#they have like 9 weeks to do something good and hilarious and things to protect us

[emeraldbabygirl]

Me after finding out the results for the election:

[euphoricfilter]

To Build A Home (Part Eight)

Part eight: Eight and a quarter

Pairing: Ot7 x 9 tailed fox Hybrid! Reader

Fox Hybrid! Jin, Human! Namjoon, Human! Yoongi, Wolf Hybrid! Hoseok, Cat Hybrid! Jimin, Wolf Hybrid! Taehyung, Fox Hybrid! Jungkook

Genre: Hybrid AU || Fluff || Angst || Smut/ implied smut || Strangers to lovers AU || Best friends to lovers AU

Summary: D-Day finally arrives.

Word count: 10.6k

Tags/ warnings: Angst, minimal fluff, mentions of blood, harassment, hybrid mistreatment, throwing up, surgery (kind of), needles are briefly mentioned, briefly described panic attack/ disassociation, a lot of hurt but this is the last time (I think...), if i've missed anything let me know!

Notes: You're allowed to get mad at me. I think a demon possessed me when writing this because the m/c doesn't deserve any of this...

my masterlist

series masterlist

part 9

+++

D-1

You had 30 minutes until midnight. 30 minutes, two quarters of an hour, three 10-minute intervals, 1800 second until your whole life could turn to shit.

Jungkook seemed just as on edge as you, his leg shaking as he sat back on the couch of his living room, palms a little moist as he gripped onto the flesh of your thigh.

You watched Sora as she plugged a ton of wires into her laptop, comfortably sat at the small coffee table. You met Sora an hour ago when Hyerin had showed up at Jungkook’s apartment ready to transfer all needed files into Yoongi and Namjoon’s adoption folder. She was the friend Hyerin had been raving about for weeks.

You were slightly pissed how carefree the girl was, didn’t she know how important this was for you? Why was she making jokes like your whole life wasn’t being held in her hands? What pissed you off just as much was the clacking of her manicured nails against the keys of her laptop, the neon acrylics hurting your eyes as you tried to decipher what she was typing. You didn’t like to judge people based off looks but you seriously wondered how this girl was going to help you.

She hadn’t exactly given off the best first impression, the moment she had stepped through the door she’d started flirting with Jungkook. And you got it, he was undeniably attractive, but the girl didn’t have to pretend to fall expecting the fox to catch her, making a fool of herself when he didn’t even look her way. (Jungkook was more focused on untangling your knotted hair from the nap the two of you had taken, enamoured at how soft you looked in Jin’s pyjamas) He had been a little grossed out when she had just grabbed his arm, gushing about how big his muscles were and how much bigger he was, and how maybe she should adopt a strong, masculine hybrid to protect her.  

He’d smiled awkwardly, seeking you out seconds after she’d touched him to try and rub off the scent of her expensive perfume that hurt his nose. He always had had a sensitive nose and never liked strong scents. From that moment he decided he would stay on the other side of the room from Sora.

“How long have you been working with Hyerin?” you eventually ask, because you’d rather listen to the grating of her voice than the shrill laugh she had. Because her jokes weren’t that funny, but she apparently found them hilarious. It was also undeniably unattractive how she’d try to giggle like a pre-schooler around their crush, her eyes always seeking Jungkook’s attention after she’d though she’d said something funny.

“A month?” the girl wonders and you try not to bash your head against the wall behind you. The last thing you needed was a concussion right now.

Jungkook turns to you with pursed lips, almost a frown but he was doing a good job of hiding his distaste unlike you who rolled your eyes at her answer. Either Sora saw and decided to ignore you, or she was just a full on ditz.

“How long have you been doing this?” you motion to her set-up.

She shrugs, “A month?”

You blink.

Heart sinking because, well this really could be the end of you.

Jungkook pulls you closer to his side, practically moulding you to himself as he just holds you. You would complain that you could feel your bones snapping but a small part of you hoped that by some magic you would just melt and become a part of Jeon Jungkook. They couldn’t take you away if you became one person. Plus, you’re pretty sure the guy could sucker punch a man and dislocate more than a few bones.

Maybe you should have taken Jungkook up on his boxing course that he had spent a good half an hour trying to convince you to take. You’d declined. Although you loved the man, you wouldn’t let him near you with those chunky gloves on even if he did say he would go easy on you. You think anyone else in their right mind would take him up on his offer, but not you. You’d seen the way he tackled Namjoon, and the producer was maybe just as buff as the fox was. You didn’t feel like ending up in the hospital.

However, the boxing class may have come in handy because you wanted to punch Jin in the face. The rest of the boys, minus Yoongi and Namjoon, stayed home, not wanting to overwhelm Hyerin’s friend who they all assumed, yourself included, was some genius mastermind and would make everything okay again. Jin gave you a kiss on the forehead, scratched your ears then shoved you into Jungkook’s car claiming he would see you later without a proper goodbye.

You’d spent the whole day thinking of a nice goodbye speech you wanted to give him because Jin was your world and you had to tell him how grateful you were that he had stayed by your side for so long. However, he didn’t let you have a proper goodbye.

You knew it was because he wanted to believe you were coming home tomorrow afternoon, maybe the morning after at the latest, a small part of him in denial that not everything will go your way. But he could have at least heard you out. You hadn’t sobbed in the shower that morning for nothing.

Taehyung seemed hesitant with the short goodbye, holding onto your arm a little longer after you’d parted, eyes conveying that he wanted to spill his heart out, because what if he didn’t see you again? He’d spent the last week thinking of a poem, maybe a melody or two to give to you before you left, so that you would always have a piece of him with you for comfort if he were to never see you again.

Jimin hadn’t said anything, giving you a bone crushing hug before he shoved you over to Hoseok who smiled a little sadly before kissing your cheek.  

You hadn’t even gotten to see Namjoon or Yoongi one last time either, you’d sent them both a message but hadn’t checked to see if they had replied. You didn’t feel like crying anymore today.

Once at Jungkook’s apartment, the two of you had laid in his bed for the afternoon, the room silent. What had started off as you both laying, looking up at the ceiling from both individual sides of the bed had turned into you face down into his chest, his steady heartbeat grounding you. Because he was still here, beneath you. And that made everything feel… somewhat okay.

You felt like throwing up as you tapped the screen of your phone, large digital clock telling you, you only had 5 minutes until midnight.

“Hey, Sora?” you call the girl, she looks up at you with wide eyes.

“Transfer the other guys’ files before my own, okay?” you say, cringing inside as you see Jungkook’s eyes widen from your peripherals.

He opens his mouth to object.

“Okay” Sora beams.

“Y/n!” Jungkook exclaims, pushing you a little from his side to look at your face properly.

“Jungkook, they can take you away from me forever if you aren’t under Namjoon’s name” you tell him.

“I don’t care!” he laughs in disbelief, “they’ll take you away if you’re last to be adopted”

“But you can get me back” you tell him, “they’ll blacklist Yoongi and Namjoon from ever adopting the 5 of you and then we’ll never see each other again, do you want that?”

Jungkook looks into your eyes, your firm tone taking him aback a little because you’ve never spoken to him like that before.

He shakes his head.

“No. No I don’t want that” he mutters, curling in on himself a little.

“Then trust me”

“And then what? You’re gone.” He shakes his head, “I can’t work miracles Y/n. What if we can’t get you back? What if I can’t get you back?”

“Then you have a good home and a family Jungkook.”

“But it’s not good if you’re not there, don’t you understand?”

“I do but—”

“Clearly you fucking don’t, otherwise you would prioritise yourself. I really like you, really really like you and the thought of never seeing you again scares me” he admits, pain swirling behind his irises as he looks into your own eyes.

“I like you too Kookie, but you have to trust me”

“How can I, when you never tell me anything? If you liked me then why aren’t you being selfish and trying to stay?” he turns to look at the ceiling.

“Kook?” you say gently, hoping to ease the tension between the two of you.

He hums, avoiding eye contact.

“If anything bad happens I want you to come help me okay. I can’t do it alone” you say, watching him turn to properly look at you.

Although you’d learnt the hard way, falling out with Jin all those months ago you really had learnt that it wasn’t so bad to rely on people you trust. You knew there were boundaries, you wouldn’t let your family do all the work for you, but it was okay for them to give you a helping hand when you needed it.

“I wouldn’t let anything bad happen to you, you know that right?” he says, searching your face.

You nod, a soft smile gracing your features. And if Jungkook wasn’t so scared he would tell you how pretty you looked, even with prominent dark circles under your eyes and knotted hair.

“I know” you say, turning to Hyerin who looks at you sadly.

“We’ll make sure everything runs smoothly” she assures, and you nod in thanks.

You flinch when Sora’s phone starts ringing, timer telling you that it was finally midnight. You swallow thickly, fingers tapping anxiously against Jungkook’s arm as the girl starts to type away on her laptop.

D- day

“Well shit” the girl says and your eyebrows furrow because that didn’t sound good.

“What happened?” Jungkook asks, eyes firm as he watches Sora think for a moment.

“Because half of the adoptions are under… Jin’s name it might take me a little longer to figure this out” she says, and you’re seconds away from launching yourself at the girl and smashing her veneers in.

Hyerin winces, coming to take a seat beside you on the couch. She touches your arm lightly, “I’m sorry I couldn’t get someone more… knowledgeable about this. Sora is the only other person in that hellhole that believes hybrids deserve equal rights”

You look at her, hesitantly smiling at her in understanding, “It’s okay, I mean, I’ve been preparing for the worst anyways” you wave her off.

Jungkook bunches your tails into one hand and tugs on them, beckoning you closer. You oblige, giggling as he maneuvers your legs over his lap, his head resting comfortably atop of your own. You close your eyes, indulging yourself in what may be the last moments you have in a pair of familiar arms.

You’d have preferred silence, or even the deep hum of Jungkook’s voice over the clacking of Sora’s nails but beggars can’t be choosers you suppose.

You’re brought out of your daze when your phone starts to ring, confused as to why Yoongi would be calling.

“Hello?” his voice reverberates through the line, goosebumps raising on the skin on your arms.

“Yoongi? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, two men just left Namjoon and I’s place, Jin and the others are driving over just in case they stop by yours”

“I see” you hum, poking Jungkook’s forehead as he tries to listen to what Yoongi was saying.

“You doing okay?” the producer asks, and you hum as a reply, “I’m glad. I’ll speak to you soon, okay? Namjoon’s trying to say something, I gotta go”

“Okay”

And with that he hung up. You drop your phone into your lap, taking a moment to look at yours and Jungkook’s warped figures from the screen of the Tv.

“What’s happening?” he asks, tilting your head so he can see if he can gauge what you were thinking.

“Dae-Hyun and Seung were just at Yoongi’s place, Jin and the others are heading their way. I assume those assholes’ next stop is our place”

Although practically impossible Jungkook attempts to pull you closer into his side. Because suddenly your home was now his. ‘Our place’, his new home. Not the small apartment the two of you were hiding in, your pretty home, with his family.

He closes his eyes, praying that everything would go okay as he lays his head gently on top of yours. By no means was he a religious man, but he was beyond desperate; angry that the best he could do was put the trust in the young woman he had let into his apartment, your fate left in the hands of destiny. Destiny that he had no control over.

It mustn’t have been more than 5 minutes after your call with Namjoon that someone bangs at Jungkook’s apartment door.

You both sit up; you make eye contact with Hyerin who just shrugs. Equally as confused as you. She just waves you off, telling you both she will get the door so you two can stay put.

Your hybrid ears twitch as the door clicks open, head tilting when silence stretches into the living room, expecting to hear Hyerin speak to whoever had shown up.

You push yourself off the couch (Read: Jungkook), and as you turn the corner into the small hallway you freeze.

Dae-Hyun looks smug as he stands in the doorway, Hyerin looking shocked as she looks between the two of them. And you laugh. A hearty laugh because you shouldn’t have ever doubted those two men.

It was impossible for them to have made it over to Jungkook’s apartment from Namjoon and Yoongi’s place in under five minutes, even if they had speeded. You realise that Yoongi had never seen the faces of the two men stood at Jungkook’s front door.

So, they were never actually at Yoongi’s place.

The last time they had visited, Namjoon had opened the door. You’d given a rough description to Yoongi just in case they ever did show up at his place, but even then, you knew that what your mind pictured could be way different than what Yoongi had imagined them to look like. And when he said two men your mind automatically assumed it was them.

You spot maybe 3-4 other men wearing black stood straight behind Dae-hyun and Seung.

One of them pushing their way through the entrance of Jungkook’s apartment to stand in-front of Hyerin, making sure she wouldn’t try and pull anything funny.

Hyerin turns to look at you with a fearful expression, unsure what to do. Not only was she going to lose her job, but you were also going to be taken away. As she tries to slip out from behind the man, he grabs her arms, forcefully holding her against the front door. You just watch, eventually turning to make eye contact with Seung, who looks too smug for your liking.

You don’t flinch when Jungkook’s hand lays heavy on your shoulder, his own squaring up and challenging the small group of men stood at his front door.

You swallow before taking a deep breath. “Well, good morning” you smile at them, feeling Jungkook’s hand squeeze your shoulder, “We should get going, shouldn’t we?”

As you say that Jungkook open his mouth in protest, Hyerin’s eyes widening comically.

Dae-Hyun turns to Hyerin, yellowing teeth on full display as he looks at her with mock pity. “We’ll deal with you later, for now,” he turns your way, “my prize”

You stop Jungkook from speaking with a hand on his shoulder when he leans forward to bark something at the slimy man. You lean up on your tippy toes, still having to beckon him lower so you could whisper something to him. He obliges, bending his knees slightly, eyes still trained on the men that were slowly making their way down the hallway of his home, ready to snatch you out of his grasp. They didn’t seem to be in a hurry, aware you had nowhere to run.

Jungkook lived on the top floor of his building, and there were enough people standing in the doorway it would be impossible for you to escape even if you did try.

As two men stand in-front of you, you ask, “may I have a few final words?” you say sweetly. Smiling when they nod, beckoning you to hurry up because their patience was slowly dwindling.

“Make it quick” Dae-Hyun waves you off, carefully watching your every move.

You turn back to Jungkook, “Call Hoseok right now and tell him Plan B is underway”

You speak quiet enough that only you and Jungkook could hear, knowing his hybrid ears would be able to pick up the soft sound of your voice, too quiet for the human ear to pick up.

You don’t give Jungkook anytime to reply as you outstretch your hands, metal handcuffs clicking over your wrists by one of Dae-Hyun’s subordinates. The other shoving Jungkook away from your side.

You motion you head, an indication that Jungkook should hurry up and tell Hoseok. Jungkook swallows, fighting himself, did he listen to you, or did he go ham on the group of men?

He waits too long, Hyerin clicking the door shut before he can throw the first punch. She didn’t want any more men pushing her up against the wall.

“What did she say to you?” Hyerin asks, hands a little shaky as she turns to the fox.

Jungkook just looks at her and blinks. His mind racing a mile a minute, if he went now, he could definitely catch up to you and fight a few guys off. He hesitates though, because he saw 5 too many weapons that he would have zero chance with if he tried to throw a punch or two.

“Jungkook?” Hyerin waves her hand in front of his face.

He looks down, hand running over his face as he wracks his brain for what you had said, “She said to call Hoseok hyung and tell him Plan B is underway”

Hyerin’s eyes widen as if remembering something, “Hurry up then, before they make it to your human’s house” She pushes him into the living room, scrambling around to grab his phone from the small table beside the couch.

+++

“Who’s that?” Jimin asks as Hoseok’s phone starts to ring.

The wolf pulls his phone from the netting behind the driver’s seat, frowning when Jungkook’s name pops up.

“Jungkook?” Hoseok questions as soon as he answers the call.

It’s silent for a moment, Hoseok’s eyebrows jumping when he hears a choked sob from the other line. He can hear some rustling in the background, heart rate picking up at the lack of response he was getting.

“Hey Jungkook? What’s going on?” he presses, frowning when Jimin pulls the phone out of his hand, putting the call on speaker.

“Hyung, Y/n she—they took her hyung” the younger chokes on a sob, apologising as he takes a deep breath, “She said to tell you, that uhh, that plan b is happening”

“Oh” Hoseok breaths, looking over at Jimin whose tail had stopped swaying, “Hey Jin hyung, you gotta turn the car around”

Jin doesn’t say anything, jaw clenching as he stops the car on the side of the road.

“Jungkook it’s going to be okay, meet us at the restaurant as soon as you can. Don’t hang around your apartment for too long, okay?” Hoseok waves Taehyung off who tries to grab the phone.

“Okay”

“See you soon”

Jin switches off the engine, unbuckling his seatbelt to turn back and look at Hoseok.

“Okay what’s happening?” he asks, eyebrows set in a firm frown.

Jimin shrinks in on himself, because he knew this was only stage one of Jin’s anger. Taehyung looks at Hoseok expectantly from the passenger side beside Jin, eyes wandering over his face curiously.

“What’s plan b?” Taehyung dares to ask, Jin waving at the youngest fox to shut up.

“Right before Y/n left she told me she had a back up plan. Just in case everything went wrong”

…

Jin, Taehyung and Jimin had wandered back inside, not wanting to stretch the goodbye too long. Taehyung and Jimin knew that if they watched Jungkook’s car pull out of the driveway they might regret not giving you a proper farewell. And Jin was in denial that this was going to be more than just a few days excursion that would be solved easily.

Hoseok however decided he would wait. Just to make sure you left the house safely.   

Just as Jungkook had started the engine to his car you had turned to him, saying something Hoseok couldn’t make out. He was confused when you had opened the car door, footsteps light as you stood and looked up at him from where he stood on the highest step.

“Hobi?” you’d said, tone a little heavy. He could see the hesitation in the way you stood, fidgeting with the bottom of Jimin’s sweater.

He’d nodded.

“Just in case everything goes wrong, I’ll get either Hyerin or Jungkook to call you. If they say Plan B then make sure you all go the restaurant you work at and hide there for a few days okay?”

“Why?” he asks, confused as to why the dingy restaurant would be of any help.

“Don’t sweat the details, I just have a suspicion that Namjoon and Yoongi’s place won’t be the safest for a while. I’ve already spoken to the owner of the restaurant, he said he didn’t mind housing you guys for a day or two until everything is in the clear. Please remember no matter where you are, if Jungkook or Hyerin call, go straight to the restaurant”

Hoseok had nodded, eyes not leaving your figure as you slipped back into Jungkook’s car, saying something to make the other fox smile.

…

Jin’ starts the engine, “Text Yoongi about what’s going on, but tell them to stay home”

+++

You wonder how long you’ve been sat in the back of a van. It wasn’t the luxurious transit you were hoping for, the seatbelts were too small, knotted in places so they could only be pulled out so far. You’d have opted out of wearing one if the driver of the van wasn’t a total maniac who clearly didn’t know how to stop a car properly. So now you were left with stiff fabric digging into your stomach, pain searing over your abdomen when they would make an abrupt stop in the middle of the road.

You think that maybe they were doing it on purpose, the snickers of the three men guarding you enough of an indication they got some sick enjoyment out of watching you suffer in silence.

You’d remember their faces and pray for their downfall for the rest of your days.

It smelt gross, like sweaty men and testosterone. You could faintly smell another hybrid, so you wondered if these two men made a hobby of taking hybrids from their homes and transporting them to places further outside the city. You wouldn’t be surprised if they did. And you’d say that their lives were a little bit sad if they spent literal years trying to collect rare hybrids like people did Pokémon cards like they had with you.

Odd bits of rubbish were thrown on the ground, and discarded pieces of uniform flung across the seats. Seats was an overstatement, the back of the van had two small benches facing each other with metal bars welded into the floor and ceiling to section off the driving area to the back of the van.

You’d think they were transporting a criminal.

Your butt had started to cramp up from where they’d sat you on a part of the bench that hadn’t been cushioned, locking your arms above your head from the thin chain of the handcuffs. Your arms were slowly starting to lose feeling from the blood rushing to other parts of your body.

You look at your socks, dirty from being dragged through the small gardens of Jungkook’s apartment building because apparently government officials don’t have time to wait for hybrids to put some shoes on. And you really liked these socks as well, Namjoon had bought them for you, saying they reminded him of you. Small flowers with bright smiles.

They reminded him of you and reminded you of Hobi.

Even as you thought of the fond memories you felt oddly empty. You didn’t know if it was because after years, and months of waiting you technically didn’t have an owner anymore. Sure, he was dead, and had been for a while but still legally being under his name still connected you to him in some way. But now all of that was gone. You had the house, but you didn’t know if you were going back there anytime soon either so maybe this really was the end.

You think that any other hybrid would be glad a contract with a human is done, because now you were supposed to be free, but you didn’t feel good. Maybe it was just your body trying to process that not everything was going your way.

This wasn’t a drama, a book, or a movie where in the next few moments the hero would pop out of nowhere and save you from the evil clutches of two stinky government men. Then you could live happily ever after where trauma didn’t exist, and you could live your life and laugh that you were almost enslaved once again. Jin wouldn’t show up in a funny suit that was three sizes too small and save the day like he always had.

