#this is a long one folks lmao
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soon it'll be dawn again
transcript under the cut ⏬
page 01
Fig: no way? - you're still up?
Riz: Wh– yes?
Riz: Why'd I not be.
page 02
Fig: I me~~ean - that took.
Fig: whole day.
Riz: Yeah?
Fig: 'm beat.
Riz: you should sleep.
page 03
Fig: nah. my guy's still up
Fig: I wanna hang out.
page 04
Riz: That's really nice.
Fig: Hah! - Nobody ever expects an Archdevil rockstar to be nice.
Riz: … yeah. - 's just budget work tho. (the stuff I'm working on) - I've heard it's boring.
page 05
Fig: yeah, but you do it…
Riz: It keeps things going, right? - Nothing happens if nobody sits down and - does the thing.
Fig: That's right… - though. Yeah.
page 06
Fig: sometimes it's someone else who - doesn't want the same thing to happen.
Riz: … - mm.
page 07
Riz (off screen): …It took me a long time to get that not everyone likes doing what I do. - 's probably because you guys are so nice– - or. - kind.
Riz (off screen): to anyone too, not just. - the people you /love/.
page 08
Riz: that's not how it is elsewhere. - The world's– not. hostile. - but 's not like it's kind.
Riz: So I'm doing as much as I can now…
page 09
Fig: Hey.
Riz: ?
Fig: Go dig some dirt with me.
page 10
Riz: [blank speech bubble] - oh you meant like - actual dirt. (not incriminating information)
Fig: o yea.
Fig: there's clay in the backyard soil. - sometimes when I'm sun deficient or something I go touch dirt for a bit.
page 11
Fig: here u go
page 12
Riz: uh
Fig: now we make a thing! - 'm pretty good at freehanding a bowl.
Fig: I'll show u
page 13
Fig: just– yep, flatten that out as evenly as u can, then–! - actually ur nails'd be so good at cutting out the strip. [larger than usual space] wait. - wait. wait u can carve patterns with them! we HAVE to try
Riz: uh - What. do I carve?
Fig: anything!!!
page 14
Fig: and– yep just seal the inside uh. seam?
Fig: yep that works - okay time's up! all contestant hands up
Riz: [blank speech bubble] - okay - wh. what's next?
Fig: haha - watch this.
(sound effect text): FWOO—MP
page 15
Riz: WH– DON'T JUST DO THAT???
Fig: Now it's fired!
Riz: THAT WAS NOT SAFE
Fig: (actually it's just dry. if u add water rn it'll dissolve)
Fig: ok catch!
Riz: [blank speech bubble] - careful!!
Fig: dw no need haha
page 16
Riz (thought bubble): oh - it's warm…
Fig: now I want you to throw this.
page 17
Fig: u gotta do it - c'mon
page 18
Riz: wh– - It's like 3AM right now
Fig: oh it's not /fired/ fired it's not gonna make a loud noise
Riz: And then just? leave a pile out here?
Fig: pour water over it & it'll be gone I told u
Riz: but
page 19
Fig (off screen): RIz.
page 20
Fig: I've done all this before.
Fig: Can you trust that at least?
page 21
Riz: no, I– - I do. - I trust you.
page 23
Riz: okay what happens now
(sound effect text): glob
page 24
Fig: we do it again!
page 25
Riz: wh. [larger than usual space] What do you mean. (this clay's too wet also)
Fig: see! you're already learning
Fig: [blank speech bubble] - there are flows that are futile to fight. - The world changes.
Fig: Things change.
page 26
Fig: I've learned my lessons with "forevers". - But - as an artist
Fig: I can give you one thing: - You can always do it again.
page 27
Fig: most of everything depends on the rest of the world, - but this. - making new. - that's yours as long as you want it.
page 28
Fig: So?
page 29
Riz: Yeah. - Yeah! - let's make another one.
#dimension 20#fantasy high junior year#fhjy#riz gukgak#figueroth faeth#technically no spoilers in this comic but listen. I Will be gloating in tags. I will Never Shut Up#for the record!! this was fully conceptualized and sketched Before the finales. I started sketching this after the boat fight#and when murph closed riz's arc this season with ''maybe it's okay to change and welcome new things'' I pogged irl#I am simply the best at reading comprehension what can I say! (<- grown ass man with roughly the same perspective on teenhood as the player#fucked up that this became so long (almost 30 squares lol) that it took me this long to finish#lmao I say all that but. genuinely I am delirious and my feelings abt riz's arc this season are so big... I was getting psychic backlash#for a While lol. it was scary!!#had to sit down and do therapy on my own ass for a bit. the teenage apocalyticisation is real. that word isnt tho Im pretty sure#truly anything you do at that age feels like that's it that's all you've got going on forever. and its not true! its simply not true#you'll be okay my guy. you love your friends so so much but also there will be more to love out there#this one goes out to fellow aroaces and also folks leaving somewhere theyve called home for a long time#nothing lasts forever but that means new things come by too! ur ability to make new is infinite!!#there's no magnum opus people leave but new people come by too etc. I am too sleepy to remember what I wanted to say uhhh#well. thank u for looking at my art. I think thats the one pack it n ship it boys
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Meowdy Saint 😼
I got goth vibes and so does my AngelOC, Elodie. So it's funny to imagine this pink boy who is secretly an emo boy in disguise next to a wednesday addams esque babe lmao. Poor boy miscalculated, I like that there was an option to be like 'Oh I like that goth style' at the cafe.
But this raises a question! Would he drop the Ren persona and aesthetic if he realized it wasn't totally necessary?
⌞♥⌝ This has been answered multiple times in the past, but yes, he'd drop the light academia aesthetic if Angel wasn't into it! ^^
However, from a game dev standpoint, it'd be extremely difficult for me to include a bunch of types and aesthetics in hopes of making Ren's appearance feel more inclusive for everyone, so it's easier for me to say, "Oh, Angel likes this one anime character" and build the lore around that.
So, for those who like Ren's real appearance and would've preferred if he introduced himself as [REDACTED] (instead of his Haruko persona), I hear you!! ^^
But please understand that if that were the case, the 14DWY storyline would be a lot less interesting and would defeat the entire purpose of Ren's motives. A big part of his characterisation is that he's more than willing to alter every part of himself to become Angel's ideal type, and if their type happened to be [REDACTED], then it'd make the buildup to his reveal in Day ??? feel far less anticlimactic.
#💌 — answered.#💖 — 14 days with queue.#💖 — about ren.#kazefiend#Drawing Ren with multiple hairstyles is already A Lot™️ for me#so you can only imagine what will happen once [REDACTED] comes into da picture lmao#I don't think this is something players think about; but I have to draw both Ren AND [REDACTED] variations of CGs to compensate for—#—each choice the player makes. E.g: choosing long haired Ren but [REDACTED]'s fit; short haired Ren with his normal fit; normal hair with—#—[REDACTED]'s personality but Ren's normal fit; etc.#There's a lot goin on behind the scenes so I (unfortunately) can't add variations in outfit/personality styles#Sorry for ranting!! I get this question (and other very similar ones) a lot; but folks tend to skip over the pinned post T_T
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oh here's something funny I don't think I said yet it's been *almost* a year since my breast reduction surgery, and after all that time: my Left Nipple has randomly come back online.
#i couldn't feel it before. and now i can.#she made the connection. folks.... the movies are back.#the human body is so wild... one of them was alive day-of the operation and lefty is coming back online#almost a year after my operation#so there's a long-term reduction update for you LMAO#sergle.txt#this is probably good news for those of you who have been- for some reason- Invested In My Recovery#everything is up and running!
