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hoeforalbedo · 5 months ago

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ᗪEᗩᒪ ᗯITᕼ TᕼE ᗪEᐯIᒪ ✟

Prologue

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WARNING: PLEASE READ.

Sensitive topics including vague details of SA. Reader will display many mental health such as depression, PTSD, and anxiety. I will also discuss after effects of said trauma such as hyper sexuality, over-sexualizing oneself, over trusting, and many more. (Many cope in different ways however I am more familiar with this side of the spectrum as I have taken this information from my experience.) Suicidal topics. Horror. Manipulation. Blasphemy. Religious horror and possibly hints of religious trauma. Demons. Paganism. Witchcraft (I try to depict witchcraft as accurate as I can however if I make it too accurate, it will seem boring so I did add magical abilities. I write it based off of how I practice it). Possession. Death. Murder. Exorcism. Sex. Ritualistic sex. Female reader. A bit of crack (reader doesn’t take things seriously. Humor is the way of coping 😭)

If any of these themes trigger you, please do not read. You have already been warned.

Writing criticism is appreciated since I want to get better in writing.

SUMMARY: Depression is shit. This town is shit. Everything is shit. But that priest is sexy and trauma dumping is hot.

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Kim Hongjoong was never the same after working for the Vatican. He had performed an unsuccessful exorcism that took the life of the child. Trauma could do a lot to someone and so he never went back, instead residing in a small town In Massachusetts.

The town has everything it needs, shopping centers, supermarkets, entertainment, and of course, the church. The church is the center of everything, well geographically it isn’t, but everyone’s lives revolve around it.

There was never a need to leave. Those born in the town tend to be stuck in the town.

Fortunately, you were accepted into a prestigious college and had a scholarship to cover you. You were never an academic overachiever as everyone turned out the same. Working in the small town or becoming a nun to contribute to the church.

Everyone has always been devoted to the church. The town is small enough that everyone knows each other to the point you could get a knock on your door if you don’t attend Sunday mass. If you are sick, be prepared to have your parents invite the priest for a private mass.

As a child, you would pray before every meal, abide by the commandments, go to monthly confessions, and of course Bible is above everything. You weren’t allowed to question.

At 13, you asked why God placed the garden in the first place if he knew, since he is the all knowing God after all, that Eve would eat the fruit. Your parents slapped you and had you pray the rosary three times. Another time, you were at school. It was a catholic school where nuns were teachers. You had asked, “If God said that all life is valuable and killing is a sin, why would he order Abraham to sacrifice his son.” You just felt everything to be hypocritical and at the end, you were ordered to kneel on salt as you were slapped and forced to pray.

You were told that everything is all predetermined. That everything is God’s plan. When you looked around, everybody lived the same way everyday. Women were stuck in the house while men worked. “A woman's purpose is to cook and clean. You must always keep your husband happy.” When your room was messy, your mother would always berate you, saying, “If you can’t keep your room clean, how can you expect to marry a man?” Is that really the only purpose you have? If everything is predetermined, is that all there is?

Is that all there is? That question haunted you.In high school you worked extra hard, becoming honors and getting all A’s in all subjects. You even applied to NYU without your parents knowing, and only then when you received the acceptance letter did you tell them. You didn’t give them any choice. You wanted to leave, to study and become successful. They had thought you were possessed by the devil.

So why did you come back to this awful town? Maybe God is against you. Is there even a God? Some being may have decided to punish you. You were walking to the train after your shift at the hospital. You are a neurosurgeon. You know New York can be dangerous at night. Maybe you were asking for it. Ironically, the man was Christian. That cross was all you could look at. At the end, you became depressed. You could afford a psychiatrist but that never really crossed your mind.

The irony of it all was that instead of shying away from sex, it’s like all your body wants is sex. It doesn’t make sense. You would go to clubs and bars to get laid for the night but it never really got anywhere, and the more it never progressed, the more frustrated you got. You spiraled into this sex addict maniac who would oversexualize yourself only to back away when you’re finally feeling good.

In the end, an attempted suicide sent you to the ER and your parents were called. They had decided that taking you back into town would drive the devil out of you.

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"Don't be afraid, for I am with you. Don't be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand," A young man preaches for the hundreds of people in the church. He has black hair and he’s dressed in the green robe priests wear for ordinary times. He is clearly crafted personally by God. God must have taken his time carefully molding this masterpiece. You really shouldn’t be drooling over a priest. The poor lighting of the church doesn’t do his face justice, however he still looks angelic regardless.

“Depression is a sign of weakness, but that does not mean we are alone,” Pastor Hongjoong preaches and it’s clear that he’s talking about you. “God is always there for you and if you reach out to him, he will be there to light the darkness in our hearts. Depression, hopelessness, it is what the devil does to try and claw into us, to tempt us to sin. So brothers and sisters, let us pray for our sister Y/N, to help bring her into the light,” Hongjoong smiles. He watches how you uncomfortably shift in your spot, and it gives him a sense of satisfaction.

Suddenly, it feels like everyone is judging. The church looks darker than before and all eyes look at you, and only you. Even the huge statue of Jesus, a recreation of his crucifixion, stares at you as it hangs above the altar. He’s judging you and it’s clear by the look of Jesus that you aren’t crossing those pearly gates.

Hongjoong doesn’t understand why, but the way you shrink back makes him feel hot, as if his skin is burning. He shouldn’t feel that way and it causes him to feel sick to the stomach. He rushes the mass, and once he’s walked down the aisle where people sang the psalms around him like some sort of ritual, he goes to his office and downs two bottles of water. He mutters prayers under his breath until he can calm himself. Hongjoong was never the same since after the exorcism. The night haunts him and there are days when he questions his own faith. He must be a weak priest for questioning God but there are far too many questions than answers.

Once he had collected himself, he made his way back out where many people outside were waiting to say hi to him.

“Can we go home?” You whine. You already experienced unbearable humiliation earlier. It’s much worse when the town pretty much knows your business.

“No. Father! Father Hongjoong, our daughter, Y/N. We were hoping you were open for confession after the many sins she had committed. It’s also worse that she hasn’t saved herself for marriage-“ Your dad began, each word filling you with rage.

“You know I didn’t have a choice!” You yell loud enough for people to look at you weirdly. “How could you just tell people my business like that?”

“I do hope you can take her into the convent,” Your dad continues.

“I will not be a nun!” You snap.

“As you can see, Father, we fear the devil may have gotten to her,” Your mother nearly cried, dabbing her face with a handkerchief when there were no tears.

“It is unfortunate what you had to go through. It seems that the devil truly has power in this world and you just had to experience it first hand,” Hongjoong gives a comforting smile. He understands where you’re coming from.

“Well what can we say? It is all God’s plan, am I right Father?” Your dad laughs and looks for the priest’s approval of his words.

Hongjoong forces a laugh. How could God plan something so cruel? You didn’t ask for it. He didn’t ask for it and yet everyone else is justifying everything, making it seem that the pain is pointless.

“I always tell her, God gives us free will but some things happen for a reason! It was what God wanted!” Your dad continues when he believes Hongjoong agrees with him. You wanted to hurt your dad. Is that bad?

Hongjoong wanted this man to shut up. It is people like him who use religion to justify their wrong doings. “I’ll take her to the back for confession,” He interrupts. “Please follow me, Ms. Y/N.”

“Y/N is just fine,” You mumble as you follow him. You’d rather follow through with that stupid confession than hear your father’s words. There’s a reason you left.

You found yourself in a stereotypical confessional booth where there’s a screen in between you and the handsome priest.

“This is stupid. I did nothing wrong,” You mutter.

“In the eyes of God it may,” Hongjoong says thickly.

“That’s stupid,” You scoff.

“That, I can understand.”

A moment of silence comes between you both.

“I’ll just play into this stupid thing,” You sigh defeatedly. You didn’t want to go back to your parents so soon.

“Go ahead. I’m all ears,” He chuckles amusedly. “Oh Father forgive me for I have sin,” You say sarcastically, scrunching your face up in disgust. “I tried to kill my self because I couldn’t handle being a slut and having sex before marriage. If only I said no then maybe this wouldn’t have happened,” You mock the people who went up to you and called you names.

“Is that how you really feel?” Honjoong ask.

“Sure,” You shrug nonchalantly. If that’s what everyone is saying, it must be true, right?

“Let’s take out the religion aspect. Is that how you really feel?” He asks genuinely.

You scoff bitterly, “No. I find all of this stupid. These people are hypocrites! These people are calling me names, calling me whore and slut as if they know me! And- And-“ It suddenly becomes so hard to breathe and there’s a stinging feeling in your eyes. “Fuck!” You wipe the tears that had begun to fall. You never knew how badly you needed to let everything out. “I really didn’t ask for it,” You whimper, allowing yourself to be vulnerable with a stranger.

“I know you didn’t. Some people are just cruel,” He answers as he gnaws on the bottom of his lip until it bled. The booth feels as if it’s closing in on him. Why does he feel this way? Your words make him sad, angry, murderous even. A part of him wants to save you. Protect you. It’s overstepping his job as a priest. He shouldn’t get so caught up when he just met you.