None of your family had secret superpowers, they didn’t know how to get you back and you knew that. You didn’t expect them to know that, but you felt shit knowing that you had no control over what is about to happen to you. Not only that but now Hyerin was in some sort of danger too for trying to help you out. She had been that small spark of hope in your life, she cared about you enough to risk her job, maybe even her life because who knows what Dae-Hyun and Seung are capable of? She’d gone against the government, and you weren’t well versed in the law, but you assumed those two bastards would turn the tables and somehow land the poor woman in prison for the rest of her life.

You feel anxiety fizzle throughout your body as the van stops. The silence doing nothing to soothe you as you wait. You weren’t sure what you were waiting for, maybe for them to stop sitting so still and open the door, or someone from the outside to fling the door open.

Although a selfish thought, maybe you were waiting for these men to start panicking because Jeon buff Jungkook had decided to grace you all with his presence and come take you home.

You’re thoroughly disappointed then the back door to the van swings open and its Dae-Hyun stood there.

You felt like throwing up.

You felt like crawling out of your own skin as three pairs of hands grab you, either holding you down, unlocking your handcuffs or unplugging your seatbelt. Eventually they haul you out of the van, not caring as you trip over your own feet a couple of time as they drag you up to a large building.

All you can do is watch Dae-Hyun’s back as you’re pulled through a set of automatic doors, goosebumps spreading across the expanse of your body from the air-conditioning blasting through the vents.

An older woman sat behind the front desk turns her nose up at you, muttering something about the smell of wet dog tainting her workplace. You choose to ignore her comment, unsure of the consequences that would follow if you decided to snap back at her.

You could feel the bile start to surface up your throat, arms twitching in anxiety as the reality of the situation sets in.

Seung raises a key card with his face on it to a small metal pad, the lightly blinking red before lighting up green. You’re brought further into the building, eyes screwing shut when you hear the thick metal door clank shut behind you. A reminder that you can’t escape, and that leaving this place would be near impossible.

+++

Jin pulls Jungkook into a tight hug, his hands firmly rubbing over the other fox’s back. Jungkook continues to cry, holding onto Jin like a lifeline, worried that if he let go of the elder, he would disappear before his eyes like you had.

Taehyung looks at Hyerin, who gives a forced smile to the fox.

Hoseok watches everyone sat around a few of the tables of the restaurant.

“You all better get upstairs, it’s not safe down here” the owner of the restaurant calls out to the everyone.

“Thanks, Hyung” Hoseok pats the shoulder of the older man, helping Jimin stand who had his head held in his hands.

Everyone treks upstairs, Sora still babbling on about something that none of them were paying attention to.

Hoseok leads them to one of the empty rooms, smiling a little at the pile of blankets.

“We didn’t have any spare mattresses” the restaurant owner explains.

“You’ve already done enough, thank you”

Hyerin ushers Sora to sit down, yanking the girl’s laptop open.

“You work as fast as you can, okay? I don’t care about your last hair appointment; I don’t care if you don’t want to lose your job you shut up and fix all this, okay?” Hyerin seethes, watching Sora’s eyes widen in alarm.

She nods, typing away at her laptop.

Taehyung smiles over at Hyerin, although she can see the anguish behind his calm façade.

“We’ll get her back, don’t worry”

Jin nods at her, a small appreciative smile on his face as he lays Jungkook down. Jimin slips back into the room, no one noticing he had left.

The cat brings a bottle of water over to Jungkook, “Kook, you’ll get a bad headache, drink some of this”

Jungkook snivels, frowning up at Jimin, who brushes the younger boy’s hair from his forehead.

“We’re all worried, but I doubt Y/n wants us to mope around. Once things are in the clear for us, we’ll help as much as we can”

Jungkook nods, pushing himself up and taking the water from Jimin.

“Thanks, Hyung” he whispers, and Jimin smiles albeit a little sadly at the younger.

Jin pushes himself from the floor, “I’m going to get some air from the window down at hall” he announces, waving Taehyung off when he offers to go with the fox.

Hoseok just holds onto Taehyung’s shoulder, shaking his head as Jin slips out of the room.

He stands by the window at the end of the long hallway, the air was anything but fresh. The outside world opposite the restaurant another building, alleyway between them covered in warm, damp rubbish.

The sound of the other hybrids that resided here not helping him clear his mind at all. He can’t hear any noise from the room his own family is staying in, all of them either silent or speaking quiet enough they wouldn’t be heard over the laughing of the other residents.

Jin closes his eyes, head falling back to rest on the walls.

He wonders if you’re okay, if they’re at least treating you somewhat humane.

He wonders if you’re still travelling to wherever they may take you, he didn’t know if you were leaving the city or if they were keeping you close to home.

He’d image you were scared, never being so far away from home on your own before. And then he worries you’ ll have a panic attack and he wouldn’t be there to help you through it.

He knew they didn’t know that you didn’t like the room too cold, or that loud noises are often irritating to your hybrid ears. They probably didn’t care.

What if you got hurt and they did nothing about it?

He wondered if they’d let you call him, or if he could call you. Maybe then he could tell you that everything will be okay. Even if he himself didn’t believe it would be.

What if, what if, what if.

What if he never saw you again?

He was selfish enough to believe that nothing bad could actually happen to you and didn’t even give you a proper goodbye.

Did he say ‘I love you’ that morning? He did every morning, but he can’t seem to remember saying it to you that day.

He could have called you that afternoon and asked if you were okay.

He could have done so many things better.

He should have insisted he stay with you. Why would he let you go like that?

He should have been in Jungkook’s place. He would have made sure that no one laid a finger on you.

Jin blinks, looking down at his hands. Small pearl like tears shining in the orange light of the streetlamps.

He was tired.

It had been such a long day. He hadn’t slept last night, and it was well beyond midnight, nearing sunrise. He must have been awake for 24 hours straight at this point. The coffee he had chugged the moment Yoongi had called him that two men had left his house now slowly wearing off.

Jin slides down the wall, pulling his knees up towards his chest as he rests his head on them. And he cries. He cries quiet enough that no one would be able to hear it over the laughter of the other hybrids that worked at the restaurant.

His chest tightens as he thinks about how scared you must be. How alone you must feel. He isn’t sure if he’s shaking because of the cold night air that howls through the window that is cracked open, or if he’s shaking because he’s scared.

He’d promised you; he’d promised all those years ago when you had first stepped into his home, such a small child, that he would take care of you. That you didn’t have to worry about how scary the world is because he would keep you safe.

He wonders if you have the same look on your face as you did the first day he’d met you; a look of pure fear, so much distrust from such a small human. An emotion that a child your age shouldn’t have felt. It had taken time, but you’d opened up to him and he’d never felt the way he had back then when you first smiled at him.

He still feels that way when you smile his way, a warmth blooming throughout his body, what can only be described as love, coursing through his whole being.

Jin fears that his love for you is useless when you are so far away, a place where he can’t reach. Where he can’t come to your rescue like he had when you were younger. He can’t come and patch you up when you fall, and he can’t mend the emotional hurt you were surely going to get. He’d seen you break down and fixed you up time and time again, but he fears that you were too far gone for him to come and fix you again.

+++

You stare at a small, rounded pebble, trying to figure out exactly how you felt.

Angry was definitely one of them.

You wondered how people got away with treating other living beings so poorly.

Initially you’d assumed they’d at least give you a room to sleep in, but apparently ‘animals stay in cages.’

You’d been confused by Dae-Hyun’s statement, almost laughing because surely you were stupid to assume this man was going to treat you like a feral animal. He’d sat down and had at least one civilised conversation with you. He knew you weren’t feral. Sure you’d snapped at him a few times but that was completely justifies because he was an asshole.

And then he’d opened a door.

It looked like a medieval prison; cells sectioned off by metal bars.

None of the other hybrids made eye contact with you, all of their head hanging low. A few facing the wall, ignoring that a new member of their little club was being forced into a cage. You’d considered trying to kick one of the men holding you in the balls and soon decided against it when you saw guns strapped to their waists.

Once the door to the cage had been locked, Seung had looked down on you, throwing a piece of fabric through the bars. ‘Change into these before we get back’

And so, you changed. The closest thing you could describe the attire as is a hospital gown, after looking around a little you’d figured out everyone else was wearing one as well. At first you were a little worried changing in such an open space, you felt too exposed, squirming for a good 5 minutes before you realised that everyone was trying to sleep and the last thing they cared about was your half naked body.

It wasn’t the most comfortable accommodation either, the thin mattress in the corner of the cell had springs poking through the top and the floor was grossly damp. But it was okay as long as you were left alone. You’d probably be able to stay somewhat sane if you never had to see those two assholes again or forced into doing something you weren’t comfortable with.

You don’t know how long you’d been sat there. It had felt like hours but that might have just been because you were extremely bored. Too on edge to sleep, hyperaware that anyone could barge through the door at the end of the hallway and do anything they wanted to you.

You wondered if Jungkook had ever called Hobi, wondered if they were all huddled up in the restaurant. It was probably a lot warmer than it was in the basement of the hybrid sector.

You wondered if any of them were thinking about you, or if Sora had finally figured out how to transfer adoption files. You’d be able to rest easy if you knew that your family would be okay. But you assume you’ll never really know.

You hadn’t asked if you were allowed to call anyone but looking at your current circumstances you doubted they’d let you pour your heart over the phone.

“Young miss?” a rough voice caught your attention.

Turning your head, you made eye contact with an older man. He looked frail, skin pruning and pale, like he hadn’t been in the sun for years, nor had he eaten a proper meal in months.

You noticed the third dog ear, flopped over his forehead, your nine tails slowly swaying behind you in anxiety.

“Yes?” you whispered back, and he smiled warmly at you.

“I have some bread left over from supper if you’re hungry” he pushed himself up off his mattress, wobbling slightly as he hobbled over towards your cell with a plate.

“It’s okay Mister, you should keep it” you wave him off, “You might need it tomorrow”

He holds onto the bars that separate your cells. “My stomach can’t ingest bread anymore, you can have it” he urges, skeleton like fingers slipping through the bars to place the bread onto the ground of your cell.

You look up at him, wobbly smile on your face as your eyes well up with tears.

You push yourself to stand, taking long strides to stand before the man. You take his hands into your own, closing your eyes.

“Thank you, Mister”

When you open your eyes, he’s smiling down at you.

“I wish you luck in here, young miss. Life doesn’t always treat people like us the fairest” he pats your shoulder, “I suggest you get some sleep; they’ll probably start examining your body tomorrow”

You look at the old man for a moment, letting go of his hands and nodding.

You wet your lips as you plop down on the mattress, cringing as a spring pokes your behind.

By the time morning came you’re not sure if you’d slept at all, it hadn’t felt like you’d slept much when the door to the basement bangs open. You jolt up, eyes squinting at the fluorescent lights that flick on as footsteps echo throughout the room.

The old man smiles at you reassuringly, a shaky thumbs up, but you guess it’s from old age and not nerves.

You watch as a slice of bread is haphazardly thrown through the bars of each cell, each of the hybrids scrambling to eat their food.

Once the guards get to your cell, you look at them expectantly. One of them unlocks the door, both of them easily slipping inside. They both grab an arm, and you grit your teeth at how tightly they held you.

The old man gives you a sympathetic smile as they drag you past his cell, a few of the other hybrids watching with pitiful eyes as they chew on the stale bread they were given.

Your stomach churns in a mixture of anxiety and hunger.

You supposed you should get used to the feeling; they clearly weren’t generous with meals, nor did they seem to give you a warning when they would be taking you out of the cell. You wondered how long you’d last before you’d want to chew your own arm off.

+++

The general check-up was nothing too crazy. A young lady weighed you, measured your height, asked questions about your diet, if you knew the name of the facility you had been sent to after being born. If you’d had any children yourself, personal questions like how many people you’d slept with, when the last time was, if you were to have any children how many do you think your body would be able to handle.

You’d been thrown back into your cell after that. The same woman coming in after a while and asking you to drink the gross smelling pink liquid from the cup she had handed you from the other side of the bars.

Your nose had scrunched up in distaste, the liquid tasting metallic. It was a little sticky, so the taste stuck to the roof of your mouth and was somehow amplified when you tried to get rid of it with the stale piece of bread the old man had given you last night.

You fall back on the mattress, counting the cracks on the stone ceiling. When you close your eyes, you can see the faint outline of Jin smiling down at you, his fingers gently brushing over your cheeks.

The hissing of the wind from under the door at the end of the hallway suddenly sounded like Jimin whistling as he skipped around the kitchen, his pretty eyes turning into little moons as he asks you to try some of the pudding he had made, knowing you always had a sweet tooth.

Maybe if you thought hard enough, you’d be able to replace the awful tasting liquid with the gooey cake Jimin had made for you last week. You remember Yoongi smiling a lot that day. You wonder if he’s smiling that wide now that he had one less hybrid to deal with.

+++

“I don’t think we can leave anytime soon” Jin tells Yoongi, said producers head held in his hands, “The girl trying to transfer our files is having a hard time because half of the guys’ names are under my fake ID”

Yoongi hears Namjoon sigh from the other side of the room.

“We’re not having much luck either, those cars have been parked out front since last night” Namjoon explains, running his hands over his face in exasperation.

“A few more had arrived this morning as well” Yoongi adds, glancing at the window that showed the front of their home.

“I don’t suppose you’ve heard anything from Y/n?” Jin asks, hopeful.

Namjoon and Yoongi look at each other. Namjoon opens his phone, shaking his head as he stares at the last message, he’d sent you yesterday afternoon.

“No, sorry. We both last heard from her after she’d messaged yesterday afternoon but hasn’t checked your messages back. No calls either”

“Hyung, does Hyerin know where they could have taken her?” Namjoon raises his voice, hoping the fox would be able to hear him from where he was stood.

“She has an idea, but she can’t go into work. Things got complicated once those two bastards had seen her helping Y/n over at Kook’s place.”

“Shit” Yoongi pinches the bridge of his nose, “If these guys out front let up, we can try and help”

“How are you guys doing?” Namjoon asks, mildly concerned at how quiet it was.

Usually when he called you it was loud, Hoseok having no control over the volume of his voice of Taehyung’s laugh reverberating down the line. But it was oddly… silent.

“Jungkook is beating himself up over not doing anything, even though nothing could have been done. Apparently, a group of guys with weapons came to collect her, none of them saw Hyerin’s friend so we’re still in the clear. Everyone else is just… trying their best to keep their chins up. There isn’t much we can do when cramped up in a small room. I think everyone is worried because we don’t know what is going on” Jin explains, and Yoongi can hear the clear exhaustion in his voice.

“Hyung, remember to rest as well” Yoongi reminds Jin, frowning when he gets a low hum in reply.

“I’ll keep you updated, text me if anything happens”

Yoongi looks up at Namjoon once the call disconnects.

The younger of the two producers giving his Hyung a woeful smile.

“I really want to do something to help” he says and Yoongi nods in understanding.

He worries about you. A lot.

A small piece of his restraint is slowly carved out of himself as each minute passes with no news about your whereabouts.

“Just wait a little longer” Yoongi reassures, ready to just power through the group of men sat outside his home.

He wonders how you knew this would happen. That a group of Dae-Hyun and Seung’s subordinates would camp outside of his home, ready to take away the unregistered hybrids. Not only would they be sent to hybrid facilities, himself and Namjoon would probably have been arrested for illegal possession.

He guesses the media had already started speculating what could be happening, the plethora of blacked out cars in front of his and Namjoon’s home enough to raise suspicion in his neighbourhood alone. He hadn’t looked online, not wanting to know what was being said about himself, the articles didn’t exist if he didn’t look at them.

Personally, he believed that his level of fame shouldn’t warrant this much public coverage. He could easily walk out in public without anyone recognising who he was, but he supposes the small group of people that didn’t like him needed to tarnish his reputation somehow. And what better way than speculating rumours.

Namjoon hadn’t bothered to check his phone other than to check if you had texted him back or called him at all, not ready for the possible hateful comments they were sure to get.

+++

You think you must have dozed off at some point, the exhaustion of the night finally catching up to you.

The old man had told you that you must have been asleep for a good portion of the day after you’d been thrown back into your cell after the overall check-up.

It was hard to tell how long you’d been in the hybrid sector, with no windows in the basement it was hard to gauge what time of day it was. You had to rely on your body clock, assuming it must be either lunch or supper time because your stomach had started to grumble, not used to being empty for so long. Especially now, where Jimin seemed to produce a dish every couple of hours for you and Taehyung to try while the rest of your family was working.

You missed the snacks he would make as well, giggling as he’d place the apple slices on the table, carved to look like small bunnies. Taehyung had joked once that Jungkook looked and acted more like a bunny than he did a fox. Jungkook had huffed, complaining that he could be a sly fox if he really needed to be, and that Taehyung acted more like an overgrown puppy than a wolf.

Maybe the lack of sleep and stress was slowly making you delirious, it had become easy to imagine the thin slice of dry, stale bread was actually the fluffy bread Jin had learnt how to cook last year, perfect for the vegetable stew he would cook with your homegrown vegetables.

Stew sounded good.

Actually, anything sounded better than dry bread.

Your hybrid ears twitch when the door at the end of the hall clicks open, tails stopping their movements as footsteps draw closer to the end of the hallway where you resided.

You don’t bother to look up when two men stop and stand outside your cage. You hear the keys jingle before the lock clicks open.

“Get up”

You do as told, pushing yourself up off the mattress. Briefly you make eye contact with the old man, a weird sense of dread running through your body as he mouths a quick ‘good luck’.

Your head turns to look at the two men dressed in uniform, pulling your arm away, towards your body when they try to grab you.

You look between the two of them, “Where are you taking me?” you ask, voice a little shaky as you back up into the wall.

One of them rolls their eyes, lunging to grab you but you slide down the wall, curling into a ball.

“Stupid mutt” one of them tuts as they yank you off the floor.

You yelp, head spinning for a moment at the sudden movement.

…

You could feel the anxiety crawling throughout your body, the low hum from the vents the only distraction from your mind completely breaking down. You’d count the second between each small sound, holding your breath before relaxing because it wasn’t the door to the room opening.

When it did eventually open, you didn’t look up. You couldn’t. But you felt your whole body shiver at the onslaught of new smells wafting into the room.

You’d been laid belly flat on an examination table, arms chained to the side of the bed, ankles shackled to the table and a thick metal collar around your neck so your head couldn’t lift up.

Any anxiety you had was amplified when the heavy pair of footsteps stop. You can see the shadow of a person stood beside your legs.

You struggle, trying to free at least your arms when you hear the rattling of a trolly being pushed into the room. It clacks against the tiled flooring, and you grunt when a heavy hand strokes the top of your head.

Seung, the creep, bends down so he can look into your eyes, “Try to relax yeah? This will end a lot sooner if you just sit still”

You yelp when you feel someone else tug at your tails, hands running across the fur. Tugging each of them apart to look at where they all connected at the base.

Instinctively your tails flick away from the unknow hands. The fur flaring up, making your tails look bushier than usual.

Seung tugs at your hybrid ears, “Stay still” he grits. And if you weren’t so petrified for what was to come you would have snapped back at him.

But you could hear the clanking of metal tools being tosses across the steel trolly.

When more than one pair of hands start pulling at your tails, tears well in your eyes. You don’t know if you’re crying because you’re scared, there’s too much going on or you just really wanted to go back to your somewhat ignorant life with your family, possibly a mixture of all three.

The reality of your situation finally sinking in.

You really missed them.

Its silent for a moment, your ears can pick up the slow puffs of breath from what you guess to be 3 other people in the room. But your brain is too muddled to discern what exactly was happening. You were trying not to panic. Trying to breathe normally and stay calm, but that was starting to get hard.

Seung stands straight, “get to work” he addresses the other people in the room.

Your eyes widen as the buzzing of the electric razor fills the silence of the room. And you struggle, legs and arms pulling at the chains.

You ignore how tender your skin feels as it rubs back and forth across the coarse metal, teeth sinking into your bottom lip as you yank the chains. Hoping that the adrenaline coursing through your body would give you enough strength to snap the metal.

“Stop please” you cry as someone grabs your tails.

You feel their fingers card through a couple of them, picking one of the longer ones before tugging it closer to their body.

You feel a second pair of hands bunching up the rest of your tails, pulling them away from the one that had been separated from the bunch, giving whoever had grabbed the first one enough access to get to work.

“No, no, no” You continue to cry, ignoring the sting of the rashes on your wrists and ankles.

Someone slaps the back of your thigh, holding your legs down. And you sob.

The sound of the electric razor starts up again and you start to sobbing harder. Wailing as you feel the fur to one of your tails slowly drop to the floor.

You snivel as the sound of the razor stops, cringing as the cool air hits the bare skin of one of your tails.

It’s quiet for a moment, and you think maybe its over. The muscles in your arms twitch slightly from the adrenaline, fight or flight instinct kicking in. Your fingers twitching a little as you try to process the feeling of your tail being a lot lighter than it had before, plus multiple pairs of arms grabbing you where you were most sensitive.

Your breaths come out in short bursts, and your head feels a little dizzy at the lack of oxygen.

