#this drawing was made like 2 years ago but i still luv it

[dinxie]

anyone remember Code Lyoko? Yumi was my favorite character

[grimoireofwritings]

Headcanons: The Magic Knight Captains & Their Art Styles

Just some random idea that came to me today while reminiscing on what the Captains do in their free time. I began to picture how it would play out if each of them were instructed to show us their art skills! Here's what I came up with.

Captain William Vangeance:

This man is not too bad at art! He doesn't put a lot of pressure on himself to make perfect sketches and he has low expectations for himself... So he mainly considers it a hobby set aside for his rare moments of leisure time. Since he's so chill about it, his sketches come out looking nice when he's more relaxed. This is usually the case since he prefers using his bird journal - he likes to bird-watch and put together little drawings of the winged friends he sees while laying all content out in his garden. He's no prodigy but his hand-eye coordination is pretty good and after years of practice his birds and trees turn out pretty impressive. Very embarrassed if asked to show people though.

Credit: Found in a "how to draw" guide.. no name

Captain Nozel Silva:

He prefers appreciating sophisticated art made by others.. and really doesn't care much for making it himself. If he draws anything, it'll usually be rushed - as he knows he's got more important matters to focus on.. Still, he is capable of putting together a sketch every now and again of something simple. Usually plain posable objects. At the end of the day, he's not really a big art freak and even at a nice art museum he gets bored after an hour or so.

Credit: unlisted. Message if you know where it's from!

Captain Fuegoleon Vermillion:

He likes art, a lot! Like William he's no prodigy, but it makes him happy so that's enough for him. He prefers to paint, and his subjects are often women, focusing on anatomy because he enjoys exploring movement / dimension through bodily posing. He likes painting silhouettes that are dancing and often have flowing clothing, or hair. Definitely focuses on the beauty, passion, and artistic self expression side of it. He isn't as open about it because Mereoleonna poked fun at him for it so much and he'd rather not deal with any of that again.. but people who know about it always talk about how he's quite talented.

Credit: Anastassia Orehova

Captain Yami Sukehiro:

He's listed in the manga's assorted questions brigade as the #2 ( Behind Rill) judge of artistic style and taste! He's got an excellent eye for art, and he can be really creative medium wise, but I still feel like he's a bit too lazy to sit down for a long time and really commit to a canvas or sketchbook. He doesn't find it rewarding enough for his attention span.. but he seems to be pretty good at making simplistic, cartoon styles really expressive.

Credit: Olga Shvartsur

Captain Rill Boismortier:

He is ALL about color, vibrancy, and bold presentation! His paintings are always so full of vivid life and brightness, it's clear to see he's a person carrying a wondrous imagination and endless creativity. Everything he's made seems like it's bursting with optimism and excitement, as if the artist couldn't contain himself. He is extremely versatile and can tackle almost any subject, which is super impressive for his age. His one flaw I'd say is that sometimes his paintings, despite being gorgeous technicality wise, can get a little busy or cluttered as he struggles to not get carried away with all the different expressive ideas he comes up with. He's still learning!! ( Bonus headcanon: Rill has a mandatory weekly art class set aside as "training" for the Aqua Deer magic knights.. Everyone attends regardless of their actual interest levels because nobody wants to handle seeing Rill devastated that people didn't show.)

Credit: Svenja Jodicke

Captain Dorothy Unsworth:

Pretty self explanatory? She's a kawaii sailor moon theme anime waifu. All her drawings are magical anime girls... But they only appear in her dreams, so nobody knows she can draw well!!

Credit: source link to deviantart page was a removed account 😭 please lmk if you know the artist

Captain Jack the Ripper:

Nobody wants to talk about Jack's art. He doesn't wanna draw and nobody wants him to draw. Anything he makes is simply a cursed image, no questions asked. He's got the artistic skills of a grade schooler... And even though he can be somewhat creative, the fact that there's always some kind of disturbing / violent undertone incorporated within the picture... It just looks like a demented child's drawing.

Credit: could not find name but it's a canvas displayed in "The Museum of Bad Artwork" labelled as "The Butcher" and tbh that makes it even more terrifying

Captain Charlotte Roselei

She's listed in the top three WORST artists / judges of fine arts in canon... Which is interesting to me, lol. I think she probably stopped trying a long time ago after being teased for how her stuff turns out, lol. She tried drawing or painting and would get frustrated with her inability to create an image she's picturing in her mind.

Credit: could not find name but it's a canvas displayed in "The Museum of Bad Artwork"

Captain Kaiser Granvorka:

I don't know a whole lot about him tbh but I know he is also listed as an excellent artist next to Yami. I think he'd be really into sophisticated art! Kinda like Nozel but far more dedicated and passionate about it. Still-picture images, but he finds a lot of joy in shapes and objects, and messing around with shading.

Credit: unlisted. Message if you know where it's from!

And that is all my friends!! I am still trying to hunt down some art credit for these images, some were on Pinterest or just unlisted altogether. I'm gonna put them down once I come back and edit this post when it's not 3am 😂 plz let me know if y'all can help me out with that. I know there's an online site somewhere that's made for this but I forgot what it's called???

This was a lot of fun to make though. If you disagree or have thoughts, feel free to reblog or come chat in my ask box! Goodnight luvs 🥰

[365days365movies]

May 10, 2021: Blade Runner 2049 (2017) (Recap: Part Two)

Said I’d talk about artificial humans in sci-fi, so...

There are a HELL of a lot of examples of artificial humans in science-fiction, as well as the ethical and philosophical concepts that their existence raises. Now, your definition of “artificial” may differ from medium to medium. At its base form, these are humans that are not born, but made. I’ll be talking fleshy organic humans, not robotic ones. The most common of these is, of course, clones.

A clone, strictly speaking, is a genetically identical copy of a pre-existing organism, in this case a human. While this isn’t technology we’ve applied to humans as of yet (due to the NUMEROUS ethical problems and questions), we have done so with animals, mostly sheep and cats. It’s actually a good way to de-extinct certain species, and we’ve already done experiments with that. Of course...that has its own concerns.

Keeping up the Jurassic Park reference streak! Anyway...

There are a FUCKTON of examples of clones in science-fiction, but since I’m a massive comic book nerd, I’ll use Superboy. The genetic combination of Superman and Lex Luthor, Conner Kent is one of the most prominent clone superheroes. He’s not the only clone of Superman, of course. He’s not even my favorite clone of Superman, to be honest...

Bizarro am the worst. ME WILL LIVE ON THAT HILL.

Oh, and let’s not forget THE most prominent artificial human in comic books PERIOD. I don’t care what her origin in the movies is, that’s never been my favorite version of Wonder Woman. Making her a demigod robs her of something important, in my opinion.

...Should I make a comic book blog? Shit, thinkin’ about it.

OK, before I do that, these are just my favorite examples. Fact is, there are FAR too many examples of artificial humans to go into, whether they’re built, grown, sculpted, conjured, or a chemical reaction with an extra ingredient in the concoction.

And look, I could go on all day about this, but we got a long-ass movie to get back to. SO, lets jump back in. Part One is here!

Recap (2/2)

Understandably exhausted, K returns home, confused and conflicted. However, he’s greeted with a surprise from Joi: a prostitute! Namely, this is Mariette (Mackenzie Davis), one of the girls who approached him earlier. Joi’s called her here in order to be “real” for K, the effect is impressive, if somewhat...off-putting. Still, while K obviously didn’t need this to be happy with their relationship, Joi might, and Mariette’s all on board.

And it doesn’t take K terrible long to get on board, either. As both Mariette and Joi strip, it makes me wonder...how much does this subscription service for Joi cost. There’s no goddamn way this is free, right? Like, how exclusive IS this AI? And they cut from that scene to a Joi commercial, where we hear that Joi becomes anything you want her to be, and does anything you want her to do. But something tells me that...well, that it’s not quite so simple.

Once the night is over, Joi tells Mariette to leave, and not nicely either. Mariette leaves, rebuking her on the way out as well. K, meanwhile, knows that the Blade Runners will soon be coming after him. He’ll be going on the run, and Joi wants to go with him. And so, they put her inside of a remote device, while deleting her information from the main apartment console. This gets the attention of Luv, who head over to the apartment to figure out what’s going on.

K goes to Doc Badger (Barkhad Adbi), who analyzes the horse for him. It’s discovered that old radiation can be found there, and that amount and kind of radiation can only be found in areas where a dirty bomb has been set off. This would be in the desolate and weird-ass ruins of Las Vegas. While nobody lives there at this point, K and Joi go to check it out.

An IMMENSELY frustrated Luv, unaware of K’s discovery about himself, goes to confront Joshi about K’s whereabouts. Luv berates her for being afraid of change, and tells her that she “can’t fend off the tide with a broom”. Which is a great line. However, as Joshi is no use to her at this point, Luv just straight up kills her. Which, I’m sure, will go over well with the whole “Replicants aren’t dangerous” thing.

Meanwhile, in Vegas...shit is WEIRD. First off all, the desolate wasteland is full of statues of giant sexy wimmin, and I mean GIANT statues. Beneath one of them is a series of beehives, which K goes into to get a hand of beeeees. After that, he goes into an abandoned hotel/casino, rigged with tripwires and booby traps. OK. What.

So, somebody’s using this place as a hideaway, despite the entire city being destroyed by a dirty bomb, and probably extremely radioactive. K searches around and finds it empty. He begins to play a piano, hoping to draw someone out. He ends up drawing out a dog, as well as the inhabitant of the hotel.

Rick Deckard (Harrison Ford), baby! Quoting Stevenson’s Treasure Island and holding K up at gunpoint with dog at side is the original Blade Runner himself, Rick Fucking Deckard. God, I love this. Deckard hunts K down throughout the casino, where we see some trippy holograms, and the future of Vegas stageshows (probably).

The two fight, but eventually call a truce and decide to get a drink at the bar. K gets to it pretty quickly, and confronts Deckard on his potential child with Rachael. He confirms that Rachael was indeed pregnant by him, but he had never met his child. Which was the plan, to be fair. He wanted their child to be protected, not hunted down and eventually dissected.

Sometimes, to love someone...you gotta be a stranger.

To an old Frank Sinatra song, a forlorn K (now calling himself “Joe”) looks around, and sees carved wooden animals that resemble the horse that’s haunted his life and memories so much by this point. Which makes sense, considering the foil unicorn from the previous film. Neat little tie-in there.

But paradise is not all it’s cracked up to be, as someone soon comes to find both K and Deckard, despite the fact that K came alone. Although, now that I think about it, Joi may not be one that you can truly trust. Deckard and K try to escape their pursuers, but are caught pretty quickly. In the process, K is injured, but manages to get up in order to fight back. However, this is Luv with these people, and she beats K down EASILY. Turns out that Luv is actually an enforcer, rather than just a secretary. And when Joi awakens from K’s device to ask her to stop, well...she kills the device, and she kills K. In the process, she also takes Deckard away, leaving K behind. Fuck.