“He was wearing a cross,” You mutter. “That was all I could think about. I didn’t care if he had me pinned down, he was wearing a cross and all I could think was, maybe this is what God wanted. Maybe he’s punishing me. Maybe I wanted it after all. I didn’t even say stop. Maybe they are right,” You croak, thoughts spiraling from one bad idea to the next.

Hongjoong had enough of gripping his seat from anger. Ironically enough, he would have just made the same excuse back then, tell her the same thing everyone is saying. ‘Everything happens for a reason. It is God’s will!’ He doesn’t feel that way anymore. This is one of the times he wanted to curse God. You seem so sweet and genuinely a good person. He heard you were a surgeon and he’s impressed that a person from this town made it to be so successful, especially when everyone is so closed minded.

Hongjoong stood up, no longer wanting to feel suffocated by the booth. He left his side to go into yours, to see you face to face without some barrier between you. “Hey, it’s not your fault. You didn’t want it. Did you tell him yes? Did you tell him it was okay to touch you?” He asks.

“No,” You shake your head.

“May I?” He asks to touch your hand.

You hesitate.

“It’s okay to say no,” He assures you and you’ve never felt more comfortable with a man till now.

You nod.

“No no, I want to hear you use your words. Let me hear you.”

“You can touch me,” You whisper and you fight back a smirk when you realize the sexual innuendo. You wouldn’t mind fucking him. God it’s so frustrating. You’re supposed to feel depressed and yet you tend to go between depressed and horny.

Warmth erupts within Hongjoong although he tries to push it down within him, his skin feeling as if it’s burning again. His spine tingles and he subtly shudders. He holds your hand, giving it a warm squeeze.

“Lust is never a bad thing. It goes way more beyond sex. We, as humans, lust for money, success, power, and so much more,” Hongjoong says. He tells you things that a devout child of God would never say. “But, there’s a reason why lust is a sin. When people crave too much of it, when they become greedy, they start doing things that could hurt others. You’re not a slut. You’re not a whore. You are the victim of a sinner.”

#ateez #ateez fanfic #ateez fic #ateez imagines #ateez hongjoong #ateez scenarios #ateez smut #ateez x reader #kim hongjoong #hongjoong x reader #hongjoong #hongjoong smut

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nobodysdaydreams · 2 months ago

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In Honor of All Saints Day, Here's Some Random Assumptions About My Followers Based on Their Favorite Saints 😇

Please note this is a merely for fun and not meant to offend anyone, please be kind, thank you. Also, I obviously can't possibly include every saint here, so I'm just gonna stick to some of the ones I think are most likely to be favorites of my followers.

Saint Joan of Arc- I'll start with arguably the most popular one, or at least the one I see posted or discussed online the most. If your favorite saint is St. Joan of Arc, there's a good chance you're an atheist who doesn't vibe with saints in general, but likes her because she's a girl with a sword and that's objectively awesome. You're correct for that, and welcome to the post. Another option is that you're a girl who was labeled a "tomboy" growing up.

Saint Paul- if your favorite saint is St. Paul, you have a blog or a significant portion of your blog dedicated to one ex-villain character whose redemption arc you could rewatch on loop for hours. You also might be Protestant, and yes, this particular St. Paul is the same Paul from the Bible. Welcome to the post. ✝️

Saint Olga- if your favorite saint is St. Olga, you support women's rights, but more importantly, you forgive women's wrongs. There have been several times when you've gotten upset about people questioning the validity of a female character's redemption considering her past when they overlook and forgive way worse done by male characters. There's also a chance you might be Orthodox. Welcome to the post. ☦️

Saint Nicholas- if your favorite saint is St. Nicholas, there is a chance you followed me for TMBS content. Your favorite holiday is Christmas, and you're still hyperfixated on the same book series or television show from your childhood. You're also extremely passionate about your fandoms and can't stand it when people grossly misinterpret characters or things in canon.

Saint Benedict- if your favorite saint is St. Benedict, you also probably followed me for TMBS content. You're also a very humble and unproblematic person but the haters are bitter and always trying to bring you down (via their jealousy and also poison, but you can't be stopped).

Saint Scholastica- if your favorite saint is St. Scholastica, you also might have followed me for TMBS content because you know that she's Benedict's twin sister. You also wish that God would summon storms for you whenever you find your brother annoying.

The Virgin Mary, Mother of Jesus- if you picked the Virgin Mary, you're neurodivergent, specifically the type of neurodivergent who loved those card games where characters had different levels of power. You take a similar approach to picking your favorite saint, so why wouldn't you go straight for the one that is objectively the most powerful and the best one? It just makes to most sense to you, and the thing is, you're right. You're 100% right. Congrats!

Saint Cecilia- if your favorite saint is St. Cecilia, you're a musician and were in choir either at school or church. You also probably are/were a theater kid.

Saint Lawrence- if your favorite saint is St. Lawrence, you were definitely a theater kid and tried stand up comedy at least once. You also use jokes and humor to cope with stressful situations.

Saint Josephine Bakhita- if your favorite saint is St. Josephine, you are one of those people who somehow remains positive and sees the sliver lining in literally any circumstance. Don't get me wrong, I love that for you, but please take care of yourself. 🫂❤️‍🩹

Saint Dymphna- if your favorite saint is St. Dymphna, you are neurodivergent, have struggled with mental illness, work in psychiatric or medical care, or you’ve dealt with a lot in your life, and I hope you heal. 🫂❤️‍🩹

Saint Kateri Tekakwitha- if your favorite saint is Saint Kateri, you're sick of your relatives pressuring you to date someone, and you're extremely worried about climate change (girl, me too).

Saint Anthony- if your favorite saint is St. Anthony, you have ADHD and lose things multiple times a week. On the off chance you followed me for Wolf359 content, you identified way too strongly with Doug Eiffel.

Saint Peter- if your favorite saint is saint Peter, you either watch "The Chosen" or you have ADHD and felt seen when you read about him in the Bible. That man boldly declared he would never deny Jesus and when told he would do it before a rooster crowed three times, to which he confidently replied "nah" and then immediately got distracted and preoccupied with cutting some guy's ear off and forgot all about the oddly specific terrible thing he was prophesied to do just a few hours earlier by a man he believed to be God incarnate. As someone who also breaks down in tears when I suddenly remember the important things I forget to keep track of, I sympathize with his story. Saint Dymphna is patroness of most mental illness and ADHD is technically covered by her, but if we ever get an ADHD specific saint, I know it has to be either be Peter or Anthony, and if it were entirely up to me, I'd give it to Peter. Don't get me wrong, Saint Anthony is there for us, but Saint Peter is one of us, you know what I mean? Though I feel like due to the problematic nature of diagnosing the deceased (no matter how evident symptoms might be) it would end up going to Anthony, since we do call on him often, and I think Peter would be fine with that.

Saint Mark Ji Tianxiang- if your favorite saint is St. Mark Ji Tianxiang, you or someone you know is probably in recovery from addiction, and I wish you well on your journey. You also empathize way too much with any character who suffers from addiction and if you followed me for Wolf359, that was the aspect of Doug Eiffel's character that stood out to you the most. 🫂❤️‍🩹

Saint Catherine of Siena- if your favorite saint is Saint Catherine of Siena, you've probably written a book or fanfic well over 100k words. (Yes, I know, you don't have to say it).

Saint Francis of Assisi- if your favorite saint is Saint Francis of Assisi, you either have pets or want them, and if you do have them, you've taken them or begged your parents to let you take them to a St. Francis feast day pet blessing. If you followed me for TMBS, SQ is probably your favorite character, and if you followed me for Wolf359 content, you were inconsolable when Blessie died. You're also probably the kind of neurodivergent who takes things like "if you want to follow God, sell all you have and give it to the poor" literally and as a result, this has caused conflict with your family (specifically on account of you giving all the money made from your family business to the poor).

Saint Joseph- I doubt I have a lot of followers who are parents because of how tumblr demographics skew, but if your favorite saint is Saint Joseph, you just became a dad or really want to become one someday.

Saint Monica- again, I doubt this is the case because of the age of tumblr demographics, but if your favorite saint is Saint Monica, you're a mom who really needs a break, and I hope your husband and sons get it together soon. 🫂❤️‍🩹

Saint Augustine- if your favorite saint is St. Augustine, you also like redemption arcs and likely went through a "party phase" at some point in your life that you regret and identify a bit too strongly with the younger brother in the prodigal son parable. However, in this case, you likely also love St. Monica and if you followed me for Star Wars content, you are particularly upset that we didn't get to see more interactions between Leia Organa and her son Benny Solo especially considering they led a whole war against each other the year between TLJ and TROS (dead horse, I know).

Saint Juan Diego Cuauhtlatoatzin- if your favorite saint is St. Juan Diego, you have or grew up with a picture of Our Lady of Guadalupe somewhere in your house. You've also been in the incredibly specific situation of seeing or doing something super cool, but not having anyone believe you (but the satisfying payoff when they find out you were right).

Saint Mary Magdalene- if your favorite saint is St. Mary Magdalene, you either watch "The Chosen" or you're a woman who's faith pulled her out of a very difficult time in her life, and like St. Juan Diego, you also know what it's like to be proven right after a group of men call you a liar.

