#this has been a learning curve for me and im already thinking how we can refine & make this more effective for next time
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so far we've raised a collective âŹ768/$823USD~ with our raffle drive!!! there are still ten days left, help us reach 1k đ«¶
#thank you all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#this has been a learning curve for me and im already thinking how we can refine & make this more effective for next time#but i'm very proud so far of how much we've been able to raise together đ
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You've encountered site changes over time as a fan elder, what do you make of Tumblr potentially being put out to pasture? Tumblr was my coming of age fan site, and im looking for advice to transition to the next thing with grace and less bitterness than I feel now.
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Ahaha. God, you should have heard the howling about LJ. "Fandom is over!" "Never again shall we dwell in fandom's True Home!" etc.
Hell, this endless "only LJ was good" crap turns up in replies here on posts where I as OP have very clearly laid out why that's rose colored glasses nonsense and you can so make friends on tumblr, have a conversation on tumblr, etc.
I had my crabby phase about this during the transition from Yahoo Groups to LJ. A lot of the real olds had it over paper zines and the transition to the internet.
I don't know if reading these hilariously samey old posts would help. It does give perspective, I think.
--
As for what you should do, do what I did with Tumblr:
1.
Look around to identify the Next Thing fandom is going to camp out on.
It may take a few guesses and some time to figure this out. You will likely not be an early adopter. Fandom was well established here by the time I joined at the end of 2010. Of course, by now, all those 2009 and before accounts are long gone, but at the time, I was a n00b joining other people's space despite having been in fandom for ages.
2.
Don't expect to enjoy it
I didn't join tumblr because I liked it. In fact, I despised it. I kept right on despising it until a brief stint in Sherlock fandom, a fandom that was so active here at the time that I was able to finally see the good aspects of the site's structure and features.
This is the mistake a lot of people make. They give things a cursory try, don't enjoy them, and go "not for me", forgetting that the last site also had a steep learning curve that was either difficult or that they didn't notice because they were in a different phase of their life.
Bitterness and grief are, frankly, an inherent part of the process. You can try not to be a debbie downer in your public comments, but you can't just not feel those things during the awkward part of the transition. Sometimes, acting positive and cutting off excessively negative thoughts can make you feel less negative overall, but it doesn't happen immediately.
3.
Accept that feeling cranky and old is both a you problem and a state of mind, not a property of the new site
Relatedly, the way we remember fandom platform X feeling usually has more to do with us being in college with fandom friends down the hall or having discovered Our People for the first time or some other time when we had a lot of energy and positive emotions. Often, we were in the throes of a first or new fandom love too, probably for some megafandom that other people also cared about at the same time.
When fandom is leaving some site, there's a grieving process anyway, but we're also often in a worse part of our lives for starting new things. We're busy. We're tired. We're between fandoms. We feel like we already paid our dues to build up our community. Why should we have to start again?
But let me tell you, you always need to start again eventually. I go to a weekly vidders' zoom chat, and a lot of the people in there are old as balls, including Kandy, the person who invented vidding back in the 70s. She's a lot of decades and a few cancers in, and she had to relearn how to vid on a computer after transitioning from slideshows to VCR vidding back in the day. If bad health, platform changes, and dead friends were going to stop her, she'd be long gone.
It's like sharks: you stop swimming, you die.
This isn't just about fandom, obviously. It's about avoiding a midlife crisis and, later, about avoiding feeling emotionally geriatric even when your body is falling apart.
Change gets us all, but being mentally old is a choice. The real reason I gave tumblr such a try was that I had been so resistant to getting on LJ. I was 20. Even a year later, it was fucking embarrassing to have been a crotchety old hag as a college student. I promised myself I'd soldier through the next change instead of dragging my feet about it. And it totally worked in the end! But boy did it not make the transition any less unpleasant emotionally!
4.
Find your joy
As is obvious from the above, the vast majority of the problem is just emotions. Fandom has been on a million broken sites with shitty features. We go where the people are, regardless of whether it has the technological aspects we liked at the last place. The actual shape of that platform is largely irrelevant.
What does matter is whether we as an individual fan are still excited and happy about something. I was between fandoms recently and went looking around for BL series I hadn't watched yet. People kept suggesting things set in the present day with too-cheesy production values and too many banal schoolboys in modern day settings without even anything spicy going on. I realized that the BL/danmei scene wasn't really cutting it for me and I should go for production values and genre and non-canon ships. You probably scrolled annoyedly past the picspams that resulted.
(Of course, hilariously, someone has now shown me the trailer of Red Peafowl, so someone may be making BL that feels like it's for me after all. Look at all that badwrong and very dark color grading.)
When you're in a good place emotionally, it's a hell of a lot easier to weather any change, and when you have a new fandom, it's a lot easier to connect with other fans.
A lot of people wait around for lightning to strike twice. They found their first fandom by accident, and they expect it to happen seamlessly again. For me, it's far more productive to brute force it: collect up a big list of what's popular or what's new and go through it till you find things you might like, then try them all.
And part of this, obviously, is not waiting for other fans to make the party happen. The more you need to join something other people are already doing, the less choice you'll have in fandoms or in platforms. If you aren't picky and just go where the tropey longfic is, that can work, but even then, favorite authors disappear or go to fandoms you hate and former megafandoms dry up. If you're the one bringing the party, it's a lot easier to find a new fandom or platform or community to have fun in.
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first of all, i must say thank you for your discourse here about williams and alex and also logan, bcs i didn't see that a lot on other platforms.
i agree with most of your points, especially in how alex's career in williams after carlos join the team. i think it's gonna be a test too for alex, and to prove that he's indeed a good driver. okay, we know he has the potential, but we don't really know how far he can go. williams in 2023 is quite good, no? i mean, at least he finished in p7 which is good compared to this season.
i watched a youtube video, talking about what williams want to achieve, like james vowles's idealism (sorry), that's why he treats carlos like that (if you know what he has been said about carlos this summer break), but still, it's not nice to do that, when logan is still on the team. i think they also place money on adrian newey to come, but they aren't as rich as aston martin so that plan is off. sad to say but I'm kinda excited to see them in 2025, although im tired of their tractor đ
thank you and sorry for yapping in your page đ
Hi hello! I've been so invested in the other events that have happened and completely forgot about this.
Yes! I think this is going to be a great test of his skill next year, especially with the potential upgrades Williams might bring. We saw recently that Alex was disqualified because his floor was illegal, but he did incredible otherwise. As with Carlos, he's a great "midfield" driver to compare Alex to. We've seen him in comparison to Max, where Max was obviously the number one driver and Red Bull's priority, and he did not perform up the standards set for him.
We've also seen Alex in comparison to Logan, who was picked up from F2 a bit early (In the general public's opinion). In addition, at Williams Alex was clearly the number one driver, I mean they gave Alex Logan's car for Australia. Then, Logan was given Alex's REPAIRED car, and it took them basically a season and a half to have the same upgrades at the same time. In summary, we see a prioritized Alex and a pushed to the side Logan.
basically, two extremes in the field, and even when Latifi was at Williams that was also an extreme, on the same end as Logan (Though there are different circumstances as Latifi's was a skill issue and Logan's was a support issue), meaning the results have been skewed due to outliers. His actual stats are affected the most by his teammate, as with any driver, so we don't have a true rating of his skill level.
And I think that yes, the 2023 car was a good car, but I also think it's due to the fact that Alex has had longer at Williams and can get a general sense of how the car is, and therefore he was more prepared to race, while 2023 was Logan's first season and therefore a learning curve. Not to mention, there's already a learning curve when you're driving a bloody Williams.
I've stayed away from Williams for my own mental health (I get unreasonably angry when I see J*mes V*wles's face, he looks like a Who from Whoville) and therefore haven't seen what he's said. But I'm going to say this every time, the way they handled the news and even more present news was a mess. it was disgraceful, utterly idiotic, and disgusting. Posting an announcement about your incoming driver, and multiple at that, before thanking your outgoing driver? Messy with a Capital M.
Also, don't apologize for yapping! I'm here for it! Literally my favorite thing to do is to talk to y'all!
#f1#formula 1#logan sargeant#williams racing#james vowels when i catch you#alex albon#writing#carlos sainz#max verstappen#red bull racing#dozyisdead
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you study abroad right? how has that been? i want to but im worried its going to be too hard to adjust to plus school
i do!! iâll give pros n cons though they might be specific
pros:
- iâm confident that iâm getting some of the best education i could be, which even though iâm from new york where there r many college options i still feel that it wouldâve been settling to stay at home. to me itâs worth being there for the school
- i do like having the opportunity to immerse myself in another language as someone interested in linguistics!
- for italy specifically, food, art, architecture, pre-capitalist city planning which i feel is moreâŠ.human-centric?
- since my school is in english, i have meet ppl from allll around the world. my class was originally 16 ppl and we were from 10 different countries across 5 continents. of the friends iâve made there, one is chinese from hungary, one is from portugal, one is from india, one is from zimbabwe, and two are other usamericans.
- the cost isnât great since itâs a private school, but iâm still paying less than i could have been in the US, n godwilling i will not graduate w student debt
- europe has trains so i can go places so easily
- night-out bar and club culture that i wouldnât have access to yet in the US w/out a fake, but which i feel is crucial to the college experience lol. will treasure memories dancing to live music at the cuban bar, drinking spritzes on the river, bringing bottles of prosecco to house parties
cons:
- paperwork is so annoying ESPECIALLY because italian bureaucracy is ill-managed. BUT americans have such a passport privelege, my old roommate from iran couldnt come to school for months bc of her visa
- apts are still expensive i general, especially in places like florence w a high tourist appeal bc they are also airbnb infected, which has totally jacked up rent rates. right now iâm blessedly paying what i would definitely call reduced rent because a rich friend of a friend of a friend had an old apartment that sheâs renting to me for far less than market price. but without knowing people from the area already apt hunting is hell.
- itâs not entirely a con, but def a learning curve around communication, because european profs are often excitable or brusque or sometimes even cruel in my experience in a way that wouldnât fly so much in american colleges (though part of that is the fashion element imo.) it was hard for many americans to adapt to this sort of criticism
- i am definitely more conscious of my blackness in italy, ppl are more ignorant about black people (though imo not actually more hateful.) but ppl are also so amazed by my hair which is nice sometimes lolâŠ..american whites will like never compliment black hair cos theyre scared. but yeah white ppl in europe dont have much of a faux pas developed against certain racism yet
- i do miss my family when iâm thereâ though now i miss my friends when iâm not there! and the time zone diff >_<
- it is very easy to be lonely, esp. at first. at fashion school iâm not really around âmy typeâ of people, which means i feel really isolated even around the other americans. they just donât know how to make heads or tails of me i suppose. but then, if i really think of it, that might just be a con of being weird in general. my usual odds of finding someone i really gel with are about 1/500, so that puny statistic decreases even further when most ppl around me donât speak english as a first language.
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ĐŃĐșŃĐŽĐ°- where from, from where.
ĐŃĐșŃĐŽĐ° ŃŃĐŸŃ ŃĐ”Đ»ĐŸĐČĐ”Đș? - where is this person from?
ĐĐ· (iz, is) - is from.
Я Оз - i am from,
ĐĐŸŃ ĐŒĐ°ĐŒĐ° Оз ĐșĐ°ĐœĐ°ĐŽŃ - my mom is from canada.
The peculiarity of using âisâ instead of from. Changes things. And is also fun getting into the mind of a russian by simply pronouncing a few words. One feels the change in mind.
The one wouldnât technically disagree with the statement of âmy mother is the land.â From mother earth or motherland. Though i suspects this notion would ho by unnoticed by native russian speakers simply because that connection isnt drawn even though motherland and fatherland are apart of their everyday language.
One doesnât hear that of Americans or Canadians at all. For all the disrespect people, give to their home. Littering and what not. Detaching from natural associations into somethign else. Beacsue ânature sucksâ.
Aside form that. They have no word for The. But they do have one(s) for this and that. Lol fucken love it.
Finnaly eatched I am dragon. Its good. Would have enjoyed it more a couple years ago.
On towards, the subject of my recents talks have been, to better phrase. The archetypes of the collective unconscious. Or of the cultural unconscious. Or better stated yet, the archetype and the letter. A dramatic switching of languages or of alphabets seems to result in this. One can nearly, immediately feel the difference in consciousness. Simply by uttering a few words of a foreign language. Though how foreign russian is compared to english in diminishing in scale the more i learn. They are not so different. My learnings have been bringing me closernin the confirmation that thereâs the power of magic within the very fabric of speech probably less so in the power of the written word for it adds so much more depth.
I have been looking for sources on this subject but they are all but non-existent to me. Save for a recent finding of an author whi has spent her time scientifically analyzing words. With a book tittles the gods of the word and a phonemic type dictionary. Which has my curiosity. Perhaps. A purchases are to be ordered. It fallows my chain in that every letter of a word has its own power. And that my current tarot layout system is a blending of languages already. For they seem to match that of the russian. Before i started a venturing into that subject.
They tried lassoing this mars/ moon aspect i have between the physical and the âspiritualâ-conscientualâ by bringing past manipulative bs in connections with my mother and the raping of my sex today into the self-destructive/ self estrangement. But fuck that. And fuck you. There nothing positive there. Mt decision has been made. Theres no changing that. Its done. Theres no going back. So fuck off. I have no love or compassion for that woman.
Theres a reason for the habitual things we do everyday without concession. The washing of the dishes. The brushing of the teeth. The fallowing traffic rulesâ the same things at the same. Time everyday. It weakens the bond of the chaotic rule. By self governing in place of allowing the outer to govern for us. To an extent that is. The belief in god is the same as the chaotic except for that theres a consistency in framing the mind which is synonymous with daily chores. It works as the same. As it does with the governing rule of political affairs for the lesser bodies of society. Whoch are the everyday person. The russians say it better with the everyday Đ§Đ”Đ»ĐŸĐČĐ”Đș.
The number 4 looking letter Ч. Is not such a far off shoot from card number 4, being by tarot and qwerty as the empress and the emperor. And we have a merging of the natural state and the rulling state. If one doesnât solely associate these to mother and father. And i rather like letter Đ (L) for it is the shape of the tongue in the motion of the letters prononciation. L is a rather curved letter compared to the sharp of the latin L.
Well dont think im going to work. No sleep. Slept poorây yesterday. The day they stop fucken with meâŠ. Another year gone. Will be the fay i may develop naturally. But. As a side teack of what would be. I wonder what not feeling defense feels likesâŠ.. uhm. Will never know. Always on the receiving end. Though âgâjobâ on bringin in the small minded narcissist teacher. To say its a personal vendetta. Based off a fucken high school prank. Which was actually pretty funny. Whole classes laughed. Was outnof character. But you know. People need to lose their entires laugh for doing a single thing out of character. Just how the worlds spins. Hypocritical since. Shems a prankster herself. Thought it was funny to stage a fake exam to waych all her student squirm over. And congratulations. Now i hate my little sister too. Guess there wont be a generational gap that connects me back to family. Oh well. Tough loss that is. âŠwish i was a narcissist maybe i could be like my fatherâŠ. On second thought. Nope. I take join out of fucken with other people. My bad.
My spyche may be inside out now. But she loves me. Right, spyche? Yes, i do. That a girl.
Worst part about it is that i helped in saving more lives today in preventing accidents and hardship. As is ussualy the case emmidiatly proveeding my acts by other people. And the fact that i got shot in the head with a nailgun. Doesnt help your guys cause much. Harmless but it could have not been. Couldâda.
Oh my goddess, tmblr isnt queer today.
Fun, fallowing the numbers of notes on all this pics. They fallow the same. Blaze! Fo sho. .. lost my script. What was i gonna say?⊠i forget. Was thinking about cherry and russian santaâs daughter. And devil cards, and numberings and letterings. And, oh yeah. My ass is still a little sick but, seems at thr moment to be on the mends. Grateful for that in its own way. Looking at the silver lining. And personal motivation.
But its getting late. Im not sure about driving forklifts and using power tools in a few hours time. Considering this is the second night of poor sleep.
Though tmblr is still overly trashy.
Have t had coffee in awhiel. Hipefully she dismt put speed in it this time.
Themes of new film releases are. The cold and evil ballerinas. You got ghostbusters. And you got godzilla. Both involve defeating the cold using intense heat. Considering its gonna be plus 25 today and its not even june yet. Summer is gonna suck. Maybe theres a town in northern Ontario that needs a new denizen.
Well, ill try to enjoy the day today.
Ok work on the cards today, and make a new post. Maybe go get some weed to help with images. Its been awhile.
Other than that still havent found any meaning to the robin. Other than retreat. And even that isnât a strong notion maybe they dint mean anything.
A robin, a redwing, a dove, a croh, and a bluejay in that order. The red wing the least significant. Which seems to work as a sign of respect and acceptance. Wait for one to move. While perched on your path. The most significant was the robin and the bluejay. But whatever.
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Always You | JJK (Eight-Part 1)
Summary: you and Jungkook have been best friends since freshmen year of college, thereâs a lot of unsaid feelings and tension but neither make a move. what happens when his friend Taehyung (also your crush) needs a fake girlfriend?
Pairing: Jungkook x Female reader
Genre: friends to lovers, idiots to lovers, slight slow burn, roommate au, college au, SMUT (starting ch2), fluff, angst (in later chapters) slight crack, lots of drama
Word Count: 11.5k (part 1)
Warnings: Swearing, alcohol consumption, sexual tension (!!!), mentions of sex, oc struggles with her future, mentions of vibrator, mentions of cum eating, dirty talk, vaginal fingering, oral (female receiving), masturbation, swallowing
Notes: I am having to post this chapter in two parts, I am so sorry about that! But here it is!! Hope you guys enjoy this chapter:) feel free to send an ask if you want to be added to the taglist or just want to chat about the story:) I LOVE talking with yaâll!
Taglist: @mooniyooni @thisartemisnevermisses @giadalin @kookiebunny097 @cosmosjk @moonchild1 @just-jeon @anpanman-sonyeondan @starlight-night0 @yessii-i @apollukee @mikasaredscarf1 @kaye-rosales @bunnyjeonjk @dyriddle @aclowe13 @bishuthot @271101 @seagulljk @hass-mich-los @peachy-skz0325 @wonusbitch @not-your-lion @flowersgirl02 @justinetingball @fiantomartell @fairysunooo @taebae19
© taestefully-in-luv
Previous ---- Next
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
September
âWhat about this one?â You hold up another birthday banner, showing Vanessa yet another option.
âUgly.â She says.
This is the fourth fucking birthday banner youâve shown her and she doesnât approve of any of them. But you have to admit this one is a little ugly.
âVanessaâŠâ you groan out, getting very obviously frustrated.
âI like this one.â She points to a banner. The very first one you showed her.
âSeriously?â you grab the banner and place it in your cart. âOkay, we still have to pick up the cake at 3. And we need to make sure we have enough plates for everyoneâŠoh! We also still have to pick up the bottles at the liquor store.â
âI can get the cake.â She replies smoothly.
âWe can just go together?â
Today is Jungkookâs birthday and you and Vanessa have been (Kind of) texting throughout the last week trying to find a good day to meet up. The day happened to be today of all days, so youâre feeling quite rushed.
âFine.â Vanessa picks at her cuticles, just standing here looking gorgeous.
You on the other handâŠwere not expecting this to be a fashion show! Youâre in shorts and a t shirt while she wears a flowy green dress and sandals.
âI want to be the one to present his cake to him though,â Vanessa begins, her eyes never leaving her fingers, âI am his girlfriend after all.â
You hate that your chest tightens at her words, you hate how her words affect you like this, how she affects you like this. Just being in her presence alone makes your heart twist.
âGot it.â You place some birthday plates in the cart, âSoâŠwhat did you get him for his birthday?â you try to make conversation.
âA cologne.â
âYou know heâs sensitive to smellsââ
âHe likes this one.â
âOh.â
âI know him better than you think y/n.â her smooth voice cuts you like a butcher knife.
You nod your head, not knowing what to say. Maybe she does. But like, you still know him better right? You got to, right?
âWhat about you?â Vanessa lifts her eyes to meet yours, her eyes are small and dark and inviting.
âUh, to be honestâŠIâm meeting with Jimin after this so we can go shopping for his gifts. So, I donât know yet but I have an idea.â
âAnd whatâs your idea?â her eyes go back down to her nails that she keeps picking at.
âFriendship bracelets.â You state.
âHm.â Vanessa pushes the cart forward and walks towards the isle with candles. âWe still need nice candles for the cake.â
âRight.â
~~~~~~~
âIt couldnât have been that bad, babe.â Jimin holds up a plain black hoodie and nods approvingly. âAnother one for his collection, what do you think?â
âLooks like something Iâd steal, so yes.â You give him a quick thumbs up, âAnd it was bad dude. Sheâs so hard to talk to!â
âYeah, I could see that.â Jimin stands in front of a full body length mirror and checks himself out, pushing his hair out of his face. âForehead or no forehead, tonight?â
âHmm, no forehead.â
âForehead it is.â
âWow, you never listen to me!â
Jimin chuckles wholeheartedly, shrugging his shoulders like he agrees with you.
âSo, where are these bracelets you keep going on about?â
âThat one weird shop buy the smoothie place has these cute bracelets with letters for names on them! I was thinking I could get him a black one with my initial on it and I would get myself one with his initial.â
âYou guys are soâŠthatâs cute I guess.â Jimin giggles, he holds up his wrist as if imagining himself with the bracelet. âI want one too!â he whines.
âMaybe for your birthday.â You wink. âAnyway, do you think Vanessa knows Jungkook better than me?â
Jimin stops walking to get a look at you, an expressions that reads: Are you serious? Plastered on his face.
âItâs a valid question.â You say.
âNo one knows Jungkook like you honey.â
âOkayâŠAlso, youâll be meeting my friend Yoongi tonight!â
âThe not date, date guy?â Jimin pouts, âI thought you werenât going to lead him onâŠâ
You scrunch up your face in confusion,
âI can have friends Jimin, Iâm not leading him on!â you try to defend.
âIf you say so. Just like, try to focus on one boy at a time, you know?â Jimin teases.
You two walk to the shop that sells the bracelets and go inside. You find the bracelets youâre looking for rather quickly, feeling nice and lucky. You grab them and go to pay, when you finish up at the register you notice a Jack Skellington key chain and add it on to Jungkookâs gifts. You always have trouble finding good gifts for people, okay? You take what you can get.
âShit, itâs already 6. I still need to go home and get ready!â
~~~~~
Nick lets you and Vanessa use their place as the spot to celebrate, itâs bigger than your place and Vanessa agrees saying itâs bigger than hers as well. Nick and his bro that believes in aliens (You really got to learn his name but at this point you are too afraid to ask) are the only ones here as you and Vanessa set up.
âBro AI is out to get us manââ Aaanndd you are tuning him out, you watch as Nick listens closely, nodding his head every few minutes and whispering âBroâ. You and Vanessa hang up decorations in silence, the sound of Nick and his bro chatting away filling the room.
âPeople should start arriving soonâŠâ you try to make small talk with Vanessa, she only hums in response not even sparing you a glance.
âYou look nice.â You try giving her a compliment, she turns her head to the side to look at you and a sly smile grows on her face.
âDo you have feelings for Jungkook?â
You immediately choke on your fucking spit, what the actual fuck? You try to compose yourself when you hear the front door opening. Thank God.
âIt is I!â You know that voice. âWhere is my Jungkookie?â You hear Jin entering the living room along with Namjoon and Hobi.
âJimin should be bringing him in the next 30 or so minutes!â you yell out. Once Jin and the other two boys spot you they light up.
ây/n!!!â Jin hurries to your side and bring you in for a quick hug. âHow are you?!â
âGood, good.â You laugh, hugging him back.
âGood to see you y/nâ Namjoon says with a soft smile and then you hear your named being shouted even though Hobi is a foot away from you.
âLong time no see!!!â He hugs you, shaking you around in his embrace. You canât help but chuckle at your friend.
âHi guys, Iâm so glad you could make it.â
âWould we miss our Jungkookieâs birthday? No way.â Jin says.
âOh,â you turn around to see Vanessa just standing behind you, not saying anything just staring. âThis is Vanessa. Jungkookâsââ
âWe know!â Hobi says, âJungkook has brought her to Jinâs. Nice to see you again Vanessa!â
Vanessa tilts her head and nods, her lips not even attempting to curve into a smile.
âYou too.â She finally says.
This girl either has no manners or just does not know how to properly socialize? Maybe she gets anxiety being around too many people?
You feel your phone buzz.
Yoongs 7:14pm
Im outside
âBe right back guys, a friend of mine just got here.â You try talking over your group of friends. You head towards the front door, swinging it open to a Min Yoongi waiting patiently.
He smiles at you when he sees you, he holds up a bottle of wine and shakes it around a bit.
âFor the party.â He says.
âPerfect, letâs pour us a glass right now!â you gesture him to enter the apartment.
You two walk into the kitchen, and you start searching for a wine bottle opener but canât seem to find it.
âHey Nick!â You yell out, hoping to get his attention, âWhereâs the wine opener?â
Nick shuffles into the kitchen and gives you an expression that screams he has no idea.
âI know where itâs at.â Vanessaâs silky voice fills your ears as she enters the kitchen.
âOh.â Of course she does. Why wouldnât Vanessa know? She probably comes here more than you doâŠ
âThanks.â You finally say when she hands you the wine opener.
âWell, letâs open this baby up!â you turn to face Yoongi and he smiles at you.
âHi Vanessa.â Yoongi waves at the girl and she hums in response, walking out of the kitchen.
âSorry, sheâsâŠâ but you donât know what to say. Also, why are you trying to excuse her?
You pour you and Yoongi a glass and gulp it down quickly, you finish your first glass in just seconds.
âI need another one.â
âWhatâs got you so stressed in a time of celebration?â Yoongi casually sips on his wine, one baby sip after the other.
âNothing, nothing.â
ây/nâŠâ his soft tone makes you feel comforted already and he hasnât even said anything yet.
âI donât know how to say it without sounding psychotic.â You admit, pouring yourself your second glass of wine.
âTry me.â
âI feel like I am competingâŠwithâŠâ
âWith Vanessa?â He gladly finishes for you.
âYeah, likeâŠI donât know, I feel like sheâs trying to take my place. But my place isnât âgirlfriendâ so I donât know what Iâm freaking out about.â
Yoongi sets his glass down and studies you for a moment, you begin to feel antsy under his gaze.
âIâm obviously on your side,â Yoongi begins in a hushed voice, âBut maybe sheâs worried too?â
âI wish I knew if she felt worried, or felt like, anything. This girl is hard to crack!â you quietly say.
âJust try to enjoy the night, okay?â Yoongi smiles and you donât even feel like smiling back but you do. Suddenly, you feel your phone going off.
Jungkook 7:32pm
Why is Jimin making me dress up? I thought it was just a couple of us? Why do I need to look nice, Iâm tired from work
Jungkook 7:33pm
Seriously y/nâŠitâs just a couple of us, right?
y/n 7:35pm
omg yes Jungkook itâs nothing big I swear, he just wants you to look nice for pictures
Jungkook 7:36pm
I always look nice for pics lol
y/n 7:38pm
No comment
Jungkook 7:40pm
Donât be fukin rude
` y/n 7:40pm
Can you guys hurry up?
Jungkook 7:44pm
Jimin is in the mirror deciding if heâs showing his forehead or not
y/n 7:45pm
classic Jimin
Jungkook 7:45pm
Classic Jimin
You stuff your phone in your back pocket and grab your glass of wine and begin sipping on it again. Yoongi eyes you up and smirks.
âThat the birthday boy?â
âHm? Oh, sorryâŠyes. He and Jimin should be here soon.â You watch as Yoongi nods his head and then you realizeâŠâOh my god, let me introduce you to the guys!â you set your glass down on the counter and reach for Yoongiâs hand and pull him towards the living room. Unfortunately for you, you miss the way Yoongi blushes at the contact.
âGuys, guys.â You interrupt the boys from their conversations, âThis is my friend YoongiâŠâ you gesture towards the boy, âYoongi, this is JinâŠNamjoon, Hobi, and Nick and his pal, uhâŠâ you blink at Alien Dude and he just grins at you, not realizing you donât know his fucking name. âYeah, anyway.â You decide to move on, âJungkook and Jimin should be here soonââ Suddenly, there is soft knocking on the door. You raise a brow because who else could it be?
You walk towards the front door and look through the peep hole and much to your surprise you see Holly and Trina waiting outside the door. Youâre quick to open it with a wide smile on your face.
âI thought you didnât want to come?â You ask, your question directed towards Trina.
âIâŠâ her eyes slide to Holly, ââŠHad a change of heart.â She huffs out quietly.
âYouâre going to be civil?â you smirk at your friend and she rolls her eyes at you.
âSheâs going to be more than civil.â Holly pipes up, âSheâs going to be nice.â
âHey we never agreed to that!â Trina crosses her arms over her chest, âBut whatever.â
âThanks for coming T.â your smirk transitions into a soft smile. This means a lot to you, that Trina is trying to accept Jungkook.
âWell? Are you going to let us in or what?â
âRight, right.â You move to the side and let the girls through. They step inside and make their way towards the boys.
âOh? You must be Mister Oatmeal Raisin!â Trina grins towards Yoongi, who stands here chatting with Hobi.
âYouâreâŠlet me guess, Trina? And you must be Holly?â he nods at both girls, âIâve heard a lot about you two.â
âI hope good things?â Trina teases.
âOnly the best.â Yoongi raises his glass to her and she turns her head to smirk at you.
You watch as everyone gets along, talking, laughing and having a good timeâall except Vanessa. She is sitting on the sofa on her phone, tapping away. She doesnât even try to converse with any of Jungkookâs friends? Strange. You hate her, technically. But you canât help but feel bad? Like, why does she isolate herself so much? Does she really just have some social anxiety or something? Thereâs got to be a reason for her odd behavior.
âHey.â You say, sitting on the sofa next to her. âYou okay?â
âHm?â Vanessa doesnât look up from her phone as she barely acknowledges you.
âWhy donât you come hang out with the rest of us?â
Vanessa tilts her head to get a look at you and she blinks at you repeatedly.
âWhy?â she finally asks. âIâm only here for Jungkook.â
Okay, ouch.
