#they can sometimes be so completely heartwrenching

[iamthewanderingbard]

I love Lucy and Elissa so goddamn much. They are so much fun to write for. 🤣👏

[causenessus]

love notes

part 0.05. intros

EXHIBIT TWO: RIDE OR DIE BROS FOR LIFE

suna rintarou °❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

middle blocker for the msby volleyball team and wanted to major in something art related but ended up going into athletic training with sakusa. in high school, atsumu, osamu, and him would very frequently sneak out at night usually to graffiti a wall and atsumu and him have kept up the tradition. whenever they travel to other cities to play an away game, they’ll try and find the time to go out and leave their mark on the city. in college, he started to do things like leave little snippets of lyrics from romantic songs on walls in sharpie or spray paint </3 he first met y/n in high school and they didn't talk much despite being in the same friend group. he a her from afar but never said anything because he didn’t feel like she knew him well enough that she would return his feelings if he told her. as a result, ever since graduation, he’s been finding small ways to be closer to her. although he isn’t majoring in art, he started to hang around the art department more, and would follow her around whenever she came to develop photos. she’d let him come with her into the department’s dark room and explain the process to him. he tries his best to listen but most of the time he get distracted while looking at her <3 eventually he started to invite her to come wander the city with him in search of street art and told her he’d start sending her photos of art that he found in other cities (which he's totally not making and then sending to her as if he's just randomly stumbled upon the most heartwrenching, romantic art ever). as long as he’s with her he couldn't care less what they're doing; to him, the real artwork is right next to him <3 she’s taking photos of something written on a wall while he’s looking at her <3

miya atsumu & miya osamu °❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

atsumu

setter for msby <3 made his bio in retaliation to his brother and then got upset when osamu didn’t care. didn’t even want to go to college but really wanted to play for msby and didn’t want to be left out of everyone else going to school so he’s chilling in communications with bokuto. loves to come to onigiri miya on days y/n works because she gives him discounts and he jokes that she’s a better cook than osamu (which psychologically, for him, is probably true. samu cooks for tsumu and curses the food while y/n tries to put at least a little bit of love into what she makes for him). at some point tried to flirt with y/n and then realized she did not love when he visited because of him but bc he would bring suna. often comes by himself to onigiri miya or brings bokuto with him to ask yn how things with suna, completely ignoring the fact that she has a boyfriend (which leaves her confused about every single life choice she's made) and then will immediately text suna being like “y/n and me are talking about u rn LL sucks to suck i bet ur wondering what she thinks of u"

osamu

always gives suna discounts when he comes and will immediately take over whatever order y/n is working on so that she can make suna’s foof <3 he’s like a double agent for both sides but doesn’t get too involved because things with suga are making it difficult. he’s definitely someone suna goes to a lot for advice and although suna tends to only come on days when y/n works, sometimes on late nights after practice when osamu is the only one left working, suna will come in and they’ll share a drink and talk about y/n and more

bokuto koutarou & oikawa tooru °❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

bokuto

wing spiker for msby and self proclaims himself as the ace <3 sakusa and him beef a little bit about it but the entire team is made up of doubles anyway so they kind of share the title. he’s matching users with atsumu and oikawa and also asked akaashi if they could have matching headers <3 akaashi sent him his current header which bokuto immediately started using <3 my guy has got so many friends and is loved by everyone so he’s actually having the best time of his life in college!!! besides when exams come around. then he’s hiding under a table and it takes the collective effort of akaashi, atsumu, and oikawa’s to get him out.

oikawa

second setter for msby! atsumu and him actually lowkey connected immediately and the team often uses a 6-2 rotation to utilize two setters and it’s been working out pretty well. other volleyball teams quiver hearing about msby’s lineup LMAO. he’s also a photography major which has led to suna often asking him how y/n is doing <3 does a lot of portraits and posts his works on a separate photography account. has started to join atsumu and suna when they sneak out while on away games to find somewhere to leave a piece of art.

extras <3

suna, atsumu, osamu, bokuto, and oikawa all live together

it is either very peaceful or a living hell

atsumu and bokuto will get riled up about something together and start having an energetic burst while suna isolates in his room (or more often is slipping out to go hang with y/n)

oikawa’s pretty chill and is in his actually-studying-for-exams era

osamu’s usually busy at work

so it’s peaceful (according to their definition) when not everyone is home but sometimes atsumu will start beefing with osamu about something and shit hits the fan

suna is heavily heavily heavily inspired by this guy named @/greg_goya on instagram

when i had this idea for street art i really spent an hour on instagram and google combined looking for this guy bc the art he does is totally what i was going for

and when i say inspired i mean suna is literally greg goya. i will probably use screen shots from my man greg in this smau so ty to him in advance he's a king 👑

both "exhibits" or friend groups are lowkey one big friend group but there's a small natural divide bc most of the ride or die bros are from inarizaki and some of them (cough atsumu cough bokuto cough suna if he didn't want to be around y/n 24/7 cough) said that they NEEDED a bros only gc

taglist: @wyrcan @oyasumeii @froyaoya @gyuijns @nbcvs @milkteade @eggyrocks @0moonii @guitarstringed-scars @makkir0ll @mylahrins @cherrypieyourface @vivian-555 @sharkerino @bluebeanbee @r0seandth0rns @staileykout @lunavixia @thvvluvr @elliott0o0 (form to be added to taglist! <3)

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[wayfayrr]

This fic was originally inspired by the song Kerosene by tart, as it fits got the strong vibe of a yandere needing more in my opinion and I would recommend listening to it while reading <3 but eventually it spiralled into a full on self-aware sky x reader

And with that tone, they ask me 'If I'm ready…'  

Impatiently asking me to throw away my entire life for them, to cast aside everything I've ever known for the chance, the meagre chance, to stay in Hyrule. To join their duet of death, a fight that seems never-ending.

With only Sky offering me an alternate way, offering instead something more valuable than his own life to me. The offer to follow me, of his own regard instead of a twisted love demanding it of me. 

Yet, still sitting here with Sky has its own charm to it. I don't feel pressured to talk or do anything unlike how it can get with the others at times.

"You know my dove, with a touch of your life I was filled with envy… The fact that I haven't been able to live with you, know you longer than I have. I scare myself sometimes."

His chuckle wasn't as reassuring as he would thought it should be if he were trying to be reassuring to me. He could just be nervous after what he simply just admitted to. I know I would be.

"How would you scare yourself with that Sky..?"

"..."

"... I don't - It's just - I… Sometimes I uh- have thoughts. This really isn't easy to say."

Why is he looking at me like I should already know what he’s talking about like he’s going on about an inside joke? 

“It was a catastrophe, as a result of your sanguine vanity. Your confidence that everything was just a game, when you really knew better didn’t you?”

“...Knew better? What do you mean?”

“That I could see you… that from the moment outside the academy when I was told what buttons you would need to press to control me I started to connect everything, that I was alright with you being the one who had this ability to puppet me? You knew, didn’t you? You fell in love with me at the same time didn’t you?”

“Sky I - I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Is he - No he can’t be. He couldn’t have known he was in a game. He can’t have been in love with me since then… even if he did know… He should hate me. At best, this is some broken-down mechanical love, some remnant of stray code… Oh what am I doing lying to myself, nintendo made Link as a blank slate, there would never have been any failsafe like that. Because it shouldn’t be possible for him to become self-aware.

“When I first woke up that day it was like there was this other part of me, you it was you, but it didn’t take me long to realise that you weren’t a part of me. You were you and you could control my every single action.”

“My world at that point was a plaything for you but I wouldn’t have had it any other way.  I didn’t need to eat nor sleep when you were there for me, it was like I was complete. I was blinded by looking for Zelda for so long that I wasted the time I could’ve spent just basking in you.”

“I love you more than I need to breathe because you complete me… but you don’t feel the same.”

“Because I’m just a toy to you aren’t I? Be-because you left me. You just left, you left me behind and didn’t come back.”

Everything, he knows everything. Where do I start, how do I handle this? I can’t leave him spiralling like this, it’s not fair to him. Would he even believe what I’ll tell him? Do I want to tell him? 

“Sky I’m not going to lie to you. I did see you as just a game, I didn’t know that you were a person that you were alive. But I know better now. You’re not just a toy.”

“But I was just that to you…  you - you were just like a god that was sent from above to help me in my darkest moments. I didn’t- I mean I know, I shouldn’t have been able to have known any of that but I just - I don’t - I- I don-”

Tapering off into the most heartwrenching sobs after all of that isn’t something I could ever have imagined coming from the hero of the skies. I can’t comfort him. I’m not a monster.But I’m not a god either. Even if that’s what he saw me as, even though that’s what he wants me to be.  

“Sky I’m not a god. I never was, but I do care about you, I’ve said it before and seeing as you need to hear it now more than ever. I love you Sky. The you, I’ve gotten to know over this whole thing with the shadow.”

“But I - [Name] I just -”

“I know this is a lot to go through. It must’ve been absolute torture going through all of that. Can you breathe for me? I’m here to listen to you but I can’t if you’re too stressed to speak properly.”

“I - Thank you.”

The tears staining his face are starting to dry now, leaving streaks as proof of his own sadness, ones that have too much emotion behind to have been faked. All of this has to be true, there’s too much detail on things I’ve never mentioned to him for him to be lying to me based on one thing he’s heard about my own world. Which means he’s been aware of me for so much longer than he’s let on. That he might have known me for far longer than he’s let on. There’s no safe way to ask this now though so I’ll just have to hope he brings it up on his own. 

“I first figured out that I was this character after the dream I had about demise, after I woke up, when Horwell was talking to me about the lost remlit and how he told me to press z to target him, not even calling me by my name he called me Sky. But what made it even worse is I could remember fighting demise, making up with Groose and getting the triforce yet I was back to the start and being called something different.”

“That’s when you knew? Did you realise it was me immediately or did that take longer? You don’t have to answer of course, just talk about what you’re comfortable with Link.”

His breathing is slowly evening out now, clearly his earlier panic is starting to subside. Although now I don’t have my past option of being able to move away from him anymore, not with how he’s leaned all his weight against my side in, if he wasn’t so deeply upset about all of this, what I could call a desperate attempt to keep me by him. With all of this only seemingly proved more by how he’s tangling his fingers in mine to hold my hand tightly against his chest. 

“I first knew it was you when Zelda pushed me off that landing again. Your disgust at her doing that, at her not trusting me even though you already knew it was going to happen at that point. It wasn’t until I was first in the temple with Fi that I saw you properly though. I couldn’t even spare more than a second to bask in your beauty because, well I was scared that if I acted too differently from what you expected then you would just abandon me, but I wanted too more badly than anything. What I wouldn’t have given at that time to just have been able to spare more than a simple glance at you. Who I wouldn’t have killed to get the faintest chance to simply hold you.”

