#this got really long and ranty.

[http-byler]

okay listen. I spent like 40 minutes ranting about this to someone who could care less TODAY so I feel like I gotta put it on here too bc at least you guys will care…

Mike was SO outta pocket with that snide little “she didn’t look fine” comment and I think it speaks to all the relationship problems between him & El. and to preface, I am a Mike defender til I die so this doesn’t come from a place of Mike hate/slander. that comment was just so unnecessary and petty in its delivery.

you can tell that it was just him being upset about El lying to him and not about Angela because even Will gives him a look like “wtf are you doing”. everyone else is trying to make El feel better because they know her and they know she needed that reassurance. and I’m not convinced that Mike doesn’t know the gravity of the situation for El. he JUST saw the horrific bullying she’s had to deal with and Will told him that it’s been going on the entire time. so it’s completely hypocritical of him to praise her for humiliating Troy, and even going as far as to break his arm, for bullying Mike & Dustin. why is it okay for her to use violence to stand up to his bullies, but not her own?

he knows the answer and we all know the answer. he’s just upset that she lied to him! because now he’s like, embarrassed and everything he thought he knew just, wasn’t true. his relationship for the past six months has been solely through letter correspondence, and he’s just found out that all of it was fake (or at least, that’s the extreme I think his dramatic ass would take it too). Friends Don’t Lie. that’s one of, if not, the first things he told El about friendships. and yet, in s3 he’s the one to lie to her! so again, were at a stand still because he’s mad at El for something he allows himself to do.

ultimately, what I took away from that comment and their subsequent fight scene is that they love each other, just not the way that they feel like they should.

El’s basis for relationships is based on fantasy. she learned about romantic relationships from tv shows and movies, never learning what a real relationship should be like! Mike’s basis for relationships is his parents’ marriage and his friends’ parents marriage (as well as entertainment media). we can see just how little he knows about relationships throughout s3 when Lucas has to walk him through every single aspect of it, even the concept of an “olive branch”. and honestly, it’s not bad or wrong of them to not have a good level of understanding about romantic relationships! they’re kids! even Lucas and Max, who are established as the couple who does understand romantic relationships, get it wrong sometimes.

because they don’t have a grasp on what makes a romantic relationship work, they end up jeopardizing their platonic relationship as well! because I believe they do love each other, I just think it’s platonic! they’ve been through so much together, and I think a lot of Mike’s feelings that he believes are romantic are actually just a feeling of relief that she’s still there. he watched her “die” and he had to deal with the grief of her death for a year. having her back, that feeling of joy at her being alive and the fear of losing her again, it’s all such strong emotions! emotions one could mistake for romantic feelings. especially in a time where men and women were expected to date and not “just be friends”.

as for El, she might have romantic feelings for Mike. it’s hard to tell sometimes if she really feels the love for him she says she does, or if that’s just her going through the motions of what she has seen portrayed. because in season one, Mike is the one to kiss her, and she is understandably surprised by this (though not upset by it). but then she disappears for a year and in that time she watches movies and shows about romance. they teach her what that kiss means and how she should act with someone she likes romantically. so when they meet again in s2, she leans in as well and this time, she knows what she’s supposed to do. and I don’t doubt that she feels differently about Mike than she does about the rest of the party members. he was the one to take her in and he was kind to her and respected her before the other boys were/did. it makes sense that their relationship is set apart from the rest of the party. but that doesn’t make it inherently romantic.

their fundamental relationship problem stems from not knowing each other. they love each other so much, and they would (they have) risked their lives for each other. But! they don’t really know anything about each other and don’t necessarily share the same interests. El doesn’t know that much about Mike as a person, but she still knows a hell of a lot more about him than he does about her. she doesn’t know that much about herself.

s3 showed us just how much of her life revolves around the men in it (hop, brenner, mike). Max was integral to El’s storyline for an abundance of reasons but the s3 storyline has got to be the most important. she’s the first person to tell her that she is her own person and that she can make her own decisions about who she is. and we’ve seen her smile and laugh a couple times in the show, but that montage was the most fun we’ve seen El have ever in the show. nothing dampens the mood and she’s learning what SHE likes and who SHE is outside of the box she’s been shoved into her whole life. and it’s only for a day. then reality sets back in and she’s sudden thrust into the role of protector again. that silly, happy, pre-teen girl we just saw is gone in a flash. she’s still figuring out who she is and it’s impossible for Mike to know her if she doesn’t know herself.

