#they can have Reasons and still just be a raging asshole btw like these two things can coexist

[lesbiradshaw]

people love looking at asshole characters and making up reasons to explain away why they’re a dick to everyone they meet when half the fun with them is the fact that they’re mean and a little bit demented! i love them for that! stop taking it away! you’re not making them nuanced you’re making them BORING!

[d0llpie]

hi its ya gorl seijoh hoe 🤠 how would they all (separately or as a group) react to the reader when she gets protective n savage toward a crappy guy who treated her friend like trash n she talks to the guys abt it?/ love the blog btw <3

Reacting to you slapping a guy

Characters: Oikawa x reader, Iwaizumi x reader, Matsukawa x reader & Hanamaki x reader

Warnings: mentions of cheating, nudes, swearing

a/n: Hiii i made y/n slap the guy cause he was an ass✋🏻 hope you enjoy love :) ,,,also some are in high school and some aren’t so sorry if that’s confusing <33

wc: 2.8k

Oikawa

- Your friend had recently broken up with your boyfriend and Oikawa wanted to come tell you about the rumours he’d been spreading

“No f/n, you were right to dump him he can’t expect you to stay with him when he’s never making dates and only hanging out with you when he’s drunk. That’s not a relationship” you were getting fired up just thinking about how much of a dick your friends ex was. “I know y/n, i just...i feel like i’m gonna regret it i mean i still love him, i know i shouldn’t but..” she sighed and shrugged and you held her hands comfortingly, you knew this was hard but having to build her up after every fight they had was breaking your heart and you were glad she finally managed to cut ties with him. “I know, you’ll be okay, i’ll be here the whole time m’kay? so will tooru and i’m sure he knows someone if you want to go out and have fun to get over him..” you playfully nudged her and she giggled, you were happy to finally see her seem happy. “I dont need rebound sex y/n” she rolled her eyes and you laughed together before your boyfriend, Oikawa approached you both seeming uncharacteristically nervous.

You both looked up at him expectantly “hi tooru, something wrong baby?” he sat down next to you and smiled sweetly at f/n “uh, you broke up with ex/n recently right?” your eyes widened and you slapped Toorus arm “it’s okay y/n, i figured you’d tell him anyway, i don’t mind..and yeah i did, why?” you glared at Oikawa and he laughed awkwardly “well, he’s behind the gym, i was taking a break from practise and heard your name so i listened and he was saying..things...” you looked over at your friend who was growing more anxious by the minute. You knew she’d have a million thoughts running through her head, regretting the break up. You frowned before turning to Oikawa “what things Tooru?” you were growing more frustrated by the second, thinking about that asshole. “His friend asked him about the break up and he said he broke it off cause you wanted more than sex..” Oikawa offered an apologetic smile before rubbing her shoulder “he WHAT?”.

While Oikawa was trying to comfort your friend you were seeing white, blind with rage as you stormed off ignoring your boyfriend calling you. “We should follow her, something bad is going to happen..” Tooru dragged your friend behind you as you continued on your path to the gym. That asshole couldn’t handle being dumped so he lied? what a fucking joke. You were muttering under your breath, effectively clearing the people in front of you away as the avoided your furious aura.

“Oi ex/n!” he turned around with a smug grin on his face and his friends whistled and laughed, clealry entertained “Y/n, what do i owe the p-“ he was cut off by the loud bang of your fist connecting with the bridge of his nose. He stumbled back, holding his nose as a few drops of blood hit the floor, you shook your hand, adrenaline coursing through you “you bitch!” he took a few steps towards you but you were pulled back into a firm chest “Uh, we’ll be leaving now. Don’t bother telling anyone or i’ll let the whole school know about what really happened, including your tiny dick.” Oikawa smiled widely at them before dragging you away.

When you were sitting back with your friend and Oikawa she hugged you tightly “y/n, i fucking love you” you both laughed while Oikawa stood there staring at you “ahem?” he cleared his throat. “Hi baby...?” he sighed before grabbing your hand and pressing a soft kiss against each knuckle “your adrenaline is going to go away and this is going to hurt, i’m getting you ice..f/n, make sure she stays put.” He began to stand up but you grabbed his wrist, wincing slightly “i’m sorry for making you worry Tooru” you leant down pressing a kiss to your forehead “don’t be sorry, i love how much you care about your friends, i just don’t want you hurt, i’m sure he’s worse off though, you threw a good punch i can’t wait to tell Iwa!” you both laughed before he pressed another quick kiss to your forehead, jogging off towards the gym again to grab an ice pack.

“Ugh you guys are so in love it’s gross” you friend pretended to throw up and you laughed at her “yeah” you smiled cheesily and she smiled too, she was happy you had someone so perfect for you.

Iwaizumi

You were having a night out with your best friend since she was feeling down. Her boyfriend had been distant lately so you offered to take her to a club Iwaizumi and you had gone to once to blow off some steam.

You both dressed up took some pictures before heading out. You were happy to distract your friend, she was already feeling better and excited to go out with you. You texted Iwaizumi letting him know you’ll probably crash at f/n’s house and sending him some pictures. He told you he’d stay up and wait for you to text him you got in safe anyway.

When you arrived you bought some drinks for you both and she sculled it down before moving to the dance floor, you watched amused from the bar. You felt someone staring holes into your side and so you turned to meet a very guilty face, with his arm wrapped around some girl. She was looking up at him confused “baby what’s wrong?” you scoffed audibly before making your way over to them. If your friend noticed your absence you didn’t see.

“You know, i wish i could say i was surprised...” he rolled his eyes, guilty expression vanishing as he tightened his arm around the girls waist. “So you’re the girlfriend?” you turned to look down at the girl as she scowled at you and you almost laughed. “Oh so she knows, and no sweetie i’m not.” “I am.” you turned around shocked to see your friend on the verge of tears behind you, looking heartbroken. You felt your stomach drop, you turned around to look at her now ex, wanting the Earth to open up and swallow him whole for being the reason your friend felt like this.

You don’t know what happened but suddenly your palm was red and stinging, raised into the air and he was holding his jaw, fury in his eyes. F/n grabbed your arm, quickly running out towards to the exit. “Y/n, you’re such a badass what the fuck was that?” she laughed loudly, it sounded nice despite her ruined make up and red eyes. “Are you okay?” you asked, taking out your phone to text Iwaizumi, her laugh died down and she nodded, tearing up again before hugging you. You rubbed her back soothingly.

Y/n: Hi baby, soo night out has been cut short, can you come pick us up? f/n is staying the night also hurry there’s an angry blonde girl trying to find us

Iwa: explain when i pick you up. i love you.

Y/n: mhm i love you too <3

A few minutes passed and f/n had stopped crying and was sniffling, sitting in the floor deleting photos of her ex. You heard obnoxious clicking of heels and looked to see her ex and his new girlfriend walking towards you both. You cursed under your breath, alerting f/n to the two new presences. You saw Iwaizumi’a car approaching and when he saw your panicked face he sped up, parking right in front of f/n. He guided f/n to the back seat, letting her lie down, guessing by the sight of her ex boyfriend holding another girls hand what had happened. He could see the way they looked like they were trying to kill you with their glares and came to stand beside you, “can we help you?” he wrapped a protective arm around your middle, smiling sarcastically. “Yeah, control your bitch she fucking slapped me.” he chuckled dryly and Iwaizumis grip tightened, “y/n get in the car.” you gripped his arm “zumi don’t, he isn’t worth it he’s pathetic” he looked down to see your pleading gaze and he sighed, kissing your forehead before turning and walking you both back to the car. “Hey-“ “Shut up man, you lost a good one.” Your friends ex walked off angrily and you both got in the car.

After a few minutes of driving, Iwaizumi rested his hand on your thigh, you could tell he was tense so you rubbed his hand “relax baby, i’m okay..” he relaxed his shoulders and loosened his other hand on the steering wheel. “I know but he’s an ass and i don’t trust him” he was stroking your thigh trying to calm himself down. You looked behind to see f/n “hi, you feeling okay ?” she nodded, smiling at you. “Iwaizumi i just thought you should know she did hit him pretty hard” you both giggled and iwaizumi squeezed your leg, letting out a loud laugh as he brought your hand up to his lips to kiss your knuckles.

You spent the rest of the night cuddled up on the couch with your best friend while Iwaizumi made you both food and put on some movies. Iwaizumi watched you both from the kitchen, admiring you taking care of your friend with a love sick grin on his face.

Matsukawa

You were at your best friends apartment waiting for your food to arrive, you were having dinner with her and sleeping over since she just broke up with her boyfriend. They’d been together for ages, he even introduced you to your boyfriend Issei, eventually he got toxic and started preventing your friend from hanging out with you guys.

The door bell rang and you sprung up to go answer it, “i got it, stay here but pause the movie.” you opened the door revealing your boyfriend looking down at you. “Hi baby” you chuckled, surprised as he pulled you into a hug, kissing the top of your head before moving to the lounge room where f/n was.

“Hi f/n, i’m sorry for coming over unannounced but have you spoken to ex/n recently?” she sent you a worried glance and you sat down next to her “Uh you guys aren’t together anymore are you?” you shook your head no and he paused. “Look, i’m really sorry f/n, i was on snapchat and he posted a...photo of you on his private..” she pulled out her phone hastily swiping through, she was stressed as a million thoughts clouded her mind “he removed me...” you looked over to issei who took out his phone.

You held his phone and opened the story, it was f/n naked on a bed with a caption “new whore on the market”, the next was a video of him and some friends at a park, one you recognised. F/n snatched the phone from your hand and started shaking, you gripped the pillow beside you, growing enraged at how far he went and how stressed your friend was. You stood up and walked out of the apartment, Issei followed behind you questioning you. You ignored him and got into his car, driving to the park. Issei stood in the driveway dumbfounded “f/n, y/n’s gone crazy again where’s your car?” f/n was crying now, she came out and pointed to her car parked across the street and Issei guided her to it, rubbing her back to try and calm her down.

You pulled up in front of the park and stepped out of the car, one of his friends snickered “damn she didn’t bring f/n with her, i mean they’re not bad either” they started to laugh and you ignored the growing pit in your stomach, approaching ex/n. The smug look on his face only antagonised your further as he leaned back against the fence. You wanted to wipe that look off his face so you brought your balled fist up and connected it with his jaw. He fell back further into the fence and as held your fist in your hand. His friends started to approach you, you didn’t hear a car door slamming over your own shriek when a firm arm gripped your upper arm. You winced as the grip tightening before an arm encased your middle “issei?” the man loosened his grip on your arm as Issei towered over him. “Let go.” his face looked calm, mocking almost but his voice was dripping with venom and the man let go. “Great.” Issei lifted you up and hauled you over his shoulder putting you in the car.

“Issei i’m sorry i know i shouldn’t have hit him but he was such an ass and f/n didn’t deserve that..” he furrowed his brows as he drove “i’m not mad” you looked at him “really?” he threw his head back and let out a laugh “babe are you serious? you were so badass, if you didn’t hit him i would’ve anyway” you smiled up at him and giggled “are you okay though?” you nodded and he glanced over at you.

After going back to f/n’s house, Issei iced your hand and pressed a few kisses to your upper arm where a small bruise was forming. “I love you, so much baby, i’ll see you later okay? Take care f/n, i’m really sorry, it’s been taken down” she nodded and offered him a smile and you hugged him in return “i love you too, i’ll text you okay?” he smirked at you before kissing you quickly.

F/n and you binged some shitty rom coms and did some face masks while trying to relax after a stressful day.

Hanamaki (sorry his is kind of short)

You were walking around with Makki after your date night, going to get ice cream. “Makki its this way, we’ve been here before!” you attempted to drag your boyfriend by the arm “babe it’s this way, i think i would know” he rolled his eyes “Makki i stg, you’ll see you’re wrong” you stuck out your tongue and he kissed it quickly, you scrunched up your face and wiped it “you’re gross” you both laughed until you heard someone yelling.

You turned to see your best friend looking down at the ground while her boyfriend yelled at her, throwing his arms up and growing more and more frustrated. “Y/n, isn’t that f/n, what the fuck?” Makki started approaching the couple and you quickly followed behind. “Makki wait, he’s really angry what’re you going to do?” you held onto his sleeve as he sped up.

F/n, Matsukawa, you and Makki had been friends for years, attending middle school together and high school. When you and Makki got together you remained friends but f/n quickly grew away from you when she got a boyfriend, barely returning texts, avoiding you at school. You didn’t understand why but you had a feeling it wasn’t malicious, you never liked her boyfriend anyway, so you weren’t mad at her. In fact, despite the circumstances, you were happy to see her, you’d missed her. Makki also missed her, the dynamic the four of you had, he hated her boyfriend.

“Makki? Y/n?” f/n looked up to see you both approaching her angrily. “Oi, can you not pay attention to me for once jesus this is why you were single for so long” your friend cast her gaze back down and you felt a rage bubble up inside you. You’d spent many nights with Makki wondering why f/n hadn’t been speaking with you much, assuming the worst about her boyfriend while Makki joked about him, assuring you he’d never act that way and here he was confirming your theories. You could see Makki tense up before he grabbed his collar “What the fuck do you think you’re doing talking to her like that” he turned to look at Makki and when he did you swung your hand, slapping him. His head whipped back as Makki loosened his grip, turning to you with a massive grin “damn, nice one babe” before he shoved him to the ground grabbing f/n and running away.

