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#this also goes to the people that dm me and are like
sturniqlo · 23 hours
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Pretty Girl- M.S
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summary: where matt slides into singer!y/ns dms not knowing she would respond back, and it leads into something more.
cw: cursing, FLUFF; sweet messages, first meeting, honeymoon stage, kissing, ANGST(very little); second thoughts on relationship(?), past relationship issues, insecurity of not being good enough, social media hate
an: i just love fics where reader is a famous singer :) | very fast paced timeline | as usual, not proofread
masterlist | join my taglist
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"said you're not in my time zone, but you wanna be."- bed chem, s.c
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matthew.sturniolo 12:47am
hi, you're like really pretty :)
Matt exits out of the dm and scrolls on tiktok for the remainder of the night. He shuts off his phone completely forgetting about the message he had sent to Y/n. There was no way she would respond. Y/n was a famous singer with millions of more followers than him. He had been following her for sometime now, as he had discovered a song- many songs- he really likes from her. Matt also saw his big of a fan Nick was, which introduced him to his favorite songs.
Y/n was currently in New York finding some inspiration from her upcoming album. Usually she resides in LA but she loves being in New York while she writes. It's more homey to her, it was fall after all, her favorite season, the leaves were turning orange and falling off of their branches, landing on sidewalks all over the city, the weather was chillier, she loved it. Back in LA it was many degrees hotter, she couldn't wear her cute cardigans without sweating.
The next morning, Matt woke up to a loud commotion coming from the kitchen which was very close to his room. Groggily he came out of his room and saw his brothers arguing. "I hid the last bagel for a reason because I was going to fucking eat it this morning." Nick angrily crumples up the empty bag the bagel was in. "How was I supposed to know?" Chris argues back, taking a bite of the bagel.
"Do you guys mind? I was sleeping peacefully and I got woken up to you two arguing over a fucking bagel." Matt scoffs. He goes back into his room and shuts the door. He rolls his eyes and walks over to his bed where his phone is laying. As it turns on, he sees a instagram notification. Unlocking it with his face id, he sees Y/n replied to his message. "Holy-" He cuts himself off.
y/n/y/l/n 2:47pm
thank you! you're cute yourself ;)
sorry for the late response it was 3 am when you dmed me haha!
Matt stared at the message opened message with his mouth slightly open. you're cute yourself? He was about to faint. His thumbs hovered over the keyboard thinking about what he was going to say next.
matthew.sturniolo 11:49am
holy shit you actually responded... also thank you :))
sounds like you're three hours ahead of me??
y/n/y/l/n 2:50pm
hahaha
i believe so. i'm currently in new york, i'm assuming you're in the west coast? la possibly?
She responded quickly and Matt's heartbeat only got quicker.
Y/n had spent her morning bright and early. She woke up at around seven am and did her morning which consisted of her morning shower, skincare routine. She ate a bowl of strawberries and blueberries while she answered some emails. About an hour after sending emails and responding to important messages she went out for breakfast.
At her favorite cafe, she ordered her usual bagel and iced coffee and sat down by the window. She ate her breakfast and stared out the window watching people walk by going about their morning. A few fans spotted her as she was leaving so she took some pictures with them. "Excuse me, Y/n?" A soft shy voice said as she exited the bagel shop. She looked back and saw two teenage girls nervously smiling.
"Hey, guys!" She gasped, letting her wired headphones hang. "Hi, we- we uh. Sorry I'm so nervous." Y/n smiled. "Don't be nervous. I promise you it's okay." She giggled and walked closed to them. "Okay, thank you." The one girl sighed in relief. The three of them made a ten minute long conversation. "We're so sorry for taking your time!" One of them gasps realizing how long they've been talking for. "Don't worry about it, it's okay."
Y/n returned to her apartment at around twelve and cleaned up a bit. She'd been in New York for about two weeks now. She took a quick shower and chilled on her phone for a bit. Here and there she liked to go through her instagram dms and respond to some fans. As she was scrolling through, she saw that Matt has dmed her. Y/n has known about the triplets for sometime now, she has watched a couple of their youtube video. And to be honest, Matt had caught her eye those couple of times.
She blushed, she opened the dm and read the message fully. It was sent about eleven hours ago. She responded anyways and she was bold enough to send a second message. Exiting out quickly and scrolled and responded back to some fans who just wanted to say hi or wanted some advice.
Two minutes later, a notification from Matt appeared at the top of her screen. She smiled and opened it right away responding quickly, Matt responded seconds later.
matthew.sturniolo
i am
also, new york? i bet it's beautiful out there now that it's fall time
y/n/y/l/n
it's really is! have you ever been out here?
matthew.sturniolo
yeah, a couple of times actually!
are you there permanently?
y/n/y/l/n
nope, just here to get some writing done :))
matthew.sturniolo
new music im assuming?
y/n/y/l/n
can't say tooo much but yess
Over the few weeks, the two messaged each other everyday and eventually exchanged numbers. As much as Matt wanted to tell his brothers. He wanted to keep his 'relationship' with her hidden for a while and be in this little bubble. Matt really enjoyed messaging her and talking with her on the phone that he asked her if she would be up to the idea of talking romantically and see where it would lead them to. Obviously she said yes.
