#they’re just so deliciously ANGSTY | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

madamechrissy · 5 months ago

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Dirty Little Secret

ꕥ Pairings: Toji Fushiguro x Fem Reader

ꕥ Warnings-MDNI-explicit sexual content, dirty talk, Toji calls reader 'doll, ma, slut (Toji and Doll just work lol) Age gap- reader is 21, Toji is 39. - This chapter- Rough sex, slapping, dollification, objectification, choking, biting, angry sex, cunnilingus, overstimulation. It's TOJI so yeah lol

ꕥ Word Count- 7,560

ꕥ Summary- Toji Fushiguro is your dad Shiu's best friend for years. You've known him most your life. You come home for spring break to relax, and who pops up at the fucking doorstep? Toji. He's nasty, annoying, perverted and... Sexy. Hot. Built. And makes you think, maybe your first time shouldn't be with some college boy? But with this buff dude who can tie a cherry stem with his tongue and a scar on his damn lip. You just gotta hope your dad doesn't find out.

AN- Somehow my silly smut is turning deep and maybe gonna be angsty lol!? But mostly smut- Lmk if you wanna be tagged in any updates!

Chapter 4 - Masterlist - Playlist

Chapter 5

The next morning, you wake up to the sound of your dad and Toji’s laughter, mixing with music, and you bury your face into your pillow, moaning into it. The sunlight is streaming far too brightly through your window, and you’re aching in places you’ve never even felt. Your pussy throbs, an odd ache to it, making you shift your thighs just a bit to see if it will ease.

It only gets worse, you’re so sore you realize, as you sit up and stretch your arms, standing up to look in the mirror. Your hair is a fucking mess, you slept in some mascara that’s faded down your eyes to make you look racoon like, but your cheeks? They’re bright red. Your eyes? You’ve never seen them like this, glittering, so pretty almost.

You did look different.

You always wondered, was that true? It’s feeling a weird mix of emotions. It’s like a secret thrill has nestled into your chest, you can still feel Toji’s weight on your body, and the scent of his cologne and even his sweat lingers in the air of your little room. You see the marks from him on your breasts, see the faint red line on your neck. You gingerly touch it, flushing.

The memory was so vivid your inner walls clench in desire, and a delicious ache echoes through your body, pulsing through your veins like fire. You bite your lower lip, peeking down your body, and you’re drenched against your panties, and you know that’s all you because Toji had not cum in you.

Yet.

You want him to!?

“The fuck is wrong with me…” You mutter, then sigh, heading out in just your crop and panties to go to the bathroom, needing a shower so bad. You feel so wrong but so good and it’s really confusing.

You snatch up a towel out of the towel closet next to the bathroom then bump right against a hard body. His hands grip your waist, so tight, and you peek up at him nervously, tilting your head back, to meet that handsome face, see his tongue licking that scar, licking his full lower lip, before his eyes get dark.

You both just breathe, you clutching the towel to your chest, unable to move, unable to function, all you want to do is have him sling you against that wall and enter your throbbing little pussy. You want him so bad it takes everything not to snatch him up for a kiss, not to grab that cock that’s currently pressed against your tummy, not to kiss that scar on his face and drink his moans.

But you just stand there, a pathetic little breathy cry escaping your throat, and your eyes lock then, so much tension in the little hallway you could cut it with a knife. His breaths mingle with yours, and you watch his Adam’s apple bob up and down as he gulps, one of his hand coming to cup your face, so gently, with his big, rough hand, and you nuzzle it before you think better.

Shit.

“Are you feeling okay, doll?” He murmurs, surprising you and making you blink a bit, before nodding shyly.

“I’m just… sore.” You look away, and he laughs a bit, dark but soft, tilting your chin up then.

“Good sore?” You nod, and he exhales as if he had been holding his breath, bending low and kissing your forehead then. It feels too sweet, too good, his care, his lips on you… what was this? It makes you panic almost, your heart racing.

“Good sore.” You look back at him again, and ease back a bit, to get some semblance of composure, to catch a breath. The feeling of him is overwhelming your every sense you have.

“You’re beautiful as fuck even when you just wake up.” His words are husky, and you shake your head, making him glare.

“Toji I look like a racoon. I’m gonna take a shower.” The thought of you in the shower seems to torture him, he moans a bit, snatching you against him, and his lips are right against yours now. “Toji… we can’t right here-”

The door to your dad’s room opens and shuts, and you jump back and hurriedly run to the bathroom, leaning back and resting your head on the wall, feeling your eyes prick with tears at how badly you want him. You hurriedly rid yourself of your panties and tank, running the shower then, distantly hearing Toji and Shiu talking, laughing so casually.

You like him, don’t you? You really like him.

And how would that ever work, seventeen year age gap aside, how would it work with your dad, with Toji? With a whole kid, Megumi, who he wasn’t even around for much of his life. How would any of it work, it was stupid, stupid… and surely he just wanted to fuck you. Because what, it’s naughty, because it’s some kind of challenge or fun to him?

But the way he just looked at you…

Stupid. You’re stupid.

Later on after you’re all washed up you open the door, and pad over to your room, just to see him coming up the stairs, his eyes trailing down your body, covered only in a small little white towel. Your thigh press together while your hand is on the door knob, and Toji inches closer, until he’s right behind you, his nose and lips rubbing up the side of your damn neck.

“T-Toji… don’t.” You manage, and he exhales, breath tickling you, and your cunt is already dripping just from that.

“Ya regret it?” He asks huskily, and you turn to look up at him, shaking your head, gently touching the arm around your waist.

“Not at all. Not one bit. I’m just scared.” He exhales, and you feel his tense body ease some. Had he been worried?

“Hey Toji!” Your dad’s voice came then, and he kisses your lips, furiously, pressing hard for an intense moment, making you melt, before leaving you to go inside your room. Your breath is erratic, chest so tight it hurts, you can’t explain just what it is that you feel.

You can feel it like a brand on your skin.

***

“That sounds like a date, Dad.” You say later on, as you and Shiu have lunch together, Toji is already washing his dishes.

“Yeah but I’m not just gonna go on a date the one week you’re home.”

“Dad it’s fine. I come home once a month already.”

“Like for two days…”

“I liked seeing you happy. Don’t worry.”

“You’re too good a kid.” He kisses your head, and you catch Toji’s gaze then, that stupidly sexy smirk, making you shiver.

“Nah, not really.”

“You’re the best daughter a dad could ask for.”

Now you feel… like shit.

Who are you and what are you doing!?

“You sure you don’t wanna go though? She wouldn’t mind at all. She asked me to invite you two.”

“I mean…”

“Why don’t ya go out with her today and then we come for dinner? I’ll bring kiddo on the bike she’ll love it.” You glare at him then, but your dad seems happy.

“That would be perfect, give us some time and time for all of us. But… What if she kills you Toji?”

“You’ll help her hide my body.” They both laugh, shoving each other and joking around, and soon your dad is off to go meet with Mei, and you all are going to join them later for dinner.

“You’re such a schemer.” You mutter, and he wipes his hand on the dish towel, walking up to you then, slowly, you watch as the thin white shirt he wears showcases all his muscles, watch that line in his grey shorts.

“C’mere, Doll.” You eagerly do what he asks, and when he’s picked you up like you’re nothing, your lips slam in a kiss, furious and hungry, his teeth biting at your lips, tongue messy.

“Toji… please.” You whine out, and he groans then, looking at you and setting you down to stand.

“Want me to fuck this little pussy, doll?” You nod, no shame anymore, and then he’s shoving off everything on the dining room table, sitting you on it, you eagerly grind against the thigh that’s between your legs, crying out. “So fuckin desperate?”

“Fuck you, Old man.” He smacks you then, making you grin, and you reach up for his shirt, yanking his big body down to yours.

“Say it, fuckin brat. You’re soaked from nothing.” You just whimper, crying out when he pulls you by your hips, sliding down your shorts, the cool air of the kitchen against your glistening pussy.

“Am not.” He laughs then, grinning, so handsome and even charming… and you brush his inky black hair back, exhaling.

“I’ll have to talk to her and find out, you’re too full of it. She loves me.” He kisses down your thighs, grabbing the fat of your ass then, and you moan, this time even louder, as his long finger slides in you. “Oh fuck… you’re that wet?”

“Do something about it.” He raises a brow, smirking, and you giggle.

“You tellin me what to do, fuckin brat?”

“Mmhmm. Toji, fuck!” He’s lapping at you with that hot tongue, circling your clit before sucking it in his mouth. “Ohmygod- ngh!”

He’s got you so close in seconds it’s stupid, as his moan vibrates your clit, as his fingers slide in your slick entrance, and you’re pulling his face against you, brazenly, grinding your hips up and down. You start gushing wetness, as your head slams back against the hard table, and he’s licking you through your orgasm, as his fingers scissor into you.

“Please fuck me, please. Daddy.” At that he snaps, popping up, his face covered in your arousal, and he’s picking you up in his arms again. “No, just fuck me here. Now, please, can’t wait.”

He exhales, setting you down, turning you, and bending you over, making you shiver, as his big hand grabs your wrists and pulls them behind you. “Demanding lil slut for me, huh?”

“Shut up and fuck me. Ah!” He’s slid all the way in you then, thrusting so hard and deep it’s hard to take, your tiny body struggling to fit him inside.

“Shut that mouth up, huh? Fuckin brat.” You can’t manage a word, you’re just throbbing around the invasion, struggling to breathe, as he groans, yanking you by those trapped wrists, your body arching. “Got something to say, doll?”

Your answer is a choked out whine, and he lets you adjust to his size, just staying there for a moment, until he pulls nearly fully out, and you hear the squashing of your soaking wet cunt as she sucks him back in. He’s so deep you can’t even stand it, you just scream out, as he strokes again, again, again.

“Nothing to say, doll?” He taunts you, fucking into you now, hard and deep in your tight entrance, slamming your cervix now, and you’re blinded, while he massages that spot with the thick tip of his cock, over and over.

“M-m-more!” Is all you manage to get out, and he groans then, releasing your wrists and pulling you up by your ass, smacking it.

“Want Daddy to wreck this little pussy?” You nod, whining, and then he’s smacking your ass again. “Say it, doll.”

“F-fuck my pussy, wreck it. Please.”

“Please…”

“Daddy!”

Toji groans, guttural and deep, then he’s slamming into you, and you cling to the table desperately, as each thrust has your entire body shaking with the force, as his big hands are bruising your hip bones. He’s fucking you so hard you can’t think, slamming against you, the sounds of his strong thighs smacking against your plush ones echoing in the kitchen.

“F-fuck… pussy made f’me, ain’t it? Made for my cock.” You just whine nonsensically, as he is rhythmically pounding into you, it hurts but it’s such a good, delicious pain, so intense you don’t know how you’re even taking it.

“M-made for y-you… Daddy.” He’s grunting now, and a hand wraps in your hair, pulling it, making your back arch as he leans lower, fucking up into you now.

“Ya feel so fucking good, doll. Cum on Daddy’s cock. Now.” You do as he orders, how can you not, when his thick cock is wrecking your tight little cunt, when your walls are already tightening against him. “Fuck yeah, doll, like that.”

You’re screaming so loud god help you if anyone were around, as he’s shoving his cock in so deep, against your bruised cervix, making you cum so hard you see stars, your pussy clamping down, your body jolting and spasming. You struggle to hang on to any reality, imagining he’d slow down. But no.

He’s not stopping though, oh no, he’s just started it seems, as he’s fucking you through it, making you cum again. “Feel so fucking tight after… fuck, you’re such a good girl f’me.”

“Good for you… good for… cumming mmnh!” Your thighs are shaking as he pushes in so hard, at this angle so deep it was insane, and he leans forward, finding your clit then. “No, t’much…”

“Nah, be a good girl for me. Are you my good little girl?” You weakly nod, letting him roll his hips, in your cervix it feels like, fucking you up. You can’t even think or function as he rolls his fingers on your clit, and you’re soaking his hand, his cock, pulsing around him.

“Fucking-perfect-s’fucking…” You hear his breath, rushing out in pants, and he’s groaning, one arm wrapping around you now, dragging you down his length.

“Your good girl.”

“Mine?” You nod, mindlessly, as he keeps fucking you, fucking any sense, fuck you’d say anything as he makes you cum over and over, until you’re a whimpering mess, your thighs shaking, your knees threatening to give out.

“Please, no more, please, Daddy, I can’t-” He’s relentless, smacking your ass again, making you scream. “Aa-”

“You tappin' out doll? Not yet.” You just whine, and then he’s picking you up, turning you to him, your cunt is throbbing and pulsing, as he smirks down at you. “A whole fuckin mess.”

“F-fuck… off…”

“A gorgeous fuckin mess.” His eyes glitter as he talks, and you whimper, struggling to raise a hand to brush his hair, as he picks you up and carries you to the couch, laying you down. “Can’t even stand, huh?”

You just shake your head, there’s no sense lying. He has your thighs spread now, pushing them up, as you sink into the soft cushions of the couch, and he slides back into your aching cunt. You hiss as you’re stretched out again, skin burning, as your body forms to his length.

“Mm… s’good… s’much though I-ah!” He’s so deep in you, fucking you so hard, your legs feel like jelly even on your back, and he’s not letting up, not even a little bit, his hand is a vice grip on your hair, the other holding your leg up, and your orgasms are blending into one never ending wave of pleasure and pain.

“Say it, doll, say you’re a greedy slut. Just f’me.” You exhale, your vision blurring, everything around you fading. “I said, say it.”

He’s choking you now, big hand around your throat, and your hands cling to his hand, as you feel him bringing you wave after wave of pleasure and pain, as you lose your breath. He’s looking down at you, his dark eyes dilated, his hair falling over his forehead, drenched in sweat now, sweat that’s dripping onto your body.

“Slut… for… you. Daddy.” You breathe out the words, and his head falls back, raising your leg even higher and pushing in, you feel him thickening impossibly, feel his hand squeezing so hard.

“Gonna ruin this cunt for anyone else. It’s mine, doll. Yeah?” You just nod, weakly, feeling your ears ring as he chokes all the oxygen out of your body, and you feel like you’re high. “That’s my good girl, Daddy’s slut.”

He’s stroking in a bit slower, dragging his cock out, before slamming it back in, you screaming out every time he hits that spot, cumming again with the lack of oxygen, nearly fainting from it, and then finally, he’s letting go of your throat. You gasp for air as he leans low, caressing your face, soaked with tears.

“Ya look so fuckin pretty crying, doll.” His voice is dark, as he’s wrecking anything you’ve ever known, as his cock splits you apart. You just weakly cry, wrapping your arms around his neck then.

“Kiss me… please, Daddy.” You manage to whisper, voice hoarse, and he pauses then, moaning, kissing you deeply, slowing the previously vicious movements of his cock to gently rock into you now.

“Beautiful.” He murmurs, and you feel yourself crying more, he drinks all your sounds, now pressing your leg so far up it hurts, rolling up so his tip was grinding on your cervix, his pelvis against your clit now. “Cum again, doll. Please.”

His tone has shifted, and you nod, eagerly, pulling him down for another kiss, and his mouth makes love to yours as his cock shoves in, and you convulse around him, making him curse. He grips you tight, biting on your lower lip harshly, his hot breath against you, hands so tight you can’t think.

“Wanna cum in this sweet pussy, doll. So fuckin bad. You want me… oh fuck… ah-to pull out?” You tense, and then your eyes look up to his, as well fucked and blown out as yours. You grip him then.

“Cum in me… please. Please.” You whisper, and he loses it then, going feral over you, his eyes insane, his teeth bared.

“Cum in your little pussy, doll? Ya want all Daddy’s cum?” You nod, eagerly, whimpering as he picks up his pace again.

“Please… cum in me, Daddy.” At that he loses his rhythm, clinging to you, thrusts erratic, until he stills inside you, and you feel his cock pulse, feel his hot cum flood your insides. You wonder at the sensation, as heat pours in, and you’re so full. “Oh my god! Oh my…”

“Fuck… so fucking-ah-baby…” He nearly whines that last word out, as he clings to you tightly, pushing his cum even deeper, as your eyes lock onto each other.

You’re cumming around it, and he’s gripping you so tight, slamming his lips on yours again. Fuck, you feel so stretched, so used, and all you can do is hold onto him, feeling his warmth spread inside you, feeling his hot breaths against your mouth, his chest heaving with exertion.

“So fuckin’ good, doll. So fuckin’ perfect.” He’s whispering into your ear, kissing you again, and you feel emotion in your throat, overwhelmed. “Ah fuck… too much for you?”

“No. No. So good, Toji.” You swipe at your tears, but he swats your hands away then, using his own hands to wipe gently.

“Never felt something that good.” He murmurs, and you’re flushed then, so nervous, burying your head.

“You don’t have to say that, I know… you used to be in love. And there’s nothing wrong with that.”

“Doll, I don’t say shit I don’t mean.” Your eyes go back up to his, and the intensity overwhelms your already weak mind.

“I’m scared.” You whisper again. He frowns.

“Of what, getting caught?”

“Having feelings.” You curse inwardly then, looking away, but he holds your face still, lowering his face down, to where your foreheads are touching.

“Wanna tell me what feelings?” He asks, and for once you hear it, the vulnerability in his request. Your hands trail down his thick, muscular arms, as you take a shaky breath.

“Feelings for you.” He groans then, kissing you deeply, and you fall into it, before you pull back just a bit, shaking your head. “They’re stupid.”

“Nah, doll. I-” The doorbell rings then, and your eyebrows shoot up, as reality crashes over you, where you are, who you’re with. You freak out, but he shushes you, holding your shoulders. “Calm down, not your dad, he wouldn’t ring a bell. I’ll go get it… go clean up.”

You nod then, and he opens his mouth, as you wonder what he was going to say, then he just sighs, easing out of you, and his cum pours from your little hole, all swollen and red from how much he’d beat it up. He groans then, staring at it hungrily, leaning between your thighs again.

The bell rings.

“I’ll fuckin kill em.” You giggle, at the ridiculousness, and then let him help you up into a sitting position. He tosses you your shorts, and you run up the stairs, adrenaline pouring through you, as Toji’s cum leaks from your little pussy. What the actual fuck were you doing!?