Saints Louis Martin and Marie-Azélie Guérin (Zélie)- if these are your favorite saints, you understand why you can't just pick one. This power couple comes in a set. If you picked these two, you heard about them because your favorite saint might actually be or have been their very famous daughter St. Thérèse of Lisieux. And if you're a guy and you picked these two, you're also a proud girl dad and can't stop bragging to everyone you meet about how successful your wife's business is (especially because she's so humble about it). Green flags all around.

Saint Maximilian Kolbe- if St. Maximilian is your favorite saint, you're a history guy or gal who is obsessed with world war two, but in a good way. In the "this was very not cool. Let's never forget so we never do this again" way. You also love stories of heroic sacrifice and aspire to always do the right thing even when it’s not socially popular or doesn’t benefit you.

(Soon to be canonized) Saint Carlo Acutis- You're a millennial or gen z who loves researching and talking about modern saints. You aspire to be like them and have a list of ones you want canonized (mine are Servant of God Dorothy Day and Archbishop Joseph Francis Rummel. They lived in the 20th Century and when you're dealing with 2,000 years of history, that's pretty modern).

I'm sure I'll think of more to add after I post this, but I'll leave it here for now. I hope y'all enjoy this!

#Happy All Saints Day!#Catholic #Catholicism #Catholic saints #roman catholic #saints #christianity #all saints #all saints day

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unabashegirl · 1 year ago

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Enticing 34 || Harry Styles

Summary: Harry is a young billionaire and CEO of his own company. He mostly keeps to himself, he is stern and very meticulous when it comes to business. He also likes to keep his personal life very private for the sake of his newly born son Oliver Styles. It isn't until he meets Y/N Y/L/N that everything changes. She becomes his new nanny after his previous one quits due to personal reasons. She is young, caring, and sweet. Will they ignore their feelings? Will Harry's girlfriend accept their love and leave them? Will she be able to cope with his busy agenda? What about Oliver's mother? Where is she? Who is she?

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Y/N found herself seated in the cozy confines of the Indian restaurant, the warm ambiance and enticing aromas tantalizing her senses. She glanced down at her watch, the minutes ticking away as her anticipation grew. She had arrived a bit early, eager to honor the plans she and Harry had made for their dinner date.

As her gaze flitted over the menu, a mixture of hunger and curiosity stirring within her, the entrance of the restaurant caught her attention. Her heart skipped a beat as she saw Harry walking in, his presence commanding attention even before he reached her table.

Harry's eyes scanned the room briefly before landing on her, and a genuine smile lit up his face. The sight of her sitting there, waiting for him, was a reminder of the connection they were trying to rebuild—a connection that had been tested by time, distance, and unexpected revelations.

Y/N couldn't help but admire Harry's impeccable appearance as he approached her table. His perfectly tailored suit accentuated his form, the elegance of his attire matched by the warm sincerity in his gaze.

"Y/N," Harry greeted her, his voice a mixture of warmth and fondness.

"Harry," Y/N replied, her smile mirroring his.

As he took his seat across from her, their eyes met in a silent exchange that held a hint of vulnerability. The weight of their shared history and the newfound dynamics they were navigating was palpable, but so was the desire to bridge the gap between them.

"I'm sorry I kept you waiting," Harry apologized, his expression sincere.

Y/N waved off his concern, her gaze softening. "No worries. I just got here myself."

Harry's smile deepened, a touch of relief evident in his features. "I hope you're hungry. I've heard great things about this place."

Y/N chuckled softly, her laughter a testament to their shared humor. "Starving, actually. And Indian food sounds perfect."

As they perused the menu together, an air of camaraderie settled between them—a comfortable familiarity that held the promise of eased tensions and genuine conversation. The tension that had marked their previous interactions seemed to fade in the warmth of the restaurant's ambiance.

As they engaged in light banter, the layers of complexity that had once overshadowed their connection began to peel away. Their conversations flowed with ease, and Y/N found herself laughing more freely than she had in a long time. In the space of the restaurant, they were just two individuals, connecting over shared experiences and the prospect of a future that held hope.

As the evening progressed, their connection deepened, the weight of their history giving way to a sense of rediscovery. The wounds of the past were gradually being replaced by the potential for healing and growth—a future that was as uncertain as it was promising. And as they dined together, their laughter mingled with the flavors of the food, creating a tapestry of shared memories and newfound possibilities.

Harry and Y/N's conversation continued to flow, carrying them through topics that ranged from their shared history to hopes for the future. As the evening progressed, a pivotal decision emerged—a decision that held the potential to shape the path ahead.

Harry looked down at his phone, his fingers tapping against the screen as he navigated the sensitive topic that lay between them. He took a deep breath and met Y/N's gaze, his expression earnest.

"Y/N," he began, his voice gentle yet resolute, "about the paternity test..."

Y/N's attention shifted to him, her curiosity evident. "Yes?"

Harry's gaze held hers, a mixture of seriousness and determination in his eyes. "I think we should schedule the appointment for the day after tomorrow. I want to get this over with."

Y/N nodded in understanding, the weight of his words settling between them. "I agree. It's something that needs to be addressed."

There was a pause in their conversation as Y/N a bite out of her coconut chicken green curry, her thoughts mingling with the flavors on her palate. Harry's decision to confront the issue head-on resonated with her, a testament to the complexities of their situation.

Harry's fingers danced across his phone's screen as he responded to a message from Andrew, his assistant. A sense of purpose seemed to guide his actions as he navigated the logistics of their decision.

Andrew had taken the initiative to set up the appointment with Harry's family doctor, knowing that this step was significant for both Harry and Y/N. As Harry typed out his response, his focus remained on the conversation at hand, the weight of the decision they were making still heavy in his mind.

Y/N's gaze shifted from her plate to Harry's face, her expression a mixture of understanding and curiosity. "Did you manage to set up the appointment?"

Harry nodded, a sense of accomplishment in his gaze. "Yes, Andrew's already on it. The appointment is scheduled for the day after tomorrow."

Y/N's appreciation was evident in her smile. "Thank you"

Their conversation continued, intertwining with the decision they had made.

As the evening unfolded, the air around Harry and Y/N seemed to hold a delicate balance—a balance between reconnecting, addressing their shared past, and navigating the uncharted territory that lay before them. With the paternity test scheduled, the topic of their future was bound to arise.

The aroma of their meals still hung in the air as Y/N's gaze met Harry's, curiosity evident in her eyes. "Harry, what's going to happen after the paternity test? I mean, if it confirms everything..."

Harry's expression was contemplative, his gaze steady as he met her eyes. "I've been thinking about that, Y/N. And honestly, I'd like you to move in with me—for the duration of the pregnancy."

Y/N's eyebrows shot up in surprise, a mixture of emotions flickering in her eyes. "Move in with you?"

Harry nodded, his tone sincere. "Yeah. I want to be there for every step of this journey. I want to support you through the pregnancy, and I want us to share this experience together."

There was a moment of silence, the weight of Harry's words hanging in the air between them. Y/N's mind raced as she processed his request, a complex mixture of feelings swirling within her.

"I appreciate your offer, Harry," Y/N began, her voice soft yet resolute, "but I can't accept that."

Harry's expression shifted to one of confusion, his brows furrowing slightly. "Why not? I just want to be there for you."

Y/N's gaze held a mixture of determination and vulnerability as she spoke. "I'm in the process of renting out my first apartment. And more than that, I want to continue to be independent. I know you mean well, but I can't simply move in with you. We're not together anymore."

Harry's features softened with understanding, his gaze reflecting a sense of empathy. "Y/N, I get it. I respect your need for independence. But this is about supporting each other through a crucial time."

Y/N's eyes glistened with unshed tears, her emotions on display. "Harry, how can you expect us to live together now, when we're not together as a couple anymore? It's not the same as it was".

Harry sighed, his gaze dropping to the table momentarily before meeting hers again. "You're right, Y/N. It's complicated. But my intention is just to be there for you, to share in this experience as parents."

Y/N's gaze softened, the vulnerability in her expression matching his. "I know, Harry. And I appreciate that. But we have to find a way to navigate this in a way that works for both of us. I want to continue to be independent, even amidst the pregnancy."

Harry nodded slowly, understanding her point of view.

Their conversation lingered in the air, the weight of their decisions and the complexity of their feelings forming a bridge between them—a bridge that held the potential to guide them forward, even as their paths diverged. The future was uncertain, but in their shared dialogue, they found a glimmer of understanding—a reminder that despite the challenges, they were united by the life they were bringing into the world and the journey they were embarking upon, together in a new way.

The evening had been a delicate dance of shared moments and honest conversations, woven together by the flavors of their dinner and the warmth of their connection. As they finished their meal, Harry's insistence on indulging in dessert had elicited a smile from Y/N—a momentary reprieve from the complexities that surrounded them.

With the Indian restaurant behind them, they found themselves strolling through the streets, the cool evening air a balm against the tensions that had simmered beneath the surface of their discussions. Their steps were unhurried, their conversation light as they explored the cityscape that surrounded them.

As they walked, their path led them to a baby store, its display windows showcasing an array of items meant for the tiniest members of society. Their gazes lingered on the storefront, both hesitating just outside the entrance.

Nervousness mingled with curiosity as they exchanged a glance, the unspoken fears and uncertainties hanging in the air between them like a fragile thread.

