#they’ve all quietly agreed is always going to have to be monitored and taken care of

[cloneboywonder]

im so CWCcoded

[1shot-wonder]

Soft For You (Mafia!Aizawax GN!Reader

Kicking off my blog with ol reliable-the mafia AU.

Description- Aizawa Shota is one of the most feared crime bosses in Japan. Working quietly in the shadows, he has dedicated his life to the underground. But his new partner has helped him find a little light in all of this darkness. While anyone on the outside can see how much more progress he has made, some of his people aren’t so thrilled with the new addition.

Warnings- mafia, implied past abusive relationship (just a few vague sentences), mentions of death, killing. Slight language warning 

In spite of ^that this is actually just fluff with a half-formed plot to encourage more fluff. Story under the cut

"Aizawa, sir." Shota looked up as his right hand came in.

"Yamada. What do you need?"

"We have gotten word that Shigaraki has been spotted trying to cross the border." Shota raised an eyebrow and you looked up from your paperwork.

"Do we know why?"

"He seems to be attempting to make contact with Dabi." Shota nodded.

"I see. Let him cross, but send Bakugou to monitor him. If he thinks anything is up, he may act as he sees fit."

"Understood." Yamada bowed. "That's all. Do you need anything from me?"

"No." Yamada nodded and left the office after offering you a small wave.

"Are you sure Bakugou is the best choice?" You asked quietly. "He's a little...over eager."

"He's trigger happy and reckless." Shota agreed. "That's the point. I want to see how he'll handle the situation. It's a test." You nodded slowly. "Shigaraki is not a good man, Y/N. The world would be better off without him."

"I know." You sighed. Shota tutted and held out his hands.

"Come here." You walked over and he gently pulled you into his lap. "I know this life is difficult at first. But I do not enjoy taking lives and I will not take them needlessly." You nodded.

"I just need time." He hummed and kissed your forehead gently.

"I love you." He murmured. "I love you more than life itself. I would burn the world down for you. If you asked it I would put an end to the mob forever."

"I know. I wouldn't ask that of you, Shota. I fell in love with you, and this is who you are." You promised.

"Is there something you want. You've been acting like you wanted to speak with me for a while."

"I...I was thinking I might visit my family?" It came out like a question and Shota frowned.

"Alright. I don't have anywhere I need to be so the plane is yours." He hated when you asked for things like this. The little reminders that you had not always been his, that those who had you before did not care for you as you deserved. "When would you want to go?"

"Well...I was wondering if you would come with me." Shota hesitated. He had only met your family once and it had been...less than ideal. They were suspicious. Almost accusatory. "I know things didn't go well last time, but I figured we could try again? Give them a chance to really talk to you? If it doesn't work out I'll go on my own from now on. They're protective. They know how...he was. They just want me safe." He sighed.

"Very well. I will see when I am available." The smile he received reminded him why he did anything anymore. It was all for you.

"Thank you, Sho. You're the best." He smiled and kissed your nose.

"No need to thank me. Although if you want to go home at all tonight I do need to have access to my desk." You hummed. Then you maneuvered to pull his chair back to his desk before nuzzling into his neck. "So needy." You just hummed. He wrapped an arm around your waist and got to work.

-----

"I told you." Hawks hissed at his fellow guard. The pair had been listening in on Shota's office for weeks. "He's going soft. And they’re too soft for this."

"I don't know what you're suggesting but you should get it out of your head now." King ordered. "I agreed to help you because I was suspicious of their loyalties. They’ve proven themselves, so I'm done."

"He hasn't taken time off in four years!"

"That's not a good thing!" King hissed. "The boss needs something good, Hawks. It is possible to get too deep into this life. He was getting reckless before they showed up and you know it. Now I'm done. If you come up with some suicidal plan, I better not hear about it or I will turn you in."

"Coward."

"I'm not the one considering overthrowing a man who saved my life because he's changed for the better." Vlad glanced over his shoulder. "Let it go, Hawks."

----

"Good morning Hawks." You hummed. You had been waiting for this. You'd noticed the dirty looks. The mutters. The man was far from subtle.

"Good morning Y/N." You turned around to face him. He'd caught you in the gym. You liked to go in the morning before anyone was there to watch you (it also gave you an excuse to nap in Shota's office). "I heard you and Eraser are going on vacation."

"Yes. We're going to visit my parents."

"How sweet." He walked over and leaned on the treadmill next to yours. "It's been a while since he took a vacation."

"Four years." You nodded. "He overworks himself. I think it'll be good for him."

"And what about us?"

"We both trust Yamada." You shrugged. "I don't feel any need to worry. We can be back here in less than a day if there is an emergency." You recited.

"You don't feel the need to worry?" He repeated.

"No. Neither does Shota." You told him.

"Oh? And he told you that." You finally turned off your machine to glare at him.

"Let's be clear Hawks. I may not be as bloodthirsty as some of the people here, but I am still Shota's partner. I don't like the way you're talking to me. And don't forget. There was a time when you wanted to be the one in my bed." You reminded him with a whisper. "How do you think Shota would feel about that bit of news, hmm?" It had still been fairly early in your relationship. You hadn't even known the truth about Shota yet. It was only eight months previous that he told you that, and your second anniversary was fast approaching. The two of you met at a local coffee shop and you had been immediately smitten. He took you to an event for one of the cover businesses he had. Many other members were there, including Hawks. Hawks had followed you when you went to the bathroom and made a pass at you. You had never said a word about it to anyone, only leaving him with a sore wrist and the message that you were not as weak as he believed.

"Are you just playing with him?" He hissed. "He thinks you're this sweet, angelic thing when in reality you're just as dark as the rest of us."

"Shota knows exactly who I am. Better than you do." You hissed. "Now, if you don't mind, I have to go pack. Good day."

----

"Are you alright?" Shota frowned at you as he watched you shove your clothes into a suitcase. "Did your wardrobe do something to offend you?" You sighed.

"If I tell you, do you promise to react like a boyfriend and not like a mob boss?" He narrowed his eyes.

"Are you hurt?"

"No. Just pissed off." He sighed.

"Then fine. I promise." You nodded and sat on the bed.

"Hawks still doesn't like me." You complained. "He found me in the gym today and started grilling me about the trip. He's not happy that you're going." Shota walked over and pressed a kiss to your head.

"I'm sorry, my love. I wish there was something I could do, but people will always question you here, even if I send you on a thousand missions." You had been on a handful in the past eight months since you had been brought into the fold. They had all been completely successful and you had done your job well. But it wasn't enough for everyone.

"I know. I just- everyone else at least keeps their muttering to themselves. I don't know why he hates me so much."

"Hawks is proud. It's possible you did something to injure his fragile ego. I can speak with him if you like."

"You promised."

"And I intend to keep it. But as your boyfriend I want to offer solutions to your problems." You huffed.

"No. It's- it's fine. I'll get over it."

"Alright. The offer is on the table if you need it."

----

Things were going...well, they could be worse. Your family seemed more receptive to Shota than they had been last time. You did seem very happy with him, even if there was something unusual about the man. You were all watching a movie when his phone went off. He glanced at it and immediately sat up.

"I'll be right back."

"Is everything okay?" You asked him worriedly.

"Everything is fine. Zashi just needs some advice on an investment deal." You nodded and sank back into the couch while he stalked out of the room and called his friend.

"Where?"

"So far I've got four. One in each outlet, one on the bookshelf, and one under the desk. They're low range, harder to detect. But that means there were more of them to hear the whole room." Shota cursed. "We'll do our best to trace them on our end. And before you say it, don't even think about coming back here. You've only got two days left, we can handle things until then."

"Zashi, we could be compromised." He protested. "They know I'm here, they could be planning an attack at any moment. No one got in without inside help. We have a mole."

"Exactly. And everyone who knows you would expect you to fly back right away. We'll tell the team that we found them, see if we can trip them up. You and Y/N needed this vacation. You have to start having faith in us, Sho, or you're going to run yourself into the ground." Shota bit his lip.

"Zashi, they practically live in my office. It's ours at this point they do all of their work in there. I thought no one outside of us knew about them. If they’re in danger..."

"You won't let anything happen to them."

"You're right. Okay. I'll wait. But keep me updated."

"Of course."

"Okay. Spill." You demanded. Shota had returned to the movie without a word and your family seemed convinced that everything was fine, but you knew better. He sighed.

"You can't freak out."

"Great way to start." You quipped.

"Y/N! This is- this is serious." He sighed. "They found bugs in my office."

"What?" You froze. "In the-" he nodded. "Fuck. Any leads?"

"Not yet. Zashi's working on it." He dropped his head into his hands. "I don't even- we've had a mole for who knows how long and I had no idea."

"You can't blame yourself, Sho. You'll deal with it. I know you will." He nodded slowly.

"I promised we would stay here as planned." He said at last. "He made a good point. Whoever is behind this will expect us to come back if they know they're found." You nodded. "I'm sorry. I wish you didn't have to worry about this."

"Shota. We are partners. We carry these burdens together." He hummed and leaned into your embrace. "I love you."

"And I you."

"Come on. Let's get some rest."

----

"Sir?" Shota looked up sharply. The two of you had returned to the base just a few hours ago and he was looking through the work Hizashi had done. You had gone back to your bedroom with Hizashi, knowing this was something Shota wanted to do himself.

"King. This had better be important." The man stepped more fully into the room.

"Yes sir. I- I know who planted the bugs." Shota sat up. The door snapped shut and King stood before his leader.

"Speak."

"The bugs were planted...by Hawks and myself." Shota went very still.

"Oh?"

"Yes sir. Hawks...he got into my head a little. But that is no excuse. I was...hesitant of Y/N's inclusion. Suspicious of their loyalties. So when Hawks told me he wanted to implant the bugs, I...I agreed. I deluded myself into thinking I was doing what was best for us all."

"And why are you coming forward and not Hawks?"

"We...came to different conclusions. I was satisfied. Guilty, even. I stopped working with Hawks. I tried to convince him as well. He...he did not have any concrete plans, but- he was angry with how you have changed."

"I see. And how long have these bugs been planted?"

"Since shortly after their arrival, sir."

"I see. And how long did it take for you to be satisfied?"

"I- I only walked away last week, sir. The day you decided to visit their family." Shota nodded slowly.

"Well. We find ourselves in quite the predicament, don't we?" He asked. "You questioned my judgement and authority. Spied on me. Conspired with another. And continued to conceal this from me even after defecting. However. You have come forward, and Y/N likes you despite your suspicions. So... I will spare you. For now." He glared. "But if I even think you are questioning me again, I will use your blood to paint my walls. Do you understand?"

"Yes sir."

"Good. Now go. I'll talk to Hizashi about finding you a new position. And do not go within ten feet of Y/N if you value your extremities." He nodded and hurried out the door. Hizashi entered a minute later.

"You've got something?"

"King just confessed. He and Hawks planted them to monitor how Y/N was affecting my decisions."

"And he's still alive?"

"King is a great asset to us, and he did come forward in the end. I'll find a new position for him, but I don't feel the need to kill him just yet." Hizashi nodded. Shota had always been more resistant to blood shed than others in the trade, and King was a valuable piece. "Now. As for Hawks. I am not so inclined to have mercy on him." Hizashi nodded. "King believes he may have been discontent enough to act."

"Should I get him now?"

"No. Make him think he is safe a little longer." Shota ordered. "I need time to think. By the way, who is watching Y/N?"

"Midnight and Endeavour." Shota nodded. "You should go talk to them."

"Yes. Yes, I will." He suddenly remembered the conversation the two of you had before you left. He quickly made his way through the compound to your bedroom. Midnight and Endeavour stepped aside. You were still unpacking, but Shota could tell that you were distracted. You looked up quickly when he came in.

"Did you find them?" He nodded and dismissed your guards before closing the door.

"King came forward. He and Hawks planted the bugs when I brought you in." You deflated.

"Me?"

"King has been spared due to his honesty. He is being demoted." You nodded.

"And...Hawks?"

"I haven't entirely decided yet. My instinct is to kill him, but I don't know if that's what would be best." You hummed. "Do you...have an opinion?"

"I- I've never wanted someone dead." You said haltingly. "Not even my ex." He nodded. "But there's something about Hawks...I- I feel like he's a danger to you, and that bothers me."

"I am perfectly safe." He promised you gently.

"I know that. Logically." You sighed and pulled your knees up to your chest.

"I don't know how it would fair. Hawks is very popular. And I don't know how far he's been spreading these ideas. And it is technically his first moment of insubordination." He sighed. "I'll have him imprisoned for now until I make a decision." You nodded. "The good news is there was no indication that he'd shared the information outside of us yet. You should be safe."

"We should be safe." You corrected. "Now help me unpack."

-----

"So he sold me out, huh?" Hawks scoffed. Aizawa stayed silent outside of the cell. "Bastard."

"Were you working with anyone else?" Shota asked.

"What?"

"Did you give the recordings to anyone else?"

"No. Not yet. It's stored off site." Shota nodded.

"Did you move it after Vlad defected?"

"Haven't had the chance." Shota nodded again. "So what's it gonna be? Firing squad? You gonna drop me in enemy territory?"

"I haven't decided what I'm going to do with you yet." Shota admitted.

"You're not considering keeping me around? After I've been spying on your for eight months?" Hawks scoffed. "I knew that toy of yours was making you soft."

"Do not speak of Y/N." Shota growled. "You have always been brash, Hawks. If I were to kill you now without knowing how much power you have, I could put everyone in danger. Right now, you're worth more to me here. In this cell."

"So what are the options? You kill me, or I get to go on my merry way."

"You want to get caught." Shota realized. "That's why you picked King. You knew he would crack. You're trying to make a point." Hawks smirked.

"That's right. Either kill me- as you should- and risk upsetting your precious darling. Or let me live and look weak." Shota scoffed.

"Not everyone is as...inconsistent as you, Hawks. The people here trust me to do my job and do it well. If- and chances are decreasing rapidly- if I were to let you live, they would trust me. You would not be welcomed back into the fold the way you seem to believe. You would be here for a very long time. If you were especially cooperative, I might consider making you into an errand boy." Hawks scoffed.

"I'm the best fighter you have."

"You will never be trusted with the safety of anyone in this compound again." Shota told him. "That I can promise you."

"Sir." He turned. Endeavour was at the end of the hall. "Y/N believes they have some information pertinent to the upcoming raid."

"I'll be with them momentarily."

"Oh, you're having them do prep for raids now?" Hawks asked.

"They are my partner. If things go as I wish they will one day have as much power here as I do." Hawks snorted.

"A co-head?"

"Of course. Why else do you think I told them about all of this?"

"That's way too much work in my opinion. I can't believe I ever thought they were worth my time." Shota glared and grabbed Hawks by the collar.

"What does that mean?"

"Oh! They never told you?" Hawks purred. "Your precious Y/N is keeping secrets are they?" Shota snarled and tossed the man away.

"You will not make me doubt them."

"Are you sure about that?"

-----

"What happened with Hawks?" Shota asked as soon as he came into the office.

"What?"

"Something happened with Hawks. Something you never told me. What?" You stared at him for a minute.

"Are you...jealous?"

"No! I am...confused as to why you wouldn't tell me if something happened."

"Shota. It was ages ago. At the first event you ever took me too, before I even learned about all this. I went to the bathroom. Hawks followed me and tried to make a pass at me as I was going back to the main room. That's all. I gave him some bruises on his wrist for his trouble and moved on. I didn't want to bring it up when it happened because...well, I was worried you'd react like him. And then I just never thought it was a big deal."

"He tried to touch you? While we were dating?" You shrugged. "How could that not be considered a big deal?"

"I am not your property Shota. It was me he violated, and I dealt with it." He took a deep breath.

"You're right. I'm sorry." You nodded.

"You're forgiven. Have you decided yet?"

"I'm even more confused than I was." You nodded.

"Want to talk through it with me?"

"Later. For now I just want to sit with you."

"Then get over here."

[nestasgalpal]

The art of antagonism

Fixing ACOSF part 7

Masterlist | AO3

Summary: It’s Starfall, the most beautiful night of the year in the Night Court. Nesta is with her friends, dancing with them, and not even his unexpected appearence will ruin it.

A/N: I AM SORRY IT TOOK ME MONTHS. I got a job and didn’t have that much time. There was so much these two needed to discuss... and there is more coming in the next chapters (WHICH I HAVE DRAFTED BECAUSE THEY WERE SO MUCH EASIER TO WRITE THAN THIS ONE). Anyway, here is the next part of Fixing A Court of Gaslighting.

Tagging:  @gwynriel​ @zoyaslai​ @clolikescloquetas​ @amelievrstr​  @t8astr8ng @wanderlustlastsforever @saltydreamcollector​ @lordlorcan​ @esrahiba​ @queenestarcheron​  @jemstan300​ @nessiantrashh​ @azrielandhawkesropebunny  @frosted-crackers  @mireillemystique​ @pataytayo​ @968sunflower968​ @caram267​ @jainadurron​ @darkshadowqueensrule​ @amphiptree @finae-bookshelf​ @niytavia​ @brainlessfruit​ @dontgetsalmonella​ @messyhairday-me​ @sunsummoner​  @chosenfamily-valkyriequeens​ @wannawriteyouabook​ @psychoticminx​ @misswonderflower​  @drielecarla​ ​

The night was even more beautiful now that Nesta laid on the cold grass, Gwyn dancing nearby with her feet bare. Stars rained over them.

The training yards on the rooftop took most of the space, but there was enough room for the three of them to lay on the soft grass that started to grow with the early spring weather. Emerie was not with them yet. Her sister said Azriel would go sought her, but it was taking him a little longer than she had anticipated. 

Gwyn sang. She did so quietly enough that Nesta only grasped some of it, the soft melody flowing between them. Her friend literally glowed covered in stardust, like a goddess who looked down to the city of light and shone for its citizens. Her presence there -out of the library at night- a blessing to them.

Nesta got up from her mat and joined the improvised dance to the rythm of Gwyn’s light mutter. Nesta made her twirl and then catched her in her arms, laughing at how clumpsy the manuver came out. Gwyn laughed too, and Nesta knew she had made the right decision when she left Feyre’s party.

She wanted to spend her first Starfall -the first Starfall she would remember- with her new friends.

Stars zoomed in the sky, fast and beautiful. Nesta let Gwyn spin her and then take her hand, the other one now resting in the priestess shoulder. They moved together in harmony, not performing the choreography or any real dance she knew, yet swinging with grace.

Then, Emerie arrived. Only it was not Az who brought her to them, but Rhysand.

Nesta’s joy vanished in a heartbeat. What was he doing here? Emerie run to them. She looked unharmed, smiling as she approached and waving her hand with excitement. Nesta walked past her, straight to Rhysand.

“Feyre asked me to bring her here” he explained before Nesta said a word.

“Did she?” not a single syllable was free of poison and distrust.  She knew it was a lie, her sister hadn’t asked him.

The High Lord didn’t try to deny the silent accusation. Because he didn’t really care that she knew it had been his idea -that he had asked Feyre to be the one bringing Emerie to Velaris, and she had agreed. He wanted Nesta to know that after the last fight with his mate, he had been forgiven, and her sister trusted him blindly again.

Silence didn’t have time to settle between them before Nesta found the strength in herself to answer to his silent jibe with just as much pettiness. “Well, that’s good. For a moment I thought you were here to join us. And you know, we usually don’t accept new members when they’ve threatened the life of one of us.” Nesta shrugged, her face not showing a pinch of the bad blood she felt. Her eyes did that for her, as did Rhysand’s in return.

“I already apologized for that” was all he said. Yes, he had apologized to Feyre. And to Cassian, who had been comfortably talking to him in the balcony.

But not to her. The one whose life he had threatened. He didn’t think he had to. And nobody expected him to do so either, apparently.

Facing him wasn’t something she had anticipated for tonight. She didn’t feel prepared at all.

Learning to respect herself enough to keep going with her life was not an easy path, and her sister’s mate was still the biggest obstacle she would have to face after she came to terms with herself.

Not tonight, please. Not now.

Rhysand had threatened her multiple times. And he hadn’t apologized to her once. It wasn’t fair. That much, she knew. In theory, this should be easy -facing him and demanding respect. But in practice it wasn’t. Nesta found herself struggling to keep control of her emotions, her anger, her guiltiness. There was a learned habit of believing his words to be true because everyone else seemed to agree with him and it was either accepting them as well, or be left alone to stand against him.

He had the same confident grin he had worn the day Feyre sent her here. That disgusting grim Nesta dreaded. She knew that if he had tried to look only a little more intimidating, she would have fallen back in line, accepting that she was still his prisoner in The House of Wind, a building she couldn’t escape from. But the way his confident eyes looked down on her made the mist in her mind vanish, her rage rising up like a shield -her old reliable walls.

She was done with being the only one who was held accountable for her mistakes.

A high-pitched laugh came from where Gwyn and Emerie were sharing a welcome hug. Only a few little lanterns on the floor lightened up the space, stars doing the rest.

They oozed joy as Nesta turned her back to them to face her sister’s mate again. She wanted to join her friends, but had to do this first. Because Nesta had endured too much already, and wasn’t willing to let this male ruin the most beautiful night of the year for her. She was determined to have fun with her Valkyrie sisters, so if Rhysand wanted trouble, he would have to wait.

They would have a confrontation another time, and it would be on her terms.

“You should go back to your party. You have guests.”

The High Lord nodded. His semblance was relaxed, comfortable. In control. “You do too. Though it looks like you are missing one. Do you want me to bring Elain up here as well?” Nesta fought the impulse to tighten her jaw and fists. She made herself breathe through the anger and keep her mien blank. “Get one sister, loose the other, I guess”. He shifted on his feet, his hands now in his pockets, the image of a confident male. He waved his hand to her friends behind her, a smile on his lips that didn’t meet his eyes. “I’ll never forget Elain’s tears when she came back from visiting you that last time”.

“And I’ll never care about what you think of that.”

Nesta tried to make her words heavy with venom. Unmoving stone against his constant pushing. She intended for them to sound like a final statement. But truth can’t always be bent like that, sometimes it flungs free. Against her will, her voice was light, syllables one after the other coming out of her mouth as naturally as breathing.