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small PSA: if you shop at craft shows or artist alleys, please bring more than apple pay or a virtual card - especially if you're not comfortable entering your card number manually. not all of us have fancy card readers, so please also bring your physical card or cash, even if it's only as backup 👍
#psa#conventions#artist alley#not art#i've done two craft shows and two conventions with just my swipe reader. and cash ofc. but i did have to miss a couple sales at the cons#because people only had apple pay. no cash no physical card. It Sucks For Both Of Us!#when i say there are small businesses in the artist alley i mean some of us are Small#i don't speak just for myself but for other artists who have this trouble as well. some folks are just starting out and some folks#just do this for a hobby and can't afford or can't justify the bigger terminals yet or at all#if i get into ACEN again next year i'll opt for a terminal but they're Pricey and not something to start out with y'know#if you want to be an artist's best friend though? pay in cash.#not to mention if there's technical or wifi trouble - cash just works 100% of the time. no reader or wifi will stop you from using cash.#semi related but i had someone try to pay with apple pay at my last show and i said they'd have to enter their number manually then#and they said they'd go find their partner and see if they had card/cash. and then while they were walking away from their booth#their friend asked why and they said it wasn't safe. on one hand i can't be mad because its VERY good to practice card safety!#on the other hand. you're entering it into the same app that would process a swipe payment. it's exactly as safe as if you'd swiped it#i promise as long as you're entering the number into a square app your card info is safe lmao#anyway yeah a lot of us aren't Big Businesses. please just be courteous and bring some traditional payment methods Just In Case
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Another eye
Can also be found on AO3
You can’t see anything.
Blood drips from your face. You think it hurts, in that distant way everything does now. You try to get it out of your eye, just enough to see the fight, but your vision stays dark through the wet sounds of blood and flesh.
Stupid, you think to yourself. Stupid stupid idiot, zoning out in a battle. Should have just looped forward to the king instead of taking that bathroom break and fighting the floor boss. Couldn’t even blinding cry, so what did it matter?
Your family members are speaking. They don’t do that much in battle. You should probably listen.
Bonnie is crying.
Mirabelle heals you again, a light feeling drifting over you that does nothing to take away the weight in your stomach. You don’t know why she did it again, you just need to get this blood out of your eye and you can go back to the fight, stop zoning out just enough to beat the sadness blocking your way to asking the king the question you’ve been dreading.
Isabeau is saying something very close to you. You think it’s him, at least, from the deeper tone. You can’t hear it. Can’t fight can’t see can’t hear. You’re pathetic.
He touches your face.
It’s- new, strange, unexpected. You flinch, and he takes his hand back, like your family always does because you’re so weak you can’t even handle being touched. But the hand only leaves for a moment before it’s back again, holding your cheek. you stand very, very still.
Is the fight over? It has to be. You almost had it before you got distracted and let yourself get hit. Maybe Isabeau and Odile got it while Mirabelle was healing you. He wouldn’t be touching you like this if the sadness was still attacking, back turned to where it stood.
He wipes the blood away from your eye, unstained hand doing a much better job than yours had. You still can’t see. You still can’t hear what any of them are saying. He sounds close to tears, though.
Ah. You know why you can’t see.
It clears your hearing. Fear, for some reason, leaves when you exhale. You breathe deep in, again, and a full sense of calmness fills the space of the fear you breathe out.
The blood hadn’t covered your eye, it was coming out of it. Stupid Siffrin didn’t pay attention to the fight and lost another eye.
Isabeau is cursing, voice wet with tears. His other hand cups your jaw, keeping your head in place. He wipes more blood away, touching your eyeball with so much gentleness you feel it should heal it. Mirabelle crafts another healing spell, and Odile asks Bonnie for the one sweet tonic you picked up this loop.
You pick up your wooden arms, raising them slowly, like through a thick fog, to land your hands on Isabeau’s. He drops his hands from your face. You’re speaking to your whole party when you say, “It won’t work.”
Bonnie sobs. Someone, likely Odile, pours a tonic on your eye anyway.
You just need to get to a frozen tear. You don’t remember where they are, but maybe you could convince your family to lead you to one. If you could find some excuse. Or just swing your arms around until you hit one.
“The head housemaiden could heal you,” Mirabelle whispers, voice just as teary as Isabeau’s. “I should have taken more healing classes. Studied more on my own. I can’t do it. And by the time we get to her...”
She trails of. Crafts another healing cure. It works just as well as the others.
Healing of this scale needs to be done quick. You know, because you all talked about it when you lost your first eye, and when Isabeau showed you a small scar on his bicep. Go more than an hour or two without the right healing craft, and it’ll be permanent.
An idea lights up in your mind. You turn your head, but it all stays black, and you can’t look anyone in the eye.
“We can find a tear. Freeze me.” It’s so perfect. You almost have to stop yourself from grinning. The best excuse you could have ever asked for. “when you beat the king and everyone unfreezes, someone can help me.”
The lie is easy, as easy as all the others you’ve filled these two days with. They won’t beat the king without you. You won’t unfreeze with everyone else, and the head housemaiden will never help you. But you need to see to fight, and you need to loop to see, and you need a tear to loop.
It’s quiet for a moment. “Will that work?” Odile asks, voice strangely soft.
“It’s worth a try.”
“We’ll find a tear!” Bonnie yells. They either stamp their foot or jump in place. “We’ll defeat the king and you’ll get your eye back!” their voice is still wet. You don’t know why. Are they scared of fighting the king without you? Now you’re thinking about the loop you let them go alone. Stars, you really are an awful person. Of course they’re scared when you can’t keep fighting, and just before the king, too.
“Let’s bandage it until then.” Mirabelle says, and a piece of cloth presses against your face. It’s nice and cool. “Your coat is all dark know.”
Odile, you think, listening to the footsteps, start walking. “We can’t go back,” she says, “hopefully there will be some tears further in.”
You walk after her. The corridor is as familiar to you as the rest of this blinding house. You don’t need an eye to know the way.
Isabeau still hovers beside you, steps heavy but careful. He doesn’t offer to guide you, probably afraid to touch you, but you can imagine his arm reaching out, hovering above your shoulder, ready to steer you away from the walls or the floor or what else you might kill yourself on. Fragile little Siffrin, can’t walk on his own.
Bonnie is to your other side, rushing ahead for two steps at a time before falling back again, never straying far. They hiccup, and audibly sniff their snot in. You feel awful. The tear is close. You just need to loop.
Mirabelle walks in front of you with Odile. You can almost feel her continuously looking back at you, footsteps irregular in that familiar pattern. You don’t know why it’s familiar, and when you try to remember, it slips away like lightless sand between your fingers.
The air is tense. You slip into your mind, a little. Claude is up ahead, frozen in time with the secret ingredient. You turn a corner, and don’t think about how strange it looks to your family for you to walk through the corridor like this. Isabeau calling you graceful is there, memory pushing itself to the front of your mind, but you don’t force yourself to act as if you don’t know this place better than yourself. They won’t remember.
“Does it hurt?” Bonnie whispers besides you. You instinctively look towards them, but still see nothing but darkness around you. “Sorry, stupid question. Of course it hurts.” Their voice is still wet. They sniffle. “You just act like it doesn’t.”
You’ve been acting a lot. Almost everything feels like a secret, a lie, a play. This isn’t one of them. “It’s just an eye.”
It’s the wrong thing to say.
