#and karkat has gotten used to not thinking about eridan too much
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davekat-sucks · 3 months ago
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You know, while I feel like Aranea (like many things in act 6) was wasted to varying degrees, I feel like the one Dancestor they (Hussie) didn't spurn was Meenah. We already had HIC so she didn't even need *too* much screen time/characterization and overall Meenah never overstayed her welcome as well as providing what I'd argue was actually valuable insight into HIC, as well as the Beforan trolls in general. Cronus... well I never liked Eridan much to begin with so maybe I'm biased but Cronus felt the most blatant (alongside Kankri and Porrim, though without any of the actual interesting stuff those characters could actually provide in regards to Beforus and their society, as well Group dynamics) in that he was the most clearly a parody of a part of the fanbase. Cronus sucks, and honestly, thats fine. not every character needs to be super complicated, especially given his meta-narrative purpose. that being said, Meulin and Kurloz both had a lot of potential (so did Nepeta.... not that hussie cares.) so I'm thankful that Befriendus has given poor Meulin a nice little spotlight and some wonderful characterization. All that to say, which Dancestors other than Aranea would you give more spotlight too and involvement in the story of act 6?
Going off of my previous post about how I'd approach giving Aranea and Jake a new lick of paint, I feel like I'd want to give more room for Meulin and Kurloz. Preferably more direct room for Meulin, but since Gamzee went off the deepend in his service to LE/Caliborn, Kurloz could fill in that gap to a degree that Gamzee left behind. Obviously taking inspiration from Befriendus here (She was so adorable in her route! X3) having Meulin serve as keen insight into the larger Beforan Troll group dynamics as a whole would give her more relevance to the plot overall, since.. Meenah was never a great source of insight. Not due to her lying but just because she's so self centered. We can also use Meulin to explore some of the ideas of "Not being appreciated." Since even though thats the entire reason Aranea slowly goes bonkers and jumps of the Vriska Train, she never really gets a good chance to really serve that roll of insight into that topic. Meulin on the other hand can serve that roll quite nicely. Not to say I'd want her to be a main character, but having her kind of slip into the Exposition role that Aranea left open for Beforan lore would leave as non-intrusive but still accessible. this could also give an opportunity to have her available at times without Kurloz influencing her mind, so we can see potential shifts in personality or w/e else, give more... non-verbal but visible expressions of Kurloz being abusive, or at least over protective, depending on how you want to go down that rabbit hole.
Given Terezi, Sollux, Kanaya (somewhat), and Karkat (also somewhat) are also all still (in theory) Major characters, we can probably leave their dancestors as is. If anything, we could use Cronus and a dead Eridan and maybe give his dead holier than thou ass some perspective, much like how Aranea now gives Vriska perspective. Eridan finally has a mirror to how so many other people see him, and maybe can be a bit less of a douchebag. maybe go try interacting with Lalonde for some SCIENCE (wizard) RP. (Ignore the fact I am pretty biased against Eridan, though it mostly went from indifference to solid dislike after her killed Feferi and Sollux. so I want him to actually have gotten the chance to possibly redeem himself.) Finally I think we *do* need to, as I remember someone here previously mentioning, giving a similar treatment for Horus and Equius. These are the Dancestors that just can't really improve as people. The clear examples as to why their team failed and they had to start over with a big old RESET. The worst of the bunch, of an admittedly pretty bad selection overall. Also Rufioh. Though instead of having Rufioh and Tavros sort of having this mirror example, I'd want them both to see visions of The Summoner. Rufioh of all the dancestors felt like he could, if he actually bothered to complete his Planets quest and fully self-actualize, could *become* the summoner, even without the Alternian Context that led him down that path. I mean Meenah does too, but thats not saying much. Honestly, maybe its just me, but I felt like we got... enough Tavros. His character arc was kind of complete by that point and he got some closure with Vriska even after he died, so I don't really think he specifically needs much so this is more so for Rufio's sake than anything else but it also wouldn't really need to take much "Screen Time". something like maybe 5-10 panels tops and then you can have him as a side or background character maybe with dialog in the flash games commenting or showing how its affected him. This probably wouldn't happen until after the big old RETCON after Aranea learns her lesson (Once again, the SYLPHs passive but important role comes into focus!) she can, by no means beyond being an example and cleaning up her own act after learning from that major fuckup in the previous timeline, maybe give (some) of her friends the push they need. even they continue to not appreciate her for it. Idk just more thoughts on the subject, and curious about yours.
This is all amazing. I agree on Dancestors not improving that it could be a good self-reflection or epiphany for the twelve trolls. I definitely could see Meulin giving a better exposition, if only in a slight exaggerated manner of telling it like an epic fanfic that's full of drama, action, romance, and more. Considering that Nepeta is the proto-Calliope, play up the theme that Meulin is part of the fandom side that gets so serious into it. If someone tries to speak ill about Kurloz, show Meulin herself get defensive on her own will. She is either oblivious or denying about her abuse. Kurloz either knowing this or taking advantage of it too can really interesting and messed up to explore.
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homestuck-iconz · 2 years ago
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John, Jade, I asked the dersites this question. Now it's your turn.
Thoughts on my favorite ships
Arasol (flushed)
Mitula (flushed)
Meowrails (pale, obviously)
Erifef (pitch)
Karezi (flushed)
Johnrezi (pitch)
Mod John here! Friendly reminder that if I seem rude about a ship, that's not the goal! I respect everyones ships (unless they are gross or illegal, duh) and I think most ships could be pretty cute!!
(ALSO I THOUGHT I POSTED THIS MY BAD)
Arasol <3 - 5/10
I used to be a strong Arasol shipper actually! I always thought they were super cute and I liked the thought of her dragging his ass out of his hive for ADVENTURE! Although I think Aradia is too... free. Shes a wildcard, a free fairy, she doesn't wait on anyone. I just think she needs someone who can better tie her down, or be able to keep up with her rather then be dragged along. How I enjoy this ship is very situational, I think it would work better flush then pale because of the nature of the two quads, but I mostly see them as close friends, or ex-lovers who just become really good friends
Mitula <3 - 9/10
These two are GOOFY AS HELL BRO!!! In my top ratings charts for sure! What more is there to say? Imagining she can let her guard down with him more easily then some others, they both get GOOFY with it! She handles any outbursts or breakdowns of his pretty well, and they are both just SUPER comfortable and protective of each other! (Latula more so then him, she did threaten Damara in Open Bound over Mituna afterall). 100% that couple who would tell the other they have a crush on someone else, and the other would be in full support like "YEAH!! GET IT BABE!!!" and are probably publicly affectionate because they are Too Cool to care. Overall love these two <3
Meowrails <> - 10/10
THE SILLIES EVER!! SOOOO SILLY GOOFY!!! A top ship 100%, I could dedicate entire posts on why they are SO good and yummy. I know I have in fact wrote entire paragraphs on them already after all (Mod Jade has gotten a taste of these rambles before.) To keep it simple though, they are the two autistic moirails who compliment each other and actually *see* each other for more then "Weird Sweaty Horse Boy" and "Weird Roleplaying Shipper Cat Girl". They help support each other, care about each other, and help the other grow in their own ways too. We were DEPRIVED of more amazing content of these two being pale.
Erifef <3< - 2/10
I think I can understand where this one comes from, but personally it isn't my cup of tea! Eridan might be grouchy sometimes and yeah he can get on Feferi's nerves, but I never really saw it more then Feferi sorta being like that? As well as I can't really see Eridan having too huge of pitch feelings for Feferi, that's like one of his childhood besties! Ex-moirails sure, but they used to be SUCH goofy friends! Just a low rating because I can't see it happening in really... any quadrant, but even LESS so in the pitch one. I think even if they ended up *disliking* each other, it would be hard for that to turn pitch, based on how Fef was already disinterested in being in a relationship with him. Also, I just don't think Eridan could really... be pitch for her. Again, silly goofy friends.
Karezi <3 - 5/10
I remember while reading Homestuck, I sorta liked this ship, but it never really piqued my interest very much. I think it could be silly and cute, mostly based off of their goofy interactions that they have had in canon. Karkat had a HUGE crush on her after all, and she liked him too. It was super fun in the comic, and I don't really hate it, but I don't really care for it either? It sorta lands middle ground for me. Personally I prefer them as just good ol friends! (With maybe some past romantic issues, like ex's or smthing along those lines)
Johnrezi <3< - 8/10
I LOVE Johnrezi, it was one of my big time ships for a while! These two pitch idiots WILL prank you and you will be pointed and laughed at. Although I could see Terezi taking it a bit too far and that frustrating John, which just adds to that pitch flavor. Brain isn't braining, but I think they bring out more of the chaos in each other and it is VERY fun to see.
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autumnblogs · 4 years ago
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Day 43: Openbound
We’ll principally be doing Act 6 Intermission 3 today, so expect lots of pictures in this one!
Believe it or not, I initially didn’t like Openbound very much; I felt like it kind of dragged on my first readthrough, and generally had a pretty hard time getting myself to care about the Dancestors. They’re a pretty unsympathetic bunch.
Then again, lots of Homestuck characters are pretty unsympathetic! I’ve been really feeling that in the second half, as retrospect allows me to view a lot of secondary characters through the lens that we’re not intended to get attached to them.
That said, Openbound is actually pretty key to helping us understand the second half of the comic, I think, and makes explicit a lot of the themes that it explores, and how it builds upon the first half.
I think that the theme of Openbound as a self-contained work within Homestuck that we can use as a tool to decode Homestuck can be concisely stated like this; “Nostalgia and a desire for unity with the past causes toxic stagnation.”
So, aside from the introduction that we’ve already gotten to Meenah through the short conversation she had with the other kids, this is our first real opportunity to get to know her! Boy is she obsessed with money.
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Money, like Cake, is a symbol that is associated with the Aspect of Life. As an aspect principally associated with Raw Power - the power to do what you want, unfettered by the stringent restrictions that are associated with Doom - it’s natural that Life would be associated with money.
The origin of money in history is pretty nebulous; it precedes the invention of writing, so any theory concerning its invention is ultimately conjecture. What I think is interesting about money is that the move toward a monetary economy in history mostly (but not always) happens as a result of the fact that it is way more efficient to collect taxes; the state mints standard coins, only accepts taxes in the form of standard coins, and propagates them into the economy by buying goods and services from the market.
It’s a tool of government, and even though Meenah may abrogate her inheritance, the Princess can’t escape her birthright. Money offers control, security... and power. What makes all of this extra interesting is that money is effectively worthless in the afterlife. Here, there’s actually nothing for her to really buy or spend it on; anyone can dream up whatever they want with ease.
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It’s a nice bit of callback humor that Meenah has the same reaction to discovering the Thorns of Oglogoth that Rose does, but unlike Rose, Meenah actually does destroy them on the spot.
For being so headstrong and dangerous, there are ways in which Meenah is really pretty surprisingly sensible.
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Lord English can destroy ghosts - this has always been a pretty disturbing thought for me. I may have said something to this effect before, but if I haven’t I’m a free-thinking Theist - raised in the Church, and largely independent in terms of beliefs, but I’m still pretty convinced that there is some kind of life after death. It doesn’t bother me nearly as much in works that have final death as a general presupposition, but it always bothers me when some kind of eternal life after death exists in a setting, and can be arbitrarily denied by evil beings with some power or another, like how some Demons and Liches can destroy or devour a soul in Dungeons and Dragons.
In Homestuck though, it fits with the themes established by the ways in which everyone God Tiers - spiritual power can be pretty arbitrary, and generally signifies very little about the moral worth of the one who has it; it does not intrinsically elevate the one who has it. It fits with its general criticism of power and the powerful, whether that’s the Mayor’s hatred of Kings, or the associating of corporatism with the worst parts of Jane’s characterization and Crockercorp in general.
Lord English has the power to destroy ghosts and end the lives of immortals not because he has attained to any kind of heightened spiritual awareness. He’s just some douchebag who through cosmic serendipity was in the right place at the right time to become basically all-powerful.
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I adore Meenah’s spark. Who gives a fuck if Lord English is invincible? She knows exactly what she’s going to do when she gets her hands on him, and she’s got a plan from the outset. I think it’s also interesting the way that even though Meenah is absolutely taken by the spectacle of power, it isn’t sufficient to make her want to join up with English. Only soft power works on Meenah Peixes; emotional intimacy, friendship... keeping her entertained. All of these are the actual way to moderate her violent and dangerous personality.
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While neither Rose nor Meenah is a parallel character to either Gendo or Rei from Neon Genesis Evangelion (I think, actually, that Dirk is the character who most strongly parallels both of them), this bit reminds me of the way that Ritsuko describes both of them;
Rose says of herself and Meenah, “You’re not very good at this, are you? ... talking to people.”
Ritsuko says of Gendo and Rei, “They’re not very adept (at)... living, I suppose.”
The same can really be said of a lot of characters in Homestuck, particularly the ones who primarily find their identity in some form of power-seeking. Whether it’s Rose, or Dirk, or Meenah, or even someone as innocuous as Jake, none of them is particularly adept at living.
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Rose is pretty conciliatory with Meenah; given her attraction to danger and darkness, it’s probably not surprising that she makes such an obvious pass at Meenah in spite of the fact that she probably knows what their relationship was in another life.
Further evidence that Rose is the horniest Homestuck character.
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“you know how it is with ancestors
they just kind of hold this inexplicable power over you”
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Dave continues to progress down the path of not giving a shit, as did Sollux before him.
He’s not quite to the level of reluctance that he eventually adopts, of choosing to just not engage with English at all.
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Gods are, to some extent, aware of the various narrative forces that govern their existence.
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About the only thing this piece of nasty trash has in common with Karkat is the extent to which they both blabber, and he helps create contrast with the other, somewhat more likable dancestors. Kankri is pretty much openly contemptible, and really in the worst way. I’m almost inclined to call him a concern troll because of the extent to which his verbal essays exist purely to make him feel better about himself. Any time it comes time for him to listen to people who historically actually suffered from the systems they were involved in, Kankri shows his true colors, slut-shaming and misogynistic.
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Unsurprisingly, The Other Thief is also the vector for English’s ideology in her session, “turning us against each other to make us stronger.” While Kurloz may be a worshipper of English, and Damara may have thrown in her lot with the demon because of her nihilistic despair, Meenah (rather like Dirk!) is clearly driven toward a life of violence, and restless action for its own sake.
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Now we’re starting to get some insight into Feferi’s style of rulership, which in turn, probably gives us some insight into Jane. For Feferi, leadership means taking power away from the people you’re leading if it seems like they have the potential to hurt themselves (or to be a drain on society if left to their own devices). It represents a violation of agency, perhaps not so severe as the kind that Vriska perpetrates usually.
Feferi and Jane are the sort of people, I think, who want to create a perfect world - but it’s important to them that they’re the one who’s creating that world, and less important that the world is perfect for anyone in particular. Just perfect.
https://homestuck.com/story/5288
John’s whole self-conception, and especially his conception of himself as a man, and someone who might be growing up to take on the same roles as his Father, is tied up in the icons of dadliness and masculinity in the movies that he likes.
So we should expect that his disillusionment with his past will change the way that he thinks about his future, and what he’s going to do with it. It’s a shame that this line of questioning never goes anywhere in Homestuck proper, but I’ll use it as evidence in the “John/June Egbert is trans” folder. Reminds me of how my decisive lack of affinity for the Boy Scouts serves as a nice little retrospective bit of evidence in my own trans narrative.
Based on the number of trans Eagle Scouts I know, I feel like there’s a certain extent to which it be like, a fast-track to figuring that out about yourself, like, you tried all the boy stuff and just decided, nope! Not for me.
https://homestuck.com/story/5290
Man, especially if we continue to read this section of Homestuck as conflating the characters and the audience, this whole section reads as John not just having a meltdown about Con Air, but also generally having a meltdown about his own story so far - everything he’s done in Sburb, etc. It just all feels lame and shitty in retrospect, when it was something that was kind of exciting at the time, at least up until the point where his loved ones all dropped dead there at the end.
It turns out that there was nothing particularly edifying about John’s suffering.
https://homestuck.com/story/5300
Teens can be such monsters. It’s the anniversary of Bro’s Death too. Davesprite is probably as broken up about that as John is about Dad, but it’s hard for boys/men to talk about that kind of thing with each other.
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Cronus is even more of an incel than Eridan. He may be the most singularly contemptible character in Paradox Space. Do I hate anyone more than Cronus? No, I think I do not.
I won’t have a lot to say about the middle leg of Openbound; it’s relatively empty of substance, and not much that happens in it is ever relevant again compared to the first and second legs.
I like to think that this leg of the journey is, more than anything, a chance to ruminate on some joke characters who were already parodies; parodies of parodies, a joke made at the expense of an existing joke. The kind of thing Dirk Strider would write, basically.
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Hey check it out, the Year of Our Lord 2012, and Andrew was starting to show some mild sensitivity in his choice of words. Just mild enough to have the lowest character in the story show a tiny bit of sensitivity himself.
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This leg of the adventure does give us some more insight into Meenah’s character. Just like Vriska, she’s all about being a hardass super-murder, until she starts causing problems for the people she actually cares about.
Being Evil Sucks.
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This is a really weird sentiment for Karkat to have in light of like, everything else about the latter half of the comic. I mean, he hasn’t exactly had the epiphany yet that the ideas that he has about being a leader are kind of awful and shitty, so it’s possible that he’s talking the Condesce up to avoid thinking about that. IDK.
He also immediately claims he’ll leave behind the meteor to go and join Meenah’s army, so maybe Karkat is just in a pretty low place in general? That tracks.
Karkat’s little conversation with Terezi explains at the two thirds mark of Openbound exactly what this whole thing is about.
Almost the entire second half of the comic is about examining the character’s guardians, and their relationships with them. The Guardians - Grandpa and Bro especially - are hyped up to be these outrageous badasses, both in-and-out of universe, and their ambivalent relationship with their kids creates this ambiguity throughout the comic about whether the kids are worthy, whether they’re living up to their parents’ legacy - and it’s the kind of thing that plagues them throughout.
But the thing is, Ancestors can be lame, or even terrible. They’re not really anything to aspire to, and the image of success that they project onto the world is one of learned confidence, and usually that only if they’ve really managed to make it.
Even the best parents are flawed, and instead of trying to measure up to them, growing up healthy usually means learning what those flaws are, and committing not to reproduce them.
Parents don’t suck; they can be awesome, and generally speaking, for a long part of our life, they’re all we’ve got. It’s hard not to love them. But we shouldn’t turn them into idols.
(On another note, it’s one hundred percent fitting for Terezi’s Ancestor to be an outrageous coolgirl. Terezi is perpetually anxious about being cool enough, the sort of person who is breathlessly fun to be around, who commands the attention of everyone around her, and she’s surrounded by them wherever she goes.)
https://homestuck.com/story/5340
John’s distress leads him to dream about his dead Dad, and boy is he angry. He spends a lot of the second half of the comic seething in rage directed at whomever is responsible for all the suffering he and his friends endure, dishing out beatdowns toward those responsible, but I’ve never gotten the impression that these little outbursts of his are particularly rewarding for him.
https://homestuck.com/story/5358
That was quite a blow. He knocked out like a tenth of Jack’s health bar.
https://homestuck.com/story/5387
Depending on where you’re standing some really totally different things can matter to different people. From Vriska’s point of view, the things that happened back when she was alive totally don’t matter at all anymore - only the matter of Cosmic importance that is fighting Lord English.
But the stuff that matters to the people she left behind, and the suffering she’s responsible for - especially for putting Terezi in a position where she had to slay her - all of that still matters very much to the people who are alive, which is what makes her self-conception as someone who is on the side of the angels now really... not sit well.
She clearly hasn’t changed all that much. She just thinks, as usual, that now that things are even, now that the score is settled, things can go back to the way they were before.
https://homestuck.com/story/5388
Tavros and Vriska are really bad for each other in general. Like, it’s not good for her to be around someone as pliable as Tavros is, and it’s plain to everybody that it’s not good for him to be around her either; whenever he’s around her, he apes her bogus inflated self-esteem in all the worst ways.
https://homestuck.com/story/5397
Tavros’ explanation of what Vriska does suggests that storytelling has become kind of a ritual for her - a means by which she is attempting to connect with her Ancestor, by performing the same actions she is, miming her - still the same old Vriska.
That’ll be all for now. Cam signing off for now - join me for the thrilling conclusion to Openbound tomorrow, Same Cam Time, Same Cam Channel.
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friendly-peep · 5 years ago
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Which Homestuck characters would read Homestuck and their opinion
idk i’m bored. What’s Homestuck^2? What’s epilogues? We’re strictly Homestuck in this house. Also only doing main characters, I’m not going to dive into the Felt or caparacians, I want this to be done today.
Beta kids:
June: Avid reader. Got in early and read the whole thing. Got shirts, unironically liked it.
Rose: Got in late, but got into it. Loved the tarot deck, uses it to pretend she’s reading while she just tells people their truths. Noticed some narrative issues but overall liked it.
Dave: Got in shortly after June did, read for a while, but his irony poisoning led to him sassing the HECK out of it. Made a diss blog. Kept reading it “ironically” and cannot tell if he actually likes it or not. Got a god tier hoodie he wears at home. Sampled some of the soundtracks for his raps.
Jade: Loved it. LOVED IT. Got the full soundtrack. Made remixes. Got all the shirts. One of the blogs that posted “UPD8!” whenever an update happened. Big fanartist during the Gigapauses.
Beta Guardians:
June’s Dad: Tried to get into it to connect to his daughter’s interest, but the memes were too much, so he became the “Are ya winning, daughter?” dad. Very supportive but would need fifty slow paced “Homestuck explained” videos.
Mom Lalonde: Read it, but was too intoxicated to remember most. She holds obscure knowledge and will remember minute trivia, but don’t ask her about any of the large plot points.
Bro Strider: Too busy being A Mess Of A Human Being to sit down and read.
Poppop Harley: Too busy being A Dang Explorer to sit down and read.
Alpha kids:
Jane: Takes time to read it slowly. Has a blog of theories she constantly updates. Was upset about how some plot points got dropped and underdeveloped.
Roxy: Much like Jade, loved it. While Jade made remixes, Roxy cosplays. She has killer cosplays of most characters. Screamed about updates on twitter. No filter, accidentally drops spoilers left right and center.
Dirk: Deep, DEEP character examinations. Draws diagrams, writes essays. Unironically liked the potential of Paradox Space, may have even submit his own stories to be a guest artist.
Jake: Read the whole thing, liked it, missed many connections and plot points, was satisfied with the ending. Got some merch, can say “I read Homestuck” in public and be blissfully unaware of any positive and negative baggage that comes with saying so.
Alpha Guardians:
Jane’s Dad: Much like June’s Dad, tried to get into it. Unlike June’s Dad, watched and read his daughter’s theories (and Dirk’s explanations when Jane linked them to him) and became A Walking Homestuck Encyclopedia. Jane is unsure how to feel about this. He, however, does not reference it.
Roxy’s Rosemom: Too busy fighting the good fight to read. It’s in her radar but didn’t get the time to read it.
Dirk’s Davedad: Read it as a novelty. Sent Hussie a gold-plated Bad Dragon dildo. Put offhand references to it on his movies, but they were so oblique that even readers didn’t get it.
Jade English: Too busy running her own baking good company to read Homestuck. Not even in her radar.
Alternia Trolls:
Aradia: Much like Dirk, got REAL DEEP into it. Makes youtube vids explaining classpects and narrative points. Actually wrote a dissertation on Homestuck.
Tavros: Tried to get into it, but the first few acts were not to his taste so he never got to the trolls ironically enough. Likes the character designs though.
Sollux: Next level Dave. Critiques the FUQUE out of it on every platform he can. If Hatedom is a thing, he made it. He’s the founder. It’s him. But he read it to the end.
