#this is a long post of me being nostalgic lol;;;;

[nomaishuttle]

i hsd 2 stop listening . 4 mental health reasons and also bc i havent found a video essayist whos channel i can binge at work Nor have i found any other podcast that i want 2 listen 2 at work

[oflgtfol]

no idea if im just overly emotional bc i got my period today, or because i’m sleep deprived, or because i’m just mentally discombobulated in general lately due to my overnights, etc. but regardless, i’m about to be really emo about michaels right now

working 40 hours a week in a completely different store with a total different layout and vibe, and completely different people, is making me genuinely miss my home store and my coworkers so much. everyone on these overnight shifts are really nice and it’s a nice store like there’s nothing WRONG, it’s just, it feels wrong to be putting in 40 hours a week at michaels only for me to not see a single inch of my home store?? i miss my place man. i’m even thinking of just stopping in off the clock just to say hi hello to everyone cuz god damn

[mothwingwritings]

Can we have Ren/Fox (TPOF) and Mc with a child?Long after Fox decided to stay with MC, they both had a daughter (probably not something with consent and a bit of Stockholm syndrome).The daughter asks her mother how she got the scars and this makes MC have memories of post-traumatic stress.

I was so tickled by this ask that I started manically typing out a response for it nearly as soon as I saw it in my ask box (which at this point, was quite some time ago. Forgive me, I am a mess lul). I wrote the whole damn thing in a fit of passion, excited to release it into the world… But ultimately hated it and thought it was garbo, so I scrapped it and tried again. Wrote a second iteration and thought ‘hell yeah, this is it!!! Sick!’, but then I read it AND HATED THAT ONE TOO AAAHHH!!!

I rewrote this… so much…

But I never give up on my dreams, and you shouldn’t either! Persevere! Don’t give up on yourself! Here’s your daily motivation for the day! Keep writing even it makes you cry!!! :D

Anyway, so I wrote this third one, comprised of new stuff and the stuff I actually did like from the first two stabs, and it ended up being the one. Truly it is a Frankenstein of a fic lol. Regardless of all the reworking, I had a lot of fun writing this and enjoyed the prompt very much!!! I I hope you enjoy reading it just as much. :)

I’m sorry if the writing seems a tad too mature for the reader’s daughter in this, writing children isn’t my forte. ^^;

Due to the nature of this fic, IT IS 18+ ONLY!!! Thank you!

WARNINGS: Incessant mentions of abuse of all kinds for reader and mentions of physical abuse for her child!!! Reader is heavily scarred from said abuse and that’s a main theme in this fic so please avoid if that is upsetting to you. Also, though not the main focus, there are multiple mentions of child abuse in this fic, as well a part where reader goes off verbally on her child, so please be mindful of that as well! Other things of note: reader is a parent in this (which you can probably tell by the prev warning lol), reader getting hurt, blood, manipulation, Stockholm syndrome, being held against your will/isolation, mentions of noncon, sad family stuff :(

Diminishing rays of afternoon light splayed through the open window of your quaint living room, casting a comforting orange glow over everything they touched. The light gave the environment an ethereal and nostalgic feel, wrapping you in peaceful warmth as the sun sunk lower and lower. The loveseat you occupied was plush and inviting, and a mug of your favorite tea stood at the ready on the small coffee table beside you, steadily cooling with help from the last hurrah of winter blowing in gently from the outside. Besides the slight chill, the wind brought with it the heavy scent of freshly bloomed flowers, a delightful precursor to the oncoming spring.

Relishing the rare moment of serenity, you couldn’t help but wish that all your days could be this lovely.

You smiled down at your daughter who sat perched in your lap, happily flipping through the newest gift she had acquired from her Father- a thick picture book full of bright illustrations highlighting various exotic animals. As it lay sprawled across her tiny lap, her chubby finger pointed out each animal she took an interest in, her high pitched voice chirping away as she explained what she liked about the creatures. She got particularly excited when she spotted the page full of foxes, jabbing at the red one feverishly as she exclaimed “its daddy!”

Spotting the foxes began her down a path of assigning an animal to not just herself, but you as well. She didn’t find it fair that only her father had kin in the animal world, even though you pointed out that she technically did as well by sharing half the man’s blood. Your revelation did little to deter her, she wanted something new, something just for herself, and she wasn’t going to stop until she found her perfect soul animal. So she continued on, scanning each page in earnest until she found a creature that suited her.

She ended up picking a bunny for herself, supplying you with a comprehensive reason as to why she chose it. As she explained in great length, skimping no details, you couldn’t help but hold back laughter. She spoke as if she were a professor teaching a class, and you did your best to keep a straight face as she yammered on with her shoddy reasoning, deep down knowing she only picked a rabbit because of how cute they are.

After she was done waxing poetic about bunnies, she continued scouring the book, coming to a halt once she reached the wild cat section. She stopped with a gasp, beaming up at you as she pressed her finger firmly against one of the images on the page.

“Mommy this one is you!”

Your eyes traveled to the picture she was rapidly tapping, “An African Wildcat, huh?” You smirked down at the little girl in amusement, “Why did you pick that one for me?”

“Because it looks just like you!”

You chuckled at her enthusiasm, “It looks like me? How so?”

“It has marks just like you do!”

Her innocuous words sent a chill up your spine. Eying the stripes that crossed the cat’s legs, you felt a great unease begin to overtake your body. Her reasoning was not lost on you, the cats coat did quite resemble the jagged scars that covered nearly every inch of your body, and just like the feline in her book, your limbs were the most prominent location of said ‘markings’. You quickly shook your head, not wanting to dwell on it further. In hopes of moving on from the subject, the outpouring of words that flew from your mouth were jumbled and messy.

“O-oh, I see,” you stuttered, clearing your throat to steady your voice, “well you certainly picked a cute animal for me! Thank you baby, it was a good choice.”

She smiled at you innocently, a gesture that usually made your heart melt with affection. But as her tiny hands moved from the book to your arms, that smile did nothing but fill you with dread, the realization that you wouldn’t be getting out of this sticky situation hitting you like a brick to the face. 

“Yeah mommy, the kitty’s marks are just like these ones,” her stubby fingers gently traced the old wounds, a look of reverence reflected on her cherubic features. “They make you look like that kitty mommy,” her little voice cooed, “I like them a lot!”

Your muscles constricted at her words, a slight tremor coursing through you as you involuntarily tightened your grip on her. She took note of this, looking up at your strained features with a puzzled expression on her face.

“Don’t be sad mommy,” she spoke assuredly, “I really do like them! I think they are pretty!”

Her words burned you, scorching the inside of your frozen shell of a body, leaving you feeling sickly and discombobulated. The room around you started to spin in a hazy blur, a wave of nausea making you nearly wretch. Your breathing grew erratic as you tried to calm yourself, inwardly repeating that your daughter was just a child, a little girl barely four years of age who had an incredibly limited view of the world. Her words were not meant to upset you. Her opinions were coming from a place of total naivety.

Yet still, the mental assurance did little to help with the extremely uncomfortable position you now founds yourself in. It wasn’t as if this was her first time noticing your scars. She had mentioned them before, her curious mind trying to piece together the reason that her arms appeared different from your own. Each time she brought your old wounds up you couldn’t help but feel flustered, responding with weak explanations and misdirection to try and quickly brush off her questioning.

The marks came from a silly mistake, or a childhood accident, or from a careless moment when mommy should have been paying more attention. It was always excuses on repeat. How many lies had you told her on this topic alone?

But even if they were lies, it beat telling her the truth. You didn’t want to have to explain where the scars on your body actually came from to anyone, let alone a child, and especially not to your own daughter. How could you possibly word it gently, or in a way that she would understand, when you barely understood why you had them yourself? How could you look her in the eye and tell her that these markings were a permanent sign that you had been very, very hurt and that it was her own fathers hands that inflicted the pain?

Reliving the horrific moments that left your body in such a state was overwhelming enough on its own, but to also have to lay bare her father’s sins, relay to her the unsavory proclivities of a man who she idolized and adored, was not something you were keen on doing.

She didn’t know her daddy like you knew him. She was ignorant to the constant state of concern you lived in, unaware of the worries that plagued your mind and kept you up each night. All the troubles of the hell she had been born into were completely lost on the small, carefree girl.

But honestly that was for the best. You had made an unspoken promise the moment she entered your life that you would protect her no matter what. From the day of her birth onward it became your mission to keep her as happy and healthy as possible.

Ren had broken you, but she did not have to suffer the same fate.

At this point in her life, your daughter knew nothing of her daddy’s profession or ‘hobbies’, and you wanted it to remain that way for as long as possible, if not for the rest of her life. You dreaded each time Ren came home from an auction, terrified he may let casually slip too many details about his ‘lively client’ or that he would carelessly step through the door with the stains of his liaisons still littering his clothes. Your daughter was at an age where she was brimming with questions, and she was relentless in getting answers to each question she asked. Everything had to be explained in complete detail for her to be satisfied, drop the subject, and move on. She was a smart little thing, possibly too smart for her own good. You highly doubted a silly joke or wave of the hand would assuage her whirring mind should Ren grow too impetuous in her presence.

And should her questioning become too pesky, you fretted over what Ren’s reaction to it may be. The more you tried to avoid thinking about it the more you seemed to fixate on the topic, pondering just how much goading it would take from your daughter before his temper would rear its ugly head.  You, above anyone, had firsthand experience in just how volatile the man could be, the scars that littered your body a testament to his turbulent emotions and violent outbursts.

Looking back on it now, it’s a wonder you survived any of it at all.

Ren often told you he loved you, each confession spoken through honeyed words that spilled from his lips easily and often.  And while you didn’t doubt those words (you knew better than to, at this point), you also knew his sweet nothings weren’t merely a term of endearment, they also served as your curse. He loved you, but he also loved your fealty to him, your adoration and worship of him and only him. Should you not reciprocate his feelings as quickly or ardently as he expected, the mere thought of whatever punishment he would concoct was enough to send you into a debilitating panic attack.

There were few things he loathed more than when you flinched from his affection or if you exhibited any sign of distress towards his presence, especially after he had spent so many years going above and beyond to provide for you, devote himself to you. You had learned early on to keel any feelings of aversion you had to his advances, several of your more prominent scars a brutal reminder of that misstep alone.

 If your daughter uncovered the truth and saw her father for who he truly was, if she began to fear him the way you feared him, how would he respond?  If not only his partner, but his own daughter started shying away from him, what length would he go to to correct this behavior?

Dwelling on it made your skin crawl.

But perhaps all of your worries were asinine. Despite his inclination for cruelty, Ren had never so much as raised a hand towards your daughter, even when she did act up. If anything, he was overprotective of her, barely letting her move faster than a brisk jog lest she fall and hurt herself. He hated seeing his little girl experience even a modicum of physical pain, mentioning to you previously that were he able, he’d keep her locked up in a padded room all day and night to prevent any foreseeable accidents or injuries. Surely it was just his idea of a joke, but the insinuation still made you cringe.

It was almost comical, just how greatly the manifestation of his affection for her differed from how he showed his love for you.

His domineering nature shielded her from experiencing any true pain. Every scrape, bruise, and cut she ever received was superficial, nothing that caused major bleeding or left a lasting impression. She had no way of knowing what had been done to you to cause the scars that marred your form, the torment and hell you experienced with each slash, smack, burn. Hell, she probably didn’t even really understand what a scar actually was. All she knew was that her mommy and daddy had strange marks on their skin that didn’t follow any kind of set pattern, weird jagged lines and indents that her soft skin was curiously free from. The mystery of it all was as puzzling to her young mind as it was enticing.

However, some mysteries were best left unsolved, and just as with each other time she brought up this hot topic, you found yourself unable to look into her clear, bright eyes and tell her any semblance of the truth. She may have been forced upon you, but she was your daughter. You loved her, and you refused to be the one to shatter her innocence. You would keep her ignorant for as long as possible, shielding her to the endless nightmare of your daily lives, even if it cost you your sanity.

“Mommy,” her voice jarred you, dragging you from your thoughts, “mommy did you hear me? I said I think they are pretty!”

“T-that’s… I…” You stuttered, struggling to find the right words to say, your voice coming out much smaller than you intended it to. The room felt like it had dropped thirty degrees, your body twitching in response to the sudden chill.

“Daddy told me he gave some of them to you, like this one,” her pudgy, cold finger pressed into the faded heart that resided on your chest, the first of many indelible sins he had etched onto your form. Only the top half of the carved symbol was viewable above the collar of your shirt, so she tugged at the loose hem until she could see it in its horrible entirety.

“Daddy said he gave you this one because he loves you so much,” her voice grew quiet, a thoughtful look in her eye as they drank in wounds you wished you could forget, “Daddy loves me too, right mommy? You think he’ll give me a cute heart someday too?”

You felt as if you had been hit by a train.

“S-top,” the words were forced from your throat, airy and breathless, as if someone was wringing your neck to make them come out, “p-please, just stop talking.”

“What did you say mama,” your daughters sing-song voice responded as her fingers continued to trace and prod your scars, “You are whispering, is it a secret?”

“I told you to SHUT UP!”

As if following your command, your booming voice instantly silenced the small girl. Unused to such a violent outburst from her mother, her happy-go-lucky nature quickly shifted to one of alert, her tiny body going rigid as she stared up at you with fearful eyes.

Seeing her in such a state and knowing that you were the cause of it would normally have killed you inside, making you fall to your knees to beg for the child’s forgiveness. But right now, the thin thread that had been holding you together had snapped, and your words rushed out in a torrent you couldn’t begin to quell.

“Shut up, shut up, shut UP!” You seethed, clasping your hands to your ears to try and block out your own intrusive voice, “Just STOP TALKING about it! What are you even saying? Why would you ever want to look like this?!”

Tears started to flood your eyes, blurring the image of the girl who had quickly jumped from your lap and was now cowering before you. Through your bleary vision, you could see tears were brimming her eyes as well.

“You… You have no idea,” your voice warbled, shaking in equal parts grief and frustration, “You have no clue what you are saying, so just STOP IT. KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT AND DON’T YOU DARE SPEAK OF IT AGAIN!”

You slunk from the chair down to the floor, burying your face in your cold, stiff hands. The soft blubbering of your daughter could be heard through your own sobbing.

“I-I’m sorry mommy. I didn’t mean to make you cry.”

Hearing her broken voice began to shatter the spell you had been under, instant regret jerking you roughly back to reality. Your head sunk lower, your body scrunching itself up as tightly as possible to hide from this cruel reality.

Your screams were born from deeply buried feelings of hatred, tucked far, far away as a means of self-preservation. For a moment, you felt as if you despised your daughter, her existence tethering you to this wretched excuse of a life, binding you irrevocably to Ren. But as you lifted your heavy head, glancing up to stare into her young face, a face so very similar to your own, a face contorted in panic and sadness over her mother’s abrupt descent into madness… you realized it wasn’t her that you hated.

It was yourself.

Your daughter didn’t deserve this. She deserved normalcy. She deserved a father that didn’t pose a threat to her. She deserved a mother that wasn’t ruined by his hands. She deserved a happy and untroubled life, not to be stuck being raised in a barbed cage, navigating her way through life with nothing but the shattered remains of a battered woman to guide her.

“I’m so sorry,” you choked under the weight of your overwhelming emotions, snot and tears running freely down your ruddy cheeks and chin, “I’m so, so sorry baby…”

“What the hell is going on?”

You hadn’t heard the front door open, nor had you heard Ren’s jubilant greeting as he entered your home. He had no doubt been upset by the lack of welcome-it was one thing to be ignored by a child, but his doting wife? That was not something he was not apt to look past.

But surely any feelings of annoyance or frustration fled from his mind the moment he entered the room, his eyes falling upon your crumpled, messy form collapsed on the floor. You cursed his arrival, upset that he entered the scene at such a compromising time, right as you were struggling to regain an ounce of composure and properly apologize to the little girl who had done nothing wrong.

“D-daddy,” your daughter’s voice warbled as she barreled towards him, colliding into his waiting embrace. You wiped at your face in a desperate attempt to hide your previous outpouring of emotions, doing your best to avoid eye contact with Ren as his sharp gaze quickly flicked from you, to his daughter.

This had already become enough of a scene without Ren’s interference, it was best to try and begin damage control now. 

“Daddy I-I made mommy cry!” Tears continued to pour from your daughter’s eyes, her face twisting into a look of pure dismay. Her misguided admission of guilt made you recoil, knowing full well it would grant her no favors with the person she seeking comfort from. “I’m really sorry daddy! I didn’t mean to!”

After several endless seconds of silence, Ren spoke.

“… You made her cry?”

His voice was far sharper than it needed to be, further agitating the precarious state of affairs. In most cases he would have offered your daughter leniency, letting her get away with far more than she probably should. However that leniency was null and void if you ended up suffering in the process.  Ren could not forgive anyone that caused you any duress (himself, of course, being the exemption) even if that person was his own flesh and blood.

“What do you mean you made her cry? What the hell did you do to her?”

“I-I don’t know,” she wailed, a fresh wave of tears spurred on by the accusatory tone of her father’s voice, “I just told mommy I thought her marks were pretty and then she started crying! I wasn’t lying daddy, I like them! I think they make mommy look really pretty!”

“Her marks…?” Ren’s look of vexation began to dissipate as the meaning of her words donned on him. He lifted his arm, rolling up his sleeve to reveal his own scars to the little girl. Pointing a clawed finger to them, he leaned down until he was looking her in the eye, “You mean like these?”

As she nodded her head vigorously in confirmation, Ren tutted, “That’s the reason for all the water works? An innocent compliment started all this fussing?” He scoffed, shaking his head, “Isn’t that a little bit… silly?

You tensed at the sound of his barking laugh, your frown deepening as an amused grin spread wider across his lips. You wished that you could say it was shocking for him to have such disregard after finding the two of you in such an agitated state, but it was painfully in character of him to shrug off your misery and suffering as inconsequential.  How he could so nonchalantly normalize this hellish situation he kept you and your child ensnared in, you would never understand.