“WHAT DO YOU MEAN JUST AN EYE?!” Bonnie yells, and their voice is still wet, but it cracks in fury. “You always do this, you don’t care about anything! It’s your eye, you can’t see, you lost both of them now! You have to care!”
They hate you. You remember, now, that they don’t love you. You couldn’t get yourself to help them this loop, too tired from hearing the same thing again and again and again. In this moment, Bonnie hasn’t hugged you. In this moment, you haven’t talked with Bonnie about losing your first eye. In this moment, they still hate you.
But it’s fine. You’re on your way to a tear. You’ve all been walking this stretch for a while, Mirabelle should see Claude soon, and then they’ll find the safe room, and after that - you think you’ve seen tears there before.
“It’s just an eye,” you say again, because you can’t bring yourself to pretend any differently, that it matters to you more than having to loop and run through the third floor again. “I’ve lost worse.”
Bonnie doesn’t respond. Claude has to be here soon, right? Was she always this deep in the corridor?
"How is your eyes not the worst thing you've lost?" Mirabelle asks, so quiet you almost don’t hear her. The kind of question she doesn’t expect a response to.
You shouldn’t respond. You don’t want to respond. How can you. You can’t speak it’s name, can’t tell them anything about it, and you already didn’t help Odile this loop because you couldn’t bring yourself to follow the blinding script again when she won’t understand and won’t remember and won’t care.
“I lost my home,” you say anyway, because it’s all one big cosmic joke. They won’t remember anyway. It doesn’t matter. “And I don’t even remember it.”
Does your country matter, if no one remembers it?
Isabeau speaks up, always the emotionally mature one. “I’m sorry, that sounds awful.”
“You never remember anything,” Bonnie sniffles, sounding tired. The kind of exhausted you get calming down from crying. You wish your stupid eye would let you cry.
You’ve already broken the dam. It doesn’t matter, it doesn’t matter, it doesn’t matter. “I don’t.” Isabeau tugs at you cloak, pulling you slightly towards him. He lets you go, a meter more to the left of the corridor than before, and doesn’t explain anything. You don’t ask.
“Not even the word for a stuffed animal. Or a sharpening stone, which you use all the time. Or bananas.” It seems to calm Bonnie down, listing all the things you don’t remember. You follow along.
“Not the name for all the birds in Dormount. What bonding earring are. What we did last week. My family. My country. Your names, that one time.”
It doesn’t calm you down. Or the others, for that matter. Isabeau stopped walking. The other three follow suit.
You stop too, because the others did. Then you wish you had kept going, because now you’re just standing here, and you still can’t see anything.
“Sif...” Isabeau starts, soft and careful. “I’m sorry. We’ve been poking fun at your memory, but this... We need to talk, after we beat the king.”
You don’t want to talk. Have you already made the pun on your memory this loop? Bonnie said you couldn’t remember the name, so probably, you need something else, something to divert the attention, it doesn’t matter because they’ll forget but right now they remember and you don’t want to talk.
“Aren’t there any tears here?” You ask, and it comes out harsher than you planned.
“Oh! No, not yet, but there’s a door here, maybe on the other side?” Mirabelle sounds nervous and jumpy. Did you do that? Stars, you’re awful.
Then you think. There’s a door, and you hear someone open it. Claude was before the door. She was, you know it, you can’t have forgotten that, Mirabelle stops you all and says the same thing every time.
Did you all walk past her? Did... did Mirabelle change the script? Because you’re blind now?
Your head hurts. You walk towards the door, and only need to follow the wall for a moment before you reach it, having been pulled from the middle of the corridor by Isabeau. Was that.... because of Claude? Did he pull you out of the way?
When Mirabelle tells everyone to hurry through the safe room, they do so. No one talks about taking a break, and Odile’s stomach doesn’t rumble. You’re through the room without eating or touching the star.
“There!” Bonnie yells, first out of the second door.
“A tear,” Odile says simply. “Two, actually. Pick your poison, Siffrin.”
You chuckle, just a little. Lean right. But you don’t actually know where in the room the tears are. You just know the door to the king is straight ahead.
“Can I lead you to it?” Isabeau offers. You empty your mind, think of nothing, and hold out your hand.
He guides you in an arch. Let’s go of your hand. You reach out, and dream of nothing.
#in stars and time#isat#isat spoilers#isat fic#fanfiction#isat siffrin#eye injury#sif loses the other eye lmao#wrote this is one sitting!!! have had this idea on my mind for so long. very happy to finally sit down#and write it out. feels like I'm 13 again with the way I'm posting this immediately#it's nice to not overthink it and just post when I'm done. do tell me if there are any errors or mispellings#really hope i got the pronouns right. I changed who was speaking at some points#and it would suck if I forgot to change one somewhere#mit#Added a read more because I kinda forgot that was something I could do. Sorry for the long post folks
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hey psst c'mere... no a little closer... a little closer- there we go
Loop lips are part of a racist caricature of Black people. Stop drawing Black characters with loop lips. I don't care how they look in canon, it's racist.
okay that's all you can go
#one piece#usopp#goes for other black characters too but this is the one that comes to mind rn.#not gonna get into other shit like 'lightening their skin to make them look prettier teehee'#or 'but they look better with wavy/straight hair!¡!!' or any of the number of other stuff ive seen#bc like. im not even sure folks can handle this one simple thing lmao#many people are great about this but theres still quite a few who are ass#'um! well the creator did it this way and i like him! and he did it on his white characters too!' dont give a shit.#stop drawing racist caricatures. i like op too but im not riding that guy's dick and twisting myaelf in knots trying to justify all his BS#we can agree he's bad at drawing women and he fumbles how he handles queer characters (sometimes. this is mostly referring to momoiro)#but you can't listen to folks who are constantly saying 'hey this is a racist depiction of black people. please dont draw like that'#like???#im gonna keep it 100 with you guys. i love one piece. its got me through some dark times. ive loved it for a long long time#i dont expect the creator to ever give me the time of day#but english fandom? english fandom i can change. and english fandom i can hold to a BARE MINIMUM standard of 'dont be racist'#and yet i still get disappointed. far more often than i should.#ignorance is one thing but the people who DOUBLE DOWN are the worst#thanks for telling me you prioritize your comfort over not being wildly offensive to me and people like me#idfk where i was going with this im just so goddamn tired#if u wanna know more about what im talking about in the post just look up the wiki for minstrel shows & jim crow
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All this new Earthspark content (i say with a sigh, not liking what i see), just makes me think more about it? Season 1, so good I didn’t need to think about… give or take Shockwave and the rushed end. Season 2? God- and I’m hearing the bloody ‘Decepticon Dome’ is still around for I guess this is season 3 instead of 2b??
I feel like I wanna share my notes for a season 2 rewrite or at least some concepts for one (with some Shockwave edits from season 1) that I had written on… *looks at the date* 28th July just before I started my shift-
Let’s see what happens then :P
First of all, Shockwave.
What do you mean the fucking unethical science guy has issues with what he immediately labels as cybrids? TFP Father-of-Predacons guy? IDW Literally-Becomes-Onyx-Prime guy?
So you’d think my first idea is to turn him not-racist right? Make him curious about the terrans like (using my main Shockwave experience) his Prime’s equivalent interest in predacons, right?
But what if I didn’t, what if he still has that speciesism but… reflavoured it into something more fitting? Say the ‘medical exploitation’ variant of racism that TFES Shockwave can openly claim that ‘I know I’m doing all these unethical experiments to one specific group, but I would do the same for any cybertronus’ to use Mandroid’s scientific name, but really he doesn’t actually desire to experiment on others he might consider the ‘default’. The kind of racism that treats others as scientific wonders in need of full study.
