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I think one of the biggest tragedies of Laios & Falin and their relationship is how much his actions impact her life. But like. Specifically how much they WOULDN’T impact her life as much if they weren’t both stuck in such a shitty abusive situation.
This part of the Falin-tries-makeup daydream hour comic is what got me thinking about it again because truly it just... it seems like such a like an offhand comment that I'm sure Laios didn't mean to be cruel or anything. That's just like. A little kid not thinking about what they are saying. ESPECIALLY when the kid in question is Laios.
But man they depended on each other SO much as kids. Too much. It really feels like they didn't have any other source of positive reinforcement, or anyone else to share themselves with. So of course an offhand comment like that has a huge impact on Falin.
Or this little bit from one of the flashbacks:
This tears me apart. Do you think it tears him apart to think about? I think it does. I think Laios holds every small failure to care for Falin against himself.
And then there's the Bigger stuff. The way that him coping with his own trauma ended up impacting her.
Like his interest in monsters. Like him going to find a ghost, and accidentally revealing Falin's magic to the whole village in the process.
Like him needing to leave. And leaving her behind.
He shaped her life so much, and he carries so much guilt for it. And again, there should have been other people there to help. The same things that made Laios need to leave home are the things that made his leaving so hard on Falin. She ate alone after that. She shouldn't have had to eat alone just because Laios wasn't there.
She was 9 when he left for school, and he was 11.
Nine. And Laios feels like he failed her because he didn't stand by her through this better. As an eleven year old.
Both of these kids deserved so much better from the world.
#dunmeshi analysis#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#falin touden#laios touden#dungeon meshi spoilers#AND this isn't even getting into her leaving the academy & how much it seems like that was directly tied to how poorly he was doing#there's a comic in the adventurer's bible where marcille is like 'yeah she had a job lined up and everything'#and like. do you think he feels bad for that too#like he wrecked her life by leaving#and wrecked her life by showing up#what do you even do at that point. if you feel like a failed protector when you are away & and a burden when you return#unable to make yourself accept. unable to make yourself resist#Laios strongest moment is when he lets himself accept that. the contradiction of his life & his relationship with Falin#that he has to kill her to save her#as a small note this came out a little more focused on Laios' POV with this stuff but Falin's experience of it is v important to me too#didn't mean to sideline her but her feelings about stuff are more speculative and probably need a post of their own
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i know the pain is nauseating. i know you are disappointed. i know you feel betrayed. i know it feels hopeless and bleak. i know you're tired.
please don't disappear.
please be kind.
please continue to take care of yourself.
please keep living day by day.
please live. out of spite. out of hope for a better tomorrow.
if you are POC, queer, femme, trans, disabled, you are loved. you are wanted. i may not know you, but i love you with my whole person. there is still good in this world, this isn't the end.
#important#us politics#pingyappathon#if you need to step away to take care of yourself then please do so. stop doomscrolling.#there so many good marginalized people who cannot leave this country. we have to stay and fight#if not for ourselves then for those who can't.#by nature and job occupation i am a caregiver my heart aches for everyone and myself#personally i live out of rage and bloodlust for my enemies. i fought too hard and too long for my happiness.#i wont back down or give up for myself or others.
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I’ll be honest I get soooo giddy whenever an ISAT fanwork depicts that the Mirabelle/Siffrin relationship is equally as important as the Isabeau/Siffrin one. Like, it’s not just the romantic relationship that is The Most Important thing narratively+literally, but the platonic one is equally as important too!
#IM NOT HATING ON ISAFRIN BTW I LOVE THEM TOO#THEY ARE THE SILLIES EVER#but the fandom does such a good job showing how aroace folks aren’t secondary to the romantic ships#making fanworks that I've usually only ever seen for romantic shipping used for platonic ones too#it makes me so happy to see#(also also adding on how important odile + bonnie is makes it even better 🥹🥹 they are all family and they are all equally important to#each other)#do!! not!! seperate!!!!!!#isat#moon speaks#q
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That viral post that's going around about how people who write "book quality" mlm fic are too "normal" to publish and have real jobs so only "weird" people publish their "shitty" fanfic is so completely out of touch with reality and I am giving a massive side eye to everyone reblogging it.
