#they make me so sad i cant
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Diggin’ the dancing queen!
#clethan#re7#resident evil 7#resident evil biohazard#clancy jarvis#ethan winters#idc if no one knows ab this ship its literally my favourite thing ever bwAHH#they make me so sad i cant#they deserve to be happy and in love idc#completely normal guys forever#welcomehomere7au#its a non canon branch of welcome home for me and pincer LOL#not canon at all#theyd be soooo healthy soooo healthy
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Thalia doesn’t keep many things in the hundreds of years she’s been alive.
But long ago, there were people, their names all but distant memories, who mattered in her 1st lifetime. It’s their things that stay hidden in her bag, reminding her of her mortal life.
A blue hoodie, worn almost threadbare. The scent of its original owner, long since leached from the fabric. But if she closes her eyes, she can almost see the blue eyes of her first and only love.
A pair of glasses. Frames cracked and crooked. A reminder of a brother she never got to truly know.
A baseball cap. It’s magic long faded, branded with a forgotten logo. Memories of a blonde girl laughing hidden deep within.
A letter. Ink fading, paper yellow. The last words of a dying friend. Words that wish her well, words that wished her well in a world they had fought side by side to save.
Thalia doesn’t keep a lot of things, but even after all this time, Luke, Jason, Annabeth, and Percy will stay with her forever. The memories of her first family to remind her why life is so beautiful.
#I know i forgot grover but i cant think of anything for him#percy jackon and the olympians#percabeth#percy jackson#percy and annabeth#annabeth chase#thaluke#thalia grace#pjo thalia#jason grace#hunters of artemis#thalia grace is my current roman empire#someday she'll live so long that she'll forget their names and their voices and that makes me physically sick#thaluke were doomed by the narritive#this is sad sorry
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Mizu, femininity, and fallen sparrows
In my last post about Mizu and Akemi, I feel like I came across as overly critical of Mizu given that Mizu is a woman who - in her own words - has to live as a man in order to go down the path of revenge.
If she is ever discovered to be female by the wrong person, she will not only be unable to complete her quest, but there's a good chance that she'll be arrested or killed.
So it makes complete sense for Mizu to distance herself as much as possible from any behavior that she feels like would make someone question her sex.
I felt so indignant toward Mizu on my first couple watchthroughs for this moment. Why couldn't Mizu bribe the woman and her child's way into the city too? If Mizu is presenting as a man, couldn't she claim to be the woman's escort?
However, this moment makes things pretty clear. Mizu knows all too well the plight of women in her society. She knows it so well that she cannot risk ever finding herself back in their position again. She helps in what little way she can - without drawing attention to herself.
Mizu is not a hero and she is not one to make of herself a martyr - she will not set herself on fire to keep others warm. There's room to argue that Mizu shouldn't prioritize her quest over people's lives, but given the collateral damage Mizu can live with in almost every episode of season 1, Mizu is simply not operating under that kind of morality at this point. ("You don't know what I've done to reach you," Mizu tells Fowler.)
And while I still feel like Mizu has an obvious and established blind spot when it comes to Akemi because of their differences in station, such that Mizu's judgment of Akemi and actions in episode 5 are the result of prejudice rather than the result of Mizu's caution, I also want to establish that Mizu is just as caged as Akemi is, despite her technically having more freedom while living as a man.
Mizu can hide her mixed race identity some of the time, and she can hide her sex almost all of the time, but being able to operate outside of her society's strict rules for women does not mean she cannot see their plight.
It does not mean she doesn't hurt for them.
Back to Mizu and collateral damage, remember that sparrow?
While Mizu is breaking into Boss Hamata's manse, she gets startled by a bird and kills it on reflex. She then cradles it in her hands - much more tenderly than we've seen Mizu treat almost anything up to this point in the season:
She then puts it in its nest, with its unhatched eggs. Almost like she's trying to make the death look natural. Or like an accident.
You see where I'm going with this.
When Mizu kills Kinuyo, Mizu lingers in the moment, holding the body tenderly:
And btw a lot of stuff about this show hit me hard, but this remains the biggest gut punch of them all for me, Mizu holding that poor girl's body close, GOD
When Mizu arranges the "scene of the crime," Kinuyo's body is delicate, birdlike. And Mizu is so shaken afterward that she gets sloppy. She's horrified at this kill to the point that she can't bring herself to take another innocent life - the boy who rats her out.
