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#this is 2 more years i can live in peace
cashmere-caveman · 6 months
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shogun ep. 9 is just bisexual suicide speed chess toxic breakup edition
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terraos · 2 months
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Having to decide if I should be delusional or accept reality (which I cannot do without crying)
#save me from this hell#reading ''if lymphoma has spread to other organs and has affected the lungs the prognosis is not good'' man he really has no chance huh#like there's nothing i can do that will save him#which i think everyone but me has really accepted#i just think that if i try the chemotherapy and whatever else they decide as treatment then it will work and he'll live#but even then he really doesnt have any longer than a few years#and i have to decide if i really want to prolong his suffering and pursue treatment just for him to keep getting worse#because now that it's spread so much is it really worth it#of course there's the little itty bitty chance that he'll enter remission but he won't be fully cured#i just have to prepare to lose him#and it's either spend all this money on treatment so he'll live another 2 years at most if we're lucky.#or just make the rest of his time on earth more comfortable which just seems like the better thing to do the more i think about it#like I have to be at the hospital and listen to the vet and ask questions which i can't do#because the only time we have to take him is on a day when i have work#and by then the longer we wait the less time we have#i just don't know what to do#i don't want him to suffer#i want to be hopeful and assume the best but it's so hard when it's something so serious#i just keep looking over at him and starting to cry#he looks so peaceful even though he's in so much pain#sorry for depression-posting but i have to talk into the void to try to get this out
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moinsbienquekaworu · 1 year
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Also. The weird girl in school feeling of both intense jealousy and violent repulsion towards "normal" girls.
#this post brought to you by: the normaler girls i follow on insta and the stories they post#like these three girls. two of them from the same university as me. the other one also french. all in the same city as me#all exchange students at the same uni in england!#but they're going on day trips to london and living their best year abroad#and i'm - what. staying at home and making soup? sleeping and failing to buy postcards?#the warring impulses of jealousy and repulsion.#because. i want to be normal too. i want my life to be simple and nice and easy.#i want to be a pretty girl who's doing it right. i want to have my life together (somewhat) (for my age and status)#i want girlfriends in the straight way who i can have daytrips with.#i long for the simplicity of asking out cute boys and aesthetic study sessions that actually pay off#i am so blindingly jealous of them. they're so much more normal than me. they're doing Girlhood and Womanhood correctly.#but at the same time i would rather die than change so much i'd be that girl#because i am simply not that person. this is not who i am at my core#i do not want to buy startbucks. i don't want relationship drama. i don't want to put all my personal data on instagram#i do not actually want to force myself to fit into the restrictive mold of what normal and socially acceptable girlhood and womanhood are#so i feel both 1) left behind and inadequate like i'm back in middle school#2) but also at peace with the fact that you can't get along with everyone and i'm old enough to find my people now#i mean my housemates are really cool and i have other friends that are also the kind of nerdy weirdo people i hang out with#AND 3) inadequate for general 'i'm a fucking child' reasons#they're independent. they're spontaneous. they're just doing things. they're on the way to adulthood. they're in their early 20s.#what am i then but a child. i don't go out much i don't drink i have this huge aura of no romance#i need structure and plans and i have a lot of inertia#and i thought the adult thing was going well! i'm feeding myself all on my own! i'm planning my days!#i'm doing laundry and cleaning up messes! look at the adult!#she's not done baking but i was expecting much much worse honestly. i was braced for a total crumble#but no we're good. i felt proud of myself#and here i see people having the normal typical year abroad experience. and i'm not#i'm being childish and i'm wasting money doing the exact same thing i'd be doing at home but in england#anyway. 2:30. sleep time. good night#wow i have a ramble tag now
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orcelito · 1 year
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Tally's just a liiiiittle bit fed up with my clinginess today
Can't help it tho. She's my baby.
#speculation nation#and i spent an hour in a panic spiral over her and then 5 more hours compartmentalizing and Not Thinking About It#she's fine though. just got a little sick this morning but she seems to be feeling better.#probably just ate smth she wasnt supposed to. it happens.#but ykno. i hesitate to throw around the word 'trauma' willy-nilly. considering it has a lot of weight to it.#but i really do think ive got some trauma due to the cat deaths.#how else would i explain me having a whole panic spiral over tally just throwing up?#it almost makes me wonder whether i should bother with more cats after them. but i know i couldnt live without them.#ive spent all but 3 years of my entire life living with cats. i cant live without them.#but after some untimely ends i am just... so fucking afraid.#tally's about 3 years old now. she should have plenty of life left to live.#but cassy wasnt even 2 years old. and look how that turned out.#i got young cats purposefully bc i didnt want to have to say goodbye to them for a While. and then i had to anyways.#and im always so fucking anxious that im going to have to again. constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop#so when Anything happens i end up a total mess no matter how minor it is...#im sick of it. im so sick of the uncertainty. sick of being scared ill wake up one day to another cat dying.#and theres not really any way to make it better. days and weeks and months and hopefully years#just spent waiting for the other shoe to drop.#i just hope it wont come for a while still. so i can have at least a few years of peace.#animal death ment/#negative/#sorry for the vent etc etc im just. i wish i could bundle them up and keep them in my life forever.#but it doesnt work that way unfortunately. lifetime disparity really is so awful.
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littlegermanboy · 2 months
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hi everyone, i've been speaking to my friend reem (@danashehab) and she has told me of her difficulties in reaching her fundraising goal to evacuate herself and her family from gaza. her messages break my heart, and i want nothing more than to help her achieve her dream.
before october 7th, reem, her husband, and their five beautiful children, the youngest of which is less than 2 years old, lived in the north of gaza. her husband, fahed, owned a gym which served as their family's source of income.
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however, they have since been displaced numerous times after the destruction of their home and fahed's gym. reem's children suffer from the anxiety and terror of growing up in genocide, and reem suffers from the uncertainty of their situation, unsure of what to do or say to give her children hope; this is only made worse by the fact that their campaign has been moving at a snail's pace as of recently.
if you're able, please donate whatever you're able to help reem and her family. reem's endless love for her family and her children are palpable in every message i receive for her, and it is clear that everything she does is for them. as of july 30th, €27,420 / €50,000 has been raised, which is just over half of their goal. if you're unable to donate, please reblog and share to other platforms so reem's family can reach their goal as soon as possible. they deserve to live a life of peace and happiness, safe from the threat of genocide.
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intersex-support · 2 months
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Help an intersex family in Gaza!
Hi everyone. I'd like to share about a fundraiser that is very important to me. A good friend of mine is in contact with the organizers.
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(Described in alt).
Their story:
"Hello, my name is Abeer. I'm organizing this fundraising campaign from Belgium on behalf of my family, who currently live in Gaza. 
Since October 7, all families in Gaza have been subjected to genocide. My family is one of those families that has had to flee its own home several times because of the threat of regular attacks. 
After two months, my family decided to return home and take the risk of being bombed at any moment rather than stay in the street. Our 4-floor building now contains over 100 people who have fled from different parts of Gaza. We always open our hearts for our own people, but we can't do it without your help and support. 
My parents, Kamal (53) and Moukaram (51), are suffering from the war because of their age and health. My brother Suliman, his wife Rawan Abualnaja and their two-year-old daughter Bisan are trying to stay strong, but it's complicated by their little daughter's enormous needs. My other siblings who are not married are Mohammed 25, Inas 22, Ibrahim 17, Abdallah 15.
My family medical condition during the war:
My father suffers from delusional disorders. He can't work or help my family financially. Mohammed and Ibrahim suffer from a chronic disease, congenital adrenal hyperplasia. It is difficult for them to obtain medication in Gaza. One of their medicines has not been available in Gaza for two years. During the war, they couldn't get their medicines because they simply didn't exist anymore. My family members are still suffering. They don't want to be potential victims. They want to escape death and live like other families on the planet.
 On 01/01/2024, they attacked the local mosque and the missile failed to explode and ended up in front of my family's house. My family is in danger and the missile will explode any second.
Since then, my family has decided to be evacuated from Gaza because of the senseless attack on our city. Please help me evacuate my family to Egypt so that they can rebuild their lives in peace.
I've been in Belgium for over five years. I feel useless because I haven't been able to do much except try to help them with their daily living expenses. That's why we created this campaign. We're raising funds to evacuate my family to Egypt, a place that offers a glimmer of hope and stability. However, the cost of the evacuation is high, hence our call for crowdfunding.
Every contribution makes a difference The funds we raise will be used for :
- Evacuation from Gaza for both families (Rafah border crossing fees for 9 people total)  - Two months of temporary living expenses in Egypt, including food, shelter, and transportation  - Passport fees  - Food expences untill they leave Gaza 
No matter how small your contribution, it can make all the difference in breaking the cycle of violence and uncertainty. By supporting our campaign, you are offering a lifeline to our families so that they can rebuild their lives, heal from their trauma and make a fresh start in a safe and secure environment. Please leave a comment and share our campaign with your friends, so we can reach more people and make a bigger impact. Together, we can make a difference!"
They are using a French platform called Papayoux Solidarite instead of GoFundMe. Abeer also has a Paypal account for non European donors.
They are currently at 33 588,78 €/ 50,000 €.
Let's see if we can get them to 34,000 today. Any donation matters, even $1 or $2 donations can add up.
We need to help them meet their goal. Intersex liberation means intersex liberation everywhere--it is so important that we show up in solidarity. Those of us living with CAH know how dangerous salt wasting crises are without medication, and how important it is to urgently help Mohammed and Ibrahim get access to the medications they need to support their CAH. Intersex solidarity means that we need to show up and support intersex people facing genocide.
If you can't donate, please share. Consider doing an art raffle to raise money. Do whatever you can to help this family because it is urgent, and we need to act in solidarity with them now and make sure that the intersex community is here to support them!
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miratamer · 2 months
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⚠️🚨🚨 Help us survive the starvation in Gaza 🚨🚨⚠️
I know you've seen countless campaigns and may feel overwhelmed or even fed up with sharing them, and I completely understand. I realize that I'm launching this campaign late, but despite everything, I still hold onto the hope that you might be able to support my family. I'm also new to Tumblr and still learning how to reach the people who could help me share my story. 🙏🇵🇸❤️
My name is Tamer Foad, and I’m a 34-year-old father of three beautiful children—Mira (6 years old), Aya (4 years old), and Tameem, who is just one month old. I used to be a GIS engineer, and like any father, I dreamed of providing a warm and secure life for my family. I was also a bodybuilder, once weighing 100 kg. But on October 7, 2023, our lives were forever changed as the war in Gaza erupted, shattering the peace we once knew.
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We were forced to flee our home in Gaza City, leaving behind everything we had ever known as the city turned into a battlefield. With nowhere else to go, we ended up in a tent within a crowded refugee camp. Day by day, our situation grew more desperate. As the conflict dragged on, the only crossing border in Gaza was closed, cutting off vital supplies and making life unbearable.
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Food prices have skyrocketed, increasing by 600% to 1000%, making basic necessities feel as unattainable as luxury items in New York City. Over the past nine months, I’ve used up every bit of savings I had to keep my family alive. But now, I’m at a breaking point. I can no longer afford to buy food or milk for my newborn son, Tameem. My weight has dropped drastically, from 100 kg to just 71 kg, as we struggle to find enough to eat.
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Even water has become a precious commodity. The price of unfiltered water is now $2 for every 10 liters, further adding to our daily challenges.
It is with a heart full of pain and humility that I am launching this campaign. I never imagined I would be in a position where I would need to ask for help in this way, but the reality is that my children’s lives are at stake. The starvation that is gripping our city has already claimed too many lives, and I am terrified that my family could be next.
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In the name of humanity and fatherhood, I am imploring you to support my family during this unimaginable crisis. I will be withdrawing any donations every two weeks to immediately buy food and necessities, as we cannot wait for the campaign to reach its goal.
Thank you from the depths of my heart.
@fancysmudges @brokenbackmountain @just-browsing1222 @mothblossoms @aleciosun @serica @fluoresensitive @katherineonline @khizuo @lesbiandardevil @transmutationisms @schoolhater @timogsilangan @appsa @buttercuparry @sayruq @malcriada @palestinegenocide @orbleglorb @sar-soor @akajustmerry @annoyingloudmicrowavecultist @feluka @marnota @tortiefrancis @flower-tea-fairies @tsaricides @riding-with-the-wild-hunt @visenyasdragons @belleandsaintsebastian @ear-motif @kordeliiius @brutaliakhoa @raelyn-dreams @troythecatfish @theropoda @tamamita @4ft10tvlandfangirl @queerstudiesnatural @northgazaupdates2 @skatezophrenic @awetistic-things @baby-girl-aaron-dessner @nabulsi
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afterglowsainz · 3 months
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blowing smoke | max verstappen
summary: you broke up with max a few months ago but that doesn’t prevent you from feeling upset about his new relationship
fc: gracie abrams
a/n: max won the spanish gp and gracie released her album in the same week so ofc that meant i had to make a fic about max inspired by gracie’s album and use her as a faceclaim again ofc ofc
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liked by charles_leclerc, redbullracing and others
maxverstappen1 nice winter ❄️
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username uhm … sir … that’s not yn ???
username well they did broke up like 2 months ago sooo
username still a bit early, no?
username we love a padel king 🙌🏽
username RARE SHIRTLESS MAX
username the second pic … no need to make me feel single like that
username who’s the new gf tho? 👀
username oh so my parents are over over okay i see 😔
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liked by francisca.cgomes, alexandrasaintmleux and others
yourusername back at my second home 🎧
tagged aarondessner
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username MOTHER IS BACK
username new music from yn the earth is healing !!!
alexandrasaintmleux la plus jolie💗
yourusername that would be you🫵🏽
username this breakup album is gonna be heart wrenching isn’t it 😔
username if aaron is participating i just KNOW is gonna be painful
username no i’m already preparing myself mentally to drown in my own tears
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liked by f1wags and others
f1gossip max verstappen and his new girlfriend during the winter break
tagged maxverstappen1 and gfusername
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username why does he look bored with her
username cause he is
username ??? you don’t know them, leave them alone
username guys this is not funny i miss yn 😔
username her style is so good!
username i don’t like herrrr she gives me bad vibes
username fortunately you’re not the one who has to like her
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liked by maxverstappen1, iamrebeccad and others
gfusername my valentine💘
tagged maxverstappen1
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username oh!
username first pic 🥰🥰
username last pic 😍😍
username that should be me!!!
username okay yeah she’s pretty
username they look so good together🥰
username someone check my girl yn’s pulse!!
username honestly i would k word myself if i lost THE max verstappen
username nahhh yn > max
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liked by landonorris, oliviarodrigo and others
yourusername back to my ways like 2019
tagged sabrinacarpenter
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username ohhh she saw the post
username girl no!!! come back to 2024!!!
raye ohhh yes! 🍸
username omg 2019 yn you will always be famous ‼️
username okay but escapism is definitely her song
alexandrasaintmleux 🥰
username alex doesn’t approve i see
username guys i don’t know but partying and getting wasted every night like she was doing before meeting max doesn’t seem like the healthiest coping mechanism
username maybe she just wants to have fun now that she’s single 🤷🏽‍♀️ we can’t judge
username exactly! let her live
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liked by gfusername, danielricciardo and others
maxverstappen1 great to be back! let’s go for more victories 🏆
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username to another year of hearing the dutch anthem every sunday
redbullracing for more career wins this year 🦁
username bro really posted a thirst trap for his first race win of the year
username no because the sun hitting his face like that ??? can’t complain
username lovely win 😮‍💨
username sooo babygirl
username he really is for the girlies!
gfusername 💗💗💗
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liked by f1wags and others
f1gossip max verstappen at the after party of the saudi arabian grand prix seen without his girlfriend despite her attending the race
tagged maxverstappen1
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username max with a backwards cap is gonna be the end of me
username only man with a basic wardrobe that can look that hot
username 🥵 🥵 🥵
username WHY IS NO ONE TALKING ABOUT THE CAPTION
username without … the girlfriend … despite her being at the race …
username you’re reading too much into it
username let us be delusional in peace
username good for him!