Not only is it completely, easily verifiably untrue (you cannot enter any professional writing space without tripping over a dozen grizzled scifi writers who got their start by filing off the serial numbers and publishing their Star Trek fanfic even going back decades ago??? it's a whole thing?? plus how can you look at the mlm category on Amazon right now and say with a straight face that people aren't publishing shitty Spirk and Stucky fanfic??? Oh, honey...) it's also the perfect example of this kind of sneering elitism that true artists would never sully themselves by seeking profit, they do it only for the purity of the thing that always somehow leads back to, "no one should be paid to make art, actually."
The only reason you're seeing more published fanfic right now has nothing to do with the idealistic purity of your hypothetical government employee written smut of the past vs the debased scribbles of those awful straights of today and everything to do with the fact that a) self-publishing has created a voracious readership that wants a ton of content so it's become a viable, flexible income stream for many, especially disabled people b) anyone can publish now with self-publishing tools so there are less gatekeepers and c) lockdown got a lot of people into fandom and therefore writing who never tried it before.
And if you really think there's no "shitty" published mlm and no "book-quality" m/f writing out there that started as fanfic, then you are clearly not a reader so why are you even talking about this?
#love how they manipulated people into spreading that post by making it seem like a cishet vs gay thing#when the real message is OP thinks trying to sell your writing is cringe and 'weird' and 'normal people' with jobs would never#which would of course never have flown on the fandom website#so they played into the queer shipping is purer than cishet shipping puriteen thing#and it worked!#because my god people are gullible#this is the direct pipeline that leads to AI thievery#''normal' people write for the joy of it anyway so why do you need pay? you are just greedy and 'weird'!'#'oh no this isn't about who we get to call cringe and who gets to profit from art it's about um...#(quick what's a hated m/f ship?).. oh uh 'shitty' REYLO#and not our super pure uh... (spirk is still popular right? lets throw in that avengers one too to make it seem timely) stucky!'#I'm sorry if I have no sense of humor about this but the year is 2024 and people are still way too ready to sneer#about writers trying to earn a fucking living in the shittiest timeline#and i need you to look deep into yourself and ask you why it's so important to you to tell yourself that only people writing what you like#are 'normal' with real jobs and to vilify everyone else as 'weird' and 'shitty'#for trying to make an income during a financial fucking crisis#i would say sorry for ranting about this but I'm not sorry because wtf#write whatever you want#publish whatever you want#there is no moral fucking purity in what the content is#and one thing certainly doesn't make you more 'weird' or 'normal' than the other#like there is soooo much shitty mlm that started as fanfic???#that post is 100% OP made up some guys to get mad about and called them relyos for the clicks#writing#publishing#writblr#writeblr#i wasn't going to tag this anything but you know what fuck it I'm mad#i had like 5 more tags but tumblr cut me off which is fair 😅#fan fiction
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Time to spread my Charles and Edwin are Orpheus and Eurydice reincarnated agenda
Dream, please come get your son, he keeps going down to hell to save his partner
#dead boy detectives#the sandman#edwin payne#charles rowland#you can't just mention orpheus#in a show set in the SANDMAN universe#and expect me to act normal#do you have any idea how important his death is to the plot?#make no mistake#he IS 100% death on the show#a talking head would look too silly on live action and the show has done a great job on deciding what to change and what not to change#Orpheus is dead#but perhaps he can still ask his father to help him cross into the afterlife#After all#Charles hates being dead
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just look how much BRIGHTER Mob’s demeanor is once he has Ritsu safe with him. that is the biggest grin ive ever seen on that boy’s face he loves his little brother so damn much it’s incomprehensible
#ignore gayass teru photobombing back there#but honestly really the amoubt of love Mob has for his brother makes my heart swell#as an older brother i related so hard to every moment he had where he was like ‘of course ritsu. im your older brother.’#being willing to do just about anything for your younger siblings comes with the job of being an older one#and mob psycho encapsulates that wonderfully#i need to analyze and make a post about their brotherhood i think. its just. really really sweet#it touches on so many interesting moments and dynamics#my favorite brothers. paces in circles while gripping and ungripping my fist repeatedly#the scene in the alley where Mob is bowing and apologizing to the gangster. because Ritsu is his little brother. his responsibility#and— more importantly one of the most important people in the entire universe to him.#i would give anything to watch that scene for the first time again#also if im being honest. i think Ritsu may be the most important person to Mob like ever. in a personal sense at least#thats his baby brother forever you know?#sorry got much too into that. haha#mob psycho 100#mp100#shigeo kageyama#mob
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Honestly I see Jimmy's refusal to put Curly out of his misery less about his weird feelings of envy or his delusions but the fact Curly is all but stated to be a shield to Jimmy from his actions and people seeing the worst in him.
