#this asshole makes me feel worthless
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// personal
"of course your dad loves you!" today i was feeling rlly sad and i had some terrible back pain, so much i nearly cried, and instead of asking me what was wrong, my dad just told me i could call a fucking uber, lol. and he was annoyed instead of showing any concern. just bc he was with his friends and he didn't want to deal with me.
fucking asshole.
#lotus speaks#personal#venting#just bc my dad pays my shit doesn't mean he's a good dad#this asshole makes me feel worthless#that when i'm feeling depressed or sick#i should just leave and isolate myself#instead of bothering him#or anyone#AND THEN#he fucking dares to be upset when i don't ask for his help#WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS GODDAMMIT#sorry guys i'm feeling so angry rn#venting in tags#ranting#ranting in tags
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"higher education" is so fucking snobby dude... my distaste for academia and the educational system as a whole is just further amplified
#relic.txt#how are you going to make fun of a student while they present their thesis... to their face?#even if you dislike the student. and think their presentation is shit.#it's just unprofessional and petty#it didn't happen to me but it happened to a classmate and i just got pissed off#the entire comittee made fun of her for the whole duration of her presentation bc it wasn't the greatest thing ever but like#she was working full time for over a year obviously her grades n shit were gonna suffer lol#some people can't exactly afford school#i've never liked school and never will. it's a joke. you don't learn jack shit other than “your worth is only your academic success” which#barely means anything#can barely find jobs after finishing school too#and teachers in my experience have always been snobby assholes#who got bullied growing up and now take it out on students#learn as much as you can ALONE. do research ALONE. develop skills ALONE.#and also. don't feel like you're worthless because you “didn't have the brains to do something sciency” or w/e bullshit#and ended up doing manual work or whatever#that's amazing#everyone's good at their own specific thing#delete later#i'm just so done with school as a whole lol
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Making me think about the people I knew as a teenager is the best way to unlock any repressed anger or hate in my heart
#obviously not my friends. but like. man. i wish i could punch some of those ppl SO much. just beat the shit out of them.#i tried my damnedest to see the good in every one of them and i was SUCCESSFUL but like. they did not deserve my kindness.#i still get so angry when i think about the kid who’s ENTIRE online presence was making fun of ADHD and making jokes about how it’s fake#and like. so many of the ppl i played hockey with (speficially comp) were just. so awful. they hurt so many people including me#but i was so depressed i just took it cause i thought I deserved it and if i took it i wouldn’t be treated badly#but like. yeah they didn’t outright bully me because i made myself small. but they still were not kind to me and made me feel worthless#and yeah yeah i know therapy language they can’t *make* me feel anything but like. come on#those assholes refused to ever try to be friends with me. i assumed cause they thought i was gay but idk i was also weird so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#like every time i got to talking with them and tried to reach out they’d pull away and purposely exclude me#and over and over again it just made me realize I wasn’t worth shit to them. and since they were my world i felt like i was all worthless#googoogajoob
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₊˚ෆ HOW TOJI DEALS WITH OTHER MEN LIKING YOU <3
Tw- breeding, mentions of violence (not towards you), video recording. Not proofread
“Nuh uh don't hide this fucking pussy, show him how much you're creamin’ on my cock, don’t go all shy on me darling”. Toji laughed mockingly, his large hand effortlessly clasping both of your wandering wrists above your head to prevent any escape while using your phone to zoom in on the icky view of the mess between your mellowed thighs.
A streak of milky wetness glistened all over his massive cock, cascading down to his aching balls that were being captured in the filthy mess anyways because of how it's continuously slamming against your asshole that was coated with the cream that seeped out your gooey cunt.
"Fuck yeah, ya see that? See how this cute little pussy is wetting my dick? She sure as hell must be fucking loving it to be making this hell of a mess," he declared proudly. His deep, husky laugh resonated throughout the room, leaving no doubt that Toji was most likely losing his mind over the situation.
A few minutes earlier you told him about the guy from your class who confessed his feelings to you and you’re very uncertain about how to respond so you asked your boyfriend for some advice and well he decided to matters into his own hands.
“Tojii.. l-let go!” You cried out, attempting to dig your nails into his wrists as if that would make any difference, considering how fucking strong he is that it made your efforts almost laughably worthless.
“Nah don't think I want to darling, this fucker needs to know who the hell you belong to” he gritted his teeth at the thought of the guy even having the audacity to think you'd date him. You're all his and he would go to extreme lengths to ensure it remains that way.
The two of you were undeniably meant for each other and there was no fucking way in hell Toji would let some random fucker take you away from him.
“You wish this was you huh? Too fucking bad it's all mine to stuff and fuck, she belongs to me. Keep texting her and I’ll find you and bash your stupid fucking head in. Ya hear me?”. His brutal words cut through the air with a sharp edge, conveying possessiveness and veiled threats. It reverberated loudly, ensuring every detail was captured in the recording that the guy will be listening to soon after this.
His voice was deeper and harsher than normal, making your little cunt flutter even more around his stiffened shaft.
Which he obviously picked up on. “Ohhh you're such a slutty fucking whore baby, who am I kidding.” his grip on your bruised hands tightened. Threatening to leave more red, angry marks as he buckled his hips harshly into your ruined pussy. The force of his hips as he pushed into you aggressively showed literally no mercy.
“You’ll never fucking leave me, you're too fucking obsessed that your little cunt is twitching around me to the thought of me killing another man for you huh?”.
“N-no—” you stammered, turning your head away to look the other direction which made his grin widen even more as he playfully licked the faded scar on his lips because it had always been an indication of you lying whenever you looked away from him like that.
“Aww, that's fine doll," he murmured softly, his gaze unwavering as he directed the phone towards your fucked out face. His body sank deeper, inching downwards until his face hovered mere inches from your own. "you know what I'm thinking?”.
You peered your eyes at him and held contact in sheer curiosity.
“I’ll just breed this pretty fucking pussy and fuck a baby into you, how's that sound? Huh? You'll be such a good Mommy to our kid” his breath is now fanning against your face. Your body quivered at the thought, a deep longing stirring within you.
The thought of his suggestion made you moan, not just a normal moan. There's no particular way to describe it but the thought of that made your mind blurry and hazed. You and Toji always talked about having children in a few years but there's no harm in one now.
His possessiveness drove you crazy. Sure you knew Toji wasn’t a saint or an angel because at the end of the day, he murdered people for a living and because of that alone— he knew about the lonesome dangers of the world so he’s extremely overprotective and you’d loved every bit of it.
The thought of Toji even thinking you’d leave him for anyone else was an insult towards you because both of you were perfect for each other in every way possible.
“Y-yes! yes please, wanna carry your baby!” you babbled over and over, nodding your head like some stupid bitch as he proudly smirked at your reaction in amusement. “Yeah? Want me to make you a mommy? Get you pregnant so you'll be all full and swollen? Then everyone is gonna fucking know who you belong to”. The glint in Toji’s eyes was so dark, that it almost had you scared for a moment.
“Yesyesyes, please, m’so desperate Toji, fill me up–” you whimpered, tears glistening in your eyes as you pleaded fervently.
“Yeah fuck that, y’know what—” he mumbled to himself with a brief pause to stop the recording on his phone and swiftly hitting the "send" button to the guy that’s currently and patientlyyy waiting for your response in the chat. He casually tossed the device to the side and embraced you tightly, his strong arms enveloping you and wrapped around your neck to hug you before vigorously slamming his hips into you in an intense pace.
Unfortunately, the poor guy never had the chance to witness the adorable blessing you and Toji shared several months later because your boyfriend assassinated him on his way home the very next afternoon because he tried to speak to you again in person.
#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#toji fushiguro#toji smut#toji jjk#toji imagine#jujutsu toji#jjk toji#jujutsu kaisen toji#toji x female reader#toji x reader#toji zenin#toji x you#toji x y/n#kento nanami#suguru geto#choso kamo#geto suguru#nanami kento#jjk imagines#jjk smut#jjk x you#jjk x y/n#jjk x female reader#jjk x reader#jjk fanfic#suguru smut#suguru x female reader#jjk suguru#kento smut
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Pour it Up
Pairings: Stripclub Owner Sukuna x Stripper F!reader
Summary:- You are a single mother, your baby daddy is not just worthless, he also is actively trying to sabotoge you, so you go out on your own and raise your kid by yourself. Struggling your ass off, a friend of a friend named Toji decides to offer you a hell of a deal, a few hours a night at a strip club to make BANK. While there, you meet the other owner, Sukuna, and the moment he sees you? You annoy him how beautiful you are, how much he wants you, pushing him to insanity. He knows he must have you- no matter whose ass he needs to beat.
Warnings:- reader is a mom, lowkey/highkey Yandere Sukuna behavior, lots of drug use, drug dealing Sukuna (the club lowkey a front lol) hints of Mafia ties, EXPLICIT sexual content, blow jobs, cunnilingus, fingering, masturbation, teasing and eventually violence, some former trauma of reader. This part- Oral (M recieving) cum swallowing, dirty talk, drug use and masturbation- WC-6k
Based on Stripclub Owner Sukuna - IDK how many parts this will be, thinking four to six? That mobster art in the banner is by Sketch B on X- CHECK it- LINK
Playlist - Part Two>>>
Part One
“There you go, baby.” Toji murmurs to one of the pretty strippers, who is sitting right on his lap as he laps up salt off her breasts with his tongue, before taking the tequila shot she holds between them and downing it.
“Mr. Sukuna, are you ready?” Another dancer asks him, sitting on his lap, he proceeds to the same thing, licking her skin, moaning as he does, the tequila burning down his throat as he gulps, feeling it burn a trail down, he hisses at it, smacking the stripper’s ass when Toji lights up a blunt.
“Got a new girl comin’ in, Sukuna.” Toji mutters, inhaling and exhaling the puff of smoke, Sukuna takes the thick blunt and inhales the smoke into his lungs, feeling the effects of the alcohol and weed mingling as he watches the cloud of smoke release from his lips.
“Our best girl just left, I hope she’s good.” He hands the blunt back to Toji, who leans forward just a bit, blowing his smoke right into one of the girl’s mouths, she coughs and Toji snorts in laughter.
“She’s gonna make bank, plus she’s a friend of a friend, m’tryna help her out some.”
Sukuna bursts out in laughter then, throwing his head back. “You’re tryna help her out? With what, your dick?”
Toji scowls, lips set in a firm line. “Think I don’t help out friends, shithead?”
“Shithead?” Sukuna stands now, fists clenched. “The fuck you say, Zenin?”
“Ya heard me.” He grins as he stands too, the girls ooh and ahh at the two huge men clenching their fists.
“Wanna get some more scars on that mug of yours?”
“Ya act like you’re getting a hit in-”
“Is that the new girl!?” One of the strippers whispers, but loud enough for Toji to turn and grin.
