#this assignment should NOT just be worth 5 points

[nico-the-overlord]

I loath how one of my teachers handles grading and time allotted for assignments it is killing me slowly

[mysteryshoptls]

SSR Ruggie Bucchi - Room Relaxation Vignette

"Happy Birthday"

[Exterior Hallway 2F]

Ruggie: Oh hey, Floyd-kun! Perfect timing. I've been lookin' for ya.

Floyd: Hm? You need me for something, Sharksucker-chan?

Ruggie: Remember how I told ya the other day that my birthday's tomorrow?

Floyd: Mmmm… Now that'cha mention it, kinda sounds familiar, but I'd completely forgotten 'bout that.

Ruggie: I thought so. I'm glad I came to remind you, then.

Ruggie: Sooooo I'M COUNTIN' ON YA TO GIVE ME A PRESENT TOMORROW!!

Floyd: Your birthday's got nothin' to do with me, though?

Ruggie: IT DEFINITELY DOES! I DID SO MANY OF YOUR CHORES FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY!!

Ruggie: Although, I bet you forgot that, too… ANYWAY, SERIOUSLY, DON'T FORGET MY PRESENT!!

Floyd: Ahah, you're really wantin' one, huh.

[Classroom]

Ruggie: Might've been a bust to try'n get somethin' outta Floyd-kun. But who knows, he might come in clutch.

Ruggie: I gotta find a buncha other people to remind, I guess～ Hm? What's that bag of candy that guy's holdin' over there…?

Ruggie: Hey, you, that snack looks pretty tasty. Can ya give me one?

[Diasomnia student speaks]

Ruggie: Ehhhh～ Then, what about the sticker on the bag? Oh, I can have that? Thanks!

Ruggie: Nice, that went well. The sticker's the thing I wanted from the start, anyway.

Ruggie: If I scan the code on this sticker with my phone, I could win a prize worth 30,000 Madol [300 Thaumarks] in their giveaway!!

Ruggie: Then, if I win something, that's a profit at no cost. I'll hafta thank that guy if that happens… in spirit, that is!

Ruggie: Next is… That guy that's about to leave the classroom with his wallet out!

Ruggie: Hey, y'know, tomorrow's my birthday～! I hope you'll be givin' me a gift in return for the one I gave you.

Ruggie: But anyway, putting that aside, you're up next in history class, right? You got everything prepped already?

[Scarabia student speaks]

Ruggie: Not yet, but you're wantin' to head to the Mystery Shop first? Oh hey, then I can go shopping for ya, then. Not sayin' I'm payin', though.

Ruggie: You want the new soda that just dropped, and a cheese-flavored snack? You're good with whatever I pick for that? Okay, gotcha.

Ruggie: He gave me 500 Madol [5 Thaumarks] for that… This should be enough plus a little tip for me, sheeheehee!

[Savanaclaw Dorm – Walkway]

Ruggie: Did some shoppin', helped with some chores, cleaned up the clubroom… Sheeheehee, I made a bit of spare change today, too.

Ruggie: Guess that's enough workin' for now. I'll go hop in the shower now.

Ruggie: Who'd've ever thunk there'd come a time where I'd get to shower every day like it's nothin'～

Ruggie: There's no way I'd've ever been able to splash around in the shower like this back home.

Ruggie: I love living in a dorm at school! Can't believe there's guys complainin' about there not bein' a bathtub, or havin' to share a shower room.

Ruggie: Whew, that was refreshing. I've toweled off good enough, and my hair'll be fine like this.

Ruggie: Oookay, it's study time. I ain't got the time to be failing my classes!!

[Savanaclaw Dorm – Ruggie's Room]

Ruggie: Ancient Incantations homework starts on this page of the textbook, huh. Uhhhhh… Yup, I don't get it at all.

Ruggie: What's even the point of learnin' 'bout these dead languages, anyway? Can't really get excited to learn 'bout somethin' I can't find a use for.

Ruggie: Hey, you're pretty good at ancient incantations, right? Can you translate this sentence from the textbook for me?

Ruggie: Of course, I'm not askin' for it for free! I'll help you with your Animal Linguistics assignment in return.

[Roommate speaks]

Ruggie: …All right, deal! Wheew, it's nice havin' a roommate I can count on.

Ruggie: Man, why do uppity schools hand out so much stuff to do? There's no way one person could do all this homework and classwork review all on their own…

Ruggie: …Right, ancient incantations is doneee!! I should hurry and get my other assignments outta the way too.

Ruggie: Whew, finally, I'm done～ That's seriously waaay too much work, man.

Ruggie: Now, then… Guess I'll get this done too, while I'm still at my desk.

「Survey on Quality of Life Improvements for the Student Body」

Ruggie: I'd be more thrilled to fill it out if they'd give us some money or a prize for answering it～

Ruggie: Not like we'd even know if or when they'd do anything. I'll just quickly throw somethin' together.

Ruggie: I only have one thing I want. "GIVE ME TIME TO WORK SOME GIGS!!"

Ruggie: There's waaay too much homework, and most of the classes are hard to get through without reviewing and prepping for the next class…

Ruggie: Plus, joinin' a club's mandatory, so we got practice or matches on weekends which cuts into what little time I got to try to find a job!!

Ruggie: It's not hard findin' temp jobs, but this basically means that I can't really make money unless it's a long break.

Ruggie: …Oh, you're heading to bed? Yeah, I'm pretty much done with this survey, so I'm gonna sleep too. ''Kay then, night～

Ruggie: Sheeheehee, I can hear his soft sleep breathing. Alright… Now it's my "fun" time.

Ruggie: I'll pull the cover all the way around me, then turn on my phone light…

[flips through banknotes]

Ruggie: Sheeheehee! Ever since I came to Night Raven College, my savings've been slowly goin' up.

Ruggie: I got a ton of coins now too, so I should go deposit these soon. It's scary just having cash lay around unprotected.

Ruggie: Even if I can't really find part-time gigs, thanks to living in the dorm, I don't gotta spend stuff on food or other small things here and there!

Ruggie: Plus, there's times people'll split stuff with me, or give me things they don't need anymore. There's so many ways to build up more cash.

Ruggie: I should be able to pick up another job over the next break, too. What if my savings hits another digit…!!

Ruggie: Haaaaah～ …I get such a good feelin' when I can just gaze at my bankbook like this. I gotta keep on workin' hard tomorrow, too.

Ruggie: Ah, I should sleep soon. I should do my usual thing.

Ruggie: Y'never know what can happen on campus at any time. Gotta stash my bankbook and wallet under my pillow and wrap it all with a towel…

Ruggie: After that, pull the cover allll the way over my head and I'm ready to conk out! Now I can sleep soundly.

[Savanaclaw Dorm – Ruggie's Room]

[alarm rings]

Ruggie: Yaaaaawn～～～

Ruggie: Yay, it's morning! First things first, gotta wash my face and get ready!!

Ruggie: I need ta quickly finish all the stuff I gotta get done, then go gather up all my birthday gifts. I ain't got time to dawdle!

[Savanaclaw Dorm – Washroom]

Ruggie: …Ooh, hey! Someone left behind some face soap. Mine now.

Ruggie: Wheeew～ that was a nice find. I gotta thank whichever dummy left that in a shared room!

[splash, splash…!]

Ruggie: That's washing done. Usually I just use water, so it feels super refreshing to use soap once in a while.

Ruggie: After wipin' all the water off with a towel, next I gotta moisturize. Just gotta spread this wildebeest brand oil on my hands…

Ruggie: Then I gotta rub it all over my face, rub it into my ears, and comb it through my hair with my fingers… Nice, all done.

Ruggie: Man, this oil is the best! I can use the just one thing on my skin, hair, hands, and even my ears.

Ruggie: Honestly, I find all this upkeep a pain, but it's cheaper in the long run to take care of myself now, instead of waiting until somethin' happens and I gotta go to the hospital or somethin'.

Ruggie: For 300 Madol, one bottle of this stuff can be used anywhere on my body, the effectiveness-to-price ratio is way in my favor. I wanna use these guys forever.

Ruggie: All right then… It's my birthday, so I guess I'll throw on a bit of makeup. I'll just consider it an investment to help get more lively responses from all the well-wishers.

Ruggie: I'll use some of the free sunscreen samples first… And as for eyeshadow, I think I'll use some of my special stuff.

Ruggie: Ta-da, the super high brand-name stuff that Leona-san gave me! Or, more like, the stuff I got to keep after I dropped it on the floor and all the powder went everywhere.

Ruggie: I couldn't sell it anywhere, since it looked like this, so I guess all I can do is use it myself.

Ruggie: Mm, but I'm starting to see the bottom of the container 'cause I've been using it too much… No, wait, I can still get some up if I rub my finger in the corner like this…!

Ruggie: Just gotta rub it neatly on my eyelid without wasting a speck… Ooh, lookin' good. All that's left is…

Ruggie: Oh yeah, I can use the eyeliner that I got from a classmate for my birthday last year.

Ruggie: Couldn't sell this either, 'cause it was an old version, or something like that. I should use it before it goes bad, I guess.

Ruggie: Nice, now I'm ready to get goin'! Now I just gotta go wake up Leona-san, and maybe I can wring somethin' outta him while I'm at it!

[Main Street]

Floyd: Hey, Sharksucker-chan. Happy Birthday～ I brought you a present.

Ruggie: You did!? Awesome, Floyd-kun! I knew I could count on ya to come in clutch.

Floyd: I just suddenly felt like clearing out all the stuff in my room I didn't need anymore, sooo～

Floyd: Here ya go, I'll give you this fashion magazine. It's way old now, so there ain't really a point to readin' it anymore.

Ruggie: An old magazine, huh. Eh, I guess it's better than getting noth… Hm? WAIT, THIS ISSUE…!!

Ruggie: FLOYD-KUN…! THANK YOU! THIS IS THE BEST!!!

Floyd: You're that happy to get trash as a gift, huh. Don't really get it, but good for you.

Ruggie: I guess you didn't know what this magazine is really worth.

Ruggie: It's been the talk of the town how this issue's got some photos of an idol that's been super hot right now from a photoshoot before their debut!

Ruggie: If I sell this, I should get at least 10,000 Madol! [100 Thaumarks] Or, maybe more…!? Sheeheehee, this is a dream come true!

Ruggie: I gotta get it out there 'fore their popularity wanes. Plus, I gotta go 'round and get more birthday stuff from everyone else, too…

Ruggie: Wheeew～ Today's lookin' out to be a busy one. THIS IS AN AWESOME START TO THE DAY!!

Requested by Anonymous.

[beneathsilverstars]

Can you pls explain to me the proper way to raise a child gender neutrally, especially in a world that loves to push gender? It’s something I always wanted to do when I have my own kid but I’m scared the world is just not ready for that kind of thing and my child will get bullied by other kids/adults.

Unfortunately the feasibility of this does depend on where you live. I’m lucky to live in a fairly liberal college town — the state as a whole is awful, but in this town we have drag shows and a huge pride parade and rainbow stickers in shop fronts. There are still transphobic people here of course, but they generally know that being too overt about it will have social repercussions.

However! It doesn’t necessarily have to be an all-or-nothing thing! When your kid's a baby it’s up to you how you refer to them while in different situations, so you’re free to adjust your language as seems necessary. And then when they’re old enough to care, well, at that point it’s not up to you anyway! (My kid has decided she’s a nonbinary girl, hence the she/hers in this post.)

So here’s a list of things my partners and I did, and you can decide which things seem safe / worth it to you.

We gave her a name that doesn’t have strong gender connotations.

We shopped in the boys and girls sections equally, aiming for a roughly equal number of fancy little button ups vs fancy little dresses, pink diapers vs blue diapers, etc.

We told friends and family that we were planning to raise her gender neutrally and use they/them pronouns, until/unless she expressed a preference otherwise.

Our explanation to adults was along the lines of “We don't want to assign a gender to our child, because we think gender should be a freely-made choice rather than something that is assumed based on body type. So, we're raising them gender neutrally until they decide what they want to be. We’re not assigning them 'nonbinary', either; we’re using they/them to help avoid gendered bias, so they’ll get to experience feminine, masculine, and ungendered options equally. That way every option will be open to them as they learn their own preferences and decide who they want to be.”

Our explanation to kids was along the lines of “I don’t know yet if they’re a boy or a girl or something else! When babies are born, the doctor guesses what gender they’ll be. But sometimes the doctor guesses wrong, and the kid grows up to be a different gender. We decided not to guess what gender our baby will be, because we want to let them choose.” This usually makes perfect sense to 4-5 year olds! (Younger kids might not entirely understand or care, and older kids might have more questions.) However, you gotta be careful with this, bc even some people who are okay with you explaining your own adult transed gender won’t like you implying to their children that everyone should have that option and the whole system is bs. The less objectionable explanation is “I’m going to wait until they’re older to ask them whether they’re a boy or a girl.” Or even answering "What gender is your baby?" with "What do you think?" and then "Maybe!"

We didn’t announce her agab. When people asked, we refused to answer, more or less politely depending on the vibes. If you really want to make them feel bad you can give them a weird look and say “My child’s body is none of your business??” but there’s also the gentler “I don’t think it really matters!” We did fill out her assigned sex for official paperwork, like doctor's forms and legal government stuff, but for more casual forms we sometimes skipped the question or wrote in "we are raising them gender-neutrally" or "they/them".

We generally didn’t correct strangers or explain it to them unless they asked. Nothing wrong with some people assuming “she” and some people assuming “he”, as long as it’s not always just one or the other. If a stranger asked about their gender, I'd go for a quick "We're raising them gender-neutrally." I did also have to clarify fairly often that I only have one kid, when I talked about them and people assumed the "they" was plural, but that was never a big deal it was just kinda funny.

We did correct friends and family, since if they used gendered pronouns it was an active choice or mistake rather than a clueless assumption. Most of our circles are queer so most people were chill about it, but some family members changed one diaper and immediately assigned a pronoun set. We didn't think it was worth fighting over or limiting access, since it's not like they were disrespecting the baby's preference. But we did keep correcting them / emphasizing the neutral pronoun in our replies.

When she started preschool, we preemptively explained to her teachers that we're raising her gender-neutrally, and to please refer to her using "they/them" unless she said otherwise, and to avoid splitting the class into boys vs girls teams or anything like that. Again, fairly liberal town, and the preschool even has a teacher who uses they/them, so the teachers agreed without issue. iirc, they messed up occasionally but they were making an effort, and again I wasn't too bothered as long as my kid wasn't.

When she started using she/her sometimes, I let her teachers know, and told them to follow her lead. When we talked with friends and family we just used the right pronouns ourselves, and explained if they asked or it came up. And then once she was consistently using just she/her, we made a facebook post about it and started correcting people with a quick "She actually decided to use she/her, now."

And then here's how we talked about gender with her, specifically.

When she was old enough to start wondering who's a boy and who's a girl and what that even means, we explained, "Some people are girls, some people are boys, some people are neither or both or something else. I decided I don't want to be a boy or a girl, I'm nonbinary instead. You can decide if you want to be a boy or a girl or nonbinary or something else, too." and "Well, maybe that person's a boy, but they could be something else; I don't know because I don't know them. I don't know their name or anything either." We decided not to explain how differently most of society treats gender, the stereotypes of gender presentation, etc, until she started noticing that stuff herself. Explaining that it's wrong still involves putting those ideas into her head, which was going to happen pretty soon anyway regardless. Might as well start with a foundation of pure gender anarchy while we can.

When she noticed that every other kid she's met already had a gender, we explained "A lot of parents guess what gender their kid will be, and sometimes they guess right or sometimes they guess wrong. [Friend]'s mom guessed that she was a girl, and [friend] agrees! But when Mama was a kid people guessed she was a boy, and then she grew up and decided she's actually a girl. We didn't want to guess for you and maybe get it wrong, so we decided to wait until you were old enough to decide for yourself what gender you want to be."

Occasionally when the topic came up, we would ask if she felt like she wanted to be a girl or boy or something else, or specifically ask if she liked "they/them" or wanted to use "she/her" or "he/him". When she was ~2, she didn't entirely understand and didn't care. When she was ~3, she occasionally said she wanted to be a girl or use she/her, but immediately changed her mind as soon as we actually referred to her as such. (This is quite in-character for her, because she's generally averse to big changes and doesn't like to do anything she doesn't feel totally confident about.) When she was ~4 she finally stuck with it, and now she's a nonbinary girl who uses she/her, and her feelings about gendered terms like "daughter" still go back and forth a bit.

When she started expressing preferences in clothing, colors, etc, we just got things she liked, which ended up being dresses and sparkles.

As she started noticing gender differences, picking up stereotypes from school and media, etc, we'd address them as they came up. "Yes, a lot of people think dresses are just for girls. But I think that isn't very fair. Some boys love to wear dresses, and some girls don't, and that's just fine! It's not very nice to tell someone else what they're allowed to wear. (Unless they need certain clothes to say safe, like a jacket in the winter.)"

We also had to tell her to stop being sexist, lol. "It's fine that you think girls are awesome, they are! But boys are awesome too. It's not very nice to say you won't play with someone just because of their gender. If someone said they wouldn't play with me because I'm nonbinary, I would be so sad! If you don't want to play with [these three classmates] because they're usually too loud and rough, that's fine, but that's not because they're boys; that's because of what games they like to play. Some girls like to play loud and rough, and some boys like to be more careful and quiet like you. Can you think of any boys in your class who you like to play with sometimes? ... See, boys can like all sorts of different games, just like girls can."