Your daughter was apparently sharing similar thoughts, as her face began to once more morph into a pre-sobbing scowl. She was no doubt wounded that her father was not offering her the comfort she was seeking, her emotional state already greatly weakened by her mother’s venomous tantrum.

To help quell another round of tears, Ren pulled the child closer, wrapping her up in his arms so that her tiny form was nearly enveloped by him.  “Shhh, no more tears angel,” he cooed sweetly, patting her head gently to appease her, “There isn’t any reason to cry, especially because… Well, you’re right! Mommy’s whole body is pretty, isn’t it? Her marks just compliment the beauty that’s already there.”

Slowly but surely, her tears began to dissipate. Hunched over shoulders loosened, and sniffles and hiccups gave way to even breathing. Like clockwork, her father’s gentle handling soothed her, the same touch that destroyed you offering her salvation.

As if under a spell, the turmoil that had overcome your daughter quickly began to vanish, her sobbing fading into quiet sniffles. Once she was fully calmed, Ren continued speaking, “That’s all you meant to say to mommy, right angel? I’m sorry she took it the wrong way, she’s probably just tired or hungry, you know how mommy gets. She’ll get over it in no time flat!”

Heat spread through your body at his flippant dismissal of your feelings, an indignant blush lighting your cheeks as you gripped your hands tightly at your side. Your previous emotional episode left you all but drained, but your will to fight back against his callous commentary could never truly be contained.

“In fact, I bet she is already over it now,” Ren’s voice took on a jovial tone as he directed his focus solely on you, “Aren’t you, pumpkin?”

With the ball suddenly in your court, you flinched as both sets of expectant eyes fell on you. Your own eyes darted from Ren’s piercing glare, down to your daughter’s wide-eyed look of unbridled hope. You felt much like the rabbit that had been caught by the fox, stuck in a lose-lose situation. Seeing him hunched over her small body as she clutched to him as a life line, openly concerned that her mother may once more reject her while her father remained a bastion of strength and understanding, left you reeling. Either you would get heated again and stay the villain, but possibly hold on to an ounce of your dignity, or concede to Ren and have yet another piece of your soul wither away and die-the price to pay so that your daughter could remain in blissful ignorance for another day.

“Aren’t you, pumpkin?” He repeated himself slowly, enunciating each word. The kindness in his voice serving only as a mask for the threat buried beneath.

“Y-yes,” you responded quickly, shooting them both a smile you hoped was convincing, “I am very sorry, baby. Daddy is right. Mommy is just… tired.”

A serene smile lit her face, your words placating her. Seeing her happy once more helped relieve a bit of the ache in your own heart, making the lie worth it.

“Good, good,” Ren affirmed with a nod, carefully detaching himself from your daughter as he stood, “but you know little one, mommy deserves some love too, don’t you think? She may have been in the wrong, but it’s not nice to make her cry like that. Why don’t you go give her a hug, hm?”

With no further persuading necessary, she quickly padded over to you, hopping on your lap with so much enthusiasm that it nearly knocked the wind from you. Her arms tightly latched around your torso as she smushed her face into your chest, rubbing it back and forth like she was trying to burrow beneath your skin.

“I love you mommy,” her voice spoke clearly, any hint of previous sadness long gone. You sighed, relieved that this dramatic chapter was over as you pulled your daughter closer to you.

“I love you too.”

During this show of affection, Ren had made his way behind you, slinking so deftly you hadn’t even known he had moved until you heard him chuckle softly behind you.

“This is what I like to see,” he spoke with a sickeningly dreamy sigh, “nothing makes me happier than when my two girls are happy.”

He placed his hands gingerly atop your shoulders, trailing them down until they rested on your arms. His thumbs pressed gently against the marred skin, rubbing in a small circular motion in an attempt to subdue you. His claws grazed your flesh, uncomfortably scratching against you as they snagged against your skin.

He planted a firm and lingering kiss to the side of your head, pulling away just enough that his lips grazed the shell of your ear. “There really was nothing to cry about,” he whispered breathily, his words quiet enough that despite your daughters’ proximity, she would have no chance of hearing them. “It’s almost unfair how gorgeous you are, scars and all. But you must know that, right my sweet pet? I tell you all the time.”

Ren took in a deep breath, releasing it in a shaky sigh, “Seeing these scars reminds me of all we have been through, all that we share. They are a symbol of our bond.”

One of his claws pressed down sharply, a small bead of blood pooling around the piercing. Leisurely he began to drag his finger up your arm, a thin red line following in its wake. You shivered at the burning sensation, but deigned to give him any reaction further than that.

“Don’t forget pumpkin, these pretty marks are a reminder of my constant love for you.” He chuckled softly, peppering a few kisses to the back of your neck while his claws slowly sunk deeper, “And right now I am feeling  terribly sentimental, so for old times’ sake, why don’t I add a few more to remind you just how precious to me you are~?”

[cerisesparadise]

still with you ㅡ park jongseong

genre - romantic drama, contemporary romance, lovers to exes (to lovers again? I’ll let you guys decide <3), slight angst?

pairing - idol ex bf!jay x fem!reader

warnings - none? It’s quite nostalgic and melancholic, fitting to the rainy fall weather (and this week’s theme on bjnet!) does an open ending count? (definitely does for me lol) - lmk if I should add any!

wc -  2.1k

synopsis - In a cosy café where they once shared quiet moments, she now sits alone, missing Jay—an artist whose career has skyrocketed since they mutually parted ways. Though she supports him from afar, she can’t help but wonder: is their story truly over, or is there still a way back to each other?

a/n - hii! welcome to my first official post under bjnet! this week’s theme is “A rainy day”, and since it’s been pouring this whole week, my rainy days playlist came back. On shuffle, Jungkook's Still With You started playing–my absolute favourite song–so I was inspired to write about Jay! Hopefully the weather’s been better for you guys, and enjoy reading! | bookshelf

The rain drummed softly against the café windows, each drop cascading down the glass like tiny rivers tracing a path to nowhere. It was one of those quiet, overcast afternoons when time seemed to slow, and the world outside became a blur of muted colours. Inside the café, the warmth of freshly brewed coffee and the soft murmur of low conversation wrapped around you, but none of it reached deep enough to distract you from the thoughts swirling in your mind.

You sat at the same table by the window, your fingers tracing invisible lines on the surface, where your books used to lie scattered. Back then, this corner had felt like your own private world—yours and Jay's. You could almost see it now, like a film playing out in front of you. He would sit across from you, his notebook open, guitar resting against the chair. Sometimes he’d hum under his breath, scribbling down lyrics, lost in the melodies that only existed in his mind until he could give them life.

You, on the other hand, were always hunched over textbooks and notes, eyes heavy with focus but heart light with the simple joy of being near him. The two of you didn’t always talk; sometimes, hours would pass in comfortable silence, with only the soft scrape of pen on paper or the occasional tap of a key on his laptop breaking the quiet. But it was a silence you cherished—a language all its own, one that spoke of contentment and understanding.

That was before.

Now, you were alone in that same café, staring out at the rain-soaked streets, lost in the bittersweet haze of what was, and what could have been. The weight of the empty chair across from you seemed heavier today, more tangible. Maybe it was the weather, or maybe it was the song softly playing over the café’s speakers—one of his. The familiar notes tugged at something deep inside you, each lyric a reminder of the memories you still carried.

You missed him.

You missed the way his voice would gently pull you out of your thoughts when he caught you zoning out during a study session, the way his eyes crinkled when he smiled at you from across the table, as if to say, I'm here, I'm with you. You missed the way he would sneak a lyric or a phrase into his songs that only you would recognize, something small, something that connected just the two of you in a world where he was meant to belong to everyone.

But life had demanded more of him than just this corner of a café, more than just you. It had demanded his passion, his ambition, his heart. And you had your own path to follow. He was chasing his dream—music, the one constant in his life since long before he had met you. And you had your own dreams too, though they felt a little lonelier now. The decision to part ways hadn’t been easy for either of you, but it had been mutual. Logical, even. You both had careers to build, lives to shape. And you knew, deep down, that holding each other back wasn’t fair.

It wasn’t fair, but that didn’t make it hurt any less.

Some days were easier than others. You kept busy with your studies, threw yourself into projects and assignments, and told yourself that this was how it had to be. That it was right. You still believed that. You both deserved to chase the things that made you feel alive. But there were days—days like today—when you’d find yourself back here, sitting at the same table, looking out at the rain and wondering.

Wondering if it was all worth it.

You watched the raindrops slide down the window, each one chasing the other, much like your thoughts. There was a time when you believed that no matter what life threw at you, the two of you could weather it together. But then the opportunities came knocking for him—the tours, the interviews, the endless nights spent in the studio. He had made it. You watched him rise, his name lighting up stages and screens, his music reaching people in ways he had always dreamed of.

And you? You cheered him on. Always. From the shadows, from a distance. Every time you saw his name in the headlines or his face on your feed, a small, proud smile would tug at your lips. That was your Jay up there, living the dream you had seen him work so hard for. You had always known he had it in him. And now the world did too.

But what the world didn’t see was the quiet ache that lived in the spaces between. They didn’t see the way your heart clenched every time his voice filled the room, reminding you of the nights you spent here, when his music was just for you. They didn’t see the way you’d trace the letters of his name absentmindedly, lost in thought, wondering if he still thought of you too.

But sitting here now, with only the rain and the memories, you couldn’t help but wonder if you had made the right choice. You had promised yourself you wouldn’t think like that, wouldn’t let yourself slip into that spiral of what ifs—but it was hard. Hard not to believe, deep down, that you were supposed to be together. That despite everything, despite the distance, despite the lives you were building separately, you should have found a way to make it work.

A sigh escaped your lips as you picked up your coffee, now lukewarm, and took a small sip. The bitterness matched the mood settling over you, but it was a familiar comfort. The door to the café opened, and you looked up instinctively, your heart fluttering in your chest, just for a moment. There was always that sliver of hope, wasn’t there? That maybe, by some twist of fate, he would walk in. That the universe would bring him back to this table, to you.

But it wasn’t him. It never was. You smiled at yourself ruefully, shaking your head at the foolishness of it. Jay wasn’t coming back—not in the way you hoped, anyway. His path was set, and so was yours.

And yet, a part of you would always be here, in this café, waiting. Waiting for the impossible, for something that felt unfinished, unresolved. You could support him from a distance, as you always had. You could celebrate his successes, take pride in his accomplishments, cheer him on silently from the sidelines. But there would always be this ache, this quiet longing for the life you imagined, the one where you didn’t have to choose between love and dreams.

The rain continued to fall, a steady, rhythmic patter against the glass. And as you sat there, lost in thought, you knew that no matter how far apart your lives grew, no matter how much time passed, a part of you would always be with him. Just as he had said once, a long time ago, when things were simpler: “I’m still with you, even when I’m not.”

And in some ways, you still were too. Always with him.

As you continue to sit there, lost in the rhythm of the raindrops against the window, the café seems to melt away, taking you further into the labyrinth of your memories. You could still hear his laugh, feel the warmth of his hand when he’d reach out to touch yours, grounding you in the moment.

But now, that warmth is gone, replaced by the distant hum of the café, the clinking of mugs, the murmur of people around you. You sigh for the nth time, gripping your coffee cup tighter as if holding onto something that was never meant to stay.

Suddenly, a familiar voice breaks through the soft chatter. You blink, snapping out of your thoughts. It’s coming from the café’s radio–a voice you’d recognise anywhere. Jay’s voice. Your breath catches in your throat, heart pounding as the barista turns the volume up just a bit. You hadn’t heard his voice this way in months, not like this–so close, so familiar.

“...and that was Jay Park’s latest single, Still With You, topping the charts yet again. An instant hit since its release, fans are raving about the emotional depth and the heartfelt lyrics. We actually have Jay with us on the line. Jay, congratulations! Can you tell us a little more about the song?”

Your chest tightens, and you sit up a little straighter, pulse racing. Still With you? That can’t be. That was your song. The one he’d written in this very café, the one he’d promised was for you. He’d never intended to release it, or at least, you thought he wouldn’t–especially after the two of you had parted ways. But here it was, playing on the radio for the entire world to hear.

You lean forward, your heart pounding louder than the rain as Jay’s voice comes through the speakers again, soft but steady, like a familiar embrace.

“I wrote this song a while back… for someone special in my life,” he begins, his tone thoughtful. “She was… she still is special, even though she’s not by my side anymore. Without her, I wouldn’t be where I am now. I wouldn’t have found the courage to chase this dream. So I guess this song is my way of saying thank you… and maybe hoping for another chance. I don’t know if she’ll ever hear it, but—” He pauses, and for a moment, you could almost imagine him looking down, smiling softly the way he used to. “—I hope she’s still out there somewhere, hoping for another chance at love, just like I am.”

The radio host fills the silence with congratulations and questions about his tour, but you’re no longer listening. The world around you seems to blur, fading into the background as your heart races in your chest. His words echo in your mind, crashing over you like the rain against the window.

“She’s still special. I hope she’s still out there, hoping for another chance. Just like I am”

Jay. The song, the message—it was for you. It had always been for you.

The rain outside felt heavier now, or maybe it was just your pulse beating in your ears, drowning out everything else. You pressed a hand to your chest, trying to steady yourself, but it was impossible to ignore the sudden rush of emotion rising inside you. He hadn’t forgotten. Even after all this time, all the distance, he hadn’t let go. He was still thinking of you, still hoping, just as you had been, quietly, all this time.

Could this be it?

For a moment, you wondered if this was the sign you’d been waiting for—the universe’s way of telling you that maybe, despite everything, your story wasn’t over yet. It felt surreal–like something out of a dream. Jay, the one person you couldn’t forget, was reaching out, even if he didn’t know it.

You glanced out at the rain-soaked street beyond the café window, your reflection staring back at you with wide eyes and a heart full of questions. Could it really be that after all this time, Jay was still waiting for another chance? And more importantly, were you ready to find out?

The rain continued to fall, but for the first time in a long while, it didn’t feel so heavy. Instead, it felt like the beginning of something—something you weren’t quite sure of yet, but something that made your heart beat just a little faster.

You inhaled sharply, trying to ground yourself. Was this the sign you had been waiting for? A second chance? You had been so convinced that your story with Jay had ended, but now–now, it felt as if the universe was pulling you back together, one note at a time.

You stood up slowly, gathering your things, mind racing with thoughts of what to do next. Maybe today, you’d just walk home. Maybe tomorrow, you’d listen to his song again, really listen. And maybe, just maybe, you’d find the courage to reach out.

But for now, the café door opened with a soft chime, and you stepped out into the rain—unsure of where it would lead you, but feeling, for the first time in a long time, like the world had offered you a possibility.

A possibility of a second chance.

© cerisesheaven — please do not plagiarize, repost, translate, copy, or alter any of my works. thank you angel!

[prettyandpadded]

How did u start wearing diapers

being a kinkster :P my story is long and complicated but the TLDR is: its not a joke anymore

LOLOL i fell in love with diapers through ABDreams, i got to be diapered by the best. Maybe I'll post the polaroid that made me kinda fall in love with IJR. He literally just exuded Daddy energy to me, and I was like, damn, can i please take a photo of you diapering me? and from there..... well. its been over a year now since then. I fell down the rabbit hole. I started getting ABDL customs, so maybe its true, at the beginning, i did wear my first diaper for money. But I always understood the kink aspect. I always was turned on and am always turned on by the idea of pleasing people, making them horny, unleashing fantasies. IJR and I ended up having a connection, and he ordered me cases and cases of pink northshores. I used them all, editing my porn from my other side of my life, that honestly, i hated. i was pretending i was someone i wasnt. The more he posted me on ABDreams, the more he'd post me on twitter, and id start getting more customs surrounding ABDL. I got one, where the premise was me not being able to hold it and letting loose in the diaper. I film alone, and, I touched myself, alone, in a hot, wet diaper, and it just all clicked. I started using my vibrator, rubbing against and on the diaper and then took it off, had it underneath me with the tapes off, and came. And here i am, over a year later, fully diaper brained. Just how i should be. In the words of my baby Jojo, "so, you always were a little, you just didnt know HOW little." and thats so true, i was always buying nostalgic things and regressing, i just didnt know that this community was even a fuckin option. and now that it is, HELLO! i love it here. i love diapers, i love being a baby, i love playing in little space, i love the sexual aspects of it, i love the non sexual aspects of it, im a 100% fuckin SWITCH like, at the flip of a coin ;P, and LMAO, im a fuckin diaper gooner lol.

thats how i started wearing diapers. lol

[intheholler]

what do you think of all of the people being scared of appalachia? i don't know if this is recent or not, but currently i've been seeing a ton of shit online like "never go to the appalachian mountains, it's so dangerous", and i just don't understand it. my family's lived in appalachia for forever, and none of us have experienced anything paranormal or endangering to us. you're one of my favorite blogs on here and i'd just like to hear your thoughts on it

first off, it means a lot that i'm one of your favorite blogs and im really happy i can contribute something to your experience here :') thanks so much for being here <333

but ok so.

my thoughts on it are many. it's been bothering me a long time and i've been meaning to get it off my chest. this will be long and probably ranty, so it won't hurt my feelings if anyone skims lol

lemme preface this little diatribe by saying the obvious: folklore is an integral part of any culture. the mythos of a place/people is tied directly to their histories and unique experiences and struggles and they are enriching. this is true of appalachia too.

oral folk traditions especially are incredibly historically appalachian.

i mentioned in a post i made yesterday about murder ballads, how the purpose of these was to warn kids away from doing dumb shit and getting lost in the hollers--falling down cliffs n mineshafts and shit at night. gettin got by wildlife.

it spooked us safe. they served a purpose, and once you got old enough to realize they're as real as the tooth fairy, they just become enjoyable and nostalgic. because they're you're culture.

probably every mountain kid has stories about haints n boogers that were told to them by their grandparents, and they grow up to tell them to their own kids, and so on. some of it stuck with me because i grew up with the folklore.

by that i mean, i'm a whole 31 year old woman and i still avoid looking out a dark window at night cause it gives me the shivers. i still get spooked when i hear a big cat yowling in the woods. but the difference is i know there's not really haints out there crying--it's just a product of my childhood. ghost stories are fun.

the problem comes in when someone outside the culture gets their hands on appalachian oral folk traditions. then, it becomes a familiar problem: outsiders cherry picking appalachia and harming us with the mess they make rifling through it all.

it's all about the surface level and the visuals. they all love a good aesthetic blog, run by some local from out west or some shit who's never stepped foot here.

but as soon as the spooky photo filters come off and the real life marginalized person is left standing there just out of frame, we go back to being disgusting examples of what not to be. decrepit churches n buildings are aesthetic and quirky until they stop being on a pinterest board, and then they just become damning images of an impoverished region who deserves to be laughed at.

now, not to holler 'splain you--this is more for anyone not from here who might read this: it's been a systemic issue for decades; there were literal government campaigns to demonize us to the rest of the nation so they could garner support to cut into our mountains and exploit our labor and resources.

well, they were fuckin successful, and we have been falsely made out to be this homogenous nightmare of a place--"welfare exploiting" maga country who deserves everything we get, and nothing we don't.

by going so far as to take appalachian folklore that we tell each other and picking out the "aesthetic" stuff--the haints and general paranormal--they are pruning what they like from our culture--the safe things, like ghost stories--for their own aesthetic use.

but not only that, they are using it to demonize us… yet again.

