#they will call characters “dilf” and it's just a guy in his thirties

[toastedclownery]

Everytime I see someone calling Beebs a dad I have to resist the urge to bang my head against a wall

[delaware-lemme-smash]

Could we have some hcs of reader referring to some of the older MHA men (coughAizawacough) as "beekeeping age" and then they make her explain it? LMAO.

For those who don’t spend all their time on TikTok like I do, ‘beekeeping age’ refers to an attractive older man, usually in 40s/50s. Some of these guys technically don’t apply but we’re putting them in anyway!

Characters: Aizawa Shouta/Eraserhead, Yagi Toshinori/All Might, Maijima Higari/Power Loader, Sasaki Mirai/Sir Nighteye

Contents: The existential struggle of trying to explain a meme to people who aren't chronically online.

Aizawa Shouta/Eraserhead

Age: 31

Yes, he’s only in his thirties, but Aizawa has the vibe of a retiree. He looks like someone who should be muttering “I’m too old for this shit” at any minor inconvenience. In fact, he often does. He’s said it several times today. 

Most especially when you looked over at him and told him that he looks like he’s ‘beekeeping age’. Now, as a teacher, Aizawa isn’t as out of step with popular culture as he might like you to think he is. Even if he doesn’t really bother with social media himself, he has twenty students who are all hooked to their phones like it’s a dialysis machine. He picks stuff up just by proximity, and it’s not the first time he’s heard the phrase ‘beekeeping age’. And while he might have a vague idea of what it means, he’s not just going to let you get away with calling him that. 

He looks straight at you, lifts an eyebrow and asks, “What does that mean?”

Which leaves you floundering a little, because you have to explain to Aizawa that it means you think of him as an attractive ‘older’ man. 

While he’s the furthest thing from vain, he finds himself a little bit offended.

“What the hell do you mean ‘older’? I’m thirty-one.”

“You have to admit, Shouta, you do give off the vibe of a grizzled older man.”

“I’m too old for this shit.”

Yagi Toshinori/All Might

Age: 55+

Toshinori’s the only one who really qualifies for this trope, and naturally, he has absolutely no idea what you’re referring to when you tell him that he’s beekeeping age. He grins uncertainly at you.

“I’m…not sure if that’s a compliment or not, but I’ve always thought that beekeeping looks like a relaxing hobby! As long as you’re not allergic!”

Of course, you take a little pity on him and explain that it means he’s a hot older guy. 

“Oh, are you referring to a DILF?”

Once you’re done spraying your coffee or whatever you were drinking everywhere, you demand to know where Toshinori heard that word and if he knows what it means. Let’s be real, Toshinori doesn’t run his own social media and doesn’t know squat about memes.

“Oh, a charming young lady walked up to me at a signing once and informed me I am what the young people call a DILF. Still can’t get anyone to tell me what it means! Slang these days! Ha!”

I dare you to try and get Toshinori to refer to himself as a DILF in front of Aizawa. Just for the hell of it. 

Maijima Higari/Power Loader

Age: 41

Higari can’t catch a break. Not only is he very short and look a couple decades younger than he actually is, leading to a lot of unfortunate misunderstandings, now he has some whippersnapper calling telling him to go start a beehive. 

He’s probably the only one on this list that actually knows what it means. I feel like because he’s so in line with cutting edge technology that he’s pretty on top of social media as well? He doesn’t seem like the type to lose step with the rest of the world when it comes to these things. So you don’t even have to explain what you mean when you tell him he’s beekeeping age. 

“Buzz off.” 

Sasaki Mirai/Sir Nighteye

Age: 38 

At first Sir Nighteye thinks you’re making some kind of joke. He stares you down, looking rather menacing even while his mind is turning over the phrase ‘beekeeping age’, looking for the pun or the play on words. When he can’t find it, he finally has to admit defeat and ask you gravely: 

“What does that mean?”

Sir Nighteye’s a little put out when you tell him it’s about good looking older men, because he doesn’t consider himself particularly old. Pacify him by telling him that he just gives off the dignified air of a mature man. He might scoff, but he’ll be somewhat more mollified. 

“I suppose I can accept that as a compliment. Although I think you ought to come up with better jokes. That one didn’t even contain a pun.”

[mylifeisfruk4ever]

Johnny Cage had fallen to the bottom.

It was more correct to say that he had hit rock bottom, but it wasn't humiliating enough, so he had dug his life out to get even lower. He was full of debt. His marriage was in trouble, and he didn't even know why.

Sure, he and Cristina argued, but never like this, as if they hated each other. She wasn't willing to live a life that wasn't at the top.

You were one of Hollywood's leading actors. And look at you now, you're mediocre. You don't even have the money to compensate for the lack of talent.

Another sore point: work. Nobody took him seriously. He was just the typical handsome guy you called for the lead male role in a romance movie. It was fine, as long as he was twenty.

