” he said.

“If you need to share your feelings, Commander, we will listen without judgment,” said Worf.

The three of them turned their heads to look at Worf.

“What?” he asked. “Why do you stare?”

No one answered, and Worf huffed.

Troi cleared her throat, “I’m only worried that you’re sabotaging yourself again, Geordi.”

“Again?” La Forge replied incredulously. When he looked at the others, he realized they agreed with that assessment, and was suddenly quite self-conscious. “What is it exactly you think I’m doing on purpose?”

“Not on purpose,” said Riker, “But subconscious. Because of… well, hmm…”

“Out of fear,” finished Troi. “But there’s nothing to be afraid of—”

“Deanna—” interrupted Geordi, but Troi didn’t stop.

“I don’t think honesty will hurt you in this situation.”

“Yes,” Worf cut in, “do not dishonor yourself with lies.”

Geordi raised an eyebrow at Worf, wondering why he cared about this.

“It’s not fear… It’s… I just don’t know if it’s fair to put that kind of pressure on him.”

“I don’t know, I think our android friend is pretty good at taking things in stride,” said Riker with a smirk.

“I just don’t know if he is in a position to be made to make those kinds of decisions.”

 “Well what if something happened with the Junior Minister?” asked Troi.

“That’s different… She’ll be gone soon enough. There’s no long-term decision to be made.”

“Listen, I know Data is a little awkward when it comes to dating but—”

“Is that what we’re talking about?” asked Worf. “Commander La Forge having a romantic interest in Data?”

“Oh Worf…” said Deanna. Riker started laughing. La Forge delicately lifted his visor from his face so that he could rub the bridge of his nose.

Replacing it, he said, “It’s like a teenager. They think they know what they want. And when it comes down to it, you can’t stop them from having their own experiences, but… but you can’t expect…”

Geordi drifted off and there was a pause as they all let his point sink in.

“La Forge, if I may?” asked Worf.

“What is it, Worf?” asked Geordi, trying not to sound exasperated.

“Now that I understand the premise of this conversation, am I to infer that you are insinuating Commander Data should be deemed incapable of giving consent?”

“I… well not in so many words—”

“Because from what I know of Data, though he wishes to be a part of humanity, he also values his autonomy, and I believe he would be offended by a denial of his right to make his own choices.”

Worf’s surprisingly aware statement rattled around in Geordi’s head the rest of the evening. He was right. It was up to Data to make his own choices. That didn’t mean Geordi would automatically get whatever he wanted, but not everything was about him.

Data helped him with some maintenance in engineering for most of the next day. Reg was in and out providing assistance. The Junior Minister came around to observe. Normally La Forge didn’t appreciate outsiders sticking their nose in his warp core, but the maintenance wasn’t urgent, and Tuviece asked questions with a friendly curiosity that showed she didn’t mean to get in the way. Plus since Data didn’t mentally tire, or struggle with how to answer a technical question, he was happy to entertain all of her inquiries. Sometimes Reg would translate to layman’s terms when he got the courage.

Around midday Tuviece asked if they ever took breaks.

“Ha! Sometimes. But oh so rarely,” Geordi had joked from his place on the floor.

“ I was so hoping to have a spot of lunch with you…” She said it like she meant all three of them, but she looked at Data out of the corner of her eye. Geordi figured he shouldn’t third-wheel, so he made up some excuse about not leaving this panel open.

Data immediately began explaining that he neither requires breaks or food, and Geordi could almost hear the disappointment on her breath.

“Well then… What about you, Reginald? Care to join me?”

“Me?” he asked.

“Of course. I promise you don’t have to look me in the eye if you don’t want to.”

Reg let out a half laugh, and led her back to Ten Forward.

“Data, you eat sometimes,” La Forge said once they were gone.

“Yes, but I do not need to.”

“…Buddy, are you blowing off Tuviece on purpose?”

“Blowing her off? You mean to avoid? No. Should I have gone to lunch with her?”

“Only if you wanted to.”

“I… I have no specific desire. No desire to stay or to go.”

“Oh.”

Geordi knew he should talk to him, but he also knew he wouldn’t be able to focus on work afterward.

Reg and Tuviece returned after about an hour. It wasn’t their fault, but by the end of the day Geordi was sick of them both. Or maybe it was of Data being oblivious.

When Tuviece asked if someone might walk her back to her quarters, Data volunteered Reg for the job. Geordi raised his brows and mouthed why at him but Data only looked confused in return.

After Reg and Tuviece had disappeared, Data and Geordi chatted idly as they made their way toward Data’s quarters.

