#this has been done to the sun and back but still

[stylesispunk]

The soldier in the armour | part iv

Marcus Acacius x f!reader

masterlist | previous chapter | next chapter

summary: Acacius put his plan on march, starting by sending you away with a sealing promise of returning back to you, but you cannot bear the thought of him fighting alone, and some plans are destroyed.

wc: 7k (lazy)

warnings: angst, age gap, mentions of miscarriage, blood, violence against women, power imbalance, kissing without consent, mentions of death. The events of this chapter happen on the same night.

a/n: Sorry for being so lazy about writing and updating lately. I'm just a teacher on her summer break. This one will be intense. Reblogs and comments are always appreciated. Happy reading. 💌

dividers by @/saradika-graphics

"Hold my hand," Acacius said, extending his arm toward you. You were sitting by the fountain, feeding the fish. The last couple of days had been torture for you, and he wanted nothing more than to shower you with acts of love from the deepest part of his heart.

You looked up, your eyes meeting his. There was a softness in his gaze, a quiet determination that melted the tension in your chest. The cool breeze rustled the leaves above, and for a brief moment, the world seemed to pause.

Reluctantly, you placed your hand in his, feeling the warmth of his touch seep into your skin. He gave a gentle squeeze, as if trying to transfer some unspoken strength to you.

"Come," he whispered, his voice a balm against the chaos of your thoughts. "Let me take you somewhere…”

You hesitated, glancing back at the rippling water, watching the fish dart beneath the surface. But the pull of his presence was stronger. You stood, your fingers still entwined with his, and allowed him to lead you away from the weight of the past few days.

He led you through a narrow corridor you didn’t recognize, its walls lined with ivy that crept in through tiny cracks. At the very end, hidden behind a heavy wooden door, Acacius paused. He glanced back at you, a small, knowing smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

“No one else knows about this place,” he murmured, his voice low, almost conspiratorial. “It’s just for us.”

He pushed the door open with a soft creak, revealing a hidden courtyard tucked away from the rest of the villa. It was small, intimate, overgrown with wildflowers and shaded by an ancient olive tree whose twisted branches reached out like protective arms. The air smelled of lavender and sun-warmed stone, and the only sounds were the gentle rustle of leaves and the distant song of cicadas at dawn.

Acacius turned to you, his expression softening. “I come here when I need to feel... whole again.” His thumb brushed over your knuckles, lingering. “And I thought maybe, just maybe, it could help you too.”

There was a strange tone on his voice, as if he was lingering to your presence before slipping away from you, but you decided to ignore the nagging feeling in the pit of your stomach.

"I know you're worried” you whispered, looking up at him to meet his gaze, smiling softly ��but I’m gonna be fine. I’ll recover from this someday.”

“Can I confess you something?” He asked almost ashamed of the question

You nodded, inviting him to speak his truth.

"This is embarrassing for a general but I'm really scared."He confessed, “I…I have someone to lose this time"

Your breath hitched and sudden wave of anxiety crept into your bones.

"You won't lose me" you reassured, caressing his checks with your fingertips.

"From all the battles I fought. Falling in love with you came easily to me...I thought it was going to be difficult for a man like me to be deserving of someone like you.

"This sounds like a goodbye and I don't like that tone in your voice." You said, voice breaking at the thought.

“You know things could go wrong-“

“They will not.” You interrupted, reassuring him once again.

“Allowing myself to know you and love you has been the bravest thing I've ever done," he whispered, his voice trembling just enough for you to hear the depth of his fear, and his love.

Before you could respond, his hand slid to the back of your neck, pulling you gently but urgently toward him. His lips met yours in a kiss that was both fierce and tender, as if he were pouring every feeling inside on it, every hidden feeling into that single, breath-stealing moment. The world around you seemed to dissolve, the rustling leaves, the distant cicadas, all fading into the background as the warmth of his mouth ignited something deep within you.

Your heart raced, the anxiety still humming in the edges of your mind, but his touch grounded you, as always. You let your fingers trail through his hair, pulling him closer, as if anchoring him to this promise you both silently made.

You won't lose me. We won’t lose each other.

When he finally pulled back, his forehead rested against yours, both of you breathless, hearts pounding in the same rhythm, at the same time. His eyes searched yours, as if trying to memorize this moment, to etch it into his soul.

Then, without warning, he kissed you again, this time with a raw urgency that stole the air left from your lungs. His hands slid from your jaw down to your waist, gripping you as though he could mold your bodies into one. His fingertips dug into your skin, tracing every curve, every inch he could reach, as if committing the feel of you to memory.

You responded in kind, your hands roaming over his shoulders, his back, clutching at the fabric of his tunic like it was the only thing tethering you to reality. The heat between you was electric, a fire burning bright against the looming shadow of what was to come.

When he finally pulled back again, his breath was ragged, his lips lingering against yours for a fleeting second longer. His hands framed your face now, thumbs brushing softly against your cheeks in contrast to the urgency of moments before. His gaze was heavy, filled with a thousand words he couldn’t seem to say.

He leaned in, pressing one lingering kiss to your forehead, his lips warm against your skin.

"My heart, my body and my soul belong to you in every lifetime." He whispered, nosing your neck, savoring the taste of your skin.

"My heart, my body and my soul belong to you in every lifetime. Since the day you saved me from the bathtub and sword you would love me." You whispered the same words back because you meant them.

He smiled against your neck, feeling his eyes watering already. For a man of a thousand battles these shows of affection tended to seen as a sign of weakness. But by your side he learnt about the vulnerability that it came when you loved someone.

You smelled like calm lavender, and your souls interviewed in an unbreakable thread destined to meet in every single lifetime.

You were his person; the best Rome had ever given him back for all the duty and sacrifice. It broke his heart to send you away.

He didn’t fear death anymore, but not seeing you again broke him.

Acacius helped you up, his strong arm supporting you, your heart still ached with the lingering sensation of his words, his love, his devotion. You walked together, the world outside the villa seeming quieter. His hand remained gently wrapped around yours.

When you reached back to the villa, the air felt heavy, as if something was waiting for you there. The grand doors opened to reveal Lucilla standing near the font, her hands trembling slightly as she stood motionless, her gaze distant. Her expression was clouded with worry, yet there was an undeniable sorrow in her eyes that you couldn’t ignore.

“Mother, what’s wrong?” you asked, stepping forward, concern flooding your chest as you glanced between her and Acacius.

Lucilla turned her head slowly, her eyes brimming with tears.

"They are here" she said, painfully ignoring your questions as she looked at Acacius.

"It's time" he said, painfully, avoiding looking at you for a moment, then he glanced at you "Look. They are some of my men. They are here to take you out-“

"I don't want to leave" you protested, coming to Lucilla, "Mother, please don't do this again. Come with me"

 You stepped back, your heart twisting painfully as you listened to Acacius, walking to your mother.

"I don't want to leave," you protested again, your voice trembling. You reached for her, the distance between you growing wider with every passing second. "Mother, please don't do this again. Come with me."

Lucilla’s eyes shimmered with unshed tears, and for a moment, she looked as though she might give in. But the sorrow on her face deepened, and she shook her head gently. "I cannot, my dear. I failed Lucius once." Her voice cracked as she spoke his name, a deep, haunting sadness settling over her. "I won’t fail you too. Not again."

You felt the sting of her words like a dagger in your chest. She was leaving you, just like she had left him. The memories of her absence in the darkest moments of your life, when you were fighting for survival, flashed before your eyes, and the thought of repeating that same pain was unbearable.

"So, you're failing me now?" you asked, the sharpness in your tone betraying the hurt you felt. Your breath was ragged as you held back tears, frustration and confusion bubbling up inside you.

Lucilla stepped forward, her hands trembling as she reached for you, but she stopped just short of touching you. "Oh no," she whispered, shaking her head. "I cannot bear the thought of losing you to this. If you're away, Geta won’t be able to use you as a tool against Acacius or me. I can't risk you being taken from me as he was."

The words stung, but in them, you realized the depth of her fear. She wasn’t abandoning you, she was trying to protect you, to keep you safe in a world where everything felt uncertain and dangerous.

"But I don’t want to be safe without you," you said softly, your voice breaking. "I can't go alone.”

Lucilla looked at you, her gaze softening for a brief moment, but the fear in her eyes remained. "I love you too much," she whispered, her voice barely audible. "And I can't watch you suffer here.”

Acacius stood behind you, his hand gently resting on your shoulder. His presence was a steady anchor in the storm of emotions threatening to overwhelm you. He knew how hard this was for you, but his silence spoke volumes. He understood what it meant to love and lose, and now, he was offering you something that felt like the only way forward.

Lucilla’s voice quivered as she took a step back, her hands clenched at her sides. "I cannot go with you... but I will wait for you here. And I will pray that one day you come back to me. That we both do."

You felt as though your heart was being torn in two—torn between the woman who had given you life and the man who had become your lifeline. The conflict swirled in your chest, but all you could do was nod, unable to find the right words.

"I love you," you whispered softly to her, your voice breaking as the tears finally fell.

Lucilla gave you a sad, bittersweet smile. "I love you too, my darling. Always."

You turned to Acacius, your heart sinking at the pained expression that crossed his face as his gaze shifted from you to the three men who had appeared in the distance. His posture stiffened, his eyes narrowing as they approached with purposeful strides.

The moment felt heavy, like the air itself was holding its breath. His soldiers had arrived. The plan was set in motion. The urgency of the situation weighed down on both of you, but there was something else, something unspoken in the way Acacius held himself. His pain, too, was palpable. As much as he had sworn to protect you, he knew what this moment meant. The time for goodbyes was closing in, and there was no turning back.

"Acacius..." you whispered, your voice trembling as you reached for his hand. But he stepped back slightly, his jaw tightening as his men neared.

He glanced over his shoulder at you, his eyes full of regret and determination. "You need to go. Now."

The men stopped in front of him, their faces unreadable but their posture betraying the tension of the moment. Acacius addressed them with a tone that brooked no argument, his voice firm but clipped.

"Prepare the horses," he commanded, and one of them nodded before heading off to carry out his orders.

You looked at Acacius, pain flickering in your chest as you realized that the next few moments would change everything. The world you had known was slipping away, and there was no going back to the life you had before.

"You’re leaving me, aren’t you?" you asked, the words slipping from your lips before you could stop them.

Acacius looked at you for a long moment, his expression unreadable, but his gaze softened when he saw the hurt in your eyes. "No. I’m not leaving you." His voice was low and full of certainty, though there was a storm of emotions raging behind those words. "I’ll never leave you. But I need you to trust me now."

You nodded, though the uncertainty in your chest remained. His men were getting ready, and you knew that there was no time left to hesitate.

"Promise me you’ll come to get me back," you said quietly, the words more of a plea than a command.

Acacius stepped closer, his hand brushing the side of your face, his thumb tenderly tracing over your skin. "I swear," he said, his voice raw and filled with emotion. "I’ll come back for you. I’ll do everything in my power to make sure we’re together again."

The words were like a lifeline, but the storm of emotions raging in your chest made it hard to hold on to them. You wanted to believe him more than anything, but the world was so unpredictable, and you knew better than to expect anything in these dark times.

As Acacius turned to give orders to his men, you felt the weight of the world crashing down on you, the finality of this moment settling into your bones. You wanted to run to him, to beg him to let you stay, but you couldn’t, because deep down, you knew what he was doing was necessary.

This was bigger than the two of you.

Acacius cupped your face once more, his eyes soft but heavy with the weight of what was to come. He leaned in, his lips brushing against yours in a gentle, lingering kiss, one that spoke of promises and unspoken fears. His touch was tender, like it was the last thing he could give you before everything changed.

"Be safe," he whispered against your lips, his breath warm and full of urgency. "No matter what happens, remember that I will always love you."

Your heart ached as his words sank in, the depth of his devotion resonating through every fiber of your being. You nodded, though your throat tightened, unable to find the words to express what you felt. His love, his promise, were everything you had left to hold on to in this fleeting moment.

He stepped back slightly, his hand still resting on your cheek, and without another word, he helped you onto the horse. His movements were swift and precise, his touch strong but careful as he steadied you in the saddle. His gaze never left yours, filled with a quiet desperation, as though he could somehow will the situation to change with just his stare.

As he stood next to the horse, his hand resting on the reins, he gave a final, lingering look, as though imprinting you into his memory. Then, with a slow exhale, he spoke again, his voice filled with finality.

"Trust in me," he said, his eyes intense. "No matter what happens, trust that I will find a way back to you."

His men began to move in the background, preparing to take you away. Acacius placed one last kiss on your forehead, a soft, lingering touch that felt like it was marking the end of a chapter. The taste of his lips, the warmth of his presence, remained with you, even as he pulled away and nodded to his soldiers.

With a final glance, he stepped back, his face a mixture of sorrow and determination. His hand reached out toward you one last time, as if he wanted to pull you into his arms, to hold you just a moment longer. But he didn’t. He couldn’t.

"Go," he said quietly, the word almost a command, but it carried so much emotion that it cut deep.

As the men took the reins of your horse and started moving you away, you cast one last look over your shoulder. Acacius stood there, still watching you, his face a mask of stoic resolve but his eyes betraying the pain that he had hidden behind his duty.

And then, as you were carried further away, the world around you began to blur. The sound of horses’ hooves pounding against the earth, the rustling of the wind, it all faded as you focused on the one thing that remained clear.

As the path beyond you seemed to haunt you, you tightened the cloak around your shoulders, its coarse fabric doing little to shield you from the chill that seeped into your bones. Every step away from the villa felt heavier and suffocating, each one pulling you farther from Acacius, your mother, and Lucius. The road stretched ahead, but your mind remained trapped in the past, tangled in memories and regrets.

You couldn’t shake the image of Acacius’s eyes, the way they softened when he looked at you, or the feel of his lips pressed against your forehead. The smell of lavender on his neck that seemed to lullaby you into sleep every time he wrapped his strong arms around you. Your heart ached thinking about your mother, her face etched with sorrow and strength as she pushed you to safety. And Lucius, your brother, the rightful emperor of Rome, forced to live as a slave under a name that was never his.

As Acacius's men guided you through the winding paths, the weight of your separation grew unbearable. You were being secured by Acacius’s army, hidden away from the dangers that loomed, but it felt more like a prison than protection. You were trapped in the middle of something larger than yourself, and the distance only amplified the helplessness curling in your chest.

