#theyre not wet enough for me

[zxmbigirlfriend]

stuilly week day 1- au

i will take literally any excuse to draw gross evil lesbians. if only i could draw them the whole week💔💔

[vitamin-zeeth]

thing is the state of labour is so piss poor I can barely revel in the Tories getting fucked. yay we're not at absolute rock fucking bottom any more I guess.

[good-beanswrites]

Hello! I really really really love your writting, I just got into Milgram and yours is my favourite in the fandom!! I love how much depth and nuance you manage to fit into short stories and your characterization is on point! (Specially for Kazui, but I might be biased since I love him so much)

I'm not sure if you're still taking requests (if you're not, feel free to ignore!), but if you are I wanted to request Tears + Kazui

(I thought about maybe the old man finally having a moment where the mask falls? When keeping up the image he's built gets tiring, how does he deal with it, and is he by himself or is there someone nearby? Then again, just an ideia, have fun and take your time!!!)

Woo welcome to the fandom! And thank you so much omg, that's so kind!! ;--; I really like that concept -- I definitely think he'd only allow himself a break from the masks when he's completely alone, and even then it'd be hard to draw out of him, so I went for an unexpected release and even more unexpected company... (Haruka :3)

Kazui woke from a dream, immediately unable to stop his eyes from brimming with tears. It hadn’t been a nightmare. It hadn’t shown him broken glass, or blood, or screaming. He hadn’t faced another night staring into Hinako’s twisted expression. No, the dream was wonderful. He was happy. He was in love. He was just… himself. As he rolled over in his sheets, he couldn’t tell if it was the longing that made him cry, or the guilt of longing so deeply for something like that.

It was easier, there in the dark. He didn’t have to keep his cheeks raised in a pleasant look. He didn’t have to hold his chin high. He could hug his arms around himself, not worry about all those eyes on him, and cry for the life he would never have.

He’d kept the thoughts at bay for so long, there was something equally painful and relieving about facing them head-on. The more his body shook with sobs, the better he felt about the weight he’d been carrying on his shoulders. The more he thought about who he was, the worse he felt about being doomed in this life. As always, he was split in two.

“K-Kazui?” 

His stomach clenched in both shock and shame. He kept his face away from the cell bars. He coughed, though it did little to hide the thickness in his voice when he spoke. “Haruka? What are you doing out there?”

“Ah, um! I’m sorry! I was just getting s-some water.”

Kazui desperately scrambled for any kind of excuse to explain the sorry state he was in. Haruka continued, though. 

“It’s- it’s okay if you’re crying.”

His throat squeezed. How pathetic he must be, for a kid like Haruka to try and comfort him.

“No, no. I’m alright.”

“I cry in my cell all the time. And Muu comes in so we can talk. I feel m-much better after that.” His feet shuffled outside. “Do you… uh… do you want to talk? I’m not as smart as Muu, b-but it might help.”

Kazui kept his pained smile hidden. It was an incredibly kind gesture, to be sure, but the boy would never understand. He could open up about everything that had happened in the past forty years, and there was no way Haruka would understand a bit of it.

It was easy to dodge the question. When under the spotlight, he’d found it was helpful to place the attention on someone else. “What do you talk to Muu about?”

“Uh! Well.” There was more shuffling, and Kazui realized he was coming to sit right next to the cell. He hadn’t meant it as an invitation to stay... 

He rolled onto his back, hoping his face was still obscured in the shadows of the panopticon.

“I usually cry because… I’m not like everyone else.” Haruka said. “I don’t-don’t know why. I don’t know why everyone else can be normal and I j-just can’t. I try so hard. I try so hard. If I could be like them, m-maybe my mom would’ve loved me. M-maybe she wouldn’t think I was broken all the time. M-maybe,” he got quiet, “no one would have died.”

Kazui stared up at the ceiling. A few more tears slipped down his face. It looked like an old man like him could still be wrong, now and then. “And… what does Muu tell you, to comfort you?”

“Oh, she tells me lots of nice things. Mostly that she loves me very much.” Kazui could hear the smile in his voice. “And she also says that… that it wasn’t my fault. That there’s nothing wrong with being me. That we can’t be anyone d-different, even if we want to more than anything in the whole wide world. She says, she says people were mean to her too, just because of who she was.”

“Yeah?” The younger prisoners had avoided someone as intimidating as him, so he never heard much about Muu’s reason for being here. 

“Mhm. She said they would say all these awful things, b-because there was this one girl in her class, and… and, well… things were…” Haruka stopped. “Ah! I didn’t mean to make you cry again! I’m s-so sorry…”

Kazui sucked in a shaking breath. “No, I’m sorry you have to hear all this from me. It’s good, though. It’s really good.” 