Karkat: Read it, loves it, does some interesting character relationship examinations. Predicted who would end up with who with 100% accuracy. Wasn’t a vocal fan, didn’t get merch, but still liked it.
Nepeta: The shipper who launched a thousand ships. She writes crackfic but with deep care, making sure it makes sense that characters would end up together. Got one of every homestuck shirt. Very into it.
Kanaya: Got into it only because her friends got into it. If Karkat hadn’t talked about it she would not have gotten into it but she did because she wants to be able to carry a conversation with her friends. Not a huge fan.
Terezi: She can and WILL correct you if you get trivia wrong. She did not sit through hours of text-to-speech pesterlogs for some scrub to get it wrong. Defiant Homestuck defender. She’ll cut you if you say you don’t like Homestuck (she won’t, but she’s judging you from the other side of the room)
Vriska: Skipped the first acts and jumped right into Alternia. Little context, little care. Pretends she didn’t, gets facts hilariously wrong which Terezi takes as an invitation to tease her. Fanartist.
Equius: Another fanartist. He made physical media as opposed to drawings. Slow reader, got into it late and didn’t finish until way after the comic had ended. Did not get to experience the comic without Random Paradox Arms all over the place. Loved by the community for his short reaction posts about what happened at the point he’s at.
Gamzee: Either first person to post “Update” when comic updated, or doesn’t read for months and then catches up in two days. Skips many chat logs, but still gets most of the plot no problem. Remembers exact phrasing of the posts he does read though.
Eridan: Another Character Analysis blogger. He dives into (pun unintended) why some characters are The Absolute Worst and writes fanfic of how they would be if they had a chance to be in a different circumstances. The Problematique fan, but only because people assume the worst of him. He’s actually pretty chill.
Feferi: Superfan, and Super Content Creator. Started making plushies and charms and eventually started selling them. Her stuff became a badge of honor and people posted themselves hugging their plushies during the gigapause.
Ancestors:
Too busy caught up in their personal turmoils to read any of it. Except the Condesce. She sent Hussie a diamond-studded Bad Dragon dildo.
Beforus trolls:
Damara: Big fan, but doesn’t express it because of the crowd she’s with. But she has a blog where she tries to get in touch with new readers and is always open to answer questions others might have. Not a Big Name fan, but she’s much more vocal online than in person, and even then it’s through an alt account.
Rufioh: Got people into it, but he himself didn’t finish reading after the Scratch. Said he would but he just never got to doing so.
Mituna: Prone to ranting when updates happened. Very emotionally invested, nearly died when Game Over happened.
Kankri: The nitpicker to end all nitpicks. He critiqued everything, and hated that there were hero mode, simplified and silly drawings. Genuinely disliked all characters for faults that he himself has, yet never self-examined. Got a following that  consisted three-quarters of people who made fun of his rants and one-quarter of people who were as intense as he is.
Meulin: Big, BIG fan. Prolific fanfic writer, if a character pairing exists, rarepair or not, she wrote a fic about them. Likes all characters and as such thinks she must devote roughly the same wordcount for everyone she can. Disappears for months then reemerges with twenty new fics.
Porrim: Moderate fan, great cosplayer. The more complex the outfit, the more she wanted to make it. Routinely goes out in Jade’s Dead Shuffle and Three in the Morning dresses because she is incredibly proud of them.
Latula: Not a big fan. Knows most of what she knows through cultural osmosis because her friends got into it, but she’s not likely to ever read it herself. Likes how into it her friends are though.
Aranea: Much like Jane’s Dad, she’s the walking encyclopedia, except she memorized the content of almost every page, and if she doubts her knowledge, will immediately go to her computer and look up what she is unsure of. Tries not to talk people’s ears off and will only talk about Homestuck when asked about it.
Horuss: Super into it. To a maybe creepy degree. Doesn’t show in public but if you get access to his secret blogs it’s more like character shrines. Don’t dig too deep into it.
Kurloz: Read it, kinda into it, but not that big of a fan. He will talk about it but he’s pretty lukewarm about the whole thing.
Cronus: Read it to impress a crush, got genuinely into it, but isn’t a vocal fan.
Meenah: Didn’t read it, much like Latula learned about it because everyone around her talked about it. Unlike Latula, she mocks everyone for liking something she says is “for nerds”. Still kinda wants to read it to be part of the conversation but her pride of Not Knowing About Homestuck is too great to overcome that hurdle.
61 notes · View notes
riverboundao3ff · 5 years ago
Text
Riverbound, Chapter 1
Your name is MSPA READER, and you are currently vibing outside of the known multiverse.
Well, you don’t really use that name anymore, on account of it not actually being a name. Names sound something like Emily, or Muhammad, or Patrick, or Shamita, or a million other put-together syllables and sounds.
Names are something personal. A title is anything but.
You do have a new title, though, one you like much better.
The Guardian.
Because that’s what you became when you yoinked the timeline away from the control of Ultimate Dirk and that Director lady, whoever she was. You looked Canon-With-A-Capital-C in its ugly face, spit on it, and then bent over to wipe your ass with the fabric of reality itself. Out of desperation, love, and most importantly sheer spite, you took it upon yourself to defy fate so that there is at least one timeline where everybody gets to live happy lives. This was victory at its finest. This is what it felt like to finally get everything you wanted. Your friends? Safe. Multiverse? Secure. Hotel? Trivago.
In the vast and rich history of pro-gamer moves, you believe you might have made the most powerful move of all.
After using the Green Sun- no, sorry, the Green Sun to make your own timeline, you did what any other person would do and took a big fuckin’ snooze, curling up around your universe like a mama cat protecting her kittens. You earned it.
And, if you were being completely honest with yourself, that’s how you would have spent the rest of time.
It’s not like you didn’t want to live. No, living was good. It’s just… you were so damn tired. You’re tired of always running from place to place, person to person, era to era. You’re tired of being injured, scared, and alone no matter how many friends you made. All the gods of the Furthest Rings know you’d gone through more in like a year than most people go through during their entire lives. Couldn’t a bitch just enjoy eternity in the void?
Apparently not.
The dreams began innocently enough. Playing video games with Dave, John, and Karkat. Exploring Jade’s island with Jake and Bec. Baking with Jane. Kanaya teaching you and Sollux how to sew. FLARP-ing with Vriska.
Laying side-by-side with Roxy as you two watched the sun rise. Role-playing with Nepeta. Movie night with Eridan. Getting high off your ass with Gamzee and scaring the shit out of some teal visiting their kismesis a few hives away. Discussing politics with Feferi.
Escaping that hellhouse the Soleil twins called their home. Watching those eerie lights in the corpsefield beside Fozzer. You and Remele beating a purpleblood to death.
You barely realize how nightmares had invaded your mind until you woke up with Karako’s yowls of terror in your ears. You didn’t have ears anymore, though, or a physical form, so it just sounded like your favorite clown son was screaming all around you in the abyss.
Okay. This was fine. This was fine, you kept telling yourself. After everything that’s happened to you, you were bound to develop PTSD at some point. That was completely natural.
Except this wasn’t just PTSD. This was something else entirely, because even when you were awake you saw the faces of your oldest friends burning in your mind’s eye. Something churned in your gut, ancient and primal. It was a feeling you knew well, and was usually accompanied by you launching yourself into whatever stupid shit you found next. The longer you tried to ignore it, the stronger it became, until you were permanently wrapped up around yourself like the most pathetic ball of Guardian that had to have ever existed.
You knew long before you actually put words to what was going on.
Of course. Of course it wasn’t over, because why would you ever get to have anything for yourself? Why would you ever get to just rest? For the first time in… who even knows how long, you sob hysterically into the sleeves of your hoodie.
A galaxy twinkles in the outer shell of your universe, lighting up the zig-zag sign on your chest. Mallek’s lazy smile fills your thoughts. If at all possible, everything hurts even more, until you can’t even cry to let out the pain.
Did he miss you? Did all of them miss you?
Oh, God, Daraya. You promised her you’d take her to Earth sometime, and then you just totally fucking vanished from the face of Alternia. What a fucking dick move. Granted, you hadn’t meant to do it, but still!
Your traitor-asshole brain reminds you of the fact that all of them are dead now. As in, Tyzias tried to lead a rebellion against the Alternian Empire, and then they all got killed. Your traitor-asshole brain also notes that it’s all your fault for encouraging those kinds of ideas.
Way to go, you absolute tool.
Except… they don’t have to be gone. You are the Guardian of your universe, and you make the rules. It feels so wrong to even think about it, but… yeah. You’re basically a god now. You can do what you want and nobody has the power to stop you.
Which brings about a whole new plethora of fuckery. If you were to go back, if you were to rewrite history… are you any better than Ultimate Dirk? Granted, you’d do it out of love, not because you’re a power-hungry bastard, but still. Shenanigans of this level are not to be taken lightly, even by sad Guardians with absolutely nothing better to do.
You sleep on it, which of course results in you waking up bawling like a baby as you remember the best roleplay sesh of your life, which was when Wanshi proudly gave your Soldier Purrbeasts OC her full name: Twinklemoon. You had a Soldier Purrbeasts OC named Twinklemoon. That’s why you were crying.
That’s it. You couldn’t stand it anymore.
You need advice, and you know exactly where to get it.
<>
You find her on the 8rigantine, furiously scribbling something down on a chart with a bunch of little figurines in the middle of it. You know better than to just haul your little friendslut ass up there while Vriska Serket is in the zone, so instead you knock on the hull and call up to her.
“Hello! Lady Spinneret, an old friend is in dire need of some advice!”
It takes about two seconds for a familiar spiky head to poke over the side of the deck. Vriska’s one dark eye lights up upon meeting your gaze, followed by a toothy grin that’s both menacing and completely genuine. She reaches back to grab something behind her. A rope ladder drops down and nearly nails you in the noggin, just like it did whenever you dropped by to FLARP with her.
“What the hell, bitch! I missed you!” she yells. Despite everything, you can’t help but smile. Vriska’s wild personality and no-bullshit attitude was just what you needed.
You’re very proud of yourself when you scale the ladder with ease and scramble up onto the deck without getting too much out of breath. With the amount of insane shit you’ve gotten yourself into during your travels, getting into shape came pretty easily. You’ve been told by several reliable sources that your legs are to die for.
“The 8-ball foretold your arrival. I brought snacks.” Vriska points to a bag next to her chart, not looking up from where she was drawing an impressively detailed kraken-looking thing. “Eat something before you start gabbing.”
That was sound logic, so you drag the back closer to you and start rooting around for something good. You find a bag of stinkroot chips, open that bad boy up, and start munching. Damn, did it feel good to eat something, and to also have a corporeal body to eat things with.
As you gather your thoughts, the hairs on the back of your neck prickle with the sensation of somebody’s eyes on you. You instantly look up to see Vriska staring at you. Her expression is blank, but her good eye held all the energy of a thunderstorm.
You swallow your chips. “What is it?”
“You look… different,” she says, setting down her pencil. “It’s like I can really see you now.”
“Huh?”
Vriska huffs, but she still doesn’t take her eye off you. “Before, you kinda looked like… I dunno, like somebody cut out a whole in reality and shoved the silhouette of a person inside? Like, I know what you looked like, but I couldn’t tell you the color of your hair, or what facial structure you have, or, like… dude, you have freckles.”
“I have freckles?” You reach up and touch your cheekbone, feeling the soft skin. Oh, hey, there’s some acne. Dammit. “Are they cute?”
“Sure? I think freckles are more of a human thing, so you’d have to ask John or Jade or whatever. Also you’re blonde, like Rose,” she tells you, thoughtfully scratching at her chin. “You’re still short as fuck, though. I could probably punt you off the poop deck.”
“Thanks.”
“You’re welcome. Congrats on not looking like a hole in reality.”
You finish off your chips and flop back to stare at the night sky. With all the time you’ve spent on Alternia, you can now name a lot of the constellations. Right now, the Empress’s Trident poked up at a forty-five degree angle behind the pink moon. “I think I know how we can overthrow the Alternian Empire.”
Vriska’s pencil falls out of her hand.
You continue. “Have you read any records on a rebellion that occurred about… like, fifteen sweeps ago? I don’t know the exact date.”
Vriska’s mouth opens and closes a couple of times, and then she nods. “I sure fuckin’ did. Sollux did some of his mumbo-jumbo and got me some documents. He called it an early wriggling day present, but I know he wants to help my little… agenda. How do you even know…?”
“Because I helped encourage the right people to do it. I was there, Vriska. Those kids were my friends, and now they’re dead.”
She’s silent for a moment. “The leader was a teal named Tyzias.”
Your eyes are hot with tears. “I knew her. We met because she tripped on the sidewalk while carrying a shitload of her homework, and I helped her pick it all up when it went everywhere. She had a matesprit named-”
“Stelsa,” Vriska mutters. “Holy shit. She worked closely with some jades who lead their little army. They caused a hell of a lot of damage to the Empire before it all went down, I’ll give them that.”
Neither of you speak for a long moment, which you appreciate as you try and hold your messy self together. The longer you think about your old friends and all the good times you had with them, the more you’re certain about what you want to do.
They deserve to be here.
Your blood pressure spikes just thinking about it.
It’s Vriska who puts your thoughts into words. “You want to go back and help them win the rebellion.”
“Yeah.”
“That’s fucking crazy.”
“Yeah.”
She scooches over to you so she can stare down into your soul. “If we combine our resources and collaborate back and forth between the past and the future, we can make it so less people die. We could even take out that pathetic bitch of an Heiress they had back in the day. With your powers…”
“It’s possible I could compact time itself to create a world where we… where we can make things right. We could even help Feferi…”
You can’t bring yourself to say it in case you jinxed something, but by the look on Vriska’s face, she knows what you mean.
“It could work,” she breathes.
Slowly, you sit back up. Your heart was pounding so hard you felt it in your skull. “How do you think the others would feel about it?”
“Oh, they’d shit themselves,” Vriska snorts. “A full-scale rebellion across time and space?”
“True.”
“But it could work!” she repeats, staring into empty space.
“And they’d have a huge advantage they never had before. Me,” you say, talking to yourself more than to Vriska. You’d created this universe with your own power. It was time to protect it. “Vriska, I need to go before I chicken out. Tell the others what’s happening and that I’m sorry if this all goes to shit.”
“Wait!”
You look back at her as she grabs your arm, claws digging into the fabric of your hoodie. “I… you need supplies. No frickin’ way you’re going anywhere without at least a hydration flask.”
You know what she’s trying to say, and your chest fills up with all the warmth of a bonfire. God, you love this absolute bitch of a kid.
Vriska drags you to your feet, and then you’re both sprinting for her hive.
Amazingly, you don’t die trying to keep up with the cerulean as you charge up the stairs to her respiteblock together. You’re still out of breath by the time you reach the top, though, but Vriska’s already grabbing a backpack and tossing shit into it.
“Get me that jacket off the door,” she orders as she tosses in what looks like a small medical kit. You obey and throw her the jacket, the black leather one with the bright red hood.
She then waves you over, and you slip around her desk to see what’s up. In her hands is a black sheath, with a matching handle sticking out at the top.
Vriska pulls the sheath off to reveal the blade: a brilliant silver-blue metal that nearly glowed in the darkness. It’s incredibly beautiful and very scary to look at.
“I’ve had this thing forever, so I’m giving it to you, okay? Don’t fucking lose it. Press that little gray button at the top of the handle to heat up the blade. Good for starting fires and cauterizing wounds.” She shoves the jacket into the backpack and hands you the dagger.
“Vriska, I don’t know what to say,” you begin, but she smacks you.
“Shut up and strap it to your belt. You better come back soon. I want a detailed report on everything. Single-spaced,” she snaps.
You grin. “Yes, ma’am. I should be back, in like, ten nights. Maybe eleven.”
“Ten,” Vriska growls. “I’m coming for your ass otherwise.”
“Noted. Tell everybody I said hi.”
“Obviously.”
You reach into that little part of yourself, which in turn reaches back out into that chaotic river that is the flow of time. You throw the anchor down and wade upstream. It’s a little rougher than usual, but you won’t let that stop you. There was no turning back now.
Time travel is always like trying to hit a moving target, but you have great aim, and when you find what you’re looking for you feel your face split into another huge smile. There’s nothing different about this part of the river than any other, but you know. When it comes to the people you care about, you always know.
Everything feels more real to you than it has in years. Two moons shine even brighter in the sky, the chilly air stinging your face, and you’re no troll but it still feels like you’re going home.
You open your eyes.
“Ten nights,” you say to Vriska, and you let yourself fall through the current.
Your name is MSPA READER, and you are currently vibing outside of the known multiverse.
Well, you don’t really use that name anymore, on account of it not actually being a name. Names sound something like Emily, or Muhammad, or Patrick, or Shamita, or a million other put-together syllables and sounds.
Names are something personal. A title is anything but.
You do have a new title, though, one you like much better.
The Guardian.
Because that’s what you became when you yoinked the timeline away from the control of Ultimate Dirk and that Director lady, whoever she was. You looked Canon-With-A-Capital-C in its ugly face, spit on it, and then bent over to wipe your ass with the fabric of reality itself. Out of desperation, love, and most importantly sheer spite, you took it upon yourself to defy fate so that there is at least one timeline where everybody gets to live happy lives. This was victory at its finest. This is what it felt like to finally get everything you wanted. Your friends? Safe. Multiverse? Secure. Hotel? Trivago.
In the vast and rich history of pro-gamer moves, you believe you might have made the most powerful move of all.
After using the Green Sun- no, sorry, the Green Sun to make your own timeline, you did what any other person would do and took a big fuckin’ snooze, curling up around your universe like a mama cat protecting her kittens. You earned it.
And, if you were being completely honest with yourself, that’s how you would have spent the rest of time.
It’s not like you didn’t want to live. No, living was good. It’s just… you were so damn tired. You’re tired of always running from place to place, person to person, era to era. You’re tired of being injured, scared, and alone no matter how many friends you made. All the gods of the Furthest Rings know you’d gone through more in like a year than most people go through during their entire lives. Couldn’t a bitch just enjoy eternity in the void?
Apparently not.
The dreams began innocently enough. Playing video games with Dave, John, and Karkat. Exploring Jade’s island with Jake and Bec. Baking with Jane. Kanaya teaching you and Sollux how to sew. FLARP-ing with Vriska.
Laying side-by-side with Roxy as you two watched the sun rise. Role-playing with Nepeta. Movie night with Eridan. Getting high off your ass with Gamzee and scaring the shit out of some teal visiting their kismesis a few hives away. Discussing politics with Feferi.
Escaping that hellhouse the Soleil twins called their home. Watching those eerie lights in the corpsefield beside Fozzer. You and Remele beating a purpleblood to death.
You barely realize how nightmares had invaded your mind until you woke up with Karako’s yowls of terror in your ears. You didn’t have ears anymore, though, or a physical form, so it just sounded like your favorite clown son was screaming all around you in the abyss.
Okay. This was fine. This was fine, you kept telling yourself. After everything that’s happened to you, you were bound to develop PTSD at some point. That was completely natural.
Except this wasn’t just PTSD. This was something else entirely, because even when you were awake you saw the faces of your oldest friends burning in your mind’s eye. Something churned in your gut, ancient and primal. It was a feeling you knew well, and was usually accompanied by you launching yourself into whatever stupid shit you found next. The longer you tried to ignore it, the stronger it became, until you were permanently wrapped up around yourself like the most pathetic ball of Guardian that had to have ever existed.
You knew long before you actually put words to what was going on.
Of course. Of course it wasn’t over, because why would you ever get to have anything for yourself? Why would you ever get to just rest? For the first time in… who even knows how long, you sob hysterically into the sleeves of your hoodie.
A galaxy twinkles in the outer shell of your universe, lighting up the zig-zag sign on your chest. Mallek’s lazy smile fills your thoughts. If at all possible, everything hurts even more, until you can’t even cry to let out the pain.
Did he miss you? Did all of them miss you?
Oh, God, Daraya. You promised her you’d take her to Earth sometime, and then you just totally fucking vanished from the face of Alternia. What a fucking dick move. Granted, you hadn’t meant to do it, but still!
Your traitor-asshole brain reminds you of the fact that all of them are dead now. As in, Tyzias tried to lead a rebellion against the Alternian Empire, and then they all got killed. Your traitor-asshole brain also notes that it’s all your fault for encouraging those kinds of ideas.
Way to go, you absolute tool.
Except… they don’t have to be gone. You are the Guardian of your universe, and you make the rules. It feels so wrong to even think about it, but… yeah. You’re basically a god now. You can do what you want and nobody has the power to stop you.
Which brings about a whole new plethora of fuckery. If you were to go back, if you were to rewrite history… are you any better than Ultimate Dirk? Granted, you’d do it out of love, not because you’re a power-hungry bastard, but still. Shenanigans of this level are not to be taken lightly, even by sad Guardians with absolutely nothing better to do.
You sleep on it, which of course results in you waking up bawling like a baby as you remember the best roleplay sesh of your life, which was when Wanshi proudly gave your Soldier Purrbeasts OC her full name: Twinklemoon. You had a Soldier Purrbeasts OC named Twinklemoon. That’s why you were crying.
That’s it. You couldn’t stand it anymore.
You need advice, and you know exactly where to get it.
<>
You find her on the 8rigantine, furiously scribbling something down on a chart with a bunch of little figurines in the middle of it. You know better than to just haul your little friendslut ass up there while Vriska Serket is in the zone, so instead you knock on the hull and call up to her.
“Hello! Lady Spinneret, an old friend is in dire need of some advice!”
It takes about two seconds for a familiar spiky head to poke over the side of the deck. Vriska’s one dark eye lights up upon meeting your gaze, followed by a toothy grin that’s both menacing and completely genuine. She reaches back to grab something behind her. A rope ladder drops down and nearly nails you in the noggin, just like it did whenever you dropped by to FLARP with her.
“What the hell, bitch! I missed you!” she yells. Despite everything, you can’t help but smile. Vriska’s wild personality and no-bullshit attitude was just what you needed.
You’re very proud of yourself when you scale the ladder with ease and scramble up onto the deck without getting too much out of breath. With the amount of insane shit you’ve gotten yourself into during your travels, getting into shape came pretty easily. You’ve been told by several reliable sources that your legs are to die for.
“The 8-ball foretold your arrival. I brought snacks.” Vriska points to a bag next to her chart, not looking up from where she was drawing an impressively detailed kraken-looking thing. “Eat something before you start gabbing.”
That was sound logic, so you drag the back closer to you and start rooting around for something good. You find a bag of stinkroot chips, open that bad boy up, and start munching. Damn, did it feel good to eat something, and to also have a corporeal body to eat things with.
As you gather your thoughts, the hairs on the back of your neck prickle with the sensation of somebody’s eyes on you. You instantly look up to see Vriska staring at you. Her expression is blank, but her good eye held all the energy of a thunderstorm.
You swallow your chips. “What is it?”
“You look… different,” she says, setting down her pencil. “It’s like I can really see you now.”
“Huh?”
Vriska huffs, but she still doesn’t take her eye off you. “Before, you kinda looked like… I dunno, like somebody cut out a whole in reality and shoved the silhouette of a person inside? Like, I know what you looked like, but I couldn’t tell you the color of your hair, or what facial structure you have, or, like… dude, you have freckles.”
“I have freckles?” You reach up and touch your cheekbone, feeling the soft skin. Oh, hey, there’s some acne. Dammit. “Are they cute?”
“Sure? I think freckles are more of a human thing, so you’d have to ask John or Jade or whatever. Also you’re blonde, like Rose,” she tells you, thoughtfully scratching at her chin. “You’re still short as fuck, though. I could probably punt you off the poop deck.”
“Thanks.”
“You’re welcome. Congrats on not looking like a hole in reality.”
You finish off your chips and flop back to stare at the night sky. With all the time you’ve spent on Alternia, you can now name a lot of the constellations. Right now, the Empress’s Trident poked up at a forty-five degree angle behind the pink moon. “I think I know how we can overthrow the Alternian Empire.”