Meanwhile, back at the villa, Acacius stood frozen, his gaze fixed on the direction you had disappeared. His heart clenched painfully, the hollow ache of your absence settling deep within him. A single tear escaped down his cheek, betraying the stoic facade he tried to maintain. The emptiness in his chest felt insurmountable, as if a piece of him had been torn away.

You were the Achilles heel on his life, he couldn’t bear the thought of you being away from his protection.

Lucilla, seeing the turmoil etched across his face, stepped forward and placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. “She’s strong, like her father” she whispered, her voice steady despite the tears glistening in her own eyes. “And you will find your way back to her.”

Acacius’s jaw tightened, his hand coming to rest over Lucilla’s in silent acknowledgment. The touch sent shivers down his spine; it wasn’t love but understanding. The both of you letting go your heart away.

His eyes never wavered from the path you had taken, his heart silently vowing that no matter what, he would find you again.

Beneath the cloak, you knew you hadn’t far away from the villa. Just one bold movement and you could go back.

There was a weight that became heavier to bear. Acacius would risk his life to free an empire from its tyranny, and perhaps the power would go back to your family while your mother would get stuck in the middle and Lucius real identity would display.

Suddenly, the weight of it all became unbearable. Without thinking, you yanked on the reins, bringing the horse to a skidding halt. The men guarding you shouted in alarm, but their voices were distant echoes compared to the roaring in your ears. You leapt off the horse, your feet hitting the ground hard, and before they could react, you were running, running back towards the villa, towards the people you couldn’t abandon.

"Stop! Come back!" Acacius's men called after you, their voices laced with desperation. But you didn’t listen. You couldn’t. You wouldn’t let them risk their lives while you hid away, blind to whatever horrors might unfold.

you couldn’t turn your back on them. Not now. Now after all.

You were stronger than that. You were the daughter of Maximus Decimus, a man of honor.

You wouldn’t let them risk their lives while you hid away, blind to whatever horrors might unfold. The wind tore at your cloak, your breath coming in ragged gasps as your feet pounded the dirt path. Every step closer to the villa felt like shedding a layer of fear, replaced by a fierce, unyielding resolve.

The villa loomed in the distance; it brought a strange comfort to your heart. Your mind raced faster than your legs, what if you were too late? What if Acacius or your mother were already in danger? The thought spurred you on, ignoring the burning in your lungs and the aching in your legs.

Behind you, the shouts of Acacius’s men grew fainter, their figures shrinking against the horizon. But your heart was set, you belonged there, in the thick of it, facing whatever fate awaited alongside those you loved. As the gates of the villa came into view, your heart pounded not from exhaustion, but from the sheer force of your determination.

You were almost there.

"Acacius!" you shouted, breathless as you reached the entrance. As soon as he came into view, you crashed into him, and he caught you effortlessly, his arms wrapping around you in an embrace that felt like home.

"What are you doing here?" His voice was hushed, desperate, his hands moving to cradle your face, as if he needed to be sure you were real.

"I can't-" you gasped out, struggling to steady your breath. "Don't ask me to run away while you stay here. Please, don’t."

His fingers traced your jaw, his forehead pressing against yours as he exhaled shakily. "I can’t put you in danger," he whispered. "I won’t."

You closed your eyes, your breath mingling with his. His warmth surrounded you, grounding you, but the ache in your chest only grew stronger.

"How?" you whispered, searching his eyes. "How can I leave when you will be here fighting?

Acacius’s jaw clenched. "You know what will happen if you stay—"

"And you know what will happen if I go!" You pulled back slightly, forcing him to see the determination burning in your eyes. "I grew up in a world where privilege was handed to me until it wasn’t. My heart was humble until it wasn’t. I never realized how greedy I could be until I met you, until my heart started beating for you. I want everything that comes from you—your words, your breath, your smile, your heart, you. And if there is a chance, they take you from me, then I’d rather meet the spirits myself than live in a world where you don’t exist."

His breath hitched, and for the first time, you saw something break in him. A vulnerability so raw it threatened to consume you both. His hands trembled against your cheeks, his thumbs brushing away the tears you hadn’t realized had fallen.

"Please," he pleaded, his voice barely above a whisper. "Don’t make this harder for me."

Your heart twisted painfully. "Then don’t make it harder for me, either. You already know how voiceless women are here. Let me make my choice for once."

His eyes darkened with conflict, with love, with fear. And then, without another word, he crushed his lips against yours. it was a desperate, aching plea. A promise. A surrender.

When he pulled away, his breath was ragged, his hands still cupping your face as though afraid you’d disappear.

"Then stay," he whispered. "And if the gods are kind, we will survive this together."

But you were afraid the gods had never been kind to lovers like you.

Lucilla watched the exchange in silence before stepping forward. "My child," she said gently, "I know you are willing to risk your life for those you love. But this is not a fight you can win with your heart.”

You turned to her, desperation burning in your eyes. "I know this villa better than anyone. I grew up here. I know every passage, every hidden corridor. If I can get to Lucius, I can free him. We can hide. We can escape and Acacius and his army will free Rome."

"No," Acacius said immediately, shaking his head. "Absolutely not."

"He’s my brother!" you argued.

"And what happens when you get caught?" Lucilla’s voice was softer, but no less firm. "You think Geta or Caracalla will show mercy to you? He’ll use you against us, just as he always intended."

Acacius tightened his grip on you. "You are the only thing keeping me from turning this entire city to dust. If something happens to you, I won’t stop. I won’t care about the cost."

You swallowed hard, your chest rising and falling with each rapid breath. "Then let me help you. Let me help Lucius."

"The best way to help is to stay safe," Lucilla insisted. "We will find a way, Acacius-“

“Lucius will refuse Acaciu’s help.” You interrupted, “He took the city he was in, but I’m his sister.”

Acacius's jaw tightened, his eyes dark with frustration and the fear it came when danger seemed to follow you. He shook his head. "That’s exactly why you can’t go. You think he’ll just follow you? Lucius is stubborn. He won’t leave. He won’t abandon his pride, even for you."

"He will if I make him see reason," you pressed, your voice trembling with conviction you wanted to believe. "If I remind him who he is, what he stands for. He’ll listen to me."

Lucilla exhaled sharply, stepping between you and Acacius, her presence like a steady force in the eye of the storm. "And if he doesn’t? If he refuses, what then?”

You flinched at her words. The weight of this pressed down on you, but you refused to let it break you. "Then at least I’ll have tried," you whispered. "At least I won’t sit in hiding while the people I love fight for their lives."

Acacius turned away from you abruptly, running a hand through his hair, his breath ragged. "Damn it," he muttered under his breath before spinning back toward you. "Do you even hear yourself? Do you know what you’re asking me to do?" His voice cracked, raw and unguarded. "You’re asking me to send you straight into the lion’s den. To just…juts let you walk into danger while I stand back and watch."

"I’m asking you to trust me," you said, your voice fierce despite the tears burning your throat. "I have spent my whole life being protected, shielded from the ugliness of this world. But I am not some delicate thing to be tucked away. If we are to have any future at all, we must take risks."

Acacius closed his eyes, as if trying to drown out your words, to quiet the war inside him. Lucilla placed a hand on his arm, grounding him. "She is her father's daughter," she murmured, her gaze heavy with understanding. "You cannot change her mind when it is already set."

He let out a shaky breath, his hands curling into fists before he finally looked at you again. "If you go, you do not go alone."

Your breath hitched. "Acacius-"

"You do not go alone," he repeated, his voice leaving no room for argument. "I will not let you face this without protection."

Lucilla nodded. "I know someone who can get you into the cells unnoticed. But you must understand-this is your one chance. If something goes wrong, there will be no second attempt. No coming back for you."

Your heart pounded as the full weight of the decision settled in. There was no turning back now.

"Then I will not fail," you promised, meeting Acacius’s gaze.

But even as you said the words, you knew that fate was a cruel, unpredictable thing.

“I will wait for you at the end of the dungeon” He explained, “Once you free Lucius, both of you, especially you will come and going to go away. Then when tomorrow came, I’ll get everything settle for what’s coming.”

Lucilla’s expression was unreadable, but there was something in her eyes something like resignation. "We don't have time to argue anymore," she said finally. "If you're going to do this, you must go now."

Acacius stepped closer, his hands gripping your arms as if he could anchor you to him. His touch burned, searing into your skin, branding you with the weight of his worry. "Promise me," he murmured. "Promise me that no matter what happens, you won’t hesitate. The moment Lucius is free, you run."

You swallowed hard, nodding, though you weren’t sure if you could keep that promise.

Lucilla moved toward the entrance, glancing over her shoulder. "I will send word to the one who will take you inside. Wait for him by the servants' passage near the western wall. And keep your head down."

Acacius leaned in, pressing his forehead against yours, his breath warm against your lips. "Be careful," he whispered. "I need you to come back to me."

You lingered there for a moment, memorizing the feeling of his hands on you, the way his voice softened when he spoke to you, the way he looked at you as if you were something worth fighting for.

"Mia vita" he called out, stopping you on your tracks to kiss you softly, the pulled back slightly “Please don't let this to be our last kiss"

"We still have a life to live together" you smiled against his lips, peeking his lips once more "at peace this time"

"I will find you" he promised, peeking your lips once again, savoring every single second of this. "I'll be waiting for you at the end of the dungeon."

You nodded, feeling shivers down your spine. He kissed your lips again as if couldn’t let go because of the fear, tasting the sweet flavor of fruits on them, lingering to the feeling that in a few hours he would free Rome from the tyranny and escape with you to a happy ending, a happy life.

"Be careful, love" he whispered as you walked from his grasp.

Then, with one final look, you turned and disappeared into the shadows.

And as you did, Acacius stood still, watching you leave, his fists clenched at his sides.

He had never felt so powerless.

The night stretched long and cold as you moved through the villa’s outer corridors, keeping close to the stone walls. Every shadow felt like a threat waiting to cut you in half, every sound a warning. Your heart pounded in your chest, but you forced yourself forward. Your mother’s contact was waiting near the western wall as promised, a hooded figure who barely looked at you before motioning for you to follow.

"This way," he whispered, leading you through a narrow passage. "The guards are fewer tonight, but that won’t last long."

You nodded, pressing yourself deeper into the cloak wrapped around your shoulders. The passage led downward into the lower levels of the coliseum, where the scent of damp stone and burning torches thickened the air. With each step, the reality of what you were about to do settled heavier in your chest.

Finally, the man halted near a rusted iron gate, peering around the corner before motioning for you to stop. "Beyond here, you’re on your own. You already know where the cells, be fast my lady.”

You exhaled slowly, steadying yourself before slipping through the gate. The corridor was dimly lit, flickering torchlight casting shadows along the stone walls. You kept low, moving carefully. Every instinct screamed at you to hurry, but you couldn’t afford mistakes.

Then you saw him.

Lucius sat in the farthest cell, his head down, his hands bound in front of him. His tunic was dirtied and torn; his face shadowed with exhaustion. But he was still alive.

"Lucius," you whispered urgently, pressing yourself against the bars. His head snapped up, eyes widening at the sight of you.

"By the gods," he breathed. "What are you doing here?"

"Freeing you," you said, already fumbling with the lock. "We don’t have much time, Acacius has a plan, but we need to go now."

Lucius let out a short, breathless laugh. "Acacius? And here I thought you had come to your senses and abandoned him.”

You shot him a glare, your fingers working as quickly as possible. "Do you want to fight about this, or do you want to walk out of here alive?"

Before he could respond, footsteps echoed down the hall. Your breath caught.

The guards were coming.

You barely had time to think. With trembling fingers, you worked at the lock, gritting your teeth as the iron refused to give. Lucius shifted impatiently behind the bars, his gaze darting toward the approaching footsteps.

"Hurry," he muttered.

"I know," you hissed, forcing yourself to focus. The crude metal bit into your skin, but finally, with a sharp click, the lock gave way. You got the door open, and Lucius stepped out, shaking the stiffness from his limbs.

"We need to go," you whispered.

Together, you slipped into the shadows, pressing yourselves against the cold stone walls. The guards were close now, their voices carrying down the corridor. You gripped Lucius’s wrist, pulling him forward as you sprinted through the winding path of the dungeon.

Your breaths came fast and shallow, your heart hammering with every turn. The torches flickered wildly in the drafty halls, casting distorted shapes that sent chills up your spine.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, you reached the end of the dungeon, the meeting place Acacius had promised.

But he wasn’t there.

You came to a sudden stop, chest heaving as your eyes darted around the empty space.

"Where is he?" Lucius whispered harshly.

You didn’t answer. He should be here.

He said he would be here. You thought.

A cold feeling crept up your spine. Something was wrong.

Your pulse thundered in your ears. Think. Think faster. Acacius wasn’t here. That meant something had gone wrong. That meant-

“We have to move,” you whispered, gripping Lucius’s arm.

He gave you a sharp look, but didn’t argue. You took the lead, slipping through the dimly lit corridor, your body tense, ears straining for any sound. The dungeon air was thick with dampness, every breath heavy in your chest.

Acacius had told you to wait. But waiting was a death sentence now.

He could be in trouble. He could be dead.

No. You forced the thought away. Acacius was strong. He was waiting for you somewhere else. He had to be.

Lucius kept pace beside you, his voice low and urgent. “Where are we going?”

“Out,” you said, scanning the hallway. “I know another way.”

A narrow servant’s passage was carved into the farthest wall, one you had used as a child to sneak out when the world inside these walls had felt too suffocating. You yanked open the hidden door, pushing Lucius through before slipping inside yourself. The stone closed behind you, sealing you both in darkness.

The passage was narrow, forcing you to move single file. Your fingers trailed the rough stone as you navigated through the twisting tunnel, the air cool and stale. You could hear Lucius’s uneven breathing behind you, but neither of you spoke.

You reached the end and pressed against the wooden panel that led to the outside. For a long moment, you hesitated.

If Acacius wasn’t here, it meant something had shifted in the plan. But you had no time to figure out what.

You had to keep moving.

Bracing yourself, you pushed the door open and stepped into the night.

The night air was a fleeting whisper of freedom before it was ripped away.

The moment you and Lucius stepped beyond the hidden passage, torches flared to life, illuminating the ring of imperial guards waiting for you. The glint of their drawn swords was the only warning you had before rough hands seized you.

