#they dont really care abt us
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juggling two job offers and trying to negotiate for a bigger salary has me feeling like i need a kevin day on my shoulder telling me i should refuse to be paid anything less than what iβm worth. save me corporate weapon kevi day save me
#dont get me wrong im very happy to be in a position to pick at all! and i liked both companies very much#BUT IT IS STRESSFULβ¦!!#i dont like telling people noβ¦.#im not a corporate weapon im a lackadaisical friend-maker with people pleasing issues#but im like omg am i being too coldβ¦. am i being too ambitiousβ¦#i guess the good thing about working in tech is that theres more room for negotiation still but ah! ach. you know.#well i guess we will wait and see#save me keviβ¦ kevi save meβ¦#txt#kevin#but also i was talking to my friend and she was like soooo shocked id even have the gall to negotiate#so at least that made me feel better like omg we really are in this protestant work method shit for lifeβ¦ lets free ourselves sister#they dont really care abt us
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I'm an "AroAce Stereotype" I'm Romance averse/Repulsed> I'm Sex repulsed I'm non-partnering I hate the idea of marriage in all forms I don't want a QPR at all I'm loveless I'm someone who gets uncomfortable at sexual talk and sex jokes I'm someone who often has innuendos or sexual concept fly over my head. I'm someone who can't tell when someone is flirting with me I'm someone who can't pick up on romantic or sexual tension I'm someone who finds "shipping" to be annoying I'm someone who says "They just seem like friends to me" I'm someone who believed that attraction could be turned on or off I'm someone who can't make sense of romance at all and cant figure out what makes it different from every other relationship. I'm someone who thinks romance is stupid and sex is gross and I don't understand the big deal everyone makes about it I'm someone who never was upset to find out I was AroAce but rather relieved as I have a genuine fear of being stuck in a romantic relationship that i do not want. In all cases I am not an AroAce who can be considered "normal" by the standards of allo society.
I'm not just a stereotype for you to shit on. I'm not the reason aphobes are aphobic I'm not a problem that you need to erase and refute to be accepted by allos. I'm not an experience that you and ignore as "not really how aspec people are" just because You are not part of it. Stop leaving us behind. Stop throwing us under the bus. We deserve support too. We deserve to not be demonized and shunned because we're an "stereotype". We are not the problem. We are not a problem to be fixed. start fighting aphobes on their logic instead of trying to make up for our existence.
#text#ace#aro#asexual#aromantic#aroace#arospec#acespec#aspec#mostly talking abt aroace experience because thats me#but this can go for other aspec identities too#aphobia#im just tired of other aspec people agreeing with the oppressors that certain experiences are wrong#and promising that THEY aren't like that THEY are normal and shouldn't be ridiculed#but never do anything to protect the rest of us from ridicule#because really they just want to protect their experience they dont care about the wider community#and it's frustrating#because we should all be supporting each other because thats how things get better#if we tell aphobes there are exceptions then suddenly all aspec people can become an exception#because they dont care about us being socially acceptable aspecs they care about us not being aspec period#they dont want us to exist because then they have to question their world view and that dont like doing that#so they'll play nice with the ones they can pretend are normal before they decide that you're not good enough either
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a thing about rtd's era that i really really love seeing again is how he will usually wrap up the plot 10 or even 20 minutes before the episode ends and then the rest of that time is just dedicated to the characters talking to each other and dealing with their emotions and situations. like instead of a last minute win and a two minute goodbye they always get these massive spans of time to really get into everything emotionally and it always makes the episodes hit even harder
#this is rly on my mind since i just finished rewatching s3 too and like. the end of the#world plot wraps up in like 30 minutes the rest is just the characters talking to each other it's so good. houghhdgdgh#like they always leave so much time for everyone to just. HAVE CONVERSATIONS. and every#character has so many little things they do like for example martha calling up the ppl she#met during the year that never was.. like. you could say those scenes weren't necessary coz they#dont add anything to the plot and they really dont! we coulda spent that time on the Big Bad Villain. and yet it's a#much better use of that time because it makes everything feel so much more real#yes these ppl wont even remember meeting martha but here they are. they're okay and she cares abt them so much#same with the new ep like the plot ends at like minute 40 the rest is just them hanging outπππ it's so good....#doctor who#14th doctor#10th doctor#15th doctor#rtd#the giggle
