#they’re gonna kiss and freak it nasty style
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i like making my favs fuck lol
#megatron#swerve#valveplug#transformers#transformers idw#maccadam#you can’t stop me from pushing these guys together like barbie dolls#art#fanart#transformers art#they’re gonna kiss and freak it nasty style#mtmte
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Could I get a Joel miller x reader fic where the reader gets her period and her past partners always made her sleep on the couch bc they thought it was gross and Joel is just like wtf at someone treating his daeling like that?
Come Back to Bed, Please?
pairing: joel miller x AFAB!reader
genre: romantic fluff <3
summary: you get your period and freak out over what Joel’s reaction could be.
warning/contents: reader has a period, blood mentions(obv), Y/N is used, AFAB reader, mentions of past relationships, it gets a tad bit angsty.
additional notes: ty for the request!! Im actually AFAB(I identify as agender btw) so I can relate to this 😭
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡��⋅ » ──────»
Your stomach starts to hurt and you immediately realize what time of the month it is. You rush to the bathroom and grab your stash of pads underneath the cold sink.
Knock, knock.
You completely forgot about Joel..
“Uh..Y/N? You..you alright…?” Joel questions worryingly, thinking the worst that could possibly happen to you.
“I’m alright…I’m just on period!” You yell out nervously, hoping that he wouldn’t make a snarky remark or say you’re disgusting.
“Alright, just tell me if you need anything.” He says and you hear him walk away. Fear washes off of you, but confusion starts to settle in when he didn’t give you the reaction you thought we was going to give you. Cleaning yourself up, a cold darkness settles outside, indicating that you should start to go to rest.
“Took Ellie to sleep, she told me to tell you ‘goodnight’” Joel says chuckling softly and you smile.
“Well, I’m tired too. Think I’m gonna head to bed now.” You say as you pick up your pillow and a blanket from you and Joel’s shared bed.
“Woah woah woah! The hell are ya’ doing?”
“Picking up my stuff…?”
“Why?”
“‘Cause I’m on my period, dummy.” You nonchalantly reply, and lay down on the couch. Joel looks at you with the most confused expression ever and realization hits you like a truck.
“That don’t mean you have to sleep on the couch.” His southern deep accent breaks the short silence between the two of you. Opening your mouth, your voice seemingly disappears from your throat, and now you’re the one confused.
“But that doesn’t…that doesn’t make you disgusted? Or something? Doesn’t that bother you?” You say, barely above a whisper.
“No…? Y/N…god dammit.” He pinches the bridge of his nose making you even more confused.
“Wha-“
“I’ve dealt with all sorts of blood before. I’ve seen clickers in front of me, and those shits are nasty. You really think blood like that is gonna bother me?”
Now that he says it, that really doesn’t make sense. His statement lingers in your head for a while before you say something.
“Well- I guess that’s just a reaction I get a lot. My past partners didn’t like the fact that I naturally bled, so they usually made me sleep on the couch.” You admit, looking down at the floor to avoid looking at Joel’s face. He stays silent longer than usual and you look up to see him being shocked.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” You giggle.
“That’s fucking absurd? No one should treat you like that, ever. They’re lucky I don’t know who they are.” He says walking to you and pressing his forehead against yours, pinning you down on the couch. A warm, fuzzy feeling enters your heart and you let your left hand trail up to his cheek. Moonlight hits the floor, brightening the living room.
“It’s not that serious Joel.” You say, playfully rolling your eyes.
“It’s that serious to me, you’re…you’re human. It’s something that happens naturally, if they don’t like that then you should’ve left them.”
Your gaze at him starts to turn blurry as tears show up in your eyes, you kiss him and he unexpectedly picks you up bridal-style. You squeal out his name and he tells you to ‘shush up’. He gently places you down on the bed.
“Get yourself comfortable, I’ll be back in a minute.” The covers of the bed get on top of you and Joel leaves the room.
A few minutes passed, where is this man? you thought, and he walks in the moment you stop thinking.
“U-Uh..H-Here..” you grab a mug out of his hands and embrace the warmth of it.
“What is it?”
“Tea…it’s from a uh..tip that Tess told me that would help with cramps..” Red tints his face, but luckily from the darkness it’s not visible.
“Aww Joel, you didn’t have to do that!” You say as he steps in bed, you take a few sips from the tea and place it down on the table next to the bed. Joel slips more under the bed and fully gets comfortable, and you position to be the big spoon. You arm wraps around his back and you feel Joel kissing your shoulder.
“I love you, don’t let anybody tell you different.”
“Joel…
I love you too.”
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
#joel miller#joel miller x reader#joel miller x AFAB!reader#joel miller x AFAB reader#joel miller x reader fluff#joel miller fluff#pedro pascal#pedro pascal x reader#pedro pascal fluff#fluff
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Enemies to Lovers!AU with Xiaojun
—
Group: NCT [+ WayV]
Member: Xiaojun / Xiao Dejun
Genre: fluff, comedy, romance
Type: Bulletpoint AU
Word Count: approx. 2.4k
so, you’re Xiaojun’s enemy (he thinks of it more of his number one attacker tho)
it wasn’t hard considering he’s always on fight or flight mode and considering his friend group….
fight mode is always activated
(ง’̀-‘́)ง
so it started when you became friends with Ten
the guy is so sociable, so you were bound to meet him and his other friends someday
but jesus christ, there were soooo many of them
it was a party; he threw a literal party of just him and his friends
and then there were others who turned it into a rave (i.e. Hendery, Yangyang, Chenle and Donghyuk)
anyways, you got to mingle and make so many new friends
it was going really well
until Xiaojun entered the picture
things went well with him too, until you made a joke that didn’t exactly land with him
but it landed well with the others
Lucas: “who in their right mind would like mint chocolate”
Xiaojun: “but I like mint chocolate”
You: “then you’re not in your right mind lmao”
YangYang: “I mean, is Xiaojun ever in his right mind tho”
everyone laughs
except for one person
Xiaojun stood up, staring you down for a hot second, before trying to argue back
in which YangYang was the main responder
you didn’t really think much of it, laughing away with the others
but, to him, you just declared war that day
it shouldn’t have bothered him as much as it did
but it did
so, from then on, things just got rockier
bc he started picking fights with you over the littlest things or he would argue with your points no matter what
you didn’t really think much of it bc he was also being picked on everyone else and you were like
every man for themselves huh
it wasn’t until he personally attacked you
it happened on Halloween
and he made an underhanded comment about how he’d look better in anything compared to you
so you made a “friendly” bet
but then you lost
bc Xiaojun looked better in the Jasmine costume than you and he def knew it too
and when he smirked at you
the grudge had been built
that’s probably when the mutual enemy status circulated around your friends
although, if they’re being honest, it’s so entertaining
especially since most of them like to gang up on Xiaojun too
and because of that unity, it’s only made things worse
from what the others can tell
you two don’t hate each other, but you def don’t get along
it ranges to food (e.g. mint chocolate chip incident that NO ONE lets go)
Lucas: “mint choco ain’t shit”
You: “retweet”
Xiaojun: “the attacks”
YangYang: “we cannot trust a man who eats bread with fucking lao gan ma”
You: “you eat what with bread?”
Xiaojun: “shut up. all of you.”
to activities
cue you two fighting about what movie to watch
Xiaojun: “Titanic is a classic!!!”
You: “it’s a joke, there was rOOM ON THE FUCKING DOOR”
Xiaojun: “IT’S ROMANTIC. HE SACRIFICED HIMSELF SO SHE CAN LIVE.”
You: “THAT’S NOT ROMANTIC. THAT’S SUICIDAL, DUMBASS.”
this feud is def bc you’re both petty as fuck
the bickering is nonstop
but, if the nct boys are being honest
they’re lowkey confused bc Xiaojun is supposed to have a really high emotional tolerance
he doesn’t even yell this much at YangYang or Ten
(excluding that one time he hit YangYang with that pillow very hard)
but he does blow off his top when it comes to you
which is sus to a lot of the boys
whenever someone does ask him tho
he just kind of……………
mumbles underneath his breath and then moves onto something else
meanwhile, Yuta: “isn’t he always like that?”
Kun: “who wants to tell him”
lmao, I’m kidding
kind of
anyways, you two are really just going at it
what changes?
you have to go to the dentist and get your molars removed
which means someone has to take you and go pick you up
obviously, Ten was going to do that, considering you two were the closest
so he dropped you off and you had your surgery
so what happened?
welp, your buddy Ten forgot he had a prior engagement and, hence, was unable to pick you up
cue him spamming the groupchat
and Lucas exposing Xiaojun
Lucas: Xiaojun isn’t doing anything Xiaojun: you don’t know that Lucas: I do tho, go pick up (Y/N) Ten: I’ll buy you anything from that green tea cafe you like for a week Xiaojun: deal.
so he came to pick you up, both willingly and unwillingly
and you……. you were more than a hot mess
you were just a mess
you basically were just blacked out that entire time after they gave you the laughing gas and completed the surgery
so you remembered absolutely nothing.
your roommate: “this is what you get for doing drugs”
You: “IT WAS PURELY FOR MEDICINAL USE”
You: “IT’S NOT LIKE I DID CRACK”
either way, your roommate let you know of the situation, taking note of how your enemy had to take you home
which
again
no recollection
your roommate: “he’s fucking hot tho”
You: “ugh, I know”
but that’s also when you decided
Ten is a dead man :)
Ten: “I’M SORRY”
You: “YOU BETTER FUCKING BE”
Ten: “I KNOW”
Ten: “............................................but………………………………….”
Ten: “maybeyoushouldalsothankhimfortakingcareofyou”
You: “sorry not sorry, I’m contemplating murder rn”
Hendery: “what do you call a murder against a friend?”
Kun: “don’t”
Ten:
You:
Hendery: “it’s a homie-cide”
You and Ten: “NOT NOW”
anyways
you knew he was right
so after you calmed down, you went to Xiaojun’s place (thanks to Ten), with some sweets to thank him
Lucas opened the door, let you in, and left to go to the gym with Sicheng
Xiaojun came out of his room, a couple of minutes after, disheveled from his nap
and when he saw you in his living room couch, his eyes widened, darting around to avoid looking at you
You: “hi”
Xiaojun: “hello”
You: “why do you look so scared? I’m not gonna jump you”
he stays quiet, the blush becoming more apparent on his cheeks
You: “Ten told me you took me home after my surgery, so…………………… thanks”
Xiaojun: “he bribed me with pastries”
You: yeah, sounds about right
You: “still”
You: “um, I didn’t know what you would like, so I brought some sweets you can just go through”
Xiaojun: “thanks”
it’s silent for another moment and you consider bolting out from the apartment, Wizards of Waverly Place, Harper-style: “see ya in p.e.!” kind of a thing
but he speaks up once more
Xiaojun: “are you feeling okay now?”
You: “uh, yeah, my jaw still kind of hurts”
You: “but I have meds they prescribed to me for the next month or so”
he decides to stop beating the bush:
Xiaojun: “so do you remember what happened yesterday?”
You: “to be completely honest, no”
Xiaojun: “you… did a lot of things”
You: “what do you mean I did a lot of things”
Xiaojun: “you also said a lot of things too”
You: “..... are these things recorded?”
Xiaojun: “maybe”
Xiaojun: “some”
You: “dELETET HEM”
you actually considered tackling him, but deemed as too Yang-Yang-like
You: “what did I say”
Xiaojun: “I didn’t realize you thought I was handsome”
You: “wait what?”
Xiaojun: “you said, you had a crush on my ‘fine ass’”
You: “you know what? I think I’m gonna pull a Jack and commit suicide, goodbye”
Xiaojun: “ah, ah, ah, you said like, which is… present tense”
You: “semantics”
Xiaojun: “but did you like me at some point?”
You: “does it matter?”
Xiaojun: “yeah, it kind of does”
Xiaojun: “bc even tho we bicker, it’s, like, our thing”
Xiaojun: “plus, you’re kind of cute when you’re threatening to rip off my eyebrows”
You: “I did what?”
Xiaojun: “it’s no different from how you treat me now”
You: “I thought it’s because you don’t like me”
he just kind of shrugs, rubbing his neck rather sheepishly
Xiaojun: “you’ve seen my friends; arguing is our way of showing our affections”
You: “so, you’re saying this is your way of telling me you like me?”
Xiaojun: “I mean………“
Xiaojun: “are you saying you like me?”
You: “are you saying you like me?”
*cue another argument about who likes who*
eventually, he found a way to shut you up
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
cut to Lucas and Sicheng coming back from the gym to you and Xiaojun making out on the couch
Lucas: “NASTY”
Sicheng: “what did we…. miss?”
Ten somewhere: I fucking called it.
anyways
you both decided to date that day
and you two still bicker an insane amount, which includes you nitpicking Xiaojun’s tastes to Xiaojun refusing to delete those videos of you under the laughing gas despite your threats
but, the only difference is, your arguments can end with a kiss
and it always freaks out the guys whenever you do
Donghyuk: “I’m too young to be seeing this monstrosity”
Mark: “ngl, this is nice for them—they’ve stopped arguing”
YangYang: “I weirdly prefer them arguing over them with those sappy eyes tho”
You: “we can hear you”
Chenle: “but when have we ever cared?”
You: “I’m gonna beat your ‘01 liner ass istg—”
Xiaojun: “calm”
oh, you know what’s fun about your relationship?
you two can’t agree on some stuff right?
so whenever you have to decide something, say a movie or dinner, you two just heads-or-tails it
(there’s also this cute app where you put your options on a wheel and let that decide—the amount of times you’ve used that on your dates…… anyways)
most of the time, on these dates, you seem more like an old married couple and it’s super cute
it’s bc you’re already used to your worse sides coming out—the really petty ones, the screaming ones, the ugly ones
ofc these aren’t from serious arguments that occur
(remember folks, it isn’t healthy for you and your partner to always be fighting)
but when serious arguments do occur, you both take time to sit down and talk face-to-face
it’s hard to get into actual arguments with him, especially since he really is understanding and tries to pay attention to the smaller details
Xiaojun: “I like learning more about you”
You: “you can’t just say that kind of shit to me”
like, yeah, he’ll debate with you all night about why he needs to read the words of his book out loud but, by the end of the day, you’ll lay your head in his lap and listen to his voice as you fall asleep
speaking of which, you love listening to him sing to you
he gets a bit embarrassed sometimes about it, but seeing you smile so brightly at him makes him forget about it
because even tho you two bicker about little things, in the end, it just makes you two laugh at one another and how ridiculous you’re being
I almost forgot, so Ten thinks of him pairing you two off right?
so, whenever he does something annoying to either of you, he’ll constantly bring it up
Ten: “I guess this is how you two treat me, your personal cupid—”
Xiaojun: “yes, yes, we are grateful for you”
You: “but it would be nice if you would stop making those annoying sounds”
Ten: “what annoying sounds?”
YangYang: “that’s just you talking”
okay, no, but yeah—the nct boys are glad this rivalry is over because it was really just…. stupid to the core
but also bc you two look super sweet together and seeing you two making each other happy rather than annoyed is adorable
but just bc you two got together doesn’t mean the pettiness isn’t still there
You: “what type of freak sleeps with their eyes opened?”
Xiaojun: “I’m sleeping next to you, of course I need to keep both eyes open”
You: “RUDE”
Xiaojun: “and yet here we are”
You: “son of a bitch”
Xiaojun: “YOUR son of a bitch”
You: “eh, I’ll take it”
#admin grandma#grandma aus#aus#fluff#romance#kpop#kpop aus#kpop imagines#kpop scenarios#nct#nct aus#nct imagines#nct scenarios#wayv#wayv aus#wayv imagines#wayv scenarios#nct xiaojun#nct dejun#wayv xiaojun#wayv dejun#xiaojun aus#xiaojun imagines#xiaojun scenarios#enemies to lovers!au#enemies to lovers!xiaojun#group: nct#group: wayv#member: xiaojun
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Let’s keep the questions rolling folks the story may be over but the thoughts are strong!! Do they ever reminisce about their first time together? Or even their first make out/grind session? What about when either of them are sick with a cold or something? What does Harry do when he really misses y/n but can’t text/call because an away game or practice? Vice versa? I kind of want to know what Ang would say about them getting back together? I feel Julia might want to fight a little too..? 👀
Sometimes if they’re having a cozy/boozy night in, they reminisce. Or sometimes if they try something new she laughs to herself about how timid she was when they first started hooking up.
Harry gets a nasty cold more so than Y/N. She’s quick to make him soup and tea, and help him relax. He gets anxious from being sick because he doesn’t want to miss class.
When Harry really misses Y/N, but can’t really talk to her, he’ll still send her a text letting her know he was thinking of her in that moment. He’ll mostly look through previous texts or pictures of her. She also may or may not have gotten him a stuffed bear that he can snuggle at night when she can’t be there. He also did the same for her.
The we got back together conversation:
“She’s coming to campus?!”
“Harry, my mom wasn’t going to miss my senior night.”
“Does she know we’re back together?”
“She knows...um...yeah, she knows.” She sighs. “She’s not very happy with you, or me for that matter.”
“Why isn’t she happy with you?”
“Because she think I’m stupid for getting back together with someone who quit when it got too difficult.” Harry opens his mouth and closes it again. “I told her that it wasn’t really the case. I mean, you and I have had a lot of conversation since we decided we wanted to make this work, and I told her that. And then it was a whole thing about how we’re adults but we’re also not really adults, and that one of us could turn around again and say we don’t want to do this.”
“Not gonna happen.”
“I know that...now.” She wraps her arms around his neck. “She wants you to sit with her at the game.”
