#this feels shameful?? I know I shouldn't feel bad because this is my first time tackling such a large research presentation...

[makeitmingi]

When Flowers Bloom In The Dark [Chapter 21]

Genre: Romance, Mafia!AU, Violence, Angst, Slow burn

Pairing: Hongjoong x Reader (y/n)

Characters: Florist!Reader, Mafioso!Hongjoong, Mafioso!Seonghwa, Mafioso!Yunho, Mafioso!Yeosang, Mafioso!San, Mafioso!Mingi, Mafioso!Wooyoung, Mafioso!Jongho

Summary: When you appeared and wept at his mother's funeral, Hongjoong found himself wanting to find out more about you. A regular girl, who owns a flower shop in his territory and has a relationship with the mother that he hasn't spoken to in years, why hasn't he ever noticed you before?

[Warning(s): 18+ for violence, use of weapons, smoking, alcohol consumption, slight gore, gang affiliation, tattoos and character deaths. Minors DNI. This is a work of fiction and does not represent the Ateez members in real life.]

Word count: 3.2K

You didn't miss the way Hongjoong's face fell when you retracted your hand. His own hand fell back by his side as his eyes searched yours, waiting for you to say something. Did you like Hongjoong? Was that why you were feeling all these different feelings when you were around him?

"I realise this is a lot for you to take in now. You don't have to say anything." Hongjoong spoke first. The silence was killing him and he just needed to break it before he breaks.

"I'm scared." You admitted.

"Why?" He didn't expect you to say that, he thought you would tell him that you didn't feel the same or that you liked him back.

"Hongjoong, what if you only feel this way because I am a connection to your mother? I know you don't have an ulterior motive consciously but maybe it's subconscious-"

"No, don't say that. If you don't feel the same way back, that's fine. But don't... just don't..." His jaw clenched, unintentionally snapping at you.

"I'm sorry." You whispered.

"It's alright. This is a lot, I shouldn't have..." Hongjoong was now feeling the weight of his words sink in.

"No! No... It's not like that. Please don't feel bad, this is all on me. You telling me this actually helps, it answers a lot of questions I've been having." You said, making his eyes light up slightly.

"But Hongjoong, even if I do feel the same way for you, I don't know if I can go through this, knowing that there's so much more to your life that I don't know about. I don't know the real you yet, we've only just started really knowing each other." You confessed.

"I understand. (y/n), I do want to let you into my world, to see and know the real me but the thought of you getting hurt because of me... I can't fathom..." He sighed.

"Whether you let me in now, as a friend or as a romantic partner, I'm still going to be in danger, aren't I?" You questioned.

"Yes..." He nodded glumly with much guilt and shame.

"We haven't had a chance to even go out on a date yet. Shall we just go from there?" You offered a small smile. And Hongjoong hummed in agreement.

In reality, your heart was hurting. Of course, you like Hongjoong back but you couldn't bring yourself to give your heart over so quickly.

"I'll go." Hongjoong said. You took the initiative this time, wrapping your arms around his waist.

After seeing Hongjoong with all the rich daughters, you couldn't believe he was here, expressing his feeling for you. You were not like those opulent women, you couldn't just throw yourself at him.

"There has been no one else. I don't care about those rich girls. They're nothing to me." He whispered, as if he could hear your mental doubts.

"They may be more worth it than me." You said, words slightly muffled by his shoulder.

"No, don't say that. I just know you're so much better than them, you're more worth it and deserving than them, I'll prove it to you if you let me." He spoke with determination. When he felt you nod, he let out a small sigh of relief, you weren't outrightly rejecting him, you were giving him a chance.

"Goodnight. Don't stay out too late, go home and rest." He spoke softly and fondly, daringly giving you a kiss on your forehead before leaving the shop.

"Goodbye." You said to his retreating back but you doubt he could even hear you.

"He likes me..." You fell back into the chair, realisation hitting you. You buried your face into your hands.

You thought back to all the times you felt your heart race when you were with Hongjoong. It wasn't nerves or anything, now it was clear to you that you liked Hongjoong back.

It brought tears to your eyes. You were scared, you were confused, you felt guilt for the hurt that you caused Hongjoong.

Right now, you didn't know what to do. You had no one that you could talk to about this.

And you knew you had no right to feel upset because you were the one that pulled away, you were the one who set the boundary and was afraid to cross it.

Despite Hongjoong trying to hide it from you, the few times that you've encountered him outside, it was obvious that he and his brothers were involved in some illegal business. They could be running their own mafia syndicate.

Would you be able to live with that? You laid low your entire life, could you really throw that away and put yourself in the spotlight with Hongjoong as his partner?

All for the sake of love?

It was too much for you to think about now. All you wanted to do was go home and hide in bed.

Hongjoong didn't bother going back to the party. He sent a text to his brothers and went to one of his bars which was close by to where he was. All he wanted to do now was get drunk.

"Boss Kim." The staff greeted him.

"I'll be in my office. No one is to disturb me." He said briefly and walked up the stairs.

"Yes, boss." They all bowed, watching him trudge up the stairs. Entering his office, Hongjoong grabbed the entire whiskey bottle off the bar cart and a glass.

"You're an idiot." He told himself as he poured himself a glass and downed the contents in one go. Then he moved to refill his glass. Cradling the crystal in his hands, he slumped in his office chair.

He lifted his hand to look at it, clenching it into a fist. The feeling of you slipping your hand away from his, it was painful. But Hongjoong knew you were right. You didn't know each other enough to enter a relationship now. He'll just have to cast aside his worries and show you his true self.

"And this is my office." The door opened and Hongjoong raised his head with a frown. He gave orders to not be disturbed.

"B-Boss Kim!" The assistant manager jumped when he saw Hongjoong sitting in his office chair, obviously not expecting the main boss to be in his office.

"Your office?" Hongjoong seethed.

"Who is that?" The assistant manager's friends were confused, thinking there was a stranger in their friend's office.

"Is this how things have been running since I've not been here?" Hongjoong rose from his desk. He threw his crystal glass, crashing it into the wall by the assistant manager's head.

"GET OUT!" He roared, a threat that he won't miss the next time. The assistant manager and his friends ran off.

Has Hongjoong been that distracted that his staff were acting up without his knowledge? He was always on the ball on these things.

"Now I need another glass." Hongjoong cursed and went to get another glass from the bar cart, filling it up with more whiskey. But this time, he laid down on the couch instead of returning to sit in his office chair. Letting out a sigh, he gulped the alcohol.

RINGGGGG

"Mmmm...?" Hongjoong groaned and fished for his phone, pressing it to his ear.

"Are you dead in a ditch somewhere?"

"What do you need, Hwa? I'm gonna hang up..." He trailed off, on the brink of falling back asleep. Right now, he was nursing a bad headache from finishing off the whiskey last night.

"Where are you? I'm coming to get you."

"No." Hongjoong refused and hung up, cutting off Seonghwa's protests. He threw his phone aside and went back to sleep.

"God, why is there glass on the floor?" It only took about 30 minutes for Seonghwa to arrive at where Hongjoong was. Hongjoong was fast asleep, not aware of his best friend's arrival.

"Get someone to clean this up." Seonghwa ordered the manager, who bowed and scurried away.

"Kim Hongjoong, wake up." Seonghwa hit the back of Hongjoong's head. The captain finally stirred, holding his already hurting head and curling up into a ball, away from Seonghwa. Seonghwa didn't even need to go close to Hongjoong, he could smell the alcohol that reeked from the captain's body.

"Did you kill someone?" Seonghwa asked.

"No, I threw a crystal glass near his head but he was alive enough to run away with his friends. I missed on purpose." Hongjoong mumbled, eyes still closed.

"What happened? You left the gala and just disappeared. And dropping us a 'text' saying you're not coming back doesn't count."

"I don't want to talk about it..." Hongjoong said, knowing he sounds like an angsty teenager.

"Look, whatever happened between you and (y/n), you have responsibilities, Joong. You're the head of the family." Seonghwa sighed. Hongjoong finally sat up at that, looking at the taller.

"How did you know? Did she tell you? What did she tell you?" Hongjoong's eyes widened in panic.

"Calm down, I didn't even talk to her. I just assumed because your mood is very much related to (y/n) nowadays." He stated.

"Oh... It's fine. I'm just moping. Let's go home. I need to shower." Hongjoong stood up, grabbing his jacket from his desk while Seonghwa grabbed the phone that was tossed to the ground after the call earlier.

The two of them exited Hongjoong's office and everyone bowed to them as they walked down the stairs. Before heading to the car, Hongjoong turned to the manager.

"If I find out anyone is impersonating me and in my office without permission again, it'll be your head I go for next." He threatened.

"Y-Yes sir! It will never happen again. The assistant manager has been fired." The manager apologised.

"Good." Hongjoong nodded and left with Seonghwa. The driver came out with a greeting bow to Hongjoong and opened the door for the two oldest to enter.

"Let's go." Hongjoong said and the driver started the car.

"When we get home, go shower. We're holding a meeting to discuss the gala last night." Seonghwa informed.

"Okay, can you get the chefs to prepare me some food? I haven't eaten and I'm having hangover stomach." Hongjoong asked. Seonghwa nodded with a soft hum.

Hongjoong could be clumsy and forgetful, and Seonghwa might be naggy and 'uptight' but the two had a soft spot for each other, they'll always take care of each other, no matter what. That's what best friends do. And even if Seonghwa was nagging now, he was worried about Hongjoong.

"Welcome home, sirs." The butler greeted them at the door. Hongjoong dropped his jacket and made his way upstairs, wanting to take a warm shower.

"He's home?" San came out of the dining room.

"Yeah. But he wouldn't tell me what happened. It's obvious it had something to do with (y/n). He's so hungover." Seonghwa sighed.

"Did they fight?" Yunho asked worriedly. Seonghwa shrugged and went to the kitchen to ask the chef to prepare something for Hongjoong to nurse his hangover.

"And get him a hangover cure." He added before leaving to join the others in the living room.

"He's fine, everyone. Just get ready for the meeting." Seonghwa said, meeting the worried eyes of the other members.

"Yes, hyung." They replied and split up to get ready for the meeting. Mingi went to the computer room to get his information downloaded onto his tablet. Jongho and Yunho were inside, also putting together their meeting agendas.

"Do you have anything to do with last night?" Mingi asked his best friend. Yunho shook his head and the serious expression on his face indicated that he wasn't lying.

"Come on, Seonghwa hyung already said that Hongjoong hyung will be fine." Jongho said.

"It's not Hongjoong hyung I'm worried about. It's (y/n). Hongjoong hyung has us but who does she have?" Yunho pointed out.

"With hyung's temper..." Jongho added.

"Okay, let's not think the worst, especially of Hongjoong hyung. Maybe it's nothing and we're just jumping to conclusions." Mingi said, grabbing the tablet and leaving the computer room.

Hongjoong emerged from his bathroom, fresh out of the shower. He changed into a new suit and left his room.

"Your food is ready in the dining room, sir." The butler informed.

"I'm going to my office. Bring the food up to me." Hongjoong said, checking his phone. The butler nodded and bowed before walking away while Hongjoong headed to his office. He sat down and turned on his computer, sifting through all the mesages he missed yesterday while preparing for the gala.

*KNOCK KNOCK*

"Come in." Hongjoong called out, not looking up from his screen as he typed away to reply to the more important messages.

"Sir." The butler came in with his tray of food. Hongjoong knocked his fist against his desk and the butler carefully placed the tray of food before him, careful not to intrude in his space.

"That'll be all." Hongjong waved him off. The butler bowed and left the captain's office.

"Hangover cure..." He ignored the bottle and began to drink the soup.

*KNOCK*

"Who is it?" Hongjoong frowned as he looked up. There was another single knock and he beckoned for the person to come in. The door burst open and two men fell in.

"What's going on here?" He stood up, seeing the two practically crawling on the ground, injured beyond belief.

"B-Boss Kim..." They struggled.

"What happened?" Hongjoong asked, standing before them. Usually, they would handle issues on their own, that's what Hongjoong trained them for, but for them to show up to Hongjoong's office in such a state was concerning.

"We were ambushed, boss. In area 1..." The male coughed out, holding his ribs. Hongjoong chewed on his bottom lip, he checked his watch for the time.

"Clean yourselves up. I have a meeting but we'll talk after. Go get checked with the infirmary first." He said.

"Y-Yes, boss." The two supported each other and limped out of Hongjoong's office.

'Message to all teams that can spare men. Area 1 was ambushed and needs back up. Contact Area 1 team to ask for details and support them. - Hongjoong'

Hongjoong's phone buzzed with acknowledgement messages from his men. He didn't have time to read them now.

"Damn it." He reluctantly opened the bottle of hangover cure and downed it since he didn't have to finish the soup on his tray.

"Clear my tray." Hongjoong said to a passing maid, who nodded and bowed, entering Hongjoong's office. He wanted to just grab what he needed and go for the meeting but he had things to settle.

"Sir." The maid bowed and left his office with the tray. Seonghwa, who was walking past, glanced at the tray with practically 3/4 of the food left and swung by Hongjoong's office instead of going straight to the meeting room like he intended. He saw Hongjoong frantically sending messages and calls.

"Hongjoong, what's wrong?" Seonghwa tilted his head.

"Nothing. Just something I need to settle after the meeting." Hongjoong replied, too focused on his computer screen to give more details to his second in command.

"I'll see you at the meeting room." Seonghwa was about to leave him but Hongjoong stood up.

"I'll go with you! Hang on." Hongjoong clumsily flipped through the items on his desk, looking for his iPad and documents.

"Let's go." The two walked to the meeting room together. As usual, Hongjoong sat at the head of the table with Seonghwa on his right, just like how they sat at the dining table.

"Hey, hyungs." Mingi greeted as he shuffled in and took his seat. The others streamed in and all sat down in their seats.

"Does anyone need to get anything?" Seonghwa asked as San and Yeosang stood by the door.

"Nope." They all shook their heads.

"Alright, we're all here. Go ahead." San confirmed before Yeosang locked the meeting room door, securing it with the lock. They all heard the metal gears turn and lock into place, essentially locking all of them in the meeting room.

"Let's begin the meeting. Begin with the gala last night." Hongjoong instructed. Each of the boys gave a run down of the important conversations they had with different business partners.

"And we're sure we can trust him?" San asked.

"Yes, all background checks have come up clean, everything. We can trust him, for now at least." Jongho replied.

"Alright, make sure to run surveillance still. Next." Hongjoong waved and Yunho stepped up, presenting the main points of the conversation he had with the governor last night.

"That's all he's donating? What a cheapskate." Wooyoung rolled his eyes and clicked his tongue.

"I have a strong feeling he doesn't think this initiative will take off well. But I'll be sure to convince him again, hyung." Yunho promised.

"Okay, you take care of that. And good job on the gala last night, Yunho." Hongjoong nodded, he was confident in each of the members' ability to 'convince' people.

"Thank you, hyung." Yunho bowed his head and the others all gave him smiles or thumbs ups.

After that, Hongjoong let Seonghwa address the room on other 'family' related matters. While the older spoke, Hongjoong drumed his fingers against the table top. Was he supposed to tell the members where he disappeared to last night? He felt like he owed them that much for being irresponsible.

"So, everyone has to be on the look out. We cannot afford to have a slip in judgement, it will not only affect us but affect everyone under us." Seonghwa said.

"Yes, hyung." The others nodded obediently.

"Hongjoong, anything to add?" Seonghwa turned to the captain, who was chewing the inside of his cheek.

"I would like to apologise for disappearing last night, it was irresponsible of me to do so as the captain. I know I owe all of you an explanation of where I was." Hongjoong breathed.