Lucius struggled, his fury a silent storm beside you, but he was outnumbered. A soldier slammed the hilt of his sword into his stomach, and he collapsed to his knees, gasping for breath.

“Lucius!” you shouted, lunging toward him, but another set of hands wrenched you back.

A grizzled guard stepped forward; his expression smug beneath his bronze helmet. “Did you really think you could slip away unnoticed?” he sneered.

You twisted against their grip, but they held you firm. “Where is Acacius?” you demanded. “What have you done to him?”

The guard chuckled darkly. “Worry for yourself, little dove.” He leaned in, his breath rank against your cheek. “Emperor Geta will not be fond of you after this treason.”

Your stomach twisted. Geta. He knew.

The guards yanked you and Lucius apart, dragging him in the opposite direction. He thrashed violently, eyes burning with desperation as they pulled him away from you.

“Stay strong,” he shouted. “Don’t give them what they want!”

Then he was gone.

You fought harder, but it was useless. The last thing you saw before they forced you forward was the blood-red banners of the empire swaying in the cold night air.

The throne room was suffocating with tension, the air thick with the scent of oil and burning torches. Acacius and Lucilla stood before the imperial dais, their bodies rigid as Emperor Geta lounged with lazy arrogance in his gilded chair. Caracalla stood beside him, his fingers curling and uncurling as if barely restraining his temper.

The moment Acacius learned you had been captured, something inside him had snapped. His presence alone carried a storm, his jaw clenched, fists curled at his sides, the veins in his neck straining with suppressed fury.

“Where is she?” Acacius demanded, his voice like thunder cracking through the hall.

Geta smirked, swirling the wine in his goblet. “Who?” he mused, feigning innocence. “Oh, you mean your wife.” He sighed dramatically. “A shame, really. I expected more from you, Acacius. But in the end, even the great general is brought to his knees for a woman.”

Acacius took a menacing step forward, only for Lucilla to press a warning hand against his arm. “You do not want to do this,” she whispered, though even her voice carried the edge of a threat.

Caracalla’s lip curled; his rage barely restrained. “You made a mistake, Acacius. You should have fled with her when you had the chance.”

“I will get her back,” Acacius growled. His eyes snapped to Geta, cold and unrelenting. “Emperor Geta, torture me if you want, but don't dare to lay a finger on my wife.”

Geta’s expression darkened at that word.

His knuckles went white around the goblet before he set it down with deliberate slowness. “But I will,” he said, his voice dangerously smooth. He walked towards Acacius, stepping closer, his grin cruel. “Now, I’m going to see her.”

Acacius lunged, but the guards were already between them, forcing him back as Geta strode from the room. The moment the doors slammed shut behind him, Acacius let out a roar of frustration. He whirled, striking one of the marble pillars with his fist hard enough to crack the stone.

Acacius’s chest heaved with each ragged breath, but when he turned to face Lucilla next to him, his eyes were filled with something worse than fury.

Desperation.

His hands clenched into fists again. “I will kill him. I swear it.”

The cell was damp and smelled of rust and decay. You hit the ground hard as the guards shoved you inside, the impact jolting through your knees and elbows. The cold stone bit into your skin, but you barely felt it, your mind was reeling, heart hammering in your chest.

"You should have stayed where you belonged," one of the guards sneered from the other side of the iron bars. "Emperor Geta will not be fond of you after this treason."

You lifted your head, eyes burning with defiance. "I still have you to make him beg for mercy."

The guard scoffed but did not reply. He only smirked, slamming the barred door shut with a loud clang before disappearing down the corridor, his footsteps fading into the darkness.

You exhaled sharply, forcing yourself to sit upright. Every part of you ached, but pain was the least of your concerns.

You exhaled shakily, pressing a hand to your face as tears threatened to spill. But you wouldn’t cry.

Instead, you allowed yourself a moment to gather your strength. Tomorrow was coming, and with it, the arena and whatever fate awaited Acacius. Whatever happened, you wouldn’t let Geta break you.

Then, a sound.

Footsteps. Slow. Measured.

A chill ran down your spine.

You knew who it was before you even saw him.

The door creaked open, and there he stood.

Emperor Geta.

The first thing he did as he took glance of you was grabbing your face forcefully with his hand, forcing you to spare him a glance. He wouldn't even dream of seeing you like this, is disbelief, with your hair a mess, and bloody. You weren't made for a life like this, but now under these conditions, this was the closest he had come to have you.

"Escaping with that slave, my dear lady? You marrying Acacius felt less insulting than this." He said, looking dead into your shining orbits.

"Marrying you would an insult to myself. I would rather eat shit than be tied to you." You spatted.

Geta's smile widened as a cruel laugh escaped his lips as his studied your features. Your before soft skin seemed dirty by drops of blood and dirt. You were a delicate doll, but now smashed and crumbled.

Geta’s expression twisted, his smugness evaporating in an instant. His jaw clenched, and his eyes burned with rage. Before you could react, his hand lashed out, the sharp crack of the slap ringing through the chamber.

The force of the blow snapped your head to the side, and you stumbled, catching yourself against the floor. Your cheek stung, the pain radiating hot and angry, but it was nothing compared to the cold fury swelling in your chest.

Geta loomed over you, his breath heavy, his hand still trembling from the strike. “You will not speak to me that way,” he hissed, his voice low and dangerous. “You forget who holds your life in his hands. You forget who I am. I'm the emperor and you're just a prisoner granted privileges because of your mother and Acacius" his face got close to you, "but now you're a mere slave accused of treason."

You spit on his face. The anger and loathing consuming like a fire burning your body.

Geta took his hand to his face, cleaning your spit with disgust written on his face. You had ended with his patience and he couldn't bear it anymore.

Just a few hours ago you had been secured on Acacius big arms, surrounded by the faint scene of laurel and lavender that seemed to calmed you down.

Now the stink of dirt and humidity rusted your nostrils. You wanted to close your eyes and feel the lavender on your nose, Acacius lips on your temple. You wanted him to save you, you were pleading the gods.

"Please stop this...let me see him" you begged, your voice broken. "Don't hurt him."

Lifting your gaze to see if by chance there would be a tiny bit of sympathy dancing on his eyes, you face the coldest gaze you had ever seen.

"Acacius' life is on my will, your mother's...even that beloved gladiator of yours." He got closer once again, looking directly to your eyes, you felt his wine breath on your face, "Test my patience once again, my lady and I will snap my finger like this" he snapped his fingers in front of you, getting closer to your lips you can almost feel his on your and it felt repulsive "and all of them will be dead. All of them!"

You gritted in protest, the repulsion of his touch filling you with an instinctual fear that made your skin crawl. The air between you felt suffocating, and the words he spoke echoed in your mind like a distant nightmare, gnawing at the edges of your sanity.

You tried to pull away, but his grip tightened, forcing you to remain still as his lips lingered too close to yours. The stench of wine and bitterness clung to him, every part of him an invasion to your thoughts, to your soul.

"Don’t you dare," you hissed, your voice trembling but filled with defiance. You refused to let him have the satisfaction of breaking you.

“You have no idea what I could give you,” Geta began, his voice low and smooth, carrying the weight of his authority. “Power, wealth, freedom to rule by my side as my wife. Everything you’ve ever dreamed of could be yours if only you’d open your eyes and choose me.”

You hold your gaze, your heart pounding in your chest as his lips pressed forcefully against yours. The taste of wine and greed made your stomach churn, and every inch of your body screamed in protest. This was not love. This was a sick obsession, an attempt to break your will and twist your bones. You clenched your fists, refusing to let him see the fear creeping at the edges of your resolve.

"I would rather die than choose you," you spat, your voice full of venom.

“I don’t care what you want” he said, pulling away just to stand up, smiling cruelly down at you on the ground. "Chain her to the wall." He ordered the guards

Your despair filled the dirty dungeons "No, please. Don't" you squirmed under the men's hold "Let me go!"

The cold stone wall bit into your skin as the guards’ iron chains wrapped around your wrists, pulling you taut against the damp, dark dungeon. The echo of your cries was swallowed by the silence of the place, but inside, your fury burned with an intensity you had never known. You clenched your teeth, fighting the tears that threatened to fall, determined to stay strong.

"Goodnight, my princess," Geta’s mocking voice lingered in the air long after he was gone, a cruel reminder of his power over you.

Your screams followed geta's steps as he walked away from you. You were left there to drown in your own tears as you curse and whatever plan his Machiavellian mind has.

Your fingers tightened into fists, nails digging into your palms as you whispered a curse under your breath, a spell woven from the ancient words passed down through history. Soon the future of Rome would be defined and you were going to take charge of it.

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[celestialwaavelength]

I’ll go point by point through your response, by paragraph.

Yes, that was his name given to him by his parents, but if we trust the recollection he shared with Louis in the episode where he shares his background, that isn’t exactly a relationship colored by love and connection to his culture. It’s one colored by the same flavor of betrayal that his relationship with Marius is/was, because he says he believes his parents cared for him only to find that they had sold him into slavery. So if it is a name he associates with home, it’s a broken home that he is afraid of. But also, it’s not a name he associates with home because he explicitly states that he cannot at all remember his time in Delhi. “My first memory, being run down by slavers…my second…curious.” Any relationship he has to “home” is tied to a memory of his time with Marius, and audiences that want to tie him to a cultural and geographical background to which he does not tie himself are reducing him to his ties to an ethnic group for their own comfort, not his. That is not how he identifies himself. Moreover, he’s a five hundred year old vampire powerful enough to retrieve Louis from the sun and hunt down the neighbor in broad daylight unharmed, to break not one but two covens despite the wishes of other vampire power structures, if he wanted to change his name back, he would. He’s not exactly helpless, hence the comedy surrounding his false assertion that Sam was the only one keeping him from saving Louis. To allege that Louis is returning him to the truth of his identity makes it seem like Louis, the American, is saving him, the Asian, from being victimized by all these mean European vampires, which is paternalistic. If he wanted to go by Arun and re-ally himself with Delhi, he could do that all on his own, but his lived memories have been in Europe, and he clings around the region of Paris because of his ties to Lestat, which he does consider part of his personal history.

Louis didn’t pimp him out: did he “allow” Armand to step back from a role, or again, could Armand have done that if he wanted to at any point, as when Daniel said “you let (Lestat) destroy” the children of darkness, and Armand shrugged and said he felt it was a good and convenient opportunity because Lestat was saying all the things he’d been thinking? Again, why does Armand need Louis to save him? In the books, Armand says that he wanted to keep the theater open because he thought if he did it would earn Lestat’s love. “It wasn’t that I wanted vengeance…but you came to be healed and you did not want me! A century I had waited and you did not want me.” And then he permitted and enabled the theatre to implode. It never had anything to do with Louis. This scene has nothing to do with Louis. Armand is most certainly an individual seeking love and validation following a series of traumas, but also one quite capable of enacting great violence and destruction when he felt so inclined. He did not need Louis to let him do anything, and to imply he does is again, paternalistic. Also—a subservient role he preferred??? Perhaps he desired a sexual subservient role, and perhaps even he enjoyed that role to be extended into his interpersonal relationship in non-sexual contexts in a form of role play that was not restricted to the bedroom, but he wanted to retain his position as coven leader with a coven that had been loyal for “200 years,” leading to his very intentional, very calculated betrayal of Louis, because the last time he was in a subservient role, with his maker, that person betrayed him to a degree he still in the show does not fully understand. He allegedly maintains full agency, according to your reading, and yet aside from this scene, the only times Louis uses the name Arun, again the name his slavers would have called him, is when he is commanding something. “Are you asking or telling, Maitre?” To incorporate his racial, ethnic, and historic subjugation to which you claim he should have emotional ties into the bdsm dynamic of their romance is not cute, it’s cruel.

To your last point about he Jim Crow south:

Yes, Louis was obviously a black queer man who experienced profound racism and discrimination in both his human and vampire life in the US, and further in Europe. There is no denying that he is intimately familiar with the structures of oppression in US history. That said, he was also, among that oppressed population, particularly privileged. He was immensely wealthy, and that class privilege afforded him a level of protection not accessible to other black men in the 1940’s in Louisiana. He was also creole, a term which has a kind of squishy definition. In the novel it means he is of French descent but born in the colonies. In the context of the series, it similarly means that he is descended, though generations later, from a social class that was in identity more allied with European ancestry that grants him an economic middle to upper class status. This does not in any way erase his blackness or the discrimination faced by black men in his position. But it does add a layer of complex intersectionality to his identity that ties him to both oppressor and oppressed, hence his speech in the confession box—“I am a thief, lord, I profit off the miseries of other men, and I do it easy. Drugs, liquor, women. I lure them in and grab what they’ve got, Lord. I take daughters with no homes and I put them out on the street, Lord. And I lie to myself saying that I’m giving them roof and food and dollar bills in they pockets, but I look in the mirror and I know what I am: the big man in the big house stuffing cotton in my ears so I can’t hear their cries.” He knows that he is in a position, despite being oppressed himself, to oppress others, and that he does this to poorer black and disabled women, and he himself ties this to the imagery of “big man in the big house” and “cotton,” openly acknowledging himself that his position is unique but in many ways certain of his actions mirror those of the people that oppress him. Now—do I think he’s evil or morally reprehensible for this? No, because I think Louis was a person in a terrible position put there by white supremacist power structures who turned to being complicit in those structures for survival. But do I think that being black and oppressed automatically makes him immune to victimizing others? Also no. Armand is still a person who, unlike Louis, has personally directly been the victim of sexual trafficking (if we believe his assertion that Marius loaned him out because Amadeo had a skill) and active slavery, not just the abhorrent legacy of slavery. Louis ties his own identity to the perpetrator in both those scenarios by his own dialogue in season one, episode one. This nuance is precisely what makes him such a fascinating character, and so cleverly written, and one of my favorites. This doesn’t mean I can’t criticize him or believe that he is, in the famous post colonialist Gayatri Spivak’s sense, putting Armand in a position of subaltern muteness. Louis admits that he searches for weakness and vulnerability in people and exploits those things for his own gain, so why can’t we? And why can’t we acknowledge that maybe he does this unknowingly and implicitly, and that he has learned this as a corrupted form of love due to his own history, and that he can both love and abuse Armand simultaneously, just as Armand and Lestat have loved and abused him?

I had an anon write me a really good analysis of this that I wanted to share, but accidentally deleted. If they see this and want to resend it, i would be thrilled.