Vriska’s pencil falls out of her hand.
You continue. “Have you read any records on a rebellion that occurred about… like, fifteen sweeps ago? I don’t know the exact date.”
Vriska’s mouth opens and closes a couple of times, and then she nods. “I sure fuckin’ did. Sollux did some of his mumbo-jumbo and got me some documents. He called it an early wriggling day present, but I know he wants to help my little… agenda. How do you even know…?”
“Because I helped encourage the right people to do it. I was there, Vriska. Those kids were my friends, and now they’re dead.”
She’s silent for a moment. “The leader was a teal named Tyzias.”
Your eyes are hot with tears. “I knew her. We met because she tripped on the sidewalk while carrying a shitload of her homework, and I helped her pick it all up when it went everywhere. She had a matesprit named-”
“Stelsa,” Vriska mutters. “Holy shit. She worked closely with some jades who lead their little army. They caused a hell of a lot of damage to the Empire before it all went down, I’ll give them that.”
Neither of you speak for a long moment, which you appreciate as you try and hold your messy self together. The longer you think about your old friends and all the good times you had with them, the more you’re certain about what you want to do.
They deserve to be here.
Your blood pressure spikes just thinking about it.
It’s Vriska who puts your thoughts into words. “You want to go back and help them win the rebellion.”
“Yeah.”
“That’s fucking crazy.”
“Yeah.”
She scooches over to you so she can stare down into your soul. “If we combine our resources and collaborate back and forth between the past and the future, we can make it so less people die. We could even take out that pathetic bitch of an Heiress they had back in the day. With your powers…”
“It’s possible I could compact time itself to create a world where we… where we can make things right. We could even help Feferi…”
You can’t bring yourself to say it in case you jinxed something, but by the look on Vriska’s face, she knows what you mean.
“It could work,” she breathes.
Slowly, you sit back up. Your heart was pounding so hard you felt it in your skull. “How do you think the others would feel about it?”
“Oh, they’d shit themselves,” Vriska snorts. “A full-scale rebellion across time and space?”
“True.”
“But it could work!” she repeats, staring into empty space.
“And they’d have a huge advantage they never had before. Me,” you say, talking to yourself more than to Vriska. You’d created this universe with your own power. It was time to protect it. “Vriska, I need to go before I chicken out. Tell the others what’s happening and that I’m sorry if this all goes to shit.”
“Wait!”
You look back at her as she grabs your arm, claws digging into the fabric of your hoodie. “I… you need supplies. No frickin’ way you’re going anywhere without at least a hydration flask.”
You know what she’s trying to say, and your chest fills up with all the warmth of a bonfire. God, you love this absolute bitch of a kid.
Vriska drags you to your feet, and then you’re both sprinting for her hive.
Amazingly, you don’t die trying to keep up with the cerulean as you charge up the stairs to her respiteblock together. You’re still out of breath by the time you reach the top, though, but Vriska’s already grabbing a backpack and tossing shit into it.
“Get me that jacket off the door,” she orders as she tosses in what looks like a small medical kit. You obey and throw her the jacket, the black leather one with the bright red hood.
She then waves you over, and you slip around her desk to see what’s up. In her hands is a black sheath, with a matching handle sticking out at the top.
Vriska pulls the sheath off to reveal the blade: a brilliant silver-blue metal that nearly glowed in the darkness. It’s incredibly beautiful and very scary to look at.
“I’ve had this thing forever, so I’m giving it to you, okay? Don’t fucking lose it. Press that little gray button at the top of the handle to heat up the blade. Good for starting fires and cauterizing wounds.” She shoves the jacket into the backpack and hands you the dagger.
“Vriska, I don’t know what to say,” you begin, but she smacks you.
“Shut up and strap it to your belt. You better come back soon. I want a detailed report on everything. Single-spaced,” she snaps.
You grin. “Yes, ma’am. I should be back, in like, ten nights. Maybe eleven.”
“Ten,” Vriska growls. “I’m coming for your ass otherwise.”
“Noted. Tell everybody I said hi.”
“Obviously.”
You reach into that little part of yourself, which in turn reaches back out into that chaotic river that is the flow of time. You throw the anchor down and wade upstream. It’s a little rougher than usual, but you won’t let that stop you. There was no turning back now.
Time travel is always like trying to hit a moving target, but you have great aim, and when you find what you’re looking for you feel your face split into another huge smile. There’s nothing different about this part of the river than any other, but you know. When it comes to the people you care about, you always know.
Everything feels more real to you than it has in years. Two moons shine even brighter in the sky, the chilly air stinging your face, and you’re no troll but it still feels like you’re going home.
You open your eyes.
“Ten nights,” you say to Vriska, and you let yourself fall through the current.
Your name is MSPA READER, and you are currently vibing outside of the known multiverse.
Well, you don’t really use that name anymore, on account of it not actually being a name. Names sound something like Emily, or Muhammad, or Patrick, or Shamita, or a million other put-together syllables and sounds.
Names are something personal. A title is anything but.
You do have a new title, though, one you like much better.
The Guardian.
Because that’s what you became when you yoinked the timeline away from the control of Ultimate Dirk and that Director lady, whoever she was. You looked Canon-With-A-Capital-C in its ugly face, spit on it, and then bent over to wipe your ass with the fabric of reality itself. Out of desperation, love, and most importantly sheer spite, you took it upon yourself to defy fate so that there is at least one timeline where everybody gets to live happy lives. This was victory at its finest. This is what it felt like to finally get everything you wanted. Your friends? Safe. Multiverse? Secure. Hotel? Trivago.
In the vast and rich history of pro-gamer moves, you believe you might have made the most powerful move of all.
After using the Green Sun- no, sorry, the Green Sun to make your own timeline, you did what any other person would do and took a big fuckin’ snooze, curling up around your universe like a mama cat protecting her kittens. You earned it.
And, if you were being completely honest with yourself, that’s how you would have spent the rest of time.
It’s not like you didn’t want to live. No, living was good. It’s just… you were so damn tired. You’re tired of always running from place to place, person to person, era to era. You’re tired of being injured, scared, and alone no matter how many friends you made. All the gods of the Furthest Rings know you’d gone through more in like a year than most people go through during their entire lives. Couldn’t a bitch just enjoy eternity in the void?
Apparently not.
The dreams began innocently enough. Playing video games with Dave, John, and Karkat. Exploring Jade’s island with Jake and Bec. Baking with Jane. Kanaya teaching you and Sollux how to sew. FLARP-ing with Vriska.
Laying side-by-side with Roxy as you two watched the sun rise. Role-playing with Nepeta. Movie night with Eridan. Getting high off your ass with Gamzee and scaring the shit out of some teal visiting their kismesis a few hives away. Discussing politics with Feferi.
Escaping that hellhouse the Soleil twins called their home. Watching those eerie lights in the corpsefield beside Fozzer. You and Remele beating a purpleblood to death.
You barely realize how nightmares had invaded your mind until you woke up with Karako’s yowls of terror in your ears. You didn’t have ears anymore, though, or a physical form, so it just sounded like your favorite clown son was screaming all around you in the abyss.
Okay. This was fine. This was fine, you kept telling yourself. After everything that’s happened to you, you were bound to develop PTSD at some point. That was completely natural.
Except this wasn’t just PTSD. This was something else entirely, because even when you were awake you saw the faces of your oldest friends burning in your mind’s eye. Something churned in your gut, ancient and primal. It was a feeling you knew well, and was usually accompanied by you launching yourself into whatever stupid shit you found next. The longer you tried to ignore it, the stronger it became, until you were permanently wrapped up around yourself like the most pathetic ball of Guardian that had to have ever existed.
You knew long before you actually put words to what was going on.
Of course. Of course it wasn’t over, because why would you ever get to have anything for yourself? Why would you ever get to just rest? For the first time in… who even knows how long, you sob hysterically into the sleeves of your hoodie.
A galaxy twinkles in the outer shell of your universe, lighting up the zig-zag sign on your chest. Mallek’s lazy smile fills your thoughts. If at all possible, everything hurts even more, until you can’t even cry to let out the pain.
Did he miss you? Did all of them miss you?
Oh, God, Daraya. You promised her you’d take her to Earth sometime, and then you just totally fucking vanished from the face of Alternia. What a fucking dick move. Granted, you hadn’t meant to do it, but still!
Your traitor-asshole brain reminds you of the fact that all of them are dead now. As in, Tyzias tried to lead a rebellion against the Alternian Empire, and then they all got killed. Your traitor-asshole brain also notes that it’s all your fault for encouraging those kinds of ideas.
Way to go, you absolute tool.
Except… they don’t have to be gone. You are the Guardian of your universe, and you make the rules. It feels so wrong to even think about it, but… yeah. You’re basically a god now. You can do what you want and nobody has the power to stop you.
Which brings about a whole new plethora of fuckery. If you were to go back, if you were to rewrite history… are you any better than Ultimate Dirk? Granted, you’d do it out of love, not because you’re a power-hungry bastard, but still. Shenanigans of this level are not to be taken lightly, even by sad Guardians with absolutely nothing better to do.
You sleep on it, which of course results in you waking up bawling like a baby as you remember the best roleplay sesh of your life, which was when Wanshi proudly gave your Soldier Purrbeasts OC her full name: Twinklemoon. You had a Soldier Purrbeasts OC named Twinklemoon. That’s why you were crying.
That’s it. You couldn’t stand it anymore.
You need advice, and you know exactly where to get it.
<>
You find her on the 8rigantine, furiously scribbling something down on a chart with a bunch of little figurines in the middle of it. You know better than to just haul your little friendslut ass up there while Vriska Serket is in the zone, so instead you knock on the hull and call up to her.
“Hello! Lady Spinneret, an old friend is in dire need of some advice!”
It takes about two seconds for a familiar spiky head to poke over the side of the deck. Vriska’s one dark eye lights up upon meeting your gaze, followed by a toothy grin that’s both menacing and completely genuine. She reaches back to grab something behind her. A rope ladder drops down and nearly nails you in the noggin, just like it did whenever you dropped by to FLARP with her.
“What the hell, bitch! I missed you!” she yells. Despite everything, you can’t help but smile. Vriska’s wild personality and no-bullshit attitude was just what you needed.
You’re very proud of yourself when you scale the ladder with ease and scramble up onto the deck without getting too much out of breath. With the amount of insane shit you’ve gotten yourself into during your travels, getting into shape came pretty easily. You’ve been told by several reliable sources that your legs are to die for.
“The 8-ball foretold your arrival. I brought snacks.” Vriska points to a bag next to her chart, not looking up from where she was drawing an impressively detailed kraken-looking thing. “Eat something before you start gabbing.”
That was sound logic, so you drag the back closer to you and start rooting around for something good. You find a bag of stinkroot chips, open that bad boy up, and start munching. Damn, did it feel good to eat something, and to also have a corporeal body to eat things with.
As you gather your thoughts, the hairs on the back of your neck prickle with the sensation of somebody’s eyes on you. You instantly look up to see Vriska staring at you. Her expression is blank, but her good eye held all the energy of a thunderstorm.
You swallow your chips. “What is it?”
“You look… different,” she says, setting down her pencil. “It’s like I can really see you now.”
“Huh?”
Vriska huffs, but she still doesn’t take her eye off you. “Before, you kinda looked like… I dunno, like somebody cut out a whole in reality and shoved the silhouette of a person inside? Like, I know what you looked like, but I couldn’t tell you the color of your hair, or what facial structure you have, or, like… dude, you have freckles.”
“I have freckles?” You reach up and touch your cheekbone, feeling the soft skin. Oh, hey, there’s some acne. Dammit. “Are they cute?”
“Sure? I think freckles are more of a human thing, so you’d have to ask John or Jade or whatever. Also you’re blonde, like Rose,” she tells you, thoughtfully scratching at her chin. “You’re still short as fuck, though. I could probably punt you off the poop deck.”
“Thanks.”
“You’re welcome. Congrats on not looking like a hole in reality.”
You finish off your chips and flop back to stare at the night sky. With all the time you’ve spent on Alternia, you can now name a lot of the constellations. Right now, the Empress’s Trident poked up at a forty-five degree angle behind the pink moon. “I think I know how we can overthrow the Alternian Empire.”
Vriska’s pencil falls out of her hand.
You continue. “Have you read any records on a rebellion that occurred about… like, fifteen sweeps ago? I don’t know the exact date.”
Vriska’s mouth opens and closes a couple of times, and then she nods. “I sure fuckin’ did. Sollux did some of his mumbo-jumbo and got me some documents. He called it an early wriggling day present, but I know he wants to help my little… agenda. How do you even know…?”
“Because I helped encourage the right people to do it. I was there, Vriska. Those kids were my friends, and now they’re dead.”
She’s silent for a moment. “The leader was a teal named Tyzias.”
Your eyes are hot with tears. “I knew her. We met because she tripped on the sidewalk while carrying a shitload of her homework, and I helped her pick it all up when it went everywhere. She had a matesprit named-”
“Stelsa,” Vriska mutters. “Holy shit. She worked closely with some jades who lead their little army. They caused a hell of a lot of damage to the Empire before it all went down, I’ll give them that.”
Neither of you speak for a long moment, which you appreciate as you try and hold your messy self together. The longer you think about your old friends and all the good times you had with them, the more you’re certain about what you want to do.
They deserve to be here.
Your blood pressure spikes just thinking about it.
It’s Vriska who puts your thoughts into words. “You want to go back and help them win the rebellion.”
“Yeah.”
“That’s fucking crazy.”
“Yeah.”
She scooches over to you so she can stare down into your soul. “If we combine our resources and collaborate back and forth between the past and the future, we can make it so less people die. We could even take out that pathetic bitch of an Heiress they had back in the day. With your powers…”
“It’s possible I could compact time itself to create a world where we… where we can make things right. We could even help Feferi…”
You can’t bring yourself to say it in case you jinxed something, but by the look on Vriska’s face, she knows what you mean.
“It could work,” she breathes.
Slowly, you sit back up. Your heart was pounding so hard you felt it in your skull. “How do you think the others would feel about it?”
“Oh, they’d shit themselves,” Vriska snorts. “A full-scale rebellion across time and space?”
“True.”
“But it could work!” she repeats, staring into empty space.
“And they’d have a huge advantage they never had before. Me,” you say, talking to yourself more than to Vriska. You’d created this universe with your own power. It was time to protect it. “Vriska, I need to go before I chicken out. Tell the others what’s happening and that I’m sorry if this all goes to shit.”
“Wait!”
You look back at her as she grabs your arm, claws digging into the fabric of your hoodie. “I… you need supplies. No frickin’ way you’re going anywhere without at least a hydration flask.”
You know what she’s trying to say, and your chest fills up with all the warmth of a bonfire. God, you love this absolute bitch of a kid.
Vriska drags you to your feet, and then you’re both sprinting for her hive.
Amazingly, you don’t die trying to keep up with the cerulean as you charge up the stairs to her respiteblock together. You’re still out of breath by the time you reach the top, though, but Vriska’s already grabbing a backpack and tossing shit into it.
“Get me that jacket off the door,” she orders as she tosses in what looks like a small medical kit. You obey and throw her the jacket, the black leather one with the bright red hood.
She then waves you over, and you slip around her desk to see what’s up. In her hands is a black sheath, with a matching handle sticking out at the top.
Vriska pulls the sheath off to reveal the blade: a brilliant silver-blue metal that nearly glowed in the darkness. It’s incredibly beautiful and very scary to look at.
“I’ve had this thing forever, so I’m giving it to you, okay? Don’t fucking lose it. Press that little gray button at the top of the handle to heat up the blade. Good for starting fires and cauterizing wounds.” She shoves the jacket into the backpack and hands you the dagger.
“Vriska, I don’t know what to say,” you begin, but she smacks you.
“Shut up and strap it to your belt. You better come back soon. I want a detailed report on everything. Single-spaced,” she snaps.
You grin. “Yes, ma’am. I should be back, in like, ten nights. Maybe eleven.”
“Ten,” Vriska growls. “I’m coming for your ass otherwise.”
“Noted. Tell everybody I said hi.”
“Obviously.”
You reach into that little part of yourself, which in turn reaches back out into that chaotic river that is the flow of time. You throw the anchor down and wade upstream. It’s a little rougher than usual, but you won’t let that stop you. There was no turning back now.
Time travel is always like trying to hit a moving target, but you have great aim, and when you find what you’re looking for you feel your face split into another huge smile. There’s nothing different about this part of the river than any other, but you know. When it comes to the people you care about, you always know.
Everything feels more real to you than it has in years. Two moons shine even brighter in the sky, the chilly air stinging your face, and you’re no troll but it still feels like you’re going home.
You open your eyes.
“Ten nights,” you say to Vriska, and you let yourself fall through the current.
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heystuckstuck · 6 years ago
Text
doll parts part one
eridan ampora x reader
part one ==> HERE
part two ==> coming soon!!! <3
YOU ==> WAKE UP
You do. You are sprawled out on your own bed, which is soft, softer than anything you’ve slept on in awhile. You are lying on your stomach, your arms crooked under your pillow to support your head. This is the way you almost always sleep. Your phone dings to the left side of your head, and you blearily shift to your side to check it. It would appear that someone is trying to get ahold of you.
cuttlefishCuller [CC] began trollling chumHandle [CH]
CC: )(-Ey t)(-Er-E, Y/N!
CC: )(ow ar-E you f-E-Eling today?
CH: im feeling fairly pleasant atm
CH: just woke up
CH: you?
CC: I’m FINTASTIC!!!
CC: )(-E-E )(-E-E
CH: cute
CH: glad to see youre still doing the fish pun thing
CH: why exactly do you do it?
CC: I lik-E fish
CC: SO!!!
CH: :?
CC: ar-E you coming to my party tonight?
CC: I r-E-Elly hope so!
CH: shore
CH: ;)
CC: Aww )(-E-E )( -E-E!
CC: You us-Ed a fish pun
CC: )(ow glubbing cut-E!
CH: thank you, fef
CC: And don’t fr-Et!
CC: W-E’ll have som-Ebody watch out for you!
CC: So what )(app-En-Ed last tim-E won’t )(app-En again!
CH: …
CC: I’m sorry!
CC: I shouldn’t )(av-E brought it up
CC: 38(
CH: no, that’s ok
CH: it happened
CH: it’s okay to talk about it
CC: )(ow was it?
CH: how was what?
CC: T)(-E )(ospital?
CH: it was ok
CH: im totally better
CC: I’m sure as s)(-Ell glad to )(-Ear it!
CC: Sollux and the cr-Ew will b-E t)(-Er-E to pick you up
CH: the crew?
CC: I’m not shor-E who it’ll b-E but Sollux is driving a bunch of our fri-Ends ov-Er
CC: I asked )(im to pick you up too!
CC: 38)
CH: thanks feferi
CH: youre the best
CC: I c-Ertainly try
CC: T)(-Er-E’s no way to wink at you wit)( my -Emoticon
CC: So just picture t)(at in your )(-Ead
CH: ;)
chumHandle [CH] ceased trolling cuttlefishCuller [CC]
twinArmageddons [TA] began trolling chumHandle [CH]
TA: y/n
CH: sollux
TA: thii2 ii2 gonna be a really weiird que2tiion
TA: plea2e don’t get mad
TA: but
TA: would you fuck ed
CH: what why
TA: becau2e seniior year is almo2t here and iif he doe2nt lo2e hii2 viirgiiniity before hii2 biirthday ii can’t be hii2 friiend anymore
CH: what makes you so sure he’s a virgin
TA: y/n
CH: fair point
TA: ii ju2t know that you have 2ome pretty lax 2tandard2
CH: are you calling me a “2lut”
CH: is that what’s happening right now
TA: god no
TA: ii ju2t wanna get the ba2tard laiid
CH: fine, i’ll do it
TA: y/n you are a 2aiint
TA: 2eriiou2ly
TA: nobody el2e would touch that ugly fucker with a ten foot pole
CH: you and i both know that eridan isn’t ugly
CH: he’s actually quite handsome
TA: god gro22
TA: ju2t thank you
TA: you’re doiing u2 all a favor really
TA: ed fuck2 you and then he’ll 2hut hiis fuckiing iidiiot mouth about not fuckiing anythiing
CH: how many times are you gonna say fuck
TA: fuck
CH: that’s fair
CH: yeah i’ll do it
TA: cool
TA: fiinger gun2
TA: ii’ll piick you up at 6
twinArmageddons [TA] ceased trolling chumHandle [CH]
Sollux is there for you promptly at six o’clock. You’re standing on the curb, waiting for him, when his familiarly tiny rusty red car pulls up alongside you. The music is so loud you can hear it through the closed doors and when you glance in the passenger’s side window, Aradia gestures her thumb back behind her. She must’ve called shotgun, or maybe Sollux got her first. You open the door to the backseat and clamber inside.
Karkat is on the far end, smushed into the door. He looks as disagreeable as always but he offers you a softer-than-usual smile as he adjusts his traditional black t-shirt. Eridan, in between the two of you, looks far more uncomfortable. You notice the way he is desperately trying not to look at you and in retaliation, you put a soft hand on his thigh. He looks as though he might faint, cheeks flushed and forehead beaded with sweat. He doesn’t say anything to you, but Karkat does.
“Alright, Y/N?”
Yes. Why wouldn’t you be?
“Yes, why wouldn’t I be?”
Karkat shrugs although from the hunch of his shoulders, you can tell he wants to argue. Everyone knows that he’s lying. You know he’s lying. You know why everybody wants to know if you’re alright. And frankly, it’s nobody’s fucking business.
Not even if they stroked your hair and whispered soft little nothings to you all the way to the emergency room. Not even then.
As you walk into the party, you notice a tall, slim figure posed at the front of the grand entrance hall. He’s smoking a cigarette and he has sunglasses on indoors. Dave Strider. He greets your friends casually but when he gets to you he falters and peers at you over the top of his shades.
“All better, Y/N?”
“Yes, I’m totally better. I eat almonds and yogurt and soup.” He nods curtly, but you can see the tension in his face. It would be difficult to miss, as difficult to miss as those reddish brown eyes of his. You remember the last time you saw them.
You were lying on your back with the left side of your face caked in vomit. Your limbs were seizing up and you wanted to scream but it was like your voice was invisible. Dave knelt over you, eyes as wide as saucers as he begged you to stay awake, please stay awake, oh god, what did you do, why did you do this, god no, please no, no no no no no nonononononononononono.
And you put your hand on his face and said, “Hello David.” Or tried to. You’re sure that what came out was a flubbed version.
“What did you take?” He’s begging you please tell him, tell him so he can get you to the hospital and they can pump your stomach, god please.
“13 valiums and a bottle of gin.” You try to tell him that you were just trying to float and stop your misery and stop the not eating and stop stop stop stop stop. But he can’t hear you. He screams out a feeble and watery Karkat and then you’re in a car with Karkat petting you and his mouth was moving but all you could hear were sirens. You wanted to sleep more than anything but Karkat kept shoving you awake and talking to you and telling you stories and begging you don’t go to sleep, no.
So you suppose if anyone has the right to ask you if you’re okay, it’s Dave, and you’d better tell him too. So you do, but you can tell that he doesn’t fully believe you, but to your relief, he leaves it.
The music is loud. It makes your ears numb. You see Feferi but you don’t go and say hi because she’s kissing Sollux on his mouth and tracing her fingers up his arm and you know you shouldn’t interrupt, so you don’t and push your way further through Feferi’s house. The lights are all pink and blue and hazy and you can’t see through the smoke in the air and you can taste the acrid tang of cigarettes in the back of your mouth, which makes it feel like cotton. You stumble and trip over something-someone lying on a beanbag on the floor, who doesn’t try to catch you when you fall into his bony chest.