"It's okay, hyung. You don't have to tell us..." Wooyoung said, sensing Hongjoong turmoil.

"No, it's fine. I... confessed my romantic feelings for (y/n) last night." He revealed. Some boys' eyes widened in surprise.

"We decided to just get to know each other better before taking any steps forward. She's right, I keep a lot of secrets from her and am not honest about a lot of things." Hongjoong sighed.

"Wait, so you're going to tell her about Ateez?" Seonghwa blinked. Even if he was rooting for Hongjoong for a while, he never really thought about the implications of you knowing what they do. Would you become a liability?

"Eventually." Hongjoong nodded.

"What happens to us then?" Yeosang asked.

"Nothing will happen to any of you, nothing will change for you. (y/n) knowing Ateez will be my responsibility. Anything concerning her will be my responsibility." Hongjoong said.

"You already have a lot to take care of, hyung. Are you sure this is the right way to go?" Mingi pointed out.

"(y/n) means a lot to me, as do all of you. There's never too much when it comes to the people you love." The captain said seriously.

"I wish you and (y/n) all the best, hyung." Jongho smiled. Seonghwa reached out to squeeze Hongjoong's shoulder to show his wordless support too.

"We're not getting married but thanks." Hongjoong chuckled.

~

Series masterlist

[insidekatmind]

My Boyfriend's Father~Cho Sang woo

Wearning: +18,smut,age gap,cheating.

A/n: Inspired by a handcanon I read <3

You look at yourself in the mirror for the umpteenth time, nervously licking your clothes. Your heart is pounding in your chest as you wait outside the door, shaking your boyfriend’s hand so hard that his knuckles turn white. "Are you afraid?" he asks with a funny smile. "No!" you answer in a whisper, but your voice betrays you. It’s the first time you meet his father and the idea of making a bad impression terrifies you. But when the door opens and your eyes meet his father’s, the breath is stuck in your throat.Cho Sang-woo is... attractive. Much more than you would have imagined. He has a confident, elegant posture, and his piercing gaze pierces you like a sharp blade. He looks at you for a moment too long, then smiles, a light but intense smile.

“We finally know each other,” he says in a deep voice, holding out a hand to you. When you hold her, the warmth of her skin surprises you. “My son was lucky to find you.” You blush slightly, you are alone under the attention of his father, who tilts his head and looks at you with interest. “So, come here, let me see better,” he says, opening his arms to you. You have no choice. You move closer and he hugs you warmly, but it's the way his hands rest on you that makes you hold your breath. One remains on your back, the other slides dangerously down, touching the limit of what is permissible. It's a moment. Maybe it's just you imagining it. Maybe it's an innocent gesture... or maybe not. When you release yourself from the hug, his smile is still there, reassuring, kind, but something indecipherable shines in his eyes.

“Come on, have a seat,” he tells you, with an elegant wave of his hand. You sit next to your boyfriend, but still feel the warmth of Sang-Woo's hand on your body. And when you look up, he's there, looking at you, with a smile that seems to know something you don't even dare think about. You try to concentrate on the conversation, on the words of your boyfriend who tells you something about his work, his day, but your brain is a mess. Every time you try to turn your thoughts away, the memory of Sang-Woo's touch still burns on your skin. You shouldn't feel this way. He's your boyfriend's father. It's wrong. But every time you look up, he's there. He watches you, attentive, with a hint of amusement in his eyes. It makes you feel vulnerable, exposed, and at the same time… alive. “So,” Sang-Woo’s voice creeps into your thoughts, deep and velvety. “How long have you been together?”

“It's been several months already,” your boyfriend replies, taking your hand with a smile. “She's amazing, Dad, really.” Sang-Woo nods, then tilts his head slightly. “Oh, I can see it clearly.” He says it with perfect calm, yet his voice has something insinuating, almost provocative. You seem to feel it glide across your skin like an invisible touch. Your breathing becomes shorter and he notices it. You can tell by the way his lips curve ever so slightly into a satisfied smile. You try to look away, but it's like being sucked into a vortex. His magnetism keeps you trapped. And the biggest problem is that you like it. You like his look, his control over the situation, the way he seems to read your every hidden thought. “I hope my son treats you as you deserve,” he continues, sipping his glass of wine with an air of complete relaxation. “Because if it wasn't… well, that would be a real shame.”

When the night comes to an end and your boyfriend is drunk, Sang-Woo looks at him with a disapproving glance. “You shouldn't drink too much, Son,” he tells him, his voice stern and authoritative. His tone seems to carry a hint of warning. Your boyfriend apologizes, but Sang-Woo just shakes his head. “Go and rest, I'll take care of her.” Your boyfriend nods and staggers to the bedroom, and you're left alone with him. Sang-Woo's gaze turns to you, his eyes studying you with sharp attention.He takes a step closer, invading your personal space with his imposing presence, and you feel your heart beating faster in your chest. There's something in his gaze that makes you nervous, but at the same time, intrigued. "Let me take you home," he says, and there's no room for refusal in his tone. "It's late. I don't like the idea of you traveling alone."You stare enthralled him for two seconds and then nod. “Thank you,” you whisper.

Sang-Woo's lips curve into a half-smile. He seems pleased with your compliance. "Don't thank me," he replies, his voice low and almost velvety. "It's the least I could do. I wouldn't want you to end up in trouble." He offers you his arm with a small gesture, and you hesitate for a moment before accepting it. His touch sparks a current inside you, a mixture of excitement and uncertainty.Sang woo smiled satisfied now that he had you all to himself and he could have sworn that he would seduce you.

As you both walk to his car, Sang-Woo feels satisfied with the situation. He has you next to him at this hour, and he can't deny that the idea of having you all to himself excites him. He glances at you from time to time, noticing the way your body tenses under his gaze, the way you unconsciously cling to his arm. He knows the effect he has on you, and he relishes it.When you reach the car, he opens the door for you with a gentlemanly gesture, but his hand lingers a little too long on your waist. You feel his touch like a warm flame on the skin, and it makes a shiver run through you. "Careful," he murmurs, and there's something in his voice, an almost possessive note, that makes you swallow. He's enjoying the situation, and you feel like a mouse in the hands of a cat.

You get inside the car, and the interior is enveloped in an intimate silence. Sang-Woo takes the driver's seat and starts the engine without saying a word. The car glides smoothly on the road, and the only sounds are the hum of the motor and the occasional murmur of the radio. You're aware of his presence next to you, his scent invading your senses, making your heart beat faster. His hand is on the gear shift, and for a moment you wonder if his fingers would feel so good on your skin.

As if Sang Woo could read your mind, he put his hand on your thigh and caressed it as he drove. Just as the thought crossed your mind, you feel his hand on your thigh, and gasp softly. Sang-Woo's touch is firm, and his fingers seem to leave a trail of fire on your skin under the fabric of your dress. He looks straight ahead, but the corner of his mouth curves into a sly smile. He looks like he's enjoying making you feel so out of control, and it drives you crazy.Your breath becomes shallower, and you try to ignore the effect he's having on you. But it's impossible. His thumb moves in slow circles, tracing an invisible pattern on your skin, and it takes all your willpower not to shiver. You're hyper-aware of every gesture, every move he does. You don't understand why you're reacting this way, why your body betrays you so shamelessly.You feel your panties getting wet, and it drives you crazy. You can feel the embarrassment rising in you, and you start to wonder how he will react. Will he notice the effect he's having on you? Will he use it against you? You try to move, to shift positions, to do something, anything to break the tension, but he doesn't let you.

Sang-Woo looks in your direction as if he sensed that something was bothering you and you see the hint of a smile on his lips, almost a challenge. "Everything alright?" he asks, and his tone seems innocent, but you know he's fully aware of the situation.You nod. "Your son is very lucky to have a father like you" you say trying to change the subject while still feeling his hand on your thigh. Sang-Woo's thumb continues to draw languid circles on your thigh, and his amused smile widens. "Is that so?" he asks, tilting his head slightly. "Why do you think that?" His tone is relaxed, but there's something in his eyes, a glimmer of challenge, that makes you feel a shiver down your spine.

You notice him pulling into a parking lot and you lick your lips. "Well you take care of him" you whisper feeling more excited with every touch of his. You curse yourself for wearing a skirt. Sang-Woo parks in a secluded spot away from any other cars, and the silence that descends upon you is almost electrifying. "Yes, I take care of him," he murmurs, his voice dropping lower, almost a whisper. His hand moves higher on your thigh, and it takes all your effort not to moan in response. "But tonight, I want to take care of something else..."His words create a shiver deep in your body, and you can't deny the effect they have on you. You're almost panting now, breathless, waiting for his next move. You know it's not right, you know you shouldn't feel this way, but it's becoming impossible to resist. His touch seems to awaken something primal inside you, something you didn't even know was there.

Sang-Woo can feel your excitement, the tension that builds inside you, and it fuels his own desire. He leans closer, his hand now resting on the inside of your thigh, and you're acutely aware of his proximity, his warmth, his scent surrounding you.Your breathing is heavy as you look at him longingly.

Sang-Woo's eyes are fixed on yours, their gaze almost hypnotising. He's aware of the effect he has on you, and he enjoys seeing you at his mercy. "You know, I've been watching you all night," he whispers, his voice dripping with sensuality. "The way you laughed, the way you talk... you're an absolute distraction." His hand slides higher up your thigh, and you gasp softly, barely able to contain yourself.His touch is almost possessive now, and it fuels your arousal even more. You've never felt so alive and so vulnerable at the same time. It's intoxicating, the way he can make you feel just with a few words and a touch. You close your eyes for a moment, trying to regain control of your own reactions, but it's no use. He has you completely under his spell.

Sang-Woo leans closer, his lips hovering just an inch from your ear. "Tell me," he says in a low, velvety voice, "what do you want?" His hand continues to move up your thigh, his thumb tracing an invisible line on your sensitive skin. You're trembling now, your mind a chaos of conflicting thoughts. You know you should stop this, but you don't want to.You try to find your voice, but all that comes out is a soft moan. "I ..." you stammer, trying to find the words, but your brain isn't working anymore. Your whole body is on fire, responding to his proximity, to his touch, and it makes your head spin.

Sang-Woo chuckles softly, and the sound sends a shiver down your spine. He knows he has you right where he wants you, and he's enjoying it immensely. "Use your words, darling," he teases, his breath on your neck sending another wave of desire through you.You take a deep breath and try again, your voice barely more than a whisper. "I... I want you," you manage to say, and the words leave your lips before you can even think about it. As soon as they're out, you feel a strange mix of embarrassment and excitement.Sang-Woo's gaze darkens at your confession, and his smile turns predatory. He moves even closer, his hand fully placed on your hip now, his touch firm and possessive as he draws you closer to him. "Good girl," he murmurs, his voice a low growl. "That's what I wanted to hear."

Sang woo drags you into his lap.Sang-Woo wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you into his lap with surprising ease. You're suddenly sitting astride him, your legs on either side of his thighs, and the position is both intimate and intensely vulnerable. His eyes are fixed on yours, his breathing heavy with desire.You can feel the heat radiating off his body, the strength of his muscles under your palms as you put your hands on his shoulders. His hands grasp your hips, fingers digging into your flesh through the thin fabric of your dress. He's in control, and you're fully aware of it. He's the one who set this situation in motion, and you're completely at his mercy.

You were shaking with excitement and Sang woo smiles "I bet you're wet" he whispers moving a finger inside your panties.Sang-Woo's words send another wave of heat through your body, and you're unable to suppress the moan that escapes your lips. You're trembling all over, and every touch of his seems to set your nerves on fire. You're both panting, your breaths mingling, and as the tip of his finger grazes your wetness, you gasp, your knees buckle, and your fingers in his shoulder.

Sang woo smiled and put two fingers inside you and hummed satisfied feeling how wet you were. "My son makes you feel like this too, hm?" he hummed moving his fingers inside your pussy.Sang-Woo's words make you shiver, and you feel a sudden pang of guilt in your chest. But his touch, his fingers inside you, are too much for you to think straight. You're lost in the sensation, consumed by the desire he elicits from you. "No," you gasp, your voice barely a whispers.

You know that what you're doing is wrong, that you should stop, but you can't. His fingers, his voice, they're like a drug, and you're addicted. The guilt and the pleasure mix inside you, a dangerous cocktail that makes your head spin. "Sang-Woo..." you breathe, and it's like a prayer, a plea, filled with need and hopelessness.Sang-Woo's smile widens, pleased with your response. He knows he has you right where he wants you, and no one will ever know about this except for the two of you. It's a secret, a moment out of time. "Yes?" he murmurs, the word wrapped around by his deep, velvety voice. He scissors his fingers inside you, drawing another moan.

You bury your face in his shoulder, unable to face him in this state. It's too much, this mixture of guilt and pleasure that clouds your mind. You're lost in a sea of sensation, and Sang-Woo is the one steering the ship. "Don't," you breathe, your words muffled against his shirt. "We shouldn't," and this time it's a plea.Sang woo adds a third finger making you scream with pleasure. "Now?" he teases you. There’s something wrong with you…You can’t stop this…

Sang-Woo’s gaze darkens as he sees the conflicting emotions in your eyes. “Don’t think,” he murmurs, his voice low and commanding. “Right now, just feel.” He fingering you with passion.

You moan and cling to him tighter. “So good,” you murmur. Your words fuel his ego and he smiles, pleased with himself. “That’s right,” he whispers, his breath hot on your ear. “It feels good, doesn’t it?” It was almost like a statement because he knew he had you in a mess.

You can feel how much this excites him, how much he enjoy the fact that he can make you react this way. And the worst part is that you enjoy every moment of it, despite knowing how wrong it is. Your body betrays you, responding to his every touch, his every word.You're drowning in an ocean of pleasure, and there's no way back. Sang-Woo is in complete control, and you're caught in a net from which there is no escape. The guilt and the desire mix to form a potion of ecstasy that keeps you hooked.

“I'm coming” you moan and then kiss him.The kiss is a desperate attempt to ground yourself, to find a anchor in the storm of emotions that threatens to overwhelm you. And Sang-Woo responds, his lips moving hungrily against yours, devouring you with an intensity that takes your breath away.You feel your body tremble as the wave of pleasure builds inside you, your fingers clinging to Sang-Woo's shirt, desperately trying to hold onto something, anything, as the world around you spins out of control. He smiles against your lips, pleased with the effect he has on you.You tremble with pleasure and come into his fingers as you moan into the kiss.

It seems like there is no break. There is no room for any other thought than that of what was going on here and it was a vicious cirlce of lust and desire. Lust that was consuming two bodies that were unable to restrain themselves and the desire to let this go on forever.Sang-Woo breaks the kiss to look at you, his eyes burning with an intense look that makes your heart beat even faster. There’s a smirk on his lips, the satisfaction of someone who knows he has you completely in his power. “You like that?” he whispers, and it’s both a question and a tease at the same time.

He takes your fingers off and licks them, moaning. "You taste so good, honey," Sang woo murmurs in satisfaction. His words make you shiver, and you can feel your body responding to his touch in ways you thought impossible. You're completely at his mercy, and he knows it. His gaze is dark, almost predatory, as he looks at you, his words filled with a mix of desire and satisfaction.

“I need more” you whisper desperately as you grind yourself against him like a bitch in heat, moaning. Sang-Woo's expression is satisfied, a dark smile on his lips. "Greedy," he whispers, tilting his head back and enjoying the sight of you so desperate. "You want more, huh?" And before you can answer, he pulls you even closer, his hands roaming over your body, exploring every inch of you.He undresses you with a satisfied smile. His eyes roam over your naked body, taking in every curve and contour. Sang-Woo murmurs an approving sound as he runs his hands over your skin, his touch possessive and hungry. "You are beautiful," he whispers, his voice low and hoarse.