in the place of knowing each other well, they put each other on this unreachable pedestal that makes them feel inferior in their own relationship. El is “Superman” to Mike. he believes that he’s “just some random nerd” and that he got lucky that he found El. he has no idea how harmful that ideology is to her and to himself. and he hasn’t even really learned his lesson. he put her on a pedestal and was upset when she fell. and yet, he puts her right back up there, expecting a different result. she doesn’t want to be some superhero, she wants to be a normal teenage girl, she wants to be someone outside of the powers she had/has. and she reminds him that she’s not a “superhero”, as least not anymore, but in the Van he expresses the same sentiment to Will because he thinks so highly of her anyway. he bases so much of his self worth on being needed and helpful that his self esteem is practically on the damn floor. it makes it impossible for him to connect with her about insecurities because he feels like his are true and hers aren’t. he IS some random nerd and she’s NOT scary or abnormal.

now El, she sees mike as this, righteous guy who is so good in his heart that he’d never do the things she’s done. she’s put him on a pedestal as well, though it’s not as dramatic as Mike’s. she wants to impress him, make him like her more because he is good. hop is gone and brenner was literally her abuser, all she has now is Mike and she wants his validation. she wants him to believe everything is going great and that she is normal and good and everything she think he is. she doesn’t want to be spiteful or angry or violent or bad. she doesn’t want to be feared. and Mike was the first person to make her feel that way. he’s one of the only people that can still make her feel that way (besides the Byers now probably). so telling him those lies made her feel like she could still be normal. as long as Mike believes it, then maybe it can be true. but eventually, he finds out the truth, and now she’s realized (she thinks) she “doesn’t belong anywhere”.

they don’t feel comfortable enough with each other to show who they really are or express their insecurities. that’s where their relationship really fissures. so unless s5 really reworks the entire foundation of their relationship I just don’t think they can come back from all that. even after Mike’s monologue! because that monologue can still be true as a completely platonic thing. he loves her, and he can’t lose her, he’s not lying! but I don’t think it’s enough to save their relationship.

especially because the things they want from each other can be fulfilled by other people.

Hop is back, all the love and validation she needs can be provided by her family. romantic love isn’t necessarily what she needs, she just needs someone to love her for who she is, and they do.

Will accepts, understands, and loves Mike for all that he is. his good parts and his bad. and Mike feels comfortable with Will too, he seeks him out to talk about his feelings and insecurities.

the things they want so badly in their relationship with each other aren’t being met, and they could get it from other sources. so in conclusion, I believe their relationship is over for good and that Mike is a complex and flawed character who is still learning how to be himself and love himself.

[scarletwitch1918]

Today was the second birthday this year of a friend that I thought I was really close with that i didn’t get invited to

[sarcasticdolphin]

So. About Mirrorverse.

Yesterday I discovered that my former co-author for the Mirrorverse deleted her two stories that were part of the series off of ao3 and removed herself as a co-author of the series. I'm not sure exactly when it happened, but that is when I found out about it. The two stories that she wrote both (though the former part 5 more than the former part 3) contain plot points that are important so the later parts of the series make sense.

I honestly haven't decided what to do yet. My first thought was just two write two new Mirrorverse fics to fill the gaps, and I do want the series to be properly whole once more.

But I honestly don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. The me of 12-16 months ago, when the earlier parts of Mirrorverse were written, is very different from the me of now. As a person and especially as a writer. Add to that every time I think about Mirrorverse I'm reminded of my former co-author, which normally results in my writing 'mood,' as it were, rather souring.

I want to write the fics. I really do. Mirrorverse was (and still is) my fanfic baby and I worked on it week-in, week-out for an entire year. I was (and still am) very proud of myself for seeing it through, especially because it was originally planned as a one-shot. I want it to be what it deserves to be, not a puzzle missing two very important pieces.

But I don't know if I'm going to be able to (or willing to) put myself through the level of emotional pain that will be involved in outlining and writing those two replacement fics.

[junranghae]

SO not to drag on a convo from last week but I was listening to Stacy’s beautiful monster and apparently ppl???? Don’t like it???? And I THINK beautiful monster follows the same pattern as ready to love concerning mediocre/whatever mvs making fans think a song isn’t good???? Idk if you’ve listened to the song but it’s a wonderful one and I actually really enjoyed it and didn’t realize ppl didn’t like it???? BUT yeah someone was like “it’s the only bad stayc song” and I was like. This is not correct. - dokcheol <3

omg i get to talk more!!

ok so I'll be the first to admit that i have almost no ability to tell what makes a good mv and what makes a bad mv, i think it's mostly due to indifference since i've never been a big music video person. I had also never seen the beautiful monster mv till right now but honestly i feel like it's not that bad?? Like ready to love I get, even I could tell it's awkward and just like not shot very well?? (Don't get me started on the filter on it WHY ARE WE ASH GREY RN???) but beautiful monster looks normal to me idk. The drawings are cute and the filter isn't THAT annoying. I also don't get why everyone hates that song. Is it the best song I've ever heard? no, but it was fun and completely passable.