Y/n had never felt like this, Matt was amazing to say the least and she hasn't even met him. Every morning when she would wake up, a good morning message from Matt would be waiting for her. He'd send her little messages throughout the day when he wasn't filming and he calls her when he knows she's about to go to bed. Yeah, she's had her boyfriends here and there but they were nothing like Matt.
Her past relationships were so public from the beginning to the end they almost felt forced. Anytime they would go out there was always a new article and new pictures about it. There were rumors, allegations, and opinions. And she never dated the best people.
matt
hi pretty girl :)
y/n
hi pretty boyyy
matt
are you busy?
y/n
for you? neverrr
matt
okay, i'm calling you now!
Before Y/n could even type out a response her phone rang in her hands with Matt's contact filling her screen. She immediately answered. "Hi Matt." She put him on speaker. "Hi, pretty lady. How's the writing going?" He asks her. "It's.. going. I can't really think of anything right now, so I'm taking a break." Y/n brings her knees up to her chest and scoots her writing book away from her.
"Anyways, what have you been up to?" She says, pressing the facetime button. He answers it right away. "Nothing much, me and my brothers just finished filming a video." He brings his face into view. "Sounds fun, what'd you guys film?" She smiles. "Just a car video talking about random things."
They talked more for some time until someone interrupted Matt's rant by barging into his room. "And then- do you not know how to knock?" He scolded whoever came in. "Who are you talking to?" She heard Nicks voice. "Don't worry about it, what do you want." Matt huffs. Y/n noticed how he tilts his phone away from Nicks view. "Can you take me to-" Matt cuts him off.
"Yeah, yeah, I'll take you. Shoo now." He motions his hand for Nick to leave so he can keep talking to Y/n. A small giggle leaves Y/n and Matt looks at her through the phone and she gasps. Nick must've heard her because he also gasps. "Matt! Are you talking to a girl?" His phone is suddenly snatched from his grip.
Nick looks at the screen and Y/n is with wide eyes and a slight open mouth due to her being shocked of what's happening. Y/n knew that Matt wanted to keep this to himself, as well as her. "Oh.. my god." Nick said and quickly gave the phone back to Matt when he saw who it was. Y/n heard Matt's door close and started laughing, so did Matt. "Holy fuck."
"I'm going to let you go, I need to deal with Nick. I'll call you later." He smiled and waved at her. "Okay, let me know how it goes." She waved back.
"Nick?" Matt walks out of his room. "You, as in Matthew Sturniolo, my triplet brother, are talking to the Y/n. As in the famous singer. Fucking Grammy award winning Y/n!" Nick yelled with his eyes wide open. Y/n was probably- no, is- Nicks favorite artist. He couldn't belive it. "Yes, Nick. Is that so hard to believe?" Matt giggles. "Motherfucker yes! How did you of all people bag her?!" "I'm offended?" Matt furrowed his eyebrows.
Matt goes to tell Nick how everything had happened. "Oh my god, I can't believe this!" Nick yelled into his hands. "What's going on?" Chris comes up his set of stairs. "You'll never believe it!" Nick says. Matt- actually Nick- catches Chris up with everything he missed. "Matt, I've never realized how much game you have."
After everyone - Nick- calmed down, they decided to sit and watch a show.
y/n
i'm assuming everything went well?
matt
yes, nick had a moment of starstruckness i guess, but it went well in general
y/n
omgg, he is so me
will he be okay with me following him?"
matt
pls do, i would kill to see his reaction
y/n
okok
Y/n giggled as she went to her instagram and searched up Nicks username and followed him. Across the country, Matt was secretly recording Nick who was unintentionally scrolling on instagram. "No fucking way! She- she just followed me." Nick flipped his phone to Matt. "She just followed me too!" Chris jumped up from his spot on the couch.
matt
*video attachment*
chris was a plus
y/n
hahaha
one month later
"Alright, we have this shirt with these jeans or," Y/n holds up a potential outfit and shows Matt over facetime. "Ok, I like that one." He nods. "There's also this dress." She holds up the material. "That's the one. I like that one." Matt points and she giggles. "Okay." She leaves the frame and comes back in once she's changed into her outfit.
"It's four over in LA right? I still get a bit confused over timezones." She says as she applies her eyeliner. "Yeah, and it's seven for you, correct?" Matt watches intently as she does he makeup. "Mhm, I have to leave in like forty minutes." Tonight she was going to an album release party for her friend, Conan.
"I would love to be in your timezone. Makes it easier to talk to you." Y/n smiles at an idea that popped up in her head. "Would you -I don't know- maybe want to fly out here? I- you don't have to, but it's just an idea." She rambles a bit. "I'd love to actually. But, I'd have to talk to my brothers first, not that I need their approval or anything, just I'm not sure if they'd want to come." He says.