Sang woo kisses and lick one of your nipples while squeezing the other. He continues this for three minutes. Then he takes it out of your mouth with a pop. You're a mess, shaking with pleasure and desire, and you can hardly think straight anymore. Sang-Woo's hands on you are like a flame that just burns brighter with every touch. You want more, you need more, and the words leave your lips unbidden. "Please..." you breathe, and it's a plea, a prayer.

"Are you that desperate to get fucked by your boyfriend's father?" Sang Woo mutters as he squeezes your nipple. His words make your heart skip a beat, and you can feel a pang of guilt mixed with desire. This was wrong, but you couldn't deny the effect he had on you. You wanted him, with a fervor that made no sense, and the shame of the situation only added to the excitement. You could only whimper in response, your body trembling with need, and you knew that he enjoyed it.

"I need you," you moan softly, the words coming out as a plea, a desperate need. It's true, you need him more than you'd like to admit, and it scares you a little."I need you," you moan softly, the words coming out as a plea, a desperate need. It's true, you need him more than you'd like to admit, and it scares you a little.

Sang woo smiles and makes you stand up for a second to pull down your pants and boxers and then you stand back up. "Tell me honey, has my son fucked you yet?" He whispers while caressing your ass.

You can almost taste the desire in the air, the forbidden longing that hangs like a heavy mist. His lips were like velvet, soft and deadly, and you couldn't get enough of them. And his words...they were like a dagger, a reminder of the terrible thing you were about to do. “No,” you replied, your voice barely a whisper.Sang woo smiles. "Good" he whispers and takes you in with a bang fucking you hard without making you adapt to his Big size.

“You’re so fucking tight” He growls fucking you harder as you moan loudly whimpering in pleasure. You ride him as he fucks you and you moan loudly screaming his name over and over again. You're a mess, trembling with pleasure and desire, and you can barely think straight, let alone utter a coherent sentence. The sound of your moans and whimpers fills the air, and they echo in both of your heads, drowning in the pleasure.“your pussy is heaven darling” Sang woo murmurs as he pushes himself harder into you.

You can barely form a thought, let alone say anything, but the words are like a prayer to you. You're lost in a world of sensation, and his name is the only thing you know to say. "Sang-Woo..." you whimper, and it's like a mantra, a plea to never stop.He's a man in control of the moment. In control of your body and mind. He knows what he's doing and how to make this pleasurable for you. He's driving you closer and closer to the edge, and you feel like you're losing your mind.He slaps your ass and nibbles your ass as he fucks you harder making you scream with pleasure.

You're beyond the point of no return now, completely his. There's no going back, no turning away from what's happening. His words, his touch, they all make you feel alive, and it's overwhelming.

"I'm cumming" you moan and Sang woo moves faster kissing your neck. "Come baby, cum on daddy's cock" Sang woo whispers. You moan at his words and come screaming "Daddy" he grunts and cums inside you.

The words escape your lips without you even realising it, and they're so natural, so unexpected. But when they're out, you feel a sense of shame mixed with satisfaction. It's like a secret you both share now, a small act of rebellion against the world

[mxbluemarine]

Hey, so remember that cyber bullying is lame as fuck and we don't like people who do that? *edited with more information

*Second edit to this post. Rot uses she/it pronouns. I know this now, but during making this post I was unaware, so below the cut I referred to her with they/them, before correcting myself in my first edit. I do apologize for misgendering her, as that was not my intention. I hope you can understand, thank you for reading

Content warning for talk of bullying, body shaming, threats of harm, joking about sexual trauma, and like, manipulation?

So the tl;dr is there's a person who I've been recently warned about that's rejoined the selfship community. They've hurt two people I know personally and care deeply for. I'm making this post because they don't wish for the attention to be on them, which I completely understand

I don't have any personal connection to this person, however I value the words of these two people (who I will call Mutual-A and Mutual-B) and I only wish for their safety and comfort. I do not want any harm or rude things sent to this blog, simply block and move on

Reblogs would be appreciated, and I ask for people to at least skim over what I talk about under the read more. I don't feel comfortable knowing that my other mutuals interact with a person who's harmed people that I care for

^ their new user name, since I don't want to type here and accidentally find this places where it shouldn't be. I do believe they had a different selfship blog here, that has since disappeared, I think they deleted it, since I had the original blocked and this one wasn't.

Now like mentioned previously, I have no ties to this person and the only "interaction" I've had with them was seeing the incredibly rude and disgusting things they've said about Mutual-A. As a nonsharer myself and someone who fights with my mental issues, I don't think shaming someone's body and outright wishing physical violence on people who share your comfort characters is a sane or normal thing to do. If these screenshots look familiar it's because they've been taken from a post about this person in the past, when this was originally happening

Again, talk of body shaming and wishes of harm (which no matter how silly is still a threat)

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As for this second person, Mutual-B, what they've been through with them was some time ago. While Mutual-B wasn't a victim of harassment to as big of scale as Mutual-A, I still think their feelings on the matter are important to highlight. I don't have screenshots of these ordeals in particular, only word of mouth, but I trust this person deeply, and never before have they tried to bad mouth anyone without reason. On multiple occasions with this person Mutual-B has told me they threatened to call out B as a p.ro.shipper, something THEY ARE NOT, simply for reblogging or interacting with posts with tags they didn't already have filtered out. I've know B for a while now and I can tell you that it's simply not true

Warning for jokes of sexual trauma/SA and manipulation

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That's all. Once again reminding to NOT attack this person, just block and move on. For a community built on self love and comfort I don't find any of this shit to be acceptable to have in it

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EDIT, because apparently we're not done here.

Since making this post, this person (will be referring to them/her as Rot) has since made a post addressing the situation. I'm also adding on more screenshots found by myself and others (apologize for the quality of some, as they're taken from my computer due to the picture limit) Going to go ahead and add another content warning for talk of SA/a character who has committed it, will add more warnings if needed

First thing Rot talks about in her post is how her interaction with Moot-A was a year and a half ago, which isn't true, right now it's been barely over a year and two months ago. I feel like this is a way to try to paint us badly by "Bringing up stuff from way back in the past", I understand a few months difference isn't much, this is a tiny nitpick I'm sure but it still didn't settle right with me. I can also understand if this was just plain misremembering.

Second point, as for the warning above, Rot makes it clear that she ships herself with a canonical rapist, J.immy from the game Mouthwashing. The fact he assaulted his coworker is incredibly important to the story of the game, there is no denying it or any chance that this could be some gross misinterpretation. Not that Rot tries to deny this. She understands who Jimmy is. She just choices to ignore it.

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And I find that really fucking disturbing. Considering how she assures people she doesn't condone his actions and how she says she takes SA seriously, then why the fuck would you even ship with him in the first place? Would also like to point out that if you do choose to ignore the worst flaw of his character... there's still so much more to him that's simply bad. But that's irrelevant/personal opinion. J.immy is a well written character and villain, I can agree, however he is a man who should not be touched with a ten foot pole

Considering a lot of her harassment towards A was about how bad A was for "mischaracterizing" a shared F/o and how A diverged from canon, and how much she disliked A for it, I find it very hypocritical for her to ignore J.immy's biggest flaw. The fact she doesn't mention his actions in game isn't something I didn't notice either, whether that's intentional or not I'm not sure, but it still feels gross

She and others also mention the character K.enjaku. However, I have not watched/read J.J.K. so I have no comment on that.

My final note on this is simply. I don't care if you ship with villains, I myself have multiple characters that are villains or bad people that I hold dearly. (this is a reason why i'm hesitant to talk about this in particular) however. There's just some things and characters you shouldn't fucking touch.

The last thing I will add to this edit is her stance on pro.shipp.ing. She's reprimanded past friends for reblogging posts from pro.shippers, she's threatened to call them out as pro.ship for it. She also pointblank puts on her blog that she doesn't want that part of the community to interact with her. Except she still continues to reblog posts with the pro tags. People make mistakes, but the fact she's scolded and threatened people for doing the same while these posts get to stay on her blog upsets me

**I've also been given screenshots of dark content she's reblogged. Now I do agree with the statement that dabbling in darker themes with ships is fine (there's some big scary ""n*ance"" in that comment). I won't shame someone for enjoying fucking idk kidnapping or unhealthy relationship dynamics. Again, I don't think I'm the right person to play holier than thou on a high horse, but I feel it's worth mentioning since someone went as far as to send me those screenshots.

Warning for allusions to SA in the 3rd/nonfiltered post

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^^ last screenshot is added simply because nonsharervents has a "bad rep" because OP is neutral to/allows pro.shippers to interact

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[saphirafoxgirlspost1]

(Open Rp) "How to Create a Perfect Man"

A Long time Ago In the Good Neighborhood, Saphira had been married to A Decent man name "Daniel Landus Rooster" For Seventeen years..Or So She thought..During the Seventeen years of marriage, Saphira Caught him Cheating On Her With her Neighbor Name Lydia and Lydia is too Married as well…and Saphira Scolded Daniel So harshly..that she will threaten him to call his parents about this..Daniel Knew what His parents is Capable of, He Knew His parents "HATES" Cheating and all..So Daniel begged Saphira forgiveness and all..Saphira decided to Give him a Last chance..but one condition..He has to Wear a chasity belt as Punishment, She asked How long is he and lydia had been having an affair and then he said 3 Months..so she said to him as punishment, He has to wear a Chasity belt For 3 months and Daniel look defeated.. Lydia's Husband however began to dragged Lydia out and Made a huge Scolding and began to Divorce her clean out.. Three Months Has Passed and the chasity belt is off from daniel. On the Seventeenth Year, Saphira was ready to Have a Seventeen Year Anniversary Dinner set up..until She heard the Ruckus.. Then she went upstairs and began to take a look of whats going on And There Saphira Saw him and Her other Neighbor name "Claudia" is making love..Then She began to Slammed the door Open as the two in bed Froze in shock when they see Saphira with a Wrathful look on her face..and She said,

Saphira: "DANIEL! WHAT IN THE NAME OF THE SMILING DEVIL IS GOING ON HERE!!!??"

Daniel:"Saph! I Can explain!! This Isn't what it looks like!"

Saph:" Oh I Know what it Looks like! It Looks like you and My Neighbor is Making beast with two backs on OUR WEDDING ANNIVERSARY!!!"

Daniel yelped as Claudia was trying to escape..but the Husband Came in and he said,

Husband: "CLAUDIA! WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH MR. ROOSTER!!??"

Claudia: "Honey I can Explain!"

Husband: " Your making love with a Married man!! How could you do this!?"

Claudia: "Don't put this on me! Your the one who's sleeping around with other Women!"

Then saphira Cut in

Saph: " WHOA WHOA WHOA!! What!? Do you really tell me that The Neighbor hood Husbands cheats on wives, And Now Wives Cheats on husband! AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO'S FAITHFUL HERE!!?"

Saphira was Hell raising Angry when her face turns red..and steaming coming out of her head clean..

Saphira:" Since When the Whole Neighborhood Became a FUCKING NEIGHBORHOOD WHOREHOUSES!!!?? Turns to daniel Daniel! Is there Something I should Know about it? Hmm?!"

Daniel: looked defeated and ashamed "Yes..I've Slept with 55 Different women..plus claudia..including the 5 others before marriage."

Saph: eye widen and began to go into rage " You…WHAT!??? How Could you do this to me!? Your telling me..that you've been sleeping around with 61 women this whole time!!??"

Then Daniel Nodded with shame and defeat, Then Saphira said Something that Everyone will be shocked

Saph: " THATS IT!! Daniel Landus Rooster! We Are getting a DIVORCE!! And I'm going to Sue Your 61 Whore of yours and I hope you Will Pay the Settlement Fee along With your 61 harlots!! You better be Lucky that we don't Have Kids..because I'm going to be Feeling guilty about this..and every child who is Born affair..WILL NEVER BE HAPPY! And Also Daniel..I'm Calling your parents and tell Them about this..and Boy…You better be Prepare what Will happen When I'm Done with you!"

Daniel: " Oh god! Please Not my parents!! They'll Sent me Away to Gentleman School again! It's Like hell!"

Saph:" Well Thats Too Goddamn Bad! You Shouldn't Cheat on me in the first place, and Yet you did! with 61 Different women! Enough is Enough! I regret Giving you a last chance and I should've Divorce you when I got a Chance, So We're getting a Divorce and THATS FINAL! and I'm Selling this House and Move away from this.. Neighborhood of Infidelities! I will Not Live with anyone Who would became a Serial Cheater!"

After the Confrontation, Saphira Called His parents and Told Them everything. When They Heard Saphira about Daniel and all, they were So Livid that they head there and Made Daniel Sign the divorce Papers Which Daniel was so Stubborn to sign it until His Father Threaten him to Cut ties if he Didn't Sign it…So Next day, She sued 61 different women for settlement fee..All of them paid her in Huge Lump sum and So does Daniel whom he's the Source of all the troubles.. After She Sell the House..She Moved away to a Nice Country Side where they Have a Nice Big Small town Full of good decent people.. But 4 years had passed, Saphira Felt a bit empty in Her heart but..She Blamed Herself For giving her "Ex" Husband a Second Chance, However this Doesn't Stop to find a Good decent man better than Daniel Rooster. Meanwhile at the Lab that Saphira made a great Buisness there..but There was a Slime Creature that was sealed up in the glass chamber and sees the Picture of Saphira as the Daughter of the CEO On the wall..it can't help but fell in love with her..but then Her father complain that She needs a man who would love her,,a man who is strong and kind and very Protective to her..and be there when she needed the most…as the slime creature heard what he said, He had a plan to escape and that night..he Broke out and began to see the Absorbing elixir and then he drank up and began to hunt down a good strong men..and went to the small town..and found alot of good looking and strong men..as one by one..it absorbs them..and when it went behind her home..and suddenly..the skeleton hand emerge from the slime..and the rest of it..and the slime began to cover the skeleton and transforms into a One handsome Man that saphira's father wanted Saphira to have…as He comes to the door..and knocks on it..as Saphira opens the door..and she said," hello?" Then he answered…

[madamechrissy]

He tries to fuck her at the party! HE TRIES TO FUCK HER AT THE PARTY!!! Reader said she doesn’t want a purely sexual relationship AND THE FIRST THING HE DOES WHEN THEY SEE EACHTOHER AGAIN IS KISS AND FINGER HER!!!! Reader baby STAND UP! She was gonna do it if they weren’t interested 😭 hold your ground, don’t let this man back in so easy

I wanna kiss Jenna so bad!!! I love her 🧡🧡🧡 #1 bestie fr. And the obligatory ngh nanami 😫!!! Also the muffins can’t be that good that it got both men moaning 😭 calm yourself

Congratulations to gojo FINALLY wanting to change careers. Can’t have your cake and eat it too 😒 dumb bitch. I don’t know how it is for men but I know woman typically have a hard time finding a job when they quit sex work. With all the stigma they don’t get taken seriously and no one wants to work with them because sex work is typically looked down upon. I know he’s hot and good looking and rich and whatever but I want him to STRUGGLE. Not saying he should be shamed or anything.

Ok I think I feel better now. Amazing chapter!! ILY CHRISSY!!!🧡🧡🧡🧡

Ily too pookie!!!

