#this is *mostly* a shitpost

[misscammiedawn]

Sometimes I get lazy and just rely on triggers and tricks to hypnotize a partner.

Oh... I know... sometimes it can feel so good to have a slow and intentional induction where I gently guide you down and let you just surrender to a blissful state of calm and comfortable reverie. I do so enjoy watching the way a wonderful trance partner's expression slowly dips and their muscles go slack and they just let gravity take over... the way that every single word impacts them more and more and they let go and become open and empty and blank for me.

Yes, the slow and gradual descent into trance is actually quite lovely. Why would I deprive myself of such a treat just because I don't wish to put in any effort?

...hmm...

Hypnotize yourself for me.

Oh I am deadly serious. Speak the words, watch my eyes, take yourself into a gradual state of trance. Don't rush it. Savor every moment of serene submission. Maybe I'll even be nice enough to add a few words of encouragement in there. "That's right", "You're doing so well", "Going so deep aren't you?"

Go ahead. I'll just sit back and watch as you start to slip and stumble through your words. As you start to sag and slur. As your words start to become gentle and docile and tame.

I'll be watching closely. So make it entertaining for me, my dear.

[communistcephalopod]

🌊 lugias-sopping-anus

Can't stand how people will learn that humans are related to Pokemon and somehow come to the conclusion that different people are different types. That's not how this works. That's not how any of this works.

🍑 pechaberrysoda

there are literally so many fighting type people what are you even talking about lmao

🌊 lugias-sopping-anus

Your genetic make up doesn't just magically change type because you took a karate class. Do you also think your Charizard is a Grass type now because it learnt Solar Beam?

✨ ace-trainer-luna

But aren't Psychic type people a thing? Some humans have telekinetic powers, I'm pretty sure there are a few gym leaders who have them. There are even rare cases of children born with psychic abilities.

🌸 cynthiasfuturewife

that's still just learning moves

🌌 mistyterrain

As an actual Psychic type, this post is really disheartening to see. The fact that people who still refuse to acknowledge the existence of psychics are so common is just shocking. We exist!

☣ deathtounova

no one's refusing to acknowledge the existence of shit, you just don't know how types work

🌌 mistyterrain

The sheer ignorance on display here, it's obvious you're just mad you're a normal type lol.

☣ deathtounova

how bout i karate chop your ass and we'll see how "not very effective" it is

🌌 mistyterrain

Typical physical attacker brutishness, resorting to violence as usual

🦧 return-to-mankey

didn't you claim you manifested the kyogre disaster in hoenn?

⚡ electrictypesfuckyeah

WHAT

🥀 cradilyzone

Actual professor here! Genetically, all humans are Normal types, though some of our relatively recent ancestors were Psychic. Part of what let us succeed as a species was reutilizing the brain power originally used for psionics to language and tool use. We do still have some vestigial psychic power that can be trained, though it's quite weak compared to most Pokémon. As for those born with psychic powers, this is considered nowadays to be like an egg move, passed down from parent to child. And no, obviously learning Fighting moves doesn't make you a Fighting type, there is no way for a human to change their type.

🌔 hexmaniac

my grandma became a ghost type

🔶️ bigjiggly

I-

🔞 mega-miltank

What about swimmers though, they're water type, right?

📀 HM-69

did you even read the post

🪴 n-did-nothing_wrong

Are we all just ignoring OP's url?

🌊 lugias-sopping-anus

Team Plasma apologist blog, opinion discarded.

🛗 mostlymukposts

This post single handedly evolved my Porygon-2

[wojtekaneko]

That's how it went

[tubbytarchia]

Good job Joel

[r-aindr0p]

Another cooking event, yippee !!

I love Jamil just outright refusing to eat the food and then you have Kalim suffering in silence and eating because he's too nice

[s1lly-gh02tz]

This was revealed to me in a vision

[hydrossity-zone]

abbul

[levia-san]

I suddenly remembered this photo of a cardboard cut out of an idol (?) and there were obvious bitemarks on its neck... so given kim com's canonical popularity, I think YJH should also-

Also no one is gonna believe you when you tell them the culprit.

[aromanthur-lester]

I understand why every companion decides to travel with the Doctor on a whim because I, too, if faced with the option to pay rent in London or the option to live in a police box rent-free, would choose the second one.

[bklily]

Oh, so now suddenly EVERYONE thinks Rook is hot. I see how it is. I am watching you.

[notcreative360]

Mammon: *Finds Barbatos laying down on the sofa, with a blanket on* What the fu-

MC: He found a rat in the kitchen, and came here to crash for the night without even asking..

Mammon: And you're just gonna let him!?

MC: Yes.

[pokeypoqi]

this is the end of episode 7 in my stupid and idiot mind

[somewhatsentientspellbook]

a pattern is a pattern ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[det2x-fanfic-dump]

If I ever write a retelling of the Twst Masquerade event, This is how it will go..Thank you Rollo for giving me inspiration~!

I named my MC Yuki for these things.

When everyone sees Rollo for the first time:

Azul: //quickly covers Yuki's eyes// don't look into his eyes Yuki! We shall not let your white hair and droopy eyes harem increase anymore.

Yuki: my what?

Ruggie: my eyes look droopy but I'm not white haired...

Malleus: I'm part of the harem and my hair isn't white nor have droopy eyes.

Deuce: Same...

Silver: I'm both white haired and sleepy but I don't think I can be romantically involved with the prefect with Malleus-sama around.

Riddle: But you don't look sleepy nor lazy Azul...

Azul: I have my sleepless nights...

Rollo: //bombastic side eyes and covers mouth looking disgusted or slightly offended//

[violent138]

Something I personally would find funny is Oliver Queen also deciding to go the stupid billionaire route and he and Brucie only meet occasionally at events, given their geographical distribution, but once they do, they both set their sights on the same targets for their crazy (ex. rushing a stack of champagne glasses) and end up interfering with each other, toppling each other down, messing up their respective flirting attempts, drive Lex Luthor to contemplate strangling them in public, and somehow also manage to amplify each other's crazy acts (sometimes like dominoes, usually on purpose) until it becomes an unspoken rule never to have them at the same event.

[r-aindr0p]

Hopefully Rollo isn't too mad about his robes being stolen.

This is how Iimagine it probably went when he finally arrived at NRC, still in his pajamas like a madman that escaped the hospital

Yuu will not elaborate on the mini Rollos

(Post and ask related to the last pic of this shitpost I made almost a year ago and decided to not draw Rollo in his uniform robes until I get him during the rerun)