"You could bring them too. It'd be fun either way." She says. As much as Matt loves traveling with his brothers, he'd appreciate it if this trip was just about the two of them. It's be their first meeting after all. "I hope this plans out well, I really want to meet you, officially."
"I'm tryin' to go to New York." Matt blurts out randomly. He had finished his call with Y/n about two hours ago and all he thought about was possibly getting to meet Y/n and spend sometime with her. "Matt flying across the country for a girl? Who would've thought." Chris says. "Shut up." Matt rolls his eyes. "Do you guys want to go? Or?" He says.
Both Nick and Chris looks at each other and shake their head. As much as Nick wanted to go and possibly meet Y/n, he wanted Matt to have his moment. "Nah, we'll let you enjoy your time with her." Nick says and Matt dramatically sighs in relief. "Thank god! I didn't want to take you guys anyways." Nick gasped. "You know what, i'm second thought." Matt shook his head. "Nope, you made up your mind."
matt
guess who's going to new york :D
y/n
no wayy?!? i'm so excited!!!
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liked by sabrinacarpenter, clairo, matthew.sturniolo, jennaortega, nicolassturniolo and 825,733 others
y/n/y/l/n: i am new york, new york is me
view all 9,372 comments
jennaortega: y/n in new york>>>
| y/n/y/l/n: you get it 🙂‍↕️
y/nfan57: it's y/n's season
y/nfan19: matt liked...
| loser4: okay? so did nick?
sadiesink_: you're so cool
matthew.sturniolo: you
| y/n/y/l/n: me
two weeks later
"I'm by the taxi pickup." Y/n said on the phone to Matt who was somewhere inside the airport. "Is there a sign or something?" Matt was having a hard time looking for the right place. "Uhm... oh yeah, there's a bright green sign that says taxi only. It's pretty big so you can't really miss it." She let out a breathy laugh. "I see it, and I see you." Y/n turned, but still couldn't see him. "Other way, pretty girl." She turned the opposite way and saw him.
"Matt!" She squealed, and ran to him as he dragged his suitcase behind with a huge smile on his face. "Y/n!" He let go of his suitcase and she jumped in his arms. "Oh my god! I can't believe you're actually here!" She whispered into his neck. "I can't believe it either." He says and she pulls away from his neck at looks at him. "You're even prettier in person." She blushes. "Stop it! I could say the same thing about you." She places her feet back on the ground. "How was your flight?" She asks. "It was good, except for the guy snoring next to me."
They arrived at Matt's hotel, and he settled in before going out for lunch together. "Okay, my favorite spot to get lunch is here." She says and Matt opens the door for her. "Thank you, Matt." Matt smiles. For the three- almost four hours they've been together, it all felt natural, as if they've known each other for years.
"What do you usually get?" He puts his arm around her shoulders and she smiles at the action. "I usually get the chicken wrap and a mango lemonade." She looks up at him. "I'll get the same." He nods and kisses her forehead. See, natural.
"What do you think?" Y/n covers her mouth as she speaks through a mouthful of her wrap. "It's very good, you weren't lying." Matt says as he goes in for another bite.
For the rest of the day, they walked around the city hand in hand, Matt pointing out at certain billboards in time square.
Later that night, they returned to Matt's hotel where Y/n said goodnight and went home. But, not without a kiss. A first kiss. "I hope you had fun today." She says as she walks towards the door. "Trust me I did. Thank you for today." He says, following behind her. "Well, I'll see you tomorrow, Matt." Y/n smiles. "For sure." He unhesitatingly grabs her jaw and plants his lips on hers with a gentle kiss.
The room was soon filled with the soft smacking sounds of their lips intertwining with each others. Soon enough her arms ended up wrapped around his neck, with her back against the door and Matt's arms holding her hips. A couple of moments later, they both pulled back gasping for air. "Wow, I- mmph!" Matt was cut off by Y/n putting her lips back on his.
"Okay, I should- I should go now." Y/n pulls away and giggles. Both of them out of breath and their lips red and swollen. "Okay, I'll see you tomorrow."
The next day, the two of them went out for breakfast and were especially giddy the whole day, sharing kisses, holding hands and small touches. "So, this one is- Matt?" Y/n stops herself. "Yeah, yup. Mhm." He says. "You weren't paying attention were you?" He breaks out in a laugh and shakes his head. "Sorry, but you're just really fucking pretty." Her cheeks redden up by the compliment.
"Matt!" He grabs her chin and kisses her. "Okay, I'll listen this time, for real."
It was now eight pm and Matt's hand was wrapped around her shoulders as usual. As they walked in a comfortable silence, Y/n heard a series of whispers behind them. Her first reaction was to look back, and as she did she saw a flash of a phone.