Suddenly, at thirty-five, he was too old for those roles. Bullshit: Jason Statham was fifty-six, and women went crazy for him.

Didn't he look like a dilf? Had her beauty already faded? He had thought about a surgical touch-up to rejuvenate himself, which not only had not done what it was supposed to but had also left him a scar, proof of his umpteenth failure.

Jobless, almost broke, with a wife who wanted to leave him and a disfigured face, Johnny would have been willing to do anything. Even acting for an indie production of little importance, as long as they paid him. Only, not a Korean production.

Korean TV series and films are going strong on Netflix, and South Korea will one day take its place among the top producers of entertainment.

But why couldn't he star in something like Squid Game? Or Parasite? Hell, anything would have been better than The God of War and I.

It was terrible, but it was based on a best-selling novel in Korea, and as long as there was a chance to make money, Netflix didn't care about the quality of the product.

Johnny should have refused the first time he read the script. Unfortunately, he was in no condition to turn down a job and had to accept the role of second male lead.

The second male lead was actually a mindless villain, who tortured the male lead and was obsessed with the female lead.

Johnny had cursed that damned script several times, also cursing the screenwriters and the author of the novel, equally responsible. God must not have appreciated the amount of curse. How else can one explain dying and transmigrating into the character he should have played, Johnatan Carlton?

“God, if you are listening to me…go fuck yourself.”

Coming soon...

[bteezxyewriter12]

Mr. Park

~Series Teaser~

Pairing- Seonghwa x Named Reader

Genre- Smut, Eventual Fluff

Teaser Word Count- 600

Includes- Dilf Seonghwa, reader is his daughters friend, *All are consenting adults*, fingering, oral, sex

Notes-

💓👍🏻Joanne = y/n

Yes I use the same name for the female character for every story. I'm that lazy. And I don't like writing in the "you" style. Saw this name and liked it so here it is. Joanne is not the same character in every story....that'd be weird

I've read that some people are uncomfortable with y/n and would rather have an actual name. It's also easier for using nicknames in the stories. Feel free to substitute your name and attributes instead of the character's, since it's meant to be you💓👍🏻

Summary- Mr. Park has no idea what to do when his daughter's friend shows up at his house when his daughter is not there

Release Date- August 3rd

💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥

"Could I maybe get something to drink and use the bathroom? Then I'll be out of your hair"

"Oh yeah sure. Come in"

She smiles, stepping inside and walking to the kitchen

My eyes land on her ass, the skirt just shy of being too high

I groan internally, closing and locking the front door

When I get to the kitchen, she's already sitting at the table waiting, cardigan hanging on the back of the chair

Going to the fridge I open it, "Uh I really only have water and coke"

And alcohol but no way am I giving her that

"A coke is good. Thanks"

I grab her a can and close the fridge, walking to her

I hand it to her and she takes it

"Thanks again"

I just nod

I watch her open the can and take a sip from it

She crosses one of her legs over the other and my eyes watch her skirt ride up, exposing more of her thigh

I swallow, my cock getting hard

This is not a good time for this to happen

I move behind the island in the middle of the kitchen to hide

I'll be mortified if she noticed the bulge

She's never want me

She can have any young guy she wants, why would she want someone in their late thirties?

With a kid, who's her friend

She wouldn't

"Don't let me keep you from anything important Mr. Park. I know where the bathroom is and I can let myself out"

I should leave

Walk out of the kitchen and go back to work I left on the computer

But I don't

"No it's alright. I have nothing to do anyway"

Bunch of lies

"Oh ok", she shrugs

"So uh what notes does Yoonah need to copy?"

"Oh physics. She suck at science. But amazing at math. We exchange notes all the time because I can't stay awake in math"

I chuckle, "Yea I hated math too"

She giggles, "Hence why you're an accountant?"

I shrug, "I got better at it"

"Lucky. I suck"

And my mind immediately goes to the image of her on her knees, her pretty lips around my cock, sucking hard

And my hard cock twitches

Fucking stop, oh my god

"Yeah but your good at science and that shit is so confusing"

She giggles again, the sound making me harder

God I'm horny

And it only happens when she's around

She finishes her coke and gets up to put it in the recycling bin

I move, always keeping myself hidden because of my erection

"I'm just going to use the bathroom then I'll go"

I nod

I don't want her to go but it's for the best

I watch her leave the kitchen and when she does, I lean over and breath out, trying to get control of myself

I need to cut it the fuck out right now

"Mr. Park?", I hear her calling me

I take a breath, then walk upstairs to the bathroom

When I get there, the door is open and she's not there

Where is she?

I look in Yoonah's room but she's not there either

Did she go to the living room?

"Mr. Park?"

My head snaps to my room, the door half open

She's not in there

Right?

No she can't be

Still, I walk to my door

I'm so scared and so excited to open my door all the way

Pushing my door open, my mouth drops, eyes popping out of my head

She's sitting on my bed, her big eyes looking at me