Heh, TFP Shockwave got off lucky, his obsession was predacons and he only knew they were sapient after reviving one from the dead AND discovering it he could transform; something about archeology vs graverobbing :P
Shockwave in the season 1 finale thus has more willingness to work with people who he considers in some way to be lesser, at least different; what’s a good test for a species’ intelligence than watching them problem solve against a corrupt government organisation?
Now onto the actual fucking season 2 notes then shall we?
With GHOST and Mandroid gone we are lacking threats that aren’t the fucking Decepticons again. The Quintessons of course take Mandroid’s role of the active antagonist, the one or ones that act their own agenda divorced from a wider perspective, but who fills GHOST’s role as the passive background threat? Well, as GHOST was the only company/organisation that had extended their hand to establish a proper post-war cybertronian-human alliance, and they seemed to be pretty tied in to either the government or with heavy media scrutiny, in its place could be filled by the actual American government now labelling any and all cybertronian (and terran) presence as criminal behaviour and thus officially rendering them as illegal literal aliens.
I’m not saying this is what the show should’ve done because that is a fucking stretch, but if I’m gonna rewrite Earthspark that’s who I’d want to fill the slot, fanfiction (maybe bayverse) kinda stuff. Maybe for a ‘kid friendly’ ‘not-so-anti-american’ way to make it just a special task force that’s still paramilitary enough to not get conservatives to freak; but let it be known the original idea :P
Back to Mandroid, considering the type (and aesthetic) of his final cybernetics - as well as his sharkticon guards (?) that he from what I remembered freed from somewhere (like a fucking shark pit???) - what if he had in fact made contact with the quintessons and, learning that he was from Earth, they had assumed that humanity and the Malto children were the children of Quintus, they were in fact assumed kin by His abandonment. When Mo ends up waking the executioner, it is still however her cybersleeve that draws it’s attention, yet it is also the terrans that draw its ire as they seem kin to the cybertronians Quintus oh so favoured over them, but also because they are filled with Quintus’ energy and ‘getting in the affairs’ or ‘robbing the power’ of humanity by their disturbance.
It’s not particularly too far off of the actual canon motivations to coming to Earth, as they already view humanity as fellow creations of Quintus even if literally untrue and prefer them to cybertronians and specifically to the maltos, but just imagine them being more anti-cybertronian rather than ‘pick me’ over Quintus’ chosen (one of the better things about 2b/3, the Judge actually acknowledged that the human Maltos were another set of child soldiers chosen for a destiny beyond their years, heh even Prowl agrees).
In a way, with this, both the human government and the quintessons can come to the idea that (for their own reasons and information provided) cybertronian affairs disrupt the human way of life and need to - in one way or another - be punished for their ‘chaos’.
Regardless though, the Emberstone is still shattered, and it’s not coming back (though the characters don’t know that… yet).
What doesn’t happen between it shattering and it’s… let’s say ‘pieces’ for now… is that the Decepticons don’t ‘do what they do best’.
Without GHOST in the way to arrest any Decepticon by virtue of them losing the war, the Autobots can actually begin to offer a genuine chance at armistice. Maybe not full on peace, their existence is a little too criminalised at the moment to immediately settle give or take a millennia worth of war in one sitting, but it is so much easier to prove to the Decepticons that they do in fact have a chance of rest against vorns of war and years of imprisonment and - as much as saying so word for word may begrudge the mecha - can ‘prove’ that they are worth as much freedom as the Autobots so prattle on about if neither of them have power over them in the ways GHOST provided.
What are their current goals? 1) do not get captured by government agents; there’s only so many cybertronians left even with a large concentration in Witwicky, and who knows if GHOST sent their technology back to their military. 2) do not let the government know of the terrans’ existence; with what Mandroid was invested in and what GHOST had intended to learn from him, neither faction nor any of the Maltos want to let the terrans become fugitives or pet projects (the craziest scientist they’ll even begin to consider studying the terrans would be Shockwave but even then they’d prefer even bloody Tarantulas more than him). And 3) gather the Emberstone shards before the government does; if Mandroid literally killed every cybertronian and terran on Earth with one blast of the full thing, what is the strength of one fragment actually measured by?
Given that apparently a shard with just a little bit of water is enough to make an entire spark (or at least, depending on what we learnt from 2a or the designs in 2b/3) act in replacement to a spark, probably decently powerful enough-
But to quote Brennan Lee Mulligan in his quite popular Game Changer, on a planet with 70% water coverage, weather patterns of a few sorts that scatter H2O in its many states to its surface, and all the time in the world between the Emberstone shattering and scattering, it is a “…statistical wonder…” that there were TWO (count them, 2) ‘’’’’’’’’Chaos’’’’’’’’’ terrans throughout - I’ll give it this - the entirety yet exclusively of the Americas.
First of all, FUCK THE TERM ‘CHAOS’ TERRAN! Let’s describe them as shard-spark for now, continuing to use Mandroid’s scientific terms we do not know if there’s a particular biomechanical difference beyond the Emberstone shard to sever the terrans AKA cybertronus terran from their new shattered siblings… or perhaps only cousins.
Second of all, shard-spark terrans are NOT born evil, just troubled in whatever relevant ways their circumstances cause them to be. Most often however without the conflict between the factions, a lot them if they do not happen upon a body of water in a location of dry weather conditions or even unluckily get stuck in a glass display would end up probably already being terrans by the time Autobots, Decepticons and 3rd or 4th party lock onto their signal to track them down from interesting community reports.
You know what was funny? Seeing everyone fall in love with Breakdown projecting a father-son relationship onto Aftermath who conversely didn’t give a shit, because y’all would just see Breakdown imposing that as just the cutest thing ever when he literally didn’t earn the right to think that way about a stranger that happened to be a child.
No, if Breakdown wants his ‘being a parent’ moment, he needs to put his back into it and make an effort to at least fucking try to be a parent? Hell, he can fucking suck at it and maybe even fall into a similar situation where he imposes the parent-child relationship onto a bad relationship, the main caveat being that it isn't supposed to be funny that Aftermath doesn't get it.
Breakdown can be the first contact with a shard-spark terran, maybe a few others or maybe alone, maybe he and Bumblebee took it upon themselves to race towards a shard only to discover a lost child. Instead of the fucking gang recruitment way 2a attempts to explain Aftermath going along with Breakdown, both the racers are mildly freaking out that there's a solitary kid who may or may not be a little fucking pissy right, just in the very spot both their scanners are saying IS the Emberstone shard they've been tracking. It takes a harsher more Decepticon standard demand to get Aftermath to follow either of them over a softer weaker Autobot plea; a force of habit for both of them, even if Breakdown starts actively avoiding Bee's responding glare.
Something about Breakdown associating harsh orders, reprimands and mutual hostility says more about him and his relationship to 'family' than it does on Aftermath sneering at squishy feelings that make him feel weird and preferring the worse treatment since it's the one thing he's got experience in. Something about how in fandom spaces every group of people is immediately turned into found family or just straight up family? Well- considering that Breakdown joined the Decepticons because the Stunticons also had done so (and changing Breakdown's association of Decepticons as family down to Stunticons as family), considering that most iterations of the characters 4 mentally ill soldiers and an abusive leader that actively preys on his team's weaknesses then... heh.