âOh...wellââ
âYou never answered my question from earlier,â Vanessas coy smile begins growing on her face. âHow you feel about Jungkook.â
You feel your palms get sweaty when you process her words. How the hell do you respond to that?
âIâIâŠâ Then the front door is opening and you hear Jimin obnoxiously announce their arrival, that he has the birthday boy.
You immediately jump to your feet and rush towards the entrance of the apartment to greet your friends.
âToo bad you canât admit it, â Vanessa whispers, her eyes going back to her phone, âI could help you too.â
âJUNGKOOKIE!!!â Jin opens his arms wide, âCome and embrace me! Itâs your birthday gift.â Jungkook stumbles in the apartment with wide eyes as he searches the living room. His eyes find yours and he smiles. He shows you his bunny grin and you canât help but smile back. He looks breathtaking, Jimin didnât play around picking Jungkookâs outfit. Ripped black jeans, chunky boots, a plaid shirt with a leather jacketâhe looks hot as hell. Vanessa is a lucky girl, you think bitterly to yourself.
Jungkook greets his friends one by one until he sees Yoongi walk from the kitchen into the living room. Yoongi has refilled his wine glass and stops just in front of Jungkook and bows his head in greeting. You rush to the two boys, joining them in this awkward encounter.
âOh, I invited Yoongi.â You begin to explain, âYou remember Yoongi, right?â you ask Jungkook.
âOf courseâŠâ Jungkook tries smiling but itâs tense and strained. At this, Yoongi smirks.
Yoongi steps closer to you and wraps an arm around your shoulder and he smiles at Jungkook.
âIâm y/nâs plus one tonightâor I guess herâŠdate?â
âD-Date?â You and Jungkook both stutter out.
Yoongi brings you in closer, nice and snug against his shoulder as he chuckles.
âSomething like that.â
Jungkook tries releasing a breath but finds it to be troublesome. He looks at you with an expression you cannot really decipher, but he doesnât look all too pleased.
âThatâs nice.â He finally says, scratching the back of his neck.
âWhatâs nice?â Itâs a smooth and silky voice. Vanessa. âHappy birthday babe.â She joins your circle next to Jungkook and places a kiss on his cheek.
âRightâŠâ you butt in, âHappy birthday Jungkook.â You smile, still in Yoongiâs arms.
âWhat do you want to do first?â Vanessa links arms with Jungkook and you feel your body go tense. You donât want her to touch him.
âEat.â Jungkook laughs, âIâm so hungry.â
âWell, we have pizza for everyone.â You say loudly, getting the rest of everyoneâs attention.
âYou say pizza? Hell yeah.â Trina walks towards you four with Holly following behind her.
âOh hey TrinaâŠâ Jungkook says, not entirely too sure how to talk to the girl that hates him.
âHey Jungkook,â she says quickly with a smile, âSo whereâs the pizza?â
Jungkook and you share a look of pleasant surprise. Trina? Being nice?
The rest of the boys follow and you all head inside the kitchen to snag a few slices of pizza from the pizzeria that Jungkook is fond of. Vanessa stays close to Jungkookâs side, not that you are surprised. But what is surprising you is that Yoongi has suddenly become slightly more affectionate with you?
Yoongi takes any chance he can get to touch you in some way, whether it be picking a piece of thread off your shirt, or placing a wild strand of hair behind your ear. He doesnât really strike you as the type to be so openly affectionateâŠat least not the one to initiate it.
But can picking a piece of thread off your shirt really be counted as affectionate? Maybe heâs just trying to help. What you donât know thoughâŠJungkook has picked up on too. He has watched as Yoongi smiles at you and you smile back, he has watched as Yoongi subtlety touches your arm when he talks to you and how your hand finds his shoulder when you laugh.
Jungkook sits on his couch, chowing down on a slice of pizza as he glares at you and Yoongi. He doesnât mean to glare but why is he here? This is a small get together between close friends. How close have you and Yoongi gotten?
âAnd then bro, I was like no fucking way bro.â Alien bro talks animatedly, his hands motioning all around the place.
Nick stuffs another slice of pizza in his mouth, nodding along to Alien broâs story.
âThat is fucking wild.â You hear Trina pitch in, âLike, did that really happen to you?â
âIt may have been a dream, but let me tell youâŠâ Alien bro closes his eyes, âI think it was real, like a memory.â
You internally laugh, because this dude has got some wild fucking stories and you donât know how to take him seriously. But everyone seems to be enjoying it.
âLetâs do cake!â You hear Jimin yell out, âI have such a sweet tooth right now.â
At this you see Vanessa actually light up, like she has been waiting all night for someone to mention the cake. You two agreed she could present it to Jungkook, maybe thatâs why sheâs so visibly excited.
âIâll go get itâŠâ She speaks up, âIâll be right back.â She says, facing Jungkook. Vanessa stands from her spot next to Jungkook on the couch and heads towards the kitchen.
A few minutes pass by when you hear your name being called. You get up and walk to the kitchen when you see Vanessa with the cake in her hands, the candles already lit up.
âCan you turn off the lights?â she asks, âAnd you can start the Birthday song.â
You nod your head, walking back into the living room to switch the lights off.
âOkay, ready Jungkook?â you smile at him and he rolls his eyes with a smirk.
âI guess.â He says, amusement laced in his voice.
âHappy birthday to you!â you begin singing, the rest of the gang joins in and the living room is soon being filled with the sound of everyoneâs voices singing Jungkook a happy birthday. You pull out your phone and begin recording, Vanessa walks in with the cake and she keeps her face neutral. She doesnât even sing, wow. You canât help but kind of laugh, thatâs so in character for her.
âHappy birthday dear Juuuungkoook, Happy birthday to you!â You all finish up and start whooping and hollering.
âMake a wish.â Vanessa sets the cake down in front of him and Jungkook nods his head. He takes a deep breath before his eyes find yours. You guys share a brief moment before heâs blowing out his candles.
âWhat did you wish for?!â Hobi asks, excitement filling the room as everyone agrees that they want to know.
âSecret.â He says, still looking at you.
âHere,â Vanessa nudges a perfectly wrapped box in Jungkookâs hands, âPresent.â
âYou didnât have to Vanessa.â Jungkook grins at her but heâs already unwrapping his gift, he throws the wrapping paper to the floor and takes a look at the cologne box.
âThis is so expensive!â he whines, âBut thank you!â He looks at you for a moment when he awkwardly pecks Vanessas lips in front of everyone.
âMy turn!â Jimin shouts, âMy turn, my turn!â he stands up and walks by the front door where he left the gift. He picks up the bag and walks back into the living room, standing in front of Jungkook, handing him the bag.
âYouâll love it.â Jimin wiggles his brows at the boy.
Jungkook wiggles his brows back as he opens up the bag and pulls out a black hoodie.
âFuck yeah.â Jungkook stands up to hug Jimin, âThis one is so soft.â
The rest of the gang gives Jungkook a gift one by one until all eyes are on you. Suddenly, you feel super fucking shy and lame that you got matching bracelets.
âUh, I havenât gotten anything for you yetâŠâ you lie. âBut I will soon, promise.â
Jungkookâs bunny smile begins to fade as he processes your words,
âNo worries, y/n.â he smiles again, âYou donât have to get me anything.â
âItâs just a little late, is all.â You shift awkwardly from one foot to another. You wish you werenât such an idiot. You notice Jimin staring at you from across the room, he looks disappointed.
âWhat about the bracelets y/n?â Vanessaâs voice can be heard by everyone. She looks at you with a blank expression and you never wanted to strangle someone more.
âWhat bracelets?â Jungkookâs curiosity showing.
âItâs nothing.â
âItâs not nothing. Theyâre friendship bracelets. Such a sweet idea.â Vanessa smiles at you.
âYou got me and you friendship bracelets?â Jungkook stands up and walks to you, he extends his right hand out and waits expectantly.
âThanks Vanessa.â You deadpan.
âNo problem.â
âItâs really nothing JungkookâŠâ
âI want the damn bracelet y/n.â
You stare at him for a moment, his big doe eyes making you feel like you must give in.
âokay, theyâre in my bagâŠâ you turn around and search for your purse. You notice Yoongi trying to hand it you and you smile at him gratefully.
âHere.â You hand him his bracelet and he inspects it, rolling it through his fingers.
âYour initial?â Jungkook clenches the bracelet in his fist and looks up at you.
âI fucking love it.â He brings the bracelet to his heart, âI will wear it every day.â
âI have one tooâŠâ you pull it from your bag and dangle in around.
âIt has a J?â Jungkook bunny smile grows ten times as wide. He takes the bracelet from your fingers and chuckles at the two bracelets.
âI love it.â
âIâm glad you like itââ
âNo, love it. I loveâŠâ Then heâs clearing his throat, remembering he is in a room full of people.
âThank you.â
âOh! Thereâs one more thingâŠâ you pull out the key chain and you watch as Jungkookâs face lights up. Of course he is more excited about the key chain, you laugh.
âFucking awesome!â Jungkook takes it from you, âIâll put it on my keys!â
âThatâs the idea,â you chuckle. âAnyway, letâs play games now.â
You and Jungkook stand at the front of the living room, in front of the T.V in battle mode.
âYouâre going down Jeon.â You snicker at him, he only rolls his eyes at you as he readies himself.
âIâm just glad Iâm not going against Jimin.â Jungkook shoots Jimin a look and Jimin winks.
You two have to chug an entire beer can, trying to beat the other.
âHonestly, same.â You admit, if anyone can down a drink in secondsâitâs Jimin.
Trina stands up and joins your side,
âOkay, are we ready everyone?â
Everyone begins cheering, the sound motivating you and making you feel excited.
âOkay. When I yellâŠBAMâŠyou start drinking and donât stop until that can is emptyâŠgot it?â
âYes, we know how to chug a drink, Trina.â
âDamn girl, I was just sayinâ.â Trina throws a hand on her hip, âOkay, 3âŠ2âŠ1âŠBAM!â
You and Jungkook scramble to start drinking, the chilly liquid making its way down your throats. The drink is cold and carbonated and youâre trying to ignore the way it sizzles, instead pretending itâs as smooth as water and you down it back.
âJungkook is going to win!â Namjoon yells out, he has risen to his feet, the excitement too much.
âNo, y/n is! Look how much her head it tilting back!â You hear Jin chime in.
Truth is, you arenât really sure how much youâve drank, or how much is left! Youâre just wanting it to be over!
âHoly shit, theyâre both so close!â
âBrooooooooâ
And right as youâre about to finish your drink you hear the sound of a can being crushed right next to you. He won.
âWHATâS UPâŠLOSER!â Jungkook shakes his empty, crushed can in your face as you finally finish your own drink.
âOkay, okay. Literally only let you win because itâs your birthday.â You snide playfully.
âSure y/n, sure.â Jungkook grins down at you, his laughter bounces off the walls and you feel so whole when you hear the sound. He leans forward until his arms are wrapped around you in a quick yet loving hug.
âWhatever you got to say to yourselfâŠloser.â He chuckles out, letting go of you.
âYeah, yeah. Whatever.â Your pout is so cute, Jungkook thinks.
Yoongi stands up, his gummy smile lighting up the room as he approaches you two. He stands next to you and asks if youâre alright.
âYouâve already had so much to drink, Iâm just making sure you can make it back to the sofa.â Yoongiâs shoulders shake as he laughs.
âShe can handle herself.â You hear Jungkook say in a somewhat serious tone, âShe knows how to drink.â He tries to say a little more lightly.
âBut she doesnât really have to do the penalty, right?â Yoongi asks.
âNo, I definitely do.â You laugh out, âWhereâs the shot, huh?â
Jungkook gives you a silly looking smirk as he heads towards the kitchen to fetch you that shot. Heâs only gone for a moment when you realize he has returned with the liquid of fire.
âFor you, princess.â
You roll your eyes at his little nick name heâs given you but you cannot help the blush that creeps on your cheeksâŠ
âPleaseâŠplease.â You pant, rolling your hips into his as you meet his desperate thrusts.
âPlease what, princess?â he breathes out heavily, âTold you that when youâre withââ He begins fucking into you faster, âWhen youâre with meâŠto use your words.â His pace is bruising, causing you to choke on the air around you.
The little nick name causing you to remember something you have tied burying.
âI think you should take one too, since it is your birthday after all.â You tease.
âBut Iâm the winnerâŠâ Jungkook pouts, his bottom lip jutting out so far.
âCome on, I bet you wonât.â Jimin pipes in.
âYeah dude.â You hear Nick say.
âFINE!â Jungkook throws his hands up in defeat, âBut you have to go pour it for me.â He says, looking at you.
âDone deal, baby.â
âPour me one too.â Vanessa walks up to you, her strap on her shoulder sliding down.
âOh?â you ask, but you nod your head in approval and head towards the kitchen to pour two more shots.
You return with the shots, but feel your stomach drop when you see Jungkook and Vanessa laughing together, her hand laying on his chest, his arm wrapped around her waist.
âOh!â Jungkook looks at you and smiles, âThe shots!â
âYeahâŠâ
And then Min Yoongi is at your side with his own shot, he looks at you and gives you a sweet smile and eyes full of understanding.
âLetâs take them.â He says. His hand going to yours, he squeezes it tight and you feel yourself trying to breathe.
âHere you go.â You hand the two shots to Jungkook and Vanessa, they take them and you four look at one another before raising your glasses.
âHappy birthday, Jungkook.â You whisper, taking the shot.
Hours pass, and things are starting to wind down, you think. Jin, Namjoon and Hobi are at the front door saying their goodbyes and you feel your time is coming soon too.
âUs too.â Trina says, âOur uber is almost here.â Her and Holly gather their things and make their way out the door.
âJimin, you coming with us?â Trina asks.
âUm, what about you y/n?â Jimin makes it to your side, his hand going to rub your shoulder.
âYou guys go without me, Iâm going to help clean up. Hostess duties!â You salute towards your friends and they giggle.
âOkay babe, Iâll see you soon?â Jimin goes in for a tight hug and you hug him back even tighter.
âYeah.â
âIâll help you clean up.â Yoongi offers, but you shake your head.
âNo, I couldnât ask that. Me and Vanessa got it. You go home too, itâs so late. I will come by to see you soon though.â
âAre you sure?â Yoongi asks as he catches Jungkook watching you two. âWell, if you insist y/n.â he inches towards you and to your surprise, you feel his lips leave a small kiss on your cheek. Yoongi smirks when he sees Jungkook react. Jungkook glares at the boy and Yoongi feels like hopefully he helped enough tonight.
âWhat was that for?â you feel yourself turn red.
âNothing.â He whispers before heâs turning around and walking out of the door.
You are left here shocked and confused but you cannot help but smile at Yoongiâs small gesture. He really is too sweet.
âWell,â you turn around to face Jungkook and Vanessa, âLetâs clean up,â you say to Vanessa, âAnd then Iâll get out of your hair.â
âActually,â Vanessa curls her lips upwards, âI am feeling quite tired.â Her eyes find yours, âSo maybe Jungkook can help you clean up.â
âYouâre going home already?â Jungkook looks confused. He was probably expecting birthday sex or some shit.
âMhm.â She breathes out easily, âSee you later babe.â She leans over and pecks his cheek, you immediately twist your head to look away. Vanessa notices and she fucking smiles that sly ass smile. âSee you later, y/n.â
And with that she is out of the apartment, leaving just you and Jungkook and Nick and Alien Bro.
âWe will be out on the balcony smoking, if you guys want to join.â Nick offers to you, but youâre shaking your head no.
âNah, you guys enjoy.â Jungkook says. Nick and Alien bro (You really got to learn this dudes name) are opening the back door and leaving you guys for the balcony.
âAnd then there was two.â Jungkook jokes, he chews on his lips as he watches you begin the cleaning up process. You get a large black trash bag and start throwing away the empty beer bottles and other trash around the living room and kitchen.
âHelp me clean, birthday boy.â
Jungkook grins at you and starts helping, heâs gathering the shot glasses and setting them in the kitchen sink. You two work like this for around 10-15 minutes when the place is finally looking like his apartment again.
âWell, I guess thatâs it.â You set the last trash bag in the kitchen, âYou and Nick can take these out later, right?â âYes, y/n. You did enough, I swear.â Jungkook smiles at you. âHey, whereâs your bracelet?â he dangles his wrist around, showing you his.
âOhâŠâ You dig around in your pockets until you finally find the piece of jewelry.
âLet me.â Jungkook stands closer to you, reaching his hand out, expecting you to hand over the bracelet. You place it in his hand and he grabs your wrist and clips the bracelet on.
âThere.â He breathes out, âNever take it off.â He half jokes.
âYou really like it?â
âI really love it.â Jungkook pulls you in for a hug, but heâs letting go much faster than you would like.
âWanna chill for a bit?â He asks you, his hands still on your arms from your hug that you just shared.
âFor a bit, sure.â
You two walk to the living room sofa and plop down, the long day finally catching up to you. Itâs around 1 am now, youâve been running around all day.
âSoâŠâ Jungkook looks at you with an unreadable expression, âWhatâs going on with you and this Yoongi guy?â
âWhat do you mean?â
âWas tonight like, a date for you two?â
âWhat? No?â
âReally? Could of fooled me and like, everyone else.â
âHe was just jokingâŠI think.â You groan into your hands, and laugh. âWhy?â
âI was just wondering.â He turns to face forward, his face hardening as he thinks. âIs he going to be like, your boyfriend?â
âWhat?!â you choke on your spit, âYoongi is my friend.â
âDoes he know that?â Jungkook continues to look forward, âHe was all over you.â
âHe definitely was not all over me. Oh my god. What are you getting so crazy for?â
Crazy. Thatâs the word you use, but he knows you mean jealous. Jungkook sits here, biting on his bottom lip. He has to admit, he doesnât like this âcrazyâ feeling. He feels like heâs suffocating just remembering you with Yoongi tonight. He has no right to feel crazy or jealous. He has a girlfriend for fucks sake!
âI just hope heâs treating you right.â
âHeâs just a friend Jungkook. But you know what? And if he was trying to date me?â
Jungkook feels his chest tighten, not liking the idea already.
âThen like I said, I hope heâs treating you right.â He says more softly, turning to look at you again.
âDid you enjoy your birthday?â
âIt was nice, thank you.â
âWhatâs your favorite birthday in your life so far?â
Jungkook tilts his head as he thinks, rocking it side to side. He folds his arms behind his head and lets out a long breath.
âThereâs two I can think of.â He says, âWhen I was 10 all I wanted to do was see one of those drive thru zoo things. But I wasnât expecting much because I guess birthdays and holidays were stressful for my parentsâŠâ he takes a deep breath, âthey always fought so much and so I didnât think we would be doing anything for my birthday at all. But they for once, they got along this day. They took me to the zoo and I just remember being so on edge like something may go wrongâŠbut it never did, it was a perfect day.â
âI bet 10 year old Jungkook was so cute.â
âI was the cutest!â
âAnd whatâs the second?â
âSophomore year of college.â He states quickly making you choke on air. Really? That birthday of all birthdays?
âJungkook, there has to be a better one than thatâŠâ you begin, âWe literally didnât even do anything.â
It seemed everyone happened to become busy the day of Jungkookâs birthday, everyone except you. You and Jungkook spent the day just the two of you in his dorm room watching movies and playing video games. You didnât even buy him a present, much too broke!
âThat day meant a lot to me.â Jungkook explains, âYou didnât leave my side, no matter what.â
âWell, you were my best friend.â
âAnd now?â Jungkook turns his head to face you, âAm I your best friend now?â
âJungkookâŠâ you caress his thigh, âOf course.â
Jungkook throws his head back as he smiles that bunny smile and you canât help but giggle.
âWere you worried?â
âSo worried.â He continues to laugh, âYouâre my best friend too.â
~~~~~
October
âI donât know guys!â you whine, bringing the cup of coffee in for a sip. âMarketingâŠcan someone even be passionate about that?â
âWhat did I say y/n? Youâre so concerned if youâre passionate or not, why donât you start off smallâfinding something you just like.â Yoongi offers his piece of advice but you groan.
âWhat do you think Tae?â you point your head in his direction, âWait, I am asking one of the most passionate people I know.â You complain.
âI agree with Yoongi, y/n.â Taehyung says, he drinks his water in gulps.
âOf course, who wouldnât agree with Yoongi?â You hit your head on the table a few times.
You three are seated in Yoongiâs record shop in the cozy corner of the store, discussing the burden of dreams.
âI mean, guys.â You begin, âI donât want to be making cookies forever.â
âBut I really like them.â Yoongi whispers.
âMe too,â Taehyung says as he shoves a sugar cookie down his throat. âSo good.â
âGuys, you arenât helping.â
âHonestly y/nâŠâ Yoongi stands from his seat to get some more coffee, âStop trying to force a dream to happen. It will come to you naturally, just trust in that.â
âYou make it sound so easy.â You hand Taehyung another cookie and he takes it with a grin.
âSo y/nâŠâ Taehyung swallows down the last bits of the cookie before heâs turning to face you in his chair, âHow was Jungkookâs birthday, I forgot to ask.â
âIt went really well actually.â
âWhy do you say âactuallyâ?â Taehyung laughs, âWere you expecting it to go bad?â
âItâs not thatâŠI donât know. Maybe.â
âIs it because of Vanessa?â Yoongi comes back with two fresh coffees.
âMaybe.â
âThatâs his girlfriend, right? I just donât get it. Should we come up with an evil plan to break them up?â Taehyung snickers.
âTae, chill.â You giggle.
âIâm joking but I am also totally serious.â He comments. âAnyway guys, I gotta head back to the museum. But same time next week?â
âYou know it.â You blow on your hot coffee, waving him goodbye.
The last few weeks the three of you meet up for coffee (Tae usually brings his own drink of choice, says coffee is too bitter for him) and chit chat just like now. Itâs an interesting group but you feel comfortable. After time has passed, forgiving and moving on from Taehyungâs crushing you has gotten easier and now you even find his friendship to be quite valuable. You guess they werenât kidding when they say time heals all wounds.
âAre you two ever going to tell me what happened between you? You were so tense when he first started hanging out.â Yoongi says, observant as usual.
âI will. But another day,â you smile.
âNo rush.â Yoongi drinks his coffee slowly, âWhenever youâre ready.â
âBy the way, did it work?â Yoongi asks between sips.
You canât help but raise your brows in question,
âDid what work?â
âDid Jungkook say anything? About being jealous?â He gives you a smirk.
âWhat are you talkâwait, were you purposely trying to be affectionate with me to see if Jungkook would get a rise out of it?â You ask, completely shocked. That seems almost out of character for Yoongi!
âI tried. Iâm a little awkward being the first to show affection, â he admits, âBut for you, my friend, I was willing to try.â He gives you a shy smile and you feel your heart race.
âYoongiââ
âYou really donât even have to answer because I know the truth. I could see it on his face, but I was curious if he said anything to you.â
You think back to Jungkookâs birthday and wellâŠhe technically did say something to you. He was being a little crazy (jealous) but you cannot understand why. Jungkook is your friend and not to mention he has a girlfriend.
âSorry to disappoint Yoongs, but he did not.â You decide to say.
âDid you know you avoid all eye contact when you want to lie.â Yoongi takes another sip of his coffee, his sly smile telling you he knows the truth.
âJeez, why do you pick up on things so quickly?!â you groan, âI canât even tell one little nothing lie in front of you.â
âMaybe you shouldnât try to lie to me then.â He laughs. âSo what did he say?â
âHe justâI donât know. He justâŠwanted to know what was up with you basically.â
Yoongi opens his mouth to say âAhâ and then continues to drink his coffee.
âHeâs not going to be rude to you or anything!â you quickly say, âheâs just a little protective over me, is all.â
âOh? Thatâs all?â Yoongi teases.
âHeyâŠâ you set your cup down and fold your hands in your lap, âWhat makes you think Jungkook feels the same way?â
Yoongi breathes out slowly, his fingers tapping against his mug when he looks up at you and smiles.
âThereâs an obvious tension between you two, â he starts, âThe way he looks at you. That honestly gave everything away. His eyes always find you, no matter what.â Yoongi quietly chuckles, âThe way heâs threatened by me. He doesnât even try to hide it.â Yoongi thinks for a moment, âAndâŠyou two, the way you are togetherâŠgod, itâs like watching two people who are in a relationship but donât know theyâre in a relationship.â
âWhatâwhat do you mean by that?â you pry further. Curious about your own dynamic with Jungkook that maybe even you canât see.
âI donât know like, you guys act like boyfriend and girlfriend already!â he laughs, âThatâs when I knew I didnât stand a chance.â
âYoongiâŠâ
âItâs okay,â his gummy smile lights up his whole face, âbeing your friend has been so much more rewarding.â
You feel yourself smile at his wordsâŠalthough, you do feel bad. But keeping a friend like Yoongi around has been amazing. And maybe if you werenât already in love with someone elseâŠno, you shouldnât even think that, thatâs not fair.
âThanks Yoongs.â
~~~~~~
âWe need to talk.â
Jimin is shoving his way through Jungkookâs front door, his hair pushed back in frustration like his fingers have been running through it for hours.
âJesus man, itâs like 8 in the fucking morning.â Jungkookâs low, groggy voice booms from his chest.
âThis couldnât wait. I have to be at work at 9 and Iâve been up all night with the same one thing on my mind.â Jimin takes off his shoes and makes his way to the couch.
âAnd whatâs that?â Jungkook asks, clearly annoyed.
âYou need to tell y/n how you feel.â Jimin decides to go with the straight forward approach, he does not have the time to beat around the bush today.
Jungkook closes the door and swings around to face Jimin,
âHuh?â
âListen man, Iâve been racking my brain about it all fucking night. Itâs got to be you. You have to do it, she wonât.â
âWhy the fuck would I do that?â
âGrow the fucking balls, man!â Jimin sits back on the sofa, his head falling into the cushion.
âLook dude, I donât know what youââ
âYouâre in love with her, you have been since freshmen year. You guys fucked, I know. She didnât talk to you for however long, I know that too. But come on man, itâs so clear how you both feel.â
Jungkook continues to stand here, not knowing what to say. Where is all this coming from?
âI have a girlfriend, Jimin.â
âOh please, give me a fucking break.â Jimin stands up, walking towards Jungkook. âThere is almost zero chemistry between you two. Like emotional chemistryâŠI donât know what your sex life is likeâŠâ Jimin holds up a hand, âAnd I donât want to know.â
âWasnât going to tell you anyway,â Jungkook pouts. âListen, how can you be so sure y/n would even feel the same way?â
âCanât you just fucking trust me?â Jimin yells out, exasperated.
âDid she say the words Jimin?â Jungkook becomes very serious, making Jimin shudder. âDid she tell you she has feelings for me?â his dark eyes pierce into Jiminâs.
Jimin looks down at the ground, feeling defeated.
âYou know I canât tell you that.â Jimin finally says, âYou just have to have the courage man. Are you really going to go your whole life not telling her? Why torture yourself like that?â
Jungkook stands here feeling so lost, and fucking emotional. Like, he could god damn cry about it.
âBecause,â Jungkook sniffles into his sleeve. âItâs guaranteed she would be in my life. I canât risk losing her. I couldnât handle that manâŠâ Jungkook begins to choke up.
Jimin walks closer to Jungkook and pulls him in for a tight hug, Jungkook keeps his arms to his side.
âI know. Iâm sorry. Iâm sorry.â Jimin whispers.
âI think thoughâŠthat there will be a moment where you finally have the courageâŠâ
âI donât know.â
âYou will, Jungkook. When the timing is rightâŠbut I donât know when that is for you two.â
âI really do love herâŠâ Jungkook allows a few tears to slip from his closed eyes into Jiminâs shoulder. âIâm so frustrated like, all the time.â He admits, âSeeing her, talking to her, I just want to tell her how I feel. I hate how hard I have to try just to stay in the zone of friendship. But you donât understand the riskâŠâ Jungkook leans back, pulling away from Jimin. âIf she doesnât feel the same, I could lose her.â His puffy eyes avoid Jimin. âCan I handle a loss like that again?â
âBut sheâŠâ Jimin has to bite his tongueâŠseeing his two best friends like this hurts his heart beyond belief.
âYeah, I understand.â Jimin decides to say, âBut I think you might be surprised.â
Jungkook pulls his brows together, his face scrunching up and he scoffs.
âMaybe, but maybe not.â
âIâm sorry to bring this all on you so early in the morningâŠIâve just been so worried about you twoâŠâ Jimin starts to put his shoes back on.
âMaybe you could stay until you really need to leave for work? You still go like 45 minutes, right?â Jungkook practically begs with sad, soft eyes.
âSure.â Jimin takes his shoes back off and grabs a hold of Jungkookâs shoulder, âLetâs sit down for a while.â
The two boys head to the couch and take a seat, leaving little space between them. Jungkook needs the presence of another human being right now, he needs to feel real live warmth. Jimin wishes he could mend Jungkookâs cracked heart but he knows only you can do that. But Jimin can try his best. The two sit in comfortable silence, the only sound that can be heard is Jungkookâs light sniffling and Jimin humming a soft tune.
âItâs almost 9.â Jimin mentions regretfully.
âI know. Thanks for staying for a bit.â
âOf course.â Jimin rises from the couch, âYou guys are my best friends but you two sure are fucking idiots.â He smiles and makes his way to leave.
~~~~~~
Bored. So fucking bored. Trina and Holly went out for dinner tonight and you were not invited! You kind of wonder whatâs going on between themâŠbut thatâs a thought for another day, right now you are so fucking bored.
Itâs Friday night and you donât know what to do with yourself. Jimin has some party heâs going to tonight but you didnât really feel like going so you rejected his invitation, Jin and the guyâs invited you over for a cookout but you said no because you didnât feel like driving all the way to Jinâs placeâyou know, lazy.
And you havenât heard from Jungkook all day so heâs probably tired from work or worseâwith Vanessa. But would it hurt to try? To see what heâs up to?
y/n 9:04pm
hi
Jungkook 9:10pm
Hi
y/n 9:12pm
Whatcha up to tonight?
Jungkook 9:13pm
Nothing really, you?
y/n 9:13pm
nothing eitherâŠ
y/n 9:13pm
Wanna have a movie night with some wine?
