#they not bringing back the trickster any time soon

[thetimelordbatgirl]

Rip Trickster returning theories, guys, because that is definitely not the Trickster:

[hedgehog-moss]

Look at the delicious sushi for llamas I made today:

It's courgette stuffed with deworming paste and thanks to Poldine my plan went swimmingly. Pampelune is sometimes distrustful on deworming day, but when they saw Poldine get a treat then try to steal the other treats which were obviously meant for them, the other animals hurried to claim their own medicinal courgette as well.

Except Pampe. (How many times have I written these words.) She looked at her sushi, looked at me, sniffed every side of the courgette, decided it smelled like deceit, and walked away.

I felt daft for not going the muesli route straight away. Like all great tricksters Pampérigouste is suspicious by nature but she can't resist muesli. So I un-stuffed the courgette and used the sticky deworming paste to fashion a little muesli ball.

It was gooey and not very appetising but it's muesli, right? I camouflaged the muesli ball in a dish of innocent muesli and offered it to Pampe, but unfortunately she was now very aware that I was up to something. Instead of mindlessly vacuuming the contents of the muesli dish as she usually does, she examined the strange slimy little ball, pushed it away with her nose with obvious contempt, then ate the normal muesli. I tried (with increasing insistence and frustration) to convince her to eat the damn muesli ball, but no.

New idea: I went to the kitchen to get some pumpkin rinds, and squished the muesli ball between two small pieces of pumpkin skin like a Choco BN (if you're from the US, picture an orange worm-killing Oreo). Pampe likes pumpkin skin! I tried to explain to her that she would be punishing only herself if she refused the (admittedly deceitful) offering out of principle.

Somehow she managed to eat the outside 'biscuits' and spit out the stuffing.

At this point I had to shame her. (I told her to look ashamed for this photo; not sure she understood the assignment)

I had exhausted my creativity and had nothing left but the mean method. I got Pampe in llama jail, aka the school room where I spent many hours trying to teach her to wear a halter and be a good docile llama when she was little, while she spent many hours trying to escape by any conceivable means—high jumps, bribery, tunnels, you name it.

(In the background behind Poldine you can see the bag of hay that I used to get the llamas to follow me into the corral. Pampe naively thought I had given up on trying to make her eat gross slimy things and was about to give her a normal meal)

She tried a strange kind of escape this time around, which honestly might have worked if she were a swift salmon returning to her natal river to spawn, slicing against the current in a series of graceful, forward-arching curves. But she's a llama. It's like she forgot she wasn't all neck and also had a body that needed to clear this obstacle.

I sang her a little song to soothe her, and scritched her face, and managed to get a llama kiss which is more affection than I've ever received from a currently-jailed Pampe—her daughter really is a good influence on her!

So of course I took advantage of this moment of calm and trust to stick my hidden secret syringe in the corner of her mouth and push 2cm of deworming paste onto her tongue.

She was VEXED and WROTH.

We were talking about learning poetry by heart the other day; well, if Pampérigouste did that, "I am rowing (a hex poem)" is the poem she would have invoked in that moment.

After I left, all the other animals hurried into the corral to eat the hay I had used to get Pampe in, while Pampe turned her back on the meal and walked away a strategic distance, far enough to show me that she felt betrayed and would never eat any food I bring her ever again, not so far that she couldn't go back in and fight the donkey for what was left of the hay as soon as I stopped looking.

[gilverrwrites]

Im back on my supernatural shit, can you please do TFW + Gabe and anyone else you wanna do reacting to finding out the reader had a dirty dream about them?

Author note: Me too Boo, me too. I added lucifer, just cause I wanted too. Hope you enjoy! I also switched things up with gifs for each instead of one image for everyone. Lemme know which one you guys prefer.

Rating: M/18+

Please remember: that it is enough to exist as you are.

Dean

You’ve never seen a bigger shit-eating grin in all your life; he looks like he hit the jackpot.

No matter how much or how little you tell him, he won’t stop making jokes or bragging how bad you want it.

Dean I need you t- “Yeah you do.” Stop it! “Bet you weren’t saying that in your dreams last night.” *Gesturing at something even remotely suggestive* “Hey hey hey, did we do that?”

He promises to stop if you give him the full run down.

And when you do, he’s like Christmas came early.

All wide eyes and dopy smiles, occasional blushing.

He’s got a million and one questions throughout, but the final and most is obviously: “You wanna go at the real thing?”

Sam

Immediate shuts down for like 5 minutes. His brain has to comprehend and then reboot.

He won’t joke or make fun of you, at least not in front of other people.

But as soon as you’re alone, he’s got questions, lots of detail-oriented questions.

He’s not outright asking what your dream was, just teasing you with meticulously detailed fantasies of his own posed as questions.

“Did I make you beg for it? Did you make me beg?” “Were you completely naked, stretched out underneath me? Were my hands around your throat?” “What did I say? Did I tell you I would ruin you? That you deserved it? Did you want me to?”

Castiel

Angels don’t dream. Primarily because they don’t sleep.

So, he’s not really sure what to make of this confession at first.

Queue the signature furrowed brow and head tilt.

“Why?” I don’t know, I didn’t do it on purpose! “That’s true. I suppose this is your mind’s subconscious way of informing you that you are sexually attracted to me."

Boy, he doesn’t beat around bushes.

He would need time to stew on it from there.

It could be hours, days, maybe weeks before he brings it up again.

“I am curious about your dream.” What dr- oh right. “I am flattered. Should you be willing, I would like to discuss this more. For example, which of us…”  

Gabriel

You can sense the raised brows and the satisfied smirk before he even does it.

“Reeeeeally?”

Gabe’s reaction is very similar to Deans, just like a Trickster in a candy store.

Only he’ll wait to get you alone before he starts bombarding you.

If you won’t tell him outright, he’ll keep guessing.

And every new guess is accompanied by a costume and/or scenery change.

“Maybe we filmed the newest instalment of casa erotica?” “No? Maybe you paid Dr Sexy a visit?” “Mile high club?” “No? Kinkier? You into a little BDSM?”

I’ll let you fill in the visual blanks. 😉

Lucifer

His reaction is a lot more subdued. 

That doesn’t make it any less dubious. You can feel the smugness radiating off of him.

He’ll ask earnestly enough to start out.

“Do you want to tell me about it?”

When you refuse, he doesn’t push. Doesn’t joke, or tease.

But the smile he keeps giving you.

The way he watches you, totally engrossed but poised, is enough to drive you crazy.

When he finally asks again, later on, in that low, relaxed tone:

“Are you sure you don’t want to tell me all about your dirty little fantasies?”

Temptation really is his game.

[sepicriting]

yandere selection poll

―for your most favorite yandere concepts to come.

notes: as a little thank-you for bringing the yandere twins intro to 200 notes and getting me to 30 followers, you get to vote on which yandere concept i should work on next from a list of ideas i've got brewing! the winner of this poll will guarantee an early release, but please do note that just because other concepts didn't win does not mean that they're no longer going to be published! some of these concepts aren't fully fleshed out either, and are subject to change whenever i find it necessary.

A Yandere Princess, whose every action and word is judged by all. She then meets you, darling reader, who looks past her status as a princess and doesn't bat an eye for any mistake she commits. She, who holds the weight of her people on her shoulders, is willing to drop and set aside everything for you.

A Yandere Milf who moves in next door with her children as a recently-widowed, single mother. To cope with her loss, she runs a small garden out front, causing her to frequently have brief interactions with you whenever you leave your home. Over time she takes a liking to you, finding little similarities that connect you to her husband, and she invites you for family dinners. And after numerous times spent with you, she concludes in her mind that you are not her husband, but definitely should be her lover.

A Yandere Nurse who feels a little perverted for the feelings he's beginning to harbor towards the hospital's most recent patient ― you. He constantly can't quite look you in the eye out of guilt for his unprofessional attitude and treatment. You notice that he's especially skittish whenever he tends to you, but you quickly come to realize that he's the only nurse who consistently comes when you call for someone. He hopes that by intentionally causing your sickness to worsen, you'd come to rely on him for a long time.

A Yandere Tattoo Artist who is quite promiscuous with everyone, showing off much of his skin until you decide to come to his shop. He can't trust himself to hold back from hitting on you, especially when you go under the pain of his needle. He keeps his excitement down whenever he sees your first session, and makes sure you somehow always bump into him when you go out. After all, he's wondering if you'll drop by his shop anytime soon.

Yandere Zombie Boyfriend whose dying wish was to spend forever with you and it became true, coming back from the dead to unintentionally scare you out of your wits when you mistake him for a burglar. While it was quite nice that he loves you beyond death, his inability to talk and his mobility need to be worked on again...

Yandere Trickster God who enjoys playing what he thinks are silly pranks on you, pranks that effectively destroy your day and perhaps ruin your life. You've always thought that you've had an unlucky streak, even if initially you didn't believe in superstitions. But really, every day seems to be going wrong in some capacity ― thunderstorms pour when you leave without an umbrella, your house keys mysteriously go missing when you arrive at your front door in the dead of night, your online deliveries never seem to arrive, etc. ― little inconveniences pile up to prevent you from enjoying something nice, essentially. It wasn't until you came across an abandoned shrine and prayed to whatever god is out there to give you a breather did the happenings stop, and an oddly charming, ethereal asshole comes into your life to physically cause your frustrations.

[ace-of-gay]

Omg i got this cute idea!

Loki is and his little one are playing hide and seek and he thinks it’s so easy to find her and always played along like he can’t find her (but he sees her usually somewhere)

So this time it’s the same, he spottet her home slippers (not sure what you call your indoor shoes) underneath the curtains… so he plays along but when he is like „ I got you!“ and looked behind the curtains she isn’t there! So she really tricked the god of mischief 😂😍

Little trickster

Loki x little reader

843 words

Warnings: age regression, names like bubs, baby, tiny, pumpkin etc. Activities like playing with toys, watching movie, climbing, hiding in dark space. Items like stuffies and paci

No weight, skin color, or gender mentioned.

Age regression is a copuling mechanism if you dont like it dont read it or educate yourself on the topic

Any hate will be deleted

Youd been very antsy and rowdy today, moving and going all over the place, loki would find it hard to keep your attention on one thing when it came to days like this, it felt as though you needed a more one on one interactive day between yourself and him.

He knew your little mind was just all over the place and while it wasn’t easy, he was happy to get through the day with you.

You were settled in the living room, a movie on the television and your shape sorter, placing the green cube in the square hole you look up at him as he takes your hands into his own and shakes them in the air, cheering, “good job munchkin! How bout this one? Can you tell daddy the color and shape of this one?” Holding out the new shape you look at it for a moment, than to him, the tv and back to him.

