#they might be adults but they are human too

[zorilleerrant]

"You consider me your priestess?" the girl - the old woman, now, but you can still see her rosy cheeks the first time she came to visit you - asks you. It's hard to determine her tone of voice. She doesn't sound offended, at least, although she also doesn't sound like she believes you're a god. That, at least, is expected.

You wave your hand vaguely. You didn't get the gesture quite right, but humans always change their body language, and it's been too long since you needed to be human for anything. "It's not that you are. But you're the closest I've had in generations, and I would mark you one, if you want me to." You sit, casually, on a bench that wasn't there a moment before, hoping she'll do the same.

The old woman eyes it suspiciously. She's been here for every birthday since she found the place, and many informal days besides, and she knows there was never a bench here. Still, with a weary sigh, she sits beside you. "I'd like that, I think. I never had the test scores to join any of the big priesthoods. Get one over on them, a little bit." She laughs, and her teen years, writing scathing takedowns of theological papers, come back into view for a moment.

You touch her hand. There's a spark of magic. You don't need to, you never used to, but humans are more skeptical these days, and even your most devoted follower doesn't remember the old ways.

For a moment fleeting even by her standards, you wonder if she might have brought them back. But the fishing town isn't what it once was, and no one much makes the hike up here anymore, save curious children and nostalgic adults.

"Do you want me to do anything?" your priestess asks you, a wry smiling wrinkling the still plump curve of her cheeks. "Carry a sign, maybe? Rush into the town and curse their names for not giving you your due respect? I can do a mean scolding these days."

You laugh, hand still resting over hers. "If you like." The idea of her running among the fishmongers, giving over amulets with every sale, making rude gestures when they're refused, is incomparable. The only thing she really needs is The Book, though. You fold open your altar, the way she's done so many times, and bring out the box she admired enough to start polishing gently when she came to visit, telling you about her travels and her art.

"Oh, you again," your priestess says, in delight, laying a delicate hand on the smooth wood. "I learned woodworking and inlay because of you, you little scamp." When she draws her fingers down the sides, this time, the box opens, with a click she can barely hear. Her ears aren't what they once were. Her gasp is the same as it ever was, though, and she taps The Book reverently.

"I never had many rules, even back in the beginning," you tell her, opening the cover so she knows it's safe. "What ones I had don't matter so much, I think - although I'd ask you to be careful where you summon storms, if you try it." You don't know if she has the power for that, anymore. She delved deep into magic in her mid-life crisis, but you've rarely seen her use it since, and you don't know if hers has waned or blossomed in her twilight years.

She looks over the spells. She can read the annotations, still, at least. "It's a lot of power for one person." She flexes her fingers, summoning wisps of what might be the core of some major working, if she concentrated a little harder. "Would you mind if I taught these to people? Not to join your priesthood, mind, just so there could be a little more magic in the world."

You pause. You should have considered that. Many of your siblings have left their words and their magics to the world as their respect faded away, and even more have begun recovery as lost arts. You didn't know your priestess was a teacher. You knew she'd taught a few times, when the calling struck her, but never that she felt the need in her heart. "Of course," you say. The spells are mostly weak now, you think. The time for hiding them is long past. If there's something in there that can help, so be it.

She grins at you. Her teeth are still hardy, and the candlelight flashes pleasingly against them. "Of course you'd mind, or of course you wouldn't? Don't give me any loopholes, now, Your Divinity," she laughs at her own joke, the way she started doing when she broke free of childish attempts at maturity, but still, she waits for your answer, taking your hand in hers again.

"Share them however you'd like," you tell her, knowing that it means she'll record it down to scans and recreations, "the knowledge within is yours." It's clear she'll get years of delight out of it. You don't know how much she might change the world of the handful of enthusiasts she chooses to work with her. It's a nice bookend for a life full of adventure, you think, a discovery like that.

She kisses the book, gently, on the gilded cover. Then, almost as an afterthought, she kisses your cheek as well. "Thank you," she says. Then she opens it again, absorbed in the pages, well past when the evening grows dark. You keep the candles burning higher for her, so she never has to stop her perusal. It's soothing, to watch a priestess once again hard at work. She looks up. "Is this the gift?"

"What?" you ask, caught off guard. Even through all your disciples, you never managed to learn which times connect to each other in the mind of a human. You'd thought that question long forgotten, and hadn't planned on answering right now.

"The gift you said you wanted to give me. Is The Book the gift?" she asks, in confusion. Books are wonderful, powerful things, of course, but they aren't secret. Hidden, often, and protected, and sometimes held to only the most intimate of worshipers, but they're nothing unexpected, not for a deity to give.