I really wanna show with Gojo just how emotionally stunted he is, and how he equates sex to affection due to his very fked up past. The older pornstar gf and him being a poor lil nerdy virgin at the time skewed him and of he is traumatized ✨️✨️✨️ as I love to make all my characters bc I'm rly fked up mentally 😭😭

Im glad you see this bc so many people are mad at reader for telling him to leave and I actually don't get them. Why shouldn't she at least try to remove herself when he ignored two love confessions and her wishes? She is helpless when it comes to him so she just has to avoiddddd

The chap had me so upset bc I want them happy but they're both so stupid lol 😆 next chap we get a time skip then get sm more development without the sexual! 🫶

Edit to add the muffins were that good 💀

[ickytreats]

A virgin gets sick and is told by her doctor that the cure is to have sex. Her parents send a man up to her bedroom to seduce her. She's scared at first (she wanted to be a virgin forever) but when they start doing it she realizes that sex isn't so bad after all...

(Inspired by a Wikipedia page about hypochromic anemia; it used to be called "the disease of virgins." A historical/fantasy setting would be nice, but no need to be super accurate! I'd like to see what you can do with it)

-🎥

Oh this is going to be so fun omg. I only read 2 articles on it so bare with me.

Written about adults.

She had lasted so long, keeping to herself. Saying she'd wait for marriage, just to get sick. She was frustrated she didn't want a man to touch her...she was scared. But when the doctors told her parents she needed to have sex to get better her heart dropped. Yes, men often came around wanting her hand but she'd always reject. If they asked her father instead of her he'd reject only wanting what's best for his daughter.

But she was a woman, this would happen eventually. She sits in the corner of her bed looking at the familiar older man standing in front of her as he strips his coat. One of the older men that always was nice to her who secretly wanted her.You're parents sent me up... I'm here to help cure you. He walks over and she tries to back up more, I won't. But you're sick, you don't know what's best for you. The man takes a seat on her bed, your parents are worried. I'll get better on my own, you're already pale as is. I'll take good care of you... She tenses up, many women with the same disease as her haven't married to get cured. Insane but they'd only marry if they ended with a child.

He knew this was wrong, using her sickness as a way to get her. But he couldn't help himself, this was his chance. I'll start slow...I was chosen because your parents trust me. It's not that I don't trust you too, then let me help you. His hand touches her leg making her gasp and pull back. I've got you, he trails his hand up her leg pushing one of her layers up. I don't- I know darling I do but we don't want you to get worse. You've already had a spell we don't want you to have more. He gently pulls her closer, I really thought I could last. I know you did but now this is for the best. He puts a hand on her cheek, you'll be fine. He leans in and softly kisses her making her tense up. She whines and pulls away feeling awkward, I can't. It's t-too weird! She gasps and tries to crawl back again only to be grabbed. You said you trust me? She nods then trust me, darling. Let me help you, cure you, and everything will be okay.

He pulls her in for another kiss, this time his grip on her tight. Not letting her pull away when she gets nervous or doubts. He lays her down on her sheets and keeps pushing her white gown up as he settles between her legs. See? Nice and steady. He trails kisses down her neck, to her chest, and he feels her tense up again. I'll lose some layers first...then you will follow. As he goes to his knees he trails his hands down her body to let her get used to the touch but it makes her shiver. She shyly watches as he loses his button up, how he goes to undo his uniform pants. She can't help but look at how him, how his cock bulges, how he has no shame, and how he keeps reassuring her as he does.

Nothing to be ashamed about. He leans down over her again, she gasps when she feels his cock against her. Looking away and squirming I really can't do this a-and before marriage?...it's so wrong! I already told you, Darling. Your parents want you healthy, this is happening. He pulls her up and goes to undo her dress, loosening the straps, pulling at the sleeves as she whines. It's cold, it will get hot soon. He pulls her dress off softly dropping it on the floor, and she quickly covers herself. A beauty like you shouldn't be afraid to show off, and be a whore? No thank you. You are not a whore if it is for your well being.

Before she can respond his lips are on hers once again. Must I burn the candles out? He trails his kisses once again down her neck, she doesn't respond so he nips at her neck making her whine and grab his arm. No, I'd like to see what you will do... moonlight isn't enough? He teases as he lays her down and a hand finds her breast. Toying with them as she looks at him and squirms. Stop that, just get it over with. I'm trying to make it nice and memorable for you, darling. She shivers when his hand trails down her stomach. Open them for me? He taps her thighs and she shakes her head. Please, don't make me be mean. Not today, she knew he was strong, she knew he could've skipped all this, so she shyly spreads her legs for him. Only a little just enough he can spread them himself. She gasps and quickly covers herself with her hands.

Darling, you're making this harder on yourself. He sighs and firmly grabs her wrists pulling them away. One of his hands holds her wrists and the other trails down her cunt, Your body is reacting appropriately. She shivers at his touch and can't help but start to pant. Calm down, I said I got you he lets go of her wrist and brings a hand to his cock. Stroking it as he glances up at her, it will hurt for a second. She shakes her head please-...sir, I'm scared I- I know that, I know you are but it's needed for your health. Runs the tip of his cock over her wetness and she whines at the feeling. It's going to be all okay, my dear. He mumbles softly as he pushes into her, her nails quickly dig into his skin and she whimpers.

Wait! Her voice is strained but he kisses her, tries to distract her as he keeps on bullying his cock into her. He grunts against her lips as she whimpers, her nails are scratching his back as he keeps giving her his length. Once he bottoms out he lets her sniffle against him, such a good job. He pants and moans at how tight she is, fighting to just fuck her. Hurts, it's so much, you're so much! It's so deep, you're so deep! She babbles and looks at him with glossy eyes. It's fine, he pets her hair and kisses her cheek. It's just for a second, she shakes her head and whines. He starts to move his hips and she gasps grabbing him. That's- going to feel so good.

She whines and bites his shoulder, her mind is racing not believing he is doing this. Not believing she is doing this! It feels weird, it's so much yet there's butterflies in her stomach. Her back arches when he hits a spot, sir! I know darling, I can tell. That feels good doesn't it? That spot makes you shake, right? I'll handle it, you just take it and get cured. He groans as he keeps thrusting in and out of her. The head of his cock abusing that yummy spot. She starts to shake and her eyes tear up again, pull away. That's- I'm- I feel, she can't get her words out. A orgasm, darling. It is called an orgasm and you will let it go and it will feel so good. He looks her in the eyes and nods his head, let go. It's alright you are alright.

Finally she nods her head and moans as she falls apart under him. She swears she saw stars as he keeps fucking her. His pace doesn't slow, now that she is more pliant he keeps fucking her quicker. Making her moan and babble random words, see how good? See how curing you will be a breeze? Dear God...you're going to make me- he cuts himself off with a loud moan. Not yet...I can't yet, I want one more from you. He kisses her, I can't do another...she whimper but she wants another. She wants it so bad, you can I know you can. Just focus, it feels good doesn't it? No more fear, no more questions, just a pretty lady getting cured.

She nods her head and moans, yes! Your curing me, she looks up at him. Thank you so much for- she can't finish her words as another orgasm rocks her. Causing her to buckle under him grinding up into him as she pushes him over the edge with her own. They pant as they lay there in each other's arms, she was tired but antsy. She can't believe she wanted more, this was wicked. This was going to be torture, how would she find more not being wed? What if...I'm still sick? Then... You'd stay with me. Stay with you? Marry me...if you want to be cured properly. She glances at him and presses closer, I'd like to be cured properly.

This was so fun. I was so torn if I should make it so he'd be stuck up, takes advantage of the "sickness" just to fuck women outside of wed. But I went with this route

[perfctvelvet]

pt.2 for your kylie jenner ficcccc

pairing: Kylie Jenner/Reader

Summary: College!AU. After hooking up with each other, Kylie finds herself looking at her best friend in a different light. Part two to this fic.

content: 2nd POV. AU, Friends with benefits, teasing, slight (very slight) slut-shaming, teasing, dirty talk, oral sex.

There's a first time for everything, and what happened on their night together was something Kylie didn't want to stop. One time had quickly turned into two which snowballed into 4, 5 more times. She had made a promise to you two were best friends, and best friends would do anything for others. Even if that thing was 2 am booty calls.

Over the course of the fall semester the hook-ups between you two became more frequent until it got to a once a week point. There was always some excuse attached to it.

"I'm stressed because of this exam."

"I couldn't hook-up with what-their-face, so now I'm horny."

"I'm bored."

They were excuses that really weren't needed, but it was always Kylie who seemed to need to cover her tracks whenever she came over to your apartment. Every time you welcomed her in and accepted her advances because that's what best friends do. Her sex drive was unsurprisingly much higher than yours and she was the main one who was coming back time and time again for more. You chalked it up to a streak of bad luck of not being able to find a suitable partner despite the number of people on campus. A first you felt like a back-up choice, but once you saw that you were the first choice you felt appreciated instead of used. Quickly the friendship was turning into one with benefits and you didn't complain because you got to get off too with someone who is so eager to please like Kylie. It was just something to pass the time for you, which isn't exactly how Kylie saw it.

At this point Kylie felt like you two were a couple and that's all that should matter. She was allowed to be more affectionate with you without it causing the air to turn stiff. You were receptive to her kisses, hugs, and even cuddled her. But this all happened in the privacy of your respective apartments when Kylie wanted something more.

It wouldn't be hard to go out and find someone else to give her the same thing, but Kylie began to question whether or not someone else could provide her with the same feeling you do. She doesn't know which night in particular it was, but somewhere along the line something in here was triggered and she found herself looking at you in a very different light. However, she wasn't bold enough to come out and ask you what all of this meant. Instead she knew the only way to get her answers was to play it coy and see what she could get you to admit.

The outfits got skimpier, the nights got dirtier, and sometimes it was on display for people to see.

Not wanting to be patronizing, but you cautioned Kylie about letting loose a little too much. You had seen her act like is before and knowing her so much you knew she was doing this for someone. Who that person is is unknown to you, but you just knew that she was being extra to grab the attention of somebody. Her posts online got more frequent with pictures that bordered on scandalous. They were the most thirst-trappiest pictures you've ever seen. Though you began to feel bad when you tried giving Kylie a warning because you saw how her face fell. You stumbled through your words as you tried to walk it back, not trying to shame your best friend, but little did you know that that wasn't the issue for her. You weren't fawning over her like she had intended. You saw all the make-up she had put on and the cleavage she showed and didn't have a single thing to say about it. She only sat there pouting at you because she felt like you were so oblivious.

"It doesn't matter what you post, I'm sorry. It's not my place to say what you should or shouldn't do."

"No, it's okay Y/n. You're just looking out for me."

You're not convinced by her words due to the tone of her voice. Kylie avoids even looking at you now and you feel like an asshole. That's when you realize the only way to remedy this is to make her forget about what you said in some other way.

"Why don't you come over?"

"Right now?" Kylie asked as if she wouldn't drop everything and be there at a moment's notice. You could tell her to jump and she'd say how high. It was almost scary to her how quickly she became infatuated with you.

"Yeah, why not? I'm here alone and I'm sure we can find something to watch."

Both of you knew nobody was going to be watching anything, but you felt a little sheepish just asking her to come over and fuck so you can make up for practically slut-shaming her. Kylie took the bait though and appeared at your door in five minutes. You didn't leave that far away from her, but five minutes feels like record timing for Kylie.

She drops her bag at the front door and leaves her keys on the kitchen island like she owns the place. Your roommate was gone for the weekend which she commonly did so that made your place the spot for your rendezvous with your best friend. Kylie suggested that you two should get a place together next school year, but you're not sure how it would work with living with your fuck buddy. As much as you enjoyed the moments of touching and pleasing each other, Kylie was still your friend at the end of the day and you were treading carefully to not ruin that.

However, you weren't careful enough because before either of you could make it to the bedroom (or hell even the couch), you were making out with each other.

The way Kylie touched you, the way she kissed you, you knew she must have a week's worth of tension built up. Last weekend was busy which meant you two didn't see each other at all. You have gone a whole summer without seeing Kylie, yet you've never seen her act like this before. It crosses your mind that perhaps you're opening an entire can of worms with this situation, but those thoughts quickly melt away when you feel Kylie cup your pussy through your pajama shorts.

"Someone's fucking eager," you say breathlessly between kisses. Every word that comes out of your mouth you manage to make it sound teasing. Kylie felt her heart squeeze and her pussy was getting wetter at the thought of you taunting her some more.

"I can't help it."

I missed you.

Kylie had to bite back every word she truly wanted to say, but it came out in the feverish kiss she pressed to your lips, cheek, and neck. You let her take control for just a brief moment because you knew how things ended up going. She will get needy and whiny, begging for you to fuck her, make her cum, just do whatever to her body that makes her feel good. Every time you happily oblige.

"Let's not fuck out here," you tell her, grabbing her hand to move it away from between your legs. Instead you grab it and lead her to your bedroom.

Each step down the hall Kylie feels her breath getting shorter. She has walked down this hall countless times before, but each time it gets harder as her secret wants to bubble up to the surface. It's always you, who is oblivious to her feelings, that drags her out of those thoughts. You push down onto the bed and crawl between her legs. Your soft lips capture hers again and this time you're the one in control. Call her selfish, but Kylie liked to just lay back and let you do whatever to her. She was a little lazy after you'd made her cum two or three times, but she was never a bad friend and she made sure to return the favor.

"I wanna try something new tonight," you mention coyly as you begin to pull down her sweatpants.

"Oh yea? What's that?"

"I really want to play with your ass tonight."

Lust dripped off of every word and it echoed in Kylie's head. The very first time you hooked-up with each other, you couldn't get enough of her ass and you still felt that way. The way her thick ass jiggle every time you slapped it or the noises it made when your skin joined together had you feeling like such a pervert. There had been times when you two had gone out with friends and Kylie drunkenly danced on you, her thick ass pressing into you. It drove you crazy. You wanted to drag her into the dingy bathroom stalls and get on your knees and eat her ass until she was moaning louder than the music that vibrated the walls. To say you were obsessed would be an understatement, but you always kept your play to just smack and grab her ass. Tonight you wanted things to be different.

Kylie just blinked at you for a few seconds. The hesitation was something new, and she had an unreadable look in her eyes. This is something she's never done before, and you know that, so she wonders if this will make things different between you two.

"Okay," she says breathlessly, but the affirmation just isn't enough for you. You want to hear her beg for it, but you let the moment simmer for a second.

You kiss between the valley of her breasts and look up at her like you're so grateful for her decision. Kylie wonders if you can feel her heart thumping against her chest. These feelings feel so unnatural to have for someone who is just supposed to be her best friend, but when you're kissing her and caressing her body, it's when she lets those feelings come out through her actions.

Kylie arches her back to try to feel more of your lips on her skin. You smirk at how she becomes like putty in your hands. You run your hands up her back, lifting her tank top in the process. Kylie feels you grab the latch of her bra and free her tits from the constraint of the fabric. She lifts her arms to help you pull her shirt off and she lays in front of you in nothing but some panties you were going to discard in seconds.

"You're so fucking sexy."

You bite into your bottom lip after making your confession. Sometimes you wonder if your words are a little too crass, but seeing that you've had your tongue buried inside of her cunt before, what you have to do is tame in comparison to what you're going to do to her tonight.

Kylie spreads her legs, her pussy lips spreading in the process. As much as she wanted you to dive in, you took your time. It was nothing but sweet torture as you caressed her soft skin and teased her dripping pussy. She knows exactly what you're waiting for and she willingly gives it to you.

"Please, Y/n...don't tease me today...I need you so bad."

You were taken by surprise at her bold declarative, especially knowing that you were going to be pushing her limit a little today. You almost feel bad for her when you notice the little pout on her plump lips. She's too spoiled, you think to yourself, but you're the one who's guilty of giving into her.

"What do you want me to do?"

"Eat my pussy...please?"