[milktian]

slowly healing (trying to fix my timeline to stop showing me hsr and genshin stuff it's so hard why is there so much,,,)

[wren-kitchens]

more of a rant than a vent but could be venty anyway idk i’m being annoyed at stuff tonight GKFHD

[masochistikitty]

mmmm one of those times where my brain is having feelings about the perpetual state of right in between singularity and plurality i experience in my identity. sometimes i think it would be easier if i just felt like different people more strongly cause like im very much not just One person but there is not enough separation between multiple people to have it be like. Multiple People. most of the time lately at least. it definitely has been in the past but then the Everyone Else just fucked off into brainy voidspace so ???????

[phantasmicfish]

Long ranty list of stuff that majorly Sucked in s4 of tua:

- number one thing I loathe is the convenient way tua got their powers back. We get this brief vignette of them without their powers in episode 1, and then by the end of the episode they conveniently find the marigold and *voila* have powers. Where were the stakes? The consequences? Show me TUA struggling to adjust to powerless life. Five annoyed that he has to use the stairs to climb a four story building. Diego failing to chop expertly w knives. Luther struggling to open jars idk give me something. Don’t just do a six year time skip and ignore the mundane!

- Adding onto ^ that I feel like it would make more sense to me if we saw TUA without their powers for maybe 3 eps in s4, and they go through a mini Journey to get them back. Instead it’s like the entire hook of the s3 finale is immediately resolved in episode 1, it annoys me to no end

- Five working for the CIA I sorta get… cuz it’s sorta what he did with The Commission. So now unmoored and powerless he’d probably go back to that lifestyle. But Five, paranoid violent genius in the room Five, not noticing the completely obvious umbrella tattoo on his boss’ wrist?

- Jennifer being introduced, immediately shrugging off the fact that her entire town was murdered/a Truman Show sham, and joining Ben with basically zero questions

- Jennifer getting no character arc beyond she was born in a squid and she loves Ben

- Getting zero recognition that Reginald is an alien. Like. Hello?? You just found out your pos father is AN ALIEN! Are the siblings seriously not going to talk about this

- Also what year is s4 set in. Why do they always dial rotary phones but mention cryptocurrency? What is this universe where everybody knows Reginald and he’s colloquially referred to as “the elite?” Are Reginald and Abigail the… President and Vice President? King and Queen? Just some people who started a massive corporation and got rich?

- No mention of Grace is criminal. It would have made waaaaay more sense if the lady who played Abigail was actually played by Grace. And it would add some heart to Reginald as a character too. Otherwise, instead of secretly loving Grace his alien wife, Grace is just some woman who was alive in the 60s and Reginald made a replica robot mom of her in 2019. For some reason. Idk I feel like the puzzle pieces were all laid out and for some reason TUA writers did not assemble them

- No mention of Pogo or Ray is also incredibly disappointing. Allison betrayed her siblings in order to be with Claire AND with Ray in one universe, but he’s not even in s4. Why even included him in the end of s3 then

- Okay maybe I’m pulling a blank but who tf is Quinn? Why does he know Klaus? Why does he hate Klaus so much?

- Why does Claire know Klaus is immortal? Why is all of sudden cool w her mom having eye glowy powers? You have no questions about that Claire huh…

- It also made sense to me that Lila and Diego would hate domestic life… and to me it seemed like even introducing their kids (not one, but three) was sort of silly. We only really saw Grace at the birthday party and then it seemed like Lila and Diego would forget and then remember the kids existed at weird parts

- Five and Lila giving up searching for a way out of the subway stations six years in seemed sus. Yes, take a break/eat strawberries but why would you stop searching for a way back? You’re supposed to be the best agents in the commission so like… where did that grit/determination go

- Ben dying and being mutated with zero understanding of what was happening to him… just sucked

[wendylianmartin]

To the anon who messaged me yesterday- I got your apology message but it seems like you didn’t want me to post it publicly so I’ll reply to you here.