K wakes up, only to discover Mariette standing over him in the Las Vegas wasteland. She takes care of him as he wakes up, also stitching up with wounds from the explosion. She tells K to trust her, as well as her compatriots. One of them is the hooded woman from earlier, a Replicant named Freysa (Hiam Abbass). An old friend of Sapper’s she saw the delivery of the child, the “miracle”, and also hid the child away, as it was a symbol that the Replicants are more than just slave, that they are their own masters.

Freysa is building a revolution in order to free the Replicants once and for all. And I’m hard-pressed to disagree with their cause, not gonna lie. However, this comes at a price. In order to prevent Wallace from killing the cause, K must prevent Deckard from leading them to Freysa. They must do what they can until they can reveal the child to the world. For she will be their leader.

Fuck.

Understandably COMPLETELY crushed at this revelation, and more confused than ever, K collapses. Freysa tells him that they ALL wish they were the one, and they all believe. It’s at this point, that K realizes exactly who the Hybrid is: Dr. Ana Stelline. The horse from earlier, it turns out, did in fact belong to her, and she planted her childhood memory with the horse in K’s mind as a Replicant. Damn. DAMN! That’s why the memory moved her so: because it was hers.

Meanwhile, Deckard awakens to a separate nightmare: Jared Leto telling him how he feels about him. After all, Deckard helped to create the first Replicant-human hybrid. He asks him for his help in obtaining the child, so that the key of Replicant reproduction can be further unlocked. And he proceeds in convincing Deckard by playing audio of Rachael and his first meeting (from the first film, of course).

Niander fucks with him further, by suggesting Deckard was summoned all those years ago specifically to fall in love with Rachael in order to father a child with her. But despite all of this, Deckard refuses to give up any of his information. And so, Niander pulls out his ace-in-the-hole...and it’s a real shitty thing to do to a man in mourning. 

Damn. Dude rebuilt Rachael, tries to tempt Deckard with her, FAILS, then lets Luv shoot her in the head. Fucking power move, and fuck Niander for playing it. Dude is a DICK. Meanwhile. that one visual from every single ad of this movie is happening, and I can FINALLY use one of the 8000 GIFs of it, goddamn.

Not gonna lie, it’s an iconic appearance, so I get why it’s so famous. Anyway, K considers a suicidal option, now that he knows the truth. However, before we get to see the final decision, we get to see Deckard being taken back to LA for interrogation by Wallace. However, to prevent him from potentially leading Wallace to the secret of Ana Stelline, K suddenly appears, opening fire on their ship.

The craft is downed, and K exits the car to engage in a firefight with Luv. He appears to win, but Luv isn’t killed once she’s shot. The two have a fistfight out in the rain, and Deckard waits for water to slowly kill the craft that he’s still inside of.

As expected, Luv handles herself well, and despite a number of close calls, she JUST. WILL. NOT. DIE. Damn, she’s resilient. However, despite K, Luv, and Deckard all nearly drowning in an INTENSE fight between the Replicants, an enraged and crazed Luv finally eventually drowns, ending her threat for good. 

K saves Deckard from the sinking ship, and agrees to stage his death, allowing him to meet his daughter for the first time. Once at her facility, K returns Deckard’s horse to him, knowing that it was a gift from him. He tells Deckard that his best memories all come from her, implying that this makes him similar to Deckard’s son, which he picks up on when he asks if he’s OK.

Deckard goes to meet his daughter, and K hangs out on the stairs outside. He feels the snow fall on his hand, and he just...watches it all fall around him. He sits, and he watches it all. And meanwhile, Deckard meets his daughter for the first time.

...Can I just say...GODDAMN!

That movie was absolutely stellar, and it’s definitely landing in the high ‘90s for me, calling it now. I...wow. Seriously. Amazing.

See you in the Review!

[edengarden]

Hey pls could I get a regular matchup for bnha!<3 I'd prefer a guy but if you think any female fits better then I can be down w/ that too ;))

Getting the basics out of the way: Aries, ENFJ 2w3, Hufflepuff, Chaotic Good

I'm 5'7 with quite a big chest but a lack of ass lmao and I've got bleach blonde hair with bangs that falls just in-between shoulder and chest length. Brown eyes with long lashes (honestly still confused why they're so long now bcuz I deadass cut them off like three years ago bcuz I thought they looked too feminine?? Jokes on past me I'm Extremely stereotypicaly feminine now😽) and a dorky smile that I try to hide in pics but that just ends up with me looking like I have resting bitch face💔

I'm extremely extroverted, bubbly and kind to others with a somewhat hidden vulgar sense of humour that rly contrasts the "cute fluffy animals in sunflower fields and neverending love" vibe that I give off irl. I take on a motherly protective role with my friends (we will pretend that wasn't just bcuz trauma made me mature early luv that 4 me) and am always there to offer advice or just cute pictures/facts to take their mind off their worries!

Despite being very extroverted and people-oriented some people that don't know me may think I'm a lil shy because of my anxiety and tendancy to overthink EVERYTHING. Around my friends I try and hide my real feelings behind a super happy mask so that others can feel the joy I give off and I don't feel like a burden🏃🏃 I can also be incredibly judgemental in my head and if I know I'm right about something I will fight to the death till others acknowledge that I'm actually right.

My current biggest hobby is cooking/baking and I always make dinner every Sunday without fail (shout out 2 my roast dinners they are elite if I do say so myself😌) along with some sweet treats. I also enjoy creating cosplays because it combines my love of sewing, makeup and acting because I can completely embody my character and not have to worry about being judged because it's not Me being judged it's the character I'm portraying.

I can honestly vibe to any music but I prefer cheesy pop songs and jazz music along with assorted classical music that I listen to every night to help me sleep (I say that but some of them fr have me trying to stay awake just so I can listen to the whole song rip)

When it comes to people I tend to gravitate towards introverts because I can always make them ramble their heart out and I adore listening it's honestly my hidden talent both romantically and platonically they've said that they feel I'm trustworthy and easy to talk to (SUCH high praise like 60% of my past friends were the bookworms that Never Spoke and one of my besties now talks to me more than most of her family after only knowing eachother 2months)

Ummm fun fact abt myself I used to be obsessed with the idea of being a spy when I was a child so I wrote my entire diary in code and to this very day I can't uncode a single thing I wrote💀

Have a wonderful day I hope this is enough haha💗

I WANNA MATCH YOU UP SOOO BAD WITH MONOMA SO I’LL HECKING DO IT

Listenlistenlisten you give off strong Kendou vibes, But Better. And I mean better suited for Monoma. He’s a lot to handle, but you can definitely do it. I think your friendly demeanour and naturally approachable self is VERY convenient for him, even if he won’t say it out loud for a while.

At first you can bet he’s not THAT interested; you’re just another person, and a bubbly one at that. But then he sees how your sense of humour completely derails from your persona and his heart goes “and I oop-“

Jkjk I honestly think it takes Monoma a while to fall, but it’s an irreversible process. Like you keep his boasting and insulting in check?? When he aims it towards you, you just aim it back at him with the same silver tongue he has?? Battle of the Wits. Everyone KNOWS it’s flirting but he doesn’t. You don’t. It’s actually sort of funny.

The fact that you can befriend literally anyone? He’s Shooketh, it’s something he’s not able to do (for very good reasons), but he admires it. He totally hid his admiration through “maniacal plans” of having you befriend people from 1-A and become a spy on the inside. You did not agree to his plans and still went on to befriend Koda lmao you really said “fuck yo plans”.

And my GOD YOUR ARGUMENTATIVE SIDE. He loves it so much, he loves to trigger it, he loves to argue with you, and it’s even better because he’s a bit,, dumb dumb so he 100% thinks he’s right but you KNOW he’s wrong but he thinks he knows he’s right and the arguments go on forever and wow I guess you’re moronsexual now?? This is oddly endearing to me what the heck.

It takes so long for this boy to realize his feelings, and even longer to confess, but through it all he remains the same towards you. The only exception is after you two become a thing and he gets comfortable with you, you might be able to draw out some insecurities from him. Please help him with those he needs help

Songs!!

- Wake Up In The Sky, Gucci Maine, Bruno Mars & Kodak Black

- That’s Life, Frank Sinatra

- Fame, David Bowie (if this doesn’t give you a Monoma vibe NOTHING will-)

- Fashion, David Bowie

[handweavers]

why do u like bioshock 2 more? genuinely curious, i do think the game gets shit on 2 much but imo didnt expand upon the original in a way i (personally) enjoyed, would luv 2 hear ur thoughts

tbh i don't like the idea that games have to "reinvent the wheel" to be considered good, bc its just resulted in games constantly trying to outdo each other and focus on whatever Brand New Thing they can add to a game whether it's graphics or some new button you can press or whatever, rather than focusing on how to tell a good story and ensure a player experience that is impactful or enjoyable. like how a major draw with anthem was the jetpacks and being able to fly everywhere, which was "groundbreaking", except the actual game sucked ass and less than a year after release very few people actually play it. so i don't find it really helpful to measure a game by how original it is but by how well it was executed and the ways in which it impacted those who played it.

& from that perspective bioshock 2 is one of my favourite games, because it took the most striking parts of the original (like the setting) and created a story out of it that i found a lot more emotionally meaningful and asked philosophical questions that weren't 1) easy to answer and 2) felt more relevant and applicable to my own human experience. it ties into my central storytelling philosophy that if it doesn't center love or passion in some capacity i don't really care about it. it took bioshock's setting and elaborated more on the dehumanizing aspects of capitalism and the ways in which people will harm others for their own gain, whether financial or social or otherwise, and the abuse parents inflict on their children and call it love.

subject delta's story has stayed with me since i first played it 6? 7? years ago. bioshock 2's story of a man who was captured and violated and stuffed into this metal suit he's now completely reliant on for survival and brainwashed by some libertarian capitalist dystopia under the sea and put in charge of caring for a little girl who would be violated in similar ways by her own mother, who then murders him when she realises that her daughter and this "monster" love each other as parent and child more than her daughter loves her, who is then resurrected by the daughter when she escapes from her mother as an adult so you can help save her and other little girls from being brainwashed and abused and violated is a 100000x more impactful for me than than the story in the original bioshock, which i would argue is not a story centered around passion or love, at least not in a way that is as meaningful. it's a good story and a good game, but it hasn't stayed with me like delta's story in bioshock 2.