“Lemme get her prepped.” Sukuna rolls his ruby eyes, ‘prepped’ sure, but he can’t help but be intrigued when Toji is so eager to go to her. He shrugs, however, he has a business meeting to get going with Gojo in about an hour, he has many, many profitable businesses that the government surely doesn’t know about.
Sukuna runs many, many things, up to and including running coke, and Gojo is a big player in that, the strip club although profitable is a bit of a cover for it, the girls all make extra bank to sell packs of it with each lap dance. And Sukuna and Toji, although they sometimes like to just beat each other up for fun, are actually decent partners at it.
“Candy, get the good shit for the meeting, hmm?” He says to her then, she nods eagerly, bending down to kiss Sukuna on the cheek.
“Of course Mr. Sukuna!” She runs off, in nothing but a thong, her ass jiggling nicely. Sukuna has to admit, life is pretty good for him.
Something feels empty, but nothing women, coke, weed and liquor can’t fill, along with beating up assholes here and there. No need for bouncers with Sukuna and Toji, though they had security but it was more for themselves, and rivaling members that loved to come try to fuck with their game or get a piece of it, but they were realizing something.
Sukuna is the King of this city.
He thinks he has this all figured out too, he has anything and everything he wants, filthy rich in fact now, and people fear him, or want to be with him, and that’s what he’s worked towards. As Candy gets back with the finest cocaine, he takes a line right off her inner thigh as she holds one up for him, her platform heel propped on his knee.
He chuckles as it hits him, and he can feel her heat, Candy is his favorite, but then he pauses, blinking as if he’s having some stupid insane vision when he sees the prettiest thing he’s ever seen. Something about the girl in the silver bikini makes him crave her like a drug, like anything he can fucking imagine, to the point his mouth drops open and he shoves Candy aside.
Just who is this girl?
Sukuna needs her, and needs her now.
He needs you.
You’re standing there, as Toji has you by an arm, shivering just a bit in your silver outfit, one he had borrowed from one of the girls so you could dance tonight. The lighting is low and seductive in the club, the music reverberating off the walls, a kaleidoscope of crimson, emerald and sapphire that bounces off the dark, polished wood of the floor.
There are rooms with red velvet drapes, and a mix of modern furniture and items that look vintage, including the red sofa with one of the just… largest men you have ever seen? Toji was already a huge guy, this man, his long lanky thighs, his broad shoulders, he takes over the entire room, and when he stands, staring at you with ruby eyes, it’s intimidating.
Toji you’ve known for some time, but even he couldn’t really compare to this man, towering over everyone in the room, shocking pink hair and tattoos all across his neck, a fancy three piece business suit but no tie, just an unbuttoned black dress shirt. You notice lipstick mouth prints down his neck, notice girls all over him before he literally shoves them out of the way to just stare.
You panic then, you are a mom, you have a couple stretch marks and maybe wider hips than before when you danced, but you think the outfit is flattering enough!? Toji told you you didn’t even need to cover up, his dark green eyes had devoured your body hungrily with a ‘ya look fuckin’ fine, doll’ so you at that point felt okay stepping out in this.
But the way this man - Toji said his name is Sukuna - is staring you’re unsure if he hates you on sight or something is just bothering him!? You stand there, nervously, knowing he’s an owner too, and wanting to make a good impression. “Hello… Mr. Sukuna, right?” You tell him your name softly, and he steps a little closer, your head falls back to look up at him.
“She’s the new girl?” He asks Toji, his voice deep and husky.
“Mmhmm, she’s a little rusty at dancing but she’ll catch on quick, won’t ya doll?” Toji slings an arm around your shoulder.
“Yes, I can pick it back up, I promise.” You say eagerly, Sukuna’s ruby eyes narrow, you inhale the scent of cannabis mixing with… a cologne or scent Sukuna has, so woodsy and musky it damn near lures you in, then Sukuna steps impossibly closer, eyes slowly draping down your body.
“I’ll see what you can do.” He smirks at you, trying to feign ease, as if he doesn’t wanna drag you in his office and fuck you right on that desk then and there, you look down shyly when he brushes your hair back, watching how the lights hit your pretty face. “Gonna show me?”
“Y-yes, of course. Can I just… practice a little?”
“Mmhmm.” He says, stepping back now casually, sitting on the couch, legs spread wide, you can see how the material of his slacks stretches over his thick, muscled thighs. He looks at you under his lashes, taking a glass of whiskey and sipping on it.
“It’s um… nice to meet you.” You say softly, as he struggles not to openly stare, hiding the swirling storm inside his gut, as he eyes your body, your every curve, how your tits sway, how you turn, how you move.
Sukuna says nothing, and Toji’s rough palm touches your waist. “You’ll do good, just go watch a couple of the girls for a few.”
“Thank you, Toji.” You say with a smile, and then Toji watches the pure thirst written all over Sukuna’s face, chuckling.
“You got the hots for her, huh?” Sukuna scowls at Toji as he sits back down, eyeing one of the bags of coke and taking a little bit of it up his nose, sighing.
“Who is she?” Sukuna asks gruffly, eyes the sway of your hips and how your body moves when you slowly circle the pole with the girls.
“She’s a family friend, got a kid and shit. Single mom, thought I’d bring her here, she’ll make plenty.” Sukuna hums to himself, eyes narrowing.
You’re a mother?
Your eyes catch him across the room, lowering shyly. “She seems too… shy and shit? Ya sure she’s stripper material, maybe a bartender?”
“She will make way more dancing, and she’s danced in the past. Can’t take you eyes off her, huh?”
“Shut it.” But he can’t take them off you, and as clientele start coming, he’s fucking furious that they’re even able to see you.
“She’s not an easy fuck, Sukuna, so don’t anticipate it.” Sukuna smirks, leaning his head on his hand as Toji sips on his drink, a girl dancing on him.
Sukuna doesn’t even take the next dancer who wants to be on him, too busy watching you, knees on the polished marble floor, garters on your thighs already full of bills, your pretty little smile, eyes that are just… hiding something. There’s something about you that’s making him insane, and he’s said five words to you, so enthralled he barely notices when Gojo comes in.
Wearing sunglasses in a dark strip club he grins at Sukuna now, before looking in his direction, whistling. “Oh mommy.”
“Jesus.” Sukuna rolls his eyes as Satoru eyes you.
“Shit, she’s new huh?”
“Mmm.” Sukuna glares as Satoru takes off his glasses, eyeing you up and down slowly, too slowly.
“Can I just… go to the stage first?”
“Sit the fuck down, Satoru.” Satoru snorts as he looks at Sukuna and Toji, who is snorting in laughter himself.
“Possessive of the new girl, hmm?” Satoru sits between Toji and Sukuna now, as Candy starts cutting three lines for them.
“Shut the fuck up.” Sukuna grumbles, some guy is sliding his fingers up your thigh, and you’re tensing, brows together. “Hey, no touching the girls, fuck face.”
“He’s down bad, huh?” Gojo mumbles, as Sukuna is standing, gripping the guy by his collar.
“Since the moment he saw her.” Toji looks at Sukuna’s line, then at Satoru. “Shit let’s split his line too.”
Satoru and Toji are busy snorting Sukuna’s coke as he proceeds to fling the man out of the club, and you’re staring wide eyed at him, the grown man looking like a little boy compared to him, dangling in the damn air. You nervously clean the pole, before stepping down, coming over to Sukuna then and touching his arm, he jerks, looking at you like you burned him.
“I’m sorry…” You murmur, easing your hand down, nervously fiddling with your fingers in front of you. “Thank you.”
“What!?” He demands, leaning low, hands in the pockets of his slacks.
“For that. Thank you, it wasn’t… I told him to back off. But I appreciate it, you are looking out for me.” You touch his chest now, it feels so natural to touch him, feeling his heart beat thumping against an apparently insanely strong chest, looking up at him under your long lashes that you put on for the night.
“I…” He can’t think of what to say then, you’re so sweet it should make him sick, but now he’s just feeling more want, more need. “You can dance for me tomorrow, then, show me what you got.” He manages gruffly.
“I absolutely will.” You say with a shy smile.
A shy stripper?
Who the fuck are you?
“I don’t have any other outfits yet, but I’m going to get some soon. Is it okay if I just wear this tomorrow?”
“Pshh, I’ll have some ordered.” You blink in surprise.
“Are you sure?”
“It’s nothing.” He pokes around on his phone for a few, eyeing your body up and down, lip turning up at the corner. “I bet I get your exact size.”
“What- how?”
“I’m an expert at tit size. Body size. Women.” You feel your cheeks heat up as he studies you, one of his dark brows raising, it has slits and this barbell in it that just make him more fucking attractive, doing erratic things to your mind.
“Well you can take it out of my-”
“Keep your money.” His gruff words and dismissive wave of his hand gives off the vibes that it’s nothing to him, but it’s a sweet gesture even if he’s acting as if it’s not one. “Come in early and dance for me, would ya. I wanna make sure Toji picked a good replacement.”
“Yes, Sir.”
You saying Sir makes him immediately think of painting that pretty ass with his big handprints, then drizzling his cum all over it, so lewd his cock throbs with need. What the fuck is wrong with him, he sees naked women constantly, why are you already irritating him like this. He glares, confusing the shit out of you.
“Tch.” Is all he says, then he walks away. You blink in confusion, shaking your head before looking at the time, realizing you have to leave if you wanna relieve the babysitter tonight.
Rushing into the locker room to change back into normal clothes, you’re shivering as you catch Sukuna outside, about to step inside a limo, when he looks at your surely silly clothing. You’re just in jeans and a hoodie as the chill of the air is out, even as he’s in a car full of girls in pretty dresses, surely you look silly to him you think as you wave goodbye.
But Sukuna is instead thinking of how someone could make a black hoodie look so delectable, picturing fucking you in just that. He ignores the girls in the car as he, Gojo and Toji head out to the club, for more negotiations. He ignores anyone and everything, instead you’re wrecking his mind.
How annoying.
*****
You are exhausted the next morning, as you spent the day with your little three year old, but you’re so blessed because just one night at the club and your fridge was full. Despite his father being rich, he did nothing to help you all out, and not just that he got you fired from your last job, by refusing to pick him up just once, and your boss had enough of you always being late or leaving early.
Your family tried to help out but you were pretty stubborn and wanted to take care of her yourself, also they weren’t dripping in money, quite the opposite in fact, they were struggling and also lived pretty far. You’d been so dumb, you think now, running off with him like that, so blinded by everything that he was saying to you, everything he was making you believe.
You were an idiot.
And not only was he a piece of shit in many aspects, he was dangerous, very dangerous, running with the mafia, things you learned quickly when men showed up at your home with guns. After a furious fight, you’d forgiven him (also like an idiot) but what you couldn’t forgive was also the constant cheating, the making you feel like it was your fault he had to.