“Mmm, no, I don’t wanna do this no more, it cane out more as a whine than a statement.

You felt scattered. Your mind and thoughts everywhere, that is until you got the fantastic idea to play hide and seek, it didn’t take too much effort to hide so of course itd be perfect.

Taking his hands pulling with all your might, he starts to give in bringing a smile to your face until he went limp and flopped down bringing you down into his arms, tickling your sides.

Writhing and consumed by giggles he rolled over scattering silly kisses across your face.

Finally stopping his tickle attack he helps you sit up.

“Now what is it you wanted to do?”

He helps you up and places his hands on his hips waiting.

No one ever saw him like this, only you, hes caring and encouraging just for you.

“ can we hide an seek!” You request cheerfully.

Crossing his arms pretending to to think he taps his foot a couple times, “I don’t see why not, do you want me to be the counter first?”

Nodding, you run off as soon as he closes his eyes, counting he can hear you running about the floor, your giggles and a door shutting.

“Ready or not hear I come!”

During hide and seek he always tried to make it look like he had no idea where you where but truth is you hid in the same three spots, hed search the rooms vaguely, looking for your slippers in his peripheral vision, after finding them he would slowly center in while looking around closer and closer to your spot.

Your favorite spot was behind the curtains because they would flow so effortlessly around you, he quickly pulled the curtain to the side jumping forward, the excitement quickly rushing from him in a cold shock.

While yes he looked in your normal spits he also checked others aswell.

He picked up his pace checking both high and low, he couldn’t find you anywhere.

Staying as quiet as you could you peered down from the false ceiling loft, you’ve lived here longer than he has and he had never found the lofted space, it honestly looked like a drop ceiling so he had suspected nothing, the best part about this spot is you could basically watch him when he walked, well more rushed down the hall im search of you, biting your stuffy to stifle your giggles, you had plenty of entertainment to keep you occupied.

“Friday, where’s (y/n)?” He sounded urgent, terrified you were somehow in danger.

“Tiny is on your communal floor with you” Friday returns.

He head back over to the kitchen area to check cupboards again, while peeking over the small lip over the hall way your paci clamped tightly in your hand, you go to sit back quickly to stifle more giggles, while doing so your paci caught the edge and tugged itself out of your grasp.

The clatter of your paci falling and hitting the hard wood floor caught his attention, zeroing in what area you must be in.

Leaning as far back into the darkness of the loft space as possible you clamp both hands over your mouth, silently writhing in humorous desperation to laugh.

“Its not nice to throw stuff pumpkin, can you come out for me please? You’ve won baby please come out”

You for the last time lean over the opening, you can see him peering into your playroom scanning it for your presence.

“Boo��� you whisper loud enough for him to hear, his head shoots up to look at you peeking down from what he thought was just an uncovered vent over a bookshelf in the hall.

“What in the world are you doing up there bubs?”

“Was hiding, was best spot” you cheer while carefully climbing down, he pulls you into his arms and squeezes you tight, scatting kisses to the side of your head, “I thought I lost you and you were hurt you sneaky rascal, don’t scare me like that again you silly goose”

Im sorry its shorter than usual, i have tried to post this three times but my internet has been dodgy and my phone freezes and i just realized a bit ago that it never posted once again, i just thought i wasnt getting notifications again, nope, stupid phone doing stupid things.

[da-birb-writes-sometimes]

Reader’s Cooking is Worse than Lilia’s?!  -Pomefiore Edition

Somehow, your cooking is worse than Lilia’s. Was it always like this, or did travelling to TWST change it?

Characters: Vil Schoenheit, Rook Hunt, Epel Felmier

Content: platonic, crack, gender neutral reader

Find the rest of the Series: Heartslabyul, Savanaclaw, Octavinelle, Scarabia, Ignihyde, Diasomnia

Author’s Note; As a reminder, do not put my work — or others for that matter — into AI as it steals. Link to Masterlist

Vil Schoenheit

He has an actual excuse to not eat your cooking, and unlike Cater, he is on a diet. Whenever you visit him, he has made abundantly clear that you are not to bring in any food from outside or set foot in the kitchen. The last thing he wants is people getting sick, because he cares.

He will have Rook track your movements, and asks how you manage to survive off your vile cooking. One day though, Rook doesn’t come back on time. This isn’t like him so Vil goes off looking for him.

Turns out Rook was also in on the ‘let’s destroy the Ramshackle kitchen to keep everyone safe’ club. Vil isn’t happy, but he takes this opportunity to snatch some food to do tests on for future poisons.

He does hope to find a cure for you though, even if it isn’t a curse. Wait, where’s Epel?

Rook Hunt

Oh, he’s known about your talent in the kitchen since day one. So it turns out everyone is scared of you because of it. He chuckles to himself and is content to just stay on the sidelines… for now.

He still hasn’t gotten a conclusive answer for Vil on how you survive off of your cooking. But he has seen Deuce crying as he left Ramshackle. Soon though, he grows bored of just watching the hijinks and secretly starts hiding your cooking supplies himself.

Whenever you bring food to Pomefiore he gracefully accepts it, and when your back is turned he dumps it into the fireplace and watches it burn. Got to make sure that he doesn’t leave any evidence!

He’s content watching the others lament, and you looking everywhere for the items he’s hidden. Maybe next time, Trickster and best of luck, Epel! 

Epel Felmier

Yeah, he’s not eating that crap. Will he get scolded by Vil for saying that to your face? Most definitely. The only way he’ll eat it is if Ace mocks him for being a coward. Oh dear, not again...

Regardless, Vil will be pissed, since Epel is now sick. So when he turns back up at Pomefiore with a concerned Y/N holding him up, he starts praying to the Seven for luck. Luck or not, he passes out and comes to a few hours later.

He will distract you from Ace, Deuce and Grim long enough so that you can’t use the kitchen. He also could have sworn he saw Rook in there one time, but he doesn’t really want to question his odd vice dorm warden about what he gets up to.

Secretly, he’s happy that Vil has a strict no outside food rule for Pomefiore if it means that he’s safe from you and your food.

[rendy-a]

Ready to Dance with the Third Years

This is the last preview before the event comes. I'll probably get to 500 followers some time this week, so watch for it! I hope you've been enjoying these little mood-setting fics until then.

“Awe, come on, Prefect,” Cater wined, “Just one shot?”  You rolled your eyes back at him, “And who would I even dance with?”  Today you were in the courtyard with the third year students turning it into a ballroom dance space via magic.  Well, mostly magic.  You were just trailing around the seniors and doing any odd task they handed to you.  When Cater had called you over, you expected some odd job to run and not…this.  “This place is totally camable but I just need some dancing to really light up those likes.  Come on, Prefect, do a friend a favor?” 

You hesitate; it’s not that you are unwilling its just that you don’t know how to dance.  You hesitatingly admit to this face and Cater is astonished.  What?  It’s not like everyone knows how to dance!  Looking for back-up, you call over to Trey, “You understand, right Trey?  Just not everyone knows how to do these fancy dances.”  He adjusts his glasses and gives you a surprisingly evil looking grin, “Oh, I can’t say I do, Prefect.  I’ve been dancing with Riddle since we were kids.”  Your expression must look astonished based off the laughter of the Heartslabyul boys.  “Yeah, Riddle always did enjoy orderly ballroom dances and liked to teach Chey’na and I.”  You could well picture it.

That doesn’t mean that everyone dances though!  You sweep your gaze over the room, looking for an ally in this.  You mistakenly rest your eyes for just a short moment on Rook but that was too long to escape notice.  In fact, by the way he quickly rose and came to join you in your conversation, it was obvious that he had been listening.  “Why, Trickster, you have not yet had the joy of dancing with a partner?  C'est vrai?”  You don’t respond but that in no way discourages Rook from continuing on.  With a dramatic gesture, he lays his hand to his head, “To never feel the heat of your dear one in your arms as you twirl beneath the moonlight?  Quelle dommage!  But Trickster, is this not the perfect opportunity to learn?”

Then, with a sly look on his face, he adds, “Perhaps you shall even find a Prince Charming to partner with,” and looks pointedly at a garden bench.  You look tentatively over it and find an annoyed Leona napping on the other side.  He seems as though he intends to ignore you but Rook approaches the end of the bench and allows Leona’s tail, flicking in agitation, to brush against his glove.  In a moment, Leona is up and sliding to the far end of the bench and away from the huntsman.  Rook smiles, “Why it is Roi des Lions!  I wonder what brings you to this bench?” 

Trey and Cater join you in leering over the side of the bench, all present knowing that Leona is here slacking off from duty.  You smile as wickedly as the others, “Gee Leona, what ARE you doing over here?”  Leona considers the attention, twitches an ear and remarks, “So the Herbivore needs to learn to dance, huh?”  You point your finger at him and shout, “Don’t change the subject!”  It’s no use though, he has appealed to the crowd successfully and Cater jumps right onboard, “Yeah, I’m going to get a great shot of the Prefect dancing for my magicam…just as soon as they learn how!”  You consider trying to appeal to Trey but when you turn your head, you see he now has that same wicked smile directed at you.  Traitor.

You scratch your head thoughtfully and attempt to weasel your way out of the situation, “It’s not so much that I NEED to learn to dance, its more like I just…am choosing not to dance.  Be…because there isn’t any music.  I mean, if there was music, I totally would but there isn’t so…”  Then you give your shoulders an exaggerated shrug as if to say, ‘Looks like there is nothing to be done.’  Suddenly, a dulcet tune played on violin reverberates in the courtyard.  Your expression drops in dismay as you turn to find Lilia holding an instrument.  “It’s quite a shame Malleus isn’t here.  He is far better at playing this one than I.  Unfortunately, it appears that someone failed to deliver an invitation to him.”  Cater guiltily looks away.  “However, I’d still be delighted to play a tune for the Prefect so they can learn to dance.  Dancing is an essential skill for young people.”  He then gives you a delighted chuckle, mischief sparkling in his eyes.

You force out a thin smile, “Oh, great.  Thanks ever so much, Lilia.”  You’ve amused him, you see it in his face full of plump cheek and gentle eyes.  It was nothing like the smile Leona was giving you; that was sharp, predatory, and calculating.  “So, what’s it going to be, Herbivore?  More excuses or are you going to show me what you’ve got?”  You raise your chin and give him the haughtiest look you could manage, “Well, Your Highness, if you are going to call for me to dance, how shall I refuse?”  Then you turn as you walk to position and jibe, “I just hope your feet feel the same way afterwards.” 