You lean back on the bench you never rose from, and wonder if you should bring in desks for those she plans to teach. "No. I was going to offer you your choice of afterlife, when the time comes." You watch her as she frowns. You wonder if she already has an answer in mind. You wonder if she knew since she was knee high with a scraped arm, or since she was a teenager bent on escaping her classmates, or since she was learning to grow and just choosing her passion. She just looks at you, not answering.

Then, weary minutes later - weary for her, where each night brings aches the day didn't; you're happy to wait - she asks, almost rudely, "not soon, I hope?" Her chin juts out as it used to.

"Not so soon for you," you say, thoughtfully, "although too soon for me, I must admit."

She nods, still cradling The Book carefully. "I thought, once you'd made me your priestess, I'd end up going where all your servants go," she says, sounding, of all thing, patient about it. You don't know how much she knows about your afterlife. You've never discussed it with her. Even when you were popular, once, that was never much of the details that caught people's eye.

"Normally only monks go there," you say, not that you'd discourage her, if she wanted to stay always by your side. "It's a place for quiet contemplation, mostly. Even of my priesthood, only the ones who valued their silence ever stayed." You can see her, in a long gown, roaming the halls in a circle, thinking. You can't see her enjoying it for more than a short time.

"You'd have to send me away," she says, ruefully. Then she pauses to think. "You won't pick for me? I can pick?"

Still, you think, she might have you picking her home, anyway. So many of yours did. Even the ones who earned the highest honors left everything in your hands, and here she is a priestess of moments only, ready to upset everything. Or nothing, if you ask her not to. You close her hands around The Book again.

"Think on it," you say, and wait for next year.

While other god's shrines are magnificent, yours is a bit too humbling. And yet a little girl visits you every year after stumbling upon it, never missing a year even as she grows old. Deeply moved, you decide to give her a parting gift greater than what any other God would dare to give.

[honeyryewhiskey]

She moves through the shadows in a triplicate form, reigning over sorcery, crossroads, and necromancy. An enigmatic force, she is the pulsing heart of the dark, perched perfectly in the balance of good and evil.

As the Winchesters scour myths and lore for answers, they find themselves delving deeper into the labyrinth of her power—a maze that shifts with every step.

Now, with her aloof little familiar bound to Dean’s soul, the brothers are trapped in a game of Hecate's making. Breaking the bond demands a sacrifice neither of them is willing to give—but the bigger challenge might just be surviving the sharp-tongued, frustratingly useful familiar who seems determined to push Dean’s every button.

FALL INTO THE CHAOS

PROLOGUE i. THE THREE HEADED BEAST

Long, long ago—centuries before the Winchesters ever walked the earth—your world was steeped in herbs, potions, and spells. You and your sisters were the village’s love witches, shadowy figures whispered about in the darkest corners of taverns and prayer circles. The desperate and forlorn came to your family’s door—unhappy wives, weeping girls, and lovesick souls—placing their fragile hopes in your hands and trusting you to grant their desires.

Together, you and your sisters became the answer to countless prayers, weaving love and longing into potions that could soothe the ache of lonely hearts. But it was the work done in shadow—the forbidden craft, the manipulation of desires too dark to confess—that stirred ripples in the fabric of your magic and drew the attention of Hecate herself.

The goddess, rarely concerned with the trifles of her mortal followers, took notice of your bloodline. In you, she saw power unbridled and potential unchecked, a spark capable of burning brighter than any mortal flame. But such power demands a price. And when the time came to pay, a sacrifice was made—a choice you never spoke of again.

Condemned to an eternal servitude, you surrendered everything to become what you are now: a shapeshifting spirit, bound to Hecate’s will. For centuries, you have been her tool and her weapon, drawn from the dark recesses of your tomb whenever you proved useful. She wielded you in secret wars, relied on you for whispered truths, and cast you aside when the work was done.

Time has become a blur of fire and shadow, of fleeting moments stolen before being returned to the cold embrace of eternal sleep. You have watched empires rise and crumble, seen humanity claw its way to triumph only to destroy itself again. The horrors of war, the fragile joys of peace, the endless hunger for power—all have left their marks on you.

But through it all, the ache of what was lost remains, an ember that refuses to fade. Bound by a leash you cannot sever, you have lived through centuries without ever truly shaping them.

And now, after untold years of servitude and silence, you awaken again. But this time, it is not Hecate’s call that stirs you—it is the binding of a mortal soul, tethered to yours in ways you cannot yet fathom. Dean Winchester is no king, no god, but his defiance burns brighter than any ruler’s crown. As frustrating as he is, he offers something you’ve long forgotten how to hope for: the chance to carve your own destiny.

j's note 𖤐 no use of y/n, will be using nicknames but keeping physical descriptions to an absolute minimum, aside from what could be applied to a fem!reader.

series warnings!! hunting-esque violence, strong language, canon divergent?, adult themes — 18+, nothing non-consensual will happen, just not my cup of tea. but. reader is bound to dean, souls intertwining and whatnot. makes that relationship a bit taboo in nature. still learning tags, bare with me ppl

[ disclaimer ! this is based on different Hecate myths, but i took a hop, skip and a jump of creative liberty to make it fit into the spn universe and this fic. so. this is not entirely accurate to greek mythology ] 

[theallianceofcelestials]

A big what if scenario for SEA!AU ; but how would KC and the rest of the family react to Eclipse somehow getting turned into a child / baby for a few hours / days?

