#they make me forget how to a functioning member of society

[addictvettel]

Womp womp😭😂👎🏼

[area51-escapee]

I keep getting angry at things it’s time to go to bed

[natasharswifey]

Happy birthday, by the way 🎂

Natasha Romanoff x fem!reader

Requests open <3

Summary: After a few months of dating, you realise you don't know when Nat's birthday is. She isn't interested in celebrating, and when you ask, she refuses to tell you. But you are very determined.

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A/N: This is just a little fluff, also my first x reader fic. Love reading em so I thought I'd give it a go :3. Also I find it hard to read Y/N as my name so I'm using [...] instead!

Tags: Just fluff <3

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"Oh, come on, why won't you just admit it?"

"Because I can't deal with you inviting half of the United States to the tower for a party."

"Exaggeration."

Natasha raises a brow at you. "Oh really? And what about he time you put flyers around about Wanda's party?"

"She was turning 21!"

She gives you a 'really?' look and you know you aren't getting anything out of her. It just didn't make any sense, birthdays were the one day a year where it was all about you. Well that's everyday if you're Tony Stark, but for well functioning members of society it should count as the best day of the year.

"I will not be disclosing that information until I can trust you not to make a huge deal."

"What if I pinky promise?"

"You always overdo it, detka, it's just how you are." She plants a small kiss on your forehead and leaves you on the couch to begin plotting.

___♡___

"And then she said 'you always overdo it', give me a break!"

Wanda looks up from the pot she's stirring and chuckles, "I didn't know half the people the showed up at the tower on my 21st, [.....]"

"I knew I should've gone to Tony, he would get this."

"I don't think asking the most flamboyant Avenger would be very helpful in this situation."

"Right."

"I think you should just leave it, she'll probably tell you eventually." She gently taps a bit of salt into the pot.

"Or..."

"No."

"You didn't even hear me out!"

"I can read minds. It's a terrible idea."

"Firstly, reading Nat's mind to figure out her birthday is literally a flawless plan, and secondly, you're good reading my mind and not hers?"

"Natasha already set her boundaries with me, and plus I don't feel like getting my ass kicked for aiding and abetting."

"Thanks a lot Wands."

"Any time."

If Wanda wasn't going to cooperate then you were simply going to have to enlist the help of a certain blonde assassin.

___♡___

You hear Lucky and Fanny barking hysterically after you ring the doorbell, followed by fast paced footsteps and a small "One minute" from the other side of the door.

Usually a simple question would only warrant a text or phone call, but for some reason Yelena NEVER answers her phone. Unless it's from Kate of course, you're half convinced that she has a special ringtone and notification for her.

It's none other than the archer that answers the door, "Hey, [.....]! I didn't know you were coming over."

"I've actually dropped in unannounced, but I won't stay too long." You reassure her. Kate has a habit of forgetting things, including scheduled hang outs and honestly everything else that isn't attached to her body.

"Come on in!" She steps out of the way and shuts the door behind both of you.

You're immediately greeted by the two large dogs, fighting over your attention in a confusion of wagging tails and paws. Kate tries to get them under control and ultimately fails until they're distracted by Yelena calling them.

"That's totally not fair, they only listen to you." Kate complains and Yelena laughs.

"Because they love me more."

"Lies and deception!" Kate is soon distracted by the golden retriever pulling at her sleeve and gives Yelena a smug look before pouring all of her attention to him.

"Hey, Yelena."

"Hello, [......]. To what do we owe the pleasure?"

"Uh, I actually had a quick question. When's Natasha’s birthday?"

"Ah. I do not know."

"What?? But you're sisters!"

She shrugs, "She does not want me to know. Birthdays are not really Natasha’s thing, surely you must know that."

"Yeah, I know, it just doesn't make any sense."

"That's Natasha for you."

You sigh in defeat and sit down on one of the armchairs, your lap immediately occupied by Fanny who still wholeheartedly believes she's the size of a puppy.

"Well, there is someone else you could ask."

Your ears perk up, "Who?"

"Melina."

Ah. Melina. It wouldn't be fair to say that she hated you, but it also would be lying to say that she was fond of you. Perhaps you could ask Alexei instead.

___♡___

"Hello? Can you hear me?" You ask over the phone to your future father in law.

"HELLO? ARE YOU THERE, [......]?"

"Yeah, I'm-"

"I THINK MY WHATISUP IS BROKEN- MELINA!"

"No, no, Alexei there's really no need."

You hear the sound of footsteps and Melina scolding Alexei for always forgetting to turn up the volume before she picks up the phone.

"Hello?"

"Ah, hello Melina."

"[........]. Do you need something?"

"When's Natasha’s birthday?"

"December third. Is that all?"

"But- that's today."

"I'm aware."

"Well, thank yo-" The phone cuts off before you finish your sentence and you're left with about two hours to plan a surprise party for a spy.

___♡___

"I did it, Wanda!"

"Only took you half the day."

"Okay, hater, I need you to help me surprise her."

"Are you sure this is a good idea?"

"One hundered percent." You reply confidently. For most of the day you'd been discouraged, but now it was time for you to trust your gut.

Soon enough you've formed a team of Kate, Yelena and Wanda gathered in one of the common rooms of the tower.

"Alright, Wanda you can be in charge of snacks, Kate you can do decorations, and Yelena you can find us the cake."

"Can-"

"No it may not have profanities on it."

The blonde sighs but jumps into action with the other two. Now all you have to do is buy them some time.

___♡___

You greet Natasha at the tower's entrance with a huge smile plastered on your face.

"Hi, Nat!"

"Hey, [.......]. How was your day?"

"A little hectic. Wanna go for a walk?"

"I would love to but I need to sleep for at least ten hours straight."

You step in front of Natasha as she starts to head inside, "Wait- Uh, did you know walking actually improves energy levels?"

Natasha raises an eyebrow, "What's up with you?"

"Nothing."

"For some strange reason I do not believe that." She holds you in place by your shoulders and steps around you, but you take her arm and try to steer her to the kitchen, your plans are foiled by Lucky and Fanny who bound up to Natasha happily.

"What are Yelena and Kate's kids doing here? Seriously, what is going on?"

"Uhh."

"Insightful."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

She stares you down for a few seconds before suddenly moving towards your shared quarters and only speeds up once she realises you're trying to stop her.

The red head clears the stairs in a few seconds and opens the door, only to be met with pitch black. When she steps through and flicks on the light Wanda, Yelena and Kate jump out from behind the couch and yell "Surprise!".

The look on her face is priceless when she turns to you, "How- when did you-"

"I have my ways."

Natasha pulls you into a tight hug and you hug her back even tighter when you feel a small damp patch forming on your shoulder.

___♡___

"Okay, now make a wish!" Yelena says excitedly, the three of you are crowded around the table where the birthday girl sits in front of her cake.

"Alright, alright." She closes her eyes and blows out the candles, which prompts a cheer from everyone in the room.

The five of you all squish onto the couch to watch a movie and eat snacks and cake, with Natasha curled into your side.

"So, did I 'overdo' it?" You ask playfully.

You hear her chuckle, "It was perfect."

____☆____

Tysm for readinggg, If you liked it I have more stuff in my masterlist :)). Reqs are open!!

Also, if you saw the unfinished version of this when I posted it by accident, no you did not.

@l0nelyish 👁👁

[heartofbusan]

My live reactions of AYS's final (for now 😌) episode 💛💜

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Jimin really had a lot of input on the itineraries and restaurants. He should get a producing credit 🤧 : 'Keeper of JK's every want, need and desire in the form of food, accommodation and more 👀': Park Jimin

OH MY BABY Like Crazyyyy!!

They really are the top singers in Korea lmao. You sometimes forget it, with how normally weird they are.

The owners of the restaurant must have been thrilled to have them. #Blessed

The boyfriend shot!?!?!? YOUR HONOR! HE DID NOT deny nor refute the outright allegation!!

Jungkook enjoys life to the fullest.

Also, Jk loves beer.

ESCUSE ME?!?!?!?

THEY GET FLIRTY WHEN DRUNK. DRUNK SHENANIGANS HAVE HAPPENED. I AM SURE OF IT.

Jungkook is such a good boy. You tell him to do something, and he does it. #obedient

JK's stomach makes all his life's decisions.

This hot tub scene is going to end me as a functioning member of society. WHAT THE HELLLLLLLLL

THIS SURE IS NICE

THIGHS. NO NOTES.

COME ON BABY?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!? WHAAST

Jimin doesn’t want to extend JKs suffering. So sweet!!

"That’s my Jungkook." Omg

"HONEY"

WTF IS HAPPENING, SHOULD I LEAVE THE ROOM

Baby reference no. 4852820 and counting.

-The more relaxed they are, the more they forget they're being filmed. The touches increase, and the fawning commences. Also, Jimin watching himself and seeing how he's presenting himself for the show is such an interesting occurrence. There's an interesting thought happening there as he becomes aware of it... Is he seeing and becoming aware of his layer of veneer as they were filming? He scaled it back for sure. He let more of his acute feelings through as the seasons progressed. I love that it became less like work for him.

-They are idiots! And I love them for it! The Jeon Park household is filled with laughter. And grunting ofc. Don't forget the copious amounts of grunting. I'm watching this at work and by God if someone walks in on me listening to this...I'll get called into HR 😃 #worthit

ONGOD JIMIN ON THE FLOOR LEGS SPREAD WHO APPROVED THIS MESSAGE?!?!

Also: Jungkook loves cooking. Whomever is making fun of him for choosing to be in the kitchen is an idiot. Please always be happy JK!

Precedent. This show is setting it. Remember it well.

You realize that they have the means to travel like this all the time?!?! But they chose to take us with them? WE ARE BLESSED.

Jimin always finds a moment to connect, physically as well as emotionally. He'll never leave his man hanging on a joke.

BUT JUNGKOOK IS RIGHT THERE WITH HIM ON THE EQ SCALE..He sees Jimin fully, and he treats him gently and with tender care. Knowing Jimin is quiet because the trip is nearing its end😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

They deserve to live their lives without serving us. Without feeling like they need to show us, just because it makes us happy to see them happy. Then again, if this is them normalizing them as a unit and seeing them together, and if it serves them just as much as it does us. Well then I hope they keep up this exceptional excuse to make content. The hate will always be there. The shippers too.

But what will never change is the commitment they have towards each other. They really do complete one another *bawling*

I loved this episode! It was so relaxed and paired back. They really are a give and take couple, giving each other space, patience or attention. Really, they should get married. It's just too perfect a union.

[shunin-gumis]

Nagi Hachinoya Novel

Essence of a Bouquet

Track 01 - Secret Energy that can attract Happiness

Please note that the novel contains some major spoilers in regards to Nagi's past that is revealed in L4mps main story before you read!

The dialogues do not actually state who is speaking, but I noted it anyways to make it easier to understand.

"Now, let us dive deep into the sea of memories…"

As if guided by the voice I hear from the podium, I close my eyes, and dive deep into the depths of my memories.

The earliest memory I have is that of my mother, the two of us having fun at a park.

The fresh and vibrant four-leaf clover.

The happy times, immediately followed by our separation at the laundromat.

The moment I learned that the scent of partings was the smell of fresh laundry.

'……'

I open my eyes.

'Why did you have to leave me behind…'

'I want to go back to that day, a day that should have been filled with happiness.'

In the corner of a special venue in mahorova, I look around and see the avatars all around me were in tears. I had already come to terms with what happened with my mother, so I didn't join them in their tears. But I could still understand their feelings very well.

If it were truly possible for me to return to that day, I would be willing to make any sacrifice. That's what it means to be 'sad'.

This was the orientation for beginners who want to join the "Society of Secret Energy to Attract Happiness". The gathering had around 30 members, and since everyone was in their anonymous avatars, there was no way to tell anyone's age nor gender.

The person talking at the podium was known as the Flower Princess, Master Hideko. She was the one responsible for leading this gathering. She had the avatar of an old woman in her sixties… but I had a feeling that's how she looks in real life as well.

Master Hideko looked around as everyone was crying, and with a solemn yet gentle expression on her face, she started speaking.

Hideko "Please, dry your tears. I am certain that you will all be able to return to those happy days once again. "Good fortune" is simply an energy that attracts happiness based on the principle of attunement wave function, in other words if you can access your "Secret Energy", you can-"

She was using a lot of technical terms, but it was very informative. I'm glad I attended.

After joining HAMA Tours, although I was late to the party, I started browsing videos on dazzle. Strangely enough, after a bit of searching, I found that my feed was full of videos that were related to luck.

One day, I asked Buchi-san about it while I was in the living room with him.

Nagi "Seeing all these videos on the topic of luck, I wonder if it's all the rage these days…"

He responded with-

Daniel "That's just the target algorithm doing it's job."

Nagi "Algo-huh?"

Daniel "I mean, it's because you keep watching those kinds of videos all the time- ah forget it. It's too much of a pain to explain."

Nagi "So what does it mean?"

Daniel "Yeah it's all the rage, but only in your phone."

-Is what he said.

I thought it was popular because it was effective, so I'd immediately applied to join the gathering.

I myself had a predisposition that made me attract bad luck proportional to the happiness that I receive. But rather than simply wanting to be happy for the sake of being happy, I wanted to be able to spread happiness through my flowers, which meant I had to be happy first.

Hideko "Say it together now, Secret Energy!!"

Master Hideko's voice grew louder. As if everyone was pulled by an invisible force, they all stood up together. I got up in a hurry as well.

"Secret Energy!"

"Secret Energy!!"

Before I knew it, everyone was chanting "Secret Energy" over and over while hugging the person next to them.

I see, this is the power of "Secret Energy".

Everyone was hugging the person next to them as if it was the most natural thing in the world to do.

In which case, the person next to me…

Black cat avatar "Secret Energy!"

When I looked over, a person with a black cat avatar was already waiting with their arms wide open.

Nagi "Secret Energy!"

That's why I returned the hug as well.

I don't think I've ever hugged anyone before, but now that I have, I could feel my heart being filled even in this virtual space.

I don't even know this person, and even if it's just through virtual avatars, this is not something that I'd experience normally. Is this one of the secrets to happiness?

As a matter of fact, the avatar in front of me seemed quite happy. There was something about it that made you feel a connection, beyond age, gender or even words.

Once again, Master Hideko's voice full of love washed over us.

Hideko "The next gathering will be for the intermediate level, so make sure you all do your assignments before you attend!"

Nagi "Phew… that was quite the passionate session."

I got a glimpse into ways of increasing happiness from a perspective that's different from mine. As I thought, it was good thing that I participated today.

Just as I was about to log out, I felt a tap on my shoulder-

Black cat avatar "Hello again! I just wanted to say, it was a really fulfilling time despite being a beginner's session."

It was the person with the black cat avatar.

Nagi "I agree. I'm looking forward to the next session."

Black cat avatar "Right!"

Since I felt like I shared in some happiness with this person, I couldn't help talk with them at that moment.

Apparently, he was a 35 year old male. Although I was one generation younger than him, he didn't mind at all and was very frank, all smiles.

Black cat avatar "I'm glad I got to meet someone I can get along with! Feel free to talk to me the next time you see me!"

Nagi "Yes, I will."

Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 /Part 5

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

Granted, tumblr’s search function may broken but I can’t find a post on your blog centered on Alya’s writing. As a person constantly on the look out for critical examination of Alya’s role in the narrative and the compromises on her principles, relationships and competences made to artificially engineer the episode’s story, I’d be very interested to see your thoughts

I use Alya's writing as an example of a character done dirty all the time, but I don't think I've ever done a sugar post focused on her and I totally should. Before we get into it, I will openly admit that her bad writing bothers me more than Marinette's or Adrien's because she is best girl and we stan her. What can I say, I'm a writer whose best friend is an artist with a diagnosed anxiety disorder. I like characters who are writers and with artsy, anxiety-ridden best friends. They are my people and that gives us a great starting point for this post.

Marinette is the unambiguous main character of the show, so it makes sense to design both her hero partner and her best friend around balancing her out, giving them strengths to fill out the spots where she is weak. It's how you make a strong cast. When Alya is allowed the shine, she fills that balance role wonderfully and I love it! Some of my favorite moments are when Marinette goes on one of her rants and cool-headed Alya drags her back down to Earth:

Marinette: We're gonna stroll over there real cool as if we just happened to be passing by. Alya: Then what? Marinette: Then? I'll invite him out for a fruit smoothie at the end of the photo shoot! Then, we'll get married! Live happily ever after in a beautiful house and have two kids? No, three. And a dog! Maybe a cat? Nah, forget the cat. A hamster! I love hamsters! Alya: Let's just start with just happen to be passing by and see if we can get to that smoothie.

This banter from Stormy Weather is fantastic. It's exactly the type of thing I want to see from these two as it gives Alya a very different flavor of supporting role from Adrien. While Alya and Adrien are both card holding members of the Marinette hype squad, Alya is more of a voice of reason while Adrien is there to validate Marinette and follow her crazy schemes without question.

This brings us to the first issue with Alya's writing: when the plot demands it, they make her a gullible tabloid journalist even though it goes against everything her character should stand for. The reasons I'm comfortable saying this are many. The first one is that Alya is very clearly supposed to be seen as a serious journalist. That's why you get scenes like this one from Feast:

Alya: Now you know back in the day sculptures were painted, right? Most of the paint vanished over time, but tiny microscopic pigments still remain. Thanks to this special app, witness how it originally looked. But here's the big thing. All these works of art have something in common. It's the same symbol! Look, everywhere. It's like some kind of secret society emblem. As if a kind of Order of the Guardians has been watching over the superheroes since the beginning of time!

This scene would not exist if Alya was supposed to be the kind of person who only cared about getting blog hits because this type of content isn't where the money is. But money and clout aren't what Alya cares about. She's just a passionate reporter (or fan girl) who wants to know everything she can and who is having fun sharing her obsession with the world. This is an extremely important aspect of her character because it brings us to reason two that she clearly wasn't meant to be a clout chaser: if she was a tabloid journalist who only cared about hits, then she should have never been given a miraculous.

I could go on a rant her about how poorly Alya's blog is used after she becomes Rena Rouge, but I'll spare you the word count and just say that, as soon as she joined the team, she should have stopped sharing secrets on the blog. It makes sense that a blog would initially fill her need to share the fine details of her obsession, but once she's on the team, the blog should have been replaced by her teammates. She could still have the blog, but it shouldn't have things like the freaking guide to how the miraculous work that we see in the season four episode Gabriel Agreste:

Alya: The Miraculous are magical jewels that give powers to superheroes, like Ladybug's earrings and Cat Noir's ring. But supervillain Shadow Moth also has two Miraculousbrooches in his possession, and they will give him his powers. We can figure out from this that the Miraculous can either make a superhero or a supervillain. It's all riding on who wears it, which is why these jewels can't fall into just anybody's hands.

Alya, you are supposed to be Marinette's sole confidante at this point. Why are you giving the world this information? The writers are doing you dirty, my dear, and I'm so sorry. The best I can do is to promise to never treat you like this in my stuff.

Now, to be fair, there is some nuance to this. Alya is a human being. She's allowed to have flaws, so I can absolutely forgive her for getting caught up in the moment and posting scoops to her blog without thinking (see: Oblivio). That's honestly a great weakness for her character to have as it makes perfect sense for a fan girl to fan girl. At the same time, if you want to have a fan girl character who becomes part of the things she's a fan of, then you usually need to give that character something that will tone them down and make full fan girl mode something other than the standard setting.

Making your fan girl a serious reporter is a great way to do that! It allows you to have that initial bust of fan girl hype that quickly switches into serious get-the-details mode. Without that kind of complexity, Alya would just be another Wayhem and one Wayhem is already one too many.

While I will give Alya some grace on this topic and even call it a good thing for her character, the same cannot be said for her writing because the writers fail to embrace her hype as an in-the-moment weakness and it ruins her character. To put it another way, a lapse in judgement about posting a photo is excusable as a photo is quickly acquired and posted. A lapse in judgement about a full interview with a total rando who is claiming to be Ladybug's best friend is not excusable (see: Volpina). It's a completely different flavor of poor judgement as - at a minimum - it requires Alya to stand there talking to a person for several minutes and never once question what that person is saying. Those are not the behaviors of a good journalist.

Of course, this brings us to the most glaring example of Alya's character assassination: the Lila thing. Almost everything about this arc paints Alya as a terrible friend, which is a massive missed opportunity as Lila is the perfect antagonist for Alya! Who better to take down a liar than a truth seeker? It's such an easy way to give Alya her own mission to focus on, especially if you make Lila more subtle. You don't even need to have Alya believe Marinette without question. Just have her be an investigative journalist who is like, "You know what, this new girl clearly bothers Marinette and I know Marinette can get caught up in her own head, but it doesn't usually last this long. I think something is up, so I'm going to use my skills to see if Lila is telling the truth that way I know if I'm supporting the right person here." Don't have your character claim that she checks her sources and does research if you're going to turn around and have her believe whatever she hears without checking any of it!

Even outside of the Lila thing, I wish we saw more of Alya's research skills! They were such a good thing to give Marinette's best friend as Marinette is great at focusing on a clear task, but research is the kind of thing that would overwhelm her, so it makes perfect sense to make her best friend a researcher as that lets the team have someone to help track down whatever Gabriel is calling himself this week. The writers even understood this to some extent as we saw in Mr. Pigeon 72:

Alya: Marinette, how long have you been working on this? Ladybug: I dunno, six-seven days, maybe ten. Now that we're on spring break, I finally have time to put my whole heart into it! Alya: When was the last time you worked on one of your own designs? Ladybug: I do loads of designing! Look! (pointing to the contraption at her door) I designed a security system so that nobody can enter my room when I'm not in it. And if I put on this hat (puts on modified hat) I hear everything that's going on in here, even when I'm out of the room. Alya: I'm gonna have to break it to you because I'm the only one who can. THIS IS TOTALLY INSANE! Girl, trust your BFF. When I'm researching something obsessively and I can't think of anything else, that's when my mind can get really blocked. You know what you need most right now? A break! Ladybug: No way! No breaks until I find out how to keep Shadow Moth from reakumatizing people!

Remember who ultimately figures out how to keep Shadow Moth from reakumatizing people in this episode? Alya! Because her creative style is all about researching and looking at the evidence. You know, the classic skill set of a reporter?