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love thinking kipperlilly spends her afterlife looking for lucy in a familiar forest
#not art#fhjy#fhjy spoilers#like. does she have a mean of knowing lucy and yolanda got sent to cassandra's domain to hang out for a bit#kipperlilly's isolation means so much to me. she is punished for everything she's done she just doesn't pick up on it#until the moment she dies! one more funky thing that mirrors riz in which he's actively tried to cultivate a community and denied it#until the bad kids. while kipperlilly does not want or care about a community she just wants someone who validates her#but she does Need a community so she latches onto the person she lets closer to her to fulfill her emotional needs#she took the ritual willingly so this might genuinely be her first death. probably terrifying#probably not even enough bandwidth to feel mortified. maybe immediately seeking something comforting out of instinct alone#lmao honestly thinking too much abt fantasy high afterlifes gives me a headache And a visceral fear#Im not religious but I grew up in a culture with a dominantly buddhist/taoist cosmology its Scary that u just go to A Place after u die!!#and then ur still urself!!! thats scary to me what do u mean u stay like that forever. thats fucked#but yeah I think this influences how I see kipperlilly turn out a little bit. in a sense I think of her as being a ghost now#yknow. trying to solve something from life so she can move on and. stop living this life etc#man the reveal that lucy took being killed pretty seriously and is like yeah the others are decent and even sweet#and probably was just trying to hold her party together and do what she thinks is moral by hearing kipperlilly out#lol lmao etc. gods I gotta wonder how kipperlilly's mindset handled jawbones' help#it really is damn tragic tho. I stand by what I said folks like this will complain and be nasty to be around#but they dont have enough desire to inconvenience themselves to off the bat do something abt what they find unfair or whatever#its when theyre handed the seemingly very easy means to be right that they'll start being dangerous#its horribly tragic that the supposed metaplayer and the self-perceived mastermind turned out to ultimately be just an useful idiot#yknow what. I think personally in my heart kipperlilly moves on from her afterlife the moment she says sorry#doesnt even have to be to lucy but that's probably gonna be who received it#ah.... teenage rebellion. teenage gamejacking
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grrriaanwwnananannn i tried to make a cool effect but its not really that cool
sorry fo the casual negativity but im going through the craziest art crisis ever and like im completely overhauling as much as i can from my old art style so all i have rn are doodles ahhhh its so frustrating but i feel like i should post somethin anyway just to make me feel better
#dsmp dni#as much as that will help anything#hermitcraft#hermitcraft whatever season honestly#hermitcraft is very long i realized#in the early episodes of grians season 6 pov rn#ive watched it out of order so i mean i finished season 8#if youve seen that one time i talked abt hermitcraft in my tags#u know how scared i am to post any hermitcraft fanart#not because im not proud but because im just scared#minecraft smp fandoms areβ¦. not always the kind of people i want to attract#no shade i just dont have a lot of faith#grian#does this count as a specific grian#i dont know any of the grian lore#or any lore#i really dont care about the lore#theyre just funny guys building cool shit on a big server#grian fanart#hermitcraft grian#i dooonnnt know really#i usually use tumblr tags as like a personal diary but rn im just feeling bitter#I HATE MY ART!!!! I HATE DRAWING!!!#the art crisis is less an art crisis and more an identity crisis#i think im getting on the right foot with my art wnd then i feel like i mess it up?#digital art especially i just hate everything i do digitally#really negative what a debby downer am i right#but nobody actually reads tumblr tags#also its my blog i can be a debby downer on my blog#for archivial purposes obviously
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i kind of dont like the chilchuck interpretation that he's viewing the rest of the party as 'replacements' for his kids.... like not only does chilchuck not need 'replacements' for his daughters, bc he's still in contact with them, but also that framing very significantly changes his dynamic with the rest of current party (who are all adults). like i dont think a character who's been infantilized throughout his adult life and is very cognizant of party dynamics would do that?
