#they're just freaks tbh

[morsmortish]

HI. do u have any rosekiller fics you’d recommend ?? for research<3 (research being giggling manically at two gay psychos in love)

hmmmmm

i would say that possibly my fav rosekiller dynamics are in the one shots by roadsidehorror on ao3, they're so chaotic and yet also so endearing there, without losing too much of the 'psycho' that i sometimes find lacking in fics.

for longer fics, i highly recommend "i would say i love you (but it's so hard, i won't say it at all)" by graveryavery, which is a lovely little friends-to-lovers roadtrip au that i ADORE, or "starvin' darlin'" by showinalittlelife, where barty is a cannibal and evan is terminally ill, or "show me those pretty white jaws" by 214liacsky, which i found on here when i was exploring the idea of catholic guilt and bcj, and it captures it perfectly!

i think i've only ever read one fic where evan is characterised in the way i see him, as that off-putting, weird little freak that stands in the corner of the room and stares unblinkingly at you, whilst barty is some sort of racoon-hyena hybrid that bounces off the walls and makes it his life's mission to win over evan, and that's "pickup or delivery" by lifeisabitch, and i LOVE it for those reasons and more.

(special shoutout to messermoon's protrayal of rosekiller, esp in of his bones, which is my all time favourite fanfiction ever)

[pseudophan]

This is not at all topical but why do u think they did the 2017 baking video without shirts under that fuckass conjoined jumper.

they just really enjoyed the slapping noises

[p4nishers]

is no one gonna talk about the blue and green????? IS NO ONE GONNA TALK ABOUT THE FUCKING BLUE AND GREEN?????

[lale-txt]

heartbreaking! one of your favorite artists makes fun of y/n fics!

[mamawasatesttube]

fandom and all its """kon resents clark""" this and """clark is mean to/mistrusts kon""" that. actually, kon canonically goes to clark to bitch about his rogues gallery:

"Superboy's told me all about this guy."

(adventures of superman #533)

can you imagine? he just calls up superman to talk shit about scavenger (and presumably others too!!). i just know he's lounging midair in the most ridiculous poses while slurping up a milkshake he made clark buy him and spouting ridiculous teen slang that clark has to make several mental notes to look up later. this is the mark of a truly beautiful family bond and i, for one, would like to see more of it.

[sparky-is-spiders]

Jonelias Week Day 1 (Which is definitely today I swear), for the prompt "No Powers AU"

This one... maybe got away from me. This is actually only the first half of what I've written so far, and probably the first third overall! I do plan to post this to Ao3 at some point (although I suspect I'll need to do a lengthy round of editing first lmao). It's some very self-indulgent nonsense, which is a lot of what I write, but now it's getting put in the main tags of a ship during said ship's event week. So. It may also be a little bit "aromantic dude tries to figure out what having a crush is supposed to be like." Also a lot of "dude who took Principals of Accounting once pretending it knows what office work is like." Anyway, quick warning before we begin, and the rest will be under the read-more:

Stalking (played for laughs) for most of the fic.

Just. A weird amount of obsession.

Ok that should be it I think. Fic under the cut.

Jon's new boss was, quite possibly, the most boring man in the world. He wore the same outfit every day (pale dress shirt with dark unpatterned tie and gray slacks and matching suit jacket). The only personal effect in his entire office was a potted plant on the windowsill (some sort of succulent, and definitely fake). He always arrived to work exactly half an hour early and left exactly half an hour late. The only hobby he appeared to show any interest in was scheduling, which he seemed to find both deeply engaging and remarkably irritating. In fact, he was apparently so opposed to the idea of mixing his work with his personal life that he might as well not have existed beyond the walls of their office. Jon had never been more fascinated by anyone else in his entire life.