We ended up getting the easiest resolution (at least for now): by the time she reached the age where kids start caring about these things, she'd started caring, and settled into being a classic girly girl (with the occasional splash of nonbinary flavor). If she'd stuck to they/them, she'd probably be starting to have a harder time in school -- definitely not full bullying, given her 12-kid 2-teacher private kindergarten class, but probably some frustration with constantly correcting people.

However... if she was more gnc, she woulda ended up that way sooner or later, anyway. If I was choosing between "she's out and proud trans and gets some shit for it" or "she's unhappy with being cis but doesn't realize she has other options," I'd always choose the former, because in that case she gets a choice. By the time kids are old enough to bully each other over gender, they're old enough to decide whether they want to be out at school, y'know? And I've always been ready to pull her from school if it ever became necessary due to peer bullying or unsupportive teachers, especially since she shares a lot of the traits that my wife got bullied for as a child.

It is possible to go 100% gender-neutral, and cut anyone out of your life who opposes it, including moving schools or even moving house if necessary. There are people who will support this choice, even cishet people who don't really get the trans thing but know that unconscious sexism can have a big effect on babies' development. Maybe more people than you think! But it depends on your local culture. And sometimes it takes a certain amount of privilege to be able to prioritize finding those people, and it's simply not worth, say, paying more to switch daycares to find a teacher who won't gender your baby. Sometimes you do have to balance your priorities, and you can't know how much balancing it will actually take until you get there.

So, overall, my advice is just to do whatever you feel comfortable with! What sounds worse to you: gendering your baby, or fighting against society's attempts to gender them? Obviously when you have a trans child you fight for them, but it's a muddier question when the child doesn't care yet. Most of our queer friends aren't going full they/them gender neutral with their kids like we did, because they don't want to have to constantly explain that on top of all the shit they deal with for being queer. Instead they're just being extra firm about shopping in both sections of the store, not falling to stereotypes, and explaining to their child that they can decide to be something else if they want.

And there's a lot of options in between -- maybe you use they/them at home, but he/him at school, or maybe even she/her at home to balance out the school. Maybe you name and dress them gender-neutrally (or both fem and masc) and don't correct any assumptions. Maybe you tell one side of the family that you're going gender anarchy neutral so they should avoid gendered terms, but you only tell the other side that you're going feminist equality so they should make sure to gift both pretend kitchen toys and pretend power tools. It's the same as deciding in what situations you want to be out vs stay stealth/closeted.

When they're a baby it doesn't matter much either way (as long as you're not being sexist in your reactions to their behavior) because they're a baby, they could not care less. And then when they're old enough to pick their gender, you're hopefully giving them that choice regardless of what you did when they're a baby. It's true that the starting point you gave them may affect their gender journey, but that's true of gender neutrality as well.

So if you think it'll be too risky in the time and place in which you're raising your child, you really don't have to feel bad about not doing it. It's okay to save your energy for when your child really needs it. But if it's something you're committed to, it is possible! I'm so glad that my family was able to make this choice. I actually loved the conversations that it opened up with all sorts of people about gendering children! Even though I got in trouble one time for explaining gender too well to the children at the daycare I worked at, lol. And I know that gendering my kid as a baby would've made me more uncomfortable than any number of awkward conversations. I love knowing that her pink purple flower unicorn heart dresses are something she freely chose!!

[evilminji]

You know? I kinda wonder...

In a Self Insert type scenario, in Star Wars?

They would be MUCH more open to listening to "buddy, a storm's comin'" type warnings. Their Cannon knowledge, even if spotty, would probably echo with the Force and draw its attention to them somewhat. Because they KNOW.

KNOW what is going to happen. Not guess. Not assume. KNOW. Like the Force does. And that? Coupled with their inherent strangeness? Would make them the oddly colored duck of the flock, as it were. Not Super Important... buuuut? Easy to spot.

One of the Force's Blorbos.

Just cause, really. Cause they look funny. The Force doesn't even have a plan for um! But they turned up, ate the Force's food, and look at their wittle faaaace~☆! So it's keeping them. You know... assuming they survive.

Which?

Brings me to my point?

Since they LISTEN? The Force probably chatters like a mofo. Since a Self Insert would be anxious and constantly ASKING for wisdom. For help. A friend. Guidance of any kind. The Force would be draped around them like a particularly pleased with itself shoulder cat. A hovering backseat driver.

Because you DO keep asking, after all.

It's like muscle memory. Building strength. Not... not GREAT, in all actuality? Because Self Insert is avoiding making their OWN choices, probably out of fear? But on the OTHER hand? Both of them KNOW that there is literally a Sith Master like... less then 5 minutes away from where they live. Constantly.

And they are a Youngling.

So???

At What Point?? Does the Force? Engage "Fuck it, we take our baby and run" protocols?

Just? FULL ON "you stop midway through making your dinner, turn off the soup, pick up your kids, leave the house, and NEVER LOOK BACK". Because? Yes. The Jedi KNIGHTS and MASTERS may have vows to try and protect the people of the Republic?

BUT THE YOUNGLINGS DO NOT.

They, in fact, need to be PROTECTED.

And if the Force itself? Says "if you stay here, they WILL die."? You gotta go. Hopefully? You have enough warning to like... pack a ship. But, ya might NOT. Might just be "aaaand, everybody put down your pads! Suprise field trip to Anywhere Else! IMMEDIATELY. Single file, younglings. No running!" Like?

What would you do?

I kinda wanna see it.

Just this somber, vaguely haunted, crechling walking up to import figures like Madam Nu and Yoda going "if I tell you The Force told me we have to take the younglings, ALL OF THEM, and any history we think is worth preserving, and LEAVE... would you listen? Or would you let us die here?" With their tiny lil face and to serious expression.

Like a prophet of Doom.

And WHERE? Exactly? Are they supposed to go? Oh, simple. They are to Trust In The Force. And let it guide them. Out IN THE UNKNOWN REGIONS of wild space! Because THATS fine! Is this a joke?

No.

No the youngling is dead serious. Terrifyingly serious. Has been studying how to pilot a shop like they will have to do so THEMSELF. Asking questions that paint a concerning portrait of a child that fully intends to take their peers on this journey, with or without them.

And the Force? The Force says they MUST. That it is impossibly important they DO.

WELL THEN....

Do they... TELL anybody?

No. Not a single soul. Specifically, not a single soul In The Senate. Ah. Concerning! Guess we're? "Losing" a ship in the war? Oh dear. Such casualties. All those lives. Oh noooooo, and such and so forth. UNRELATED note! It's been FAR too long since this temple was cleaned! Unacceptable. You, random clones definitely not assigned to that ship we definitely just lost! Help us... clean!

Just?

The power of "fuck it, we took our ball and went home/left"? Should be USED more in fics. The Force TOTALLY knows where some sweet, sweet habitable planets are. You'll NEVER fuckin find them if they don't want you too! An entire temple of Jedi asking for the SAME thing? Versus a crusty lil shit?

They asked first. And nicely!

With THIS, balance is maintained. Not through FORCE. But through walking away for a bit. Allowing OTHERS to decide if this is what THEY want for themselves. Order 66 may or may not still happen? But? At most? All you would kill is the current fighting adults. Not the teachers. Not the elders. And CERTAINLY not the young.

They? Are far away. Where the Force is still clear and the light is strong. Growing up. Reflecting on what went wrong. Farming. Building a new temple with the Clones. You know, the ones who didn't have their comms. Never GOT that dreaded order. Get to live free men on a peaceful planet.

Cause historically? You send your kids AWAY from active wars zones. Places that are priority targets for your enemies. And if the Force itself is saying "move the babies"? Welp! Guess you gotta move um, don't ya? It's scary. Uncertain.

But it is an act of faith.

And I just? Wanna see Sith's plans just COMPLETELY fuckin implode? Because they could not plan for Faith. For Trust and Community and Hope. All the things they believe so trite. So worthless. The very things that would lead grown adults, POWERFUL PEOPLE, to actually? LISTEN to a mere youngling. Then follow their lead.

It would be?

Inconceivable to them.

@legitimatesatanspawn @babbling-babull @hypewinter @babbling-babull @hdgnj @starwarsblr @starwars

[theygender]

im going back to school in august do you have any advice on how to dyke it up in a collegiate manner. it’s been four years i dont remember what to do

My best advice:

Read the syllabus on the first day of class (even though it's boring 😔). Main things to look out for are: the best way to contact your professor, the course schedule (are you being taught by a sadist who made something due on day 1?), the class's late work policy, and how many points/what percentage of your grade each assignment is worth

Use this information to prioritize assignments. Assignments from classes that don't allow late work + assignments that are worth a lot of points are the ones with the highest priority

Done Is More Important Than Perfect!!! If you can't do something perfect, just get it done. Half ass it or turn it in incomplete if you need to, but turn it in. Scoring 50% is better for your grade than scoring 0%

Do your best to work ahead on lessons each week. I know it's hard. When all of your assignments are due at 11:59 PM on Sunday your brain will want so so badly to wait until Sunday to do all of them but that's how they get you. You will die

If you can find a way to break your lessons down into smaller pieces throughout the week it'll make things so much easier. Example from one of my current classes: watching one 15 minute video per day is WAY better than watching an hour and a half of videos in one sitting the same day your quiz is due

Trying not to put assignments off until the last minute can be hard, but at the very least you should try to start before tech support closes. Realizing that your shit is broken at 11:00 PM the day of is the worst feeling

Don't be afraid to contact your professor if you need to, most of them are glad to help. Make sure to check whether your question is answered in the syllabus first and include your course & section number in the email/message to make it easier for them to help you

On the other hand, if your professor is rude/intimidating when you reach out about issues just remember that you're both adults and you're paying them for a service. And if something is really wrong you can talk to their boss (the head of their department)

If you need to take notes and you don't know/remember how, look around online and find a note taking system that works for you. The Cornell notes method was helpful for me and it's really simple to do

If you have trouble sitting down to study/work, try the pomodoro method (25 min study + 5 min break) and some ambient music. Body doubling/"study with me" can also be helpful, and you can even find videos with all three of these combined. (My favorite are the video game ones. I am studying with Mr. Skyrim and we're doing pomodoros together)

Above all else, make sure to earn that degree in a dyke-honoring way 🫡 godspeed, soldier

[wardenparker]

The Unbearable Weight of Perfection, ch 5

Javi Gutierrez x female reader Co-written with @absurdthirst

When an accident of fate throws Javi G into the path of his soulmate, his instinct is to dive in head first. Adjusting to life as the fated partner of someone you barely know is going to be harder than either of you suspect, but anything worth having is worth working for. Isn't it?

(This story is heavily inspired by the lovely house museums that I work in every day and the fantastic few months that HBO was using our houses to film a TV show in fall! I spent each day on that set in wonder and I can't wait to share the experience with all of you through this story.)

Rating: E for Explicit! 18+ Word Count: 11.9k Warnings: *Blanket warnings for this story include: Cursing, alcohol, food, references to abusive family members -- i.e. Lucas, discussion of money/finances.* Financial disparity, a well intentioned surprise, fluff, friends, flirting with your spouse. Summary: Javi solves a problem with a grandiose surprise, and you're not sure how you feel about it at first. Notes: After a brief hiatus we are back! My laptop has been replaced and we should be smooth sailing from here. Happy Sunday, my lovelies!

Ch 1 ~ Ch 2 ~ Ch 3 ~ Ch 4

Thursday, May 1, 2025 

"Mrs. G, can we get you on set please?" The production assistant that works with Javi to make sure he has everything he needs and is wherever he needs to be has also been assigned to you in the month since work on the film started. Luckily Kyle is a nice kid and enthusiastic, and doesn't mind that he reliably has to knock loudly to make sure he doesn't walk in on the newlyweds in some sort of state of passion. 

"Sure, honey."

Javi has been on set for a little while already so you pocket your phone and hop up from your chair to head inside. The schedule for today has them shooting in just one room, but it's the main character's bedroom and the scene is the first of the clandestine love affair that is being shot. It makes sense that Tamara and Jason might have historical context questions. 

The halls of the great house are lined with rolls of cardboard – RAM board, they call it – to protect the precious antique wood and easily scratch floors. Whole pieces of the architecture like columns are wrapped up in it to shoulder height, and while the look of it was odd and off putting at first, it's familiar now. Like Hazelwood House has been wrapped up in a sort of temporary blanket to keep it safe. 

Up to the second floor and into the south wing of the house, you find Javi sitting with the two actors on an armchair and chaise lounge by the fireplace, staring at the footed panel in front of it. It still jars you to see the cast lounging on exact replicas of Hazelwood's furniture, but it's only because the museum rules (No touching!) have combined with a slight jealousy in your head. The furniture in this house really is fantastic.

“Sweetheart.” As soon as you come into the room, Javi is lighting up, his eyes widen with sparkling happiness as he quickly stands. Moving towards you to meet you halfway in the room, although he refrains from kissing you since he had been told you might not like it at work. “Hey handsome.” Even murmured softly into the air between you as Javi wraps his arms around you for a quick hug, you feel a little more relaxed just being in the same place as him. “You called and I came. How can I help?”

“We have a question about the fireplace.” Even if he doesn’t kiss you, his fingers caress your wrist lovingly as he turns you towards the object in question. “What is this and why is it here?” He asks, pointing to a wood and fabric screen that could not be utilized while there is a fire crackling in the hearth. While Hazelwood has been extremely accommodating, there was to be no real fires in the hearths due to some of the chimneys being blocked off and the risk of an out of control fire being too great. All of the fires would be added by CGI in post production but Javi had noticed the screens still in front of the hearth and needed to know if they would risk it during a fire or if it would be moved and what purpose it served.

"That is a fire screen." The warm radiance of him standing next to you is a fire unto itself and it's a pity you're on set instead of in your shared trailer so you can't melt into him.

"Like...for embers?" Jason asks, brow furrowed. "But it's wood." 

"And cloth!" Tamara objects. 

"I know." You manage to stifle a laugh, but you had the same thought the first time you saw them. "It's technically the predecessor to today's metal fire screens. In function, it's the same. But the main focus here was in keeping direct flame off of people's faces." Shrugging slightly at how silly it might sound to a modern person is the best you can do. "Being flush from the fire or getting any kind of color was looked down on. The paler your complexion, the more obvious it is that you don't have to work or exert yourself in any way."

“So warming the room but not over exposing them to the flames.” Javi frowns slightly. “So they would have the fire going and having the screen in front of it?” He asks, tilting his head towards you for the answer. “We want to make sure we get the shot right.”

"If you want the shot without the screen in place, there could be a throwaway remark about Tamara being flush?" You suggest, chewing your lip as you tilt your head up at him.

“I don’t think that’s necessary.” Javi looks between the principal cast and then over at the director. “Do you?”

"Screen will be better without live flames." The director hums after a minute of thinking. "Won't have to work as hard on manufacturing the look of the fire. We'll keep the screen."

Javi smiles as he looks back at you. “Thank you for your expertise.” He hums, reaching for your hand to kiss the back of it.

"Do you mind if I stay to watch?" The filming process is slow but fascinating to you, and these people – with the small exceptions of the egotistical producers and snobbish director – are very fun to spend time with. It's much more fun to be here on set even with the slow progress, than it is to be in your trailer.

Javi is immediately nodding. “Yes.” He agrees, knowing that no one will argue with him. He’s had carte blanche on set, especially after making some re-writes that everyone swears will clench the Oscars in multiple categories.

"Yes I can stay?" You melt into a soft smile and wish that the aforementioned snobby director weren't in the room so you could kiss him. "Thank you. I'd much rather be here."

He smiles and squeezes your hand. “You can be wherever I am.” He promises, not caring if the director would rather you not be on set. He’s a little stiff and Javi can tell he doesn’t exactly approve of your soulmate status for whatever reason, but he doesn’t care.

"Come sit!" Tamara pats the chaise lounge beside her immediately. Since everything that happened on that first day, she's been an eager and bubbly friend. "We might need you for something else."

Javi smirks as he lets go of your hand so you can sit down next to your friend. “Did you run your errand like you needed?” He asks you, knowing you had been wanting to take care of something.

"I did." Though it wasn't exactly fun or easy. "The bus was running a little late but I managed to get everything done and sent off my sister's birthday present." You may not be close, but she's still your sister.

“You did not take the car?” Javi frowns immediately at you, sure that he had given you his keys before rushing off to the set this morning.

"I'm okay with the bus while my car is in the shop," you promise him. "And the car from the studio always brings you home, so there was no need to worry about that." Having a driver is a very helpful convenience, especially for Javi who likes to use the drive to prepare for the work day. Since your car has been in the shop for three days now, you've just been going to and from the studio with him, but this morning you needed to get to the post office. He had handed you the keys to his luxury sports car like it was nothing, but the mere thought of anything happening to the expensive automobile had you using a bus pass instead.

He’s not happy with your answer, and Tamara and Jason both grin as they watch the interaction between you. “Honey, what’s wrong with your car?” She huffs, hoping to distract.