“O-oh…?”

“I just realized, I’m a lot like that too.” 

Kazui didn’t know what possessed him to continue. He’d been hiding things for so long, he thought he’d be better at keeping it in. It must have been something about the darkness of the hour, and Haruka’s complete innocence, and the dream that still lingered around heart. 

“When I was her age, there was someone in my class like that. He was… well, I’m sure you know. My parents also said I was in need of fixing. I’m sorry you had to go through that too.”

Haruka let out a small sound of acknowledgement.

“You should head to bed, now. It’s late.”

“R-right. Sorry, again!”

“Don’t be. I think I needed this.”

Once Haruka’s footsteps had rounded the panopticon, Kazui brought his arm up to cover his eyes. He knew he had plenty of blood on his hands for what he’d done. This was his fault. But regarding who he was…

A sound rocked through his chest, something between a sob and a laugh. It was nice to think there was nothing wrong with that, after all.

[red-dyed-sarumane]

every time i interact with an angel post while i have tenshi as my icon i get so frustrated over how "fork found in kitchen" it is. like yeah u would like the angsty or complex story or art ideas wouldnt u. & then im mad bc yeah. i do. and i cant even argue it bc i do.

[venomgaia]

what's good about a pilot falcon?

HI! The Pilot Falcon (older generations were sold in the US as the Namiki Falcon for whatever reason) is a japanese fountain pen manufactured by Pilot!

it's often referred to as the best modern flex pen, or the best gold nib for a beginner! Tldr for people who aren't pen nerds, a flex pen is a pen that...well, flexes! Most pens have some sort of "flex" to them that results in some sort of line variation, but flex pens can handle a relatively higher amount of pressure. Think like a G nib used in a lot of manga. Old pens were the MASTERS at this, and a good bit of that is due to the nibs being made of gold, which naturally has a "bounce" to it that modern steel nibs have a really hard time living up to. Most people wax poetic about Waterman or other vintages like that because of it. Even modern gold nibs can't really keep up with the gold nibs of yore, but the Falcon is considered to be one that can. I do think legally it's considered a "soft" nib, meaning it's not truly a flex pen but has a lot of flex qualities to it, but some terms that get used are used interchangably so. idk. True flex nibs aren't really a thing in fountain pens these days outside of Noodler's Ahab and Konrad (which are their own nightmare and a half tbh).

The Falcon prized amongst artists for it's very fine nib, which Japanese pen manufacturers like Pilot and Platinum are known for. A Japanese Fine is comparable to a Western (Kaweco, Lamy) Extra fine, and a lot of these pens come in an EF, F, and M. It gets alot of nice line variation despite being so small, and is really an all-around great pen, if legend is to be believed :] An alternative to buying the Pilot Falcon would be getting the Pilot 912 FA, which has something called the "Falcon Nib," not to be confused with the actual pen. They actually look pretty different. The FA nib (right) has these weird cuts on their side that help with flexing and allow it to mimic a full-flex nib, but again. According to legend, modern pens don't flex like vintage pens do, but it IS pretty close.

(sources mentioned in alt text)

I've never used either myself, but I'm pretty picky about my pens and so I don't know if I'd ever pay upwards of $200 unless I got familiar with the nib first tbh....The falcon's nib isn't offputting to me like many feel about it, but I'm particular about aesthetics and the feedback on paper and I can't tell if I like them just from looks alone lol. Right now, I don't have much experience with pilot nibs, but if i were to get a pilot pen, tbh I'm looking at the Pilot Elite/e95s in a fine or medium, or a vintage platinum pocket pen.

Anyways that's that and this is also that. *twirls so elegantly and then collapses onto the ground in slapstick fashion*

[ozymoron]

no more buff men!!!!!!!!!!!! no more!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i cant takr it anymore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[slocumjoe]

Horrible thought that is mildly oc related but like

Underwater feral ghouls, maybe non feral too

A ghoulified scubba diver, people who were on a boat and fell into the water, now forever roaming the sea floor. I don't know how they got the ability to breathe under water but we can ignore that for now because I hate to think

But just underwater ghouls. Hate the idea it's scary. Imagine going for a swim and you run into a ghoul whole legs have fused together and said ghoul is swimming toward you WAY too fucking fast hm hate that thought

GHOUL MERMAIDS?!?!

TODD COUGH THEM THE FUCK UP 🔫🔫🔫

[bmpmp3]

holy FUCK IA's voisona 2.0 is OUT

[joelletwo]

[blubbering abt childhood friends kyuutae already] lol if shimura dad tried to matchmake them. bwahhhh at tae being onboard and doing her own short king propaganda.

