with every passing day, being middle eastern is realizing more and more just how many people do not view you as a person whose right to life and happiness should also be protected.
im so glad to see the support for palestine in these past few weeks like never before, but i hope it isnt the case again of a short period of loud noise from the world then silence just because they get tired. ive seen that all too many times as an iranian american, and its frustrating since we cannot so easily move on from these atrocities the way others can; we are trapped.
i truly hope the world continues to put on more and more pressure until palestine is free. do not grow tired; do not grow silent. everyone should know and remember exactly what palestinians have endured and are continuing to endure for almost a century. everyone should know and remember well what has not been stopped by the inhumans who walk among us. it is the bare minimum.
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What's great about the youngins who keep saying people 30+ shouldn't be in fandom is that we all get to sit back, relax and watch as the slow march of time eventually catches up to them and they too soon will be in their 30s until the cold hand of death lays its gnarled, leathery fingers upon their shoulder.
You bite the hand that feeds you young one. Who do you think created all that fandom space? And all those fics you devour?
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No but something I love is how fucking loyal Miklan really is (in Hopes specifically since we don't have enough information in Houses).
At the camp, he takes his job seriously. Very seriously. He doesn't act begrudging or like he's just doing anything by force. As the chapters go on he not only goes from relatively aloof to a full fledged commander (which is great development in that span of chapters btw considering how fast the story has to progress) and one who fights for Faerghus because he wants to (why would he reassure the player that he's going to, literally, hold down the fort? Why doesn't he flee when his life is in immediate danger despite that Dimtiri prefers his allies to flee and save their lives over sacrificing themselves? Why does he like helping citizens who had their lands destroyed by the war, despite being a bandit who used to plunge towns just like those?).
At any time when the Empire was attacking, he could've surrendered and even joined their side because of not liking Faerghus and its people... if he didn't like Faerghus and its people. Also, someone brought this up to me once that Miklan likely has family in the Empire still, because his mother was from the Empire. He had a perfectly good out that wouldn't even necessarily be considered treason to Faerghus, i.e. surrendering and going to the Empire to protect that side of his family.
He doesn't. He dies for Faerghus. It was both a matter of honor due to the fact that he was finally living the life he always should've been and wanted to be respected for that, and also his loyalty that followed in the past's wrongs being righted. No matter what you think of Miklan post disinheritance, he was the heir who was removed because he didn't have a Crest. All over just that, despite that Sylvain having a Crest never meant they didn't still have someone capable of fighting off Sreng invasions.
They had someone able to wield the Lance of Ruin, so why did it matter if he was officially the heir? Miklan felt like his life was stolen from him (and I'm not saying what he did to Sylvain was okay either). Dimitri gave him all of that back and he started to become loyal to Faerghus and its king because Dimitri was giving the chance even the man's own father never gave him from the moment Sylvain was determined to have a Crest.
What happened in his life before Dimitri had him brought to him as soon as he became king is, in a way, almost like it never happened as far as Miklan's behavior. It was obviously there at first, but over time it's like it never happened. That is, if someone met him and didn't know about his past, by chapter 9 they'd never even know he'd had that history. He was the person he would've been years ago if he hadn't been disinherited, which led to the mess that led to him being disowned (and he says he just "left", but Matthias doesn't mince facts. At all. If that had been the case he wouldn't just say he disowned him. He would admit Miklan ran away. That means Miklan claims he left as a means of coping and trying to convince other people that it was his choice and not forced on him).
Miklan became a lot more loyal than he's ever given credit for, both in the game and in the fandom. Gwendal did recognize it, but that's about all we're given.
Gwendal corrected himself when Miklan died, referring to him instead as Sir Miklan instead of the insults he was spewing during their fight which were very clearly pissing Miklan off; but Miklan kept fighting and defending the fort, not just because he wanted to prove Gwendal wrong but because he was here because he was pulled out of his life as a bandit. The people he was defending the fort for were the people who effectively gave him his life back.
Basically, he would've been there in that fort defending it anyway if he had lived the life he should have to begin with. If his value was acknowledged all along, he would've been defending the most important fort in Faerghus all along (if this exact scenario occurred and everything was the same except him being disowned in the first place). He would be there being the commander and fighter he was supposed to be.
Mind you, it was the king himself who gave him that chance, meaning the person who reigns over Faerghus and has the most power to change whatever the hell he wants - including how people with Crests and without are treated. Miklan was part of a fight to better their society and be part of the new generation taking over. Nobody could truly change things unless the king - the top power - had the thought to change them (not saying Lambert thought the political climate was good the way it was, but he clearly had other priorities and it didn't seem to be something weighing on his mind. He may not have even truly noticed the problems and power discrepancies because he was so focused on other things).
However, the moment the king thought to change all that old stuff, Miklan was one of the first people who came to mind, and one of the first people he took action regarding, to integrate into his new army (and he even mentioned completely rearranging his army and whatnot, and then we find out he had Miklan located basically right after becoming king. We had a two year timeskip and Miklan had been there for those two years because of how soon after Dimitri was crowned that he had decided to bring Miklan back and give him another chance).
If the king sought to change things and was taking active action to prove it, that was something Miklan could see and realize was actually going to happen. It wasn't a blind trust - he could see Dimitri was actually doing it. He had a reason to be able to trust him with this.
