#they said 'i cant take this seriously it feels like a crack fic' like ???????????what do you want me to do about it

[sinningtamer]

i got excited seeing an ao3 comment notif because i updated a fic recently, but nope it's just someone being passive aggressive on an old vore fic of mine because they find it weird. how long are we gonna keep doing this???

[mrzombielover]

soap nsfw alphabet

prepare for some more headcanons while i take some time to write actual fics :)

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

he strikes me as a guy that will just fucking conk out immediately after. if you want to clean up you gotta move fast before hes dead asleep and holding you in a death grip.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

he’s pretty neutral about himself, not really insecure but not the most vain. i bet he likes his arms and hands, he’s a strong guy and likes his mooscles plus he enjoys being able to manhandle you. also proud of his leg gains

on you he likes your hair. he thinks it frames your face real prettily and loves how it smells. will start using your shampoo and conditioner to your dismay

other than that hes an ass man, so that’s probably high on his list too

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

doesn’t have a particular preference for where he should but one time he pulled out and came all over your thighs and ass and he’s not gonna let that image go any time soon.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

chronic panty stealer. i cant really imagine him being ashamed of any kinks or anything but this is something you might not need to know about for a while. he kept a pair hidden in his barracks and freaked the fuck out when ghost almost found it. he returned them later that day

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

one of the more experienced of mw characters, he’s had a few girlfriends and random hookups once in a while but pretty standard

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

prefers intimate positions with lots of skin to skin contact and eye contact. you cant go wrong with classic missionary, but he’ll bend down with his face close to yours and hold you against him. also likes when you wrap your legs around his waist.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

he def has the capability to be silly and goofy and perhaps a tad whimsical. to him, sex with his partner is about making you both feel good and he can be laid back and crack some jokes if the mood is light. not that he can’t be serious, but he likes laughing and not taking things super seriously

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

pretty hairy guy, he’s very clean and i imagine he’d keep things trimmed but i cant see him shaving lol. i bet he has a super sexy happy trail too. pubes are brown and curly like his hair

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

surprisingly romantic- in his own weird way. he can be traditionally romantic, too, if the situation calls for it like on an anniversary or smth.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

tends to quite often when you’re not there, he gets wound up very easily and uses it as a way to let off some steam, and relax before bed

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

usually p vanilla but there are times where he like to step it up. he’s def a switch so when you take the reigns it gets him all excited.

also likes blindfolds, on him and you. just thinks it’s sooo hot how it heightens your other senses and makes you extra sensitive.

the same can be said with temperature play- ice and wax. the different sensations get him so riled up and he loves the little gasps and whimpers it elicits.

Again both of these can be done on him or you this guy is the biggest switch ever.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

prefers classic bedroom, it’s private, comfortable, and you can really go all out without worry. unfortunately, neither of you are home very often, so the showers or barracks are the most common places.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

honestly everything you do. it doesn’t take much to get him going, he has a pretty high sex drive. watching you concentrate on something just gives him the insane urge to annoy you and ruin your concentration, and even more so if you’re actually doing work. especially working with your hands in some way

watching you get ready is another one, smth abt the contrast between how you look in your gear vs all dolled up really does it for him.

basically anything you do

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

hes a very clean guy, hence the nickname. not into piss or blood or a ton of dirt and grime. granted he might find it hot if you’re all sweaty and nasty from a workout or mission but that’s a very specific circumstance. this makes shower sex fair game.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

likes giving and receiving, again sex and making eachother feel good is very important to him in relationships. he can give very enthusiastic head but he’s def not gonna turn down a bj

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

tends to go pretty hard. hes a strong, big guy who can manhandle you and hold you down if needed, and usually goes at a pretty deep and rough pace. can always slow down if you need it tho hes so sweet at the same time

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

though he likes the convenience, especially as you’re both busy people, he much prefers when he can take his time with you and properly go multiple rounds

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

he can be real cheeky and smug, loves teasing you in semi-public situations. he’s down to experiment, mostly to have fun. doesn’t mind doing it if there’s a slight risk but wouldn’t wanna do it like in public

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

absolutely insane. from how much he works out to his relatively clean diet to his high test levels he can go for a while. tends to bust a little prematurely but he makes up for it in how many rounds he can go

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

doesn’t use them a ton but he def sees them as an ally, not a threat. prefers using them on you but he’s not opposed to them being used on himself aswell

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

very much so, but he also enjoys being teased. if you’re in a meeting he’ll love to have a hand on your thigh trailing dangerously high while you’re talking, trying his hardest to break your focus and embarrass you

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

he’s def on the louder side, not afraid to be whimpering, groaning and grunting all in your ear and it’s so fuckinf sexy he reminds me of those memes like “other dudes be afraid to moan in bed but i’m in my girls ear like”

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

has threesome/gangbang fantasies with you and the guys from 141, but he would literally never say anything to any of the guys nor you cause he’s worried about making things awkward with them. he could maybe maybe consider asking ghost

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

oooh do i have thoughts abt this 😭😭

so very thick and long. not the biggest (my man könig) but it’s very substantial. 6-7 inches hard and if the length doesn’t get you then the width WILL it feels like you’re getting SPLIT. base color #a95840 with a slightly lighter and redder tip

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

very. it doesn’t take a lot to get him going and on a good day he can go 3 rounds. whenever you’re in the mood, he’s in the mood and ready to go.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

as previously stated after he busts you got like 2 minutes before he’s knocked the fuck out and probably pinning you down with him. he can’t help it he’s so content and warm and he’s just gonna wanna take a nap

+ i plan on doing the rest of 141 and könig versions too :)

[gayometer]

Can u do the reader in the fic “such happiness in such dull place” be someone who loves to bake and cook for their loved ones and who has a incredible regeneration and healing powers, but if they use them too much they get tired and sleep for a whole day continuous and might get seriously sick but they cant help to not use their powers on anyone who is in pain.

Thank you!

But I just can't help it!

Let's ignore the fact that I don't remember my own titles and had to look for it-

💚Ask💚

Listen, now Odin isn't an overprotective parent but he does have his limit.

You baking and cooking is already worrying him to the point he'll put Loki in charge to watch over you in case you get burned.

Odin has put rules in place to make sure you don't overuse your regeneration and healing, but you being far too kind has lead you to be in the infirmary more times then he'll like.

He knows you can't help it, but he swears he feels his hair going grayer everytime you do it. He won't prohibit you from doing it, but please, just listen to him and don't use it so often.

"Just cause someone is in pain doesn't mean you should heal them, you could get extremely sick"

- Odin @ you for the 96th time that month

Now onto a different topic, Odin quite enjoys the sweet and savory things you make, yes he worries more then he'll admit about you being so close to fire but he does like anything you make.

No he won't share.

Yes he will kiss the chef, on the head cause that chef is the sweetest being in Asgard.

Hunnin and Munnin also get nice bowls of meat you cook, but they ain't important.

He sits on the counter everytime he's in charge of you while in the kitchen.

He also gives you pointers for what spices to add so he's not just staring into your soul.

Loki isn't a baker so he just watches or grabs any console he brought with him and plays games.

Don't think he's not watching you tho- cause he is

Loki will make sure you're not hurt, he might be a trickster but he knows plenty about taking care of others.

He won't admit it but he gets far too worried and imagines the worst case scenario whenever you use your healing on others too much. He has cracked before in front if others, but pride be dammed cause his sweet and kind little sibling is sick.

On a lighter note, if you just get tired he'll put you to bed.

Now, Thor isn't an emotionless war head who only feels happiness when he finds a strong opponent. In fact, he can be one of the most gentle gods when it comes to you.

He doesn't know anything about a kitchen (he put a lemon in the microwave to "make the sour go away") so he stays clear of that.

It's not that he doesn't trust Loki, I mean be doesn't but he will admit Loki knows more about a kitchen then he does.

However, if you ever get an interest in gardening, he's the one to go to.

Thor knows how sick you can get when using your abilities, yes he does worry but he knows you'll be fine because the nurses and doctors in Asgard will do anything to make sure you're fine. After all, no one would want his father to be furious.

Thor would also teach you the basics of self defense. You definitely won't need it but better safe then sorry, plus it's his way of making sure you're fully prepared for anything.

Again as many others have said, Thor isn't good with his words, so he'll spend time with you to show that he indeed lives his little sibling.

[suffarustuffaru]

What are your least favorite ships? Not counting Subaru x one of the minors (i sadly have seen some around)

whew...... least favorite ships..... now thats a bold question HAH and i may have some. ah. Bold answers hah.

im generally pretty open to most ships, its just a matter of like. either i already liked the ship / was really into the ship or im more neutral about it and you just gotta convince me why i should at least give it a shot or be like "this could be good in certain circumstances". i dont usually care if a ship is toxic or "problematic" per say bc 1. this is rezero and sooo so many ships in this show arent 100% healthy lbr and 2. i will like a ship if its like. complex, and if theres problematic stuff, then its done for a reason - like it's not just there willy nilly. but thats just my personal feelings on it yep!! :o fiction is different from real life and all that.

more under the cut!!

that being said like. you know, kinda like you said - the obvious answers would be like subaru x any minors and just any sort of incest ships bc like. i do not see the point of it. that and you know, like a lot of people, i tend to avoid these sorts of ships with 99.999% of fandoms im in. i aint here for incest or shipping adults with minors. and i know theres like fandoms like game of thrones where this sort of thing IS relevant in the story, but with rezero - like it just is not relevant here and adds nothing unless youre into that. i do get that fictional stuff is different from real life and its not necessarily an indication of someone's character. i also definitely know this bc ive cowritten a gluttony if selfcest fic for this fandom as a very extreme crack treated seriously story hahh. but yeah like. ships between family and adult x minor are Not For Me in this fandom. i dont feel like it adds anything to the story and its also like Really out of character.

granted, i cant really say much on that bc ive written and posted selfcest for this fandom but like. in my defense, i did way too much research for that fic (..............i researched a lot of psychology stuff) and also gluttonybaru is Canonically Not Normal about subaru. the more you think about gluttonybaru the worse he gets HAH. like. dude has canonically kissed subaru via emilia's book of the dead....................

but obviously ofc i do not condone any of this ^^^^ in real life.

anyway on a lighter note!! im not a huge fan of most ships between subaru and *insert a female side character here*. like im not a big fan of like. subaru x anastasia, subaru x priscilla, subaru x elsa, subaru x yorna, subaru x pandora, like... the list can get kinda long bc people in this fandom in certain english spaces like to ship him with like any girl ever, it feels like sometimes. it gets to the point where sometimes i feel like subaru is just the self-insert to be shipped with women that people have the hots for.

like with most content about these sorts of ships, its hard for me to see much point to it - and there IS potential there. there is almost always potential in so many different tropes and ships, and theres some cool fanart in this fandom with these ships!! but you know, i hear about people suggesting ideas with these ships or writing fic about these ships and its just not my cup of tea bc it really sacrifices the characterization of all these women. and elsa is like already sexualized enough okay and its almost never nuanced and taking into account her backstory :( like i could be convinced to ship these ships with like idk 20k to 200k words of relationship and character development, but as it stands i personally really dont like them hah ;-;;; and also priscilla is clearly more into women okay (she canonically talks about how men are only allowed to fantasize about her and nothing more or she'll cut off their heads!!) and anastasia seems more into like julius and priscilla so like. HAH.

subaru x crusch is not something im a big fan of but im pretty open to it hah, i just havent seen much fancontent about them that really piques my interest :,)

anyway i also just. dont like the idea of taking a gay subaru ship and genderbending only one of them due to homophobia. and ill emphasize and underline that last part - due to homophobia - bc ive seen really good genderbend subaru content in this fandom where subarus afab and shipped with like julius or reinhard or something and there was clear effort and passion put into it!! and i do think its interesting thinking about how genderbend aus would affect this sort of thing for sure <3 i really really enjoy seeing the well made genderbend aus in this fandom!!

but i see other people suggesting fic ideas or making fics sometimes where its like fem subaru x male side character or like now-fem side character x subaru but it like its only clearly done bc some people just cant ship a gay ship, they gotta make it straight and then not put effort into thinking how this would change more things. and the female character in the duo now is Especially terribly out of character :(( the homophobia is just so so irritating to me. i go on the fic reddit thread sometimes and i see stuff like. i think once i saw a thread about someone requesting ottosuba and someone else immediately went "oh, with femotto right!!" like. ...... please. they are a gay ship :,,,))))))) let them be gay Sometimes at least!! maybe we can genderbend both of them sometimes??? :,)))

also on a less serious note HAH ok like..... ok hear me out, dont kill me for saying this either, but - fredotto. frederica and otto. and - ok dont get me wrong, i think theyd be really really interesting for multiple reasons, right. and ive seen some cute fancontent on them that i liked a lot!! so i really do think they have lots of potential!! like theres the obvious "otto had a crush on a cat as a child and frederica's a cat demihuman", then theres the other obvious fact of otto and frederica being connected via garfiel being their brother/brother figure, and also like personality/temperament wise they could bounce off of each other in interesting ways but like.

the thing with fredotto is that i feel like in english fandom its treated as the "more likely" otto ship to happen, at times. which is Absurd to me after studying otto's lore way too hard bc not only is this dude just way too obsessed with subaru (like regardless of whether you view it as platonic or romantic or not, ottos like Down Bad either way LMAO i just dont see him having eyes for anyone else at this rate)... but also otto OPENLY ADMITS that he'd be bad in a relationship with a woman. like im really sorry but frederica would probably be Too Good for him. and he would Know That.

otto………. can you specify what “the most important thing” is. like do you mean ONLY your career or—

anyway so its like. you want me to believe that otto "i could never be in a relationship with a woman as i am now" suwen. could date a woman????? right now???? i dont think so LMAOO. like i would feel BAD shipping a woman with otto bc barely anyone deserves otto, ok. idk you might be going "suffaru arent you kinda mean to otto" but like being an otto fan also means being his biggest hater and dude is just super super cringe. and even if he had a crush, the chances of him voicing it is Probably Low.

like ships like fredotto, again, need like idk maybe like a few thousand words of development At Least on both ends, bc frederica?? we barely know anything about her at the moment, so its Really hard to approach a ship like this in an in-depth manner right now. like id love to explore fredotto!! id love to learn more about frederica!! id love to go crazy with this ship!! but yeah its definitely kinda hard bc we barely know anything on frederica :< :( and yeah once again. i think shes too good for otto. i think almost every woman is too good for otto. if youre shipping a woman especially with otto you gotta jump through hoops to Really convince me on this HAH. bc i think shipping him with men is just gonna lead to two different possibilities (codependency. and/or otto trying to femme fatale his way through life 👍)

yeah anyway jokes aside. fredotto at worst feels like just a case of pairing the spares and like Clearly they must only be in a straight ship or something HAH.... like i would love to read/write extensive relationship development on them though ;-;;; they got good potential, youd just have to put in the work for me to Believe that they could happen ;-;;;; but most fredotto english fic content atm is just them already being a Thing in the background like ;-;;; this would Not Happen from either of them without development!!!

also i have some fredotto tumblr posts floating around with what i Think would be fun to do with their dynamic…. idk where they are rn hah but yep i think they got potential :,) !!

anyway HAH i hope you did not mind reading about my least favorite ships in this fandom bc this is everything thats coming to my mind now 👍

[thumpersdae]

🧠 😅🤗

🧠: pick a character, and I'll tell you my favorite headcanon about them.