Not cold, not welcoming or tinted with any hue of sentiment at all. Her words were a simple and transparent truth: She didn’t care what he said, what he thought of her or what he did. She never would, no matter how many traps and punishments Rhysand devised for her, or how strong his High Lord abilities affected her psyche. There was no room inside her left to care about this male in front of her anymore. Specially, not now.

Because he would never change who he was, or how far he was willing to go to see his goals materialize. Nesta was beyond caring, anyway. Beyond trying to earn his pardon.

Nesta told herself she was the master of her own fate, as her sisters and every other person in her live controlled their own. She repeated the words like a mantra, an exercise to convince herself and keep her cool. Whatever I want, I can work for it with or without his approval.

Nesta took in the image presented in front of her. The delicate embroidery of his tunic, the carefully styled hair. The overall perfection of his appearance. And concluded that he wasn’t worth the effort of coming up with witty insults. He simply needed to leave her party and go back to his own.

“You’ve made your loved ones cry a fair amount as well, and they found a way to forgive you. If what you’ve done to others can be excused, then I’m sure my sisters and I will find a way to work things out as well. We are long-lasting creatures now, We are in no hurry.”

As his only answer, Rhysand fixed his gaze behind her again and smiled, a wicked grin darkening his beautiful features. Emerie’s burst of laughter echoed in the rooftop. He kept his stare there. Nesta could almost hear his brain at work, but didn’t get a clear reading of his thoughts.

There was a weird feeling about his presence there, the way he kept looking at the illyrian and the priestess. He was monitoring them, as if making sure they were okay. That’s when it clicked -the reason why her sister’s mate had insisted on winnowing Emerie himself. He didn’t travel all the way to Illyria to provoke her, he was actually making sure Nesta wasn’t a threat to her friend’s safety.

He had already warned her once about that on that same spot of the House of Wind.

Why did he insist on making of Nesta such a monster in his mind?

The only reason she even met her Valkyrie sisters was him locking her in that damned house carved in the mountain. It had been his idea to make her work in the library with the priestess. It had been an order of his that she went to Windhaven to train. Why did he insist of making a threat of her even when he was the one moving her around and controlling her every movement?

“Haven’t you taken enough from me already?” she asked when the silence became too much, anger rising in her stomach and burning all the way up to her throat.

She really needed to know. Because as days went on, she started questioning what did her sister’s mate even expect from her. To what end had he engined this plan? What did he want from her before he let her out? That’s if he ever intended to do so...

Does he only want to see my spirit broken?

Nesta was well aware of how her choices had hurt Feyre. Cassian. Even Elain. But what had she even done to him? Why did he go around pretending her life and her future belonged to him so fiercely she had almost believed it as well? Why was he so convinced of his entitlement to grant her a pardon or not, even when the rest had already made peace with her?

That, she didn’t understand. That was precisely what made her shake and be scared of the future. That she didn’t know. That she didn’t know if the rest did either. That they saw and heard him act like that... and didn’t say anything.

That was what made her fall and fall again under his power. Whenever she felt like his treatment was unfair, she looked around and realized she was the only one who had a problem with it. She doubted herself, how reliable her own judgement was.

But she had to come out of that darkness.

She had to, or else she would really crumple up and perish once and for all.

When Rhysand looked back at her, he scanned her features as if she were a puzzle, a mystery. His own personal challenge that didn’t exist beyond his own perception. A hint of pity shone for a second in his pupils, then disappeared as if it had never been there.

“Don’t you think you deserved some of it?” he asked back. When Nesta didn’t answer, he decided to explain it to her with the condescension only those who didn’t belong to his circle knew from him. “You don’t even know how deeply your actions have hurt her. How much damage you have caused.” Rhysand gave a step closer. Nesta didn’t back down. “She keeps forgiving you because she’s already imagined what her life looks like with you by her side and wants it desperately. You prey on her innocence -on her unconditional love. You take advantage of it and fail her time after time.” The High Lord was gritting his teeth “Yet she keeps coming back to you. I refuse to allow this behavior from you anymore. I must put an end to it before you drag her down with you to that well you seem unable to escape. If you want to be miserable, so be it. But I won’t allow you to ruin my mate as well.”

Oh.

So that’s it.

It hurt. It hurt way more than she could have anticipated. Nesta had spent countless hours looking between her memories for the most painful ones. For those times when she had been so awful there was no room for redemption. She had been the first one to use them against herself in those long nights of self-loathing. Nesta had gone over and over those times when she picked on her sisters, she had memorized every insult thrown at them until the words lost their meaning and no longer could be used to hurt herself.

Nesta thought nobody could use that against her better than she already did and make her hate who she was more than she ever did. So it hurt to listen to Rhysand and understand what was hidden behind his words. There was an underlying truth that she had never even considered. A new layer to the High Lord’s character that she had never known. Yet suddenly, it all made sense.

And it hurt.

It hurt to realize that Rhysand wouldn’t stop trying to keep her away from Feyre because he was jealous. He was jealous that it didn’t matter what he gave her -a crown, a court, the world itself... Feyre wouldn’t have the life she wanted until she had her sister by her side to enjoy it. It almost made her laugh, hadn’t it been the cause for almost a year of missery.

It was sad and pathetic to realize this male was using every weapon at his disposal to ruin her because of his own insecurity, his own fear of not being enough.

She had been suffering this nightmare for him. For his ego.

“I did kind of deserve this” she answered with honesty, her arms spreading at her sides to point at the space. Her open sky prison. “The first time a High Lord used a fake law to manipulate me and my family to his will, I was unprepared. But this second time, I kind of deserved it. I should have known.”

Rhysand’s eyes widened as she spoke, but Nesta wasn’t finished yet “Do you get like a manual, or something, when you sit on the throne? How to trick stupid girls into giving up their freedom? How to keep them quiet when they refuse?” she mocked.

His eyes were voids of blackness that seemed to swallow her, his dark essence flinging free around them. To say his performance was a threat would be a stretch. It wasn’t a threat, it was the preparation for an attack. The scent of his anger hit her senses and almost knocked her out, a death promise painted in his fine features.

Don’t you ever compare me to him, he growled in her mind.

But Nesta had faced death too many times to be scared of it anymore.

She took a step closer as a savage grin formed in her lips. Unafraid. Because she was sure his threats would become true, and the thought of it made her shiver. But so would hers, if the male in front of her even considered hurting Feyre, her friends of Nesta herself again. “Then stop doing the same shit he did”.

Her words came out as a whisper, soft in the way a lion’s fur was to the touch. A softness that didn’t make its jaws even slightly less dangerous when it prayed upon its victim.

And they hit their mark.

Rhysand’s hands were fists

Nesta was already preparing her next jibe. She wanted him to leave, to stay away from her. But if he refused, then she was ready to fight him to filth. To make him see for himself how hard it was to make peace with everything she needed to mend, every person she had hurt, when he kept going after her for the fun of it. She would make him go through it if that was the only option he left her.

But when Nesta met his gaze, she thought she saw a kind of hurt deep in his pupils so familiar that she wondered if the black in his eyes was only reflecting her own. “I only want to protect my mate” he said at last, his eyes endlessly tired now. She would have pitied him. Had he ever granted Nesta a little consideration before dismissing her as a monster, as a threat, as the cause of every single inconvenience in their lives, she would have pitied him. It wasn’t the case.

“Then go sought her, and leave me alone.” 

He did. Without any last comment to torment her evening, without a last threatening glare to let her know that she had won this fight, but not the war, Rhysand went for the stairs, and got lost in the darkness.

Nesta gave a step back, not wanting to turn her back to the stairs... just in case. Only when she made sure her sister’s husband wasn’t coming back and her erratic breathing became normal again, she went to meet her friends.

Gwyn was barefoot and sited on the ground, her hair all the colors except the auburn shade the Mother had given her. Emerie was standing by her side.

“Is everything okay?” the illyrian asked.

Nesta forced herself to open her mouth in a broad smile for her friends to see.

“Yeah, it was just a misunderstanding” they didn’t look convinced “Family stuff. Sometimes it’s hard to draw the line between family business and the obligations of one’s job, you know.”

Emerie’s hand found hers and gave it a tug. “Well, whenever it becomes too much to handle, come find us.”

“You can always count on us, Nesta. We’ll be here for you.”

Gwyn raised from the grass with some help from her hands. She moved her arms around them, her lips forming a smile that showed all her teeth. When Nesta thought the redhead was going to hug them, she opened her fists in their faces, stardust  flowing from them and into their bodies.

Emerie coughed, Nesta only burst out a loud laugh that resonated in every balcony of the House of Wind. She had been taken by surpise. And it had been fun.

Nesta forgot about every other person she had met that night and the presence of those two females by her side became so obvious and indubitable, she almost cried for a second time.

Her friends. She was going to spend Starfall with her friends. The family she had chosen. Who had also chosen her.

Emerie was giggling too, but she hadn’t appreciated the surprise as much as Nesta. “Why did you do that?” she reprimanded Gwyn, the amusement impossible to hide.

“You were too clean. I think I have stardust even under the tunic” Gwyn said. Her slippers, abandoned in a corner, were for sure coated with light blue glimmer.

“They are spirits, Gwyneth Berdara!” Emrie corrected. “It’s not dust.”

Was it not? Nesta didn’t know about that, or how spirits could take this form at all. She had always imagined ghosts as ethereal beings, not shooting stars.

“Doesn’t matter, let’s just enjoy the night. You probably don’t want to be bored by a history lesson” she joked.

“I do.” Nesta sat on the grass, Gwyn was quick to follow. “I want you to tell me everything about it, please”.

Emerie had to give in and let the smile she was hiding shine on her lips. Pretending she wasn’t as eager to share legends and stories about her Court with them as they were to hear her talk, Emerie started her tale.

Stories about our Court, she corrected herself. Because it was now a home for the three of them.

[scribbles97]

Crushed

A scene from Left Behind that just wouldn't leave me alone but I also never got around to linking up with the rest of the fic.

@gumnut-logic thank you for giving me ideas for Gordon's accident!

@lenna-z and @janetm74 thank you both for all the love and comments on Left Behind... I'm sorry that it got the better of me.

It should have been routine. Just a recovery mission, he had told her with that sunshine grin as he had headed for his chute. Lucy hadn’t needed to monitor him, there wouldn’t be any more to tell until he got back with whatever it was they were meant to find there.

She had always disliked not watching her boys when they were out on missions, but trusted them enough to know better than to hover.

None of them had expected the emergency code. The tone all of them knew and dreaded filling the whole villa.

There was only one son missing from the lounge, John’s eyes wide and lips pressed thin as he looked straight to her from Thunderbird Five.

“Gordon, you’ve activated your emergency code.”

She found herself holding her breath as they waited for some form of response, anything to tell them what they needed to know.

Nothing came.

“Gordon?” John pressed, eyes breaking away to focus on something outside of the scope of the hologram, “Gordon, do you copy? Gordon!”

It was the fear she didn’t doubt all of them were feeling, no more words spoken as they turned as one towards Thunderbird Two. For once she didn’t even hesitate about Alan’s presence, she needed them all where she could see them.

“It’s Gaat.” Kayo confirmed once Thunderbird Two was in the air, “I’m in pursuit of the Chaos Crew now, GDF are assisting.”

Something in Lucy had broken at the revelation. Gordon had been looking for answers for her, had been put in danger by a man with a grudge against her, yet she had done nothing. She hadn’t even been watching.

Their eyes were all on her, waiting for some form of confirmation, some acknowledgement of what was happening. She was their mother, but also their leader.

It was time for her to lead.

“Kayo be careful, if he’s done this to Thunderbird Four we don’t know what else he might do.”

“F.A.B.”

“John,” She swallowed, turning her attention to the rescue at hand, trying as hard as she could to brush away the thought of just who it was they were rescuing, “I need the closest team possible to--”

“Cen Am team have two subs en-route, they were in the area on drills, eta fifteen minutes.” He hesitated, glancing away and then back again, “Lady Penelope will be joining to assist.”

It was all the team she could ask for.

“F.A.B. thank you John.”

He nodded but didn’t close the line, still hovering in the corner of her vision as she looked to the live feed of vials displayed for them all.

“What do we do, Mom?”

Alan’s voice was every bit the small child she still believed he was, even if she knew he was there to help.

She just had to show him how.

“We rig two sub pods, they’ll be able to manage at that depth for the time we need. External cameras on Four are compromised so we don’t know what we’re going in to. Once we have an exact picture, we’ll make a plan.”

“Who--”

“Go and rig the pods, Alan.” Scott cut him off, “We’ll meet you down there.”

It was the first thing her eldest had said since the emergency code had come in. When she turned in her seat, his eyes were fixed firmly on her, hard and determined just like she knew his father would have been in that exact moment.

“I’ll go down with Alan.”

Anger flared in her chest. Gordon was her son, she had already done too little to help and--

“Mom, you’re compromised.” Scott continued, voice softening, “We don’t know what we’re going to find--”

“And you think it’s okay to send his kid brother down there instead?” She snapped back, “No Scott I won’t--”

“Alan pulled John from space.” He cut her off, “You’re blaming yourself for what’s happened. I trust your judgement Mom, but I don’t think it’s the best thing for you to go down there.”

She wanted to protest more, she needed to do something other than just sit there and watch. Except, she knew Scott was right, knew that at any point something could well tip her over the edge and break the camel's back.

A heavy, solid hand on her shoulder made her look across to Virgil. The slightest of nods from him confirming a quiet agreement to Scott’s reasoning.

She trusted her boys to look after one another, knew that Scott would do everything she would. He hadn’t been the one to send his kid brother out there that day, he held no guilt over the situation.

But still she couldn’t simply sit by and wait.

“I’ll prep the med bay, meet you in the module with a stretcher.” She murmured, glancing back to the weakening life sign.

“Okay.” Scott nodded, smiling softly as he reached out to her other shoulder, “We’ll get him back, Mom. I swear it.”

She straightened, eyes fixing on the stats as they dropped again. It wasn’t getting him to the surface that she was worried about.

“Virgil you’ll be needed to see to him.” There was only one fully trained medic among them, and for that she would forever be grateful, “Once Scott and Alan are up you should transfer control to them and see what’s needed for treatment.”

“F.A.B.” He agreed quietly, “We’re coming up on the drop zone.”

She nodded, unbuckling from her seat, “Let’s get our fish back on dry land.”

***

It was torture to stand in the module and simply listen. Alan’s exclamation had given her visions of all the worst situations, only backed up by Scott’s murmur of things being worse than he thought.

She wasn’t sure if the images John had relayed to her from the pod's external cameras were what she had expected or not. The area was known for its hydrothermal activity, but to see one of the stacks of rock pinning Thunderbird Four upside down, the machine crippled under the weight, made her heart twist painfully.

Scott had taken full direction of the underwater rescue, the two stronger subs lifting the chimney whilst Penelope pulled Gordon from the wreck.

Her soft gasp spoke volumes. Part of Lucy wanting to smile at the thought of just how well the pair suited each other, even if they had been skirting around the fact forever. There was fear there too though and it echoed through Lucy’s entire being.

“Get him up to the med bay.” Scott was instructing, “We’ll recover Thunderbird Four and meet you up there.”

A murmur of agreements and before she knew, Lucy was stepping to one side to allow FAB One to pull into the module.

It was hard to not look too eager as she pulled the rear door open, only to stifle a sob at the sight before her. Gordon draped across the back seat, face bloodied and bruised, everything about him just not quite right.

Penelope’s eyes were just as fearful as Lucy had expected as she looked to her, “He hasn’t stirred.”

It wasn’t a reassurance.

“Let’s move him, get him to a hospital.”

The island infirmary wouldn’t be enough for him.

“His helmet was leaking air,” Penelope explained as they moved as one to get him onto the hover stretcher, “I had to take it off, he was almost out.”

Over the years Lucy had heard enough people giving needless explanations to know what it really was.

“You did the right thing.” She assured, “You got him out of there Penny, thank you.”

The younger woman’s smile was tight as the module clunked into its position within Thunderbird Two.

“Shall I send Virgil?” She offered, hovering at a distance as the hover stretcher maneuvered itself into position in its dock.

Lucy nodded, too focussed on setting up the med scan, he needed a line placing, an oxygen mask. Finally she could at least do something.

His baldrick was first to go, cut away and discarded on the opposite side of the room. She didn’t like the unnatural set of his shoulder or his wrist. She didn’t like all the ambers and reds flashing up in front of her. She didn’t like that he hadn’t moved in the slightest.

“Mom,” John appeared above the stretcher, “Eos is going to remote pilot Two to the nearest hospital, Scott and Alan are going to get a lift with Cen Am once they’ve recovered Four.”

She paused as she taped the line in place in the back of Gordon’s hand, “They’re not--”

“They know he’s in good hands,” John smiled softly, “and that time is precious.”

Swallowing against the sudden lump in her throat, Lucy nodded, “F.A.B.”

It was the sharp movement of his chest that caught her attention, the way it moved deeper for a single breath and held there for a long moment before releasing again with a soft cry.

“Gordy?” She murmured, moving to his head, “Are you with us?”

“Momma?” It was barely a whisper through the mask as cloudy amber eyes blinked up at her, “Mm, it hur’s. Really hur’s momma.”

All of the boys had always loved her stroking their hair, and all of her wished she could at that moment. But there was so much blood, a warning still fresh in her mind of a head injury. She didn’t dare touch anywhere that wasn’t okay.

“I’m here baby,” She soothed, reaching out to the hand she had just placed the cannula in, “I know it hurts, Virgil will be here soon to make it better. ‘Kay? Think you can stay awake for that?”

“Mom, it hurts.” He repeated, eyes so distant she knew he wasn’t seeing the scene in front of him, “‘m scared.”

“You’re safe Gordy.” She soothed softly, blinking away the tears that stung her eyes, “We’re all here for you and we’re gonna make it better.”

His eyes focused, amber that matched her own reflecting back at her in a moment of clarity.

“Mom?”

“Right here Kiddo.” She whispered, braving her own fear to reach out and touch his cheek, “You with me?”

Fingers tightened weakly around hers, holding on with everything he had.

“It’s okay.” She whispered, trying to sound more sure than she felt, “It’s all going to be fine Gordy.”

His eyes were still clear as he watched her, clouded with fear and pain. There wasn’t the spark there should have been, no smile as there had been earlier in the day.

“Mom, I can’t feel my legs.”

[loveafterthefact]

Love After the Fact Chapter 43: Lost and Found Part 1

Shiro and his team are sent to retrieve a high-profile individual. They don't exactly get what they came for.

First  Previous  Next

They’ve been riding all day, Shiro and his team. The pine forest isn’t at all one of the roughest places to be, though it isn’t the easiest either. Wild wolves roam the ground and kronil loom in the trees. Not to mention vakalt, grinongins, and riesmekts.

“Remind me again what Zarkon wants with this traitor,” one of his men grumbles. Haxus, as usual. Patience yields focus.

“He wants to see his littermate, so he has asked us to summon him to the Imperial Compound. Akira hasn’t seen the Emperor since before Prince Lotor was born, and he reportedly has a kit of his own now.”

“A kit? As in one, single kit?” Ulaz asks, confused. “Are he and Emperor Zarkon far apart in age?”

“His mate’s been serving nearly twenty decaphoebs, so no. Just one, nearly grown.” Shiro frowns. “Odd, but maybe there's a reason. We’re nearly there.”

“We should be out killing Alteans, not inviting traitors over for dinner,” Haxus bites.

Shiro suppresses a sigh. All Haxus cares about is killing. He himself has begun to grow tired of it, suspects that perhaps his liege has as well. Zarkon’s marriage to an Altean managed to settle their disputes for a while, but the citizens were still finding each other a… ‘nuisance’.

With the invention of prolonged space travel, both peoples were struggling to be kind to their closest neighbor. So different from one another, Daibazaal’s first visit from Alteans had led to misunderstandings. The discovery that they were not alone had rapidly shifted from a relief to an inconvenience, then on into war.

“What the-” Drama turns, peering with keen eyes into a particular stand of trees.

Shiro twists to look. “What is it?”

The lieutenant frowns, suspicious as she inspects the forest. “I thought I saw something.”

“A kronil, sir?” Firn draws his sword. “Should we form up?”

Sniffing the air, Shiro rotates his ears, surveying the forest. “... I don’t smell anything, but yes. Drama, take point. Entri, take her left. Firn and Grat, take her right. Stagger yourselves. Sendak, Haxus, flank on either side and just behind us. Make sure nothing comes up on us from the back.”

“Yes, sir!” The squad rearranges their elk, keeping the disturbance and their firepower on their right. Shiro remains in the middle, where he can more easily monitor everyone.

“Sir? What if-”

“Don’t worry, Entri.” Shiro turns back to smile at the young soldier. The Galra has very little experience. Shiro's taken the youth on more as a favor than anything else, but she has talent. She’s just a little more timid than Shiro would prefer.

“Kronil are dangerous, but if it was a kronil, we’d likely smell it by now. It’s probably just a primate.” To Shiro’s relief, that seems to set Entri at ease.

“It was bigger than a primate,” Drama whispers. “But I agree it wasn’t a kronil. Thank the gods. I’m not in the mood to get turned inside out today.”

“Maybe tomorrow?” Grat teases.

“Alteans?” Sendak murmurs, gaze piercing the trees.

“Doubtful. If it was an Altean, we’d have seen white or nothing at all.” Shiro scans the edge of the forest for- there it is. A small trail cut into the trees. He frowns, eyeing the-

“A bit overgrown, isn’t it?” Drama murmurs. “Looks pretty unused.”

Sendak grunts in agreement. “What respectable bearer would want to live in the woods like a hermit?”

“General Krolia,” Grat whispers in awe.

“No fuckin’ way,” Sendak counters.

“Way. She ran off with Akira several decaphoebs before her first season!”

“So a traitor and a runt. Sounds like a perfect match,” Sendak grunts.

Shiro rolls his eyes. Haxus and Sendak sound like an equally perfect match.

“She’s advanced faster than you, sergeant. She’ll be a commander before long,” Ulaz murmurs. “Took over Akira’s required service. Better for the kit, I suppose. Or perhaps Akira refused to fight. He left in protest of the empire.”