It stared with the transfer to the accounting department. Elias had met with him personally to get him acclimated to his new role. He had been blandly polite, and blandly handsome, and Jon had stopped listening to him about five minutes into their conversation. It was probably bad form, really. The software Elias was droning on and on about sounded like it was about to become a central feature of his days. He really should've been paying attention to it. Instead, he pretended to make eye contact while zeroing in on the top of Bouchard's forehead (a very useful trick, really) and became inordinately focused on the small lock of hair that had fallen across it. It was terribly distracting, and Jon had wondered how he hadn't noticed it. And then he wondered how it had come to be there. And then he had built up an entire story involving a murder, an illicit affair with the assistant director of marketing, and the potted succulent. And then he had noticed Bouchard eying him with what could've been suspicion or amusement or irritation or nothing whatsoever, and had been forced to rapidly pretend to care about their company's bad debt expense policy. Bouchard had indulged him, and had spoken with the calm authority of someone who knew what they were talking about, and had even managed to avoid being overtly condescending (a feat forever out of Jon's reach). At the end he had shaken Jon's hand (with a nice, firm grip), and had told him "I'm looking forward to working with you, I'm sure you'll make a wonderful member of our team." Jon had left that meeting with a mind shrouded in a fog of boredom and a faint sensation of warmth which he decided was best attributed to curiosity and left otherwise unexamined. Over the next few weeks, Jon had tried to subtly inquire into Bouchard's life. At the time, he had been naively under the impression that surely he must have let slip something about his life; some odd quirk or funny story or harmless bit of information which could justify Jon's blooming curiosity. Unfortunately; "He lives in Chelsea, I'm pretty sure?" (Sasha) "He's currently in a meeting. Honestly Jon, you'll be better off just sending an email. Now can I please get back to work?" (Rosie, probably lying about the meeting) "He actually lives here in the office. Set up a cozy little home away from home in one of the storage closets and sneaks out at night to raid the canteen. And he's having an affair with the assistant director of marketing." (Tim, definitely lying (but maybe a mind reader? Also, full of brilliant ideas for places Jon could maybe set up a cot whenever he needs to stay overnight)) Clearly, Jon would have to take matters into his own hands if he wanted answers. That was fine. It could be his own private little research project.

Jon liked to think that the entire thing had actually been quite reasonable, and that he had acted within the bounds of their pre-established relationship as employee and supervisor. Surely any rational person had to realize that nobody could possibly be that uninteresting. Anyone would be curious as to what dark secrets Bouchard his behind his well-tailored suits and polite, professional demeanor. … perhaps most rational persons would not meticulously record the movements, behavior, and daily appearance of their colleague in a discreet notebook (with annotations, color-coding, and graphs where appropriate), but Jon had always prided himself on his dedication to research and understanding. So far Jon had collected frustratingly little data. If Bouchard was hiding anything, it wasn't apparent from his schedule (see pages 8-13, figure 2.b), his eating habits (see page 22), or his lone plant (see page five, figure 1.c). His breaks did seem specially timed to avoid other people (and he appeared not to engage in many social behaviors generally), but he never acted irritated or otherwise unhappy to encounter one of his subordinates, so Jon wasn't entirely sure if it was deliberate avoidance or simple coincidence. Really, the only truly odd thing about him was his inexplicable interest in Jon. That very morning, for example, Bouchard had stopped by his cubicle for a fifteen minute discussion on the upcoming Annual Team Luncheon, an event Jon had never attended before (due to an annual migraine which coincidentally always happened to occur on the exact date of the luncheon), which Jon did not plan to attend, and which honestly sounded like some sort of violation of the Geneva Convention. The topic itself was not especially odd (small talk was an archaic tradition which had stubbornly clung on in every workplace Jon had ever set foot in), but Bouchard's low propensity for inter-office socialization combined with the fact that he had both chosen Jon specifically as his conversational partner was… highly suspicious. Most people who encountered Jon inevitably concluded that he was more effort than he was worth (an attitude Jon mostly appreciated).

And of course, there had also been their interaction two days ago, when Elias had paused briefly to inquire as to whether Jon would be staying late, and what he was working on, and if he might perhaps consider heading home soon because there was only so much overtime they could pay him. Or on Friday, when he had managed to hold two separate conversations with Jon where very little was said. Honestly, Jon somewhat suspected that Elias had spoken to him more in the past few weeks than he had spoken to any of their colleagues for the entire time Jon had been there to observe him. Most of Jon's notes were now dedicated to their interactions. From his cot in the unused storage room (which was indeed a good place to stay overnight, thank you Tim), he could jot down everything he recalled about their interaction; it had begun at 8:32 and had concluded at 8:47; the weather was warm and slightly humid, although the office interior remained at a comfortable 21 °C. Bouchard's shirt had been a nice, cool gray, which complemented the silver of his eyes. Jon (who had been busy digging for his favorite pen (the ink was a lovely deep green color, and it was usually kept on the left side of the top desk drawer, and Jon had no idea where else it could have possibly gone)) had settled on "irritation" as his tone, which Bouchard either had not noticed or had not cared enough to acknowledge. He had easily dominated the conversation, and Jon could admit in the sanctity of his research journal that his voice had been soothing enough to cool away some of Jon's annoyance. He wrote his conclusion: Subject behaved near-identically in tone, posture, body language, and apparent mood as he has in all previous communications. Subject displayed no strong thoughts or opinions on subject of discussion nor conversational partner. Interaction was pleasant but slightly dull, no new information discovered. It was almost exactly the same as every previous conclusion. Jon had to admit, so many months with so little progress was… discouraging. He shifted on the narrow mattress and winced when his movements aggravated his backache (which was surely unrelated to his frequent occupancy of the cot). It was becoming more and more apparent that the only possible solution was to do some actual, direct investigation. His first idea (break into Bouchard's office) seemed a tad far (also, he didn't know how to pick locks). His second idea (follow him home) seemed a stretch further than the previous one, and was perhaps best saved as a last resort. His third idea (something something computers? (perhaps "idea" was a bit generous)) would almost certainly require Sasha, who would have questions Jon couldn't answer. He flipped idly through his notes, half-skimming, half-thinking. It was only when his gaze landed on figure 2.b, Weekly Schedule of E. Bouchard, that he actually came up with something reasonable. Something actionable.