'appalachia is scary. it's full of things that will kill you. don't look out the window at night cause a booger will get you.' only they don't call them boogers cause they ain't even from here. ask them what a haint is and they'll ask if u mispelled 'haunt.'

it gets even worse when you consider that so much of it has roots in native american culture, and how that continues to be exploited and misrepresented.

i'm not even innocent of that. a while back i had to check myself because i made a comment on here about ~spooky appalachia~ ignorant to the fact that what i was commenting on was actually a deeply important cultural and spiritual element to local indigenous tribes. my comments were harmful by my failure to educate myself and know better, thereby saying things carelessly.

my point being--i'm from the area. i should have known better.

when outsiders start saying the kind of shit they say about what they think they hear in the woods without even knowing where such an idea comes from, they're disrespecting a displaced, abused and exploited people, harming real cultures just for clicks without even knowing. that's on top of the damage they're doing to greater appalachia.

it's fuckin gross.

i think my favorite one i ever seen was this middle aged white lady going through her pristine mcmansion somewhere in suburbia, pulling the million curtains and locking the million doors, going "nighttime routine in appalachia!! 🤪🤪"

i could be wrong about this particular person--i didn't check their other tiktoks because im sick of them accounts and tired of giving them the benefit of the doubt--but it immediately came off as a transplant because:

1) mcmansion, 2) i dont know nobody here that locks their shit down like that (not locking up could even be argued as a part of my local culture, a reflection of our deep sense of community and trust in our neighbors).

and then the comments was all like "i don't know how you guys live there" and it actually broke my heart and pissed me off because even if--especially if--you're one of us, why the fuck are you harming us for likes? why are you turning people against us in a brand new way?

and to the transplants that do this--why?

you're not even from here, you moved here to this place you hate and made it worse just so your front porch would have a nice view, and are now benefiting socially from perpetuating bullshit about us?

you buy up all the land, land we often had no choice but to sell in the first place to survive instead of passing it on to our families, land we originally took from the indigenous peoples your content comes from.

you overdevelop it and turn it unrecognizable to make it more like the comfortable cities you come from. you gut a mountain town of its local businesses and cultures, you price people out of their homes...

...and then once you settle in all cozy like, you go tell everyone else how scary it is? how you can't trust the hills? like it's a cool paranormal bravery badge to wear? fuck off entirely.

so idk, in short my personal thoughts are: i personally enjoy a little myth as a treat, because the folklore is a part of the gothic, a part of our culture and a part of my childhood. i don't (intentionally) wield it as a weapon or use it as a pedestal to get the weird brand of attention that people like them are after.

and those who do this can get got by them haints for all i care.

[owollene]

2015 called, they want their unofficial Disney princess back 😪✨

First post of 2025 and I had to draw my beloved star butterfly after a whole decade of the show being out which is absolutely insane to me. I wanted to test my skills so show off my improvement since then (hence the old art jumpscare in the third panel lol.) I missed my daughter much it was so nostalgic drawing her again after so long, I hope to carry on her memory in my heart for years to come 🥺💕

[intramoon]

hi aj !! i have a question i dont want to sound rude please know im not trying to be rude. i came back to simblr after a long time and its been really hard not to get discouraged. :/ my account is really dead no one interacts with me anymore. stuff is so different. i remember you used to be kinda popular but how do you deal with people not interacting with you as much as they used to?? i dont mean that in a mean way!! i dont want to quit simblr but idk how to get back to how things were

Hi! Don't worry, I don't think you're being rude, I understand where you're coming from. ♡ My response will be long because I have a lot to say about the topic, hopefully, it will help you.

If you were mostly active when I was in my "prime" (assuming that's what you mean by "kinda popular"), like 2018-2021, things will never be how they were then. The community, trends, and how we interacted with each other was so much different, I don't think it will ever go back to how it was then. I am kind of happy about that. Although my relationship with that time on Simblr is nostalgic (despite being too young and miserable to enjoy it), I think the community is in a healthier place now (mostly). I have had to adjust to a couple of things since coming back. One is that the content looks different now.

In my "prime" people were just getting into editing (that was a time before ReShade). Heavy editing and experimental editing were really celebrated, partly because everyone was learning and learning from each other. We just wanted to see what was possible. Now, maybe partly in reaction to that trend and how demanding it was, people have found an appreciation for the base game, simple screenshots with really only ReShade/gshade, CAS screenshots, etc. Not to say the former doesn't exist anymore because it absolutely does and people have become truly incredible at it. In some regard, it is an acquired taste especially if that's all you do. I've thought to myself many times should I stop editing the way I do, does that impact the way people take in my content? Do I have editing blindness? lol I like how I edit, I enjoy the process and, even if I do have editing blindness, I like how it looks. Even being an alpha creator, they are fewer and fewer as people opt for MM and MMix. I've thought, do people really not like alpha content anymore? Even my story at times felt like it didn't fit into the current story ethos. I thought about stopping it. I bring that all up to say, when you're coming back to a very different Simblr it can feel like what you used to make doesn't "fit in". And it might not. I don't think that should be the goal. The community now is so much more diverse, content-wise, that anything you want to make is possible. If you sacrifice your artistic vision, you'll end up leaving again. You have to make what speaks to you, regardless of the other noise.

Two, you have to find your reason for making your art. For a moment, I really lost touch with what I was even doing here. I took some time to figure it out. I first started because I wanted to tell a story that talked about intimacy through the lens of a sex worker and someone who had no romantic or sexual experience. I wanted to do this without over-sexualizing my sex worker character and infantilizing my other character. I wanted to write some of the dialogue I was having internally. Way back when that was all I wanted to do, I didn't struggle with being seen as much because I was posting with a purpose. That purpose wasn't likes or reblogs, but to tell a story and have a conversation. Everything else came after. Anyone coming back (or looking for a reason to stay) has to find, within themselves, why they want to be here and what they want to get out of it. I promise you if you reconnect with that, posting will be easier regardless of the outcome.

I know I took a lot for granted way back when. Asks about me or my characters, comments, tags, and even people wanting to join me in a Discord server or stream. Sounds like we both, a one point, wish we could go back. That just means it's something to appreciate more now. You can be and make really whatever you want, which wasn't always possible. Maybe think of coming back as a small rebirth and trust that if you keep at it, you will find your people. I am still in the process of finding mine but I trust they are out there. If you're passionate people will feel it. Best of luck and I hope something in this novel helps you! ♡

[everestgale]

Long Post about EG's Voice Designs

Unrelated Hero being adorable just so above-cut is not all text lol

Gale woke up one morning, felt nostalgic, and wanted to ramble. Therefore, Gale decided to ramble about their voice designs.

Warning: this will be a very long, just barely coherent post, where I just talk about the evolution of my voice designs. It will include a lot of old art, sketches, and side tangents. More than anything, this is for me to look back on later, if I ever need to do that or feel like doing that.

[Post-writing EG: …uh, it's like 2000+ words worth of ramble. You've been warned.]

So, I guess I'll start at the very beginning, should I?

From the very beginning, back when I was just getting into Slay the Princess, I knew that I wanted my voices to resemble The Long Quiet as much as possible, which meant that I very quickly settled on a humanoid bird-folk with a mouthless face as the base of my designs. I knew I wouldn't be able to draw actual birds, and drawing them as humans with clothes felt too far from the original game (I tend to be quite rigid with my own headcanons and stuff, absolutely nothing wrong with giving voices clothes or making them human! In fact, sometimes I get jealous over the design expression I'm missing out on. I just tend to be quite stubborn, often to my own detriment).

Fun fact, for a while, I headcanon'd that the Long Quiet has a beak but the voices do not, and I actually used to draw them like that for a while… but I realized that I'm terrible at drawing actual bird faces with beaks. So eventually I gave in and joined the mouthless TLQ crowd (only to be technically proven wrong by P&D. Oops!)

Old TLQ sketches (January 14th, 2024)

Anyways! The very first voice designs were very small changes from a base Quiet design:

Old Hero, Broken & Stubborn drawings (January 3rd - 4th, 2024). Also, silly Everest, they didn't know they would still be obsessed with StP almost a full year later—

Hero had slightly longer head feathers and ears. Stubborn was just spikier. And Broken… well, that's when I began experimenting with making bigger changes to the original Quiet design! While still very much driven by it, I gave Broken droopy ears and plucked neck/arm feathers, something that remained consistent to this day (it's lowkey my favorite part of his design)!

Here's his current design, still as droopy as always and missing neck/arm feathers.

These three were as far as I got, however, because I quickly began running out of ideas on how to keep differentiating between voices. I don't quite remember what happened exactly (I will guess that I saw other people's voice designs and got inspired), but I started to assign real-life birds to the voices and draw design features from them.

Oh hey, owl Paranoid and cockatiel Contrarian! (January 7th, 2024)

Still very much sticking to the base Quiet design, but slowly trying to incorporate more unique features to differentiate them easier. And so it began, a rabbit hole of researching bird symbolism, behaviors, and distinguishing features, all to give each voice a bird that felt right to them. Some were easier than others (like the aforementioned cockatiel Contrarian), and others were an absolute pain (Cheated was a European robin, then a white wagtail, and then finally a house sparrow), but nonetheless, these gave me a good starting point for their designs:

Early design sketches (January 22nd, 2024)

There were… quite a few mistakes made at that stage. First, and most obvious one, is the lack of shape diversity, especially in body types, as all of my voices were basically the same generic Quiet body shape, just with a few minor height changes. It made them less dynamic and much more boring to look at, especially when I put them next to each other. Second, since these designs only drew inspiration from real-life birds, they weren't super recognizable as their own voice, if that makes sense. No iconography from the game, no other details that could help identify the voice, etc. And third… I just didn’t like about half of them. I ended up giving a small redesign to Hero, Skeptic, and Cheated as a result of the Perception Check animatic (they were all present there, so I needed designs that I didn't immediately hate). But besides that, those were the main designs I used.

A frame out of my Perception Check animatic (February 27th - March 1st, 2024). Official throwback post for it coming very soon!

After that point, I didn't do much Slay the Princess art (especially not with voices), until I rejoined the fandom right around Pristine Cut release. And let me tell you, I looked at my voice designs after a long break and wanted to cry /hj

I was NOT happy with my little guys, but I still stuck with the designs I had (or close to them) for a little while longer because I just couldn't quite figure out what I wanted to do with them, especially after such a long break. I tried to figure out what to do with them as I was doing requests and random voice interaction sketches. For some, it actually worked well (Cold, for example, got about half of his redesign as a result), but others (like Cheated, Stubborn, and Hunted) did not get any attention from me.

Random assortment of voice sketches (November 14th - 16th, 2024)

My main issue at this point was trying to figure out how much detail I wanted to add to the voices and which detail I wanted to add, too. Because my voices struggled on a fundamental shape design level, I tried to compensate by adding distinguishing details (like the weird feathers on Paranoid's chest)... but that only made these designs annoying to draw. The final tipping point was this StP Monopoly post that I spent too many hours on, battling against my own designs. I got fed up with being unhappy with them. And so, it began.

I still very much wanted to use my old designs as a base because even though I wasn't happy with them, there was a certain charm to them that I would've hated to get rid of completely (I'm a very sentimental person when it comes to stuff like that). And so with that, armed with about 18 million references, including but not limited to game screenshots, real-life birds, and other people's voice designs, I began working on the silhouettes:

Actually, the first step was to figure out how tall my voices were. I used this website to help me visualize it, and I'm now realizing that they're quite tall. Except Opportunist, sorry not sorry Opportunist.

Voice silhouettes (November 24th - 26th, 2024). I will still cry over how much trouble Smitten gave me. His silhouette had about 5 different revisions, before I finally arrived at something I liked.

Why silhouettes? Well, it's a large cast of characters, and I wanted them all to be distinct, so shape language and sizes and clarity of silhouette were the most important at this stage. I already had a pretty good idea of what kind of design elements I wanted to add, so the goal was to make sure these elements had a good base, if that makes sense. Though, I couldn't resist sketching some of those details at that stage, just to see if it matched what I imagined.

I wish I had some clever reasoning for why the voices are specific size/shape/etc, but for many of them, it was based entirely on vibes and personal preferences. The only ones that had some sort of thematic reasoning for their silhouettes were Cold (I wanted him to be very tall and extremely thin, to kind of mimic a skeleton) and Cheated (the goal was to make him as sharp and spikey as possible since the Razor is his Chapter II princess). The rest? Purely aesthetics/preference/vibes. I wanted Smitten to be large and round. I wanted Paranoid to be very fluffy. I wanted Opportunist to be the shortest voice in my entire lineup (sorry not sorry Opportunist [2]). That's pretty much it lol

Anyways! Once the silhouettes were all done, it was a matter of translating all of my random notes, and ideas, and old design elements into the final lineup.

There were three key considerations when I was creating all of my voice designs, and I tried to keep them all in mind as I was drawing these:

Simplicity - I knew I would be drawing these guys over and over again, so I wanted to make sure my designs as easily recreatable as possible.

Recognizability - how easy is it to identify the voice correctly (i.e. differentiating between, say, Hunted and Paranoid or Cheated and Stubborn by looks alone)

Random nonsense - how many small details, parallels, silly references, and "this looks cool"s can I put into design while keeping 1 and 2 true.

…because nothing brings me more joy than sneaking the dumbest references and jokes into my designs. Cold's little chest feathers are a great example of that, and I will definitely talk about it one day.

Some of my favorite design elements are different little parallels these designs have to each other (especially Stranger pairs) and to their respective Chapter II princesses:

Stubborn & Broken have a bright red accent in their design, practically the only similarity in their design, indicating that they don't have much in common, except for the passion they show in their respective routes. Stubborn also got horns from the Adversary and the general rough/tattered leg feathers. Broken couldn't borrow elements from the Tower directly, but he got feathers resembling a wimple/neck piece that nuns usually wear, and his bright red chest feathers also work as a stab wound.

Skeptic & Smitten also don't have a lot in common, but they both have a shoulder shawl, working almost as a layer of separation between them and the world they inhabit, as both can be very stuck in their ways / unwilling to see past their point of view. Skeptic got a shackle similar to the Prisoner's, while Smitten's arm feathers are supposed to resemble the Damsel's frilly sleeves!

Opportunist & Hunted are both most animal-like, with Opportunist resembling a cat (for the Witch) or rat (because that's who he is), while Hunted looks like a hare. I also tried to keep their designs most organic in terms of flow, but I'm not sure I succeeded with that. Opportunist was a fun (and difficult) one to try to mirror the Witch, I ended up giving him spiky feathers resembling the Witch's tattered skirt and sticks/debris pointing out of his feathers! Hunted was much simpler and just got the same bandages the Beast has :] That is also how trans Hunted was born if you were curious.

Cheated & Contrarian are, quite simply, both falling apart to various degrees. Cheated's stitches were designed first, along with his very sharp/spiky design, to go along with the Razor. Then Contrarian followed suit, gaining his cracks to mirror both Cheated and Stranger. I've talked enough about this already lol

And then there were Cold and Paranoid. Oh, the problem children. They used to share whispy ghost-like leg feathers (which you can see in the silhouette designs), but I hated how they looked on Paranoid, so I changed it to fit with his fluffy owl aesthetic better. Works better as a whole for his design, but now these two have almost nothing in common, outside of the darker, textured/feathered sleeves (which is not enough of a distinguishing feature). But in it's own way, it makes sense for my voice designs to end up like this, as I personally have very complicated and mixed feelings on the relationship between Cold and Paranoid. But I do like the overall ghostly skeleton-like look I gave Cold to mirror the Spectre (a large X on his chest also helps to identify him), and gloves on my Paranoid to go along with Nightmare's is probably one of my favorite design elements of them all.