“Just a package.” You hear, as he’s opening the door to your room then, eyeing you hungrily.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” You just nod, brushing your hair in your mirror, trying to put yourself together. “Wanna tell me what you were trying to say?”

“No. I don’t.” You put the brush down, and then he’s on you, behind you, slinging your leg up, in that position he’d shown you. Your breath catches, as you feel his cum and your arousal trickle out.

“I’ll fuck the intel out of ya, doll.” He’s got your shorts pulled to the side, shoving two thick digits in your entrance, you grip the dresser, looking at him behind you, brows drawn low as one of his hands comes around to grip you under your chin.

“Why do you wanna know? It’s stupid… mmm…” Your head falls back when you feel yourself pouring out all over his fingers, and he’s groaning, yanking up your top and revealing your breasts, staring at them in the mirror hungrily.

“Toji-again!?” You tense when you feel his hard length against you now, and he just smirks at you in the mirror.

“Again, doll. And again. Till all you think of is me.” His words hit you hard, and you gulp at it, not able to even think when his tip rubs against your sensitive clit, up and down between your folds.

“The things you say… fuck you for that.” You whisper, tears starting to hit your field of vision, as his dark green eyes study you, serious then.

“Fuck me, huh?” You nod, hating what he does, and how much you want it. You pull away a bit, putting your leg down, and he has you spun then, bending low with his hands on either side of your dresser. You tremble under his gaze. “I say what I wanna say, doll. Got a problem?”

“Yeah I sure do. You’re just confusing the hell out of me. If you’re gonna fuck me, do it, I clearly like it. But don’t say shit like that. Look at me like that.”

“Look at you like what, brat?” He cups your face then, and you take a shaky breath, as the energy in the room is too much to bear.

“Like… I don’t know, like that!”

“Like you’re fuckin gorgeous? Like I want ya so bad I can’t fuckin stand it?” You hate it, you hate how he’s cupping your face, how his eyes are boring into yours. You bite your lip so hard it’ll bleed.

“Yeah, like that. I hate it.” He scowls, yanking you by your hair and tilting your head back, forcing you to look at him.

“How ya want me to look at ya then?”

“Like you wanna fuck me, not… whatver that look is.”

He’s just breathing heavy then, and so are you, as your heart races and his cum is dripping out of you. “And what is this look you hate so much?”

“It’s as if you… really like me? I don’t know.”

“Ya think I don’t!?”

“You shouldn’t. You said just sex-”

“Nah, doll. You did.” You blink then, scowling up at him, as his lips are just a breath from yours. “You said last night ‘is it just sex’.”

“You said yes!”

“Because I- Y’know, fuck this. I’m over talkin’ now.” He smashes his firm lips against yours in a furious kiss, tongue sliding inside your mouth, taking it over entirely, as his hands are firm on your hips, a thigh sliding between yours. You moan, greedy hands grabbing at his shirt, until you’re yanking it off. He smirks. “Need me naked, huh? Slutty fuckin brat.”

“Shut up, old man.” You start pushing him then, and he clearly lets you (because how could you push Toji) until he’s sitting at the edge of your bed, and you’re yanking your top off over your head, looking down to see his hungry gaze, his big hands gripping bare breasts.

“So eager for me, huh doll?” He’s muttering the words, because he’s got your breasts in his face, sucking and lavishing the peaks, moaning. “These perfect tits, oh my… fuck.”

You straddle him then, thighs on either side, and he’s grabbing your ass while he’s sucking on your tits, rubbing his stubble between your breasts, and you’re whining out, grinding on his hard cock. He yanks his shorts down again, looking up at you with parted lips and dark eyes.

“You gonna fuck me, doll?” He teases you, making you glare, pushing him down on his back.

“Why don’t you shut up and let me fuck you, huh?” At that he scowls, flipping you under him, pinning your wrists. You scowl back now.

“Ya got a nasty mouth for such a pretty girl. Let me shut it up.” He’s shoving two fingers in your mouth deep, so deep you nearly choke, your nails digging into his wrist now as he doesn’t let you go.

“Mnh!” You try to yell out around his fingers but he’s already shoved his cock in you so deep you’re blinded, deep in your cunt, and she sucks him right in.

“You’re even prettier like this, with that mouth shut.” You bite his fingers then, smirking with glee when he yanks them back, laughing when he’s furious. “You’re such a fuckin psycho brat.”

“You like it, don’t you?” He smirks then, lifting your leg and sliding deeper, fucking into your cervix now. “Ah-fuck!”

“Yeah, I like it.” He murmurs, kissing you again, messy and rough, his now bitten fingers back in your hair. You’re screaming as he’s railing you, the bed creaking with his weight, grunting over you. “I do like you, by the way, slutty little girl.”

“Why-why… say that? Fuck you.” You’re whining out, and he’s got a death grip on your thighs, pressing them up high and hitting so deep you can’t function, so much pressure.

“Fuck you.”

“Fuck you!”

“I am fucking you, lil slut.” You laugh at that, breathless, but then he fucks the laugh right out of you, fucks your thoughts out of you. “That’s what I thought.”

“Let me fuck you-mnh-on top. Lemme do it. Please.” He grins down at you, as he’s slamming into your cunt so rough you ache, strokes sloppy inside you.

“Now you’re speaking right t’me.” He flips you so quick you lose your breath, and you rest your hands on his chest, crying out when he’s fucking into you now.

“Lemme… lemme do it! Fucking… stop moving, Toji, stop moving!” He grips your hips tight, shoving you on his cock, grinding inside you until you’re shattered, cumming all over him, arousal gushing and drooling out your cunt onto his thighs, his balls, his cock.

“F-fuck, you feel so good on me doll.” He’s moaning, and you see it, that moment where he relinquishes control, the moment you start rocking your hips, crying out and throwing your head back at how good it feels.

“T-Toji! Ngh!” Tears hit your eyes as his thick tip is massaging your cervix, and you tentatively slide up then down, as he watches his cock disappear, and his jaw tenses, his face in awe of you.

“Holy-Motherfucking-shit!” He’s gripping you so tight you can’t move, and you whine out, wiggling. “How are you so good at that!?”

“Shut up and lemme fuck you, just lay there.” He gulps, laying his head back, and you are dominating Toji Fushiguro, he’s nearly whimpering as you press your thighs, squeezing your cunt tight around him. “Good boy.”

You’re snickering, and then you realize you made a mistake, when he yanks you against his chest, glaring. You gasp. “Hang on, pretty little slut.” You manage to cling to him, excitement and fright in equal measures, and he’s lifted your hips up, pinning you against him. “Gonna fuck that attitude out of ya. Use ya like my little toy.”

“T-Toji I was just-ah, kidding!” He slams into you, so hard you nearly buck off his big hard body, and then he grabs your cheeks with his hand, squishing them.

“Aw, poor baby, got something to say?” You open your mouth and he’s slamming up into you again, your entire body feeling his thick cock, like he’s in your damn throat, it makes you choke up.

“I… I… please…”

“Toys don’t talk.” You wiggle a bit and he smacks your ass, making it sting, you cry out at it. “Toys don’t move. You’re gonna take all this cum like a good toy. Only good to fuck, to cum inside, that’s it. Got it?”

You down at him, as your pussy is gushing. “I thought I can’t talk, so how can I answer you dick!?”

He’s got you flipped again, putting you in a wicked mating press, folding you up so much it’s uncomfortable, and you watch that vein in his throat pulse as he hiffs over you. He’s fucking furious. And you’re thrilled at the reactions you elicit, grinning, until he’s shoved back in you, bottoming out so hard it hurts, you see stars, then your mouth is wide open in an O shape, tongue lolling.

“Watch me fuck ya, watch me fuck that cunt like I own it.” He groans out the words, as he’s slamming into you, so hard you’re crying out, his hands pressing your thighs down, making your eyes roll back in your head. “Got anything-ha- smart to fuckin say, toy?”

You can’t manage words, they get stuck in your throat, and you’re just shaking, crying out, because oh god it’s too much, it’s so much, his cock bullying inside your walls and wrecking you. All while he’s looking down at you, his chiseled jaw clenched tight, those veins in his neck bulging, every single muscle taut as he just holds you down.

“Cum all over my cock, be a good toy f’me.” You should hate that, yeah? But no. you’re cumming again, so hard this time, your orgasm spilling over and mixing with his cum that’s coating your insides.

“Mnh… ah-ngh…” You’re just whimpering out like it’s nothing, you can’t even function anymore, you’re cumming so hard still you’re just twitching under him, jerking under him.

“Ya like being used by me, don’t ya doll?” You manage a nod, with your sore neck, and he moans, bending down and cupping your face while he slowly rolls inside you, stretching your walls out, feeling so fucking good you can’t take it.

“D-d…D-” You don’t know if you can speak, so your watery eyes hit him, and he grins then with sharp white teeth, kissing you, softly, as if he wasn’t wrecking you with his thick cock, as if he wasn’t telling you you’re a toy. No, that kiss?

Fuck.

“You can say it, doll. I’ll allow one word.” He pushes in and rolls his hips, massaging that damn spot in there, and you scream out.

“Daddy!” He moans then, right against your mouth.

“Want Daddy to use his toy? Cum inside it?” You just nod, eagerly, cheeks red as he pounds inside your cunt, the sounds of the slapping of skin and how wet you are obscene.

He pins you down with an arm around your thighs, pressing even harder, and he’s thickening inside you now, and you’re helpless, just being used by him, being stretched by his thick length. You start to lose consciousness nearly, the feeling so good you can’t handle it anymore, it’s like every stroke you’re losing any sense, until there’s nothing left but him.

“Good. Fucking. Toy. S’good f’me. Take it, take all of me, hm?” He’s whispering it, that gruff deep fucking voice, and you nod, feeling the aftershocks of your orgasm, as his own cock starts to spurt, so much you feel it pulsing.

“Mmph!” You’re grunting with each thrust now, as he’s filling you up, his big cock shooting his hot cum, endless streams of it, deep in your pussy, filling you so hot and full. “Mnh… T-Toji…”

“Fuckin perfect. Fuck.” He’s out of breath now, as he eases your aching thighs down, rubbing them gently, massaging the sore muscles. You feel tears in your eyes, the emotion and overwhelming exhaustion making your throat dry. He’s leaning up, kissing your cheeks, the tears hot and sticky running down them. “Hey doll… look at me.”

Your eyes meet his, and you take a shaky breath, when he’s easing out of your sore cunt, throbbing from him still, drooling cum out of the little hole he’d been stretching out. You just look at him, wordless, struggling to catch a breath, but it keeps coming out in tears, mumbling incoherently while he strokes your hair, pulling you against his chest, his arms wrapping around you tight.

“Hey, Doll, you okay? Too much?” You shake your head, but you can’t form a word, he’s fucked your brain so stupid. “Talk to me, baby.”

“Just… a lot. A lot.” You whisper, and he’s running a hand down your spine, up and down in little strokes.

“Did I hurt ya or anything?”

“No. No. I loved it.” You sniffle and look up to see his concerned expression, studying your face intently.

“You’re crying though.” His voice almost sounds like he is pained. You take a shaky breath, snuggling up to his big body then.

“Overwhelmed. Brain not working.” He laughs a bit, and you enjoy that rare sound so much it’s scary to admit it.

“I know, baby, I know. S’okay. I got you.” You lean up and kiss him again, your hair draping softly over his broad chest, palm right over where his heart thumps wildly in his chest. He moans softly, cupping your face gently with those strong hands, exhaling as you brush your lips on his. “Gonna spit out your secret, now hmm?”

“You can’t fuck intel out of me, psycho.” He snorts at that, looking at you, as you try to match your breaths to his, slowing them down. “Why do you wanna know so badly anyway?”

“I’d like to know how you feel.” He sounds nearly choked as he speaks, and your eyes widen, lips parted then.

Fuck you’re gorgeous, every bit of your body, your face is so pretty Toji can’t imagine not looking at it ever again. And he’s terrified that’s what is going to happen, because why would you of all people be with him? Young and beautiful, ambitious, got your shit straight. Pussy so perfect he wanted to live with his cock buried deep inside of it, wanted to lick every inch of you every day of his life.

What started off as impulse was getting to be too much, because when he came inside you, your tight little cunt gripping him as he watched those pretty eyes roll back in your head? He was wrecked, further than he already was the first time he just kissed you. Kiss those reddened lips, bruised by him now, he runs a thumb down your full lower lip, cock twitching in response.

Toji had great stamina but this was ridiculous, he wasn’t a twenty something anymore, but fuck if he couldn’t stop getting hard just looking at you. Fuck, when you’d opened the door in those hello kitty pajamas, he’d been so hard he’s shocked you didn’t notice. Watching those lush tits bounce, looking at those perky nipples through your thin little top.

He’d wanted you then.

He’d wanted you for a long time, and hated himself for it, hated how many times he’d rubbed himself raw to your pictures, in your sexy little outfits with your friends, when you outshine them all. All shy and cute like you weren’t built to be fucked by him, like you didn’t have some goddess level body. Fuck he loved every inch, too.

He’d never had it like this, and he knows he’s an idiot. Coming here and knowing damn well you’d be here. Then when he’d tasted your sweet pussy, drank all your honeyed arousal, he could not get that taste out of his mind. He couldn’t get those blown out eyes out of his brain. He doesn’t even know how he’ll be able to be with anyone again.

Ruined him in four days.

You’re the worst.

“Toji I just… I am worried I really feel stuff. Is it a virgin thing? Will I like, get over this? It’s so stupid.” You look down, your long lashes casting shadows on delicate cheeks, all reddened from your exertions, trails of glistening tears glittering from the sunlight streaming in the room.

Since when does Toji Fushiguro notice shit like that!?

“Why is it stupid, because it’s me?” He asks, gruffly, and he watches your eyes shoot up to his, your mouth opening in a small O.

“What, no. I mean stupid because it’s just sex. Is this some clingy virgin shit I don’t know about?” He laughs, mirthlessly, and your brows draw together.

“Is this your way of saying you like me, doll?” You nod a bit, and his heart hurts, like someone is squeezing the fuck out of it, right where your little hand sat.

“I know this is some game-”

“You don’t know shit.” You blink a bit, pouting then, at his snappy tone, and he hates himself then. Fuck he’s stupid. It’s not like he’d be worth your time, aside from fucking you senseless, he knows he’s good at that. “Think I don’t like you?”

“I don’t know. Do you?”

“Why would I do this if I didn’t?”

“Because you think I’m hot?” He shakes his head.

“You’re beautiful, but no. It’s… more than…”

He gulps, he doesn’t know what to say. You lean in, cupping his face with your hands, as your breasts rest against his chest. His hands slide down your little waist, to the jut of your hips, moaning as he explores your curves. You straddle him once more, and fuck if he doesn’t wanna let you have the power.

Only you.

“More than what, Toji? Is this something more?” He manages a nod, unable to say shit, because he’s an idiot, an idiot for you. And you would just get burned. “It can’t be more though, can it?”

“It’s a shit idea. But I’m selfish as fuck.” You cry out softly, then, as he hardens against you. But he sees her, so reddened, swollen, puffy, he’d gone too rough with you, even if you liked it. “Lemme take care of ya.”

“Hmm?” Your eyes flutter shut, like you’re exhausted, as he helps you up then, sitting you on his lap for a moment. “What, is Daddy taking care of me?”

He’s hurting at that, at how fucking good the word Daddy sounds out of your pretty little mouth, as you look at him with cock drunk eyes. “Let’s shower, doll, I’ll wash your hair.”

“I had a shower this morning.”

“Another one. I’ll wash it better than you did.” You giggle, nodding, and letting him pick you up in his arms, you’re so tiny in them, resting your head on his chest.

“This is nice.” He hums to himself at that, starting to run the hot water, as you lean against the sink. He kisses down your neck, seeing the little marks he had left. You all would have to cover them he realizes, then things hit him a bit, just what he’s doing here with you. With his friend’s kid.

Reckless.

Stupid.

Dangerous.

But fuck, when you look at him like that? Toji would do anything to have one more second of it.

He craves being with you so bad it’s taking over everything. He looks over at you, holding his hands out, and you shyly take them, so sweet and pretty one moment, then the other you’re telling him to shut up and fuck you. Damnit he…

He’s stupid over you, not just your body either. All of you.

Shit.

Toji pulls you under the hot spray of the shower, just holding you against him, and it feels so fucking good. So good in his arms, as he treats you so carefully, after having fucked you so hard, the duality of him drove you insane. Now he’s carefully washing your hair with fragrant shampoo, the scent filling the little bathroom, and fuck does it feel good, his strong fingers massaging your scalp.

He rinses your hair and then runs conditioner in your hair too, turning you then and pressing you against the wall. You find yourself gazing up at him, and terrified for when and how this ends, but fuck if you’re not blissful right now. As he’s kissing you, down your neck, lips pressing on delicate flesh, his big hands rubbing your breasts, thumbs pressing over the peaks.

“Toji…” He hums, his hands roaming lower, down your waist, down your hips, grabbing your ass and making you cry out softly. “You’re being… sweet?”

He frowns a bit as he looks down at you, broad body taking most of the pounding hot water, water dripping down his handsome face, down his long dark lashes. “I’m not gonna fuck you like that and not take care of you after.”

You feel your face heat up, your body reacting to his words, to his touch, as he’s lifting you up, pressing you against the warmed tiles. Your hands grip his slippery shoulders, your manicured nails digging in just slightly, making him sigh in pleasure as he studies you.

“This is stupid. And dangerous. And it’ll hurt me.” He blinks then, shaking his head and kissing you again.

“I won’t let it hurt you. My little doll.” You melt, fuck you’re melting for him!? The man who just smacked you, choked you out, came in you twice. The one who fucked you so hard you hurt, in your childhood bed, and you want more, even more. “You won’t fuck anyone else ever, ya know that right?”

“That’s insane talk. You know that right?” You’re whimpering though as he’s easing you down, as he starts kissing down your body slowly.

“What, not ruined enough yet, doll? Gotta do more?” You just nod, and you’re a whole liar, as he smirks, on his knees right in front of you, throwing one of your thighs over his shoulder and kissing your clit sloppy. “Demanding little slut. Needy little cunt, too, huh?”