"Are you sure this is what you want, Arun?" is THE most romantic Loumand line to me because this is Louis, knowing that Armand has suffered a life of abuse, of being bent and broken and reshaped to his captors' will, knowing that he has a complicated relationship with his own sense of self from the history he has shared, taking care to ask I want to know if you actually want this as yourself, not as Amadeo, the Maestro's perfect muse, not as Armand, the fearsome coven leader, but as Arun, the real you, before you were forced into those roles against your will. Arun, who did not have a choice then, you are free to make the choice now. Are you sure that you want this?

Which makes it extra unhinged that Armand's response is basically "yes daddy"

[jinxsequin]

mechanic!jinx drabble ⊹₊⟡⋆

| summary: mechanic!jinx x fem!reader drabble

| wc: 2.8k

| content: mechanic!jinx, modern au, men dni, kissing/making out, slightly suggestive, reader & jinx are a tiny bit mean first, mostly fluff, possibly ooc jinx, probably car/mechanic info inaccuracies lol

mechanic!jinx who owns or either co-owns her shop with ekko, obviously named something ridiculously quirky. it looks like your typical garage/shop from afar but is definitely done up with her signature touch.

so when you’re driving through town, exhaustion sweeping over you as the heat and long day of driving catch up to you, the sight of a garage with the light up monkey sign illuminating the dark roads fills you with both a sense of relief and curiosity. you take a left and pull in, turning off the engine and resting your head on the steering wheel for a moment. coming back to your home town was always a taxing process, but it had almost been long enough to forget just how tricky the journey was. almost.

you pulled down the sun visor, scanning your reflection in the mirror as you smoothed out unruly pieces of your hair. you’d almost reached your family home, but the engine making strange sounds and stalling in the middle of the road was happening too periodically for you to ignore. now that you think about it - you definitely should have pulled over and got it checked out way before. there wasn’t a lot in your hometown, and at this time, practically everything still functioning had long closed for the night - so when the lit up ‘open’ sign in front of the garage came into view you thanked your lucky stars.

the cool summer air hits you the second you step out of your car. you wrapped your arms around your body, your flimsy cardigan doing little to prevent the goosebumps forming on your arms. you cautiously ventured further inside, stopping when you catch sight of someone inside.

mechanic!jinx who doesn’t seem to be affected by the chilly temperature, you figure, as your eyes land on the back of her figure leaning over a workbench, black tank top clinging to the top half of her body, showing off the intricate cloud tattoos wrapped around her bicep extending down her arm. two messy blue braids swing around with every movement as she’s seemingly caught up in her tinkering. you take the opportunity to scan the place you’re standing in. the space is clearly well loved and definitely lived-in, evident by the doodles and sketches of vehicles and their parts pinned up, tools, mini figures of cars and metal scraps strewn across every surface. 

“we’re closed,” the figure speaks simply, finally noticing your presence despite not bothering to turn around. 

you furrow your brows, checking the time. sure, it was just past midnight, but the open sign had been pretty clear, hadn’t it?

“the sign says you’re open,” you huff out, hating to be that person but also so worn out, wanting nothing but to crash into a bed as soon as possible. 

the figure finally turns around, pulling the goggles to rest atop their head. the woman in front of you has the most striking eyes you’ve ever seen, magenta hue glinting under the lights of the garage. your breath catches in your throat as you take in the rest of the features of her face while she scans your form from top to bottom, eyes narrowed. 

“huh,” she finally replies, “must be broken again.” she walks to some spot behind you, meddling with a switch before turning back towards your figure. “there, closed!” she quipped with something that looked suspiciously like a grin. 

you spin around at her words, arms thrown up in exasperation. “are you fucking kidding me??” you bristle. jinx simply shrugs in response, a slight smirk playing on her lips at your annoyance. asshole.

you take a deep breath to attempt to collect yourself. you’re not going to get far if you piss off the only person around who can fix your car, however maddening she may be. “please, you guys are the only ones i’ve passed in this godforsaken town that look like you can actually help. it’ll be quick, and i’ll be out of your hair in no time,” you plead, swallowing your pride in hope that the woman before you would take mercy on you if she knew you were being genuine.

mechanic!jinx who toys with a spanner as she listens to you amusedly. she already knows she’s going to help - maybe she just wants to hear you beg. pretty women are her weakness, after all. she lets a beat of silence hang between you when you finish speaking, as if she’s weighing between decisions. she finally lets out a sigh, crossing her arms over her chest as she continues to scrutinise you. 

“fine,” she relents, rolling her eyes slightly, “let’s go see what the damage is, trouble.” 

she’s been hunched over the engine bay of your car for around twenty minutes already, twisting knobs and wiping areas with a rag, occasionally shaking her head and murmuring to herself at the sight. you stand to the side, thinking anxiously about the state of your car and how you’re going to get home but simultaneously fighting to overcome the thoughts of just how attractive she looks in her craft, unable to tear your eyes away from her. you think you’re actually going to have to slap yourself out of it, when she suddenly looks up from under the head to turn to you. 

“damn it toots, did you ever get the oil filter cleaned on this thing?” jinx jabs, shattering your thought spiral.

of course, she just had to be infuriating as well as impossibly hot. you roll your eyes, scowling. “obviously, i’m not that stupid,” you shot back.

“ha, when was the last time?” she replies, raising an eyebrow. not giving you the chance to respond, she turns back to the engine, shaking her head. “it’s not just that, the engine clearly overheated - that explains the noises you said it was making. it’s going to take a couple of days to fix.”

“so i can’t take it now?” you ask in reply, mentally facepalming afterwards at the stupidly obvious question.

“are you out of your mind?”

“shit,” you mutter, running your hands down your face in dismay. “what am i gonna do?” 

mechanic!jinx whose gaze softens as she looks to you, despite your words being directed to yourself more than anyone else. jinx hesitates for a moment, biting her lip as she figures out what to say. “i’ll give you a ride home if you need it,” she finally manages, watching you in anticipation of your reaction, though she’s surprised at herself too. 

your gaze snaps back to her at that in confusion, that’s not the reply you were expecting from the snarky woman. 

“really?” you reply, following behind her as she begins to swiftly walk away, packing up her tools. 

“sure, lemme close up first,” she replies seemingly collected, but the way she stays with her back turned as she begins rolling down the shutters of the workshop is a little conflicting. your eyes narrow at her though she can’t see you. there has to be some sort of catch to this. “wait, how do i know you’re not some creep, or like a serial killer or something-”

mechanic!jinx turning back to you, an expression of incredulousness on her face. “don’t make me retract my offer, toots,” she deadpans. that shuts you up, and you simply nod in accord as you trail after her to her car, far too tired to care or argue any longer. her car is just as sleek and cool-looking as you’d expect from someone in her profession , but the little modifications make it so her. you think you’re subtle in the way your eyes flick over it in quiet admiration, but the faint smirk painting her face is telling a different story. 

once you’re situated inside, you can’t help but let your curiosity at the oddness of the woman’s behaviour get the better of you. who does that??? “so do you just offer rides in the dead of your night to all your customers or…”

jinx turns to you with a glare as the engine comes to life. “can you just be grateful?” her words carry no bite though, and the faint blush across her cheeks isn’t helping. she has a feeling she knows why she offered like that so quickly but she definitely isn’t admitting that.

“okay, yeah no i’m grateful. veryyy grateful, thankyou,” you emphasise, quickly turning your eyes back to the road as jinx simply scoffs lightheartedly in response. you tell her the directions, and only a few words are passed between you as she begins to drive, the fatigue from the long day getting the better of the two of you. you’re definitely not subtle in the way you admire the view of her side profile while she’s driving and her hands gripped around the steering wheel - but thankfully she’s too preoccupied with the road in front of her to notice. 

once you finally park in front of your house, you’re more than ready to leave - though the eye candy in front of you is very tempting, you’re absolutely ready to sleep for a week. you’re also not sure how much longer you’ll be able to be near her without doing something embarrassing or regretful. jinx clears her throat just as your hand reaches the door handle, all previous confidence and smoothness apparently thrown to the wolves as you turn back to her questioningly. 

“you can come by in three days, your car should be fixed by then,” she says. then, after a short pause, “i’m jinx, by the way.” 

you tell her your name and thank her again, genuinely, before getting out. jinx waits till you’ve gone all the way inside, watching wistfully as your figure disappears from view before she turns the key back in, heading home for the night. 

mechanic!jinx who is teased mercilessly by ekko the following day when she tries to casually bring you up. casually - who is she kidding? she’s never been casual about anything in her life. 

“so wait, you’re telling me instead of, you know, doing the normal thing and asking for her number, you were just straight up a jerk instead???” ekko had laughed when she recounted the events to him. 

“fuck you. how was i supposed to pull that one off?” jinx scowled, “and for the record - we were closed, it was that goddamn sign glitching again.”

ekko snorted in response, shaking his head. “well, you quite literally had a reason to, when she’s supposed to come back for the car?”

“okay, smartass, back to work,” jinx snarked, as ekko narrowly dodged the scrunched-up note aimed at his head, still laughing. she couldn’t argue with that, but in her defence, she was usually way smoother than that…somewhat.

mechanic!jinx whose breath catches in her throat when you eventually come back after three days during which she definitely wasn’t thinking about you. you can’t deny the fact that you put a tiny bit more effort in your appearance today, more than what was needed for just going to a garage on the outskirts of the town, kicking yourself when you realised as you looked at your reflection that afternoon. your mind short circuits as you’re walking closer to her, simultaneously thanking whatever powers were out there for blessing your eyes with the view in front of you and cursing whatever was in the air to make you feel this way. 

“hey,” you say when you’re finally close enough to be within earshot. 

“hi,” jinx replies, eyes refusing to leave your face. a few beats of silence pass while you both stare, before you snap out of it and clear your throat. “soooo…my car, is it ready?” you sound out tentatively.

jinx plays with the hair at the back of her head as she nods awkwardly, suddenly looking anywhere but your face as she starts walking. “oh, of course, your car. right this way…” 

you follow her through the garage passing different areas before you reach your car, the two of you standing near the side doors of your car as jinx debriefs you on what exactly was wrong with your car and what was done to fix it. you’ve checked out of the conversation long ago, far too distracted by how ridiculously attractive she looks right now, tattoos on display once again, but also how charming she is rambling about things you probably barely have a idea about, let alone care about. It’s a shame it doesn’t last long though. 

“the air filter on that thing…worst one i’ve seen in years, probably. and that fuel pump - what do you do, run the tank to the ground-”

“excuse me,” you snap, eyes narrowed at her jabs, spell broken. she’s almost civil one moment, the next she’s on your back once again?

“what?” jinx’s eyes widen exaggeratedly as she shrugs her shoulders. “it’s all true, in fact toots, i don’t think you should really even be on the road.” that was it - okay, maybe you weren’t the best at maintaining your car but you were perfectly good at driving it, thank you very much.

“do you actually do anything around here, or is running your mouth the only thing you’re good at?” you shoot back, barely controlling your rage at how easily she can rile you up. 

“i’ll have you know i’m good at many things actually,” jinx taunts as she leans in closer to you, “like actually getting my car checked when the engine is on the brink of failure, though me personally i haven’t ever-”

“are you good at shutting the fuck up?” you interrupt, your glare scorching as the rest of your body heats in anger and maybe something else. 

“should we find out?” her voice drops to a teasing whisper as she leans in even closer to your space. you’re internally berating yourself for the way your gaze immediately drops to her lips, though when you look back up to meet her eyes there’s a flicker in them as she does the same. a sweet smell mixed with the slightest tinge of engine oil clings to her, clings to you, overwhelms your senses and your body and your brain and what the fuck is actually going on?

mechanic!jinx who hums approvingly into the kiss when you meet her lips in the middle. your hands go to the back of her head, tangling your fingers as if to ground yourself while she places her warm hands on your waist, tugging you to the point there’s no space between you. her lips move against yours in the middle ground between delicateness and recklessness, and it’s almost maddening how good, how right, it feels - though that thought is quickly brushed away as her lips part from yours to move to your jawline.

you readily welcome the tenderness of her touch as she presses delicate kisses from your jaw down to your neck. her lips find your pulse point, and the quiet sound it draws from your lips make jinx lift her head up quickly, meeting your eyes with a faint smirk. you glare at her playfully, and that’s all it takes for her to shake her head and swiftly resume, moving her hands closer to your hips to pull you flush to her.

“jinx there’s a customer asking for their keys out there, can you go-” ekko’s sentence ends midway as he enters the bay, his eyes landing on the two of you pressed against the side door of your car. 

mechanic!jinx who is unwilling to let go of you, one hand still gripped firmly on your hip and the other on your shoulder as you watch the scene unfold with an embarrassed flush. jinx glares daggers at the clueless boy, more pissed at the fact that she was interrupted than the fact she was caught. 

ekko puts his hands up in surrender. “i’ll see to it,” he says, doing little to stifle his snicker as he turns on his heel swiftly and walks out. jinx mutters something about getting him back, dropping the hand away from your shoulder as she turns back to you. you visibly deflate at the loss of contact, though the hand on your hip is unmoving as jinx, for the first time it seems, looks like she’s struggling to speak. 

“canitakeyouonadate,” she finally manages to blurt out, and your eyebrows raise at the unintelligible words.

“what was that?” you reply, tilting your head in confusion. 

“can i take you on a date,” jinx mumbles, barely able to keep eye contact with you as she repeats herself more clearly. 

your heart skips a beat at her words, but you’re not letting up that easily. “oh, could you repeat that? i didn’t quite catch it,” you playfully mock, not holding back the grin that makes its way to your face. 

jinx sends you a fleeting look before burying her head in your shoulder. “can i take you on a date?” she repeats, though her words are muffled, “please.” you giggle, both at the ticklish feeling and her antics as you nod slightly. “you may.”

she raises her head to meet your gaze, smiling slightly as you finally give in. “my car?” you tease. 

jinx raises an eyebrow. “absolutely not,” she snickers, shaking her head in mock disbelief at your suggestion, before leaning down to meet your lips again. 

a/n: finally, a post actually below 6k words ! i really need to stop starting to write one idea then getting too excited about another and jumping to that because i get nothing finished...anyways this is literally brain vomit i just had to get it out so not too sure abt the quality !! but if you enjoy pls be sure to comment/reblog, thanks for reading <3

(gifs by cafekitsune)

[snowysosturn]

Fire & Desire - Matt Sturniolo Part 13

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13

Pairing: Y/n x Matt Sturniolo

Summary: Y/n has always clashed with Matt. Despite working for Chris’s clothing brand and being close with Nick, her relationship with Matt has always been tense at best. While being forced to be around each other more, their animosity turns into something deeper. Can they overcome their differences, or will their fiery emotions tear them apart?