“But I’m afraid.” He pouts. “She liked me so much, and I ruined it.”
“I’m probably not your mom’s favorite person either right now.”
“True...but I think she was more on your side than mine at the end of the day.”
“It’ll be fine. I love you and I wanna be with you, and my mom can deal with it.” She gives him a lip smacking kiss before stepping away.
Harry was shaking in his boots on the night of the game. He had a large bouquet ready to give to Y/N. Both he and Angie would be walking out onto the ice to deliver gifts to her, as how most senior nights go. He adjusts his glasses and takes a deep breath when he sees Angie walking up the steps of the lobby. She takes a deep breath too and walks towards him, guarded, but also holding her own bouquet.
“Hi.” He says softly.
“Hello.”
“It’s...um...good to see you again.”
“Is it? Wish I could say the same, Harry.” She looks him up and down. “My daughter may have been quick to forgive you, but I’m not.”
“It wasn’t just me that decided to end things, you know?”
“Really? Because from what she told me you were the one to bring it up and finalize it.”
“I thought I was doing the right thing. If I wasn’t one-hundred percent sure about us it wouldn’t have been fair to her to keep things going.”
“Oh, so, what...not even a month and half later you’re sure now? She told me what happened. You saw her at a party and didn’t like that she was moving on so you yanked her back in?”
“I missed her like crazy, and I still had feelings for her, and when I saw her out...I don’t know! What do you want me to say?! That I’m a moron? Because I know I am, Angie! I made a huge mistake because I was scared. I don’t know what I want to do with my life just yet, but I know it won’t be much of a life at all if she’s not in it.” He huffs and stands his ground. “I’m never going to hurt her like that again.”
“You can’t guarantee that.” She sighs. “But that’s a worry all parents have, unfortunately. You’re her first love, and honestly I didn’t think you two would last as long as you did. I tried explaining to her after you broke up that you were just first in a long line of loves, but she didn’t want that. She wanted you to be her only, and that’s what broke my heart the most.”
Harry was absolutely gutted.
“I know it’s going to take a long time to gain your trust back. But, your kindness towards me has meant so much over the years. You’ve become a second mum to me, and I don’t want to lose that. I don’t care how long it takes, I’ll make this up to you, to everyone.”
“I know a lot of this is on her too. I see both sides of it, I really do. She was really starting to get ahead of herself...I probably would have freaked out too. And I suppose it’s good that you two took some time to be apart, just so you could see how it felt...” She groans. “Pardon the pun, but you’re on very thin ice, Styles. I’m talking next time you come home with her for a weekend you’re back to sleeping in separate rooms thin ice, I’m talking you working shifts at the bar in the back scrubbing dishes thin ice.”
“Sounds pretty reasonable to me.” He gives her a soft smile.
She rolls her eyes and opens her arms up and he hugs her. It’s a nice, good hug to clear all the air. It was a fresh start.
“Alright, come on, we better get down there so we can give her these. The arrangement you got is beautiful.” She says to him as the enter the arena.
“Thanks, I like the one you got too.”
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RDR2 Boys as Sugar Daddies
This is so nasty don’t read it 👀
18+!!!
Basically just don’t tell the lawmen I wrote it
Arthur
His main goal is for you to look nice by his side and for people to be jealous
To say he wants an absolute doll would be an understatement
This man wants a quiet sugar baby who does whatever he wants
And that’s not to say that means someone submissive, just that he wants someone who is open to anything and doesn’t question his requests
Honestly, just let him choose what you wear
Model everything for him in the dressing room so he can decide if things are a yes or no
He always says yes, but it’s a process that you cannot skip
He also likes a sugar baby who’s happy to see him
The more excited and grateful and kissy you are when you’re around him, the better
Totally milks you for kisses any chance he gets
Specifically, cheek kisses (in public)
“All I get is a thank you?” or “I’m not so sure, I’m gonna need some more convincing”
Initiate sex in his car, you won’t regret it
Also, go with him when he’s shopping for himself...
The flex rates will be off the charts
Gets you one of those lil necklaces with his initials on it
Please wear his Vineyard Vines flannels
It’s instant boner material
John
Bad at being a sugar daddy, but he gets the job done
Basically just gets you a credit card attached to his account and leaves it at that
But he loves seeing the your style morph as you buy new clothes and jewelry
And loves seeing the designer tags and receipts that get left around his house
Spends a lot more time trying to do stuff with you rather than buy you things
He’s the one who takes vacations and yacht trips (and whatever else rich people do idfk) because he doesn’t know how else to spoil you
He’s also the one who wears $500 sweatpants and Gucci slippers all the time
He’s a bad father not because he doesn’t care about Abigail and Jack, but he takes you to Jack’s sports games and performances (ouch)
He’s not doing it to be malicious though, he just likes to take his sugar baby along with him when he goes places
And honestly it’s fine because Abigail makes his pockets hurt too
If you try to take him clothing or jewelry shopping with you, he gets so confused
You could be trying on the ugliest, most expensive outfit and he’d be like “Yes, looks great, I love it” or could be trying to choose between two pairs of diamond earrings and he wouldn’t be able to tell them apart
TBH, has a private chef
Charles
All about the subtleties
Expensive flowers and wine delivered to your door
Has custom bracelets and rings made to give you
Picks you up from work in his expensive ass car
Doesn’t care if you’re walking around barefaced in pajamas as long as you’re wearing the gold necklace he got you
He doesn’t really care for doing the shopping with you, but he does want you to be happy
If you ask for anything, he just hands you his credit card and car keys
And then expects you to show (*cough* model) it all to him later, of course
Expect to go out to expensive dinners CONSTANTLY
Also to do other fun things, like go to ballgames, concerts, and etc.
Probably has a membership at every single private club and store in the area
Loves a good designer, pink sheer bathrobe and matching fuzzy slippers vibe
Also… lipstick stains
He will walk around all day with them on his face on purpose
If someone points it out, he smiles and ignores them
Posts pictures of you guys together on social media and doesn’t respond to comments
Buys you all the latest technology the day it comes out
New phone, new headphones, new vacuum cleaner, and anything at all
Basically what I’m saying is: marry him
Micah
Since we’re already being nasty, he’s probably just in it for the sex
He wants you to look nice too, but for him, it’s more about the reward he gets from it at the end
AKA: Taking it off of you
He’s a freak of nature, so his favorite thing is seeing his sugar baby in pretty heavy makeup
Mostly because he likes seeing it run and smear over time
Gets off to you telling other people how much you love him and showing off everything he’s bought you
He’s also willing to spend more on you if you brag
Like Arthur, he likes to have a deciding vote on everything you buy, but he actually takes it seriously and comments on how things look
Probably ends up complaining if you want to buy things that aren’t meant to impress him (see: pajamas, expensive snacks, furniture, etc. )
If you beg hard enough though, he’ll just sigh and give in
“I work so hard for you and give you so much and this is how you treat me?”
Sugar baby: “Yes.”
Expects nudes in the underwear he ships to your house
They’re all G-strings, see through, or latex
Kieran
One of those sugar daddies who mostly just wants the emotional connection
But that’s okay because he’s a sweetie and we love him
Enjoys it when his sugar baby gets a little bratty
He’s not into the punishing aspect of it, but loves feeling needed and useful
Basically just boss him around a little bit
Has all your clothes tailored specifically for you
Likes to hold all your shopping bags at the mall while you run around buying things
If you genuinely ask him for advice, suggestions, or thoughts on anything you want to get, he immediately has to get it for you… Doesn’t matter what it is or if it’s ugly, them’s the rules
He’s mostly just so touched that you care what he thinks
Please introduce him to your coworkers so he can flex
He’s pretty humble about it, but it’s still fun
Probably owns some super large ranch out in the country that you both vacation at a lot
The one social media post he makes of you is a picture of you riding a fancy horse there
It’s blurry, but it’s the thought (and the flex) that counts
Wear anything with his name on it and he has to pass away immediately
Javier
As long as you’re in expensive clothes and makeup, he doesn’t really care about much else
And not just any expensive clothes, the expensive clothes that HE picked out
Usually they match his
You can suggest things for him to buy, but overall he likes to pick things out
The intent of making you look nice is so that he looks better
Enjoys it when you hang on his arm and dote on him
Be taller than him.
Even if it takes heels, do it
Posts pictures of his sugar baby on social media
Lowkey his entire feed is just you in a different outfit in every single photo
The captions are all like “Had fun today” or “👍”
Hair and nails always done 24/7
He makes the appointments for you
If you let him choose the color and style, you will be rewarded
Hires a limo for every occasion
And yes, he has a private driver
As long as he’s flexing with you, he’s happy
Sean
Anything you want, you have to ask for
Not because he doesn’t want to get it for you, but because he wants to hear you beg for it (and whine)
Literally just wants to show his sugar baby off
All he does at parties is talk about you
How you met, how sweet you’ve been, how pretty you are, etc.
Constantly bringing you flowers
So many flowers that they’re practically just laying around your house
Sex in dressing rooms
No, he’s not afraid to give you oral in them
And yes, it’s obvious
Slips the attendant some cash on the way out because you feel so bad for them
Probably has tabs open at most shops and clubs, so paying isn’t a problem after he introduces you to staff
Pays for a private booth at a nightclub vibes
Sit on his lap to make the other boys jealous
#red dead redemption 2#red dead redemption 2 headcanons#rdr2#rdr2 headcanons#arthur morgan x reader#i stayed up late to finish this so i hope u like it#ive had p*ssy talk on repeat all day#but sugar daddy headcanons have alwasys been my guilty pleasure smh#but send me some suggestions for hcs!! i need inspiration#u can always just drop a reply or leave them in the tags
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Tumbling Downhill (1)
During the time of transfer Harry from 4 Privet Drive to the borrow everyone is stressed out, especially you, losing Mad eye, everything spirals, but a new curse strikes you and changes your life.
Word Count- 1669
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“Everyone move, don’t stray if someone gets killed!” Mad-Eye yelled stepping onto his broom, Harry look alike stepped on his broom with him, I watched my him fly away.
“Lia let’s go,” Remus Lupin called grabbing me, I looked down, dressed as Harry, forgetting I had taken the polyjuice potion. “Are you ready?” He asked stepping on his broom, I copied his action wrapping my arms around his torso.
“No I’m not ready, please don’t die,” I yelled leaning my head on his back. “I’m scared,” I called out holding onto him tighter.
“We’re not gonna die, get down!” He yelled turning the both of us, I lifted my head up looking at all the death eaters that flew around us. “Be brave little one!” Remus yelled to me.
I took my right hand off of Remus’ torso, grabbing my wand out of my pocket, hitting a death eater quickly as they came flying towards us. “I did that!” I yelled surprised in myself.
“We’re coming to the clearing, watch it!” Remus yelled again, I watched death eater after death eater follows us. “We have to get rid of them!” He screamed stressing out.
“Stupify!” I yelled turning my torso almost all the way around, three of the four death eaters were gone, Lucius Malfoy was the last one. “Go away!” I yelled unconfident in myself.
Lucius raised his wand, not pointing to me, at Remus who was distracted, I watched hesitating what to do. “Don’t let me die!” I yelled at Remus, feeling a stinging sensation in my body, I waved my wand with the last of my energy, watching a bright light admin, flashing Lucious.
“What the hell did you just do!” Remus called landing on the ground. “Why would you do that, I need help!” Remus shouted grabbing my body, I watched my long blonde hair fall in front of my face.
“Well we would have both been dead if he hit you, I’m fine,” I whispered to Remus as he picked me up bridal style and brought me inside. “It’s okay, I’m breathing, right,” I coughed being placed on the couch.
“Oh, Merlin what happened!” Molly shouted, I turned my head over to the other couch, George was laying on the couch with a towel on his head. “Bring her upstairs, Ginny's room now please,” She demanded looking at me.
“I’m fine right? Im fine?” I asked feeling Remus pick me up again. “See if I let you get hit this would be you,” I said to Remus watching him carry me up the stairs. “Hey, my body is tingling,” I whispered looking at Remus who looked down at me angry.
“You should have let me get hit, I could have handled it little one,” Remus said setting me down on Ginny bed. “What is wrong with her?” He asked Molly who ran into the room with a cloth in her hand.
“This is gonna hurt I’m warning you,” Molly said placing the cloth on my head and lifting my shirt up. “They’re creating their own spells, it happened to Geroge too,” Molly said placing her wand on my stomach. “You might wanna get out for this,” She said to Remus, my whole body started burning, started from the top of my toes, rushing through my whole body, burning my stomach and racing in my head.
I let out a scream, my hands were grabbing my Remus who stood with me looking down at me with concern. It never ended, tears started falling down my face and my whole body started twitching.
“We’re almost done, almost done little one,” Remus whispered, I let out another scream, everything started shaking around me and I fluttered my eyes closed slowly forgetting about my mine and all the noise that was going on around me.
~
“She’s gonna be okay, a bit of a nasty scar though across her stomach, she’ll be okay though,” Molly said, I tried moving my arm but couldn’t, I just laid there.
“Mum this is insane,” Ron's voice said, he was much closer than Molly, almost like he was sitting next to me, I forced my eyes opened looking at the ginger boy who sat beside me like I thought. “Lia,” Ron said with a smile.
“I’m alive,” I chuckled looking at Ron. “Hi,” I smiled forcing my around out and grabbing onto Ron's hand.
“Good morning,” Remus said sitting in the room also. “Could I talk to Lia alone please, just her and I,” Remus said standing up. I looked at Ron and nodded my head, Molly whispered something to Remus then walked out followed by Ron.
“Bit of a nasty scar,” I chuckled looking down. “Boys like a scar,” I chuckled but Remus didn’t budge. “Don’t look at me like that, I did it and saved the both of us, I’m alive,” I said forcing myself to sit up and look at Remus.
“I hope you know if Sirius had seen what you had done tonight you would have had a heart attack and been so proud of you,” Remus said with his hands crossed. “You went from not being able to cast a spell to take a spell for me, and you say your not brave little one,” he said sitting down on the chair Ron was sitting on.
“Yeah, he would be proud huh,” I chuckled grabbing onto Remus's hand. “You're the only family I have left, don’t let me lose you,” I hummed looking at Remus.
“Your the only family I have left too, for a moment there I thought I lost you,” Remus said letting go of my hand and bringing me into a hug, I didn’t care how much it had hurt me I stayed hugging Remus, almost crying.
“Sorry to interrupt,” Ron mustered walking into the room. “I was hoping that I could talk to Lia alone,” He nervously said as Remus let me go, I smiled at Ron then looked at Remus who shook his head and walked out.
“A nasty scar huh,” I chuckled not lifting my shirt up. “What could I help you with?” I asked sitting more up and smiling at the nervous boy.
“I stayed with you, despite what happened to George I didn’t want you to wake up alone,” Ron said sitting down on the chair he had sat down on earlier. “I just wanted to come see how you were doing and how you’re feeling,” He said smiling over at me.
“I’m fine just a bit of a scar, I haven’t look at it yet, fear it might attract the boys,” I joked smiling at Ron. “Thank you for caring about me, not letting me wake up on my own, I appreciate it,” I said with my heart. “What did you wanna talk about now?” I asked.
“Well,” Ron said nervously, he rubbed the back of his neck pausing. “Bill and his fiance, bloody hell I could never remember her name,” Ron stumbled making me chuckle.
“Fluer, her names Fluer Ron,” I cleaned up with a smile. “Their weddings tonight, gosh what a good time to have a wedding,” I laughed making Ron a bit less nervous.
“I was thinking, if you’re all better by tonight if you’d like to be my date?” Ron asked, I had already guessed that part.
“I would love to Ron,” I smiled coughing. “I’ll be fine, just a bit of bruising, you should go downstairs, i’m gonna have a shower,” A said leaning off the bed.
“I’ll be back later tonight okay,” Ron said leaning over and kissing my head. “Be safe,” he whispred walking out of the room.
I tossed the blankets off of me and looked down at my stomach, from the top of my collar bone to down to my pelvic bone laid a scar visible, like one of Remus’ scars but he had been longer.
“Hot,” I muttered to myself walking over to the bathroom across the room. I opened the shower door and stipping my clothes, the hot water washed over me. Tears fall from my face and I leaned against the wall, running my hands up and down my body.
“Does it hurt?” Sirius asked, I shot my head and looked at the corner of the room, the blurred middle of the shower window covered me up. “Yeah don’t freak out, i’m dead,” Sirius chuckled rubbing the back of his neck. “Sorry about that,” He said, my mouth dropped and I looked at Sirius with wide eyes.
“How in the hell am I seeing you,” I whispred pinching my skin, I shut the water off forgetting about everything and tossing my towel over you.
“Your telling me,” Sirius chuckled. “Won’t you tell Harry that i’m sorry for dying,” SIrius said walking over at me.
“Hey beautiful,” Lily Potter siad making me turn around, I looked at the ginger girl who stood in the shower with James Potter beside her. “I’ve heard a lot about you, from Sirius, you two practically raised each other,” She chuckled making James smile, they had looked just the saem from the pictures.
“I’m going crazy,” I cried out walking out of the bathroom and back to the room, Remus stood there smiling at me. “Remus!” I shouted turning around, Sirius smiled and looked at Remus.
“You look like you’ve just seen a ghost,” Remus chuckled. “Dinners ready, I was just coming to get you, come down when your ready,” He said walking out.
“Oh Merlin i’m insane,” I cried out walking to my bed. “Can you please go away well I change?” I asked, Sirius and James, turned around well Lily smiled and did the same as the boys.
“I can’t believe you took that curse,” Sirius gawed making me roll my eyes. “I’ve got it!” He yelled, I tossed my sweater on and just a simple pair of black leggings and turned around to the trio.