[timey-fandom-stuff]

"Not every window is a door, but most doors have windows." "Don't tap on the glass. You might not like what happens next."

this is Kris the Kriptid, an AU Kris Dreemurr that may or may not be trying to inspire their own creepypasta. they think they're the scariest glitch entity to ever appear on a player's screen-- but they also think that accidentally setting off the smoke detector by burning toast when they were 10 qualifies them as an arsonist, so take that with a grain of salt. don't be fooled; they are still Kris under all that edge.

here they're singing the refrain from Cabinet Man by Lemon Demon for some funky composition practice; it just felt right for this menace and may or may not hint a LITTLE at what sort of wacky game-breaking nonsense I've got up my sleeve with Jailbroken, shhh

[the-carlos-cow-eyes]

Okay, let's be real, y'all:

[dandyshucks]

blinks tiredly. i decide "hm maybe i should try to expand my circle and step outside of it a little, lets go look at the main community tags" and im just greeted with a bunch of edgelords who think saying "fiction doesn't affect reality, don't like don't read" is peak activism and "fighting censorship". head in my hands. this is partially why i do not ever go into the community tags, my nervous system cannot handle blocking fifty weirdos every single day just so i can have a normal experience in the community tags hfdsjkl

[idolbound]

So getting to see a Chantry in [redacted] in Veilguard has confirmed that they can have basements and other storage rooms, etc., that people don't frequent, and therefore, confirms my headcanon of how Meredith has definitely had her illicit hook ups with various women of the Chantry over the years in those rooms, away from prying eyes.

Meredith has lived nearly her entire life in The Gallows. When she was a Knight-Templar, she was limited in how often she could leave her post (and even then, only really had the free opportunity to go to the Chantry daily for prayer), so her only outlet was to seek out connections among Chantry Sisters (or as she got older, a Chantry Mother or two) over the years. When she became Knight-Captain, she had more power and ability to maintain some casual relationships here and there but always in secret. While not doing this as often after becoming Knight-Commander (and therefore, having much more power to do as she pleases), she still has a few 'old flames' who she may meet up with now and again, even as her life is devoted to the Order; her hypersexuality and behaviour of seeking sex as a replacement for social interaction outside of work demands it (Though that isn't to say she can't develop intimate relationships outside of this arrangement, but it's rare and must remain just as private as the late night trysts do).

I've talked about this before, but marriage among Templars is rare, and requires special permission (provided that the aforementioned non-templar partner is able to sustain themselves, should the templar be relocated to a new post elsewhere). Marriage in Thedas for the most part is seen as a means of procreation rather than love necessarily, and so for a templar to marry in a same-sex partnership would be a rarity, and one Meredith could never see herself pursuing. Pair this fear of ostracization with her hypersexuality as mentioned above, this form of religious repression is quite prominent for Meredith.

That said, her high level of sexual desire and sex drive has enabled this sex-seeking behaviour over the years, and the Chantry certainly serves not only as just a place of worship, but as a place to allow herself sexual freedom (with obvious limitations).

** In the cases with people of their own influence/power of their own accord (e.g., with @sanctamater 's Lady Amelia Comstock, or @thesxmmersword 's Ser Cauthrien), who have homes outside of the Gallows or Chantry have allowed for relationships to develop behind closed doors, though those must remain private and kept out of the spotlight as Meredith's duty to the Order will always come first, even at the detriment of those longer-term relationships / feelings of love.

[uniiiquehecrt]

https://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/story/chris-hemsworth-cover-story

It's like the Prequels again. Everyone blamed the actors when it's the director who deserves the blame.

OKAY BUT REAL TALK I ACTUALLY JUST READ THIS WHOLE ARTICLE BEFORE CHECKING MY BLOG RIGHT NOW AND I JUST NEED TO SAY THAT CHRIS BEING SO DOWN AND OUT ABOUT HIS ROLE IN THE MCU IS SO SAD TO ME.

Now that I've gotten that out of the way: to put my full thoughts into words... I want to say first that Robert Downey Jr. has this to say about Chris (in response to Chris feeling like he's not as important or as cool as the other heroes):

"Thor as a character was super tricky to adapt [...] but he and Ken Branagh figured out how to transcend, make him somehow relatable but godlike. Hemsworth is, in my opinion, the most complex psyche out of all of us Avengers. He's got wit and gravitas, but also such restraint, fire, and gentleness."