I'm not sure which character to pick, (choosing a jodie headcanon felt like a cop-out… no pun intended) so I lurked on your blog for a sec and found "Scary Marlowe was in your "posts alot about" section. so we're going with her. I think my biggest most, undebatable headcanon for Scarry is that I see her as a fat girl. I know that isn't super deep, or exciting but it's the most concrete hc I have about her.

To make up for that I will add that, at the end of s1 I tried to make playlists for the S1kids-S2parents. and ended up gravitating to poetry for Terry Jr's playlist. because of beth and because sometimes being a teen with a step-parent means listening to button poetry on youtube and feeling profound and forlorn.

So now I sorta have this HC that TJ had a big poetry phase at about Scary's age and he's just itching to share some of his favorite poems with her, but also he's aware that sharing outdated angsty poems with his teenage daughter would be quite possibly the most un-cool thing he could ever do. but he did once leave a poetry book out without telling her it was his. and Scarry has poured over that book several times 😅: what story or scene you've created that you're a smidge embarrassed exists?

ok… so, I really sort of don't feel embarrassed about any of my fics. I know each one of them was a thing I loved working on, and was proud to share. and even the things I was writing as a teen, when I was worse at writing, remind me how much I've worked on my writing skillzzz.

that being said,,,, in 2014, I wrote my second fan-fic ever. (against my better judgment) I will link it here. please be warned the word count makes it hard to load on some devices, and the payoff is not worth that frustration. 🤗: what advice would you give to new fanfic writers that are just getting started?

I genuinely would like to tell all new fan-fic writers "don't take yourself seriously" the culture around modern fan-fiction has made it so this creative writing is one of the few artistic outlets that cant be commercialized. and I fucking love that actually. I love having a thing I can pour my heart into that doesn't need to be sellable. it took me a while to realize this about myself and there was a time when I spent a lot of energy and angst trying to write for clout or influence. do not do this. I know it's cliche but please "write for yourself". write crack fics, and shitposts, and rare pairs, and the same "identifying marks" soulmate au 50 times. abandon things that aren't working anymore, stop writing altogether for months at a time. this hobby is work, just like any other time-consuming creative endeavor. it's volunteer work, with no monetary gain, but that doesn't make it rewardless. but tyeing those rewards to other people's reactions rather than your own enjoyment is a good way to have the joy sucked out of this hobby. yes, i love the comments and kudos and attention i get from sharing my work, and interactions like that have factored into me being motivated to write more. but one of my other driving forces for writing is just reading over my old work, and then wanting to pin down the endings.

[fairy-pd]

Asa Emory but he's not that bad

GN reader, sort of a crack fic cus I cant take his avocado mask seriously, sfw but really dumb lmao

notes: i wanna simp for the bug man without feeling guilty so Im gonna deviate from the 2009 and 2012 cannon slightly and defend this version of him till I die. Picture Juan Fernandez's Asa cus that's who Im talking about muah muah goodnight

So in my head, Mr. Cockroach is just a silly little nerd. A goofy fella with social anxiety. He is the definition of a poor little meow meow- smart but pathetic, a self absorbed mess

Picture a pinscher with a cold. That's him

He has managed to get himself to pretend he's somewhat well adjusted, but even tho he can make small talk, buy groceries and order pizza from time to time he still comes off as cagey and awkward

Definitely kept dead bugs in jars in his room as a kid, did not expect them to rot, learned nothing from this experience and still does it

Which means he smells bad. But purposefully now

I think Asa identifies as a bug tbh, but not literally

He loves humans like you maybe love cars, or art.

He doesn't relate to people. He doesn't get what's like to be one. But he loves us so much, he admires us so much, like you admire a vintage Lamborghini in perfect conditions.

He loves us from afar, like an admirer, an outside observer, wanting to learn everything about us because he doesn't understand but loves how strangely endearing we are, like the entomologist he is. Its almost like a fetish, but not sexual- objetification meets cold adoration in the hands of a scientist

This is specially noticeable (like another poster said) when we see various scenes where he's gently craddling his victim's faces or taking "care" of them. He looks at them in awe, like he could (cus he really could) break them, he wants to see them break to learn one more thing about them

He sees his victims not as people, not as complex universes, not as concepts, but as animals. He understands you have a life and opinions and friends, but he compartmentalizes these as normal behavior for your species

He cannot physically take his headphones off during the day cus it's so fucken noimsy outside and it hurts his ears

He likes to listen to anything repetitive and loud, nothing with discernible lyrics

His house looks like one of those ikea display rooms, except it smells faintly like formaldehyde and rot

He has a massive sweet tooth

He has a love for psychology, human anatomy and thanatology

Actually any field of knowledge that could explain human behavior is fair game to him

He absolutely hates spending money in "unnecessary" things, which is why he has plenty of diy projects around his place

He doesn't really have an opinion of people or of himself. He isn't one to judge, to classify people into groups. He thinks we're all fascinating, and he spends a lot more time trying to teach himself things about us than thinking about his own life

He doesn't have an internal voice inside his head

Absolutely has a God complex, but more in a "I Cannot Relate To Any Of My Beloved Creechures" than "my milkshake is better than yours"

Has a degree in entomology, and chose to become a certified bug serial killer cus seriously,,,,ppl will just give their house keys to a stranger for days????? how could he not take advantage of that????

100% a virgin. Does not have any interest in romance or sex, does not understand most people's need for it, could not feel more uncomfortable than when his victims offer to "help him" in exchange for their freedom

Never had any friends

Was raised by his extended family who sent him off to college as soon as they could

His favorite place in the whole wide world are cemeteries (silent, and he can spend time with his beloved lil humans as much as he wants)

Never takes anything personally and is completely unfazed by morality. Again, whenever anything happens he just sees it as part of the behavior of this particular species, like he isnt an active participant in the world, just a bystander

Hates pillows. His bed is as firm as a wooden table (might actually be one), only wears blankets when its absolutely freezing and he has no other choice

Walks around either on all fours or on his tiptoes

He doesn't? really? get? why people hate his trunks so much. He finds small spaces quite soothing and attributes his victim's screams to panic or anxiety of being caught, not also cus they're yk stuck in a tiny box with no chance of getting out

He has quite a few "animalistic" quirks, like the growling and purring thing. Some come naturally, some he picked up from his early subjects when he was a student

Knows how to crochet, and how to sew up small tears or holes in clothing

[mid-weast]

Will you keep it down? | Jeon Jungkook

Summary: You and Jungkook attend the same university and have been neighbors for 3 months now. It drives you crazy that he plays loud music at 2AM, and it drives him crazy that you barely acknowledge his presence.

Pairing: Jungkook x Female!Reader; Black!Reader

Words: 2.6K

Genre: enemies to lovers, student!jungkook, student!reader, fluff, mention of smut, angst? (in the form of bickering back and forth).

Authors note: Hi hi! This is the first fic I’ve ever written so if it’s bad I’m sorry. Also it is unedited so if there's grammar / spelling mistakes I'm sorry again! Also this is catered toward the reader being Black but I hope it can be enjoyed by everyone. Thank you for reading! Feedback is appreciated ok love u bye!

“Y/N? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??!? Open this door RIGHT NOW!”

Even though you were studying in your room, his knocks were so loud you nearly jumped out of your skin. You had expected a reaction, but not a full-on explosion.

You and Jungkook have been apartment neighbors for about three months now, and a constant problem is that he blares his music hella loud late at night. Of course he’s a music major so he listens to music a lot, but at this point you don’t care. It doesn’t even seem like he’s working on composition homework anyway, just being an asshole with no regard for his neighbors peace. Now don’t get yourself wrong, you're not just some uptight bitch who complains about everything. Well, you do have several pet peeves but over the years of going to school in Korea you’ve picked and chosen your battles very wisely. In most cases you let things slide. You wouldn’t care at all about someone playing the music loudly, but it is 2 AM, and while you’re up studying you know a lot of your other neighbors are trying to sleep.

You tiptoe toward your front door and twist the knob slowly. You only open the door wide enough to be able to see his face. It’s not that you’re scared that you’re in danger or anything, and you rarely back down from people giving you a hard time. But you were tired, wearing a big ass t- shirt and short shorts (your regular sleep attire), and it was late at night. So if anything was going to pop off you felt pretty vulnerable. Even though you’re the same age, he towers over you and you find his size kinda intimidating.

As usual, you have to crane your neck to see his face, and your view of him is limited by the narrowness in which

you opened the door.

“Can I help you, lil boy?”

From what you can see of him, right away you can tell that he is pissed. Dawning his usual attire of a black sweatshirt with the hood up, black sweats, and stomp a hoe boots, he stood extremely close to your apartment door with his arms crossed. His usually wide, puppy dog eyes are now pressed in narrow slits. His normally pouty lips are formed in a hard line, and his jaw is so clenched you could carve an ice sculpture with his jawline.

"Who the hell do you think you are? You called the cops on me? Are you INSANE???" Jungkook shouts.

Obviously he's mad, and despite the amount of times you've gone back and forth he's never raised your voice at you. The old you would have screamed back at him, but over time you've tried to respond to anger with calmness. Also, you were a little scared because this mf is kind of big.

"I already told you if you keep blaring your music at 2AM, I was going to do something about it!" You respond in a hushed whisper, slightly concerned that your elderly neighbors will be even more disturbed by the noise. "I've told you this a million times, and you barely do anything about it. If anything, it's gotten worse like you're doing it on purpose. People are trying to sleep and I'm trying to study, why is this so hard for you to understand?"

He sucks his teeth. "You're such a little snitch. And I've already told YOU that YOU can't tell me what to do."

"I know I can't...but they can," you nod toward the exit, referring to the police officers that most likely just left out that way with a tiny smirk growing on your face.

If it was possible, he clenched his jaw even harder and you think that he's going to pop a blood vessel. He pushes his way into your apartment, which sends you stumbling back and you grab the door handle to regain your balance. This causes you to close the door shut.

"Hey! What the hell do you think you're-"

He steps right up to you and leans down into your face.

"Who the fuck do you think you are, seriously??? Why are you such an annoying little brat? Just because you're a nerd with no friends who gets no play doesn't mean you can take your bitterness out on me.”

You have to laugh in his face at this point because hello??? First of all, who is he talking to? Second of all, you have told him a BUNCH of times to turn his music down late at night. You didn't think that was too much to ask. As far as you were concerned, being aware of your noise level when you live in an apartment is the universal bare minimum for being a human being.

"ME? Who do you think YOU are? Actually let me tell you. You're an entitled little rich boy who thinks he runs the world. I don't give a fuck about how popular you are on campus, how many people fall at your feet to be around you, and how many hoes you have, you cant talk to ME like that. And how are you going to try and tell me about myself when it's too much of a task for you to be a decent neighbor? I've never done anything to blatantly bother you, so why can you just.." You started to panic because usually when you raise your voice out of anger, your voice cracks and tears threaten to pool out of your eyes, but you tried to get a grip and not back down..."why can you just be nice to me so we can live in peace? Is that too hard for you???"

He looked kind of taken aback by your question. Being nice to you? It never crossed his mind. Also, you kind of had a point. When the semester started and you both moved in on the same day, you would shoot him a small, friendly smile in passing but you never seemed interested in getting to know him. He always wondered why that was. It's not that he had a problem talking with girls, since all he had to do was breathe and girls would come flocking around him, but you would flat out ignore him. Even at all the major parties at the beginning of the year and on Thursday nights when students take over the clubs in the city, you'd barely even acknowledge him. He KNEW that you had seen him too, since you would make eye contact, but you acted like he was just another guy at the club.

And he'd be lying if he said you weren't fine. You had thick thighs, a beautiful face, nice curves, and always wore outfits that hugged you in the right places. He always wondered what it would feel like to wrap his arms around your body and press it against his own. He would constantly sneak peaks of you throughout the night at the club, but something stirred in him when he saw that you were chatting up other guys. Was he...jealous? Jealous that you were so eager to pay attention to these dudes who, in his opinion, were decent looking but they were nowhere near his level, and you never even gave him a second thought? One night he even saw you leaving with a man he knew through mutual friends, and he had to physically stop himself from breaking the glass he was holding, because that guy, while objectively handsome, was nothing compared to him. Jungkook wasn't blatantly cocky, but he let his talent, charm, and looks speak for themselves. He was THEE Jeon Jungkook, and nothing ever really bothered him....except you.

Was he....interested in you? Nah, that can't be it. You were some random chick who happened to be his neighbor, who also is one of the only girls he's met that doesn't give two fucks about even having small talk with him, and that infuriated him for some reason. So the first time you came knocking on his door in an adorable pink satin pajama set with a matching bonnet complaining about his loud music, he knew the game he had to play.

He's still standing over you, centimeters away from you face, but you notice that his eyes soften a little and so does his jaw. He unclenches the fists he was holding crossed against his chest

You continue, “I don't care what you do, and I'm DEFINITELY trying to run your messy ass life. Believe me," you scoff, "you don't have enough money to pay me to do that. But when your dickhole behavior fucks with MY life is when it's a problem. And it's BEEN a problem."

He rolls his eyes. "Whatever, little girl, maybe I should call you little mouse now, since now I know that you'll go squeaking to the cops now, don't fuck with me or my music again.”

Without moving your head you look him up and down with a confused expression. "Am I supposed to be scared of you? No seriously, you look like you cry during Disney movies while wearing footie pajamas, and now here you are throwing a fit because I forced you to stop bothering the entire wing with your music?"

Girl...what are you saying??? This man just barged into YOUR place, is in your face, and is strong enough to pick you up and throw you, and you’re insulting him? But you figured if he's going to be rude, you'll throw it right back because you're tired of his bullshit.

Whatever softness he was feeling for a fleeting moment immediately left, and annoyance once again washed over. He straightens up a bit and puts on that annoying confident smirk he wears when he thinks he's won arguments between you two.

"You should be nicer to me, all it will take is for me to tweet one thing about you, and you'll be the most hated person on campus."

At this point, any suspicions that you had about him annoying you on purpose were confirmed. You've concluded that this mf is a bully and you, small and shy but not one to take mess, will put him in his place to-motherfucking-night.

You take a step toward him, now crossing your arms tightly against your chest, but he doesn't even move a hair backwards.

"Clearly you need a rude awakening so here it is. I don't know what type of people you've dealt with all your life, always saying yes to you, letting you boss them around and taking whatever bullshit you dish out, but let me tell you I am not the one. Never have been and never will be. Unlike the other fools around here who cream their pants at the mention of your name, I don't care about who you are. You'll respect ME and MY peace as long as we're neighbors, you get me?"

