#this expression is inspired by the extreme stress I felt

[gearsphere]

Little doodled self portrait

[hobis-hope95]

Blessed by the Gods

fancast!Benjicot Blackwood x Bracken!fem!reader

Summary: You, the only daughter of Amos Bracken, had just been offered away in marriage to a man much older than you, and in the hopes of having some peace and quiet for you to express your anguish towards the Gods that allowed this, you go to a place you found a couple months ago - a beautiful clearing with flowers scattered around and a weirwood tree in the middle. You knew it was risky, as you'd seen him there before, but in a moment of distraction Benjicot Blackwood found you and now you must suffer the consequences.

Warnings: 18+, enemies to lovers, a little fluf (veeery little), kinda dom x sub, swearing, hunting (it's basicaly it but I don't know if there's another term for it, when you read you'll know), smut, porn with (very) little plot, fingering, p in v, unprotected sex, rough sex, breeding kink, praising kink.

Authors note: Heyy, so this is my very first time posting something I wrote (I do write a lot but mostly I get stuck and end up not finishing it) because I'm OBCESSED with Kieran Burton since I saw him in the goddamn teaser, plus I've been reading plenty of fanfics of him and two of them particularly inspired me for this (I'm sorry, I don't remember the names or the authors to tag them). Last but not least, English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry for any mistakes.

You should hate him. You should’ve never been in that place, for you knew it was Blackwood territory, and should’ve heard him getting closer before. But you didn’t. You knew he went there frequently and if he saw you in the golden dress you wore in that particular place, he would definitely tell you to go back to your lands, but not without some provocation first. But that weirwood tree was so beautiful even if hidden in the middle of the woods, the flowers that bloom around it were so unique that you had to go there and admire them in a way to flee from the confinements of Stone Hedge. Or you told yourself that this was the reason you went there.

You found it the first time by accident. You had got lost in the woods, no track of a clearing nearby for you to situate yourself, when you saw the red leaves and decided to get near, for you knew that the weirwood roots extended long through the floor – making itself exclusive for a few yards in its radium – and you would be able to see the sky without the treetops being on your way. When you got there, though, the place was so gorgeous you could not leave right away.

After that, you tried to memorize as much of the path you could and return to that same place for moments of peace. That was until one day you heard footsteps – of one person it seemed – and you hushed to hide away. Moments later, hidden behind some bushes, you saw when no other than Benjicot Blackwood appeared through another end of the clearing where, you didn’t notice before, had a small trail that probably led straight to Raventree Hall.

Bloody Ben. Lord Blackwood. Lord of the house you were supposed to hate, and yet you found him so extremely gorgeous. You’d saw him only a few times. On Riverrun where your families sometimes were called by their Paramount Lord or near the stream that divided their lands, often arguing with your cousin in the company of a few others of his House and a few times you ended up being the victim, getting back home after slapping him across his face with his obscene remarks or just leaving after outsmarting the man – for the second you took much pride in.

On some of the times you’d been on the clearing you ended up having to hide when hearing his footsteps and waiting for him to leave before you could move. He’d mostly sit in one of the roots of the old tree and do whatever he felt like doing at the moment. You’d seen him reading, cleaning his sword, crafting some arrows and doing nothing at all, but he always stayed for about two hours before finally leaving.

Today however, probably because you were stressed with the news of your arranged marriage, you didn’t hear him getting close. When he saw your dress, the colour of your house shining through the rays of sunshine, a smirk crept in his face with the ideas he had in mind.

He knew it was wrong, hideous, the idea of wanting anything that came with the red stallion in a golden shield, your House’s coat of arms. He knew that from any woman he could want, you should not be a possibility. But with your hair that finished around your hips and a face that looked like a gift from the Gods, allied with your wits and challenging manner, he could not lie to himself that more than once he woke up in the middle of the night hot and bothered after a much-detailed dream about you – and eventually would handle his hardness with the thought of defiling you and making you his.

What he didn’t know, and you tried to deny it as much as you could, was that you also had conflicting thoughts about him. Since the first time you’d saw him in Riverrun, his face showing a mischievous glow with a smirk on his lips as your family entered the room, you fought with your own body as your heart raced and your cheeks burned in his presence. You hated the way he mocked your cousin and told you the lousiest of things, his lascivious expression making you hot and bothered as well, and you hated that every time you saw him, you knew that at the end of the day you would toss and turn for hours trying to erase his face from your mind.

You told yourself it was just because he was the only one who didn't walk on eggshells when talking to you – or anyone for that matter – and because you liked the challenge, but deep down you knew that your feelings for him were far from hatred, and the idea of trying to find out the true meaning of them scared you.

“Gods, have I done anything to anger you so that I’m faded to marry Forrester Frey? I would do anything, please!” You asked to the faced weirwood tree, knowing you’d have no answer but desperate enough to look like a crazy woman who talks to a tree by yourself. What you did not know was that someone did hear you.

Benjicot took his blade from his waist, taking extra care to not be heard, and when he got close enough to you, he acted quickly, one arm holding your body – your arms entrapped – and the one with the blade stopping on your neck.

“My, my, look what we have in here, a lost Bracken broodmare, far away from home” Her breath got caught up on her throat with the feeling of the cold blade on her skin and her heart jumped on her chest with his body pressed against her back and his voice so close to her ear “Good thing that I found you before any other predator did, huh?”

“Let me go, please!!” You pleaded, pure panic spilling from your voice, and Benji almost moaned – he had no idea that having you pressed against his body in panic would arouse him that much “Oh no, my darling, I could not do such a thing. You just committed a crime, you see, for you are far away from your father’s lands and what fair lord would I be if I do not punish criminals like you?”

“Please, I’ll vanish from your sight in less than a minute and no one will know about this, okay? Just please, let me go!!” Your eyes were burning with unshed tears with the thought of the possible punishment he had in mind, and you didn’t stay still, moving your body in an attempt to free yourself from him even if useless, as he was taller and way stronger.

“No, no, no, my darling, I could not possibly do that, your Bracken lord can play blind on your actions, but I am a serious ruler and punish all criminals as their crimes demand” He tightened his grip on your body, his fingers pressing harder against the clothed skin of your waist, and as he continually pressed on you, a warm feeling cursed through you until it reached in between your thighs “But what punishment would be enough? Thieves, who take things that don't belong to them, have their hands cut off. Murderers, who take lives that do not belong to them, pay with their own lives. Now you, who committed invasion of lands that don’t belong to you, what could I possibly do to punish you correctly?”

Once again you pleaded, ‘please’ sounding like a repeated prayer on your lips as he inhaled the sweet smell of your hair “I could not invade your father’s lands, or I would be committing a crime of my own” He stated as if he did not listen to your pleads and when he spoke again, his voice was huskier and low like a whisper “But I could invade your territory myself”

You hated yourself for how your body reacted to his words, your thighs squeezing together when you felt the heat on your lower belly grow, and hated even more that a side of you wanted him to go ahead with his threat full of mischievous intentions. Him, on the other hand, was more than pleased to hold you that way, his front fully in contact against your behind and his groin pressed against your back.

“Please, Benjicot, lord Blackwood, please” You repeated and started struggling even more when you felt his hard cock pressed against your back, trying to move away “Please, please! What, my lady, do you want me to do?” He mocked, repeating what you said in a higher pitch, as his hand with the knife left your throat and went to your hip “You want me to be gentle?”

Another wave of heat made you close your eyes for a second, a hard sigh leaving your lips and you didn’t answer. He laughed when he heard you “This is supposed to be a punishment, but I’ll make an exception if you behave” He said, his breath hot against your ear as the hand on your hip went further down and grabbed the skirt of your dress, pulling it up.

Your neck now free from the threat of his blade, an idea came to your mind. You were not sure if it would work, but it was your only hope, so you took it. Bending your head forward to gain some impulse, you took a deep breath – bracing yourself for the upcoming pain – and shook your head back with all your strength, hitting his head on the side.

Benjicot, surprised with what had just happened and with his head pulsating, faltered his grip on you long enough for you to get rid of his arm around you and start running, your head spinning and your vision still blurry from the blow. You felt and heard when the skirt of your dress ripped, before the other man’s hand lost its grip on the fabric, but you didn’t turn around to check the damage.

With your vision still recovering and the pulsing pain in your head, you headed to the woods, still not sure if you followed the right path, only caring about getting as far of him as possible. Benjicot, on the other hand, quickly recovered from the dizziness, the pain easily subsiding, and he growled before following you, euphoric and feeling his blood rush through his body straight to his cock with the expectation of hunting you down.

You ran as fast as you could, your breathing burning in your lungs and your legs aching, and tried to dodge the trees and bushes in your way. Even with all your efforts, you heard his steps and breathing not that far away, and fear crept inside you, being the one thing that prevented you from collapsing in that moment.

He knew those woods like his own chambers – losing track of how many times he went there to hunt, explore, have a moment of peace or take out his anger on the trees – and he had the advantage of being taller than you, his muscles trained for endurance in the battlefields, so even if you ran with all your strength, it would still be easy enough for him to reach you.

“Bracken!! Do not think you can run away from your punishment, you’re still on my lands” Your step became unsteady when his voice seemed closer than you imagined and after tripping over a tree root, you couldn't keep your balance, ending up falling with your body and arms protecting you from ending face first into the grass.

As you were turning to place your hands on the ground and help you stand, you heard a twig cracking right behind you and soon enough his voice made you turn your head “Poor mare, doesn’t know her way home, but don’t worry, I’ll show you when I finish your punishment if you want”

You tried to turn yourself so you could stand back up, but before you could do anything, he caught your ankle and pulled you closer, turning you to face him “No, no my darling, you’re not escaping me again, now come here, the quicker it starts, the quicker it finishes, if you want... or you could just enjoy it”

“No, no, no!!” You repeated like a prayer and when he positioned himself between your legs, you started to punch and scratch at his chest, face and arms “Calm down, I think I was mistaken, for you are not a mare but a kitten, but no need to show your claws. I know I said that I would be gentle if you behaved and you didn’t, but I do have a soft spot for beautiful girls like you”

Quickly enough, as if your efforts meant nothing, Benjicot grabbed both your wrists and held them above your head, leaning his body closer to yours – his groin pressing against the middle of your thighs and his mouth just a few inches away, his breath hitting your face.

“You know what surprised me about your behaviour just now?” He asked, looking at your eyes, before he kissed your jaw and a hand went to your ankle “Because every time I see you, be in the Tully’s assize or the boundary, you are always looking at me so needy that makes me want to fuck you right there”

He left open-mouthed kisses through your neck as you felt the hairs on your nape stand and his hand began to move up your leg through the fabric of your dress “So why now are you pretending you do not want this?” He moved his hips forward, his hardness pressing against your clothed folds, and you didn’t have the strength to hold a moan.

“Be-because I don’t! You Blackwoods are just so ugly that I’m surprised to see something like that in the middle of a crowd” You spat, trying to regain some of your pride, but he chuckled, lifting his head with a smirk.

“Act all you can, kitten, but that moan just annulled everything you said, you know” His hand now was in your inner thigh and as he stopped talking, his calloused fingers went straight to your folds. You bit the inside of your cheeks to hold your voice and furrowed your brows, but he still looked almost amused at your efforts.

“Fuck you” You twisted in his grip but could not move enough to escape his touch and he took the chance to move his index finger through your folds, watching as you closed your eyes and your hips grounded into his touch “Oh, my lady, deny it as much as you want, but your body will remain true to its desires”

His smirk grew wider, his tongue sliding through his teeth, as his thumb found your clit and he watched in pleasure as you clenched your jaw and your legs opened wider for him. He circled your bundle of nerves with his thumb while his middle finger slid down your folds, reaching your entrance, and didn’t waste the opportunity to shove his finger inside you to the point where only his last knuckle was visible outside.

You moaned loudly, having been caught off guard, and your walls tightened around his finger “Fuck, you’re so tight, it’ll feel delicious around my cock” Benjicot started moving his finger, almost completely withdrawing before plunging it back inside, while still rubbing his thumb through your clit, and soon enough you were a mess, your thoughts fogged with the pleasure his hand was giving you.

You didn’t even notice when his hand let go of your wrists, too caught up on the feeling of his finger inside you and his pace growing faster by the second, as you fought against the undeniable pleasure you were feeling, and when he curled up his digit inside you, the thin string of pride you hung yourself by collapsed, giving in to the urge of your feelings and enjoy as he claimed you.

“M-more, please” You whispered, completely giving in to the ache of your heart. That was why you could not stray your eyes from him at every assize, that was why you would walk too close to the boundary and why you would come all the way from Stone Hedge to that specific clearing with that specific weirwood tree.

Your heart wanted him and there was no denying it, not anymore, not when his middle finger curled inside you so deliciously that made you see stars through your eyelids and not when you caught a glimpse of him and he looked at you like a starved man “Say again, kitten? I didn’t hear you” He teased, thinking you had yet again tried to deny your wishes.

“More, please, Benjicot” You said before you moaned again, your eyes fully opening now with your brows furrowed in pleasure, and for a second he wished he had a portrait painted of you like this. He pushed another finger inside, his pace now relentless with his cock throbbing through his breeches, and with his free hand he grasped the front of your dress, tearing the fabric to expose your full breasts.

“Stopped putting up a fight now, kitten? But this is not a treat, this is a punishment” He said as he curled both his fingers inside you once again before completely withdrawing from your wet cunt. He lifted the fingers that were on you seconds ago and looked at them, making a disapproving sound with his tongue “Just look at that, look at the mess you made on my fingers, huh?”

He tapped at your lower lip with his wet fingers, the smell of yourself arousing you even more “Now be a good girl and open up” And you did as he said. You closed your lips around his fingers as you felt them press at your tongue and moaned as you tasted yourself “Clean them”

You ignored the smug smirk on his lips, knowing he was enjoying bossing you around more than anything, and hollowed your cheeks sucking on his calloused digits. Now it was his turn to let out a pleased groan and when you looked at his eyes his pupils were blown, his irises darker, what almost made you moan on his fingers again.

“I’ve heard you back there by the weirwood tree, your cunt of a father wants to sell you to that old Frey?” Benjicot retreated his fingers from your mouth and ran them down your chin, your saliva running through your skin as he slowly traced a way through your neck and collarbones until he reached one of your breasts, both his digits circling your already pointy nipple as he watched your velvety skin under his touch, his smirk had gone away from his face “That old dog deserves not even a piece of you”

You felt your heart skip a beat with his words, trying not to conclude anything for he had not confirmed yet “But soon enough he won’t be a problem, don’t worry kitten” He twisted your nipple between his index and thumb, trying to calm down his anger with the thought of Forrester Frey being anywhere near you, before you asked “How?”

“Because after I finish with your punishment, no man will take you as their wife” He pinched your nipple and you moaned again, the threat mixed with his ministrations and the dark expression in his face being almost too much.

The Blackwood lord moved his other hand to the laces of his breeches, undoing them while still stimulating your breast, and your breath hitched on your throat as you looked down, fixed on his slender fingers dealing with the strings, seeing as it became loose around his hips before he had to let go of your breast to get rid of the fabric that covered his lower part.

As he took off his breeches he came back to his position between your legs, your thighs on top of his, and his smirk placed itself back on his face as he watched your eyes widen with the sight of his bare hard cock.

“You’re- this is-, you are so big” You let out, shock and want on your face as he pushed your dress up, revealing your glistening cunt to him “I know, kitten, but do not worry, it will fit” You lifted your gaze from his hips to his eyes, finding him already staring back at you, and all you could think was that you wanted him more than anything in the world.

He placed both hands on your hips, bringing you closer, and grabbed him in his hand to slide through your folds, collecting as much of your juices as he could. He wanted you, desperately, he wanted to completely fill you with his length and fuck you mercilessly until all he heard was your screams of pleasure, he wanted to ruin you to any other man and to have only you for the rest of his fucking life.

And so, with the promise of punishing you in his head, he shoved his cock all the way inside you in one thrust, leaving you gasping, your mouth opened and your eyes closed, the stretch and pain of your first time almost bringing you to tears. He had never experienced something like this before – as his previous experiences had been with whores – and didn’t even dare to move, your cunt gripping him so tightly he thought that if he moved at that moment he would cum on the spot.

As he noticed your eyes closed, he pinched your nipple “Open your eyes, kitten, I want to look at your beautiful eyes” You sighed before opening them and when you did, he noticed the tears you tried not to spill. That made something snap inside him, breaking all the will he had to hurt and punish you, and he bended down to meet your face, his breath on your face and his eyes on your lips.

“As soon as I saw you there, next to the weirwood tree, all I wanted to do was to hurt you, make you regret stepping on Blackwood territory on that golden dress of yours, but it’s rather difficult to focus with that pretty face” One of his forearms was keeping him steady as his free hand came to your breasts, the feeling of your soft skin on his calloused fingers almost making him moan “Go on, tell me how you hate me, fight me, tell me how you are disgusted by me, so I can focus on punishing you”

A moan. You opened your mouth to say something, anything, but all you could do was moan and it went straight to his cock, throbbing inside your warm and tight walls, still not moving. As he glanced up, he met your teary eyes and opened mouth in an erotic portrait, he growled as he let go of the rest of his resistance and crashed his lips against yours in a desperate kiss. As your mouth was already agape when he did it, his tongue easily slipped inside and found yours, and you reached for the back of his head, your fingers curling on his black hair.

As he kissed you hungrily, he started moving, his cock almost leaving you entirely before pushing himself back inside, and the sensation of being full of him was so good that you could not control your moans. As he felt the vibrations coming from your mouth, Benjicot squeezed your breast hard and you were sure that would leave a mark – but you couldn’t care less.