And this is SO true. He took the words out of my mouth.

Reading the article.. and how and where Chris notes feelings of inadequacy, or feeling he's complaining to much (and therefore being narcissistic by complaining), the burning himself out, etc. Suffice it to say I was struck by one thing in particular: There's a lot of Chris in Thor. A LOT of Chris in Thor. It's not a surprise to me, in that case, that he felt down and out about his role in the Avengers, and the MCU as a whole when Thor is, inherently, consequently, alien. But alien in the sense of being SO important, SO regal, so otherworldly in sheer scope and in depth that where he fit in was ... quite simply grander than the others in the overall scheme of things.

It was the Asgardians who brought the Tesseract to Earth and safeguarded it, and the Aether. Two entire infinity stones within their protection. That, is Thor. Who was the one to have a vision about the role of the infinity stones? Thor in "Avengers: Age of Ultron". Who was the one to bring the Vision to life? Thor, also in "Avengers: Age of Ultron". Who was the one to realize as far back as "The Avengers" (2012) that someone was working behind Loki? It was still Thor.

And what I find most interesting is that Chris isn't exactly wrong about what he says here:

"Sometimes I felt like the security guard for the team," he says. "I would read everyone else's lines, and go, Oh, they got way cooler stuff. They're having more fun. What's my character doing? It was always about, 'You've got the wig on. You've got the muscles. You've got the costume. Where's the lightning?' Yeah I'm part of this big thing, but I'm probably pretty replaceable."

Ignoring for a moment that this is absolutely not at ALL the truth, it's not a surprise to me that he felt this way for... particular people and branches within the overarching fandom spaces I won't name for the sanctity of this post. And it is unendingly sad to me to have undeniable proof from the horse's mouth that Chris lost sight of how much depth and beauty he brought to the table as Thor. And how important Thor is as a result.

And yet, I honestly don't blame him FOR losing sight of that. There's a lot he had to - and still has to - contend with. And almost everybody sleeps on his portrayal of Thor in particular. It's depressing to see.

RDJ saying he's got the most complex psyche is so true. Gentle and gravitas, restrained but filled with fire. I love that about Thor. I will always love that about Thor.

I genuinely hope, with Chris seemingly realizing just how far out of touch he fell whilst chasing the high that Taika Waititi's dipshit behavior allowed him to chase, that he does do better. Performs better. But I mean that more in the sense of...

Chris, should you ever happen to read even a small part of this: I hope that you fall back in love with Thor. And I hope you see how lovely he is - and has always been - specifically because of your portrayal of him. You and Thor are not replaceable. You're not boring. At no point have you ever been. And I hope for your last foray into Thor's franchise you get to feel the energy you did when you first put on the costume in the first place. When the costume came on, and it felt like it just fit, and you were transformed into the character entirely. I hope your final goodbye to Thor is filled with all of the love that you first welcomed his part to play with; for you and for all of us.

– and sappiness aside, genuinely, I really do hope that Thor 5 can be a film that Chris feels proud to be a part of. A note he's proud to end on. He deserves it; we all do.

[r0semultiverse]

I don’t know, me personally, I just think two adults playing pretend & pretending being gross together with full open communication & consent between them is harmless, but maybe that’s just me.

[liesmyth]

the unholy union Alecto and John have going on is obviously delicious and terrifying and they're going to wreck the universe as they wreck each other but you know what else is sexy? The absolute horror potential of early days just-a-guy John getting Like That, and nobody around him, even John himself, have a single clue what's going on.

They've studied their whole lives, they think they know things. How bodies work. What the limits of science are. Conservation of energy. And then they're confronted with the realisation that they actually don't know shit. The universe is not how they thought. Reality is not what they though. Death is not what they thought. Absolutely fucking terrifying

[bigmeansweatydyke]

the long-ago aforementioned cool bi girl turned wannabe cathtradwife friend is currently getting flamed on facebook by friend and acquaintances. karma's a bitch ya shoulda known betta

[bugmistake]

my birthday is in less than a week i literally feel like im gonna barf. what the hell and also fuck in addition to that as well.

[byanyan]

while a lot of people find enclosed, confined spaces claustrophobic, byan actually finds they feel very safe and comforted in such places. maybe not for extended periods of time or anything, but when it comes to sleeping or taking a bit of time to calm down? they're perfect. especially on those days where they're experiencing hypervigilance, when there's something relieving about knowing that there's no one else with them and knowing that there's only one point of entry — if someone's going to attack them, they know where it'll be coming from.

it's not all that uncommon to find them napping in closets or, to a lesser extent, under beds, or even inside large cupboards if there's enough space. it's been a habit since they were a child, although they couldn't tell you exactly when it started.