You both laughed loudly, dragging f/n away, after a few minutes of running you stopped. “Babe, i told you the ice cream shop was the other way” you whined before you heard sniffling beside you, “f/n...are you okay, i’m sorry i didn’t help you sooner, i wasn’t sure and i’m sorry he was treating you so badly and i didn’t know..” you looked down, grabbing her hands, she smiled at you tearily before pulling you into a hug. Makki joined in, hugging you both as she whispered into your chest “i’ve missed you guys, so, so much.” you laughed with her “i miss you too, stay the night will you? We have ice cream at home” Makki groaned as you sent him a glare “c’mon you two, i’ll call Mattsun, it’s about time we all caught up.” you both nodded and began walking home together.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 287: Family Reunion

Previously on BnHA: The Tomura For One VS Deku And Pals clusterfuck reached new levels of clustfuckery as AFO possessed Tomura’s body and stabbed Kacchan and Endeavor. Shouto was all “good thing I leveled up offscreen so as to be able to fly around whilst carrying 400lbs worth of people”, and did just that and it was like, damn, son. Meanwhile Deku’s rage went Mach 100, and he kicked Tomura’s ass for almost two whole seconds, but in the process he apparently forgot that IF TOMURA TOUCHES HIM THAT IS VERY BAD, and so he stupidly let Tomura touch him and Tomura was all “GAME, SET.” Fortunately for Deku, his quirk plays by its own rules, and so the chapter ended with us cutting to the METAPHYSICAL OFA/AFO PARANORMAL DREAMSCAPE OF MYSTICAL BULLSHIT, where AFO!Vestige was all “lol Tomura y u mad”, and Nana!Vestige was all “SUP DEKU, YOU’RE JUST IN TIME, LOOKS LIKE IT’S ASSKICKING O’CLOCK.” I’m paraphrasing a bit, but that’s more or less the gist of it.

Today on BnHA: AFO is all “well if it isn’t Tomura’s grandmother who I murdered that one time”, and Deku is all “?”, and AFO is all “fucking vestiges, man, wild”, and Deku is all “??”, and AFO is all “ANYWAYS GETTIM TOMURA”, and OFA is all “NOT SO FAST”, and Deku is all “???”, and really, same. AFO then goes off on some wild tangent about how Deku is unworthy because he couldn’t protect everyone and needed help from OFA and got mad about his friends being stabbed, which is such a cold take it gave me hypothermia, but it ends up not mattering since Deku and Tomura both wake up seconds later with OFA still in the possession of its rightful owner, HOW ABOUT THAT. The chapter ends with the LoV approaching on Gigantomachia’s back with Dabi practically salivating at the mouth, and Toga trying to reignite an old fandom blood feud. Toga why would you do this to me. Toga.

YESSSSSSSSSSSSS

[CROWD LOSING THEIR MINDS] FINALLY THE NANA HAS COME BACK TO BNHA!! IF YA SMELLLLL WHAT THE NANA IS COOKIN!!!!! [RINGSIDE BELL CHIMING WILDLY] [LOUD AIRHORN NOISES]

“chapter 287: mistake” omg. yeah I’ll say you made a mistake, AFO. I HOPE YOU ENJOY THESE FLEETING LAST MOMENTS OF YOUR SHITTY EVIL LIFE

(ETA: so in all seriousness this must be referring to AFO’s belief that All Might/OFA made a mistake in choosing Deku, right? “I can’t believe you went and chose this shounen manga protagonist as your champion, what were you thinking.” I’ll just put this out there: however many comic books AFO read as a child, it clearly was not enough.)

wow Deku how slow are you

yes you’re inside OFA you dimbulb, did you think your clothes suddenly vanished out of the blue and the ghost of Nana just randomly appeared in the real world by some freak coincidence?? can you believe this kid. breaks his arms a measly 10-15 times in a row and all of a sudden he can’t think straight, get it together Deku

but also brb having a moment at the fact that his thoughts immediately run back to Kacchan, even with all of this nonsense going on and Nana about to lay the beatdown on AFO’s potato-lookin’ ass. forget that noise, all he wants to know is whether or not Kacchan is all right. fuckin’ geez. AM I OVERREACTING HERE A BIT. probably

(ETA: ALSO!! the way he just trails off!! “Kacchan is...” and then he can’t bring himself to complete the thought. oh my god my heart.)

HOLY SHIT

okay,

damn but this man sure knows how to ruffle my feathers. as eminently detestable as ever!!

could it be any clearer here that AFO is not on Tomura’s side?? for a moment I thought he had actually grabbed him by the back of the head in order to get him to look. but nope, he’s just resting his pointing hand on top of his head instead while he’s all “HEY TOMURA LOL IT’S THE GHOST OF YOUR DEAD PATHETIC GRANDMA”

for those keeping track at home, this would be the first time that Deku has heard this information -- that Tomura is Nana’s grandson -- and possibly the first time Vestige!Nana has heard it as well. Nana died when Kotarou was still a child, so for all we know the Vestige!Nana didn’t even know she had a grandson, lol. TODAY ON “MAKESTE RANTS AT LENGTH ABOUT THINGS THAT WILL PROBABLY BE ADDRESSED WITHIN THE NEXT THREE PANELS”, anyway moving on

lmao for the record I fucking LOLed at this giant question mark immediately bubbling up over Deku’s head

no idea what AFO is about to ramble on about now, haven’t read that far yet. but let the record show that Deku’s immediate reaction to hearing “BTW NANA IS YOUR ARCHNEMESIS’S GRANDMA LULZ” is everything I could have hoped for

(ETA: fandom nailed the shit out of this one with the confused Mr. Krabs meme lmao.)

okay so now AFO is monologuing at length about how he would sometimes have “riveting dreams” about the previous owners of all the quirks he stole. but once he gave the quirks away they stopped bothering him?? holy moly let me just take all the notes

okay so he’s saying that Vestiges are created whenever someone has their quirk stolen by AFO. but if they then disappear when he gives the quirks away, does that also mean that whoever receives the quirks also gets the original owner’s Vestige bundled in every time?? that would be wild okay hold up let me read the rest of this

so he’s saying that the Vestiges are actually the “consciousnesses” of the original quirk owners, which have become embedded in their dna or something. SOUNDS INCREDIBLY DUBIOUS TO ME LOL but on the other hand this is a world where children can be born with airplane heads, so my disbelief can hardly afford to pick and choose what it’s gonna be suspended at! anyways though, how does he know he’s the only one who was able to converse with them? did you conduct detailed six-month follow-up interviews with everyone you gave quirks to or what

and if it really is the case that this ability was formerly exclusive to him, isn’t that more evidence than ever that OFA and AFO are actually THE EXACT SAME QUIRK oh whoops am I getting ahead of myself again, sorry

MEANWHILE TOMURA IS ALL, “GRANDMA?”

“WHY AM I HERE, WELL LET ME TELL YOU A STORY, GRANDSON. YOU SEE THAT MAN GROWING OUT OF YOUR RIBCAGE THERE? WELL IT’S JUST THE FUNNIEST THING, ACTUALLY”

WAIT SO IS HE SAYING THEY’RE SOULS OR NOT??

this makes it sound like they won’t ever get to rest, which sure sounds like a soul thing to me. well whatever, soul, consciousness, I guess it’s just semantics at the end of the day

anyways though, so this asshole is finally done talking (I’m sure that won’t last), so now we can finally have the heartwarming reunion we’ve all been waiting for

sigh

-- actually, no, not “sigh”!! you know what!! because Tomura says “whatever the reason”, but that’s only because he doesn’t actually have a fucking clue about the reason. like, I don’t know if the knowledge that AFO killed Nana would be enough to give him pause, but if he knew the whole story and knew that AFO was behind not only Nana’s death, but the rest of his family’s deaths as well... now that would be a whole different thing

anyway. but at least it’s becoming clearer now why AFO spent all that time raising Tomura up as his heir and brainwashing him even though he seems to have been planning this body takeover the whole time. it’s all because he loves making people miserable! yaaaaay

btw HAS NANA HAD THE EXACT SAME MOLE ON HER CHIN AS TOMURA THIS ENTIRE TIME WTF. am I just the least observant person who ever lived lmao

lol wtf

ground: [randomly starts exploding]

Deku: “ONE FOR ALL IS BEING ERODED!!!” LOL IS THAT WHAT’S HAPPENING HERE, OKAY THEN. I’ll take your word for it

y’all I cannot fucking get over this “AFO growing out of Tomura’s hip socket like a fucked-up ventriloquist dummy” shit though

you do realize that absolutely no one can take you seriously right now, right?? it’s important to me that you know this

WHAT’S THIS NOW

seems like SOMEONE has had it up to here with a certain SOMEONE ELSE’S bullshit lmaooo bye Felicia

I SAID GOOD DAY!!

you guys why is he not dying!!

-- OH DAMN

love how Deku is just lying there like “YOU KNOW THOSE DAYS WHERE YOU’RE LIKE, THIS MIGHT AS WELL HAPPEN.” poor Deku

(ETA: where in god’s name is OFA Prime standing. why are my thoughts fully consumed by this lmao.)

are Nana and OFA Prime even doing anything?? why are they sticking their arms out like that. wait hold up is this all a big metaphor for the back-and-forth going on between Tomura trying to steal OFA and OFA being all “actually no you can’t, please enter your password and click on all the boxes with bicycles in them to prove you’re a human first”?

OH SNAP OFA PRIME SAID NO THANKS

“SORRY BRO WE’VE ALREADY MADE OURSELVES AT HOME HERE”

I have only just noticed that metaphysical!Deku has the same scars as actual!Deku. and yet his arms are not currently broken! that doesn’t really seem consistent to me but whatever!! maybe he saved right before the boss battle, that would be smart of him

anyway, that’s great and all that OFA Prime is here helping out, but I really wanted to see Nana fight AFO in a one on one though so I’m a bit disappointed. also why is it only the two of them?? where are Banjou and the others. of all the times to be sleeping on the job

FOR FUCK’S SAKE, THIS MAN

WOULD YOU STOP. WOULD YOU JUST QUIT IT ALREADY

oh shit hold up

doesn’t this confirm that the reason he wanted to transfer his power to Tomura is because he believed it would make him strong enough to finally take OFA because of Quirk Singularity? jesus christ. and here he was so sure of himself. but it turns out he doesn’t actually know shit! you can’t just fucking take OFA like that ya dingdong that’s not how it works

(ETA: SO, A THOUGHT -- is there any sort of subtle hinting here in the way that he words this? “if your strength is combined with mine”, as opposed to “if my strength is combined with yours”? no idea if the admittedly-so-small-as-to-be-almost-inconsequential distinction between those two sentences exists in the original Japanese or not, but I find it very interesting that the English wording implies that he’s the one adding Tomura’s strength to his own, rather than vice versa.)

now he’s insulting Deku!!

excuse me sir WHO ASKED YOU anyway. and never mind that being consumed by an, AND I QUOTE, “unquenchable” rage is your protege’s whole THING, and that he also needed your help to avoid being burned to a crisp a short while ago. where do you get off I swear

(ETA: also just want to point out that in the panel before this one he says that he’s been “watching through Tomura”, which pretty much confirms that his consciousness or whatever is alive inside of him all the time. Tomura is definitely not getting rid of this guy any time soon.)

WOW

first he calls Kacchan useless, then he calls Deku a simpleton, and don’t even get me started with Nana. just, you guys. this man is just... a very, very rude man

NOW OFA IS ALL “THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT MAKES HIM SUCH A GOOD PROTAGNIST YOU BUTTMUNCH” AND OMG PREACH

“DESPITE HIS COMMON SENSE” sdfkllk my man he already has one brother roasting him, take it easy guy

AHH WHAT

IS THIS BACK IN THE REAL WORLD

YEP

hahaha nice try Tomura

so Deku’s all “I didn’t lose my power! BUT” and I assume the “but” is the part where his arms are still broken and shit, and meanwhile Tomura’s body is almost healed up now finally

they’re both wiped out and now AFO is again petitioning Tomura to let him take over goddammit

“you won’t lose your mind” yep, he sure won’t! scout’s honor!! pinky swear!!

meanwhile Deku is getting fucking desperate flkjl;k my baby. and Machia is going to show up any second now too, probably. what else can fucking go wrong at this point

oh shit I shouldn’t have asked

get ready to rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrruuuumble, probably

OH MY GOD

WELL AT LEAST SOMEONE HERE IS HAVING A GOOD TIME. jesus

so as soon as he heard Endeavor was there he got all, “TIME FOR THE BIG REVEAL”, is that right? WELL JOKE’S ON YOU TOUYA, YOUR DAD DOESN’T SEEM ALL THAT CONSCIOUS AT THE MOMENT, SO THAT’S GOING TO DRAIN A LOT OF THE TENSION FROM THE SCENE WHEN YOU GO ALL REVERSE DARTH VADER ON HIM AND HE’S ALL “ZZZZZZZZ”

meanwhile Toga is having unsettlingly quiet angst

jesus christ Toga this is all we need right now

“WAS JIN-KUN NOT A PERSON” sdkfjlk Horikoshi I swear. please have mercy on this fandom. this is the debate that refuses to die!!

but seriously ffs, the issue isn’t that Jin deserved to die, it’s that the countless people whom Jin would have either directly or indirectly killed didn’t deserve to die either. people don’t only become people when you attach names and faces to them! we all loved Jin because we’d gotten to know him, but that doesn’t mean his life was inherently worth more than the lives of all the people he would have killed. sometimes there’s just no good answer

like, it’s just crazy to me that because the heroes are all “we want to protect everyone!” but then aren’t always able to do so because that’s literally impossible, whereas the villains are all “we don’t care about anyone other than the select few people that we actually like!”, the villains somehow wind up getting the better PR. it just so happens that it’s infinitely easier to be loyal to the interests of a few people as opposed to ALL THE PEOPLE. like, no shit, it’s easier to stick to your moral code when you barely have a moral code. and so the villains can kill thousands and no one bats an eye, but if a hero fails to save even one person they’re hypocritical moral failures. like what the hell

BUT ANYWAY, sorry to go off on a tangent there lol, it’s not really a big deal. I’m just preemptively trying to stave off more discourse about it lol but who am I even kidding

anyways lol, but of course they won’t kill you unless they have no choice, Toga. but when it comes to catch-22 situations, it’s a bit much to infer that the heroes don’t consider the villains people just because they opt for the choice that spares more innocent lives. I sure as hell don’t want my babies out here killing people, but to say that they can’t no matter what or else they’re no different from the villains is just...

anyway so the chapter has now just ENDED, just like that!! on a shot of Ochako’s face!

