#this feels a little nerve wracking to me honestly but i know i'll be more comfy

[solargrove]

hey friends :) not really sure how to go about a post like this because i've never done it before lol but i'm publicly deciding to change my name here from ren to raegan. i have been going by ren for as long as i've been on simblr but it has always been an alias and i never had a real reason to use an alias other than just feeling kind of anxious to share my name? but i'm at the point where i feel really disconnected from the name ren and i would much rather see my actual name being used so from now on please call me either raegan or rae!

thank you ❣️❣️

[nofomogirl]

Before the Beginning (part 1.5.)

Part 1.1. | Part 1.2. | Part 1.3. | Part 1.4. |

Part 2.1. | Part 2.2. | Part 2.3. | Part 2.4. |

In this post, I'm going to wrap part 1 up and I won't lie, I'm really nervous. I feel like I've made a tall and wobbly tower of blocks and now I need to make something coherent out of it. Make all this rambling have a point.

Plus, I'll need to talk about Final Fifteen, and that's inherently nerve-wracking.

You say I've already written about it? Whole 9 posts about Metatron's manipulation, picking it apart step by step? Yes, I did. But that's the point - it was about Metatron. I skipped the worst part - the last conversation between Aziraphale and Crowley.

I couldn't avoid it forever. Let's scratch and poke at that wound.

Fair warning though: there won't be any stark revelations. I'm just processing things by writing about them.

Let's start with some facts. These are all hard canon:

Crowley used to be an angel

Aziraphale used to know him back then

They both remember it, at least partly

The Fall transformed Crowley

And these are not canonical facts, but relatively safe guesses:

They don't talk about it

Crowley avoids thinking about it

Aziraphale has no clue how Crowley feels about it

Honestly, it appears that Crowley's pre-Fall identity is more of a taboo for him than the Fall itself. Sure, the Fall is still a sore topic, and he doesn't exactly discuss it, but he is talking about it, if only a little bit, and on some occasions he even brings it up himself. But when his angelic past is mentioned he just refuses to go there. He shuts it down on the spot with no regard for the circumstances.

This exact happened in Final Fifteen, except this time Aziraphale wasn't just pointing out Crowley used to be an angel, he also suggested Crowley may become an angel.

Just look at the dialogue, especially Crowley's responses.

M: (...) it might be considered irregular, but it would certainly be within your jurisdiction to restore your friend, Crowley, to full angelic status. C: He said what? A: He said I could appoint you to be an angel. You could come back to Heaven and... and everything. Like the old times. Only even nicer. C: Right. And you told him just where he could stick it, then? A: Not at all. C: Oh, we're better than that, you're better than that, angel! You don't need them. I certainly don't need them! Look, they asked me back to Hell, I said no. I'm not rejoining their team. Neither should you.

A lot of people pointed out how they were talking past each other the whole scene, not really hearing what the other was saying. I wholeheartedly agree and I think it started right here, with Crowley refusing to acknowledge and address what Aziraphale had said and ever so subtly - most likely unconsciously - steering the conversation away from the topic and into the miscommunication storm.

I mean, just look at what happened. In slow motion.

Metatron offered Aziraphale the job of the supreme archangel.

Aziraphale said No, I don't want to.

Metatron then altered the offer and said if Aziraphale took the job, he could turn Crowley back into an angel.

Problems start here.

S3 may change my mind but right now I am convinced Aziraphale doesn't really understand what the Fall was. He doesn't understand what it was objectively, and he doesn't understand what it means to Crowley personally. This is why Metatron's offer seems so attractive to him. He sees only pros and no cons. He cannot fathom what could be undesirable about it.

Metatron, on the other hand, knows much much more. That's why he feels safe making this seemingly generous offer - he knows it will cost him nothing because Crowley won't take it. Not only that, he knows the mere mention will trigger Crowley, and make him irrational. That in turn will upset and trigger Aziraphale thus making him more vulnerable and easier to manipulate.

Back to the scene.

Aziraphale goes to Crowley and reiterates Metatron's offer to him. He tells him that if he takes it, Crowley can be an angel again.

Now this is the important part. How does Crowley respond to it?

He immediately gets angry. Not amusingly annoyed or endearingly peeved, but properly angry.

And then he goes on a rant about why he and Aziraphale shouldn't rejoin their old sides. And that's... not entirely relevant.

For quite some time I couldn't figure out why Aziraphale's "Well, obviously you said no to Hell, you're the bad guys" didn't upset me as much as it logically should. Sure, I'm Aziraphale's defender and apologist but this line is objectively unfair to Crowley. I should be disappointed and frustrated. So why would I feel like I wanted to agree with it, even though my brain clearly didn't?

Then it finally clicked. It wasn't what Aziraphale said, especially not the "you're the bad guys" part. It was about his tone. I could relate viscerally to how ridiculous he found Crowley's argument to be. Because honestly Crowley, baby, what are you talking about? What do you think you're proving to your angel here? How is the offer you were made to go back to Hell even remotely comparable?

Sure, they appear to be almost the same on the surface. Beelzebub told Crowley he could go back to Hell, and become a Duke. Metatron told Aziraphale he could go back to Heaven and become a Supreme Archangel. But that similarity disappears if - unlike Crowley - you don't conveniently take bits and pieces out of context but look at the whole thing.

Beelzebub's offer was that if Crowley helped them find Gabriel he would be allowed to go back to Hell and become a Duke. Metatron's offer was that if Aziraphale returned to Heaven and became the Supreme Archangel, he would be able to make Crowley an angel.

Rejoining his old side (with a promotion) was meant to be a prize for Crowley, but a price for Aziraphale.

Both of our ineffable spouses love Earth and given the absolute freedom of choice, they would like to live there forever. Preferably undisturbed by any supernatural institution in any way. I don't think anybody doubts that. Leaving Earth and getting involved with their former sides - no matter the rank - was the exact opposite of that, the exact opposite of what either of them wanted.

Crowley was offered that undesirable thing as a reward, so obviously he said no.

Aziraphale was offered that undesirable thing as a part of a package deal which also contained something he perceived as highly desirable, so obviously he considered it.

But Crowley reacted as if Metatron's offer was the same as Beelzebub's offer. As if it was all about Aziraphale being invited back to Heaven. He focuses on trying to convince the angel not to go, on explaining how Heaven isn't good at all, and finally on confessing and offering to run away together. He tries everything except responding to the actual offer and simply saying he doesn't want to be an angel.

I believe the main reason was what I listed among the safe guesses - that it was too difficult to talk or even think about. So he focused on the other part instead. It came easily because (a) anything that wasn't thinking about himself as an angel was great at the moment, and (b) the idea of Aziraphale leaning toward Heaven yet again was something he had strong feelings and opinions about.

Sadly, Aziraphale helped him steer the conversation away from the point with his response. The infamous "you're the bad guys. But Heaven... Well, it's the side of Truth. Of Light. Of Good."

I believe that was a point of no return beyond which the whole situation couldn't be saved. Not right then and there. Not without both of them stepping away and calming down. But somebody made sure they wouldn't be able to do it...

And the worst part is, I don't think there was all that much faith behind Aziraphale's words. I firmly believe he honestly wasn't interested in taking Metatron's offer unless Crowley went with him. But as he got unbalanced he fell into old mental grooves.

If you don't mind, I'll stop here. I neither have it in me to break apart the entire conversation (perhaps I'll face this monster one day but no promises) nor is it necessary for this series of posts.

The point of which - in case you've forgotten, which I, admittedly, made very easy for you - is that (1) Crowley was substantially transformed by the Fall, (2) he does not identify with his past angelic persona and is pretty much unable to think about himself in those terms, (3) Aziraphale severely underestimates the depth of the transformation, (4) has very little knowledge and understanding about Crowley's feelings on the entire matter, and (5) it let him to making a lot of assumptions.

Another thing I am not going to discuss here is what Aziraphale thinks he's offering Crowley. Perhaps the subject will get its turn one day. For now, suffice it to say, that what Aziraphale is offering - or rather what Metatron has offered - is most definitely NOT what Aziraphale believes it to be.

In the opening post, I pointed out that angel!Crowley didn't have any visible serpentine traits (he had brown eyes with regular round irises and he didn't have his sigil/tattoo), and I proposed a theory that it's supposed to hint at a lack of serpentine nature. That Crowley wasn't originally a snake but became one during or after the Fall.

If we look at Aziraphale's offer through these lenses, Crowley's unyielding rejection of it takes on a whole different meaning. It isn't about principles anymore or about Crowley's feelings getting hurt or his worth possibly being questioned. It isn't symbolic. It's very real.

The offer to restore Crowley to full angelic status very likely means a repetition of the Fall - a painful transformation that mangles the spirit and alters parts of a person beyond repair.

The offer to make Crowley an angel may very well mean the eradication of snake!Crowley.

I don't believe Aziraphale understands it.

Crowley couldn't bear thinking about it so he never talked about it.

Thus concludes part 1.

I am very emotionally tired.

Thank you for reading.

[jamisonwritestf2trash]

may i request some sniperscout sillyness.

aka first date between them :3

Sniperscout First Date!

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Of course you can! SniperScout is one of my all-time favorite ships 😭 I love writing about them. So I'll break this down into two things because I've gotta add the silliness of Scout asking Sniper out.

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So, off the bat, neither of these guys knows how to ask someone on a date or how to date. Sniper tried sp hard to ask Scout out, working up the courage multiple times only to talk himself out of it at the last moment. Like Sniper sneaks up to Scout's door after successfully avoiding all the other mercs, with like flowers or something and knocks, all ready to confess, but then he hears Scout get up to open the door and he panics and leaves. Scout just opens the door and is so confused. He probably thinks the base is haunted. Scout is also way too nervous about asking Sniper out, but he's the one who ultimately makes the first move. Honestly, he'd end up doing the same thing as Sniper but gets caught.

Scout runs up to Snipers van. He's nervous as hell, hands shaking slightly, he knocks lightly on the door and the second he hears Sniper shuffling towards the door it all becomes to real and he freaks out, he starts to run away but Sniper has already opened the door, and is calling him back. Scout turns around, clasping his hands together in a nervous way, chuckling a little,

"Hey, Snipes! Uh, how ya doing?" Is the only thing he manages to say. He starts babbling about this and that trying to find an excuse for why he was there, his face is a little pink already. Sniper finally just bluntly asks him why he's there.