With a hum, Shiro pushes to the front, black cloak falling over his elk’s back. “We’ll have to go through in a file formation. Haxus, right behind me. Sendak at the back. Everyone stay close and watch the trees.”

A short ride into the trees, and they come across a den. It’s simple, traditional, three connected domes, stones sealed together with clay, a sun- and weather-beaten cloth covering the entrance. The top of one of the small domes has crumbled inward. The oven in front, a collection of stones, seems long since crumbled to pieces, the fire pit charred.

“Sir, are you sure there’s someone living here?” Firn whispers. “It seems abandoned.”

Firn is right. Frowning, Shiro dismounts his elk, passes the reins to Haxus. It looks like no one’s cared for this den in a centaphoeb. Everything is quiet and still. Ulaz dismounts, coming up behind him as he crouches in front of the fire pit.

“It’s warm.” Someone is here, but something is very clearly not right. He turns to Ulaz, whispers quietly. “Watch my back.”

Creeping toward the den, Shiro readies his blade, keeping it loose in its sheath. Ears pricked, he pushes the tattered cloth aside. He notices that someone attempted to mend a hole in it, tried with an unsteady hand to reinforce the fraying edges.

Inside, the furniture stands still among scattered earth, leaves and twigs. Ulaz whistles softly, points to scrapes trailing from the legs of a small stool. In another, larger chair, is a threadbare blanket. Careful not to touch it, Shiro sniffs the fabric. The scent is strong. Fresh.

Ulaz comes after him, sniffing the blanket. “Sir.”

Shiro nods. It doesn’t smell at all like a Galra of breeding age. It’s soft, sweet, young. In need of protection. The kit. He offers the sire of one, about to be four, a communicative look. Ulaz nods. He can handle this.

They’ve both experienced this before, and it doesn’t get easier.

A rustle to their left, and Shiro keeps point, Ulaz watching his back in case it’s a diversion.

This room is for sleeping, a tattered bed still hanging from the ceiling. A sense of dread begins to simmer in Shiro’s chest as he eyes the single indentation in the thinly stuffed bed.

“Sir.”

“I know. I see it.”

A commotion outside has them running, Sendak’s shout raising alarm. Shiro skids to a stop, notices one of their elk is down, his soldiers glaring up into a tree. Entri has her sword drawn, Firn and Grat have their bows, and Drama is seething. Sendak throws a rock and-

A yowl in response. Shiro runs up, stares up into the branches of a nearby pine. His jaw drops, heart falling with it.

In the tree is a scrawny, naked kit, hissing, snarling, glaring down, ears pressed flat against their skull. Feral. Kits always go feral left alone like this. It happens too often, and there's not always anything they can do for them. One this old? Shiro doesn't like their chances.

“Hey, it’s okay. What’s your name?” Entri asks. Trying, but lacking the needed experience.

“Fuck that shit.” Sendak surges forward. “You! Get your ass down from that tree right now, or we will shoot you down!”

The kit hisses, shrinking as small as they can in the tree. The strip of longer, thicker fur down their back stands straight on end. It’s clearly been a while since they saw another person. They're timid, not eager for a fight. It's a good sign. It suggests they recognize their own kind.

“Sendak, stand down. Everyone get back.” Everyone steps back as Shiro steps forward, Drama still grumbling about her dead elk. “Right.”

The kit shifts, eyeing him as he approaches.

“Well, well, well. Intersex. Not every day you see one of those, eh Shiro?” Haxus snickers. “Oh, and a tail. Weren’t for their size, they’ll be downright pretty when they grow up.”

It’s true. The kit has to be around seventeen to fit the timeline, and yet they are indeed small, still on the slender side. Their tail is wrapped tightly around the branch as they lean forward, hissing fiercely, claws extended, digging into the bark of the branch. A tangled braid hangs down their back.

“Hey. It’s alright.” Shiro sets his blade down on the ground, holds his hands up in surrender. The kit growls, huddles against the trunk of their tree. “Do you have a name?”

They only hiss, eyes narrowed to slits.

“Okay, it’s okay. Um.” Shiro hesitates. “Do you- Do you know a man by the name of Akira?”

The kit blinks, softening enough to reveal large, violet eyes.

“Is- Is he your sire? Do you know him?”

Curling against the trunk of the tree, the kit’s ears droop. Seems they can understand what Shiro’s saying, but he has a sickening suspicion that they haven’t had someone to speak to in some time.

“Where’s your sire, kitten?” Shiro murmurs. “What happened here, hm?” After a long pause, the kit relaxes a bit.

“Hey.” Shiro reaches up to try and touch them, but they flinch, curling tighter against the tree. The sun is going down, cold starting to creep in. Shiro cuts the cloak from his armor, hangs it on a branch just below the skittish stray. They stare at it for a second, glancing between him and the cloak, then slowly reach down, lifting it up to their own branch.

“You can have it. It’s nice and warm. And don’t worry about the elk. It’ll taste good, and we can get another one when we get back to the compound. Nobody’s mad-” Please keep your fucking mouths shut, guys. “-and we’re all good, okay?”

Sniffing the cloak suspiciously, they seem to find it satisfactory, wrapping it around their shoulders, still curling into the tree trunk. Now that their alarm has dissipated, all that’s left is a trembling kit sitting mostly naked on a tree branch.

“Okay.” Shiro breaths out soft and slow, takes careful steps back, his squad following his lead. “When- When you’re ready, maybe you can come down?”

The kit stares at him for a long moment, then ties the cloak so it hangs off one shoulder. They sit quietly in the tree, watching. Shiro turns away. “Alright, soldiers. Let’s set up camp. We need to figure out what happened here.”

Up in the tree, a pair of violet eyes doesn’t waver for an instant, following the captain wherever he goes as night sets in.

[theoriginalladya]

Whump prompts: Dialogue 14, Trauma 9, Scenario 15 for fShenko.