"Oh my god." Y/n mutters under her breath. "C'mon Matt, let's go." She grabs onto his arm and leads him to the opposite way of the stranger. Matt had noticed the person taking the picture as he also turned his head a little bit after Y/n did and saw how her mood had changed.
"Hey, you okay? You've been pretty quiet." Y/n stands in front of Matt once they've entered her apartment, moving bits of his hair that covers his eyes. "Mhm." He hums. "Matt, you can talk to me. Is it what happened with the person who took the picture?" Matt looked away from her. She had gotten it right. "Matt," She sighs, pouting slightly. "I- are you having second thoughts about this? I just- I don't know." He says. "Hey, no, of course not! It's just- I really like this little bubble we're in right now, with no unwanted opinions." She pauses before continuing on.
"And I know I shouldn't care about what people say about us or anything, but it gets to me sometimes. With my past relationships I feel like the media got involved so much that it ruined them, and- and I don't want that to happen with us. I really like you" She interlocks their hands together. "I really like you too." He gives her a soft smile before pulling her in for a kiss. "Are you okay now? Did I clear something's up." He nods. "Yes, thank you for letting me know. I really appreciate it."
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Y/n was right, the internet does have a lot of opinions. After Matt had left Y/n's apartment, even though she had told him to stay, Matt did it nightly call to his brothers before going to bed. When he had woken up in the morning, he went on social media and saw tiktok about the picture and another picture that they didn't know of and and there were many negative comments about his and Y/n's relationship. Specifically about him.
y/nsoulmate: broo... how is she going to go from dating a famous singer/actor to a youtuber💀
soulmatey/n: she should get someone better
ilivefory/n: dare i say it, but she downgraded
slutniolo: why is he dating her? isn't she on her tenth relationship?
y/nismygf: y/n, matt, if you're seeing this just know twitter is rooting and happy for you guys! tiktok police is annoying!!!!!
y/nismommy: he isn't it for her 🤷
prettyy/n: he could never treat her like danny did.. oop
ang3ly/n: y/n, baby, leave b4 u can, he's just going to use u🥴
everythingy/n: not a youtuber
y/nsgirl: why is everyone being so negative? this isn't your guys' relationship to judge or comment on. get a job, get a life!
Although the last comment made him chuckles a bit, the other comments hurt him. Were they right? Yeah, he wasn't on her level of famousness, but was it such a big deal? His phone suddenly rang in his hold as he was too deep in his thoughts. It was a call from Nick. He answered. "Good morning sunshine!" Nick said. "Why are you up so early? Isn't it six am over there?" Matt says. "I haven't slept actually. It's kind of worrying me." Nick laughed as he got comfy on his bed.
"I saw the pictures. How're you guys feeling about it?" Great, something he didn't want to think about right now. "I don't know? She wasn't the happiest when she caught that one person taking a picture, but she gave me her reasons and it was understandable. I didn't realize it at first, but she was totally right. The internet can be harsh, holy shit." Nick furrowed his eyebrows. "What do you mean?" Matt sighed and got up to sit against his headboard.
"I saw a video and the comments were a bunch of people saying that she shouldn't be with me because i'm not on her level of success, I guess, and that she also downgraded. I mean, what if they're right? What if I'm not good enough for her?" Nick felt bad, he hated that the internet was making Matt have second thoughts about his developing relationship. "Don't listen to them Matt, they're just a bunch of losers. And, you are more than enough for her. I was called her earlier today, yesterday I guess, and she was so excited to tell me what she had planned for you two. She's in deep and so are you, I can see it. There's no way you can back out now." Nick reassured him.
As Matt got ready, he thought of what Nick had said. She's in deep and so are you, I can see it. There's no way you can back out now. He was right, he is in deep. Matt knew Y/n was going back to LA a week after he was. They'd have all the time in the world to hang out. However, he wanted to be hers.
He was going to ask her today.
"Hi, pretty girl." He kissed forehead once she let him in. "Hi, how was your morning." She closed and locked the door behind him. "It was good, how about yours." They walked into her bedroom so she could continue getting ready for the day. "I had an early morning." She sighs. "I had a last minute meeting, luckily it was short and over zoom." She wraps her arms around Matt. "Hi." Y/n whispers. "Hi." He giggles and she leans up to kiss him.
"Okay- shit!" Matt stumbles a bit to the side with the bike. It was a couple of hours later and Y/n and Matt decided to rent bikes and bike around the city for a bit before heading to their planned picnic Y/n really liked to go to. "Why is it so heavy?" He says, trying to put the bike up straight. "They're so heavy for no reason, the amount of times I've fallen to the side with it is ridiculous." She starts to peddle slowly, waiting for Matt to catch up. A folded blanket is held by the basket that is on the bike.
"Are you sure you can ride the bike and carry the picnic basket at the same time?" She asks him. "I'm sure, just can't go too fast or I'll bust my shit." They rode around for thirty minutes sight seeing before heading to the park. "This looks like a nice spot." Matt pointed out an empty spot near a tree. "Okay, I'll lay out the blanket." Y/n unfolded the blanket and carefully placed it down on the grass.