Harry's voice broke the silence, his tone soft yet tinged with vulnerability. "I never thought I'd be standing outside a baby store like this. Not even after Oliver. I sent out someone to buy everyone for him”.

Y/N's gaze remained fixed on the store's window, her emotions visible in the furrow of her brows. "Me neither." Y/N remembered that Harry wasn't there for Oliver's pregnancy. Ashley had taken that away from him. She had almost taken that away from him.

For a moment, they stood there, their shared history and the circumstances that brought them to this point weighing heavily on their shoulders. The future was uncertain, and the prospect of parenthood together had brought them to a crossroads—one that was filled with both hope and apprehension.

Harry's fingers brushed against Y/N's hand, his touch a gentle reminder of their connection. "It's okay to be scared, Y/N."

Y/N's gaze met his, vulnerability and uncertainty mirrored in her eyes. "I know. It's just...it's a lot to process."

Harry nodded, understanding the weight of her words. "It is. But no matter what happens, I'll be here for you".

As they continued to stand outside the baby store, the moments of shared silence and understanding seemed to knit their connection closer. The complexities of their situation had not faded, but the willingness to confront their fears and navigate their shared journey was a testament to their growth.

With a deep breath, Y/N turned to Harry, a mixture of emotions playing across her features. "You're right. We'll figure it out. And maybe...maybe we can step inside and take a look."

A small smile tugged at the corner of Harry's lips, his gaze holding a mixture of warmth and reassurance. "Only if you're ready, Y/N."

Together, they stepped inside the baby store—a physical manifestation of the path they were treading together. As they explored the aisles and examined the tiny garments and necessities, a sense of unity seemed to settle within them, quieting their fears and strengthening their resolve.

TAGLIST: @0oolookitsme, @happycupcakeenthusiast, @kennedywxlsh, @hsfics, @stylesbrock, @cuddlingwithharry, @sucker4angstt, @bluemoonedwings, @cherriesrae, @vornilla, @mellamolayla, @harryscurls21, @stilesissaved, @be-with-me-so-happily, @harryssattelitestomper, @jerseygirlinca, @tenaciousperfectionunknown, @lomlolivia, @stylesfever, @daphnesutton, @n0vaj3an, @breezykpop, @kathb59

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memelover1024 · 1 year ago

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The Bronze Queen - Prologue

Summary: Daemon Targaryen's eldest child Anya Targaryen is married to Aegon after Driftmark. How will she cope with the dance of the dragons? Will she side with her family or her husband?

Driftmark

The doors to Anya's chambers opened abruptly, waking her form her sleep. A maid around her age entered through the large doors. “My Princess, your father has requested your presence.” Anya sat up in bed. “Why?” “I do not know your grace, only that it is urgent.” Anya got out of bed. “Help me dress.”

Anya walked through the halls of Driftmark to the chambers in which her father was staying. She stopped outside the door and the kingsguard on post nodded at her before knocking on the door. “My prince, Princess Anya is here.” “Send her in '' she heard her fathers voice say from behind the doors. The kingsguard opened the door and she entered. Sitting in a great chair before the hearth sat her father, Prince Daemon Targaryen, the rogue prince. Daemon didn’t turn to face her as she entered, continuing to watch the flames. Anya hesitantly approached her father. “You sent for me, father?” She was hesitant. “Yes. Come sit with me.” He said softly, smiling slightly towards her. Anya sat in the chair opposite him. She was confused, Her father was never this pleasant towards her, the only time he even acknowledged her existence was to chastise her for something. She knew something must be amiss. Daemon reached out and tucked a loose strand of her auburn hair behind her ears. She looked down shyly at her hand, picking at the skin around her fingernails. “My daughter, a woman grown” he said to himself. He pulled away from her and a serious expression settled itself upon his face. “There was an incident last night while you were sleeping.” Dread filled Anya, what had happened, why did it concern her. “Your sisters engaged in a fight with the Prince Aemond. Courtesy of your cousin Lucerys, has lost an eye.” worry filled Anya at that, she could only imagine what punishment the queen would demand of her sisters. Anya's mind did not stay on her sisters for long however. “To close the rift between our families, the king has requested you be betrothed to his son Aegon. And I have accepted.” Anya's eyes snapped up to meet her fathers in fear, and sadly she did not see a hint of humor in them. She tried to deny it. “You must be jesting. Right father?” Dameon sighed. “Sadly not, sweet girl.” “But… Aegon is a disgusting whoremonger.” “He will treat you honorably, I have made sure of it.” “He has no honor to speak of.” “Ahhh. You and your bloody honor. Aegon is a prince of the realm, you will be mother to pureblooded Targaryen princes and you will secure his obedience.” “Obedience! You're whoring me out to that brute to gain his obedience. For what? What could you possibly want from him?” “Oh my dear, I thought you were so much smarter than this. I want him to not challenge Rhaenyras claim.” “And I'm the way to ensure that?” “Yes.” “How!?!” she screamed at him. He looked at her calmly. “You will make him fall in love with you, and you will manipulate him into following your every order.” He told her unemotionally. Anya scoffed. “Like that's gonna work, he will never respect me enough to give me a second glance, let alone fall in love with me. You’d have a better chance getting a whore to do your dirty work, he might actually listen to her.” She berated him, beyond frustrated. Daemon remained calm. “You're not getting the point, daughter.” “What is the point then, enlighten me.” Daemon leaned forward in his chair and met her eyes. “You will be his whore. You will fuck him to his hearts content and then by the time your uncle dies he will be so cuntstruck that he wont be able to think clearly unless hes inbetween your legs.” Anya breathed deeply, trying to force the tears threatening to exit her eyes away. She got up and stood before him, her fists balled at her sides, eyes red with anger and betrayal. “So that's all I am to you. Just some…. thing you can sell off when you don't want it all anymore. To be used and abused like I'm nothing! You won’t let Baela and Rhaena marry but you're selling me off to be some whore broodmare!” She screamed in his face. She saw anger build in his eyes. “Get out.” he told her in a calm but stern voice. She got even more angry. “No. You don’t just get too-” “GET OUT” he screamed at her. She flinched, the tears finally escaping her eyes. She turned on her heels and ran out the door, the giant oak door slamming shut behind her.

#aegon ii targaryen #aegon x oc #aegon targaryen x reader #aegon ii #the dance of the dragons #house targaryen #aegon x reader

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blccdiedcruel · 3 months ago

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@ BLCCDIEDCRUEL : an indie && mutuals only portrayal of Daemon Targaryen from HBO's House of the Dragon. beloved by Quill ( 21+ , they/them ). A mix of show, book, and heavily headcanon based. ( follows from @drakonquill )

𝐚 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐝𝐲 𝐢𝐧: reluctance, violence, restlessness, devotion, aggression, queer customs, autistic mannerisms, humor as means to cope and deflect, insults, sly tongue, dragons, love, family, honor, war, bloodshed.

main blog. prompts. verses. headcanons.

portrayal note below cut . . .

as I believe and feel that Daemon and Rhaenyra's relationship is a big part of their shared destiny, the ship Daemyra will be explored, engaged with, and mentioned heavily in relation to Daemon on this blog. I do not believe they can be separated without heavy changing of canon, however I will explore ships with other characters, crossovers, and more. If that isn't your cup of tea, I HIGHLY advice not following this blog.

#pinned.#21+#they/them #mdni #last updated: 9.19.24

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shrinkthisviolet · 7 days ago

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if HR had a Jesse (with his partner Mr. Morgan maybe?) what do you think she'd be like? do you think she'd get along with Morgan?

Oooh interesting! Hmm...I think she'd have traits of HR, like his zany humor and goofiness...but I think E19 Jesse would display much more of her seriousness to sorta push back against her dad's "excessive goofiness." Obviously HR is capable of being serious when he wants to be, but I do think E19 Jesse could very well get frustrated at how the norm is for HR to turn almost everything into a joke. This is, ofc, just HR's way of coping with things, and also his way of showing love, but it makes sense that E19 Jesse would have a hard time realizing that, and it would cause tension between them. Though...there are those moments when HR manages to tease out his daughter's goofiness and they have fun together—those are the best times.

I think she'd get along pretty well with Morgan...though she'd still take Morgan aback with just how seriously she presents herself—which is saying something, because Morgan has always been incredibly serious about that, it's something Jesse even teases her about (initially taunting, but later gentle teasing), and yet here's this version of them that's somehow even more serious than Morgan is. So that would be a bit trippy. I think Jesse in particular, though, would relate to E19 Jesse finding HR irritating...though at the same time, she'd have to be careful about being diplomatic, because E19 Jesse will defend her dad's honor to the death. Morgan, on the other hand, who befriends HR*, would be more suited to help him and E19 Jesse reconcile, because she sees the merits in HR that E19 Jesse might have a hard time seeing.

Ofc Jesse herself could also help out in the sense that she understands what it's like to have issues with your dad but still love each other, and just needing to work some things out now and then. Even loving relationships, healthy ones, need work and maintenance, because ultimately every person is a little bit different, so there will inevitably be arguments and fights from time to time, things that need to be discussed and worked through. That's normal! So that perspective from Jesse would be helpful too.