“You’ve been cursed,” Mad-Eye said coming out of the bathroom. “I’ve gotten it too before I had died,” He said standing beside James.
“Oh well I don’t wanna see dead people,” I cried out tossing my hands on my head. “Bloody hell this is a mess,” I said shaking my head at the four.
#RegulasBlack#Regulas Black#Regulas Black x y/n#Regulas Black x you#Regulas Black x oc#siriusblack#remuslupin
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Making Out With VAV
Let me start off by saying I've been into VAV since June 2018 and they're coming to my city in a few months. I will fucking die when I see them okay. On an unrelated note the photos with them are like $40 each and if you want one with each member its $250 (which is more expensive than the vvip tickets!) Ugh should I get them all or do 1? I'd feel terrible if one member's line for pics was shorter than another ya know UGH I'M GOING THRU IT PLS HELP ME
I got carried away with some of the members but tried to keep it short so I'm sorry others are longer than some. ^^' I’m not even Baron biased but why does he hurt me so...I’m so sorry Lou.
Thank you to the anon who requested this. As you all can tell, I have a weakness for VAV so I love writing them. - Cookie
St. Van:
I've deadass dreamed about making out with St. Van (who hasn't? you're lying if you said you didn't). He's such a fucking tease LIKE WHY SIR?
Anyway, I can imagine making out with him is ALWAYS hot and heavy, no matter where you are.
He'd much rather make out in his room or your place, where no one can interrupt because 11/10 times it's going to escalate to new heights.
Honestly, he has no preference when it comes to a "make out style". If you want it short and sweet, he's down. Rough with lots of tongue? Sign him up!
Doesn't like much dialog when he's in the mood, he'll catch your face in his hands and open mouth kiss you so you didn't get any mixed signals.
Likes to be dominate no matter what but he likes when you're sitting on his lap.
His hands, without fail, will always be in your hair - stroking, pulling, pushing it from your face.
If it's up, NOT FOR LONG 'cause he'll take it out the ponytail
That's on hair pulling kinks
Be prepared for lots of noise.
He's a moaner and WILL moan in your mouth if you nibble his lip or try to take over the dominate role.
He'll find it so so so hot when you're rough with him - his unoccupied hand will grip your thigh and force you to connect your bodies fully and he'll definitely grind up into you, pushing your hips down into him.
There's absolutely nothing gentle about making out with St. Van.
He won't bruise you but ALMOST.
He'll give you bedroom eyes when you pull away and smirk when he notice how turned on you are.
Leaning back into the couch with his head tilted to the side and breathing just a bit hard, he'll lick his lips disrespectfully. "I like when you're on top, baby girl, but I think we should take this to the bed, hm?"
(FUCK I GTG HOW AM I GONNA LOOK THIS MAN IN THE EYES WHEN I MEET HIM? IDK LORD HELP ME)
Baron:
Ok my sweet baby Baron.
I feel like he's a low key freak.
BUT A GENTLEMAN.
The first couple of make outs are sweet and precious.
He's very loving and kind so he won't be rough with you, like never.
Is so shy the first time, but will initiate it about maybe 3 weeks in the relationship - sooner if you're flirty.
Doesn't know what the hell you're comfortable with in this new step of your relationship. Picture this:
It's been a few weeks since you two made it official, even though you went through a month of the talking phase. You were flirty, but Chungheop was still shy with you on certain things. Today, the two of you had a fun-filled day at the amusement park. He had been eyeing you with heart eyes all day and you to him as well. It was hard not to, especially when you have a boyfriend as cute as him! As you were driving back to Seoul, the rain came down in buckets but Baron didn't want to go back to the dorms just yet. With cute puppy-eyes he asked you if he could come over to hang out for a few hours. There was absolutely no way for you to resist that.
So here you were, walking back into the living room after changing out of those ridiculously tight skinny jeans and into your pajama shorts. You traded your cute blouse for one of Baron's large shirts. He was lounging on the couch, scrolling through Netflix for something to kill the time with. Nothing was particularly catching his eye though. He didn't have to wait long until you flopped directly next to him and snuggled into his side.
As he took in your attire, his heart was pounding a thousand times a minute. You were too cute! When you two mutually decided on a Rom-Com, he got bored pretty quickly and shyly kissed your cheek.
With a smile, you turned to see him gazing at you. He leaned closer to your lips and hesitated only for a second before closing the distance. Softly, slowly would mold his lips to yours. Chungheop tilted his head to the side, softly exhaling while the arm on the back of the couch comes to the back of your neck.
Won't introduce tongue but will groan when you do it first.
Heavy breathing and a whole lot of gentle caressing.
His fingers slide down your cheek to cup your jaw before trailing to your cleavage only to settle on your hip.
He won't have a tight grip, it's always light but never in the same place for very long - boy has wondering hands.
Typically they're gripping and stroking.
Will quietly groan if you deepen the kiss or start touching his skin (neck, stomach).
His lips aren't ever rough with you
He'll like to take his time tasting you.
He's a nibbler/biter so expect him to bite gently on your lips a few times.
Also he'll pull some freaky moves out of nowhere like sucking on your tongue and smile cheekily when you moan into him.
Likes to keep you on your toes so some times, just to hear you gasp in surprise, he'll throw you on the bed/couch with a playful smirk.
Overall, he’s very sweet to you. “You look so cute like that, baby.”
Ace:
A whole tease. That's it. That's the post.
Jk. But Wooyoung is a big fan of a foreplay, like this is where he thrives!
He knows how to fuck with you too, so he'll initiate the kisses and will make them so fluttering and lingering that you'll be on the verge of trying to smash his lips to yours.
He'll pull away and be like "Uh-uh don't be so impatient, baby. We got all night~"
Might even laugh a little bit if you were getting frustrated with all his teasing.
He's the type to dominate everything about making out but it's in a sensual way (?)
like not rough or aggressive at all.
Will sneak his tongue in to spice it up after a few minutes just to catch you off guard.
Tongue
LOTS AND LOTS OF IT
French kissing
With a lot of moans from him - he’s pretty vocal but he’s not nearly as loud as you
Likes to suck - on any part of skin on your body. He’s not picky
Sloppy kisses since he has less self control than you think he does
He'll pick up the pace only to slow it down again and smile when you make noises into his mouth.
Lives for the moment that you finally break under all the teasing and yank his hair.
Ace likes to catch you off guard a lot so he'll sneak up on you when you're distracted and spin you around just to give you kisses.
He's a romantic at heart so back hugs that turn into making out on the kitchen counter are very common for you two.
Wooyoung wouldn't want to make-out in public spaces but a hello and goodbye peck when he's in disguise is alright.
He'll be mortified if you were in the middle of a heated make out session, his hands slowly creeping up your shirt only for the members to burst in.
He would be soooooo red in the face lol so yeah y'all would have to be ALONE ALONE to have any real freaky time.
Ayno:
(first off, how dare I use this gif)
Has zero self control when it comes to his s/o
As mentioned previously, Ayno is an ass man
So if you want him to jump your bones, just wear a flattering pair of skinny jeans or a tight skirt
He’ll literally follow you around like a puppy
Lots of gulping, narrowed eyes stuck to your hips and ass as you walked in front of him
When it comes to making out, he’s the same way
A kiss is never just one and done
NO MA’AM, he wants all the smoke
He knows you like how his lips are so he goes in for the kill immediately
No build up
He’ll catch your wrist and spin you to face him
As soon as you notice his body pressed into you, his lips are pushing and pulling you to fold into him
Who are you to deny him that?
Doesn’t waste any time with teasing - his tongue is already putting in work
Likes to cradle your head and tilt it up to him
Wants to hear you whimper and moan breathlessly into him
Always likes to break the kiss to stare at you with an intensity that has your blood boiling
But is soooo playful
Might smirk and leave you hanging
Some times he’ll purposefully attack your mouth when you two really shouldn’t be kissing like when you went to his parent’s house
Enjoys the thrill of getting touchy when you guys could be caught any moment
A little bit of an exhibitionist
He’ll tickle you or nuzzle you to cut some of the sexual tension or say something to make you giggle as he’s pressing kisses on your cheeks
Looooves to handle you if you’d let him
REALLY loves when you handle him too!!!
That one time when you pushed him on the couch, straddled him and yanked his hair, he swore that he was in heaven.
He’ll easily submit to you if you want him too
But he’ll make you work for it
Licking your lips, neck
Yoonho will beg you to let him put hickeys on you and when you agree, he’ll jump on you that second
Jacob:
HOt, heavy, messy, passionate all the time with no build up or warning for you at all.
Jacob likes to keep you guessing so he'll initiate a make-out just about damn near everywhere and at any given time.
He honestly doesn't care whose in the room, unless it was like yours or his family.
The members and other staff?
Yeah, doesn't matter - if he wants to kiss you then he will.
If they don't wanna see it, they better leave because he won't stop unless you want him to ;)
Making out isn’t just kissing for him - it’s a prelude to the nasty-ness that’s about to come
So if you try to break the kiss to go answer your phone, he’s thoroughly offended and will drag you back to his lips
The type to walk in, no words, and catch the back of your neck with his large hand
Likes to make out with you against surfaces with him standing up
He’ll tell you he thinks it’s really hot when you wrap your legs around his waist
A bit of a size kink because he loves to corner you and pin you to the wall/bed and hover over you
You...have absolutely no complaints so...
He’s the dominate role even in making out
But just so gentle and loving that it makes you swoon
Rarely makes a sound other than breathing heavily, humming or growling
Face grabbing!!!!!
100% of the time will grind into you
Since his body is always smashed against yours, he doesn’t need to move much for you two to feel the friction
Has a habit of biting his lip and looking to the sky to grab his composure
Likes your attention on him so he’ll grab your jaw
Playful but not as Ayno
Chuckles when he accidentally tickles you but easily refocuses your attention to the matter at hand:
His tongue in your mouth
Lou:
Shy baby won’t initiate any make-outs until later in the relationship
Probably like 3-4 months into it
Doesn’t mean he doesn’t like making out
Exactly the opposite actually
Hosung loves the intimacy of making out with his partner and finds it really romantic
Is very soft about the entire thing
Nearly melts into a puddle when you kiss him out of nowhere, literal hearts in his eyes
Light pecks - just lips pressed against each other the first few seconds then he’ll slowly move and close his eyes
Hardly any freaky shit until he’s more comfortable with you
When he is comfortable, he’s still very sweet and loving but will be a bit of a tease
Likes to pull away from you and watch you chase his lips
Will play innocent when you get upset that he won’t move against you
Makes you work for it ‘cause he’s a bit of a brat
His hand kink will show during make outs
As soon as your hands touch him under his shirt, he’s a mess
Loud, deep groans and sucking his breath
Wants to watch you so he’ll love it when you’re in his lap
Lots of slow, teasing kisses until he can feel you grind into him
“Do that again.”
Knows how deep his voice can get so when he figures out it’s a turn on for you, he won’t shut up
“If you keep kissing me like that, I’ll have to take you in the room.”
“Unless you want me to strip you right here on the couch?”
“Princess, you’re eager hm? Mhm, I like that~”
You try your best to shut him up but the more you do, the more he’ll do also
He doesn’t prefer boobs over ass or vice versa but he tends to find his hands are constantly caressing your ass and waist a lot
Is hardly ever rough with you but will appreciate a few bites and sharp grips from your hands
Ziu:
Playful then turns hot and heavy.
Heejun likes to goof off so making out will start off very innocent.
You two could be just talking and laughing and he'll strike- tickling you and tackling you onto the couch.
Eventually, it'll die down and as you were giggling and telling him he was crushing you under his weight, he'd be too busy staring at you to hear you.
In a split second, he leaned down and gave you a soft kiss - something to convey what he was thinking at the moment.
He had no intentions of going past that but when he felt your arms wrap around his shoulders, thin fingers stroking the back of his neck and down his back, it sends shivers down his spine.
Ziu knows how big he is, and he is very cautious of you as well so he won't be rough with you unless there's a special reason.
Usually, his hands stay on your body, running patterns down your sides but they'll always settle on the swell of your hips or your ass.
He'll definitely man-handle you a bit - pulling you on to him, pushing you into the couch/bed.
Some times he forgets how strong he is so his kisses suddenly turn very passionate, and in turn kind of sloppy.
Open mouth kisses with lots of tongue clashing.
Likes a little bit of pain
Your nails scratching his back, yanking on his hair - as long as there’s no blood
He's pretty vocal, groaning and whispering sweet words in your ear.
Dirty talk is only for rough sex so most times he'll be just a big ball of love and sensual, lingering kisses.
Then, when you want to deepen the kiss, he'll leave you hanging out of literally nowhere and look at you like you're crazy for trying to get freaky in the dorm living room when any of his members could walk in.
"We're not doing any of what you're thinking on this couch, little lady."
Finds it hilarious how sexually frustrated he can get you though, so he'll leave you hanging a lot more than you want lol.
Will probably laugh in your face when you pout and curse him for turning you on with no intention to finish
#vav#vav reaction#vav scenario#st. van#lee geumhyuk#baron#choi chunghyeop#ace#jang wooyoung#ayno#noh yoonho#jacob#jang peng#lou#kim hosung#ziu#park heejun#didn't spell check
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september 2018
there's an estimated forty days left of filming and already, ian's dreading the end. he's been trying harder to enjoy the little moments, and not just be miserable because he knows they won't last forever. it's hard, but he's trying. he's almost never as happy as he is when he's with these people, his fellow losers, and he doesn't want to waste the time he has left with them.
forty days.
probably closer to thirty nine now since it's past midnight. one more day down. but that's something he's not letting himself linger on. instead, his eyes settle on kennedy who is getting his ass kicked in a video game but is still laughing so loud that the sound is filling the entire basement of the rented house. he focuses on that sound and can't help but smile. he focuses on it and he swears every sad thought in his head floats away, just like that.
he accepted earlier in the summer that his feelings for kenny weren't as platonic as he had originally thought. but in his defense, he was only twelve when they first met. he had a lot of figuring out to do.
he's figured it out now.
he loves all his friends, strongly and deeply, and he's a little co-dependent with more than a couple of them. if he goes a day without talking to evan, he genuinely misses him. he goes out of his way to visit the burgess' at every given chance. each member of the cast has expressed annoyance with the way he spams the group chat while they're all asleep. he's entirely convinced he needs june to survive. and he feels all that with kenny, too, so it took him some time to realize just how much more he felt. and how he felt things for him that went well beyond the things he felt for everyone else he loved.
he doesn't get an overwhelming urge to lean in and kiss any of his other friends when they get too close, for starters. that was a big tip off for ian.
kenny jokingly winked at him once and he felt like someone had lit him on fire.
he constantly found himself shoving others aside just to stand by him in group photos or to sit by him on a couch during a movie.
his own behavior should have been a giveaway right away, but he's not exactly very experienced in that area. not in just dating, but even with liking people. he's only really had one real crush before, and he'd been twelve. and he'd never liked one of his guy friends before either - but he'd accepted that fact easily. given how many male tv characters he'd been infatuated with over the years, and his long-standing secret harry styles obsession that started back when he was ten years old, he'd always suspected he wasn't totally straight. he still hasn't slapped a label on himself yet, but he doesn't think he needs to know for sure what he is to know that he definitely has feelings for kenny.
feelings that are so intense that sometimes he can't even think about anything else. feelings that are so all-consuming that all he wants to talk about 24/7 is kenny and he has to force himself, multiple times a day, to shut up about him or else he'll give himself away or let too much slip. and he knows better than to say anything, to kenny, or to anyone.
but god he wants to.
he's kept this feeling bottled up for months now, though it feels like so much longer, and sometimes he feel like he's gonna burst from how bad he wants to talk about it. his journal only has so many pages he can wax poetic about kenny onto, and he's sure even the inanimate object is sick of hearing about his crush. he needs a pair of real ears. and maybe someone to tell him he's not stupid or crazy for falling for his best friend. because boy oh boy does he feel like he is sometimes.
evan's loud hooping and hollering covers up the sound of kenny's laughter, and ian rolls his eyes but can't help but grin in amusement. his victory had been predicted since mid-game, but evan was still celebrating like he'd done something impressive.
in an attempt to show kenny support, ian raises his arm and gives evan and his win a thumbs down. "booooooo."
he gets two middle fingers raised at him for his efforts. he thinks that's all he's getting in return for voicing his disapproval, until evan drops the controller and comes flying past the gaming area, past the couch, and leaping onto ian where he's sprawled across a huge bean bag chair.
"hey, i wanted to play the winner!" jeremy shouts from the couch in front of the tv, where the other four teenagers had been sat, partially watching the game, partially on their phones, mostly having their own conversations.
ian easily could have squeezed in with them, but he couldn't resist a good bean bag. plus, he was closer to the little mini bar area that this place had. the bar itself wasn't stocked with alcohol, not that ian cares or jeremy's mom would have let them drink anyway, but she kept the shelves and mini fridge stocked. ian likes being close to the snacks.
"well i'm over here now!" evan yells back. the loud volume right in ian's ear makes him wince. "play the loser. kenny, that's you. you're the loser."
ian shoves evan off of him and onto the floor. "dick."
"no," evan says, rejecting his removal from the chair. "move your ass."
"no." but he does it anyway. he can't move much or else he'd be on the floor, because yes it's a big seat, but they're both months away from being sixteen and are not the same small twelve year olds they'd been when they first met. they've hit massive growth spurts since then. sharing small spaces isn't as easy as it once was, but it doesn't stop them from trying. evan ends up with one of his legs completely over ian's and their shoulders pressed together. ian lets it happen, but he's still mildly annoyed about it. "wow, this is so comfortable. i'm so glad you came all the way over here to dig your elbow into my stomach. feels great."