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liked by gfusername, sabrinacarpenter and others
yourusername now you know what we’ve been doing …. “Blowing Smoke” is out now! ⭐️
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username my girlfriend is releasing music again !!!
username song of the summer frrrr
username im obsessed with it 😍
lilymhe certified pop banger🤘🏽
yourusername a hole in one if i may 👀
username “if she’s got a pulse she meets your standards now” damn…
username she didn’t go to the studio to play
username “you couldn’t point her out in any crowd”
username “tell me if she takes you far enough away from all the baggage you've been carrying”
username “you feel nothing and yet you still let her”
username she wrote so many unhinged lyrics it’s insane‼️
alexandrasaintmleux favorite song ever 💞
yourusername you say that about all of them 🙄
alexandrasaintmleux they’re all amazing!
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liked by alexandrasaintmleux, taylorswift and others
yourusername miss going on tour so much we’re doing it again! buy your tickets, bring your friends, we’re gonna have a rocking summer! 🎸✨
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username omg i’m hearing blowing smoke live 😭😭
username FINALLY
username she keeps feeding us and feeding us
username guys i just saw the dates and she performs on miami the same weekend of the grand prix …
username i noticed the same! is the only date that coincides with a grand prix
username could it be …. never mind
username no because even if none of the guys are thinking of going i just know the wags are dragging them
username you just made my entire year😩
francisca.cgomes and we’ll be going 😮‍💨
yourusername 💙💙💙
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liked by schecoperez, alex_albon and others
maxverstappen1 lovely miami 🇺🇸
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username none of things i’m thinking of are in the bible
username TU-TU-TU-DU
username men should not be this hot
username pretending i didn’t see the last pic 😁
username he needs to post a warning next time
username let it gooo touch some grass
username SO DID HE WENT TO THE CONCERT OR NOT
username one of the girlies who went let us know!!!
username well the whole grid was there so i can only assume he was too 😭
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liked by maxverstappen1, oscarpiastri and others
yourusername miami you are (as always) the loml
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username BEST NIGHT EVER
username you’re surreal and that was the best concert i’ve ever been to 💗
alexandrasaintmleux the most talented ever! 💘
yourusername 💞💞💞
username GRAMMY WHEN
username i may never recover from this night
username max lurching in the likes 👀
username oh he was definitely there
lilymhe screaming crying never getting over it !!!
yourusername obsessed with you screaming all the songs to my face 😭
alex_albon at least she wasn’t right by your side leaving you deaf ❌
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liked by f1gossip, lailahasanovic and others
f1wags last pictures of max verstappen seen with his girlfriend arguing outside their hotel during the miami grand prix weekend two weeks ago. they haven’t been seen together ever since and they stopped following each other from social media
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username guys don’t get me excited 😩
username omg ??? are we out of the trenches ???
username not them breaking up after yn’s concert 😭
username ngl i don’t hate this
username does this mean yn and max have a chance of getting back together ???
username pls i need that to happen
username guys can you blame him??? he listened to blowing smoke!!!
username and mess it up, and i miss you i’m sorry, and feels like, and
username my divorced parents are getting back together i’m calling it
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liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc and others
maxverstappen1 having a rocking summer🎸✨
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username EXCUSE ME
username not the caption‼️
username THE HARD LAUNCHING?
username how much do we wanna bet that yn gave him that drawing and he was waiting to post it
username THE LAST PIC???😭
username they’re the cutest
yourusername max! i thought we said we would soft launch
maxverstappen1 oops🤭
username we manifested too hard to the sun
username i just know he couldn’t wait to get back with yn
alexandrasaintmleux she’s everything 😍😍
yourusername you’re the loml you know that
maxverstappen1 uhmmm 🤨
charles_leclerc back off 🤺🤺🤺 yourusername
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jujusjunk · 2 months
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You know what’s really fucked up
I’ve been standing up for Palestine for years now, literal years, for fucks sake I am a Palestinian, I center Palestinians. And just because I come to a different conclusion than the majority, or I find out about something that was actually really hard for me to come to terms but is true, I have gotten over 30 death threat anons in the last 3 hours, cursing me for:
1. Humanizing Israelis
2. Humanizing Jews
3. Having a conversation with a Jew (that was months ago yet somehow it’s news now)
4. That Jew being Israeli
5. Having a convo with a different Jew
6. That Jew not being Israeli (they actually got mad that a talked to a non Israeli Jew)
7. Calling myself a Palestinian (even though I am one…)
8. Wanting peace
9. Not encouraging the Hezbollah-Israel war BECAUSE I DONT WANT MORE DEATH (and I’m in Lebanon and I swear I’m gonna pass out if I hear about another bomb)
10. Existing
11. Not wanting death in both sides (it’s ok if I don’t want death on the Palestinian but the second I also don’t want death in the Israeli side suddenly I’m a mastermind spy that’s been working against Palestinians since day 1)
I would like to remind everyone:
IM A PALESTINIAN. Just because I’ve had conversations with Israelis, just because I view them as humans deserving of life, just because I genuinely see no problem living side by side with them, just because I don’t want to kill them all.
DOESNT MEAN I SUPPORT WHAT ISRAEL (the government BY THE WAY) DOES. I can criticize a country without actively wanting to mass murder its people, without actively wanting to make their individual lives hell for being born into said country (which they can’t control JUST LIKE I CANT CONTROL BEING BORN INTO A PALESTINIAN FAMILY WITH FAMILY IN GAZA)
For fucks sake please, I beg, leave me alone, please.
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chestersturniolo · 3 months
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Priority
Matt Sturniolo x fem!reader
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Summary; Once again you find yourself in an argument with your boyfriend matt, due to his often absence. but this time you decide to tell him how you truly feel.
Warnings; swearing,angst,fluff,use of pet names and y/n. maybe slightly suggestive. I thinkkkk that’s all :)))
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Matt and I have known eachother for pretty much our whole lives. I’ve been best friends with him for as long as I can remember, and we have been in a relationship for almost 2 years now. 
It’s the weekend, and me and Matt are finally spending some quality time together. I say finally because it has become a very rare occurrence. It wasn’t so bad when we first started dating, but the more popularity he and his brothers gained, the less time I got to spend with him. And truthfully it had been taking a toll on me, and our relationship as a whole. 
We are currently laid on his bed, Matt is on his back, slightly propped against the headboard , whilst I’m curled into him,laying on my side,one leg spawled over both of his, and my head laying on his chest. His arm wrapped around my back pulling me in,impossibly close. We agreed on having a lazy day today, which I suggested. Because our time together had been so limited lately , I really just wanted to be alone-alone with him. Taking him in as much as I could. 
I’m so at peace right now, my head gently rising and falling along with his chest whilst he takes gentle breathes. The soft sound of his heartbeat.  I slowly start to drift off. Matt must have noticed my grip around him loosening slightly , as I feel his hand trail up my back and in my hair, laying gentle strokes. I glance up to see a soft grin on his face, 
“Sleepy baby?” He coos. Now taking a piece of my hair and twirling it, the sound of his rings lightly clinking together.
“Yeaa” I smile sleepily, laying my head back down on his chest. “I just feel so content right now, we haven’t spent a lot of time together recently… ya know?” 
Matt let’s out a soft sigh “I know sweetheart,I know” he says, hand still entwined in my hair, laying a kiss on the top of my head. “But we have all weekend together, just you and me okay?” A couple of beats of silence falls between us ,before Matt gently starts shifting further up the headboard. I sit up with him,propping myself up with my arm next to him.
“Okay?” Matt repeats, his hand reaching out and holding my jaw, thumb grazing my cheek. I melt into his hand. 
“Okay.” I smile lightly. He pulls me towards him, placing a gentle kiss on the tip of my nose, and another on my lips. He slowly moved down to my neck,littering kisses all over it. My eyes flutter shut, taking in the feeling as I cup my hand around the back of his neck.
 
But my eyes are quick to open, when there’s loud pounding on Matts door, making us jump apart slightly. I turn to look at the door,
“Matt! get your ass out here, we needa film this podcast ep” I hear Chris shout through the door, his footsteps fading back down the hallway. 
My head snaps back towards Matt. He is fully sat up, eyes widened. 
“Fuck” he mumbles.
“Tell me you’re joking” i huff, sitting up.
A familiar pit forms quickly in my stomach. This isn’t the first time that our time together has been cut short.And i know it definitely will not be the last. 
“I completely forgot we haven’t filmed for the pod- I’m so sorry, fuck!”
I take a deep disappointed breath..
All of the times that his work has come before me start raiding my mind, and my disappointment and upset quickly turn into anger. 
“Matt,sorry won’t cut it forever. How many times has this happened? How many?” 
my voice slightly raising. I see Matt get slightly taken aback by my tone. 
He lets out a breath “I know okay, but you know our posting schedule-“ 
I cut him off 
“Well clearly you don’t! What happened to “we have all weekend together just you and me”  Huh?…Matt we hardly spend any time together anymore”
Matt shifts his legs to the floor, now sitting on the edge of the bed, and runs a hand through his hair with a huff. 
A small silence lingers whilst I wait for his response. 
“I said I’m sorry!-” He starts, his building frustration clear in his tone.
“-And I know okay, we have this same exact conversation every time I have to film!- but it’s my fucking job y/n!” he strains. 
My anger builds, once again hearing the same excuse I’m given every time. By now I would usually just give up and storm away to sulk. But this time I decide to let my feelings out properly. I’m tired of this. The same back and forth rut we’ve been stuck in. The familiar feeling of being pushed to the side. 
“Matt, I can’t remember the last time we even spent a full day together, just us!” My voice risen. 
“When you’re not filming, you’re with your brothers talking about what to film! When we’re apart you don’t call, and your texts are dismissive. I feel like I’m putting in all the effort here and I-“
“MATT BRO!” 
I’m cut off by Chris banging on the door once again.
I let out a defeated sigh, and bury my face in my hands. 
I feel the bed shift, I glance up to see Matt now stood infront of me, a frustrated expression plastered on his face.
“Look, I have to go and film this episode. I’ll only be gone for about an hour. I’ll come straight back and we can figure this out then okay.” He states,emotionless. 
Once again I’m brushed aside. “whatever Matt” I speak barely above a whisper, but my attitude still prominent.
Matt let’s out a huff and runs his hand through his hair. I let my gaze fall to my lap, as I hear him turn and leave the room. The slight slam of his bedroom door making me squeeze my eyes shut. 
I sigh, laying myself down and staring at the ceiling. A familiar lump starts to form in my throat, tears of frustration and upset now starting to pool in my eyes. 
Our interaction starts to replay in my head,
I really want to work through this with him, I love him a lot, and all I wanted him to do was hear me out. And he left. As usual.
I decide to try and take a nap to fill the void of Matts absence. 
After tossing and turning for what feels like an eternity, I pull out my phone. After a while of mindlessly scrolling , I pull myself off the bed and take myself to the kitchen to grab a soda. On my way to the fridge ,my ears prick at he sound of mumbled echos coming from the stairs. I stop in my tracks. I can’t help myself, as I tiptoe over to the bottom of the stairs. I turn my head to try and hear the boys. A small silence falls, and I shake my head at myself. Eavesdropping? Really? I turn around to start making my way back to the kitchen, until the mention of my name snaps my body back round to its previous position. Eavesdropping it is. 
My heart rate quickens as I hear Matts faint voice. “It’s too much, it’s fucking ridiculous bro”
The distance between us making it hard make out the conversation, picking up mumbled statements from Matt- 
“I need a break” 
“I can’t deal with it anymore”
“I’m done” 
My breath hitches. Tears finding their way back to my eyes as my heart drops. He’s leaving me? I’ve stuck by his side through all of this. After everything we’ve been through he’s…leaving me???
I’m snapped out of my daze
“y/n?” I hear Matt softly call from the top of the stairs, traces of worry evident in his voice. 
My eyes flit up to meet Matts gaze. Tears now streaming down my face. 
Matts eyes widen slightly , “shit” he says under his breath. 
I quickly turn around and head to the stairs down to the front door. I can’t see his face right now, I need to get out. 
I hear Matts quick and heavy footsteps down the stairs, following behind me. 
“Y/N!” 
I don’t stop, I reach the front door and swing it open, running out into the rain. 
“Y/N, wait, please!!!” 
It doesn’t take long before Matt catches up to me ,grabbing my wrist firmly, stopping me in my tracks. 
I keep my gaze on the street ahead.
“Stop okay! talk to me, tell me what’s going on!?” he pleads breathlessly. His voice laced with panic. Silence falls between us, only the sounds of the rain hitting the ground around us.
Matt loosens his grip on my wrist. 
“hey,look at me” his tone now soft. Taking his free, ring clad hand to my chin, gently guiding my gaze to meet his. I stiffen at his touch, but I let my eyes examine his features. His now wet hair slightly falling over his eyes that are frantically searching my face for answers.
I pull away from his grip slowly, taking a step backwards. 
“W-we’re…over…” i utter, tears still streaming down my cheeks, the rainfall disguising them. 
I watch as Matts face falls. Eyebrows knitting together slightly.
“what?” he replies, voice barely audible. Chest starting to rise and fall faster.
“I-“ I start , before burying my face in my hands in an attempt to calm myself down. I take a few hitched breaths before slowly lifting my head to see Matts fingers once again raking through his sopping hair. his eyes are glossy, like he’s close to crying. I feel the pain in my heart deepen seeing his desperate,pleading expression. But swiftly remember why it’s plastered there in the first place. 
Taking another deep breath I tried again “I-I heard you upstairs talking to nick and chris”
Matts eyebrows furrow deeper , a puzzled expression now evident, but this quickly turns into an eyes widened look of realisation as things piece together in his mind. 
“y/n-“ he tried before I cut him off.
“You said you were done with me. That I’m too much. That I’m fucking ridiculous!” I recite his earlier statements back to him through soft sobs.
“I’m sorry I was harsh earlier,but I’m trying here Matt! I wanted to work through this but you’re obviously done with m-“ 
“y/n no baby no! listen,okay!” Matt pleads as he takes a step closer to me cupping my face with both hands. 
“you mean everything to me. I listened to what you said earlier, and you’re not wrong. I haven’t been a good boyfriend recently to say the least and I’m sorry for that-“ 
He pauses , grazing his thumb across my cheek.
“Our filming schedule has been way too intense, it’s been consuming me, I know. what you heard was me convincing Nick and Chris that it is fucking ridiculous , that it’s too much  and that I’m done with it-“ he rambles, now reciting his own words back to me again. In a completely different context. 
My jaw drops slightly as I listen. Matts hands now finding their way to my hips. 
“turns out Nick and Chris feel the same…we agreed on completely stopping the podcast, aswel as cutting back on Wednesday videos. y/n, sweetheart, YOU are my priority,I’ve let this come between us for way too long. No more…”
An unexplainable wave of relief washes over me as I take in his words. How could I have gotten it so twisted? 
“M-matt I’m so sorry I thou-“ I cut myself off, bringing a hand up to hold my face. 
“hey it’s okay,don’t be sorry” Matt assures, his voice light and comforting, as he peels my hand from my face.
“I can see how you would take it the way you did, but trust me when I say I would never do that. I won’t let you go , I love you too much” he says with a small smile on his lips, pulling me closer, our bodies now flush. 
I wrap my arms around his neck, still slightly processing what just happened. 
“I love you too” I whisper , a smile of my own now forming. Matt leans down, placing a soft ,long kiss on my lips. I turn my head slightly to deepen it, standing on my tippy toes. 
The rain still crashing down on us as the kiss became even more intense and passionate. It felt like we were in a movie scene. 
I feel Matts hands snake further around my waist, lifting me off of the ground. I break the kiss with a squeal as he spins us around , my legs instinctively wrapping around his waist.
He lets out a soft chuckle 
“Come on baby,let’s get out of the rain hm?” 
I nod with a soft smile, as he sets off back to the house, still carrying me. I let my head fall into the crook of his neck. 
“How does a bath and movie night sound sweetheart? I’m all yours” he offers as he squeezes me close.