Jungkook 9:20pm
Sure:)
Jungkook 9:23pm
Lemme guess, I have to bring the wine
y/n 9:23pm
Bingo!
Jungkook 9:50pm
Iâm almost there
Not even 5 minutes later you hear your door being knocked on, and you yell a âcome inâ. Jungkook pushes the door open and finds you sitting on the couch wrapped up in your favorite blanket. He shuts the door behind him, and walks to the kitchen for some wine glasses. You two only nod at one another in greeting, getting comfortable in each others presence.
âI brought 2 bottles,â Jungkook says, âOne for you, one for me.â
âWow, youâre so smart.â You smile up at him and his heart clenches in his chest. Your smile is so special, itâs so soft and so fucking pretty he almost cannot handle it.
âY-Yeah.â He sets the glasses down on the table that sits in front of the sofa. âWhat movie do you have in mind?â
âYou can choose.â
âIron Man?â âNo, not that.â
âFine.â He pouts, âLetâs find something new on Netflix.â
An hour into some random drama, you find yourself getting sleepy.
âWakey wakey.â You feel Jungkookâs breath on your ear, you open your eyes a little wider to prove your consciousness.
âI am awakeâŠhey,â you suddenly get an idea, âRemember a little while ago you said you felt like our friendship kind of started over?â
âHm? Yeah?â
âWould if we do?â
âI donât get it?â Jungkook asks clearly confused.
âLetâs play a game! Of getting to know each other better. Everything out on the table.â You say with a pleased smile, obviously loving your own idea.
âhmmmmmâŠâ Jungkook wraps his blanket closer around his body, âSure.â
âYay! Iâll pull out a list of questions from the internet.â You get your phone and google a list of questions. âYou ready?â you say with a wink.
âI guess so.â He playfully shrugs his shoulders and shows you a small smile.
âOkay oneâŠWhatâs your favorite way to spend a day off?â
âhmmâŠsleeping in, working out, playing video games, making videos, sleeping some more, hanging out with you.â
âWow, honored.â You tease. âFor me, itâs sleeping all day.â
âThatâs it? Thatâs your whole answer?â Jungkook giggles.
âWhat type of music are into to?â
ây/nâŠâ Jungkook whines, âYou already know these answersâŠâ
âWeâre pretending we donât!â
âFine, I like almost all genres but I really prefer ballads.â
âI like music with meaningful lyrics,â you say.
âI agree.â Jungkook grins at you.
âNextâŠDo you have a favorite holiday. Why or why not?â
Jungkook nibbles on his lips as he thinksâŠis he honest?
âI use to hate holidays.â He admits softly, slightly slurring thanks to the wine, âBut now itâs Christmas and New Yearâs. And why? Both reasons are because of you.â
You feel your cheeks become warmer and probably pinker.
âMine too.â You say quickly, âNext,â you are in a rush to change the subject. âDo you want a family of your own?â
âOne day, yes. With the right personâŠâ
âIâm the same.â You scroll through the questions, âIf you had only one senseâŠhearing, touch, sight, etc, which would you want?â
âTouch. Imagine not being able to feel things?â Jungkook asks, he thinks about not being able to feel the soft touch of sheets on a bed, the feel of your hair between his fingers, your skin, your lipsâwait, he needs to chill. âYeah, touch.â
âReally? I would choose sight.â You say, âWho do you admire most in this world?â
âMom.â Jungkook whispers, âShe was so strong, she went through so much yet still found the strength to love me.â
âYou.â Your hand finds Jungkookâs, you hold on to him softly, âMy answer is you.â
ây/nâŠâ Jungkook leans into your side, âThank you.â
You clear you throat and continue scrolling through your phone, looking for the next question.
âIf you found out today is your last day on Earth, what would you do?â
âExactly what Iâm doing right now.â
âHonestly? Me too.â You whisper, you feel your heart beginning to race as you and Jungkook admit that if it were your last day, you would spend it together. Somehow the thought almost seems romantic to youâŠthatâs obviously your imagination but you can dream.
âWhatâs the last thing you do at night?â
Jungkook wiggles his brows at you and you hit his arm, laughing.
âGross.â You giggle. âSomething besides that.â
âWhat? You think itâs gross to mastââ
âDonât!â you yell out laughing. âDonât be gross.â
âEveryone does it y/nâŠI bet even you.â Jungkook voice goes low. âin fact, I have a question for you.â Jungkook scoots closer to you, âWhen was the last time you got yourself off?â your eyes go wide, âItâs not like youâre seeing anyoneâŠunless you and Yoonââ
âNo!â You begin to panic, âIâm not seeing anyone, youâre right.â
Jungkook releases a long breath and he smiles, âThought so.â Then heâs scooting even closer to you.
âHow do you touch yourself y/n?â He slurs out, âWith your fingers only? Perhaps you use a vibrator?â
You push your head back in shock, thereâs no way in hell Jungkook just asked you that? Is he drunk? Barely.
âWhy do you want to know that?â you scoot a little closer to him too.
âBest friends know this type of stuff about each other all the time, donât they?â
âNot reallyâŠbut Iâll play. I use both.â
Jungkook raises a brow in amusement, he bites on his bottom lip as his smirks at you.
âYou own a vibrator?â Jungkook chuckles darkly, âHow come I didnât know?â
âWhy would I tell you that?â
âI bet Jimin knows.â
âFine, he does.â
Jungkook narrows his eyes at you as he tries to hold in his slight laughter, his hand comes to his mouth and he chuckles into it.
âThought soâŠwhenâs the last time you used it?â
âLast night before bed.â
âSo, itâs the last thing you did at night?â Jungkook points his finger at you knowingly and you canât help but laugh.
âOkay, I see where this is going. Fine, I get. We all masturbate. Itâs completely normal and not gross and a totally valid answer for something you do before bed.â You throw your hands up as you giggle.
âThank you.â Jungkook knees touch yours as he scoots just an inch closer, âBut I wasnât trying to make a point, I was genuinely curious about you.â He admits in a deep voice and you squeeze your thighs together, an action that does not go unnoticed by him. His eyes land to your lap and he chuckles. His voice is so low and inviting as he speaks, âAre you curious about me too?â
âWhat do you mean?â
âAbout whenâs the last time Iââ
âFine, whenâs the last time?â you ask lightly.
âRight before I came here.â He admits easily.
âInteresting.â
You and Jungkook stare at one another for what feels like at least an hour but in reality probably seconds. But his dark gaze is so raw and powerful, you find yourself leaning into his space.
âThe last time I used my vibrator was yes, last night. But the last time I touched myself was tonight. Before you arrived.â
Jungkook nods his head in understanding, or maybe itâs approval? Either way he nods his head as a sly smile creeps on his lips.
âCan I ask you what you thought about?â Even Jungkook widens his eyes in surprise as he asks that. Where did that confidence come from? âSorry thatâs TMI.â He quickly rushes to say, not wanting to really hear your answer because he shouldnât know what you fantasize about especially if heâs not in said fantasies.
You lean your head back and snicker. You wish you had the fucking courage to tell him the truth. Him. You thought about him.
In your fantasy his head was between your legs, licking you up and making you squirm. He would moan into your greedy cunt, basking in your juices. God, you can just picture it now. His mouth and nose covered in you, the shine on his face evidence of how well heâs eaten you. His fingers still buried inside you as he lifts his head up to smirk down at you, his hair a fucking mess from how much you have tugged on it.
Youâd be lying if you said you werenât thinking about it right now and getting so heavily turned on. Your chest heaves just a little more than usual, and thereâs an ache between your legs that you wish Jungkook would soothe. Your fantasy of him going down on you? You took that straight from your memories.
âNot going to say anything?â Jungkook leans in a little closer.
âSorry, just thinking.â
âAboutâŠ?â
âYou.â
Jungkookâs eyes expand as he processes what you just say untilâ
âWait, wait. That came out wrong.â Your hands scramble to hold on to his shoulders. âI mean, I was thinking about you. But not like that.â You lie. Because you have to lie.
âOhâŠright, that makes sense.â Jungkook visibly deflates at your confession.
âAnyway, yeah. Thatâs a TMI for sure.â You laugh awkwardly and Jungkook leans back away from you.
âFor sure.â Jungkook leans back on the sofa, âSo, whatâs the next question?â
âEver had a threesome?â you ask from your own brain.
âYou already know I have.â
âWith two girls or with another guyâŠ?â
âTwo girls.â
âWould you ever with another guy?â
âMaybe if itâs with a girl that doesnât mean something to meâŠbut if itâs with someone I care about, probably not. I think I may be too possessive. Donât wanna share.â
âAh, I see.â
âWhat about you?â
âI would do both.â You admit. âSounds like funâŠâ
âIt is fun,â Jungkook laughs, âBut thereâs something special about just being with one person, if itâs specialâŠâ
âHave you ever had sex with someone special?â
âYes.â
Oh. Jungkookâs never been in a serious relationship since youâve known him so you werenât expecting him to answer that with a yesâŠbut he is with Vanessa now. So obviouslyâŠ
âI see.â
âWhatâs the next question?â
âIâm looking up a new list. Itâs kind of sexy, is that okay?â
âA list of dirty questions? Iâm down.â Jungkook smirks and you feel the heat between your legs grow.
âOkay the first one is asking if youâre a virgin and I think the whole town knows the answer to thatâŠâ
âHey! Whatâs that supposed to mean?!â
You laugh out, âNothing, nothing.â Then continue scrolling, âOkay, opinion on shower sex?â
âHmm, Iâve done, and I will do it again.â
âFor me, itâs a little uncomfortable but Iâll do it,â you say, âboob or butt guy?â
âFuck. Both of them, can I say both?â Jungkook pleads and you giggle.
âSure, both.â Your eyes light up when you find the next question. âOooh. What is your most embarrassing sex story?â
âOh godâŠokay. When I was in high school I was getting head from this girlâŠâ
âUh huhâŠand then?â
âWe got caught by our teacher and thatâs a total mood killer right?â
âRight?â
âWell, when the teacher was scolding me I popped another boner. And I was wearing sweats so it was super obvious and she was trying so hard not to make it obvious. But I donât know, my body betrayed me.â
âYou got hard from getting scolded?â
âApparently.â
You burst out into giggles, the story absolutely killing you. Who does that? Who pops a boner from getting scoldedâŠby their fucking teacher?
âYour turn, your turn.â
âOkayâŠone time I was giving headâŠâ
âUh huhâŠand then?â he copies you.
âAnd I guess I swallowed his cum too fast because it shot out of my nose like milk.â
âWhat the fuck y/n.â Jungkook laughs out hysterically. âThatâs so awesome.â
âIt wasnât awesome Jungkook, it was embarrassing.â
âPerspective.â
âIn what world is someoneâs perspective on this awesome?â âMine.â
âWell, youâre fucking weird.
âMaybe so.â Jungkook continues to laugh, âWhatâs next?â
âDo you prefer to give or receive?â
âWho doesnât love to receive? Thatâs obvious. But me? I am a giver, 100%â
And heâs right. Hence why youâre able to use the memory of him going down on you as good masturbation material.
âI see.â
âI think I am a giver too.â You look down at your phone, âBut who doesnât love to receive?â
âYou do give nicely.â Jungkook whispers, âAnyway whatâs the next one?â
âDo you like sexting?â
âFucking love it. I love the dirty words and pictures.â He admits.
âYeah, me too.â
What would it be like to be texting Jungkook throughout the work day, sending one another your dirtiest fantasies and pictures to go along with it.
âIâll read the next one nowâŠIf I came home from work stressed, how you do you relax me?â your eyes go wide when you realize, âWait, pretends itâs asking about someone else. So a girl youâre with comes home from work stressed, how do you relax her?â
Jungkook is quiet for a few moments, he chews on his bottom lip and breathes out heavily.
âHow would I relax you? I mean, some girl?â
âY-Yes.â
âFirst, I would kiss you breathless.â
âYou mean her.â
âRight. I would kiss her lips over and over, taking off one article of clothing at a time, sit her down on the couch while I make my way into the kitchenâŠpour her a glass of her favorite wine and hand it to her. Then I would kiss down her body, telling her sweet words. How much I love her, how much I missed her today, how much she means to me. I will kiss down until I am taking off her pants along with her underwearâŠâ âAnd then?â you breathe out.
âKiss her sweet, soft skinâŠtaste her. Taste how fucking good she tastes. Eat her out while she sips on her wineâŠâ
âOh nice.â You laugh a little.
âMake her come all over my tongue, getting her drunk on her orgasm.â
âAnd her wine.â You point out.
âYes, both. After she comes, I will kiss back up her body and hold her.â Jungkook releases short breath after the other. âMake her feel wanted.â
âThat does sound relaxingâŠâ
âYou like?â
âYes.â
âThen maybeââ
âNext question is âWhat turns you on almost instantly?â
âDirty talk.â
âI see.â
âWhatââ
âYou have to answer too, remember?â
âMy stomach being touched.â You admit. âHow do you feel about toys?â
âNot against them, could be fun to try out.â
âI agreeâŠhow do you feel about blindfolds?â
âYou answer first.â Jungkook says shyly.
âIâm into it.â
âBeing blinded? Or blinding someone?â
âBoth? Yes, both.â
âFuck, me too.â He folds his arms behind him as he leans back further into the sofa.
âBoth for you too?â
âYes. It would be boring if I was only into one thing right?â
You laugh, âYes, I think we think similarly.â
âInteresting.â
âVery.â You smile at him and he smirks, âWould you like to watch me touch myself?â
âYesââ
ââWait, like your partner, not me.â You both say at the same time.
âOh, well yes.â Jungkook says again. âWatching your fingers travel down to your pussy, rubbing your clitâŠwell, not you but you get my point.â He says, his breathing becoming heavy again.
âOh. I would also like to watch you.â
âBut not me.â
âExactly.â
âSpit or swallow?â
âI like a girl who swallows.â
âI like to swallow most times and if I donât swallow itâs because Iâm letting the guy come on my face or my tits orââ
âGod damn it, y/n.â Jungkook breathes out erratically. His hand goes to his crotch as he tries to hide his growing member.
âRough or sensual?â
âFuck. Both, definitely both.â
âI agree. Why not both all the time?â you squeeze your thighs together again as you watch Jungkook shift uncomfortably in his seat on the couch.
âWould you let me pleasure you as you drive? I mean, your partner. Sorry itâs just the way the questions readâŠâ
âYes. I would.â
âSeems a bit unsafeâŠbut I would give it a try.â You say, âDo you like your hair to be pulled?â you ask with a smirk, already knowing the answer.
âFucking love it.â He admits between heavy breaths, âBut I like to pull hair too.â He winks.
âI do too, but I prefer being the one pulling.â You wink back. âAre you quiet during sex?â
âIâI donât knowâŠAm I?â Jungkook looks into your eyes, and you blank. Is he actually referring to the time you two had sex? Without him getting weird? âYou arenât the quietest.â You admit, âBut itâs so fucking hot.â
âWell, you definitely arenât quiet.â He says, âCan barely touch you and youâre already whimpering out.â
âDepends who the guy is.â
âWell, when itâs with meâŠsorry, I shouldnât bring that up.â
âRightâŠâ your fingers find their way into Jungkookâs hair, âBut why not?â
ây/nâŠâ he warns and you chuckle.
âWhat?â you decide to play innocent. âIt was so long ago, Jungkook. We should be able to talk about it by now.â
But Jungkook canât. Because although itâs almost been 4 years, itâs still so fresh for him. Not just the feeling of being inside you but the emotional shit he was feeling too.
âIâll tell you one thing and one thing only about that night,â Jungkook decides to say, his hand goes to yours and gently places it back in your lap. âIt felt so fucking good.â He whispers out and you feel all the heat in your body rush to your aching pussy.
âOh.â You breathe out erratically. âI guess, I would have to agree.â
âShould we sleep soon?â Jungkook leans back as he asks you this.
âDonât you want me to share one thing about that night?â
ââŠSure.â
âYouâŠfelt soâŠgoodâŠinside meâŠâ you say between deep breaths.
âYou felt even better, y/n.â
Itâs Saturday morning, and you find yourself waking up on the couch, a big blanket draped around your body and you canât help but snuggle into it, not wanting to get up quite yet.
On the other side of the couch is a still sleeping Jungkook, his light snores filling your ears. You two didnât even finish your wine last night, so you are waking up hang over free. The sun is shining today, itâs rays peeking through your window blinds and you want to throw the blanket over your head to hide yourself from the brightness but you decide to actually wake up and get up instead.
You throw the blanket off your body and on to Jungkook, who gratefully takes it and cuddles deeper into the covers. You stand up and head towards the bathroom to wash up, turning on a hot shower.
You wonder what youâll be up to today, will you stay in? Go out? Hang with the girls? By the way, did they ever come home last night? You stop by Hollyâs room to find it empty. Interesting, you guess they went to Trinaâs.
The shower is ready for you so you slip in and let the warm water cascade over your tired body. You shampoo, condition and wash your body, when you hear insistent knowing on the bathroom door.
ây/n!!! I gotta pee!!â Jungkookâs worried voice is heard over the running water, âThatâs it, Iâm coming in okay?!â
And before you can respond, you hear the door being swung open and Jungkook lifting the toilet seat lid up and releasing himself. You fucking laugh. He literally says âAaahhhâ for the same amount of time he is peeing.
âFucking finally, I thought I was going to piss myself.â He says when heâs finishing up.
âSorry.â You reply lamely. âShower felt too good to leave.â
âWell, hurry up so we can go get something to eat. Iâm so hungry!â
âOkay, okay.â And with that, Jungkook is leaving the bathroom, shutting the door behind him.
You finish washing up, stepping out of the shower and drying off. You quickly leave the bathroom in just your towel to head to your bedroom. Thankfully, Jungkook is on the couch watching some show on Netflixâtoo busy to notice your half naked state.
You get dressed in a rush, not wanting Jungkook to wait much longer for you. You settle for some jeans and a cute yellow shirt.
âI like yellow on you.â Jungkook says when he sees you. âPretty.â
You are sure your cheeks are turning a nice shade of red at his compliment but you cover them with your hands to hide yourself.
âThanks JK.â
#bts#bts smut#bts fluff#bts angst#jeon jungkook#jungkook x reader#jungkook smut#jungkook angst#jungkook fluff
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Day6 Reaction to s/o learning their instrument while they're away
Type: Fluff, angst in Dowoon dont know what happened wasnt me
Word Count: 2.865
A/n: I took some creative freedom with why they were away but that is it. Keep in mind, I have no experience with instrument except for when I played the piano in 5th grade for like two weeks. Anyways, I hope you enjoy! - Moon
TW: small cuts, fight, second hand embarrassment
Sungjin
Sungjin was absolutely and devastatingly exhausted. His own guitar case felt like it was weighing him down tremendously, and he had a huge headache. Jae and Wonpil arguing in the back of the car was not helping in any way. It has been going on since they left the airport. He rubbed at his temples tiredly pressing his head against the cool window from his place in the passenger seat next to their manager.Â
Still, he couldnât help the small smile that tugged at his lips as he thought about seeing you, probably curled up in the couch cheeks puffed from the snack you were inhaling. The pounding in his head lightened at the cute sight he would soon get to enjoy as he played with the loose threads of his old button up shirt.Â
True to Sungjinâs imagination, your form was sitting on the couch. Not true to his imagination, you were actually bent over something in your lap, lightly humming and bopping your head to the rhythm being produced by your still clumsy fingers. The guitar in your lap had gotten lighter as the days went by without your boyfriend, and in replacement of his touch, leaving your fingertips warm and tingling, it was small cuts you hadnât bothered to bandage as it disrupted you when playing.
 You missed Sungjin an abnormal amount. The cold spot in the bed or him making weird faces at you through the mirror in the mirror when brushing your teeth. You missed all of it. With a slight tremble in your chest you started playing the chorus to âYou Were beautifulâ.
You were so focused on trying to get it right you didnât notice the door closing only to startle when you slightly looked up through your lidded eyes seeing the shadow looming over the coffee table. With a small yelp of surprise you jumped immediately looking up only to find your boyfriend staring at you with wide eyes.Â
His surprised expression made you shrink into yourself. You threw your head into your hands in pure embarrassment letting the guitar gently slide off your lap, hitting the floor with a soft thump. âCan you just pretend you didnât see that I canât believe I even tried learning all that by myself Iâ you cut yourself off with an un-pleased sigh shaking your head and looking at him with pleading eyes.Â
Your boyfriend continued in his frozen state for about five seconds before breaking out in the biggest smile rushing around the coffee table in which you panicked trying to get away from him with a squeal, but being too slow im the excitement that was usually in a much dormant state in Sungjin. The wrinkles near the corner of his eyes deepened adoringly, and his chest shook with soft laughter while he held you close.Â
There was a fond twinkle in his eye as Sungjin forgot any tiredness that clung to his bones and kissed the tips of your fingertips while maintaining eye contact. He kept your hands encased in his when scolding you for having such low faith in yourself and softly encouraging you. He would probably put little stitch band-aids on your fingertips and continue teaching you, sitting you on his lap and scolding you when you lose focus with a sharp poke at your ribs smiling when you giggled. This man just fell impossibly more in love with you.
âYou shouldnât say those things, look at you love, learning all alone and doing so well. I'm so proud. Would you rather have the elmo band-aids or the stitch band-aids⊠I donât know about you but Elmo kinda creeps me out. Just five more minutes little love then you can go mug Young k with Dowoon. Donât look at me like that! You finally have a teacher and you take him for granted. The audacity-â
Jae
Jae was a thin hair away from just ripping his hair out. He didnât believe the kpop industry would take very kindly to him going bald, but he had come to a point where he didnât really care about what people thought anymore. But thinking about you not being able to play with his hair anymore while he drifted off to sleep with his head on your chest severely upset him.
 Jae had gotten stuck in another limbo, stuck in the studio and in his own head desperately trying to finish any of the unfinished songs left in his computer files. He missed you so much, he eventually called it quits, deciding to go home to you, who he hadnât seen in days.
Just the thought about seeing you energized his previously exhausted self. He never could get sick of you. Every day, every week was a new adventure, a new chapter, all with his favorite person in the world. The night sky, although beautiful, seemed to mock him, reminding him of how late it was, meaning you were most probably asleep.Â
Opening the door to his apartment, he heard soft music. He briefly recognized âI Need Somebodyâ, and thought you were playing it from your phone. All his thoughts came to a halting stop when he saw you perched on the bed, in his shirt, playing the melody of the previously mentioned song.
You had hair falling into your eyes with your eyebrows slightly scrunched trying not to mess up and heavily focused. Jae had loudly yelled in surprise, causing you to flinch and look up shocked at the sudden surprise. When you saw it was just him, you had comically thrown your hands in the air yelling at him about how it was supposed to be a surprise.Â
The irritated look on your face vanished as you went up to give him a light hug with a kiss, softly smiling at him. Meanwhile Jae, was completely out of it, lovestruck eyes while he instinctively returned your affection.
âCome Jae, you look like you havenât slept in ages, your eyes are so sunken babeâ, you had softly whispered to him, rubbing the soft skin under his eyes, the way you were always soft with him when he came back from the studio. You slept in the same bed for the first time in what had been days, Jae tightly clutching on to you.
 He may have not been completely there at the moment, but in the morning when he had time to process everything, he was a changed man. He wouldnât stop laughing and giggling excitedly, eagerly wanting to hear everything you had learnt. He even poked fun at you when you made a mistake. But it was all lovingly as he also praised you non stop while looking at you with his messy hair and big smile next to you on the couch. He had so much inspiration now. To finish what had been left behind.
âPop off queen who gave you this much talent, you couldnât even tell me what bass was last time we talked, which was like a week ago. Might just make you play when I donât feel like playing. Give you a wig and people wonât know the difference! Why are you booing me, I'm right?â
Young K
Young Kâs foot tapping on the floor of the car was the only sound that filled the car aside from the soft sound of the carâs engine and tires. He was absolutely spent, having to have stayed in a different city for a show he was invited to that was filmed far away from his home.Â
Far away from you. Young K could tell his manager was starting to get irritated, but Young K was already massively annoyed and too far in his own world to really care. He missed the pine scent of his sheets, and he missed you.
It was not a good combination. When he got to his place he quietly thanked the manager, getting his bag before trying to ignore every urge telling him to run into the building and fall into his soft bed with you in his arms. When he opened the door, your keys were there, so he knew you were in the building. That thought filled him with more relief than it should have.Â
He did have to admit, hearing âI smileâ this early in the day was odd as you usually saved the more mellow songs for later in the night. Young K told himself he had many euphoric moments in his life, but seeing you staring at a sheet of paper with so much determination and a bass guitar in your arms came pretty close to the top.
The absolute warmth that exploded in his chest was a feeling he would not forget in a long time. He could feel his lips slightly curl up in fondness as your hands shook while your eyes wavered unsurely between your hands on the strings and the video on your laptop sitting further on the edge of the bed. Your face scrunched up before you sighed and stared dejectedly at the instrument on your lap.Â
âWhy so sad love?" His voice made you instantly sit up, pushing the instrument gently off your lap. You crawled to the edge of the bed where Young K had already gotten closer where he met you tenderly running his hand through your hair, and he curved his hand around the back of your head bringing your forehead to his abdomen.
He brushed his thumb over where your hairline met the sensitive skin of the back of your neck immensely enjoying being back at your side. Your hands were clutching the back of his shirt, and your simple touch brought a warm feeling to his chest. You both leaned back as Young Kâs chest started to rumble with laughter âYou should have waited for me, it would have been easier if I could teach youâ, he softly said, pushing your hair back from your face causing you to lightly laugh.
 âI wanted to surprise you, but I didnât get that far anyways. Canât become a prodigy in one day I guessâ. Young K smiled again, promising to himself to help you as much as he could as he put his hand fondly on top of your head.
âYouâre doing so good, just move your finger up a little, youâre plucking the c chord instead of the e chord during the chorus, donât look at me like that iâm trying to help?! I wouldnât put you on my level, but I think youâre doing really well. Iâm hungry now, what do you want? No- What do you want? I am okay with anything just tell me-â
Wonpil
Wonpil was trying his hardest not to think about you. From the way you got excited when you got to see the moon in the cloudy sky to the way you smiled when you saw the neighborâs cat while getting the mail.Â
He was happy to be on a trip with her sister, he hadnât had much time to be with her in recent, well forever really. While you had been invited, you hadnât been able to attend due to work. Wonpil did his best to keep his mind off you and enjoy the trip, he just hadnât spent this long without you in a while.Â
Even so, he still had a fun time with his sister and her boyfriend creating many memories. He didnât regret it, but he was extremely happy to come back to you. Opening the door to your apartment, he dropped his suitcase by the door, an excited smile tugging at his lips as he traveled through the apartment with his arms spread knowing you would embrace him as soon as you saw him. He felt so giddy, he didnât even notice the broken keyboard sounds ringing throughout the living space.
His smile fell in a comical way, his face morphing into one of confusion instead. He recognized a broken rendition of âMary had a little Lambâ, and tilted his head as he opened the door to your room seeing you with really big headphones on your head staring down at the keyboard with the most offended look on your face.
 How dare this keyboard not give you its secrets! Wonpil couldnât help the laugh that escaped his chest, not mocking you, but he just thought you were so cute. He lightly touched your shoulder causing you to jump, and the slight movement of your head caused the headphones to slide off your head. It didnât matter much. You instantly dove into his arms, pressing the side of your face against his chest.
He felt warmth flood his chest as his hand encased the back of your head while he pressed his lips to the top, closing his eyes in bliss enjoying having you in his arms again. He leaned back from the brace as his eyes flashed with amusement and yours with slight embarrassment. He lightly laughed, eyes crinkling. He cradled your face in his hands, a teasing lilt to his voice, âWhat were you trying to do, hmm?â He could feel your face grow hot under his finger tips.
 âI was just trying to surprise you. I felt bad for not being able to go with youâ. He shook his head, hands playfully pinching your cheeks as you whined. âYou shouldnât act that way, I understood from the beginning. It must have been hard for you. Here, come, your lovely boyfriend will make this easier for youâ.
âY/n the keys will not bite prEsS dOWn, no, no keyboards do not have to be oiled, this is a musical instrument not a mechanical vehicle. You are so cute. What am I gonna do with you? No, you can not play the keyboard with your forehead, DO NOT put your foot on the keys. I donât care if itâs for the vine.Â
Dowoon
Dowoon was beating himself up. Looking back at what happened a few hours ago made his chest tight. He couldnât help but wince at the words both of you had thrown at each other. You had been with each other for so long, and when his lovely mother asked him when he would propose, although with good intentions, it put pressure on him.
 He was still young. He had mentioned it to you in a joking manner, but there was a misunderstanding and you thought he was blowing it off as he didnât see a future with you.Â
Somehow feelings were hurt, and the fight escalated. And Dowoon decided he was a coward because it was when you had started stuttering through your words and avoiding eye contact, he knew. He knew he had pushed you across a line that might not be able to be crossed again.Â
He panicked. He was really good at doing that wasnât he? He left. He took a bus and went to the nearest hotel he could find. There he was sitting on the edge of the too perfectly made bed with his head in his hands.
Had he just ruined his precious relationship because he was scared of what the future could or could not hold? Why did he have to run away? Why couldnât he just stay? Most importantly, how badly had he hurt you?
 With a sigh he stood up, and he got on the bus back to your apartment. Staring at the door, the fact you were just on the other side and hurting is what pushed him to open it with the key you had given him. Opening the door, he was met with silence and darkness. Have you already gone? He walked through the apartment, hope dwindling with every step.Â
Then he heard a soft thump thump thump. His heart seemed to match with it, and as he walked to his studio which held his spare drum set, he thought of what he could say to make it better. Opening the door, he saw you softly hitting the drum with one stick, as if testing the waters and humming along to âWhen you Love Someoneâ. Dowoon couldnât fight the sad smile that broke out on his face, and the absolute warmth that filled his chest.Â
Why did he ever even doubt your future with him? There was no person more perfect for him than you. He stood next to you, softly taking your hand in his and guiding your hand to the right beat, although a bit broken. When your sad eyes looked up into his, forgiving in nature but still frustrated beyond belief, he knew he could still fix things. You were you, and Dowoon was Dowoon. You always somehow found your way back to each other. Â
âNo no, put your hands higher on the stick, no lower, now higher...a bit lower. No, Y/n drum sticks do not belong in my throat. What do you mean I have no room to talk, I thought we were over the fight. I would marry you in this life and the next! Why are you looking at me like that? I am not cute, I am handsome and overflowing with testosterone. Oooh are those gummies?