You just opened a can of worms friend. I'll just use a similar format as to what I used with the WN and SEA characters meeting.

More under, because this is a bit long, and I should have done this last time too

The only way he can turn into a kid is obviously with some SCP shenanigans, though I'll admit I haven't done my research and don't know if there's any SCPs able to turn people into children (though with how many of them exist, I wouldn't be surprised) But even if there is one, he's an animatronic so it'd probably work differently.

Let's just say there're 2 scenarios, one where it's just a childified body his adult self is in, and one where he's both child sized and acts like one too with no memories of his adult life.

In the first scenarion he'd be very annoyed and angry. He's also try hiding probably once he realises the "danger" he's in. He does not want to be a plush toy.

Killcode

First scenario

The moment he sees his grumpy animatronic son in the child body, most likely after having searched the facility for him because he did not come back for dinner and he didn't mention any work related stuff that might take a bit, it'd be over immediately. There'd be no way you can get him off of Eclipse.

He'd always want to cuddle him, keep him close, and maybe tease him lightly over getting turned into a child. It's his right as a father, and if he's shouted at more than not, then he's just going to have to keep his laughter in more.

He'd mostly do this to cover up his worry, because this is his most fragile kid turned even more fragile. Eclipse is not known already in their family as a fighter, more a runner, but with those stubby short legs how is he going to get away from danger? He obviously can't let his kid leave his sight, otherwise he may die. He hopes the Foundation is working on a solution already, because if not there'll be hell to pay.

He'd be unwilling to let his kid out of his sight like this, going into full on helicopter mode. He'd insist Eclipse stay on his shoulder at the very least if he doesn't want cuddles, and he'd be reluctant to give him up even to their family. It's the I'm-the-parent-of-small-child instincts, and they've revived with a vengance he didn't experience even when his kids were young. Probably because his kids were always hardier.

Second scenario

In this scenarion the panicking scientist he was working with would probably call Killcode in, because he's becoming a personnel member anyway, and because they fear if they didn't, and tried to hide this, they'd all be brutally murdered. They're all correct obviously.

The child Eclipse, with no memories of his life, wouldn't know who or what Killcode is, only that he's been told he's his dad. Perhaps his daycare programming would tell him information about these things, so he'd know what a dad is. He'd just light up at the sight of his papa, happily reaching out in what his code knows is normal behaviour for children. It'd actually be kinda funky if he immitated how a human child would act with their parent based on what his programming tells him is normal.

Killcode, obviously, wouldn't know how to react. On one hand, that's his kid, on the other, he finds this whole thing unnatural. Kinda uncanny valley. He'd also be pretty scared his child was deleted and thus basically murdered. It gets proven wrong thankfully when Eclipse starts babbling about stuff only his adult version would know, like how he wants to go back to their room and play with everyone, and can they pleasee have lava cake today? It'd greatly calm KC, who'd go into indulgent dad mode.

He'd still be constantly cuddling, but he'd be much softer. He'd take this as his chance to make up for the time they weren't together, because maybe if they can make nice memories for Eclipse in this young stage of him, his past wouldn't hurt that much.

He'd obviously be overprotective, happiest when he can cuddle this toddler version of his child, and he'd fold to the faded-gold optics whenever they widen and make more sweets than he ever did. He'd be humming sillier songs when he cooks, watching the child toddling around happily, without a clue to the dangers and horrors he's faced.

He'd absolutely melt when Eclipse calls him papa, or when the little one pounces on his legs because his paws are funny, he'd sit on the floor all day sometimes just helping Eclipse build something out of legos, read him bedtime stories, and just fall asleep on the couch while Eclipse is in his lap.

Solar Flare

First scenario

Seeing its big brother so small and adorable looking would make its perpetual expression into the happy little smiling squints it's able to do. They're just so happy to see their big brother like this.

He'd obviously ask Killcode to cuddle his brother plenty of times, but'd make a bunch of drawings of Eclipse sitting grumpily on Killcode's shoulders. The wall would be filled with all of them, and Eclipse can't even be mad at it properly.

Whenever it wants to dance though Eclipse would deny it. He's just unwilling to embarrass himself even more than he already is. Solar Flare would be sad over that, and would want this to be over with soon. He wants to go back to hanging out with its big brother like usual.