Thank you for the apology! I never actually read your rant post so it’s no biggie. It seems like you’re really regretful about it and you really didn’t have any negative intentions so don’t beat yourself up over it. Again, you or anyone else are free to post ranty stuff as long as you don’t send it my way! 😂

[intheholler]

what do you think of all of the people being scared of appalachia? i don't know if this is recent or not, but currently i've been seeing a ton of shit online like "never go to the appalachian mountains, it's so dangerous", and i just don't understand it. my family's lived in appalachia for forever, and none of us have experienced anything paranormal or endangering to us. you're one of my favorite blogs on here and i'd just like to hear your thoughts on it

first off, it means a lot that i'm one of your favorite blogs and im really happy i can contribute something to your experience here :') thanks so much for being here <333

but ok so.

my thoughts on it are many. it's been bothering me a long time and i've been meaning to get it off my chest. this will be long and probably ranty, so it won't hurt my feelings if anyone skims lol

lemme preface this little diatribe by saying the obvious: folklore is an integral part of any culture. the mythos of a place/people is tied directly to their histories and unique experiences and struggles and they are enriching. this is true of appalachia too.

oral folk traditions especially are incredibly historically appalachian.

i mentioned in a post i made yesterday about murder ballads, how the purpose of these was to warn kids away from doing dumb shit and getting lost in the hollers--falling down cliffs n mineshafts and shit at night. gettin got by wildlife.

it spooked us safe. they served a purpose, and once you got old enough to realize they're as real as the tooth fairy, they just become enjoyable and nostalgic. because they're you're culture.

probably every mountain kid has stories about haints n boogers that were told to them by their grandparents, and they grow up to tell them to their own kids, and so on. some of it stuck with me because i grew up with the folklore.

by that i mean, i'm a whole 31 year old woman and i still avoid looking out a dark window at night cause it gives me the shivers. i still get spooked when i hear a big cat yowling in the woods. but the difference is i know there's not really haints out there crying--it's just a product of my childhood. ghost stories are fun.

the problem comes in when someone outside the culture gets their hands on appalachian oral folk traditions. then, it becomes a familiar problem: outsiders cherry picking appalachia and harming us with the mess they make rifling through it all.

it's all about the surface level and the visuals. they all love a good aesthetic blog, run by some local from out west or some shit who's never stepped foot here.

but as soon as the spooky photo filters come off and the real life marginalized person is left standing there just out of frame, we go back to being disgusting examples of what not to be. decrepit churches n buildings are aesthetic and quirky until they stop being on a pinterest board, and then they just become damning images of an impoverished region who deserves to be laughed at.

now, not to holler 'splain you--this is more for anyone not from here who might read this: it's been a systemic issue for decades; there were literal government campaigns to demonize us to the rest of the nation so they could garner support to cut into our mountains and exploit our labor and resources.

well, they were fuckin successful, and we have been falsely made out to be this homogenous nightmare of a place--"welfare exploiting" maga country who deserves everything we get, and nothing we don't.

by going so far as to take appalachian folklore that we tell each other and picking out the "aesthetic" stuff--the haints and general paranormal--they are pruning what they like from our culture--the safe things, like ghost stories--for their own aesthetic use.

but not only that, they are using it to demonize us… yet again.

'appalachia is scary. it's full of things that will kill you. don't look out the window at night cause a booger will get you.' only they don't call them boogers cause they ain't even from here. ask them what a haint is and they'll ask if u mispelled 'haunt.'

it gets even worse when you consider that so much of it has roots in native american culture, and how that continues to be exploited and misrepresented.

i'm not even innocent of that. a while back i had to check myself because i made a comment on here about ~spooky appalachia~ ignorant to the fact that what i was commenting on was actually a deeply important cultural and spiritual element to local indigenous tribes. my comments were harmful by my failure to educate myself and know better, thereby saying things carelessly.

my point being--i'm from the area. i should have known better.

when outsiders start saying the kind of shit they say about what they think they hear in the woods without even knowing where such an idea comes from, they're disrespecting a displaced, abused and exploited people, harming real cultures just for clicks without even knowing. that's on top of the damage they're doing to greater appalachia.

it's fuckin gross.

i think my favorite one i ever seen was this middle aged white lady going through her pristine mcmansion somewhere in suburbia, pulling the million curtains and locking the million doors, going "nighttime routine in appalachia!! 🤪🤪"

i could be wrong about this particular person--i didn't check their other tiktoks because im sick of them accounts and tired of giving them the benefit of the doubt--but it immediately came off as a transplant because:

1) mcmansion, 2) i dont know nobody here that locks their shit down like that (not locking up could even be argued as a part of my local culture, a reflection of our deep sense of community and trust in our neighbors).

and then the comments was all like "i don't know how you guys live there" and it actually broke my heart and pissed me off because even if--especially if--you're one of us, why the fuck are you harming us for likes? why are you turning people against us in a brand new way?

and to the transplants that do this--why?

you're not even from here, you moved here to this place you hate and made it worse just so your front porch would have a nice view, and are now benefiting socially from perpetuating bullshit about us?

you buy up all the land, land we often had no choice but to sell in the first place to survive instead of passing it on to our families, land we originally took from the indigenous peoples your content comes from.

you overdevelop it and turn it unrecognizable to make it more like the comfortable cities you come from. you gut a mountain town of its local businesses and cultures, you price people out of their homes...