Oh, and of course, Hero. Hero was somehow the easiest and the hardest to design. The easiest, because I wanted him to share a lot of features with the Long Quiet (since he is our first voice and all), so a lot of the decision-making was already done for me. The hardest, because that meant I only had very limited features that I could exaggerate or add to distinguish him from my Quiet in the first place. And so I went with the "exaggerate the hell out of existing features" route, turning Hero's face/head feathers into more of a crown/visor shape… and also giving him long hair. Why did I give my Hero long hair? To be honest, this one started on a complete whim, I tried it out when I was making a silhouette for Hero, and I kind of fell in love with how it looked. It ended up working out because it kind of looks like a lion's mane, symbolizing courage, strength, and justice. But I assure you, it's not how it started lol

Did I succeed with my designs? Well, not quite - some designs are more difficult to draw than others (looking at you, Stubborn), and others lack distinctive details that identify them as that voice (looking at you, Paranoid). But I am quite happy with them as a whole. It was a great exercise in character design for me, and I love my silly birds dearly, so I'm just glad to have designs I don't hate drawing <3

Though, I am now very tempted to do an alternative version that does have them wear clothes. Just for the fun of it. Maybe I'll do it. Maybe I won't. If I do, my Contrarian is going to rock a very pretty dress.

Anyways! If you got this far into this post, thank you so much for reading it!! I just really wanted to ramble about my voices, how much they've changed, and, honestly, how proud I am of how far they've come from their original concepts. My lads are certainly not as intricately designed as some of the other folks I see around here (stares at Sonja and Polite), but I like them, I like drawing them, and that's what matters to me <3

Thanks again for reading my endless ramble, hope you have a great day!

[fieldworm]

Melody Carver 🌊🎼

Been rereading the Lisi Harrison Monster High books. There's tons to criticize obviously but it was also sort of nostalgic and there's some fun tidbits here and there.

ANYWAYS. I decided to redesign Melody. She was such a girl-next-door/not-like-other-girls self insert sort of character. I get why they added her--to sort of serve as a placeholder for the reader--but she feels super shallow and lame from a writing standpoint, so I wanted to take a crack at redesigning her and making her feel more organic.

Cont.. (design notes/process and character rambles)

In the books most of the characters look more or less human, which is a big contrast to their designs in the show/movie/doll canon. So I gave her some actual noticable monster features with the fish details. I got inspo for her legs and arms being a different color from the Madison Fear doll. (I thought it was neat looking plus she's also the only canonical siren character design we have to my knowledge.)

I also decided to give her a sort of Tumblr hipster aesthetic bc her original hoodie and sweatpants look just didn't really fit into Monster High much. I thought the 2010's hipster inspired look felt fitting as a reference to her being a Mary Sue character originally bc it reminded me of all those old outfit inspo posts you'd see circulate fandoms.

She's Greek and her birth mother is from Greece in my redesign (I don't know if she is officially Greek in the books but she's a siren so I felt like it made sense). I gave her a tanned look bc of the Greek ancestry.

She also still got the nose job from her adopted dad in my redesign. (Not that you can't tell from how I draw faces lol). It wasn't for cosmetic reasons but rather as a way to hide her monster ancestry.

She is also homeschooled now. Her family pulled her from her classes and moved from California to New Salem after kids discovered she was a siren.

As far as personality, I wanted to pay homage to the original charicterization of her by making her have major main character syndrome. Like, she is convinced she's this mega dork who nobody could ever like and that everything revolves around her.

Her and Jackson dated for like.. two months. Sometime after Frankie dumped him, before he was fully over her. I have a gag in mind where when Melody confesses about her transformation to him and she's like "Don't look at me.... I'm a freak.... How could you EVER understand what this is like." And Jackson (literally in her shoes but 10 times worse) is like "uhh.."

Like "how could a guy who's as perfect as you ever understand what it's like to suddenly turn blue for no reason.... I'm a monster......"

And he is just standing there scratching his head.

Anyways that's all for now.... VERY long rambly post sorry guys I have so much lore in my brain. Endless supply of lore. Will I write a fanfic. Maybe .. if you guys would want to read let me know :)

[all-hail-albert]

INTRO POST. I think

I LOVE ALBERT (SPENCER) ARETZ - as you could probably tell

He was my fuckting childhood man. I envy him. He is extremely deeply nostalgic to me. Like. Extremely. You don't understand. I might cry writing this. He changed me for the better or for the worse - but he changed me. I can relate to some things he's mentioned about his life (such as being bullied in school or wasting your life playing Roblox or stuff like that). I don't want to treat him like a fictional character though, he's a real person and I kind of feel insecure about obsessing over him/his channel but hey. At least I don't write x reader smut fanfiction about him.

He is so fhcming hilarious to me. And he always was. I don't watch him as much as I USED to (my whole entire recommended page and my whole entire free time was completely FILLED with his videos for like. Two years straight. Like there was nothing going on in my brain lol.) One time i laughed so hard at one of his videos I almost, quite literally in a literal sense, CHOKED. And then I had to deal with a cold (I scarcely ever get sick).

Thinking about his content and now nostalgic it is and watching his moreso older videos make me cry /gen. Idk why.

I don't know for how long I've watched him. I wasn't there for albertstuff but I was there while his hair was still dyed. idk if that means much. probably not. idk and idc.

My main account is @cringelordofchaos. I'm so sorry to anyone who knows me from there

Intro post OVER I'm so done with this

[vargaslovinghours]

EleVeN!11!!1! (1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 10½)

Fuzzy Edgar forever. I don’t remember the context now, maybe there wasn’t any to begin with haha, he’s just so cute with slightly longer hair! And upset :)

Some Diaryfic snuggles ♥ Scriabin can be so sweet to him at the worst time ah, I love Edgar’s hard on his arm and Scriabin’s pulling his hair out of his injured eye 💕

While I was very inspired by the Red Flags meme going around (we’ll get there), I was just as inspired by Mixed Messages - this exchange is so silly and them to me. He’s just trying to flirt back, you don’t have to make it harder! That’s just what Scriabin does haha

🥐 🖕 D:’

What else did you expect Scriabin to do with texting capabilities?? I’m still very enamoured with the thought of Scriabin using emojis and Edgar using emoticons - they are sort of different generations!

Here’s the Red Flags! So gd catchy, damn lol. I was specifically inspired by the X is on a date with themself edits, it was so tempting to consider a Ladyverse version as well haha. Edgar’s uncomfortable smiles were so incredibly fun hehe ♪

Y’see because with that many eyes- you get it

Edgar’s little “Or do I??” makes me laugh haha, anything to get out of this situation!

Waiter Jake ❤️💕💖💞💗 Rescue him!

Very inspired by this one specifically, he’s totally innocent! Not offputting at all! ♥

Alright well good luck with that bye. I love Edgar being menaced into continuing this date hehe ♫

Scriabin just keeping on the pressure for this date to keep going! Slight neg in “Couldn’t you have dressed up a little nicer though? ✨” pft

Brief aside with Scriabin!Edgar out drinking with my OC Mint who has very openly had a crush on the Vargases for a while now, thanks Mint

Honestly it was all just an excuse to turn him down and have Scriabin call Edgar his “landlord” haha; I was feeling nostalgic and went back to reread some old YuGiOh fics and had been so long away that I forgot that was a term used in the fandom to refer to the bodies of people the various Yamis would take over hehe ♪ It felt very fitting!

I can call him that but don’t you call him that >:(

Angy Scriabin!Edgar, the usual

Handplates re/reading doodles!! Hghgh!!! The theses of these stories of codependent relationships cut me to my very core I’ll have you know 💕 I managed to avoid falling down the rabbit hole of Handplates!Vargas but I was this close, lemme tell you. The subtle shift in phrasing changes so much ;; I love them dearly

A kind-of leftover WOY style Scriabin, since I made his hair all pointy in my first doodles - the WOY style is quite soft and round! He looks very silly hehe

Another song that is, yes, unironically in my Vargas playlist. This is a Nny song to me and you can pry it from my cold dead correct hands. That beautiful facial hair ♪

More Handplates/Vargas, this time obviously inspired by my holiday request 💕💖💞 I honestly rather like how calm Gaster seems whenever he’s in Edgar’s vicinity, he is a fairly unassuming human haha. Is it because he doesn’t laugh very often? Oh no that’s sad actually haha

I’m not done with Blank Slate Ch. 4 just yet - hopefully soon! - but this lineup stands out to me especially since I made it while rereading Handplates. Specifically after Gaster is pulled out of the Void - Gaster having to face the people he loves who have no memory of him really spoke to me in a Blank Slate way - the scenario of being able to completely start over and have never done anything to hurt your loved ones, at the expense of never having done anything to them, as far as they’re concerned, ah! It hurts so beautifully!! That’s one of the central themes I’m chasing so it was so cool to see in that context! Very inspiring ♥

So remember how in my Sims post, one Vargas family ended up with two Todds? Well what if that but actually

Twin Todd AU, just try and stop me

The saddest little twins y’ever did see ahh 💔 Having to share Shmee because there’s just the one of him! Who has a greater need :’0

I actually went and skimmed the SQUEE! comics to get a better grasp on the Casils, I’d forgotten basically everything haha. It seemed in keeping that if they could barely keep track of the one Todd, they wouldn’t bother even differentiating between two :’) Taking Todd shifts to better share the load

At least they have each other! More helpful than a stuffed bear who eats trauma? On par at least?

I also happened to catch this screenshot of the Todds gossiping about their shadow-dad, though I’m not sure who had seen him :0 By now I have found an adoption memory-loss prevention mod - thank goodness :D - but it wasn’t installed at the time! :0 Blue Todd is the Todd who’d already been the Vargases’ kid, Red Todd is newly-adopted Todd :)

Greetings in order! One of the Todds came by to scout out this strange new person

It’s a name to go by, if nothing else

Reporting back from the field, he has served his big narrative influence hehe ♥

Uh, yeah, about that- While I don’t doubt you were seeing double at times, uhm-

Surprise! Double the sons!

Only so much space in this apartment! They’re probably used to sharing a space to sleep weh, the implications of this AU are sad! I have no one to blame but myself haha

I have never been able to give up this twisted love I have for Edgar getting flustered about incredibly silly things and Scriabin chiding him with just his name haha ♥ Real twins do not delegitimize whatever the hell you two are to each other 💕

Who me? An affinity for how names shape identity and what it means to be a whole separate person? In love with this story in particular? You must be mistaken. But really, what would their name(s) be? I also love the subtle differences even just here - one Todd speaks up for the other! Dynamics ✨

1994, 2004, basically the same year innit. Scriabin is so much more on the up-and-up about the latest technology than Edgar, that old man

In which the offscreen is me lol, I was so blown away by how much more advanced the Sims 2 was from the Sims 1 ♥ Scriabin doesn’t need a box with a program in it, he has the absolute funnest toy in the world already!

And isn’t that the most important part ♪

Scriabin immediately makes himself and hooks up with every Sim he can, Edgar uncomfortable and totally not watching a~ny of the animations hehe ♪ Honestly though, the thought of Scriabin being genuinely excited to virtually get it on with any-and-every delights me haha

Look. Look, okay, look- If I could choose what to be inspired by, I would but sometimes

Obviously Scriabin would be a long Furby lol, this exchange can be summarized to “Scriabin no D:” “Scriabin yes >:D”

He’s complaining that Edgar ignoring him sleeping is boring haha

I did briefly lose my mind over how the Furbish word for “I/me/my/mine” is all the same - linguistically it makes sense, self-possessive, but in this, in their context ♥

Based on that one Wojak format - looks into the camera like “Yes. I am in your head. Insanity tracks” pfft

And it’s @jaspravex with the steel chair!! I hadn’t drawn any of them in like a month and then all of a sudden- I was 1000% not expecting to be hit with such a huge wave of inspiration but gosh and dang did this line of thought light me up. The implication! The jealousy! Wow that’s a lot all at once I wasn’t expecting ♥ Somehow these two never ended up on my shipping chart, dynamics I swear haha ✨

There’s September through February for the fourth go ‘round! Wild when I put it like that :0 Like clockwork, these lads ♪

[sykestarot]

who's watching your social media?

1-2-3 (left to right)

I DO NOT OWN THESE IMAGES

Hi guys sorry for the break last week it was my birthday lol! But this week I felt called to do a who's watching your socials post. Maybe it can give you some insight right before valentines day! Thanks so much for the support and for stopping by :)

Pile 1

“cause when you’re fifteen and someone tells you they love you you’re gonna believe them” (knight of cups; 8 of wands (rx); 3 of cups; 6 of wands; 2 of swords; the world)) Hi pile 1 I hope you guys are doing well!! So for you guys I see for who’s watching your social media is someone either you knew when you were younger or you are young right now. You could either be with them or broken up but I see this being your first love. I’m leaning more towards you guys who aren't talking or havent started talking yet because there is a sense of longing and a lack of communication between you two. This energy is very sweet. This person still carries at the very least a nostalgic love for you and wonders what could have been. For others you guys haven’t even started dating yet but there’s a mutual attraction and curiosity about one another. This pile is filled with youthful energy!! I would also say that the energy that Enchanted by Taylor Swift carries is the same energy you carry about each other. But I do see hesitance in communicating feelings and stolen glances from one another across a room. Maybe you guys have mutual friends and are around each other but never alone? I feel for this pile that this person is a masculine and also quite youthful. I don't feel an age gap so you guys are probably the same grade/age. I wouldn’t be surprised if you don’t feel like this person notices you and like it’s one sided but I promise they notice you for sure! I see that advice for you guys in this situation is to let the universe bring the blessings to you. Don’t try too hard! What’s meant for you will always find you and trusting the divine is the best and quickest way to receive your blessings. This reading was so sweet and cute. I hope everything works out Pile 1!  Signs: first love; highschool ; beat up car; friday night lights; screen doors; fireflies; innocence; brown hair; green eyes; levi jeans; converse; crisp morning air; dmv?; childhood friends

Pile 2

"can you hear the silence?" (8 of swords (rx); 6 of cups (rx); 5 of swords (rx); 2 of wands; 9 of wands; The Hierophant (rx)) Hi pile 2! I hope you guys are doing well, I’m going to preface this with I don’t think you want to speak to this person. So they’ve taken up stalking your social media. I feel like this person could make you feel uncomfortable or unsafe. This could also be someone who you’ve recently cut off or stopped talking to. I see them being obsessed with your life. I’m not getting a specific masculine or feminine energy, but I do feel that this person has lots of envy when it comes to you. Maybe you got a job they wanted or achieved something that they couldn’t. I feel like this person could’ve been someone you considered part of your close circle. I also feel like you didn’t really give them an explanation as to why you stopped talking to them. You just kind of distanced yourself, either for your own safety or for your own peace. This could have also been a person you dated for a short time. If that’s the case I feel like you didn’t date for that long. This person might have worn glasses, I feel like black frames in specific and this person could also be a blonde. I do feel like you had felt some form of betrayal from this person though. I feel like they’re looking at your social media a lot because they want to know what you're up to in terms of who you’re with. Whether it’s a new person you're dating or new friend you’re hanging out with. However I just feel you minding your business so they’re obsession with who you’re with is a little eerie ngl. I do hope you guys are safe and know whether or not to take action against this person because for some I feel this could be a very serious and heavy energy. However for those where it is not so serious I see you genuinely not caring about this person which is so funny because they’re literally so stressed about what you’re up to and who you’re with. Anyways pile 2 I hope you guys are safe and sound and continue to do well for yourselves! Signs: crows; open fields; halloween; fall; october; wheat fields; dilapidated houses?; long distance; orange sunsets; midwestern; muddy boots; cigarettes; tattoos; brick walls?; night life

Pile 3

"I'd like to get know you, I'd like to take you out" (5 of swords; 2 of wands (rx); 9 of wands (rx); The Hierophant; 3 of pentacles (rx); 7 of wands (rx)) Hi pile 3! For you guys I see that there’s someone who watches your social media who wants to ask you out but they’re too shy. I also think that they might think you’re in a relationship? (are you?) But I see them having taken interest in you for a long time. I also feel like they have known you for a while. Maybe you guys are close friends and they think that telling you how they feel might ruin your friendship? I feel like though when someone flirts with you they get jealous and wonder if you would be receptive to them the way you are others. It also reminds me of not allowed by TV girl. I feel like they long to be close to you so much but just can’t find the guts to tell you and maybe even the words. I feel like you don’t event realize the effect you have on this person! I’d say that this person really loves you as a person and so to think about losing you completely would be so upsetting to them. I also see that you probably have had feelings for them as well at some point within this friendship. I think that you two might blame life matters for not getting with each other but if one of you doesn’t confess sooner or later I see that you could miss out on a beautiful relationship. I do feel like there is also the possibility of being childhood or family friends here. This person might have dark curly hair that they like to keep at their shoulders. I feel like they also like to wear flannels or they are cold easily. There’s an innocence to how this person feels but I also think the idea of other people touching you in that way also really makes them upset. Out of all the piles this one is the most fueled with jealousy so I wouldn’t be surprised if everyone else feels like they could cut the tension between you two with a knife. Maybe you truly don’t realize or you play oblivious but I promise this person harbors some real feelings for you! Signs: film photos; ballet shoes; tutus; ballet buns; hailey baldwin; clean girl aesthetic; 80’s; pretty in pink; molly ringwald; muscle cars; europe; 555

[fountainpenguin]

Riddle watches New Wish - Post #10

Some speculation and feelings now that I've slept after a binge up to "Trial or Hair-or" and took a break, before I start anything else.

I'm not sure when I can next watch episodes, so please don't reply with spoilers.

Background Characters

I was really worried about Whispers Fred. I only read a small glimpse of the story bible / concept art page a year+ ago- I was pretty sure I remembered Winn and Whispers Fred, though I would not have been able to recite their names.

After recognizing them, I was expecting them to be glued to Hazel's hip. I thought I'd find Whispers Fred and his ASMR shtick really annoying, but he's actually totally fine and doesn't bother me at all.

I'm relieved, because "Writers trying to be cool and they think kids want ASMR, and also I'm pretty sure a kid trying to look this stuff up could easily go down an online route they probably shouldn't be going down at their age" has been my mental vision for the direction this show is going for the past, like, 15 months and I thought I'd have issues with him.

I really like him now because you can tell Hazel's classmates all have their own depth and running gags, which is a great improvement on most of Timmy's classmates.