the entire game you're trying to find eleanor, your daughter in every way that counts, and you can choose to become the monster the capitalists tried to brainwash you into being or you can save as many people as possible. subject delta is traumatised but wholly motivated by love for his daughter. through the game you examine the ways in which capitalism dehumanizes all of us, but especially the most vulnerable in society by denying them agency, self determination, an identity. subject delta broke his programming by loving eleanor, he broke his programming to find her and he breaks his programming by defying his "creator" over and over again to do what is right. in the "good" ending, you've saved every little sister, every Actual Tiny Child, from being brainwashed and experimented on and turned into a resource harvesting machine for profit, and you've saved eleanor, and for the first time all of them have the right to self determination. you die, yes, but you sacrifice yourself for them, and you live on forever as part of eleanor and she carries what you taught her with her for the rest of her life and chooses to do good and break her own capitalist programming. she defies her mother and the years of abuse she suffered at her hands to carve her own story and do the right thing by preventing her mother from hurting other children the way she was hurt.

i love subject delta. he physically cannot speak the entire game because capitalism has literally taken away his voice, but hes still able to use his "voice" by impacting the lives of others and making the deliberate choice to do the right thing. throughout the story you begin to understand what they did to this man, who he was before, what they made him do, what they took from him, and it's so tragic and heartbreaking and painfully relevant to our current society. while the game is science fiction, everything i've mentioned is applicable to any capitalist society especially our own. capitalism doesn't want us to be motivated by love or passion, it doesn't want us to do the right thing no matter the cost, it doesn't want us take back our agency from those who oppress us, it wants us to be quiet and subservient and do as we're told because it lines the pockets of the powerful. it's an incredibly powerful story from that angle, but also to approach it as an abuse survivor. your parent might love you, but not in the way you deserve to be loved, not in the right way, and you are allowed to carve your own destiny without them.

to me, bioshock 2 is about saying "no, you do not get to decide who i am, you do not get to erase my humanity" and emphasizes something core to me: loving people and being loved by people is the greatest honour, and it makes everything else we suffer through in this life worthwhile. loving people in the right way, in a selfless way, is a holy thing, and in a world that wants us broken and yielding to stand up and fight for the people you love and do the right thing is worth it at any cost. that entire concept is central to who i am as a person, its fundamental to my perspective and the way i live my life, which is why that same narrative thread in bioshock 2 hits me like a brick, for better or for worse.

[twilightvolt]

Twilight Thoughts (BEASTARS First Season Overview + General Thoughts and Feelings)

Ok, after watching the season finale (and proceeding to freak the frig out over that after credits scene), i think i’ll just talk about my overall thoughts about this first season since i picked it up back in October. think of this as my final thoughts on the series for awhile until season 2 drops. though, i don’t think i’ll be doing something like this in particular again. we’ll see.

So, this was a series that i was a tad hesitant on looking at years ago since the art style kinda deterred me a bit. but after the anime was announced, i decided that that would be the time i give it a shot. and i gotta say, i was surprised. like, i had my hopes a little high cuz of Zootopia, but i didn’t expect ANY of the crazy stuff that happened over the course of this first season. like, none of the trailers ever showed any of Haru’s uhh....naked moments or the black market stuff (aside from Gouhin) so had i known about that, i think i might’ve quickly noped outta there. but since it came to me as it happened, i was already so invested in this strange world and it’s characters that i just dealt with it and kept going. and i think that’s something i definitely needed since if imma be honest, i haven’t watched that much anime in recent years.

Yeah, i marathoned Noragami (which i loved to bits and am sad there’s no season 3) and kept up with Boruto and My Hero for awhile last year. and i liked Fire Force and Black Clover this year. but for some reason, Beastars just.....sparked something that made me eagerly anticipate it’s new episodes every week. from beginning to end, i was hooked. not one episode felt like it wasn’t necessary or like it was padding to fill out the season (and even if it was, i like these characters so much that i honestly wouldn’t mind as explained on my meme blog). the plot twists made me genuinely shocked, the goddamn cliffhangers had me at the edge of my seat excited (and in some cases, worried but in a good way) for what was to transpire in the next episode and any preconceived notions i had going into this were just thrown out the window cuz of how things turned out by the end of it. it was such a wild ride that it actually pushed me to want to read the original material. and that almost NEVER happens.

This show got me thinkin’ like a crazy shipper too what with all those cute and crazy moments between the characters (ex. literally anyone with Legoshi) and hell, i even feel like this is the one show in existence where i actually kinda feel like an OT3 is very much plausible. lmao

Like, i’m a very emotional person when it comes to consuming media. i let myself feel what’s going on no matter what i watch/play because i know that’s what the people who created these stories would want me to experience. and trust me, i’ve felt a LOT of emotions during this show. especially if anything happened to Legoshi. like, when he gets pissed, i felt worried about him. when he cries, i genuinely feel the pain he feels and wish that things would just lighten up on him for once. like, with most protagonists, i tend to end up moving to a different character cuz usually they’re just written pretty basically (Asta from Black Clover), they’re one note (Davis from Digimon 02) or they’re silent protagonists being molded by the player’s choices (the Persona protags). for example, i like Sora from Kingdom Hearts, but i luv Roxas much more because of his story and all the pain he goes through because of Sora. also Sora in KH3D was such a dumbass and i’m sdadfdfsdf

But with Legoshi, i don’t get that. i get a Roxas tier character that i want so bad to see get a happy ending. i get a protagonist that i would actually choose over the other members of the cast (even though i absolutely luv Louis, Jack and Haru as well for various reasons. hell, it’s hard to even say i hate Juno cuz despite her Rise-level attempts to get into Legoshi’s pants, she has respectable ambitions.) that grows from this socially awkward guy who’d rather keep things lowkey to this badass that would fight through a gang of lions just to show the one he cares about how much he wants be with her and to make amends for almost killing her the night they met and that just hits me in the heart in a way i am totally here for.

Now, over the course of this season’s run, i’ve been making a ton of fanart (some of which is still in the works at the time of this post) and for the first time, i’ve been liveblogging like this. i’m happy that my time in the fandom for this series, while still growing, has so far been a very welcoming experience. everyone i’ve met so far has been encouraging of my content and, coming from fandoms like Digimon where i’ve kinda been scarred by Deviantart discourse, it’s really brought up my spirits. like, i know a lot of you probably don’t like and/or care about reading these walls of text, but i appreciate anyone who does take the time to hear me ramble about this strange gem of a show. hell, me talking and drawing about it has gotten a few of my friends to watch it and honestly, i’m glad. i would totally love more people to talk about it cuz Beastars deserves to be talked about. under all those slightly sexual undertones lies some of the best writing i’ve seen in awhile and i can’t wait for season 2 to continue this story.

And after all this, i just wanted to thank you for reading up to this point. again, this’ll probably be the last liveblog for awhile, but i definitely won’t stop drawing stuff for this series. for those who only follow me for my Beastars stuff, i hope you’ve had a happy holidays and i hope you have a happy new year as well.

See you again! ^  ^

[unspecifiederror]

hi friend

you. Are crying beside a bed that you will not be sleeping in in a month or less, bc again we're back to this life changing, choice making, choosing your next chapter in this game called life era. You is graduating, im listening to weird tiktok disco song rn, i would change the song but the wifi sucks even this song took 4747 minutes to open, im listening to it bc i waited

okay now im changing

the song was...

try 2 luv by never dull

turned a rennie bottle upside down, waiting for it to fill up the bottle cap so i can drink the remaining stomach soothing drink, cause here i am again with stomach pain

also my nose hurts, the piercing, i shouldn't have changed it that often, it's having hard time trying to heal

i wanna live happily but i dont wanna be bored, 4 years ago me, how was she

i have become,,, okay lets make pros cons of what kind of a person i am

pros:

-i am problem solver

-i can mend stuff

-i am good at digital drawing

-i am good at making mixed media art

-i have good eye for things(things i like are reallY good

-i can draw great eyeliners

-i love cats

-i love listening to music and break down beats, i believe i will make a song

-i am good at wandering around, i can walk 4848km and still not get that tired, tired yes but it's fun so im okay with wandering around

-i am good at cutting bangs

-i can braid hair

-i can make paper crane

-i can do collage

-i can do superb powerpoint presentations

-i am good at decorating

cons:

-im procrastinating

-i live trying to met expectations of others so ive lost myself in the process

-i dont like people(this is not as dramatic as it sounds but you literally don't like everyone, even you like someone you end up finding and ick of them so

-its hard for me to really like someone to hang out with

-i like hanging out with people, but i feel weird, idk(will elaborate

-i look like i feel bad, i have rested bitch face, i look like im too uncomfortable

-im late, to most occasions

anyways

enough of that

lets drink stomache sooth stuff

i need to pee

there are infinite possibilities that comes from my decisions

maybe something i did today hindered me from meeting my soulmate

or made me 1 step closer to him

i dont know

i shouldn't think about it that much

im literally in shock that, i was graduating from high school yesterday and now

im grraduating from university

and it's

it's all gonna be okay

i will end up okay

and finish my license

and i will be happy

i will be happy

bye for now

much love

[dangerliesbeforeyou]

5 YEARS WITH BTS (aka bangtan sonyeondan aka beyond the scene aka bangtan boys and bulletproof boy scouts aka b- let’s... let’s just call them bts lol) - A WAY TOO LONG POST ABOUT 1 GIRL’S LOVE FOR 7 DORKS

So I’m just gonna begin this by saying how proud of everything BTS has achieved, not just in the past year or so but in all 5 years they’ve been blessing us with their music...

Second thing I wanna say is that this post is LONG so.... I’m inserting a read more encase anyone aside from me from the future wants to read my rambles about a group of 7 dorks who stole my heart lol...

I discovered them roughly in the early to middle part of 2014, Boy in Luv being the first song I heard of theirs (Ithink... my memory’s kinda hazy lol) & I remember really liking the song (wasn’t as keen on the mv but yeah...)

(I also listened to Bulletproof pt 2 & No More Dream at some point & I really liked them... idk when that was but... yeah... I also vividly remember laughing at the No More Dream mv where RM’s introducing the members and he says Jungkook’s name really quickly at the end? As if he’d run out of space in the intro to fit his name in lol... like ‘shit i only have a second to fit Jungkook in quick gotta say his name real fast’ lol... maybe I’m the only one that finds that funny idk ANyWAy back to the story)...

Fast forward to August 2014 when Danger & the Dark and Wild album were realised, and lemme tell you how that Blew. My. Mind.

Danger was really unlike anything I’d heard in k-pop at the time... I loooooved the grungy/rock vibes mixed with hip hop, which perfectly matched the dark mv & aggressive but sharp dance moves... I just remember thinking ‘wow, these guys are really gonna go far if they keep this up’ (or something like that, guys it was 4 years ago I can barely remember what I was thinking 4 seconds ago let alone anything else lol)

Also, at that point in time I’d heard a lot of great k-pop albums (XOXO by EXO, Crush by 2NE1, Overdose (mini album) by EXO, Red Light by f(x), Mama (mini album) by EXO, etc etc) but genuinely, I was so impressed by this album, & immediately downloaded it despite knowing little to nothing about the group (only things I knew were that one of the members was called V, which i found hilarious lol) just because the music and the entire layout of the album was so brilliantly done!