"Well, I- you see, I uh," Scout internally freaking out, he doesn't know why this has to be so hard, he's asked Miss Pauling out repeatedly and has been turned down every time, so why was that was less nerve-wracking than this? He finally just takes a deep breath, looks up for a minute, and spits it out before he has a chance to stop himself,

"Will you go on a date with me?" Sniper is turning a shade of red under his glasses as a moment of silence fills the air, Scout immediately takes this as a rejection and goes on damage control,

"Uh, SIKE! You shoulda seen the look on your face, haha, imagine us together that'd be so..."

"Yes." Scout immediately shut up,

"Wait, really? Uh, I mean, of course you'd say yes, who could resist this?" He says, gesturing to himself. Sniper just shook his head and told Scout to meet him at seven. They both acted cool when they walked away but immediately freaked out after they were a good distance away from each other.

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Surprisingly, Scout was more nervous asking Sniper out than he was actually taking him out on a date. They end up deciding to go to some shitty burger joint outside of town. Scout gets to the restaurant at 7... am. (kidding! But that's one of my favorite Scout quotes). They agreed to meet at Sniper's van. He's driving after all. Scout knocks on the door, Sniper answers, and he's actually sort of dressed up, well as dressed up as he can be, and Scout gets a dumb grin on his face, teasing him about it. Sniper just hits him on the head, muttering something about regretting this already. They get in the van and drive off. Scout spends most of the drive talking about random things to fill the dead air that would have otherwise laid around them, and Sniper just listens with a soft smile. Nothing has change between them, Sniper was afraid of that, he almost turned Scout down when he asked, scared of ruining their friendship, but he'd be lying if he said a large part of him didn't want their to be something more. They pull up to the burger joint and head in, and it goes much the same as it did in the van. Scout joking and talking Sniper's ear off, and Sniper is listening in, his feelings growing more and more as the minutes pass. Scout even managed to finally drag a couple of laughs, stories, and jokes out of Sniper. They spend the night just eating and enjoying each other's company. But in the end, as Sniper is driving back, he looks at Scout, who's tired but still smiling and talking softly, looking out the window. He wonders if this was any different than what they normally do. Sure, maybe during dinner, the conversations got a bit deeper than usual, but does that mean anything more that their friendship growing. Scout can pick up on the fact that Sniper is getting in his own head, and as slyly as he can, grabs a hold of his hand, sqeezing it gently. They pull up back to the base, both getting out of the van, Sniper asking Scout if he wants to stay and talk for a minute, maybe share a drink, Scout agrees and heads inside, they talk for more than a minute thought, more like an hour or two. Sniper eventually asks something about how their relationship is going to change or has changed, his worries from earlier slipping out, flowing freely due to the alcohol. Scout tries to think of a way to describe it, but he can't quite get the words, so he resorts to action. He grabs Sniper by the collar and kisses him. It's soft and gives off all the emotions Scout would have loved to vocalize. When he break the kiss he has a shit eating grin, and says,

"Now I can do that!" He feels proud of himself for all of two seconds, then realizing what he did, he turns a shade of red no human is able to replicate, he jumps up and starts speaking way to fast, walking to the door, laughing slightly,

"Ahaha, um, oh would you look at the time! I should actually be leaving. You know gotta rest up for tomorrow and all, bye Snipes!" He's walking down the stairs ready to make his run to the base only to be pulled back by Sniper, who Scout didn't realize had recovered from the kiss a lot faster than he had anticipated.

"Oh no, you don't get to just run away after that." Sniper teases. Scout only lets out a nervous chuckle and starts trying to mix an appology and explanation together,

"Oh, well actually, um, see, I only did that because-" Sniper just shuts him up with a kiss of his own. Once it ends, both of them are blushing, and both of them know exactly what's changed. Sniper asks if Scout wants to stay the night, and Scout agrees. The get in the bed together and lay in the quiet darkness for a moment, before Scout asks,

"You know what else I can do now?"

"What?"

"Tell you that I love you." Sniper just laughs a little at the cheesiness and just says,

"I love you too."

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Oops, this became way too sweet! Also, sorry, not much sillyness about the date itself, I think these goobers save all their sillyiness as pre - and post stress before events. I'm giggling rn. I love these two. Anyways, one ask down, 20 to go 💪💪 thank you guys for being patient with me :,)

Also, I always finish these fics right before I go to bed, so I'm always paranoid they make no sense, but it's fun.

[angelsanarchy]

One Long Weekend: - Clyde/YN One-Shot Series CH 16

"If I asked you to stay, would you?" "There's only one way to find out."

Tagging: @roryculkinluvr @siriuslymooned @cc-luvr @crypticsewerslut @icarus-star @desert-springtime @shady-the-simp @izuoyarmin @mayathepsychic1999

TW: fucking, eating out, fingering, p n v, premature ejaculation, cock warming

MONDAY, 8:00PM

Clyde had no idea what to expect when walking up the stairs to Y/n's apartment. He still couldn't believe she had come to find him and wanted to bring him home. He had honestly never gone home with anyone before and up until this moment, he hadn't realized how nerve-wracking it would be.

"It's not as fancy as your place but its got its charm." Y/n opened the door inviting Clyde in. It was a lot more put together than his place but he liked that there were pictures on the wall of Y/n for him to get to know her a little better. He chuckled at one specific photo of her in a Scooby Doo costume, missing at least two front teeth.

"That's my dad's favorite picture. He got me addicted to Scooby Doo. As a kid who hated going to school, cartoons were kind of a big deal." Y/n explained dropping her keys on the counter.

"I think my mom was concerned I was going to turn out to be a serial killer with all the scary costumes I came up with. My dad drew the line at a homemade Leatherface costume one year and I just sort of gave up the ghost." Clyde offered. Y/n noticed how he swayed on his feet recognizing it wasn't because he had been drinking but that he was nervous.

"Did you want a drink or something to eat? I could make something." Y/n asked but Clyde shook his head.

"Nah I probably shouldn't drink anymore tonight. I think my sorrows are all full up anyway." Clyde joked. Y/n sat down on the couch and invited him to join her. He sat down carefully and let out a breath.

"I'm so sorry I made you think-" Clyde quickly shook his head cutting her off.

"I don't want you to feel bad about having a life. We spent a long weekend together and things happen. Clearly I overreacted because...well I don't usually do this." Clyde had shifted his body to face Y/n and put his hands out for her.

"This?" Y/n pressed and Clyde looked down at their fingers intertwined.

"I don't usually get the girl I really want. All of it just seemed like a dream and then when you left, I felt like I had woken up and it sucked." Clyde still couldn't bring himself to look her in the eye. In truth, he felt terrified this was all going to blow up in his face.

"I don't know if you've noticed but I get in my head a lot. I blame the ADHD." Clyde joked as Y/n brought their hands up in front of them making him look her in the face.

"I'm not a dream Clyde. I'm here with you in my apartment and there's nowhere I'd rather be." Y/n smiled sweetly. Clyde let out a shaky breath and nodded at the reassurance. Y/n pulled their hands towards her chest, sitting up on her knees to lean into Clyde to kiss him softly. She could feel him shaking as she pulled away and could see his eyes slowly opening to stare into hers.

"If I asked you to stay, would you?" Y/n spoke tenderly seeing how emotional Clyde was in this moment.

"There's only one way to find out." Clyde watched her smile slowly, moving to sit in his lap, legs locking behind his back.

"Will you stay with me Clyde?" Y/n held either side of his face, pushing his hair out of his eyes so she could see just how blue they were.

"I'll stay as long as you want me to." Clyde's response was so genuine Y/n couldn't help herself. She pulled him into another kiss but this time there was nothing gentle or sweet about it. She snaked her tongue into his mouth immediately being met with his own. His arms wrapping around her back to pull her even closer than she already was. Clyde's lips tried to keep up with Y/n's, pulling her legs so he could lay her down on the couch. Clyde's lips move down her neck, sucking and biting the sensitive skin pulling a moan from her mouth as she craned her neck backwards to allow him more access to the skin of her neck and chest.

Clyde wanted to taste every piece of skin on her body. He wanted to leave little marks so that tomorrow morning she would run her fingers across them and remember that his lips did that to her. He felt himself get even harder than he already was when she ran her hand up the back of his head, through his hair so she could pull a fist full of it.

"Fuck." He groaned resting his forehead against her collarbone for just a moment.

"A-are you okay? Is this okay?" Y/n checked in making Clyde chuckle.

"This is incredible. Are you okay?" Clyde lifted his head trying to look at her through his hair. She pushed it off his face so he could see her smiling face.

"I'm pretty fantastic but I think for the things I want to do with you, we should probably go to my room." Y/n gestured over Clyde's shoulder and he carefully removed himself from atop her and extended his hand. She took his hand and pulled him towards her bedroom, kicking the door shut behind them.

Clyde pushed her back against the door picking up where they had left off, letting his hands grip her ass. Y/n's hands pushed against Clyde's chest causing him to stumble back. Y/n started to undo the buttons on the front of her blouse slowly, watching his gaze be drawn away from her face to her now exposed blue bra.

"Okay, your turn." Y/n pushed and Clyde pulled the bottom of his shirt up and over his head, tossing it in the corner and shaking his hair out. Y/n was pleasantly surprised by the definition Clyde had from his shoulders to his hips. He wore such loose baggy clothes, you could never have guessed he would be so fit beneath it. He wore at least 4 bracelets on his wrists and they now stood out next to his pale skin.

Y/n unclipped her bra, letting her tits bounce free. She watched the slight drop in Clyde's jaw as he gazed at them longingly. His hard on was obvious as it tented his shorts tightly. He knew slow and steady teasing wasn't going to work here. He wanted her as much as she wanted him and he couldn't wait.

"Fuck it." Clyde practically sprinted across the room slamming into Y/n roughly, connecting their lips again. He walked her backwards and laid her down on the bed so that he could take in how beautiful she was half naked on her bed, waiting to fuck him. It took everything in him not to cum in his pants just from the sight.

He let his body fall carefully on top of hers, moving his lips quickly to her nipples so he could flick his tongue against them, grip the neglected one in his hand and leave a trail of spit between them as he suckled at her tits.

"Oh...fuck." Y/n moaned pushing her hips up and catching him off guard. He moaned loudly making him stop. Y/n stared up at him and he was squeezing his eyes shut tight.

"So...I didn't think I would see you today so I'm not wearing any underwear." Clyde confessed with a chuckle.

"Does that mean I can't touch you?" Y/n asked snorting a laugh.

"No no you can absolutely touch me, I'm just letting you know that I'm at like a 70% on blowing my load already so if you could just give me a minute..." Clyde sat back for a second and watched Y/n unbuttoned her shorts, sliding them down with her panties being careful not to touch Clyde in the process.

"You just let me know when I can touch you without it being a problem." Y/n ran her fingertips along her cunt, biting her lip as Clyde practically drooled just seeing how slick she was.