"are you saying you don't want to sit with me, you a**hole?" evan asks.
evan's elbow digs deeper into his side and ian's pretty sure it's on purpose. he grimaces and shifts as much as he can but still doesn't move out of the seat.
"that's literally exactly what i'm saying, yeah. you stink."
the bickering continues, because it never really ends with them. there's an almost constant flow of jokes and jabs between them. but for as much as they give each other sh*t, him and evan have definitely had their fair share of genuine moments between them. anytime ian has an anxiety attack in a group setting, evan's one of a few who knows how to calm him. ian's called him crying about his family or about wanting to go home more than once. there was also the time on set during their first movie together where after an intense, emotional scene, they'd both cried and hugged each other until they got it out of their system. sometimes his relationship with evan reminds him of his relationship with his sister, and the way they can pick and pick at each other, but at the end of the day, they'd die for one another.
it's just really fun to insult each other, so they do it often.
eventually, after evan shouts at ian to eat an ass, they're informed they're being too loud.
anna, the only girl in a group of boys, shushes them with so much aggression that it terrifies ian a little. she puts up with so much nonsense every time she hangs out with them, he's just waiting for the day she finally snaps. he knows he doesn't want it to be his fault, so he does as he's told and shushes.
"they're all haters," evan mutters.
ian nods. "they wanna be us so bad."
and just like that, they're on the same team again.
ian feels a vibration against his leg and realizes his phone's fallen under his thigh. as he digs it out, he sees evan's own attention has momentarily returned to the game on the tv just as the loading screen transitions back into gameplay, so he feels less bad about checking it. reading kenny's name on his screen, he visibly lights up, grinning at the text.
'if he's being a dick, come escape and play me next,' kenny has written.
ian quickly types back. 'he's not, but i might anyway. wanna be next to kick your ass.'
he glances across the room, but he can't see kenny at all where he's sitting on the floor in front of the couch, so he has no idea if he's grinning as big as ian is just from seeing a new text from him. he can't imagine he is, but it's still a nice thought. as soon as the round on the tv ends and the loading screen is back up, kenny starts typing.
'I THINK I'M WINNING THIS TIME.'
ian's smile widens, his cheeks sore from it, but he doesn't get a chance to start replying before -
"is it a meme?" evan asks, neck craning to look. ian clicks back to his homescreen quickly.
"is what a meme?"
evan slumps back a little once ian drops his phone to his lap. "whatever you were staring at like that."
"no, or - yeah." he answers, then changes his answer when he realizes he can't tell him what he was actually grinning at.
he wasn't as subtle as he had hoped.
"you lookin' at something nasty?" evan asks. "you fvcking freak?"
ian blinks, then deadpans, "yes. i'm looking at something nasty while surrounded by my friends. with you practically in my lap. you caught me."
"thought so. looking like a blushing school girl over here." that one's a little too close to home considering he feels like a smitten school girl every time he sees or talks to kenny, so ian shoves evan for it. he almost rolls over the edge of the seat but gets a palm on the ground to steady himself. "come on. seriously. what was it? what's so secret?"
"fvck, you're nosy."
"invested in your life," evan corrects him.
"nosy," ian insists.
evan gives him a look, a raised brow and a silent dude, come on, tell me, and ian takes a breath.
he reminds himself there's a reason he's kept this secret so under wraps. as much as he wants to scream from the rooftop how much he likes kenny, the risk of him finding out isn't worth it. he'd ruin not only their friendship, but probably the entire group. they'd never be able to all be together. not with kenny inevitably being weirded out by ian's crush, and ian being too mortified to be around him anymore. the rest of filming would be a nightmare. getting through press and the promotion would be torture. he'd lose his favorite person.
nothing good could possibly come from people knowing.
then, he reminds himself this is evan. they may thrive off of giving each other sh*t, but he can trust him. he's never let him down before. not when it mattered. if there's anyone he can tell and trust they won't screw him over by letting it slip, he feels like it's evan.
if for no other reason than he'd suffer, too. not just because ian would never forgive him, but he'd hate it if the group dynamic was thrown out of wack, too.
evan feels like a safe place to finally be honest.
so he exhales, and speaks.
"it was a - i was looking at something from - it's a someone."
a bit of a rocky start, but he got where he was trying to go after a few attempts.
"you have a someone?" evan asks, seeming mildly offended that this isn't information he was already privy to. "someone i don't know about?"
"i don't really have someone," ian tells him. "i just... want to. i want to be with them."
"who is she?"
"it's..." ian's voice is barely a whisper at this point. "it's not a girl..."
the silence that follows is the longest, most anxiety inducing silence ian has ever experienced. it can't be more than twenty seconds, probably not even that long, before evan speaks again but it feels like a lifetime. he doesn't know why he's so nervous about the reaction to this. he knows evan well enough to know he won't care, but people can be surprising in the worst ways sometimes. and he's never done this before. he's pretty sure his sister has an inkling, but he's never come out and admitted it to her. this is the first time he's having the actual conversation and god it's fvcking terrifying. he kind of wants to cry suddenly but he's really holding himself together.
even while fearing and preparing himself for the worst, he mostly expects evan to react with some generic but kind sentiment. a that's okay with me, dude or an i love and accept you, pal.
that's not what he gets.
after a moment, evan's brow furrows, his head tilts just slightly, and he asks, as sincere as can be, "man, is it me?"
it's just what ian needs to hear to ease his tension. he throws his head back and lets out a cackle. the ache in his stomach is no longer due to nerves, but from how hard he's laughing. "absolutely fvcking -" he has to stop, pausing as he got through another fit of laughter. "oh, absolutely fvcking not."
a tear rolls down his cheek and he flicks it away as he finally starts to calm down. then he gets a good look at how unamused evan looks and it sets him off again.
"okay, it's not me, i got it!" evan says in a hushed whisper, just loud enough to be heard over the sound of ian's own laughter. "who is it then?"
the nerves are back, suddenly. and again, he doesn't even know why. he wants this. he wants to be able to talk to someone about his feelings. he wants evan to know. but his palms are still sweating.
"you can't tell him," ian says softly. "i'll literally strangle you. you have to swear."
"i swear," he assures him. "so it's someone i know?"
he's pretty sure evan knows everyone ian knows. even his few remaining guy friends from back home, evan's met. but he doesn't remind him of that now, just nods and confirms. "yeah. it's someone you know."
"who? i'm not gonna tell, ian."
nervously, he glances towards the couch, just to make sure the game was still being played and their entire group of friends hadn't turned around to stare and listen to his confession. all he sees are the backs of heads, and he can hear everyone's laughter mixed with anna's muffled trash talk as she has a go at the game. no one's paying attention to him except for evan.
for some reason, he's having a hard time looking at him. the hardest part is already over, he tells himself, just spit his name out. but he's also telling himself that it's not too late and he can keep this secret to himself. evan would be annoyed about the cliffhanger, but ian could deal with that easier than he could deal with other possible outcomes of telling him.
no. he's doing this.
suck it the fvck up.
with his eyes on the back of the couch, in the smallest voice possible, he admits, "kenny."
he doesn't know what evan's initial reaction is, because it takes a few seconds for him to finally meet his eyes again, but when he does look at him again, his face isn't easy to read. he doesn't look shocked, exactly - and really, given that ian is arguably closest to kenny and evan out of everyone, it probably wasn't the most surprising name he could have said. if anything, he looks... confused?
"you're not gonna tell him, are you?" ian asks, misreading the look as inner turmoil about not wanting to keep a secret from their other best friend.
that's not at all what it is.
"no, i said i'm not," evan huffs. "but, why the fvck is it not me?"
"i'm - i'm sorry?" ian says, because what else does he say to that? "are you offended that i don't have a crush on you?"
"am i not cute?"
"evan, this isn't how people are supposed to react to sh*t like this -"
"i just can't believe out of everyone - kenny." he whispers it, at least. "and not me? really?"
"i'd love it if you weren't so fvcking weird about this."
"i'm not being weird! it being me just would have made sense, is all i'm saying."
ian squints. "and it being kenny doesn't make sense?"
evan sighs, falling back into the chair a little. "yeah, i guess it does. it does."
"just to make sure - " ian says, putting a hand up. "you don't - i mean, you're not upset because you like - "
"ew, don't even say it. i don't like you."
it's ian's turn to sigh and lean back into the seat. "okay, cool. you're just... fvcking weird. that's good to know."
there's a moment of silence and ian just breathes. he did it. he did it and nothing's changed, nothing world shattering happened. he feels like a weight's been lifted, just by telling one person. it feels really good. even if it didn't go how he'd have imagined it to. still good.
"knew it couldn't have been a meme you were looking at," evan says a minute later. "the memes you send are never that funny."
ian scoffs. "fvck you. i send the funniest memes."
"willow sends the funniest memes."
"you're gonna go to hell for saying sh*t like that. lying is a fcking sin."
"is it?"
ian pauses.
"... i'm not sure. i think so. did neither of us go to church growing up? that kind of explains a lot."
there's an angry cry from the front of the room that draws their attention. anna curses, followed by kenny laughing. once again, ian smiles at the sound.
the laughter, not the cursing.
"did kenny actually win?!" evan shouts over to the rest of the group.
kenny and anna stand up as the other three perk up on the couch to look over at the two in the bean bag.
"i've been winning!" kenny calls back.
jeremy chimes in. "he's on a winning streak!"
"more like a cheating streak," anna mumbles.
"he's beaten everyone except evan," jeremy says.
"ahem!" evan waves a hand, gesturing to ian. "not everyone except evan. let ian at him."
ian tries to suppress his grin. he'd been so worried about the bad outcomes of telling evan, but he hadn't considered all the good reasons. like evan helping him get closer to kenny. even just in little ways, like playing video games. maybe this was a better idea than he thought.
he meets kenny's eyes and when kenny smiles at him, he can't hide his own anymore.
"ian?" kenny asks. "you want the winner?"
evan nudges ian in the side, winking at him as they make eye contact and calling out to kenny, "yeah, he does."
on second thought, he might end up regretting it.
#◦ ` ・ writing : all the glamour and the trauma and the fucking melodrama#◦ ` ・ writing : hold me closer tiny bastard#◦ ` ・ writing#◦ ` ・ mine
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ok my grand idea for a fic came to me when listening to Harry Styles’ album...basically Harry Potter writes the songs on this album and sings them and I can’t write so i’m just gonna give all the details for it without putting the work in
(feel free to write something with this)
- eighth year (because, duh)
- hermione plans an inter-house unity party
- everyone picks a slip of parchment out of a hat and they have to do what the slip says at the party (things like wear fishnet tights, or only talk in an american accent, or show your favorite spell in front of everyone, or challenge someone to a duel but you can only use first-year defense spells)
- she rigs it because she’s a sneaky bitch but she doesn’t know what each slip will say
- basically, everyone has to do something that they’re afraid of but if they don’t, there’s a punishment at the bottom of each slip
- (ron’s slip finally gets him to ask hermione to move in with him after hogwarts)
- harry reads his slip and freaks the fuck out because “hermione what the hell you’re going to make me fucking SING in front of all of them??? sing songs that I wrote????? in front of MALFOY and all of the slytherins who are no doubt going to make my life miserable for it????”
- hermione is like oh shit I thought you would just have to tell everyone you were bi finally
- fast forward to the party and harry is sweating and so nervous and he hasnt shown anyone his songs BUT hermione because she pestered him to after they saw his slips and the songs made her cry
- they’re in the room of requirement which gives each student an easier way to perform their “dare”
- ron asks hermione, she says yes, then she tells him in front of everyone that she has a fantasy that the two of them fuck in the restricted section, ron goes bright red, blaise zabini screams “oh FUCK yes,” seamus slaps ron on the back and says “congrats, mate! make sure you don’t get any...bodily fluids on the books or they’ll start screaming and pince will come out and see you with your dick out”
- everyone wonders why seamus knows this, he gears up, pulls his slips out, a soapbox appears, he steps up, clears his throat, and in his best professor snape voice, says, “i, seamus finnegan, instead of attending the halloween feast in fifth year, snuck into the restricted section and wanked over a potions book by the name of, ‘Love Erotica,’ which informs the reader all about love potions. not only do you get new information on how to spot a love potion, but you also get to see potions that make breasts grow double the size...with pictures. madam pince found 15 year old me with my dick out over a drawing of tits. thank you, and 1,000 points from gryffindor to being a nasty and horrid child.”
- he bowed, the whole room went crazy, and seamus was known as the wank king for the rest of the year
- meanwhile, draco is going around to apologizing to everyone in the room who he had wronged BUT he had to finish with harry
- right as draco is gearing up to go to harry, harry steps up onto a mini stage, pulls out the guitar he found in sirius’ old room, sits on a stool, casts a mild sonorus over the guitar and his voice, and says “er, hi. my slip told me I had to sing and play some songs for you guys, and I, um, I wrote some of them this summer and finished some a couple of weeks ago..”
- everyone is staring at him wide-eyed and in shock (draco especially) hermione is smiling and has tears in her eyes
- “alright, er, I'm gonna start” harry looks up to see draco near the stage, and he starts to play
- “And oh we started Two hearts in one home It's hard when we argue We're both stubborn I know, but oh
Sweet creature, sweet creature Wherever I go, you bring me home Sweet creature, sweet creature When I run out of road, you bring me home”
- everyone is shocked because harry has a soft, but husky voice and it pulls you in. no one knew he was musically talented
- draco is absolutely in awe and you can see how he feels so obviously by the look in his face
- harry finishes, everyone claps and shouts, hes bright red, ron is thumping him on the back, hermione is hugging him and telling him how proud she is, but draco is just stuck and he cant stop staring because harry is so so beautiful and how did he not realize this sooner
- harry steps up and says he has one more song to sing because his slip said he had to sing the two songs he was most nervous about
- everyone wonders why he sang sweet creature, he blushes, then everyone is trying to figure out who its about
- he starts to sing a more upbeat song called “medicine”
- “Tingle running through my bones, fingers to my toes Tingle running through my bones The boys and the girls are in I mess around with him And I'm okay with it I’m coming down, I figured out I kinda like it And when I sleep I’m gonna dream of how you tasted If you go out tonight, I’m going out ‘cause I know you’re persuasive You got that something, I got me an appetite; now I can taste it We're getting dizzy, oh, we're getting dizzy, oh La la la la la You get me dizzy, oh, you get me dizzy, oh”
- everyone is dancing, draco is stuck on “I mess around with him and I'm okay with it”
- pansy comes up beside draco and yells out “hey potter! did you just come out?”
- harry looks up sheepishly and says “uh, sort of”
- pansy says “gay?”
- “no, bisexual”
- “nice, me too”
- everyone loses their shit because two of their classmates just came out as bisexual when everyone thought they were 100% straight
- draco thinks ‘fuck it’ and rushes up to harry, apologizes for being a dickwad to him for the past 7 years, tells him he has an amazing talent and...
- “potter you’re the most beautiful fucking person I've ever seen” and proceeds to kiss him
- everyone is silent
- they break apart and instead of looking shocked harry says “finally figured it out, huh? I've been flirting with you all year and you dont seem to be able to get it through your thick skull. which song gave it away? I wrote them both with you in mind.”
- hermione squeals, pansy and blaise are like “what the fuck what the fuck draco how did you not know he was flirting with you it was so fucking obvious you fucking idiot”
- draco is like “I didnt even realize I was gay until 10 minutes ago!”
- “you fucking idiot weve known since you were 12 and wouldnt stop talking about potter”
- everyone is still losing their shit and I dont even remember where I was going with this I think it was a fever dream
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Ant-Nimagus:
Summary: Azkaban delinquent turned ant-nimagus
House: Slytherin
Species: Human (Ant-nimagus)
Blood Status: Half-blood
Wand: Cecropioa, 6 inches, doxie antenna core
Patronus: Carpenter ant
Broom: Custom job, by Professor Hank Pym
Specialties: Transfiguration, flying
Familiars: Antony, Ulysses S. Gr-ant, Ant-tonio Banderas, Marie Ant-toinette, the Grand Duchess Antnastasia, Ant-ie Em...
Sorting:
Scott was a toughie. He's got strong traits of every house, so the Hat had to sort him by process of elimination.
Scott was a chillax, open-minded, sociable family-guy, which screams Hufflepuff to many. And his motivation for his crimminal activity was to fight the wealthy corrupt corporations and defend the "little guys." That sounds like a Hufflepuff crimminal... but Scott really struggles to stay loyal and hard-working and responsible. Just because he's he's a chill friendly dude who love his kid and looks like Justin-Finch Fletchly doesn't make him a Hufflepuff.
His crimminal history might say Gryffindor to others, since he recklessly broke the law for his percieved values. But Scott leaps back out of bad situations as qiuckly as he leaps into them. And in any case, his fighting style is too sneaky and dodgy to be Gryffindor. (If simply being any kind of "brave" got you into Gryffindor, this whole series would get boring fast.)
Scott's sneaky and crafty specialties would serve him well in Ravneclaw, and Ravenclaws can certainly be reckless. But if Hank Pym just needed a Ravenclaw to be the Ant-nimagus, he wouldn't have had to look as far as Scott.
The Hat knows it's a stereotype for crooks to be Slytherins. But the fact is, Scott Lang's biggest strength is his cunning, and his biggest weakness is resisting the urge to do what he wants. He may not seem particularly "ambitious," but leading illegal heists is pretty ambitious, and so is trying to leave a lifetime of crime to become a good father.