“it sounds perfect”
—————————————————————————
the death of cut the cameras
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A/N - ahhh okay guys that was my first time ever writing something and I’m not sure how I feel🫣 lmk what you think! If you have any requests/Qs my anon ask is on ✨
- 𝑺𝒂𝒈𝒆 ♡
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rebirthgarments · 6 months
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TW: Chemical w-rfare, Ab-rtion
Urgent Ask to evacuate Nara, a 🍉 disabled woman with MS who also has pancreatic cancer due to chemical w-rfare.
Support by financially contributing to her @FedUp4Palestine vetted funhnd-raizer (that I personally vetted): givebutter.com/NaraMedicalAid
+ resharing/ reposting this post!
I, Sky Cubacub- a Fed up 4 Palestine team member, have been in direct contact with Nara to get to know her and her story more over the past few days. We have become fast friends due to so many overlapping symptoms of our disabilities. Nara’s story caught my eye because I have post-viral ME/CFS which many times is a precursor to MS. I really want my disability community to show up for her to get this campaign funded that is so close to my heart so that she can continue medical treatment.
We have chatted extensively! During our chats, I found out from Nara that she had not previously had health issues until she was exposed in the white phosphorus attack in 2008. The long lasting damage and effects of phosphorus continue to compound and become more and more disabling to this day, even after 16 years.
Here is her story in her own words (edited for clarity):
“Hi I'm Nara,
I'm a cancer and multiple sclerosis patient. I need treatment, examinations, and follow-up on a regular basis, but the hospitals in which I used to follow up were bombed and the other one was turned into military barracks. All I need now is to leave Gaza for treatment, preserve my life, and live with my family in peace.
We're a family of 4, including my 12 and 7 year old children.
I had been diagnosed with a tumor in the pancreas as a result of inhaling phosphorus in a previous war. A couple years after being exposed to phosphorus, I became pregnant, and the fetus was pressing on the tumor, which drew the doctor’s attention to the cancer. My fetus was emergency aborted, and the spleen, 80% of the pancreas, and part of the small intestine were removed. I complained every now and then of a lot of pain as a result of the removal of part of the pancreas. I was having follow up care in the Turkish Friendship Hospital for hematology and tumors. But since the beginning of October, I have not been able to follow up because the hospital has turned into a military barracks.
The remaining part is talking about multiple sclerosis:
In 2018, I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. I had many complications, such as inflammation of the seventh nerve in the eye, the inability to walk with balance, movement with difficulty, and many symptoms. I was then required to take 12 injections every month and many medications and vitamins. I was following up at the Nasser Medical Complex in Khan Yunis, but unfortunately the hospital was out of service due to the war. So for a long time I have not received any injections. MS is truly difficult and it controls my life completely, and the attacks occur in many and varied ways.”
A note about her breathing apparatus:
Because people in displacement have to wait in long queues and pay to use the bathroom, Nara had started to restrict her water intake because of a UTI she never has been able to heal from. This has created a problem with raised levels of potassium, so doctors have placed her on oxygen for fear of the potassium affecting her heart.
Goals
she needs at least $15,000 to evacuate
2 adults at $5,000 each
2 children at $2,500 each
this price is subject to increase due to the cost of registration for evacuation continuing to go up
The other money will go to the cost of treatment and living costs.
Nara chooses to stay anonymous because she has had to mask her disabilities so much that only her family knows about her MS and Cancer, so we have not linked her instagram, but we are in direct contact with her and can verify that she is who she says she is! Because of this, she cannot promote her own fundraiser, so it is our job to collectively do it for her!
[Image Description: a digital illustration by @k8deciccio of Nara, a Pal-eh-stienian woman wearing a black hijab/outfit with purple highlights. She has a breathing apparatus that is bulbous that goes in her nose. Text Reads: Help Narawith Cancer and MS Treatment, She Must Evacuate with her family of 4. $30k goal givebutter.com/NaraMedicalAid . There is a QR code in the bottom right corner that goes to her support link. The @FedUp4Palestine logo is in the top left corner.]
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theealbatross · 24 days
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fight the alchemy (s.s)
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Plot | After a tumultuous year, Sebastian’s life was finally okay – passable, up-to-scratch, satisfactory. And he had just almost reached peace – when his brilliant, painfully observant, carelessly crude genius of a friend, Garreth Weasley, started pointing out unnecessary facts that could rip all that harmony to shreds.
or, Garreth asks why Sebastian isn’t dating you. Sebastian spirals.
Tags | fluff, sebastian is a thought daughter, low self esteem, seb is a playboy BUT NOT REALLY, horny thots but we keep it pg, insecurity so deep you try to fight cupid, cupid fights back
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An Ashwinder’s wand to his neck and Sebastian could honestly and truly say that he was … alright.
Life wasn’t perfect, by any means. His uncle was murdered dead, an estranged twin sister in Paris who refuses to answer his letters, a mistrustful Ominis that breathes on his neck, and a tattered companionship that was barely hanging on by a thread.
But he was okay.
Thankfully, Solomon was still dead, Anne was still alive, and still cranky Ominis is now open to reconciliation. Plus, if all else had fallen, he at least managed to save your cherished friendship thanks to your forgiving nature.
Thus, as thanks to the people who had not yet given up on him, he had sworn to live the rest of his academic life as a meek, unassuming, law-abiding student of Hogwarts.
And he did such a good job at it.
The professors are now impressed at his steadily increasing grades (so much so that the Ravenclaws are now finally seeing him as a threat again) and he even managed to make Imelda’s team as her beater to keep him occupied.
The latter, however, had a grating consequence – he had become popular.
It was thrilling, at first, he went on dates to make up for the years he had lost, kissed the pretty girls because it felt like he should (as one of the few bastards lucky enough to live every raging teenager’s dream), and accepted the slaps on the face politely when they inevitably broke up.
But now he’s just gotten tired and bored of it all.
Ominis says it’s a genius’ folly, to always find a fault in something and then drop it when it doesn’t quite meet his standard of perfect. Leander says he’s just a bastard.
He cups his face with his hand, wincing. Her fucking ring caught on his skin and he can’t be arsed to suffer through the bitterness of a Wiggenweld Potion for a mere scratch.
Garreth doesn’t bother to swallow his bread before saying, “Really, mate? I thought you liked this one?”
“Liked her rack, more likely,” Andrew quipped from his seat on the stone steps of the boathouse.
Sebastian threw his scarf on his face, satisfied at his squawk.
“No talking about my ex-girlfriends,” he warned. It was one of his few rules when it came to his male friends. He may be a bastard but as someone with a sister and a couple of good female friendships, he makes it a point to never become one of those losers who talk badly about women they have a history with. Just so he can have a moral high ground when he beats up anyone who might do it to his friends.
“All right, all right,” Andrew raised his hands in playful surrender, throwing Sebastian’s scarf back to him. “But as your friend, I think it’s about time you stop swapping out girls every time you get bored of them.”
“I don’t swap them out,” he rolls his eyes. “Breakups are normal.”
“Breakups are normal,” Garreth points out. “Six breakups in 2 years is an issue.”
“Maybe I’m just meant for the bachelor life,” he mumbles, ignoring the pointed accusation from Garreth. Fucking perceptive prick. “Not everyone gets to meet their soulmate in Hogwarts, asshole.”
Garreth grins, “Natty’s great, isn’t she?”
Sebastian and Andrew both throw their scarves at him, the three of them bursting out in laughter and boos.
“To the Three Broomsticks, then?” Andrew stood up, patting his pants.
As 7th years it was nearly impossible to take a breather with the looming threat of exams that will dictate the rest of your life and the inescapable trap of adulthood that awaits them in a couple of months. So, his friends had made it a point to at least go out once every week whenever they could, really take advantage of their last year as students where they had no other responsibility but to survive the week.
In a year’s time, seeing each other as often as they do will be nothing short of a miracle.
“Leander and Everett are already there, saved up a table since it’s a Friday, it’s gonna be packed full,” Andrew explains.
Sebastian looks around, eyes scanning the castle in the setting sun. “You go on ahead I’m waiting for –”
“Sebastian!”
A flash of movement appeared rushing down the stairs towards the boathouse, your face beaming as you waved to the three of them. When you were a foot away from him you jumped into his arms, shrieking energetically when he grabbed your waist and lifted you above his head.
“Sorry, I’m late,” you pant, smiling at your friends once you’re back on the ground. “Professor Hecate asked me to stay back for a minute, something about revisions on my research.”
“I can’t believe you got permission to research in The Restricted Section after the crazy nonsense you pulled in 5th year,” Garreth shook his head. Sebastian wrapped an arm around your shoulders, pulling you closer to his side, beaming in pride. Nobody knows but the two of you that the very thing you were researching were the technicalities of how you broke Anne’s curse so it could be taught to the nurses in St. Mungos and hopefully spread to the rest of wizardkind.
“It’s exactly because I had the nerve to break the rules that I was given the honorable opportunity,” you dramatically curtsied. “And they said Gryffindors were the brave ones.”
That made Sebastian laugh. Garreth blinks, eyes squinting at him for a second but he doesn’t look offended, more … focused on Sebastian.
“Alright, no more of that House Rivalry. Quidditch Season is over,” Andrew quips.
“Wiped your asses there too, Larson,” he quipped, Andrew’s jaw drops, looking at Garreth for help and receiving none. He was still staring at Sebastian, eyes shifting between him and you.
Andrew groans. “Slytherins are assholes.”
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Slytherins are, apparently, also light-weights.
Well, at least one of them is.
He adjusts his hold on your body as the other hand wraps his coat around your body properly. After your last ‘improved’ butterbeer you had slumped into his lap, rudely snoozing off on the crook of his neck and refusing to wake up even when it was time for your group to leave – not that he would’ve allowed that to happen, with your demanding research it was a miracle to get you to sleep let alone let loose.
The rest of the group had gone in first to scope the scenery and bribe the patrolling Head students with leftover chips while he and Garreth were stuck carrying you and an unconscious Amit that they had managed to catch last-minute in Hogsmeade. Poor bastard.
“I was thinking –”
“Please don’t,” he groans.
“Why have you two never dated?”
Sebastian stops his fussing, barely able to use his head to ensure he keeps walking, and continue to Act Normal, now using both of his hands to hold you tighter.
“You’re drunk,” he deflects. The puffs of your breath warm his entire body.
“Because! When I think about it …”
Please, for the love of the great Merlin stop thinking.
“You’ve been inseparable from the start! I can’t believe it’s escaped my notice you’ve never dated. You say your past relationships got boring and got annoying but you’ve never been bored and annoyed with her and you’ve been friends for years!”
Bored with you? He’s had more near-fatal heart attacks because of you than breakups. Sebastian barely had the time to be bored. And sometimes you do get at each other’s throats but it was always fixed after a proper conversation. If his killing his uncle couldn’t turn you away then he doubts anything you do could ever turn him away.
“Plus, with all the respect and love to my beautiful darling Natty, she’s a fucking catch, mate!”
If Garreth wasn’t carrying a sinless half-dead Amit, Sebastian would’ve punched him in his mouth just to stop him from talking.
“I’m just saying,” Garreth walks ahead of him, clearly aware of the fuse he had just lit. Sebastian was tempted to kick the back of his knees just for the satisfaction of seeing him fall.  “Maybe you can join the club and find your soulmate in Hogwarts.”
Garreth winks.
“We’re still accepting members.”
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He’s decided.
He needs to kill Garreth.
He has not been able to sleep properly for the past week and it’s all because of that ginger prick and his needless remarks.
“Why have you two never dated?”
Sebastian’s pencil cracks in his hand.
“Is he alright?” he hears an underclassman whisper on the other table. He glances at them and they flinch. Quickly, he softens his expression ("You really need to stop scowling at people, Sebastian."), unaware he had glared at them and sent a wary smile in apology. It would just be unfair to aim his ire at innocent people when he could just use it to rip out every strand of Weasley’s hair.
“He’s been staring at that page for an hour. Maybe we should call –”
He stands up, escaping.
Sebastian never realized just how much he spent his time with you until people were looking at him funny when he was walking or sitting alone in public places. At first, he thought there had been crumbs on his face or one of his asshole friends stuck a note on his back like a kid. Plus, he hadn’t been feeling his best since that night but he thought it had been the lack of sleep.
It wasn’t until he had met Imelda on the grounds that he found his answer:
“Where’s the rest of you?”
He blinked at his captain, “I’m sorry?”
She shook her head. “Man, it feels weird seeing you alone. Did you guys have a fight? You’re usually shadowing her like a puppy after class.”
Then everything clicks, the strange looks, the feeling of missing something (like a forgotten important homework after he had reached the top of the Astronomy Tower) – it’s been a side effect of avoiding you.
Okay, it’s not that he’s avoiding you per se. He just needs space. He needs to think and he finds that can’t do that once he feels your eyes on him. With his luck, you’re going to see right through him and that would just be unideal if not a fucking catastrophe.
That’s why he’s taken it upon himself to stay off your way until he puts his thoughts in a row and finally screws his head on straight again. Or he could just kill Garreth, get sent straight to Azakaban, and avoid confronting these complicated thoughts altogether.
“I can’t believe it’s escaped my notice you’ve never dated!”
He sits on a bench, hands on his head as he let out a prolonged groan, “The fucking bastard.”
Why did he have to point it out? Why did Garreth have to bring what he, upon reflection, had buried on the back of his head, just waiting for that one little flick of acknowledgment before it blew his brains out.
Because Sebastian is a lot of things but he’s not a fucking moron.
It’s not that the thought of being together is unpleasant. If he lets himself consider it his chest feels like it would escape his ribcage both in excitement and utter terror.
But Garreth was right: he’d never thought about it before – hadn’t thought the idea was conceivable in this reality.
He has a feeling it was his way of preserving whatever pure relationship he had left. He’s not exactly rich with true companionship and he’s not idiotic enough to risk it all over a bloody crush. 
And not just any crush – his best friend, the person who saved his life and then helped him rebuild it when he was finished smashing it to pieces. The one who never turned her back even when his blood had given up. The girl who has a line of eligible bachelors following her on their knees for a single chance, ones who could offer her more than he ever could – ones who could offer her the world.
So, yeah – forgive him, but he’s never really allowed himself to entertain the idea of them dating. Sebastian has tested his luck enough.
Unless the roles switch and he gets to save the wizarding world this time then maybe … yeah, maybe -- maybe in another fucking life.
The thought makes him stand up, walking straight out of the campus to hopefully drown the sorrows of the depressing state of his love life with the best fire whiskey Hogshead could offer. How does he even move on from this? How does he make peace with the fact that he has sealed his fate of living the rest of his life alone? 
It’s impossible, he’s decided. Even if he graduates at the top of the classes he is taking and gets accepted into the Auror Programme that Sharp had recommended him for, their social standing is still heavens apart. He’s an orphan, with a husk of an extended family and no money to his name.
It wouldn’t matter to you, never really cared for pure bloodlines or lineages and he knows anyone who brings that up when they’re courting you will receive the most disgusted look on your face. 
But he cares – you are the most special person in his life. He wants the best for you. And the best is not something he can provide.
His depressing thoughts halt as his steps falter, a familiar scent tickling his nose. A familiar scent that leads straight into the Forbidden Forest. When he looks up to the sky, he realizes the sun has almost finished setting.
She can’t be that reckless, right?
He was barely surprised when he chanted the incantation that triggered the charm they had both put in their necklaces, the sparkling thread leads straight into the forest. And if he knows you half as well as he thinks he does then he knows exactly where it’s gonna lead to.
There goes his late-night plan.
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It isn’t exactly his first jaunt in the forbidden space but it still gives him the creeps especially so close to the night. Why you’re so fond of the place is something he’ll never understand.
But that’s just the way you were, just another part of your quirks that makes you so endearing.
How you throw your head back when you laugh, that you get so cranky when you’re studying that no one dares to approach you but him, even the way you messily eat your favorite chocolate pastry of the week yet never fail to share a piece with him.
With this new revelation, he bitterly accepts the reason for his philandering ways. That he simply is another prick who is coping with not being able to attain the love of his life at the expense of those poor girls.
His self-condemnation however was cut short when he heard the waterfall, not being able to help the smirk on his face when he turned the corner and found you just as he had expected: in the middle of the clear, dark, water, floating carelessly on your back.