He didn't waste anymore time trying to stay strong. He dropped to his knees next to the bed, letting his face fall between her thighs, lapping at the juices waiting to be suckled. Y/n sucked in a breath from the contact and Clyde was determined to make her cum in case he ended up cumming embarrassingly fast.

Clyde's tongue circled her clit, sucking on it tightly and using two fingers to collect her wetness. Any time his fingers touch a specific spot, her knees would shake like they were threatening to trap his head in her pussy.

"Oh god Clyde." Clyde continued tongue fucking her pussy, looking up through his lashes to watch her grip her tits tightly in her hands, writhing at his touch. Clyde had a secret passion for eating pussy. He hadn't be able to eat a ton of girls out but it was one of the bookmarked porn searches he constantly made sure to use during the week. All he wanted to do was make Y/n cum so he could taste her.

"I-If you don't stop, I'm going to c-cum." Y/n said it like a threat but she could feel Clyde's smile against her cunt. Y/n's hands reached for the top of his head, grinding against his face while moaning loudly. Clyde could feel her cumming, quaking around his fingers and releasing her juices until they were running down his chin. She rode his face and fingers until she snapped her legs like a Venus fly trap around his head begging for him to stop. He let his palm run up her stomach to crawl back to her lips and she had tears on her face.

"Are you okay? Did I hurt you?" Clyde was worried for a second until she yanked him by the back of his neck to kiss her. Clyde felt chills when their skin connected. Y/n's breathing was erratic as she used her feet to try and shove his shorts from his body.

"I'm-I'm not going to last long..." Clyde pleaded but she didn't care. All she wanted was to feel his cock inside of her. She gripped his now exposed cock feeling how slick with precum it was before lining it up to her hole.

"F-fuck." Clyde squeezed his eyes shut at the feeling of her handling his cock and the tight, wetness he was met with once she pulled him in. They simultaneously moaned loudly. His thrusts were staggered and sloppy at best, Y/n clawing at the skin of his ass for him to be deeper inside of her.

"Fuck Clyde. I want you to cum inside me. I want to feel you." Y/n begged. Clyde pumped his hips almost violently to give her what she wanted, what they both wanted. Clyde fucked through his orgasm, feeling almost as though he hadn't cum in forever as he shot ropes of cum into Y/n. She swiveled her hips with a groan feeling the heat painting the insides of her cunt and feeling at peace. Clyde's arms started to buckle and he flopped onto her breast, covered in sweat and shaking. Y/n ran her hands through his sweaty hair, cooing at him so he could catch his breath. She let him stay flaccid inside of her, feeling his cum running down her ass onto her sheets. The both of them laid completely spent, trying to breath and be as still as possible.

[unclewaynemunson]

(The final part to what I’m now calling the Roses and Sunshine AU) | AO3 link

The next Wednesday, when it would be just the two of them again, Eddie knew what he was going to do. He was finally certain about what he wanted, but that didn't make it any less nerve-wracking, and he spent the whole day biting his nails and being constantly distracted as he went through his lessons with Will, Jane and a couple of other kids.

When his last student of the evening finally came in, Eddie was met with a smile as bright as the sun.

'Rose is completely obsessed with your present,' Steve told him. 'It's driving me crazy, that thing is the worst. One more time of hearing that tinned version of Old Macdonald again and I might throw it through the window.'

Eddie snickered. 'I'm sorry, I'll take full responsibility for it,' he said, raising his arms in a surrendering gesture.

He had planned on waiting until the end of the lesson before saying what he wanted to say, but he had never been a patient person – and how could he wait any longer when Steve was looking so beautifully happy and the opportunity was right there?

'Can I perhaps make it up to you by taking you out sometime?' he asked, trying to sound confident, but not entirely sure about how he delivered on that one. His heart was beating so loudly that he thought Steve could probably hear it from where he was sitting.

'Taking me out?' Steve repeated. It sounded incredulous, like he was afraid that he had misheard Eddie.

'Yeah,' Eddie said, softly.

He had been quite convinced that Steve was into him, too, but upon seeing the guarded look that appeared in his eyes, he suddenly wondered if he had made a huge mistake.

'Like a date?'

He nodded, feeling too nauseous to even say anything anymore.

'Um...' Steve rubbed a hand over his face. Seconds of silence stretched out between them and Eddie desperately wished that Steve would just put him out of his misery right away, as he waited and waited and waited for the guy to finally give him his answer.

'Look, Eddie...'

Eddie recognized that tone – he was about to be rejected. Fuck.

'I really like you. Honestly. But... I don't really... I don't really date around anymore,' he stammered. 'Not since Rose, I mean.'

Eddie looked at Steve, taking his own seconds before responding to that, his heart still thumping annoyingly loud in his chest. I don't really date around anymore. There was something about the way that was phrased, something that gave Eddie just enough hope to not give up entirely just yet.

So he nodded. 'Yeah, I get that,' he said. 'But I didn't really mean it in the “let's date around for a little bit” kinda way.' A nervous chuckle escaped from his throat. 'I'm kinda far gone for you already, Steve. So...' He shrugged sheepishly. It was a goddamn scary thing to admit, to be so straightforward about what he was feeling, when he had no idea if Steve was feeling the same way about him.

Steve cleared his throat, combed a hand through his hair. 'Eddie...' It was almost a sigh, the way he said his name. 'I don't think you really understand what I'm saying here. Rose and me – we're a package deal, basically. And I know that that's a lot. It's not something I'd ever wanna ask of someone.' He averted his gaze to the wall behind Eddie's head. 'Not even of someone I'm, like, totally in love with,' he mumbled under his breath, almost as if he didn't want Eddie to hear it.

But Eddie did hear it. And finally, he understood. He had been right, Steve was into him – but he assumed that his sister would be a burden to Eddie.

'Stevie,' Eddie said, softly. He reached out his hand; Steve didn't pull back as he intertwined their fingers with each other.

'I think Rose is amazing. And I'd love to get to know her better. You don't have to worry about that. If I'm gonna be a part of your life, I know I'm gonna be a part of hers, too. And I'd be fine with that. More than fine, actually, to be honest.'

Steve's eyes widened. 'Are you sure?' he asked in a slightly creaky voice.

Eddie nodded. 'Yeah. Hundred percent.' He watched Steve's shoulders relax and heard him release his breath.

'Actually, I desperately wanted to become her uncle-slash-brother-slash-stepdad ever since I saw her. I'm not actually interested in dating you at all, it's just my strategy to get closer to Rose.'

Steve laughed; it was a loud laugh emerging from the depth of his tummy, making his whole body shake and his face light up in a completely enchanting way.

'Alright, I can live with that,' he breathed out. 'It's a date, then.'

'It's a date,' Eddie agreed, letting out a shaky laugh while he squeezed Steve's hand. He had to say it out loud, to make sure that it was real, that he was planning a date with the single most wonderful person he'd ever met. 'Fuck yeah.'

Steve stretched out his hand – the one that Eddie wasn't holding – to carefully brush through Eddie's curls. 'You do know that you're not allowed to say “fuck” when Rose is around, do ya?' he said with a wide smile on his face.

'Can't make any promises 'bout that,' Eddie teased back.

'Can I...' He let his gaze wander downwards to Steve's lips. 'Can I do something else I'm not allowed to do when Rose is around either, now? Or is that only allowed after the first date?'

Steve parted his lips slightly, shuffling a few inches closer to Eddie.

'You can definitely do that now,' he whispered against Eddie's skin, letting Eddie meet him in the middle.

Taglist: @kardinalkalamity @imzadidragonfly @simpforsauron @undreamingscatworld @nailbatbabygirl @solosnail @theysherobinbuckley  @sharpbutsoft @manda-panda-monium @piningapple @whimsicalwitchm  @withacapitalp @kerlypride @bejeweledbaby @imhereforthelolzdontyellatme @cheeseaddict-12 @henderdads @hammity-hammer @nelotegreitic   @silentiumdelirium @mad-h-w @evix-syne666  @legitcookie @csinnamon-fox @deleataecount @sadcanadianwinter  @shadowofaliar @and-say @connected-dots @thosemessyvibes @panicatthediaz @basilthefourth @swimmingbirdrunningrock @inikokoru @adaed5 @ali-just-ali @spectrum-spectre @paperbackribs @steddiewritingnerd @homosexual-having-tea @infinitetrashbag @zerokrox-blog @cr0w-culture @thing-a-ling @skybridgerton @by1er-endgame  @martzja @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @fandomcartographer @maya-custodios-dionach (Jesus H Christ I can’t believe there’s so many of you, honestly can’t express how much that means to me. Every mention I received over the past few days about all your lovely replies and tags has made me so, so happy!)

[twisted-wonderland-shenanigans]

So...

Do you guys know that thing about creative writers with ideas (plot bunnies) and how they always seem to multiply one after the other? That's me with Twisted Wonderland AUs. I can't help it! The series just reminds me of all the stories I loved as a kid, with characters that had depth and / or developed or we got to learn more about--even if it was stupid little things they do in their everyday life! I've grown to appreciate it in ways I never imagined I could any form of media. ;;v;;

To be honest...this game has given me the creativity to consistently create and build upon ideas, and the support you all have given me has meant so much. I can't thank you all enough for sticking with me for so long, and for sending me all the ideas or scenarios you all have been daydreaming of. ;;v;;

So I wanted to give a bit of an update on a few things I'm going to do with the blog:

1) Create a rules page. I've gone far too long without updating my original set, and I feel it's long overdue 😂 Plus, it'll help me keep track of certain things!

2) Go back through and update the links on the Masterlists with posts I may have missed. I didn't realize that some things I was referencing in some of my latest posts (aka the grape incident in the monster!AU) were missing, so I'm gonna comb through my posts and make sure I label and organize them easier for you guys to find (and for me to refresh myself on what I write)!

3) Answering asks (of course). Things are a little slow going and my muse has been getting finicky with me, but I will make sure I get to everyone's asks! Some I may answer because they're quick and easy, others...I may end up getting an idea for something more expansive, so that'll take a bit longer. 😅

And finally, 4) Introducing a(nother) AU:

Twisted Wonderland!Mermaid AU!!!

Honestly, this started because I got inspired by the artwork by this artist here where they drew the characters based on Floyd's nicknames for them, and it started as a Marine Biologist AU where Yuu is a marine biologist and taking care of the mermaid bois (all 22 boys + one fire-breathing cat) buuuuuut...at the moment, Yuu getting shipwrecked and living on the island with the mermaid boys wouldn't leave me alone. 😂

As well as an idea where Yuu is a full-blooded Kaiju/born a Kaiju and has Land Before Time like adventures because I got emotional at baby Littlefoot hatching, but who's counting the ideas? Certainly not me!