(would like to mention at this point that my favourite tracks from Dark & Wild were Look Here, Rain and Let Me Know... 3 songs that are still some of my fav BTS songs tbh)

Fast forward again to 2015, maybe near the beginning? where I still didn’t know the members names (well, I knew Rap Mon (who could forget), V and I think I knew Suga... I was following a few blogs who were armies & they’d often use the members actual names so I was constantly like ‘WHO IS THIS YOONGI YOU SPEAK OF WHAT IS A YOONGI’ lol)... tbh idk when that changed, but at some point in 2015 I decided to sell my soul to BTS & officially became an army...

(i was technically a fan of them before, but I hadn’t dedicated much of my life to them at that point u know? there’s a fine line between ‘moderately like a thing’ and ‘SUDDENLY MY REASON TO BREATHE IS THIS THING’... & that line took about a year to cross in this case lol)

Fast forward (we’re fast forwarding to the interesting bits, since most of the rest of my actual life was really boring or really depressing lol...) to about August 2015 & we have my first artwork of BTS &, surprise surprise it’s of Jimin... (based on the Dope teaser pictures cos red haired jimin will always be legendary lbr)...

Anyway, you always know you’re gone for a group or artist when you start doing fanart, so through 2015 I probably did another 2? fanarts of Jimin & one of Taehyung (I also think I tried to draw Jungkook at one point but failed lol...)... The real Problem(tm) started in 2016.

I started the year with a Jimin fanart, and then went on to start a BTS series based on my fav songs by them... and then proceeded to not finish said series lol (story of my life)... BUT, in April of 2016 I did manage to finish a BTS series, based on the Young Forever mv (& the whole concept of that era) which I’m actually still proud of tbh...

Anyway, so 2016 was when I realised that I really like drawing Jimin... like...a lot.... & then 2017 I just continued that up until now (currently 12 of June 2018) I have drawn him 63 times, not counting traditional drawings or random sketches I’ve done..... I have a serious problem I know

Throughout that time I also made about 5 other BTS series (2 of which are based on the Wings solo tracks because they are the GREATEST tbh), as well as countless solo member (or duo member) artworks... so far I’m at about 140, but to be honest that will never be enough to express how much I love these guys... Unfortunately, as a fanartist, my art is really all I can do to express that love so... Cheers to another 140 eh?

So... what’s my point in writing this? Other than the fact I’m really bored & just felt like it?

Well, to be honest, I’m not gonna say that I’d be a shell of a person without them in my life or anything... I think I probably could’ve had an alright life if I had never decided to make my life’s work to draw Jimin at least 200 times before I die... In fact, maybe I’d be a more productive person? Maybe I’d socialise more or maybe I’d stop procrastinating revision so much idk... 

Regardless of those facts, BTS have given me so much inspiration, not just in my art exploits, but also in my own far off, completely unattainable dreams of becoming some kind of musician in the future... 

Music has always been an important part of my life (I actually gave up learning music academically because it clashed with German lessons... I gave up music for culture... now look at me... Ich bin sehr doof, ja?) but I never considered I’d be able to pursue it as more than just a part time hobby... Enter BTS, with their wide eyed determination and optimism, with their talk of dreams and working hard to achieve what you want in life... 

A group of crazy boys, with equally crazy personalities, with a mish-mash bag of talents, who came together in a small company, in a time when k-pop was becoming more and more competitive... And they just came out and did what they loved, they were unashamed to sing and rap about the issues they’d gone through, issues in their own culture and society, they sang about their passions and their loves, they sang about their regrets and the times when they felt hopeless... They’re completely honest, they make mistakes, they have flaws, but they’re proof that people can change and become better people when they’re educated about certain things! 

They’re not perfect, but that’s the point... 

They’re just us, a group of ordinary people who had a couple dreams, and tried their god damn hardest to reach those dreams.... And if I can live my life with even half of that level of enthusiasm and dedication, I know I’ll go far...

Thank you so so much BTS for making me consider new paths that my life may go, for not just settling with the comfortable or the mundane, for striving for something more, for something actually exciting... 

You’ll never know what you mean to me, or to any of army, but I will forever be grateful for the impact you unknowingly made on my life... 

[homuncolossus-a]

@Homuncolossus’ Forever Follow !

Author’s Note: Ayyyeeeee. We’ve done it, folks! Well, I’ve done it but at the end it’s a shared success, isn’t it? That’s suprising since I did abandoned this blog several times. It was mostly dead and I had no determination to write it for .. 5 months? 1 year? I honestly don’t know how long. This blog was created about 3 years ago, then the URL had changed and eventually it died due to lack of interactions. Soon after I started to really miss the Beast as my Muse and decided to look for fandoms myself. AAAAAAND here I am. You probably won’t believe how hard it is to actually roleplay within the fandom. I got dumped by other Beast blog (can you believe?), and all the character’s I’ve been roleplaying went afk about month after interacting with me. A dang curse, ain’t it? But long story short, during maintaining my beloved Muse I’ve met A LOT of interesting people and I just MUST call you out here! :D

@elemental-bartender/@twisted-wanderer We’ve get to know each other in the most weird possible - through a stupid meme and kinda fell for each other?? WTF. WHat  we gonna tell our kids?? “YOU KNOW, THAT ONE TIME ME AND YOUR MOM HAD ROLEPLAYING BLOGS ON TUMBLR AND IT ALL STARTED THROUGH A YAOI BETWEEN US. SHE DREW OUR TREE CHARACTERS SHARING AN AWKWARD KISS AND IT JUST MADE MY BONER FLY” THING? But srsly, you are sweetheart and the best boyfriend. Mwah! Thank you for motivating and supporting me and my awful ideas!

@daughterofthewoodsman /@hishap I love your Anna? And I still luv her? Shame you are not roleplaying her anymore. Roleplaying with you helped me with most of my headcanons and kinda miss ya? ;;

@tantibus-aeternam Oh boi, here we go. Here I gotta say u really helped me out too with interactions. You were a good senpai. Quite a shame we’ve stopped talking. Alright, I have been annoying and such, I get it. That’s why I’m taking my distance and avoid pissing you more? Kinda? Still, wanted to thank you 4 dealing with my immature attitude, bad quality drawings and being nice to me!

@doctor-flugg / @byt3-and-barq CAN YOU BELIEVE YOU ON MY PHONE YOU ARE MOST POPULAR TAG? I have more posts with you than IC posts?? That’s a madness, I know! But honestly, we both can believe it. Without our interactions I kinda had nothing to make me stay on this blog ya know? ;; It was not the same without U. Maybe one pretty day you shall think about this post. YES, YES, THIS POST RIGHT HERE, and bother my Beast again? NO PRESSURE THO. Just saying, I’m still considering you one of my precious rp partners.

@curioosity/ @snackiies WELL, WELL, WELL. WELL.. WELL. WELL, WELL, WELL! Here we are, Zuzu! It’s you well deserved place in my follow forever. I’ve been stalking you from 2 blogs (mostly from the other when I had abandoned this one) and I’d be dumb to not include you here. Reading your posts really gets to me, and I know you are struggling with lots of shit but I’d like to tell you - You are great. You are doing great and each time I see you posting a piece of artwork I stare at it and I’m glad to call you my friend. I hope some of my posts or interactions are cheering you up a bit, because you deserve to be happy and have a happy life. <3

@blxndspxctcr / @toon-artist AAAAAND HERE’S MY ABBY. You’re tagged here because our Muses are big dorks and each shenanigans we write the gayness GROWS STRONGER. For reals now, you are a great and funny and sunny person to have around. Please, don’t take personally some things I say, I am a human and sometimes have a bad mood too. ;; If ive ever sounded mean, I am very sorry to cause you worry or sadness.

@akunoakuma / @unspeakablyevil / @aku-blogs TRiple thanks to the three of you for dealing with my tree boi and for all the shenanigans wrote. Our roleplays really did make me enjoy this blog and honestly, for you I am always open for more interactions!

@ink-imp AND A BIT SHOT OUT TO YOU, OLD FRIEND. YOU THOUGHT I FORGOT ABOUT YOU? NAHNAHNAH. I NEVER FORGET. YOU TOO ARE A SUPER-DUPER-HYPER ROLEPLAYER I’VE HAD A HONOR TO TALK TO AND LAUGH WITH.

Can’t really abuse this post for long so here’s my list of awesome people whom I love and never kick off my swamp. 

@evilpersonified @txtaldomination @goldendorito @florallyfurious @the-gods-of-metal @starryeyedself @eldritchwreckage @drangcd @demoncia @the-one-and-only-aku @doctor-flxg @lrper @hinkwerks @drewgod (u r here because i stalk you) @thetrueends @vermilion-bloom @kangi97 @samuraiprince @sonxflight @recdrflxg @earlxfphantomhive @pine-dexter @showmedeath @hornedheathen @possessedmaiden @the-everchild @bolotiesandjournals @akusmostfavoritesexmachine @trefoliium @inkcrowned @huntressthewizard @ofomniiscience @candle-hair @whiteswxrm @hook-and-chains @maybeicanfixit @lanternslowlight @ask-frozen-nocturne @ask-fran-bow @chaotic--purity @overworkedscientist

[youhave1newmessage]

I hope you’re happy with yourself anon. This ask had ME STRESSED. Have you ever seen those women with a bunch of children around them and even though they only have two arms, it almost appears like they have six?

Yeah. That was ME.

So prepare yourself. You’re in for a one HECK of a response. 

For the sake of everyone that will be seeing this post around their dashboard, or on whatever tag you’re on, I’m putting a “Keep Reading” thing because dear mother of Neptune, this post is LONG.

If what you’re about to read doesn’t satisfy your thirst, we have an about us post! There you’ll see in more detail (and MUCH less writing) just exactly what groups we bias and who we bias.

-  Admin  🍌

Admin  🍌

I love being recognized as, “The one that stans Yongguk” because yaaaasss, that means I’m doing my JOB RIGHT. Now, WHY I bias the man, that’s a legit good question...Why DO I bias Yongguk? I actually used to bias Junhong (I still love the kid though, trust.) I actually used to think the COMPLETE opposite of Yongguk; I literally called him some things I feel horrible about and I would say he was scary looking and how could one ever like him. What I didn’t know was Yongguk was sneaking up on me slowly until he suddenly went on his hiatus. I had done this little tribute thing for him of having him on my phone and I kept telling myself that after his hiatus, I would put my biases back on my wallpaper but it just...never happened? xD I just slowly fell for him and the guy wormed his way into my heart and became my ultimate bias. He’s the guy I always say is the only one I would ever truly marry haha thanks for asking this! I wish we got more questions like this. Maybe we’ll do a text post like this soon! :)

Admin 🔞

Trust me, the noona life chose me…  haha see, I remember the first BTS video I ever saw and my boy was a cop! Yup this is “Dope” we are talking about.  As you can imagine my noona heart could not contain the kookie attraction. I tried really hard to not choose kookie as my bias. In my early days I even switched between Kookie and Jin (it’s become a running joke now, until Kookie was an “adult” I actually had 2 biases and I would average out the ages hahaha) Kookie was always my number 1 though! As I was trying to decide if Kookie was indeed my bias, I came upon a gem on youtube: Jungkook vs Kookie search that up and you’ll see how he finally won my heart. It was his personality! He is so shy and goofy all at once, and he’s so kind and I am just crazy about him! He stole my heart and he will forever be the only maknae that makes my knees weak!