I can definitely look back and name the shticks for Chester, A.J., Trixie, Chloe, Kevin, Elmer, Sanjay, and Francis. We knew them- You could write a 'fic with them in it and no one would question the lack of other characters, because that's a great cast.

-> But yeah, we didn't really know much about personalities or what they do, and many of those characters I listed faded away in later seasons. I like how we're starting off strong. It makes it feel very planned. We know Whispers Fred has a podcast, even. Impressive.

Throwing this out here because it's still hilarious, but there are at least two kids in Timmy's class who are confirmed godkids - He sees them at Cupid's party - but they were both mysteriously absent when Doombringer came in as a sub to start fairy hunting and it cracks me up.

And that was all the depth we got to them, because it was never played up (and let's be real, they were thrown into Cupid's party from the character stockpile folder).

I like how Hazel is befriending people in her class. Some of them aren't fully fleshed out yet, but they don't need to be. We're getting enough that if I wanted to write a 'fic, I could way more easily play with the personalities of Hazel's classmates than Timmy's, and I love that.

[cnt'd below cut - Very long post, including things I wouldn't truly call negativity, but my vibe is discussing the things I like and the things that aren't working for me personally.

This post leans into things that aren't working since previous posts have been about what is working. Heads up for discussions of child abuse and nostalgic comparisons to the OG show. Proceed at own discretion

Reminder, I'm only up to "Trial or Hair-or" at time of posting this]

Would I Be Watching This If It Wasn't Claiming to be FOP?

The show is very enjoyable; let's start with that. I like Hazel. I like Cosmo and Wanda. I like the set-ups and the kids.

I like watching the show, but... It doesn't feel like FOP, in the sense that I'm not seeing the things that draw me to the original show (Like... the child abuse? Or Crocker? Or the risk of losing your fairies? Or Timmy's struggle to keep his secrets from Vicky, his parents, and his friends?)

Hazel's made a vague mention that she has to keep fairies a secret, but we have no proof Cosmo and Wanda would leave her. No memory wipes either.

Maybe it's just me, but FOP without child abuse is... a WILD concept to me. lol. Dev seems to have issues and I suspect he's being set up for a future plot that delves into them, but it's still funny that our main character is, like... chillin'. No self-hatred? No dissociative issues or anxiety attacks? No sneaking around? Are you sure you're in the right show?

Okay, I guess Dev is bullying her, but he's not been nearly as bad as Francis, who caused physical harm. Heck, Tootie caused Timmy more stress than Dev's causing Hazel. Trixie literally treated Timmy worse than Dev is treating Hazel- she was launching him across the room when he spoke to her.

I'm liking the show, and I see potential in this world where I could set a 'fic... but what would that 'fic even be about? This place is fluffy; Hazel's not struggling much and there's not a lot of meat here for me to dig into.

I'm not seeing stakes, and I'm kinda "hm" about it.

And I'm kinda worried I'm watching a watered-down show that's been made more palpable to an audience looking for found family fluff. Which is fine! ... It's just that I'm here for Fairly OddParents vibes. Where's my child abuse?

I'm nostalgic. I miss my boy who kept a scrapbook with pictures of him in therapy. I miss the jokes that the court once got involved and appointed the family a child psychologist. I miss how he broke down in front of Trixie, wailing that he'll always love her no matter what his therapist says. He had a lot going on that we never saw onscreen, only the implications, and I love him <3

This was the boy who literally froze time for 50 years and told no one; he was messed up and they were not afraid to paint him that way.

I'm the target audience for "people who like seeing tiny details from the OG show brought back," but I'm not the target audience for fluff or sweet and innocent characters, so if that's what we get, I don't think I'll get giddy about it.

And I'll be 100% okay with that because I enjoy watching the show anyway even if it's different, and I'm just super grateful we've got something nice for the series after so many years of a difficult slide.

I write my 'fics and I've made worldbuilding posts for 8 and a half years, but I rarely main-tag anything, and I have unique blog tags for each character so they're harder for people to stumble on, because I was trying to lie low and avoid fandom negativity I kept seeing when I ventured into the tags. So... as much as I'm nostalgic and as much as I have my fingers crossed for the things I want to see, I'm super grateful this show is very enjoyable and seems to be bringing a wave of positivity and new viewers into the fandom.

Let's be clear- I'm REALLY enjoying watching this show, but I'm waiting to see if it adds stuff that fits my interests, that's what this post is.

Threats to Cosmo and Wanda's safety?

I want to start by saying I appreciate how Crocker isn't Hazel's teacher and her dad is not obsessively trying to catch her fairies. Danny's parents trying to catch ghosts worked perfectly fine in his show, but I'm glad this one is a different direction. It's nice to mix things up and not fall into a previous formula.

It's hilarious that her dad is like, seriously doing his paranormal job and it doesn't even affect Hazel, Cosmo, or Wanda yet (where I've watched up to). That's hilarious.

I'm hoping that it's going to come back, because I haven't seen a strong sense that it will. Hazel's dad has speculated there's a ghost in his house a little, but he's not investigated at all and we've not seen any tension regarding this. I hope we're setting up a big plot with confrontation, but there's not enough there yet to make me believe we are, so I hesitate to trust the pay-off is there.

Unclear how Cosmo and Wanda meet Hazel in the morning. Do they stroll over? I assume not- Her parents would think that's weird. They're not in animal form because they're neighbors, so are they poofing over? Do they wake her up like they used to wake Timmy?

Thus far, we've not seen signs that Cosmo and Wanda could be in danger. Jorgen's made an attempt to take them away, which was their fault for claiming a godkid they had no right to take tbh. I don't mind taking a break from Crocker's obsessions, but I do miss the tension he brought us. I miss the danger. I miss the angst implications- This show is pretty fluffy so far, and I can appreciate it, but that's not "FOP vibes" for me.

Jorgen implied Cosmo would get hurt when he fell off a tower, but otherwise we've not seen signs that Fairies can be hurt or killed. And I don't know if that's even a thing that carried over in this universe, so I have to treat it as 0 risk of death.

It would be 100% reasonable for Hazel's dad to shake C and W's hands and ask to interview them, which is fine - It's a new vibe than Crocker, Doombringer, and Leadly and we could probably use that - but I think I'd be disappointed if that was the payoff for emotional investment of implied danger.

C and W haven't expressed any fear in Hazel's dad since Episode 1. I really liked Episode 1 - a lot of thought went into it - but the rest of the episodes seem like they're using Episode 1 as a diving board, but not circling back to what we established there. Which is actually super frustrating right now.

You hooked me! ... So, where's the stuff you hooked me with?

We're no longer getting C and W fumbling around the human world, we're no longer getting miserable Hazel, we haven't had any awkward neighbor interactions between C and W and the parents, and we're no longer getting the threats to C and W's safety. I feel a little cheated and I hope we see more threats later.

Please give me an awkward dinner party with the neighbors. Give me one of the parents coming over to borrow sugar and C and W have to poof away from Hazel and rush back home to maintain their facade.

Give me neighbors wanting to come to a party at C and W's and they have to protect everyone from accidentally wandering into Fairy World or using dangerous Fairy equipment. Give me C and W getting put in charge of a neighborhood event they don't know anything about. Give me Hazel's parents asking if C and W can babysit and they're so paranoid that they call constantly to check in while C and W try to act like everything is normal and they're not running around doing magical things.

I feel like we've given personality to the schoolkids, which is fine... but I'd love to see personality for the neighbors. To me, living in the same building as fairies who don't know how to be human is a fantastic plot set-up, and they're doing nothing with it.

In other words, I'm glad Hazel is delved-into as a character, but I feel like we've not seen anything about what's going on with Cosmo and Wanda.

-> Hazel's in her school arc right now, but maybe we'll have a summer break arc?

Here's my thought on that. Bluey does a really good job of balancing what's going on with the kids and what's going on with the adults. Yes, the show focuses more on the kids, but it's always clear what the adults are doing, like Bandit trying to talk to his friends while Bluey complains about him taking too long, and Bandit feeling sad when his friends leave so he can take care of Bluey.

Early in the series, we see the kids playing in the park ("Shadowlands") while Chilli and her friends talk about TV shows they like in the background. There's a constant sense in that series that Bandit and Chilli have interactions with other people- Heck, we even get an episode of Bandit struggling to make a new friend (and struggling with Bingo getting in the way of that).

I'm not getting that here. C and W do have personality, but do they have friends? Or coworkers? Or stakes? I didn't see a lot of depth to their brief interaction with Jorgen, nor does Cookie seem to be someone they know in any way.

For this show to win me over, I need them to interact with their neighbors and environment in a way they're not currently doing. Right now, they're just giving Hazel magic... but I'm starting to think they could be sexy magic lamps. I don't remember struggling with these feelings in the OG show, although back then I binged like 4 seasons before making any posts.

- It is not to their favor that they can easily spend an episode in object form and just chill. We used to have Crocker trying to sniff them out even in object form, and I kind of miss that. And yeah, they're retired, but I hope we get to see more character depth and relationship involvement in the future. - In the early season, we had background conversations like Wanda trying to lure Cosmo to the doctor, Wanda explaining to Cosmo that their "special alone time" wasn't meeting her needs and she wants more snuggles, or Cosmo being a pushover when Wanda's dad came around, or Cosmo sneaking his mom into their guest room, or Wanda blatantly telling Cosmo that she still thinks Juandissimo is intriguing. I miss the up and down of that dynamic. It's nice to see them fluffy, but... they're kind of flat. I liked the mail scene and how Wanda hugged Cosmo after he rescued Hazel in Episode 1, but again... it feels like most of their characterization happened in Episode 1. I have my fingers crossed we'll get some of that in the future, like Cosmo and Wanda cheering each other on when they learn things about the human world, or Cosmo sacrificing himself to save her from the Pixie takeover, or showing that when he stands up for his family, he's extremely powerful. tl;dr - I hope we get Cosmo standing up for Wanda. I'm glad they love each other, but I'm not seeing a lot to interest me in their ship. I'm more interested in Hazel's parents, tbh. They've got stuff going on in their "breadwinner therapist vs. paranormal investigator" vibe. And they play with Hazel and hold hands in the background. They're cute, and I want more of that for C and W. - Actually, Timmy used to get called out by his classmates for being "That weird kid who talks to inanimate objects." There don't seem to be any risks for Hazel yet. - If you were to ask me what the biggest threats are to this godparent relationship, I'd say it's either Cosmo and Wanda overstepping past Jorgen and upsetting him, or Hazel's dad finding out. But I'm not sure we're going to push those plots further, which saddens me. Holding out hope, though. - That is actually hilarious I don't see Dev as a threat to her right now, since that was Remy's whole thing. Good for him? Like, he's mildly annoying her in the background, but he's not a true danger at this time. - Jasmine has implied she's sus about Hazel, but it's been brushed off twice without her investigating. I don't think we're delving into it more, which is a shame. I want Jasmine to be weirded out.

Episode 1? Absolutely not lamps- Cosmo and Wanda were involved, they had depth, and there was tension. And the other episodes are fun, but their personalities have taken a backseat.

You can tell there was a ton of thought put into how Cosmo and Wanda interact with the human world in Episode 1. That seems to have gone away now, and they're even in reboots of their old outfits instead of their human disguises, so... it's nostalgic, but I kind of wanted to see how they'd changed over time. If you're going to give them new outfits, why not use them?

If C and W were, presumably, aging while on their time travel vacation that lasted 10k years and they look the same, what on earth was Jorgen doing that makes him look so aged after just a handful of years? I'm unclear where we are in the timeline.

We've had some nice Cosmo-Wanda-Hazel moments (like the seahorse and princess game where they were playing together), but I'm thinking the "Cosmo and Wanda nitpicking at each other" problem has been solved by taking away their conversations with each other- they're really just here to talk to Hazel.

That's fine, I guess. I just want to see more of them interacting with each other. Because I miss them.

It reminds me of when I critiqued Sparky vs. Chloe, because I felt Chloe fit really well in the dynamic while Sparky was interacting with Timmy, but not really Cosmo or Wanda. Chloe was a great balance of changing the entire dynamic (so was Poof).

I feel like this will probably change in the future when we're not pushing the "Gotta show Hazel is a well-rounded character and focus on her above everyone" direction, but since I'm liveblogging, I need to cite where I am and what I'm looking forward to.

I'm not seeing enough fairy biology going on. I like what Cosmo gave us regarding stretchy skin, but... what is life like for these people? Do they have to avoid touching humans?

Do Cosmo and Wanda pay rent? Do they pay taxes? Do they know their neighbors? Do they see other kids and get nostalgic for their past godkids? (I have to assume yes, since they took in Hazel).

-> I like the implication in "A Dinosaur in Dimmsdale" that Cosmo and Wanda have been around long enough to be familiar with the special event held at that time. I'd like more of that, but also deeper. And maybe that's asking a little much since the show is for kids and of course it's focusing on the kid... Idk, maybe I'm reading into this too much.

I like how Cosmo has twice struggled to hide his crown. That's a step in the right direction, but unfortunately I can't remember if his second time was also in the first episode.

That first episode was beautiful- everything I wanted. But the others don't meet the expectations and story hooks that lured me in.

I think what I'm trying to say is that my vision of Cosmo and Wanda in New Wish relies heavily on what I got from the OG series. I don't think I've seen much in New Wish to give them enough personality to stand their own.

I'd really like to see Juandissimo or Mama Cosma shake things up. I think by this point in the OG series(?), we'd seen them split in "Dog Day Afternoon" and "Apartnership." We knew Wanda wanted to be an author, we knew Wanda had friends in town, we knew Cosmo was a mama's boy, and we knew they were goofballs who were rarely apart and would totally crash into things when they were looking at the other.

We also knew Cosmo and Wanda had issues with being mistreated ("A Wish Too Far"). They were also goofballs who struggled to pass as human ("Transparents") and joke around ("Tiny Timmy"), and they'd make their own assumptions even if they weren't what Timmy expected (Stealing an alien prince in "Spaced Out" instead of making their own monster). Cosmo even pretended he was about to explode in "Same Game" to joke with Wanda, so she didn't believe him when he was actually close to exploding.

AGAIN... I am not far into New Wish. On one hand, it's great that Hazel's not mistreating Cosmo and Wanda, so we don't need an episode like "A Wish Too Far." I think we'll be getting more depth later in the series, but I'm liveblogging my thoughts so we can see if my opinions change.

-> I don't feel like we've learned enough about Da Rules. They were a big deal in the OG series and I'm very unclear on what Hazel does or doesn't know. I'm unclear which of the Big Rules are still in play. In the OG Season 1, Cosmo and Wanda had to grant wishes when Timmy talked in his sleep. I'd like a bit more of those rules showing up here.

-> Unclear to me if Cosmo and Wanda stay in Hazel's room at night.

I just still think they're a little "sexy lamp" for me and I want this to change. As annoying as they were (affectionate), I'd love to see Mama Cosma, Big Daddy, Blonda, Schnozmo, or Juandissimo mix things up. Because Cosmo and Wanda both have drastically different reactions to each of those people.

Maybe that's what's missing for me, because I've been writing 'fics where they ARE interacting with these people, so I'm used to seeing them have to juggle other people? In which case, that's unfair for me to judge, lol.

Blonda only had 2 episodes I think, and one of them was a cameo where she wasn't interacting with Wanda. It'd be super interesting to see her return and play a role as large as Mama Cosma's or something. I miss her too.

I am REALLY looking forward to seeing more of how Antony plays into Hazel's life. It's incredibly obvious that she cares for him (even sleeping in a bunk bed and wearing his hand-me-down shirts), so that's fantastic.

tl;dr - Cosmo and Wanda are just kind of there (imo). I'm pretty sure the episodes after the first would be basically the same if Hazel had no fairies, but was a witch who could use magic on herself.

I'm not seeing anything that makes me say "Yes, this definitely needed to be a show about godparents and not just any show about kids with magic." Give me a reason why we couldn't have a show about Hazel being a witch, having spy gadgets or tech, or having a genie. I want Fairy World! I want misery!!

Fairy World and Jorgen

I'm putting my faith in the idea that we'll return to Fairy World. I can't imagine that we wouldn't, but I have to say, our first glimpse of it didn't look too magical or dramatic.

I like how the OG series sets Timmy up as believing Fairy World is glittery and magical, so Cosmo and Wanda must goof off all day. In reality, Fairy World is big on rules and discipline. I think we take Jorgen for granted as a character since he's been around for 20+ years. It's easy to forget how funny it is that we have a big, buff, military-attitude fairy bossing people around a glittery magical world. That's hilarious!

Think of how "Old Black Magic" gives us a street made of playing cards or how "Odd Squad" gives us purple grass and cars without wheels. Some of their streets float and twist around each other. Their world should look "exciting and unfathomable to the human mind." We haven't seen the Rainbow Bridge either, really.

I have no drive to revisit Fairy World after "Department of Magical Violations," which was the 2nd episode. It didn't look magical or fun. You can tell Jorgen still has his characterization (Being strict but also liking to party), but... he wasn't contrasted against the magic of fluffy Fairy World. Without the contrast, he's just a guy.

I hope we see him again and he gets another chance to show his depth, because even though I went in knowing full-well who he is, I felt like we weren't given enough. I don't even remember seeing his giant staff.

-> He debuted in short episodes in the OG series, so it's not an issue of not being double length. I just think he wasn't utilized as well in such little time.

Give me the guy who used to turn Cosmo into a monkey during drills. Give me the guy who uses a jet pack because he cut his wings off. You don't even get to see his back in his debut, so it's totally possible new viewers might think he still has wings 😔

-> That might seem like a silly thing to be disappointed in, but after the effort that went into showing us details like Hazel's house number or how Cosmo and Wanda crawl across the floor, I feel like Jorgen didn't get the same fully in-depth treatment. He should be someone we're totally hyped to see, but he's... there.