"So, you're going to be in LA a week after I go back, right?" Matt says as he sips on his water bottle Y/n had packed. "Mhm, the twenty fifth. We'll finally be in the same place permanently. I'd love to hangout more with you." She smiles at him. "About that, I actually had a question for you." He caps his water and places it down next to him, moving his body to face her. "Oh, okay."
"Can I be yours, pretty girl? Officially yours." She gasps lightly and breaks into a huge smile. "You were always mine, pretty boy."
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roblogging · 16 days
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i love using this app just to complain about tiktok. if i get ONEEEE more dm that's like "hiii i love your account 🥰 do you mind giving (insert name of their own fic) a read and posting about it?" i will go INSANE.
pay me for it then idk.
im kidding i wouldnt do that BUT LIKE. i get so excited 😭😭 i always think i've made a new friend and then i open the dm to that. EVEN WORSEEE when it's an author whose stuff i genuinely really enjoy and have found naturally by myself and then :/// like oh :/// OR when they don't even follow me? like you dont haveeee to but if you're dming just for promotion at least own up to it, don't act as if you actually like me yk? got me all excited for nout :(
idk. maybe im being annoying by complaining but it irks me so much. like as much as we say to write for ourselves and not focus on the traction, that's how i am with my account. i am literally shitposting for me and people fw that, that's great!
like just dm and say you think i'd enjoy it or smth, or at least entertain a conversation with me for longer than five minutes :/ it's my lil bubble and it sucks just being reduced to that
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popstart · 2 months
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why is like every single gwuncaner insanely misogynistic and racist to courtney like their life depends on it.
like if you're bawling your eyes out about a fictional teenager that just so happens to be a woc being abusive then turning around and closing your eyes when the white guy she abused (was in a pretty mutually toxic relationship with) is similar amounts of fucking weird to two different girls get your priorities checked.
like honest to god i could not care less what characters other people on the internet like to play dolls with and imagine kissing i just think its in super poor taste to say omfg i fucking hate courtney total drama shes (insert weird racially charged language. insert comparing real human beings who like a fictional character to insects and saying you want to kill them) ok man. what. get help.
dislike or like whatever you want HONESTLY. I DO NOT CARE. im not 12 years old and i could not care less if you prefer a different fucking made up scenario where fictional characters kiss. at the end of the day literally 0 of this ship war fucking matters i promise you, i just want a similar energy back and not combination misogyny and racism fuled remarks towards the liking of a FICTIONAL FUCKING CHARACTER. THAT DID ZERO THINGS TO ANY REAL LIFE FUCKING PERSON.
Harassment of any real life fucking person about anything that they like in fiction is way more harmful than whatever happened in fiction that theyre defending. LOL!
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hella1975 · 2 years
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end of march is crazy for writing like i have a 1.5k essay im doing today and tomorrow, a 2k word essay im doing wednesday and a 1k word research proposal im doing friday. and in the remaining week of the month i am WILLINGLY going to finish taob (~10k OPTIMISTICALLY) and make a solid start on tams (~5k-10k depending on how well writing goes). like yes girl write around 20k words worth of MULTIPLE PROJECTS in a handful of days there is no way this can end badly at all
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yeonban · 8 months
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I might be ~quirky~ for this (welcome to my twisted mind and etc) but I genuinely have so much fun with shipping nowadays, ever since I chose to be singleship for each muse. I feel like my adhd has never allowed me to pour even half as much care and attention into a ship as I'd have loved to when I had multiple ones at the same time per muse, so being able to focus on a single romantic dynamic per muse really feels like a weight off my shoulders
#* ooc.   /   posts.#I also know my adhd is all over the place so at times I may go a few months w/o bringing that specific muse (and thus ship) up#(unless you approach me in dms; in which case my mind typically instantly goes !!! on the muse & ship)#so I'm INCREDIBLY touched whenever my ship partners agree to be singleship w me. It's truly such an honor and blessing to me#and I feel like it's much easier for my muse to get very attached when their romantic attention only goes to a single person;#so you can best believe that from the moment we start shipping your portrayal will ALWAYS. and I mean /ALWAYS/ be intertwined with mine#doesn't matter if you drop the muse or leave tumblr or stop writing altogether. your muse will Always be my muse's special someone#I've had tons of ships where my partner disappeared off the face of the earth one day and yet all I've done was change 'singleship'#to 'noship' bc my muse's heart to this day (several irl years later) continues to be with their portrayal; REFUSING to look at anyone else#Granted this is also why I'm so picky with shipping; in the sense that I let my muse lead the way til they fall in love#and only THEN do I ask the mun if they're fine w our muses being a thing (and thus being singleship w me)#I used to say yes to people just asking to ship and while I know that's a neat option too; I simply. Cannot do that these days ADGHSAJDSDK#nothing against anyone nor against that route; but I've had a good share of ships that crumbled or made me lose muse bc my muse wasn't#feeling the ship. so I'm no longer going ahead unless the muse falls first and makes ME start shipping it rather than the other way around#and that decision has unironically made me feel so light and comfortable here AHDSAJDSKDJ#AH NEY WAYZ!! I need to be sedated bc why am I awake at 11 am. I HAVE NOT SLEPT.