...and then once you settle in all cozy like, you go tell everyone else how scary it is? how you can't trust the hills? like it's a cool paranormal bravery badge to wear? fuck off entirely.

so idk, in short my personal thoughts are: i personally enjoy a little myth as a treat, because the folklore is a part of the gothic, a part of our culture and a part of my childhood. i don't (intentionally) wield it as a weapon or use it as a pedestal to get the weird brand of attention that people like them are after.

and those who do this can get got by them haints for all i care.

[liauditore]

ADVANCEMENT UNLOCKED: Participate in Hermit a Day May 2024!

I tried putting them to scale best as I could while still keeping them all relatively in frame (bdubs is standing on a slab). Sorry for the awkward crop the full png was too powerful for tumblr and I didn't want to separate gem and pearl.

Shout out to @hermitadaymay (asked to tag) for hosting and the really awesome tags I got to experience and what felt like increasing concern for me or perhaps a need to study me like a animal in a lab expressed through them. (collected some of my favourites below)

(no but genuinely very insane of you to do personalized tags on so many pieces during this event AND read some of my long ranty tags too. I think I may have had a light heart attack when I learnt you were one person running this thing and even if you weren't this level of care is so above and beyond what you had to do -- also very funny and fun please continue studying me at your leisure it's very awesome)

I don't know about everyone else but i frequently scrolled down the hermit a day blog mainly for the art (and seeing everyone's designs and styles!!) but I loved just reading your tags too lol. Always fun when there's a little back and forth. Was really proud of myself when I begun to recognize specific artists' styles who I hadn't encountered before, felt like I was earning video game points I have no idea why.

Amazing event. I'm gonna go try to fix my sleep schedule now o7

[indigos-stardust]

Violet, Blue, And Bruised All Over: Long Talks

Part 1/ Part 2/ Part 3/ Part 4/ Part 5/ Part 6

Note: this has been in my draft for at least 2 weeks, hit a slump and then a hyperfixation couldn't write lol. so this is alot shorter and the drawings wont make as much sense without part like?? 6.5???... but I just wanted to post it cuz I felt bad

Reblogs and comments appreciated <3 I wanna hear y'all's thoughts >:3c

Red and Blue: a deep conversation filled with compassion and vulnerability:

Meanwhile Vio and Green:

(sorry I haven't updated this in a while, real life calls :')

The following days were hell. Red knew how much fights shredded his heart into a bajillion tiny pieces, but really the forced normalcy was so much worse!

The two had gotten an even bigger longer (and honestly ranty) lecture from Green the next day. Red didn't think it really helped much. Like sure they were cowed into NOT biting each other or whatever, but c'mon!

It felt like everyone was mad at everyone else! And even though technically no one was really mad at him, they were all mad at each other which- considering they were all sorta kinda not really the same person? It still felt that way!

Green had gotten really bossy and super serious, and Blue and Vio were just avoiding each other like the plague! Whenever they did come into "an unfortunate proximity" as Vio put it, there wasn't anything but a ton of silent hate! Red really just wanted to curl up into a little hole and die. Well not really! But like, emotionally! Just a bit!

Green kept pushing them to talk about the details, but neither one would talk. Red decided to try asking them one on one, you know, use his charm a bit and soften the edges- But even when he cried it didn't work! Him crying always worked! Especially when he said just the right words in just the right way to softly push them into making a realization.

Red wouldn't really call himself a manipulator in that sense, because hey! He was using his powers for good, right? At least most of the time, anyways. It was a useful way to get out of trouble and get things he wanted...

By why couldn't it work now when he needed it most!!

Vio just treated him like how a parent would to their kid when the kid just, well, asked about death or some hard grownup topic. Like Red just simply wouldn't understand and not to worry about it- But he was worrying! He knew Vio just didn't want him to be sad but still...

Then Blue- Well, Blue was just sad. And a little p*ssed. But it was clear he was just mostly sad. At least when he talked to Red anyways. At first he had been all huffy and insisted that it was all so stupid, so why even bring it up anyways? Because it was "over already!" Which, no that was super stupid of Blue to think, because obviously all their relationships were like super mega sad???

When Red expressed that sentiment though, it seemed to change something in Blue. Blue just closed up and got all quiet. He hated when Blue did that. But it also meant his plan was working. Blue may be a little, uhm, explosive to people and things when he got upset- But really if he was like actually really seriously upset? Then he got all quiet and intense all by himself. But Red knew how to pry all those layers off, even if it was just melting his way though each one of Blue's icy walls, one at a time.