from this prompt list

On AO3 here

Thank you so much for asking!  This was a bit challenging, but it was great fun!

~~~

Kaidan bolts up in bed gasping, his heart beating so strong and fast it’s a wonder it doesn’t pound right out of his chest.  It’s dark and it takes a long minute to remember where he is; the Normandy.  His eyes flutter twice as he peers through the darkness, searching.  Not just the Normandy, but his quarters aboard the ship; quarters the commander insisted he have upon his return to the ship.  Slowly, he takes a deep, steadying breath, and with it the memories.

Innumerable days spent at Huerta Memorial Hospital, and the uncertainty of whether he will be capable of returning to the war.

His shoulders tremble a bit as he takes another breath; slowly releases it.

His pride and honor in becoming the second human Spectre, and the pageantry and pomp Udina insisted upon to celebrate.

And another.

Cerberus’, and by association Udina’s, failure in taking over the Citadel; coming face to face with Shepard’s weapon and the conviction in her eyes.

And another.

Shepard agreeing to take him back on board the Normandy; after their experience on Mars, a pleasant and welcome surprise.

Visibility is slightly better now and he glances over at the chronometer to note the time. He’s been asleep for only a few hours.  The Normandy is still docked on the Citadel, taking on supplies before heading back out to battle against the Reapers.  By rights, he should be fast asleep…

“Major Alenko?”

His eyes lift as the voice echoes around him, though there is nothing to look at except for the ceiling.  “EDI?”

“Major, I monitored a communication between Huerta Memorial Hospital and C-Sec regarding a victim brought in for treatment,” the AI continues.  “The description matches that of Commander Shepard.”

Ice freezes Kaidan’s veins as the words sink in. Shepard?  In the hospital? ��As a patient?  He lunges off the bed and is half dressed when something about what EDI’s words penetrates the panic.  “Wait – a communication between the hospital and C-Sec?  Why?”

“It appears the victim,” EDI replies, “has no memory of what happened.”

 ~

He sends a message to Garrus as he exits the ship. The turian, currently calibrating the guns while awaiting a response from the Primarch regarding troop deployments, agrees to contact Commander Bailey directly.  Before Kaidan can arrange a skycab, Garrus sends a message back; Bailey will meet you in the lobby at the hospital.

Sure enough, Bailey flags him down the moment he exits the elevator, and the pair step off to a quiet corner, or as quiet as they can find considering the overflow of patients thanks to the coup attempt.  “I’ve got my best people working on it,” Bailey says as he presses a button on his omni-tool.  “So far, this is all we’ve found.”  

What follows is a brief video clip taken some place in the Wards.  Security camera footage, most likely.  Though grainy, the image is clearly of Shepard as she stands in front of a closed store front. The clip lasts no more than twenty seconds, from beginning to end, and there is no sound, but one thing is clear; at approximately the thirteen second mark, something changes.  One moment, Shepard is fine, smiling and nodding as someone walks by and waves.  The next, the commander looks confused and shakes her head a few times as if trying to rid herself of something.  That apparently fails, and she lifts her hand to pound the sides of her head with her palms and directly over her ears.  Her lips part, her breathing becomes shallow, and she falls to her knees.  The last thing Kaidan sees clearly on her face before the vid stops is the look of absolute terror in her eyes before they roll back and she falls to the ground unmoving.

Kaidan looks over at Bailey.  “What happened?”

“We don’t know.  Someone found her lying there, brought her here,” Bailey explains. “The doc who admitted her reached out to C-Sec thinking she was a victim of an assault.”

“Assault?”  Alliance soldier, N7 trained and the first human Spectre, attacked without seeing it coming?  It’s always possible, but highly unlikely.  Unless … “A trap or something Cerberus left behind?” he suggests.

Bailey shrugs.  “Right now, we’re just trying to figure out what happened.  We were lucky to find that vid of her.  No one seems to know what she was doing there, though. That and the doc said she was muttering quietly when she was brought in.”

Muttering … that was good, wasn’t it?  “What did she say?”  

“Something about silence.”  He scrolls through the screen on his omni-tool, pausing when he finds what he’s looking for.  “Too quiet … no sound … why is there no sound …,” he reads.

It’s useless to panic at this point, not until he has the chance to talk to her, to see if she can tell him anything else that might help it make sense.  “I want to see her.”  

Bailey nods.  “Figured you would.  I got you cleared to go in, but the docs don’t want more than one person in there at a time.” He shares a concerned look with Kaidan. “She’s pretty rattled, from what I understand.”

Kaidan finds a nurse who directs him to the appropriate room.  A second one briefs him before allowing him access.  She’s been given a sedative to keep her calm, but she’s awake.

He enters the room to find it dark but for a small light near the bedside.  He finds her lying in the bed, head facing away from him.  “Hey, Shepard,” he calls out softly, just loud enough for her to hear.

Her head rolls slowly in his direction, but when their eyes meet, there is  no doubt in his mind that something is very, very wrong.  Her eyes, emerald green with brilliant flecks of gold, are … empty.  There’s no sign of her previous fear, and that’s a good sign, but it’s more than that; there is no sign of any reaction in them whatsoever.  Not even recognition.  She shifts a little in the bed to get comfortable as she continues to stare at him.

Moving closer, he finds no evidence of bandages or injury, just the IV line through which she’s receiving her medication.  The lack of response from her after all they’ve been through together is a bit unnerving and he plasters a smile on his lips; her expression doesn’t change one bit.  

“Hey,” he murmurs again, noting she’s said nothing either.  “You all right?”

She blinks twice, almost lazily, but he knows that’s likely more due to the sedative.  When she speaks, her voice is the familiar, gentle, husky timbre he’s come to love so much.  “Where am I?” she asks.

It’s Kaidan’s turn to blink.  Haven’t the doctors told her?  “Huerta Memorial,” he replies.  Unable to restrain himself any longer, he gently takes her hand in his, careful of the IV line.  “EDI alerted me you’d been brought here.”

Her gaze falls to stare at their hands, a slightly disgruntled look marring her brow as she frowns, before rising back to his face. “Who are you?  And, who’s EDI?”

[lyndsaybones]

😬😬😬 Follow up AU where Scully gets to rock William in the white chair while she and Mulder look at the stars?

Hastily written and sickly sweet. Enjoy!

6. They work on the house on the weekends. New paint, refinishing the floors. The wiring in the kitchen is a little glitchy. The yard needs some serious landscaping. They make a burn pile out of the cut branches and weeds, after they’ve dried out for a few weeks. They sit in the back of the property with bottles of beer and a big blanket spread on the ground. The orange bonfire sparks go up and up, into a cloudless sky. The world goes navy and then black, and they lie under the stars, their heads light from smoke and sweating bottles of citrus shandy. It feels like an imaginary summer, one he never really had, but wishes he did. They make love with cicadas singing them a ballad.

7. She’s too tired to get up on a sunny Saturday morning. They were meant to be pulling the million year old tile backsplash out of the kitchen today, but she’s just so sleepy.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” she sighs, still cocooned in her down comforter. “I haven’t been this tired in ages.”

He sweeps her hair behind her ear and drops a kiss on her cheekbone.

“We’ve been pushing pretty hard at the house. Maybe we should take it easy this weekend,” he offers.

“Noooo,” she sighs. “We need to get it done. The new counters and backsplash need to go in this week.”

“We could pay for them to do the demo too, you know?”

“Where’s the fun in that?” she asks as she yawns and sits up.

They muddle through breakfast, her yawning and sighing the whole way. She falls asleep in the car on the drive out. She seems to perk up a bit when she gets a pry bar in her hands and goes to work tearing out the custard yellow tiles in the kitchen. They work their way through lunchtime, a radio blasting seventies rock as they pile broken tiles onto a tarp in the middle of the floor. It is Scully who finally calls for a break in the humidity of the late afternoon. She pulls off her mask as she pushes the screen door open and promptly collapses on the front porch.

In the ER waiting room, she chalks it up to low blood sugar, dehydration and too many calories burnt.

On the way home, they sit in stunned silence. He can’t stop looking at her, disbelief, shock, utter joy. They start laughing, the both of them. Laughing until tears are streaming down their cheeks.

8. The timeline is considerably sped up. They’d planned on doing most of the work themselves, but there’s a lot to be done yet and the baby will be coming in just under six months.

The baby.

Their baby, who is perfectly healthy and growing like a weed. Scully’s already had to switch to stretchy waistbands and oversized blouses. As her energy improves and her appetite returns, she is positively glowing. She gets very annoyed when he tells her this.

She wants to get moved in before she hits the third trimester, knowing that she will be too tired and too big to do much more than gestate.

They hire out the last of the remodeling work, get the leaky roof taken care of. When she hits the 30 week mark, the movers are packing the last of her things into a truck and she closes the door on her apartment for the last time.

9. The contractions start early on a Tuesday morning. It is snowing, fat, wet snow.The world outside their windows is ethereally bright in the sunrise.  

“I don’t need to be in the hospital, I’m not sick,” she sighs when Mulder asks, repeatedly, to get going. “They’ll have me in a bed, on a monitor, I won’t be able to eat or drink or move. I’d rather just stay here for now.”

She labors all day and into the night, eating, moving and napping as she pleases. She quietly breathes and winces her way through the waves as they rise up and recede. Mulder rubs her back, walks with her through the snow drifts, brings her tea and water whether she asks for it or not. He makes sandwiches and soup for lunch. He watches her like a ticking bomb, which she tells him to stop doing, please and thank you.

She is on the couch halfway through folding a stack of onesies and munching on a bowl of almonds when she gasps and pitches forward. He’s just finishing the dinner dishes when he stops cold at the change in her breathing.

“Hey,” he says, kneeling next to the couch. “Time to go?”

She groans softly and nods.

Their son is born on a Wednesday, 28 hours after labor started. He is puffy eyed and squishy and perfect.

They name him William Blaise. She sold him on her family’s tradition to give a middle name based on the Feast Day closest to the baby’s birthday. He agrees because the boy was most definitely conceived in front of a bonfire and spelling is semantic.

10.  William sleeps really well, as long as someone is holding him and doing it just so, and it’s better if there’s white noise, and a shirt that smells like Scully if the real McCoy is in the shower or trying to eat a meal with both hands.  

“He’s pretty new at all this,” Mulder explains from the doorway.

“Think that’s it?” Scully sighs as she paces the baby’s room with their whimpering son pressed against her chest.

It is next level exhaustion they are experiencing, a kind of bone tired that neither one has felt before. But it’s delicious in its own way. The 3 am snuggles, the smell of baby shampoo, watching him look at everything with his worried little brow. Watching Scully become a mother has left him awestruck. The way she looks at the baby with utter devotion, it overwhelms him. He knows he’d die for them if it came down to it.

Scully sways in front of the window, attempting to soothe their disgruntled son. And that’s when he remembers the project he began weeks ago, surreptitiously sneaking to the basement to sand and paint.  

“Hang on,” he says, darting away.

She turns, giving the empty doorway a confused look. A few moments later, she can hear him plodding back up the stairs and lumbering down the hall. He appears with his hands full, a rocking chair, freshly painted white.

“Is that the one that was here when we bought the house?” she asks, a wistful little smile tugging at the corner of her mouth.

“It is,” he says as he carries it to the window. “Try it out.”

She sits, carefully, shushing and patting as she goes. She begins to rock and looks up at Mulder with a grateful smile. William is not one bit impressed, but he is tired, and after a while in the gentle sway of the rocking chair, he gives up.

Mulder points and leans in close to Scully’s cheek.

“You can see the North Star from here,” he whispers. “So we can always find our way.”

She smiles, kisses William’s forehead and then Mulder’s cheek. “We already did.”

[chalantness]

Hey for the fluffy prompts romanogers 7, 95, 98

“Steve and Natasha 61 and 72” requested by @sleepygrimm, and “084: “I think you might be pregnant.” Pleaseeeee” requested by @elcapitan-rogers, and “072 reminds me of that gif set evanzski did based off of Friends” requested by @gomustanggirl16 - I think you mean this one but I also sort of referenced this one, and by referenced I mean very loosely took the concept of the scene and then changed basically every other part of it to maximize the fluff

61. “I wanted to surprise you for our anniversary, but everything that could go wrong, did go wrong.” + 72. “Do you think it’s possible that I…might be… pregnant?” + 84. “I think you might be pregnant.” + 95. “Mm…your kid before five in the morning.” + 98. “I think we should have another.” (fluff meme)

“I’m really sorry, Nat.”

She can practically see that face he makes when he’s upset - the way his eyebrows pinch together, the way his lip curls ever so slightly in a pout - and it makes her want to laugh and maybe sort of cry at the same time. It’s ridiculous that she’s even bothered by something like this. It’s hardly the first time that one of them has been late coming home, and at least she knows he’s just in the city with Tony and Nick and not off the grid somewhere on a different continent. She knows with certainty that he’ll be home, and whether that’s in half an hour or not until the next morning is not really important after that.

But, still. Maybe it’s the cranky mood that James has been in all day, but she feels weirdly unsettled.

Wanda basically pouted until they agreed to let her watch James so they could have tonight to themselves. No, it’s not the first time they’ve been away from their baby, but it’s not as if they make a habit of it. She likes being home, and honestly, she couldn’t care less about the dinner reservation they had to cancel tonight or the hotel suite they’d already paid for. She just wants Steve.

“Don’t even start with that,” she says, trying to make her voice sound light and teasing, except James is still sort of whimpering unhappily and that tugs at her chest a lot harder than when when he’s just crying. “I know it’s not your fault.”

“I know, but…” James cuts him off, his crying hitching up an octave, and Natasha glances over her shoulder at where Wanda is pacing around the coffee table, murmuring to James as she gently bounces him in her arms. “Fuck,” Steve exhales. “He’s still in a mood?”

“Yeah,” she admits. He’d been fussy even before Steve left, and she kind of thinks it’s because he’d somehow known that his dad wouldn’t be home on time.

“He doesn’t want to sleep?”

“No, and he’s not hungry, and I just changed him.” She rubs her fingertips over the middle of her forehead. “He just misses you.”

“Nat,” Steve says. He knows she’s not trying to guilt him; he’s just as upset with the situation as she is. “I miss you both, too. And I promise I’ll be home soon.”

She knows, realistically, that’s not something he can guarantee. But it still makes her smile, knowing that he’s stubborn as hell and that he’ll find a way to get back to her. It’s not that he’s a pushover, but he likes to be accommodating to everyone and it’s one of the things she loves most about him. He knows that what needs to get done tonight is important, and he’s okay with having to change their plans, knowing that she’ll be okay with it, too. These are just the kind of adjustments they need to make for their line of work and it’s fine.

But he puts his foot down when it comes to her and James, and she loves that about him even more.

“I’m counting on that, Rogers.” She hears him chuckle. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” he echoes, and it’s kind of stupid that that’s all he needs to say to make her smile.

She hangs up and sets her phone down, but, just as she’s turning to walk into the living room, she feels something tug at her stomach. She rubs her lips together, waiting for it to pass - she’s felt a little off the last few days, but only sometimes, and it’s never been uncomfortable enough for her to be all that worried - but after a moment, she feels it again, rumbling low in her stomach.

Wanda happens to catch her gaze, and Natasha must look as uneasy as she feels, because the girl pauses in her stride, her expression pulling together in worry. She’s about to tell her that she’s fine, that it’s nothing, but she doesn’t end up getting the words out. As soon as she parts her lips, she feels that tug to her stomach again, and then she’s rushing down the hallway and into the guest bathroom.

She sort of grips the counter afterward, as she’s rinsing the acid taste from her mouth, and it’s sort of ridiculous that she feels fine barely twenty seconds after throwing up in the toilet. She splashes water on her face, then pats her skin dry before heading back outside. She can’t hear James’s cries anymore, and when she walks into the living room, she finds him drifting quickly to sleep in Wanda’s arms. She knows her baby well enough that he’s not really asleep yet, because he’s never, ever out that easily, but at least he’s finally settled down.

“Everything alright?” Wanda asks, and there’s something different in her expression now that makes Natasha pause. Something knowing.

“I feel fine.” Walking up to her, she pushes the hair from Wanda’s face, tucks it behind her ear. “Although, it seems like you feel differently about the matter.”

Wanda gets this little grin, trying not to jostle James as she cutely shrugs her shoulders. “I just - have this intuition,” she admits, and Natasha doesn’t mean to laugh, but, well. Usually when the girl says something like that, it’s more than just an intuition. “Do you remember what I said to you after you and Steve told us that you were pregnant?” she asks, and Natasha wasn’t entirely sure what she had been expecting, but it definitely hadn’t been that.

“You thought I’d felt - off.”

Wanda nods. “You felt unsettled,” she adds.

Natasha blinks, her lips parting. Wanda gnaws on her lower lip, no doubt trying to gauge Natasha’s reaction before letting her own show.

Unsettled.

Fuck.

“Do you think–” She licks her lips “–it’s possible that I…”

She doesn’t know why she can’t even bring herself to say the words, but it sort of feels like everything is clicking and she’s a little bit overwhelmed.

“That you might totally be pregnant?” Wanda finishes. She lifts her hand, red wisps of light curling out from her fingertips. Natasha follows their path to see them dip into Wanda’s purse still sitting on the breakfast bar, and she’s not at all surprised when she sees a slim box being lifted into the air. She can’t see what’s printed onto it from this distance, but she doesn’t have to; so she just turns to look at Wanda again, raising her eyebrows. Her eyes are sparkling. “Yeah, I’d had a feeling.”

Natasha doesn’t really know why she laughs, but, shit. She hadn’t even realized that she even could have a kid - let alone that she wanted one - before they’d found out about James. And now, barely days after she and Steve decided that they wanted to have another, she realizes that she may already be pregnant?

Her heart does this stupid little flutter, and she hasn’t even taken the test yet.

“Come on,” Wanda says after a moment, and Natasha holds her palm out for Wanda to drop the box in her hand, grinning. “Let’s get your little one to bed and then we’ll find out if you have another little one on the way.”

-

She’s not sure what time it is, but she knows that she hadn’t been asleep for long when she hears the front door being unlocked.

Wanda had insisted on staying over - and she knows it probably has less to do with being too tired to drive home and more to do with the fact that Barnes is in Berlin - and so the girl is curled on the other end of the couch with her, tucked under the duvet that Tony and Pepper gave them for Christmas. Steve steps in quietly, and Natasha feels herself smile as she watches his silhouette pause in the dark, no doubt taking in the sight of her and Wanda and the half-dozen blankets they’d drawn between them.

“Welcome home,” she whispers, and Steve chuckles softly, setting his papers down on the coffee table as he walks over to her.

Fuck, it’s ridiculous how relieved she is to see him right now.

“I’m sorry I’m late. I know, I know I apologized already, but still.” He kneels in front of her, and she actually lets out this little whimper from the back of her throat as his lips slant over hers. It was probably meant to be brief, but she grasps onto the collars of his shirts, twists them with her fingers to keep him in place when he tries to pull away.

Eventually, though, he eases his lips off of hers, and she smiles as she catches his gaze.

“I hope tonight hasn’t set a precedent for the rest of our anniversaries,” he says, and she really, really can’t help the soft laugh that bursts from her lips.

But, before she can even take a breath to tell him, a soft cry comes from the hallway, making them they both pause. Steve lips quirk in a smile as they wait - James babbles in his sleep and it always, always wakes them through his baby monitor, but recently, he hasn’t woken himself up because of it - but then he cries out again, a little louder this time, and Steve breathes out a bit of a laugh.

“Mm.” She hums, loosening her grip on his collar but not entirely letting go just yet. “Your kid before five in the morning,” she says, even though she knows that Steve wouldn’t have asked her to get James. He’s been sleeping through the night for a while now, but she doesn’t doubt that Steve had probably hoped James might wake up because he hasn’t seen him all day.

“Yes, ma’am,” he chuckles, kissing her again before drawing away, except she still hasn’t let go of him, so he doesn’t get very far. “Nat?”

She gnaws on her lower lip a little. “Just… don’t be too long, okay?” His forehead creases in question, and she knows she’s smiling way too widely right now, but she doesn’t care. “I have something to tell you.”

[mysme-headcanons-galore]

Oh god!! My heart breaks after reading the fic about mc getting into an accident 😢 can you write the alternative ending for this? This fic really deserve a happy ending

Yoosung:

“MC has been in an accident and is going into surgery.”

He didn’t realize he was your emergency contact

He’s in shock for a few minutes and reality doesn’t sink in

And then after a few moments, one thought pops into his head

“I can’t lose another person…”

He rushes to get coat and keys and gets to the emergency room as fast as he can

He gets angrier than anyone’s ever seen him when he can’t get any information on you because they don’t know how you’re doing yet

He sits in the waiting room and calls Jumin because he’s the most logical person and Yoosung needs some reassurance that you’ll be okay

And when Jumin starts giving percentages, he hangs up and calls Zen, because maybe he doesn’t need logical right now, maybe he just needs hope

Zen gives him the hope he needs until a doctor steps out

“Are they okay? What’s going on?”

“They just got through a surgery. We’re going to monitor their progress and we’ll let you know when you can see them.”

“But they’re going to be okay?” Yoosung’s voice was desperate.

“They should be, yes.”

When they told him that you were awake and he could go in to see you, he ran to you, taking your hand and crying.

“I was so scared I was going to lose you and I lost Rika and I can’t lose another person I love.”

Zen hung by the door, a smile on his face at seeing you okay

Yoosung stayed by your side until you were allowed to leave the hospital and then he begged you to come to stay at his house for a while. He took off school until you could take care of yourself for a few hours.

He still stuck by your side when he was home, though

And he was always careful when you left the house. He was terrified of you getting into another accident.

Zen:

“MC has been in an accident and is going into surgery”

Zen drops what he’s doing immediately to rush to the hospital

He gets extremely angry when they can’t tell him any news, but he understands

He paces back and forth in the waiting room, trying to keep control of himself

He learns that the beast can appear in anger, too

He doesn’t call anyone, but he does let everyone know in the messenger

They all want him to talk to them, but he leaves the chatroom and continues pacing

If he thinks about the situation too much, he’s going to get anxious and if he gets anxious, he’s going to start thinking about the worst

So when the doctor comes out, he rushes toward the doctor, begging for news

“Good news! They’ve had a successful surgery. I’ll let you know when you can come in and see them.”

“I want to see them now.”

“I know, sir, but it’s better for their recovery if they can spend some time alone.”

Zen sighed and went back to his pacing. It was more important that you have the space you need to recover.

When he got the okay to go back and see you, he walked into the room slowly, trying not to overwhelm you.

He sits next to you and takes your hand, and doesn’t leave unless you tell him you want to be alone

When you’re cleared to leave the hospital, he takes you to his house so he can help take care of you

Even once you’re all healed, he begs you to tell him wherever you’re going, terrified that you’ll get hurt again

Every time you leave his side in the future, you can see the fear in his eyes, how scared he is that you’ll be hurt again

Jaehee:

“MC has been in an accident and is going into surgery”

She finishes helping customers and closes down the cafe, hurrying to head to the hospital

She waits in the waiting room, anxiety forming in her stomach and her past coming back to haunt her

She calls Zen to talk to because she needs to have an ear to listen

He helps her calm down and reminds her that just because something happened in the past doesn’t mean it’s going to happen again

He helps her stay calm for a while

That is, until the doctor comes in the room

She stays seated until the doctor walks over to her and says, “While they still need a while to recover, we’ve finished the surgery and we believe they’ll be okay.”

She pauses before the tears of relief fall down her face.

She waits for a while longer until you’ve woken up and she can come in and see you

She calmly walks to your room and sits next to you

She asks how you feel and always asks if you need anything

Her calming presence helps you through your recovery and when you’re cleared to leave the hospital, she asks you to go to the bakery with her every day

She does all the work, but she enjoys having you there and wants to make sure you’re taken care of

Even when you start to work again, she makes sure you aren’t overwhelmed and that you get as many breaks as you need

Over time, things in your lives slowly return to normal, the only difference being Jaehee told you how she appreciated you more often

Jumin:

“MC has been in an accident and is going into surgery.”

No.

No, you’re not leaving him, that isn’t allowed.

He finds Driver Kim, who can see the urgency in his face and gets him to the hospital as fast as he can

“We’re here, Mr. Han.” Even though Jumin is already halfway to the door

He heads in and asks every nurse and doctor about information

He even tries to bribe them in his desperation

The logical part of his brain basically turns off

He calls V because his best friend, who has lost the love of his life might be the best person to talk to about it

After V gets Jumin to calm down a bit, the doctor comes out

Jumin starts begging the doctor, before the doctor even says anything

“Please, I’ll take them to another hospital, I’ll pay more money, I’ll do whatever you want”

“Mr. Han, their surgery was successful

“What?”

“They’ll be okay. They just need to recover before you see them.”