I really do mean it when I say that the show has a fantastic setup for telling a good story. Alya's character should have been a perfect addition to Marinette's team. My favorite lineup is the line up from season two with Kagami and Luka in non-love-interest bonus roles that I won't get into here since it's a little too deviant from canon to make sense without explanation. Instead, I'll just give you the clear roles they perfectly set up and then squandered for the original miraculous five:

Ladybug: Battlefield commander

Rena Rouge: Big Picture Strategist (basically Marinette excels at reactive thinking/leading during a battle while Alya excels more at proactive thinking/long-term tactics)

Chat Noir: Peacekeeper/Heart/Hype Man

Carapace: Protector/Stop Button (much like Alya and Marinette, Nino and Adrien should have been two sides of the same coin with Adrien being focused on making everyone happy while Nino focuses on keeping everyone safe)

Queen Bee: Wild Card/Chaos Element (I love a good chaos element who is there to suggest the options that won't occur to people who have been raised to follow the rules.)

I'll also point out that this lineup would show that the characters weren't interchangeable and make the two main couples feel more unique and meant for each other. For example, Nino's tendency to encourage others to stay safe would pair terribly with Marinette's need to not get too caught up in her own thoughts. The second Nino second guesses one of her plans she'd fall apart, so she needs Adrien to be her Chat Noir. Similarly, Alya's impulsivity weakness would make her a terrible match for go, go, go Hype Noir! She needs a partner who makes her take two seconds to second guess herself. There was so much potential here you guys! So much potential! It could have been beautiful! Instead, we got canon...

There you go, my broad love letter to Alya. I could keep going, but you didn't request a specific topic, so I'm just going to end it there. Feel free to ask for more, but please do it in another ask as this is already super long and - out of kindness to my followers- I try to avoid essay after essay on the same post unless they really need to be connected.

[the-hopeless-haze]

Worried About You

Chapter 4 of If You Want It, You Can Bleed On Me (House x reader)

“I need Vicodin,” Greg says to you, walking into your office. Well. Your office when you were here. You scowl slightly at the day-old coffee in your line of vision and think about how you’ll be scolded by the other people you share the office with the rest of the week when you inevitably forget that it’s there.

“Funny. I’m not your dealer,” you say.

You and Greg had hit it off, so to speak. Much to everyone’s chagrin and surprise, you continued seeing each other inside and outside the hospital. It wasn’t something either of you spoke about. Psychiatrists (or psychiatric doctors of nursing) are the worst patients and the best repressors. You did what you had to to be able to function like a member of society, but you were as fucked up as the rest of them. And you see Greg is similar. USA-renowned, if not world-renowned, diagnostician—but that was all he had besides a bum leg and a healthy dose of chronic depression and reliance on opiates to function.

When you finally had sex -heterosexual sex, dick in pussy sex - it was a frenzy fueled by alcohol and weeks long of teasing, and you saw glimpses of his leg in the midst of it and he saw the scars scattering your arms, but beyond the “oh, so you tried to kill yourself” he said to you when he edged you on the brink of orgasm the umpteenth time (and oh, boy, was that a mood killer) there were no comments about either.

But he kept you around and you weren’t entirely certain of why. It’s only been a month or so, and he’s not calling you his girlfriend or telling you he loves you, but he’ll still wine and dine you before railing you. And you don’t know if it’s out of obligation, if he feels like even though you’re not a hooker he has to pay you for sex, or if he genuinely enjoys your company. You think about how dissimilar you are to Wilson and how that’s the only person he keeps close. You wonder if maybe you remind him of his live-in ex that you’re almost certain he never got over. It’s a good time though, regardless. You make each other laugh. You both love The Rolling Stones. You begrudgingly agreed to be dragged to a monster truck show one night (“Wilson won’t come with me” he whined) and in return you made him go with you to see a local band perform that he wasn’t the slightest bit interested in.

It was that sacrificing that made you pretty close to a real couple. Wilson pointed it out to you and he no doubt pointed it out to Greg. You made a snarky comment about his marriage and you wonder if you should compare notes with Greg to make sure you’re both not using the same lines.

You don’t know why you keep him around either, so it’s fair. It’s nice to have a fuck buddy, you suppose, and it’s also nice to almost like them as a human being rather than a sex toy. It’s certainly not because you think you can cure him, because you know you can’t. You wanted sex and you didn’t want a rehash. All things considered, he was a thorough lover and cared about getting you off as much as himself, which somewhat surprised you given how selfish he can be in other settings.

It’s not a bad arrangement. At least not right now.

But you’re fucked and you know it. It’s why you were drawn to work with kids in the first place. At least you’d always have a leg up on them. Someone out there thought you were sane enough to be rent an apartment and be a licensed prescriber.

Oh. Speaking of.

“Come on. You have a license to prescribe. Just once,” he begs.

“Yeah. No. I think you’ve got me confused with Wilson.”

“You’re much hotter,” he offers.

“Flattery will get you nowhere.”

“It got you in my bed.”

You smirk, shaking your head. “Yeah. Fair. But that’s as far as it’ll get you. You can be lackadaisical with your license, but I’d like to keep mine until I want to retire.”

“How’d I get with such a goody-two-shoes? Even Wilson will play.”

“He’s not now, apparently. What gives?”

“I bet Cuddy clinic hours that I wouldn’t take Vicodin for a week. They’re all convinced I’m an addict.”

You snort. “Okay. I hate to point it out so bluntly, but this is prime behavior for addiction. Searching all channels to get a fix because you can’t go a week without it?”

He rolls his eyes. “Yeah. Okay. I’m going to do the week. But I need someone on standby. I’m only doing the week, and I don’t know that I’ll be able to get it prescribed afterward.”

“Chronic pain is outside my scope of practice. Best I could do is a suboxone MAT and say I’m detoxing you off Vicodin and keeping your substance use in check, but even that’s pushing it. There’s a conflict of interest.”

“You can’t keep the clinical and the personal separate?”

“Nope. Could you? If I was your patient this week, would you be able to? Bringing your ex-girlfriend into this is what got you into this mess. Don’t bring me in to try to fix it.”

“I’m not asking you to fix it. And you have a medical background. I’m asking you to write the order I’m asking for. I know how to manage my pain.”

“Why don’t you get through this week first? Then maybe you’ll take me up on the suboxone,” you say, crossing your arms.

“You think I’m addicted?”

“Jesus Christ, Greg, you’re smarter than this. You know what happens if you consistently take opiates. I know you need them for pain. I’m not denying that. But to think you’re immune to the side effects? It’s habit-forming. You know this. You’ve been taking it for years. You’re going to have withdrawal symptoms. You should be doing this in a detox facility if anything.”

“I work in a hospital. Opiate withdrawal never killed anyone, anyway,” he says, seeing no point in bluffing to you any longer.

“Maybe not. But you’ll suffer. I’ll meet you halfway, hm?” You say, looking up at him. “I’ll prescribe you comfort meds for the week. Ease you through it. Mirapex, vistaril, zofran, clonidine, bentyl…”

“Most of those aren’t exactly in your scope. If you want to be technical.”

“If I lose my license for any of those the board has far too much time on their hands. But you’re right. I’ll get Chase to sign them off.”

“Chase?”

“He’s the most desperate to get laid out of the three. I bat my eyelashes enough he won’t even question who the scripts are for.”

“Chase? Look at him. If he’s not getting laid none of us should be.”

You scoff. “I guess pretty boys do it for you, but not for me. But no…I can tell. He reeks of desperation.”

“It’s desperation to be liked by authority. Not desperation for pussy. He’s swimming in it.”

“Okay. We’ll see if he folds,” you say, winking.

Greg sighs. “Is this some kind of game?”

“What isn’t, with you? It’s all games, it’s all puzzles.”

“Why Chase?”

“I told you. I know you’d rather me go to Cameron, but unfortunately, I don’t think flirting would get very far with her. Foreman will never fold.”

“You don’t have other doctors you work with you could ask?”

“Greg, it’s just fucking comfort medications that you probably will have too much pride to even touch. Again. Not risking my career for you and letting people that actually respect me think I’m a nutcase because I slept with you.”

“So… you want to fuck Chase. Right?”

“Where in that insecure little man brain did you think of that? It’s your other head, right? I must want the sexy Australian because all the other girls are doing him? Because I want to ask him to prescribe meds? For you?”

He shrugs. “Matter of time. ‘Oh, I had to blow him, that’s the only way I could get him to do this’ or ‘oh, honey, good news, he said if I sleep with him three times a week he’ll prescribe your Vicodin’.”

“Stop with the immature bullshit. If I wanted to fuck him, I’d just leave you, not worry about the meds, and do it. Grow up, Greg,” you mutter, walking away.

“Then why don’t you?” he challenges, hating himself as the words leave his mouth, hating how unattractively juvenile he was coming across. But there were reasons, the need to push you away to see if he would get pulled back, the need to be contrary, the need to know. Know what, exactly, he’s not sure.

He already knows he’s in for one of the worst weeks of his life. Even if the withdrawal symptoms are mild, he’s going to be in terrible, unmanageable pain, and all the Tylenol and Motrin in the world aren’t going to even come close to touching it. And he’s going to be more miserable than usual. No pain relief. No euphoria from the high when he takes just one… or two… or three extra than he needs. He knows he’s addicted. He tries to roll it off his back, saying it doesn’t matter, it shouldn’t change perceptions of him, it’s something he needs for pain, and it doesn’t affect his ability to practice medicine.

But sometimes he’s afraid. When James looks at him in concern but doesn’t offer any solutions because there aren’t any real ones, are there? He needs opiates for pain. Nothing else will work. Whether it’s pure heroin or your gold-standard synthetic hippy bullshit medication-assisted treatment… it’s still an opiate. Naloxone embedded in the pill or not. Having to go to a clinic to get dosed and having to have checks and balances on his use or not. It’s still an opiate. There’s still a stigma. It still pinpoints his pupils, lowers his respiratory rate, and hopefully, hopefully, takes the edge off so he can function but he knows. Addiction isn’t his specialty, he never wanted it to be, but he knows. One day it’ll be his last Vicodin, or the Vicodin won’t work anymore, and hey, you know what’s instantaneous? Spinal morphine. Can only use that card once or twice, have to tell Wilson he’s in excruciating pain and guilt him into enabling. He’ll only go so far. And then…well, then it’s IV heroin or fentanyl, whichever is easier to get, whichever is cheaper.

Greg knows that addiction treatment centers are revolving doors. He knows that you saw the same people back and forth and back and forth sign in and sign out, sign in and sign out. Change their medication plans a million times. And some of them still died anyway.

He’s afraid. He’s afraid of dying by his own hand by accident, alone and blue, nodding off forever. Sometimes he wishes for it, an end to the pain, but he also doesn’t want people to find him like that. A predictable end to a predictable story. World-renowned diagnostician died the same way a poor broke junkie did on the streets. Hooked on drugs, overshot it.

And it’s not that he thinks he’s better than those people. He knows he is those people. Even prior to his disability he dabbled in drugs, never enough to create a habit but enough to definitely indicate the potential of a problem. He’d tried almost every illicit substance “just to see how it felt” by your age. It feels good. Drugs feel good. It’s how they work. And your brain wants to feel good. It’s how they keep working and you keep using.

He knows. He’s in a vicious cycle he’ll never claw his way out of.

And you know it, too.

And yet you’re wasting your time fighting with him instead of walking away.

Why?

He doesn’t know that.

“Yeah. Why don’t I fuck him?” you snark back, turning on your heel and walking back toward him, drawing him out of his pity party and back into the misery he created for no reason other than to drag you down with him, make you choke on it with him. “I don’t want to. That’s why. I want to fuck you, although believe me, that thought is getting less and less appealing every time you open that fucking mouth and speak.”

“It does have better uses,” he quips, shrugging, almost visibly relaxing at hearing he was chosen, that he hadn’t scared you off yet.

You roll your eyes. “When does the detox start?”

“Now. It’s been a couple of hours.”

“So you wanted to kick it off and try to put both of us in a shitty mood to start with? Not your brightest idea, huh?” you ask.

He doesn’t say anything and you nod, feeling slightly more in control now that you rendered him silent without any arguments. “Go home. You can’t think clearly if you’re going to be actively detoxing.”

“I still have to make them think I can function without it,” he says after pausing. He would’ve lied to you too, put up a façade with you too, but that’s the thing about addiction. It’s easy to hide dependence to people who don’t know what to look for, but you do. And you would smell it on him.

“I thought you didn’t care what people think?”

“I don’t.”

“Then why take the bet at all?”

“I’ll get out of clinic hours.”

“Right. You would never do something like this to prove a point,” you say sarcastically, leading him out of the office. —————- “Why are you with him?” Chase asks. “And you care enough about him to ask me to use my medical license for a script.”

“You’ll see I don’t care enough about him to risk using mine,” you counter. “It’s comfort meds. Just write the scripts and I’ll leave you alone and we can go back to never talking, which is honestly how I prefer it.”

“I’ve done nothing to you.”

“Right,” you mutter. “I’ve heard enough, though.”

“Does he… what does he say about me?” he asks, a look between bewildered and terrified crossing his face.

You laugh, shaking your head. “Forget I said anything. You’re fine, I’m sure, I just don’t want to be entangled in the team. I already work with Wilson. One facet of House’s life needs to be separate from me.”

“Right. So you’re asking me to prescribe him medications.”

“As a doctor. Which is your job,” you point out. You sigh, looking at the pretty blond man sitting in front of you. Maybe Greg was right to be afraid. Most women your age would be begging to spread their legs at the thought of carrying this man's children. He's more stable, at least comes off that way, and he doesn't have an addiction and a crippled leg.

“Why stay with him if you know he’s an addict?”

Why are you staying?

You look at him for a second, reading his face. “You hate people that struggle with addiction, don’t you?”

“I wouldn’t say I hate them. I just think they don’t realize the pain they cause and it’s unfair to the sober people in their life.”

“Everyone is someone’s burden,” you say.

But why did you take him on?

“So you think he’s going to detox.”

“I know he’s going to detox. Which is why. Once again. I’m asking you to prescribe him comfort medication for the aforementioned detox.”

“You guys really like each other, huh?”

Why did he take you on?

“No. I want my week to not be miserable. This might lessen it a little bit.”

“Oh, and you’re deflecting just like he would.”

“Just prescribe me the damn meds, Chase.”

“You’re going to be miserable anyway,” he says, shrugging as he takes out his script pad. “You owe me one.”

You know he's not wrong.

“Yeah. You’ll get a psych consult on the house,” you agree.

“Why’d you ask me?”

You sigh. “Can’t ask Wilson. Too close. So it had to be one of you three. Foreman just wouldn’t. Cameron would ask me too many questions and she’d tell everybody.”

“And me?”

“Process of elimination, really. Thank you, you know," you say, deciding to leave out the part where he gets off on sucking metaphorical dick for the chance at appealing to authority. Sometimes you wish you were as crass as House. You come up with some good ones if you could only find the guts to just say them.

“He’s not going to take them.”

“Probably not. But I’m doing my part.”

“As what? His girlfriend?”

“His… friend,” you clarify, and you walk out of the office with the scripts in tow to fill at the pharmacy. Later you hand them to him and he takes them without a word. He opens all the bottles, takes one of each pill in his hand and he pops them dry. Terrible for his esophagus, you tell him, and he mutters something about how he’s wrecked his liver and everything else has to catch up. He opens a bottle of wine and you lean against his chest, barely processing the cheap soap opera flashing in front of you on the TV. He's already sweating, you can feel his shirt damp against your cheek. You don’t know why you’re here. You don’t know why he made a show of taking all those pills in front of you. Maybe to show your efforts were appreciated without having to say the words, even if he thought it was stupid. Maybe it was a desperate attempt to make this all suck less. Maybe it was because this was bending the rules a little, a detox with help, however minor, and he always wanted to see how far he could push before the consequences could roll in. Let’s cheat a little. Instead of a slice of pizza on a diet let’s have a hydroxyzine in a cold turkey detox.

He asked you to come over tonight but he hasn’t said much of anything or initiated much either. Why does he want you here? To know he’s not alone this time, that you’re willing to face the brunt of this pain with him when it returns, like Stacy was unwilling to?

You don’t know.

You don’t want to know. It’s best he keeps that information in his own head where it belongs. You don’t want to get too attached, too close, too entangled. This is fine how it is.

But you still wake up drenched in sweat that isn’t yours.

[valeria-garza-enjoyer]

Mx. Sinister

Valeria Garza x Fem!Reader

omg my first cod fanfic guys can i be apart of the club pretty pls :3

Oh you never seem to notice… When I follow you home

She was a normal, functioning member of society, she just did what was best for Las Almas in an… alternative way.

What can I say, drugs bring in a lot of money. A lot a lot.

Too much, she’s decided. She needs someone to spend it on, someone to spoil. It’s been nagging at her for quite some time, to find some dainty little bachelorette in her town and make them hers, to lavish her in the most delicate gold jewelry and finest silks. To make a pretty young thing her hermosa perra. Her vida, her amor, her florecita. Her florecita, who she’ll open up and make bloom, whether on her own or otherwise.

In the dark of your apartment… When you think you're alone

Finding her florecita was easy enough, she has ties all over the world. She could, quite literally, get anyone she wanted with enough phone calls and deals made. No, she wants someone local, someone she’s seen when she goes for her morning coffee. And she has the perfect idea of who to take when she overhears some phone calls she definitely should not have heard.

You.

Apparently, money is tight in the family, something something a family member is genuinely thinking of selling their girls into sex slavery or at the least pulling them out of school to work, something something more and she finds out you’re about to be kicked out of your apartment.

So she swoops in, slowly, like a leaf falling from the highest branch of a tree with no breeze to carry it.

What will it take? What else should I do?

She buys you your morning coffee and breakfast, making small talk. She thinks you’re absolutely beautiful, absolutely and positively hers. Her hands linger as she hands you your coffee and puff pastry, her cold and nimble fingers somehow comforting.

“Well, mi florecita, I heard there’s more openings in my cartel if it helps. I can make some special exceptions for you and your family, keep you out of the front lines. How does medical, or maybe logistics, sound, querido?”

You blush at the kindness of what is at least a stranger and at most distant friend, turning down the offer. Of course you turn down the offer, ever the sweet and caring soul. Too scared to “take advantage” of someone’s kindness.

How far must I go to prove… That I love you?

So Valeria doubles down, walking her to work after her morning coffee, making sure not a single mutt in Las Almas soils her florecita. Her closest men track and follow you like shadows and bloodhounds on a scent trail, learning your every move and routine.

So she just so happens to be shopping at the same time as you, talking about what would make a good dinner.

“Oh, well I haven’t had sushi in a while, but the one sushi restaurant is far too expensive to justify right now.”

Valeria’s eyes light up, and she smiles softly, grabbing the bag of onions for you.

“Sushi? I was going to go there tonight, why don’t you join me, mi florecita? On me, don’t worry about a single thing. You’ve been working harder than a mule, you deserve to take a break. What do you say, sweetheart?”

“I- well I… I mean I guess I can pay you back later…”

“Nonsense, there is no “paying me back later” chica. We both want sushi and you need a break. I'm offering, why don’t you just come with me?”

“Fine, fine Valeria! When do you want me to be there?”

“How about seven fifteen, seven thirty, hm? Does that work for you?”

“Seven thirty works for me, see you then, Valeria!”

“Of course, chica. See you then.”

And I'll get you yet…

Money shows up randomly in your purse, starting off small until you notice a few extra twenties padding your wallet. You think nothing of it, maybe you really are forgetting all the money that was in there.

But the extra padding in your savings account doesn’t go unnoticed. You had almost nothing in there to keep up with bills that you couldn’t pay from your checking, and now every time you check it goes up in almost indiscernible increments. You can’t tell anyone, it’ll sound like fraud or insanity.

But Valeria knows. She sees it in how you carry yourself now. You’re not on the brink of starvation or homelessness anymore, you order an extra large instead of a large coffee. You look in shops as you two walk, wondering if you should actually get that dress.

“That’s a pretty dress, no?” Valeria comments, noticing your gaze drifting towards the display. You nod a little, eyes drawn to the light sage green silk dress, stopping just above the ankles. Flowy like a river, form fitting and revealing in just the right places. You simply can’t take your eyes off of it until they wander to the price tag.

Oh. Even with the new padding your wallet and savings have, it’ll hurt. You smile and look away, continuing to walk with Valeria.

“It is, but I gotta save for it. It’s just a little out of my price range right now.” You reply dismissively, looking in other windows, noticing every stunning dress is just out of your price range.

Just know I'm not the sinister type…

So what else does Valeria do? She calls in an order for the dress with your exact measurements, tailored to every curve and inch of your body.

You see it in the corner of your eye when you come home from work one day, stopping dead in your tracks.

I never bought that dress… It was too expensive, it was way out of my budget! What the hell?

You look for a receipt, a tag, anything to prove you bought it. Nothing. Just the most eye catching and stunning dress you’ve seen in ages, sitting in your closet like the cardigans you wear every day.

You try it on. It fits like a glove, to your horror. Or excitement, you can't really tell. All you know is that the dress alone makes you feel like a doll, porcelain and precious. The silk hugs your curves, accentuating each dip in your skin and every soft crevice. You look at yourself in the full length mirror and blush, twirling around to watch the skirt of the dress twist and turn with you, buttery smooth and effortlessly elegant.

But I'll get you yet…

Valeria comes over some time later and smiles as she peaks into your room, seeing the silk dress in the closet.

“So you bought that stunning dress and just didn’t show me, let alone tell me? Aye, mi florecita, I must see you in that silk.” She chides softly, a little teasing.

But she’s got to see you in that dress. The dress she bought for you. The dress she broke into your apartment to put in your closet while you were away. The dress she thought of as your dress, no other person in the world could ever wear that dress. It belonged to you, was meant to be on you. She couldn’t have it any other way.

She’s not sinister. She’s desperate at this point. Her actions are not only motivated by lust, no, she just wants to see her florecita flourish.