The only characters that Jimmy really interacts with one on one before the crash are Curly and Anya, two individuals he has wildly different relationships with. It's likely that Curly really did most of the talking between them as the pilots and the rest of the crew as staff. They didn't know of Jimmy's more reprehensible behaviors cause they never really had the chance to and Jimmy is subconsciously aware. If they had disliked him more than Anya would have told Swansea earlier or even Daisuke when things got really bad.
It's why he takes the immediate opportunity to blame Curly; He's the shield. He's saved Jimmy's ass more times than he can count and more times than Jimmy would ever admit. Even when he can't really do it anymore, he mentally shields himself from his own faults by putting Curly between them. Letting Curly die puts too much on him because he doesn't know how to function without a safety net.
In the end Curly only lives because Jimmy needs the idea that Curly will inevitably make things better to stay alive, meaning Curly has to live, no matter how much it pains him to do so.
#in short Jimmy doesnt only care about Curly#he only cares about the securtiy that Curly provides him#and i headcanon that the reason he tried to kill everyone is because he knew it was only a matter of time befor Curly realized this wasnt#somethgin benign Jimmy did that he could smooth over but somethign that Curly would repremand and condem him for and take his security away#like yes Curly did not react fast enough or strongly enough to what Anya told him but you could see him showing more concern over it as I d#understand the psychology behind people and more specifically men like Curly as he is hearing something horrible his friend did to someone#he cares about but has less of a bond with. he feels the need to protect his crew as people first and sadly Jimmy is still the person he wa#closest too yet I still think everything happened too fast for Curly to process as would you not grapple with the fact your closest friend#is a monster you must personally deal with? or that he did something so vile to someone else you have become protective over? Would you not#think of the relative power that friend holds and how if you approuch this wrong it could end badly for everyone? He had all these thoughts#but not enough time to think about them. Also how Jimmy was one of the main people in his personal life he felt a need to protect seeing as#he got him this job. Like imagine the one person you are really trying to make good is still bad after everythign and now you have to be th#hand of judgment youve shielded them from for so long like I do not think Curly handeled the initial situation with Anya correctly I dont#think it was the case of him not believing but not really knowing what to do and feel about it as a friend of both parties the captain and#guy going through his own shit and it says so much that he was dealing with all that so well compared to Jimmy who got everyone killed cuz#he thought being captain would be like sitting on the thrown and not emotionally mentally and physically taxing like I cant say Curly is th#best person due to his inaction but he is a good person doing the best with the knowledge and shitty resources he has cuz like also Id just#be terrified that my suicidal and nilihst bestie who clearly has an inferiority complex around me is the copilot who has access to the most#to the most important parts of the ship and the means to kill us all if he feels like him or his security are being threatened like#Anya and Curly just deserved better because they get put through the ringer like just put him in a class to teach him to be less trusting#anya mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#captain curly#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#mouthwashing curly#mouthwashing anya#mouthwashing jimmy#jimmy mouthwashing#mouthwashing spoilers
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eowyn should have been a lesbian. Eowyn/faramir is like, fine, but it misses the point of eowyn for all baby dyke eowyn stans which is not that she longs for glory in battle and doesn't realize war is ugly and brutal, but that she's caught between two awful options and she doesn't want to be given one based on her gender. She's not in love with aragorn, she envies him because she finds the tasks he has in life more preferable and she hero worships him. Is this the point Tolkien was trying to make? Well, no,
#look it is LESS objectionable than other similar fantasy storylines because tolkien is making a point about the brutality of war#but i do think he correctly observes a particular impulse in some women without fully understanding the underlying tensions#he's like. for reasons unknown some women would prefer to face horrible dangerous circumstances than stay at home & tend the family castle#don't you see the castle is the important thing!#the castle is more important yes that's not the POINT#anyway. it will not be until many years later that some of those baby dykes will be able to articulate the vague feeling of betrayal#guy jobs are horrible and exploitative too on this we agree. but you see some of us will die if we have to figure out how to be nurturing
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Okay challenge mode. You are a therapist and Eridan Ampora from Homestuck has just walked right out of his intro page into your office. How do you fix him?