You jaw slackens when a searing pain shoots down your spine, whole body trying to seize on itself but failing when you tug at the restraints again.

“I don’t think we cut off enough” you hear a feminine voice, “We might as well get more while we’re here”  

“No, no more” you choke, feeling bile raise in your throat.

They ignore you, shuffling around your body as another pair of arms come to hold down your lower half so you don’t flail about to much.

You let out a cry of pain as the same searing feeling shoots across your body.

You feel the weight of where your tail once was drop, a soft thump as it hits the ground. Not only had they cut it once, but they’d gone in a second time.

Tears cascade down your cheeks.

They’d cut your tail off.

Your mind blanks.

They’d cut your tail off.

You don’t notice when one of the nurses tut when you throw up, parts of the snacks you’d eaten at Jungkook’s place who knows how long ago resurfacing. You don’t even realise the food had made its way back up until you’re almost choking on it, trying to breathe properly.

They’d cut your tail off.

You inhale in short intervals, whole body practically vibrating in a mixture of pain and panic.

They’d cut your tail off.

The small pinpricks of needles poking through your skin felt like nothing compared to the pain the lower half of your body was experiencing.

Everything else felt like a blur, you could briefly feel a nurse bandage up what was left of your tail, a small stump of flesh and muscle. You could feel how your other tails were soaking in the blood that would have likely spurted where they’d snipped your tail off.

The cotton they placed on the inside of your elbow felt too itchy, bandages covering it too sticky.

When they unlock your ankles and wrists, you don’t move. Can’t move. No matter how much you chanted in your head for your legs to pick you up and take you away, you couldn’t.

You think you’re looking at yourself when a tall man picks you up. The reflection in the two-way mirror didn’t look like you. You looked tired, a small trail of sick dripping down your chin, mixing with your pearly tears, staining the collar of the hospital gown.

Of course, that was you in the reflection, no one else had nine tails.

Your eyes flit to them.

Oh. The person in the reflection only had eight and quarter tails. Even a quarter seemed generous for the stump that was left.

Maybe it wasn’t you?

Maybe this was just a crazy dream.

You felt bad for them, they looked tired. They looked like they needed a warm bath and a long hug. They needed to rest.

You register that it was you. The reflection really was you. They had tears falling down their cheeks just like you did, their eyebrows were furrowed in pain just like yours were, and although your eyesight had gone a little hazy, you could see the sad sight that was you. Staring pitifully back at yourself from the reflection.  

Before you can get a proper look at yourself, the man carrying you makes his way to the door.

You see the small test tubes of your own blood. You cringe at the state of the examination table, just as bloody as your pristine white fur was.

You try not to close your eyes. Knowing that you would probably pass out if you did.

You try to remember the direction to the basement, so if you ever got the opportunity to escape, you’d know a way out. But the directions kept getting jumbled. Your mind reeling back to the unexplainable pain your body was feeling.

It was nothing like you’d ever felt before. Worse than when you’d broken an arm when you were younger, worse than anything you’d wish on your worst enemy.

You register than you’d been placed on the mattress back in your cell. And you briefly register that the old man was looking over at you in pity.

You want to tell him to stop looking at you like that. But your mouth wouldn’t open. Talking felt like it would hurt too much.

He watches your crystal tears slips from your eyes. Hobbling over he stands in-front of the bars that separate the two of you.

His eyes trail to the mess of your tails, floppy against the mattress. He frowns at the poor bandage work, how blood was already seeping through the thin layer of linen. He notices how unfocused your eyes are and wonders how much it must have hurt to have such a sensitive part of your body brutally snipped off.

“I used to have four ears” he says, not sure if you heard him or not.

He watches your eyes flick up to look at his face, so he continues, “At least you have eight more, yeah?” he motions to your pile of tails.

You close your eyes. Swallowing another sob as you try to pretend you aren’t in pain. If you ignored it long enough then maybe it would go away. If you ignore what he said, then maybe your ninth tail would grow back.

You’d never been fond of your tails; it had always made you stick out like a sore thumb. Always the butt of others’ jokes because you were different.

They’d always been in the way, always were more work. Made showering longer, and drying them took forever.

But Taehyung though they were pretty.

And Jimin like to brush them.

Hoseok liked to bury his face in them.

And Jin had always adored the way they made you look.

Maybe this was one of those moments where you never knew you missed something until it was gone. You really had hated them for so long. But you’d started to accept them. Because your family loved your tails. So why couldn’t you?

Jin had explained that tails should be a point of pride. That you shouldn’t be ashamed. Because they made you, you.

If you thought you hated them before you sure as hell do now.

You missed home.

You missed your family.

Maybe you were too optimistic, maybe they weren’t coming for you. Maybe they were finally free, like a bird. Like you’d always wanted to be. They all deserved the best life and you’re happy you could provide that for them. Jin could finally rest, he wouldn’t need to work anymore now that he had the inheritance money and house that was fully paid for. Namjoon and Yoongi would have one less problem to deal with as well.

Having your tail cut off could only be the worst they would do to you here, so you could rest easy now. Surely, they’d treat you a little better, leave you alone like they’d left the old man beside you alone. You wouldn’t mind the slices of bread, or the mattress even if it was soaking up your blood, if only they would leave you alone.

You had all you needed. The memories of what once was enough to keep you going.

And if you really thought hard enough, you could feel the ghost of their touch soothing you as you curled up on the old mattress. Warm hands running across your cold skin. You could see each and every one of their smiles, and that was enough comfort for you finally close your eyes and rest.

+++

“Done!” Sora shouts, startling everyone awake.

They all scramble to crowd around the laptop, eyes reading over all of their information under Namjoon and Yoongi’s names.

Jin almost drops his phone as he pulls it out of his pocket, Jimin having to hold his hands for a moment to help him stop shaking as he calls Namjoon.

The younger producer picks up almost instantly, Jin giving him no time to speak.

“Everything is clear, get ready to leave. We’re bringing Y/n home” He scrambles to grab his car keys, cursing as he knocks his head on the wall.

Hyerin unlocks her phone, fingers deftly typing a message to Yoongi with all the legal documents he would need.

Her eyes scan over your adoption papers, biting her lip in thought. She looks down at Sora, “You’re still in that hybrid activist group online, right?”

Sora nods, “yeah, why?”

Hyerin waits until all the others have left the room, “We might need their help” she gives the girl a knowing smile.

Today, she’d bring you home.

[gumnut-logic]

Wire (Bit 18)

Bit 1 | Bit 2 | Bit 3 | Bit 4 | Bit 5 | Bit 6   | Bit 7 | Bit 8  | Bit 9  | Bit 10

Bit 11 | Bit 12 | Bit 13 | Bit 14 | Bit 15 | Bit 16 | Bit 17 | Bit 18

This is the end, technically, but I need to write an epilogue to tie it all up, so one more bit :D

As always, thanks to @tsarinatorment and @janetm74 for the read through. I was a bit nervous about this one. I’ve had to jam it into so many tiny snippets of time, that it felt patchy and wonky. I’ve been assured it is okay, so hopefully you enjoy it anyway.

-o-o-o-

It took some time and some exhausting work on Virgil’s part, but eventually he could sit up and Scott arranged a press conference. Apparently, it was against his better judgment and he wanted Virgil to wait longer, but it had already been over a week and the presents kept rolling in.

So with a handmade Thunderbird Two themed beanie on his head to hide the mess of bandages and mangled hair - it had been Scott who flew in their barber to tidy it up, but the result was definitely still beanie worthy - he prepared to face the media.

Gordon respected his hair, but the beanie was definitely up for grabs on the joke front.

Virgil claimed he was just jealous he didn’t have a Thunderbird Four version. It turned out even more hilarious when Virgil discovered that the beanie did have a Thunderbird Four partner...that was tiny and barely fit his handmade doll.

Gordon was very put out.

Virgil made a point of wearing the fan made hat along with a blanket to hide his belly - who had time to make him an entire blanket? Again, green with red tassels, thin yellow stripes and a white number Two in its centre.

He might have gotten a little over-emotional over this one.

He was blaming the painkillers he was on.

Stupid drugs.

Scott, with Gordon and Alan on one side and John on the other, pushed Virgil’s hoverchair down the hall. Gordon had declared he wasn’t missing this for the world and Alan agreed. John, Virgil suspected, just wanted to keep an eye on him. His space brother had been hovering a little and it was odd John would voluntarily attend such a public gathering.

Virgil could count John’s attendances to this kind of thing on one hand.

But it was good to have all of his brothers with him. After all, they worked as a team.

As for himself, he wanted to do this, but it wasn’t easy. His health was something to be reckoned with. Scott wasn’t far wrong. His brain wanted, but his body didn’t have the resources to deliver and a simple thing like getting into the hoverchair in the first place was frustrating and exhausting as all hell.

The moment the doors opened to the pandemonium outside the front of the hospital, he realised just how much he was asking of himself.

But he was going to do this, goddamnit.

The lights from holorecorders and flashes from cameras were blinding. A sharp word from Scott dulled it all down a bit, but the noise of so many people and the brightness of the day along with those still determined to photograph him was overwhelming.

“You don’t have to do this.” Scott quiet voice in his ear was ever so protective.

“Yes, I do.” And Virgil forced himself to face the people.

Fortunately, by the time they made it to the podium and his brothers sat down beside him, the majority of the crowd had quietened down, eyes pinned on Virgil, waiting for him to speak.

But it was Scott who spoke first, dressed in his suit, impeccable as always. Virgil had a suit jacket and loose shirt on, but that was all he had been able to manage. He looked like an idiot, but hopefully a dedicated one at least.

“Good morning. As promised, my brother Virgil is here to speak with you. As you can see, he is on the mend and we are ever so happy to have him back with us. He would like to make a statement.”

And Scott turned to him.

Virgil fingered the torn-out page of his sketchbook with his notes on it and looked out at the crowd. The media hovered expectantly at the foot of the podium staring up at him, but beyond that were the group of people that he had come here to speak to. Most were average, likely interested townsfolk, but in the centre there was a swath of green clothing. Several held signs and placards that said things like ‘Get Well Soon, TB2’ and ‘Thunderbirds 4ever’. There was even one sign that declared ‘We love you, Virgil!’.

These were the people responsible.

The mic stared at him.

He pulled on the speech training they had all had and straightened his shoulders the best he could.

“My sole purpose of speaking to you today is to thank all of you for all your support and for all the gifts that have been sent to me. I wanted you to know that every gesture is valued and...” He placed a hand on his heart. “...I am ever so grateful.” Said heart was doing a royal dance behind his breastbone. He pushed a smile onto his face. “I would particularly like to thank Gavii for the hat. I needed it.” The smile became a grin. “Kat’s playlist was a beauty, and JB’s TB2 was an utter delight.” He looked down, his mind rifling through all the gifts he had been given. Looking up, he stared across the crowd to the bunch of green people in the centre. “If I named all of you, I would be here all day, but I wanted you to know how much I appreciate and value all your contributions. I will be passing the majority onto those who need them much more than I do, but I will keep your well wishes in my heart for all time.” He drew in a shaky breath. “Thank you.”

Scott’s eyes were an intensity off to his left. Gordon had already placed a hand on his arm from his right.

Now what he had wanted to say had been said, exhaustion was having a good go at winning the war. He knew this would happen, but screw it.

His eldest brother shifted in his seat. “I would like to express my thanks alongside my brother. We are very grateful for all the support shown to Virgil and our family during this difficult time. International Rescue will be returning to operation as soon as possible.”

“Who will be flying Thunderbird Two?”

Scott eyed the reporter at the front of the crowd. “Plans are in place. IR operational procedure is not what this conference is about.” The commander’s protective nature regarding the secrecy of their organisation automatically coming to the fore.

“It won’t be the same without you, Virgil!” A woman in the midst of the green patch yelled across the crowd. The people around her murmured agreement.

Virgil twisted his lips, the need to defend his brothers foremost in his mind. “My brothers are quite capable of providing our services without me. You can be assured of that.”

“I have to agree with them on this one, Virg.” Gordon’s fond smile shone at Virgil and then across the audience. “It won’t be the same and we are all looking forward to having you back.” That hand on his arm squeezed tight.

Virgil’s lips had to curl into a smile.

“Three cheers for International Rescue!” It was yelled at the top of someone’s lungs and suddenly the crowd was cheering like crazy. Virgil’s name prominent, but also the other brothers, all topped off with a ‘Tracy, Tracy, Tracy!”

Beside Virgil, Gordon jumped up and joined in, Alan not far behind him. John smirked and Scott tried to stay serious, but his eyes were sparkling.

Cameras started flashing again, holo-recorders buzzing around, but despite the overwhelming noise, Virgil’s smile just got bigger.

-o-o-o-

Next

[anagentinwriting]

Lifeline - Part 6

Summary: (First Responders!AU) Moving to Los Angeles and living with your brother, Thor, was never part of your plan nor was being a 9-1-1 dispatcher, but plans change when you are faced with your own emergencies. In your case, it was leaving behind a relationship that wasn’t as perfect as it seemed. Will this be the fresh start you were hoping for or will your past find a way to catch up with you?

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Odinson!Sister Reader

Word Count: 2800+

Warnings: Angst, Fluff, Language

Lifeline Masterlist / Main Masterlist

A few days after your stroll with Steve, you finally had a day off of work, well, more like the next three days, which was a relief. Taking a stool at the kitchen island, you let the hot mug warm your hands. It was a long night with nightmare after nightmare resulting in little to no sleep. You would have slept in, but today is the day you were signing your lease. It was time to stop using your brother as a crutch and get back out into the world by yourself again. Now, all you had to do was tell Thor.

You blew the steam off your mug, hearing Thor come barreling into the kitchen, patting you on the shoulder before grabbing a mug from the cabinet. He has a huge smile on his face, pouring himself some coffee.

“YN, you will never believe what happened yesterday? It was marvelous.”

“You got laid?” you yawned, rubbing your eyes. How he never looked tired still bothered you. I mean, his energy was always way more than you could handle. It was like he was from a different planet sometimes. 

“Yeah, well duh, but besides that?”

“What happened?”

“Steve, you know, Steve--” you nodded your head slowly, wondering where he was going with this “--He rescued a dog from a burning warehouse, and now he has adopted it and called it his own. Here look at the pretty boy.” Thor reached for his phone in his pocket and showed you a picture of the dog. It looked like a golden retriever mixed with something else, but you couldn’t place it. “Steve named him Cosmo.”

“Aww, he’s cute. How did this even happen?”

“He heard a dog barking, ran inside, rescued it, and then got his ass chewed by Danvers. It was hilarious,” he chuckled. “Steve was like the building isn’t clear and Danvers was like don’t you dare, but then he was like blegh and took off--” he smiled, shaking his head to himself. “--once Steve took off, Bucky went right in after him. I tell yeah, those two are like two peas in a pod.”

“The adrenaline makes you do crazy things sometimes.”

“Yeah, but still, crazy morons.” He shook his head. “How are you doing this morning? It sounded like you had a rough night, and not to be harsh, but you look kind of terrible.” He pointed his finger at you, waving it over you as your mouth dropped open.

“Thanks so much for that uplifting compliment, brother.” You rolled your eyes, unable to hide the annoyance in your voice. “It’s fine, a few nightmares here and there, but it’s a take it day by day kind of thing, right.” He nodded. “But there is something I wanted to talk to you about?”

“What’s that?” Thor asked, taking a sip of his mug. “Darryl, my good man, good morning.”

“Good morning to you both,” he nodded at each of you. He grabbed a mug from the cabinet, stepping over to the coffee maker, which Thor was still standing in front of.

“What did you want to tell me?” Thor asked, not even noticing Darryl trying to get some coffee.

You sighed, rolling your eyes. “Thor, move. Darryl wants coffee.”

“Sorry pal, I didn’t see you there.” He smiled, patting him on the shoulder, and moved out of the way. 

Darryl nodded his head at you as if to say a silent thank you. He filled his mug and took the stool next to you. Thor watched him the whole time before his eyes connected with the clock.  “Oh, shit, is that the time. I have to get to the station.”

“I’m moving out,” you blurted out, forcing Thor to stop dead in his tracks and face you. 

“Ahhh...what?”

“I’m moving.”

“No, you’re not. I don’t want you to move out. Darryl--” he pointed at him “--Darryl doesn’t want you to move out.” 

You turned around on your stool to look at him. “While Darryl has been sleeping and living on the couch for the last three months.”

“Darryl doesn’t mind. Do you, Darryl?”

“Well, actually…” Darryl started, but Thor cut him off. 

“Darryl, please stop talking--” Thor held up his hand at him “-- I am trying to have a conversation with my sister.” He turned back towards you. “What if he finds you? Who is going to protect you?”

“I don’t need your constant protection. I can handle myself; besides, I started training with Val, and she has been teaching me a few things.”

“Really? Like you were protecting yourself when you were married to that guy for what...6 years. Yeah, real fine job you did protecting yourself there.” You glared at him, shaking your head. “And what about when you had your breakdown a couple of weeks ago, or how you just told me you’re having nightmares.” You bit your tongue, trying to hold back what you really wanted to say to him.

“Well, I am gonna leave you two to it,” Darryl started to stand up.

“No, Darryl, sit and stay,” Thor stated, forcing him to sit right back down. Darryl stared wide eyes at you and nodded to himself. This must have felt like torture to him, similar to when a friend is getting yelled at by their parents, and you’re like this is a nice wall.

“Darryl, it’s fine. Go and get ready for work.” He stood back up from his stool.

“No, Darryl, sit back down.” He sat back down.

“No, go, Darryl, you have to get ready for work.” He stands up and swiftly walks out of the kitchen to the living room, grabbing his suit and rushing towards the bathroom. 

“Darryl doesn’t even work today?”

“Yes, he does. If you would ask him a question now and then, instead of making him do your chores.”

“He likes doing them.”

You roll your eyes, shaking your head. It was like arguing with a child; once he sees something shiny, he changes the subject. You stood up and took a deep breath. “Thor, I’m moving. I found this cute little one-bedroom condo a few blocks from work in a great neighborhood. It sits in a nook with two other condos and has a top-notch security system. There’s even a neighborhood watch, and the price is too perfect to pass up.”

“But why move when you’re not ready to be out on your own again.”

“You’re the only one saying I’m not ready. Thor, I need to start living for myself again; instead of using you as a crutch that I constantly fall back on.” He shook his head. “It’s the next step, and I need to move forward.” You bit your lip, marching past him towards your room.

“I bet Loki would agree with me,” he yelled down the short hallway.

You stopped dead in your tracks and turned on your heels to face him. “That’s where you’re wrong, brother. He sided with me on this one--” you pointed to yourself  “--he wants me to move on and get my own place. He wants me to FIND myself again, but you...you don’t. You don’t know what it was like living with someone you thought you could trust. Someone you thought loved you and then...then he--” your voice cracks “--forget it, you’re not even listening to me.”  

“Sometimes, you’re just as stubborn as Loki.”

“Well, he is my favorite brother, and that shit is bound to rub off on me sooner or later.” You turned back on your heel and slammed your door closed. 

“THEN, WHY DON’T YOU GO MOVE IN WITH HIM THEN,” Thor yelled, hearing it echo down the hall to your room. 

You bit your lip and swung the door open. “MAYBE I WILL, OR BETTER YET, I'LL JUST GET MY OWN PLACE,” you replied, slamming the door again. 

_______

“Steve, I need to tell you something,” Bucky grunted as he bench pressed with Steve spotting him. 

“What’s that pal?”

“There is this girl, while more so a woman than a girl, but I’ve seen her on more than one occasion if you know what I mean.” Bucky put the barbell back on the rack and sat up on the bench to switch out.  “And man, she’s something else. At first, when we hooked up, it was, I’m not gonna lie, it was hot. The best I’ve ever had. I won’t tell her that because she’ll get all cocky about it, but now I am starting to wonder if I’m the best she ever had, you know?” 

“Buck. I don’t think you’ve ever talked about a woman like this before. It’s almost like you’re catching feelings for her.” Steve leaned down on the bench as Bucky started spotting him. 

“No, I’m not; besides, what do you know, man?” Bucky scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Last I heard, you didn’t know a thing about women.”

“Yeah, well, they can be complicated, but you’re telling this to the guy who was married before,” he chuckled, getting fifteen reps in before sitting up. 

“Why do you always use that line? It's not fair because I have no comeback to it.”

“That’s why I use it,” he chuckled as Bucky shook his head. “It shuts you right up.”

Steve glanced over when he heard a door slam from the locker room. Thor stomped out, wrapping his hands angrily for the punching bag. He grunted, cursing under his breath. 

“Hey, you alright, Thor? You’re really taking it out on that punching bag?” Steve asked, looking over at Bucky, who had a smirk on his face from watching him. “Thor, what’s up?” Thor made a face at them and continued to beat up the bag when the alarm blared, forcing them to stop everything, suit up, and get into the truck.