“F-fuck…”

“Tell her you only want me.” He whispers into your cunt, and you giggle a bit, before he’s devouring you, his tongue swirling your little clitoris, and it’s so sensitive you fall apart quickly. “So fuckin easy, can’t even wait? Cummin all over m’face.”

“You’re t’good… at it… Daddy!” He’s moaning at that then, shaking his head back and forth as he runs his tongue along your clit, side to side, up and down, and drinking everything that pours out of you.

“Good girl, cum all Daddy’s face.” He’s urging you, pushing you beyond your limits, and you’re just falling apart, your heart thrumming as the hot water pounds your overheated skin.

He’s lavishing every inch of your cunt, licking every part of your little cunt, sliding in your hole to drink more, and you can barely stand, clinging to him tightly. His lips trail down your thighs now, kissing and nipping every bit of you he could find, until he’s back up there, his face against yours.

“I don’t want it to end.” You murmur, delirious, drunk off him. He exhales, holding you again in his arms.

“Mine. Say it.”

“It’s stupid.” You’re nearly asleep in the shower, so spent, so weak, that he has to hold you up, kissing you sloppy, messy, the water pouring down his face.

“Say it, doll. Need to hear it.” You pause, as he’s unexpectedly vulnerable all over again, and you let him take over.

“What’s yours? My pussy?” You tease him then, but he shakes his head, kissing you again, kissing every thought you had left.

“All of you.”

“My body?” Your whisper is faint against the pounding of the water on your bodies, but he shakes his head, gripping you.

“All of you.” Your head is fuzzy, your mind blank, it’s all you can do to just let him hold you, as you weakly nod, and he’s kissing you again, taking everything that you were. You couldn’t think about anything, school, your dad, your life, there was nothing but how good it feels.

You’re so fucked.

Chapter 6

@queendessi24 @iheartsuya @farawayfromallthecrazylies

#toji x reader #toji smut #toji x you #toji fushiguro #jjk toji #toji fushigro x reader #toji x y/n #fushiguro toji x reader #jjk x reader #jjk smut #jujutsu kaisen toji #jujustsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen

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klaus-littlestwolf · 1 year ago

Note

Why am i ready for stalker aemond that has slow burn and is super angsty? like someone who isnt afraid of his scar in preschool then moves away but he found her in either social media or a sports meet and started stalking from then on and then he goes to the same college and remembers her schedule, which dorm shes in and trying to get in her room at night or is in the dorm across from her and ugh i could start a fic tbh

If you do start a Fic, 100% tag me in that sh*t! I would LOVE to read it, but because you sent it to me imma give it a go for you cause it sounds delicious! I hope it is everything you want it to be!

Yandere!Aemond. Major Stalking! You’ve Been Warned!

DD:DNE

Aemond considered Y/n to be a miracle from the day he met her.

It was the first day of Pre-School and he wanted to be anywhere but there, surrounded by other students. He wanted to be at home with his mother, or even his big brother, anyone just to get away from the staring children.

Aemond had learned almost as soon as his cousin had sliced his face open that while adults would stare, they would at least be discreet about it, children were not. Aemond, while being a child, didn’t consider himself one, and it was something most adults found amusing as he would much rather spend time with his mother or the adults in his family than with his siblings or cousins. He would rather read than play with toys, rather watch movies his mother liked than ones his siblings enjoyed, it’s just the way Aemond had always been…until her.

All of the children stared at him from the moment he walked in and said “goodbye” to his mother. The staff tried to direct the children away, told them it was rude to stare, but they weren’t always paying attention and trying to get a bunch of 4 year olds attention when they’re locked onto something is…difficult at best. Around lunch time the staff had left all but one in the room to prepare food for the kids and suddenly Aemond found a boy much larger than him to be holding his eyepatch in his hand, the children around him laughing and teasing immediately. The teacher was on the other side of the room and oblivious as Aemond tried to grab his eyepatch back, the other boy shoving him to the ground before he was suddenly laying right beside Aemond holding his crotch and wailing in pain. A blonde girl that Aemond could only describe as beautiful was standing above him with an angry look on her face.

‘What did he ever do to you?! Huh?! Leave Him Alone!’ She snatched the eyepatch from the portly child’s hand and moved to hand it back to Aemond who strapped it back on immediately. ‘Are you okay?’ Aemond nodded quickly, opening his mouth to speak but finding no words that would come out. ‘I’m Y/n, you’re Aemond, right?’ He nodded again, mouth hanging open dumbly and looking like an idiot he is sure. ‘I’m sorry he did that, No one should be mean like that for something you can’t help and you don’t have to tell no one nothing…I’m sorry, you want to be alone.’ She turned to walk away when he finally got his voice box to work…sadly it had been muted so long that the sound he finally made was a bit too loud.

‘NO!’ He exclaimed and she jumped, turning back to him instantly. ‘I’m sorry…I mean, no, I don’t want to be alone…it’s nice to meet you Y/n…do you want to sit with me for lunch?’ She smiled, a red tint to her cheeks and Aemond decided he absolutely adored her pretty smile.

‘Yeah…that sounds fun.’ She grabbed ahold of his hand and pulled him over to a table, handing him a place mat and some crayons to decorate it with. Coloring was never something Aemond had really enjoyed, Art wasn’t his thing, but if Y/n enjoyed it then so did he.

Aemond and Y/n spent the rest of the day together before pick-up and as soon as he said “good-bye”, leaving with his mothers driver and climbed into the car beside his mom, he was talking about her. Alicent was thrilled that her son had made a friend his own age, while it’s entertaining to see her 4 year old boy so grown-up and mature, she didn’t want him to miss out on being a child just because he didn’t have any friends.

At the end of the week, after learning that Aemond and Y/n’s friendship wasn’t going anywhere, Alicent stood outside to pick her son up rather than wait in the car for their driver to get him. She watched her son run outside, hand in hand with a girl a bit shorter than him and they looked truly adorable. ‘Mom!’ Her son exclaimed, excited to see her waiting for him herself and deciding she should do this more often to see that smile so rare on her baby’s face.

‘Hello, my sweet Little Dragon! How was your day?’ She asked, watching the girl run to a women a few feet away and take her hand.

‘It was so good! Y/n and I made pictures of our families for the wall-wait! You need to meet her! Y/n!’ Aemond exclaimed, the girl stopping and her mother looking back as well, slightly irritated. ‘Mom, this is Y/n, she’s my best friend!’ He grinned and so did Y/n who hugged him at that deceleration.

‘Well, if she’s your best friend then you must have her over for a play date. Would that be alright?’ She asked the girls mom.

‘Oh, yes, of course. Anytime.’ She spoke, writing down her number on a piece of paper. ‘I’m Marie, it’s nice to meet you, Y/n talks about your boy all the time.’

‘Mom!’ The girl whined, the mothers sharing a side smile at their kids evident first crush on each other.

‘It’s lovely to meet you, I’m Alicent. How about tomorrow? She can come by and spend the day with us, I’ll drop her at home after dinner?’ Her mom looked surprised.

‘That’s perfect actually, I have work all day. Text me your address and what time to drop her off, she will love spending the day with Aemond rather than the neighbor. I’m sorry to say I’m in a rush to get back to work, it was nice meeting you Alicent, and you too Aemond. Come on Y/n, let go.’

‘Bye Aemond!’ Y/n waved, her mother dragging her off. She didn’t strike Alicent as rude, just in a bit of a hurry. You could clearly see the difference in their status in life, if not just from the fact that Y/n’s mother was wearing a waitress uniform and Alicent was wearing a Versace dress and Gucci shoes. She finds herself wondering how the women pays for the fancy daycare at all.

Alicent had married rich, Viserys happy to give her anything she wants as long as she doesn’t bother him at work, and he’s always at work. When he’s not however he is spending time with his daughter from his first marriage, Rhaenyra. Rhaenyra is 24 now, Viserys being significantly older than Alicent but she didn’t mind, he was a good, gentle man and that was hard to come by now a days. She had 2 sons, Jace who was 5 and Luke who was 3 (a child she detested for being the one who had sliced her baby’s face open 6 months before as he ran around the mansion with an old dagger from Viserys’ office and didn’t pay attention to her son sitting on the ground), though Rhaenyra was also pregnant with another child, none of which are her husbands clearly but that’s not her business… Alicent has 3 children of her own, Aegon who was 7, Helaena who was 5 and Aemond who had just turned 4, though she also suspected she was carrying a child that she hoped was a girl if not just to keep another boy from the chaos and bullying that goes on between the siblings and cousins.

‘Y/n is gonna spend the whole day with me?!’ Aemond suddenly exclaimed, knocking his mother from her thoughts.

‘Yes, she is. You’ll need to plan what you two want to do for the day and I’ll make sure Aegon doesn’t disturb you.’

‘Jace and Luke either?’ He asked…begged is more like.

‘Jace and Luke either, I’ll make sure they have something to do when they come tomorrow.’ The family always came to the house on the weekends as Viserys took that time for his family…part of it anyway.

‘Yay! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!’ Alicent was thrilled to see her son so happy…she had no idea it would be so incredibly short lived.

Y/n had begun spending the day with Aemond every day, coming to their house in their car after school, her mother coming to get her after work to take her home looking more tired than the night before. Alicent had tried to help the poor women. It turns out her husband had cheated on her while she was pregnant and gotten another women pregnant, divorcing her for his mistress and son. He’s the one who paid for the fancy preschool while her mother worked 3 jobs to keep everything afloat in their one bedroom apartment, since he paid for such a nice school he only paid 200 in child support leaving Marie with everything else and all the debt he had left behind in her name.

Alicent was happy to watch Y/n whenever she needed, it made her son happy and that’s all she wanted in the world. She had been so scared for him before he met Y/n that he would end up going down a dark path, the bullying at home and at school having been hard for him as well as his father clearly loving the child who had butchered him more than his own son.

That all came to a grinding halt however when Y/n’s mom was evicted from her apartment leaving them homeless, forcing them to move in with Marie’s ex-mother in-law who lived in New York. Aemond had tried to promise to visit every weekend before Alicent was forced to explain just how far away New York was from California, to say the children were upset was a huge understatement. The teary good-bye nearly broke the mothers hearts as they swore to write to each other every day, and they did, they both learned to write faster than any of the kids their age just to write to each other and it lasted about a year. Y/n’s grandmother had found out she was writing to a boy in California and cut it off, threatening to take Y/n away from her mother if her mother didn’t stop the interaction. Marie wrote Alicent and explained what had happened leaving her to break her baby’s heart all over again.

Aemond became cold after that. He had no more friends, detested his cousins, tolerated his brothers and only loved Helaena though she was with friends everyday of her life. He took his schooling very seriously, taking several extra curricular’s on the side to take up his time which consisted of Jiu-Jitsu, Tae Kwon Do, and oddly enough, sword fighting which Alicent didn’t support right away until he promised to start with fencing. It turned out that he was really good at it and his father hired a trainer, Criston Cole, to teach him sword fighting, paying to transform a room in the mansion into a training room.

Once Aemond got to middle school, no one was bullying him anymore after breaking 3 kids noses and 2 of their arms. When he turned 14 and moved up to high school he had finally broken down and created an Instagram account. Aemond hated social media, he found it annoying and pointless, but he quickly found a use for it once he looked up Y/n and found her account. It wasn’t private, making it easy to look through all of her pictures, finding out that she still lived in New York with just her Grandmother now as her mother had passed away in a hit and run with a drunk driver when she was 9. She had many pictures with her and another girl who seemed to be her best and only friend and nowhere could Aemond find anything about a boyfriend which gave him an instant sense of relief. He had spent the last almost 10 years obsessing over her, though he kept it to himself. He had sent her a letter a few years before, hoping that maybe now that they had grown a bit she would be able to write him back but it was returned unopened with a note that told him to never send anything again or her grandmother would file a restraining order.

For the next 2 years he was as content as he could be watching her life through social media, until their junior year that is when he decided to pay a man to hack into her computer, actually watching what he did and figuring out how to go about doing it himself. He read all of her emails from then on, finding out what colleges she was applying to and applying himself, knowing he would obviously get in with his incredible grades and extra curricular’s. Her grandmother was forcing her to go to college, wanting her to be a physical therapist despite the fact that she wanted to be an artist. Aemond had found she had a separate, secret Instagram account that her grandmother didn’t know about that held all of her paintings and sketches, and she was honestly incredible.

Aemond had decided that when she was his she would drop out of college and move in with him, she would have her own little art studio to do whatever she wanted in. He would buy her anything she wanted, give her everything in the world if she only asked for it, Y/n Y/L/n was going to be his wife…whether she knew it yet or not.

At 18, Aemond moved out to New York for the year, deciding not to go to college but convincing his father to open a branch of his publishing business out there and let him set everything up for him. It wouldn’t be hard, honestly Aemond would pay others to do everything and just oversee the company while he watched over his Princess. He had already been stalking her online for over 4 years and in her own computer for 2, this was hardly a step up.

Alicent knew of course, she knew that her son had become more than a little obsessed with his childhood friend and she knew that that’s why her boy was going to New York, she had been the one to talk her husband into letting him go. She wanted him to be happy, by any means necessary after all this time of misery and if he needed Y/n to make that happen then she was more than happy to welcome the sweet girl into the family. Even if she knew what her son was doing was wrong, she couldn’t change his mind, and she didn’t want to. Alicent loved Y/n and she knew that if there was one person in the world that her son would never hurt, it was her.

He watched from across the Quad as she arrived at the school, unpacking her things from the car and moving it all into her dorm room, a room which Aemond had made sure was a single for only her, he also made sure he had acquired a key for himself. He felt horrible that he couldn’t help her move things, especially the heavy things, but he knew there was no way she wouldn’t recognize him, and she clearly remembered him. She had several old pictures uploaded to her Instagram of the two of them together, one of them at a Carnival with their faces painted (which she had made him do, even forcing the painter to paint over the eyepatch since it would wash off), one of them carving pumpkins on Halloween, and Aemond’s personal favorite, a picture of the two of them snuggled up in his bed as she had slept over the night before, she was snuggled into his chest with his arms around her and his face in her hair which covered the scar completely. He knew she had plenty of pictures of the two of them without his eye patch on but she never put them online and he loved her for that, even if she didn’t know it yet. Next to his mother, she was the only person who really understood how sensitive he was about his scar and she never made him feel less than because of it, he knew she would never betray him, not even having shown her mother the pictures without the eyepatch.

He followed her to all of her classes, often watching them through the security cameras he had hacked into (becoming quite good at it) to see her during class, he had always loved her look of concentration as her eyes narrowed and she looked like she was scowling at you, she was adorable. He had placed several cameras in her room as well, watching her whenever he could, all she really did was school work and he realized how overwhelmed she was by college life, school was never her environment, it was too stressful for her and her free spirited mind and he knew it. He also knew that her Grandmother had threatened to kick her out onto the streets if she didn’t go to college for what she told her to, he had plans for that women, she will get what she deserves.

On several occasions he was witness to moments that he knew should be private, whether that be her stressed out crying or more…intimate moments. He couldn’t help but watch as her fingers touched her pretty little pussy, rubbing her clit and listening to the sweet sounds she made trying to be quiet, he couldn’t help but wrap his fingers around his length and edge himself right along with her, imagining those fingers in her cunt were his cock, desperate to feel her soft, warm pussy squeezing him as tight as it could as he made her cum again and again until she couldn’t take it anymore. He had fantasized about making her cum on his cock since he was 13 years old and by now he was more than desperate for her.

There were a few nights he actually snuck into the dorms and into her room, watching her sleep up close, trailing his fingers down her body, hating that he can’t just crawl into the bed beside her and hold her tight while he shoves his cock into her and makes her fall asleep with it as deep as it can get.

2 months he watched her before knowing he needed to make her his now, before it was too late. She had been asked out on a date by a Frat guy, begging to take her to a party and Aemond knew he couldn’t allow this.

The Frat boy got a visit from him later that night, waking up to Aemond sitting on the edge of his bed and realizing he had been tied down so tight that the ropes were cutting off circulation to his hands and feet. ‘Hello Chad, so sorry to wake you but this is a very important matter you see. Scream, and I will bash your brains in before anyone can even find out the door is locked, got it?’ He nodded quickly, terror in his eyes and Aemond found that he loved it, he loved scaring people that would hurt his Princess, she doesn’t deserve the kind of treatment this idiot would give her and Aemond knew that party wasn’t anything more than to make fun of his girl. The Frat assholes all getting a freshman girl to come to the ‘party’ and whichever guy could get their girl to put out first won some bullshit prize.

No. His Princess would not be humiliated like that.

‘You see Chad, you are bringing a girl back here tomorrow night, her name is Y/n, yes?’ He nodded again.

‘I didn’t know she was your girl, she didn’t say anything like that! I would never-‘

‘Yes you would, don’t lie to me Chad, boyfriend or not you would happily have brought her back here and made her a part of your little game.’ His eyes widened, unsure how Aemond could possibly know about that. ‘You’re not going to pick her up tomorrow Chad, do you understand? I will not have my Princess hurt and humiliated by an idiotic asshole who realistically couldn’t make a girl smile let alone cum. Now, this is just a warning of course, if I find out you went anywhere near her after our little conversation here, I would have to do something far worse than break into your disgusting Frat house and break your eye socket, do you get me?’

‘Yes! Yes, I-wait…break my wha-‘ quickly Aemond brought the bat he had picked up from the floor, down against the jackasses face, shoving the edge of his blanket into his mouth as he went to scream.

‘Secretly, I hope you do try something just so I get to have an excuse to come back here and break every one of your ribs before I ensure no women will ever say yes to a date with you again.’ He flicked open a blade, holding it against Chads face and hearing him whimper like a bitch. ‘It’s okay Chad, I’m not going to hurt you as long as you do what I’ve said here tonight. Are we on the same page?’ He nodded quickly and Aemond stood, walking out of the room and leaving the house, deciding on taking the bat with him, just in case.

The next night Y/n waited in the Quad at 9 o’clock, cursing out the asshole who didn’t pick her up and feeling the tears welling up in her eyes. She had been so alone here all this time, in a place she didn’t want to be at in the first place and just when she thought someone might be interested in her, even an asshole Frat jock, he stands her up. She felt like she couldn’t hold it in anymore, trying to muffle her cries with the sleeves of her hoodie before hearing someone speak to her.