“Well hey there, little sis, how’s it motherfuckin’ hangin’?” It’s Gamzee, with his dark, splotchy face and lazy looking eyes and dopey grin. He doesn’t help you up, the idea doesn’t even seem to occur to him. His eyes are bloodshot and his left hand’s slender fingers grip a short, lit blunt, which he offers to you.
“You want a hit?” Nobody except him in your friend group smokes pot. They drink and snort crushed up pills but they don’t smoke weed. You’ve tried it before, but only a few times. You didn’t like how it stung your throat and made you cough.
“Nah, that stuff makes you hungry.” That was your least favorite thing about it. The last time you smoked pot, you’d woken up naked on John’s couch with your hands and chest smeared in food goop and no memory of how it got there. You didn’t need that again. Gamzee doesn’t seem to mind, and just takes another drag.
“It’s no problem sis, more for me.” You watch him as he puffs on it again, noting the way the slight orange glow offsets the neon lights in the room.
“Anyway, chica, long time no see. How’s it been?” You shrug and Gamzee laughs.
“That’s so motherfuckin’ righteous, sister. Seriously, be all up and motherfuckin’ careful. Don’t want anything bad happening to you or anything.” You’re dumbstruck by the fact that Gamzee of all people, slow-witted, slow-reacting, oblivious, with a brain half-ruined y marijuana knows. God, how does Gamzee know?
“I saw you, all up and covered in that puke. Shit, y’know, it fuckin’ scared me. I love you and I don’t want you to die or anything. You were shaking and crying and everyone was all just sitting there, not knowing what to up and do. It was the opposite of a miracle. But maybe the fact that you’re not dead is a miracle and whatever god exists kept you alive for us. I’m motherfuckin’ happy about that. I’d miss you if you were dead. I think everybody would, even if they pretend they wouldn’t.”
Gamzee then punctuates his profound statement with a soft belch and he gives you a watery, peaceful smile, close-lipped, with his eyes shut. You return the smile, though yours is more strained than his because god just stop fucking talking about it.You get it. You don’t really want to be dead anymore but you wish everyone would stop reminding you of it. You want to forget as much as anybody else. You never wanted everyone to see you, shaking on the floor, eyes rolled up into the back of your head with foam oozing from between your lips all over your white tanktop, staining it pink. You want to forget. You want to forget Feferi screaming and and Sollux saying, hush, hush, FF, it’s okay, and Dave’s tears dribbling onto your face and getting into your mouth. They were salty on your numb tongue.
Gamzee’s hand begins to snake down the front of his sweatpants and you decide to leave before this gets awkward. You abandon Gamzee and trip on your way to the stairs, which you clamber up, on your way to Feferi’s second story bathroom. You don’t have to go, you just want to inspect Feferi’s mom’s medicine cabinet, see if she’s gotten anything new since the last time you were here, before. Before. Before you took John’s grandmother’s pills out of the kitchen and fell on the floor and Feferi screamed and Dave cried and Karkat crooned in your ear and you felt more loved than you ever had before, which was bullshit because of course everyone loves you when you try to die.
She doesn’t have anything new, you note with mild disappointment, pocketing some old pills that haven’t been touched since the last time you were here. You read the label before hiding them. Oxytocin. Pain pills. You shove it, along with your hands into your oversized maroon jacket, and just in time too, because the door you were certain you locked opens to your right. You turn and meet an abashed-looking Tavros, his face alcohol and embarrassment-flushed.
“Oh, I didn’t realize that anybody would be in here. I just needed to, um, well, yeah, you know.” He stumbles over his words and looks flustered, so you smile at him.
“Oh, that’s alright, I was just leaving.” You grab a tiny white paper cup, designed for mouthwash and fill it with water before exiting the bathroom, brushing past Tavros’s shoulder. He closes the door and you pull out the pills and take two with the shot of water you have. You aren’t addicted to popping pills, but it is an outstanding interest of yours. You wait a few minutes and then you feel fuzzy and it’s a bit like you’re walking on the ceiling as you trample down the hallway. You walk back down the stairs on watery legs, trying admirably not to fall on your face, which you don’t.
You walk to the kitchen, where Vriska is leaning with her back and elbows resting against the counter. Terezi and John are with her and you notice them eye you suspiciously as you open up all of the cabinets and count the cans inside.
“Hungry?” John asks, voice shaking a little bit. You remember seeing him, driving the car, speeding down the freeway, pedal to the metal. He kept frantically glancing back at you, blue eyes enormous, even more so than usual. Hs too-large front teeth were worrying his bottom lip and his knuckles were white as he gripped the steering wheel. You know why his voice is shaking. You’re starting to get tired of this.
“No.”
“What’re you doing then?”
“Counting.”
“Okay,” he says, sounding uneasy. God, why can’t people just stop being fucking worried about you? Why does John have to quirk his perfectly arched and adorable eyebrows at you like that? Why does he have to bite his lip and why does goddamn Vriska of all people look worried about you? You know perfectly well the reason why, but you don’t care. You don’t care that they all saw you. That everyone knows. You couldn’t care less.
You exist through the backdoor in the kitchen because you need some air, jesus. You can’t stand the way they all look at you, with such pity and fear. It was a mistake and you’ll never live it down because you scared everybody shitless. You take a deep breath of untainted air and somebody sighs right after you exhale. What the hell?
“What the hell?” You glance around and huddled at your feet is Eridan, his floral short-sleeve button down too tight in the arms. He’s wearing slacks too, which is such an Eridan thing to do and you are filled with an overwhelming surge of affection toward your friend. This is all he is, your friend. Your friend that might fuck you later, according to Sollux.
You flop down next to him. He doesn’t react, just takes a long sip from his red plastic cup. It’s probably beer, which you’re sure upsets his sensitive palette but he’s actively not complaining in dramatic, emotional theatrics for once so you don’t question it.
“Hey.”
“Hey.”
“What’re you doing out here, ‘Dan?”
“Everywhere else was full.” It’s true. All of your friends are rambunctiously partying in every corner of Feferi’s party. Except the bedrooms, you suppose. But maybe Feferi and Sollux have already made their way there, you know they will eventually and Feferi will call you tomorrow and tell you all about it. You know every detail of her sex life. She knows every detail of yours and while you are always supportive, sometimes she frowns at you and shakes her head.
“Ah.”
You’re both silent for awhile, the only sounds being of your breath and Eridan sipping his beer solemnly and yet, delicately. Feferi has a trampoline in her backyard and you haven’t jumped around and just had fun in god knows how long so you get up and offer your hand to Eridan. He accepts, although with a cocked eyebrow, and his hand still firmly in yours, you guide him to the trampoline.
“Really, Y/N? You wanna play on the goddamn trampoline? That’s fairly, just, it’s juvenile, don’t you think?”
“Yes, absolutely.” And you take off your shoes and fling your body onto the black netting and bounce a few times. Eridan hesitantly follows you.
“What if someone sees us?”
“Let them. We’re young and you’re drunk and I want to fly,” you say, leaping into the air and coming down with a spring. Eridan doesn’t jump at first, not until you grab his sleeve and tug on it and oh, Danny, I’m having so much fun, I’m flying, this is like the fucking Notebook, I’m a fucking bird, tell me I’m a bird like the Notebook. You’re laughing hysterically at yourself and Eridan is fucking giggling at you and then he starts jumping too and you dance in circles with only the soundtrack of summer cicadas to keep a melody. You grab his hands and his fingers twine with yours and suddenly he’s falling and you’re bouncing your back against the trampoline, narrowly avoiding hitting your head as Eridan lands on top of you and bounces off but only after squishing the life out of you.
You’re laughing so hard no sound is coming out and you’re gasping and so is he and you grab his hand from where he’s laying beside you.
You look up at the stars. You haven’t seen the stars in over six weeks. You missed them.
“So, how are you, Y/N? I’m sure sorry that I couldn’t come an’ visit you.” You do the best shrug you can while lying down.
“Nobody was allowed to visit me, except in the ER.”
“Still, I should’ve come. Fef went. John went.”
“They’re the only ones that did.”
“Really?” His voice is incredulous.
“Everyone texted. Until I had to go to the psych ward. Then I wasn’t allowed texts anymore.”
“Yeah, I know.”
You don’t want to be sad anymore so you change the subject.
“Eridan?”
“Hm?”
“Are you going to fuck me later?” He chokes, a loud spluttering cough, and jerks up to lay on his arm, staring down at you.
“What?!”
“Sollux told me that you were going to.”
“God, oh fuck, he told me-he-he said-he told me you didn’t know!”
“I know.”
“Well, I know that now!”
“It’s okay. If you want to, I’m okay with it.”
“Okay with what?”
“You fucking me.”
His face flared red, which was a feat in and of itself because his skin was soft brown. He looked beautiful in the starlight: his eyes, a gorgeous golden-hazel with long, dark lashes, his nose sturdy and strong, his lips fairly thick and soft and most especially the freckle he had, on the left corner of his bottom lip. His hair fell in his face, dark brown and highlighted by a thick bleached streak in the front. He wasn’t just pretty, not just beautiful, he was gorgeous. You wouldn’t mind snagging his virginity. Not one bit.
“I don’t think-I mean-well-I-I-I want to but I just think that maybe we should wait on that.”
“Okay,” you say, staring into his eyes, fighting down a pang of disappointment, “But if Sollux asks, you can say you did.”
His eyes narrow a bit and then he’s nervously looking at anything but you.
“But I wanted to know. Could you, maybe-I don’t-just-kiss me?” You smile, a full grin with teeth showing an everything.
“Yes, Eridan.”
And then you get up to your knees and pull him up to meet you and your lips are together and his lips are soft, a bit firmer than you imagined, and they’re clumsy and he accidentally clips your teeth together. You wrap an arm over his shoulder and he puts his hands at your small waist, pressing on your hips with his fingertips. You reach your other hand down and take his. You guide it over your breast and his whole body stiffens. His fingers begin to itch around and grope at the soft flesh under his hand and you slip your lips down to his neck. He makes a noise that is a cross between a purr and a croon and you push him down beneath you. The two of you break apart and he stares up at you, fingers touching his swollen bottom lip like he can’t believe what just happened. You realize suddenly that you just bagged his first kiss. You gently kiss his cheek and roll off of his abdomen.
When you wake up in the morning, you’re inside on the couch with Eridan spooned up behind you. A shirtless Equius lays across the floor with Nepeta’s head on his belly. Terezi’s legs are sprawled across her chest. Everyone else is still asleep but you can feel Eridan start to stir behind you. He nuzzles into the crook of your neck and mumbles a quiet good morning into the skin.
“Morning.”
“Mm.”
“Eridan?”
“Hm?”
“Your stiffy’s digging into my back.”
“M’sorry.”
“S’okay.”
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snowtimeisbesttime · 6 years ago
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Thoughts and questions on Volume 10, routes 1 and 2! ...finally.
-Back in Homestuck both Feferi and Eridan got the short end of the stick screentime-wise, but here, they both got a nice bunch of much-needed Interesting Stuff! It's a shame we're (almost surely) heading back to Earth now, to befriend the heck out of the alpha kids.
~ROUTE 2~
-MC expected the Heiress to be super awful, and then Feferi has literally 2 good endings (whose achievements seem to be reversed route-wise?) and her bad ending you get by actively choosing not to further interact with her. And of course, she's already very much against the Empire, even if she doesn't quite seem to interact with it...
-Maybe I read too many fanfics where all of the beta trolls rebel, but I'm kinda surprised that The Rebellion's still a Vriska & Terezi only thing. Let's hope we get to see if Fef does join up...
-Looks like the whole “Witches living in the middle of nowhere with their extremely powerful guardians” thing is starting to become a trend, huh? In Feferi's specific case her meteor probably fell right in front of Gl'bgolyb (a pretty damn large area, actually), who would’ve then immediately gone “holy shit a sky baby” and adopted her.
-Considering that the Condesce can just come down to Alternia and personally get rid of the Heiress (singular, explicitly), living so far from everything was probably a blessing in disguise. And maybe also NOT being involved with how the planet's run- though we'd have to ask a certain Trizza Hiveswap about that...
-She was planning on waiting thousands of sweeps before challenging the Condesce, though iirc the whole thing with Heiresses challenging HIC was something demanded by their shared lusus... She didn't really bother with future ruling plans in Homestuck because they were going to play SGRUB; though Glubglub also bonded more strongly with Feferi because HIC was too far from Alternia... enough to actively favor her over the Empress?
-We also get even more confirmation that seadwellers are OP: Feferi blows up a huge air bubble (that stays on the ocean floor) for MC not to drown like it's nothing, and she's very likely even stronger than Equius*. Meanwhile, Eridan gets thrown through a party cannon (that was just there on the airship for reasons i guess??) AND has Daraya's mall thrown at him by Sollux, and practically walks it off, though he does say later that it was close. You know who'd be a Great Additional Data Point??? Cridea Jeevik.......
-*However, they would not fight, as they both stan Nepeta. On a more serious note, having Feferi interact on-screen with the other trolls would've been very nice... she's hanging out with Sollux in Eridan's route but We Don't See It... We know she's friends with Kanaya, and she also had a pretty nice interaction with Vriska back on one of the walkaround flashes too,
-On seadwellers in general- neck gills are canon (though if i remember correctly a Very Old Tumblr Post, that'd actually not be the best place to have gills? Idk tho), as we can see in Feferi's route; and then we have Eridan, who we know has spent very little time underwater in his entire life, with his scarf *and* a high neck shirt. (this might just be me but. wouldn't it be super uncomfortable to have clothing touching one's gills??? i guess it would kinda depend on the specific take on gills, biology wise)
-Feferi owns a ~fancy air-producing conch shell~, so that's that for any fan seadwellers that Need to have landdwelling friends over.
-MC theorizes that there might be something that makes adult empresses evil... something external, such as a powerful curse of some sort... which would have to transfer from dead empress to freshly crowned empress somehow... really makes you think...
-Feferi can use one of Glubglub's eyes (?) as a crystal ball from which she can access the Actual Dark Motherfucking Carnival, and get metaphysical advice from there. And the one giving her said advice is our precious clown son Karako, who may or may not have gotten like 10 degrees on weird meta shit since we last saw him- assuming he's the same bapy as last time...
-According to Karako or whomstever is speaking through him, there's a creator above this world's creator, as well as another creator above him, and another one above her, and so on and so forth maybe? Wonder what's this setting up for........
-Feferi can either meditate her way up through layers and layers of meta, so she might access them and interact with them, or choose to change stuff in the Alternia she knows and lives in, small as it may be; both these endings have a lot of potential for cool stuff that I hope we'll get to see. Depending on the choice, MC is either a cheese or a marshmallow.
-In Fef's bad end, MC wonders about the workings and limits of their plot armor; they do give it a good whirl in this entire volume.
-I am incredibly pleased to announce that the ally/eely pun also works in Spanish (aliado/anguilado)
~ROUTE 1~
-We find out that both Vriska and Feferi have dumped Eridan- the first's likely busy being gay and doing revolutions with Terezi, but what happened (besides charming quirks such as charging for listening to him brooding) to make Fef break it off? In Homestuck she broke things off with him as soon as they were in the game and Glubglub didn't have to be fed 413 lusii a minute, but there's no SGRUB in Pesterquest; we see Fef's mom in her route, yet we don't hear anything about Eridan's whole Orphaner Jr thing...
-Regarding his additional lack of friends: it's perfectly understandable that Kanaya would drop him, considering she had to deal with a lot of his bullshit back in the comic, but I thought Karkat was actually friends with Eridan? Before Murderstuck of course, but that's obviously not happened in Pesterquest...
-Eridan's 13 years old (and also in charge of feeding glubglub, let's not forget that), where the hell has he found the time to make a nuisance of himself (to the point where employees in some places are legally allowed to stab him if he bothers them) on like half the actual planet????
-MC's reaction when confronted with a room full of fancy clothing is, of course, Big Hype... And wanting something new for their wardrobe.
-so, are Eridan and Roxy nb wizard solidarity?
-Chances are everybody’s already seen this by now orz but I need it to establish a base: Hussie's made an statement where he explained -amongst other things- Eridan's deal with Shrek, originally from [S] Collide. That post could be summarized as:
1) highblood lusii tend to suck ass because of high expectations and low emotional availability, & seahorsedad wasn't an exception; so when the trolls were looking up human stuff back in the meteor and Eridan found Shrek, he saw him as a Good Lusus Figure.
2) Sollux, however, has a good dad that loves and supports his trans son (as sollux trans confirmed) and is also Kinda Ogre Shaped, and Eridan resents him for that → rivalry
3) (it's also confirmed that the eridan from [s] collide was legitimately so happy to be spending time with his dad shrek that he never realized he was dead)
-So: where did Eridan (more like whoever’s in charge of the cinema actually?) get Shrek 2 from if he's never had any contact with humans in this timeline / reality / canon chunk??? It might be one of the Funky Timeline Changes we made in Aradia's route.
-Also: if Eridan knows Sollux is trans (implied in the post but not confirmed), then the conversation the two have later in the route (and specifically Why Eridan begins that conversation) kiiinda takes a dump on his talk about gender (which otherwise is a very good sign that he's got the potential to be a decent person IF he gets his shit together and also thinks about other things -most obviously the hemospectrum- with the same level of depth and all that).
-MC's had their first taste of their Homestuck memories. Let's see how they get them back this time.
-not to self plug (too much) but one of Eridan's fancy articles of clothing looks a Lot like an outfit that's appeared in Mirrorbent?? (← warning for a bit of blood) The one with the purple and yellow gradient in the rack furthest to the right... the one in mirrorbent is basically Gramma Loreto Rights: The Jacket
-After the rollercoaster of hapenings that is his route, Eridan finally understands that he's got to change himself and unlearn all of Alternia's bullshit if he wants his situation to change for the better. Can't believe it took getting An Actual Mall thrown at him to make him realize that...........
-(That mall is of course the one from Daraya's Friendsim- and she sure felt like a Destruction class back then... 2x hopeprince combo mayhaps?)
-Kanaya said in Sollux's route that it was less than advisable for him to overexert his powers, and the only thing he *doesn't* use here is his psionic blasts- hope he's fine! (then again this is probably our last volume on alternia and blah blah blah)
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Chapter 4
Notes: Nothing really groundbreaking in this chapter lol, just that on average each chapter is 7 to 8 pages and if I put the big shit in this chapter it would be super long. Hope you enjoy it anyway!!
You wake up to someone shaking you quite vigorously. You blink sleepily and mumble. 
"'m too tired for this shit motherfucker." You glance over to see it's Karkat.
"Well get over it. It's your fault we ended up going to sleep so late." 
"That's harsh bro." You yawn and stretch out on the couch. Karkat is looking at you impatiently.
"You have an hour and a half to get ready so I'd get a move on if I were you." 
You nod lazily, all in motherfuckin time. Tavros walks in rubbing his eyes all sleepily. You can't help but to think he is damn cute when sleepy, well to be fair he is damn cute all the time but especially when he is sleepy. 
"Mornin T-dog" you manage a lazy ass wave. 
"Mornin Gamzee, d-did you uh fall asleep in here?" 
"Mhm, bed was just too damn far."
Tavros giggles. "Could of uh, just went to my bed if it uh, would have been easier." He immediately blushes profusely. "U-uh i mean, uhhh. G-gotta go, talk to you later!" He very quickly heads out into the hall, presumably going to the bathroom. 
You look at Karkat wide eyed, "uh.. did that.. make any sense to you? He wasn't like, I mean it sounded kind of like maybe…" you trail off. Best not get your hopes up on all that. He was probably just joking. 
"God you're such a fucking dumbass." 
"How so Karbro?" 
"Clearly, Gamzee, Tavros has red feelings for you and we all know how you feel about him. I swear you two idiots would be perfect together if you weren't so fucking stupid." 
"Wait.. really? No joke?" 
"Oh my god, yes Gamzee, no fucking jokes here." He gestures around wildly, "do you fucking see any jokes dipshit." 
Dave walks in. "I dunno dude, I think I see one joke in this room." He's looking at you. You growl a bit under your breath but you stop once you hear Karkat chuckle a bit. 
"Bro, are you siding with motherfuckin Strider over me??" 
"No, no, it's just, I mean it's kinda funny Gamzee." 
"Well I think it's motherfuckin rude." 
Dave interjects. "You're literally a clown. A walking joke, literally." 
You stand up swiftly, that pisses you off. "Oh? Want me to show you how motherfuckin funny I can be?" You growl threateningly. 
"Oh I'm so scared." 
You take a step forward but Karkat grabs your arm. "Gamzee. Shower, go." He points towards the door giving you a no nonsense look. You grumble a bit but you do as he says. As you get yourself all cleaned up and ready for the day you can’t help but to think about Tavros. Does he really feel the same feelings as you? I mean Karkat wouldn’t lead you wrong, and he does notice these kinds of things so… Maybe it is true? Should you make a move then? Before you can really consider that much more Karkat comes and shouts at you for taking too long. 
"I swear to God if you make me late for our first fucking class Gamzee. I mean fuck do you even know your schedule?" 
You give him a sweet lil smile. "Nope. But I know you do.~" 
Karkat sighs. "Yeah, you're not wrong. I fucking did your schedule cause I know you're a dumbass. It's the same as mine so just follow me around like a little quackbeast." 
You figured as much. "All right Karbro, I'm all up and ready anyway so lead away." 
"... You literally don't have your bag dipshit." 
"Uh.. aaallrriighhtyy I'm almost ready then." You look embarrassed, of course, the most important thing. You run to the room and grab it real fast then come back to Karkat. "Ok, now I'm motherfuckin ready." 
You give him a double thumbs up and a cheesy smile. He rolls his eyes at your antics and mumbles something about associating with idiots. Either way he grabs your hand and pulls you off towards your first class. You walk hand in hand across campus heading for the humanities building or so Karkat called it. All the buildings kind of look the same to you. As you walk you notice a few humans giving you guys weird looks, you wonder why but soon dismiss it as you enter the building. The halls are bustling with trolls you notice, you give Karkat a questioning look.
“There are a lot of classes about human culture here so of course there is going to be a bunch of trolls.” He gives you a look that suggests you should have thought about that. “Anyway most of our classes are here, Earth History, Human psychology, and English. We are going to English 101 right now.”
You sigh dramatically. You get the feeling that it is going to be a very boring day. And it is, once you got through with the humanities building you and Karkat had to walk all the way across campus to the science building to learn about Earth biology and such. Then again you had to walk a ridiculous distance to your final class. Human Health. It seemed to be a waste of a day honestly, each class went over boring “syllabus” shit and you learned nothing. 
However, throughout the day there was this uncomfortable atmosphere. Of the trolls attending the university the mid to lowbloods rarely glanced you and Karkat’s way. Unless they sat next to you where they looked very uncomfortable and your attempts to look all friendly like were not appreciated and they just looked more scared. Same with the humans. John, Jade, Rose, and Dave are so chill with you and your friends that you assumed other humans would be ok like that too but turns out that was a big resounding motherfuckin no. The case was very different with the Higher Castes. Blue and up were openly disgusted by both you and Karkat. With Karkat it was more understandable, he’s a mutant and we were taught that mutants shouldn’t exist and yada yada. You never really cared. 
You are not sure if they give you looks because you clearly associate with Karkat or if there is another reason. Other than your friends you never really associated to much with other High Bloods despite you being a purple blood of the faith. You were mostly high all the time so you didn’t get out much. But now you can see that your fellow purple blooded motherfuckers are MUCH taller than you and typically built heavier. You never really realized that you were so physically stunted in comparison. That said you still are much taller than most of your friends. Equius is taller than you, so is Feferi. Eridan and Vriska are about your height. And then the rest of your friends are shorter whether by a little or a lot. Nepeta being the shortest of them all yet still as fierce as she is cute. 