I SENSE ANOTHER THROWDOWN COMING. and it had better not be a total letdown like the last one! NANA BARELY DID ANYTHING HORIKOSHI, WHAT THE FUCK. I started out with such high hopes lol

but I will settle for Toga VS Ochako, and Deku VS Tomura: The Sequel: Shouto’s Revenge! SPEAKING OF HEROES WHO HAVE NO QUALMS ABOUT MURDERING PEOPLE lmao

[walkerwords]

“Love Changes Things” Daryl Dixon x F!Reader

Request From @yes-sir-hotchner​: Request for my man Daryl, “shit changes when you fall in love”.

Word Count: 1842

Warning: None

Song I Wrote To: “I Get To Love You” by Ruelle

Note: Quick little thing. SET AFTER THE S10 FINALE. DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVEN’T SEEN IT. This is a female reader BTW

------------

Everyone was tired and nobody wanted to travel until the sun rose again.

Daryl Dixon paced, trying to stay awake as he waited for you to return. When he and Negan had returned from battling Beta, he had been surprised to see Maggie and that thankfully, most of his people were safe. However, your face was the one still missing in the crowd. Negan had noticed too and he was also on edge, waiting for the one person who he considered to be a best friend to return.

Negan was also avoiding Maggie. Daryl could see the rage in her eyes as she stared at him and he knew that he and Carol would need to speak to her about what happened and soon, but now was not the right time. Instead, he was just focusing on keeping them separated.

Although, he wasn’t exactly being subtle about the worry that plagued him. “You’re going to dig a ditch, Daryl,” Rosita said as she held her daughter, watching as her friend paced.

“Shut up,” Daryl muttered, but did stop moving, placing his hands in his pockets. Judith and RJ were watching their uncle with concern as Judith wrapped her baby brother in a blanket to keep him warm.

It shouldn’t have taken this long for you to get to the meeting point. After losing Beatrice and then the troubles with the herd before Lydia and Carol got it under control, Daryl couldn’t help but think of your dead body out there somewhere and how it was only a matter of time before you rose again.

Daryl was about ready to grab his bow and try to track your movements from the Tower when he finally heard footsteps coming through the trees. Gabriel raised his gun as Maggie pulled back her bow, but when you stumbled into the clearing, Gabriel dropped his weapon immediately with a sigh.

Daryl nearly keeled over with relief as you stepped into the light of the campfire. You were covered in Walker blood and had a slight limp, but you were alive. Not even caring about your macabre appearance, you ran towards Daryl.

He caught you in his arms and you buried your face in his neck, breathing him in as his arms tightened around you. “You’re okay,” you whispered as you clung to him.

“Ya alright?” Daryl asked as he put you down, examining your face and any skin he could see through the blood.

“I’m okay,” you promised him. “Just a bit banged up. Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, (Y/N),” he said, taking a shaky breath.

“Did you…? Is he…?” you attempted to ask.

“We got him,” he said, knowing where your head was at. “Beta’s dead.” The sigh of relief that came from you washed over Daryl and he could see the exhaustion that the war had put on you. It had taken its toll on everyone, but you had lost Jesus, your best friend, Laura too, and it felt great to finally get a win after so much loss.

“Thank God,” you said and then took his face in your hands and pressed a firm kiss to his lips. Daryl kissed you back deeply, not caring about his audience.

From beside you, one of the smaller Grimes chuckled. “Ooh,” Judith sang with a teasing tone. Reaching over, you flicked her hat as you separated from the man in your arms. It was then that you finally noticed Maggie.

Daryl looked between the two of you and then smiled slightly. “I think it’s ‘bout time the two of ya met,” he said and then pulled you towards her.

“Maggie, this is (Y/N), (Y/N), Maggie Rhee,” Daryl introduced. You took the hand she offered and shook it firmly. You had heard a lot about Maggie from Daryl and the others. You had to admit that the woman definitely intimidated you.

“It’s nice to finally meet you, Maggie,” you said sincerely.

“You too,” she said and then looked at Daryl with a mischievous look in her eye. Daryl rolled his eyes at her innuendo and then he caught of something behind your shoulder.

“(Y/N),” Daryl said with a nudge of his head back over towards the other campfire.

“What?” you asked, turning around. You spotted Negan immediately and he seemed almost hesitant to approach. You obviously knew why, but it was still odd to see Negan so...timid. Looking back to Daryl, he was giving you a small, knowing smile.

“Go on,” he said softly, knowing very well that you wanted to talk to him.

“I love you so much,” you said to Daryl and then kissed him on the cheek. You then nodded to Maggie awkwardly and turned your back on them. Walking over to Negan, you were trying to see if he was hurt, but so far, the man looked alright.

As soon as you were close enough to him, he took the remaining steps towards you and hauled you into his arms, picking you up. You gripped him tight, the man that had strangely become your best friend.

“Damn, you scared me,” Negan whispered as he held you.

“I’m not that easy to kill, Negan,” you told him as he placed you back on the ground. Pulling back, you noticed a bruise blooming on his face. “Did Beta do this?”

“Trust me, he looks worse,” Negan joked and you couldn’t help the laugh that escaped you. You leaned your forehead against his chest as he laughed too and then punched him lightly in the shoulder.

“Only you would antagonize him and get your ass beat,” you said.

“I was the distraction so your boyfriend could go in for the kill,” Negan explained.

“And was it epic?”

“Epic as shit, my friend,” Negan declared as he slung his arm around your shoulders. “We were fucking rock stars.”

“That’s my boys,” you said with a grin and he huffed with a roll of his eyes.

“Yeah, whatever,” Negan said and then suddenly the two of you were hit from behind as Lydia barreled into you. Falling to the ground, the teenager hugged the two of you with a laugh. Considering how things had been going for the young woman, you were so happy to hear a laugh come from her as she held on.

Negan grabbed her around the waist and pulled her into his arms, messing her hair up as she pushed him away. You knew that Negan saw the teenager as almost a daughter. He would die to protect her and it seemed as if he almost had.

Across the camp, Judith was laughing at the scene. “Lydia is going to break them if she doesn’t stop squeezing,” Judith said as she watched Lydia hug both you and Negan.

“Go on, go stop her then,” Daryl said and then pushed the kid towards the trio on the ground. Judith grinned and ran over, diving into the pile. Lydia jumped to her feet and began running as Judith followed, chasing the older girl around. Smiles adorned both of their faces as you sat next to Negan, laughing as you watched them.

“How did we get lucky enough to watch these kids grow up,” Negan asked you, bumping your shoulder with his.

“I have no idea,” you said honestly. “Considering I didn’t think I’d make it a year let alone ten, all of this is absolutely crazy to me.”

“You didn’t think you would be able to survive this long?” Negan asked, slightly surprised.

“Honestly? I don’t know. I lost too many groups and then I just happened to stumble across Daryl in the woods this year and I guess I finally found my family.”

“That include me?” Negan asked with a teasing smile.

“Yeah, you’re the annoying older brother I never had,” you told him and he pushed you over. You landed in the leaves with a scoff.

“Just doing my older brother duties,” he mocked with a wink.

“Asshole,” you said. Negan just howled with laughter as he fell onto his back next to you.

———

Maggie watched the interaction in utter confusion.

She then turned her gaze to Daryl who was staring at the woman who seemed way too comfortable around the man that had ruined Maggie’s life. She had never seen so much love in her friend’s eyes before and it only made all of it so much more confusing.

Maggie grabbed Daryl’s arm and pulled him out of his thoughts. He looked at her as she tugged him away from the rest of the group, in hopes of speaking to him in private.

“What?” Daryl asked, still glancing at you over Maggie’s shoulder.

“Your girlfriend is friends with Negan.” It wasn’t a question and it made Daryl grimace.

“Stranger things have happened, Maggie,” Daryl defended, focusing solely on her as he listened to you laugh on the other side of the camp.

“It’s Negan,” Maggie reminded him and he sighed.

“I know, but (Y/N) is (Y/N) and I can’t change who she wants to be friends with. She was in a rough relationship before we met and I ain’t about to be like that controllin’ bastard who once beat on her.”

“I don’t understand how she can be near him like that.”

“She wasn’t with us when the war happened, Maggie,” Daryl reasoned.

“Does she know? Does she know what Negan did?” Maggie asked.

“Yeah, she knows. I told her, Michonne told her, hell, even Negan told her when she asked. She’s got her own opinions on it and him. I don’t get it, but I don’t question it. The two of them, they understand each other.”

“What does that even mean?”

“I didn’t ask,” Daryl said. “All I know is that they connected and she loves him like a brother. I ain’t about to break that up, no matter who it is.”

“I don’t know how you are so calm about this,” Maggie said, shaking her head. “You’re with a woman who sees no problem with being nice to our enemy.”

“He ain’t her enemy, Maggie, and besides, shit changes when you fall in love. As long as she’s happy, I’m happy. Now is not the time to dwell on things like that. We get to build our future now. I love (Y/N) and I’m ready to fight for a future where she and I are safe, where we all are.”

“Even it involves Negan?” she asked, struck.

“If Negan is the only way that she stays in my life, so be it. I’ll take it, Negan and all.”

Daryl turned to fully look at you as you watched Lydia and Judith play with Dog. When you noticed him looking at you, you grinned and he couldn’t help but mirror the expression. Regardless of what happened next, and whether Negan was involved or not, he would never leave your side. Only death would pull him away from you and he was willing to fight death himself too if it meant you could be happy.

TAGS: @thanossexual  @felicisimor @amaroho

[starcharmfunzies]

Could you please explain to us, in incredibly insane,DEEP detail, why you hate Mickey? From point A to point Z. I’ll get my popcorn ready.

under the cut cause this got long and I'm very passionate about the topic

---

okay so the year is 2010

BbS came out and the fanbase is heartbroken (including myself) over what happened to Terra, Aqua and Ven. At this point in the franchise Mickey although shady seems like a decent dude, so I didn't have any strong opinions towards him, only that he was this mysterious and seemingly OP king. Let's recap though.

In KH1 he wasn't very communicative with Donald and Goofy, but when he finally showed up at the very end it was to close Kingdom Hearts and ngl it was a pretty hype moment. So far so good.

In Re:Chain of Memories he again does not approach Donald and Goofy -and Sora- even though they were still looking for him, but it was for a very good cause as he stayed with Riku to help him fight Ansem Seeker of Darkness. Here I actually thought well of him.

In KH2 he's still being beyond secretive but he finally joins the gang to explain some things and fight alongside everyone to defeat Xemnas. Honestly he's got no bad record so far; he may be a douche sometimes since he barely explains himself but I could understand because of the circumstances.

So BbS happens. We get insight on how he was involved with TAV and I actually felt kinda bad for Mickey since he hadn't been able to do much to help them, and for all he knew in the worst case scenario they all died.

But then in 2011 Re:Coded came out, and with it its secret movie.

In the secret movie Mickey and Yen Sid have the following exchange:

M: Yen Sid, I think we're finally close to figuring out where Ven's heart is.

Y: Is that so? Then that leaves only Terra.

Hold the fuck up. Only Terra? As in, they already knew where Aqua was?

Why hadn't they gone after her then?????

This secret movie left a bitter taste in my mouth. I started questioning everything. For how long had they known? Why hadn't they done anything? What the fuck were they waiting for?

Sadly in 2012 with DDD's release I didn't get answers to any of these questions, and when Mickey told Xehanort that he hoped TAV sacrificing themselves hadn't been in vain it just got me more angry.

How dare you talk about them as if they were dead. How dare you utter Aqua's name when you know damn well where she is and you know damn well that it's almost fucking impossible to get out of that place without help. YOU could help her Michael. But no, you're just talking about her like she was just a bad memory you wanted to forget.