Gods, you are a beauty. He’s always thought so, the entire male population in Hogwarts thought so too. If they somehow get to break through your walls and manage to get to know you, he might just have to beat them away with an actual stick.
“Sebastian,” you smile, his heart stops. “I knew you’d find me.”
You swim to him gracefully, barely disturbing the water with only your eyes above the water but there was no hiding the grin in your face. Like a pitiful sailor seduced by a siren, his feet dragged him to the edge, a short ledge above from where you were looking up at him.
“You left your scent on purpose,” he states, kneeling to get a closer look at you. What a beauty – mischievous, cunning, irresistible. He’s never loved anyone more. “Naughty, naughty, darling.”
She pulls herself up the ledge, their faces inches away from each other. He nails his eyes to yours so they wouldn’t be tempted to look down at your soaking figure cloaked only by a thin chemise “I had to get you somehow, knew you couldn’t resist a damsel in distress.”
“Funny,” he softly glares, chuckling when she preens, clearly satisfied that her plan worked perfectly. “With all the water in the Black Lake, you had to pick the Forbidden Forest to swim in.”
You dip yourself back down in the water, swimming away but still facing him. “Come, Sebastian. I’ve been bored all week since you’ve been avoiding me.”
Guilt runs through his spine at the sudden coldness in your offhanded comment. Clearly, his absence hasn’t escaped your notice as he had hoped.
Like a scolded pup, he follows your command to a T. Eyes never leaving your floating figure as he removed his coat, folding it neatly along with the rest of his clothes until he was left in his underclothes.
He winces at the touch of the freezing water. A heating charm would do wonders but the way your unsympathetic eyes never left his figure gave him a feeling that this was a punishment he was meant to endure.
He steels himself, diving into the water and only resurfacing when he is right in front of you. “You called?”
“You’re so fucking full of yourself,” you splash the cold water at him, shrieking when he reaches out for your arms and barely managing to slip away.
He dives again, grinning at your confused flounder, until you realize your mistake, looking down just as he catches your waist, your surprised shriek, and his unrestrained laughter breaks through the quiet of the forest.
“You done running now, pet?” he locks his hands on your back, pushing you close until he is carrying both your weight in the water, chin resting on your chest as your hands run through his soaking hair.
Your darkened hair frames your face, like a sheer curtain it drops, teasing his cheeks, and hiding your conversation from the rest of the forest – in the dimness, your eyes have never been more radiant, even if it was clearly pissed at him.
Skinship wasn’t foreign between the two of you. When you’ve saved each other’s lives from certain death more times than you care to count, cuddling is the least of your worries.
But there is something about the forest's silence, the sparse moonlight that peaks through the dense trees, the sound of the droplets falling from your hair to the water, and the distant echoes of the animals that make everything intimate. -- more intimate than usual.
“Are you?” you throw his question back at him mercilessly, your hands on the back of his neck, locking his face to look up at you – finally at you. The weeklong separation had been torture and now that the distance had cut his regular contact with his favorite witch, he finally realized how fast his heart was beating when he was around her.
He smiles.
He was satisfied, he swore he was.
Sebastian’s life was finally okay – passable, up-to-scratch, satisfactory. He shouldn’t strive for more, couldn’t allow himself that luxury – the luxury of love, the luxury of you.
But as he stares at your eyes, as he feels the ice in your skin, as he imagines a future where it wasn't him that gets to bite the plump of your lips – that dirty, greedy part of him crawls out of the hole he had shoved it in.
He feels it win.
“Are you done running now?” you whisper, a droplet falls from the tip of your nose to the space just below his eyes, his breath hitches, like your magnetic presence had sucked out all the air of the forest.
“I wasn’t running,” she raises a brow, and Sebastian presses his lips to your ears. “I was thinking.”
“And?”
Leander was right: he really is a bastard.
But he’s a bastard who will no longer wait for another life to love you. He's a bastard who will get what he wants.
“I think,” he whispers, at peace. “I think I’m gonna marry you someday.”
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I keep rewatching that epilogue scene and, the way Hunter and Omega talk about her joining the Rebellion... You can tell this is not the first time they're having this conversation. And I just can't help but wonder what the previous one(s) must have looked like.
Because something tells me it wasn't peaceful.
I just can't imagine Hunter having any other reaction than an immediate, definitive "absolutely not" the first time he hears about Omega wanting to join the Rebellion. Just like I can't imagine Omega being okay with that reaction.
Were they arguing about it? Were they butting heads and not backing down from their respective points? Because they would. Absolutely, they would.
Did their brothers have conversations with both of them separately? Did Wrecker tell Omega to give Hunter a break because he's old and worried? Did Crosshair convince Hunter that he can't keep a grown woman grounded just because he's scared about her? Did Echo tell him that if this is Omega's calling, he has to let her do her thing?
She tried to sneak off. As if she didn't want to go through this again. As if she thought leaving without a goodbye would be easier on everyone and this way no one can stop her. After all, she made up her mind. She's going. But when she turns the light on and spots Hunter sitting there, she's not even surprised. She nods to herself like of course. Of course he's here.
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This literally sounds like they've been over this before. But this time the conversation is surely more peaceful. They both have the other's perspective in their minds now.
This is my choice and I know it scares you but I need you to understand.
I know I won't change your mind but I don't want you to go, I want you to be safe.
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This must have been said before as well. Maybe in anger. Maybe in pleading. Or desperation. I wouldn't be surprised if Omega got very frustrated with Hunter for treating her like she's still a kid. Nor would I be shocked if Hunter had trouble articulating his point of view in all his worry and panic. But here, it's a confession. It's very vulnerable. It's the truth Hunter doesn't want to hear and gives a reason why.
Omega is a grown woman now. Skilled, capable, brave. Hunter doesn't doubt that. But to him, she's always going to be his little girl no matter how old she is and I am still speechless at the fact that we actually see him not only struggling with it but also admitting to it.
Back on Pabu, after they escaped Tantiss, Hunter told her: "We've all fought enough battles for one lifetime." And now, years later, Omega echoes this back to him. "You've all fought enough." Almost like she's reading Hunter's mind and knows that if he can't stop her, he's going to want to join her.
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The way he wants to reach after her here when she gets up. Like he wants to say wait, no, don't go yet!
But this is her fight, just like she says. She's never been able to sit still, we know that, we've seen that. Just like Echo back in season 2, she can't stand the thought of staying down and doing nothing when there are people out there fighting for freedom. People she can help. She's a skilled pilot now (I can bet she'll become most famous in the Rebellion for her flawless Tech-Turn), she has absorbed everything her brothers have taught her over the years like a sponge and now she wants to use that. After years of living away from the fight, she's finally ready to get back out there and make a difference in the galaxy. Fight for peace because that is her calling.
She's ready, but Hunter is not.
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You can tell it's literally tearing him apart to watch her go. That's his baby, the whole reason he's living the life he has now. He gave his blood, sweat and tears so she could grow up safe and happy and away from the Empire's clutches. And now she's going back right into them, willingly.
But she's all grown up. And he has no choice but to let her go do her thing. So he holds her close and I don't doubt sends out a prayer that she comes back to him safe and in one piece. He closes his eyes and commits the feeling to memory because who knows when will be the next time he gets to do this?
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And it might be destroying him inside but he's so damn proud. And he knows she's got this. She doesn't need her old man to watch her back anymore.
And yet still this old man, with gray in his hair and beard, this old man whose posture is hunched and who is moving slowly and having difficulty standing up because of his accelerated age, is telling his very grown up and very capable daughter that if she needs him, he's going to pick up his blaster, don the armor and join her in the fight.
Because that's what fathers do.
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daddy all along
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pairing: leon x reader
cw: smut, daddy kink, age-gap, hurt/comfort, alcoholism, daddy issues, morally dubious behavior, virgin reader, reader is 21 during all sexual/suggestive scenes but there is a non-sexual scene at the beginning where reader is a child.
word count: 7k
summary: leon is reader's dad's best friend. he has known you since you were very little and has acted as a secondary father figure at different times in your life because your father is an alcoholic/workaholic. but leon's not your dad, he's actually there for you (and he's very sexy). your dad misses your 21st birthday and leaves you with leon, and you convince him to take your virginity.
a/n: no, you should not do this in real life. this is purely for fiction. yes, it is weird to write reader as a child and then as an adult. if you don't want to see this type of content, then don't read it.
part 2
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You remember the first time you called Leon 'Daddy.' It was the first time you slept with him, on your 21st birthday. That's your version of the truth but not the truth. Leon remembers the first time you called him 'Daddy.' You were three years old. 
"Leon," a tiny voice whispered, and with it came even tinier footsteps down the stairs.
Leon paused the TV and turned towards you.
"What is it, princess?" he said, matching your tone.
"I can't sleep," you pouted.
He motioned for you to come closer, and you did. 
"Why is that?" he asked, lifting you into his lap.
Sitting on his knee, you said, "I'm scared of monsters". 
"But there aren't monsters, sweet pea."
"But what if there are, and we can't see them?" 
He looked into your big eyes and saw the genuine worry behind them. He pulled you closer, towards one hip, so that he could safely stand with you in his arms. 
"How about we check one more time, and I'll show you that there are no monsters?"
You nodded, head pressed to his chest, relaxing into the comfort of his arms. 
He put you down in your bed and looked through every corner of your room - the back of your closet, under the bed, every drawer in your dresser - to prove there were no monsters. 
"And even if a monster came in here, I'll be right downstairs, so they'll have to go through me before they can come get you."
"What if the monster gets you?"
"The monsters never win against me."
And that was true. You were too young to understand what he meant, though. 
"Can you sleep in here?"
"I can't fit in your bed, princess."
"When I get scared, sometimes Dad sleeps on the floor."
Leon had been substituting for Dad more and more frequently. It made him upset, not at you, but for you. He couldn't believe that, especially after your mother had abandoned you both, your father would choose work, women, and alcohol over you. Someone had to choose you, and that someone was going to be Leon. He always wanted to save people and to be a good man. Heck, he even imagined himself as a father before Raccoon City flipped his life upside down. Since then, he'd resigned to the idea that he'd never get the stereotypical wife and two kids living in a house with a white picket fence. The closest Leon would get to being a family man was when he slept in your father's guest room. He'd made peace with that. 
So, that night, he slept poorly on your bedroom floor, even after you bargained with you to give him a pillow. You gave him one of your stuffed animals, too, thinking it might help him in the way that it helped you. He nearly cried at how thoughtful you were as a little kid.
"Thank you, sweet pea," he said, accepting your thoughtful gift. 
You smiled, rubbed your sleepy eyes, and said, "Goodnight, Daddy."
Leon heard what you called him, but he never acknowledged it to you. He had a good poker face. 
"Goodnight," he said, pressing a kiss to your forehead. 
You slept, thank god, and as he suspected, no monsters appeared. 
This went on periodically throughout your childhood, your father being gone, and Leon stepping in. At some point, you got old enough that Leon didn't have to sleep on your bedroom floor as you no longer believed in monsters. Ironic, he thought, considering what he'd seen, but he'd never share the horrors of his job with you, even if the government would let him. No one deserved to bear that kind of hurt, not even he did. 
Leon was around less once you were old enough to take care of yourself. According to your father, he'd been going through some things - those things remained unspecified, but you put together the pieces once you saw him. 
Alcohol. That's what your father meant. It took your father away from you, and you feared Leon would be next. Leon drank a little too much, too often, and when he did, you distanced yourself from him. He never told you that he'd noticed the way you shied away from him, how you always retreated to the safe space of your bedroom when he was over. On the surface, you handled it all quite well. You didn't yell at Leon and tell him to get sober, you didn't cry yourself to sleep, you bypassed the first four stages of grief when you felt like you were losing him. Too used to being disappointed, you preemptively resigned yourself to the fact that he would end up like your father: gone, in one way or another. 
Leon got better, though, unlike your father. Neither of you ever talked about it, but your rift mended itself. Leon watched your face light up in hope and gratitude when he refused the drink your father offered him for the first time in a long time. Your hello and goodbye hugs returned, and you made noticeable efforts to linger in his presence; most notably, you went back to derailing the conversation whenever it came to bedtime, something you'd done since you were a kid. 
You became a debate champion and a master manipulator when it came to convincing Leon to let you stay up later. Every argument was futile, and he knew it; he continued to play your games for fun, but you had the key to his heart whether you knew it or not, and he would always give in to you. 
Leon didn't need to babysit you anymore as you got older, and his work life got increasingly busy. Plus, he had to spend time on therapy and self-care now that he'd decided to get sober. Thus, he saw you less often. It was okay, though; you had secretly and very loosely planned to visit him in D.C. once you graduated college, got a big girl job, and were no longer governed by your father's rule. 
Adulthood couldn't come sooner.
For your 21st birthday, you were hoping you could go out with a friend - or go to a party, though you wouldn't tell your dad the second part. However, you had been grounded for partying the weekend before - indefinitely, so your 21st would be spent at home with your dad. It could be a blessing in disguise, you thought initially, since your dad was rarely around. Now, you'd finally get to spend some quality time together. But alas, you were so very wrong about that. At the very last minute, your father was called out on an urgent work mission. 
When you were a child, this was his standard excuse for anything from a date to a night out on the town with friends. Sometimes, though, he really was needed at work. You'd allow yourself to believe it this time as a birthday gift. You'd spend the night crying otherwise. 
The nail in the coffin was that your dad got you a 'babysitter.' A babysitter on your 21st birthday?! It seemed like there should be a way to legally refuse that kind of thing. You expected the babysitter to be the mean old woman who lived next door; maybe if you were lucky, her daughter, who was slightly less of a bitch, would be in town, and your dad could pay her to take care of you instead. 
You were in your room, beginning your pity party, when the doorbell rang. 
"Honey, your babysitter is here. How about you come down and say hi," your dad called. 
"Tell my babysitter to fuck off," you fired back.
"How about you come tell him yourself?"
Him? You thought. A male babysitter? 
You walked downstairs to give this man a piece of your mind, making sure your resting bitch face was securely in place, but when you made it halfway down the stairs, you met the man's eyes and realized, "Leon?!" 
You ran into his arms, which were already outstretched for you. 
"Hey, Princess," he chuckled into your hair, "did you have something you wanted to say to me?"
"I missed you?"
"No, I thought you were coming down to tell me to 'fuck off.'"
"I didn't know it was you. I would never tell you that."
Your dad was already halfway out the door when he said, "Happy Birthday," with a wink, like they'd planned this night all along. There was no way in your mind that your father was a wingman and not a tyrannical dictator, at least not until that night. 
You were a simple woman and could be satisfied with pizza, a movie, and your favorite middle-aged man sitting next to you on the couch. 
Leon called the pizza place and ordered the usual for the both of you: half of your favorite toppings and half of his. The estimated delivery time was 30 minutes, according to the person on the phone. 
"What's your bet?" Leon asked, hanging up. 
"45 minutes," you said. 
"Wow, you're pessimistic today," he said. 
"No, I'm realistic, and I'm accounting for traffic," you said, "What's your guess?"
"One dollar," he said. 
You played by The Price is Right rules - whoever is the closest without going over wins. The prize? The loser has to answer the door when the doorbell rings. It was a low-stakes game.
40 minutes later, Leon was crowned the winner, but you still made him get the door because it was your birthday. 
There was another tradition your family shared surrounding pizza; it was an ancient memory but so well-preserved. When you were much younger, having lost the little guessing game, your father answered the door, and Leon remarked off-handedly that the woman was beautiful - she was out of earshot, of course. Your dad jokingly offered to ask for her number on his behalf. 
So, when Leon returned with a mischievous smile, you should've known what he was going to say.  
"Here, princess," he said, handing you the receipt, "got his number for you. It's right on the back."
"You did not!" you took the receipt in your hands and searched for a phone number on the back, falling for Leon's tricks. 
"I did not, you're right." Leon stuck his tongue out at you, as you used to do to him when you were a little girl. 
You returned the gesture, and he served you up a slice of pizza, serving himself second like a gentleman would. 
Unlike old times, you were allowed to eat in the living room since you'd reached an age where you could be trusted not to ruin the furniture.
