#this is a guarantee
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
yaboiiskinnypenis000 · 2 years ago
Text
next time a bitch I don’t fw shows up in my dreams me and all the dream people are jumping you for real bitch
1 note · View note
emotional-moss · 1 year ago
Text
idk y’all should treat fat men better. and i don’t mean mildly chubby guys i mean honest-to-god love-handles-and-double-chins fat guys. stop calling them shit like discord mods or gross weebs or nasty creeps or neckbeards or that they’re stinky or sweaty or beer bellied or whatever else. fatphobia isn’t cute, even repackaged in a neat little box of “ew men”
81K notes · View notes
fosliie · 3 months ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
The end result of my own reckless impulsivity
17K notes · View notes
spooksier · 6 months ago
Text
how am i supposed to move on with my day know rebecca sugar just posted the messiest pearlrose content imaginable in the year of our lord 2024
13K notes · View notes
great-and-small · 8 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
Anyone else think the “phantom cat shaver” might be an inside cat vigilante trying to send a message? This is already making some Brits say they’ll keep their cats indoors.
19K notes · View notes
agendermetalbender · 5 months ago
Text
You cannot vote your way out of fascism.
But you can sit and allow fascists to vote you into fascism.
Which is a problem, since you cannot vote your way back out.
Fascists would love nothing more than for you to abstain from voting.
8K notes · View notes
maeamian · 4 months ago
Text
Part of the reason that Republicans are so desperately acting like they will never lose again is because they are deeply terrified that this is their last real chance to win. The big orange dipshit came in and gutted the party of everyone who wasn't a loyalist, which left it full of nasty little gremlins who have gaping voids where charisma and human decency is supposed to go.
They still hold a lot of power, but if we stop them this year the next presidential election may not be the Most Important One Of Your Life™, that's not a guarantee or anything, but if they don't win here and now their future looks grim, this dipshit is the only guy they have left and he's extremely diminished and has his brains leaking out of his ears at this point. We can beat him into the ground.
So that's what we're gonna fucking do. We're gonna break these fucking fash. They will crash upon us and we're gonna break their fucking necks. When they come for us they will lose because they're fucking losers and we have each other's backs which is something they fundamentally are incapable of comprehending.
7K notes · View notes
mr-malumm · 9 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
Morning routine of local TV star
21K notes · View notes
utilitycaster · 11 months ago
Text
"why should I get invested in shows if they'll just get canceled" I was deeply invested in Heroes (2006) and it was not canceled, it just got really terrible. I also got really invested in the sandwich I had a few weeks ago despite it only lasting like 15 minutes. You must embrace the ephemeral. You must be willing to love things that may not love you back, that might betray you, or that may die an untimely death. As the great philosopher Mr. Mitchell Lee Hedberg said "I'm not gonna stop doing something because of what happens at the end."
18K notes · View notes
timeflow-sex · 3 months ago
Text
reblog to squeeze prev's ass
7K notes · View notes
Text
We all know the semi-canonical ‘all the Robins know to hide/duck inside of Batman’s cape, even as adults’ thing.
We also know that Danny ‘is LITERALLY a ghost’ Fenton sucks at remembering his own intangibility while ALSO forgetting to look ahead of him.
All I’m saying is, Danny Fenton (or Phantom, if you’d really like) would absolutely SLAM into Batman on accident while running on roof tops and Bruce ‘Brooding Instinct’ Wayne doesn’t even think twice about letting the kid hide and scanning around for danger before there’s a record scratch of ‘wait who tf is this?’ kicks in.
3K notes · View notes
podcastwizard · 10 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
someone post the dancing crab it feels appropriate
13K notes · View notes
atomikku · 3 months ago
Text
3K notes · View notes
ayellowapple · 6 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
Phone call
7K notes · View notes
canisalbus · 6 months ago
Note
*carefully picks you up and peeks into your conch snail shell*
Ehm... Sorry to bother, but... Could we, maybe, possibly... see Vasco's wife and her lover pictured by your hand? Sorry again, thank you for listening. Take care.
*delicately lays you back into the water to prevent any stress or dehydration*
Unfortunately I don't have her lover figured out yet, but I think Ludovica looks something like this:
Tumblr media
4K notes · View notes
last-laments · 7 months ago
Text
"Steven isn't solely responsible for the paywall shift" and "Nobody wants to watch Steven eat insanely expensive food and have to pay for it" are statements that can coexist btw.
5K notes · View notes