Warnings: angst, tension

The morning sun spilled through the sheer curtains, my head was still heavy from last night, and my body feeling sheer exhaustion of what had happened. I had barely slept, replaying the scene at the restaurant over and over in my mind. The embarrassment, the sting of Matt’s words, the way I had to walk away while holding back tears.

A soft knock at my door made me wake that bit more. "Hey, you awake?" I hear Nick’s voice from through the door. 

I remembered I locked it once Matt left last night so I pulled myself from my bed and unlocked the door letting Nick to come in. I turned and walked back to my bed, sitting up against the headboard, pulling the covers around me. Nick closed the door behind him before standing at the end of the bed. "Alright, spill. What the hell happened last night? You left, and then Matt stormed in looking like he just saw a ghost."

I exhaled, rubbing my temples before looking at him. "Your mom asked Nate if he was seeing anyone, and he said no, which was fine, right? But Matt decided to make it seem like that was some kind of rejection for me, like I was meant to be upset about it. Then, out of nowhere, he brings up to your mom and dad that Nate and I went on a ‘date’, which you know yourself wasn’t even a date, so then Nate tried to clarify that we were just friends, but Matt just kept pushing it. Then he said that I was a quick fuck and then friend zoned. Right in front of your parents." I swallowed, feeling the embarrassment all over again. 

Nick’s eyes widened slightly, but his expression darkened. "What the fuck?"

I scoffed, shaking my head. "Yeah and I’m so embarrassed if your parents heard that last part because first of all, I had just met them, and second of all, it’s just not even true. It made me look bad, it made Nate uncomfortable, and Matt acted like he had some right to embarrass me like that."

Nick sighed, running a hand through his hair. "No I get why you’re upset like he was way out of line. But listen, when Chris and I came back in, our parents said you were lovely and that they hoped you felt better soon. I’m telling you they didn’t hear that part."

I let out a slow breath of relief. "Really?"

"Really" Nick nodded. "They just thought you weren’t feeling well and needed to leave early."

I sank back into my pillows, finally feeling like I could breathe a little easier. "Good. Because I swear, I was ready to dig a hole and disappear forever."

Nick laughed. "Nah, no disappearing allowed. But are you gonna talk to Matt about it?"

I frowned, staring at the ceiling for a moment. "We did last night kinda, but I’m still so angry. And the worst part is, I don’t even know why he acted like that. It was like he wanted to embarrass me."

Nick shrugged. "Matt’s an idiot. He says dumb shit, but he also knows when he’s messed up. I guarantee you, he feels like shit about it right now."

"Good" I muttered, still unwilling to entertain the idea of forgiving him just yet.

Nick sighed again but didn’t push it further. "Alright, well, the four of us are going out with my parents for the day. You coming?"

I shook my head. "I think I’m just gonna stay back here today, I just want things to die down."

"Thats cool." He stood up, stretching. "Try not to overthink it too much, alright?"

I gave a half smile. "Easier said than done."

As Nick left the room, I rolled onto my side, staring out the window at the pool below. I knew I wouldn’t be able to just brush this off, but at least, for now, I could breathe a little easier knowing that Nick’s parents didn’t hear Matt’s words. Still, the anger remained, simmering just beneath the surface. Eventually, I decided I needed some air, some sun, some quiet, and a break from all the tension.

I slipped out of bed and grabbed my swimsuit, opting for a tiny bikini that I knew would be perfect for lounging by the pool. The straps sat snug against my skin, the warm morning air already filtering through the open balcony doors as I pulled my hair up out of my face. After tossing on a loose cover up, I slid into my sliders and grabbed a towel before heading downstairs.

As I reached the foyer, the others were gathered, chatting and getting ready to head out for the day. The energy in the room was light, filled with laughter and the occasional clatter of sunglasses being thrown into bags. As soon as they spotted me, they greeted me, well everyone except Matt, who didn’t even glance in my direction.

Chris was the first to speak. “You coming with us?” His tone was casual, but his eyes scanned my face like he was checking in.

I shook my head, adjusting my towel over my arm. “Nah, I think I’m going to take it easy today. Just chill by the pool and relax.”

Nate nodded approvingly. “Honestly? Probably the smarter move.”

Chris shot me a small smile. “Enjoy the sun. We’ll be back later.”

I returned the smile, forcing the tension from last night out of my mind. “You guys have fun.”

With that, they all filed out the front door, their voices fading as they disappeared down the steps. The villa was suddenly silent, the only sound being the faint rustling of palm trees outside.

I exhaled slowly before grabbing an ice tea from the fridge and making my way out to the pool, letting the warm sun wrap around me as I laid my towel down on one of the lounge chairs. Finally, peace and quiet.

I stretched out on the lounge chair, letting the sun soak into my skin as I sipped on the cold drink. I had left the villa door open, wanting to hear when everyone got back, but after a while, another sound caught my attention. 

A knock.

Frowning, I sat up, adjusting my bikini top before grabbing my cover up and slipping it over my hips. I wasn’t expecting anyone, and the guys wouldn’t have knocked, they had keys.

As I rushed barefoot across the cold tile floor, I hesitated for a second before pulling the door open. 

A mailman stood there, holding a large box. He barely glanced up before handing it over. “Delivery for Fresh Love.”

I furrowed my brows but took the package, feeling the weight of it in my arms. “Oh, thanks.”

With a nod, he turned and walked back down the driveway. I shut the door with my foot and carried the box to the kitchen counter, setting it down with a small thud.  I smirked, realizing this must be the personalized samples Chris had mentioned, the ones he ordered for all of us.  I pulled out my phone and snapped a quick picture of the box before opening up my messages with Chris.

Me: Personalised samples just got delivered.

A few seconds later, the typing bubbles appeared.

Chris: Sick! You check ‘em out yet?

I glanced at the box, debating if I should wait for him or just open it now.

Me: Not yet. Was gonna let you do the honours.

Chris: Okay cool. We can do a shoot with them at sunset later.

I bring the box up to Chris’ room and set it on the bed so he can see everything when we get back in. If we’re doing a shoot I want to look extra radiant and glowy, and that won’t happen from standing inside the villa. I grabbed one of the body oils in my room before making my way back out to the pool. I poured a little into my palm, rubbing it over my legs as I stretched back out on the lounge chair.

Matt’s POV

We were halfway through the guided tour when Chris suddenly checked his phone and said, “Oh, the personalized samples came in. Y/n just texted me.”

Hearing her name wasn’t helpful. Not when I hadn’t been able to get her off my mind since last night, and god how she looked in that bikini earlier didn't help. I kept my eyes straight ahead, pretending I didn’t care, but my mom didn’t let it slide. “Oh, Y/n is such a lovely girl” she said with a warm smile, then turned to me. “Is she feeling better now, sweetheart?”

Before I could even begin to answer, Nick cut in smoothly. “Yeah, she’s fine. Just needed a bit of sleep.” His tone was light, brushing off the question like it wasn’t worth pressing. He knew me well enough to know that I didn’t want to talk about it, especially not here, not in front of everyone.

I kept my mouth shut and just nodded in agreement, though the truth was, I felt far from fine. Guilt sat heavy in my chest, chipping away at me. Last night, I had let my emotions get the best of me. I let jealousy, because let’s be honest, that’s exactly what it was, take control, and I lashed out in the worst way possible. I had said something cruel, something I couldn’t take back. And knowing Y/n, she wasn’t the type to just let it roll off her shoulders. She put up walls, and I had given her every reason to keep me on the other side of them.

The more I thought about it, the worse it got. I had no right to be mad at her, no right to act like what she did or didn’t do with Nate, or anyone else for that matter, was any of my business. But that hadn’t stopped me from taking a low blow, from making her feel small in front of people who barely even knew her. If she had done that to me, I’d be furious. So what did that say about me?

I exhaled, dragging a hand through my hair as I barely registered the tour guide’s voice. My mind was somewhere else entirely.

I had to make this right.

I knew I had a way to make it up to her, it was something I should've done ages ago. And now, I could only hope it wasn’t too late for her to forgive me.

Y/n’s POV

I was sitting outside on the patio, a plate of food in my lap as I watched the sun dip below the horizon. The sky was painted in soft shades of pink and orange, the kind of sunset that made everything feel a little quieter, a little more peaceful. It was one of those moments I wished I could freeze in time, just me, the sunset, and the distant sound of waves hitting onto the shore.

But then, the front door swung open, breaking the stillness.

The familiar sounds of shuffling feet and tired voices filled the villa as the guys returned. I set my plate aside and stood up, making my way inside to greet them.

“Hey” I said, leaning against the kitchen counter as they walked in.

They all looked exhausted, Chris, Nate, Matt, and Nick, their faces slightly sunburnt, their hair tousled from the slight breeze and even though they didn’t say much at first, their body language said it all.

Chris let out a heavy sigh, running a hand through his hair as he took his cap off. “Long day,” he muttered. “We were out in the sun for way too long, and I think it’s catching up to everyone.”

Nate groaned in agreement, tossing his sunglasses onto the counter. “I need, like, ten hours of sleep.”

Matt didn’t say much, just nodded, his jaw tight. He looked at me for half a second before glancing away, like he was trying to avoid something, most likely me. I ignored the sting in my chest and forced a small smile.

“Yeah, we’re all wiped” Nick added, stretching his arms above his head. “Think we’ll just stay in tonight, order some takeout, crash early.”

“That’s fine with me” I said, realizing I was more drained than I thought. Between being in the sun all day and everything that happened last night, I could use a quiet night too. “I left that box in your room” I say turning to Chris.

“Cool I’ll have a look now, we can take pictures tomorrow evening instead, when everyones a bit more awake”

And with that, Chris, Nate, and Matt didn’t waste any time disappearing into their rooms, clearly eager to knock out for a bit.

Nick lingered behind, rubbing the back of his neck. “I’m gonna shower first, but after that, I’ll come to your room? We can just chill for a bit, a movie maybe?.”

I nodded. “Sounds good.”

I walk up to my room, kicking the door shut behind me as I switch on the TV. The smart TV mounted on the wall was a lifesaver, especially on nights like this when there wasn’t much going on. I sink onto the bed, remote in hand, sifting through Netflix, too see if theres anything both Nick and I would like. The knock on the door wasn’t enough to pull my attention from the screen since I assume it’s Nick, I don’t even think twice before calling out, “Come in.”

But it’s not Nick.

It’s Matt.

He stands there in the doorway, looking uncertain, a silver metallic gift bag dangling from his fingers. Looking like the same one I spotted in his room next to my ‘Thank You’ card. For a moment, neither of us speak. We just stare at each other, the weight of unspoken words thick in the space between us.

My tone is blunt when I finally ask, “Are you alright?”

Matt doesn’t answer. Instead, he lifts the bag slightly, as if offering it to me. His expression is unreadable, something between nervousness and determination.

“What is it?” I ask, narrowing my eyes.

“Just look in it” he says quietly.

I hesitate for a second before reaching out, taking the metallic bag from his grasp. Peeling back the layers of tissue paper inside, my breath catches in my throat.

It’s my locket.

The delicate chain pools in my palm, the pendant glinting from the sunset shining in my balcony window. My fingers tighten around it as I snap my gaze back up to Matt, my heart pounding.

“Where did you get this?” I demand, my voice barely above a whisper.

a/n : most of this is a bit of a filler soz

taglist : @mattybearnard @sturn-33 @ncm9696 @yourfavsturniologirl @crazy4jewel @sodakid1234 @stupendoustreewinner @lovealwayssturniolos @matthewsturniolosss @m4ttsmunch @loveexxx @ilusa @starkeyszn @wonnieeluvvr @dylnblue @valxrieq @maggot3647 @cigarettecemetary @ribread03 @chrisstvrns @bandasaruswrx @noplaceissafeanymore @amexiass @witchofthehour @mattssgf @jetaimevous @v33angel  @ivysturnss @urmom69lol @ashlishes @watercolorskyy @sturnioloshottiekay @amelia-sturniolo3 @imjusthereforthesturniolosmut @pvssychicken @alizestvrnss @chrisstxrnsaxe @sophand4n4 @vickytaa @marrykisskilled @bxtchboy69 @yourfavsturniologirl @julisturn @sydneyylainn @sophia-77n @trevorsgodmother @sturnslutz @yourmother29 @girl24cherry @astronea @pinkdyit

[moody-alcoholic]

Cross My Heart

Part 11 - More Then Friends

Summary: eventual poly141 x reader. Enemies to lovers, mini fic.

CW: mentions of blood, its all fluff.

Previous parts - masterlist - next AO3

Enjoy <3

Price, Ghost and Gaz left first. Leaving before the sun was up in a somewhat hectic rush. Their plan was to get over the border then commandeer a car or something. Price said it could be a few days before you hear from them but they will send word. 

Soap sulked down the stairs an hour or so later, when the sun was just peaking through the clouds. You can’t wait to leave here and never come back. The whole blood soaked place can burn to the ground for all you care.

“They left already.” You say as he comes to sit on the sofa next to you.

“I know. Si- Ghost came to say bye.” He shuffles on the couch rubbing his burnt arm. You’ll need to change the dressing before you leave. “We should get going soon. We need to get a car. It’s easier to do while it’s still dark out.” 

You follow Soap’s orders in silence, the lack of sleep is finally catching up with you. You change the dressing as Soap grits his teeth complaining about itching. You have no idea if it’s healing or if its still supposed to look the way it does. It’s only been a day or so anyway. 

When you’re done Soap steals some supplies- mostly food -from the safehouse and you set out to look for a vehicle. It doesn’t take you long to find a rather old looking car, you keep an eye out while Soap hotwires it like he’s done this a thousand times. Before you know it you’re on the road driving back to Sakhra.

“What’re you thinking about?” He asks after at least an hour of silence, you were starting to doze off. His question jolts you awake and you look over at him. 

“Why did you kiss me?” You ask. He smiles.

“I just had to, you’re stunning lass.” He says, it makes you blush. You turn to look out the window of the car. 