Breakdown finding the bickering and the fighting and the unspoken assumptions of that meaning family... it DOES mean more for Breakdown than it does for Aftermath doesn't it? :P
I don't think I got a good order with this but :P With GHOST gone the Autobots don't have a main base anymore, and by don't I fucking MEAN IT they don't go back to GHOST headquarters after all is said and done; it would be the first place to look for cybertronian activity after the government finds out the closest thing humanity had for bot sympathisers went belly up after all. Between them and the newly freed Decepticons, there is only one neutral ground between them on the Malto farm, but it would be Starscream to bring up stink over it (if even in his mischaracterisation in 2a he labels Autobots as oppressors) siting that the Malto's are functionally civilian and shouldn't - whether or not they could at all in the first place - be responsible for the housing of all these soliders; it's a farm, not a warbase, there is no need to bring more children into their squabble especially with the likelihood of crossfaction shared quarters he'd say.
There is one fortification left to stand against potential government hunting, even if it means to repair defense systems and cloaking devices, even signal scramblers just to hopefully allow rest to those tired of running. None of the Autobots would be happy about it - the Decepticons might disagree seeing it as potentially a little bit funny and as a little bit of petty revenge - but that base may or may not happen to be quite purple in it's paintjob, Decepticon base. To offer the curtsy that none of the 'Cons were given however, the Autobots in addition to the betrayer Megatron would be allowed free reign of the base, give or take a few zones off-limits even to lower ranked Decepticon forces. It's not like the Autobots would have left the base unraided in their time under GHOST's thumb, so there's no doomsday weapons to be wary of anyone activating.
Actual base life doesn't feel horrible for the Decepticons who, thanks in all due part to Megatron's aggressive leadership and hostile work environment, are already particularly used to being near permanently on guard even at rest; if the Autobots still had a base of their own in the local area the Decepticons would've made an easy transition even if still incredibly tense. It takes an extremely disciplined trigger for the Autobots not to snap under the tension, everyone save for Megatron who is used to being on edge, unfortunately for him the Decepticons give him shit constantly and tends to skew towards aggravating him than any of the 'Bots.
However, at the very least the remaining scientists have access to Shockwave's lab, which he might be more willing to share if it helps Wheeljack and Tarantulas to agree to run some tests on the terrans and actually begin to study them to get the full picture, at least as full as they can without dissection which is one of the compromises Shockwave would have to contend with especially if Nightshade wants to be science team buddies with at least the other 2. Either way, probably the least hostile section in the crosshabitation Decepticon base? Mostly because of the fact they're all agreeing to science together rather than punch each other.
But not everyone actually remains in the base, some take off to find better opportunities or because they find the base environment more stiffling than usual real free spirit types, AKA Breakdown. And also why I don't think I ordered this the right way- but I suppose from Emberstone to 'chaos' terran to Aftermath to Breakdown may break if I went no GHOST to no Autobot base to 'don't hide warriors in civilian homes' to Decepticon base to Breakdown to Aftermath... actually no... because then I can go to 'chaos' terran again and bring up Spitfire and others.
So, speaking of...
Shard-spark terrans, while not guaranteed to be trouble-kids so to speak, they are more predisposed to such given the circumstances of their creation in addition to the presence of the shard they are aptly named after. Aftermath is of course a bit of a destruction lover, it feels so good to break things it's often quite the shame that to have a broken thing, you must destroy something that may or may not have a use when it is unbroken. Breaking trees, breaking roads, breaking armour (even if it's a little baby dent to a soldier who's dealt with worse from a kid who didn't even exist up until a week ago), all the same to Aftermath who loves the thrill of it and hates things that make that thrill go away.
Can't even make a dent in that annoying Jawbreaker's armour! Ugh, he'll just have to teach JB to break something for him to make these gross feelings stop AKA JB discovers 'breaking things' stim and (with a bonus quick rewrite of his altmode episode where HE'S the one wreaking havoc on town because 'STOP BABYING HIM' 'WHY WON'T YOU LIKE ME' 'I HAVE AN ALTMODE NOW WHY DON'T YOU PAY ATTENTION TO ME' feelings) feels like really bad about it when he wants to break more things and scream :P good thing his mum's a veteran she can probably get him to do a war cry!
Spitfire kinda immediately did a gifted kid speedrun I think instead, Twitch 2.0 with a better drone model with better and more capabilities and the speed to out fly the out-mode, only up until it is Twitch who is preferred for her softer attitude and willingness to give up all that lets her win for someone else. Look Megatron, if you introduce a 'non-deadly' version of the Polyhex Protocol, maybe make fucking sure there is literally no fucking way for someone to be in immense 'death by falling' danger? Look look look look look- you put a newborn into her first race (btw, created while falling and thus having first hand experience that falling isn't deadly), say it's not to the death, and expect her not to assume that the giant cliff beneath the flying fox was also safe?? And that you had initially planned the Malto CHILDREN to run the course also and yet failed to create a proper safety net, literally or not you have a flight mode you could've played spotter!
Is Spitfire without fault? No, but what do you expect a newborn storm child to know about safety especially with a competitive streak like the one she's fast to develop! You all told her how she has the better altmode and 'better than this' why are you all looking at her like she'd suddenly BROKEN!?
And all these fuckers think they can all hug it out while she stands out in the rain biting and gnawing for attention?! Gross!
:P AKA Spitfire is like 12 (minutes) old and already fallen from grace, no wonder she gets a kick out of mutual 'want to bite people' sibling Aftermath :P
I think these thoughts are spiraling though to be fair my notes are also at this point spiraling-
Spitfire and Aftermath love to brawl with each other, it's too wild to be called sparring but it's not particularly deadly enough to call a battle, though it does get out of hand in ways that Breakdown - if he's still trying for parenthood - isn't even prepared to deal with (bumblebee voice: first time?). During one such brawl, Breakdown alternating between chasing the pair and backing off as they throw in more hits on each other, the kids accidentally run into Skullcruncher and - instead of backing down like someone more in the know - end up dragging him out of his listless reverie when Spitfire dodges Aftermath's double hammerfist after he threw her into the Decepticon.
Now why am I bringing up Skullcruncher is he secretly my favourite character? No, no he really isn't. But considering he's been used as a tool to not only display Mandroid's mind control technology as well as the visible consequences of that technology being used by GHOST, I feel as though he'd been left in the dust to kinda... regress? To disappear into his head? Some fucked up torture coping really, just in a literal brainwashing sense since :P GHOST wanted a pet project test subject. The aforementioned science team, with the help of everyone that was mind controlled and able to tell of it, have been trying to work through the brainfog it seems to have left Skullcruncher with. Regardless of the actual care they have for him specifically, they want to know if there's any actual lingering corruption on a mecha's processor all in due part because of it, to see if it would affect them physically as it had done mentally.
Between Shockwave's calculated response only providing his own experience in cold logic, Hashtag's experience (Shockers listing her under 'confounding variable' because of her status as a terran) having been used to connect her to Starscream when it counted the most whether or not she was good at playing therapist as a child full of fears and no wisdom, and Megatron nearly gunning down a kid he believed to be the hope of all cybertronian kind (all of the science team is reminded of how he has changed, how he now feels guilt over the future he could've failed instead of snuffing it out himself without mind), there may be a few networks rewired via the cybertronian equivalent of neuroplasticity... but the results so far are inconclusive and it's looking more and more likely to just be biopsychological placebo and coping mechanism Skullcruncher invariably got himself stuck in.