‘Are you alright Princess?’ Princess? No one had called her Princess since-

Her head snapped up and she saw a very tall man standing about 5 feet away, he was lanky but still covered in muscle that you could clearly see through his tight henley shirt, he wore jeans and heavy boots with his silver hair tied in a bun at the back of his head. They black eyepatch sealed the deal for her though, if she didn’t already assume who this is, now she knows. ‘Aemond? Is that you?’

‘In the flesh…why are you crying Princess?’ He moved to sit beside her on the edge of the fountain and she just stared at him in shock.

‘I…I got stood up-what are you doing here?!’ He smiled sweetly and she couldn’t help but think how handsome her best friend had become…he’s a panty dropper!

‘I’m in New York setting up a branch here for Dad, the school however, my father has recently become a benefactor of, Daeron wants to come to school here for a year to start his doctorate in 2 years, you know dad, start bribing them as early as possible.’ He joked and she giggled, remembering exactly how Viserys used to be. She never had seen him much, which she understood was Aemond’s experience too, but he was always very sweet to her, bringing her gifts and sweets with all of his other children since she was there almost 100% of the time.

‘Did you know I was here?’ He nodded and she glared half heartedly at him. ‘Why didn’t you tell me?!’ She raged, punching him in the arm.

‘We’ll mostly because I sent a letter a few years after you left and your grandmother wrote back that I would receive a restraining order if I ever contacted you again. That’s why I never reached out online either, I didn’t want to get you in trouble if she found out.’ Her face fell as he told her that and her tears began streaming again. ‘No more tears Princess, please? Such a gorgeous girl should never feel the need to shed a tear.’ He reached up, taking her face in his hands and wiping her tears with his thumbs tenderly.

‘I’m sorry she did that to you! I wanted to talk to you so badly, everyday! She was so awful to my mom and I thought maybe I would be able to talk to you when we were older but she kept tabs on everything I ever did and now I’m being forced to go to this shitty fucking school and live on campus all alone, and suffocate under a course load that I didn’t want in the first place…I just wanted to paint…and the first time I think maybe I could actually not be completely alone here I get stood up by an asshole Frat jerk!’ Aemond had pulled her to his chest as soon as she started ranting, knowing she needs someone to be there for her and he was determined to make sure it was him. ‘And now I’m ranting to you when you clearly have places to be, I’m sorry!’ She tried to pull away but he didn’t let her, lifting her into his lap for good measure and smiling at the squeak that came from her when she was sat down on him.

‘None of that Princess, you have always been and will always be most important, and I finished my meeting. I’m all yours.’ He said it in a way that he hoped she would hear his dedication to her, and she did, she heard it and couldn’t help but hope he meant he really was all hers. ‘Do you have classes tomorrow?’ She shook her head, resting it against his chest and he felt his entire body heat up as he held her to him firmly, determined that no one would ever take her away again. ‘Okay, then here’s what we’re going to do. We’re going to go back to my place, you’re going to borrow some clothes and we’re going to order dinner-‘

‘No, you have things to do, you’re working here, I can’t-‘

‘No, I can’t! I can’t leave you like this, and I won’t, I will take care of you…you’re mine Princess.’ She looked up at him shocked and he tried his best to convey how hard it’s been without seeing her for the last 14 years. ‘I let them take you from me once, I won’t do it again now that I’ve found you…don’t make me let you go back to a dorm all alone…I won’t do it Y/n.’ She nodded her head quickly, wrapping her arms around his neck and hugging him tightly.

‘I missed you so much Aemond, if you’re sure you’re not too busy-‘

‘I will never be too busy for you. My weekend is yours, come on.’ He helped her stand up but didn’t let go of her, keeping his arm around her waist as he took her bag and led her down to the parking lot where his car is waiting. Aemond opened the door and lifted her into the car, hearing her gasp as he man handled her in, not once complaining about it. The drive was quick back to his home, it was an apartment in a high rise building and he loved watching her eyes slowly widen as she watched the numbers on the elevator go up and up, all the way to the top.

‘You have a penthouse apartment?’ He nodded, smirking down at her and she shoved him playfully.

‘Surely you can’t forget how we live Y/n, you think my father would let me stay anywhere else. Even if I am the least favorite, he insists on a certain condition of living for his family…he would be appalled by your state by the way, and I’m sure once I tell him he will be fixing it-‘

‘What are you talking about? I’m already in a single dorm, I have everything I-‘

‘You shouldn’t be living in a dorm room with God knows how many other women all sharing a bathroom, you’re basically family-‘

‘But I’m not.’ She cut him off and he looked at her startled as he opened the door. ‘Look at this place Aemond! It’s an apartment and I could never afford something like this! I love that you think of me as a sister and your parents think of me like an honorary child but I’m not, I am a peasant compared to you and that will never change, we live in 2 different worlds Aemond.’ He stared at her, trying to calm himself before opening his mouth.

‘You loved being a part of our family…you never judged me for how I lived before-‘

‘I’m not judging you-‘

‘But you are! I don’t like the idea that you think we’re in 2 different worlds, because I never want to exist in a world where you are not beside me, you will never live like that again, not now that I’ve found you. And the fact that you think I ever thought of you like a sister…well it’s just disgusting.’ He explained, leaning down and brushing his lips against hers as lightly as possible before moving to the kitchen, putting her bag on the couch. ‘Now, what would you like for dinner? Are you still a pizza girl, or would you like Chinese? We can get burgers too.’ He offered, pulling out a burger place menu, knowing that’s what she would pick and she quickly did, her whole face red in a heavy blush.

They ordered dinner and Aemond had a man go and pick it up for them while they chose a scary movie to watch. Aemond had loaned her one of his Henley’s before getting her a pair of his boxers from the drawer and letting her change, throwing her clothes into the wash and not being able to stop the creepy stalker inside of him from smelling her panties before putting them in. He had to stop himself from jumping her the second he walked back into the room, seeing his Princess wearing his clothes and sitting in his bed clearly waiting for him.

He set the food down, handing her her chocolate milkshake before stripping to his boxers and climbing into the bed beside her. He saw her try to hide her reddening cheeks as she looked at him, staring at his muscular chest before tearing her eyes away. It wasn’t until he noticed her rubbing her legs together that he felt his cock begin to twitch. She was just as effected by him as he was by her and he was going to have her!

They talked through the movie while eating, getting to know each other, mostly her getting to know him but he asked questions to things he knows the answers to but shouldn’t, and he loved that no matter how personal, she never once lied to him about anything. After all this time she still felt completely comfortable with him.

‘Oh! Mother will be so excited to see you! Come here!’ He held up his phone and pulled her to him, taking a picture of them quickly with her back to his chest as his arm wrapped across her shoulder and torso, his face nuzzled against her hair. It smelled like mangos and pomegranates, everything about her was just perfect.

‘Wait! You’re shirtless! She’s gonna think-‘

‘What?’ He asked, smirking down at her, humor written all over his face as he waited for her to say it. ‘What is she going to think, Princess?’

‘Nothing, never mind.’ She rolled her eyes, leaning against him as the movie finished, Aemond now laying down on the pillows with her head on his chest as if they were children at a sleepover once again.

‘I really did miss you Y/n…there wasn’t one day that I didn’t think about you.’ He willed his cock to stop twitching as she traced her finger around his stomach.

‘I missed you too, I never forgot about you Aemond. You know, I often wondered how someone who had been in my life for such little time could be such a big part of it but you were…you are. I never stopped loving you.’ He took hold of her chin, turning her head to face him and traced her bottom lip with his thumb lightly.

‘I am never leaving you again…tell me you’re mine.’ She gasped quietly, hesitating only a moment before nodding. ‘I know you want me…tell me you’re mine Y/n…tell me.’

‘I’m yours-‘ He cut her off instantly, lips crashing to hers hard and pulling her against his chest firmly. One arm held her waist firmly while his other hand buried his fingers into her hair. He licked her bottom lip, his tongue instantly exploring her mouth as she parted them, sucking her tongue between his lips and making her giggle. Her arms wrapped around his neck, pulling the hair tie out and tugging it firmly prompting him to bite down on her lip roughly making her squeal.

‘Such fun noises you make, you’ve no idea how long I’ve wondered what you would sound like for me!’ He rolled on top of her, hauling her legs up around his waist and grinding his crotch against her.

‘Oh! Oh Fuck Aemond! Feels so good!’ She whined as he ground his hard cock down against her.

‘You have no idea Princess, I’m going to make you see stars.’ He swore, grabbing ahold of the bottom of his shirt and pulling it up and off of her. ‘So fucking perfect baby, perfect fucking tits!’ His lips wrapped around her rosy nipple, sucking hard and chuckling when her back arched up into him as he did this. He switched tits, pulling her hardened peak between his teeth teasingly before beginning to kiss and suck his way down her stomach, fingers catching on her boxers and pulling them down, throwing them off to the side of the bed. He took a pause, leaning back and looking down at her…Finally seeing his girl on his bed laid out for him…nothing could be sweeter. She closed her legs awkwardly, unsure why he stopped but he quickly caught them, yanking them apart again roughly. ‘No you don’t gorgeous! You’re mine, all mine. I’m allowed to look at what’s mine. All fucking mine.’ He growled, leaning back down and shoving his face between her legs, tasting her for the first time. Aemond lifted her legs onto his shoulders, sucking on her clit and grinning as he heard her loud, needy cries.

‘Fuck, yes! Please? Please Aemond, don’t stop?!’ Stop? Stop? What is Stop? He couldn’t define that word right now, it didn’t fucking exist to him as he flattened his tongue and traced it down to her hole, pushing into her and moaning at how tight his little cunt was for him. He peeked up at her as he began fucking into her with his tongue, his nose brushing against her clit and making her squeal. ‘Oh God!’

‘No!’ He cut her off, fingers rubbing hard at her clit as he looks up at her and she tries to pull away from the almost painful attention on her body. ‘Tonight, I am your God. Do you understand me? Tonight you pray to me while I worship this body. Yes?’

‘Yes! YES! Please God, Please?!’ She sobbed, tears falling from her eyes now as she teetered on the edge, so close and needing one last push.

‘Yes Princess.’ He moaned, pushing his long fingers into her and shoving her over that edge just as she needed, watching her face contort in ecstasy as she came, hips lifting off of the bed as she screamed.

‘Fuck Aemond!’

‘There’s my good girl! Cumming so good for me.’ He kissed his way back up her body, removing his boxers as he did and leaning against her, taking his thick cock in his hand and preparing to push himself into her. ‘How do you feel baby?’ She just moaned, nodding her head and pulling him down to kiss her and as she did he pressed his cock against her hole, driving his hips home and finding her cute little squeal completely adorable. ‘So good!’ Aemond groaned, pulling out and pushing into her again. ‘So fucking tight on me, aren’t you?’ She nodded, her mouth hanging open as if screaming but no sound was coming out. ‘Yes you are, so good to me, this little pussy loves my cock so much, feel how she’s pulsing around me? She knows my cock is the only one that can make you feel like this. The only one that ever will again.’ He had picked up his pace and was now slamming into her over and over again. ‘You’re mine now Princess, all mine! Mine to care for, mine to love, mine to fuck! Isn’t that right?’

‘Yes! Yes Aemond! All yours! Please, please never stop! Oh Fuck!’

‘No need to beg Baby.’ Tears were now leaking down her cheeks and he knew he had her just where he wanted her. He could get her to agree to anything he’d like. He felt her cunt tighten around him and watched her eyes roll up as she came around his cock, squeezing so good he could make a case for why this wasn’t Earth anymore but Heaven that they were tethered to. His thumb found her clit as he sat back, thrusting into her at a rapid pace and feeling his end approaching quickly, throwing her into another orgasm before allowing himself to finish, burying his cock inside of her as deeply as he could and filling her up. ‘That’s it. Good Girl, taking all of me so good. I’m gonna take you home, back to where you belong with our family. No more school you don’t want to be in, no more grandparents you despise, just you and me and all of the babies that I’m going to fill this body with. How does that sound?’ Y/n’s responding moan was answer enough for him, whether it was meant to be or not. ‘All mine now Princess…all mine.’

Aemond T. Masterlist

Stalker Aemond Moodboard

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randomishnickname · 1 year ago

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Must-read Destiel fics - my superduper Nov. 5th rec list

Three years ago, on the blessed day of November 5th, 2020, I had:

never seen an episode of SPN,

only had a vague inkling of what the two pale coconuts were on about,

and I hee-heed and ha-had with the rest of Tumblr about the love confession scene and the Internet errupting in an unparalleled craze

At first I thought, that's it.

Then ... I got curious. I watched some YouTube Destiel supercuts. I read some fic (I think @andhumanslovedstories beautiful Cas/OC fic was my entry point?). I read meta. I watched some more YouTube scene packs. I read even more fic. I watched some of S4, some of S1, some random fan fav episodes. And then Destiel lodged itself so deeply, thouroughly into my brain that it took over and hasn't relinquished control in the last two years. The most tenacious, pervasive brain worm to date.

This ship got it all, and this fandom got it all, and there's such delightful, powerful, batshit crazy, romantic, expertedly crafted fanfic out there, it's like being a starving child in the world's biggest candystore.

So without further ado, here's some of my very favorite fics from this infinite trove, with all my thanks to the wonderful writers who keep delighting and awing me with their dedication and craft. There'll of course be some recency bias at play but you can browse my bookmarks over here to chose from over 100 excellent and well-curated SPN stories.

💕CATEGORY: SWOONWORTHY💕

Wildly romantic fics that warm you up from the inside.

It Won't Be Perfect by someonetoanyone (10K words) Summary: Dean daydreams about what it'd be like to let himself love Cas freely.

Why I love it: the humor, the spot-on characterizations, and the quintessential late season Destiel-ness of being so deeply love with your best friend that it's too big to actually do anything about. Just. So warm.

Rock Lobster by Ginger Fail (13K) Summary: Cas decides that the lobsters Dean planned to cook need to get back home. Impromptu beach vacation ensues!

Why I love it: This road trip story is fresh and invigorating like a sea breeze! Fun, entertaining and full of deep, deep fondness.

Seek to Know You Better by ahurston (32K)

Summary: On a road trip, Dean and Cas play the 36 Questions That Lead To Love.

Why I love it: They’re so deliberatedly, carefully starting a relationship here. They try so hard to bridge the gaps and meet each other halfway. A very mature take on love that feels nourishing.

☢️CATEGORY: BRAINWORMS GALORE☢️

Fics that make you go BARK BARK BARK.

samson went back to bed by piesexuality (9k, @twoheadedcas) Summary: Cas strikes a deal with Chuck - keeping his family together comes at the price of their free will.

Why I love it: What if Cas got his revenge for the Mala'ak box? What if love came at the price of everything you've been fighting for? What if a story twisted the knife oh so sweetly? Each word of this one lands a punch. Made me insane in the best of ways (cue pinned fanart).

In sickness by @saintedcastiel (41K) Summary: S4 redux but Castiel has a fetish: giving Dean the sniffles.

Why I love it: This one is soooo. Can barely find words for it. It taps into Cas' early season alienness and psychosexual obsession with Dean, brilliantly demonstrates Casdean vs Samruby parallels, and each word is just. Perfect. ARGH!

so much smoke in a hall full of mirrors by AreYouReady (6K, @autisticandroids ) Summary: Godstiel is losing his heavenly war. Crowley provides a compliant Dean-doll for him to release his frustrations upon.

Why I love it: Urgh, this one is sooo dark. Taps into the scary, intimidating and alien aspects of Godstiel so well. Gore, consent and psychosexual issues galore. Delicious.

Special mention: In a Parked Car, Exhuming Ophelia by @an-android-in-a-tutu (17K). Still need to comment properly ;)

💣CATEGORY: EMOTIONAL WRECKING BALLS💣

Angsty fics that tear you to pieces to remake you better.

What Used To Be Mine by someonetoanyone (48K words) Summary: Dean never makes his apology prayer in Purgatory - Cas dies, Dean mourns.

Why I love it: Oh god, this is a heavy hitter. Just, straight up insurmontable grief, packaged in poetic, raw language to make you shed tears and tears. Loved it so much.

Ignite your bones By ilovehowyouletmefall (67K, @angelinthefire) Summary: Dean accepts Chuck's deal: killing Sam to save the world.

Why I love it: Cruuuuel cruel premise for a story that doesn’t pull its punches. It gets dark in Dean’s head and everyone around him suffers. Wonderfully written. The ending set my brain on fire.

Right Where you Left Me by outdean (93K, @armandgender)

Summary: Cas comes back from the Empty after 10 years to find Dean married to another man.

Why I love it: This one is a riiiide. When grief has become a part of you but your love comes back… When you return from the dead and have to carve a new space into the world for yourself... nothing is easy here, but the emotions are INTENSE. Also, autistic!Cas for the win.

Special mention: Who Ya Gonna Call? by saintedcastiel (50K) and Clear skies in spring by enochianprayer (WIP)

💥CATEGORY: EPIC RIDES💥

Expansive, wild adventures with lots of ups and downs

Spirit of the West by teen_dean (140K, @urne-buriall)

Summary: An 18y old Dean grew up on a horse farm – cue veterinarian Castiel. The summer of a lifetime ensues.

Why I love it: So this is one of my very favorite stories, ever ever, and I cannot recommand enough to immediatedly suscribe to the author’s Substack to be able to follow it in „real time“ next summer. It’s cinematic, rich, full of darkness and light, it’s everything a story can aspire to, I’m just. I just really love it.

Second Verse, Same as The First by LaLaCat1 (135K)

Summary: Endverse!Cas is sent back to the start of S1 and is determined to make things right this time round.

Why I love it: a desperate and badass Cas, unfridging everyone, a thrilling plot, moments of awesome for the entire cast, gripping action scenes, a romance for the ages… this is a genuinely amazing story.

back road, black road by eden22 (167K)

Summary: 18y old Sam gets kidnapped by Hell on his way to Stanford. Dean tries to deal.

Why I love it: So this one’s not Destiel-centric but does have wonderful Destiel moments. It’s also very heavy on the gore and the angst (NOT for the faint of stomach), but expertly crafted, fascinating and frankly it deserves more love. Held my breath for half the read and never knew where it’d take me.