As his pace grew a little faster, the pure pleasure replacing the pain of the stretch each time his hips met yours, he let go of your lips, glaring at your face with the squirms and sighs you let out. Even if his dreams were vivid, nothing would compare to having you like this – a mess of fabric, hair and red bruised lips – at the moment, the feeling of your walls always so tight around him and your soft skin on his hand made him grunt.

Your eyes went to his on that exact moment and you could swear that your walls squeezed around him at the sound. He placed his face on the crook of your neck as he started biting and placing kisses to the skin as a way to mark you, and started going down through your collarbone to the front of your chest before placing his lips to the nipple that wasn’t being stimulated.

The wet noises of skin slapping against skin and the feeling of both your nipples being teased made your eyes roll back in pleasure and now you didn’t even try to muffle your sounds anymore “Such a noisy kitten, taking me so well” He praised, lifting his head from your chest, and held your hips with both his hands, so strong that you now worried that you’d get bruises all over your body “You should be mine and not that Frey cunt”

With his firm grip on your hips, he pressed deeper into you, your back arching from the ground and trying to keep up with his movements “Please... Benji” Two of the only three words that you could pronounce at the moment – the third one being more – too caught up with pleasure to form a coherent phrase, and Benji laughed at that, full of pride for making the so beautiful and correct daughter of Amos Bracken look like a common whore “Do you want to be mine, kitten? Mine to fuck and use as I please?”

His words aroused you even more, his hoarse voice sending waves of heat straight to your cunt, and you tried to nod your head in affirmation, because that seemed like the only thing you could do at the moment “Use your words, kitten, I know you can do it” He moved one of his hands so he could brush past your clit and that made you gasp.

“Y-yes please, I want you, I want you Benji” As she nearly screamed, the man felt satisfied, his hunger for you only getting bigger with the way you moved your hips in time with his, your face making the most erotic expressions as your moans and repeated words sounded like an exclusive prayer for him.

“I’m going to fuck a baby in you, fill you with my seed so much you’ll be leaking for days, so your bloody father won’t have an excuse but to marry you to me” He grunted in between his words, moving faster and deeper as he assaulted your clit, and you started feeling a knot form inside of you, the pleasure becoming almost too much “Please, please” You didn’t even know what you were begging for, but only wanting this to never end.

“Yeah? Do you want to be my wife? To have your Bracken womb filled with Blackwood children? Your cunt to be used by a Blackwood cock? Is that what you want?” He leaned in, one of his hand still giving you pleasure, his head once again going to the crook of your neck as he grasped at your thigh, squeezing the flesh as he moved you so you could wrap your leg around his waist, and he heard you when you weakly repeated “Yesyesyes”

“So I’ll make sure you get until the last drop of my seed to, soon enough, you be swelling with my babe” He whispered into your ear as he pressed further to your clit and his pace soon enough was so fast you thought he would break you. Your moans got louder as you wrapped both your legs around his waist, the knot on your lower abdomen about to snap, and he looked at you before whispering “Go on, cum for me, kitten”

And that’s when it happened. The knot snapped within you as you flooded with pleasure, your whole body spasming as your walls grew impossibly tighter around him, milking him, and with just a few more thrusts he shoved himself as deep as he could inside you before he shot his load straight to your core, coating your womb. As he started coming down from his high, he captured your lips in a sloppy kiss and let most of his weight on top of you, which you didn’t care as his warmth and his skin on yours was all you wanted at the moment.

You let out a dissatisfied grunt as he removed his softening cock from your cunt, some of his seed spilling from you, and lied to your side, pulling you to his embrace “Did you really mean it? Marrying me?”

“Yes” You said, the warmth spreading across your face “Well, you filled me with your seed and the possibility of me getting pregnant is almost certain now. Marrying you is the right thing to do” You tried to be cautious with your words, but for the love of the Gods, he had just fucked you in the middle of the woods, caution was one thing you had abandoned long ago “Okay, I admit that since I first saw you in the assize I haven’t been able to remove you from my thoughts and I dreaded the day that the news of your possible engagement would come.”

You took a breath before finishing “We have nothing to do with each other, our families fucking hate one another, but every time I got inside Riverrun fortress, I hoped you’d be there” You said, absently moving your fingers through the skin of his chest, but did not dare to meet his gaze, for you were now as embarrassed as you could be.

“I am glad to hear that, for I have almost the exact same feelings as you. I ached for being able to get closer to you at the assize and to kiss you when I saw you standing next to the boundary. I almost went to Kermit Tully to ask him to propose a betrothal between us” He answered, his hand on the back of your head caressing through your hair. You lifted your head from his chest, his words making your heart flutter, and he leaned his head to capture your lips in a soft kiss, both your and his feelings pouring down into each other.

“But I must stop you from going straight to my father, for he would kill you before you would be able to ask to see him” One of your hands went to his cheek as you parted to breathe, only now noticing you left nail marks there, and stroke his skin.

“Oh, I do know that, for I would never take you back to Stone Hedge with your dress like this” He laughed when he saw your eyes widen at his words, remembering now of the tore skirt and bust of your dress, and quickly added “I’ll give you my cloak and we’ll go to Raventree Hall for you to change, after that we’ll go straight to Riverrun and ask Lord Tully to bless our union, for your father would never go against an order of his Lord Paramount”

“That sounds like a solid plan, not that bad for a Blackwood” You teased and he smirked “And you were not that bad for a Bracken” You gasped in false shock at his words, lightly slapping his shoulder, and he laughed “It will surely be good to have you as my wife, a good way to keep things interesting”

“I hope so, you Blackwoods are not usually that fun though” You bit your lower lip as you’d seen him arch his brows “Well, it depends on what fun you’re talking about, because at least in one kind of ‘fun’ I exceed expectations and you just proved it right”

"Shut up!" You exclaimed and he turned you again before kissing you.

“Don’t need to ask twice, my lady” He said and you kissed him again.

It could have not been the way you expected it to go, but one thing you could say: the Gods did grant you a way to free yourself from a marriage with someone twice your age, still uniting two people together, in hopes of a prosperous – and maybe more peaceful – future ahead.

So that's it! As I wrote it mainly for the smut part (oh god, what a good first impression) the plot part may be a little off, I'm sorry. Please, feel free to leave a note if you guys liked it and maybe soon I post another, a series this time.

[aguacatetoast]

Cowboy

Female Reader x Portgas D Ace

Warnings: minors DNI! 18+, possessiveness, unprotected sex, a bit of sub Ace, oral female receiving, praising, teasing, riding, and probably more pls lmk!

Word count:2,548

(Likes and reposts are greatly appreciated!<3)

You decide to go out with your girls to the club when you see Ace the guy you had a fling with starts being possessive and sets his hat on your head. You know the cowboy hat rule.

yes this is inspired by the ace edit by @ mr.sanjivk on tiktok!

It was a Saturday night and you and your girls, Nami and Robin, had been pregaming and getting ready together on the thousand sunny. The plan was to go to a club at the next island you stopped at, which you guys were approaching rather quickly according to your navigator. "Girls! We're almost at the island, are you guys ready?" asked Nami. Robin said a soft 'yes'. "I'm almost ready, just need to put on my heels," you said. Nami as always started stressing out "Come on y/n hurry up! I heard in this town there's a drinking competition and I want my berries" she yelled out as she left the room. As soon as she did you could hear the chef swoon over her and loudly compliment her.

Robin let out a soft laugh and said "Y/n I'll meet you outside, I'll calm our navigator down." You gave her a soft smile of acknowledgement as she left the room and you finished putting on your heels. You went to a mirror to check yourself out and you were satisfied with the way you looked so you made your way outside. You were the last victim of the cook as he had been waiting for you to come out, thankfully as soon as you got onto the deck, you arrived on the island. "Took you long enough, let's go," said nami, you said quick goodbyes to everyone that was on the deck and made your way to the island.

The club was crowded and sweaty as expected, Nami went off to her competition, and Robin went to a mysterious corner to read her book, and that left you in the middle of the dance floor, with sweaty bodies all around you. It wasn't your idea for the night, but you made the most out of it (with the help of a couple of rounds of tequila shots in your system.) You had fully unwinded and danced with anyone that was around. You noticed a muscular man had taken interest in you as he kept on glaring at you and would dance extremely close to you touching your curves. Normally you would've pushed him off in 0.2 seconds, but it had been a while since you had gone clubbing and you were touch-deprived. So you simply didn't care as you were grinding onto his attractive body. You were in your own world dancing with this strange man when suddenly you felt a hat plop on your head. You started to look around and see who would do such a thing when you noticed a certain athletic man with familiar dark raven hair.

You instantly lose interest in the random guy you were dancing with and head towards Ace. Your heart was racing, and you saw he was missing his hat, which could only mean… "Hey beautiful," Ace said with a smirk as he leaned down close to your ear, "Like your hat" You look at him with an annoyed face and rolled your eyes "Hey Ace, what's up and what's with the hat?" you say trying to take the hat off, he let out a cocky chuckle and put his big hand over yours and pushed the hat back down, "I'm just claiming what's mine, that's all" You were taken aback by his actions, sure you and he had a fling, and it was more than a fling to you but he never seemed to have taken it as serious as you did. After things ended with him you thought of him every single day, he always crossed your mind. But you had to move on because you knew he didn't feel the same way, although he never said it. You also ended up joining his younger brother's crew, it was inevitable.

"Excuse me? What makes you think I'm yours, last time I checked I was never your girlfriend" you told Ace with an ache in your heart. His expression changed, and his eyes softened with sadness to them. "I'm sorry I never made you my girlfriend y/n… I was a dumbass and didn't feel like I deserved you" You just gave him a disappointed look when he said "Can I get another chance? I promise this time will be different…I really miss you" Now you don't know whether it was the alcohol or his puppy eyes pleading with you to give him another chance but you said yes. His eyes lit up and he smiled brightly "Thank you y/n I promise to treat you like a queen" he said as he brought you into a tight hug, as he rested his head on top of yours. You lightly punched his arm saying "Yeah you better…idiot" He laughed enjoying your presence and jokes that he missed so much.

Ace danced with you the entire night, keeping his warm hands tight around your waist and occasionally traveling down your ass. You had a tight grip on his buff shoulders and biceps, enjoying every inch of him not wanting the night to end. He stopped dancing for a moment which made you stop and just look at him, you two were making intense eye contact in this crowded room but in your mind, it was just the two of you. The eye contact was making your heart race again until he leaned down to kiss you, giving you the most desperate passionate kiss you've ever had, as he let go he whispered in your "You don't know how much I missed you" you smiled, happy that he missed you that much but you wanted to tease him "Show me how much you missed me" you stated close up in his ear with a sensual tone. He pulled back to face you with a shocked face and then a smirk "Are you sure you want to know?" you gave him an arrogant smile "Dying to know."

He ended up dragging you out of that club, you saw Robin on your way out as you waved goodbye to her. Ace was holding your hand so tight and almost sprinting out of there you didn't even get to see Robin's face. You and Ace managed to escape the club and made your way to his ship and then raced to his room. "y/n you don't know how long I've been waiting for this" You felt your cheeks go warm at his sincerity "I also missed you a lot Ace… thought about you every day…." you admitted to him. You see him get flustered and see his freckled cheeks go red, he kisses you again but this time with hunger. He starts off with slow passionate kisses and suddenly bites your bottom lip gently, you then feel him slip his hot tongue and you allow him access to your mouth. You missed the way he tastes, no matter what Ace always tasted the same and god did you miss it. Meanwhile, he's grabbing your ass making you grind on him and you let out a soft moan as you felt how hard he was through his shorts. He lets out a groan "Fuck I missed your beautiful noises" You smiled softly "Yeah? What else did you miss about me…"

His eyes were full of lust, different from before "Let me show you…please" he says begging. You give a small nod and he moves you towards his bed, you feel comfortable in this familiar space, it feels almost natural being there on his bed as Ace takes off your heels and lifts up your dress. He manages to get it off quickly and admires your figure in your matching lace bra and underwear. You had planned on getting some action tonight, just not with Ace (but you were glad it was him) Ace was looking at you as if you were his prey and he was the predator, you felt flustered under his intense gazing when he interrupted your thoughts "Fuck…baby you're so beautiful" his hand grazing your thighs as you laid down on his bed, back against his bed frame. You felt a fluttering when he slid your panties down, his eyes staying put on your core admiring every single second. It had been a while since you had gotten any action, you were extremely lustful and sensitive.

You let out a small gasp when he immediately digs in and licks you up from the bottom of your pussy to your clit. Ace is fully focused on your intoxicating taste, savoring every second he teases your clit and feeling as you twitch under his strong grip. You were so sensitive and turned on that if he kept on licking at your bundle of nerves you were surely going to cum right then and there. Your legs were twitching uncontrollably as you moaned, not caring how loud you were because he just made you feel so good. "F-fuck Ace if you keep on going…" Before you could finish your sentence he took his head out "Sorry princess, not yet" he said with a stupid smile "Want you to cum on my cock" he leaned in to kiss you, tasting yourself in the kiss. You were disappointed, especially knowing how close you were but you were immediately relieved by the feeling of his dripping tip rubbing along your clit and then down to your slit. "You're so pretty, baby… I can't wait to feel you" As he finished that sentence he thrusted full force into you. You moaned loudly digging your nails onto his back as he hovered over you, length fully in you.

He hissed at how tight you were "Damn sweetheart, real tight for me.." you couldn't even speak with how full you felt, he started thrusting into you slowly, your nails digging deeper. The room was full of explicit noises, your skin slapping, moans from the both of you, your wetness. While Ace fucks you, he maintains eye contact not wanting to miss your pretty face as you moaned, and making sure his hat was still placed on your head. He puts one of his thumbs in your mouth making you suck it and letting out a small good girl. He uses that thumb to rub on your clit, as he starts thrusting into you even faster "No one has ever fucked you as good as me huh baby" you moaned at the combination of sensations, your cunt being destroyed feeling the bulge in your lower stomach, and now your clit being perfectly played with as he ran circle over it, you weren't able to answer him. He makes you look at him by taking his hand away from your clit and pulling the string of his hat that was under your chin to turn your head over to where he was, making you guys meet eye to eye. "Answer me, baby, no one has ever made you feel as good as me hm?" he said in an assertive tone, as you gained a bit of awareness and shook your head yes, his thumb went back to your clit as he said "Use your words babe" You were cock drunk but managed to say "Only you make me feel so good…Ace"

He started pounding into your pussy, making you feel so full but you couldn't stop moaning and gasping, you were to think he was going to split you in half. Your legs were extremely wide open as he was pounding on you and running circles onto your clit your legs were numb at this point. The heat in your belly started blazing and you knew you were close "Ace.. I'm c-close" he starts sucking on your nipples as your boobs had spilled out of your bra and he whispered in your ear "Cum on my cock beautiful" That was your last straw. The heat in your stomach poured out of you as he took this as an opportunity to thrust even faster. You were overstimulated and tears started to flow, but he made you feel so good. Your moans were so loud if anyone was on that ship they would think Ace was torturing someone. But before you were officially done he flipped you on top of him and now he was under you.

You were distraught as you were still recovering from what just happened, with a lustful look on his face he says "Since you're wearing my hat, I think it's only right if you ride me like a true cowgirl" you scoffed but decided to do as he said. You open your legs in between him and pop in his cock back sighing at how he felt at this angle. He laid down with a smug face watching as you jumped up and down on his cock. "You take me so well sweetheart," he said and moaned right after once you started going at a faster rate. You can feel his now burning palms grip your waist moving you up and down even faster. Your pussy gripped onto him making him moan "Mm-hm I'm gonna cum" and you felt his hot liquid shooting up inside you. You moaned softly as you felt his seed inside you and spill out of you as you sat on top of him. He moved you next to him now.

He went to the bathroom cleaned himself up a bit and went with a warm towel and he cleaned up the mess he made in you. You stared at him mind racing with thoughts. You couldn't believe that this man cleaning you up gently was the same one that was railing you a couple of seconds ago. Ace catches you staring and gives you one of his big smiles, with a sweaty face and rosy freckled cheeks. You can't help but smile at him, he sets down the towel somewhere as he goes to lie down with you. Somehow after all of that, you were still wearing his hat which he seemed to appreciate. "I guess you didn't miss me much huh Ace" you said with a giggle as he brought you under the covers to cuddle him. He laughs with an almost bashful look on his face "I never slept with anyone else after you y/n, I knew no one could compare to you and how you make me feel…" He said looking at your eyes lovingly "Plus no other girl would look as good in my hat except for you." You laughed and gave him a quick kiss "Yeah I think I'm gonna keep it now it suits me much better" he smiled "How about I keep my hat and keep you by my side, that suits me best" as he reached to get his hat back you stopped him "One thing at a time ok… but yes I will be your girlfriend" He instantly pulled you into a kiss and hugged you tightly "Thank you, baby, I promise it will be nothing like last time" he squeezed you in reassurance. Your face was against his smooth chest as you confessed to him "Ace… I love you" You heard his heartbeat start racing as he ran a hand through your hair "I love you too y/n…" and then the two of you dozed off to sleep.