When you guys finally head back to the dorm building you make sure to keep Karkat close to you. You don’t think anyone will try anything at least while they are under human supervision but you’d rather be safe than sorry, you would never forgive yourself if something happened to Karkat. You almost laugh, first Karkat was worrying over you and now you are doing the same to him. Karkat was oddly silent for the walk. You weren’t adding any commentary yourself but typically Karkat is almost always going on about something. Neither of you guys speak until you enter the room.
“Wow, maybe this is going to be harder than anticipated.” 
You glance at Karkat then hum in agreement. “I don’t think you are the only problem Kar.” You gesture to yourself. “I’m pretty sure I got some dirty looks too. Never really realized how short I was compared to others of my blood. Then add up the both of us together, the mutant and the druggy.” You sigh dramatically. You had hoped your dramaticism would lighten the mood but Karkat still looks insecure. 
“Look, despite me being all up a short motherfucker I’m still more than strong enough to protect my best bro.” You stick your tongue out at him and flex your arms comedically. It works, Karkat gives a soft chuckle. 
“You look ridiculous, please stop I swear to god I am going to throw up at this display of idiocy.”
You laugh and oblige. “Besides, the humans aren’t all happy with violence and all that. Any troll who does shit will be booted from Earth most likely.” Karkat nods and looks a bit better, reassured by your words. “Now how about we get our comfort on on the couch and watch some shitty romcoms.”
“Fuck you they are NOT shitty!” You just laugh. 
A few weeks pass relatively uneventfully. The humans started relaxing a bit in the trolls presence and some of the highbloods appear to have gotten bored of giving you and Karkat menacing looks. That doesn’t mean all of them have quite their shit but it is way better and both you and Karkat feel much more relaxed about it. The only interesting thing that has been happening has been you and Dave continuing your fued. If you didn’t know better you would assume he was black flirting with you, but as a human you doubt he would understand the concept. The other three don’t seem to. Well, maybe Rose does, she is pretty smart but appears to have no interest in any of the other romances. So there you are, head in Karkat’s lap on the couch complaining about Dave. 
“Ugghhh, Dave is such a motherfucking asshole.” you practically growl each word your frustration quite evident.
“He’s not that bad Gamzee.” Karkat mutters a slight blush on his face.
“Kaaarrrrkkkaaattt, stop defending him! Can’t you see I am suffering? The black feelings in my blood pusher are almost too much for this motherfucker to bear.” you say this very dramatically. 
“Well, maybe stop fucking flirting with him and do something more productive. For example, you still haven’t made a move regarding Tavros. Even though I literally told you that he feels the same as you do. I swear everyone is just waiting with bated breath for you two bulge fondlers to just do something already. The tension between you too is almost palpable. If one of you guys don’t say anything we are all going to start frothing at the mouth starved for the sweet sweet release that you two getting together will bring us.” 
You blush profusely. “Well it’s not like it is easy to just up and confess to your red crush. What am I supposed to say? What if I fuck it up?? You know I’m not good with words when I am nervous!.” 
“Uh, no I am not, for one I don’t think I have ever seen you nervous. You have idiot confidence, which is to say that it’s a lot of confidence because you are stupid as fuck.” 
“..Uh.. Point taken? Still, I don’t know, should I take him on a date? What if he thinks it is just a friendly outing?” You groan with frustration, hiding your embarrassed face with your hands.
“Well Gamzee, you don’t know until you try dumbass. Tavros is probably too shy to make a move so it’s kind of on you bud.” 
You groan again. And of course Tavros just happens to walk into the dorm room. 
“Uh.. Are you alright Gam?” 
You stutter and stumble over your words. “I uh, f-fuck, uhhh, just great, fantastic, um, never better! T-totally wasn’t talking about you or anything! Like hah! Why would I be talking about my cute- u-uh I mean cool! Rap buddy. Yeah.” Your face feels like it is on fire. 
“Um, o-ok, and uhh, thanks m-maybe? I uhh, j-just remembered that I t-totally forgot that I have a class I need to be at uh, so b-bye!” He rushes out of the dorm room as fast as possible. He doesn’t have his bag. Also It is like 8 o’clock and you know he doesn’t have night classes. 
“Well, that was a fucking trainwreck.” Karkat sighs. That is an understatement. 
“Uuuuuuuuuugggghhhhhh!” you groan for the damn third time. “I told you I would motherfuckin fuck it up”
“Yeah, I stand corrected. I didn’t realize the full extent of how socially incompetent you two are. Look, how about you just ask him to a movie or something and you know, don’t be an awkward fuckwad. Just act fucking normal and then just make a move, you know, like the classic stretch and arm over his shoulder thing. If he has literally any braincells he is sure to figure out the meaning of that at least. Look, how about we watch some movies and you take fucking notes on how to actually fucking do this shit.” You are 99% sure this is just an excuse to just watch romcoms. But you just roll your eyes with a smile and just go with it. 
Even later that night when Tavros finally returns to the room you are on the couch trying to look suave and cool but you are probably failing. “Uh, hey Tavbro, sorry about earlier. Um, sooo by chance would you be down to see a motherfuckin movie or maybe um just chill the fuck out somewhere, get some food or whatever. If you want to.” You look away avoiding eye contact. 
“Uh, yeah, that um, sounds like fun. I’d be uh, down to see a movie with you.” In your peripheral vision you can see he is biting his lip. He says the next thing really quickly. “Imeantotallyinafriendwayofcourse!” Your smile falters a bit before you force it back on your face. “..cool, great, yeah, of course..” Your voice sounds a bit strained. Wow this is going badly. 
“Well, um, does tomorrow night sound up and good with you?”
“Y-yeah, uh, sounds great.”
“Wicked. Um, anyway I’m just going to uh..” you gesture towards the bedroom. “..sleep and, yeah.” You abruptly stand up and quickly yeet yourself up into your bed and burrow into your blankets with amazing speed. You bury your face into your pillow to hide the shame written all over your face. You really dicked this up huh. After a few minutes Tavros eventually comes into the room and heads to bed. At least you assume that as your face is buried into your pillow at the moment. It takes you a while but eventually you drift off to sleep. 
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blaperile · 6 years ago
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Homestuck Epilogue(s) - Prologue (page 1)
I've just read right until the end of the first Prologue page. Under the Read More are my initial reactions!
Oh boy... it's time. Time for the Epilogues... assuming it's available yet and/or the link on homestuck.com doesn't lead to a VIZ Media buy link for a book form of the Epilogue, I could also see that happening. xD plainWonder also had a good point that perhaps the first part of the epilogue will simply be the snaps we already saw on the MSPA Snapchat. ...Snaps almost feels like a weird thing to say now. I think they've just gotten a way darker meaning for me ever since watching Avengers: Infinity War. xD ANYWAY, without further ado, here we go!!! *clicks link* Hehn, kind of looks like the start page of an all new adventure! And yay, looks like the epilogue IS indeed simply on the website itself and not externally, for I see a command leading to the next page! *hovers over link of > Start and sees URL* www.homestuck.com/epilogues/prologue ....SERIOUSLY??? PFFFFFFFF, typical Hussie right there. Only HE can give an epilogue a prologue. xD Oh boy this is gonna be a long epilogue isn't it. The question is, how much of it is available here already? And what is the prologue even going to be? Will they just be the snaps we've already seen? I'm very curious where this is going now. > Start ....HOLY FUCK. Archive of our own parody??? Or an actual Archive of Our Own "fanfic"???? Oh jegus god. We've truly come full circle now that Hussie is doing a parody of a website famous for housing Homestuck fanfics. Looks like Andrew collaborated with a few people? "Rating: Mature" Sounds about right! "Category: F/F, F/M, M/M, Multi, Other" Sounds about right! "Fandom: Homestuck" Sounds about right! "Characters: John Egbert, Rose Lalonde, Dave Strider, Jade Harley, Jane Crocker, Roxy Lalonde, Jake English, Dirk Strider, Barack Obama" Sounds about ri...WAIT A SECOND. PFFFFFFFFFFFFF Hell fucking yes xD "Aradia Megido, Tavros Nitram, Sollux Captor, Karkat Vantas, Kanaya Maryam, Terezi Pyrope, Vriska Serket, Gamzee Makara, Eridan Ampora, Feferi Peixes, Aranea Serket, Meenah Peixes, Davepetasprite^2, Calliope, Caliborn, Lord English, Original Male Character(s), Original Female Character(s)" Well if this isn't a joke, I'd be VERY happy to see Eridan and Feferi again along with the rest of the gang! Aranea though!!!! That's got me very curious. Is she alive (as in, dead but not double dead)??? I know that was really ambiguous on whether or not she was double dead or not after being killed by GO!Condesce. Kind of sad the other A1 Trolls aren't on the list. Hmm, mention of Davepetasprite^2 but nothing of the other Sprites! Makes sense if this is mainly taking place in the Furthest Ring. Wait a second.... I only just noticed how Equius is the only A2 Troll missing from this list!!! And no true separate mention of Nepeta either. Oh man. Looks like Arquiusprite (who should be on Earth) is also sitting this one out! ...Equius got voided out. :P I also find it very interesting how Caliborn receives a separate mention from Lord English! Are we going to see something from the fight that took place between Caliborn and the Kids? ...Wait, that DID feature Arquiusprite though, who is missing from this list. HMMMMMMM And oh boy, what should we expect from the "original male character(s), original female character(s)"????? Are some of the people from Universe C going to factor into this? Assuming we can take this list of characters seriously... which I kind of doubt considering Barack Obama is on the list. xD ...THOSE CONTENT WARNINGS. OH MY GOD. Oh god I love this already. Kankri would be so proud. :P "The Economy" ==> I got that reference! xD I love all the Gamzee related content warnings. "Trickster Mode" I DARE YOU HUSSIE "Ten years after their adventure began, the heroes are enjoying a well-earned retirement on Earth C. But John still has one last choice to make." HOLY SHIT. 10 years later?! That's... 2 years later from the last thing we saw from John, when he celebrated his 21st birthday and was challenged by Caliborn! Wait... 10 years after the start. THAT'S NOW. It's frickin 2019!!!!! Oh hell yes, Andrew has made it catch up to reality once more. HELL YES. What is the "one last choice" John has to make? To go after Caliborn, which will presumably get them trapped inside the Plot Hole (which is still a term I love to use)? Jeez... that probably means it's also already been so many years since Terezi left. I can't recall on which of John's birthdays it was. Was it his 17th? 18th? I'll check that later. In the contents there is only a "Prologue" link... Oh boy, is this going to lead straight to Archive of Our Own? *hovers over link* www.homestuck.com/epilogues/prologue/1 Nope! Unless this redirects, we're staying on the Homestuck website. *clicks on link* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH Oh god WALL OF TEXT. Looks like... this really is going to be like a "fanfic", without any images?? I suddenly feel like we're reading one of Hussie's recaps and/or Rose's walkthrough. xD "It starts with a crack. Everything else rises up from that like steam: a trembling thread that cuts through space in jagged lines, splintering the void into razor-sharp shards of putrefying leptons and quarks popping apart like raw eggs in a microwave." Only Hussie could write a sentence like that, ahahaha. Seems like he's talking about the cracks in the Furthest Ring? Are these... going to turn out to be, like,  notes taken by his self-insert who was also right there in the Furthest Ring? :P "raw eggs in a microwave" Well, that explains the "eggs" content warning. xD "At the center of that hole the edges can be heard fraying. Pandemonium, as continuity buckles in the middle and the two ends come smashing together. Around the hole, ghosts scream. They claw at the dying borders of their dreams with fingernail-chipping desperation." Dang, these descriptions are giving me shivers. It reminds me of the sight that Terezi saw in the Furthest Ring and sent to the others on Earth. "At the center, that distortion turns into an eerie music. That’s where the cacophony ends—the shattering, the screaming, the squelching, the sounds of elemental particles being torn apart like string cheese shoved through a meat grinder, then dumped down a strangely melodious garbage disposal." Okay I'm sorry, but I can't help but think of the garbage disposal in Dave's appartment. ...I was saying that as a joke, but now that I think about it actually, this reminds me of how I once made a theory of how that disposal scene was some foreshadowing for the creation of Lord English, mostly because of the Saw and purple Smuppet stuff, but now suddenly the garbage disposal element comes into mention here too. HMMMMMMM "This is the end of everything. This is the end of Paradox Space. You..." Oh man, where is this going? Is it going to turn out there's some kind of other realm beyond the Black Hole that all of the ghosts got sucked into? Like, a true kind of afterlife? "Your name is John Egbert, and you have just had a terrible, deeply pretentious nightmare. You snap out of bed, soaked in sweat, your heart hammering like a fire alarm. It is just as you feared." And suddenly we're John! Has the images Terezi sent them been leaving him with these kind of nightmares? Eeesh.... "You’ve been dreaming in anime again. And you have no idea what it could mean." ...OH GOD DAMN IT HUSSIE YOU BRILLIANT BASTARD. XD "> Look outside just to make absolutely sure the world is not ending." And suddenly we're in Act 1 all over again. :P "The only sound you can hear for miles is the wind skimming the hollows of your neighbors’ pipe homes." Oh hell yes, reference to the wind skimming the void. And heh, at least that last part confirms we're really in the present now where John lives in his salamander neighborhood, not that we're actually somehow back at the events of Act 1 or something. "It’s a normal day in the salamander village, which you refer to as Salamander Village because the damned salamanders never bothered to give this village a name, you guess." ...I could see that. xD That must mean there are like hundreds or thousands of those kinds of villages, hahahaha. Really mustn't be convenient for any non-Consort people trying to navigate over there. :P "Beside your pillow, your phone is vibrating. Rose is calling. The screen of your phone reads 9:30 a.m. April 13, and also the number forty-six, which is how many text messages your friend left you while you were sleeping. A bit excessive, even for her." Rooooooooose! Okay, that's a huge relief to me. I kind of feared they'd all completely drifted apart in the past few years and hardly heard from each other anymore, so I'm really glad to see Rose talking to John is apparently still a thing. And that she's still apparently as wordy as ever. :P I wonder if we're gonna get a dialog (or Rose monologue) now? "Answer the phone" Oh hell fucking yes, here comes some sweet, sweeeeeet dialogue/monologue! "ROSE: Since when are you known to operate your telephone? JOHN: since... i don’t know. has it really been that long since i called? ROSE: I can’t remember the last time. JOHN: neither can i. anyway, what’s up?" Awwww, okay that's sad to hear. I take back what I said earlier, looks like they really don't hear from each other that often anymore. :( "ROSE: Am I correct in presuming this April Thirteenth will be as uneventful as the last? JOHN: yeah, i don’t want to do anything this year. i hope that’s ok." Looks like he still feels the same way like the past few years. D: I feel so sad for John. This really doesn't feel like a happy ending for him. If only he still had his Dad... "All over the neighborhood, the little dad-salamanders are putting on their little rumpled hats and picking up their little suitcases and kissing their little families goodbye for the day" Okay, on one hand the comparisons with John's own family situation are really sad, but I can't help but ROFL that Rumpled Hats are still a thing in this society. "You’ve always been confused about what, exactly, they contribute to the global economy. But it’s pretty cute how much they love playing at being suburban businessmen." Hey, there's where the Economy content warning came from! And it didn't even have to do with Barack Obama! xD "The silence over the phone is growing awkward. You’ve stalled long enough. You decide to just come out and say it." Oh boy... what is he going to say? Something about how sad he is with the current situation? "JOHN: i’ve been dreaming in anime again lately." PFFFFFFFFFFF, JOHN. JOHN NEVER CHANGE. We're getting some hella sweet new quotes here. :P Also, I'd find it really funny if it turns out he's been dreaming of the events of Act 7 which, from our perspective, were rendered in anime form. "JOHN: i have no idea what it could mean. ROSE: I see." Rose, looks like you've found someone to psycho-analyze again! xD "JOHN: whenever i have these dreams, everything’s breaking apart. JOHN: millions of people are screaming and dying. JOHN: i mean, dying permanently. not the kind of bullshit dying that we’ve been doing a lot over the years." Okay so he WAS actually dreaming the stuff we read at the beginning of this prologue then. I love how he calls "their" dying bullshit. " JOHN: what do you think it all means? ROSE: What do I think ‘what’ means? JOHN: what do you think it means that i’ve been dreaming in anime? ROSE: I don’t have the slightest idea what it means that you’ve been dreaming in anime, John. ROSE: To be honest, I... You wait for Rose to finish her thought. She doesn’t, which is troubling because you have never known Rose to leave a thought unfinished in over ten years of acquaintance." That's... indeed quite troubling! Normally this kind of thing is truly Rose's specialty. What's going on over on her side? I mean, it did seem like there was more she wanted to say than just "happy birthday". ....Thinking back to the content warnings... is Rose or Kanaya pregnant??? I don't want to put too much trust into those content warnings though. :P "ROSE: I held out for as long as I could. I figured your birthday was as good a time as any to let you know. JOHN: let me know what?" HERE IT COMES!!!!! "ROSE: It’s crept up on me, these last couple of years. ROSE: Gradually enough to ignore as it was happening, but I can’t anymore." ...Wait what??? Oh god, that does sound different from having a baby. Oh man, please don't tell me she wants to divorce from Kanaya. D: "ROSE: Lately the visions have been overwhelming. JOHN: visions??" Ohhhh, visions! Huh. What kind of visions? About Caliborn? About what's happening in the Furthest Ring? Something else? "ROSE: Would you mind flying to my apartment, so we can continue this in person?" Wait a second. She lives in an apartment now? Looks like unlike John she didn't stay in her old house! Interesting how she moved into an apartment, like Dave originally lived in. "You move the phone away from your ear and assume an expression you haven’t practiced in years. It is the look of a man who actually has something to do." Dang, he must have been getting REALLY bored all this time. That time alone on LOMAX must have been peanuts compared to this. "As you hang up the phone, a familiar feeling settles over you. A feeling of...standing?" ...Has he been floating the entire time? "Standing, and being alone. In your bedroom. As a young man. On your birthday." OH SNAP. I got the reference now. xD "A young man stands alone in his bedroom. It just so happens that today, the 13th of April, is this young man’s birthday. Though it was twenty-three years ago when he was given life, and ten years ago when he was given a name, it feels like it is only today that he will begin to understand what all that means. That young man is YOU, John Egbert. What will you do?" HOLY FUCKING SHIT. OH DAMN. OH SHIT. THAT IS WAY FUCKING EPIC MAN. This is giving me HELLA goosebumps! I'm VERY curious about that final part means, about "understanding what all that means".... Okay, this seems like a good place to end for the day, but I'm VERY excited to start reading the rest!!! Homestuck is BACK IN ACTION baby! Last Edit: 1 minute ago by Blaperile
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othercat2 · 7 years ago
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fic: (they flow from form to form) 16/?
==>Karkat: be the parfit gentil knight
From Terezi’s bedroom, they wander into the kitchen. Terezi sits at the table, and Karkat rummages around in the fridge. “So there’s left over homemade macaroni and cheese and meat loaf. In the freezer we have Salisbury Steak, Swedish Meatballs, Sweet and Sour Chicken and some pot pies.”
“Mac and cheese and meatloaf,” Terezi says. Her chin is resting cupped in one of her hands as she watches him. She’s smiling, a little bit.
Karkat heats a plate for himself first. (Terezi: “Rude!” Karkat: “I’m a guest; you should be making something for me.”) Then he heats a second plate up for Terezi, setting it down in front of her, along with a can of soda. “So, I guess I’m going to be here, at least until your mom and Si fix whatever Dad did,” he says tentatively.
Terezi is quiet for a moment, poking at her mac and cheese. “We could watch a movie, maybe,” she suggests, voice just as tentative. “Or play video games.”
“We could do that,” Karkat says. He eats some of his meatloaf. He notices--becomes aware somehow--that Hope isn’t around anymore. “Huh. He’s gone.”
“Wanted us to settle this ourselves,” Terezi says.
“Yeah,” Karkat says. “I think we did, though. You were setup, it’s apparently lucky the Gods think I’m cute or whatever, and everything is kinda fucked up because weird religious shenanigans.”  
Terezi’s laugh is rusty and sad. “And I shouldn’t blame myself?”
“Not really no,” Karkat says. He’s silent for a moment, concentrating mostly on the contents of his plate. Finally, he asks, “So, when did the Gods start passing you love notes, or whatever?” He was more than a little curious about how it might work for an “insider” as opposed to well, him.
This time Terezi’s laugh sounds a little more like her usual self. “Before the school year,” she says. “It was just little hints, a song I liked coming up more often on the radio, visions being a little clearer, little gifts showing up on my dresser. I was nervous? And I didn’t want to read too much into it, you know? Sometimes the Gods show favor, and it doesn’t mean anything except They’re in a good mood and They like you. I didn’t get the nerve to actually ask until the end of September.”
“How did they let you know?” Karkat asks.
Terezi grinned. “I woke up with frost all over the window, the next morning, leaves, flowers all over the glass and the answer to my question; ‘yes, we would court you.’” She pokes at her food, takes a bite. “Then there was a lot of awful poetry,” she says in a deadpan critical tone.
Karkat laughs, feeling brighter, lighter somehow at the comment. “Awful poetry seems to be a thing,” he says.
“Ohhh?” Terezi asks with lifted brows. “How bad are we talking?”
Karkat shrugs. “Pretty bad. Uh. He was trying to reassure me I think? In rhyme.” He felt a little reluctant to share the details, given how annoyed Feferi got about his tentacle god jokes. He didn’t want to upset Terezi, when they were just starting to talk again.
Terezi’s eyes widen. “--butthole squid babies?” she asks, and cracks up laughing.  
Karkat felt his face heat up. “What the heck?”
Terezi points behind him, and at the same time there’s a sharp caw. Karkat turns, and sees the crow perched up on the refrigerator. “Just sharing a rhyme, ain’t no crime,” the crow says.
“Your poetry is a felony,” Karkat retorts.
“My rhymes got mad flow
Wherever I go
I drop sick beats
Bring sizzle to the pan
Grilling your meats,
Like you know I can,” the crow says.  
“I’m really impressed,” Karkat says. “No really, I’m impressed you could say that, and have no idea how stupid that sounded.”
“They’re better when he gets warmed up,” Terezi says. “But that was not your best,” she says to the crow.
The crow preens its wing, and Karkat immediately thinks of a cat grooming itself all nonchalant after embarrassing itself. All, “I meant to do that.” Though in this case, Karkat suspected the crow really had meant to do that. “You get visited by the crow a lot too?” Karkat asks.
Terezi shrugs. “The crow’s showed up, and usually Time Himself. Breath, Light, Space, Hope a lot recently.” The last is said with an irritable frown and a glare. Not at Karkat though, but at some point space off to the side. There’s nothing there but a countertop and cabinets as far as Karkat can tell, however.
The crow makes an almost human sounding chuckle, and flaps down to perch on one of the kitchen chairs. He eyes the meatloaf on Karkat’s plate.
“Don’t even think about it,” Karkat says, and puts his hand up to protect his plate from marauding crows.
“A little bit won’t hurt him, Karkat,” Terezi says.
“I’m not worried about him getting hurt, I’m worried he’ll steal it,” Karkat says. “You don’t like Hope?” Karkat asks.
“I’d like Him better if He’d leave me alone,” Terezi mutters. The next bite of mac and cheese is definitely aggravated. “He’s here because I’ve been…sick.”
“Depressed,” the crow says.
“Depressed,” Terezi echoes, and flips the crow off. The crow laughs again.
“Because of what happened?” Karkat asks.
“And because I get depressed,” Terezi says. “Though what happened didn’t help. I stopped taking pills during my fast, even though they’re permitted and when I got back I spent most of the time asleep, pretending to be asleep and ignoring texts from Sol.” Terezi sighs. “Then Hope manifested and I’m suddenly taking my pills and He’s being cheerful at me and argh.”  
“Did he uh, make you take your pills? Or just tell you to?” Karkat asks, a little uncertain about that last.
Terezi tilts the palm of her hand side to side in a “either or” gesture. “Well, He manifested and His Aspect made me feel better, and therefore made me more likely to take my meds? But it wasn’t like mind control which is what I think you’re implying?”