...bit of a long-winded answer but hopefully that answers your question 😅

As a bonus, I have more thoughts on Morgan & HR below the cut (an expansion of the asterisk I marked earlier). And ofc the taglist:

*oh boy, I could talk about Morgan and HR for ages. Because...here's the thing—you'd think that she would think he's annoying even more than Jesse does, right? Except...she and Jesse have had different experiences with Harrison Wells. Morgan's was initially betrayal, while Jesse's was initially safety. So Morgan inherently distrusts every version of Harrison Wells...though depending on the version, she gets over this quickly or slowly. Harry, who is very prickly and brusque and doesn't try to be excessively nice, wins Morgan's trust because that is an objectively stupid way to present yourself if you want to be trusted...which means Harry isn't running a con, he's just being himself. HR, though...he is excessively nice. Unlike Eowells**, that's just how he is, but Morgan doesn't trust it (this is also why she doesn't trust Hunter in s2, tho ofc that is also an act like Eowells's). At least...not at first. She never thinks HR is annoying—she never gets the chance. She distrusts him for so long, but then she starts to warm up to him...specifically because she realizes his kindness is genuine. And that's refreshing to her. Jesse's norm is a tough but unconditionally-loving dad. Morgan's norm is a tough, demanding, conditionally-loving dad. Jesse doesn’t need to expect better—her situation is a good one, she and Harry just need to work out the odds and ends. Morgan, though...her whole situation is so fucked that she does need to kinda reinvent the wheel, expect better. So as she warms up to HR, and especially recalling Tina's stories of her dad...she thinks HR is the closest she might ever get to knowing her dad. Which is just so incredibly bittersweet, isn't it?

**Eowells wasn't faking his love, of course, and not all of his kind gestures were for ulterior motives (he did genuinely care for them, after all), but a) there is still a pretense there, because he’s still lying to them, and b) some of his actions are for ulterior motives (some of them were just out of love, but some were probably to ensure loyalty...most probably at the start, before he grew to love them). HR, though...there's no pretense with him at all. He is naturally just Like That

Taglist (send an ask or DM to be added or removed):

@arrthurpendragon @ocappreciationtag @raith-way @vexic929 @ironverseocs

@thechaoticfanartist @tempests-of-hope @negative-speedforce @starstruckpurpledragon @angst-is-love-angst-is-life

#morgan & hr #oc: morgan wells #e19 jesse wells #hr wells #jesse quick #jesse wells #the flash #i have MANY many thoughts about morgan & hr #and i will die on the hill that hr wells is the most like e1 harrison wells #and i will also be upset forever that the show never even SUGGESTS those parallels #(tho ig that would require them to CARE about e1 harrison 💀)

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starcrossedyanderes · 9 months ago

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How about sfw or yandere alphabet for Rygel?

Man, it has been a while since I wrote for Rygel, even longer for an alphabet!

Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

Rygel doesn't really have touch as one of his love languages. His species is somewhat similar to Vulcans, as they don't really don't emotions as much as humans. For those unaware Rygel's species have soulmates of sorts, that depends on each other's minds. Pretty much this means his species only really feel anything towards their mates, parents, and childrens.

His affection isn't really visible. Rygel has extreme psychokinetic powers, and uses these to show affection. Expect to constanly feel his psychic powers caressing you, placing kisses along your body, playing with your hair, etc.

He also just likes spending time with you and doing acts of love. He helps you reach books, things like that. Which is saying a lot because of his sheer hatred for pretty much anyone that isn't you.

Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?

Rygel doesn't do messy. But that doesn't mean he won't kill for you. The opposite, actually.

Rygel's people are conquerors of the universe, and he is their emperor. He sees the human species as a lacking species (except you, darling~ ♡)

He essentially has an entire army and death rays at his command, he will not hesitate to use them.

But he will not get bloody. He is a very neat and tidy person. He will just use his mind powers, or have someone else do it. You should be honored that he even considered personally taking care of a human being for you.

Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

Rygel isn't the nicest, but not necessarily cruel. You would probably just be limited to his chambers on his ship, with a few rooms you can access outside it. He has endless entertainment for you, and treats you to many vacations across the galaxy. He would never hurt you or say hurtful words, he's just somewhat monotone with his words. This can cause you to even question if he has a prefrence to you at all. But I assure you, he can be very poetic and romantic with his words when he wishes. It just doesn't quite come naturally.

Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

They will do hugs and kisses. That's it, really. He'll maybe move you around or hold you in place with his mind powers, but that's about it. Doesn't really kiss on the lips much either. Sometimes he can read your thoughts and invade your dreams.

Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

Rygel has nothing to be vulnerable about. He will talk out his plans with you, as he sees no need to keep you in the dark once abducted. You are to be empress, and you are powerless to stop him in whatever plans he has.

Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?

Humorous. It may get a bit of a chuckle out of him. What a feat. You will give in eventually, he is not worried about your lashing out.

Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?

Sometimes it's a bit of a game, if he's bored. But for the most part any escape attempt is swiftly cut short.

Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

Isolation. He can easily just leave you in his chambers for days. Or he'll just make you watch as he destroys entire planets.

Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

Rygel's people do not do marriage. Once you feel the mating connection and find them, you are forever connected. You will be his empress and you will rear some children. He will conquer the universe, with you by his side.

Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?

Rygel does not like any male really touching or talking to you. This is even worse when he sees humans talking to you. He knows you are the same species, but he doesn't need such scum trying to ruin you. His psychokinesis will swiftly pulling you into him, and you shall walk away with him. If they are insistent he will deal with him in the torture chambers and break their minds until they become a shell of their former selves, maybe he'll turn them into slaves for you.

Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling?

He is much nicer around you. You're like the one person he doesn't actively dislike. He never says anything downgrading to you, and is actually nice. If you are around he'll probably lean into you, and complain about whoever he's had to deal with. You're pretty much the one person who can tell him to do something, and he will do it.

You can prattle on, and he will actually listen.

Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

So this may be touched on in a later story (wishful thinking probs tho) Rygel may start to reach out with dreams, then somewhat reaches out in the real world. You may receive love letters, and flowers from his alien planet. Until one day he just kinda tells you that you are now mates.

Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

To be honest, he's fairly blunt with everyone. Mind you he obviously doesn't inform anyone on else about him being an alien, but he doesn't really act nice to anyone.

Naughty: How would they punish their darling?

His psychokinesis has it's ways to deal with you. Isolation, messing with your mind, your body, if it's really bad he can give you nightmares.

Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?

Mostly independence. Most of the time you will be limited to his ship or one of his palaces. But, will take you anywhere you wish to see in the galaxy. The stars and universe are your playground. But, it's only your playground because he allows it. You'll have to enjoy it with him. You are either with him, or his chambers. No outside ventures with just guard escorts.

Patience: How patient are they with their darling?

He's pretty patient. He has an eternity to get you to love him back. His species is not prone to something as simple as impatience. Besides, the mating bond definitely effects you as well. Eventually you'll grow more fond of him.

If worse comes to worse he'll just break your mind into itty-bitty pieces and rebuild you as he likes.

Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

Rygel's people tend to die when their mate dies.

Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?

No. Rygel's species does not suffer from guilt.

Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?

It is merely his biology, and who he is. He is an all powerful conquering emperor. Simply as that.

Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?

He can't stand seeing you cry. It's- annoying for one and his mind can sense when yours's is in such distress. Isolating is more so seen as annoying, but if he wishes he could rather easily pluck you from your hiding spot.

Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?

Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?

Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?

No. None of my yanderes ever would as that is by far my biggest ick.

Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?

He would go rather far to do what needs to fully win you over. Or at least, what he thinks will win you over. He isn't desperate, though.

Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?

However long he deems is suitable for you to figure out he is an alien. If you figure it out by then, great and approach him about, that's probably when he'll go for it.

Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?

Rygel has extenstive psychic powers. This includes invading your mind. It makes it rather easy for him to essentially brainwash you into whatever he wants. But this is something he really doesn't deem necessary, as the mating bond will work eventually.

#yandere #starcrossedyanderes #romance #original character #yandere romance #yandere male #yandere oc #emperor rygel #yandere emperor #alien oc #yandere alien #alien #alphabet #yandere alphabet

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nectardaddy · 11 months ago

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Thirteen Years [Porco Galliard x reader] 2

** I will be using they/them pronouns throughout this book to make it as inclusive as possible. Of course, use whatever pronouns you use and go by. I simply put they/them as "umbrella" pronouns for all. Thanks for understanding and please enjoy!

I'm literally taking this shit right from my Wattpad because I'm lazy

One Month Prior

The male panted and wheezed, out of breath and struggling to breathe. The steam that emitted from both his former Titan body and his own were thick and covered the air around him. Blood dripped into his eyes from the wound on his head and partly covered the shifter marks above his eyes. The dark red marks stretching from the under eyes to his cheeks, and other jagged marks etched across his cheek bones special to only him. He struggled to get down, his Titan body left to disintegrate as he tried to place his feet on the ground. He felt weak and his vision was blurry, on the verge of passing out from over excursion and exhaustion.