But getting dragged into the antics of laughing yet snarling children, going around beating each other around base not out of malice but out of pure enjoyment and glee, being chased around by someone who has the time and freedom - if not, the ability to be panicked about something so relatively small - to try and deal with the situation? Sure, the first strike is always surprising, and maybe he panicked with something violent in response. But the shard-spark siblings were already in the ebb and flow of their fight, if they got caught or grazed by jaws, if they got hit or dodged a sweep of claws, they'll fight like they always enjoyed. Skullcruncher may not be fully present, may not ever be, but hey... maybe those kids can help fight away the monotony and get him out of his head, out of the past the same faces of over a million years couldn't get to sooner.
Something like that?
And to give more love to other side characters that don't even get voices, why not some more Insecticon content- hell, why not a shard-spark terran who becomes an Insecticon, or at least has a bug altmode that caters to their personality. The 'sit alone inside the tube of a playground set all recess' type, the 'uses thoughts to give themselves company' type, the 'weird loner' type who's non-verbal and asocial? A very patient praying mantis, who takes the bugs outside when they're in and wants to show others the cool little creatures? To BE a bug?
Breakdown, who's willingly tied himself down to who he immediately claimed as his kid... his kids now? He... let's Spitfire decide for herself if she wants to be that but... Aftermath calls him 'old man', that's... that's what humans call their 'dad' right? They both make his spark ache and he's growing more and more confused at why he doesn't just run, take to the streets and drive away where his spark can be free again. But the idea sends his systems into a stronger more whole-body version of the feeling, shooting through his chest down through his arms and legs, in ways that feel familiar but... warmer than with any of the Stunticons.
Bumblebee, who was more or less stuck with the Maltobots as Optimus changed his mission, having gotten to actually learn from them as they learnt from him; he knows the feeling, he knows it strongly. And if they get to hang out more now that they aren't actively fighting each other - though I guess it's still a mutual 'hiding from the government' thing isn't it - they might get to talking about it.
"Yeah, that's just classic worry for you." "Bee, I KNOW what worry feels like, we've been at war for Primus knows how long!" He hated the way it sounded like Bumblebee was brushing him off, emphasised with waving of his hand like he was dusting his plating. If his 'cool' slipped well, the 'Bot didn't press him on it. "Always worrying about dying, worrying about energon. Pit! Worried about shrapnel to the wheels, can't keep beating you in races if my tires blow." Maybe not the best thing to bring up considering... "This is different." It has to be, because he knows he worried about the Stunticons, and they were his family. But... "Breakdown," When did he look away? Breakdown turned back to face Bee, "it's worry FOR them. It's... it's a worry because you care? I care about the Maltos, for the humans AND the terrans, and... I feel worried about them?" He can't help it, Breakdown laughs. A quiet chuckle really, turned snickers as Bumblebee's expressions twist. "HEY! What's so funny about that!?" Just in time to feel a fist beat against his shoulder - right on that afformentioned wheel, hah - even though his optics are narrowed and dentae bared, Bee vents out a laugh he tried and failed to hide. "Mr Never-Settle-Down hiding some wisdom I missed?" He squints at the name but doesn't let that stop his smirk. "Hah, come on Bee, you said it like you were such an expert before! But look who's confused now, right? Because 'classic worry' is so hard to explain." Bumblebee shoves against Breakdown's chassis, venting out another huff. "Okay sure, I'm not perfect at explaining it but!" "You care about them, these new... shard-spark terrans?" Aftermath, Spitfire, almost instantly that burst of 'classic worry' runs his systems wild. "I'm not an expert, so don't quote me on anything but..." He offered up his hand, beckoning for Breakdown to take it in one bold move. "I can help with what I do know, yeah? You've got one handful of kids don't you." With another pulse of his spark, the 'classic worry' - that 'worry FOR them' emotion - shivers down his wires and back up to his chest. Wordlessly, Breakdown takes up the offer with a small quick nod of acknowledgement, and feels the residual tingle simmer. It's not the same feeling with the Stunticons, this kind of worry but... maybe that's a good thing. "Good talk, Feelings-Expert, now why don't I the Winning-Expert take you up on that race?"
Can you tell I hate the first episode of season 2b/3?
Get prepared for a mood shift, we'll be talking about GHOST again!
Obviously because GHOST going defunct and maybe so suddenly it's hard for anyone to corral it under control of the next in rank, it IS an entire organisation after all, there would be quite a few lingering resources within the building itself that the government may be interested in let alone the mecha that would be at a disadvantage to those who would access such resources. Mind control technology and research (definitely don't want the government having that), anti-cybertronian weapons and restraining tools, the fucking GHOST harddrives that were placed in the fucking public recycle centre A YEAR AFTER GHOST FUCKED OFF AND DIED!? Yep that's all getting scavenged, at least as best as they can be while the government is extracting as much resources they can without needing to be sneaky about it.
Hah, considering the lows GHOST is willing to go, one such section - another where the cybertronians can't seem to access one way or another - ends up leading to a morgue of cybertronians, Autobot AND Decepticon. Some of course were known casualties, others are now confirmed dead rather than missing, but missing is an apt term. Missing limbs, missing parts, missing heads. Open chests, open sparks, open processors. Cybertronians were only machines to GHOST, only machines to Mandroid, only machines to manipulate and not even mind control... reprogram would be the term more accurate.
With a well of supply for how cybertronian brains may work, of course someone could eventually slap a remote control onto them and pilot them like a puppet on strings, and it's something something pretty horrific yada yada robot corpse desecration is like nothing on human TV screens.
Hmm... as I said I did like that Prowl acknowledge that hey maybe kids shouldn't get involved with war (even if it might've been framed as 'are we sure children are capable of doing adult responsibilities), so I wonder if I should continue with what my July 28th notes say about him or not... hmm...
Okay! MAYBE! I think it could work?
ANYWAY! Villain Prowl who is a stickler for the rules, villainous only in the way a lawmaker is (read: maker) and collaborating with the government to work cybertronians into the system so that they may be apart of the judicial system, which uh fittingly reflects the quintesson motivation and probably would be really cool to parallel the two. Prowl finds out about human war crimes and goes 'hoo boy some if not a whole fucking many of these laws have been violated by the cybertronian war' and resolves to fix it, but under American government cannot do anything official nor fair while the law only considers humanity. Something something 'cybertronians shouldn't be held to human standard law' yada yada 'so you think yourself above it!?'