“Yeah, kinda. Sorry,” Karkat says, feeling a little guilty about asking despite it being a legitimate concern. Then he’s distracted by the crow, which has swooped in on his plate. “Dammit!” He catches the crow and almost immediately he lets go of it, surprised by the almost burning heat, the fast beat of its heart, and the sense he’d gotten of the molten Blood beneath skin and feathers. The crow takes advantage of his surprise to snag a chunk of meat loaf and abscond for the countertop.
Karkat half expects his fingers to be blistered and singed by the heat, but they’re unhurt. “That doesn’t happen when you land on me,” Karkat says accusingly to the crow.
“Did you try to grab him?” Terezi asks. “Well, there you go then,” she says when Karkat shakes his head.
“Is the crow actually Time? He hasn’t been to clear on that,” Karkat says.
“Time speaks through the crow sometimes,” Terezi says. She grins. “And sometimes Time takes the shape of a crow.”
This didn’t exactly explain if the crow at this point in time was “the crow” or Time in the shape of a crow. Karkat glances at the crow, which is poking around at appliances on the countertop. He had a feeling that a straight answer wasn’t going to be a thing in the immediate future.
“I kind of wish I’d known about all of this sooner,” Karkat says, after poking at the contents of his plate for a while. “I get you needed to keep things hidden, but I’m still kind of upset you didn’t tell me anything.”
“So do I,” Terezi says. “I kind of wanted to, but I wasn’t sure if you’d be staying. I mean it seemed like you might settle, and Mister Vantas is a really great teacher, but it’s usually years before outsiders see what’s going on in the town.” She frowns. “You saw a lot anyway. I wonder how much you did see through, just because you’re Blood?”
Karkat shrugs. “I figured you were pagan? My dad has pagan friends.” Terezi grins at that. “Anyway I mostly noticed the lack of those little cardboard Pilgrim and Native American pictures in stereotypical costumes around Thanksgiving and that the Christmas decorations didn’t show up until December,” he says. Also, it had mostly been Christmas trees, Santa Clause and candy canes, with maybe doves and stars being as far most of the décor around businesses got to religious symbolism. Homes had more religious symbolism, but they didn’t show up till the first week of December.
“Oooh, usually outsiders notice the lack of churches, and they have to go to the next town over,” Terezi says.
Karkat shrugs. He had noticed, and it had seemed strange, but it wasn’t nearly as strange as Christmas decorations neatly confined to December first through to the twenty fifth, except at the Walmart. “I was raised mostly agnostic,” he says. According to the town history he’d read, there had been a few churches up until the 1930s. Then there had been a couple of church burning incidents, after which the high priestess decreed the remaining churches would be burnt down. (“And the arsonists should be glad I don’t burn their homes, with themselves and all their family besides.”)    
After dinner, they put the dirty dishes in the dish washer and head into the living room. Neither of them really have a lot of interest in watching a movie, or going back to Terezi’s room to play video games. Instead, Karkat talks about school, about what he’s been learning from Feferi and Si. At first he tries to hide the parts where he’d been deliberately provoking Feferi, not wanting to offend Terezi. She gets the details out of him anyway, and cackles about it.
“Soo, not offended that I was disrespectful to your high priestess?” Karkat asks.
“If she was really angry about anything you said, she doesn’t need me to defend her honor,” Terezi says. “And if you were being a complete jerk I’d be mad you were hurting Feferi’s feelings, not that you were being rude to the high priestess. I kind of wish I’d been there. Poor Fef!” She giggles. “Was anyone offended on her behalf?”
“Um. Eridan, Equius I think Kanaya a little bit, and also Sollux.” Karkat pauses. “I think he has a crush on her?”
“Eridan and Equius are both from super traditional families,” Terezi says. “They are both super preppy.”
“Eridan seems more like a Goth,” Karkat says.
“Goth-Preppy hybrid,” Terezi says, and snickers. “Goppy? No, that sounds like one of Fef’s puns. Equius’ only redeeming quality is that he’s friends with Nepeta--though okay, I lie, he’s been much less of an asshole after he got the part time job at Benson and Quill Auto.” She grins. “Kanaya is the mom-friend and Sol has had the stupidest crush on Feferi since forever. Sollux is a dumb butt.”
“A dumb butt who’s been pretty worried about you,” Karkat can’t help but say.
Terezi’s eyebrows lift. “Are you the dad-friend, Karkat? Gonna make me text Sol?”
“Do I have to?” Karkat asks. “I mean, he’s your friend and he’s worried about you, right?”
Terezi makes a disgusted noise. “You sound like your dad,” Terezi accuses, and goes to get her cell.
She comes back into the living room, and spends some time texting with Sollux. Sollux meanwhile texts Karkat and they have an awkward three way conversation via until they get on a Pesterchum memo together. Sollux yells at Terezi in the memo, and asks Karkat for details about the emergency. This leads to them both explaining Mind and Doom interactions when collaborating on a Working.
CG: I AM PRETTY SURE THIS IS ADVANCED LEVEL STUFF I HAVEN’T GOTTEN TO YET GUYS.
GC: H33 H33 H33 W3’LL DUMB 1T DOWN FOR YOU!
TA: thii2 ii2 ju2t ba2iic two A22pect Work kk
TA: waiit tiil you have two figure out quint2 and 2extet2
TA: we’re not even  gettiing iinto fray motiifs
CG: THE FUCK IS A FRAY MOTIF?
Sollux doesn’t give an explanation. Instead he types KK DUCK, which is echoed out loud by Terezi, and in some weird internal way by something in his head. He rolls off the couch just as something smashes against the window. The glass cracks, but doesn’t break.
Terezi joins him on the floor. She shouts a word, and bright patterns flicker across the floor, up the walls and meet at the ceiling. Karkat recognizes some of the symbols, almost makes sense of what they mean before they make his eyes water and he has to look away. “What the fuck?” There’s nothing but a crackle of static from the phones.
“Stay down,” Terezi says. “Sol’s gonna get his dad, and call Feferi. Hopefully we don’t have to hold the fort for too long.”
There’s another crack against the window, along with a bright flash. “Okay, we’re being attacked. No shit, Karkat. Who’s attacking us?”
“I can’t see clearly,” Terezi says. “And I’m kinda hoping the attack isn’t two pronged.”
“Two pronged, you mean my Dad?” Karkat asks with a sick sort of feeling. “Why?”
“Outsiders, corrupting influence who the fuck knows,” Terezi says, voice brittle and frustrated. She takes a breath. “Okay, you want to find out about fray motifs?” She asks, and lights up bright teal, a three armed spiral appearing around her head. “Let’s try some firsthand experience.” She holds out her hand. “Take my hand.”
Karkat hesitates for less than a second, then grabs her hand. “I have no idea what you want me to do--” he says, but then he knows, because Terezi has dropped the information in his head. He activates a Blood sigil, and wraps the lines of a defensive pattern around Terezi’s mind sigil.
The defensive pattern spins, and then separates into three-limbed, curved blades of light dark red and bright teal. They split again and again.
(The lights go out, but they can still see. Indistinct shapes on the other door linked together and somehow shielded.)
Two shuriken or whatever they were spin toward the indistinct shapes. The shapes dodge.
that was your only warning, Terezi says. Her voice has a strange tonality to it, sharper and weirdly crystalline. back off or be cut down.
The only answer from the shapes is a bright flash that crashes against the door.
She shows him where and how to direct the blades, he can show her there are ten people in total, six in the front of the house, four in the back. He can also show her where the leader is, and that’s where they direct most of their attacks. They are perfectly in tune with each other, and the “tune” part is literal. Music is rising between the shifting combinations of their patterns, music that almost tells them where to go, where to face.
They can’t do this for very long. Karkat has no training, and Terezi is worn down and sick from being depressed. Karkat almost drops the sigil patterns when he senses (allies) approaching. no they’ll be waiting for you to drop your guard, she says and he holds onto the patterns.
He keeps it together until Mituna, flanked by Aradia and Sollux let’s himself into the house. “Hey,” Karkat says in greeting, then “oh, that’s why you have a key.” Then he and Terezi kind of tip over onto the floor, and the sigil patterns collapse. “Mr. Captor’s your dad?” he asks, feeling lightheaded and strange.  
“Half-dad,” Terezi mumbles. “Step-dork.”
“Love you too, honey,” Mituna says, squatting down next to both of them. “It’s complicated, says so on my Facebook and everything,” he says to Karkat, his mouth twitching at the corners. Karkat gets the sense that Mr. Captor is trying not to fall apart in front of them. He lifts both of them, with telekinesis, and then folds out the couch bed. “When I’m not so freaked out, I get dibs on screaming at you,” he tells Terezi, or maybe the both of them.
“What about m’dad?” Karkat says.
“He can yell at you next,” Mituna says.
That wasn’t at all what Karkat meant, but he was too tired to try to explain. He falls asleep, curling up next to Terezi. The last thing he thinks he hears is Aradia Megido mentioning something about pictures.
<==
==>
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calumniare-blog · 8 years ago
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>Reunion.
| Kanaya Leijon |
One foot in front of the other. Step by step by step...
You're so tired. Your shoulders slouch forward and you lean as if you were some heart broken maiden carrying the weight of your broken dreams in your ribs. 
 ... That might actually be who you are, but you don't want to actually think about how true that would be of you right now. 
 Instead, you look over to a familiar street and take a turn. Someone you remember is here. You remember him sweetly and kindly, and you had many a conversation, sharing the differences of your own worlds. You want to hear from him again and selfishly ease the weight of your journey so far. 
 You don't expect him to remember you, truthfully, but you can still hope. Maybe he'd even offer you a drink.
| Eridan Pyrope |
And of course there you are. Just like you told her a while ago that this had to be your favourite place. Even if it's not all that special, it is special to you. A simple park with a fountain in the middle. You used to love watching the water drip down, the leaves dance in the wind and listen to all the life that is sprouting all around you. You can still do part of that at least, even if it takes away a whole lot of the magic. For now you just have to get used to the new way you see things. Or well, mostly hear them. You even got some special wireless earphones handcrafted for you that take in the vibrations around you and send them to you years, so now you vaguely recognise shapes, but that's about all you can do for now. Especially getting used to it has proven to be difficult as all hell, so for now you're just sitting there and listening to the soft sounds around you to relax. 
You try not to draw any more attention to yourself than you already do with your sickeningly red eyes and so you ignore the footsteps next to you. It's probably just someone else wanting to enjoy the park anyway. And if anything happens your guard is sitting on a bench across from you, looking unsuspicious but still attentive.
| Kanaya Leijon |
It takes you a moment to find him, and when you do you have to stop yourself. When you see the familiar face of your casual acquaintence, you can't help but notice something terribly wrong with his eyes. 
 There's no way he didn't notice he's fucking blind.. So what do you do? How long had this been a thing? You bite your lip and walk towards the teal, straightening out the tattered cloth of your make-shift skirt. 
 "Hello, Eridan," you say, attempting to keep your chipper tone. "It's been a while."
| Eridan Pyrope |
It takes you a moment or two to answer the too familiar sounding voice. You've been blind for not nearly long enough to recognise voices especially not when you haven't seen them in what seems forever. But someone calling you by your first name? You should know her... 
 While you think with a soft frown your guard has time to assess the situation and remember her face luckily. If he didn't, she'd probably be dead already. 
 And finally you turn your head to the direction the voice is coming from. "Forgive me for sounding rude, but-... Who exactly is it that is talking to me?"
| Kanaya Leijon |
Oh, how your cheery smile faulters, how your eyes look at his with a quiet, empathetic pain. What had happened? Your eyes hurt just imagining the possibilities. 
 "It's me, dearest, Kanaya! The olive who tends to steal away your time during camp migrations." You have a thought to look at the guard and smile to them as well. "And a good evening to you too, I hope you're doing well."
| Eridan Pyrope |
Dahmbe, your guard, gives her a soft smile and nods in her direction as a sign to not worry about him. Fortunately you have him to help you through the first rough weeks of getting used to your... condition. 
 Your eyes visibly widen a little at the realisation and you can't help but relax; it feels relieving to finally meet someone who isn't out to stab your back. Or... maybe she is? You can never be too sure, you don't need your month to get even worse just because you had to be careless. 
 "Huh. What are you here for?" You can't help but sound suspicious, like a scared animal.
| Kanaya Leijon |
"Oh. The usual, I'm afraid. Some kind company, a place to rest my feet." You really need it. Though Eridan can't see, Dahmbe likely has noticed your ragged condition already. Clothes lightly burned, face and skin still recovering from burns, feet that are blistered and cut up from unprotected travel. A place to rest is definitely something you need right now. 
 "You wouldn't mind having me, still, would you? You look a bit..." Blind? "Beat up." Sure, let's go with that.
| Eridan Pyrope |
As usual, Dahmbe stays quiet about it and lets you take control over the conversation. He knows your pride is especially vulnerable right now and he knows better than to try and butt into business that isn't his to begin with. Would only earn him you snapping at him anyway. 
 She has seen your eyes by now you're sure; it's what everyone notices at first. You don't even need to see their faces to know they're put off by it. How their voice drowns in pity, how they suddenly become all cautious with you. You fucking hate it. 
 "Yeah that's a way to call it. Take a seat." And you slide to the side a bit to give her space to sit down next to you. "Any particular reason for you to travel this far?"
| Kanaya Leijon |
"Oh, it's spiritual business," you sigh before sitting on Eridan's other side. "As you could probably tell, it's not quite time for our usual travel to our dim seasons camp. I was just getting ready for it when I was all sorts of..." You pause, groaning a little as you search for what might be 'proper' telling. "I was all sorts of spurred into action by a spirit! A few more physical consequences finally moved me along to addressing this particular one's request! As you know, being the spiritual leader of a group of trolls really is a tiring task!" 
 As you finish, you look over Eridan again and soften your tone; it's less over compensatingly friendly and chipper and more gently concerned. "Now, how about you? I suppose there's no use mincing words in this regard, not much further at least. But I would like to know what's happened, if it's at all within your willingness to tell me."
| Eridan Pyrope |
It's apparent even your posture has changed through all these incidents that have happened not too long ago. You look on guard and maybe even weak. Definitely less confident than you used to, but you hope you'll bounce back from that soon enough. You just need time. 
 You softly frown at her question, not sure how much to tell her. You figure your friendship has lasted just because of her unknowingness regarding you and your occupation. A small sigh escapes your lips as you take a little time to think of a good answer. "Just an accident at my job. Happens sometimes." Little pause. 
 "...spirits huh? What did it tell you?" Slowly however, there's interest creeping back into you. You can't help but become all kinds of curious the second Kanaya starts talking, just like it was back when you two met for the first time.
| Kanaya Leijon |
Ah. He doesn't want to talk about it. You could imagine so, with how uncomfortable he seems, never mind the potential lingering pain in his eyes. 
 So you indulge him. 
 "Oh, it started off pretty typical, you see! An older woman this time, she seemed to already feel some sort of emotional connection to me when she spoke to me. There's someone she wants me to go and protect or something -- she wasn't terribly specific, mind you -- and insisted I leave my little village of people to go and help her find some rest. Turns out it's someone I already know, but I hadn't gotten a chance to let him know I'm heading over to his place, nor am I exactly sure where he lives right now!" 
 You huff upward, your bangs pushed upwards briefly before they slap your forehead. 
"It's not like I have much choice anyway, I'm supposed to help these restless spirits. But it would have been nice to contact him and not be so forcibly removed from home."
| Eridan Pyrope |
You're relieved when she stays at the current topic and talks about herself instead. For some reason you've always liked listening to her instead. Maybe it's because she always seems to be more worried about others than herself and that draws you to ask more about her. It excites you to say you know more about her and her culture than other people do. Most people, even. 
And you listen to her, starting to softly smile at her, because this is exactly what you needed. Just to hear from somebody else, instead of having to sit alone caged up with your own thoughts. "Yeah, I can imagine. But your duty brings you to all kinds of interesting places. Lets you meet different people too, with different views. Take as much from your trip as you can, Kanaya." 
"You think I'd be able to help you find the place you need to go? I happen to have connections and such."
| Kanaya Leijon |
"Oh, I try," you sigh again, "I really do. Between assisting the spritis, the peple of my little... cluster thing, and just about anyone who might either mock me for my beliefs or otherwise try to take something from me--" 
 You take a breath and lean back against the bench. 
"I suppose it's just difficult for me to afford myself such luxeries!" 
Eridan, this kind boy, offers to help you with finding Karkat. It'd be so nice. Maybe even something that keeps you off your messed up feet for a while, but the spirit leading you does something. You don't know what it is, exactly, but you feel her move through you. A chill goes through your head, giving you a cold nose, a headache and a dry, rough throat. She doesn't approve of him getting involved. 
"... I'm afraid not, lovely."
| Eridan Pyrope |
You give a soft nod. You can respect a No, though you can't help but still offer. "If you do end up needing my help with anything I'll be there." And with that you even take out one of your business cards. It takes a bit of fiddling, because you always used to rely so heavily on your eyes before, but you eventually make it and slide it to her. Or at least her direction. Hopefully. Being blind all of a sudden is fucking hard. 
And then you settle back into your former position after you made sure she got the card. "Yeah, I can only imagine coming from such a different society into this one must be hard. Don't give up, alright? The biggest gift you can bring into Alternia is share your knowledge and your experiences. That's what you're here for. What we're all here for, really. To communicate and share ideas." And you look off into the distance, visibly lost in your thoughts.
| Kanaya Leijon |
You smile as he quietly struggles with his pockets, his cards -- you think a few almost fall out of his pocket, the poor dear -- and he attempts to hand it to you.
Your warmer hands gently wrap around his as you gently correct his reach, thumbs caressing his palm before you take the card from him. 
"You mustn't give up, either, Eridan.... I know this whole thing must be weighing down on you something terrible. I honestly couldn't begin to imagine it --" That's a lie, you're aggressively empathetic, "-- but I know you're smart. You're a fighter! It'll be hard and you'll want to give up, but you are clever and crafty. Just... Promise to be patient with yourself. For me?"
| Eridan Pyrope |
The sudden touch makes you flinch almost, but you try your best to keep calm so you don't lose the goddamn card. Come on Eridan, you can still do this much.
You become awfully quiet at her words, just looking downwards now. She just managed to look into your soul and say exactly what you needed to hear and it takes you a bit off guard. Last time someone knew you this well was your childhood friend, but she used mind powers for that, so you hardly count that. But having someone understand you like this - without the "cheating" as you'd always call it - truly is somewhat magical to you. 
Eventually you finally give a soft nod, after everything she said has sunken in. "I'll try. I'll at least try. It's not like I really have any other choice anyway. I can't run from it and I'll have to swing back from it somehow. In the meantime I suppose I'll need a while to get used to it first."
| Kanaya Leijon |
"Naturally! As I'm sure any troll would!" You put your other hand on his as well. "As you become more aware of yourself, you'll relearn the world around you. All its smells, its sounds, its tastes and textures. Everything your sight painted for you will now be the job of the rest of you!" 
The spirit that's been guiding you grows impatient and makes your shoulder cold. You need to move it along. 
"I don't have any experience with it myself, clearly... But I've seen a few others who were blind use sticks to help them navigate! That's about all I could hope to offer, though, unfortunately." 
You stand slowly, slowly letting go of his hand. "I wish I could stay... But it seems I'm being pulled away again."
| Eridan Pyrope |
You can't help but feel comfortable when feeling her hands on yours. She has this incredible aura surrounding her and you can't decide whether it's just her personality or if it's the contact with all those spirits. Just talking to her has always felt like a magical experience and made you consider the existence of supernatural to actually be real more than you'd like to admit. Your logical brain just doesn't allow any beliefs in anything that isn't factual, but with her... It makes you want to expand your horizon. 
You give a little nod at her advice. "I'll see what I can find to help with the lack of eyesight but for now these neat little earbuds-" You point to them or. Try to point to the general direction. You're still bad at this. "Though they're hard to become accustomed to." 
As she announces having to leave you're actually a bit disappointed but it quickly swings back to being glad you saw her in the first place. Well - more or less. Your soft smile is back again. "That's alright; it was good to talk to you again. Good luck on your journey and if you need anything you know how to reach me."
| Kanaya Leijon |
Smiling, you take the card and slide it between your belts, snug as it can be on your person. "When I get the chance, I'll call you! Or. Something along those lines." 
Then you gently let go of his hand, turning to Dahmbe and smiling. "And you! Don't forget to take care of yourself some too, alright? I know you'll do your best by our Eridan, here." 
You say your goodbyes as you leave, making sure Eridan could hear your fading voice before making your way back to the streets, your feet throbbing in pain. Soon, you'll be able to rest. Soon...
Just not now.
| Eridan Pyrope |
Both you and Dahmbe smile at her as she leaves, your guard even murmurs a "Hope to see you again soon, Miss Leijon." and then he can watch you as your relaxed posture immediately disappears again. 
Experiencing the planet in a whole different way now, huh? Wish you could be this positive about it. Maybe you can be in the future, but for now it feels like a curse. Like one of the rare enjoyments you had in life got forcefully taken away from you. 
"It's getting late, Eridan." And that is enough from Dahmbe to know he noticed that you need something to distract yourself with again or you just drown in your thoughts. 
You get up with an exhausted sigh. "Yeah. Big plans are awaiting us... Especially with having to relocate the group's base." And with that you teleport back.
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clonerightsagenda · 8 years ago
Text
Most of this popped into my head way earlier this year, but I thought I’d polish it up for this update.
So here’s a double eulogy, I guess, for a character I finally came to love when I had to kill her.
“Dreambubbles can be disorienting at first,” Tavros says to a gathered crowd of ghosts. Stating the obvious is a major part of his orientation speech for new recruits.
You lean against the hull of his flagship just out of view, arms crossed. This latest batch was a team effort, same as the one before. You’re not allowed to go out on solo rescue missions yet, only to serve as bait. Apparently you’re “unreliable”, like you weren’t FLARP champion of your hiveblock with all the achievements to your name.  All the important ones, anyway.
You’ve heard the speech plenty of times, first as its victim and now as an observer. You want to jump onto the deck and shove him out of the way so you can set the record straight. “Listen up, losers. We’re not important. We’re not here for a reason, except that we messed up or someone stuck a sword through our backs. We’re dead weight, dead. Get used to it and get moving, unless you want to be dust too.”
That wouldn’t “send the right message”, though, so instead you scowl while Tavros drones on. One day. One day you’ll do it, once you’ve figured out where to go next and are ready to bail. A fitting farewell to this juvenile playacting, to remind them what real go-getters look like.
“There aren’t any obvious boundaries between one place and the next, which you might have noticed,” Tavros goes on. The Boy Skylark can win some achievements for self-evidency, anyway. “And the bubbles themselves tend to, merge together or drift apart. That’s normal. You should just expect that, um, the only thing to expect here is everything changing all the time.” You roll your eyes. Eloquent. “Even you!” he adds. “You’re not bound, to be whoever you were before you came here. Whatever that might be. Even if there are things you feel bad about, or wish you could change. If you take enough steps here, the place you’re in could change into a field, or a mountain, or a lake. There’s no reason, that if you take enough steps, you can’t change into something else too.”
Feel good wiggler crap. You’ve always hated these speeches.
#
“Why are you working with this freakshow?” Eridan asks.
Tavros assigned you to deal with him while he adjusts. You guess your not-leader figures Eridan will respond to a higher blood better, and he has the sense not to ask Feferi to grubsit. So when someone has to deliver marching orders to your newest recruit and you’re not off roaming the fringes of the Furthest Ring, that’s your job.
“I wanted revenge,” you say, tossing the map with Tavros’s latest coordinates in his direction. He doesn’t catch it. Another Eridan helped plan the fleet placements, putting that military history obsession to work, but you’re not going to tell him if he doesn’t ask. “This was a way to get it.”