After the third time of finding him with someone, you finally packed and left, taking all you had which was barely a thing with your baby boy. He’d threatened you over and over to come back, but you absolutely could not do so. The pain of being with him was too much, especially as he became darker and darker, as he downed you more and more.
Your mind keeps whirling to Sukuna, for some reason the very way he looked at you did shit you haven’t felt in years. You felt excited and nervous, as you even tip your sitter that evening, getting your little boy settled, brushing back his soft hair. “You don’t have to give me this much, babe.”
“Please, you’re a lifesaver!”
“He literally sleeps and I watch Netflix.” She says, and you sigh.
“I know but really, I should be making way more to pay you.” She smiles softly, shaking her head.
“Go on now.”
You’re hastily running inside the locker room, pouring out some makeup from your bag when Sukuna strolls in, tilting his head as he sees you. “Shit, I’m sorry I know I look…”
You look fucking beautiful, bare faced, but Sukuna’s words get caught in his throat. Instead he smirks, opening a locker and handing you a combination. “Got you a few things.”
“Oh thank you so much!” You peer then, at the slinky material, the glitter and mesh outfits, blushing at how much they reveal. “These are so pretty.”
“Just had one of the girls order some shit.” He brushes it off, as you look up at him like that, driving him insane with need for you, you’re in some hoodie and a messy bun again and he doesn’t think that he could find you more attractive, thinking of lifting your hoodie up and sliding inside you.
His thoughts make his head spin, which makes him scowl at you now, why do you have to do this to him? You blink a bit, frowning. “Something wrong?”
“Tch, no, just… get ready. You’re late as fuck you know.”
“I know, Toji said-”
“He givin’ you a hard time, Ma?” Toji saunters in now, and Sukuna glares over at him.
“No, not at all, he bought me outfits actually.” You say softly, holding one up, some little plaid strap of a skirt and a plaid tie. “Ooh this is so hot.”
“Buying girls outfits, Sukuna?” Toji asks curiously, Sukuna rolls his ruby red eyes, shaking his head.
“She didn’t have shit, you should’ve thought to, idiot.”
“Wanna take this out-”
“Hey, hey… I’ll totally pay you back, Mr. Sukuna.”
“No.” Is all he says, as you’re yanking off your hoodie and then your shirt, and you’re just… bare to him, but not just him, to Toji, who he wants to smack for even looking at you. You try on the little outfit, all giddy and giggling, the way your pretty tits look almost take him out. “I have… shit to do.”
Toji snorts, and you look on curiously at him, as you now take off your jeans and hook the little skirt on. “I can’t tell if he likes me or hates me.” You mumble, earning Toji’s laugh.
“Oh he likes ya alright, alright doll, go get ready, it’s about to get real busy in here.”
“Got it.”
Soon you’ve got your wig on, a pink silky one, and glitter dusted all over your skin, you’re getting ready to do a set, nervously spinning around the pole, your muscles are not what they used to be, so you can feel the pull, can see where the floor will be bruising your knees. You’re bending over as men throw bills at you, but you keep catching them, those glinting red eyes of his.
His eyes make you feel like he’s touching you, with those big tattooed hands, you try to shake it off but when he watches you it truly is like he’s touching you. As you meet his eye and rest a hand on the pole, moving your hips in a figure eight motion, you see him through that cloud of smoke, over his glass of whiskey, watching.
After your set is done you come to him, knowing it’s time to show him your dance moves - which you’re not sure are any good anymore. Sukuna tilts his head, and spins a seat on a smaller stage off to the right, eyes raking over your body hungrily. “Time for the show, hmm?”
“Y-yes.” You’re shaking damn near, so close to this man, he just does things to you by existing that you can’t really explain, and now you’re on your knees before him right on that stage, as he hungrily drinks you in. He’s puffing on a blunt, holding it up, but you shake your head. “No thanks.”
“A shy stripper who doesn’t even smoke, huh?” You swear he can see your blush even in the dark room, with the neon lights bouncing off your glittery skin.
“I mean I have before.” You move your hips now, rolling them, turning around and arching up your ass, knowing he can likely see the wet spot in your panties as you do, caused by his very presence.
Sukuna exhales, leaning closer, smoke blowing right against you almost, you feel the warmth and have to bite back a cry, as you shake your ass for him, and he’s thinking of railing you right there. Fuck he wouldn’t even give a shit if anyone saw, actually, as he watches you look back at him, smiling just a bit, so shy and sweet.
“A shy ass stripper, how’s that gonna work though?” He asks, and you’re slinking onto your tummy, he sees it then, the wet spot forming, making him want to rip those panties off and fully see that pretty pussy, so hungry it’s sucking your panties right against your lips.
“Is there no appeal in shy strippers, Mr. Sukuna?” You tease, turning back around, spreading your thighs, pulling at the damp material as he damn near crushes the blunt with his fingers.
“Hmm. So what made you come here?” He asks, voice gruff when you sit back up, breasts right in his face only covered with thin white gauze, he can literally see your nipples tighten as he smokes the blunt again, blowing the smoke up and over you both, cock straining against his boxers.
“To make money?” He smirks when you sigh and take the blunt, inhaling it and coughing all cute, your eyes watering.
“Took a pussy ass hit.”
“I tried!” You glare now, fuck you’re cute.
“Yeah, yeah. Heard Toji say you got a kid.” You pause now, eyes locked on his, heart racing in your chest.
“Is it a problem I do?” You whisper, and he grows serious, shaking his head now, making you exhale in relief.
“Lots of the girls do. The dad not around?”
You laugh without humor. “He sure the fuck isn’t, but he somehow still is, if that makes any sense.”
“Messy?”
“Mhm. This way I get to see him all day and make money, I couldn’t afford full time childcare, my friend is helping for a few hours at night.”
“Ah. Get up there for me.” He murmurs, and you stand, spinning in a slow circle, he notices stares of other men even though you’re off to the side, temporarily thinking you’re just with him instead. “Fuck…”
“Is it okay? I’m rusty and a little out of shape right now.” You say, as you slide back down, coming to your hands and knees, Sukuna takes in every pretty inch of you that’s on display, including a couple stretch marks along your skin that just make you sexier. When you see that you pull up the skirt a bit, nervous. “Shit, sorry…”
“For what? They’re sexy as fuck.” You are blushing furiously, overheated as his thumb brushes over one, the first contact you’ve damn near had with him, shooting desire straight through you.
“You’re being nice to me.”
“I’m not nice.” He says with a bark of a laugh, and then eyes some of his business partners coming in. “These men will pay good, why don’t you just dance for them?”
“Won’t the other girls get upset?” You ask, and he shrugs a broad shoulder.
“Really don’t fucking care, I run this shit.” He puts the blunt out into an ashtray, leaving you with goosebumps, as a strip club owner makes you feel sexier than you ever did with your ex, making your mind race.
Just who was he?
*****
The next week goes by, and every time you’re on a shift, Sukuna is there, he’s always got eyes on you, until it becomes damn near an obsession. If anyone even comes near you the wrong way he’s kicking them out, he puts you in every perfect time to make bank, he’s constantly watching you dance, looking at every pretty outfit he’s buying you.
Soon, Sukuna can’t help but start stroking his cock after your dances, locked in his office, picturing pressing the tip between those plump lips of your pussy, dying to fully see it. He’s got a big hand wrapped around his veiny length at least twice during your shift, and instead of fucking Candy or any of his regulars, he starts ignoring them all, because he needs you.
Sukuna goes so far as to take your panties, you must be curious where three pairs have gone, but he can’t help it, he loves to put them against his face, to stroke his cock with them, until he’s busting a nut all on your panties. He’s irritated, infuriated at this change of events you’ve brought, and he’s short and terse with you, but he still looks out for you even so.
It’s why you can’t help but run to his office, when you see him, your ex is right in the club, and you know he’ll recognize you. Terrified, you're quickly striding into Sukuna’s big fancy office, only to pause at the sight of his huge cock in his hand, gulping as you shut the door, looking away.
“I’m so, so sorry… I…” You turn around, you can’t help but watch the pearls of white precum pumping out of his reddened tip, his tattooed hand pausing his movements, frozen as he eyes you. “It’s my ex, I didn’t want him to see me, shouldn’t have just…”
“Want me to beat him the fuck up? Kick him out?” Sukuna asks then, huffing as he strokes his cock up and down while you step closer, the sight so erotic, as you’re even closer you see it, a little piercing on the underside of his cock, tempting you so badly to take it in your mouth.
“You would do that?” You whisper, leaning over him now, while he twists his fist from the base to the tip, so casual, as if this is a normal conversation, while you wonder if you could even take that much dick.
Shit you’d try.
“Just say the fucking word, I’ll end him for you.” You shake your head now.
“No, you’re already so good to me, Mr. Sukuna.” Your voice is soft like a caress as you eye him, watching his cock jerk in response.
He laughs harshly. “Am I?”
“Why don’t I be good to you?” Sukuna’s brain short circuits when you gently take his hand, sucking the precum off his fingers, wearing nothing but a mini skirt and fucking tassels, he moans at the sight of your cheeks hollowing as you taste him.
“Fuck…” He has been with plenty of women, no one has ever left him speechless like this, just with that little movement. He takes those fingers then, slipping up your inner thigh and shoving your thong to the side, sinking them in, you gasp out, a sexy little whine from your throat destroying him. “Gonna be good to me, huh?” He asks huskily, as he curls his fingers.
You’re gushing down them, nodding and taking his enormous cock in one hand, bracing yourself with the other, barely able to cover a bit of him, stroking him with your soft hand instead, he moans, eyes laser focused on your pretty face. Your pupils are so enlarged he can barely see your pretty eye color, your lips parted when he presses that spongy spot in your gummy little walls.
“Wanna suck me brat, hmm?” You nod now, and he’s trying to keep it together, but when he’s sucking you off his fingers, his cock twitches, oozing more cum when you’re on your knees, looking at him under your lashes.
He yanks your wig off then, letting your hair loose, gripping and pulling while you swirl your tongue along his tip. Sukuna’s never felt like he’s going to bust from a lick, but here you are, ruining him, a mix of him wanting to beat the shit out of anyone who has ever touched you, and wanting to fuck your pretty throat, and your pretty pussy, until you’re drooling.
“Want me to fuck your little throat?” You nod, unable to speak or think, you don’t just do this, but you’re aching, cunt throbbing around nothing as You take as much as you can, breathing through your nose while Sukuna fucks up into your throat over and over, choking and gagging on him, pussy drooling past your panties. “Oh my f-fuck… right there.”
“Mmm.” Is all you can manage, when his big hand is entangled in the nape of your neck, bobbing your head up and down his cock, feeling your tongue swirl around his tip, as he pictures fucking into that pussy he tastes on his fingers again. Picturing burying his face inside you.