“Don’t falter me, a few days ago you would have put a bullet in my head.” 

“Yeah, we’re not merciless killers though.” You scoff, they’re soldiers, they're trained killers. You sit there in silence. 

“You’re a good kisser.” He says suddenly. 

“What- I mean. It was just a kiss.” You say feeling embarrassed, he just laughs. That annoys you, he’s being so chill about it, what if Price found out? What if he finds out then decides you’re a liability?

“You all seem close.” You say trying to move the subject on from you and Johnny. 

“Closer than you think.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” 

“We’re a close unit. Worked together for years. When you spend so much time together, you develop a strong relationship.” He says switching between watching the road and your expression. You have an eyebrow raised, you expected him to continue. 

“Brothers in arms right?” You say, you’ve heard that before from soldiers.

“More than that.” You shake your head scoffing. He’s playing with you, trying to wind you up. What's closer than brothers? 

“You fucking each other or somthing.” You joke back. He doesn’t say anything, you turn back to look at him frowning. He’s just smiling, the cheekiest grin you think you’ve ever seen. “Really? You’re messing with me.” He just laughs, it doesn’t help you decide if he’s joking or not.

You let out a sigh looking out at the winding road. You’re not far now.

____

When you make it back to the ULF base the place is almost empty. You both head straight to the doctor who fixes your stitches and tends to Soap’s arm as well as giving him a pot of burn cream and instructions. 

When you’re done you both go to see Farah. Alex is with her, they both look tired. The table is filled with maps dotted with big red X’s. You look round as Soap catches them up on what happened. You wonder if Price has sent word yet, you hope they’re okay.

“-We take out Konni, before they make it any further south.” Farah says, you look over at them, catching the end of the conversation. 

“We don’t know if Konni are moving or not. Price will be able to give us some idea.” Soap says.

“We could be waiting days for that.” Alex says crossing his arms, he doesn’t have a sling anymore, maybe his arm was just sprained.

“They attacked their own bases?” You ask pointing at the map. 

“They want to shift the blame to us.” Farah says.

“The fact they used American weapons on civilians has got the US all wound up.” Alex says.

“They’re spreading us thin, I’ve already lost 20 men. We can’t fight them on the front without leaving ourselves open to attacks.” Farah sighs.

“You have weapons from the US, why not fight back?” You ask. There’s silence, people look around at you like you’ve just asked them to do something impossible. 

“If we fire on them we lose our advantage.” She says.

“Which is?” Soap asks.

“If the Americans come, they won’t be after us.” She says. You look down at the map, the new line Al Qatala have formed. There’s no news if Konni or Al Qatala forces have made a move from the border, it seems like they’re waiting for the ULF to make a move first. 

It’s too many targets for Farah to handle alone. 

“What about hitting them at the source? Take out the rest of their weapons.” You say pointing at the farm you know they’ve been storing munitions and rockets.

“They were fired from Russia.” Alex said.

“No, they were fired from inside the country. I bet if it's going to be anywhere it’s there.” You tap the map. Farah and Alex look at eachother. 

“A full scale raid is not possible.” She says, stepping back from the table.

“We could go in quiet.” Soap says. “Just the 4 of us.” 

“The place will be heavily guarded. They could have also moved them elsewhere.” Farah says.

“Even if we don’t find the missiles we will deal a pretty big blow to their resources.” Soap says. “You need all the help you can get.” 

“Okay. Tonight, you should get some rest.” Farah says. Soap smiles at her and Alex. He grabs your arm gently pulling you out of the room. You’re heading down to the sleeping quarters before Soap grabs your arm pulling you into a store room. 

“Hey!” You call, you almost trip over something as his hands grab your shoulders and he pushes you up against the wall. Before you have a chance to say anything his lips lock onto yours. His kiss is needy, his tongue pressing into your mouth. You hum, closing your eyes and letting your hands drop to his waist. 

“Johnny.” You breathe as he pulls his lips off you, his mouth moving to your neck. His hands 

“What?” He asks, he’s not stopping though, running his tongue up your neck.

“What if Price found out?” 

“What do you mean?” He says. “Want him to join, I reckon he’ll be down for that.” He chuckles, now you’re convinced he's winding you up. You push your hands up his shirt and he grip your waist, his fingers digging into your skin, you’re sure he’ll be leaving marks. You run your fingers up his chest, feeling each muscle and scar. He’s hairy, you don’t care, now you’re getting needy, his lips running over you sucking on the sensitive spots on your neck. 

He looks up down at you, his hands come to hold your face. “I’m so glad I got you first. I thought I was going to have to fight off Gaz, or Price.” You frown at him but before you can press him further he kisses you. You drop your hands from his chest, gripping his waist and pulling him closer to you. 

Suddenly there’s a knock at the door. You freeze, you didn’t think anyone knew you were in here.

“Soap? There’s word from Price.” it’s Alex’s voice. Johnny smiles down at you.

“We’ll finish this later.” He says quietly before reaching over to open the door. You feel yourself blushing as Alex raises an eye at you both. Johnny slaps him on the shoulder and they walk away.

next Banners by plum98

[bybobbysbeard]

Cooldown

Day 3 for @bucktommyfluffebruary: spiderman kiss. read on ao3 read other days here

Buck opens his eyes to the familiar view of his boyfriend’s bedroom’s popcorn ceiling. Morning sunlight slants across the walls. Buck stretches, reaching out, but the sheets beside him are cool. The house is quiet. 

Tommy's home is tiny. It’s a two bedroom bungalow, set on a pie-shaped lot in a friendly Van Nuys suburb. Tommy’s put a lot of work into it. Maybe not the same way Buck would have, if he owned a house, but he can still appreciate what his boyfriend has prioritized. The eat-in kitchen is still very 90s, with golden oak cabinets and a tiled backsplash in a pale dusty rose, but the appliances are newer. The bedrooms are done up in warm tones, and the living room is dominated by a massive sectional and a giant TV. Most of the furniture is secondhand, worn and scratched, but well taken care of. 

Buck likes to call the house cozy, just to see Tommy smile. 

The backyard and garage have had more effort put in. There's the brickwork patio Tommy laid himself, a nice BBQ setup that even Bobby would be jealous of, and a couple of mature sycamore trees dotted around. Tommy told him how he ripped all the sod out years ago, and spent a few incredibly sweaty days planting frogfruit starters for groundcover. Now the lawn is lush, and fully native. The fences are edged with hardy, drought-friendly perennials and long grasses. 

The garage is a snapshot into Tommy’s hobbies. One half is mostly taken up by Tommy’s car lift, a long stainless steel work bench with half a dozen projects in various states of completion, and two giant Stanley tool chests. The other side has Tommy's home gym setup, including a few different pieces of equipment, and a clear area with mats for sparing. 

He takes his time getting going. It's a peaceful morning, and although Tommy has a shift in a few hours, Buck doesn't have anywhere to be until 8:00 am tomorrow. One of the hazards of dating another first responder is the conflicting schedules, so being able to lock the house up behind him when he has to leave at ass-o’clock in the morning has been great. Tommy told him the code to the garage door a few weeks ago. 

The knowledge that he’s welcome in Tommy’s space makes something warm curl in his belly.

There’s a pot of coffee waiting for him when he makes his way to the kitchen, and the pre-workout mix and protein powder sitting on the counter gives a clue as to where his wayward boyfriend is. He pours a mug, slips on a pair of slides, and enters the garage. 

The big door is lifted about a foot, showing a strip of sun-drenched driveway on the other side. There’s music playing, some guitar-heavy ‘Dad Rock’ Buck will mock him for later. Tommy notices his entrance, giving him a quick grin before finishing his rep. Buck opens his mouth to say good morning, but gets stuck. He just woke up, so he’ll blame the goofy record-scratch sound effect he imagines on his half-asleep brain. 

Tommy’s doing bicep curls, dressed in that damned grey sleeveless hoodie and a pair of baggy athletic shorts. That shirt haunts Buck. He flashes back to that fateful basketball game, when he was so jealous. Desperate for something he couldn’t even name. Naturally, Tommy’s worn it since, and every time Buck has a visceral, gut-deep reaction. More than once, it’s ended with them tangled up together, in bed, on the couch, on the floor, or the backseat of one of their cars. Once, on Buck’s dining room table. Nothing between them but sweat. The fact that he’s wearing it now, when he knew Evan would be up soon, sends a shiver racing up his spine, despite the heat in the garage. 

Tommy exhales, lowering his arms and moving towards the weight rack. The gaping arm hole offers a tantalizing glimpse of skin as he re-racks the dumbells.

“Morning baby. How’d you sleep?” 

Buck forces his attention away from Tommy’s chest and back up to his face. The smirk that’s waiting tells him his staring was not subtle. He takes a sip of his coffee. His ears feel hot. “G-good morning. I slept great. I was just going to start breakfast. Any requests?”

“Whatever you feel like making sounds good to me. I’m almost done. Just going to use the bench and then cooldown.” Sweat makes one curl stick to his forehead. 

This Clark Kent looking motherfucker.

Buck carefully sets his mug down. “You want a spotter?” He’s holding onto his pokerface by the skin of his teeth. Sure, he wants to make sure his boyfriend is exercising safely, but damn, he also wants to ogle. Tommy quirks an eyebrow. His teeth flash when he smiles.

“Sure. Help me load the plates?”

Some 250lbs of steel later, Tommy is laid out on the bench and gripping the bar. He looks up at Buck, hovering needlessly close, and hums thoughtfully. He releases the bar, sits up, and grabs the hem of his hoodie. He pulls it off in one smooth move, before balling it up and throwing it towards the door. For the second time in five minutes, Buck’s brain fuzzes out, TV static replacing every thought that isn't TommyTommyTommy. All that pale olive skin is on display, shiny with sweat, making Tommy’s chest hair curl in the humidity. Tommy lays back down, muscles rippling as he settles and rolls his shoulders. Buck’s gaze chases that tempting happy trail, leading under the damp waistband of Tommy’s shorts. 

“Evan, you good?” Tommy grabs the bar again.

Buck has to swallow, or risk drooling on his boyfriends grinning face. Not fair. Ah, fuck it. 

“No. I am not good.”

He swoops down, pressing his lips to Tommy’s upside down, but too desperate to care about circling around the bench. One hand lands on top of Tommy’s where it's still wrapped around the bar, but his other dances down that broad chest, tweaking a nipple to make Tommy jump. It’s a little strange, kissing like this. But it’s Tommy. Tommy’s mouth, Tommy’s stubble, Tommy’s tongue meeting his and deepening the kiss. It's so easy to get lost in it. 

Eventually, they have to breathe. Tommy’s other hand has wound into his curls, keeping him close. His voice is low, a promise that settles deep in Buck’s core, “If I didn’t have a shift…”

Buck hums in agreement, pressing a smacking kiss to Tommy’s forehead. He straightens up, and smiles down at his boyfriend. There’s a flush across his lovely cheekbones and stubble burn on his upper lip. They both stare at each other for a minute, cooling down.

“So, pancakes?” 

[chronicallyonline101]

hiiii!!! if u feel like writing it i would love to request some rohan x fem reader headcanons or scenario where rohan's gf is also an artist but she's way more inexperienced than him. ty <3333

hi!!! i would love to do this it sounds so sweet! I am SO sorry for the wait, i've been pretty busy, BUT it's here now and i hope you enjoy!

Kishibe Rohan x Fem!Reader || Scenario + HCs - mostly scenario.

As much as it pains him to see you desecrate art in the way you do, I think Rohan would enjoy being with someone who is inexperienced in art.

Thanks to his career, and his stand, Rohan is naturally one of the best people there is at this kind of thing - people compliment him for it all the time, but it's special when it comes from someone he loves.

He wants your approval, and thanks to your inexperience, you're full of it; every time he creates something you're clapping your hands and singing praise and he devours it every single time.

However, it may be a little frustrating for him when you do start dabbling in the world of craft because wow, you really are new to this. That painting of a dog looks like a deformed cow.

He would offer to teach you, and you'd accept; but that would quickly fall down the drain because he has a very specific way of drawing - using Heavens Door - that literally no one else on Earth could achieve.

He also believes his art style is the best, and would try to convince you to use that instead of learning your own style.

But anyways, I can't think of any more HCs so lets just get on with what I'm good at - THE SCENARIO:

There was something so calming about art - the craft, the technique, the aptitude; each fine brush of paint against canvas, a blotch of ink to paper. It was soothing, and you felt silly for having only just picked up the hobby.

It was nice knowing that even with your inexperience, you could still create. And that's what you had been doing, that very afternoon - though late into the day, the sun continued to hang high in the air. Gentle golden rays of shimmering light flittered through your open window, splaying itself across your splattered canvas.

A smile settled across your lips at the sight, pressing a thin brush to the fabric for the last, small details. The lighting was perfect, displaying a visage of your boyfriend in the elegance he deserved - while you dipped your brush into a cup of water to clean it, you found yourself hoping that the sun would remain once you had made it to his place.

Yesterday, you had bought a fresh set of utensils; it had taken some brief self-encouragement, but in the late hours of the night you had picked them up and started sketching. With no real motif in mind, it hadn't surprised you to find a portrait of your partner sat before you. He had the face of a model; the kind of looks that were easy to detail, and though you hadn't slept a single wink last night, your efforts had paid off now that the work was done.

This was probably your best piece yet. Eagerly, you plucked the portrait from it's frame, wrapped it in thin, grease-proof paper to stop it from smudging, and tucked it into a large portfolio bag.

It took you no time at all to throw a jacket over your shoulders and slip out of the door - though the sun was high and the air was warm, there was a small breeze that flittered through the air, dragging along with it small, dry leaves and puffy clouds of pollen, a sign that soon, Spring would find itself curling around Morioh.

On a usual day, you'd likely find yourself bumping into a few friends or acquaintances on your way through the small town, but today you weren't bothered much. You supposed most of your friends would still be in work - blessed as you were to have a job that didn't involve a commute. It took you only a few minutes to reach your boyfriends house, and with a giddy smile held the large portfolio behind your back as you knocked at the door.

Kishibe Rohan didn't like being bothered.

Unless he was expecting someone, the likelihood of him opening his door to a random knocker was low; there was simply no need to. If it was urgent, they could call his landline.

When it came to you, however, he didn't mind being bothered. Living only a few minutes down the street from him, the two of you would frequently visit each others houses - you, more so coming to him than he did to you. It wasn't that he didn't enjoy visiting you, he was just always so busy during the day with his work and he knew that you would definitely come to him if you needed company.