"So far?" You let out a huff of a laugh. The director has gone to get a cup of coffee so you have a little time to breathe. "The engine. Just...in general."

Javi opens his mouth and then closes it. Deciding that he will take care of things and pulls out his phone.

Seeing your husband duck behind his phone with a look of concentration isn't unusual, so you pay it no mind and keep chatting lightly with Tamara. The cast had invited you and Javi to join them for drinks after shooting on Friday night and you're excited to go.

Javi doesn’t look up from his phone until the director comes back. “Clear the set.” He calls out and Javi pops up out of his chair. “Let’s go watch from the sidelines.”

There are a half dozen chairs set up in the hall behind the camera monitors for watching, and one of them bears Javi’s name. You hop up into the one beside him to hold his hand during the rehearsal of the scene before it gets filmed. “Everything okay, love?” You ask, not wanting to pry about whatever he was doing on his phone but still checking in.

“Perfect.” Javi tells you, looking over at you with a giddy smile. “Just taking care of something.”

“Something exciting?” You guess, but leave it at that.

“I think so, but it might be a little boring.” He admits with a chuckle. “We will see tomorrow.”

“Nothing you do is ever boring.” Surprising, frequently, and often lovely. But never boring.

“You would be surprised.” He grins proudly, squeezing your hand and the lifting it to kiss the back of it right as the director yells “Action!”

The scene is full of tension, but it has to be done angle by angle so the many takes come one after another in slow succession. Nothing seems to be done quickly in the movie industry, that's been obvious to you since day one.

He sees you shift in your chair and he leans over. “It can be so boring at times.” He murmurs in your ear. “I asked Nick how he doesn’t scream sometimes with so many takes.”

"I think it's fascinating," you admit, whispering back to make sure you don't disturb anything. "Watching how one gesture or a change of inflection can transform the whole scene? It's stunning."

He chuckles and hums softly, loving how you are enjoying yourself as you watch them reset the scene again. “Sometimes art takes time to perfect.” He admits. “First takes are like rough drafts.”

“Like the muslin before a gown.” In the days that you had dreamed of designing clothes, those rough muslin forms had been such loving work on the floor of your bedroom at home.

He tilts his head and tries to understand what you are meaning. “Muslin? The fabric that they used for undergarments?”

You nod, somehow managing to keep the giggle out of your voice so it won’t carry. “I was taught to design clothing by making a muslin form first. Like a rough draft. To make sure the design works before cutting into the expensive fabric and whatnot.”

“You make clothes?” That’s a new fun fact he didn’t know about you and he lights up as he memorizes it. “So that is why you have been the in costume trailer a lot?”

“I used to.” The light in your eyes dims ever so slightly, but you keep smiling. He doesn’t know all the ways that your art was taken from you. Piece by piece.

“Why did you stop?” He frowns, sensing the way there is a shift in your mood. It’s slight, but your hand stiffens in his.

“My parents,” you tell him, honestly despite it being harsh. “My step-dad convinced my mom that art school was pointless. So they refused to pay for it. I ended up studying history instead.” Which has worked out for you, obviously, and you do love it. But if you had been able to study fashion the way you wanted? Maybe you would be a textiles conservator or a costumer for a living history museum by now. Who knows?

“That is not right.” Javi immediately defends you. “You should have been able to study whatever you wished.” He feels passionately about that, since he was also shoehorned into a role he didn’t not want in his own family.

"Well, I agree, but there's nothing we can do about it now." The best you can do is shrug, having put the dream aside a long time ago. Maybe one of these days you'll look into getting a second-hand or lower end sewing machine. Make yourself a few things, or even make them as gifts. Javi would probably jump so far into the idea that he'd suggest one of the rooms in your now-oft-dreamt-about future house be a sewing room. He's very sweet like that. Maybe you'll ask for your birthday, but that's in the future.

He is about to suggest that you go back to school, but he doesn’t want to make it seem like he’s hoping you quit your job. Selfishly, he likes having you right here every day. “Maybe one day you can show me what you’ve designed?”

"Maybe..." You nudge his shoulder slightly, cheeks warm from the compliment of his interest. "I'll dig out my old sketchbooks tonight? If you really want to see."

“Yes.” Javi immediately answers, grinning when you giggle slightly. “I want to see all of them. Do you have them at the cottage or do we need to go back to your apartment?” The move has been day by day, you deciding what you want to do with your furniture but your most pressing items already in the cottage alongside his own.

"We should stop at the cottage on the way home, if that's okay?" As usual, the studio's driver will be taking you, but he never seems to mind making a small detour before leaving Santa Barbara. The ride back down the coast to the house – or cottage, as Javi calls it – is always a nice way to relax together after a work day.

“Absolutely.” He nods and smiles. “What do you want to do for dinner?”

"Maybe I can cook tonight?" He often likes to go out or have something delivered, and that's lovely. But tonight you like the idea of having a domestic night at home with your husband. After all, it's not like you lack for groceries. Or anything.

“Do you need anything?” He immediately wonders which is the closest store to the cottage, or if you would prefer one near your old apartment.

"We have a full kitchen, love." You promise him with a kiss to his cheek. "I already know what I'm going to make."

“I thought that was all the charcuterie items you wanted for the dinner with Nick and Olivia?” He had been warned away from the fridge drawers, making him pout as he searched for late night snacks.

"There is more than just snacks, my love." He had simply bypassed the steaks, brussels sprouts, potatoes, and assorted other ingredients in the kitchen because he isn't very interested in cooking just in general. That's perfectly fine, of course, but it means warning him off the things he can snack on without cooking them if you've bought them for a particular reason.

“Oh.” He rolls his eyes at himself and nods. “Only if you want to cook.” He hums. “You might be tired after work.”

In truth, it amounts to wanting to do something sweet for him because he does so much for you. Javi gives and gives and takes pride in it, but even with the generous pay from the studio your income doesn't come close to his. 

Do you share bank accounts now? Of course. He had a credit card opened on his account in your name. But so far you've only used it for groceries or household necessities. Anything else feels...greedy. 

"I won't be, mi amor," you promise him, setting those thoughts aside and resolving to make a nice dinner for you and your soulmate.

“We should build one of those kitchen outdoors.” He mentions causally, as if he’s talking about a simple weekend project. “Since you like to cook. I’ve seen some amazing ones. We could have it next to the pool.” The pool is currently being dug next to the cottage. In front of it actually. Wanting you to swim whenever you want, it’s now become a priority.

"We could definitely do that." In between takes now, you no longer have to whisper. At least for a short time. And that means you lean a little more into Javi's side and breathe a happy sigh. "It would be great for parties."

“Good!” He has expected you to huff about the idea, since it would be expensive and you seem to be determined to not spend his money. “Why don’t we talk to the architect?”

"We have a meeting next week. Why don't we add it to the things we want to talk to her about?" The quiet reason you're not immediately downplaying this idea is that you can immediately imagine having pool parties for your future children out there, with the patio bustling and a little outdoor kitchen right at hand. It makes you feel so dreamy that you just can't say no.

“Perfect.” Now that the director as given them the slight changes he wants to the scene, he moves back behind the camera and calls for silence on the set again.

There is nothing but utter silence in the hallway during the actual take. You cuddle into Javi's side and just watch the monitor. Having him close even without talking is a special kind of intimacy and one that you're starting to find that you love. The atmosphere of the set can be so tense at times that these little moments of intimacy feel stolen.

The wheels in Javi’s brain are starting to spin and he hums to himself as an idea for another script jumps to life. Even as he watches his latest being brought to the screen in front of him.

It’s a beautifully done scene, one full of yearning and those first pangs of something new that make your heart ache for the characters. Javi’s script is sensational on its own but Tamara and Jason are so good together that you almost feel like you’re intruding on their privacy just by watching the monitor. Which is absolutely as it should be.

Javi plays with your rings while he watches the scene. Knowing it by heart, he’s seen it in his head for so long, it’s almost boring to see it now. Thinking about that new idea as he grins to himself.When “Cut!” is called again, you nudge his jaw with your nose flash him a grin. “It’s a beautiful script, love.”

"Huh?" He is started out of his musings and he glances at you in confusion. "Oh, uh, thank you." He realizes what you are talking about and he grins. "Sorry, I was thinking about something else."

“Is everything okay?” He hasn’t mentioned being out of sorts or unwell or anything, but you still ask. Javi is, as they say, a dreamer. He might be far off in an imaginary land right now just as easily as he might be worrying about something.

“Everything is good.” He smiles again so you don’t worry. “I have an idea for a new script.”

“Really?” Your eyes light up in surprise. “A new idea already?”

“Umm hmm.” Your surprised delight makes him so much more appreciative of the support you’ve already shown him. “I need to jot some rough ideas for the timeline down.”

"I already can't wait." And you can't believe that he could come up with new ideas that fast, either. It seems like scripts should be so much harder to put together than just a single spark of an idea.

“Good.” He nods. “I will probably be asking you a million questions.”

"Oh?" That surprises you again, but as the director makes adjustments and gets ready to do another take, you sort of revel in the absurdity of the whole thing. You're living beyond your wildest dreams, after all. "And why will you be asking me questions, of all people?"

He smiles at you like the answer should be obvious and you are so sweet for not figuring it out. “Because it will be about you.” He hums and winks before looking back at the monitor as the scene is called to action.

You're still staring at him in abject confusion a full three minutes later when the director calls 'Cut!" again, and despite probably looking like a mad woman you don't feel any saner or closer to an answer. Which is why you end up blurting out "Why?" The second you're able to talk again.

Javi turns towards you again, wondering if you are upset at the idea of being his muse. For so long, anyone who learned of his desire to write movies would always beg to be his muse, sometimes even using seduction to try to sway him. You and Nick seem to be the only people that seemed uncomfortable by the idea, Nick because he wasn’t sure if it would work. “Art school.” He explains. “The impossible choice between honoring your parent’s wishes and following your heart.”

"Then I hope your character decides to do more with it than darn socks and mend thrifted clothes." There is worry on his face that you wish you could reach out and smooth away. Like a swipe of your thumb might lifts all of the clouds of concern right out of his mind. "I'm honored that you think I'm worth being inspired by, sweetheart."He bites his lip, trying to search your eyes to see if you are just being polite. “You should do more than darn socks or mend thrifted clothes.” He murmurs. “You should do what you want.”

"Maybe." He is disarmingly sweet. He has been since the day you met him, and a month of marriage has not dulled it in any way. "I was thinking of asking for a used sewing machine for my birthday this year. Since...I never really have anyone to ask but I hoped you might wonder what to get me?"

"A sewing machine." He is immediately committing that to memory and nodding. "You have me to ask now." He promises, deciding that he will throw you one hell of a birthday party for this year.

"And you have me." For whatever the hell that's worth. Things seem both awash with prospects and simultaneously in the middle of a weird sort of limbo right now. At least for you.

Javi's phone buzzes and he jumps slightly, not expecting it. Chuckling at himself as he pulls it out of his pocket, his eyes light up as he sees the number on the screen. "Oh! It's here!" Bolting out of the chair to take the call.

“It?” You jump out of your skin right along with him, clambering down from your chair to follow.

"Hello?" He is off to the races as he answers the phone. "Yes! Hi! Are you outside?" He asks, hearing you following him, but it's a given that you need to be here as well. "Yes? Already? And the bow?" He is giddy and practically skips a step. "Thank you! I am on the way."

“Javi, where are you going?” He’s headed straight down the hallway toward the main entrance of the house and you barely make it to the door behind him. Down a half dozen stairs and out to the port-cochere, there are plenty of cars and trailers parked out in the front of Hazelwood House but the gate has opened to let two more in.

Two cars. One of which has a giant bow on the roof.

Javi’s eyes light up and he thinks it’s perfect. Your favorite color just happened to be available in the same model as his own car and only a few cities over on another car lot. They had managed to ship the car here today and he spins around to you. “Surprise!”

"Oh my god..." You can barely huff out the words, watching a metallic blue version of Javi's beloved Porsche convertible be driven onto the grounds of the museum. You should feel awed. You should be such immense gratitude. And you do, really you do. But the twist of discomfort in your stomach is so sharp that it almost makes you nauseous. "You bought me a car?" Why? And why does that make you almost want to cry instead of being excited?

The wide grin on his face falters slightly when you don’t immediately start jumping up and down while screaming in excitement. “You– uh, didn’t want to drive my car.” He explains. “So I thought that you should just have your own. You would drive that, right?” He asks.

"I don't like driving your car because I'm terrified of something happening while I'm in it..." He looks absolutely crestfallen but you really don't know what to do right now. He went completely over your head to solve a problem and landed on an answer that makes you uncomfortable without meaning to.

“Something happening?” He rushes back over to you and grabs your waist gently. “Sweetheart, it’s a car. A tool.” He insists. “If something happened, I would only care that you are safe.” His brows lift. “And the car has a fantastic safety rating.” He adds, as is that will bolster his argument.

"I can't imagine you not caring if your million-dollar car was in an accident." Okay, you have no idea how much the car actually costs. But it's a Porsche convertible. It has to be a lot. And expensive things -- or at least things that were expensive to you -- have been a stress point for your entire life. "It's very sweet of you, baby. But when I needed to take my car to the shop, the solution didn't need to be buying me a new car."

“The car wasn’t that expensive.” He protests and the delivery driver of the car gets out of the driver’s seat and starts walking towards you and Javi. “Your car was...tired.” He reminds you.

"Say what you mean." You shrug. "My car is a piece of shit. But it was a piece of shit that I worked hard to afford and was proud of because it was proof of all that work."

His shoulders slump, feeling horrible for making you feel like your efforts didn’t matter. “I’m - I’m sorry.” He murmurs softly. “I just wanted my wife in a safe, reliable car instead of riding a bus. And I-“ he shakes his head. “I’ll have the car returned.”

"Amor," you tip his chin back up with two fingers to look at you, hating the way he looks when he pouts. It breaks your heart to upset him at all but this was a very big surprise. “Is it already paid for?”

His eyes slide to the right guiltily. “Sí.” He sighs. “But I think they will buy it back.” For loss, of course. They would take at least twenty grand off just because they had taken it off the lot to be delivered. The last thing you want is for him to think you're mad. He did something deeply overboard but he did it out of love and a want to be helpful. So you put your own arms around his waist in turn, and the expression on your face turns into something like a lopsided smile of exasperation. He is so terribly sweet, your excited puppy of a soulmate. He really is. "If it's already paid for, then I'll find out how much the shop will pay me for the parts from my junker. Can I just ask you one thing, mi amor?”

He bites his lip, feeling the rebuke coming but at least you aren’t yelling. “Anything.”

“The next time we have a big decision to make, can we make it together?” You squeeze his waist gently and lean up to kiss his cheek, trying to make sure he understands you’re not mad — just exceedingly confused. “We’re partners, aren’t we?”

“Yes, yes we are.” Guilt floods him and he has the decency to look sheepish. “I- I got caught up and I wanted you to have-“ he lets go of your hip with one hand to gesture to the car. “I thought it was a sign they had one in your favorite color.”

"It's very beautiful." When he had found out your favorite color was blue you thought for sure he was going to theme every little thing in your lives to shade of that color, but so far it's been limited to him buying a whole new bedding set in shimmery blue for your bed. You had loved that surprise, so you can see how he had thought right away that you would love this, too. "I'm not upset, Javi. I'm just really surprised. When you said you were going to spoil me when we got married, I didn't think it would be big things, too."

“Why would it not be with big things?” He asks, concerned that you could think that he would leave you to hand big things on your own.

"I–I don't know." Suddenly you're the one feeling guilty, and frowning deeply because the answer occurs to your out of nowhere, almost like you're being punched in the gut. "Probably...because...I've always had to do the big things for myself."

He hates the way your face looks so lost, so uncertain. Javi leans in and kisses you softly. “Now you have me to do the big things…with.” He stresses the last word, reassuring you that he heard your request.

“Come on, you.” The weight of a handful of unexpected revelations is still heavy on your shoulders, but the world seems a lot more manageable when Javi is smiling and you’d prefer to keep it that way. “Show me the car.”

Now that he’s halfway sure you will accept the car, he’s grabbing your hand and dragging you over to the deliver driver to get the keys and thank him profusely. “It is just like mine.” He promises. “Although your car has the cooled seats!”

The car dealer deposits the keys in Javi’s hand when he walks you over, smiling and chatty as car salesmen at wont to be. At some point the directive that this car is for you must have been given because the salesman’s attention moves firmly to explaining all of the special features of the complex car to you.

Your car is the same year model, although there are a few more bells and whistles on yours. The grey and black leather seats look amazing and it’s obvious that the dealer has just removed all the protective plastic before delivering it. It has that deeply satisfying new car smell, although that will soon disappear if you drive with the top down. “Your husband asked for the same model he has, with a few upgrades.” The salesman explains to you, as though he hasn’t just explained the entire car tip-to-tail. “Including the manual transmission. Of course, Mrs. Gutierrez, if you prefer—”

“Before you insinuate that I won’t be able to drive the car my husband has gifted to me, be assured that my ability to drive a manual sports car is not in question.”

Javi looks smugly proud of that fact and he nods. “Absolutely.”Accordingly, Javi drops the key into your hand and presses a kiss to your cheek. You thank the salesman for the delivery, realizing belatedly that the thing that going to make you keep this car is fifty percent Javi's sweet gesture and fifty percent spite for this salesman who thinks you can't handle it.