Since she asked so politely, you bury your face in her needy twat. Kylie's moan punches the air and she already begins to grind her pussy against your mouth. You were overwhelmed by the taste of her flooding your senses. This is probably your tenth time eating her pussy and you're surprised that tasting her always feels like the first time. She was the first pussy you've ever tasted in your life and you're not sure anyone can top her. Your mouth has grown to become skillful as you learned what exactly to do to drive her crazy. Kylie loved when you explored her pussy with your tongue only to find its way under the hood of her clit and pressing right into that sensitive bundle of nerves. It was hard for you to understand how she could withstand the onslaught of pleasure, but she barely did. In seconds her body began to thrash and she was shaking. An orgasm in two minutes would be record fucking timing, but seeing how she's acting you wanted to do it.

"Oh my god, Y/n!" She cries out your name like the sweetest melody.

As much as this is for her pleasure, eating her pink pussy gets you worked up too. You snaked your hand between your legs and the bed and began to rub yourself through your panties. If only Kylie could see how you were dripping right now because eating her pussy turns you on so much. You were moaning into her cunt so much that it sent vibration after vibration through her body. It felt so good, overwhelming, but absolutely good.

"I'm gonna cum! Make me fucking cum!"

The way she always begs make you eat or fuck her faster; this time was no different. You wrap your lips around her clit while your tongue assaults the precious button that cracks her wide open. You look up at her to see her pretty face scrunched in pleasure with one hand groping her breast and the other groping your purple bed sheets. She was going to leave a dripping mess on your bed, but you didn't give a damn. You wanted to encourage her to cum against your mouth, but you also didn't want to pull away from her precious pussy.

Kylie cums against your mouth with a strangled cry leaving her throat. You reluctantly pull your hand away from  your own pussy, but her hips buck so much that you have to hold her down. There is a slight pain in the way you roughly handle her that adds to Kylie's pleasure. "Yes! Yes! Yes!" She cries out loudly with no regard for which one of your neighbors could hear her.

"Holy shit! Y/n! I love....I-I love it!"

In the hard hitting daze of her orgasm, Kylie almost fucked up and made a confession. She loves what you're doing to her. She loves how you stretch her asshole out. She loves how you make her feel good and give attention. The rush of endorphins raging in her body had her feeling in love. It may not be love, but it feels somewhat close to it.

You watch with lust as your best friend's body shakes and ultimately collapses like an old bridge against the bed. Your hand had fallen from her clit, but you still had two fingers in her asshole. You didn't dare stop pumping them in and out of her tight hole. The sensitive ring had grown accustomed to the size of the fingers in it, so much so that when you did pull out there was the tiniest gape you've ever seen. You thought it was just as adorable as your friend's flushed out face.

"Come here, Ky."

It was rare that you ever held or cuddled Kylie after fucking her. It felt a little too intimate for what you too are, but you figure that after getting her ass fingered for the first time she needed some comfort. She laid comfortably in your arms, fitting like a puzzle piece. You didn't think much about it, just that your best friend was feeling a little bit more needy that showed through affection. You had no clue that every second that past your friend slipped deeper into her feelings for you.

[alllgator-blood]

hymns of the unholy drops tomorrow, I'm gonna make a track tier list but here's my initial thoughts before it comes out:

This feels worthy of a "read more" just because there's no pictures to look at and it's four paragraphs. TL;DR the album is very cheesy but I'm literally so excited I'm gonna stay up all night so I can listen to the new album the second it drops. The overly critical part of my brain is telling me I shouldn't derive enjoyment from this album unironically but I'm not gonna obey, I am cringe and free and I'm gonna crank this shit with no shame cause it's the game I like...IN MUSIC FORm

[gif meant to represent me randomly busting it down leshy style when I'm home alone, and singing "THE END AWAITS AS THE OLD FAITH TAKES THE LAST OF MY KIIIIINDDDD" over and over]

The lamb's song was kickass and if I heard it in the wild without knowing there was a metal album for this game, I'd spontaneously combust from sheer excitement. It's instantly recognizable and that's kinda all I wanted from it tbh! I've mentioned before that I'm way more of a djent/shoegaze/sludge fan when it comes to metal rather than the genre these songs have been, but I'm literally so excited the bishops are getting some kind of inclusion in a project that I'm gonna crank this album even if it reminds me of the shadow the hedgehog game soundtrack. Tbh this one is so solid that if they JUST announced this one and didn't make the others, I'd still think it'd stand alone quite well for what it is! Edit: I said I'm cringe and free, why did I spend half this section dunking on the genre.....

Leshy's song..........was totally lame but in an epic way, like the first time I listened to it I thought it was fine! But when I actually read the lyrics I had tears streaming down my face from laughter. I screamed out loud when the guy basically says "btw my name is leshy :)", the lyrics are actually so fucking bad. But c'mon it's LESHY he's the littlest brother, if anyone got a corny ass song it should really be him. The shredding solo at the end is fucking hilarious and if he was in charge of his own song, he 10000% would request that specific ending. Musically, this one sounds the least like the source material so far but it's got that arpeggio from his + amdusias' theme and that's arguably the most iconic part. Also, "DAYLIGHT WILL COME UNDONE AS WE ECLIPSE THE SUN" is insane and is the best part besides describing his blindness as "ETERNAL NIGHTFALL"

Heket's song...........It has my favorite lyrics so far but the vocal work after the 40 second mark had to grow on me. I can't describe it but it sounds like that post grunge style and as a grunge fan, post grunge is my biggest opp in the music world. I was hoping they'd get a female singer for this but for heket specifically I can understand why they didn't. The actual lyrics in the song are fuckin badass, when it gets to the "MAKE YOUR PEACE, CREATURE" part I always turn it up to a deafening volume because it goes BALLISTIC. Genuinely my favorite part of any of these songs so far. I adore that her characterization in this song is layered and isn't just "I'm leshy, I'm made of plants or something and also I'm gonna kill you", it goes through her arc PERFECTLY imo!! Instrumentals in this one are better than the leshy song as well, I really like that they brought back the pitch bending/choppy sampling from the ost for this one

I'm on my hands and knees begging for the shamura song to be good, the leshy song had me worried but they came in clutch for heket. If they don't work in shamura's iconic lines from the game, I'm gonna cry inside I think- I'll forgive a lame kallamar song but ONLY if it's funny. Narinder's theme is gonna be hard to fuck up imo I have faith it'll be top tier

[seb-boo]

Sebastian Vettel Interview with Tages-Anzeiger [2025-03-09] English Translation ↴

[It's Tuesday lunchtime. Excited pupils stream out of a school in the Zurich Unterland. They have just had a visit from four-time Formula 1 world champion Sebastian Vettel. The German, who has lived in Switzerland since 2007 and in the canton of Thurgau since 2009, attracted attention in the last few years of his career by suddenly talking about environmental issues, such as the importance of biodiversity, or collecting litter in the grandstands after race weekends.

This Tuesday, the 37-year-old and Andreas Fehr debated the topic of the circular economy with four classes. Fehr is the owner of a fashion label and the topic was sustainability in the clothing industry. Vettel spoke about the possibilities of more environmentally friendly mobility. Afterwards, the former racing driver took time for a personal discussion.]

Sebastian Vettel, are you driven by a guilty conscience?

That was perhaps the case at the beginning of my involvement, when I thought: Oh, I've been racing and flying around the world for so many years, that wasn't good! Now it's much more optimism that drives me.

What do you mean?

When people talk about the climate crisis, many things are very, very bad, the outlook is devastating, the mood is doomsday. Children see their future as correspondingly bleak. It's important to me that we talk about solutions. There are a lot of people who have great ideas. Like in the textile industry, where there are so many approaches to greater sustainability. Today's children are much more perceptive and have a greater awareness of these issues. I had no idea about it when I was young. Of course I knew that you don't just throw things away, but I didn't know anything about the meaning behind it.

How environmentally conscious are you?

I am in a position of luxury. I have the time to deal with these issues and also the opportunity to afford alternatives. Fast fashion is advertised, it's tempting to buy two or three T-shirts at once. Our aim is to show that they don't last long and that someone is paying the price - the planet, the environment, the people in the production chain. It all starts with awareness. If you are aware of things, you can change things. I want to raise this awareness in the children.

You were a racing driver, you jetted around the world. Can you erase this huge ecological footprint?

I could by buying the relevant certificates. I did that before I retired in 2022. But that raises questions: does that really balance the books? There are many great projects that are perhaps not implemented so well. Planting trees is a great tool. But are the right trees being planted? In the right location? Are they being cared for? Will the tree still be standing in five years' time? Receiving such a certificate eases the conscience, but it is often worth taking a closer look. Even ticking a box when you fly is not enough. It is therefore very difficult to completely eradicate my footprint.

Where is it particularly large?

Flying accounts for the largest share. It's like other global sports. The fact that I then drove a car in circles and burned gasoline is no longer so important.

And today you are campaigning for environmental issues: are you a hypocrite?

I have to put up with this accusation. And yes: I am the biggest hypocrite there is when I talk about environmental issues and at the same time leave such a big footprint. I flew around the world for years - and not economy, but business or first class. But do I have to feel bad about it? We won't solve the problem with shame, but rather by confronting it and looking for solutions. We are all hypocrites because we also enjoy things that we know are not so good. Do we have to go on vacation to Thailand? No. But it's also incredibly beautiful there. We shouldn't ban travel, but offer technological options that allow us to do the same things as before - only more sustainably.

You and your family are often on the road in a camper.

Yes, we pitch up at the campsite and are a normal camper family. When I'm recognized, some people are amazed, but after the first beer together that's over.

How much did your childhood influence you in this respect?

Very much, we spent weekend after weekend on the road in our camper van, which was really great. Camping is also about memories and experiences that I want my children to have.

You have two daughters, who are 9 and 11, and a five-year-old son: do you feel you have missed out on parts of your childhood because of your career?

After I retired, I realized that I was on the road a lot more than I meant to be. When I was still fully involved, I thought: I'll be back home soon, just a few days and then I'll be back. When I stepped back, I realized that I had slept away more than at home. I'm enjoying having a completely different everyday life now.

Are you happy in your role as a father?

It's nice that I have time. I can also look back on a very rich childhood of my own, in which I was able to spend a lot of time with my parents and siblings. This time together is the most beautiful thing that my parents gave me - and I now live that too. Even if I don't travel from kart track to kart track with my children like we did back then.

Why not?

It hasn't turned out that way yet.

Does racing even have a future and a raison d'��tre?

That is a very good question. While interest in Formula 1 is constantly growing in America, people in countries like Germany are questioning whether it still fits in with the times. If Formula 1 doesn't move fast enough and find answers to important questions, it runs the risk of social pressure becoming so great that a ban will be discussed.

What questions does Formula 1 need to ask itself?

How are the cars refueled? How does the whole circus get from A to B? Hundreds of thousands of people travel to the races: How do they get there, how do they travel home, what do they consume on site, what food and drink is on offer anyway? There are a lot of issues involved. I would certainly find it a great pity if Formula 1 were to disappear.

Why is that?

There are many people who appreciate the sport on the one hand, but also the culture behind it on the other. It's a piece of history and cultural heritage, especially in Germany, where the automotive industry is very big and has a long history. You can't simply erase that. So Formula 1 basically has a right to exist. But in terms of vehicles and technology, it has to move on.

Formula 1 cars already have highly efficient hybrid engines, and from 2026 they will also be running on synthetic fuel.

Yes, thanks to this fuel, CO₂-neutral driving is possible. But synthetic fuel is not a panacea. The major drawback is the high electricity consumption during production, regardless of whether petrol, diesel or kerosene is being produced. The process is inefficient - while the electricity would actually be needed everywhere else, for example for heating buildings. Synthetic fuels are a bridging technology for forms of mobility for which we do not yet have any other solutions, such as shipping or air travel. There are no electric or hydrogen-powered container ships or airplanes yet.

And what about private transportation?

The electric car is much more efficient and has a higher degree of efficiency than a combustion engine. However, it is not fair to ask people to buy electric cars, as they are even more expensive than combustion engines. They need to become cheaper - the range also needs to increase and the network needs to be better developed.

The reality is this: There are 1.3 billion cars with combustion engines on the road around the world.

And for them, synthetic fuel makes sense as a transition. But if we think ahead, 30, 40 years into the future, it is important that the rich countries set the pace, set a good example and make the transition to electromobility.

What does your personal fleet look like?

It's not yet purely electric because I want to keep my VW bus, which runs on diesel. I also have an electric Porsche - okay, a Porsche - but also an electric Nissan.

You live in the country in Europe with the best developed public transport system. How often can you be found on the train?

I travel by public transport very often. Zurich is the perfect example of how it makes no sense to travel around a city by car. And that's a key: if the offer is there and public transport beats the car in terms of attractiveness, people are more likely to switch. In general, Switzerland is the model country, you can get to the most remote villages by post bus, the connections are great and the timetable is perfectly timed. Public transport has to be a real alternative everywhere, then people will change their minds.

Was it the same for you?

I was influenced by motor sports in my childhood and counted the days until I could get my driver's license. It was still important to my grandfather that his car had a star on it, our generation also drove other brands, and today's children often have completely different priorities anyway. So walls come tumbling down and new things emerge. The future can also be better than the present. If there is less traffic in cities, more electric cars, more public transport, that is better for everyone.

When you're on trains and buses, aren't you constantly recognized and harassed?

Of course I get recognized sometimes, but I appreciate the fact that the Swiss are very discreet. It's very different in Germany or other countries.

Is that one of the reasons why you moved to Switzerland in 2007?

That's the main reason why I want to stay here. I feel very comfortable. The initial spark was that I was a test driver at Sauber - even though I then quickly switched to Toro Rosso. I liked it here. And of course there were also tax advantages. But I would also have those in the place where many of my ex-colleagues live.

You're talking about Monaco. Why don't you live on the Côte d'Azur?

Switzerland is incredibly beautiful, a paradise. Monaco is certainly also beautiful and a bit warmer, but living in such a concrete jungle wouldn't be for me. I need space, mountains and nature.

Michael Schumacher has also lived in Switzerland for years. You always looked up to him.

He's the hero of my childhood and, in my opinion, the greatest Formula 1 driver in history, even if statistically speaking it's Lewis (Hamilton).

Since his skiing accident in 2013, Schumacher has been cared for at home in Gland, Vaud. You still have contact with the family through his son Mick, how important is that to you?

I get on well with Mick and we keep in touch, even though I no longer race and he no longer has a cockpit in Formula 1. That is important to me.

Michael's brother Ralf Schumacher recently made headlines because he came out as gay. That is …

… a taboo. Just like in many other sports. If we look at the statistics, many tennis and football players would have to be homosexual. But it's still very difficult to come out and be accepted in sport.

Why is that the case?

Let's take football: if a player comes out and then has to bend down for the ball before a throw-in, for example, there are bound to be many in the stands who burst out laughing. That's why role models who have the courage to come out are so important. I don't know if I could speak openly about it myself. That's why we should appreciate it when someone does.

How was Schumacher's coming out received in the motorsport scene?

Good, actually. But of course, motorsport is still a world where old white men have a petrol party. Some things are taboo for many. Lewis has already broken down many walls as the first black Formula 1 driver. He brought up the subject of racism and other things that were suddenly being talked about. I came into Formula 1 at the same time as him, I remember there were a lot of bad comments about him.

For example?

Because of his skin color, that he had no place here. In the meantime, he has not only shown through his performance that they were completely wrong. We need people like him. We used to be told not to talk about certain topics - money, love, sex, religion. Today, we've come a long way, and that's a good thing.

You are committed to the concerns of the LGBTQ community. Why is that?

People fight very hard in sport and do everything they can to win. But it should be fair. And that's what it's all about for me: fairness, fair treatment of all people, no matter who they love and who they are. Sometimes we take a step backwards in this development, such as with the election of Donald Trump as US president. Such decisions are usually made at the expense of people who do not fit into society's image. Drawing attention to this and giving these people a voice is extremely important.