On his way to the couch, he made a detour to ruffle your hair. "Movie?" he asked, holding the remote.
"Sure." You sat down beside him, a respectful distance away.
Leon wanted to watch something new, but you wanted to watch Jerry Maguire for the umpteenth time. So, naturally, you compromised by watching Jerry Maguire.  
At some point during the movie, you turned to him and said, "I just realized I don't know anything about you." 
That was the truth. The only things that you'd gathered from the many years you'd spent around Leon was that he wore a leather jacket, he rode a motorcycle, which you were not allowed to touch, and whatever cologne he wore smelled delightful. You couldn't pinpoint the particular scent, couldn't tell cedar from pine. If you had to describe it, you'd say it smelled familiar and good. You'd never seen him with a woman, and you weren't allowed to know anything about his job, similar to your father's. 
"What do you wanna know?" Leon asked.
You hadn't really thought that far. You didn't expect him to be so receptive to your questioning. 
"Have you ever been in love?" you blurted out.
He tilted his head to the side, confused about why you'd ask about his love life. 
"What?" he asked with a mouthful of pizza.
"I asked -"
"- I heard what you said; I was just wondering why you asked."
"I don't know, really."
"Okay, uh, yeah, I've been in love before," he said, looking towards the ceiling like he was trying to find a memory, "It was a long time ago, though."
"Okay."
"Is that sufficient?"
"I doubt I'll get anything else out of you, so it'll have to do, I guess."
"Smart girl. You say you don't know much about me, but you know me better than you think."
Leon went on to ask you questions about school, your friends, and the like, trying to shift the spotlight from his life onto yours. Getting information from him was like pulling teeth. It made you wonder if he'd learned to keep his secrets due to his line of work or if he was always a private guy. 
"Leon?"
"Yes, princess?"
"Can I ask you another question?"
"Based on your last question, I should probably say no, but because it's your birthday, I'll let you continue your interrogation."
"It's not an interrogation. You're not in handcuffs or anything."
"Uh-huh," he said with an eye-roll, "Ask away before I change my mind."
"When did you lose your virginity?" you blurted out.
He choked on his water, spitting it onto his shirt. 
"Wow, okay, that's - you're really going there, aren't you?"
"Just answer the question."
"I can't plead the fifth?"
"It's a normal question; you're making it weird." You couldn't meet his eyes and opted to look down at your feet. 
Maybe he pitied you because he answered after a deep breath. "I was, uh, 16."
"Was it any good?"
He sighed. "It was okay… for me, at least. I don't know how much she enjoyed it. Didn't really know what I was doing back then."
You hummed in response, nodding and briefly looking up to see his face. 
"How 'bout you?" he asked in an unexpected turn of events.
"What?" 
"Didn't think you could get away without answering the question, too, did you?"
"Oh," you started, "I'm, uh, I haven't yet."
"Nothing to be ashamed of; it's normal at your age. Not that I'd know, of course."
He was always the one to try to lighten the mood, and it pretty much always worked. You laughed and playfully smacked him before saying, "I'm gonna go get in my pj's, I think." 
"Good idea. Gimme your plate, and I'll clean up."
You handed him your plate on the way out of the room, quickly making your way upstairs. You had a plan. 
Every man had a sex drive; every man had something that made them tick, but what was that special thing for Leon? How could you entice him if you'd never seen him with a woman? You had no idea what he liked, so all you could do was guess. 
You had a cute pink nightgown ready for this occasion. It was all silky with lace trim and all too revealing of your decolletage, peeking through the top, as well as the tiniest pair of panties you owned. A lace thong that matched the trim of the nightgown perfectly.
You waltzed downstairs to find Leon in the kitchen doing the dishes by hand. You decided that you should get a glass of water to put on a little show for Leon. You reached up to the top shelf to grab a glass, which made your nightgown ride up, showing your entire ass, subsequently bending down to reach the filtered water in the fridge, giving Leon a similar view. You couldn't tell if he was looking, but you lingered, teasing him, begging him to take a look. When you turned around, you caught him turning his head in the opposite direction. He knew he'd been caught, too. 
You took your glass of water to the couch and sat down, knowing that unless he wanted to walk out the back door, Leon would have to face you in the living room. You could see him trying to fix his pants in a way that would hide his hard-on, but you could still see the bulge when he came into the living room and sat down next to you. He didn't dare look below your neck. You scooted closer to him, and he pretended to look at the clock before saying, "You know what? I'm going to change into something more comfortable as well," and promptly headed upstairs. 
When he came back, he was wearing a white t-shirt and gray sweatpants, which did a piss-poor job of hiding his erection. You sat there all pretty, smiling at him, watching him shift his weight from foot to foot. 
"It's pretty late. I think it's getting close to bedtime," he said, acting like you were still a child.
"Okay," you said, pouting, pretending to be reluctant to walk towards him. 
You sauntered over, and he made a deliberate effort not to look at you. 
"Will you tuck me in?" you asked, using your cute little pouty face on him - the one that always worked. 
"Don't you think you're a little old for that, princess?"
Princess? He must be messing with you. He must know he's making you want him even more, right?
"Please, Leon. It's my birthday."
"Fine. Since it's your birthday, I guess I have to tuck you in, don't I?"
He gestured for you to walk upstairs first. Maybe he did want to get a peek at your ass. 
You sat on the edge of the bed, hands in your lap, back straight, with a smile. A good girl.
Leon's figure loomed in the doorway. "I'm gonna level with you here," he started, "I don't know what you're trying to do, but you and I both know this is an act."
"What's an act?" you continued to feign innocence. 
"The naive little girl thing. The tiny nightgown, the pouty face, bending over in the kitchen."
"It's your problem if you're turned on by it."
"Who said anything about being turned on by it?"
You looked him in the eyes, then down at his sweatpants, which did nothing to hide his arousal, and then back at his eyes. 
He was red in the face. "Fine. You win. Happy?"
"What do I win?"
"Getting to see me embarrassed. That's what you wanted, isn't it?"
"No."
"Then what is it that you want?" He crossed his arms, waiting for you to say it. 
"You."
He shook his head. "Mm-mm. Nope."
"Why not? You want me too."
"It's not right. That's why."
But he didn't deny it. 
"I'm 21. I'm an adult."
"But I'm still too old for you. And I've known you since you were a baby."
"And that's exactly why we should feel comfortable around each other."
"I have no problem being comfortable with you in a non-sexual context."
"But it's my birthday."
"You already played that card, princess."
"Please?"
"Please, what?"
"Just one kiss?"
He closed his eyes and rubbed the bridge of his nose, contemplating. 
"I won't tell anyone," you promised preemptively. 
"One." He walked towards you. "But that's it." 
"Deal, but it better be a real kiss. Not like a friendly peck on the lips."
You'd probably given him one of those when you were a toddler. This was different.
"I should've known you'd negotiate further." He pretended to be exasperated, but his smile betrayed him. He had a soft spot for you. "What are the terms?"
"It has to last at least 30 seconds."
"10."
"20 is the lowest I'll go."
"20 for the birthday girl."
He closed his eyes and leaned in. His lips were soft, and his mouth tasted minty. You weren't counting the seconds and hoping he wasn't, either. You knew you were pushing it when you brought your tongue into the equation, but he'd already given in to you. He allowed the tip of his tongue to meet yours.  
He pulled away first. Quickly, so you couldn't catch him and pull him back in. 
"You happy now?" he asked, much more amused than annoyed.
You stared at him, seeing stars already. 
"I think that was only 10 seconds." The edges of lips curved upwards slowly. 
"Oh really? I think it was at least a minute."
"I was counting."
"No, you were not."
Despite protesting, he was still sitting in your bed, laughing with you. 
"But Leon-"
"But what, princess?" He cocked his head to the side, taunting you. 
You were out of bargaining chips. You'd played every card that wasn't flat-out begging him. 
"Did you at least think it was good?" you asked, needing his approval more than anything.
"It was great." He sounded sincere, and you hoped that he meant it more than anything. 
"Really? You promise you'd never lie to me?" you held out your pinky and he took it in his. 
"Promise," he said.
When he was about to stand up, you said, "But if it was good, then why don't you want more?"
He flopped back on your bed and sighed in exasperation. "Because it's not appropriate."
"But that doesn't mean you don't want it."
"No, but it doesn't matter. I'm the adult in the situation, and I'm telling you it's a bad idea."
"I'm the adult, too, and I think it's a great idea."
"Well, I have more experience than you, and I know it's a bad idea."
"If you have more experience, then you can help me."
"How many more arguments do you have? Just hit me with all of them so I can give you a collective 'no,' and then we can both go to bed."
You could see his frustrations dueling in his mind. He was tired of your arguing, but the more frustrated he got at you, still sitting next to him in a tiny pink nightgown, the more he wanted you. His gentle, sweet sexual fantasies about you were being replaced by rougher ones. He knew that if he told you to turn around and get on all fours, you'd do it. He could spank you as punishment for your naughty behavior, and you'd like it. 
"I was going to resort to begging next."
"And you think that would break me?"
"It always does."
"Because I have a weak spot for you," he paused, "and because you usually aren't asking me for sex."
"Who said I was asking for sex?"
He glared at you, knowing that was exactly what you wanted.
"You said that you lost your virginity at my age," you said, hoping your reasoning would make sense to him.
"And?" He understood, but that didn't mean he agreed. 
"I don't want to be a virgin anymore. I wanna be cool like you, Leon."
You'd told him that before, wearing his leather jacket that was too big for you, waddling around the house as a kindergartner. 
"Well, then find a nice guy - or girl - your age and do that on your own time."
"But I want you."
He closed his eyes, resigning himself to the fact that he might have to give into you while he still wanted you gently. Otherwise, with your track record, you'd get him to concede to your wishes, but only after losing self-control, which was the only thing holding him back from tying you to the headboard. 
"You don't know this yet because you haven't had this experience yet, but it's hard not to get attached to the first person you're with."
"And? We're already close."
"Not like that, though. We're not dating, not married, and we never will be. I'm trying to protect you."
"I'm not proposing marriage."
"Thank god."
"You've protected me from everything my whole life. Now I'm an adult, and I want to choose. Remember when I was little, you used to say, 'I'll tell you when you're older' or 'When you're an adult, you can make your own choices'? I'm not your responsibility anymore, Leon."
"You never were." He took your hand because he still loved you despite it all. "I care about you, so I can't let you get hurt, but I also can't be with you. And things aren't going to be the same if we do this."
"I promise I'll be okay. I can handle it."
He sat silently for a moment before finally saying, "You're not going to tell your dad, right?"
"No, god no, never."
"You're not going to brag to your friends?"
"Are you saying I'd want to brag? That you're worthy of such high praise?"
"I'd like to think I'm decent at it."
"Is this you agreeing?" Your eyes lit up the way they did whenever you got your way. 
"I'm exhausted, you're in a tiny nightgown, and you're begging. I'm powerless against you."
"And I thought that Leon Kennedy could have me pinned down in under a second."
"Is that what you'd like?"
"Maybe." At this point, you were hovering over him, one leg outside each of his. You sat down, straddling him, and he struggled to keep a straight face. 
"Have you done anything before?" He asked. 
You made a lewd gesture, indicating that you'd performed oral sex on a guy before.
"You're gonna have to be more mature than that if we're gonna do this." 
"Fine. I sucked a guy's dick once." You didn't want to be so vulgar, but how else were you supposed to say it? 
"Good for you." Leon pretended to be unimpressed, but in truth, he was thinking about the view that guy must've gotten. How perfect you'd look on your knees. 
"No, good for him."
"He didn't reciprocate?"
Leon's hands were gripping your hips. You couldn't tell if he wanted you to move or if he was trying to keep you still. 
"That's too bad. You're a good girl. You deserve it."
"A good girl?" Your voice faltered, and your eyes said it all. 
"Yes, a very good girl." He leaned down and caught your mouth in a quick kiss. 
Even looming over you, he looked hesitant to touch you, like you were too delicate and fragile.
"You wanna take this off?" he asked, toying with the hem of your nightgown.
"Only if you agree to take your shirt off."
"Deal."
He sat up and took his shirt off. You could see how his arms flexed when he did it and his now-exposed chest and abs.
"How do you look so good at your age?" You meant to keep that thought to yourself, but your mouth had a mind of its own. As you spoke, you ran your hands down his chest, noting that his body felt as lovely as it looked. 
"I'm not sure if I should be offended that you called me old or flattered that you think I look good."
"You look hot."
"You gonna hold up your end of the deal?"
You sat up and removed your nightgown, revealing a tiny white thong with a little bow. 
"Cute," he mused, playing with the bow. 
"I didn't know what you liked, so I had to guess."
"You did a great job."
His large hands cupped one of your now-exposed breasts in each hand, thumbs running over your nipples, making you shiver. 
He hummed in satisfaction at your reaction. Seeing your face flush, he said, "Don't be embarrassed, princess."
You didn't have time to answer before his lips were on yours again, making their way down your neck, stopping to whisper into your ear.
"Promise you'll tell me if I do anything you don't like?"
"Promise."
With open-mouthed kisses, he made his way down to your chest, letting his tongue circle each nipple, looking for weaknesses. It wasn't hard to find them. You were soaking through the thin lace of your panties. 
Feeling Leon's lips on your tits, you let out a small moan and tried to cover any others up with a hand over your mouth. Leon removed your hand and said, "Mm-mm. If I do this for you, you can't cover your mouth. I wanna hear your pretty noises."
He made his way to the hem of your panties. The lace barely covered anything. You felt him lap at your folds through the fabric, making you gasp. 
"Can I take them off?"
"Uh-huh."
 He looked up into your eyes, which had no thoughts behind them other than how much you needed this. He removed your panties, teasing you with kisses on your hip bones and thighs, wanting to see if you'd beg for a feeling you'd never felt. 
He made eye contact while he flicked his tongue over your clit, anticipating your strong reaction. You threw your head back and gripped the sheets.
"Already, princess? I've barely even done anything to you," He mumbled into your skin. 
There were infinite combinations of words in the English language that could accurately describe your embarrassment, but they were all out of reach, as pleasure had taken your mind hostage.
When Leon had imagined this moment - and yeah, he'd imagined it, filled with such intense lust and followed by an even larger wave of guilt - he'd imagined his fingers inside you by this point. But, now, he was just letting his tongue glide along your folds, trying to tease you, trying to taste you, trying to burn a memory onto his mental hard drive of this moment. He pressed a kiss to your clit and watched as your eyes rolled back and you arched your body off the bed. He'd never seen a woman so sensitive, though. He'd never done anything with a virgin before. Most of the women he'd hooked up with in the past decade were in their 30s. 
"Leon," You whined.
"I know, baby girl. Let go for me," he said softly, looking into your eyes with a loving gaze. 
He sucked lightly on your clit, leading you through your orgasm. The intense sensation coursed through your entire body, making your thighs tremble, and your moans turn into sobs.
"Oh my god. Daddy!" In the heat of the moment, it just came out. 
Leon didn't pull away, despite his surprise - truthfully, he couldn't have because your thighs kept him in a headlock. You could've suffocated him, maybe even broken his neck like that, but he was strong enough that he could push your legs apart if he really needed to breathe. Not that he cared very much. Leon had faced death enough times to know that this would've been one of the best ways to go. He'd take his chances if it meant he got an extra minute between your thighs.
"Daddy, huh? Thought you were an innocent little girl. Shoulda known better."
"Sorry. It was just so good, and I wasn't thinking."
"I know, princess. I'm glad I could make you feel good."
He kissed each cheek and your forehead. The way he'd always done when he put you to bed.
"You wanna go to bed now?" he asked. You couldn't tell if he wanted a 'yes' or a 'no'. The smile on his face was the same as it always was - happy and warm and honest. It was the same look he'd given you when he'd said goodnight to you for decades. He wanted you to sleep because he cared about you but didn't mind having you stay up because he loved you. 
"No, I don't wanna go to bed," you said, reaching down to palm him through his sweatpants.
He gave you a look of arousal poorly concealed by hesitation to take things any further.
"I don't wanna hurt you," he said. 
You pouted, and he was defenseless.
"Always get what you want," he said under his breath.