I was pissed.

And I stayed pissed for the next 5 years, with no main games coming out and only my memories of the past games to look back on Mickey's behavior. Since when had he known that Aqua was in the Realm of Darkness? Since KH1 when he helped Sora close the door to Kingdom Hearts? Since Re:Chain of Memories when he was helping Riku overcome his own darkness? Since KH2 when he was infiltrating the Organization? Since way before KH1? Just how long had he been walking around knowing of this and deciding to do nothing about it?

But not only was I angry at Mickey. I was desperate. How long would I be waiting until Aqua was saved? Would she even be saved at all? Information about her was scarce, and BbS volume 2 seemed nothing but a distant dream, but with DDD being the prelude to the final battle against Xehanort I was hopeful the next main game would finally have her involved again.

So you can imagine how excited I was when we got the first trailer for KH 2.8 that included A Fragmentary Passage.

That image of the back of her head gave me hope. Hope that she was still okay, still fighting, and that she would be saved soon.

And on January 2017 we finally found what had happened to her before she made it to that fateful beach.

And boy I wasn't happy.

The reason Mickey knew Aqua was in the Realm of Darkness was because he met her there, right before he helped close Kingdom Hearts. And of course I don't blame him for getting separated from Aqua, it was the demon tower's fault and I understand he couldn't do much being in a hurry and all to get to the door.

But shouldn't he have tried to find her right after???

I get that there's only so much Nomura can tie back to plot-wise as he writes along, but the matter of fact at this point is that:

Mickey stayed with Riku after closing Kingdom Hearts and didn't say a word to him about Aqua.

We don't know whether Mickey tried to search for her or not, but it sure as hell didn't stop him from leaving the Realm of Darkness when he had the chance.

So after escaping the Realm of Darkness Mickey eventually went to Yen Sid and told him he found Aqua, and Yen Sid told him to not try anything yet as they were unprepared to rescue her.

And OF COURSE, this is the one time Mickey decides to listen to him. Not unlike ALL the other times he went around and did whatever the fuck he wanted. Like when he ran away with the star shard in BbS despite Yen Sid telling him not to get involved, or when he went to confront fucking Xehanort and only got saved because of Ven, or when he abandoned Disney Castle without warning to do things by himself and just left a shitty note with a half-assed explanation, or when he jumped after Xemnas into the dark corridor and left behind everyone in Radiant Garden.

Nah, it's this ONE time in particular that Mickey decides to be a goody-two-shoes and not do anything reckless for a change.

Wasn't Aqua his friend? Didn't he form a D-link with her because they got close? Hadn't he done all the dangerous things he did in the past because he wanted to look after those he cared for and loved?

And not only did he decide to do nothing, but he didn't say a THING about her to anyone. So what if Sora and/or Riku planned a reckless rescue? Mickey had already done worse than that! And BESIDES, Sora and Riku did manage to get out of the Realm of Darkness once so they could have very well done it again a second time.

BUT HEY at least 0.2 ended with Mickey and Riku deciding to finally go get Aqua, so there's hope. That is until 2019, another 2 years later, that KH3 comes out. Mickey and Riku finally go to the Realm of Darkness to look for her, but when they get to the beach and find she's not there what does Mickey decide to do?

HE DECIDES TO LEAVE AGAIN.

It's been 10+ years already what's a little more time am I right fellas???

Reminder that Mickey supposedly considers Aqua a friend btw.

Michael you were there in the Realm of Darkness, you know how dangerous it is, you saw how at the verge of giving up Aqua was, and you decide to keep her waiting even more? What the hell is wrong with you?!

It's like he doesn't even care about her at all. It's so unsettling how carefree he is about it.

And you know what? Had Mickey decided to go save Aqua sooner they might have actually gotten to her before her confrontation with Ansem Seeker of Darkness, and they would have spared her plenty of suffering.

But what do I know.

Anyway, Aqua gets saved (by Sora btw, not Mickey), and in the process she calls Mickey out on his bullshit and he agrees he messed up. He even apologized. That did make me feel better, it was cathartic, and although I was still sore about everything he did now that TAV was back together safe and sound I was considering cutting Mickey some slack. I'll give him credit, I did get a little impressed with what he did in Re:Mind. Credit where credit is due.

But then Melody of Memory happened.

sigh

The moment this asshole found out that Riku went by himself to search for Sora to this strange world of unreality what is the first thing he does?

He bolts to the fucking door ready to go after Riku. And had it not been for Donald and Goofy tackling him to the ground he could have very well ran off.

Why wasn't he this worried over Aqua? When he found her she had already spent 10 years in the Realm of Darkness, a very VERY dangerous place. And yet when he made it out he wasn't worried at all and let her stay 2-3 years more in there?? Riku had left like a fucking hour ago and it was enough to have Mickey panicking COME ON. Biased much?

So there you have it. No matter what Mickey does in the future of the franchise I don't think I'll ever have the heart to forgive him. I was willing to do so, but of course he made me change my mind rather quickly.

I'm glad newcomers to the series share these feelings of not being fond of Mickey, but I don't think they'll go through the same experience that the people that followed the games did. Most of us liked Mickey at the beginning, but through the years we realized with horror that we had been deceived, and we were left to wallow in our rage while we hopelessly waited for someone, anyone, to save Aqua.

[hannya-writes]

Hihihi! I know it's kinda crazy and I just found your acc but I was LITERALLY thinking about a Marvel-SVU crossover and found yoooooou. I mean... The algorithm lead me to you. It's ✨ Destiny ✨ haha So I was wondering if you could write something Marvel-SVU kinda with Carisi x reader (i don't know if you watch agents of shield) where reader has to go UC for Shield and falls in love with him and he finds out she's Shield etc. I don't know if I'm making any sense rn I'm just really happy I found you. And now I sound creepy but it's already too late and I'm sending this.

Dear @lapaquerette : I do not watch Agents of shield, but I did my best! I swear I did! 😭 you totally made sense! But I feel like there's part of this story that are not so good, anyways~ let's get to the story!!

Title: Don't Tell anyone

Fandom: MCU and Law and order SVU

Pairing: Sonny Caruso x Reader

Other characters: no, I think no

Category: romance

Warnings: this doesn't have a happy ending bc I'm bad writing those! This is long I think.

Author's note: for a moment I thought of making this a serie, but my head couldn't stand it! I don't feel like I can picture Carisi in the right way so probably he's going to be very OOC. Also I'm not supper proud of this because I literally did what I wanted with the time line, Captain America: Winter Soldier happens in 2016 however Caruso es ADA in 2020 if I'm not wrong but in this case the events of winter soldier happen in 2020. Also there's like 2 years of difference btw WS and Civil War, and I tried my best! To make everything fit, but you know, you can kick my ass in comments.

• • •

The mission was supposed to last just a couple of days. Y/n had to pose as an assistant to the Junior ADA's why did they need assistance she didn't know, but when Nick fury assigned her there she just didn't dared to ask.

"Find out what's going on there" he had said as if it was a life or dead situation.

Pepto. That's what happened. High expectations was the other thing happening. The Junior ADA's where being pressed, running towards death case by case.

It was boring, the first two days Y/n had played "who's the jerk of the room?" She had found more than one, stress made that to people. Who cares about cordiality when they had to put people in jail? The answer was Dominic "Sonny" Carisi.

Sonny never yelled or snapped at people, he always asked nicely about papers, he said "Good Morning" and "thank you". He was a gentleman, a knight in a shiny armor. He made funny jokes even when he was struggling with a case.

Y/n had felt a weird desire to help him after just one encounter. The puppy eyes, she reasoned. After that day when he was in court she appeared there, sat and suddenly the people being cross-examined poured the truth without control or bursted in fit of rage confessing everything. She wasn't making something bad, she was helping, which she was supposed to do. No one was going to link her to those incidents. No one knew what she could do.

— copies, now — one of ADA's order her and she almost pushed the asshole and told him to do it himself, it was only a copy machine, he only had to push a button! However, Y/n was a trained spy, she had control over every muscle in her face to not make a disgusted expression at the tall and skinny man. 63 ways to kill him appeared in her head in a second.

— Sure thing — she said in a gently tone, entertaining her mind in the more horrible ways to deal with Tommy.

Tommy Parish, a bully in and out of court, linked to the Irish Mafia. He thought he was a big fish, prepotent but surprisingly brilliant. He was like a weasel. He wasn't that important. Shield wasn't interested by his night activities. They thought there was something else, something more important. Y/n didn't think so. The more interesting thing there was...

— Oh, Sorry didn't meant to...— Sonny said as he almost hit Y/n with the door.

— my fault, I was standing here like a creep — she took the guilt with a sheepish smile.

— A penny for your thoughts — he said as he walked outside and Y/n instinctively followed, as she usually followed after director Nick Fury,

— I think I'm being punished — she said while walking aimlessly, if Sonny had walked in the male restroom she would have probably followed him blindly.

— punish? For what? Did Tommy said something mean to you again? — the blond man sounded concerned and for Y/n it was refreshing, people around her tended to be more defensive around her than being worried about her well being.

— no! I think Tommy is warming up to me — Y/n said proudly — it's my umm... Dad, he send me to live here and I think is because he is mad at me —

There was a small silence, but it wasn't uncomfortable.

— why would he be mad? You are amazing! — Sonny sounded so positive and brilliant, he always seemed to have that aura around him, even in the worst cases. Y/n noticed it, and worried her when he started to lose his shine.

— in my last job, I made a mistake and people got hurt — the confession was sincere. She wasn't lying, she was omitting that those people didn't just "got hurt", they died. She had killed them.

— You are human, humans make mistakes — he said stopping in front of an embellished door. — talk later? — he asked and Y/n nodded with a smile.

•••

After a month everything still was normal. No conspicuous action, no weird people. Y/n wondered why was she there? Was she really being punished by Fury? She had made a mistake, she had chose to save a person, she couldn't know that the objective was going to detonate the whole place. She couldn't read every single thought, her brain would melt if she even tried.

— Sorry, I need to... — said Sonny pointing at the copy machine, y/n blushed for being caught spacing out, again for the 4 time in a week

— I'm so sorry, allow me — y/n extended a hand offering to make the copy for Carisi.

— don't worry, I can push a button — he said making her smile and feel weird.

— please Mr. Carisi, let me be of help — she offered tilting her head a little bit, Sonny found that little action distracting and cute enough to give her the papers he needed to copy.

He saw her move, she was so elegant even just making copies.

— thank you — he told her sighing exhausted.

— don't worry Mr. Carisi, I'll do this, get it in a folder and get it back to you, why don't you go rest your eyes a bit? — she asked with a smile, noticing his tired demeanor

— I'll do it, if you start calling me Sonny — he negotiated and she laughed whole heartedly — come on, everytime you call me Mr. Carisi I feel like you are talking to my father —

— fine, you got yourself a deal — she offered her hand and he took her in his bigger one. Sonny felt asleep with the sound of the copy machine working.

— Sonny, Sonny — Y/n soft voice took him out of dreamland, he found out in that moment that his Nickname sounded awesome from Y/n lips.

•••

From Sonny's eyes y/n was an amazing woman who was able to help everyone with their tasks, she made copies, keep archives ordered, got everything for everyone. She made time to know all of the junior's ADA's of "her room", she served coffee when needed, got them food, kept clean clothes for them just in case. She was like a mother. Sometimes she even helped them found the info they needed. She made all of that and made it with a polite smile. She had been there for like a year and their interactions where short, but he was head over heels for her.

Why? Because she got a great sense of humor, she was nice, smart, sassy when needed, had an excellent memory, she made the best black coffee he had ever tasted. She never got nervous no matter the circumstances. He didn't understand how or why was she assigned to be the "mother hen" of 7 ADA's, but he was thankful. Some days became better the moment she gave him a smile and he imagined that smile was just for him.

Sonny pinched the bridge of his nose in pain. It was past midnight and he was still in his office, working on papers. Practicing his opening statement.

— the truth... The truth....— he repeated trying to remember the next point of the speach. He grunted frustrated.

— Sonny? — the sudden voice made the attorney jump and Y/n laughed.

— Geez, doll! — he exclaimed surprised — You should use a bell — added more awake than before.

— doll? — Y/n questioned rising an eyebrow, Sonny turned red.

— Sorry, I didn't mean to disrespect you — he quickly apologized.

— you didn't, I actually like it — she admitted — I'll allow it — added in a solemn voice — with a condition councilor, only in private I don't need more gossips going around—

After saying those words, Y/n knew that she was digging her own grave. She liked Sonny.

•••

Y/n looked at her phone horrified. Nick had send her and encrypted message. Which was resumed to: You are free of SHIELD, live the life of Y/n Veith. The life he had created for her, an identity that couldn't be connected to the Spy agency. Y/n Y/l/n had died in what they called something like the purge of Hydra. He didn't needed her. He had died. Captain america had basically destroyed the corrupted SHIELD. This was her life now. She was what? a secretary? An assistant?

She should had fail with SHIELD, she should had been there with Fury, protecting him. But she didn't. She pretended nothing happened and followed his last order to her: live like Y/n Veith.