Such is why you had a special knock - you would rap your first against the door in a particular rhythm, a melody unique to you, and he would recognise immediately who it was at his door.

Stuck in a block of what to do for his manga; hearing you knock at his door brought forth relief in his soul. As frustrating as it was to take a break from his important work, he at least at the restraint to recognise that perhaps a break was needed.

He wasn't sure what to expect when opening the front door to his house, but, seeing you try - and fail - to hide a rather large portfolio bag behind your back was not it. He eyed you up and down, growing sceptical.

"And what is that?" He inquired, tilting his body forward - a weak attempt at trying to see inside the bag. You quickly caught onto his snooping, and shifted the bag out of his view.

"Just wait," Was your gleeful chirp, ushering him aside so that you could flitter inside his house. Kicking off your shoes by the front door so that you could at least retain some semblance of respect, you quickly made your way past his stairs and into the main living area.

Startled, it took him a moment to clip the door shut once you had entered. He eyed you through his peripherals, before moving toward the kitchen.

"I'll put on some tea then."

"Oh, yes please!" You called out. With him distracted, you made swift work of unwrapping the portrait you had made - setting it up so that the fabric canvas was leant against the top of his coffee table.

It took a few seconds of setting up, but eventually, you had everything perfect. The canvas was angled in such a way that it bathed in the suns radiant glow. You stood in front of the picture, facing the doorway to the room; a cocky grin splayed itself across your lips when Rohan re-entered the room, a tray of tea clutched tightly in his hands.

He paused in the doorway. There was still a lilt of suspicion to his glare - he was unsure of what you were doing, but knew that you were up to something.

Slowly edging his way further into the room, Rohan placed the tray of tea on a table near the couch - a different one from the one you had been using for your artwork.

He crossed his arms over his chest, and with his brows furrowed, cocked his head to the side. "Can I see now?"

Giggling, you uttered out a jovial: "Yes!" And took a step to the side, allowing Rohan a full view of your artwork. "Look, I made you;"

Upon hearing that you had taken the time to make a portrait of him, Rohan's eyes lit up - he was a vain man, and the thought that you had been thinking of him enough to craft a portrait in his image pleased him greatly.

However, his excitement was quick to fade when he lay his gaze across the artwork. "Oh-!"

He gasped, his expression turning sour - the kind of sour where he had to bite his cheeks to stop himself from saying anything unsavoury. "Uh, that's... me?"

"Mhm! Do you like it?" You nodded your head, eager to hear his praises - It would be obvious that Rohan was exceptional at art, and so, you sought his approval more than anyone else's. His silence proved to be discouraging.

"It's certainly," He wanted to praise you, he really did. But, it was just so unflattering! Did you even look at a reference when you were making it, or were you doing it from memory? Or worse, did you have a pixelated polaroid? He couldn't even call it abstract, it was worse than that!

He swallowed thickly. "Well... it's,"

Your expression dropped, turning narrow the longer it took him to muster up a compliment. You crossed your arms over your chest, and with a huff, spoke out dully:

"I spent all night on it."

"Did you sleep last night?" His gaze flickered from the portrait to you. There wasn't concern in his tone, what you did in your spare time didn't bother him - you were an adult, and knew better than to stay awake late at night. He wasn't going to police you around like a parent.

When you shook your head, he clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth. "Ah... that explains it,"

His attitude was infuriating you. You had spent an entire night on that painting, and he couldn't even think of one nice thing to say? You were sure if you took it to anyone else, they would compliment it - but of course, you just had to try and impress the great and amazing Kishibe Rohan.

"Explains what?" You grumbled, rolling your eyes to the side sarcastically. He didn't take kindly to your sass, but spoke nothing on the matter.

Instead, he walked to the other side of the room. Prying open a set of drawers to pull out a small, A-4 notebook and a thin ink-pen. Your eyes followed his lithe figure as he walked back toward you, narrowing in suspicion when he then sat on the couch; moving a pillow out the way so you could sit next to him. You didn't give in to what he wanted.

"You mustn't spent all night on these things," He reprimanded, frowning when he realised you were being petty. He was only trying to teach you: "It wears you out. You need to take breaks to ensure your skill doesn't deplete."

You said nothing on the matter. Huffing in disapproval. You didn't need to be taught, you just wanted appraisal - when he realised you weren't coming, he rolled his eyes and repeated a small:

"Look, come here," But offered no chance for you to move of your own accord. An invisible force seemed to push you forward, guiding you rather forcefully toward the couch where you were then plonked down.

Before you could even register what was happening, you found yourself flushing. His hand had coiled its way around your back and he held your hand with his, slipping the ink-pen between your fingers. He used your hand as a sort of puppet; pressing the tip of the pen to the paper gently.

With his lips close to your ear, Rohan murmured a quiet: "I'll show you how." You were flustered, but made no move to stop him - maybe your inexperience was a good thing after all.

[lizziekelso]

Sunny Landscape Room

A bed under a starry sky ⭐

Night and day are separated by a brilliant glowing window well. A sun-warmed beanbag chair under the window is a comfy spot to read a book

Fluffy clouds dot the sky. Green hills roll over my work desk and bookshelves. The non-functional fireplace has been repainted a brilliant blue

Trees, clouds, and artificial grass form a backdrop for my collection of rocks and 3D art

A sun lamp borders the forest window well, where I'm keeping my easel for now. The room's light switch sits on the trunk of a tree that reaches up to the ceiling next to the door

The canopy of the trees is relaxing in person but difficult to capture in photographs. I think it would be cool to put a hammock in here

At some point, I'll come back and paint more plants and creatures in the forest section. But for now, I can declare this project done!

I leave you with a photo of this stunning glow that still surprises me even though I've been living with it for a month now

[capcollector]

we could make this place beautiful

thinking about when bunny finally gets a day off, but she has no idea what to do with it. like prewar she was constantly working, after she woke up she had her whole journey getting shaun back, after all that she focused her energy into building up sanctuary and assisting the minutemen and railroad with establishing more community, driving out the brotherhood presence, in-between all that always going on supply runs and random quests……and she wouldn’t have it any other way. every minute was worth it. she loves being busy, and in some ways it is partially so she can just keep her mind off other things, but she genuinely just loves doing stuff. she gets stir crazy easily.

but there comes a point several months after the BoS is gone where there is just. relative quiet. there’s a collective sigh of relief, and she’s so thankful for it, but she’s not sure what to do now. she fills her time w a lot of smaller projects, like patching up parts in buildings and repainting some things, setting up/fixing furniture. she’s still a few weeks away from her due date atp so it’s not like she has a newborn to fill up her time just yet either. and eventually deacon sits her down and tells her to take a day for herself, for her own sake. she’s tired, even if she doesn’t want to admit it. you’ve done more than enough. rest. so whether she likes it or not, she’s faced w the first day off she’s had in over 200 years. and it drives her up a fucking wall. deacon tells her to just relax but she’s like. a little worried she forgot how. she almost feels bad for taking a day, like there’s so much she could be doing. but she promises him she’ll take the day off.

i think she spends a majority of the day w shaun. it’s not like she doesn’t spend time w him normally—he often tags along when she’s working on small projects in sanctuary—but today it’s just all about the two of them. eventually duncan and maccready tag along for a bit bc shaun and duncan like playing together, and bunny and mac always enjoy spending time together. just chatting while watching their kids play. the day goes on, the sun begins to set. mac has to go for his lookout shift at the red rocket, duncan and shaun decide to go inside and read some comics, and bunny is left alone.

and i think that’s when it hits her. she’s watching the sun set across the water, across the skyline of concord. the sky’s a pale blue, oranges and pinks bouncing off the clouds. the air is cool and crisp and it’s a beautiful evening…and she just starts crying. her grief finally catches up to her. it’s in this moment she understands she will never see her mother, her old friends, nora ever again. they won’t be able to meet her children, or laugh at their old inside jokes, or share a drink ever again. bunny wouldn’t change a day of what she’s been through; it was worth it to get here. it was worth it to make this place what it is now. but what she wouldn’t give for just one more day. one more day to say goodbye and hold them close, one more day to let the people from her past know they’re what made her into who she is now. one more day to say i love you, thank you for everything.

[callme-holly]

Idk if you’ve done this but Dallas Winston x Pastors Daughter ? 👀👀

𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐥 𝐞𝐲𝐞𝐬 [𝐝𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐧 𝐱 𝐩𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐝𝐚𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐞𝐫]

a/n: I LOVED THIS OMG PLEASE MORE REQUESTS LIKE THIS. NO JOKE THIS IS MY NEW FAV FIC

Nobody has ever expected Dallas to end up with a girl like you, not at all. You were everything he wasn’t: you were sweet, gentle, and kind. You deserved someone more than a hoodlum from a bad background… And yet you never push him away, not even when he comes knocking at your window long after the sun has set, just like tonight.

He looks so incredibly out of place on your bed, his dirtied jeans and dark shirt a stark contrast to your soft, silken sheets. His blonde hair fans out across the pillow as he stretches back, and he looks almost angelic under the dim, honey-coloured glow of your lamp, which is impossible as Dallas Winston is anything but. 

He watches you carefully from across the room as you stand at your vanity, brushing out your curls as they fall around your face in a way that makes you look almost etheral. "Are you going to come join me, or what?" He grumbles, his gaze travelling down the length of your body, admiring the way your night gown  clings to your curves, the pure white of the fabric contrasting sweetly with everything else about you, still keeping that modest image about you.

“Just a moment,” you mutter, your eyes meeting his in the mirror, and he finds himself transfixed, unable to tear his eyes away. You look perfect, like something written by the angels and sent straight down from heaven,  all soft pink lips and   smooth skin. 

"There." You finally say once you've finished brushing out your hair, letting it fall down your back as you turn to walk towards him. He grins, shifting to make room for you, his arm winding around your waist as you settle on his chest, your hand smoothing over the side of his face.

"You know, you look fine. You don't have to spend so long putting yourself together."  His voice is rough and low in the quiet of the room, and he smells faintly of smoke and leather. You feel your heart flutter in your chest, like thousands of butterflies have been released, set free, and are now  flying in every direction.

"I've got church in the morning. I need to look  my best." Your fingers trail up the column of his neck, your eyes following the movement, and Dallas huffs a laugh, catching your wrist.

"Says who?"

"Says my father." You give him a knowing look, effectively cutting him off as he rolls his eyes, letting his head flop back once more.

"Oh please. If he knew true beauty, he'd let you go as you are now."  A smirk plays at his mouth, and his hands wander up your sides slowly before settling on your hips. He pulls you closer, your chest pressed flush against his, and your breath catches as his fingers trace the delicate shape of your hipbones. 

"Where's this coming from?" You ask suddenly, a lilt of teasing  in your voice. "What's gotten into you? You're never this sweet."

Dallas hums, pressing his lips to the side of your jaw, lingering for a moment as he speaks. "Just trying to charm my way into your perfect little household."  You laugh in spite of yourself, swatting his hand away before it continues exploring your body.

"You really can't help yourself, can you?"  

He shrugs, moving to kiss your neck. "Nope."  When he lifts his head again, Dallas gives you a smile, the corners of his lips quirking upwards. "Can I stay here tonight, or do you need to be at church early tomorrow?"  

You smile softly in return, your fingers combing through his hair absently. "You can stay. But you better be gone before my father wakes up. He'll go mad if he sees you." 

He nods, but his attention is elsewhere, drifting to the Bible on your bedside table. He reaches over and grabs it, mindful not to damage it, and you watch him with raised brows. 

"What're you doing?"

He doesn't answer you, merely opening to a random page and running his finger slowly along the words, something akin to wonder taking over his features. You've never seen him handle something with such care, and the last thing you'd ever expected was for him to show so much interest in your religion.

"You should come with us some time, you know..." you speak gently, not wanting to force anything onto him, knowing your attempts at inviting him to church are futile, and sure enough, he shakes his head, closing the book again and setting it back on your nightstand.

"Nah. Not my scene, angel." His tone is casual, and he lounges back once more, pulling you along with him. His hand trails up along your side,  tracing small circles on your skin, and you shudder beneath his touch. 

"It'd do you good, I think." You try,  giving him a hopeful look. He smiles, looking at you with that same expression he always wears whenever you're trying to convince him to join you , and you instantly know this conversation isn't going anywhere. 

He leans down and presses a kiss to your lips, lingering for a few seconds before pulling away. "Not my style."  His tone is firm, and you nod reluctantly, knowing he's right. Dallas Winston does not belong in a church. 

You rest your head on his chest, letting out a soft sigh and tracing little patterns into the fabric of his shirt. Your eyes grow heavy, content settling over you like a wave lapping at the shore, the steady rise and fall of his chest lulling you into a state of pure bliss and ease.

"I could get used to this," you mumble, and Dallas hums in response, a sound of agreement that fills you with a small sense of hope.

Your family would never agree with  this arrangement: you and him, the pastor's daughter and a criminal. But even if  they didn't approve, he knew, deep down, you wouldn't ever give up on him. Because your angel eyes saw the good in many devils... 

[highpope]

Biker!JJ x Reader

based on this ask, thanks anon!

warnings: swearing, motorbike racing/stunts, scared reader notes: i don't even know what this is, i got carried away. enjoy

“Okay, odds,” your friend Sarah had said when the two of you sat down on the risers. You had both decided to get last minute tickets to the bike show that was touring through town. Neither of you were that interested, but thought it’d be fun to see the race and some stunts. 

“Odds what?”

"What are the odds you go into that?” She asked, pointing to an area outside of the track. There was a giant metal sphere that had two bikers riding inside. They moved, calculated and confident in circles, going upside down and crisscrossing. 

Your mouth basically fell open, “None. Absolutely not.” 

Sarah laughed, “C’mon, humor me. Pick a range.”

You sigh, “one to one-hundred.”

“Really?” She looked at me like I was the one being unreasonable. 

I nodded and started counting down from three. 1…2…3… “Sixty-seven.”

“Sixty-seven.” 

“Fuck,” you mumbled. 

----------

And that’s how you found yourself standing off to the side of “The Globe of Death,” waiting for the attendant to let you in.