What are you doing to him?
He’s losing it further as you suck him as deep as you can, tears in your pretty eyes, so eager, he’s sucking in a breath at feeling just a hint of your teeth hit him, just a nipple on the tip as you take a breath of your own, licking at his piercing. “Look at you, doing such a good job, aren’t you? Slutty lil fuckin brat.”
You really should not like hearing it, but you’re wetter now, so wet you reach down to find your clit, moaning around his length, close to cumming just from how he’s ruining the back of your throat. It burns and stretches as you’re sucking him deeper and deeper, his thrusts hard, fucking your mouth now.
“That’s it, want me to fuck this pretty face, huh? That all those goddamn looks you give me- fuck… y-you… oh my… shit, slow down…” You’re sucking harder though, even when he pulls on your hair, even when he yanks your hand off your clit, sucking your little fingers. “Wanna fucking wreck you, ruin you, god…”
You’re sucking him harder, feeling the piercing roll on your tongue as he sucks you off your fingers, until he’s gasping, and you swear you hear this huge man with a good nine inches whine. Yes, that’s the sound that comes out of those vermillion lips as he shoves your head down, until you’ve got him all the way in the back of your throat, busting inside it.
You’re choking on salty but somehow sweet cum, drinking it all down as you exhale through your nose, mascara leaking down your cheeks as you take him all, and Sukuna literally can’t even see for a minute. He’s crying out like a little bitch all because you’re somehow psychotically good at sucking him!?
“Fuck… you brat… didn’t wanna bust-fuck!” He’s groaning now, yanking you off finally, and looking at those mascara trails on your pretty cheeks, at your fucked out expression and swollen lips.
“Didn’t think I’d swallow before I got a kiss.” You whisper, voice hoarse, and he yanks you up now, having you straddle his lap, cock still hard, just a little softer, but Sukuna on soft was still huge. You look right at him, your breaths coming in little pants as he studies you, moaning softly, brushing a thumb over your lip.
“Ya want a kiss? So fuckin’ sappy, huh?” He demands, and you smile just a bit, leaning closer, your lips a breath away.
“You so badass you don’t kiss girls, Sukuna?” It’s the first time you’ve just called him that, and the way he can almost taste his cum on your lips ends him, but he sure won’t show it, instead he’s gripping your tits, watching your face scrunch up in pleasure, smirking up at you.
“Wanna kiss me so bad? Want me to fuckin’ fill you?” He whispers, and you whimper then. “Pathetic.”
“Please.” Is all you whisper, and he’s kissing you then, when he kisses you he thinks he likes it as much as busting in your damn mouth, if that’s even possible, his tongue drippy and messy as it wars with yours. He’s drinking your cries, pulling your body so close against his.
“Shit…” He mumbles, he’s never felt anything like this, yeah he kisses because it’s kind of hot to, but you do something, something in his tummy clenching right along with yours, you feel it, that energy, as your puffy cunt presses on his again hard cock, and he’s biting your lower lip so rough.
“Sukuna…” You whisper, whining out, forgetting your ex completely, forgetting anything right now, and he looks at you under sooty pink lashes, making your pussy throb in need.
Sukuna kisses you hungrier now, his hands all over you, rough and hot and brutal, when suddenly the door opens, and Toji whistles. “Damn, okay… I got no chance, huh?”
“Toji get the fuck out.” Sukuna grumbles, but you panic then, remembering who you are. You have a kid and you’re just… on your knees sucking this man’s dick, about to fucking ride him.
It’s one thing to dance, but how are you losing yourself so quickly in him? It was like every problem faded, but it’s stupid, so stupid.
“I should go, I’m sorry…” You’re running out then, and soon you’re getting ready to leave for the night, when Sukuna corners you against the wall, the wind blowing through your hair as he bars you on either side with big muscled arms. “Sukuna…”
“You just ran, the fuck?” He grabs your chin, making your eyes meet his. “Come over tonight.”
You gasp then. “But… you got off.”
“And you didn’t, what kinda man are you taking me for, hmm?” His words make that ache return, as he’s got a thigh between yours, hissing. “She wants to cum, doesn’t she?” You nod weakly.
“I’m… I don’t do this.”
“And I don’t ask to do this.” He doesn’t beg either, but he’d beg for you, god he would. “Come let me take care of you.”
“I can’t…”
“Stop thinking and-”
“No, I can’t, I have my kid.” He pauses then, falling back just a bit, despite having this obsession with you, he still does not know enough yet, about your life, about you. He finds himself enamored as his lips part, and he studies you, the light from the moon glowing and casting a million diamonds off your still glittery skin.
God you’re so beautiful.
“When are you free?” He asks, and you sigh.
“Maybe tomorrow night? I’d have to pay my-”
“I’ll pay whatever extra.” He cuts you off. “Just… make sure you have a night.”
“Okay…” You never spend much time without your kid, it makes you just a little nervous, but something about him is luring you in, drawing you closer. “I mean he’s asleep anyway at night so I should be able to have the sitter stay.”
“He? A son?” He murmurs, and you nod, smiling a bit as he now is walking you to your car, the way you light up is so pretty, as he eyes your shitty ass car. God he can’t wait to take care of you, he thinks, have you dripping in money.
“Yes, a son. He’s my everything, it’s why I’m here.”
Sukuna wants to be something to you. He sighs then, seatbelting you in, a gesture caring and sweet, Sukuna is an enigma you realize, as he cups your face, eyeing your lips, and you wonder wildly if he will kiss you, but he just hovers. “I’ll see you tomorrow, hmm?”
“Yes. Goodnight, Sukuna.” You whisper, as he shuts your door, watching you drive away.
You will be his, there’s no choice really.
Okay I know this isn't like my other storieesss but it's been killing me and I need to get it out. Hope it's not too crazy lol? Sukuna is gonna be even more Yan as we go lol
Taglist# 1 - @naammiii @naina326 @1worm1 @yenayaps @shokosbunny @sukubusss @msniks @kittyyyyykats @nyxly1412 @trashsuarecan @dumbbunny98 @monster-effer @tojis-ball-sack @tangsakura @friesnkwtchup @uhnosav @lhhlver @attackonnat @moonchhu @mat-mat-mat @cherryjain17 @havkjhdecs @stargirl-mayaa @waterfal-ling @the-dark-creature @lulunx @minaa-06 @spacefae-x @deitysdream @sorahatake @gojoscumslut @stainednailpolishremover @kidd3ath @clp-84 @rinkomei @catastayy @oneirataxiaa @inthedarkshadows000 @travistheaussie @cold-blooded-girls @emi311 @blublublubby @fluttershyfangs @actuallynarii @7thsthings @ilovemeni @erluu @for-hearthand-home @angellliqua
#sukuna ryomen#jjk smut#sukuna smut#sukuna x you#sukuna x reader#sukuna x y/n#Divider by cafekitsune#jujustu kaisen#sukuna x female reader#ryomen sukuna x reader#ryomen x reader#ryomen sukuna#ryomen x you#ryomen x y/n#jjk sukuna#jjk x reader
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Mickey they could never make me hate you. Even WHEN you were the dirtiest white boy in America. V THAT MAY BE TRUE but he's also soooo pretty so he gets a pass cuz he's so babyboy and babygirl and an angel that deserved so better like fucking love and compassion and pride and adoration from his fucking shithead father. (if you can't tell I'm on my season 2 shit) honestly he was so much more dirty white boy tm in season 1 tho...
”I came out for you, you piece of shit”
YES YOU DID MICKEY. YES THE FUCK YOU DID.
#mickey milkovich they could never make me hate you#mickey milkovich is a perfect angel#babygirl has never done anything wrong a day in his life#the babygirlification of mickey milkovich#the dirtiest white boy in America#i think crying in iggys arms about all the shit terry used to do to him would heal him honestly#like i think maybe mickey had suicidal tendencies that iggy never knew about and he almost succeeded one time#when the shit with svetlana happened and she brokenheartedly made him promise to fucking stop when he overdosed on some pills and he did#but it didnt stop him self harming until the day he didnt feel so trapped with no way out and hearing all that fucking broke iggys heart#and he apologizes to mickey for abandoning him because thats his lil bro and he never knew he was hurting that bad#and maybe mickey always thought iggy would kill him for being gay if he ever ran into him but wouldnt seek him out cuz of his worthlessness#so when he finally runs into iggy on the west side hes fucking scared cuz he was wrong iggy finally decided to hunt him down and kill him#and that broke iggy almost as much as the feeling suicidal for the longest time and he didnt even know thing#and he ends up telling mickey that hes actually known mickey was gay since he was 13 and he now wishes he would of been there for him#wishes that he wouldve protected him and let him know it was ok but he cant change the past but he wants to be there for him now if allowed#i just fucking need mickey and iggy bonding#i need mickey and iggy hurt/comfort#maybe its revealed that mickey used to sneak into iggys room as a little boy at night after/when terry was a monster and cry in his arms#while iggy kissed his hair until he fell asleep when mickey falls to his knees and starts crying like a baby in his arms and iggys rocking#with mickey and kissing his hair and telling that hes here for him just like old times and mickey says “ 's the only time i ever felt safe#“ 'y were my safe place” and iggys all like i know im sorry babybrother and maybe lip walks in on it and is an asshole about it#cuz he thinks its weird but ian is having NONE of it cuz his baby NEEDS this but lip also feels bad for mickey#cuz its fucked up that he wanted off himself cuz his dad had him feeling trapped and dead inside and wanting to do anything to get away#and maybe hes not so much of an asshole to mickey after cuz ians right mickey DID need that#idk where the fuck this came from cuz this so wasnt the original point of the post or the reblog at first but here we are#and i really need this fic cuz just mickey and iggy hurt comfort like this would be heartbreakingly beautiful#mickey milkovich#i think i need to iterate that its mandy that makes mickey promise to stop trying to commit suicide not svet#cuz he would do anything for mandy even when she leaves and the urge still stays cuz she was heartbroken when she saved him from the attempt#and hed never wanna hurt her like that again even when she leaves and hes fucking hurting still but hed never want to put her through more
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its like. i KNOW, on some level, that its kind of fucked up that dad and mom are like. not talking to me or reaching out and they never have ven when i was a kid, and i know on some level its pretty fucked up how little they care about me yet somehow want a say in EVERYTHING in my life
and its kinda fucked up that i asked my dad about a hypothetical scenario where i rent that really shitty apartment he has in the basement for a little while after finally getting rid of the house i currently live in. just so ill have somewhere to live until i find a better apartment somewhere. and somehow my brother gets 12k a month and only pays 4k ish but i make 18k a month so i should ay 10k in rent just cus
and somehow im just a trash heap so when i moved into the house i got a bunch of crap my parents just didnt want. my old stuff from when i was a kid?? okay thanks for the toys but can i ssell them or give some of them to my little sister? NO. what if my little sister comes to visit. they dont fucking visit me more than once a year at most and they only visit my neighbours or show up when im not around. baby pictures??? stuff i had when i was a baby like a toy and some shit drawings from when i was a kid???? WHY WOULD THEY GIVE ME THAT. its stuff that should be sentimentally important enough for dad to keep, not give to me cus theyd feel bad throwing it away or give to me cus it was taking up space. mom kept the big photoalbum books i had to go get from dads house before they sold it even tho it was all packed away and probably hadnt been in a bookshelf for a while and i didnt even get my own babypictures or the album even tho mom said i was gonna get it when i moved out some furniture and shit?? mom didnt wanna get rid of a fucking bench with drawers so he asked me if i wanted it?? i said okay but like if i try selling it is she gonna want it back? and she even tried buying an unopened box with a dresser in it (i dont have space for it anywhere. YET.) from me even tho i said i needed it. she couldve just asked where she got it or some shit, they literally still sell it at the store and you can order it online and dad and stepmom came with some mats and lamps for me "in case i needed some" so thats lying in the garage taking up space cus i dont have any use for them. they even gave me a fucking roomba even tho i didnt think itd help and i never used it and now they want it back cus they wanna give it to grandma. like i get the logic but why give it away if you want it back.