-> Even in Season 0, we were introduced to Jorgen in a way that subverted expectations: the big, scary fairy who was such a contrast with the idea of a friendly godparent was intimidating his godkid (making him wish to live)... AND he's dating the Tooth Fairy. I just haven't had expectations subverted yet in this show and it makes me kind of sad, because that's Jorgen's biggest "selling point." He's funny in contrasting environments.

Maybe he just needs the right person to bounce off, like Binky.

I will say, I think there's nothing wrong with Jorgen not playing all his goofy cards in front of a stranger. He has a job to do and he's good at his job. But I miss him. I miss the doofus who cried for weeks when the Tooth Fairy broke up with him because she didn't like how he tried to forcibly remove Timmy's buck teeth for a wedding present.

I miss the guy who cried when he lost his job, and tried so hard at the other jobs Timmy set up for him, but he was bad at them because all he knew was to set expectations so he kept spoiling movies while selling tickets... and putting people in the hospital with his muscles.

I miss the guy who found out he was standing "in the same room as his cousin," looked at Cosmo, and then went full steam ahead into "Please let it be my invisible cousin Leonard!"

I miss the guy who used to throw pixies at his dartboard or chase them out of their own building because "He's the only one allowed to cause pain to fairies." I miss the guy who put grenades and barbed wire on pizza and gave it to a child. I miss the guy who works in his nana's cafe and covers his niece's shifts at the pet store. I wonder if he still does game nights with Mama Cosma.

I miss the guy whose idea of a good house pet disguise was a rhino in a fishbowl. I miss Jorgen. I love him, and I really hope we get to see more of his funky, goofy side, because he's such a great character.

I've only seen one episode with him, so I'm probably judging too harshly. I just think he has one of the strongest characterizations that's easy to work with because he's hilarious against a glittery Fairy World backdrop, so I miss him and I don't think the DMV was the best showcase episode for him. I'm nostalgic :(

The abuse & trauma?

I really like how the OG show plays with abuse. Yes, Timmy is an abused kid. We know this. It's made very, very clear without it being too scary for a little kid. The OG show is full of things that appeal to me as a kid (slapstick humor) and as an adult (Watching what Timmy's going through and the clever ways the show plays with the abuse angle without being too scary).

- I'm not seeing why Hazel is miserable? Which is okay, because as I said in a previous post, Cosmo and Wanda came out of retirement and befriended her of their own choice (defying instruction), so they're in a gray area with the usual gameplay rules. - I'm just unable to detect if the "godparents lose their fairies when they're no longer classified as miserable" rule is still a thing in this universe. Or "Hazel will lose her fairies when she grows up or reveals them." It's okay if those rules are gone- I'd just like to know so I can adjust my perception of what the stakes are. - Hazel avoided revealing magic to Jasmine in "Fearless," but it wasn't explicitly stated if she was told the rules or if she's just trying not to scare Jasmine with magic.

I'm a little confused that the writers for this show seem to have toned down the abuse and trauma, yet upped some present-day horror. Like, I legit would not suggest a friend watch "Fearless" or "28 Puddings Later" without a warning.

- Those were some VERY scary spiders for a kids' cartoon, especially compared with the goofy spiders from the OG canon. We had onscreen trypophobia (I think? - Not sure if there were enough holes in the cheese, but there were holes) and I used to have a friend who would've struggled with that part of the episode. And I get that swiss cheese is going to have holes- I'm just a little surprised we didn't go the route of making Jasmine a relatable character for someone with trypophobia and instead she faced all her fears as if they were nothing...? Or is that relatable- I'm not sure. I mean, it's a cartoon, so... idk what I expected. I know I wouldn't love being forced into a bloody environment, and a friend violating that after I told them no would possibly be a deal-breaker (and has been, actually, since I've had ex-friends ever since I was a kid stop caring about my boundaries and try to show me blood and/or purposely try to upset me with blood when they lost interest in me as a friend). But also, Jasmine is 10 and if she wants to try facing her fears, she can. I don't have issues with that. - "28 Puddings Later" had red lighting on the bodies and faces in a way that was a little much for my hemophobia, and I think I'm not going to be watching that episode again unless I do some prep. I was trying not to look for most of it.

It's... weird? Usually the Hartman shows go fine for me, although "T.U.F.F. Puppy" has like 2 episodes that jump my hemophobia, but they were... not drawn-out like this. Those were legitimately spooky things to watch (Saying this as an adult who wasn't genuinely scared, but was analyzing the execution and comparing it to other cartoons I watch). I think that's a great thing that sets the tone of the show... but that's not the tone I really want?

It's totally fine for New Wish to be its own thing, but it's not the FOP that drew me in years ago.

- I want more psychology- and trauma-themed underlying jokes, like Cosmo panicking when Timmy's parents babysat Poof because "Those two have no idea how to raise a child!" followed by panning over to Timmy. - I want more bits like Timmy standing up to Imaginary Gary and saying "When I was 8, I learned what a real monster was like" and introducing Gary to Vicky. I want to be asking "Kid, are you okay? Hey, what was that??" and gushing over implications. -> I've seen the tiniest taste with Dev so far, but not enough to catch my interest this early on. I'm hoping that goes somewhere, but if I'm struggling to see the depth in Cosmo and Wanda, I don't have the highest hopes. Like, childhood trauma was a huge thing in the old show (I would argue it's the main theme), and every time those glimpses of Timmy's genuine struggles came up, I lost my mind. I'm not seeing that with Hazel. I like this show for the magic, sure, but I really liked this show for the underlying trauma themes that made you want to explore character backstories with a 'fic. And I'm sure there are plenty of people who want to explore Hazel's relationship with her brother with a 'fic, and Dev seems to have stuff going on, but Hazel doesn't do for me what Timmy and Chloe did. I discussed Timmy above, so let's talk about Chloe. Chloe had serious mental health struggles. She had multiple dissociative spirals. She committed fraud. She broke into Timmy's house to steal from his dad's toy collection because she was jealous. She lied to authority figures for literally no reason except to make herself look better (Not even to cover up magic- She just straight-up lied). When she was upset, she would pull all-nighters and plot revenge (And that was like, her 3rd episode). She lived in denial even when things went wrong. She also wouldn't stand up for herself sometimes, so Catman pushed her around. She also stole from Kevin Crocker while he was passed out (lol), went on power trips, bribed people (including Crocker) to like her, sold out her friends for extra credit, backstabbed Timmy by turning him into a monster who couldn't speak so he couldn't unwish the wish, and it was very clear why she needed godparents. This child mostly raised herself on Fair Bears cartoons for 50 years of the frozen timestream. She has parents who are rarely home, and when they are, they completely violate her boundaries. Timmy literally has to stand up to them for her at one point because she's spiraling into her second dissociative episode since her parents came back to Dimmsdale- she was strugglin'. Chloe's canon is that without Cosmo and Wanda, she would've led a gang (giving us one of my favorite lines in the series, "I can't believe you found 6 kids with eyepatches"). She couldn't handle watching kids for 1 day without screaming at them, calling them "monster children with evil in their hearts," and making them so miserable, all 3 kids got assigned godparents. At the end of the series, she nails Crocker's bed to the ceiling. She's... a lot. On some level, I enjoy that Hazel is not suffering abuse right now. Hazel is very likable, but I feel like the show is going for a different vibe than what I'm looking for in an FOP show. I miss the trauma undertones. That's why I like this show and why it's deeper for me than many cartoons. This is a show that's been a massive part of my life for 8.5 years, so... I miss those hooks that draw me in. I hope we get something like that for Hazel (or Dev?), but I'm not seeing anything that would draw me into this show if it weren't advertised as a continuation of a show I already really liked. It reads like a show I would put down and walk away from. Well, things did draw me in, but... I don't see them being carried through.

And going back to "Fearless" and "28 Puddings Later," I get it, about the spook factor. It IS pudding. I get the joke we're making here, with how funny it is to think of it as a zombie apocalypse. I'm totally onboard- It's not them, it's me. You just can't make my brain settle down, because it sees what it sees and I have to deal with that.

This feels like FOP without all the things I like about FOP.

I'm just... Where's the kids' show I liked to fawn over because it was fluffy and slapstick on the surface, but secretly playing with trauma underneath? I enjoy the ride New Wish is taking me on, but I think I'm only watching this show because of its FOP connection. If this were some non-reboot (just a brand new Nick show about a kid with some kind of magic), it would be kind of "meh" to me so far. I don't think new viewers or kids would be bothered at all, but I miss the OG.

New Wish kind of gives me Star vs. The Forces of Evil vibes. I enjoyed that show's first season, so I don't say that as a bad thing- I just mean "Star had her own wand and didn't need godparents." Except Star got to explore the responsibility and danger of having a wand and Hazel's not giving me that either.

I like how we've gotten callbacks to the OG series. I get excited by the references and I'm very grateful we finally have a reboot that's taking the show seriously and with love. I hope we can lay it to rest when New Wish is over so it ends with a pleasant memory for people.

I like it, but it's not one of those hidden gems I've stumbled on in the past that I've gotten hooked on (Ex: I randomly stumbled across the Carmen Sandiego 2019 reboot, All Hail King Julien, and Kick Buttowski, and every single one of those blew me out of the water as a hidden gem I fell in love with). But... I feel like I'm watching New Wish more to avoid the risk of someone spoiling it for me (and because I want to see allusions to past episodes) than because I'm truly captivated by it, which is a shame.

I love it as a reboot, but I don't think I'd watch it as some standalone show that just dropped. And that's probably fine, because it's not trying to be a standalone- it's trying to be a nostalgic reboot with a fresher take, and that's totally okay.

- But consider... Send the toddlers back to Lightning Walrus Hell while Foop begs to be spared and frantically tries to claw his way out of the vortex after Poof's been vaporized, then rewrite time so they never existed. THOSE were stakes, and THAT was the messed-up stuff I love. lol. - (Do not actually do this- new things are good and if Poof and Foop had to relieve their own childhood trauma regarding the Hocus Poconos, I would die. Also, that was the Season 8 finale and New Wish is only in its first season with chill episodes, so it would be wild to expect that much drama straight out of the gates. Also, it takes time to establish things before we can have that kind of drama. I'm willing to be patient.)

I will say, I do think we're matching some early-series vibes. We had episodes in the early days where Timmy bonded with his friends, and I really like that Hazel's taking her time to meet new friends (something we didn't get to see with him until Mark Chang's Season 2, 3, and 4 appearances). I think that's going 100% fine. I like what I like, but I'm getting increasingly anxious about the things I miss.

I do feel nostalgic for Remy. I miss Juandissimo and Mama Cosma and Vicky and Mark. Nothing wrong with not pushing them in if Cosmo and Wanda have moved past that life drama, but I still want someone or something to cause tension. Shake things up.

-> They don't have to appear personally, but I miss The Vibes.

I will say, I love that Hazel hasn't had a love plot yet. We have no clingy fans like Tootie (or that newspaper girl from "Fairly Odder"), and Hazel's not in love with someone who hates her. I won't be mad if we get a romance plot, but I hope it's something fresh (and not one person pining after the other despite being told that person's not into them, which I find uncomfortable especially in a kids' show if said show plays it as cute or "kids will be kids" without going into how frustrating it is to be the person who wants to set boundaries).

-> Please let me live vicariously through a main character who's not dealing with "Just give them a chance!! :) They really like you! They may seem creepy, but they're probably nice!" vibes.

It's also really nice that no one's immediately attracted to the new kid when she's only been here a few weeks or months. It's nice that she's building friendships. If a relationship blossoms over time, that's fine, but I'm glad no one is currently in love with her and pining for dates (as in, straight out of the gates).

-> I genuinely cannot figure out who they're setting Dev up to be, so if he's a future love interest, I hope he does some serious work on himself. He's got issues and he's mean, and Hazel also seems to think he's mean, so based on my current understanding of his character vibes, it'd be weird if she conveniently forgot how mean he is and developed a crush on him. I need to see more facets of him.

But it's very funny that he follows people and tries to make bigger and better things. That's exactly what a bratty 10-year-old Dimmadome would do. And honestly... I think I can see him developing a crush on her over time. Like... I genuinely do think that would make sense for his character based on what little I know about him right now.

I think Dev is super jealous of how Hazel just arrived and is gathering friends- which I really like, because we're seeing how it takes Hazel some time to make each new friend, and Dev has the same amount of time and opportunity, and is choosing to be a jerk.

It really showcases this idea that Hazel is making an effort to learn to be nice (and even needs to learn not to try changing people to be what her brother was to her). She's working hard on herself and she's trying to make friends. She didn't show up and have people fawn over her immediately. She's here, she's nice, and she's working to understand friendship and boundaries.

And Dev, who is used to things coming easy to him or just buying what he wants, HATES that.

I think jealousy is fueling Dev right now, but Hazel IS a nice person. I can totally envision him growing more fond of her someday and letting down walls. I can tell he's important to the writers, but I'm wary he's being set up as a future love interest and I don't currently know anything about him that would justify Hazel being attracted to him because all I've seen so far is him being grumpy and her glaring at him.

-> Also, I'm getting the feeling that Dev doesn't have a healthy understanding of relationships, family life, or boundaries, and I would be afraid for Hazel.

I think I forgot to say it, but everyone's phones had a D logo implying they're a Dimmadome product, which I like.

I feel like Dev needs some healthy relationship modeling from Cosmo and Wanda (or Hazel's parents). I'll be curious to see if we go in that direction.

Where are we in the timeline?

I love that this is a show about Hazel. I'm really enjoying this- I think I'm glad we're not getting a "children of the main cast" cliche (and we didn't get a total reboot where we redo Timmy's childhood and pretend the OG series didn't happen). This is very funny for me.

Since Dale was older than Timmy, I'm getting the vibe that we're a few years before Tommy and Tammy get their godparents. So... are they gonna show up, or is Timmy gonna be single with no kids if he ever appears, which I'm betting he will eventually. Or do I have my timeline wrong?

"Channel Chasers" future is canon in my Cloudlands AU, and this is generally the accepted future for the series. Keep in mind that's the angle I'm talking from here.

Assuming CC is canon, it's confirmed Timmy has his kids really young (20 years after he buries the time capsule at age 10, his kids dig it up and they seem to be close to his age, so somewhere between, like... 7 and 10), so Timmy would've been 20 to 23.

It's not unreasonable for Dale to have his kids at a much older age, so I will totally accept Hazel being either older or younger than Tammy and Tommy; it doesn't matter to me (although if they're retconned out of existence by having Timmy show up as a childless man combined with clearer timeframe confirmation, I'll be surprised).

I also want to be clear upfront that my canon for Timmy's future in Cloudlands AU is that he has his kids with Molly ("Wishing Well"). They later split, leaving him open to marry either Trixie or Timmy (but it's ambiguous in my 'fics so the reader can decide). That way, I get to enjoy Molly, Tommy and Tammy get to be in a rough patch when Cosmo and Wanda show up, Timmy's struggling emotionally but he's not a terrible dad long-term, and fans of Trixie or Tootie can have the endgame because I don't mind. tl;dr - Timmy has been shipped with Tootie in some other spin-off media, like the "Fairly Odd Summer" trilogy. I don't treat that trilogy as canon in my 'fics, but we know from "Channel Chasers" that it's implied Timmy has Tommy with a black-haired person or Tommy's adopted, and the latter seems unlikely since both kids look so much like him. So if New Wish has Timmy show up and heavily implies he's with either Trixie or Tootie, that's totally fine within Cloudlands AU canon. But he does flirt with Molly in my 'fics and they are so cute and making her Kevin's step-sister was one of the best ideas I've ever had because it makes family vacations fantastic, so get wrecked <3

But I feel like they're really baiting us with Timmy stuff (Showing several adults that look like Timmy, but confirming behind the scenes "That's not Timmy," putting him on posters, using him as a school mascot, etc.) It's very in-character for this universe since even in the OG series, Timmy's likeness was sometimes used by other characters, but... I'm a little nervous.

Cosmo and Wanda didn't seem to look back on their time with Timmy as fondly as I would've expected. I'm glad we're getting a fun cartoon with a new person, but I hope we're not going a "nudge, nudge, Timmy was a horrible person and fans are dumb for looking at him fondly or wanting him around" angle.

-> That kid was 10, working through childhood trauma, and struggled a lot in life. That's literally the point, and expecting him to be as well-adjusted as Hazel would be asking a lot of him- Their backstories and home lives are very, very different.

I'm getting the sense that we're making allusions to the old show (even obscure ones that surprised me, like a Flappy Bob cameo, super specific Fairy interior design details, or "Terrible Twosome" throwback). The writers have done a good job of picking out the parts they liked and using them as their canon, but I get the feeling we're not going to have references to Sparky, Chloe, Roy, or Viv.

Which is fine, because I understand they were late in the series and a lot of people didn't receive them well (Me included). I just hope they're not treated like they're dumb or something to be erased from history, y'know?

I have absolutely no issues with them not showing up. I do expect a Timmy cameo someday, but it would not bother me at all if we didn't see Chloe. But like, I don't want them written out of the canon IF we specifically look back at the canon. If for some reason we recapped every godkid Timmy had interacted with and we were mysteriously missing Chloe, I'd give you a really weird look, slkfdj.

-> If our canon is that Roy and Viv didn't happen, I'm fine with that because it's a spin-off. But Chloe was mainline canon and this show has already made clear it's grabbing canon from across the whole series (including seasons as late as 9) and not just focusing on the early seasons, so... I'll just have some questions if we write her out of existence, lol.

New personalities? Anti-Fairies?

Where I'm at in my binge, there have been no Anti-Fairies. I'm expecting them to show up because it seems likely we'd get a Friday the 13th episode. I feel like the Anti-Fairies have regularly been the most popular characters of the series in the fandom and they played a big role in later seasons, so I'm sure that writers who have done so much research that they've found details I consider obscure to the average viewer are gonna give us Anti-Fairies. I can't imagine they wouldn't.