Admin 🦀

It all started many years ago, when a friend of mine showed me a music video of BTS. I believe the first one was Bulletproof and I wasn't into it whatsoever. But then, the next one she showed me was Boy In Luv and I didn't like it much at first, but I was very fascinated by the blond hottie. I later found out his name was Rap Monster (RM now) and it was a downward spiral from there. I watched all of their Bangtan Bombs and looked up Namjoon’s covers and tracks he had released when he was basically a fetus *cough* expensive girl *cough*. I used to be, as some would say, a kpoppin hoe because I was always jumping from bias to bias. But guys, I kid you not, I have stayed loyal to my bias. I can never love no other lol. He’s just a piece of art! His deep voice, his dorkiness, his intellect, the way he speaks english, HIS DIMPLES!  I love that he has such a beautiful heart and that he’s such a great leader. I love everything about him! Even the way he dances lol. Gosh… I’m getting emotional now… Every time I see or hear this man, I literally hyperventilate and cry. The other admins are witnesses. I’m crazy for this man! I would like to say more but I will literally talk nonstop if I don’t pause now. 👋

Admin 🍓

J-Hope hands down. I just admire him so much. He is everything I wish to be as a human being. Funny story is, when I was first introduced to BTS I told a friend of mine “For sure I'm not going to bias him. I have enough hyperactive energy from T.O.P.”  Life is funny that way and now I wouldn't have it any other way. 😘

Admin 🍇 

If I really sit down to think about it, there are many reasons as to why Namjoon is my bias, I mean what isn’t there to love about him?! Firstly, Namjoon is a wonderful leader. He’s able to care for six other boys and able to complete his duties as a leader, while at the same time always taking into account all the other members’ opinions and never making it seem like he’s above them. Namjoon is one of the most intelligent people I have ever come across and he seems like the type of person you can talk to for hours without feeling bored. He has this way of making everything sound interesting and I love how in interviews he always shares way too much information when you ask him about a topic, it’s so adorable. I love that even though he’s extremely busy he manages to make time to appreciate the little things in life (nature) and even draws inspiration from them! All in all Namjoon is far from perfect and that’s what makes me love him so much. It may seem ironic and somewhat contradictory, but it’s true. Throughout his career he has struggled a lot, has had many scandals, and has made many mistakes,  but he has learned from it all and has grown as a person. I love that I've had the opportunity to be a part of this, and I hope to continue to be able to do so!

Admin🍍

Weelllll  at first I was not that into RM because in the Dope MV he looked like a little f-boii but i was completely wrong. His dorky and philosophical self just creeped up into my heart and nestled there for a good while. Now I have discovered MONSTA X and my heart is shaking again. I don't understand this thing i have for weird/dorky rappers with deep voices, but freaking Im Changkyun is creeping up and is neck to neck with RM. Stay tuned to see what happens next!

Admin 🍑 

Wellll if we’re going down memory lane...I’m kind of new to KPOP so when I discovered Got7’s Just Right about a year or two ago I immediately jumped on the Jaebum wagon. I was a goner for I’d say a good month or so. But then Jinyoung happened lol. You see I didn’t pay too much attention to him and I’m not really sure how I didn’t considering the fact that I did think the group was really cute and funny. But when I finally noticed him it was in the Stop it Stop it mv and I just lost it after. I’m pretty sure it was his voice that got to me first almost as if my heart was being tugged at each time I heard him sing so I was practically already in danger. Then all it took was for me to watch If you do and I was done for, completely loving that beautiful human being. I love love his smile like I can’t get enough of it anytime I see him smile I’m just pudding and when he laughs and his eyes crinkle it’s the best thing ever. Like I live for the times that I’m able to see him laugh wholeheartedly. I also love the fact that he loves reading (as I’m a book lover myself). I also can’t help but love that little mischievous side that he brings out when he’s having fun it’s the best thing ever. Oh and one crucial point I..Love..His..Peach, when I tell you that his peach is my top fave I MEAN IT. I’d say more but then it would probably come out to be an essay 😅.

Admin 🐣 

Originally my bias was Hwasa because. She’s. Beautiful. And her voice is amazing. But then my best friend actually showed me one of their music videos and I saw one of the idols (I didn’t know any of their names at the time lol) squish her face against the camera screen at that moment Solar became my bias. 

[somedayking-a]

some raised antari au for @oflegendaries bc i luv 2 suffer

it happens quickly, the way it always does.  one day, there’s vortalis and holland ; the next, there’s astrid and athos dane.  and holland.  they don’t kill him, which would strike holland as a stupid move if he wasn’t bound and chained and utterly unable to call on the magic that has always been there ever since alox held a knife to his throat and holland shattered him in stone across the floor.  this magic is mine, he’d said.  it’s still his, still there, but it doesn’t come when he reaches for it, bound somewhere in the dark.  in london, those seeking power kill to take it, but the danes are clever.  they are good, holland learns, at taking power and keeping it, holding it close, hovering somewhere between dead and alive.  those standing in their way, they kill ; but the strongest power, the biggest threats, those they string up and dangle at arm’s length.  

there are two ways holland’s power stops being a threat: they kill him, or they control his magic themselves.  there’s only so much power you can take from a dead man, bleeding him dry until you’re left with a corpse icing over in the palace courtyard.  but a man in chains, brimming with potential he’s unable to use, bound to obey another’s word - that man still has limits but the danes know how to hold the balance, keeping him alive and taking everything by force.

so between one visit and another, grey london to red to white, holland stops being a knight and instead becomes a slave.  it’s a subtle change, from a distance.  not many have ever been close enough to see it.  astrid and athos delight in it.  london goes on as it always has, spilling blood for blood and power that will never be enough.  somewhere in the middle of it all, the grey london antari ascends the palace steps.  

“come,” says athos, voice smooth as silk, turning holland’s stomach. “show our visitor in.”

he does.

surely lila can see the difference, must know it the second she sets eyes on him.  small girl, young, too clever and perceptive by half ; holland wonders if the king would have sent her had he known vortalis no longer sits on the throne, known who he was sending lila to.  the magic-less crown covets its antari like a prize, and its communications with red london and his.  holland doesn’t think they would be so eager to throw it away.  

but george iii can’t know yet, because holland hasn’t set foot in lila’s london in months, communication almost to a standstill.  if that had worried lila before, she doesn’t show it.  she doesn’t show worry now, if she feels it, but waits until she reaches the top of the steps before saying “you look like hell.”  

she’s not expecting to see him.  it’s been years since holland and vortalis gave up on trying to escort the foreign ambassador where she’s supposed to go.  lila has, since her first visit, developed a habit of appearing unannounced and unseen, something holland suspects initially had more to do with not knowing where one spot in her own london led to in his than a show of independence -- but that, too.  astrid and athos won’t take kindly to it.  they don’t take kindly to anything, but anything beyond their control is taken there by force, inexperienced antari child or not.  i don’t trust things, astrid sometimes tells him, unless they belong to me.  better lila should be escorted as a visitor than masquerading as an equal.

“where’s vortalis?” she asks, brusque and too perceptive still.

holland inclines his head. “dead.”

dead with twin sadists on the throne, which holland is wise enough not to say out loud.  the king and queen have made a point of being in the hall together, whether to intimidate or merely from horrible curiosity at this familiar magic from another world, he isn’t sure.  so young, he can almost hear astrid’s whisper on the air, though she hasn’t spoken.  unmarked.  untested.  and athos, their voices like an eddy in holland’s mind: i wonder how far she bends before she breaks.  

pushing the thoughts from his mind, the white london antari takes his place in the shadows.  

trains his eyes on the far wall, not on the exchange taking place in the middle of the room.  holland’s awfully good at disappearing, for as long as the danes will allow.  lila can find him, though.  she’s had months of practice, sharp gaze to rival his own.  her eyes keep flicking to him even as the king is talking, as the queen toys idly with an empty glass.

the light dances wickedly off the surface, and despite his best efforts, holland sees it, like he’s supposed to.  no, he thinks, not tonight, letting none of it show on his face.  eyes on the wall, eyes on the wall, eyes on the wall--

“come here.”

the wave of athos’ hand is lazy, but the command is undeniable.  good at hiding for as long as the king will let him.  holland walks forwards, silent footsteps that could have marked a predator, but the predators sit upon the throne.  in the danes’ london, shadows and silence only ever mark prey.

“holland,” athos begins, turning his head only slightly.  if holland had less practice with masks, keeping fear and pain and weakness at bay, he would shiver.  the king rarely addresses him by name ; the fact that it’s for lila’s benefit escapes nobody. “kneel.”

that’s when he knows, for certain, that astrid and athos saw her looking.  he didn’t expect them not to.  people only make the mistake of taking their gaze from the king and queen once.  they’re good at finding power, holding it close, twisting it, and athos has just found where to point the knife.  he is about to make a display of it.  

it’s entertainment and a show of power.  which antari they’re trying to impress this on, holland isn’t sure.  it serves for them both.

holland kneels.

he doesn’t cry out when athos takes a fistful of dark hair and yanks back, forcing his eyes to the ceiling.  astrid presses a knife into his hand, and he doesn’t push her away.  every nerve in his body is singing danger, every muscle tensed to flee from being so close.  he won’t flee, of course.  he’ll do exactly as he’s told.

no-one suffers as beautifully as you.

don’t stop don’t think don’t fight don’t resist just do--

he raises the edge of cool metal to his throat ( athos’ voice never raising to a shout, doesn’t have to, holland is bound to obey a whisper if it pleases ) and draws blood.  it’s not deep - athos isn’t trying to kill him, isn’t even trying to leave a scar, and that should be worse because it means he’s in no hurry.  a hundred ways to make holland suffer before the sun sets and he’s only beginning.