and like. most of my shit is secondhand from family. because the solution to all my problems is apparently not getting me the fuck out of that house, its Giving Me Things. i just got picked up from the psychiatrists office or i have a headache and feel awful or i almost had a panic attack, but dad cant drop me off at home or even at moms house cus that takes 10 minutes extra so instead i get a soda. cus that makes up for him just letting me have a headache or literally driving me aorund for 3 hours cus hes got "chores" (checking out used car dealerships for more cars he can buy so he can fix them cus his hobbies are so important he cant just put them aside and make sure were fed or have clothes, thats mom and grandmas job)
so instead of actually trying to help me or spend time with me they give me shit. i dont see people for literal months and im literally crying daily for hours in the middle of fucking winter and nobody even fucking talks to me but the best way to fix that?? give me a christmas tree and ornaments. give me some of their old decorations too. bail on me to stay home for new years eve but thats okay cus i got a christmas tree they bought for me cus that fixes everything i dont have a table and chairs to sit in the livingroom or kitchen and im almost having a mental breakdown cus i think THATS whats missing and having more furniture is going to fix the complete lack of any connection with other people cus if i have a big house and i have stting space people will actually bother visiting. so ofc dad gives me their old furniture from their cottage, theyve been meaning to get rid of it so they can replace it anyways. literally giving me their unwanted shit cus its easier. going to the thriftstore with me is too much work and i cant get to any of the more remote but cheap furniture stores but thats okay cus they dont care and for as long as they dont have to drive me or spend time with me all is well.
like it is no fuckin wonder im struggling to even save up money when i keep buying shit cus thats literally what always happens when im with family. we go on a daytrip somwhere to buy shit cus there no fucking connection there thats worth even trying to deal with, so the whole idea of an experience or bonding isnt really applicable. being a kid and hanging out with the paternal side of the family was literally always a shopping trip where we bought new clothes. cus dads cheap and didnt wanna spend his precious hobby money on clothes, he wants to fix cars for months then sell them for a couple extra hundreds, and my uncle and aunt and cousin only visited for weekends every now and then so it wasnt often either. but it was practically every time.
like even when im alone in the city or somewhere i wind up spending money on shit cus i just. dont have the self control and who gives a shit anyways its not like ill be able to ever save up for anything and atleast this way i get something i want besides just groceries or whatever. and maybe if i buy the right things ill have motivation to actually do shit like having hobbies or fixing my life and if i have the right aesthetic ill atleast feel less like all my shit is embarrassing and childish and i wont get tired of it as easily ig. but also like whats the fucking point of anything. it feels like im no allowed to get things i genuinely want or thhink would help and im not allowed to switch things out when theyre not working. im not allowed to get a new desk cus i have an old one i dont want and never use, i have a new one ive never used and thats driving me insane because of the size and how can i know it doesnt help or work or makes me wanna draw if i havent even tried it. so i already have stuff so im not allowe dt get new things or nicer things.
except a new desk would atleast let me clean my room properly and itd give me more space and maybe if i was allowed to do that id finally draw again us id have somewhere to put my art stuff and somewhere nice to sit. maybe itd make stuff easier and nicer for me?? is that not a good reason. especially considering everything else. im fuckign depressed, ive been for years and im only now starting to get a little better, i have a house i dont wanna fucking live in most of the time cus its just one big boring fucking chore and i cant even afford it. i cant even clean it properly or fix anything cus why bother, i dont wanna fucking be here i hate it here. it sucks and its lonely and its not even functional and nothing works and i cant even decide on a wallcolor without everyone else giving me their input whether i ask for it or not. i have 40k in an account and im not even allowed to look at it and i didnt even know i had it cus mom never fucking told me about it. i literally just wanna get rid of everything and start over and move somewhere and actually have a car and a job i enjoy that i actually get paid for and some mental stability so i can go to the job and get dishes and laudnry done without it being a fucking struggle every god damn time.
#talkies#long post//////////////////////////////////////////#so yeah. im gonna go do laundry and maybe ill make macaroni for dinner. idk what ill put in it tho. maybe cheese or some shit#anyways the point of the post was i know on some level hat this shit is kinda fucked up. but im used to it so i dont actualy know how much#and its hard to feel like im allowed to be upset due to neglect + emotional abuse and so on cus i wasnt allowed to have feelings other peopl#people didnt want me to have. and i was usually yelled at for bing upset about literally anything ever no mater what it was#and im so used to being treated this way that i feel like its my fault cus im worthless and its selfish to want people to actually care abou#t me. and it feels weird cus its like. am i allowed to be upset about this. is this my own fault? am i an asshole for all of this? it feels
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Please, if you can, take a moment to read and share this because I feel like I'm screaming underwater.
NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) stigma is rampant right now, and seems to be getting progressively worse. Everyone is using it as a buzzword in the worst ways possible, spreading misinformation and hatred against a real disorder.
I could go on a long time about how this happened, why it's factually incorrect (and what the disorder actually IS), why it's harmful, and the changes I'd like to see. But to keep this concise, I'll simply link to a few posts under the cut for further reading.
The point of this post is a plea. Please help stop the spread of stigma. Even in mental health communities, even around others with personality disorders, in neurodivergent "safe" spaces, other communities I thought people would be supportive in (e.g. trans support groups, progressive spaces in general), it keeps coming up. So I'm willing to bet that a lot of people on this site need to see this.
Because it's so hard to exist in this world.
My disorder already makes me feel as if I'm worthless and unlovable, like there's something inherently wrong and damaged about me. And it's so much harder to fight that and heal when my daily life consists of:
Laughing and spending time with my friends, doing my utmost best to connect and stay present and focused on them, trying to let my guards down and be real and believe I'm lovable- when suddenly they throw out the word "narcissist" to describe horrible people or someone they hate, or the conversation turns to how evil "people with narcissistic personality disorder" are. (Seriously, you don't know which of your friends might have NPD and feels like shit when you say those things & now knows that you'd hate them if you knew.)
Trying to look up "mental health positivity for people with npd", "mental health positivity cluster bs", only to find a) none of that, and b) more of the same old vile shit that makes me feel terrible about myself.
Having a hard time (which is constant at this point) and trying to look up resources for myself, only to again, find the same stigma. And no resources.
Not having any clue how to help myself, because even the mental health field is spitting so much vitriol at people with DISORDERS (who they're supposed to be helping!) that there's no solid research or therapy programs for people like me.
Losing close friends when they find out, despite us having had a good relationship before, and them KNOWING me and knowing that I'm not like the trending image of pwNPD. Because now they only see me through the lens of stigma and misinformation.
Hearing the same stigma come up literally wherever I go. Clubs. Meetings. Any online space. At the bus stop. At the mall. At a restaurant. At work. Buzzword of the year that everyone loooves loudly throwing around with their friends or over the phone. Feels awesome for me, makes my day so much better/s
I could go on for a long time, but I'm scared no one will read/rb this if it gets too much longer.
So please. Stop using the word "narcissist" as a synonym for "abusive".
Stop bringing up people you hate who you believe to have NPD because of a stigmatizing article full of misinformation whenever someone with actual NPD opens their mouth. (Imagine if people did that with any other disorder! "Hey, I'm autistic." "Oh... my old roommate screamed at me whenever I made noise around him, and didn't understand my needs, which seems like sensory overload and difficulty with social cues. He was definitely autistic. But as long as you're self-aware and always restraining your innate desire to be an abusive asshole, you're okay I guess, maybe." ...See how offensive and ignorant that is?)
Stop preventing healthcare for people with a disorder just because it's trendy to use us as a scapegoat.
If you got this far, thank you for reading, and please share this if you can. Further reading is under the cut.
NPD Criteria, re-written by someone who actually has NPD
Stigma in the DSM
Common perception of the DSM criteria vs how someone may actually experience them (Keep in mind that this is the way I personally experience these symptoms, and that presentation can vary a lot between individuals)
"Idk, the stigma is right though, because I've known a lot of people with NPD who are jerks, so I'm going to continue to support the blockage of treatment for this condition."