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callibones · 5 months
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debated sending this or not, b/c we don't rlly know each other and i didn't want it to sound objectifying? but please do not stop tgirl tummy tuesday. not only is it a wonderful way to boost your self confidence. it is a little treat for your followers
FAR FROM IT!!! this made me go AWWW and my eyes lit up. thank you so much.... i was so anxious agajsgsjsg this makes me feel so much better about it :-] i will continue to give my followers lil treats as long as i feel comfortable doin so and im havin fun with it! and i sure am havin fun with it
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kulliare · 6 months
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yippeeee the dices
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fenrishion · 1 year
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some thoughts
reminder to self too but making friends is really just that simple. or getting closer to someone you've always thought was cool but never talked to because you were too intimidated is also just that simple. its much easier if you have a shared interest tbh but. the worst thing is? they say no. or they ghost you.
and if it goes through? social link rank up and you get invited to do stuff!
anyway this week i made friends with a few diff groups of people ive only ever been mutuals with. and i got invited to do a bunch of things with them and got introed to their own respective friendgroups too. so im kinda happy with that!
and it turned out that they too wanted to talk to me since forever but were also just too shy to do so. maybe the world is just full of individuals who want to make friends but are too scared to make the first move.
so sometimes you have to be the one reaching out.
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quick-drawn-a · 2 years
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     to play ranked this season or no —
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steakout-05 · 6 months
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eeuuaghh i would like everyone to know that i apologise if i have not responded to your reblogs/mentions/posts on tumblr, i have really terrible social anxiety and for some reason people talking to me makes my nervous system think i'm being hunted for sport by a resident evil boss. sorry if i havent responded i'm not being rude i'm just having a panic attack :P
additionally: social anxiety is actually the reason why a lot of my old posts from late 2022 had weird spacing and spelling mistakes. i was too anxious to type properly
#sorry this seems like a random thing to post but it has been bugging me for a little bit now and i want to post it#and by a little bit i mean the entire time i've been on this website#as for the reason i have social anxiety: i went to a really terrible high school full of dangerous people-#-who were literally like. the worst most bigoted people ever. not everyone there was bad of course but 90% of them were-#-and that stunted by social development by 5-6 years and now every time someone talks to me i feel like i'm about to get murdered#also primary school was. bad. the other kids could sniff out the autism in me and didn't like me for it#this post isn't directed towards anyone specifically but also it kinda is because there's a DM from someone-#-that i haven't responded to in literally 8 months and every time i think about it i get anxious#i'm sorry!!! i'm not trying to ignore you on purpose and i want to say something but my brain literally will not let me out of fear :(#i'm not used to getting talked to directly so every time i do my entire nervous system starts screaming and running in circles#it's kinda ridiculous because it's like. come on. why are you having a panic attack over a message on tumblr it's LITERALLY just words on-#-a screen what are you freaking out about. but also it's like hhhhh unfamiliar social situation scary. help.#unrelated to that but i am very worried about what people will think of me and like i know i really shouldn't worry about that-#-because i can't control what other people think of me and it really shouldn't be any of my or their business. but also-#-i have legitimate trauma that backs my fears up and every time someone is even slightly critical towards me my brain just goes-#-''see? it happened again i TOLD you it would happen again. idiot. you shouldn't have said anything''#and then i hide and cry and lay in bed thinking about how i'm going to die until i suddenly snap out of it and think-#-''wait hang on why should i care. i love being a weirdo on the internet why should i let my anxieties stop me''#and then it happens AGAIN and it's just a viscous cycle at that point#be silly on the internet -> detect slight criticism -> think everyone hates you again -> go back on your bullshit after 3 days of crying#and it makes sense because that exact same pattern happened to me countless times as a child.#be silly in school -> get made fun of for it -> get hated for it -> rinse and repeat until you think everyone is dangerous and they hate yo#if i could put it in a metaphor it would be like me being a little rabbit who thinks everyone is a scary wolf because of their big shadows-#-even though they're all also rabbits and i'm just paying attention to the scariest parts of them because i only know what wolves look like#trauma does fucked up things to your psyche lemmie tell you#social anxiety#anxiety disorder#i'm literally the ''too scared to order food'' stereotype except it's not a stereotype because it's real and every time i look at the 7/11-#-at my campus i go ''hm but what if they hate me for the food i buy there'' even though they're LITERALLY SELLING IT what is WRONG with me#anyway um. social anxiety sucks and i don't mean to not reply ro everyone who talks to me i am sorr y
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aq2003 · 2 years
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im being 1000% serious when i say escape from the bloodkeep is the best my favorite d20 sidequest and i cannot fathom why anyone would hate it
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feroluce · 2 years
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incredibly sexy of you to be blankshipping on main and in the tags <3 and with incredible takes and ideas on top of that!