Maybe not VILLAIN Prowl per say, more antagonist Prowl who wants to atone for the crimes committed on Earth's surface and give back justice to the people but doing so in the only way he knows how, like a cop. Or at least like a second in command/high ranking Autobot commander and advisor, doing his 'due diligence' to make sure that justice is served and that crimes are punished, which I mean ACAB and all he's still a bastard about it by doing it AS FUCKING SOON as GHOST collapses or at least working actively after the fact but :P
Hah and yeah, Prowl would be stiff lipped about children engaging in conflict. For all the bastard cops that oh so value the punishment part of crime fighting, there are laws in other areas (especially around war) that are to the benefit of the innocent. It's just that war crimes seem to really be listed down after the war has official come to an end and the cybertronian war is still in armistice as of now, in due part because Prowl has committed to atoning NOW of all times :P
This was a bit of a mess, I hope you derive some enjoyment out of this
#shockwave#tfes shockwave#breakdown#tfes breakdown#aftermath#tfes aftermath#spitfire#tfes spitfire#skullcruncher#tfes skullcruncher#prolly one of the rare times he's been tagged :P#bumblebee#tfes bumblebee#prowl#tfes prowl#breakbee#transformers#tfes#earthspark#shardspark#aka the name of the rewrite i think#tfes rewrite au#maccadam#ghk lmao look at the date now :P#i think i tagged only really the major players#hmm should i tag fic because there's a section for that?#prolly not folk would assume this whole thing is fic#so you'll get a treat#the fic section is meant to be breakbee but you can feel free to read only platonic care into that it's fine#i'm not good at trying to write big long fics but i can probably crank out a few short ones
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wizard looking for a way home (aka wizard of dark space)
#pokemon#swsh#champion leon#wizard leon babeyy!#thank u to cosme for hangin out with me while I figure this one out lol#this! is the piece I used for the ''speedpaint'' thingy btw. I'll try to put together the video over the next month or so#lol. usually when I make wizard leon designs I riff with what comes up and think abt like. maybe his affinity in this set#like ''oh he'd do fabric talismans. oh he'd levitate. he does poppet stuff''#that at most. but this. the moment I started fleshing this one out I was like#oh he's really lost. for a very long time. to the point he's learned so much he's forgotten what many of the things on his suit does#like lmao I guess I can Not be normal about any astronaut leon huh!! its chronic for me#I couldnt get to some of the questions folks asked with this one. so this video will probably not be comprehensive#but I'll make another when those things come up!!#fksjdfk sorry lads most of u guys asked abt colors but idk if this ones the best for that. its got a preddy concrete palette#guess I can save talking about the more insane color stuff for when that comes up too...#we'll see!! hope it's gonna happen#for now. one more wizard leon for the book. have a good night lads!#tie a yarn round ur wrist dont forget the way back
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🎁 + magnus!
Image description:
a textpost reading: "take his ass to the timeloop"
a headline reading: "Best friends each secretly think of the other as the sidekick"
a screenshot from an animated Garfield cartoon showing the cast of characters smiling cheerfully, while text overhead reads: "the world you were born in no longer exists"
a tweet reading: "if you hear me telling the same story twice just let it go. i only have like six memories and they all take turns"
a textpost reading: "to the prankster who put 'the moon' as the address on their online pizza delivery order: thanks a whole dang lot. i was up there for like ten minutes just aimlessly waiting, ringing the doorbell, kicking moon rocks around"
a box that's labeled with a picture of a simple wooden bird, and the text: "comfort bird carving kit for beginners"
End description.
#fex i think you might've actually sent me at least one of these but i don't remember which ones lmao#if *you* remember which one no you don't#but anyways i think a lot about magnus only having memories of well under a third of his life and like#no wonder he brings up his folk hero background every episode! that's truly ALL that he's got!#taz#taz balance#taz balance spoilers#magnus burnsides#rosalia answers#ask meme#long post
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saw a post about projecting your ethnicity onto a character and started missing vespa ilkay. so so bad
#pov u grow up in a 3rd world country(/planet) where healthcare workers are exported by the thousands like cheap produce to richer countries#it's your ticket out of poverty as long as you can deal with the loneliness the separation from everyone you know the discrimination etc#ive never talked about my hc that vespas mother was one of them sending money every month visiting every couple of years until it just stop#like why return to the swamps when youre doing fine working on a richer planet w much better living conditions#cost of living rises every year. sending home a % of your salary used to be enough to support your husband and daughter and then it isnt#you know how it goes#vespa is also dead set on this path until ranga realizes that hemorrhaging healthcare workers leaves them with little to none of their own#students on scholarships or in community/state universities are bound by return service agreements and are forbidden to leave the country#until theyve rendered a few years of work on ranga to pay back their tuition + as a really shitty solution to the brain drain problem#this is real in my country btw but my professors say a lot of ppl do break their rsa's and fucked off to work in other countries LOL#our state unis can barely afford decent facilities they do nottt have the budget to chase down their own alumni in other countries!#but the mental image is a bit funny#vespa ilkays first crime: tinakasan ang rsa#i do also think it lines up with her having a network of med friends everywhere in the galaxy (heart of it all) you kind of go into pre/med#expecting most of your classmates to leave to work in other countries eventually. mine are aiming for the usa / uae / europe / japan etc#anyway whether vespa breaks her rsa or not she leaves ranga asap decides to switch careers and the rest is history#i also deeply love the fact that she's superstitious i'm very sad it wasn't highlighted more (i've only heard s1-3)#as someone who did grow up in a rural area and went to more albularyos/folk healers than doctors in my childhood. (they never failed me)#lots of folk illnesses (ex. balis; pasma) local medical superstitions (dont eat noodles in hospital; youll have a really toxic shift) etcc#theres also a lot of potential in tying her past as a rangian + med student + assassin to me idk how to word this properly#being raised on cautionary tales of not to touch/disturb anything in the swamps then being given free reign to poke & prod at things in her#lab classes (now with the proper ppe)....she was having so much fun with the curemother prime too lmao#years of walking hanging bridges docks boathouses in ranga etc gave her great balance & stealth#cracking open alien shellfish in the swamps to cutting open bodies for studying then for assassination....#I MISS HER SO MUCH BALIK KN SAKEN 😭😭😭😭😭😭#i get why most people + the canon focuses on her being an assassin bc people find that cooler i guess#but vespa being a swamp girl > 3rd world med student > assassin is so personal To Me. the whole pipeline. eugh.#skl.txt
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Back to work
#blabbering#curse my long shifts#I just feel so desperate for socialization#feels like a bit of the same thing from before during my bad week#I guess I just yearn for my life to be less hollow than it just me going to work and coming home and that’s it#been trying so hard to initiate it too but I think I’m just cursed#it’s even effecting my ability to draw bc one reason why I’m so slow is bc it’s such a lonely activity#so I can only get bits and pieces done in small bursts and videos don’t cut it anymore for (the illusion of) company#but mostly I just feel a bit pathetic and lonely lmao#maybe I’m just depresso and it’s making me be like this lol. this is usually a traditional winter experience for me#I think I’m also just yearning for connections bc I’ve been deprived of them for so long lol#I just can’t seem to succeed at it for some reason.#I’m also frustrated bc I haven’t had much time to draw; and when I do that time is taken away for other things and it’s like; my main venue#for socializing with folks and just for myself bc I can’t do what I enjoy doing#and then when I do I can’t focus at all and then I feel lonely and the cycle continues
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...prayer circle for izzy hands
#ofmd#ofmd s2 spoilers#i'm actually getting nervous for jenkins et al for tomorrow bc if they do kill off izzy i fear there will be a riot lmao#i'm so on the fence#because part of me is like 'djenks would never do that - he loves izzy's character and no one perma-dies on this show'#and narratively it would be strange (though not completely out of the realm of possibility) for him to die after this whole arc#and surely the whole team is aware that folks would be furious#(me personally i'm down with whatever happens so long as it fits the story but i know a lot of folks would be legit upset)#but i cannot shake those images from the bts of person-who's-definitely-con lying on the deck as ed puts a coat over him#and then the funeral and grave on the beach#THAT ALL BEING SAID i'm holding onto that one reviewer on twitter who saw the finale already#and said they have as much faith if not more in jenkins and co after the finale#i do find it hard to believe they'd really sacrifice izzy like that#even though i can imagine at least one scenario that would make it plausible but it would still be kinda shitty#I just... mmmm.....i really dont know how this will go#and im afraid to be around fandom when or if it does lol#ultimately my greatest fear is that if they do kill him or another beloved character off it affects our renewal chances#like no matter what happens yall gotta campaign hard