#like i do think he gets something out of caring for others (and on some level he's used to it and its become a habit)#but i think its more of a routine/structure/who he is as a person thing.... idk#its conflating 'caring' with 'parenting' in a really weird way imo#like he is not 'fathering' senshi or laios and he's not really doing it for marcille either imo#he's just neurotic + performs 'caring' through acts of service#i think as im typing im realizing it might be a semantics/word choice issue bc i can see why ppl would see this behavior and immediately#call it that. but i still dont think its accurate/i dont like the phrasing bc of how it reframes the party dynamic. idk#his thing w izutsumi is different but. again: still not a replacement for his daughters and i have more to say abt their relationship#that isnt relevant to this post#L.txt#dungeon meshi#chilposting
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hope everyone is doing well ^_^ ive been pretty non-zelda brained lately so its been a little tough wanting to keep drawing stuff from it LOL though i know it'll be back. Eventually. in the meantime its just a little difficult trying to figure out what id like to Draw and then the additional nuance of what id like to draw + what can i post on this blog
#i would like to open commissions up soonish or maybe around december for christmas time. keep it simple and stuff#probably mainly furry and anthro stuff cus im not super confident with people still LOL but we'll see#anyway its not an issue of like. i want to post only zelda stuff here bcus tbh i dont really care abt using sideblogs#just like. its difficult to draw if im not also slightly obsessed with that piece of media in one way or another#anyway if u start seeing stuff like warrior cats or pokemon here or whatever else in the future dont be surprised i guess#heart emoji. okay. yoshi is going to eat me and turn me into an egg now#personal.txt
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stomach hurts. im gonna beam that to swagkitty
#brickbattler#swagman#coolman#brickbattler takeover au#roblox#roblox fanart#roblox art#fanart#artists on tumblr#illustration#crowart#crowpost#dont worry abt that au tag its gonna be fineeeee ahaaaaaaaaaa#just uh. dont look at how swags horns are more sharper. or the corruption. its normal its fine! even. mhm#thanks malo for saying this au all those months ago it just always ruins my life huh#coolkitty has a hint of blue if u care. bc. the hairdye of bb trio used to be blue.... if u care.......#did i ever takeover au yet. anyways its postgame that swag takes over robloxs job. its going well!!!!! except uhm he. is Not experienced#and bad decisions can really snowball . more n more..... whoopsie
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i want someone like jac schaeffer for doctor who. not someone with her vision necessarily but someone with her approach to storytelling in a huge franchise
#this is NOT bc i want lesbian thoschei#it wouldnt hurt#but this is bc shes like so good at storytelling#and i want someone who like. can play WITH the unwieldy universe youve got to work with and use it to their advantage#i think that would be great for doctor who#i really want to see what someone smart and good with stories can do with the doctor who universe as it's been built#bc it's a little collpasing under its own weight i feel like#we need someone to turn that tower around#use what we have in a beautiful new vision idk#and a writer who is committed to it. who cares abt it. whos smart with it#from superficial lip service to a story actually ABOUT that thing you know what i mean?#and what that about is about i actually dont really care that much#personally i'd like to see someone do chibnals themes of colonisation and empire#but theres SO much to explore in the universe of doctor who and we are STUCK bc it's always the same writers#i would be excited about any theme or story if it was being executed with the care and skill we see in agatha all along & wandavision#i dont actually know her relationship with marvel maybe she doesnt care abt it at all#i do want someone who cares about doctor who. the franchise the universe. enough to want to take advantage of it#use the MEDIUM of this universe#anyway
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hi, if this doesn't bother you, what are your pikase headcanons?
do you have au with them?
also i love the blog idea, it's so cute have a place were the pikase fans can talk about them π
hiiiii anon i did not realize how much i would have to say about this ive been writing this reply for hours sorry long post inkoming lmfao
my funny little general headcanons can fluctuate for whatever i wanna do but the solid ones are that fukase is disabled and does tech support and piko is a robot and does a lot of programming stuff, they join forces to build silly little robots together and theyre always looking out for each other
more random ones are stuff like the height i draw fukase with fluctuates but hes never taller than piko, both of them are some flavor of transgender (i personally like unlabeled piko and intersex fukase), piko is mikis sibling and shes dating miku append, both of them are robots and id love to draw a double date at some point, i dont really have any mikippend headcanons but i love them sm too omg and i like to draw piko with funny little hologram windows he can acess the internet from and i think thats just kind of a robot thing robots can do :]
the only thing i can consider an au that i have with them is what i call "memesquad from the mirror dimension" or "seriousquad" which is this note on my phone where i wrote every single personality trait i could think of from talkloids i saw around 2018-2020 and reversed them heres what i wrote for fukase and piko