“...What was that last thing you said?”

“What do you mean my dove? The fact I would’ve given anything to spare a glance at you?”

“No that other thing you said.”

“That I couldn’t act differently out of fear that you would abandon me to a lifeless world where everyone was acting like soulless husks only repeating the same line over and over and over.”

“No that very- you know what, don't worry about it.”

The last remains of his tears finally fade away now as he nuzzles himself further into my shoulder and brings up our intertwined hands to kiss my own. Drawing out the moment as long as he can, fitting as he’s spent so long pining for this very touch. What’s going unsaid here is more than enough to be unsettling now, with how overbearing his feelings are getting and how desperate and cheery he’s sounding now. It’s a terrifying combination.

“I realised pretty quickly that it was your second playthrough. That I’d missed out on basking in you because I was too focused on saving Zelda,  but now I’m done with saving. I don’t want to go back to my own world, I don’t want to go back to her with how she’s always asking for more. I wish I could’ve just crawled through the screen and into your arms instead; burn away my past but I never could. I was stuck in that damned game, watching as you were so happy with me even though I wasn’t a person to you - just a toy. I could hear all the things you were saying from you complaining about your day, to how you kept calling me your precious baby girl.”

“Oh so… you heard everything… everything I was saying?”

“Everything. From the sweeter things like when you would apologize for me getting hurt even though I would never have held it against you, to how you thought I looked good in 'that green', how you'd let me do that to you as I finished off a skulltula, even how you thought ghirahim was fatherless. By far the best things to hear were you just talking about your own life, hearing you going on about your day made me feel more real than anything else did. I could imagine myself there with you, as a real part of your life.”

The chill down my spine at that admission didn’t go unnoticed by him as he coiled tighter into my side as if he was attempting for my touch to consume him fully. Like he’s gotten a taste of this touch and he’s wanting some more, like a hit of kerosene or something sweeter. 

"I don't want to go back to how it was before [name], I can't go back to Skyloft. I don't ever want to be pulled apart from you again, because when you finished the game? it felt like nothing was worth anything any more. I'm convinced I would have been better off dead than how I was without you."

He seemed not to be fond of my stunned silence, even still he respected it, letting me have precious moments to gather my thoughts. To say what? Where would I begin with handling this? I can’t question him, he’s so fragile right now and I’m too scared to break him. Maybe just…

“I’m sorry, Sky I’m so sorry. I’m sorry that I didn’t know earlier… that I couldn't help you through all of that, that I didn't treat you like an actual person. Is there any way I could possibly make it up to you?"

If that wasn't the best worst thing to say then, I don't know what I could have said instead. Luckily he seemed to like it if how he’s burning himself further into my side is anything to go off of, proven more by the contented hum he’s let out. 

“Please, just don’t leave me again - I- I won’t hold it against you if it's not your own choice, like how the shadow brought you here to me, but I never want to have to be apart from you again. I want to go back to your own world with you, a brand new life with you is all I need.”

“I promise link, I won’t leave you of my own choice from now.”

“If anything happens so that you get torn away from me - can you start a new save on your switch?”

“What..?”

What good could that be - what if it only made things worse? What if that got rid of his memories? No. [name] you have to trust him on this. He knows so much more about it, he’s the one who’s lived this. If that’s what he thinks the right option is. Then it’s the best option.

“If you make a new save then this time - this time I won’t have to be worried about you overreacting and deleting me - I don’t know if I’ll be able to talk to you -  There has to be some way I can get out of that game and into your arms again my dove. I just know it.”

[slaygentford]

Grace’s love is heartwrenching she knows Louis is gay and doesn’t care but she can’t tell him she knows obviously so when she was like bring around your boyfriend (because she wants to meet this guy Louis is obviously infatuated with) she’s not quite teasing him because if she does he’s so skittish he’ll go cold on her and shut down and get angry but she almost is. She almost is. She’s teasing him just as much as she can get away with because it’s sweet and funny and embarrassing to see her brother like this when he’s never been like this before. and every subsequent time after that until Louis irrevocably fucks up their relationship she’s like is it still…. YES ITS LESTAT like girl just give her an update. She loves her big brother so much. “You know my situation.” YES SHE DOES!!! And she’s just asking!!! She misses you and she doesn’t trust that man! Grace’s pov of this story is insane. Louis isn’t a deeply depressed botched vampire to her he’s her funny and loving big brother being absorbed by a complete stranger and becoming that stranger. How many times did she see Lestat in passing over the years. How horrible that arch face became to her. How sickening that placid smile. And Louis becoming marble beside his marble spouse, two stone pharaohs, time blowing across them like sand, sometimes hiding them for years at a time……………….. Deeply satisfying version of this where Grace discovers what lestat did to her brother and she stomps him to death and then sets him on fire btw

[shavynel]

Writing comments for fanfic

tl;dr -- Write one thing you liked about the fic (a phrase or moment) and how you reacted or made you feel! Also, keep it fun! Make no demands of fic authors who write out of love and Owe Us Nothing.

It took me a while to figure out how to write comments. I went through an evolution. There's lots of stuff on how to write stories, probably even giving crit and feedback, but commenting? Not nearly as much. So here's my not so short ramble on writing comments for fic. Includes my Ways of commenting and Tenets of commenting.

Examples here will be T-rated (by AO3 standards) and most are taken from or newly written with specific fics in mind. They are, ahem, almost all Genshin Impact.

Commenting is, I believe, a personal thing. I've been told I have a bit of an enthusiastic presence, so what feels true to you may vary. I also like to write words (can you tell?). And smash keyboards.

Leaving comments is, in fact, effort! But it's also a skill that can be learned and honed. And honestly, I think my fic experience is improved by it. I don't always leave a comment. But, I don't know... that random internet person authored a Whole Thing. For Free (likely). And I just get to read it?? Yeah, I'm going to leave a little appreciation. Just a little snack in return for this fulfilling meal you have fed me.

I also find writing a comment is also a way for me to just bask in a fic a little bit longer, linger in that feeling of oh, wow, this was so good, and I don't want to leave yet. (And then sometimes there's a response, and then I get a bonus dose of nostalgia!)

Ways of commenting

These are roughly ordered by amount of effort required. I would say the comments I leave are a mash up of these, really. There aren't actual hard lines between them.

1. An extra kudos.

Kudos are nice. Knowing the kudos button isn't enough is one layer deeper! Comments like

"Thanks for writing!" "<3" "i mash kudos button but no more kudos come out what's wronnnnggg????" "yay an update!" "this is so good"

Level of effort: slightly more than a kudos.

Honestly, copy-pasteable. Personally, I would always write these out. Somehow, to me, as a commenter, feels more real if I tippy tappy the letters myself even if Author can't tell. It's a nice way to let an author know you're coming back chapter after chapter when we can only kudos once on a fic. I like to leave a little something more, but I still often start or end with this.

2. Fic reaction.

Sometimes a fic just leaves me a certain way. Invoked a particular mood or visceral reaction. So, I let the author know!

"Awww, my heart is warm!" "Jaw on ground. WTF!" "Literal chills." "My eyes are wet. How did that happen?" "This fic is pure comfort." "AHHHHHHHHHHH!" "Heart on floor, smashed." "WHOLESOME!" "This has left me completely feral and ready to punch something."

Level of effort: you need some emotional intelligence or other awareness of you reactions.

As a starting point, was the fic -- wholesome, sweet, chaotic (in a good way), funny, heartwrenching, sad, delightful, shocking, calm, peaceful, I just want a hug now, terrifying, creepy, comedic?

How do you then turn this into a comment? "This was so ___!!"

Honestly, my crutch here is to just keyboard smash. What does it mean? Your guess as good as mine. I'm speechless, and I cannot words properly, but please participate in these Feels I'm having.

3. One detail I like. (My default comment style)

This one covers a lot of scope. If I read to the end of the fic, there's probably something I liked. Maybe

a turn of phrase. "Diluc drinking grape juice like a man chained to an interrogation table. sfjfskkdz" "Bedsheets twisted up like cooked spinach is SO accurate." "Itto-to is such a cute mashup name!" "We have years ahead of us. That was just one day in the past. The feeeeeelllssss" ":) as punctuation" "Barbatos and Nobles as a bookstore. Sdjjsfjdw I love it"

a particular character moment, action, interaction, or dialogue. quote or paraphrase it! "Diluc kicking Childe into the water was hilarious." "Childe is such an adrenaline junkie. I can't believe he would lean out the window while he was driving." "I'm so proud of Zhongli for actually admitting his feelings!"

some specific moment you emotionally reacted to. I've only recently trained myself out of stoic facing through fic. I mean, it's a useful skill, don't get me wrong (especially in public), but it's less useful when it's just me by myself. I now laugh at 3am reading fic, and my life is brighter for it. Comedy fic writers, you are my fave. "Can't get over when Diluc walks in on Kaeya and Childe. AHHHHH!" "Qiqi drying Childe's hair was so sweet!"

Level of effort: you have to actually remember something you liked or reacted to.

The number of movies I watch and number of times someone asks how's my week, and I just stare blankly because I know it was good but don't know anything else? High. So yeah, this isn't trivial.

I've gotten to the point where usually while reading I notice a moment of "wow I love this!" I don't go looking for them (because I want to stay in fic headspace not comment material hunting headspace), and I don't spend much effort trying to remember. If I forget, that's fine. Not like I'm not writing a book review for a grade or anything.

Just, what's a moment you just got to call out? (And bonus, what's your reaction?) Authors out there seem to like to make us feel things. Show them we're just dangling from their puppet strings!

I usually leave comments like this. Just popcorn style, as many things as I remember, whatever comes up as I recall it. I'm aware that sometimes I end up basically quoting a fic back to its author completely out of order interspersed with commentary or keyboard smashes. I'm occasionally embarrassed by how much I'm smashing into their comments, but the reception seems overall positive.