“Not charging directly at the big bad and getting your ass kicked?” He scoffs, polishing a smudge only he can see off his rifle. “You have changed.”
“I’m biding my time.” You say it loftily, to suggest plans are already in motion. After all, this was supposed be a temporary arrangement, a way to regain your strength and sense of purpose. Then you’d find a new, bigger plan, a way to take English down once and for all.
It’s been sweeps. You haven’t come up with one yet.
Instead you’ve settled into whatever this existence is, a team member whose role is not being part of the team, bait for a destroyer of worlds. It’s not all bad. Gets the adrenaline pumping, for sure, which is vital in a place that lulls you into quiescence. Even though the Furthest Ring isn’t a natural home for Light players, you’ve gotten good at it. If there’s anything you’ve got a knack for, it’s adapting to places that want to kill you.
You learn how to let memories bubble up from inside you and warp your surroundings into shelter and places to hide. You learn how to leap from bubble to bubble when they’re not quite touching, bracing yourself for the chill of the Furthest Ring and the song of the horrorterrors scraping like frozen blades across your mind. You learn the fickleness of luck (winning a coin toss doesn’t matter if your sister stabs you in the back) and wrap fortune around only the outcomes you’ve thought through. It’s like one of those too-clever storybook genies, twisting your wishes, taking you at your word and leaving you scrambling to set things right. Luck must be handled with care.
English has a lot of luck to steal, at least. Everything works out in his favor in the end – that’s more than luck; it’s certainty. You can’t do much with a probability of 100%, but you can slow him down and leach off bits around the edges, making him a hair too slow and yourself just fast enough. You can dart around the margins of his story, for now.
There are moments where it’s tempting to make your successful outcome exclude you, when oblivion calls with its seductively easy way out. This place drains you. Fighting is hard. But sitting still and remembering is nearly as bad. Everyone’s haunted by their memories. Some are just lucky enough that they can’t see the ghosts.
#
The first time you try the savior gig, it doesn’t go well.
Tavros finally lets you off your leash, mostly because English is gunning for two different locations at once. The whole Time hero thing is a real pain in the ass sometimes. You navigate to a shadowy place made up of forests and deep gorges. Finding dreamers is difficult in the gloom, but eventually you draw together a crowd by tugging their attention your way, another Light trick you’ve learned.
“Hey everyone,” you say. “I’m going to be your rescuer today.”
An Aradiabot sneers. “You? You think you’re helping us?”
“Do you have a problem with that?” you demand. “Is it illegal on some notice plastered up somewhere I didn’t read?”
“It’d be unprecedented.”
Leave it to her robo-clones to hold a grudge, just because of a little bit of murder. “I’m all you’ve got, I’m afraid. Any takers?”
No one else says anything, but they don’t start moving either. What’s their problem? Can’t they see that this is important?
You coax and bully and cajole (but you don’t use mind control, not with the memory of glowing eyes and grasping hands still fresh) but they’re slow to move and there’s no time. “Fine,” you snap. “Tavros can come get you here. I’m supposed to be the bait anyway. I’ll lead English away. But if you can possibly bear it, it might be a good idea to head in the opposite direction.”
You hear later that about half of them made it out, the other half hit by a strafe of reality-shattering power before English turned to chase you through a land of flashing colors and fireflies. “We rescued ten,” Tavros says. “That’s good.”
“Good?” you repeat. You either win or you lose; there’s no half and half draw. You lost, and you lost because of you. Why didn’t they listen? You recall the disgusted curl of Aradia’s metal lips and are reminded of that brief time in Tavros’s mind, the uncomfortable sensation of looking at yourself from the outside in. No one ever seems to like what they see.
Obviously they’re not looking right. Who knows you better than yourself?
#
Other Alternian dreamers’ gazes on you feel different after that. The Beforans don’t know you, but you don’t want to run into any Araneas or Meenahs (and definitely not Kurloz) so you keep to yourself. That’s your purpose, after all. Keep English away from anyone important. Keep him focused on you.
There aren’t many humans in the bubbles. Their Time hero was careful (afraid) and kept as linear as he could. Your session was too long, too many ways to get things wrong or the wrong sort of right. Aradia needed an army to keep the Black King in check, and she got one. The many ways your species could fuck it up is splattered in bloody colors all across the Furthest Ring.
You do run into him a few times. He’s almost always living in a memory that doesn’t include you, or he knows Alternians only as messages over Pesterchum. If you step into his hive, his eyes slide right past you.
Once, though, you open a door in a land of dark landmasses and cogwheels rising out of lava that reminds you of Karkat’s, walk right into a human bedroom, and nearly jump out of your skin when he says, “Hey.”
“You know who I am?” you ask.
“I know what you are,” he says. “Don’t think we ever talked.”
“No,” you say. “Not out there or in here. None of your selves want to remember.”
“Can’t blame them.” He rubs his eyes, and you see a sliver of white from behind the shades he insists on wearing as they slide up the bridge of his nose. “My friends. Did they get out ok?”
You haven’t heard from anyone living in sweeps. Is the game over? Would you still be here if it was? “I haven’t seen many of them around,” you say. “I think they might have a chance at winning.”
“That’s good.”
You study him – the human Terezi adopted, who you’d taken quick glances at just to see why she’d waste her time on him. You still don’t get it. Except that he does a bad job of hiding himself, and she loves it when people put themselves out there for her while pretending it’s a challenge. Among the humans, his guardian seemed the best at preparing him like Alternia tried to do, but it didn’t work very well. The cracks are obvious.
Did she think yours were obvious too?
“Well, I must’ve taken a wrong turn,” you say, and turn to go. You get your mind right before you twist the knob of the door you just came through, and it opens this time onto the Land of Little Cubes and Tea.
“Nice trick,” he says.
“You can join up, if you want,” you say over your shoulder. “We’re collecting.”
“Nah.” He retreats to his desk, opening a copy of Pesterchum where every contact is stuck on idle. “I did my part. Leave me to play my shitty video games in peace until the Incredible Hulk ushers me past the great beyond.”
#
You send a message to Aradia, since she’s the one who ministers to lost souls brooding forever in their personal memory-holes. She’s good at it, too. “How did you turn into such an expert therapist?” you ask her once, while taking a breather atop a floating lily pad. The last narrow escape involved crawling through clinging vines, and the grasping tendrils ruined your braids. You disentangle your uneven attempt at fixing them and start over. “I don’t remember that being in your skillset.”
“I wasn’t an expert, not at first.” She waves her latest convert away and then plucks at one of your clumsy plaits. “Here, let me.” You flinch – when was the last time someone touched you? – and she clicks her tongue. “You’ve got a knot here. I’ll have to tug. Think you’re tough enough?”
“Sure,” you say, and try to relax like this is normal, like the last person who did this sweeps ago didn’t go up in smoke.
“That’s not the first Latula I’ve talked to,” she says as she works. “Or even the tenth. They have different memories, but a lot of the pain underneath is the same. Eventually you learn the right things to say, even if it’s by trial and error. It’s not hard to sound wise then.”
You remember her kneeling down as you lay sprawled on white sands and wishing your second life was over. “You don’t have that practice with me.”
“No. But it wasn’t hard to guess that you’d want to do something, after what had happened. Beyond that, you’re right. I don’t know what you’re afraid of, or your regrets. But I’m not sure you do either. Besides…” She ties off one braid and moves to the next, easing apart the strands and smoothing them out. “A lot of the dreamers are here because of me. It’s not my fault, entirely, but I still made them. Shouldn’t I make sure they’re happy, as much as they can be?”
Causality tangles you up sometimes, like the twisted corpses of your lusus’s victims dangling like sad party favors from her webs. How much can you say is yours, in a multiverse where so much is foretold? You contacted the humans because of their Jack. Their Jack was able to enter your session because of you. Which comes first? Whose fault is it? Does it matter?
“Do you think I did bad things?” you ask.
“Yes,” she says.
You’re stung by her tone more than anything else, how her fingers don’t even hesitate at their work. “But I didn’t mean to. And there were extenuating circumstances for basically everything. I could list them off. Extenuation after extenuation, like you wouldn’t believe.”
“You didn’t ask me if I thought you had reasons for what you did,” she says, exchanging a smile with a far-off Porrim. “You asked me if you did it.”
There’s not much you can say to that. There usually isn’t.
#
Sometimes you spend some time with the others, before your Light hero aura draws English in too close and you have to leave again. Ghosts come and go, but the group from your timeline has become tight-knit, and sometimes they loosen the weave enough to let you in.
“Vriska!” Nepeta calls. “It’s been sweeps.”
Nepeta has taken to the bubbles well, rubbing shoulders effortlessly with her hordes of alternates, swapping stories and giggling like it’s not uncanny at all. Wherever she is, Feferi is never far behind. You spot her now a little ways back, signing with a Meulin. She picked up Beforan Sign Language fast, saying it would’ve been helpful for working underwater. All of you know the simpler words and use them to communicate in close quarters when danger is too present for speech. You learned “help” first, fist on palm, thumb up, variations in meaning based on the motion of your hands. I help you. You help me. We help each other.
You can’t follow what they’re saying now, but you do catch the sign they’ve created for Lord English: “E” hands held cupping the eyes like the hollow eye sockets of a skull. At least that’s what it’s supposed to look like. It makes you think of people covering their faces in fear, but that’s the kind of thing you’re not supposed to point out. Bad for morale. Like telling people that you’ve been all over the Furthest Ring, and there’s a lot less of it than there used to be.
“Have you heard about our plan?” Nepeta asks, as Feferi jogs over to join her.
“Plan?”
“We’re not supposed to spill the details yet, remember?” Feferi nudges her with her elbow and grins, showing off rows of shark teeth. The sight reminds you of Meenah’s sharp smile, and you swallow. “We have to make sure it works first. Then we’ll tell everyone.”
“A few more practice rounds would be a good idea. Do you think you can talk Sollux into helping out again?”
“He’ll be grumpy about it, but I’ll try.” Feferi waves at you and sprints off again. She’s animated for a dreamer, but then most people who stay close to Tavros are. Dreamers you have to harangue to even make them look your way perk up at the sight of him, soaking up his assurances that they matter, that they can still grow and change and do things, like Kanaya soaked up sunlight. Is this what the Summoner or Karkat’s ancestor were like, all those sweeps ago? No wonder the Empress wanted both of them dead.
Nepeta’s as cheerful as she always was, but her time here has given her an inner stability you lack. She settles beside you. “I like your bracelets.”
You twist the smooth bands around your wrist. Some of Meenah’s fashion sense stayed; you weren’t copying it all just so she’d like you more. Maybe Alternians as a rule thought fashion was stupid, but Alternians weren’t right about everything. “Thanks. I like your vest.” It must be new, but the cloth is already as ragged as the rest of her clothes. Even when she’s not prowling through jungles, her hands are busy plucking at loose threads or picking at gaps in the weave.
She taps what looks like one of many scales studding the fabric. “I got it from another me. She liked my coat, so we traded. It’s fun to change occasionally.”
You tug at your hair – in a ponytail today – and wonder if she means to tease. “You don’t think it’s weird, meeting other versions of yourself?”
“Why would it be? It’s nice, seeing all the different things I’ve done, like living a million lifetimes with a million possibilities. Of course, not all of them are as lively as us. But they can teach us things.” She nods over at Feferi. “Learning about her other self on Beforus helped her see the problems in her ideas of reform. Although knowing us lowbloods alone might’ve done the trick! Sometimes you need another perspective to navigate, like our maps where you need a bunch of coordinates to know where to go.”
You and Tavros haven’t spoken again about your brief time in each other’s minds. Sollux and Eridan pretend it never happened. Feferi and Nepeta are the only two who emerged without unease, although Feferi does joke that it helps to have four hands again. What would it be like, to not mind someone seeing you that closely? “Are you two matesprits?” you ask.
She blushes olive and punches you on the shoulder. “Don’t be nosy!”
“Fiiiiiiiine. I thought you liked that kind of gossip.”
“It’s different when it’s about you.” The blush hasn’t left her cheeks.
“I won’t pry then. But if you need me to find you some chalk in a memory to update your shipping wall, let me know. I find lots of great loot out there.” You turn out your empty pockets for her inspection. “I’ll have to bring back presents next time. We can have a late perigree’s eve party. Or early. I can’t keep track, but we’ve probably missed a hundred or so.”
“I’d like a celebration. Even if it’s a ‘we survived this long’ party.” Nepeta digs her nails under the edge of another scale on her vest. “Sometimes I forget you’re from our timeline,” she says frankly. “You’re a lot nicer now.”
You stuff your pockets back in your pants, unsure of how to respond. “Thanks?”
“Sorry if that was rude.” She sneaks a look over at you from underneath her bangs. “I meant it as a compliment.”
“There’s not much of a standard of comparison. There aren’t any other mes out there.”
“Even if you can’t see them walking around, you can meet the versions of yourself that you used to be.” She taps her chest. “They’re all still right here.”
“I’m not looking for enlightenment in your rumblespheres,” you say, and she snorts so loud you start laughing too.
#
Sollux approaches you not long after. You’re not sure if he’s half dead again now that Eridan’s back. He doesn’t like to be asked. His lisp is still gone, replaced by the hollow tones you remember from Aradia’s post-death days. “I still don’t trust you,” he says.
“Hello to you too.”
He ignores you. “AA thinks it’s not her place to judge, and Nepeta and Feferi always look for the best in people. But me? I remember what you made me do. You liked it.”
He’s right. Oh, Scratch helped talk you into things, but the sick twists on top? Those were yours. Making Tavros fly off a cliff like Pupa Pan, sending Sollux to kill Aradia for you – you prided yourself on getting people where it hurt them most. It showed you were clever, someone not to be messed with. You’d meant to leave an impression. Looks like you succeeded.
“I’ve kept you safe here,” you say.
“And I want to know why. You never do anything if there isn’t something in it for you.”
You hug your knees. “Eridan asked the same thing.” Maybe that’ll put him off.
“I hate the bastard, but he’s got a point.”
“I want English to suffer,” you say, because it’s the truth. And to your surprise, the next bit is too. “And I want to be better than him.”
He scowls. “At least he’s impersonal about killing us.”
Did he come out here to insult you? Look at yourself from another perspective, Nepeta said, so you try. It’s tricky, but so is shuffling through a life and death’s worth of memories and dragging them out into the world. Mental acrobatics keep you safe these days. What memories would he have of you?
Vriska Serket, Mindfang wannabe and power gamer extraordinaire, always ready to leave her team without their strongest player in the middle of a melee if it meant netting more xp or the choicest treasure. One time you deliberately stepped on an alarmed panel to summon an emerald basilisk for its drops, even though no one else near you had the levels to deal with it. You’d only laughed when it plowed through them and nearly reduced Tavros’ gel viscosity to zero. Even on Alternia, land of a bunch of rowdy wigglers with no self-control, you’d built a reputation as someone who left broken people and broken things in her wake. Now you’re all trapped in a shrinking space with a killer who’s got your scent. You may be the expendable one, the distraction, but you have the power to kill them all just by sitting still. No wonder he’s worried.
“I’m not planning anything,” you say. “No scheme that’ll blow up in my face, no duplicitous double crosses. You don’t have to worry about me, I promise.”
“And I’m supposed to believe you, just like that?”
“Tavros trusts me.”
He snorts. “He’s an optimist. But I’ll believe him more than anything you tell me.”
You look up at the cracking void, at all the damage English has left behind that the rest of you could never fix, not in a million sweeps. “That’s probably for the best.”
#
Time doesn’t pass the same way here. You’re old, so old, but you can’t age, and so you never grow out of ancient hurts or childish arguments. Those things keep most of the dead chained down reliving their petty problems until English blasts them to smithereens. That works in the gods’ favor. Maybe the dead are happier that way too; you don’t know.
You try to avoid Terezis. You’ve never seen the one from your timeline. She’d be older now; you don’t know by how much. You haven’t seen another you out here either. God Tiering so early, most of them probably faded in doomed timelines. The ones who died would have been easy prey for English’s rampage. You don’t want to talk to these fellow sisterless members of Team Scourge. You’re not looking for each other.
One does talk to you, though, when you’re shepherding people into a cave that turns into paneled meteor hallways that turn into a beach where Tavros’ ship is waiting. She’s lingering behind, and English nearly catches you. The first memory that springs to mind as a hiding place is your old clubhouse deep in the Alternian forest. You both squeeze inside the structure of fallen branches and propped up boards, and she runs her fingers over a curling Mindfang drawing. Sheesh, you were embarrassing. Can she see it? You don’t know if death has restored her eyesight. Her eyes are white now, just like yours.
“Sorry for the crummy accommodations,” you say. “I don’t want to lead him after the others, so we’ll lie low for a while and then jump somewhere else.”
“It’s fine,” she says, hunkering down on a locked treasure chest. “I haven’t been here in a long time.”
“Brings back memories, huh?” You look up, where light filters through the cracking roof. The two of you share this part of your past, at least.
“Lots.”
“What happened to you?” you ask, cautiously. With the way timelines work, you’re not sure whether the Terezi who would’ve died if you’d gone after Jack exists as a dreamer or only as a possibility. One day you’re afraid you’ll run into one who’s here because of you.
She sighs, digging her fingers into the seams between the planks of the treasure chest. “Most of us died fighting the Black King. Feferi’s lusus getting prototyped was a big mistake. Aradia reversed, of course, but… a psychic blast isn’t Heroic or Just, and you must’ve come back before she doomed the timeline, so you didn’t show up here.”
“I’ve never met another me,” you say. “Probably for the best. We’d get into fights. Too many strong personalities; you know how it is. I’m always right, obviously, but what happens if I disagree?”
She snickers at that, like you’d hoped. It’s been a long time since you’ve heard her laugh. No one else has one like it. “I was worried about her. We’d never completely patched things over after FLARP, and she was always so reckless. We were supposed to be in charge of a whole world once we won. I didn’t know if you could handle that. I’m glad I met you, even if you’re not her. It’s nice to know you turned out alright.”
“That’s me,” you say. “Turned out great.” And then, to change the subject, you add, “We kind of won. But something happened, right at the end, so we never got to rule over the humans we made. You’re right, though. We would have messed it up.”
“So you won. How did you die?” she asks.
“I made a mistake,” you tell her. “That’s all.”
You could have kissed this one, maybe, a replay of the one time you’d bumped noses and clicked teeth in the real version of this clubhouse and then never spoken of it again. But you don’t. You want the Terezi who knows everything, the truly colossal magnitude of your mistakes, to look at you now and say she’s glad you turned out alright.
#
“They call me the Salvager?” Tavros asks.
You’re sitting on the edge of the flagship after a successful retrieval. You still ask before dropping by, even after all these sweeps. At first it was annoying. Did he want you to wear a collar with a bell? Now, after seeing the doubt in others’ eyes when you come to their aid, you understand a little better. Continuing to ask permission is a peace offering. He’s never said no.
“That’s right, boss.” It’s a joke, but you don’t load the term with irony like you used to. “Someone picking up the garbage.” You wave away his affronted expression. “Metaphorical garbage. Providing succor to lost souls, if you like that better.”
“So it’s a good thing, then.”
“Usually. Some people think you’re in league with English, since you show up with him right ahead of you or right behind. I straighten them out.”
“And they listen to you?”
You shrug. “I’m getting well known too.”
“Do they call you anything?”
“Not as far as I know. They say you must be lucky, and that’s all thanks to me, so maybe that should be my title. Fortun8.” You count. “Nope, only seven letters. We can’t go breaking long established patterns, not at our age.”
“Do you think you’re lucky?”
You flick a splinter of dream-wood off into the sand. “Luck is a tricky thing. It’s not always what you think it is. Maybe it’s unlucky to die, but… I don’t know what I’d be like if I hadn’t. I don’t know if I ever would’ve stopped running into trouble and getting people hurt. So maybe things worked out ok.”
He nods. “They did for me. I’m not saying what you did to me wasn’t bad, because it was, but. It could’ve ended worse.”
“Yeah,” you say, “it could’ve.”
#
The next time you serve as anything more than bait, you arrive in a bubble that mixes the spires of Prospit with the craggy cliffs you recognize from home. Most of the trolls you see are Beforan, a crew you mostly avoid to dodge the drama. And you thought your teammates were obnoxious. An Aranea looks your way, but you don’t meet her eyes. The last thing you need is her “learning” from you again. John has come and gone, bearing news of his session’s near-disaster. You know what your brief stint at role-modeling cost.
“Listen up, everyone,” you call. “This is important.”
“I remember you,” Karkat’s ancestor says. Great, are you in for one of his speeches? “You wanted us to listen before. You stole our minds.”
The army feels like a lifetime ago. That version of you died with Meenah and Aranea. So many versions of you have died. But he doesn’t know that. There’s a crowd of spirits looking at you with a mix of confusion and suspicion. There’s a killer Lord of Time on his way, and there are a few minutes for you to make this count. What will make them trust you? What will make you trust yourself?
You take a breath and look at yourself from the outside in.
Who is Vriska Serket? Your past is checkered like the Battlefield with versions of yourself created for survival or approval, emulation or redemption. What you neglected to ask Nepeta was how to tell which one was really you. You can imagine her laughing and pointing to herself again, saying “This one, silly. And all the others. I’m me.”
Maybe there’s something that’s truly you, a core to your soul that persists between timelines. Maybe you’re something you make, piece by piece and day by day. Maybe you’re made by other people, what they see and what they think. You can’t control that. All you can control is what you do.
So you don’t say it wasn’t your fault, or it’s all in the past, or it could’ve been a whole lot worse. You say, “I’m sorry.” You say, “This time, I’m here to help.”
And this time, they listen.
#
On your own again, you watch paradox space crack and shatter around you. The death of multiverses puts on a display to put anyone else’s light show to shame. English is like you, the ultimate power gamer, smashing his way to a high score, uncaring of everyone crushed along the way. You can only ever stay a step ahead of him, only barely keep the damage under control. Maybe you think that’s enough, repurposing your luck, making a billion wishes to undo the damage the first ones caused. One day you’ll have to stop running, turn around, and look him in the eye. But beating him won’t redeem you. Another you learns this, dueling Jack not in a blaze of glory but with corpses at your feet and hatred in your heart. A possibility, a lesson you never got to learn.
That’s your whole existence, teetering on the brink of revelation, balanced on a knife’s edge between hero and villain, afraid to drop off because you don’t know where you’ll land. Skaia tells you that narrow space in-between is how you stay alive, after all. Who would you be if you’d ever stopped running? Would you be you?
Behind you, Lord English tears his way through space, smashing reality into splinters and shards. The bubble you’re in breaks off at your feet to make a cliff opening out into nothingness. Far below you, you can see another bubble, pearly-white and almost as small.
One day you’ll turn around and face him. One day your past will catch up with your present, and both of them will be over. But not today.
“Catch me if you can,” you say, and jump.