“Alright, gentleman, it sounds like we have a lady stuck in a donation bin. We have word she has been in there for at least 3 hours, and on this hot day in Los Angeles, best guess it is well over 100 degrees in that metal container. We will have to work quickly to get her out, so here’s the plan…”

______

On-site, Steve got out of the truck and followed Thor to one of the gear hatches. A few news crews were already on the scene along with a crowd of people watching from the barriers the police set up. He sighed, rubbing the sweat off his forehead. It was a scorcher today, and the inside of the bin was only going to get hotter for the woman trapped inside. 

“Steve, I’ve noticed you have a way with words,” Thor admitted, trying to find the saw.

“I have my moments,” he smirked with a half shrug.

“My sister wants to move out,” Thor confided, scratching his beard before grabbing the saw. “She found this condo.”

“Isn’t that a good thing?”

“Yes and no,” he sighed, following behind Steve to the donation bin where Val was talking to the woman inside.

 “Hey, boys. Her name is Maggie Lang, and she’s conscious, but she’s burning up. She’s sweating profusely and feels like she could pass out at any minute, and judging by the increasing heat index, it is not going to get any better, so let’s hurry this up.”

“Maggie, go to the other side of the bin as far as you can and cover up with this jacket," Steve advised, handing her his fireman's jacket. "This will protect you from any of the flying sparks while we cut the hinges off." Steve stepped away from the container, shooting Thor a quick nod.

“Ready,” Thor announced as he turned on the saw and started cutting the door hinges. Everyone backed away, and after he got the last one sawed off, the door creaked, falling to the ground. Maggie was holding onto an ugly rabbit stuffed animal, looking very flushed and dehydrated. Val and Sam ran over to check on her.

“Whoa, you went in there to save that ugly thing,” Sam asked, smiling down at the toy.

“It’s my daughter’s,” she breathed.  “My ex-husband got it for her, and I accidentally threw it in the donation bin.” 

_______

Steve started carrying equipment back to the truck when Thor came up next to him. “The thing is, since you’re new…newish, you might not know that YN was married.” Steve widened his eyes at him. “Technically, she still is married, but she left him and ended up on my doorstep.”

“I see,” Steve added, narrowing his eyes, stuffing the equipment into the hatch.

“It wasn’t a happy marriage. It was destructive and took an emotional toll on her, both mentally and physically.” He ran his hand through his short hair. “I don’t think she’s ready to be out on her own yet. I mean, how is she even going to protect herself if he comes around?”

“Think you’re underestimating her man?” Thor stopped what he was doing, furrowing his brows at him. “She got out. She left him. Leaving those toxic relationships is the hardest part. Besides, hasn’t it been three months? If he knows where she is, why hasn’t he come around.” Thor nodded. “You should be proud of her and encourage her. She is moving on and trying to make a new life for herself without her ex.” 

“But my point is, she’s leaving again, and I don’t want us to lose touch like we have in the past. She’s always been close to Loki, so with me getting to know her again has been great.” 

“It’s not like she is moving back across the country, Thor.”

“I know, but we had a fight recently, and she said she was going to either move out or go back to live with Loki.”

“She probably didn’t mean it; besides, if she moves into the condo, you can go visit her anytime you want. YN is building a new life for herself, and you should be proud of her.”

“You’re right, Steve.” He patted him on the shoulder, a huge grin hitting his features. “I am proud of her. I should talk to her after this.”

“Yeah, you should.”

“You sound like Bruce. He is really good at giving advice.”

“Bruce?”

“He is the one that popped my dispatcher cherry. I’ll tell you the story sometime.”

Steve chuckled. “Sounds great.”

_______

You sat on the couch with Darryl on the other end, flipping through the channels, hoping something good would show up. Earlier today, you went and signed the lease on the condo, and you could start moving in tomorrow. It was a big step for you, and you were going to take it whether or not Thor supported you. You needed to do this for yourself.

“YN,” Thor shouted, entering the house, making you jump a little on the couch.

“In Darryl’s room,” you yelled back to him. Thor came in and stepped in front of the television, so you couldn’t see the screen. “Excuse me?  We were watching that.” 

“Are you positive you want to move?” He stepped over the coffee table and sat on it. 

“Yes. I signed the lease earlier today, and there's nothing you can do to change my mind.” 

“Great, that’s fantastic,” he nodded, giving you a thumbs up. “I don’t want to change your mind. I want you to do it.”

“Really?” Your eyes widened, then narrowed with suspension. “Why the sudden change of heart?” 

“I realized I was being childish,” Thor admitted, and you nodded in agreement. “I want you to be happy, and if this is what makes you happy, I’m with you, but are you going to be okay living by yourself?”

“I don’t know,” you shrugged, making him narrow his eyes at you. “But I have to try, right? I 

mean, the only reason I do feel ready is because of you.”

“Me, why?” 

“You convinced me to start over and make a new life here in LA. You took me in, kept me safe, and he still hasn’t come around. Sure, he called the one time, but that was it. I was scared when I left, but you helped me feel safe again. I still have a long way to go before I start to feel myself again, but I am getting there with your help and the friends I have made here. To be honest, I don’t think I will ever be fully ready to be out on my own, but the hardest step is taking that first step.” 

His face broke out into a huge smile. “I’m proud of you, sister, and I’m sorry about earlier.” 

You smiled at him and leaned over, pulling him in for a hug. “You’re forgiven, and thanks for everything, Thor.” You pulled back from him. “Oh, one more thing, I’m moving in tomorrow.”

“Great...yay...so soon,” Thor pulled you in for another hug, squeezing you tighter. From the quick glimpse you saw in his eyes, he wasn’t ready for you to go, but you loved how he was trying to support you.  

“So, I can have my room back, now?” Darryl asked from the couch.

_____

AN: Thanks for reading Part 6! She is finally moving out!! And Darryl just might get his room back! When I was trying to figure out who Thor's roommate should be, I instantly thought of Darryl. I mean, he technically is Thor's Earth roommate, right! 😂😂 So, Bruce popped Thor's dispatcher's cherry....kind of makes you wonder what went down, am I right? 😉🤔 And what about that teensy tiny little comment Steve made, any ideas what might have happened there?! Anyways likes, reblogs, and comments always welcome. Until next week...thanks again!

[s-stamper]

My Beyblade Ships over the years plus some reasons (in no particular order):

Ray/Rei & Mariah/Mao: The pairing is cute, they have a history as well as chemistry, and even though the dub tried to erase a good chunk of the insinuations, we all saw it and its potential. Didn't ship them for too long (because I was 11 going on 12 at the time) but I liked them overall.

Oliver & Enrique: Even at 11, I seriously thought Oliver had a liking for dudes, especially that blonde Italian who gave off so much sass he could open his own boutique. (With Oliver helping him run it of course.)

Johnny & Kai: This was one of the rather strange pairings my pre-teen kid-mind came up with. Why? I think it had something to do with the fact that the two were both loners and came off as "angry at the world". So, common ground? But, once bratty Johnny beat Kai at Robert's castle I was livid. (Haha!) Little me hated him and was THRILLED when Kai got his revenge. That snarky, confident smirk-laced, golf line still makes me laugh to this day.

Tala & Tyson: 12 year old me saw that Tyson had won their match and changed Tala for the better. So... Feelings mayhaps? The answer, heck no. That notion only lasted a week. Haha!

Kai & Hilary/Hiromi: Now, onto V Force, I was 12 and (at first) HATED Hilary. She was bossy, bratty, and all the worst parts of a person! I KNEW girls like her. Nice or not, she was a whiny pain. When she called Kai "Cute," I was pissed. How dare she steal my man?! (Omg my kid-self was obsessed with him and that embarrasses me nowadays. So much cringe... Oof.) Anyway, I reminded myself this was both stupid and it was a cartoon so I moved on to shipping them. Yes I know, very weird... The Island is what did it. Blame the gentlemanly chivalry from Kai. 😍 Then I jumped overboard...

Kai & Ray: V Force started this one. I think it did for lots of the fanbase. Namely the Saint Shields Arc. So much tenderness and caring on Kai's part. I now see that arc as a "guys just being bros" kind of thing. Alas, like Ray & Mariah, it didn't last too long.

Onto G Revolution, I didn't really have any big pairings for this season.... Kai & Rick (because power and domination), Kai & Hiro/Hitoshi (because of that one scene at a lighthouse where Hiro told Kai how easy he was to see through and Kai didn't like being pinned down), and then there was Kai & Miguel (again, someone was overpowered by somebody so crushing). Also, Ray & Mystel (because that one scene where Mystel fell out of a tree and Ray caught him as I saw it back then, "bridal-style"... Still so cute, but it's merely a kind gesture from one stranger to another.)

What the bit beast was wrong with me at 13?! Think I unknowingly had a kink then. 🤣

8. Amidst all the oddness that was those I did have a normal one.... Max & Kai: Unlike everyone else, Kai actually did something to aid in saving Max's reputation after Barthez ran it through the mud via the media. It may have only been with a shout with a threatening undertone, but it conveyed a lot. Including SHOWING how deeply he still cared for him despite the side of the dish he was standing on. It was sweet, big brother protecting little brother at its finest, and I so wished for more of it... Still do kind of.

9. Kai & Tyson/Takao: (I didn't know what Yaoi was back then. I didn't learn that until I was 15 when I saw Gravitation for the first time.) Anyway, their match in G Revolution was what sparked that one for me. I've always loved the mythos aspect of the show but reading more about Suzaku and Seriyu's tales made me like the idea. I believe the show is meant to follow the warrior/rivals for eternity dynamic, but the (possible) lovers' tale (especially given the fantastic visuals) seems to somewhat come through. While I wasn't sure what to think at first, given what we know of the two's journey VS what we're given, it comes off that Kai's in love with Tyson and doesn't know how to process it given that he's 15-16. Kai's literal obsession with once again defeating him (remember the monolog we hear and Kai's absolute reluctance to settle for a tie) adds to it too. Even in the BEGA Arc, it came across that Kai would do ANYTHING to face Tyson, and it had to be ONLY Tyson. No one else was good enough. Even Hiro stated that it was unhealthy for Kai to obsess the way he did. Granted it was all while calling him "old news" and a weakling but it still stands. More "evidence" of Kai possibly having some feelings for Tyson is his first match with Brooklyn. We learn that Tyson's existence not only gives Kai purpose but saved him in more than one way, inside and out it seems. Ray and the others had been there too yes, but it seems that no one has impacted Kai's life more than Tyson.

My other range of "over the years" ships include but are not limited to:

Kai & Julia, Kai & Wyatt/Yuuya, Kai & MingMing, Crusher & MingMing, Ray & Crusher, Ray & Salima, Kai & Queen or King, Kai & Tala/Yurily, Kai & Spencer/Sergei, Tyson & Hilary, Kai & Robert, Max & Mariam or Emily, along with Kai & Raul, and Kai & Mariah.

Phew! I'm sure there's more buried deep somewhere that my tired brain could conjure up, (manga, crack pairings, etc,...) but it's super late. So.... Byeeeeee!! (2:32AM, wow!) 🤣

[vidalinav]

Nessian Headcanon #12: Family Edition

Since I keep seeing baby headcanons I wanted to make a list of my own :D which I’ve briefly touched on in other posts but...

Cassian and Nesta have a boatload of children (5 at the end of it all I think). The others start joking that they’re building their own army. But what really happens is that they end up taking in many children over the years because they travel often with the work they do and they see so many conditions and there’s wars and all sorts of circumstances. It’s inevitable that kids don’t have homes but they have a giant house and unending resources and the House is like a big nanny itself so they think it’s fate. 

Nesta is actually the one who brings most of the children home. The first one is a 9 year old girl, who is the angriest kid alive. Has something to do with the plot of a story I’m writing, but Nesta is basically entrusted with this kid. She’s the grand niece of someone she ends up knowing and she’s pretty magically powerful so her family would have ate her alive, so she’s asked to keep her safe and whatnot. Her name is Magda but she goes by Maggie. She does not like Cassian whatsoever in the beginning, and she is horribly rude to Nesta. But Nesta does not care at all, she’s like okay get it out, say worse. Like she’s so chill, because she knows how it feels to be that angry. Maggie and Nesta end up being really close to the point where Maggie does not like being away from Nesta and gets very protective of her even to other members of the IC. She’ll fight first and ask questions later. Cassian and her form a bond actually not by fighting at all, but because Maggie does so many experiments that end up going awry. She’s a fae and has got magic up the wazoo and she’s a book nerd, and she’s kind of a trouble maker, and Cassian thrives. He loves her because she’s like a smaller more diabolical version of Nesta. The House is amused by their antics usually. 

Nesta ends up getting pregnant for their second child and this kid is the only one they actually have on their own. Her name is Lyra, and Maggie thinks that it’s hilarious that Cassian lives in a house with all girls. Maggie is about 12 when they have her, and Maggie at first does not take kindly to Lyra, because she starts feeling like they have their own family and she’s just the kid who eventually is going to have to go back to her other family (because that’s a plot too that I won’t go into to) but they try so much to include her, because Maggie is their child. No question. Nesta ends up telling Cassian that she’s pregnant by giving him an enchanted painting, which is the work of all three Archeron sisters. Elain for seeing what the child would look like, Feyre for painting, and Nesta for enchanting it so that if they have more children the picture will get bigger and there will be room for Feyre to paint the others. So one big family portrait. In that picture, Maggie is tucked in between the two with the baby/toddler. Dark hair, big blue eyes... maybe hazel. Maybe one of each (I’m really not sure). The best parts of both Nesta and Cassian though. She’s so gorgeous. Prettiest little girl. But yeah going back to Maggie, they ask her during this picture time (probably solstice present time) if Maggie wants to be an Archeron. (Another headcanon for another time, but Cassian marries Nesta too and becomes an Acheron). So, does she want to do this? Absolutely, and at this point she already start calling them mom and dad and just referring to them as such, so that’s their kiddos. 

Third and fourth are siblings. They’re from the continent. Maggie is 14, Lyra is close to 2. The siblings are brought by Nesta who is doing some thing that I cannot say because I have not made it up yet, but she finds them at the scene of a Massacre in hiding. The oldest is close to 6, the other is probably 1-ish. The oldest will not let them take the baby from her. The baby is a boy. They don’t speak the common tongue, which is any issue, but they hire a tutor to both talk to the little girl and then also to teach them ALL (everyone in their household) the language that the two siblings speak as well as teach them how to speak the common Prythrian language. So everyone ends up learning. The little girl is taken under the wing of Maggie, who is the perfect older sister/camp counselor as she likes to refer to herself after there’s more kids. They don’t know her name for the LONGEST time, because she won’t speak at all, but she ends up loving Cassian because he makes her laugh and he brings her a thousand stuffed bears because at one point she won’t stop crying and he brings them home and makes funny voices with them, and carries her on his shoulders, and she has the sweetest giggle. But eventually they end up naming her Ursella which she ends up going by Ella when she gets older, because her nickname with Cassian is little bear. They do ask her later when she talks if she remembers her old name and her birthday since they don’t know, but she doesn’t say that she does, which may be a lie, but Ella happily goes by Ella, and they give her a choice to choose one random day in the year to be her birthday, but she chooses to celebrate her birthday on the day they brought her in. She calls it her re-birthday.

The baby boy they name Nico. It’s actually a common Illyrian name and Cassian knows that the little boy is technically not Illyrian but it is his first son, and he really wants to give him that piece of him. Cassian does ask him when he’s about 10 if he’d prefer a name that’s based on his own culture, because they make sure that’s very integrated in their home life, because of course Cassian loves his culture and Nesta has that anthropological eye, so she knows and learns so much and they just love their children so much that they want all of them, every piece that they come with. But Nico likes his name, and he’s his dads through and through. But he LOVES Nesta. He’s a momma’s boy for sure, which I guess just makes him similar to Cassian. He does not like learning though, so Nesta usually has to teach him herself instead of having tutors, and she spends extra time with him going through his lessons. Lyra and him grow up together closer to age, so they pick on each other A LOT, but ultimately they grow up to have that relationship like I can pick on you but no one else can. They’re super close. If you want one, you find the other. They both will be together somewhere making a mess of things. Ella is the one who usually is like would you please be loud somewhere else. She ends up getting into music--playing instruments and so she generally prefers quietness to study and practice. Violin is her forte. 

The next boy comes about 4 yrs later. Maggie is 18, Lyra is 6, Nico is 5/6 ish. Ella is 10. The boy is about 12. He’s Illyrian and Cassian finds him this time and takes him to Nesta first, but Nesta is like why are you asking lol this is our new son. He’s a “bastard” unfortunately. I hate that word. But he has learned to fight, Cassian found him in the fighting pits in an Illyrian camp a couple hours away from Windhaven, and the situation was so much like his except this kid was never given a home like he was. So, he spent a good couple of weeks trying to get on his good side enough for him to trust him and to want to go someplace safer and warm. He hates Cassian a lot at first... while at the same time being like you’re the hero I’ve heard about. So admiration but also a touch of resentment and anger at the world. Cassian doesn’t know what to do with that, because still to the day he does not handle emotion like Nesta does. He understands it but he doesn’t know what to say, what to do, his go to is always training, but training is not what this child needs. So again, this is Nesta’s forte. Interestingly enough, she’s very gentle with kids. She’s empathetic, soft, but not condescending. She gives everyone the same respect so it helps a lot when he sees that and he’s never had a mom before who tucks him in or makes sure he’s feeling well. His name is Julian. I forgot that part and it turns out he’s HATES fighting. But he really likes plants. So he ends up spending a lot of time with Elain when she visits. He’s fascinated by them and ends up having his own garden. But because Nesta is magical in this headcanon (because she’s more witchy in my fics) he learns A LOT about poisons. Not because Nesta teaches him, but because he finds her books and reads them and starts growing them. This becomes a problem, because when Julian doesn’t like his tutors or teachers, he starts trying to poison them. Like not killing them, but he knows which will give stomach aches, which will give rashes. Nesta is both proud and reprimanding. 

I do feel like they might have more, but I don’t know for now I feel this is good for their set family. Five in total for their first gaggle of children lol. But all of them are asked if they want to be an Archeron. All of them say yes. All of them have each other’s back even if they have screaming matches on the daily. The house is mostly chaotic at all times but the House loves having people in it and laughing and being filled to the brim with stuffed animals and train sets and plants and music and family members coming in and out since Nyx visits often because he’s an only child for a very long time with Feyre taking more of a position in court rulings and Rhysand just being generally busy because you know High Lord/High Lady stuff. I don’t see Feyre being a stay at home mom but I also don’t see Rhys being a stay at home dad, but they’re also rulers so I peg them for both being working parents, which they feel guilty about A LOT at first, and it’s something that they struggle with in the confines of their own identities and their relationship, because they love Nyx and they know they’re parents but that’s not all they are, and without having the gender role of one parent staying home it’s very difficult for them to both rule, but Rhys does not want to stop being a high lord and Feyre is bored too often and she wants to rule and she knows she can, and she has that title for a reason and wants to utilize it. So it’s a hard time, with lots of arguments, but Nyx ends up mostly going with Cassian for a good amount of the day when he’s older and they have more kids in the house, and Nyx doesn’t really know that Feyre and Rhys had this problem, because he’d just prefer to be around the other kids and it ends up working really well. 

Cassian ends up being more of the stay at home parent. I don’t know why but I feel he just gives me that vibe where forget the courtier business, if there’s no war and if the armies are generally taken care of which he does, he wants to stay home and raise his kids, which is very surprising since he’s the one who doesn’t ever take vacations. He wants to be there for every moment no matter how awkward or loud. That’s his family and he’s waited so long for them, and it’s not even about him not having that family early on, it’s because he genuinely would rather be with his kids. He’s the one who as soon as they got the siblings was like I’m going to have to take a step back, because he saw his kids every day but he just didn’t want to be away for long periods of time, and at that point he’d already taken several steps back on working, so it became more of a done deal then. He still is the general, but he gives more responsibility to Devlon and to other people he’s trained over the years to step up. So generally, Cassian will work a couple of days a week for a couple of hours or just go quickly in the evenings, go over reports if the kids are in class with their teachers, and more during certain times of the year, but he’s generally more of a family man. 

Nesta in my fic/headcanon ends up being a queen as well as a leader of the witches and the founder/leader of the Valkyrie and she owns a shipping company and she’s the cauldron’s guardian which don’t ask me to explain, it’s in this fic I’ve barely written. But she’s a “I can bake the cake and eat it too” type of person to me, and because of her magic it is easy for her to do it all because it’s like a full time job. She goes home after a certain hour and she’s back with her kiddos, and most of her jobs have other people who have a handle on things as well. So she’s not an island, but she loves having the purpose and the drive, because as much as she did like being in the library and being in Velaris and having that day to day slice of life, she likes and yearns for adventure. She’s a go-getter and is not necessarily ambitious for power, but she’s got the whole world to discover and she can have anything she’s willing to work for. She wants to be and see it all. Cassian is endlessly proud of her and is like that’s my mate, my wife. My mate. My wife. And they both end up getting what they want without having to sacrifice their own ideals. Their marriage is a collaboration and it ends up working phenomenally for the two of them and their children. 

But ultimately it’s really the House that makes it possible. Because who cooks food and cleans and supplies every need and wish and whatnot? The House. Who baby proofs? The House. The House is like I’ve always wanted a big family and boy does it get a big family. 