She went with the flow. Acted like everything was just fine, made a routine, followed it to the last point. Untill one day out of the blue she broke down crying in Sonny's office. He was her friend.

— what happened? — he asked on the other side of the desk, surprised that in the middle of his speech, y/n started crying. The case was difficult, a father died to protect his daughter. The teenager girl had been raped and her father was killed by the rapist. It was way more complicated but, that were the facts.

— sorry, sorry — she said cleaning her face with her hands, Sonny approached and offered her a handkerchief that she took hesitantly. — I lost, I lost him — she stuttered.

Sonny kneeled by her side, took the handkerchief and cleaned her beautiful face.

— I'm so sorry, doll — he said even if he didn't understand, Y/n felt his consternation.

— my father died — she said with a soft voice — my house burned down — she added and Sonny understood, her father adopted her, he had saved her and then lost it all. The case had hit too close to her.

— Come on, we had enough of this case — he decided getting up, taking her hands to get her to stand — I'll take you home — he said and she smiled with sadness.

— I don't want to go to my department — she confessed getting up and Sonny gave her a soothing smile.

— We can go to my place — he offered without a second intention, she nodded and they walked away from the office, Sonny ordered an Uber.

Outside of One Hogan place with a heavy heart, y/n leaned against Sonny and he hugged her while waiting for their ride, and during the ride.

Y/n fell asleep without nightmares for the first time in the 6 months after the dead of Nick. Sonny by her side, over the covers and behind a "wall" of pillows fell asleep with the image of a peaceful Y/n.

•••

Three months later, Y/n entered Sonny's little office, she said a "sorry to interrupt", the blond man stopped writing and turned to her eagerly, he tried to suppress his desire to look into her eyes but he wasn't that good at that.

He hadn't seen her in more than 14 days thanks to his overflow of cases and her being stole by homicides DA, who had discovered she was very good in investing.

She muttered a "what?" In mockery, as if the distance and time hadn't even happened and added a "I got you a donut!". A donut that he had craved since morning but wasn't able to get. He sighed a laugh, sometimes it was as if she could read his mind.

— you are life saver, doll— he sighed in relief taking the donut from her hand.

— Should I get you some coffee? — she asked with that caring tone that made him feel special.

— I would love that — he accepted as she merrily went to the coffee machine and poured him a cup and then a glass of water.

Sonny wondered about where did those pretty and elegant glasses came from, have they always been there? She left a bag in the table and walked back to him. He pretended to be working but it was hard to act when she was walking towards him with that dark red pencil skirt that hug perfectly the curb of her hips, the black blouse making contrast, hanging a bit loose over her torso.

— thanks doll — he said when she put the coffee and water in a corner of the desk, he looked at her with a smile — water? — he asked with a joking tone, y/n nodded

— yes, sir — she said in the same joking mood — I took an account of the caffeine you ingest by day, this could be dangerous for your health, so for every cup of caffeine, one of water — she explained with as much confidence as a lawyer making an opening statement.

— are you worried about me? — he was almost flirting, she blushed even if they sometimes flirted a bit.

— I worry about all of you — she pointed out and gave a mischievous smile that made Sonny blush.

— thank you, doll — he quipped with a smile, she smiled back and walked away to Parish desk, the man sat there looked down to his papers as Y/n put a bagel by his hand.

Sonny noticed how Tommy's ears got as read as a tomato and turned to look at her with adoration, the same look the other ADA's got everytime she was near. He had seen how things slowly changed with Y/n presence, at first they were rude, condescending, then they realized that she was excellent in her work. She had saved all of them more than once with little actions.

Y/n had a charming aura and some men in the office had asked her out, Tommy included, but she always turned them down, with an excellent excuse. "I'm seeing someone".

Carisi wondered who. Who was she dating?

•••

— Coffee — she announced as she took a folder and put it carefully away.

Sonny smiled and suddenly thought of Y/n lie about she seeing someone. She had never tell him about her boyfriend, he thought of all of those slice of life moments they had, the banters they have, the many times she had helped him. The times she would stay in his apartment so she wouldn't be alone.

Was he the person she was seeing?

— do you have plans for tonight? — he asked abruptly and Y/n looked at him surprised.

— I got a date with my bed, but I can reschedule — she offered with a smile, she could rest later, she had to enjoy every moment with Sonny.

— do it, I'll take you to a wonderful place — He said with all of his confidence, she giggled — after work? — she nodded contently.

— It's a deal — she said before walking away with a big smile in her face.

Sonny felt stupidly happy. It was him. She was dating him unofficially.

•••

That night Y/n tried to look as perfect as was possible in work clothes, she had refreshed herself, use a little more of make up. She was excited, she really liked Sonny and had wanted to go on a date with him, no work talk, no solving ways to state a question. She wanted to know him in a more personal way.

They sat in a table of a nice looking bar, a decent one. It wasn't pretentious, they actually served food and not just greasy fast food. She had told him distorted versions of stories with her "family and friends", (since she couldn't talk about her real life and training) like that time her father had taught her how to use a gun for her homework and she discovered she had weak fingers.

She heard about his time as a Police officer, a detective nonetheless! Sargent Benson seemed to be a very empathic person, Detective Tutuola was definitely a funny man, Amanda was for him like one more of his sisters. And Sonny discovered that she was adopted by a man called Nick, Nick Veith he guessed, since he thought that was her real last name.

She had two "adopted" sister and a brother: Maria, Natalie and Clinton. Maria was righteous, Nat was smart and sassy, Clint was funny and sometimes really annoying. Sonny thought he would get along easily with them.

They laughed between stories, they were getting fun untill Y/n felt there was something wrong. Something was about to happen. Something bad.

— Something wrong? — Y/n barely registered Sonny's voice before jumping over him yelling a "get down". A telekinetic wake made the other around people fall to the ground just in time as a rain of bullets came from the broken windows.

Sonny heard the glass breaking, people screaming in panic. Saw the bullets fly over him and the bottles in the bar breaking in slow motion. He had never experienced anything like that. The light weight of Y/n over him. And his monkey mind thought about how right that felt.

There was a "clank" from a gas' bomb, then a flash and a cloud of white smoke. People stood up and started running.

— Y/n — Sonny pulled her to see her face, he thought she would be scared, paralyzed from fear. However, when he saw her face there was no fear, she seemed confused, puzzled. — come on, we have to move —

Y/n was thinking the same, but she didn't know what was the right move: defend everyone there using her not-so-human powers? Run away and pretend to be a delicate woman, scared of the situation?

— doll? — Sonny sounded worried and in almost panic, a switch turned as boots hit the floor of the bar.

— Stay behind me — Y/n said with confidence getting up, feeling the presence of 8 people surrounding them, circling them. — and... — she looked at Sonny worried — don't get scared — she pleaded softly.

— Y/n Y/l/n surrender yourself — someone yelled and the woman felt her skin crawl, she hadn't hear her name in more than a year. It sounded good.

— is this about the accords? — She thought, aware of the Sokovia accords and what they proposed. She hadn't signed them. No one was supposed to know about her, her powers, she hadn't expected the government to notice her.

Nat? Clint? Maybe Maria had told them.

— That's right, put your hands in the air — the man ordered in a shout. Y/n closed her eyes and closed her hand in a thigh fist, making the fog disappear.

— Sorry, I can't do that— she confessed pushing the man with telekinesis. — I'm not a weapon you can use —

A new row of bullets flew towards Y/n and Sonny. A bright green light appeared in her eyes and all of the bullets stopped in the air, traces of the same light that made Y/n shine seemed to contain the little bullets like tendrills, the bullets turned in the air pointing at the squadron that was attacking her

— Y/n, no! — Sonny made her react, the tendrills disappeared and the bullets fell useless to the ground as the woman turned to see the Attorney.

— Sonny, sonny — she stuttered worried— no, no, no, no, I would never hurt them, I'm not a monster, I'm not! — she said almost in panic,not because of the attack but for the ideas Sonny could get.

Sonny saw the green and now red light form an eyes over Y/n, then monsters from nightmares formed from the light, monsters like dogs, with skulls covering the hideous animals with blood dripping from their snouts, bodies wet with a black substance. The animals roared and jumped to defend them.

Y/n saw fear in Sonny's eyes. She recognized it, a bright tendril started to form in the exact point of her heart, the fear taking form in her presence. Her hand squished the light over her chest, stopping something else to form.

He didn't know what to say. Carisi knew about the avengers, the new york incident had affected his work, he had saw everything about "ultron", he was informed about Tony Stark and the avengers every move. But he didn't know what was he supposed to say? "Sign the accords" was what he wanted to say. It was selfish for him to ask that, he couldn't do it.

— doll, you're not a monster— he finally found his own voice to say that. — but you have to go —

— Sonny, I... — the ADA put a strand of hair behind Y/n ear taking her by surprise.

— If you don't mind, I'll like to kiss you — he said making her blink in disbelief.

— yes please...— she said and Carisi smiled brightly, his large hand caressed her cheek and softly leave a tender kiss in her soft lips. It barely lasted more than a second. When Carisi opened up his eyes, everything was back to normal. Like a couple of minutes ago, right before the shooting.

In the table was a note: "Don't tell anyone" he recognized Y/n writing. He wondered if everything had been a dream, a hallucination. A part of him told him that no, that couldn't be his imagination. Y/n had left.

[doks-aux]

Alrighty. I collected all my posts about my burgeoning horror story under the same tag. (Just calling it that until I have an actual title of sorts.) And here I’m dumping all the brainstorming and shit posts I made about it on my priv Twitter so I have them all in one place and can see the progression of it.

It still hasn’t quite come together, but I’m having fun poking at it.

--

*steeples fingers* I should make a horror story

Well, technically the haunted amusement park thing is, but it's more comedic. It's about two security guards who work the nightshift at an amusement park and have to contend with ghosts, possessed animatronics, and serial killers.

One is an engineering student and robot/monsterfucking horror fan who's having the time of her life, and the other is a very nice girl who recently was moved to this position as punishment by her shitty boss and has no idea beforehand what goes on at night.

The first girl has a pet domesticated fox who might be a former witch's familiar. Still not sure what's happening with that.

But it's just dumb and silly and gay and spooky and maybe gory, and might be part of a larger setting that includes a library with a history of cult activity and a night shift crew at a 24hr grocery store who protect their town from monsters and the end of the world.

Birget and Simon are well-suited to horror, but I can never quite pin their story down. It's more on the supernatural side, too. And then there's a set of characters that I've put in both a DnD-like vampire setting and a magic girl/urban fantasy horror one.

But I feel like I want a more... grounded universe to play in? Or at least a more slasher-styled story. Hmm.

--

What if I made a story that's to Saw what Scream is to slasher movies? 🤔

But then I'd have to actually watch the Saw movies. Ugh.

I just like the idea of like... a Saw story in a world where the Saw movies exist. Someone who got inspired and tried to be a Jigsaw figure would probably be some judgmental anti-vaxxing asshole and also would be really, really BAD at it.

Who the hell is gonna have the ridiculous varied expertise and connections to pull some Jigsaw shit off? No one!

--

I like... characters... that wear animal ear hats…

Am I making a new character that wears one? Ooh, mysterious~

What's better? A wolf-eared hoodie or a wolf ear hat?

This character is a grown person, btw. You're never too old in your heart for animal ear accessories.

I think this is my horror protag

--

What if I went full 14-year-old girl and made an Easton expy for my horror protag to gently romance?

--

My horror story has only the vaguest concept and the vaguest idea of a cast, but it sure does have a song already.

It's “Death Valley” by Fall Out Boy.

--

I should get back to my horror protag and crafting a little meow meow for them.

Protag doesn't even have a name yet. I've been calling them Wolf in my head 'cause of the hat.

They'll be about as self-insert as I can comfortably get. Which isn't much, but I'm trying to expand my comfort zone.

--

Horror protag isn't so much a self-insert as they are my raging id personified.

--

I need to stop finding songs for Wolfy, they don't even have a name or motivation or an actual plot.

--

What I know about Wolfy so far:

33 years old

Works in a comic shop (assistant manager?)

They/She/He

Probably has liquified gummy candy in their veins instead of blood

Monsterfucker

Only takes off the hat to shower

--

Wolfy has Shane Madej's aggressive disrespect for ghosts and monsters while wholeheartedly believing in and liking them.

They just wanna start some shit.

"LET'S FUCKING GO, MOTHMAN!"

"BEST ME NOW IN COMBAT OR SUBMIT AND BE MY BRIDE!"

Ghosts and monsters are much more fun than masked serial killers and septic death traps.

Hotter, too.

--

Easton expy might be the only one actually initially injured. For the sole purpose of being able to provide comfort.

I mean I have potential plot reasons for it but it's mostly to fuss over him.

--

Very tempted to call my horror story (or at least the first part of it, depending) "Little Pig, Little Pig."

🎵🎶Who's afraid of the big bad wolf, the big bad wolf, the big bad wolf?🎶🎵

--

Wolfy vibes are like... "What's My Age Again?" by blink-182 but it's 33 instead of 23.

--

On the one hand, I want to make goofy stories about weirdos dealing with lots of different horror genres.

On the other, I want to make an at least semi-thoughtful deconstruction of Saw that leans heavily on the idealistic side of the scale and works under the belief that people are basically good and want to help each other.