Second scenario

The toddler version of its brother would have its heart in a tight-fist clench in seconds, and there's no stopping it. Even if it's a bit confused on who's the big brother anymore. The kid is still trying to fit that older sibling place, but because he's just a toddler it's... a bit questionable.

They'd draw lots together, do silly dances and Eclipse, despite their spikes, would happily climb onto their back and point it in directions to go in. It'd obviously comply, quickly finding amusement in being the horsey once they get over their fear of him stabbing himself on his spikes.

The two of them would also become very 'judgy' about their siblings, playfully poking at them together. Because of the toddler, Solar Flare can get away with playfully bullying its other brothers, who have to grit their teeth so the baby doesn't cry.

Bloodmoon

First scenario

They'd laugh their asses off. No question in that. They'd also be unbearingly overprotective, no question about that either.

They would curl up around Eclipse, despite him hissing and grumbling at them to leave him alone, surrounding him with safety and warmth. It doesn't sit well with them to see him so small, especially when the child body's battery is smaller and he just generally gets more tired easier. But seeing him plug in to charge more would be a torture. But seeing him yawning more would be funny.

They're also barred from dancing with him, which makes them slightly annoyed but they suck it up, mostly able to play Scrabble with him. Which is fun, don't get them wrong, but they're more physically inclined creatures.

The funniness of it would just wear off after some point and leave them with loads of anxiety, because he still wants to do dangerous things, but his body just doesn't allow for that anymore. They'd be freaking out by day two

Second scenario

Blasted SCPs! They're the eldests again!

Bloody would feel terribly shaky with their big brother being a toddler, even more unsure than ever, because now they're adults and Eclipse is soft compared to them. He'd be freaking out. Rusty wouldn't be so obvious, but he too is scared of screwing up.

Eclipse wants to do stuff with them though. He remembers playing Scrabbles with them, but now he finds it boring which'd panic the twins. He also doesn't like horror anymore, crying at the more grusome scenes, so watching movies/playing games they did before is out too. All that's left is dancing too, which they'd be happy to do, watching stuff like Jurassic park where they root for the dinos, and playing tag.

They're a bit rusty (haha) at this whole child appropriate thing, especially because they were kids themselves when their siblings were kids, but they'll try their best.

They play tag with Eclipse, play hide and seek with him too, pretending not to see/hear the little toddler. They'd be absolutely down to play horsey, get into tickle fights and just generally have fun.

They'd jump on top of the shelves near the ceiling of the room, leaving the tot up there, and playfully threatening to keep him there if he doesn't behave. They'd also throw him in the air a lot, and give him playful shakes whenever they're holding him.

They'd feel kind of nostalgic over it, despite never having interacted with children before as an adult.

Lunar

First scenario

He's laighing. Eclipse is struggling with life in general, and he's laughing.

He'd bully him so much about his height its unreal. All the shortie jokes that he has to deal with. He'd be epecially insufferable if he was taller too.

He's consequently be basically ignored by Eclipse thus, who would be a sore loser about this. Because he didn't sign up to be made fun of. (he obviously ignores all the times he calls Lunar a midget, those don't count because he is, while Eclipse is just an unlucky bastart)

Lunar would be busy laughing his ass off to truly realise how uncomfortable he actually feels about this all. He'd sometimes wake up in the night though, wishing to snuggle into a silicone chest, only to remember his big brother is small now. He wouldn't admit how much that bothers him though

Second scenario

He's uncomfortable. Very, very uncomfortable. He doesn't know how to handle not being the youngest anymore. Even if only temporarily.

He'd be the most withdrawn because of it in the beginning, only to feel horrible at the obvious hurt in the toddler's optics. He'd fold before long eventually, but only because he misses his big brother.

He finds he doesn't much mind the kid, maybe even has fun with him, even if they do have to play less or even different games to their usual. They can't exactly play scary games when the tot freaks out over it. So they'd play more stuff like Mario Kart and what not, even if Eclipse's coordination like this is not the best. Lunar has to throw a lot so he doesn't end up with a crying toddler next to him. He wouldn't mind it all that much as he gets into it, happily losing a couple times so the kid can be happy too.

He'd miss his older brother tho. He gets it the others are having fun with the toddlerified Eclipse, but he personally misses the Eclipse who's confident, smart and doesn't freak out over jumpscares. He's kind of sad about him not being there anymore. Even if only temporarily, Lunar doesn't like being an older brother, Feels wrong to him.

Sun

First scenario

He'd be having the time of his life pretending his nephew is an actual child. After Killcode he's the worst offender of cuddles.

He'd just hug Eclipse to himself, ignoring the angry mumbling and escape attempts. He'd however also make sure Eclipse knows he's just messing with him. He doesn't actually want there to be any bad blood between them.