Now y/n, you have never so boldly stood up to someone, where did that come from, babes? You've tried to not let this entitled little boy get to you this whole time, but with him standing in front of you in the middle of your apartment with that extremely annoying, yet handsome, smirk on his face, and after all the crap he's said tonight, he had you all the way fucked up.

After you said that, he just laughed and looked away. Now you’re standing there fuming and confused...was there a joke you missed? You were being dead serious!

"Something funny?" you ask, narrowing your eyes.

"Nothing, just thinking about how I want to face fuck that annoying little mouth of yours so you finally shut up.”

Your jaw almost dropped to the floor. You've never had a guy say something so blatantly rude and vulgar literally inches away from your face. But again, you weren't going to back down.

"Oh really?" Scoffing and tilting your head to the side a bit while narrowing your eyes even more, "I'd very much like to do the same. Maybe then you'll learn your place."

"Oh please, princess, you probably blanch when someone around you even mentions the word sex." He chuckles and leans down close toward your face again and cocks his head to the side, scrunching his nose and in a pouty voice said, "you're fooling no one, but keep trying, maybe you'll get there.”

You're even more annoyed than you were before, if that was even possible. But if he wanted to play this game, you might as well go there with him. It's true, you were a bit more prudent than more, but it pissed you off that he could tell. Regardless, you do know some things to say that could have him leaving with his tail between his legs.

You pouted your lips and in a babying tone said, “Aww sweetheart you have no idea. You think you're big and bad but like I said, you probably cry watching Disney movies. The same way you'd be crying, begging me to let you cum down my throat as I mercilessly toy with your cock for hours.”

Now it's his turn to go pale. Y/n, his stuck up neighbor who has barely even spared him five seconds of her time just threatened to edge him into submission? He has to pinch himself because he must be dreaming....

“Well I-“

“But I don't even think we’d make it that far, hun” you continue, “because in order to humble your egotistical, disrespectful ass, I'm gonna have to ride your face until you suffocate. And when the paramedics come and I have to explain how you died, I won't even hesitate to tell them that you were a punk ass loser who LITERALLY drowned in my pussy!”

You don’t know who this person speaking is, but it is not you. All of the pent up hostility you’ve held towards him just flooded out of you and you couldn’t stop the words from coming out. To be honest you shocked yourself, but you still stood there with your arms crossed and your face unfaltering, just waiting for him to say something smart back.

He stared at you silently, eyes wider than you’ve seen before and his mouth hung slightly open. He wasn’t expecting you to respond with so much fire, but now he wouldn’t be able to sleep until the image you painted came true. His brain said fuck it, and his lips crashed down onto yours. The kiss is sloppy but passionate, and you swore you heard him quietly whimper.

When he feels you starting to kiss back, he smirks into the kiss. Your lips are moving against each other in tandem, and all thoughts about how much you despise the prick fades away. As you uncrossed your arms and placed them on his chest, you could feel his heart beating wildly. Was he as nervous as you were this whole time? You wonder. You knew he was a player, so he was experienced. But the thought that you made him nervous gave you a tiny confidence boost. His hands slowly slide up the sides of your body to sneak behind your back, to pull you further into his chest. As much as your brain was telling you to resist him and push him away, you couldn't help but fall victim to how soft his lips felt against yours. Suddenly you feel airborne as he swiftly reaches down behind your thighs and picks you up. You instinctively gasp but he doesn’t miss a beat, simply biting your lower lip and locking your lips together again.

“Maybe we should test that scenario of yours, and if it comes true, that wouldn’t be the worst way for me to go” he says, doing that annoying but soul-crushingly handsome smirk he likes to wear as he carries you off to your bedroom.

[everythings-a-feather]

ok so now that we have the whole season I redid the tier list (I belive by @polkadotbrat)

and very quick thoughts, these were supposed to be a sentence each but I couldnt help myself

ma poule tier- its all the felix episodes cuz I am only invested in him at this point) strike back may be my overall fav this season cuz I was torn between wanting felix to be the dog and the peacock but strike back let me have my cake and eat it too also ik that felix giving hawkie the whole miracle box is like an awful betrayal or whatever but the miraculous zoo is gone thank god tho the ladynoir moment had me feeling empty and I just cant empathise with marinette at all at this point because none of the things she actually fucked up this whole season blew up in her face she just got played by felix and honestly good for felix. Also isnt lucky charms whole thing "it gives you what you need not what you want" and it pointed at felix, when Marinette could have picked up Adrien from the past TM before risk was active instead of Felix whos just unaffected. tho maybe its just that in Felix the episode its established that he can throw with dead accuracy so the lucky charm lead her to felix because hes good at throwing??? idk man ML is weird with this stuff

silver medal- Psychomedian almost made it to ma poule because ladynoir my formerly beloved but as my investment in them as of end of season 4 is dead its getting knocked down a tier. Crocoduel, purple tigress my beloved. Glaciator 2, Marichat shenanigans were very fun. WIshmaker, I like luka in this one and if the show pretends ephemeral never happened and he gets to do actual things I might actually like luka overall. Rocketear, angst my beloved, spawned good fics, detective nino was funny.

did something for someone- Gang of Secrets, eh honestly idc but the adressing of Marinette being stressed is nice, Hack-san, I liked scarabella and chats dynamic, please let there be canon bridgette so that felila is guaranteed to never happen tho canon bri will also need a personality shift (maybe be more Lawful Good than she already was to balance Felix being chaos energy?). Optigami- smart plan ig. Mister Pigeon 72, all it did was convince me that it should have been Marigami and Lukeadrien not Adrigami and Lukanette tbh, Hawkmoth x Mr Pigeon my... I wanna say crack ship beloved but I seriously think Feluka could work and Im not sure if theyre aware of each others existence since Luka isnt in Adriens class (Im not rewatching "Felix" to confirm this). Sentibubbler, congrats Alya stans? closest to being in the next tier

(un) bothered- Dearest family, I had hopes but the episode is eh. Furious Fu- Order of the guardians should have stayed dead. Guilt trip- Marinette... please Adrien almost has this covered. Penalteam, eh, powers underutilised here, tho I really like Penalty. Megaleech, SAMG was wasted on this episode. Truth and Lies- (total deadpan) oh no Lukanette and Adrigami the two ships we saw develop so much on screen and I was completely emotionally invested in and that the NY special didnt tell us broke up immediately after they started dating, seriously tho I cant take lukanette seriously as a pairing and Adrigami has potential but im kinda eh also Kagami literally has the "I will lose the love triangle" hair so.

Incredible anger- EPHEMERAL MY BELOATHED "BUT I DONT LIKE CHAT NOIR" GIRL WDYM WE SEE THE WAY YOU TWO LOOK AT EACH OTHER LUKA SPEEDRAN MY BELOVED TO MY BELOATHED EPHEMERAL LOOKED UGLY THE WRITERS DIDNT UNDERSTAND WHY PEOPLE LIKE CHAT BLANC. Kuro neko, almost everything @parismystere has said about this episode, I was clowning and hoping it would be a "adrien I need you to be a temp cat while I find Chat Noir" while Felix is in town idc about the middle but Adrien does tell felix he is chat so Felix as adrien says "oh well I happen to know chat noirs identity-" and gives the ring back to adrien while also solving the "we cant reach chat cuz no one knows his identity" problem cuz 'Adrien' knows who chat is, also this would tip them off to something fishy going on with Felix' well... Id say betrayal but for that Felix would have had to have been on their side and Felix doesnt seem to be interested in LB and CNs miraculous anyway. Sole Crusher and Queen Banana- Zoe my beloathed, also Id watch Chloes movie over whatever garbage they were actually filming any day, a chaotic bad movie is always better than a boring one.

I couldnt finish Qilin or simpleman and I dont wanna waste energy on them

[bakatenshii]

Grapefruit

Oikawa Tooru x reader (haikyuu!!)

word count: 2.3k

TW: 18+, lemon, wattpad, crack

A/N: I’m so sorry. This is actually a joke, a parody, I promise, it’s written like this on purpose for the collab. Terrible (or lack entirely of) grammar, dialogue so cheesy I threw up multiple times in my mouth, too many specifications of shades of the colour pink. For @undermattsun’s whorehouse wattpad garbage fire collab. I’m so sorry.

grape·fruit

/ˈɡrāpˌfro͞ot/

In the world of fandom (check out fan fiction, fanfics, or fics), a grapefruit is a story which consists of sexual explicit themes in bizarre situations.

An orange-twinged pink, almost coral.

haikyuu series!! :3

disclaimer: haikyuu does NOT belong 2 me. Or else I would make XXXX go w/ XXXX ;)

༻✧༺

𝑝𝑎𝑝𝑒𝑟 𝑏𝑎𝑔𝑠 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑝𝑙𝑎𝑠𝑡𝑖𝑐 ℎ𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑡𝑠

𝑎𝑙𝑙 𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑏𝑒𝑙𝑜𝑛𝑔𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠 𝑖𝑛 𝑠ℎ𝑜𝑝𝑝𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑐𝑎𝑟𝑡𝑠

༻✧༺

“hurry up y/n!!!” - i remove my skullcandies out my ears, hearing my best friend sunnie(with an ie! not y!) shout to me from down the hall.

flipping my baby pink (NOT cotton candy pink! god there’s a difference, get it right. last week ash-lee with her stupid bleach blonde hair called it cotton candy pink and I wanted to kill her) hair behind my shoulder, i skipped down the lockers.

i was in my best outfit, checkered pink and white (bubblegum pink, this time) leg warmers with my matching pink + white skirt and white denim jacket with a pink butterfly bedazzled on the back. i saw paris hilton in it on her myspace too, so you could say im pretty trendy.

not like the other girls, like brittney (with her dark hair with a blue streak with a puppy shaped purse she swears is designer.) or ash-lee with her stupid ugly blonde hair that’s deffo fake. oh i already said that

anyways

it’s just an average tuesday morning, and i’m just your not-so-average girl. my name’s (y/n) (l/n) and im (age) years old. my best friends are sunnie, rachelle, and meeky. oh, and lindt, sometimes, when she’s not too busy with trying to save the world from global warming.

i’m on my way to p.e. which UGH is my least fav class, who even came up with it? but at least there’s the hottie oikawa tooru-sama in my class (ha! eat that ash-lee + brittney) and all the girls luuuuurv him. he’s soooo hot i bet he has abs

(brianna with the ugly hair who wears green shoes with red socks said she saw him change once and she totally saw his 8pack but she’s a liar so i dont believe her)

(even tho he tooootally has one)

i was on way just skipping down the hall to go to p.e. when someone crashes into me from behind.

‘-u-GH!’ i fall.

‘hey!!!!’ i turned around to yell at who’s bumping into me-

it was oikawa tooru-sama!! the most popular boy in school!!! i felt like i was in a dream i pinched my hand but... it hurts!!! this isn’t a dream!!! the oikawa tooru-sama just crashed into me!!! with his body!!! his shoulder touched me!!!!!

he turn and looks at me and... my heart stops. i think im dying omgomgomg

‘a-are you okay (y/n)-chan?’ he asks me and holds his hand out.

i cant believe it. the oikawa tooru-sama is giving me his hand to hold?!?! is this heaven???

‘i-i-‘ i stammer. i’m so shocked i swear my face is beat red. ‘i-i’m ok.’

i was too scared to hold his hands because mine were so sweaty from seeing him this upclose. i stand up and dust my knees because i want him to think i’m tough. that’s right. oikawa tooru-sama is a professional vball player! (v for volley-ball) he’s not going to like some dumb average weak normal crybaby girl.

‘ok. see ya in class!’ he smiles and waves at me before walking down the hall, shooting me his signature smile. the one that makes flowers bloom around him and glitters around his whole body.

h-how did he know? did he just say in class??? the oikawa tooru-sama knows who i am???

i take out my phone to frantically text my bffs (sunnie, rachelle, meeky and lindt) and see the group chat had some unread new messages. i click open it.

(beep)

𝚋𝚕@𝚑𝚔𝚞𝚐𝟶𝟶: omgzzzz i juss saw tsukki-sama xDDD

𝕣𝕒𝕖𝕖𝕖𝕖𝕩𝕠𝕩𝕠: STDU XDD wut wuzz he wearin?!? hes sooooo hawt oh em geez

tsukki-sama, aka tsukishima kei-sama, is the hot blondie in the other class’s vball team. rachelle and sunnie are sooo in love with him, but i don’t blame them. he’s soooo tall, taller than oikawa tooru-sama even. (but that doesn’t matter because oikawa tooru-sama has the prettiest smile in the world and no one’s seen tsukki-sama smile like... since he came outta the womb)

i quickly type out my txt because this is more important than what the blonde vball star is wearing.

(beep)

𝖗𝖆𝖜𝖗𝖇4𝖐4: guizzzzz guizzzz GUIZE!!!! GUEZZ WUT JUSS HAPPND!!

𝖗𝖆𝖜𝖗𝖇4𝖐4: u’ll nv beliv it!!!!! omGZZZZZ IM LAIK DYINN XDDDDDDD TT_TT

ｓｋ８ｅｒｇ１ｒｌ: omgawd wuuuut

ｓｋ８ｅｒｇ１ｒｌ: w8 kita-sama jus sk8dd by me i fink he haz a new b04rd!!!!! be are be

𝖗𝖆𝖜𝖗𝖇4𝖐4: uGGGHRRR MEEKY DIS IZ MOAR IMPOARTAN!!!!!!

before i have the chance to tell them about my fateful encounter with the oikawa tooru-sama someone snatches my phone away. i turn around, maybe it’s oikawa tooru-sama again?

UGH NO IT’S OUR STUPID BALD PRINCIPAL. now i’m in trouble.

‘no phones in the hall (y/n) (l/n)-san!’ he yells at me. his breath stinks, yuck.

he takes my phone and puts it in his pocket and i realize that he’s putting it in his pocket and taking it away.

‘b-but-‘ jimmy i protest. not my flip phone with my pink bedazzled hello kitty charm on the end!

‘no buts!!!! see you after lecture missy!!’

god, this is just like, the worst day ever.

༻✧༺

𝑖𝑡’𝑠 𝑔𝑜𝑜𝑑𝑏𝑦𝑒, 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑤𝑒 𝑔𝑜𝑡 𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑚𝑜𝑟𝑒 𝑛𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡

𝑙𝑒𝑡’𝑠 𝑔𝑒𝑡 𝑑𝑟𝑢𝑛𝑘 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑟𝑖𝑑𝑒 𝑎𝑟𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑑

𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑚𝑎𝑘𝑒 𝑝𝑒𝑎𝑐𝑒 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑎𝑛 𝑒𝑚𝑝𝑡𝑦 𝑡𝑜𝑤𝑛

𝑤𝑒 𝑐𝑎𝑛 𝑚𝑎𝑘𝑒 𝑖𝑡 𝑟𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡

༻✧༺

p.e. is the same as always: im sitting on the side, not doing sports because girls like me can’t risk breaking my perfectly painted pink (hot pink, not baby pink) nail with diamonds on it. i tell my bffs about the encounter and they all agree that it’s deffo fate.