4. Between the lines and spin off thoughts.

Sometimes fic make me think. I mean, canon makes me think, and then people go and make fanworks off of that, so of course I'm bound to run into fic that makes me think. Sometimes the things I notice or think about aren't directly in the text, but implied or spin out thoughts. An interpretation, a mini analysis, or a reflection. Like,

a new thought or take on a character. "Aro-ace Venti! I like this take!" "Please don't break Klee. She's just trying her best to hold all the adults together. Oh no. You've already broken Klee. T_T" "I bet Jean is the only person who could have kicked Diluc's ass, and he really needed it." "Kaeya what are you doooinggg?? Why is he like this???" (An extra note, it's cool to disagree with a character, but not the author. Character did that makes you want to scream? Go for it. Author wrote the character in a way you disagree with? Don't comment. Leave the fic if it bothers you that much.)

noticing foreshadowing or a detail that isn't fully explained / only alluded to. "Is that Scara working at Scarabucks???" "Wait, something about what Venti said makes me think this isn't just a modern day AU ..." "Did that count as a geo construct for the purposes of the contract?"

some sentence or moment somewhere that just hits you in the brain. This one I don't actually know if author's like. On the one hand, I can imagine it being flattering. On the other, maybe it's too personal? I'll usually center these on the characters, kind of like character analysis. "Diluc sharing his anxiety with Kaeya, and that being what made Kaeya look at his own anxiety... really hits. Like, I don't even think Diluc could have said something sooner without Kaeya running, which says so much about how Diluc loves Kaeya. And the fact Kaeya can see this as a mirror of what he's doing and learns something from it. Just. Oof. Wow." "The conversation between Zhongli and Childe is just so real. Like Zhongli is trying so hard but his ass just can't understand Childe just wants him to tell them things and his not telling things is Not Helping even though he just wants to protect the boy!"

Level of effort: some amount of analytical thinking, reflection, or willingness to share when you get sucker punched by words.

This one I absolutely never go looking for, so I don't leave many such comments. When it does come up, it usually smacks me in the face, and I let it (roll with the hit and into the comments). On occasion I am wailing in the comment box when the revelation (like having broken Klee) just dawns on me. Am I Feelings Processing in comment boxes? Uuuhhhhhh, no comment. (Don't mind the lack of delivery on the pun.)

I'd like to think authors appreciate when we reflect back to them we get their interpretation, but I can also imagine it might be a little too much for authors if we get too personal. In which case, sorry. Your work is great! Please take it as my intention to flatter you since you've touched my heart or brain or soul with your words.

5. Craft appreciation.

This one, *head scratches* yeah, I don't often end up here. But sometimes it's not one moment, but something about all the moments, something underlying, or something in the way it was all put together. If I do end up here and write a general statement, I like to point to specific bits that made me think that (which is where I lean back on One Detail I Like). Actually, yeah, usually I use this as flavor to One Detail I Like, but I think it's sufficiently different to pull out separately. It's a writerly meta layer. What falls here?

dialogue. "Your dialogue is so good. I can hear it in in the VA's voice." "I love the contrast between how Zhongli talks and Childe talks."

imagery. "Can't get over the imagery of Childe releasing dandelion scenes. Such a kid!" "Childe sleeping with Tranquil Statlight is just so peaceful."

characterization. "The little nuggets you give characters like Rosaria doing community service at the church for Crimes just gives me life." "I love the way you write Childe. He's so aggressive!"

setting, world building (more for AUs but wow there are some authors good at expanding on canon lore). "Your world building is so cool. Like the abyssal graffiti on the walls?? HNNG!"

writing style. "Your style is very dreamy. <3" "This is genuinely so heartwarming, and yet at the same time what is this underlying feeling of something is wrong????" "I feel like people appreciate the art of comedic one liners but you've got angst one liners. AND THEY SLAY."

pacing, timing. "This fic reads like a high speed express train. It just never stops or slows down!!" "What is this cRaFT! Like. Para 1, comedic. Para 2, thoughtful. Para 3, WHY DO MY HEARTSTRINGS HURT."

use of language. "Using he for POV character and they for the other is LINGUISTICALLY MIND BLOWING." (Please, I want this to catch on more. I do absolutely respect people's pronouns. These fictional characters (and people who have pronoun flexibility)? She and they instead of she and she?? THE CLARITY WE COULD HAVE??!? I'm incredibly greedy for it.)

premise. "Pierro Dad gives me so much life." "The Bachelor but it's Diluc?? Let's go!!"

plot twist, or cliff hanger. "The reveal!!! *screaming*" "I can't believe you would do me like this." (No, I can't in good conscience leave a specific example and give a fic away. Yes, I am thinking of specific fics still.)

Level of effort: be able to map details you like to writer's craft.

Let's not pretend we're here to do crit. Even if we're using writerly words, we are not here to do crit. Well, I am not because I don't believe the comments box is the right time or place for it, but I am happy to lay on the praise and point out the things that worked for me.

Usually, I think it's harder to look across a fic and be like, yeah, the dialogue hit, or this writing style or pacing really does it for me. It's more nebulous. And sometimes it kicks you out of fic reading headspace and into a writerly meta land to notice, so I don't, and I just let the fic wash over me. And if something here strikes me, I will offer my praises. Again, I think it helps to think of this more as an additional kind of One Detail I Like.

Tenets of commenting (and a little of reading)

Okay, so those were some do's, but I also have don't's. These are my boundaries that I keep. Maybe yours are different. I suspect most of these stem from the place, Author did this for free and Owes Me Nothing, so that's the one real tenet. I keep these in mind so that I can keep fic a nice, fun, safe place for me (and hopefully the authors too).

1. I will never ask for updates. I never expect a next chapter.

I've seen enough content creators stressed out and burnt out about putting something out over and over again. I feel for them. That sucks. They probably just started doing it for fun, and now ... The demand and expectation they continue to perform for free? Yeah, it's not going to come from me.

Once upon a time, because of this and a desire to have complete stories, I wouldn't read incomplete fics. I now am The Biggest Fan of incomplete fics. Yes, hang me off the side of a cliff. I will scream at you. And if you don't haul me back up? Well, fine. I'll live. Some other author's got my back. Probably. There's still so much to love between world building, characterization, good moments, jokes -- and you sometimes get the experience of seeing familiar faces screaming at the fic with you update after update. It's precious. It's fleeting. I could go on, but maybe a different day. Back to commenting!

Flip side, as an author, I will say the desire for more is, in one case, why I plan to continue a fic from years ago. I was very firm at the time I would not be extending the one shot, but I guess time changes things, and the fact people were like, I would read more story contributes to that.

So this one is very much a personal tenet. There's some line between I love this so much I want it to continue, and expecting there to be more. Where is it? I don't know. So I just stay away. Surely Author will get I want more if I just say how much I love everything and have commented on their latest chapter. Rather than leave snacks that taste like burn out to some authors, I will focus on other flavors of comments!

2. I will not say what I dislike.

Not my ship? I probably won't read. Not my preferred ship dynamic? Tropes I don't like? Characterization not hitting it for me? Paragraph formatting not doing it for me? I just x out of there, find something I do like. People be writing things for free! Let them have their fun!

If I did read it, snd I stayed, something else must have grabbed my attention. I'll focus on that. Writing style not quite doing it for me but I love the details added to the world? "Wow, the world you flesh out is so complex." No mention about how much of a drag it is to read, because hey, I still read it, and I had reason to not put it down!

3. I will not give corrections.

Authors (and maybe a beta) have put in tremendous effort and time, and to be like, "you missed a typo" or "actually, the canon lore says X" often detracts from the beauty of the shared fic experience. I interpret random grammar and misspeaks and typos in daily conversation and texts all the time. Surely I know enough to employ this skill. And if I figured it out, other readers probably will figure it out too. If I can't, I usually assume the author was too big brain for me and skip merrily along to the next sentence. (And if it's too much for me to handle, I click out.)

Yeah I get it! I get the urge to want to be helpful and contribute to other people's experience! I know that feel! Because, well, I learned this one from experience. I tried once. Watched an author wilt a little when what I wanted was to be helpful. Yeeeaaah, not doing that again.

So, I suspect this often comes off as a little entitled that just by that bit of you say something and kinda underlyingly expect the author to do something about it, and again, Author Owes Me Nothing! Even if the author is asking for a beta, I'd reach out first and make sure they are now in a headspace to be expecting beta thoughts from me.

Wrapping it up

I love fic, the world is rich with it, and I am full of love for authors and their craft. It fills my heart with joy to know I can return a little smile to someone who has let me hop on their ride for free.

It does take effort. Writing comments, turns out, is writing. Writing is a skill, therefore writing comments is a skill. And writing takes practice to improve, so, guess what, writing comments takes practice to improve. Who would've thunk. (Not me, I assure you.)

I've wanted to write this for me for a while, capture what I've learned because I noticed my ability to write comments change over time. Then recently, I was rec'd a fic and told to definitely leave a comment because the author deserves it and I write good comments. Dispatched because I write good comments! Now my commenter feathers are fluffed up, and so I have actually written this. But I definitely didn't start out the comment writer I am today, so I wanted to share that, surprisingly there is a progression path! (Maybe this is only surprising to me.)

I do find commenting adds to my fic reading experience. And I love reading other people's comments. Sometimes other people notice things I didn't or have very cool interpretations, and that is an extra wow right there. (And look at all these other people who like the thing I like!)

And if I leave a comment, sometimes I get a reply! Author noticed my little comment! Extra dose of happy for everyone!

And sometimes, sometimes, (and again I would never expect it, but it is a gift much like fic itself is) an author will write back full of their notes and what they were thinking about writing those moments, and I treasure that so, so much. It's both a delight because of the usual Author saw my effort commenting and I get an extra behind the scenes! The craft behind the craft! (Now how do authors leave good replies? That is still a mystery to me.)

Sometimes I write a lot and then it goes into a black hole, and that's sad. Hmm. I'm pretty sure this is what authors feel when we don't leave comments. Hmm. Guess it's time to write more comments! (Sometimes, like fic updates, replies show up months later, and that's honestly <3)

So, let's go leave some comments and show those authors love and tell them how much they delighted us! Or ... how they smashed our hearts into the ground with angst/no comfort because sometimes that's just what one wants to read.

[dotthings]

Started my spn S6 rewatch. Couple of thoughts on 6.01

While soulless Sam was a huge nope to me--I wanted actual Sam back and couldn't enjoy soulless Sam--the S6 gestalt overall interests me. The noir feel. The horror intruding into suburbia, which is very core to spn.

Dean's in a classic Hollywood archetype role, the one honest guy who finds himself caught up in a noir plot. No one he can trust, everyone hiding something.

Soulless Sam isn't a reliable narrator. But he is an observer and he has all of Sam's memories and he seems to believe Dean has a yearning for a family, a home, something other than just hunting, and he's not wrong. spn has played on that theme for Dean over and over. It swings back and forth. He yearns for it, he yearns for hunting. It's not simple.

Bobby's reasons for not telling Dean that Sam returned are pure and completely out of love, a dad protecting his son, wanting to give his son a chance at a life outside of the brutal world of hunting.

The show's series-long theme on addressing the brutality of hunting and the exploration on what else there is gets passed over a whole lot in fandom commentaries. I don't think the show idealized hunting. While there has to be hunting for there to be a plot, for there to be a show, this rumination about the toll hunting takes and what else is there is canon, those are ideas canon planted and explores, so it's weird that sometimes gets treated as going against canon somehow.