(All of these were written by me, because I didn't want to link to other folks' posts without permission, but if you want to add your own links in reblogs or replies please feel free <3)
#actuallynpd#signal boost#actuallyautistic#mental health awareness#narcissistic personality disorder#people also need to realize that mental health professionals aren't immune from bias#(it really shouldn't come as a shock that the mental health field has a longstanding pattern of misunderstanding and mistreating ppl who ar#mentally ill or otherwise ND)#the first therapist i brought up NPD to like. literally pulled out the DSM bc she could barely remember the criteria. then said that there'#no way I have it because I have low self-esteem lmaoooooo#anyway throwback to being at work and chatting with a co-worker. and the conversation turning to mental health. and him saying that#he tries to stay informed and be aware and supportive of mental health conditions & that he doesn't want to be ignorant or spread harmful#misinformation. and then i mentioned that i do a lot of research into mental health stuff and i listed a bunch of things. which included#several personality disorders. one of which was NPD.#and after listening to my whole ass list he zeroed in on the NPD and immediately started talking about how narcissists are abusive and#he knew someone who had NPD and how the person who had it had an addiction and died from the addiction in a horrible way and he#was glad he did#fun times#or when i decided to be vulnerable and talk abt my self-criticism/self-hatred bc i knew my friends also struggled w that and i wanted to#support them by sharing my own coping methods. and they both(separately!) started picking and prodding at my npd through the lens of stigma#bc i'd recently opened up to them abt having it. they recognized self-hatred as a symptom and still jumped on me for it. despite me#trying to share hurt vulnerable parts of myself to help them and connect with them.#again..... fun times
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Thinking about when I checked into crisis and they had me talk to someone there about my current medications (not the psychiatrist or therapist btw they were just taking record of it for when I did talk to them) and she said “you’re like this because you need to just get a job” and when I said I have a disabling chronic illness she just starting making up a bunch of other stuff I “don’t do” to point to, while knowing 0 things about me or my life, and when I told her I either already do those things or physically cannot do them due to the previously mentioned disability, she just got increasingly more frustrated that she couldn’t blame my problems on me being lazy
She heard I was unemployed and made up a guy to get mad at in her head I swear
#venting sry. I was thinking about this today while feeling frustrated about being in a lot of pain#the best part is the mental health problems I was having were in fact directly related to the physical illness problems so.#very cool of her to be like ‘well your problem is you aren’t a functioning member of society’ and doubling down#yeah dude i know. i all reminded that my physical condition makes me be seen as worthless all the time thanks for that#people like you are the reason I have problems with self worth in the first place asshole
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You asked for it. | b.e
warnings: angst kinda?, smut, strap usage (r! receiving), angry sex, orgasm denial, pet names (baby, honey, darling, babydoll), spanking, degrading, hair pulling, !dom billie, !sub reader, toxic and mean billie, reader is desperate and dumb, they basically fuck the problem away, and lastly… THE BELT.
summary: you knew just what u were doing, walking like that, talking like that, looking like that to someone who wasn’t her… but you know, she will make you pay for it.
— 11pm, grammy’s after party. —
You felt her eyes burning on you, at each move you made, smirk you gave, and she clearly wasn’t happy about it.
You thought it would be an great revenge, you were mad at her, she wasn’t being herself lately. The work, the pressure, everything made her forget about you. And it only got worse, you felt invisible, unattractive, worthless.
So you decided to make her pay, but at what cost? well, that didn’t matter anymore. You would do anything to make her look at you, even if she’s burning in jealosy.
“i could take you to my house today… what do you think about that?… hey?..” you just was too focused on looking at billie, desperate for her attention. But suddenly, she gets up, and start walking towards you and… maybe julie? jade? jane? you couldn’t care less about what was the girls name.
“shes with me, come on, we have things to do.” billie spoke, with an cold raspy voice. She couldn’t even look at your eyes, she didn’t even grab your arm, her look on you made you feel gross… but you still knew, she had asked for it.
— 11:45pm, a lot of places actually —
You two entered her dodge challenger, she didn’t open the door for you, it looked almost like she was avoiding to be close to you. You kept your head down the whole drive, and she was quiet, deadly quiet. You couldn’t take anymore.
“don’t act like im the only asshole here.” you said finally looking at her, as she entered the garage. Her gaze was finally on you, her look was angry, sharp, possessive. You didn’t know how to feel about it, you’re glad that she was finally looking at you, but.. you’re still afraid of what she was going to say.
“well, you’re the only whore.” her voice was harsh, you took a deep breath and replied.
“don’t blame me for your incompetence.” you said in the same tone as her, even angrier. She was getting really pissed by this.
“excuse me?! what the fuck you just said?!” she wasn’t believing what she heard.
“its not my fault you didn’t even try to make me cum lately.” you stared deep at her eyes, as you saw the look of confusion? angriness? you couldn’t tell anymore.
“you fucking asked for it.” she got off the drivers seat, opening your door and dragging you inside by the arm. She was pissed, but still being careful to not to hurt you in anyway.
You couldn’t tell when you had took all of your clothes off, you just remember being pressed against the kitchen counter with billie tearing apart your fancy dress that she bought you. She made you turn your back to her, as you felt the pressure of her strap on your ass.
“why did you had to be so bratty today, baby? i know you can feel it… i was going to give you what you want, even more…” she spoke on your ear, as she continues to tear apart your dress.
“please.” that whine just escaped out of your dirty mind.. as you felt her hands grabbing your hips harshly, making you arch your back with the light pain.
“now you are begging huh? aren’t you the little slut who was flirting with some weirdo in front of me?” she spoke as you kept quiet, her grip on your hips was getting really harsh.
“bend over.” she said making you bend over the kitchen counter, as she took off her new belt from her hit me hard and soft merch… you could see her adjusting the belt on her hand, as you were with your full body exposed to her. You felt one, two, three smacks on your ass… still holding back every single moan.
“do you think that she could fuck you like me? huh? do you really thing she could treat you like the dirty slut you are?” you just shut your eyes and tried to make your mouth as closed as possible, and she didn’t liked that. She grabbed a fist of your hair, smacking your ass with the belt even harder as she pulled your head back.
“answer me.” she said with an low and raspy voice that made you shiver, since you were in this position, you couldn’t hold back anymore… you just let out an moan when she smacked your ass.
“mhm… n-no, no one can… please bills.” you said as she put your head down again, as she continues to smack your ass, harder and harder until she was done spaking you. It hurt, but it hurt so fucking good. She carried you in her arms to your room, placing you carefully on the bed.
“im gonna give you what you want now, darling.. face down, ass up.” she spoke in a demanding way, you did what she asked you to, she just pushed your underwear to the side to reveal that sticky wetness.
“i think you like being spanked a little…” she spoke, pausing to press her thumb against your clit as she smirked “…too much.”
“y-you’re fucking mean bill-..” you were harshly interruped with another slap on your alrealy bruised area, making you moan again.
“i don’t remember allowing you to speak, honey.” she said as her pace on your clit got faster, but she suddenly stopped.. as she unzipped her jeans.
She placed the strap on your entrance lubricating itself with your own liquids. She got in slowly to make you get used to it, but it was too big to be that easy. You grabbed the bed sheets almost as if your life depends on it.
“its only half way in, babydoll.. sure you can take all of it?” she said getting worried with you.
“yes.. i can.. please fill me up.” that was the only thing she wanted to hear, when you realized, she was already fucking your brains out.
She was pounding you harshly, you could swear that the whole fucking world could hear how loud you were moaning, but you couldn’t help it. Billie was pulling your hair as she hit your g spot, again, and again, and again… She had skilled fingers, and you knew that better than anyone. Without a warning, she begin to play with your clit like it was a fucking toy while she was making a mess out of your poor cunt.
“im c-close.” you said as you holded into the bed sheets once again, feeling your orgarsm coming… but she stopped touching you, she pulled out her strap as you whimpered.
“do you think you really deserve to come after all you did? come on.” she smirked, as you were compleatly at her mercy
“you asked for it.”
— GUYSS, thats my first oneshot here… english its not my mother language and im sorry if theres some grammar or spelling mistakes in this, hope you guys liked itt… horny freaks.
#billie eilish smut#smut#billie eilish#billie elish icons#billie ellish lyrics#billie eilish x reader#billie eilish oneshot#billie eilish blurb#billie eilish fic#oneshot#wlw#strappon#billie eilish concert#billie eilish fanfiction#billie eilish fanart
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Yandere BTS OT7 - Mistake
DISCLAIMER: This is a FICTION work only made for entertainment purposes that includes yandere/dark. I do not support or encourage any type of abusive behaviour.
SUMMARY: You make a big mistake and now you deal with the consequences.
Check more: Masterlist.
OT7 x Female reader
WARNINGS: Implied Kidnapping.
AN: I really made Jimin the bad guy here, but I hope you guys like it 💖
--
You hold your breath for a solid minute, staring at the door as it shakes.
The banging on the door progressively gets more violent as the loud commotion outside of the bathroom you just locked yourself in increases.
The realization of what you did slowly starts to hit you.
But you know very clearly how badly you’ve messed up.
“Y/n! Open this door right now!” Hoseok and Jimin yell, angry voices mixing in.
“Open it right fucking now!”
“Don’t you dare ignore us!”
You wince as a hard punch is thrown at the poor door, silently thanking the strong wood for withstanding the boys’s wrath.
It’s the only thing keeping you safe from a horrible punishment, although you’re not stupid enough to think you can spend the rest of your life hidden in the bathroom.
“What is going on here?” a new voice joins, overlapping over the rest of the angry voices, and you guess it’s Namjoon from the deep timbre.
“Look at this, hyung! Y/n tried pushing Jimin down the stairs and now she’s locked herself in the bathroom.”
You can practically see Namjoon’s brows rising in disbelief.
The handle moves and upon realizing that the door is indeed locked shut, there’s a new knock on the door, although this one is much softer than the previous ones.
“Y/n? Is this true?” he questions you, voice laced with disappointment. “Did you try to hurt Jimin?”
Hot tears prickle your eyes as the struggle to hold them back proves itself to be worthless.
They’re gonna get so mad at you. They’re gonna hurt you.
“N-No.”
“Liar!” Jimin cuts you off, and you jump at an unexpected fierce bang to the door. “I was trying to be nice and you fucking pushed me away!”
His explanation is twisted and it awakens flames of annoyance inside you.
Jimin is not someone you would rank highly when it came to the boys, despite having no clear favorites amongst them.
You hate them all.
They’re all kidnappers, for all you care. But Jimin is particularly pushy when it comes to you and you hate him dearly for that.
“You’re the liar!” you scream back, still maintaining a safe distance from the door. “You…Why don’t you tell the truth, you asshole?”
You don’t wait for him to reply before continuing.
“Namjoon, he tried slipping his hands underneath my shirt.” you sniff, cringing at the fresh memory of Jimin’s cold hands sneaking around your belly, starved to touch any inch of your skin. “He touched me, so I pushed him. He- I didn’t realize the stairs were so close, okay?”
There’s a moment of silence.
“Jimin-ah, why would you do that?”
The muffled question from Jin has a light spark of hope igniting in you. Jin is one of the nicest, he’ll surely understand your situation.
“I didn’t grope her! It was barely a touch!”
“Jimin…” Namjoon sighs, clearly having doubts over the younger boy’s dubious explanation.
“Hyung, I’m telling the truth! Y/n is the one lying!” Jimin argued back, his heated temper making his voice rise. “She’s just making excuses for the fact that she tried hurting me. She’s the one who went crazy on me and tried to shove me down the stairs.”
“I didn’t-”
“She was probably hoping that I’d break my neck or something.” The malicious tone that Jimin uses upsets you.
“I already said it was an accident!” you try to defend yourself.
“It didn’t look much like an accident.” Yoongi contradicts you.
“Yeah, it really didn’t.” You shake your head at Jungkook’s words, feeling yourself getting slightly hysterical.
You want to scream and shout. Of course they’re gonna take Jimin’s side.
“It was an accident!” your voice is considerably aggravated, and it shows. “I didn’t mean to!”
“Then come out.” Jimin challenges you. “What are you hiding for, if it was an accident?”