‘i know right??’ i giggle staring down at the man of my dreams, at his chocolate brown locks, thinking back at his dreamy brown orbs staring into my dark black ones offering me his hand.

‘you should totes ask him out!’ giggles sunnie.

‘oh em gee, never!!! that’s sooo embarrassing, he’s totally gonna say no!’ i said.

‘seriously, (y/n)-chan, what do you have to lose?’ rachelle said.

‘just like, my dignity and self respect.’ i reply sassily.

at that we three burst into laughter, and the fat p.e. prof turns and tells us shhhhhhh.

i love my friends.

i tell them about our bald principal taking my pink flip phone with the hello kitty charm on it away.

‘oh no!’ rachelle exclaimed.

‘what are you going to do?’ sunnie asked.

i shrug, feeling at a loss without it.

‘it’s like, seriously dangerous without a phone.’ the blonde said.

‘what if you get like, kidnapped or something?!’ the purplenette said, clasping her hand over her mouth in a show of shock. (ps. bluette vs. blunette?)

‘kidnapped?!?’ i laugh. ‘who’s gonna kidnap me?!!’ we all burst into laughter again, causing our p.e. prof (still fat and annoying) to shhh us again.

little did i know that the brunette vball star was staring up at me, plotting.

i had no idea what was about to come.

༻✧༺

𝑡ℎ𝑟𝑜𝑤 𝑖𝑡 𝑎𝑤𝑎𝑦, 𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑔𝑒𝑡 𝑦𝑒𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑑𝑎𝑦

𝑤𝑒’𝑙𝑙 𝑚𝑎𝑘𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑔𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑡 𝑒𝑠𝑐𝑎𝑝𝑒

𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑤𝑒 𝑤𝑜𝑛’𝑡 ℎ𝑒𝑎𝑟 𝑎 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑦 𝑠𝑎𝑦

𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑦 𝑑𝑜𝑛’𝑡 𝑘𝑛𝑜𝑤 𝑢𝑠 𝑎𝑛𝑦𝑤𝑎𝑦

𝑤𝑎𝑡𝑐ℎ 𝑖𝑡 𝑏𝑢𝑟𝑛, 𝑙𝑒𝑡 𝑖𝑡 𝑑𝑖𝑒

𝑐𝑎𝑢𝑠𝑒 𝑤𝑒 𝑎𝑟𝑒 𝑓𝑖𝑛𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦 𝑓𝑟𝑒𝑒, 𝑡𝑜𝑛𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡

༻✧༺

when i open my eyes, my eyes are heavy, staring up at a bright light above my head. i squint my eyes because the light hurts my eyes.

‘well, well, well’ i hear a voice behind me. ‘(y/n)-himesama’s awake, i see.’

wait-

i know that voice-

that’s-

that’s the oikawa tooru-sama’s voice!

‘w-what?’ i stuttered, surprised but feeling a warm rush going down my body at the sound of his voice. ‘what’s going on?’

he chuckles. ‘can’t you tell?’

i look around and see my arms taped up behind me on a chair and my legs tied together by... something. rope maybe?

‘where am i?’ i ask, even more bewildered.

‘tsk tsk tsk, silly (y/n)-himesama. i’ve kidnapped you, my dear.’ he said. ‘we’re in my mansion right now’

my eyes pop out of their sockets. am i hearing him right?

‘no,’ he corrects himself. ‘we’re in our mansion.’

i can’t help but blush at that suggestion. our mansion?

that’s right, i must be crazy, i think to myself. this is all just a dream, i’m still in school, on the bleachers with my bffs and i fell asleep in our class.

‘this isn’t a dream, darling’ he singsongs, and i feel more warmth flood downwards. god what is wrong with me? turned on in this situation? but can you blame me? who wouldn’t get turned on when the oikawa tooru-sama is standing in front (or behind) them and calling them ‘darling’?

‘w-what- h-h-how?’ i ask him. ‘i was just at school, staring at you play vball in the gym- i mean n-not staring at you- and-‘

he chuckles darkly.

‘i know you were, (y/n)-himesama. that’s why i kidnapped you, because you’re so cute.’

i blush at his words. m-me? cute??? did the oikawa tooru just call me cute?

i suddenly remember what rachelle and sunnie said in p.e. today about being kidnapped, and shudder. god, h-her mind! they’re totally gonna tell me i told you so! when i tell them.

‘b-but, h-how?’ i bit my lip looking at him beneath my lashes, or however anastasia steele did it in too many shades of grey. (it wasn’t actually that bad, but ill never admit it. it’s sorta kinda hot. also pantone says theres only like 37 diff shades so.)

‘i saw you with your friends, and i served a ball at your head knocking you out.’ he explained. suddenly i feel a pang on my head reinforcing what he’s saying.

‘ow...’ i say quietly.

the brunette man built like a god walks into my frame of vision for the first time after waking up and i notice he’s shirtless, all 8pack exposed for me to look at.

(i guess brianna was right, but she’s still a liar that wears green shoes with red socks.)

he comes up to me and kneels in front of me until he’s kneeling in front of me. he carresses my cheek with his hand (the same one he reached out to me earlier that day, pre-kidnapping) and i sigh.

if this is a dream never wake me up. i think to myself.

‘wh-‘ before i can get the words out asking him why me?, he presses a finger to my lips, shushing me.

he looks at me with his brown chocolate orbs, and i get lost in them, counting the stars and constellations in those glowing beautiful orbs that i never thought i could look at so up close. (except in photos i secretly took)

‘i love you, (y/n) (l/n)’ he says.

i fainted.

༻✧༺

𝑡𝑜𝑛𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡 𝑤𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝑐ℎ𝑎𝑛𝑔𝑒 𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑙𝑖𝑣𝑒𝑠

𝑖𝑡’𝑠 𝑠𝑜 𝑔𝑜𝑜𝑑 𝑡𝑜 𝑏𝑒 𝑏𝑦 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑠𝑖𝑑𝑒

𝑤𝑒’𝑙𝑙 𝑐𝑟𝑦, 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑤𝑒 𝑤𝑜𝑛’𝑡 𝑔𝑖𝑣𝑒 𝑢𝑝 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑓𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡

༻✧༺

i wake up (for the second time that day, god what is up with today?), my eyes still heavy.

‘good morning, darling,’ i hear a voice say, and suddenly i remember everything that’s transpired so far.

(for reference: i crashed into the oikawa tooru-sama this morning, had my phone taken away, and now kidnapped by none other than the oikawa tooru-sama, now in his- no, our mansion.)

‘o-oikawa tooru-sama?’ i stutter out weakly, still groggy.

‘just tooru, my hime-sama.’ he says and i feel my body heating up again.

suddenly, i’m filled with an overwhelming emotion, and the worlds spill out before i can stop them.

‘i love you, t-tooru.’ i stutter on the foreign name, biting my lips (for good measure).

he looks at me, chocolate orbs piercing right into my super dark black pupils, and he starts to cry. i cry too, because he just looks so beautiful, even when he’s crying.

he holds me in his arm and i nuzzle my nose into his neck, smelling his deep chocolatey velvety sweet minty musky scent. he smells so good i could just stay here forever, bathing in the chocolatey velvety sweet minty musk.

‘u-um...’ i start, and he nuzzles his face into my neck some more. i can feel his wet tears on my shoulder... is he still crying??

i try again. ‘u-ummmm...’

he finally looks up at me and i peer into his deep chocolate orbs, feeling him stare intently into my dark block orbs. i wiggle my arms to show him i want him to release them, because if you remember they’re still taped up by like, tape or rope or whatever.

‘o-oh!’ he exclaims and unties them.

i don’t know what came over me but suddenly we’re kissing, our tongues are battling for dominance within our hot wet cavernous mouths, and it’s soooo hot.

he grips my legs and spreads them apart, tongues still fighting a mighty battle, and i see him take out his big massive rock hard member in his hands.

i wrap my legs around him, thankful for the pink (bubblegum pink) and white checkered skirt im wearing today for easy access, and he pushes his hot shaft into my core. i can feel his member in my wet gushy wushy pussy and it feels so good i came.

he cums too.

‘w-will you marry me?’ he looks up at me, his member still inside. i feel tears brimming in my eyes again as I nod.

‘i do.’

༻✧༺

𝑤𝑒’𝑙𝑙 𝑠𝑐𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑚 𝑙𝑜𝑢𝑑 𝑎𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑡𝑜𝑝 𝑜𝑓 𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑙𝑢𝑛𝑔𝑠

𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑦’𝑙𝑙 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑘 𝑖𝑡’𝑠 𝑗𝑢𝑠𝑡 𝑐𝑎𝑢𝑠𝑒 𝑤𝑒’𝑟𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑔

𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑤𝑒’𝑙𝑙 𝑓𝑒𝑒𝑙 𝑠𝑜 𝑎𝑙𝑖𝑣𝑒

a/n: ta-dah!! the end!!! tankzz 4 readin guyzzzz lawl im thinking of making dis a series so... ;))) tell me who u wana be kidnapped by next! xD

a/n #2: speshull tankz 2 uwucatgirlprincess99 4 da line (u kno da one ;))) + sk8erg0rl666 4 havin me in da collab! + also cummin up wiv da title!! lawlzz rawr x)))

a/n #3: OH WOW . erhm. Longest chappy thing ive written. Hope you liked it. so uhm. ENJOY ! [btw, I'm considering doing the NEXT CHAP; sneak peek thing. Should I? :3 Comment?] plz R&R!! :]]] kudoz 4 u <333

p.s. da colour i used 4 da lyriczzz is fuschia pink! :3

p.p.s. comment below if u reconize dee song!! ur a kool kat if u do ;))

[batarangsoundsdumb]

yet another ask dump yeehaw!

do you ever think that jay's mother was one of those bitch who believes in horoscope and tarots and things like that and so he believes in these things too, or it is just me projecting?

sheila haywood took one look at jason's birthchart said 'nah this won't do' and left.

Wait, but what happens when the justice league does find out that Bruce and John fucked? Lmao it sounds like it would be hilarious, really, I don’t want a justice league that doesn’t make fun of Bruce for like his entire life.

barry runs out of the meeting immediately and comes back with an entire sti testing kit. diana fully seriously wants bruce to get tested while bruce is sitting there like 'come on guys, you're being ridiculous, i already checked twice'

john is standing in the corner clearly offended while bruce is just like 'don't even say anything, constantine, you fucked a shark'

tim was like "i'm drake now" and everyone was like ahh so your fursona is a dragon and tim was like pffffft no. ducks.

on the one hand, good for him, on the other hand, bro, how do you still have a secret identity when your superhero name is just your last name,,,,

Your fic on ao3 was GOLD PLEASE CONTINUE I loved Dinah's cameo btw ( @purple-vixen

thanks so much! i already continued but this ask is like 10 years old because i'm a notorious procrastinator (also yes! i love dinah so much aahhhhhhhhhhhh)

I've FINALLY been watching the Batman animated series and I gotta say, after watching "the gray ghost" I am CONVINCED that Batman is a closeted super hero geek who was 100% freaking out the first time he met Superman and is just REALLY good at hiding it.

bruce internally: holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit bruce externally: get out of my city, alien

AHHH ur multimedia fic is the only thing that brings me happiness anymore continue it forever pls

uhh thanks, but can't continue it forever because my attention span is that of a toddler on crack on a good day and i can't function without at least 10 things going on at the same time and music in the background

Oi, so I'm getting into dc and watching batman the animated series, and they use fruitcake a lot. Which I thought was very funny and wanted to share w you - Denilla

wait like fruitcake (food) or fruitcake (derogatory) ?

young justice 🤝 teen titans slut shaming batman

tim drake and dick grayson to their respective teams 'you guys stop it, that's my dad'

Happyhoganon: If an eighty year old Batman had fought crime in Gotham City for decades and the only threats to him and the city lately are a wheel chair bounded Penguin, your usual purse snatchers and a few con artists popping up every now and then, how well could the Dark Knight do in maintaining the peace in Gotham despite him being just somewhat fit to do that as an elderly man (which says A LOT given how old he is)

uhh he'll probably do what my grandpa does and that is ruthlessly prank them until they die of shame.

in the death in the family interactive movie there's an ending where Jason is tasked with raising Damian and he decides he's gonna raise Damian to take down the waynes and al ghuls which uh maybe isn't great BUT the idea of Jason raising Damian... PRICELESS. CHAOTIC. I just need more people to know about this :)

yes i saw that wow holy shit but jason would accidentally drop damian on his head one (1) hour in and jason just yeets him into the lazarus pit.

Headcanon: The Penguin has a really hard time fighting any of the Robins because of his avian obsession means there's always a small part of his mind that's like "Birb. Child. Protect" ( @subspacecadet )

as soon as dick becomes nightwing the penguin is like 'you know what, fuck this dude' and shoots at him.

Y'all talking about King Shark dating Constantine, let's not forget about John literally hooking up with Satan

listen there's a clear difference between monsterfucker and satanfucker in that king shark is literally a shark and satan still looks like a normal dude

Does everyone in Gotham think Batman is a teen dad?

everyone in gotham thinks batman has been around since gotham was founded, but they do think that bruce wayne is actually a teen father and dick grayson's biological dad.

why. why would you do that fancast when you know it will only hurt people

what? i loved my fancast it was really well done. i did it with good representation in mind and i really managed that with alfred pennyworth being ✨italian✨

Seeing james charles a jason gave me psychic damage how dare you i need to wash my eyes

well that's a you problem isn't it?

do you think dick grayson thirst tweets about nightwing just to annoy his family/cause problems on purpose in general?

he thinks nightwing is hot, next question.

holy jiminy cricket batman, its as cold as the good lords ass crack in here!!

i- what? this is why i don't fuck with english expressions it's way too goddamn weird

Brooooooo, your teen dad!Bruce au is soooo good. I've got brainrot.

Honestly if you ever write anymore, I'd read that shit twice. Sign me the fuck up. Good stuff, Good Stuff.

uh yeah i'm thinking about writing a fic, but i have exams coming up and i don't wanna fail because that would suck. but after i'll certainly be writing more tho

your teen dad AU is so great! bruce acting like a big brother for all of like a week before he's telling everyone about his son. what if in the AU dick meets the JL because they need to rescue him? maybe he's in trouble/kidnapped at a gala and bruce starts calling for JL. clark finds him and has to fly with dick to bring him home - that's how dick and clark meet and superman becomes dick's fave hero. he goes around the manor thinking he can fly with a red blanket draped around him like a cape.

actually- if you want a young dad! bruce fic with like that kinda stuff(just with damian) go check uhh- in for a penny by cdelphiki. it's really good and bruce is like 24/25-ish. (and dick's there!!!)

This account has solely convinced me that Tim is a trash goblin ( @hamilcat-and-magic-turtle )

because he is. that boy has slept in dumpsters on multiple occasions even if he is the son of a billionaire.

Okay but when you said victory dance I did think of the whole justice league defeating the big bad and then they all start flossing

well that's exactly what hal jordan does and that's why batman uses a gun now. no but the victory dance in my opinion is like the 'we're all in this together' dance from high school musical.