#day6 reactions#day6 reaction#day6 fluff#day6 angst#day6 fanfic#day6 fanfiction#day6 imagines#day6 scenarios#kpop reactions#day6 x reader#jae x reader#jae imagines#jae scenarios#sungjin x reader#sungjin imagines#sungjin scenarios#young k x reader#young k imagines#young k scenarios#younghyun x reader#younghyun imagines#wonpil x reader#wonpil scenarios#wonpil fluff#dowoon x reader#dowoon imagine#dowoon fluff#dowoon angst
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Bambi, Chapter 1
You are my Bambi, girl, I am your candy, tell me what are you waiting for?
Summary: As an archaeologist who works on the Ancient Greece, you were on the verge of excavationsâ session. While you have been preparing your team, you learned that your institute decided on your team has to work with another team as they wanted the outcome as a collaboration. The head of other team was your biggest rival, a scumbag in your eyes: Byun Baekhyun.
You two were supposed to work together for three months, in a Greek Island, Chios.
Could you manage to not kill Byun Baekhyun for three months?
Content: AU, heavily Greek mythology, enemies to friends.
Warnings: Well, the story contains NSFW/Smut, please minors do not continue.
Note: This story will be four or five chapters if I will not change my mind in the meantime. It is inspired by my major; however, I do not have a complete knowledge on archaeology, I am a historian. If I will make a technical mistake, please let me know. I am willing to receive any kind of feedback; you are more than welcomed to drop a message.
Chapter One: UN Village
June, Incheon Airport
Along the curves of the hill
Rolling, rolling, rolling hills
As we climb thereâs a broken streetlight
When I see one, I turn off the lights under it
Baekhyun was nothing but ready for the excavation.
You were more than ready for the session.
Both of you, were nothing but two leaders who hated each other equally.
You were eyeing each other with saying no words since your teams came together in the airport. Before this particular moment of departure, you refused to meet with Byun Baekhyun, putting aside meeting with him, you refused even dropping an e-mail in order to let Sunkyungwan Team about Sejong Team. You were clear and strict as fuck, even though two teams had to work together for three months, you had zero intention to get accustomed with the other team leader.
The weather was sunny, nice and warm, however because of you and Baekhyun, your team members were feeling like they were trapped in a fucking blizzard during the coldest winter.
You were aware of your team members had positive opinions of that scoundrel, especially the girls, as you had your first-handed experiences because of your stupid classmates, Byun Baekhyun was very famous of his abilities to cast a spell on women. The problem was he was also famous as a serial dater, serial killer type of men.
A bastard, nothing more nothing less.
âIndy,â one of your team members, Minseok, called you. Although, calling you as Indy was also a habit of Minseok, it was also an obligation for the others, you insisted on calling you by your nickname or your name, instead of calling you as sunbae. You did not like the hierarchical titles. âShould we move into the control point?â
âYeah, if you are ready.â you replied, grabbing your luggage and the rest.
âI guess we have to alert Sunkyungwan people since we will fly together.â Hyesun pointed out, your eyebrows knitted.
âI guess,â you recall her words. âThey also have this information, so we do not have to alert anyone, we are not their babysitters.â
Hyesunâs cheeks were blushing after you kindly scolded her, but she was clever enough to hold her tongue. Your dislike towards Sunkyungwan was not a secret as you used every opportunity to show it. You led your team to the kiosks, counting the heads automatically. You had six here, you were going to have ten more when you arrive to Chios whose coming from all around European universities. With thirteen Sunkyungwan students, the excavation was going to shelter almost forty members. It was going to be massive, you had to admit. You never had more than twenty students in the field till now, but you were going to lead an extraordinary team as Junmyeon craved into your brainâs folds with his hammer of words.
You wished to be with Junmyeon right now, you were more tense than usual. Junmyeon could put you in more stable mood, however you even did not think to name him while the executives were asking your possible candidates. He would kill you merciless, you knew it very well.
Eh, at least you got Sehun, Junmyeonâs brother in your team, he had a lot of similarities with Junmyeon even though he could be noisier than anyone you know, however you accepted him as your dongsaeng, as his precious noona and role model, you also knew how to put him in an order. Then you had Minseok, the eternal field-partner of yours. He was older than you, although he was engaged in a Ph.D. programme in abroad, he willingly accepted your invitation. You had four seniors, Shinhye, Yixing, Jongdae and Hyesun.
To your dismay, two of the seniors who you really could want in your team, Chanyeol and Kyungsoo were in that bastardâs team. You were of the fact that they were immensely close to each other, but you wished to have them in your team as their abilities were precious.
Especially Doh Kyungsoo.
You missed that fucking bastard who preferred to be with Baekhyun.
Life, you inhaled. It was not going exactly in the way you could ask.
âOn your foot, soldiers.â you called your team around you. âDo you collect all the materials you will be in need of?â
âYeah.â Jongdae cutely pointed to his tiniest bag. âI am ready to excavate.â
âExactly you will need every tool you have.â Shinhye smacked her husbandâs shoulder. Yeah, you had a married couple in your team, although you were a year younger them, you always regarded yourself as their big sister, if not a mother. âYou are going to work too much, Dae. I have sleepless nights because of the burden on your shoulders.â
You could not help but burst into laughs after the look Jongdae gave to his wife. Those idiots, they were so lovely and instead of their endless scolding sessions, they were incredibly fond of each other.
Sometimes you wonder, how having your significant other by your side would be?
You slightly shook your head, quickly climbing out of this deep cliff.
âLetâs go!â you exclaimed, jumping to the air. âSejong is ready for the session!â
Baekhyun was watching you with a disgusted expression.
âMove on, Baekhyun.â Chanyeol pushed his body to forward. âWe will miss the flight, Goddamnit.â
âGive him couple of minutes.â Kyungsoo chuckled. âHe is fucking the girl with his eyes, frankly, he is doing it unapologetically.â
âWhich girl?â Chanyeolâs eyes widened. âDo you mean, that girl? You c-
âOf course, I am not.â Baekhyun interrupted Chanyeol, staring at Kyungsoo. âShe can go and fuck herself.â
âWell,â Kyungsoo stood up, placing his book into the bag. âI guess, you are going to be one to fuck her, but maybe I am wrong.â
âIn her dreams.â Baekhyun laughed. âIf she can manage to dream something like this, but I do not think so. That little freak can put even the nuns into a shame.â
âShe is beautiful to be honest.â Chanyeol said with no different intention but observing your features carefully. âOkey maybe not the hottest girl in the town, but she is pretty, and I heard she is very clever.â
âShe is.â Kyungsoo approved. âBut she kicked Baekhyunâs ass twice, so he cannot endure her presence.â
âShe never,â Baekhyun grunted lowly. âKick me or my proverbial parts!â
âDid someone talk about kicking some asses?â Jongin appeared out of nowhere. âI am in.â
âShut up, Jongin.â Baekhyun rolled his eyes. âLetâs pick the team.â
The smile on Kyungsooâs face irritated Baekhyun, he wanted to erase that fucking grin so bad, punching his face but Baekhyun had to hold his manners as the team leader. If they would be in their flat, he could already beat the shit out of Kyungsoo, at least he would try.
Baekhyun hated the fact that Kyungsoo had the exact past with you and him. Three of you entered the department together, instead Kyungsoo went to another university to pursue his master, in the end he testified every moment between you and Baekhyun.
Thatâs why he was smiling since he learned you were going to be the other team leader.
Baekhyun was aware of the close relationship between you and Kyungsoo, one of his best friends.
Quickly Baekhyun led his team to the control point, close to your team. He was avoiding from this step, however as the leader, presenting his fucking team to your team was his responsibility. When they arrived, he took a deep breath.
âGood morning to all.â his blood started to boil when you turned to him with a displeased face expression. Your eyebrows were knitted, your fucking lips formed as a thick line, your dislike was palpable and Baekhyun knew his own face was mirroring your feelings. âI hope you are fine, could you let me present my team to you?â
Baekhyun wanted nothing but cut the shit off.
âGood morning.â you answered between your teeth. Your voice sounded extremely creepy. âYeah, go for it.â
You do not make a favour to me, bloody woman, Baekhyun thought but he put all his efforts to control his words.
âMy name is Byun Baekhyun, I am going to lead Sunkyungwan Team this year.â he looked at your team members, quickly memorized their faces. âI really look forward to work with you, I wish a good session for us. They are my members, Park Chanyeol, Doh Kyungsoo, Kim Jongin, Kim Danbi, Lee Taemin, Lee Donghae, Kim Jonghyun, Kim Kibum, Lee Seungjo, Kang Seulgi, Im Yoona, Kim Taeyeon and Kwon Yuri.â
âYou are like a troop, huh?â one of your girls smiled after Baekhyun finished his presentation.
âMore or less.â Baekhyun smiled back to her. What a surprise to him was the transformation of your face. You warmly smiled to the members and bowed to each of them.
Baekhyun raised his left eyebrow, but he could not avert his eyes from your smiling face.
It was pleasant like a spring day and when you smile your eyes were shining.
âThank you.â he heard your voice. âMy team is not big as yours, Park Shinhye, Kim Jongdae, Zhang Yixing, Oh Sehun, Kim Minseok and Song Hyesun.â
âYou forget yourself.â Minseok slapped his forehead and rolled his eyes. âIndy is going to lead Sejong Team as she has been leading us for the last two years, you can put your faith on her, she is the greatest.â
âIndy?â Jongin repeated your nickname with a surprised face. âAre you foreigner?â
âDo I look like?â you laughed and prevented yourself from flinching his forehead. He was such a cute kid. âThatâs how my team call me.â
âAh.â Jongin blushed and you could not control yourself anymore.
âBut if you want, you can also call me as Indy.â you grinned like a Cheshire cat. âEverything must be equal for the teams since we are going to live together during a whole summer.â
âI would like to.â Jongin bowed to you.
âSo do we need to add sunbae when we call you?â Kyungsoo asked.
âHave you ever called me as a sunbae, Doh Kyungsoo?â you coldly replied. âDid Sunkyungwan change your behaviours?â
âGardens of roses turn to garths of thorns in a second.â Kyungsoo murmured but he was smiling to you, then he opened his arms, catching you off guard because you knew that Kyungsoo was not a huge fan of hugs. âWill you salute me as a good friend, or will I start calling you as sunbae?â
âShut the fuck up, Doh.â you inhaled, but actually you were happy to see your still-working-on friendship. You moved to hug him, he held you tightly and lifted you to the air, then turned around himself, made you laugh like a 5-year-old girl.
Baekhyun did not like what was happening before his eyes. Kyungsoo had to be with Baekhyun, not hugging you for his fucking dear life, or lifting and turning you around like you were very dear to him. He hated sharing his friends with you, he already lost Junmyeon, he wanted to keep Kyungsoo and Chanyeol to himself. You should be fucking away from them, they were Baekhyunâs and only Baekhyunâs friends.
And there was another fragile issue that Baekhyun had been keeping in the deepest point of his heart and mind, like the palace of Nyx in the darkest part of Tartarus. Extremely delicate, horrendous, and even atrocious.
Baekhyun was aware of a strange presence was lying down beneath his hatred, dislike and continuous loathe towards you, there was a layer of curiosity, something could feed different layers and causing an earthquake in his life. Baekhyun knew that you were his biggest rival, but you became his rival by your talents and intelligence. He knew this and this piece of realization doubled his hate towards you.
The funny part was the things he did not realize. Baekhyun was full of confidence, he was capable of performing even miracles, however he never perceive the fact that you were also a miracle.
âSo, what we are going to do?â Chanyeol asked to everyone with a huge, happy smile. Baekhyun fended himself off moaning, happy virus Chanyeol already sensed the chance of levitating the mood between the teams and playing along with it. âAre we boarding?â
âYeah, letâs go.â one of your boys, Sehun, came close to Chanyeol. Baekhyun and you immediately glared them, noticing the chemistry between these two. Both of you wished to keep the teams apart from each other in order to reduce the obliged interactions between the leaders, but it seemed not possible even from the beginning. Baekhyun was cursing between his lips, you were swearing at the executive board in your mind.
âIndy,â Shinhye whispered to you. âAre you okey? You look like wanting to kill one of us.â
âNot you.â you answered without thinking, then registered to your words. âIgnore me, Shinhye, I am a little bit tense right now.â
âWe got your back.â she blinked at you and held Jongdaeâs hand. âLetâs start the adventure!â
What an adventure, you thought but silently joined them. Kyungsoo also was walking next to you.
âWhy the heck you went to Sunkyungwan?â you spilled the bean. âI always believed you would stay in Sejong.â
âYeah, that was my intention.â Kyungsoo was plain as always. âHowever, Sunkyungwan gives me more opportunities to secure my career, Indy.â
âI know.â you had to admit. Sejong was not generous as Sunkyungwan. âSorry for my selfish words.â
âNo worries.â he beamed. âIt happens all the time, but I am really happy to work with you again.â
âOld but gold days, huh?â
âWell, it was not purely gold,â Kyungsoo followed the flows and ebbs. âDo you remember when we were almost expelled from the university?â
âIs there a way to forget those days?â you immediately took a look on Baekhyun. It was his fault, obviously. âWe were shitting in our pants instead of the one who put us in that situation.â
âCome on,â Kyungsoo chuckled. âIt was not only his fault, Indy, our hands were also crimson red.â
âLet me recall the memory, Doh,â you pinched his hand, he playfully pushed your fingers. âExcuse me if I am wrong, however that scumbag was the one who challenged you to confiscate the coin, because of your involvement into the incident, I had no choice but dragging your ass out of shit.â
âThey caught two of us in the crime field.â Kyungsoo burst into laughs. âProfessor Lee went ballistic and scolded us like we just killed a person cold heartedly.â
âAnd you could not see the reason behind it?â You were cutting Kyungsooâs body with your eyes. âIf someone tries to steal a coin from the excavation house during the session, I will kill them for sure. We were so lucky, the one who caught us was Professor Lee.â
âI heard you are strictest when it comes to excavation.â Kyungsoo assured you. âBut try to not kill us.â
âThe only one I am going to take down,â you shivered with the memory, Kyungsoo was already regretful to remind it to you. Well, maybe not so much because he wanted you and Baekhyun to realize the potential relationship you could have, and the easiest way in order to put you two in touch was making you angry. âThat bastard if he will behave like the old days. We are not children anymore.â
âHave you ever been a kid?â
âFuck off, Kyungsoo.â
âYou did not change even a bit, Indy.â Kyungsoo made his statement. Obviously, you were going to keep this to yourself, taking his silent approval made you were more than happy. âYou are still a pain in the ass.â
âAnd you are still a good boy.â you grinned, watching his lips formed around silent laughs. âSuch a cute puppy for me, let me see your wagging tail.â
âI am sorry to interrupt your flirting session,â Kyungsoo turned to Baekhyunâs deadpanned face. âHowever, we have to move.â
âWhen you come across to a pretty girl,â Kyungsoo did not miss the chance of returning the favour. âYou have to flirt with her. Wasnât it your advice?â
âYeah.â Baekhyun looked at you, then turned to Kyungsoo.
You knew what was going to happen.
âHe said pretty girls,â you tucked the words in Baekhyunâs mouth before he could open his fucking damn mouth. âTo my dismay, I have never been pretty to correspond the standards of Byun Baekhyun the Magnificent. I am crying for the lack of beauty almost every night, I mean living without Byun Baekhyunâs interests⊠Such a misery.â
Kyungsoo bit his lower lip in order to hold his laugh, Baekhyunâs fists were clenching but you did not stop there.
"Ah I almost forget to ask for the name of that little village, Baekhyun.â you directly looked at his eyes since ages. âWhere the girl you desperately wanted to bless with your attention left you? UN Village?â
You immediately spin on your tiptoes, then slipped towards to Sehun, leaving two of them behind of you, refusing to look at back. In the meantime, Baekhyun was throwing daggers to your back, grinding his teeth, his jaw was extremely tensed. Before Kyungsoo could stop him, he swiftly came to your side, you felt his breath on your neck.
You shivered.
You fucking shivered and Baekhyun noticed that.
âYou are playing with the fire, as always.â he whispered to your ear before someone could notice what he was doing. âDid you forget who was burning with fire, baby girl?â
He quickly disappeared and started to make such a fuss in order to gather his team members around himself. You were frozen, after years, you were frozen, you missed the little smile on the corner of Baekhyunâs mouth.
You were on the verge of screaming because of the frustration you had felt. You forced yourself to proceed, walked into the plane, helped your team in order to set their belongings and place into their seats, then you retreated your own seat. It was comfortable and you could easily snatch a blanket. Your wish became true, even quicker than you expected because Sehun, your wonderful Sehun, already brought a soft blanket for you. You smiled at him, actually forgiving him for building bonds with Chanyeol since they changed their seats in order to sit next to each other and weaved your legs around the fabric.
Your brain was in autopilot, you were lost in the horrible memories. You did not want to recall them, you buried them into the cemetery of your memory. You wished nothing but never remember that day.
The day in that village.
Baekhyun was mad at himself.
His face was clouded, for the first time he was silent and sitting on the farthest seat in the plane. He really wanted to be alone, and since being vocal about his feeling was so natural for him, he told his need to the team. They willingly let him to do what he wanted, as a result, he was looking out of window, hell if a person could see something out of a planeâs window, and he was cursing himself.
He knew it was going to be a chess play. Between you and him.
It has been always like the chess.
There was a bond between you and Baekhyun, even thought you two always refused it, you also were aware of that bond. You equally hated each other and if there was a thing which could make you happier than seeing each otherâs downfalls, that was the opportunity of being the one who digs the otherâs grave by their hands.
He was sure on he was going to be the one who sets your body on fire, then finishes you. He was sure on he was going to be the victor, the one and only champion.
When he kills you, erases your name for all eternity, when he condemns you with demnatio memoriae, he will calmly breathe again.
You were a pain in the ass, even when you were not around of Baekhyun, you had a place in his mind since that fucking day he met you. Your presence was like a tree, how much he could try, he could neither find your roots in his mind nor cut them all.
You were his enemy; he was going to treat you as you deserved.
There would be no turning back.
ButâŠ
He was mad at himself.
He made a wrong move while he was trying to disturb you, shake your cage in order to give you a lesson.
He also remembered.
The day in that fucking village.
#baekhyun angst#baekhyun fluff#baekhyun x reader#baekhyun smut#baekhyun fanfic#exo baekhyun#baekhyun#byun bacon#byun baekhyun#exo series#exo fanfiction#exo x reader#exo smut#exo fanfic#exo imagines#exo angst#exo fluff#exo#baekhyun fic
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How would the mercs react to 'you are the father'? Which one would cry while holding their baby for the first time? WHERE ARE THEY!...oh, sorry. Wrong fandom on that last one...
mercenaries | holding their kid for the first time
Scout
"Me? A pa?"
He's frightened. He's excited, but he's frightened. He grew up with only a mother, how the fuck does he become a father? He silently curses whoever his father is for putting him in this kind of situation, but also thanks him for giving him the opportunity to not fuck up like he did. Scout springs back up again, a determined grin on his face as he holds his kid. This was his kid. A mini him. Scout as much as possible tries to block out any insecurity and tries to see the good side of things. Though every now and then, he'll need constant reassuring.
"Imma spoil him rotten. Ya think he'll like chicken for breakfast?"Â (son is literally a few minutes old without any teeth)
Soldier
He has such a gentle look on his face it'd be hard to tell if this man was Soldier or not without his helmet. For once, he fathers up and takes the news like a champ. He isn't scared, this is his kid. His little.. part of him. The information is still processing in his head, but you can tell he's struggling to get the right words out. He tries to give a decent reaction. This isn't the war, this isn't the battle back in Teufort, this is his fucking child. He already has a whole future planned out in his head for what he wants to do with his kid. He's ecstatic, and he's looking forward to all of this.Â
"You and me, son. I'll make you proud."
Pyro
It's a MINI PYRO! It's obvious they're struggling to keep their giddiness in, with shaky hands they cradle their kid, eyes sparkling with joy. They take a moment to admire all this. Their own kid, alive and healthy, pure and innocent. Pyro treated them like they were the most fragile thing on earth and momma hen instinct took over.
"Um, excuse me, we still need to run some tests." The doctor stood by the door, watching the firebug cradle their kid in the far corner of the room. Pyro just shook their head.
Demoman
Demo's in silent shock, a look of pure adoration in his face. This was his kid. *His* kid. There's a gentle smile on his face as he pokes the kid's cheek. Okay, this wasn't a dream. He's doting on his kid so much it's unbelievable. He nudges their cheek with the curve of his finger, tickling their nose, anything. He still can't believe this is happening. He doesn't have the heart to let go of the kid when the doctors come in to check on them.
"Just check 'im while I'm holding 'im. Och, is that so much of a problem?"
Heavy
He's mommy. Let him be. He's overjoyed to be holding his kid, he needs to be scolded sometimes to keep it down. It's surprising to see Heavy like this; the usually stoic man doting over his kid like there was no tomorrow. Can't stop with the nicknames, might have forgotten their real name because of it who knows
"ĐŒĐ”ĐŽĐČĐ”Đ¶ĐŸĐœĐŸĐș.. you are so small. You fit like egg in hand."
"Heavy, da fuck did you just say?"
EngineerÂ
Engineer is speechless. What? Him? A father? Holy shit. He thought that maybe his experiences with being a total father figure to the team would help him out, but boy was he wrong. The moment he held his baby, he realized that taking care of a baby would be very very very different from taking care of eight grown men. He can't hit them with a wrench or send them into respawn. This was a FUCKING BABY. He's nervous when he holds his kid, but once his kid let out their first giggle or laugh, Engineer was laughing along for whatever reason, hell bent on making them laugh again. That was a very cute noise. Do it again.
"Hell.. I can't believe this. You're.. adorable. Got that from your father, didn'tcha? Heh. Just kidding. Or am I?"
He's a freakin dork
Sniper
W-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-what? He was mentally preparing for this moment the past nine months, and all his training went crashing down the moment he held his kid. He was shaken up, this was his kid. Was this even okay? Was being an assassin and a father a good idea? Definitely not, but the way his kid grabbed his pinkie stole his heart, and he was determined to keep his little roo safe. This man is fucking territorial, not even his partner could hold the kid for the first few hours.Â
"Mundy, c'mon, give-"
"Piss off." He says, a dangerous edge to his voice as he pats his kid's back, trying to get them to burp. He would have been taken seriously if not for the adorable scene he was making.
Medic
The reality of him being a father doesn't hit him until later, when he's back in his own sleeping quarters. In the hospital, he's professional, checking on the kid to see if they're healthy. He gives the check-up, even does the delivery, if adopted, he did all the paperwork. He did everything he needed to do as a doctor. But as a father? It dawned on him in the middle of the night, when he heard his baby cry. Like an automated response, he got up, carried the baby until they calmed down. Then it hit him. When did he ever learn to do this? From nurturing baby baboons probably? It came to him so naturally it was surprising, pleasantly surprising.
"Mein gott.. this is veird. Babies are so fragile.."
Spy
Sadly, he misses his baby's delivery. He spent the entire night and morning on the roof, finishing his pack of cigars. He was stressed. Very. He had his car keys in one hand, contemplating whether or not he should just drive off and forget this ever happened. But he didn't. After a couple of years with Scout back in the base, he's learned his mistake, and he still regrets it to this day. He's been wishing for a chance to redeem himself, now he has it. He returns to the hospital room, apologizing for his delay. When he sees the baby, he's stricken with fear. What does he do? Without being given another second to decide, he's given the baby, and he's never felt genuine fear before, but staring at the baby really got him thinking hard. The baby's eyes, they were exactly like his. The baby's hair even even looked like his. All of this was so shocking to Spy. He couldn't help but stare at the baby- his baby- the whole time. The scene itself was adorable. Spy holding and staring at a baby with eyes full of adoration for 9823487 hours.
"This.. this is mine?"
"Yes, Spy, and can you not talk about the baby like he's a thing?"
#team fortress 2#tf2#tf2 x reader#team fortress 2 x reader#tf2 scout#tf2 soldier#tf2 pyro#tf2 engineer#tf2 engie#tf2 demo#tf2 demoman#tf2 heavy#tf2 spy#tf2 sniper#tf2 medic#team fortress#tf2 hc#tf2 hcs#tf2 headcanons
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I know this is mostly a venti blog but will you write for albedo again? would love to see more of him with your writing.. oh also I hope this doesn't come off as pushy haha I was just wondering
I did made a snippet of another albedo x reader and the draft is sitting here for months now ajskks
It has 1.7k words and albedo still hasnt appeared yet orz so uhm, here ya go even tho its not yet finished im sorryy
This looks like aether x reader at the start
       The soft clouds of Mondstadt were a wonderful sight to see. Hues of white and blues scattered across the horizon, making it seem like a smudge of a paintbrush, beautifully painted on the canvas.Â
       You were wandering at the town square of Mond, mindlessly checking the shops that will ever catch your interest. You passed by Marjorieâs souvenir shop, boring. Checking Timaeusâs alchemy, yeah youâve already learned a lot, no need to go back there.Â
       Unfortunately, there was none at all.
       A tired sigh slipped from your lips and furrowed your brows. There was nothing to do and youâve already done all your tasks. Klee was still stuck in her confinement, so you canât play with her today.
       What a bummerâŠ
       Another sigh came and your stomach released a sound hungry grumbling. You squirmed and wrapped your arms around your waist to silence the noise. Walking around the town made you starve for sure.Â
       You noticed a lot of people have been crowding at Saraâs restaurant. Was there an event or something? You shrugged your shoulders to brush those thoughts off, more focused on getting food than the commotion that is happening in front of you.
       âExcuse meââ
       âPlease, traveler!! Iâll give you a meal for free!â
       Your brows raised in surprise seeing the Honorary Knight was here. âOoh, free meal?! Traveler, say yes! Say yes!!â His floating companion, Paimon, exclaimed whilst floating around and wiggled her little legs in excitement. âF-fine⊠we canât say no to a free food.â
       Aether placed his hand on his hair and ruffled it with a sigh of defeat. From the corner of his eyes, he saw you waving at him.
      â[Name]!â You approached them and gave a big grin. âHey! Didnât know youâre already back here in Mondstadt.â
       He chuckled and rubbed his neck sheepishly. âYeah, we just recently arrived.â Before you could respond, Sara called out your name. â[Name]! Perfect timing, I also need your help.âÂ
       You tipped your head and hummed. âSure. Is it another delivery?â The waitress shook her head and jutted her thumb behind her. âLots of customers are coming and we need you two to give these orders on their table.â
       Your eye twitched and squinted at her in wariness. âI donât mind but please donât tell me I still have to wear that uniform.âÂ
       âEven though itâs a must, there's no need to. There's not enough time to change. Just give these meals to their respective tables.â She clasped her hands in front in a begging manner. Breathing in relief, you went to the counter to take the plates and set off to serve them.
       âYou owe me a free Flaming Red Bolognese!â The outlander chuckled at your words and mimicked your action, ready to do the task.
       The duty actually went smoothly than you thought it would be. With Aether helping you out, it was fast and steady but with a few slips here and there. Just as you were already done, another pack of customers came rushing in.
       âWoah!! [Name] really is the waitress again in Good Hunter~!âÂ
       âHey! First come, first serve!! And no skipping lines!â
       You stopped in your tracks and slowly turned your head. This is bad. Really bad.
       Your throat bobbed seeing lots of customers gathering in the diner. Then you slapped both sides of your to shake off the nervousness. Paimon glanced at you and floated over. âWoah, lots of people came. Shouldnât you two handle it?â
       Aether seemed like he was about to pass out from exhaustion and hunger. âIâŠI just want something to eatâŠâ Head clouded and hazy, he unknowingly grabbed the emergency ration by her legs and opened his mouth ready to take a bite to get rid of his starvation. It surprised her as she wriggled out from his grasp and stomped her foot in the air.
       âGet a hold of yourself! Sticky Honey Roast is almost there waiting for you!â
       âHuh?! Says the one who just floats around and does nothing to help!â
      This is going to be a long day.
  â
        âGood work, everyone!â Sara clapped and wiped her head to remove the sweat that was slipping on the side of her head. The waitress then put out a meat dish coated with sweet honey sauce. The fragrant of the freshly cooked dish wafted through their noses making them drool.
       âFinally!!â Aether cried and took a big munch of Good Hunterâs beloved dish.Â
       âAnd hereâs your Flaming Red Bolognese, [Name]. Theyâre freshly cooked, so eat it while itâs still hot.â She winked and gave you a fork. You thanked Sara and twirled the spaghetti with your fork, letting its long noodles snake around it.
       âAh, by the way, I have another request for you.â You quirked a brow at her as you chew your food, signing her to continue. âA client asked me to prepare a banquet and since weâre currently low on staff, do you mind if you do the baking?â
       You grabbed a napkin and wiped the red stains on your lips. Her request made you raise a question though. Why you and not someone whoâs good at baking? Well, you can bake too but at an approaching proficiency level only.Â
       The first person who came to your mind was Noelle. She can do everything perfectly well with ease. However, she seems so busy lately, so asking her to do it will make you feel bad and you donât want to add another task to her hands.
       And the other one isâŠ
        I-I donât know anyone else who can bakeâŠ!Â
        You can also ask Aether but you donât want to trouble him any further especially since he just arrived here. You've already lost count of how many sighs escaped from you. Well, itâs better to help a friend whoâs in trouble than just leaving them there struggling.
       âSure, but why me?â You asked. Her lips curved and grinned at you as her eyes gleamed like the stars at night. âYour Moon Pie was so heavenly! When I took a bite of it, all the taste came to me at once. And the meringue was perfect! Not too sweet and not too bland.â
       âI would do anything to have another plate of itâŠâ She placed her hands on her cheeks as she whined, drooling just thinking about the said pastry.Â
       âSo what kind of pastries am I going to bake? I hope itâs not too many.â Sara propped her elbows on the counter and leaned forward. âJust a cake thatâs all.â She then waved her hand, motioning you to come closer.