You hooked your thumbs in the waistband of his sweatpants, and he took them off.
When you tried to go for his underwear, he said, "Yeah, yeah. Gimme a second."
He got out of bed, and you whined. 
"I'll be right there." He feigned annoyance, but he obviously still found you cute. 
"What are you doing?"
"Looking for my wallet. It's probably in the other room."
He went to your guest room next door, and you were initially confused, worried he'd left you. Until he came back with a condom held between two fingers. 
"Did you know this was going to happen?"
"No, but I'm always prepared."
It was the truth. No way in Hell did he ever think this would happen when he came to your house.
"Would you ever do it without one?"
"If you're proposing that, the answer is absolutely not."
Secretly, you both wished for him to be inside you without the rubber barrier. You watched him pull out his dick and slip on the condom unceremoniously as if this wasn't the most important moment of your life thus far. 
He caught you ogling. "What? Impressed or disappointed?"
He knew the answer. It wasn't the first time he'd gotten that kind of reaction. 
"Do you think it's gonna fit?" you asked.
"No need to flatter me, sweetheart. You've already got me in bed."
"I'm being serious."
"I'll go slow," he assured you, voice quiet and sweet.
He brushed his thumb across your cheek. He kissed you with such tenderness you felt like you might melt. 
You got a rush of adrenaline watching him line himself up at your entrance. Both from excitement and nerves. You truly were worried about whether it would fit inside you. 
The first thrust was a bit painful - nothing excruciating, just a bit of discomfort - but Leon, worried about you, immediately pulled back and asked, "What's wrong, baby girl? Did I hurt you?"
You nodded meekly and made the "little bit" sign with your pointer and thumb. 
"Okay. Lemme try something else then."
At this point, he had pulled entirely out of you, and he started to play with your clit lazily while gazing at your face. All discomfort faded from your expression and was replaced by pleasure. He had you nearly writhing again over such minimal contact. 
In his deep, silky voice, he said, "Open," pushing two fingers into your mouth, making sure he didn't go too far and make you gag. 
You knew he wanted you to wet them for him, but you decided to give him a little show, too. You looked into his eyes while sucking his fingers, swirling your tongue around them. You could tell he was trying to keep his composure, but you could feel his dick twitch against your leg. 
Though he was enjoying the sight, he removed his fingers from your mouth and pushed them, one, then both, into you and gently stroked your inner walls. His other hand was tending to your clit all the while, and you began to feel the pressure in your abdomen rise again. It must've shown on your face because he started pumping his fingers in and out of you with greater force until you were teetering on the edge of a second orgasm. Your walls clenched around his fingers, and he promptly took them away.
"Why did you do that?" You whined with tears, acting like it was the greatest betrayal. 
"It's okay, princess. I'm gonna let you come. I wanna be inside you when you do, though."
You felt the head prodding at your entrance; the only thing you felt was a desire for more. The feeling of being stretched out took a moment to adjust to, but it felt good to be filled. He gently gave himself to you inch by inch. 
"You're doing so good for me, princess."
"Daddy?" you said in a voice neither of you had ever heard before.
"Yes, baby?" Leon's breath hitched. It didn't matter how wrong it was; it was too good. 
I love you. Those were the words you wanted to say, and 'I love you, Leon' was something you'd said a thousand times, but it was never 'Daddy, I love you' - and it was never during sex, obviously. 
"Thank you," you said - for what? You weren't sure, but Leon seemed to get the gist. 
He didn't say anything, just smiled and then pressed a kiss to your cheek, still thrusting in and out of you, speeding up when he knew you could take it. 
The face Leon made when he bottomed out inside you was a heavenly sight. It made you tighten around him, eliciting a low groan from him. He took one hand from beside your head and slid it down between your thighs, touching you where you needed it most. The feeling of him rubbing your clit as he fucked you made your pussy spasm around him. 
"Gonna be a good girl and come for Daddy?" he asked. 
"Oh my god, Daddy!" You nearly screamed when you came. 
Leon did his best to hide his feelings about that word, maintaining the rhythm of his thrusts, thumb not leaving your clit. The physical sensation of you clenching around him nearly sent him over the edge with you, but the conflicting feelings that 'Daddy' gave him held him back. Maybe it was a blessing in disguise.
If you'd told him before that moment that you wanted to call him 'Daddy,' he would've thought it was odd, but watching your eyes roll back and feeling your nails dig into his back as you said it made it sexy. 
Once your orgasm subsided, he allowed himself to let go. Your eyes fluttered back open just in time to watch his face as he came. 
"Fuck," he groaned, drawn out, followed by heavy breaths. 
You were still a bit dazed when he got up, threw the condom in the trash, and immediately collapsed beside you. You were greeted with a kiss on the forehead once you returned to Earth. 
Leon stopped himself from saying, "I love you," even though you'd both said it to each other a thousand times over the years. The fact remained that both of you loved each other, but the specificities of that love had now become blurry. 
At the risk of embarrassing you, he asked, "So, the whole 'Daddy' thing?"
"I'm sorry. Did it weird you out?"
"I wouldn't put it like that."
"You can just say it did."
"No, it's just – it feels wrong considering the circumstances."
"Yeah, I know. I shouldn't have let myself get that carried away."
"There's no reason to be embarrassed about it. It wasn't a turn-off. I still came, so the proof is… well, it's in your trash can."
You smiled at his attempt to lighten the mood, but your face was still bright red. 
"You really shouldn't feel bad about it. It's no big deal."
"But it is. You said it - because…" 
You couldn't say, "You're like a second father to me," or anything else that came to mind. The whole thing simultaneously made more and less sense. Of course, he was 'Daddy' in your mind, but in more ways than one. 
"I know," he said simply. You didn't need to finish your sentence for him to understand. 
"Can you hold me?" You asked, getting teary-eyed for reasons more complicated than you could verbalize. Overstimulation, overwhelming pleasure, a closeness beyond what you'd ever felt with someone before, the sense that things had changed for good, concern that this had caused irreparable damage to whatever bond you'd had, but most of all, how angry you were at your real dad. 
"Of course, baby girl, c'mere," Leon said with arms wide open. He sat up in bed, knowing what you wanted. You sat in his lap and clung to him while he held you tightly. 
"I can't believe he couldn't even be here for my birthday," you sobbed, still naked in Leon's lap. 
"I know, and I'm sorry, princess. I'm upset about it, too."
He pressed little kisses into your hair.
You wondered if maybe Leon was right: you had gotten attached to him, but this part was always going to happen. In every reality, you would've ended up crying in his arms. 
All the emotions you tried to keep inside came out of your tear ducts at once, and you felt like a little girl. 
You got up eventually to pee because Leon forced you to. He put his pants back on and was about to do the same with his shirt when you asked, "Can I have it?"
"Yeah."
He threw it to you, not even thinking the same thing you were. He'd given girlfriends and hookups t-shirts to wear to bed, but it had nothing to do with sex at this moment; you needed the comfort you always would have. It was like a hug from him. The way you'd sleep in your dad's room when he wasn't home, just to feel like he was there.
You got into your bed, still wearing Leon's shirt, and he got up to leave, as he was supposed to, as you knew he would. Sleeping with you was never part of the agreement, but your eyes flooded with tears when you watched him leave. 
"Goodnight," he said at the door. 
You were too choked up to say it back. Leon waited for you to speak, knowing what you'd say. 
"Don't leave, please," you said, crying, not pouting, not whining, but crying. Leon remembered when you were a kid, and he slept on your bedroom floor because you didn't want to be alone. Because you cried and begged him not to leave, and he felt awful seeing your tears, knowing your mom walked out and your dad was rarely there, knowing that - whether you understood it or not - you meant, 'don't leave me like everyone else.' Leon couldn't do that to you, couldn't leave a neglected little girl alone. As he'd told you, he didn't have to do this by any obligation other than a self-imposed one. Sleeping in your bed right now was dangerous - your father could walk in, you could get the wrong idea and get more attached, you could try to go for round two - but, if you hadn't had sex, if he'd done the right thing in the first place and said no, you'd still have been crying in his arms, you'd still ask him to stay. The right thing to do would be to stay. 
He nodded and climbed into bed with you, letting you rest your head on his chest.
Leon was right: you were so very attached to him.
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1K notes · View notes
hollowdeath · 9 months
Note
Thank god, another Harry Potter lover! 👓⚡️He really deserves more love! ❤️ That’s why I imagine him and the reader settling in a cottage by the sea or lake (you decide) to heal from the Wizarding War. They find comfort and solace in each other, and yes that includes countless lovemaking. 🥰 It’s just the two of them, so they’re free to express their love whenever and wherever they want. They especially enjoy making love on the shore under the stars after a swim, by the fireplace on a soft blanket, and in the bathtub surrounded by candles. They just need to feel and hold each other to remind themselves that everything’s okay now. You can do whatever you want with this, I just wanted to put it out there. Take care!
thank you so much for this request, i fell in love with it as soon as you sent it! i hope you enjoy!
pairing: harry james potter x fem!reader (18+)
summary: you & harry have moved away from everything & everyone to a remote cottage where the forest meets the sea. all harry wants after everything he's been through is to find peace, & he finds it in you.
c/w: smut!!! oral sex, penetration, rough sex
word count: 7.3k
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harry was up early. he was watching the kettle boil on the gas stove in front of him, enjoying the warmth coming off of it, letting himself relax for just a moment. the steam from the water enveloped his face and felt nice. it was so chilly this morning. the windows were fogged over from the fire raving inside the stove, the wind whistling through the walls of the cottage.
the cottage was beautiful, harry couldn't deny it, though he could do with a bit more insulation. the raw, exposed stone walls were charming, and the moss and vines growing on the outside were something out of a fairy tale, but the fire needed to be fed every hour or so most of the day for at least half of the year or else it dropped below freezing inside. however, luckily, harry came to find wood chopping and trimming to be extremely therapeutic. just him, a sharp ax, and acres of woodlands to explore.
that was another thing harry could never deny about this property: the land was worth every penny. it's not often you find such a stunning cottage sitting on the border between a local forest and, what was essentially, a private beach on the north sea. the beach stretched at least a mile, but was obscured by the trees just behind the cottage. the land wasn't cheap, but harry was ready and extremely eager to spend whatever it took to finally get away from everything, live a simple life, and be alone.
alone with you, that is.
you and harry had gone to school together until the war, but eventually ended up reconnecting and began casually dating just over 2 years ago. since then you and harry had found complete solace in each other, both suffering from the negative side effects of witnessing and experiencing the war firsthand and supporting each other through difficult times. you were mostly struggling with paranoia and anxiety, and were actually the first to suggest getting a place together away from everyone else. you thought it would help if you were out of reach, isolated from the world, practically invisible from all danger.
harry, of course, was utterly haunted by the events of the war, and everything leading up to it. he gets angry at the world, has bouts of depression, deals with monumental grief and guilt, and has chronic, clinical sleep issues caused by nightmares. which is, ironically, the exact reason he's awake so early right now.
as he's pouring the boiling water out of the kettle and over a tea bag, harry can feel his eyelids fighting to stay open. he's barely slept this week, and he's starting to feel the effects of it. he's lightheaded, detached, and just wants to rest.
as he's walking to the front porch, mug in hand, harry takes a moment to pause in the doorway of your master bedroom and admire you. sleeping, surrounded by white cotton comforters, drowning in pillows, your hair wildly framing your peaceful face. he just stays there for a while, leaning against the doorframe, watching. he often watches you sleep when he can't himself. it brings him relief knowing you can get the rest you need.
before he heads outside harry slips on his favorite quarter zip. as he's sitting on the stairs outside, he admires the sound of the waves crashing just a few hundred or so yards away from him. he finishes his hot cup of tea, closes his eyes and lets himself sit in the cold waves of the wind. it's nice. like sleeping without the nightmares.
the moment is short lived as he hears the door creak open behind him. he looks back, and is in disbelief at how beautiful you look just waking up. a nightdress that barely covers anything at all draping around your shoulders, messy bed hair, sleepy eyes and a smile as you stand with the door cracked open, admiring harry in return.
"morning," you say simply, your voice still soft and hoarse from sleeping. harry smiles at you with soft and loving eyes. you walk towards him and let the door close behind you as you cuddle up next to harry on the stairs.
you don't seem to mind the chill in the air. your exposed skin is still hot from the fire burning inside. you lean your head on harry's shoulder, reaching for his mug, seeing there's nothing left, and leaving the mug in his hands. harry's chest hums as he chuckles. "would you like some? kettle's still warm," he asks.
you shake your head. you want to stay right here with harry in this moment.
the sea is so beautiful at this time of the morning. the sun was up, but only just barely above the horizon. no clouds, no birds, just the waves and the wind carrying their breeze.
speaking of breeze, you begin to shiver the longer you're out there in only a sleep dress. you still want to stay with harry, enjoying the view with him, but he notices you shaking.
"darling, let's get you inside,"
harry sits you in front of the stove and opens the small latch, letting the door stay open as you attempt to warm your hands. harry feeds the fire and rearranges the coals to make it burn hotter for you. after a minute or so, he also slips off his quarter zip and pulls it over your torso, smiling to himself at just how big it looks on you.
you find yourself finally starting to warm up, your toes burying themselves into the fur rug you're sitting on. after harry pours you a cup of tea, he joins you next to the fire. "thank you," you tell him with a smile, eagerly taking a sip of the warm drink.
harry's arm wraps around you and he watches the fire as you continue to sip your tea, enjoying the feeling of it warming you up from the inside.
you relish this moment with harry. since moving here barely a month ago, you've grown so fond of these smaller moments throughout the day with him. watching the scenery, watching the fire, sitting in comfortable silence, sharing a kettle of tea in the morning and afternoon, simply enjoying each other's company and the peace you've created for yourselves. it was one of your favorite parts about settling into this little slice of life.
and, of course, there was all the alone time.
while living with harry at grimmauld place was lovely, there was never truly a moment alone with him there. you had your own room with locked doors, but could hear someone walking, talking, cooking, always something in the background.
here, you were completely alone. a lot of people might find this situation to be even more terrifying, being so far away from everything, but you both agreed the isolation made you feel safer. safe from death eaters, safe from drama, safe from other people.
the safety from being so alone out here also meant that you and harry could be vulnerable with each other 24/7. you never had to put on a face or pretend things were okay if they weren't. if harry had nightmares, he could make some tea and enjoy a moment outside alone without anyone trying to psychoanalyze him. if you wanted to lay in bed until it was dark out again, harry wasn't going to judge you for it.
that vulnerability spread into other parts of your life as well.
you set your mug down next to the fire and turned towards harry who's already watching you as you admire his blue eyes, bloodshot from barely sleeping last night, or the night before. you take his face in your hands and just hold him for a moment, feeling him lean into your touch as his eyes flutter close. "i love you, harry," you say just above a whisper, breaking the comfortable silence.
harry looks up at you, but his eyes are now full of lust. you barely have a moment to process what's going on before harry leans in for a gentle, wanting kiss.
harry's always so soft with you despite his clearly strong desire. you've never been with someone who wanted you so bad no matter how many times you've been with them. everything with harry was like the first time all over again; the same desperation and desire to please that just never left.
the kiss quickly gets heated as harry pulls his quarter zip off of you, making you both giggle at the fact that he just put it on you only a few minutes prior. your lips reconnect in a haste, not wanting even a single second away from each other.
harry lays you down on the rug beneath you as his hands make their way to your exposed legs, feeling the heat from the fire on your thighs. his shirt quickly comes off as well from you tugging at it. a moan escapes your lips just watching his body as he pulls the shirt over his head.
harry's suffered from many injuries in these last few years that have left him littered in scars. and while you obviously hate to think about harry in pain, something about his scars drove you crazy with lust. a brave boy who faced death and came back, now healing far away from the cruel world with you as his lover. it was just another reminder that you were safe, that he was finally safe.
harry smiles as he goes in to kiss you again, his hands going right back to your thighs as he pushes your nightdress above your panties. you're holding his face lovingly but harry pulls away from the kiss to look at you. he watches your expression intently as he starts sliding his fingers over your panties, earning a sigh of relief from you. harry's eyes grow darker the longer he teases you. he sits up to use his other hand to hold down your bucking hips, causing you to whine in frustration.