The salesman leaves in the other car, climbing in the passenger seat and Javi grins. “Want to take it for a test drive?” He asks excitedly."Don't we have to go back to work?" Javi's excitement is always the sweetest height of any moment, but there are still responsibilities to take into account. "How about I drive us home tonight instead of taking the studio car?"

He pouts for a moment and then nods. “That makes more sense.” He agrees, even though he wants to take a ride with you now. “Maybe we can drive around the coast and find a new restaurant to try?”

"That sounds perfect." You won't say so because you know Javi's idea of a new place to try is always fancy, but Alex had told you about a new burger place on the Pacific Coast Highway. Just a shack on the beach. It sounds like something Javi will love if he even ever tried it -- but those aren't the places that he thinks to try.

“Are you sure it’s okay?” He asks, glancing at the car and then back at you.

"It's a gift from my soulmate." You wrap one hand around his arm and tuck the keys into your pocket carefully with the other. "Even if it was unexpected, it's still lovely."

“Okay.” He relaxes into your body and smiles. “I was hoping you would like it. They are very reliable cars.”

"I know you love your car." He does, and you had really just chalked it up to him being a sports car guy, but Javi's obsession with safety is one more thing that is very sweet about him. He really cares about the people closest to him. You glance back at the car, which was neatly parked on the edge of the other staff vehicles, and then back at him. "It will take a little getting used to, for me. But I love that you want to take care of me."

“You’re my soulmate.” He huffs. “Of course I want to take care of you.” He promises. “I want to give you the world.”

“I’m still getting used to that,” you admit, leaning on his arm a little out of a dear and sort of desperate wish to be close to him as you head back down the hall to whatever scene work is being done right now. “And I love you, too.”******

Alex wasn’t on the primary set today, but he was working with the secondary camera crew and the assistant director to shoot some of the exterior scenes, so he had seen the delivery of the car from a distance.

“New car! Who got a new car?” He demands, knocking on the trailer door and throwing it open a second later to charge inside like an over eager puppy. He’s a total gear head and loves cars.

"Mrs. G." Jason reports, lounging across the sofa in their shared trailer with a book open and resting on his chest. He'd barely closed his eyes for a nap when Alex came rumbling in. "You go see it yet?"“No! I have to get out of this costume.” He is pulling off the elaborate jacket and starts to unbutton the crisp white shirt.

“Go easy!” Jason reminds him, sitting up on the sofa and shoving a bookmark into the spine of the book without mercy. “Heather will kill you if you rip anything.”

“Dude, the horsepower of the car.” He grins. “Maybe she’ll let me test drive it.”

"You might have a better chance at that if you hadn't crushed the cover of her notebook the other day just by holding it weird." Jason chuckles. He pulls himself to standing with a grunt and moves to grab his water bottle off the nearby shelf.

“I didn’t mean to!!!!!” He insists, whining and pouting at the mention of that incident. He really hasn’t meant to.

“I know, man.” Jason can’t stop cackling now, even as he pats his co-star on the back. “I know. But it’s never not gonna be funny.”

In his excitement and exuberance, Alex can be a little…destructive. He rolls his eyes and sighs. “Then I’m never gonna drive that car.” He groans.

"Maybe she'll take you for a ride," Jason offers instead. Alex is just pulling on a t-shirt when he motions back toward the trailer door with a wave of one hand. "I mean she basically adopted you as the brother she never wanted right?" He snorts when Alex swats at him defensively and the two guys tumble out of their trailer and into the spring sunlight. "Just ask, man."

“Maybe.” He is rushing towards Javi’s trailer, still amused that the writer has his own space. Although it makes sense, in a way. Changes are quick, printed out right on site.

You groan at the impatient knocking on the trailer door, having to pause what you're doing with one hand working open Javi's pants and the other tangled in his curls. "One second!" You call back, pouting about being interrupted.

“Hurry up!” Alex chirps happily, practically wringing his hands together. Eager to see the car up close. “Stop kissing your soulmate!”

"Shut up!" Is the retort that comes back through the door, and after a minute or two of shuffling you pull the door open to find both leading men on your steps. "Yes, gentlemen?"

Jason chuckles, finding both you and Javi behind you looking flustered. Having some inkling it was much more than just kissing. “Saw the new car.” He explains. “Alex is about to crawl out of his skin to see it.”

"Alex, someday when I meet your soulmate, I'm going to ask them if they are a dog person right off the bat," you chuckle with thinly veiled amusement at the way the Hollywood star is practically wagging his tail to see the new vehicle. "Alright," you were already reaching for the key out of sight, and now you dangle it in front of his face teasingly. "Let's go check her out. She needs a name anyway. Might as well make it a group project."

“Oh god!” His eyes light up and he tries to snatch the keys out of your hand, but you pull them back. “Don’t name her something stupid.”

“What would be a stupid name for a car?” You ask him, entirely amused by his clearly very strong feelings on the subject.

“Bertha.” He chuckles. “I know Eleanor is popular because of Gone in Sixty Seconds…” he glances at Javi. “But don’t name her that.”

"Bertha is a character on my favorite tv show." You shake your head at the suggestion even as you loop your arm around Javi's waist to walk together. "I usually let a car tell me what their name is. You know – get in and the first song that plays on the first drive is where you get the name from. That sort of thing."

“Ohhhhhh that’s a good way to do it!” Alex plugs up and he’s turning around and walking backwards as he quizzes you. “Favorite genre of music?”

"It sounds so basic to say rock, but it's true." There is also a healthy interest into any kind of music that tells a story, but in general? It's rock. "90s alt rock, grunge, punk...but I'll try anything that comes on a good recommendation."

“Janie.” Alex grins widely, eyes alight with glee. “The car’s name is gonna be Janie.”

"How can you possibly guess that?" Jason huffs, crossing his arms like it's his car that has been named and not yours.

“Janie’s got a guuuun.” Alex croons off key on purpose as he continues to bound backwards like an excited puppy. “Most dealers set the XM radio to the 80s or 90s station, depending on the price tag of the car. Javi’s car is easily ninety k, and Aerosmith released the song in 1989 but it topped charts in 1990, so they play it on both the 80s and 90s stations.”

"We'll see." Never mind that the 80s and 90s stations are usually what you listen to, you ask the universe for one single second to make it anything else so that Alex will be wrong. You love the guy – he's funny and a great friend – but he doesn't need his head getting about bigger.

He doesn’t take offense, chuckling happily as he spins around and he whistles just as soon as the sparkling new car comes into the view, bow still sitting on the hood. “Ohhhh she is puuuuuuuuuurdy.” He drawls out with an exaggerated Texas accent.

"I have to admit," you give Javi's side a gentle squeeze. "The color is perfect."

“Good.” He beams. “It was this or a car that looked like pink or purple color.”

"I mean," you laugh, watching Javi's face morph at his obvious distaste for that choice. "I do like pink and purple. But blue is my favorite. And the gray interior is gorgeous." Stepping up to the car, you smooth a tentative hand down one side and bite your lip. Is this really your car? Did he really do this? But you click the unlock button on the fob in your hand and sure enough, the door unlocks instantly. Yep. He really did it.

Even as Alex drools over the car, Javi is watching you. Eager to see your reaction now that the reality of it being yours is starting to sink in.

It is the same as his car, after all. You've been in his car dozens of times now. But opening the driver's side send a ping of nerves through you just as much as it does anticipation. After all, the car was a gift. And it is much safer than your old one. Just because you scraped and saved for that shitbox did not make it a good car by any means.

You slide into the driver's seat and actually sigh with how comfortable it is.

“Heated and cooled seats.” Javi reminds you and Alex starts cracking up. “You got the coochie coolers, hellllllll yeah mama!” He slaps Javi on the back. “Just what she needs in the California summer.”

"Please never call them that again," you snort, shaking your head at Alex before you lean back in the front seat and look up at the three men that you now spend as much time with as anyone else in the world. "Okay. We ready for this?"

"Hell yeah." Jason pumps one fist in the air. "Do it!" 

"Here we go..." Turning over the ignition is akin to a cat purring out its very best first impression, and when the screen blinks to life the station that is listed is, in fact, 90s Alt Rock. Javi leans in to ear the song, eager to learn what is playing. The unique sound of Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers comes through the speakers in studio quality sound.

"Last dance with Mary Jane, one more time to kill the pain  I feel summer creepin' in and I'm tired of this town again"

Jason smirks, Javi’s head tilts curiously, and you just start to laugh as Alex crows with victory.

“Alright, fine,” you can’t stop shaking your head and laughing as Mary Jane’s Last Dance pours through the speakers. “I guess the car’s name is Janey.” It’s better than Mary Jane, after all, and the radio determined the winner anyway.

“Janey?” Javi asks, wondering if you are joking since you had wanted to thwart Alex.

“Those are the rules.” When you shrug you’re still laughing. Mostly because the chance of that happening was way too small to ignore. “I don’t particularly want to name her Mary Jane, but Janey is cute.”

“It could always be MJ.” Jason pipes up with a grin tossed Alex’s way.

“But then it sounds like you’re naming your car after Michael Jackson.” Alex points out, as if that proves that he wins.

“Or MJ from Spider-Man.” Jason counters with a shrug. “Short for Mary Jane.”

“I always liked Gwen Stacy.” You counter, just to watch the unabashed, rather gobsmacked way both Alex and Jason start to sputter in protest. “I’m kidding guys, oh my god. Calm down. MJ is good. I like MJ.”

Javi chuckles and pats the cloth hood of the car. “MJ.” He hums. “Why don’t you let her hair down, Sweetheart?”

Placing a kiss on his cheek, you slide into the car and shut the door. Turning over the ignition feels like you're sitting on an engine-powered cloud. Just like Javi's car, the buttery leather cradles you and you really can't deny the comfort. You tell yourself it's practical. Your husband – your soulmate can afford to buy you a new car when your old one is dying, and he got you something safe and stylish without you ever having to ask. Most partners would be thrilled. 

So why not embrace it? 

The second your foot presses the gas, you suddenly have no trouble with the idea of this car being your reality.

Javi watches as you squeal out of your parking spot, grinning wildly as Alex shouts encouragement in excitement.

Almost the second you pull out, the wind seems to change. The world morphs around you a little. And yeah, you like driving. You always have. But this? This feels like flying, and the only thing you’re missing is Javi beside you.

“Well damn, she left you behind.” Jason snorts, slapping Javi on the back, but your husband just chuckles. “She’ll be back. She’s just getting a feel for her baby.”

“It’s a hell of a gift.” Jason observes, arms crossed, as he watches you turn a wide circle on the other end of the parking lot.

“She’s worth it.” Javi promises with an indulgent smile. “First time I’ve ever felt truly loved.” The realization had been astounding. You accepted him, flaws and all and even put up with him now when you were exasperated by him buying you a car without your input. There is never a moment where you make him feel like he’s not enough.

Jason and Alex, for alternate reasons, sigh with longing and mumble agreements. Jason has been developing a sizable crush since beginning work on this film and hasn’t said a goddamn word to anyone — while Alex has been having a quiet personal crisis about the possibility of never being able to find his soulmate. He envies people like Javi and Dieter Bravo. People who work through their fears and end up happy and in love. He just doesn’t know if that will ever happen to him.

The car comes roaring back towards the three men and Javi chuckles when the other two step back cautiously but he knows you will stop. The braking system on the car is amazing, and he fully trusts you. “How does she feel?”

At some point during your test drive you brought the top down, and you’re grinning at him unapologetically from the front seat of the convertible. “The only thing that would make it more perfect is having you in the front seat with me.”

“Are you ready to leave?” He asks, shooting you a matching grin and lifting his brows. “Alex might cry if you don’t take him for a spin.”

“Don’t we have more work to do?” If you’ve both been dismissed from set that is news to you, but you wouldn’t be opposed to a drive.

“We are done for the day.” Alex is bouncing on his toes and edging closer to the car. Eager to get into the passenger seat if he can’t get behind the wheel. “Secondary too.”

Looking up to Javi, you flash a gleaming grin and shrug your shoulders. “Do you guys want to go for a drive? Head out to the beach and maybe get dinner?”

“You- uh, don’t mind?” Jason looks surprised and at the same time, a little relieved that you just aren’t dragging Javi away.

“Why would I mind? We’re friends, aren’t we?” It’s a little heartbreaking the way Jason always seems surprised to be included in things, but that’s like half the reason you’re damned and determined to always make sure he knows he’s invited. “If everybody is done, maybe we can catch the girls and we can all go together?”

Javi chuckles. “We won’t all fit in this car, but why don’t we go to the house and pick up my car?” He grins at Alex and Jason. “You two can take turns driving mine.” He offers with a waggle of his brows.

Before you can say another word, the boys are agreeing and sprinting off to their trailers for their stuff so fast that they leave behind a dust cloud.

“Well,” you laugh, shaking your head as they go. “We should go tell the girls. You just gave those two the biggest excitement of the week.”

“We’ll have to get them to the house, but then we can let them ride in my car.” He offers as he leans against the driver’s door and offers you a smirk. “You look sexy behind the wheel. Knew you would.”

“Yeah?” He’s practically beaming at you, and you can’t help but feel a little giddy about it in turn. “What else do you think about me being sexy doing?”

He bites his lip, his expression sliding into something a little more…carnal. “When you walk around the cottage in those little outfits. When you wash your make up off every night and you lean over the sink to make sure you got all your eyeliner.” He grunts slightly, obviously infatuated. “Painting your toenails.”

A little giggle wells in your chest and you smirk at him in turn. “So…any time you get a good view of my ass or get to look down my shirt?”

His eyes dip down your shirt and linger for a moment before he looks back into your eyes. “Guilty.” He admits with a chuckle.

“That’s totally fine,” you promise him, grin spreading a little wider. “I can’t wait for the pool to be ready so I can check out your whole drawer of speedos in action.”

“I have a favorite pair.” He admits shamelessly.

"Oh yeah?" As much as you hate to, you climb out of the parked car temporarily so you and Javi can go inside and hunt down the rest of your friends. "Which one?"

“They are black and white striped.” He tells you. “I think they make my small butt look bigger.”

Barely stopping yourself before you snort, you lean into Javi's side and pat his 'small butt' lovingly. "I think your ass is perfect, amor. Don't worry about that."

“You like it?” He perks up slightly, surprised that you would even care about his mild body issues.

"Do I like my husband's ass?" Even pretending to think about it only lasts a minute, and you slide your hand into his back pocket to give him a little squeeze. Sure, Javi doesn't have the biggest or perkiest butt in the world – but it's lean and tight just like the rest of him. "No. No, I take that back. I don't like it. I love it."

He chuckles, a little self conscious and a little proud of his butt that you like so much. “Yours is much better.” He promises, his own hand sliding down to your lower back and he grins but continues down to squeeze your ass.

"I guess it's a very good thing we like each other's assets so much," you joke, giggling at your own bad pun.

Javi laughs at the corny joke, nodding happily. “Go find your friend, sweetheart.” He urges you. “I’ll find Tamara.”

Moira is, as always, easy to find. At the reception desk inside the front door of the house, she is sitting with her novel of the week and her enormous pink Stanley full of iced water. The little cherry cover has been flicked off the top and she's chewing the tip of her straw between her teeth as she reads something particularly exciting.

"Can I interrupt?" Sometimes being interrupted in the middle of reading something exciting is the worst and you don't want to do that to her.

She’s immediately marking her spot and closing the book, looking at you expectantly. “What can I do for you, Mrs. Hollywood?” She teases with a grin.

“Hush.” But you just roll your eyes, grinning with that effervescent sunny aura that life with Javi had given you. “I was going to ask if you wanted to come hang out tonight.” You waggle your eyebrows teasingly. “Jason is coming.”

Eyes widening as her heart starts to race, there isn’t the possibility of playing it cool. Her crush on the actor is nearly overwhelming and to her horror, she can barely form sentences around him. So often she is asked why she’s so quiet. “Oh god.” She moans. “I’m gonna embarrass myself.”

“You’re not!” Plopping yourself down on the stool beside her behind the desk for a moment of work wife support, you squeeze your best friend close to your side and shake her a little as if you’re trying to shake her nerves out. “He’s a sweetheart and an absolute goofball. And I totally caught him checking you out at lunch today.”

“Oh b.s.” she huffs, waving her hand at you even if she perks up slightly and rolls her shoulders back. “He was not.”

“He was.” You nudge her, knowing you’ve already gotten her that much cheerier. “And I have it on good gossiping authority that he’s got a crush on somebody in the production.”

“The key word there is production.” She points out, sighing softly. You don’t tease her about her impossible crush, but she’s almost embarrassed by how much she likes him. She feels akin to a stalker, flustering every time she runs into him and yet she’s ’accidentally’ run into him more than once.

“You count as being in the production, babe.” The reminder is soft, but still nudging. “You don’t have to come tonight, but I wish you would. We’re just going to drive out to the beach and have burgers and hang out. Nothing fancy.”

“Just hanging out?” Since you’ve been married, the out of work time spent together has gone down, but that is to be expected and she doesn’t begrudge you that. Still, it’s nice to have the opportunity to spend time with you if nothing else. “Why not?” She shrugs and grins. “You know how much I love burgers.”