You spoke earlier about your former home country of Germany: can you still be seen there at all?

Why is that?

Because you are campaigning for a speed limit on highways.

*smiles* In this discussion, freedom is often confused with habit. I live in Switzerland, where there is a speed limit. Does that make us less free here? Or do Germans immediately feel deprived of their freedom when they cross the border into Switzerland or France? But I am aware that driving without a speed limit is sacred for many Germans.

You have been able to let off steam on the racetrack all your life. What do you miss now that you can no longer do that?

I miss a lot, especially the competition. Or getting a result straight after a performance and knowing where you stand. The sport, the thrill. But I've also gained a lot and have more time for other topics and interests. I see it more as a trade-off than a loss.

[whimsymoonpages]

chapter 16. on a scale from 1 to disaster?

cw: anxiety, vulnerability, heartbreak, heavy emotions, drunkenness, self-doubt, supportive friendship, barty is the best person ever (but where is reggie why is he so absent...)

the room feels like it's spinning. maybe it's the alcohol, maybe it's the fact that everything feels like too much right now, but there you are, clinging to barty's shirt, sobbing into his arms like your life is over. in reality, it's just your feelings being absolutely wrecked by the fact that, apparently, james, sirius, and remus are in a beautiful bloody relationship.

"i'm so dumb," you sob, voice muffled by the fabric of barty's shirt. "i'm such an idiot! how could i have a crush on all of them at once? they don't even want me! i'm so stupid!"

barty pulls you back a little, his hands on your shoulders, looking down at you with a deadpan expression. "you dirty dog, all of them at once!" he jeers, not even hiding his grin.

"i'm knowww! i'm ugly!" you shout, cutting him off with more wailing. "and they're all gay, barty! and they have each other! why would they want me when i'm just... this?" you gesture wildly, like it's all so obvious to anyone with half a brain. even still, you look great. barty doesn't see a problem. "i have a missing part!"

barty stares at you for a moment, processing, and then raises an eyebrow. "a missing part? sweetheart, just because you don't have a willy doesn't mean they won't like you. plus, if they're all willing to date two people right now, who's to say they're not willing to date three?"

you sniff, wiping your nose dramatically on his sleeve, and then shake your head, even more distraught. "they don't want me. they're not like that, barty. they just think i'm—"

you cut yourself off with another wail. you shouldn't have drank as much as you did, but who was barty to deny you this? in a time of peril especially. you stare up at him through bleary eyes, his grin still present but a little softer now. "junior, they don't want me," you mutter. "they're happy. and i'm just..." you gesture to yourself again. "y.n fawley. the fool who moved in with them."

"well, maybe 'the fool who moved in with them' is exactly what they needed," barty says, shrugging. "but you won't know if you don't ask, will you?"

you open your mouth to argue, but then you deflate with a long, exaggerated sigh. "i'm a mess," you whisper, eyes welling up again. "i'm really, really, really a mess."

barty just pats your back, giving you a soft, almost pitying smile. "yeah, but you're my mess."

and for some reason, that makes you cry even harder.

after a moment, you catch your breath. your hair is sticking to your face, and the dried tears on your skin itch. you feel selfish. you feel bad. you have to deflect, you decide.

"how'd your date go, b?" you ask in a slur of words. you look up at him from your spot on the floor. he's still sort of holding you in the way he has so many times before. "i bet your love life is better than mine, ay?"

he inhales a breath. "come on the balcony with me? need a cigarette to talk about that bird."

you follow him out, stumbling over your own feet. the poor bloke lights his cigarette and takes a long drag.

"so, first of all," he continues, "the waiter—this bloke—comes over, and he's got this ridiculous mustache, like he stepped out of an old detective book. and i mean, this thing was way too much,"he says as he has bright green streaks in his hair, an eyebrow piercing, and shitty tattoos littering his skin. "i don't even know why he thought it was a good idea, but there he is, looking like he's ready to crack a case about missing dragons or something."

you try to stifle a laugh, but barty keeps going, completely unfazed by his own shame.

"so i start talking, y'know? cracking a couple jokes to break the ice. i go on about my dad's stupid obsession with collecting antique goblets, thinking she'll laugh, right? instead, she just kind of... stares at me. stares like i'm the one who's just told her i was planning on running for Minister for Magic or something. little does she know, that's all barty crouch senior."

you try to hold it together, but you can't help it. barty's ridiculousness is getting to you. you let out a cackle of a laugh and smack your hands over your mouth to conceal it. maybe if you were sober this wouldn't be so funny.

"so then we get to the main course," he grins, "and i, of course, order the most expensive thing on the menu. i have no idea what it even was, but it looked fancy. y/n, i shit you not it tasted like burnt toast with something weird and creamy on top. she asks me if i like it, and i'm trying to act all cool, so i'm like, 'yeah, it's sophisticated.' i'm choking on it, nearly dying, and she's just looking at me like i've lost it."

you're cracking up now. "i can't believe you said that," you snicker, and barty just shrugs like it's no big deal.

"i know, i'm an idiot. but that this rate, i know the date's gone in the bin, so i'm just having a bit of fun," he admits, rolling his eyes. "so, i end up spilling my drink all over her lap. the poor girl, right? she's sitting there, soaked, and i'm just...smooth with my charming self. i'm an absolute wreck."

you're struggling to catch your breath from laughing too hard. barty's face gets more amused by the second.

"to top it all off, i try to salvage the evening by inviting her for a walk. a walk, can you imagine? i get all deep and start talking about my 'grand ambitions' like i'm some dark and brooding wizard, and she's looking at me like i've lost my mind."

barty leans back, satisfied with the retelling. "she definitely didn't need to run anywhere—she left before i could even finish my drink. went from 'hey, i'm having a good time' to 'oh, i've got an early morning.'" he shrugs, almost impressed with how poorly it all went. "but truthfully, i've never been so glad to see someone leave."

you're still laughing, wiping away a tear. "barty, you're a disaster. your disaster might beat out my disaster."

he grins, and takes a long drag from his cigarette. he blows the smoke in your face and smirks when you scrunch up your nose. "i'm not sure about that, lovely. at least my date only involved two people."

"you always know how to make me feel better, b."

when you wake up the next morning, you groan as you realize you're still on barty's balcony. the cool air nips at your skin, but it's the headache that’s really making you wish you’d stayed asleep. your head feels like someone’s been using it as a drum, and your stomach is doing some weird dance of its own. you sit up slowly, trying not to disturb the peace of the balcony...mostly because you’re fairly sure you’ve made a fool of yourself. 

you glance to your side and see barty, still passed out in a lounge chair, one leg hanging off awkwardly, his shirt wrinkled, and his hair a complete disaster. 

you squint at the time on your watch, late morning, and you really should be getting home. but that’s not happening anytime soon, not with the state you're in. not with the way your heart is still a bit tangled up with your drunken confessions from last night.

you push yourself off the chair, groaning as your legs protest the sudden movement. you shuffle quietly to the edge of the balcony, looking down at the garden below, and the peacefulness of it all only makes your feelings feel heavier. stupid, you think, so stupid.

“you’re awake, too, huh?” barty’s voice interrupts your thoughts, and you freeze. you turn around slowly, expecting him to be smirking, or maybe rubbing his eyes and acting all smug. but no, he’s just sitting up, wiping his face like he’s equally as wrecked as you are.

“well, not exactly,” you mumble, rubbing your temples, still feeling the effects of last night’s emotional rollercoaster. “i was hoping i could sleep through this hangover.”

"you were hoping you'd sleep so you don't have to go back home," he reads you as he leans back, propping his feet up on the railing. "if you're gonna make a decision about those three, i'm glad you didn't make it while you were half-drunk and crying on a balcony. that's just bad form, mate."

he lights a cigarette and mutters, "breakfast!"

“thanks for the advice, barty, seriously. all you do is save my arse,” you sigh, the words feeling like a weight in your chest. "but seriously, i don’t even know if they care like that."

he blows out a cloud of smoke, watching it disperse in the morning air. "well, here's a thought: if they don’t care, that’s their loss. but if they do, you’ll be the one who gets to make the choice. not them. you."

you look at him, surprised by the blunt honesty. it’s not often barty says something that actually makes you feel a little less like you’ve made a huge mistake.

“you really think they’ll care?” you ask quietly, the doubt still lingering in your voice.

“you and i both know they'll care, lovely,” barty scolds you slightly, tapping the ash off his cigarette. “maybe they’re just waiting for you to say something. maybe they don’t know what they want yet. i mean, how the hell would they? it’s all a bit of a mess. three boys? specifically those three boys? salazar save us. ”

you exhale a laugh. you lean your elbows on the railing and stare up at the sky. “so, what? i just... do something? like, ask them?”

“yeah, why not?” barty shrugs, taking one last drag of his cigarette before tossing it to the ground. “worst case, you end up in another mess. best case, you figure out where you stand. at least you won’t be sitting here wondering, ‘what if? am i really ugly? or am i just a git?’”

now, a small smile tugs at your lips. “i might need another drink to process all this."

previous next

[syrma-sensei]

Somewhere In Your Heart, Ch.8: Broken Hearts.

Pairing: Soldier Boy x Fem!reader.

Rating: Explicit.

Setting: In the early 80s.

Warnings: angst, angst, angst...

Word Count: 2.6k

Summary: Soldier Boy lives through the ennui of his peak, but everything is about to change when he has a shift in his heart.

He's down ten points so far.

Ben glares at the assistant from Crisis Management who delivered him the news with indignant, green eyes. He snatches the newspaper from the poor guy's hands. His brow twitches in irritation as he reads this line.

America's golden son is a spoiled boy.

He scoffs at the title. But he gotta hand it to them, they're becoming more and more creative with the headlines. He snickers again. He won this country a goddamn war, and the first time people find out about his harmless recreational usage of coke, they immediately bite him in the ass.

Ungrateful fucks, he grunts. Should've let the Nazis kill them all.

He crumples up the page and tears it off with a sharp jerk of his hand.

“You talked to the house yet?” He grumbles. The fact is those shots of him sniffing powder shouldn't have been snapped in the first place. He fucking pays them to maintain some privacy for fuck’s sake.

“There’s been no answer yet, sir.” The assistant’s voice waver with caution. Well, he better be, because one wrong word and Soldier Boy would snap.

“Then get the fucking lawyers into this shit!” He growls, “Should I teach you your fucking job?!”

The assistant gulps, “R-Right away, sir.” He scurries away, back to his apartment. Fucking retard. That's what he gets when he relies on Vought to cover his ass; he gets fucked.

Nevertheless, it makes him wonder, who had the balls to do that?! To tarnish his reputation. He's aware that some people aren't so fond of him, but very few dared to speak out. Soldier Boy is the face of the US. Making him look bad is a direct attack on the fucking country.

He makes his way to Legend's office. He steps in without even bothering to knock.

“One day.” He enunciates, thinking one day is generous enough to have put a button on this shit, “If this ain't sorted out, I'll take matters into my fucking hand.”

Before Legend can utter a word, Ben leaves the room as quickly as he entered, heading back to his private quarters. Where he can be with one who can make him feel everything is okay.

“Hey, sweetheart…” He announces as he walks in. He finds you reading one of those fucking tabloids: Daily Supes. His eyes furrow.

You gaze up from the newspaper in your hands, “Ben, what's going on?” You say as you stand up, ambling towards him.

“I got fucking ambushed.”

You flinch a tad at the word. Does he know it was you? No, it's not possible, because if he did, you wouldn't have been here.

“Any idea on who it might be?” You ask gingerly.

“Not yet. But they're investigating it as we speak…” He sighs, “I gave them one day. If they don't bring me a name, I'll handle it myself. And tell ya one thing, it's gonna be ugly if I do.”

You gulp, tearing your gaze away from him, eyes are on the newspaper again.

“Hey,” He approaches you, taking the tabloid and tossing it aside. His hands cradle your face. “It’ll be alright, doll, I promise.” His voice is raspy, “It’s not the first time someone tries that kind of shit.”

You nod, putting on a small smile.

He smiles back, “Here it is,” He dips down and pecks your lips, “Oh, and for the record, Legend and I have been up to something for ya…”

“Something for me?”

“That's right.” He says, “You’re gonna sing another song, and with me.”

“Really?!” You gush, eyes sparkling.

“I’m not fucking with you, dollface, it'd be a shame not to let that pretty voice of your be of use.”

“When will that happen?”

“Once we sort this shit out.”

You feel a stab of guilt pierces through your chest. And now you know you truly fucked up. You fucking had the one-time chance and fucked it up. You could've bitten the bullet, found it in yourself to forgive Ben in time. And you would've lived a thousand times better life than anything you would imagine to come up with.

But you fucked it up.

You hold back the tears that start to burn your eyes, but they run down your cheeks anyway. Ben's brows furrow, “What’s wrong, baby?” He says in the gentlest voice ever.

You wipe your tears with the back of your hands, “I-It’s nothing…” You sniffle, “I just realised how lucky I am to have you… to be yours.”

Your stomach roils in convulsion at your sick lies. It's still a wonder to you that you're still capable of lying, and to the man you're falling in love with no less.

You're so fucked.

Ben kisses your tears away, then his mouth trails down to your lips. Soft and tender. And your tears pours down again. The question rises again… why does it have to be like this?

Ben wakes up from a nap after you two had… something akin to sweet sex. Could he call it lovemaking? Maybe. But one thing for sure, you looked and sounded beautiful when he fucked you. Your moans, your squirms, your tears of pleasure. All beautiful. Just like you. Sometimes he thinks it's the only thing he exceeds at. Making you feel good. Maybe he's finally good enough for someone, and he's glad that it's you. You deserve it.

He glances down at your, you're sleeping soundly, head resting on his chest. He smiles and kisses the top of your head before he expertly slither away from your hold.

Ben freshens up in the bathroom, then he makes himself a cigarette and smokes it in the living room of his chambers.

Then there's a knock on the door. “Soldier Boy… Mr. Edgar wants to see you.”

“Do you know what the fuck he wants?”

He shakes his head, “No, sir.”

Ben smacks his lips, waving his hand dismissively, “I’ll see him when I have time.”

“I’m afraid the matter is urgent sir. He persists to see you immediately.”

He grunts, puffing out a ring of smoke. “I’m here if he wants to have a little chit chat.”

“I’m afraid he wants to see you in his office, sir.”

Ben groans again and muffles the cigarette in the ashtray. “Fine,”

After five minutes, Ben is in Edgar's office.

“You wanted to see me, Stan?” Ben drawls as walks in.

The man smiles cordially at Ben, “Indeed, I did. Please have a seat.”

Ben sits in the chair across from Edgar's desk. He puts a leg over the other, and leans backwards into the backrest of the chair, putting his arms on the armrest. Ben might as well be swinging his dick, so that little shit knows his place.

Edgar's lips are still curling in that sickening smile, “I see you're so fond of Ms. (L/N)...”

“She’s a good girl who makes me cum without regret.” He asserts, he doesn't want to display any kind of affection he harbours for you to anyone, especially this man. Because he knows they'd use it against him in some way. And he won't have it.

Edgar chuckles, unfazed by Ben's crude words, “I must say, you make quite the couple.” Ben raises his brow.

But the amusement in Edgar's voice vanishes and it turns cold, “Your satisfaction with this company is a priority to us as long as it doesn't contradict with its best interests.”

Ben's eyebrows furrow, “Meaning?”

Edgar slides open a drawer to his desk and fetches a file and gives it to Ben.

“Meaning that any gimmickry against you is against us…”

Ben opens the file and his eyes widen as they land on pictures taken of you with some… gal.