"patience," harry commands from you in a stern voice. you look up at him, jaw lax, breathing uneven, and simply give him a nod.
you love this side of harry. of course you fell in love with the soft, gentle, careful parts of him first, but over time you saw more and more of his angry, controlling, dominant side during sex that you were completely weak for.
living at hogwarts and then grimmauld place right after, most of your intimate moments with harry were kept quiet to avoid being heard. soft whispering, quiet moans, slow movements, and breathless orgasms under a heavy blanket with the lights dimmed. once you moved here, away from everything and everyone, things were different.
of course, you were both still a bit quiet and shy at first, not used to having a place all to your own where no one can hear you for miles. but, slowly, you and harry learned to break old habits and started experimenting together. a lot.
it seemed like neither of you could ever get enough of each other since coming here. you'd always been really attracted to each other, maybe more than the average couple, but something about being alone together in this corner of the world where the forest meets the ocean made you feel so connected, so in tune, and completely and utterly obsessed with each other.
it started with long, drawn-out, foreplay-heavy love making in your new bed to "break it in", sometimes spending hours each day just entangled together on top of the sheets, admiring the other's body and exploring every part. then it would slowly move over to the bath, naturally, after spending so much time sweating together in bed. after a while the sessions would get shorter as you would both be completely exhausted afterwards. instead, they increased in frequency.
either you or harry would find little opportunities to sneak in a quick fuck throughout the day between chores, or would give the other person head as they made dinner in the kitchen. it was thrilling. neither of you had ever been sexual outside of the bedroom/bathroom before, but you found it completely erotic.
you had yet to have sex in front of the fire, oddly enough, but you had thought about it quite a few times before. the warmth of the stove, the soft rug beneath you, the light on harry's skin, the sweat dripping off of him…
"[y/n]," harry said, snapping you out of your daze. "are you even listening to me?" he asks with a smirk.
you blush immediately, so lost in your thoughts about the sex you were just about to have that you couldn't even focus on what was currently happening…
"s-sorry…" you mumble. "you just drive me crazy," you admit shyly.
harry's hand pushes further into your hips, a groan crawling out of his throat as he glares at you. "don't make me cum already, darling," he growls, his voice deep and rumbling in his chest.
you whimper under his pressure, your back arching as your body attempts to find some kind of release from the growing tension inside of you.
"so fucking desperate already," harry says, clearly enjoying watching you struggle under his control. "if i could resist you even a little bit i would sit here and watch you struggle all day," he tells you as he leans into your neck, his teeth sinking into your skin. you wince and squeal, your heart racing from the pain.
harry smirks at your reaction. he sits up and releases the pressure on your hips, causing them to buck upwards instinctively. a pathetic "please," is all you're able to muster as you attempt to catch your breath.
normally harry wants to hear you do a lot more begging than that, but he's just as desperate as you are at this point and he can't resist you much longer.
harry props your legs up for him after helping you take off your panties, throwing them to the side as he lays between your thighs. you prop yourself up on your elbows to look down at harry who's hungrily looking between your eyes and your pussy. your breathing is rapid and shallow as your heart continues to thump in your chest. even after all these years and all the times you've seen harry between your legs you just never get used to the sight. he still gives you butterflies like a nervous girl with a crush.
your head rolls in pleasure as harry starts kissing your thighs; even in both of your desperate states, even when he's at his most dominant, he's still the gentle, loving harry you're so in love with.
harry's hands find your own and intertwine your fingers together as his tongue begins exploring your pussy. you can feel yourself getting even more wet as harry's mouth attaches itself to you, enjoying how you taste. moaning, whining, hips bucking onto harry's tongue, you start to feel yourself sweat from both the fire and harry's intense gaze up at you.
"f-fuck," you cry, your thighs instinctively squeezing around harry's head. he can't help but moan as he sucks on your clit, practically letting you ride his face.
you reach for your silky nightdress and lift it above your chest, exposing your nipples to the warmth of the fire as you continue watching harry make your legs tremble.
harry's eyes droop in pleasure. one of his hands grabs for your tits and the other applies the same pressure to your hips as before. you let out your first real moan above a whimper, your hips still trying to grind against harry's mouth as he continues pushing you further into the rug.
his tongue's now inside of you, teasing you as you clench around him, your thighs still quivering.
"harry, harry, please," you say breathlessly, begging for more. harry ignores you, instead only going slower to drive you mad. you groan in frustration. he looks back up at you for only a second, but you can see the smirk in his eyes.
his hand lets go of your tits before making its way to your thighs, pushing them away from his head as harry takes a moment to breathe. you're blushing, completely flustered, eyes half-open. "sorry," you apologize.
"don't be. give me more." harry demands.
his hand pushes further into your pelvis, his elbow holding down your thigh as you wince at the pressure.
harry's mouth returns to your clit as his fingers feel how wet you are for him. your body jolts at the sensation, but harry just holds you down tighter. starting with one finger, harry pushes inside you slowly as you writhe under his grasp. your hands get tangled in his hair again, desperately pulling his face further into your pussy.
harry just chuckles, looking up at you as he slowly pushes another finger inside you. you gasp, your grip in his hair tightening as your other hand plays with your tits. just the look in harry's eyes watching you chase your high is enough to bring you close to the edge.
harry's fingers were pumping in and out of your pussy, his lips and tongue still teasing your clit. your thighs threatened to close again, but harry kept them spread open for himself. "enough," he states, planting his elbows into your thighs and his hand against your pelvis. he glares up at you as he repositions himself. "stay."
you can feel your body react to the aggression in his voice. this is the hungriest, and hottest, side of harry you've ever seen. you're already brought back to the brink of orgasm as soon as you can see harry's fingers pumping inside you again, his wrist and forearm veins pronounced against the light of the fire as he picks up his speed.
the moans coming out of your mouth are filthy and involuntary, your mind going blank at the sudden rush of pleasure through your body. once harry's tongue begins circling your clit again, you don't have a chance at lasting much longer.
"i-i, harry, stop, i'm–" is all you're able to get out before your legs begin shaking, your head thrown back, crying out in overwhelming pleasure. it feels so good not having to hold back your moans anymore.
harry's lips detach from you, swollen, covered in your wetness. his fingers continue thrusting into you, gently now as you ride out your high. he slowly removes them after a moment, his hand and elbows relieving the pressure that kept you pinned to the ground.
you're still whining, your legs aching from struggling against harry's weight. they feel impossibly heavy as you try to bend your knees up. harry just watches you, enjoying the aftermath of his work.
you're still seeing stars by the time harry's pants have come off, his cock barely peeking through the front of his boxers. he starts rubbing himself through the fabric, his breathing becoming labored as you watched him in a daze.
you look up at him innocently through your eyelashes, your mouth slightly ajar as you lean your weight to one elbow, using the other hand to take his place. he lets you take over, slowly stroking his erection through his boxers, enjoying his gaze down at you from above. his hand goes to your cheek, softly tracing the curve of your smile.
his fingers delicately open your lips before roughly shoving them into your mouth. you make a surprised noise, but quickly begin sucking and licking his fingers. he pulls his boxers down with the other hand, and uses your spit to lube himself up. you lick your own fingers and do the same, helping guide his cock into you with a groan of both pleasure and discomfort.
harry gradually thrusts into you, letting you adjust to him, taking his time with you. he watches your aching pussy welcome his cock eagerly, your legs already starting to tremble from the pressure building inside you again. "oh, fuck," harry's voice cracks, his hands gripping your thighs as they continue to involuntarily shake.
a hand flies to your mouth, barely able to contain yourself already. seeing harry's face of relief as his cock slides all the way inside you only makes you clench around him tighter. he lets out a struggled breath, his grip on your thighs only tightening as he spread them open for himself again.
harry's eyes are closed in bliss, his thrusts slow but deep, forcing a whine from your throat each time he's completely inside you. he's starting to sweat, his hair hanging loosely around his forehead, arms flexed to keep his grip on you, his body leaning down into yours as he starts picking up his pace.
harry looks down at you. one of his hands grabs the hand covering your mouth. "let me hear you, angel," he speaks gently but his voice is hungry, immediately earning a soft moan from your lips. he smiles, leaning down to kiss you sloppily.
harry takes this time to really pick up his speed, adjusting his position to roughly thrust himself into your throbbing pussy. his hands grab for the back of your knees, forcing your legs to bend back as he only pushes himself into you more.
"oh my god," you gasp into harry's kiss, your hands wrapping around his shoulders to steady yourself. harry's forehead rests against yours, looking down, glasses fogged up from the heavy breathing and heat from the fire. he's watching himself from your angle, slowing down his thrusting to a torturous pace. you both groan at the feeling and sight of harry pushing his cock completely inside you and slowly pulling back out before thrusting into you again.
"fuck, baby, you take my cock so well, feel so fucking good," harry says breathlessly into your ear.  your nails dig into his shoulders as you try not to cum again already just from harry's voice. you're both sweating, faces pressed together, the fire slightly dying beside you but still creating a warm glow.
"y-you're, mmph, i'm so close, again," you cry, letting yourself rest back on the soft rug. you feel so at peace despite the growing tension in your stomach – watching harry prop himself up with one hand on the ground beside you and the other still holding your leg back, his chest heaving as he continues thrusting inside you with a growing pace.
harry looks at your twisted expression, eyes glossed over and cheeks flushed, your tits bouncing as he roughly uses your body for his pleasure.
"yeah?" harry looks at you, his grip on your leg tightening as he fucks you roughy into the rug. "fucking cum for me," he commands from you.
you barely need his permission before you're already over the edge, legs uncontrollably shaking, eyes rolling back, incoherent words getting lost in your broken moans and cries of pain.
it's all harry needs before he feels himself release inside you, still thrusting into you slowly as his cum spills out of your pussy.
your body is shaking from the sensation, your legs still vibrating as you clench around harry's cock. he struggled to finally pull out of you.
still trying to catch his breath, harry lovingly rubs your thighs as he watches your swollen pussy ache for the feeling of his cock again.
"so fucking beautiful, my love," harry sighs, relaxing his body on top of yours, his head in your neck. "my beautiful, beautiful girl," he repeats, covering you in kisses as he showers you with compliments.
you just giggle at him, exhausted, trying to come back down to earth.
"i can't…move," you mumble between breaths, your eyes drooping closed as your feet touch back down on the rug. you feel even more weak than before.
harry hums, kissing your forehead. "it's okay, i've got you, darling," he says with a warm smile.
he stands up, slowly, but isn't in as much pain as he expected. his knees are sore for sure, but otherwise, he couldn't feel better.
he leans down to help you sit up, guiding your body into his arms as he picks you up bridal style, your head resting in his chest. you giggle again but you're too weak to reject the gesture. he carefully carries you to the bathroom just down the hall from the living room.
harry runs you both a warm bath as you watch from the counter. he's still naked, as are you, but it's not awkward or sexual – it's just natural.
he shuts the water off and reaches for you once again. "i'm okay now," you insist, standing from the counter and steadying yourself with his hands. he still helps you walk to the tub before helping you climb inside. the water's extremely hot, but it feels so nice on your sweaty, aching skin.
"i'll be right back, gotta feed the fire, just wait for me, yeah?" harry says before he dips out of the bathroom.
looking around you as you warm the rest of your body with the water, you notice the candles sitting around the tub from the last time you both took a bath together. just the flash of the memory through your brain is enough to make your stomach twist into knots again. harry had you bent over the side of the tub as water splashed everywhere, the feeling of freedom and carelessness intoxicating you both as you cared about nothing but each other's highs.
with a flick of your wet hand, you light all the candles again, and the room is lit with a warm glow. it's not often you use magic anymore, harry prefers to do things manually now that you're both caring for a piece of land, but the convenience of certain spells are too useful to forget completely.
walking back in, harry smirks at all the candles being lit. he admires you for a moment, naked, sweaty, half submerged in the huge clawfoot bathtub surrounded by the glow of the candles. "trying to insinuate something, love?" harry asks, closing the bathroom door behind him.
you blush, curling your knees into your chest. "just thought it'd be nice to have some light," you say softly.
harry grabs you both towels and sets them next to the tub before climbing in himself. he positions himself behind you, holding your body as he guides you to relax into his chest. once you laid your head back, you and harry sat in comfortable, warm silence for a long while.
it takes a few minutes before harry's hands begin rubbing at your stomach, slowly, making ripples throughout the water as you lower your knees, letting harry comfort you. he's humming softly, your head rumbling in his chest. he rests his head next to your own and watches his hands from your perspective.
his rubbing gets further and further down your stomach, running his hands along your waist and hips before finally grabbing at your inner thighs roughly. you let out a pathetic whimper, watching his hands from above the water.
"is it bad that i already need you again?" harry chuckles, half joking but half already turned on. you shake your head quickly, your hips thrusting up for relief, moaning at his words. "no, need you, please," you respond desperately, looking over at him.
harry's eyes are darker once more, watching as his hands gradually move to your sensitive pussy. you groan in response, but harry quickly kisses you to cover it. "i know, baby, just let me take care of it," he says into your lips.
slowly circling your clit with soft fingers, harry watches as your eyes droop more and more from the building pleasure. eventually his fingers are back inside of you, gently pumping in and out. his head turns back to your body as he watches you react to him. his other hand goes for your tits, grabbing one roughly from just above the surface of the water.
while it feels good being teased you're insanely desperate for harry once again. your hand reaches behind you, feeling harry's growing erection against your back. harry's grip on you tightens as your hand starts stroking his cock slowly under the water.
"fucking dirty girl," he groans under his breath, taking his fingers out of your pussy to continue rubbing your clit. you cry out at the loss of feeling, your hand squeezing around harry as he just enjoys the feeling.
soon, harry's moved your hips to align with his, your arms holding your body up on either side of the tub as you slowly insert harry back inside your pussy once again. the familiar feeling is only enhanced by being underwater, his cock sliding in and out of you with ease as you adjust to the feeling.
"oh my god," you sigh, your stomach already tightening, thighs still a bit shaky. harry's guiding your hips expertly, groaning in pleasure watching your ass dip in and out of the water onto his lap. his head is resting against the edge of the tub, mind blank, solely focused on your pleasure and his.
"fuck, harry," you whimper again, rolling your hips around on his cock before thrusting it inside you again. harry wishes you could see just how sexy you look from this angle, your hair flowing down your back, your skin glistening in the candlelight, the water droplets running down your hips, it's enough to make him resist the urge to finish already.
"you're so perfect," harry groans. he smacks your ass, slapping the water with it, causing you to squeal and quicken your pace. the same filthy moans are still spilling from your mouth, hardly able to contain yourself in this situation. something about using the time meant to help each other clean up to only continue fucking makes you feel so dirty, so used, and it's driving you crazy.
harry suddenly stops you, much to your disappointment, and tells you to trust him. "just get out and stand up," he says.
you do as he says, and eventually harry has you bent over the bathroom counter, barely lit by the candles behind you. he slowly returns his cock inside of you, your bodies dripping water everywhere.
as harry's thrusts become more consistent, one hand grabs for your shoulder and the other for your damp hair. he forces your face to look in the mirror, your eyes barely open from the pleasure. "watch," he commands. your eyes shot open at his voice, tracing the shape of your shadows in the mirror in front of your face.
harry loses himself in you, his head rolling back in pleasure hearing you struggle to take his cock for a second time. you're trying to moan, say anything at all, but your voice is incomprehensible as harry only becomes rougher with you.
"god damn it, [y/n]," harry spits out, his voice clearly exhausted. his hands travel back to your tits, pulling you back up into him as he continues pounding into you from behind. you're a mess in his hands as they roughly grope your tits.
"look at you," harry growls into your neck, looking into the mirror just in front of you as his gaze meets yours. "so fucking sexy,"
your hands desperately grip the edge of the counter for balance, your legs getting more and more weak by the second. harry pushes you further over the counter, his moans becoming urgent.