“I know you do.” And if you manage to get her in the backseat of your new car with her celebrity crush at any given point, the night will be twice as successful. “It’ll be fun, I promise. Grab your stuff and we’ll sign you out. They’ve called shooting for the day.”

“They have?” Her brows wing up and she’s jumping out of her chair to start gathering her things. Without guests, her days are boring at times and today was one of those days. She hadn’t even had confused guests arrive not knowing the house was closed for filming. “That’s early.”

“Yeah, but I can’t say I’m upset about it. Javi said they got the first two scenes this morning in one take each.”

“You weren’t on set?” She smirks and shoots you a coy look. “What were you doing? Recovering?”

“Hush!” Even as you bat her arm in playful shock, you’re near giggling. “No, I had some mail to send and my beloved junker was in the shop."

She groans in disbelief and shakes her head. “What’s wrong with Betsy now?” She demands. “She’s requiring more and more maintenance, you know.”

“I know.” At this, you at least have the decency to look a bit sheepish. Once Moira has her things, you head down to the time clock in the basement together so she can sign out. “And I guess Javi was more concerned about my safety with the old girl than I realized.”

“What do you mean?” She frowns in confusion. “Did he insult your car?”

“No, no! Nothing like that.” Javi could never insult anyone. You know that about him. He’s constitutionally incapable of intentional negativity. “He just mentioned that she breaks down a lot and that he’d feel better if I drove something a bit safer.” You bite your lip and shrug, wondering how she’ll take the news. “He worries.”

“Well, he should worry.” She admits, shrugging slightly. “You broke down on the 405 six months ago.” She reminds you. “Had to wait three hours for a tow truck.”

"I know." Though Javi doesn't know that. If he had, he probably would have done what he did today much sooner. "Which is why I'm hoping you'll be impressed by what he did instead of freaking out a little like I did."

“What did he do?” She is instantly suspicious and dragging you towards the stairs so she can find out.

"He, um..." You clear your throat and very quickly mumble: "Heboughtmeanewcar."

“He what?” She heard you, she just can’t believe what you’ve said. The very idea of someone just buying their spouse a new car isn’t something happens in real life in her experience. “What? What kind? Where? Is it here?”

"It's out front." The ever-so-slight embarrassment on your face is just because you can't believe he did something so extravagant out of a place of kindness and love. Out of worry, for that matter. Just because he cares about you and he can. "It's um...before you see it...just know it's not something I would have picked for myself but I do love it."

“Oh god.” She groans. “Don’t tell me that man got you a fucking minivan.”

"No, no. Quite the opposite." Back up the stairs and out to the front of the house, you put your hand into your pocket and click the remote entry that unlocks your shining, metallic blue Porsche. "Moira, meet MJ."

“Holyshitnofuckingwaaaaaaay!” The squeal makes it out in one breath as she nearly leaps for the car, yanking the door handle open to look inside and verify that your key fob unlocked this car. “Can he buy me one too?” She begs, teasing but obviously slightly jealous as she coos over the car.

"Honestly if you asked, he probably would," you tell her, glad to see that she's excited about this development instead of getting worried that it's overbearing or that Javi is lovebombing you. Neither of which is the case.

“Holy shit.” She huffs. “It smells amazing.”

"New car smell, right? I swear Porsches have their own specific version."

“Because it’s expensive.” She pokes her head out of the car and looks at you over the hood. “Don’t tell me that he just surprised you with it?”

"I don't know if you've noticed, but surprises are kind of his thing." From the front steps of the house, the guys and Tamara appear and you can't help the way you light up at even the smallest sight of your soulmate. “Everybody excited to get outta here?"

“I wonder what he will surprise you with next time?” She chuckles, happy to see that you are so happy. You deserve everything.

“Hopefully nothing as big,” you half-laugh under your breath as the group comes down the front steps toward you.

“Hell yes.” Tamara answers happily. “A burger and a beer or two sounds like the perfect way to unwind tonight.”

When the rest of the group makes it over to the car there are hugs and squeezes all around and Tamara coos over the new convertible lovingly. "Since everybody else was driven," she eyes the boys with amusement. "Why don't we take Mrs. G's gorgeous new baby and my SUV out to Casa Gutierrez and we can go from there?"

“I want to ride in the convertible!” Alex immediately calls it and Jason shoots a glance over at Moira to see if she’s going to call the other tiny backseat.

"Surprising no one." Tamara laughs. "Jay and Moira, wanna ride with me? I think if we try to split up the adoring soulmates, the world might implode."

Everyone laughs and Javi shrugs. “It just might.” He admits. “It is hard enough to be away from her when she is having her nails done with Moria.” However, he knows you need your time with your friends and he would never deny you anything you need.

“Which is a tradition we cherish, and you’re the king of appreciating a nice new manicure anyway, mi amor.” Before him, your weekly manicure sessions with your best friend had been an excuse to spend time together, listening to music and gossiping and painting each other’s nails. Once Javi had heard about this, he had insisted on upgrading it to a weekly lunch and salon date for the two of you.He smirks and winks at you as he thinks about the way your hand looks when you wrap it around his cock. It’s your favorite way to beg him for sex, not that you have to beg, but you love to feel him harden in your hand. “Yes I do.”

“Okay.” Having a feeling that you’re both thinking about the same thing, you snap back into reality just long enough to nudge a slightly panicky looking Moira toward Tamara and Jason. “We’ll meet you guys at the house. See you in a bit!”

Everyone is quickly loaded up into the cars, Alex groaning over the buttery leather interior and grinning like a Cheshire Cat as he leans forward. “Make her fly?” He begs.

He’s like a little kid in the backseat all the way down the Pacific Coast Highway. For the length of the drive it is nothing but good music and chatter in both cars and even when you leave Tamara’s SUV in the driveway of the cottage to take both convertibles out for dinner, the good mood just keeps rolling. By the time the six of you get the little burger shack with its old fashioned jukebox and brightly painted and varnished tables, you’re both starving and in an incredibly good mood.

“Oh my goodness, I love the vibes of this place.” Moira is absolutely enchanted by the relaxed atmosphere and the relaxing classic rock that is pouring out of the speakers of the jukebox. It’s very chill, very surfer-like. Even if the rocky cliffs aren’t the perfect setting for surfboards and catching waves.

“Isn’t it the cutest? And I’ve looked over the menu a million times, everything looks so good.” Your best friend had glued herself to your side the second both cars got here and you’re dying to know why she’s blushing so badly but you won’t pry quite yet. “I’ve been wanting to come here for ages.”

“Why didn’t you say something before now?” Javi asks, almost looking hurt that you kept what you wanted to yourself. “We could have come.”

“I knew we’d get around to it.” You reassure him, and make a mental note that Javi seems a little extra sensitive to making you as happy as humanly possible today, despite — or perhaps because of — the car purchase just hours ago. “And I was right, wasn’t I? We’re here now.”

“Yes we are.” He relaxes at your words and the way you stroke your hand down the small of his back as you lean into him. “We need to try everything you want.”

“That’s either going to be a very big tab or a whole lot of visits, but I like the enthusiasm, mi amor.” The two of you slide up to the rest of the group to find Alex already flirting his way into getting two tables pushed together instead of having to wait. Moira has joined Tamara at the jukebox where they are eagerly picking out songs, and Jason is lingering slightly behind with his eyes trained firmly on the ground in front of him like he’s misbehaved or something.

“What’s wrong with him?” Javi asks you, noticing Jason’s behavior and finding it odd for the actor. He’s not as outgoing as Alex, but he’s normally not sulking like a kid put in time out.

“Not sure yet.” The two of you hang to the back of the group as the beaming hostess leads Alex to his table and all the rest of you only by accident. “But I caught him get starry eyed looking at Moira earlier. Maybe there’s a thread there?”

“You picked up on that?” He lifts a brow and grins as he glances back at your best friend. “I thought I was imagining things.”

“Nope.” Shaking your head lets you smother a giggle as you walk together, and you grin up at your husband. “Clear as day!”

“What does she think about him?” You have to know, as close as the two of you are. But Javi doesn’t push you to tell him everything you and Moira discuss. He respects your friendship enough to know that you might keep secrets from him that she divulges.

“Oh, we are absolutely meddling,” you murmur, right before letting go of his arm to sit down.

“It’s like that, huh?” He snorts in amusement and sits down beside you.

“Like what?” Jason asks brightly. He’s already picked up a menu and is leaning back in his chair, savoring the evening breeze off the Pacific.

“Like a party.” Javi answers, glancing over at Jason. “How was the drive here?”

“Stunning.” Alex grins, leaning forward just as Jason leans back. “I’m gonna have to get one of those for myself, ya know.”

“So you are going to let Jason drive it back?” Javi asks with a grin of his own.

Picking up on Javi's thread quickly, you bury your grin behind your menu and shrug. "Someone would have to keep an eye on him if I did let that happen."

Javi chuckles. “And who better than your best friend?”

"Perfect." Moira might kill you for it later -- if the foot stepping on yours under the table is any indication -- but you'll be damned if you're not going to at least try to help.

“But I wanted to drive her some more.” Alex pouts playfully, even as he hands over the keys to the Porsche.

"Play nice and you'll get another chance," Tamara advises, still grinning when the waiter comes over to take everyone's drink orders.

“Or better yet, buy one.” Jason snorts. “Or maybe not, the way you drive.”

"Hey!" Alex all but pouts. "I'm a good driver!"

Moira snorts and Jason immediately bites his lip, the edges of his ears turning red as he looks at the menu like he’s trying to memorize it.

The ordering of drinks distracts from whatever must surely have happened during the drive out to the coast, and the table is awash with margaritas and beers in no time. Conversation turns to the menu and everyone's plans for the weekend, but your best friend beside you is suspiciously silent.

“Everything okay?” Your innocent question makes her jump, lost in thought until you rip her back to the present. “Oh, uh, y-yeah.” She stammers. “Everything’s great. Fine. Everything’s fine.”

"Liar." Eyeing her, margarita in hand, you lean slightly to your side and have a sip of your drink. "You're a terrible liar."

“What?” She gives you an exaggerated innocent look.

“What happened?” You whisper, waggling your eyebrows at her like you’re sure she has a secret.

“Alex drives like a maniac.” She whispers back after a long moment of silence. Her face is turning scarlet again and she bites her lip. “We weren’t wearing seatbelts and….” She chokes out a groan. “I know that my boob fits perfectly in his hand now, so that’s gonna be the highlight of my fantasies for the next hundred years.”

“What??” Barely able to stifle a snort of laugh by clamping your hand down over your mouth, your eyes bulge looking at her. Thank god you’re capable of keeping your voice down to a hiss. “You’re kidding me!”

“Noooooo.” She groans and flops her face into her hand. “And Jason reacted like I had an infectious disease.”

“I’m sure it wasn’t that bad,” you promise her, glad that the other four at the table are currently distracted by some other discussion at the moment. “He was probably just embarrassed.”

“Or he’s disgusted he accidentally touched me.” She snorts, hating how rejected she felt when he had pulled backed and refused to look at her even as he apologized.

“I’d call that the least likely option.” After all, you know his eyes were trained on her ass at Craft Services this afternoon. There was no mistaking that. And more than once he’s gotten blushy and excitable talking to her between scenes or at a meal. Moira just never noticed because she was blushy and excitable too. And because she was fairly blind to anyone ever paying her compliments.

“Whatever you say.” She huffs quietly. “You’ve found your perfect prince and he’s literally amazing.”

"And you will, too." Because if it happened for you, there is nothing in the world that is going to stop you until you help your best friend find that happiness, too.

“We will see.” She doesn’t want to bring down the mood at all, so she shoots you a smile. “So you named the car already?”

"First song on the test drive was Mary Jane's Last Dance," you tell her, letting the deliberate subject change wash past you. There's no use harping on it when Jason is sitting a few feet away and Moira will just dig her heels in. "So it was kind of a no brainer."

“Sounds like it.” She laughs and shrugs. “MJ is kind of cute. Some people will think of Spider-Man, some people will think of smoking out.” She laughs. “Some people with think of Michael Jackson.”

“Variety is the spice of life, right?” Your little shrug is playful. Unserious. A small attempt to keep the mood playful for her.

“You should get a vanity plate for her.” She hums, knowing how much you enjoy figuring out what people are trying to say through their plates.

"Can you get them with just two letters on it?" It's a question you've never, ever had to contemplate before and now you can't recall if you've ever seen a short vanity plate before.

“What about MJ and the year?” She suggests.

"That could work." You hold up your glass to her to toast. "Just as long as you go for endless drives with me and keep being my adventure buddy. I can't possibly be Thelma without my Louise."

“Always.” She snorts and picks up her own glass to tap against yours. “I’ll be the scrub in the passenger side of my best friend’s ride.”

You snort, but toast her anyway. "You're dating us with that lyric, babe."

That makes her laugh, even though it’s jarring how much time as passed by since she first discovered her first soulmate mark and hoped to find them soon. “I’ll own it.”

"It's a good ass song." There's no debating that. Just like there's no debating how relaxed you are with your soulmate on one side of you and your best friend on the other. With a whole table full of friends. It's become your new reality almost as quickly as meeting and marrying your soulmate, and there's something about that that clenches your heart tonight. "And I swear I'm not getting teary over a TLC song."

“Yes you are.” Moira snorts. “But that’s okay. Right now, everything in your life is perfect.” She might be a little envious, but she would never begrudge you this happiness. You deserve it and more.

------ Master Tags: @pixiedurango @chattychell @winter-fox-queen @lady-himbo @artsymaddie @princess76179 @paintballkid711 @missminkylove @pedrosbrat @ew-erin @sarahjkl82-blog @sharkbait77 @justanotherblonde23 @lv7867 @recklesswit @mylittlesenaar @f0rever15elf @gallowsjoker @steeevienicks @athalien @sherala007 @skvatnavle @thatpinkshirt @jaime1110 @girlimjusttryingtoreadfanfics @goodgriefitsawildworld @greeneyedblondie44 @littlemousedroid @harriedandharassed @churchill356 @ajathegreats-blog @haylzcyon   @beardsanddetectives @kirsteng42 @ladykatakuri @adancedivasmom @madiebear @tanzthompson @emilianamason @bigsdinger @xocalliexo @pedr0swh0r3 @avaleineandafryingpan @charlyrmv @avidreader73 @iceclaw101 @loveslide @elegantduckturtle @becsworld @julesonrecord @its-nebuleuse @itsrubberbisquit @mikeyswifie @guelyury @lizzie-cakes @for-a-longlongtime @vabeachazn @purplerain04 @weho2kcmo @madnessofadaydreamer

TUWOP: @inept-the-magnificent @missladym1981 @sunnytuliptime @iamladyp @spishsstuff @famouslyanonymous

[ineffectualbookseller]

The way Azirphale is underestimated and practically infantalized by heaven is so closely tied to his femininity and I think we should talk about it more because I just want to shout about how relatable the way he's treated in his workplace is as a woman working in a traditionally male field

It's in all the little niggling comments from your boss about personal things that hold no bearing on your work

and the assumption that what you're doing must be simple if it was assigned to you

your work is trivialized

and you get these the placating smiles when you're told plans and proposals are rejected and passed over

or when your complaints are dismissed

and you get more of the same from upper management

it all feels so frustrating and draining but you're at work so all you can do is take a breathe put on that mask and move on with your day

It is all so deteimental to your emotional well being and textually, so much of this is tied to Aziraphale's softness, his gayness - his femininity

The thing about working in an environment and gives you this feeling - of being simultaneously destrought watching your belief in yourself get chipped away but also just so irate becuase you know you don't deserve it - is how it builds. It sinks under your skin and feeds into this indignant dejection until you can have a moment of release - but Azirphale doesn't get to bitch about it over drinks with friends, he doesn't get a lunch break where he can go for a walk and listen to an angry scandi death metal playlist, he doesn't even get the chance to cry about it in the bathroom for 5 minutes before confronting it again

(And I talked a little bit about it in the tags of this beautiful photoset but this all comes into play whenever Crowley dismisses his plans or calls him an idiot. These are purely emotional reactions; I really don't think Crowley means much by it - he respects Aziraphale's opinion and genuinely thinks he's brilliant - but Crowley is so quick to use this terminology when Aziraphale is making a decision Crowley thinks is wrong and he doesn't know how much this hurts Aziraphale. Just like Aziraphale doesn't understand the true impact the Fall had on Crowley, Crowley doesn't understand the ways heaven has been tearing away at Aziraphale's self worth)

Aziraphale has been facing this constant drip of denigration since before the beginning of time and has never released the pressure valve. At this point, he's a bomb waiting to go off

[br1ghteyed]

— notes from stephen king's "on writing".

I read Stephen King's "On Writing" (well, listened to it) so you don't have to. Whether you need creative inspiration, want some quick writing advice from the book, or didn't read it for an assignment, here you go.

───────────────────────────────

These notes are only from the "On Writing" portion of the book which comes after the memoir-heavy portion and a section called "Toolbox" which emphasizes the importance of grammar and knowing your craft. The end also has a section called "On Life" which discusses how he was hospitalized after an accident and writing helped him find him way back to himself. Two essays from his sons (one's an interview transcript) about writing and their life with their father are also featured at the end.