“I… okay, just give me a minute, Val.” You mumble, pushing her out of your room and changing into the silk dress quickly. You smoothen out the bodice area, looking at your slightly protruding tummy. You’ve never worn this out in public, in front of anyone but the mirror. What will Valeria think? Will she think it’s ugly? Will she laugh at yo-

“Santa María, madre de dios, mi florecita…” She murmurs as she opens the door, her dark brown eyes boring into you. You look…

“You’re lucky I’d rather not crumple that silk, chica, or else I’d be ruining you for the world to see.” She whispers as she comes close, her rough hands landing on your love handles and squeezing them, rubbing small circles into the silk covering your midsection. “You look like the statues in Greece, mi alma.”

You look up at her and blush. She’s never been this… blunt… before. Never been this handsy or possessive.

But the facade is back up after she leaves. She simply let her mask slip when she finally saw you, dolled up and delicate in that silk. She couldn’t stop herself, she just had to touch what was hers.

She bought you the dress. And you wore it, for her and only her. You’re hers, she’s decided. No one else will have you. Never.

I've got to make you mine…

But her world crumbles a little and she sees red when she finds you flirting with a man, a man under her command of all things. She keeps cool, smiling and laughing, gossiping about him like you’re two school girls.

“Well, he seems nice enough, mi florecita. Just be careful, yes? Men are dogs, no matter how sweet they seem. They all have teeth and they have bitten before.”

“I will, Valeria. You know I will. I trust you with this kinda stuff.”

She smiles, coy and conniving, and squeezes your hand.

“Good.”

Just know I'm not the sinister type.

So she tracks this maldito cabrón down in the middle of the night.

He’s rather low in rank in her cartel, she’s pretty sure she’s never even seen or heard this pigs name until her florecita muttered it.

She really wants to take it slow and be the non-sinister woman you know her as, but when she sees him screaming at a woman in his house, she loses it.

She slips in the back window and sits in the corner of his room, pitch black and unseen. She makes sure her knife is unclasped and ready to draw, her handheld locked and loaded.

“Luis Sánchez.” She calls out, cold and annoyed. “What are your intentions with the girl?”

He sputters, looking for any weapon in his vicinity. Valeria laughs.

“I see why you haven’t ranked up a single spot in my cartel, Luis. After all these years you’re still stupid enough to leave without a weapon.” She gets up, stalking towards him.

He tries to punch her, but Valeria dodges. She kicks him, sending him to the floor. She puts her boot over his neck, pressing on his windpipe.

“Luis Armando Sánchez, born March 16th, 1992. Mother, Camila Araceli Sánchez, deceased. Father, Diego Manuel Sánchez, imprisoned for life, charged with first degree murder of Camila Araceli Sánchez. Imprisoned from 2008 to 2010, 2011 to 2014, and 2015 to 2016, all for battery and assault, third degree murder, and drug use. What are your intentions with the girl?”

He looks as white as a ghost, or all the crack he’s stolen from the cartel while working under her.

“If you don’t start talking in ten seconds you will find yourself in so much pain you will never be able to walk again. Speak, chucho.”

He blabbers some half-assed lie about his love for her florecita, his love for her personality over her looks. She grabs him by the collar and drags him into the street, kicking him in the ribs to shut him up. He can’t yell if he’s gasping for breath with punctured lungs from broken ribs.

“Don’t you ever lay a hand on mi florecita, do you understand me, cabrón?”

He nods his head quickly and panicked, terrified for the first time in his life. His jaw is forced open with her boot and he's positioned on the curb, teeth digging into the cement. He whimpers, saying a mumbled Hail Mary.

“Our lady of Guadalupe will not save such filth. Tienes cuerpo de cerdo, Luis.”

And then he screams, his jaw cracking as Valeria stomps his head into the curb. Teeth break and his jaw cracks, blood pouring from every pore on his face it seems. He cries out for his mother, the mother he didn’t even cry for at her funeral.

She stabs into his achilles tendons, severing them. Then she strips him, leaving him bare like the animal he is for some poor soul to find in the morning.

Maybe she is the sinister type, especially as she carves “cerdo” and “chucho” all over his body. He deserved it, really, for trying to soil her precious florecita.

Oh you never seem to notice… That my heart beats for you…

You come to her a few days later, sniffling. Luis broke up with you, how shocking.

“Oh, mi preciosa florecita, he broke up with you? I’m so sorry, chica.” She coos quietly, rubbing your back as you sit next to her on her velvet couches. You don’t even think to connect the dots that maybe she had a hand in his brutal assault.

“He was so nice! And then he says this isn’t working out and he won’t even let me come by to get my things! What did I do wrong, Valeria? I was kind, patient, accepting, I made time for him, I cooked for him, what did I do wrong? We both wanted to wait, I don’t understand…”

“Oh, mi rosa, no no no… you did nothing wrong. He was just a wolf in sheep’s clothing, obviously wanting more than you agreed to. I know it hurts, cariño, but it’s for the better. You’re so sweet, so beautiful, he doesn’t know what he’s lost out on.”

“You… you mean it, Valeria?”

“What do I gain in lying to you, pequeña paloma? I speak nothing but the truth, he didn’t deserve you and you deserve much better. Don’t settle for him just because he threw some pretty words at you and promised to pay for the first date.”

“Thank you, Valeria. You’ve got no idea how much that means to me right now.”

She smiles, soft and genuine. She lives to see you smile. Her heart beats for you and only you.

“It’s nothing, love. Just maybe come to me about a future partner next time before you say yes, okay? We can’t have you sobbing every month because another man decided you weren’t worthy of his time.”

“Oh hush!”

Your soft giggles fill the room and you slap her arm, rolling your eyes. She’s whipped for you and everything you do. She has got to have you.

So I'll open you up… And make yours beat for me too…

After your breakup with Luis, the gifts and money start up again. More twenties and fifties, even a hundred or two, line your wallet. Your savings is alarmingly large, it wasn’t even this big before your family fell into trouble. You don’t question it anymore. If someone wants to help you pay your bills, by all means, go ahead!

Large bouquets of your favorite flowers show up at your desk and front door, notes mostly blank besides the occasional “Love you”, “♡︎”, or “Flowers for the beautiful flower”. The last note should alarm you, make you realize that this is Valeria slowly circling in on you, her prey, but you can’t help but blush and ignore the warning bells when you feel so happy and sweet with every bouquet.

But the icing on the cake is when you go walking with Valeria again. The dresses catch your eyes once more, and one makes you stop and stare. A midi dress this time, a soft white with pastel pink apple blossoms on it, spaghetti straps with a bow on the back. You simply can’t tear your eyes away until you note the price tag, hissing silently. Sure, you may have the money for it, but it’ll be tight for a while if you actually bought it.

It’s in your closet two weeks later. You didn’t buy it, you didn’t even make a comment on it to Valeria, but she knew. She knew it was just like that sage green silk dress she bought months ago, that you could and would find a million different little reasons to not buy it.

“I haven’t seen that dress before, chica. Did you buy it recently?”

“Oh… u-uh, yes, yes I did, why? You like it?”

“I sure do, mi preciosa, but I think it’d look better on you and not on a clothes hanger. Try it on for me, won’t you?”

And how can you deny her?

You walk out of your room a few minutes later in the fluffy, flowy dress, soft white heels to match and a necklace you found in your jewelry box that Valeria definitely didn’t have a hand in getting. Pink diamonds weren’t cheap, but to see a chain of soft pink diamonds around your neck?

“Aye, mi florecita, just as beautiful as last time…” She groans quietly, gripping your love handles and drawing you close, burying her head in your neck and inhaling deep. That Miss Dior Eau de Parfum she got you doesn’t do any favors, only making you more…

Feminine. Floral. Precious.

She has to physically pull away from you, rubbing gentle, possessive circles on your soft hips to stop herself from marking your neck up and letting every single soul in Las Almas, no, all of Mexico, know you’re hers.

“Thank you, Valeria… you’re too kind.”

“I only speak the truth for mi narciso” She purrs, cupping your cheek and rubbing the fullness with her thumb. “You are truly more beautiful than life itself in this dress, florecita.”

And I'll get you yet… I've got to make you mine… Just know I'm not the sinister type…

She circles you like this for months, getting closer and closer, cutting out all the possible love interests in your life.

Then she has to cut out your family. Easy.

She gives each member of your family thousands of pesos to cut contact, to leave you isolated. She’s got the money, it’s no problem for her. Any rat in your family that demands more once she’s given them their share is simply… handled.

Valeria holds you in her arms as you sob, wondering why your family, your flesh and blood, cut you off so suddenly. You’ve been thicker than thieves with your family since the family business went belly up, giving almost every single cent to your siblings and parents to keep them afloat, even as you drowned.

And this is how they repay you? By simply texting you “do not reach out. We do not want a relationship with you anymore.” and blocking you? You’re not an angry person, you’re too sweet for that.

So you sob like a little girl who fell off her bike for the first time, wailing into Valeria’s shoulder, wetting her shirt with tears and snot. She’s all you have at this point, besides your job.

Until your boss calls you in.

Only days after your entire family cut you off, no more than a week. He tells you you’re no longer a viable employee at the company. They have to cut corners, and compared to the others, you’re just not worth saving.

So she’s once again sobbing in Valeria’s arms that life isn’t going her way. She feels like a spoiled brat, sobbing and wailing in her only friend's arms. She’s got expensive dresses, costly jewelry, and large, extravagant bouquets in her house, and yet she’s sobbing about how she has nothing now.

She feels like she’s wilting. She was given too much water all at once and now her petals droop, once tight and sealing her soft and sensitive core away, now peeling back to expose it to the mastermind of her suffering.

And I'll get you yet… I've got to make you mine… Just know I'm not the sinister type…

“Oh, mi florecita, mi dedalera, you’re far too beautiful to cry like this.” Valeria hushes your sobs, pulling you into her lap and rubbing your back. She places a delicate kiss to your forehead, as if she uses anymore force you’ll simply crumple into dust.

“You look like you’re wilting, preciosa. Too much stress.” She muses, combing her other hand through your hair.

“Just let go, mi alma… let me take care of you. You could move in with me while you get back up on your feet, hm? Free of charge, no strings attached. You just move into my place and relax, yes?”

You whimper, burying your head into her chest. It’s too good to be true, you know it. Nothing good has happened in the last week, why will this be good?

“Shhhh, mi florecita… when I say something I mean it, don’t I? I know what’s going through that poor head of yours, I know you too well. Come live with me, I’ll help you get back on your feet.”

So you move in with Valeria.

And I'll get you yet… I've got to make you mine… Just know I'm not the sinister type…

And she spoils the ever living shit out of you.

Soft pastels and pink everything. Flower decor and patterns, floral and fruit scented everything. She holds you close every night in the living room, petting you like you’re her treasured pet. To her, you are.

She’s won.

She’s got the prettiest woman in Las Almas in her lap every night, making her whimper and blush at the soft touches and praise she lavishes her in. She’s got her dainty little bachelorette to spoil rotten.

Valeria takes you shopping every weekend, buying you the frilly dresses you want right there and then, an arm wrapped around your waist possessively in every store. She watches your eyes dance across the mannequins, stopping at the one to the left.

She knows that look. She leads you to the mannequin, rubbing the fabric of the dress in her fingers, bringing it up to you.

“Is this one calling you, mi florecita? I can see why, it’s calling me, too. I think you’d look good in all three colors, but the pink and cream one just…” She squeezes your waist, sighing.

A beautiful evening gown, floral print. Slit up the thigh, fluffy layers, Sweetheart neckline, puffy short sleeves. Oh, it would go so well with the lingerie she just bought you in the previous shop, pastel pink lace with a few small bows.

“I like the pink and cream, too, Val…” You mumble into her side, shy and quiet. The thought of being so… dolled up, after losing everything, is still weird to you. But the dress and the lingerie, the new perfumes and necklaces with matching bracelets and rings she showers you in make it hard to decline.

Valeria smiles down at you, kissing your forehead and caressing your hip. She custom orders the dress in shop, knowing your measurements by heart. You wonder when she learned your sizes…

And I'll get you… I'll get you yet…

“Come on, mi peonía, let's get home before the rain starts. I would hate to see my little flower so cold and pouty” She croons over you, guiding you out of the shop. You didn’t even get a chance to look at the price tag of the dress, she just bought it without blinking.

At home, you curl up in her lap, sighing softly as rain pelts the roof. She pets over your entire body, starting at your hair, going down your spine, and going back up to start again.

She was never sinister. She just wanted her precious florecita. And she has that now.

“Mmm… mi alma, you look so beautiful like this, all curled up in my lap. Like you belonged here all along…”

She rubs your hip, kissing your forehead as she does so. So affectionate, so soft. Your mind is constantly fuzzy and slow from the amount of praise she lavishes you in, unable to question any of her words or actions.

“I'm so happy you came to me so willingly, let me in so easily. You’re far too trusting, mi narciso. And that’s what I love and hate about you. It scares me how easily you trusted what’s his name… but you trusted me so easily, and look where we are. Is it really such a bad thing?”

I've got to make you mine… Just know I'm not the sinister type.

I do plan on making a part two (smutty) but idk when :3 posted to ao3 first

have fun !!

[soo8inz]

six — "he obviously has impeccable taste in art if he was looking for your paintings."

"do you like choi yeonjun."

"sure. he's nice and funny, and is a really good model when i need references."

"no i mean do you like him, like are you romantically interested in him?", y/n almost choked on her own saliva at this inquiry. did she give off vibes that she liked him? oh god what if he thought she was interested in him and it made everything awkward?

"no?? i don't like him like that.", ryujin just cocked her eyebrow, as if she wasn't sure to believe her or not. y/n huffed and rolled her eyes, setting down her charcoal pencil.

"i don't like yeonjun like that. and why would you care anyways.", y/n winced internally at how she sounded at the end.

"because it's been a while since... you know, your last relationship."

how could she forget? her previous relationship felt like something out of those cheesy dramas she watched, until it ended in a shitshow that would put reality tv shows to shame.

"honestly ryu, these courses don't leave much time to socialize, and at this point i'm just trying to graduate.", y/n picked up her pencil again and resumed sketching the reference the professor left from the previous class. two small pumpkins, an antique looking teapot and a cloth wrinkled up around the items.

truthfully, anyone could make time to socialize outside of school, but y/n tended to have tunnel vision when it came to school and in turn that left her with minimal time to hang out outside of school. it was a blessing that ryujin would track her down sometimes to make sure she was still alive and a functioning member of society.

"so there's really nothing there?? at all??? nothing between you two???", ryujin kept questioning and y/n sighed, continuing to sketch out the pieces.

"listen, i don't know if we'd be considered friends, but he's a great help when i need a male reference and he's cool outside of the studio.", she kept her eyes between her sketchbook and the centerpieces, soft strokes against the paper as she tried to imitate the real world items onto her sketchbook.

"...is there something wrong with him?"

"what?"

"you know... is he like super self centered or something worse that you can't stand?"

"there's nothing wrong with him– why are you so hung up over this anyways?"

"because you spend so much time with him and talk about him a lot–"

"he's a reference model and i've only talked about him when i talk about my work. he appreciates the arts and has a good eye for it, that's it.", there was an edge in her tone. she didn't want to sound so defensive but the constant questioning from ryujin ticked her off more than usual.

"well is there anyone else that catches your eye?", for a second beomgyu's face flashes in her mind's eye, but just as quickly as it appeared it was gone, and she was left a tad bit confused.

"there's someone.", ryujin spoke, breaking y/n out of her thoughts. she furrowed her brows and looked at her like she was crazy.

"i didn't even answer."

"but you made a face and spaced out for a bit, there's definitely someone that came to mind!"

"it was like 2 seconds–"

"2 seconds too long, you always answer immediately."

"you know your attention to detail is irritating sometimes, right?"

"and you love me for it."

"unfortunately.", y/n turned back to the sketchbook in front of her. she put too much of her attention to the cloth splayed in front of her that it looked out of place with the pumpkins and teapot. oh well, it's not like it's an actual piece she had to show off.

"so... who is it."

"who?", y/n asked, playing dumb while she started to put her things away in her bag.

"whoever made you stop sketching for a couple seconds. you know you were really into it i'm surprised you stopped."

y/n stayed silent for a bit, hesitating. she knew ryujin only had good intentions but she also didn't want her to think she was head over heels for someone whose existence she didn't know about until a couple of days ago.

"beomgyu."

"choi beomgyu? the photography student??"

"you know him?"

"i know of him, but yeah of course i do. his work is so good and from what i've heard he's a really funny guy."

"i've spoken to him once in my entire academic career, before that i didn't know of his existence, but he's friends with yeonjun so he might be cool."

truthfully, the first time y/n saw beomgyu, she thought he looked so cool. he looked like he jumped out of the pinterest board of almost every single student that majored in some type of art form. light washed denim jeans with distressed rips on the knee area, a grey t-shirt that was loosely tucked into his jeans from the front. the headphones that hung around his neck and the case that most likely held his equipment.

it was simple, but he somehow looked unreal, like he would somehow fade away into a crowd if you blinked too much, or as if he was only a projection of someone ideal and he'd be gone in a second.

overall, she thought he was handsome, beautiful even. a little too much for her own good.

"i don't like him like that before you jump to conclusions, we've spoken once, that's it."

"you think he's cute, don't you?"

"anyone with working eyes would agree that he's cute." the word cute wasn't enough to describe choi beomgyu, he was beautiful, but ryujin didn't need to know all of her thoughts.

"i just wanna see you be happy with someone. i know you always say having your friends is enough, but i wanna see you happy with someone that loves you romantically. i worry your work will take up all the time in your life."

she understood ryujin's worries regarding relationships and how y/n tends to isolate herself when she's immersed in her work. she understands that platonic and self love could only satisfy a person so much before they start craving the type of love that only a romantic partner could give them.

but she doesn't really think a romantic relationship is in the cards for her right now. maybe ever. and maybe one day she'll learn to accept that.

"i know you're just looking out for me, but i just don't think i'm ready to get into a relationship right now.", there was a sadness in ryujin's eyes when y/n spoke, but she also understood that y/n's craft was one of the most important things to her. it's had her focus since they started thinking about their futures.

maybe that's why she blames herself for the downfall of her previous relationships.

"on a completely different note", y/n spoke up, the somber mood making her uncomfortable, "he said he wants to see the paintings of yeonjun i did last semester."

"the vampire ones? those are so good, i can't believe you said you weren't satisfied with them."

"when is an art student truly ever satisfied with their work?"

"oh shut up, everyone loved those paintings they were the main attraction of the exhibit. and now beomgyu looked for you–"

"he wasn't looking for me, he was looking for the paintings."

"regardless, he obviously has impeccable taste in art if he was looking for your paintings."

"he probably wanted to see them because his friend was the subject in them."

ryujin rolled her eyes and groaned loud enough that it echoed in the drawing studio.

"why can't your ego always be at 100% and agree that everything you make is perfect and that you're an art prodigy like every pretentious asshole?"

y/n shrugged.

"my ego comes out when it wants to. now let's go, my stomach is gonna start eating itself if i don't eat something soon."

"convenience store run?"

"with our budget, obviously."

[papersparrows]

some days i just feel really tired and want to give up. so much i want to be doing but all my energy is being spent on surviving. and i feel guilty that i'm not always functioning to my fullest potential. i also feel guilty for having all these buried emotions that aren't very positive (suppressed grief, my ongoing mental disorders, deep sadness that's disguised as rage, the list goes on) because i'm now an adult who has to go to work and pay bills and interact with other adults and basically just fucking cosplay as a normal and well-functioning member of society and i play the part so well that i forget i have all these inner conflicts going on inside me. i bury them so well but some days they take over and i always get taken aback at how powerless i really feel. did i really ever heal anything? did i really make any progress? or am i just good at pretending i have everything under control? is this my impostor syndrome kicking in? am i worthy of good things? do the people i love actually like me? am i a good person, actually? will it ever get better? what the fuck am i doing with my life? most days i just want to rot in bed. but obviously, i can't.

[theleechyskrunkly]

VENT! Heed warnings in the tags.

honestly I’m so scared of adulthood. And exams. What do you mean that for me to be a functioning member of society I have to know how to find the area of a triangle and the mass of the moon? What do you mean one day I’m gonna have to wake up everyday, go to work, and realize 80% of what I cried over and what ruined my mental health in school is gonna be useless to my day to day life?

with the way this world works, I just want to live my teenage years at full blast (which I’m not allowed to) and then just die early. I don’t wanna live past 25 years of age because then I’ll constantly be haunted with the constant “when are you having kids? When will you mature? Do you have a partner? Do you have a good job? When will you become a lawyer?” And so on.

The school system is driving me insane. Why do I feel like if I don’t pass this math test I’m not worth anything? Why do I feel dumb, stupid, incapable of understanding what everyone is? Why do I feel like crying because I don’t have all As? Why is everything so tough to keep up with? Why do I have to study 8 different things everyday for years just to forget everything and work an underpaying job that will barely help me get through in this economy?

why am I, as a teen, already worrying about how I’m gonna pay bills in the future? How I’m gonna pay taxes, what career I should take, how will I take care of my parents when they’re old and incapable of working anymore, what I’m gonna do when they die, how will I take care of my sister?

i just don’t get why I can’t enjoy myself the way my friends do. Going out and having fun and getting good grades and being model students and teens in general. Why am I so different? Why am I locked up at home without even being allowed my phone despite being a good behaving daughter? I don’t do drugs, I don’t vape nor smoke, I don’t cheat, I don’t tell my address to random people, I don’t talk to strangers on the street, I don’t sneak out. So why is it that I’m such a horrible daughter? Why am I worse than my 24 year old brother in me mother’s eyes, despite him raping me? Harassing me? Beating me for years straight? Why am I worse that him just because I didn’t do the dishes or told a lie or used my phone for too long? Why am I always the problem? Why can’t I be allowed to make a mistake, once or twice?

why is it always me? Always always ALWAYS me.

i just don’t feel alive. Nor do I feel like living. What if we live and die and it runs out there’s nothing after we die. We just lose consciousness and never wake again. Then what was it all for? All the studying, the crying, the hurting. What was it all for? What is it all for?

[jjungkookislife]

Quarterly Fic Recs 2023: #1

Hello! I'm back with the first quarterly fic rec list of the year! I didn't read much these past few months but here are the fics I enjoyed!