Special mention: It's The End Of The World (As We Know It) by tiamatv (140K)

🤪CATEGORY: DESTIEL INSANITY🤪

Uproariously funny stories about the intricate rituals these two weirdos get up too.

Life Skills by ilovehowyouletmefall (26K)

Summary: Dean teaches a newly human Cas how to be „a real man“.

Why I love it: Dean coming to Big Self-Realizations while trying to have platonic threesomes with Cas is so perfect. Very endearing, tender and funny. Also, smoking hot sex.

the cheapest room in the house by biggaybenny (89K)

Summary: Dean downloads Grindr for Cas

Why I love it: Just. Late season Dean being deranged about Cas’ sexuality while everyone watches on in utter confusion. Equally hilarious and deeply moving

according to all known laws of life by @sobsicles (29k)

Summary: Cas comes back from the Empty to a Dean who won’t stop playing gay chicken.

Why I love it: They are both such petty, insane weirdos in this one. They said „can every situation be turned into a squabble“ and didn’t wait for an answer. So funny, so tender

Special mention: Wedding Vows and Negotiations by GingerFail (6K)

That's it, enjoy and leave your writers some much-deserved love!

#destiel #fanfic rec #supernatural #spn #spn fic #deancas #nov 5th #destiel fanfic #dean x castiel #my posts #long post #it was so hard to choose TT_TT #this fandom is amazing

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whatsk-poppinhomies · 10 months ago

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Pairing : Lee Felix x F!Reader TW : very angsty ; fluffy in the beginning just to break everyone's hearts a little bit more ; death of a family member ; famous nana cliffhanger ; Word Count : 5.2k Request : @lovesunshinefelix : Write more angst 😵‍💫 GIVE ME THE ANGST 😭🧎‍♀️ A/N : Of course! Anything for you bestie!! This one might be a little bit self indulgent just slightly, but it's definitely gonna be sad. I love making angsty Felix fics!

“One iced americano, please.”

“Okay, and what’s the name for the order?”

“Lee Felix.”

“Mmn… It should be done in just a moment.”

“Thank you.”

Such a short interaction, but that’s how it all began. You were simply the barista at the coffee shop next door to the office, but in a matter of seconds, you had become so much more to him. Your sweet smile and the fairy lights that twinkled in your eyes as you looked at him. He was absolutely enamored by you.

The craziest part was that he didn’t even like coffee that much, he had just been craving the taste of the drink. Is that why it felt all the more serious to him? Like it had been fate that brought him to you in the first place, but now it was you that kept bringing him back.

“One iced americano, please.”

“The name for the order?”

“It’s Lee Felix.”

“Alrighty, it should be done soon.”

“I’ll wait here.”

He wondered if you’d remember him if he came in every day. Would you remember his order or his name? Would you remember the way he’d smile at you whenever you spoke? Would you remember anything about him, or was he just another customer that you probably forgot about once the work day was done?

He wanted it to be like that, he wanted to be a customer that you looked forward to seeing. He wanted your head to lift with every ring of the bell when the shop door would open. He wanted you to wait for his appearance, to see you smile when he finally came in. He wanted you to recognize him.

“One iced-“

“Americano? Is it for a Lee Felix?”

“Hm… Maybe I should switch up my order?”

“It’s almost been two weeks, I can’t imagine having an iced americano every single day for that long.”

“Well, what would you recommend?”

“I’m not sure… I don’t really drink coffee.”

“That’s ironic. You don’t drink anything here?”

“Does the free water count?”

“I’ll take a free water then.”

It was the first time he had actually talked to you, but it was also the first time you had said his name in any way other than letting him know that his order was done, it was the first time that you had said his order without his having to really say anything at all. It was the proof that he needed to know that he was on the right track, he just had to keep going.

You had laughed that day too, not one of those fake laughs that he had heard you give the other guys that would try to flirt with you… It was a genuine laugh, the sound so beautiful that it was on a constant loop in his head for the rest of the day. He couldn’t get you off of his mind, but he didn’t want to rush things. Even if he felt that things were going perfectly, he wanted you to feel the same way.

“Two free waters and a croffle, please.”

“Really changing it up now, are we? Are you bringing a date?”

“Ah… Not exactly…”

“Good, because I don’t think a woman would be very impressed with free water for a drink.”

“But the woman doesn’t drink anything on the menu. I’m really going out on a limb here with the croffle.”

“You can never go wrong with a croffle, they’re delicious. Why would you invite this woman to the coffee shop if you know she doesn’t like anything on the menu though?”

“Because this is the only place I get to see her, and I’m too shy to ask her for her number, so I just wanted to see if she wanted to have some free water and share a croffle with me.”

“Oh… Is she here already?”

“I’m looking at her…”

He could remember vividly the way you froze, the way it felt when his stomach began its descent, thinking that you would turn him down. It took you so long to say anything, he wondered if he had completely blown it by being so forward. He had never been so nervous in his life, but then that smile appeared on your face and you let out the most beautiful laugh, the sound tinged with a certain shyness that he had never read from you before. Did he make you as shy as you made him?

Sitting across the table from you, he could feel it, you were meant for him and he was meant for you. He was a perfect mix of so many emotions, nervousness, shyness, happiness, he was everything balled up into one, but it made him feel alive. It was like he was standing on stage and performing for all of STAY, except there was no setlist, there was no particular script or order that he had to follow… And it was only your eyes on him… But it was just as amazing, if not more, because you were looking at him and only him, and you were there with just him. He was all yours, and you were all his.

///

“If you could have your wedding anywhere in the world, where would it be?” He asked as you both laid on the blanket beneath the cherry blossom trees that were in full bloom. It was beautiful, the perfect spot for a date, although most people would say that he didn’t have to try as hard now that it’s been 5 months since the two of you have been together. He didn’t believe them though, because every single time he took you somewhere new, somewhere more beautiful than the last, your eyes would light up and that adorable smile would stretch across your face, and he’d question why he would give that up.

You hummed in thought, and he wondered what your mind looked like right now. Were images of your dream wedding playing out behind your closed eyes? Was he the one standing across from you in those thoughts, dressed in a suit, tears in his eyes as he watched the woman of his dreams walk down the aisle to meet him at the end? “I think… Hmm… Well, I don’t really mind much, actually. As long as I’m there with the person that I love, that I want to spend the rest of my life with… The place doesn’t matter much at all.” How could you be so amazing? He asked himself that every single day. “What about you? Where would your dream wedding be?”

He hummed softly, rolling over onto his side and propping himself up on his elbow, staring down at you with the most loving eyes. He knew for a fact that he had never loved someone as much as he loves you, and it was only bound to get stronger. “I’m sure that a lot of people would think that I’d want to get married on the beach somewhere in Australia since that’s where I’m from… But I feel like the beach is rather cliche, it gets done too much.”

“I like the beach…” You murmured, tucking a strand of hair behind his ear, your fingers lingering against his cheek. “I think it would make for some beautiful pictures, don’t you?” He hadn’t exactly thought about it that way, but now that he heard your input, it was like his entire view had been changed.

“The beach it’ll be then.” He said quite enthusiastically, his cheeks still flushed from where you had touched him. You just had the ability to send fire coursing through his veins and he loved the feeling of it, the warmth that it brought.

You giggled softly, rolling your eyes at the sudden switch up. “What’s with the serious questions all of a sudden? Do you plan on getting married some time soon? You have to invite me to the wedding.” You joked, and he stuck his tongue out at you before dipping down and pressing his lips to yours.

“The only wedding I want is the one where you’re meeting me at the end of the aisle.” He said much softer now, even his breaths were so quiet it was almost like he wasn’t breathing at all. “We have time though… I just wanted a general idea of what you’d want.”

“Felix…” His name was like a breath from your lips, so gentle, so light that the winds that shook the blossoms off the trees would be able to pick it up and carry it away.

“It’s okay, you don’t have to think too hard about it just now. I’ll make sure everything is perfect for you when the day comes.”

“You’re crazy…” You murmured, and maybe he was. Maybe he was out of his damn mind to be planning a wedding with a girl that he had met at a coffee shop only five months ago. But to him it felt right, it felt like the only thing to do. He knew that all he wanted was you anyway, and he didn’t want to hide the way he felt for you. He wanted you to know that you were the only person he ever wanted in his life.

“Mm… Maybe… You smell like coffee beans…” He teased, nuzzling his nose into the crook of your neck and taking a deep breath. “Is that… French Roast? Maybe… with a hint of vanilla?”

You squealed, playfully pushing against his shoulders as you tried to squirm free. “Stop it! You’re the one who didn’t want to wait for me to go home and change when I got off!” You defended, but he thought it was so damn adorable.

“I just like to see you, I didn’t want to wait!” He jokingly whined, dropping on top of you completely, his face still hidden, his lips brushing against your skin as he spoke. “You smell amazing, absolutely delicious, my coffee queen.”

///

“Would you rather have your body and Bbokaris head, or the other way around?” You asked one night as you sat beside him on the couch. The question was most likely nothing more than a joke, but he wanted you to know that he listened to and thought about everything that you said, so he paused the movie that was playing on the tv and turned his body entirely toward you.

“Would you still love me regardless of what my answer is?” He quizzed, his eyes searching deeply into yours for the answer, and you nodded your head so firmly that he knew you weren’t lying. You’d love him no matter what, and he would love you just the same. “I think I’d rather have his head, I don’t want to be any shorter… Or… Am I just a regular sized version of Bbokari? Is he me sized or am I him sized?”

You snorted at the questions, your laughter still his most favorite sound in the entire world. He made a goal to make you laugh at least twice a day, if not more. “It would be the size of your skzoo plushy. It would be so cute though, wouldn’t it?! I could just carry you around with me everywhere I go! I’d never have to miss you!”

Even though you were still giggling, your words made his heart flutter. Did you miss him when he wasn’t around? Did your heart ache like his whenever there was distance between the two of you? He always tried not to be too clingy. “You never have to miss me now, just text me and I’ll come to you always.” He draped his arm over your shoulder, tugging you closer to his side as he pressed a small kiss to your temple.

“You have so much work to do, I don’t like bothering you. I would never call you away from practice or recording just to see you… Even if I want to.” You looked up at him, your smile pushing your cheeks up and squinting your eyes. Your eyes… He wanted to get lost in them for hours and hours, he wanted to live in them just for a moment, to see the world the way you do. What made you angry? What made you sad? He’s been with you for seven months now and he’s never seen you anything but happy. Was it because you were with him? Did he make all of your fears, your worries, your anger… Did he make it disappear?

“I think even if I had Bbokari body I’d be in practice… Can you imagine?” Your head fell back once more as your laughter filled the room, he never wanted to stop hearing it. “Wait… Would my head shrink too, or would my head stay normal sized? I have so many questions!”

You were laughing even harder now, wheezing even as you breathlessly tried to talk through fits of giggles. “Your normal head… Definitely… It would be so top heavy on the tiny body… Oh my gosh… Just picturing it… The Maniac move… With the…” You couldn’t even finish the sentence, bursting into a new fit of laughter, and now his mind was filled with the same image, and you both were laughing.

It was nice to have someone to just laugh with, to goof around with. He felt so normal with you, he could have fun, he could be truly happy when you were beside him. That’s why he couldn’t let you go, why he kept thinking to a time somewhere in the future where you and him would both be on the beach in Australia, surrounded by your families and your friends, and he’d slip a ring onto your finger and promise himself to you for the rest of forever.

///

“When was the last time I told you I loved you?” Felix asked over the phone, trying not to speak too loud. Sharing a hotel room wasn’t exactly hard, but he tried to be as respectful as possible to the guys who were trying to sleep while also trying to talk to you as much as he could. Time zones were always a pain in the ass, but they’re even worse now considering he couldn’t just not talk to you while he was away.

“About five seconds ago.” You whispered, although there was no need for you to, he had your voice coming through his headphone so none of the other guys would hear you. “It’s so early in the morning for you… Aren’t you tired? I don’t want to keep you up all night.”

“Mm… It’s worth it to talk to you.” He didn’t care if he was tired, he’d just sleep while getting his hair and makeup done, or he’d sleep in the car on the way to the next venue. “Have you eaten yet?” He quickly tried to change the subject, truthfully, he just wanted to hear you talk. He loved listening to you speak, he could lay in the hotel bed for hours with your sweet whispers filling his ears.

“Not yet… I’m trying to think of what to eat.” The sound of your kitchen cabinets squeaking was heard and he chuckled softly, making a mental note to try to fix them or at least put some oil on the hinges so they wouldn’t be as loud. “Think I might just have a ramen bowl. It’s not as fun to do the dishes when I don’t have my designated drier.”

Everything that the two of you did together was fun, it didn’t matter what it was. Whether you were going on dates or if it was something as mundane as doing the dishes or the laundry, if you were doing it together, that’s what made it enjoyable. “Well just let the dishes build up and we’ll have so much fun washing them together once I get back.” He teased, and he could just see the eye roll that came along with your soft snort as you tried to stifle your laughter.

“I don’t think my sink is big enough for that many dishes.” You said between giggles, but your laughter was short lived as you let out a quiet sigh. “I miss you… So much…” Your voice was quieter now, almost to the point that he couldn’t hear you, and the only reason he could is thanks to the headphones. “Bbokari doesn’t hug me back the way you do… The bed is so empty and cold on your side… And the clothes that you left me are starting to lose your scent.”

He couldn’t be more thankful that the two other guys in the room were already asleep because he could feel the tears pricking at his eyes as he listened to you. Felix missed you just as much, and he considered himself to be lucky because he wasn’t in a house that would feel so lonely if the roles were reversed. “I know, babe. I’ll be home soon, just wait for me. I miss you too… So much. I wish I could have snuck you here with me, I wish you would have packed yourself in my suitcase. We wouldn’t have to miss each other at all.”

Now you both were crying, and he got up out of the bed as quietly as he could to make his way to the bathroom just to make sure he didn’t wake anyone up with his sniffling. “I love you, Lix…” Hearing you say it, no matter how many times he heard it, it was always like the first time. His heart would flutter and he’d feel all warm and fuzzy inside, and while this time was no different, there was an extra feeling of sadness that came along with it.

“I love you too, babe… Don’t cry anymore, please? You’re too beautiful to cry… Smile for me, okay? And just always remember, I’m not gone forever, I’ll always come home to you.”

///

2 months later and he was finally heading back home to you. The night before the flight he had stayed up just to talk to you on the phone, it sounded like you were crying again, but he assumed that the tears you were shedding were tears of happiness that he’d finally be returning to you. He’d be lying if he tried to say that he hadn’t shed a few tears himself at the thought of finally being able to hold you and kiss you again.

He slept through the entire plane ride, and he hadn’t told you what time he’d be landing because he wanted to surprise you by showing up at your work. He wouldn’t say that he’s a hopeless romantic, but he couldn’t stop thinking about how romantic it would be to show up at your work with a bouquet of flowers. He could already see the shy little smile that would spread across your face, the flustered look in your eyes when you saw him walk through the door.

When the plane finally landed, his excitement really kicked in. He didn’t want to wait to take his things back to the dorms, he didn’t even care to change his clothes or check to see how he looked. All he could think about was you. So he had the guys take all of his bags back to the dorms and he asked to be taken straight to the little coffee shop right beside the office… after stopping by a flower shop first though.

“One iced americano, please.” His voice was cheerful as he practically waltzed through the door, the tiny bell above his head ringing out and announcing his entrance. The bouquet was hidden behind his back and he couldn’t help but smile wide as he looked around at the familiar scenery… They hadn’t changed anything in the months that he had been gone.

“She’s not here.” One of the employees said, and Felix didn’t know whether to feel disappointed, humiliated, or both. He was sure that you would be there, you always worked on the weekdays, and it’s not like you had said anything about having your schedule changed. Maybe he should have let you know that he was on his way to the shop just so that you could have let him know that you weren’t there.

“Oh… Well… Did her schedule change?” He asked rather sheepishly, and the girl behind the counter cocked her head to the side, her eyebrow raising. “What? Why are you looking at me like that? You didn’t fire her, did you?!”

“She didn’t tell you, did she?” The girl leaned across the counter, and there was a look in her eye that made it clear to him that she found some kind of enjoyment in this, but he didn’t know what the hell she was talking about. “She went home. And I’m not talking about down the street. I mean, she hopped on a plane and went home. She was in a rush too.”

The flowers fell to the floor, and he felt that he was going to be next if he didn’t keep himself steady against the counter. You… You didn’t even live in Korea… And you hadn’t told him that at all. He wouldn’t have even minded, as long as he knew that you’d always be his… But you just left. You left without saying anything to him. You left without warning, without reason. He didn’t even know what to do.

For a moment, the world froze, time seemed to stop entirely, his mind reeling with what he could do, what he should do. Was he supposed to call you? Would you even answer him? Were you trying to run away from him? Had he done something wrong? He just couldn’t understand what he had done to make you leave without a message, a call… You had given him nothing when he wanted to give you everything. It wasn’t fair. Was he too clingy? Why didn’t you just talk to him? He would have done anything to just keep you, he would have changed completely if it meant having you still.

“If you want to talk about it, I-“ The girl began, but he didn’t want to talk to anyone if it wasn’t you. She didn’t have the answers, she couldn’t tell him what he needed to know. He stormed out of the shop, taking a deep breath, the cold air catching in his throat and causing it to burn. He didn’t want to cry, but it seemed inevitable as the chill caught on the dampened streaks that coated his cheeks. Was there someone else? What was he to you that you could just give up so easily? How could you walk away without even a glance back, a second thought? He couldn’t let you do this, he just couldn’t. He was going to get an answer, whether you planned on giving it to him or not.

///

“Tell me more about your time in Korea. Tell me about that boy you met.” Your grandmother said hoarsely, her frail hand reaching out to grab yours. “You smile when you talk about him. I like seeing you smile.”

“Gran… You really need to rest now.” You whispered, holding her hand in both of yours to try to warm it up. She always felt so cold now. “I’ll tell you all about it, I’ll tell you all about him when you wake up. I’ll be here.” Your thumb brushed along her knuckles, her skin wrinkled and thin, but to hold her hand was such a comforting thing, to be there beside her.

She didn’t argue, she simply settled against her pillow, using her free hand to pull up her blanket a little higher as she kept her other hand between yours. She was weak, she was sick, and when you had gotten the call from your father that she was being moved from the hospital and being put into hospice, there was nothing that would keep you from being by her side.