       Aether looked at them who are whispering to each other. He saw your face turned beet red and before puffing up your cheeks and playfully slapping her arms. Whatever their chat was, he shouldnât bother wanting to know it.
       Food is here. Food is free, must eat it. Yes, only these thoughts must be inside his head. He continued relishing the delicious meal with Paimon across gnawing the plate clean.
  â
        âFlour, check. Eggs, check. Milk, check. Now all I need is⊠strawberries!â You were currently shopping for ingredients in Blancheâs shop. Your eyes scanned the racks, looking for a pack of that delicate pink fruit. With the continuous search for the red fruit up and down the shop, you're starting to lose hope at no signs of sight of that sweet berry.
       Did they run out of stock?
       You went towards the shop owner and asked. Sadly, she said yes, much to your dismay.Â
       âThere might be fresh strawberries in Springvale. You should ask there. Orââ Blanche suddenly smirked, making you feel unease about whatâs behind that mischievous smile of hers.
       âYou could ask Albedo to grow one for you. He can easily grow out those with just his alchemic powers or something.â Huh, it can be. You closed your eyes and give a thought about it.Â
       âAlbedo? I mean yeah, but heâs busy right now.â
       âEh? But heâs right behind you.â
       The mention of the said male standing behind you made you immediately whirled your head in excitement. You feel delighted knowing about it, but rather expecting to see his figure there, you see nothing. No one and not a thing was there. Only air greeted you.Â
       The shopkeeper snorted and covered her mouth to hold her laughter as small tears started to create from the edge of her eyes. You canât believe she just did that. You felt your cheeks heat up in embarrassment that Blanche just tricked you into thinking the Chief Alchemist was really there.
       âS-sorry sorry.â She said in between her giggles and shook her hand. You grumbled and took out a pouch of mora to pay for the ingredients and shoving it into her hands.
       âKeep the change.â
       And with that, you marched your way off to Springvale with your face still flushed. Blanche looked over to the waitress of Good Hunter and gave her a thumbs up with that impish grin still glued to her face.
i have to cut it off here since its not finished yet. Itâs just klee and reader are baking. idk what happened to my motivation in writing for albedo ;; but if you read the snippet you can get the whole idea of this oneshot
#anon ask#ellianswers#elliwrites#genshin impact x reader#genshin impact#genshin impact albedo x reader#albedo x reader#unfinished#albedo#genshin impact albedo
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Serendipity - Part I. (Harry Styles)
a/n: i am BEYOND excited to share this story with you guys! iâve been working on it for over a month now if not more and what started as just a oneshot, slowly grew into this massive fic. i really hope youâll love the story of Harry and Lis bc im obsessed with them haha. please feel free to share your thoughts and reactions about the chapter and the fic itself!
pairing: Harry x OC (Annalise Lloyd)
word count: 8k
SERIES MASTERPOST â«ïž my masterlist â«ïž  come and talk to me about Serendipity! â«ïž consider buying me a coffee!
Serendipity (n.) Finding something good without looking for it.
There are people who plot out their New Yearâs Eve plan even months before the last day of the year, making sure they will be celebrating the upcoming year at the best party possible. And then there are the folks who just ignore it until the very last moment and end up spending at a random place with even more random people.
Harry Styles desperately wanted to be the first kind, but unfortunately often found himself falling into the second case scenario. With his busy schedule and endless ocean of his upcoming projects, he never really had time to think about the last party of the day and usually ended up just tagging along some of his friends wherever they headed to. This year was no different, having to work up until even the last few days of the year, Harry had little to no thought about where he would be when the clock strikes midnight.
Just about a day before it, one of his old high school friends, Griff hits him up with a text if he would want to join them for the celebration at the pub he opened not that long ago. Harry didnât think twice to accept the invitation, finally checking one more thing off his list, so he wonât just stay at home, and pathetically fall asleep at ten.
Itâs nothing big or fancy, Griff assures him in the morning when he rings his friend up to ask when he should arrive and what he should bring.
âNothing, ey? Just come and âave a good time with us,â Griff tells him, though he already knows Harry wonât show up empty handed.
 December 31st
A little before seven Harry opts for a quick shower before he dives deep in his wardrobe to find something to wear. He is torn between wearing a fancy outfit or something cozier, but eventually stands up for the latter, putting on a pair of light washed jeans, a simple white button up and a seaweed green knitted jumper under his coat. He doesnât pay much attention to his hair, his curls falling around his head in a messy, warm brown halo. Itâs been raining all day, it wouldnât have had any use to try to tame them.
Slowly but surely, Harry feels the buzz in himself, excited to see his old friends and maybe meet some new people while having drinks and just relaxing. He grabs a bottle of fancy whiskey from his bar and heads out around eight.
Griff is one of the few people Harry stayed in touch with after his career launched so abruptly, the two of them often met up whenever Harry was around, having a pint together, just chatting up. Griff bought an old pub a few years prior and completely renewed it, opened at the beginning of the year, Harry was there at the opening party, he had way too much to drink, but he surely had a great time.
âThere he is! My favorite arrogant son of a bitch!â Harry immediately hears as soon as he steps into the pub thatâs already quite filled.
The tall lad makes his way through the groups of guests until he can envelop his old friend in a warm, brotherly hug as Harry chuckles at the name he just called him. Griff always loved that line from Harryâs song and never missed a chance to call him that. He doesnât mind though, keeps that playful side of their friendship he always adored so much.
âGood to see you, mate,â Harry smirks at him. âHere, this is for yeh.â He holds out the pricey drink and Griff shakes his head at him.
âTold ya not to bring anything!â he sighs but accepts the gift anyway, knowing well Harry would just sneak into the back anyway and leave the liquor on his desk. âWe âave a nice evening ahead of us. Got food, drinks, everythingâs on me, take what yeh want,â Griff assures him as the two of them walk further inside.
Harry sees a few familiar faces, high school friends, kids from around the neighborhood that are now grown adults, just like him, but there are quite a lot of guests he doesnât know.
âCâmon, yeh need tâ âave a welcome drink with me,â Griff grins as he pulls Harry to the bar and fills up two shot glasses generously. Harry doesnât even bother to ask him what it is, he just takes the glass willingly and after they clink in the middle they both send it down.
Harry grimaces as the hard liquor burns down his throat, Griff never played around with the soft drinks, he knows what hits the best and fastest and Harry figures itâs one of those drinks that would have him crawling on the floor after two more shots.
It doesnât take Harry long to mix and mingle, get into conversations and meet new people, just enjoying the welcoming and warm atmosphere of the party. He is pleased to see that people treat him just like any other guest, rather than a famous person and he is beyond thankful for that.
Near the bar, Griff has set up a quite rich buffet table filled with all kinds of snacks and food. Itâs way past ten when Harry shuffles over there feeling his stomach growling. He grabs a paper plate and his eyes roam everything thatâs set on the table. Humming to himself he decides to opt for the delicious looking fries, his mouth drools just at the sight of them, so he puts a generous amount to his plate before his eyes spot the bowl of peas. Thatâs exactly what he needs to go with the fries.
He goes a little overboard, but he couldnât care less. Once he is satisfied with his meal he puts back the spoon that was sat in the bowl of peas, right when someone reaches for it. Glancing up his gaze meets a pair of warm brown eyes and a shy, but playful smile. Harry canât stop himself from smiling instantly as the woman takes the spoon and fills her plate with peas. He looks down and sees that her plate is filled with the exact same things: fries and peas.
âExcellent choice,â he smirks teasingly and her eyes snap down to her plate before she sees the similarity on Harryâs plate. She lets out an airy chuckle before she tugs her chestnut colored, wavy locks behind her ears with her now free hand.
âMother always told me to balance the junk out with something healthy,â she admits, the corners of her mouth curling up as she blinks a little shy under Harryâs burning gaze.
He always knew he had an eye for pretty things and he never dared to deny himself from admiring them once he laid his eyes on something he found breathtaking. She was by far the prettiest thing he has seen in quite some time, so he doesnât shy away from taking in her figure in front of him. Delicious looking curves dressed in a pair of tight jeans and a sheer shirt with a top underneath it, the front tugged into the waist of the jeans. Her hair looks effortless, but he can tell she probably spent some time forming the natural looking waves before coming here. The thin eyeliner makes her eyes appear more cat-like and her long lashes dance around with each look she pays him.
âYou want toâum, sit?â she stammers nodding towards an empty table near the buffet, a soft blush tainting her soft skin. Harry absolutely adores the hint of innocence in her features.
ââfcourse,â he nods and follows her.
The two of them move over to the table and sit down with their meal, Harry sneaking a fry into his mouth right away.
ââM Harry, by the way,â he says, realizing he hasnât even introduced himself just yet. Some people tend to look at him weird whenever he does it, as if it should be common knowledge to know who he is, but he never takes it for granted. Luckily, she doesnât find it funny or weird that he introduced himself.
âAnnalise. But everyone just calls me Lis,â she explains and holds out a hand for him, which at first looks a little odd and he can tell she regrets the motion, but he appreciates it, even finds it cute. So before she can pull her hand back he takes it and gives it a soft shake. âSo what brings you here tonight?â she asks as both of them digs into their food.
âGriff invited me, saved me last minute, didnât have any plans.â
âHow do you know him?â
Harry finds it amusing that she didnât bring up that a famous person like him would probably have tons of invitations to fancy parties. He hates when people assume that his social life is blossoming at all times, packed with parties and events to attend every day.
âWe went to high school together. Stayed in touch through the years.â
Lis nods with a small smile before her eyes return to the plate in front of her.
âHow âbout you?â
âOh, um⊠Well, Griff and I had a blind date like ages ago, but we both figured out pretty quickly we are never gonna be more than just friends. But that we are perfect for. Have been meeting up every once in a while. I was kind of in the same shoe like you, wasnât planning on coming out tonight, but⊠I was forced to,â she admits with a nervous chuckle.
âYâ donât like to go out?â
âIâuh, donât really have the time,â she answers, clearly a bit nervous at the topic so Harry decides to just drop it.
The two of them sit there, just talking and eating and with each passing moment Harry finds himself more and more enchanted by the woman sitting on his right. The way she rambles sometimes, how her nose scrunches whenever she is laughing hard, how she likes to keep tugging her hair behind her ears all the time, are the smallest things but they easily catch Harryâs attention.
Besides, she is not just the looks, also an amazing company. Easy to talk about anything, even the riskier things too. She doesnât shy away from giving her honest and raw opinion, but also doesnât attack if someone thinks differently. Instead, she is open to other point of views, seeking opportunities to learn and grow. Itâs a mindset Harry values highly and feels like itâs hard to find it. But on this evening in his mateâs pub, he found a gem, it feels like.
The plates soon get swapped to beers and Lis is getting giddier with each gulp, which he finds amusing, especially because she lets her thoughts slip without thinking about them and it allows Harry to look into that pretty head of hers easier.
He doesnât fail to notice how his heart flutters every time she touches his arm or hand whenever she is deep in a story. The warm touch of her soft hand is sending him into trembling and he is glad they are sitting because he surely would be having a hard time keeping himself up on his feet. She is just the kind of person that wraps others around her fingers without even trying or noticing.
Though itâs only been over an hour since he first laid his eyes on her, he feels like he has known her for ages. The connection built up fast and smoothly, sweeping Harry right off his feet. Heâs got it bad for her and he already knows he wants to see her again once this night ends.
âOh, itâs almost midnight!â Annalise gasps snapping out of her thoughts, a hand snapping to Harryâs upper arm. The crowd is starting to buzz, getting ready for the count down.
âCâmon, letâs get some champagne,â Harry tells her and helps her up from her seat.
They head to the bar and each of them grabs a flute filled with the sparkly alcohol. They stand a little to the side, but still mingled in the crowd of guests. Harry can feel his hands getting sweaty as he thinks about the countdown. Every fiber in his body is aching to kiss her, even though he knows itâs quite crazy knowing the fact they have known each other for only two hours. But he just canât help it, she has a spell on him with just one look, making him act like a teenager in love.
Annalise peeks up at Harry with a lazy smile, the drinks have made her a little lightheaded, but she is nowhere near being drunk. Her thoughts are absolutely clear and they all focus on the man standing close to her.
Harry watches her bite into her bottom lip and he wonders if she is thinking about the same thing. If sheâd be mad if he kissed her when the clock strikes midnight or slap him right across his face. He notices as she draws a deep breath, eyes looking around before they return to him.
âGet yoâ drinks, lads!â Griff shouts from somewhere behind the bar and those who havenât picked up a glass quickly work on the problem.
Then the countdown begins.
âTen!... Nine!... Eight!...â
Annalise glances up at Harry and her cheeks blush when she catches him already looking at her. She wishes she had her beer so she could hide in her glass from his burning eyes.
âSeven!... Six!...â
Harry turns so his whole body is facing her and takes just one tiny step towards her. When she doesnât back away from him, he takes it as a sign that she might want the same thing as him.
âFive!... Four!...â
She looks straight up at him with a sheepish smile and pushes herself against him right when his free hand finds its way to her waist. She sucks in a sharp breath, but doesnât move while Harry is aching to taste her plump, soft lips.
âThree!... Two!... One!... Happy New Year!â
The crowd cheers as one, guests are clapping and screaming, welcoming the new year with high hopes and full of planes for the new chapter that just started.
Harry and Annalise lock eyes and while everything around them is a full chaos, he feels like a bubble of silence and tranquility is surrounding them. Harry sucks in his breath, lips parted as he doesnât break his gaze with hers. Thereâs a moment of hesitation, but the voice in the back of his mind tells him that he canât let this moment go to waste.
Fuck it! He tells himself before he leans down and his lips meet hers in a soft, warm and breathtaking kiss.
He is a man who believes in magic, in things he canât explain rationally, he is a man who doesnât try to pull reality into everything when something odd happens. When his lips meet hers, he is swept right off his feet with just that tiny touch. Itâs not a demanding kiss, very restricted and shy, but it still makes his insides tremble for her, almost falling to his knees right in front of her.
Thereâs a moment of hesitation from her side, when their lips are just touching in a little awkward way, but it fades into nothing before Harry could wrap his head around it, her lips parting as she lets him deepen the kiss, a soft moan slipping out of her throat that brings a knot to his stomach.
The moment is so vivid, raw and intoxicating, he wishes he could bottle it up and open it to have a taste of her anytime later, keep her in his pocket just to have her lips glued to his like this whenever he needs to be grounded or taken away from the world. His fingers dig into her waist, pulling her close to his body, hoping to just merge into her, become one with the woman in his arms.
She softly glides her hands up his arms, through his shoulders before they stop at the back of his neck, digging into his soft curls, while never breaking the kiss. Their lips stay melted together, tongues and teeth clashing, they are a hot mess in the first minutes of the new year.
The cheering slowly dies down and the usual buzzing of conversations and laughter replaces it, but the two of them are still busy with each other and it takes quite some time to pull themselves out of the bubble they created.
âHappy New Year, Lis,â Harry smiles down, lips swollen, eyes glistening from the joy thatâs filling up his veins. She glances up at him shyly from under her lashes.
ïżœïżœïżœHappy New Year, Harry,â she whispers, biting into her bottom lip, coming off the high this little make out session gave her. Â
One hour passes by, then another and the party is starting to slowly die down. People are flaking out the door, the crowd is getting smaller with each door opening.
Harry and Annalise remain in the corner of the place after their kiss, a barrier thatâs been noticeably present before has come down as Harry has his arm swung over the back of her chair and she lets herself lean against his side. Thereâs something so calming and tranquil in just being so close to each other, sharing thoughts and stories while his fingers graze on her shoulder gently and her head always falls to his shoulder when she laughs on something. He loves her laugh, it could easily light up any place and Harry canât help but feel sorry for the people who donât see her shine. So many guests didnât get the chance to get to know her, but on the other hand, he is a bit selfish, he wants her all to himself. No one else should have the honor of making her laugh or bringing a smile to her perfect lips. He wants her all to himself, even if it makes him sound like a mad man.
After she leaves to the restroom, she comes back with her phone in her hands and a tired smile playing on her lips.
âI, uhhâcalled an Uber. I really should get going,â she tells him and he wants to make her stay. He wants this evening to last forever, but he canât ask her to stay longer than she wants, so he just slowly nods.
âIâll walk you out,â he offers, but itâs more like a fact.
The two of them find their coats on the packed rack, Annalise says goodbye to the handful of people she knows, hugging Griff before they head outside to wait for her car to arrive.
âI really enjoyed tonight,â Harry mumbles, shoving his hands into his coatâs pockets, feeling like a nervous teenage boy talking to his crush. She glances up at him with a smile, but thereâs something clouding her eyes he canât really put his finger on.
âMe too,â she assures him, a pair of headlights turning the corner and they both look in the approaching carâs direction before facing each other. âIt was really great meeting you, Harry. Take care of yourself in the new year,â she tells her, but he doesnât like the weight of her words. It sounds like a proper goodbye, like she is bracing herself to never meet him again, but he canât let that happen.
âCan IâUh, can I have your number? I would love to take you out sometime.â
The car stops next to them and she nods in the driverâs way to let him know sheâs the one he is supposed to pick up. Taking a step to the backseat, she looks back at Harry.
âIâm really sorry, Harry, but we canât.â
Devastation washes over him, her words are like a punch into his stomach each. Why is she rejecting him? Did she not enjoy the evening? Did he say something stupid? She seemed to be having a great time, so why canât he see her again?
âWhat? Are you sure? Because I really loved tonight and would love to see you again.â
Annalise opens the car door and shoots him an apologetic look. He has never felt this helpless in his life, than at that moment, looking at the woman of his dreams escape from his reach.
âIâm sorry, but I canât get into⊠whatever it is you want from me. I really am sorry, I wish it was different.â
âBut I just want to see you again. I thought⊠You didnât feel like it was something special?â he breathes out, feeling the world crashing down on him with each passing moment.
âI did, but I canât do this. Iâm sorry. Take care, Harry,â she sighs, clearly not happy about her own actions and he doesnât understand why she is fleeing away like this.
He stands there, completely frozen as she gets into the car and shuts the door open. Their eyes meet through the window one last time before the car starts moving and she falls out of his view. He stares after her until the very last moment, when the car disappears at the end of the street, leaving him in pieces from the major rejection he just suffered.
He stays out there until his nose and cheeks turn red and his ears are freezing off, part of him wishing that if he just waits sheâs gonna magically reappear and tell him it was just a joke. He canât believe he met such a wonderful creature and had to let her go like she didnât flip his whole world upside down under just a couple of hours. Does she know how much of an effect she had on him?
She probably doesnât, he thinks to herself, because then she wouldnât have left so abruptly and without a trace for him to find her again.
When Harry returns to the pub, he is met with a tipsy Griff, shoving a pint into his hand immediately.
âAy, saw you hanging with Lis all night!â he teases Harry, but the mentioning of her name just makes his heart ache. However, knowing that Griff is friends with her, he is ready to use him as a way to get to her.
âYeah, hey, you have her number?â he asks, trying his best to look as innocent as possible, but Griff sees right through him, even with all the alcohol in his body.
âSorry, mate. Fâshe didnât give it to ya, I wonât go against her.â
âIâm begging you, Griff. I need to see her again!â he sighs in despair, ready to do anything he can to get to her.
âYânot the first bloke to fall for her magic. I know what it feels like, but I canât do anything, sorry.â He shrugs his shoulders, giving an apologetic look to his friend before he joins another conversation.
Harry could scream from the frustration, the urge to punch something or someone is growing with each passing moment, but he has to realize thereâs nothing he can do at this point other than accept the fact that he met this wonderful woman, had the best night with her and then was forced to watch her walk out of his life before she could even become part of it properly.
Harry starts to realize that what he thought about heartbreaks is nothing compared to the feeling Annalise left in his heavy heart.
There has to be a solid reason for what she did. Or did not do.
Endless theories about Annalise flood his mind through the days following that night when he was forced to watch her leave on such a bitter and painful note. Harry couldnât stop himself from making up the most ridiculous cases just to give himself a possible peace of mind, but neither of them brought him enough comfort to forget about her.
His best shot was that she had a boyfriend, or even worse, a husband. This was the only version that sounded somewhat real and believable, though he just knew she is not the type of woman to cheat on a significant other.
How would you know? You spent just one evening with her, she could be a serial killer for all you know! Harryâs rational side was always quick to shut him down when his thought swirled around the idea of knowing her well enough to assume anything about her.
As the days dragged by him in a painful pace, he slowly had to realize itâs going to be a question in his life heâll never get an answer to, so he just has to learn to live with the thought of the woman that got away.
The end of January rolls around faster than he could comprehend, February comes and he finds himself spending his days mostly in the studio, cooking up new music. Studio sessions are his favorite. Thatâs his element, he feels safe and comfortable, surrounded by people he trusts and enjoys creating his art fully. In the new year, he has also been eager to pick up a new hobby so he has been trying himself out in knitting and painting recently, finding both of them just a tad bit too hard for him just yet, but they were enough to get his mind off of the one woman who was constantly occupying his thoughts following New Yearâs Eve.
Sitting in an armchair in the studio, he and his bandmates are listening back to some recordings they did today and he is trying to find that one thing that keeps throwing him off whenever he hears the song.
âI think itâs great,â Mitch states once the recording ends, and Harry agrees, it is great, but not the best.
âMaybe we could tone down the keyboard a little through the bridge, give more space for the guitar,â he contemplates, but really, he is just shooting in the dark, not sure what it is that keeps him on edge about the song.
âWhy donât we have a break?â Sarah suggests with a warm smile, seeing how everyone is keen on leaving for a little, except Harry, who is still fixated on mastering the song. But he agrees to have the break, however while everyone gets ready to leave and grab something to eat from the diner thatâs around the corner, Harry stays where he is, eyes glued to his notebook.
âYouâre not coming?â Charlotte asks him and he just shakes his head.
âNo, not that hungry.â He looks up and shoots them a short smile and though they all can tell he could use the time out, they know him enough already that he wonât leave before he finds whatâs not right.
âAlright. Weâll be back in an hour,â Mitch informs him and he dismisses them all with a nod.
He stays right there, going through the lyrics a few more times, making tiny changes in hopes that itâll fix it all, but he can feel himself growing frustrated. Doesnât matter how hard he is trying, he realizes his brain needs a break. Letting out a defeated huff he leans back, looking around in the empty studio. He doesnât feel particularly hungry, but he could use something to snack on. So grabbing his coat he locks up the studio and heads out to the nearby Tesco they usually run out during sessions.
He is still humming the melody to himself when he walks in, a pair of sunglasses sitting on the bridge of his nose, his famous curls hidden under a green beanie. He doesnât bother to get a cart or basket, just strolls inside and roams down the aisles, trying to decide what he desires.
He settles on some kind of canned tea and a protein bar, but before he heads towards the cash registers, he wanders down the aisle where they keep cereals, looking around aimlessly. Itâs the middle of the day on a weekday, most people are at work at this hour, so just a few other customers are lingering around, filling their carts. At first, he doesnât pay any attention to the figure a little further down the aisle, his eyes are glued to the shelves, but then he just mindlessly glances to his left, his brain not even processing what, or who he is seeing at first. Then he takes a double take and his stomach drops to the tiled floor when he recognizes the woman, deep in her thoughts to decide which cereal to buy.
Annalise is standing just a few meters away from him, looking just as beautiful as he remembered, wearing a pair of simple jeans, light blue sneakers and a white jacket, her hair is in a loose ponytail on the top of her head.
âLis?â he calls out, as if he thinks she is just a ghost. Taking a few steps closer he watches as her eyes fall from the products on the shelves to him, then they widen and her lips part in shock.
âHarry? Wha-what are you doing here?â she asks and Harry is quick to read the panic out of her tone as she looks around cautiously.
âIâm⊠shopping?â he answers with a soft chuckle, holding up the items in his hands.
âHavenât seen you around here.â
âThe studio we use is nearby, I drop by sometimes. But today is clearly my lucky day.â Even though her reaction is giving him doubts, he canât hide his joy upon seeing her again, fate clearly playing on his side this time.
âUh, yeah?â she lets out an anxious chuckle, her eyes often wandering off him, as if she is waiting for someone to show up and it just fuels Harryâs rich theories about her.
âSo, are you here with your boyfriend?â he boldly asks, deciding to just go for it. Annaliseâs eyes widen once again, but not in a way that makes him think he just busted her, itâs more of a confused one.
âBoyfriend? What are you talking about?â
âWell, you basically ran away from me that night, I figured you had someone and thatâs why you didnât want to give me your number.â He tries his best not to sound petty or bitter, though thatâs exactly what heâs been feeling ever since she left that night.
âHarry, thatâs⊠not the case.â
âOkay, so does this mean youâll give me your number this time?â he tries and he is so busy with her presence, he doesnât even notice when a smaller frame runs past him down the aisle.
âMommy! I want this!â
At first, he doesnât even register that the little boy is talking to Annalise, he dismisses his presence, eyes still fixated on her, but then her gaze leaves him and turns down to the boy, holding up a bar of chocolate.
âHoney, thatâs too big. Choose something smaller, alright?â
It takes Harry a few moments to put one and one together. This kid just ran up to her, called her mommy and most likely not on accident since she answered him, very much talking to him like his mother. Though Harry canât see his own face, he knows it fell, shock completely taking over him as his thoughts finally add up. Annalise looks back at him in panic, completely puzzled about what to do or say.
âBenji, go get another one, a smaller one while I talk to my friend here,â Annalise softly tells the boy.
He turns to Harry, eyes meeting his as he cocks his head to the side, examining the shocked adult standing in front of him.
âWhoâs this?â he blurts out.
âJust a friend, alright? Go get your chocolate,â she urges. Benji gives Harry another look before nodding and running off, leaving them alone once again in the cereal aisle. âHarry, I-Iâm sorry, you werenât supposed to know.â
âAre you married?â is his first question, taking her by surprise.
âWhat?â
âThe father. Is he your husband?â he urges, eager to clear the picture. Annalise shakes her head.
âNo, we were never even married.â
He feels relief washing over him. At least at this point he doesnât feel like a homewrecker. If he found out she wasnât only a mother but also married, and that she cheated on the dude with him, that would have crushed him. But itâs one less thing to worry about on a long list.
âOkay, itâs fine. You are not married, itâs all good,â he breathes out and it brings her a smile through this absurd situation.
âYou thought I was married?â
âOr at least had a boyfriend, yeah,â he nods, hands on his hips as he licks his lips. He surely had a mini panic attack, but he can feel the life coming back into his body.
âDo I come off like the kind to cheat that easily?â she asks with raised eyebrows, but she didnât take it as an offense, she more like finds it funny rather than hurtful.
âNo, not at all! I was just trying to figure out why you rejected me and this was my best shot!â
âIâm sorry, Harry. I just⊠I didnât know how to tell and I didnât really think you would want to see me again after that night.â
âI think I made it clear that I wanted to when I asked for your number.â
âWell, yes, but I thought you just wanted a hookup and thatâs just not what I can do.â
âBecause ofâŠâ he gestures towards the boy that jolted down the aisle just a few minutes ago.
âBecause of Benji, yeah.â
âAlright, itâs understandable, but I did not just want a hookup, and thatâs still not what I want,â he clears, his words certainly surprising her. This is definitely not what she was expecting when she came down to get groceries today.
âHarryâŠâ she breathes out, already feeling guilty that she is about to turn him down once again. âYou canât be serious.â
âWhy not?â
âBecause Iâm a single mother with a six year-old and you are⊠you.â
âI donât see your point,â he truthfully answers.
âIâm not some model you chatted up at some award show, who is living her best life, traveling the world just like you. My days consist of work, doing laundry, cleaning the house, cooking, doing first grade homework, going to football practice and watching cartoons. We are polar opposites.â
âNo, just our lifestyles, but that doesnât mean we canât get closer.â
âIs that really what you want?â
Harry is about to answer right when Benji emerges again, proudly holding up a bar of KitKat in his hand this time.
âThis one! This one!â he declares, stopping next to Annalise.
âOkay, put it in,â she nods and the little boy throws the chocolate into the cart with a beaming smile. Her eyes flicker back to Harry, who is now staring down at Benji, who is seemingly not that interested in him at the moment, his attention is more focused on the cereals on the shelves.
She is aware she canât really push this conversation, but she also doesnât want Benji to hear it.
âBenji, can you get me three apples? Iâll go get paper towels in the next aisle, alright?â
âThree?â he asks holding up three fingers to make sure he heard her right.
âYes.â
Benji nods and runs off once again, while Annalise grabs a random box of cereal off the shelf and starts pushing her cart, Harry walking along with him.
âItâs nice that you want to prove that you are fine with whatever baggage I come with, but Iâm not stupid, Harry. I know Iâm not the jackpot and Iâm not naĂŻve, Iâm not trying to make myself believe that Iâm easy to date when Iâm clearly not.â
âYou act like you are the only single parent out in the dating field. I genuinely donât think that itâs that big of a deal.â
âYeah, thatâs what you are saying now. But then we would get more involved, youâd grow frustrated that I canât just go after you whenever you feel like it, or that I would have to cancel on plans because Benji is sick or has homework to do that he needs help with. Or that my Friday night consists of playing board games, then watching whatever cartoon Benji is keen on seeing and Iâm in bed by ten while you probably spend these nights out with your friends, hopping from one bar to the other. And Iâm not saying that you shouldnât, thatâs exactly what you should be doing at your age⊠at our age. But for me, itâs just different.â
She is not talking just out of theories. She has tried to date, several times, but it was always kind of doomed from the beginning. Men in their mid-twenties donât want to be a stand-in dad, though itâs completely not what she expects. But as time went by, they all grew tired of having to deal with a kid in the relationship and they all ended up leaving and she canât even blame them. Itâs not what they want in life at this point, but she canât be what they wanted her to be so slowly but surely she gave up on finding a man before she turns thirty and her peers start to get into the whole idea of having a family thatâs already been her reality since she was eighteen.
And the situation is even more complicated with Harry. An international rockstar is definitely not the right person for her and vice versa. She can only imagine what some lowlifes would think when they found out he is dating a single mother. People can be cruel for no damn reason and she is definitely not in the right mindset to be humiliated just because she is a mother.