MIZU'S ONE MOMENT OF SOFTNESS AND MERCY, COMING ON THE HEELS OF HER NEEDING TO KILL A GIRL TO SPARE HER THE WORST FATE THAT THIS RIGID SOCIETY HAS TO OFFER WOMEN, AND TO SPARE A BROTHEL FULL OF INNOCENT WOMEN WHO ARE THE CASTOFFS OF SOCIETY, NEARLY RESULTS IN ALL OF THEIR DEATHS
No wonder Mizu is as stoic and cold as she is.
And no wonder Mizu has no patience for Akemi whatsoever right before the terrible reveal and the fight breaks out:
Speaking of Akemi - guess who else is compared to a bird!
The plumage is more colorful, a bit flashier. But a bird is a bird.
And, uh
Yeah.
I like to think that Mizu killing the sparrow is not only foreshadowing for what she must do to Kinuyo, but is also a representation of the choice she makes on Akemi's behalf. She decides to cage the bird because she believes the bird is "better off." Better off caged than... dead.
But because Mizu doesn't know Akemi or her situation, she of course doesn't realize that the bird is fated to die if it is caged and sent back home.
Mizu is clearly not happy, or pleased, or satisfied by allowing Akemi to be dragged back to her father:
But softness and mercy haven't gotten Mizu anywhere good, recently.
There is so much tragedy layered into Mizu's character, and it includes the things she has to witness and the choices she makes - or believes she has to make - involving women, when she herself can skirt around a lot of what her society throws at women. Although, I do believe that it comes at the cost of a part of Mizu's soul.
After all, I'm gonna be haunted for the rest of this show by Mizu's very first prayer in episode 1:
"LET" her die. Because as Ringo points out, she doesn't "know how" to die.
Kind of like another bird in this show:
#blue eye samurai#mizu#akemi#kinuyo#bes#women are birds okay they are BIRDS#the let me die line is so SCARY AND SAD like a part of Mizu wants death but she cant? she doesnt know how?? excuse you show???#when all these other delicate birds are dying all around her#akemis character gets more and more gutwrenching upon subsequent rewatches because whenever she says her life is in danger#NO ONE BELIEVES HER - certainly not other women#because shes rich and pampered and that means shes safe and is worrying about nothing right? right?????#and it turns out that all of akemis instincts were right and she was in danger the ENTIRE TIME#also I need to make a post just for kinuyo because I am sad
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PHAETHON
#zzz#zenless zone zero#wise#belle#phaethon#*mgif#i think the wise gif was recorded without the color filter on so thats why it looks more saturated??#but i spent like 5 hours just recording both of them because the files kept disappearing#and i cant be bothered to do that all over again#which makes me sad bcs i wanted these to match so bad but i dont have the energy anymore</3#fellow ccs#do you guys record with obs or another recorder#because mine can only go up to 1080p#and i know some can go up to 2k
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The other homestuck post I had in me, its the year of the cringe weirdo couple, my beloveds.
#homestuck#meowrails#meowrail#equius zahhak#nepeta leijon#its pale romance hours#i hated them in the comic when i started but now i would kill for them#homestuck did em dirty#but thats what fanfic and fanart is for#even though there is shockingly little of either for them and it makes me so so so sad#relegated to background characters only#i cant fully blame them though like equius is the worst but ive come to like him when i think of him outside of his joke aspects#hes the definition of crack taken seriously#mogs art
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Firefox-official vs electronicmail
Hydrogen bomb vs coughing baby
okay come up with a better idea then. firefox-official is gone asshole it’s electronicmail or nothing
#this one was hard to respond to because it elicited the usual anon rage in me#but i had to think about it anyway.#this blog has been around for less than a month and it is driving me fucking crazy#don’t you think i know?#dont you think it hurts enough already#i dont want this blog either i want my old blog back with all my stuff on it#i would like to stick around#because i loved posting#and i get that you’re just having fun#but i’m making an example of you#less than a month vs five years#‘household name’ firefox official#spent five years building that thing#and now it’s just this.#i keep forgetting#and then i’m here again#not home#i know you all feel bad enough for me already#but it’s so hard to be myself because the environment on here is SO different#we were HAPPY#WE WERE SO HAPPY#Umm… Or whatever.#guess i could go back to firefox unofficial#but that feels far too close to the sun. and i’m done with the wings i think.#i dont mean to be so serious#a total mood killer i know#i just dont know how to proceed exactly#because when i post like normal i cant help but feel sad#and when i post about being sad its just sort of obnoxious#i’m not really asking for pity i just want to explain where i am at
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Prompt:
Instead of going for Tim, Jason goes for the easiest way to utterly destroy his Replacement and kidnaps his civilian boyfriend to demonstrate just how easy it is to lose something (or someone) you love in this line of work.