Story:
You want Scott Lang's Hogwarts story, in a concise, summed-up nutshell?
Sure, no problem!
(Bongos)
Scottie starts his wizarding school at Ilvermorny and he's this super-chill guy who's friends with everybody except the assholes and breaks all the rules, and he's into flying and has crazy dark hair like an American Harry Potter, only without the glasses or the lightning-bolt scar or the get-out-of-trouble-free-card-cuz-you're-the-Boy-Who-Lived coupons, so when he teams up with three other pranksters from different parts of the wizarding world he's all like "Hey I'm Scottie wanna go rob Gringotts and be rich crooks and stuff?" I'm all like "yeah man count me in even though I'm going to like a whole other school in Mexico, and our other friend Kurt is from Durmstrang all the way over in Europe, but we coordinated with our owls and made this kickass heist. But we weren't doing it for the money!
That's a lie.
We did do it mostly for the money.
But we were gonna give some of that money to the muggle-borns and half-breeds and all those oppressed peoples. But still keep enough to have a castle in the Bahamas. We were like Robin Hood. And then we get caught and we all go to Azkaban and get expelled and Scottie's like 'WTF why does that dork Harry Potter get to fly a car into the Whomping Willow and enter a tournament underage and sh*t and it's okay, but we rob one little volt from some trolls and we're expelled?" and the Ministry of Magic is like "Shut up your magical careers are OVER muchachos!" And they broke all our wands in half. And then Scottie's wife divorced him, so when they broke his wand it was like a symbolism of Scottie's life being broken in half and being separated from his "other half."
Wife? Yeah, Scott was married....
Family:
Yeah, so Scottie he was married. Yeah, he's still a teenager at wizard school. Yep, he's got a kid, who's walking and talking. No, no, it's not weird! See I'll explain, real quick....
(Bongos)
So Scott's this impulsive teenager who does the nasty while he's still in high school, and the nasty is a blond classmate named Maginhilde La Fey, who goes by Maggie. Only Maggie's like half Nymph right? So like two days after her and Scott are rolling around under the Quodpod bleachers she's all "Hey asshole I'm five months pregnant!" and Scott's like "WTF? Oh sh*t you're part fairy-person so our baby's gonna age super fast! Let's get married real quck so this isn't weird." But then we do that heist stuff and he's in Azkaban and Maggie divorces him. So then Scott wants to change his ways and go straight to be a good dad to his kid, whose named Casseiopia, Cassy for short.
I'm outta breath, can I get some water?
Ant-Nimagus:
* A note from the editors: Our narrator has been given a glass of water, and a sedative, so as to make the story more accessable to an audience that isn't on Speed. You may continue, Mr. Luis.
Okay, awesome.
(Slightly slower bongos)
So this Professor Hank Pym used to work at Ilvernorny, but quit because Howard Stark was an asshole. So now he's at Hogwarts and he's head of Ravenclaw House. And he's thinking, "Harry Potter's retired and the Order of the Avengers are all off their meds and dropping castles out of the sky and stuff, the world needs the Ant-Nimagus again! But I can be the Ant-nimagus anymore. Look at me, I'm like a hundred!"
(A note from Professor Pym: "I'm 74, thankyou very much.) "
Who do I train to be the new Ant-nimmagus? I have this ex-student guy named Darren Cross, who's this buff handsome Gryffindor, and everyone would think he'd be the hero, and he thinks he's supposed to be the hero, but his mind is all corrupt and evil so scratch him out. The Ant-nimagus has gotta be more humble and smarter than a Gryffindor, but he can't be just a boring Ravenclaw, no I need someone who can break rules...."
So Pym, who's this genius Ravenclaw type, deduces that he needs a Slytherin to do his bidding. So he sets up a trap inside Hogwarts for a group of Slytherins who think they're gonna pull some big school prank by stealing an Invisibility Cloak. But Scott unwraps it and "WTF? I can see this cloak just fine, this ain't no Invisibiilyt Cloak. Imma try it on." And then suddenly he's tiny and has an extra pair of arms, and he freaks out, but Pym changes his mind with his ants, who are like his minions, and they bring tea nad sugar over across the table for Scott--
Ant-nimagus. Sorry, right.
The Ant-nimagus is, I guess, like a normal animagus, only with size-changing powers. So he can turn into an ant, but he can be a normal ant-sized ant, or a giant "Them!" ant. And he can also be a tiny human, or a normal sized human or a giant. And the cloak is more just for magical protection, it just mixes badly if someone who isn't an animagus tries wearing it. So Pym trains Scottie, and Scott's doing this kinda Han Solo and Princess Leia thing with Pym's daughter Hope, who's all "I'm not attracted to you, I'm a walking Ravenclaw stereotype, look at my hair, I'm all buisiness, but damn if I wanna kiss you" and they all fight an evil Gryffindor on a wizard chess board, and it's really badass! And Scott's finally redeemed himself and got his kid back, and his ex-wife and her snotty Prefect husband are his friends and his kid has a giant pet ant and it's all happy but then Captain America comes in--
Uncivil Quidditch Match:
(Bongos)
--and goes "Yo, be on my team in this totally unauthorized Quidditch match, I'm not drunk!" Scottie, he's all, "Sir, this is an honor, even though I'm a Slytherin and you're a Gryffindor. I hero-worship you man, cuz you stick up for the little guy. We are totally breaking the stereotype here, with a Slytherin gushing over a Gryffindor, and then going on to troll another Slytherin for said Gryffindor! Hey Stark, I'm your conscience! Or your sex life or whatever the funny line was. I'm Team Cap's answer to your snarky antihero!" But then Stark's like "psych, I win, you're all in a giant squid detention now. Only I feel bad about it, but I only feel bad about Sam, Wanda and Clint; you I'm just gonna kind a go 'Who are you again?' so you can do the Star Lord 'why does no one know about me and my badass exploits?' thing."
So Scott gets out of the squid and takes a plea deal so he doesn't go back to Azkaban, he just has to do community service and stay in his commonroom on all his off hours. And Hope and Hank are pissed, cuz they're like "You think we're proud of you for being a dumbass for Captain America? Everyone only loves that guy if his name's in the movie's title. This is an 'Ant-Man' movie, Gary Stu got no power here! So we're through with you." So then Scott has to redeem himself again, and he does! But then the whole Pym family gets dusted, and the giant ant plays the drum set, so we have to wait till 'Avengers 4' to see how Scott's gonna save all their asses and redeem himself again.
Endgame:
(Final round of bongos)
So just before Thanos’s dusting spell, Ant-Man and the Wasp and the Old Ant-Man and the Old-Wasp wanna help their new ghost friend Ava Starr, and they’re all “Scotty, go to the Spirit Realm and get some Ectoplasm for our ghostly friend” and Scott’s like “WTF is ectoplasm?” and his girlfriend’s like “Ghost sh*t.” And Scott’s like “Screw that I ain’t touching no ghost manure!” But then his girlfriend’s mom goes “Just think of it like ghost-honey.”
So Scott goes to the Spirit Realm and OH SNAP, the whole Pym/Van Dyne family is Dusted! So Scott’s stuck there for the whole summer, until one of the Weasley family rats named Scabbers the Fourteenth nibbles him free, and then POOF he’s back out!
His half-nymph daughter has had another fairy growth spurt over the three months and is now the same age as her dad, which is awkward. And her mom and stepdad are dust, which is depressing. And me and Scotty’s other two friends are also dust, so he makes our ashes into cute little memorials with our faces drawn in.
Scott hears what happened with Thanos, and also that Thanos destroyed all of the Time Turners in the world. But then Scott tells the Avengers how the Spirit Realm can be used for time travel. So Tony Stark, Bruce Banner/Professor Wolf, Rocket Raccoon/Niffler Hybrid, and Princess Shuri all brainstorm in a lab until they get it to work.
Scott and Tony put their Slytherin brains together and try to out-cunning Loki in the past, but they get distracted by America’s ass, and Scott does some damage to Tony’s hole, and Loki gets away with the Tesseract. Then Scott’s mad at Tony, and Tony and Steve are mad at each other, but they’re also all mushy for each other, and Scott’s like “Get a room!” So they yeet off to the 1970s and Scott goes to eat a taco, but loses it.
Then, the final Battle of Hogwarts! Finally, Scott thinks, I can do the badass thing we’ve all been waiting for! Imma go up Thanos’s ass! But fun fact: Titans don’t have assholes. Which means they’re always constipated, which might be why Thanos is such a jerk. (He’s an asshole cuz he doesn’t have an asshole.) So Scott just kicks ass as a giant ant, and is reunited with his girlfriend and all his friends.
Wand, Broom, etc:
Scott's wand is carved from the Cecrepoia, a rainforest tree that carpenter ants tend to live in. His ant-themed broom can shrink and grow with the rest of him, but he may sometimes lose it in the chaos of a fight and have to improvise with something else, like one of the wingged keys. Scott relies on the ants to deliver his mail, and is growing to hate owls, who he often calls "murderers!" when they eat his ant familiars out of the air during missions.
Notes: Scott came out looking like a "Fairly Odd-Parents" character, for some reason. Oh well. Gotta be honest, sorting Scott into Slytherin had a lot to do with his interactions with other characters. I really loved the idea of Pym hiring Scott as a Ravenclaw logically deducing that he needs a Slytherin. And a Slytherin teaming up with a famous Gryffindor hero, and sneaking into a fellow Slytherin's broom to troll the crap out of him. Among other things, a sad consequence of Rowling's House stereotyping was the missed opportunity of all the great Slytherin vs. Slytherin interactions there could have been.
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I GOT YOU A REQUEST so it’s madzier and max beats richie’s ass in street fighter and he’s like who tf is madmax and he sees max and he’s got like heart eyes and stuff and it’s freaking adorable
i haven’t written anything straight since i was 12 so,,, i hope this is good. i’m sorry this took so long! madzier is a blessed ship: here we go
- so richie is new to Hawkins, he moved there the summer before eleventh grade- and max is also new- they’re both just skateboarding video game playing nerds, so they both find themselves hanging out at the skate park and the local arcade; literally every SINGLE DAY- they never see each other though, because max goes to the arcade late, while richie goes in the morning - they both LOVE street fighter, it’s their number one game choice- richie is A GOD AT STREET-FIGHTER- he has had the top score for 3 solid weeks now- he doesn’t notice the name “mad max” two spots below him until one FATEFUL SUNDAY NIGHT- he had been forced to go to church that morning and then clean his room, so he hadn’t made it to the arcade till almost 6 - he walks in ready to play a nasty game of street-fighter (or 6) and makes his way to his favorite game in the corner, just to have his eyes widen in shock at the LEADERBOARD - the amazing “trashmouth” had been moved one place down, a new name taking over the high score slot- “who the fuck is mad max? i’m gonna beat his ass!” - “i heard my name,”- richie spins around and comes face to face with AN ANGEL- she’s clad in black skinny jeans and a yellow sweatshirt, dirty green vans on her feet- she also has the MOST MAGNIFICENT RED HAIR IN THE WHOLE WORLD AND RICHIE THINKS HES GOING TO DIE- “holy fuck, ur mad max?” - “uh yeah, now are u gonna move over and let me play or….” - and richie just scrambles and holds his arm towards the game and nods frantically,,,, he’s a MESS- he’s so blushy and has MAJOR HEART EYES because wow,,,, max is so pretty,,, and she’s been here everyday and he didn’t even know,,, and she has a skateboard! she’s cooler than him!!! - they become best friends that night, arguing over street-fighter and laughing their asses off- they skate back to their houses, finding they’re only a block away from each other- after that they hang out every single day, skating at the skate park, constantly taking the first place slot from each other at the arcade, eating ice cream from the local diner and smoking cigarettes behind richies house and stealing kisses every once in a while- max steals richies clothes ALL THE TIME!!! u know they have the weirdest most crazy styles together and they’re just,,, the cutest couple - u know richie buys her a new skateboard for her birthday and it’s FUCKING SICK,, it says mad max on it and she’s just swooning- richie literally never stops having heart eyes for her and he can’t believe they’re together and she’s his because she is P E R F E C T - (she can’t believe they’re together either,,, she’s so lucky,,, just bad at expressing feelings) - they walk into Hawkins high school on the first day hand in hand - “see you later, trashmouth”- “can’t wait, mad max”- and they KISS AND LOVE EACH OTHER AND DO SKATE TRICKS TOGETHER AND GO ON ARCADE DATES AND LISTEN TO NEW ROCK ALBUMS EVERY WEEKEND AND SMOKE A LOT AND GO SKINNY DIPPING AND SNEAK OUT OF THEIR HOUSES EVERY NIGHT TO GO ON LATE NIGHT WALKS AND THEY LOVE EACH OTHER SO FUCKING MUCH!!!!! GOD - (also they definitely meet the Party, and mike is like WHY DO YOU LOOK LIKE ME????? and el and max become best friends and will and mike are dating and dustin and lucas LOV RICHIE and thinks he’s so funny and they all go on adventures)- (max and richie definitely go to the snowball together, don’t fight me) - (max goes home with richie to Maine on spring break and she meets the losers and ITS SO!!!! GOOD!!!! he and bev love EACH OTHER !!!!!! STAN IS OBSESSED!!!! THEY LOVE EACH OTHER!!!! )- okay i have so many ideas now,,, fucking hell
hope you enjoyed this!!! it got really CRAZY! love you so much taylor!!!
#it 2017#stranger things#crossover#st it crossover#madzier#richie tozier#mad max#max mayfield#headcanon#it headcanons#stranger things headcanons#writing#leah writes#ask#answered
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protect ~ zach herron
requested: yes
This is going to sound morbid but the reader is in a car with the boys on the way to the mall. The reader is dating Zach and on the way to the mall, a semi hits the car but Zach catches it in time to shield the reader and them he and maybe another boy or two go into a coma while the others just have some big cuts or something. The reader is the on!y one uninjured because of Zach. You can play around with it, I have just had this idea for a while but am uncreative and can't write. Thanks
summary: (y/n) goes through the aftermath of the car with her & the boys inside of it being hit by a truck, leaving her the only one of seven unscathed
warning(s): car accident, cursing
word count: 1886
author’s note: ok so @maggie-the-book-nerd i know you’ve been thinking about this for a while so i hope that it’s what you expect. it took me a while to get out there, i know, but i tried my best to write what you’ve asked of me. honestly, i think that you should start writing! if you’re creative enough to have this amazing idea, then you are creative enough to write. i’ve been writing for a couple years now, but this account is my first time publishing. i read so many different stories to help me develop a style of writing and i think that you could be a really great writer! idk i just hope you take that into consideration, because this was a really great idea:)) and also i’m very morbid too lol
The sounds of sirens filled my ears as I dared not open my eyes. Sounds of screaming, whining, and flames filed into my ears and i couldn’t help but cry out, trying to figure out what was going on. my brain scrambled through the anxiety attack that was bound to happen as i struggled to determine what had just happened.
i laughed and climbed into the backseat of the large car that daniel had purchased. jonah had already claimed shotgun, so i was now stuck in the middle seat of the car (due to my height being the shortest) as Zach sat to the left of me and jack sat to the right of me. corbyn and christina had claimed the back seats, probably because they wanted to sleep. christina had just flown in from in new york and corbyn just really liked sleeping.
“where are we going first, babe?” zach turned to face me as he questioned the first stop on our outing to the mall. it was originally supposed to be just christina and i, since we never get alone time together, but this was a perfect example of that. the boys caught wind and after both zach and corbyn decided to come, the other social-lifeless boys decided to come along and that’s how we ended up like this.
“forever 21, of course” i tell him and he laughs, “i’ve been looking for a skirt. like a jean skirt or something and they’ve got cute ones”
“you’d look so good in one of those!” christina gushed, “you totally should get one”
“it’s just a skirt” corbyn commented, “i can’t believe you guys actually have wish lists when you go shopping. like you could seriously have a list that long”
“ok well it’s different because we go in for a few things, but then there are a million other cute things in the store and if they’re on sale, it’s even better” Christina explained to him and I laughed.
“girls are complicated”
“whatever” i kissed the rosy cheek of my boyfriend who smiled and then pecked my lips.
“could someone please remove me from love birds over here?” jack faked a disgusted expression.
“get yourself a girlfriend and you wouldn’t feel that way” i played with my best friend.
“oh shut up, (y/n)” he stuck his tongue out at me, “it’s not as easy as you think”
“it was pretty easy for me” i shrug, interlocking hands with my beautiful boyfriend of nearly eight months now.
“that’s because you had me to introduce you!” jack reminded me and i giggle.
i shook my head, “yeah, yeah. whatever”
the rest of the idiots in the car laughed at our conversation and i looked up at zach with a wide smile. suddenly, i felt two arms pushing me out and towards jack as a screeching sound came loudly, making my arms tingle and my hairs stick up. a loud crashing sound was heard and my eyes instinctively closed.
i was still in shock as i blocked out the sounds of the crowded emergency room waiting room. there were kids screaming, people crying, doctors talking, and other sounds that i really didn’t need to hear as i panicked about what had happened.
the most toxic thing was that i was the only one left uninjured after what had just happened. jonah had very obviously broken his arm due to force from the large, red and white semi that had slammed directly into the driver’s side of the car. corbyn and christina had whiplash, and bruises from when they were forced forward and their seatbelts put too much pressure against them. jack had a large cut on his face that was due to a piece of metal from the semi breaking apart at contact and flying towards his face.
but the worst of the accident had to have happened to daniel and zach. being on the driver’s side of the car, daniel had been hit directly by the semi coming towards him and was forced into an airbag. they’d told me that he had internal bleeding that they were correcting at the moment and that he’d most likely suffer from a concussion from the airbag.
and zach. oh zach. he’d flown in front of me in attempt to protect me from the impact (which he’d done successfully). the way that the semi his the truck had led to the loosening of zach’s seatbelt. his face was cut up and his body was suffering. he had taken the brunt of it and with the damage done to him, the doctors had decided that the best way for him to heal was a medically induced coma. so before i could even say hello or goodbye to my injured boyfriend, they injected medication and sent him into a temporary sleeping state.
my eyes flickered as i sat down in a chair next to jack. he squeezed my hand firmly and winced in pain as the doctor carefully sewed him up, doing his best to prevent any scarring. i looked up and gave him a sad smile, trying to help him through the pain. the doctor was at the end of the cut and finished up, leaving the small little curtained off area that jack and i sat in.