--

Wolfy might have a real name.

Bellamy Logan

Lam

Though some other characters probably do call them Wolfy at least once.

--

Not sure if the cast of my horror story should know each other at all or be complete strangers at the start.

--

I barely have my horror cast imagined, and I'm already pairing them off.

Spoiler alert: Nobody's straight

--

Bellamy is my little snarl snarl.

Small and ready to brawl.

[aileysmirnov]

Loki x Ailey hc! part 1

I was watching Thor Ragnarok with some friends (over zoom ofc) and then It popped up in my head a conversation that I had with @melyaliz and Alex (ig: shir.0_guru) a while back, and I couldn't shake it off my brain as I was trying to write some other thing. So hopefully writing this down would apace my mind.

TW: Arranged marriage, depictions of emotional/psychological abuse

Summary: Eris and Odin find a solution to what's been threatening their domains, an alliance between 2 of the most powerful families, but Ailey and Loki don't seem so keen about it.

Disclaimer/notes: Ailey is my OC! You can learn more about her in here!

Ailey has finally been reunited with most of her family and entered the realm of gods in this AU.

Samaras is the last name of the Eris family, they are rulers of Thera (Eris kingdom) and each member bears a royal title.

Ailey is the only demi-goddess in her family, Demigods are seen as shameful in this AU and usually they have a birthmark and a weakness that distinguishes them as such. In Ailey's case is her golden rose hair once she transforms in her god-form and her weakness is her allergy to gold, it practically burns her skin, debilitates her magic and herself, is like kryptonite for her.

◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇

The only reason they even know about the other, is because of their parents: Eris had been in conflict with Ares lately, and one of his recent attacks greatly debilitated her army and Odin had trouble with a few of the realms under his command forming complots against him and the safety of Asgard.

Both rulers found themselves in need of the other: Odin had the greatest warriors and military at his service, and Eris being the goddess of discord could easily rise or disipate any conflict that may come her way (except for Ares ofc), an easy way in or out of war.

And so, they decided to form an alliance; But Odin being the wise men he is, knew better than to trust blindly in the goddess of chaos, after all...Eris was known for being a backstabber who acted only to beneficiate her own interests.

To prevent that, Odin decided to make the alliance under the condition that one member of the Samaras family must marry the second son: Loki, God of mischief. And so, Eris agreed and offered her youngest daughter: Ailey goddess of ruin and folly.

God it was an absolute mess since the beginning!

Frigga was the one to inform Loki, who immediately went to Odin to protest, but like always his father ignored him, shutting him down by comparing him to his brother and how he would do anything to protect Asgard but Loki was being selfish.

Ailey in the other hand was kept ignorant of such decision and only knew about it a few hours before the engagement party began and only because a servant accidentally told her.

She was furious and much like Loki tried to protest but Eris couldn't care less about her daughter's opinion.

Ailey could rage all she wanted, Eris wasn't even paying attention, the only thing she was accomplishing was in making her angry.

—Child, I think you tend to forget your place in this world, you see: among humans you might be...special but in here... you're just an idiot with too much privilege—Eris had a way with words that could make them feel like poison, creeping in to the insecurities of one's heart.

—If it weren't for me and your brothers, you would be Hera's new toy, so please remember, dear. You not only owe me but to your brothers and this kingdom as well.

Ailey headed back to her room feeling ashamed and angry, she felt her mother's words had some truth in them, seeing as how different she was viewed here in comparison to the human realm.

When the time came for the engagement party and for Ailey and Loki to meet for the first time, is fair to say neither of them were in a good mood.

Even though deep inside they knew both of them didn't have any say in the matter and were pretty much in the same situation; they still felt irrationally mad at each other, that's why since the moment they met to the end of the ceremony they would throw little passive-aggressive remarks at each other.

She viewed him as a pretentious asshole, and He saw her as a spoiled brat.

Almost near the end of the celebration and no announcement had been made so Eris took it upon herself to throw them into the spotlight.

—I believe you two have something important to share with all of us—her face was smiling but her eyes were threatening.

Ailey bit the inner side of her cheek, rolled her eyes as she turned to face Loki who only gave an exasperated sigh before speaking in a monotone voice

—Do you want to marry me?—he didn't even bothered to get on one knee and just extended the ring for her to take.

Ailey felt tempted to say "no" and walk away gracefully but doing that would probably have a negative impact on Thera, so after a long pause she answered.

—Whatever—and put the ring on, herself.

Clearly a good start :) .

I think they didn't saw each other that much afterwards and when they did it was mostly for wedding arrangements in which they continued with the passive-aggressive comments but this time about everything the other would pick.

The mood was so uncomfortable every time they were together everyone around them was like:

I think that sometimes they would have moments where they realize they had been too harsh with the other and would tone it down a little but treating each other like that was the only way of protest that was allowed for them.

Specially for Loki since he constantly had to travel to Thera bc for some reason unknown to him Ailey refused to go to Asgard, which only made his negative opinion on her grow.

In his mind, it was probably because she thought she was too good for Asgard but the reality was: Asgard is practically a death sentence for Ailey since 90% of every building in there was made of gold.

But she will never tell him that.

I think their first "moment of closeness" came to be purely out of the realization neither of them had any option other than get married or see their domains destroyed.

So, they decided to call it a truce: both would play along with the whole marriage fiasco for a while until things died down and then they could divorce and pretend they never even met.

And so, the passive-aggressive comments slowly died down, not that they started acting like lovers all of a sudden, instead they acted like they were just... co-workers or something.

They would greet each other in a formal manner and then only talked about the arrangements and left, nothing else.

But then, inevitably they started to get closer.

It was something so gradual none of them really knew how it happened.

It started off with small comments about decoration ideas for the venue, it turns out they both had quite the interest in interior design.

Eventually those small comments became lengthy conversations about which combination of colors would look the best.

When it came down to learning about the nobility attending the wedding on each side, both would spend a little more time together. Studying the proper way on how to address them and their interests all for the possibility in forming new alliances.

But I feel like instead they would roast the hell out of them, like they would be going through a list of the Asgardian nobility that were to attend and Ailey would just point at a picture of a random Asgardian noble and go: "Oh. My. God. what is he even wearing?"

And Loki would try to force back a smile or a laugh but eventually he would just give in and start joining Ailey in the roasting.

They also have a very similar sense of humor, but Ailey is just more blunt and open about it while Loki isn't, I feel like most of the time he has genius comebacks to stupid comments people make but he's a gentleman and normally just keeps it to himself or would only say it in a polite but slightly aggressive manner, so when Ailey just bluntly says something similar to what he was thinking he can't help but laugh a bit (he won't admit to it though)

Other things Ailey and Loki have in common is their love for drama and spectacle, while Ailey is more of a ballet/dance-based plays person, she understands Loki’s enthusiasm for theater and books even sharing some of it herself.

Not only they enjoy these things, but they also found comfort in them: For Ailey ballet began as something her mother forced upon her but transformed in an outlet for her emotions and a way to connect and control her powers.

For Loki theater was a form of escapism since he was a child, every time he felt like he didn’t belong he found a safe place in countless stories of the misunderstood heroes.

This only makes their bond grow deeper; up until this point they never had anyone to talk to about their interests in such depth, so now they talk all the time about it, sometimes they would surprise themselves looking forward to the next meeting just to gush about a new play or book they just saw or read.

I feel like Loki might’ve even lend Ailey some copies of his favorite books and Ailey as a “thank you” decided to sneek out with him to the human realm to watch "Tristan und Isolde".

Everyone is able to notice the change in attitude of these two, especially Thor who only had heard about the girl but could tell how happy she made him every time Loki would mention her.

And he was happy for his brother but felt curious about his soon to be sister-in-law.

So, it was only natural when Thor asked Loki if he could tag along the next time he went to Thera.

He said no.

Thor went anyways.

When Ailey met him, she could only think about one thing: "he himbo" which she thought was cute btw.

Thor could see why Loki liked this girl so much, they were practically the same, which he found sweet yet amusing.

—Lady Ailey, a pleasure to meet you, mi brother has told me a lot about you!—he stated.

—Really?!—Ailey questioned directing an incredulous glance at Loki. 

—He asked­—Loki tried to defend himself by downplaying his brother statement. 

—No, I didn’t.—Thor retaliated with a mocking smile, he could tell his brother felt embarrassed so he decided to tease him a bit more. 

—In fact, he won’t shut up about you. 

—That’s not true, he’s just.. 

—No, he’s all the time saying Ailey this, Ailey that. It peaked my curiosity and so here I am… 

—Brother, Could you shut up?—Ailey could only smile and hold back a laugh at the brothers spontaneous quarrel. 

Truth is she thought it was sweet of Loki to talk about her with his brother. And teases him about it afterwards.

I think Thor might talk privately with Ailey and would ask her to take care of his brother. 

—I know Loki can be a bit…difficult, but have patience with him, I can tell he really likes you. 

And Thor was correct, Loki really did like her. But it might take a while for him to come to terms with his feelings, and would only manifest in small gestures towards Ailey, like: tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear, subconsciously offering his arm for her to take as support when walking down the stairs, placing a hand on the small of her back as guidance whenever they were in a crowded space, sneaking small glances at her, etc.

Overall, he starts acting a lot softer with her, a lot more caring.

Ailey might be a bit oblivious to this (since she’s only used to overly sexual advances and has a difficult time understanding genuine affection), but she appreciates it none the less.

And both might even find themselves thinking that maybe…just maybe spending the rest of their lives together isn’t a bad idea after all.

[wreckofawriter]

Revenge

Pairing: Fred Weasley x reader

Word Count: 2,545

Request: Hi love, can I get 82 and 78 with Fred Weasley? I love your writing btw 💕💕💕

78: "This is illegal isnt it?"

82: "I will face god as I walk backward into hell."

Summary: After her boyfriend cheats on her Fred and George help reader get revenge

A/n: I am so sorry this is so late. My summer has been shit, my bestfriend started dating the guy I have liked for over a year, and my other friend is pissed at me rn sooo yeah life is great. Anyway, sorry again and I'll try to catch up on some writing. Hope u guys enjoy!

You woke up to a blinding light turning your eyelids from a dark peaceful space to a bloody red one. You groaned opening them slowly and painfully squinting against the sunlight filtering through the large windows in the common room. 

Groaning in confusion you began to gain your senses back, along with memories from the night before. You remembered winning the quidditch game by barely a second then the raging party afterwards, and the number of shots you had taken quickly and painlessly to celebrate your win. 

And now you were tangled in limbs with someone on a couch not daring to move because of the pounding in your head that felt like someone was hitting it with a hammer every other second.

Finally the sting slowed to a dull throb and you sat up trying to ignore the intensifying pain once again rising in your head. You looked around to find your legs wrapped around your best friend's. Your head had been in the crook of his arm and you had to push his other arm off your shoulder. 

You slid your legs off of Fred and stood up causing the red headed boy to stir but not wake. You then began to take in your soundings. 

The floor was littered with red plastic cups and garbage. There was red and gold confetti everywhere and red streamers across the balcony above. 

You sighed and headed up to your dorm pressing in on your temples. You quickly got changed at went down to the common room. You and Cormac were supposed to meet up for breakfast -you had agreed to do so before the match- but now he was probably passed out and hungover. 

You sighed and decided to go check. If he was asleep you would just wake up Fred to go with you. 

You headed up the stairs your headache fading away thanks to the healing potion you had downed upstairs.

You pushed open the door and was met with two pairs of eyes. One was the hazel of your boyfriend and the others were the deep brown of Katie Bell. 

You stumbled backwards at the sight in front of you. Your eyes became blurry with tears. Why was Katie here? Why was she half naked? And why was SHE ON TOP OF YOUR BOYFRIEND?!

"You asshole!" You spat out tears streaming down your cheeks. 

Cormac pushed Katie off of him and started towards you. 

"Shit y/n, I-I didn't mean for you to see that." 

"No shit." You gritted out fury and sadness budding inside you.

He tried to step towards you but you took a step back, "Y/n I-"

"Eight months," you scoffed the comfort you had seen in his eyes gone. "Eight fucking months!"

He flinched at your words as if each one was a slap to the face. 

"You threw away eight months to fuck a slut like Katie Bell?!" You screeched not caring that you had just woken a dozen hungover teenagers.

"Hey!" Katie yelled clearly offended. 

You turned to her with fury in your eyes that made her cower, "You don't get to speak."  You hissed. Katie shut her lips tight and retreated into the corner.

"Don't take this out on her." Cormac said.

"You're defending her!" Your words were sharp and haunted. 

"Your one to talk of being a slut when your sleeping with Weasley!" 

You let out a sour laugh, "Who? Fred?" 

"Yeah Fred, you're all over him!" 

"You know what McLaggen?" You scoffed. "I should have been with Fred."

"Yeah, you think you should have been with him?!" Cormac yelled taking a step toward you, "Then go! Go fuck Weasley!"

You looked up at him tears leaving shimmering trails down your cheeks. Your eyes filled with a dark fire, "Go fuck yourself McLaggen." You seethed before turning on your heels and darting down the stairs. 

You were met with 11 pairs of eyes each showed emotions ranging from anger to pity. The latter more common than the former. 