Leona gives you a tight look, but you feel that warning is fair.  You weren’t wrong, learning to dance was a bit more difficult than you expected.  It’s not even that you stepped on his feet on purpose, it’s more like you think you’ve finally gotten the steps only to have him turn unexpectedly or move in a different way and suddenly, there you are stomping all over his toes.  Leona was not amused but it felt like everyone else was.  You could see the snickering each time you stumbled.  Finally, someone was unable to hold it in, “Kwe he he!” came a laugh from the shadows and Leona whips his head around and snarks, “If you think you can do better, Radish Sprouts, feel free to cut in!”  A yelp and flare of flame confirms Leona had identified the source of laughter correctly.

Idia slowly creeps out from behind a tree and looks nervously at the group.  You can tell he is mumbling but cannot make out the words.  From the way Leona’s mouth creases into a tight line, you suspect he can.  “Does Idia know how to dance?” you ask in disbelief.  Idia gets a crazed half grin showcasing his sharp teeth and brags, “You’re a total noob.  I’ve got high score on all the Doko Dance games.  I’ve also memorized every cheer for my favorite idol groups.  Some might call me a pro even!”  Leona doesn’t enjoy the challenge and remarks dryly, “Well, well, it looks like Radish Sprouts wants to dance with the star of the ball after all.” Then he swivels you to face Idia and gives you a little push. 

You crash into Idia and its like you’ve tripped some switch to send him into panic mode.  The smile is wiped from his face and his fiery hair flames into a brighter red tone.  “What happened?  How did I trigger so much aggro?  I need to perform a stealth check to get out of this situation.  I don’t want to get paired up with the noob on this mission!”  Unfortunately, this time you are close enough to Idia to hear his rambling.  You aren’t mad, not really, because you’ve long since come to understand that Idia just is this way.  He can be annoying but is mostly harmless, except to your ego.

A sharp clicking of heals alerts you to someone’s approach.  “Is this where everyone has been?  I’ve finished the Pomefiore section flawlessly, but it looks like the rest of you still have work to do.” Vil finished his rebuke in a cold tone.  Idia squeeks and rushes off.  The others leave in a much more casual manner but seem to agree it’s not worth going against Vil over.  Except for Leona.  He bares his teeth and drawls, “I was so looking forward to the work, but it seems the poor Herbivore here needs a Prince to teach them to dance.”  He steps toward you, but Vil smoothly steps in between to block him.

“I may not be a real prince, but I play one on TV.  I assure you that, by the time the set-up is finished, I’ll have the Prefect dancing to the Pomefiore standard.” Vil cooly replies.  Leona gives a mock bow and saunters off to prod his dorm students into finishing the Savanahclaw chores.  You give Vil an awkward smile, “Gee, thanks for helping me.”  He smiles at you in a way that isn’t comforting at all, “Don’t be so eager to thank me, Prefect.  I am quite the demanding teacher.” 

You found this to be true.  Vil danced with an easy grace and skillfully avoided your clumsy steps.  Each mistake though was met with unforgiving correction.  It was a hard afternoon of practice but true to his word, by the time the sun was beginning to set, you could passably waltz.  You remarked on how good he was at teaching dance.  “I should be.  I’ve had my fair share of whipping country potatoes into shape.  You are hardly even the worst case I’ve had this year,” he responds with an amused grin.  You picture Epel when he says this and silently promise to treat him to something nice at lunch tomorrow. 

Finally, the last of the tasks needed for the goodwill dance are complete.  You head home to Ramshackle, weary but satisfied.  As you pass along the fence of the dorm, you spot some tell-tale green lights in the distance.  A small grin alights your face and you quicken your pace.  “Tsunataro!” you greet.  In the twilight, the fae prince was quite an intimidating sight but never seemed as such to you.  A barely perceivable smile sits on his lips as he returns the greeting.  “You missed the set-up earlier,” you comment, “were you busy?”  A strike of lightning flashes in the distance and you decide you should maybe let that subject drop.

“Well, it was boring anyway.  You didn’t really miss anything,” you begin, “Oh!  Except for one thing!  I learned to dance.”  You allow a prideful expression to grace your face.  “So now I’m fully ready to dance with the next damsel or Prince I come across.”  Malleus chuckles deeply, “Oh, so you are requesting a dance from me, Prefect?”  You startle, realizing how your random comment could be interpreted that way, “Oh no, not…I mean yes.  I do request the honor of a dance.  If you are willing…”  You trail off and look nervously at your friend.  When he smiles at you and gives a hearty laugh, you smile back before holding out your hand. 

The goodwill dance was only a few days away, but you were no longer afraid.  In this single day, you’d danced with a celebrity and two princes.  The time to be nervous was over.  You were the Prefect of Ramshackle dorm and a traveler of worlds.  This dance had better be prepared for you!  You grin up at the darkening sky, feeling your confidence surge.  You were ready to be the star of your own story.  Starting with this dance.

[buckybarnesfanfiction]

'Such Sweet Revenge' by ali_aliska

https://archiveofourown.org/works/15146219/chapters/35123417

This is one of the best fanfictions I've ever read. ali_aliska is one of the best WinterIron/Marvel fanfiction writers ever.

As always, all credit goes to ali_aliska. I OWN NOTHING. THIS IS NOT MY WORK!!!!

I am just premoting it because it is so, so good!

Author's Summary:

When the Rogues are back in the States after being pardoned, the New Avengers want nothing to do with them and as far as Tony is concerned, if he never speaks to them again, it'll be too soon. After all, he didn't spend the last year putting himself (and his family) back together only for his former co-workers to ruin all of his hard work.

But then he gets a hand-written letter from the Winter Soldier himself, apologizing for the events that transpired and an off-handed comment from Rhodey about Rogers failing to take care of an obviously miserable Bucky Barnes sets in motion Tony's new, oh-so-evil plan to get some payback.

After all, what better revenge than to steal the Winter Soldier away from his best friend?

The only problem: Tony sucks at being vengeful, but apparently he's an expert at inadvertently falling in love.

Excerpt from chapter 1:

Tony admired the bright doodles of Iron Man, Spider-Man, and a very Picasso-esque rendition of the Wasp one last time and placed the last letter on top of new pile next to him. With nothing else left to read, he studied the damn white envelope still sitting innocuously on the other end of the bed. 

He should burn it. He should take the damn thing down to the lab and burn it in the incinerator, scatter the ashes from the top of Stark Tower, and maybe invoke Loki’s name in an incantation or something. Tony was not ashamed to admit that he was petty enough to sic the Trickster god on Rogers.

He should do all those things, but already he resigned himself to the fact that curiosity would get the best of him. It was both one of his best and most reckless personality traits. 

Kudos to Rogers for using snail mail (again) to get a direct line of communication to Tony.

Alright, let’s see what kind of half-assed apologies and passive aggressive nonsense he came up with this time. At least there’s no insulting, out-of-date tech to go along with this letter.

He reached for the envelope, tore it open, unfolded the paper, and promptly realized that this wasn’t Rogers’ tidy scrawl (he hated that he had the man’s handwriting memorized). A glance at signature towards the bottom of the letter confirmed his suspicions.

Huh.

With a raised eyebrow and renewed curiosity, Tony leaned back and began to read.

Mr. Stark,

I wasn’t sure this letter would get to you, but I had to try. I thought about meeting you in person (you’re too easy to track down for someone of your importance), but that would have been both imposing and selfish.

Even this is selfish. I know no apology will fix what I’ve done. It won’t bring your parents back, it won’t bring anyone I killed back to life. It won’t fix what happened between you, Steve and the others either. Might not help you at all, so this apology, it’s selfish then, isn’t it? Just to help me sleep better at night. If it makes a difference, I still won’t be able to sleep.

But for whatever it’s worth, I am sorry. I’m so sorry. For your parents, for fighting you in Germany without knowing anymore than what Steve had told me. I’m sorry for fighting you in Siberia, for leaving you behind when you were hurt.

I wish you would’ve taken more than just my arm back in that bunker. 

I’m not sure if there’s something I can do to make up for what happened. I don’t have money and most of my skillsets are frowned upon, but if there is any way I can help, or if you just want to shoot me between the eyes to even out the score, just say so.

Being back in the States, I’ve had a lot of time to think. Can’t sleep with that damn witch across the hall, so I got nothing but time. I made mistakes, hurt people who weren’t my enemies. First time I was free of Hydra’s control and all I did was do more damage. 

I’ve been reading up on your work. Green energy, technology, the new Accords. All of you are doing amazing work and I’m sorry Steve and the others are getting in the way of that. They shouldn’t have ambushed Rhodes and Danvers like that. A damn charity event for sick kids. I don’t know what they were thinking. Rhodes and Danvers held their own though. Soldiers through and through.

Steve is also thinking about coming to that green energy conference next month. Thinks he can get a moment with you because you’re one of the speakers and the security isn’t as strict. No idea if this letter gets to you in time, and knowing you, you probably already know, but thought I should warn you.

They used some of your tech to help with the triggers, by the way. Thank you for that too. T’Challa’s sister didn’t want to be involved though and I don’t blame her, but the other doctors did well enough with the tech. My brain feels like it’s been scrubbed raw, but at least some lunatic won’t be able to control me anymore. Thank you for giving me that freedom. Again, I have nothing to give back but empty words.

You seem like a good man. I wish I got the chance to know you under different circumstances, but I guess that’s selfish too.

Wherever life takes you, I wish you well.

Sincerely,

James Buchanan Barnes

“Huh…” Tony exhaled and kept staring at the letter in his hands. 

Not what I expected. At all.

[bigsoftmarshmallow]

How would the Ganondorfs (Wind Waker, Ocarina of Time, Twilight Princess, Hyrule Warriors, and Tears of the Kingdom) handle their lover playing a prank on them? Like they go to sit down in a chair, as their lover offers to make them a drink and massage their shoulders, and when they sit down, a very loud POP comes out of no where, startling them. Their lover collapses in giggling.

Wind Waker Ganondorf

Reaction:

Initial Response: Ganondorf would be momentarily startled by the loud pop. His eyes would widen in surprise, and he might even tense up, ready to confront any threat.

Realization: As he sees his lover collapsing in giggles, his surprise would shift to mild irritation mixed with amusement.

Response: He would shake his head, a smirk playing on his lips. "You think this is funny?" he would say with mock sternness. His lover’s laughter would be infectious, and soon enough, he’d be chuckling too.

Emotional Response:

Feeling: He would feel a mixture of amusement and warmth. The prank would remind him of the light-hearted side of life, something he rarely gets to enjoy.

Outcome: He might playfully vow to get even, turning the prank into a fun game between them.

Ocarina of Time Ganondorf

Reaction:

Initial Response: Ganondorf would be visibly startled and possibly annoyed by the pop. He’d glance around suspiciously, momentarily on edge.