also AWWW TYYY thats so sweet yeaaaaaaah shipping vocaloids is all fun and games until you realize that unless your otp is from crypton you cant find SHIT about them, id love to have my blog seen as a little hub where all of us can sit around a campfire and chat about our silly ship omg π₯Ί
pikase being a rarepair baffles me specifically because of the memesquad, idk why but at least on my time on that side of the fandom some years ago it was always super hard to find any pikase stuff which always confused me since they're both In The Deam Memesquad. PERFECTLY good gay couple in there guys. why does no one see the vision. i vividly remember this one time i was like 13 reading a crack ask fic on wattpad and the only time pikase was even hinted at it was played off as a complete Joke and it made me so upset lmao
i only have around 40 followers here but it makes me so happy to see so many people that share my love for this ship, the rarepairness of it always made me feel so alone, back when i only used twitter there was 1 artist that Sometimes posted pikase stuff and that was all i had, genuenly i am willing to bet that im currently one of the only active pikase artist out there lmao, i say this in my bio but i made this blog to just get me to draw them more and be more shameless about MY FUCKING OTP and i genuenly never expected to see more than like 5 people on my notes, even if someone just silently likes and reblogs a drawing with no comment attached it still always makes me so warm inside even, ive gotten at least 2 people saying "OH MY GOD AN ACTIVE PIKASE BLOG" on my notes and i share the sentiment deeply. hell yeah. theres more of us out there >:D
#the height thing is solely based on the jjinomu tda models that i used to fucking love some years ago#but now the way pikos haircut is innacurate to the boxart really bothers me lol#which is fucking incomprehensible considering its a SUPER detailed model#if you can get the tiny details right how do you fuck up the hair????????#ask#anon#not a drawing#pikase#peak and awsome ask anon <333#another thing i intentionally didn't mention it on my main post because this is not what this blog is about but why does olikase#specifically have such a grip on the memesquad fandom like idc abt what you ship but i dont understand how this one ship has such a monopol#on the 14 year olds. where did it come from. in my experience in the memesquad fandom it was the only ship people cared about and im just#really curious how one pairing can completely take over a fandom like that. why was there no shipping diversity if you wanted to watch sill#silly little talkloids you had to be down with olikase and floko specifically#for what reason lmao#like i said in vc with a friend the other day#theres a perfectly good gay couple in there. you dont need to get the child involved#also fuuuuuuck i havent drawn in a while need to fix that
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I fucking hate Sam Winchester
#I donβt#he just really gets in my nerves#I DONT CARE ABT YOU HAVING DEMON BLOOD#STOP FUCKING USING IT#LET DEAN HAVE HIS MOMENT#PLEASE#I love him still but my god#Iβm on season 4 w#ep like 17#idk man#supernatural#spn#sam winchester#dean winchester
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MAN your art, but especially the latest pieces of Walking Fire Friend and Sparkle Dog really have the vibes of like, sanrio?? I want stickers and half a dozen accessories with them plastered all over so bad
!!! thank u for the kind words!! im playing around with the halftone effect, i like how it makes it look like a newspaper comic ^_^
#i also wanna design stickers so sososo bad.. id love to make some skip to loafer stickers with the main four <3#i dont reallyknow much abt the process itself though.. and i dont have a paypal or any way to send or receive money in the first place orz#im sure ill do it once i figure it out but i appreciate the sentiment!!!#its been my dream to make my own custom motivational stickers with little dogs.. like the ones i used to get in grade school lol#im not sure if ill keep going in this direction with my art bc its all experimental but its been really fun playing around with it#its bothered me for the longest time that im just ass at rendering or putting detail in my art. but at the end of the day i just dont#care enough to go thru with it and i prefer to keep things simple anyway so that reflects my own tastes ig...#this is probably the closest ill get to a soft render that i like to see so if i could do more for that ill definitely try...!!!!#yapping#ask#answered#doodles#sona#puppysona
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wish i had a girl bestie where we genuinely deeply cared for eo and abt eo and wanted the best for eo and supported comforted eo etc etc </3
#really dont think that exists anymore bc like....#yeah π€π€π€π€ dont wanna be called a pick me bitch again (as if i think guys would be safer friends πΉπΉπΉ)#but in general i just think the human soul have become so fucking profoundly rotten these past years#nobody cares about anyone anymore#everything is about usefulness and living the correct way and shutting the fuck up#and humans are like soulless robots where all thy do is victim blame eo#silence eo. there is only apathy and cruelty#people dont care at all abt others' wellbeing and health lmao#genuinity and empathy and compassion and true support dont exist anymore...#anyways... i hope everyone dies ^-^
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A little appreciation post for my dad for fathers day cause i love him and im very greatful to have a dad who loves me and is in my life and one of my favorite memories is that when he bought his first house two years ago he wanted me to be the first person to step foot in the house aside from him cause i always believed in him and he knows hes not perfect and has made mistakes but i couldnt ask for a better dad.