“give me the knife,” says astrid, and as he holds it out, his eyes drop just enough to catch lila.  paler than she was a moment ago, hands balled into fists, she takes one step forward and then another.  holland can’t say anything, isn’t stupid enough for that, but he can feel the danes watching her ( astrid running a finger along the flat of the blade, bringing blood to her lips like paint ), wanting her to try.  

he meets her eyes, narrowing his own just enough to say don’t.  for a minute, he thinks she will anyway.  it’s a look she’s seen from him a hundred times before, with less at stake, one she’s dismissed as many times as followed.  but she pauses, and athos lets go of his hair, pushing him forward, and by the time holland’s righted himself, lila still hasn’t moved.  she’s staring at the king and queen as if imagining how their bones would look as finely-carved pieces of jewellery, and surely they can see, but she hasn’t moved.  

astrid only gives her a cool look. “you know your way home.”

run along there.  

“i rather want to play with that one,” she says, when lila is gone. “shall we have her back, brother?”

“another time,” says athos, and his eyes drift, properly now, to holland. “as for you--”

( they see.  

they saw.

it’s the first time athos reapplies the curse, in the event you feel your loyalties wavering, and it hurts as badly as the first time all those months ago, as deeply as it will every time for the next seven years.  

i will kill you one day, holland thinks, and keeps his face as blank as he knows how through the bone-deep terror and the pain.  i will have you suffer. )

the next time lila comes back, holland doesn’t meet her eyes, watches somewhere a careful amount behind her. “athos or astrid?”

“astrid,” lila says, lips twisting into something grim. “i hope you’ll tell the king i haven’t forgotten him.”

the words sound too much like a warning, like a challenge - it’s another seven years before holland will see it met.

[fiftythousandgreenbacks]

behind the scenes tag thing

this is for @threejerseyboys

coffee: what’s your coffee order?

ooooh recently cold brew coffee is my shit. Cold brew coffee and heavy cream together is so tasty and pretentious I love it

cypher pt. 1: if you had to be part of a kpop group, what position would you want to be (i.e. leader, visual, lead vocal, dancer, rapper, maknae, etc.)

a maknae. Im the youngest of my family and I can’t do shit without other ppl taking care of me and doting on me so :) I can just be cute instead

boy in luv: when you are interested in someone (romantically, sexually, etc.), does your behavior change?

Sadly yes. I mean that’s what happens to everyone. If you think your behavior doesn’t change when you caught feelings, you’re lying t yourself hunny! I know because I’ve done the same, hunny! Not that it’s bad, but it’s also not always good either. 

just one day: who would you want to spend the last day of your life with?

My mom, since she was the one I spent my first day of my life with technically? May as well end things in full circle? Why am I sounding really casual

tomorrow: goal that you would like to achieve within the next year?

Don’t die, juggle a lot of responsibilities successfully without being a wreck, keep my emotions in check, get a goddamn research position in college, be chill

miss right: what is your ideal ‘type’?

I don’t really know right now tbh. But my heart always has a place for jk. So I guess as close to jk as possible. sweet. smol but strong. meme. weird as fuck. stupid but also smart n hardworking.

hip hop lover: three songs that are meaningful to you?

This varies every 5 minutes but for now, it’s...

Doves in the Wind by SZA. Whenever I catch myself in negative thoughts, I need to listen to this to remind myself of my self worth and whatnot.

First Love/late Spring by Mitski. I loooooove her so much i’m seeing her in october and her songwriting is so impeccable it hurts me and her voice is so ahh

Winter by Khalid. I’m seeing him tomorrow! And I’m going to cry if he does sing this!

24/7 = heaven: what are you most looking forward to?

Crying when Khalid sings! And meeting him! I’m gonna tell him about my depression! And it’s gonna be a moment!

move: last time you cried?

At my friends house and I was in a sad emotional state. I think she cried at one point too. Good times! Love hanging out with my friends!

butterfly: most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen?

Myself bitch. Jk too, especially when he performed in those weird hockey outfits and he had weird crimped hair that was flouncy

young forever: what is one movie from your childhood that you will always treasure?

To be honest? The shrek series. And this ain’t me being a meme. I genuinely loved it so much when I was a kid and I still thing it’s an excellent and funny and great and quality movie. Literally, name a better kid’s movie with kid’s humor that’s still clever and can appeal to anyone.

boys with fun: you’re going on a roadtrip with seven other people– dead, alive, fictional, real, famous, or not. who are they, and why?

I mean the obvious answer is bts. And I mean. It’s obvious for a reason. Since. It’s right. I don’t have the mental capacity to be creative and think of anything else. 

whalien 52: weirdest dream you’ve ever had?

Excluding all the sad terrible ones involving me or my friends and family dying, there was one dream where i went thru a bunch of alternate universes whilst being chased by a shadowy figure. A Wrinkle in Time style adventure, but with a less cool main character

house of cards: when was the last time you felt sexy?

0 seconds ago bitch I feel sexy rn

begin: who are you most grateful for in your life?

I’ll exclude my family since that’s too basic. I’ll say recently I’ve been really grateful for my roommate because she’s been like the main reason of my college experience turning out okay so far. Like, through her I was able to meet a lot of great people and she let me stay over her house during spring break, and she’s like simultaneously my older sister who keeps my messy ass in check and also a puppy that licks your face too much. 

lie: biggest fear?

Losing my friends. There’s a lot of things I’d rather suffer through than lose my friends. Especially the ones I’ve made in high school, because I’m so far away from them most of the year. 

reflection: if you could tell your past self one thing, what would it be?

If you think you’re ace and you don’t catch feelings and you’re above men, you wrong bitch. Unfortunate. 

cypher pt. 4: what do you do to treat yourself or relax?

Listen to music and read my old weeb drawings and diary entries and remember I’ve come so far since middle school

2!3!: your favorite thing about bangtan?

This can probably be applicable to any hardworking kpop group I guess but I really really admire their work ethic and the quality shit they put out every time. Like, their music is so well produced and written and performed and they’re just nonstop on the grind and even with all the success they’re getting, they don’t let it get to their heads with how chill their personalities still are. I love the emphasis on friendship and teamwork they push in their songs and concepts, and truly deserve all the success and hype they’re getting. They really started from humble beginnings and seeing how much they’ve grown and changed is really inspiring too. 

not today: what are your procrastinating right now?

I need to write a news brief about a lawsuit, I need to get a job/volunteer position, I need to clean my room, I need to clean my emotions...a lot

you never walk alone: how many people do you trust with your life?

Ten exactly. for now.

[bravado-raven]

Get To Know Me

Tagged by the magnificent @itana-007, Thank you so much for tagging me :D. I apologise for not doing these sooner tumblr isnt giving me damn notifications =P.

Rules: Answer these 92 statements and tag however many people you want!

THE LAST: 1. Drink: Water 2. Phone call: IRL friend Ash 3. Text message: @haikyuukazoo 4. Song you listened to: It Has Begun ~ Starset 5. Time you cried: 2 hrs ago, lmao.

HAVE YOU: 6. Dated someone twice: Nup 7. Kissed someone and regretted it: Nope 8. Been cheated on: Nah 9. Lost someone special: Definitely 10. Been depressed: Absolutely 11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: Not legally allowed to drink =P

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLOURS: 12-14: Today i’m feeling Turquoise, Brown and Olive

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU: 15. Made new friends: Online, Yeah. IRL, lmao who’d wanna talk to this nerd. 16. Fallen out of love: Not sure i truely know what love is. 17. Laughed until you cried: Of course! 18. Found out someone was talking about you: Negative 19. Met someone who changed you: I’ve met ppl who i never want to be like so yeah? i guess? 20. Found out who your friends are: Uh.. i always knew who they were... they are them, weird and unique as they are. 21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: HA let’s just stop this at I’ve never kissed someone before.

GENERAL: 22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: All of em. 23. Do you have any pets: YA :D 24. Do you want to change your name: Never 25. What did you do for your last Birthday: Celebrated it in Japan with my friends. 26. What time did you wake up: 4:05am 27. What were you doing at midnight last night: Probably reading fanfiction 28. Name something you can’t wait for: The sweet release of death? uhh well my friends just organised another hang out so probably that cause i haven’t seen them in what feels like a month. 29. When was the last time you saw your mom: 3 mins ago 30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: My fitness level. 31. What are you listening right now: My dad teaching my baby brother about pumpkins. 32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: XD Yeah, he’s in my Chem and Physics and has the same will to live as I do. Man what a meme. 33. Something that is getting on your nerves: Dad 34. Most visited Website: Tumblr, Youtube and Netflix cause i have no life...

LOST QUESTIONS. I JUST PUT IN RANDOM INFO ABOUT ME (Lmaooo) 35. Mole/s: Everywhere, like there are some old friends and some im like ... where u always there?? 36. Mark/s: I mean i always accidentally draw on myself cause im reckless. 37. Childhood dream: I wanted to be a singer which was crushed by my dad telling me i’m not good enough, then i wanted to be a scientist. 38. Hair Colour: Black 39. Long or short hair: Short, I love short hair, though i have no idea what suits me. like i look bad in both but in short I look a little less bad? 40. Do you have a crush on someone: I’m confused... idk if it’s a crush, or if it’s the desire for platonic friendship. (most likely the latter cause im about as romantic as a rag covered in moulded melted cheese) (KITA WTF) 41. What do you like about yourself: Uh.............. 42. Piercings: Nay 43. Bloodtype: O Positive, (at least some aspect of my life is positive) (kita no) 44. Nickname: Niki or Kita 45. Relationship status: Single 46. Zodiac: Capricor 47. Pronouns: Don’t really care for pronouns, call me whatever as long as it isnt mean, then i’ll fite u (pls no) 48. Favorite TV Show: OF ALL TIME, FOREVER WILL BE A:TLA 49. Tattoos: I would love some, but im not sure what of. 50. Right or left hand: Right 51. Surgery: Nada 52. Hair dyed in different colour:  Nein, i’d love like subtle steaks or surprise rainbow fish under but yeah, i like my hair colour. 53. Sport: I was gonna put *runs away* but i know i can’t even do that. 55. Vacation: Take me away, idec where, Surprise trips are great. 56. Pair of trainers: What does this even mean?

MORE GENERAL: 57. Eating: A *uncrumples packet* Carman’s Original, Fruit Free, Museli bar. 58. Drinking: Nothin rn. 59. I’m about to: Probably binge youtube OR start my Chem homework. 61. Waiting for: a reason to live Something to genuinely smile or laugh at. 62. Want: mental stability?  63. Get married: At this moment in time don’t think so. 64. Career: I have no clue, I wanted to go into medicine but dad said there’s no point cause i probs wont get in and it’s really hard (Thanks dad). at the moment i want any career that allows me to directly help other people (which was why i wanted to go into medicine and help those with terminal illnesses)

WHICH IS BETTER 65. Hugs or kisses: SHORT STORY TIME! So my family isnt a very... intimate? emotional? family. We do hug each other but it’s more like pats on the back, we do not kiss each other and don’t say “I love you” very often and that’s fine, cause it means that when we do, it carries a lot more with it. Now I FEAR kisses and saying the “L” word. Like i don’t like the “L” word in an intimate sense, it scares me. Luv is fine, but “LOVE” has too much emotional meaning behind it for it to be said just willy nilly, for me personally. ANYWAY STORY TIME KINDA? I GUESS OVER. (i choose hugs.) 66. Lips or eyes: Eyes, honestly the amount of times i want to just admire anyone’s eyes is uncountable. The unique patterns and shade and lighting UH. 67. Shorter or taller: Taller.  68. Older or younger: Honestly the elderly and the youth scare me. I’m okay with anyone as long as they accept me. 70. Nice arms or nice stomach: Nice person. 71. Sensitive or loud: Both. If you wanna be loud by thor be as loud as you want (as long as you respect that we all have a right to quiet), if u wanna talk bout ur feelings sure i’ll listen, can’t help but i’ll listen. 72. Hook up or relationship: What is a hook up? Relationship i guess? 73. Troublemaker or hesitant: Hesitant.