It was late, 11 o’clock at night, a little past that even, and everyone had gone to bed in their respective guest rooms. Everyone but you, still jet lagged and running on Korean time. You were wide awake, and you knew that a part of you refused to fall asleep just so that you’d have a little more time with your grandmother, even if it was just sitting beside her while she was sleeping. It might be all the time you have left with her, and a part of you felt guilty for being gone the past year, before she got really sick, before things came to this. You knew that she would have wanted you to live your life though, to find happiness, to find someone that you loved, someone who loved you back just as much. And you had found that, you had found all of those things in Felix, and you felt terrible for leaving the way you did, but you were in such a hurry, you were hoping he’d understand.

11:56pm, four minutes to midnight and your phone rang on the nightstand table beside your grandmother’s bed. Felixs name was at the top of the screen and you quickly answered it, taking one last look at your grandmother before leaving the room to stand in the hallway, not wanting to risk waking her up while talking to him. “Lix…” You sighed out his name, and there was a sense of relief being kept at bay long enough for you to hear his voice, and you knew that once you did, you’d feel slightly better.

“You left.” He began, and that relief never set in, instead there was just dread and more guilt stacked on top of the already existing emotion. “An entire year, and I didn’t even hear it from you, I heard it from one of your coworkers that you don’t even live here… And the worst part is that I didn’t even hear about it until you were already gone.”

“I know that you’re angry, you have every right to be… But can you just listen to me, please?” You begged as quietly as you could, leaning against the wall in the hallway and slowly sinking to the floor.

“I do have the right to be angry, and I won’t listen. You had almost 365 days for me to sit and listen to you so that maybe I’d understand what you did… But not now. It’s too late for explanations and I don’t want to hear your excuses either.”

He sounded so angry, you had never heard him get mad before, and while you would have gotten angry right back, you were too busy being devastated. You needed him, you needed him more than anything right now, but he wasn’t even listening to you. On top of being sad, you were confused, you did live in Korea, just because you weren’t originally from there didn’t mean that you weren’t living there. “Why did you call… If you’re just going to yell at me and not listen to what I have to say… Why would you call me?”

“You basically walked out on me… No… You did worse… You left the damn country. You’ve broken me, I can’t believe you’re the one even crying right now.” You clasped your hand over your mouth to try to muffle the sound of your sobs just so he wouldn’t point them out. “You know what… I don’t have anything else to say to you. I hope you enjoyed your year, you can go tell everyone about how you broke my heart, I’m sure you’ll be real popular for that. Bye.” You didn’t know what the hell he was on about, you didn’t know where the assumptions even came from, but they only managed to hurt worse.

You were left in silence, your heart in shambles as you sat in the dark hallway, the only light coming from the cracked bathroom door at the end of the hall. You were shrouded in sadness, you had just lost the love of your life, the man that you planned on spending the rest of your life with, and you were about to lose your grandmother. Was there anything else that life would throw at you?

///

It had been a week since the phone call, and while he had been angry then, the anger had slowly worn off and turned into a sadness spurred by the loneliness that he felt without you there. Hell, he would have been fine just talking to you on the phone, hearing your voice or seeing you through a video call. There was too much shame though, too much regret. He had lost his temper with you, and while the call had initially been to figure out why you had left, he hadn’t even let you talk long enough to tell him.

He tried to not let it bother him, he tried to focus his mind on anything else, but whenever he’d go to the office, he’d have to go past the little coffee shop and it was a constant reminder of you, of when things had first begun. He felt like a fool, an absolute idiot, and now he didn’t even know how you were doing. He still loved you, and he wanted nothing more than to tell you those three words and hear them back, but now he was too scared to even try to contact you.

So he watched your social accounts, waiting to see an update of any kind. You hadn’t blocked him, which was either a good sign, or a sign that you hadn’t been online in a while and he didn’t know how to feel about that thought. The last post you had made was from a week before he had left for tour, a picture of the two of you sitting at your table in the coffee shop, sharing a croffle with your free waters, a perfect recreation of your first date.

His notifications were on for whenever you did post, just so that he could be the first person to like the picture or an update, but it had been so long since you posted that he rarely even checked the notifications to see if it was you. Today had been a rare occurrence where he had already been looking at his phone when you did post, and while it was only an instagram story update, he immediately clicked on it.

“I’ll miss you Gran… I love you so much.” The text read under a picture of an older woman, her eyes wrinkled in the corners, a sign that she smiled a lot, and her smile was just like yours, he could see it in the picture. She was a happy woman, he could tell that she was loved, and that she had loved just as much. As he looked at the picture longer though, it set in, the realization… You hadn’t left him, not because you wanted to… You had to go home, you had to be there for her, for your family… And he had gotten angry with you for that… He hadn’t even let you explain.

“Oh… Fuck!” He hissed, quickly closing out of instagram and opening his phone, his thumb hovering over your contact. He wasn’t sure how he’d go about apologizing, he didn’t know how the phone call would go even if you did answer, but he had to try. He had to at least say sorry if nothing else, so he called you, and he waited for it to go to voicemail, but then he heard silence… and then a shaky breath… You were crying. “Y/N… Babe… Are you there?”

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little-cereal-draws · 6 months ago

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Nobody AU

I had the most delicious angsty au idea to torture poor Ody even more >:)

Basically everything's the same as the odyssey: he gets lost, fights a bunch of gods and monsters, and kills the suitors. But now comes the twist! Some god (Poseidon? Idk, it doesn’t matter) cursed him so as soon as he reunites with his wife, he forgets everything. Penelope gives him the riddle about their bed, he answers it, she’s like “You are Odysseus!” and then boom! He forgets everything.

He doesn’t remember his house, his kingdom, his friends, his family, his name. He doesn’t recognize anything. His family is heartbroken because they just got him back and now he’s gone again but there’s not much they can do. Athena tells them to try to jog his memory but she can’t guarantee that it’ll work.

He doesn’t remember Telemachus at all because he doesn’t look like an adult in all the memories he had of his son; he’s trying to find a baby. He vaguely remembers Penelope; how much he remembers fluctuates from day to day. He thinks she’s very pretty but doesn’t believe that he’s her husband. He insists on sleeping in a different room and avoids her during the day.

He starts actually going by Nobody because it’s all he can think of when people ask his name. Eventually, he starts letting Penelope hold his hands and caress his face. Letting himself be loved a little bit. He still doesn’t believe they’re married but he’ll let himself have this. It feels so good but makes him cry with longing like he’s missing something that’s right in front of him but he doesn't know why.

I don't think he ever gets his full memory back but he does eventually let himself be a part of their family, even if he doesn't remember everything they claim happened. He dies somewhat happy; he's glad that he had them with him but still feels like he's missing something important, something that could've made him happier.

This was inspired by the song Mr. Forgettable if you want to feel even sadder :)

#why am i making aus for the odyssey lol #the odyssey #greek mythology #epic the musical #odysseus #penelope #telemachus #epic the musical au #the odyssey au

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milliesfishes · 8 months ago

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౨ৎ꣑ৎSweet Girl౨ৎ꣑ৎ

[fem reader] contains: pregnancy, stillbirth, mentions of weight gain, problems during pregnancy, reader is mentioned as being petite. pairing: billy the kid x fem reader summary: you want a baby, but billy's hesitant. author’s note: this one's angsty and I'm unsure if it's good, but I wanted to put it out there in case anyone likes it :) Pinterest Board Spotify Playlist

An outlaw’s life kept Billy away from home often, for long, long days until he’d come home to you all tired and missing you so bad it drove him insane. You’d be swaddled in his sheets, wearing one of his shirts and nothing else, your hair spread across the pillow as you slept, the covers in your fist clenched to your chest.

This was the sight that greeted him on a Friday night that wasn’t particularly special for any reason, but seeing you this way made it perfect instantly. His girl, his pretty girl fast asleep in his bed, looking so deliciously his.

Billy pulled off his work clothes, replacing them with his pajamas. He pulled back the covers just slightly on the side you were sleeping, his side, nudging you over like he did every night. He slid an arm under your side and held you close, pressing a light kiss to your shoulder.

You stirred, humming as you woke, and he breathed out softly, half annoyed he’d woken you and half happy for the same reason. “You awake baby? ‘M sorry,” he murmured, his big hands creeping under the hem of his shirt you were wearing so he could splay his fingers out over your skin.

“You’re back.” You turned in his arms, smiling sleepily and opening your eyes.

“Go back to sleep baby.” His lips landed on your forehead, holding them there for a moment.

Shaking your head, you said, “Uh uh, I wanted to wait up for you. I fell asleep though.”

Billy couldn’t help his smile, and he brushed his thumb back and forth across your cheek. “My girl waitin’ up f’ me? How’d I get so lucky?”

“I missed you today,” you said, tilting your head up toward him. “Missed you lots.”

“Me too baby, me too,” he said, nudging another kiss onto your forehead. “I was wantin’ to come home all day, just leave the boys behind and come hold my pretty girl.”

Giggling, you looked up into his eyes. “I’m lucky you spoil me at the end of every day or else I’d be a real unhappy girl.”

He took you in, all cozy nestled against his cotton sheets that you made look like satin, settled against his covers. “‘Course I spoil my sweet baby, who wouldn’t?” Billy pulled your chin up, pressing a little kiss to your lips, nibbling gently on your bottom lip before pulling away. You pushed the blankets back so you could cuddle him closer, and he sighed. “Look atcha’, so damn cute in my shirt.”

“I like wearing them,” you murmured. “Especially when you’re gone.”

“Ya miss me that much, huh baby?” Billy smiled.

“Miss you, miss your kisses.” You smiled as he pressed his lips anywhere on your face he could reach, his stubble rubbing against your skin. “Even if they’re all scratchy.”

“Don’t like a little scruff?” he ran his fingers over his chin, feeling it. “Guess I could use a shave…”

“No don’t,” You put your hands on his cheeks, feeling it. “I love it.”

He smirked and pressed more kisses to your cheeks, stubble prickling your soft skin. “Knew ya liked a man’s kiss, yeah sweetheart? All rough on your pretty face?”

You giggled as he caught your lips again, kissing him back softly. “They feel nice.”

“Ahhh I missed this today,” Billy murmured, shifting you in his arms so your back was against his chest. He pressed his cheek to yours, leaning his head on you. “Snugglin’ ya, kissin’ ya…” One of his hands came up to your collarbone, tracing shapes there. “Lovin’ on ya…”

“You spoil me,” you repeated, feeling like a princess all cuddled into his arms.

“Hmm, I dunno,” he rested his chin on top of your head for a second, looking down at you, eyes roving over the way his shirt had ridden up your thighs. “Pretty woman…in my bed…yeah I’m spoiled too.”

You nuzzled yourself against him. “I’m just loving on you, like you’re doing.”

“Are you lovin’ on me or lovin’ me on you?” he teased, and you squealed lightly, burying your face in his chest, much to his delight.

“C’mon baby,” he cooed at you. “Lemme see that pretty face again. Please? Wanna get a better look at my girl.”

“You look at me all the time,” you said against his chest, and he chuckled.

“Doesn’t matter. Lemme look at ya all nice ‘n slow ‘kay?” He tilted your head up, and you reluctantly looked at him

“Atta girl,” he breathed, looking over you. “There’s my girl…there’s my baby. Won’t ya turn a little?”

You moved away from him, settling on your side so he could look at you fully as he requested. You gave him a look of mock annoyance after a few seconds. “Done yet? I wanna cuddle.”

He grinned. “C’mon…I have ya in my bed and that’s all I get?” Billy stretched his arms back out for you. “Why don’t you c’mere and gimme a kiss?”

You snuggled back up to him happily, pressing a light dutiful kiss to his nose. He chuckled. “Not that kinda kiss, honey. Gimme a real one now, like a good girl.”

Rolling your eyes playfully, you leaned in, hovering your lips over his. He smiled, hands going to your hips and pulling you closer. “Quit teasing me, you…” Billy laughed and brought his lips to yours, kissing you softly, lingeringly. You kissed him back with equal fervor.

“Better?” you asked, pulling back a little.

“Much better darlin’, much better,” Billy brought his hands around, hugging you to him, with a playful grip on your bottom.

“Mm!” you moved his hands away from there, snuggling back into him.

“Aw c’mon baby,” he grazed his lips over your hairline, his hands moving back. “Just tryna love on my pretty girl reaall good…”

You couldn’t help your smile, and you shook your head, too comfortable in the cradle of his arms to care anymore. “You keep me too cozy to really complain if you get a little handsy.”

Billy laughed, holding her close. “What can I say? I gotta pretty little thing all snug in my bed…’s hard not to be.”

Smiling contentedly, you pressed your face into his chest. “I love you,” you murmured, smiling softly. “This is everything I’ve dreamed of.”

“Bein’ in an outlaw’s bed is everything ya dreamed of?” Billy smirked lovingly.

“I have a handsome man who loved me enough to marry me,” you corrected. “And I love him back.”

“I’m terribly grateful to love ya too, baby,” Billy kissed the top of your head. “Never thought I’d have me a wife but the one I found…oh boy is she a treasure.”

You smiled softly, looking at his hands as they shifted at your midsection, over your stomach. As your thoughts wandered, images of rounded bellies and babies with rosy cheeks and Billy’s blue eyes danced in front of your eyes. It was a vision that had haunted you for months now.

“Whatcha thinkin’ about?” your husband murmured, lips nudging against your neck. “Ya look happy darlin’.”

“Having babies,” you said dreamily, looking up at him.

Billy smiled. “Havin’ babies, huh? My little one havin’ another little thing?”

“Mhmm,” you murmured, playing with his hand on your tummy.

“Ya wanna make babies with me,” he whispered against your temple. “Hmm…we could y’know. Maybe not right now, but soon.”

You frowned adorably, a little panic rising inside you. “Not right now?”

Billy shook his head, brushing a strand of hair away from your face. “We wanna wait…wait ‘till you’re a little bit bigger sweet thing. Then we’ll put a baby in your belly.”

“Bigger?” your cute frown grew deeper. What did that have to do with anything?

“You’re just so little, darlin’,” he said, brushing a hand over your face. “Don’t want the baby to hurt ya. But once ya get a little bigger, then we can put a baby riiight here…” he rubbed your tummy. “Cause you’re gonna be a good little mama…”

“But I want your baby now,” you pouted, and he chuckled.

“I know sweetheart, I know. But we gotta wait so it won’t hurt ya.” He smirked. “And then after that, we’re gonna put lots and lots of babies in your belly…” Billy kissed her cheeks teasingly. “Over ‘n over…”

You giggled, shifting comfortably on his bed, looking cozy and sweet wrapped in his arms. He held you close, like a teddy bear. “You’re gonna be real good at makin’ babies…real good…”

“I wanna make babies now,” you reached up, kissing his cheek.

“My girl wants to play house with me, huh?” Billy ran his fingers through your hair. “You wanna baby ‘n everything.”

“I want a baby that looks just like you,” you studied his features, smiling sweetly.

“Do ya?” Billy pondered this for a minute, one hand squeezing your hip. “Well the baby’s comin’ outta you, ain’t it? So it’s gonna be pretty ‘n cute like you.”

“Uh uh, I want it to look like you,” you insisted, wrapping your arms around his neck.

“Gonna be a cute little thing either way, all my genes comin’ outta you,” Billy pressed kisses to your temple. “Can’t wait for you to have a belly fulla’ my baby.”

“So give me a baby now,” you whined as he kissed across your face gently.

“We gotta wait, little one,” he squeezed you against him. “If I make a baby in ya too soon it’ll hurt ya. I heard too many things about little women like you havin’ problems, baby.”

“It won’t hurt me,” you said earnestly. “I’m…I’m scared what’ll happen if we wait. What’ll happen if we don’t do it right now.”

Billy frowned, holding your head against his chest. You’d never told him anything like this before. “What’re ya scared of sweet girl?”

“My mama…” you started, your voice growing soft. “My mama had trouble getting a baby in her belly. And she waited too long and she died having me.”

The reason you wanted to do it now washed over him, and he held you a little tighter. “Oh baby,” he mumbled. “Just cause it happened to your mama don’t mean it’ll happen to you.”

“I don’t wanna risk it,” you said softly. “I want to give you a baby more than anything in the whole world. And we might lose our chance.”

“Your body’s not ready yet, my love,” Billy said softly. “Just a few more pounds and a little patience is all I ask.” He was being sweet, and you were grateful for that. But your want to give him a baby triumphed that.

“That could take years to make it stick,” you sat up in bed, looking down at him. He sat up with you, looking concerned. You were making a compelling argument.

“Baby…” he was close to being swayed. He wanted to give you whatever you wanted, after all. “The baby might have trouble comin’ outta ya…” he stroked the side of your face. “You’re just so little…”

“It’s a risk I’m willing to take,” you moved closer to him, looking into his eyes earnestly. Now Billy could see that this was more than just talking and teasing about having babies. You wanted this, you’d wanted this a long time.

His other hand came up to your face, and you moved into his lap, straddling him. “Please Billy,” you pleaded quietly. “Please…” You took his face in your hands and kissed each cheek. “I want to give you a baby. I don’t care what it takes.”

Your earnesty moved him, and his hands came to your thighs, holding you there. You were determined, brave and reckless to want his baby this badly. So he would give in. You were his girl, his angel, and you always got what you wanted.

“Damn it sweet girl,” he murmured, kissing you softly. You wrapped yourself around him, and he held you by the hips, his lips traveling down your neck and fixing themselves to your collarbone, breathing in your sweet scent.

The two of you made love twice that night, and continued to do it every morning and evening after that. About two months or so into your endeavors, you eagerly awaited to see if your monthly would come, hoping and praying it wouldn’t. Billy hurried home every day for a week to see if you’d gotten it or not, both of your excitement growing every day you didn’t.

Until one day when he came home to you in tears, sitting on the floor of the bedroom. Immediately he rushed over, taking you in his arms. “What’s the matter darlin’?”

“I got it today,” you sniffled, as you burrowed into him, shifting uncomfortably, feeling the rag you’d stuffed into your panties soak with your womanly blood.

“Oh, baby,” Billy murmured, kissing the top of your head. “’m sorry, sweetie.”

A full two months of lovemaking turned out to be fruitless…no baby yet in your little belly.