Not even a day later of the guilt obviously devouring Blue inside out, and clearly losing against his ego. (Red knew that's what happened, he probably didn't want to be the "first one to show weakness" and just talk about how his feelings were hurt and acted like he was just all angry and didn't care, but Blue was a big softie and no amount of pouting was gonna change that in Red's eyes.)

They'd been walking to the training yards extremely early in the morning, the sun had barely peeked over the horizon really. In Red's opinion, going all the way to the castle to train in the big professional courtyard before the birds even woke up was probably some sort of crime against humanity. And him. But Red was so close to getting Blue to spill! SO he had to stick with Blue the whole time to make sure his plan would work. He just had to be consistent! Even if... it was at like... Red blearily squinted against the horizon. Five AM? Uegh.

Green was right about those too being similar. But it wasn't just cuz they were so stubborn. More like they were both weirdos that had a vendetta against sleep. Seriously, would it kill Blue to sleep in for five more minutes...

[greatprotector-if]

Hi everyone! It's been a while and I hope you're all doing well :] I have realized that 99.99% of you are not on my personal Tumblr so I should probably update here too. Hey! Hi!

Going to start off by saying that no, The Great Protector has not been abandoned! I am still working on it!

Details under cut. A little ranty, sorry HAHA

So yes, I am still working on TGP! But no, I have nothing to show for all the months I've been gone.

Essentially the plot got way out of hand and in the end it was so messy I felt it would be faster to just start from scratch instead of trying to prune all the unnecessary parts. It was that bad.

I'm currently making my way through the new outline slowly but surely — but I know this isn't the update you all wanted. I literally have less than I had before... haha... and after all these years I completely understand that this is disappointing for all of you, and I'm really sorry about that.

I think I'll always regret putting up that initial intro post for this game as early into production as I did. While the community has been wonderful and I appreciate so much all the support I've received, it's also sort of paralyzing to have so many eyes on you, expecting great things you aren't sure you have the means of providing!

I've sort of just been too scared to work on it because I know that nothing I make could ever satisfy all of you, and then the impostor syndrome in me is telling me that means nothing I do will ever be good enough. Yeah. Brain. Funny guy, the brain.

If I had a time machine I'd go back and force past me not to post jack shit on the internet until he had at least a full chapter written and coded, but alas! Hindsight is 20/20 and all that.

But taking this time away from the blog and restarting the story from scratch has made the pressure feel a lot less intense. I really, really do appreciate everyone who's shown interest in my silly little project so far, but I will likely continue on with my break away from this blog until I have an actual demo. It makes me feel guilty to post here with my hands empty haha

I have no idea how long it will be until said actual demo is ready, but I sure hope it won't take another multiple years!

Again, I'm sorry about how this has gone. The next time I post something on this blog, it'll probably be less depressing I promise 🙌

With love,

Cassian

[teddie-bear420]

tier list

OPINONS UNDER THE CUT

warning this is super long and ranty but does have some silly doodles ill post else where :)

-teddie bear 420

I have had several dreams about vaggie and lute and alastor, they plage my every waking moment. one was me going to smooch city with alastor (very scary that man does not wash his teeth). the others vaggie just shows up sometimes

really liked vaggie in her angel flash back, her hair cut was so cute, not a fan she still has pink eye but what eves. I LOVE HER PONY TAIL THO, give my girl better hair styles!!!

do you think theyve explored each others bodies?

I hated lute at first cuz, just look at her. you could get snow blindness with how white that woman is oh my lord. but once the 8th episode rolled around with hot women fighting my brain kinda clicked on for our old second in command. i keep going back to her in my brain and slowly morphing her into a heart broken lesbian who has a superiority complex and bullies her crush and then moves on to having a sugar mama situation ship with Lilith.

alastor is just so fun and silly, and there's this one x reader fic that ive made fan art of, you've all seen it. i just love this guy but i like to imagine he's a woman just for me :)

i understand why he is a fan favorite

i love charlies look but i hate how childish she is, like girl you are like 24 kill your friends pimp. nifty molly emily are all so cute and i enjoy looking at them. cant wait for the nifty episode (delusional)

i do love nifty more than the rest of these ones tho. i see lots of folks talking about how nifty is alastors daughter or angel dusts little baby daughter SHUT UP

SHES 25 YEARS OLD AND MURDERED HER HUSBAND IN HER SLEEP. NIFTY CALLED ALASTOR OVER TO HAVE THEIR LUNCH DATE AND HIDE THE BODY!!!