[toorumochi]

100 OTP QUESTIONS: KaruShuu!

Hello! (´｡• ᵕ •｡`) ♡ I wrote 100 OTP Questions about KaruShuu, and I'll post them here! I'll divide those into 4 parts, here is 1/4, hope you enjoy! ♡

1. Who loves flower crowns more? - Karma is a cutie who makes them, BUT Shuu is legit a blushing mess when Karma puts a flower crown he made on top of his head

2. Who is the one who likes to cuddle? - Both like to cuddle; Shuu especially but doesn’t want to show his needy side

3. Who has awful taste in music? - Lmaooo both have because one day Shuu goes from Classical music, and then suddenly heavy metal for the next week and Karma just watches him while listening to Kids shows openings. (Sofia the first is his fav)

4. Who is the meme lover? - Karma would legit cry when he sees smth hilarious and Shuu is a grandpa and doesn’t understand memes at all so Karma made a notebook called “Memes explanations for Shuu”.

5. How did their second date go? - Surprisingly, it was good, since they were still in Junior High when they started dating, it was sometimes awkward but they quickly opened up to each other and had much fun. obv since Karma is a part of the date, it’s chaos but Shuu secretly enjoyed it, Shhhh~~

6. How many children do they want/have? - ...Oh my God-  Okay let’s get one thing (not so straight bc they are gay lol):

They both would be amazing parents okay? AMAZING 👏🏻 Shuu would not force their kids to get good grades since he knows that the pressure can literally break people, and Karma would be the chill dad BUT very protective and will make sure that his kids eat well and are happy. (PLSSSSS- I LOVE THEM) Oh and about how many kids, it would be fun for them to maybe have 3? Like so cute, Imagine them having like a moody teen daughter that even tho Karma and Shuu don’t force to have good grades, she will still try to get them and she isolates herself in her room often and Karma and Shuu don’t mind bc ‘teenagers’, but they still make sure to have some fun with her like taking her out with her siblings to amusement parks, restaurants and other stuff that is fun <3

7. Who hides the weapons? - Karma hides them bc !!!!Jesus !!! Christ !!! a sleep!!! deprived!!! Gakushuu!!! after !! work !!! is something over and beyond anything that Karma can handle

8. Who is the better dancer? - Shuu but when they dance together they are perfect <3

9. Do/Did they have a theme wedding? - Lmao imagine ‘Sofia the first’ themed wedding; Shuu would kill Karma if he did that; or even better, a ‘Shrek’ themed wedding pls-

10. What do their parents think of them dating? - Who tf gives a damn about GakuHOE, he ain’t allowed to say SHIT or I’ll throw hands; as well as Karma's parents they better stfu or I’ll throw them into a blender

11. Are they a super sappy couple? - Oh yeah for sure sksksk

12. How did they get together? - Depends on what fanfic I would be basing these questions on lolol but, I would say they got together in High School bc

“A rival like you is hard to find” ~Shuu

“Oh? So Rivals to lovers?” ~Karma

“Yea” ~Shuu

13. Who asked the other to get married? - Karma would bc okay yea he can cook and shit but let’s be real, he wouldn’t survive a day without Gakushuu, also the proposal would be fancy

14. Who stays up too late and makes stupid jokes? - KARMA!!!

15. Who is the nerd? - Shuu, bc even when Karma tells jokes, Shuu gets confused and hits him with facts and Karma tries to stop by saying “Nuuu Shuu that’s a joke, a joKE-”

16. Who knows the most obscure facts? - Karma lolol

17. Who makes the other a flower crown? - Karma would and as said in the first question, Shuu would be a blushing mess

18. Who likes to read? - Both do, but when Shuu starts to read a book or so, ain’t nobody better disturb this man or Karma will throw hands 🔫

19. Who bothers the other person while the other person reads? - Karma once disturbed Shuu and he almost died; but Shuu does disturb Karma when reading bc well- let’s say he wants something important, something uh- well, very specific. (Di-)

20. Who tutors the other? - They both do, once Karma makes smth Shuu doesn’t know so he teaches him, and as well as the other way around

21. Do they have similar taste in movies? - Lmao nah, but it’s fun that way bc they get to explore what the other one likes (Karma stans ‘Shrek’)

22. How do their personalities complement each other? - Perfectly, they might think differently, but as said, they fulfill each other <3

23. How do they tell everyone that they are going to be having a kid/adopting a child soon? - OHHHH OMG OMG THIS:

Karma would probably make a big party in revealing that they are adopting, and like invite his friends, Rio obviously lol, Terasaka, Nagisa, Kanzaki and so on and like skskskksks pls he would be so excited and maybe at first it would be a normal dinner or so, and then he reveals that they are going to adopt and like everyone freaks out (in a good way), especially Rio pls omg, chaos

24. Who has better fashion sense? - Omg, pls, them, them as fashionable parents- omg pls this:

Them going out for a walk or so with their kids and people mf taking pictures of them bc they think they are models or sum and their teen daughter getting all embarrassed pls this would be amazing

25. Who will punch someone out if they are rude to their partner? - KARMA GO GET THEIR ASS, THEY HURT SHUUS FEELINGS

Hope you enjoyed the 1/4 of the 100 OTP Questions :D ♡

[violet-t-9]

Check in on my (not very realistic) wish list for episode 139

1. Nobody dies in the potential battle against Lucien/the Somnovem? I will be fine with temporary unconciousness but please nobody actually dies? Will they even fight? What was going on with the cliffhanger? I have so many questions!

Hey nobody died! Nobody even went unconscious. Can't believe we have a part 2 to this epic boss fight. This showdown is awesome! At least we know what will happen next episode.

2. The group uses their new eye powers for something (group telepathy will be hilarious, especially accidental) or just in general goof off with their new eyes.

NVM we are doing the boss fight right now

3. Beau or Caleb discover more new eye functions that we have not seen before (antimagic cone anyone? Does the eye location have any meaning? Lucien’s was also on the chest right?)

NVM we are doing the boss fight right now. If the locations mean anything, so far it's not revealed.

4. We get to see more of the party members’ new powers/abilities since they levelled up and got a long rest! Let’s gooo.

MOTIVATIONAL SPEECH thanks Cad. It's a new power we haven't seen before! Caleb knows gravity fissure now, apparently! Fjord and Veth also considered using new abilities before the break. Jester used contagion on Lucien! It was a nice try.

5. They get some sort of contact with/update from the material plane (i.e. their family, Yussa, or anybody else I guess just not Trent please), it’s been a while I wonder what’s going on over there. Has Jester’s parent trap succeeded fully yet? Has the assembly been investigated yet? Has Yussa figured out what the Nein did with his emergency exit gift? How are Yeza and Luc doing in the crime bar? Is the Dynasty looking into Essek? So many possibilities.

NVM we are doing the boss fight right now

6. The M9 succeed in stopping the city from going to the material plane and find a way to potentially destroy it by the end of the episode.

It appears that them plane shifting the crest away actually does ensure that the city cannot return to the material plane, that's great news! Also, I assume destroying Lucien would be a good first step to destroying the city.

7. Beau and Yasha continue to fight like the power couple they are and to indulge in PDA in the flesh horror city (because why not). Bonus: we find out Yasha’s plans for Beau’s red cape/the cape is used by Beau in the episode.

The discussion between Beau, Yasha and Veth LMAO. Oh NO Yasha is fighting Beau again - that natural 1 though! The miss! Another natural 1! The power of love!!!! Yasha also used the battle cry to protect Beau!

8. Fjord and Jester continue to be domestic and supportive of each other in these trying times because they are great. Bonus: more Sprinkle/Artagan mentions or interactions.

Jester and Fjord starting strong with the dirty/natural 20's! Also "I'd rather you wear it" "Fjord, it's so expensive!" They are so cute. Ayy Sprinkle/Artagan both got fed the Heroes' Feast! The excitement over the ring finally working lol. "Imma cast it at 4th level" lol Jester really tried her best to remove his slow and it worked!

9. Obligatory wish for Essek’s fancy dunamancy or magical items (Bonus: STILL hoping to see more high-damage AOE offensive spells that Essek has never cast because of the party placement, dark star anybody?).

The trapped haste spell MmmMm. GRAVITY FISSURE YAY hot spell flavour is hot. THANK YOU for that dispel magic on Yasha Essek you are the best. Nice magic missile but he is out in the open oh nO he is charmed oh no is he going to dark star the party?? Wheww thank you Caleb for the dispel, at fifth level too! He was so going to dark star Lucien if Cad was not pulled.

10. Obligatory wish for Caleb’s polymorph spell on himself or a party member. Actually, let’s expand to any party member’s polymorph! Give me those sweet polymorph interactions.

NVM we are doing the boss fight right now

11. The party tries to reach Lucien by mentioning Molly and Lucien actually having a physical reaction to their words.

Wow that was a physical reaction alright, definitely to Jester and Caleb's mention of Molly's name. Jester's song also had an effect. Everybody is trying yay! Well, it was worth a try. BEAU'S bonus action Gustuv talk made him lose a legendary action WOW. Fjord's, Caleb's attempt also succeeded. In round 2, Beau removed 1 legendary action, followed by Jester

12. Obligatory wish for Essek’s room in the tower (it will stay until it happens).

NVM we are doing the boss fight right now

13. Obligatory wish for Cad being a MVP in and out of combat because he always is.

CAD what a good pep talk I love you. Path to the grave and also the reaction war caster blight, very nice.

14. I NEED MORE RP PLEASE like last week’s high intensity combat was fun but I miss one-on-one conversations give them to me thank you. Longer conversations are even better.

NVM we are doing the boss fight right now, however there was a lot of Molly RP involved.

15. Everybody being super freaked out/creeped out by the terrible flesh city thanks to Matt’s wonderfully detailed and awesome descriptions.

The damaged state of the city, how it leans towards Lucien's cocoon thing and Lucien's transformation... OH NO the stalks not the tentacle stalks.

16.  At least one of the party members get mind-influenced/charmed by some effect during the combat (well at least Caleb’s got mind blank and Veth got intellect fortress, but I would be surprised if there was no mind shenanigans).

Well, I knew it would happen. Gaudius, the eye of longing/love that did not affect Beau DID charm Yasha with a failed wis save and Yasha attacked Beau, again. However thanks to Essek it didn't last long!

17. Somebody check in a bit on Essek’s mental state because he is clearly not entirely desensitized as seen from last episode. At least he got a full rest so physically he is fine (just squishy, like wizards are).

Hey Essek got to open up a little bit before their final fight, so that was great.

18. Caleb uses more fire or his customized spells or just any cool spells in general I guess because what’s sexier than wizards NOTHING I’m still hyped from last week.

Gravity fissure already?? Sweet max damage, despite the save! Caleb you can literally just copy any spell you see cast can't you, high int wizard I love you. Also the use of that potion and the scroll were pretty smart too.

19. We learn more about Lucien’s motives and what he is actually trying to do, or more about the Somnovem’s different? motives because I was very confused last episode. Lucien wants to “parent” the Somnovem by bombing them with 10 intuit charges, like okay are you sure you are not trying to kill them? Then again, if that doesn’t severely damage the Somnovem I don’t know what will.

Well we now know that Lucien has all the Somnovem power inside himself now and is still very much wanting to bring back the city - at least he can't right now because of the threshold crest they got rid of last session. This clarifies a lot. I guess the "parenting" was to weaken the Somnovem for him to absorb them all into himself?

20. Obligatory wish for everyone to remain relatively happy and alive by the end of the episode except Lucien, and the episode ends on a terrifying cliffhanger as always.

I mean, should have known that Lucien cannot be killed in 1 session. Otherwise though, what an episode! What a session! Absolutely amazing.

Bonus:

ESSEK IS MAKING A JOKE LMAO I can't with this man, he is also giving everybody spells/gifts, cute - I guess wizards all have the save love language.

CALEB IS ABOVE 100 HP thank you Jester for that 17 roll from Heroes' Feast! I knew you'd do it. The feast was so crucial in their combat too, what a queen. Caleb always be covering his friends in his anti-aberration cone, and burning Lucien's legendary reactions. Great moves.

Veth are you... horny for Lucien??? LMAO

OH NO Gaudius on Essek this is the alternative Essek bossfight timeline OH NO but at the same time YES the angst- oh nvm Caleb thanks lol.

Extra - combat notes for my record:

Saves minus # eyes

Elatis - Excitement, pulling the target 120 ft towards Lucien + eye.

Ira - Rage, fireball effect AOE damage.

Fastidan - Disgust (wilting dull green) necrotic damage

Luctus - Grief (Dex save), slow spell effect.

Timorei - fear effect, but negated by Heroes' feast immunity.

Culpasi - guilt (Con save) disadvantage on saving throws +...

Miramus - (wis save)

Vigilan - the eye that moves/emanates the anti-magic cone

Gaudius - (wis save) charm effect

WHAT A FIGHT! I can't wait for part 2 and hopefully that's Lucien's final form. I did not think that the Molly influence will have such a profound effect, but I sure am glad it did! Everyone was so amazing in this combat, I love it all.

[cheeriecherry]

Space Between [Aizawa Shouta x F!Reader x Yamada Hizashi] [3/9]

EraserMic x Reader

Part 2/9 (Planning has added another part)

Warnings: panic attacks, reader being a little awkward

A week passes in the blink of an eye. You’ve tried to keep busy while your friends are away at work, but you can only clean the house so many times before it becomes monotonous. 

You’ve also checked out a few apartments that are renting, but every single one you’ve visited so far has left you disappointed: too small, in the wrong neighborhood, no yard, wrong vibe. A little piece of you knows you’re making excuses to stay with Shouta and Hizashi longer, but you can’t help that you want your new place to fit your needs perfectly.

In the same breath, you’ve also done what you promised you would, and looked into a few of the resources Shouta provided you with, for counseling and therapy services. You thought it would be easy enough, check out the websites, set up an appointment, etcetera etcetera, but the moment you open one of the tabs your throat closes up.

You’ve been trying for three days to look through everything, trying to push through your discomfort and underlying panic, but so far the only thing it’s done is make you tired and cranky and stressed.

You close the laptop for the fourth day in a row, having spent the last half hour reading through yet another counseling site. Maybe it’s your anxiety, maybe it’s your fear of admitting you’re struggling, maybe it’s because you know you’ll have to talk about things you really don’t want to talk about...but none of these places feel like the right fit. Just like the apartments.

You glance at the clock on the wall, sighing deeply when you find that it’s barely past noon. 

Maybe you should get out, go for a walk or something? You don’t have very many clothes, so maybe you could go to the mall. Shop around a bit, get something to eat. Treat yourself.

It’s a good idea, you decide, and you need the fresh air.

----

When you walk into the mall, you instantly wish you’d stayed home.

It’s busy, and uncomfortably so. Elderly folks meeting up, parents pushing strollers with small children, a couple of highschool kids ditching class.

Surely no one would pay you any mind if you just turned around and walked right back out?

No, you think, taking a deep breath, I can do this. It’s just people.

You try to walk normally, and look like you’re not wincing at every step you take further into the crowd. It’s just people.

...People I can’t protect.

The thought pops into your mind faster than you can catch it, and your gait stutters. You push it away and keep walking, but it’s as if the psychological floodgates have been opened.

A villain could attack right now, and I wouldn’t do anything.

Your chest tightens.

I’m a useless excuse for a hero.

Your hands start shaking.

I would just stand there and watch them die. Just like-

You squeeze your eyes shut, and beeline to the nearest bench, sitting down to try and take a few calming breaths. 

It starts to work, and you can feel your body relaxing slightly, until an elderly woman decides to take up the seat next to you. Your skin buzzes with electricity, hyper-aware of her presence beside you. When you glance over at her, you find that she’s smiling kindly at you.

“Are you alright, dear?” she asks, reaching out to rest a dainty hand on your knee. 

You resist the guttural urge to snap away from her. She’s just checking on you, you tell yourself, don’t be rude.

“I’m- yes. I’m okay,” you say with a shaky voice, “Thank you.” You can tell she doesn’t quite believe it, and you don’t blame her. You probably look a mess, a trembling, blanched, wide-eyed mess.

You track her movement as she reaches into the purse tucked under her arm, expecting something, anything, any kind of threat to appear, but she only pulls out a small red lollipop. She offers it to you with a wrinkled hand, gently pressing it into your palm.

“A distraction, perhaps?” she suggests, “Sweets always make me feel better.”

You thank her quietly and unwrap the treat, sticking it in your cheek. You try to focus on the overwhelming flavour, the sickly sweet synthetic cherry, the way it burns against your tongue.

Another woman calls out to the lady beside you, who squeezes your knee softly. “I hope you feel better soon, dear,” she says, standing. “Have a lovely afternoon.”

You smile and nod at her, and the moment she’s out of sight you spit the candy out and bolt towards the exit.

----

You finally stop running about a block away from the mall, heart beating erratically and chest so tight you can barely breathe. You find a nearby empty bench and fall onto it, and let your head hang low. Your eyes sting with unshed tears, and your vision is blurry, and it doesn’t help the threat of oncoming nausea.

Thankfully now that you’re out in the open, you begin to calm down again. You wipe at your eyes to rid yourself of your tears, and try to focus on the feeling of the bench pressing into your legs. Warm from the sun against your skin, sturdy and unwavering metal slats holding you steady, slight tremor when someone sits down next to you…

Not again, you think, shrinking away from the person.

“Rough day?” they ask. You eye them cautiously, taking note of every detail.

You can’t tell if they’re a boy or a girl, not that it really matters to you. They’re young, maybe sixteen, clad in dark baggy clothes. Their posture is casual, comfortable, hands shoved in pockets, and they don’t look old enough to have graduated school. You wonder if they’re skipping class, but you don’t really care.

“Yeah,” you mumble, “Something like that.”

The kid turns towards you, slinging an arm over the back of the bench.

“That’s too bad,” they say, genuinity unsettling you, “Nice lady like you shouldn’t be lookin’ so sad.”

Your stomach roils with anxiety, and you’re sure your blood pressure has skyrocketed again. “I’m sorry,” you say quickly, standing, “I’m not really in the mood to talk. I’m...I’m gonna go-”

A slender hand shoots out and grabs your wrist, holding you in place.

“Wait, please! I’ve been looking for you for days-”

Pain shoots up your arm, and you glare down at the teen, fury overtaking your mind. “Let go of me before I rip your fucking arm off.”

“Please, let me explain-”

You rip your arm out of their grip, and take a few weak steps backwards. “If you’ve been looking for me, then you know who I am, and you know what I’ve done. Don’t think I’ll hesitate to break you into pieces if you come near me again.”

The kid stares at you with wide honey-brown eyes, an inkling of fear flashing behind them.

Good.

You waste no time turning around to run back home, leaving your assailant behind.

----

Ten o’clock finds Shouta and Hizashi walking through the front door, the latter talking animatedly about something you couldn’t quite hear. 

You stir the ladle around the pot a few times, judging the thickness of the stew you’re preparing, while you listen to them chatter back and forth. A sad smile graces your features, and you wonder if this is the way they usually come home; tired, but always happy to have each other.

“Something smells really good in here!”

You crane your head to the doorway right as Hizashi traipses in. He zeroes in on you in an instant, coming over to wrap you in a tight hug. It surprises you, even though it shouldn’t. In years past, he was always the most open with physical affection, often greeting you and Shouta with touches and hugs and kisses on the cheek.

“You guys are right on time,” you say, reaching across the stove to flip the burner off, “Dinner’s ready.”

Hizashi makes haste in preparing a bowl for himself, dashing out to the dining room to find a seat. You shake your head and fix some stew for yourself and Shouta, following in suit shortly after. The two of them are already set up around the table, making smalltalk with each other while they wait for you.

Shouta thanks you when you set his bowl down in front of him, but waits until you sit to start eating.

“So how were your days?” you ask, stirring your meal absently, “Did anything interesting happen?”

Hizashi shrugs, and doesn’t even bother to swallow before answering. “Not really. Between teaching and hosting a radio show, it actually gets pretty repetitive.”

You have a hard time believing that. Before you’d left, his stories about his students and his shows were endless and hilarious, and he’d talk about them for hours on end if you let him.

“What about patrol?”

“Eh, same same. Stopped a couple small timers, you know, convenience store robbery, purse theft, that kind of thing. Nothing big.”

You nod. “I’d consider that a win. Smaller villains means smaller paperwork…” 

The three of you break into an uneasy silence, tension so thick you could cut it with a knife. You eat your meal slowly, and avoid looking at either of them. Something was on their minds, and you had a feeling you knew what it was, but if you didn’t look at either of them then maybe they wouldn’t ask you…

Finally, Shouta sighs. “This is idiotic.”

“Sho,” Hizashi hisses, but doesn’t get much else out.

“There was something we needed to talk to you about, but you seem like you’ve had some kind of day. It might be easier to talk about it later.”

You think back to your eventful afternoon filled with panic attacks, and mask the worry with a smile. “It wasn’t too bad,” you assure them, “Besides, you’ve got me curious, now. Spit it out!”