Realization: Upon seeing his lover laughing uncontrollably, his expression would soften, though he’d try to maintain his composure.

Response: He’d let out a sigh, trying to hide his amusement. "You have a strange sense of humor," he’d say dryly, but the corner of his mouth would twitch into a reluctant smile.

Emotional Response:

Feeling: He’d feel a mix of exasperation and affection. The prank would show him the lighter side of his lover’s personality.

Outcome: He’d be more cautious around them for a while, but he’d also appreciate the joy they bring into his life.

Twilight Princess Ganondorf

Reaction:

Initial Response: Ganondorf would be momentarily taken aback by the pop, his stern demeanor cracking for just a moment.

Realization: Seeing his lover laughing would cause him to sigh deeply, trying to keep his irritation in check.

Response: He’d cross his arms, looking down at his lover with a mixture of sternness and amusement. "I see you’ve found a way to amuse yourself," he’d say, his voice laced with mock severity.

Emotional Response:

Feeling: He’d feel a combination of annoyance and endearment. The prank would be a reminder of the playfulness his lover brings to his otherwise serious life.

Outcome: He’d eventually chuckle and might even plan a subtle revenge prank, enjoying the playful dynamic.

Hyrule Warriors Ganondorf

Reaction:

Initial Response: Ganondorf would be startled and immediately alert, his warrior instincts kicking in.

Realization: When he sees his lover laughing, he’d raise an eyebrow, his initial annoyance fading.

Response: He’d chuckle deeply, shaking his head. "You’re quite the trickster," he’d say, clearly amused by the prank.

Emotional Response:

Feeling: He’d feel a mix of amusement and affection. The prank would add a layer of playfulness to their relationship.

Outcome: He’d laugh it off and might even play along, enjoying the light-hearted moment.

Tears of the Kingdom Ganondorf

Reaction:

Initial Response: Ganondorf would be momentarily surprised, his usually composed demeanor slipping.

Realization: As he sees his lover laughing, his eyes would soften, and he’d let out a resigned sigh.

Response: He’d smile slightly, shaking his head. "You never cease to surprise me," he’d say, his tone filled with affection.

Emotional Response:

Feeling: He’d feel a blend of amusement and deep affection. The prank would show him a lighter side of life, which he deeply appreciates.

Outcome: He’d laugh it off and might even consider playing a prank back, enjoying the playful exchange.

In each case, the Ganondorfs would initially be startled by the prank, but their reactions would quickly shift to amusement and affection upon realizing it was their lover’s doing. The prank would highlight the playful and loving dynamics of their relationship, reminding them of the joy and light their soulmate brings into their lives.

[imminent-danger-came]

do you think mks cosmic backstory conflicts with the previous conflict of his insecurities of being the wrong successor?

Not at all!

When it comes down to it, MK's main flaw is his lack of belief in himself ("Just believe in yourself! Even a smidge makes all the difference")—that's him at his core. He's also identity issues the character ("I'm not the Monkey King okay!" "You're right—you're the Monkie Kid! You have to find your own way to win."), and I think s4 laid into this quite nicely.

Throughout seasons 1 and 2 MK was trying to live up to the legacy of "Monkey King". That's what 1x06 and 1x09 are motivated by—MK is trying to make himself stronger and more like Wukong ("I just wanted to be good enough—like you."). Really 2x05 just worsened a problem MK already had. He was already having doubts about being the Monkie Kid, and SWK leaving in 2x01 was a crack in an already unstable foundation. So then in 2x06 and 2x09 you have MK desperately trying to get stronger, to be a sort of Monkey King stand in ("Pretty soon, Monkey King won't even need to come back!"), and that all comes crashing down in 2x10. And, not only does MK fail, he loses the staff and his powers.

This takes us to 3x01, where MK IMMEDIATELY tries to be Wukong once again:

Sun Wukong: "Kid, why did ya-" MK: "Uh, well yeah, I was trying to do you in the omelet story! Do the weird impulsive Monkey King thing and escape the bad guy."

Sun Wukong: "Well, I mean- Ne Zha ain't really a bad guy but- did you forget about the part where I got really hurt?"

(3x01 On The Run) (Hi MK good guy v bad guy mentality)

-

MK doesn't refer to himself as the Monkie Kid again until after he's able to use gold vision in 3x03, listing off a few of his labels:

"But I, Monkie Kid, delivery boy, somewhat equal to heaven—saw right through your trick." (3x03 Smartie Kid; another label)

Which, MK and his labels are a big deal ("Hero"/"Warrior" in 2x07, Noodle Boy, Successor, the "Plan Man" in 4x12). It's specifically what the curse antagonizes MK with in s4:

Subodhi: “Who or what you are, even I do not know the answer—but of one thing, I am certain: fate has plans for you! Great plans, or foul? Time will tell.” MK: "I- I can't be! I'm just MK!" Subodhi: "The Monkie Kid?" MK: *Gasps*

-

Curse MK: "Tell me, what do you think we are, honestly, cause I have been DYING to hear us say it, out loud." MK: "What kind of a question is that? I'm just- I'm just MK, a noodle delivery guy with the powers of the Monkey King, no biggie."

-

Curse MK: "Seriously? You still think we're just some noodle delivery guy? You can't remember where you came from, and we got ALL this power, and you never once thought, why us? What are we, what is our purpose?" MK: "Of course I thought about it! I mean- maybe, I was gonna thought about it I just- I just want to be me. To be MK!" Curse MK: "Yeah well, we all know exactly where that leads, don't we." Lady Bone Demon Echo: "To pain."

-

Curse MK: "We're just like Wukong, a fraud! A trickster! Why would our legacy be any different?"

-

MK: "No, no you're wrong I'm- I'm not!" Curse MK: "Not what, some Monkey Demon thing destined to bring chaos upon the world? Come on, use your words big brained boy, say it, what are we?"

-

Curse MK: "You can see it, can't you? This is your fate. Your friends will turn on you, seeing you for the monster you will become! They will destroy you, harbinger of chaos."

-

There's all of these different things MK is either trying to be or trying to not be, which all plays back into his identity. It also all plays back to one thing: his lack of belief in himself.

He's either not enough like Wukong or too much like his mentor. He's either not strong enough or too strong, destined to cause nothing but chaos and destruction. He's either not going to be able to protect the people he cares about, or he's going to be the very thing that hurts them. It's the same problem, just on different sides of the spectrum.

The 3x14 "Do you still really think the universe wants anything, from any of us?" to 4x08 "Until I know what I am, what my destiny is? I can't risk hurting the people I care about—the one's I have left" pipeline is both wild and important to note. It's the switch from MK believing he's nothing special, to believing he's the very "harbinger of chaos". It's all about his self-perception.

And honestly, when it comes down to it, he probably still believes he's the wrong successor, just for very different reasons now. You and I both know that there was no other choice for a protégé—who else would have been able to wield the Monkey King's staff and have his powers—but I doubt MK is in a place to come to terms with that. I think that realization is going to be part of his downward spiral next season, along with being one of the things that instigates the SWK V MK fight.

It's very on point that the way MK comforts Wukong at the end of 4x11 is through reaffirming his role as the "Monkey King":

MK: "Monkey King- I'm not ready to not have a mentor. Azure needs to be stopped but- we need you. I need you- to be the Monkey King."

(4x11 A Lifetime of Mistakes)

-

While the way he antagonizes Azure is to threaten his role as a Hero (also referencing his role as an Uncle, and before that his role as a friend):

MK: "Come on! Come on! Come on Unkie Lion, you're the big hero right? Then prove it. Show me!"

(4x13 Rip and Tear)

-

*Gestures financially* IDENTITY

Bonus "What I am" parallels post because it's pretty relevant I feellmk

[maria021015]

“Sorry, but I can't let you walk out with this. It's way above the legal voltage limit.” Parish refused to hand over the metal baton along with the rest of the belongings that had been seized upon Chris Argent and Derek Hale’s arrest.

“I only use it for hunting,” Chris defended himself, not wishing to part from the device that had saved him from many a hairy situation. At his lack of description of what he used it to hunt, Derek shot the man a pointedly exasperated look. Argent could do nothing but roll his eyes in response.

“Yeah, well, I'm pretty sure you could use it to jump-start a 747.” The young deputy sassed, not budging on his decision.

“This property belongs to me, and the charges were dropped,” Chris continued to argue the point. “Although, I'm not exactly sure who's responsible for that…”

“I am,” A familiar voice spoke up as Sheriff Stilinski entered the space. Both Chris and Derek were surprised to see the man, considering he’d been away for several days consulting with medical professionals regarding Stiles’ MRI results. “I'll take care of this, Parrish.”

“Stilinski, I'm not kidding - this thing's a few watts from being a lightsaber.” Parish scoffed, but his superior officer waved him away.

“I said I'll take care of it,” Stilinski nodded, and Parish finally conceded, leaving the Sheriff to take charge.

“I didn’t expect you back so soon,” Chris commented genuinely. He knew that if it were Allison whose brain scans had come back displaying signs of frontotemporal dementia, he wouldn’t be returning to work any time soon.

“I expected you sooner,” Derek grunted gruffly, obviously bitter about being arrested for the second time for a murder he did not commit.

“The specialist I saw in LA told me the thing that every doctor says when he's trying to avoid a lawsuit - ‘We can't say for sure’. And then, I spoke with Melissa.” Noah pulled out an envelope of medical documents, placing two images side by side on the table. “These are brain scans - my wife's, and Stiles'. I knew they were similar, but those are the same. Exactly the same.”

“And I'm guessing this isn't possible?” Derek assumed, not betraying the slight sense of relief he’d felt when hearing the news.

“Not even remotely,” Stilinski shook his head, confirming what they all now knew to be true. Stiles had never had frontotemporal dementia.

“So, the trickster is still playing tricks,” Argent sighed heavily, staring at the identical brain scans laid before them.

“But why this trick?” The werewolf amongst them questioned the Nogitsune’s motives for such a thing.

“When I was in the Army, an officer told me, ‘If you want to defeat your enemy, you don't take away their courage - you take away their hope’." Noah quoted grimly.

“You don't look like a man who gives up hope easily,” Argent’s lips pulled into a faint smile.

“But Stiles might,” The Sheriff clarified his concern. “If this thing inside him...if it's using his mother's disease as some sort of psychological trick, then this isn't just a fight for his body. It's also a fight for his mind. Right?”

“You know, he's left people severely injured,” Chris cleared his throat, hating to be the one to bring it up. Stiles was Noah’s son, but he was also a threat that needed to be dealt with as such. He briefly wondered if it had been Allison, what would he have done? In all honesty, he didn’t even know the answer to his own question.