"i'm gonna fill you up because you're fucking mine, yeah? look at this perfect body of yours," harry's voice strains, his sweaty chest against your back as he forces you to continue watching yourself get pounded in the mirror, one arm over your chest and the other holding your hips. the light of the candles is just enough to let you see harry's dark expression. "fucking perfect, just for me,"
you haven't been able to get a single word out, your mind spinning as harry only gets more and more desperate, his pace getting sloppy.
"fuck, baby, just be good for me and let me cum inside your tight little pussy, hm? let me show you what's mine,"
you're already starting to cum just from harry's words. the overwhelming pleasure racks your body harshly as harry continues to use you for himself. shaking, barely able to stand without his help, your voice is breaking as you cry out in ecstasy for the third time just this morning.
harry's barely able to last much longer. his thrusts have slowed to uneven, jerky motion as he feels his cum spilling deep inside you. breathy moans and aching bodies, harry rests against you with your body limp against the counter. he lifts his head from your neck to kiss your skin softly, everywhere, slowly helping guide you back to the tub for a second time. your legs are weaker than before and you're barely able to contribute as harry leans you into the water, still kissing your damp skin.
"i love you, i love you," he's mumbling between kisses.
you're too weak and dizzy to respond in any way, still trying to catch your breath as harry begins cleaning your skin. he rubs a soft rag along your chest, neck, back, shoulders, and arms. the whole time he's complimenting you lovingly, a gentle touch and warm gaze upon your tired face.
after washing himself, harry also dries you off, carrying you back to bed before getting you both dressed in comfortable, warm pajamas. "just rest for today, my love," he told you as he laid you down. you reach for his hands. "stay?"
harry smiles. you didn't have to ask, it was literally his bed too, but he admires how soft and innocent you are in this moment. though he loves to be rough with you like he just was, there's nothing more special in the world to him than the gentleness between you two. his whole life has been nothing but challenges, setbacks, problems, and you're everything but. he just wants to be soft and gentle with you.
harry climbs under the sheets, his body also succumbing to the ache and exhaustion. he wraps himself around you, already falling asleep against his chest. harry joins not long after, finally getting his much needed sleep without the threat of his nightmares.
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a few weeks later it's just a bit warmer out than it has been, so you and harry immediately started the day doing outdoor chores while you could. harry was chopping wood as you cleaned up around the cottage garden. it was too cold most of the year to grow much of anything out of it, but you still liked to keep it manageable for the smaller animals that stopped by to look around.
you also took the time to admire harry, shirtless, sweaty, groaning each time he drops the ax into another cut of firewood. his body had become well built from all the manual labor he's been doing lately, carrying entire trunks or stumps of trees out of the forest, lifting heavy bags of mulch and dirt for you, digging out the flower bed around the cottage, he was more muscular and toned than you'd ever seen him. it never mattered what harry's body looked like to you, you always found him attractive no matter what, but you couldn't deny that his toned back and broad shoulders got you more worked up than usual lately.
it was nice getting to work on the home with each other, a comfortable silence filling the day broken by the occasional question, favor, kiss, or compliment. it was peaceful, this routine you both had, and it felt so natural to work with each other. you hardly had to communicate your ideas because you were often thinking the same things.
tea in the morning, chores once the sun is out, taking a dip in the ocean at sunset, and having a warm home cooked dinner in the dark, the cottage lit from within from candles and the fireplace. it was perfect. for both of you.
and, of course, the sex had never slowed down as well.
you had both joked at the beginning of your move that you didn't think you could ever stop yourselves now that you were isolated from the world, but that's exactly what ended up happening. neither of your desires could be relieved no matter how many times you tried. not that you wanted them to go away by any means, it was just overwhelming, the feral need to spend hours each day pleasuring each other in every way possible. it was always passionate and desperate for more, never becoming repetitive or any less exciting. it was exactly what you both needed and wanted all the time.
as the sun was setting for the day, you and harry sat together and shared an orange you had gotten at the market just a few miles away earlier that week. you were lucky to be close enough to something that offered fresh produce, even in the colder parts of the year. harry watched the waves crashing against the sand, his knees to his chest as you both steady yourself on a large rock between the cottage and the water.
"thank you," harry says softly. you look over at him, his hands now empty as he's swallowing the last of his orange slices. you finish yours as well. "of course," you respond.
harry shakes his head. "no. really. thank you, [y/n], for everything." he says, still watching the sea. you blush, giving him a soft smile before turning to watch it as well. "i'm finally, really, truly happy. for the first time in my life, i feel at peace." harry explains, still speaking softly just over the crashing waves.
you could cry just from harry's words. all you've ever wanted was for him to feel safe. he's had such a difficult start in life and didn't deserve what happened to him, or what he was forced to do. he deserved simplicity. a normal life in a normal home doing normal chores. he deserved to be happy.
overcome with love, you stand from the rock and grab harry's hand, pulling him with you. he silently follows you down the beach. once you're a few yards away from the shore, you pull down the straps of the dress you had been working in off your shoulders, letting the material slide right off your body and onto the sand as you continue heading towards the water.
you turn to look at harry, and he's stunned at how beautiful you are. the shape of your body against the warm sunset over the water, nothing but a pair of panties covering your sweaty skin. your hair was flowing in the salty breeze of the ocean, hands reaching for his as your feet began to touch the water.
harry's ripped and dirty blue jeans come off as well as his glasses, leaving them behind on the sand as he grabs for your hand. you walk into the water together, slightly shivering from the lingering chill beneath the warm surface, but quickly adjusting to the temperature. harry's only admiring you, like he always does, as you dip your head under the water and come up, pushing the hair out of your face.
harry does the same, wiping his face of the sweat and dirt that's collected over the work day with the salty water. this has become one of his favorite parts of your routine together, cooling off in the ocean after a long day. not just to wash off the sweat and stress of the day, but also to admire you in all your glory under the shining sun.
harry wastes no time reaching for you, pulling you into him as you float in his grasp. he holds you for a moment, mesmerized by the light in your eyes, a smile permanently fixed on his face. "my beautiful girl," he reminds you, his forehead leaning against yours. you hum, reaching your hands to his neck as you pull him in for a heated kiss.
you've had sex in the ocean a few times now, and it's quickly become one of your favorites. it's the ultimate form of freedom being naked together making love in the gentle waves, harry holding you around his waist as he hugs your body into his.
most nights you're both too tired from working to go further than sloppy making out and feeling each other up; but other nights, like tonight, you're both too desperate to care if it hurts.
as harry continues kissing you he carries you back to the shore, your legs still around his waist as he lays you down onto the sand. the water just barely washes over harry's legs as it meets the shoreline. you relax into the warm sand beneath you, harry already pulling your panties off. you giggle at his eagerness. he smirks, his hands gripping your waist hungrily.
you can see harry's erection through his soaking wet boxers barely hanging off his hips. just as eagerly, you pull them down for him as he kicks them to the side.
harry easily slides his cock inside of you, letting out a struggled sigh of relief at the feeling. no matter what's going on around him, harry will always feel perfectly in place when he's inside of you.
your hands are tangled in his wet hair, gripping tighter as he bottoms out. he moans desperately, leaning in for another kiss. his pace evens out to a familiar rhythm, your body wrapping around him as he fucks you into the wet sand. the warm sunset is perfectly met with the chilly breeze of the water that's still waving over both of you gently. each time it gives you shivers, your body arching into harry's from the shocking feeling.
harry's not sure if he's ever wanted to finish this quickly before. it was so perfect, this moment, the sun, the waves, you. he just couldn't believe this was his life. making love to the most beautiful girl in the world where the land meets the sea. he never thought life could be this simple and beautiful, but with you it was effortless.
he pulled away from the kiss to simply look at you, eyes drooping, cheeks blushing, eyebrows pinched together in desperation. he smiled. "i love you," he says so simply, his thrusts beginning to stutter against you. you smile back, eyes still half open. "love you, harry, so much," you manage to say between heavy breaths.
you pull him back in for a kiss, and feel his body weaken on top of you, leaning on his elbows for support in the uneven sand. "baby, baby," he tries to warn you, but you just continue kissing him and wrap your legs back around his waist, pulling him deeper into your pussy.
he completely unravels, pumping his cum inside you as he cries against your lips. "fuck," he keeps groaning in a broken voice. you can feel yourself letting go as well, your thighs squeezing around harry's waist as the water crashes into your body again, making you shake even more.
you both enjoy the moments after your climaxes together, letting the water continue to run over you as the sun's light falls below the horizon. harry, still inside you, his body resting on top of yours, tells you he loves you in the softest, sleepiest voice he can manage.
you kiss his head, reminding him how much you love him.
you both eventually sit up, covered in sand, and chuckle to each other about it. harry invites you back into the water where he washes you off, giving you a loving kiss under the dim sky.
he continues holding you there in the gentle waves, the emerging stars lighting the sky above you. he's a bit cold now, but he couldn't be more warm inside. harry just loves you and the little life you've built with him here on the sea. he feels happy, loved, and completely at peace in the ocean with you in his arms.
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gay-dorito-dust · 23 days
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Can you do angst of ford x reader, where reader was Fords assistant and instead of Stanley pushing ford in, reader does while being possessed by bill.
Stanley is still there and they work hard to repair the portal but when Ford does get back he's really upset at reader because he still thinks that they themselves pushed him in and betrayed him. Ford won't let reader explain themselves, he just tells them to "get out his house"
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Part 2 is right here
You didn’t want this.
Then again you weren’t the one to push him, Bill was after tricking you into making a deal with him. You should’ve known better than to put any amount of trust in that chaotic dream demon.
You screamed and shouted for either Ford or Stanley to notice the weirdness in your behaviour, the weirdly inhuman smile that spread across your face, anything as you were forced to watch yourself shove Ford into the portal.
‘BILL!’ You screamed but the demon possessing you acted as though he couldn’t hear you as he relinquished control of your body and let you back in it, just so that the last thing you saw of your dear friend was the look of betrayal upon his face as he disappeared into the portal forever.
‘FORD! No! IM SORRY! IM SO SORRY! IT WASNT ME!’ But Ford couldn’t hear you. He was gone thanks to bill you and you knew they no one would ever believe if you were to tell anyone that a demon did the deed. All they saw was what looked like you but not you in any other aspect that counted; However the fact that you were seen doing the crime was enough to fuel their biases against you regardless, fuelled but their needed to be right in everything, and it was difficult to change a persons mind once it’s made up.
‘It wasn’t me…’ you softly murmured to yourself as you collapsed on the floor of the laboratory as a seething Stanley stood behind you.
‘You pushed my brother.’ He snarled. ‘I saw you.’
You only stayed silent, it was better the beer the brunt of the blame then look like a madman trying to plead as to why they wasn’t true, and besides he wouldn’t believe you even if you did manage to make Bill confess before an audience that he had been the one to push Ford while possessed as you. The demonic bastard was far gone now, cackling at the ridicule you were receiving for his actions.
Stanley, not liking that you were silent, pulled you to face him by the collar of your shirt but before he could berate you further, he caught sight of your defeated face and tear stricken cheeks. ‘Go on, blame me because you would be believe me if I were to tell the truth.’ You said with a voice void of emotion. ‘Blame me all you want but I’m the only person who can help you get the portal up and running again. I’m willing to do so but not for you, but for Ford and in hopes of explaining myself to him and pray that he believes me.’ You add and without warning Stanley drops you on your arse and says in a voice equally devoid of emotion;
‘He’ll never believe you, he’s not that stupid.’
And after that interaction you and Stanley spent the next thirty years of your lives together rebuilding the portal, while Stan still blamed you for pushing his brother into the portal, he’s become more lenient as and when he would remind you of the reason you were doing this in the first place; more specifically during arguments after failed test runs of getting the portal open where he’d say to you in the best of the moment:
‘If it wasn’t for you my brother would still be here!’ Before storming upstairs while you remained in the lab, wasting away the midnight oil because you didn’t believe you deserved sleep after all that. You had grown numb to being Stan’s verbal punching bag, and would often times ignore his attempts to forget what happened and make peace with you, for you knew it wasn’t genuine because after you get his brother back you were more then likely to be kicked out of the shack for you had served your purpose for your crime.
So the relationship between yourself and Stan was never good and you tended to only act civil in the presence of Dipper and Mabel, two kids whom you have grown rather fond of during their stay. You remembered the first night they came here and were in high debate on whether they should stay with Stan or leave, you were quick to intervene and said;
‘Your Grunkle Stan is a wonderful man with a big heart despite his rough exterior. So please give him a chance instead of letting first impressions sway your thinking, you’ll be surprised as a result if you do and besides life is meant to be lived without regrets.’
You were literally the reason they decided to give Stan a chance and stay, but you knew you were never going to get that thank you from him, you were the person who pushed his brother into the portal remember? So you just carried on building the portal with him in awkward silence until the day finally came.
The day that Ford came home.
The day should’ve made you happy, ecstatic even but you knew that wouldn’t be the case for you as the moment Ford came out of the portal your blood ran cold.
He was glaring.
He was glaring at you with such a silent rage that you swore that you could’ve been killed by a state like that. But it was also a stare that told you of the damage your betrayal had caused him, he would never forgive you and that was your biggest fear this entire time, a fear that Stan knew and now it was proven true.
‘Ford-‘
‘Stop.’ He told you, breaking your heart. ‘I don’t want to hear your excuse.’
‘But-‘ you tried again.
‘I said no!’ Ford roared as everyone held their breath, even Stanley who had never heard his brother shout, in that moment he actually felt some remorse for you, some.
‘You’re the reason I was trapped in that portal for THRITY YEARS!’ Dipper and Mabel gasped as they too were now looking at you with hurt in their eyes, which made tears appear in the corner of your own.
‘Is it true Grunkle/graunt y/n?’ Mabel asked as dipper glared at you while keeping his sister as far away from you as he could.
‘No Mabel I-‘ you tried to take a step towards her but Ford was quick to cut you off and level you with a glare. ‘Stay away from my grand niece and nephew.’ He growled and you knew there was no point looking back at Stanley, who had kept uncharacteristically quite this entire time.
‘It’s wasn’t me-‘
‘Then who was it who pushed me then y/n?’ Ford asked.
You remained as silent as the day you let Stanley accused you of the same thing. There was no point in making your case when everyone’s minds have been made up, you were the monster in their story and now they were going to be rid of you once and for all.
‘Who?’ Ford asked again as he seethed, his eyes searching your dead ones for answers that have been in his mind for the past thirty years. You were his friend, he thought he could trust you but he guessed wrong, and now he couldn’t look you in the eyes without seeing the very person who shoved him in the portal with a sicken smile across their face.
Ford couldn’t trust you in the presence of Dipper and Mabel, no one was safe with you as far as he was concerned and he wanted to keep his family safe, even if it meant being rid of you once and for all.
When you didn’t say anything to save yourself, Ford points upwards. ‘Get out of my house, I don’t want to see you ever again. You’ve already done enough damage to this family as there is.’
You didn’t have the energy nor fight left in you to scream, shout or anything, you just swallowed the lump in your throat and moved out of the lab as Mabel and Stanley looked at you sympathetically; whereas Ford and dipper only glared at your retreating back.
‘Grunkle/ graunt y/n?’ Mabel called out to you weakly. You only shot her a small smile and mouthed ‘I’m sorry.’ She was always your favourite twin but it was time to say good bye and without another word, you pulled off the bracelet that Mable had made for you and threw it on the floor in front of her.
Mabel looked at the bracelet, then back up at you. ‘I made this for you.’ She tells you with tears in her eyes.
‘You deserve better than to put your trust in me my sweet shooting star, I’m a monster in your grunkles eyes,’ you shot a look towards Stan and Ford who were still staring before looking back at Mable, ‘It’s best that you start seeing me that way too because I only cause pain apparently to some.’ You replied and with that you left the shack and the pines family behind, venturing off into the pathway through the woods with nothing but a hole where you here should’ve been.
There was no point fighting your case to Ford, he wasn’t going to hear it, for he was no batter than everyone else and he just pointed the finger at you without second thought. So much for him being unique when he was just like the rest of them, so much like the rest of them that you find it almost laughable.
You’ll gladly stay out of his life, for whatever Stanford pines wished for, you’ll happily oblige as you were only ever the assistant that betrayed him in the end; a traitor.
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