[sakumasmut]

Enstars x Reader NSFW Month Day 10

Himeru x Bunny!Fem!Reader

late again, but I promise it’s worth it. Lily when you see this, hope you enjoy (and maybe be inspired to write a continuation wink nudge)

tags/warnings: breeding, vaginal sex, mating cycles

ao3

The coming of spring meant several things. Sunny days, floral breezes, gardens and parks full of color, and an uptick in sneezing from the unfortunate souls with pollen allergies (poor Koga was wearing a mask every time you saw him). For those with more primal instincts, the warmer weather meant it was the start of mating season. For the bunnies in Ensemble Square, it was time to either avoid contact with everyone and quarantine themselves, or get busy until all their cravings were satisfied.

You assumed heats were a necessary evolutionary trait thousands of years ago, but in the present day when your main source of stress was working an office job in a capitalist economy, your part-rabbit body throwing a hissy fit over not having a mate just made things even more stressful. The current situation you were in was a prime example of what problems the mating season could bring to the table, kneeling in front of a newer producer and comfortingly stroking their arm as they quivered in their seat.

“Stay here until the taxi arrives.” You spoke calmly to them. They were shaking and flushed red, not having expected to go into heat in the middle of work. “Once you get home, stay there until all the symptoms go away. Don’t worry about work; I’ll take care of it, m’kay?”

“Thank you, senpai.” They quietly sobbed, squeezing and rubbing their long ears to soothe themselves.

They were extremely lucky you happened to notice them hunched over in the hall and escorted them to a safe room before their vulnerable position attracted the wrong type of person. Mating season clouded people’s senses, you knew that too well. Married hybrids usually mated during March, to get it out of the way, but for single people, it was mostly just a waiting game until your body decided it craved a mate. You hadn’t gotten your heat yet, but you felt prepared to lock yourself in a room and call a taxi the moment you felt any sort of onset, to avoid ending up in the exact situation you were helping your coworker out of. For now though, you felt as fresh and (relatively) not horny as ever, and so said goodbye to the younger producer once their lift had arrived, escorting them to the car before rushing off to the meeting you were already late for.

“Sorry I’m late!” You quickly spoke as soon as you pushed the door open, the only person in the room looking up from the sound of your voice.

“Don’t worry, Himeru got your message.” The idol replied cooly, demeanor as nonchalant as ever. “The emergency situation you were dealing with, is it alright now?”

“Yes, yes, it’s all good.”

You were glad Himeru was an understanding person. It was a quality you liked about him, among other things. Maybe you were biased since you had worked with him for a few months on his solo jobs, but he always treated you kindly. You did notice he was harsher with his rowdy unit mates, but it only made you giggle more than anything, seeing him as the sort of person who gave as much respect as he received.

“If it’s not rude for Himeru to ask, what was it you were preoccupied with?”

“Ah, just some rabbit related stuff. You know how spring is for us.”

He frowned and knit his brows together as he looked you up and down.

“Producer, you aren’t feeling…ill, are you?” Himeru asked, “Himeru wouldn’t want you to be in a public place if you’re experiencing such symptoms.”

You flushed, realizing his misunderstanding. “No, ah, it’s not me! I was helping a younger rabbit who went into heat!” Being all red in the face and running into the room covered in sweat didn’t help with your case, as you could tell from his unchanging expression.

“Trust me, I would not be anywhere near here if my heat started! It usually starts pretty late in the spring, so I’m safe for a while.”

He nodded, expression relaxing at your assurances.

“It would certainly pose a large problem if it did. Though, if you ever find yourself in an unpleasant situation like that, Himeru would be glad to assist you in any way possible.”

“Huh?” You blinked at his words. What did he mean by that? Surely he meant that you could rely on him during emergencies, right?

“Now, shall we talk about your latest proposal?”

“Ah, yes!” You smacked yourself on the cheeks to rid yourself of those thoughts. “Here, I have the paperwork. Look over it and tell me what you think!”

xxx

You certainly weren’t lying when you said your heats came rather late into the season. People always complained about getting them early in March, but at least when they got them, afterwards they could go about their lives freely with no worries about getting sucker punched by their bodies. For you, spending a good two months worrying about the possibility that it’d come earlier was always a source of stress you had to push in the back of your mind, until finally it did come on a sunny May morning.

You woke up in a sweat, despite having taken a shower the previous night, and everything felt warm, way too warm. Funnily enough, you were meant to meet up with Himeru that afternoon, just as you did last month when you dealt with your coworker going into their own heat. You remembered what he had said about helping you if you ever found yourself in this situation, and thinking about the idol’s words made your horny mess of a brain wander to very obscene thoughts, which you had to smack yourself on the head to rid yourself of. No! You weren’t thinking clearly! You did struggle to understand what he meant, until you considered he likely referred to helping you with calling out of work and telling your clients you’d be unavailable. Having someone do all that for you rather than struggle with forming coherent sentences through a slog of calls sounded great right about now, and so you dialed him up once you managed to grab your phone. He picked up immediately after the first beep.

“Good morning, producer. Do you need Himeru for something?”

Just the sound of his alluring voice was making your body heat up. Stupid horny brain.

“Yeah, sorry this is sudden, but I need help with my heat.” You muttered, before realizing how it sounded without context and backtracking, “I meant—I need help with work, because I’m in heat! I need to tell my clients that I’ll have to reschedule, and you said that you could help, right?”

There was silence on the other end, and for a second you worried that maybe you had offended him somehow, before he responded with an “Understood, Himeru will inform everyone he needs to.”

You thanked him gratefully, and recited a list of people for him to message or call about your situation. That was a big weight off your shoulders, and now you could sink into bed and deal with your heat…all alone…

“Producer, can Himeru help in any other way? This time of year must be quite exhausting for your kind.”

Indecent thoughts of him came flooding back, of scenarios where Himeru could help you in ways your body needed the most…

“Perhaps you’d like him to bring you food and other supplies?”

“T-That’d be great, thanks.”

You hung up after giving him your address, and flopped yourself back onto the sheets, skin feeling sweaty and mind replaying how his voice sounded against your ear, wanting to hear it again after only a few seconds. The professional in you was already regretting saying yes to his offer, asking what kind of producer would invite an idol to their house in the middle of their heat, but the other part of you who saw him as a friend, perhaps a bit more, did really want the company. It would still be a while before he got here though, especially since he promised to do some of your work for you, and you wondered if your impatient body could even last until then.

A wave of desire washed over you, making you shudder. You tugged one of your long ears over your face, rubbing circles soothingly on the pink insides as your legs kicked your blanket off the bed. Your body was way too hot, yet no amount of ice would cool it off, only another person’s own heat enveloping your own would make it go away. You began to grind your hips against your pillow, whining into it, trying to pretend it was another person’s body—specifically a certain blue-haired idol. If you shut your eyes, maybe you could pretend he was already here in your house, comforting you with his presence.

You wondered how it would feel grinding against his thigh, imagining his yellow eyes watching you with immense interest. Yes, you could envision it so well in the blank space of your hormone filled brain. His hands would rest on your hips, holding you in place so you couldn’t climb off as you bucked against his leg. He’d see the wet mess pooling from your crotch area, dripping onto his pants, but rather than chastise he’d praise you, encouraging you to keep humping his leg until you came all over him.

You whined to yourself, the friction between your thighs and the pillow only making you feel a dull ache. You kept trying to chase an orgasm, anything to make your tensed up body feel better, but with only air for your cunt to clench around, you couldn’t bring yourself to. The buzz of the doorbell snapped you out of your daydream. How many minutes had passed? Were you so immersed in the scenario in your head that time had flown without you realizing, or was Himeru just that fast in getting to you? Your legs were shaky as you stood up, each step making your body wobble forward. You doubted you’d be able to leave the bed if you fell back onto it. You opened the door, and as expected Himeru was there, holding a plastic grocery bag.

“Good morning, producer.” His eyes scanned your form, and you did your best to stand upright without shaking. “Are you feeling alright?”

“I-I’m fine. Come on in.”

You tried to look composed as he entered, trying to keep your ears upright and hoping that he couldn’t sense the pheromones your body was releasing. If he could, he didn’t give any indication, expression as blank as ever while he placed the bag on your kitchen counter.

“Himeru admits, he doesn’t know much about your situation. But he tried to get things that could help.”

He took out some snacks and drinks, ones that you immediately recognized as your go-tos in the break area of the ES building. You smiled softly, touched that he would remember your preferred foods.

“Thank you. This means a lot.”

“It’s not a problem. Is there anything else Himeru can do for you while he’s here?”

He kept asking that same question, if he could do anything for you, and the short answer was that he could. But you were too scared to make the first move, in case he actually wasn’t interested in going further than your relationship as an idol and producer. Surely he’d cut ties with you if he didn’t mean it that way, and not seeing him again would hurt more than the rejection. Your body heated up again, as if begging you to voice your desires. You had to bite your lip to stop yourself from audibly whimpering, something Himeru noticed.

“You look quite feverish, perhaps you should go back to your bed to rest?”

“Y-Yeah, maybe I should. Let me just put these away first…”

You took a step towards the counter to take some of the food away, but immediately stumbled. You braced yourself for the impact, but Himeru’s hands moved quickly to catch you. One hand grabbed your shoulder while the other circled around your stomach, pulling you up against his chest. A moan couldn’t help but come out of you at the warmth of his touch, cutting through the sexual tension like a knife. You froze up when you realized what you did, the silence following making you almost certain he heard it.

“S-Sorry, I’m just so…” You stammered, trying to come up with excuses. “out of it.”

His hands were still on you, the mere contact making you want to collapse into his chest. You really didn’t want him to let go, you wanted to imagine his arms wrapped around you forever, so you wondered when you were going to be hit with reality and have his arms release their hold, expecting him to excuse himself and leave you to deal with your heat alone again. Except, they didn’t. They stayed on your body, and you swore he even pulled you closer.

“Meru?”

“…Forgive Himeru for being unprofessional, but I can’t bear to leave you in this state.”

You looked up at him in surprise, only now noticing how hungry his gaze was as his eye bore directly into you. He moved the arm that was around your waist underneath your legs to scoop you up into a bridal carry. All the snacks went ignored as he brought you into your bedroom, having decided to have a taste of something else. You squealed as he dropped you onto the mattress. You would be embarrassed by how messy your bed was if your heart wasn’t beating out of your chest from the sight of Himeru leaning over you, face so close to yours you could hear his breathing. You truly felt like prey, his prey.

“If you want me to leave, tell me so now.”

His voice was husky, looking at you with a deadly serious expression that made shivers run down your spine. His presence was intoxicating, you couldn’t let him leave now. You needed him here, with you, to satisfy you. You kept your lips shut as you stared straight at him, and your arms uncrossed themselves from above your chest to rest on either side of your body.

“Stay. Please.”

His expression softened at your resolution, and he reached a hand out to stroke your long ears gently, gliding his fingers upwards along the fur. You whimpered, thighs squeezing together. Himeru noticed, and gently placed a hand on one knee to pry your legs apart. A wet spot on your crotch area gave away your arousal, and he hummed.

“Poor girl. May I take these off?”

You nodded, and he carefully pulled your pajama bottoms off, exposing your soaked pussy. He pressed a finger against one of your swollen lips, already glistening with your juices. You trembled as he brought it to his mouth, making eye contact with you as he licked it clean.

“So wet already…your body must not want to waste any time.”

He didn’t either, as his gaze momentarily left your body to focus on the buttons of his pants. Seeing the tent that had formed in the short time it took to bring you here filled you with a sense of satisfaction, eased that he was enjoying this as much as you were. Once you saw his erection pop out from his boxers, your body seemed to clench even tighter in anticipation, unable to resist the idea of having it stuffed inside you. Your instincts told you to get onto all fours, knees spread wide to present yourself to your mate, and Himeru cooed at your eagerness.

“Good girl. Such a good bunny for me.”

His words went straight to your cunt, feeling it throb even before his dick was anywhere near it. Being reduced to the bunny in heat you were, his bunny, just felt right. You weren’t a producer right now, you were a helpless rabbit that was begging to be bred. He parted your folds with two fingers, coating them with your slick and rubbing it on his length, lubing it up as you squirmed impatiently, your tail’s movements giving away your excitement.

“Tell me what you want.”

“I-I…”

Even now, when you were so close to what your body craved, your lips refused to move. He leaned in close to your ear, close enough that you felt them brush against it when he spoke.

“Do you want me to mount you?”

Fuck.

You whined, babbling affirmative noises as he chuckled at how his words left you quivering in anticipation, lifting your rear high into the air to ask him to take you already. The warm feeling of something pressing against your entrance followed. He pushed himself in slowly, much too easily with how wet you were. Every nerve in your body was focused on the feeling of his length sinking completely into your wet cunt, all the way to the hilt, before slipping back out. Even in your wildest wet dreams you never thought he would be making you feel so full, so complete.

The noises you made were all quiet, either cut short by them catching in your throat or muffled by the pillow you were burying your face into. If he were going any faster, surely the squelch between your union would make a wonderful sound, but at his current pace the only sound in the room was his breathing and your muffled whining.

Himeru’s hands kept your hips steady as he pushed in and out of you, each thrust making the butterflies in your stomach flutter. Being filled by him just felt so right. This was what you were craving, cock stuffed inside you, body weight pressed down to make sure you couldn’t escape. Yet despite how your body trembled, how your legs were spread so wide for him, Himeru was still taking it slow, trying to make sure he wasn’t pushing you too much. It was still relieving your desire, but the slow jolts of pleasure weren’t enough, you needed something more primal to satiate yourself.

“What’s wrong?” He hummed, rocking his hips back and forth, “Is Himeru’s little bunny still needy?”

“Hah~ Meru…” You whined. “Faster, please, I want to feel you deep inside me~”

Who was he to deny you when you sounded so desperate underneath him? He pulled his cock out almost entirely before sinking balls deep inside you, making sure to do it harshly enough that your toes curled when he did. A louder whine escaped you, and it found itself joined by more as he slammed himself into you over and over again. Your short tail brushed against the skin of his stomach, flicking back and forth with each thrust. He reached out to take it in his hand, and you mewled when he lifted it up.

“So you’re sensitive here.” He hummed, gently stroking the white under-fur with his thumb.

“A-Ah, w-wait, mmh~”

Your eyes nearly rolled back in your head, knees wanting to give in from his touch, but he made you keep your hips upright, your back falling to a downwards slant as your arms gave in. You cried out when the first orgasm of your heat finally came, and through it all he just kept fucking you into the mattress, his own grunts of effort filling the air as he focused on the feeling of your warm walls trying to milk his cock.

“Bunny, you’re so tight.” He grunted. “You’re going to make me finish, too.”

“Inside, do it inside!” You whined, pushing your hips back towards him. Being in heat meant you were the most fertile you could’ve ever been; if he came inside you, surely it’d end with carrying his litter. But instead of being terrified of the idea, in the haze of your heat you wanted nothing more than for him to fill you up with his kids, as many as he wanted. He seemed to hesitate, noticeably slowing down.

“I-Himeru shouldn’t do that.”

“Hah, Meru, please!” There were nearly tears in your eyes as you turned to look back at him, pleading. “Breed me, knock me up, just give me everything!”

Your voice was so desperate, your body so eager to take his seed, to become his breeding bunny…he couldn’t help himself, his movements becoming more erratic as he growled out your name. He didn’t seem like he was going to pull out anymore, that was sure.

You mewled as his cock continuously pressed against the entrance to your womb, as if trying to coax it to open a bit further for the oncoming delivery. You chanted his name, the only noise reaching your ears your pitiful “Meru”s until he finally let out a loud groan, eyes shutting tight as he came inside you. The warmth flooding into you made your body and brain equally fuzzy, leaving you unable to think as you both came down from your highs.

“Did that satisfy you, bunny?” Himeru murmured against your ear, lips brushing over them and almost kissing them. He was still inside you, and you were sure he could feel how you clenched tightly around his cock at his words, wanting to feel it grow hard again.

“My my, seems like it didn’t.” He tisked, lifting your hips up high and forcing your shaky knees to support the weight of his hips pressed flush against your ass with a half-hearted whine. “You’re making me work overtime, producer. So all I ask is that you reward Himeru appropriately.”

If the reward he wanted was to make you swell with kids, well, it was practically already fulfilled. After all, he wasn’t going to leave his bunny alone after only one load, was he?

[folkookie97]

❝ twisted in bedsheets ❞ — jjk

— PAIRING: ex boyfriend!jungkook x female!reader

— SUMMARY: ❝ An affair with your ex who's your children's dad isn't a good idea. Especially when he's about to get married. ❞

— TYPE: angst | non-idol!au

— WORD COUNT: 2,617

— WARNINGS: Past/Secret relationship, Cheating, Coparenting, Husband!Taehyung, Jungkook has a fiancée, Mention of (2) Unplanned Pregnancy, Slight Toxic!relationship, Curses, Sad/Open(?) ending, Inspired by August & Illicit Affairs (Taylor Swift), Mention of brother!Namjoon, Mention of Marriage Convenience, Argument

— NOTES: i hope u like it <3 happy birthday to our bunny

— RELEASE DATE: September 01, 2023

— CROSSPOSTING: ao3

Forgiveness is inevitable for our individual evolution. It's necessary in any religion or even in psychology, which emphasizes the importance of that attitude and feeling so that we can have a better life.

Could that be the reason why things were so complicated?

Your brother used to say that you had extreme difficulty in overcoming certain situations, especially when people harmed you. It was as if you didn't care about their remorse. Even when years passed it was like you focused on the pain felt by your past self and refused to forget what they'd done.

Whenever Namjoon said that you would roll your eyes and vehemently deny it. Not only due to the discomfort of acknowledging a possible red flag but also because you didn't see yourself that way.

At least until that day.

"I'm seeing you received his wedding invitation." You felt a kiss on your face as Taehyung entered the living room accompanied by your two children, who didn't waste any time jumping onto your lap and showering you with hugs.