“...And others severely dead,” Derek chimed in harshly, not holding back.

“That's why I need the two of you,” Noah nodded in understanding. “I need people who are experienced in this kind of thing. I need you to help me stop him. Both of them.”

Both Chris and Derek picked up on what the Sheriff was not saying. “And by stop them, you mean trap them.” He deduced. Noah confirmed the man’s statement with a short nod.

“Then we’re going to need a lot more help than just the three of us,” Derek stated.

“This is everything non-lethal I could find…” Allison led them into the Argent’s study, gesturing to the weapons she’d laid bare over the desktop.

“Take all of it,” Her father advised her, eyes scanning over the contents.

“What's the plan, here?” Noah asked with slight concern in his features at the assortment of gear.

“Our best shot right now is for Derek to try to pick up Stiles' scent at Eichen House - especially if he went through something stressful there,” Chris answered, knowing the chemosignals would be strongest there. “We find Stiles, we’ll find Zaida.”

“Should all four of us be going to the same place?” The Sheriff questioned the rationality of pouring all of their resources into one location.

“Where else have Stiles and Zaida been showing up?” Chris glanced at his daughter for the information. Being arrested had meant he and Derek had been mostly out of the loop.

“School...the hospital…” Allison began listing places from the top of her head.

“Okay, hold on - we did this already. He disappeared, we started looking for him...then walked right into a trap at the hospital.” Derek pointed out in frustration, eyes opening to the pattern.

“...He's getting us to repeat the same moves.” Chris agreed with a grumble of realisation.

“So, what do we do? Wait for them to come to us?” Allison suggested unsurely.

“We can't.” Derek shook his head. “Not if the Oni find them when the sun goes down.”

“Scott's working on that right now with Kira,” Stilinski informed them, having been told by the werewolf himself that they were speaking with Kira’s mother, who apparently controlled the Oni.

“That's the problem - we're all trying to outfox the Fox,” Argent commented lowly.

“Listen…I'll understand if anyone wants to back out,” The Sheriff put out the disclaimer, secretly hoping no one would balk from their mission. Like Derek had said - he needed all the help they could get. Noah had never seen Zaida in action but from the sound of things she was the one to watch out for, and they’d never known until she wasn’t on their side anymore.

“Are you kidding? Zaida and Stiles are two of my best friends. We’re more than that - we’re a family. A pack.” Allison scoffed at the notion, looking to the others in the room. “I’m not going to give up on them. We’re going to get them back.”

“I won't be the first Wolf to run from a Fox,” Derek set his jaw stubbornly as he locked eyes with the huntress.

“Apparently, I'm carrying a lightsaber…” Chris held up the metal baton with a slight smile. None of them was going to be backing away from this.

“Dad, you and Derek hit Eichen House. Sheriff, it's you and me in the hospital. We all meet in the school.” Allison decided, calling the shots like a true Argent matriarch. As the huntress and the Sheriff split from the group, leaving to head towards the hospital, Chris stayed behind.

“...Making sure you have a few lethal options, just in case?” Derek arched a brow at the man, who was slipping pistols into hidden holsters.

“I like to prepare for the worst,” Chris answered grimly. He only prayed he wouldn't have to use them.

“You know what? I don't know how you guys do it. You're all so strong. You're fearless. Hell, you even manage to keep your grades up…” Noah Stilinski rubbed his hand over his face, his nerves jittering and stress overcoming him as they waited in the silent elevator of Beacon Hills Memorial Hospital. If the situation was getting to him - a full-grown man with army experience who works in law enforcement - how were the others still standing? How had they done it all this time alone, without the help of their parents?

“I am failing Econ…” Allison said slowly with a glum demeanour. The man clearly had more faith in them than was warranted.

“Is that Coach's class?” Noah questioned, remembering an interview he’d had with the teacher once about Stiles detailing the entire history of the male human anatomy for his Econ exam. When Allison dipped her chin confirmation he reassured her. “Well, I'll have a talk with him.”

Instead of finding the man’s words comforting, Allison felt her resolve crumble. She’d been holding on by a thread, but that has swiftly snapped at hearing of the man’s misplaced trust. She couldn’t do this. She couldn’t lead the Argents - it was largely because of her that their family had been decimated, leaving only herself and her father. Her features twisted as the tears prickled at her eyes and fell. She was only a teenager and here she was with a crushing weight on her shoulders. She suddenly wasn’t sure of anything - of any decision she’d made since moving to Beacon Hills. Her friends were scattered across town, all desperately trying to keep up with the world crumbling around them. Xander was on life support and still hadn’t woken since his surgery, Isaac was lying in a hospital bed, she was losing Scott more and more every day. Scott , who was with Kira - whom Allison still didn’t fully trust - trying to stop her mother from sending assassins after Stiles and Zaida. Her father was alone with Derek and the last time one of her parents was alone with Derek…Well, her mother had died. Every time they went through something like this together, the others would remind her that they’d made it - that they were the lucky ones because they’d all survived. But they hadn’t all survived. At least, not to Allison. Kate hadn’t survived. Her mother hadn’t. Maybe no one else in their pack had been impacted as Allison had, but when would their luck start to run out? Would it be today? Tomorrow? Her heart trembled at the notion.

Upon seeing the girl’s reaction, Noah reached for the kill switch, forcing the elevator to stop in its tracks and buy them some more time away from the prying eyes of others. “Are you okay?” His brows creased in sympathy as he tilted his head at her with a soft voice. “Hey, you okay?”

“I'm not fearless...I'm terri-terrified. I'm always terrified.” Allison shook her head, choking out her words between sobs. “I...I act like I know what I'm doing, but I don't. I don't know if Isaac is dying right now...I don't know if I made a mistake with Scott...I don't know what my dad is thinking...I don't know if we should trust Derek...I don't know if I’m ever going to look into Zaida’s eyes and see my friend again…I don’t know if we’ll be able to save her and Stiles…I don’t know…I don't know anything!”

“You know what's funny? You sound just like a cop.” Noah’s lips smiled slightly in a supportive way as he recognised her sentiments, pulling her into a tight hug. She sounded like him - like the cacophony of worries that had been sounding off in his mind since his son had started having these nightmares. Since Stiles had gone missing. Since Noah had found out what was truly happening in Stiles’ head - and Zaida’s. Zaida, whom he considered the daughter he’d never had and hoped one day it would come true. “Hey…You're gonna be okay.”

“Okay,” Allison nodded, her voice shaking and she took control back over her breathing. Just as she managed to pull herself back together - shattered piece by shattered piece - she heard an alert go off. Pulling away from the Sheriff, her brows drew together in a curious frown. “What's that?”

“Someone's breaking into my house…” Noah recognised the sound and pulled out his phone to see a notification from his home security system. Clicking into the app, he explained it to Allison. “After Stiles started sleepwalking, I had some safety precautions put in - motion sensors, cameras…”

Leaning over to see the live video feed up on the Sheriff’s phone, she saw Stiles sitting on a bed and wiggling his fingers as he stared up at the camera tauntingly. “Is that his room?” She asked, a newfound sense of urgency instilling in her.

“What is all this? What are these sticky notes for?” Chris glared down at the chessboard the Nogitsune had left on the desktop in Stiles’ room.

“This is what Stiles used to try and explain to me about...all of you,” Noah recalled that strange conversation that he hadn’t quite believed at the time it had happened.

“Well, maybe it's a message from Stiles - the real Stiles,” Allison suggested, hope shining in her wide brown eyes. Her fingers brushed the top of the white queen labelled with Zaida’s name as her brain whirred over the possible hidden messages behind the placement of the pieces.

“Do you think there's any reason my name's on the king?” Derek asked with a raised brow.

“Well, you're heavily guarded…” Noah offered. “Though, I guess the alarming detail is that you're one move from being in checkmate.”

“It's not a message from Stiles - it's a threat from the Nogitsune.” Argent landed on the answer swiftly, looking at the board as a battlefield. “Look at the pieces and their purposes. Ethan, Aiden and Isaac are all pawns. Isaac’s been taken off the board, while Ethan, Aiden and Peter are all defending the king.”

“And Zaida’s the white queen, the most powerful player on the board, and the most unpredictable. She’s protecting the white king, but is also in a position to attack if she wants to.” The Sheriff analysed, picking up the white king piece. “I’m guessing this is supposed to be Stiles. The king is the most powerless piece and yet still the most important.”

“He’s trying to tell us we’ll have to get through Zaida to get to him, and getting through Zaida right now without hurting or killing her is pretty impossible,” Allison deduced, the cogs in her mind churning. “But he’s also unwittingly shown us his hand. Zaida is the power player - Deaton thinks she’s the reason the Nogitsune took Stiles, to take control of her through their telepathic connection. But the game is dependent on Stiles. Stiles is the one who has to be defeated to win, yet he’s hiding behind her. He’s been distracting us with her this whole time - when he made us believe she was the one possessed, when he made her kill all those people…He’ll do it again tonight.”

“So targeting Zaida is what he wants us to do,” Chris followed along.

“We need to call Deaton,” The huntress instructed, remembering the shot the veterinarian had used on the girl to inhibit her powers. “Find out if he has any more fennel.”

“Wait, if targeting Zaida is what the Nogitsune wants us to do, then why are we doing it?” Derek interjected, not seeing the sense in falling right into the fox’s ploy.

“If we do get her to attack…” Allison explained and reached for Zaida’s piece, sliding it across the board to where it lined up with the black knight - the one labelled with her name. T he naiad versus the huntress. By moving the white queen, there was an undefended opening around the white king. “It leaves Stiles vulnerable.”

Moving Zaida’s piece back to its original spot, Allison shifted the black rook labelled with her father’s name so that it had an unobstructed line to both the white king, and the black knight. “And the way to get her to attack, is to threaten the king. Only, Zaida is too valuable to risk losing, so she won’t place herself between you. ” The huntress added and instead of making the obvious moves, she repeated her earlier play and had the white queen take the black knight. When she was done, she locked eyes with her father. “She’ll come for me, betting on the fact that she’ll best me and that you will choose to protect me over capturing Stiles. You need to prove her wrong. Can you do that?”

Chris’ jaw locked as he was faced with the impossible question. Choosing the mission over his daughter… “If it’s between Stiles and you,” He muttered under his breath. “You can’t ask me to make that choice.”

“I’m not asking,” Allison’s gaze hardened. As the matriarch, this was her decision to make. “I’m telling .”

Chris couldn’t bring himself to say anything, he simply dipped his chin in a sombre nod of confirmation as conflict brewed within him. “If we’re going to get to them before the Oni do, we have to get moving.” He broke away from his daughter’s stern gaze to glance outside the window at the darkening sky.