put him and karkat in a room with a pile of stuff and tell them they can't leave until they've jumped into it and talked about their feelings
#realtalk therapy doesnt work unless the person getting the therapy puts in the effort to make it work#eridan starts the comic in complete and utter denial that he's in need of help#so there's really nothing i nor any stranger could do about that#HOWEVER he does talk to karkat often about his feelings (and vice versa) and#the reason they didnt hang out during the game seems to be#1) they were on separate teams and didnt realize the teams were the same team until later on#2) by then it was too late and eridan had aggro'd all his angels#3) gamzee was deliberately keeping eridan away from karkat and vice versa (likely bc gamzee had a palecrush on kk)#4) karkat was too busy falling victim to his own insecurities abt being a leader to pay attention to his actual friendships#4a) eg. it shouldve been the time player doing the frog hunt with kanaya & not the blood player#like im not saying moirallegiance with karkat would have fixed all of eridans problems but i am saying#what eridan really needed was a friend who took his problems seriously and could see past his bullshitting#and karkat already WAS that friend - they just never hung out#so by the time the meteor rolls around eridan has spent WEEKS feeling abandoned anxious and alone on his death planet#and karkat has gotten used to not thinking about eridan too much#so karkat - who is basically eridans only actual friend at that point - isnt able to get through to him & eridan snaps#like the thing about sburb/homestuck is that it really stresses the importance of friendship and working together#letting each other help with each others' problems#thats why the smallest viable game is still two people by necessity#so when we see things like gamzee snapping or eridan snapping or vriska snapping#as much as these are the 'fault' of the person snapping they also need to be viewed as comprehensive team failures#the people who should have spent the game together didnt and the people who shouldnt have spent the game together did#vriska was allowed to bully tf outta tavros and nobody intervened#eridan was left all alone and nobody tried to help him#and everybody was mean to gamzee and nobody tried to connect with him#and you know whose job it is to make sure the right people are hanging out together? the blood player#and unfortunately our blood player was so insecure that he was doing jobs that werent his to do#im not saying pale erikar would fix homestuck but i am saying pale erikar is a symptom of things being fixed in homestuck
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So... I got a pen display and this is my first masterpiece on it 😌
#also i was inactive for a while because i was busy doing the important job of lying around and scrolling social media#but now i'm back with the tiniest and cutest of heroes#(also i'm devastated that we'll probably never see her again :( )#miraculous#miraculous ladybug#ml#ml fanart#marinette dupain cheng#multimouse#(and pls ignore the lack of earrings bc i just realized it and am too lazy to fix it :) )
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making hera manage a space station is inhumane. she's supposed to be creating unmarketable art. post-canon hera makes like fifteen dollars a month off niche experimental multimedia poetry zines, eiffel is begging people to listen to his music on bandcamp (between an assortment of jobs that would be perfectly fine, if he could hold any of them for longer than two months), and they are both so, so lucky minkowski cares about them so much.
#wolf 359#w359#hera wolf 359#doug eiffel#i've said things like this to friends before but it's important to me#hera is good at math by nature of her brain being. a computer that is wired up to other computers.#but none of that what she WANTS to do. jobs for which the only requirement is having no pulse. etc...#eiffel and hera are meant to be minkowski's slacker roommates#hera needs to make friends with musicians who are making equally niche and unmarketable stuff#and she recommends it to eiffel whose taste is way too normal#and she's like i told them about your music too!! and he's like oh... great... <- sweating because he knows how devastatingly uncool#all of these people think he is.#this would be good for her.