He'd probably keep his cats away from him like this, unsure how they'd react. It's an amusing attempt when all they want is to snuggle to the snuggle-sized Eclipse. They'd absolutely bully him

Second scenario

He'd melt. And he'd go into full uncle mode.

He'd be doing arts'n'crafts constantly with the kid, snatch him playfully off the ground to nuzzle, and make loads of pancakes. He'd also have fun knitting clothes for the child, making a full winter get up with the mittens, oversized scarf and big sweated and cutesy hat.

He'd be careful when introducing him to the cats, making loads of pictures of them snuggling on the couch and bed. He'd be absolutely delighted to have Eclipse toddle after him curiously, and he'd ring his bells for him just to get his attention.

He'd be all into reading stories for him too, making all the silly voices he can. He'd also sew a plushy probably, maybe a little kitty to match the little Eclipse, squealing in delight when he brings it with him to everywhere.

He'd be doing fun bathtime routines too, making extensive bubble baths so the toddler can have all the fun. One night he'd just show up with a bunch of bathtime toys, and no one dares question him.

They'd also make a solar bot club with Solar Flare, and Sun'd teach the toddler Eclipse (whose normal, adult version taught Sun) how to make friendship bracelets, so all the club members match.

He'd probably almost fistfight Killcode too over who gets to snuggle when. He barely holds himself back, because that is still his brother's kid.

Moon

First scenario

After having a good laugh, he'd immediately start looking for a cure. Eclipse appreciates this, and would probably try sticking to him the most despite how he also makes fun of him extensively. In Eclipse's opinion, that's still better than all the coddling. That's just kinda the norm for Moon.

He'd try to act less jerkish though, simply because he's not immune to the size no matter what he tells himself. It's just his touch averse nature keeping him from actually cuddling. He'd probably do more heatpats, which he'd disguise as condescending so Eclipse doesn't realise he finds him adorable too

Second scenario

He'd keep away, afraid he'd fuck up somehow. This obviously wouldn't go down well with the tot, who does remember his uncle Moonie doesn't like tocuhes, but his programming is telling him to at least sometimes give him a hug because that's what you do with uncles. Moon would obviously fold eventually.

He'd allow the occasional hug, but'd still make it pretty clear it's only good if it's allowed touch. Instead of all the physical touches, he'd opt for quality time and gifts.

He'd teach the kid how to build things, proud when the skills he got as an adults kinda shine through. They'd build stuff from all sorts of things, from legos, from building blocks, from jenga and etc. He'd also get one of this for kids mini robots that you have to build yourself and can practice programming on. He'd also let the kid 'make' a video game, which would just be him sitting in Moon's lap and telling him what to do.

He'd also unwillingly go into naptime mode, reading bedtime stories so he falls asleep, singing lullabies when it's just the two of them, and even rocking him occasionally when he feels comfortable with a bit more touch. Because of this Eclipse would go to him whenever he feels tired during the day. He'd then curl up next to Moon, or even in his lap, while his uncle reads him a story and pats him like a kitty.

He'd be especially happy with all the ray skritches Moon can do, sometimes being annoying on puprose so his uncle will shut him up by going for his rays to make him sleep. Moon would be irritated by how he's outsmarted by a toddler each time.

He'd also take it upon himself to make him learn stuff, unwilling to let his knowledge maniac nephew sit idle. Eclipse enjoys these lessons, bringing notebooks he can scribble into. His notes though would be half badly spelled words and half drawings. Moon will never admit he finds it adorable.

After he's back in his normal body in the first scenario he's pretty mad and humiliated, and would be withdrawn and angry for a couple days. Lots of groveling would be needed to make him forgive people.

The second scenario would also end with him embarrassed in the end, but he's feel pretty touched by all the things they did for him. He doesn't want a repeat though

[draculasstrawhat]

While we’ve tenuously made our peace with redemption arcs in fiction, as a society we are really, deeply uncomfortable with the idea that people can change. It’s part of the framing of people who do bad stuff as “inhuman monsters”, but it goes deeper. Not only is someone who does awful things bad, they must always have been bad, and will always be bad.

And it’s not true.

People change. Your mum, your best friend from pre-school, your high school bully, that celebrity you love, they contain the capacity for change, both for the better and the worse.

As do you.

There is no such thing as original sin. No one is predestined to evil, nor to goodness. Sure, some people have a better chance at turning out “okay”, but that is due to no innate virtue.

Our social circumstances, our expectations, our experiences, all shape the person you become, from before you even know where your hands are. Of course, as you grow older, you have choices - and will hopefully make the right ones - but the self is not static. Remaining a certain sort of person in the face of external pressures will be a daily choice (and sometimes a battle.) Especially as various organisations and ideologies deliberately and specifically seek to radicalise people for their own ends, through gradual “reasonable”‘change.