[ilovetodrinkwater]

i need like 12 hours of aimless wandering a week or i get scurvy

[screamingay]

finally snuck myself an adderall (10 mg) and at first i was worried that i was feeling manic or jittery (which would mean everyone was right and i'm just bad at everything and it's my fault) but then i realized... my body isn't used to the ability to think about doing something and then immediately getting up to do it so it was a little overwhelming to gain that ability all of a sudden. my whole life (except for rare, unpredictable, and uncontrollable hours of productivity) whenever i've thought to myself "i want/need to get up and do [thing]" i would just keep sitting there and feel increasingly guilty for not doing it.

my parents would plead with me to brush my teeth before bed as a kid, asking why i couldn't just get up for 5 minutes and do it, and i'd cry and say i don't know, i'm sorry, i promise i want to brush my teeth. my teachers would keep me after class in high school and ask me why i hadn't done a project they knew i could do, they knew i did fine on everything else, but how could i tell them that i just couldn't bring myself to sit down and do the research or start writing, and i'd choke back tears as i told them i didn't know why, i'm sorry, i promise i want to do your project.

today i've done about 20 chores and projects that i've been meaning to get to for days, weeks, months. i cleaned the toaster oven, put up some more coat hooks to get the coats off the floor, washed 2 rounds of dishes and a put in a load of laundry, put away all the clean clothes and picked up the floor so it's walkable again, rounded up all the hair dye supplies and gave them their own spot, put away some things that had been out of place for a long time, and i still have energy to bag up the garbage in the bedroom, fix the patch on my jeans, and finish the laundry once it's done. probably even more after that. things that would usually drain me for hours individually, or would take hours because i'd give up or get distracted halfway through.

i never drank coffee because whenever i did it made me jittery and fucked up my heartbeat but this prescription shit.. this is good. getting my own prescription would be lovely but would take forever and be very difficult, so for now im more than happy to settle for predictable & controllable bursts of productivity rather than my usual unpredictable, uncontrollable ones.

[pertinax--loculos]

Without fail, every time I tell someone I have an irrational hatred of umbrellas, their knee-jerk response is always "why?"

Like, I DON'T KNOW, MARGARET, THAT'S WHY IT'S IRRATIONAL.

[urlovebot]

but what if phone sex with sunghoon!

a/n: i need him asap.

cw: phone sex. kinda public. mutual masturbation, mentions of breeding, face fucking, degradation & praise sandwiches, reader cums once, sunghoon is a whore so he cums twice.

── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅ ──

── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅ ──

"show me your tits"

you start to pull your tanktop up and off but he stops you-

"no baby, do it from the top. 'want it to look like it does when i fuck you in it."

sunghoon was an insatiable man. you're convinced he's a succubus and just hasnt told you yet. it doesnt matter where he is, if he needs to get off, he will. no question or hesitation, he will slip away and make himself cum.

today, he's in the bathroom of a restaurant. he left with his friends to go eat, (not without fucking you right before, of course) not even two hours ago and, well, here you are now. facetiming while he's got his phone in one hand, cock in the other.

you pull your shirt down from the top, stretching the low cut tank top under your bra.

"play with 'em"

you set the phone down and grab your tits in your hands. at least he was considerate, making you cum with him. you let out a soft moan in the process.

sunghoons eyebrows pinch together, mouth opening just enough the let out a sigh,

"yeah... yeah," he feels his cock twitch at the sight, "that's it. good girl."

once he's satisfied and ready to move on, he gives you your next command.

"take your bra off."

you hurry to unhook it, excited to keep going but-

"slowly. take your time, yeah?"

you roll your eyes and huff in response but sunghoon is not having it.

"just cause i'm away doesn't mean you get to be a fucking brat. do what i said." he does a quick nod for you to continue on.

you do as he says. once its off, you hear him sigh into the phone. he loves your body. sunghoon fucking loves your body. loves the little noises you make, the faces you make, how needy you are. he wants to keep his cock in you all day.

"let me see your pretty pussy baby."

you lower the camera to show everything but your face. you were kneeling on the bed in only a tanktop. life is easier this way, easy access to your body. especially when your boyfriend likes to surprise you by bending you over and fucking you when he feels like it.

"let me see how wet you are."

sunghoons head spins as you lift two fingers back up to the camera and theyre glistening in the light, strings of arousal connecting the two when you pull them apart. he feels his balls jump and has to take his hand off of his cock to not cum too early. he pans his camera down as well.

your mouth waters. sunghoon was already hung so the sight of his pretty cock with an angry red tip made you drip onto the bed.