Shouta sets his spoon down. “I was wondering if you’d consider being a guest speaker for the first year hero classes at Yuuei. They need to learn about all the possibilities of hero work, including undercover missions.”

“And I figured that since you’re here now,” Hizashi interrupts, “you’d be a perfect candidate!” 

You’re surprised, to say the least, and it’s obvious. 

“Take some time to think about it. You’ve got a couple weeks, still, so you don’t need to decide right away.”

You let out a breath you hadn’t realized you were holding. You’re grateful for the buffering period, because as much as you’d love to say yes to them, you’re not sure if you could handle speaking in front of a bunch of teens. Especially if your afternoon was any indication of your coping abilities.

What would you even talk about? Would you have to prepare a presentation? A speech? Or would they simply ask you questions? And god, how would you answer said questions? How could you tell a bunch of young hopefuls that undercover missions are almost always riddled with violence and PTSD?

You take another bite of stew. “I’ll...consider it.”

----

The rest of the dinner is more comfortable, filled with idle conversation and a couple of old jokes. It’s nothing compared to how the three of you used to be, and a little piece of you wonders if you’ve done something to upset the balance the two of them had created together.

Of course I have, you think, I showed up after disappearing for years and now I’m taking up their couch.

Still, there seems to be something more, some kind of tension beyond the stresses of recent events. Maybe it just felt different because you were different, more closed off to the world, to people, but it’s not like you could help it.

You couldn’t bear to lose either of them, if they were to find out what really happened on your mission. The things you saw, the things you did.

You could foot a little bit of awkwardness if it meant you would get to keep them in your life.

The three of you bid goodnight after you eat, each of you tired after a long day. You know for a fact that you won’t be able to sleep yet, not without nightmares, but you dim the lights anyways to keep your friends from questioning you.

You get comfortable on the couch and pull Shouta’s laptop over, flipping the screen open to continue your search about counseling services. You’ve gone through every suggestion on his list, save for one.

And so far, as you scroll through their website, it seems to be okay. The staff members and doctors seem to be knowledgeable, and the numerous patient reviews praise them for their compassion, kindness, reasonable prices, and short wait list.

You scroll around a little more, picking out whatever contact information is available. Most of it is done through email, it seems, which you’re fine with.

You open a new email document and start typing, asking what kind of information you need to provide and how the process works, and what steps you need to take in order to get a consultation appointment.

You don’t expect an answer until tomorrow, so you’re pleasantly surprised when a reply pops into your inbox not five minutes later.

‘Hello, Miss Y/N,’ it reads, ‘Thank you for contacting us. I’m Nurse Yumi, a member of the practising night staff. It’s a big step to seek help when you’re struggling, so we appreciate you reaching out to us. If you’d like, we can set up a consultation appointment for tomorrow afternoon. I’ve attached the preliminary forms to fill out before your visit, if you could please have them completed before then. If this is agreeable for you, let me know and I'll give you the time and date.

Well wishes,

Nurse Practitioner Yumi.’

You quickly type up another email, thanking them for their quick notification as well as confirming your availability. 

You set a reminder in your phone before you lay down so you don’t forget about it, and shut down the laptop, placing it back on the coffee table. You’re not quite ready to sleep yet, but you know if you stay up any later then it’ll be harder to wake up on time.

Begrudgingly, you curl up on your side and try to think about nothing as you doze off.

[snowdice]

Little Kestrel (Part 14)[Birds of Different Feathers Series]

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Relationships: Logan & Patton & Virgil (future Virgil/Patton but not in this story)

Characters:

Main: Logan, Patton, Virgil

Appear: Thomas

Mentioned: Janus

Summary:

It was supposed to be a quick job either way. Either Virgil would assassinate King Thomas of Prijaznia or he’d be caught and get executed. Yet, when Virgil gets the wrong bedroom and gets caught by Prince Logan and his future royal advisor, Patton, the job ends up getting way more complicated for the 14-year-old. He also ends up sleeping in a (actually pretty comfortable) closet for a few weeks…

Notes: Implied/referenced child abuse, assassination attempt, knives, torture mentioned, captivity, teenagers being really dumb

This is a prequel to Kill Dear. I wrote it 100 words at a time on my blog, but this is the edited version. If you want to see how it was crafted, look at the tag proofread stories.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13

“So then,” Patton was saying. “We ran to the stables.”

“We went to gazebo first,” Logan cut in.

“Right, we tried to go to the gazebo first,” Patton corrected, “but Mr. Deknis was over there tending to the tomatoes, and we knew he’d tell Mama the second he saw us. So, then we turned around and went to the stables.”

Virgil tilted his head, listening to the story Patton was telling. Patton was not the best storyteller. He tended to get lost in the middle and embellish, though Logan always corrected him. It was still very entertaining to watch though because he got incredibly animated. He’d even toppled himself over in excitement a couple of times.

Virgil squeezed the small pillow he had in his lap. He… wasn’t 100% sure what was going on. Logan and Patton had settled him on the blanket covered ground near Logan’s bed and proceeded to feed him snacks and talk about a lot of different things. It had started with them talking about what they’d done that day, and when Patton had made reference to something Virgil hadn’t understood, the two of them ended up talking about things from their childhood.

Virgil found himself entranced by their stories about playing in and running around the castle. It was all so different from what Virgil had experienced.

“…but, right as we were about to get to the ladder to climb up into the hay loft, Logan tripped!” Patton said, arms whipping around him. “He fell into a container of grain for the horses and it spilled all over the place. He tried to get up but grabbed the edge of the water trough and apparently it wasn’t very secure because it fell over and soaked him. So, then he was wet and covered in grain. He looked hilarious.”

“I did not!” Logan protested, but it did not sound like all of the other times he’d corrected Patton’s stories that night.

Patton looked over at him. “You did! You woke up the cute stable hand and he laughed himself silly at you, and by the time we got you even partially cleaned up, your dad had already found us. That’s how we got caught.”

“I have no recollection of these events,” Logan clearly lied, his cheeks a bit flushed.

“Liar,” Patton claimed. “You complained about picking grain out of your sheets for weeks.”

“No,” Logan growled.

“Yes! It’s okay. It was a good laugh.”

Logan’s eyes narrowed on him, and he looked pissed, but a second later, his expression lightened up. “You know what else was a ‘good laugh’?” he asked.

There was a second of silence before…

“Don’t you dare Logan.”

Logan looked Patton directly in the eye. “Patton was thirteen,” Logan started, but was interrupted the next moment when Patton lobbed a pillow at his head. Logan grabbed the pillow and leaned forward to smack Patton back with it. “He was thirteen and had just ‘discovered boys’ as his mother and my father called it when they attempted to explain his behavior to me. The focus of said ‘discovering’ at the time was the son of an ambassador from Lamir” who was staying for the summer, a seventeen-year-old boy by the name Bernardo.”

Virgil flinched back as Patton suddenly threw himself across the semicircle they’d made with their bodies to tackle Logan to the ground. He watched as they ineffectually wrestled on the ground for a few seconds before Logan, voice strained, continued to speak, while battling Patton’s hands away from his mouth.

“Patton’s only knowledge about flirting… ow… at that point was laughing at everything someone said and touching their arms and shoulders.” Logan managed to flip himself onto his stomach which was a horrible move as far as Virgil was concerned. It put him at a disadvantage to get out of the pin. However, Patton just kept reaching for his mouth and didn’t bare down on his neck to try to cut off his oxygen like Virgil expected. So, perhaps it was a rational move. “Our parents were speaking leaving Patton, Bernardo, and I in the garden,” Logan mumbled into the ground. “Bernardo said something ‘funny’ and Patton went to slap his shoulder while laughing but shoved too hard… Patton did you just lick my face?!”

“And I’ll do it again if you don’t shut up!” Patton threatened. That was a… weird fighting strategy.

Logan paused to consider his options. “He shoved Bernardo into the fountain and when Bernardo asked him why he did that, he ran away and wouldn’t talk to him the rest of the summer!” Logan rushed out.

Patton reached over and grabbed the nearest pillow, proceeding to whack him viciously in the back of the head. Logan was lucky the nearest object was a pillow and not something any sturdier. “It’s not funny!” Patton yelled, smacking him even more, which was when Virgil realized Logan was laughing despite the pinning and pillow pummeling. “It’s not!” Patton said. “I really liked him!!”

“He was seventeen!” Logan said. “It was never going to happen!”

Patton groaned and rolled off of Logan to lay on his back and stare at the ceiling. “But he had so many muscles,” Patton said. “He probably could have thrown me 10 yards.”

“And that is… a benefit?” Logan asked, rolling over onto his side to face him.

“You don’t. Get me.” Patton tilted his head to look at Virgil. “Anyway,” he said. “That is the story of how I died at 13.”

Virgil stared at him, and Patton’s forehead crinkled looking at him.

“Is something wrong, honey?” he asked.

 “What was that?” Virgil asked.

“What was what?”

Virgil just blinked at him. Patton seemed to think for a moment.

“Oh, did you think we were fighting?” Patton asked. “Like, really fighting?”

“You weren’t fighting?” Virgil asked.

“No, sweetie,” Patton said. “We were just playing.” He popped up into a sitting position. “Well, play fighting, but emphasis on play!”

Virgil looked over at Logan for confirmation. “No one is harmed nor was there any intention to harm each other,” he assured.

Patton grabbed the pillow he’d been smacking Logan with. “Like this!” he said. “Bap.” Unlike how he’d smacked Logan ruthlessly, he basically just touched Virgil’s shoulder with it.

Virgil squinted at him.

“Bap!” Patton said again, smacking him once more, this time with a little bit more force and on the cheek. Virgil’s nose scrunched up. “Pillow fight!”

“Pillow fight?”

“You try,” he said, pointing to the pillow in Virgil’s lap.

Virgil glanced down at the bands around his wrist. “Um…” he said. “I don’t think I can?”

“Oh, right,” Patton said with a frown. He bit his lip and glanced over at Logan. “Maybe…”

“Ill-advised,” Logan said.

“But…” Patton said. “Pillow fight.”

“We would have to be very cautious and make sure there were no weapons in the area.”

“No weapons but pillows!”

“Fine,” Logan relented to whatever was going on. “Let’s clear the area.” Virgil watched them with mounting confusion as they removed everything within a few meters radius of him except for pillows and blankets.

“There!” Patton said after a minute. “All done!”

“What are you doing?” Virgil said.

“We’re going to have a pillow fight,” Patton said.

“But I…”

“We’ll temporarily allow your restraints to be in the third setting like when you’re in the closet.”

Were they serious? Were they stupid? Virgil could have killed them dozens of times with the second setting and now they were giving him even more range of motion?

“You have to promise not to try to hurt anyone though,” Patton said. Virgil stared at him dumbly, as Patton held out his pinky finger. “Pinky promise.”

“Pinky promise?”

Patton nodded solemnly. “We lock pinky fingers and make a promise. It’s the most binding promise in the universe.”

Virgil looked at his finger, confused. He’d never heard of that type of deal. “What kind of magic is it?”

“No magic,” Patton said. “Just friendship.” Virgil tilted his head but brought his hand up so Patton could twine their fingers together. “Now, promise you won’t hurt anyone.”

“I promise I won’t hurt anyone,” he said.

“It’s a deal!” said Patton, squeezing Virgil’s finger with his own briefly before drawing away. “I trust you.” Virgil felt a rush of something that was no type of magic he’d ever come into contact before but was definitely far more powerful.

Logan came over to them and waved his hand over the restraints on Virgil. They buzzed slightly and Virgil looked between them. “So, I just hit you with pillows?”

“Try not to hit too hard near the face, and Lo and I should probably take off our glasses before we start, but yeah,” Patton said, taking his glasses off as he said it. It was yet another foolish move on his part. “It’s fun, and it doesn’t hurt.”

“Okay…” Virgil said.

“I will demonstrate,” Logan said as he took a pillow and smacked Patton in the stomach.

“Hey! No fair!” Patton giggled. “We haven’t started yet!” This did not deter Logan however, as he continued to smack Patton with a pillow.

“On the contrary,” he said. “It has started, and we’re getting you first.”

“No,” Patton whined, but the way he crumpled to the ground under the onslaught seemed far too staged to make Virgil worry. He didn’t even try to curl up into a ball or protect his head, just taking the hits and giggling.

Logan looked up at Virgil and motioned with his head. Virgil inched over and looked down at Patton. Logan slowed for a few moments. “Go on,” he urged.

Virgil bit his lip and reached forward to smack Patton lightly with his pillow which seemed to do nothing to him but renew his peels of giggles. From there, it was easy to continue. Logan picked up the pace of his strikes and he and Virgil proceeded to ‘fight’ Patton until he couldn’t breathe through his laughter and pushed the pillows away, curling up on his side to recover. Virgil took the cue from Logan to cease their attack.

“Now what?” Virgil asked when Patton sat up.

“Now I get vengeance!” Patton said, popping to his feet and smacking Logan in the face. “Help me Virgil!” So, Virgil turned on Logan and he and Patton gave the prince the same treatment. Then, because it was only fair, it was Virgil’s turn, though they were a lot more careful with him then they’d been with each other, and really Patton spent more of the time checking in on Virgil then actually hitting him with the pillow. It was nice. Fun. And when Virgil pushed them away, they pulled back.

Then, it was Patton’s turn again and they went around teaming up on each other and sometimes just smacking at each other at random.

Eventually, they slowed, and all ended up laying near each other on the floor.

“Well, that made me hungry,” Patton said, sitting up and stretching. “I asked Mama to make us a bunch of mini sandwiches. I’ll go get them.”

He hopped to his feet to walk over to where they’d stored the food earlier in those little glowing magical balls Logan had for food preservation.

Logan and Virgil sat up too, and Virgil offered him his wrists.

“Right,” Logan said with a blink. He made a motion and Virgil could feel the magic weighing down his hands once again. He’d almost forgotten, Virgil thought with an internal sigh. They’d given an assassin free range of motion, had a pillow fight with him, and almost forgotten to restrain him again. What was Virgil going to do with these idiots?

Want to read more? Click below!

AO3 Part 15

[the-wotog-collection]

some new(ish) kids

“new” as in they didn’t exist yet when we last posted. so some of them are at least 9 months old. anyway!

list under the cut:

CAS

- they’re a half-elf monk! but now that i think about it it would be kinda funny if they had a level or two in rogue

- honestly? they’re a frat boy, but one who drinks respect women (and everyone, really) juice

- complete thembo. they have a -1 int, but +5 dex and +3 cha so who’s really winning here

- seriously when i say they’re a thembo i mean it. cas can dodge bullets all day but they don’t know that a tomato is a fruit

- they’re a people person and respectful and are very much work hard play hard. i love them

PUMPKIN

- now this is a bastard right here

- he/they tiefling rogue. yes they stole that crown what about it

- very much like mollymauk tealeaf i’m not gonna lie. they’ll charm the pants off of you and run away with your whole coin pouch

- smth i love about pumpkin is 1) their last name is pye 2) they have aliases bc in nearly every town they’ve been in there’s a warrant out for his arrest

- pumpkin pye (persona), a flirty rapscallion. if they had to pick one alias to stay as, this would be that one

- apple pye, a quiet sweetheart. kinda country bumpkin-esque

- pecan pye, taciturn but honest (as he can be while using an alias and on the run from the law and generally up to no good) and a hard worker

 - underneath all the layers? he’s kinda sad and lonely, still a flirt and a rapscallion but considerably less, and sometimes he just wants to stay in bed instead of going out and getting into all kinds of trouble

- oh also! he’s self conscious about his freckles, and usually uses some kind of makeup to cover them up if hell brain is acting up/he’s causing trouble

TENJIN

- i’ll be honest i do not remember if i still have their picrew

- i do nvm

- this is tenjin! iirc they’re a drow enchanter (homebrew class my cousin made) but ig in a legal game they’d be a divination wizard

- he’s such a sweetie, oml

- fun fact he has autism! mostly nonverbal and gets overwhelmed super easily, and has a whole pouch full of trinkets that they fidget and stim with

- baby. baby boy

- really fun to play actually

BEE

- she’s here to kick names and take ass, and she’s all out of names

- a whole lesbian. most of why she does what she does is to protect pretty girls

- human (shocker, i know) cleric of a storm god that i forgot to write down

- anyway!

- do no harm but take no shit is her motto. her methods may be borderline illegal, but hey, as long as the thing gets done it’s fine

- usually.

- basically her only method is swing a bat around until people talk and if the bat hits anything/anyone, well. that’s not her business

- oh yeah her bat. it’s infused with electricity and deals lightning damage as well as bludgeoning. it’s sick as hell

- she’s pretty rad

RAY

- everyone needs a weed druid

- okay but seriously. they eat every plant they come across to 1) figure out what they do (they have insanely high con dw) and 2) for magical power

- are they high most of the time? yes. are they really sad actually? also yes

- they aren’t religious, but they do worship the deity their childhood best friend (turned lover, yes) worshipped

- i might talk about that more later :)

- anyway they’re super chill and also one of the few drows i have, iirc

WALKER

- okay now we’re starting to catch up

- his name isn’t actually walker, but it’s what everyone calls him so that’s what he goes by

- he/they (wow theres a lot of he/theys huh) fallen aasimar gloom stalker ranger

- basically think of the edgiest anime boy you can imagine and go “what if he went to therapy”

- he’s such a good boy! yes they still do the adventuring thing, but make a point of going to therapy every week

- they’re making some great progress :)

- while he’s basically a witcher and gets treated like one (i.e. poorly), he just wants to settle down somewhere quiet when there’s no more evil in the world to grow vegetables where the only one around to judge him for being mute is his crow

- the picrew didn’t have a crow so please pretend that’s what the pigeon is

VAL

- valor is a tiefling fighter who came into existence bc i rewatched netflix castlevania and was super gay for striga so i made a character inspired by her

- also has autism, but in addition, she has ptsd from her days in the royal army. she’s seen some shit yall

- isn’t very good with social interactions, a lot of stuff goes right over her head and she’s just awkward as hell, but get her talking about her special interest (military tactics) and she will talk for hours. please let her

- fun fact she met her wife bc she was fishing in a bog trying to catch dinner and fished out a wholeass lady instead

- she’s buff as hell. she could use literally anything as a weapon and make it hurt

UNNAMED WIZARD

- i don’t have a name for them yet BUT i do know that they’re a bitch

- yet another he/they, this time we have a neutral evil wizard who doesn’t care who gets hurt as long as they get results for their experiments

- think albedo genshinimpact but with almost no morals

- yes he’d cast ninth level spells on his party if he was researching something. no he would not feel remorse. probably

- idk i haven’t fleshed him out yet i just know that he’s a bitch

MOUSE

- finally! my favorite character on this list

- this is maisy, but she’s so tiny that everyone calls her mouse

- when i say tiny i mean she’s a halfling and also seven years old. she’s fucking little

- little human druid girl who basically raised herself in the forest and can & will make friends with literally any animal she comes across

- her arcane focus is her flower crown, which also has berries growing on it. they grow back every time she picks one to give to her friends :)

- she’s so fucking pure oh my god. actual cinnamon roll and everything that’s good in this world

- her rat’s name is rat. he’s her friend :)

- and also dog sized compared to her it’s hilarious. she has a little leash for him made of vines and particularly spry twigs

- have some bonus art bc oh my god cutie

[motherjoel]

Leading Lady (Spencer Reid x Reader)

chapter six- whispers of are you sure

wc: 2.1k

summary: you and spencie get closer owo

a/n: im sorry i haven’t posted a chapter in awhile :/

chapter index: chap 1, chap 2, chap 3, chap 4, chap 5

-

You started to stir from your nap when you heard hushed voices a few desks down. Remaining quiet, you kept your head down to listen in on the conversation.

“Listen man, it sounds like you’re crushin hard on this girl,” you recognized Morgan's voice. Reid spoke next in hushed tones.

“It doesn’t matter how I feel about her, it's just unprofessional. And besides, she would probably go for a guy like you anyway,” said Spencer.

You could feel your heart break. It didn’t take a genius to know that they were talking about you, but it saddened you to hear about Spencer’s lack of confidence. In your eyes, he was the ideal man. You wanted to show that to him one day. 

“Now you listen to me. You gotta stop getting in the way of your own happiness. Any girl would be lucky to have you, you just have to see it for yourself,” Morgan told him, warming your heart. This team was like a family, and you had to admit, you were a little jealous about their love for each other, but it was good to know that Spencer had such a great support system. You felt kind of weird listening in, however, so you decided to “wake up.” Slowly lifting your head, you yawned and stretched before looking over at the two men with a sleepy smile, pretending to just realize that they were there.

“Hey sleepy head,” said Morgan before getting up and turning to Spencer. “I gotta help Hotch with something,” he told him, leaning in to say the next part more quietly. “Remember what I told you,” he said before clapping Spencer on his shoulder and ruffling your hair when he walked past you. You smiled at the exchange and turned back to see Spencer nervously picking at his fingernails. 

“So, what'd I miss? You catch the guy yet?” you asked in an attempt to lighten the mood. Spencer just chuckled nervously and shook his head.