The two of them move down to the next aisle so she can grab the paper towels along with some dish soap. Harry is keen on making her understand that he is still very much interested and he has nothing against her being a mother. It was just a little shocking to find out this way, instead of hearing about it from her.
âI think you have an unreasonable picture in your head of what my life is like,â he explains. âYes, I do travel a lot and I go to parties, but itâs not what I do most in life. And Iâm not expecting you to turn your whole life around for me.â
âYeah, but dating me is kind of me asking you to turn your whole life around for us,â she simply says and he is stunned at her words, having nothing to bring up against them. âLook,â she sighs. âI appreciate the effort and everything, but I want to save you the time, just like I originally wanted to. I know that it seems reasonable now, but once you get involved, itâs a whole different world, Iâm telling you. And while I would love to give you the chance to prove me wrong, I still have to think about Benji. I canât just drag someone into his life and then have them leave when they figure out itâs not what they want after all. He needs stability around him and itâs enough that he canât get that from his father.â
Harry has a million questions roaming in his head that he is dying to ask. Mostly about the father, because if he is not in the picture, he canât imagine what kind of scumbag he is for leaving someone like her. But he keeps them all to himself, especially when Benji appears again with the three apples, putting them into the cart with a proud smile. The boy turns to Harry this time, finally acknowledging his presence.
âWho are you?â he asks. Harry looks down at him and pushes everything else into the back of his mind as he hunches down a bit, holding out his hand for the boy, a friendly smile playing on his lips.
âIâm Harry, your mumâs friend. Nice to meet you.â
The boy doesnât hesitate to take his right held out, his small hand almost getting lost in Harryâs big palm as they shake hands like two adults. Harry is stunned by how confident he is, unlike most kids his age.
âIâm Benjamin Lloyd,â the boy introduces himself smiling and Harry can see the resemblance now clearer than anything. His smile is certainly his motherâs and the shape of his eyes along with his chin are the exact same as Annaliseâs, leaving only a few traits that must have been inherited from his father.
Benjamin lets go of Harryâs hand and turns back to his mother completely unbothered by the man he just met.
âMum, are we staying on the playground a little?â he asks as they all move down the aisle, heading to the cash register.
âUh, yeah, we can stay for a little, but you need to do homework when we get home. Mrs. Conrad sent me all the work you missed today so we have to catch up on everything. You got away with faking sickness this morning, but you are doing the work you missed.â
Benji doesnât fuss about having to do work, he knew this would happen when he faked to have a tummy ache, he nods understanding the importance of doing his homework and Harry is amazed by how great his behavior is. Most kids his age would have thrown a tantrum over what Annalise just said, but not Benji. He is like a small adult, Harry thinks.
âI honestly donât see why you still have to push me away completely. Did you not enjoy talking with me?â Harry continues as they stand in line, Annalise putting everything to the belt from the cart while Benji is busy playing around the poles that separate the lines.
âOf course I did!â she sighs.
âSo then why canât we just continue? See where it goes?â
âBecause thatâs just not how things work for me,â she says with a soft, sad chuckle.
âWhat, you canât have friends?â Harry asks innocently as Annalise finishes packing, puts a divider on the belt so Harry can put his items behind hers.
âOh, so you just want to be friends?â she asks raising her eyebrows, seeing through him easily. Harry opens his mouth, but then closes, a cheeky smile stretching across her face that makes her chuckle.
âFor now, yeah?â he tries to sound convincing, but itâs more of a joke.
The cashier starts to scan her items so she pushes the cart over to the end and starts packing everything back, Benji still climbing on the poles, completely oblivious to the conversation happening around him, or he just chooses not to listen.
âYou are unbelievable,â she shakes her head at the man in the line. The cashier finishes up with her items and she taps her card on the terminal, pushing the cart away a little.
Harry is scared that sheâll flee the moment she gets the receipt and leaves before she could go after her, but for his biggest surprise, she just pushes the cart a little away from the cash register and starts packing her items into totebags. Benji runs up to her and she gives him his KitKat without a word, the boy happily tearing the packaging open, snacking on the chocolate.
Harry is quick to finish with his items, catching up with Annalise as the three of them head out of the supermarket.
âLook, Iâm gonna be honest with you, I havenât felt like this with anyone in a long time, Lis. I loved talking to you, I feel like we had a connection, and I think you felt it too. I would hate to waste whatever we had so Iâm offering you my friendship. I want to hang out, spend time with you, just as two adults enjoying each otherâs company. Nothing more, if thatâs what you really want for now. And we can see where it heads later. How does that sound?â
They reach her car and Benji runs to the backseat, tearing the door open while Annalise opens the trunk and she is surprised to see Harry help her pack her bags into the car, but she doesnât protest.
âI really donât knowâŠâ she sighs.
âCome on! Just friends. Give it a try! I have a great feeling about it and I promise to be very careful. I understand that you need boundaries because of Benji and Iâm not trying to make you uncomfortable in any way. But you do have to realize that you need to open up at one point. You canât use him as an excuse forever.â
âIâm not using him as an excuse!â she points out, but she can feel how thatâs not the whole truth.
âWhatever helps you sleep at night, Lis,â Harry smirks, pulling his phone out of his coatâs pocket and unlocking it he holds it out for her once she has closed the trunk. âIâm just asking for your phone number, not to travel the world with me. You can decide to block me later if you change your mind, itâs nothing serious, alright?â
Annaliseâs hesitation is clearer than the light and in any other case, he would take offence at it, but not with her. Harry is keen on proving to her that he meant everything he said and that he is willing to take a chance with her.
Chewing on the inside of her cheeks, she glances back at Benji, who has climbed into his seat in the back of the car. She is fighting with herself, bringing up all pros and contras until she finally caves in. Grabbing the phone from Harryâs hand she types her number in and gives herself a ring so she can save his number as well. She hands the device back and Harryâs smile is so wide, she almost wants to punch him in the face, but she can also feel the excitement running through her veins.
âGreat. You wonât regret it, Lis,â Harry beams shoving his phone back into his pocket. His hand reaches for her arm and gives it a gentle squeeze as he doesnât want to try anything further with her at the moment.
âI better not,â she mumbles shaking her head before turning around to buckle Benji in. When thatâs done she pays one last glance at Harry who stands at the car next to hers, watching her get behind the wheel and back out from her spot. He waves at her happily and she just nods in his way before turning around the car and driving away.
âWhy the fuck didnât you tell me?!â Harry rages through the phone, his anger only met with a soft chuckle from Griff on the other end of the call.
âMate, I told ya, sânot my place! She didnât tell ya, so I didnât either.â
âYou saw how hooked I was on her! You could have, no, no⊠you should have told me!â
Harry was quick to run back to the studio and called Griff right away to load everything out on him. He felt betrayed that his friend didnât let him know this small little detail even after seeing him all crushed after she left without a trace to find her. He gets his reasoning, he does, but it still doesnât stop him from being so bloody mad at his mate.
âSorry! I really am sorry! But I know how protective she is over Benji. I was not gonna betray her like thaâ.â
Harry takes a deep breath, paying up and down the hallway in the studio, trying his best to calm his nerves. Itâs an unfortunate situation as a whole, he sees that clearly, but the frustration how it had to go down at the end is getting the best out of him for sure. He is not mad at one specific person, because everyone was doing what they thought to be the best, but everything added up to be such a shitty outcome, or at least on Harryâs side.
Pinching the bridge of his nose he huffs again, putting aside his burning emotions.
âOkay, okay. Sorry to snap at you like that, it was just⊠a lot.â
âI get it, donâ worry about it,â Griff assures him, glasses clinking behind him somewhere, he is probably working at the pub as they are speaking. âShe gave ya her number now, right?â
âYeah, she didnât want to, but I talked her ears off,â Harry chuckles lowly. He could still feel the excitement that rushed through him when she finally gave in.
âMâhappy for ya, mate. But please be bloody careful. She doesnât need any shit right now, has enough on her plate.â
âI know. Iâm just trying to be her friend first, thatâs all.â
âAlright. Swing by the pub sometime soon, if ya want.â
âSure thing. Bye Griff,â Harry smiles before ending the call.
Walking back into the recording room, all eyes snap up to him and he stops in his track.
âWhat?â
âThe hell was that about?â Sarah questions, asking in the name of everyone in the room. They all just heard his rage outside and now are dying to know what it was about.
âI uhhâI found her,â he simply says and watches all his bandmates gawk back at him with wide eyes.
âWhat? Did you like, hire a private investigator or something?â Charlotte asks, making Harry chuckle as he shakes his head no.
âNo, I ran into her at Tesco. Well, her and her⊠son.â
His last word washes out the whole room, everyone stops breathing for a moment as they stare back at Harry who has that âyeah, you heard me rightâ look on his face.
âA son?â Mitch asks snapping out of his shock. âLike a proper kid?â
âHow do you not have a proper kid?â Harry asks him with a look.
âI donât know! Iâm just⊠surprised. How old is the kid?â
âLike six or seven. She said something about being a first grader.â
âDidnât you say she is a year younger than you?â Sarah asks, as everyone is doing the silent math in their head.
âShe is, with one year. Or thatâs what she told me.â
âThat makes her, what, like eighteen when she had the kid? And what about the father?â Charlotte trails, still trying hard to put the picture together.
âShe didnât say much, but from what I understood, he is not really in the picture. So at least she is not married or something,â Harry adds, still open about the relief he is feeling about that information.
âThis shit is twisted,â Sarah huffs. âSo whatâs gonna happen now? Did you ask for her number again?â
âAsk?â Harry chuckles bitterly. âI begged, Sarah. I was ready to be on my knees in the middle of a bloody Tesco.â
A round of laughter runs through the room and the mood finally eases a little after the shock that just set in. It wasnât the fact that Annalise had a son that sent everyone over the edge, but rather that she didnât say a single word about it and how it all surfaced.
âAnd did she give it to you?â Mitch prompts and Harry nods, a shy smile stretching on his lips as the two girls start clapping and cheering.
They all saw his long face after New Yearâs Eve, it couldnât be missed how he was moping around for weeks. He told them all about this girl he met, who completely blew his mind just before breaking his heart. Now that she was found and gave him just a small crumble of information about her to him that makes him able to contact her, the change is visible. That little sparkle in his eyes is back and thatâs all his friends wanted to see.
âSo what are you gonna do now?â Sarah asks as Harry walks over to one of the armchairs and makes himself comfortable.
âNow⊠Iâll try not to scare her off. Hopefully she wonât push me away and at least let me be her friend.â
âFriend? Is that what you want to be?â
âOf course not,â he sighs, his head dropping to the back of the armchair. âBut this is all I can do for now.â
They all just nod, tasting his words and letting everything that just happened sink in. Harry is doing the same, he has a lot to think about and figure out, but thereâs one thing he is one hundred percent sure about: he will not give up on Annalise.
NEXT PART
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Real Life Tasks With Ransom Drysdale
An Advent Calendar Of 24 Normal Human Tasks As Performed By A Huge Man Baby
Day 14: There Is Only One Way To Load A Dishwasher
Warnings: Bad Language Words
Pairing: Ransom Drysdale x Reader
A/N- Oh we are getting closer. And this particular scenario happened between my father and me one night. Luckily no one cut themselves, but we were in a severe disagreement as to how sharp knives were to go into the dishwasher. Turns out I was the logical one. Donât forget to keep an eye out for @what-is-your-plan-todayâ and @ohthankevans13â for there updates.Â
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There was the loud sharp sound of laughter from the outdoor patio, which Ransom joined in as well with his own genuine laugh while having a firm hold of your thigh under the table, his thumb sweeping back and forth over the soft material of your leggings while your hand was clasped over his in reassurance, easing his hand loose to weave your fingers through his.Â
This evening a couple friends of yours came over to the house to visit and have dinner, which you knew Ransom had been a bit apprehensive with. Not that he didnât like your friends, sure he did, they were perfectly nice people you had grown up with, Rick and Sandy. But they werenât like Ransomâs usual friends, other people in the same arrangement he had been, trust fund kids who didnât give two shits about anyone but themselves. Perhaps that was a good thing. He was still learning how this whole being married thing worked.Â
So Ransom was a bit nervous all damn day, brushing it off though as in âHe was Ransom Drysdale and did not give a shit what anyone thought about him.â You knew this to be a lie, that he actually wanted to make a good impression on them. Just from the way he was acting all day, double checking there was enough wine and beer for your guests. That the house was generally picked up looking. He even offered to go pick up dinner, which you were not going to say no to. Writing out a list with a firm âJust pick up this list, NOTHING ELSE.âÂ
And it just raised your suspicions when he came home with steaks. High end expensive steaks that had been hand cut by the butcher at their local shop. You gawked at them as you had actually put burgers on your list. You peeked in the rest of the bags. There wasn't the buns, chips or anything else you had written. But the ingredients for grilled veggies, potato and garlic bread.Â
âYou didn't have to do this Ransom. I thought you were going to stick to the list?â You remarked as you looked at the steaks he so carefully let laid to rest on the kitchen counter before taking them to be grilled.Â
âWell if we're going to entertain, weâre doing it right.â He responded and that's when it clicked, this was his way of showing he could take care of his family, be something more than what everyone thought him to be, so you dropped it. Going to your tiptoes, you pecked his cheek with a thank you, and went from there.Â
Now it was the end of dinner, you felt Ransom relax more and all four of you enjoyed a fun conversation, some of which was Rick and Sandy filling Ransom in on some of your younger years, a devilish grin would spread across his face. âOh trust me, she's still just as bad, just better at hiding it.âÂ
âHush I'm an angel.â You made a move to gather some dishes when Ransom sprang up to take them from you. âYou are the one who fully corrupted me Ransom.â you smirked at him, which you could see a bit of color rise in his cheeks and his eyes crinkling in the corners with a grin.Â
âSomething I take great pride in Princess. I got the clean up, you continue visiting.â He offered and you smiled a thank you while settling back down. Rick and Sandy gathered their plates, with nothing but praises for the whole meal, especially those perfectly grilled steaks, which you glanced at Ransom to see a slight satisfied smirk tugging at the corner of his lips before you turned back to your friends.Â
Ransom headed back into the house from the patio with the plates and utensils, listening while you restarted the conversation. He didn't bother shutting the door, leaving it open to let the conversation flow into the house as well as the breeze of the evening. Flicking on the overhead light, he popped open the dishwasher and started to randomly put plates in wherever they fit as the dishwasher was already half full from the night beforeâs dishes as well as their breakfast ones. Then he started dumping the utensils into the tray lining the side made specifically for them. He wasn't paying attention though, forks were going in tines down or up, spoons shoved in any spot they would fit and the wickedly sharp steak knives went in handle down, their points glinting maliciously face up, ready to strike any unsuspecting hand.Â
Which Ransom did, when he grasped another bundle to shove in, and his palm, slid along the tip of the knife along the meatiest part, near his thumb.Â
A blossom of red spread on his hand, as well as a sharp surprising pain, making him jerk back and clatter the handful of forks across the dishwasher and floor. âSon of a Bitch!â He yelled rather loudly in shock as red droplets dripped over the dirty dishes and across the tile floor till he got to the sink and turned on the tap. He could feel a wave of naseau wash over him as his vision blurred a moment and sharpened seeing the red swirl down the sink.Â
You happened to hear Ransom yelp and curse as the door was open, as well as Rick and Sandy who looked with concern towards the house. A glance over your shoulder showed Ransom standing at the kitchen sink, and you could see from there that his face was tensed and almost in pain looking. âExcuse me.â You said hurriedly and pushed from the patio table to rush inside. âRansom? Oh god what happened?â You grabbed a hand towel to press against the gash on his hand to get the bleeding to stop, his face whiter then usual. âBreath Ransom, donât pass out.â You tried to draw his attention to you instead of at the red welling up again before you pressed the towel against it.Â
He hissed when you pressed down from between clenched teeth. âFucking knife got me while I was loading the dishwasher.âÂ
You glanced at the dishwasher and could see the mess that it was left in. Knowing you would have to set it straight, especially the knives, as half of them appeared to have been tossed in point up.Â
âChrist Ransom, you gotta put the knives point down for this reason.â You said hurriedly as you pried the towel up to take a peek at his hand. âWe have to take you to the emergency room, this is pretty deep. You are going to need stitches.âÂ
âNah- I should be alright.â He started when he wobbled a bit, his other hand grasping the edge of the counter. Its that moment Sandy poked her head in.Â
âDo you guys need any help?âÂ
You were immediate before Ransom could protest. âHow about a rain check on Cards Against Humanity? I think we need to get some stitches for Ransom.âÂ
Sandy then came in fully to take a look at Ransom's hand. âLet me take a look? Iâm a nurse, and can tell you if they will give you any stitches.âÂ
Ransom lifted the hand towel once more and she hummed while looking at it. âYup, looks just like the cut Rick had a couple years ago. Steak knife get you?âÂ
âNot fucking intentionally.â Ransom growled a bit, getting agitated now feeling he was under scrutiny.Â
âHa, Rick said the same thing.â Sandy chuckled and her husband came in, happening to hear her.
âWell I forgot I put the knife in the water when I was washing the dishes.â He came to Ransomâs defense with a dumbass excuse and at this point Ransom was ready to go to the emergency room, just to get out of this curve of a disaster the evening took.
Sandy dabbled at the wound with the cloth when the blood welled up again and Ransom this time felt his head swarm. âIm going to...â and thats when he slumped, you and Sandy trying to catch him and Rick managing to get his arms under Ransoms armpits and ease him down to the floor. You straightened up with a hand against your lower back and one pressed to your baby bump, sighing.Â
âRansom canât handle blood... Iâm hoping this isnât whats going to happen with shitty diapers to.âÂ
***************************
After You managed to get Ransom to the emergency room, and he was once again patched up and left alone, you were sitting nearby, counting your fingers and muttering to yourself.Â
âWhat are you doing Y/N?â Ransom winced as he flexed his hand a bit, and you smirk at him.Â
âCounting how many times we have been to the emergency room in the past 6 months. This makes three times. You are like a walking talking disaster Ransom, Iâm a bit surprised it has been this long since weâve last visitied.âÂ
He glared at you while he stood and took his coat from you to shrug it on. âEat Shit Y/N, I never visited the emergency room till I hooked up with you. What does that say?âÂ
You shrugged. âThat Iâm not as much as a dumbass as you Ransom, but thatâs okay. I love you anyways.â You tuck into his side as you two leave the room.Â
âYea yea, Love you to Y/N.â He rolled his eyes, wincing as he dug his injured hand into his coat pocket, looking for the Beamers keys.
#real life tasks with ransom drysdale#ransom drysdale x you#ransom drysdale#amber writes#sweater writes
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Will They Wonât They | Part 4/4 [Reggie Peters]
Pairings: Reggie Peters x fem!Reader
Words: 6.0K
WARNINGS: swears, ANGST
A/N: oh my god itâs finally here. the last part. our baby. i literally canât believe it iâm almost in tears. thank you so mcuh for being with us this past week and sharing the joy drea and i have had writing this for you guys. please iâm literally begging you guys to SEND IN MEMES youâve made related to this series they make our day. anyways lots of love babes - mimi
A/N:Â GUYS ITâS THE LAST ONE IM SO EXCITED SEND MEMES PLEASE - drea
             â€âââââââââââââââââââââ„
â(Y/N) excited for a school function that doesnât require academics?â Rose questioned.
âSomeone called the police thereâs been a kidnapping!â Alex exclaimed.
âOh so now you want the police involved,â you crossed your arms and rolled your eyes.
âHow are you still not over that!â Luke exclaimed. âI took you in and fed you, and bought you clothes and loved you,â he said exaggeratedly and you just pushed away his pouting face from yours.
âAnd how am I not allowed to want to go to a school dance? I like having fun every once in a while. The last time I checked that wasnât a crime,â
âYeah itâs not a crime if youâre anyone but (Y/N) (L/N),â Bobby nudged you and you sighed loudly. âHey whereâs Reggie by the way? I thought he was going to come,â
âI think he is,â Alex nodded. âHe said something about maybe having to walk, his parents are busy,â
You bit the inside of your cheek hoping the Peters could hold off fighting for one night, Reggie deserved a break. They might not have realized it, but he secretly blamed himself for it all even though it could be nothing further from the fact. You knew that well enough.
âHey Iâm here,â Reggie said, jogging up to the group that was waiting for him so they could head inside the school. âSorry Iâm late,â he apologized. âI got a little distracted when leaving.â You could tell he was lying but didnât speak up about it.
Luke shook his head, patting Reggieâs back with the hand that wasnât holding his guitar case. âItâs all good,â he said with a grin. âWhat matters is that weâre all here, and ready to rock these nerds!â
Rose made a sour face. âWeâre still here,â she pointed out, gesturing to the two of you.
âRight,â Bobby nodded, elbowing Luke in the ribs. âLetâs rock these nerds except for our fashionista Rose and (N/N)!â
You beamed. âThank you!â
âThe ultra nerd!â
âFuck you!â you shot back.
Reggie pulled you into a side hug. âLeave Cookie alone,â he told them. âThe only one who gets to tease her is me.â
You rolled your eyes as Luke grabbed you by your wrist. âHands off my daughter,â he warned. âAnd for the record, no one teases my child? Say one word and Iâll fight you myself.â
âIf someone pulls me like a rag doll one more time itâll be your sorry asses that get beat,â you threatened.
Luke beamed at you, pinching your cheek. âOh, she learned how to threaten people!â he gushed. âLike mother, like daughter.â
You pushed them all towards the stage. âAlright, you dorks,â you grumbled. âGet on stage. Make me a happy bunny, or whatever.â
The boys saluted before marching off. âGot it, Lady Bunny!â they cheered as they made it backstage.
You glanced over at Rose who had her arms crossed on her chest as she shook her head. âThose boys,â she sighed. âI can never understand how we put up with them.â
Shrugging your shoulders, you took Roseâs hand in yours. âYou gotta admit, theyâre growing on us,â you joked. âNow come on, letâs get to the dance floor!â
You and Rose watched as the boys finally got on stage, their instruments ready in their hands. Luke took the microphone and smiled widely at the crowd.
âWhatâs up, Los Feliz High?â he said into the microphone. A roar of cheers followed, making Luke laugh. âWeâre Sunset Curve, and this is one of our original songs. Itâs called Now or Never.â
The entire school adored Sunset Curve and their music. By the time they were finished, they were cheering for more. It made you happy to know that those boys were bound to go far with their music.
You and Rose met the boys backstage where they were putting away their things and getting ready to come and join you out and dance.
âGuys that was amazing!â you exclaimed with a grin. âYou all played so well,â
âIâm so proud of my little renters,â Rose joked and the guys all laughed, tossing their things aside before dragging you and Rose to the dance floor.
Now that the DJ had taken over, the guys were able to finally dance with you guys. In a circle, the group and you sang along to the music, occasionally jumping up and down and screaming the lyrics.
In the corner of your eye, you saw Rose continuously glancing back at a boy in the back of the gym. Following her gaze, you lit up at who you saw. You pulled Rose down to your level, whispering in her ear,
âRay Molina, an absolute sweetheart and my coworker at the cafe. Loves photography and apparently you. Now go!â
Rose blushed, shaking her head repeatedly. âNo, I can't,â she stammered.
Rolling your eyes, you grabbed her shoulders and pushed her towards your friend. âRay!â you greeted excitedly. âThis is Rose! She loves espressos and photography.â
The shy boy put his hand out for Rose to shake. âHi,â he whispered nervously. âI like your jacket. The flower is...gorgeous. What is it?â
Rose grinned. âA dahlia,â she replied, finally going back to her normal, extroverted self.
You sent Ray a big thumbs up from behind along with an exaggerated wink before heading back to the boys.
You saw Alex awkwardly shuffling his feet while Luke, Reggie, and Bobby were dancing and making complete fools of themselves, but that was kind of the point wasnât it.
So you made your way to him, grabbing his hands and pulling him more into the dance floor with you.
âCome on Alex you gotta let loose!â you insisted while attempting to twirl him around.
âUm who are you and what did you do with the real (Y/N)?â he joked and you rolled your eyes.
âAlready been over this Mercer! Seriously though, I know you get anxious and nervous, I do too and you know what helps me?â you whispered. âSinging,â
âActually?â
âYeah! It calms me down,â you admitted. âSo come on, you know the song! Belt it with me!â
Alex scrunched his nose and you frowned and started to sing, proving to him just how much it could help.
Slowly he got more comfortable until it felt like it was just the two of you dancing around like friends did and singing Whitney Hustonâs greatest hit.
âOh, I wanna dance with somebody! I wanna feel the heat with somebody! Yeah, I wanna dance with somebody! With somebody who loves me!â
Alex, finally out of his shell, danced along energetically to the music with your hands intertwined. Occasionally he would pull you close and spin you like no one was around. You had to admit, the boy had a talent for dancing. He would definitely make Mrs. Leona proud.
Reggie watched you and Alex dance and fool around, laughing with your heads tilted back. Reggie couldnât help but smile as you belted the lyrics with Alex joining in. He was shocked, to say the least, to see Alex so carefree. You really did bring out the best in people. He would know, you brought out the best in him.
Reggie barely noticed Bobby walk over to him, his eyes following Reggieâs to the dancing friends. The boy smirked, shaking his head. âYou got it bad, donât you?â
Reggie couldnât help but nod. âYeah, I do,â was all he could say.
âYou gonna do anything about it?â Luke joined in and Reggie shrugged.
âI donât know. Sometimes I wonder if maybe if I say something or do something, that look she has, how happy she is, itâs gonna change and I donât want that to happen,â he admitted.
âI know itâs a weird thing to ask, but what do you like most about her?â Bobby asked.
Reggie had a stupid smile on his face, shaking his head and covering his mouth with his hand,
âEverything,â he shrugged his shoulders. âAbsolutely everything,â
You and Alex had since then finished dancing to the song and ran up to the other three boys who were chatting. You were out of breath with a huge grin on your face when you looked at Reggie who couldnât stop thinking about how adorable you looked with your flushed cheeks.
âEverything alright Flicka?â you asked.
âEverythingâs perfect, Cookie,â he nodded.
And perfect it was.
â
You sighed as Rose brushed through your hair for probably the millionth time that hour.
âCan you guys at least explain what youâre doing to me?â you whined. âI feel like Iâve been sitting here for ages and have like...a hundred layers of makeup on my face.â
Alex glanced up from the random magazine he found on Roseâs bedroom floor. âNope,â he responded, sprawled lazily on Roseâs bed. âYouâre going to find out soon enough.â
You grumbled to yourself. âIf you make me look like a clown, Rose-â
Rose laughed, taking a lipstick tube and swiping it against your bottom lip. âYouâre fine,â she reassured you. âBesides, this is my work weâre talking about. I have skills, and Iâm going to flaunt them.â You giggled, finally relaxing as the girl continued to fix your hair and makeup.
Nearly another hour passed when Alex glanced at the clock. âShoot, we have to be at the arcade in twenty minutes.â
You rolled your eyes. âAnd with your grandpa driving, weâre not going to get there until the next decade.â
Alex rolled off the bed, waving his keys in front of your face. âWhoâs the one with the driverâs license again?â he asked.
You stuck your tongue out at him. âFuck you, my driverâs instructor totally had it out for me. And you donât even have a real van, it's a minivan.â
Alex flipped you off. âHaha, now letâs get going.â
âOne second,â Rose said. The girl reached into your jewelry box, pulling out your horseshoe necklace. Before you could protest, she clasped it around your neck. With an approving smile, Rose pulled you up to your feet. âCome on, Cinderella,â she teased. âYouâre ready for the ball.â
âLetâs stop by the studio first,â you said, straightening out your white shirt. âI left my bag in there.â
You and Rose made your way to the studio, parting so that you can grab your bag that was sitting on the coffee table. Rose followed close behind, picking up the lone red flannel on the couch. Walking behind you, Rose quickly tied the flannel around your waist.
âRose, whatâs this for?â you asked, eyeing the flannel.
She waved your question off casually. âIt completes the look,â she explained. âNow, letâs get to the van before Alex leaves us!â
You hopped in the van with Rose as Alex drove off to the arcade, much faster than necessary to prove he wasnât a slow driver, not that you thought this was how he was going to retaliate that comment.
By the time you reached there Luke, Bobby, and Reggie were all waiting by the claw machine.
âWhat took you guys so long?â Bobby asked and you pointed at both Alex and Rose in blame.
âWow, I think I just saw the bus that you decided to throw us under,â Rose shook her head, turning it just the right direction to see a certain amateur photographer sitting at one of the tables with a few friends. Immediately, her face turned into a million shades of red.
âOh is that Ray?â Luke asked, quickly joining in on the conversation.
âUm, can we maybe address that later?â Reggie asked. âCause Iâm pretty sure thatâs my flannel,â he pointed to the fabric tied around your waist.
âOh my God is it? Is it? I knew it looked familiar,â you said while trying to untie it from your waist but Reggie put a hand on yours, stopping you from doing so.
âItâs fine Cookie,â he shrugged. âKeep it, I have a few. It looks good on you,â
You blushed and nodded, tightening the flannel again around your waist.
âOkay, so whatâs the first thing you guys normally do?â you asked, knowing them they probably did some sort of voodoo ritual before playing games, they were weird like that. âOh and Rose you should call Ray over to join us cause if you donât I will,â you said in a sing-song voice. Roseâs face turned red as she repeatedly shook her head.
Luke called out to the group to get everyoneâs attention. âGame plan, kids,â he said.
You rolled your eyes. âOf course thereâs a game plan,â you groaned.
The guitarist shot you a look before continuing. âAnyway,â he said. âFirst we start with the basketball shooting game, then we work down the aisle, all the way down to the claw machines. Donât spend any longer than five minutes on each claw machine game. We all know those games are bullshit. If you have any coins left, use them on the game youâre best at.â
You made a sour face. âYet you guys call me the nerd of the group,â you scoffed, crossing your arms on your chest.
âHey, donât disrespect the arcade kings,â Bobby shot back. âWe practically own this arcade.â
âSure, whatever helps you sleep at night.â
â(Y/N) why donât you come with me and play some basketball,â Alex suggested.