"god i wanna fuck your mouth again. felt so damn good this morning."

your two fingers circle your clit,

"i loved it, we should do it again soon."

sunghoon chuckles at you,

"god you're a fucking whore. i love you for it," his finger traces the his tip, "can you- ah fuck-"

sunghoon puts his hand back on his cock and immediately jerks forward, "can you lay on the bed with your head hanging off the edge next time? i wanna-"

you watch as sunghoon throws his head back, hand reaching around his cock to play with his balls as his cock jumps and twitches at the thought of his request.

"wanna fuck your mouth that way. i wanna see it fill up your throat-"

sunghoon lets out a stuttered moan and it has you throbbing. you push two fingers into your cunt, other hand going down to rub your clit.

"i'd wrap my hand around it so i can feel it. and when i pull out-" sunghoon lurches forward again, clearly delaying his orgasm. he removes his hand and his cock remains standing against his stomach.

"when i pull out, i'd slap it against your face," he puts his hand back on his cock, leisurely stroking it once again, "you'd like that wouldn't you? you wanna be my pretty slut? fuck. fuck"

at this point you're grinding into your hands.

"its not enough hoon. come home," you remove your fingers and put them in your mouth. sunghoons eyes widen and he lets out a long winded whine. you continue, "i need you inside me. god i need you to fill me up again."

"yeah baby? you need me to make you feel good?" sunghoon thinks he's going to explode and then you say-

"want you to put a baby in me hoon. please baby, please come home and put a baby in me."

and at that, sunghoons body locks up. his jaw falls open and his eyebrows pinch together and his hand stills as he blows his load. ropes of cum leave his cock and it almost looks like hes in pain. even without seeing him, you'd definitely be able to hear him.

"fuck- i'm gonna put a baby in you. yeah- shit- im gonna..." a moan rips through his throat, "i'm gonna plug my spunk into you. fuck my cum inside you over and over-"

and at this point, he is in pain. he's fisting his cock so hard at the thought of breeding you that he cums again. its dry, harsh, it rips through his body and he convulses a little bit.

when he comes to, he sees you've cum too. chest heaving, skin glistening with sweat.

he's made an absolute mess of himself. cum stains his shirt and pants.

"sunghoon!"

he laughs at your worried expression,

"don't worry baby. it's my excuse to come home."

[madokathoughts]

this!! homura always felt like an anti-hero to me? if i'm using that term right lol

she also feels realistic because. nobody is going to have perfectly sane actions after going through all the things she did especially at. 14 years old. 14 year olds already make Bad Decisions (i know some people argue she's 26 because of her 12 year looping but i Don't Like that theory.. you can't really mature doing nothing but relive the same thing over and over. she's not maturing she's just getting more and more traumatized)

i feel like she's going to have even more morally gray/questionable actions in the upcoming movie,, can't wait for the Debates to start again (sarcasm)

adding onto my last post (linked here), and maybe this is a hot take, but honestly:

homura taking madoka’s powers and rewriting the universe was a morally gray action. Not totally justifiable but also not totally irredeemable. She’s justified in the fact that if she hadn’t, kyubey probably would’ve used madoka in order to bring back the old magical girl system with witches. It’s not totally justifiable though because she goes against madoka’s wishes and desires.

“But madoka was lonely being a god.”

that’s correct. She was lonely and wasn’t fully happy being a god (displayed in the lyrics of the first ending). Even then though, she weighed her options and chose this one knowing what she would sacrifice. And objectively (key word being objectively. It does not matter how you view this scene this is what homura is objectively doing by taking Madoka’s powers) homura kinda invalidates that.

this isn’t something irredeemable on homura’s part but it does mean homura’s action is a very complex and a morally gray one that can’t just be boiled down to being a good thing or a bad thing. It’s a mix of both.

and even if homura’s action was an entirely good thing, homura’s action does nothing but prolong the inevitable. Her world is kinda falling at the seems, with how easy it was for madoka to nearly gain her memories back.

that doesn’t mean her actions are totally evil either. She didn’t do what she did to “have madoka for herself”. Frankly anyone who believes that that was any part of her motive to do what she did didn’t pay attention when watching the anime and movie. She does strongly (and I use strongly very heavily here lol) love madoka but she’s not a yandere who isolated madoka from those she loves to have her all to herself like some people act like she is.

It’s just…I really do wish people would understand that her actions as a whole and specifically in rebellion don’t need to be seen as exclusively a good or bad thing. In the some way as how I said in my previous post that homura just wanting to protect her loved but also doing some morally questionable actions aren’t as mutually exclusive as the pmmm fandom pretends they are.

[southislandwren]

HUGE FUCKING WIN!! i can wear the new shoes