Seokjin

Knocked @sailoryooons

summary: Living with people is difficult, but all things considered, your new roommate isn’t terrible. He cooks, he cleans, and if you had to be honest - incredibly attractive. But his habit of streaming until the early hours of the morning while yelling and making other questionable noises has pushed you to the limit. You’ve finally decided to risk your sanity and put it all on the line with a reckless bet in hopes of getting some peace and quiet at night.

Yoongi

Twirl For Me @gimmethatagustd

summary: You’re perfectly content with admiring your ballet student’s father from afar, until he discovers the secret of your second job when he pays for a VIP room at the local strip club. What’s worse is your new knowledge of his secret life that won’t let you get him off your mind, no matter how awful it is. 

Under the Ice @hamsterclaw

summary: You and your partner Jimin are part of an emergency evacuation on the Hope base in Antarctica. A crack team is drafted in to help. The only problem? It includes your ex-husband Min Yoongi.

The Window @kithtaehyung

summary: you get to spend the holidays in a lavish private lodge with your brother and all his friends. but you’re just really fucking sad tonight… and maybe a bit mad, too.

Hoseok

none :(

Namjoon

Baby Fever @wildestdreamsblog

summary: You were more than just a secretary to him.

Jimin

none :(

Taehyung

none :(

Jungkook

Cherry Bomb @milfgyuu

summary: You’re a cocktail waitress in a high end nightclub and you’ve been mutually crushing on one of the bartenders. Tonight, one of your customers oversteps boundaries and when Jungkook gets involved, you’re ready to toss your ‘no dating co-workers’ policy out the window. 

Because I Love You Ch. 7 @readyplayerhobi

summary: According to society, Jeon Jungkook should not be with you. He should be with a younger, hotter and thinner girl instead of wasting his time on you. It’s a good thing Jungkook doesn’t care what society thinks then.

The Art of Trying @venusiangguk

summary: you’re trying to forget jungkook, but he’s trying to make sure you remember why you shouldn’t. 

Love to Hate (Extra Scene 1: Jungkook's POV) @kpopfanfictrash

summary: Born with a silver spoon in your mouth, you've done your best to rid yourself of the taste since you were old enough to walk. Occasionally though, your mother manages to rope you into an obligatory function – or a blind date with playboy billionaire, Jeon Jungkook. Jungkook stands for everything you loathe about the world you left behind, but you can’t deny the spark of attraction between you. Intrigued by the promise of mutual satisfaction, you agree to one night in bed… and quickly realize you’re in far, far deeper than you ever intended.

Antidote @gimmethatagustd

summary: You know exactly how to make your boyfriend feel better when he’s feeling down, but he has his own plans.

Busted Again @btsgotjams27

summary: jungkook looks way too good in this outfit, and you need him to do some unspeakable things to you while in it.

OT7/Multiple Members

none :(

Seokjin

none :(

Yoongi

none :(

Hoseok

Good Teacher @here2bbtstrash

summary: hoseok teaching reader to suck dick ft. a serious virginity kink

Let's Put On a Show @/readyplayerhobi

summary: Welcome to HopeWorld! Lay back and enjoy a show with BehindTheScene’s number one dominant camboy, Hope! Are you looking for a Master to make you whine? A Sir to make you beg? Or a Daddy to treat you right? Hope’s got something for everyone...

Flower ^

summary: You finally decide to take a dip into the world of online dating and find the Flower dating app. One of the top matches for you proves to be a guy who looks to be your complete opposite; tattooed, pierced, a metalhead and oh…incredibly handsome. What happens when you throw caution to the wind and reach out to him?

Peppermint ^

summary: Achieving your dream job is something that very people manage to do, which is why you’re all the more happier when you land a job on the film team at Poppin’ Culture; the biggest pop culture website, blog and YouTube channel around. What you don’t expect however, is to fall for the exceptionally shy and awkward colleague who is not even remotely your type. Or is he?

Transference @dark-muse-iris

summary: Prolonged periods of work-related stress bring you to a crossroads in your life that leaves you prone to make impulsive decisions. During a routine visit to the local bakery, you stumble upon an intriguing business card belonging to a "tantric therapist" and take a risk. When you discover your therapist is an attractive young man with a penchant for shibari, you throw caution to the wind as he helps guide you to self-recovery.

Gone Wild @johobi

summary: Hoseok consumes porn like he does Cheetos: in unhealthily large amounts. He’s seen, and jacked off to, most things imaginable. But there are those photos that always draw him back…

Namjoon

Leave No Trace Behind @yoongiphoria

famous!namjoon x gn!reader

Jimin

I Can Do Better @here4btsfics

summary: Your boyfriend of two years just dumped you and you're angry and sad. So get hammered with your coworker at his place and eat bad food and watch trash TV. Which leads to some interesting conversations.

Taehyung

Daydreaming @hisunshiine

summary: Give me all of your love, gimme something to dream about. KTH is your favorite camboy, and as a loyal subscriber, you are chosen to test out some new features on the platform he uses to go live. He’s really good at selling his viewers a dream, and as a thanks to a new milemark he’s hit on the platform, he’s choosing one winner to get their fantasy scene. 

Late Night Talking ^

summary: ‘we’ve been doing all this late-night talking about anything you want until the morning, now you’re in my life, i can’t get you off my mind.’ KTH is your favorite camboy, & you’ve just been chosen as the winner of his contest. The winner gets to have their fantasy play out, with a twist and a gift...the platform is testing a new ability to allow the content creators to also see their subscribers in real time. 

Cinema ^

summary: i guess we’re in time, if you’re getting yourself wet for me. KTH is your favorite camboy, & after winning a contest, the two of you have grown closer and gotten to know each other after a one-on-one session. After realizing you live in the same city, he asks to meet you—IRL.

Jungkook

The Ex Text @kookdiaries

summary: The 2 AM texts have started again, and despite wishing to forget him, you’ll never have anyone as good as your ex.

Because I Love You Ch. 8 @/readyplayerhobi

summary: According to society, Jeon Jungkook should not be with you. He should be with a younger, hotter and thinner girl instead of wasting his time on you. It’s a good thing Jungkook doesn’t care what society thinks then.

Lucky, Lucky Girl @kth1fics

summary: The joy of Jungkook having a grand ol’ time with his own personal karaoke night causes you, his roommate, to grow more and more annoyed.

Love to Hate (Extra Scene 2: Jungkook's POV) @/kpopfanfictrash

summary: Born with a silver spoon in your mouth, you've done your best to rid yourself of the taste since you were old enough to walk. Occasionally though, your mother manages to rope you into an obligatory function – or a blind date with playboy billionaire, Jeon Jungkook. Jungkook stands for everything you loathe about the world you left behind, but you can’t deny the spark of attraction between you. Intrigued by the promise of mutual satisfaction, you agree to one night in bed… and quickly realize you’re in far, far deeper than you ever intended.

Red-Handed @bangtanstanst

summary: Two lessons learned today: patience is a virtue, and fitting rooms are much less private than you thought.

On Mute @yoon-kooks

summary: You always assumed your handsome coworker was down to fuck anyone in the office except for you. He always assumed you weren’t interested in a guy like him. And both of you were content with never admitting your feelings… until he unknowingly confided in you in the realms of a certain tactical FPS game.

Micro-orgasm @dovechim

summary: biology lab takes an entirely different spin when you find something unexpected in your cheek cell sample. 

OT7/Multiple Members

Before I Leave You Ch. 47 @hollyhomburg

summary: A visit to Namjoon’s hospital to get tae on some gender affirming hormones (good girl juice) leads to some…surprising developments. “You can’t just say ‘addictive slick’ and expect us to be on board with it!?”

Seokjin

9 Months to Fall In Love Ch. 21 Ch. 22 Ch. 23 @floralseokjin

summary: It seems like everyone around you is either already in love, or in the process of falling, and while normally you couldn’t give a damn, finding out the co-worker you’ve had a teensy crush on is dating someone else at the office seems to sucker punch you right in the gut. It’s stupid, and you’re irritated at yourself, but you can’t seem to shake out of the funk you’ve fallen face first in. Feeling lonely and heartsore, and mad for no reason, during drinks with your best friend you spot a man at the bar. Tequila confident, you make your way over to the stranger, and successfully one thing leads to another. The next morning you leave before he’s woken up, feeling satisfied in one way, but still as discontented as ever. Telling yourself it was an inebriated mistake, you quickly try to forget about it. Only, three weeks later that night comes back to haunt you – in a very unescapable way…

Yoongi

Ego: Hoe Chronicles @suga-kookiemonster

summary: he was messing with you again. he was messing with you, trying to get a reaction out of you simply for his own amusement. but you refused to give it to him—refused to give him the satisfaction of playing right into his hands.

Three Tangerines @/kithtaehyung

summary: throughout high school, you sometimes caught glimpses of your brother’s older friends: some of them were sweet, some of them were smart. but the one closest to him? that guy was a total f*ckboy from day one. after a foray of horrid relationships spanning years - ending with one that broke up with you for an alarming reason - you needed advice on what the hell you were doing wrong… and this wasn’t a conversation for anyone sweet or smart.

Summer BBQ ^

summary: the summer cookout at your place is fun as hell despite the way you have to avoid yoongi looking like sin incarnate. but when he gets asked an unavoidable question, you suddenly feel exposed. and very, very cold. 

Fortuitous @underthejoon

summary: Your fates were sealed long before your paths crossed. Get your diploma and get married. You were similar in that way – both bound by outdated customs. Falling in love was never something either of you dared to dream about. Until it happened.

Of Fire and Love @/hollyhomburg

summary: When Dragon Yoongi finds baby Jungkook in the wreckage of a house he burned down, he can’t bring himself to kill the child. Months after someone drops off a baby at your door, you start to notice something- or someone, lurking at the edge of the woods.

Sweetener @taegularities

summary: You used to know how he sounded when you were wrapped around him, but circumstances have pulled you apart and sent you scattering in opposite directions. Feelings shouldn't reappear so easily by simple words, but when you find yourselves in the same place once again, this is exactly what happens.

Take Five @jiminrings

summary: dr. min yoongi’s a board-certified dermatologist; skilled, renowned, and in-demand — oh and also, he’s divorced. alternatively, you’re yoongi’s nurse and you have a crush on him, and he gives you five chances to ask him out — he never said anything about accepting though.

Insemination Wars @prolixitae

summary: getting pregnant isn’t an easy feat, especially when balancing work and a stubborn husband. a chronological compilation that highlights the trial and error of good old-fashioned baby making

Crescent Bound @parkhabits

summary: Being a transfer student in the middle of the term was no one’s ideal choice. Maybe this time would be different, this time you’d try and branch out of your little academic bubble and create a social life, friendships, maybe even find love. It didn’t take long to figure out that Min Yoongi only associated within his specific group. Yet something drew you to him and him to you, however you couldn’t shake the feeling that there was something more to him. 

The Airdrop Incident @/yoon-kooks

summary: You accidentally AirDrop a racy photo of yourself in strappy lingerie to your hot and arrogant neighbor Min Yoongi.

Hoseok

none :(

Namjoon

Make a Move @joheunsaram

summary: Your perfect summer bucket list was almost complete, except for one newly added item.

You're Welcome to Stay, If You Want @taleasnewastime

werewolf au

Jimin

Put It On Me @jimilter

summary: When you signed up to model your cleavage for a jewelry commercial, no one bothered to tell you it wasn’t gonna be a solo shoot. It’s unfair being blindsided and you want to protest, but A-list model and flirt extraordinaire Park Jimin’s steel-cut abs have you kinda tongue-tied. And then you get kinda too busy thinking of other ways in which you’d like him to shut you up.

Taehyung

Beautiful Dreamer @mikrokcsmos

summary: in which you’re on your honeymoon, and though you should be enamored by the sights around you – you still believe that your husband is better.

Ladybug @cupoftaae

Jungkook

Sweet Nothing @adonis-koo

summary: being a guest at the Jeon Estate after a mishap of being kidnapped and dragged into your brothers affairs isn’t all that bad. Truth be told it brings you a lot closer to the mobster and owner of the estate Jeon Jungkook himself. His two rules are simple, don’t cause trouble and don’t give him a hard time. Somehow you manage to constantly do both in the most endearing way despite being pregnant and waddling around most of the time.

T-Shirt @still-with-koo

summary: you wake up in your friend’s bed after spending last night partying at his sister’s wedding as his fake girlfriend.

OT7/Multiple Members

The Sordid Place Ch. 2 @nabiolive

summary: Namjoon breaks down and installs Grindr after his friends complain he is “terminally single,” despite never really being into hook ups. Jungkook is an old pro at the hookup app. Their connection is instant.

Collateral ^

summary: Your ex-boyfriend gets in over his head working for the local mafia, and Boss Min has come to collect his payment: You. But was it simply a matter of being in the wrong place at the wrong time? Or has he always had his sights on you?

Before I Leave You Ch. 49 @hollyhomburg

summary: Hobi has a bad day, you make it better.

Daydreams @euphoricfilter

summary: sometimes it’s nice to get lost in daydreams

[wwriothesley]

A person who gets a bit too close ( or they perceive to be close to him ) to Wriothesley will have the impression that he won in life. 

People would genuinely use this manner of speaking to flatter him, and he'd thank them politely and tell the one(s) that used this expression that he hasn't won- he fought hard for everything that he has now, and will keep fighting to help what he considers to be his home. He answers politely because he understands how this must look from the outside, and that the person is genuinely happy for him and thinks they're paying him a great compliment.

In their eyes, he went from a prisoner to royalty, from a nobody who has committed a nefarious crime into an atoned, functional member of society who has contributed the most to Fontaine's growth. In their eyes, the Duke has reformed fully, and is not feared from those who don't have a reason to fear him. To those who have met him, once they got over his intimidating looks, they'll admit to find him a polite and charming fellow with a bit of a dry humor.

Wriothesley's feelings can be summed up by this Game of Thrones quote:

I've lost a hand, a father, a son, a sister, and a lover, and soon enough I will lose a brother. And yet they keep telling me House Lannister won this war.

( Though, translated in italian, Jaime rather says ''They keep telling me House Lannister won this war. But then, why do I feel so cold inside?'', which I find it more fitting for this purpose. )

Wriothesley doesn't know his biological parents, and can't remember them, thus forgetting a part of his past. He has gone through hell on Earth, endured abuse and humiliating conditions of living, and the biggest realization of his life came when he understood that he had to murder his adoptive parents himself, as the law and authorities couldn't do anything to stop their crimes.

Despite all of his efforts to heal himself, there are the bad days; where he wakes up in cold sweat and has to pry the sheets that feel like an hanging noose from around his neck.

He dreamed, and sometimes still does, of the monster that was his adoptive mother screaming and begging him to stop as he drives the hunting knife in her chest, multiple times. How her nails dug long, by now healed scars in his arms. For some reason, he can't stop thinking about her last, incredulous words, ''you're hurting me.'' as if she never believed that retribution would come, one day, in the form of her oldest livestock specimen turning against her.

How his adoptive father simply crumpled to the floor as the livestock inched closer to him, step after step, no mercy in his eyes as the man in front of him turned from a cruel abuser to a whimpering mess of a man urinating on himself and begging Wriothesley to spare him. How he asked him why?, as if he didn't knew his crimes.

It's their disbelief and incredulity that left the biggest impact on Wriothesley. Both abusers turned into confused, terrified people begging him to stop and asking him why he was doing this to them- the human mind is truly something amazing, sometimes.

He still dreams about none of his siblings stopping to wave back at him, afraid of this blood-covered demon bleeding from the scratches on his arms and with ice cold, empty eyes staring at them. He knows that he had frightened them- but, some days, it weights on him.

There are bad days, when he'll be brought tea from the kitchen, a thoughtful gentleness from Wolsei- and he'd stir sugar and cream in with a silver spoon, a part of him afraid that it would reveal a poisoned drink under his touch. In the worst days, no matter if the silver doesn't darken and crack, signaling no poison in his tea, he'd pour it down the drain and, instead, choose to make up for his unseen slight by inviting the Fortress cook for an handmade brewed cup of tea, complete with snacks and tea cakes. Wolsei feels blessed, Wriothesley feels less guilty- and all is well.

There are days that not even Sigewinne's improised therapy sessions can help him- but then, he compromises by smiling in front of one of her Desolation Shakes, as he names them, and downs one down without a protest. Despite the taste, it does work and gives him a boost of energy for the day. He's also able to down a Mysterious Meal made by her without batting a lash, as long as she caters to him a bit and puts some roasted potatoes into it. He'll clean the box without a protest then.

Wriothesley hasn't won in life. The price he paid for later ''successes'' in life was not a cheap one by any means, and he had to fight for every single thing of his. He had to fight to survive and access the position that he's in now- he is now considered royalty, a title appointed to him by Neuvillette, who knows of these struggles, and that makes him feel better about it.

Sometimes, he still think that he has to fight- but he learned that this is just a thing about life: to fight is to feel alive.

[queen-of-writing-bad-things]

Henry Danger Reader Insert | Captain Man x Reader: SEASON 5

Episode 4: Thumb War Part 2

*mentions of spiciness present but nothing descriptive (that's for the next chapter :3)*

"Perhaps it's better to just forget. After all, I doubt we'll ever see them again..."

~One week later~

One hundred and sixty-eight hours. Seven days. One full week since the incident—and nothing much had happened. It should've taken longer to forget but like always, life in the Man Cave went on as it always did after a crisis, even if the crisis involved leaving two men to their fate in space. 

No one questioned the Thumb Buddies' sudden disappearance, not the news, not the public, nobody, which was kinda sad when (y/n) thought about it, but that was just the point. She wasn't thinking about it, no one was.

There was no doubt that everyone felt slightly guilty about leaving Joey and Mark to cruise in the rocket until the end of time and after returning from the scene of the crime, Ray may or may not have had to comfort his sobbing sweet girl as she waited for the gentle relief of sleep. She felt so bad but then the next emergency came in, and then another, and another, and another after that and before long, life was back to being crazy and hectic, so much that there was no time to mope about. Other people needed help and they couldn't do their jobs properly if their heroes weren't focused.

So, that was the story up until one week later. They'd talked, watched Dog Judge, laughed at Jasper up in Junk-N-Stuff, finally seen that room-com with Tod Higgledy-Piggledy like they'd said, and done other stuff amongst that—a lot of other stuff and the Thumb Buddies faded into nothing with no one expecting a sudden dramatic return.

"We have an emergency," Ray grumbled into (y/n)'s ear as he came to lay behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist—spooning as it were as she dozed through the afternoon and into the early evening. 

It was just one of those days after a particularly gruelling night full of challenging calls and rather than be a productive human being, the girl was much happier just to be a useless vegetable as she whined and snuggled deeper into the cosy sheets of their bedroom. She loved him so much, what did she do to have her tranquillity broken by such terrible news?

"Again? I don't want tooooo...." She whimpered, seemingly sinking further into the mattress as his rumbling chuckle evaporated into her hair, his lips tucked into the curve of her ear. He knew the feeling, the thought of suiting up again and losing sleep they didn't have sounded like hell whilst staying here in bed where it was warm, safe welcoming was heaven. But the journey to nirvana is never easy and they had a job to do that earned them that security.

"Come on, sweet girl. It's just a burglary, a nice, easy burglary..." The man encouraged her, running his hand down and over her pyjama short-covered hip as she zoned out to the sound of her breathing. Maybe if she fell asleep he'd just leave her here, but then again, she'd no doubt shock herself awake and panic about being left behind and that would start a guilt trip and then she'd get all teary and emotional from being tired and no one had time for that. Life was so unfair sometimes, what could she do to tempt him to stay?

"Stupid burglars, why can't they just buy stuff like the rest of us normal, functioning members of society?" (y/n) groaned as she shuffled to lay on her back, her eyes landing on Ray's gently smiling, stupidly handsome face and she couldn't help but raise a hand to hold his cheek. He didn't look mad or pissed at how she was stalling, rather he looked content, perhaps even torn at how he knew they needed to leave but the alternative of staying in bed with her was so much more enticing.

"Can't we just stay here? I promise I'll make it worth it for us...just me, you, no burglars, no emergencies, no restrictive uniforms...you know I put this pyjama set on for you." 

"As much as I would like that sweet girl and believe me, I would love to keep you in this bed all day and all to myself, you know we can't. We have to go," Ray told her gently, swallowing the lump in his throat when she deliberately pushed her chest up and towards his face. He allowed himself the luxury of trailing his hand over her stomach, feeling the soft cotton of those very nearly not-there pyjamas she was wearing just to seduce him. She might have planned it, he didn't know, but as his fingertips trailed over the exposed peak of skin just below her belly button, he was starting to find himself seduced.

"But Raaaaay....please?" (y/n) whined again, fluttering her eyelashes as she gazed up at him. Tiny hands took hold of his large one, pulling it up to his chest to grab and pull at the soft flesh there, yet another one of her methods to keep him between the sheets all day, but Ray was stronger than he seemed—or rather, his sense of justice was.

"Behave. You can call out my name and beg for me later, little girl. Come on, get dressed before I drag you out myself." He said firmly, ripping himself away with one final squeeze and a quick slap to make her jolt before standing up and off the bed completely. She looked wrecked and completely innocent at the same time; tired and sleepy, but with lidded, dilated eyes as she pouted at him and lazily swung her legs over the mattress and onto the floor. So much for her powers of seduction; which energetic bug bit him?

"You're so mean," She muttered, sending him a dirty look that was thoroughly let down but the mirth in her eyes, so he couldn't take it to heart even if he tried. He watched as she began rifling through the closet for the night's outfit. She'd only be wearing it for about ten seconds before they had to don their uniform but scarring Jasper and Charlotte wasn't something she ever planned on doing. That was a sight reserved for her doofus, no one else. 

"I promised later..." The hero smirked as he helped her reach one of his oversized sweaters on the top shelf, put there to help stop sweet, little thieves from stealing them when he wasn't looking. But for today, he figured she could have one since they had a simple yet arduous mission ahead of them and after leaving the warmth of their bed, she deserved something nice.