Thank you Anon, it's so hard having the biggest dick in the room, but someone has to do it 😔
As a slightly? more serious answer, I think it's good and even important to have people being loud and proud and totally self-accepting on main in the proship circles. Like there needs to be someone showing the people who got bought in on the anti stances and are then beating themselves up for totally normal things that it's ok. You aren't a bad person just for liking something problematic about a play-pretend character in a make-believe scenario and you don't need to sink into self-loathing over such a thing.
Because some of them are in actual agony over this stuff, and some of them have already accepted this about themselves but are too deep in the anti circles now, so they'd lose their entire support system if they were outed. Not to mention how creepily violent and invasive antis get about proshippers- and as someone in actual anti spaces, you'd have a front row seat to all the atrocities people would wish on you, or maybe even go so far as to commit them themselves.
Like you know how people talk about extremely strict religious parents? How they would try to control a lot of the thoughts and actions in their child's life? And then sometimes even get violent when they didn't comply? All while excusing it as trying to keep them from sinning or being a bad person? It's the exact same thing. And it has a lot of the same effects, too. Antis aren't beating the problematic out of each other. They're just plain beating and traumatizing each other and then making each other into better liars who secretly hang out on the proship servers on the downlow.
And it sucks! It sucks so bad! Because I've talked to people in those exact situations and like. Especially the fact that a lot of them are still young. Like barely young adults. Some of them are still technically teenagers. They shouldn't be dealing with this bullshit at what's already such a tender and difficult age. And it makes my heart ache and my blood boil because some of them are outright scared and there's just not a lot that I can do about it. You can't shield or protect someone from all of that and it sucks.
So like yeah I'm gonna be noisy and annoying and yowl right on main because at least with that I can give people somewhere to go where they feel decently safe and accepted, even if they never interact once. That's what got us the blankshipping server, because our creator was in the anti servers while sending me blankshipping asks and decided "you know what this sucks actually" lol. That's what brought in a lot of our members, because I could yell my heart out into the void here and! People heard! And then they joined the server and found a place they could finally breathe! And it's so much fun in there now!! ♡
Anyway tl;dr thank you dear lovely Anon you are entirely correct I am incredibly sexy and everyone desires me carnally and my dick is huge and I haunt the submas servers with how I live in their minds rent free skzjkdksjd
#my heart goes out to the people caught in such terrible sticky situations like this#I got an ask once where they forgot to put it on anon and then got a dm from the same person where they were PANICKING about it#because they were so scared that I was going to accidentally out them by answering the ask#(if you see this sweetheart then I hope you know I'm rooting for you and I've never told a soul- not even my fellow shippers;#that secret comes with me to my grave)#this is also why I always keep anon on- I'd rather let the people in hiding or on the fence interact safely than not at all#like god but for real though#my biggest respect to the shippers who are able to lay low and control themselves#they used my name to test the blackout/censorship/whatever you call it function in the anti server and like#I just know if I'd been online at the time I wouldn't have been able to help myself#I would have given up my secret identity in a heartbeat for the bit#because it was just a bunch of people chanting my name like they were playing Bloody fuckin Mary and I woulda popped my head in there like#'yes you rang' BSKKDJXKDKDK#funniest fucking thing I'd ever seen it made my entire week I was in PUBLIC at the time out to lunch with my MOTHER#do you guys have any idea how horribly I must have failed at keeping a straight face BSKDKJZKSKKKD#and then I accidentally got drunk on too much rum and went to a craft show it was a good day dfkljadfkakda#I used to love seeing the blocklists every week too because my name was always at the top but then they started alphabetizing it rude orz#I think the last one I saw was from somewhere else though bc it wasn't alphabetized and DINGO was 2nd from the top while I was way below#*shakes fist* HOW DARE YOU DINGO#I almost didn't wanna answer this ask I wanted to keep it because it gives me warm fuzzies thank you anon haha#the horrors never cease but fun little things like this make it easier <3#ask#answer#anon
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turianosauruswrex · 2 months
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made another critter I'm obsessed with oh no. this is Wormwood, she's radioactive, it's a feature not a bug. my long-time group has a player out for the foreseeable future so DM whipped up a future AU for our setting, and, well. the fey got nukes. naturally, because this is my character, a cult sprang up around the site of the bomb drop, specifically focused on containing it and pleasing whatever force the fey unleashed with it so that this doesn't happen again, ever. they go about it a little weird.
thus, Wormwood is an eladrin Pestilence domain cleric from Valda's Spire of Secrets my beloved, tweaked from the MP:MotM version of eladrin to have Fey Step that uh. well. turns her into a bomb. instead of the effects changing with the seasons on a long rest, they stack and do progressively more radiant damage and worse effects, subject to saves, until it overloads to a meltdown. I also have to make these saves or get a status effect and eventually suffer fallout damage. always, always so thrilled with what this DM comes up with for my characters' homebrew.