“He's at the loft. That's what he's trying to tell us. And he wants us to come there.” Allison gestured to the board. “We just need to figure out how to capture Stiles once we get an opening.”

“This couldn't sound any more like a trap,” Derek grumbled, his arms crossed over his chest.

“I don't think it is…” Noah shook his head, leaning against the desk as his eyes fixated on the board.

“I think your opinion might be slightly biased, Sheriff…” The hunter pointed out.

“Hear me out! What we're dealing with here is basically someone who lacks motive - no rhyme or reason, right?” Noah began his explanation.

“Meaning what?” Argent raised a brow at the man.

“Our enemy is not a killer...It's a trickster.” The Sheriff identified the difference. In his experience, motive was the most powerful tool to predict an opponent’s actions. “The killing is just a by-product.”

“If you're trying to say it won't kill us, I'm not feeling too confident about that…” The werewolf trailed off sarcastically.

“It won't. It wants irony. It wants to play a trick - it wants a joke. All we need to do is come up with a new punchline.” Noah reasoned.

“The sun is setting, Sheriff…” Argent reminded him of their time limit. “What do you have in mind?”

“Go ahead.” Noshiko held out the healed sword to her daughter. “It's yours now.”

“What if I don't want it?” Kira eyed the blade warily.

“You need it.” Noshiko’s lips pursed as the younger kitsune took the sword and whirled it a few times experimentally. Her surprise was written on her face when she realised how perfect it was in her hands. “You see? It gives you balance. My power is yours now, Kira. If the Oni cannot stop Stiles, you have to, the same as I did...And maybe seek out a wolf to help you…”

As Noshiko’s gaze landed on him, Scott’s jaw clenched in frustration at the waste of time. “You didn't tell us anything.” He stated.

“You want to save Stiles and Zaida? Kill the boy.” The woman surmised the moral of her story.

“You agree with this?” Scott turned to Mr Yukimura in disbelief.

“Sometimes, history does repeat itself, Scott.” The man admitted regrettfully.

“Only if you don't learn!” The werewolf exclaimed, refusing to give up. There had to be another way to save Stiles and Zaida. A way that didn’t involve risking either of their lives.

“But sometimes, even then, fate conspires against you.” Ken tilted his head.

“There's a way to save them. There has to be.” Scott’s eyes hardened determinedly, turning his back on the two and leaving.

“Kira…” Noshiko stepped towards her daughter, but Kira followed Scott out into the hallway, making her alliance clear. Once the two of them were gone, she held her last tail up to the golden light of the setting sun, seeing the concern in her husband’s eyes. “I'll take it somewhere safe.”

“That's not what I'm worried about,” Ken’s lips pulled into a tight line. “History has not done well with making children into killers.”

“These children played their part in it long before we came back to Beacon Hills. I buried the jar deep within the roots of the Nemeton…” Noshiko shook her head. “It was their sacrifice that brought its power back...They let the demon out of its cage..”

“Scott’s on his way with Kira,” Allison relayed the information from the text message she’d received to the rest of the group as they climbed the stairs to Derek’s loft. “Noshiko wouldn’t help - the Oni are still coming.”

“Well, then let’s just hope our plan works,” Sheriff Stilinski sighed heavily, reaching for the handle of the sliding entry door.

“Good luck,” Chris nodded to the man, and the rest of them stepped back and out of view as the Sheriff opened the door and walked through.

As he stepped inside the swiftly darkening space, he caught sight of both Stiles and Zaida standing before the far wall of windows with their backs facing him. Simultaneously, in unison, the two slowly turned to look over their shoulders and stare at him. The way they moved in sync was unsettling, sending a wave of chills up Noah’s spine.

“Hi, Dad…” Stiles greeted him in a low voice, and something within Noah’s heart told him that the figure he was looking at was not his son.

[pjsk-writin]

Heyy, could you write for Haruka, Emu, and Rui with a reader who's a bit sadistic? Not in a sexual/suggestive way, I just can't think of another word. They just like messing with people and teasing them.

omgs ok, im just gonna say they mess with ppl a lot or smth...hope you like this!! <3

♡ TEASING - Haruka Kiritani, Emu Otori and Rui Kamishiro x Reader

Haruka:

Haruka isn't the biggest fan of messing with people, she always thinks that she could use that time for better, more efficient things.

She doesn't judge you for what you do, but she is very bewildered by it. You take a lot of joy in messing with people and she just doesn't understand how

She prefers to watch you mess with and tease people, because there's no way in hell that you're dragging her into your antics. She loves you, but she's not doing that anytime soon-

However, when you decide to mess with her? She's at a loss for what to do

Should she be irritated?? Should she be flustered?? She has no clue, but she knows that she could never be truly mad at you when you laugh like that.

As long as you don't mess up anything related to her idol life or her penguins, she takes it very light-heartedly, laughing and shoving you away with a huff. You trickster you...

Overall, she loves you, but please keep her out of your antics-

Emu:

Emu doesn't try to mess with people, but with all of her ideas, she's bound to mess with people anyway. Just ask Nene or Tsukasa-

As long as your teasing doesn't make anyone cry, she's perfectly fine with it! If you can put a smile on someone's face because you're messing around with them, then she'll think it's the greatest thing ever!

If she catches wind of something you want to do to someone, she will either ask to join or tell you to change it. If she asks to join you, you can expect it to get chaotic really quickly- The only reason she'd tell you to change it is if she feels it's too mean

However, I hope you're prepared for the war that would come if you start messing with her-

Once she realizes you're teasing/messing around with her, she immediately starts planning ways to get back at you. Her ways are very out of the ordinary, so be cautious-

One of her favorite things to do is misplace your items everywhere. If you can't find any of your belongings, you'll probably also hear her faint giggling from somewhere-

You two are a force to be reckoned with, and while she loves messing with you, she doesn't do as well with teasing- She can't bring herself to say anything mean to you, even as a joke-

Rui:

Rui will learn about your little hobby and go "Finally, a worthy opponent!"

You can't tell me that this man doesn't love to mess with and tease people. He practically thrives off of it, his signature grin on his face anytime he manages to get someone all riled up

So yes, he will make you bring him with you whenever you go out to terrorize mess with people. It gets to the point where people start running whenever they see you both grinning, everyone's aware of what you two are probably going to do-

However, I feel like you two equally mess with each other. It's a war that nobody will win-

He knows all of your tells for when you're about to mess with him, and is just as quick to form a counterattack. You both have your strategies, after all.

Whether it's messing with the other's belongings or teasing them over events that happened a long time ago, you two don't stop until the other is riled up

His poor troupemates have to deal with the two of you messing around with each other, and they dread the day where either of you will drag them into your antics-

[hcrexcellency]

@classiqcals ( joanna & reuben )

Love was a plague. In the earlier days of her youth, Joanna would curse the stars for whatever punishment it wished to bestow on her for being so unlucky in love. Only now, they laughed back at her for giving her heart into the hands of a liar, not a bit of everything that happened between them standing in any form of truth so he could, instead, get her money... or was it that he lying to someone else...? The mental game of catch between both possibilities made her dizzy, but she trusted him. Why would he betray her unless he lied to his most beloved sister? Even if that were true, would it make up for the humiliating feeling of looking like a love sick fool who had fallen right into the trap of a trickster? Have patience was Reuben's plea to her, two words she would not forget as they were not the three she'd hoped to hear. But she tried, nonetheless, to have patience, taking but a few days to be alone with her thoughts and stop herself from jumping to any conclusions based on whatever Isolde, Blair, or Valentina might say to her. Instead, she let the woods talk to her, astride her horse as the shades of green faded together the faster she went, creating a void only she could live in. What would she even say to him? Would she resort back to the cordial, elegant princess who was polite and rigid so that he would no longer have to play this game of pretend beside her? A petty and bitter choice to make. Or would she run right into his embrace in tears as though it had never occurred? Perhaps the easiest way out, but what of her dignity then? If she were not bolting so fast upon her horse, she would have seen the upcoming sharp turn, but alas, as the horse came to such a screeching halt, the momentum gradually pulled Joanna off the horse and onto the ground with a thud. No broken bones, thankfully, but as she bathed in her chambers, her ladies maids regarded a rather large bruise on her left shoulder blade. The bruise would be easily concealed as she dressed in her nightgown and robe. Though, as she sat in front of her mirror, she pulled the gown down to get a better look at it herself, a searing pain that would surely melt away soon enough. The door to her chambers open and she remained still, her back to the door. Through the mirror she'd expected to see her sister, but instead she'd seen the look of her betrothed. Immediately wrathful gaze fell upon her ladies maids, whom apparently could not keep their mouths shut. This was not a conversation she was prepared for just yet, but perhaps the spontaneity of it may cause her to stop thinking for a while, which was what got her in trouble in the first place. "Do not fret," she said quietly, refusing to turn around, unsure if she says it to bring down the pretend persona that Dorit claimed he wore so well, or to quell the worry of the man who truly adored her, "I am fine... I simply fell off my horse. It hurts a bit, but it should mend itself in no time..."

[makerkenzie]

WHAT IF Robb Stark heeded good advice? Part 3

I'm back, lions and leopards. Your baby-eating deviant Lannistan is back, continuing the alternate timeline of "the North wins the war in this one." See Part 1: Things to do differently, and Part 2: How is that working out?

Where we left off: King Robb has a dawning realization that Lord Tywin isn't really fighting him on the battlefield. Everyone knows Stannis Baratheon is on his way to besiege King's Landing, and Robb understands King Stannis wouldn't be any more amenable to an independent North than the current Lannister regime is now. No matter who wins the battle, the Freys will probably turn cloak, and Robb can't afford that. He needs to have a productive discussion of terms before the siege, and the best candidate for that discussion is Acting King's Hand Tyrion.

King Robb's entourage will include:

His mother, Catelyn, who's proven an astute advisor, and has recent up-close experience with Tyrion.

Uncle Edmure, soon to become Lord of Riverrun.

Ser Stevron Frey is still alive in this one because they didn't attack Oxcross, so he didn't take a wound. He's the heir to the Crossing.

Lord Greatjon Umber, lord of Last Hearth and King Robb's fiercest supporter.

Ser Wylis Manderly, heir to New Castle.

Lady Maege Mormont of Bear Island.

Theon Greyjoy, heir to Pyke.

Their hostage Ser Jaime Lannister, the shiny thing to dangle in Tyrion's face.

Lady Brienne of Tarth, Lady Catelyn's sworn sword there to keep Ser Jaime in line.

There are probably some other people I should include in the team. I think it's definitely in King Robb's interest to bring this bunch, at least.