While Soulless Sam still gives me the heebie jeebies, rewatching him is interesting to see how Soulless Sam functions. He performs. Trying to be Sam, to act and feel how Sam would, and he can't. When Soulless Sam confesses he wouldn't even try, that's flatly untrue, we know Sam would. We've seen Sam race in to save people. But Soulless Sam is hollow, and the caring and the willingness to race in is embodied in Dean. And Soulless Sam may be empty yet he feels the pull toward Dean's warmth. He has Sam's memories after all, even if he doesn't directly feel it.

We know Dean doesn't fit in this new life and he's not going to stay, but Dean also is genuinely drawn to this life with Lisa and Ben and he isn't completely miserable. He also tries make it work, he doesn't ditch the Braedens the moment Sam returns, first he tries to find a balance. Moving back into hunting, while keeping a home base. And it doesn't work out, the point is he wanted that. Not an all or nothing.

While I don't think Dean and Lisa is some big epic love story, they do get along well and he cares for her and for Ben. Lisa's meant to represent a certain kind of life, she's a symbol and cipher, but for all that, he does also care for her for herself. I'm not ever going to be sorry Dean went to Lisa, after the horror he went through in S5 and the crushing grief. He had someone who cared for him, who was there when he had nightmares, who kept him from falling into the abyss, and he's doing better than he must have been those first few months. He's a carpenter. He's made a friend. And he likes being around Lisa and Ben.

I don't buy the "wasting away in the back of a pool hall" idea for several reasons, and there's one right there present in 6.01, because Dean loses Sam and he manages to function--he can't do it alone but that's kinda the point. He forms connections, he cares for people, he carries a sadness in him always but he doesn't just curl up and give up and waste away. He keeps going and finds comfort. Of course it turns out he tried to save Sam. But he didn't break the world and spiral either.

Dean's brain on djinn-poison hallucinations cooks up the YED referring to Cas as sugar to counteract all the spice of demons. In Dean's brain, Cas is one of the good guys, and he associates Cas with sweetness. (Which just makes the S6 story even more heartwrenching, but Cas's motives are good, Dean isn't wrong, exactly.)

[jaelijn]

Thoughts on The Thing in the OFMD finale under the cut because I need to articulate this somewhere and I haven't seen anything similar expressed, though at this point I'm not going into the tags anymore. Spoilers obviously.

And because Tumblr no longer lets you effectively keep things out of the tags/search even though I would rather no one but my followers saw this: If you hated the finale, move on. This post is not for you.

I feel like people are forgetting that this isn't primarily an escapist realistically historically pirate show, it's a queer narrative.

And Izzy's queer storyline isn't and has never been "discover sexuality, achieve key to self and life happily ever after" (that's Ed's and Stede's), it's "it's never too late". It's never too late to experience queer joy. Even if you're 95 and one foot in the grave, you can still discover the queer community. Even if you spent your whole life hiding it so far, you can still have it now. Even if you die of AIDS tomorrow you can still go to pride today. Even if some bastard might gun you down tomorrow for no fucking reason other than hating queer folks, you can still have this: queer joy and queer community. It is never too late for queer joy.

And the response to one of our own dying isn't to crawl into a hole and be afraid. It's to be even more aggressivley and life-affirmingly queer. It's new starts and weddings and parties. It's a fuck you to every time one of our own dies brutally. When we lose people of our own, the best thing we can do is to celebrate life. Queer life and queer joy and the queer community. This is what queer pride IS.

Does it suck when someone dies? Yes! Yes! It sucks majorly. But it's a part and a reality of queer lifes. Sometimes one of us dies way before their time. Most of the time it's unfair. Sometimes one of us only finds us when it's already late. Sometimes we can't have a full and happy queer life. It sucks. It's tragic. But it's a part of the story that needs to be told, because the worst thing we can do is pretend tragedy doesn't exist in queerness, to erase the tragedy from memory and thought and with it the people we owe most to remember because they are no longer with us. And while we need queer joy, we also need tragedy: If only to remind us to be even louder, even prouder, even queerer! And a show where there is queer characters who continue that queer joy is a place to tell this story - this is not a show where one queer death erases all queerness from the narrative, this is a show where EVERYTHING is queer.

And narratively: I knew Izzy was dead from the moment of the Pinocchio joke. The villain wasn't going to let him get away; it was happening. (Incidentally, it is foreshadowed exactly like Lucius's 'death' was: a life-threatening loss of limb early in the series.). But while Lucius's 'death' was sharp and brutal and unwarranted and unmourned AND caused by one of our own, Izzy's death doesn't come before Izzy can complete his arc, it comes at its culmination and it comes by a villain. It's not supposed to be something to be celebrated, of course not - it's death! It's tragic! But Izzy dies after having let go of his own toxicity, after having experienced the most happiness of his life and while being confident that the people he loves are safe. He can let them go on without him. The fact that it is heartwrenching is the point, but it's in no shape or form a death that is Bad Writing (tm).

And it's cathartic. That's what death is supposed to be. That the crew are able to move on isn't that they don't care - it's that Izzy left them with the legacy of celebrating their community ESPECIALLY WHEN they might die the next day.

I see a lot of people saying that the other characters don't seem to care. I don't understand what show those people have watched. I can only assume they have their heads so far up their arses in the generalised "MCD is Evil" that they can't accept that sometimes a character death is narrative catharsis and that that rage completely blinds them to subtle emotion (and also not subtle emotions: This is Ed "hide in his cabin to have a cry" Teach openly sobbing on the deck of the ship for the love of everything!). They obviously haven't watched anyone's face in the scenes of Izzy dying - nor during the funeral either:

Anyway - yes, the death hurts. It's supposed to hurt. But it makes narrative sense, it concludes Izzy's arc logically and powerfully and his legacy is, to me, a very very important queer story.

I, too, hope to never have a queer friend die, but if it happens, I hope that I'll have the strength to honour their death and their life by LIVING more proudly, more queerly in their memory, not by denying that they have died. Or by denying that I, too, might die at any time.

[aesterblaster]

Ik you said to send hot takes but what about your hot takes 👀👀

NYAHAHAHA THANKS FOR ASKING

*clears throat*

IsagiRin as a ship just doesn't work for me. Odk why just. Sorry I can NOT see your vision bestie. Half of the Blue Lock ships don't work for me especially when centered around Isagi because that boy switches side characters like they're pairs of shoes. In Blue Lock one or two sus or even sweet moments doesn't really amount to much to me because everyone has them here. That doesn't automatically mean date on a riverside resturant. On the other hand I totally could see Bachira x Isagi but I just think of them as really close friends because that's what gives me the most comfort being as some of the people who really saved my life were friends. I think it would be better if Bachira had a friend first and focused on himself before getting into any big relationship. Idk I guess that's more of a personal preferance

SPEAKING OF, I hate people who write Blue Lock smut w a burning passion. I'm not even gonna hit the whole iTS IMMorAL train it just usually sucks all the fun and personality out of the chosen character and is just trying to be as gross ans shocking as possible and twist them into somehow being pervs just bc they get all hyperactive when they play soccer. Like GET THERAPY. Half the time I go to the bllk tag im just scrolling like HE WOULD NOT FUCKING SAY THAT.

The anime gets a lot of slack but like... It's very difficult to transfer things from one medium to the other especially things as philisophical as Blue Lock

Fandom interpretations of Shidou are usually weirdly ooc because they wittle him down to like how cray cray he is or whatever and completely ignore for example, his respect for people who are also creative and out of the box or his ability to deal with lonliness and being othered by everyone

Characters that shouldn't be hated nearly as much as they are: NOA NOEL. You heard it here folks. I genuinely believe he's just trying his best and honestly most coaches would've asked to drop half the player he has to deal with by now like cmon you got an emo gymrat who was forced to become like you, you got a playee whos EYESIGHT IS FAILING but will literally start falling apart if you bench him, you got..kaiser and his lapdog ass cronie who dont listen to your plans at all, you got an entire rift between new and old players. Like how do you even fix that when you can't send people home (i think)? He gives good advice sometimes ngl and they're winning games so like...

Cont. Sure he isn't as funny or amusing to read as Lavinho or Chris and he isn't as open as Snuffy but DAMN IT he's doing his job ok? And all the dad son moments between him and Isagi are to die for.

Naruhayas little miniarc is honestly has the saddest backstory implications to me. THERE I SAID IT. Rin's is indeed tragic and heartwrenching but can be fixed, he can move on and heal if he so chooses. Bachira...ok nvm bachira's ties with it. Hiori's is an absolute tear jerker but he is still in Blue Lock. He still has some time to grow. Naruhaya? There's nothing that could be done to fix his position or bring him up or cut him from the weights dragging him down. We see so many characters in the Blue Lock universe rise from their poverty through soccer but DAMN IT NARUHAYA EXISTED TO SHOW THAT THAT IS A LUCKY AND FEW 2 PERCENT. HE PROBABLY HAD TO GIVE UP ON EVERY SINGLE ONE OF HIS DREAMS JUST TO SUPPORT THE VERY FAMILY HE LOVES SO MUCH. HIS PARENTS LITERALLY DIED. DO YOU UNDERSTAND? BACHIRA STILL HAS HIS MOM, RIN AT LEAST HAS HOPES OF RECONCILING WITH HIS BROTHER AND HIORI MIGHT ONE DAY SAFELY CUT HIS PARENTS OFF BUT HIS ARE IMPLIED TO BE GOOD PEOPLE JUST..STRAIGHT UP DEAD. AND THE WAY HE STOLE FOOD ALL THE TIME???? IM GOING INSANE.

Ok thats all for now LMAO

[elenirlachlagos]

SangCheng Fanfic Rec List

This list is definitely not exhaustive, I'm sure there's some I've forgotten because I neglected to put them in my bookmarks. I just dug around in there and tried to make it a little diverse and covering different authors.

I'm trying to word this post in a way that it doesn't get flagged, so please also mind the tags on the fics.

Sorted by word count, starting with the short ones.

the strangest, dampest embrace by Anbessette

Rating: teen and up

tags: crack treated seriously, shapeshifting, squid!NHS, friends to lovers, interspecies romance, Cloud Recesses study arc

POV: WWX

word count: 3.020

chapter count: 1

status: completed

AU or in universe: canon divergence

summary: Squid Yao Nie Huaisang is learning to shift into human form. Jiang Cheng is having the weirdest 'oh no my friend got hot' crisis in teenage history.

personal opinion on the fic: This sounds ridiculous, I know. And it kind of is. And it's also... kinda cute? This one fic is rather short, but it's the start of a series. Other fics of this series are rated explicit and with NHS being a squid, you can decuce what that means...

dark water by Morgan (duckwhatduck)

Rating: explicit

notable tags: drinking, loneliness, lots of feelings but no talking about them, hopeful ending

POV: JC

word count: 7.055

chapter count: 1

status: completed

AU or in universe: in universe

summary: Sect Leader Jiang invites the freshly appointed Sect Leader Nie into his chambers to have a drink, and it leads to more.

personal opinion on the fic: This is basically pwp, but filled with emotions. JC discovers, in a way, his sub nature, but he's also an emotional mess, and while NHS keeps it together more, he's also not 100% confident and in control - and this is actually one of the aspects I like about this, it feels much more authentic like this.