The wounds he received were from his training, and nothing short of near death. The Marleyan officials were relentless, damaging him and working him just enough before death. He healed quickly, able to regenerate with ease if nothing injured his nape, and his superiors took advantage of the fact. They did with every Eldian Warrior, telling them "muscle has to break down before it becomes stronger." Despite their brutal tactics, this was an honor to him and deemed his training a necessary evil to be able to fight for the motherland.

His boot clad feet stepped down, finally, on the grass before he fell, unable to hold himself upright anymore. The officials turned and walked away, calling it a day, as the other Warriors went to his aid. Pieck and Zeke swiftly made their way over to the young man on the ground, but Reiner stayed behind and watched. The young woman who held the Cart Titan, whom also called Porco a friend, was the first one to his side. "Can you stand?" She asked softly and gently touched his arm, as if asking permission to help him up.

"I'm fine," he groaned out and jerked his arm, causing Pieck's hand to move. Zeke stood over the beaten and bloodied male, as he again tried to stand. The eldest of the Warriors empathized with the young man before him, each new Warrior had been in his state before. Porco shifted his position, putting his feet under him and using all of his strength to try and stand. Zeke's hand caught the male's arm just before he fell once more, and he pulled him up. He placed Porco's arm around his shoulder's and propped him up, helping him stand and when he was ready, to walk.

"Let's get you home," he commented generously. Zeke knew better than to crack jokes with the hotheaded blonde at a time like this, humor definitely wasn't Porco's coping mechanism. "What you need is a nice meal and a good night's sleep."

"What I need is for you to get off of me," he male snapped but couldn't find the strength to fight back. He felt helpless in this state, unable to move and barely able to take a deep breath. Zeke took a step and Porco struggled to follow, but soon found a broken rhythm that both worked for them. Pieck followed on the opposite side of Zeke, ready to catch the blonde if he so happened to fall. "Thank you," he mumbled, a rare sign of grace to his comrades that was well received by the pair helping him.

Porco regained more of his strength while walking and the wound on his head was almost closed by the time the trio had made it to the gate. "It looks like you're healing well," Pieck spoke with a soft smile after the gates to the internment zone had closed behind them. The blonde hummed as an answer before taking his arm off of Zeke's shoulder's and taking a step on his own. His steps were wobbly and slow, like a baby deer trying to walk for the first time.

"I wouldn't try walking just yet, unless you want to spend two hours hobbling to your house," Zeke's words made the young man groan, but he knew the man was right. He placed his arm, willingly, over the man's shoulder and limped along. His house wasn't far from the gate, but it was far enough to dread taking another step. His whole body ached, no longer damaged but still feeling the effects. The trio walked in silence as they finished the short path to the Galliard household.

Porco limped to his porch, no longer needing Zeke's aid, and sat on the last step of the three to the front door and let out a sigh. Zeke joined his friend and sat next to him, while Pieck looked down the road to another familiar house four doors down. "How are you and (Y/n) doing?" She asked before joining the two on the stairs. The name made his heart skip a beat, and he looked down the street to the house you occupied before shifting his gaze to the ground.

"What are you talking about?" He questioned as he looked over at her, a bit of confusion on his features. He was oblivious to his own feelings and the way he acted around you, he couldn't grasp what he felt but everyone around him was able to. Both Zeke and Pieck laughed softly at his question and another sigh passed his lips. "We're still friends if that's what you're asking," he added.

"How are they doing? I haven't seen them in so long," Zeke said, rephrasing the young woman's question. Now wasn't the time to get into how he felt, or how he didn't know he felt. The male was tired and needed rest, a long conversation about ones feelings and relationships wasn't the best in the situation.

"I talked with them a few days ago, they seemed fine. Normal, if you want to call it that," he spoke. "I wish I had more time then, we only spoke briefly. I was just so tired." He remembered you ending the conservation for him, telling him "go get some rest, Pock, we can talk later." He felt guilty having to leave so abruptly, but you saw the exhaustion written on his face. You cared more for his well being than a simple conversation, he was grateful.

The fact you were brought up in conservation in relation to him made him uneasy. He wasn't uncomfortable nor was he unsettled by it, but the thought of you puzzled him right down to his roots. He didn't enjoy not knowing how he felt, or better, not knowing what the feeling was. When brought up, a sickly sensation always made a way to his stomach. Marcel once called the feeling "butterflies," but it felt more like spiders. The way the feeling would slowly catch up to him and eat away until he caught himself stuttering and his face flushing made him frustrated. He wanted to be able to place his finger on the feeling and know exactly what it is. But he didn't know where to start, the feeling came from everywhere and nowhere alike. And he couldn't vocalize it either, finding it hard to find the correct words he wished to speak.

Zeke's words of acknowledgement to Porco's were cut off suddenly, "I can't stop thinking about them." He admitted softly, earning both Pieck and Zeke to glance at each other before he continued on. "I didn't realize how much they stay on my mind until I left; they're always there. I push the thoughts away and they always come back, I don't get it," his voice was laced with confusion and worry. He couldn't stop the thoughts of you from coming, frankly, it started to annoy him. He couldn't understand why the thoughts persisted.

"Well you did spend seven years with them, I think it's natural to think of someone you spent so much time with," Pieck treaded carefully. Talking to the young man was like walking through a mine field, one wrong move and it would cause an explosion. "Maybe you should tell them this, instead of telling us? I'm sure they'd love to hear it, they might even think the same way." She advised and grey eyes flickered over to her before trailing over, again, to your home.

"Maybe," he spoke simply, ending the conversation there. As he grew older, the more he didn't like to display his emotions. But the unknown terrified him; he could deal with pent up anger, sadness, and grief, what he couldn't handle was what he felt for you. He never realized the foreign emotion was intense until he left for his training, learning that being away from you was something that pulled at his heart strings. They were feelings he would once tell his brother about, Marcel telling him "you've got it bad" to which he wholeheartedly denied. Now beginning to speak to Pieck and Zeke about the peculiar emotion only made it writhe inside of him more. He started to loathe it, but also yearned for it.

Zeke stood up from the step he occupied, his joints cracking and popping from the wear and tear he received over the years. Pieck followed, getting up slowly from the step, still learning the differences of being bipedal even after so long. "Go eat and got some rest, Porco," he spoke before placing his hand on the seated male's shoulder. "We'll see you in the morning." With that, he took his hand away and turned, taking the path away from the Galliard house; Pieck following with a wave goodbye as she left.

The Warrior rested his elbows against his knees as he stayed seated, the sun setting behind the clouds. He didn't feel like eating nor did he feel like sleeping, he wanted to stay on the step and enjoy the outside like he used to. Like he did with his brother. Like he did with you. He remembered the times you would play soccer or kickball with the pair, tag, or any made up game that would pass the time. He couldn't help but smile softly thinking about the past, how well it treated him, how well it used to treat all of you.

The interment zone in Libero wasn't like anything you'd ever seen; it was better. Although the Marleyans despised your race, the zone was far cleaner and more suitable for living than the other you occupied. The three weeks since your family had moved were spent in solitude, you didn't know a single soul. You couldn't find it in yourself to step outside and join the children who played, afraid of what they might think of you.

"C'mon Pock! You're so slow!" A small, brunette, boy yelling made you turn your heard to see what was happening. You sat on your porch, alone, and played with the old toy carriage your parents had gifted you. The only toy in your possession: a small carriage and horse. The paint of the brown horse was chipped and part of the plastic tail was broken off, the carriage looked no better, missing a wheel and the top.

"I'm coming, shut up!" The blonde boy yelled back, running out of his door with a ball in his hands. You saw the two boys often when you peered through your window, always playing with the same ball and sometimes other children joining them. You were fascinated.

"Hey! Do you want to play with us?" You heard the brunette yell in your direction. You averted you gaze immediately once the boy's eyes met your own and looked down. Gripping the toy horse in your small hands from the anxiety of meeting new people. But the brunette persisted, and ran up to the edge of your porch, the blonde in tow behind him. "What's your name?" He asked excitedly, "I'm Marcel and this is my loser brother Porco," the blonde huffed and jabbed his brother's side. With a laugh, he continued, "you should come play with us!"

Your eyes flickered between the two boys as you gently placed your toy down. Marcel's eyes were wide and excited in contrast to his brother's, who's were happy but calm. It seemed the two brothers were exact opposites, one loud and outgoing and the other standoffish and quiet. The kindness of the pair made you smile softly, your eyes still trained on the ground. "I'm (Y/n), and sure I'll play with you."

He ran his pale fingers through his messy hair and hesitantly stood up, his legs still shaky and weak. With a sigh, he looked up to the now pink and orange painted sky and stared. He wanted to stay like this forever, keep this moment frozen in time. Although his body was in pain and he was covered his wounds, he felt at ease. He wanted his life to continue to be as serene as it was in this moment, but he knew all to well it wouldn't. He shifted his gaze to your home, watching as the wind blew through the tree placed beside the building. Shoving his hands in his pockets, he finally turned to walk inside. One day he would understand.

#porco x reader #aot porco #aot #aot x reader #attack on titan #snk #shingeki no kyojin

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elderberries-and-honey · 11 months ago

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Eep!! Wintertime asks! And for some of my favorite pixels at that! How about ❄️🧤🧦?

Can I just say I love that you included the little sock emoji in this game? It's such a cozy emoji to me but seldom do I get the chance to use it.