HAVE YOU EVER: 74. Kissed a Stranger: Again, No to the kisses. 75. Drank hard liquor: Again, Not legally allowed too. 76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: Don’t wear em. 77. Turned someone down: HA who’d want me 78. Sex on the first date: Let’s just stop at “first date”  79. Broken someone’s heart: Lmao i hope not, don’t waste ur time on my dumb ass. I’m too oblivious for that. 80. Had your heart broken: Idk if it counts as a “heart break” if ur like, 13. Like chill child your still young. 81. Been arrested: Nah 82. Cried when someone died: Of Course. 83. Fallen for a friend: Tripped, yes. in love? Don’t think so.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN: 84. Yourself: HELL NO :D 85. Miracles: pffft, nah 86. Love at first sight: Absolutely not. 87. Santa Claus: A creepy old white fat man that gives me presents? (sugar daddy) 88. Kiss on the first date: Again, Kisses are a No-No unless i share a very strong emotional bond with you (even then u’d be lucky)

OTHER: 90. Current best friend name: probs this scrub @beeboplox 91. Eyecolor: Brown.  92. Favorite movie: The incredibles?

TAGGING TIME: The usual @whovian1077, @firthermore​, @haikyuukazoo​, and anyone who wants to do this.

100% optional! If ya would like me to stop tagging you gimme a shout and i’ll stop (also goes if you’d like to be tagged). Thanks y’all for being awesome. =PP

[adrift-in-writing]

Little Death: Chapter 4 - Belong

Read on AO3

A little later than I’d have liked, but it’s better it be late than never at all.

Quick edit: 9,990 words. Lmao.

________________________

Miss a part? Click to be redirected.

Part 1 - Alone | Part 2 - Together | Part 3 - Safe

It was already Christmas Eve, and Lena and Amélie were due for some super late present shopping, having forgotten to get Winston and Emily gifts. It seemed that Amélie had recovered from her incident two nights ago, but she was struggling to come to terms that it had happened. She had no idea why it even occurred, but that would not let her down. This had left the freckled girl and the scientist to housekeep while the two girls were away. The moon had risen, and the night sky dribbled snowflakes.

Emily was casually sitting down on a curved couch with her portable drafting station, drawing the cityscape outside. Something about her drawing seemed off, mostly because it was uninspired at the moment. She drew and she drew, but no matter what, the illustrious grandeur of the skylines just couldn’t be captured. Instead, she took a picture for later reference, stared at her artwork, and after a few moments, she scrapped it.

That was when the freckled girl laid herself down on the couch and shuffled around for a bit. Any minute now, they’d come back. After all, they were mostly waiting on a révellion, or a long dinner.

So they did. Both girls arrived up to their loft, and Lena propped open the door only to be helped by Winston, who at the time was watching a documentary on penguins to pass the time. Amélie was in tow, carrying her own stack of presents. None of them were hers, because the adventurer had promised her something ‘super special’ on Christmas evening, without even leaving so much as a hint to what it was. She didn’t mind, so long as she got something in return.

They set down the presents around the Christmas tree, with Amélie taking off her gloves and scarf before proceeding onwards to the kitchen to prepare for the dinner, and Lena propped herself up while sliding down her goggles to her neck. Curiously, Winston had forgotten to greet them and instead made some noises. “Did ya take your shot yet?” The young girl had politely asked of the large scientist. Maybe he missed it.

Nervously, Winston chuckled. “Um...penguins.” He pointed at the documentary still going on, trying to divert the focus on his genetic shots. Groaning, Lena placed her goggles back on her face.

“Winston! What would Angie say, mate?” She sighed and expressed her disapproval. It wasn't uncommon for Winston to miss out on his genetic therapy on-the-go shots, but to miss it and expect her not to notice was something else. Just as she was preparing to blink into the guest room, the scientist raised his hands in protest.

“Okay, okay! Let me go quietly.” He shook his head in shame and headed back to his guest room for the time being. He wouldn't be out for at least another hour - but the three girls would wait on him.

Heading down the stairs, Emily greeted them and gave a big grin to the two of them. “And here I thought I was gonna have to spend the night with Winston.” But she didn’t, and she was more than glad about it. She did see the scientist head back to his room, and she pointed her thumb behind her. "What's that about?"

Raising her hand, Lena shrugged off the question. "Not to worry, luv! He'll be fine." In return, Lena pointed towards the kitchen as she hung up her goggles elsewhere, and took off her bomber jacket. "D'you mind helpin'?"

Without hesitation, Emily nodded and giggled with a cute little grin. The cold woman had rolled up her sleeves and was washing her hands when she noticed the two freckled Brits chuckling to each other. She gave a soft smile in return, admiring the moment. "Précieux (Precious)..." Amélie softly muttered, but she shook her head and calmly chuckled as she wiped her hands off with a towel. "Get over here and help me."

Quickly, the fridge was popped open by Lena who set most of the food Amélie bought into the kitchen counters. They were once empty, but were now filled with countless amounts of food fit for at least eight people. This, of course, made the spider snicker. "Lena. No." Just before Lena got out her Yorkshire pie, she nervously smiled, but Amélie wagged her finger. "Not all at once, chérie (dear/sweetheart). We've got New Years and the remaining week to think about."

Emily took the opportunity to put half the food away as Lena felt a little disappointed. The young adventurer instead opened up most of the seals and other ingredients. She got to work on washing out the salad and other winter ingredients by running them over water, and the freckled redhead to pre-heat the ovens for the turkey, and leg of lamb.

All in the meanwhile, Amélie calmly ordered the two around so that she could speed up the process. Several minutes passed, and when the tedious parts of getting the kitchen in order was out of the way, they had a breather to wait. The lush scent of assorted meats filled the air as they were being roasted, and they casually relaxed on the sofa, having switched Winston's documentary to the 2076 remake of 'Love, Actually'. More than half of the cast comprised of Omnics and people of color, all with varying amounts of love to be shown.

It was awkward for the cold woman to even be remotely here. All these years alone on Christmas, and only now did she have a sense of family surrounding her again. It warmed her heart just a smidge, but she couldn't fully appreciate it knowing they'd have to get back up to prep the table and get the food out. Just then, Lena perked herself up and gazed at Amélie. "I've been thinkin'..." She spoke up, and both Amélie and Emily turned their attention to her. "Maybe Emmy an' Winston should stay for New Years before going back." Amélie turned over to take a look at Emily, who then looked back at the woman. They refocused their eyes back on Lena without saying a word, but the redhead grinned at the idea. "Feels off they're only stayin' for two days, y'know?"

After some careful consideration, Amélie sighed and nodded. "Only because I like her. That, and Winston could speed up my procedure."

"Aces!" They both cried out, causing the woman to flinch a bit. She settled down after a couple moments, with the two Brits snuggling up to her as they watched the movie. After a while though, Emily backed off because Amélie's cold skin felt unnatural, and Lena giggled, only telling her she'd get used to it.

Out in the corner of their eyes, the guest room door opened up slowly. Winston groaned loudly as he stretched his neck and moved towards them. "Ughhh. That hurt a lot." It took a moment for him to register it, but he noticed all three girls were staring at him. He awkwardly looked back and readjusted his glasses, and noticed the movie they were watching. "Oh. Love, Hacktually. Been meaning to watch that." He gestured at them in a way to ask if he was allowed to sit on the couch. They all nodded, with Lena and Amélie scooting over and Emily patting the free empty seat.

For the next several minutes, they continued on with the movie. Winston, Lena, and Emily were mostly the ones guffawing at the cheesy one-liners and other comedic bits, while Amélie softly chuckled. Then the oven bells rang, giving off a simple 'ding' to indicate it was time. The cold woman shot up from her couch and went to go get her oven mitts, and Lena blinked over to help her get the table ready. Emily was the last to stand up, leaving Winston alone to watch the movie for the time being. She was tasked with doubling up on serving the food at the table.

Before serving, Amélie double checked to make sure the turkey and its stuffing was at the perfect temperature. Indeed, the meat and the stuffing was at 74 degrees Celsius, or 165 degrees Fahrenheit. It needed time to cool off, as with the lamb. The rest however was perfectly able to be eaten, so Emily and Amélie took out all the prepared food and set them on hot plates. From the mashed potatoes, the Niçoise-style salad, various sauces to dip food in, Pigs in Blankets/Pigs in a Basket, loads of fruits and vegetables (for Winston's diet), a Yule log chocolate spongecake and the Yorkshire pie, and Christmas pudding just for Emily, all of it was ready to go. A small bottle of champagne and three glasses of eggnog were pre-filled with whipped cream were ready as well, just set aside from the food.

Thus, it was set. Save for the turkey and lamb, the dinner was ready. All they needed now was to wait, and so they did for about fifteen or so minutes. When the first third of the movie concluded, the cold woman paused the film by lifting her hand up in the air and pressing forward in the air, and she turned it off. Everybody around her gave her a look, and she stood up once again. "It's time." She softly spoke. Nodding, all four moved towards the kitchen to help move out the meals.

The turkey and lamb were in the middle, whilst the bowl of vegetables and fruits were where Winston seated himself. While he was genetically modified later down in his life, that did not particularly change up his dietary needs as a gorilla. To be frank, the three girls weren't quite sure if he could even consume eggnog and desserts. Even the scientist wasn't sure, but he was willing to try.

Dinner started with Amélie getting the first slice of turkey and lamb, with Lena insisting so. She deserved it, because it was her first Christmas surrounded by people who cared about her. The rest proceeded to get their own respective portions. It was delicious, everything synergized together so perfectly, and in general the first few minutes were just filled with laughter and overall glee for the first impressions of things. It settled down past that, and it remained silent for a bit before a conversation sparked up.

"So...Amy. Do you mind if I call you that? Amy?" Emily had asked. Amélie blinked a few times, but she played it cool and chuckled.

Amy? Really, how hard could it be to just say her name? But maybe...oh, Mel, or Melly felt nice. Regardless, she replied in a calm tone. "Please. Amélie has a nicer ring to it. Amy feels...less elegant. Casual." Her fork and knife clinked as she let go for the time being. She took a sip of her champagne and thought for a moment. "Amy. Amy. Melly. Maybe." She muttered to herself.