“have you seen jonah yet?” jack asked me, “corbyn and christina are together”
i shook my head, “it was pretty obvious that he’d broken his arm”
“poor guy” he said and then squeezed my hand and forcing me to look up at him “hey, everything’s going to be ok”
“how come i’m the only one who’s not injured in some way?” i ask, “why did zach have to risk his life so that i didn’t get hurt? why couldn’t he just have protected himself?”
“don’t feel guilty, (y/n). you got yourself the best boyfriend, don’t give it up” Jack explained to me.
“had he not been trying to protect me, zach wouldn’t be so badly injured” i tell him, “he could freaking die and it’d be my fault”
“(y/n) tell me what the doctors told you” Jack quickly asked of me.
“zach was injured and he’s in a medically induced coma”
“ok, you’re smart, tell me what a medically induced coma is”
“it’s when a doctor decides that a person would better heal when the brain is resting” i explain what i’d learned in my two years as a biomedical student at my high school.
“and what part of that means dying?”
“it’s a coma, jack” i told him.
“medically induced” he stated again, “which means that the doctors are letting his brain heal on his own until the swelling goes down and he can heal without being unconscious. they’ll reverse with time, (y/n). don’t blame yourself unless you told someone to hit our car with a fucking truck because look at daniel. he did nothing to save anyone and he’s in terrible condition too. now, please go check on jonah and go see your boyfriend”
i gave jack a small smile and a tight hug as I left the curtained off room. I searched through the hallway until I saw Jonah inside a small bed area, with his curtain open. His arm was three times its size, wrapped in an extreme amount of bandaging.
“how’re you doing?” i frown at the tall boy and sit down on the chair next to his bed.
“i’ve been better” he told me, “but they just gave me some pain meds that feel really great”
“morphine” i laughed a little bit, “i’m glad that you’re in a little bit less pain. jack just got his stitches done”
“is he gonna be left with a nasty scar?” jonah questions.
“no, probably not” i answered and he groaned.
“that was the one thing i was hoping for” he told me, which i shouldn’t have laughed at but it was funny.
“what’d the doctors say about your arm?” i look at the bandaged arm.
“pretty bad fracture. not a complete break, though, so i don’t need surgery. just a cast for a couple months” he informed me and i nodded, “and that’s probably not even the worst injury caused by this accident”
I sniffled as the nurse let me into the small hospital room. the look of my boyfriend’s mouth stuffed with a large tube that helped his lungs breath nearly made me crawl up in a ball on the floor and start sobbing. let alone the gashes and cuts that crawled his arms, and the bruises left on his forehead. his normally perfect hair flopped over, messy from the events of the day and i knew that he wouldn’t approve. i stopped in front of him as the nurse stood at the door to be sure that nothing happened to either of us.
my breath hitched as i looked over to her to gain permission, “c-c-can i to-touch him?”
she nodded her head as my hand slipped into his cold one, which truly broke me. i felt a tear slip down my face as i rubbed my thumb over his gently. i let another fall directly onto his hand and cried a little bit harder as i rubbed the wet mark off of his skin, the spot evaporating quickly.
the nurse stepped a little bit further into the room and spoke up, “You can speak to him, if you’d like. Studies have shown that it is therapeutic for loved ones to talk to their injured family members, and there are some studies that show that patients can hear when you talk to them and it’s helped in the healing process. I can give you some privacy if you’d like”
i nodded my head, “that’d be great”
she nodded her head and left the room. the emptiness of the plain white room broke my heart all over again. zach had to lay here for god-only-knows-how-long and no one could do anything about it.
i moved closer to zach, looking at him carefully, my voice slow and crackly at first, “i-it’s me, zach. (y/n). I just- - i want you to know how much you mean to me. I love you with all my heart. thank you for everything you’ve done for me. especially for today”
i spoke again after a minute, “i promise that i’ll come here every day, zachy. the boys and i-- we’ll come see you everyday while you’re healing. everyone’s ok. we’re all ok, so now we need you to be ok”
another tear slipped down my face as i continued on, “because you and i-- zach, we’ve got a future together and i need you to be ok so that we can have that. i want to go to prom with you zach. i want to go to your first arena show and i want to watch your album win awards and hit number one. i want to marry you zach, so i need you to be ok. i need you, zach”
i cried harder with the words that left my mouth. maybe he won’t wake up today, i know that. but maybe eventually, when i tell him enough and when he’s healthy enough, he’ll come back to me.
he will. i know it. zach is not leaving me.
#zach herron#jack avery#jonah marais#daniel seavey#corbyn besson#zach herron imagine#why don't we#wdw#fanfic#imagine#beautychickee
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blisters; tom holland
pairing: tom holland x reader word count: 1,118 summary: you like to go rock climbing and one time you take tom with you. the next day you have blisters all over your hands, which you have sometimes. he gets worried and takes care of you. warning: I added a lil bit jealous!tom, also asshole!tom hehe. (promise fluff will come) request by @myaftertaste, hope you like it. my other work
‘Hey Darling, wait where did you go?’ Tom asked you as you entered the house. ‘Came back from indoor rock climbing’ You lightly said and got a glass of water.
‘You do rock climbing?’ He sat up. ‘I’ve done it since I was a kid. I actually like to go outdoor rock climbing, but unfortunately it’s not the season. I thought you knew I did?’ You sat down next to him and pecked his lips. ‘No I did not know that. Seems like fun’ He said with a smile. He thought it was cute how you talked about rock climbing. Full of passion.
‘Do you wanna come with me tomorrow? Oh my god, Tom it would be the best if you came with me tomorrow!’ You squealed in excitement.
‘Of course, darling. Besides, it’s not that hard right?’ He gave you a kiss and chuckled.
‘What do you mean I have to do beginners class?’ Tom said to your trainer. ‘Dude, (Y/n) has done this for like an eternity. You’re not as skilled as she is. Chop chop, of to beginners class you go’ He told Tom and laughed.
The beginners class was given by your trainer, Tom’s instructor, on a smaller wall. You decided to climb next to the class to support your boyfriend.
Your instructor helped you strap in and went over to Tom, and like seven kids. The beginners class was usually kids from age six to twelve. But now they also had a grumpy twenty one year old.
When it was Tom’s turn he sighed and rubbed his eyes. Of course he was good at it and he was gonna show that stupid instructor of yours. ‘You’re doing so good, babe!’ You yelled from the top of the wall to Tom who was rushing to the top. Obviously he knew he was doing great, he was Spider-man for god’s sake, he knew how to climb a freaking wall.
‘(Y/n) focus!’ The instructor said. You let yourself slowly fall down. ‘Yeah, that’s more like it. Looking tight’ He said with a wink. You just returned a smile and continued. As the instructor finished his sentence, Tom snapped his head around. The guy looked at him as he stared at him with a hateful look on his face. The instructor shrugged and smirked. He was hitting on you and you did not even see it! Tom was so buried in his fury he did not look what he was doing. ‘Focus, Holland!’ He heard the instructor before he crashed down to the ground.
‘Tom!’ You screamed and quickly lowered yourself to get off. You quickly walked over to him. He was on the ground groaning in pain. ‘Baby, are you okay?’ You were genuinely concerned. ‘Yeah, I am (Y/n), don’t worry’ He jumped up, ignoring his pain and got out of his gear. ‘I quit’ He said and gritted his teeth towards the instructor as he threw the gear on the ground. ‘If you break that, you pay’ The instructor told him to piss him off. ‘It’s not like I can’t afford it’ Tom ended the conversation without looking behind him and left to go home.
You stared at him with your jaw dropped. He went into complete asshole mode. You apologized to your trainer and went to get your stuff and your boyfriend.
‘You had been sitting in the car in tense silence. ‘Do you want to ta-’ you began. ‘No’ He cut you off and kept driving.
After you both took a shower you would normally cuddle up and watch a show together. But you both did not feel like it.
‘Are you willing to talk to me right now?’ you approached Tom who was sitting on the bed looking at his phone. He looked up and let out a ‘hmpf’. ‘You gotta talk to me about this, what’s wrong? Yeah you fell down, so what? You didn’t have to go all diva on that guy!’ You exclaimed.
‘Diva? Me a diva? (Y/n) he was hitting on my girlfriend the least was trying to be was a diva. I thought we were doing this together not you dumping me in beginners class’ he said and looked away. ‘Hitting on me? He wasn’t he was just trying to help you and if you had followed beginners class for 15 minutes you could’ve climbed up the big boy wall with me!’
You both got louder and louder and the argument got hotter by the minute. ‘You know what? I’m done. I’ll sleep on the couch tonight!’ You yelled in his face and walked off, slamming the door behind you. Tom sighed and rubbed his face. He combed his hair with his hands and let himself fall on your bed.
An hour later you were knocked out on the couch. Tom went down to get you in bed and noticed your eyes being red as he picked you up. He sighed, he hated to see you cry over him. 'I’m so sorry, darling. I promise I’ll make it up to you’ he kissed your forehead and carried you upstairs. He put you in your bed and tucked you in. One last kiss on your cheek and he went downstairs to sleep on the couch.
'Good morning’ You saw Tom leaning against the door post as dimmed lights illuminated his face. You looked at your surrounding and noticed you were in bed. You looked up at him and before you could ask he said: 'I slept on the couch’. 'Here’s some breakfast’ he sat down a plate and a glass for you. As you dug in he sat next to you. ’(Y/n) I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, I overreacted. I don’t know what got into me I just wanted to do something fun with you, I love you’ he said with a smile. 'It’s okay, I love your too’ you kissed him on his cheek.
He turned your face to kiss you and took your hands in his. 'What are these?’ He turned your hands to expose nasty blisters you got from rock climbing. 'Just blisters, they’re not a big deal, honey’ you said with a giggle. 'You’re sure? Because I will call up a doctor right now, I will take you to the ER’ He was already in the bathroom looking for the first aid kid. 'Tom I assure you, it’s common in rock climbing, don’t worry come sit down’ you laughed. 'No I gotta check if you’re alright’ and with that he started putting bandages around your hands. What a dork.
A/n: We hit 300 followers!! Thanks friends, welcome to all the new friends (; The respond on dogs was great by the way!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BABE ZENDAYA OMG.
I went to the glasses people for a check up, because I’ve not worn my plus glasses for two years. I did not think I would be leaving with a new pair of negative glasses, what the fuck. Now I have to wear fucking glasses again 24/7. FUCK OFF. (i did pick a really cute brownish, 50s styled pair, but still). I was kinda pissed.
Thank you all so much with being patient. I am in senior year and the first two weeks have been hard! (I have a very empty agenda this weekend, hoping to write a lot)
You are awesome! Wanna talk? hit me up! Requests are welcome! (for those who sent in requests, I am working on them I promise x )
give this a little like if you liked it!
and I’ll see you in the next one!
#tom holland#tom holland imagine#tom holland fan fiction#tom holland fanfiction#tom holland one shot#tom holland oneshot#peter parker#peter parker fan fiction#peter parker fanfiction#peter parker one shot#peter parker oneshot#peter parker imagine#harrison osterfield#spider-man: homecoming#spiderman homecoming#spiderman fanfiction#spiderman imagine#spiderman oneshot#Spider-man
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Previously on Frat Boy...
*this does not include chapters 1-3, we’re getting straight into it!
Jumping into CHAPPIE 4
IT’S A NIGHTMARE AT KEANS! A potentially seductive tutoring session gone wrong, Harry ends up beating up some good-for-nothings (remember the cheap cologne and snake tattoo) who tried to mug her and potentially something mUCH WORSE. She gets a slice on her neck from it and Harry is all brooding and rain-soaked and carries her to the car in sILENCE
HE SPENDS THE NIGHT BECAUSE SHE’S TOO SCARED TO BE BY HERSELF AND HE JUST DEADASS CHOOSES THE FLOOR OVER GETTING INTO BED WITH HER
BUT THEN she scoots over to make some room for him and they end up mAKING OUT AND Harry is just being so cuddly??? And soft???? And when she asks him why he’s being like this he says, “Not everyone’s you.”
Renny walks in though and that leaves an awkward moment when Harry picks up his pants and leaves in a rush and then she’s not quite sure where that leaves her and Harry #THANKSRENNY
CHAPPIE 5
She doesn’t listen to harry and goes to class the next day because she can’t be alone so when she enters the lecture hall she sees Harry and – ALERT! ALERT!!!!! THERE’S A GIGGLY GIRL BETWEEN HIS LEGS *cough* it’s Vivienne *cough*
After class is over she quickly leaves in hopes she’ll be able to escape Harry’s attention BUT he races to catch up with her *swoon*
After last night’s cuddle and MAKEOUT SESH HELLO things seem to be going well with them and so he asks her to wear his jersey before the big game
SHE SAYS NO!??? WHAT!??? SHE’S SUCH A BISH WHAT THE FUCK
Exact words: “It was a mistake. I was scared and lonely and you were… you were just there.”
Harry points out that HELLO it was HER who kissed HIM first
Then Vivienne comes out of class to join them and has to butt her head into it and mention some random dress requirements about how he should be looking good tonight
That CLEARLY meant it was a date (wrong) so she felt justified in turning him down like that (wrong)
Anywho, mum finds out about Keans and Renny wants her to go to the authorities but they both don’t push her.
And it’s the... *drumroll* Sorority Halloween party! She was NOT expecting harry to be the DJ
^^^ Basically how it went down in a few bullet points
The sorority girls were emotional hoes and made an open-ended invitation so they could see what the girls took away from it (aka who dressed as a hoe and who didn’t) - Renny exposed her hoe-ish side whereas she was dressed nicely
SO they switch clothes so Renny can save her own skin. Fast forward five minutes and she’s bent over the sink in a short plaid skirt while she tries to get the boob stain out when Harry comes up behind her. Her exact thoughts -
SO she tries to take the high road and apologize to Harry about earlier BUT HARRY’S A HURT PUPPY NOW OKAY NO ONE GETS TO MAKE HIM FEEL STUPID
So Harry interrupts her apology. But she thought he’d cared a bit?? And he looked actually hurt this morning??? He was acting different last night too and here she was actually APOLOGIZING …. But now he’s back to being a dick and he tells her it meant nothing to him and is, well, pretty harsh. (Which OBVI gets her butthurt)
She runs away to grab Renny and escape but Renny wants to stay because this is THE choicest party of the year and she NEEDS to get into this sorority
She gets it, so she turns to leave but then races up the stairs because she saw him up there and DAMN IT SHE WILL HAVE THE LAST WORD IF IT’S THE LAST THING SHE DOES BECAUSE SHE HAS A SUSPICION THAT HE’S LYING TO HER AND DAMN IT SHE WON’T BE MADE TO LOOK THE FOOL
BIG MISTAKE- she hears him with another woman behind the door.
She runs away. Sadness. Confusion.
She sees Zayn in the street and he’s bummed because it isn’t working out with this model he’s drawing but he’s nice, and sweet...
CHAPPIE 6
It’s FOOTBALL TIME – they go to a soccer game and she drools over how hot harry is and he seems EXTRA worked up on the fieLD. A little ANGRY. A little HURT.
They win and some drunken sportsman just grabs her face and kisses her
They camp to celebrate their victory and Zayn is getting nice and talkative with her, but Renny is texting Niall and he invites her to the beach party the team’s throwing at the expensive vintage cottages on the other side of the highway
THIS HOE MAKES HER WALK HER ALL THE WAY THERE but of course she isn’t going to stay because HARRY IS THERE. So she has to leave. By herself.
But not before she sees the guy who kissed her in the stands and he was HELLA beat up
*suspicious*
We get a little insight into Harry’s judgemental “i hate every single one of you” mindset and he has a sass down with Renny before running after her because HELLO RENNY U DUMB SHIT SHE JUST WENT THROUGH ALL THIS TRAUMATIC NASTINESS AND U SEND HER OUT TO THE CAMPGROUNDS ALONE?!!!!
SO harry is a lil stalker and follows her back to the grounds. She almost has a heart attack when she sees him but she (though annoyed) accepts the company. They try and play a little game of 21 questions but it really turns into “I’ll answer one vaguely and you can ask one later” after harry gets snappy about his parents #parentproblems.
Things get a little foggy but he ends up whining and getting into the sleeping bag with her
BUT GET THIS…. SHE’S THE ONE TO SNUGGLE UP AGAINST HIM IN HER SLEEP INDUCED STATE
And then in the middle of the night she has a nightmare and he comforts her, holds her, says it’s gonna be okay :(
That was a little aggressive. Let’s move on to CHAPPIE 7
IT’S THE MORNING AFTER HEY-O and Zayn offers to take her out for pancakes with the guys but Harry’s all like nah man I’m taking her, look I already took down the tent and everything I’m such a hunky man. So Zayn leaves. Harry takes her home (not to bed) before leaving in his nice ass range rover because he has these elusive “plans” and she ALMOST gets him to smile but then he offered to pay for her notes and she took it the wrong way
MOM VISITS and she bought her a dress for the sorority dinner tonight at the fancy shmancy restaurant. There’s a lil bit of tension because...well… where is this money coming from??? But she doesn’t say anything, because her mom is trying so hard. And she just wants her to be happy.