"Fine, later. But you need to call Henry and tell him to meet us there while I get dressed since you so rudely stole me away from the thing I love most." (y/n) told him as she grabbed a pair of plain, worn jeans, nothing exciting since her uniform would take precedent in ten minutes or so. It wasn't exactly in Vogue or likely to be seen on the runway but when she got a hint of her fiancé's cologne, it didn't matter - only the way he playfully furrowed his brows at her words.

"I thought you loved me the most..." Ray muttered in a pouty voice as his arms encircled her waist and pulled her small frame into his massive one, effectively pinning her between himself and the shelving of the closet. Didn't he say they were in a rush? Oh well, (y/n) didn't have it in her to complain, not when he nuzzled her hair out of the way and buried his face into her neck as he curled around her completely. 

"Nah, the bed will forever hold my heart, doofus...you come in at a close second, though," She teased, raising her hand again to stroke through his soft, brown locks as she felt his lips tweak into a smile against her neck. The bed was nice, but in her view, anyone with a brain could see that he was nicer, so if she had to, she'd sleep on damn rocks every night if it meant to got to wake up to still call him hers. Still, not all sappiness had to be public knowledge, right?

"Glad to know that I'm high up your list, precious girl. Although, you should know that you're number one on mine," He replied softly, pressing kisses to her shoulder, neck and cheek as her fingers twisted and clenched the denim she'd plucked from the closet, her mind trying in vain to stay focused on getting dressed. His fingers seemed more interested in keeping her undressed if their wandering was anything to go by, almost as if he'd forgotten the strict orders he'd given her only minutes before.

"You're so cheesy, Raymond...but I love you too, doofus. Maybe even more than the bed if you keep your promise," (y/n) teased, squealing when tickling fingers met her rib cage. A glorious moment of serenity of love between them as she begged for mercy and he vowed to give it to her in exchange for a kiss. Even their hurries were slow when affection took a hold of them and with the excitement of his promise to quicken her movements, (y/n) found herself encouraged to move faster when he finally let her free...half an hour later.

~

"Hey? What's up? You triple-beeped me," Henry's little hologram said as it appeared above the machine in the Man Cave. Ray had kept to his word; he'd wandered into the main room whilst (y/n) got dressed. Charlotte and Jasper, who'd diligently spent the evening at work since they had nothing better to do and crime never ceased in the city, could swear that he seemed a bit more dishevelled and red-faced, possibly even sweatier than he had a couple of hours before when he'd sloped off to see what his sweet girl was up to but they decided not to pry. They frankly didn't want to know the details of that can of worms.

Back to the call, though, Ray couldn't help but instantly forget the urgency they needed for their response to the call, not when he saw what the boy was wearing. Had he mistakenly thought it was Halloween or something? 

Screw stopping the burglary, he just wanted to stand there in his stupidly tight, hot shirt (another one of (y/n)'s favourites but weren't they all?) and chuckle because there he was; Kid Danger, the almost fully grown, mature, somewhat cocky sidekick of Captain Man was stood on his porch wearing the most adorable sailor suit he'd ever seen. Oh, he wished he had a camera right now because this was comedy gold.

"Well, ahoy-there, Sailor Danger!" Ray cackled like a hyena on laughing gas as he took in the outfit, right from the jaunty cap to the neckerchief to the braces and the strangely high, navy shorts. Oh, he looked so dumb, he couldn't help but grin and mock.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know, I'm in a silly sailor suit. Now, will you tell me what's up?" Henry laughed along with him because if you can't beat them, join them and all that, even if his voice was notably drier. It's not like he wanted to do this, no, he was being forced by his frankly evil parents to play dress up for a frankly hideous photoshoot. Y'know, one of those awkward ones where the whole family recreates an old image that was horrendous to take even back then. He'd been having it rough...

"Hey, Charlotte, Jasper, get over here!" But, it was about to get a whole lot rougher. Not being satisfied with laughing at Henry by himself, Ray just had to invite his two best friends over to join in the mockery. Because everyone knows that one person making fun of him was humiliating enough. "Come here, you gotta see this!"

"No, dude, I don't want Jasper and Charlotte to see this, okay? They're gonna make fun--" The boy's protests came too late as his friends wandered into the camera's focus and immediately began howling with laughter when they caught sight of what he was wearing. Oh, yeah, it was hilarious, definitely not soul-crushing when they pointed and brushed away the tears that fell down his cheek.

"It's funny, 'cause it's humiliating!" Jasper exclaimed as they giggled and jibed at their friend. He'd pretty much hit the nail on the head there, so when (y/n) finally appeared from the sprocket, looking all cute in her stolen--borrowed--sweater, it made for quite a confusing scene. Her doofus, Curly and Char were all on the verge of tears, laughing their butts off as they talked to presumably Henry. Had she missed something?

"What's humiliating? What are we all laughing at?" The woman asked as she trotted down the stairs, her eyes glowing when they met Ray's, the same for him. You could see the moment when they saw each other, it was like something sparked inside of them and they unknowingly straightened up and forget about anything and anyone else. How could he focus on something other than how adorable she looked in his clothes? An impossible task if you asked him.

"Oh my god, sweet girl, you have to come and look at Henry! He looks so funny!" The hero held out his arm towards her, encouraging her to hurry into his embrace so she could see what he was talking about. (y/n) shuffled across the floor, eager to get back into his arms after being out of them for a full fifteen minutes or so and once she was safely back in his embrace, her eyes fell on the hologram. A snort escaped her before she could stop it and not wanting to offend the teen, she cackled. Uncontrollably. So much for not offending.

"Oh, Jesus---you lo--look like the deflated version of t-the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man--a-and I'd s-say sorry, but I'm no-not." The woman gasped between laughs as she clutched Ray's shirt for dear life. There was a real danger that if his strong arms didn't stay arm her waist, she might just fall over from laughing too hard or she might just forget to breathe - one of the two. 

"Yeah, yeah, hilarious..." Henry rolled his eyes as he watched the couple shake with mirth. Jasper and Charlotte had gone back to the couch, shaking their heads and still giggling but out of everyone, he'd thought that at least (y/n) would be on his side. She was supposed to be the nice one, the one who nipped Ray's mockery in the bud before it got out of hand but now, she'd joined the dark side.

"Oh...Okay, kid, I'll talk to you later," Ray groaned as he blinked through teary eyes and reached around his girl to end the call. He'd been so busy laughing at the stupid sailor suit and practically hypnotised by the arrival of his sweet girl in that damn sweater that he'd completely forgotten the reason why they were all there in the first place and why (y/n) wasn't in bed like she wanted to be. What a doofus...

"What? Dude, no, you triple-beeped me!"

"Oh, right, uh...there's a burglary happening right now at the fuel factory on Winchester," Ray reported as he snapped back into his mission mindset. Right, work now, play later...and he intended to keep that promise on "later". Why work when you can't reap the reward? Especially if the reward was as sweet as the one he'd be getting tonight.

"Ferris Fueller's?" Henry asked, his eyes glossing over how the couple floating above his wrist were practically glued together. Ugh, gross.

"Yep, got out of my nice, warm bed for this crap so you gonna meet us there in...let's say, fifteen minutes?" (y/n) suggested as she crankily screwed up her nose. She could swear her bed was calling to her like a siren to a lost sailor at sea but she ignored it, safe knowing that she had Ray to anchor her to their responsibilities. The only hiccup would be if Henry had other plans, although judging by the way she was pointedly staring at him, it was clear that he didn't have much of a choice. If she had to go, so did he; they were sidekicks together in this.

"Uh, okay, it's seven-thirty now--" Henry never got to finish his brief mental math as Ray had grown bored of the conversation and promptly reached around (y/n) again to end the call. Okay, a bit rude, but in all fairness, they had a lot of ground to cover if they were meeting in fifteen and if they were lucky, he might just be lucky enough to fawn over his fiancée in the Man Van if he was late. A rather enticing incentive to go faster if you asked him.

"Raymond, that was so rude!" (y/n), however, did not see it that way and dug her heels into the floor as he yanked her to the tubes. Why the sudden rush? He hadn't been rushing when he took the extra half hour to push her back onto the bed she claimed to love so much just to change her opinion on that. So, what had changed now? What could he possibly say to excuse the way he'd treated the kid so harshly? What could he possibly say to flip the frown etching itself into her face?

"The sooner we leave, the sooner we stop the burglars, and the sooner we stop the burglars, the sooner it will be 'later'," Oh, well, that'd do it. Her frown fell upon hearing him say that and it grew into a sly smirk. Oh, right, that's what he meant. When he put it like that, she couldn't help but hurry too, nestling into his arms so they could cram into one tube whilst she simultaneously tore the gum tube from her back pocket and threw a glowing orb into her mouth.

Charlotte and Jasper didn't want to know what had caused the change of pace, all they knew was that they shared a knowing look between them as they shook their heads and the couple blasted off. For certain, they'd be long gone before later even arrived.

~Ferris Fueller's Fuel Factory~

Again, why could they never go somewhere warm and friendly under the sun? Nighttime was firmly upon the trio as they snuck into the factory, which was like a ghost town...or rather, a ghost factory. All the workers had gone home for the night, so it made sense that the burglars had picked their moment now, but still. Something about the long, only hallways shrouded in shadow was just unbelievably creepy. 

Anyway, they weren't exactly hard to find. These burglars didn't seem to be the particularly intelligent type considering they'd turned all the lights on in the storage area where they were siphoning the fuel for themselves. Surely not a professional job then, just two amateurs who thought they'd try their hand at a spot of moonlight robbery. No biggie then for Ray, (y/n) and Henry then, right?

Well, you'd think that. Going back to his lessons on Crimefighting for Dummies, Ray wanted to make sure that they had the element of surprise when they decided to make their move and nab the burglars before they could make their mistake. That was when he'd come up with one of his greatest plans of the year--or stupidest, depending on how you looked at it. Wheelie bins.

How had Kid Danger and Miss Danger not thought of that? There were loads of them just lying around since this was an industrial facility, so naturally, using his brainiest brain cells, Ray suggested that they shoot holes in the bottom and climb inside. Pure genius at its very best. 

(y/n) wasn't particularly keen. Firstly, the trash cans smelled of whatever goop they made at Ferris Fueller's - something acidic and sharp that stung her nose and made her want to gaga, but she could get over that. She was a big girl and a funny smell wasn't about to get the best of her. However, she couldn't help but feel...dumb as she clumsily clambered into her plastic hiding spot with a little help from Ray, who she was sure had an ulterior motive when his hands landed on her ass to help push her over the high lip of the bin. 

Whatever, the point was that now that they were in them and slowly but surely wheeling their way towards those unseen menaces, she felt like a sitting duck. If it was hard to get in them, how hard would it be to get out? A very valid question in the heroine's mind, but it would have to be asked later because she had no choice but to keep her movements soft, subtle and mistake-free. Should those two look up from their pinching, they'd see three trash cans gradually closing in and if they had half a brain cell they'd figure something was up. Her tummy didn't like this, not one bit...

"--much fuel do you think we'll need to steal?" The heroes made out the hisses of their targets through the shitty plastic of their covers. Wow, they sure were dumb, who goes to steal something without knowing how much to take beforehand? Oh well, they'd dealt with idiots before, this was just a matter of getting close enough to pounce, which was made easier when the other criminal said something too warbled to understand. Probably muffled by the thick plastic.

As they inched just a little bit closer, holding their nerves despite the overwhelming pressure to stop and stay still, they could hear the sizzle of the fuel canisters disconnecting from where they'd been hooked up and then the clanking and chinking of them being roughly shoved into a trolley designed for easier transportation. At least they could say they caught them red-handed.

When it went quiet, they stopped, certain that criminal eyes were watching them. Not one sound or movement came from the three as they stopped breathing just to appear like a few unsentient bins left by some very sloppy workers. And so, when the thievery continued, they moved again, sneaking forward just a little bit like they were playing a stealth mission in a video game. Just a little further, just a little more, and...

"Reveal!" There came the big moment. Ray, (y/n) and Henry jumped up in the trash cans, pushing the lids backwards as they shouted, which caused the burglars to freeze at the sudden noise. Looks like they weren't expecting to get caught, a notion that caused Ray to smirk at his sweet girl as she stood in the bin between his and Henry's. Oh, how he loved to spook good-for-nothing scum when he caught them doing good-for-nothing theft. It warmed his heart like nothing else--well, there was one, very sweet exception.

"Stop what you're doing!"

"Yeah, quit it!" The man and boy ordered the criminals, even though they'd stopped grabbing loads of fuel the second they were caught. It was funny, there was an air about them that (y/n) found strangely familiar, but she just put it down to inhaling all of the crazy fumes whilst she was sweating in that rot box. A hand strategically placed in the small of her back brought her back down to Earth as Ray and Henry watched a shudder pass through their enemies, and it was her chance to give the orders.

"And turn around...slowly!" She growled, her harsh tone conflicting with the warm, fuzzy feeling she got when Ray's fingers briefly danced up her back. No, no, no, focus, it was bad guy time, not jump-on-your-hot-fiancé time. The men heeded her warning, not wanting to mess with Miss Danger because little did she know but they knew her, not particularly well but just enough to know that she meant business. So, very slowly and with their hands raised in surrender, they shuffled around, revealing that they were...mutant freaks.

"Ohhhh! What is that? Ohhhh, god! Turn back around!"

"What is wrong with your skin? You got a fat leg! Go back to the shadows, I don't wanna look at you! Please, turn around! Back up! Back up!" Ray and Henry grimaced as they took in the frankly hideous abominations in front of them. 

Jeez, they couldn't begin to imagine what these guys had been through but the outcome was horrible; one was covered with hair, literally, hair everywhere. His face, his head, his arms, his hands, his legs, every patch of skin was hidden by long, brown, shaggy hair, save for his lips and eyes just about. And as if that wasn't bad enough, it seemed that he couldn't speak properly, he just seemed to murmur in what could only be described as Wookie noise, which was probably the warbling groans they heard earlier.

His friend wasn't doing much better, either. In a similarly freakish way, his skin had been changed from normal to weird too; it was stained violet--a shockingly bright purple that didn't exist in nature, at least, not with. humans. His leg too went against nature's order just from its sheer size. Surely, it must have been three times the size of the other one, all thick and heavy like a goddamn tree trunk. 

Who were these guys? They seemed so scary and strange in a way that made (y/n) wanted to run and hide behind Ray's back, but when her frightened eyes met theirs, a spark of recognition lit up inside her. It couldn't be, could it?

"Hang on a second, doofus, hey, hey, hey!"

"Oh, I feel sick, sweet girl..." Ray muttered as he and Henry double over, dramatically feeling the bile rise in their throats at the sight of the mutant freaks. He was being such a drama queen that he didn't notice what she noticed, didn't connect the dots in the same way her brain did, although, he did feel the way her whole body went rigid. Why so pale all of a sudden?

"No, no, no, no, shut up! Look!"

"What?"

"Those guys!" He glanced at her with Henry, both him and the kid sensing that something was wrong judging by how she disguised her need to cling onto his arm by shaking him. Sure, she was a nervous soul but it was a rarity for her to get so scared these days and the boy watched as Ray forgot about his own problems and immediately switched to caring for her. He'd fight to his last breath to remove whatever was draining the colour from her face, but he might have been jumping the gun a bit too soon.

"Yeah, they're gross..." He muttered as she curiously looked at the criminals, swallowing the fear that threatened to push a whimper through her lips when their terror at being caught turned into two deep scowls. Jeez, they weren't taking the insults well but she could swear that there was something else too, something deeper, more like a burning hatred than a passing irritation.

"No, wait, I swear...I think they're the--"

"The Thumb Buddies! Ooooop!" Oh. Dear. God. How was this even possible? The Thumb Buddies smiled at each other and booped their thumbs together in their signature handshake-greeting thing before turning back to the heroes with rage and disgust painted on their faces and for good reason. The problem that they had written off had come back to bite them and they looked mad. Genuinely mad because their supposed friends had left them for dead. Shit on it...

"No way!" Henry gasped as the revelation clicked into place for him too. Right, those scruffy rags they were wearing were their old uniforms, he could see it now--he could see them underneath all of those freaky mutations, so the fact that they'd just gagged and retched in front of them wasn't a good thing. Still, it didn't stop him from smiling as if there was no bad blood between them. (y/n) wanted to hide right now...badly.

"Wait a second, we saw you guys get trapped in a rocket!"

"Yeah, get shot up into space!" The boys' lighthearted tone did not go down well with Joey and Mark, who glared even more harshly as their old friends mocked their pain. Did they not see the suffering they'd had to endure because of them? Maybe Miss Danger looked sorry but that wasn't gonna be good enough. No, she was in on it too and as long as her selfish superhero boyfriend and her cocky friend were grinning like Cheshire cats, they were gonna hate her just as much for everything they'd been through.

"Yeah, PS, why do you look like freaks now?"

"Yeah, I was just gonna say that!" Oh, they were asking for it. It must've been nice to sit at home and be loved as all your worries flew away. But perhaps they did have one thing to tank Captain Man, Miss Danger and Kid Danger for; thanks to them, they were now much stronger, stronger than they could have ever been before, strong enough to wipe those stupid smirks from their faces.

"Are you stealing rocket fuel?" (y/n) asked tentatively, still clutching at Ray's arm even though she did not need to gain his attention anymore; it was all on the Thumb Buddies. Why would they? Rocket fuel? They were supposed to be good guys, wannabe superheroes and the first thing a superhero should know is that stealing stuff isn't very heroic, but rather the opposite of what they fought to achieve. It just didn't make any sense.

"Yeah, that's right, we are. Jerks!"

"JeRks!" Joey's distorted voice sounded after Marks, causing (y/n) to recoil at their harsh tones as Ray and Henry frowned. Okay, first of all, no one scared their friend/sweet girl and got away with it. And second of all, why were they jerks? What had they done to cause such offence? Seriously, it should've been obvious but Ray and Henry were known to be a bit slow at the best of times and being blinded by a sudden wave of protectiveness didn't help.

"Jerks?"

"Be quiet!"

"ShUt uP!" They bellowed after their confused ponderings threw gasoline on the fires raging within them. It was enraging to hear them be lost on what they'd done to anger them. Didn't they know what they'd done? They were supposed to be friends and yet they'd been abandoned in their hour of need. Who wouldn't be angry? And to make matters worse, they'd returned as shadows—or rather, mutants—of their former selves, meaning they could never face their families or anybody ever again. Their lives were over and they knew who to blame.

"Okay...all right. We'll see who shuts up after we step out of these trash cans!" Ray grunted, suddenly feeling a surge of anger towards these idiots who dared to have a go at him and bare their teeth at his sweet girl. Oh, it was on, now all he had to do to connect his fist with their faces was to get—out—of—these—stupid—damn—trash cans! Wow, it was a lot harder than he thought considering how tall they were and how it hurt to dangle his legs over the lip. Perhaps using these to hide wasn't the best idea.

"Yeah, you guys are gon—you guys are going to jail! This is not easy..." "Right...you know what? Just shut up!" "Kid, kid, don't—stay in your—oh, god!" It really was quite embarrassing for them to struggle like a tortoise stuck on its back but it also provided great entertainment to watch for the Thumb Buddies, especially when Kid Danger, being the moron he was, lost his balance and toppled over into Miss Danger. Who then wobbled and they fell into Captain Man's trash can in a particularly annoying example of the domino effect, which left them in what could only be describe as an tight squeeze.

"We're falling in your can!" Henry grunted. It wasn't so bad at first; Ray caught his sweet girl with no trouble and with a little help from his super-strength, he was able to bring her into his trash can before she could hurt herself. But then there was Henry. The kid ruined what could've been a perfect setup for the couple, y'know, all cosy and intimate as they shared the tight space, but then he fell ass-first into a gap where there wasn't nearly enough room for him to fit. Intimate turned to intolerable and suddenly, for the first time in her life, (y/n) wasn't loving how close she was to her fiancé.

"Okay, that's bad—ow! That's my face, Kid Danger!" "We will be with you shortly!" Ray groaned as they tried to make sense of the tangle of limbs without accidentally whacking each other in the face. Easier said than done; Henry's rogue elbow clouted (y/n) in the jaw, causing her head to jerk back and bump with Ray's chin. Yeah, this sucked, the boy had to strain and cause a few more injuries just to shove his legs down and it was only then that he realised just who he was pressed against. Ew, get him out.

"Just push him out!" "All right on three, sweet girl. One, two, three!" With their combined strength, the couple were able to launch Henry off of them before he puked and luckily, he landed back in his own can, leaving with a lot more room. They didn't mind the closeness, they thrived off it, but that didn't mean they weren't planning on getting out shortly so the ass-kicking could begin.

"Move to the side—oh, this is impossible..." The hero groaned as they all tried to climb out, his hands lifting his girl's hips but to no avail. He couldn't get a good grip or the right angle, and Henry's boots couldn't find the friction they needed on the slippery, plastic sides of the trash can, so (y/n) did the only thing she could think of, which was still humiliating but hey, if it works...

"There's a very simple way to do this..." She muttered and prayed that her friend and doofus wouldn't be too mad as she shoved Ray with a surprising amount of strength, which caused his bodyweight to wobble the trash and to and fro until it pushed Henry's can over before it too tipped over. Well, they certainly landed with a thump but (y/n) had to admit that she was proud of herself just a bit. There would be no issue in crawling out now, sure, their egos were bruised but that wasn't a problem. Sort of.

"You're embarrassing us!" "No, you're embarrassing us!" Henry stared at the floor, hoping that it would swallow him whole as Ray groaned on his tummy before shuffling to his feet, helping (y/n) up in the process. That wasn't so bad, neither was his incessant complaining about how everything ached for five seconds and how they looked stupid, although that was particularly grating. No, the worst part was how he instantly patted (y/n) down in search of any injuries as if she could actually get hurt, and he made it worse by grinning and murmuring something gross. How did he know it was gross? Well, their noses brushed together and their cheeks flushed - gross.

"Stop fighting, both of you!" (y/n) snapped as the Thumb Buddies tensed for a fight, not that the heroes were gonna throw the first punch just yet. First, they had questions and the woman would be damned if she didn't ask them before her insatiable curiosity got the better of her. "Now...how did you guys...get so...y'know...freaky?"

"Freaky?!" Mark spat as she cringed from her poor wording but what other word was there? One looked like a big grape and the other looked like he was wearing a bear's clothing, that was freaky, nothing else. Still, at least she had Ray and Henry next to her as they glared, the former glaring straight back as they dared to intimidate his sweet girl.

