#they promise
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
inbabylontheywept · 4 months ago
Text
so once me and my wife were watching a documentary where a snake ate like a million eggs. that snake just went to fucking town on eggs. and the snake made the eggs look so good that i kept thinking about it, and thinking about it, and thinking about it, and eventually it was 11pm and i ran out of willpower and decided to eat one (1) singular raw egg just to prove to myself that the snake was surely a liar.
the snake was not a liar. texture is like, super important to me and raw eggs are very Texture so i had another one, and then another one, and then another one, and eventually i ran out of eggs.
i had like, fifteen raw eggs.
i didnt really know how to explain this momentary madness to my wife, so my Plan was to put all the eggshells into a grocey bag, and then throw that grocery bag in the dumpster, and if she never noticed that would be Excellent and if she noticed immediately i could lie and say that the eggs went bad.
except i cant lie very good, and of course with murphys law being such, i got salmonella.
so i threw up a lot and my wife asked me what poisoned me so and i tried very hard to dodge the question but i was oozing shame like oil from a room temperature cheese and eventaully i gave in and told her everything and to her enormous credit she was more flabbergasted than actually upset. she did make me promise to not eat any more raw eggs, which i have stuck to, and she gives me weird looks during nature documentaries now as if desire was the only thing keeping me from eating thousands of pounds of krill anyway i made a joke earlier about being able to eat my age in eggs and my sister in law in law made a drawing to comemorate the moment and also because it was my birthday. she's excellent. thank you 10000000% @cintailed. you should all visit her page and admire her work.
Tumblr media
63K notes · View notes
aetherjay · 15 days ago
Text
Tumblr media
the real reason he did it
36K notes · View notes
poorly-drawn-mdzs · 8 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
Knowledge Revenge.
72K notes · View notes
arcanegifs · 5 days ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
ARCANE LEAGUE OF LESBIANS: 2x08 - “Killing is a Cycle”
26K notes · View notes
fly-chicken · 21 days ago
Text
A Pragmatic and surprisingly comforting perspective about the Trump 2nd Presidency from the ACLU
***Apologies if this is how you found out the 2024 election results***
Blacked out part is my name.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
I’m not going to let this make me give up. It’s disheartening, and today I will wallow, probably tomorrow too
AND
I will continue to do my part in my community to spread the activism and promote change for the world I want to live in. I want to change the world AND help with the dishes.
And I won’t let an orange pit stain be what stops me from trying to be better.
A link to donate to the ACLU if able and inclined. I know I am
26K notes · View notes
cafffine · 11 months ago
Text
my prof just explained on the syllabus that he’s included more points in the class than we needed to pass, so we could skip up like?? 20 small assignments/quizzes/participation!! and still get a very high grade!!
the idea was that we could focus on assignments that played to our strengths - only do the participation stuff if we like to talk out loud - only do the quizzes/readings if we want to do the class remotely - only do online discussions if we like to talk and share opinions but struggle with anxiety in class ect.
and that’s cool enough but then he pulled up DnD character sheets with drawings he’d done of these hypothetical student player classes and how our various accessibility needs could be gamified to ‘max out’ different aspects of the class to get high grades and like!!!!!
hell yeah!!!! let’s treat accessibility in higher education not just as a necessity but as the fun, engaging, and creative aspect of learning that it is!!! I love this!!
EDIT: For proper credit or further questions about his system please find my professor on twitter @/kurtishanlon
78K notes · View notes
voice-of-illogical-sense · 1 year ago
Text
147K notes · View notes
a-sweeter-solarsystem · 24 days ago
Text
take my hand for a moment
your objective from this point on is to survive
the election results are going to take a few days. The world is going to be very tense. I want you to take all the things you like to do to distract yourself and splurge on them. I want you to go eat your favroite foods and spend time with friends. I want you to do what you gotta do to make sure you can make it through the week.
There are people out there who want you to survive. There are people out there who are just as scared as you are.
We'll get through this. We will find a way
19K notes · View notes
taffywabbit · 1 year ago
Text
they should invent a new type of "staying in bed for 2-3 hours after you wake up repeatedly opening and closing apps on your phone" where it makes you feel awesome and energized and emotionally fulfilled
76K notes · View notes
junkworldusa · 5 months ago
Note
you make me want to draw again
here you go! this is also for my future self.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
26K notes · View notes
obsob · 10 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
i am a being capable of immeasurable love and whimsy
43K notes · View notes
hotcinnamonsunset · 4 months ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
The Tiger (from the poem by Nael, age 6)🐅
20K notes · View notes
whiterabbitloveposting · 6 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
For those wondering - Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1 #338 (Hobgoblin sprays Spider-man with poison) and #339 (Doc Ock reveals the poison only becomes lethal when combined with cocaine).
Tumblr media Tumblr media
23K notes · View notes
chenniedol · 3 months ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
ford finds out what stan did while using his name:
this is my first fancomic i hope yall like it!! thank you for the support on my previous posts <3
16K notes · View notes
vanmarkus · 6 months ago
Text
"how can you multiship?" well you see honey, when two people love each other very much and neither of them is real...
34K notes · View notes