Jumin kept himself from crying again as he went to sit down and told V what was happening

He kept talking to V until he was able to enter your room, when he hung up and walked with dignity to your room

He kept himself together until he saw you and burst into tears

“You’re okay…” He whispered

Seeing you in the hospital made him realize how vulnerable you were

He made you promise that you would let him give you a body guard from now on

He also wanted to give you a driver, but he made you take one or the other

Saeyoung:

“MC has been in an accident and is going into surgery.”

He seems to take everything in stride

Even though underneath that facade, he’s panicking

“Are you okay?” Vanderwood asks him

“I’m fine!”

Even though Saeran and Vanderwood both know he isn’t okay

They don’t let him go alone to the hospital, or even drive himself there

He walks in and Saeran gently guides him to the waiting room while Vanderwood asks the doctors for updates

Thank god he has these two or he’d be an absolute mess right now

Though, honestly, they’re both terrified of losing you as well

Saeran whispers to Saeyoung that it’ll be alright and Vanderwood agrees with him, paying attention to Saeyoung’s body language

They’re trying to convince themselves, too, though

Saeyoung tenses when the doctor comes out and Vanderwood stands to talk to him.

“I’ll do it.” Saeyoung wants to hear the verdict for himself

Though the others are close behind him

“They’re going to be okay.” The doctor told them. “They just need a little longer to recover.”

They sigh in relief and nod, thanking the doctor and sitting back down

Saeyoung is super anxious to see you and so was Saeran

Vanderwood helps them both calm down until they can see you

Saeyoung runs into your room as Saeran and Vanderwood walked

Vanderwood hung by the door while the other two sat on either side of you

Saeyoung didn’t eat or sleep, no matter how much you asked him to, until you were able to go home

He asked you to move into the bunker while you were in recovery and he and Vandy took turns taking care of you

He asks you to keep living with them even after you’re better and is secretly glad this at least gave him a reason to spend more time with you

V:

“MC has been in an accident and is going into surgery.”

He heads to the hospital after notifying Seven and Jumin

He asks Jumin to meet him there

He can’t find anything out about you and tries to stay calm

Jumin arrives and they sit in the waiting room patiently

They reminisce about their childhood as Jumin’s way of helping keep V’s mind off of everything

“Remember when you drove your toy car into the side of my house?”

“Yes.” Cue chuckling.

“You’re still a horrible driver.”

They continue talking until V pauses with a sigh. “Thank you for being here, Jumin.”

“Of course. That’s what friends do, V.”

As the words leave Jumin’s mouth, the doctor comes out.

The childhood friends head to the doctor together.

“MC has finished their surgery and will be ready for visitors in a few hours.”

V thanked the doctor and went to sit down until he was able to see you

Once he could, he walked to your room, followed by Jumin, who stood in the doorway and, seeing V’s relief, had a calm smile on his face

V stayed by your side day and night, sleeping in the hospital until you were released.

He asked you to stay at his place until you were fully recovered and by the end of your recovery, you knew you weren’t going to want to leave.

And you didn’t. There was never a conversation, you just slowly ended up moving more and more of your things into his place and eventually he advised you to stop paying for your place.

Saeran:

“MC has been in an accident and is going into surgery.”

Actually? He’s kind of scary

He’s angry and it shows

How dare the world put his MC in danger!

He swoops into the hospital like a bat out of hell and demands to know what’s going on

Luckily, Saeyoung is with him and tries to keep him some semblance of calm

Saeran lashes out at Saeyoung, which is fine with Saeyoung, as long as he isn’t lashing out at hospital staff

Finally, Saeyoung manages to talk some sense into Saeran.

“Would MC want to see you acting like this?”

“…No.”

“Alright, so why don’t we take a deep breath and calm down?”

“…Fine.”

The doctor came out and Saeyoung grabbed Saeran’s waist and made him slow down while he walked.

Saeran fought against Saeyoung, wanting to run to the doctor.

“MC’s surgery is finished. They’ll be okay, they just need some time to recover.

Saeyoung had to hold a tighter grasp on his brother when Saeran tried to go into the room you were in

He actually, literally had to pick Saeran up and carry him back to the chair, with Vanderwood’s help.

They actually draped him across both of their laps, holding him down until the doctor came in and said they could go see you

They finally let him go and he ran in to see you, sitting in the chair by your side and fussing over you, “How are you? Can I get you anything? Do you need me to do anything for you?”

“Saeran, give them some space.” Saeyoung said from a few feet away.

Saeran tells his brother matter-of-factly that you’d be staying with them for a while, before even asking you

When you were released from the hospital, they took you back to the bunker and you ended up not leaving, even after you were recovered. You kept your apartment, but you usually slept at the bunker.

Vanderwood:

“MC has been in an accident and is going into surgery.”

Tries to act like he doesn’t care

Because you’re the only one who he ever showed his true emotions to

He goes to the hospital, without telling Saeyoung

Sits quietly, patiently while the surgery is happening

His mind was going in so many different directions, but he had training from the agency and even the other people in the waiting room were curious about the man who stared straight ahead.

He couldn’t imagine losing you, after you had forced your way through his walls.

He still couldn’t believe he found a person who he couldn’t stay away from. And now he couldn’t lose you.

So when the doctor came out and told Vanderwood, “They’re okay, they just need to recover from the surgery a bit before you can go in.”

He nearly collapsed to the ground in relief, but he held himself together and sat back in the chair.

He didn’t like to let anyone see his emotions aside from you.

So he knew he had to try to keep his cool when the doctor came back out to tell him you were ready.

He headed into your room and unloaded on you. He closed the hospital door and sat next to you, taking your head and bawling.

“Are you okay?” You ask.

“I was so scared I would lose you...” He replied.

He took you back to his house and would take you with him to the bunker. He drove you to the store and wherever else you wanted to go. He didn’t let you leave his side for quite a few months.

Rika:

“MC has been in an accident and is going into surgery.”

She rushes down to the doctor part of Magenta, because that’s where she demands they do your surgery

You’re the only person who’s been able to connect with her on a serious level

You don’t need to hide behind being the sun or the elixir and she loves you for it

She stays in the room the entire time they do your surgery

“The surgery is over, Savior, but they won’t wake up for a bit longer. They should probably be left alone.”

“I won’t bother them.”

The doctors and nurses leave the room and she stays in until you wake up, when she asks if you need anything.

A doctor comes in to give you pain medicine and she watches closely.

Over the next few months, she watches you to make sure you don’t need any more medical attention.

[labgrownsteaks]

Chapter 20

I lit some candles, we still had power but it still seemed fitting given the fact that all the internet was down. I heard the front door close of my parents house. My mom and dad were both outside, and so was everyone else. Neighbors who hadn’t seen one another in months were giving each other waves and head nods. Making small talk about the cable companies and how everyone hates their cell phone service provider. My dad started walking back to the garage, he hadn’t been back here in ages and I suddenly got self conscious. He walked up to the door and I let him in. He was wearing a oversized teal t shirt and pastel pink plaid shorts. Pretty much the most dadlike outfit you could ever imagine.

“Haha! Looks like you kids found something to do during the outtage! “ he said in reference to the strong smell of marijuana in the air. Guy was the first to respond and he always had this habit of being overly formal.

“Hi sir, we’ve just been playing Pitfall until the power went out” he said.

“”I can imagine” my dad said dubiously in response. He then took a look at me as if he hadn’t seen me in years and said “So, what have you been up to lately?” A million things raced through my head, we had just been transformed into gophers to carry out some mission we weren’t even sure of and were saved by an owl that previously wanted to kill us, and were responsible for taking out service for an indiscernible portion of the country.

“Not much, just chillin” I responded

“Well, I hope you kids can find a way to keep yourselves busy without the internet. I know how much y’all depend on it. But get outside and live a little! See the world!” My father said, patting me on the back.

“That’s a good plan sir. We were about to go on a bike ride” Erin piped up.

“Go for a bike ride!” My father retorted with more excitement than made me feel comfortable. “I saw you got that old beast fired up the other day!” he said to me, referencing my bike which had been outfitted with a gas motor. “How’s it running?” he continued on.

“Umm, pretty good. Runs good I guess” I replied.

“Well if you ever want to take a break and work on it together just let me know!” he said with a bit of flair. “I’m always inside there, come say hi sometime!”

“Will do dad. “

Erin and Guy said their own goodbyes, as did I, and he wandered back up the driveway, and looked at the flowers which were planted around a tree in the front yard before waving at the neighbor across the street who was doing the same.

Guy was playing with the roach of the joint, and was lighting it up again, trying to get a couple more hits off of it. Erin looked over at me and I asked “So what now?”

“We wait. What else can we do?” Erin replied.

“You showed a lot of determination out there. With your gopher teeth and all!”

“You just sat on the fence and watched” “What else could I do?!” I retorted, laughing along with Erin.

“You could’ve chomped on some cables!”

Guy interrupted “Sorry to crash the Disney film y’all have going on… But do you want to go on a bike ride? It’s so quiet out!”

Erin and I agreed, and Guy drove my bike and I sat on the front handlebars as we whizzed through the streets of my neighborhood to his place. Everyone was outside, waving, and yelling their salutations as the wind blew in our hair.

We got to Guy’s place, which was in the lower level of an apartment complex. My butt took a beating on the ride over sitting on the handlebars but it was worth it. After dropping out bikes in the grass in front of his place we followed guy to his “storage unit” he had behind it. Guy opened the garage door and it was absolutely bursting at the seams with all sorts of outdated computer technology. Old drum machines that nobody cared about, a brokem synthesizer, balls and balls of cables and monitors piled on top of each other, piled on top of organs, jammed in between old couches, betamax players, overhead projectors, glass hippie lights that once hung from the ceiling, and piles and piles of old computer language books next to stacks of CD ROMs and VHS cassettes. Erin walked over to a box of 8 track cartridges. “What the hell are these? John Denver, Jimmy Buffet, you definitely got all the hits!” she said, holding one up in her hand. Guy responed with a look of disgust “You don’t know what 8 tracks are?”

“Can you even play these?” Erin continued

“Sure, I’ve got the player right there!” Guy exclaimed, as he bent over a tan torn up couch. He fished out a silver box, it was a Pioneer Stereo Receiver with a built in 8 track player, it had some inlaid fake wood in the front, and the silver was polished and glistened in the light. He pulled the cord free from the grip of the couch. He then pulled a couple small cabinet sized speakers free from an adjacent shelf. “Altec Lansing?” I said, speaking about the brand name plastered on the front. “Yeah, they’ve been around forever, since the 1920s” Guy said as he screwed the speakers wires to the back of the 8 track receiver unit. “Pick something out of the box” Guy instructed Erin as she rummaged through the box full of 8 tracks. “This looks badass” she said as she pulled out a white cartridge with what appeared to be an ink drawing of a large batwing shepherding a sea of skulls and other dark drawings. “Oh that’s Nazareth, Hair of the Dog, it’s a fantastic choice!” Guy piped up excitedly, grabbing the 8 track from Erin’s hand and jamming it into the front of the receiver, which was now glowing blue as he had plugged it into an outdoor outlet. The speakers began to cry out into the otherwise quiet atmostphere. A male rockstar voice screamed out into the void “now you’re messin with a… A sonofabitch! Now you’re messin with a sonofabitch!” Guy yelled over the speakers which were far too loud for pleasant company “They’re from fuckin Scotland!”

Erin and I both nodded our heads as the music continued to blare out. An older woman was walking by with her dog and took a hard look at us before walking up. “Oh Nazareth! I haven’t heard them in ages!” she exclaimed, and Guy and her both bobbed their heads with the music, looking at each other in the eye. They were from different generations but both shared the passion for kickass heavy metal music. Erin and I continued to sit there like we were in some sort of nature documentary, watching the madness unfold all around us. The woman, in her mid 40s was now playing air guitar as Guy continued to head bang and play air guitar. “A SONOFABITCH!” guy yelled out and the woman responded “NOW YOU”RE MESSIN WITH A SONOFABITCH!” the woman responded. Erin began to laugh, and her head fell onto my shoulder for a split second. I looked down at her and smiled back. She mouthed to me “What the fuck” and we both continued to watch the nature documentary unfold before us. The song ended, and the woman gave Guy a high five. He turned down the music as she began to peer into his storage unit. “Oh my ! This is all the best stuff! I didn’t know you kids cared about this stuff!” She picked an old atari controller in her hands. “Oh my what a treasure! “ she continued. Guy just kept on smiling. “Now that the internet is down, you’re the man!” she said in a jolly middle aged mom sort of way. The idea had never really hit me, but what if the internet never came back, or what if it were down for days? What would everyone do if they couldn’t play their games or stream their films? Guy had thousands of movies, and music, and projectors, and everything else we had all taken for granted. Everything in that garage could be stored on a single laptop computer, which could be folded and put in a backpack. It wasn’t even on the computer, but in a cloud somewhere, streaming. The music didn’t even exist as an MP3 on a computer anywhere. But what Guy had still resonated with them. Why? Music was still music. Why did it matter if it was played on an 8 track, or an LP, or streamed on Spotify? Guy was now finagling an old ten speed bike out from underneath a pile of records. The middle aged mom continued to sway back and forth with her eyes closed as “Love Hurts!” sang out through the speakers. Erin looked at me shaking her head and smiling.

Guy had got the bike out of the garage now, and the woman was now serenading Erin and I with her own off key rendition of “Love Hurts! Love Scars! Love Wounds! And marks!” We looked at her, and felt a bit of our own destiny in her goofy movements. The song came to an end, and she thanked Guy for showing her his collection, and made her way down the driveway back onto the sidewalk, still moving her hips and quietly singing to herself. Guy was pumping up the tires of his bike with an ancient bicycle pump. The rotten old tires sprung back into life, and within a few minutes we were all riding together into the cool evening breeze. But in the back of our heads, the incident, and all we had been through still lurked. Had we shut off all the power? What would happen when it came back on, and rebooted? We tried to push these thoughts back into our minds as we careened down a hill.

[mischiefandspirits]

She Never Felt Alone

Part of the Cat of a Different Color series

With Allura all healed up, the team decide on their next move. It was supposed to be a quick in and out mission. Instead one of their own ends up captured while another ends up at deaths door. Can the team save them both before it's too late?

Part 1: Just Kitten and Get Out

Things seem to be going fine, then they don’t.

“Come on. Hold still for just a few more seconds.”

<Why did I agree to do this, again?>

<You said you wanted to spend more time together.>

<More time with you. Not him. And certainly not while playing dress up.>

<You look adorable though!>

“He’s right, you do!”

Merla hissed at both Blue and his paladin.

“Yeah, yeah. You're all done, mopey cat. What do you think?”

Merla turned to the mirror and looked herself over.

“Has she always been like this or is it Keith’s influence?” she heard Lance whisper.

<If anything, she influenced Keith. Also, you know she can hear you, right? Cat ears.>

Merla snorted and turned to the side, still looking in the mirror.

Well, she supposed it wasn't nearly as constricting as the armor, and the train felt light enough that it wouldn't tangle with her legs or weigh down her tail if she needed to run.

She'd still rather not wear it.

Lance’s bedroom door opened and the three looked up to see Keith standing in the doorway.

He blinked at the scene in front of him, bemused. “What are you doing? And what is Merla wearing?”

Lance smiled and reached over to adjust the train of the cheetah’s red and white dress. “I'm making the cats fancy clothes. You know, so if we have another party like on Arus.”

“Why would they need fancy clothes?”

“So they'll look fancy. Look at them, running around naked like wild animals!”

“They technically are wild animals. Physically, at least.”

“That doesn't mean they have to look it. They don't even have collars!”

“Merla bit Shiro the one and only time he tried to put a collar on her. He almost needed stitches. Speaking of which, how did you get that on her in the first place?”

Lance winked at him. “What can I say, I have a way with the ladies.”

Keith sent him an unconvinced look. “Blue talked her into it?”

“He may or may not have had a hand in it,” Lance shrugged.

“Thought so.”

“So what do you think? Merla likes it!” Lance said, holding his arms out.

<I did not say that.>

Keith shook his head, a smile tugging at his lips. “I think it's unnecessary and pointless, but by the looks of it you're going to be making the cats entire wardrobes.”

“Why not? Blue’s practically got his own closet back at home filled with lil cat clothes.”

<Seriously?>

<I like looking pretty, thank you very much. And don't act like you don't like to be pampered in your own ways.>

<That is not the point!>

“That's… I don't know what that is,” Keith chuckled. “Anyways, play time's over. Allura and Shiro want us all on the bridge.

<Freedom!> Merla cheered, phasing through the clothes and darting out the door.

The three stared after her before Lance carefully picked up the dress. “I guess that's one way to get it off without messing up the pins.”

“I’m sorry, Princess, did you say we ?” Keith asked, turning to Allura.

“I’m going with you. I’ve traveled through the Galra transportation hubs many times with my father before the war began. I know more about them than any of you.”

<She’s got a point,> Pua agreed.

<Oh please, she walked around with an escort. She’s never had to be sneaky. Hunk has way more experience sneaking through military buildings than her. Plus that was a long time ago. They’ve probably changed floor plans since then,> Merla snorted.

“Princess, I’d rather you stay here,” Coran said.

<Agreed,> Ryou huffed.

<By the Anodites, Merla and Ryou agree on something,> Chip hissed quietly to Blue and he shook with witheld laughter. <Is it time for the Great Shadowing?>

“I’m a part of this fight against Zarkon as much as anyone. I’m going. Does anyone have a problem with that?”

The paladins all looked away from the princess.

<Me!> Merla chirped. <Ryou too. Keith, tell her that!>

Keith glared down at her. No, he mouthed. He liked living, thanks.

Coran turned to Shiro with a worried look.

Shiro shrugged. “Fine. Suit up.”

Coran shrieked and the paladins shot Shiro shocked expressions.

<Come on, guys. The princess knows how to fight. She’ll be fine,> Blue growled.

<Love, being able to fight is low on the list of necessary skills for a spy. The best spies don’t even have to fight.>

<I’m with Blue, you guys are being too hard on her,> Pua snorted.

<I have a bad feeling about this,> Chip sighed.

“He’s still looking. I think he’s waiting for a signal or something,” Lance whispered.

“I got it.” Hunk crawled out from under the console and held up one of the sentinels. He used the wires on it’s disconnected arm to make it greet the Galra on the screen, pretend to type at the console, then point at the Galra, then give him a thumbs up.

The Galra held his hand up in acceptance before ending the call.

<I can’t believe that worked,> Chip said as Hunk sighed.

“Nice job, Hunk.”

“Thanks,” Hunk said, giving Lance a high five with the robot hand.

“Okay, download complete,” Pidge announced and everyone crowded around her.

“What’s it say?” Keith asked.

“Nothing. This place doesn’t have any useful information. Just a schedule of the ships coming in and out.”

“Well, I guess this mission was a bust,” Lance said.

“Let’s get back to the Castle,” Shiro commanded.

“Hold on. Pidge, do you know where that ship is headed?” Allura asked, pointing at the one that had just arrived.

“Um, it’s scheduled to be here for about a half an hour, then head off to Central Command.”

“That’s where they have the information we need, and I’m going to sneak aboard that ship and get it for us.”

<By the Anodites,> Merla groaned.

<Called it,> Chip sighed.

“What? No way!” Lance exclaimed.

“How are you going to get in?” Keith asked, looking skeptical.

Allura pulled off her helmet. “I’m going to walk right through the front.” She closed her eyes and her skin faded to a soft violet and her limbs stretched until she was more than a head taller than all the paladins.

<That’ll help,> Ryou noted as the paladins gasped. <Still a terrible idea.>

“How the heck did you do that?” Hunk asked.

“The Alteans are a chameleon-like people who can blend in with the local populations. It’s the ability that’s made us great explorers and diplomats throughout our history.”

<Actually, chameleons change color mostly in response to mood or to regulate temperature. A better comparison would be certain cephalopods, like cuttlefish.> The cats turned to Blue, who held up his nose. <What? Yeah, I know things. You got a problem with that?>

<Once an organic nerd, always an organic nerd,> Merla purred, cuddling up against him.

<Got that right!>

“No, just one at a time, and I will need a change of costume,” Allura replied to Lance, Hunk, and Pidge as the cats refocused. She turned to the Galra Shiro had knocked out. “I can use his uniform as a disguise.”

“I can’t let you go in there alone.”

“Excuse me?” Allura turned to Shiro with a defiant expression.. “I do not need your permission.”

<Oh snap!>

<Chip, no.>

“It’s too dangerous. I’m going in with you.”

“You will stick out like a choferiak’s nose.”

“You’re going to need that nose, princess,” Pidge stepped in. “Shiro’s hand is made from Galra tech. It’s the only thing we have that will allow us to interface with their systems and gather intel. I can monitor the download remotely from here.”

<If only we had someone properly sneaky that could work Galra tech!>

Merla bit down on Blue’s ear.

“Fine, you can come.”

“Uh, you guys better hurry up if you want to get on and off before the ship leaves for Zarkon central,” Hunk pointed out.

The two turned to go and Keith asked, “How are you going to get Shiro on board?”

The two shared a look.

“Oh! Laundry cart!” Lance explained, earning confused looks all around. “Like, you know in those break out movies when the prisoners hide in the laundry carts in order to sneak out! Shiro could hide in one of those crates they’re loading onto the ship and Allura could push it onboard! Like a laundry cart!”

Keith and Allura still looked a bit confused, but Pidge nodded. “That could work. Might be a tight fit. I'm pretty sure those things aren't filled with cloth.”

“It's our best bet though,” Shiro sighed. “Alright, Allura, get changed.”

The princess got to work pulling the Galra’s armor off while Shiro turned to the others.

“You guys stay here and stay hidden. Pidge, try and see if you can get any other information out of here.”

“Right.”

He turned to Ryou with a smirk. “You wouldn't stay here even if I told you to, would you?”

Ryou snorted and pressed up against his side.

“Didn't think so. Just stay close. We don't know what would happen if the Galra got their hands on one of you.

<Could they even keep us contained?> Pua asked.

<Doubtful, but we still should be careful,> Ryou replied.

“I’m ready,” Allura said, coming in fully armored.

“Alright, let’s go.”

<I wanna go on record saying that this is a terrible idea.>

Merla couldn’t say she hated being right. Actually, she loved it. What she did hate, however, was when being right came with a cost.

Things had been going fine. They’d snuck in, quietly taken down the sentinels guarding the room, discovered that the Galra had somehow been able to tap into a new source of quintessence (or at least she hoped it was a new source. If they had once more reached the Lifelight then the team had more problems to worry about then they’d thought), and stolen a vial of refined quintessence off a cart.

And then the weirdo in the hood that reeked of dark magic appeared next to Keith and everything went downhill.

<Keith!> Merla growled. She pounced at at the druid that blasted Keith, but they teleported away.

They appeared next to the vial of refined quintessence Keith had dropped when he flew back and picked it up.

“Okay, plan B!” Keith shouted, leaping to his feet and drawing his bayard. They both charged the druid, only for them to teleport away again after setting the vial on a new cart.

After nearly getting her head sliced off on accident, Merla fell back, watching Keith chase about the appearing and disappearing druid until they disappeared and didn’t come back.

<Where’d they go?> she hissed, looking around.

“There,” Keith called, jumping aside as violet lightning rained down on them.

With the druid’s focus on Keith, Merla jetpacked to where the druid was. She latched onto the shocked druid just as they tried to teleport again.

She felt her armor fall away and her physical form disintegrate as her quintessence was pulled along with the druid. She felt her quintessence brush against that of the druid. She felt their pain-surprise-confusion-pain-fear-curiosity-pain-anger-curiosity-pain-fear-anger-pain-curiosity. She felt them return to the physical plane and she returned to her physical form, digging her fangs into their shoulder.

They let out a shout and blasted her off with magic. She flew backwards, slamming into a case of quintessence. She heard Keith call out to her as the glass shattered and the quintessence poured over her.

Then everything went white.

“I think we’re in trouble.”

“You think?”

<Now’s not the time for fighting,> Ryou huffed.

Allura looked around the room before taking a few steps back. “Okay, stand aside.”

“What? Why? What are you-”

Allura rushed forwards, slamming the door off the track and plowing into the guard standing outside. The boys followed her out as she yanked the gun out of the unconscious Galra’s hands. Ryou sent an impressed look to the helmet embedded into the wall before turning to his paladin, who was gaping at the princess.

Ryou snorted as she asked, “What?”

Shiro just looked her up and down.

He finally snapped out of it as a group of sentinels turned a corner and began charging them.

“Let’s go!” They took off down the hall and Shiro called into the comm, “Pidge, fire up the Green Lion! We’re coming in hot!”

They stopped as a pair of sentinels appeared in front of them. Allura tried to shoot them and Ryou dropped to the floor to avoid the blasts that flew out and hit one of the sentinels behind them. Shiro quickly stepped in to take down the two. As the others approached, Allura grabbed one of the fallen and tossed it, knocking down the others.

“I thought you said you’d traveled around the galaxy,” Shiro said, grabbing the gun from her and turning it around. “I mean, you fly a spaceship. How could you possibly not know how to hold this correctly?”