We jump to the sorority dinner and Vivienne’s there. She misses out on dessert which she was NOT happy about. Why’d she miss out? Because Harry paid for her meal while he was on a date with another woman and she ran out in a huff. Harry chases her, but they get in an even bigger argument because she’s fired up about harry being with ANOTHER girl and she’s all I FEEL SORRY FOR YOU OKAY YOU’RE GOING TO DIE ALONE
(basically)
Which leads us to our most-recent CHAPPIE 8
She regrets being so angry last night at Harry because she revealed her emotions to him – well, the alcohol did. But - no going back now!
Zayn asks her to model for her at the coffee shop!! You say yes!! Shocker!!!! He leaves happy with a pep in his step. But she hopes it’s not because he LIKES her in a certain WAY ;)
But…. *dramatic music* SHE SEES THE MYSTERY DATE KISSING ANOTHER MAN AT THE COFFEE SHOP WHEN SHE’S ABOUT TO LEAVE
So she goes to visit Harry’s practice to rat out the cheater because she doesn’t want a girl using him (why does she care though amiright?)
BUT THE GIRL IS HARRY’S SISTER WHAT
And thus she gets invited to their family dinner and she has no idea what she’s gotten herself into
The long awaited CHAPPIE 9 starts up in the Styles’s mansion home on Coast Hills Drive
passing Teslas, Porsches, you know, the standard, turns out Harry has THE LARGEST FREAKING FAMILY HOME ON THE CORNER (obvi, did we expect anything less)
A “meet his highly dysfunctional family” kind of dinner with the unwelcomed guest Viv, and hosted by Mary and Lionel Styles. All is well until... Y/N points out that only Harry, Gemma, and her bf Charlie are the ones with the accent
AND THEN Harry flips his sh*t over his dad saying he’s a beach bum because apparently that’s a lie that runs DEEP (#daddyissues?). Basically everyone is uncomfortable and Harry ditches the table.
She’s leaving, too, when Viv runs after her and dishes that the reason they don’t all have accents is because Harry is adopted.
JUST WHEN SHE THOUGHT SHE COULD LEAVE.... her car dies. Embarrassing, really. Right in front of Harry and his gazillion dollar mansion.
Now it’s a forced impromptu sleepover and Harry gives you a tour of the house - there’s the living wing where his parents sleep and where his dad keeps live animals, the movie theatre, sunroom, panoramic ocean views...
the guest room she gets set up in is nice, and she tries to find face soap in the cabinets but THERE’S JUST PILLS AND WABAM! - MARY STYLES IS SITTING EERILY AT THE FOOT OF THE GUEST BED WATCHING HER. She points to the sky and mumbles something about how she picked it. And something about a Jane.
Harry comes and whisks crazy lady away, but now she has the heeby jeebies in that empty room and she walks to Harry’s door in the middle fo the night becAUSE WHAT OTHER HUNKY MAN WILL MAKE HER FEEL SAFE.
We pick-up right where we left off in CHAPPIE 10
Harry’s all rambly and cute and fetches her some different pills (melatonin) to help her sleep
Somehow she makes it to his bed HELLO and they’re listening to the waves crash when she mentions Viv because that bish is still on her mind and she can’t shake the feeling that THAT is the hoe harry’s been with
obvi he answers they’re just longtime family friends
AND THEN LIKE A BIG GIRL SHE APOLOGIZES FOR BEING NASTY TO HIM AND SAYING MEAN THINGS AT THAT SORORITY DINNER
And then she finally expresses her vulnerabilities!! Yes girl!! She tells him he says it doesn’t matter a lot, and he whips it back and says she’s the one who said it first after the make out sesh post-Keans coffee mugging fiasco. SO she tells him why she said it didn’t matter!!! AKA because she didn’t want to get hurt and believe he thought of her any differently than all the other girls in the past. Progress! Expression!
But then...BUT THEN... HE APOLOGIZES FOR KISSING HER. Even though people kiss all the time she wasn’t “people” and hE THINKS HE TOOK ADVANTAGE OF HER SCARED STATE!?? Why so sweet??
and then when he offers for her to sleep there there’s this weird tensiony “you’re really hot and sexy in the moonlight and you’re right freaking next to me” tension & she tries to kiss him
BUT HE SAYS DON’T, THAT HE CAN’T, THAT HE’S SORRY SHE CAME THERE
After agonizing minutes of observing his peaceful chiseled body, she asks him why there’s a crib in the closet - but naturally he’s already asleep SO NO ANSWERS ARE GIVEN
Then in the AM Charlie gets the jumper cables that were there the ENTIRE TIME (thanks for NOT mentioning that, Harry) so she and her car “Grandpa” are good to leave
Gemma’s there to say goodbye, too and she said that Harry handled everything well yesterday.... that they didn’t hear anything...
But when Charlie pulls her in for a side hug it triggers a distant memory about someone and she pushes it away...
Back at school, she’s wrapping up Matt the perfect American boy athlete’s shoulder when he says she smells like boy. It’s Harry. She smells like his cologne and bedsheets, and she rips off the shirt as soon as she can.
And now that we’re all caught up, CHAPPIE 11 IS DROPPIN WITHIN 24 HOURS!!!!
#frat boy update#frat boy#harry styles fan fiction#harry styles fan fic#one direction fan fiction#frat boy harry
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BIGGEST GODDAMN SURVEY EVER HOLY SHIT
1- How are you? Content I suppose.
2- Post a picture of yourself. I did yesterday you fuck, go look.
3- Do you ever wish you were someone else? Nah, I’d probably still be messed up as anyone else.
4- What is your entire name? Conner Wade Garcia.
5- How old are you? 24.
6- Age you get mistaken for: I’ve been mistaken for like 19.
7- Your zodiac/horoscope and if you think it fits your personality: Libra, and yeah, the stuff I see is usually fairly accurate.
8- What did you do on your last birthday? Worked, and then slept.
9- What is one thing you would like to accomplish before your next birthday? Uhh...maybe quit drinking?
10- What is your hair color? Dark brown.
11- Have you ever dyed your hair? I had a rat tail when I was like 12 that I dyed blonde.
12- What is your eye color? Hazel, sometimes gray.
13- If you could change your eye color, would you? I’d make them perma-gray.
14- Do you wear contacts/glasses? Yep, I’m fucking blind without my contacts.
15- Your opinion about your body and how confortable you are with it: Meh. It needs work. Fucking pudgy belly.
16- Have you ever considered plastic surgery? What would you alter about your body? Nope.
17- Say 8 facts about your body: That’s a lot, so I’ll say one: I have two scars on my right hand in almost the same place.
18- Do you have any tattoos? Not yet.
19- Do you have any piercings? Nope.
20- Left or right handed? I am a righty, not a subhuman Morlock freak witch person.
21- What’s your sexual orientation? Straight.
22- Do you drink? Yeah, more than I should.
23- Do you smoke? No.
24- Do you have any pets? I wish. I want a kitteh.
25- Where do you work? I don’t right now. I worked at Walmart til like a month ago.
26- Something you are working on right now: Cutting back on my drinking.
27- Do you have any “rules” about food? Nah, but there are some foods I just can’t stand.
28- Where are you from? Tennessee. Ew.
29- What would you say is your best quality? Uhh. I’m good at listening.
30- What do you think you’re really good at? Guitar.
31- What do you think you’re really bad at? Staying sober.
32- What talent do you wish you’d been born with? I’d be happy with not having been born with depression.
33- Are you a bad person? Well I mean I think I kind of suck, but everyone says I’m awesome.
34- Are you nice to everyone? I try to be.
35- Say 3 facts about your personality: I have a temper, I like to listen, and I doubt myself a lot.
36- Has someone ever spread a nasty rumor about you? Yeah lol.
37- What is your ideal bed? Why? A king bed with a curtain around it, because fuck anyone staring at me sleeping. Unless it’s my girlfriend.
38- Did you wake up cranky? Depends on how early I get up.
39- Do you sleep with a stuffed toy? Sometimes.
40- What do you think about the most? My mind is too all over the place for that.
41- Share 2 habits: Drinking and nail-biting.
42- What you want to be when you “get older”? Financially stable bruh.
43- What are your career goals? To not live paycheck to paycheck. And maybe to not hate my job.
44- What is your ideal career? Musician.
45- Is your life anything like it was two years ago? Fucking fuck no.
46- Do you replay things that have happened in your head? Oh yeah, that’s like 98% of my day.
47- Have you ever had an imaginary friend? Yeah, I have.
48- Say 10 facts about your room: I’m not gonna listen ten, but I have a bunch of band/music posters, there’s an electric drum kit in the corner, there are lots of dragon statues, there’s an Arcueid figure (Tsukihime for anyone who gets that), uhh...Borderlands 2 is paused on my TV right now. And there are many guitars.
49- Do you have any phobias? Spiders, needles, and fucking tornadoes.
50- Have you ever been to a psychiatrist/therapist? Yeah, both of them. The therapist stopped practicing which sucked and the psychiatrist was a Godfagging quack.
51- Are you allergic to anything? If so, what? Pollen, rabbits, pork, artificial green apple, cat dandruff, and goldenrod. And amoxicillin.
52- Ever broken any bones? Nope, and I have no idea how.
53- Ever come close to death? Yeah, a couple of times.
54- Things you like and dislike about yourself: Uhh. I like my looks for the most part and my musical talent. Hate pretty much everything else lol.
55- A random fact about yourself: I can curl my tongue. Helps me play the harmonica.
56- What are three things most people don’t know about you? I’ve kissed a guy before, I cry a lot for a guy (or for a person, probably), and I like anime a lot. Specifically stupid slice of life shit and shonen.
57- An unknown fact about your life: Uhh. My stupid fucking taskbar can’t be right clicked. I hate Windows 10.
58- Share something about yourself others might think is weird: I like being choked and slapped in bed.
59- Five weird things that you like: Fried calimari, pineapple on pizza, Wendy’s fries dipped in their chocolate shake (thanks Jess), classical music, and getting drunk outside.
60- Do you have a facebook? If so, would you add the person who sent you this? Yes. And nobody sent me this, I just fill these out as surveys because nobody fucking responds if I just reblog it.
61- Do you have any pictures on your Facebook? Yeah, but they’re not recent. I’m not really active on there anymore.
62- Describe yourself in one word/sentence: Fucked up.
63- A quote you try to live by: “I choose to live rather than just exist” comes the closest, but I’m doing a terrible job of that lol.
64- Leave me a compliment: Uhh. Anyone who reads this, you’re pretty.
Favorites
65- What is your favorite thing to do? Play guitar or listen to music. Or, lately, play Borderlands 2. The DLC is poppin’, yo.
66- What’s your favorite color? Black.
67- What’s your favorite band/singer? Favorite band is Children of Bodom. Favorite singers are James Hetfield, Marc Hudson, Howard Jones, John Lennon, Paul McCartney, Elvis Presley, Anders Fridén, Matt Heafy, Warrel Dane, Amy Lee, probably others I’ve forgotten.
68- What’s your favorite movie? That’s hard. Goodfellas, the Godfather Part I and II, 300, both Avengers movies, Captain America: Civil War, Titanic, Hesher, and Good Will Hunting are some of my favorites.
69- What are your favorite books? The Wheel of Time series, Bag of Bones, the Harry Potter series, The Way of Kings, Words of Radiance, Penpal, Shout!: The Beatles in Their Generation, A Painted House, Jurassic Park, Black Lightning, shit I have a lot more.
70- What is your favorite quote and why? The above quote, because it represents what I wish I could actually do. But ya know. Money.
71- What is your favorite word? Fuck.
72- What is your least favorite word? Money.
73- What is your favorite type of food? Italian food motherfucker. Specifically lasagna.
74- Your favorite ice cream? Heath bar.
75- What’s your favorite animal? KITTEH.
76- Dogs or cats? KITTEHS.
77- Describe your favourite texture: Uhh. Those really soft silky-feeling blankets.
78- What is your favorite flower? A BLACK ROSE EHHHH SO EDGY. Probably daffodils.
79- What’s your favourite scent? And on the opposite sex? The smell right before or after it rains. And on the opposite sex, whatever perfume they like.
80- What is your favorite season? Spring.
81- What are the top five places you wish you could go before you die? Venice, Berlin, Scotland, Norway, and that weird island with the dragon fruit and flat freaky trees that I’ve forgotten the name of and am too lazy to Google.
82- What are four things you can’t live without and why? Internet, phone, music, and cute animals. Because they keep me from fucking murdering myself.
83- Which mythological creature are you most like? Why? I have no idea but I’m gonna take a quiz right now, brb. Apparently I’m a goddamn unicorn, fuck.
84- What’s your favorite television show? House M.D.
85- Favorite place to shop at? Walmart. Fuck shopping bruh.
86- Say 2 facts about your favorite things: Uhh. One has strings and one lives in Germany.
Family, childhood and places
87- Say 4 facts about your parents: My dad is Spanish, my mom has depression, they divorced when I was like 11, and my dad is a medical professional.
88- Are you more like your mom or your dad? I think I’m like. Exactly equal to both of them. It’s frustrating.
89- Do you have any siblings? An older half brother, two younger step siblings, and two younger half brothers.
90- Say 9 facts about your family: That’s too many facts, die. My family is really big though and my dad’s side can speak Spanish.
91- What’s your relationship like with your family? Meh. Not great with my dad, my mom and I are fine though.
92- Say 7 facts about your childhood: There was a lot of stress and emotional abuse and shit. But it was also a better childhood than most people I think.
93- The best and the worst childhood memories: one of my favorites was when I got a PS1 for my birthday. Worst, I have no idea. Whenever my parents fought, which was a lot.
94- Say 6 facts about your home town: It’s tiny, it’s full of rednecks with fucking F10000 penis substitutes, it has a pretty chill as county fair. I know that’s only 4, fuck off.
95- Are you going out of town soon? Nah, I doubt it.
96- Where would you like to live? If I had to stay in America, California. If I could leave, I dunno, probably Norway or Sweden. Somewhere in Europe definitely.
97- What would your dream house be like? Victorian style please.
98- Where would you go on your dream vacation? Italy. I’d get banned from the country for eating all their food.
99- Where you want to be right now? With my girlfriend, or at a beach somewhere.
100- Top three places to visit: Venice, Berlin, Spain.
Friends
101- Would you ever smile at a stranger? Yeah, I do sometimes.
102- Do you prefer to be friends with girls or boys? Girls. Most of the guys around here act like douches and only ever talk about sports or fucking girls.
103- Who is someone you never tire of? My girlfriend.
104- Do you have someone you can be your complete self around? There are a couple of people.
105- Who is your most loyal friend? Phil.
106- Is there anyone you can tell EVERYTHING to? Mhmm. Three people.
107- If your best friend died, what would you do? Get horrendously drunk for days on end and snap at everyone.
108- A reason you’ve lied to a friend: No idea. Probably because I didn’t want to leave my house or something, lol.
109- Have you ever felt replaced? Yeah, sometimes.
110- Say 5 facts about your bestfriend(s): Too many facts. But he is a drummer and he likes roleplaying games.
Relationships
111- The last person you hugged? Not a fucking clue. Sasha I think.
112- Who was your first kiss with? Girl named Jessica. It was in the garden section at Walmart lol.
113- Do you like kissing in public? I fucking love it.
114- Have you ever kissed someone older than you? Yeah, plenty of times.
115- You have a preference for boys or girls? Girls pls.
116- Is the male or female body closest to perfection? I don’t think anything or anyone is perfect, but I prefer the female body.
117- Do you believe in love at first sight? Nah.
118- Do you believe in soul mates? Maybe. I didn’t used to but now I kinda do.
119- What is your idea of the perfect date? I don’t really care honestly. Just something cute and romantic.
120- Based on past relationships or crushes, describe your perfect boyfriend/girlfriend: I like someone who I can talk to and not get bored of, someone who can keep up with my weird thought processes, and someone who doesn’t mind me being a kinky fuck.
121- What is the first thing you noticed in someone? Eyes or face in general, usually. Unless they’re wearing a crazy outfit or something.
122- Are looks important in a relationship? Yeah. They’re not the most important thing but I have to be attracted to someone.
123- What’s the most superficial characteristic you look for? There’s not really an external characteristic someone needs to have for me to like them, but I love red hair.
124- What’s your opinion on age differences in relationships? No biggie as long as it’s not like a 26 year old dating a 13 year old or something. My ex and I were five years apart.
125- Would you ever date someone off of the Internet? Hahaha. The only two serious relationships I’ve had were on the Internet.
126- Five guys/girls whom you find attractive: The girlfriend, the ex girlfriend, Emma Watson, Olivia Wilde, Mila Kunis.
127- Do you have a crush on anyone? It’s a bit more than a crush.
128- A description of the girl/boy you like: She’s hot as fuck yo. Hotter than you. :D
129- Say 1 fact about the person your like: She has facial piercings and she always loses :P
130- If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say? “Can I meet the body I mean person?”
131- When was the last time you told someone you loved them? Whenever I sent the girlfriend the last message lol.
132- Do you think someone has feelings for you? I know she does.
133- Do you think someone is thinking about you right now? Probably. Ew.
134- Have you ever cried over a guy/girl? You could say I make a habit of it.
135- Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have? Who hasn’t?
136- Anyone you’re giving up on? Nah. Probably should be, but nah.
137- Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to? Yup.
138- Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated? Yeah, the girl I dated throughout high school was kind of a cunt to my friends.
139- Have you ever liked one of your best friends? Yup.
140- Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you? Mhmm. Scary thought haha.
141- Is there a boy/girl who you would do absolutely everything for? Yes.
142- Is there someone you will never forget? Absolutely.
143- Say five ways to win your heart: Babble at me in a foreign language, cook me Italian food, introduce me to your cat, leave big ass scratches down my back, or act like a sappy romantic fuck.
144- What turns you on? Slapping, choking, hair pulling, biting, scratching, moaning, hard tongue on tongue kissing, girl on girl. I’m a guy. Eat me.
145- What turns you off? Bitchy people and close-minded bigoted fucks.
146- What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you? Jerk me while you whisper about fucking a girl into my ear and don’t let me cum until you say so. It has been done to me and it was fucking awesome.
147- What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you? Probably when I found out Jess had started a separate bank account and was funneling parts of her paychecks into it to help me financially when I moved up there. Nice job fucking that one up, Conner.
148- What’s something sweet you’d like someone to do for you? Honestly I don’t care at this point. Just love me lol.
149- Have you ever written a song or poem for someone? Have you had one written for you? Yes, and no actually.
150- What’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for someone? Woke Jess up while she was clearly having a nightmare and held her hand until she calmed down.
151- Are you in love? Yes.
152- Are you in a relationship? Yes.
153- If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her? She’s a fucking dork and I love it.
154- Are relationships ever worth it? Yeah, they’re just hard.
155- Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are? I don’t think so.
156- Can you commit to one person? Mhmm.
157- Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat? Yeah, I’ve done it plenty of times lol.
158- Do you ever want to get married? Yes.
159- Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years? Maybe. Hopefully.
160- Future names of your children: I do not want kids.
161- Do you get jealous easily? Yeah. Not like possessive jealous, but it’s pretty easy to make me jealous.
162- The last time you felt jealous, and why? I have no idea. Probably when my girlfriend hung out with her shit ex lol.
163- What is your definition of cheating? Anything you wouldn’t want your partner finding out about I suppose. I guess anything past hugging/holding hands.
164- Have you ever been cheated on? Yes.
165- Do you forgive betrayal? Eh. I probably would even though I shouldn’t.
166- Have you ever cheated on someone? Not my proudest moment, but yes, I cheated to get back at her for cheating on me. It did not help.
167- Why did your last relationship fail? Because I was an asshole and I fucked it up.
168- Things you want to say to an ex: I am so sorry, it was entirely my fault, you did nothing wrong and I hope you forgive me.
169- A description of the person you dislike the most: Anyone who has dated my girlfriend. :P
170- If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept? I would have no idea wtf she’s apologizing for, but yeah of course.
171- How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had? Not a clue honestly. A good many, but most of them haven’t been serious.
172- How long was your longest relationship? Almost 5 years.
173- You’ll love me if… You like musicians I guess?
174- Share a relationship story: Lol okay. So when I went to visit Jess, we went out for dinner with her roommate and her roommate’s boyfriend. And they all went to a super Christian private college. We were trying to keep our relationship sort of on the DL because the school was very gossip-y and Jess grew up in a town of like 700 people and her parents were ridiculous about her dating, much less dating a dude five years older that she met online. But anyway. We finished eating and we were all shooting the shit, and when we got up to take the dishes over to the little conveyor belt thing Jess and I kinda play-wrestled and I knocked a plate on her arm. And she was like “Look you made a mess on my hand” and without even thinking I said “Yeah, that’s what I do” without troubling to keep my voice down and winked like a dumbass. And she turned redder than a tomato and her roommate got this “OMFG” look on her face and Jess punched the shit out of my shoulder hahaha. Ahh. Good memories.
Music, movies and books
175- How often do you listen to music? Pretty much whenever I’m not watching a movie or playing a game.
176- What kind of music you like? I am a metalhead but I like everything.
177- Do you like to dance? I like to mosh.
178- What was the first concert/show you attended? Killswitch Engage with Parkway Drive, Escape Plan and Every Time I Die.
179- Have you heard a song that reminds you of someone today? Yeah.
180- Share a song that takes you to a certain memory in the past: “Hello” by Adele. Shit was always on the pop station that my ex and I listened to in SD.
181- A song that’s been stuck in your head: “Hoshi no Furumachi” by The Fallen Moon.
182- Put your music player on shuffle and write the first ten songs that play: Oh fuck off, fine. 1. Your Love Kills Me--The Veer Union 2. Everybody’s Trying to Be My Baby--The Beatles 3. Baptism -strings ver.-: Fate/Stay Night OST 4. Bang Bang--Jessie J, Ariana Grande and Nicki Minaj 5. What is Eternal--Trans-Siberian Orchestra 6. Big Girls Don’t Cry--Fergie 7. Space Room--Bruce Faulconer 8. The Gun Show--In This Moment 9. Shit Out of Luck--Foamy the Squirrel 10. Blaze Heatnix--Megaman X6 OST
183- A book you want to read/have recently read: I wanna finish reading Bazaar of Bad Dreams.
184- Describe your dream library: Just fucking packed with horror and fantasy and drama books. And biographies.
185- Last movie you just watched: Uhh...Pumpkinhead II: Blood Wings.
186- Do you like watching what type of movies? I love horror.
Situations and crazy things
187- You’re in a tattoo parlor about to get inked. What are you getting done? 7-star Dragon Ball on my shoulder.
189- What’s something you can see yourself going to jail for? Pirating too much shit. :P
190- If you could be any character, from any literary work, who would you choose to be? I wouldn’t. Becoming someone else would be shitty.
191- You’re given $10,000…under one condition:you cannot keep the money for yourself. Who would you give it to? My girlfriend probably. Then she could afford a plane ticket :P
192- If you had to go back in time and change one thing, what would it be? Don’t ask me that, I’ll get sad.
193- If you were an element on the Periodic Table, which would you be and why? Polonium. Because it sounds cool.
194- If you had to delete one year of your life completely, which would it be? 2016. It was shit.
195- You’re an Action Movie Hero. What’s your weapon of choice and the line you scream when defeating your arch enemy? Give me a badass sword. And I dunno, probably “I’ve got balls of steel”
196- If you could design an amusement park ride, what would it be like? Some bullshit crazy roller coaster that has a 1 in 10 chance of killing you.
197- What is the first curse word that comes to mind? FUCK.
198- What the last party you went to was… and when the next will be… Fuck parties.
199- Halloween costume idea? I was gonna be a Kroger bag for Halloween when I worked at Walmart.
200- What are you supposed to be doing right now? Nothing. I am ethereal.
201- Currently wanting to see anyone? Yes, always.
202- Why you follow me? I can’t, you’re a survey.
203- If you met me what would you do? Wonder how a survey was walking around.
204- Leave me a ridiculous question: Why are you so interested in me?
205- Leave me a cute message: Fluffy cats.
Opinions and beliefs
206- Is the cup half full or half empty for you right now? There is no cup. I smashed it.
207- Do you believe in fate/destiny? Nah.
208- What you wish for on 11:11? Happiness.
209- Do you consider yourself lucky? What’s your good luck charm? Fuck no lol.
210- Do you believe in aliens or life on other planets? Yeah, there’s no way we’re alone in this fuck huge universe.
211- What is your religion, if any? I am not religious.
212- Would you go against your moral code for money? Depends on which part of the moral code and the amount of money.
213- What’s more important to you:strength of the body or strength of the mind? Gimme dem moosels.
214- How important you think education is? If it’s a good education, very important, but the shit that passes for education in America is less important than deciding what kind of toilet paper to buy.
215- If you were the president, what would you do? Die of the anxiety and stress during my inauguration.
216- If you could change one thing in the world, what would you change? Money wouldn’t have turned everyone into a greedy cunt.
217- Is it the thought that counts? Or is that phrase circumstantial? Eh. Depends on the situation. Somebody with no medical training trying to save somebody who was injured and instead ends up accidentally killing them should have just kept their thoughts to themselves.
218- If you only had 24 hours to live, what would you do? Buy a plane ticket to Berlin.
219- Which movie character do you most identify with and why? Greg House. Because depression and alcoholism suck.
Feelings and Others
220- Are you a procrastinator or do you get things done early? I procrastinate procrastination.
221- Post a photo/draw a picture/write a poem (pick one) of a moment of personal significance: That is not happening, I am lazy.
222- Say 5 things you love unconditionally: The girlfriend, music, food, the Internet, and kittehs.
223- What motivates you in life? My girlfriend. Seriously if I hadn’t found her I’d be a puddle of vaguely human-shaped sadness on the ground.
224- Something that you’re proud of: I can play guitar.
225- Five words/phrases that make you laugh: “Look at this fucking bird making pasta. Just look at it for fuck’s sake”
226- Share the story of something that makes you smile: Watching all of the “Will it [insert food here]?” videos from GoodMythicalMorning with Jess. Fun nights.
227- Something you always think “what if…” about: You probably know the answer lol.
228- What was something you used to enjoy, but was ruined for you? What’s the story behind that? LotR. Because I watched them with Jess and now they just make me sad, stop making me think about this shit.
229- Describe one of the most awkward experiences of your life: When I tried to dance with my crush in like 3rd grade and had no idea wtf I was doing lmao.
230- Something/someone that you miss: THE GIRLFRIEND. WAKE YO ASS UP.
231- Are you over your past? Not entirely.
232- What is your saddest memory? When she broke up with me, what the fuck did I JUST say.
233- One of the hardest moments in your life: Holy fuck you’re doing this on purpose.
234- Is there something that happened in your past that you hate talking about? YEAH. AS A MATTER OF FUCKING FACT THERE IS.
235- What’s something you want to do that you’d be embarrassed to tell other people about? I wanna go to a vocaloid concert.
236- What was your most embarrassing moment? Fuck if I know. I embarrass myself a lot.
237- Share one of your fears/insecurities: I hate my nasty pudgy belly.
238- Something you’re currently worrying about: Getting a fucking job.
239- Have you done something you regret very much? Yes.
240- If you could take something back that you said or did, what would it be? I would take back what an asshole I was.
241- Does anyone hate you? Probably.
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👣 / COUGH COUGH
this iS SO LONG
do the parents have one child or are there twins, triplets, etc.?
Technically they have one first and then twins second. I’m gonna talk about Diantha
what do the parents name the baby(ies)?
Diantha, then Zephyr and Amaryllis
did the parents discuss other names, too?
Probably they argued a lot over names but at least they looked at similar types of names I think
how do they decide on the name(s)?
Diantha comes from Tink’s middle name, Dianthus, which is a green flower.
what would the child have been named if they had been the opposite sex?
Probably Basil no shame Tink is bad at names. Fairy names are notoriously unusual.
did the parents find out the sex during pregnancy or is it a surprise?
Diantha was born during the black fairy’s curse, presumably they would have found out the sex of the baby.
were there any complications in the pregnancy?
it was sped up because of a curse whoops....
which parent carried the baby?
Tink carried the first one, Fiona got the rest
how easy was it for them to conceive?
It was accidental *finger guns*
was the child carried to term?
Yes. She was born perfectly healthy and powerful.
did the parents deliver in a hospital, at home, or somewhere else?
Knowing Tink I’m sure she delivered in a hospital after she had Elora on her bedroom floor
did the delivery go according to plan?
Yeup! money can get that for you
did the parents have any daily rituals (reading to their belly, etc.)?
OH HELL YES! Fiona was all over that bump and fucking loves it so much. There are so many belly snuggles and kisses
do the parents have a baby shower?
Likely not actually, that was probably an inserted memory for the curse
what about a babymoon?
what even is that probably not tho
how supportive was the other parent during the pregnancy?
FIONA IS mOST SUPPORTIVE MOM EVER. They wanna do this right and she does everything in her power to make that happen.
which parent worried the most and which one was chill?
Tink worries a lot and I’m sure that Fiona does too but she’s more doting and willing to let them do things that Tink would freak about
which parent left pregnancy books all over the house and which didn’t touch them?
Tink is like ‘HOW WTF THIS ISN’T HARD’ then Diantha was born and she regretted EVERYTHING
infancy/toddler
is the child a good sleeper?
She sleeps so well but it’s probably because she’s allowed to sleep in her mom’s bed too much
how often does the child cry?
She’s a tad spoiled and does cry a lot as a baby
which parent finds it easier to get them to stop?
Tink I think has a lot of difficulty with it but she is the one that Diantha gets handed off to. It just makes sense
how does the child behave at bath time?
Right after din din, in the sink usually
what is the child’s first word?
“boo”
how bad do the child’s diapers smell and which parent has the misfortune of changing them?
terrible and ~magic~
which parent has a harder time adapting to their new role?
Likely Fiona since Tink already has Elora
just how terrible are the terrible twos?
She was so spoiled and g o d she would just stand there and scream for no reason
does the child go to day care? if they do, how old are they when they start?
Likely not, Tink probably stays home and takes care of the kids
if the child doesn’t go to day care, who says home to look after them?
TINK
which parent babyproofs the house?
Tink because she is the one that has to set up the stuff anyways, being a tinker she’s good with her hands B))
which parents designs the baby room?
Likely Fiona because curse powers
which parent is more likely to give in to tantrums?
They both can’t handle crying
is the child spoiled with toys?
....shhh
which parent does the potty training?
They probably both take part to a degree
which parent has to take them outside to hose them down after a particularly nasty diaper?
what?! no!???
which parent do they take after more?
Fiona probably or Tink when she was small
what habits do they pick up from their parents?
SPOILED. But also she is really mischevius and sneaky, she could get away with murder
how often is the parents’ date night now?
B3 well as often as they need but they also are very focused on their kids. So really they just make time after she goes to bed
who babysits when the parents go out?
Granny or Ruby likely
child
how did the parents decide what school to send the child to? or was the child home-schooled?
there’s only one school in storybrooke so I mean they don’t have a ton of choice
who packs the lunches?
Fiona is very very busy but she’s the one that usually mak
are the lunches eaten by the child, or thrown away?
She eats them of course! Her mother packed them and she may be spoiled but she’s not ungrateful and Fiona writes her cute lil notes too so
which parent helps with homework?
Tink usually does, she’s a little more versed in math and such
what does the report card look like?
English - BMath - A-History- APE - BArt - AScience - A+
is the child/ren popular, or only have a few friends?
She probably only has a few friends but they’re close and fiercely loyal
does the child play a sport?
Tennis likely
does the child play an instrument?
Piano or Violin I can’t decide
do both parents turn up to the matches/recitals?
DUH THEY’RE IN THE FRONT ROW WITH A CAMERA
which parent buys their clothes? or does the child pick out their own clothes?
Fiona and Tink make a thing of it, the kids get to pick some of their stuff for the weekends but their school clothes have to be mom approved
what’s the child’s style?
Too preppy for how much mud she plays in
is the child more interested in playing inside or outside?
M U D
how often does the child get in trouble? what do they get in trouble for?
Not enough probably and because she’s not doing homework or she’s taken something she shouldn’t have
does the child have any siblings/cousins? how well do they get along?
She has her older half sister, who she looks up to, and the younger twins (for now) that she rules over like Angelica from Rugrats
what pet does the child beg for? do they get it?
C H I C K E N and no of course not chickens are filthy and Tink is scared of them
is the child shy and reserved, or outgoing and gregarious?
Outgoing and quirky
does the child still take after the same parent they did as a toddler?
Closer to Tink now when she was little
teen
what does the child want to be/do when they finish school?
Likely follow in her mother’s footsteps with magic, she hasn’t formally understood her talent yet however
which parent does the child get along with better?
Fiona for sure
is the child out all night partying and drinking with their friends, or staying in studiously doing homework? or both?
She studies and then sneaks out to party when moms aren’t looking
how does the child go on their SATs? do they make it to the SATs?
She does rather well but it’s more a formality. Tink insists she should go to college before she goes on an evil rampage but Fiona isn’t sold
does the child go to prom with their friends, or a partner?
Probably a (very scared to fuck up) partner and all of her friends with their dates
how do the parents feel about their first boyfriend/girlfriend?
SHE ISN’T ALLOWED TO EVER DATE WTF
what are the child’s friends like? do they get along with the parents?
They’re very nice to Fiona and Tink’s faces but get uncomfortable with how touchy feely they still are
what kind of music is the child into?
Bluegrass, to her mother’s confusion
how do the parents and child/ren go learning to drive? is it a disaster, or does it go fairly smoothly?
they probably hired an instructor as I’m certain neither of them are super amazing at driving enough to pass that on to a kid
does the child have a casual/part time job? what is it?
No, school is more important. She comes home and practices magic with moms
does the child hang out with their family, or are they too ‘cool’ now
The family is close so she is still close to them
what’s the child’s personality like?
She’s not a snob but she could easily be considered the queen bee type without being too into the school life
who does the child take after now?
Fiona and her grandmother, Clarion
adult
does the child make it to adulthood?
Of course!
does the child end up in the job/lifestyle they dreamed about? why?
She ends up going into politics, it’s surprisingly easy to move up quickly when you’re so smart and underhanded as she is.
are their any hiccups in the road?
There was a small incident about her parentages but she was able to forge a proper birth certificate
does the child move far away from their family, or stay close?
Probably she becomes a mayor in a nearby town or a senator for Maine
what would the parents prefer?
STAY HERE AND LOVE US BUT.... ;-;
does the child have any significant others? any children of their own?
Of course she does, she marries a nice boy and they MAKE GRANDBABIES
how do the parents feel about being or not being grandparents?
PLEASE PLEASE THEY WANT GRANDBABIES AND VISITS PLEASE
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