“No, not yet,” he paused, thinking of what to say next. “I’m glad you got some sleep in. Studies show that most healthy adults need to get between 7 and 9 hours of sleep each night to function at their best,” he told you, continuing to nervously ramble, citing multiple facts about sleep. You just smiled at him, not fully processing his words. You were just mesmerized by his intelligence and passion for mundane facts. He noticed you staring. “What?” he asked nervously.

“Oh I'm sorry,” you said, flustered. “It's just… you're cute when you ramble,” you blushed and looked down. Spencer had the same reaction.

“Oh. Most people think it's annoying, the team normally cuts me off,” he said, avoiding eye contact. You could almost see the gears turning in his head, almost as if he regretted saying that for fear of judgement. 

“If anything, it's... endearing,” you said, lifting your head back up to meet his gaze. He looked surprised that someone enjoyed his quirks. To you, this is what made him genuine and irresistible, irreplaceable. The two of you stared intensely for a moment before you started to speak at the same time.

“I thin-” you started.

“Do you-” he began.

You both laughed in response to this, the silence continuing for a moment longer.

“Y/N,” he started, with a shakiness in his voice, “I know we’ve only known each other for a few days, but I really care about you. Every time I have a breakthrough on this case, the first person I think of is you,” he started. You got up from your desk to walk closer to him as he went on. “And I don’t know what to call that, but you’re just really pretty and you’re so nice to me and you always are interested in what I have to say and you smell really goo-” you cut him off by softly grabbing the sides of his face. 

“I have never met anyone like you before,” you told him in awe, stars in your eyes. He mimicked your expression, his surprise melting into adoration. Your eyes flicker down to his lips and he wordlessly nods, accepting what you had so badly wanted to do from the minute you met him. Slowly, you leaned in until you were an inch away from his face.

“Are you sure?” you whispered, wanting to confirm your mutual feelings. You weren't imagining this, right? Spencer didn't wait a second to wordlessly accept. With a small but nervous laugh, he closed the distance between his chapped lips and yours, resting his hands on your waist and pulling you closer. It was as if you were in a movie, the magical spark between you two. Your kisses with Logan hadn’t been like this- they didn’t hold this emotion, this longing. Logan's kisses were chores, not luxuries. A few seconds, what could have been hours, had passed before you pulled away and rested your forehead on his, eyes still closed. You wanted to savor this moment of peace, this calm before the inevitable storm. You both jump to the sound of an attention grabbing cough. Turning around you see a sly Prentiss, feigning gravitas.

“Uh, Hotch wants to see you. We’re going over possible unsubs and he thinks it would be good for you guys to be there. But, by all means, finish what you were doing first,” she said with a wink before speed walking into the conference room where the rest of the team was.

“So…” you trailed off.

“Yeah, so…” he replied looking at you with his blush still lingering.

“We should probably go see what's up,” you told him, although you didn’t want your time with him to end.

“Good idea,” he replied, and the two of you began your walk into the conference room, his hand resting on the small of your back as he led you. Once you got inside and settled in a seat next to JJ and Spence, you looked around to see the entire room staring at you with odd smiles. Rossi even shoots you a wink. Huh, word really does get around fast. You didn’t mind them knowing, however- you knew you had their support if Spence was happy. And that's all you could ask for.

“So about those unsubs!” Spencer starts, trying to diffuse the childish energy in the room. 

“Right,” Hotch begins, trying to hide his own sly smirk. “We found out that the time of death of the latest suspect was at around 5:30, just like you thought,” said Hotch in a more serious tone.

“That would give Nichols the perfect amount of time to make the kill and then show up late to rehearsal,” replied Rossi. You were shocked.

“Wait, Nichols? As in Matt Nichols, my Matt Nichols?” you asked, frantically. Reid flinched at your intensity and the use of “my” when referring to Matt, but you didn’t care. Matt might get on your nerves sometimes but you wouldn’t let him take the fall for something like this. You couldn’t have one of your leads getting arrested the week before the show, either. “A guy shows up late to one rehearsal and you assume he's a serial killer? Man, he can’t catch a break,” you huffed with a mirthless smile. 

“Y/N, you have to admit, he fits the profile perfectly,” offered JJ, you just shook your head.

“I see the way he looks at you,” said Spencer, softly. As he continues he attempts to speak with more conviction but to you it sounded like he was trying to prove some far fetched conspiracy. “And that guy is possessive. When we kissed at your rehearsal the guy looked like he wanted to kill me!’ he said, trying to convince you. The mention of the kiss earned a whistle from Garcia on her screen. 

“Not the time, Garcia,” Spencer snapped. You were in shock. The nerve he possessed to be giving an attitude right now surprised you. You could tell he was just on edge because he cared about you, but you didn’t want him snapping on his teammates because of you. 

“I’m sorry you guys, but just because Matt and I used to have a ‘thing,’ doesn’t mean he wants me dead,” you said, standing up and walking out of the room. Your head was spinning and you needed some fresh air. 

You grabbed Spencer’s sweater from where you left it on the chair and tugged it on before making your way outside. Once you were finally in the cold air you felt like you could breathe. How could this happen? Only a few short days ago you were at the top of your game, starring in your dream role and working towards a promotion at work, granted, the amount of times you had to call out for FBI business might affect that. The BAU threw a wrench in your whole life, but for some reason, you couldn’t be mad at them for it. JJ was like the sister you never had- the two of you were immediately connected and you didn’t want to lose her. Garcia was the hilarious and beautiful best friend you had always needed in your life, always ready to lighten the mood. Hotch, stern as he could be, was a compassionate leader and you were so glad the team had him. Morgan was protective and so sweet- even just knowing you for a short period of time, he had nothing to offer but kindness. Prentiss was smart as a whip and loved to tease you and Spence, but you wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. Through your savored but limited interactions with Rossi, you could tell he was a father figure for the team. This was a bit of a sore spot with you, but you hoped you could get closer with him over time. And Spencer. He was so frustratingly great. Great at his job, great at making you feel safe, great at… well… everything. You felt so lucky to know all these people and bond with them, you almost forgot your frustrations with them. But, after all, they were the professionals. If it came down to it, you would try to vouch for Matt but if they suspected him, you would trust their instincts.

You removed yourself from your thoughts and were about to make your way back inside when you heard quick footsteps from behind you and a sharp pain on the back of your skull before it all went black.

-

Inside the station, the team continued their conversation about the case. Spencer, however, was pacing around the conference room worried that he just screwed up what you two had going. Rossi excused himself from the team and walked over to Spence to put a calming hand on his shoulder.

“Go. Make sure she’s okay, we can handle this,” he told him, and that’s all it took for Spencer to bolt out of the room and out of the station. Looking around, his heart dropped when he didn’t see you. He tried calling your name a few times but he was received without a response. That's when the panic began to set in. He sprinted back inside the station and ran to the team, face red and panting.

“She’s gone.”

-

You woke up in an empty room, seated in a chair with your arms strapped behind you while your legs were tied together. Looking up you could see a tripod with a camera, filming your every move. Things began to make sense- the unsub had finally tracked your whereabouts and had taken you hostage. You couldn’t help but let out a dry laugh at the circumstances. You had thrown away your life just because you were upset about an assumption a trained team of professionals made. You had thrown away the life that you had worked so hard to want. Your father's passing had left you in a terrible place where your mind wandered to the unthinkable. These thoughts were something you had struggled with your whole life. You never planned on actually taking your life, but some mornings you were disappointed to wake up. It wasn’t until recently that you regained the will to take advantage of what life had to offer. Your passion for theatre was reignited and you met an amazing group of people- a group that you weren’t ready to say goodbye to yet. You were shaken from your thoughts when you noticed a shadowy figure enter the room from the door opposite of you- this figure was familiar, one you recognized. 

“Matt?”

-

taglist: @mcntsee, @diesinspanishbcimhispanic, @chickens-are-life, @rexorangecouny, @ceeellewrites, @aerialdinosaur, @just-damn-bored

[wondereads]

Personal Recommendation (2/14/20)

The Sisters Grimm by Michael Buckley

I’m doing something new this week! I’ll be reviewing every book in The Sisters Grimm series. Each will get a small paragraph and get a rating out of ten, and then I’ll rate the series overall. Hope you guys enjoy it! Please keep in mind this will contain spoilers for the later books, so don’t read ahead if you don’t want some major spoilers!

#1: The Fairy-Tale Detectives     9/10

The very beginning! Sabrina and Daphne Grimm, after a year in foster care with some dubious caretakers, are being sent to live with their grandmother, who, until a few days ago, they didn’t know existed. Granny Relda lives in Ferryport Landing, a typical small town in almost all aspects except for the significant population of fairytale characters or Everafters. The first book serves as a good introduction to Buckley’s world. The sisters have been shielded from fairytales their entire lives, so it’s easy to insert explanations for the inexperienced reader. It also very quickly sets up Sabrina and Daphne’s characters by using their reaction to Granny Relda and her fairytale reveal. Daphne, being a younger, more sheltered child, accepts it wholeheartedly and is excited to get involved in solving magical mysteries. Sabrina, after protecting her sister from nutcases for a year, has a much more cynical outlook, and it takes an actual giant scooping Relda up for her to believe. There’s also some memorable introductions for other important characters such as Mr. Canis, Puck, Mirror, and Mayor Charming. In terms of the plot, Buckley consistently creates mysteries that have twists but aren’t too difficult to follow for late elementary students.

#2: The Unusual Suspects     7/10

Things are starting to get a little more intense. Sabrina and Daphne are required to go to school after being preoccupied with chasing giants around the countryside. Unfortunately, especially for Sabrina, who wants to regain some semblance of normalcy, something is killing the teachers at school. I forgot how gruesome the murders were. I also forgot that Sabrina is in sixth grade. This particular book always got on my nerves. Sabrina is clearly having some issues; her parents are missing, she’s trapped in a town with fairytale characters, she can’t see to escape humiliation either at the hands of Puck or her classmates, and now people are being killed left and right. And yet, her family refuses to see that she needs help and decides to reprimand her constantly instead. The villain for this book is particularly disturbing. I must warn readers-child manipulation and abuse is a common theme in these books. If you couldn’t already catch on in the first book, it becomes obvious here that Sabrina has some grudges against the magical community.

#3: The Problem Child     7/10

This book has a sort of in-between feeling to me. Sabrina comes upon a maniacal little girl dressed in red who is holding her currently enchanted parents captive. The little girl, obsessed with recreating her family, is convinced they are her own parents and controls a jabberwocky, her ‘kitty’. All she needs is a granny and a doggy-Granny Relda and Mr. Canis. Everything in this book pours into the next ones, while, unlike the other books, there isn’t much of a self-contained plot. Red comes more into play in Tales from the Hood and The Everafter War, the election sets up Magic and Other Misdemeanors, and the vorpal blade and Puck’s injury lead into Once Upon a Crime. This book, however, introduces Uncle Jake, one of the most interesting characters in terms of development, and it also begins the problem of Sabrina’s magic addiction. The events of this book contribute to Sabrina’s distrust of magic after she has some run-ins with her addiction. It is also when you maybe start to develop some affection for Charming, despite his over-inflated ego.

#4: Once Upon a Crime     10/10

This one is my personal favorite. After Puck’s run-in with the jabberwocky, the Grimms take an emergency trip to New York, Sabrina and Daphne’s old home. There they plead the king of Faerie, Oberon, to heal Puck. Unfortunately, Oberon is poisoned within hours of their arrival, and Relda, of course, takes the case. This book is so much fun because in Ferryport Landing they just sprinkle the whole town in forgetful dust. In New York, Everafters need real jobs and a way to cover their tracks as beings who don’t age. The Wizard of Oz works at Macy’s, Ebenezer Scrooge makes a living as a medium, and pirates such as Long John Silver feed off of Wall Street. It also addresses the downsides of that. Everafters don’t age; some of them don’t even look human. It comes as a shock to Sabrina, but her mother, Veronica Grimm, was secretly working with the New York Everafters to fix their problems. I feel that Sabrina finding a connection to her mother through the Everafter community is the first step she takes toward accepting her role as a Grimm.

#5: Magic and Other Misdemeanors     8/10

The conflict between humans and Everafters starts to take center stage. Someone in Ferryport Landing is stealing powerful magical artifacts, causing rips in time, but the Grimms have to split their attention with Mayor Heart’s new tyrannical rule. This is where the series begins to take a darker turn. The new mayor, the Queen of Hearts, and Sheriff Nottingham are set on running every human in Ferryport Landing out of town, and the divides between human and Everafter are becoming more pronounced by the day. The rips in time are particularly interesting, especially Sabrina and Daphne’s trip to the future, which really raises the stakes going forward. Also, the idea of a past Grimm arriving in town, giving Heart and Nottingham a chance to end the entire family, is very nervewracking. Also, the concept of Everafter-human relationships and how that would work presents some interesting conflicts.

#6: Tales from the Hood     10/10

There’s nothing I love more than a fractured fairytale. Intent on getting rid of the Grimms’ staunch protector, Heart and Nottingham put Mr. Canis, or the Big Bad Wolf, on trial. Some investigation in order to clear his name reveals that the story of Little Red Riding Hood might not be all true. Technically, the entire series is based on fairytales, but this is the first book where those stories are actually challenged. The actual story of Little Red Riding Hood is amazing, and it also ties into all the other stories the Wolf is present in. Also, I love Red, the sane Red, and I always get so happy when she’s cured. Once again, Sabrina clashes strongly with her family in this one, for understandable reasons. I’m less inclined to side with her on this one, but she definitely learns her lesson.

#7: The Everafter War     8/10

The Grimms are finally united! Henry and Veronica Grimm are woken up from their magical sleep, but Henry, having too many bad memories, wants to leave town immediately. Unfortunately, the Scarlet Hand has taken over all of Ferryport Landing and only a small resistance stands in their way. There’s a lot of family drama in this one. The dynamics of Sabrina, Daphne, and their parents are all out of whack after spending over a year apart. On one hand, they now have parental support again. On the other, Henry can’t seem to conceptualize that Daphne is, in fact, not five anymore. If that isn’t enough drama for you, Puck finds out he and Sabrina are married in the future, and Snow and Charming are caught up in a soap opera of their own. Also, not to mention the plethora of betrayals in this book. The plot is really picking up here.

#8: The Inside Story     8/10

This one took quite some imagination. After the reveal of the Master’s identity as their own beloved Mirror, Sabrina, Daphne, and Puck pursue him and Pinocchio through the Book of Everafter, a living book filled with fairytales that could actually change history. I find it absolutely hilarious that the kids absolutely refuse to follow the story no matter what. Also, this is where Sabrina starts coming into her own. She’s going through a rough patch in this book. As would anyone whose best friend turned out to be the leader of a magical terrorist organization. By the way, if you are connected to these characters in any way, Mirror’s betrayal will hit you like a punch to the gut. She’s having trouble trusting her judgement, which will have her come back stronger than ever. Also, it’s nice to see her and Puck get through a couple sentences without a barrage of insults. Finally, Relda was such a badass in this book. If you didn’t love her before, you definitely love her now.

#9: The Council of Mirrors     9/10

It’s time for a happily ever after. With Mirror running loose in Ferryport Landing and the rebellion in tatters, things are looking bleak. Especially when the twenty-four remaining magic mirrors issue a prophecy putting everyone’s fate in the hands of Sabrina and Daphne Grimm. Sabrina starts out pretty broken in this book. She’s been betrayed, her grandmother is possessed by an evil mirror, and now everyone is expecting her to lead an army. I absolutely love that when she gets the push she needs from the mirrors it plays to her strengths. She’s a master of planning and subterfuge, and it’s so nice to see it come out. On a less chipper note, I hate Atticus with everything in me, and I was so happy he ended the way he did. In terms of Mirror, I found it poetic, but also so typical of a kid’s book, that he was defeated by the one thing he never had: love. Finally, the reason this book doesn’t get a 10/10 is because I felt the epilogues were kind of rushed and unrealistic. However, they don’t have much impact on the book overall, and I still loved most of it!

Overall 1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10

The Sisters Grimm is one of my favorite series from childhood. The characters are realistic, relatable, and get great development. Kids books are great because there’s no worries about the idea being too juvenile. This book could never be an adult book, the ideas in it are too silly. However, that doesn’t mean it isn’t amazing, and I find the crazy ideas and cheesy lessons absolutely charming. It gives some unexpected sides to some well-known characters, and the amount of thought that went into incorporating classic and even more obscure characters into the modern world was crazy and very amusing at times. I also suspect that this series is the root of my fondness for fractured fairytales. I would recommend this book to people who like modern fantasy, sibling relationships, and fairytale characters in a decidedly un-mystical setting.

The Author

Michael Buckley: American, 51 years old, also wrote N.E.R.D.S. and Undertow

The Reviewer

My name is Wonderose; I try to post a review every two weeks, and I take recommendations. Check out my about me post for more!

[hawkland]

Destiel fic recs/what I’ve been reading (round #1)

Since some folks seemed interested in me starting this, here’s a round-up of what I’ve enjoyed reading in the last...two weeks or so. Not sure how much of a schedule I’ll keep up with these posts, but I’ll try whenever I have a bunch to share before they get too cluttered in my bookmarks.

Some are new(ish), some are older stories, it’s just whatever I’ve stumbled upon via searching tags for particular cravings, recent exchanges, or other recs in the wild. Sixteen fics in total for this round, all below the cut. Basically stories I liked enough that I didn’t just bookmark but I downloaded, so I could re-read without fear of disappearing forever.

Season 15.18—15.20 Fix-its - because we cannot have enough of these ever, right?

One does not simply walk into the Empty by TheSilverQueen  (7.7k) I was practically screaming while reading this one. Because if you are Dean Winchester, that is EXACTLY what you do - walk straight into the Empty to get Cas back and pick a fight with the Shadow about it until you get your way. Inspired by the myth of Orpheus and Eurydice yet wonderfully in character. Might be my favorite fix-it to date because it just felt like...yes, I can see this happening. Exactly like this.

the noise of stars by depugnare (2.9k) - I love this for the look inside Cas’s thoughts and mind—going back to the dawn of creation and leading to his rescue from the Empty. Seems like a lot to cram into under 3k words but it’s very poetic and beautifully written, something that feels very angelic (also, I love the handling of Dean’s soul actually being quite broken after his time in Hell, something I feel isn’t dealt with nearly enough...?)

Enhanced Extraction Techniques by goldenraeofsun (5.8k) This one hurts so good. The Empty torments Cas with visions of Dean coming to rescue him over and over again. How can he know what’s real versus a dream? Bonus points for a nifty Law & Order reference (dun dun).

Occursus by PallasPerilous (4k). Heaven!fic, so read at your own risk. This one I loved for angel weirdness and strange biology at its finest. Dean’s soul basically gave Cas an angelic STD when he raised him from perdition. IDEK but it works and I loved it and if you like fic that skirts on the strange with lovely language, humor, and banter, this is for you.

These Old Bones by Destina (3.2k). Always a delight to share a fandom (once again!) with an author whose style and works I know I’ll enjoy. Wherein Dean and Cas straddle a unique line between Heaven and Earth in order to build the life-and home-together that they deserve. Loving and comforting and with just a touch of the bitter to the sweet.

Command Me to Be Well by prosopopeya (28k). This one hurts a lot before it gets better because they’re both emotional idiots in their own ways. It doesn’t matter in this story exactly how Cas got back; the real challenge is Dean (and Cas) figuring out how to deal with what comes next in the aftermath of Cas’s love confession. Dean acts like sex will be enough (and is all he can handle); Cas wants/needs far more than that, and it’s a long, long road to get there. If you want a story where they don’t just immediately work out great, happily-ever-after after fixing Cas’s death, this is one I’ll rec.

Nothing Equals the Splendor by RurouniHime (7.8k) I know I already mentioned loving this one but I have to put it on my official rec list. Kind of a contrast to the previous rec, here they don’t waste much time at all getting it on, once Cas is back. Delicious first-time fix-it sex with wings and so hot/explosive they practically trash the bunker. I really like smutty fic that doesn’t forget that Cas isn’t human so there are some...unique kinks in how they get it on.

surely heaven wants for you by cenotaphy (3.7k) Heaven fic with steamy first time sex outside. Just...a yummy read with enough angst and feelings to balance things out nicely.

*****

Human!Cas in Season 9 (canon-divergent AUs or Not) - This is where I was recently at on my complete watch-through, so I have a serious craving for human!Cas missing scenes, or AUs where he stays in the bunker with Dean, Sam and Kevin. Hence a lot of reading to scratch that itch.

La cucina. by orange_crushed (3.9k). Total food-porn delight. Dean enjoys bringing new foods for Cas to taste now that he is human and Dean is in the bunker kitchen cooking like the total domestic goddess housewife he is meant to be. This one is yummy in more ways than one and satisfies my craving for pleasure seeking!Cas as well as protective-mama hen!Dean. 

Bibliophile by tiamatv (4k). Human!Cas loves books, on a tactile level and on a story-telling level, too. Dean likes to cuddle. Cas tries to figure out how to read AND cuddle at the same time. Just a happy comforting read that’s like a warm and fuzzy blanket of squee.