He's no bully, he's my friend by JaimeBlue

Rating: General audiences

notable tags: homelessness, dog!Jiang Cheng, unspecified city, , podfic available

POV: NHS

word count: 8.976

chapter count: 1

status: completed

AU or in universe: urban fantasy/modern cultivators AU

summary: Nie Huaisang has been living on the streets for almost two years since his brother's death, just trying to get by despite the 'things' he sees that scare him, though nobody else can see them - it's been that way since he was a boy. Then one day he chases some kids away from harassing an injured pit bull, and he finds in the dog a friend and partner in surviving life on the streets. But there is more to his dog than meets the eye, and maybe the companion he'd saved might just save him in return.

personal opinion on the fic: This fic is different. First of all, there's not much romance in it, just a hint of SangCheng at the end. Not surprising since Jiang Cheng spends most of this fic as a dog. So it's NHS-centric, too. It's very heartwrenching, but also sweet and hopeful (and I'm not even a dog-person).

the cold read by offlight

Rating: teen and up

notable tags: fake/pretend relationship, drunk making out, set in USA

POV: JC

word count: 12.022

chapter count: 1

status: completed

AU or in universe: college/university AU

summary: JC is annoyed by WWX constantly going on about his relationships, while he never had one. NHS comes up with the seemingly brilliant idea to start fake dating; for not entirely unselfish reasons.

personal opinion on the fic: It's a cute, fluffy fake relationship fic. Maybe things go a little too smooth overall, but sometimes you're just in the mood for that. However I do think the anger directed at JC towards the end is a little unfair; he genuinly didn't realize. There's a hot little drunk make-out scene in the middle, that doesn't go too far (so the teen rating is still correct, in my opinion).

the light of autumn by crooows

Rating: general

tags: canon compliant, hurt/comfort, talking, drinking, angst with a happy ending

POV: JC, NHS

word count: 13.845

chapter count: 5

status: completed

AU or in universe: in universe, post-canon

summary: Nie Huaisang arrives a week early for the conference which will be held in Yunmeng to discuss the position of chief cultivator.

personal opinion on the fic: This is a short one, so you can't expect a long built up and maybe the big "oh!" realization comes a little too fast. But the story shows both of them broken in ways that make them understand each other, and they're so sweet and cute together. Haha, that poor Jiang disciple.

Lights, Camera, Kiss by MissMagus

Rating: explicit

notable tags: 5+1 Things, dom/sub, brief Nie Huaisang/Wei Wuxian/Lan Wangji, bottom Nie Huaisang, service top Jiang Cheng, top drop, (plus a few other tags for the "movie" they're filming)

POV: NHS

word count: 15.377

chapter count: 1

status: completed

AU or in universe: adult entertainment industry AU

summary: When Nie Huaisang gets paired with straight Jiang Cheng for a five-part series, he’s sure it will be an utter disaster. Until the cameras start rolling and their chemistry alights like wildfire.

personal opinion on the fic: Alright, this is pretty much pwp; most of it is set during filming. Also this is of course most probably not in any way representative of the real industry. My favourite things about this is how the whip was incorporated (not done enough, imo) and the top drop JC experiences, something I've never read before.

Just Let Me Stay Here by Your Side, That Would Be Enough by xcourtney_chaoticx

Rating: teen and up

notable tags: friends to lovers, arranged marriage, canonical character death, post-traumatic stress disorder - PTSD, non-sexual intimacy, Jiujiu content, OCs

POV: NHS

word count: 15.822

chapter count: 1

status: completed

AU or in universe: canon divergence

summary: In the wake of the Sunshot Campaign and the sworn brotherhood of Nie Mingjue, Lan Xichen, and Jin Guangyao, it is decided that Nie Huaisang should be married into the Yunmeng Jiang. He is married to Jiang Cheng.

personal opinion on the fic: Sweet, fluffy slow-burn arranged marriage - sometimes you just need something like this. (Ok, maybe not always only fluffy, some of the dark things of canon still happen and there's the PTSD tag...)

Neutral Territory by Pyrria

Rating: mature

notable tags: movie violence, everyone lives/nobody dies, no Golden Core transfer, gangsters, bar/pub setting, drinking

POV: NHS

word count: 19.185

chapter count: 2

status: completed

AU or in universe: cyberpunk AU

summary: A series of conversations between Nie Huaisang, the overlooked, underestimated, playboy younger brother of the former leader of the Qinghe gang and Jiang Wanyin, a lowtek bar owner who knows more than he should and is connected to some very dangerous people. Is Jiang Wanyin someone Nie Huaisang can trust as he tries to unravel the attempt on his brother's life? Or is he one of the many moving pieces acting against Qinghe? If he's already fallen, does it even matter?

personal opinion on the fic: I really like the idea of the loss of a Golden Core being changed into not having cybernetic implants. I love the description of the AR technological world contrasted with the "old-fashioned" real worldness of JCs bar - it makes me wish I could actually see this (as film, animation, whatever). Plus it's always nice to have some uncle/nephew interaction and Nie Zonghui included. Yay for family. The mature rating is for the violence that the whole gang theme includes; I'm really bad with gore and violence and such but it hardly bothers me, so I'm sure most others will be fine.

a loving kind of boy by artsy_alice

Rating: teen and up

notable tags: tooth-rotting fluff, coming out, Jiang Cheng and puppies, 5+1 Things, childhood friends getting together, asexual Jiang Cheng, minor WangXian

POV: mixed, it's a bit chaotic (but it works out)

word count: 19.740

chapter count: 7

status: completed

AU or in universe: modern cultivators AU

summary: Or, 5 Times Nie Huaisang Comforts Jiang Cheng Through the Power of Cuddles, Heart-to-Hearts and Cute Animals, and the 1 Time it was the Other Way Around

personal opinion on the fic: I love the world-building in this. It's basically a collection of scenes from their lives, so there's not much development or plot or anything, and the SangCheng just kinda happens, so don't expect big romantiv events. Make sure to check out the author's social media accounts, though, because there's lots of cute art from this AU.

bright sunlight filtered by givemebaretrees

Rating: explicit

notable tags: arranged marriage, hopeful ending

POV: JC

word count: 20.175

chapter count: 1

status: completed

AU or in universe: canon/in universe

summary: Wei Wuxian and Nie Huaisang are arranged to marry each other by Jiang Fengmian and Madame Yu, which seems to make everyone happy—up until Wei Wuxian's life is changed by the Sunshot Campaign. Jiang Cheng is left to pick up the pieces of every broken promise his brother left behind, and some of his own, too.

personal opinion on the fic: I really like how the story weaves itself between the events we all know; it mentions them but doesn't do any unnecessary retelling. JC and NHS slowly dance around each other, getting closer, and then again further away. I kind of wished the NSFW part was a little expanded, then again it also fits like this.

Four Days in Lanling by halotolerant

Rating: explicit

notable tags: first time, mastermind!Nie Huaisang, grief/mourning, drunkenness, podfic available

POV: JC

word count: 21.020

chapter count: 6

status: completed

AU or in universe: in universe, partly post-canon

summary: During his first Cultivaton Conference as clan leader, NHS does some scheming that doesn't directly pay for his masterplan, and after the events at Guanyin temple, JC begs him to help his nephew again. And maybe also something else that happened between them can be rekindled, too.

personal opinion on the fic: The fic treads a fine line in making JC the oblivious and inexperienced and passive one; this could go very wrong - but it doesn't. He does have his expertise and he's growing into his role. They both have their obvious traumas and weaknesses, too. I do love how clever NHS is in this, it's a joy to watch how he manipulates and no ones notices.

Heart opening flow by gekidasa

Rating: teen and up

notable tags: yoga, college/university, background WangXian, awkward boners, jealous!JC, established NieLan

POV: JC

word count: 27.002

chapter count: 10

status: completed

AU or in universe: modern AU

summary: Jiang Cheng agrees to do a class at Cloud Recesses Yoga as a favor to Wei Wuxian. He was only planning to go once, but then Nie Huaisang walks into the class, and Jiang Cheng is immediately smitten. Unbeknownst to Jiang Cheng, the feeling is entirely mutual.

personal opinion on the fic: This is one of those fics where clearly the author pours in much knowledge about their interest. There's reference pics for yoga poses and all (it's pretty advanced yoga, though, so don't try this at home). NHS tries his hardest with flirting, but he is up against JCs insecurities. They dance around each other for a bit, but it's so sweet. It's seperated very conveniently into short chapters.

A Sweet and Vicious Cycle by Kendershire

Rating: explicit

notable tags: sugar baby/sugar daddy, emotional manipulation, pretend relationship, scheming Nie Huaisang, protective Jiang Cheng, panic attacks, terrible Jiang parents, demisexual!Jiang Cheng

POV: NHS

word count: 37.192

chapter count: 12

status: in progress

AU or in universe: modern AU

summary: After his life was upended and his brother incarcerated, NHS has to make a living with a generally disdained job - and uses it for his carefully planned revenge scheme. He intends to use his childhood friend for his means, too; but it doesn't quite go as planned.

personal opinion on the fic: The JC in this fic is what all those rude young CEOs in Asian dramas should be and never are. He's so noble that it'd be easy to condemn NHS for what he is doing, if it wasn't obvious that NHS is not unaffected. I so love the idea of the Crisis Blanket! Everyone should have one. This fic is not completed and has slow updates, but it's not abandoned.

perfect pretenders by skyestiel

Rating: teen and up

notable tags: WangXian, Gusu Trio shenanigans, practice kissing, making out, getting together, friends to lovers, mutual pining

POV: NHS, WWX, JC, LWJ alternating

word count: 60.549

chapter count: 15

status: completed

AU or in universe: in universe, canon-divergence

summary: During a drunken get-together, wei Wuxian has the glorious idea of a kissing competition between him, JC and NHS. Later, and still drunk, JC has the equally glorious idea that him and NHS could outdo WWx with the help of - each other.

personal opinion on the fic: Yay, Gusu times trio/quartet content! Happy innocent youth. I love all their interactions, I can very well picture them like this. It's so cute, but also sensual - I think chapter 5 has to be one of my favourite SangCheng content.