You ignore him.
The boys argue back and forth, with Jimin vehemently insisting it's all your fault against Jin and Taehyung, who try their best to minimize your actions.
Finally, when the argument threatens to escalate into a fight, Namjoon intervenes.
“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves, guys. There’s no point in fighting like this. Let’s solve the situation like adults.”
There’s a softer knock on the door.
“Y/n? Can you please come out?”
You don’t even think before throwing a loud no.
“Sweetheart, please, we’re not gonna hurt you.” Jin tries.
“Speak for yourself.” Jimin’s voice isn’t low enough to go unheard, and the hair on your arms rises at the implicit threat.
“Jimin!” several boys hiss.
“Baby, please, just come out!” Taehyung begs. "We can talk things out."
“Y/n, we just want to clear up the situation, okay?” Namjoon tries again, using a pacific tone. “No one is punishing you without having the whole story, I promise.”
You shake your head, heart pounding in your ears as you walk further away from the door. You don’t believe him.
In the end, they’ll hurt you. You know that.
Curling yourself into the small space next to the bathtub, you bury your face in your arms.
Any previous anger and energy you had is now fully drained, the seriousness of your situation making you dwell into a light depression.
You’re tired. So fucking tired of them.
They’ve turned you into a captive, took away all of your life choices, stripped you away from your freedom. All for a poor excuse of love, as they claimed it.
Obsessed freaks, that’s what they truly are.
You cover your ears with your hands, blocking away their circus of begging, threatening and bribing.
You’re not opening the door.
It takes less than an hour for them to finally get inside the bathroom.
By then, you’re slightly more anxious, having cried all the tears you had and yet new ones are ready to spill when Jungkook and Jin’s combined strength finally breaks the door down.
As already expected, Jimin is the first one to stride in, closely followed by the rest of the boys.
But what scares you the most is the terrifyingly sly smirk that he dedicates you as he bends down. One of his hands grips your hair, aggressively pulling your head back as he leans down to whisper on your ear.
“I don’t care what Namjoon hyung said before.” he says, “But you’re getting punished. We’ll see if you can even walk after what I’m about to do to you.”
#@yankpop#yandere kpop#yandere bts#yandere bts x reader#bts ot7 x reader#yandere bts ot7#bts x reader#yandere suga#yandere yoongi#yandere yoongi x reader#yandere jin#yandere jin x reader#yandere jhope#yandere hoseok#yandere hoseok x reader#yandere namjoon#yandere namjoon x reader#yandere jimin#yandere jimin x reader#yandere taehyung#yandere taehyung x reader#yandere jungkook#yandere jungkook x reader#tw: yandere#tw: kidnapping#yandere drabble#yandere x reader#yandere x y/n
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PETPLAY
(Yoon Seeun x M! Reader, Anal, Rope Play, small tits, creampie, Painal, PetPlay, Petgirl)
Note: thanks to @smutoperator to teach me how to make good smut :D
Nestled in the heart of a picturesque neighborhood, my home stands as a testament to elegance and comfort. Its grandeur is evident from the moment you lay eyes on its stately facade, with large windows that allow sunlight to flood the spacious interiors. The rooms are adorned with tasteful decor, and every corner exudes a sense of warmth and welcome. Amidst this beauty, there is a special companion who makes this house truly feel like home. Seeun, my beloved petgirl, brings an extra layer of joy and liveliness to our abode. Whether frolicking in the garden or curling up by the fireplace, Seeun's presence is a constant reminder of the love and happiness that fills our grand, beautiful home.
She is already on her knees when i get closer to her, I ask her "Who's your name" and she answered it "Seeun, Master". I slap her cheek and I said "Answer correctly, Slut" and she cry a little and answer correctly "I am nothing, I'm not have a name, I'm only your slut, your pet, master"
And I grabbed her body and took her to the bed, lying on her back as I tied her hands, already getting her naked, I spit on her pretty slutty face and squeeze her small tits, I pinched and slapped her pussy, she cried and moaned a loud, she is crying and moan a loud "FUUCCKKK MASTER" she is moan a loud "Who's your owner, Dog" I slap her face and spit on her face again "Master, my master own this worthless dog"
I start to untie her hands and make her bend over my bed, i spank her big ass ""FUUCKK MASTER don't stop hurting me" i slap her big ass again, start to unzip my pants and slap my cock on her ass cheek and start to thrust her anallu, and pound her asshole so hard until she cry a lot but she can do nothing, i own her already, i still pounding her ass so hard and start to pulling her hair "IT HURT SO DAMN MUCH" and her tits bouncy a lot
I put off my cock from her ass and thrust my cock into her tight pink pussy since i use her one half year ago, we already have one baby from seeun's womb but i can't stop use her, i pounding her wet pussy so hard and pull her hair, she just moan loudly "FUCK IT'S SO NICE AAHHHH" and i still fuck her pussy really hard, i start to pull her hands behind her back and tied them with a rope.
She can't do anything, I said "Who's own you, dog?" And she said "Master, my master bark bark" she is barking makes me hornier, i pound her pussy harder and start to cum a lot in her pussy, ready to get her pregnant again" put a blindfold and leave her while she's still on my bed.
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things i think about:
what if mobei jun has a type? what if he doesnt bow fealty to luo binghe because he's impressed by strength or beaten into submission or whatever. what if he noticed what an absolutely pathetic lil crybaby worm luo binghe can be and he's just Weak for a certain type of person okay
luo binghe crying in the endless abyss before he darkens and mobei jun just like "play it cool, no need to be nice, but ohno he's so pathetic, and ohno im attached"
and i fully mean this for pidw mobei jun as well LOL. you cannot convince me that bing-ge isn't also just as pathetic as bing-mei, he's just doing a better job of hiding it pffff
anyway, mobei jun just absolutely Torn Asunder by these pathetic two-faced men. he can't help it, they look so worthless and they're also such vindictive assholes and mobei jun has a Type
anyway onto the moshang of it all but like, what if shang qinghua catches onto the fact that mobei jun actually had a bit of a Thing for luo binghe (past tense) and he's like "oh fucking goddammit, well, this is inconvenient for everyone, but what my babygirl wants, my babygirl gets" and he proceeds to make various attempts to cause a bingqiu divorce, or at very least open up their marriage, because "if my king wants bing-mei, my king is gonna GET bing-mei! i dont owe cucumber-bro shit"
only, to mobei jun, shang qinghua's attempts to divorce bingqiu is making him think that shang qinghua has feelings for them and now he's Very Upset because look, he had a crush on luo binghe, but shang qinghua is endgame for him and now qinghua wants to be with someone else????
misunderstandings abound lmfao also shen yuan might beat the shit out of shang qinghua when he learns about his evil machinations lololol "IM IN A VERY HAPPY MONOGAMOUS MARRIAGE YOU ASSHOLE"
shang qinghua, lowkey after he fails to get bing-mei for mobei jun he's just like "i mean... cucumber bro mentioned something about the multiverse 🤔 maybe i can get my babygirl to bing-ge?"
mobei jun: ....please stop
(ofc shang qinghua is highkey heartbroken the whole way BUT HE IS DETERMINED OKAY, HE WILL SEE THIS THROUGH)
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𝐚 𝐥𝐚𝐩𝐬𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐟𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 | 𝐦𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐞𝐥 𝐨’𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚
you get embarrassed and miguel won’t let it go —featuring a smug miguel and a pining spider-girl. pre across the spider-verse but contains spoilers. requested here. fem!reader
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
"This is super, uber bad," Lyla drawls lightly.
Miguel waves an annoyed hand at her, gaze on the orange monitor in front of him. You shift from foot to foot beside him, neck craned to watch in tandem.
"Like, so bad. Maybe you should go help."
"I can't intervene now," Miguel says.
"How come?" you ask, pulling at the tips of your gloves one at a time as you worry, until the whole thing is slipping off and onto the floor.
You make no move to pick it up. Miguel glances down at it, then the screen again before saying, "Because they'll never learn. And because there's too many fingers in the same pie."
"Pie?" you ask.
"You don't want that?" he asks, pointing at your fallen glove.
You blink, pulled back to the present from your stewing anxiety. It's hard seeing people you care about getting their asses handed to them and knowing you can't help.
Miguel rolls his eyes, only half-making fun as he leans down for your glove. You lean at the same time, almost knocking your head into his as your fingers brush. Miguel looks up, suddenly face to face with you. Your breath catches in your throat at the proximity. You can see every dark lash hedging his eyes, feel the fanning of his exhale as it kisses your top lip.
His confusion is obvious. "What? Why are you looking at me like that?”
"Uh– it’s nothing."
His eyes narrow, your heart skips a beat, and while Miguel might not have a spider sense he's still enhanced. He must hear it. Something in his eyes changes, the smallest flicker of amusement relaxing his brow.
You wince and stand up rigidly straight, face to the screen again so he can't see your flustered expression head on. "Nothing."
"Sort of felt like something."
"It's nothing, Miguel."
"That why you forgot this?"
You look down at his offered hand, your glove bunched up in his big palm.
Your lips part of their own accord, any effort you've made to appear unaffected by him, his stature, and his general imposing demeanour now worthless. Too quickly, you snatch the glove from his hand and yank it back over your fingers, your pinky bending uncomfortably from the sheer force of it.
"It's nothing," Miguel repeats without inflection, though he crosses his arms and chuckles a second later.
You squirm beside him. "I– I'm distracted."
"I can tell. Something caught your eye?"
The urge to cover your face with both hands reaches an all time high. You settle for covering one flushed cheek. "Nothing interesting."
"No? Well, we can change that."
"Would you stop?" you ask, trying to sound furious but definitely bordering pleading.
"I'm not doing anything. Nothing happened."
"I wouldn't take that, if it were me," Lyla chimes in.
"Good thing it's not you," Miguel says.
Things are quiet for a while. Miguel refocuses on the fight unfolding on screen, and you try to calm your beating heart. The embarrassment refuses to wane, your pulse too stubborn to slow, and eventually Miguel must take pity on you, leaning toward you with arms crossed over his chest. "It wasn't that bad," he says.
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"I'm trying to make you feel better."
"You– I– you were so close to me, I got nervous, it– it has nothing to do with you."
Miguel raises his eyebrows. "Oh, okay." He straightens up. "Nothing to do with me. You know I can hear your heart, right?"
"Wow. Is that unique to you?" you ask scathingly, knowing every Spider in the whole headquarters can likely hear the drum of your heart right now.
You know he's teasing because he finally managed to catch you in a moment of awkwardness rather than the other way around, and because he's an asshole —you think that part hard, hoping his enhanced hearing has improved to include telepathy. Like he can tell, he grins, and he nods at nothing in particular.
"Don't worry, Spider-Girl. I won't hold it against you."
"Generous," you say.