Anyway, I wanted to share a snippet of the prologue I have written that's currently under construction, so the final product may differ. I'm honestly really excited about this AU too, and I hope you all enjoy it as much as I do~ ;;v;;

Snippet under a read-more because this post is going to be long anyway 😂 Enjoy!

Oh, and if I need to tag it a certain way for future posts, please let me know and I'll be sure to add them!

//////------------//////

If anyone were to ask Yuu what they were going to be doing over the summer, they likely would have told them: catch up on their reading, or playing video games, or any number of different things they had planned. Even just relaxing at home or on the beach would have been an enticing offer.

A scuba diving trip was not something they expected to get dragged into.

“First time diving?”

“Was it that obvious?” Yuu asked, one hand gripping the bar on the seat next to them until their knuckles were white while the other kept hold of the oxygen tank sitting in front of their flippered feet.

“Yeah…kinda obvious for a first timer,” the instructor said with a chuckle, the man giving them a reassuring pat. “It can be a bit nerve-wracking for new divers, but you’ll be fine. You��re one of the contest winners, right?”

“I put my name in as a joke, I didn’t think I’d actually win!” Peering over the edge of the railings, Yuu couldn’t make out anything in the dark water. “I…thought we were going to dive near the shallows closer to land. What are we doing so far out?” they asked, swearing they saw a big shadow pass by…only to realize it was the ship’s frame reflecting on the water.

“I know we’re a lot further out than we normally would for first time divers, but we had problems with our normal ship and the only one that was available was this ship a couple of marine biologists were using.”

“…why didn’t you just cancel and set it for another day?”

“Try telling that to my bosses,” the man muttered under his breath before the smile was back on his face. “Anyway, I think this will be a fun change to the program! These biologists are actually working to explore the reactions of marine life to musical instruments, and we’ll get to see it firsthand ourselves!”

Before Yuu could respond, the ship came to a stop and the driver said, “We’re here! You folks ready to go diving while we get set up? There’s a coral reef not far below us, so you’ll have plenty of time to sightsee.”

“Yup! Okay, so let’s go over the basics again, and I’ll make sure your gear is on properly.”

Yuu listened nervously as the instructor walked through each procedure and rule of diving, the wetsuit sticking tightly to their body as the tank weighed heavily on their back. This was not how they imagined their first time scuba diving would be—they could barely even make out the shore from a wave in the distance. Finally—with mask secured and breathing apparatus in—the instructor gave them a reassuring nod…before falling backwards into the water with a  ‘sploosh!’. For a brief moment they froze, but the motion of the ship and the weight on their back knocked them off balance and forced them backwards.

Fwoosh!!

[aylacavebear]

Stockroom Antics - Chapter 19

Maria had changed jobs numerous times over the last five years, more to keep herself safe than anything else. Her mother had told her she was a fairy but she thought it was just her mom being weird. Honestly, though, she had no other way of explaining what had happened to her that stormy day before she'd gone into a coma for two weeks.

Please don't take my work. I'll post warnings for each chapter. Will probably be 18+ I haven't decided yet!

Word Count: 2524

Pairing eventually Dean Winchester x OC

Warnings: Angst

A/N: This one's written a little differently than my last one. Let me know what you think. It's the first time I've tried this type of writing. Chapters will alternate viewpoints as well. I also looked into an actual area so this one could feel more realistic. This one is taking on a life of it's own in a turn I hadn't anticipated, so adding a new tag.

----------------------------------------- Stockroom Antics Chapter 19

When the dragon crawled into your lap, it helped you relax a little. Plus, it felt nice to see it come over to you instead of interacting with Dean.

You still weren’t sure why it bothered you as much as it did. This whole “getting to know each other” thing made you nervous. Yeah, you enjoyed being around people, making them smile and laugh, but somehow, this felt different. So, you were nervous. Pinpointing why you were nervous was still something you couldn’t quite figure out.

The idea of adding to their grocery list felt strange. You even debated helping to pay for some of the groceries, but for now, keep that to yourself. When Sam mentioned you just going with them to the store, the idea was appealing. Then you thought about the dragon and how that would work. Would it stay at the bunker? It wasn’t like you could take a dragon out in public, no matter how small it was. People would freak out.

It was fairly embarrassing to tell them personal things about you, like reading fanfics on Tumblr. The thought of the things you enjoyed reading on there made you blush slightly, and you just hoped neither of them noticed. Thankfully, though, at least Dean had focused on baking. Although you couldn’t list specific things, so you generalized. 

Why did he have to look so damned adorable when he smiled the way he did, you thought to yourself. And the way he chuckled made you want to smile. Then, every time he’d called you sweetheart, it made your heart flutter a little. You pushed it away, though, as best as you could. No point in getting attracted to him, even if you would be staying with them while they figured this whole thing out. You’d already convinced yourself that you were weird, especially after your accident and these two hunted monsters.

Finding out that Dean loved pie like he did gave you an idea. There weren’t many ways you could contribute or show your gratitude for what they were doing for you, so you decided to bake for them. It was simple enough, and it was something you loved doing. Now, with your powers increasing, it might even be easier.

Finally finding a little courage, you asked about the sigils. You understood Sam's reasoning; it made tons of sense. But what Dean said made you smile a little; you just couldn’t help it. Plus, he looked really, really good with how he leaned back in his chair. Again, you shook the image from your mind, trying to focus back on the conversation.

Watching the interactions between the brothers was adorable. The little things where they were different and how they would get playfully frustrated with each other made you giggle or laugh internally, though. Their laughter was pleasant. Laughter was something you’d been missing over the last few days. Sharing why you were nervous was more nerve-wracking than anything.

It wasn’t until Dean said you were their kind of weird that you finally began to truly relax and genuinely smile, even if it was small. The two full beers and now your third were also helping you relax more. The dragon stayed asleep in your lap the entire time; its presence alone helped you relax further.

A half-hour later, Sam was picking on his brother about books, “You’d rather watch something than read, and you miss all the little details. The books are far better,” Sam insisted.

Dean leaned forward in his chair, “I don’t need all those things. The show is fine, and I get the important stuff,” he argued.

“It depends on the book and the show. What one are you two arguing over?” you asked curiously. This was clearly something they’d argued over before.

“Game of Thrones. The books are far better,” Sam insisted.

“I’d still rather have the visuals,” Dean chuckled.

You did your best not to laugh at both of them, “I can understand both sides. Although, having read the books and watched the show, you do understand more than if you only do one or the other,” you told them, giggling a little before taking a sip of your beer.

“That’s a lot of books, Sweetheart. I’ll stick to the show,” Dean replied, and his playful smirk made you smile again.

“See, that’s what I mean. You just dismiss reading, so you’re missing out,” Sam argued, and you could tell it was playful.

“I’ll read all day, for a case, but if I can watch something, I’d rather do that,” Dean stated, attempting to end the conversation on the matter.

You couldn’t contain your laughter at that point. Both of them were adorable, and so was their brotherly bond. As the conversation continued, you shared a bit about yourself. Yeah, you were still a little nervous about it, but alcohol was called liquid courage for a reason, and it was helping greatly.

“So, how come you live in the house you do?” Dean finally asked you, sounding curious.

The question threw you off, and your smile faded, “It’s been my home for so long, I don’t know, I just didn’t know where else to go,” you answered a bit quietly. Part of you felt embarrassed about your home, especially after seeing how the brothers lived. 

“Why not use your powers? Change it up?” Dean asked her.

Sam looked between the two. He had only seen the outside, although you were pretty sure that Dean had told him how your home looked on the inside. “I didn’t want to bring attention to myself. Only having a part-time job, I wasn’t sure how I’d explain the changes to the few friends I had.” You tried not to sound embarrassed, but it came out anyway.

“Makes sense. What about your family, though? They know you have powers,” Dean asked.

You shrugged a little, “I like my job and the people I work with… but…” you began, then trailed off, looking down at your beer. “With the King of Hell after me, not sure there is a safe place anymore.” Your tone had gotten quiet as the realization hit you. Where could you go at this point? You didn’t want to endanger your family, so that was out.

“Hey, I didn’t mean to make you sad,” Dean told you softly, leaning a little further forward.

When you saw him slowly reaching his hand toward yours, you held onto your beer and leaned back in your seat, putting more distance between the two of you. You did notice how he sighed and leaned back, though.

“It’s just… I don’t want to put them or anyone in danger because of me,” you replied, sipping your beer.

“Well, you’re welcome to stay here as long as you’d like,” Dean told you, making a smile play across your lips.

Part of you did miss your home, your friends at work, and the solitude your home had given you. However, you also began to enjoy being at the bunker with the brothers. You weren’t used to living with people and were still in the adjustment phase. With getting to know them more, you were hoping that things might feel less tense. After another half hour, your sides hurt from laughing so much. You couldn’t figure out how the dragon was sleeping through it all. Five beers was your limit, and you were on your fifth. Things were going amazing up until Sam said what he did about someone called Rowena. Your mood instantly tanked, excusing yourself to bed the moment you finished your beer.

You scooped up the sleeping dragon and made it to your room, only slightly wobbly on your feet. Once your door was closed, you set the dragon on the side of your bed and changed into pajamas. Climbing under the covers, you just sat there momentarily, wrapping your arms around your legs.

Could Rowena get into the bunker? Am I even safe here anymore? Am I putting the brothers in danger just by being here? Would the witch do the spell without consent? What would I even do if she did that?

Too many questions raced through your mind, even allowing a couple of tears to slip from your eyes. You wiped them away and turned off your lamp, then got comfortable on your side facing the sleeping dragon.

“I don’t want them to be in danger because of me,” you whispered, setting your hand on the dragon’s back.

An image of bubbles played in your mind. All kinds of different bubbles: soap bubbles, the kind that kids make with those bottles of bubbles from the store, bubbles in bodies of water, bubbles in a boiling pot of water, bubbles you make when you blow in a straw in chocolate milk. You furrowed your brow and looked at the sleeping dragon.

“Bubbles,” you said quietly, then rolled your eyes, remembering earlier. Dean had called her that after he’d given her bacon. If you weren’t as emotional as you were at the moment, you might have gone down a different thought path than the one that took over your mind. Anger hit you first, along with jealousy, all aimed at Dean. With all that had happened over the last week, you really weren’t thinking clearly; right now, anger was easier. The alcohol wasn’t helping either.

Bubbles shifted a bit in her sleep, stretching some and getting comfortable again, closer to you. You wanted to talk to Astaria again but at the same time, you didn’t. Then, you wanted to cry but didn’t do that either. The anger was easier to hold onto, almost making you feel grounded. 