With your head still slightly sore, you returned the affection and watched the two kids running towards their bedrooms.

"How did you know he was engaged?"

The sigh that escaped Taehyung's lips increased your irritation. You made an effort to not rush him as you continued analyzing the expressions on his face. You noticed everything from the subtle bite he gave to his upper lip to the furrowing of his brows.

"He mentioned it to me."

You definitely didn't expect that. Anything was possible except for that.

What the hell was going on?

"Wow, amazing! You and Jungkook become fucking friends again?" You screamed and laughed sarcastically at the same time. "How'd it happen?"

Taehyung trembled at your voice's volume. He never saw you so stressed before. Yelling at him wasn't your style. Like never.

"My darling..." He attempted, sitting beside you and trying to get closer. Despite knowing the reason for your anger, Taehyung wasn't ready for the blow to his heart as he saw you move your body further into the sofa's corner. Away from him. "(Y/N), stop it…"

"Tell me that shit right now or I swear I'll sleep somewhere else tonight."

You didn't want your words to sound so offensive. You were even trying hard.

However, Taehyung knew you well. He knew you all too well. You couldn't fault him for being such an amazing husband.

You changed the question when the silence hung too long, "Why'd you keep this from me?"

“I was afraid you'd wanna be in his bride's shoes."

At that moment you knew Taehyung was correct even with such selfishness.

You really wanted to be in Jihyo's shoes.

You wanted to be Jeon Jungkook's future wife.

After so many years. You still wanted him back.

Resentment. Anger. Jealousy. Envy. Sadness.

Those were the feelings that took over your heart when Jungkook's messages showed up on your phone screen.

"Can you meet me at the snack bar near your house in half an hour? It's about my wedding. Take the twins if you can."

You rolled your eyes with an urge to send him to hell fucking strong.

So it was hard to believe that you were really fighting the intrusive thoughts and getting the twins ready for the meet.

Ivy wore a pink dress detailed with sunflowers and yellow shoes. The little hair bow was the same color as the flowers and contrasted with the dark tone of her hair strands.

Dressing Oliver was always a hard situation so you chose didn't stress yourself more than usual. You gave way to the little boy's desire to wear a simple Spider-Man costume and Iron Man flip flops.

You looked around for Jungkook when you arrived at the snack bar but couldn't find him anywhere. Rolling your eyes and biting your lip to push away the anger starting creeping into your veins, you decided to sit with the kids at a table farther away and near the large window.

The bell on the entrance door rang once again after you ordered a portion of French fries and hurried footsteps ran towards the three of you.

"Did you already order without me?"

Tears were already welling up in the corners of your eyes before you could muster efforts to contain the pain in your heart. The warmth of the liquid reminds you how pathetic you'd seem if you cried in front of him.

You couldn't show weakness.

"Hey, Jungkook. I see you're late... As usual." You commented and saw your children leave their seats to hug his waist and hug him. That damn tiny waist.

"Don't be so mean, my angel. You know I'd never be late on purpose."

His sarcastic smile caused a frown on your face. He was such an arrogant bitch.

Jungkook whispered something to Ivy and Oliver, who nodded with their little heads and hurried to the snack bar background where you knew there were some small tables with blank sheets of paper and colored pencils to draw with.

The owners of that place understood how great it was having a space to entertain customers' children. No one liked seeing kids witnessing adult arguments.

"Why'd you ask me to bring them if you just sent them to drawing?"

"I just miss my children, (Y/N). They're mine too, you forget?"

He didn't say it with a rude tone but a guilt feeling hit you instantly. Even though you knew he wasn't blaming you for those trip days, you were aware that Jungkook would miss the twins a lot and yet you refused to let them being at his house.

"How were the days in London? Business trips are usually quite tiring and I-" You cut off him when he sat across from you. Was he beating around the bush?

"What the hell, Jungkook? You call me here to talk about my work at my dad's company or talk about your fucking wedding?"

It was his turn to rolling eyes and wrinkling his nose while he noticed your impatience. You looked like a cartoon character with your flushed face, furrowed forehead and lips being bitten to avoid more shouting.

If he tried a bit harder certainly he'd glimpse flames coming out of your body. Really like a common facial expression in comics cartoons.

"Wow! Looks like you aren't happy for me."

"And how could I be?" You chuckled with a heavy dose of sarcasm. He couldn't be serious. He'd be cruel as hell. "Why are you marrying Jihyo?"

"Cuz I'm in love with her." Jungkook shrugged as if that were the most obvious answer in the whole world.

For the hundredth time since the wedding invitation papers landed in your hands, you rolled your eyes and felt the urge to grab him by the neck until he dropped dead.

"You didn't look so badly in love with her like that when you were eating me out before my trip just like a dumb needy virgin." You took the initiative to curl your lips into a mocking smile and Jungkook widened his eyes on your sharp words.

"Don't say that." He warned you with a sound coming out much rougher than you anticipated.

Instead of containing the venom dripping through your teeth, you continued the session of criticizing the character of the man in front of you.

"Actually, you didn't look to love her in any of so many nights we've fucking these last three years. But I think you loved moaning my name when I was creaming around your cock and also when you cumshot in my face. And maybe when-"

Your mind stopped processing any more humiliations when Jungkook punched the table and all the decorations placed there rattled, just like the instantaneous movement of your body.

It'd been a single punch. Very quick. But you couldn't help but feel scared in Jungkook's presence for the first time in all those years of going back and forth.

The silence between you two lasted for just three minutes although a discomfort in your chest felt like it hung there for almost an eternity. Slowly you looked at him; his trembling lips and eyebrows frowned. Almost like he was about to cry.

Anything about that sounded impossible to you. Jeon Jungkook never cried easily. Why was he so broken?

"Jihyo's pregnant…" The news came along with a few tears in the corners of his shining eyes.

You definitely weren't expecting this. He knew you weren't because whilst you were trying to come up with something to say Jungkook was faster and cut off anything you could think of.

"Taehyung found her a few days ago at the mall while he was there with Ivy and Oliver. She was buying baby clothes and he saw her briefly."

"It was the day he told me that you asked him to see the kids at your house before the agreed-upon time." You said more like thinking out loud. Jungkook nodded in agreement.

"He got really confused so he came to my house and wanted to confront me. I left the kids playing in their room and sat with him in the kitchen." Jungkook fiddled with his own hands studying the collection of tattoos on his skin with as much interest as he had when he got it. "I told him that I knew about it a few days before. Tell him about the wedding wasn't in my plans but he noticed my engagement ring."

There was so much to ask and so little courage to do it. Your mind was boiling with desperation and your heart felt shattered into pieces.

Goddamn fucking fate!

"How many weeks of pregnancy is she?" You allowed yourself to ask, not interested in more minutes of painful silence..

"Sixteen," Jungkook replied. Sixteen weeks! Four damn months! "It's a little girl. She'll be named Liz."

You clenched your teeth remembering the reason behind the choice of her name.

"Before our breakup you used to say your dream was having a daughter named Liz." You reminded him and he swallowed hard realizing that memory remained fresh in your mind even the years that passed.

"Yeah… But when you were pregnant it was you who chose the name Ivy, so I thought-" Jungkook stopped talking and widened his eyes noticing what he'd just said. "But I love our daughter's name! It's so beautiful!"

You almost wanna laugh remembering how upset he was when saw your pregnancy belly and found out that you hid the pregnancy from him. Annoyance for your secret turned to happiness after a few minutes of civil conversation. And it turned into shock when you told him it wasn't a common pregnancy but a twins pregnancy. He went back to being happy when you told him about the babies' genders and he went back to being upset when heard you say that you'd already decided the babies' names on your own.

And the little girl wasn't named Liz as he always dreamed.

“Well, you know… maybe if I'd chosen the name Liz instead of Ivy you might have changed your mind about us and our relationship."

It wasn't true. You loved your daughter's name and could never imagine it any other way. You were just hating the perks in Jihyo's life and the fake "perfect love" she swore existed between both of them.

"My angel… you know you were already engaged to Taehyung. He's… He was my best friend. I couldn't act that way. I couldn't go against your families' desire to see you two get married."

"It was just for the company's sake, Jungkook! Just for the reputation of Taehyung's family and mine!" You fumed and clenching fists before running the fingers through your head, where you tugged a few hair strands overly desperate.

"I don't give a fuck about that bullshit! It's because Taehyung loves you! HE ALWAYS LOVED YOU!"

If you and Jungkook weren't such frequent customers in that establishment, surely the owners of the place would tell you two to leave the instant Jungkook punched the table for the second time.

Though Ivy and Oliver remained quiet drawing in the other room, you knew your children well enough to know they were covering their ears when they both saw their dad so furious with you.

For that one reason you stared at Jungkook. Eye to eye. Tears to tears.

The resentment was high. However, it wasn't strong enough for your pride worthed more than your children's mental health. Jungkook looked like he shared the same thought and tried to normalize his breathing and clear his mind. He adjusted himself in the chair until his posture was more relaxed.

"Love you, my angel. I swear I love you with all my soul and I think that my love for you can never go away." Jungkook looked like he was about to break. "But it's not fair."

His voice came in trembling whispers and his eyes were teary as you've never seen it. "It's not fair to Taehyung, it's not fair to Jihyo, or our twins, or Liz. Much less to us. Me and you. We don't deserve to live like this."

Deep down, you knew it was true. And that hurt more than if you were lied to.

"So are we done again?"

You never really started over. Everything should've ended after the casual fuck when you found out your father wanted you and his business partner's son to get married.

Jungkook swore to himself that he was happy as a single man and you swore to yourself that Taehyung would be an excellent husband and dad, even if you didn't love him.

But then when Jungkook got back from his exchange in Canada everything snowballed. He found out about your pregnancy and the fact the child was the result of the drunken reunion you two had a few months after the breakup.

As if everything couldn't be more desperate, you were actually gonna marry his best friend the next quarter.

Taking on responsible fatherhood and coparenting was all he promised to you. The whole coexistence between you two should be only for the twins.

Of course it didn't go as planned. He was angry seeing you in a fake marriage with Taehyung, who still laid with you every night despite loving you with all his heart and not being reciprocated.

His self-control lasted just for three years until the desire to feel you again took over, and after Ivy and Oliver's third birthday party you two fucked for the first time since the night that reconnected your lives.

Jungkook knew you confessed the first cheating to your husband and he also knew that he could ask for a divorce. However, Taehyung loved you enough to remain a second option and only get out of your life if your true love asked you to come back.

But Jungkook never did it. Because of the fear of spoiling your life. Because of the fear of hurting Taehyung's heart. Because of the fear of being a bad example for your children.

The affair between you has never ceased during the last three years. Not even when he forced himself into a relationship with Jihyo to try getting over you.

He wasn't proud of it. Deep down, you weren't either.

And Jungkook couldn't allow himself to fail one more time.

"You were never mine to lose.“ It's the confirmation you needed. It was over. You and Jungkook were done.

On that August 31st you knew Jungkook was no longer the target of your anger. It was yourself.

And you would never forgive yourself for getting twisted in bedsheets of someone that were never yours.

[seakicker]

I’ve been writing for about ten years privately and publicly and across multiple different websites, fandoms, and eras of favorite characters. I first started writing fanfiction physically in notebooks I stashed under my bed since I didn’t own my own laptop until I was 18, lol. I had originally started writing as a means to cope with feeling like The Ugly Kid because I never had a serious relationship in my pre-teen and teenage years. I was always on the chubby side and, given fanfiction’s tendency to depict readers as extremely thin and physically much smaller than the character in question, I sought to make my own stuff that would, hopefully, alleviate some insecurities and give a place to people who felt similarly to me as a kid. Well, I also started writing because I was horny and hormonal and just wanted to fuck pixels, but that much goes without saying. 

I don’t think writing has much of a place in my current life for a variety of reasons and, despite what I said the other day, I don’t see it being a part of my future and I’m okay with that! It’s a hobby that has served me very, very well for nearly ten years (roughly half of my life now since I’m 22)— I’ve learned to like myself so much more than I ever thought I would have as a teenager, I’ve opened myself up to different ways to express myself and my sexuality, I’ve met a lot of really cool people, and I think I’ve been able to help other people out quite a bit, too. I always worry about coming off as overly pretentious or self-righteous when I talk about helping people through the power of porn fanfiction, but when I’ve received so many messages over the years about how I’ve helped other plus size people learn to feel a little more secure or how I’ve helped people feel less guilty about masturbating and enjoying sex, I think it’s a fair statement to make. I’ve had tons and tons and tons of good times as a writer, but I think reading these messages about helping other people are absolutely my favorite times to look back on. It makes me feel really good. 

I’m in a completely different stage of my life now compared to when I first started writing and I don’t think the hobby appeals to me much anymore. I do think the tumblr game of notes and numbers and interactions has stressed me out some, but it’s by no means my main motivation to hang up my hat and move on to a new era of my life. I don’t care about getting a bazillion notes or a million followers, I just like to be a slut online and help other people feel good about themselves in the process, but any person who makes content will be the first to tell you that it does hurt at least a little when you make something you’re insanely proud of and it gets an amount of likes/reblogs/kudos/comments/etc you find disproportionate to your follower count or subscriber count. Nevertheless, I try not to focus on numbers too much and, while I’m somewhat successful at that, I and many other writers and artists do feel that tumblr has a major problem with interaction, reblogs vs likes, and engagement and tumblr staff’s own decisions to introduce things like community labels certainly don’t help. 

As I said, numbers are not my main inspiration to quit. I’ve experienced near endless burnout since about January of this year where none of my ideas feel unique and original, none of them excite me, and nearly all of them make me worry that other people won’t enjoy them. It’s hard to want to write when you don’t feel like you’re making anything good, and, as I’m sure you all have noticed, I’ve taken a lot of breaks this year to hopefully get myself back in the swing of things, but I never return feeling refreshed and excited by new ideas, so that was the biggest indication to me that I’ve simply grown out of another hobby and I’m a changing person with changing interests and desires, and that’s okay! I’m emerging into a new stage of adulthood after graduating college and beginning to move out of my parents’ house, and so a shift in my hobbies and likes is to be expected. I had a conversation with another writing friend of mine who gave up writing publicly about six months ago, and my feelings sounded a lot like his, so that also suggested to me that I’m just ready to be done. 

I’m infinitely thankful to everyone who’s ever been a part of my writing journey, whether you reblogged a fic once or were a regular emoji anon who stopped in frequently. I really cherish the memories I’ve made and I was always insanely excited to see people claim new emojis, see regulars in my inbox talking to me, and read nice comments and messages. When I say that writing has been a pivotal part of my life for a decade now, I mean that in so many ways, especially in the way that it has brought so many cool and nice people to me. I’ve made mistakes and I’ve said and done things that hurt other people, and I’m grateful for the forgiveness and reconciliation others have given me just as I am thankful for all the people who have supported me throughout my online presence. 

I do feel guilty about leaving, but you guys deserve a proper goodbye instead of me putting my blog on hiatus again and just leaving it there to sit. I’d like to formally leave instead of just going dormant or disappearing, and this is that formal departure. I’ve had thoughts of quitting in the past, but those were when I was already feeling upset with other things in my life so I knew they weren’t real, but I’ve been thinking about this consistently for about four months now in clear mindsets and headspaces so I know it’s a little more real. I put myself on hiatus this last month to really think about it and, while it’s natural to go back and forth on such a decision and try to talk myself out of it, I really am ready and I don’t feel like I need to convince myself to stay when I’m not happy with my content. I owe you guys regularity and consistency, and I’ve failed to be a consistent writer or poster these past few months or so, and I’m sorry for that. I’ve talked about it a lot with my boyfriend and my close friends, and I feel it’s best for me to move on now and try some new things! I’m excited for this next stage of my life as I seek out a new career, look to move in with my boyfriend and get out of my parents’ place, and maybe get engaged too ☺️ 

My tumblr and AO3 will remain up with the same usernames and whatnot. I can’t even thank you guys enough for everything you’ve given me in the past years. I’m happy to call you guys friends and the “parasocial BAD!!!!!” debate that pops up in fandom circles needs to stfu because building a friendship with your audience and allowing yourself to be human with human feelings instead of some blank figure behind a screen is literally normal, lol. When people say nice things to you, it’s normal for it to feel good. When people say rude things to you, it’s normal for it to feel bad. 

Thank you for 10 years of love and thank you for reading! 

💛💛 Juju

ps think of me whenever you see pregnancy

[forbiddenfrvt]

E X S C A P E

thought you were an escape, now i can't escape your grasp | ex-boyfriend!Leon (modern au)

warnings: mentions of cheating and breakups (past and present), unknowing Leon + reader being an asshole, fingering w shifty praise and degradation(? not so much cuz Leon rlly likes you too much for that), AFAB reader/female anatomy, public lewdness, f perversion, messy.

word count: yet to be proofread, will update with count after so.

ps: I do not condone cheating or anything of sorts as written in my fics because they are simply just as is; fictitious. Please do not take to heart what I write, MDNI! block/scroll do not report.

author's notes: this might be heavily inspired of irl :"> I went to watch oppenheimer with my ex and he just came from the gym, needless to say it was something. (EXCEPT THE CHEATING! I AM SINGLE BTW, DW. NO CHEATING IN THIS HOUSEHOLD YALL!) (Linked a playlist at the top :3)

Exes should remain just as is; Exes.

Exes shouldn't be friends for that would create conflict.

Nor should exes go out together for a movie.