âYouâre just saying that cause you know my hand-eye coordination sucks and you wanna see me fail,â you said sticking your tongue out at him.
âYeah and Iâm not even gonna deny it, come on,â Alex said, dragging you over to where the game was and placing some tokens in the machine.
âAlex,â you whined. âI donât wanna,â
He shot you a grin in your direction. âLetâs play, and the loser has to pay for pizza later?â
You narrowed your eyes in determination. âYouâre on, Mercer.â
Time continued to fly by faster than you preferred. You and Alex had played every game nearly three times now and you were running low on coins and energy. Losing count on your wins, the two of you decided to call it a tie.
âLetâs go sit by the skeeball machines,â you suggested.
Slightly out of breath from running down the aisles to race you, Alex nodded gratefully. Hand in hand, you guided Alex through the waves of teens and children to finally find the benches in the quietest â well as quiet as an arcade can get â part of the building.
You glanced over at Alex, his cheeks flushed from playing. âYou want me to go get you some water?â you asked, slightly concerned.
âIf itâs not too much trouble,â he said, smiling slightly.
Standing up, you made your way to the vending machines, only to be stopped by the sound of a high pitched giggle. Hiding behind one of the game machines, you peeked to see Reggie and some blonde girl talk to each other. They were standing far too close for your liking as the girl pulled Reggie down to her level, whispering something in his ear that made him laugh.
Your face was burning. Something about the two of them together didnât sit well with you. After a second of thinking, you decided you were upset because Reggie left you guys to go hang out with some girl. You were upset about the band not spending time together. Definitely not because Reggie was talking to another girl...smiling at her the way he does with you, and holding her waist like he did with you during your dance detention, and absolutely not because heâs joking around with her like he used to with you.
Ripping your eyes away from them, you stormed back to Alex, chucking the water bottle at him. The poor boy barely caught it, raising an eyebrow in confusion at you.
â(N/N), you okay?â he asked, setting his water bottle down to place his hand on your knee.
You nodded rigidly. âOf course I am,â you briskly answered.
âSorry (N/N), I know fine and this clearly isnât it,â Alex countered, still not understanding what was going on until he stood up to take a quick stretch, seeing Reggie tucked away by one of the arcade games with another girl. âOh, I see,â
âWhat do you mean you see?â you asked. âThereâs nothing to see,â
âUm Iâd beg to differ,â Alex countered yet again. â(Y/N) if youâre upset you should just go talk to him, Iâm sure Reggie will be reasonable.â
âYeah right, reasonable is Reggieâs middle name,â you said sarcastically.
â(Y/N),â Alex said pleaded, âI swear to sweet little baby Jesus just go to him, please, put me out of my misery,â
âI guess youâre going to have to suffer,â you said stubbornly, making Alex roll his eyes and groan.
Luke and Bobby ran up to you guys. âWe think itâs time we head back to the studio,â Luke told you two. âItâs nearly dark, and you know how much Alex hates driving at night.â
Alex shuddered. âFine, letâs go,â he said before turning to you. âDonât think weâre done with this conversation.â
The entire group filed into the car, Rose giving Ray a kiss on the cheek before joining you. Rose began to tell you about her little date, not skipping any detail. For the time you were together, you started to forget why you were mad.
But then Reggie entered the van. âHey guys!â he greeted energetically, finding his spot in the back. You remained silent while everyone else said their âhellos.â
âHow was everyoneâs time at the arcade?â he continued to talk. Reggie glanced over at you. âDid you win against Alex? I know heâs terrible at playing games, but so are you so itâs an equal playing field.â
Normally, you would have laughed. But this time, you didnât even look him in the eye. âIt was fine,â you said stiffly.
Reggie snorted. âJust fine, come on, Cookie, I-â
âWhy donât you tell us about that girl you were talking to the entire time, then?â you cut him off, staring out the window to stop yourself from crying.
âWhat girl?â Rose asked, whipping her head around and narrowing her eyes.
âNo oneâ he answered quickly.
You scoffed, crossing your arms on your chest. âSo itâs okay for you to lie, but not me?â you muttered.
Reggie raised an eyebrow at your weird behaviour, but remained silent for the rest of the ride. If there was something wrong, heâd talk to you properly, and in private.
The moment Alex parked in the driveway, you quickly unbuckled your seatbelt and left the van with Rose glued to your side.
âWhat happened?â Rose asked in a hushed voice.
âNothing!â you said frustratedly. âYou and Alex keep on making things out of nothing. Iâm telling you, thereâs nothing wrong.â
As the night continued, you were still bitter towards Reggie, occasionally throwing out a sarcastic remark towards him. The group, to say the least, was very confused as to how your friendship with Reggie somehow shattered in just five hours.
âLetâs watch another movie,â Rose proposed after the first movie ended. Everyone else nodded, as Reggie piped up,
âCan we watch Star Wars?â he asked. âIâm really in the mood to-â
You groaned. âWill you just shut up,â
Reggie looked over at you stunned and just before Luke was going to say something Reggie grabbed your arm and looked at you with a serious face,
âCan I talk to you? Alone,â he said cooly.
You were about to respond with a sarcastic retort, but he stopped you by pulling you up and dragging you out of the studio into the brick open-spaced area around the rock garden.
âWhat the hell (Y/N),â he deadpanned.
âWhat do you mean what the hell?â you asked innocently and Reggie scoffed, letting go of your arm and looking away.
âEnough of the fucking bullshit (Y/N)!â
âWhat bullshit Reggie please enlighten me because I wasnât the one ditching the gang to spend time with some random blonde,â
âYou have no right!â Reggie angrily exclaimed, pointing roughly at you. His eyes were dark with anger, unlike anything youâve seen before. âYou have no right to say- t-to act like a child after what happened?â
You rolled your eyes. âWhat are you talking about?â you demanded.
Reggie laughed to himself, frustratedly running his fingers through his hair before looking back at you. âI donât fucking understand you,â he hissed. âYouâre so frustrating and unpredictable. First, you joke around with me, blush when I tell jokes or better yet flirt, but the moment I step out of line even an inch, you turn around and hate me again! I donât get it, what the fuck do you want from me?â
âI want you!â you cried out. âDammit, Reggie. I want you, but sometimes youâre so far up your ass you canât even tell!â
âMe?â he yelled back. âI gave you so many chances. You wanted time? I gave you plenty of it! I have you so many opportunities that you ignored so donât you fucking dare pin this on me.â Reggie didnât bother letting you try and defend yourself. âYou said it yourself, you wondered when people will leave you, and that youâll be left alone again. Hereâs the reality, (Y/N). People donât leave you, you push them away. You put the blame on everyone but yourself, so all youâre left with are your own broken pieces. Face it, youâve never changed.â
You staggered back, feeling as though you were caught under a wave of emotions. He was right. Every single word he said...was right. And damn, it hurt so much to realize it.
Reggie looked up from his shoes. âI want that necklace back,â he said in a low voice. âI donât want to see you with it, or any piece of me, ever again. You hear me? Iâm done. Iâm done with your mind games. Iâm tired of waiting for you. Iâm done with you.â
There it was. The moment you were waiting for, the reason for Reggie to step out of your life again. Or, in reality, the reason that made Reggie realize you werenât worth it anymore.
You quickly unclasped the necklace, throwing it on the ground along with his flannel.
Before leaving, you looked at him one more time. âIt was always me, wasnât it?â you whispered in a broken voice. âI was always the reason. The problem. The second choice. Right?â Reggie refused to look you in the eye. You wiped away your tears, a sad attempt to, really. More tears just took their place.
âI tried, Reggie,â you told him in a quiet voice. âI really did. B-but if Iâm the only thing thatâs holding you back, then let me go.â
Reggie remained silent. Taking it as your cue to leave, you ran down the street, not bothering to say goodbye to your friends.
And just like that, you were alone again. Just like you predicted.
â
As if your week couldnât get any worse, the universe didnât fail you. You had detention with him. And even better, you were forced to sit in silence with him.
Seriously you thought to yourself Did he actually fall asleep while supervising detention.
Mr. Alderman, the gym teacher, was fast asleep, snoring at his desk.
You hadnât spoken since your fight a few nights ago, the emotions still fresh under your skin, burning your eyes and throat, just making you wish for it to end.
Reggie muttered something under his breath and for the first time in a few days you took a good look at him.
His eyes were sunken and he seemed angry. It radiated off him like light bouncing off a mirror.
âHave something to say, Peters,â you whispered quietly.
âYeah, Iâm leaving,â he nodded, standing up and grabbing his bag.
âYou canât leave,â you said flatly.
âWatch me,â he turned his back and you followed him out of the class and into the hallway.
âReggie stop,â
âNo (Y/N)! Iâm not stopping anymore! Iâm not waiting anymore!â
âIâm not asking you to do that Reggie! Itâs me, Iâm leaving okay?!â you exclaimed.
âW-What?â his voice grew quiet.
âIâm transferring out at the end of the week,â you look at him with stone-cold eyes. âNot that you would care.â
â(Y/N), you...Wait you canât-!â
âStop telling me what I can and can't do Reggie! I hate that my fucking feelings are controlled by you! I hate that my entire life will be spent trying to find someone to live up to you! I just want some fucking peace and quiet for once in my life!â you sobbed, unable to bottle things up anymore. âI work and I work and I work and I get nothing! I try and I try and I try and I still get nothing! And maybe thatâs because I canât be in control when Iâm around you so yes Iâm leaving!â
Reggie didnât say anything, he just stared at you blankly, the only sound in the empty hallways was that of your soft cries.
âI canât do this anymore,â you choked out, turning around and running out through the back of the school and into the pouring rain, not even bothering to hide for cover under the pavilion; falling to your knees and wrapping your arms around your waist as the most devastating sounds ripped from your heart and soul.
You cried until you couldnât cry anymore. Scream until your throat was raw. Pulled at your hair and kicked yourself, ashamed and frustrated, until the pain was too much. But even then, it could never match the pain you were feeling in your heart.
It felt good, felt right to feel this way. Ever since middle school, you had been told you were a robot, an emotionless nothing.
Look at you now. Crying like everything had up and left in your life because it did. You were alone, left behind to pick up your broken pieces. Just like Reggie said.
You hated how Reggie was right about everything. You had no right to be mad because it was true. You pushed everyone away, placed the blame on them so that you didnât have to get hurt. Is this how he felt? Did you ever make him feel this way?
The cold air angrily nipped at your fingertips, your eyes red from the weather and your tears. Turning your head, you looked at the school door, internally hoping that maybe it would swing open. Maybe Reggie would come out of the building and take you in his arms and tell you that everything will be alright.
The door never opened. Reggie never came. You were left alone with your thoughts in the pavilion.
And the rain continued to pour on and on.
â
Reggie was distracted the entire practice. His fingers would roughly strum against his strings as he stared off into the distance, a faraway look on his face.
Luke, having noticed Reggieâs odd behaviour, stopped playing.
âHey, Reg you wanna cool it on those strings?â Luke asked.
âOr does he need to mention how much money we have combined,â Bobby added.
âItâs negative seven hundred forty-five dollars and thirty-two cents.â Luke deadpanned and Alex rolled his eyes.
âAre you mad at Alex again?â Bobby asked and for a moment the blond drummer looked frightened.
âNo, itâs not that,â Reggie shook his head.
âItâs (Y/N), isnât it,â Rose said softly, looking at the bassist with sympathetic eyes. Just as Reggie was about to ask how she knew, Rose answered the question. âYou keep looking at the spot on the couch where she used to sit during practices,â
Reggie chewed hard on the inside of his cheek while Luke came closer to him, laying a hand on his shoulder.
âYou donât need to bottle it up,â Luke whispered. âWeâre here for you. You know that.â
âI messed up,â the tone of his voice was wavering as he tried to make sure it didnât crack. âI messed up so fucking bad. The only thing Iâm good at is pushing the good things in my life away until I fuck it up entirely. Iâm a time bomb. Itâs only going to get worse the longer people are around me,â
Reggie carefully slid his bassâ strap off his shoulder and placed his instrument against the couch where you would normally sit.
âNo youâre not,â Alex told him, quickly coming to join Luke next to his friend. Bobby and Rose followed soon after and before long Reggieâs head was tucked in Lukeâs shoulder as tears finally streamed from his eyes and his friends surrounded him like a shield from the cruel world.
âArenât I?â Reggie croaked. âI can't even talk to you guys without exploding or storming off, a-and (Y/N), sheâll never forgive me for all the things Iâve said and done⊠I donât deserve any of your guys,â
âReggie cariño, everyone deserves a family,â Rose said in a soothing voice. âAnd weâre each otherâs family. Family sticks together no matter what, even if you donât think they should.â
âAnd what about (Y/N)?â he whispered. âHow could I possibly erase all that?â
âYou donât,â Luke spoke up. âYou use it, use it to apologize. Use it,â he repeated, placing his songwriting pen in Reggieâs hand.
Reggie bit his lips and took the pen from Luke, seeing his tattered red book resting on the couch.
He was sure it wasnât the first time he wrote something for you and it definitely wouldnât be the last, but it just might have been the first one youâd hear, so it had to be perfect.
And somehow, just like youâd always managed to do, the only thing on Reggie Peters's mind was his Cookie.
â
âRose I already said I donât want to come here,â you sighed as your friend dragged you through the crowd of people waiting to get into the show.
â(Y/N) come on, these are your friends! They want you to be here,â she tried to convince you, but you were still skeptical, and it didnât help that you didnât know if you wanted to see Reggie or not right now.
Rose gave you another tug, but you dug your heels into the ground. The girl sighed, giving you a look. âItâs your last day as a Los Feliz high student,â she told you softly. You stiffened at her words, looking down at the floor. âAt least spend it with us. Then, Iâll leave you be. I promise. You donât have to see another gig -better yet, another bass- ever again. Will you do at least that for me?â
You finally glanced up from the ground. âFor you,â you answered begrudgingly.
âWhatâs up Los Feliz High,â Luke said into the mic and was met with cheers.
âWeâre Sunset Curve,â Reggie added. âAnd this is a little something we wrote called I Remember,â
There was a soft opening with Reggieâs bass and Alex on drums, slowly layering in the guitar riff intro before Reggie came close to his mic,
âI remember those nights, stayinâ up late, listeninâ to the radio.
I remember the days, callinâ your name, running to your patio,â
Rose glanced over at you, grinning as you tried to listen to the lyrics, finding a sense of familiarity in the words. Luke and Bobby now joined as backing vocals taking a lower and higher harmony.
âAnd as the years went by slowly you - left my life and I canât, I canât, I canât figure out why, why?â
Alex led to the chorus with a drum fill before the hard rock beat came in, Reggie, Luke, and Bobby really getting into playing to the beat and rhythm, before all coming in again singing the chorus.
âSo tell me, tell me when it all fell apart. Tell me, tell me can we go back to the start.â
The music backing instruments quieted slowly as Reggie leaned into his mic, looking directly at you. Your breath hitched at you finally made eye contact with him. You hadnât bothered to look at him in so long, you wanted to burn the feeling into your memory so you never forget. His eyes glistened with tears as he began to sing,
âTell me, tell me what happened to us Cookie,â
You looked over at Rose who only smiled knowingly as you tried to hide the fact that you were most definitely losing your composure, your heart beating faster and your vision becoming blurry.
âI remember I hurt you, a stain on my heart thatâll never go away. I remember I kissed you, my heart said to stay but my feet ran away.â
They transitioned back to the chorus and you couldnât help but try to push back the lump in your throat as you looked up at your Flicka, singing for you. Reggie took the mic and walked over to you. His hand was stretched out to you, face lighting up in hope. Pushing down all your doubts, you took his hand in yours, squeezing it tight.
âAnd I promise, I promise, I promise Iâll never go away. And I promise I promise, I promise Iâll be there every day. Just tell me, just tell me, just tell me youâll look the other way. Cause if I lost you one more time I donât think that Iâd survive,â
Tears streamed down your face as you listened to the lyrics, each word slowly chipping down the walls you put up around your heart. Reggie leaned in close, removing his hand from yours and placing it on the side of your face, wiping away your stray tears.
âSo tell me, tell me when it all fell apart. Tell me, tell me can we go back to the start.â
The music slowed and quieted one last time, Reggieâs eyes interlocked with yours as he sang the last line,
âTell me, tell me, will you be mine Cookie?â
Silence followed as everyone turned to you, waiting for your answer. You glanced over at Rose, who was just as impatient.
Locking eyes with Reggie, you nodded. âAs long as youâll be mine, Flicka,â you whispered so that only he could hear.
Not waiting any longer, Reggie dropped his microphone, hopping down from the stage and taking both sides of your face and pulling you into a long-awaited kiss. The crowd cheered, but your mind blocked them out.
You missed Reggieâs lips that tasted faintly of that cherry chapstick he always used. You missed feeling his hands against yours, warm and comforting.
You missed your Reggie. But now he was here, and he was never letting you go.
â
âLady Bunny!â Luke cheered, running up to you backstage and pulling you into the tightest squeeze. âI missed you so much,â he whispered and you held him close against you.
âI missed you too, mom,â you sniffled while Luke pressed a friendly kiss to your hair before you were promptly tossed around the group, hugs and all exchanged along with the chatter of
âYouâre gonna stay, right? You canât transfer now,â
All to which the answer was yes, especially when you looked over at Reggie, the brightest smile on his face.
âHey guys can I have a minute alone with Cookie?â he asked and they all complied, moving out of the way of the new couple.
âHave something for me Flicka?â you asked, slight teasing in your voice.
âActually, yeah,â he nodded, fishing out a necklace from his pocket. âI shouldnât have taken it from you. Or told you that you were the problem. You never were, I promise.â
âWater under the bridge,â you smiled shyly. âWhat matters is that youâre here now.â You turned around, allowing him to clip the silver chain around your neck, not without sneaking a quick peck to the corner of your lips after turning you back around.
âPerfect,â he told you, his lips quirking up into a smile. âYouâre perfect.â
âAnd youâre overly cheesy,â you shot back jokingly.
Reggie grasped his chest in feigned hurt. âYou love me, Cookie,â he pouted.
You went on the tips of your toes, kissing him softly. âYeah, Flicka,â you whispered. âI do.â
--
Feedback is always appreciated! Send us an ask to be added to our taglist!Â
@katrina765 @glowstick-lesbian @well-hes-just-too-cute @slytherhoes @notasofti @sunsetcurving @kmsmedine @dxrling-neptune @mystic-writingsâ @lil-lex1 @cookiecakeslive @ifilwtmfc
#julie and the phantoms#jatp#julie and the phantoms fanfiction#julie and the phantoms x reader#jatp fanfiction#jatp x reader#luke patterson#luke patterson x platonic!reader#reggie peters#reggie peters x reader#reggie peters x fem!reader#reggie peters fanfic#reggie peters fic#alex mercer#alex mercer x platonic!reader#alex x willie#willex
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âfate: the winx sagaâ review
im very late to this trend but i finally watched this show all the way through.
if you watch the first episode alone, you probably hated this series, as you should. the first episodeâs dialogue is awkward and stiff. the fatphobia was heavily present. and the outfits sucked. so did i hate the series? not even a little bit.Â
first, and most importantly, lets talk about terra. i saw the most talk around her character and the fatphobia the show exuded. having watched all of it, i can safely say that terra was being bullied. not by her friends, or at least not her real ones, but the classic mean popular clique. any issues she faced with this bullying, her friends stuck up for her but didnât get involved. they knew she could handle it and she did. she was shown sticking up for herself repeatedly. her friends have issues with her at first and iâve seen a lot of people pointing that out as fatphobia. itâs really not as their annoyance of her was from her oversharing and inability to stop talking (relatable). saying that the girls disliked her because sheâs fat is reducing her character to her dress size, something only the audience is seeming to do. she is a fully developed character and so lovable by the end of the first season. but i would love to get into her love life a little more or more into her powers as she is the only one who doesnât struggle with her powers.
musaâs character is well written and fun. her mind powers are interesting and i loved seeing them develop as she learns control. the issues with musa in this series comes from the casting. the actress, elisha applebaum, is white passing but is half-Singaporean. the cartoon design from the original was fully asian. applebaum plays the character so well and is an amazing actress but many say that casting a white passing asian woman to play a fully asian character takes away from the diversity the original show had. as a white self-claimed film critic, i donât think itâs appropriate for me to have an opinion. i did however want to bring it up as itâs being discussed in the criticism of the show.Â
**** this is an edit: itâs been brought to my attention that the actress who plays Musa is fully white and that singapore is not an ethnicity. i saw a few articles say that she was half singaporean and didnât question it (definitely should have researched that) now that i know she is fully white and not mixed, i do have an opinion. what the fuck. the actual fuck. that is so messed up. why would they take a show that was full of diversity in 2005 and make it whiter in 2021??? when i thought she was mixed i didnât want to say anything bc mixed poc constantly get torn between the 1 drop rule where if they have any poc ancestor then they are poc or a minimum percentage of that ethnicity to be considered a ârealâ poc even if they grew up in that culture. i didnât want to tell a half asian girl that she wasnât asian enough but knowing sheâs fully white? yeah that changes a lot of things. in doing more research, she is of middle eastern descent (as am i, still very much white) and if she was cast as stella or even bloom who were classically western europe in the original design, i would be so happy to see extra representation. but not when she took away a part from an asian actress - ESPECIALLY in a time when asian hate crimes are escalating. i donât care if sheâs a great actress and personâŠ..recast her.
idk how many people watched the cartoons but i always hated sky and riven. sky was a much better character in this series. he still struggles with treating the fairies as damsels in distress, which bloom calls him out on. he has more depth and seems like genuinely good guy. riven was....lashing out alot. i liked him in the series because he does acknowledge his fatphobic remarks and ends up admitting to terra that she was a badass while he was struggling with fighting. he begins to work out some of his issues and i loved the dynamic that he has with sky where they get emotional with each other, both more than willing to point out the toxic traits the other has. i look forward to more riven character development. while i like sam, there was way more chemistry in one scene with musa and him. im hoping they keep the enemies to lovers idea that the cartoon had.Â
NOW i need to talk about what i thought could improved. the wings. i loved them, like a lot, but i want at least one more of the girls to get them next season, if not all. it was a fun reveal but wings were such a staple fairy ability in the cartoon that i was nervous they wrote it out. they have the perfect opportunity to fix the outfits with the transformation scene. as we know in the cartoons they girls get new outfits when they transform. theyâre fighting outfits could be so fun or maybe as they develop as fairies they develop different wardrobes. the outfits werenât awful and at 16, most girls arenât wearing skimpy bright colored clothing 24/7 while training. they donât have to be the same as the cartoons but i would love to see terra in vintage 70âČs clothing that works with her curves, stella in at least one glittery outfit, musa in a more pastel grunge look, aisha in matching sweats or some sort of updated street-style look, and bloom is actually fine but maybe more flirty dresses with leather jackets and sneakers, mixing the tough and flirty look more consistently.
also, if youâre new to the fandom, you might not know things like what sky and riven can do, specifically who the specialists are and how they contribute to the fairy world. they struggled slightly with world building as i believe they expected most, if not all, people watching to have an idea of the world already. the show could have done a better job setting up these concepts.
i truly recommend watching the show before you write it off completely.
#fate: the winx saga#fate: the winx club#winx bloom#musa#terra#aisha#stella#fate riven#rusa#miven#sky#netflix#winx#reboot#film review#tv series#fatphobia#please fix the clothing so i can sleep at night#doesnt even have to be slutty#abigail cowen#danny griffin#sadie soverall#jacob dudman#elisha applebaum#freddie thorp#hannah van der westhuysen#eliot salt#precious mustapha#theo graham
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Hell on Earth (TWO) // KOH!TOMHOLLAND X HUMAN!READER
Summary: Tom, Prince of Hell and only heir to the throne, is sent to Earth by his parents as a punishment. He ends up in an odd city full of the worst humans, except one, who, despite not knowing who he truly is, decides to help him.
Note: Well, well, well... Itâs been a while. Iâm sorry but a lot of things happen and honestly I wasnât in the mood to write anything. Anyways, I hope I didnât loose everyone was reading the first part of this Koh!Tom series. Let me know what you thought and if you have ideas for next chapters. And send me an ask to be added to the taglist :) Love you !Â
words: 2.3k
Warnings: panic attack, cursing, fluff-ish?, bad english bc im frenchÂ
First part
Tom was so nervous. How the hell was he going to tell you where he is from. He doesnât have much time to think about it, since you seat in front of him. âHere you goâ you said, placing the tuna sandwich and a cup of coffee before his hands. Seating down, you create a slight draft, giving Tom the chance to breath your smell. Honey and apple. Not too sugary, not too strong but present enough to be under your spell for a spilt second.Â
âThank youâ Tom said taking a bite in the sandwich. The taste of tuna on his tongue repulses him but he fakes a smile ââS really goodâ he lied his mouth full, before swallowing with a hard gulp.Â
âIâm glad you like itâ you smile back laying down a bit, your elbow on the table and your hand in a fist holding your chin. âSo... whatâs going on, Tom ?â the sound of his name on your lips makes it hard for him to concentrate. It almost sounds like a prayer or a blessing, instead of the curse he always heard when his father called him.Â
âRight,â closing his eyes and shaking his head, Tom tried to regain his composure âUm, hereâs the thing. I donât have anywhere to go. My parents kind of kicked me outâ You blinked a few times trying to process what he just said. Youâre surprised and shocked, you didnât expect that at all.Â
âWhat ? W-why ?â you let your hand that was supporting your head, fall on the table, a few inches from his.Â
âUh...â now is the tricky part. Tom has to think fast but coherent. "I was not the best sonâ he confessed. By the confused look on your face, the prince of Hell understood that it wasnât enough of an explanation âI- uh. I didnât take my responsibilities seriously and partied too much. So I fucked up everything.â Tom felt shame thinking about the look on his parentsâ faces before being banned. âBasically, if I want to come back home, I have to change. Like, everything about me must be changedâ Tom let his head fall forward, to avoid your gaze.Â
His head snapped back up when he felt your reassuring hand on his wrist, the veins of his heart loosened at the sight of your compassionate smile.Â
âIâm sure not everything is good to put in the binâ you said softly.Â
âHow would you know ?â Tom almost whispered. âYou donât know meâ
âI can see it. The good.â you replied pointing at his heart. âYouâre just lost. Youâve done some mistakes, what about it ? A few of them doesnât make you a bad person. We're not perfect. Weâre just humans after all.â
âIâm not-â Tom cut himself from dropping his secret. But it hit him. Weâre all humans. Heâs human now. The loss of his powers, the bangs in his head after drinking the whole night away,... His parents made him human. Suddenly, Tom feels a rush of panic invading him. He starts looking around nervously, his palms become clammy and his madness takes control. Fuck, is what being human feels like ? Feeling weak and pathetic ? Succumbing to the unreasonable and to our every perfidious feelings ?Â
âTom ?â you brung him back, your eyebrows furrowed. âIs everything ok ?âÂ
The young boyâs wide opened eyes stare at you, scrutinising every detail of your face. Every stain, every barely formed line and indentation, every curve. Everything and anything that makes you... human.Â
âNo.â he blurbed out, by freeing himself from your hand, which until now had reassured him but now made him feel like a prisoner. âI gotta go...â and with that, Tom stood up abruptly and left the coffee shop.Â
âTom wait !â you tried to stop him, but heâs fast.Â
Tom sets off into the city, looking for a way home at all costs, even though he knows it's impossible. He bumps into things and people who then insult him for not paying attention without apologizing. He wants to cross the street and run away. He gets off the pavement and takes two steps when a van runs into him. Surprised, Tom holds still until a hand grabs his arm and pulls him back, causing him to fall with the person who saved him. It was you. Is she always going to save my life like that ?
Lying next to each other and trying to come to your senses, your breasts rise and fall in rhythm with your twin breaths. You turn your head towards him, the asphalt slightly scratching your scalp. His face is still tense but it hasn't changed. He is still beautiful, elegant, almost mischievous. His curls fall backwards against the ground and you notice the touch of red in his reflections. My God, how beautiful he is.
âDo you often have panic attacks ?â Tom's face gradually relaxes at the sound of your voice. But what frees him from the anxiety monster inside of him, is your laughter. Your sweet giggle. He almost killed you both, but you're laughing. Lying on the floor in the filthy street next to him.Â
âIâm so sorry...âÂ
âDonât beâ you replied getting up. You then hold your hand for him to take it. âCome on, letâs go homeâ you smiled, putting the almost tragic incident that just happened behind you. Tom takes your hand and pushes himself off the ground with your help.Â
âHome ?â he asked confused without letting your hand go.