His voice drops to a rough, lilting murmur, "People have said that about me. Tall, handsome, generous." It's impossible to miss the implication.
Your heart rockets and you have to turn away from him entirely to maintain any dignity you have left.
"You know what else they say?" Lyla asks. "That he's a smug, tightly wound control freak who's too busy being a bad sport, totally missing Jess' call for backup."
"What?" Miguel asks, all smoothness dropped from his voice. "Respond!"
"Say sorry to Y/N."
"Lyla!"
"Say sorry–"
"I'm sorry," he says to you. You're happy to find genuine apology in his gaze, if only for a second. "Lyla, respond."
"Already did."
Miguel gets so immediately angry that his head tips back and his eyes screw closed, grunting his dissatisfaction. You send Lyla a grateful smile, smothering a wave of laughs with your gloved hand.
"Don't worry, Miguel," you say cheerfully. "I won't hold it against you."
"...Thank you."
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
thanks for reading! i hope u enjoyed, pls reblog if u have the time! <;3 my other miguel fics
#miguel and spidergirl reader#miguel o’hara x reader#miguel o’hara x you#miguel o’hara x y/n#miguel o’hara x fem!reader#miguel o’hara#miguel o’hara fanfiction#miguel o’hara fanfic#miguel o’hara fic#miguel o’hara drabble#miguel o’hara scenario#miguel o’hara blurb#miguel o’hara oneshot#spider-man: across the spider-verse#spider-man: across the spider-verse spoilers#spider-man: across the spider-verse fanfiction#across the spider-verse spoilers#across the spider verse spoilers#across the spiderverse spoilers#spiderman across the spider-verse spoilers#miguel ohara x reader#miguel ohara x you#miguel ohara x y/n#miguel ohara x fem!reader#miguel ohara#miguel ohara fanfiction#miguel ohara fanfic#miguel ohara fic#miguel ohara drabble#miguel ohara scenario
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in what way, if any, do you think that indulging kinks is different than making jokes as far as emplanting/reinforcing ideas in the mind? do you think that being a sexual sadist makes you more permissive of nonconsensual violence?genuine question, feel free to ignore or answer privately if this is too thorny.
OKAY I have tried to write this 4 times now here we go!!!! This time it will NOT get deleted!!!!!!!!
This is a really good + important question so I am glad you asked! To me, it comes down to context and critical self-reflection.
Kink, done properly, occurs in a very specific and frank context. You discuss what a scene will look like beforehand, and then you discuss what happened and each person's experiences afterward. Proper kink requires blatant discussions of what is wanted and what is to be avoided, and the consent of all parties is what helps create this context.
Humor, on the other hand, tends to live in a hazy grey area between truth and lies. We like to think that because jokes are jokes, this means they are completely detached from our world. But humor has a social function. It helps bring people together, as well as delineate divisions. And it also helps us dip a toe into a certain feeling without having to discuss the feeling itself.
To give an example, let's talk about bees and wasps.
Say there is a person named A. A generally thinks of themself as liking animals and the natural world. They are against climate change and pro-biodiversity, although they don't really know a ton about these topics. They see people making jokes about wasps vs. bees: bees are sweet pollinators just trying to enjoy the summer, while wasps are angry assholes who will fuck your wife. A finds these jokes funny, especially having learned about how important bees are but having always been afraid of wasps. A also begins making jokes about how wasps have no purpose, they just exist to ruin your day, and should be killed. A finds themself joking about how we should really just kill off all wasps, since they are evil and worthless creatures. When A sees a wasp, they feel nothing but fear and the desire to kill it painfully. If they hear about something is causing mass death amongst wasps, they think its probably a net positive for everyone.
A was clearly biased against wasps from the beginning, which isn't really their fault; wasps can be scary and hurtful! The jokes seem to reaffirm their feelings as natural, socially valid, and even funny. But as I'm sure many of my followers know, wasps ARE pollinators and are quite important to the environment, as well as having the inherent worth that all creatures do. It's rather contradictory for A to both say they value biodiversity, while also devaluing an entire group of creatures and being okay with, or even advocating for, their extinction.
It is fully possible for A to dislike wasps, AND value biodiversity. The problem is that A does not really know how to apply their values to the world and their actions. They generally have beliefs, but those beliefs do not form a bedrock they can reference. Their values and their actions are not in conversation.
To take it back to what you were discussing: properly done kink always involves conversation between values and actions. The values are consent, risk-aware safety, and mutual pleasure/satisfaction/positive experiences. Knowing these values and what they mean, the people involved can talk about what they want to do and how those actions will relate to those values. When a sadist is hitting someone in a scene, they know that this is happening because they have created a context in which that action aligns with their values. And if someone does find that they are being shaped negatively by kink experiences, they can recognize that and choose to stop.
I believe there is a problem with people not truly knowing what they believe or value, and/or not truly knowing how their beliefs/values interact with the world and their actions. And when you combine that with the ambiguity of jokes, the way we are encouraged to see jokes as something separated from the "real world," and the way they can encourage people to follow their gut feelings and reaffirm them as socially valid and true, you get. well. bad times! radicalization! Oops All Assholes!
I just made a post that was kind of an example of this. I watched Megan Thee Stallion's documentary and joked about how she should be allowed to kill indiscriminately. When I think about making those kinds of jokes, I am keeping in mind:
Killing individuals doesn't solve systemic issues
I value transformative justice over punitive justice
I generally avoid making these- humourously communicating my anger at injustice into calls for violence- because I am conscious that jokes aren't "just jokes." This doesn't mean I NEVER do it. It's not, like, radioactive. Making a joke won't corrupt me a la the One Ring. But I make a choice to steer myself away from that kind of humor. Because I don't want to create that kind of thought pattern; because I am being conscious of the distinction between feeling and value, of catharsis and justice; because I don't want to connect with others on the basis of a belief I don't actually hold and am just putting on to express frustration; and because, in the case of other jokes, regardless of their impact on ME, they can still hurt other people. Even if you feel like you can make small dick jokes and still genuinely believe body-shaming is bad… if your jokes still have the impact of body-shaming people, then your values aren't really having an impact on your actions, at which point they are meaningless.
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Insanity
Chapter 2 : Torture Avails
Featuring : The Salesman x F!Reader.
TW : ATTEMPTED SEXUAL ASSAULT, HARASSMENT (Not by the Salesman), CRUDE REMARKS, BAD LANGUAGE, EXPLETIVES, MENTIONS OF TORTURE, THE SALESMAN COMES WITH HIS OWN WARNINGS, DARK THEMES.
Do not read if you feel uncomfortable with the above terms given.
The characters do not belong to me except the reader. This is an original plot idea do not steal or modify the scenario created down below.
Summary : After putting you to sleep, he stealthily made his way to the bastard of a boss to pay him a sweet visit.
Masterlist.
Previous >> Chapter 1 : The Snapped Thread.
After making sure you were asleep wrapped up like a comfy burrito and giving you a sweet fond kiss on your temple. He sets out to the company you worked at and eerily enters like he owned the company and looked up to see the the topmost floor still lit up at 2:00 a.m. and enters the elevator as as the door was about to close he gave feral grin before the elevator doors closed fully.
As you slept, curled up in the safety of your home, the Salesman’s mind raced. The sight of your distress had awakened something dark and primal inside him, something that couldn't be soothed by words alone. The idea that anyone—especially someone in a position of power—had made you feel small, worthless, had pushed him past the point of reason.
The elevator doors opened with a ding and he walked like a cat, silently and stealthily as he made his way to your boss's office. He had spent years working in the shadows, navigating the dangerous and deadly games of life, but tonight, he wasn’t going to be playing games. Tonight, he was a man on a mission.
Inside the cabin the boss, Mr. Park ever being the perverted man was watching pornography in the vicinity of his office with blinds closed and tie loose.
How unprofessional...
Reaching your boss’s cabin, he didn’t hesitate. He walked right in, his expression eerily calm, his voice low and menacing. “You’ve caused my jagiya pain. And now you’ll pay for it."
He quietly closed the door and locked it and creeped towards the man who was now shaking in his boots his eyes widening in fear. But before he could speak, the Salesman was already on him, grabbing him by the collar and lifting him off his chair with terrifying ease.
“You think you can treat my jagiya like that huh and now I'll do the exact things you did to her asshole.."
The Salesman’s voice was laced with a eerie calmness but feral eyes laced with calculated rage.
The room was silent except for the sound of your boss’s frantic breaths. He tried to beg, to plead, but the Salesman wasn’t listening. With a quick, brutal movement, he threw him into the chair, his eyes locking onto the trembling figure before him.
"You think she doesn’t matter? That her pain doesn’t mean anything?” The Salesman’s voice was barely a whisper now, but the intensity behind it made it feel like a roar. “I will make you understand. I’ll make you feel every ounce of the fear she felt today. Every ounce of her suffering."
He pulled a butterfly knife from beneath his suit blazer, the cold metal gleaming under the fluorescent lights. The knife was a symbol, not just of death, but of power—the power to take control of a situation, to bring someone to their knees. The tip pressed against your boss’s throat as he froze in fear.
“Do you know what it feels like to be powerless?” the Salesman whispered madly calm. "To feel like your whole world is against you, like you’re nothing? Let me show you."
He made a tiny but devastating slit on his throat causing him to gurgle and choke on his own blood , but the threat was enough. Your boss shook uncontrollably, sweat dripping down his face. The Salesman could see the fear, the desperation. He could feel the energy shift, the man who had once held all the power now reduced to a quivering shell.
Gore Warning
After what felt like an eternity, the Salesman made another move, but this time he gouged his eyes out, the ones that leered at you perversely. His gaze never left your boss, as he did the grotesque job.
With that, he turned and walked out, leaving your boss a broken man, both physically and emotionally shattered now that he had no eyes, nor hands and a cut tounge and lastly a chopped off the penis lay on the floor like a limp sausage, as his corpse lay on the lavish office chair. He had picked the wrong woman to mess with and now he had paid with his life.
Before going out completely he deleted teh footage if the camera and leaving behind the pathetic bastard's corpse to rot.
back at your apartment, the Salesman returned quietly, slipping back into the room where you lay asleep. His expression was unreadable, but there was a dark satisfaction in his eyes, knowing that no one would dare harm you again. He crawled back into bed beside you, pulling you close without a word, as if shielding you from the world’s cruelty with his very presence.
You slept peacefully, unaware of the violence that had unfolded in your absence, while he watched over you, the weight of his actions never settling in his chest along with the blood specks on his pristine white collar. He had protected you in the only way he knew how. And he would do it again, if necessary.
For you.... Only for you...
#fem reader#salesman squid game#squid game season 2#squid game x reader#squid game#gong yoo x reader#squid game 2#gong yoo#dark#tw blood#tw death#the salesman x reader
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