Yet you stood there facing the nearly crowded ticket booth, looking around for a familiar mop of dirty blond hair— the very same one you used to run your fingers across, enjoying how fluffed it gets.

It had almost been a year since the two of you split, vaguely remembering how the break up went down, all you could remember was going on a fit of jealousy, along with stress from school exams crashing down, and needed to run away from the emotional baggage which you considered relationship to be.

Leon had been trying to reach out since forever, and by forever meaning— a month after you completely cut contact with him and began dating other guys. All of which ended horribly anyway; ended by you, yet again. Always. You simply couldn't stay in a relationship for too long, that, you acknowledged.

Leaving whenever the connection felt shifty and their mistakes often made you fall dissatisfied and bored, and while you could technically make it work— why bother? They'll continuously disappoint you anyway.

Your current boyfriend is proving it so, with his not-so-boyfriend-like activities of constantly putting you in situations you don't feel comfortable of; despite your protests, with how he keeps linking up with girls you've already voiced your displeasure for— and his overall lack of social etiquette, embarrassing you wherever the two of you might go. Not that you care for it, it's not like you saw a future with him anyway.

You clicked your phone open as it dinged, notifying you of a message from none other than the guy you've long labeled the number as: [do not pick up.]

It was a surprise to you how calm you were about the whole ordeal; you didn't feel anxious about meeting up with him again. Sure, maybe a slight nervousness and making sure your outfit matched pleasingly, opting for a pink low-cut tank top with a matching sheer, flimsy cover-up. A pathetic one where it couldn't even cover the temple of your breasts. No, you totally did not care.

After accidentally accepting his follow request, he wasted no time and practically expressed how much he missed you. Voicing how hard it has been on him without you in his life, humourously coping along. As the messages between you and your boyfriend gradually shortened, exchanges between yours and Leon's went longer. Chemistry seemingly never faded between the two of you.

Of course, there was no flirting involved, in fact you two comfortably began cussing each other out in chats, not to the extreme— but almost just for playful banter. You both would share opinions and talked about your seperate experiences from watching Barbie, and how he cried in the movies after so. Reminding you to bring tissues when you went to watch Barbie, unaware how your boyfriend had already given you his handkerchief to wipe your tears away as he eyed you intently, amused that you cried for a film. He just doesn't get Barbie like Leon did— and that very night after the movie, Leon invited you to watch Oppenheimer together. Well, re-watched, as he already went to see it the day before.

All you could remember was giggling in guilt before agreeing to his plans; callously telling your boyfriend, [Goodnight, love you.] though text.

Bringing you here at this very moment, scanning the cinema for his figure, glancing left and right for your ex-boyfriend. It would've been easier if he wasn't already lining up for the queue but, well— what can the both of you do? Everyone's just as excited to watch both films.

Noticing his back from far away, you almost walked up, only to back away and hide into a corner— unsure if it really could be him; and so,

After you sent the message, you stared at the figure you had suspected to be him, waiting... and waiting till he checks his phone. And just as soon as he sees the message, Leon immediately turned around, sheepishly holding up an arm despite the numerous eyes confused at his random gesture. Searching for your eyes amidst all.

It was all you needed to see before confirming your guess, jogging up to stand beside him in the queue, smiling. “Long line, huh?”

Your eyes travelled along his familiar face, the boyish smile etched in the corner of his lips as he kept his gaze forward— eyeing you through his peripherals; his glasses making it harder for him however. You note this, or course;

He wears glasses now? Looks cute. Suits him.

“Yeah, they're taking too long—” He nods, shyly answering you, catching a whiff of your perfume, pink dusting his cheeks.

You catch this, nodding inwardly before you turned your head to the side, “How long has it been?” asking again, curious. “I've been standing here for about twenty-five.” His voice struggled to stifle a nervous laugh, fidgeting with the strap of his gym bag that sat right inbetween pecs.

Leon had informed you how he just came from the gym while he waited for you to finish getting ready, claiming that it was nearby the mall anyway. And to somehow prove this point across, he only changed his jeans but kept wearing the black compression shirt, tightly hugging his biceps— a soft smirk playing along your lips as you basked in his body, practically undressing his torso while he tried to focus on the movie trailers randomly playing along the TV screens of the ticket booth— memorizing half of the lines at this point, trying to ignore your burning gaze.

To which he drastically failed, handing you money while jibberishly making up an excuse to go to the bathroom, rushing away from you. With your eyes trailing behind him, a chortle escapes your lips as you notice how his cheeks reddened, being pushed up by his huge grin.

“...Fuck, he looks good.” You thought, trying to brush it off— not wanting to be having such thoughts about your ex, especially when you're (hardly) dating someone else already. Your fingers fiddle with the money, folding it in half in between your knuckles, glancing around the booth while patiently waiting for Leon to come back into your peripherals, curious why he had suddenly decided to use the restroom when he could've done it before you even arrived. Still, when nature calls. You simply have to answer.

A soft chuckle falls out of your mouth when he finally shows, a jump on his foot when he returns to your side, yet clearly displeased at how the line barely moved an inch. “Should we buy the late night tickets? I don't think we'd make it for the afternoon showing.” You chirp, eyeing the elongated monitor Infront of the queue, to which he flicked his watch— humming in response; “If you're fine with that... Sure. I don't think you should miss out on the intro.”

A part of you wishes he was watching it for the first time too, needing to see his raw reactions like you both used to; but another side of you was flattered by his decision to pay just to watch it again, with you, this time around. He was practically ready to throw money once again, all for you. And by all means! You weren't one to complain after all.

———

The two of you began giggling, and chuckling as you both placed bets on what movie whomever would be watching based on their outfits— people in pink for Barbie, leather jacket people for Mission Impossible, and well— random shirts for Oppenheimer. With him jokingly calling you weird for wearing pink on Oppenheimer and brown for Barbie. “Why even!?" His gummy smile beams, with you returning yours with a laugh. “Can't help it! ‘Love confusing people!"

“Well, that's true, you gotta keep them guessing your next move.”

You two were dorks together, even back then, just that now, it lacked any sort of physical contact— despite constantly brushing knuckles while you two walked side by side, fingers flicking up as if to try and entangle into the other's.

He kept the tickets in his bag, placing your umbrella in it, as to not have you lugging it around, knowing how forgetful you could be. You exchanged music, talked about concerts you failed to get into because the two of you were busy for the exams (quite literally around the time you two broke up), complimenting yet making fun of each other's chosen courses along the way.

He absolutely adored having you fill him in on ‘chisme’ he barely had anything to do with, reciprocating it with telling you drama over at his school. And being able to do it once again exhilarated the two of you; moreso him, but he wouldn't tell you of that.

“He has a girlfriend?!” “Why? Can't he?"

“No— it's not that! I'm just surprised— like— finally?!” You laughed, surprised.

Earning a chuckle from him; “I'm definitely telling you on Chris, you really doubted his charm, huh?”

You shook your head in disbelief, smacking his sides with the back of your palm as if to shove him away. “Oh hush!” Your groans of struggle didn't fall on deaf ears as he watched you battle with the lollipop wrapper, offering his help by taking it off your hands, “Here, let me.” he says, almost laughing. Taking jabs at each other as the candy proved to be unwilling.

“You can shoot a gun but not open a wrapper?” “You're one to talk!” laughter erupts from the two of you, back to back.

He watched as you softly sucked on the candy after successfully peeling the cover off, his breath hitching for a second prompting him to look elsewhere, mind lingering on the thoughts of your lips wrapped around and innocently sucking the sweetness of it, wondering how it'd be like to replace that spot in between your lips— Leon could swear he never felt envious of a lollipop until now. Mindlessly, you went closer to him, laughing as you both decided to go back up to the cinemas floor after buying snacks for the movie,

“We should take the elevator, I know your feet hurt by now.”

You suggested, for him to agree with a meek smile, “Whatever you want.”

The two of you stepped in, smiling at each other knowing how awkward you both felt around others during elevator rides, the unwritten rule of keeping silent inside made you both cackle inside. “It's just so weird!” You both agreed on that; eyeing each other and taking note of strangers' faces and scents— which usually ends badly for the both of you. Criticising a middle-aged man for wearing too much Axe like there was no tomorrow.

This time however, it was different, you could only stare at each other while stifling your laughter, both of you testing waters how far each of your inside jokes can go and what would be uncomfortable to speak of just yet— the two of you trying to be sensitive to each other's feelings and boundaries.

Your eyes travail his arms, up to his neck, staring at his eyes while you continuously sucked on the treat— failing to realize how suggestive you looked in his point of view. And all your ex-boyfriend could do was look up at the silver doors, praying a mantra on his mind to calm himself down. The comfortable silence between you two was enough for him to feel satisfied, he didn't wish to be greedy any longer. He had no right, after all.

He wishes he had.

As you reached the second floor, more people came in, forcing the two of you back in the east corner of the elevator cab, with your back pressed on the wall and him facing your side, making sure his duffle-bag didn't obstruct your movement and wearing it the opposite-side of you. There was barely anymore space for you to check your phone so you left it at your back pocket, ignoring the message notifications you received. Still, your mouth kept wrapping around the candy, with him trying to distract himself away from the noises your lips made— each pop, each suck, he could hear them all, giving him a pornographic thought to rush. He honestly wishes you'd stop it and bite the entire candy to quit tormenting his ears; but didn't want to make it obvious how much you provoked indecent thoughts to swarm his mind. It didn't help that his anxiousness made him think that the other people inside the cab could hear his thoughts. Read his mind. See how much he wanted to pull that stupid fucking lollipop out of your mouth and replace it with his throbbing cock instead, mouth-fuck you while everyone inside the elevator watched. A groan escaping his mouth as you fiddled with the hem that hugged his bicep, glancing back at you for a quick second as guilt washes over him; seeing how you simply were just curious about the fabric.

Leon hung his head back in shame and pleasure, enjoying your proximity to him while also feeling bad that even the most innocent of your touch and actions turns him into such a dog in heat. Warmth tightening around his boxers. You stared back at him, shooting him a snarky look, as if to ask; “'Fuck you looking at?” even though you were the one touching him without permission to. As if you knew you could do whatever you wanted and he'd be all the more welcoming of how much of a bitch you could get. He grinned, shaking his head “nothing.” before slumping his head into the cold walls of the ride— chanting "fuck." in the back of his mind. The doors then opened, making him smile in hopes that people would get off to create more space, but to his displeasure, a whole group of elderly came in, the smile in his face dropping ever-so-quickly; much more when he was forced to face you, pressing into your body as the seniors pushed inside. Forcing everyone else younger than them to adjust for their comfort. Which included you and him.

Your hands are raised in front of you, pathetically creating a barrier between your chest and Leon's albeit his pecs were more on your face than it is yours. “Fuck.” you heard him groan, as you bit your lip, awkwardly chuckling. “You okay?" You asked in concern, a nod following suit in response. Their movements only affected the two of you even more, annoyed yet at the very same time, flustered at how much your bodies were being squashed against one another. Without much choice, you both fell silent, waiting for time to pass by. His staggered breathing didn't go unnoticed by you, however, making you stare up at him with your eyes slanted, “Leon? Are you sure you're okay—?”

Your line of questioning got cut off as he pressed his lips against yours, mumbling a “...shut-up.” while he positioned himself to block your body from view. His leg entraps you between his thighs, slightly bending downwards to reach your lips.

“Lee— stop, what are you doing...?” you mumbled back, brows furrowed. What was he really doing?

Is he out of his mind?! Why would he kiss his ex-girlfriend in such a cramped place where people can easily see if they just look back!

You were met with silence as your breast engulfed his arm the moment another elderly decided to move around, pushing Leon's gym bag on his side, and forcing him to push back into you, his hands gripping just above your wrist as he tried to find some sliver of composure— unsure if he really should, and if he could continue. Looking at you apologetically for getting carried away.

Yet all this did was turn you on. The forced proximity between you two, the excitement of getting caught making out with your ex-boyfriend in such a high alert place, being with said ex without your boyfriend knowing, and, well— being cornered by such a tall and muscular man that you've long fantasized touching drove all of your senses out of the window.

The way he simply looked like he committed a grave sin against you made it all the more enjoyable.

Silently, you snaked your arms around the back of his nape, inching your head to bury it in the crook of his neck. His eyes followed your movements and shared an agreement, as if you both just understood what the other wanted to do. God knows how long you've waited to do this, ever since then, and more so now. You were more than happy to continue this, and to prove that you trailed kisses along his neck, just below his ear, earning a gentle groan from his lips, raising a brow as if to ask you if this was okay.

“ 's more than okay, Leon.” you whispered, planting a soft kiss at his jaw, smiling at the random stubble tickling your soft skin. Wondering what Leon would look like with a more prominent stubble, when he's older maybe. Your eyes darts to the front, checking the coast before hiding back into his chest, waiting for his next move; “Can you stay quiet f'me?” He mumbled against your skin, pleading. Your hips instinctively bucked towards his as you register his words, as if your body knew what he meant and wanted. Eager to indulge his desire.

In an instant, he found his arm in-between your thighs which you ever-so-sweetly parted as much as you could for his easier access, hand gripping the fat of your inner thigh. While it infuriated him that others could get to see those soft and sexy thighs of yours in that skirt, he had never been happier in your choice of clothing than now. Thanking the fashion heavens for convincing you ahead of time that wearing a skirt while going to the cinemas with your ex-boyfriend who clearly has yet to get over you; a good idea.

“God, s' fuckin' wet for me already babe?” He mumbled inaudibly against your skin, eyeing your cleavage down while he rubbed the pad of his middle finger along the hem of your slick damped lacy panties, chuckling to himself but just enough for you to hear his comment, “Starting to think you planned for this to happen, slut.”

You jolt at the sudden term, baffled at his choice of words, moreso because you've never heard him address you like so— hell, you've never done anything remotely intimate before. A small peck on the lips was all you two ever got during to the time you both dated.

“Fuck, why did we even break up...” He groaned, “Cuz you hung around Claire more than I would've liked?" You chuckled, “I told you, she's nothing but a friend... she's Chris' sister for godssakes...”

Maybe it was his pent up frustrations about your relationship, or how he saw this as the only chance to act on his fantasies about you. Blush dusting your cheeks as you bite down on your lip, holding off a moan as you promised.

“Can't believe I'm letting the guy who cheated on me with his so-called girl-bestfriend touch me like this.”

His fingers hastily snaked inside your underwear, fighting off the urge to grunt loudly as he felt the warm wetness that pooled within you, not wanting to alert anybody; not wanting this to end so quickly. “I didn't! I could never cheat on you, please... I would never, fuck.”

“Leon—” You whispered against his ear, stopping his ramblings with your voice honeyed as ever, making him addicted to even the slightest of your sighs. “Hurry.” He almost came at how needy you sounded, shaking his head hoping to compose himself, smirking at your command. Wasting no time, he curled a finger inside of you, slowly, wanting you to enjoy and feel up each joint, trying to help you fantasize about it to be his dick— all stuffed in you, exploring your insides.

You roll your eyes as you've finally felt the satisfaction of feeling him being inside you, albeit inferior by a point to what you normally would've imagined; exactly wishing the same thing as he was. His finger slowly dipped in and out in quick intervals, as if trying to loosen you up, his thumb resting above your clit, moving it in circular motions. At this point he wasn't even paying attention to the discomfort of his throbbing member still encaged within his jeans, too focused on making you feel good, wanting you to cum on his fingers alone, wanting nothing more than to please you. In a way, hopefully earn you back? Right, if he could make you feel good, you'd definitely want to keep him and take him back, right?

Your fingers slowly dug into his shirt, the friction of it all hurting Leon more, wishing he just took it off since the contact of your nail on his shirt pressing down on his skin was all too uncomfortable. “Mhm ‘h shit!” You groaned, a little bit of your saliva dripping to the corner of your lips, alarming Leon and a middle-aged lady on your right. Of course, being the quick-witted cutie you were— simply smiled at her direction; playing it off. “I think I cut myself, can you move your bag?" You asked Leon, faking a pout; which he quickly followed along, laughing inwardly. “Ah— yeah— shoot, sorry! I think I- yeah, sorry.” He used his free hand to move the bag, covering your thighs further, while he continued his ministrations. Finger-fucking you harshly now as he slid another digit, simultaneously pumping two fingers in you while his thumb toyed your clit, loving how swollen it had become.

As soon as everyone else looked away and focused on their business, you started leaning into Leon's chest, your breathing eventually became laboured— wanting Leon to feel a sense of understanding just how much he makes you feel right now; and as so, you began palming his crotch through the dark-washed denim jeans, rubbing him the same pace he was doing to you. “Princess, no.” He stops you, knowing he'll make a mess if you touch him more.

“I want to touch you, Lee.” You whined, kissing his sculpted yet soft chin, brows furrowed while you inch your knees up, needing him to get his fingers deeper in you which he did, following up your body— pressing himself against you. “Please, let me touch you,” more pleas for reciprocating his motions fell from your mouth, more eager to touch him than he was.

Fuck. Leon could only curse in his mind, you looked so adorable, sexy, and beautiful all at the same time with how you pleaded for his own pleasure, loving how you reciprocated his want for you, how much you wanted to return the favour, but as much as he wanted to— he couldn't let you, not if you both want to leave the lift without judgemental stares, that is. Leon shook his head ‘no’, chuckling, “It's okay baby, this is about you.” He was fully committed to giving you what he could at the very moment, and more if time allows him. “Let's focus on you.”