“That young lady is Lana Miller, a journalist who works for Daily Supes, a vulgar tabloid. A resource claims she and Ms. (L/N) had an agreement. I’m afraid your girl has betrayed our trust.”

Ben doesn't heed Edgar's words as he remembers you reading the same exact tabloid this morning. You. The leak was you? Ben closes his eyes then opens them again, an attempt to digest it.

But why? Everything he ever did to you millions of women wouldn't have even dreamt of it. He took you in, salvaged you from that cunt, made you his. Loved you.

Edgar's rolling his lips talking, but Ben doesn't catch anything of what the formers said. “...I hope you understand.”

“What resource?” Ben asks calmly, yet his teeth grit.

Edgar clicks his tongue, “Theodore Adana.”

Ben snorts. That old fuck, the leader of The Church Of The Collective? Vought can't just believe anything comes out of that fraud’s mouth. For all he understands Edgar attended Theodore’s grandchild's baptism. They named him Alistair for Christ's sake. Why would he accuse you of such a thing in the first place? Could he possibly be one of your previous clients? No, Jack had no business in pulling in religious leaders.

Confusion gnaws on Ben's stomach when he looks down again at your pictures with the Lana chick, and he doesn't like it.

“No,” Ben answers.

“Pardon, Soldier Boy…”

“I’ll handle it.”

It came down to his hands after all.

“But…”

“I said I'll handle it!”

When you wake up, you don't find Ben next to you in bed. Instead, you wake up to your line ringing like crazy.

You pick up the handle of the telephone. “Hello—”

“Everything’s fucking crazy, (Y/N)!” You hear Lana’s voice shriek from the other end, you lift the phone away a bit. Then your eyes widen when you realise it.

“Are you nuts?! Calling me here!” You sit up, hushing your voice in fear of Ben being out in the living room.

“What does it matter?!” She shrieks again, “You have what you wanted, the bastard who killed your brother is busted in the balls. Anyway, we should meet…”

“Like hell we are…” You hiss, “You don't know what's happening here, they're looking for the culprit and if they knew I was the mole, I'd be dead.”

“That’s exactly why we should meet!” She inveigles, “We should hit them again before they know it. I made you a deal for an interview tomorrow night—”

You silence her, “You did what?!”

“Like I said we need to talk, but not with Vought being on our asses.”

You contemplate your options and finally give in. “Okay…”

“Here’s where we're gonna meet…”

You don't know how you managed to slip through the tower's heavy security, but you did anyway. Lana's spot is a park where you two can blend in without causing much attention.

She waves a hand at you and you sit next to her on a bench. You scan the park again. It's buzzing with life, kids shrinking and playing in the yard, families on picnic blankets. Your mind swaps you and Ben with one of those families, conjuring a picture of you two having a happy normal life.

You could've had it, but you fucked it up.

“You did so well, (Y/N)!” Lana says, roiling that image until it perishes in your head. The high pitch of her voice already starts to grate on your gears. “I mean having him snorting some nasty shit… you nailed it.”

You're not sure you should compliment yourself for that. Guilt stabs in your chest, and you fight it. He killed my brother. You reason with yourself. You can believe you're doing this. The man took your brother's life and you're agonizing over what you did to him. He had it coming. Another type of guilt pierces through your chest. You’re practically trying to convince yourself of something you are ready to turn a blind eye to. You can't believe it. Soldier Boy must've really done a number on you.

“Congratulations! You put your brother's soul to rest now.”

But did you put yours by doing that?

You gather your purse and stand up, “I don't want to have anything to do with this or you anymore.” Maybe it's too late, but you said it anyway.

The pompous glee in Lana's eyes vanishes as she looks up at you, “What do you mean? You still have to fight! Do you think Vought will just cut you loose when they find out it was you?”

“Are you threatening me, Ms. Miller?” You spit.

She bolts up on her feet, “No, but I'm not the one who's acting like a cum bucket to my brother's murderer.”

You slap her.

“You fucking slut!” She hisses at you, grabbing her reddened cheek. “I should've never put my hand in a whore’s like you.”

You chuckles bitterly at her low blow. “That’s right. Whores like me can't be trusted.” You shrug, “Now if I hear anything from you and I mean anything… I'll burn you and your stupid tabloid to fucking ground.”

“You’ll pay for this…”

“I’d like to see you try, bitch.”

Lana scurries away and you smile in triumph at her cowardly retreat. You expected more fight, but whatever. You turn on your heel, and your smile wavers as they fall upon none other than Ben himself. You startle on your spot.

Whores like me can't be trusted. Those words echo in Ben's mind as he stares at you. He dressed casually and followed you since you left the tower. He heard everything.

“Ben…” You say breathlessly.

“Was it you?” His voice is stringent, leaving no room for lying.

You look down then up at him again. You nod.

Bitterness mars Ben's face for a moment before it regains composure. He can't show vulnerability. Not to you, not to anyone.

“Do you care telling me fucking why?” His eyes swirl with the pain of betrayal, and it pours down on your back like an ice bucket.

Your breath goes choppy before you regain your aplomb again. Even though your eyes sting with tears, your voice doesn't break as you answer, “You killed my brother. Six years ago, you and your pals burnt down a building while chasing villains, you left many casualties behind, he was one of them. But you don't care, do you?” Your tears break their tension and spill in two rivulets rolling down your cheeks.

A heavy silence envelopes you two, only interrupted by the children's happy squeaks.

You search his face looking for anything akin to remorse, regret, that he's sorry, anything… but you find nothing but hard green eyes piercing through your soul.

“Did you get your revenge?” He asks, voice stoic, icy.

You take a step forward, “Ben it's—”

He raises his hand up, stopping you, “Answer the question.”

“You killed my brother, Ben… I wanted to hurt you, somehow.” You say through your tears, “You have my brother's blood on your hands…”

“He wasn't the first and won't be the last.” He asserts, “People die when they come in my way, (Y/N).”

A vein pulses in your temple, “Die… just die?!” You snap, “Those people have names, Ben! Have families, people who love them!” You grit your teeth, your tears aren't stopping, and your voice isn't helping you as it's cracking, “I hate you! I fucking hate you!”

You hate him for freeing you, for taking care of you, for making your heart beat, for making you question yourself, for killing your brother.

You fucking hate him.

“I don't want to have anything to do with you anymore.” You do him as you did that bitch. They came and here they go, in then out of your life, like most people do.

With that, Ben leaves you, and you collapse on the ground, you cry your heart out on the grass. Some people try to help you, but you push them away. You sit there all day long, until you return to your original home.

You return to Jack.

🦅 Previous chapter: The Scandal Date.

🦅 Next chapter: Never Say Goodbye.

🦅 Soldier Boy Masterlist.

🦅 Somewhere In Your Heart Masterlist.

Taglist: @thebiggerbear, @zepskies, @deanbrainrotwritings, @deansbbyx, @deans-spinster-witch

@venus-haze, @kaleldobrev, @k-slla, @ketchupjasmin, @demodemo909

@mystic-mara, @jqtaro, @pepsicolacoochie, @bitchykittenconnoisseur

@leavli, @robertthehoover, @soldiergrimes, @vanessa-boo, @uddiifiigj...

[cccakessslicemeee]

Spoilers!!!!!! For fantasy high !!!!!!!

Thinking about Riz and Kristen at the end of junior year past Kipperlily and the bullshit and everyone is chilling the fuck out.

Maybe they have a party. They call it a "party" but it's just a little get together and there's some alcohol sure but nothing too crazy. Riz is in his feelings and a lotta alcohol. He's drinking a lil stupid but hey he's earned it.

Kristen and Riz are on the roof looking at the stars. Kinda dumb considering Kristen's -4 dex but what's life without the risk? Anyway they are up there and it's kinda chilli. A soft breeze and Riz looks at Kristen but he can't ask the question.

She knows what he's looking for.

".....I can try-no I'd like to try. For you I'd try."

"It's been years..."

"yeah... I know it's been awhile. I can still try right? What's the worst that happens? Nothing happens"

"we don't have a body."

"it'll make things harder for sure....no bones? Nothing?"

"nothing....although....maybe we shouldn't? He's doing work up there. Or down there? Somewhere he's working on stuff."

"why not just ask him? You have that wrist thing right?"

"I don't have the coins for it."

"Fabian does. "

"...I don't want to bother him for stuff like that-"

"Hey can I be serious for a second? Like for five minutes I just wanna be real with you. If it wasn't for you I wouldn't have been class president. We wouldn't have had a chance against Kipperlilly and her bullshit if you weren't painting the prettiest of pictures about me and my campaign. By rights you should have been class president you're so much smarter than I'll ever be. You believed in me when the teacher didn't and you helped me study on top of attending so much shit. I feel like you've done way more for me than whatever stupid amount of coins it is. We'll get the coins. Promise. And I *want* to try. Okay? It's the least I can do."

They pass out on the roof.

Kristen does want to try and bring Pok back to life but she doesn't want to get Riz's hopes up so she doesn't tell him about it. She does have the other bad kids with her. Fabian for coins and Fig for moral support.

The first attempt fails. Of course it does. Fig says something about "oh it's like a knock at the door from an uninvited guest right? He don't know us." Which kinda makes sense.

Kristen introduces herself. All the bad kids do, to Pok's grave. Her grandmaster plan is to try and bring him back to life in time for graduation but that only leaves so much time. They spend so much time on this, tweaking little things and studying up on how to do a true resurrection. Good news, Pok hasn't been dead for 200+ plus years and there doesn't seem to be any force controlling or hell bent on keeping his soul so it should work. Cassandra and Ankarna are absolutely willing and able to lend a hand.

Riz is invested in his clue board because he's got another case, something less intense than murder but he's shuffling pictures and yarn around while he tries to figure out who has the better motive to steal the deed to some outdated historical building in Bastion city. The door to the apartment jiggles but Riz doesn't pay it any mind. It's Fig or Kristen or maybe mom came home early. Anyway he's just hyper focused on his board, eager to solve this low stakes case.

Pok comes into the apartment. It's different and yet so familiar. It's nicer now than he remembers it and there are so many more pictures on the walls. He says something to Riz who probably responds with something dismissive but not super rude. He's busy with his work. Pok comes close enough to see how his son goes about putting the pieces together. Focused and entirely calculating.

"I don't suppose you'd like a hand?"

"I think....that I've got....this one almost figured out. Petty theft. Family heirloom."

"Is that so?"

"Yes. The family is insufferable."

"Oh? That's a shame. It's safe to assume then they are a wealthy lot?"

"Loaded....the guy here sells engagement rings-well all sorts of rings but he's known for engagement and wedding rings."

They chat loosely back and forth but it's Pok just asking questions about his son's current project until Riz realizes who he's been talking to. It's a little silly to see how long it takes Riz to pull himself away from his clue board but when he dies there's a moment of solid, unbreakable silence as he realizes his father is right there. Completely corporal. They embrace and they both go to tears. He's fucking here! And he's home!

Kristen did it!

[moonmeg]

I'm sorry, but I'm too much into the Ian lore right now (probably like everyone else). How long did Ian exactly carry this pain alone before his siblings found out? How did they find out anyway? Was Ian in a bad relationship (once again) that was so suspicious to them that they just approached him? Or did he start to open up? If yes, who did he first open up to?

He refrained from addressing his issues to his siblings for 10 years (counting from his late teens, not his first time). He was scared they'd shut him out in disgust and shame. Moreover, his siblings had other worries than his love life. Blair and Neil had wives and children, Edan had his kid, Keith and Maisie their dating life - he couldn't burden them with his personal shit in good conscience. He was an adult and he should work his issues out on his own. When the suffering was too much to bear, he decided to change things but knew he couldn't do it on his own. He knew he needed help and if that help was just finally venting to someone about it and crying his heart out on someone's shoulder. So he gathered all his remaining courage and told them about his plight, gradually breaking into tears the more he talked.

"Sorry for bothering ye guys wi' this, I-I just... I dinna exactly have anyone else to talk to about this, and I'd simply ask the favor of ye to listen. Ye dinna have to reply to anything, ye dinna have to comment, I only want ye to listen. I think when I say my love life is a burning pile of shite it's to no one's surprise, but reality is... it's much worse. I laugh and joke about it, but if I'm honest, I am broken because of it. I am a shattered heart and soul and I don't, for the life of me, ken whit to do to piece it together again. I keep getting attached to people. That's probably just how I am... always the naive dumbass of the family. I meet them, I notice they're interested in me and then the first flirty sentences happen and just when I think there's nothing more to it and this person may genuinely like me... suddenly, their hands are in places they shouldna be, touching me, squeezing me, they are breathing down my neck and telling me things I've heard a hundred times before. And instead of fighting it, I give in. I keep giving in. I keep bringing those people to my house, I keep allowing them into my bed, I keep thinking maybe this time it'll be different and I keep waking up alone after every damn time it happens. I keep telling myself it's fine, I'll be alright but I am not! I am not fine! I am always just used. I am never anyone worth more than some one-mibay-two-night's pleasure. Mibay I dinna deserve love the way ye guys found it and in frustration I drown my pain in another person's bed. I'll spare the details but I am so tired of it. I want out of this cycle... I just dinna ken how. Ye guys can hate me or be repulsed or disgusted or whatever, I canna blame ye. I hate, am repulsed and disgusted by myself too and really, no matter whit ye think or say will hurt me much. I'm used to painful words."

He was met with silence and looks ranging from concern to pity and shock.

"Or ye can say nothing at all. Fine too."

Blair carefully uttered his name.

"How long for?"

Ian hesitated.

"Too long."

Neil leaned forward.

"Why didye never tell us?"

"Ye have other worries. Wives and bairns and other stuff."

"Ye're our brother! Ye're just as important!"

He didn't know what to say. He stared at the ground. He shouldn't have told them.

"Sorry." he whispered.

"No, we're sorry." Blair took her brother's hand. "We shoulda been more attentive and less teasing and taunting."

"It isna yer fault." he forced a smile.

"Ian." Edan glared. "Mibay not knowing just whit exactly was going on in yer life and protecting ye from it isna our fault but we made ye feel lonely and uncomfortable enough for ye to not approach us earlier. We're sorry."

Before he could say anything Keith chimed in.

"Ye say ye may not be deserving of love the way all of us do - I mean- majority of us do. Sorry, Ed."

"All good."

"But that's not true! Ye're just as much deserving of finding someone who loves ye for ye and puts in the effort to get to know the Ian behind the cocky, flirty act. Someone who just holds ye wi'out further intentions and not an ounce of selfishness to it. Ye're one of the kindest, caring people I ken and I am so happy to have ye as my brother. Even if just half-brother."

"Me too!" Maisie agreed, smiling. "Ye're deserving of a partner who loves ye wi' all their heart."

Blair wiped his tear.

"We're sorry we made ye feel unloved and that we let ye down. Keith and Maisie are right. Aye, sibling love is not the same but if ye look around the room, there's five people here who love ye and appreciate ye being part of their life. And outside there's... two, three, three, one... nine more people who do so!" she said.

"Eleven. Yer in-laws adore ye too." Neil corrected.

"Eleven!"

"Sixteen in total." Edan smiled.

"And more to come, probably." Maisie commented.

"We'll do better. We'll help ye, Ian. Promised."

He looked around his siblings smiling at him and nodding at Edan's promise. He sobbed as his feelings overwhelmed him.

****

"Hugs aren't a thing in the Boiling Isles!"

My honest reaction:

Bower siblings 1.0 group hug 🧡💛💙❤️🩵🩷 (important for my mental health)

[piftamere]

part five - stunned (wc : 0.5k words if you don't want to read there's a tl:dr just under it!)