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gnashing my teeth rn
snarling and biting at people that rip off other peoples oc's characterisations and backstories, it costs $0.00 to come up with your own concepts and you get the bonus of not shitting on other people and being able to exercise your own creativity. there is so much of it in the rpc and i have seen it happen to friends and had it happen to myself, like just stop swinging off of others coat tails because we put heart and soul into these characters not just for someone to come along and think that looks fun and go yoink :) i just
#;; ooc.#;; venting.#will people in the rpc chill the fuck out#if you want inspiration turn to media not to other peoples characters it's not hard#like yes there are common concepts out there and you can coincidentally cross lines with people#but there's a point where it's obvious and people start to notice lmao#i used to be way more open on tumblr but now when i encounter a character that's similar to drath i tend to swerve#because i just dont want repeats#which sucks because i LOVE these kinds of characters but after that experience it just makes me 🫠#and then seeing it happen to friends makes my blood boil#there is something so insidious about it tbh#and you know theyre the ones that will also just take someones art and use it without permission or credit too lmao#i just *drags my hands down my face* it's free to not be a dickhead and so much easier#also this isnt at anyone here these folks have been long since blocked im just 😬👍
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for a long while when I'd visit my relatives on the chesapeake for a brief respite from the hells of home life, there was an odd beat-up little cardboard box sitting amid the plastic-cased ds games in the gamestop I'd always visit (rarely to actually get anything)
finally, one time before the journey back to hell, i actually had a scattering of bills in my pocket. after looking around at the shelves of shovelware (i didnt have enough for any of the proper titles like mario or pokemon), i finally decided to bring the story to a close and give the ragged little box a home
it was Sola-to-Robo, one of the rarest ds games ever published, possibly the most technically advanced engine ever devised on the system, and among the most unique and emotional experiences I'd ever encountered in a video game (which is saying something considering I'd already all but lost emotion by that point)
i barely remember it anymore, but for the time it became my favorite standalone game of all time (although it technically is part of a series, succeeding the PS1's equally obscure Tail Concerto)
I still dream of returning to it and seeing just how well it holds up from a more experienced point of view
the one thing i do remember is that it had and still has by far the most beautiful and powerful opening song of any game ive ever encountered, which is saying something considering the hundreds out there! it's up there with Atelier Meruru's Cadena
also the fact that when you beat the game, after the credits it goes "chapter 2" and there's an entire sequel within the game. altogether both parts are probably not longer than any other rpg, but on the original ds where full 3d action rpgs were resource intensive and typically limited in scope, it was mindblowing
also it apparently had like undefeatable copy-protection and to this day still requires a modified rom to emulate or even run on original hardware without a card?
anyways.... remarkable game. i was shocked to find that it's one of the most sought after titles on the system. in rarities ive personally enountered it's second probably only to Retro Game Challenge, which I encountered at regular price once in the late 2010s but didnt have the money for at the time... that's my "one that got away"
#for me it's also up there with klonoa and a handful of old sonic titles for having anthro designs that are actually great instead of weird#i always start thinking anthro designs are just a lost cause but then i remember like solatorobo and redwall and beatrix potter and am like#“no theres tons of room for animal folk in art it's just that modern 'furryism' is usually so soulless and based on corporate mascot styles#anyways..... my short recollection of a remarkable game#hotel dusk and last window are very rare too but theyre so obscure their prices aren't actually that high#tingle's rosy rupeeland wasnt expensive either back in the day but i bet it's gone way up now. wish i got it back then#mario 3-on-3 is another one that's insanely rare but absolutely no one remembers or cares about it lmao#i found it at a gamestop in ass-nowhere shenandoah in 2020 long after the stores were supposed to have done away with their ds collections#anyways..... original ds is a favorite system of mine... not actually for nostalgia reasons (i barely experience any anymore)#but for the sheer variety and uniqueness of titles to be discovered on it... maybe the most of any platform ever#and the fact that many of them had SSS-tier stylistic direction#ive yet to find another title that even comes close to the blue-skies beauty of bomberman land ds#OG ds was definitely a blue-skies system
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ok.. but I hadn't Realised how weird and icky ASMR/binaural could be for hard of hearing folks. For me, certain noises like mouth and chewing (aughgaufhj autism damage) will make me crumple in disgust. Would u wanna elaborate what it's like for you? 👀👀
Oh! I can certainly try my best! Thank you for asking! :)
It's been I'm not sure HOW long since I last listened to ASMR, but from what I remember it mostly depends on the voice! Higher pitched voices tend to hurt more; if someone has a deeper voice I have both a much easier time understanding them and it doesn't hurt or "ring" in my ears as much, if that makes sense.
Although for me, most things actually tend to hurt to SOME degree, and some times I don't even notice it's hurting until I start getting a headache and I realize like "oh hey this is too loud and my ears have been ringing the whole time" or something.
My damaged hearing feels like a curse lmao. I'm constantly having to adjust the volume of every single video/show/game I watch, especially if it has either poor volume mixing or different volume levels for different sounds.
I said it at the beginning, but ASMR specifically sort of "rings" in my ear, almost like tinnitus? Honestly, a good example of this is from a horror movie me and my fam watched yesterday: It's called The Final Wish and it came out in 2018 and stars Michael Welch as the main character. But in this movie (it's really fucking bad fair warning), once we finally get to see the monster and every proceeding time we see the monster, it comes with this INCREDIBLY high pitched ringing noise. It hurt so fucking bad I had to leave the room when the monster showed up because I just couldn't hear over it and it left the ringing noise in my ear for hours after the movie.
But that's kind of what ASMR is like for me? Especially if the speaker has a higher voice. Outside of pitches, ASMR also just makes me so viscerally uncomfortable so even if their voice itself don't get me the fact that it's so close to my ear WILL LMAO
Also, totally understand the chewing noises, me too bestie!
#i hope this makes sense or was helpful XD#it's been sooo long since i listened to ASMR#and most times when i do it's cause someone is doing a bit in a video#but from what i remember that's sort of what it feels like#but tbh MOST painful sounds ring in my ears like that it's not really just ASMR specific#ALSO im NOT knocking anyone with higher pitched voices#i have an incredibly high pitched voice myself but the pitch of someones voice can indeed hurt#for me at least im not sure if it's the same for any other hard of hearing folk#tbh i'd like to get hearing aids but i don't have the money for em#maybe one day :^)#thanks fer listening LMAO#ask
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it feels kind of weird being an artist that mainly draws animal people n anthros & that being the main kind of thing people usually come to my page for, but not being able to relate to like most of the furry community in general (specifically when it comes to art + kind of characters i draw)
#this isn't supposed to be anything negative abt furries i just feel like my characters do Not really fit the category of “furry”#or at least when you think abt what a furry “Should” look like by the community or every1 else#folks tend to find my anthro art first and like those more than anything. but find that most of my art which is just my ocs mind you#isn't just your generic furry Art bc my ocs are either very humanoid or flat faced lil guys & disappointing ppl scares me lol#i feel like they're in a weird limbo between “too humanoid-looking to be anthro” and “too many animal traits to be humanoid”#but maybe that's just me idk how to really word this correctly?#i have a few reasons why i don't rly call myself a “furry artist” or my ocs “furry” & this is one of those reasons#but i'm not getting into those other reasons cause. yeah lmao???#yadda yadda my art + ocs are too niche to belong in the community but it's not like i ever called myself part of it anyway & don't want to#vent-ish post this got a bit long here sorry o_o#ceph.txt
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