Shorelines in the Moonlight by Emrysian

Rating: teen and up (but there is an outsourced NSFW scene that has an explicit rating)

tags: hurt/comfort, suicidal ideation, Junior Quartet, qi deviation/unrest, loneliness, anxiety, slow burn, angst with a happy ending, family feels, JL/LSZ, healing, relapse

POV: alternating (JC, LWJ, JL, LSZ...)

word count: 62.854

chapter count: 27

status: completed

AU or in universe: in universe, post-canon

summary: A year after the events at Guanyin Temple, everyone seems to be moving on with their lives and learning how to live as they are. That is, until Sect Leader Nie's health is brought into question at a Discussion Conference, and soon everyone realizes that there are some things that have yet to be addressed. Grief takes many forms. What happens to those who are left behind?

personal opinion on the fic: Completely self-indulgent, but I love how everyone starts worrying about NHS. He even gets those infamous hugs from JC - since CQL this is something I'm jealous of. I love how the juniors crush on NHS, it's so cute and also hilarious. The time everyone spends together in Qinghe at the festival and in Lotus Pier, is so sweet to read with its family feels and budding love... Not everything goes smooth, though, there's a little more realistic approach to healing.

Come Go With Me by roseclaw

Rating: explicit

notable tags: set in USA, therapy, moving away from family, surfing, chronic pain, mentions of a being in a car accident and witnessing death (chapter 13), yunmeng sib feels, accidental kitten acquisition, small town vibes, lots of food preparing, house renovation, lots of ogling, making friends

POV: JC

word count: 102.289

chapter count: 15

status: completed

AU or in universe: modern AU

summary: Six years after he was in a car accident that killed his parents and left him with hardware in his knee and chronic pain, former competitive surfer Jiang Cheng quits city life, takes his parents’ inheritance, and buys a dilapidated inn on the ocean to fix up.

personal opinion on the fic: Everyone is mentioned in this fic, seriously, everyone, including Zonghui; there's kittens and even Wang Yizhou's thigh tattoo gets a mention, too. Personally I think that JC (often very relatable) and NHS (who stays mysterious throughout) feel a little OOC, though it may only be the vastly different setting. I do love the setting. I don't know a thing about the area in which this is set nor the surfing community, but it has a certain atmosphere I really like coming back to. (Somebody do a mood board?) The relationship between the siblings is really well done. When I first read this, my mother had a knee surgery, so a lot in this sounds familiar, especially how a lot of things that are normal to others are out of the question, and how overdoing it on good days can easily lead to bad days.

we both know better (maybe we don't) by captain_apostrophe

Rating: explicit

notable tags: fake/pretend relationship, demisexual!Jiang Cheng, slow burn, rich families, nobody is dead, background WangXian, occasional smut (often XueSang), Jiujiu content, robbery, sexuality exploration, angst and hurt/comfort, terrible Jiang parents, family dynamics, childhood trauma, non-sexual intimacy, divorce, skip codes for explicit content

POV: NHS, JC alternating

word count: 281.873

chapter count: 56

status: on hiatus

AU or in universe: modern AU

summary: NHS was hired to paint a mural on WWXs pizzeria wall but then WWX has another job for him: be the fake date for his very attractive brother to get people off his back about marriage and kids. The problem is that WWX didn't inform JC of his plan - and it goes how you might expect it to; or even worse. But since the worst damage seems to already been done, JC decides "why not" and the deal is on until WWXs wedding.

personal opinion on the fic: The "JC is a martial arts instructor" content you didn't know you needed. NHS is so thirsting over JC in this, and he's taking us all on that trip with him. The growing casual intimacy between them is so lovely to read (I'm a little jealous, really). I was a little worried about the addition of an OC to the family, but it works. The big "oh!" moment is so cheesy, so tropey - and so, so good. There are a couple of flaws. Sometimes it tries too desperately to be woke, like there's some secret plan to squeeze in a whole modern sex ed curriculum, to the point that it feels like in school books when the authors try to put some kind of story around a math problem (in this case the other way around) but it ends up being awkward. The demisexuality of JC is really well done; some other parts not that much, in my opinion. The more obvious problem is of course the current status. I'm not surprised, it had this vibe the last couple of chapters... But if you don't mind the uncertain future, do read. Or you could always stop after chapter 42.

[rosehippiefield]

Mental strength part 3: Kanna and Shin

The other posts on this topic:

Part 1: Sara and Nao

Part 2: Reko and Alice

Part 4: Keiji and Gin

Part 5: Kai and Q-Taro

Part 6: Joe and Mishima

This time I want to discuss our greeblings: a meek girl that misses her sister and an extremely scared guy that just wants to live, as they also display signs of unbelievable will and undying determination. Sometimes you need it to survive, and sometimes it helps you to stay yourself and be kind. Also warning, this post is quite long

Kanna seems so weak and fragile, grieving after her sister and being manipulated by Shin. But is she realy weak if she continues to hope, to bring out the best in people? She lost her close person, being 14 years old, then is kind of isolated from majority in chapter 2, believes she needs to be useful to the point of readily taking a deadly card from Sara and offering to be killed in second main game. Note, by the way, that her motivation there differs from the first main game: at first she just wanted to reunite with Kugie, basically to give up, now she makes a conscious sacrifice to save somebody else and help the group. The best thing is, if this little girl lives (which would cause her brother figure's death), she is finally determined to see it through, to defy Midori of all people even after learning horrible truth about her wish! Despite her struggles she tries to help, and her kindness is her strength - she is the first to see glimpses of real Shin Tsukimi, she is the one perceptive enough to know Sara is in danger and to actually take action, and in her last moment she still wants to assure everyone she loves them. Kanna goes through a massive character development, and she would never do that if she was truly weak.

Nearly whole fandom loves affectionately making fun of Shin's weaknesses, both physical and mental. The infamous 0.0% makes this completely understandable, as does the act of abandoning himself. Self-esteem of this guy has reached depth of the Mariana trench, his own shadow talks to him, his social skills are nearly non-existent. Heck, how is he still alive? On the other hand, his desire to still fight for survival despite all odds is intense. Shin could end it all in a black room, there was a sharp object, but he didn't. Sure, his shenaningans are... something, but to be able to replicate someone's behavior drastically different from his original personality is honestly impressive. I must add, it is difficult to know where "Sou" ends and "Shin" begins, but he considers himself to be weak and meek, hiding it quite well after "frying pan insident". In third chapter he loses his cool way more often, but what surprises me is his ability to quickly get back to his bravado. For example, after learning Midori manipulated him to sign consent form, Shin panics for a moment, and almost immediately reverts back to fake smile. I probably shouldn't remind anybody that Midori was akin of a brother to him, so to see this person on kidnappers' side is heartwrenching. Not to mention his health problem, I am sure something serious is going on. Of course our deathnote evader didn't go to gym to get better, but after being hit with a blunt object and presumably fainting in chapter 2 he still goes on despite his weak body. Finally, the mere fact Shin kind of wants to believe in group despite being hated by it, no matter the distrast sowed by Midori and 0%, shows me that hope is eternal, as does the fact he can still sacrifice himself for the sake of others. In second main game he on purpose tries to sway everybody to vote for Kanna, knowing she would pick Sara. Is this weakness, if his desire for survival is strengh? Not completely. He is fighting with his own ego to save someone else. And then he finally opens up, which is painful and scary. And afterwards he offers his life, admiting he was being awful (so he can also self-reflect). In short, this originally insecure fellow changes in the wrong direction, but he has strengh to not give up despite 0% and to still, despite cynicism, work with others when needed.

[7salty7]

Hey handsome<3

If I remember correctly from a post you made last year (if not just see this as a casual thank you without an occasion) today should be your birthday so I just wanted to send some well wishes and congrats your way. Your writing always brings a smile to my face and I’m so grateful you are here sharing these beautifully heartwrenching, silly, funny and lovely stories with us. Like I’m not even kidding. When I’m having a really rough day they always have the power to make me forget for at least a little bit, sometimes they even turn my mood completely. And when I was having a good day before I’m just walking around smiling like an idiot afterwards (or going to sleep like that). I love that for me. I hope you continue to enjoy writing them as much as we love reading them and that my comments maybe also bring a smile to your face. I wish you the comfort your characters give each other, and proper working communication, and a loving community, and all the fun in the world, and that you can achieve your dreams, and get a lot of rest, and that you always pull the photocards that you want, and that you find somebody that gets exited with you (when you show them your stuff), and that you still can live happily even tho the world seems to be against all of us sometimes (or all of the time but that seems a little negative for today). And all the other good stuff. I could yap on forever but this is already going to be a chonky boy so I’m gonna move on.

As a little thank you I wanted to draw you something. It was my first time drawing 3 people and using a 3D model to make the poses which was actually quite fun. Im gonna keep experimenting with that. It’s not my best work but I still kinda like it. Like I always do, I startet planning this since said post but haven’t started it till yesterday, oops. Since I didn’t have as much time as I had liked (because of beginning that late and me being exhausted from work) it endend up being black and white without real shading. Maybe someday I’m gonna at least shade it (and do the hands more than this sketchy style lol). Still this was actually the perfect opportunity cause I have a list of scenes I wanna draw from your stories some day (but you know how it is sometimes when it comes to actually making the plans reality, especially if it’s a lot of work). One of the more recent scenes being the Yungi x Woo sandwich is currently living in my head rent free so at least I didn’t have a problem deciding on which one to do for ones (I am indecisive). All of that to say

Happy birthday, I adore the heck out of you, I hope you have a lovely day<3 You rock!

Omg this is the sweetest ever. Thank you so much ♥️

[miniconsuffrage]

i still believe. by @sibella

ERROR. Story not found. ‘ANATOLY’ not in this system.

fic rec friday!!!!!!!!! it's still friday I have 15 minutes left!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I may not do this Every friday but I love making banners and I love recommending fics and I've been wanting to combine those 2 things together for a while now. and MAYBE I am biased. but that doesn't matter the fic kicks ass and I had a good image for it 😌

CHOBOTS......... chobots is an alternative retelling of chess inspired by kencen/choncert (the new york 2022 concert) in which anatoly and viigand are robots manufactured at the evil soviet chess player factory. there's a LOT of good viigand content.

is sooo so good. it is a literal rollercoaster. there are high highs and low lows. there are twists. it's hilarious. it's heartwarming. it's heartWRENCHING. things keep happening all the time. genuinely it is a stressful read but in such a good way. maya is a master of dangling enough information in front of you to encourage you to start putting puzzle pieces together, but maybe sometimes she's throwing in some pieces that look like they're from a different puzzle. and maybe they do fit somewhere, and maybe at the end you have completed one big puzzle and another little puzzle, which is a delightful surprise and WAY more fun than having just one puzzle. this is nothing sorry

genuinely though. it's so good. it gets absolutely wild but then the ending is so cathartic. and you care so so so so much about everyone involved (except molokov he can die). maya's writing style is such a delight to read. it's very whimsical generally which, combined with all the drama going on here (I say this so so lovingly, I love drama), is absolutely fascinating and soooo much fun to read.

and there's ROBOTS which is basically my favorite thing. so. you should go read it right now immediately!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🎉🎉🎉🎉

[creatordisc]

tbh toshirp is also autistic. to me. and i think that makes the fight so much more heartwrenching. we tend to pretend that all autistic people understand eachother. that we bond over shared expirience. and we certainly do most of the time. but the thing with autism is that it is such a large spectrum that two people can be autistic and have almost no overlapping traits. and sometimes those traits completely clash with eachother. i think you get the point now and how it relates to toshiro and laios.