"Would you prefer I use monstrosity?" "NO! It's your fault we look like this! That rocket took us into space!" Mark growled again, very nearly unleashing Ray's fury if it wasn't for the precious darling hugging his arm for comfort and support. He couldn't charge when she needed him, no, it was best for him to just stay put for now and plan on skinning that purple bastard and hairy freak later. No one scared his girl and got to tell the tale afterwards.

"AnD thEN OuR roCKet FleW pAsT thE MoON!" Joey roared in his new voice, which didn't make much sense to anyone apart from his fellow Thumb Buddies. For some reason, Mark could understand his kaleidoscopic tones and nodded along whatever the hell he as saying as the trio looked perplexed. Come again?

"What did Chewbacca say, Barney?" (y/n) asked bravely, trying not to let her voice wobble even though she found herself to be quite afraid of these men. What had been the start of a beautiful friendship was now a bitter rivalry and her tummy was telling her that these two were more dangerous than they were stupid now. After all, anger is an excellent fuel for power.

"Shut up! He said, and then our rocket flew past the moon...and right into a violent radiation storm!" "iT wAs ViOLeNT!" The men exclaimed, almost stamping their feet at the traumatic memory. Well, that didn't sound fun and (y/n) could understand why they were mad and the sudden, horrific mutations to their bodies suddenly made sense. Yeah, that titchy rocket wouldn't have had much protection in terms of radiation, so it was no wonder that The Thumb Buddies had been fried and misshapen into what they were now. 

"Which was what changed our bodies and turned us into mutants!" "WE arE mUtaNts!" That was an unfortunate side effect of flying through space with little to no protection. 'still, they were the ones who charged ahead without a plan, so, was it their fault? Even a rescue mission wouldn't have prevented that.

"That's why we hate you!" "YeAh!" Hate is such a strong, nasty word. Couldn't they intensely dislike the heroes instead? 

"Yeah--but—uh—" "Were not the ones who shot you up into space!" Henry protested for the three of them, trying to ease their consciences as much as possible, although some of the guilt would never go away, not fully. Still, innocent until proven guilty, right?

"We didn't know that ship was a rocket trap," Ray mentioned too, trying to keep his voice as civil as possible since these guys were getting quite agitated. As much as he wouldn't beat them to a pulp for making his fiancée tremble, he could hold his nerve and fake niceties. For now.

"So?! Still, after we got shot into space, you could've come help us!" "YoU NevEr heLPeD uS!" The Thumb Buddies protested, raising the strongest point in their argument. Even if they didn't know, Captain Man and his sidekicks could've scrambled a rescue team and brought them home, perhaps saving them from the horrific transformations. It certainly would've been better than crash-landing in some poor farmer's barn, as they had only before the robbery.

"How? What were we supposed to?!" "Guys, there's no way we could've gone up into outer space to rescue you!" Ray and Henry fought back as they too mulled over what could've been. A rescue mission sounded as bothersome now as it did then and even if it did seem mean, they still had the same mindset. Going to space to save them would've been overwhelmingly difficult, stupidly expensive and mostly foolhardy, the cons outweighed the pros and the incentive was to just let it be.

"YoU liE!" "That's right, Joey! You, Miss Danger and Captain Man went into space about a year ago!" Mark pointed out after Joey's deep grumbling, and as usual, Ray and Henry drew blanks. What were they talking about? Honestly, their lives were so hectic that it was hard to keep track of all the kooky shit they'd been through, so it was a good thing that they had (y/n) on hand to remember it for them. And how could she forget that day?

"You know, when we went to save those astronauts on the space station just after we started dating? When we rescued Colin from a horrible experiment? Remember? When we got home, I..." (y/n) whispered something in Ray's ear and suddenly, the inrush of memories caused his ears to flush fuchsia. Henry didn't even want to know what he said, too much knowledge could be the death of you. Right, the little girl, the bunnies and the evil space men, they remembered now. Jeez, what a thing to forget...

"No way—oh, right we did do that. That's true, that's true..." "Time flies when you're having fun, right, sweet girl?" Ray smirked down at the woman next to him, turning his back on The Thumb Buddies in a move that was both selfish and premeditated. He wanted to see her smile bashfully at how their love had grown into more than they could have ever imagined in such a short space of time. 

Still, they'd practically been living like a married couple for years, this was just them making those dreams come true, but Ray had one more trick up his sleeves. He couldn't shake his anger at how those guys frightened her nor could he see an alternate way out of here.

"Sure, doofus, whatever you say... Now, focus on...whatever this is," (y/n) lovingly stroked his cheeks as her eyes reflected the same adoration shining in his before. She gestured to them and The Thumb Buddies, signalling that she could listen to his thoughts, theories and memories all day, just not when they were stuck in the middle of a predicament. There would be time for tenderness later.

"Yeah, yeah, sweet girl," the hero quickly understood what she meant and tucked the silent promise into his heart, shelved next to that promise of 'later', "y'know, you make a good point. You know, when you're right, you're right and uh...you are right." Who was this man and what had he done with Ray Manchester? Seriously, did Ray Manchester just use the r-word with someone other than (y/n)? Wonders will never cease to exist.

"Tell you what.." "What?" "I'm telling them..." "Okay, I'm listening." Ugh, these boys, they were so adorably special sometimes.

"I suppose...we feel kinda bad—" "Very bad." (y/n) butted in, wanting to make just a small correction to that statement because she was certain that her guilt was ten times that of what the boys were feeling. Her poor, little, kind heart couldn't take the strain of knowing what they'd done through their omission, so if Ray was apologising, she wanted to make sure it was heartfelt, not half-assed.

"—Very bad that you guys got shot into space—" "And got turned into mutants" Another excellent point from Henry. That was the main problem, so it was only fair that they specifically brought it up.

"—And got turned into mutants. So, how about this? You guys just put the rocket fuel back where you found it and we'll just forget this whole thing happened? All right? Okay?" Ray suggested with a high-pitched, hopeful voice as he flashed his most charming grin at The Thumb Buddies, the one only reserved for (y/n). Jeez, how badly did he want their forgiveness? It wasn't a proper apology, not really since that man found them unbelievably challenging unless it was to save the pure, delicately precious love he had with his sweet girl but this was huge—huger than these vigilante mutants could ever understand.

"We could get some barbecue?" (y/n) suggested, also giving their frenemies her brightest smile, the one she normally reserved for her doofus and her closest friends. That was her "here's an olive branch, let's be friends" voice, the one she'd perfected after years of ghosting through school with only a few friends until she gained a splash more confidence during her final years in college. She desperately wanted them all to get along, perhaps if she and Schwoz worked extra, super-duper hard then they might be able to reverse the radiation's effect - long shot but not impossible.

"Yes!" "You like that, doofus?" "I'm totally down for some barbecue, sweet girl!" Ray grinned at his girl's suggestion, loving the thought of eating some decent food with her in a nice, quiet meal with her and Henry, his two favourite people in the world. Oh, right, and them, but still, fun! Ribs, smoky, barbecue chicken wings, soda, that sounded just right.

"You guys like ribs?" "Oh, come on, dude. Everyone likes ribs!" Henry chuckled and nudged his arm, wondering how anyone could dislike those meaty pieces of heaven, slick with a gleaming, sticky, sauce that rivalled a jewel with its sheen. Hot, sloppy and unhealthy, but hey, no one cared, not when it came to ribs.

"Yeah, but it's always polite to a—" "ShUt uPpPppPPp!" Ray's nonchalant comment was interrupted by the bellow that came from Joey as if their nattering was enough to make the volcano inside of him explode. Right, maybe he was more of a drumstick guy? Or maybe he found their uncaring attitudes and attempts to make peace infuriating. Probably the second one.

"Again with the shut up..." "So rude!" Saying that, though, Ray and Henry gave no fucks when it came to biting back as the only biting (y/n) did was instantly on her lip. She wasn't so good at being vicious, not without some serious provoking, that is, plus, something about the Thumb Buddies now made her shiver and once again step closer to her doofus whilst also keeping an eye on the kid. It was just her nerves, right? They were having a flare-up kinda day, right? Right?

"You guys ruined our lives." Mark did not mince his words as he seethed and stalked towards them at the same time, coming to stand close to Henry and (y/n) with Ray only an arm's length away. Wow, his skin really did look like an eggplant in the light, but what was a tad more concerning was how angry he was—practically constipated with fury. 

"Well, let's not be dramatic—" Ray smiled nervously and tried to play off his inner surge of panic by brushing everything away, including the man's harshness. They were alive, surely that was something to cherish. That amount of radiation should've killed them but it didn't. Maybe he could own his new fat leg and skin tone; perhaps Joey could become a shampoo model in hair commercials—he certainly had enough of the stuff to show off. However, that nonchalant attitude only brought another fit out of Mark.

"So, now, we're gonna ruin yours." Again, he didn't hold back on the malice, (y/n) and Ray barely had time to swap confused glances as Mark swung his fist with an impressive amount of speed and landed a harsh blow in Henry's gut—and as eye-watering as that blow was, it wasn't the only worry thing. A hidden side-effect of the radiation was revealed at that moment; Mark's hand jolted the kid with a huge surge of electricity, causing him to fly back and land roughly on the hard, cold, concrete. Sweet cheese, he was out cold and suddenly, chills of fear ran down the couple's pine. Right, fizzy punches, he could do that, okay...

"Kid!" "No!" They cried, their eases widening and filling with tears and they watched Henry's limp body spread across the floor like runny jelly smeared across toast. Before their stunned brain could even realise that their legs were moving, Ray and (y/n) found themselves kneeling next to his side, desperate to find out if he was okay as The Thumb Bastards clapped and giggled at a job well done. How dare they...

"Kid, hey, hey, hey! Talk to us, kid! Kid?" "Come on, Kid Danger, you have to wake up!" Ray panicked as (y/n)'s shaking fingers gently lifted Henry's head and lightly tapped his cheek. Nothing. His pulse was still ticking, it was still thrumming strongly underneath his fingertips when she checked, but even still, when she looked up and locked gazes with Ray, she couldn't hold back a few tears. He looked so afraid, she probably didn't ok any better and then Mark just had to throw salt in their wounds.

"I don't think the kid is gonna be taking a nap for a while!" "HwAhwAhwhahAwaHAhwa!" The newly evil men cackled as they cradled their fallen comrade, causing the couple to slowly look up with murderous glares. Henry was alive, but they'd hurt him, they were laughing at his and their pain, that was their first mistake.

"Did I forget to tell you that the radiation storm left me with a right arm full of electricity?!" "YeAh, yOu ForGOt..." Even in their darkest moment, The Thumb Buddies couldn't shake off their dorky personalities but this time, (y/n) didn't find it endearing or relatable. She found it irritating and heinous, just another log on the fire blazing inside of her as she gently let Henry's cheek meet the cool ground again. He was out of the count and it was safer to just let him rest as they wiped the floor with these assholes. And boy, the revenge would taste so sweet.

"No, I didn't! I just wanted it to be a surprise!" "Yeah, well, good for you, Mark. And I'm sorry for what you went through, really, I am, and if it wasn't for what you just did, I'd be apologising right now. But no one, no one, hurts Kid Danger and gets away with it, not even a little short-ass, hairy, grape-like maggot like you." (y/n) growled as she stood up from her place next to Henry, feeling nothing but an overwhelming urge to protect her own as the kid she'd watched grow up lay in a deathly state on the floor. He was just a child and they hurt him, so they'd see who was laughing when Miss Danger came out to play.

"I'm not afraid of you, Miss Danger! Your boyfriend can't protect you forever!" Mark snapped, as she slowly stalked towards them as he had done earlier, ignoring Ray's pleas to come back as she did. Not even the hand that caught her wrist could hold her back and for the first time in her life, she wrenched herself from her lover's grip. The rage was just too strong and that cocky smirk on her enemy's face was just too big a taunt.

"True, but my bedroom needs a new rug and that walking carpet next to you fits the damn bill!" The heroine snapped and expertly threw the first punch, landing a mean blow on Mark's shoulder as Ray rose to quickly help her. Mark gripped his chest in pain and raised his arm to shield himself from the next blow...that never came. Rage was good, it fulled the fire and pushed (y/n) to work harder than ever before but that red tinge gave her tunnel vision. All could see and know and hear and think and feel was that guy hurting Henry and he had to pay, meaning as she wound up for her next sucker punch—a sharp jab to the gut—she didn't anticipate Joey's arms seizing her in a more of devastating triumph for The Thumb Buddies.

"GoT YoU, LiTTle LAdY!" He warbled as she struggled, kicked and spat in a show that was frankly animalistic for a woman usually so meek and mild, prompting Ray to charge like he'd wanted all evening. How dare they lay a hand on her, how dare he squeeze her arms so tightly that they'd leave bruises if she didn't have super-regeneration, how dare they try and place the idea that he'd ever stop protecting her in her head. Finally, it was his chance to give them the fist to the face he'd been preparing but oh, Captain Man was so predictable when it came to his sweet, little plaything.

"Don't you dare hurt her! Give her back to me!" He bellowed, stomping towards the villains with his fists clenched to fight as (y/n) continued to squirm against Joey, slandering him and his ancestors—particularly his mother—with every curse she knew. God, just how thick was his hair, her heel had dug into his shin like fifty times now and he didn't even wince, not when she bit into his hand to silence her—another moment of red for Ray, and the only time his crazed expression changed was when Joey's smirk met his. 

"Okay, fine. You can have her!" Mark spat with a sinister smile on his face and before Ray's very eyes, just as he was a metre away from them, the man's fist closed around her throat, his skin lighting up violet as the electricity surged from his illuminated skin, into her body and the Earth. Never had she imagined that she would become a human lightning rod, but honestly, she couldn't imagine anything, not when her entire body felt fried and crispy by the time she was released, shoved into Ray's arms as if she were a sack of potatoes.

"No, sweet girl! No..." The hero broke. Her eyes seemed to glaze over from the amount of electricity that had conducted itself through her and as the burn marks of a malicious hand print disappeared from her neck, the sleepiness set in. Jeez, was it just her or did everything feel...floopy all of a sudden, like all the energy, had been sucked from her body? Ray didn't care about anything other than her and Henry right now as he brought his second sidekick—no, his wife, goddammit, his damn wife, down to rest next to the kid's body and there he allowed a single tear to slip down his cheek. 

"You're okay, darling girl. I've got you...you're safe," Maybe he was talking to her or maybe he was talking to himself as a way to convince himself that none of this was his fault. It had all happened so quickly; one minute they were swapping jokes, the next, Henry had blacked out and Miss Danger was on the warpath, leaving him no time at all to protect her. She was so limp in his arms as he cradled her to her chest for a moment, watching with a heartbroken expression as her eyes fought to stay open but with no luck. It was hard to breathe let alone focus on anything tangible, though, her brain did register the protector hovering over her looking like he was the injured one.

"Ra..." (y/n) breathed out the singular syllable before everything faded to black, causing Ray's anguish to triple in weight, which then turned into fuel for his coming rampage. A kiss was placed on his precious girl's forehead as he laid her back down properly, ensuring that she was comfortable even though the world was grey for her right now. She hated sleeping on her back, so he ensured that she was on her side and close to Henry so they'd perhaps provide some comfort to each other, or maybe him since it was better to know that they were together. A final act of devotion for the pair. The Thumb Buddies dared to laugh at the sight of the sorrowful hero and his melancholy state, chortling when he glanced up with bloodshot yet dark eyes. Oh, did he want a fight too?

"You'll pay for hurting her..." "Ooh, we're so scared! I'll take you down just like I did to Miss Danger and Kid Danger!" Mark snapped at the furious man, not caring about the way his muscles tensed to the point where they were popping out and straining against the material of his super-suit or the way he cracked his knuckles in preparation for rearranging their faces. Oh, Ray was gonna enjoy this; no one touched his sidekick and no one touched his future wife without enduring his wrath, a taste of that legendary strength that so many feared. If these idiots were smart, they should've been quaking in their knee pads.

"You're little electric surprise might've knocked out Kid Danger and Miss Danger, but let's see how it works on a man...who's indestructible!" Ray bellowed and without a second thought, he made his move. He flew towards Mark with his fist pulled back to his ear in a Superman punch that would surely make the small guy regret messing with the people he loved most but The Thumb Buddies weren't backing down either. They met Captain Man in the middle with Mark's arm raised to counter the attack, catching Ray's fist as it aimed for his face. 

This electric surge was instantaneous, causing the hero to groan at the immense pain. God, if it was this bad for him with all of his densitised muscles and cells, how bad was it for (y/n) with her weaker super-regeneration? Or Henry with nothing but super-fast reflexes? He put up a damn good fight though, staying on his feet even as Mark pushed him back and drained more and more of his energy from those cells, who were powerless to stop the pain. Sure, it didn't leave any marks but it sapped everything in him, forcing Ray to add his second hand to the clash.

He groaned, panted, squeaked and squealed as the villain grinned evilly at how his resolve weakened with every passing second until Ray fell to his knees with burning knuckles and cooked fingers, his eyes crossing from how blurry his vision was. Since when were there six Thumb Buddies? 

He stumbled for his sweet girl, terrified at the thought of going down and leaving her and the kid open to attack but he couldn't help but succumb to the darkness as they had. With a final, slurred groan, he crumpled to the floor, falling across Henry's body with his face smooshing into (y/n)'s butt with very little decorum and just like that the most inexperienced villains on the block took down the city's greatest crimefighters. 

"I did it! I defeated Captain Man!" Mark gasped in delight as he turned to Joey and clapped his hands upon seeing the heroes piled on top of one another. Honestly, he'd expected that to go on for much longer, after all, everyone knew of Captain Man's power, but taking down him was as easier as it had been with his sidekicks. Sure, Miss Danger had been as feisty as Kid Danger had been bland but the resulting high it gave him was phenomenal, enough to spur him into action as Joey howled in celebration.

"Okay, I'll grab the kid and Miss Danger. You get Captain Man, we'll throw 'em in the van and we'll come back for the rest of the rocket fuel!" He instructed his friend with an exuberant energy that only came from crushing your worst enemies in battle. 

Joey could do the heavy lifting with Ray's dense body since he was taller and just a bit stronger and Mark would drag Henry and (y/n) away from a jaunty trip to the last place they'd know on Earth—a small amount of payback worth the two lives they had ruined. At that moment, The Thumb Buddies had labelled themselves, judge, jury and executioner and they'd see each hero swing if it was the last thing they did.

"WhAt abOUt baRbECuE?" "We'll get barbecue later! Now, come on!" "OkAy!" Of course, they still had to get their priorities straight, such as dragging the unconscious bodies to their van for transportation. And strangely enough, when Ray's cheek left (y/n)'s...cheek, he let out a small whimper, as if he was still aware that they were being harshly separated. Still, for The Thumb Buddies, revenge was the only thing they'd be tasting for the next few hours.

~A couple of hours later, in a barn~

Ring, ring.

Annoying.

Ring, ring.

Stop.

Ring, ring. 

Okay, couldn't a girl sleep in peace anymore? Jeez. 

(y/n) woke up with a jolt as her fatigue-laced brain choked to life and started turning its cogs again, making her wonder why her bedroom looked and felt so different. Since when was that her alarm? Had the air always been so close? Did she always sleep standing up? The only normal factor was that Ray was by her side, only not in the usual way because in the whack-job bedroom, even the normalities had anomalies. The man's face was pressed into hers almost uncomfortably with his nose hooked under her jaw, his forehead leaning on her cheek and all of his weight pushing her into the metal mattress. Wait, metal?

The oxymoron of the cold warmth that surrounded her jump-started her mind and blew away the cobwebs that formed after a couple of hours of total shutdown. Her eyes rebooted and pushed away the fuzziness of sleep to realise that the darkness was not that familiar and cosy environment that greeted her every morning, but rather a small, eerie, alarmingly crowded metal room or perhaps box. Whatever it was, it was small for one person let alone three, something she realised as the last of the unconsciousness faded away and she saw that Ray was the one snoozing on her and she had been snoozing on Henry. 

Their soft snores would've been cute had her heart not immediately lurched in panic as she struggled to remember how they had gotten there until it all came flooding back; Thumb Buddies, electricity, pain, Henry, Ray, nothingness. Oh, right, they'd been attacked—ring, ring.

Fuck, that sound was annoying, especially when paired with how heavy her doofus was as he happily buried his nose further into her neck and dopily smiled in his sleep. Well, she was glad he was having a nice time because the closer he got, the more his utility belt and all of its contraptions dug into his hip with a dull ache, but she wouldn't have to suffer alone for much longer. Henry too hated the sound of his phone ringing.

"Nice of you to join me..." (y/n) muttered as she adjusted Ray's head position for a brief moment, hoping for some respite from the hot air tickling her neck as Henry fidgeted in his first few seconds of being awake. Okay, he had the woman's hair in his mouth and a painfully aching gut from that earlier punch but this was fine. Totally fine. not awkward and difficult from how they were practically a Ray-(y/n)-Henry sandwich right now.

"Wha-wha—what?" The teen stumbled as he made sense of everything in the same order she did, although, he didn't have to contend with having a fucking huge man using him as a human mattress. For that he was very grateful because he could see how she was struggling to juggle holding him up and not disturb him, the whole situation being a far cry from how they usually cuddled in the utmost comfort with the man being careful to not let his weight squash her. 

Right now, he couldn't be nearly as careful as that and (y/n) grunted when she held him away from her body, only for Ray to clamp himself back into her with a surprisingly strong grip for a guy currently dreaming about a sweet girl and a wedding.

"You should—probably get—that." She muttered as she gave up trying and resigned herself to enduring the discomfort until her doofus woke up. One of these days, she'd find fun in being awake when he was asleep because if people thought he was clingy when he was awake then they sure as hell hadn't seen him asleep. 

"Y-yeah..." Henry nodded shakily and fumbled to grasp his phone from his belt as he sensed the woman's strained tone. Who could be calling right now? They were trapped in god knows what, in god knows where by probably their new enemies, this wasn't a good time for a friendly chat. Still, maybe the caller could help out, after all, it was Charlotte and she was smart, much smarter than he was and she wasn't pinned down by a dense superhero as (y/n) was.