Your smile deforms into an "o" as he dragged his index finger, going from your clit down back to your entrance, pulling in just the tip of his finger before pulling out again, teasing you while he pretended like it was his cock diving into you. “Look at the mess you're making at the floor, babe.” He ushered, retracting his hand from you almost abruptly you could've sworn even the gods heard the squelch your pussy let out. “That'a dirty girl.”

Embarrassment boiled in your stomach, along with a knot forming, you were so close, too close and he stops mid-second, making you ache for continuance.

It didn't help how he was far better than your no-name boyfriend back at the small town you went to school for, sure, you crushed and pined on that boy too but, he disappointed you in bed so quickly, God forbid how redundant his movements were whenever he fingered you, unable to make you cum like you thought he would; what was the point of leaving your other ex-boyfriend for him if he was a no-better fuck? You don't even remember the last orgasm you've had, and it was only ever your fingers doing the job with some porno flick playing on your phone. An erotica here and there. You could've sworn you'd stay single instead and fuck yourself. But God did Leon surprise you. Your previous boyfriends (well, except for him) couldn't dare compare.

“Leon, stop it...!” You whisper-yelled, furrowing your brows, daring not to look down for you could already feel how much of your slick had dripped down, “For someone who cares so much about janitors, you're really out here making their jobs harder; huh?” He joked against your ear, not even hiding how proud he was with that cheeky boyish grin on his face, probing his fingers back inside you as he followed the rhythm with how he bucked his hips into yours. Loving how dumbfounded you had become under his touch. He wanted to flick his phone right there and then, to record you; ah maybe next time, if you allow it.

You leaned against the walls of the elevator, the cold surface kissing your blood-heated skin. He rocks his fingers faster, in awe of how fucked-out you already look, with how you lolled your lips like that, which he took advantage of and kissed, sucking on your strawberry cream tasting tongue. Your eyes rolling back as you fail to care if anybody has noticed anymore, whining against Leon's request.

And he doesn't seem fazed, pumping his fingers inside you with more fervour. Grinning from ear to ear at the development of your relationship. God, he wished he had done this sooner, maybe more often, maybe if you realized he can be good for you, you wouldn't have broken up with him— this time he'll prove just that. And you'll make sure of it too, right?

You tapped on his shoulder, eyeing him and shooting him a signal ‘I'm about to cum,’ your eyes shutting close as you ride out your high, griding against his hand, desperate for release; which he gladly obliged to, using his thumb to drum at your clit, pressing his palms closer to your crotch so you could grind on it further while he vibrated his fingers inside you, flicking it back and forth inside, reaching for that one specific area, the spongy spot he had discovered just earlier, “Gonna come for me, pretty?” He asks, eyes soft, “Cum for me, go on, cum. I wanna feel you all over my hands...” His whispers turned into a mantra, saying it over and over again like a string of Hail-Marys, urging you to release. And exactly that— you did. Biting your lip as you brought his free hand over your mouth, using him to muffle the moaning mess you've started to become. Each whine and huff.

He felt the warm liquid drip down into his fingers, his hand, as it makes its way to the floors, laughing in a twisted sort of humour, feeling awful for the person who'll clean it up but was also glad someone will gawk upon the mess he helped you make. Happy to have participated in ruining someone else's day.

Leon then took his hand away from your pussy, dragging it ever so slowly before wiping some of the slick in your lips, “C'mon taste yourself f'me?” He smiles, prompting you to open your mouth and do as told, it's only fair you do so, right? You slightly grimace at the thought that you'd accidentally meet eyes with someone while you sucked on his fingers, licking it off your juices, so you figured closing your eyes was your best bet at avoiding the awkwardness; rather than telling Leon, 'no.'

“Atta girl,” Once he felt like it was clean enough, he pressed his thumb over your throat, putting just enough pressure to force your mouth to open for air, itching a cough— which he then slid a kiss into, tasting your cum-ridden tongue with a satisfied grin, letting you go as he heard the elevator ding, helping you fix your panties and skirt as you both arrived at the destined floor to the cinemas. Waiting patiently for your turn to get out, he plants a softer kiss against your forehead. “We're gonna focus on the film, right?" He cheekily smiled, blushing a tad while you rolled your eyes, feigning annoyance with your hand smacking across his bicep, walking hand in hand towards the cinema room indicated on your tickets; “Ugh, shut up. Yes.”

You were so breaking up with your boyfriend after this.

[reasonsmandy]

With love, Eddie Roundtree

Eddie Roundtree x Fem!Reader

✧.* requested by anon — saw you're taking requests for eddie roundtree x reader so i wanted to ask if you could do something inspired by either tear in my heart (twenty one pilots) or lets fall in love for the night (finneas)!! love ur writing btw!!

✧.* you're reading part one, here's the sequel — Dear Eddie Roundtree

✧.* summary — Your life in the acting business has been very stressful, but in one night Eddie makes you forget about it all.

✧.* warnings — Extremely fluffy content, mentions of drinking and drugs.

✧.* word count — 2.2k

✧.* 🎸 — Eddie's masterlist

✧.* mandy's notes — I tried to mix a little bit of the two songs, I don't know if I managed to do something very good. but i hope you like it 🫶🏾

"We'll send Harold to your set more often, the gossip magazines will start planting the idea that you two are together." Your manager said excitedly, he insisted on the idea that you should fake a relationship with actor Harold Schmidt. "I can already see the headlines: Y/N L/N and Harold Schmidt the Hollywood lovebirds"

"That would be the most ridiculous thing I've ever read!" You say rolling your eyes with a glass of water in hand.

"Well, I don't care!" Your manager says, getting a little mad. "You know you need these rumors to boost your name, and you're lucky that Harold agreed to fake this relationship with you."

"I don't need anyone to get my name to boost Adam!" You say irritably. "And besides, no one will believe I have something with this guy, we never talked before!"

"Stop making things more complicated Y/N." He says. "You know it's going to be the best for your career, now rest … tomorrow we have recording early"

He leaves you alone in your apartment, you put your face to the pillow and let out a scream in it. Being an actress was amazing, but there were things that frustrated you a lot in the profession like what you were experiencing now, you had never exchanged a word with this Harold guy and now you had to pretend to be madly in love with him for everyone. Just thinking about it sounded crazy.

Despite all this fake dating mess Adam wanted to shove you down into, you couldn't stop thinking about what happened a few days ago. You received an invitation to attend the party of the band Daisy Jones and the six. It was a really fun night where you finally managed to distract yourself a little and it was also the night you met Eddie Roundtree, one of the nicest people you've come in contact with in such a long time.

Let's say you had gotten along quite well…

You weren't really in the mood to leave your apartment, but you felt that if you stayed another two hours listening to your manager talk about absurd things about how you should fake a scandal for your name to go up you would go crazy. So when Daisy Jones' invitation reached you, you thought: Why not?

Which was exactly why you were now in Billy Dunne's backyard, having a beer and smoking a joint. Nothing very interesting seemed to happen around you and there wasn't anyone very interesting to talk to.

Well, at least the music is good... You thought.

As you traveled in your thoughts and watched the unknown people around you, Eddie Roundtree watched you too, he stared at you trying to remember where he knew you from.

"I'm telling you man, she must have stopped by the studio sometime." Warren says to the bassist.

"I'm sure that's not it, otherwise I wouldn't remember her" Eddie says frustrated.

"Eddie, man!" Warren changed his expression, he looked amazed at something. "Rollerball!!! She was in the Rollerball movie!"

"Holy shit, that was it! I knew I knew her somewhere." Eddie beams, overjoyed that he finally remembered. "I didn't remember she was so beautiful, man…"

"Go talk to her!" The drummer says, pushing his friend towards the actress.

You notice the two best friends laughing and pointing in your direction, not understanding you turn to look behind you but no one was there. You arch your eyebrows hoping they'll notice that you saw them, which takes a few minutes to happen.

The blonde approaches you, with a smile on his face and two beers in his hand. He sits down next to you, handing you the drink.

"I have a challenge for you." he says, catching your attention. "Tell me a song you like and if I get a part of the lyrics right, you spend the night talking to me."

"Look, I didn't even need the challenge, I really would have talked to you without a problem" You say laughing. "But since you offered…"

Eddie Roundtree: I was so lucky that Camila showed me this song *chuckled*

Y/N L/N: He had changed 50% of the words in the song but he seemed like a nice guy, so I pretended he got it right.

"Y/N that's my name" you say while taking a sip of beer "You are?"

"I'm Eddie" he smiles, taking a closer look at your face.

You spent a few hours talking about everything, it was impressive how he managed to talk about any subject you proposed. He really seemed to be interested in what you had to say, something you missed. You told him that since you moved to Los Angeles you haven't been to any of the tourist spots in the area, which he found absurd, and that's why you were in Roundtree's car going through the city streets with no final destination.

"I can't believe we're doing this" you laugh at the situation, probably the beers you had had made you a little happy. "I don't even know you well and I'm in your car going to unknown places."

"Ouch!" He pretends to be offended. "I told you my whole life tonight, what do you mean you don't know me?"

"Oh yes, of course I apologize" You laugh looking deep into his eyes, something inside you wanted to be closer to him.

"Wanna get a swim?" he says, parking the car close to the beach, you could hear the waves from afar.

"That's a terrible idea..." You say getting out of the car, alarmed he gets out too. "I'm in!"

You take off your shoes leaving them near the car, running wildly towards the dark sea. Eddie shakes his head in disbelief, taking his shoes off and chasing after you, or at least trying to.

You wait for him where you could just feel the water on your feet, he approaches holding you by the waist and going with you into the sea. Would it be crazy to feel so connected to someone in one night? You didn't know, and you didn't care! When the icy water came into contact with your body and his body heat kept that feeling more intense, nothing else mattered.

Trying to fix the locks of your hair, you looked at him in disbelief with everything you were experiencing that night, it's been so long since you've felt alive like this, free from any pressure.

"I feel like I've known you since forever, Eddie Roundtree." You whisper, kissing the blonde's lips intensely.

He holds you tighter, as if he wants to remember this moment forever, the fear of forgetting what he was experiencing in the morning was intense. After all, with all that they had both smoked and drunk, it was probably that the passion, that love, would fade from their memories during their rest until tomorrow.

The early morning wind hits your bodies making you shiver with cold. You soon decided it was better to get back in the car and go somewhere else. Eddie didn't care that the car would be wet because of your clothes, nothing else mattered to him, that night was so intense and wonderful that he just wanted to stop time to have you there with him a little more.

And logically, after smoking so much, the munchies hit, so nothing more plausible than changing your destination to the nearest bar. It was hard to find anything open at that hour, but after several turns you finally managed to spot one.

There were just the two of you and one other man who was clearly begging for you two to leave as soon as possible, so he could get to sleep.

"I don't think I'll remember anything tomorrow, my head is already exploding" You say, drinking some of the juice you ordered.

"Is that so?" Eddie asks, stroking your hand across the table.

"Uhum" You mumbled, and he could tell that you were getting tired and needed some sleep. "But don't worry, I promise you that if I forget about you tomorrow I at least fell in love with you tonight."

Your words made him feel butterflies in his stomach, he looked at you with affection and without containing the smile that grew on his face. He didn't want to settle for the idea that he wouldn't see you anymore.

"Did you fall in love with me too Eddie Roundtree?" You say sleepily, slurring your words as you struggle to keep your eyes open.

"I for sure did, Y/N L/N." He says, getting up to pay the bill. A few seconds later he comes back. "Can you tell me where you live? I will drop you off at home."

"No please, I want to spend more time with you." You whisper, closing your eyes with long blinks.

"I promise you will see me again" He says, stroking your hair. "Now tell me pretty girl, where can I drop you off?"

You tell the bassist the address of your apartment, so soon after he takes you to the car trying his best to avoid making you feel the wind with wet clothes, afraid you might catch the flu or something.

As the sun slowly rose, you fell asleep in the passenger seat. Roundtree slowed the car down so as not to wake you up with the potholes in the road leading to your house. Admiring you in the moments when he didn't have to keep his eyes on the road, a smile appears on the blonde's face as he observes how much prettier you look with the sunlight on you.

He wakes you up when he arrives at the scene, you mumble something he doesn't understand and you hide your face in his neck, he feels butterflies in his stomach with the contact and already misses you when he finally has to say goodbye.

"So I think that's it…" Eddie said, holding your hands. "Take care, pretty girl".

"You too baby." You place a peck on the blonde's lips, then hug him for a few seconds. "You better not forget me huh."

"How could I?" He smiles, letting go of your hands. "I'll see you."

"I hope so." you say, walking into your apartment and soon falling asleep on the couch.

…

The sun was already setting and you were ready to spend the rest of the night watching anything on television. When Adam shows up opening your door like he has an emergency going on.

"Adam what the fuck!" You exclaim, trying to calm down from the fright, he came in with a box in his hands and a magazine in the other. "What the hell is going on?"

"Y/N L/N you naughty girl, if you were dating you should just have told me!" He says sitting next to you, handing you the magazine. "Now it makes sense why you rejected my fake dating idea"

The magazine had a picture of you in a bar, an orange juice in front of you. You had the straw between your teeth smiling at the man in front of you. Your hair was wet and your clothes looked soaked too, as did the man in front of you in the photo, Eddie. He was looking at you with a smile, his eyes were closed if you looked fast, but as you knew that smile very well you knew that when he smiles his eyes shrink. The headline read: Y/N L/N and Eddie Roundtree the romance of the Stars.

You quickly open to the indicated page to read what it said.

Sub Rosa

AUGUST 9, 1977

Eddie Roundtree and Y/N L/N! they are the definition of a star couple

No, your eyes are not deceiving you! Last night after one of the parties given by rock star Billy Dunne, our Hollywood star Y/N L/N was seen with the bassist of Daisy Jones and the six: Eddie Roundtree, leaving the party.

The charming bassist was rumored to have been with L/N throughout the event and he was even seen with our favorite actress in a bar a few hours after the party. Although this is the first time we've seen these lovebirds in public together, you must agree that they make a great couple.

Would that be the end of Y/N's single life?

You finish reading in disbelief, bursting out with a hearty laugh at the last sentence.

"They basically called me a spinster!" You say when you're done laughing, taking a breath to compose yourself. "Look, me and Eddie we-"

You are interrupted by Adam again, who hands you the box he had in his hands when he entered. Curious you take it, seeing a note on top that you decide to read later, inside the box there was a cassette tape, a rose and a napkin with a phone number.

You are still confused and decide to read the note.

Hey pretty girl, I hope you're doing well.

As I promised you, through these things I decided to earnestly ask you to let me have more wonderful nights by your side.

On the tape you'll find my attempt to sing that song you told me you loved, the rose is for pure chivalry and the phone number, well... I think that's clear.

I hope to hear your voice soon…

With love, Eddie Roundtree.

...

Hi, I hope you enjoyed it... If you wanted to ask for something my requests are open, and if you want to ask and don't have any ideas check out my prompt list :) xoxo

Want to be tagged when new stories come out? REASONSMANDY'S TAG LIST

[insurrection-if]

You have no reason to apologize! People here are too entitled just because they gave a follow/like/reblog. You don't owe anyone anything. If people are unhappy with your progress they can easily unfollow.

These kinds of people never realize how those kind of messages don't inspire they deture. I've seen so many If blogs deleted and ifs canceled due to these kinds of messages.

If writers have a life outside of their If and don't work for followers. I'm sorry you have to go through these things. You deserve respect and not someone telling you you're wasting your time and not doing enough. Your health, be it mental or physical, and personal life is more important than getting an update or demo out. Take your time and make something you're going to personally love and have pride in. Ignore these people and take care of yourself.

Thank you so, so much for these wonderfully kind messages.

I admit, I perhaps overreacted a bit in that last response I gave. It caught me at a very bad time and my emotions, which I had not had under control for a quite a while leading up to that, sort of carried me away.

I had been in a multi-day state of what felt like unending panic, not able to relax even in my sleep, from factors entirely unrelated to all this. Atop all that outside stress, I was grappling a lot with my guilt towards all the progress I was losing to the overload of work and exhaustion from my day-to-day tasks. That message had felt like the final testament to how I was failing at absolutely every aspect of my life.

I do not think I was in the right state of mind to read or respond to it then.

But I am so incredibly thankful for the kindness, grace, and understanding that was shared with me after that poor response of mine. Tumblr has not been the most fun or attractive space to me for some time—as I still am not the most adept or comfortable with social media apps outside YouTube—but it has been incredibly reassuring and heartwarming to see so many kind and considerate individuals on this site.

Again, apologies for all my negativity and gloom. That is not the mood I wish to share so much, especially when this whole project of mine was begun as a means for my own fun and expression. It’s just a lot of pressure I’m imposing on myself and amplifying to the most ridiculous extremes in my head.

Thank you so much to everyone who has been so patient and forgiving, it means so much more than you could ever know. (　´∀｀)b

[camthesolemnone]

Sorta of a HeavyMedic vent(?) oneshot cause I've been inactive on AO3 for so long

"Mein lieber, you look frustrated."

The scene Medic was greeted with upon entering his lover's bedroom was not one he would have preferred. Heavy was sitting at his desk with a pencil in hand and a blank sheet of paper in front of him. The giant was hunched over, straining his muscles and revealing all of the stress in his shoulders and neck. His expression was scrunched up; it appeared that he was on the brink of punching a hole right through the paper.

"I am! This feels pointless!" Heavy responded.

Misha's overly harsh tone notified the doctor that this was not a spur of the moment irritation: it was suppressed anger that he had been holding in for days or possibly weeks. It was an extremely unhealthy habit, and while Ludwig would normally chastise his lover for this type of behavior, he knew that comforting words would be more effective in quelling his beloved's rage.