"...Okay. No nicknames then." Emily chuckled, while the other two were remaining silent. She tried to get Amélie's attention again, which the freckled girl was successfully able to do so. "What did you ever do before you uh...became an assassin?"

Just then, Winston and Lena stopped eating and stared at Emily. They weren't quite sure if she was being serious, but Lena was more worried it might tick off Amélie to speak of her past. For a moment, those concerns grew a little more real when the woman blankly stared at the redhead. But the concerns fell off after Amélie snickered, and Lena breathed a sigh of relief. "Secretary for a business corporation. I'm not sure which one. I know it was economically related..."

Scratching her head, her mind clouded itself up when she was trying to figure out which corporation she worked for. Brushing it off, she shook her head. "I...vaguely remember anything about it." Amélie then covered her mouth with her index finger and had a thoughtful pose to her. "...Come to think of it, I also remember I had a master's in Business and a license in Economics. And, some years in a ballet-dancing or music-related degree. I don't know which."

For a moment, Amélie looked up at the young girl and smiled. "Lena helped me remember. We found a ledger in the office of my old estate. But, it was only brief that I remember these things."

Shrugging, Emily chuckled and understood that this was years ago. Lena had indeed mentioned a lot of horrible things to the redhead prior to meeting Amélie herself. Things got silent for a brief moment, but the spider had her own question in return. "What about you? I am only aware you're an artist."

Emily froze up a little bit out of embarrassment. Nervously, she laughed a little. "O-oh, um...no, I'm just an art student. First year, actually. I like drawing! But I also like writing." She bit her lower lip. "I'm not that good at either." At least, that's what she thought. Winston raised his finger up as he was munching down some fruits and grunted.

"No, don't be too hard on yourself. The poems you sent me and the doodles I see are pretty awesome." He gave a thumbs up, and Amélie nodded. Truth be told, she was quite approving of the art she saw in the Croydon apartment Emily had. But this caused the redhead to blush a little and hide her face in more embarrassment. She was indistinctly saying something, and Lena giggled as she patted the freckled girl's head.

"Now look what you two did! Ya flattered her." She chortled a little bit, but Lena proceeded to lean in and whisper about how - teasingly - she thought Emily's art was trashy. In response, the redhead emerged out of her embarrassment and jokingly told her to shut up. Lena teased her some more, but by the end of it they laughed, and Emily shook her head at how far the conversation went. Amélie smiled at the scene, mostly because it was...nice to see Lena smiling and laughing and just in general being happy. Something about tonight was really getting her to feel a lot more emotive, and it wasn't just how good the food tasted, but rather the aura and spirit of their festivities.

Dinner eventually wrapped up when most of the food and desserts were consumed. It really did turn out Winston could drink eggnog, but he could not eat meat or have anything super sweet. More conversations were held over the course of the long dinner - such as Emily's desire to become professional, but only as a regular artist and not an animation type artist. Everybody around the table knew Lena, so it was really up to the scientist to carry out his own journey in the Lunar Space Colony with his caretaker, Harold. He vaguely remembered spending Christmas with other small chimps around the colony, but...it was all a haze with his work swamping him.

Time flew by, and it flew by quick. Though Lena wanted to conclude tonight by having Amélie play the piano as promised, it really was getting too late. They needed to get clean first and foremost, and above all they still had a ton of time to demonstrate Amélie's talent for the ivory keys.

So that's what Lena and Amélie did. They took a long shower and got dressed in loose-fitting but comfortable clothes. Winston had gotten off to bed already, but Emily was still up still trying to get inspired. She was writing down inspirational ideas, but eventually found it too hard to keep awake. The two girls were the last to make it to bed. Amélie blissfully sighed as her head hit the pillow and Lena snuggled up to her.

"Lena." She softly whispered into her love's ear, and stroked the young girl's hand. "Is this what it's like to have a family again...?"

Softly chuckling, Lena looked at the woman in her yellow eyes. "I mean, I s'ppose we're part of the family. Mum and Da aren't here. Neither are my siblings. Rest of Overwatch would be the super big family. "

A few seconds pass, and the only thing they heard mildly was their breathing. "But that's not what you meant, is it?" Lena stared rather intently at their lover for a while, and smirked. The young girl nodded and gave a quick peck on Amélie's cheek and patted her shoulder. "Yes. This is what family feels like, luv." She remained silent for a few moments before laughing at the thought. "Everybody loves each other. We cherish moments no matter how small. We stay together."

With a nod, the cold woman exhaled and closed her eyes. A soft smile was laid across her lips. "Then I know I'm right when I say that I'm where I want to be."

[antijero]

92 truths TAG MEME.

Tagged by @elmundodeyukimora​ <3 thanks

Rules: Write 92 truths about yourself then tag 25 people 8D

LATEST…

[1] Drinks: Lemonade [2] Telephone call: Angela (Sister) [3] Text message: Telcel (boyfriend) lmao [4] Song you heard: Shakira - Lo hecho está hecho.... and i regret..... [5] Time you cried: One week ago..... PEPPER POTTS WAS DYING, K? I GOT TO EMOTIONAL WITH THAT, shut up

HAVE YOU EVER…

[6] Dated someone twice: Yes......... i guess? still? i dont know? hotel? trivago.  [7] Been cheated on: Welp, club penguin counts? [8] Kissed someone and regretted it: YES, mi first kiss, it was like kissing a fucking fish [9] Lost someone special: Hmm..... Nope, no :3 [10] Been depressed: Yas. Don’t ask. [11] Gotten drunk and thrown up: lol yes, but thrown up never

LIST THREE FAVOURITE COLORS…

[12] Red [13] Gold [14] Black

IN THE LAST YEAR…

[15] made new friends: Yasssssss all the bitches from GDE UwUr [16] fallen out of love: Welp, i’ve been since the last 3 years<3 luv u bae [17] laughed until you cried: i even get uffocated lmao [18] found out someone was talking about you: Hmmm i don’t remember, and i don’t really care lol [19] met someone who changed you: YAs, a lot of persons :3 and thanks for that, even the bad ones (Not really, screw your all lol), but all of it in a good way 8D [20] found out who your true friends are: Yas uwu  [21] kissed someone on your facebook list: Lol no

GENERAL…

[22] how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: .......... i need to get out more frequently lol [23] do you have any pets: 4 dogs and one cat who doesn’t have a name 8D but i love her with my life, i call her “Gata” 8DD [24] do you want to change your name: Probably my first name, just one letter? instead of “Patrizia”, “Patricia” my mama tought that would be fun if she put a Z instead of a C cuz all the rest of my name, has a Z on it..... mom stop. [25] what did you do for your last birthday: i don’t know, i don’t really remember 8D but probably: eat.. a lot, lol [26] what time did you wake up: ........... lets see.. on this time i wake up at 9 pm... lol [27] what were you doing at midnight last night: Drawing 8D [28] name something you cannot wait for: Job? welp, mY job, cuz i want to have my own place where i can tattoo and get payed for that 8D [29] when was the last time you saw your mother: like 3 hours ago.. on my house... [30] what is one thing you wish you could change about your life: I don’t know, im ok with my life, so... nothing? cause i don’t know what i want to change? [31] what are you listening to right now: Uhmm Banana Brain - Die antwoord 8D [32] have you ever talked to a person named tom: Never, probably Tomás? but i don’t remember anything lol (don’t get to surprise, my memory sucks lol) [33] something that is getting on your nerves: A lot of things? i don’t want to talk about it lol [34] most visited website: Eldarya lol [35] elementary: I was a pain on the ass lol [36] high school: Still being a pain on the ass, but not that annoying lol [37] college: bye icarly and carlos, you were great [38] hair color: Blaaack uwu [39] long or short hair: Afro... [40] do you have a crush on someone: My sweet bae ;/u/; love you burra ,3,.....

And of course, Nathan Drake :V 💕

[41] what do you like about yourself: probably that i don’t give a fuck on mostly... Welp, everything? and my acento fierrO PARIENTE, ARRIBA EL NORTE CHINGAO

[42] piercings: None :[ [43] blood type: O+ ? guess, don’t know [44] nickname: Antijero, Vendetta, PiaVentetta [45] relationship status: With maaa babyyy YASsS [46] zodiac sign: Taurus [47] pronouns: Pendeja.. [48] fav tv show: Supernatural uwU [49] tattoos: None :[[ BUT I WILL HAVE TATTOOS ALL OVER MY BODY [50] right or left hand: Right

FIRST…

[51] surgery: None [52] piercing: None :,u [53] best friend: Rafaella [54] sport: Hahahahhah, you’re funny [55] vacation: México :,[[ only, shit [56] pair of trainers: what

RIGHT NOW…

[57] eating: Nothing [58] drinking: Still lemonade [59] i’m about to: keep drawing my guardian [60] listening to: Music [61] waiting for: Que la pendeja de Auri me responda el puto mensaje [62] want: Burger, with a lot of meat, AND CHEESE [63] get married: pa’ k kieres saber eso jaja salu2 [64] career: TATTOOIST.... Soon.. in one year, hope so 8D

WHICH IS BETTER…

[65] hugs or kisses: hugs u//w//u [66] lips or eyes: Asses [67] shorter or taller: Depends [68] older or younger: don’t really care [69] romantic or spontaneous: Funny and bully :9 [70] nice arms or nice stomach: Assesx2 [71] sensitive or loud: don’t get lol [72] hook up or relationship: Relationship :3 [73] troublemaker or hesitant: Hesitant??

HAVE YOU EVER…

[74] kissed a stranger?: Nope [75] drank hard liquor?: yass [76] lost glasses/contact lenses?: Nope [77] turned someone down: Yes [78] sex on first date?: i don’t do dates lol [79] broken someone’s heart?: I don’t know........ hope i do not [80] had your own heart broken?: Hm yes [81] been arrested?: no lol [82] cried when someone died?: Hmm, only with my pets

[83] fallen for a friend?: Welp, my partner was my best friend and still... So yes lol, actually i’ve only get in love with my friends cause i need to know the person who i’m dating

DO YOU BELIEVE IN… [84] yourself?: like a superhero? heck yeah [85] miracles?: Probably, but not the divine mercy things [86] love at first sight?: Nope, as i said, i need to know the person 8D [87] Santa Claus?: I WANT MY DRONE YOU WHITE/RED MOTHER FUCKER [88] kiss on the first date?: don’t do dates [89] angels?: im agnostic so who knows :^)

OTHER…

[90] current best friend’s name: Rafaella ,v, [91] eye color: Brown poo nigga [92] favorite movie: I don’t remember any of i have seen 8DDDD

I tag @katherinegmz95​ cuz i want to know her more(? 8D and i don’t know someone else lmao<3