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kittycatnapping · 4 months
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Hello dear mutuals whom I've never directly contatced before, reccommend me some music to listen to. I wanna know what kinda tunes you like
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chimerafeathers · 6 months
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genuinely baffled by the comments i've seen saying op 2 is somehow less tonally appropriate than op 1
like. yes, the story DOES get more intense, layered, emotional, and at times gruesome. it also continues to be joyful, loving, goofy, and comedic. it's cute! it's FUN! even when dark shit is happening, the lightness is what makes those moments hit harder!
imo they really nailed the imagery and characterization, especially with Laios "waking up" from his blissful dream of all his friends smiling and happy to be eating monsters on this adventure with him. there are a lot of things that felt directly inspired by specific images/concepts straight from the manga, not even counting the whole "dissolving into mana" thing.
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considering that they didn't go lighthearted for op 1 (where it would have been the most appropriate) and how MUCH more intense things will become in the second season as the Canaries truly enter the game, this was kind of our only chance to get a fully silly and joyous op. i'm hoping for a balance of intensity & comedy in the remaining ops whenever s2 is animated, kind of like the Beastars op 1 that swings back and forth between the "romance" and the "horror" aspects of the story. i wouldn't mind a fully "intense" op for the end, but if they go that direction then i'm even happier we got a fully "fun" op here, bc this series does BOTH very very well and i wanted to see that represented.
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to me it feels VERY much like the way Kui does worldbuilding where a bunch of details that seem like cutesy, comedic one-offs or throwaway comments become way more relevant and powerful later. dissolving into colorful pretty lights in a white void being ominous foreshadowing for those in the know. the party ending up in a cooking pot seeming like a very obvious "eat or be eaten" thing, but also connecting to the dungeon's cycles of consumption & how they're not ONLY under threat because of monsters but because of their own desires.
anyway, i think it's great and i'm excited to spend the rest of the season enjoying the fun expressions and little details of personality and whimsy in every frame
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syrinq · 1 year
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thinking about the fact that i do like forgotton realms-adjecent (fantasy equivalent of star wars-sized ip) games but then i have to grab a broom and hit anyone appearing out of the shadows who goes "now play dnd (or any ttrpg) with me" extremely violently so they remain in the dark for another 5 million years
#HOMIE YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND IT'S THE FUCKING TTRPG AND ENTIRE MEDIUM ASPECT AND MATH PART AND RANDOM WACKYNESS THAT I LOATHE#IF I PLAYED DND I WOULD BE ONE OF THOSE “BY THE RULE” NERDS BECAUSE IF YOU RANDOMLY PULL OUT A BULLSHIT WAY TO UNDERMINE THE DM'S EFFORTS#WITHOUT THEIR APPROVAL THEN GOD HELP YOU!#anyway ttrpgs arent my thing whatsoever and i'm actually surprised some people do not seem to be understanding that despite the fact#why yes. i do like fantasy and any setting very much if executed well#anyway forgotten realms lore is not one of those things. is anyone going to tell me the real gist of the 'multiverse' that really seem to b#just a case of multiple galaxies and planes/dimensions or are you just gping to throw 3 in-universe cosmology maps at me#there really should be a distinction between how it really is and in-universe explanations because that really is the way i dig it#unfortunately. i have yet to See One IP do it That Way and also explaib Why in Intricate Nice Details#I love bitches who explain Why and Cause And Effect and not just give me raw facts data numbers through historical events#yeah if you can tell me exactly why this species loathes x or y or evolved to be this way then great! i love you very much!#otherwise fuck off because no reasoning and 'it just is' reads as 'this is just cool to me' or 'im too lazy to think abt it' or the#adult bullshit excuse of 'well because i said so!'#YEAH OKAY FINE YOU DONT NEED TO EXPLAIN THE NITTYGRITTY OF EVERYTHING BUT BOY! DO I LOVE REASONING AS TO WHY SOMETHING ACTS/LOOKS/DOES/IS!#OTHERWISE? MAKES 0 SENSE TO ME. THANK YOU AND GOOD NIGHT#why call it forgotten REALMS if your biggest focus is one fucking continent (faerun)#this also goes for very real stuff btw. like okay i get why a game can work essentially on a stupid display because it all comes down to#sand doing math and true/false statements etcetera. but as to how consciousness forms into a growing clump of cells. who knows#i also don't understand the concept that we need opposites for fucking everything in human-made theories like newton's law#or an explanation for 'holes' in THEORETICAL frameworks. such as what dividing 0 by 0 is. and then hanging onto those frameworks as if#they're 100% real and truth. mate it's truth from the perspective of humans but i guess i'll just not go meta here. this is dumb
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