The horrors in Invincible s1 was nothing compared to the comics, I cant wait for s2

oh well okay, i mean i personally react to horror and violence by laughing awkwardly so i can't wait to be called a monster for accidentally laughing at a mass murder.

I'm currently watching Batman: The Brave and The Bold and- Bruce is just talking about Oliver like he's an old love (@nightwings-kid)

okay im going to watch that lmao that's totally and completely in character for him tho.

The invincible comic is like super gratuitous with its violence so much so I'm shocked the show was able to adapt it in a faithful way! Anyway had the show been live action it absolutely wouldn't have the same impact as it does as an animated show and I'm so glad so many people agree with me on that

also because a live action casting would've been like uhh amanda stenberg for amber, the dude- the guy from the supernatural but with a mustache for omni-man, and scarlet johanssen for debbie grayson

Debbie grayson is a milf, yes. You're welcome for the invincible propoganda, now you can questions your life. Bruce def seems like the perfect father next to Omni-man. Like they really took a rip off justice league and I was like well, now I'm attached even tho I was like hah I know who they're supposed to be. And then bam- death gore death gore gore gore sad Mark grayson just had to have daddy issues. Why does every character have daddy issues. I'm sick of the attacks

because daddy issues make a person arguably funnier, that's why i'm not even remotely funny (haha good dad flex). i liked that it was dark contextually, but not in the colouring, bc i hate when it's like 'uh yeah graphic murder and now a shot so dark you have to sit in a dark room and squint at the screen to faintly see the characters. (like dcau ugh)

About the Wayne insurance, for a moment I thought you would put the video with moans over the waves.

i mean- i could've done that, but rick rolling seemed more family friendly.

Its the first time in forever that im surpise rickrolled, i usually expect it. Congratulations (i really should know better this is tumblr)

i get rickrolled so often but i actually like the song so i dont really give a fuck

Actually, my information about Damian and John's kids is outdated because it was revealed that the old men telling the kids stories about the Supersons were actually Jon and Damian the whole time. I was blinded by my thirst for Grandpa!Bruce Wayne but I was wrong... I liked my version better, tbh (@artemisa97)

fair enough. but i'd honestly like to see damian and jon getting together, just because it's a really fun dynamic and their friendship was really cute when they were kids. (also idk maybe it would be nice to have one (1) main batfam/superfam character that's not cishet)

How am i JUST finding your blog skdskfkd you're so fucking funny and ur takes are hot

i thought u were calling me hot :( but youre not :( crime detected (but lmao thanks)

So I have depression and I swear that your memes are one of the few things that have made me laugh so thank you 💛🥺 (@katekanebadass)

aw you're welcome, and i hope you're doing okay!

The metropolis memes are so funny, I love them 💀😌

i think metropolis is also so fucking funny it deserves more attention imagine having your entire police force being upstaged by an alien from kansas and his kids

as an american i feel your complete lack of knowledge of us geography is just so sexy (platonic) ❤️

thanks so much (i also don't know any other geography, i'm not kidding, like you can tell me you're from hungary and it will just blank, there will be nothing that comes to mind)

In the DC universe they don't say "Can't have shit in Detroit" they say "Can't have shit in Gotham"

this just reminds me of that guy whose porch got stolen like the steps to his door, and i'm thinking of people living in gotham and waking up without a front door and going "can't have shit in gotham"

honestly all i know about chicago is the bean, so. what would gotham's famous sculpture be?

gigantic gargoyle statue in front of one of the police precincts because a villain thought it was a smart way to keep the police inside, but it's too heavy to move.

why tf do people go on about how batman "works alone" or how he's the "lone wolf" when he like 38290202 members in his family

bc people think it's cool that a grown man in his 30s has no friends or family instead of calling it what it is (sad)

Bruce is gotham's sugar daddy

why would say something so controversial yet so brave.

my favorite batfamily fanfictions are the ones where they use their shitty codenames, unironically, in any context

dick: gerard way are you in position, gerard way are you in position

tim: for the last fucking time, my codename is 'totally not count olaf' this week, abbafan 3000

dick: shut up my codename isn't 'abbafan 3000'

dick: it's 'abbafan number 1' and you know it

I have a feeling Tim drake is ur favourite batfamily member but okay u don't have favs if u say so ok

i mean he is, i won't deny it. but i love each and every one of the batfam just the same, i just have a weak spot for short dumbass nerds, because i'm a short dumbass nerd.

Omg i fuckin love boy meets world too fam shsjkfk

bro boy meets world was the shit!!! it was just fire and awesome and so fucking great like bro. it was so good im not even going to be accepting criticism

you know I find the whole "joker completes batman" thing a bit disgusting considering the horrendous stuff the batfamily went through because of the joker and let's not get started on the "joker has a point" thing like yeah he's this cool complex villain but he's absolutely batshit crazy

like yes! i get what you mean the joker just fucking sucks man he doesn't do shit for batman's character or the batfam he's literally just annoying as fuck. like the joker has a point' shit is so stupid. i will accept 'magneto was right' because he fucking was and i think he didn't do anything wrong, but joker? he's just like that. he's not even cool and complex he's just a weirdo with a bleach kink at this point.

ALSO YOUR RACISM POST- SO TRUE BESTIE

thanks bestie, i'm glad you agree.

in today's essay of why I think cass should become batman- I was thinking Tim would probably be the most efficient batman in many ways but I also think he wouldn't want to be batman tbh none of the batfamily members would want to be batman because they're trying to outgrow him but cass is the one who wants to represent the symbol that is batman

absofuckinglutely i will say it again and again that cass represents the batsymbol more than anyone in the batfam, in batgirl (2000) she literally didn't care about anything else than bruce's oath to not kill, she thought the batsymbol was more important than anything in gotham. she's just an excellent character because her motivation to not kill is not 'i'm scared i can't come back from it' or 'well my dad says no murder so i'll go along with it' but that she's killed somebody as a young child and she never wants to kill a human ever again and that's so fucking beautiful for a new batman like yes.

need more cass, duke and tim inclusion in gothamite memes

yes yes, a tall order of cass, duke and tim coming up in 1-14 business days

oldest to youngest batfam members cus I'm confused as shit

okay order of being taken in: dick, jason, tim, cass, damian, duke order of age: alfred, bruce, dick, cass, jason, tim, duke, damian (though cass and jason are around the same age general consensus is that cass is a little older)

I'm so confused Steph is a redhead?? like how was it that hard to get this right? the source material is literally right there and free

cw is jared, 19

do you receive anon hate? if so, how do you deal with it

uh no, i'm not remotely popular enough to get anon hate and i also don't say a lot of things that would attract anon hate, but i do send anon hate to @the-real-peter-parker because he forgot about the specialists from winx club

Wait how many languages do you speak??

uhh- 5 if you include latin, but that's a dead language and i'm really bad at it. but english, my native language, german, and french also, tho german and french not fluently.

You can mix aguaepanela with aguardiente 😈 and is tasty

okay but now i'm curious if the liquor deserves the 😈 emoji or if that's a you problem. but i googled it and it looks like something you'd take one sip of and then not remember the rest of your evening.

[pkg4mumtown]

Consign Me Not To Darkness (Ch. 2)

Summary: Being trained by the maverick Jedi meant you had a looser view of the code than most Padawans did, but how well would that serve you when no Jedi were taught how to love?

Pairing: Qui-Gon/Reader (Gender Neutral)

Rating: M (to be safe because of Chapter 1)

Warnings: Age Gap, Angst, Fluff, Gender Neutral Reader

A/N: First Qui-Gon centered fic! It’s finally here and I hope you all enjoy. Thank you, Nura, for the request <3.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

The bed was far too cold without Qui-Gon in it. The man was basically a personal radiator for you to wrap yourself around, making his absence all too prevalent. Then, there was the matter of the lack of communication that only made your chest hurt every time you thought about it. Still, you got up for the day, knowing your amount of rest was growing suspicious until you remembered that no one was there to wake you. Meditation probably would have done you well, considering your emotions, but you didn’t want to dwell on them at the moment.

Quite the opposite actually.

A quick snack and extended training session later, you still couldn’t feel Qui-Gon anywhere. On your walk back to your room, you saw Master Windu leaving his own, probably on his way to a meeting.

“Master Windu!” You called out to him to get his attention.

“Padawan, what can I do for you?” He asked once you caught up to him.

“Do you know where Master Jinn is? He disappeared yesterday and didn’t mention where he was going…”

“He asked for a solo mission and left early this morning. He said you had some studies to catch up on to keep you occupied,” Mace recounted. “Will that be all?”

“Y-Yes, Master Windu, thank you,” You bowed to him and back tracked back to your room.

A solo mission? Studies? What a load of bantha fodder!

When you got to your rooms, you immediately tried to comm him, but the signal was never answered. You felt emotion welling up in your throat, something you knew wasn’t a good thing. You tried to take deep breaths through your constricting throat, keeping your tears at bay and releasing your emotions into the force like a good Jedi. It was far harder than it should have been.

That night you slept in your own bed to keep the reminder of Qui-Gon’s absence away.

A tenday later, as you collapsed from another grueling training session, you felt a familiar presence just barely entering the temple. You sat up from the floor and looked around. The room was clean, cleaner than it had been in a while with not much to do but train and clean. Hopefully, he didn’t notice the dark circles under your eyes from a lack of solid sleep.

“Qui-Gon!” you greeted excitedly when he arrived, but instead of greeting you back with the same vigor, he brushed passed you.

“Padawan,” he murmured, dropping his bag near the door.

“Why didn’t you tell me you had a mission? I was looking for you for hours…” you asked but received no answer. He kept walking like he’d never heard you, keeping his back to you. “Qui? I miss—,” you reached out with your arms to hug from behind.

“Stop,” he murmured, his voice cracking slightly. He took a step further from you, “I can’t do this anymore.”

“Do what…?” You asked slowly.

“This anymore. Us,” he stressed.

You heart dropped into your stomach, your throat constricting as if someone had taken all the air from your lungs, “W—wh—hy?

“I cant keep pretending like I don’t hate myself every time I think about this gap between us, Y/N! I’m twice your age!” he leaned heavily against the small kitchen counter, not even having the decency to face you.

“B—but, we’ve talked about this! I don’t care!”

“I know, but… I do. I just—I can’t. If you’re going to break the code, break it for someone younger, someone better.”

“You’re being ridiculous! You said that our love was light! That the Force willed it!” You snarled back, your frustrations starting to manifest rapidly.

“I know what I said, Y/N! Stop fighting me on this!” He growled impatiently. “You have no idea how I felt watching you spar with that other Padawan, like my control was slipping. I’m a Master for Force’s sake. I felt like a disgusting, jealous old man!” Qui-Gon practically spat. “We’re done. I knew this was a bad idea as soon as I reciprocated your confession,” he said dismissively, running a hand through his unruly hair. “I knew you were…too young,” he stumbled over his words as if he was forcing himself to say them out loud for once.

Your chest ached at his words, the emotion continuing to choke you up. You couldn’t breathe or control your emotions. You felt something dark and suffocating simmering below the surface but tried to push it down as far as you could, but it was hard and the rage was threatening to burst from your chest. Your nails dug deep grooves into your palms as you clenched your fists, the pain barely registering through the dark clouding your mind. No doubt, by the way his shoulders tensed, he could sense the darkness through the bond, as well.

If he could affect you like this, then he was right. Neither of you could do this. You were practically choking on the dark side already. You heaved air in your chest and stormed out of the room, only letting your tears fall briefly before you remembered your surroundings in the Temple hallway. You walked aimlessly, or you at least thought you did. With each step away from him, the darkness eased back as you did your best to release the emotions.

You had no idea what was going to happen, now. He wouldn’t go to the Council and accuse you—you had as much incriminating information as he did—though it was his word against yours, but you also couldn’t continue learning under him with the darkness this close, you knew that much.

You stopped, faced with, the newly ranked, Master Fisto's door, a familiar, calming energy on the other side. He was one of the Jedi who had found you long ago, only a relatively new knight at the time, but you had regarded him as an important person ever since, akin to an older brother.

You didn’t even have to knock before his presence slid the door open before you, sensing the distress radiating off of you just on the other side of his door.

“Young one, what’s happened?” His hand came up to your shoulder, his neck bending to look you in the eyes better.

All you could do was choke on another sob and he was not so heartless as to leave you standing there. Kit brought you in for a hug to try and calm you down.

“You need to tell me what happened, your emotions are…” He trailed off, not knowing how to describe them.

“Out of control—I know,” you croaked. You took some steadying breaths, “I…Qui-Gon…I—I love him, Kit. We—”

“Stop…stop, I understand. The less I know, the better,” Kit sighed loudly.

“I don’t know what to do, I can’t go back there, I can’t continue under him. I—I felt the dark side, Kit, I was so overwhelmed…”

“But, you didn’t fall, and that’s the most important part. That is a trial in itself, even if the Council will never know,” he reassured you.

“Can…can you finish my training? I can’t even look at him…” you scrubbed your face harshly.

“I—,” Kit sighed, “We can talk to the Council tomorrow, but he will have to be there to relinquish his duty as your Master.”

You let out a shaky sigh and finally pulled yourself away from Kit, “Okay.” You wiped your face from any more remnants of tears. “Can I sleep here?”

“Be my guest,” he gestured to the spare room.

You let out a sigh of relief, moving toward the room quickly.

“On one condition,” he stopped you in your tracks. “Meditate with me.”

“I don’t want to meditate right now, Kit,” you gritted out, the irritation getting the best of you. Qui-Gon always wanted to meditate the bad away and you didn’t feel like doing anything he would have done at the moment.

“You might not want to, but you need to,” he urged more firmly.

You growled softly under your breath and spun back to face him, “Fine.”

You found a comfortable position on the floor with Kit, feeling his hands grab yours. You let him in, feeling his mind caress yours on the surface, just enough to sense the swirling darkness. His force reeled back slightly when he realized how bad it was, but pressed on, helping you release a lot of your anger. It helped, but it wasn’t a permanent solution. You couldn’t solve everything by just releasing your emotions, you couldn’t forget the words Qui-Gon had slapped you with. As you struggled to work through the emotions, one thing became clearer as the dark subsided: If you wanted to be a Jedi, you had to let Qui-Gon go.

When Kit was satisfied with the darkness being brought down to a simmer, he finally let you up. He couldn’t let you face the Council with that much darkness clouding you. One of them would surely pick up on it.

“He does morning meditation at six, so I’ll go and change then,” You sighed as you made your way to the doorway.

“Do you want me to come with you?”

“I don’t want to trouble you so early, I’ll survive,” you shrugged. “Thanks again, Kit,” you passed through the doorway into his spare room.

After a night of fitful sleep, you blinked your eyes open when the sun was barely coming up. Glancing at your comm, you knew Qui would barely be getting up to head to morning meditation, so you waited another half hour before getting up. He would definitely be gone by then.

“I’ll be back, Kit,” you called out to his closed door.

“Wear something clean, please!”