And I'm NERVOUS, lol.

So, one thing that I've always thought is that Anti-Fairies were planned to be one-off characters. After their Season 2 debut, they don't appear until Season 5. My personal thought is that Anti-Wanda got slapped with a "cheap and easy" personality without a lot of thought behind it; compare her recolored design with Anti-Cosmo's fully detailed fleshed-out design. I'm super curious to see if she'll get rebooted to be a better parallel of Wanda.

I've played her in my 'fics as being grubby to parallel Wanda's mob upbringing. I still write her with what from the outside may seem like lower intelligence, though in my 'fics I specifically have her being raised in an Anti-Fairy zoo enclosure until her young adulthood, and grew up fluent in her people's native language. It's not that she's stupid, really... She just grew up with limited contact with the outside world, so converting her thoughts for a bustling society is a struggle. I try not to make her a statement of intelligence, though she can be self-deprecating when she compares herself to others.

Like, I can literally see this going either way. I would be totally in favor of giving Anti-Wanda a reboot, because I love her very dearly and tbh I kind of prefer her over Anti-Cosmo... but I will always support taking a second look at the "idiot Southerner with a drawl" stereotype. If she gets freshened up so she's not played as so dumb, or still dumb but less Southern, I'd be fine with that. It's... not a great trope.

Nerd alert incoming - Yes, it's mostly me rambling about how much I love the Pixies & Gary and Betty because I want my feelings written down before any chance of them showing up.

-> Once upon a time, I would not have dreamed my faves might show up, but now that we've gotten a Flappy Bob cameo, I have to prepare for anything.

Okay... so. It's Anti-Cosmo whose potential reboot personality concerns me most, and for purely selfish reasons 😂. In my personal opinion, fanon Anti-Cosmo is surprisingly different from canon Anti-Cosmo. I'm pretty sure they're going to reboot him as a sexy evil villain, because that's what the majority of people think he is. Even though he's a total dork and rebooting him as a suave, confident smooth-talker feels incorrect to me.

Riddle's unpopular opinion: The personality I've seen many people portray Anti-Cosmo with in fan content feels closer to the personality the Head Pixie has than it feels to Anti-Cosmo. If H.P. were younger with the exact same personality he has in the OG show, people would give him the "sexy bad boy" treatment they give Anti-Cosmo. They just don't because he's old </3

Yes, H.P. is ALSO a goofball. He likes cosplay, breakdancing, and he's often either at a rave or bemoaning that he's not at a rave. He only has a few episodes and his love for raves and clubbing comes up in at least 3 of them. But he's the one doing the classic "evil villain" stuff like signing contracts, pulling puppet strings, torturing people with shock collars, and finding loopholes.

H.P. sets up long-term plans. He's calculating, meticulous, and he's one of the sassiest and most confident characters in the entire series. Happy Peppy Gary and Betty literally have a direct phone line to Sanderson, presumably under H.P.'s influence since he's the boss.

Like, that is explicitly canon and it's my favorite background detail in the show. The Pixies thought ahead and gave them a phone. Gary and Betty were in on the plan and knew about magic. At bare minimum they knew they were working for people called Pixies.

Sidebar: Even in their episodes before the Musical, it's implied Gary and Betty know more about magic than the average human. They had laser-eyed unicorn mobiles that formed cages. They somehow got from Florida (implied by Gary's use of the word "gator" and confirmed by this episode's script) to California (Dimmsdale's confirmed state) before end of workday, implying they returned through non-human means. -> Also in their debut episode, they literally went to outer space with Mark, were chill about it, and offered him snacks; idk what to tell you. They're my everything. H.P. seems to have meticulously set up a lot of things and it's so funny to me. -> Also this is very non-canon in the finalized series, but in the OG script of the Musical, it's implied Gary and Betty took the Pixies hostage, and also they seem to be friends with Imaginary Gary. They're heavily implied to sing his villain song with him (where he blatantly reveals he's Imaginary Gary), and it's HILARIOUS. Can you even imagine? He was their boss in that version of the script. I can't deal. That's so funny; he's like 5. Was he even paying them or did they just think he was fun? I just need all the lovely new followers I've gained since I started posting about New Wish to understand how not normal I am about the Learnatorium crew. If you've ever wondered why I write about them so much... I just think they're neat! <3 -> Btw for anyone wondering, you can find some early-season scripts on Fred Seigbert's Scribd. It's painfully difficult to navigate, so I suggest Scribd's search bar instead of his profile. For easier reading, I keep screenshots of the things I find most interesting on my blog, tagged #original script. I figure if you've read this far, you might be into quirky FOP lore, so run... be free. I think I've read them all, so all the funny moments are on my blog. There are some lovely gems in there... There's a deleted scene from "Totally Spaced Out" where Gary and Betty tried to ditch their jobs and flee to Mexico, a deleted scene of Mark and Vicky lovingly holding hands in the nursing home while he's in squid form, and a deleted scene from "Oddlympics" of Jorgen, Anti-Cosmo, and H.P. dressing up as cowboys and in dresses. Juandissimo has early lore about his fear of Cosmo. There's a storyboard for "Anti-Poof" in there somewhere.

Anyway, the point is, I enjoy H.P. a lot. Listen, I've been a huge fan of this guy for 8 years; I love him to death. He's very sassy. He purposely messes with Jorgen's head and Jorgen loses his temper over it. He jumps through hoops to do things right, he wields loopholes to do things wrong, and he tortures people because, in his own words, "It's hilarious."

-> In my mind, HE is the manipulative schemer that Anti-Cosmo often gets remembered as. Where's my sexy bad boy H.P. fanart? Surely it was someone's job to show me that /jk

And there is nothing wrong with portraying A.C. as a sexy bad boy. They can both be sexy bad boys. I'm explaining how I read him in my incredibly specific take, but others might not read him this way. A.C. does a good job of pretending to be a sexy bad boy, but I personally enjoy when he's also portrayed as a dork and I want to talk about that because it's my post.

So, honestly... I think Anti-Cosmo is scared of Jorgen. He never challenges people directly, instead using disguises or hiding behind social events like the "Oddlympics." He lets H.P. take charge in his own castle. He can barely discipline his own son (and when he does, Foop ignores him). A.C. throws temper tantrums on the ground, kicking and shrieking and breaking stuff when things don't go his way. And I LOVE him for it.

But he's not a suave bad boy in my mind, lol. I mean, he tries, and sometimes he pulls it off, but he's definitely not sweet or charming. He's a tantrum-throwing baby who yells at his wife <3 and only holds her hand during "When Nerds Collide" if you pause in time to catch it.

You know how I said Jorgen is a twist on expectations? Anti-Cosmo's whole thing is that people think he's cool and smart, but it's a façade. In his debut episode, Timmy outsmarted him very easily. It doesn't surprise me at all that Anti-Cosmo took a step back in later seasons and Foop became our main Anti-Fairy. Because it's totally in-character for Foop to go looking for trouble, and it's totally in-character for A.C. to... not do that.

A.C. is an introvert who needs a reason to leave the house. Foop likes running around, causing trouble. It's great. You can see so much of Anti-Wanda in Foop and it's funny to me.

I like how A.C. sometimes wanders off and forgets what he's doing. I mean, that's how Timmy defeated him in "When Nerds Collide"- His friends coaxed him into meandering off on his own. He charges headfirst into things despite consequences. He throws things, including his wand. He runs away from confrontation. He jumps on tables. He makes paper airplanes. His wife mocks him for having dorky X-ray goggles he bought from the back of a comic book. He's a goofball.

Again, they are both goofballs- A.C. and H.P. Every villain is a goofball: Norm spends his time out of his lamp eating ice cream and getting his dry cleaning handled, H.P. likes to party, A.C. can't sit still, Sanderson prioritizes music above villainy, Crocker is more silly than spooky, Foop is a baby who needs naps and playtime, and Kevin ping-pongs between self-deprecation and giddy overconfidence.

Anti-Cosmo does come across as a bad boy sometimes. I'll be very surprised if we don't see Anti-Cosmo's return since he's a popular character and I think people are into his British bad boy vibe, but like...

Since it's my speculation post, I just really need to say that if they change his personality so he's now super charming and sassy with no signs of the temper, dorkiness, or cowardice that's always lurked in him, I'll be sad... because I like my tantrum-throwing baby who shakes his wife up and down when he's stressed. And this man was not the sharpest tack when it came to sass, sdfklj.

I totally suspect New Wish will reboot him as a total sexy, suave villain because honestly, that's probably the way he's remembered. Which is okay, but if he does return, I will miss my silly comics-loving geek who can't stand up to a newborn, writes notes with brightly colored pens he changes every sentence, and jumps on tables during fancy dinners. He's so goofy. I hate him (/affectionate).

-> And if we bring back Anti-Fairies, but throw the Pixies aside because "Eh, they're boring," it will be a crying shame. I will accept it, but you will find me standing with a confused look on my face as I swing my hands to gesture between Anti-Cosmo and H.P.

-> There's nothing wrong with bringing back A.C. and not H.P.! The Anti-Fairies are beloved and stick in people's memories well, I'm sure. But also, H.P. is my favorite in the whole series. He's incredibly sassy, manipulative, meticulous, and hilarious.

Where else can I find an old man who drops the line "The only thing you'll be eating is my dust!" before jumping on a scooter and blasting off with a shout of "Later, dude!" Or the old man who gets distracted because he'd rather be at a rave. Or elbows Timmy in the side with a smug smile and asks if his pizza tasted better than "Jorgen's slice of pure rabbit droppings."

This is the man who danced and sang "Go me, go me, it's my birthday." It's heavily implied the main reason he's a villain is because he's too obsessive compulsive to watch the world fall apart around him. That's hilarious. He literally took over the world and the first thing he did was go home and get drunk. He's a fantastic character and I should say it.

-> I'm not gonna be mad if we get an Anti-Cosmo reboot and kick the Pixies into the sun. I'll just be /pensive emoji about it. Also, I rambled about this mainly because I've gained a surprising amount of new followers recently, and if you're new here... I just think you deserve a warning about what you're getting into with my blog. I love him so much.

In conclusion... IF we get the Pixies and H.P.'s been reduced to a dull and boring stereotype who lost his snark and love for parties, I'll be devastated and I'd rather have them not show up :')

... Also if H.P. is dead and Sanderson is now in charge because it's "the future," my head will be in my hands. If that happens, you can unfollow me right then because it's all I'll talk about /lh. I want my super sassy bossman, please and thank you.

I would miss the old H.P., but I would also be grateful for any Pixie scraps I'm given because they're my favorites. I cannot believe we got a Flappy Bob cameo in New Wish. Definitely not on my bingo board.

Well... There we go! My thoughts so far. I'm looking forward to seeing where the show goes, and I hope we get to see more of the things I want. These are very early thoughts!

Again, please don't spoil anything since I'm only up to "Trial or Hair-or," and please no grumpiness in my replies or inbox.

These are personal liveblog opinions from a long-time fan who's been avoiding spoilers since New Wish was hinted over a year ago. My opinions may change later if the show goes a new direction. I AM enjoying the show, but I also wanted to share what I like about the OG and what I'd like to see in New Wish's future.

Thanks!

[thesweetestdevotion]

I saw a post a couple of weeks ago on how a member of enhypen (bighit boygroup) would act around their crush and hope it’s ok to request this reading from you———how would Sunghoon from enhypen act round while he’s round his crush and pursue this person that he likes

Thank you!🤎🤍🤎🤍🤎🤍

hey! so im gonna combine this ask with another ask about sunghoon as a bf! ill be channelling for both questions so dont worry!

Im also not very familiar with him so pls bear with me lol

Enhypen's Sunghoon as a Boyfriend

Dice: Scorpio, Moon, 11th House

How he would act around his crush:

Tarot: The Moon, Page of Coins Reversed, Page of Swords Reversed, Queen of Swords Reversed, Nine of Swords, Three of Cups Reversed

Ok dont come for me for this, but i get a sort of harsh vibe from him? at least if hes crushing on someone. Scorpio moon energy is one that is closed off and private (trust me i am one ;/) so i sort of get hes afraid of closeness in a sense, especially if its a crush he isnt sure is reciprocated. With The Moon card im sensing his vibe in a crush situation is a bit insecure and closed off. also with the two pages and the three of cups all reversed it makes me feel that there was some sort of situation where he was excluded or outcast from a group of friends/from a past crush, so this experience weighs heavily in his concience and heart when navigating a new crush (aww ૮(˶ㅠ︿ㅠ)ა)

another thing is i think he might try to distance himself from his crush through self sabotage. He'll try to overcompensate for his feelings by seeming harsh, distant, cold, and judgemental, when deep down he has a longing for connection and is functioning out of fear of another rejection that would hurt his feelings. Like his bandmate Jay, hes prone to heartbreak and his past hurts dont help at all. With the 11th house energy im seeing he also tries to remain as friends with his crush as he doesnt want to compromise a platonic relationship with his romantic feelings.

How he is as a boyfriend:

Dice: Sagittarius, 11th house, Sun

Tarot: Page of Coins, The Emperor, Six of Cups, Ace of Wands, The Tower Reversed, Six of Wands Reversed, Nine of Cups Reversed

Now for how he is as a boyfriend, i feel if he was in a commitment his confidence would skyrocket, esp with sagittarius sun energy, he probably feels more like himself. I think hes the type of person to need reassurance that the other person really likes them back before being able to feel comfortable and secure in his emotions. the six of cups tells me hes a very sentimental and nostalgic person. now idk why im hearing this but i keep seeing scrapbooks? and crafts? like those handmade couple gift ideas that you can diy yourself, so idk if hes artsy or if hes just interested in receiving something like that. Also when i started this second part of the reading he came off a bit sassy hehe, so maybe when he gets comfortable with people he could show a little fiery side to himself. Lol also i got he'd be the type to like having little unserious arguments or debates, he really likes banter im getting. The tower, six of wands, and nine of cups all reversed tell me that he has the potential to heal from his past through his future connections, but also that there is a sense of anxiety in him still just below the surface that makes him feel as if the worst is going to happen at any moment. He has the tendency to overthink, even in a secure nice relatioship, so he might ruminate in his anxieties alot. Idk if hes generally the anxious type but it seems relevant here.

hope i was able to capture him well! he was fun to read for! Thanks for the two who requested him, i hope you dont mind i felt called to combine the two asks into one! xxx

[perhaps-in-anotherdream]

[CN] Victor’s Nostalgic Memories Date (Eng Translation)

“You’re my first.”

“You’re my first, too.”

⌚Warning⌚ This post contains detailed spoilers for a date, 旧忆之约, that is yet to be released on the global server! ♡

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

─  

【Subbed Video】    

[Heads-up]: Read the transcript for reading, but  PLEASE DO WATCH THE VIDEO!! THE BGMS, THE VOICE ACTING, EVERYTHING!! (also, yes, I’ve made my real-time reactions 🤪)

───────

【Transcript Version】

【Chapter 1】

Not long ago, Victor received a commemorative book.

The sender is his alma mater, Loveland Central Elementary School, which is about to celebrate its 100th anniversary.

The book is filled with old photos of his school. With unending excitement, I relentlessly search for that familiar figure among them.

Little Victor holding up his award certificates with a composed demeanor, hoisting the national flag with aplomb, or standing on the winner’s podium during the sports meet… all these are images of him I haven’t seen before.

MC: Model student, flag-raiser, long-distance running gold medalist… how many more surprises does this man have in store that I still don’t know about?

?? (Victor): What are you muttering to yourself this time?

I look up and find that Victor has entered the bedroom without me noticing.

MC: I can’t help but feel sentimental~ After all, you were that “kid from someone else’s family” when we were little.

–

[Tidbits]: The term MC uses here is “别人家的小孩,” I guess you’ll understand this better if you are an Asian/ of Asian descendance/ have Asian parents LOL; it’s often used to describe how parents spur their own kids into working harder by often mentioning “the other kid” as a role model who usually excels in many aspects~ :> And MC playfully follows this with– he belongs to her/ they’re a family now. So, she can take pride that “the prized boy” is all hers 🤣💕 (aside from the obvious knife about MC being regretful of missing out on each other’s lives, which comes later~ 🥲)

–

Victor: Someone else’s family?

Watching his cool and collected expression as he arches an eyebrow, I cheekily walk up to him.

MC: Hehe, but now you’re mine~

As I notice him smiling slightly, I can’t help but be insatiable and pull him along to join me in flipping through the photo album.

We have just flipped through a few photos of the “Campus Singing Competition” when the person beside me seems to have seen something, causing his pupils to quiver ever so slightly.

Following his gaze, I catch a glimpse of a young kid with dramatic stage makeup, sporting a red dot on the space between his brows.

Before I can take a closer look, the commemorative book in front of me is abruptly snapped shut.

MC: Wait!

Hastily, I clutch his hand down and carefully inspect the photo. There is actually a small caption below it that reads–– “Little Victor, photographed by Dad”

Astounded, I snatch the book and examine it closely–– the child’s solemn expression, with furrowed brows, is unmistakably identical to that of a certain someone I know so well.

I stare at Victor in utter disbelief, while he seems to have already resigned himself and closed his eyes.

MC: Hahahaha–– you’re so cute, hahaha!

Victor: …stop laughing, give me back the book.

MC: Alright, but you have to agree to one condition of mine.

Victor: ...you sure know how to make demands.

MC: Don’t want to agree? Well, then I might just turn you into an emoji pack, huh?

Victor takes a deep breath as if he has reached the limit of his patience. He then takes out his phone, quickly taps on the screen, and holds it to his ear.

Victor: I had planned to bring a certain someone along to visit the school when I’d sign the contract to donate to the school building.

Victor: But since the photos seem enough to satisfy you, I think I’m gonna talk to the school about reducing your title to a colleague.

Hearing his words, I immediately grab his arm, displaying a sincere expression.