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full love and respect to teens but i’d give anything to filter by the author’s age on AO3 sometimes
#ao3#jay speaks#fanfiction#listen is this statement probably problematic — definitely#i wrote my best and most in depth works when i was 18-20#from my own experience i think younger people can sometimes have more time to dedicate to fic writing too#and their contributions are extremely important#but#do i now wish i could sometimes just toggle into only the fic written by people whove worked adult jobs — yes
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i miss them
#genshin impact#zhongchi#childe#tartaglia#zhongli#my art#ok im gonna make an actual conscious effort to post on tumblr more because its quite nice as an archive#my ipad exploded itself and i had to get a new one but i do a shit job at backing up data#and importing into procreat4 is a fucking pain in th4 ass#i had to download most of these off my twitter lmao but i spam too much on twitter to use it as a proper archive
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no but fucking really. "i'd love to get your thoughts. let me know if there's anything you disagree with--i won't take it out, but i'm more than happy to tell you where you're wrong ;)" versus "yeah. mm, yeah. yes; sorry, sorry. um. yeah. ......i just want you to like it. ...i'll leave you be." makes me. fucking. OUGH
trent, confident and playful, telling them he's happy to correct them if they disagree with anything he's written versus him anxiously awaiting ted's approval and actively seeking it out, nervous, eager in a sort of rattled anxious way. the confidence versus the hesitancy, the independence versus the want for ted to like it, like him.
and then ted giving him a word of praise and a word of criticism in one--that it's a good book but it shouldn't be called 'the lasso way'--and trent takes it. i honestly think he does disagree, but instead of "telling ted where he's wrong"--maybe just out of respect for what he wants, trust for his opinion--he changes the title. what he said he wouldn't do. for ted. what if i wailed and screamed
#trent crimm#tedependent#esp what i was just saying about trent being confident in his writing but not necessarily much else#and yet still. for ted. he questions that too. you know. ough#i'm not wording this perfectly im just screaming and banging my head on a wall and wailing#and like. conflating his ability his writing his skill the one thing hes good at with himself--#i just want you to like it could not more obviously be screaming a pleading sincere undertone of *i just want you to like me*--#it's also wanting ted to like trent's words. what trent has to say about *him* and what he's built here#wanting ted to understand not just how trent feels but what good ted's done in general#and how trent sees it (sees him) and how the world sees it (sees him) and how if they don't see it (see *him*) trent will *make them*#bc that's important. to trent and to ted#bc he knows it matters--or mattered‚ perhaps‚ with how distant he's been lately--to ted too#oh look. trent conflating himself/his value in his skill and his job. and ted doing the same#wails and wails and wails and w#gertspeak
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Otacon: You mean I'd only get in your way... (Feeling bitter about his helplessness)
Snake: Wrong. Only you can save those hostages. Got it?
Gripping Otacon by the shoulders, Snake reassures him. Smiling, Otacon nods his head.
#otasune#solid snake#otacon#hal emmerich#mgs2#mgs4#They make me. Insane.#mgs#metal gear solid#ada's screencaps#ada speaks#caption is from the script found in the document of metal gear solid 2#i NEEDED to compare these ok. it was making me fucking crazy#mgs2 spoilers#snake. giving otacon a Directive every time he notices him getting upset. because... that's how snake gets through life.#'that's your job right? to support me?' snake. i know you know what youre doing.#both times. he reassures otacon by affirming his importance to him#stresses that he cannot go on without his help and support#and it goes both ways#otacon gives snake purpose too#in the novel otacon says that snake has a 'tragic sense of responsibility' for raiden and meryl. but he suspects also extends to him#and it does#but despite everything... he chooses to carry this weight. he is directionless without a purpose#this is how snake keeps going#its why he took on responsibility for 50 huskies in alaska#its why he took it upon himself to make sure meryl got out of shadow moses alive 'for himself' and not for campbell#its why he joins otacon in atoning for their sins via philanthropy#and in these moments he reminds otacon that they have a job to do not because he is insensitive or uncaring#but because he himself functions this way. you can't change the past. but you can make a better future.
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Honestly I liked the silent hill 2 remake gameplay trailer and I think the game looks really good howEVER.... the decuntification of maria...............
#I can't get past it#WHY DID THEY DO THIS#don't make the clothing of the character that has a very important in-story reason to be sexy LESS sexy#where's the midriff??? the christina aguilera leopard print skirt??? and and also. her snappy remarks??????#where's the maria attitude????#istg if they changed maria's personality too I'm gonna spontaneously combust#I love maria so much she's my favorite character in sh2 and her voice actress did such an incredible and memorable job#it's gonna be hard for them to top that#I doubt any of the changes they make will make her “better” or a more interesting character#I'm just hoping it's not that many changes and I'm just getting a bad impression bc the game actually looks rlly good#and I'm kinda excited for it#but I'm *concerned* abt the character changes 🤨#sh2#sleep.txt
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