You heard him shout back just before the door closed behind you. You rolled your eyes at his attempt at teasing, Kit really was your rock when you were struggling; things you wouldn’t dare admit to Qui-Gon during training.

You hesitated before swiping your keycard, seriously hoping Qui-Gon wasn’t still there. Alas, there was only one way to find out. The apartment was eerily quiet as you stepped in, which was a good sign. You made a beeline for your old room, quickly yanking out your least wrinkled tunics and tabards to quickly change into.

You had just finished cinching your obi around your waist when a voice you did not want to hear broke the silence.

“Padawan?”

You froze while adjusting the obi, quickly gulping and straightening our your tabards to make sure they were flat. You offered him no answer, not sure you could actually speak without falling apart.

“Y/N.”

When you were satisfied with your appearance, you finally turned to face him as if you just noticed the tall oaf for the first time. He hadn’t even gone to morning meditation. His hair was still down and mussed from sleep, a loose tunic hastily pulled over his chest, and pants hanging loosely from his hips.

“Oh, Master Jinn, pardon me,” You tried to speak in your best Jedi-like tone, but the waver in your voice gave you away.

“About yesterday…” His eyes were downcast, he couldn’t even look at you yet he wanted you to listen.

“Not to worry, Master, I’ve got it all sorted out,” you answered dutifully, your lip wobbling slightly as your throat threatened to betray your feigned confidence. His brows strung together, his head finally coming up. Qui-Gon’s eyes were just as red and puffy as yours, but you couldn’t be sympathetic when his words had cut so deeply. “I’m meeting with the council today.”

As if you’d just told him you were about to detonate a bomb, his eyes widened comically, “Wai—”

“Not to worry, Master Jinn, the atrocities you’re imagining won’t be discussed. Though, I’m sure they will call upon you for questions, so do try to be in the area,” I plastered on a fake smile. “Now, if you’ll excuse me…”

Before you could push past him he took you by the elbow, making you turn your head away from the contact lest you start bawling then and there.

“What are you doing?” He asked, his back hunched over in your direction, his eyes trying to search your face for answers but you kept your face hidden in the other direction.

“What’s best for me,” you stated and ripped your elbow from his hold. “For both of us.”

You stood in front of the Council with your head held high. Kit stood somewhere behind you, letting you take the lead on the explanation. Your eyes actively tried to avoid Master Yoda’s curious gaze, like he’d be able to read every thought in your head if you so much as glanced at his piercing, inquisitive eyes.

“What exactly are you asking here, Padawan L/N?” Master Windu questioned, his frown deepening with every passing second.

“To be reassigned to a different Master until I’m ready for the trials, Master Windu,” you stated like it was a normal occurrence that Jedi did.

“Under what reasoning?” Master Mundi spoke up.

“No confidence, Master.”

“This is preposterous, we can’t just vote out Masters like senators,” Master Mundi scoffed. “Jinn has unconventional methods that the Council doesn’t agree with, but that doesn’t mean we can just take away his Padawan for seemingly no reason,” he addressed to the rest of the Council.

“I don’t feel that I will be ready for my trials if I continue training under Master Jinn,” which wasn’t a total lie, you wouldn’t, and would be more likely to fall if you stayed with him. “The force has guided me to this conclusion, Masters, it is not something I’m taking lightly.”

“Replace Master Jinn, who will?” Master Yoda hummed.

“I spoke to Master Fisto before the meeting, Grandmaster,” you gulped, staring just past him at the windows.

“Master Fisto?” Windu questioned him.

“I will graciously accept Padawan L/N if the Council wills it,” Kit bowed.

“Talk to Master Jinn, we will,” Yoda hummed, squinting suspiciously at the situation.

“Very well, Grandmaster. I believe you’ll find that he shares the same sentiments that I do.”

Chapter 3

[daimonhalos]

Aight this is the second time I watch it but I'm gonna do a commentary on the latest bad's lore stream! Just for funsies, I might have honestly already forgotten some stuff so I wanna keep my thought process :3 let's go, commentary under the cut.

There's also some small theories/analysis in some points but nothing too much, just me rambling cause pain.

The pre stream song. Faster and Bad never change please.

I love so so so much the ominous soundtracks he puts as background for lore man it's just so coooool.

Reality check pre/post lore my beloved 💜

that little meh eh eh. is everything

he's just on a boat at night and but can already see he's got shaders on, this means PRETTY VISUALS AHEAD. Also i really like bits beginning with the character alone heading towards their destined direction, it's just pleasing

HIM TAKING DOWN ANTI EGG POSTERS. KING SHIT

Can't believe I got to hear "muffinhead" in lore voice.

Not even inside the room and HOLY SHIT they covered it all with the red bricks block IM AAAAH IT'S SO PRETTY. Like before the vines were all put at random but now they're neatly placed and it's actually aesthetically pleasing? I love it

DANCEFLOOR DANCEFLOOR DANCEFLOOR

The table. is . so. is so . it's so prebby,,, help like i'd live there man

Bad being overwhelmed by the egg's voice and lowkey scared. FINE IM FINE

No other choice. And the way he repeated it like a mantra? Kind of like to convince himself? AHHH

SKEPPY. SKEPP

small,, small egg staircase

haha fuckign pain. p a i n. just pain it sounds a lot like Skeppy before actually stayed with Bad cause it annoyed him how much he wanted to hang out like old times,,,,, my heart pangs

IM JUST WORRIED ABOUT YOU

I CARE ABOUT YOU *passes out*

bad scared the egg is skeppy's bff now /j (have to joke through the pain,,)

BADBOY i swear to god he knows his audience. he just does.

Bad doing whatever he can to even just hang out a few minutes with skeppy. Bro, the tears inside

"I'm comfortable right here." "Skeppy I know you are-" THE WAY BAD'S VOICE BROKE HERE HOLY SHIT LEMME CLIP IT.

He talks to chat. HE TALKS TO CHAT THIS MEANS WE ARE CANON THUS we are either little angels or demons around him or a mix or, we're particles that make up Rat ♥

"All of this is for him" okay stab me next time it'll hurt less

BADBOY STARTING TO BE CONFLICTED BECAUSE HE NEVER HAS A FUCKING BREAK

s- w- skeppy kept the egg alive? okay so ive been thinking about the fact that skeppy became completely red and like wow what if it kinda is that hes literally become a small part of Egg? like, i wonder if someone breaks it, if he feels pain

Skeppy so dry with his responses. stop i will cry

bad. bad why are you bringing up selfies to a lore stream bad-

"why are you still talking to me" "okay..." stop stop PLEASE STOP-

smol growls, he's getting frustrated

idk why but skeppy talking about the perimeters made me laugh it was just funny how far away he was and just started talking about it randomly

"i think it looked a little bit better before" thoughts being thunk

"what's it gonna take for you to stop talking to me?" literally i am deceased s t o p

STOP STEPPIN ON THE MAGMA BLOCKS SIR YOU'RE HURTING

Bad shouldn't be so happy about just having "one last walk around" with skeppy so he "stops bothering" him tHIS HURTS SO MUCH the egg has fucked them up so much

Skeppy doesn't hear it huh? Maybe it whispers different things to everyone

"I like how it feels" nooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO STOP HURTING TOURSELF

so no dance? *slams phone on the ground*

When skeppy says his line about never seeing anything close to a party there, idk what it is about it but his tone just hits, man he's so good preesh

HE CALLED HIM ANT. BAD PLS YOUR BEING BAD AT NAMES IS SHOWING

"Oh my goodness you're going back to the egg" HE'S SO SAD. HE'S SO SAD CAUSE HE COULDNT KEEP HIM WITH HIM A LITTLE BIT LONGER HES S

"you know what? i invite you" i wanna read this in a certain way. The egg was feeling like bad was so frustrated he started doubting the egg, so it was like alright let's use skeppy to get it closer to I can manipulate this bad boy better :)) motherfuck

are they about to kiss-

egg cockblocker

"okay don't come back" end me rn

ngl when sapnap joined I got real scared for a moment.

"it's not about power! it's nor about control! i'm you friend skeppy!" "I mean ... you can think that" FUCK U NO IM NOT DEALING WITH THIS RN

"We're friends, right?"

"In your head we can be best friends, we can be whatever you want" BDI ANYONE??????? also whatever- whatever he wants? :eyes: okay sorry no ill see myself out

"We're m- we are friends sk-" M- MARRIED WAS HE GONNA SAY MARRIED DID HE PULL A QUACKITY OH MY GOD I HATE THIS GUY OH MY GOD /pos but also like in a bawling my eyes out way

the egg is more than just a friend? skep u good there pal do u have smth to tell us

"You don't know what it's like." OH HERE HE GOES. HERE HE GOES HERE IT COMES OH NO.

The way Bad stutters i really thought he was gonna say something REALLY IMPACTFUL

"I have done so much for you, for our friendship and now you're trying to tell me we're not friends anymore?" LEAVE ME ALONE

I JUST CAUGHT THE BLOOPER HE SAID ON ME INSTEAD OF HANG OUT WITH ME IM CRYING OH MY GOD BAD HOW DID U FUCK THAT UP oh my god I imagine him mentally going like oh my gosh out of all the things that could be messed up THAT WAS SO FUNNY

ahaha my dads are fighting help

"You think you've done anything? You seriously think that?" *looks at my fic where bad feels worthless because the egg said so* ahah... I'm sorry?

"You left me for a long, long long time before you even checked up on me, okay?" he's not wrong,,,, he's not wrong why does this hurt sm,,,,, "and now all of a sudden you care about me?" OH MY GOD PLEASE I HATE THIS EGG

I see them... i see them approaching the lava blocks..

"the past doesn't matter" the egg wanting to erase their relationship so much,,,, i wanna cry because then if bad doesn't have skeppy he just has nothing right and then,,, then he can be another empty vessel for the fucking egg I hate this mI hate this so much

Also!!! little things I noticed!! Bad taking away part of the vine and also mining a red block? Without being affected at all? MHHHH

"I just wanted us to hang out like we used to" BAD'S VOICE CRACKING AGAIN STOP I WILL CJRYSD

"I did all of this for you and I didn't want the egg to take that away" you see how fucking tragic this is. Like Skeppy sacrificed himself so his friend could stop being infected. Bad sacrificed literally the whole server himself included to get him back. And then it comes down to this. The egg separating them a thousand fucking miles away. I hate this it's so sad

the selfish bit please no stop

THE LAVA BAD THE LAVA PLEASE IT'S TOO CLOSE

the fucking shaking with rage thing got me BROOOO I LOVE WHEN BAD DOES THE LITTLE THINGS IN GAME

"IT'S JUST A STUPID EGG" FUCKING FINALLY YOU TELL HIM BAD but then oh no oh no would you look at that huh. cant fucking have shit in dsmp. the way he immediately just screams for him right after

YOU CAN HEAR THE TEARS IN HIS VOICE and also mine hi I'm sobbing again

BDI FUCKING CANON LET'S GOOOOOOO WE CALLED ITTTT

(Dreamscape?)Skeppy being actually concerned with him haha this doesn't hurt at all!!!

*stares at black screen* I'm fine.

Thank you for listening to my ramble I am hurting so much bestie

[justsomefluff]

ATEEZ Reaction to You Falling Asleep in the Car

Summary: You are riding back from dinner with your boyfriend and can’t seem to keep your eyes open. Here’s how he reacts.

A/N: So, I did a little lookin’ over the responses to my last writings and the more informal style seemed to get the best results. That’s fun for me because I get to add more of myself into my writing I feel. So, if you don’t want all of my stuff to be like that, send in a request and let me know how you want me to do a particular fic. 

Hongjoong:

Ok so Joongie

This fool doesn’t even notice when your head drops onto his shoulder

Why?

Homie is dead asleep too

But the driver gently calls to him

Like we here kiddo hand over the money

And he’s like oh alright

Joong only notices that you’re asleep when he goes to pay and

Cant?? Move?? His arm??

So he gets smushy and he's like oh nu

Doesn’t want to wake you up

Wants to be cute and carry you but he has to pay too and AGH

Stress

So eventually he has to wake you up

He just kinda wiggles in his seat until the movement wakes you up

And then you wake up embarrassed because the driver is staring at both of you like what fresh hell

When Hongjoong finally pays you can’t get out of the car fast enough

He’s whining all the way to your apartment about how he didn’t want to wake you up and boohoo

You’re like okay, Wiggles

But both of you just crash onto the couch once you’re inside and all is forgiven

Seonghwa:

(LOOK AT THE MELANIN HERE WOOOOO)

ok this man

I feel like he’s a closest romantic

so when you’re awake he’s like ew no im not soft who said that??

but he lie

if you fall asleep on him in the car he notices right away

because he was staring at you already

Creep

and he’s all googoo eyed and everything and smiling super wide

when you arrive at your destination that’s when the romantic side slips out a lil bit

he’s like ok obviously we are gonna carry them

you’re his babie

so he slides his arms around you

Hug and roll technique from FRIENDS kinda deal

tries to make a super natural transition from car to his arms

king pulls it off

you stay asleep until you’re inside and he’s like

SUCCESS

and he’s all smug and proud of himself when he’s tucking you into bed

but lil does he know

you were awake the whole time

pretend to be asleep so your mom will carry you to bed kinda vibe

Momma Hwa or boyfriend Hwa? you can decide

So either way once he’s got you all bundled in the blankets

you’re soft and sleepy but smiling because

YOU CAUGHT HIM

he’s romantic after all

Yunho:

big squishy is so in love with you stop

he’s giggling at the way your face is smushed against the window

How can you sleep like that???

so he’s taking pictures of you, that you will hate if you ever find out he took them

and when you get wherever you’re going

he’s not confident that he won't hurt the both of you if he tries to carry you without you waking up

so he just pushes his nose into your cheeks and just gives Eskimo kissies until you wake up giggling

you have to push him off of you because he just can't stop

Yunnie really can’t get enough of you I mean seriously

seeing you sleepy always makes him soft and he shall remain this way for the rest of the time you’re together

and probably a little longer after you part

so for the rest of your time together he’s all goofy smiles and starry eyes

absolutely insistent on being attached to you 100% of the time

whether its cuddles if you’re at home

or just constant hugs

like homeboy won't let you WALK

either way you love it and you can’t lie

love him please

Yeosang:

ok I know this is a fluffy reaction but here comes some crack

Yeosang is gonna be straight up annoying

he’s poking your cheeks to wake you up

does not care how cute you are he just can’t resist bothering you

he cannot express adoration like the rest of us okay

so he’s gonna torture you instead

he’s taking videos of you drooling on him and making fun of you the whole time

will not let you live it down later on

he does keep any and all videos like that private though because you’re still his baby and he doesn't want you to be too embarrassed

but he definitely wants to make you flustered

loves to tease you

so you’re dosing off in the car and Sangie is like !!!!

perfect time to strike

so thats when he starts making fun of you and not letting you sleep

but if you’re pouty enough then he might start to feel bad

to make it up to you he will pull your head back down to his shoulder and stroke your hair the rest of the car ride

gives you little kisses on the top of your head

but when you fall asleep again he just opens his phone and laughs at all the dumb videos he took of you