"Yeah?" "Hey, where are you?" Charlotte's voice was just about audible for (y/n) given that she was practically on top of Henry too, who was still trying to understand what the hell had happened. He remembered talking, then everyone getting angry and then...pain and darkness. There had been no warning but he could swear that he'd heard people screaming his name as his brain turned to mush and those people sounded pretty upset. 

Back in the present, the only clue to where they could be would probably be found through the tiny port window in front of their faces, but so far, there was nothing remarkable to see, just some hay and old farm equipment. This didn't look like Ferris Fueller's anymore.

"The ass-end of nowhere by the looks of it..." (y/n) mumbled as she succumbed to her fate and wound her arms around Ray securely. She figured that even if she wasn't comfortable in this sweat box, it didn't mean she couldn't fawn over her lover, who never seemed to get enough rest in their busy lives—not enough to satisfy her instinct to care for him. A few more minutes wouldn't hurt her hip could cope and his soft sigh of comfort was enough to make it okay as Henry ignored her sour comment and looked around for a clue. 

"Um, I'm not—I'm not sure, Charlotte. I think we're in a—I think we're trapped inside something like a—like a" Henry stuttered as he struggled to breathe in the close space without panicking. Everything would be fine, they'd think of something and they'd figure it out somehow and bust out before all the air in the rocket was gone. And even if the words weren't coming to his fuzzy mind, there were two people outside the door waiting to rub the situation in their faces.

"You're in a rocket!" "ReVEngE!" "Revenge in a rocket!" The Thumb Buddies growled as they peered menacingly into the machine with crazed expressions. Right, thanks for the information. It was a bit disconcerting to be judged and scrutinised so harshly by the men as they viewed the captives from the safety of the outside, but (y/n) and Henry didn't let them see any sign of fear or anger on their faces, just the irritation gained from their still incessant exuberance even though they were evil now. God, what had been cute was now annoying and they blinked slowly as the window was fogged up from The Thumb Buddies' warm breath.

"It appears we're in a rocket." The boy said in a monotone voice as the radiation-riddled whackjobs nodded in synch with a manic delight at how their plan had worked so well. Sure, the heroes (particularly Captain Man) had been difficult to carry and escort to the same barn that they crash-landed in but they'd managed it, and now, revenge would be so sweet. If only they saw it that way...

~Ten minutes later~

Ten minutes later and sadly, their situation had not improved, neither had the Thumb Buddies done anything else. The taunting sucked but the sidekicks could deal with that, it was just a miracle that Ray wasn't awake yet because he did not take to being mocked very well at all.

"Hey! Hey! Let us out of this rocket, will ya?!" Henry shouted, having long forgotten about his phone call with Charlotte so, he began thumping his fist against the door as if that was gonna crack open the latch. The Thumb Buddies couldn't care less as they sat back to watch the show with the trays of steamy, delicious barbecue that they'd picked up on the drive over, one final fuck-you to the trio since they'd suggested it in the first place. Oh yeah, they were gonna chow down as they blasted off and there would be no better dinner and show as long as everything went to plan.

"For god's sake, just open the door! Come on—" (y/n) growled and remove one of her hands that had been stroked through Ray's hair to pound against the glass. Again, nothing happened except for drawing a few amused chuckles from the villains as they happily stripped the meat off a rack of ribs. No fair, those should've been their ribs, it had been Henry's idea, but there was one other outcome from all the noise. The man-child had awoken from his nap.

"AH! AH! AH! AH! AH! AGHHH! AH! AHHH!" Ray woke with a start from an especially lovely dream that had turned weird and scary at the end, only to find himself in unknown surroundings with very familiar faces. It was no wonder that he hyperventilated, (y/n) and Henry nearly had too, but this time, the hero had them to calm him down as his sweet girl felt his heart practically jumping through his chest. Poor baby, he looked so scared, was it a bad dream?

"Doofus, doofus! Calm down! Yeah, that's it, calm down, sweetheart, you're all right..." (y/n) told him gently as Henry winced from all the screeches in his ear, and he was glad that she was the one who calmed him down. With a small amount of luck and a lot of awkward angling, the woman stroked Ray's cheek and whispered in his ear that they were all safe and sound, no reason to panic apart from that with every stroke, she nearly elbowed the kid in the face.

"Yeah, calm down, dude. You can't scream like that, this is a small space." "Ohhh, man. I was having such a bad dream..." Ray swallowed as he stopped screaming, grounded by the angel telling him it would all be okay. How could it be okay? The last thing he knew, she was lying in a death-like state next to his unconscious sidekick as he too was taken down. Was she all right? Was anyone hurt? Had the dream been real? Because it sure as hell felt real, from the start to the very end, meaning he'd take the trauma of the final few seconds if it meant the beginning could be reality.

"My poor doofus, are you okay? You don't have to worry about it anymore, you're safe...you're with me," (y/n) smiled up at him happily as he craned his neck to peer down at her, his chin pressed to his chest as he pecked her forehead. It was impossible to have a proper kiss in the tight space; she couldn't stretch and he couldn't bend, so the crown of her head would have to do, but it was good enough. Being with her would always be enough.

"I know, sweet girl. And I'm sorry I couldn't save you in time, I just wasn't—" Ray began in a heartbroken, ashamed voice as it was his fiancée's turn to rest her head on his chest, a much more comfy arrangement given that he was taller. Maybe if he had moved faster, maybe if he'd fought harder, maybe if he'd just been a better hero then none of this would've happened.

"No. I should've thought before attacking like that, it was stupid and reckless, even if my lovely doofus always comes to my rescue." (y/n) immediately quelled his fears and doubts by hugging herself to his chest so closely that she could hear the gentle thrumming of his heartbeat. Mistakes had been made on both sides and the past was the past,, nothing could be changed even if they wanted it to and right now, certainly in Henry's view, it would be better to focus on what they could do now to save their skins.

"Ugh, guys, you can kiss and be all gross later. Y'know, we got a little bit of a situation going on here—" "No, I gotta tell you both about this dream..." "What? No dude, nobody likes to hear about other people's dreams." Henry rolled his eyes as his boss insisted on giving the mundane details about what had plagued his nap time. Seriously? There was nothing they could do about it so there was no point in hearing him moan and groan about it, not even for (y/n) and she was famous for hanging off every word her doofus said with almost unbelievable interest in his longwinded speeches.

"We were getting married, y'know? It was so nice and sweet and perfect, and I was waiting at the altar for (y/n) to come and everyone was telling me how beautiful she looked in her dress. But then, I couldn't wait any longer, so I went looking for her because y'know, I want to see my beautiful wife for myself and then, all of a sudden, I was an actor." Ray started, recalling with precise imagery what he saw and how he felt as he stood with a random, fuzzy blob that was meant to be the officiator. It had all felt so warm and perfect at that moment like the sunlight was shining into the room during the golden hour to make every rose-tinted.

But then, everything turned...crazy. Like in all dreams, second felt like hours and after hearing so many whispers about the beautiful bride, Ray had ventured away from the ceremony to seek his sweet girl, turning a corner to see her standing with her back to him. A train of white silk or chiffon lay before her in a path of white, pure snow for any man to follow on his knees so that they could worship the goodness who still kept her face hidden, but for Ray, it didn't matter. 

He scrambled to go and take her into his arms, his wife looking so perfect on the happiest day of their lives, only for the room to swirl into darkness when he strayed too close. He flew too close to the sun and got burnt as Icarus did, only he didn't lose his wings, he lost the taste of bliss before it could even sit on his tongue.

"Doofus, you dreamed about us getting married?" (y/n) asked incredulously, wondering if that scenario could have possibly been true. She thought that she was the only one who dreamt of the day they'd finally get to tie the know, had written those sweet yet agonisingly brief moments to her being a hopeless romantic, but apparently, she wasn't alone in such thoughts. Ray had them too.

"Of course, sweet girl, but then, like I said, I was an actor on Broadway and I was playing Annie, y'know, the orphan?" "Let me out!" Henry begged The Thumb Buddies as Ray relentless started wittering on about his dream, which had been bad enough when he was going on about that mushy crap about the wedding, but ow they had to sit through some lamentable tale about how it had all gone weird. None of it was real, the kid was sorry to say, not the actor bit, and unfortunately, not the wedding bit either, so retelling it was a massive waste of time, almost torturous to the point where he'd rather sit with his enemies that be in the same nook when the touchiest couple in the universe were as close to him as they were to each other.

"I tried singing The Sun'll Come Out but I couldn't remember when..." That had (y/n) smiling because it was such a Ray thing to happen in a dream - forgetting the lyrics to one of the most recognisable musical songs of all time. And he poked completely terrified as he remembered "going on stage" to perform the number, the fear flooding back when he recalled the awkwardness when Annie started singing a song that didn't make sense. Oh, how Daddy Warbucks shook his head in disappointment, so terrifying.

"Oh, doofus, I'm sure you'll remember it at some point," She told him gently and placed an even gentle kiss on the patch of skin that was visible just above his collar. Henry grimaced as the man shivered and pouted at the prospect of not getting any more given how crowded the rocket was, and prayed for an end to the torture soon. Knowing his luck, it would be tomorrow.

"Stop talking...and kissing, please." "No, no, no, sweetheart, I tried singing The Sun'll Come Out Today, Next Week, Wednesday, and Thursday, and Hanukkah, but that wasn't right. The audience just kept laughing at me!" Well, to be fair to the guy, that did sound quite traumatic. No one wants to be onstage and acting the clown when it's supposed to be a serious performance, but that wasn't real and in the waking world, Ray could at least find comfort in his future wife's support. And Henry's, of course, Sort of.

"Well, at least they're laughing, right? Okay, so that's a good thing, so can we move on?" "No, no, that was bad, dude. The audience—their laughter sounded fake." Ray corrected him, remembering the cold eeriness that came from the crowd who laughed like a room full of ventriloquist dummies rather than people. Their shoulders shook a bit too hard and when they grinned, it didn't reach their eyes, which made it more unnerving for Ray as he gave t his best shot.

"What do you mean, doof?" "It was like fake laughter." "Fake?" "You know, like that awful, fake laughter you hear on TV?" Ray asked them and they knew exactly what he was talking about - the laughter track. It was supposed to make people enjoy shows more but honestly if you have to put in fake laughter just to understand that there was meant to be a joke there, is it even comedy? Whatever, they had more important things to worry about, namely getting out of the box so Ray could properly kiss his lover or y'know, figuring out what to do about The Thumb Buddies.

"Anyway, what did you want to tell me?" "Oh, just that we're trapped in a rocket and The Thumb Buddies are about to shoot us into outer space!" Henry hissed as Ray silently processed the information, catching the way his sweet girl cringed at how they'd been ignoring the elephant in the room. Right, enough about endearing and disturbing dreams, they had to focus because in the time they'd been talking, the Thumb Buddies had grown sadistic.

"What?!" Ray exclaimed as he heard the news. Outer space didn't sound very good; first of all, he was fairly certain that they didn't do weddings out there and he wanted one of those so much more badly after experiencing a foretaste in his sleep. And second of all, he'd seen how dangerous space could be just by the atrocious injuries suffered by those bozos outside, so that would mean that if they went, he'd be helpless to protect his sidekicks again, something he wasn't about to let happen again.

"Yeah!" "Why did you say something instead of asking me about my dream?!" Oh, god, Henry could not believe his ears. He knew his boss was a bit dumb and probably feeling quite protective after realising the danger they were all in, especially (y/n) considering how much he preferred her to be wrapped up in cotton wool. Still, it was quite surprising to hear him throwing the blame around, after all, Ray wouldn't be able to duck if the boy felt like smacking him.

"I didn't!" "Yes, you did! You asked me about my dream!" "What are you talking about?! You were the one drooling over your girlfriend, oh wait, sorry, fiancée!" Henry snapped as he and Ray began to bicker as if they were the married couple, making (y/n) growl lowly in her throat as she was caught in the middle of the spat. Surely, the finger-pointing and dishing out the blame could wait until later, especially since hearing about how Ray drooled over her made (y/n) flush as red as her uniform.

"You need to get your priorities together, all right?" "Wha—oh my god!" "Stop it! Stop arguing before I kill both of you!" The woman screeched over the racket, making the boys fall into huffy silence. It was the other's fault, no one would admit to being in the wrong, not when the grumpy lady in between them gave them murderous glares. Sheesh, wasn't there an easier, less intimate way for The Thumb Buddies to get revenge that didn't include Henry having to spend his last moments with one of the most infuriating men he'd ever met?

"Let me out of this rocket right now!" "Oh, sorry, we can't! We're having dinner!" "HahAHhaHa!" Mark and Joey laughed at Kid Danger's pain as they feasted on tasty ribs and corn. This was like a drama series or a sitcom, these three were so dysfunctional but miraculously, they worked so well, which was kinda annoying for their enemies but also entertaining. 

"We don't care if you're having dinner! Is—is that barbecue?!" Ray yelled in disbelief as he pushed his way to press his nose against the glass. He could see into the barn that way and saw The Thumb Buddies surrounded by hay and straw as they sat and nibbled on the frankly awesome food they'd ordered earlier, the food he'd been dying to share with his sidekick and his sweet girl after this mission was done. Hopefully, if he worked out a plan for escape using that spontaneous genius of his, that would still be on the table.

"They're having barbecue!" "Who cares, doofus? Just let it go!" "I care, sweet girl! I'm the guy who had the idea to have barbecue tonight first!" (y/n)'s attempts to keep the peace were short-lived as Ray pouted about losing out on the barbecue, so deep in his grief of what could've been such an enjoyable meal that he reinvented the narrative with him being the one who thought of it. Well, that stung Henry, who took a second to realise the discrepancy because goddammit, he was the one who wanted smokey goodness. Right? Ray just wanted to feed halloumi fries to his fiancée.

It didn't matter that (y/n) had suggested barbecue in the first place. It didn't matter that they'd painted themselves in as the genius as if they were the ones who were capable of strokes of genius and she was kinda willing to look past their mistake if it meant they shut the fuck up. Jeez, how could they get so confused?

"No, no, that was my idea!" "Dude, it doesn't matter whose idea it was first!" "Dude, you just said—" And so, the bickering started again, meaning (y/n) threw her head back and groaned as they ignored her previous warning. 

"Guys, I was the one who wanted barbecue! Me! Miss Danger! Hello?" (y/n) groaned as they ignored her correction at how they'd essentially rewritten the entire scenario wrong. Morons, how could they forget?

They were all so caught up in the frustration and irritation of being outwitted and trapped so easily that they didn't realise that The Thumb Buddies had grown tired of the endless arguments and had abandoned their food to wander over to the window again, intent on finishing off the heroes for once and for all.

"Okay! Captain Jerk! Miss Jerk! And Kid...Jerk!" "AlL jErKS!"  "That's right, Joey! Mark and Joey seriously needed to work on their insulting skills because god, that was awful. Jerk was nowhere near strong enough for the hate they felt but they also couldn't come up with something separate for each hero. That was just sad, particularly when they trailed off at the end rather than maintaining a confident tone.

"Seriously? Is that the best you can come up with?" (y/n) asked, raising her eyebrows sceptically as The Thumb Buddies floundered at her dry voice and how their enemies were so unaffected by their blunders, but they played it off quickly; no matter how much she aggravated them, nothing would stop them from blasting Miss Danger and her dumb friends on the same one-way trip that they'd taken.

"Shut up! And now, it's time for you guys to get shot into space!" "HahaAhahHAha! GoOd oNE, MArK!" "I didn't make a joke!" Or perhaps it would be best to straighten out the dynamic between them before they started slinging insults at each other. Not knowing when the other was making a joke was a bad sign of poor teamwork and too much agitation in (y/n)'s mind, but whatever. She wasn't exactly going to complain if they fell apart, no, she was more focused on working with Henry to calm the situation down before someone did something rash.

"Okay, okay, listen!" Henry started before the Thumb Buddies could descend into an argument themselves and they quietened to suspiciously listen to what he had to say, "we're sorry, okay?"

"S-sorry for what?" Mark stuttered, willing to take a heartfelt apology if it was genuine. Honestly, Henry and (y/n) were happy to swallow their pride and say they were sorry if it meant they could get out of the rocket. Neither of them wanted to grovel and bootlick their way out but hey, that wasn't below them, unlike Ray who turned his nose up at the thought. Apologise to the men who hurt his sweet girl and best friend before hurting him too? They were lucky he hadn't snapped their necks.

"Uh, for not helping you guys. When you two got shot up into space, we should've done something and we didn't. All I can say is, we're sorry about that." (y/n) said sorrowfully with her head bowed in apology. Of course, being the gentle soul she was, she did feel quite bad about leaving The Thumb Buddies to the devastation of the radiation storm, so this wasn't so hard for her, even if she could feel Ray's glare zipping past her head towards their enemies and then the pout nuzzling into her hair since she was being all nice to the guys he hated.

"Yeah, you guys looked up to us and we let you down. I'm sorry too." Henry finished, which was the icing on the apologetic cake. It was so real and soft, so perfect and effective that The Thumb Buddies looked at each other with tears in their eyes and quivering smiles. Could it have possibly worked? Could they possibly be reconsidering their choices? Could they possibly be thinking about letting the heroes go? Well, go (y/n) and Henry, their plan had worked a treat.

"You really mean that? You're all sorry for what you did to us?" Mark asked in a gravelly voice that was thick with emotion, causing the sidekicks to smile sincerely as Ray released a quiet scoff, preferring to focus all of his attention on how his body was pressed against (y/n)'s. She just hoped that he held his tongue long enough for them to get out of the rocket.

"Yeah..." "Of course, we are." Their eyes looked so remorseful that for a brief moment, they melted the ice that had grown around Mark and Joey's hearts, causing them to tearfully walk over to the rocket door thinking that friendship was still possible even after everything that had happened. Mark moved to twist the lock on the door so they could all hold hands and sing John Lennon with sunshine, rainbows and everything peaceful, but then, of course, the brief moment was over. Who shot it dead? Ray with his stupid, fat mouth.

"I'm not sorry." He stated firmly as he pushed his head around (y/n)'s and peered through the glass, smirking when Mark's kindly smiling face twisted into a rage once again. Well, they'd given peace a chance and it had failed because of their stupid friend, the one who refused to move on because he still felt the pain from when that bastard zapped the sweetest, most undeserving girl and a young boy so harshly that they fainted. They could've...he didn't dare imagine that dark scenario, his heart couldn't take losing its soulmate so soon after finding her, so he just settled for looking smug, even when the woman and boy next to him look appalled.

"Duuuude!" Ra—Captain Man! Why did you say that you—you—you doofus?!" They exclaimed as The Thumb Buddies stomped off to continue the original plan as intended. If Captain Man didn't want to apologise then the ceasefire was irrelevant and no matter if his sidekicks were sorry, the ringleader spoilt it for the rest. God, freedom had been within the reach, their fingertips had brushed it, only for Ray to crush it with his ego and reckless tongue. Even for him, this was a moment of extreme moronic stupidity.

"Well, it wasn't our fault! I can't just forgive them for what they did to you, darlin', I thought I'd lost you and the kid for a moment back there," Ray confessed nonchalantly and (y/n) softened a bit at that. She knew the feeling of not being able to breathe when her soulmate was thrown into peril, even if his indestructibility protected him. Seeing her and Henry collapse must've been heart-wrenching for her sweet, kind doofus who never wanted the ones he took into battle to get hurt, so she understood why he was angry. However, that apology had been their best if only shot at getting out of here.

"Oh, sweetheart..." "Yeah, well, you could've at least gone along with it, pretending you were sorry for ten seconds while these morons let us out of this rocket!" Henry, though, wasn't feeling so tender after the admission and his mouth released the torrent of insults and truths like he couldn't stop it. Both Mark and Joey gasped and squealed as he revealed his true feelings, that he wasn't that sorry deep down and that he thought they were idiots—which they were. Screw dorks, dorks were cute little nerds who would never hurt a fly, which was the total opposite of these morons.

"I think you may have upset them..." (y/n) hissed to Henry as Joey shoved his furious face in front of the window to give them his most scandalised expression. Great, now they were pissed off again and there'd be no way of redeeming themselves this time, not when they knew that they didn't truly mean it. Perhaps space is nice this time of year...

"Uh...hey! Uh, guys, come back, he was just kidding! He is sorry! He just gets very protective over Miss Danger!" "No, I'm not! Hurt my future wife and you'll pay for it!" Ray didn't care if he was making the situation worse as he shot down every attempt the boy made for reparation. It was just as he said, he wasn't gonna say sorry until they did and grovelled before his sweet girl for hurting her so viciously. Protective was right, why would he kid about not taking people's safety seriously when they did one of the most dangerous jobs going?

"Still kidding!" "Not kidding!" "He always says that when he's kidding. Believe me, he's just a really mouthy but loveable man-child, we can still be friends, right?" (y/n) chuckled nervously as she watched The Thumb Buddies begin to furiously hasten their preparations to launch the rocket, which told her that whatever she said wouldn't make much of a difference. Her doofus, she loved him to bits but god, he could be so dense sometimes, physically and mentally. Truly, she appreciated the concern and later she'd probably blush when remembering how protective he grew over her and how seriously he dealt with any threat, but now wasn't the time. He could be affectionate 'later', if there would be a 'later' or not.

"It's too late! You're all gonna be orbiting the moon by this time tomorrow!" Mark growled menacingly, causing (y/n) and Henry to shudder at the thought of being lost to the cosmos or horrifically mutated by the perils that were out there. Maybe she and Ray would be fine but the teen wouldn't, he had no protection whatsoever. And speaking of Ray, he had to admit that he didn't like the sound of that either, not when he'd made a promise to his sweet girl earlier that night but at the same time, the threat had a hidden silver lining.

"Tomorrow! That's what it was!" "What are you on about, doof?" (y/n) asked as she and Henry looked at him in confusion, but all Ray could do was offer them a goofy smile because finally, his synapses had connected.

"In my dream when I was Annie on Broadway. Tomorrow! That's when the sun comes out..." Ray grinned at her happily and proudly, glad that he'd managed to figure something out even if it wasn't particularly important. She looked so cute when she was confuddled by his logic, her head tilted to the side and her wide eyes studied his dorky, handsome face with so much love that he couldn't help but shift to connect their foreheads with their lips barely brushing against each other. It wasn't the best kiss they'd ever shared but after going without for a few hours, it was bliss, a welcome relief to experience that honey-bubblegum infusion again.