"What seems to be the problem? Having a bit of writer's block?" Medic asked in a cautious tone.

Heavy snapped back: "It has been months! There is no inspiration, no motivation! Whenever I put pencil to paper, I lose my will to write. I feel as if I have gotten nothing done."

Ludwig understood the true magnitude of the situation and was determined to support Misha in any way he could. He too fell into fits of unproductivity in his medical work, and it could feel crushing to the point of suffocation at times. The doctor paced over to Heavy and squatted down to his level. He placed his hands over his lover's with the intent of kneading the tension out of them.

"Why do you think this creative drought is occurring? You are a master of poetry, my dear, so I am certain your head is not completely devoid of ideas."

And the medic was correct. Heavy had so many different story ideas in his mind at any one time, but it came with the caveat of not knowing where to start. Most of his ideas lived and died as a single paragraph in his notebook, never pursued further after the initial burst of excitement. It felt like a never ending cycle.

"I do not know, Medic. I was so productive before--I even published a book! I have more time now than ever to create, and yet I am stagnant" Heavy explained.

"How about you take your mind off of it for a while? We can grab lunch, and maybe you will be more motivated by the time we get back," Medic offered.

"Nyet! That is exactly why nothing is getting done! I say that to myself, and then spend the whole day polishing Sasha or playing Poker! I don't know what has happened, Doktor!"

The more that Heavy described his struggle, the more clear the picture became to Medic. He was trapped in a terrifying cycle indeed: it wasn't just a case of short term writer's block, but the fault of a larger, well-hidden force.

"Misha, mein Kuschelbär...do you think you might be depressed?"

Heavy's anger intensified and it appeared that he was about to lash out at Medic for making such a claim when he suddenly froze. The giant slowed down and sunk back into his seat, really considering his lover's words.

"No, I can't be! I am not a weak baby man! Only small babies suffer from sadness problem!"

Medic sighed and shook his head.

"Depression isn't necessarily only characterized by sadness. It is associated with a lack of motivation in daily activities and can affect you in many different spheres of well being--"

Ludwig stopped when he realized that his explanation was getting a bit too professional. Professional rationalism was not was his lover needed in the moment: he needed compassion.

"Heavy, it's okay to accept that you're not well. Anyone of any age group can feel this way. I'm here for you, as your doctor, and lover."

Slowly but surely, the frustration on Heavy's face began to fade. He had been made fun of as a child in his small Russian village whenever he cried in public. Additionally, his father had essentially drilled into his head before his passing that a real man concealed his feelings from his loved ones. He thus grew up with the notion that any form of emotional distress was a sign of weakness. His partner was determined to change that thought. Misha's fists loosened as Ludwig whispered reassurances to him, allowing him to fully entwine their hands. The German leaned in to give the Russian a soft kiss on the forehead, which resulted in the first smile from him Medic had seen since entering the room.

"The Medigun cannot heal emotional damage, but I might have some medication in my cabinet that could help." Medic ended off his sentence with a playful wink.

Heavy laughed at this comment and pulled Medic up to sit in his lap. He placed his chin over the doctor's shoulder, nuzzling the crook of his neck whilst keeping him close in the iron circle that was his warm arms. Ludwig joined in with the laughter when Misha's stubble tickled his neck.

"Thank you Doktor. You have taught me valuable lesson. I will face this depression head on and write poetry again! ...And Heavy wants love from his medic now."

Medic smiled, relieved to see his beloved in a better mood.

"Affection can certainly be a remedy!"

[pinchraccoon]

Pinch Reviews: Spark The Electric Jester (1,2 and 3)

In an unusual fashion for me, I'm choosing to review the entire Spark series in one fell swoop. Somewhat recently I decided to play the entire series with my friend and cohost Space Buffoon. They proposed playing the series with me on stream as we're both fans of the Sonic The Hedgehog series, and Spark has very clear shared inspiration and DNA.

Over the course of three weeks, Buffy and I played the three titles in the Spark series, opting to play them in order. I'm choosing to cover the three of them today because I feel that comparing and contrasting the games to one another can shed some light on their strengths and weaknesses.

Spoilers, of course, for the entire Spark series!

Spark the Electric Jester, the first one, is a 2D platformer focused on speed and using powerups to creatively remove enemies from the optimal path. Notably, Spark differs immediately from Sonic while maintaining the core gameplay loop in that, far different to 2D Sonic's shield powerups, the powerups in Spark act much more like they might in a game like Mario, or like the different weapons in Mega Man.

The multiple different powerups in this game serve to further diversify an already diverse gameplay loop, finding alternate paths, by granting the player significantly different abilities and movement tech with which to maneuver through levels and carve out the path the player would most like to take. Whether it's removing specific enemies from blocking a path, or something as simple as an extended jump, the powerups allow players to express themselves really effectively. The powerups are also complimented by the stage design itself, which gives all the powerups that they contain a time to shine within them, and occasionally rewarding creative exploration with different, rarer powerups as well.

Every level in Spark is really satisfying to complete, and despite being longer than the typical level within the genre, it's rare to become bored with the levels as their visual themes as well as the gameplay gimmicks and powerup swaps keep them interesting. The levels are also a phenomenal example of this game's lovely visual style. It's this charming pixel art that really grants a lot of character to the world, it's locales and it's people.

The story in Spark the Electric Jester is a fun, simple romp that calls upon a cute cast of side characters and recurring villains, although I would have liked if the Shadow the Hedgehog-esque "Fark" or "Fake Spark" were better executed in the main game. Otherwise though, Spark has some really clever and somewhat self-aware writing that knows what this game is and what it's trying to be. Spark wisely doesn't seek to do more than it's earned in this game, and I applaud it for knowing its limits. Also, I really like Spark as a character, particularly his grounded nature and apathy toward the situation at hand. He's a good person, but at the end of the day the guy really just want to pay rent more than anything else. His presence in the story makes for a really fun juxtaposition to some of the more serious elements that it tries to pull, and grounds the story through him.

Really the issues I had with the game were incredibly small, primarily that the final boss felt extremely underwhelming due to the unique "Super Spark" powerup that the player is given feels supremely underwhelming, and being able to die far easier in that fight kinda kills the tension of what could otherwise be a really cool moment. I wish to stress, though, that my issues with this game are minute, almost inconsequential, even, and I only feel a need to bring up my issues with what is otherwise an extremely solid and consistent title because I had a great time with the game and just wish it was *that* much more improved. It is very close to being a game I could call a modern classic, but something like the final boss and other, very minor quirks do stick out to me because I *want* this game to be excellent. As it stands though, it's a really great experience that I would absolutely recommend.

Spark The Electric Jester 2 brings the series in a bold, new direction compared to its predecessor, which is to say, Spark is fully Not in the game. Also it's in 3D now.

Spark The Electric Jester 2, or as I'm choosing to call it because I'm spiteful, Fark2, is a 3D platformer with some of the same combat elements as the first game, but with the notable change, of course, of being a 3D game.

I won't beat around the bush here, I don't think this game is very good whatsoever. There is genuinely nothing notable that I liked about my time with this game. Because I will surely go off on tangents about every minute instance of failure on which this game underperforms, I have opted to segment this part of the review, so as to maintain concision, and make my point as clearly as possible. I am going to discuss Fark2's gameplay, story, and presentation separately from one another.

Gameplay

Fark2 controls about how you would expect it to, you have a fast character who has a homing attack now, attacks that can help deal with enemies that cannot be dealt with by the homing attack, as well as a parry. Similarly to the previous game, Fark also has access to his own powerups, but not even close to the same amount as Spark had. Additionally, Fark has access to a few "special" moves that can be performed by holding a button and then pressing an alternate input.

With this core kit in mind, the tools given to the player would imply that the usage of all of the items within Fark's arsenal would be used, much like how Spark 1 heavily encouraged and featured the varied use of abilities and powerups to reach the end of a varied and interesting level. This implication, however, is wrong. In reality, very little of the kit given to you actually does end up being used, as the most effective tactics available could not possibly be simpler. I mean it without a shred of irony that every challenge that this game poses to you, outside of a boss fight, can be trivialized by simply running and jumping. This is because Fark is genuinely too fast for the levels, and the amount of space that he covers means that enemies, many jumps, and in some cases major portions of levels can just be ignored. By just running and jumping with the occasional homing attack, players can ignore 90% of Fark's auxiliary kit, including the special moves, the parry, and perhaps most damning, the powerups.

Levels in this game are often very open, and enemies do not populate enough of the space within the levels to actually be able to pose a threat to a player who is, literally, just running and jumping. Normally, I don't have an issue with level design that allows and encourages the player to speed through the level and even in some cases ignore mechanics for the sake of that speed, but I want to emphasize that this is The Entire Game that is like this. It almost feels as though, combined with the extremely generous health system, Fark2 makes genuinely no effort to actually try to kill the player, or worse, makes no effort to make the player adapt. The player creativity that was present in the first game is completely gone in this game, thanks in large part to the fact that the most effective tactic available is also the easiest tactic available.

A quote from Soren Johnson and Sid Meier, creators of the Civilization series, comes to mind, and I feel that this quote and the information that it presents can aptly highlight the issues present within this game's gameplay loop.

"Given the opportunity, players will optimize the fun out of a game; One of the responsibilities of designers is to protect the player from themselves."

I find this quote to be particularly important in discussion of this because, well, the devs are blatantly not attempting to challenge the player enough to encourage them to engage with anything other than what works immediately, and the result it an uninteresting slog through a collection of straightaways with nothing of interest to break them up.

This game is not entirely a platformer, however. This game has a combat system and it would just *love it* if you were to engage with it, so it does throw you into several combat scenarios with bosses so as to not waste the effort made to animate punches and kicks. Unfortunately, while it is an instance in which the player has to do *something* other than run and jump, every boss encounter can also be trivialized, this time by spamming the attack button mercilessly until the opponent falls to the ground in about 45 seconds. Now, I played the game on normal difficulty, and I don't always think that games should be super super hard all the time, but I do think that a boss encounter of a kind shouldn't go down in 45 seconds in a third person action game-style combat system on the baseline difficulty of the game. Because of how absolutely spineless the bosses themselves are, they feel pointless and kinda pathetic, really.

To conclude the section on gameplay; Fark2 does not make enough of an effort to actually make the player use any of their advanced tools, regardless of how success within the game is defined. Because of this lack of interest in making a player engage with the game, the game is boring and feels meaningless to play.

2. Story

Fark2's story fails to captivate, or even begin to intrigue me for a multitude of reasons, not the least of which being that I find Fark, the middling "edgy version of the MC" from the last game not particularly interesting or compelling. Fark2 doesn't actually do much with any of its story beats, and creates countless plot hooks that are never resolved, such is the case with the majority of the game's bosses, Float, Flint and Double, all of whom the player learns next to nothing about except that they're working with a somehow edgier clone of Fark named E.J. and that makes them bad, because of course it does.

The story culminates in a predictable and uninteresting "I was created by the enemy" notion, the likes of which we've seen countless times, notably, in the series' influence. I am not kidding when I say it, Shadow the Hedgehog (2005) does Fark2's core story better than Fark2 does.

Of course, a lot of games have predictable, or otherwise simple larger plots that are saved by good or writing that has a lot of character, so does Fark2 have that?

Absolutely not, not even a little. Get a look at this line, to see what I'm talking about.

The overly edgy, completely ironic way that this game plays itself is not only annoying to try to make sense of, but also refuses to go all the way with it. Every character comes off as edgy, but not edgy enough to where I can even begin to see the cheesiness that they're going for. After a certain point you begin to just tune out as secondhand embarrassment begins to set in.

The writing style that was so endearing about the few instances in the first game where dialogue would happen, particularly the tongue-in-cheek tone, is completely missing from this game, and comparing the two's writing styles to one another feels like night and day. It's dissonant to play these games one after the other, as they feel completely unrecognizable from one another.

It's so obvious that the writers want you to like Fark really badly, but they don't give him anything to latch on to as a character to actually make him likable. Comparisons between Spark and Fark as protagonists are unavoidable, but the most notable point in which the two diverge where Spark succeeds and Fark doesn't is that Fark fails to provide almost any input into the story itself, getting pointed in countless different directions for one reason or another, or for no reason at all. Fark feels like an engine to move through a story that he both is and isn't the center of, whereas Spark feels intentionally disconnected to events at hand because he doesn't particularly care about them.

Speaking of Spark, where is he? They mention him once as "being off enjoying a blank check" but that begs the question, why didn't they name the game "Fark the Electric Jester?" It's just supremely weird to me that in a game named after a specific character, that character has actually NO on screen presence. In some way, it feels like false advertising. And, considering that the devs are billing it as the *same series* the writing inconsistencies seem even more dissonant. If this were a spin off I would get it but it's not! Why is it named after a character who isn't in the game? This is like if the next Shantae game was called Shantae: The Curse of Driftwood, and then the game has no appearance of Shantae herself, and you're locked into playing as Rottytops.

The story of Fark2 fails on so many fundamental levels that I can't say that it's worth it to watch any of the cutscenes. It suffers issues on several fronts, from unsatisfying conclusions, plot contrivances, pointless characters, an attempt at intrigue that fails spectacularly, and a protagonist who is extremely easy to dislike.

There's one thing I didn't hate about this game's story, and that's that it does do the super form better than the first game did, but only because it wore a sickening amount of Dragon Ball on its sleeves.

3. Presentation

First, to get this out of the way, this game has some fun butt rock songs to play in boss fights, despite how lame those fights themselves are. I appreciate the attempt there, but music choice in this game is really quite odd.

There's no way I can put it politely, this game is not satisfying to look at. The textures are passable at best, the area design is really quite same-y and the model work for many characters is butt ugly. The two former problems I can pass, they're still problems, but I feel that the issue of the models cannot be as easily forgotten.

The way that these characters are executed in 3D is, disappointing to say the least, exacerbated by the fact that are that you see *in game* has every one of these characters looking far better than they do here! I'm consistently left confused about what happened here to make all of these characters look like they have all of their features stickered onto their face, which is genuinely just a sphere.

I genuinely like all of these character designs! I think that everyone here looks cute or cool in some degree, but to have such an uncanny representation of them in-game does a legitimate disservice to these characters. I know 3D modelling is hard, I get it, but there should be a point, I feel, where a product isn't ready to be implemented into a build of the game, and none of the models of these characters were ready yet.

In Conclusion about Fark2:

Fark2 fails at just about everything it sets out to do, it's largely uncool, uninteresting, boring, and I don't feel that it is worth your time, and especially not your money. It's gameplay, story and presentation aren't anything special, and it isn't even "so bad it's good." This game is painfully mediocre, and I would believe it if this game were something of a demo for the following entry in the series. Clearly, someone felt that this game is as pointless as I feel it is, because every one of its levels were used as late game extra content in Spark the Electric Jester 3.

Spark The Electric Jester 3 is another 3D platformer, but makes significant improvements to everything that Fark2 tries to accomplish.

First and foremost, Spark the Electric Jester 3 manages to provide fast-paced, fun core gameplay that actually necessitates challenge to the player in both combat and platforming sections. Spark, as the rightful playable character in this game, has access to a large arsenal of combat and movement abilities, which are unlocked from an ingame shop, which serves to naturally encourage the player to learn each move as they can afford it. Spark can also double jump, as well as charge a dash forward that can be used in midair. Despite there not being much more than there was in Fark2 from a platforming perspective, the platforming of this game is far more satisfying as the levels themselves are actually made with Spark's movement and abilities in mind. Levels will frequently push back against you, and require that you at least manage a degree of skill to succeed.

On the combat of things, everything has been revamped to allow combat encounters to feel like anything more than a spam fest. In Spark3, players are encouraged to earn stunlocks against opponents in order to maximize the amount of damage that they can pull off off of one option. Additionally, use of the parry is more difficult, but no less required, making each combat encounter with lots of enemies into a test to see if the player can manage their combo strings while avoiding or parrying enemy attacks simultaneously. Again, compared to some of the action games that this gameplay loop is commonly accredited to, it's a bit more barebones still, however as it isn't the whole focus of the title, and the sections where the pure combat sections are used are somewhat far between, the combat doesn't get old and remains a welcome refresher when platforming could risk getting monotonous.

Spark3 sees the return of powerups, again, however the player doesn't actually get many of them at all in a normal intended playthrough, really only getting maybe one of them for certain. I got to play with the Reaper powerup during my playthrough as I managed to defeat a certain boss who was supposed to beat me on my first attempt on him, and I think that this is a really interesting way to handle the powerups. Each powerup has much of the same fundamental kit, so players are never left wondering how to input something compared to Spark's normal moveset. I found this powerup implementation to be rewarding, but I felt myself wanting more upgrades to unlock in more apparent ways throughout one playthrough.

Level design in Spark 3 is extremely varied, and consistently visually and mechanically engaging the whole way through! This game works on the basis of certain "worlds" that unlock as the player progresses, sorta like how more rooms of Peach's castle will open at certain amounts of stars in Super Mario 64. Each level within these "worlds" are themed around a specific concept, like a city in a state of riot, an airport/rocket launch facility, or a militarized jungle. The theming of these areas doesn't just account for visuals, however, as each of the areas themselves are also considered for what could be interesting gameplay-wise. For example, one level in the airport level sees a plane crashing and Spark having to escape, in a rare timed level with strong wind mechanics attempting to throw the player off. Or, in the rioting city level, players can jump off of crowds of protestors for a boost, and use a helicopter in brief, but consistently solid vehicle sections. Speaking of, I adore the car sections. Spark3 starts in a car section and I adored every second of it. It's a thunderous, no-nonsense beginning to the game that served to really effectively set a tone that had me down for anything as soon as it started.