❄️: What is the most intricate or detailed thing you ever had to do for your story?

Oof, so far, probably setting up this scene here. It's part of the beach in Brindleton near the large 64 x 64 lot so every single thing you see had to be moved using T.O.O.L which in itself has been an intricate thing to learn. Thistle & Honey had to be posed carefully as well because there actually aren't that many poses for cats (at least that I've found).

This shot in particular was a huge pain in my butt trying to get both cats to be posed in Winifred's lap in a way that seemed believable for their skeletons.

🧤: If you could magically touch any of your OC’s to bring them to life who would that be?

Winifred by far. I've said it so many times but she is my favorite Sim ever. I'd love to just chat with her because she has so many qualities that even as her creator still surprise me. I'd also like to give honorable mention to Jackson because even though he's a side character, his sense of 'old man' humor makes me laugh.

🧦: Character you’d most (or least) like to swap places with?

Most would probably be Lawrence. He's so confident and calm. He really strikes me as someone who makes the best of any circumstance which is a trait that I do not possess.

Least would be a tie between Valerie & Alice (Winifred's Mum). Valerie copes with her lonliness with alcohol and will never get over her fear of depending on another person and Alice has had to make sacrifices for her daughter that no mother ever should. My heart hurts for both of them.

Send Me A Winter Wonderland Emoji Ask! ❄️

#answered #aheathen-conceivably #ask games

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killinggamebusters · 11 months ago

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Alright the humors worn out and now I'm gonna roast this anon entire manifesto before blocking them, TW under cut for lots of nastiness and mentions of torture and death threats and abuse, I shouldn't even give them this honor but honestly I want to be able to roast them forever and have something to point back too and also with my memory I'd start to question if this even happened and that's no fun!

"If you fully admitted that you ship abuse as a coping mechanism and DIDN'T glorify Ouma, didn't reblog shit about how "actually he and Gonta were totally good friends, even though Kokichi constantly abused him, drove him to despair and savored every moment of his execution". Kokichi is a subhuman monster and the only person in all fiction that ACTUALLY DESERVES to suffer through Gold Experience Requiem's infinite death loop. You are a disgusting piece of human garbage that fully deserves to die"

Incredibly funny of you to fucking put a jojo reference in you saying about how awful kokichi is, Dio is worse, I am shipping you with the anon who won't stop calling Kaito a rapist on one of my other blogs. Anyways he's a kiddo in a killing game with a murder total of like 2, he did bad things but, like, saying he's the worst character in all of fiction when making a jojo reference is fucking wild, Dio is right there!! Literally kicking dogs!!!!! Kokichi doesn't kick dogs and is thus an inherently better person

"Have you ever heard of a torture called scaphism? Here's the lovely description: "The king decreed that Mithridates should be put to death in boats; which execution is after the following manner: Taking two boats framed exactly to fit and answer each other, they lie down in one of them the malefactor that suffers, upon his back; then, covering it with the other, and so setting them together that the head, hands, and feet of him are left outside, and the rest of his body lies shut up within, they"

Wow you are so bad at actually explaining things within an ask, you could have summed this up in like 15 words, "its where they shut everything but your hands head and feet in a boat" get to the fucking POINT

"hey find his flesh devoured, and swarms of such noisome creatures preying upon and, as it were, growing to his inwards. In this way Mithridates, after suffering for seventeen days, at last expired." This is what you deserve. "Shou Tucker is totes a good father to Nina that loves her so so much and he TOTALLY HAD to turn her into a chimera because he had no other option" that's what you sound like. Kokichi is a worse person than fucking Junko, because at least Junko forced her classmates and"

God you took so many words to say "you should be eaten and suffer for 17 days" who caressss about the history oh my god im bored to TEARS. Also at least Kokichi's plan worked, Shou Tucker is the shittiest alchemist in the series. I'm also not even sure if this method would work, i would simple manage to get loose, i am built different mithridates.

What did this dude even do im curious now, PFF LOOKING IT UP YOU DIDN'T EVEN GET THE DETAILS RIGHT BITCH WHERE'S MY HONEY AND MILK, ITS NOT EVEN A REAL BOAT IT'S HOLLOW LOGS, there's no even real proof this torture even existed god you're bad at this you might as well shut me in an iron maiden , also the guy killed a guy i guess, I don't actually care, but anyway you wouldn't even do it right I'd be fine

"sister into a killing game BECAUSE SHE GENUINELY LOVED THEM and killing them and making them suffer was a way to bring herself as much despair as possible. Kokichi, however, is just a sadist that enjoys everyone's suffering and doesn't even feel despair when others die. Everything he does is for his own amusement, not for ANY altruistic motive. He PURPOSELY drove Gonta to despair just to see him suffer. He made him kill Miu just so he would see Gonta's despair when he's exposed and executed for"

Did she end the world because she loved them? did she have her sister murder an entire middle school out of love? Did she pluck a guys eye out of love and make him eat it out of love? Did she have the entire student council massacred out of love? Junko deserves better don't drag her into this, she wants to be seen as evil and despairing stop woobifying her it's hurting her. Kokichi's motive was survival, and even if you disagree with that, he says multiple times and in his final words how he was lying to himself to survive. However, even if that WASNT TRUE or it was ALL A LIE his death count is once again two whole people, Maki got two people killed out of sadism as well but I don't see you yelling about her. Even if he was the most evil person ever, he again, only got TWO PEOPLE KILLED, that's NOTHING. Even if he was a sadist who only wanted to torment and hurt people, he ain't the mastermind, and he didn't get to actually do a lot of tormenting. Everything you are saying about Kokichi, is just Junko, and you seem to love her. Hypocrite.

"for killing her. He ENJOYED EVERY SINGLE MOMENT of Gonta's suffering and anguish. Kokichi's crying for Gonta was so obviously fake it is sickening. And don't mention the DRS. They flattened Genocide Jack and Tenko's characters into "bYaKuYa!!!111" and "fUk MaLeS!!!!111" and portrayed Junko, Monaca and Kokichi as almost normal people and not the monsters they actually are in canon. So don't even talk to me like this somehow proves that Kokichi would be friends with Gonta outside the killing game."

Buddy who even brought up Danganronpa S? Wasn't me, they don't even have many interactions in DRS, everything I'm talking about here is straight from the base game don't worry. Also Monaca is like 10. You have got to get better at formatting this it's so hard to follow. Even if Kokichi enjoyed all that suffering, Mikan is right there, having her kills actually be about despair, and yet you only focus on Kokichi like this is a unique sin, curious.

"You deserve to rot in the garbage, eaten by maggots. You don't deserve to be treated as a human being, to have human rights. You are a piece of garbage. You deserve to have your bones shattered and left to rot in a garbage container.You are an abuse apologist and a victim blamer.Kokichi just used Gonta as a tool because Gonta's nonexistent social skills, his low self esteem and desire to do ANYTHING to be useful, to finally be able to help his friends made him a perfect target for Kokichi."

I am at MOST an abuse apologist by your logic as I have never once said Gonta deserved to die, just that Gonta made his choice and even afterwards of getting caught he didn't regret it. It's not abuse though, it never was abuse, abuse is a PATTERN of behavior, one incident, two if you count the meet and greet, is not enough to set that pattern in stone. Especially when Gonta already got his revenge for the meet and greet.

While Gonta was the perfect target, it's not abuse, that's not what abuse is. Kokichi flashed Gonta with the light and told him his plan, while he definitely was manipulative, that's not abuse. You're just spouting buzzwords at this point. Also incredibly funny to call ME the abuse apologists when YOU'RE sending me graphic death threats, like buddy, I don't know how to tell you that you're the aggressor here

Kokichi never cared about Gonta.You deserve to die a slow, agonizing death by getting your guts pulled out. Everyone would be happy if you died. Everyone. Your father, your mother, your siblings, you are just a burden for them. They would be really happy if you died.

HA that's so fucking weak, you don't know me or my situation, you don't know my friends. Sorry you have friends who would disown you for shipping something they don't like, my friends enable and care about me. While my parents are incredibly patient and kind with me. Getting my guts pulled out is kinda erotic though can you do it tenderly for me? I mean not like I'd ask you, I know exactly which friend I'd go to if I wanted someone to hold my guts tenderly.

Gonta himself said that he doesn't trust Kokichi anymore after Chapter 2's events. Most likely, he doesn't even consider Kokichi his friend. I don't know where you the idea that they were "FRIENDS UWU" in any way. They weren't. Kokichi's tears for Gonta were clearly COMPLETELY FAKE, only meant to give his evil rant more impact to maake others believe that maybe he did care about Gonta after all only to make his reveal more painful. It very clearly ISN'T genuine in any way.

Boy howdy I love how things are up to interpretation in this series and how people can have rational discussions about how they perceive the same event. Just kidding, you're unhinged! Anyways you can not trust someone but also still care about them Gonta did not want Kokichi to die, Gonta cares about all of his classmates, Gonta cares. To assume otherwise goes against everything Gonta stands for. He's not a toddler, he can have nuance about people. He's a smarter lad then you give him credit for.