"...You're sick," Henry stated as he watched them get all cosy over practically nothing. He knew that (y/n) saw something in Ray that he'd never understand, which was why she worked so well with him since she understood that doofus as no woman had ever been able to, but ultimately, to him, he was so annoying—they were so annoying when they got like this. That was a sentiment shared by The Thumb Buddies, who in the time they'd witnessed the couple forget about them and all the other worries in the world had grown trigger-happy.

"Ignition!" "FiVe, fOUr, ThREe, tWo, oNE, gO!" Joey wasted no time in screeching the countdown alarmingly fast and with a good, old dramatic flair, Mark slammed his thumb onto the big, red button that ignited the launch sequence. Because of course, it wouldn't work unless it was a big, red button. More worryingly, the thrusters for the rocket kicked in and everything started to shake, rumble and feel very real for the heroes, causing them to grit their teeth and panic just a bit. Okay, they weren't kidding about sending them to space; part of Ray had hoped it had been bluff when he heard their threats, but clearly not.

"Not sorry!" Was the only thing that sprang to mind as one arm wrapped around his sweet girl to secure her against his chest as the other clung to a metal pipe for dear life so that they wouldn't jiggle around the cockpit too violently. Well, to be fair to him, there didn't seem to be much point in trying to make amends now considering that the thrusters were warming up and it was only a matter of minutes until they were breaking free from gravity, so he might as well insult them while he could—maybe that would get them to stop gleefully celebrating.

"You are not helping the situation!" (y/n) yelled back as the shaking got worse and as the rocket began to spin in place, it became harder and harder to hang on without hitting their heads on something hard. They could only pray that someone, somewhere would take pity on them and take away their pain because the adults were sure that they'd never be able to take Henry's tortured screams and Henry was sure he'd never be able to deal with the heartache that would ensure should something happen to one of them. It all looked so damn bleak until...nothing.

"Huh?" The Thumb Buddies frowned in confusion as the growling from the rocket shrank into a cough and then, a splutter and then...silence. Just as it was reaching a crescendo, verging on enough power to start soaring, the rocket's engines gave up and to the relief of those trapped inside, it stopped moving. Well, it kinda stopped moving; the damn thing also fell over from the momentum gained from the thruster's vibrations and taking the bump was rather painful, especially when Henry landed with both Ray and (y/n) on top of him, but they were okay. They were on the Earth still and that was a blessing.

There was a short second of respite for everyone as the criminals wondered what had gone wrong and the heroes groaned in pain at having been squashed into each other but then things got really bad—for The Thumb Buddies. As Ray, (y/n) and Henry safely tucked inside, which was kinda ironic when they thought about it, the guys in the barn regretted the days they were born as the rocket's circuits flickered to life again and began kicking out sparks and flames again, effectively turning them into two human, chargrilled hotdogs as the flames reached two thousand degrees or more. All the trio could hear were the pained, warbled groans of Joey and the high-pitched, anguished squeaks of Mark as they were oblivious to how they were being torched, it was just nice and toasty inside.

As the flames stopped, The Thumb Buddies turned to each other with agony permanently painted on their scorched faces. Everything in the rocket's flamethrower path had been burnt to a crisp, including a thick strip of the barn's floor and not to mention the Thumb Buddies' uniform. Their hair was fried, and their jackets and knee pads were singed and smoky as they struggled to comprehend what had just happened. Y'know, the kinda pain that's so bad, it's just numb.

And yet, there was no rest for the wicked. If the pain was bad enough, the second lot of fire wasn't going to help; the screams returned as the final tank of fuel ignited, sending another flare of flames into their faces, burning away whatever had survived the first bout. This time, however, they could swear it was hotter, enough to make their minds short-circuit as blue tongues streaked through the amber, proving that this must've been the power that would typically send people away into the stratosphere, not burn someone's purple face off

"Okay, if you move your right leg, we can—yeah, just—-push!" (y/n)'s snappy instructions came from the rocket as the charcoal-like Thumb Buddies squeaked and stared into nothingness, probably too far gone to help as the heroes arranged themselves to bashed the rocket's door away. The floor had damaged the hinges and lock just enough so that a good, strong shove would dislodge it, so with an enormous amount of coordination and effort, Ray and Henry took the ends as (y/n) focused on the middle and on the count of three, their strength united to free them. Success.

"Come on, sweet girl, let me help you," Ray smiled at his lover as she rose with as much grace as one could have after being trapped in a tight space with nowhere to stretch her legs for a few hours. He extended his hand to her, an invitation to help her out of the rocket after he and Henry took the first steps onto the straw; tripping and falling would be a disaster now and she didn't want to look stupid as much as he didn't want to see her scrape a knee, so she took him up on that offer.

"Thanks, Captain. Whatever can I do to repay you?" The heroine grinned playfully as she too made it to safety and her eyes crinkled with happiness when Ray placed a finger on his chin and pretend to think hard about what he wanted his reward to be. This was what they needed after spending so long all cramped and restricted with no room to love each other properly, so it came as no surprise when Ray didn't drop her hand, rather, he held on tight to it.

"I can think of one thing. I've been waiting all night for this," He muttered softly and pulled his fiancée close enough to drop his head to connect their lips. Out in the open, it was easy for her to stand on her tiptoes and wind her arms around his neck without fearing whacking someone or something accidentally, meaning their first proper kiss of the night was magical if a little extra for Henry to handle. These two, what would they do if one ever had to take a business trip and the other couldn't go? Crash and burn, probably.

"Thank god, I'm not in that rocket anymore," the boy mumbled to himself as he watched them melt into each other's arms, happy to just explore the taste and feel that they knew so well as if no one else was looking, but that was the problem. As Henry took another look around the room, it became stupidly obvious that they weren't alone and that in their sudden need for passion and affection, Captain Man and Miss Danger had missed the very crispy Thumb Buddies stood like statues in the middle of the barn, "uh, guys?"

"What, kid? Can't you see that I'm kissing my—oh." "What's wrong? I want more kiss—oh, dear god. That's a problem." The couple pulled away with sulky expressions, looking at the boy like he'd ended the party before it could get going, but then, their gazes followed his. Right, okay then. Thumb Buddies. Crispy. Looking like they'd been reduced to carbon. That was a problem, but they couldn't help but wonder; was it their problem?

"Uh, should we help?" (y/n) asked as they took in the men's frizzled appearances and for a moment, her caregiver's heart jumped at the thought of tending to their injuries. But then, as Ray and Henry turned their noses up at the idea, her brain intervened and said hell no. Why should they help? They could have been in space right now because of these guys and it was just because they hadn't worked out all of the right math and physics that they were still on Earth. The calculations were wrong, the rocket couldn't take off because little did people know but rockets are marvels of precise engineering and physics in play, deadly physics if you asked the superheroes.

"I'm sure they're fine." "Nah, sweet girl. Don't you worry your pretty, little head about them," The boys told her basically what she'd already told herself. Tit for tat, the Thumb Buddies had taken on the responsibility of the revenge mission, so it was also their responsibility to deal with the painful aftermath—they could take care of their wounds without the help of Miss Danger's medkit. After what they'd done, Ray wasn't letting her sweet purity anywhere near those assholes, rather selfishly yet unashamedly, he wanted her all to himself for a fun, relaxed evening.

"Should we, uh, eat their barbecue?" Henry asked as he eyed the food still perched on a hay bale, ripe for the taking. The states they were in, they weren't gonna be eating it anytime soon and it seemed like such a shame to leave such good-looking ribs, corn and lord know what else to go to waste, surely, this was the noble thing to do; make use of the leftovers now that they were useless to the Thumb Buddies.

"Yes..." Ray nodded brazenly, not caring about being a thief or anything like that, not even the wince/glare Mark gave him as he strode across the room with his hand in the small of (y/n)'s back, guiding her to the mouth-watering delights of which they were going to commandeer—nautical term. Without a second thought, the hungry crimefighter started picking through the bits they did and did not want, nibbling whatever they wanted because their enemies had set fire to themselves. Another lesson to learn; it's best to point the fire away from yourself, that way, you won't look like an overdone turkey.

"Not sorry." Ray shrugged at the men as they took the two platters, one for him and his sweet girl and the other for Henry to have all to himself since he was the one who was gonna be feeling that electric punch for the next few days. It didn't matter, they thrived off sharing food anyway since it had something to do with that dumb prehistoric DNA inside them that dictated that for their survival, food shouldn't be shared because mammoths and sabre-tooth tigers don't come along that often. Only important protectors and protectees could be shared with because survival wasn't possible without them. Man want sweet wife, woman want adorkable doofus.

"You're such a child, Raymond," (y/n) told him quietly as they stepped out of the barn into the cool air of the night. God knows where they were, it looked like they'd have to call Schwoz to come and pick them up in the Man-Copter because the city was nowhere to be seen on the horizon, it was all just quaint farmer's fields. Of course, the cops would have to come and pick up the Thumb Buddies because jail was the only safe place for them now but for a moment, it was just a boy who wasn't listening, a man, his sweet, darling girl and a whole lot of barbecue.

"I'll never forgive them, not after what they did to you and the kid. Neither of you deserved that," he replied quietly, offering her a buffalo wing dipped with extra sauce before plucking a halloumi fry for himself. That was still a sore, salty point for him, that he'd let his guard down for a minute and chaos had ensued, resulting in him having to live with the memory of his sidekicks lying unconscious for the rest of his life. Screw Orphan Annie, he'd have nightmares about that instead now, unless the fear was replaced with the glowing, golden dreams about a wedding ceremony instead.

"Maybe, maybe not. It's over now and it's more important that we're all safe..." (y/n) sighed before taking a bit out of her wing, chewing slowly as they contemplated that notion. It was true, no one was hurt and no one had injuries that wouldn't heal, for all of their mistakes and shortcomings, they'd come out unscathed thanks to a small spot of luck, which was scary to think about but thinking wouldn't help. Why dwell on the past when you can live in the moment instead? "...though, I do want to hear more about these wedding dreams of yours. I want to see if they're similar to mine."

"What? You dream about us getting married too?" Ray asked with a soft gasp, his eyes widening as he realised the implications of what she meant. He thought it was just him imagining it all and how it would feel, how it will feel in the future when they get around to actually taking their vows. He thought he was the weirdo who'd been jumping the gun and picturing the day and then the wonderful days that would follow, meaning he often slipped up in reality when it came to calling her his fiancée and not his ire. Not yet, anyway.

"Of course, I do, sweetheart. I can't wait so when I'm asleep in your arms, I dream about how handsome you'll look and how nervous I'll be. There are always pink flowers around the place, cherry blossoms I think 'cause it's spring and even though I try to picture my dress, I never can because I'm always too busy looking at you as the aisle grows longer and longer and longer. And then, I always wake up." (y/n) described, trying to imagine the scene she saw in her dreams. It was always so perfect but always so distant too, enough for her to get a general feeling but never enough to be satisfied. That would have to be left for the real day when they married under the confetti of cherry blossom trees.

"It's okay, sweet girl. In my dreams, your dress is always so beautiful...but honestly, you could wear anything and I'd marry you—with Henry and Charlotte and even Jasper there too. I always see their faces at our wedding." Ray told her gently, setting the platter of barbecue down onto a rogue hay bale so that he could wind his arms around her waist and bring his lover into his embrace. Strangely enough, neither of them could say that each dream changed drastically; it was always the same episode more or less, although sometimes, little details changed as they whittled away at what was banned at the wedding and what was wanted. And then teens would always be wanted.

"And Schwoz, of course. He's always there in mine. And another face that I know but when I wake up I can never remember who it is. They're really important, though. I can feel it." The heroine pondered as she tried to delve into the depths of her memory to try and pluck the name to match it with the face that was always there. It was definitely a face; it had eyes and ears and a nose that came together to be a person she knew but her mind wouldn't say who. They must've been special because they were always there, smiling and helping her with her flowers as they waited for the ceremony to start. And it was really annoying that the face wouldn't come forward.

"We'll figure it out, (y/n), don't worry. We've got all the time in the world to plan our perfect day," He soothed her worries by trailing his lips across her cheek and towards her mouth. The soft kiss he left there smoothed the crease between her eyebrows and (y/n) released a deep breath. He was right, not very often, but for once, Ray Manchester was right. The time when that face would reveal itself would come and in the meantime, she had other things to plan for the happiest day of her life.

"Yeah, you're right. I'll remember, for sure. Maybe it'll come to me later."  "Yeah...Speaking of later, though, are we still on for tonight, sweet girl?" Or the happiest night of her life, either one sounded perfect. Pulling back from the fluffy moment, a mischievous smirk grew on the girl's face as she saw the glint in his eye at the thought of the promise he still hadn't forgotten. Sure, Ray forgot a lot of stuff but when it came to the important things or...the bedroom things, he had the memory of a goddamn elephant.

"Believe me, doofus, I've been ready since this morning..." (y/n) grinned and giggled along with him under the stars, causing Henry to look over with a mouthful of corn and he wondered what all the screeching was about. He didn't know why they'd fallen into a tickle battle that would no doubt leave the barbecue cold and end up with them melting into a make-out session. Idiots—he'd leave them to it; from the looks of things, they had whatever that was under control and knowing them, they knew exactly what they were doing and exactly where they were going, even if it did feel like they were just along for the ride at times. 

Dreams were always a good place to start anyway.

[sonicasura]

Persona 5: Ramón's Comeback

I wasn't going to leave this post alone especially since I began playing Persona 5 Royal. Do know keeping up with multiple social links puts a dent in your wallet to make maxing them out easier. I'll delve into that later though as it's time expand on this concept.

Ramón appears in the world of Persona 5 after CLH Season 1 events come to a close and halfway through Kamoshida's Palace. For how he ends up there... You can say his heart cried out and something answer the call.

The Castle of Lust Palace definitely isn't a place Ramón wanted to wake up in. You can predict his reaction to what seems to be teenagers being constantly tortured or the obviously inappropriate decor. Thus the Phantom Thieves next infiltration turns into a run-in with a furious Ramón using real tommy guns on Shadows.

(For any oblivious Rayman fans, the action in Persona 5 takes place within the Metaverse. A realm of cognition where someone sees or thinks can become very real. Like realistic fake weapons being able to function similar to the real deal. Palaces are a dimension created when someone's heart becomes heavily distorted and their behavior turns very dangerous in the real world.)

Believing they could help each other, Ren/Joker convinces the Thingamajig to come with them. An arrangement that leads Ramón to join the Phantom Thieves. Since he doesn't have a Persona, the Limbless uses various gadgets to aim for Shadow weakpoints. Ramón's codename will be Enigma as that what he is. Now he has three reasons in why he joined the Phantom Thieves.

The first one is to keep the group from getting into a mess they can't get. Every member of the Phantom Thieves are children who are still trying to find their path in life. He also the only(non-Persona) adult that can help them out in both worlds without drawing a crowd.

The second is to find a way back to Eden. Even though this world's better than the dystopian nightmare he calls home, there are things Ramón has to do. He can't risk losing the only chance to fix Eden's corrupt society especially since his imposter is still on the loose.

The true reason however is redemption. Even if Ramón wasn't directly involved, his obliviousness to Eden's true nature had hurt so many innocent people. He CHOSE to look ignore the red flags and share their propaganda until Bullfrog showed him the ugly truth. If protecting these kids and changing the hearts of the corrupt is something he needs to do then Ramón accepts.

That doesn't mean the Thieves nor their Personas are gonna leave him alone. It isn't hard to see how broken Ramón is. Just like them, he is someone who also became an outcast to society and bears a tale just as tragic.

Thus Ramón gets dragged into so many shenanigans. Whether it be heavily dressed up to walk in public or passed around houses so he always has a roof under his head. Ramón does help which member he's staying with in some way. The Limbless is usually a tutor since Ann and Ryuji aren't the only ones who need help when it comes to their grades.

Sojiro does let him stay after he finds out about the group's identity although it took sometime to get used to Ramón's peculiar appearance. Can't forget a good chunk of older Ren/Joker's Confidants that get dragged in once he maxes them out. Ramón and Iwai would be a terror together though.

Also considering he's an adult, the man always gets dragged in more mature conversations with the team's Persona. Ramón absolutely butts heads with Carmen on multiple occasions and ain't afraid to call her a broad. She thinks its hilarious though thus teases the hell out of him.

Do not leave Ramón alone with Captain Kidd as those two probably have a drinking contest. The Limbless needs to work on handling his liquor healthily if his bad days are proof. And sailors love their booze.

Ramón is a sad drunk kind of guy to me. Thus Arseńe listens to his liquor fueled sorrows and tends to bring tea or water so the hangover isn't harsh. Any info about Ramón's life is heavily filtered since 'cow sushi' is a bit much for their minds.

Zorro makes sure the Limbless doesn't get in over his head. Ramón tends to be quite hotheaded and the Persona knows what trouble can come with unstable emotions. Someone had to keep Morgana out of trouble when it was just them.

The more he helps the group, Ramón will slowly grow alongside them. Forming bonds he never thought would happen and come to terms with his inner demons. It is only when Ramón learns to accept himself completely shall his own Persona emerge.

When it comes to the Arcana, he represents the Aeon Tarot. Fitting since the negative side to this is ignoring the truth and accept corruption like he done as Eden's newcaster. The more Ren/Joker strengthens his bond with the Thingamajig, he'll gain abilities which revolve around combat items alongside counter based techniques.

Ramón's Persona shall be the Almighty Element Augustus, specifically James Augustus Hickey the father of Indian Journalism. My personal take on what his entry could be.

'A pioneer of Indian journalism, James Augustus Hickey launched the Bengal Gazette from Calcutta in 1780. Augustus' writings commented on the inefficiency of the British administration in India. His newspapers served as watchdogs against those in power thus influencing contemporary thought and awoke civic consciousness among the people.'

Things are definitely gonna ramp up since Ramón will gain the abilities that his videogame persona acquired with every Palace he conquers. Our group of high schoolers are about to have a powerful and quite protective parental figure. Also if he could, you know Ramón definitely adopt certain thieves when those moments arrive.

That's all for now! Until next time folks, I'll see you in the crossroads between Leblanc and Eden.

[winslete]

*Hours later*

Leopold: "Alice." *Every muscle in his body tenses* "Thanks for coming." Alice: "I was intrigued. Hell hasn't frozen over, and yet you wanted to talk."

Leopold: "You told me a lot about myself when we broke up, and I let my feelings block the message." Alice: "I know. It's nice that you took this time apart to learn how to be a functioning member of society. Good job. Leopold: *annoyed* "Do you have to do that?" Alice: "Do what, Leopold?" Leopold: "Can you let me finish my thought before you start taking the cheap digs at me?" Alice: "I gave you a compliment. I'm a huge advocate for personal growth." Leopold: "This was a mistake. Forget it." Alice: "Are you sure? The situation you're in must be dire if you're calling me for help." Leopold: *groans* "It is... you're the only person I know who can give an unbiased opinion on me as a partner." Alice: "This is about a girl? I'm a lawyer, not a miracle worker." Leopold: *swallows his pride* "Can... you... tell me... why you feel that way? Was I that bad?" Alice: "I'm not doing this in 0° weather."

*30 minutes later* Leopold: *finishes telling Alice everything* "Now, I'm trying to figure out my role in this. Chy wouldn’t have cheated without a reason.” Alice: "It's simple. You chose women who are out of your league. " Leopold: *he fights to keep his tone even* "If that was the case, then why did you choose to be in a relationship with me?" Alice: "Sex, Leopold. You were a handsome young man who took directions well. Once the fun wore off, I realized that you had no ambition. No aspirations. When you purchased that abandoned shack, I realized you were content working for your parents and staying in Briarwood for the foreseeable future. Leopold: *confused* "Wanting to settle down made you cheat?" Alice: "Absolutely! You use pity as a weapon, and instead of picking some local girl who shares the same sentiments, you go after bright, worldly women. Women, who in five years will be making six figures while you glue together Legos in your parent's car shop.

Leopold: *irritated* "You're such a liar. I never guilted you to stay with me. Hell, I would've respected you more if you broke up with me instead of having him show up at my job." Alice: "I'll admit, James was a little impulsive." Leopold: *resists the urge to yell* "I'm starting to think I give you way too much credit. Alice: "If we can go back to the matter at hand, the common denominator is you. I haven't met your new girl, but it pleases me to know that she's choosing her future over you. Outside of your looks, you have nothing to offer the modern woman.

Alice: "Next time, date a scientist. She can send you back fifty years where the world would be more to your liking." Leopold: "Where is this- Do you feel any remorse for what you did?" Alice: "Why would I? I did what was best for me." Leopold: "So, why are you painting me as the bad guy? Does it make you feel better?"

Alice: *She rolls her eyes* "Get over yourself."

Leopold: " You said you stayed for sex, but I think you cared. I think you feel guilty and are trying to justify your actions. Even going as far as to label me as something I'm not. " Alice: "You're assuming a lot." Leopold: "You're here. You could've ignored me." Alice: *she glances away* "I was in the area for work. This was convenience, nothing more." Leopold: "If you told me you wanted to leave Briarwood, I would've sold the house and had the truck packed. I was always your biggest supporter. I wanted to see you succeed." Alice: *she lets out a dry chuckle* "That's not true. You wanted to change me. Having me live here and spend all that time with your mother. You were planting the seeds, and I wasn't about to let you win that." Leopold: *he faintly smiles* "Cheyenne loves our family dinners. We were supposed to spend Winterfest with them, chopping down trees and watching sappy holiday films." *looks down* "She's nothing like you. I shouldn't have treated her like she was." Alice: "I bet you're happy about that." *sips her drink* " Found a girl with no standards." Leopold: "I've got to go." *leaves money on the table* "Thank you." Alice: "For?" Leopold: "Giving me clarity... I won't contact you again."

Alice: *smirks* "We'll see if Hell freezes over."

*Leo races outside and dials Cheyenne's number*

Leopold: "Hey. Can I see you tonight?"

((After talking to Alice, he finally rolled the want to get engaged to Cheyenne!))