[ 𝗢𝗡 𝗪𝗥𝗜𝗧𝗜𝗡𝗚 ]

- If you don’t want to work your ass off don’t bother - If you want to be a writer you have to read a lot and write a lot - Reading - "you cannot wish to sweep someone else away by the force if your writing unless it has been done to you" - If you don’t have time to read you don’t have the time or tools to write - Constant reading brings you to a mindset to write more freely, and to know what’s been done before - King talks about 4-6 hours of reading and writing per day - Writing is best when it’s "an inspired plague", writing feeling like work is the kiss of death - King does about 10 pages/2000 words a day - Attributes his success in part to staying active/a healthy body and a healthy relationship - Recommends 1000 words per day as a starting point for writing daily, allowing even one day per week off - Most important part of a writing space is a door to close that says you mean business - You want to get rid of the world around you because you’re creating your own world - Ensure “the muse” knows where you’ll be everyday and when do it will start showing up - He says to not just feel limited to write what you “know”, but what you know includes imagination and feeling too

[ PLOT ]

- King doesn’t plot he believes in giving the story a place to grow - Not just the novels creator but but it’s first reader - The idea of plot wheels when you're stuck, apparently used a lot in the 1920s - Strong situations for writing can be asked as a what if question ( ex what if vampires invaded New York City? ) - An exercise: write 5-6 unplotted pages from a situation - "Description begins in the writers imagination but should be in the readers" - It’s as easy to over describe as it is to under describe - Fresh images, simple vocabulary

[ DIALOUGE ]

- Never tell if you can show us - Dialogue is usually done best by people who like to speak and listen to people (( Don’t love how he just read two slurs out loud in the audiobook version !!?? )) - Talk should be true on the page, no matter ugly or profane, it shows character - If I have to tell you I lose as the writer if you can figure it out yourself I win - If you do your job your characters will come to life and start to do things on their own - Try everything if it works it works if it doesn’t delete it - Hemingway’s “kill your darlings”

[ SYMBOLISM ]

- Symbolism and theme in second draft as things arise … I agree with this I tend to look back and double down on the motifs and patterns that naturally arise in the first draft instead of trying to insert or plan it - Symbolism and the other adornments are bells and whistles, the story is still the most important part

[ THEME ]

- On theme - every book is about something, look at the forest of the book after staring at all the branches closely - Boredom is good for creative jams - Thinking above the curve - Asking yourself what are you writing about/why are you spending the time on this specific story (what’s worth it) - Most writers seem to have the same themes or obsessions in their works.. the same things will likely re-arise throughout your works - Don’t START with theme.. the story idea tends to come first. Once the story is on paper, then ask what it means and work with it

[ REVISION & IDEAL READER ]

- King does 2 drafts and a polish .. rewriting varies by writing - Write the first draft without input from others.. like laying fresh snow without tracks from others yet - When you let someone into the draft don’t let them talk to you about it until you talk to them about it - Take some time off to let your book rest, he suggests about 6 weeks - Waiting makes it feel like someone else’s… it’s easier to kill someone’s else’s darlings rather than your own - Character motivation is something you’ll see better (why did a character do X or Y if it seems they never would, etc) - He focuses on “big questions” (resonance— what’s it all about and how do I make it clearer without spoon feeding it) mostly in the first read through alongside things like glaring spelling errors, needing clarifying sentences in places - Every novel has an ideal reader in the back of their mind - You can’t let the whole world into your story but you can let in the ones that matter most - Envisioning your ideal reader helps you get outside yourself - Nothing wrong with fast paced novels but you do risk losing the reader or wearing them out, despite modern day publishers sometimes encouraging quick pace - Every story should unfold at its own pace--too slow is a risk too - Look back to "ideal reader" and how they would feel reading the book/the pace (ask: is it over/underexplained to them, etc) - Pacing = “just take out the boring parts” -- kill your darlings, even when it breaks your ego - KILL YOUR DARLINGS !!! - Second draft: first draft-10% !! - In general, reader more interested in what’s going to happen than what already happened (re: clunky backstory) - A) everyone has a history, b) most of it isn’t very interesting.. stick to the parts that are - Research should be as far in the background as you can get it -- remember you're writing a novel, not a research paper

[ WRITING CLASSES ]

- I have a lot of my own ideas about these since my degree is in writing, but I agree with some of the points King made that they're beneficial in ways but also put your writing on the spot a bit too much, expose your writing to empty critiques, and can end up giving you some writers block by making you feel you need to write something "important" or within a certain topic, etc.... - You learn the most by writing and reading more... you don't really NEED any writing classes. (My personal favorite part was engaging with other writers) - Intellectually stimulating and fun but often lack the "nuts and bolts" of writing

[ PUBLISHING ]

- Publishers are mostly looking for hot new writers who can write and sell a lot of books - Not all agents are good agents - "The most important thing you can do is read the market" - Get smaller magazines and stories published (being able to supply a list, even short, of reputable publications) - "You cant make them like their story, but you can make it easier for them to try to like it" -- go in looking like a professional, word counts and correct paper and staples and cover letters, etc (small cover letter example in the book) - Being a new writer you need to remember that anyone can publish an ad as a literary agent or claiming to be one

King says a lot of his writing knowledge feels more like instinct .. and he has written because it fulfills him for the buzz and the joy ("if you can do it for the joy, you can do it forever"). "Writing isn't life, but it can be a way back to life".

───────────────────────────────

The notes are largely unedited because they were originally just for me, but I hope someone gleans something from them!

[fuzzyautumninmetal]

Little Thief

After like 5 months I've finally found time to write.

I'm aware there is very little Spanish in this but my only way of translation is google and If I'm correct it isn't very reliable.

Anywayyy I hope y'all enjoy

(This is just smut with a small plot)

You were the tech analyst for the Task Force 141, or as you call yourself 'The Tech Gal', you had been assigned to work for Los Vaqueros for a few months and it was a breath of fresh air. You struck up a friendship with Rudy and one night while you were drinking he dared you to do something people would claim extremely stupid. He dared you to steal the colonel's clothes.

"I don't know why everyone is so scared of Alejandro" you said while taking a sip of your drink, Rudy laughed "Have you not heard him when he's pissed off". You shrugged "I think it's sexy....Look that man could tell me to dress up as a clown in Spanish and I'd obey" you admitted and that made Rudy laugh "Okay I dare you to steal his clothes, let's see how 'sexy' he is then" he sipped his drink not thinking you would accept. "Price is my Captain. Ghost is my Lieutenant. Nothing scares me" you laughed back "I'll do it I'm not a pussy" you both shook on it and all you had to do was wait for the right time.

It's been a few days since Rudy's dare but you were waiting for the right time and when you saw Alejandro go to the showers you knew this was your chance.

You carefully and quietly sneaked into the guys shower room, you may have been the tech analyst but Ghost had shown you a few things, you saw that Alejandro was preoccupied. Perfect you smirked to yourself as you tiptoed towards his locker before taking his clothes.

You should of gone to straight to Rudy but you wanted to hear his reaction so you hid in one of the stalls with his clothes in hand.

"HIJO DE PUTA-" you heard him curse along with a loud bang from him slamming his locker door. You couldn't help but laugh, giving away your hiding spot.

The sound of heavy footsteps draws closer, and suddenly. Alejandro's massive frame is looming over you. His muscular arms crossed over his chest, his dark eyes narrowed into slices as he stares down at you "So, you think this is funny?"

You tried to look serious but couldn't "Yes. Yes I do" you looked up at his unamused face "And also stupid. Look Rudy dared me to do it because I said I wasn't scared of you"

Alejandro's eyebrows raises in disbelief, his expression shifting from anger to amused curiosity. "So, you've been dared by Rudy to steal my clothes? And you actually thought you could get away with it?"

"Yes" you looked towards the door and then back at Alejandro trying to think of an escape plan. Alejandro chuckled deeply, shaking his head in disbelief. He reaches out and grabs your chin, forcing you to look him in the eyes "You know, I could make this difficult for you. But instead, I'll give you a choice".

You looked at him innocently "I'm listening". His grip on your chin tightens ever so slightly, his gaze boring into yours "You can go to Rudy and tell him you couldn't go through with his little dare. Or... You can spend some time with me, and I promise to make it worth your while. "I-i" you were shocked at his response.

Seeing you surprised, Alejandro smirks, releasing his grip on your chin "What's the matter little thief? Didn't expect me to be so generous? Or perhaps you like the idea of spending time with me?"

Oh you would absolutely love to spend time with him but you was a kinky little whore who had a better idea. "Or you could let me go with your clothes, I tell Rudy it was a success and everyone thinks I'm mad for pissing you off" you smirked "Then, at any point, you take me by surprise and punish me for today."

His smirk fades, replaced by a look of amusement "You're full of surprises, aren't you?" he thought for a moment. "Very well. Take my things and go. But remember, I'll be watching you". You took his clothes and walked to the door before stopping "You can punish me in any way you want and I can't say no" and left to find Rudy.

As you made your escape, Alejandro can't help but shake his head with a mix of admiration and amusement. His mind is already planning out the ways he'll make you pay for your audacity... and the countless ways he'll enjoy it.

You found Rudy in the cafeteria and held Alejandro's clothes up for him to see. "You actually did it?" Rudy asked and you nodded while sitting down "Told you I wasn't a pussy".

"You better beware, little thief. I've got quite the taste for adventure now..." Alejandro mutters to himself as he walks away from the locker room, already plotting his revenge and anticipating the thrill of the chase.

It had been 3 days since you stole Alejandro's stuff and yet he hasn't done anything. That's the part that excites you the most.

The sound of footsteps echoed through the halls, drawing closer to your location. Alejandro's eyes darkened with anticipation as he rounded the corner, spotting you engrossed in your workout. With a sinister smirk playing at his lips, he approached slowly.

He stopped just inches from where you were sitting, his towering figure casting an ominous shadow over you. He leaned down slightly, his voice low and threatening. "Well, well... looks like our little thief is all alone." "For now" you smirked.

Alejandro's eyes narrowed at your defiant tone, but a slow smile crept across his face. He leaned in even closer, his breath warm against your ear. "You're playing with fire, little thief. And I plan on making sure you get burned." 

"You'll have to catch me first. and I'm fast" you made a run for it. It caught Alejandro by surprise.

With a growl of frustration, Alejandro sprinted after you, his muscular frame moving with surprising agility. He caught up to you in no time, grabbing your wrist roughly and spinning you around to face him. "You think you can escape me?" 

"Yes" you stepped onto his foot and ran off again. Everyone was either cheering for you or praying for you're safety. You turned to see a very pissed off Colonel behind you.

As you ran, Alejandro let out a grunt of pain from your sudden move but quickly regained his balance. His anger only fuelled his pursuit as he chased after you once again. This time, he was even more determined to catch you. 

You were running around the base endlessly trying to find a place to hide. You looked to see that you was free from Alejandro for a moment so you went into the first room you came across and hid. 

As Alejandro caught his breath, he realised that you had vanished from sight.  His mind raced as he tried to think as to where you could of gone. The door near him was slightly open, a mischievous grin spread across his face - you had led him straight to his own bedroom.

You quickly hid under the bed in the room and steadied your breathing to the point it sounded like you wasn't breathing. 

Slowly, Alejandro approached the door to his bedroom, his heart pounding with anticipation. He paused for a moment, wondering if this was really happening. With a sigh, he pushed open the door and stepped inside, his eyes scanning the room for any sign on you. 

You saw his feet and froze, the longer you stayed away from him the worse your punishment would be. That's exactly what you wanted. 

Alejandro noticed your footprints on the floor, leading straight to his bed. A mischievous smile crossed his face. He knelt down, grabbing the edge of the bed and lifted it up slowly. 

You saw the bed lift up slowly and looked up to see him smirking, you grinned sheepishly before trying to get away but he was ready for you this time. 

As you tried to crawl away Alejandro grabbed your ankle, pulling you back to him. He stood up, towering over you once again, his eyes filled with a mixture of anger and amusement. "You really thought you could outsmart me?"

"I mean I kinda did" you stood up, brushing the dust off your clothes. Alejandro put his hand on your waist and chuckled darkly, his grip tightening slightly. "Oh, you may have gotten away for a little while, but now it's time for your punishment"

You leaned back a little, bringing the back of your hand to your forehead "Oh what am I ever going to do" Alejandro's eyes flashed with lust as he pulled you closer to him, his other hand reaching down to grab your waist. "You're going to learn your lesson, little thief. And trust me, you'll enjoy every second of it"

You brought your face up to his ear and whispered "Oh I don't doubt it". His lips curled into a smirk as he continued to hold you captive with his gaze. Slowly, he lowered himself onto the bed, pulling you on top of him. "You're such a naughty girl hiding from me"

You put your hands of his chest "Oh what are you going to do to me Colonel?" With a mischievous glint in his eyes, Alejandro began to explore your body with his hands, tracing patterns on your skin that made you shiver with anticipation. "Oh, I think I'll do more than just punish you, little thief"

You brought your hands to his waist and push yourself up from his chest "a deal is a deal. You caught me so you can punish me however you want". Alejandro grinned triumphantly as he listened to your words, delighted by your boldness. He leaned in close, his lips brushing against your lips as he whispered "Don't worry, I fully intend to take full advantage of that"

You bit your lip not realising what you have gotten yourself into and that made Alejandro chuckle softly, his warm breath tickling your lips as his continued to tease you with subtle touches. "You're such a tempting little thing" he murmured. "I think I'm going to have a lot of fun breaking you in"

You decided to be a brat one more time, when he walked into the room you noticed he left to door ajar slightly, now he was distracted you made a run for it once again. 

You could hear Alejandro's frustrated growl as you made your escape. "Damn it, little thief! Come back here!" He quickly gave chase, his footsteps thundering the corridor as he persuaded you relentlessly.

"No" you laughed. You passed Rudy as he shouted "I'll see you at your funeral". Alejandro's eyes flashed with anger as he chased you through the halls. He caught up to you just as you turned a corner, grabbing onto your arm roughly to stop your escape. "You think this is funny?"

"Oh I think it's fucking hilarious making you work for it" you twisted his arm slightly so he would let you go and ran for it. 

"Fucking tease" he muttered under his breath as he followed after you once again. He was beginning to lose patience, and the look in his eyes showed that he wouldn't be stopping until he had caught up with you. "I swear, If I catch you..."

You looked at your watch "What's that? Sorry It's home time" you smirked before running to your car. Since there wasn't any room for you on base, Laswell manage to find a temporary home for you while you were in Las Almas. 

Alejandro's eyes narrowed as he watched you run to your car, his mind already planning his next move. With a determined stride, he headed towards his own vehicle - a sleek black sports car that matched his dominant personality.

You laughed as you drove home, this was the most fun you've had in years. You were safe for one more day you thought to yourself completely oblivious of Alejandro's plan. 

As he drove, he couldn't help but feel a mixture of frustration and arousal. He hated being toyed with, but there was something about the chase that turned him on. His mind was racing with thoughts of what he would do to you once he finally caught you. 

Once you got home you had a shower and change into some comfy clothes before getting on with some chores around the house. 

Alejandro was waiting for you outside your house, leaning casually against his car with his arms crossed over his broad chest. He watched you walk around your house, a smirk playing against the corners of his lips. 

As you changed into something more comfortable, Alejandro's mind wandered to the tantalizing image of you naked. His body was tense with anticipation as he imagined how you would look underneath him. He couldn't wait any longer and decided to make his move.  

You were in your bedroom putting some clothes away but the squeak of a door caught your attention, you looked outside your bedroom window and saw his car. Alejandro had followed you home.

Alejandro's heart raced with excitement. He quickly moved towards your room, his footsteps silent on the hardwood floors. As he reached your bedroom door, he took a deep breath to steady his nerves before pushing it open slowly. He expected you to be in your bedroom but you wasn't, you hid from him again.

Alejandro's eyes scanned the room, searching for any sign of you. His mind was filled with possibilities of where you could be hiding. He knew he wouldn't rest until he found you.

You giggled from your closet, you knew this was one of the most obvious places to hide but you decided it was time to endure your punishment once he found you.

The sound of your giggles echoed through your bedroom, guiding Alejandro straight to the closet. His eyes narrowed as he slowly opened the door, revealing your smiling face peering back at him. He stepped forward, his body closing in on yours as he finally had you cornered.

You held your hands up "You caught me, I won't run this time I promise"

"Good," Alejandro growled, his voice low and threatening. He grabbed your wrists, pulling you out of the closet and pinning you against the wall. His body was pressed against yours, his hard cock straining against his pants as he dominated you completely.

Alejandro's grip on your wrists tightened, causing you to gasp in surprise. His eyes bored into yours, a mix of lust and dominance in their depths. "I'm going to punish you for running from me"

"Good" was all you said. A dark chuckle escaped Alejandro's lips as he leaned in, his breath hot against your ear. "You're going to beg for it," he whispered, before capturing your lips in a rough, possessive kiss.

You pulled away "Oh but Colonel. I don't beg" you were playing with fire here but it was exciting not knowing what was going to happen next.

Alejandro's eyes flashed with amusement at your boldness. "We'll see about that," he growled, his hand moving to grip the hem of your shirt roughly. He tore it apart easily, revealing your smooth skin beneath.

You didn't move, you didn't cover yourself. Instead you decide to play with your nipples to see how he'd react.