“I’m tense. This is a tense situation,” Allura snapped, grabbing the gun in one hand and his arm in the other before dragging him away.

They paused as the realized no one was following them. They turned to see Ryou still collapsed on the floor.

“Black, come on. We need to get moving.”

The liger whined, but didn’t move.

“Ryou, what’s wrong?” Shiro asked, coming to his side.

“Secure hatches. All personnel take positions for departure.”

Allura looked up at the announcement before shoving the gun back into Shiro’s hands. She scooped Ryou into her arms, saying, “We can’t stay here.”

“R-right.” Shiro took the lead. He made sure Allura was keeping up before calling into the others. “Guys, something’s wrong with Ryou.”

“He’s not the only one. All three of ours suddenly just collapsed before disappearing on us. Pua and Chip were gone right away and Blue only stuck around long enough to tell Lance they’d gone back to the lions before disappearing as well.”

“It’s not just Ryou. Chip, Pua, and Blue were also affected,” Shiro explained for Allura’s sake.

“What could be causing this?”

“Your guess is as good as mine. Ryou, you should head back to the Black Lion and rest.”

Ryou gave a weak growl and pawed at Allura’s shoulder.

The princess gave him a sad smile and pressed her head against his. “We’ll be okay Black. Go on. You’re in no condition to fight.”

“She’s right. We’ve got this. Head back. Once we get back to the castle, Pidge can run a diagnostic and hopefully figure out what happened.”

As Ryou finally relented and disappeared, Pidge called through the comms, “Shiro, we’re at the Green Lion. We’re going to-”

Shiro gave her a moment to continue before calling her name.

“Sorry, I'm fine.”

“You collapsed! She collapsed, Shiro!” Hunk added with a worried voice. “Lance is helping her into her seat because she can barely stand on her own!”

“I'm fine. It's just Chip. I can feel her better in here. It's… They're hurting bad. It’s like pain and exhaustion and numbness and lightheadedness all rolled into one. I… I don’t…”

“It’s okay, Pidge. Can you guys fly?”

“Yeah, we’re heading out.”

“Good.” Shiro ducked as laser fire shot past them. “This way!” he told Allura turning them down a side hallway.

“Are you alright?” Allura asked.

“Yeah, just worried about the lions. Do you have any idea what this could be? I didn’t think they could get sick.”

“Neither did I. But then, we never thought they could speak or create other forms either. My father had always just assumed it was an odd result of mixing the material the lions were made of with Altean science. A sort of accidental AI. To think that they could be thinking, feeling creatures capable of intelligent communication is… astounding! I don’t think my father ever had any idea of what they are capable of, let alone Coran or I.”

“Then what are we supposed to do?”

Allura bowed her head a little. “I suppose all we can do is what you suggested. Have Pidge, Hunk, and Coran run some tests and hope for the best.”

Shiro nodded with a shaky breath. A shot nearly grazed his side and he shook himself. Right, focus. We need to get out of here and then I can worry.

Allura turned to shoot at the sentinels chasing them as Shiro turned a corner and called out, “The escape pods are up here!”

“Formulating navigation. All crew assume secure hyper-speed positions.”

Panting, Allura pulled the Galra helmet off her head. “Hurry! We can't leave once the ship goes into hyper-speed!”

“Sh-Shiro.”

“What is it?”

“I… I think we know why the lions are so messed up.”

“Why?” They ran into the escape pod hanger and Shiro set his hand on the door controls to shut them. “Hunk?”

“Shiro,” Lance said. “I think Merla’s dying.”

[twentysixdegrees]

writing sample 3. longing.

late December, 2016

When I look at the evening sunset, so much I miss you.

Recording the track is easy. She pulls from a longing that sits right at the side of her chest, right at the bottom of her heart. The first time she reads over the lyrics, she thinks of him, and as soon as she hears the melody her heart aches. It’s beautiful, melodic, and it reminds her of him so much – the beat is reminiscent of the steady metronome palpitation of his heart when she lays on his chest, his arm curled around her waist on those nights that they get to spend together (they’re few and far in between).

When the vocal director compliments her on her ad libs, she can only give him a small, sad, smile. Wheein blames it on just being tired, but she’s missing him. She channels all of that into her runs and her riffs, finally understanding how easy it is to make music when you’re inspired by heartbreak, or so absolutely infatuated with someone. For her, it’s the latter.

On days where the wind feels good, I – you, you, you, you, you.

January 18th, 2016

When I hear a good song, so much I miss you.

She texts him. It’s short and sweet, a little vague too – but his response makes her crack a genuine smile. He’s always a fool for her, especially when he senses that she needs it. And he always seems to know – Yoongi is just too good for her.

kkt : it’s not out yet, but when it does come out know that it’s about you kkt : i miss you!!

kkt : actually – hold that thought

Their hotel rooms are two floors apart. The Vietnamese coordinators for the Gala Event booked all of the Korean acts into the same hotel for easy transport tomorrow . It’s a stacked lineup, and then right after the concert they’re all being hustled onto planes back to South Korea for another performance. It’s a never ending grind, and sometimes they’re just so so close to each other but – they keep missing each other by just the tiniest margins. But she’s not going to let that happen tonight.

On starry nights, always, so much I miss you.

A kakao message to Taehyung, whom Yoongi is rooming with for the night, has her plan sparking into action. And Taehyung, ever the supportive dongsaeng to Yoongi, and friend of Wheein, agrees to crash with Jimin an Jeongguk tonight.

A hoodie and a snapback later, she is bidding goodbye to Hyejin who is psyched at having a hotel room to herself, and heading towards the elevators – pressing the ‘7′th button.

Wheein’s hair is wavy from the imprints of her hairtie in her previous bun, and she combs through the strands self-consciously. Her makeup might be a little smudged from the practice run, but she really doesn’t care. Her heart is just beating an unnatural beat, so incredibly excited at the potential of seeing Yoongi tonight.

kkt : delivery outside your door –

Waiting those few seconds is the hardest part. She hears her kkt notification on his phone through the thin wood of the door, laughs a little when she hears scrambling from the other side, but Wheein is smiling so widely that her dimples crease something deep near her mouth when Yoongi opens his hotel room door.

Your voice, so much I miss you.

“Hey,” she breathes, immediately stepping in closer.

He steps to the side, letting her in, and closes the door behind her. He looks about as stunned as she feels because all day – through the practice run throughs they’ve only caught glimpses of each other through monitors and screens, hear each other’s voices through speakers and walls but now –

Wheein moves first. She almost knocks the breath right out of him, she’s sure – but she tucks her arms under his and wraps herself around his torso, as close as she can get. Her face is pressed up against his neck and she noses at his jaw so slowly, smiling into his skin as his arms wrap around her body a second later, brain finally processing what is happening.

“I couldn’t take it anymore, not being able to hold you while you were so close.” Yoongi makes her so weak, and she doesn’t know how much longer she can keep this up. One of her sunbaes had seen the way she had looked at the monitor when the camera panned over to Yoongi, and had assured her without having to delve too deeply, that it gets easier with time. Missing him.

But Wheein calls bullshit.

It only gets harder for her. Because at first it was sweet and cute, a little secret that only they knew but as things started to get more serious, she started to realize that she was okay – no,much more than okay – with the idea of spending weeks, months, years, with Yoongi.

She’s fallen so, so, deep.

“It’s almost our one year,” Yoongi navigates them towards the bed, laughing quietly when she steps up onto his feet, essentially letting him carry them both to the hotel bed. “Of course you would miss me.” He pries her hands off of him, and gently coaxes her onto the bed, her legs hanging off the sides as he holds her hands, kissing her fingers that lace over his. “Were you the reason Tae left so suddenly?

At the small, shy, nod, Yoongi just laughs a little harder, the sound so raspy and low that it fills her stomach with butterflies, all over again, like it’s the first time she’s plunged so far in love with someone (and perhaps – considering everything…it is).

Wheein lets go of his hand to tap at the middle of her lips, her snapback falling back onto the bed, off her head, as he leans down to kiss her. Her hair seems to sprawl onto the white bedsheets with a life of its own, but she doesn’t care at all. Because she’s responding to the soft pecks that he’s laying upon her mouth, little brief touches that have her trying to sit up, just to chase him for more.

Yesterday and today, so much I miss you.

They end up moving further up the bed, Wheein tossing her sweatshirt up and over her head as Yoongi crawls over the fluffy sheets, chasing after her, who is crawling back. Laughs and quiet words are exchanged, traded, as Yoongi helps her wriggle out of her sweatpants, handing Wheein her phone when he feels the weight of it in the pocket.

It’s a little concerning, how easily they move in tandem, and how nicely they work together – but sooner rather than later, Yoongi is lying down in bed, warm under the covers with Wheein lying on his shoulder, head tucked right where his shoulder meets. His hand combs through her hair soothingly, and they just simply lay like that, soaking in each other’s presence.

“We have a song coming out, as a pre-release, soon. When you listen to it – know that I’m singing about you, okay?” Wheein turns her head up to look at him, and is surprised with a chaste kiss to her lips. Her eyes widen slightly, and she is so taken aback that he starts to grin at her, the expression pulling his lips up fondly.

“Whenever I do my rap in Run, know that I’m thinking about you –”

Wheein proceeds to lightly smack him on the chest. “Stop that. Your rap in Run is sad!” She reaches up to kiss his jaw. “Don’t be over-dramatic, I’m returning your feelings, aren’t I?”

…

I – you, you, you, you, you.

[chuffyfan87]

Hiding. Part 13a

Cowritten with @disastrousintention

-x-

Once Duffy had gone to the hospital, Charlie tried to reassure Peter as much as possible that his mum was in the best possible hands. He was sat in the living room, staring at the phone, the phonebook beside him, looking at Kate’s number. Taking a deep breath he dialled the number and waited as it rang. After what seemed like forever a groggy sounding voice answered.

"Hello?"

“Hi Kate. Sorry to disturb you so late.”

"Charlie? Is something the matter with Lisa? One of the boys?"

“It’s Lisa.” He paused. “She’s not well, she’s had to be taken to hospital. She’s unresponsive.”

"What does that mean in plain English? Is she going to be OK?" She demanded.

“I don’t know. I’m not there.” He replied.

"Do you need me to look after the boys? Is that why you've called?"

“Please Kate. If you don’t mind. I have Louis here too. I can always ring Baz if it’s too much trouble.”

"Its fine. I'll be over as soon as I can get a taxi."

“Thank you Kate. Thank you.”

They said their goodbyes and hung up the phone. Charlie felt a little calmer, now knowing the boys were going to be looked after. He placed his head in his hands. He was still sat like that half an hour later when there was a knock at the door. Pushing himself up he got the keys off the side and unlocked the door. “Hi Kate, come in.”

Kate walked through to the lounge and sat down. "What happened?"

“I don’t know. I came from putting the boys to bed and she was unresponsive on the sofa.” He closed the door behind Kate as she entered the flat. “Paramedics think it could be an infection of some sort.”

"Unresponsive? Does that mean she was asleep?" Kate asked, trying to wrap her head around it all. When she'd last seen Lisa the previous day everything had seemed OK. The only thing of note that she could remember was that she'd noticed that Lisa had piled on yet more weight, clearly this baby was destined to be bigger than either of its brothers!

“I shook her but she wouldn’t wake up. That’s when I knew it was serious.” He sighed sadly, “This pregnancy’s been tougher than the last two.” He admitted.

"Yes, well, she's brought a lot of that stress on herself quite frankly." Kate sighed. "You'd best head to the hospital and see what's going on."

He nodded, choosing to ignore Kate's remark. “Thanks again Kate. I appreciate it.” He smiled sadly.

She nodded and began busying herself with her handbag.

Charlie grabbed his car keys and left. He was a nervous wreck in the car on the way to the hospital, still clueless over Duffy’s current condition. As he pulled into his usual parking space he spotted a familar face stood near the entrance to A+E. He got out of the car and locked it, heading up to the figure outside the department.

"I heard about what happened on the radio. I thought you'd be here soon so wanted to wait for you."

“Thanks mate.” He sighed, rubbing his hand across his face. “She was fine... and then...” He trailed off.

"It came on suddenly then?" Josh clarified.

He nodded, “Yeah it did. Do you know how is she?”

Josh hesitated slightly. "They've done all the usual tests. She's responding to painful stimulus now but still not fully conscious."

“And the baby?” He swallowed, he felt sick.

"So far it seems to be unaffected but they're monitoring the situation closely."

He breathed a sigh of relief. “I feel so helpless Josh.” He admitted quietly.

Josh placed his hand on Charlie's shoulder. "I know mate, I know. It's almost worst knowing as much as we do when you're in these kinds of situations." He paused. "I knocked off 20 minutes ago, do you, um, want me to hang around for a bit?"

He nodded, “Please, if you don’t mind? Thanks. There’s, um, something I need to discuss with someone.” He rubbed the back of his neck, a classic sign he was worried.

"No problem mate."

“Thanks.” He turned to head into the department.

Josh followed quietly, allowing Charlie the space he needed but also staying close to offer what support he could. Charlie went to his office, and gestured to Josh to go inside. Josh headed into the office and stood awkwardly by the desk wondering what Charlie was about to say.

“If I tell you, it can’t go any further ok?” He quietly closed the door as Charlie entered the office himself.

Now Josh was really worried. "Of course, not a word."

“I don’t know if Peter witnessed or at least heard, what went on between his parents. But I think he may have done.” He blurted out.

"You told me that Duffy swore Andrew was never violent in front of the boys." Josh replied, deeply concerned and confused.

“That’s because she did.” He swallowed. “Tonight when I couldn’t wake Duffy. Peter asked if it was because she’d bumped her head like last time. And also...” he paused, “He said I knew I wouldn’t hit his mum like dad did.”

Josh was lost for words. He'd been horrified to discover that his friend had been assaulted by her husband but to now discover that it had happened in front of her children... As a paramedic Josh had obviously witnessed the results of such incidents more times that he cared to think about but he'd never dreamed it would ever involve a friend.

“I don’t know what to do.” He swallowed again, “Obviously I can’t and won’t ever tell Duffy what Peter told me.”

"It would break her heart. Especially if she doesn't know." Josh agreed.

“Exactly. And I can’t do that to her.” He explained. “What do I do?” He asked.

"Peter is going to need help dealing with everything he's witnessed. You can't do that behind his mum's back."

“I wanted to ask him more but-“ He shrugged, “It wasn’t the right time. And what if I make things worse?”

"Maybe have a chat to someone from social services. Off the record. See what they suggest?"

He nodded, “Thank you.” There was a silence as Charlie placed his hands in his pockets, “I bumped into Megan at the fair.”

Josh caught the look in his friend's eye. "Oh please tell me you'd already told her about you and Duffy?"

“It never seemed the right moment!”

"I'm presuming Duffy was with you at the fair..?"

“Yes she was.” He smiled, “It was a lovely day! The five of us.”

"And its quite obvious now that it's not going to be just the five of you for much longer." Josh remarked pointedly.

Charlie gave Josh a look that confirmed his friend's suspicions. “Will you come with me while I find out how Duffy is?” He asked, desperate to see Duffy now he’d shared exactly what was on his mind.

Josh could see that Charlie was purposefully avoiding saying more about his conversation with Megan. Not doubt he'd gotten an ear bashing from her. "Of course I'll come."

“Thank you.” Charlie left the office and went to find one of the doctors, he needed to know what was happening.

Entering admin Charlie spotted Sean stood writing up some notes. "How is she?"

Sean looked up. "Max is in with her now. Chloe's been doing neuro obs."

“Can I see her?”

"I'm sure that wouldn't be an issue. She's still in resus under observation."

“Thank you.” Charlie glanced at Josh and hesitantly made his way to Resus. He wouldn’t show it but he was scared.

As they reached the doors Josh reached out a hand and placed it on Charlie's shoulder. "I'm gunna stay out here. Give you some space."

“Thank you.” He whispered to Josh as he took a deep breath, steadied his nerves and entered Resus.

Max looked up as he heard the doors open.

“How is she?”

"We're still waiting on test results but she seems severely dehydrated. I'm concerned about her kidney function. Also the fact that she's still yet to properly regain consciousness."

He nodded, for a moment not being able to speak. Why hadn’t he encouraged fluids with her? He was a nurse... He shouldn’t have even allowed her to get herself into this position. “Can I sit with her?”

"Of course. Do you happen to have her copy of her maternity notes with you? Obstetrics are being slow to send down their copy and there's some things I want to check."

“No I haven’t. I... I didn’t think to bring them. Sorry.” He paused, “What seems to be the problem?”

Max hesitated. "I'm not an obstetrician but the baby feels smaller than I'd expect at this stage and it appears there's an excess of fluid." He paused. "It might not just be Duffy's kidneys we need to be concerned about so I wanted to check if there's any mention of it in her notes."

“You’re saying there could be something wrong with the baby?”

"Its possible. Its probably nothing to worry about but I would feel happier if we investigated all possibilities thoroughly."

He nodded. It did nothing to help the sick feeling swirling around his stomach. He sat down beside the bed and placed his hand in Duffy’s, “I’m here now.” He said quietly to her, stroking his thumb over the back of her hand. Maybe it was wishful thinking but he swore she reacted to his touch. “Wake up baby,” He whispered, “Please.”

Max stepped back towards Duffy and checked some of the monitors. His eyebrow rose, he had not expected such a reaction. He decided to try something to test his hunch. "Can you shake her shoulder for me?" He asked Charlie.

He looked up at Max and listened to what was being asked of him. “Sure.” He stood up and placed his right hand on her left shoulder and gently shook her.

A few moments passed of nothing. "Try one more time. Firmer this time."

As instructed, he did it again.

A small groan filled the air.

"Duffy?"

Another groan, slightly stronger this time.

Charlie moved his hand from her shoulder and gently stroked her cheek.

Duffy's eyelids fluttered but her eyes remained closed.

“Open your eyes,” He encouraged.

Her nose wrinkled. It was obvious that she wasn't keen to cooperate.

He shook his head fondly and lent forward and kissed the end of her nose. “Stop being bloody awkward and stubborn!”

Her eyes finally flickered open.

“Hello gorgeous, you gave us all quite a fright.” He said sadly. Inside he was just relieved that she was awake.

She flicked her eyes around the room. What the hell was she doing here?

Following her gaze around the room, Charlie smiled sadly. “You’re severely dehydrated.”

Panic lit up in her eyes at his words. She tried to move her hand, still too tired and weak to speak.

Seeing the panic, Charlie took her hand and reassured her. “The boys are with your mum and the baby is ok.”

The news visibly relaxed her. She started to close her eyes again.

Max interceeded. "No falling asleep again. I need to run some checks."

“Stay awake for a little while longer, please.” He stroked her cheek again, perched on the edge of the bed.

She levelled a glare at both men. It was weaker than usual but still there. Why wouldn't they just leave her be? She was so tired!

Charlie smiled at the glare. That was his girl! “I know you’re tired baby but please.” He kissed her forehead.

She sighed and stared up at the ceiling. There were so many other places she'd rather be - her own bed being high on that list - but she knew it was a battle she wasn't going to win.

“You’d do anything to get out of my plans of punishing you in bed, wouldn’t you?” He whispered quietly so only she would hear.

A small smile pulled at her lips.

“Like that, is it? I’ll get you back, sexy. Don’t you worry.” He planted a delicate kiss to her lips.

As he pulled back she stuck out her tongue.

He rolled his eyes playfully, “You’re such a child.” He stuck out his own tongue.

"I hate to break up this lovely moment but I need to check your obs Duffy." Max remarked.

Charlie smiled and moved out of the way.

Max carried out the required checks, making notes and nodding to himself as he did so. He then left them to chase up obstetrics.

“I love you.” He said quietly, “Please don’t scare me like that, again.”

"Sorry." She whispered.

“You’re forgiven.” There was a comfortable silence between them for a couple of minutes. “How are you feeling?”

"It hurts." She whispered.

“Where? Where hurts?”

"My back." She complained, attempting to shift positions on the bed.

“Lower back?” He helped her find a more uncomfortable position.

She nodded, gritting her teeth as she moved. She gasped.

“Pain still in your lower back?”

She nodded, tears forming in her eyes.

"Let me go get Max to give you some more pain relief." Charlie suggested.

"No!"

“Why?”

"I couldn't wake up last time." She replied, her voice weak and small sounding.

“Oh honey.” He sighed sadly, “But if you’re in pain, you need it.”

"I'll be OK if you stay with me."

“I’m not planning on going anywhere.”

"I'm scared." She whispered.

“What are you scared of?” He asked.

"Things going wrong for us."

“Is that what you think will happen?”

[tmnt-imagines]

What could go wrong: Donnie x Reader

WARNING: MILD SWEARING

Requested by: Anonymous

Could u write something about Donnie having an online girl friend for a relatively long time (like long enough to know he's a turtle and Skype him & they've met up b4 and stuff) but she's nervous-scared to meet the rest of his family?

A/N: Sorry it took so long, hope you like it :)

“So, do you guys wear the bandannas all of the time? Or is it like a ‘weekday only’ thing?” You laughed, watching Donatello’s face on the screen distort into a lopsided smile. 

“Ha ha ha.” He said flatly, though clearly amused by your attempt at a joke. 

You two had been in a sort of relationship for nearing 6 months; you’d met in an online gaming server, he’d complimented your skills, or something, after you’d defeated a boss together, and you’d made a comment about how much you’d love to be able to fight like that out of the game; upon hearing of Donnie’s ninja training you hardly stopped talking to him all night, and your love spawned from there. About a few months into the relationship you’d proposed skyping, which at first Donatello had been scared and nervous about, but once the whole turtle thing came out, the pair of you could hardly go a couple of hours without talking via cameras. He wasn’t as self conscious today as he had been at the start, he was aware of his green complexion and disfigured features, and how unattractive he probably was, but after weeks of you convincing him that you thought he was adorable just the way he was, and you loved him despite appearances, he had become far more relaxed in your company. 

Today was like any other, you’d woken up and barely half an hour later you’d grabbed your laptop and begun talking to Donnie. He told you about the patrol he went on last night, and how boring it was to have to listen to Mikey talk about his new video game that he’d completed, and you told him about how seriously uneventful work had been yesterday. You were peacefully content, until Donatello had to spring this on you. 

“Would you - uh - maybe want to - ya know - um - come to the lair - maybe - sometime.” He stumbled over his words like an obstacle course, and began fiddling with his fingers rather than looking at your face on his monitor. He always did this when he was nervous and trying to avoid hearing your answer to whatever innocent question he’d posed, and on most occasions you’d think it was utterly cute, but this was different, and you weren’t entirely sure how to go about replying to it. 

“To, like, meet your brothers?” You inquired slowly, beginning to become a bit nervous. You loved Donnie with all your heart, even if you’d only met him in person a handful of times, and you would do anything for him; but this, this was serious relationship stuff. You weren’t sure you were ready for that.

“Yeah, exactly!” Donatello finally looked up at the screen, with a hopeful smile. Only, he must have sensed your unease as that smile soon fell to a frown. “What’s wrong? Don’t - don’t you want to?” 

“No! No, it’s not that at all! It’s just - they’re your family, and I - I don’t want them to not like me, or something.” You mumbled, feeling stupid saying it aloud. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to meet the other turtles, all of them sounded brilliant and hilarious, and you were sure nothing would go wrong, but your anxiety of wanting to make a good impression, so that they’d approve of Donnie being with you, made you unsure of meeting them. 

“How could anyone not like you?” Donatello beamed, seemingly relieved that you hadn’t completely rejected the idea like he’d been afraid of. “Honestly sweetheart, there is nothing to worry about. They’ll love you!” 

Why the hell had you agreed to this? You were standing in the sewers, like a complete idiot, fiddling with the sleeves of your jumper and trying to think of any excuse to not have to walk into the lair. Donnie had taken you here once while the others had been out on patrol, or getting pizza with April, and admittedly you loved it. It was such a cool place, even if it was in the sewers, and you would have loved to spend more time here with Donnie if it weren’t for his family. You wanted to make a good impression, and you feared they may not like you - some random human girl Donnie had brought into their lives. What if they thought you would divulge their secret? What if they thought you were too big of a risk? What if they just didn’t like you?

It was all eating away at your stomach, and you became incredibly aware that they were only a few feet away, probably about ready to tell Donnie to break things off between you. If it hadn’t been for Donatello, you probably would have pegged it by now. But he wanted this - he wanted you to meet his family, and be a part of his world, and you wanted to make him happy. And if that meant facing his brothers, and his dad, then you would have to face them sooner or later. 

The lair was spectacular, all bright lights and random knickknacks, which the 4 turtles had accumulated in their years of living down here - it was like something out of a movie. The sound of rattling chains and thumping echoed from above, and you could vaguely recall Donnie mentioning that Raphael is always beating up his boxing bag, if he’s got nothing else to do; so you put the noises down to that being the red clad turtle in the makeshift gym upstairs. You could also hear faint voices, which sounded like it could be the other two brothers arguing over the TV: “but I wanna watch-” “-I don’t care what you wanna watch, Mikey, give me the remote!” The sounded like typical brotherly banter, and you almost smiled thinking about what a close family they seemed to be, even in the midst of a petty argument. 

You stepped forward to find you’d been right, sat on the couch were two of Donnie’s brothers - or rather the blue clad turtle, Leonardo, was sat on the couch and the orange one, Michelangelo, was scrambling around whilst being held under one of Leo’s arms. You laughed aloud at them, and watched both of their blue eyes spring to you, and suddenly the laughing stopped. 