Team shows up at the Red Keep! If I were Robb, I'd give Ser Jaime several good meals along the trip and a bath, shave and clean clothes just before they let Tyrion see him.

Now this doesn't mean they're releasing Jaime into his brother's custody effective immediately. It means a prisoner exchange is on the table. They've brought him this far as a gesture of good faith.

...and in the spirit of good faith, Robb and Catelyn would like to see Sansa and Arya.

So Tyrion's all like, yes, of course. Here's Sansa! See, she's fine, we're taking good care of her!

Yes, good, and, what about Arya?

And Tyrion starts making shit up about Arya being such a trickster, always playing hide-and-seek, and this one time she didn't turn up for supper and it took the septa SEVEN HOURS to find her...

Cue the record scratch, freeze frame on Tyrion: "You must be wondering how I got here."

In all seriousness, the Starks' first suspicion is that Arya's dead and the Lannisters know it. Shit's about to get real, and Sansa starts making noises because she doesn't want to see her mom, big brother, and uncle get slaughtered or locked in cells. At some point Brienne gets in the middle of the fray and shockwaves everyone out to the edges.

Long story somewhat shorter: Tyrion insists they WANT to give Arya back to her family and they have people on the case of FINDING HER, and there's no reason to think she's dead. Sansa corroborates enough to tell the Starks it's still possible for Arya to turn up alive and the Lannisters aren't hiding her.

Back to the war camp outside the city walls. They let Tyrion sweat for a few days while Robb argues about terms and tactics with his team. Ultimately! Catelyn convinces her son that they still need to conclude the war sooner rather than later. Back to the Red Keep!

THIS TIME, as they know the Lannisters only have one of the girls to trade for Jaime, the Starks are in a stronger position.

From Tyrion's position: He's not convinced that Northern independence is even tenable, much less if they take the Riverlands with them. He's even less convinced there's any version of splitting the kingdom that his father would honor in the long term. He sees his assignment as getting Jaime safely home, and convincing the Starks to bend the knee, in that order.

With Team Stark at the table, Tyrion's questions are:

The Wall. Robb says yes, of course, it'll be the North's responsibility to maintain the Night's Watch. If men from the southern provinces want to volunteer for the Watch, they're granted safe passage through the North, but the Iron Throne is under no obligation. If the Wall is inadequately guarded and maintained, the North will bear the brunt of wildling raids.

Right, about that? Tyrion visited the Wall and hung out with men of the Watch and he'd like to know: what happens if the danger beyond the Wall is something much worse than a bunch of ragged people they don't like? How does the southern kingdom trust the North to protect everyone from a Snow Zombie invasion?

Robb's handwaving away that concern, but Tyrion has his reservations. He puts that one aside and moves on to:

The freaking Riverlands, I tell you. That's a problem. They want to take the center out of the kingdom? How are the other regions supposed to accept that?

Well, his daddy should've thought about that---

Yes, yes, his father ravaged the center of the kingdom, and it was easy. Of course once an agreement is reached, they'll withdraw their army from the Trident, yes. And how does the North intend to protect the Riverlands from invasion by other regional armies? It's either an independent kingdom, or not. That's the part where Ser Stevron and Uncle Edmure start asking to speak to King Robb in the next room.

After a tense discussion away from Tyrion, Robb comes back and assures him they'll have no problem with civilian travel through the Riverlands and of course they'll be responsible for protection. Edmure and Stevron still seem nervous but Tyrion is ready to move on.

If the new kingdom has a poor harvest and abrupt winter, they realize they can't ask the Iron Throne for food aid? They can buy food shipments from the Reach, sure, but if they can't pay for it, then they'll just have to suffer the famine. Which brings us back to the Wall.

If the Iron Throne gets word of a non-human threat coming from beyond the Wall, and the North has failed to support the Night's Watch enough to contain the threat, that's a problem for the entire continent. Again, Robb insists the Snow Zombies are long gone.

So Tyrion asks: But what if they're not long gone? If the Snow Zombies come back, and the North has failed to maintain the Wall, whether from hardship or disinclination, then the entire continent is in danger, and how does the North expect the southern kingdom to respond? The point is that if the North fails to protect the continent from supernatural threats, then its independence is null and void and the IT will re-annex the entire goddamn territory. Robb says okay, that's fine, because he is entirely sure the Snow Zombies aren't coming.

What about the Iron Islands? Are they part of the new independent Northern kingdom? No, they'll be another independent kingdom on their own. Oh really? So if the isles raid the North/Riverlands, they're prepared to deal with the attacks and not seek the Iron Throne's aid? Theon insists his dad won't do that. To which Tyrion feels like:

BUT SERIOUSLY, these terms aren't only applicable to the near future. When the current players' grandchildren are ruling their kingdoms, and the isles go raiding the Northern kingdom, then...?

13. So that's when Maege Mormont pulls Robb aside and there's another discussion behind the nearest closed door. They come back in looking moderately twitchy. Robb assures Tyrion he and his vassals will arrange their own safeguards against attacks from the isles.

14. Speaking of which! About the Ironborn currently attacking the west? They'll need to withdraw before the North gets any sort of agreement from the Lannisters. And if they want their own independence, they'll need to send a delegation down to KL to negotiate their own terms. Theon says yeah, okay, they'll do that. Tyrion says furthermore, if the isles go on attacking any of the southern provinces, and the North enables them in any way...the North's independence is null and void. Robb agrees, of course they will not enable the isles to raid the mainland. Tyrion continues that it goes without saying (but he's saying it anyway) that if the North/Riverlands attacks the southern kingdom, they will be re-annexed with extreme prejudice. Robb assures him they don't want any more war.

15. By this point, Tyrion's thinking he can actually get on board with splitting the kingdom. It's probably not sustainable past five years into the coming winter, but he's prepared to let them try it. There's still the matter of how much longer he'll be Acting King's Hand. He says to Robb, a treaty won't do them any good if his father rips it up. There's also the risk of Stannis taking over, and if he does, there's no way of knowing if he'll honor the treaty. (Catelyn knows.) The only assurance Tyrion can offer in that area is that if Stannis wins, and he doesn't honor the treaty, then the Starks don't have to pay tribute to the Iron Throne. Yes, they will be expected to make payments, which Tyrion is willing to divide into easily manageable amounts by spreading them over the next 200 years or so. Consider it 1) clean-up fee for their allies attacking the Westerlands, 2) restitution for forcing the Lannisters to divide their army whilst dealing with Stannis, and 3) insurance against Wall collapse. Fair or not, there's no way Tywin will honor the treaty if it doesn't include some sort of recompense. Even there, Tyrion offers an alternative: the Starks summon their army to KL to ally with the Lannisters against Stannis. Catelyn pulls her son aside and tells him: just make the payments. Their family can renegotiate the amounts with the next king or Hand.

16. With that much agreed, here's the procedure. First, the Starks exchange Tyrion's brother for Robb's sister before they leave the city, or there's no treaty. Second, they contact their allies in the west and demand immediate withdrawal. The treaty isn't valid until the invaders are gone. Finally, Tyrion promises to keep his agents searching for Arya, and if she turns up alive, they'll escort her back to Winterfell. HOWEVER: if Tywin honors the treaty, Cersei is likely to demand a hostage, and her demand will be supplied. So, the Starks need to prepare to say goodbye to another family member.

17. There are more prisoners of war on both sides. They'll stay where they are until after the battle. If Stannis wins...then, that'll be one of the less dangerous discussions the Starks will have with him.

18. The prisoner exchange is a joyous event. Sansa can't stop hugging her fam. Tyrion sticks Jaime in a tower cell in Maegor's Holdfast until he promises to hide in the secret tunnels during the battle. To their shock and horror, Cersei agrees with Tyrion that Jaime should sit out the battle after his months of being chained to a wall in Riverrun. Jaime promises to stay out of the fighting, just to make his siblings happy. And then when the battle begins, he disguises himself like a common man-at-arms and he goes out and fights. His presence on the field prevents Ser Mandon Moore from making his murder attempt on Tyrion. WHICH MEANS, Tyrion doesn't take any serious injuries during the battle, he isn't bedridden for days afterward, and his daddy can't railroad him out of the discussion following their victory. Things are getting twitchy between Jaime and Cersei.

19. The Starks send ravens to their allies in the west, followed by messengers in case the ravens don't make it, instructing withdrawal from the territory. Rickard Karstark doesn't like the news, as he still insists on killing Ser Jaime. Robb starts by reminding him of his surviving son Harrion, prisoner of the Lannister army, and follows by promising execution for insubordination. The Ironborn withdraw from the west, just in time for the Starks to get the heck out of Dodge before Stannis sails into Blackwater Bay. They ride back up to Riverrun and hold their breath for a resolution.

20. Tywin isn't exactly "happy" about the independence treaty, but he honors it because the war has already cost them huge amounts of gold, grain harvest, and lives. Tribute payments are welcome news. Cersei demands a hostage from the Starks, as promised. The Starks pause at the Twins on the way back to Winterfell so Robb can marry some giddy young she-weasel as they'd previously agreed. Nobody's head gets sewn onto a direwolf. Harrion Karstark goes home with his dad and Gawen Westerling goes home to the Crag.

21. The Starks roll up to Winterfell with Robb's new bride beside him and Brienne still serving Catelyn. Nobody's invaded or burned the castle. Theon is still their hostage and has all his appendages fully attached. There's the joyous reunion with Bran and Rickon, though Arya's absence is still heavy in the air. It's even more bittersweet when the raven arrives with Cersei's demand of a hostage. They're trying to convince Cersei to accept a sibling of the she-weasel, and Cersei is not having it. She demands one of Robb's family of birth, or she will claim his firstborn child. Just as the family are almost ready to accept they'll have to send Rickon to the Red Keep, Sandor Clegane rides up to the castle gates with Arya. There's another joyful reunion, and after rolling around in a pile of hugs and kisses with her children, Catelyn makes a decision: she will be the hostage. Brienne accompanies her to the Red Keep, where Cat releases her from service. Cersei is satisfied.

Now winter is coming and the North has its independence. It'll stay that way as long as they can keep the Riverlands secure. And as long as Balon Greyjoy behaves himself. And they have enough grain and salt beef to keep their people fed through the winter. And as long as the Wall doesn't crack. Sure, they've got it from there.

[no-more-tales-tavern]

The Never-ending Cycle

The Legend of Zelda D&D AU Muse Masterlist

Princess Zelda Aasimar Divine Soul Sorcerer (Breath of the Wild/Tears of the Kingdom) Born the latest in a long line of chosen vessels for the goddess Hylia, Zelda knew well the terrible Calamity that would soon come, but piety was not something she yet understood. Calling on a goddess for strength was a strange concept, and it nearly cost her everything when she failed to call upon the power that was all her own.