MC: Why didn’t you tell me about the building donation before? I’m not laughing anymore, I promise!

He arches an eyebrow and moves his phone a few inches away, as if waiting for me to offer a bigger bargaining chip.

I narrow my eyes and steel myself.

MC: I’ll give you three of my embarrassing childhood photos!

Victor: Deal.

Hearing a muffled chuckle in my ears, I suddenly realize what’s going on. I seize his phone and, sure enough, find that the screen is still locked.

MC: …you’re so childish, Victor!

Despite my reproach, he remains composed and raps my head.

Victor: He who touches ink becomes black, you know?

—

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

—

【Chapter 2】

Victor: …wish strips?

An old metal box is gently placed on the table, inside of which is stacked with many pieces of weathered papers, tinged with a yellow hue.

After the completion of the donation contract signing, only three people remain in the empty conference room— the two of us and the principal.

Principal: When I learned that you were coming back, I inquired with your homeroom teacher about anything that might have been left behind from back then, and she really found it.

Even as I try hard to focus my attention on their conversation, an inevitably innate urge drives me to reach out and flip through the wish strips with my fingers, looking for a certain one.

Soon, a weathered piece of paper catches my eyes, with meticulously and neatly penned six letters that form the name “Victor.”

However, before I can reach my hand for it, a large hand with slender fingers lands on top of the paper––

Forced by the seriousness of the atmosphere we are in now, I can do nothing but watch helplessly as Victor nonchalantly slips the note into his pocket.

Victor: If there’s anything else you need help with in the future, please feel free to contact me again.

Principal: Thank you, Little Vic. Despite your remarkable achievements in the outside world, you still haven’t forgotten your alma mater.

–

[Tidbits]: I’m freaking crying, haha–– look at his Principal still calling this grown-ass man “小李 (Xiao Li)” aksdknld– the sheer adoration you can’t let go of despite the admiration a person has achieved from you– 🥺 

–

Victor: You’re too kind. On a different note, I wish to take my girlfriend on a tour of the school later. I wonder if it would be convenient?

Principal: Absolutely! You two are welcome to wander around and have a good time.

–

It’s summer vacation, and the campus is absolutely empty.

The continuous symphony of cicadas seems to transport me through countless summers, carrying me to the past that belongs to him.

Hand in hand, we walk beneath the shade of the sycamore tree, retracing the journey captured in old photos, from the faintly plastic-scented crimson athletic track to the library, and eventually arriving at his former classroom.

–

MC: Where would you sit back then?

Seeing him pointing to a seat in the back row, I press against the window frame and peer inside, yearning to glimpse that small figure across the boundaries of time and space.

MC: Do you have any special memory from your elementary school days?

Victor: What do you mean by special?

MC: Copying homework? Not paying attention in class? Or maybe… puppy love?

It seems like he’s heard something that displeased him; a slight frown creeps onto his face, and he gives me a subtle, scrutinizing look.

Victor: [strikes immediately LMFAO]  Your elementary school life was this eventful and colorful? It seems like I underestimated you a little.

MC: Of course not; I didn’t do anything of the sort! I’m just simply curious about your school life~

Victor: It was like any regular elementary school student’s life–– attending classes, doing homework after school, and occasionally playing soccer. Nothing out of the ordinary–– 

Suddenly, the sound of a series of brisk footsteps interrupts his words. Before long, two kids carrying backpacks appear at the far end of our sight.

Little Boy: Did you check? If you forget to bring your homework again, I won’t come with you next time.

Little Girl: I’ve really brought it this time! Where should we go to do our homework today?

Little Boy: The library.

Little Girl: But we need to stay quiet in the library, and I won’t be able to talk with you there.

Little Boy: …let’s go to the burger joint then.

Watching their departing figures from behind, I tug at the corner of Victor’s clothes.

MC: Have you ever done homework together with other kids?

Victor: Might have done some group assignments at some point.

MC: With you sitting next to them, their study efficiency must have gotten a massive boost. I’m really envious of those classmates who had the chance to do homework with you…

Hearing me say this, Victor’s face takes on a curious and contemplative expression.

Victor: Don’t be envious. I’ve got an idea.

MC: What do you have in mind?

Victor: It just so happens that I have to work tonight. You can bring in your unfinished proposal, and we can “do homework” together.

MC: …I’ll pass. Even a dummy can tell the difference between a friendly invitation and being supervised by a capitalist.

As we are talking, I see the kids from earlier run out of the convenience store in front of the school gate.

With delight on their faces, they share a pack of crisp instant noodles. The savory and crispy aroma from afar feels as if it reaches the tip of my teeth as well.

Just like me, Victor turns his head toward the source of the noise. Upon seeing his reaction, I immediately reach out and take his hand.

MC: Wanna go to the convenience store? It’s my treat!

—

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

—

【Chapter 3】

The store is not big, but it boasts a diverse selection of snacks arranged on the shelves.

However, my eyes are drawn to a seemingly ordinary pack of candy tucked away in the corner. Memories of my elementary school days rush back, when this candy was all the rage for playing pranks, and I also couldn’t resist tasting it once myself––

Even at this very moment, the fast secretion of saliva in my mouth is a vivid reminder of its “special” flavor.

Filled with curiosity, I pick up the candy and shake it at Victor.

MC: This candy used to be so popular back in the day. Have you ever tried it?

Victor: Nope, I haven’t.

MC: Your childhood is missing just a little something, then.

Victor: If being a glutton is your yardstick, you probably had the most complete childhood in the whole world.

Listening to his playful banter, I silently make up my mind to tease him a little. I grab the candy and settle the bill.

Just imagining the look on his face when he tastes the sourness makes me involuntarily curl my lips into a smile. However, realizing that his gaze is fixed on my face, I hasten to temper my smile.

MC: Victor, may I fill in the missing pieces of your childhood?

Victor: No need.

Ignoring his attempt to decline with a shake of his head, I affectionately bring a candy close to his lips.

MC: Come on, give me some face! I never asked any boy students out for snacks back when I was in school. You’re my first.

Upon hearing my words, his motions pause momentarily, and he stares at me fixedly with downcast eyes.

Just when I think he’s going to reject me again, he softly lets his lips part, lowers his head, and eats the candy from my hand.

I instantly widen my eyes, not wanting to miss any nuance of his expression. But all I see him is chewing the candy nonchalantly without any changes in his demeanor.

This isn’t right… could they have changed the recipe? Puzzled, I pop a candy into my mouth, but as soon as it touches my tongue, I grimace from the sourness.

MC: Sss! So sour!

Victor seems to can’t hold back and bursts into laughter.

Victor: Mmm, it’s indeed sour.

MC: You did that on purpose!

As my indignant glare meets his eyes, he arches an eyebrow in response.

Victor: You sure have a talent for turning the tables. But speaking of doing it on purpose—

Victor: Back when I was in school, I never teased or played with any girl students, either. You’re my first, too.

The candy in my mouth still gives rise to an unending stream of sourness, yet I can distinctly taste a sweet flavor.

Victor: So happy that you’re in a silly daze?

Upon hearing his teasing, I  realize I’ve been rooted to the spot and giggling like a silly person this whole time. I quickly pretend to be composed and divert the topic.

MC: I was thinking that we visited all the locations where each of the old photos was taken, except for one that slipped through the cracks!

MC: Where was that adorable picture of you with the red dot between your brows taken?

Victor: Why do you always apply your surplus obsession in places where it’s not necessary?

MC: Humph, it took me so much effort to get you to bring me here. Even if I have to dig the school three feet deep today, I’ll definitely find it!

Seeing me steadfastly staring at him, he lets out a sigh and helplessly takes my hand.

Victor: My alma mater had to spend so much effort to reach the lifespan of a hundred years. I’m not letting it be dug up by you.

—

We’re obviously supposed to be searching for the location of the photo. However, Victor brings me back to his old family home, which is currently empty.

Before I can even ask anything, my gaze is captivated by a rather extravagant box of jewelry on the foyer table.

As I let out a small gasp of surprise, Victor also glances over, and his expression turns somewhat speechless.

Victor: Aunt Grace purchased these during her trip abroad. She said you might get tired of seeing me in formal attire, so I should occasionally change things up…

MC: Pfftt! Why didn’t she just send them to you directly?

Victor: Because I declined. She probably planned to take a roundabout approach and ask my dad for help.

MC: Well, that works out perfectly. There’s no need to bother Uncle.

I “obligingly” pat my chest as an expression of “taking responsibility” and put the ornaments in my bag.

MC: But you didn’t especially bring me here just to pick this up, right?

Victor shoots me a wordless glance and then points toward the flower house ahead.

–

Victor: Not just the head is slow, the eyes are slow too.

MC: Hey, you meanie…

After a few seconds, I’m suddenly taken aback, my eyes widening. I pull out the photo from the commemorative book and compare it to the flower house before my eyes. To my surprise, it turns out to be exactly the same.

MC: This photo was actually taken at home?

Victor: After I came back from the performance, the teacher notified us that we needed to take a photo.

MC: But I thought you would remove your makeup right after the performance!

Victor: You’re right. I did wipe it off as soon as I got off the stage. But my dad deliberately used a red seal ink paste to reapply that dot.

Seeing the awkward look on his face, I can’t resist the urge to tease him and fish out the lipstick from my bag.

MC: How is it fair if you just make do with a red seal ink paste? Since the other kids have it on, you should too.

Victor: …I should not have told you.

He firmly grasps my unruly hand, but I use my left hand to snatch the lipstick and persistently keep inching closer to him. At this point, I’m practically draped onto his body.

Just as the lipstick is about to touch his forehead, he suddenly looks behind me.

Victor: Dad, you’re back.

I jump off him in a panic, and with my eyes closed, I immediately bow towards the entrance.

MC: Hello, Uncle!

After waiting for quite a considerable amount of time without any response, I’m beginning to feel slightly puzzled when I hear a soft chuckle from above me.

Victor: Turns out that there are still ways to restrain a certain someone’s out-of-control unruliness.

I raise my head and see that there is no one at the entrance.

Seeing the smirk of triumph in his eyes, I let out a “humph” and decide to turn the tables against him. At this moment, I coincidentally spot the wish strip peeking out from his pocket because of our earlier playful fooling around.

But he’s guessed my intentions, and almost simultaneously, he presses his fingertips on the slip of paper along with me. This results in a brief standoff as neither of us releases our hold.

The silent confrontation lasts for a few seconds until I pout, and that’s when I hear him let out a resigned sigh of compromise. I finally have my wish fulfilled and get my hands on his wish strip.

The paper has already yellowed and become brittle, but the carefully and neatly written words haven’t faded even a bit during the overlong passage of time––

“I want to grow up fast so that I can find her.”

Caught off guard by intruding into the “secret” of his past, I somehow feel a mixture of indescribable emotions flooding my heart.

How come he never mentioned to me that he had such a wish before? I can’t help but lift my eyes to look into his.

And he stares at me for a long, long time, as if he too wants to glean something from my expression. His lips twitch, but he doesn’t utter a single word even after a long time passes by.

Seeing him hesitate like this, I decide to be the one to break the silence first.

MC: Haha, I didn’t expect your wish to be so sincere and honest.

MC: But don’t worry, who didn’t have some little secrets in their childhood? I’ll just pretend I didn’t see it!

Victor: Little secret?

He doesn’t seem to have expected me to say this, causing him to evidently be stunned for a moment. But soon, a glint of playfulness sparks in his eyes.

Victor: Well, that’s a shame. I was originally going to share it with you, but since a certain dummy isn’t curious––

Victor: I guess I’ll just have to leave it be.

—

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

—

【Chapter 4】

He has really done what he said, not uttering a single word of explanation.

He even seems to be in high spirits as he grabs a bottle of whiskey from the liquor cabinet, as if he does not feel my indignant glare fixed on him at all.

Victor: Let’s celebrate together.

MC: Celebrate what?

Victor: I’m really lucky; my wish has come true.

With a hint of tenderness crested between his eyebrows and in his eyes, he uncorks the wine bottle. “Pop”–– the celebration begins, but I feel as if it’s my heart that has begun to deflate.

I push down the bitter feelings in my heart and take a sip of my drink.

MC: Congratulations to you, then.

Victor: Why does this “congratulations” sound a bit like you’re saying it against your will?

Being relentlessly pressed by his step-by-step advances while he is greatly amused, I suddenly feel a mix of embarrassment and anger soaring into my chest.

MC: How should I congratulate you then? Do you want me to take a photo of you for comparison to prove that you’ve grown up properly, just as you wished?

Victor: Sure, how do you plan to take the photo for me?

Originally, it was just an impulsive remark I made out of anger. But his reply suddenly causes me to choke, rendering me momentarily speechless. I can’t help but feel a little itch in my teeth.

However, upon glancing at the extravagant jewelry box in my bag, I narrow my eyes.

The next second, I push him onto the couch and start “hanging” all the jewelry on him without even asking him.

Victor: …are you decorating a Christmas tree?

MC: Since we are taking new photos in the once familiar place, you naturally have to dress up enough like an adult to give them the true value of commemoration.

However, I gradually realize that the ornaments on him don’t look over the top at all; instead, they make him look even more exquisite.

Seeing this, I wickedly pull open a section of his collar, exposing a large expanse of sculpted muscles that charges into my eyes. I can’t help but gulp at the sight.

Victor: Is this how a certain dummy defines an adult?

MC: Why? Can’t I do this?

Hearing his soft chuckle, I huff in anger as I mutter under my breath.

The next second, my wrist is clasped in place, and I find myself falling into his arms. That familiar scent of his hems me tightly.

Victor: Of course you can. But I think there’s still a bit of room for enhancement.

His warm breath grazes my ear now and then, making my heartbeat accelerate involuntarily.

Realizing that my chance to counterattack is slipping through the cracks, I inwardly compose myself and tilt my head slightly, forcefully suppressing my racing heartbeat.

Aiming my gaze at the lipstick on the table, I immediately come up with a plan.

MC: You’re absolutely right; there’s still room for enhancement. It was my bad. I still need to mark you like an adult––

I grab the lipstick and apply several thick coats on my lips, then seal it with a big kiss on his cheek.

The corners of his lips twitch slightly, seemingly evident that he didn’t anticipate my move at all. After a brief moment, he just casually leans back against the couch.

Victor: Have you finished all your preparations for taking the photo?

Looking at his face painted with the mark of my kiss, I nod in satisfaction.

He raises an eyebrow at my reaction, then pulls me closer to him once again.

Victor: Now it’s my turn.

Victor: Photos that hold the true value of commemoration should be taken alongside the witness testimony who made my wish come true.

MC: Witness testimony? Me?

Victor: Is there a third person here?

Victor rubs his temples helplessly, but the smile hanging at the edge of his lips seems to validate the daring conjecture harbored in the depths of my heart.

MC: The “her” you wrote about in your wish strip… it’s me?

Victor: You dummy, who else could it possibly be except you?

Without a moment’s hesitation, he admits it candidly.

In this instant, my heart feels as if it has been drenched.

The mottled wish strip in front of me is akin to the tip of an iceberg I have somehow peered into. It reminds me that in places I’ve never seen, millions of emotions lie buried that I still don’t know about and have yet to fathom.

And those deep eyes of his, which have been fixed on me all along, are so honest and sincere without the slightest concealment, make me surer than ever that––

The impact of our childhood encounter, the bond that forged our destinies together, perhaps runs much deeper than I had ever imagined it to be possible.

It turns out that I have already had my place in his past long ago.

By the time I speak again, my tone has already become joyful.

MC: Ah–– it turns out I had already become your heart’s desire so, so early on. I must have had quite the charm back when I was little, huh~

Victor: …I really underestimated how thick-skinned you can be.

He laughs involuntarily and watches me quietly for a while. The light in his gaze becomes even deeper and more earnest.

Victor: But MC, when I say “I’m lucky,” it’s not because I found the little girl from my past.

Victor: It’s because of the fortunate circumstance–– that little girl turned out to be you.

I instinctively find myself rooted to the spot, feeling a tingling itch sprouting in my heart, as if a wobbly little flower has blossomed within me.

It’s not until he takes hold of my hand that I finally snap out of it. Accompanied by the silky smooth touch of his fingertips, an English word takes form on the glass wall of the flower room –– Morii.

MC: What does it mean?

He lowers his gaze to look at me, his eyes seemingly concealing a subtle smile.

Victor: Originally, for me, those past days were nothing but ordinary moments, days that I would never want to look back on.

Victor: But the moment you stepped inside and looked around, those old times suddenly came to life again.

Victor: Perhaps it’s the gift of a certain dummy; you’ve always made me want to keep holding onto these moments that exist because of you.

His gentle voice is reminiscent of a feather landing in my heart, creating concentric ripples of waves.

I find myself unable to contain my giggle and lean in closer to him.

MC: Then let’s keep holding onto it.

He is slightly stumped for a moment but soon understands the meaning of my words and turns on the camera, aiming it at us. From beginning to end, those eyes of his gazing at me have held a perpetual interplay of tender and fervent glimmers.

Lifting myself up on my toes, I approach the figure that is also drawing closer to me.

Two throbbing hearts appear to have traversed the confines of endless dusty time, seeking solace in each other’s arms time and time again.

Right at this moment, the flash of the camera lights up.

────────

[Tidbits]: Didn’t wanna break the immersion, so kept it for the last here. The word Victor led MC to write together, i.e., “Morii” means the “desire to capture a fleeting moment that cannot be retained.” It’s basically the ephemeral nature of life, the reminder of everything inevitable. It’s like a time in which you expect the least, a time in which that moment spontaneously confronts you, but there is nothing you can do to preserve it— and the desire to do all you can to keep that moment to yourself is “Morii.” And if you know Victor and Victor x MC’s story, I’m sure you understand why it’s so important that they wrote it together, or rather MC instinctively followed his strokes without asking why— (இ﹏இ`｡)❤️

—

─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────

[Anika’s Long Analysis & Ramblings]

───