As you stepped off stage, still feeling exhilarated from your first gig, you saw a freakishly tall man approach you, a smirk on his face.

When you recognized who he was, you inadvertently grimaced.

Come on, let’s be mature, i shouldn't base my opinion of him on hearsay. You thought, taking a deep breath and replacing your expression with a polite smile.

"Hey!" he greeted with a toothachingly sweet voice "I just wanted to come by and congratulate you, it was a really good performance, for a beginner artist like you." He was probably trying to flatter you, but instead sounded impossibly condescending.

Ok, so maybe the rumors were true.

"Thanks." Your voice and expression were deadpan. "Can I ask how you got backstage?"

"No, it's a secret," he winked at you, flashing a playful smile. However, when he noticed that you didn't even flinch at his joke, let alone laugh, he quickly added, "The security guard let me in because he's a big fan of me."

You wondered if he could sound even fuller of himself… and made a mental note to hire stricter security next time.

Deciding to be polite you replied "I have to admit you make good music, I've been a fan of Geto since forever."

He noticed the hint of admiration in your voice, making him relax a little.

"Not of me huh? I'm hurt." he pouted, taking the liberty of teasing you. "Geto was the one who invited me and i'm glad he did… I really liked 'before you can', i think that's my favorite from tonight."

Your eyes widened a little, "Really? I'm… surprised, it's a little sadder than the others. To be honest, it's my favorite one too."

"Surprised I'm more than a pretty face?" He teased again.

"I never said that." You rolled your eyes but the corners of your mouth tilted up slightly, he noticed that too.

“Can i ask what it’s about or if it’s about your own experience?”

Even if he could be genuinely interested, you can't help but decline. "Sorry, but it's a little too personal."

“Shame.” he paused and smiled “Can i get your phone number?”

You couldn’t suppress the frown on your face. He choked a little at your visible disgust and laughed awkwardly, passing a hand through his hair. “For business reasons, sorry I should have clarified.”

Only half convinced, you gave him your number, worst-case scenario you could simply block him.

After typing it in his phone, a hint of mischief in his eyes, he continued “You didn’t have to look so horrified that i might be hitting on you though, I’m deeply wounded.” his voice dramatic as ever, a hand on his heart.

“How will you ever recover?” you retorted, smiling. Without giving him a chance to respond, you said "It was… nice meeting you, but i gotta go. Bye!!"

And with that you disappeared behind a door, leaving Gojo Satoru stunned.

[tl:dr : gojo comes backstage, he’s arrogant (and a tiny bit charming), he congratulates you, asks for your number for “business reasons”, you give it to him and you leave quickly.]

fun facts

gojo really didn't notice he was condescending until shoko pointed it out

y/n doesn't know what to think of gojo yet...

author's note

ilovegojosatoru

i've eaten cereals in orange juice and it's not that bad tbh

⋆⭒˚｡⋆ tugging on heartstrings ⋆⭒˚｡⋆

as an aspiring solo artist, you dream of making it big in the music industry. With your talent and unwavering determination, you find yourself entangled in a web of romantic pursuits amidst rumors and betrayal. Will you emerge unscathed and manage to navigate your love life in the chaos of fame?

Part five - Next

rbs and interactions are highly appreciated <3

taglist : open :) to be added leave a comment on the masterlist of the smau

@lysaray @swissy23 @d6za1 @minzxec @sleepy-waffle @saturn-alone @dreamxiing @reiluvr @nikkimvriee @mellozhi @cre8ing @ichorstainedskin @inosfavgf

[mvskedxrtist]

Such a Bad Laozu

Wᴀʀɴɪɴɢ: PwP, Mommy Kink, Creampie, Slight Overstimulation, Choking, Slight Bondage

Nᴏᴛᴇ: I have lots of drafts saved up that I'm writing and waiting to post for you guys. I'm also adding one last fandom if you noticed my main masterlist. So, my planning, you'll see later but for now enjoy this small request

Lan!AFAB!Reader x Wei Wuxian - Such a Bad Laozu

Wei Wuxian... The Yilling Patriarch, the Yilling Laozu, demon spawn, Baba, Wei Ying, Ridiculous, many bad things.

Lan Y/N... The older Pearl of Gusu, Top three fighters, Mama, Ice Queen, the Gusu Princess, many good things.

Two completely opposite people, yet everyone saw them together most of the time during Gusu Lectures. No one knew of how Wei Wuxian was able to befriend the ice queen, not even her brothers knew... Well except Lan Xichen, but she made him promise that he didn't tell their little brother. And he's kept that promise, even to this day of how Wei Wuxian was in Mo Xuanyu's body. Lan Y/N could instantly tell it was her beloved. He wasn't able to fool her that easily.

So when Lan Wangji brought Wei Wuxian to Gusu those first few nights, you decided to have Wei Ying sleep in your palace because it made more sense then have him room with your brother. Mo Xuanyu was known for being gay so wouldn't him rooming with a woman be the best way so he's behaved? Everyone in Gusu thought so, especially Wei Wuxian.

"Wei Wuxian! The fact that you now come back here after all these years and yet decided to hide from me is shameful!" You yelled at him and pushed him onto your mat while the male looked flustered and chuckled softly. "Y/N..I know I shouldn't have."

"Oh that's definitely an understatement, Mr. Lazou. For leaving me alone these past 13 years, you will take all of my brunt." You smirked as you pulled his robes off. He looked a bit excited from your sudden change of attitude but he should of expected it. He left you alone for 13 years, he would definitely be pent up as well after finding out that his loved one was alive.

You used your Lan forehead ribbon and tied Wei Wuxian's hands up with it tight as you were on top of him. "Wow Mommy~... You better hope your brothers don't try to come in..." He teased you a bit while watching you take your robes off, getting back on top of him and wrapping your hand around his neck. "They won't. Xichen definitely won't and he'll make sure Wangji doesn't either. Now shut it."

The next few hours that went by were spent by you and Wei Wuxian fucking each other senseless like bunnies in heat, loud moans coming from the both of them. He couldn't really tell what time it was or how long they were going, he just knew that being with his pearl was amazing. "Fuck yes, Mommy~" He groaned while you were bouncing up and down his cock for probably the nth time. Squelching sounds could be heard from their hips connecting together, one look in your eyes told Wei Ying everything. He's gonna be exhausted when the sun rises.

And exhausted he was, he didn't even knew that Y/N had this much stamina until she made him cum inside of her ass for the fifth time. He could feel himself get sleepy, there probably only was a few hours left until it was time to get up yet you still wanted more from him. "Cmon, one last time, Wei Ying.." You panted softly while increasing your speed, moaning from how deep he went in you.

"B-but Mommy~ I don't think I can..~" He whined under his breath, tears in his eyes because of pleasure before you pulled his hair a bit, grabbing the ponytail. "But I know you can, baby~ Unless you're being a bad Laozu and refusing?.."

[aishangotome]

Jagasaki Yato: Chapter 2

Chapter 1

♡———♡

My own voice, so terribly suggestive that I wanted to cover my ears, fell into the space beyond the lewd sounds of wetness.

Yumeka: Ah... mmm––

Yato-san, with practiced hands, exposed my bare skin, finding and stimulating my sensitive areas.

Yato: You're very sensitive. You don't have to hold back your voice.

Yumeka: No... That kind of thing is embarrassing...

Yato: Do you have the leisure to think of anything else?

Yumeka: Mmm, ah...

The moment Yato-san's long fingers pressed against my soft core...

Yumeka: It... yaaa––

My mind went blank, and something burst inside me.

All strength drained from my body, and I simply leaned against Yato-san.

Yumeka: Ha... ha...

Yato-san looked down at me without changing his expression.

(I'm so hot, my head and body feel like they're boiling... but Yato-san... isn't even breathing heavily.)

The fact that I was being overwhelmed by pleasure, one-sidedly, stirred my shame even more.

Yato: Surely you don't think this is the end? There's plenty of time left until the incense burns out.

Yato-san didn't loosen his grip, but started stirring my depths more deeply and intensely---

Yumeka: Ah... mmm, ah!

Each time he exposed a weakness I didn't know I had, my thoughts melted and became hazy.

(No, what was I thinking until just now... I can't even remember...)

Yato: Don't let anything else distract you. Close your eyes and focus only on the pleasure.

Yumeka: Ah... again... ah, aaaah! I shouldn't, but...

Yato: Shouldn't? Why not? Indulge your desires to your heart's content.

Yato-san remained expressionless, but his caresses were never rough.

His fingers and tongue moved to trace my pleasure precisely, guiding me to climax, melting my reason into mush, my body begging for more.

Yumeka: Aah... no, it feels good... more...

At an orgasm I couldn't count anymore, my body shuddered, and I lost consciousness––

-

Yumeka: Mmm...

(Huh, I... ?)

Yato: You're awake?

(I... just blacked out like that... it's the first time I've lost consciousness in a dream.)

I sat up, my head still fuzzy, and glanced at my body––

Yumeka: ...!

I realized I was completely naked and hastily wrapped the sheets around myself.

Yato: You were only asleep for a few minutes. Is your body alright?

Yumeka: Y-yes.

Looking away from the awkwardness, my eyes fell on something sparkling like a gemstone near the pillow.

(Huh? I don't think that was there before...)

Yumeka: ...What's this?

Yato: It's called a 'Seiseki' (essence stone). It's the price you paid here.

Yumeka: Price... this is...?

(I don't remember paying... or do I?)

When I glanced at him for an answer, Yato-san opened his mouth without showing any annoyance.

Yato: Seiseki are the crystallized essence we receive from you butterflies. They're necessary to maintain this Mugenro.

Yumeka: I don't really understand, but... I'm glad I paid properly.

Yato: ...You say strange things.

Yumeka: Really? I'd feel bad if it seemed like I skipped out on the bill.

Yato: Skipped...?

Yumeka: ! Um, that was just an example. I didn't mean anything deep by it...!

Yato: ...Also, essence is the life source for the Tsukumogami, like the one over there.

As if responding to Yato-san, the snake I had met earlier, who had been in the room since who knows when, flicked its tongue.

Tokkuri Snake: Shaa!

Yato: This is my attendant Tsukumogami. ...It's time.

Yato-san said that we could only stay in Mugenro until the incense burned out.

I put on my clothes as told, and just as I stepped off the bed––

(Oh no, my legs are wobbly...)

My feet were unsteady because I still couldn't put strength into my body, and I stumbled badly.

Yumeka: O-oh!

Before I fell to the floor, Yato-san grabbed my arm and supported me.

Yumeka: S-sorry...

Yato: I don't intend to keep you any longer. I'll have the snake escort you back to Gasha.

The snake Tsukumogami, as if guiding me, raised its head and headed towards the door.

Just before leaving the room, I stopped and turned back to Yato-san.

(I should say something... but what should I say?)

Yato: ? What is it? Go already.

Yumeka: Um... well, thank you.

The first words that came to my mind were, for some reason, words of thanks.

Yato: .............

(Was it weird for me to thank him? Yato-san definitely seemed taken aback-)

Yato-san's mouth, which had rarely shown any expression, definitely turned up just a little.

-

--When I returned to the reception area, Gasha-kun greeted me with a bright smile.

Gashadokuro: Welcome back! How was it? Did you have a wonderful time?

Yumeka: Well...

(It's embarrassing to be asked so directly...)

As I hesitated, cheeks flushed, Gasha-kun seemed to take that as a confirmation.

Gashadokuro: I'm glad you seem to have enjoyed yourself!

(...! I... didn't exactly "enjoy" it, but...)

Since the content of "enjoyment" was what it was, I was troubled by how to react to his innocent smile.

Gashadokuro: Well then, if you leave this building and cross the bridge, you'll return to the visible world—reality.

Gashadokuro: Please be careful... and please come again!

Yumeka: Yeah, thank you for everything, Gasha-kun.

After leaving Mugenro, from about halfway across the bridge, the mist was getting thicker and thicker.

(I can't see ahead at all.)

Even so, my feet, strangely, knew the direction I should go, so I continued walking without hesitation—

-

"Beep beep beep!"

Yumeka: ...!?

Waking up to the sound of the alarm, I was on my bed in my familiar room.

Yumeka: Was that all... a dream...? Really...?

For a dream, it was too vivid, and the heat in my core remained.

(No, but there's no way that could have been reality...)

(Why did I have such a dream...? Am I frustrated?)

Feeling unbearable, I sat up, and the burnt-out incense stick at my bedside caught my eye.

(There are four incense sticks left...)

(Yato-san seemed to mention the incense stick last night—no, but that was a dream...)

I hurriedly pushed away the memory of Yato-san's wanton figure that had been revived in my mind.

(I'm done thinking about dreams! I have to switch gears and work to make my real-life dream come true.)

I stretched, and my body felt lighter than usual when I woke up.

(I'm not feeling any fatigue... and I'm really hungry. It's been a while since I've had an appetite in the morning.)

(It seems like I slept quite soundly...)

In a refreshing mood, I glanced at the clock by my bedside.

Yumeka: Whoa, it's this late!? I'll be late for work...!

I tumbled out of bed and rushed to the bathroom.

Yumeka: Haa, haa... I barely made it...

As I slipped into the office, panting,

Rai: Good morning. It's rare for you to come to work this early.

Yumeka: Rai-san! Good morning... Sorry, I'm just barely on time.

Rai: You're not actually late, so don't worry about it. Besides, you look much better today.

Rai-san is a reliable boss who is loved by everyone, always considerate to those around him.

Yumeka: Somehow, last night I slept so well I almost overslept...

Rai: Haha, that's good to hear. You always seem a little sleep-deprived.

Rai: Anyway, it's important not to push yourself too hard. If you have any problems, I want you to talk to me about anything, okay?

I returned Rai-san's gentle smile with my own.

Yumeka: Thank you. But I'm fine.

Yumeka: We'll have new people coming in soon, so I have to be strong.

Rai: Haha, you're reliable. I'm counting on you.

-

I finished work at the regular time and left the company, hurrying as usual to the café bar "Tapir," dyed in the sunset.

The sky was a little cloudy, and the weather forecast app notified me that it would rain soon.

(Oh no... If the weather's bad, customers might stay away.)

After opening the shop at 6:00 PM, and seeing off a few groups of customers––

(...Ah, it's raining after all.)

The sound of raindrops hitting the windowpanes made me stop wiping the whiskey bottles.

The jazz music, played at a subdued volume within the shop now devoid of customers, sounded louder than usual.

Yumeka: I guess it'll be a slow pace tonight. Even regulars don't come out much when it rains.

(But on the other hand, sometimes customers who happened to be passing by come in to take shelter from the rain,)

(And it creates a different atmosphere from a sunny day.)

Hoping for new encounters, but having finished cleaning and inventory checks, I finally had nothing to do...

I opened the door and went out to the street in front of the shop, and all I saw were sparse figures hurrying home in the fine rain that hung like a mist.

( ... I guess it's going to be a slow one.)

Just as I was about to go back inside the shop—

(Huh? Is someone there... )

I saw the tall figure of someone walking leisurely, shrouded in the veil of rain.

???: --...

The face illuminated by the lights outside the shop was—

(Yato-san...!?)

The rapture of last night, which should have been fading back into my memory as I returned to daily life, vividly resurfaced, and my skin tingled.

But I quickly shook my head slightly, bringing my thoughts back to reality.

(No, this isn't a dream. So that person is––)

In front of my eyes, the feet wearing well-maintained leather shoes stopped, having been unable to move from the spot.

(It's the usual quiet customer, whom I'd just let appear in my dream…)

Quiet Customer: Is the shop open?

Yumeka: Ah... yes, please come in.

Quiet Customer: ..........

Opening the door, he quietly stepped into the shop—

.

.

.

.

.

Chapter 3

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