Alejandro's eyes darkened further as he watched you play with your nipples. His mouth watered at the sight of them hardening under his gaze. "You're a tease," he murmured, leaning in to capture one of your hardened peaks between his lips.

You bit your lip as as he suck one nipple and you played with the other. Alejandro moaned against your skin, the taste of you sending a jolt of pleasure through his body. His hand moved to your other nipple, giving it equal attention as he continued to dominate you. "I'll make you beg,"

You cupped his face and brought it to yours "I'd like to see you try" you kissed his neck before biting into it. 

Alejandro's eyes closed tightly in a mix of pleasure and pain as you bit him. His hips began to grind against you, their movement mirroring the desire he felt for you. "Fuck," he groaned, his hand moving to squeeze your ass roughly.

With one strong arm, Alejandro picked you up and tossed you onto the bed. He followed you down, his large muscular body looming over yours. His hands moved to tug at your shorts and panties, desperate to get them off you.

"Someone's desperate" you smirked.

"You have no idea," Alejandro growled, his voice low and rough. He finally managed to pull your panties off, revealing your wet folds to him. His tongue darted out to taste you, lapping at your entrance like a hungry animal.

Alejandro's sudden intrusion caused you to cry out in surprise "Oh fuck". He thrust his tongue deeper, using it to stroke and tease your sensitive nerves. You couldn't help but squirm underneath him, your body aching for more.

You gripped on his raven hair and teased "This isn't much of a punishment"

Alejandro's eyes met yours, full of lust and amusement. "Oh, it's just beginning," he promised before pulling away from you. He positioned himself at your entrance, his hard cock pressing against you through his pants.

You sat up and started palming his cock through his pants but he pulled your hands away.

"No," he growled, capturing your wrists in his strong grip. "Not yet." He pushed you back onto the bed, his body following after. With one swift movement, he pulled off his pants, revealing his large, throbbing cock to you.

You looked at his cock with wide eyes, you had a feeling his was big but you never thought he'd be that big. Alejandro's eyes glinted with satisfaction at your surprise. "Do you like what you see?" he asked, stroking his cock lazily. You could only nod in reply, unable to tear your eyes away from the sight of him.

He smirked before bringing his fingers towards your wet folds, "you won't cum unless I say you can. Do you understand?" he asked and you nodded.

Alejandro's fingers plunged deep into your folds, searching for your sensitive spots. He rubbed circles around your clit, increasing the intensity of the pleasure he was giving you. "Such a good girl," he murmured, his voice thick with approval.

You moaned while bringing your hands down and started playing with you nipples again. At the sound of your moan, Alejandro's fingers worked faster, stroking and pinching your clit with precision. He watched as you arched your back, pushing your breasts further into his view. "So fucking beautiful,"

You wanted to come so badly but you couldn't. Not without Alejandro's permission but you weren't going to beg for it.

Alejandro could sense your desire to climax, but you needed to beg him if you wanted to cum. He continued his assault on your sensitive areas, increasing the speed of his fingers. "You're so close, aren't you?" he asked, his voice dripping with anticipation.

"Y-yes" you chocked out. "Tell me," he commanded, his other hand reaching up to pinch one of your nipples hard. "Beg me." "Never" you said through your teeth. You've never begged a man for something in your life

"Oh little thief, you will," Alejandro promised, leaning down to take one of your nipples into his mouth, sucking hard. He increased the pressure on your clit, causing a wave of pleasure that threatened to overwhelm you. "Beg me."

"N-no. I won't beg"

Alejandro smirked at your resistance. "I love a challenge," he murmured, circling your clit with his thumb while pinching your other nipple between his teeth. He sped up, practically abusing your pussy with his fingers, you started to cry "God yes".

Alejandro's eyes glinted with malicious delight at your cries. "That's it," he murmured hoarsely, his fingers working magic within you. With another forceful thrust, he pushed two fingers deep into your wet core, hitting your G-spot perfectly. 

You looked at him, pleading him to let you cum but his dark chuckle made you realise he doesn't care "Unless you beg you can cum mi amore." 

Alejandro's fingers curled inside you, his grip tightening as he stroked and pressed against your most sensitive spot. You could feel your orgasm building, the intensity of it unlike anything you'd ever experienced before. "Beg me," he commanded once more.

You caved in, for the first time in your life you begged "F-fine. Please let me cum please"

The moment you begged, Alejandro increased the pressure on your clit and G-spot, pushing you over the edge. Your orgasm crashed down on you like a wave, leaving you gasping and shuddering in its wake. "Mi amore,"

It was so intense, you had never experienced anything like this before

As you rode out your orgasm on his hand, Alejandro slowed his movements, his fingers gently tracing inside you as your body trembled and spasmed. With a soft grunt, he withdrew his fingers, bringing them to his mouth and licking them clean with a satisfied smirk. 

You're breathing was heavy but you knew this was just the beginning. "I always get what I want, mi amore" Alejandro whispered, his voice low and husky. He leaned down to capture your lips in a deep, passionate kiss, his tongue delving into your mouth as he claimed you completely.

You cupped his face and rolled over so you was on top of him. Alejandro flipped you over onto your back, pinning your wrists above your head as he gazed down at you with hungry eyes. He allowed himself a moment to appreciate the sight of your body beneath him, before leaning down to suck and bite on the sensitive skin just below your ear.

You locked your legs around his waist and tried to pull him down but he wasn't budging. You didn't deserved to get fucked yet

"So desperate little thief," Alejandro smirked, his voice rough with desire. He kissed his way down your jawline, trailing gentle bites along the way, until he reached your neck. "You need to beg for it." Alejandro got a kick out of your hatred for begging.

He carried on kissing down your body until his face was between your legs. With a smirk, Alejandro trailed his tongue along the soft flesh of your inner thighs, causing you to shiver in anticipation. He parted your legs wider, revealing your wetness to him as he leaned forward to take one swollen bud between his lips.

You arched your back in pleasure "Oh Alejandro". The sound of his name coming out of your mouth made him feral. You sounded so sweet, so innocent. He started sucking and slurping. He ate you out like a starved man.

Feeling your body tense and tremble beneath him, Alejandro knew you were close. He increased the pressure on your clit, pushing you over the edge as he felt you climax on his mouth. You moaned so loudly you wouldn't be surprised if you got a complaint from your neighbours but you didn't care.

Chuckling softly, Alejandro relished in your cries of pleasure as he savoured the taste of you on his tongue. He continued to stroke your inner walls with his fingers, milking every drop of pleasure from your body as he pressed a kiss to your swollen, sensitive clit.

He came up and kissed you. He wanted you to taste yourself on his lips. Alejandro smirked against your lips, his eyes twinkling with mischief. "Mmm, you taste delicious," he murmured before leaning in to capture your lips in another deep, passionate kiss.

The kiss didn't last long as he soon had his hand around your throat. With a growl of desire, Alejandro pushed you back onto the bed, his hand still wrapped around your throat as he hovered over you. "Now beg," he commanded, his voice low and threatening.

"Ple- Please fuck me" you begged and it was like music to his ears. "That's it," Alejandro rasped, his eyes dark with lust. He lowered his body onto yours, guiding his thick cock towards your wet entrance. With a forceful thrust, he impaled himself inside you, filling you up completely.

"You're too big" you cried. "That's a shame" Alejandro growled, pulling out slightly before slamming back in again "If you hadn't ran away from me earlier" he pulled out and slammed back into you. "Maybe I would of eased you onto my cock" he pulled out completely before slamming back into you harder.

His pace quickening, he took you roughly, your protests turning into moans of pleasure as he hit deep inside you with each powerful stroke.

Alejandro's hand around your throat tightened in tandem with his thrusts, the rough treatment heightening both of your senses. His other hand found its way between your legs, fingers once again finding their rhythm as they teased and massaged your swollen clit.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck" you was becoming a blabbering mess. Alejandro's thrusts became more erratic, his body tensing as he neared his own climax. "That's it, beg for me," he demanded, his voice laced with lust and dominance.

"N-no" you smiled, you was still trying to test Alejandro's patience. "What was that?" Alejandro snapped, pulling out almost completely before plunging back in with renewed force. His hand around your throat tightened even more, cutting off your air supply momentarily as he took you roughly and without mercy.

Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as you screamed his name.

"That's it, call out my name," Alejandro growled, taking you deeper than ever before. Your scream echoed through the room, the sound of his name on your lips driving him wild with desire. "God please let me cum" you caved in again and begged.

"Not yet," Alejandro said, pulling out almost completely again before thrusting back in with a force that sent waves of pleasure through your body. His other hand left your throat to grab your hair, using it as leverage to pull your head back and expose your neck even more.

Alejandro's mouth descended on your neck, his lips and teeth leaving a trail of bruises and kisses as he marked you as his own. His hips pumped hard and fast, driving deeper into you with each powerful stroke. "You're mine,"

"I'm yours, I promise" you clawed at his back, you needed to grab something. Anything. "Yes," Alejandro hissed, lifting your legs up and around his waist. He grabbed your hips and held you tight as he plunged into you with a force that made you cry out.

"Alejandro"

"That's right, say my name," Alejandro demanded, his thrusts becoming even more intense. He leaned down to capture your lips in a bruising kiss, his tongue forcing its way into your mouth as he continued to claim you completely.

"Please" you whispered

"Please what?" Alejandro asked, his eyes were wild and his breathing ragged as he looked down at you with an intensity that made your heart race. "Please let me cum" you cried.

Alejandro growled low in his throat, a sound of pure male satisfaction. His hands gripped your hips tighter as he began to thrust harder and faster. "Cum for me," he commanded, his cock hitting your sweet spot over and over again.

You was finally allowed to orgasm.

Alejandro's hips bucked wildly as he felt you cum around him. He groaned deeply, his own orgasm hitting him hard and fast. His cock throbbed inside of you as he released himself completely, filling you up with his hot seed. "Fuck,"

You both held onto each other as you both rode out your orgasms. Alejandro held onto you tightly, his body trembling with the force of his release. He pressed a kiss to your forehead before pulling out of you, his still hard cock slipping out with a wet slide.

You laid there, all sweaty and a blabbering mess. Alejandro chuckled softly, his eyes roaming over your flushed skin. "You're a mess," he said teasingly, reaching down to run his fingers through your hair. He leaned in close again, nuzzling his nose against yours. 

"Are you okay?" Alejandro asked and you nodded your head lazily. With a satisfied grin he pulled you up and into his arms, holding you close against his chest. "I should start stealing your stuff more often" you chuckled.

"You'd better not," Alejandro said, a hint of playfulness in his voice. "Or else I might have to punish you again." He nipped gently at your earlobe before kissing it softly. "I'm okay with that" you smiled.

"Very well," Alejandro said, grinning widely. He claimed your lips in a passionate kiss before breaking away to murmur against your lips, "But you might not be able to walk straight for days." You playfully smacked his arm "then you can explain to everyone back at base why I'm not in"

Alejandro chuckled, his eyes dark with desire. "Oh, I'll make sure to take full responsibility for your condition." "Deal" you kissed him.

Alejandro deepened the kiss, his tongue tangling with yours in a sensual dance. His grip on your lower back tightened, pulling you closer to him as his passion grew. He broke the kiss, looking into your eyes with hunger. "We should do this again sometime,"

"But not now" You laid down and pulled him with you, "Right now I just want to sleep" you giggled.

"Very well, sleep tight little thief" Alejandro said, his voice husky with desire. He lay down beside you, spooning you from behind. 

[absentwriterdoll]

896

C:"896, signal lost."

...

W:"896, still active."

C:"896, copy."

I can feel the hydraulics straining as I push against the controls.

As ever, if the reactor is still intact, it's not a confirmed kill.

The display shifts from dirt to the horizon.

Tracers streak across the sky.

H:[Warning. Internal bleeding detected.]

I can feel as much.

I scan my HUD.

Right side, lost. Left shoulder, depleted. Left arm at 35%. Left hip at 10%. Point defense at 20%, 45%, 30%, 10% respectively.

I sigh.

It hurts.

Even if I wanted to, there's not much more that I can do.

W:"896, munitions depleted, heavy damage sustained. Requesting permission to withdraw."

C:"896, granted."

W:"Harry, plot a course home."

H:[Acknowledged.]

I notice my point defense lighting up at far-off infantry.

I swap them to critical only. With this damage, I'll need the cover in case another mech realizes I'm still alive.

H:[Course plotted.]

W:"Send it."

I feel my legs shift under me - but I keep my eyes on the horizon, my weapons pointed toward the enemy battleline. A wounded mech is always a primary target.

Two missiles streak out from the infantry I saw earlier - nothing my point defense can't handle. Though, for good measure, I send a few rounds their way.

Everything hurts.

H:[Administering stimulant.]

A sharp sting in my neck - just a prelude to the pain lessening.

At least, in a minute or two, anyway.

Part of me wonders how much I could leave to the onboard AI. It already calculates most of the firing solutions.

My role is just selecting a target and pulling the trigger.

But it always has to be a human pulling a trigger.

Otherwise...

It becomes a question of when the AI starts deciding who is worth pulling the trigger on.

Can't let it start deciding who lives and who dies.

Best case scenario, it turns on its makers.

Worst case scenario, things devolve into a forever war.

…

Who’s to say that this isn’t a forever war already.

A mech raises itself on the horizon.

And I begin loosing rounds downrange.

My missing mass causes most of my fire to go wide initially.

A series of flashes.

And I react.

A round strikes me - but it’s off center.

Better than the alternative.

But my left hip doesn’t respond. I’m nearly defenseless.

W:“896, requesting support, relaying target.”

H:[Relaying target.]

It’s nearly all I can do to hope for the best.

M:“512, responding.”

H:[Radar lock detected.]

Tracers light up the mech from its side, causing it to buckle and flare - right as it looses a fusillade of missiles from one of its shoulder pods.

My point defense lights up, as does those of 512’s.

One zeroes out. I turn my hull to expose Three and Four.

Four zeroes out.

But Two and Three manage to clear the air with 512’s help.

10% and 5%.

W:“896, permission to request cover.”

C:“896, granted. Assigning 512.”

M:”512, moving to cover 896.”

W:“896, thank you.”

An unnecessary communication slips from me.

But it’s the truth.

I should be dead.

But I’m not.

C:“512, signal lost.”

In the corner of my eye, I see 512 light up - and vanish into fire.

And I see the one that did it. 

I loose rounds from my left arm - until it clacks empty.

And I hope to whatever gods may be listening that it doesn’t get back up.

Their reactor is still intact. It’s not a confirmed kill.

W:“896, relaying target, requesting kill confirm.”

A few moments pass - and then tracers streak in from afar.

Then a detonation.

L:“288, confirmed.”

W:“896, acknowledged.”

C:“288, cover 896’s retreat.”

L:“288, copy.”

In silence, I think my gratitude.

Part of me wonders if I should just withdraw on foot.

I glance at Harry’s AI core.

It would be a simple matter of-

L:“896, bogey.”

W:“896, munitions, defenses depleted, ejecting.”

H:[Radar lock detected.]

W:“Eject.”

H:[Ejecting. Give them hell.]

I pull Harry’s AI core.

And I’m launched into the air.

Tracers from the point defense flash out below me - until both remaining guns zero out. In the air, I release myself from my seat and spark my jumpjets.

Below me, my mech detonates.

On the horizon, I watch 288 engage the enemy.

288 closes with the bogey, tracers streaking between the two, maneuver jets flaring.

288 manages to get behind the bogey and tears the reactor core out - tossing it and firing a round at it before turning its attention back to the dying remains of the mech -

And slaughters the remainder.

I reach the ground.

I take a deep breath.

Thank Harry for the stimulant.

Thank 288 for the cover.

And run.

=====

Cast in order of appearance:

C - Control, the battalion’s handler. Used to be a pilot.

W - William, 896’s pilot. The most experienced pilot in the battalion.

H - Harry, 896’s AI. Leaves a copy of itself onboard when 896 ejects.

M - Maya, 512’s pilot. Relatively inexperienced. A rookie that tried to fill bigger shoes.

L - Liam, 288’s pilot. A vicious warfighter, leaving nothing to chance.

=====

Inspired by Armored Core VI and The Forever Winter.

[its-the-blob]

when i took math courses in college, we did a lot of proofs. so how proofs work (I am simplifying this extremely because I am not really a 'math person'. i am just a girl who doesn't trust professors and wanted to take a lot of courses with completely objective grading criteria) - if a thing in math is always true, you write out a bunch of logical statements and construct an argument that shows the thing must always be true. but if you can come up with even one mathematically valid example where the thing stated in the proof doesn't have to be true, you can't prove the statement, because it's not always true. those were my favorite proof assignments because they were short. you write something like (hypothetically) 'I found a situation where 2+2 will equal 5 so i'm not socratically examining this thing for you it's fake' and turn it in and get an A. it's great

anyway this post is about fiction writing, because pretty much any time ever that I see someone confidently assert 'stories always have to do x thing!' (the key word is the always, or the never, or similarly absolutist phrasing) I can find a situation where a work didn't do that thing and it was wildly successful in any way you want to measure success. the thing stated in the proof doesn't have to be true. there is no proof.