What’s more, outside of fiction, human “arcs” are not contained in to “starts good, gets bad,” or “starts bad, redeems self.” People contain multitudes, and change often comes in phases, or in inconstant ways. I love fiction, but it tidies up messy human complexities, and in doing so, tells us comforting lies.

None of this excuses bad behaviour, or hurting people.

But the tendency to see someone who has done bad as a monster, as someone who has always done wrong (and - if you didn’t spot it - was always cunningly concealing it), and was always predestined to do wrong, spares you the obligation of reflecting on your own behaviours, your own biases, and the ways in which you might be led to hurt, deceive, and dehumanise others.

People sleepwalk in to evil and characterising evil as a static and innate trait is akin hitting the damn snooze button on your own moral alarm clock.

If your high school best friend grows up to be a murderer as an adult, it doesn’t necessarily mean they were secretly evil all along and you “should have seen” they were a murderer-in-waiting. It means their circumstances and choices of their lives between then and now changed them from the nice kid they used to be, into something terrible.

Just as, if your high school bully grows up to run a grassroots charity and be keystone of their local community, it doesn’t mean they’re faking it - it means something happened to stop them being an arsehole. It doesn’t undo the harm they did to you then, but the harm they did then doesn’t negate the good they do now.

People change! For better, for worse, in directions they never guessed. And you might too.

That’s the key bit here: you might change too.

[queervegancryptid]

Joker and I agree on one thing, I guess.

Following you and a couple other people on here has made it clear that I really need to read more comics. As a kid, I was raised in a rural area by conservative parents. Not outright abusive, mostly, but definitely not people I could be myself around, and basically anytime I was enthusiastic about something, people gave me shit for it. So if childhood was an exercise in learning to hide in plain sight in order to survive, adulthood for me has been a journey of letting myself be myself and explore stuff I wasn't allowed to explore as a kid.

It's also been a journey of realizing how much the adults in my life fully failed me as a kid. I only really understood how much their shit affected me when I first really felt loved and accepted by someone, without having to hide, and that didn't happen until I was past 30. Now that I'm able to start making moves to sort my shit out, the Orange Menace is being sworn in, so there are about to be more forces than ever invested in keeping me miserable and beaten down.

So in a very real sense, I'm scared about what's happening politically. I'm angry, too, for obvious reasons, many of which are not personal to me. I don't have to be an undocumented immigrant to think they should be treated with basic human decency, for example. I don't have to be Jewish to be horrified by people chanting shit about them. I don't have to be a target at all to give a fuck, but I'm trans, so I have the distinction of being labeled a problem and the knowledge that I'm in one of the last groups that will be defended when shit hits the fan.

But I am angry and frankly annoyed for personal reasons. And one of those reasons is that I spent my life hiding and trying to be acceptable, and when it didn't work, I thought it was my fault. I'm not perfect, but I feel like the deck was stacked against me from the start, and making it my fault was just one big scam to keep me complacent. I'm annoyed that it fucking worked so well and for so long.

The annoyance also comes from the fact that these people are living rent-free in my head and controlling so much of my life. But that's part of how they make you feel helpless, you know? You focus on all the weight they're throwing around, and you get overwhelmed by the brutality and cruelty of it all, and you feel so exhausted that you start to wonder what the hell the point even is of talking about it.

But that's what they want. I've survived out of spite before, and I'll do it again. The last thing they want is for people like you and me to enjoy anything in life and find reasons to keep going, which is exactly why you have to keep finding reasons wherever you can, in whatever form they take. So I'm going to enjoy what I enjoy and explore what I want to explore, because finding some kind of joy and good in the world when and where I can is the only way I'm going to survive all the things that are coming.

Thank you for existing, by the way. Sorry I wrote a book on here. I'm going through some stuff, as you might have guessed lol

🚨WATCH: Donald Trump and JD Vance mockingly laugh at the National Prayer Service when the National Cathedral Bishop proclaims "let us pray for the most vulnerable."

These monsters are the antethesis of what Jesus preached.

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 118

Everyone is freaking out. The titan tower was broken into, no signs of who it was, and Tim- Robin- is missing. There’s blood on the walls, taunting them, implying that Tim is going through agony, and they can’t deal with another dead Robin, they can’t- 

Meanwhile Tim is bemused, maybe a little concussed because that would explain things maybe, as he’s found himself in a living room full of books and there’s a pair of kids too? One is straight up adoption bait- wait no there’s three, with two of them being adoption bait and the third being a redhead. There’s a trio of small children there already playing by the couch he’s been bundled into. 

Where the heck is his mask- or his bo staff or any of his supplies- is that the fucking Red Hood?! No, couldn’t be, must be the concussion, because why would the Red Hood be feeding him a bowl of soup?