Morning came far too soon. You hadn’t dreamt that night, and it was only after five in the morning, according to the clock on the night table. 

“Why can’t I just sleep in,” you grumbled just as Bubbles jumped on your chest, looking down at you like a happy puppy.

You giggled and began petting it, “What? Are you hungry?” you asked her, smiling a little.

You were still angry, but not like you were the night before. When Bubbles tilted her head, and you had an image of a forest come to your mind, you realized what she needed.

“Ohh, you need to go outside,” you said quietly, wondering if you could even do that.

Bubbles vigorously nodded her head, making you giggle again. “Can you use the toilet? I’m not sure I can take you outside or if it’s safe.”

She tilted her head as if she had no clue what you were talking about. “Come on. I’ll show you.”

You used your powers, changing into jeans, a tank top, and a red flannel, leaving it unbuttoned, then headed down the hall to the bathroom, Bubbles flying and keeping up with you. The idea of showing a dragon how to use a toilet had only come to mind due to funny cat videos you’d seen of cats using the bathroom. 

Bubbles watched you, her head tilted, and she looked puzzled and curious. You could barely stifle your laughter at the entire situation. When you finished, you flushed the toilet, then looked over at her as she was perched on the countertop.

“Your turn. Think you can attempt it?” you asked her.

She looked from you to the toilet and then back at you, making you giggle quietly, “Want me to wait outside?” She nodded, so you waited out in the hall, trying not to laugh. 

The toilet flushed moments later, and then the door opened. You glanced over as Bubbles hopped down off the counter and joined you in the hallway, “Feel better?” you asked, stifling another giggle.

Bubbles nodded, so you headed to the kitchen, figuring the brothers were still sleeping, with her flying alongside you. While the coffee brewed, you began writing out a list of items that you’d need for baking. You still wanted to do that, even if you were still feeling annoyed at Dean knowing your familiar's name before you did. 

When you got up to get a cup of coffee, Bubbles hopped onto the floor, went to the fridge, and looked at you. The word “food” came to mind, but you weren’t hungry, so you sat back down at the table, returning to the list you had been working on.

Bubbles got annoyed at your stubbornness, but you missed the dragon roll its eyes. She walked over to you and tugged on your jeans, causing you to look down at her. “What?” you asked her, having no clue what she wanted.

She looked over at the fridge and then back up at you, “Are you hungry or something?” She nodded at your question and went back over to the refrigerator, then waited for you.

As you joined her at the fridge, opening it up, you peered inside, wondering what dragons even ate. What you didn’t notice was that Bubbles was already opening one of the bottom drawers and pulled out a green apple. She held it in her hands as she flew over to the bench seat next to where you’d been sitting earlier.

“So, what do you want?” you asked, looking down.

When you didn’t see her, you got a puzzled look and glanced around the kitchen, barely seeing her head above the edge of the table. Closing the fridge, you were still puzzled but shrugged it off and went back to the task of the list. Bubbles had been watching you as you wrote down items on your list. Then, it jumped up on the table and took the pen from you, setting its apple on the table.

“It’s a pen. You use it to write things,” you told her, chuckling a little.

Bubbles flipped over the piece of paper and attempted to write. It was clear that writing was something she had never done before, as it looked like the scribbles of a toddler. She glared at you, and you did your best not to laugh, no matter how cute she looked.

“It takes time to learn how to write,” you told her, then thought for a moment, “Come with me into the library.”

With that, you got up, grabbed your coffee, and headed into the library. There were still books strewn across the tables, so you used your powers, stacking them up neatly in a few piles. Then, you created some things to help Bubbles learn how to write. You weren’t quite sure how much she could understand, so you went with the basics: the alphabet and kindergarten stuff, along with a pad of paper and a pencil so she could erase. 

You sighed and sat in one of the chairs, wondering why she wasn’t communicating with you telepathically. Then, the anger flared back up because she’d communicated with Dean the day before, at least her name. You didn’t know about the other stuff. Using your powers, you retrieved the list you’d left on the kitchen table, along with the pen. Then, you continued your list while having coffee, and Bubbles taught herself how to write.

----------------------------------------- Chapter 20

Tag List: @djs8891 @deans-spinster-witch

Link to the series Master List

A/N: If you'd like to be tagged in future chapters, leave me a comment, and I'll make sure to tag you.

[sunshinejeonglixie]

Coming Out - Bang Chan

tags: sfw, nonbinary reader, afab reader, coming out, anxiety, bang chan x reader, lots of comfort & softness from Chan, all around just sweet and wholesome even with the anxiety

a/n: I was gonna write all 8 parts of this into one post and just have it be a "coming out to skz as nonbinary" post but then I got halfway through this and decided it would be far too long to put them all in one so we're starting with Chan and going from there. I'll finish all 8 at some point (not tonight but probably within the next couple weeks all the parts will be done)

!!Everything written here is fiction, not meant to be taken as real life, if anything here makes you uncomfortable please just block & move on!!

You and Chan were a great couple, you’d been together for a little over 3 years now & everything was perfect. But then you started questioning your gender and in your mind everything came crashing down. After about 4 months of thinking and questioning, you’ve finally come to terms with the fact that you’re nonbinary.

You had no idea what Chan would think or what to tell him. You knew that he accepts lgbtq+ people of course, you both had multiple friends that were part of the community, but that doesn’t mean he’d still be interested in dating you. Your brain was just too full of all the what ifs. Everything that could change if you told him how you felt.

Finally, you decided to just rip the band-aid off and tell him. He needed to know. This was something important about you and you were honestly getting even more nervous the longer you waited so you needed to get it over with.

You picked a day when he wasn’t going to be super busy, and you had the day off so you could go over to the studio during his lunch break. You picked up your favorite food on the way, hoping it could bring you some comfort and calm your nerves. The walk up the stairs of the JYP building was extremely nerve-wracking, you almost turned back about 4 times before you finally got to the right floor. Taking a deep breath, you slowly opened the studio door to find 3racha hanging out in there, an unexpected sight since Chan said he was working alone today.

“Ah! y/n!” Han smiles & waves

“Hey y/n!” Changbin leans around Han to wave as well.

“My baby!” Chan giggles, excited to see you.

“oooh, food for us?” Han reaches out to the bag in your hand.

“uhh no sorry guys, I only bought for Channie & I. I didn’t know you’d be here too.”

Han pouts but accepts it and moves back to where he was.

“We were actually getting ready to head out for lunch anyways” Changbin says, packing up his backpack and telling Han to grab his stuff too.

“We’ll work on it more later, yeah?” Chan asks as they walk out the door, both of them nod and head on their way.

As soon as the other boys are gone you’re reminded why you came here and the nerves set in again, trying to force your whole body not to start shaking.

“what’s wrong?” Chan asks, immediately sensing your anxiety.

Your mind races, no words come out and you can’t even think of a real sentence to start this conversation. Before you know it tears are falling from your eyes and Chan is pulling you into his lap in his chair, holding you close.

“Hey, take a deep breath, what’s going on? Talk to me please” Chan speaks softly.

You take a deep breath before finally just letting it all spill out.

“I feel like I’m not a girl and I know you probably hate me and want to break up so I should probably just go.” You ramble while trying to climb out of his lap, expecting him to push you out any second.

“Woah what?” Chan says before taking a second to process all that information you just threw at him.

Finally, he finds the right words to respond, pulling you back into his lap fully while you continue to cry.

“How long have you been holding all that in?” is the first question he asks, face and voice filled with concern.

“Like… 4 months probably” you hang your head, feeling slightly guilty you kept it from him all this time.

Hearing that, Chan’s heart breaks. The idea that you’ve been struggling all alone and feeling like you can’t come to him all that time makes him hurt.

“I understand if you want to break up Channie…” you say, not knowing what to do with his silence.

“What?! No! Why would I want to break up?” He genuinely sounds confused.

“Because you like girls… and I’m not that.”

“Baby no I love you for you. If you feel like you’re not comfortable as a girl then it’s my job to take care of you the best I can and help you.”

You melt at his words, just curling into him closer. So thankful that he’s not upset with you and doesn’t want to leave you. After a bit of silence and just trying to settle your anxiety, Chan speaks up.

“Do you want to use different pronouns?”

“I would prefer to use they/them pronouns.”

“What do I call you now? Like not my girlfriend anymore but what do you want instead?”

“I haven’t thought about it much, I think just partner is fine.”

“Are you wanting to change your name?”

“No, I’m ok with it now.”

Chan pauses, thinking of more questions that could be important.

“Should I just say baby now instead of baby girl?”

“Yeah I’d like that” you get a little shy, just loving that he loves you so much and cares about how to make you comfortable.

He pauses again, obviously thinking about something.

“What is it Channie?”

“Earlier this week, I called you a good girl when we were uhm yaknow…” he trails off, ears red with embarrassment.

“Channie just say it please” giggling and rolling your eyes about how he has no shame when you guys actually have sex but afterwards he can’t even say what you did without looking like he’s going to burst into flames from embarrassment.

“You know what I mean. But when I said that you kinda like, zoned out or something. Took a second to get you back in the moment I mean. Is this why?”

“Yeah…” You feel bad because you really do love the praise, just not the gendered portion of it.

He sighs, disappointed in himself more than anything. He never wants to make you feel uncomfortable so knowing he did, and he didn’t even think much about it makes him mad at himself.

Noticing his sadness, you try to comfort him a bit.

“Channie there’s no way you could’ve known it would make me uncomfortable you say that all the time, how are you supposed to suddenly know?”

“I should’ve noticed babe; I’ve been your boyfriend for 3 years I should be able to tell when something’s changed.”

He pulls you even closer, if that’s even possible at this point with how tight he’s holding you, and just takes a deep breath before talking again.

“Shit I probably sound like this is all about me and how I feel, I’m sorry my baby it’s not about me” he apologizes.

“No no it’s ok Channie I understand what you meant; I know this is an adjustment for you too.”

The two of you continue to sit together in a comfortable silence for a while before you hear footsteps and the door opening with Han and Changbin returning to work again.

“Ewww get a room” Han jokes, seeing you in Chan’s arms.

“Uh believe it or not this isn’t your studio.” Chan reminds.

“Technically they had a room already.” Changbin points out.

“Ay woah Changbin hyung you’re supposed to be on my side.” Han whines

“Now why would I do that?”

“Alright alright quit whining I’ll let you guys work” you say, starting to get up before Chan pulls you back down quickly.

“Don’t leave yet baby” he pouts.

“Chan you guys have work to do.” You scold while laughing.

“I can work while you’re here.” He argues.

“Bullshit you cannot.” Changbin points out.