“We’ll try ‘gain next month, sweetheart,” he promised, cradling you in his arms. “It’ll happen, just gotta be patient.”

But it didn’t happen the next month. Or the month after that. It began to take a toll on the both of them, the waiting and disappointment. You tried not to get discouraged, but it was so hard. Billy was an angel, always holding you as you cried, promising it’d happen soon, the two of you just had to wait.

One time after you’d made love for the night, Billy came back from the washroom to find you with your back on the mattress, feet propped up against the wall. He couldn’t help his laugh. “Baby…whatcha doin’?”

“Making it take in me,” you responded, tapping your heels against the wall as if that’d make his spend glue to your insides.

“Oh really?” Billy sat on the bed with you, resting his chin on your tummy. “I dunno darlin’, that don’t seem right.”

You shushed him. “It’s gonna work.”

He pressed a gentle kiss to your tummy. “Darlin’.” Another kiss. “That ain’t gonna do a thing for gettin’ a baby in ya.”

“Just lemme try,” you insisted.

Billy chuckled, shaking his head at his girl’s antics. “Alright, alright.” Another kiss to your tummy. “You give it your best shot.”

When you continued to do it every night after that, Billy would always smile and give you a kiss, lying down beside you and putting his hand over your tummy, willing a baby to grow.

But your efforts continued to wield no results.

Until one day, when you heard the familiar sound of Billy’s boots against the wooden floor, and you sprang up, running out to him and jumping into his arms, legs around his waist, arms around his neck.

“Woah there!” Billy stumbled backwards, catching you easily even though you surprised him. “Easy, easy girl. Where’s the fire?”

You said nothing, just took one of his hands off you and pressed it to your tummy, your smile radiant. His eyes widened, fingers spreading out over your midsection. “Baby…?”

Pressing yourself close to him, your face buried in his neck, you murmured, “You’re gonna be a daddy.”

He laughed joyfully and spun you around once, grabbing your jaw between his fingers and kissing you softly, sweetly. “I’m gonna be a daddy.”

You hugged him tightly, and he nosed little kisses into your hair, tucking you into him and marveling at his girl, his beautiful girl carrying his child.

As the weeks passed and your belly grew, Billy grew more clingy toward you, which you hadn’t even thought was possible. He’d come home at earlier times from riding with the gang, claiming “They can survive without me, they know my girl’s growin’ our baby at home.”

Your figure, although remaining petite, filled out a little as your body made accommodations for the little life inside you, and Billy loved it. Your breasts were bigger, your waist curvier. You were nearly goddess-like in his opinion. You, on the other hand, grew more insecure as your body changed.

“I’ve gained so much weight,” you pouted as you stood at the mirror, smoothing your dress over your belly.

Billy came over, wrapping his arms around your waist from behind, holding your baby-filled tummy. “Whatcha mean, darlin’?”

“Look at me,” you sighed frustratedly, hands coming up to your chest. “My breasts are bigger now.”

“Mm, don’t I know it,” he murmured, pressing little kisses along your shoulder and up your neck.

“Billy,” you pouted, trying to be serious. “They’re so heavy now. Hurts.”

“Ohhh my poor baby,” he said against your neck, pulling you backwards to sit on the bed, on his lap. You folded your arms over yourself, frowning adorably. “If it helps, I think you’re beautiful right now.”

You smiled just slightly, but he noticed, keeping his arms around you and whispering sweet things into your skin. “Just knew you’d be pretty as a peach carryin’ my child.”

A little laugh escaped you at that, and you leaned back into him briefly, before sitting up again. “I can’t sit on your lap, I’m too heavy now.”

Billy gave you a look, tugging you back so you were fully against him. “Baby…you got nothin’ to worry about, yeah? You’re still a cute little thing.”

“I’ve gained so much weight,” you whined, shifting in his lap.

“Well…” Billy trailed off, looking at you, his hands moving over your belly. “Cuteness adds a couple pounds I s’pose.” He kissed your cheek and with his lips still against you, said, “Your body’s growin’ a baby, honey. It’s bound to happen.”

“I just wanna be pretty for you still,” you turned sideways in his lap to look at him.

Billy chuckled, his hand on the side of your face, thumb running over your cheekbone. “That ain’t nothin’ to worry about little one. You’re prettier now ‘n the day I met you, swear on m’ life.”

That coaxed a real smile out of you, and you nuzzled against him, content with how sweet he was being to you.

Unfortunately, the little weight you’d gained seemed to be the last of it.

As you got closer to delivery, your body began to change more, and not for the better. You started to lose weight, and your skin grew pale. Every day you became weaker, and it worried Billy beyond belief.

But despite all this, you were happy. You were always smiling for him, always commenting on how the baby was doing, whether it was kicking or not. He played along with you, pretending that you weren’t getting worse because he knew it’d upset you if he commented on it.

As you got into your eighth month, you were practically bedridden, weaker than Billy had ever seen you. He fretted lightly, not wanting to worry you too much, but the concern was building up inside him.

On a rainy evening, you were resting beside him, his head by your chest, close to your belly. One of your hands was resting there, the other in his hair, playing with it a little. You’d been having cramps all day, which you’d been told were common in the last little bit, so Billy had insisted you rest. He was silent, nuzzled into your side. You looked down at him. “You alright?”

Billy breathed in softly, sitting up and moving so that he was against the headboard, gently nudging you so your body was nestled against his. He looked down at you, face serious. “I’m worried about you.”

Your brow furrowed, and you tilted your head to look at him. “Why?”

“Why?” Billy asked in disbelief. “Baby. Look atcha. You’re losing weight, you’re so weak…”

“I’m fine,” you insisted, trying to sit up, but your belly made it hard.

“You’re not though,” he rubbed his thumb over your shoulder. “You’re so pale…’n weak…” Billy trailed off, looking pained. He shook his head as he looked at you, his eyes sad. “My girl…my beautiful girl…” he mumbled, his fear growing by the minute. “You’re not okay at all.”

“I’m happy,” you said softly, touching his hand and squeezing it. “I’m so happy. I’ve got your baby inside me and that’s all I ever wanted.”

“But you’re not well sweetheart,” he murmured. Billy pressed his lips to your hair, his hand running up and down your arm. “Baby’s takin’ a lot outta you, ain’t she?”

“Don’t blame her,” you whispered, your eyes wide, hand resting protectively over your swollen belly.

“I ain’t blaming her honey,” he murmured, shaking his head, his hand coming to cover yours. “She’s a baby, she’s doin’ what babies do and she’s takin’ everything she needs to grow…but that still means you’re sufferin’ for it.” Billy brought a hand to her face, thumb running down her cheek. “She’s takin’ too much outta ya.”

“Billy it’s fine,” you tried to insist, shifting so you could sit up a little.

“Stay down sweetheart,” he murmured, keeping his hand over hers. “And no, it ain’t fine. My girl…my girl’s fadin’ away…” He looked emotional, looking down and squeezing your hand.

“I’m not going anywhere,” you squeezed his hand back. “It’s just…this is just what happens in the last months.”

“Not like this,” Billy murmured, shaking his head and bringing his hand to your face, his thumb running over your cheek, eyes searching yours as if he were going to lose you. “Even I know this ain’t regular…”

“No, I have to be fine,” you insisted, looking at him. “I have to be fine for the other babies we have.”

“Other babies?” Billy frowned, thumb still brushing the side of your face. “Sweetheart, ya can’t honestly be thinkin’ about other babies?”

“Why not?” you asked, eyes growing wide as you tried to make out if he was serious.

His other hand came to your other cheek, and he held your face between his hands, looking earnest. “My love…at this rate, the way things are goin’...we’re not gonna be havin’ any more babies.” He was reluctant to tell her, she could tell.

Your face dropped, and your hand fell into your lap, out of his. “You can’t mean that.”

“Sweetheart,” he started, picking your hand up again. “Look at yourself. Look how weak ya are…how thin…we can’t have you gettin’ worse with each baby. This…” Billy took a deep breath. “This is the last one.”

Your heart beat faster at his words, and you looked down, shaking your head. “No, no.”

“No more babies after this one,” he said softly, lifting your chin with his hand. “I can’t let this happen again, gotta protect you. Shouldn’t have gotten ya pregnant so early anyways.”

Eyes filling with tears, you sniffled. “I wanted you to get me pregnant, I-”

“I know,” he murmured, thumb over your cheek once again. “I know. But I should have known better, should have known your body wasn’t ready.”

“That’s not for you to decide,” you whispered.

“It’s for me to know,” he said, his eyes intense but loving as he looked into yours. “And I should have known.”

“Don’t-” you cut yourself off as a cramp overtook you, pain shooting through your body. You closed your eyes, trying to breathe and smoothing your hand over your belly.

Billy was alert immediately, looking at you worriedly. “Sweetheart? What’s the matter?”

You gritted your teeth, the pain subsiding slightly and then coming back. This felt different from the cramps, it felt…

“Billy, you gotta get the midwife,” you got out, trying to breathe. “Something’s wrong…something’s-”

A new wave of hurt cut you off again and a little noise wrenched itself from your throat.

“Baby-”

“Please, go!” you said urgently, hands over your belly as your body was wracked with pain.

Billy didn’t waste any time, getting up and looking for his boots. He tugged them on, finding his hat and then coming back to you, taking your face in his hands. “You gotta breathe for me angel, yeah?” He kissed your forehead softly, then your nose, giving you a little smile, trying to reassure you, even though he looked concerned. “I’ll be back real soon, promise. Everything’s gonna be alright.” He pressed one more kiss to the top of your head and then he was gone, leaving you to suffer alone.

You didn’t know how much time passed, the pain being your only way of measuring it. It was searing, a biting flower blooming from your core. Praying endlessly that the baby was okay, your body twisted on the bed, trying to find relief from the limitless agony.

Finally, you heard footsteps, and then Billy was in the doorway like a saint after a storm. You cried from relief, and he hurried to you, sitting beside you and brushing hair off your sweaty face, promising it was going to be okay.

The midwife, younger than you’d expected but a source of comfort nonetheless, got to work immediately, pushing your nightdress up and examining you. She looked up after a moment. “How far along?”

“Eight months,” you managed, another bolt of pain hitting you. Billy let you squeeze his hand as hard as you wanted, not wincing once.

After a little more inspection, the midwife nodded, looking at Billy, then you again. She carefully moved your legs so they were bent and spread. “Alright sweet girl, brace yourself. This baby’s comin’ out real soon.”

You whimpered, and Billy squeezed your hand. “You’re gonna be okay, sweetheart. Promise, alright. ‘M right here.”

The labor was long, and you suffered through it, pushing the best you could. But your body only grew weaker as time went on, and you knew it wasn’t working, what you were doing. Everything was blurred- every one of your senses except the pain.

You heard the midwife say something to Billy, and he nodded, squeezing your hand once before letting go. Immediately, you made a noise of protest, reaching for him.

He tried to soothe you as he sat up on the bed with you, his thumb running over your cheek comfortingly. “‘M not going anywhere baby, just movin’ so we can make things easier for ya.” Billy eased his arm under you, gently lifting you to sit up. You whimpered at how uncomfortable it was, but he kissed your temple. “I know, I know. But this is gonna make it better. Baby’s gonna come out easier like this.” He positioned himself so you were between his legs, leaning back against his chest.

In this new position, your body’s instincts took over, working to get the baby out of you. Billy’s arms were wrapped around your collarbone, careful not to touch your belly, and one of your hands gripped around him, the other holding his forearm.

“C’mon sweetheart, you can do it,” he murmured against your skin. Your body was tired, making it harder and harder to push the baby out, but you tried, knowing you had no choice.

“Is she comin’ out? Can you see her?” you gasped, chest heaving as you tried pushing again.

“Almost baby, almost,” he muttered like a mantra. “You’re so close.”

And then suddenly it was over. You felt the pain lift just a little, and then you knew the baby was out. Weakened from exhaustion, you collapsed against Billy, who held you close, carefully, kissing your head and whispering things to you. “You did it sweetheart, ’s all over, you’re alright. You’re alright.”

You were too tired to respond, closing your eyes briefly and trying to forget the pain of the last hours. When Billy’s body stiffened, you didn’t notice, face buried in him as you tried to recover.

Then you remembered your baby, and you tried to sit up, using him as support. “Billy…I wanna hold her.”

His voice was so quiet it was almost far away. “Just stay here sweetheart, rest a little while.”

“No, I wanna see her,” you tried again, but he pushed your face into his shoulder.

“No baby, y’ don’t wanna see.” His voice had a protective edge to it, but you stubbornly pushed his hand away, turning to see the baby in the midwife’s arms.

She was perfect, so little…so pale. Not moving.

Your heart dropped, and your lips parted slightly as you realized what had happened. Billy was gently trying to get you to rest against him again, but you refused, unable to tear your eyes away.

The midwife’s face was somber, and she handed the baby over to Billy, who held her with one arm. “Hold her for a bit…I’m so sorry.” She left the room.

Billy held her gently, keeping his other arm around you. He looked from the baby’s face to yours, looking panicked. “Sweetheart, I-”

You shook your head, reaching out and touching your daughter’s face gently, tracing a hand down her cheek. The silence in the room was palpable.

“She’s so beautiful,” you finally whispered, gaze drawn to her like a magnet.

“She is,” Billy said softly, and you could hear the tears in his voice.

Staring down at your lifeless baby girl, you took her from Billy, holding her close, the dark curtain of mourning shutting around you. You imagined the life she could have had, how much you would have loved her, how much you did love her.

Finally, you kissed her tiny forehead, whispering, “I’m sorry sweetheart.” Then, seeing the midwife re-enter the room, you relinquished your daughter to be taken to the grave.

Billy watched all this with silent tears running down his cheeks, but you paid him no mind until the midwife had taken your daughter away, and that was when you broke.

You turned into him, fresh tears falling fast, and he sheltered you in his arms, his nose buried in your hair. “She…she…”

“I know,” he murmured tearfully. “I know.”

The two of you were back where you started, holding each other tightly, but this time shrouded in grief.

come talk about billy here!

#billy the kid #billy the kid x reader #billy the kid x you #william h bonney #billy the kid 2022 #william h bonney x reader #william h bonney fanfiction #william h bonney x you #milliesfishes #milliesfishes billy #Spotify #billy the kid fanfiction

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itsclydebitches · 1 year ago

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The narrative H/C potential of switching Cazador and Orin’s kidnappings is just delicious to me. Instead of Astarion’s siblings waking him up and giving the party the chance to defend him, the player arrives back at camp (or finishes a long rest if Astarion is currently in your party) to discover that he’s just gone. No note, no sign of a struggle, nothing. Insert any hand wave-y means of abducting Astarion quietly here. The point is that this would wreck him.

Not just because he’s now back in the clutches of Cazador (though that’s obvious), but because you’re not coming for him. See, having Orin as your kidnapper is actually one of the more reassuring options, despite her murder-happy disposition. Even if she nabs a struggling character like Gale who might believe they’re unworthy of rescue for any number of reasons, Orin is one of the few baddies you simply have to engage with. Significantly, knowledge of that necessity is baked into the actual story-world. We see fighting her as a gameplay mechanic—defeat three mini bosses to reach the final boss—but that structure still exists as a Save The World quest for your party. No stone, no victory. No Orin, no stone. Ergo, they’re fighting Orin. So whoever is kidnapped knows that the party will show up eventually, even if it’s not for them. That’s it’s own wonderful, angsty assumption—“You came because it was the right thing to do, not because you care about me. My rescue was always a byproduct of saving the people who truly deserve it”—but at least there’s still reassurance in knowing you’ll see them again. All the kidnapped member has to do is not piss off Orin in the meantime and hope the party doesn’t die along the way. Not stellar odds, admittedly, but are they really any worse than what they’ve been dealing with all along?

Getting kidnapped by Cazador on the other hand... oh boy. He’s a missable boss, both mechanically and narratively. Who’s worried about him when there’s a fucking Netherbrain threatening all of Faerûn? Sure, sure, your Tav might have spent their journey helping every idiot with suitably convincing puppy-dog eyes, but Astarion is very much not a refugee tiefling/snake-threatened child/shadow-cursed hero/etc. He’s a chaotic, caustic bitch whose trauma is expressed more through biting fury than soft bouts of crying. Not only is he (in his own mind) not the sort of person people go out of their way to save, but would you even know where to begin? Depending on your approval rating you might still be iffy about Astarion’s past, as well as this upcoming ritual. Has Tav met any of the siblings yet? Do they know that Cazador’s Ascension would pose a threat to all of Baldur’s Gate? Do they have any means of finding the entrance to his palace without a former resident in the party (or convenient map marker)? Now, toss in the fact that, depending on how many long rests you’ve done, the party has only been traveling together for a matter of days/weeks. They know one another deeply (yay trauma bonding) but once separated that timeframe feels pretty insignificant, particularly to someone who has existed for over 200 years. Even if you’re romancing Astarion and he has more reason to believe that this short period of time was emotionally meaningful, he’s still admitted to manipulating you, to molding your emotions to best ensure his protection... but protection never extended to this.

Besides, Astarion has literally been here before. No heroes rescued him across two centuries of enslavement. Why would they rescue him now?

Except, it’s far worse this time around, isn’t it? Cazador isn’t merely his abuser, he’s now set to become an all-powerful vampire whose hold will truly be unbreakable. Astarion isn’t merely a slave to one individual, he’s now got a ticking time bomb in the form of a parasite set to enslave him to another. (And isn’t that something to chew on: him cursing the fact that the artifact’s protection still extends to him. At least as a Mind Flayer he wouldn’t feel anymore, would have a chance to fight back.) This time around Astarion isn’t just another beloved “child” of Cazador’s, he’s uniquely gifted in his ability to walk in the sun and resist commands. The hells only know what Cazador will make him do with that newfound power if he survives the ritual— or how Cazador will ensure Astarion’s continued “loyalty” while he does it. Worst of all though... now Astarion has had a chance to see what life could be like. Freedom. Agency. People who love him despite all the reasons they shouldn’t. Whoever said, “Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all” was a fucking fool. It’s so much worse to go backwards, to have lost not merely the life you dreamed of, but also the ability to pretend you never needed it in the first place.

Imagine that Astarion. Picture how broken he would be.