OK maybe nifty lives in my dreams too

do you think theyve explored each others bodies?

mimzy makes me mad cuz the show hated having her there clearly, like why is she the only fat person in hell. dont worry girl, I'll appreciate you once again i have to make alastor a dyke for my own sanity

do you think they-

lilith and rosie are good to look at, i like how rosie talks and her showtunes, god i love her show tunes. pentious is the only yellow dude in hell. velvete looks like ass most of the time but I LOVE A BAD BITCH

like i said, no strong feelings

ok most of these dudes are too ugly or too annoying and i hate when they are on screen, lucifers pants are his skin, angel dust has the worst fashoin sense ever UGHS I HATE HIM WHERE ARE HIS TITS WAAAAAA

also i love that her name is sarah, thats such a basic name, like i can type alastor x reader and theres a bunch of results but if i typed sarah x reader, shes no where :(

also shes got that mlp horse face going on i love it

i despise carmilla carmine, i hate her dumb horns, i hate her unnamed daughters, i hate her skirt, i hate her song, i hate her blazed ass eyes, i hate her long hair

vox just looks bad i cant lie

OK ADUM MAKES ME SO MAD HE SHOULD HAVE BEEN JACK BLACK WE SHOULD HAVE SEEN HIM BEING A FAT BASTARD CUZ I WAS CONVINCED HE WAS ANOTHER SKINNY TWINK also i am an anti shipper when it comes to adum x lute cuz that shit is weaaaak. he is so mean to her and not in a hot way, adum is some incel and lute is a goddess

yeah, #adumisoverparty 2024 the most divorced man in heaven

i can not wait for season two dude, im so pumped

[minas-linkverse]

Ngl I was going to ask about Breath of the Wild but I’d thought you’d get a million of those asks lol. I was also torn between asking about Wind Waker, so whichever one you want to answer more is chill!!

haha yea I thought I'd get a million asks too! Somehow even now this remains the only botw ask, I guess people just figured it must've been sent already 😅

Now to actually share my thoughts on botw... Man I hope people don't get mad at me.

I did not like it!. The first play through I had was mildly exciting simply due to there being a whole unknown world to see, but after a while that gimmick wore off. I knew that if I made my way to the cool looking mountain or interesting abandoned building I'd just find a bokoblin and/or a chest with a gem. Whats the point of a gorgeous expansive world when all I find is the same...! 😫

Oh wow! A town with a whole new atmosphere and culture I sure wonder what I'll get up to h- Ok they have the same shops with slightly different items. Ok cool. There's like a few small quests for more inventory filler I don't really need. Cool cool.

I understand that the game is really fun for some people, they'll do quests just to get to play more of the game. They want all that extra stuff to upgrade armour and really get into the nitty gritty mechanics of the game... But I did not. It was not for me.

Also ouugh the puzzles...! My favourite part of Zelda games is the puzzle solving, but these were in no way satisfying and often more fun to just break. Why would I bother even trying to get into the devs heads when A) I could just break it and B) I have too many options to consider! I can't possibly get a clean eureka moment when everything from monster guts to just climbing could be the solution...! Where's the engaging simplicity of knowing exactly what you have and following the devs' clues to reach the solution!! Waaaaaaaaaaaaa--

I also disliked the story, all the interesting bits in it happened a 100 years ago and I feel like I arrived late with a starbucks. I also will not get over the weird ending cutscene!! After countless fascinating memories of Zelda having very complex emotions at Link... What do you mean you're just going to have a vaguely romantic "Do you still remember me?" YEAH I DO, I thought u disliked me! Which is a fascinating story direction I would've loved continued but OK! I guess we're ignoring that! Women cant be angry that makes them less cute and marketable, I guess!!!!

I... Sorry this is so ranty, I've been holding it in a long time. I think there's a lot to love in botw and I wish I wasn't so sour about it. Other people's love and excitement for it is wonderful and I hope they keep making the art they love. If its your first game in the series and got you into it, that's nothing to be ashamed about. I'm just a grumpy old man waving at cloud /ref.

Honestly I think botw could've been wonderful if it was a new IP. It feels all the Zelda stuff was sort of glued onto a concept that wasn't prepared to carry that mantle. It would've been better off with a new exciting world and cast of characters. It still wouldn't be a game I much care for, but the freedom that could've granted the developers would've been a treat to see.

It's worth adding that even though I dislike botw, I want to treat the characters of that game with respect and care in my comic. I may not love them in game but I can see the passion others have and I am committed to make something worth their time. Your special guys are safe with me. I have 0 desire to dunk on them, and instead wish to honour the love you all have. In a way I'm learning to love them myself through that.