There is no 'always' in any art form. There are things that are much more or less likely to be successful, but there are no mathematical proof equivalents. When I see people claiming there are, I usually get the impression that they are relatively new to the craft, and just discovered a new trick, and got excited about it, and that's wonderful!!! And whatever technique they're talking about is probably a really handy one, and they're worth listening to- to an extent. But now they're telling everyone to follow this important new rule they've just discovered. for every story. But that may not be the right choice for a myriad of reasons (an author may not want the effect that technique produces, that effect is achievable other ways, etc).

'Ackshully' some of you may say. 'I am a published author and I've been writing twenty years and' well you just told me (as a random example, totally not thinking of save the cat) there's always a big crisis in the second act of every story, all of them. even though an 'act', itself, is usually a wobbly term because if the work didn't put in act division labels- or even if it did in some cases- different people could look at the end product and reasonably divide it up in different ways. So that makes me suspect a) if you really believe that you're a hack b) if you don't really believe that, you're a grifter selling fake knowledge to people trying to get started with the craft, Or, c) you're not good at teaching writing because teaching and writing are different skills and that's ok, but you should stop teaching. 👍or consider recruiting a statler and waldorf style duo to point out whenever you're wrong

[fayevalcntine]

I feel like any discussion on fandom and the centering of Lestat's (or even Louis's, which this fandom does quite often) feelings towards Claudia instead of centering Claudia's feelings towards both should also involve the show's narrative and how it clearly also centers HER PARENTS' feelings about her, because she's dead. And the show only utilizes her diaries, the reflection of her own inner world, to a certain (but unfulfilled) degree because at the time when we're introduced to them, they're in the hands of one of her fathers and the man who took part in orchestrating her death.

Obviously we can call out how other fans (and frankly this entire fandom) pushes aside Claudia's own character in order to focus on the men in this show (even Daniel is defended under the guise of "respecting" her more than Louis in season 1 just because of one moment in 1.07). Or how fandom often uses her to prop them up (even with Armand when people thought he'd be "the father that stepped up" with her prior to season 2). But the narrative of the show itself can also be questioned and dissected from this perspective because the sole reason why we get so much about Louis (and to a lesser extent Lestat) from her perspective and then so little on Claudia herself in various spans of time, is because Louis is giving Daniel only parts of her inner world, diluted even further from what survived back in Paris.

Even the first episode where Claudia is introduced makes this distinction of her role in Louis's life clear! She was firstly shown to us as "his redemption", a girl he saves from a fire only to damn her for eternity. Episode 4 of season 1 then ends with him announcing that she was "his daughter", which the show then goes on to display for us in various alterations of what Claudia and her role in his life was. There's entire years' worth of time where we never get to see Claudia's inner world. Among various years' worth of time, we never know what she did beyond her horrifying assault in the 7 years she was away. We frankly didn't see enough from Claudia's perspective in the 5 years she trekked across Europe. This entire show, which is supposed to be about the various perspectives of immortal beings, only offers us one episode that is from her point of view, before then pulling her to the side in various moments (sometimes not even having her words be on-screen for several episodes) so that other men who either defined her life for her and/or abused her take the stage. And I think that discussions about fans decentering her could also benefit from mentioning how the narrative itself deliberately does that at times, too. Because she's dead. She can never have her say because she couldn't live past the roles that all the men in her life assigned her to.

[cuteitgirlinspos]

౨ৎ How to romanticize this school year 🎀

I know school might be tiring , boring , or even scary , so here are some ways to romanticize this school year , next school year , and all the future school years to come

౨ৎ Stretch in the morning and drink water , usually when we wake up for school most of us don’t wanna get out of our bed and are extremely tired or drained out due to either waking up early or not getting enough sleep from last night 🎀 , so it is very important to stretch doing some poses you already know or watch videos on YouTube that are abt 5 - 10 mins depending on how much time u have , drinking water is also good for your skin and fastens your metabolism it will also hydrate you in the morning which can lessen how tired you were when you woke up . 🧚🏽‍♀️

౨ৎ sleep early , I know this might be very hard for some people because of the amount of things that they have to do , but you can limit the amount of time u take to do those things and take naps or sleep around 8 - 10 MAX , sleeping around these times are more healthy than sleeping around 12 pm or 3 am in the morning , your body needs the most rest it can get to keep it going 🎀

౨ৎ Please be yourself in school , many people tend to want to fit in and change themselves bc of what other people think , what their friend group says , or even how the internet influenced them to behave , you don’t have to change your behavior / personality just to fit in a group / area , real friends / loved ones will love you the way you are 💗🎀 .

౨ৎ Don’t disrespect teachers for no reason at all please 😭😭 , many teachers don’t get paid enough for dealing with kids all day long , make sure you’re being respectful to them and being nice / positive , one way you can do that is by simply greeting them good morning everyday or saying bye to them everyday .

౨ৎ PLEASE try on your grade , obsessing over your grade isn’t good either you don’t have to be sad / mad at yourself bc you didn’t get a 100% remember that everyone isn’t perfect , although you should try and bump your grades or try to be better at the subject you’re struggling with , when teachers notice you try your best in class they most likely bump your grade or try to give u extra credit even if you got a low grade . 🎀

౨ৎ Don’t start drama for no reason , trust me it’s not worth it ; you can get in trouble and that can be draining always try and be positive if someone else is being negative , rude , or annoying ; ignore them or don’t talk to them ; don’t try to engage with bad conversations with them to also get YOU in trouble , if you’re a good student and you barley get in trouble your teachers might let you go or not pay attention to it the first or 2nd time u get in trouble . 🤗

౨ৎ I can not stretch this enough , PLEASE organize your things , being organized can make school less stressful for you since you know where all your things are ! it’s much more easier than stressing when you need a notebook / paper / or an assignment and you can’t find it , an app that can help you be organized is notion ; using notion can track your to do’s like if you finished an assignment , need help with something , and be organized in general 🎀 .

౨ৎ Don’t be nasty , most people like me don’t like to hang around people who smell bad or do disgusting things , stick to a scent that smells good ; you don’t need a bunch of perfume sprayed all over you unless you have 2 or more perfumes mixed together that smells heavenly 😋 , PLEASE use deodorant and brush your teeth TWICE a day that way you can be clean and healthy , also take a shower everyday there’s no point of missing a shower be clean . 🎀

[cards-of-rose]

study tip!! how i write essays

going from a long, intensive classical education to my current history major, i've had to write a lot of papers. at this point, i can write a 5 page paper in a few hours, and just a couple weeks ago i wrote a 20 page paper in a single day. i graduated valedictorian with this method (current cGPA of 4.0!) so i thought i'd share how i write them! grab some coffee and settle in - it'll be a long post, but i promise it'll be worth it. :)

first, the topic. if you don't have an assigned topic, pick something that fascinates you, something that you could write pages and pages about. you will. if your topic is assigned, find something in it that you find fascinating. even if you find your topic completely boring, there's always something interesting to glean from it! once you find this, you'll gain motivation, and that's half the battle.

write down a basic outline. when i say basic, i mean barebones. just a vague, 3-point general idea of what you think you might write your paper about. this will guide you in your research! you don't need to worry about writing your full outline just yet.

sources. after you have a basic list of points, it's time to find sources! if they're already assigned, you can skip this step. most of the time they aren't, though. this is the most important part of your paper. you can go to google scholar to find really good academic journals and studies!

generally, the number of sources you have depends on the length of your paper! a good guide is that your amount of sources should number half the length of your paper. so if you have a 5 page paper, 2-3 is a good way to go. if you have a 20 page paper, you'll want around 10.

evidence. skim over your sources and categorize each one under the point you made earlier. this will mean you have a quick reference guide when you're writing, so you don't have to go through a big list of sources when you're looking for evidence! under each source, put a few bullet points talking about the info that you can use for your paper.

outline. this part may seem daunting. i promise, though, it's one of the easiest parts of the paper! you may feel tempted to skip it, but having an outline makes your paper sound better and makes it easier and quicker to write. use the sources and bullet point info you used earlier to fill out your outline. start broad and general, then add details as you do your research! your outline should be about half the length of your paper. don't worry about making it super scholarly - this is just for you, so make it as informal and easy to understand as you want! be stupid, throw in memes, whatever gets it written!

every outline should include an introduction, a body, and a conclusion. i can go over the structure of an outline in another post, but remember the 3 points you thought up earlier? these will form your entire outline, and eventually your essay!

finally, write! open a blank google doc and view it side by side with your outline. once you get started, it's a lot easier to finish than you'd think, especially if you took the time to outline! this is when you can make your dumb outline into something that would make the ancient philosophers proud. don't worry about perfection. just write it as you go. you can edit it later!

quotes/evidence. once you've finished your rough draft, it's time to add the evidence! some profs want quotes, others want you to paraphrase. either way, go through your paper and put in the evidence you researched earlier. don't worry about citations just yet - just put in the link in a comment on your rough draft. it won't be hard to fix it up later.

edit!! please, please don't finish your rough draft and be done with it. you can save so many points by going over it again instead of submitting it in a rushed 3am haze. fix spelling and grammar, add citations and a reference page, edit for clarity, anything you need to make it sound like the best paper you can write! if you're proud of it by the end, you know you've done something right.

congrats, you did it!! make sure you start your paper early and don't wait till the night before - your grade will thank you <3

[onlyjaeyun]

i’ve been following ur writing for some time now and i do have to agree with that anon who said you did CH dirty. you are a very talented writer so it’s just hard to watch.

you started off CH so strong with the lore and little chapters here and there but as it progressed you kind of just got lazy and it shows. when important events happened in the story, they weren’t conveyed through writing but through the texts (ie the riki and yn fight, that was definitely worth a written chapter) and it was honestly disappointing.

the ending isn’t much to say about either. yn and hoon barely go through development after the letter incident and all of a sudden they’re dating and married with a kid like two chapters later?

idk, if it was a mental health issue then i get that but even then you should’ve just gave it a break and thought everything out more. you could do so much better.

thank you for the feedback!

i wanna put you through the progess of a piece of writing from the POV of a writer okay? now keep in mind: i work two jobs, am a fulltime uni student and the daughter of an immigrant household with two parents who still work most of the day just so you know what else i have to deal with, besides my mental health okay?

now, i started off CH strong right? yes. i uploaded on the daily, fine i chose that. a chapter usually takes me around one hour if i actually sit down and focus on nothing but the chapter itself, which includes IG stories, editing, formatting etc. alright

on top of the daily chapters, i constantly replied to 40+ asks a day, a blessing in disguise because no matter how much i enjoy talking to you guys, the pressure does get worse the bigger that number of my inbox becomes, i hope this makes sense

now, i started CH back in october, right when my semester started, thats why i started off strong but as time went on, my assignments and private life got too busy and i guess i felt entitled enough as a writer to skip a few certain chaps and make life a little easier for me by making them regular chapters instead of written ones.

and this is gonna be my main point: i'm not a machine. i wrote a minimum of 5 THOUSAND words per written chapter, MINIMUM. we're talking about a 5-9 THOUSANDED worded chapter EACH WEEK. which usually took me about 6-7 hours, even allnighters.

yes, i chose to do that and maybe my time management wasn't the best but i had to create a compromise where i wouldnt have let you guys wait for over two months which would have resulted in me losing my motivation completely, and yet still focusing on EXAMS. because you know, i'm a fulltime uni student with TWO jobs 😮‍💨

if YOU think i did CH dirty go write an alternative ending yourself but it should be a minimum of 15 chapters including 5 written ones, with at LEAST 9k words each yeah? i wanna see you manage it all, pls prove me wrong snd show me you're better than me i'm genuinely begging bc it might inspire me to do "better" next time.

as a writer/artist/creator, and i can tell you probably arent one yourself or havent been one for long, the longer smth takes to come to an end the worse the pressure becomes which results in a blockage i dont wish upon my worst enemy i'm being deadass. i dealt with some of the worst writer's block ive had since i started writing literally 12 years ago and you're telling me i should have just "taken a break" and do "better"

i never, ever expected anything from anyone but some of you are so entitled to a writer's time and skill it's giving me a headache. maybe you didn't like the timing and writing of the last few chapters of CH and i guess that's unfortunate but this was so unnecessary because you completely dismissed everything else that could have been going on in my life and even belittled my mental health issues like im some fucking AI writing machine

do better, be nicer, write it yourself if you don't like it i'm so fucking over this

if i had gotten out of my own comfort and wellbeing and have actually written another set of written chapters i would have burned myself completely out. ive been in this fandom for not even a year and have already finished FOUR smaus with 50 chapters each, you do NOT get to tell me what i should or could have done better because you dont even give a fuck about me as a person this is just about receiving what YOU think YOURE entitled to but this is MY art and I will do what I see fit even if it's not what was expected of it because i'm a fucking human being with a life before i'm a writer on tumblr

oh, also: i do this for free ㅤ:) just a reminder :) this is my HOBBY :)

and don't you EVER call me lazy again when it comes to writing because i'm not gonna pour my heart and soul into a fic just for you to call me lazy when i literally wrote 50 THOUSAND words for this fucking fic just for the written chapters

goodbye

[dramioneasks]

Can u please recommend some full length rom-com style dramione

Random recs:

Benefits By: artemisgirl - M, one-shot - “I’m trying to make a case for why she should marry me,” Draco told him, scowling as Harry started laughing. “If I want an upgrade from ‘friends with benefits’ to 'husband with benefits'—” … When Draco Malfoy realizes that 'friends with benefits’ just isn’t enough anymore, he begins to strategize on how to get Hermione to commit to more.

Hot for Teacher - MotherofBulls - E, 26 chapters - Draco is a single dad trying to raise a teenager on his own. When he notices his son’s newfound interest in girls, he takes it upon himself to give him some fatherly advice. Little does he know that his son’s crush is none other than his own childhood nemesis, who has taken up the post of Defense Against the Dark Arts Professor at Hogwarts. Draco tries to juggle awkward situations, parenthood, and his own budding interest in Hermione Granger. Part 1 of “This Is Everything” series. COMPLETE!

The Bargain by Lincolepog - M, 29 chapters, Words: 102,657  - Heading back to Hogwarts for his 7th year, Draco Malfoy is given a very interesting deal from Hermione Granger; to play the role of her fake boyfriend. As time goes on, they learn to get passed their differences, but is it enough? What will it cost the two of them?

Starving by CharliPetidei - E, 5 chapters - Hermione has everything figured out. Sex is like food. Club nights are far too expensive. And men belong in the category of 'things that are more faff than they're worth'. You know, like hair straightening charms, lingerie, and mathematical integration. This is a story about food and sex, though not at the same time. Winner of best fluff, best smut, and runner-up for best use of prompt in the Dramione Fanfiction Forum's 2020 'Sounds Like Dramione' comp.

Draco Malfoy and the Mortifying Ordeal of Being in Love by isthisselfcare - E, 36 chapters, Words: 199,584 - Hermione straddles the Muggle and Magical worlds as a medical researcher and Healer about to make a big discovery. Draco is an Auror assigned to protect her from forces unknown – to both of their displeasure. Features hyper-competent, fiery Hermione and lazy, yet dangerous, Draco. Slow burn.

Bad Books and Second Looks - GracefulLioness - E, 10 chapters - Hermione has not been lucky in love. When a break-up forces her to find a new flat, she thinks she’s hit the jackpot. Until she realises that she might just be falling for her new flatmate’s boyfriend. Perhaps when Ginny lends her some of her steamy romance novels, her luck will change.

You Make Me Shiver and Shake by Stargazing121 - M, 16 chapters - Draco is an artistic genius, Hermione a budding art agent. But once they start to work together, will they be able to resist the growing attraction between them? “I’m not going to take you on as an art client!” Hermione scoffed. “Why not Granger,” he said. His tone was silky, like the sound of fine cloth running through your hands. “You know there has always been something between us.” “That won’t work on me,” she answered flatly. “Ok, I admit that was pushing it.” He shrugged, “But pushing against beautiful women is what I do best Granger.” “Not that either.” “Damn it, I forgot that trying to flirt with you was like flirting with a slug. Actually, I think I’d get more luck with the slug.” “You’d make a lovely couple. You’re certainly as slippery,” Hermione said. “I can think of someone I would rather form a partnership with,” he said, his voice low and almost a whisper.

Clueless - jacemorgensterns - T, one-shot - Draco is a college student living in an apartment with his roommate Theo. He occasionally gets into trouble and always gets away with it. When his luck is threatening to turn on him Hermione comes to to the rescue and an agreement between them forms that eventually spirals out of control. A Dramione romcom AU with as many romcom tropes I could fit in from Draco’s point of view. One-shot.

Fate Has It In For Me by jigglyjelly28 - T, 39 chapters, Words: 196,573 - “Seeing as you two have driven me half-mad over these few months with your Veela heritage problem, I thought that it would be perhaps, in Pureblood politeness, that you at least give a suitable explanation of what you’ve been doing.” Draco was told he was a Veela years ago but forgot. He’s been told again and has a year to find his Mate.

Accidental Proposal - CJRed - M, 36 chapters, Words: 108,673 - Hermione finds out that she is really a Nott, and there are so many rules to being a Pureblood, too bad Draco Malfoy seems to have forgotten one of the most important rules of all! Hermione/Draco. Theo and Hermione are siblings. Ignores epilogue and off canon in some other places as well. Set in 8th year. Language, Fluff, and Lemons. Complete.

-Lisa