He was also able to trust the people who were watching over him, i.e. the people Dimitri had making sure he didn't revert back to any sort of banditry. Those people could have easily faked it, made up that he did something and that they had killed him on the spot. Dimitri trusted those people not to do that of course, but those people were not told to bring him to Dimitri if he did anything. They were told to apprehend him and kill him immediately (which is reasonable, given what he'd done in the past, and they wouldn't want to try to wait to get Dimitri over to wherever they were. If Miklan escaped in that time, they'd just have a big problem on their hands).
So that is to say, those people could've just faked it at any point and killed him. They didn't. They, like Dimitri, were willing to give him another chance provided he didn't do anything bad.
The same goes for Felix and everyone else who had qualms about him being allowed into their army. Dimitri explicitly stated if anyone had issues with his appointment as a commander to "by all means" kill him themselves. He literally made it an open option for his friends to just up and kill him if they truly couldn't forgive him (which at that point was more reasonable of a time because the war was still new and people didn't know if they could trust him with this specific appointment yet. By later in the story I don't think it would have been as reasonable for someone to try to kill him after he'd already been proving himself).
In other words, nobody did it. Everyone, literally everyone, backed off and respected Dimitri's decision (and technically Sylvain and Matthias' as well). None of those people, even when given open opportunity, turned a weapon on him. Not one. These people all gave him a chance. These are the same people he died fighting for, and for himself to be able to feel like he was fighting and dying for what he would have to begin with if he hadn't been disinherited - Faerghus and its people.
In the end Miklan was in both rank and heart a top ranking commander of Faerghus and he both appreciated it and knew he appreciated it. He was looking forward to the future Dimitri would bring, basically saying that he thinks Dimitri is a fool ("weak-willed") for it but that he now believes in it too. If anyone wants to try arguing those points, I have receipts as the young folk call them, fresh from Miklan himself about his feelings about it as spoken to Catherine and Shamir!
Miklan fought for the future he was hoping to see, and he died protecting that future. Again, not something he by any means whatsoever had to do. He was tasked with guarding the fortress, but was never told to lay down his life defending it. After years and years of being hateful and angry, he finally had some peace of mind and hope for what he could be. He was loyal to Dimitri in the end because Dimitri was loyal to him - that is, he kept his word and Miklan was able to thrive in Dimitri's society without being a bandit or having to worry about his future because of his status.
Like Dimitri said, the only thing holding him down by that point were his past mistakes. It was up to Miklan to do something about that for himself with the opportunity he was given to fix it. Dimitri said here, fix it, and Miklan said okay, and worked to fix it. For me the saddest part is that he didn't even get enough time to properly fix it and be able to be free of his past. He died for Faerghus though, with his dying words being that he was able to buy them time (to arrive and fight back against the attacking Empire). That's not something someone who holds a resentful grudge would say in their last moments. He was grateful he managed to buy the other fighters time, even though it cost him his life.
hopes was a dumpster fire a whole lot of times but its incorporation of miklan into the plot was not one of them. miklan fire emblem my love you will live on in my heart and in my fics. i am also deeply grateful to hopes for uh i guess hopes-canonizing (hopesonizing???) basically every one of my headcanons about him before the game came out.
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I just bought myself a manga about the artist going through severe illness and I found it comforting to read someone else's experience, so I thought maybe I would share a little about my experience with MCAS again. so here's all the pills I take!
cromolyn. 2 ampules mixed with water 4x/day (although I'm often out of bed for 12 hours or less and have trouble keeping track of time, so often it's 3x instead). mast cell stabilizer.
multivitamin. I only took this for a week so far and stopped to gather data. (my paranoia was getting bad, which often means I'm reacting to a med. this is a cheap one with many fillers.) meant to make up for difficulty accessing food and possible malabsorption.
fludrocortisone. 2 pills a day. for POTS.
atenolol. 1 per day. also for POTS.
montelukast. 1 per day. technically for asthma, but works by blocking one of the signals the mast cells send.
loratadine (aka claritin). 1 pill 2x/day, which we had to fight the insurance about after a while. antihistamine, meant to prevent anaphylaxis by blocking a different mast cell signal.
aspirin. 2 pills 2x/day. to reduce inflammation and control chronic pain.
whichever oral hormonal birth control my insurance will give me (it varies). 1 per day. menstruation makes my MCAS flare and I still have incomplete cessation even after an ablation, so I keep taking it even when not putting myself at risk of pregnancy.
dye-free diphenhydramine (aka benadryl). another antihistamine, taken when my MCAS flares to reduce or completely end the symptoms. (the pink dye in the regular formulation is actually a very common trigger.)
low-dose prednisone. steroid kept on hand for unavoidably high-demand occasions (like moving across the country) or unshakable prolonged flares (like, a week).
that's 8 pills in the morning, 3-4 at night, 8 ampules in the day, and 2 different emergency meds. plus I try to drink a gatorlyte every day (also good for POTS and certain mineral shortages) and try to avoid triggers (including heat, stress, and overexertion -n- )
3 and 4 were the first meds that ever made me feel any better, before we'd figured out it was MCAS. (likely with secondary POTS/EDS.) 6 and 7 are the first line treatment for MCAS, they're the first medications I actually took *for* it. they are often used in combination with famotidine (aka pepcid) but that made my paranoia super bad so I stopped taking that one.
this was my regimen established before I got covid last july, which made my MCAS much worse, which also made it impossible to get a new doc post-move since I can't physically get to an appt. so this is likely to change once I have medical care again. being sick is a lot of work!
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