“Yeah hyung last time you tried to work with her here it took like a week longer to get the song done.” Han agrees.

Chan notices you cringe just a bit at Han referring to you as “her”, running his hands through your hair to comfort you a bit before leaning down and whispering to you.

“Do you want to tell them? Should I?”

“You please… I can’t do it all again myself today.”

Chan clears his throat before speaking up over Han and Changbin who had moved on to some other random topic.

“Actually, Hannie it’s them, not her.”

“Huh?” Han had completely forgotten anything he’d said more than 30 seconds before

“You said her, referring to y/n. They actually use they/them pronouns now.” He tells them.

“Oh, sorry y/n!” Han smiles

“Cool, good to know.” Changbin says before they move back to their conversation.

You smile, hiding your whole face in Chan’s chest, just so overjoyed that your boyfriend loves you exactly as you are, and his friends are cool with it too. You know he’ll take care of you and protect you no matter what against anyone and it makes you feel so safe and warm inside.

[i-promise-i-am-not-on-drugs]

Allllllll right, 08×02 rewatch rambling, let's go!!

This episode is going to make me emotional, I know that all ready.

1) Hopper and the scientists (+the demodogs ig)

Hopper: You sure 'bout that glass?

Bro was so real for that--

2) Mike and Bob

My boy's so smart :3

3) Demogorgons (+dead scientists ig)

Yay, death! :D (/j)

4) Mike, Will, Joyce, and Bob

I already said that and I'll say it again: Mike's so smart, I love my son.

And here is the famous "Ur Mom!" scene lol-- (sorry)

Alright, more seriously, seeing Will like must have been mildly traumatizing for Mike and Joyce don't you think? :(

Also, that one shoot of Mike slapping his hands on his ears to not ear Will... Poor boy must have felt so guilty, even if he knew it was the best thing to do. :((

5) the camera room (or something)

Holy cow.

Alright, I'm going to talk about my boy!! :D

Because there's never enough opportunities to talk about Mike's traumas <33

Imagine being Mike Wheeler, a 12 year old boy who's best friend is being possessed by some supernatural monster that is trying to murder everyone and everything around it. And now, you're locked in a room with lots of adults that you know very little to nothing about (except Joyce), and you're seeing in live people being killed and devoured by some other supernatural creatures that are also trying to murder and eat everything and everyone around them. AND, on top of that, all lights just went off for no apparent reasons. Also, you're feeling extremely guilty of all this because you think you could've prevent all of it from happened, if only you asked your best friend to have a sleepover with you a year before that. And how easy would've that been? It's not like you couldn't have done it, you just "weren't in the mood" that night, so of course it's your fault Michael!!--

Anyway. You got me. :)

6) the Mayfield house

Ew, Neil.

I still dislike Billy, but even this guy doesn't deserve to be treated like that. :(

(He was looking pretty good too! I like his eyes.)

7) Dustin, Lucas, Max, and Steve

I love Dustin and Lucas's fight honestly, it really shows how important the rules and honestly are for the party. (Also shows how different their's and byler's fight was--)

Also,

Max: No, no, no. Hey, guys, why are you headed towards the sound??

No because she's so real for that honestly, they were pretty dumb here ToT

8) the Lab

The way Mike's nerdy brain most likely know some BASIC and Hopper doesn't even know what it is lol--

Also, I'm like 80% sure that Dr.Owens know BASIC (at least enough to do what they were talking about) and just didn't want to go on a suicide mission. ._.

Anyway, I already feel sad for Bob help me :((

9) Stoncy, Lumax, and Dustin

Jonathan and Nancy were flabbergasted to see Steve here lol--

Also, Max must be so confused like "...Who are these people again?"

9) Bob

Poor man would've been traumatized as hell if he was still alive. :(

10) Stoncy and the kids

Why are you so agressive Dustin? Poor Jonathan was doing the same thing as you did! ToT

11) Bob (+others)

He's so smart he's so smart I'm so sad AAAAAHHHH!! :(((

NOOOOO, don't forget the guuunnn!!! ༼⁠;⁠´⁠༎ຶ⁠ ⁠۝ ⁠༎ຶ⁠༽

(Also, Dustin's "I did it! :D" was so cute lol)

12) Hopper, Mike, Will, and Joyce

They way they were so fucking lucky to get out without seeing any Demogorgons ToT

13) Bob and Owens

JSJISIZKKSMMCXLZRQZRWDTXLFJVUVGUCGDJWSURWWURXFIUGCPUVUPGFCYSWEAQRZSIFYPVUIBPIPHIYCXDTUSRWZUOCYBIPPNNINUHLCFTWZZAAYEXTCGUVVUPUOGXTESRZXETEOCUBBPGCRTWZWRZVUP!!!!!! This scene is so nerve wracking it's killing me!! And I already know how it ends!!!! ToT

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHGGGGGGJHHLJDTLUTDDRULLXUULHFLUTDOYRSOGYOGOYGIYLUXTIDYFDIYDYI I STILL CAN'T BELIEVE THIS STUPID HANDLE IS THE ONLY REASON WHY BOB DIED AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!

༼⁠;⁠´⁠༎ຶ⁠ ⁠۝ ⁠༎ຶ⁠༽༼⁠;⁠´⁠༎ຶ⁠ ⁠۝ ⁠༎ຶ⁠༽༼⁠;⁠´⁠༎ຶ⁠ ⁠۝ ⁠༎ຶ⁠༽

(and also because he's a slow runner, but let's not ruin the mood.)

14) Joyce, Hopper, Mike, Will, and Jancy

(⁠༎ຶ⁠ ⁠෴⁠ ⁠༎ຶ⁠)

The way Mike runs to hug Joyce and push her to the car (⁠╥O╥⁠)

15) Everyone

BE FAST Y'ALL

16) "Bob"

I did NOT need to see that by the way. The 3D model thing is making me a bit uncomfortable.

17) Everyone

Hopper: I AM THE POLICE--

Lmao.

Joyce :(((

Mike trying to lift the other's mood while still being in shock of seeing so many people (INCLUDING BOB) dying in front of him :((((

The kids are so intelligent I love them <33

MIIIIKKKKKKEEEEEE BABY YOU'RE SO SMAAAARRRRTTTTTTT!!!

And you're also going to HATE your own idea in approximately 15mins. Yahoo.

Stancy... Yeah no. Break up already please.

Lucas and Dustin's talk ToT

Honestly I feel like Mike's trying to push Max away because he's scared that if he lets her actually be in the party, it would mean that he takes responsibility on her (because he's the paladin yk), and he doesn't want that because he feels like he's already failing everyone on that part. He doesn't want to feel responsible for someone else's life turning even more shitty.

Also, he's probably trying to not "remplace" El. (Survivor's guilt, yk?)

Jonathan and Joyce... I guess they're never escaping this realistic VS optimistic thing. :(

(I'm going to call this patched up place "interrogation room'' because yes.)

18) Byers house (Dustin, Nancy, Steve, Lucas, and Max)

Max: Yeah but.. But if he finds us?

Lucas:... Judgement day.

I mean, you can say it like that.

19) Interrogation room (Will, Joyce, Jonathan, Hopper, and Mike)

Mike bitting his nails off and hiding his hands under his armpits to try to comfort himself.. :((

Also, the light are flittering!! Will's powers??

MIKE'S EEEYYYYESSSS AAAAAAHHHH (⁠༎ຶ⁠ ⁠෴⁠ ⁠༎ຶ⁠)

Joyce's monologue is just making me so happy... Imagine a little 8 years old Will, drawing his huge rainbow ship with this new(!!) 120(!!!) crayon set. He must have been so happy. :')

Jonathan's monologue toooo... My babies. :(

I really want to see them make castle byers honestly.

(alright, time for the big deal™)

THE WAY MIKE WAS ALREADY CRYING WHEN WE SEE HIM FOR THE FIRST TIME AND HOW WILL'S EYES START WATERING TOO I CAN'T APKXKDJSIDOZJJZODKFJBFKZOZIJ TOT

Also, can we talk about how Joyce and Jonathan had shoots of other people's faces during their monologue, and Mike absolutely didn't? It's just him and Will. MikeandWill, WillandMike, always.

Also, the way Hopper was just standing there like "🧍" LMAO--

He say the morse code though!! Good job Hopper!!! (IT'S THE HAND THAT MIKE WAS HOLDING AAAJKDKSPODJLDKEKZODJNDKQOSJDBJSODKFJJSODKDJZJKAK)

20) Everyone (-Will)

Steve: What's that?

All the kids: Morse code.

Lmao--

21) Interrogation room

(vibbing with "should I stay or should I go")

All of those little monologues are so sweet ToT💕

I especially love the truck one, Will is literally the kindest, sweet, most adorable little boy in the world, and I love him so much.

22) Byers house

Holy hell, phone murder.

23) interrogation room

Yep, they're cooked! Baked as bread!! Fried as chicken!!! :'D

24) Everyone

(MIKE HOLDING A CANDLE HOLDER LIKE A SWORD LMAO---)

Max: Is it dead?

Well I mean, I hope so--

ELEVEN BABY YOU'RE BAAAAACCCCKKKKK!!!! I love you my girl.

Bro the long mileven eyes contact is making me almost uncomfortable, the both look high help ToT

Annnd, here comes the end of this episode!!! I'll probably do the last one tomorrow.

It was nice to write everything down like this, tho I don't think I'll be doing it while rewatching ST3 and ST4 because it's very time consuming. (This episode is 48 minutes long and I've been here for literally two hours help me out ppl)

I really like this episode, but I do think that if the last one was very plain, then this one was extremely crowded. Still loved it tho!! :)

Alright, thank you for reading my rant lol, have a nice day/night/whatever!

[bronze-bell]

(The border appears scratchy, yet there is something winding around, softer, as if to keep such things from going too far. The letter's ink is black, the paper tinged with blotches of watercolor at the sides that blur the border further.)

Dear Victor Grantz,

It's good to know that the two of you were involved in reading these letters. I'll have to be more conscious of my delivery timings, especially for more... sensitive things.

It helps that this place brings people back, and with any condition comes the recovery period. Certainly, there are... many unpleasant ways for one to meet one's end. I'm glad this experience was... not one of those, by the sound of it. I have so, so many questions.

Don't worry about it, however your voice comes out, I quite enjoy it. When you know the pain of not having the ability to live expressing your own voice, you learn to value the chances you get to share your own and hear others in return. I... feel confident in the case we're all lonely, given what I know. But we have each other now, don't we?