And while the whole “make the Replacement beg” part of the plan is going amazing…. Jason really didn’t plan the whole “keeping a conspiracy theorist teenager hostage” through to the end.
Bernard just wants to know what the new crime lord’s deal with Robin is. And why— and how— exactly he’s supposed to be a bargaining chip when he can count the times he met Robin on one hand. oh! and could someone maybe tell his boyfriend, Tim, that he’ll be late for their coffee date on Tuesday?
#Jason and Bernard#I aim to make that a glorious tag#anyway#I stick by it that Bernard has golden retriever energy#too precious for this cruel world#but also kickass when pushed#but it happens once a century so…#Bernard ‘this crime lord seems sad I need to help him’ dowd#Jason ‘stop trying to feed me chocolate and make me talk about feelings’ Todd#Bernard subtly trying to manipulate Jason into NOT trying to kill Robin#Jason absolutely sees through it but— it’s hard to say no to those puppy eyes okay?#meanwhile Jason is also feeding Tim with horror stories about what he’s doing to his ‘precious bf’#Tim is so wrecked he downright resorts to begging on his knees#he can’t lose Bernard#he just CANT#TimBern#TimBer#jason todd#batfamily#batfam#robin#tim drake#Bernard dowd#fanfiction#prompts
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@forgettable-au I HAD TO TAKE THINGS INTO MY OWN HANDS AFTER ALL THE ANGST, THIS WASN’T MY FAULT, THIS WASN’T MY CHOICE
#I just had this idea and now I cant get it out of my head#theyd actually be all so darn cute together#thinking about what ifs#what if wingdings wasnt a silly shut in and was just a silly guy#like papyrus#in an au where theyre all happy i couldn’t just not also include papyrus#undertale#forgettable au#forgettable au fanart#undertale au#undertale au of an au#this is like the 5th time ive referenced this specific moment in one of the mini comics#IT JUST MAKES ME SO SAD#LIKE DAMN SANS#GET DENIED???
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.🖤🔄🤍.
#the cat witchs guild#the misc adventures of mochi and lime#tcwg#tmaomal#limochi#art#mochi#lime#ocs#original#PALETTE SWAP PALETTE SWAP PALETTE SWAP !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#ive been wanting to do this for so long....the m-34th purposely makes their uniforms white to be the anti-witch black color#and they both look DAMN FINE#limes def thinking abt how she looks like a bride#it took me a while to decide if i should also swap the gold#but the gold looks too good with the uniform...#i cant stop looking at this#ignore my sad excuse for crossed legs at this angle i gave up#hehe it reminds of an idea i have in beta about the m-34th letting witches off the hook post-ending#and changing their uniforms to black#idk if thats actually what happens but it would be wholesome for lime to come home in a black uniform#and mochi gets all emotional he looks so handsome#i just realized i messed up some of his uniform details#this is what i get for not looking at references for my own characters#also what i get for rushing a piece in 2 hours instead of taking my time#cat bow hat really fucks man#edit: i fixed the things that were bothering me hehe
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I don't know what this is all I know is that LimL Joel makes me really emotional
#I know he has a tendency to go deranged on his red lives but idk something about him beginning to lose it after Jimmy died and killing Grian#joel smallishbeans#smallishbeans fanart#trafficblr#Again its his red life shenanigans but... If only Jimmy had known how affected someone was by his death. I'm choosing to believe this#and him then going out like a sad pathetic wet cat even with Grian's sacrifice... He really deserves a win one of these days lmao please#Also I cant stop thinking about how Jimmy wouldn't have left him. Grian was sensible to and most players probs would have#Joel really does become a lost cause so its fair and Grian did still care (and went to say goodbye as well as sacrifice his time for him)#But Jimmy would have stuck by even if Joel were in this state (and they'd both get themselves killed pathetically but)#And Joel having shown such genuine care for Jimmy and concern over his limited time... man anything w Jimmy makes me so emotional lol#I love them so#oh Ig about the art itself. I dont like it but hey thats how it tends to go when you try smth new. And no shame in trying#but if one person likes this then yayy I will still feel accomplished and happy#Im looking at this again and hey its not that bad actually yay I love to approve of my own art. self love hell yea#tubby art
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the song of humanity will continue to be sung
#vash the stampede#trigun#trigun stampede#he means so much to me he means sooooo much i love him so much asfuahghdsgnkdsgk#VASHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#i posted it on twit but i was REALLY dreading ep 11 bc i figured that vash might cry#but instead he screamt into agony in which i cant even rewatch the episode#bc the va did such a good fucking job in conveying that terror and grief and guilt and it fucks me up so bad#vash makes me sad in EVERY adaption but stampede is like#we've only seen him be kind. he's just nice. he's serious and he's nice and he's kind. he treats everyone with so much delicateness and care#and the only time he raises his voice is for the protection of others and warning them#and now he's rung the wranger and i now have a hammer to knives' side#not even trying to be dramatic its just been awhile since a character has mattered to me in this kind of way#ruporas art