Despite being "down for anything" Spark 3 does lose me in one area. I don't think that it's story is very good, really. My primary issues with the story are that, despite far better writing, this game fails to actually deliver on any of the hooks that it puts out, and seems far more interested, for some fuckin reason, on fleshing out characters from Fark2, specifically the main bosses from Fark2, at least two of which are presumed dead at the end of that game. While there is *a degree* of plot relevance that there could be, in that Float, one of the presumed dead bosses from the previous game, appears to have returned, and seems sad about having dead friends. I take issue with the notion of how this is done however, because Float doesn't actually tell Spark anything, and instead this information is exhibited through stylized 16 bit cutscenes, which while looking cool, take up significantly more runtime in the story than is necessary, especially considering how this story ends.

My BIGGEST issue with Spark3's story is its *egregious* ending, which I will warn prospective players about spoilers for if they're averse to that sort of thing, BUT the rest of this paragraph will concern these spoilers. Spark3 ends in a way that couldn't have been seen from three feet ahead of you. Spark3's ending is, no joke, comparable to NieR Automata and Neon Genesis Evangelion. There's nothing wrong with an ending like that art has, I quite like endings like that, but mostly because art like NieR or NGE EARN their endings, by laying consistent plot threads the whole runtime about something mysterious. Spark3 does *not* do this, and instead pulls it out as shockingly as possible. The entire game is predicated on "Spark has to go and remove Fark, who has become something of a dictator, from power, as he's militarized most of the world using the Fark Force." Now, this is a novel concept, cute even! I really hate Fark, so I'm down to bring him down a peg! But upon reaching the end of the game Spark reaches Fark, who doesn't want to fight him, and instead explains to Spark that both of them have been in a simulation for 3000 years, and Float, a character who's past we learned a lot about in this game, was actually a fake created by the simulation arbitrator, Clarity, in order to lure Spark toward it's own goals. Notably, there have been ABSOLUTELY NO notable clues that the world was a simulation. Additionally, in a near final boss moment, they make you play as Fark, which pissed me off personally, but that's not empirical it's just something I didn't like. The issue with Spark3's story is that it spends five hours of runtime satisfied in the status quo of it's normality, while it attempts to end with something that would have been far more effective, and far less jarring if there were ANY foreshadowing AT ALL. Because Spark3 doesn't have an interest in actually encouraging the player to think about how the game outside of the typical "big simple punch off" fare, it doesn't work to implement something as left field as the ending that is in the game. Additionally, the game ends on a discussion between Fark and Spark, who are dead, and have been dead, about the importance of keeping moving forward, really played pretty straight, no jokes, no irony, then immediately after the credits roll is a Friday Night Funkin reference. Tonal inconsistency is *so* rampant throughout this ending.

The ending, regardless of if you did or did not read the previous paragraph, left me so dissatisfied with the game that my opinion on this game soured significantly, to the point where on stream I actively did not recommend the game to viewers because of the ending.

To conclude, Spark3 is a game with a really excellent gameplay loop that doesn't leave a lot to be desired, and consistently seeks to challenge the player while also giving them opportunities to experiment with new and fun toys that consistently spice up the gameplay loop whenever present. Despite the quality of the gameplay, this game's story is not only unfulfilling, but also useless within the context of the game itself. There are two cutscenes that matter, and they're the ones before and after the final bosses. I would recommend Spark3 to someone looking for an exemplary gameplay experience, however I wouldn't begin to recommend the game to someone who wants a deep or interesting story.

Now that I've discussed each game at length, I'd like to conclude with a short review of the series as a whole. S

park, when the direction accounts for potential shortcomings, is extremely fun, however the series' writing is consistently passable at best, with some egregious exceptions that make it hard to not skip every cutscene after a while.

Spark 1 is a really fun and interesting romp through a variety of interesting levels in 2d, with an overall fun atmosphere that doesn't seek to take itself too seriously, much to it's benefit. Complete with a multitude of gameplay styles and extreme encouragement of player creativity, it's an excellent way to satisfy a 2D speed platformer itch.

Fark 2 is awful.

Spark 3 takes consistent points from Spark 1 regarding player creativity, visual diversity, wealth of content, and attention to fun and engaging experiences that makes it easy to recommend for it's gameplay and visuals. However, the game's story takes itself far more seriously than it earns, much like Fark2 did to no avail, and the story becomes worse because of it.

If you'd like to watch these playthroughs for yourself, they're all up on my YouTube channel linked below! Thanks so much for reading!

[greypetrel]

Hey!! <3 For the writing questions, 4 (in Italian or English or both c:), 19, 26, 36

Hello there! <3

Ooooooooooooh number 4 is such a cool question! Thanks for asking it!!

4. What’s a word that makes you go absolutely feral?

I love ideophones, onomatopoeic words that sounds as the thing they're describing. LOVE THEM.

Croccante (crunchy), in italian, it just gives you that idea of crunchiness when you say it! /krok-KAN-teh/ Sibilo/Hissing (meaning the same thing), you need to hiss to pronounce them? Wonderful.

Give me some well-done allitteration and I'll be yours forever, also don't let me start talking about Coleridge who was a genius in giving sound to his poetry ("furrow followed free" *swoons*)

I also love big, altisonant and funny-sounding words that takes too much time to say, or, as a person who studied philology, words that have history to them.

Pantagruelism (buffoonery or coarse humor with a satirical or serious purpose : cynical humor ) (also buffoonery is a great word) Boycott (to engage in a concerted refusal to have dealings with (a person, a store, an organization, etc.) usually to express disapproval or to force acceptance of certain conditions) who comes from the name of an Irishman that just... Decided to stop paying taxes to the English.

As "Feral" in the sense of words I can't stand... anything with a "squelchy" sound (squelch is another onomatopoeic word... But it's a kind of sounds that triggers me and I can't stand xD). "Squelch", "Moist", in italian "Ciuccio" (EEEEW. Ciuccio is probably one of the words I find the most horrible ever. PLEH. /TCHOO-tchow/ . I repeat. PLEH.)

19. Tell me a story about your writing journey. When did you start? Why did you start? Were there bumps along the way? Where are you now and where are you going?

I started very early on as a hobby. In my family we all write little silly stories for funsies, so I just... Followed the example and wrote my own. I think I started writing prose along with comics (a friend and me used to draw little comics one for the other). I came to an abrupt stop with prose in my early 20s: I started playing GDRs that worked with writing what your character did... And it was fun, but I was getting problems with Anxiety, very stressed, and a couple of bad comments convinced me my prose was boring and hard to read. I felt EXTREMELY self-conscious about it and stopped with prose whatsoever, just stuck to comics and screenwriting where I could rely on drawing. I got back to prose... In September, with Dragon Age fics. It's being a difficult and busy period, but I still needed some creative outlet. So I started to write because it's quicker than comics, I can do it on my phone, with zero instruments to bring along and needing no space. It was just for my own consumption, when inspirations stroke or I played something that left me with a "Yes that was good... But I want MORE of it. I think the first think I blorted out was this Trespasser piece (it's longer on my file, there's an extract). I started to write pieces here and there... And then thought it would have been nice to have a place to put them all in order. And sent a request to AO3. (as a person who once said "No I could never write fanfiction!". Look at us, little me, we're getting better!)

26. How do you get into your character’s head? How do you get out? Do you ever regret going in there in the first place?

Massively daydreaming, doodling things, roleplaying them in my head. DnD alignments and personality tests GREATLY help me to get to know them better (MBTI works fine as guidelines, as Tarot cards and even Zodiac Signs. Don't believe in Astrology, but as a personality test it's fine enough). Listening to music and imagining scenes and scenarios on it. Whatever works. I get out when I need to focus on other things, mainly I change the playlist. xD

36. They say to Write What You Know. Setting aside for a moment the fact that this is terrible advice...what do you Know?

I know passion and believing in my opinions and standing up and making them heard. I know sadness and melancholy, I know of crippling anxiety and being scared and feeling little... And how to live with it. I know blood does not run thicker than water, and that sometimes your family is not the one you're born with, but the one you find for yourself. I know of distances, and that they don't really matter with the right people, not today, not with internet. I know kindness even if it's still a work in progress. I know my mistakes and of trying to learn from those and getting better. I like to think I know of books, or that I am enthusiast enough to reference them and take inspirations from dead authors, lore and mythologies, finding patterns and recurrencies. I know of sailing and the sea, and I'm lucky to know what it feels like to have an animal choose you as its companion.

... And this is getting sappy and too lyrical so I'll stop. Oh, I know when I'm getting sappy too!

[longeyelashedtragedy]

🥳 Why did you start writing fanfic?

🌻 How often do you read your own fics?

📗 Do you want to write something outside of fanfiction? If so, what about?

💭 What inspires you and your writing?

🤩 What led to your interest in the fandom?

:)

🥳 i started writing fanfic before i even knew that's what it was, and i think it was because i loved my interests So Much and just wanted to let my mind run wild with all the possibilities and just disappear into my favorite things even more. also since i've literally always written rpf i very often had a crush on someone i was writing about (before i totally realized that's what it was?) so it felt kind of extra tee hee and exciting to make them go through all kindsa shit on the page. PLUS writing gives you full control over something until the characters start acting of free will on the page and you're like Wait stop i didn't want you to do that and that feeling was also really important to me when i was younger.

🌻 i read my own fics all the time even though i think my writing quality has severely declined because i'm often the only one writing what i want to read. also because i think my writing is SO bad these days sometimes other people's writing stresses me out 😂

📗 yes, definitely. i've always wanted to write a personal essay about going to my grandma's funeral in the midwest during the 2017 "polar vortex." so much happened that weekend and i learned a lot about my family. it was very profound and also the extreme cold and all the sensory experiences that came from that set it apart as this very particular moment in time.

💭 a lot! sometimes just like, having a boner lmao. but often i write out of wanting to express/explore certain emotions. loneliness, loss, angst, guilt. sometimes just wanting to experiment and see if i can imitate a certain style or just make something happen.

🤩 i got into football fandom over the span of yeaaaaaaars and yeaaaaars but what ultimately led to me starting to write about it was uh, interactions between a footballer and my previous fandom 🇫🇷🐈

[beeseo-portfolio]

This was the first board of my NCEA Level 3 Design portfolio. My biggest artist models were Akira Mikame, Hayao Miyazaki, Omocat and Natasha Allegri. My other inspirations apart from artist models were Puyo Puyo, Genshin Impact, Omori, Puss in Boots: The Last Wish and Blue Period. My art style was heavily inspired by Puyo Puyo, the imagery and symbolism: Genshin Impact, the colour and character archetypes: Omori, and the story: Puss in Boots and Blue Period.

I grew up enjoying watching anime and playing story-heavy games, so I was inspired to create the same: a story called Nova Arcanum about students exploring their identity in their final year of an extremely academic-driven high school.

I wanted the characters to all be distinct through personality, silhouette and colour pallete to be able encapsulate different archetypes so that the target demographic can relate to the experience or experiences of the characters.

This was the second page of my NCEA Level 3 Design portfolio. Chronologically, the environments were made before the book covers. The environments were difficult to make as my main inspiration for the buildings and style was in the Gothic Era, where the buildings were tall and extremely detailed. The Gothic Era's buildings were high to symbolize reaching up towards the Heavens, in which in the case of Nova Arcanum is to reach up towards the stars. In all the environments apart from the forest I used many straight lines with almost no straight lines. This contrasted to the forest which I did not use any perspective lines in the planning, used much brighter colours, and did not use any straight lines to break the conformity of the other settings. The school, Nova Academy, is a place where academics are placed above the others and restricts self expression, so the library inside the school, the classroom and the whole school is dull and grey.

I wanted two different types of logos: one for the comic and one for other uses, such as products. Comic book logos are usually very thin and wide to be able to include the graphic in the cover as well as other texts. I wanted the first one to show how whimsical and fantastical the story is. The other logo is more square and emphasizes more on the star imagery that is present throughout the story.

I wanted the book covers to show progression of the characters' dynamic over time: the first book cover having the main character reading a book by herself, the second book cover having the characters in different places in terms of heirarchy, and the last one where they are all fathered together as a group, discussing the stars. This progressions shows their growth as a group and as individuals against the odds.

This was the third page of my Level 3 NCEA Design portfolio. This entire page was all about creating the graphic novel and seeing the fruits of my labour. The story follows Lyra's day into the first day of the last term of school where they are in a group project to find out what makes stars shine in this world. I wish to expand further and create more pages to develop the story more.

This is my overall Level 3 NCEA Design portfolio. During my time in high school, it emphasized academics over all else and even made the arts academic. My graphic novel, Nova Arcanum, is a criticism of the education system and how it stunts personal growth for the sake of academics. I was heavily affected by this (as seen in my Level 1 Visual Art portfolio) and felt the weight of expectations of my peers around me every day. Being able to express my stresses through the characters interacting with the world around them was a great way to de-stress myself (as the arts in were the highlights of my high school career). As a way to cope with my stress, I dissociated most days of my NCEA career into a fantasy world. However, this time, I used it to help me process my reactions to the world and used it to better my growth, and that reflected in my work.

I used Procreate for all of my works in my Level 3 NCEA Design portfolio.

The technicality of my works improve greatly from my Level 2 NCEA Design portfolio to my Level 3 NCEA Design portfolio through my logos and the quality of my illustrations. The colour pallete in my Level 2 board is very consistent yet there are no experimentations or variations to diversify it. My Level 3 NCEA Design board has more experimentations with colour and diversity in colour pallete, which broadens my horizons in art. As I have more agency over my work and have less struggles with immersive daydreams, my work develops further that signifies my growth as a person. Further explanation of my design portfolio (from page 10 onwards): https://drive.google.com/file/d/1LPknkO48RHGQvd7bh4nMZshIRVuZyt8a/view?usp=sharing

[carcosapr]

Stress Test: Decibel Magazine Premeires Debut Video “Bastard Behavior” From Oregon Thrash Upstarts

Oregon thrash/punk act STRESS TEST—featuring current and former members of Unto Others, Drouth and others —is proud to announce its debut singles “Bastard Behavior” and “Eternal Bliss,” taken from its upcoming debut self-titled EP.

CHECK OUT DECIBEL’s PREMIERE OF “BASTARD BEHAVIOR” HERE

“This is a record I've been wanting to make for years but, until recently, never felt I had enough energy to actually put together,” said frontman Brandon Hill. “Late last year I finally felt motivated enough, or maybe disgusted with the world enough, to finally turn the ideas into something.”

Inspired by the chaos, violence, corruption and extremism rampant throughout society, guitarist/vocalist Brandon Hill (Unto Others) turned to writing as a way to express the hopelessness and anger felt towards mankind’s failures during the pandemic. STRESS TEST is a documentation of those mental struggles and a way to confront the darker aspects of humanity exacerbated by isolation and the constant barrage of negative news.

Recorded and mixed by Gabe Johnston (Unto Others, Hoaxed) and mastered by Brad Boatright (Integrity, Obituary), the two singles are taken from the upcoming EP, which will be revealed in due time. For now, this serves as an introduction.

FFO: Aus-Rotten, Cro-Mags, Dystopia, Napalm Death, Power Trip

STRESS TEST at the time of recording:

Brandon Hill – guitars, bass, vocals

Colin Vranizan – drums

STRESS TEST is:

Brandon Hill – guitars, vocals

Adam Jennings – guitars

Dylan Morris – bass

Colin Vranizan – drums

https://www.facebook.com/stresstestpdx

https://www.instagram.com/stresstestpdx

https://stresstestpdx.bandcamp.com

https://www.youtube.com/@stresstestpdx

“If you like Power Trip and Glacial Tomb, Stress Test are a band you need to hear expeditiously.” — Decibel Magazine

[rawrmiski]

CAS report - October

The ‘c’ in October stands for creativity! And that was my focus for that month.

For the span of four weeks I tried baking different types of cakes every week. I mostly found inspiration online, but I also asked my family around, about what they want to eat. On the last week I switched to cooking instead of baking, because I discovered an amazing recipe for fried tofu! Yum yum.

Week one: matcha cookies with white chocolate chips

I made them with my friend when I came over, and honestly it was extremely enjoyable. Sadly I don’t have any photos of the baked cookies, because we ate them so quickly!

Week two: Matcha Cheesecake

I think that it is easy to notice a pattern here. I am a proud matcha lover, and due to the influence from Instagram Reels, I try incorporating it into my baking passion.

Week three: banana bread

Week four: crunchy tofu with caramelized carrots and avocado

This one more of a whole dish than one food, but I enjoyed it nevertheless.

Reflection:

I hope it doesn’t sound to tacky, but this month taught me a lot about acts of service as a way of expressing love. Every thing I prepared were made with intentions of making people happy. The cookies were a way of bonding with my friend, banana bread were name-day gift for my sister and the tofu meal was made to prove my family that vegetarian food can be tasty as well.

Sadly, my sister didn’t eat my tofu, settling for meat instead. Maybe one day she’ll try plant-based food too.

The matcha cheesecake was my funniest creation yet. The amusing thing is that I don’t even like cheesecake and I barely ate the one I made. However I made it anyways, because my family loves cheesecakes. It might sounds too dramatic, but seeing people I love, enjoying something I made for them felt much more satisfying than if I simply made something for myself.

Although baking and cooking itself stresses me out, I’m always anxious about other people not liking the things I made, it always pays off. However what I didn’t enjoy was the cleaning afterwards. But I guess it was worth it.