San:

you’re Yunho

if you get sleepy he will immediately assume it’s time for cuddles

he does not care that you are in the back of a taxi

he does not care that the driver is low-key staring at the two of you, hoping nothing nasty starts up

I digress

Sannie notices that your eyelids are drooping and your head is bobbing up and down as you fight to stay awake

Cue soft San

he gently pulls you into a hug

highboy uncomfortable since you’re in a cab, and seated

but you’re too tired and he’s too soft

so neither of you care

San’s giving you feather-light kisses all along your cheek and temple

maybe even gives you a couple neck kisses to hear you whine at him

nuzzling x10000000000000

rubbing his nose in your hair, along your jaw, around your ears, down your neck

anywhere he can reach really

makes you tingly and happy and he knows it

so you get a lil giggly

kinda sleep-drunk and then he’s love-drunk

He’s a cheeseball but he knows how to make you feel loved so who cares

Mingi: 

he’s kinda oblivious to you falling asleep

but if you fall onto him he’s SO AWKWARD

kinda wheezy, embarrassed laughter

you just made his heart swell a lil too fast is all

give him a minute to recover, okay?

once he is finally back to the land of the living

he’s gonna smile so wide

something about seeing you sleep makes him so confident in your relationship

sleeping is so vulnerable and he loves that you trust him enough to share that vulnerability with him like this

and then he’s rubbing his cheek on the top of your head

and wrapping an arm around you to keep you close and warm

so attentive to you

rubbing your arm if he thinks you feel cold

making sure you’re in a comfortable position

doesn’t want you to wake up stiff or anything

will gently move you if your neck is bent at an awkward angle

if he's sleepy too, he’ll press as close to you as he can

kinda difficult to do with seatbelts on but he’s gonna make it work believe me

and then he just passes out

and we all know how he gets when he’s tired so you end up being the one to drag him inside later on

Wooyoung: 

Wooyoungie

baby

I feel like his energy is so high that if you want to sleep in the car with him, he’s gonna have to be sleepy too

so since both of you are sleepy

you’re smushed together in the backseat, heads resting on top of each other

and I feel like he wants kisses a lot when he’s sleepy

you’re both on the verge of sleep but he’s like waittt

“it’s nap time Wooyoungie”

“kiss first”

kisses you super soft

fluffy lips I can't

he kisses you so soft and deep

way too intimate a moment for the backseat of a stranger’s car

but whatever

kisses you like 25 times

super slow, and when you finally pull away he’s whining anyway bc

“wanted more”

but sleep is calling and you just can't

he ends up falling asleep first anyway

kinda pouty, but he’s happy overall because he got his kisses

even if it was fewer kisses than he wanted

Jongho:

Jongho highkey does not know what to do when you fall asleep on him

Will definitely decide to carry you inside and not wake you up

makes that decision before you even get close to your destination

but he’s a prince so he always thinks ahead

strokes your hair a lot and smiles super soft

hums a little to himself

gives you a couple kisses here and there because he just cant help himself

honestly really struggles with the fact that you both aren't cuddled up in bed or on the couch or something 

wants cuddles so bad

but he’s kinda reserved so he’s too shy to smush himself against you with the driver right there

shy about PDA in general, but sleep is even more special to him I think

eventually finds a compromise to keep himself happy until you're home

just laces his fingers with your and kisses your knuckles

it’s bread crumbs, I know, but he’s too shy to do more

itching to get where youre going

the quicker you get there, the quicker the day is over and he can cuddle the living daylights out of you until he’s satisfied

[skycollides]

Hi bubba!❤️ I really hope you’re well and happy! I’m falling in love with your fics😍😍 your writing is honestly remarkable!! I wanted to request for ez if that’s okay? With “You love her don’t you?” “is it that obvious?” It can be an angsty or fluffy ending whatever you think fits best!! Thank you so much🥰❤️❤️

Hey sweetheart! Thank you for all the love and support from day one! I love and appreciate you❤️❤️

I really hope you enjoy this one 🥰😘

No risk no fun

Ez x Reader

Authors note: I apologize in advance for grammar mistakes

English isn’t my native language.

Let me know if you want to be added to the taglist.

Warning: swearing, a little heartache, happy end

Words: 1.981

Ez’s Pov:

Another night at the clubhouse. Another party takes place and Ez can’t take his eyes off you. From the moment you walked in he was practically hypnotized by your beauty which was pretty obvious to Angel.

’’Hey little brother!’’ no reaction from Ez.

’’Ey earth to Ezekiel’’ he says smacking his head. Ez’s hand finds its way to the spot Angel hit him rubbing it.

’’Ouch. What was that for Angel?’’

’’Since you weren’t reacting I had to do something to get your attention. It’s hard to catch nowadays when my sweet Y/n is in the same room. Oh and by the way it’s really starting to become obvious. Bishop noticed too. You love her don’t you baby brother?’’

’’Is it that obvious?’’ 

’’Well only me and Bishop noticed so it isn’t that bad but dude if you love her you gotta tell her. You know I have this thing going on with her best friend and she told me that there is this guy, co-worker of hers who’s trying to get her attention he already asked her for a date so you better step up your game before its too late.’’ Angel tells him.

’’Why the hell would I tell her and make things awkward when she’s already seeing this guy? I lost my chance it’s better that way. She deserves better than an outlaw biker who murdered a cop. If you excuse me now I need to get new beer.’’ with that being said Ez leaves Angel there standing by himself.

Angels Pov:

‘‘Hey Y/bf/n baby. Come here.’’ he says standing at the door of the clubhouse. She leaves you and Letty and heads outside with Angel.

’’What is it?’’

’’Listen I need you to be honest with me. Do you promise me to tell the truth I need to ask you something important?’’

’’Sure. Just tell me what’s up?’’

’’Does Y/n have feelings for my brother?’’

’’Angel I can’t’’

’’What do you mean you can’t? You fucking promised me. Please I beg you.’’

’’Fine. Yes , yes she does. Why?’’

’’Yes I knew it! That’s fucking awesome. Listen baby I need your help. Ez loves her. I’m surprised you didn’t notice him staring at her all the time. We need to make this happen. My baby brother deserves to be happy after everything he went through with Emily. You simply need to convince Y/n not to go to the date with that guy and leave the rest to me okay?’’

’’Okay Angel. I hope this is working out or otherwise she’ll have my head for spilling her business.’’

’’As if I would let that happen’’ he says and kisses her head happy with the new information he now has.

A week later

Your Pov:

’’C’mon Y/n your co-worker is boring as fuck! He won’t make you happy.’’

’’And Ez will?’’

’’You’ll never now if you don’t tell him. Cancel the goddam date and come to the clubhouse with me. No risk no fun. Do you want to send the rest of your life overthinking what could have been between the two of you? Seriously he’s such a sweet guy you’d be perfect for each other!

’’Okay you win.’’ you give in defeated knowing that you will not won this fight and she is right. You can’t win without taking a risk.

You reach your destination about an hour later. Y/bf/n has texted Angel letting him know you will be there soon so when you get there he is already waiting for you outside.

’’Hey baby’’ he greets your bf before giving you a hug.

’’Hey Angel’’ you say.

’’Is everyone here already?’’ your bf asks him and he nods.

’’Yeah the party is started a couple of hours ago. Some guys from other charters are here so are Vickys girls. Well not everyone Ez went to his trailer shortly before you arrived. So let's go inside girls.’’ he finishes his monolog

’’Actually’’ you start 

’’I gotta talk to Ez first you can go in.’’ you say and your cheeks heat up being happy it’s dark so they won’t notice.

’’Go on. We’ll be inside’’ your bf says and they walk to the porch waiting there for what’s to come. Which you don’t notice since you’ve turned your back towards them. You open the door without knocking and go in there.

’’Listen Ez I gotta-’’ you stop speaking at the sight in front of you Ez only in his boxers laying in his bad with one of Vickys girls barely covered.

’’Y/n I-’’ he starts but you interrupt him right away.

’’I’m so sorry I- I should have knocked. I’m sorry’’ you say with a shaky voice literally running out of the trailer slamming the door behind you, tears leaving your eyes.

The door opens again and Ez come out now at least waking jeans.

’’Y/n wait! He says but you’re already in your car driving off.

Ez pov:

He turns around and sees Angel and his girls standing there looking at him. 

’’Are we going to finish what we started or what?’’ he hears a voice behind him.

’’Leave!’’ he tells her and she does as she’s told.

’’Are you fucking serious?’’ he hears Angel yell while he walking towards him.

’’What?’’

’’What? That’s all that comes to your mind genius? Crazy that a guy who’s as dumb as you got into a university like Stanford. You’re a fucking idiot that’s what you are. I told my girl to talk Y/n out of that fucking date with that guy so you have a shot. She convinced her to tell you about her feelings and you’ve got nothing better to do than getting your dick wet? I seriously thought you love Y/n but I guess I was wrong. My fault that beautiful and smart girl git her heart broken.’’

’’I do love her man! I had no idea’’ he says realizing he probably made the biggest mistake of his life.

’’Then do something about it brother! FIGHT FOR HER as I fucking told you before!’’

’’Ez that’s the key to her apartment. Please don’t fuck this up I want to see my best friend happy’’

’’Thanks guys’’ with that we walks to his bike and drives off.

Your Pov:

As soon as you get home you drop your heals in the hallway going straight into your bedroom jumping into bed and crying into your pillow. You can’t remember the last time you were hurt like this. You really thought you had a shot with him but it looks like your were wrong. And so was your best friend. With your thoughts running wild and all the crying you don’t notice someone coming into to the room. You only notice when the mattress moves.

’’I told you y/bf/n I fucking told you look where it got me!’’ you say with your voice cracking. You turn around and can’t believe your eyes. It’s not here sitting on your bed. It’s Ez with the most apologetic look on his face.

’’Get the fuck out of here. NOW!’’

’’I wont leave until you listened to me Y/n. Look I’m sorry you had to see this. God I don’t even know where to start. I better start with the fact that I’m completely in love with you. Head over heals. I know it doesn’t really look like it right now but listen. Last week Angel caught me staring at you again. And he asked if I was in love with you. He told me about your date with your co-worker and I knew I will never save a chance with you. I mean who am I? A outlaw biker who got out of jail couple months ago

because he murdered a cop. I mean come on Y/n. That guy has a stable job and is not in conflict with the law. I though you were better off with someone like him. I knew I lost so I tried to get over you with one of Vicky girls. I swear nothing happened. I know it looks bad but I couldn’t. You were on my mind the whole time sweetheart. I stopped her right before you walked in. I swear. I know that probably wasn’t the brightest idea to be honest. 

What I’m trying to say Y/n. I love you. I love you so fucking much baby. You had me hypnotized the moment I laid my eyes on you for the first time. I was blown away by your smile and your beauty. And girl don’t get me started on those beautiful eyes. But that’ not the reason I fell in love with you. That’s a lie it is a part but the main reason is your character. You are the sweetest girl with the biggest heart I’ve ever met. You light up my world babygirl. Please let me make it up to you. Give me a chance to prove that to you.’’ he ends his little speech staring down at the mattress nit daring to look you in the eyes.

’’Ez?’’ you say softly. No reaction.

’’Ez, sweetie look at me’’ and he looks up to you.

’’First of all you are literally the biggest idiot I’ve met. Seeing you with her fucking hurt me. I don’t think I’ve ever felt hurt like this before. I’m glad you didn’t sleep with her by the way. Listen Ez I love you. I don’t care that you went to jail. I love you for who YOU are. You are so much more than an outlaw biker Ezekiel. You are such a wonderful human being. I chose to become your friend for a reason. I love being around you. I love that I can have deep conversations with you. I love that you listen to me not matter what time it is. I love your kind heart, your humor and your smile. I swear you got me with that smile. I’m glad you’re here right now. Thanks for stopping by and telling m the truth. I love you too Ezekiel Reyes.’’ you say with a smile and before you can say anything else he grabs you by your neck pulling your face to bis before pressing his lips onto yours. Your hand fins its way to his cheek caressing it with your thumb while EzS tongs asks for entrance keeping the kiss as soon as you allow him. You’re the first one to release his lips to get some air. He leans his forehead against yours smiling at you.

’’Wow’’ you say.

’’Wow indeed. I cant believe I missed out on those soft lips for so long. Be my girl mi amor?’’

’’I thought you’ll never ask’’ you say laughing.

’’Yes I’ll be yours babe.’’ you say and kiss him again.

’’You’re going to stay here right?’’ you ask him hoping the answer will be yes.

’’Yes just let me call Angel real quick then I’ll join you in bed sweetheart.’’ with that being said he gets up from the bed gets undressed and calls Angel while you head to the bathroom getting ready for bed. When you leave the bathroom he’s laying in your bed still on the phone with Angel.

’’Ill see you tomorrow Angel. Bye!’’ Ez ends the call and puts his phone on the nightstand while you get into bed. 

’’Everything okay?’’

’’More than okay baby. Y/bf/n won’t kill me I guess that’s a good sign if you ask me’’ he says and you laugh.

’’Yes she can get quite protective to be honest.’’ you say cuddling into his chest. He wraps his arms around you pulling you closer before kissing your head.

’’I love you Y/n’’

’’I love you too Ezekiel. Sleep well my love’’

’’You too mi amor’’

Taglist:

@everyhowlmarksthedead

@mayans-sauce

@justatiredfool

@lovebennycolon

@queenbeered

@nadinesabre

@ocetevasgirl

@spookys-girl

@angelreyesgirl

[rebelhan]

hello i would like to humbly request something with the making out on a cowch meme, pref mando please and thanks <333333

picture of cowch at the bottom for your reference... you have been warned

pairing: Din Djarin x Reader

word count: 1.3k+

warnings: crack fic, making out, fluff, furniture shopping, meme at the bottom of the post

a/n: i literally cant believe i wrote this... anyways yes its a crack fic and yes i wrote it seriously.. i really struggled to keep this short............. i advise that you read the fic before looking at the pic so you might enjoy actually enjoy it.

ao3 link

requests open! masterlist

It’s not the strangest piece of furniture either of you have seen, but it is definitely in the top ten. You shouldn’t have been so surprised, after all, Mos Eisley is known for its strange wares. It seems to be some sort of animal, one neither of you have laid eyes on before, though that’s not out of the ordinary. No amount of time is enough to visit every corner of the galaxy.

And yet no matter how strange the item in question is, both of you seem to have become enamored with it. Din has already gone to find the owner of the piece and ask for the price while you’re still studying the black and white monstrosity. The gears are already clicking in your head, mentally mapping the cargo hold of the Razor Crest around the piece. It should fit.

You see Din walk back to you out of the corner of your eye. “It should fit,” you tell him.

He nods in acknowledgement. You are of one mind on this decision it seems.

“How much is it?” you ask.

His shoulders droop. He lets out a long stream of air. It sounds metallic passing through the filters on his helmet but you know what it means.

“Fifteen hundred credits.”

You suddenly feel lightheaded and it’s not from the blistering heat of Tatooine.