I... see. I don't want to ask too many questions, especially since Aesop has also told me very little and I doubt prying would do much good for any of us, but the limited information I do have... Aesop told me how nervous he was about everything. How afraid he was that he'd mess something up, make you hate him. He said other things I don't understand due to my lack of knowledge in embalming, of course, but it's evident he cares a lot about making sure you're okay, as comfortable as possible. I'm glad his fears did not come to fruition. I've sent a response reassuring him. Maybe a third party telling him it's okay will help.

None out of the three of us expected this, then. I... suppose knowing us, I shouldn't be surprised we were caught off guard by how fast this all happened. I shouldn't be so worried I'm glad you two get along so well. I won't pretend I've had the chance to experience these kinds of relationships myself, but I've seen plenty and heard enough people gossip about their partners that I have... a picture. You two wouldn't do that, though. If either of you do... I cannot guarantee I'll take it well.

Of course I enjoy our conversations. I truly feel like we're both a part of this, as opposed to an unbalanced mess where only one person steals the spotlight. If you need someone to advise where to place your bets, I'll be here. Who knows if the dice are loaded in some tables.

Sincerely,

Frederick

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

The letter set is mostly plain pale red, with small darker stars printed on both the paper and envelope encasing it. It's a pleasing set of shades, bleeding into each other in contrast to black writing that stands out quite easily.

[Dear Frederick,

It probably shouldn't be a problem if people find out we're talking, per se (although I'd still like to avoid that prospect if I can), I'm mostly just worried about if they find out what we're talking about.

If you have questions, maybe you could ask us in person? I'm honestly glad as well. Death being temporary here eases a lot of my worries, truthfully. I hope if I get stuck in a painful loop forever that you'll at least try to save me... There is definitely a recovery period, I'll say that. Partial paralysis, and a very uncomfortable coldness. Next time I'll prepare a blanket in advance.

It's... Admittedly strange having someone to talk to. Even as "a mute who can speak" there was definitely not a lot of talking even before they It's very nice. I like talking to both of you a lot. Thank you for not forcing me to making me speak verbally, I've never been good at it. We have eachother. It's wonderful.

It's very sweet of you to assure him. The secret of him telling you these things is safe with me. I didn't know how worried he was, but I suppose it's understandable. It's always It must be nerve wracking to kill someone, especially someone you care about so much. With his anxiety, I did expect something like this. It's very considerate of him. If I see him I'll tell him how kind he is again.

It's okay to be worried, things do seem to be happening very fast. We are not "partners" though, to be clear. I don't think I could fall in love that fast romantically, although I could and have platonically. I have also seen many... marriage disputes, in my line of work, so I know exactly where you're coming from here.

I trust both of you tremendously, I feel like you need to know that. They said I was too loyal and I think they're right I am glad we can all have our turn in this play of life. Please don't leave me or hurt me of die like s

I'm sorry. I don't know what's coming over me today. I'm certainly lonely, aren't I? Thank you for being patient with me so far. It's more than I'd ever ask of you.

Kindest regards, Postman.]

[whump-bunny]

From your ask game post:

Whumper:

1) How did you acquire your whumpee? How hard it was?

8) How would you describe your whumpee?

26) Do your friends/teammates/coworkers help you to tame your whumpee? Do you allow anyone to handle them?

Whumpee:

8) How would you describe your whumper?

12) Which of your whumper’s rules you find harder to obey?

49) Tell everything you’ve ever wanted to say to your whumper (we won’t tell anyone!)

* Feel free to ask anything back if you want, I think it'll be super fun answering these in character!

Thanks for asking! These are really fun! (Here is the original post for reference)

Adam:

1) How did you acquire your whumpee? How hard was it?

“If I'd had it my way, I would have had Asa from the moment he was born. He is my son, after all. Unfortunately, his foolish mother hid him from me. It wasn't until he was 14 years old that he was finally captured by my research company. They found him running through the woods with some random kid he kept calling his “brother.” After he was taken into custody, I had my top scientist, Dr. Hamlin, experiment on him until I was sure he had the power I needed. After that, it was easy for me to simply walk into the Facility and take him out while he slept. When he awoke, I introduced myself as the one who saved him. He didn't suspect a thing.”

8) How would you describe your whumpee?

“He's a stubborn little brat. He reminds me of myself at his age, in the worst way. But as his father, it's my duty to guide him towards his best interest, even if he doesn't realize that right now. Though, I have to admit, there is something endearing about the boy."

26) Do your friends/teammates/coworkers help you to tame your whumpee? Do you allow anyone to handle them?

“I'd say Dr. Hamlin played a major part in breaking his spirit. That woman is insane, but she's damn good at her job. In truth, I wouldn't have trusted anyone but her to study Asa.”

Asa:

8) How would you describe your whumper?

“He's a nutjob. He thinks he's saving the world, but he's destroying it. He says he's doing this for me, that it's for my own good, but the only person he's doing this for is himself.”

12) Which of your whumper’s rules you find harder to obey?

“Adam doesn't really have hard, specific rules. Which honestly makes interacting with him even more nerve-wracking. I never know if something I'll say will make him laugh or make him hit me. So I've learned to try not to speak at all. But even that can be risky if he thinks I'm ignoring him. Though… there is one thing I know not to mention. He used to have a daughter… but the last time I brought her up, Adam didn't feed me for three days.”

49) Tell everything you’ve ever wanted to say to your whumper (we won’t tell anyone!)

“If your daughter were here, she would hate you. Just like I do.”

[mischievouslittlecreature]

Hello! I hope you're having a lovely day/night! 😊 Just had to pop in to show some love for your writing. I stumbled upon your fic, Love Me Where I'm Most Ruined, a lil while back and I'm obsessed??? I flew through it so quickly, I just couldn't stop reading! I apologize for not leaving comments as I went, it's like I was in a trance, just had to keep reading 😭😂😂 I'm also somewhat new-ish to the fandom and interacting kinda gives me anxiety, but I'm working on it lol. I'm gonna do a re read sometime soon and I'll let you know my thoughts, gonna spam you with love probably, your story certainly deserves all the love. 🥰❤️❤️ I also see that you've recently rewritten/edited some parts? As if I needed another excuse to re read this whole fic 🤭 Truly, one of my absolute favorite fics I've read. I love the story you've built and I adore your characters so much. I'm in love with Lucy, for real. Obsessed with her. I also haven't read many fics (if any) that are pro Grace. I think that can be a bit controversial in the peaky fandom?(sadly) But holy shit!! I LOVE how you wrote her whole storyline. You broke my heart tho, but I still loved it! 😂 I didn't intend this ask to be so long, please forgive my rambling! You posted your latest chapter on my birthday and girl. Birthdays aren't always the easiest for me and this one was kinda rough. Honestly, reading your fic was kinda the highlight of my day. An unexpected delight! A little gift you didn't even know you were giving me! I literally squealed in excitement lol! Anyways, I just wanted to say thank you for sharing your stories. Your writing is so, so beautiful and I can't believe your fic doesn't have more notes. Honestly, it's criminal! I'm seeing it pop up on my dash again and I just had to show you some love!! 🥰❤️❤️ Also, it's still Valentine's Day where I am, so I felt all the love was a little fitting. ❤️ I hope this novel of an ask finds you well. 😘❤️

-🦋

Oh my goodness, anon, thank you so, so much! Seriously, my heart is practically bursting right now I just wanna reach through the screen and give you biggest hug! 🥰

It means SO MUCH to me that you've loved Lucy and my fic so much 😭 I have quite a few OCs, but Lucy in particular is very near and dear to my heart, so to hear that you love her so much just makes me so happy.

I would LOVE to hear your thoughts if you do a reread! I don't like to pressure people too much to comment because I understand it can be nerve-wracking, but I promise I am literally the least intimidating person in the world and will be absolutely thrilled to hear what you think!

I did recently do a bit of a rewrite/edit, specifically of Red Right Hand. Nothing too crazy, but I did add a few more scenes with Grace and a few more smut scenes.

Grace is certainly a controversial figure in the fandom. I understand why people dislike her, and I never want to make people feel like they have to like her to read or even enjoy my fics, but at the same time I have a soft spot for her, and my vision for the series always included Grace and polyamory elements, despite it still being primarily Tommy x Lucy focused. I was quite nervous including the poly aspects of the story, and I know it turned a lot of people off to my fics, so I really appreciate your support for that particular part of the story! 🖤

And Happy Birthday! I'm so glad to hear that my fic made your day a little brighter! And Happy Valentine's Day as well! This really is the best gift anyone could have given me today!

I'm so sorry that it's been taking me longer to get updates out! I recently started an internship in January that's taking up more of my time, plus just dealing with a general lack of motivation lately. But I am hoping now that I'm more settled into my internship that I will have more time to write and will be able to get onto a more consistent posting schedule. I have SO MANY things planned for Lucy and Tommy and I hope that you enjoy them!

Again, thank you so, so much for this ask, 🦋! You've absolutely made my day! I am sending all of my love your way! 🖤🖤🖤

[bepoets]

odd numbers (In Dreams (I'll Meet You In Warm Conversation) )

Unwritten/Unpublished Fic Asks

Thank you, Trish!!🫶

Okay first of all, for those who don’t know, “In Dreams (I Meet You in Warm Conversation)” is my very lengthy title for a tedbecca soulmate au I’m writing where Ted and Rebecca meet each other in their dreams long before they meet in person! Everyone cross your fingers that eventually I finish it because it is one of my favorite things I’ve ever written!!

1. What are you most excited about when you start to write it/publish it?

Are y’all gonna think I sound a little conceited if I say getting comments,,, I’m Sorry!! It’s true!! I love validation!!! There is no cooler feeling than getting comments from my friends being excited about something I made!!! That’s so fun to me!!!

3. If unwritten, when do you think you will start writing it?

Technically Some of it is written!! But I’m going to try and work on it this month, like hardcore sit-down-and-focus-and-write-time type work on it.

5. Is there any scene you're excited about writing?

Honestly every single dream sequence!! They’re so fun, and so full of little references to their future in ways that I just think are really cool!! Also writing Ted and Rebecca at a variety of ages is both nerve wracking and exciting and I cannot get enough of it. There is one dream sequence in particular that I cannot wait to write, it’s a little heavy but I’ve got it pretty well planned out so I can’t wait to tackle it!!

7. What are your plans for -Rebecca-?

My plans follow pretty closely to canon for s1 so far. Seeing as Ted and Rebecca don’t realize they’re dreaming with each other even after they’ve met in person because of … reasons !!!