“You must be Y/N!” Mikey sprung from his brother’s capture, and ran over to greet you. He was almost 6 foot tall, and given your short height you had to look up to meet his gaze, “the names Michelangelo - but you can call me Mikey.” He winked with a cheesy grin, and you laughed again. 

“Or you can call him an idiot and ignore him like the rest of us.” Leonardo smirked, and came to stand beside his younger brother. He shoved him out of the way, and looked down at you with a warm smile. “Leo.” 

“It’s nice to meet you,” You smile politely, feeling like there is an earthquake taking place in your stomach under the scrutiny of their eyes. Where the bloody hell is Donnie?

“Finally. Donnie’s kept you away long enough,” Sounded the voice of the third brother, Raphael, as he jumped down from a nearby ledge, which led to his gym area.

“That’s Raph - I ignore him too,” Leonardo whispered to you, now standing at your side and watching as the red clad turtle came over as well. 

“Ironic - your the leader yet none of us listen to ya.” Raph snarled with a sly smile and set his green eyes on you. “Donnie’s gone to fetch April and Casey, he should be back in a sec,” 

As if your stomach wasn’t doing enough back flips already, now you’re being told your boyfriend, who invited you to spend the evening with his family, is not even home. You bet he timed that perfectly, and you made a mental note to hit him for it later. 

You’d met April and Casey before, two of Donnie’s human companions. It was nice to have normal people to talk to about the abnormal lives of your boyfriend and his family, and they seemed like nice enough people; it would have been slightly reassuring to know there would be familiar faces around, if they had actually been here, rather than being elsewhere and forcing you to spend god knows how long in the company of three mutant turtles whom you had never before had anything to do with. 

“She’s pretty,” You heard Michelangelo whisper to his older bother behind you, while Leo led you to the couch.

“Shut it, dude, she’s Donnie’s girl,” Raphael shot back quickly, and you could have sworn you heard the sound of his hand slap across the back of Mikey’s head.

“I’m just observing.” Mikey retorted defensively, probably rubbing his now sore head. Leo turned around and mouthed something to them, which you didn’t quite catch but you presumed it was something along the lines of ‘shut up’.

“Told you,” Raphael scoffed quietly, and from the tone of his voice you’d bet he was smirking. 

“Will you two cut it out, you’re embarrassing her!” Leonardo turned around and pushed Raph’s arm in annoyance, trying to keep his voice low enough for you not to hear it, but instead you did and simply giggled to yourself at their behaviour. 

“We ain’t doin’ anythin!” Raphael growled back at his older brother, narrowing his eyes, seemingly oblivious to you watching the three of them go at it. “Least I ain’t.” Raph turned to his orange clad companion.

“What have I done?” Mikey said in shock, “you were the one-”

“Shut up Mikey!” Both Raph and Leo sighed in unison, and made you laugh again. They all turned to face you shamefully, realising all that had just been discussed had been overheard by you.

“I may not be a mutant, but I do have hearing,” You stated with a sheepish grin, and the three turtles chuckled at your comment. 

“I like this one,” Mikey said, not very quickly, to his brothers, and grinned in your direction. 

“Yeah, me too.” Leonardo stated, and came to join you and his brothers on the couch for a game of Halo before Donnie got back.

“I TOTALLY KICKED YOUR ASS!” You screamed, throwing the controller onto the couch and getting up from your seat to celebrate. Leonardo, who’s ass you had kicked along with Mikey’s, was burying his head in his hands dramatically, while you rubbed it in. “HIGH FIVE RAPH! Oh, wait, umm high...three?” You laughed, holding your hand up only to find Raphael was seemingly missing a couple digits. To which him and his brothers erupted into a chorus of laughter.

“What the hell’s happening here?” Donatello asked, shuffling into the lair with a couple of boxes of pizza. “You seem to have made some friends,” He slung an arm over your shoulder, and pulled you close; pecking your forehead affectionately. Boy were you glad to see him. 

Without a second thought, you punched his plastron with an evil smile. “What was that for?” Donnie squealed, though you were sure it hadn’t hurt him at all, only caught him off guard.

“Leaving me alone with them,” You whispered, for no real reason except that it made this conversation feel more intimate, given the others were more distracted by the pizza and the rematch Leonardo was trying to orchestrate. 

“They weren’t that bad, were they?” Donnie chuckled, his eyes twinkling behind his glasses.

“No, but I still felt like hitting you.” You giggled, and stretched up to place a sweet kiss on his lips. Maybe being a part of this family wasn’t anything to be worried about after all. 

[burclay]

Heartbeats: Chapter 12

Without waiting for an answer, she strode to the door and flung it open. Rose followed, Yaz and Cleis close on her heels, and Ryan and Graham trailing behind. As she stepped out of the TARDIS, Rose saw Sappho striding towards them, her expression the fierce anger Rose had once associated with her own mother, seeing the TARDIS after some time away. Before anyone had the chance to say even a single word, Sappho pulled her hand back and slapped the Doctor across the face.

AO3 Chapter 1

Three days in Cardiff passed quickly, although nothing was ever quick enough for the Doctor. Rose was content to go to museums and shop; the Doctor went back and forth between wandering with Rose and the others and checking up on the TARDIS as if she didn’t know down to the second when it would be ready. Still, eventually she and Rose and the others were standing in the console room, gathered around the brightly glowing central column.

“Any minute now,” the Doctor said. Rose could practically feel the Doctor’s impatient energy vibrating in the space between them; the Doctor had leaned almost all the way over the console, her gaze fixed on the crystal.

Finally, the crystal pulsed, there was a beep from the TARDIS and a bit of a telepathic prod, and the Doctor jumped back and immediately crashed to the ground in her excitement. Rose, laughing, offered a hand, which the Doctor took, pulling herself to her feet already halfway through a sentence.

“Right,” she was saying. “Brilliant. So, where do we go next? Suppose we should probably pay a visit to ancient Greece, just so Sappho knows we didn’t run away with her daughter forever. By the way, Cleis, did you want to stick around? Or we could always do a couple of quick trips on the way. Eventually we’ll have to go back to Sheffield, clean up a bit, but that can happen anytime. Time travel, you know.”

Cleis was looking at Yaz in confusion. Yaz gave her an encouraging nod, eyebrows raised, and Cleis turned back to the Doctor.

“I’d like to stay,” she said. “If that’s okay.”

“You have to understand it’s dangerous,” the Doctor warned, her face suddenly serious. “You have to be sure.”

Rose could see the sadness in her eyes, suddenly, and remembered the rage that had been in the eyes of the Doctor she had first traveled with. The rage had settled into sadness, and that had been an improvement at the time, but… it had been a thousand years since then, and Rose’s heart hurt to think of the Doctor in pain for all that time.

“I’m sure,” Cleis said. “I mean, I’ve talked about it with Yaz.”

“Brilliant,” the Doctor said. “Still. We should probably pop back and see your mum, yeah?”

Cleis grinned.

“She’ll never believe any of this,” she said.

“You’d be surprised what people’ll believe,” Rose said.

“Like my mum believes I’ve never been time traveling and the Doctor’s just a weird friend who comes to tea too often,” Yaz added.

“She really still believes that?” Ryan asked.

“She pretends to,” Yaz said. “Now I’ve been home a few months it’s easier. Don’t know what’ll happen after we start traveling again. I’ll have to tell her eventually.” She shrugged. “Anyway. Greece?”

“Lesbos, Greece, Earth,” the Doctor agreed, racing to the console. “Oh, I’ve missed you,” she exclaimed in the general direction of the central column. Rose felt a warmth spread through her— she couldn’t tell if it was from the TARDIS’s response to the Doctor, telepathically projected, or her own affection. She followed the Doctor more slowly, smiling a little. She’d missed the TARDIS too, after all.

Moments later, they were on Lesbos. Rose had figured out her time senses well enough to know that it was roughly the same time they had been in before; the idea was confirmed when she looked at the TARDIS monitors.

“Day after we left,” she said. “Not bad.”

The Doctor patted the console fondly.

“She’s looking out for us,” she said.

Rose heard Cleis quietly asking Yaz, “Is the TARDIS a person?”

“No,” Yaz replied. “But it has a mind of its own.”

“Good way of putting it,” the Doctor said. “Now, shall we?”

Without waiting for an answer, she strode to the door and flung it open. Rose followed, Yaz and Cleis close on her heels, and Ryan and Graham trailing behind. As she stepped out of the TARDIS, Rose saw Sappho striding towards them, her expression the fierce anger Rose had once associated with her own mother, seeing the TARDIS after some time away. Before anyone had the chance to say even a single word, Sappho pulled her hand back and slapped the Doctor across the face.

“Where have you taken my daughter?” she demanded, still in the Doctor’s face. “With your strange box that’s not a ship?”

The Doctor’s mouth was open in shock. Rose had to suppress a laugh.

“You slapped me!” the Doctor exclaimed. “Came all the way back here and got slapped by Sappho!”

“Never mind that!” Sappho cried. “What did you do with my daughter?”

Cleis stepped out from behind Rose.

“I’m right here,” she said. “And I’m fine.”

Sappho instantly pulled Cleis into a hug with the same ferocity she had used to slap the Doctor.

The Doctor, of course, was still looking shocked, and now Rose couldn’t hold back her laughter any longer— she laughed, and the Doctor turned that shocked expression on her, now, which meant of course Rose laughed harder.

“She slapped you!” she exclaimed, out of breath. “Just like my mum!”

“Oi!” the Doctor said. “Don’t go bringing your mum into this! One angry mum is enough.”

She looked back at Sappho, who had separated from Cleis and was now glaring at the Doctor again.

“And I didn’t mean to take your daughter,” she said. “It was an accident, but look, she’s all back now.”

“She’s right,” Cleis admitted. “I ran into her box, and by the time she noticed me it was too late.”

Sappho seemed to relax at that.

“But I’m going to keep traveling with her,” Cleis added. “Mum, she can travel in time.” Rose expected Sappho’s anger to come back, or at least disbelief, but instead Sappho nodded.

“I suppose I knew you’d leave eventually,” she said. She looked at the Doctor. “Mind, you’d better keep my daughter safe.”

“I do my best,” the Doctor said.

Sappho paused. She glanced at the TARDIS.

“Does it really travel in time?” she asked.

“It really does,” Cleis said. “Mum, I’m going to see so much.”

“You could come, too, if you like,” the Doctor said. “For a trip or too.”

Sappho shook her head.

“I’ve never had an adventuring spirit,” she said. “Much prefer a quiet life. Stay for our evening meal, though?”

The Doctor refused the meal, which was behavior Rose associated with the version of the Doctor she had first traveled with, years and years ago. It didn’t seem so normal anymore, but no one raised comment— Cleis went, and Yaz and Graham and Ryan followed, and Rose decided to stay back with the Doctor.

“Don’t want you being all alone,” she said as the others left.

“I’m fine,” the Doctor said. “You can go if you want.” But she wasn’t making eye contact with Rose.

“No,” Rose said, “We’re going to go back into the TARDIS, and I’m going to make tea, and you’re going to tell me what’s wrong.”

“Nothing’s wrong!” the Doctor protested. “Just don’t want to do tea, is all.”

Rose rolled her eyes and pulled the Doctor through the TARDIS doors. She dragged the Doctor all the way to the kitchen, where she put the teakettle on and the Doctor stood in the doorway, looking entirely put out.

“Really, Rose, you should have gone with them,” she said.

“So you could sulk in peace?” Rose asked, eyebrows raised. “And don’t say you’re not domestic, because Yaz told me you have tea at hers every time you go back.”

“That’s different,” the Doctor protested.

“How’s it different?” Rose asked. “Yaz drags you?”

The Doctor opened her mouth, then closed it.

“No,” she said feebly. “I want to go.”

“And you don’t want to go now?” Rose asked. She was still standing in front of the stove, meters away from the Doctor.

“I do,” the Doctor said. “I just can’t.”

“Why not?”

The Doctor shrugged. Her face was tense, and Rose thought she could see tears in her eyes.

“Oh, Doctor,” she said, and she crossed the distance between them and pulled the Doctor into a tight hug. The Doctor hugged her back, clung to her, and Rose buried her face in the Doctor’s shoulder. “Is it because of Cleis?” she asked.

“I can’t get attached to families,” the Doctor said, her voice muffled by Rose’s shirt. “Yaz’s was an accident. I didn’t think I’d ever see her again. Was just going for tea because I didn’t want to say goodbye.”

The kettle whistled, and Rose let the Doctor go. There was a single tear track on her face, and Rose got the idea that it was all the Doctor could do to stop more tears from flowing.

Rose moved back towards the stove. She got down two mugs and two bags of chamomile tea— somehow, despite all the adventures she’d been on, all the exotic things she’d tried, the Doctor’s favorite had always been chamomile. Rose filled the mugs and brought them to the table, and the Doctor sat down with her.

“It’s okay to be attached,” Rose finally said. “Really.”

The Doctor shook her head.

“I get attached,” she said, “and then I just lose them. I can’t do that. Once I’ve been in their houses, eaten their food— I care about them, Rose. And caring hurts.” “That’s why you never came to tea at my flat?” Rose asked. “Trying to stay as distant as possible?”

The Doctor nodded.

“Didn’t work,” she added.

Rose laughed.

“Really didn’t,” she agreed.

“It’s just the difference between having friends and becoming part of a family, though,” the Doctor said. “I bring someone into my TARDIS, I’m going to care about them. But if I go into their house, their mums start poking at me, their siblings ask me invasive questions, and soon enough, I’m one of them. I love Yaz’s family, but they’ve gotten much too close. And I know I’ll lose them someday.”

“Nothing lasts forever,” Rose said, her voice quiet. “But why not enjoy it now?”

“It echoes,” the Doctor explained. “I know I’ll lose them, and I’m already sad about it. A big ache in my heart for something that hasn’t happened yet.”

Rose reached over and took one of the Doctor’s hands.

“We’ll be a family, then, yeah? I’ll live at least as long as you, now.”

“Doesn’t mean I won’t lose you,” the Doctor said, looking down at where their hands met.

Suddenly, Rose felt a sharp sort of protective instinct, almost. It was her love intensified, all mixed up with a need to make sure the Doctor was never hurt again.

“I promise,” she said. “I promise you won’t.”

“You can’t promise that,” the Doctor said.

“I can try,” Rose said. She squeezed the Doctor’s hand. “Anyway, if you don’t get involved in things ‘cause you’re scared, you’ll never do anything.”

“Suppose not,” the Doctor said. “I’ve been trying, you know. To love more freely.”

“You’re doing brilliantly,” Rose said. “I don’t think you would have said any of what you just told me when we first met.”

“I don’t think so either,” the Doctor admitted. “There’s one good thing, then. I’ve got better at emotions.”

Rose pulled her chair closer to the Doctor’s and rested her head on the Doctor’s shoulder.

“And thank goodness for that,” she said.

They sat like that until the TARDIS beeped, alerting them to the others returning. With a groan, Rose stood up, and the Doctor followed, still holding Rose’s hand. They walked back to the console room, where Ryan, Graham, Yaz, and Cleis were all waiting.

“How was tea?” the Doctor asked. “Sappho slap anybody else?”

“No slapping,” Graham said.

“Fortunately for me,” Yaz said. “As I think I would’ve been the target.”

Cleis was grinning, and she said, “You two should’ve come. Everyone was asking where you went, Rose.”

Rose shrugged.

“Maybe next time,” she said. “Right, Doctor?”

“Maybe,” the Doctor said. “Right, then. Cleis, you’ll need a room, yeah? I’ll get one generated for you.” She went to the console and poked at the buttons. “Brilliant,” she said. “Should be right across from Yaz.” She turned to look at the others. “Sorry, I’ve lost track. Is now a time for sleep? Do you need to sleep now?”

“It has been about twelve hours,” Graham said. “Certainly a time for winding down, if not sleep.”

“No more adventures today, then,” the Doctor said. “But we’ll think of somewhere brilliant to go tomorrow.”

“Anyone up for a movie night?” Ryan asked. “Still trying to show Cleis humanity’s greatest hits.”

“What’s on that list?” Rose asked.

“Greatest hits,” Ryan said. “Star Wars. Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Stuff like that. Next up was going to be Black Panther, but I’m open to discussion.”

“That’s not as bad as I thought,” Yaz said.

Ryan looked at her.

“Are you doubting my taste in movies?”

“I’m always doubting your taste,” Yaz said. “Remember that song you used to summon those spiders?”

“That was good,” Ryan insisted.

“Whatever,” Yaz said. “I’m in for a movie night if that’s what’s playing.”

“I said I was open to discussion,” Ryan muttered.

“I said I liked your choice!” Yaz protested.

“Now, now,” Graham said. “No fighting.”

“Well, I like your taste in music,” Cleis said.

“See?” Ryan asked. “Your girlfriend likes my music.”

“Well, that’d just be her one flaw, then,” Yaz said.

They made their way to the game room, where the TARDIS kept her television, bantering the whole way. It took almost ten minutes for everyone to sit down— Ryan kept sprawling his whole body across the couch until finally Yaz gave up and just sat directly on him. Rose, who had immediately claimed an armchair, looked on in amusement until the Doctor decided to sit directly on her, and when the ensuing tussle had finished, they were wedged next to each other, one of Rose’s thighs overlapping with one of the Doctor’s, the Doctor’s arms around her waist.

Rose looked up. Everyone was looking at them. Somehow, they had all managed to settle on the sofa and other armchair— Graham had the chair, and Cleis and Ryan had the sofa with Yaz laid out across them, her head in Cleis’s lap, her feet in Ryan’s.

“You know I have to get up to start the movie,” Ryan told Yaz.

Just then, the TV sparked to life, and an opening shot splashed across the screen.

“Thanks, TARDIS,” Yaz said.

“Never seen this one before,” Rose remarked. “Missed a lot in the parallel universe.”

“It’s brilliant,” Ryan promised.

It was brilliant— the movie, and also the experience of watching it with the Doctor, pressed against her; Ryan, pointing out interesting background imagery and reciting trivia; Yaz, refusing to move for anyone; Cleis, laughing at Yaz; and Graham, rolling his eyes at it all.

“This is just like New Lesotho,” the Doctor said halfway through. “’Course, took them a bit longer for some of the tech, given vibranium isn’t exactly real. Got lots of other interesting metals, though.”

“Quiet down,” Ryan said, as if he hadn’t been talking through the whole movie.

“I’m just saying,” the Doctor persisted. “It’s a brilliant planet. At the height of technological advancement in its day, too.”

“Guess we’ve found someplace to go tomorrow, then,” Rose said, and kissed the Doctor on the cheek. A silly grin immediately sprung to the Doctor’s face, and Rose couldn’t help but smile back before resting her head back on the Doctor’s shoulder. Rose had been skeptical when Ryan had said it was a superhero movie, but she actually enjoyed it— there wasn’t much gratuitous violence, and the plot held up. When it ended, there was some lazy conversation about the movie, but one by one, everyone excused themselves to bed until it was just Rose and the Doctor, curled up in that armchair, one of the Doctor’s hands running through Rose’s hair, Rose’s fingers dancing along the back of the Doctor’s hand.

“Been a while,” the Doctor said, after minutes of silence.

“What do you mean?” Rose asked.

“Since I’ve had a family,” the Doctor said.

“So you’ll admit it,” Rose said. “You got attached.”

“Suppose I’d better stop pretending,” the Doctor said.

“Knew you could do it,” Rose said. She felt a cozy sort of warm, not tired, really, but comfortable, content— it had been a while since she had had any sort of family, too. She had forgotten what it was like.

The Doctor moved the hand that was in Rose’s hair down to pull her close by the waist; Rose turned herself towards the Doctor, leaning up for a kiss.

“It’s not so bad,” the Doctor said. “Being attached.”

“Not so bad,” Rose repeated, a smile curling across her face.

They didn’t move from those spots— eventually, Rose did fall asleep, nodding off against the Doctor’s neck, and she woke up hours later to the Doctor humming softly against her hair.

“What’s that?” she murmured, still half-asleep.

“It’s silly,” the Doctor said, her voice soft to match Rose’s.

“Not silly,” Rose said. “Pretty.”

“It’s an old song,” the Doctor said. “From Gallifrey. A lullaby.”

“Not silly at all,” Rose said.

“I don’t usually sing in front of people,” the Doctor said. “Feels weird.”

“Just means you need practice,” Rose said. “You can sing to me forever, as far as I’m concerned.”

“Really?” the Doctor asked.

“’Course,” Rose said. “It’s nice.” She hesitated. “The you in the other universe— human you— he used to sing,” she said. “He’d forgotten most of the Gallifreyan songs, though. Said they weren’t meant for a human mind.”

“Never thought of that,” the Doctor said. “He’s right, though, Gallifreyans always need to complicate things. Some of their music involves literally plucking at time.”

Rose shivered.

“Sounds dangerous,” she said.

“Not really,” the Doctor said. “You don’t pluck enough to do any damage. Still. Not exactly something a human can handle.”

They talked about music and Gallifrey and the other universe and families and home for hours, until the TARDIS beeped to tell them the others were up. Hand in hand, they walked to the console room, where Yaz and Cleis were waiting.

“Ready for another adventure?” the Doctor asked.

Rose didn’t have to look at Yaz and Cleis to know the answer was yes.

[queenzufufu]

Youngsters (7/?)

Summary: For the kids at The Rooster teeth care home, life hasn’t always been easy. They’ve come from broken homes, broken families. They’ve escaped with broken bones and broken spirits. But at least now they have a second chance to be happy with a real family.

Well…that’s easier said than done when your family includes a hyperactive midget, an over eager wrestling fanatic and a boy who just can’t go a day without punching something…or someone.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 AO3

“Maybe you should try locking him in a cage or, like, a pet crate or something.” - Ryan

“Yes, Burnie, I promise I’ll be home by twelve.”

Geoff was leaning against the door to the head carer’s office, pleading his case while Burnie sat in his swivel chair, the steam from his coffee fogging his glasses. Downstairs he could hear the voices from Barbara and Matt, who were desperately trying to coax Jeremy into his room to go to bed. Getting that youngster into his room at this hour? Geoff didn’t envy them one bit.

“Alright,” Burnie agreed. Geoff had been hoping to go to a house party the coming Friday, hoping to maybe find true love again with a certain lady he knew was also attending, seeing how Tina had swiftly dumped him and proceeded to tell every girl at school what a jackass he was, whether they wanted to hear it or not. “But if you’re a second later your curfew will be an hour earlier for a month, you understand? I don’t care if you’re ‘nearly a man’ as you’re always telling me, while you still live with me, you live by my rules.”

“Don’t worry, Burnie. When have I ever broken a promise?”

Saying it out loud almost made him believe it. He’d broken more than his fair share of promises, to Burnie probably more than anyone, when he’d been the uncontrollable little kid that had first arrived at Rooster Teeth. It was because of those many early misdeeds that Geoff felt even more indebted to keep his word to the man who’d raised him from being a wild little brat into someone half decent.

And it wasn’t like Burnie was overly strict - quite the opposite in fact. Compared to the rules of many state homes, Burnie ran the place with a firm but flexible hand, putting trust in kids who might have been kept locked away in other homes - runaways, anger issues, panic attacks; those thought to be best kept away from society.

With a gratifying grin and salute, Geoff left the man to his business and bounded back downstairs, skidding to a half as Matt and Barbara practically manhandled a very grumpy Jeremy up to his room, barely holding in his laughter as Matt caught his eye and pulled a face that could only read “kill me now”.

He grabbed a soda from the kitchen and made his way into the smaller living room. The lights were dimmed and the fire was alight - it wasn’t even that cold indoors but if Ryan was around, he was sure as hell going to light one. Shelves littered with books and various art projects spanning over ten years were bathed in a warm orange glow. It was Ryan and Jack who were the only ones there, taking up the two large couches, lying spread-eagled across the cushions, both quietly watching some re-run of an old wildlife documentary.

Geoff placed his drink on the side table and sat himself down next to Jack - or rather glared at the younger teen until he made enough space and sat upright to allow Geoff to sit. As he moved, Geoff noticed the slight stiffness in the action and the way he rubbed at a red mark on his elbow, instantly recalling the reasoning behind it.

Jack had been in a fight earlier, almost as soon as they arrived home from school. There was no prize for guessing who with.

Ever since his chat with the boy, it was like Lawrence had become suddenly more interested - possessive even - over spending time with Geoff. On one hand, Geoff was glad the kid was socializing more. On the other, it seemed to have made any interactions with the other kids even more violent. Like with Jack - he had thrown a fit when the thirteen-year-old had interrupted the two talking about new movies coming out to ask Geoff a question about homework, furious that another kid was taking Geoff’s attention away from him, though he still liked to act as if he resented any conversation the eldest struck up with him - and he came at Jack yelling.

Jack, smiling and pacifying as ever, tried to talk to him. Impossible with Lawrence, so Jack tried to ignore him.

Then Lawrence hit some sensitive spot with his words, or his small fists, and Geoff saw Jack’s mood change. It wasn’t exactly anger. Anger was not something that came easy to Jack, but it was something more like frustration and acceptance.

He’d sighed and given Geoff a resigned look before flying at Lawrence.

They fought.

Geoff made no attempt to stop it. He had stood back and made sure they didn’t cause any serious injuries, but from the start it was apparent that, though they didn’t pull any punches, they were hardly hurting each other as badly as they could have.

They ended up scratched, bleeding, tired, rolling around on the grass unwilling to surrender.

Lawrence came out on top because Jack had no real anger in him and had been warier considering he was far the taller of the two, if not the better fighter. Even the frustration Geoff had seen light up in him had been temporary. A flare to Lawrence’s slow-burning raging candle.

But Lawrence didn’t beat him with any childish smugness. There was no victory in him when he rolled to his feet and held out a hand to Jack.

The two of them recognized something in each other at that moment; that was clear. But just what hadn’t been apparent at the time.

After it was all over Lawrence had skulked off, leaving the home and not returning by late that evening - unescorted by police… which had been a twice occurrence so far, when he’d been causing disruption in town. But apparently, half an hour before Geoff had come back, he brought himself back of his own accord, no shouting or swearing, quietly alerting the staff to his presence before heading to his room. Silent, unflappable, not acting out in any way.

And Jack - Jack who never fought with anyone in that manner, who was all about having a good time and making people happy, who was basically a cuddly teddy bear at all times… the experience strangely seemed to have kind of positive effect.

That look. His look of resignation and acceptance before flying at Lawrence.

It had caught Geoff off-guard. He understands, I think.