[angstflavoured]

ppl too scared to make them ugly freaks

[seeminglyseph]

it's so funny to me... looking at video reactions and content about the anime of Erased and realize how many people felt like... idk. cuckolded? by the fact that Kayo did not end up with Satoru in the end, but with Hiromi, the boy who also would have died if the timeline had not been reset.

and like. some of my amusement comes from like... my own ignorance in not realizing that would be a reaction. because like. Obviously. We've been in Satoru's shoes this entire journey and it felt like, especially in the anime, Kayo and Satoru were having these big meaningful moments. like. how could that not be a romance? even though Satoru repeatedly is like 'I am 30, I'm not catching feelings in this situation, what am I doing?'

which I took as like. "Oh, he's inhabiting his little 8 year-old body and also has not had social connection in a long time and is just... having emotions. and Satoru's story is about learning to care and feel again. because adult Satoru had shut down so much due to the trauma of both losing so much in his youth and having the adults around him cope by basically refusing to deal with it and shutting it down. Returning to his childhood before the trauma is reawakening his ability to connect, trust and feel again. Which is something adult Satoru is as confused and unfamiliar with as child Satoru would be with a crush so it reads very similar."

but I also like. ran out of episodes at episode 9, then read the manga, then got like... really really invested in what the story had to say about trauma and the cycles of abuse and silence and well meaning cruelty and convenient victims and patterns of violence and community scapegoats and justice and how people act to preserve face and the justice system and like... the anime picked one thing in the manga to focus on and it was Kayo. and it did that thing like... really really masterfully. it made Kayo's story so heartrending that people forgot almost entirely about everything else. but like. the manga is about like... multiple other subjects of which Kayo features predominantly but like. The character that Satoru is freaking out about having been killed in his flashbacks in the manga is Hiromi, because Hiromi was his friend. It doesn't change the fact that Kayo is very impactful, but the story doesn't revolve entirely around her. So the fact that Hiromi and Kayo found love instead of death, but many anime viewers seem to forget entirely that Hiromi is also a would-be murder victim, is because so much of the non-Kayo story is just... not present or altered.

And even stuff with Kayo because like. She came back after being taken to her grandmother and helped them with the investigation and protection of Aya, the other potential murder victim that goes to a different school.

Honestly sometimes I feel like even people who talk about the anime ending being bad vs the manga ending, miss the parts of the manga that the anime changes. The anime is very excellent for what it is as a stand alone piece, however since it had adapted so much out of the manga to make itself a stand alone piece it didn't give itself an ending that matched what it had created. The anime had devoted itself entirely to the Kayo aspects of the story because they evoked such strong emotions, but the ending... isn't about Kayo. because in the manga, the story wasn't about Kayo. the thing that seems kind of funny to me is, they were stuck with 2 episodes to wrap up a fat chunk of the manga. They were always gonna have to do an anime original ending. They *could* have just gone balls to the wall and gone completely original and played into the fact that they'd been focusing on Kayo the whole time. Not necessarily "waits for him the whole time" but something that puts more focus on her to give more emotional catharsis to the audience. Instead it went with the option no one was happy with and did a limp noodle fast adaptation of the last chunk of the manga with no character development or deduction or planting from the rest of the anime because half the scenes that made any of it make sense got cut.

And now everyone remembers Erased as that great anime with a terrible ending. which sucks because the manga honestly really has a lot to say about a lot of topics. And the anime is artistic and beautiful as hell. but like. the fact that so much of the message is fully not like... either adapted or perceived by audiences or like. Ignored. feels like a sign of something kind of frustrating...

Or I am overthinking big time. That's. I guess a possibility. It might not be that deep, but I think it is. there just might be a level of clumsiness in its execution sometimes, but I think the themes and messages are still there...

[botmilf]

wanna quickly add to this because I've gotten a few snarky messages for this one lol. But not just because of that. I genuinely find this sort of interesting.

"Well he mirrors Sonic and Sonic in the movie is very clearly a child so--" they mirror each other in the game universe too, and they don't have ages there. When Sonic and Shadow were first designed they weren't done so adhering to some age group. Because all the characters in the Sonic Canon have the pretty much the same proportions lol. There is absolutely nothing about Sonic or Shadow physically that confirms them to be children/teenagers if you're going off of human standards and this is also true for the SCU because like, Knuckles looks almost exactly like his dad at whatever age he is now. And sure Sonic might be a kid in the SCU but we're not talking about him, we're talking about Shadow.

"Gerald referred to him and Maria as 'kids' and Walters said 'those are children!'" Yes, and all that was before Shadow was put in stasis for 50 years. Now, again, I interpreted this as more of a grouped-in sense because he goes along with whatever Maria gets up to. He's an alien. He doesn't know how old he is, or even what he is. It's safe to say that the people around him don't definitively know either.