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whoops gay awakening part xx
#its that one scene in the donghua#scum villian self saving system#scum villain#shen qingqiu#sorry nothing revolutionary from me#more lazy rendered 3/4 busts haazah#anyways guys do you know that i cant stop thinking about nie mingjue and huaisang#they make me so sad i keep obsessing over how huaisang dealt with his grief OR if he even#let himself mourn before he finished enacting his revange#i have so many thoughts i should make a side blog for all my dumb thoughts
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#a doodley#i had to make this blue so tumblr would stop hiding it from the dash#anyway no caption this happened 2 hrs ago#im happy abt my surgery but it and other things this year keep beinging conversations like these up#and i cant handle it at all.#everything my dad tells me just makes me feel worse and not bc its anything bad but bc I Feel Bad#like the conversation then continued to him being like no dont cry im just saying i wpuld have wanted to#quit my job decades ago and set aside money so I wouldnt be struggling as much now but that didnt happen#and i just dont want that to happen to you guys :)#so we have to support u so that your life is what u want it to be#and i cried even more bc what do u mean. thats so sad. ur a person and u were a child and baby once and ur gonna die#and you always almost cry when u talk about your mom who passed away decades ago#and your brothers that passed away#recently and im going to be your age and still sobbing bc i miss my dad. just like i have been prematurely crying about since i was 7#the other day my dad asked my mom if i cried a lot when i was a baby/kid and my mom said no and then my dad#said that when i Did cry it was so severe he thought i would ''drown in my own tears''#bc i could never stop. like. thats still true today. ive been crying on and off since then#i think i mentioned he's just been telling me stories about his life lately and it further fuels this. i get so sad. im sorry your life was#like this. i dont want to die i dont want you to die im sad im sorry im sorry#im scared. im never going to see you again. how horrible. how horrible#i cant enjoy my day today bc every day is a day closer and i get sad
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real smooth moves!!
[image description: a reanimated gif from the music video for experimental film by they might be giants, drawn with human versions of strong bad, homestar, and strong mad from homestar runner. strong bad is depicted as a tan-skinned trans man with messy blue hair poking out from under his mask, homestar is depicted as a dark-skinned man with curly dark brown hair and freckles, and strong mad is depicted as a tan-skinned bald man. the three of them each dance back and forth before jumping out at the viewer, at which point the animation loops. end id]
#if you see that coloring error no you dont. im not fixing it you cant make me#anyways i keep rewatching this music video. it makes me so happy#also the song is a banger so that helps#i like to think that since strong sad directed it she couldve easily taken these three out#but she does genuinely like them a lot :o] even strong bad#anyways. enjoy some full-motion strong biddies#homestar runner#hsr#h*r#strong bad#strong mad#oh ya also strong mad is the same i just surgically removed his head from his torso#doc talks#my art#flashing tw#doc's animations
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rut was really good im such a sucker for anything that just wants to be uplifting and genuine. so, here is them :3
#brightheart#cloudtail#warrior cats#art#i wanted to draw the designs they used for the map but i cant find official ref sheets anywhere wahhjksdf#god whenever anyone makes a video w these two it never fails to make me cry.#swiftpaw too T-T#ALSO IM SO SORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG TO RESPOND TO THE LIONBLAZE ANSWERS YOU GUYS SENT#I WANTED TO ANSWER W DRAWINGS BUT CAUGHT UP W ART FIGHT AND I JUST. got burnt out w drawing lion#i think#which is a... problem that you can imagine#. how sad i am about
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more doodles, since I've been so busy! Sketched out Shamura finally....along with exploring the idea that Shamura's prophecies also appeared in abstract webs they've weaved along the years....I think its just Neat(tm)
also: when ur vessel keeps dying just to stare at you with unyielding saucer-like eyes filled with an indescribable bloodlust silently. just fucked up lamb things
#cult of the lamb#cult of the lamb fanart#cotl lamb#cotl shamura#cotl narinder#i cant fuckin draw lately but its fine. i need to write my fic anyways SIGH#also i love shamura and they make me so sad conceptually. their lucidity always in flux but still full of love for their siblings#kinda makes you forget theyre cult leaders!#shamura is making me even MORE MAD bc i can't pin their design right. kallamar was easy in comparison omfg#i'll draw proper fanart soon and not just Doodles In The Void
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