"Shows over." You murmured angrily. 

Most eyes darted away from you and you scoffed before walking towards the portrait hole. You were stopped by a hand catching g your wrist. 

It was Fred, he tried to pull you into a hug while murmuring comforting words but you pulled away angrily. You left tears dripping from your chin as your crimson robes billowed behind you.

It had been a week. A week of the glances and the whispers. A week of the pitying looks and pointed fingers. A week of anger and sadness.

Fred watched you suffer for a week and he was done. He couldn't stand watching you fall apart over a boy who you should've been with in the first place. He tried to comfort you but his attempts failed each time. So he decided you needed the next best thing. 

Revenge.

Fred and George had a special talent when it came to revenge. So when they found you drunk and alone on the dock to the Black Lake, they decided to take action.

It took the twins two days to come up with the perfect prank. They wanted something that would humiliate him to no end but not physically hurt him. 

Well, George to remind Fred of the last part more often than not when the older twin came up with ideas that could seriously injure their target. 

Finally they struck gold on a plan. 

You sat in the library trying to focus on your potions essay instead of the group of fourth years that were giggling behind their hands pointing at you every so often. You finally snapped whipping around to face the group. 

"You point at me one more time and I will cut that finger off." You threatened your voice low and menacing. 

The younger students flashed red, eyes widened before mumbling an apology and quickly exiting the library. 

"Well you scared the shit out of them." George laughed taking a seat next to you and snatching the quill from your hand. 

You sighed, "What do you what Weasley?"  

"This is about what you want, what you need." Fred stated sliding on your other side and throwing his arm around your shoulders. 

"What's that?" You grumbled visibly annoyed. 

"Revenge." Both twins voiced at the same time smirks taking over their pink lips. 

And for the first time in weeks you felt a smile across your lips, "Alright, what are we talking?" 

You stood in front of the portrait entrance watching as the twins set up the trip wire. 

You giggled, "This is illegal isn't it?" 

"Nah," Fred smiled back at you he had missed the sound of your laughter. 

"It does break about 30 different school rules though." George shrugged. 

"Good." You grinned flashing your white teeth. "That means it's going to be brilliant."

"That also means we need a getaway plan." Fred pointed out, sighing and backing away from his masterpiece. 

"We could make a run for the closet in the charms room." You suggested. 

"Good idea but all three of us won't fit." George explained. 

"Okay, we'll go there and you make a run for the astronomy tower." Fred offered smirking at his astounded brother. 

"What! Why do you get to go to the easy spot?" Goerge asked visibly annoyed. 

"Because I called it." Fred replied, clearly proud of himself.

"The only reason you want to hide in a closet with y/n is because-" George was cut by a particularly cold glare from his twin.

"Because what?" You asked looking back and forth from the boys. 

"Nothing." Goerge grumbled rolling his eyes.

You mimicked his actions and sighed, you weren't going to get an answer out of the two any time soon. 

"Ok so y/n your going to lead him out then we will let the magic happen. " Fred grind.

"This better work." You mumbled. 

"It'll work." George asherrd you. 

"Hey McLaggen, I want to talk to you." When those words left your mouth everyone in the common room snapped their attention to you, as usual they had nothing else to do but wait around like vaulters for something interesting to happen.

Cormac smirked looking up at you, "Alright sweetheart."

You almost slapped him, you managed to take a deep breath and force a smile on your face as you walked towards the exit with him. 

Just before you exited the portrait hole you looked straight up at him and punched him square in the jaw. Your fist connected with his face and he stumbled backwards clutching the spot where he had just been hit. 

Gasps were heard from behind you as some people stood up to get a better view of the scene unfolding in front of them.

"You bitch!" He shrieked, " Your gonna rot in Hell. Rot!" 

You sprinted away from him as he started after you. You were sure to step over the tripwire as you darted out of the way. 

You turned just as he tripped over the thin wire sprawling to the ground. 

"I will face god as I walk backward into hell!"  You yelled at him flipping him off as you walked backwards. 

You watched with a satisfied smile as the boy who had caused you so much pain was dumped in black ink. 

The second the rotten smelling ink covered him George cast a Bedazzling hex and seconds afterwards Fred cast a bat bogey hex and an Antler jinx. 

You burst into laughter watching as the boy stumbled around blindly covered in vomit scented ink growing antlers as his own mucus grew wings and attacked his face. 

"Come on y/n!" Fred yelled snatching your hand and darting towards the East wing. 

The two of you burst into the Charms classroom and darted for the closet. Fred shoved you inside before following and slamming the door behind him. 

You were still laughing the hilarious image of your ex-boyfriend dancing in your mind. 

Fred was smiling too, how could he not be happy when the sound of your laughter filled his ears? 

The two of you stood in the dark closet chests brushing for 4 minutes before your laughter died out, well was more cut off.

Fred heard voices and promptly slapped his hand over your mouth. Your laughter had still been to loud and as much as you tried to stop it you couldn't. So you did the next best thing. You buried your head deep into Fred's chest to muffle the sound. 

Fred had never been more thankful for the dark. He swore he was on fire when you had nuzzled into his sweatshirt, wrapping your arms around him. 

When you laughter finally did die you just stood there buried deep into his chest, hugging him tightly as you breathed in his sweet scent. 

"Thank you." You mumbled, voice barely audible.

"For what?" Fred asked face still hot. 

"For everything." You murmured, tried to snuggled deeper into Fred's soft sweatshirt. "You've done so much for me." 

"Y/n I would do anything for you." The red headed boy whispered wrapping his arms around you and burying his head into your y/h/c hair inhaling its signature floral scent. The scent he would recognize anywhere. "I love you y/n." 

The words tumbled from his lips before he could stop them. His eyes went wide as you pulled away from him in shock. 

You felt your breath speed up, "What!?" You cried attempting to back up only to hit a shelf directly behind you. 

Fred felt like his whole world just came crashing down on him. He stumbled over his words trying to recover only to realize there was no going back. 

"You love me?" You asked eyes wide, eyebrows knitted together as confusions etched itself onto your face. 

Fred sighed looking helplessly down at his hands. He finally looked back up at you and exhaled loudly. "Yes." 

You stumbled falling against the wall coving your face with your hands. This was too much too soon. Your boyfriend cheats on you and your best friend says he loves you all in one week. This was way too much. 

"Look y/n I'm really sorry to spring this on you but it's about time I tell you I've loved you for 4 years." Fred declared. 

"FOUR YEARS?" You gasped mouth dropping open, eyed the size of golf balls as you ran your hand through your hair. 

"Yeah but it's all your fault." Fred snapped suddenly feeling angry at the girl for putting him through years of unrequited love.

"My fault!?" You yelled anger conquering your features. 

"Yeah!" Fred scoffed, "Your the one who had to be all pretty and smart. It's not my fault your perfect! Your the one who made me fall in love with you!" 

"What could I have possibly done to make you fall in love with me?!"

Fred's mouth now dropped, "Are you kidding?" He scoffed. 

"Do I look like I'm kidding?!" You asked impatiently. 

"What made me fall in love with you? Well let's see, how about the fact that you stand up for yourself no matter what, or the fact that you are smarter than the rest of the kids in our year combined. Or maybe that you make the best jokes and you are clever and witty in the best possible way. Or the fact that you are so stupidly beautiful I can't even look at you without imagining what it would be like to run my hands over your-!" 

His ranting was cut off when your reached up and grabbed his tie, roughly slamming your lips onto his.

His eyes widened in surprise before shutting slowly as he leaned into the kiss. 

One of your hands found their way to the back of his neck while your other ran through his fiery red hair, tugging lightly making him moan. When his lips parted you slipped your tongue inside them tasting butterbeer and chocolate, rich and sweet. 

His hands found your waist and pulled you close for a second until you pulled away. 

The two of you stood in the dark panting for a few seconds before Fred spoke. 

"Why did you do that?" He gasped eyes wide from surprise. 

"I don't know!" You yelled, "I just really wanted to kiss you all of the sudden!" 

"Well it was good." Fred replied 

"Yeah it was." You breathed out. 

Another few seconds of silence past. 

"Can I do it again?" Fred asked hope inlayed into each word.

"Yeah." You nodded before your lips were connected.

The ginger pushed you against the wall kissing you desperately, his tongue running over your lips before you opened them, pulling him impossibly closer to you by the neck. He started to unbutton  your shirt when you were unfortunately interrupted. 

Light flooded the closet and you both turned to see a disgusted twin. 

"I'm proud of you Fred, but stop before I puke." George grimaced. 

"Sorry." You mumbled pulling away from the boy and straightening your shirt. 

George began to walk away mumbling "The coast is clear." 

Fred brushed past you to follow him but before he could pass you grabbed his hand turning him towards you. 

"Hey Fred?" You asked 

"Yeah?"

"I think I love you too."

Masterlist

[toutallyahoe]

crowley fucking up baking with his s/o and trying to fight the flour (he gives me these kinda vibes)

I was planning a one shot with aziraphale with this one kind of idea but oh well

Crowley would definitely fuck shit up. He a damn demon damn it

This is giving me life asdfghjkkl and i have been dead inside for yearsss

⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃

[Name] had to beg Crowley to help him bake

like, really beg so bloody much

Crowley was so against the idea because: 1, he can just miracle away some bloody cake and it would be the delicious cake his [Name] had ever taste. 2, Crowley doesn't eat! Maybe [Name] asling Aziraphale would be much better. And 3, CROWLEY CANT BAKE [NAME]

Crowley told those reasons

maybe vaguely because he wont admit shit

but [Name] was very determined

the [Hair color] haired human had to make a deal with Crowley

... pfft-- reminds me of these supernatural fanfics I stumbled on

but anyways, back to the good omens and shit

[Name] may or may not promised Crowley some nice cuddling sessions

and maybe a good fuck

who knows

but just know that [Name] in the end had Crowley in the kitchen

not wearing an apron because the snake demon thought he wont fuck himself up

he did

like, the baking started

[Name] was about to put the needed materials on the counter but Crowley miracled them

"I'm making your life easy [Name]"

[Name] although happy to not get THAT much work, the human is still disappointed

"No miracling from this point!"

Crowley was against it because he planned to miracle every. single. task. [Name]. will. give. him

but Crowley wasn't THAT lazy though

it's just because he has no fucking clue what to do

"But--"

"No buts!"

Crowley, although tried his best, fucked up

[Name] had to stop making the filling for the cake because Crowley cant do crap with the batter

Crowley though [Name] would give up in his fucked ups

but NOPE

his [Name] JUST HAD TO BE THIS SWEET AND PATIENT ASSHOLE

so, the icing can wait

[Name] stayed by Crowley side as he helped and gave of instructions for Crowley not to mess up

after awhile, the snake demon kinda enjoyed himself

Crowley was actually good at it

baking I mean

baking manually

after a few minutes of stirring the batter with [Name] nodding and smiling to him

then leaving for a bit as he said he was about to get ready the oven

but as the human went, Crowley still saw that loving smile

it made Crowley happy to see the human actually be this happy

Crowley didnt know why [Name] was really adamant on him trying to bake with [Name] as the human can just Aziraphale and pretty sure the angel will agree wholeheartedly

but nevertheless, it made Crowley happy

lost in his sappy moment

Crowley managed to tilt the bowl where the batter he was stirring

BAM

"ARE YOU BLOODY SERIOUS?!?"

"CROWLEY ARE YOU ALRIGHT?!?"

you can guess who said who

but Crowley did managed to make the bowl of batter fall to the floor

Crowley was seething and embarrassed

for Hell's sake! can the Almighty stop making him embarrassed himself?!?

the answer to that is nah

[Name] just sighs and gently placed a hand on Crowley's shoulders

"Let's make it again, alright?"

Crowley swore if he wasnt a demon that could sense any supernatural beings, he would thought [Name] as an angel

a fucking angel that he was blessed to have as his

[Name] was back in Crowley's side and helped out again

but this time he was behind Crowley

so close and had help the demon's arm as he murmured the instruction again on to Crowley's ear

the demon's face could fight the color of his own hair from how red he was

oh my-- [Name] can you STOP BEING SWEET AND PATIENT AND ALSO BLOODY HOT SO CROWLEY COULD FOCUS?!?

[Name] was very distracting with how very close he was with the demon

so, the making of the batter was a breeze

its probably because Crowley was having a meltdown on the inside on how close [Name] and his mind just shut down and did what [Name] ordered

[Name] had noticed Crowley's unresponsive behavior and when he backed away and stood beside the demon, he just saw Crowley blankly look at the batter

like, [Name] is confused

Crowley was talking or saying anything

so, [Name], not knowing what to do and just wanting to erase that dumb look on Crowley's face kissed the demon on the check

Crowley snapped out of his stupor and processed what [Name]

face red again as the demon was sputtering incoherent sentences whille backing awhile from [Name] a bit

CROWLEY IS SENSITIVE TO AFFECTION

smol headcanon to throw btw, heaven is touch starved while hell is affection starve. you cant change my mind

okay, back to Crowley and fucking up baking

as the demon backed away

Crowley mights have wished he cleaned the floor with the messed he had made awhile ago

because he slipped

fucking slipped

"FUCKING HELL!"