Anyway!!! It sticks pretty close to the canon of s1 but I do have plans for Rebecca having a silly little tizzy when she realizes the person she’s been dreaming of for decades is Ted. Very much Rebecca dancing and yelling “top of the pops!” in s1e9 vibes but like … More. I really love when that woman is a little insane🥰

9. Is there anything in the fic you're not so excited about writing?

I’m pretty excited to write all of it!! I’ve been in love with this idea for so long I just want it to meet my little daydream expectations!! However, there are some parts where I have multiple options for how things could go and I’m not looking forward to choosing one because I love them all so much

11. Is there any scene you can't wait for people to react to when reading? Why?

A couple different ones!! I think their first dream meeting is very sweet and soft, and I’m really hopeful people that people will enjoy that!! As well as the big emotional dream sequence. Also I just love seeing the different things that people end up loving that I didn’t anticipate so like…all of them, all the scenes

13. Is there any unwritten/unpublished fics you haven't mentioned you're gonna do?

Considering I haven’t mentioned any of my unwritten/unpublished fics on tumblr the answer is so fucking many❤️ my brain won’t slow down it’s so many ideas and so little words!!! But there are a select few that I’m really really trying to push through and finish soon!!

15. Do you have any unwritten scene that you think about a lot?

For “In Dreams” I am literally always thinking about Rebecca’s inner monologue for when she meets Ted in person for the first time. It’s always there. Rattling around in my brain. It’s not written down but I have replayed it - at minimum - seven million times while folding laundry.

17. When publishing it, will you have a posting schedule or will you just update whenever?

I don’t intend to post it until it’s all written, but who knows!! If I do wait until it’s complete and it’s long enough for chapters like I’m planning it to be then I’ll post them 1 day at a time most likely! Or maybe once every other day.

19. Is there any scene that you feel is really planned out/going to be really planned out?

I have every dream they share before meeting in person very planned out!! In detail!!! Some of them are only planned out in my head but they are Planned!!! What I absolutely need to make very planned out is the reveal but that is a problem for future Brooklyn 😌

21. Is there any unwritten fic that you don't know if you ever will write?

For like a year and a half I’ve had a notes app page in my tedbecca fic plans folder that literally just says a lyric from the song “Marbles” by The Amazing Devil. (For those curious the lyric is “All the bastards applaud when I show that I’m flawed / You’re not flawed, darling, you’re just a little underrehearsed”) And I have tried so hard to figure out how I want to incorporate that or turn it into a fic and I really don’t think I’ll be able to!!! But damn do I love it!! So even if a fic never comes out of it, it’s still a nice lyric to think about and cry over!!

[onlyswan]

Hiii Art!! How have you been and how's your work/studies whatever it is that you do. Good? Eh? Well mine's kinda on a dry and wet mode rn lol.

Mind if I rant here?

I have 2wk worth of exams coming up and I have no motivation to study. I honestly regret taking up the course im studying for. I mainly took it up because its lucrative and helpful in today's economy. But honestly I should have just pursued 14yo Lyfie's dream to become a nurse. It wouldve been so much more rewarding🥲🥲🥲.

Anyways despite that im just praying my gpa doesnt go down the drain, and im gulity right now because i wasted the whole day doing nothimg even though i told myself to go study. I couldnt do it. I just......well i knew what i was doing was bad but everytime i looked at my notes i felt as if i knew them all, and in the end achieved nothing. Sigh i hate myself for how repetitve this unhealthy cycle has become. Parental pressure isnt helping either. I try ranting and they say its just momentary tiredness and it would go away soon and then further guilt me into wasting time :((((.

Wow that became long. Im so sorry for litterally trauma dumping on you, especially if tou had a long day. It would be the last thing you'd wanna worry about 😂😂😂

Anyways i wanted to ask you about your writing, both as a fellow fic author and as loyal reader of yours. What inspires you to write?

(I.e set time aside to write your fics and even feel motivated to open up that document? I have so many plot bunnies, headcanons and fic ideas, but no matter how enticing, everytime i try opening up my google docs, that burst of excited energy saps away. Urgh its so frustrating!!😠)

And for your fics, we had possible teases of engagement btwn jk and oc and even f2l hopelessly pining jk and oc. So i was wondering will we ever get a confession scene 👀👀👀?

I rmbr when jk ssid somewhr in an interview where he would love to lift his partner up and kiss them and my mind went str to the in which couple lol knowing your writing and since its jk its gonna be so cute cheesy and gonna involve tears 😇.

Funny enough i also know that both oc and jk are heavy on respecting e/o be it space or privacy, and when i heard Twice MISAMO's Do Not Touch song which was about consent and it was potryaed beautifully compared to art masterpeices, it got me thinking about their initial stages of skin ship or how they got comfortable around e/o physically or even their first time. Idk im just so invested in this universe lol 😭😂

Hmmm, but thats it for now. I'll reach out to you soon!!! :D

-Lyf

hiii lyf <3 work is draining and some customers are rude but my co-workers are fun to be with so it’s alright 🥲 uni also started this week and it’s nerve wracking but also soooo exciting !! i’m just gonna need some time to adjust to this new life + schedule 😬

i’m so sorry to hear that beloved :( i’m sure with the given the circumstances that you chose what you thought would be best for you at that time and i think it’s important that you recognize that too !! 🫂 and yesyes studying is so freaking difficult especially when you don’t feel motivated >:( for me personally time management has been pretty helpful. i love schedules ^^ sometimes i do house chores first to get my brain into work mode too and i give myself little rewards during break times (which are sooo important) or after studying hehe like snacks or screen time !! please look after yourself and your health. 🥺

dw i’m mostly fine with you guys ranting about stuff like school !! because same !! but i’m just putting it out there that when it’s abt triggering stuff i have to restrain myself 🥲 i don’t reply to those because it really affects me badly mentally too :(

hmmm when it comes to inspiration to write 🤔 like i said i do love schedules hehe i open a draft every night before bed + in my notes i also save words/phrases/scenarios that pop in my mind throughout the day but couldn’t write yet :D but i don’t really get to write everyday bcs i’m too tired or nothing just comes out. sometimes i only write one sentence or one paragraph then pass out lol. on a good day i finish one scene and maybe start writing the next too !! a jungkook weverse live will always 100% give me a big rush of motivation tho 🤭

and i doooo want to explore the earlier stages of oc and jungkook’s relationship 🥹🥹🥹 i have many many plans !! but i just want them to be perfect so it might take me a while </3 this is still a long journey if y’all are up for it hehe thank you so much for being invested in our little iw universe !! 🥰 it truly means the world to me that i get to enjoy my passion like this :") ilysm lyf 🫂

[dynjay]

Hum....

I'm a little sad tonight. I feel like I'm starting to come to terms with the idea that my partner and I are better off as amiable friends than romantic partners.

I've always felt this way to varying degrees throughout our time together, and tbh, I've been in denial about it for a while, but I'm starting to wonder if he feels the same way lately, which is really making me confront how I honestly feel about it all.

Part of me is scared of what'll happen when we finally talk about it. Although I'm in a position where I'm able to support myself, it's still pretty scary to branch out of a lifestyle I've grown so comfortable with. I'm also nervous about the scenario where he doesn't actually feel the same and things start getting really messy near the end.

On the flipside, part of me is also excited about the idea of living a more independent lifestyle. Being in this relationship taught me many things, and I'm very curious about how well I'd do if I had full reigns of my living space with what I know now.

My heart tells me this is bound to happen at some point and that ultimately, I'll be happier for it. My logic tells me even if things do get messy, it won't be the end of the world, and with time, it'll eventually heal. But even though I know what needs to be done, it's all still very nerve-wracking and I've lost a lot of sleep because of this.

The end of this relationship would mean the beginning of a notable change in both of our lives, and that's something I'm both nervous and somber about.

[taegularities]

RID 🫶🫶 HOW ARE YOU???

i hope you are having an AMAZING DAY! ❤️ the weather here is so good, im so happy :)

okay SUPER long tea alert; my friends recently peer pressured (not rlly) me into downloading tinder 🤭 ive always been pretty against tinder bc i wanna meet my soulmate irl and ppl on tinder tend to be pretty thirsty (not all, but most) 🤷‍♀️

but anyways, I FEEL CONFLICTED!! this one (who is so incredibly hot may i add 🤭) started texting me and oh god, hes so smooth. he teases a little and we haven't been texting long but he asked me out on a date for next friday! BUT THEN!!! this other guy, who is def more sweeter, also asked to get coffee with me this week. i said yes to both but idk I FEEL GUILTY! 🧍‍♀️ im a loyal girl and i keep having to remind myself that im single and dating like this okay... but idk it just feels strange? im sure im overthinking it, but god im nervous!!

also ive never been on an official date before (which makes this more nerve wracking😔) ive been on like "dates" but nothing where the guy intentionally says that he wants to take me out on a date 🧍‍♀️the last time i was about to go on a date, the man pretty much cancelled and never rescheduled, so i feel nervous even being excited about it bc what if they cancel?? (im def overthinking, i genuinely cant help it 💀)

but anyways, thats my current dilemma, any advice would help!!! i hope you are well and PLEASE take ur time w cmi!!! 🙏 i saw a couple of asks of ppl asking u to rush or work on two chapters at once... please dont listen! thats where burnout comes from! take your time (i will literally wait 10 years for another chapter) 🫡

- wife from war anon 💂‍♀️

BABE HELLO !!!! <3 i'm okay, just weirdly tired !! kinda glad uni is starting soon but also sad bc i won't be able to be here as much anymore 😔 but yes, the weather has gotten better here, too !! i saw the sun today 🥺

girl, the tea you just spilled has me dead 😭 okay listen, most important thing first: i was on tinder for over a year and the people on there are insane – some would fake their age, others would use someone else's pictures. i could dive into my strange ass tinder experience but 💀 next time lmaoo. but what i wanna say is – make sure those guys are who they say they are! and meet in a very public place, just in case... let someone know that you're on that date, just to be sure, okay??

BUT MOVING ON. LISTEN. two guys that you're vibing with? that's amazing 😭 it's absolutely okay to meet both, that's literally what tinder is for! if it makes you feel better, you could let the guys know that you've been meeting others, too, as friends/casually? but since you're not with any of them, it's fine to get to know people. you might even end up with new friends :D i honestly do hope though, that they don't cancel, reschedule or hurt you, or i'll start rolling up my sleeves lol

keep things casual for now! if any of them does end up cancelling, remember you're better than this 😌 and you might even find up someone better later! that's okay, dating apps are like that :') but seriously, don't feel guilty, go with the flow and have fun... and definitely lmk how things played out >:)

yesss, i'll take my time for sure! i just outlined that jk chapter, but i only work on it when i feel like it. i started rereading the series today to have a better overview of it, and got to our beloved chapter lights hehehe but yeah. definitely working at my own pace. thank you, babe. it'll be a ride <333