[monstersinthecosmos]

I am sooo happy I sent that ask!! Your reply was everything I could have wished for and more. I didn’t know anything about the VC universe (I did see the movie adaptation as a kid, but all I could remember were the ~vibes), and now I might actually want to check out the books. I mean I can’t believe how much of it is canon LOL, traumatized kinky asexual vampires wtf? sign me up??? Which book(s) of the series would you recommend to me? :o

In the meantime, I will DEFINITELY be giving your VC fics a try, thank you so much for the pointers!!! I’m already weak just reading your reply, esp. that parallel of post-disaster Armand and Marius being kind of like an AU where Shiro *does* give up on Keith - that actually broke me. A lot of what I love about your fics is how you characterize Keith so realistically and in a way that’s meaningfully informed by his upbringing/subsequent abandonment issues and that’s a thrill to read because, well, it’s just good writing - but also because it makes so much sense, not just abstractly but in a very real and personal way. And while the ~relatability~ of it all makes for a super intense reading experience, it can also be weirdly and sometimes incredibly cathartic imo - which is one of the reasons why I think I keep revisiting your fics (sorry if tmi LOL 😭). But!! In the case of Sheith it more or less all works out in the end because, like you said, it’s such a wholesome ship and they love and prioritize each other so much that (as a reader) they’re kinda like a safe space, delectably complete with all the angst and hurt and fuckedupness of their circumstances/selves (you know, for flavor). However, thinking about a timeline where it does NOT all more or less work out, well that’s kinda super heartwrenching! But yummy? And I kinda can’t wait to get into it but I’m also genuinely scared for my heart LMAO. Anyway I’m sorry for rambling!!! With your permission I will definitely come back and scream about Sheith and vampires because I sorta already am lol.

Re: the teaser xmgdknfnrmsmgdk I can’t even gather enough brain cells to form coherent sentences, I’m just squealing and awaiting my resurrection I guess. Thank you sooo so so much! I got so excited I haven’t even been able to finish reading it 🫣😳😵😵😵

!!!!! Thank you again for such a thoughtful and delicious response! <3

Dgahskjdl g GOSH THANK YOU AGAIN

So this post got really long I’m so sorry asdghkads  TLDR: I recommend all of them but I also don’t LMAO and you can skip around and won’t be confused but it will spoil stuff. This is a LOADED QUESTION.

It’s wild like I was thinking about the fic i could stop dreaming and also just in general AGAIN IF WE CAN TALK ABOUT COMMON SHEITH TROPES/FANON like I’ve read many S8 fix-its where Keith is drifting around and he’s just like so cold and broken and empty!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And that’s how Armand feels to me! Even a fic like heart nailed open where Keith is just so fucking empty! Or SOURCE DECAY??????? Like I think there’s tons of Sheith AUs or S8 fics where Keith is like Depressed Guy Keith and !!!!!! God it fucks me up lol. Armand is kinda like if Depressed Guy Keith was also like a 500 year old fucking weirdo.

And like BECAUSE they’re vampires and they’re immortal they’re sort of always coming in and out of each other’s lives so like there’s always a hypothetical future where they can work it out. Like i could stop dreaming is about them working it out, right? And what it would take to heal that injury. And there’s a lot of stuff in canon where these characters commit absolute fucking atrocities to each other and still manage to work it out and I think it’s again just an exercise in empathy and asking if we can still deserve love when we’ve fucked up. The characters have CENTURIES to get over stuff (and some of them STILL DON’T LOL) but sometimes they do. Famously & without spoiling too much of IWTV, Armand does something pretty fucking atrocious to Louis and they still have a long relationship and still love each other very much!!!

But ON THE QUESTION OF WHICH BOOKS, jfc hold my beer

I think in Sheith you see people like almost universally dismiss S8; the only fics I ever see of it really are like just gratuitous whump or fix-its LOL which is valid. And VC has FIFTEEN FUCKING BOOKS and you could honestly ask ANY fan in VC which books “count” and which books are skippable and I think everyone has a different answer.

I also think you can read them out of order and there’s always a little bit of exposition to catch you up so you won’t be lost; the only downside is that you’ll get spoiled on the previous book. For example, if you jumped in and read Armand’s book first, it would make sense, but it would spoil what happened at the end of the book before it.

Also to get the movies & show out of the way because it’s faster than committing to fifteen books:

The 1994 movie is a pretty solid adaptation; you can tell they condensed some details for time or whatever but it’s pretty faithful. There’s also the show that came out last year which is …………….. not so faithful lol. The show also heavily focuses on Lestat & Louis which is the juggernaut ship of the fandom but they’re also like the missionary position of the fandom so who the fuck cares lol. (Loustat fans lurking in this extremely niche post I am so sorry, I'm kidding ilu LMAO it's just not my thing!) And tbh the show wrote Armand & Daniel’s characters SO POORLY it like absolutely killed any motivation I had to continue watching so as an Armand stan I can’t really recommend it but it’s kinda like silly and fun if you don’t take it too seriously. And tbh if this entire fact finding mission is to understand VC more, the show literally changes EVERYTHING; it changes the time period, it changes the lore, it changes the story, it changes the character ages, etc. Basically it just kept the names lol. It's a completely different canon so I think even show fics & book fics aren't compatible either.

There’s also a movie of Queen of the Damned from 2002 which is like SO BAD LMAO but also silly fun. It’s a really bad adaptation but I’d put it in between the movie and the show. Marius is in it and the characterization is really strange LMAO. Armand is an extra.

The thing about VC is that it’s very sort of like non-linear and nontraditional storytelling. Most of the books are narrated by Lestat but several of them are narrated by random other people, and a lot of times the same story is retold through other people’s POVs. Like you get the story about Marius & Armand in three different books and each version is a little different because everyone has a different perspective. And regarding reading out of order and having spoilers, I do think it often creates like a suspense vs surprise element because we circle back and revisit the same stories so many times; you might get a spoiler and read a book knowing that a certain thing is going to happen and there’s still the tension of waiting for it to happen haha. Like when I mentioned the cult raids Marius’s house—you learn about that in Book 2 so you read Armand’s book later going into detail about his life and you’re just SWEATING because you know it’s coming. AND THEN YOU READ ABOUT IT IN MARIUS'S BOOK AND YOU'RE JUST DEVASTATED ONCE MORE.

I will say that for me I always recommend just fucking read them lol. Just read all of them. LOL!! But they’re weird and like, you’re gonna hate some of them, but I don’t think you can take someone’s word for it on Tumblr, it must be experienced. But I do understand that it’s a lot of material to get through and so I can give a fair cheat guide I think.

Most fans agree that the first three books (“The Trilogy”!) are solid and worth reading. Those are Interview with the Vampire, The Vampire Lestat, and The Queen of the Damned. IWTV is like this gloomy gothic tome about Louis’s life that started this whole thing and was written as a conversation about grief because Anne Rice’s daughter had died. It absolutely reads like a book someone writes about their daughter dying and it’s REALLY beautiful but it’s also a bit dense at times. If you’re put off by the vibe IT GETS EASIER when Lestat shows up because he literally bursts into the series like Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way ready to like tell you how blonde he is and how he’s gonna fuck everyone’s lives up. The books are still very heavy on existential questions and angst and grief but the text gets a bit lighter and super absurd LOL.

The first three also establish the universe and lore, though, so I think it would give you a pretty solid foundation to understand that type of stuff.

After the trilogy the books just go off the rails like there’s a few about Lestat having stupid adventures and doing dumb shit, there’s a few that cross over with Anne Rice’s witch series (so add three more book so if you truly wanted to read all of them!), then Anne Rice went back to the church and stopped writing vampires so there’s a huge gap, and then she quit the church again and returned LMAO. There’s a final trilogy she wrote before she died that are like, not the heaviest reading and they’re just kinda like silly good times with lots of Easter eggs and fan service. I feel good about the final trilogy being how it ended, just really silly times about them trying to use iPhones and shit, completely wild.

As far as ARMAND CONTENT THOUGH.

Armand does feature heavily in the trilogy so that’s also a good Armand foundation. And it’s REALLY FUN because he shows up in IWTV as sort of a chill mentor to Louis, but then in TVL you get the story about how Lestat met him when he was still in the cult and he was a feral little monster!!! And I love the duality of how Lestat and Louis describe him!!! It’s framed as unreliable narration a lot of the time because like Lestat’s resentment & Louis’s respect for Armand absolutely color the way they describe him, but idk like 100 years go by in between the two meetings so you also see a lot of character growth and see how Armand is doing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! God. My heart.

Anne Rice also very often uses like texts inside texts so like, IWTV literally is an interview with a vampire where the bulk of the book is in quotes as dialogue LOL and then in other books you often meet a character who will talk for like 40 pages at a time to tell a story. So in TVL when Lestat meets Armand, Armand takes over for a chapter and tells the story of his life, and then later he meets Marius and Marius ALSO tells the story of his life.

QOTD is a modern story (modern in the 1980s when it was written haha) about how the whole vampire world has to deal with Lestat’s bullshit and they all come together for a common cause. This book features the little novelette about Armand & Daniel as one of the chapters!! It’s so good!! (The chapter is called The Devil's Minion and basically if you needed to understand Armand & Daniel you could just read that one chapter and that's basically it bc then it goes to shit!!! Not to spoil anything but also don't get your hopes up about like heaps and heaps of ship content because there isn't any lmfao fml)

It also features Marius and Armand reuniting with each other after 500 years!!!!!!!! HEARTBREAKING! It’s really good and very preposterous but the writing is so lush and takes itself so seriously you kinda forget that it’s preposterous.

Armand has a POV book later in the series, it’s called The Vampire Armand, it details his life as a human and some of his early years as a vampire with Marius. IT’S SORT OF LIKE A LONG EXTENDED VERSION OF HIS CHAPTER IN TVL.  