24 notes · View notes
2-point-5 · 5 years ago
Text
this got two likes so:
tw: murder and school shooting
vriska still has powers, you'll see why.
they're all in junior year of high school.
this huge company called skaiatech was launching a new project, and all four of the kids just moved in
about a week into the school year, aradia gets shot in the head.
everyone thinks it was sollux, her boyfriend.
tavros (her brother) says he knows who did, but immediately after calling the police and saying he's going down to the station he "jumps out of a window" and ends up dying in the hospital.
terezi, john, dave and karkat start trying to solve the mystery.
they interview everyone, but only find out that fef is crushing big on sollux, and eridan is absolutely in love with her. also, that no one likes gamzee.
it's kinda hard to make progress, because terezi is blind (she has a service dog tho), john is easily distracted, and dave and karkat refuse to get along.
finally, terezi finds a clue that points to vriska (her best friend) and she absolutely falls apart.
after school she confronts vriska, and it ends up with a huge face-off.
vriska admits that she has powers, which she used to force sollux to kill aradia, and the only people she can't control are terezi and the new kids.
terezi shoves her down a flight of stairs, and she passes out.
in the library, dave and john are finishing up some research. they're leaving when gamzee stops them to say hi.
daves pissed off and roasts the hell out of gamzee.
gamzee is kinda upset, but then he runs into equius, who starts telling him what a dissapointment he is and telling him he could do so much better.
gamzee snaps, and grabs equius's dog tags, pulling them tighter and tighter, accidentally killing him.
nepeta walks in and freaks out, grabbing a pair of scissors and slashing at him.
he beats her to death.
when he realizes what he did, he takes equius glasses and nepeta's hat and gets the hell out of there.
they never see him again.
meanwhile, karkat is double checking the computer room for any hints. kanaya and sollux are working on projects, and feferi is talking to/flirting with sollux.
eridan bursts in and starts arguing with feferi. sollux tells him to fuck off, and eridan pulls out a gun, shooting both of them.
kanaya charges at him, but he shoots her too.
karkat is hiding under a desk at this point, but he comes out when he hears eridan leave.
he calls the ambulance, and locks the door in case eridan comes back.
the police come. the absolute shock of having three fucked up murders plus three almost deaths in one night is a huge shock for the town.
john does some more investigation and figures out that skaiatech was emitting an odd signal/ frequency. he, dave, rose, and jade hadn't been exposed to it for long, and terezi was somehow immune, but everyone else in town was connected, making them really happy and placid.
vriska had tapped into the frequency and could control anyone.
gamzee and eridan had accidentally gotten backwash, all the darkness and fury the town muffled for the other residents getting funnelled into their minds.
john, dave, terezi and karkat expose the company, and it gets shut down.
it's kinda a happy ending, except, y'know. a lot of people die.
might fuck around and make an entire humanstuck au.
20 notes · View notes
amicicidalgambler · 8 years ago
Text
> Acquire random dokis.
afflatedcazadora
god one highblood lifespan s33ms too much how do yall DEAL
amicicidalgambler
I wouldn't know, I'm not dealing.
A lot of it seems to 8e violence or art, though.Or 8oth.
afflatedcazadora
......much more relatable than im comfortable with LOL
amicicidalgambler
You're not anywhere near as 8ad as what I'm talking a8out.
I have no idea how high8loods on your planet survive, though.
afflatedcazadora
i dunno :OO by being snooty????
eridans younger than me so he cant say
amicicidalgambler
All high8loods are snooty. 8y my account all of yours should 8e 8atshit insane.
afflatedcazadora
i mean he has aggressive tendencies but thats what im here for???
so he can get em out with someone who agr33s to it :00
amicicidalgambler
I killed most of my kismesises so I guess that says something a8out my "aggressive tendencies."
afflatedcazadora
fkgdfkjh vriska n o
amicicidalgambler
Vriska yes.
afflatedcazadora
no!!!!!
amicicidalgambler
It was fuuuuuuuun.
afflatedcazadora
listen you know im ok with casual murder but if you kill your kismesis theres a pawblem with the relationship!!!
amicicidalgambler
Well there isn't a paw8lem anymore if they're dead.
afflatedcazadora
vris k a
amicicidalgambler
And some of them were self defense.
afflatedcazadora
thats diffurent!!
amicicidalgambler
And one of them I'm going to argue was very romantic.
Two of them, actually.
afflatedcazadora
how so????
amicicidalgambler
I mean one of them was killed during a dinner d8.
afflatedcazadora
by you though?????
amicicidalgambler
Yeah.
Got in a fight over her trying to 8etray me.
afflatedcazadora
yikes :((
amicicidalgambler
No, stop that.It was fun.
afflatedcazadora
thats not a healthy pitch date vriska
amicicidalgambler
It doesn't need to 8e healthy to 8e a good one.
afflatedcazadora
...no it really does
amicicidalgambler
Aw come on.
It was *fun*.
afflatedcazadora
its not good!!!
amicicidalgambler
And?
afflatedcazadora
i dont know!! XOO its not my pawsition to tell you what to do about it but im clawncerned!!
amicicidalgambler
Why are you clawncerned?
afflatedcazadora
its not a good pattern to get into
amicicidalgambler
Well that ship has already sailed.
afflatedcazadora
X((
amicicidalgambler
Look, I have two quadm8s right now that I've kept alive for almost half a sweep, that's the 8est I've done since I was six sweeps.
afflatedcazadora
and thats great!!!! just
k33p it that way please??
amicicidalgambler
I definitely won't kill Nadaya, and I don't even know how Mak's mortality works.
As much as he'd pro8a8ly like that to 8e his way of going out when the time comes.
afflatedcazadora
oh my god
amicicidalgambler
He's a clown. Intim8 ritual style murder sounds like something he'd appreci8.
afflatedcazadora
hhhhhh i guess
amicicidalgambler
> That is not something you need to daydream about while talking to Nepeta, stop that.
Alright alright, I'll stop.8ut still, my track record is improving a little.
afflatedcazadora
>V RI S KA
yeah it is!!
amicicidalgambler
If I get a moirail on top of this though that means it's the end of the world.
afflatedcazadora
i dunno getting you one might be good fur you :PP
amicicidalgambler
I haven't had one since I was six sweeps.
afflatedcazadora
and thats ok!!
just sometimes stabby people benefit from someone there to help :pp
amicicidalgambler
I think I've only 8een interested in one person since. And so I've heard.
afflatedcazadora
ooh ooh who is it
amicicidalgambler
::::P
Old flarp partner.
afflatedcazadora
oooooooh?? :33c
amicicidalgambler
She was a purple8lood, part of the church. She thought it was important to the gods to give help and violence in equal measure or whatever, 8ut she was only good at the second one. Since I was one of her main partners while we were part of the same guild, I got a lot of her attempts at the first.
afflatedcazadora
ohhhh boy
amicicidalgambler
She wanted to fuss over people she just didn't know how.
afflatedcazadora
i mean its kind of sw33t but at the same time im not sure another violent purrson would be the best pale match fur you :pp
amicicidalgambler
I don't get along with non-violent people.
afflatedcazadora
wonder why :PP
amicicidalgambler
There aren't even that many of them in the first place.
afflatedcazadora
there are plenty!!
amicicidalgambler
Name three that aren't a Zahhak or a Vantas.
afflatedcazadora
felides mom!!!
um
fuck
amicicidalgambler
Exactly.
afflatedcazadora
listen just beclaws i dont know them doesnt mean theyre not there
amicicidalgambler
That's not who I'd want as a moirail, though.
afflatedcazadora
i guess...
amicicidalgambler
It doesn't even sound that appealing in the first place.
I already get more than enough attention.
afflatedcazadora
yeah?? :33c
amicicidalgambler
Yeah ::::P
afflatedcazadora
shaaaaaare
amicicidalgambler
Share whaaaaaaaat.
afflatedcazadora
who is it
amicicidalgambler
Who's what.
afflatedcazadora
i thought you meant you were getting pale attention and im here fur the gossip!!!!
amicicidalgambler
No, I meant I get more than enough attention from my quadm8s.
afflatedcazadora
oh!!
amicicidalgambler
A moirail as affection8 as Nadaya would 8e way too much, and I don't think one that 8arely sees me is what you had in mind.
afflatedcazadora
mm...
i thought you werent into all the romantic shit tho
:33c
amicicidalgambler
Put that paw 8ack down.
What do you mean?
afflatedcazadora
:33c no
you said he was really affectionate and its supurr adorable
amicicidalgambler
Listen.
afflatedcazadora
oh im all ears
amicicidalgambler
First of all Nadaya is affection8 with almost anyone.
Second of all
afflatedcazadora
second??? :33c
amicicidalgambler
God.
It's so much more than that.
afflatedcazadora
uh huh??
amicicidalgambler
It's also stupid though. You wouldn't want to hear it.
afflatedcazadora
i 33333333% want to hear it
amicicidalgambler
Fiiiiiiiine.
afflatedcazadora
i counted 8 3s fur you and efurrything
amicicidalgambler
Fine!
I just
Eugh
I don't think I've loved anyone else.
Only him.
afflatedcazadora
ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh my godthats so cute kJSHfdjhhr
im gonna cry
amicicidalgambler
It's so *much* though.
afflatedcazadora
thats what being in love is all about!!!!! X33
amicicidalgambler
It wasn't even pleasant at first.
afflatedcazadora
ofurwhelming?
amicicidalgambler
Yeah.
Almost painful.
afflatedcazadora
yeahhhh
amicicidalgambler
I'm literally not made for this.
afflatedcazadora
youll be ok!!!
amicicidalgambler
It makes everything too complic8ed.
afflatedcazadora
how come???
amicicidalgambler
Do you really want to hear?
afflatedcazadora
mmhmm!!
amicicidalgambler
> This is...starting to feel slightly gay to you.
I mean. I don't know. I know I love Nadaya and it's not like what I've felt towards anyone else I've had in a quadrant, 8ut I don't know what those feelings are.
afflatedcazadora
you mean youre flipping on him or you dont know what you felt fur anyone else??
amicicidalgambler
The second one.
I don't think of them as not quadm8s 8ut I don't think it's love either.
afflatedcazadora
hmm
that is a tricky one
amicicidalgambler
Or at least that's what I usually think.
afflatedcazadora
i mean if efurryones ok with it then it should be ok
amicicidalgambler
Yeah. 8ut it 8others me.
May8e I'm over thinking it and it is love and Karkat's powers couldn't see everything.
afflatedcazadora
what pawers???
amicicidalgambler
Godtier powers. He can see rel8ionships 8etween people as strings.
I let him use me to practice changing them and he said anything romantic didn't look normal.
afflatedcazadora
thats so fucking cool im like incredibly jealous
but idk you could be right he might not know efurrything!
amicicidalgambler
It's all stupid.
afflatedcazadora
its not!!
amicicidalgambler
It is!!!!!!!!
I can't even decide if I agree with him or not.
afflatedcazadora
its not stupid its your life!!!
afflatedcazadora
and you can take your time, he doesnt get to define anything fur you >:00
amicicidalgambler
My life is generally stupid!
afflatedcazadora
it is NOT
amicicidalgambler
It is!!!!!!!!
afflatedcazadora
>:OO
amicicidalgambler
>::::o
afflatedcazadora
its furry impurrtant!!!
amicicidalgambler
What's furry impurrtant!
afflatedcazadora
your life!!!!!
amicicidalgambler
Well DUH 8ut it's also stupid!
afflatedcazadora
nuh uh!!!!!!
amicicidalgambler
Something can 8e important AND stupid!!!!!!!!
afflatedcazadora
maybe but not this!!!!
amicicidalgambler
It's DUM8 I'm a MUTANT without FEELINGS.
Mutants usually have the feelings department more than covered.
afflatedcazadora
im sorry X(( do you want me to go get nadaya??
amicicidalgambler
No I'm just ram8ling.
Sorry.
I'm not actually upset.
afflatedcazadora
you sure?
amicicidalgambler
Yeah.
I'm not good at self depric8ing jokes. Or honesty.
8ut I'm not upset.
afflatedcazadora
you are good at them this one was just a rare miss XPP
amicicidalgambler
::::P
8ut really, if anything I feel 8etter.
afflatedcazadora
:DD !!
amicicidalgambler
I haven't exactly gotten to talk a8out that.
afflatedcazadora
!
im honored :OO
amicicidalgambler
Pfht8thf8thfhth8.
6 notes · View notes
testifytime2-blog · 8 years ago
Note
ples, tell me about eridan
You opened a can of worms this day friend. Though again pls this is just why I love the character take everything I say with a grain of salt cus I’m rambling.
I love Eridan. I really do! I think a lot of the reason I love him is also the reason he frustrates me.
So we have this boy, this dorky little fish boy. He’s young and he’s royalty, and he’s also got some serious identity issues. This, to me, is what drew me in to Eridan. He is full of contradictions, trying to portray himself as the high class, well bred highblood he thinks he needs to be - like his ancestor, or all the highbloods in his history books who he actually says he models himself after - even though he actually doesn’t feel or think like that at all - the fact that he never uses any of his doomsday devices, which Feferi correctly interprets as him not actually wanting to hurt his friends, but rather him struggling with what he thinks he needs to be verses how he actually is.
At his core, Eridan is… actually a sweet guy. He loves magic, but has had that love beaten out of him - by his friends who put him down about it, maybe, which has put him in a state of denial, where he still loves magic but also refuses to believe in it because everyone else doesn’t - and he seems to genuinely care about his friends and their welbeing - case in point, he starts off as an arrogant highblood in a conversation with Gamzee, but quickly cuts it out and asks if Karkat’s okay when he’s told that Sollux has died. He’s just layering himself and layering himself with these pretty toxic personas because of these societal expectations he thinks he needs to stand up to, even though he’s told he doesn’t (which, again, is something I personally understand and sympathise with). 
I love him because he is this complex character, but he also frustrates me because he is so complex. For instance? Feferi was always going to be a shit moirail for him. Not a bad moirail in general, but for him specifically. She only ever dealt with the surface issues - the theatrics of the day, the things he said and posed at that specific point in time - but never with the deeper issues - the insecurities he has about his place as a highblood, the insecurities about the expectations he has for himself and he assumes he has to live up to, the fact that he tries to abide by what a good seadweller should be based on old, musty books, and doesn’t try to be more like himself; which is someone people might actually like. And he never helped himself with this. At no point does Eridan really bring up these issues with her; he’s more than content for her to deal with the surface issues (I’m assuming because he doesn’t actually see her as a moirail considering his red feelings for her), and that is one of the biggest reasons their relationship fails. Feferi never sees the deeper parts she needs to try and help with, and Eridan never opens himself up enough for her to deal with them. 
Also? Something that gets me about him? He never intentionally hurts anyone while he’s not under some sort of influence. Case in point? Sollux’s injury and Kanaya and Feferi’s deaths. Eridan asks to be her friend - not her lover! He openly says that he’s okay just being friends, even if he wishes they could be more - and she rejects him because she is of the high and mighty opinion that he just wants back in her quads. When he mentions that he’s lost Hope - which, he’s a Prince of Hope, this is actually a big factor as to why he’s lost hope, I think; if we take anything from Dirk, who actively, but not intentionally, destroys his relationships, we can say the same for Eridan in destroying every last hope he has unintentionally - and wants to join Noir, because he is a scared 13 year old facing death who wants to live, he is attacked. Feferi literally sets Sollux on him. Sollux is hurt because Eridan uses a weapon he has never used before, which was made for him by Kanaya, which ends up being more overpowered than anyone expected. He then goes grimdark. He only attacks Feferi when she attacks him first, and kills her because, again, overpowered weapon while grimdark. And then he destroys the matriorb - not Kanaya! He does not attack Kanaya until she attacks him first. He shouldn’t have done this, and I can fully accept that, because destroying the matriorb was a dick thing to do, and he could have very much avoided all other confrontation (at the expense of Kanaya not becoming a rainbowdrinker, which is maybe why he was forced to go grimdark in the first place) but like. The wand Kayana gave him was all he had on hand? What was he supposed to do, let her kill him? Of course, I’m guessing everyone attacked in this scenario because they were all stressed and on edge and this was just the tipping point to a bunch of very scared kids in a traumatic situation not knowing how to handle anything. There was a lot of stuff all around there that could have been handled much better - Eridan getting some sort of support (which he kinda gets from Karkat! I wish this had happened more and been more developed honestly. They seemed like they could have been good moirails) would have been a good first step. Anyway, he then leaves, without killing Karkat, because Karkat doesn’t try to attack him. Of course this is because Karkat is sort of shocked and scared shitless, but it does show that Eridan only attacks when he’s attacked first. This is why I feel for Eridan, or at least why I sympathise with him. Cus he does shit in self defence, with an overpowered weapon he should never have been given, and he’s later made to apologise in canon. For what?? He was attacked first! He was under a very powerful influence! He could have just been talked down from the idea, not attacked. Feferi has that power over him. But she didn’t, because everyones’ tensions were running too high. And just. Eridan deserved better, you know? 
Eridan is a dumb boy who really, really just needed someone to tell him “look, the way you’re handling things isn’t good or right. You need to stop, take a breath, and actually assess what you’re doing. Is this who you are, who you want to be? No? Then stop.” I think maybe I love, connect, and defend him so much because I can see a lot of myself in him. Especially that last part. That last part? That’s every time I’ve gotten into an argument and lashed out because someone went for me first, but I’ve been the one blamed for it. Only in his case it’s pumped up to the max. He’s got a lot of issues, but I think maybe why I love him is because… if those issues had been solved, if he’d been put in a good paleship where he actively tries to help himself or had someone who pressed to make him see his faults or the issues in his thinking, he would have been a good and probably lovable character. Just a bit of a dunderhead, maybe, with a bit of a pride issue, and a lot of narcissism.  
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a-panda-reads-act-omega · 8 years ago
Text
ACT OMEGA PART 1
THE 10/09/16 UPDATE
Alright, considering this update is nothing more than a curtain, I guess I’ll just try to do a bit of a re-cap for everything that’s going on at the end of Homestuck. I’ve already read up to the most recent update (12/05/17), so nothing here will be blind yet. ANYWAYS, I guess I’ll make a cut.
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THE END
Ok! So, exactly where we left off at the end of Homestuck. Nothing new to liveblog about, other than the fact that the narration is a filthy liar. Like I said, this will just serve as a re-cap of everybody’s positions.
JOHN:
So, John is currently at the lilypad end-game thingy. Perfectly alive and not injured. He had his reunion with DAD after defeating The Condesce. Not much to say on him otherwise.
ROSE:
Rose is also on the lilypad thingy after defeating The Condesce. Again, not much to re-cap.
DAVE:
Dave is on the lilypad, after pulling off this HUGE SHOCKING 3x DECAPITATION COMBO! And killed off Dirky Dirk in the process. BUUT, Dirk’s alive due to Jane. That was probably a really emotional moment for Dave, which he will most likely just not speak of due to him being a butt who always puts on this cool ironic guy facade. Though I’m curious if it’s gonna have a positive effect on him or a negative one. 
JADE:
Not too much to recap for her! She’s on the lilypad with everybody else after her big battle with Jack Noir and PM. In which she was punched in the face, and didn’t exactly finish it. She has the new earth I believe. OH! And the green sun was destroyed by the other Calliope, who I will now be calling DeadTier!Calliope out of convenience, and I’m curious as to how this is gonna affect Jade’s first guardian powers. Or just her in general! The effects could end up being horrible on her. Or maybe she’ll just lose them first guardian powers. OR MAYBE she’ll just end up keeping them for some strange unexplained reason. We’ll see.
KARKAT:
So the crab boy is on the lilypad after his underwhelming fight with Clover. There’s a lot I’m curious about after that fight. More specifically, how Karkat feels after that fight. Is he going to be disappointed or proud of himself? It’s possible he won’t care, but Karkat usually takes his performance very seriously when it comes to his self-value. He’s also in a pretty familiar situation. At the lilypad after a massive fight, just waiting for the door to be opened. He’s probably gonna let this stress the fuck out of him.
ARADIA:
Aradia seemed to be helping out somewhat with the big Lord English fight! She did say something about not participating in it, but it seems she decided fUCK that, and went off to freeze him in time anyways. Though I’m guessing she went off afterwards, as in the ACT 7 animation, it showed her flying around to watch the Green Sun get destroyed or something like that. Aradia’s kinda emotionally broken at this point, so I hardly doubt she’s gonna have any angst about anything that’s happened. She’ll most likely stay indifferently optimistic as always.
TAVROS:
As far as I know, he’s alive on the battlefield after dealing some massive damage (Or just light pummeling) to the big man Lord English. Not much to say on this matter, other than that’s gotta be a real confidence booster for him. I mean, if he even needs any more confidence boosts at this point.
SOLLUX:
I forget honestly. Oops. He might’ve been in the fight, but I don’t think he was? Oh well, I guess we’ll see if he’s still relevant.
NEPETA:
Forgot again. She was probably somewhere in the midst of the fight. I don’t know if there is a single relevant Nepeta anymore.
[EDIT]OH I FORGOT SHE FUZED WITH DAVESPRITE. ok thats all though. They’re on the battlefield with Lord English too I guess.
KANAYA:
She’s on the good ol’ lilypad after an epic encounter with the condesce. I believe she’s got the matriorb from Roxy at this point, so that’s gotta be really exciting for her. I’d imagine that she is really in a good mood. There’s no more trouble, and the coast is finally clear for bringing back their race.
TEREZI:
I can imagine Terezi being excited about this. I think I remember her having some confidence issues, as if she wasn’t living up to the pre-retcon Terezi. But I think there’s a possibility she’s gotten over that? I’m like 90% sure she remembers that entire timeline at this point due to her time powers. And possibly even merged her memories with them? If that’s the case, I can imagine she’s very glad all this shit is over with. She doesn’t even seem to be in this for the new universe at this point, it’s like all she wants is to be with her friends and not deal with all of these greater threats.
VRISKA:
#1 troll is on the battlefield with Lord English. She used the Juju on him, but it’s result is unknown. I’d say she’s probably looking forward to taking this big hero moment. If she does manage to take him out, her pride meter is gonna SKYROCKET. I’m sure she’d be more than happy than to have her friends regard her as a hero. But I’m sure she’s ALSO happy that the threat is gone as well. But like I said, we still don’t know what the Juju did to Lord English.
EQUIUS:
Again, no real iteration of him that matters. Other than I guess ARquiusprite. God, making a stable list of characters is difficult in Homestuck. Either way, not much to say.
GAMZEE:
In the fridge. That’s all. In this new retconned timeline, it’s hard to say how dangerous he is. So I guess we’ll see? Gamzee’s timeline is one of the harder ones to keep track of.
ERIDAN:
none that matter
FEFERI:
none that matter again. i think.
JANE:
This isn’t a character I’m too familiar with. I’m currently rereading Homestuck, so I should be able to get a better grasp on her character during that. But other than that, I’d say she’ll be happy. She’s on the lilypad, and sees her DAD. That’s all, really. 
ROXY:
The batterbitch is dead, in the most symbolic way possible. With a great ol’ symbolism sword. She’s on the lilypad, probably being super badass or super happy, and possibly still having the hots for John.
DIRK:
lilypad. he died, and got revived by jane. And thats all there is to say on the matter..? Again, dirk is one of those characters i had trouble wrapping my head around on the first read. so ill probably have more thoughts later.
JAKE:
He’s on the lilypad after fighting the felt. Not sure what to say on that. moving on.
MEENAH:
Also on the battlefield. not much to say. shes probably still feeling down about leaving (vriska) behind, but who knows? 
DAVEPETASPRITE^2:
A fairly new character! Hard to say  how they feel in the midst of all this. they make a pretty badass sprite though, with a cool/perky personality that i love. so we’ll see more on them later. They’re on the battlefield though!
JASPROSESPRITE^2:
HMm. I dont remember if I saw them on the lilypad, so im not sure where theyre at right now. Again a fairly new character, who I dont know enough about to predict how they feel.
CALLIOPE:
FUckin adorable as always. SHe’s on the lilypad. I dont know how she’s feeling. I believe she was only supposed to protect herself instead of contributing to the fight, but I dont know how shes gonna feel about that. Having to do nothing but stay safe while all your friends throw themselves into danger, and then being told that you can just TAKE the reward with them cant feel good. we’ll see though.
CALIBORN:
Idfk his timeline confuses me at the moment so moving on
(VRISKA):
I dont know. probably being gay or something with (Terezi). She’s probably still recovering from that betrayal on Meenahs end. But this is. kinda hard to comment about.
(TEREZI):
She’s with vriska, finally having found SOME happiness after the fuckfest that was her doomed timeline. Who knows how long she’ll be ok with JUST Vriska, but I guess we’ll see.
ALRIGHT! I probably missed a ton of characters, but it’s so hard to keep track of them all. That’s all I have to say for now.
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