Now imagine the party kicking down Cazador’s door. The look on Astarion’s face when he realizes that despite the danger, the practical hurtles, the bigger stakes at play, the fact that it’s him... they came anyway.

#BG3 #Baldur's Gate 3 #Astarion

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newwritergirl · 7 months ago

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Starting over | Part 16

Materlist

Summary: With Jake and Bradley deployed y/n can't help herself but count the days when they're finally back home. But when mysterious messages appear on her phone and a sleazy guy gets a bit too close to her she once more realize how her safety depends on the both pilots she dearly loves. Thank God she has a safety net and friends at base.

Trigger Warnings: 18+! Minors DNI! past abusive relationship, reader has health issues (migraine, kidney), throwing up, previous assault, blood, obstrusive man, poly relationship

A/N: It gets angsty! Please tell me if you like it and rebelog my little story. Thank you for the support :)

Word Count: 3.9k +

The day of Jake and Bradley’s departure came quicker than the three of them anticipated. Y/n wasn’t able to sleep that night, tossing and turning, changing her position ever so often, touching her lovers to memorize every inch of their bodies.

And now standing in the kitchen watching both pilots taking their bags into the trunk of Jake’s truck the whole situation is sinking in. She will be alone for the next two weeks, maybe longer.

Since she left the hospital after surviving the last attack of her boyfriend and the mayor operation marathon she endured to save her kidney she wasn’t alone. She lived for some weeks with the family of her former boss and after her physiotherapy she moved to Miramar immediately living with Rooster and Hangman. It would be a lie to say that she isn’t afraid to be on her own. She fears the lonely nights, laying in the dark alone with her thoughts and memories with no one there to hold her after a nightmare or to hold her in general. While drinking her coffee she gives herself a pep talk for the upcoming farewell. ‘Don’t let on anything. You’re a grown up woman. You can do this. They’re highly decorated Navy aviators, you can’t burden them with your fears shortly before their departure.’

---

“And if there’s a problem…anything you need help with… Mav is there, you can call him or Penny anytime! Bob also said that he can come over if you need someone…”

“Jakey, slow down. I’m not a child…” Y/n tries to calm the blonde pilot down. But he just interrupts her attempt to lighten the mood. “Of course you’re not. But imagine you feeling sick or what if you pass out because of a migraine or your kidney acting up…y/n, we’re just worried. And with limited phone reception on the carrier we would feel better when we know that you will call Bob, Coyote, Penny or Mav. Please baby.” Jake looks deep into her eyes, she sees the worry in them. She is also worried but tries her hardest to hide it in front of them.

She feels Bradley enveloping her with his muscular arms behind so that she’s now fully secured between the two men.

“What Jake wanted to say is: We love you, princess.” He speaks softly into her ear his warm breath making her shudder.

“But we have to go now. Otherwise the Admiral will have our asses for being too late for the departure.”

The two men once more tighten their hug kissing the smaller woman passionately.

She watches Jake’s truck disappearing down the street. She stands there in the driveway for some more minutes until the cold wind produces goosebumps on her entire body and her body starts to shiver form the cold and from the loneliness which slowly settles into her heart. She smells the lingering odor of both her boyfriends on her skin. She loves when their aftershaves mix up into a fully new smell and when she can smell it on her own skin after they cuddled. The delicious sore feeling from their intense night together lets her lips form into a soft smile. She’s not lonely they’re still here with every breath and step she takes in their shared home. They will be back and then their relationship will be just as strong as before or even stronger. With a heavy heart but a small smile on her lips she closes the front door behind her soaking into the warmth of the cozy house.

A cup of tea sounds like a good idea to calm her nerves. Standing on her tip toes to reach her favorite cup a small sticky note on the inside of the cupboard door attracts her attention.

A huge smile is spreading over her face, she takes the sticky note from the cardboard door and sticks it on the coffee maker, that way she can always read the note and admire the accurate handwriting of Bradley. She’s the luckiest woman on earth, finally.

You probably are trying to reach one of the cups, standing on your tip toes stretching out your right arm. Usually one of us would come to your aid or to tease you. Enveloping you in our arms, kissing the top of your head, inhaling your intoxicating scent.

We love you <3 JB

---

Her first day back at the base after her short sick leave and her boys leaving was better than she expected. Her day was busy and with Bob bringing her a cup of steaming hot coffee in the morning just the way she likes it and how Rooster would’ve done it she was able to stay alert and awake during a long video call with a software company. But to be honest she nearly hasn’t slept that night. Her brain was a spiraling mess, thinking of Bradley and Rooster, but she was also nervous to run into Welsh at base. After their encounter the other day when he had to take her home, his slimy hand touching her arm and his inappropriate comment in the car, she doesn’t want to see him let alone run into him alone.

Now sipping her second coffee in the late morning she wonders if her two boyfriends had a similar hard night, at least they have themselves. Her vibrating mobile is bringing her out her daydream. When she looks at the display a bright smile forms on her face.

Jakey: Hello love, we’re about to leave the coastland to start with the flight training. Soon there will be no phone reception. We just wanted to make sure you’re ok. We love you.

Her smile grows brighter when she looks at the attached photo Jake sent her. The blonde and the brunette aviator in their flight suits smiling at her, in the background nothing but the endless blue sea.

Y/n: You two look really stunning. I’m so proud of my two Navy men <3 Everything is good back home. Please just come back in one piece, I need you. Both! I love you. Please tell Roo-y I love him, too. Take care. I think of you!

Jakey: Roo-y says he loves you, too! Take care yourself. In case you need anything, call Penny, Mav or the two idiots that stayed back at the base :-P we have to go. Love you so much!

A loud knock is startling her, shouting a small ‘come in’ she is greeted by the last person she wants to see right now, especially when she’s alone in her office. What does he want from her? She puts her mobile away, not risking that this sleazy guy sees the adorable selfie of Hangman and Rooster on her phone.

“Well, isn’t this a sight for sore eyes. You feeling better, y/n? This migraine must’ve hit you hard.” Welsh voice makes her shudder which doesn’t go unnoticed by the taller man, perfectly noticing how the woman in front of him shrinks further into her chair as if she wants to hide herself behind her big wooden desk.

“Yes, Sir. Thank you.” She talks in a small voice.

“Good, good. Finally you have this big and cozy house for yourself, with Rooster and Hangman deployed. I bet the first night was a huge relief.” Welsh asks in an amused tone. Of course the first night was far away from a relief. At first y/n tried to settle down in her own bed but after tossing and turning she wandered into Jake’s bedroom to grad his pillow and went straight into Bradley’s bedroom to sleep in his bed with Jake’s pillow in her arms. That way she could be near both of them. Their familiar scents united created a small feeling of safety in the dark and lonely night.

What does he want to hear from her? She tries to gather her thoughts not to show this man any weakness. But before she can form a suitable answer she’s saved by the bell.

“Hey y/n. You ready for lunch?” She hears Javy’s voice before she can see him enter her office.

“Welsh. What ya doin’ here? Mav is looking for ya…” Javy’s voice immediately changes from friendly to professional and even colder as he looks at the man towering over y/n’s desk.

Daniel straightens his posture but before he turns around to leave the younger woman’s office he winks at her and lowers his voice. “See you later, darling.” Too hushed to be heard by Javy but loud enough for y/n to hear.

She gulps at his words. He has this dangerous aura she’s more than familiar with thanks to her ex.

Javy steps into Welsh’s way bumping slightly into his shoulder. “Keep track of your own appointments, Lieutenant. We’re not your secretary.”

“Yes, Lieutenant Commander.” Welsh replies in an annoyed tone but formal when Coyote pulled ranks.

---

Y/n’s lunch date with Bob and Javy really helped to get her nerves under control after Welsh’s performance in her office today. She just hoped that the two didn’t notice how she played with her food, just shoving it on her plate from left to right. She didn’t build a huge appetite with her boyfriends away and the dreading prospect of coming back to an empty home later that day.

Now utterly exhausted she’s sitting on the huge couch snuggled under the cozy blanket Jake bought for her last Christmas, reading the second note which she found in the snack drawer where Bradley stored his favorite protein bars. Not on the mood to cook something she was in search of something to munch on while lounging on the couch.

On the verge of falling asleep her vibrating mobile gains her attention. She really hopes for another message from her boys but that was likely unrealistic with them in the middle of the Pacific.

I knew you would steeal my banana protein bars in our absence :-P What have I done to deserve two little thieves.

I love u.

Jake says eat as much protein bars as you can. Love <3 JB

She grabs the device from the coffee table curious who would’ve texted her that late in the evening.

The message from an unknown number makes her frown.

Unknown: You looked so hot today in your cute office outfit. You should wear that tight skirt more often.

Her hands begin to tremble that must be a mistake. Who would text her something like that? The person on the other end probably made a mistake while typing in the number and now she got that message accidently. Just as she wants to put her phone away and get ready for another lonely night in Bradley’s bed her mobile chirps with another incoming message.

Unknown: Didn’t think of you as a classic car kind of girl. But that Bronco looks good on you.

The last straw that the message could’ve been a mistake is brutally cut when she reads the next one. Bradley left her his beloved Bronco so she can drive to base and get grocery shopping or whatever she wants to do safely and doesn’t have to rely on Bob or Javy to drive her. At first she was hesitant to drive his beloved car but Bradley told her more than once that he insists that she drives his Bronco and he made it more than clear that he trusts her with his baby.

Panic bubbles in chest. Someone watches her, the person saw her in the Bronco driving home or to the base, saw her outfit. Is this person watching her now? Hiding in the dark? She jumps up from her position on the couch and hurries to the front door checking the locks. They’re closed, thank God. She closed all curtains in every room and when she finally crawls into Bradley’s bed, after she even locked the bedroom door, she can’t hold back her tears anymore. She is afraid, more than that. She’s terrified.

---

Y/n wakes up with a jolt. The bedroom pitch black and her eyes need some time to adjust and make out the familiar furniture. What woke her up in the middle of the night? But before she can wonder any further the door knob jiggles. Someone is trying to enter the bedroom.

“Y/n, come on open the door, I know that you’re in there.”

She knows that voice. No, no, no, that can’t be true. He can’t be in their house, not now.

Frantically she searches for some kind of weapon to defend herself. But when she turns around to look at the bedroom door he’s already inside the room.

"I'm here to take you home, silly girl." His dark eyes nothing but dangerous and filled with hate. She got so used to the warm love filled eyes of Jake and Bradley. But the ones that are piercing her now are cold and she knows that look, it's full of rage.

How did he get past the safety locks at the front door and how did he even open the lock of the bedroom door? She feels like his prey sitting in a trap. His body fills the doorframe, blocking her only way out of the room. On trembling legs y/n backs off but there's nowhere to go for her. He finally gets what he wants, either he kills her right there or he takes her back to their hometown. If she has the choice she would choose death over going back with him. But she has no choice, never had. He once more has her life in his hand.

"You not only cheated with one but with two men? Y/n, that's not how I taught you to behave. You should know what treatment sluts like you deserve." He takes a step closer to the trembling woman. A shimmering object in his right hand attracts her attention. It's a knife, a huge kitchen knife. It's the same knife he attacked her with back home, still bloody. Thick droplets of blood are dripping from the blade on the hardwood floor.

A loud scream echoes trough the bedroom the young woman feels herself shaking like a leaf, drenched in sweat, sheets tangled around her body. All she hears is the blood rushing in her ears. Her heart nearly beating out of her chest. Her lungs seem to refuse to work, like someone is crushing her ribcage. Spots are dancing in her vision and she knows she has to try to take prober breaths otherwise she is going to pass out from oxygen deprivation. The small woman fists one of the pillows in her shaking hands in an attempt to ground herself. She has to overcome this panic attack alone, but her thoughts are with Bradley and Jake, thinking about their happy times, smiling and laughing. Their beautiful laughs, their calming touches, their words of endearment. Y/n doesn't know how long it took her to finally be calm enough to take her first steady breath. The first thing she hears is her alarm annoyingly blaring, signaling her it's time to get up. It's already morning, thank God. Going back to sleep seems so far away after this nightmare that she's somewhat relieved that it's already time to get ready and head to work. With her still trembling hands she shuts the alarm off, but as she sees an unread message her breathing picks up one more time.

A sigh of relief tumbles out of her mouth when she reads the sender of the message.

Bobby: Hey y/n, sorry I forgot to ask you earlier. Coyote and I want to hit the Hard Deck after work, I can fetch you in the morning, in that case you don't have to drive tomorrow to work and to the Hard Deck. I would be at your place at 0715.

---

When she is finally buckled in Bob's car it's the first time she can breathe a bit better, feeling a bit safer in the presence of a Navy Lieutenant and friend.

A soft 'good morning' fills the car, not trusting her voice to speak more words after screaming bloody murder an hour ago. She still feels a slight tremble in her hands. Not only the dream has her so shaken up but the messages from that unknown number make her even more uneasy. Who's watching her? It can't be her ex. He doesn't know where she lives now. And he is still in prison, isn't he?

"Y/n? Everything okay?" Bob turns in his seat to take a proper look at her.

His soft voice brings her out of her thoughts.

"Ehm, yes. Sure. Everything's fine." She tries to talk as calm and collected as she can, not wanting to alert the good-natured aviator in the driver seat.

"You sure? I said your name like ten times." He once more takes a look at her, noticing her pale face and the dark circles under her eyes.

"Sorry, I'm just tired, Bobby. Nothing serious, pinky promise." She hates to lie at her friend, hell she hates to lie in general. But her need to not make a fuss, to not burden other people with her problems is often bigger than her need to be honest.

For now Bob let's her excuse pass but he will keep a close eye on her, even more than usual.

---

Sipping her favorite drink y/n feels a bit better than hours ago in the morning after her nightmare. Bob and Javy are always good company and so far she liked the distraction of her two friends and the hustle and bustle of the packed bar. But without the other aviators, especially without her two boyfriends, there's definitely a huge part missing.

"I'm still wondering how you do it, sunshine." Javy spoke over the music and the loud voices in the packed bar, bringing y/n out of her revive.

A curious frown is splayed on the young woman's face.

"I mean, you really brought some peace and quiet into our squad. Since you're living with Hangman and Roo, their constant bickering and dick-measuring contests nearly stopped."

Y/n can't hold the amused laugh that tumbles out of her mouth. "Javy, watch your mouth." She playfully hit the taller pilot on his arm. But he is right, since the young woman lives with the two men their behavior somewhat changed drastically. Of course the hostility they had during the fateful uranium mission was long gone before y/n stepped into their life, but obviously their friendship deepened in a special way since the shy woman is part of the group. The other aviators surely didn't miss the huge protectiveness Jake and Bradley have over their new addition, y/n just fits in perfectly in the Bradshaw/Seresin household. Y/n wonders if Javy wants to imply that he supposes that three of them are now in a relationship. Until now the three kept their love life a secret, well except for Natasha who gave the last shove in the right direction.

"Hey, got a strong right hook, y/n." The dark haired man rubs his arm as if she hurt him really bad.

"What this moron wanted to say is, you're good for them." Bob barges in looking intensively at the now blushing woman.

"Thanks, I guess?" She says slightly uncertain. "They're the best that ever happened to me. You all are…" Y/n admits in nothing more than a whisper.

Bob puts his larger hand on her right one which is placed on the table beside her now empty glass. When he softly squeezes her hand he adds a quiet 'we support you, no matter what'.

Her heart skips a beat, so they all seem somehow to know or feel that Jake, Bradley and y/n are more than just roommates or friends and with Bob and Javy's promise of support a huge load is taken off her mind.

---

"So, another Root Beer for you, what can I get you, sunshine?" Javy asks as he was about to stand up and head to the bar to get them all a refill.

"Oh no, let me. It's my turn. A Root Beer and a Miller?!" Y/n puts her hand on the taller pilot's shoulder to keep him in his seat and makes her way to the restrooms before she is going to order another round of drinks for herself and her two friends at the back of the bar.

Deep in thought she steps out of the ladies' room bumping into a tall figure making her stumble back. Two strong hands grip her shoulders uncomfortably tight but keeping her from falling flat on her ass.

"Wow, look what the cat dragged in. Y/n, nice to see you." She immediately recognizes the sickly sweet with a hint of evil voice.

"H - hello, Sir." She stammers feeling more and more uneasy the longer she feels the two strong hands grip her upper arms.

"Y/n, we're already beyond the formalities and we're not on base. It's Daniel for you." Welsh winks and twists his lips into a daunting grimace.

Y/n feels her heartrate picking up, she doesn't like this guy and being alone with him is only adding up her anxiety. She tries to wiggle out his strong hold but he doesn't budge, cornering her in the hallway of the restrooms.

"Looking cozy with Bob and Coyote, with your two guard dogs deployed." Welsh strokes both his thumbs over her upper arms, sending a shiver of disgust over the smaller woman's spine.

"We - we just having some drinks." Finally able to wiggle herself free of the uncomfortable hold she takes a step back, the need to extend the distance to the dangerous looking man in front of her is growing every second he looks hungrily at her.

"I knew you have a thing for pilots." The man takes a step and strokes once more one of her arms. Panic bubbles up in y/n's chest, she doesn't like to be touched by strangers and this is much worse than just some physical contact in a crowded bar. He corners her and definitely knows what he's doing. Her body starts to tremble and her chest feels too tight to breathe comfortably.

"Everything okay here?" Y/n hears a familiar voice but Welsh is still blocking her view.

"Yeah, everything's good, Captain." Welsh takes a step back as he feels a hand touching his shoulder, turning him around slightly. Y/n takes a sigh of relief. Thank God for Maverick making an entrance. The smaller man is taking a close look at the young woman in front of him. He can see her distress with the taller man in front of her, towering dangerously over her smaller frame. His presence alone is enough to make Welsh leaving the situation and the small hall to the restrooms.

"Are you okay, y/n? Did he - ehm…did he make you uncomfortable?" What Maverick really wanted to ask is if that prick touched her or made inappropriate comments, but he put a bridle on his tongue, not wanting to make the shy woman in front of him more uncomfortable.

"No, no… sorry I was on my way to the ladies' room." And with that she turns around in a hurry disappearing in the restroom. Her intention to get a new round of drinks long forgotten she rushes into one of the stalls falling onto her knees just in time to throw up the small contents of her stomach.

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