[agent-oo-z]

Ok more Tad-fools and Tavi-cule thoughts

Yada yada spoilers potential blah blah you know the drill

Atavia loves all her companions on a soul deep level. Maybe not all romantically and/or sexually but her platonic and familial love is just as intense and all encompassing. Everyone stays in touch in no small part because Tavi is always on top of who’s where and what they’re doing. She’s always down to lend a hand if need be. Animal sitting, baby sitting, house sitting, sure of course. But also! Need help on a quest? Want backup for a fancy schmancy political event? Need someone to do some sneakin and spyin? She’s your gal! Maybe not quite a grand hero adventurer any more but she’s certainly not “retired”

But that got me thinking about the others. How they interact with each other with or without Atavia being involved. So here we are! This post is about Astarion and the others.

Shadowheart

Astarion and Shadowheart continue their “tea time” (cough wine cough) gossip get togethers of course. But they also just enjoy spending time together. Whenever Shadowheart is in town form Sèlunite things they make sure to have a night out on the town together.

When Astarion is eventually cured of vampirism, Shadowheart helps teach him how to swim. She’s on the “help Astarion adjust to being not un-dead anymore” committee and helps him go through various foods to make sure he doesn’t have any allergies.

When something pisses Astarion off like. A WHOLE LOT. He writes to Shadowheart about it and then they meet up so he can get full on angry screaming ranty. His partners all struggle when he’s upset like that because they want to fix the reason he’s upset, but sometimes that’s just not an option. So Shadowheart steps in to be there for him while he just gets the anger and frustration out of his system. She’ll also call him out if he’s being the unreasonable one.

Lae’zel

As another part of the “help Astarion adjust to being not un-dead anymore” committee, Lae’zel’s main job is helping him get used to fighting again. His senses are all different, his body far more vulnerable to damage, etc. so she spars with him while he gets used to being alive again.

He also uses her for stealth practice. He’s abysmal at sneaking up on her for the first month or so but every time he fails she tells him exactly what gave him away. It’s very helpful.

When Lae’zel is working on adjusting to living in Faerun, Astarion helps her bridge the gap from “hyper practical survival focused analysis” mode to “social etiquette and interaction” mode. Because he knows how to view social interaction in the survival mode and knows how to view survival in the social interaction mode. This helps Lae’zel start to pick up on things on her own without having to be explicitly told about them.

Karlach

Once her engine is fixed all the way, Astarion helps Karlach cope with being used by Mizora and Zariel. Same with him and Wyll. They get together and talk about being used against their will by horrible beings. Astarion and Karlach talk about the physical effects of it, the lingering pains and phantom hands, the ways that having your body torn apart so often can impact you mentally. They do lots of “I’m in charge of my own body” activities together. Getting piercings, tattoos, etc.

Karlach is very physically affectionate. She’s just about the only person aside from his partners who have standing permission to just hug him and hold him and cuddle him at all times(unless he says otherwise). It also helps that he’s cool and she’s hot so they can help sort of even each other’s temperatures out through physical contact.

When Astarion starts to get twitchy because things have been “normal” for too long Karlach takes him out to a seedy bar and they indulge. Sometimes they get in fights, sometimes they just get intoxicated, they just generally fuck around for a little while. A bit of controlled chaos.

Wyll

Wyll and Astarion end up really close friends after Karlach’s engine is fixed. Astarion spends a lot of his free time studying modern law. He’s not a proper legal professional but he could be if he put his mind to it. Mostly he just uses his knowledge to help Wyll navigate high society political dealings and all that. Astarion becomes the unofficial Ravenguard legal counsel. Having an intimidating legal counsel who will take no shit on his or your own behalf proves very useful. And Wyll works with the Gur and the spawn in the underdark to help study vampirism and its potential cures/treatments. His connections and influence help them all get hold of rare materials and powerful allies.

As mentioned with Karlach they talk about the struggles of losing your bodily autonomy, especially in regard to your physical appearance, together. I personally head canon that when Astarion is “cured” he still retains a lot of the physical changes of vampirism. Sharp canines, red eyes, the bite scar, and running cooler than most. Which at first is really upsetting and frustrating for him. But talking with Wyll helps him process that looking like his “old” self would be equally weird and unfamiliar.

Astarion LOVES being invited to fancy upper class affairs. Parties, galas, dinners, all of it. Atavia doesn’t often attend(social anxiety Babey) and Gale and Halsin are both usually too busy with their own work. So Astarion and Wyll end up spending most events together just the two of them. He loves to be an absolute menace and flirt with everyone in sight. Wyll pretends to be super upset but secretly enjoys it.