#he always wanted the like nice house with rooms for all of us kids and a nice big yard and he tried but the rescession and divorce#and family loss and trying to get upward movement in his job without a degree didnt always allow for that but he tried#and i told him id always believed he'e get a house one day and itd be all his and he did and when it happened he got me#on a cross country train so thatd id be there i literally sat right next to him as he signed the papers and got the keys#and i find it interesting cause the first time o saw it it looked exactly like the house from my dreams like down to the layout it#it was just all so meant to be#and while i dont physically see him as much and id like theres never a day were i dont get a text or call or instagram reel sent and he#often tells me abt how proud he is of me and how he loves me and hes always believed in my dreams and anything i want to do and im also#really proud of him cause hed told me before he never wanted to be like his father who was not around and the breif time he was wasnt good#and hes never been like thats hes alwayd been loving and caring and supportive and trys the best he can hes always been a great dad#and i know not everyone gets that or even gets to have a dad so im very very greatfull that i do
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hearing "how are you feeling? are you getting enough sleep? are you taking anything for it? are you drinking water?" from the besties: π₯Ίπ₯Ίπ₯Ίπ₯Ίπππππ₯°π©·β£οΈπππππππππππππππβ£οΈπ©·π₯°ππ₯°π₯°π©·ππ₯°ππ©·ππ©·πβ£οΈπβ£οΈπβ£οΈππ₯°ππππππππππ₯°ππ₯°ππ©·β£οΈππ©·ππ©·ππ©·ππππ₯°π₯°π₯°π₯°π₯Ίπ₯Ίπ₯Ί
hearing "how are you feeling? are you getting enough sleep? are you taking anything for it? are you drinking water?" from your parents: πππππππ₯π¬π₯πππππππππ₯π¬ππ¬πππππππ¬π₯π¬π₯ππ¬πππ₯π₯πππ₯π¬π₯ππ¬ππππππππ₯π₯ππ₯π₯π₯π₯π₯π₯π₯π₯π₯π₯
#idek man#when cherry asked earlier i fucking Melted it was the sweetest thing ever#but my parents asking me the same shit just now made me want to kill#something something knowing someone genuinely cares about u and cares abt the answer vs#the amt of times i used to hear well are you really sick? are you too sick to go to school? yeah of course you are#really convenient of you to be sick today huh. yeah sure go miss school not like youre missing multiple classes or anything#<- when im sick my kneejerk response is to '''play it up''' bc i know i feel bad but i dont know how to express w/ my face and voice that-#-i feel bad so theyd always assume i was lying and i had to learn how to actually act sick instead of them trusting me at all#.#is that an autism thing. is having to teach yourself how to express that you dont feel well bc your face and voice just Dont Do It an-#autism thing guys be honest. <- learned a lot abt facial expressions & autism the other day and now things r starting to click#alyalyoxenfree
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ohhhh my fucking god nobody needs to like know any of this medical tmi but it is literally 11 pm and if im kept up one minute longer when i just laid down trying to go to sleep by my mother YELLING REPEATEDLY that she needs to pee. im going to actually go insane. she got a catheter in. Yesterday. it is working. she won't listen to anyone when they tell her that this is the case. help me jesus. im sure if a nurse comes to check on her tomorrow they'll probably get the same response. my brain will simply explode
#crow.txt#the absolute levels of stress im under could create diamonds out of free floating carbon atoms my fucking god#can i have. Literally just one day of peace. just one!! fuck!!!!#at least now i have SOME validation from everyone else of shit that mom has honestly kinda always done#be absolutely furious and bitchy usually for no good goddamn reason and then immediately turn it off to look good in front of someone else#i had a feeling mom coming home was gonna be utterly miserable sooner rather than later#i literally cannot leave my room without her yelling for dad bc she thinks im him i guess. she has gotten him up like 4 times now#what the fuck do you want any of us to doooooooooooo. according to dad shes also just been really fucking hateful today#including to her SISTER who has been facilitating literally everything medically for her for the last month plus#like on one hand i know its hard and frustrating etc etc absolutely. on the other. what the fuck are you yelling at any of us for!#whatd we do! not a damn thing for the most part! holy shit im exhausted#and then im sure she will have the audacity to wonder why i dont really want to interact with her much rn#its very apparent she doesnt really understand whats going on or how much of anything works at this point including hospice care#but i truly cannot help you when your knee jerk response is to yell and be abusive. like. dads not been great either#bc hes also one to bitch and moan and yell abt shit. but like. so is mom. more than usual#and ill actually be damned if i let her treat me like that honestly ever again. like idk for once i can just#walk away from this behavior with zero consequences. i dont have to take it anymore. im not free but at least im fuckin closer than i was#guess my aunt wasnt kidding when she said her being coherent and rational last week might be the calm before the storm
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