Gonta was groomed and manipulated into becoming a murder weapon. He's not to blame for Miu's death AT ALL. Gonta was manipulated. Manipulation isn't just forcing someone to do it with a threat. Kokichi wrongfully convinced him that it was for the better, taking advantage of Gonta's low self-esteem and desperation to help others. You've never been manipulated or abused in your life if you're saying Gonta could've just declined. It's not easy to just decline your abuser. Abusers can pressure you

Not what grooming means in the slightest but thanks for trying. You're just repeating yourself at this point, pathetic. Everyone was desperate that trial, what happened is a tragedy, but to deny Gonta any blame is to deny Gonta any agency he is not a helpless toddler. He is AWARE Kokichi is a liar, he is AWARE of what Kokichi does, and even if he is manipulated, he categorically does not regret as alter ego gonta, he's so sad it happened, but he still thinks its for the best they don't know the truth. Gonta agreed with Kokichi that there is no happy ending with the knowledge of the outside world.

And as for when Gonta says "Don't blame Kokichi anymore", you'd be a complete moron to trust GONTA in this situation. Gonta is THE LEAST VALID PERSON to trust in this case. Have you ever heard of Stockholm Syndrome? Many real-life cases of abuse have similar patterns of victims. While Stockholm syndrome is commonly associated with a hostage or kidnapping situation, it can apply to abusive relationships, when the abuse victim begins to express love for their abuser.

Stockholm Syndrome isn't fucking real, it's a fun trope, but it was not, and never was real. Please do research. It's basically the modern day hysterical woman, oh my god. Even if it was true, that's not how it is even theorized to work, the plan took place over like, less then an hour, that's not enough time for ANYTHING to set in. For what you're theorizing to even have a chance to be true they would have to be locked together in this scheme for DAYS. Please google fawn response as well, you'd have better luck making a point with that.

Gonta says to not blame Kokichi because Gonta knows he made his own choice, and would make it again, and most importantly, he wants everyone to GET ALONG. He doesn't want Kokichi to be hated, he wants everyone happy. This isn't him being "omg kokichi is so special rawrxD" its "im going to die, and all i ever wanted was everyone here happy, so please, don't hate each other"

And then I guess the spam filter or whatever stopped them from sending anymore because that's a weird place to end it. Anyways this was very cathartic for me and I may do a research paper on this in the future.

TLDR; we should like, have kids and see what they think of gonta and ouma that'd be fascinating

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polishedforsurvival · 3 months ago

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4,5,18

Ask My Muse About Death | Not Accepting | @thecommanderzoe

4. If you were reborn as someone/something new, who or what would you want to be?

His brow knits as he takes in the question. It feels like a pointless thing to humor; he's pretty sure he's not going to be reborn as anything. It'd be a lie to say he's never thought about how he could've turned out if he'd been born different though, born under different circumstances. If he'd still be the person he is today, if he'd still turn out the same way, if all that's happened to him, didn't happen.

Probably not, but then, would he even want that? Would he still be as hardened, as strong, as tough of a survivor? If the horrible things that awakened that power inside him never happened, if he didn't have this strength that burdens him, would he still be so important to humanity? Would they still have made it this far? Would he have made it this far?

That's not the question though, is it? Reborn. Another chance at life after this, at least, he thinks that's what they mean. Even in these silly hypotheticals, he can't stop prioritizing his own damn usefulness to others.

"Maybe someone a little less abnormal."

5. If you do believe in the afterlife, what kind of afterlife do you think awaits you?

"I don't know what I believe," he's surprisingly quick to admit. Levi never thought about it much growing up; given the state of the world around him, he assumed that if you died, you died, your heart and brain stopped and there was nothing after. You were just gone, another corpse to add to the pile of fucking filth in the Underground.

Part of him still feels that way, with all the death around him. He's not a religious man and never has been, doesn't have the time nor care nor need. But as he continues to lose those he's fought alongside, and the way they use those deaths to push on despite it all (because what other way can you honor them?)-- sometimes there's a thought, a fleeting feeling, that they're still watching, somehow, from beyond.

He doesn't know what it is, if it's anything at all, or just a way to cope in those rare vulnerable moments. But if there's anything to it, the softer part of his heart hopes their view is from somewhere comfortable, and quiet, and peaceful.

"And I don't care what happens to me after. If there's anything, I'll end up where I end up. Either way, I'm dead."

But if there is something after, then he does, quietly, hope he finds himself standing beside them, once more.

18. Do you believe the dead ever come back to walk the earth?

"No." The answer comes without much hesitation. Sure, he's seen titan shifters avoid death and survive things no person should survive; he's watched someone come back from the brink of it with a serum he injected with his own hands. Things that once upon a time may have looked like the dead coming back, before they knew better. But maybe it still is, in some screwed up way. They'd be dead otherwise, right? And who knows, maybe there's some fucked titan power they don't know about yet that can do that. Wouldn't put it past them, at this point.

But his mind wanders from that, and instead to the faces of those they've lost. That he's lost. One in particular. "The dead are dead. Let them rest."

#thecommanderzoe #asks #when you have to do all the heavy lifting bc your muse refuses to elaborate and 90% of his thoughts stay in his head THANKS L.EVI #anyway casually ignoring that this was sent two years ago and breaking my heart a little before bed

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gxbtx · 3 months ago

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Peter Cat Recording Co. at The Echo Lounge

Dallas, Tx, September 22nd

This past weekend I was honored to be able to experience the Peter Cat Recording Co in the flesh, with their performance of songs from their newest album, Beta. This album was released a hefty 5 years after their last studio album, Bismillah. After the new-found success during COVID-19, the Dahli based band went on to perform for their new-found fanbase on the Good Luck Beta Tour 24. They are in the process of traveling to perform a total of 77 shows across three continents, selling out a majority of these venues to varied crowds.

Peter Cat Recording Co. performing at The Echo Lounge in Dallas for a crowd of about 200 people

I can best describe Peter Cat Recording Co. (PCRC) as an Indian psychedelic jazz band, taking elements of sounds transcontinental to create a movie like experience with their studio albums. Having about a decade of tenure as a band, they come to offer an evolved sense of introspection, utilizing so many different instruments to create soundtracks to the life of struggle and other complex sentiments alike. Such as seen in A Portrait of a Time: 2010-2016, they metaphorically paint pictures of a time period in their lives in which they conceptualize their feelings in regards to aspects of the human experience by making fun of their own turmoil.

PCRC displays typical traits of a band, such as guitars, bass, drums, and keyboards, but then adds flairs of color with less common instruments such as the clarinet, accordion, saxophone, and even a banana shaker!

The show started on the song “Flowers R Blooming”, starting off the show on the foundational lessons they center their themes around; through lyrics of “For Changing Is Living/And Living is Love”, they share a valuable insight into a perspective of living far more fulfilling and redeeming in this game we call life. This song broke tears out of me, fostering an emotional connection to the band that seems rare for me to encounter. This song gave me an outlet of emotions to express that recognition in who I am is the best thing I can do to spread love to myself and others.

In maturing comes sacrifice, and ultimately growth in our ability to cope and humor our sensitivities in our emotions; PCRC audiolizes (I just created a new word!) these lessons such as in the leading single “People Never Change” where they renounce the power of others to impact our moods and confidence. He reverses this happier tune with a melancholy song “Heera” from their previous studio album reflecting a low point in the singer’s life, standing at a crossroads of whether it’s too late to “live a lovely life”. The hollow guitar riff being repeated with the dissonant tones of keyboard make it out to have a ghoulish feeling from this time period. As expanded upon within his band, growing up is demonstrated in coming to terms with your emotions and wearing them on full display, becoming sensible in the process, which is what Lifafa demonstrates when he lets loose and dances along to his pain in the guitar riff.

The combination of lights tastefully adds to the psychedelic feelings filling up the room, keeping the audience invested in the growth of the artistic messages

I appreciate the diversified sounds this band created, as the lead singer Lifafa has described the instrumentation to be specially tailored to the idea of what the song’s goal is. The creative process of starting with the idea of the song, leads the band to switch around instruments to what feels right. While members progressively came and went towards the inception of the band, the 5 members we see have become comfortable together for 6 years. The versatility reeks of the experience this band has come to acquire, providing quite an alluring experience to the dedicated audience. The Echo Lounge in Dallas venue notably accommodated PCRC elegantly, having a sophisticated theater-like quality that felt appropriate to the presentation of family established in the heartfelt odes.

Guitar player Kartik Pillai went up to play “Foolmuse,” the third leading single for Beta

On my ever-prolonged journey of learning what it takes to be a man and to be the best me I can be, this band shares valuable perspectives that come from a long pipeline of experience and wisdom cross-culturally. In Beta, their new project released earlier last month, they further their documented maturation in life coming to share feelings associated with love and connection, as well as overcoming anxious thoughts that keep us from seeing the absolute beautiful world we see around us. Although the music can sometimes seem long and heavy, I believe PCRC displays an excellent feat of music in connecting time into thoughtful reflections of their humanity - and in a way that connects us to our own.

To read my RadioUTD finalized version, go to https://radioutd.com/blog/2024/10/peter-cat-recording-co-at-the-echo-lounge-in-dallas/

#peter cat recording co.#psychedelic rock #jazz #contemporary music #contemporary jazz #Dahli #music #connection #local shows #show review #introspective #humanity #musician

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