I do want to say that regarding the BDSM and whatnot that I mentioned; this book is quite controversial because there’s not good BDSM etiquette LOL and like part of the genius of this book is that it can be read as abuse, even when Armand isn’t setting out to tell you the story of how he was abused. I have a lot of thoughts about this because Anne Rice was also an erotica writer and her erotica books were all noncon BDSM; I WROTE ABOUT IT HERE I DON’T WANT TO GET INTO IT NOW but I think depending how people go into this book they either see the kink & sex stuff as explicit abuse OR you can read it as like, fantasy from a porn writer. As a Sheith fan I’m going to assume you’re not that sensitive lol. (But also por que no los dos, that's the flavor baby!)

Personally I think you could read this book as a standalone and like, it’ll be a little whacky without context, but I think I’ve given you a lot of context. It’s basically about his sad sad life, the religious trauma, and all the freaky sex he had. (Also just so you’re not disappointed, the sex isn’t graphic haha but he’ll be like “And then I went to the brothel and they licked honey off my nipples and I came home and Marius sucked my dick in the bathtub” but not like crazy sex scenes.)

Marius also has a POV book called Blood & Gold and it’s my favorite in the series!! IT’S MARIUS’S LONG EXTENDED VERSION OF HIS TVL CHAPTER. I think it’s the one that handles IMMORTALITY the best; the other books often focus on a short period of time or a specific incident and don’t often span someone’s ENTIRE life. IWTV spans Louis’s entire life but he’s only like 200 years old. Marius is 2,000!!!! He’s from the Roman Empire!! So like it’s really exciting to me to read about his whole life and all the eras he lived through!!!!!!!!!!!!

In his book you also get a few chapters about his time with Armand and it breaks my heart!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There’s also a third secret option which is the book Pandora which isn’t part of the main series; VC is like actually 13 books and 2 side books? LOL So Pandora is one of the side books. But she was the first vampire that Marius made and they were lovers for like 200 years. This book to me feels like Anne Rice had a lot of leftover historical research and wanted to park it somewhere so a lot of the text is her talking about history stuff but there’s really great Marius content here and Marius/Pandora is one of my fav ships.

A lot of the fandom are more into the original trilogy and the Lestat/Louis content but I’m all about Marius so I’m into the DARK TRIAD of The Vampire Armand/Blood & Gold/Pandora. This to me is the more interesting section of the series but it’s an unpopular opinion so don’t take my word for it.

Other than that I’d also say Memnoch the Devil is my absolute least favorite VC, I think it’s so weird and boring lol but there’s some absolutely incredible Armand stuff in it and the stuff Armand does in this will be spoiled immediately if you check out Pandora or TVA. All in all it’s like idk 10 fucking pages of Armand LOL so if you got an ebook you could probably word search him. BUT YKNOW WHAT? Again don’t take someone’s word for it from Tumblr because like I find this book very weird and boring because it’s the most religious and I was raised atheist; there are people who were raised religious and say this one is their favorite. So what the fuck do I know!

Marius & Armand & Daniel are all in the final trilogy as well if you make it that far. Daniel is sort of always shuffled to the side because Anne Rice didn't care about him so like every time Daniel shows up I like feast on the breadcrumbs LOL but I'm glad to get some context about how he's doing and what's going on with his life.

ANYWYA I’M NOT SURE IF THIS ANSWERS THE QUESTION OR MAKES IT MORE CONFUSING LOL but ! ?!

They’re very weird books, they’re also kinda outdated and racist, but very queer, beautiful prose, incredible characters. They were my first hyperfixation that I can never seem to shake even when I’ve done all the work to dismantle all the ways they’re problematic and imperfect, it’s just yknow sometimes something gets its claws in you LOL. And I go out and explore other fandoms and still always come back to Marius and Armand and Daniel lol. I say that to say I wouldn’t be offended if you didn’t like them LOL but don’t judge me if you give it a shot and you’re like “what the fuck is this”

I just think Armand is like the most incredible character of all time okay!

SORRY FOR THIS VERY LONG REPLY LOL love you, patience yields focus!

[chainsawmascara]

THINGS THAT I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW ABOUT MY FELLOW WRITERS

Thank you for the tag @lewdisescariot

I tag: @angelosearch @beaubambabey and anyone who wants to participate!

Last book I read: “Merrick" by Anne Rice (i have not finished, it is a slog, I'll finish it eventually), a book chronicling the works of Boticelli, "Go Ask Ogre," I'm in the process of reading "The Rebel" by Camus for the fifth time.

Greatest literary inspirations: John Keats, my former spoken word mentor and activist Jared Paul, William Blake, Anne Rice, Jose Saramago, Albert Camus, insert any 18th and 19th century gothic horror writer here.

Things in my current fandom I want to read but I don't want to write: mutually toxic bloodweave, disgustingly toxic bloodweave, mutually obsessive and manipulative toxic bloodweave, i need them to be their worst selves, i need them to fuck nasty, i need them to take advantage of each other (not sexually but also sexually with consent or begrudging consent to get what they want DO YOU SEE THE VISION)

Things in my current fandoms I want to write but I think nobody would be interested in them but me: Let's focus on bg3. Disgustingly violent, manipulative psychosexual vellioth/cazador. Utter monsters. Twisted power hungry fiends destroying each other where love is too kind, obsession is too shallow, hatred is too soft. Modern aus of them being awful, wretched creatures. Canon compliant awful, wretched creatures. Dead dove do not eat, would get me ostracized, self indulgent horrors.

Modern aus of Astarion being a mess and a menace in every way possible. Everything is wrong with him. He lives with Shadowheart, I need them to be perpetual roommates, she's the only thing keeping him from complete self destruction. His coping skills are atrocious, he cannot be fixed, no one knows how he isn't dead yet. Gale is sometimes moderately better if he's there, they cannot fix each other, there is no magic happy ending. Nobody dies, but they probably should. It doesn't necessarily start as a dumpster fire. It may creep up on you until it's too late and the sunk-cost fallacy has set in. Surprise, it's trauma! It's not pretty trauma! It's not "love can save you" trauma!

Also: long, lyrical canon compliant (mostly) pieces of everyone's suffering, of redemption and damnation, of character studies, of heartwrenching beauty in the tragic fates they cannot escape - they never wanted, leitmotifs in phrasing, a chorus of chosen words, the agony of everything, the love they seek, endless run on sentences, unyielding prose, allegories, their characters boiled down to fever dreams. Symbolic, headspinning, pitiful, reverent, songs that aren't songs, poems that aren't poems, stories that tell themselves yet say nothing without scrutiny, you will leave in awe and madness and hell and hope. Slant rhymes everywhere. It's accidental, it's intentional, it's everything everywhere nowhere at once, it's a spiral, it's linear until it isn't. GOD.

You can recognise my writing by: Please see the above third paragraph.

My most controversial take (current fandom): This answer from my dear friend carries over - "You aren’t better than anyone for hating their favorite character or how they love them. Just let people live."

90% of the Astarion headcanons I see convince me we have not played the same game. He does not become a better person, he is better to you. Ascending him does not remove my sense of irl morality. You're thinking of Wyll, everything you project onto him is a part of Wyll. Astarion is an awful person, he's a mess, he's full of bitter hatred, he needs to kill, he wants everyone to suffer, I love him. Cowards.

Cazador is SO FUCKABLE. He's a horrid, monstrous, contemptible, vile, wicked creature and while i cannot fix him, I can indulge in hedonistic blood filled psychosexual madness and honestly that's close enough for me. Larian, please let him rail me. Cazador romance WHEN. Self preservation? WRONG. Dancing with death for a hellsent vampire.

Top three favourite tropes: "i hate you, i need you." They are suffering, but they are suffering together. "You are so far past saving, yet i will not leave." Bonus: psychosexual obsession, have you figured this out yet, have i made it clear, are we on the same page. DO YOU SEE THE VISION.

What’s your current writing mood (10 – super motivated and churning out words like crazy, 0 – in a complete rut): it's 10, but chronic fatigue/where do i start with this and how does it end, it has to end eventually, I GUESS.

We're working on it.

Share a fandom frustration: As per my last email, refer to the astarion hot take.

[glitched-dawn]

You can't control the bullet.

This is gonna be a rant, and it might contain some intense or graphic stuff, but hang with me, I think there might be some meaning hidden in this.

So I've been writing a lot of attempted/suicide scenes lately. Sounds weird, I know, but that's what you pay for getting to write the romantical scenes, the epic battles, the fluff and everything else. You have to write the bad scenes too. And no, not the bad scenes, but the heartwrenching ones.

There are a lot of suicide attempts (and a few succeeded ones) in my novel series so far. We have one of the main character who's tried more times than they can remember, one who succeeded, and then even more who were killed by accident, or by friends, a disease, or plainly their own will - but a will they couldn't control.

Basically, I have experience with writing these scenes. I know which words to use, which feelings to convey, what thoughts are thought and what reactions and words others have.

But there's one thing I've just realized, that I'm just now having trouble with.

There's only one way you can shoot a bullet.

Sure, you can use other words, you can say "I pulled the trigger", or "my finger pressed down on the trigger", maybe "the gun went off" or "the bullet hit, and everthing went black". And sometimes you use other weapons too, and that's completely different, but there's no other way to convey that the bullet hit its target. You can't say what happened afterwards, since it was a suicide, the character is dead and can't narrate anymore. Of course, this might be different in third person's perspective, but hang with me now.

So; you shoot the gun. The bullet goes into your head, most likely. The bullet can't twist, or move, it goes in a straight line to your demise. You can't change anything once it's done, you can't redirect the bullet once it's been shot. You can't control the bullet.

If you point it at your temple, the risk that you move your hand and it grazes your scalp is minimal. If you point it in your mouth, the chance that it goes out the side of your throat is minimal too. Because there's no way to change the line of fire, no way to move a bullet once it's been shot.

The end is an end, and that end is one single ultimatum. You die of a bullet. There's no other way to convey that end. It's final, which is obvious since you die, but... well, it's always so different.

A suicide of spite and rage and depression is written different than one of desperation, or one of satisfaction and pleased finality. One character that's always stoic might break down and do it with shaking hands, one that's always soft and kind might be rageful or ruthless, just done. But the worst thing is when they're the exact same.

A small, weak, scared character feeling the exact same during their end as their entire life. Someone who's just gotten more power, rescued someone, fulfilled a goal, or was so close to reaching what they wanted, going out feeling the exact same.

Hopeless.

Some know that their suicide is going to happen, some don't, some sense it, but don't want to believe. And when it well comes, the emotions are so wild and lost, the shadow of emotions have nothing against the brutal physicality of the bullet itself. There's nothing they can do.

You can't control the bullet. But you can control if it fires.