Aasimar Light Domain Cleric (Skyward Sword) Hailing from the far distant past and only spoken of in legend, Zelda would've preferred to live her life in the clouds, teasing her childhood friend and enjoying the peace—but clearly, fate had other plans. Her duty as the reincarnation of the goddess Hylia required she travel to the surface world and seal away her ancient enemy once and for all.

Hylian Twilight Cleric (Twilight Princess) With the fate of her kingdom being threatened by invaders from another dimension, Queen Zelda had no choice but to submit. She let the villains claim her castle and kingdom for the safety of her people, and with the hope that her own plan to change the course of the fight would come to fruition. If only they could find the chosen hero...

Link Hylian Fighter/Ranger (Breath of the Wild/Tears of the Kingdom) Though his memories of his past life from one-hundred years ago are still fuzzy, Link knows exactly who he is. A skilled warrior and swordsman, a survivalist through and through, and the devoted companion of the Princess Zelda. Nothing—not even the endless stretch of time—will keep him from standing by her side.

Hylian Champion Fighter (Skyward Sword) All that Link wanted in his life was to soar through the heavens and spend his days with the girl of his dreams. Instead, he found himself plummeting to the surface world below Skyloft, a talking sword slung over his back, and with a die-hard determination in his mind to find his best friend and bring her back home at any cost.

Hylian Order of Lycan Blood Hunter (Twilight Princess) The twisted nature of the Twilight Realm certainly had an odd effect to the simple ranch hand from Ordon. Now cursed—or blessed depending on your perspective—with the ability to shift into a feral canine beast, his journey to set right his hometown and save the children who looked up to him has taken a turn for the darker.

Ganondorf Gerudo Barbarian/Sorcerer (Tears of the Kingdom) Long ago, during the age of the Zonai, Ganondorf led the Gerudo during a time of much hardship. He turned to Zonai for their incredible power and advanced technology...and when they failed to aid, he decided he would claim that power for himself and his people. The war that followed would be one to change him forever into the dreaded Demon King.

Gerudo Fighter/Warlock (Twilight Princess) Driven by an ambition to conquer Hyrule for his people, the Gerudo Chief Ganondorf made a pact with a member of the strange Twili, aiding him in usurping the throne of his realm in exchange for the forces and powers to then attack Hyrule Castle and claim that throne for himself.

Impa Sheikah Shadow Monk (Age of Calamity) The first protector of the princess Zelda, Impa is her most trusted companion, and most confident friend before Link arrived. Despite her silent and stoic nature, she has a kind heart, and trusts in her friend to do what is right, even if it goes against what her father believes is best.

Purah Sheikah Armorer Artificer (Tears of the Kingdom) Restored to her youthful vitality once again, the brilliant and incredibly gorgeous Professor Purah has dedicated herself to the reestablishing and progressing of Post-Calamity Hyrule. Her mastery of the Ancient Sheikah technology has gifted her a talent in creating her own devices which barrel Hyrule towards industrial revolution.

Midna Twili Arcane Trickster (Twilight Princess) Hailing from the strange and twisted Twilight Realm, Midna is the true and proper queen of the Twili, removed from her throne by a horrible usurper. Her ambition is to reclaim her throne at any cost, seeking out the Fused Shadow to create the weapon capable of reclaiming her power and destroying the one who took it from her.

Mipha Zora Life Domain Cleric (Breath of the Wild) Meek and humble, Mipha was the chosen champion for the Zora during the time of the Calamity. Though clearly skilled and talented in her own right, Mipha struggled with her own insecurities of her youth and held a lack of confidence in her own purpose.

Sidon Zora Open Sea Paladin (Tears of the Kingdom) Bold and outgoing, Sidon is a beacon of inspiration and optimism in the bleak world of Hyrule Post-Calamity. His bravery and charm lifts the spirits of those in the Zora Domain, and he leads his people with great zeal and enthusiasm to see his land made good and safe again.

Revali Rito Fighter/Rogue (Breath of the Wild) Young and brash, the expert marksman has a bit of a chip on his shoulder about playing second-fiddle to the chosen champion and wielder of the Master Sword. Revali's cockiness is not unearned, but he should be careful—perhaps it will spell his doom soon enough.

Teba Rito Ranger/Rogue (Breath of the Wild) Cool and level-headed, Teba is an even-tempered member of the Rito warriors, and a skilled marksman as well. He was vital in defeating the Malice-infused Vah Medoh over Rito Village, but now he spends his days trekking the cool Hebra mountains, doing his best to keep the region safe and secure.

Daruk Goron Totem Warrior Barbarian (Breath of the Wild) Daruk is the bold and powerful leader of the Goron, and served them well during the Calamity. He served as a sure and steady rock in that time, refusing to back down from any challenge, and standing tall to defend his friends when the time to fight arose.

Urbosa Gerudo Storm Herald Barbarian (Breath of the Wild) Once the chief of the Gerudo, Urbosa was a wise and kind leader, who led her people with power and authority. A friend to Zelda's mother, she is close with the princess, and much of her time before the Calamity was spent worrying over her.

Riju Gerudo Barbarian/Rogue (Tears of the Kingdom) Though somewhat insecure with her own right to lead her people, Riju is every bit the wise and kind leader that her grandmother was, and just as skilled a warrior. Despite the cool and aloof facade she puts on with her people, she is still a child at heart.

Mineru Zonai Battle Smith Artificer (Tears of the Kingdom) Cool and aloof, and not a facade, the slender Zonai scientist is interested in all kinds of knowledge—whether they be ancient myths, or the specific structural anatomy of a robot from a far-flung era. Her studies are deep and intense and leave her laboratory dimly glowing well into the night.

King Rauru Zonai Light Domain Cleric (Tears of the Kingdom) Once the proud and kind ruler of Hyrule in the distant past, Raura was gifted with incredible power and master of light itself. He stood as a beacon of goodness and right for those who lived in Hyrule, and despite his own humility, many in his time revered him as a god.

Queen Sonia Hylian Order Domain Cleric (Tears of the Kingdom) Sweet and kind would be the words to describe Sonia, the first of Hyrule's queens. A gentle soul who would never harm another, she always sought peace, and did her best to lead her people by her example. When war arose, though, she found herself outmatched...

Twinrova Gerudo Genie Warlock (Ocarina of Time) Born from the fused Twinrova witches, Twinrova is a powerful Gerudo witch bound in service to her master and king, Ganon. Dark and sadistic, her mastery of fire and ice spells are unrivaled, and she stands against any who would seek to lay low her king. It is unclear if the transformation is temporary, or if Twinrova is truly her own self.

[sixfootart]

King Chickens, a thrall folk story

Sijana is a beloved trickster character in South Front stories. In this one she deals with the generic Captain, a character who rarely has any other name or much of a brain. Translation from Corps Savic.

For some time, Sijana was a servant to Captain, and did all type of chores for him. 

Once, the company captured a small town that was recently full of Briari people (in those old days those kind of towns were as thick as fleas on a dog). As soon as Captain saw there was lots of food in the town, he called Sijana. 

“Get the biggest chickens in town,” he said, “my officers will have a feast tonight.”

Ever dutiful, Sijana went to find the biggest chickens. After some stomping around in a muddy chicken coop she found two large hens. Carefully she plucked them and gut them, and ate the feet and entrails.

When she showed them to Captain, though, he took one long look at the birds and then waved them away. “Pathetic. In Savos they come ten times bigger.”

Sijana just nodded and promised to bring new ones, as one does. When she came outside she gave the chickens to the crowd of field babies. “I guess these might fill little thralls, but apparently not big humans. Find me bigger and you can have these.”

The kids were ecstatic at this game and ran off, screaming. In time, they brought her two even more massive hens, with bright red combs and shiny feathers. These she didn’t waste her time plucking, having learned her lesson, and brought them inside.

“Pathetic,” said Captain. “My officers are already plotting to take my place, and you’ll have them think I can’t even feed them.”

Twice more Sijana sent the field babies, while she napped in the long grass behind the house. They came back with more hens, which Captain quickly rejected, and then the two biggest, oldest roosters in town.

“Don’t you know what a chicken is?” asked Captain. “Find some good chickens or you’ll be sorry.”

This time Sijana did go to look for herself, because it’s hard to nap when you’re angry. She walked past all the chicken coops in town, until she heard something; the honk of geese. Following the sound she went and found them, all huddled in the corner of an old barn. Except when she got closer she realised the honk was more of a wheeze, because the geese were very old and very forest-sick. Their old paddle shaped feet had grown lumps, and their eyes were laced shut with feeler tentacles and mucus.

“If you pretend to be chickens, I’ll give you some mercy,” Sijana said to them. The geese were angry at this idea and hissed at her.

Quickly Sijana killed the two biggest geese. Even sick, they fought her, and they were as big as five chickens. After they got some bloody pecks on her she killed them, all the while cursing them. Then carefully she cut off their geese heads and geese feet, and plucked out all the feathers. Under the feathers were some bad lumps and sores, so, thinking quickly, Sijana rubbed their whole body with red taber leaf. Then the goose’s skin was red, and you couldn’t see the sores.

She took the geese to Captain.

“Finally!” said Captain. “These will do. But why are they red?”

“Oh these are King Chickens,” said Sijana. “You were right to send me again, sir. These are a legendary type of chicken in Briar land and I only just found them. Their meat makes men stronger and more virile.”

“Fantastic,” said Captain, not wanting to seem more ignorant than a thrall. “I’ve always wanted to try King Chicken.”

So Sijana roast the two sick geese on spits over a hearth, until the meat was crackling and made her hungry even though she’d seen the pustules. Then she put them on the table of the captured farm house for the officers.

All the men immediately shoveled ‘King Chicken’ into their mouths, laughing and talking with each other. Soon though, some of them made disgusted faces, and looked like they wanted to spit it out.

“Is there something different about the chicken?” One finally had the courage to ask.

“It’s King Chicken,” said Captain. “Maybe you wouldn’t know the taste, if you haven’t been fortunate enough. I had my thrall find them for us. It’s a legendary delicacy in Briar country.”

“Oh,” said the young officer, “that’s why it’s so good. I’ve always wanted to try King Chicken.”

And so it went. By the end of the night the two huge geese were gone.

For the next two weeks, all the thralls had a great leisurely time in the nice little town, because all the human officers couldn’t walk two steps away from a latrine. One even died, and Sijana had a hard time stopping herself from laughing when Captain announced that.

 Perhaps they would have recovered faster, except now they wanted King Chicken broth to help them heal. Until the sick geese ran out they would eat nothing else.