You sit down on the sofa in question, training your gaze on the beskar clad man. The sun reflecting off his armor makes him nearly impossible to look at. The couch has been slowly roasting under the sun since the market opened and the heat it has absorbed seeps into your skin even through your clothes.

“Pragmatically speaking,” you say, “there is no need for us to buy this. It would fit in the cargo hold but it would be tight. It doesn’t even look nice.” You sound like you’re trying to convince yourself more than anything else.

Din sits beside you, spreading his legs wide and slinging one arm behind you. The tassets covering his thighs are uncharacteristically warm against your legs, you aren’t used to the feeling given the ever cool temperature of the Razor Crest.

“And fifteen hundred credits is a good chunk of our savings. Or at least a month or two of work,” he says. His voice is warm and low, so smooth that no filter in his armor can strip him of his ability to send a shiver down your spine.

Somewhere in the back of your mind, you acknowledge the cost, but your consciousness is dedicated to staring at his legs. He takes up space, claims it for himself. He looks relaxed, an uncommon occurrence that has your mouth watering. Heat surrounds you on all sides, between the hulking man of metal, the ghastly piece of furniture you sit on, and the scorching desert air. It takes one glance towards the dark visor of his helmet for him to know exactly where your mind is. He’d be lying if his mind hadn’t also been there since the moment he saw the couch.

“So we shouldn’t buy it,” you say. Your voice comes out breathless. Even as you say it you’re regretting the words. It wasn’t so much about the couch itself, but what activities could potentially occur on said couch. Din’s meager cot was far too uncomfortable for the appetite the two of you shared. And though it was ugly, Maker was it ugly, something pulled you both towards it and you could not pull away.

“No we shouldn’t,” he says. You pick up on the slight strain to his voice and feel a little triumphant in the fact that you aren’t the only one picturing the possibilities.

You place a hand on his helmet and guide his head towards you. He lets you do as you please, leaning where you direct him, until you press your forehead against his. Din freezes. You focus your eyes on the visor, and though you can’t see his face, you know he’s staring right back. His helmet doesn’t pick up on it, but his breaths come out shallow and ragged.

It’s likely no one around you knows enough about Mandalorian customs to understand exactly what is happening. It feels private. But Din rarely even holds your hand outside the Razor Crest and you know this is all too much for him. You know that he’s heating up like a furnace inside his armor.

He breaks in ten seconds.

The couch is yours in thirty more.

It’s not as much of a hassle to get the sofa to the Razor Crest as you thought it would be. It helps that both of you are of a one track mind and Din brought his jetpack with him to Mos Eisley’s market.

It’s a little more difficult to drag the thing up the Razor Crest’s ramp. By the time it’s situated in the cargo hold, the both of you are more than a little out of breath.

He moves quickly. His hands shift over his vambrace and the ship is sealed. You dart to his cot and grab the blindfold. It’s secure over your eyes just as Din flicks off the lights in the cargo hold. You hold your breath when you hear the telltale whoosh of air that releases when his helmet is undone, until the clang of the metal hitting a surface resounds through the cabin.

Then it’s the slap of his leather gloves falling against a table. And then you feel his hands on yours, tugging you gently. There’s an echoing thunk and you know he is seated on the couch. Then your shins hit his.

He grabs at the back of your thighs, urging you forward until you lift one leg after the other onto the sofa, your thighs caging his. His hands find your waist, pushing down, settling you in his lap. The metal of his tassets is hard, insistent, even through your clothes.

You are surrounded by his armor beneath your hands, surging up to find the warmth of his skin, his scent, dark spice and earthy. He rucks up your shirt, splaying his fingers across your ribs while your palm finally, finally, finds his chin. His stubble is prickly on your fingertips, but it’s the last thing on your mind when you pull his lips to meet yours.

His lips are soft. You are surprised by this every time you kiss him. How a man made up entirely of hard lines and a literal steel gaze could be so soft is entirely a mystery to you. But then you feel his grip tightening, undoubtedly pressing bruises into your skin, and his armor digging into your thighs as you pull yourself impossibly closer to him.

He drags his tongue against you and you oblige, granting him entrance. He licks into your mouth. He is somehow wet heat and cold metal, all at once, overwhelming your senses entirely. His hand crawls up your spine, pushing you towards him. You jolt into his chest when the cool steel of his vambrace meets your skin.

Then he’s kissing at your jaw, marking a trail down your neck in little bites. One of your hands slides into his hair instinctively, finding purchase in his thick hair, urging him on, and the other blindly grasps at the back of the couch. In the dark of the Razor Crest, on the other side of your blindfold, your knuckles turn white as Din sucks a harsh mark at the juncture of your neck and shoulder.

“Din.”

His name falls from your lips in a whisper, but it’s loud to your sensitive ears, amplified by the loss of your sight.

He stops his assault on your neck to chuckle into your collarbone. You feel the sound vibrate in your bones. 

“I’d say the couch has already been well worth the price, wouldn’t you?” he murmurs into your skin.

He follows his question by biting at your pulse point and you can do little else but nod at him, your breath leaving you in little ragged bursts.

------

thank you for reading! here’s the cowch meme if you made it this far

[planetjisungie]

détester- l.dh

characters; slytherin! haechan x gryffindor! reader ft. gryffindor! mark (its just a given at this point) and slytherin! jisung

summary; enemies to lovers, you and donghyuck had always just hated eachother. you dont know when it started, or why it started but it was starting to get annoying.

an; i WILL finish my hogwarts series tonight we only have chenle left but now we have more fluff than actual crack because simon says is playing

congratulations you have reached gryffindor level you lucky prick

only the finest gryffindor

you are the embodiment of courage, literally if there was a ditch and someone fell down while everyone was too scared to help them, youd dive in before they could even say ‘dumbledore’

and you just so happen to be the younger sister of mark lee

the infamous mark lee,, that is

lucky prick part 2

but one thing made you seem not so lucky

your sworn enemy, lee donghyuck

or haechan as he liked to be called because apparently all evil villains needed a fake name

thats what you said anyway, he just liked the name haechan for its meaning

but he was also the emodiment of a slytherin, ambitious, cunning, resourceful and he was a pretty damn good leader

hence him being the captain of the quidditch team (no we are not going down the jisung route)

you didnt actually know when you started hating him, in your first year he had just decided to tie your poor, poor cat like a pig for roasting (he was in his second year already)

mr snuggles was traumatized

after that day it was small things to annoy you

like when he put hair dye in your conditioner bottle, resulting in your hair turning out a seafoam green colour

which you actually didnt mind so the joke was really on him, you pulled that shit off

or when he put spiders in your school shoes

that was unpleasant

and he also put a cockroach in your pocket, scaring your poor best friend who was terrified of the creatures

jisung was shaking, he hates cockroaches

to this day you still didnt know why he was a slytherin, but you guessed it was because he was a pureblood, very ambitious and resourceful but not so scary

but today was no exception

you walked towards the gryffindor table, robe billowing behind you as if you were walking in a movie

you were a lee sibling, you were both good at literally everything and deserved all the praise on earth

you fucking go girl, i stan

jisung sat at your table, the gryffindors appeared not to mind, especially as he was actually super nice

"y/n haechan told me to give you this"

ah there it was

the small hufflepuff girl handed you the letter before scurrying off back to her table

"y/n im scared"

jisung was already frightened of what that letter would hold

and you were a good friend, who knew no good would come from that letter

so you shoved it in your pocket, letting it crumple up before turning back to your breakfast

rip donghyuck

that was a fat L for our boy

he just wanted your attention

at first at least, he just wanted to be noticed by you so he pulled the cat stunt, making sure he didn’t actually harm the creature because he is still a decent human being and the grey furry animal did nothing to him

but now he had taken things too far

and he realised that after the stunt he pulled which resulted in you

yes, you, the brave, courageous gryffindor, crying

yeah he fucked up

he casted an illusion spell that infiltrated your sleep, creating nightmares with your deepest fears

and he regretted that

prank gone wrong *nearly killed her* (not clickbait)

you were still pissed at him for that

but that letter in your pocket was no ordinary letter

it was a confession letter, because he; yes him, the infamous slytherin, was too scared to talk to you about it in person

yet you literally just crushed his heart

which he kinda deserved to be fair

but jisung sent you a grateful smile and you went back to your conversation of which cereal brand was better

the answer is obviously lucky charms or frosted shreddies pengers mate

so our baby slytherin needed to find another way to get his feelings across because he was failing

and brother mark was: not happy

mark was a friend of haechan but despite his complaints every goddamn time that he needed to stop his stupid jokes that weren’t actually jokes, he didnt listen

maybe he shouldve listened

mark knows best

apart from jenos fic, mark was a real bitch but this is mark 2.0

mark really doesnt know best

anyways moving on

its time for innovative hyuck™️

so its back to the drawing room, sitting next to yuta (his head boy) to discuss the next plan of action

cutie yuta felt that haechan opening up to him about his feelings was the biggest achievement during his time at hogwarts

so right, the next plan

it was to leave flowers on your bed and then when you turned around to see who put them there (hypothetically) he would be there and he could make his outstanding apology

but of course, this isnt some fanfiction where everything goes right

who do you take me for?

so later that day he gathered his flowers, tying them in a cute dark green ribbon

staying with the slytherin theme

and he put them on your bed

they were some seriously nice flowers

you noticed them as soon as you walked in and your heart swelled

unfortunately that wasnt the only thing that swelled

you were allergic to pollen, and your eyes had puffed up slightly, itching a little and you had some sniffles

that was another L for hyuck

and he ran, he fucking booked it out of his little hiding spot back to his common room aka the dungeon

"YUTA I FAILED"

"how the fuck do you fail giving someone flowers hyuck?"

"shes fucking allergic"

so you never found out who gave you flowers

but

but you did keep them, despite your obvious physical irritation to them

they were pretty :(((

so you pressed them into a random notebook you found, because seriously you couldnt just chuck them out

unfortunately for hyuck, he was not so slick to mark who narrowed his eyes on the boy

he knew something was up

what kind of torture device was flowers ?? this was too soft

and so he found out that the same boy who had been making your life a little

how should i say

s p i c y

had a fat crush on you and was just a pouty baby who wanted your love and attention

cute

mark didnt know whether to support this?? like ?? he knew that underneath your front of disliking the long legged boy, you had some feelings, maybe small but they were there

you wouldve called it fondness

because

i promise youre not a sadist or masochist

but you would see him in class

he was very focused and had a beautiful smile

and laugh

he may come across a little... stand offish and arrogant at first but hes actually a kind soul

from how he made a mess in the grand hall but when he thought everyone was gone, he stayed behind to help clean it, having fun conversations with the staff (elves? who tf cleans the great hall??)

that goddamn melodious laughter constantly ringing in your head

shawtys like a melody in my head

but moving on

you noticed the pranks he pull decreased

and that was because he was spending time with yuta and mark, planning the perfect, foolproof (unfortunately not jeno this time) way to confess

and he sent you small smiles ?? what ??

this is so unlike the hyuck you knew

like he did a 180

i did a full 180 baby crazy

i said this was gonna be less crackish but when regular comes on and you hear jaehyuns queso line you cant not feel qUirKy

(bbq- bb—s mY DIAMONDS I DONT NEED NO LIGHT TO SHINE- jungwoo)

okay so the next plan

you loved quidditch too, mainly because your brother was the captain for the gryffindor team

so the plan was for you to attend the slytherin v gryffindor match and

mark somewhat willingly agreed to have a friendly match so that hyuck could show off his skills

this was an awful plan

because it was raining the day of the match

so you and jisung huddled together for warmth, shivering as you watched the match

and hyuck couldnt feel worse, he felt like you were now going to be sick because of him

damn, you really couldnt catch a break

the groan of pure frustration yuta let out was amusing at least

he was just as invested in this as haechan at this point

like he was germinating a seed??? he was fathering this relationship

so with another L, haechan felt super super bad

and this baby cooked for you

he got his best friend jaemin to teach him how to make chicken soup

because you were actually not a herbivore

(thats the category i put vegans and vegetarians in)

omnivore tings

so he carried his little pot of soup, his fingers kind of burning as it was piping hot

he legit walked right past a suffering jisung in the slytherin dorm, the pot of soup still in hand not even sparing a thought about taking pity on the poor kid and giving him some

so he walked to your dorm, being let in by mark who was being big bro™️ and looking after your sick ass

you looked dead

pale skin, eyes closed, lips tinted blue, your body was shivering but you felt fucking boiling

peak peak times

but haechan still thought you looked gorgeous

mark vacated the dorms, leaving to his lessons so hyuck could look after you

this wasnt a plan ?? but hyuck rolled with it

setting his lil pot down he sat in a seat next to you, staring at your asleep awake form with closed eyes

his eyes held so much love and adoration for you, you really are lucky

he took off his robe, just sitting there in his shirt, trousers and green tie and watching you sleep

you were actually awake, just vibing and breathing to stay alive

and he had a lot on his chest

"i know ive been a massive prick to you and im really sorry. i know you’re asleep right now but im too much of a coward to say this to your face. i really only just wanted your attention because i seem to have feelings for you and i am sincerely sorry for going about it the wrong way"

your ears were {}

wide open

boy were you listening and taking this all in

oh shit

realizashun xx

so you fluttered your eyes open gently, watching his face morph into an expression of pure terror from his previous one of literal love

*whipping noise*

"youre awake!" he squeaked out, eyes darting around the room to look at anything but you

which you couldnt help but smile at

shifting to the side in your bed slightly, you lifted the covers, lazily patting the now open space

"c’mere"

your voice was kind of croaky and hoarse

that made hyuck feel guilty

baby it wasn’t your fault

but he complied, kicking off his leather school shoes and sliding besides you, staying as far away from you as possible

not to offend you, his heart was just going a million miles a second and there was no way you wouldn’t be able to hear it

this boy was like blushy sausage face part 2

arrogant hyuck has left the chat

you pouted seeing him shuffle away from you, shuffling to move yourself closer instead

power move, he either had to cuddle with you or fall off the bed

"can we just forget what i said earlier?"

that made you frown

the fuck?

hell no

"hyuck wait-"

"no dont bring it up its embarrassing"

whiny baby is back

"hyuck i-"

"nope nope nope nope"

"LET ME SPEAK FOR FUCKS SAKE"

he had no choice but to listen

your voice sounded strained already and he didnt want to make you feel worse

"i have feelings for you too you big baby"

double take

you what now?

haechans mouth just kinda froze open

so you shut his jaw gently

cant let him get jaw ache

"wait what?"

his soul has returned

he felt elated, completely happy, dare i say like he was high on a drug and said drug was not THC it was your TLC (LMAO GET IT IM PROUD OF THAT)

and so thats how mark returned to your dorm room to see you and hyuck cuddled in your bed, your head laying on his chest as his chin rested on your head, nuzzling into your hair (which was still half seafoam green might i add)

hyuck wasnt awake to celebrate, so yumark had their own small celebration, counting this as their success

you only found out he had put the flowers on your bed about two months after you started dating

a month after that you read the letter he gave you