“Data, what’s the matter? You don’t like the Junior Minister?”

“I like her very much. She is fascinating.”

“Then why’d you send Reg to walk her back to her quarters?”

“His quarters are closer to hers.”

“Sure, I guess that’s logical.”

“Have I turned down another invitation, Geordi?”

“Well… Yeah, actually.”

“But why would she prefer me to walk with her?”

“Data…” whispered Geordi as they came up to the door to Data’s quarters. He turned and leaned against the bulkhead, crossing his arms and pulling up a leg to press his foot into the metal behind him.

Data came close, anticipating Geordi continuing to speak quietly.

“She likes you, Data.”

“And I like her too, but—”

“No, she’s interested in you. Romantically.”

“Oh.”

“And if you don’t want to engage with her in that way, that’s obviously up to you. But I just thought you should know so that you have the choice.”

“Oh,” Data repeated.

“I mean, because I have feelings for you too,” Geordi blurted out before he could lose his nerve. “And you don’t have to acknowledge that either. But I just wanted you to know all your options, because if you don’t know—”

“Do you believe I have offended the Junior Minister?”

“Oh… I… maybe a little, but not detrimentally so.”

“So you do not think that I should interact with her on a romantic level in order to maintain diplomacy?”

“Oh, no, Data she’s not going to be angry if you don’t like her. Only go for it if you want to. It’s about what you want.”

“I see no reason to. I’ve already attempted to have a relationship once and it failed.”

“You—Data, that was like three days.”

“It was nine.”

“Okay, but Data, that’s not how it works. Relationships aren’t pass or fail, and you’re supposed to keep trying until you find the right fit for you. I mean, that is, unless you don’t want to.”

“Would explaining this to me require lying about having these types of feelings for me?”

“Lying? I wasn’t lying.”

“Then why would you choose now to tell me?”

“When do you think the best time would have been?”

“Whenever it first became true, which I’m assuming wasn’t during this conversation.”

“Well… that’s easier said than done, Data.”

“Why, if you have these feelings, would you push me toward someone else?”

“I’m not pushing you. I just wanted you to know the opportunities. I just want you to be—” he almost said happy but stopped himself. “Satisfied,” he finished, “I want you to have what you want.”

“I like challenges, but most humans I have observed seem to enjoy relationships more when they are less challenging. A familiarity seems to help in anticipating and preventing challenges. I would also personally prefer a relationship that lasted a significant amount of time, as I haven’t experienced that yet. And since I don’t have a sex drive, there’s nothing pulling me toward the momentary interlude I would have with Junior Minister Tuviece.”

“I see.”

Geordi was so resistant to getting his hopes up that he almost looked sad, and Data put a hand on his shoulder with a look of concern.

“So, you are the obvious choice,” said Data.

“Excuse me?”

“You are the obvious choice for me to be in a relationship with.”

“But you can choose no one. You don’t have to be in a relationship.”

“I’m… unsure why you keep repeating the same point. But you have presented me with an opportunity and I am taking it. Unless you are taking back what you have said.”

“No! No, I’m not taking it back.”

“Excellent,” Data said moving forward and kissing Geordi with little grace.

“Data, Data,” mumbled Geordi, “You’re pressing on my visor.”

“I apologize.”

“Maybe we should go inside.”

“Your quarters are more comfortable,” said Data.

“You’re incapable of physical discomfort.”

“I would like you to be comfortable.”

“If you insist,” Geordi said pushing off the bulkhead and starting off for his own quarters.

“Geordi?” Data asked.

“Yes, Data?”

“There are several things that, due to my lack of time in relationships, I have yet to experience… that I would like to.”

“Let’s… let’s wait until we get into my quarters, and then… you can tell me all about them.”

 As this particular mission came to an end the captain, his chief engineer, his first officer, his second officer, and… Reg, walked with their multitude of guests to transporter room 1.

“It was a pleasure meeting you, High Minister Bieve,” said the Captain Picard.

“The feeling is mutual, Captain,” he replied as he joined several others on the transporter pad. One of the trackers blew Riker a kiss, and then the group was gone.

The Junior Minister was the last to leave, and as she turned back toward them on the transporter pad, she told them how much she’d enjoyed spending time with all of them.

Just before she disappeared, she said, “I’ll write to you, Reginald,” and winked.

Reg blushed.

“Barclay!” said Geordi once she was gone, “Did you—?”

“It’s none of your business,” he replied without missing a beat.

“Reg!” Geordi shouted, clapping him on the back.

Speaking for the first time, Riker said, “I guess everybody got laid this weekend.”

The Captain pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed, but admittedly, he did it with a smile.