A Room of His Own (or not) by Valinde (Valyria) (3k). This fandom is very, very good to this fan of delicious frottage and bedsharing and this is no exception. Especially when it features greedy-for-pleasure!Cas just totally hungry for new experiences and awkward about them at the same time.

Under the sun by orange_crushed (1k). Episode tag for 9x06. Bitchy Human!Cas hurt/comfort wound-care with bedsharing and just...electric with possibilities.

*****

My Wing!Kink let me show you it.

The Care and Feeding of Castiel by MalMuses (24k) Soft. So, so very deliciously soft. Soft!Dean nesting (in more than one ways) in the bunker. Unique and delightful angel-lore relating angels to birdlike-behavior including nesting urges/molting/even flight-or-fight instincts that explains so much of how Cas acts. This is a great AU with Cas starting to regain his wings as things calm down (in an alternative late season setting) and he starts to feel more at home in the bunker. Wing-grooming as he’s molting and regrowing damaged wings acts as a metaphor for Dean & Cas “grooming” and healing their relationship by finally talking about the hurt and miscommunication between them through the years. Much love. Such happy. A+ rec especially when there is @lizleeships art to go with it.

The Care and Keeping of Wings by nekosmuse (2.9k) Crackfic! Pure crack in the absolute best way possible! Cas comes back from Purgatory with.... something different about him. His wings are manifest and everyone can see them. Dean seems strangely proud of showing off his winged angel!babe...even when Cas has them pull over Baby for the perfect dust bath. Poor Sam must suffer both of these idjits and try to keep onlookers away.  IDEK but I loved it.

*****

Random other recs

Blessed Are Those Who Hunger by pollutedstar (3.6k) Character study of Dean and dark reasons behind some of his weird issues with food, relating back to 5.14 (My Bloody Valentine). I might caution that if you have any eating disorder triggers you might want to tread carefully, but otherwise this is a painfully good look at the things Dean will do to protect and care for those he loves.

Mary Winchester, Working On It by alittleduck (9.6k) Saw this one recced on fail_fandomanon and I had to check it out. Mary is trying to figure out Dean & Cas’s relationship. Dean thinks Mary is trying to come out as gay herself. Lots of great/hilarious TFW 2.0 dialog and family banter, and somehow it manages to skirt hitting my embarrassment squick despite the set-up and a lot of awkward situations.

[katsidhe]

Hello as a long time silent lurker with post notifications on, and someone who has been very into the minecraft roleplay for about 9 months, I am oh so incredibly intrigued on your thoughts! I hope you don't mind if I ramble a little. Sam (both minecraft and spn, but in this context the minecraft one) is one of my favourite characters because he's so incredibly complex. The prison story has sparked so much discussion and conflict in this fandom, so I would love to hear your thoughts if you want to share!

oh noooooooooooo don’t enable me. (Jk <3)

I’m putting this under a read more for those of you who don’t want to be inflicted with my minecraft roleplay brain worms. I would apologize but I think we’re well past that.

So, like, full disclosure that I am pretty new to dsmp and am surely missing out on big ol swathes of Essential Character Content, etc etc. But I do know the basics, and I’ve (naturally) watched all the Torture Box Content, because I mean come on, that’s my brand.

k so First of all, THE most essential part of any media: x-coded y girl. Dream is a textbook Cas-coded Sam girl. Sam (Minecraft) is a Cas-coded Dean girl. Quackity is a Dean-coded Sam girl. I’d say Tommy is Dean-Dean. Techno is, hmm, Cas-Cas. Okay, important part done.

Minecraft Sam is very fun! I find it absolutely delightful that he clings to moral high ground while torturing and starving a prisoner. And at least from what I’ve seen, there’s a lot of room for interpretation as to the level of guilt and involvement he actually feels about what’s being done to Dream. He goes back and forth between justifying the treatment as something Dream categorically deserves, and justifying it as a means to an end. Whether that end is the book itself, or whether it’s Quackity’s cooperation/satisfaction, or whether it’s some twisted and bloody sense of justice and duty, seems to vary wildly. On top of that, of course, is the irony that Dream was the one to give him this commission and this job in the first place: in every respect, it’s a duty to Dream (to punish him; to secure him; to uphold his rules) that Sam’s fulfilling. Dream isn’t the only one to suffer from Sam’s inflexibility surrounding the entire concept of Dream: Tommy and Ponk do too.

And yet it’s not the inflexibility that ends up hurting Dream the worst: it’s the gaps in that rigidity. If Sam had kept the prison operating as apparently originally commissioned, it would be inhumane but just about bearable: hardly the level of absurd, over-the-top war crime that it’s reached by now. His choice to begin starving Dream in earnest seems to have been mostly an emotional reaction, after Tommy’s death. (Ironic, too, that Tommy also suffered the result of this choice.) And this is fine, because it’s not active: it’s passive, something that’s happening by inaction. Same with giving Quackity specially made weapons and total carte blanche.

The level of trust that Dream has in Sam’s sense of duty is also fascinating. Even as late as the most recent stream, after the guy’s been permitting him to be tortured for months, Dream appeals to Sam’s need to keep Dream static, in one place as his prisoner, in order to save his life. Incidentally, I do think that convincing Sam to keep Quackity from straight-up murdering him is the only concession Dream was actually hoping to win with that conversation. because like, food and a courtyard visit? after a jail break? Like hell is Sam going to grant that, even before the stunt he and Techno pulled, and Dream knows it. I think that the rest of that conversation was just to deflect, and keep Sam from questioning Dream more sharply about whatever he and Techno have planned. Bringing up Tommy and letting Sam go off on his predictable diatribe about morality and just desserts seemed similarly strategic: Dream knows what Sam thinks about what kind of treatment he deserves. He’s had months to figure it out, and it wasn’t exactly rocket science to begin with.

Anyway, that trust is the same reason Dream appealed (unsuccessfully) to Sam when Quackity first showed up: it devastated him to realize that he’d miscalculated the degree of Sam’s willingness to set aside his duty in this one particular way. Quackity in general represents a HUGE blind spot in Sam’s otherwise completely rigid inflexibility: so huge it’s almost baffling, given what Sam was ready to do to Tommy and Ponk and Ghostbur. But Quackity represents a loophole Sam badly wants. He badly, badly wants some good old-fashioned vengeance, without dressing it up with any pretensions of procedure or justice, but he can’t allow himself to actively act on those impulses—or else he would be Bad, and he can’t have that. He has to believe himself to be Good, and he wants to indulge himself with Dream’s suffering anyway. So he explains that, actually, Dream’s treatment is Dream’s own fault. It’s hilariously deluded.

Which brings me to Quackity, because what makes Quackity fun is that he’s actually NOT hilariously deluded—not about this, at least. Unlike Sam, he’s not laboring under the insane mental acrobatics necessary to convince himself that torture is Good Actually. He knows that what he’s doing is terrible, but he owns it: he’s fine admitting that he enjoys it, that he’s doing this for personal gain and personal vengeance and not for reasons of high-minded civic duty. He’s justifying the torture with brutal simplicity: Dream has hurt him and Dream has something he needs, done and done. He seems to be a firm believer in vengeful and disproportionate retribution, just as with his whole Butcher Army thing. To which I say, neat and fun! I also really really enjoy the power dynamic between him and Dream. Dream is someone who commands respect and fear and power, who could murder Quackity with one hand tied behind his back if they were on equal footing, and who probably barely spared him a thought as a threat. Quackity lives in terror of the thought of Dream escaping and wreaking his vengeance. And Quackity is trying his very best to wrestle that power away from him.

He seems to be pretty unpracticed and ineffective at torture, too—like, yeah, I get this is Minecraft and props are limited, but torturing someone long-term with an ax and a sword is going to be more than a bit unwieldy. and did he even bring in health potions his first day? It’s pretty telling and hilarious that Sam is the one who offers the shears, a far more practical choice of tool. Not to mention that the entire premise of his interrogation gives Dream massive, massive incentive to never give Quackity anything. Quackity straight up admits to Dream that the information he wants is the only reason he’s letting Dream live, which is utterly counterproductive if he wants the book sometime this year. Functionally, he needs to torture Dream not merely into admission, but into suicide. And as the days and weeks and months pass, he’s still got nothing to show for it but growing vindictiveness, paranoia, and frustration. By the time of the latest stream, he’s completely lost the plot—his threats don’t even make sense, his violence is ineffective and unhinged and indiscriminate. He’s lost all leverage and he’s needlessly (re)made a powerful enemy in Technoblade.

So, like, characters like Lucifer are fun because they’re good at torture. Characters like Quackity are fun because they’re bad at torture. But that doesn’t much matter. He doesn’t need to be particularly talented, or strong, or skilled to make Dream’s existence hell: the bare facts of the situation are more than enough for that. What does he learn, over the course of these visits—what skills does he hone, what kinds of violence does he discover that he can stomach? What depths of ruthlessness and creativity and hatred does he discover within himself? What threats does he make that he finds himself following through on before he’s even thought through the implications? It’s a learning curve, for him and Dream both. They’re learning each other, they’re learning the corners of this little hell together. Dream wasn’t expecting him to be capable of this degree of hostility or violence. Quackity is sick of being underestimated.

Which brings me finally to Dream. My general and hastily-gleaned impression of the fandom gives me the distinct impression that there is somehow a school of thought convinced Dream’s earned this treatment? Which baffles me. not only in how its absurd extremity (daily torture in a tiny box for literal months, jesus fucking christ) isn’t something even the most terrible villain could earn, but also in how Dream himself strikes me more as a morally gray fallen/falling antihero type than anything else. I was honestly completely prepared to find him to be a straightforward Bad Guy pre-prison, but that’s not at all my impression. He’s clearly got people and things he cares about and wants to protect, and big picture goals he’ll ruthlessly sacrifice anything to advance (ahem Cas-coded Sam girl). Really, it’s more that roleplays don’t tend to lend themselves easily to those types of narrative classification: nearly every character is a POV character; consuming the content from every perspective is nearly impossible. There aren’t super neat ways to sort antagonists and protagonists in essential terms, only in their relationships to one another. In terms of manipulation, war crimes, power-grabbing, and general destruction, practically everyone on the server is guilty to some degree or another. Dream’s treated Tommy pretty damn terribly, but that hardly makes him unique. What does make Dream unique is that he’s been singled out for near-universally-agreed-upon confinement (which oh so conveniently aligns with him being held as a tool, for information). And that’s neat!

…Look, tldr I just like it when people are in torture boxes. more media should have torture boxes, they are good and fun. 

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

Top 10 favorite things about TFS?

Bold of you to assume I can narrow it down to just 10 things, but I’ll try my best. 

Here’s a list of things I LOVE about The Final Season of TWDG, starting from #10 and working my way down to #1.

10. Rosie is best girl and doesn’t die 

Listen, okay? If you give me a game with a doggo companion that I bond with only to have said doggo die for dramatic effect... you automatically lose 2 outta 5 stars on your rating. Case in point: Season 2.

However, tfs knew not to kill Rosie off for dramatic effect, knew it’d be cheap. Plus, Rosie is a sweetheart and I love that she helps Clementine come to terms with her past trauma with dogs and genuinely bonds with her. Rosie is best girl. 

9. Over the shoulder camera/controls 

They’re the best of the series, having come a LONG way since S1. Like, look... Don’t get me wrong. S1 isn’t unplayable or anything, far from it, but they’re not the greatest either. They’re pretty wonky at times, the fixed camera can get annoying when you’re moving around, and sometimes button presses don’t register. It’s definitely something I have to get used to whenever I go back and replay the entire series, and like I said, it’s not the worst controls in the world... but oh man, compared to TFS?

Have you ever played S1 and then jumped straight into TFS just to get a direct comparison of the two? Because I have and it’s jarring how much smoother, accurate, and overall better everything is in TFS.

Just... props, guys. Thank you for the over-the-shoulder, movable camera, thank you for the polished button prompts, and thank you for a run button that has Clementine go into a nice jog rather than a comical run or, eh... does nothing [lookin’ at you ANF... Javi slow].

It’s just so effortless to play. The most trouble I ever have is with doors but that’s a given- Doors make no goddamn sense in this series and I’ve given up trying to learn their secrets. Oh, and speaking of more improvements! 

The shooting mechanic in this game is leaps better than in S1. Y’all remember the Motor-Inn shootout? The one that was such a frustrating pain in the ass?? So much death and anger...

I still die sometimes when shooting the walkers with the bow, especially the ones that are on fire, but it’s nothing compared to the shooting mechanic in S1, so the biggest THANK YOU for that one. It’s actually enjoyable to shoot stuff this time around.

8. Collectibles 

You as Clementine get to pick up various collectibles to decorate her and AJ’s dorm with and it’s great. One of my favorite bits about this game is seeing Clementine wake up in this empty, lifeless room, and see it get brighter and brighter with every collectible you place throughout the game until you reach the final scene with AJ where the room is just FULL of life and personality. Like... it’s officially theirs. It’s such a good feeling! 

And the devs totally didn’t have to add the collectible system in, but I’m so thankful they did. I’m one of those people who gets every single collectible every single time I play. 

7. Ericson’s Boarding School for Troubled Youth

Y’know, I honestly can’t think of a better place for Clementine and AJ to end up than Ericson’s Boarding School for Troubled Youth. It’s awesome, I love it, what a great idea. I also love the sense of wonder when we step outside for the first time and see the inside of Ericson, as well as the others, walking around. Like even Clementine is taken back by it.

Because of course it makes sense for Clementine to end up in a school surrounded by people closer to her age rather than with a group of dumbass adults like in the past three games.

Here it feels like they’re all about on the same level. There’s no older person here belittling Clementine because “she’s just a child and doesn’t get it,” they’re just people, y’know? Hell, if anything, Clementine’s now the most experienced one!

The school’s great! I wouldn’t change a thing about TFS taking place here. The environments are beautiful and I love exploring the world. 

6. Marlon as an antagonistic character/final confrontation 

I have an entire Marlon character discussion/study so I won’t put too much time into this one, but I will say that I love Marlon’s part in tfs. I love him as a surprise antagonistic character, I love how chill he is in the beginning, I love the final confrontation at the end of ep1... I just really like Marlon, y’know?

Ray Chase gives a damn near perfect performance as Marlon, so much so that I wish he survived past ep1 just so that I could hear more of his acting. Marlon himself in an interesting look at a leader character hiding his shame and guilt while trying to maintain control over everyone [including himself] around him, only to be broken down when he’s found out. 

5. James 

I know people tend to be pretty split on James, but I personally really like his role in tfs. I love that they included a character who was apart of the Whisperers, and hell, if anything I’d like to know MORE about James’ past with them. 

I just find him and his whole “walkers are sort of people? kinda?” beliefs. Again, I know some people get annoyed with him because of his beliefs but I think he adds an interesting spin on the whole thing, y’know? Though I do love what a bitch he is if you don’t agree with him hahaha

James is a bitch and I love him, okay? I love his dumb walker mask, I love his dumb boyband hair, I love his whispery voice, and I love his backstory with the Whisperers and Charlie. I love this he’s trying so hard to be this pacifist that he ends up doing the literal thing he said he doesn’t want to do-- hurt people. Y’know... like attempting to kidnap AJ and threatening to break Clementine’s leg in the caves if he’s alive. 

Which, by the way, that whole cave scene is a thing. It’s wild and I love it but not for the reasons the devs probably wanted. Like... it’s a little hilarious? I know it’s not supposed to be! But I can’t take James seriously when he’s walkin’ around his hands on his hips all huffy and puffy, okay? It’s just wild. 

Anyway, I love James and wouldn’t get rid of him. Hell, I’m still waiting for my James with the Whisperers mini-series, Skybound. 

4. Ericson Crew

There isn’t a single character from Ericson that I don’t like, or that I’d get rid of, which is rare with these games. Thinking back to the previous games, there’s always at least one person I could do without or that I didn’t like. I adore all of them!

The Ericson crew just feels closer than previous groups. For starters, they’re way more likable than most in our previous groups. Even when there’s tension [and boy is there tension at points] you still get the sense that they don’t hate each other, unlike in our previous groups. They do in fact love each other as a family and will do what they can to protect one another.

Plus, they’re all interesting. They’re troubled youth and I love all of them! 

Aasim keeps a daily journal where he chronicles everything in hopes of learning from past mistakes to prevent future ones, he’s damn good with a bow, and he’s got a neat little soul patch on his chin.  

Ruby is the tiny yet fiery medic of the group who adamantly believes in manners yet used to chase teachers around with pitchforks. 

Brody is caught up in the twin mess with Marlon but she’s also shown to want an escape, a road trip where she and her friends can go see the beach, but she also suffers with anxiety and panic attacks and isn’t afraid to knock Marlon on his ass or swear at Clementine. 

Mitch is a grumpy, tall boy who looks after Willy like a brother, knows how to make bombs out of manure and propane, and used to fight his neighbors because they didn’t like his face. 

Omar is a sassy chef who has to have every ingredient just right otherwise he’s salty for a week and he can take a bullet to the leg like a champ. 

Willy’s a goober who can climb trees like you wouldn’t believe and he made a bomb of his own in Mitch’s honor that completely wrecked the delta’s ship. 

Tenn is a soft, naïve boy who draws and reads but isn’t afraid to stab a walker bitch if he has to. 

Violet was sent to the school after witnessing her grandmother’s dead, she used to date Minerva who is now “dead,” has abandonment issues,  tries to give off the appearance of a grumpy grump but like once she’s comfortable with you she’ll tell you her life story and do romantic shit like dancing and painting you a pin. 

Louis was sent to Ericson because he was a rich brat who broke up his parents marriage because they wouldn’t let him take singing lessons and has felt like garbage ever since, using humor to cope and push people away, and keeps the façade on until someone’s willing to see past it in which he’ll finally bare his soul to you, name a song he wrote after you, and do everything in his power to keep you and everyone else safe over himself. 

I just... Love ‘em all. 

3. Clementine and AJ’s dynamic 

To think that they almost killed AJ off, or kept him a minor character. That would’ve been a shame and an absolute waste because Clementine and AJ’s dynamic is super fucking good in tfs. 

It’s actually a little baffling that AJ’s as good as he is, from his writing to his voice acting, he’s just great. And his relationship with Clementine is definitely one of my favorites to come from this game. It’s not perfect, but I don’t want perfect. 

I love that AJ looks to Clem for guidance and I love the way our choices affect him, even when it’s a case of the bridge scene. Hate the bridge scene knowing that I gotta sacrifice a character I care about for another I love, but I can’t deny that I love how that choice is made. After everything, do you trust AJ or not? 

Plus, their conversations are so well done, their chemistry is through the roof, and I wouldn’t change it. 

Oh, and the barn scene? Gets me every time, even though I already know everything’s fine and gonna work out. Still gets me. 

2. Clementine is Bisexual

I’ve talked about this in the past, but lemme just say that I love the fact that Clementine is canonically bisexual. 

Doesn’t matter if you’re dating Louis, Violet, or no one, Clementine is still bisexual. The game confirms it through it’s text/subtext and Clementine’s actions that we don’t have control over, and the devs confirmed it. She ain’t straight, she ain’t a lesbian, she is bisexual. 

I can’t express how happy that makes me. Just... 💗💜💙

And with her being bisexual comes her two great love interests: Louis and Violet. They’re amazing, and such an improvement over the previous game’s attempt at love interests... ahem, y’know... Kate.

1. Louis as a character/his relationship with Clementine 

I mean... c’mon. Y’all knew what #1 was gonna be. Do I even need to explain? This entire blog is just me gushing about Louis/clouis. 

Look, Louis is my favorite non-playable character across the entire series. Hell, even when you factor in playable characters, he’s STILL my absolute favorite. Like, even outside of his relationship with Clementine, I find him to be such a compelling character by himself. 

Like I mentioned above, he came from a stupid rich family who gave him everything he ever wanted, but when his father wouldn’t let him take singing lessons, he literally worked for over a year to break up his parents marriage because “you get to be happy or you get to be rich, can’t be both.” 

He gets sent to Ericson where the apocalypse happens, he never gets to make up with his parents, and he ends up using jokes and piano as a coping mechanism to deal with everything, falls into a cycle of being unreliable and the butt of the joke, and lives one day at a time without much thought for the future. 

He puts on the happy jokester persona to push people away from knowing the real him and rarely shares much about himself. Hell, when Clementine does hunting and decides to take care of the walker with him, he actually does let down the wall for a minute to share his view on “this moment” before looking away like “Oof, shared too much-- HEY, GO CHECK ON AASIM :D I’LL BE OVER HERE :D FIXING THE TRAP :D and adjusting the wall ahem--” 

It’s so interesting because you’d think that he’d be more open about his past with Marlon or the twins or whatever [like Violet is] but no, he doesn’t tell you shit about his past until EPISODE 3 and you have to work to get that story. 

I just... I just love him. Could talk about and analyze his character for hours. And I love his relationship with Clementine. It’s just so good. The piano scene where they finally admit their feelings for one another?? That shit has my entire heart. Their entire relationship is my favorite. What else is there to say?