You sighed as you wiped the sweat off your palms on your jeans. The sun had gone down the whole way now, leaving the beach illuminated only by the spotlights set up by the tour around the racing track and the neon lights on the bikes. At least that meant no one could see how scared you looked. You can’t believe this was happening to you. “Alright, sweetheart” the man called out to me, “you done this before?” You shook your head, breathless.

“Just stand right on the X and don’t put your arms out.”

Okay, duh. You just nod, unable to speak without fear you would call the whole thing off. “Alright, Maybank! She’s all yours!” The man yells as the hinge to the dome starts to lift. 

You carefully step inside, taking the hand of the rider to help pull yourself up. You mumble a “thanks” that you’re sure no one heard and stand on the green tape in the middle of the dome. It was even bigger on the inside. Incredibly intimidating.

You couldn’t see any of his other features, but his deep blue eyes met yours instantly. He winks and you're not sure how you know, but you can tell he’s smiling under his helmet. Your cheeks blaze red as you divert your eyes.

Maybank revs the engine on his bike and the crowd outside goes crazy. He accelerates, building momentum as he drives around the walls. You jump, caught off guard, the countdown drowned out by the noise. The whirlwind of neon blue lights that outline the bike fly around you in circles. At first the stunts are more careful, staying quite a large distance away from you as he rides up and down the walls of the dome. In an instant he’s closer, almost parallel with you. If he reached out he could grab your arm. The thought alone makes you feel nauseous. Everything starts to blur as you feel yourself panic more and more. You needed to get out of here. The biker gets closer, making the crowd gasp and your hands shoot up to cover your face. No, no, no, no, no. “Hey, hey!” Someone yells. You slowly drop your hands from your face to see that everything has stopped. The music is still playing over the speakers, but the crowd is no longer yelling and the engine of the bike has been turned off. You lift your head to see the rider has removed his helmet and is looking right at you. 

“Are you okay?” 

You shake your head, “No.”

“We can be done.” He answers flatly and you feel yourself getting a little disappointed. Maybe at yourself for giving up so quickly or maybe something else.

“Uhm. We don’t have to be.”

The blond turns back to look at you, “yeah?”

“Yeah. I just… I’ve never done anything like this before.”

He laughs, “I can tell.” His eyes trail down your body before coming back up to your eyes. He doesn’t seem to care that you’ve noticed. “I’m not going to hurt you, ya know?”

“Promise?” you whisper. It felt like a prayer.

He laughs again, his dimples in his cheeks poking through. “Yeah. Promise, pretty girl.”

You nod, suddenly calm, despite the heart attack you’re feeling at the sudden attention.

He runs a hand through his hair as he moves to stand closer to you, making it stick up in all different directions. 

“You can lift your arms,” he says, his hand brushing against my forearm and guiding my arms to extend above my head, “If you want. Or you can keep them straight against your side. I’m just gonna go for a few more minutes.”

“Mhmm” you hum, nodding.

“Yeah? You’re good?” 

“I’m good.” you confirm and watch as he smiles back at you. He gently brushes a strand of hair back from your face, tucking it behind your ear before speaking gently, “Okay, princess. Keep your arms up nice and pretty for me, yeah?”

He pulls on his helmet again and climbs back onto his bike. You straighten up, a sudden rush of determination to get through this. Or to at least keep his attention on you.  There is a clear countdown this time before he starts off, going in circles around you. He starts to pick up speed, flying around, but his eyes lock on you in the middle. One of his arms stretches out to your waist, his palm gently brushing against you as he drives. You can’t help but smile now, heart all but lurching out of your chest. When he pulls back, you quickly lock your arms back at your side. Just like he promised, you’re only in there for a little bit more as he does his last trick. He moves from being parallel to you, to riding up and around the globe, flipping upside down for a second before repeating it on the other side of you. He does this a few more times as the crowd cheers him on. 

When he finishes, he slows to a stop and gestures to you. You awkwardly wave back to the crowd as they cheer even louder. 

You can see Sarah waiting at the entrance to the dome, practically jumping up and down as she screams. You laugh fondly and move to exit. A hand hovers on your back as you step out, landing on the mat with a thud. “That was awesome! You’re insane!” Sarah yells. The biker climbs out behind you, pulling his helmet off and handing it to his team.  “See, told ‘ya I wouldn’t hurt you.” He winks and you practically melt. He extends his hand for you to shake, “JJ,” he says softly. You smile back and take his hand.

[maryelmodest]

I'm going to write something down anyway, because I really want to do it and share it...

✨️✨️✨️I was literally saved by Metalocalypse, and in particular, ironically, by William Murderface!✨️✨️✨️

There will be a very long stream of thoughts here...if you read this to the end, I will be glad, because it is incredibly important for me to share such intimate feelings...

● Back in 2018, I had no idea that this show would have such an impact on my personality and self-expression, I was just a little bored in the summer, and I decided to watch this show...And that moment has come...

● And... I just got fucking carried away, it's perfect-comedy, high-quality metal music, and of course-damn interesting characters who have a written story-it's the perfect combination of everything that I liked in the fictional stories, what I wasn't looking for, but what I needed!

● It was from that very moment...I just lost my mind...maybe it wasn't noticeable to others, but for me personally, internally, yes, I changed my mind-that's when I started an Instagram page, I shared drawings, and oh my God, I even started communicating with people of interest (before, I wouldn't have had the heart to even write to someone first or leave a comment lol), now I know a lot of artists in the fandom, and a lot of people know me, and even fan for me, lol (if the young me had known where I was going because of some cartoon about stupid metalheads (lovingly💖💖💖))

● But, one character stood out especially vividly for me, like a star in a dark sky, like the sun among dark clouds, like a guardian angel, like a prince, like a knight in shining armor, he came into my life-William Murderface❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥✨️✨️✨️

● Maybe at this point someone will call me crazy, but somehow I don't give a fuck now, at first, by the way, accepting the fact that I was in love with him had very big problems, and even selfshipping...

● But, somehow miraculously, I didn't even notice at what specific moment I began to draw a lot not only of him, but also, oh my God, of myself with him!

● He's still my main muse all day long hahahaha!🥰🥰🥰💖💖💖💝💝💝

● Well, you all know perfectly well that I am very madly in love with him, and literally from every social network where there is my profile, I shout about it, but I will tell you something else now...

● The fact is that Willy gave me a very important piece of character that is incredibly important in life-to be brave, to be assertive when necessary, to stand up for yourself, not to be afraid to express your emotions (although I'm still working on it, but now I'm doing better with it), express myself (I literally wore only black all through school and didn't even decorate myself in any other way lol) and my creativity as often as possible, he also taught me to relax when necessary, as well as to look at some things easier (I'm also still working on it, but it became much easier for me to do it by thinking about him), and most importantly-don't give a shit what others think about me or my actions, even though Willy has self-esteem problems himself, but I always damn like it when, despite everything, he doing some shit anyway, because he wanted it hahaha!

● I... it's just that I was so damn closeted mentally before when I was a kid...and I didn't even see that as a problem...and now I look back, and I realize that it's really sad...I just felt that my soul was asking for something completely different, and I didn't understand what exactly...

● It was Willy who kept giving me that feeling of security and confidence that I've been missing in my life...it is at times when I have no strength left-I still know that he is next to me, and therefore everything will be fine with me, no matter what! :3

● Even if I am completely abandoned or abandoned by others...He'll always be with me, I'm sure of it...because I would have done the same for him...

● I would give him all my love, teach him to love himself no matter what, not to give up, to see the beauty in himself and in this world...💗💗💗💖💖💖💝💝💝❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥🎀🎀🎀

● It seems to me that this is exactly the dynamic of my selfship, we will open up like a rosebud next to each other! :3🌹🌹🌹

● In general, he is very important to me...For me, he's not just a character anymore...

● Thank you, my sweet little tiger cub, I love you very much and I will always love you...Even though it really fucking hurts when I miss you...Even though you'll never know how I feel, because you're not real...

● I will remain devoted to you anyway...because that's exactly what's right...the most right and correct decision in my life...✨️✨️✨️💘💘💘

[broareweabouttoviberightnow]

Guys I LIED it is so incredibly late right now but I actually needed to write this right now or it was going to kill me!!! anywhosies shitty lil sad stevepop fic under the cut >:D

The seal ain’t been broken yet. Creased ‘n torn lightly at the edges ‘n liftin’ at the corners. But not broken. It’s been sittin’ quietly in Steve’s back pocket, ‘n under his pillow, ‘n the inside of his vest beside his heart for three days. The letterin’ on the front is messy ‘n jagged like the writer was in a hurry. ‘N he was. Steve knew. He never did anythin’ slow or quiet. He was fast. Too fast to hold onto.

It’s a draggin’ day in August. A Thursday that aches deep in Steve’s chest like Darry’s knees when it’s bound to rain. He can feel somethin’ comin’. ‘N he knows he’s not ready for it. But that won’t stop it from comin’ anyway.

He sighs, leans back against the counter of the same gas station he’s been workin’ at since he was fourteen. Some days it's hard to remember it's been nearly a decade. Time slips by. ‘N one day you turn around ‘n you’re not sixteen goin’ on seventeen. ‘N you haven’t been for a long time.

The letter is worn down, grey at the edges where Steve has run his fingers around ‘n around. He slides a nail under the flap ‘n doesn’t make one more move to open it. It’s a familiar routine he’s been steppin’ the footsteps of since Darry had put it in his hands.

There’s a storm blowin’ in. The trees lean dangerously far ‘n the wind hisses ‘n whistles. No one else would bother comin’ in tonight. It would be a lonely closer. ‘N he’d go home to a lonely apartment. It followed him. It was company.

He lifts the letter to his face. ‘N Steve swears he can still smell him on it. Horses ‘n gasoline ‘n somethin’ sickly sweet he never could pin down. He puts his mouth in the place Soda’s had once been ‘n tears the seal with his teeth. 

Hey Stevie,

It takes more effort than it should to not fold the damn thing right back up ‘n put it back in its damn worn-out envelope. But he’s done it now.

I don’t know how to go about startin’ this. Y’know, I feel a bit silly. Pony was always the writer. I’m not sure where I’m meant to start.

Anywhere. Start anywhere. Say anythin’. Say what I need you to.

I guess I better tell you what I’ve been up to. You know, you’re a hard man to get a hold of, Steve. Last two times I called Dar said you weren’t around. D’you remember when we were younger? God we were always But the signals real bad out here anyway. So I figured I’d write you. I hear you got a new apartment. I bet it’s real swell. Shit. It’s gotta be better than what I got out here. 

A train whistle moans ‘n some shiny silver wrapper tumbles across the parkin’ lot ‘n pins itself to the door. Steve can see the skeleton of his beater in the back corner as it shudders against the gail. He still had cigarette ends ‘n soda pop tops from their junior year tucked under the ashtray. A match of Dallas’. A quarter he owed Johnny. 

He thinks of the drive back across town to his apartment. Filled only with ghosts. Real swell.

I don’t got a room out here right now, but that’s just fine. I sleep out with the horses ‘n I’ll tell ya it’s quieter than the house used to be. What with the way Pony used to get up to all kinds a sleep talkin’ ‘n all of us comin’ ‘n goin’ at all hours. I can’t decide if I like it or not. I don’t sleep real well.

God. Ponyboy. He’d be graduatin’ college this year. Out in the fall. It was funny sometimes. He’d come home to visit ‘n they’d be knee to knee on the back porch steps sneakin’ a cig (Darry claimed the only good thing to come out of all the boys clearin’ out was his home didn’t smell like an ashtray anymore. Steve was obliged to let him tell himself whatever he needed). ‘N sometimes, when the sun hit the hollow lines of his face just right he was fourteen again ‘n hatin’ Steve only as much as Steve hated him. But then he’d blink ‘n they were both a long time from the fall of nineteen sixty-five. 

The people out here are real good. Lotta dead heads ‘n hippies. Always goin’ on about the state of the world. I think Dally woulda hated ‘em. Pony probably digs ‘em. But he was always better at gettin’ the shit I didn’t understand. 

The same folks who had bashed in Steve’s head when they were kids ran around high as kites singin’ about peace ‘n fuckin’ love. Steve couldn’t go for the goddamn hippies. But there was no such thing as a greaser anymore. ‘N it was tuff to slum it. God, Pony’d have somethin’ real smart to say about it.

Anyways. We’re out in El Paso right now. I climbed up the roof last night ‘n I swore I could see Juarez from here. The boy who rides the barrel races said that was stupid. Juarez was still miles ‘n miles away. I suppose he’s right, but he ain’t kind.

Darry always said you don’t gotta like who you work with, you just gotta do the job. Though, don’t tell him that. I bet he’d latch right onto it ‘n insist it was reason enough I come right home. Really. Don’t tell him. ‘Cause I really might just listen.

Steve squeezes his eyes shut. He can see himself peelin’ down the street chasin’ the storm, takin’ the front steps to the Curtis home in one leap, openin’ the door Darry still leaves unlocked. He can see himself slammin’ the letter down ‘n watchin’ as Darry picks the phone up ‘n calls him home. 

‘N then he opens his eyes ‘n knows he never will. 

But I can’t complain. I’m pretty well fed (better than the horses) ‘n mostly well paid (certainly better than the horses). I ride in a couple hours. I always get nervous beforehand. I wish you were here.

Steve crumples the paper. Grips it tight ‘n flinches at the sound the door makes as it slams open. No one’s there but the wind. ‘N the shadows of two boys peelin’ in from a rodeo. Or horsin’ around after a long day in September. Or sittin’ in the kind of companionable silence you could only get by knowin’ someone better than you knew yourself.  

Once we finish this circuit, I’ll be home—for a while, at least. I miss you, I miss everythin’.  I’m sorry. For all of it.

‘N he knows. He knows he is. ‘N it doesn’t make a goddamn difference. ‘N Steve’s never been religious but if God was real he was a cruel bastard. To make you be able to hate the thing you loved. And for what? Gettin�� the chance you didn’t. ‘N it makes him sick to his stomach. But Steve’s never been good at changin’. 

I’ll see you soon, Stevie. I got so much to tell you. I lo-

Yours, Sodapop :)

Steve tears the letter straight in half. ‘N then he sinks to the floor ‘n sobs like he hasn’t in many years. ‘N probably won’t again.

just got an absolutely despicable idea for a Stevepop fic I need u guys to know I am making this exact face

[birdmans]

SUCCESSION (2018–2023)

[icewindandboringhorror]

........creachure

[seventh-district]

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