ALSO based on what he says MULTIPLE times throughout the movie about having to live with the anger for 50 years, that suggests Shadow was at least somewhat conscious. He didn't quite know how much time had passed, but arrested development doesn't make you a minor lol and it wouldn't make him one either. Vi from Arcane is a prime example of this. She was thrown into a dark cell on a prison island for like 10 years starting when she was 14. She still does/thinks in ways, at times, that a teenager would rather than an adult, but that doesn't make her a minor. That just means she's deeply, deeply traumatized--as Shadow is.

Here's the thing too: We don't know what the aging process is like for Mobians in this universe. We don't know how similar or dissimilar it is from humans. Shadow doesn't make this any clearer because we also don't know if this SCU version of him is immortal like in the games. We also don't know if he was engineered as-is like in the games either. We just do not know and I think that in the case of Shadow, it's okay for there to be some nuance.

Lastly, I kiiiinda feel like if the movie had any interest on selling the idea of Shadow being a child in a very literal sense, Keanu Reeves wouldn't have been casted and they would've gotten someone who can at least be convincing as a kid lol. I can suspend my disbelief for some things but Keanu's voice coming out of a child? Nah bro come on lmao.

Look, The movie gives us no definitive answers. At the end of the day that's pretty much what I'm saying in a very long sense. Sorry for the long ass post I'm just being a nerd lol.

SCU Shadow the Hedgehog age discourse rant:

The Shadow the Hedgehog age discourse is kind of crazy because Sega retconned everyone’s age YEARS ago and Shadow never even technically had one because in the games he was created in a lab and in the movie he’s an alien that fell from the sky as-is. It’s not that he doesn’t age, it’s that he doesn’t HAVE an age.

Shadow in the SCU universe is referred to collectively alongside Maria as a kid because, like, bro he’s an alien that knows literally nothing about the world and he’s like 4 ft tall fluff ball. You WOULD treat him like a child, not because he IS physically a child, but because he needs the guidance and supervision of one in a world that he doesn’t understand. Also he’s with Maria, an actual kid, all the time just by way of her living at the laboratory, so it makes sense to refer to them both collectively as ‘kids’ because he goes along with whatever mischief she gets into. It makes sense that the soldiers around the facility would view him as a child too. Not because Shadow physically IS a minor, but because you’d have to treat him like one.

Also he’s voiced by fucking Keanu Reeves homie.

Idk man I’m just tired of seeing people’s comments section get lit up by a bunch of dickheads every time they post a thirst tiktok or make suggestive art/fanfic. People straight up saying shit like “ummm he’s 15” like no he literally, canonically is not lol wtf.

He has no actual age and he never will because he’s FUCKING IMMORTAL LOL

[sciderman]

I would say you’re more of a Mr peanut butter type yeah

doggy doggy what now?

[lightblueminecraftorchid]

they call me the griever because halfway through a thing I enjoy I’m already sad that it’s closer to being over

[bookpdf]

guy who looks up "house party" on wikipedia and googles "what is a house party like reddit" before going out

[dragoninahumancostume]

My favorite part of being alive is that I've never felt welcome in any space except for that one year when I thought I was a non-binary bisexual asexual girl when I was 13 :)

[the-busy-ghost]

Warning- this is a very petty post, but I think I'm entitled to at least one petty, pissed-off reaction every time I finish a classic novel that hit harder than I expected so take this as my quota for the year.

Also spoiler warning for a book that came out over a century ago but still, I didn't know the plot going in so don't want to ruin it for anyone else, if you haven't read it shut your eyes. (Also Local Tumblr User Going Wild Over Book Published a Hundred Years Ago That Everybody Else Already Read should probably be categorised as akey part of indigenous tumblr culture at this point).

Anyway I just finished the War of the Worlds and in between studying I've thinking about Themes and Motifs as you do, and idly looking for further analysis. I then accidentally ran into an article called 'A Quiet Place II Succeeds Where the War of the Worlds Failed' and:

Now I haven't seen any of the Quiet Place films, this is not a rant against them and of course everyone is entitled to their own opinions. But re: the ending of The War of the Worlds, I have to ask, did this guy somehow miss, uh, the entire point of the book or am I just utterly insane?

[thedreadvampy]

idk I had a very interesting therap today but I just

like it's all very well to recognise that I gotta have a fucking open-ended breakdown and jump face first into the Sadness Bog sometimes instead of sitting on all my feelings

but like

I still have to go to work, you know? it's like. ok yeah have a breakdown which like until you jump into it you don't know if it's going to last an hour or a year. yeah go ahead that's all grand. you do have to get up in the morning and go to work though. you're not allowed to not do that. or to not pay the rent or not shower or not eat.

like all my friends and loved ones are constantly like 'you know you're allowed to be sad right' and it's like. AM I??? because I STILL HAVE TO PAY RENT.

[genderdog]

every time i listen to ugly death no redemption i go fucking insane about ice the last generation again