That was the line that had stuck in Geoff’s head. After the scuffle was over, and Lawrence had taken himself away, Jack went and sat on the terrace, leaning arms over thighs as he caught his breath back. Geoff had joined him, albeit slowly, unsure if his company was wanted after that. Conflicted too, not knowing whether it was a situation that needed telling to Burnie. Normally it would be a no-brainer. Fights or violence between the kids of any sort were to be reported immediately so the carers were aware and could monitor the situation. But there had been something about that fight, and the completely non-violent conclusion to it, that put Geoff in his dilemma. It was almost too personal.

What happened back there? Was the question Geoff didn’t need to voice for Jack to answer.

And there it was. “He understands, I think. I don’t know how but I think we both just…know.” Jack had laughed, realizing how vague he sounded but making no effort to explain further. The minor scratches on his arms had stopped bleeding, yet he still rubbed absentmindedly at them, finding a meaning only visible to him.

Geoff had twisted to look at him questioningly. He felt more out of the loop than he normally did. “I don’t think I know what you’re talking about.”

“And hopefully you never will,” Jack said, running a hand through disheveled hair. “Or at least not in those circumstances. Not like that…”

Geoff had exhaled shortly out his nose, head shaking in bewilderment. “You worry so much about stepping on our toes but you’re just the same. We all have our secrets. We all have our limits, our boundaries,” he pointed out. “You’re one of us, whether you like it or not, nothing’s gonna change that.” From the look on Jack’s face, he hadn’t seemed completely sold on the idea, and Geoff had shoulder nudged him. “Just something to think about,” he said as he left Jack to his thoughts and battle wounds.

He hadn’t seen the younger boy since then. He’d been around a friend’s for dinner, the same friend who’d invited him to his house party, and had only recently arrived back.

Noticing his stares, Jack shifted in his seat, consciously moving his hand away from his injuries. “Should’a seen the other guy,” he said.

“I did. He looked better than you.”

Jack smiled. There was that strange expression on his face again, understanding, one of remembrance. Geoff wondered, suddenly, if he’d made the right call for keeping the fight from the carers. He supposed he could tell them at a later date if things took a turn for the worse, but then he’d feel like it was his fault for not saying something sooner and plus, there might have been other little eyes spying on them, and if they went to Burnie or one of the other carers first, that might cause them to lose the hell of a lot of trust they already put into Geoff.

Jack cleared his throat then, swinging his legs up so he could curl further into the couch corner. “Yeah… well, I went easy on him. Can’t be seen to be bullying little kids now, can I?”

Geoff glanced at him, torn between playing along with the banter and wanting to push further for an explanation. “There was only one bully back there…” he started to tease, cutting off as the words caught in his throat. “Jack –” he stared, only to practically jump out of his skin at the little voice suddenly at his side.

“What do they mean when a woman’s size zero?”

Jeremy! But wait… hadn’t Geoff seen him…

“He snuck in about twenty seconds ago,” Ryan mentioned from the other couch, nodding towards the ajar door. “About twenty seconds after Matt and Barbara came downstairs to go home.”

Geoff looked at Jeremy, the five-year-old who was currently clambering up onto the arm of the couch, clad in Spiderman pajamas and most definitely not asleep in bed. He came accompanied by his two favorite teddies. Rimmy - an orange-furred bear that had seen better days, and Tim - a little purple owl with massive eyes, that Trevor had bought for him when they went to the zoo. Its pupils had been scratched off over time, giving it a blank, haunted stare.

Geoff shook his head in amusement. Ah well, someone will find him soon enough.

Jeremy frowned, poking him in the arm a few times. “What do they mean when a woman’s size zero?” he asked again.

Size zero… What? Geoff looked at the TV to see if Jeremy had gained that question from what was on screen but the only thing happening was penguin chicks sliding about trying to get into the ocean water. And none of those fluffy motherfuckers are worried about their dress size.

As Jeremy climbed over the arm and onto Geoff’s lap, Jack opened his mouth to answer only to be cut off immediately by the boy continuing: “Because zero’s nothing! So… then they’d be invisible,” he said with great conviction.

Ryan smirked, peering at the two as Jeremy settled himself further into Geoff’s lap. “It just means she’s very skinny,” he said, quickly adding: “But a woman can be any size or shape she wants.”

Jeremy stared at him for a long moment. “What about a star shape?”

There were multiple noises of amusement coming from all three teens at that statement but Jeremy was unfazed by it all, tilting his head further in curiosity. Ryan, meanwhile, tried to rectify his statement: “No, no, I mean she could be –”

He didn’t get very far.

“Or a heart shape cause girls like hearts –” Jeremy suggested, raising his hands in the air to demonstrate.

Geoff batted them gently away. “No, we meant it doesn’t matter if a woman is thin or fat,” he explained.

Jeremy hesitated. He looked at Geoff, brown eyes extremely quizzical. “What if you were like this?” he asked, blowing out his cheeks and puffing out his chest, wobbling side to side. “Would that be okay?”

There was a stunned moment of awkward silence for the little boy’s “fat” impression. “Well um - uh…” Ryan stammered.

Jeremy cut him off again, stating matter of factly, “There’s a man in Mes-Mexico and um, he has to get a crane to get him out of bed he’s so fat; is that alright?” he asked, tilting his head to the side.

“Oh um…well, no…”

Jeremy narrowed his eyes, regarding each one of the teens with his firmest stare. “What is too fat?” he spoke slowly. “Is it –”

“Would you like to watch TV?” Geoff’s voice cracked in his haste to shut the boy up.

The little boy looked up at him and huffed shortly. “No.”

Well… he couldn’t get a more straightforward answer than that.

The next twenty minutes or so were spent diverting Jeremy’s attention from the topic, all three teens working together to keep him interested in the TV show rather than whatever random questions he had stored up in his head.

Eventually, their efforts paid off, with the help of a great white shark or two, who Jeremy had said “were awesome” before finally settling down and watching the show in silence. It didn’t take long for him to fall fast asleep, right there in Geoff’s lap, head crooked in the eldest’s arm, heavily breathing.

And it didn’t take long after that for him to be discovered by one of the carers. As per usual, Trevor, who joined Burnie and Gus as night staff during the weekdays, went up to check on Jeremy’s room to make sure he was asleep - as he so often wasn’t - and obviously finding no boy there, hurried back downstairs, checking in first the larger living room and then in theirs, shaking his head in both relief and exasperation at the sight.

“That little…” he muttered under his breath, stepping around to gather the youngster into his arms. “I’m sorry boys.”

Geoff grinned at the young man. “No worries, least he’s out now.” And he would stay out. Once he was gone, he was gone, thank the Lord.

Trevor arranged Jeremy into one arm, grabbing Rimmy and Tim with the other, pausing as he turned to look at the TV, pulling a face at the blood-filled water and fish bits. “Hmm, nice. Hopefully that doesn’t come back to haunt us.”

“Oh yeah, sorry,” Geoff apologized, sheepish. He remembered a year or so ago when Jeremy had caught a glimpse of Jaws. The staff had been dealing with wet bedsheets for a good week after that. “Was the only thing that kept him interested.”

“Maybe you should try locking him in a cage or, like, a pet crate or something,” Ryan added, rolling his eyes at Trevor’s disapproving look. “I’m not serious,” he said, before turning his head sharply to Geoff. “Or am I?” he whispered harshly, putting on a menacing tone, though his eyes shone gleefully, like a child, and Geoff could only smile in return.

Trevor shook his head, giving Ryan’s head a light shove as he walked past with his sleeping passenger, at the same time as the credits rolled on the documentary, an old war movie starting up next. It didn’t take long for Ryan to lose interest; he usually liked to spend the remainder of his evenings in his room playing video games anyway.

“I’m gonna go up,” he said, stretching languidly as he stood. “See you boys tomorrow.”

“Night, Ryan,” they both murmured as the door shut behind him.

The fire was dying down by now, yet it was still toasty warm in the room, enough to entice Jack and Geoff to linger for a while more. Geoff half paid attention to the movie and half counted the number of times Jack looked across at him. The teen kept shooting glances his way, and Geoff knew he wanted to ask something. He waited, tapping his fingers on his knee until Jack finally swallowed.

“He lost a family member, didn’t he?”

“Who?” Geoff asked, surprised, thinking that Jack was referring to Ryan at first, which made no sense because he already knew the answer to that one and that was hardly a comfortable topic of conversation.

But Jack shook his head. “Lawrence,” he added, locking eyes with Geoff. There was something odd in his face, and Geoff stared intently at him. “Who was it? Mom? Dad?” Jack continued.

God. He hadn’t been expecting this, and he once again felt torn, knowing he really wasn’t supposed to give any private information away but, if this was connected to earlier, which he was ninety-nine percent sure it was - wasn’t getting to the bottom of that strange fight more important?

He debated with himself for a few moments before making up his mind. “Dad. Heart attack,” he rushed out. “He tell you that?” he asked, perhaps a bit more accusing than he intended, because he saw something guilty in how Jack’s eyes flickered away and shoulders hunched.

“He didn’t need to,” Jack replied, face decisive. “He saw his dad die.” He didn’t say it with sadness or sympathy, more like the same realization and acceptance that Geoff had seen in his face earlier.

Saw him die? Geoff hadn’t said that. Hell, he didn’t know the specifics.

For a moment Geoff wanted to shake him. To grab him by the shoulders and let himself demand better answers so he could feel more involved. But it wasn’t his place to pry into the private feelings of the other kids - not unless it was doing them harm and, as far as Geoff could see, despite the fighting, what had occurred earlier had been reasonably harmless. It’s just he’s so fucking curious. Sure, Lawrence. But Jack? Jack resigning his good nature to fight with another kid? Just a whole lot of God damn curiosity.

“You think you’re better than me but neither of us saved them,” Jack suddenly said.  He smiled as Geoff’s eyes widened. “That’s what he said,” he clarified. “That’s what made me… feel like I had to go at him - not in anger,” he hastily added. “Just something we needed to sort out. I think he wanted it… was pushing me to see if what he’s probably heard around here was true.”

Geoff stared at him for longer than was natural, taken aback by the way Jack had abruptly revealed what Geoff had been wondering all along. “Heart attack if I recall. When the kid was seven.” What the hell, he might as well tell Jack the rest of that limited story. The kid was hardly going to go blagging about it to the others. He felt a tinge of guilt, that he might have been violating Lawrence’s privacy, but the kid had kind of partially given that away, now that he knew what the boy had said to Jack to start things off.

“Jeez, that’s really tough,” Jack said, and usually the pity would be just that, pity. But it was Jack, and he’d been through it, he’d been through the worst loss imaginable.

“Mmm,” Geoff grunted and took a deep breath. “I don’t think that’s what’s making him so angry here though.”

Jack stirred as if waking from a dream, shrugging slightly. “Can’t have helped though, could it?”

“No…no, it can’t have,” Geoff agreed.

“What you said earlier… about me worrying.” Jack gulped, tongue like he suddenly wanted air, wanted to get out, to change the subject, but pushing through anyway. “… Do you ever resent me for it?” he asked in a small voice. “For having a family who, y’know… who loved me?”

Geoff stared at him. “Fuck no,” he said, shocked and frowning. “Why would you even ask that?” It came out harsher than intended and Jack cowered in on himself.

“You’re right. I’m sorry,” he whispered, jaw clenching.

Geoff gave him a considering look. Then he reached out an arm - Jack jerking back automatically in surprise, calming down when he saw the softness in Geoff’s eyes. “Hey, no, I’m sorry,” Geoff apologized instead. “I was just a bit shocked by the question. Do I ever come off that way?”

“No, but… I don’t exactly make things easy for myself.”

“What do you mean?” Geoff knew Jack worried about tiptoeing around certain subjects, more than Geoff would have liked, but he’d thought that was just how the younger teen was. A people pleaser through and through.

“Just by, like,” Jack murmured, biting his lip, "opening my big mouth and hurting people when I don’t mean to. I never mean to.”

Geoff sighed. “I still have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Jack’s jaw clenched again, lips pursing like he tasted something sour.

“You think you’re hurting us? Jack…” He reached out again, this time able to put a comforting hand on the younger boy’s shoulder, and he spoke in earnest. “None of that’s to do with you. Sometimes things happen and people - everybody, not just you - say and do stuff that has an effect on us. Takes us back for the briefest of moments. But that ain’t your fault. No…” His own fists clenched slightly in conviction. “No, that ain’t your fault at all. That is, for me, my good-for-nothing parents fault. Same goes for a lot of us.”

Jack swallowed. He didn’t answer, and when Geoff looked over at him, his head was lowered and his hands twisted into the fabric of his t-shirt. So tense he was nearly shaking. But Geoff couldn’t stop now, couldn’t stop when Jack still looked completely and utterly unconvinced about his own self-worth.

He reached his arm further around the boy’s shoulders, a position he had taken so many times when his younger brothers were upset. Each of those times he could only speak from his heart, that was the best he could do, he never saw himself as some great motivator or emphasizer. I’m not a psychologist, but I am their big brother. And I care.

He breathed deeply, leaning his head in close. “Just because you’re not here because your parents were assholes doesn’t mean we resent you or despise you for it, or whatever other crap you’ve conjured up in that big head of yours. In a way, it’s way harder for you, because you had a great life before, and it must’ve hurt so much more to have it taken away.” He scoffed a bit. “And be honest, there must have been loads of times when one of us has done the same to you, unintentionally made you feel bad or sad about the past.”

“I dunno… yeah, I guess.” Jack was side-eyeing him like it was some kind of trap.

“Tell me.” Geoff urged.

“What?”

“Tell me. I want to know what I’ve done to make you feel like that. Drop it on me.”

“It’s nothing you’ve done personally,” Jack muttered, and Geoff had to selfishly admit that made him feel better about himself. “I uh –” Jack huffed in frustration. “It’s dumb.”

“I think it’s dumb some harmless comment someone makes can cause me to feel all freaked out for a few seconds,” Geoff pointed out. “Just cause you may think something’s dumb, doesn’t make it hurt any less.”

Jack was quiet for a moment, picking at a loose thread on the hem of his shirt. “When… when you guys… the youngin’s, I mean,” he spoke, soft and tentative. “Y’know, they can get rowdy on longer car journeys and… not all the time, but sometimes I feel…” His face twitched. “All nervous and out of control and I can’t help thinking back –” He broke off and attempted to laugh it off, the sound coming out very forced, his cheeks reddening. “See?” he looked up at Geoff. “Dumb.”

Geoff shook his head, a small smile on his lips. “Jack Pattillo. You went through a horrific trauma at seven years old that most folks don’t experience in a lifetime. You lost your mom, your dad, your little sister; all in a blink of an eye. You were thrown into a world with kids you thought would resent you for coming from a good family. And yet here we are, everybody here loves you. You’re kind and friendly, easy for everyone to talk to and, I might add, you give the best fucking hugs ever.” He added on to that part by tightening his arm around the younger boy’s shoulders, adding: “Hey, you even achieved something I haven’t yet - you somehow connected on a deeper level to the angriest kid currently here. That’s you. That’s all you, kid.”

Jack was silent, stunned. Geoff couldn’t blame him. They loved each other and all, brothers to the end, but like brothers, sometimes talking about the hard shit didn’t come as easy. Eventually, Jack did nod, slowly. He slumped back against the couch, and Geoff rather awkwardly sat there, all his energy having gone into his passionate speech, and now he was all aware of what he’d just said and how full on it might have sounded. He part expected Jack to leave - but he just sort of lounged there, seemingly comfortable to be there, next to Geoff, in a companionable silence. After a few moments, Jack relaxed enough to release some of the tension from his body. As he did though, he drew in a sharp intake of breath.

Unable to meet Geoff’s gaze, he shakily breathed out. “I miss them so much sometimes.” Geoff leaned around to see tears glistening behind the boy’s glasses. Now that he’d released all the tension, it seemed like it had been the only thing to keep him from breaking down, and Geoff instinctively wrapped the boy in a proper hug as he shook and cried out quiet sobs of pure pain.

“I know,” Geoff said into his ear, blinking repeatedly. “I miss them for you, cause they must’a been freakin’ awesome guys to raise a kid like you.”

To the outside eye, the emotional outburst may have appeared out of nowhere, but Geoff had noticed over the past few weeks, troubled thoughts building up in the younger teen.  It could have and probably had been just a load of small things, all building up to this moment. Maybe the fight with Lawrence today had been the breaker. Either way, at some point, Geoff knew all that emotion was going to be released one way or another. That it could grow and grow and spill out, catching you unaware at the most inopportune moments.

Nights too. Nights were always somehow the hardest. They were often the quietest part of the day. More time for reflection, easy to get caught up in your own head once the day was over and only sleep and dreams awaited.

He’d been there too, he recalled, not letting go or loosening his grip and Jack still cried quietly into his shoulder. Oh yeah, he’d been there many-a-time. In the end, there wasn’t much you could do about it.

Yep, some nights just freakin’ sucked.

––––

So he’d been getting on well with school. And swimming. He’d made friends in both places, and his week had been… good. Good as in not excellent, not awful, just very neutral. Perhaps ‘okay’ was a more apt choice of word. He’d had an okay week.

Geoff approached him one day after school, took him by the hand and lead him down to the basement without even asking. Gavin put on the smallest pair of gloves while Geoff grabbed the bad and held it ready, and they started to practice the simple exercise they’d gone through many-a-time, all without saying one word to each other, the only sound coming from Gavin grunting every so often due to the pure physical exertion.

They were silent until it was over fifteen minutes and Geoff had gone to get a snack and a drink for them both, orange juice and some Tim Tams Barbara had brought back from her travels, and somehow they ended up talking about nothing in particular, at one point just bouncing back and forth dumb ideas for presents for Ryan’s upcoming birthday - Geoff seemed weirdly keen on the idea of buying Ryan a full set of bedroom furnishings, duvet and pillow cases, cushions, blankets, but with a twist; they would all have massive prints of Ryan’s own face on them. Perfect for an egomaniac like him, Geoff had joked. They got so caught up in the conversation that they forgot what time it was and had to be called up for dinner. It had been nice, Gavin couldn’t remember the last time he’d let his mind wander so freely and so carefree.

Geoff made time for him most days now. Not that he hadn’t before, but it was like he’d reserved a specific time for only hanging out with Gavin. And again, their chatter was always nothing of importance. They would talk about food, movies, celebrities; a right pair of gossip girls. Geoff would tell him about the new girl he was interested in. Griffon was her name and she sounded cool, Geoff’s eyes always lit up that extra bit when he spoke of her, unlike the way they’d dimmed with some of his previous romances. Only negative: she’d already rejected Geoff’s advances twice but, Geoff would adamantly tell him, it was all part of the game.

Gavin thought the game sounded rather complicated.

He wished those conversations could go on forever. No matter how hard Michael or Jeremy tried, their attempts at trying to keep his mind distracted never seemed to work quite as well. Sure, he would enjoy their company as much as he ever did but it was always so obvious to him, that they were worried. And that just made him feel plain bad. He didn’t want to be a burden on them. Not that he was naive enough to think that Geoff’s planned get-togethers didn’t have the same kind of intentions, but with the eldest… well, he wasn’t sure. Perhaps it was because Geoff gave off the air of having been there, done that, lived to tell the tale. His manner was always relaxing and comforting to Gavin, like he was reassuring him that there was nothing wrong with him even without saying it directly.

Because Gavin did worry, a lot, that there was something wrong with him. Something that couldn’t be fixed. It would make sense. His parents had treated him like he was their toy, for them to do with as they pleased. They had been sick people, mentally disturbed, the both of them. Two disturbed people who had unfortunately found each other and brought him up in their life of “scientific research”. The only thing they ever did right by him, was leaving him alone in that hotel room for three days and not coming back, even after the fire and everyone had been evacuated, alerting the authorities to that fact that there was one small, young boy all by himself.

He thinks, when it all came down to it, that maybe the unknowingness of it all was what affected him the most. He didn’t have closure. His parents weren’t in prison or rehab or dead - or maybe they were but he had no way of knowing. They were simply an overhanging memory and the fact that they could still be out there and might one day reappear in his life… that was what terrified him more than anything.

The nights were still the worst. When he’s lying in bed, staring up at the ceiling, waiting for sleep to take him so he could just get it all over and done with but dreading it all the same.

“Gavvy? You okay?” Michael asked from his bed.

Gavin shifted a bit, pulling the duvet up higher. “Mmhmm.” It was half nine. They had school tomorrow. They weren’t supposed to still be talking.

“Should I switch the light off yet?”

Michael was the only one who had a bedside table to hold a lamp. Gavin used to have one, but more violent night terrors lead to that being taken away, less the carers wanted him to keep hitting his head on it.

“Not yet, if that’s okay,” Gavin managed. It was embarrassing, and he swallowed hard, and how could he say he wanted it to stay on all night when Michael couldn’t get to sleep if there was light in the room? That would just be purely selfish and Michael already did so much for him.

“Course, it’s okay,” Michael said cheerfully, but Gavin could tell from the lilt in his voice that he was getting sleepy.

Five more minutes, he told himself. Five more minutes and then I’ll be brave.

There was some more rustling from Michael’s side of the room, the bed creaking as the other boy moved about on it. “So… I found this earlier,” Michael said, and there was something slow and careful in it.

Gavin’s eyes widened in horror as Michael held up some of the books Jeremy had given him the other week, ones he had kept hidden under his bed. He didn’t have time to ask why Michael had been rummaging through his stuff though. “They - they’re not mine,” he lied, and Michael nodded slowly, and now Gavin couldn’t stop worrying if he was going to make fun of him, and he sunk further into his bed, hoping it might swallow him up.

“I know. They’re Jeremy’s,” Michael replied casually. “Was wondering why you had them, was all.”

Gavin kept quiet. Michael thought bedtime stories were dumb and Gavin, having never known any better, had always tended to agree with him. Michael always said he could imagine way cooler stories in his head without the need for a book. That may be so but for Gavin… all his stories were nothing ever meant for children.

“It was just Jeremy trying to help,” he mumbled. “He was only trying to help.”

Michael didn’t broach the subject again, and part of Gavin was glad, but part of him wished he would. Part of him wanted Michael to laugh fondly at little Jeremy’s ideas, giving Gavin the opportunity to laugh too, so Gavin could show that he thought kids storybooks were dumb also. It could be their little joke rather than Gavin’s awkward secret.

Michael didn’t laugh.

Instead, Gavin heard him get out of bed and, as he rolled to question where the boy was going, Michael smiled at him by the door, rubbing at tired eyes. “I’ll be back in a few secs. Don’t worry,” he assured.

As the footsteps padded away, Gavin’s curiosity increased. Normally he would be able to hear where Michael had gone judging by the location of his steps but as it was night, the boy was being extra quiet. After a couple of minutes, when Gavin had just started to fret that Michael had left him - even though he knew that was completely ridiculous - the sound of footsteps appeared again. Two sets this time.

Hall-light shone into the room as the door opened again and Michael entered, Trevor a few steps behind. The young carer’s hair was poking out in all directions and he was dressed in a hoodie and sweatpants. Clearly, Michael had caught him in the middle of his own bedtime routine. Nevertheless, Trevor spoke friendly and upbeat as ever. “Hey Gav, Michael said there’s some books he wants me to read. That okay?”

Gavin only stared, mouth agape, as Michael bounded to the pile of books and picked the one Jeremy had recommended. The one with a dog on the front. “This one Trevor! This one looks the best!” he grinned, dancing around on bare feet.

“Alright, alright, settle down,” Trevor hushed. “It’s quiet time, remember?”

“Okay,” Michael whispered, putting his finger to his lips. “We’ll be very, very quiet.”  And then instead of getting back into his own bed, he dashed towards Gavin’s, jumping in under the covers before either Gavin or Trevor could get in a word. “What?” he said innocently, as he poked his unruly curly head out. “This is for a better audio experience.”

Trevor rolled his eyes but allowed Michael to stay. The other boy felt incredibly warm next to Gavin and he smelled like the strawberry shower gel he’d used earlier. It wasn’t the first time they’d shared a bed, but usually, it was because they were cold and playing a video game together. As the lay together at that moment Gavin wondered if, in Michael’s past life, that maybe once upon a time, he’d done the same with his brothers, before they’d all been taken away and separated.

Trevor pulled over a chair and sat down next to them. He read - he read a book to them. Harry The Dirty Dog was no ground breaking literature and was quite short, probably aimed at children a few years younger than them aka Jeremy, but it was charming all the same and Trevor was excellent at putting on the voices.

After that, Trevor read one called Green Eggs and Ham which Michael, to Gavin’s surprise, seemed to greatly enjoy. The older boy even demanded that Trevor read another Dr. Seuss book after - their last one, Trevor informed them.

Turned out Trevor was correct in his estimations of their energy levels. Before the book was finished, Gavin’s eyes were shut and he was barely paying attention to the words, not stirring when Trevor stopped altogether and stood up. He was vaguely aware of Trevor ushering an almost passed out Michael back to his own bed, but darkness quickly consumed him, locking out any info of the waking world.

And what a darkness. For it was simply that. For once in so many weeks, it was simply dark. Simple, peaceful nothingness.