âYeah, I mean at my place. Youâre going to live there until you... um... change.â you pressed your lips in a tight but friendly smile accompanied by a small puff. Thatâs when he doesnât understand anymore.Â
âWhy are you doing this for me ?â he asks sinking in the back of his chair. âYou donât know me, I could be a sociopath !â or the prince of Hell.Â
âWell, First of all I donât think that sociopaths know they are socipaths. And when they do, I also donât think itâs something they want to scream everywhere.â you replied standing in front of him, your fists of your hips. âAnd two: Itâs you who came to my shop and ask for my help. And itâs not like you have somewhere to crash, donât you ?â you titled your head to the side as if you were playfully challenging him. Tom grinned a little, trying to hide his hint of embarrassment âBut if you prefer, we can always find you a piece of cardboard that we will set you up in a not too badly famed alleyway, you'll love it, itâs-â
âOk, alright you won !â Tom cut you placing his palms in defeat. âHell, are you always like that ?â he chuckled. You just smiled cheekily and shrugged your shoulders. You took his arm and started walking.Â
You didnât live far from the bakery, only 10 minutes walking, which was very pratical since, before going to the bakery, you followed classes at university and had to go change at your place before going to work. You led Tom to your appartment. The building was far from the ivory towers in which Tom had grown up. Yours was much more dilapidated, with a cold cigarette smell in the stairwell that you asked him not to pay attention to. Ms. McDougall had never learned good manners, and enjoyed smoking in the small lobby.Â
After going up the three floors without a lift, of course, you stop in front of the door of your flat to open it. âI wasnât expecting someone today, so please forgive me for the old tea cups in the kitchen... and the living. And probably in the bathroom.â
âThe bathroom ?â repeated Tom.Â
âYeah. Donât ask. I donât have any excuseâ you chuckled finding your keays at the bottom of your bag. âOk. Here you go !â you invited him in with your arm extended so he can enter first. Tom thanked you before walking in, discovering your small but cozy place.Â
There was a main room which served as kitchen, dining room and living room. The black sofa in front of the television looked comfortable and could be folded out to make a bed. There was also a coffee table with books for the university, the remote control, chocolates, a cherry blossom scented candle and two mugs. A garland of light framed the window overlooking the street. The neighbourhood was not pretty, but at least it was quiet. Just like the flat which was very cozy. Tom already felt good there.Â
You took off your jacket and your bag and started to tidy up the room quickly. Tom looked at you with an amused smile. He looked how a few strands of hair fell on your face as you pick up the mugs out of the table and put them in the sink; and how your hands worked quickly to collect your books.Â
âWhat do you study ?â Tom asked pointing to your books that you held close to your chest.Â
âI am studying to become a nurseâ you responded with a soft smile. âMy finals are in three weeks.âÂ
âOh, thatâs a noble jobâ said Tom, immediatly regreting sounding condescendin. âI mean, itâs a great one ! Better than selling sandwiches and croissants.â When he saw your lips thightening and your eyes squinting, he held his hands in front of you, trying to catch back his mistake âNo, I mean, working in a bakery is great, itâs just... being a nurse is better for you !âÂ
âHow would you know whatâs better for me ?â you teased. Tom felt his palms sweating and his cheeks redenning. You got him.Â
Why does he react like that ? He was prince of Hell, and soon - hopefully - king, for fuckâs sake ! Heâs used to people being affraid of him and his powers. Used to spill his venom on any creature, human or not, using harsh, insulting and degrading names, without the shadow of an ounce of embarrassment. That's what he did. To be the cursed prince of Hell. The beloved child of death and eternal torture.Â
But with you itâs different. You are different. He feels deeply in his soul, that he would never use these words on you. You had a force on him that he couldnât explain.Â
âI-I... I donât, yeah youâre right. Sorry, I didnât want to-â he stopped when he heard your light giggle.Â
âTom, I was joking. I understood what you meant, I just wanted to mess you with. Selling sandwiches is great but it isnât my professional perspective. Sorry for making you uncomfortable, that was dumb.â
âNo, no, no ! Itâs fine. Itâs just a joke.â he puffed. What ?! In Hell, he would have sent the fool who dared messing up with him, in the worst session of torture of his entire eternity.Â
You smiled to him before heading to your bedroom, throwing your books on your bed. You came back with a blanket and a very soft looking pillow. You then walked to the bathroom with a new toothbrush and clean towel.Â
âMy brother lived here for a while a couple of years ago and left clothes. You can take whatever you want, heâs not gonna come back.âÂ
âWhere is he now ?â you felt a hiver running through your body at the thought of him.Â
âI donât know. Aaron never felt like he belongged in this society, that he had nothing to bring to the community. So he wanted to join the army. They know how to talk to kids who feel like him. Telling them that their lives will save thousands of others. I told him it would be the biggest mistake of his life, that heâs smart and talented but he didnât want to hear anything. So he left one day, and I never saw him again.â It was the first time you talked about your brother in two years. You felt tears threatening to fall. âI donât even know if heâs still alive.â you choked on the last word, unable to bear the very idea that he may no longer be of this world.Â
Tom looked at you not knowing what to do. He tried to remember an Aaron who would have gone to hell. The Prince has the ability to know all the deaths that fall and the division of souls between heaven and hell. This means that he knows every name, story and sin that enters his kingdom. Unfortunately, without his powers on Earth, he cannot know whether his brother is alive or not.Â
âY/N, Iâm sorry,â he murmured before clearing his throat. âIâm sure heâll come back one day.â You raised your head with a heart-rending smile, trying hard to hide your pain.Â
âHeâs in the past now. Letâs talk about something else.â You entered the kitchen, looking for something to eat, but you forgot to go to the grocery store today. Well, you didnât really forgot, your plans just... changed a bit. âUm... I have nothing in my fridge and clearly I donât want to grocery shopping right now, so is chinese take away is fine with you ?âÂ
âPerfect !â He never ate chinese food.Â
âGreat ! Iâll just call my favorite place after taking a showerâ you said walking backwards to your bathroom.Â
When Tom heard the water running, he fell on the couch dramtically. His legs spread and his right hand on his forhand he stared into the void, trying to process what happened those two last days. Him being banned from Hell for an indefinite period almost dead two times on the road, loosing his powers, and ending up living in an girlâs appartment. Tom sighed loudly, wondering how all of this could happen to the fucking prince of Hell.Â
And now what ?Â
________________________________________________________________
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Can you do 60 for indruck, NSFW? Thank you so much! Love your work!
Here it is! I set it in the same world as this sternclay fill. Credit to @bellafarallones for playing in this space on discord. Apollo is from my Super hero AU
âAll Iâm sayin is it seems mighty unfair to me that one fella gets a handler-assistant type deal and the rest of us donât.â Duck crosses his arms as Ned fiddles with the pen on his desk.
âYouâre not wrong, dear boy, but Apollo was in high demand from the higher ups-â
âBecause heâs a shallow dipshit with a mean streak whoâll be good for ratings?â
âPrecisely. He demanded in his contract that we allow his twin to continue his work as his photographer and assistant. He has over a million followers on Instagram, so those photos will be a boost to the show. Just try to get along for the cameraâs?â
âHis brother ainât even on camera.â Duck mutters.
âI meant with Apollo.â
Duck shrugs, defeated, âsure thing, Ned.â
As he walks back to the main house, he mulls over the fact that the twin (Indrid, he thinks thatâs the guys name) bugs him more than Apollo does. Apollo is vain, mean, and selfish, but at least that gets him things, even makes sense for the kind of show theyâre on. Indrid gains nothing by helping him out here. Except protection from the bully, which Duck finds to be the worst kind of cowardice. Hopefully Vincent, this seasonâs bachelor, will see through the âinfluencerâ and send him packing ASAP.
-------------------------------------
Four weeks in, and this is exactly what Duck was worried about. Not only is Indrid hovering around his brother like a nervous moth (excet when cameras are near, at which point he ducks out of frame), heâs doing fucking nothing to reign him in.
A few frontrunners are starting to emerge, and with that claws are coming out. Barclay, a chef and all around nice guy, is the target of choice. Nico and Josh both took bites out of him this morning. But Apollo sunk his teeth in like a dog on a fox, calling him, among other things, a pathetic, six-foot puppy dog who no man would ever want. The cook left noticeably teary eyed. Duck was about to block the cameras from following when Joseph beat him to it. Which is weird, because he thought Joe couldnât stand Barclay. Apollo flounces off, but Duck corners Indrid where heâs been stoically watching his brother be a raging asshole.
âWhat the fuck man?â
âWrong twin.â Indrid says flatly, indicating his silver hair, tied back in a half-bun. His dark roots are showing and his eyebrows are black, unlike Apolloâs immaculate blonde dye job and bleached brows.
âNope, right one. Youâre his handler, cantâ you fuckin intervene when heâs doinâ shit like that? Or are you just here to let him hurt whoever he feels like?â
Indrid fixes him with a bitter smile, âIf there were a way to make my brother be kind or, indeed, see others as people, donât you think Iâd have found it and used it everyday since?â
âI-â
âYou people have no idea how much Iâm already doing. I kept him from going after you yesterday by reminding him he looks ugly when he yells on camera. And if nothing else console yourself with the fact you all have only to deal with him for a few months. Some of us have endured twenty-eight years of it.â
With that, he turns and stalks from the room. As he leaves, Duck canât shake the thought that his black denim jacket and worn jeans fit him better than Apolloâs designer ones ever could.
-----------------------------------
Indrid understands why thereâs so much alcohol on set, but he canât partake (too bitter) and it makes Apollo even harder to handle than usual. Which is why Indrid is out on the grounds at ten p.m, intending to hide from his brother until dawn.
At six weeks in, fan favorites are getting more established and Indrid, needing to predict Apolloâs mood in order to do his job, is keeping a close eye on them. His twin is well-liked for being snarky and hot, though he suspects the large number of contestants means there have been limited chances for his unpleasant side to be showcased. Joseph is another, because of course he is, movie-star handsome with an interesting past. Barclay is beloved for the very things that the other contestants torment him for. And Duck? Duck is quickly becoming the one people think Vincent will choose.
Indrid thinks theyâre right. Heâs charming in an understated way, funny, and while Apollo needles him for his âdad bod,â Indrid and Vincent have both noticed the muscles in his arms. Who gives a damn about flat abs? Indrid would much rather have something soft to rest his head on while those green eyes look lovingly down at him. His crush on Duck is useless, persistent, and must be hidden from Apollo at all costs.
His foot catches something solid and he tumbles over the obstacle to land ass-first on the lawn.
âOw.â He glares at the object. The object turns out to be Duck Newton, who's obviously drunk as he sits up.
âSorry man, thought no oneâd come out here. Oh itâs you, it's, uh, fuck, fuck c'monâ he snaps his fingers as he searches his thoughts, âIt's cute Apollo!â
âIndrid.â Surely Duck didnât mean to use that adjective. Right?
âNo, Iâm Duck?â
He snickers, âNo, I meant Iâm Indrid.â
âOhhh, right. You're Indrid. I'm Duck. That's the big dipperâ He points at the sky. Indrid follows the line and grins, delighted.â
âIt is!â
âUhhuh. C'mere, can show you more.â Duck pats the spot beside him and lays back. Indrid scoots closer and reclines as well, making appreciative sounds each time Duck shows him a constellation.
As theyâre studying the sky, the other man whispers, âCan I tell you a secret? I, I think Joeân Barclay are into each other now."
âThe way they look at each other is not exactly subtle.â
ââHeh, yeah.â he links his hands across his belly, âI think they're in love. You ever been in love?â
âNo.â He sighs, not wanting to dwell on that pile of baggage, âYou?â
âNope. And, uh, donât, donât tell anyone but I don't think I am with Vincent. Maybe I could be? Does that make me a bad person? He's nice, think he likes me a lot but, I, I dunno.â
âNot being in love with someone doesnât make you a bad person. No more than loving someone does.â
Indrid is hard to surprise; years of getting out ahead of his brother and father taught him how to see things coming. But nothing could prepare him for Duck rolling to hide his face against Indridâs chest. Not knowing what else to do, he pats his back, notices a woodsy scent tingling his nose.
âYou smell good.â He winces; that was too creepy, now Duck will pull the comforting bulk of his body away.
âThanks. I bought a bunch of cologne when I realized I was actually going to be a contestant. News clothes too. Thought it would give me an edge but...I dunno, can't compete with a guy like your brother.â
âJoin the club.â Indrid reaches up to toy with a lock of Duckâs black hair, expecting Duck to bat him away. Instead, he sighs and turns his head to give Indrid better access.
âYou could compete with âim. You're cuter. Nicer too.â
âOh. Ah. Thank you.â
Duckâs fidgets with the mothman pin on Indridâs jacket, âYou wanna cuddle?â
âI beg your pardon?â
âNo one cuddles with me. And we ainât allowed to cuddle Vincent yet.â He looks up, lips pouting just enough to be charming.
Indrid letâs a purr enter his voice, âThatâs a shame. Iâm happy to cuddle.â
Duck rolls more of his body onto Indrid, resolutely nestling his head under his chin and tangling their legs together. His hands stay on Indridâs chest and shoulders, though heâs now drunkenly petting Indridâs collarbone, making him shiver. He expends four months worth of daring in a second, wrapping his arms around the curves of Duckâs torso. When Duckâs fingers brush skin instead of shirt, Indrid whimpers, then bites his lip and prays it went unnoticed.
âYou donât get cuddled much either, do you?â Duck murmurs thoughtfully.
âNo.â
âDamn shame, youâre real good at it. Can cuddle me any time.â
Indrid âmmhmmsâ knowing the promise is like the stars; bright and comforting in the darkness, but ultimately beyond his reach.
Three day later, he drops his guard; Apolloâs been on his good behavior since Vincentâs been spending more time with him. Youâd think Indrid would learn by now that all his venom has to go somewhere.
Heâs huddled down in the rec room trying not to cry; itâs pathetic enough that he let such childish insults get to him, but to cry over them would confirm everything his brother said.
âIndrid? You, uh, you okay?â Duckâs reflection in the darkened T.V approaches his own.
âI'm fine.â Itâs the same inflection heâs used hundreds of times, but Duck sits down on the couch all the same.
âDo you, uh, need a hug?â
âNo.â He replies a hair too quickly.
âDo you want one?â
â......Badly.â
Duck opens his arms and Indrid shifts on the cushions, doing his best to curl his long limbs so theyâll fit in his embrace. The shorter man notices, concern flashing on his face.
âYou wanna talk about it?â
âNot particularly.â
âOkay. You, uh, wanna hear the most exciting news of the day?â He waits for Indrid to nod, âthere was a cougar sightinâ in the foothills near here!â
âThat is both very exciting and alarming.â
âDoubt itâd go after folks, they try to steer clear of people. We donât have âem back home, but you learn what to do when youâre also learnin how to deal with bears.â
âHow does one deal with a bear? Other than buying them a drink.â
Duck snorts, relaxes further into the couch, âDepends on how soon you see âemâŠâ
They emerge two hours later, and Indrid is so engrossed in their conversation about hiking incidents that he runs smack into a camera man. While heâs apologizing profusely, Duck guffaws, steadies him, and leads him off in search of somewhere to watch the sunset.
-----------------------------------------
âOooh, ooh, look, sea lions!â Indrid points to the distant wharf.
âGood eye. Man, those fuckers are big. Glad none of âem were in the water when we did that fuckin cliff dive.â
âI for one would pay good money to see my brother chased by a sea lion.â
Duck chuckles, pops the tab on his WhiteClaw. Theyâre having dinner on the beach, a gourmet spread meant to encourage them to show off their pallets. Indrid took Barclayâs recommendation and ordered the whole, grilled snapper, which he assumed heâd be eating alone; Vincentâs attention has been on Duck ever since he went swimming this morning. Duck seems to be enjoying it, but come dinner time he demurred (âgotta let some of the other fellas have a chanceâ) and brought his basket of fried oysters over to join Indrid on the sand.
âSpeakin of your brother, kinda surprised he didn't make any digs at this whole, uh, situation.â Duck gestures to the torso Indrid is currently aching to lick droplets of saltwater from. To subdue the craving, he licks salt from his fingers before replying.
âI, ah, the last time he tried to, I reminded him of all the pictures I have of him eating. He hates to be seen eating. Most of the time.â He tilts his head towards his twin, whoâs chowing down next to Vincent without a care for the cameras. Indrid sets his hand on the warm sand, âIâve been trying to, well, reign him in as you suggested. Or at least make him think twice about his choices.â
(Indrid omits the part where heâs most likely to risk it if Duck is the one with the target on his back).
Duck sets his hand down beside Indridâs, brushes sand from the side of it with a calloused thumb, âMighty good of you. But, uh, think I mighta read things wrong that day. You gotta handle him how you think best. Just, uh, just promise me you wonât sacrifice your own well-beinâ for my sake, or anyone elseâs. Weâre all grown-ass men; we can handle it.â
âI promise.â He lies.
The other man leans back on his hands, green eyes drifting across the waves. Indrid would gladly sit in silence the rest of the night, itâs so easy to be comfortable in the lull when itâs Duck filling the space beside him.
Eventually, the ranger murmurs, âItâs so fuckin breathtaking. The ocean, I mean. Maybe if you live on a coast you get used to it but man, it is somethin;.â
âMore so than the forest?â
Duck smiles, âItâs like apples and oranges. Monongahela got its own charms; youâd have a blast takin pictures and drawin there, believe me. If, uh, if Apollo and I both make it to the final four, uh, maybe we could take a few hours durinâ my hometown visit and I could show you my favorite spot.
Indrid imagines the two of them beneath the trees, walking hand in hand.
âIâd like that.â
---------------------------------------------
âYou know youâre just a distraction, right?â
Indrid doesnât look at his brother, just flips the page in his book, âI doubt that. Youâve said, often, that Iâm too off-putting to be interesting.â
âNot when thereâs competition for someone superior; Duck knows he might not win. Youâre his back-up if he doesnât, and a way to kill time until the end. Once Vincent sends him home, which he most definitely will, heâll keep you around until something better comes along.â
âDonât act like you know him.â Indrid hisses, looking up just in time to see something scurrying behind the triumph on Apolloâs face: fear.
So, his brother has a new weakness. Heâll tuck that away for later; this is shaping up to be an unpleasant conversation, but not one requiring quite that degree of weapon.
âYou should thank me. If I werenât so captivating, Vincent would spend all his time with Duck. Then youâd be without any attention at all. Even Duckâs taste isnât that abysmal.â He grins his several thousand dollar smile, âhe and Vincent are probably laughing about it right now.â
Indrid stands, crosses the tiny room, âShut up, Apollo.â
Then he slams the door. Thereâs a yelp, followed by âyou hit my nose, you pathetic excuse for a man, ow, open this door this instant Iâm not done with you!â
He flicks the lock and sits back on the bed. Thereâs a tin of sensory putty on his nightstand and he opens it, playing with it between his fingers. Duck brought it for him after a museum date with Vincent. The image of him not only thinking of Indrid when he saw something, but then buying it for him just to see him smile makes him want to grin and hide his face in a pillow like a teenager who just got asked to prom.
But maybe this date is going differently.
Indrid squeezes the putty, repeats the mantra heâs had since he was a child, âApollo always lies. Apollo always lies.â
Eventually, heâs calm enough to work on some tattoo commissions, is coloring away when thereâs a knock on the door. A secret knock Duck invented as a goof. Throwing open the door reveals the shorter man wearing a suit jacket and an exhausted expression. Indrid gestures to the bed, shuts and locks the door as Duck slumps on the mattress and sets his head in his hands.
âWhelp, that was a shit-show.â
âWhat happened?â Indrid sits cross-legged beside him.
âVincent went in for a kiss and I, uh, I turned him down. I mean, he took it well because heâs a sweet guy but I, I feel like shit.â
âThereâs no shame in not wanting to kiss just yet.â
âThat ainât the problem. I, I wanna kiss someone on this set, but it ainât him. Indridâ he looks up, green eyes watery, âIndrid, I think Iâm fallin in love with you.â
âOh. I, are you sure-â
âThe whole night, and I mean the whole fuckin night, I was thinkin about you. Thought how nice the trip to the botanical gardens would be with you there to point out color combos and get excited about butterflies. Wanted to hold your hand over dinner. Fuck, when they brought out the dessert menu all I could think was how fun itâd be to order one of each thing to surprise you so youâd do that thing you do with your hands when youâre real excited.â Duck turns, sets his hands on Indridâs shoulders, ââDrid, if you donât want this, Iâll back off but-â
Indrid cuts him off with a kiss, letâs strong arms pull him down to the bed and presses as close to Duck as he can, as if any space between them might be a way for the universe to push them apart.
âThan fuckâ Duck pants, cupping his face, âwait, fuck, what do we do now? I canât string poor Vincent on.â
âWeâll get them to let you out of your contract. It canât be that hard, right?â
--------------------------------------------
âAbsolutely notâ Ned shakes his head, âdropping out of the show is out of the question.â
âBut that ainât fair to any of us. Can we at least tell Vincent the truth?â
âNo, it needs to look as if he naturally decided not to choose you. If not, we could be accused of manipulating results; the last time that happened, the ratings tanked for that season and the next. And my predecessor was fired.â
Duck looks at Indrid, âGuess Iâll just...pull back? That way Vincent wonât have a reason to choose me andâll let me go soon.â
----------------------------------------------
âDroppin out is outta the question, huh?â Duck mutters to Indrid as they watch Barclay and Joseph walk off holding hands, the host eagerly asking them questions as they go.
âI suppose he didnât drop so much as sprint.â Indrid glances at the rose in Duckâs hand, âcongratulations on making the final...well, final three now.â
âThanks? Guess Apolloâs pretty happy about it too.â
âYes, but his ego needs no stroking.â Indrid smiles, âmaybe this means youâll get to show me the woods?â
âI hope so. Huh. What are they gonna do with the rest of us when itâs not our turn for the hometown visit?â
The answer turns out to be: drag everyone to each hometown. Because they no longer have Joeâs trip to do, Ned decided they needed more scenes of the contestants exploring where their competitors came from.
Kepler is first, and tonight is the night Duckâs been dreading. His romantic, home-town date that everyone expects to end with at least some kissing. He manages to make it through dinner, even enjoys showing Vincent the down-town he spent years roaming. But as they start down the river walk for a romantic stroll, his heart is trying to smash its way out of his ribs.
âItâs alright, you know.â Vincent stops, guiding Duck to face him, âthe fact you want to be with Indrid.â
âI, uh, fuck, I, I donât not know, uh, fuck-â he closes his eyes, âhowâd you know?â
âIâm more observant than I get credit for.â Vincent brushes his cheek, âIâve had a hunch for weeks now, but I kept you around because I liked having you here, even if I suspected it wasnât going to end with us together. Iâm very fond of you, Duck. You deserve someone who makes you happy. I promise Iâll send you home this next rose ceremonyâ
âChristâ Duck chuckles, âyouâre a hell of a guy too, Vince. I hope whoever you pick treats you right. I, uh, can I, should weâŠ?â
Vincent plants a chaste kiss on his cheek, then smiles, âgo get him.â
----------------------------------------
âAny twos?â
âNo. Go fish.â
Apollo grumbles as he takes another card. Given Duck and Vincent are on their date, neither he nor Indrid is having a good night. Before Indrid can make his ask, his twin says, âHow do you get people to like you?â
âWhy do you care? Youâve made it this far, so obviously Vincent likes you a great dealâ
âI donât just mean him. I, I mean, I want him to like me. To want me. But I suspect heâd like me better if other people did.â
Indrid idly taps his cards, âI suggest you stop acting like our father.â
âIâm nothing like him!â Apollo squawks.
âOh, but you are. Everything he taught us you still hold as true; youâre just the newest version of men like him. Self-absorbed. Cruel. Shallow. Iâm amazed youâve gotten this far with Vincent, given that the age difference means youâd be caring for him in his old age.â
âI, I can care for him. I will!â
âApollo, I wouldnât trust you to care for a potted plant.â He sets his cards down.
âAt least Iâm not a-â
âAmbitionless deviant who has to ride his brotherâs coattails to survive?â
âWha--how-â
âLike I said; youâre just like him. Down to your insults.â Indrid stands, âIâm going to bed. I suggest you do the same.â
His brother remains speechless--a rare state for him--as he closes the door and heads for his room. He doubts Duck will do anything on the date (hell, the two of them have only been able to steal some kisses now and then), but the whole charade has him feeling low.
There are far more cameras in the rented house than there were a few hours ago. Which means the rest of the crew is back. Does that also meanâŠ
âHey, sugar. I was just lookin for you.â
--------------------------------------------------
Duckâs glad his door is open, because otherwise Indrid would have smashed it to pieces dragging them both through it. Heâd only gotten out the barest explanation before the taller man was kissing his face and tugging at his clothes, purring âmineâ over and over again.
âYep, all yours.â He shuts the door as Indrid mouths at his neck, âwhich also means youâre all mine.â He yanks Indridâs black sweater up and over his head, sends the matching t-shirt after it a moment later. Indrid whines, fumbling with Duckâs dress shirt, and he gets an idea.
âUh uh, only good boys who show me why they deserve it get to feel me up.â
Indrid groans into his shoulder, fisting the fabric of his jacket âWhat constitutes good behavior in this instance?â
âOne sec, donât go nowhere.â He starts to step past him, pauses to grips his chin and pull him into another kiss, âand no peekin.â
As he digs through his bag for the strap on he brought just in case, he keeps an eye on Indrid to be sure heâs following the directions. The taller manâs fingers twitch, but his head stays still. God, Duck is going to memorize the shape of each of the tattoos decorating his skin with his mouth.
âYou did real good.â He slips around Indrid once more, resting his back on the wall. Indrid notices the new bulge in his pants and thuds to his knees.
âMay I?â
âYou better.â
Indrid undoes the button of his fly. Then he looks at Duck over the rim of his glasses as he takes the zipper between his teeth and pulls it down. When the black silicone of the strap breaks free, Indrid cocks his head as if unsure of his options. Duck doesnât really have a plan--he just wants to be with him, to make him feel good and show him just what weeks of pent-up desire have done to him--but heâs starting to regret that choice.
Indrid flicks hair from his face and wraps his lips around the head of the cock experimentally. He hums, sucking on it a moment, then pulls back blushing, âThis is going to sound strange but, ah, I, I really like that. Itâs such a lovely texture on my tongue, itâs, itâs almost soothing to suck.â
âGuess you better keep suckin it then, huh?â Duck runs the fingers of his right hand through Indridâs hair.
âIs that really alright? It canât feel like much on your end.â
âDonât mean it ainât fun to watch. But, uhâ he touches the edge of Indridâs red glasses, âit okay if I take these off?â
Indrid nods and Duck slides them free, tucks them into his breast pocket for safekeeping as Indrid draws the cock into his mouth again. He focuses on the head at first, humming and moaning as it bumps his cheek. Then Duck sees him swallow and relax the muscles of his jaw as he presses closer. Little puffs of breath tickle Duckâs skin as Indrid gets most of the cock in his mouth, cheeks hollowing and head bobbing as he sucks. Hungry noises burlbe up his throat, and the more he lets himself go the messier he becomes, spit coating his lips and eyes fluttering closed in bliss.
âOkay, I lied.â
Brown eyes shoot him a disbelieving look.
âThis ainât fun. This is one of the hottest fuckin things Iâve ever seen.â
Indrid wiggles happily on his knees, left hand dropping to rubs his own cock through his jeans.
âNeedy little thing, gotta have somethin down your throat and around your dick at the same time.â
âMMMhhmmmâ Indrid purrs, the picture of filthy perfection.
âIf, if you swallow the whole thing, Iâll let you finger-fuck me.â
Both hands fly to his thighs with an excited moan. Indridâs brow crinkles with determination as he slowly, carefully brings his lips to the base of the toy. Duck groans out âgood boyâ and shoves his pants down, Indrid helping to drag them to his ankles. Indrid keeps his left hand on Duckâs hip while the right hovers below his folds. Duck takes it, the toy making the angle a bit awkward, and guides it against him.
âStart with one.â
Indrid nods, moans reverently as he obeys. Duck curses, looks down to find Indrid watching him attentively. Duck is going to wreck him. Then heâs going to cuddle him to sleep and wonder at the fact he got this lucky.
âYouâre doinâ great, sugar. Promise Iâll tell you if you need to adjustOH, ohyeahâ he lets his head rest against the chipped white of the door, âthatâs the spot. Fuck it, add one more, Ahfuck, yeah, those artists fingers are fuckin perfect for this.â
Another purr and then a sharp, choked noise. Duck looks down, realizing he rolled his hips without meaning to. Before he can apologize, Indrid grips his thigh and shakes his head.
âYou like that?â
âMmhhmmmâ Indrid traces a heart on his belly.
âYouâll pull off you need to?â
âMhmmmm.â Indrid curls his fingers as his stretched lips manage to grin.
âFuck!â Duck giggles, âokay, if my darlin wants his face fucked, thatâs what heâll get.â He keeps a hand on Indridâs shoulder as he lets loose, grunts and curses mingling with the increasingly wet moans of his cock claiming Indridâs throat. Soon heâs out of words, too busy with the sight of himself forcing Indridâs lips apart as he tightens around his fingers. Handjobs are a toss-up for him most days; sometimes they work, other times he canât cum from them at all. It turns out what makes it very easy to do so is-
ââDrid, fuck, fuck, sugar, yeah, right there, rightthererightthere ohfuckyeah.â He cums, jerking his hips hard enough to punch a new, high sound from Indridâs throat. The other man pulls off, rests his cheek on Duckâs belly with shuddery, satisfied sighs.
âYâknowâ Duck unbuttons his shirt from the bottom up so Indrid can more easily nuzzle the skin there, âI had this whole plan where I was gonna fuck you with this and then ride your face to cum.â
âIâm not opposed.â Indrid grins, bouncing a bit.
âYeah, but Iâve only got one in me tonight. Soâ He tosses the shirt away, pulls off the harness as Indrid nibbles his hips, âif you wanna cum, youâre gonna have to do all the work.â
An edge enters his smile, âI can manage that.â
Duck hits the floor with a whump, Indrid trapping him on his back and climbing atop him, all the while kissing him with abandon.
âMay I fuck you?â
âHell yeah.â
âCondom?â
âDop kit, bathroom, aw come back.â
âPatience, sweetheartâ Indrid blows him a kiss, returns a few moments later doing an inelegant dance to kick his jeans and boxers away, âgot one!â
âGood, now get back down here before I-AHfuck!â Indrid is on him and in him so fast it knocks his breath away.
âBefore what? Youâre not going anywhere, youâre mine, alllllll mine.â He drags kisses across Duckâs cheek, then bites his chapped lip as he looks down at him, âright?â
âYou know it, nnng, fuck, thatâs it sugar, be a good boy and cum for me. Fuck, darlin, wanted this so bad.â He locks his fingers into silver hair to keep Indrid in kissing distance as the other man whimpers, thrusts shallow and rabbity.
âWant you too, so much, Iâll be worth it, I swear, Iâll be good, Iâll, Iâll make you so happy.â
Duck rests their foreheads together, âYou already do.â
Thereâs a high, gasping moan, almost like a chirp, and Indrid rides out his orgasm in drawn-out rolls of his hips. Then he collapses, laughing, on Duckâs chest.
âI, Iâm sorry, I just never thought Iâd get this. Someone wanting me. Choosing me.â
âI mean, I went on a T.V show to find love, so I know a little somethin about that fear. But I also know findin you is better than anythin I ever imagined.â
âLikewise.â Indrid nestles closer, one hand reaching out to hold Duckâs where itâs flopped on the rug.
â...You realize this means thereâs a fifty-fifty chance your brother will win.â
Indrid shrugs, lifts his head to smile at Duck, âI leave that to Vincent. I already got my prize.â
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