THUD

who knew flour can be slippery?

Crowley did and he is both angry and embarrassed again

the Almighty is laughing her butt off on this if she's watching

she is

but back to the two

"SSSERIOUSLY?!?"

Crowley hissing at his sentences when his mad

[Name] dont know what to do

laugh or assist?

he is still human after all and he just loved how Crowley looked so fucking cute then slipping

slipping guys

why was Crowley so fucking adorable???

but Crowley was not finding the situation this humorous or adorable

in a fit of rage, he stood up and began to curse the flour on the floor

kicking and making it fly to the air

"THISSS WHEAT LITTLE THING ISSS MAKING ME FURIOUSSS!!!"

Crowley was so ready to fight a flour

a fucking flour

[Name] had to restrain him by garbbing both of his arm, pull him close jnto a hug and mutter how great he was

Crowley sighed in content

his rage slowly diminishing beacuse [Name] was just this angel of a human being to deal with his tantrum and what knot

after awhile, [Name] and Crowley continued baking

Crowley was so fucking done but when [Name] offered that he could just leave the baking to him and he sit on the livingroom couch to wait

Crowley was also against it

he may have fucked up a bit (a lot) but he didnt want to leave [Name] to do anything alone

especially this baking where he kinda fears [Name] would hurt himself in the making

so they baked

[Name] was so patient with Crowley

and the demon was so thankful for that

because he messed up more in the process of making

but in the end they did it!

Crowley actually enjoyed decorating the cake

he and [Name] had made the filling and icing while the cale was cooking in the oven

the cake almost got burned

it did but Crowley sneakily miracled it perfectly when [Name] wasnt looking because HE WANTS [NAME] TO BE HAPPY WITH THIS DAMN THING

but anyways

type cake is finished!

its decorated and have the fillings in the middle

[Name] ate a piece and had urge Crowley to taste

the demon was against it but [Name] managed to have him take a bite

it was alright

maybe not like the cakes Aziraphale and [Name] ate but it was alright

Crowley promised he'll never do this ever again

[Name] still got him to do this again

[pumpkin-lith]

Clone Wars Saved...ish

What the hell did I just watch ?

Let’s start by saying that 1) spoilers alert, not necessarily coherent but definitely there, I’ll put on a read more, but unspoiled mobile users, just in case it fails, scroll by and 2) @norcumii had warned me. And yet I didn’t quite expect that because, how could more clones ever be bad !

Oh boy.

Thanks to @shadow-spires for being my emotional support watchbuddy. I needed it more than I thought I would and we’re only three episodes in.

Some context : I’ve watched... only a few episodes of the show before, despite probably being able to give you the plot of all 6 seasons and quote lines and scenes, thanks tumblr and my own love for clones. And I hadn’t really looked at the bad batch half-rendered episodes because I still had trouble with the graphics of the actually finished show, so...

But I was ready for this, for feels, for finding Echo again and, finally, get 66 and murdered by Dave Filoni. Set up a meeting time to watch some eps with shadowspires, fun when there is a twelve hours diff between us and here we go.

Let me tell you, there was a lot of yelling in all caps in the chat side bar...

Trying to keep mostly in order of the episodes :

- WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO KIX’S HAIR ? Why ? Why hair and no more tattoo ??? Is this supposed to be red corsair continuity ? But then WHY IS HE HERE AND NOT ALREADY ABDUCTED ? Is this merch reasons ?

- Two seconds in and WOW I hate the Bad Batch. And this does NOT get better. I’m really tired of the Muscle is Dumb trope, Tech is like a human C3PO which urgh but fine but then KEEP CONSTANT (this is going to be a major point of my yelling), if Hunter says you chatter all the time THEN DO but no, we won’t here a single random fact ever again for three episodes, and Crosshairs chats and snarks a LOT for someone ‘not talkative’. 

- Regs. FUCKING REGS, urgh, I hated that word the INSTANT it was said. Canon isn’t as heavily into the Vode An fanon loves, but WOW fuck that. Strike team or not, you’re not supermen, you have to rely on intel, be supplied, you’re not a bunch of mercenaries, you’re a MILITARY STRIKE TEAM, you must interact with regs a lot so it means you’re a bunch of condescending assholes ALL THE TIME.

-Also fuck 1) that team’s dynamics and 2) the “two teams do not get along” trope, fuck it with a SHOVEL.  1) You’re a Commando Team. In an army three years deep into war. You’re comrades and probably have save each other asses hundred of times. So why can’t you behave ? And I know people do not always get along, or even best friends sometimes irk each other, but, look, consistency, if you think you’re with lesser people because regs (can you tell I’m not over that either), you present a united front and you don’t bitch at your teammates in front of them. 2) YOU ARE MILITARY. Trained for 10+ years, there’s DISCIPLINE there, even a maverick strike team, when Cody is down, you OBEY THE SECOND IN COMMAND. I don’t care if you have a better plan, you TELL the officer, you don’t just tell him to shut up and watch. AND YOU DON’T GET AT EACH OTHER’S THROATS.

-Did I mention I hate everything about Dumb Violent Muscles unable to control himself or follow a plan ?

-Of course the one time we could see Cody in charge, he’s hurt and useless.

-WHY. IS. THE MEDIC. GOSSIPING. INSTEAD OF KEEPING WATCH OVER THE WOUNDED BROTHER ???

AND WHY DOES HE HAVE HAIR DAMMIT

-The tactics Mess out of order :  Why is nobody blowing stuff up, a group able to single handedly take on 100+ droids is getting pushed back by thirty later on, why not trap the outpost to blow up the incoming droids, the analytical droid cannot comprehend why the clones would leave the outpost while in full view of the cyber center and it has to be pointed out to him, WHY DID NOBODY TRAP THE FUCKING OUTPOST TO BLOW, why does the tech guy LITERALLY NAMED TECH doesn’t hide/erase what they did to the computer, why if he didn’t have time DIDN’T HE BLOW UP THE COMPUTER. 

-And for a plot point being “droids analyzes our tactics so we always have to change them”, it means that no one ever attacked a front door and drew all the droids there for a second team to sneak by the back door. Somehow.

Ep2 & 3 :

- Why is “this may or may not be Echo” matters on a tactical PoV ? I get the emotional one, of course, but having the Bad Batch question it at the beginning and later on starting a fight over it has no other reason than to go for another round of We Do Not Get Along Trope. The Seps have either a PoW or an Algorhythm allowing them to win battle, no matter what it is, you have to go and rescue/take it. WHY ARE YOU ARGUING.

- I know this is the funny part of ‘Anakin and Padmé are the less subtle ever’ and it was funny (I didn’t hate ALL of the episodes, see ?), but why is she explaining to Anakin why he fights three years into the war other than reminding the public, this is the LEAST EFFECTIVE PLAN ever to hide from Obi-Wan with Rex obviously standing guard.

-Not a critic, just fucking amused : if someone isn’t aware that Padmé and Anakin are a thing, there is a lot of subtext to thing Anakin and Rex have a hidden fling. I don’t even ship it and I could see it x)

- Tell Padmé I say hello. TELL PADME I SAY HELLO. Obi-Wan fucking KNOWS, maybe not the whole “married and pregnant” but hellooooo that was blantant cue that he’s aware they’re together, at the very least so very close friends that they sneak private calls during a siege if Anakin is really dense, we have ONSCREEN PROOF that Obi-Wan SAID OUT LOUD something about it and it makes Anakin thinking Obi-Wan doesn’t know and couldn’t understand in RotS even STUPIDER. Good job Anakin.

- This Galaxy has the most efficient Google Translate ever. Either it’s a known language of the planet you’re going to, and then by doing research amidst the prep to go to the planet everyone or at least Rex as Captain would put the translator to the spoken languages there on his helmet, or it’s an unknown one and yet with two sentences, Tech’s tech (urgh) is able to translate and analyses it well enough to speak it back to them. Wow. 

- WHY. IS. THE. JEDI. NOT. USING. THE. FORCE. You’ve worked with Echo before but there’s no mention or even trying to feel him, fine, better have another fight of whether or not he’s truly here, two droids manage to get the drop on you, two droids manage to get the drop on you AND SOMEHOW AREN’T IMMEDIATELY BISECTED, Two droids manage to get the drop on you, survive, AND GIVE YOU ENOUGH TROUBLE YOU NEED SOMEONE TO SHOOT ONE TO GET OUT OF IT. 

- Echo, my poor baby TnT I knew this was going to hurt, and it does, it does so much. 

-And we’re RIGHT BACK to full on rage rather fast. We go from “he’s so weak he can’t walk, he doesn’t remember anything after the Citadel, he’s so out of it he doesn’t know where he is and ‘notices’ Rex being here two or three times” to “He can walk, he can be yeeted into a vent, he can tightpole walk, he can shoot while standing, he knows the whole base’s blueprints and also all the Separatist’s database.” in like. Five minutes. CONSITENCY FOR FUCK’S SAKE. Why is no one carrying him, why don’t we even get a fucking HUG ?

-Why was everyone yeeted by Dumb Muscles WHEN WE HAVE A JEDI HERE. WHY STILL NO FORCE ??? Clone-yeeting is like Anakin’s favorite pastime, he should have thought of it FIRST, My Moment Has Come.

- Oh FUCK NO. WHY did you even GO BACK TO THE NATIVES’ VILLAGE ? You got dragons, you fly back to your ship that wasn’t damaged in anyway, you evac fast and clean, DONE ! Why go back ? Anakin even says that the Techno Union will strike for helping them BUT UNTIL YOU WENT BACK THEY DIDN’T KNOW THE NATIVES HELPED YOU ! They had no problems until now ! DON’T INVOLVE CIVILIANS ! If they had gone with the plot point of having the natives pick a side and be the ones to save them from that pole by flying to get them, then yes, totally, stay and help and defend them against the retaliation massacre ! But since they didin’t, do NOT go there and draw to them a retaliation massacre.

-FUCK that speech. Sorry Rex, but FUCK THAT. Again, civilians. You are supposed to be the GOOD GUYS trying to STOP THE WAR, not draw innocents into it when it could be avoided. AND THEN LEAVE WHEN YOU JUST TOOK DOWN ONE ATTACK AND THE TECHNO UNION WILL SURELY COME WIPE OUT THAT VILLAGE FOR HELPING YOU AND THERE’LL BE NO JEDI TO SAVE THE DAY.

-Why is everyone suddenly dumb.

-Fuck that “good old days” bullshit. I’m sure there were good times, but your good old days are three years of war and losses. Gimme “now everything will be alright”, because for once someone survived, for once the future is looking hopeful, give me them hoping that it’ll be okay and then gut me with the sheer irony of it all because I know 66 is looming. AND FUCKING HUG HIM DAMMIT, he was almost catatonic thirty minutes ago, at least HELP HIM into the ship rather than leave him standing here alone.

-And no mention of Fives, of course. Idk it may be in episode 4, it BETTER be in Episode 4, otherwise this is “it be like the good old days, yay, btw Fives’ dead”.

I am SO ready for the damn Bad Batch arc to be over and hoping the actual original content is way better. I wished they had scrapped that disaster of an idea full of bad clichés. You want a strike team to go with Rex ? I’ve got a strike team for you : Jesse is an ARC, Kix is both a medic and seen many times with a rifle (AND THE COOLEST HAIRCUT, get us Bly there and give him a tracking speciality with the many ‘primitive’ planets he was on, and we have Aayla for the muscle. That would be badass.

[movienotesbyzawmer]

October 23: Friday The 13th - A New Beginning

(previous notes: Friday the 13th - The Final Chapter)

In case you're just joining us, I have committed myself to the task of watching each of the eight Friday the 13th movies that came out in the 80s, taking notes as I watch them, then posting those notes. I'm about to watch the fifth movie.

And hey, is it time to just recap the "story" so far? I mean… sure, I guess. It all started in 1958, when a little boy named Jason drowned at Camp Crystal Lake. Supposedly the camp counselors responsible for keeping an eye on him were distracted with their recreational boinking. That's how the story goes… however, what we see in 1958 is two camp counselors boinking and then getting murdered by someone with ostensibly no related drowning event. Anyway, Twenty years later Jason's mom stalks some camp counselors that are at that camp and kills them very violently. She gets beheaded before she can kill the last counselor, but then that counselor gets pulled into the water by ghoulboy Jason; she survives this only to be murdered by him in her house at a later date.

Meanwhile another facility down the shore from Camp Crystal Lake (and I might add that the actual eponymous lake doesn't appear to be any bigger than the apparel section of a Target) has some new counselor trainees on a retreat of some kind. Jason has quickly matured from a swampy child-monster to a hooded, but otherwise sharply-dressed psychopath who doesn't say anything. He kills everyone at this retreat except for one girl who seems to kind of get him. Also maybe her boyfriend survives, we never really get an answer on that, but she is familiarly hauled away by an ambulance and forgotten about. Jason keeps his killing spree going quite indiscriminately, but focusing on another group of young people that are hanging out at a nearby ranch. He kills everyone there, plus some other people he found, except for one girl who survives long enough to get pulled into the water by a ghoul that is probably a Jason's Mom Thing. We don't know what happens to her, but she definitely did not stay dry.

The hospital where that last batch of victims ended up got a little bit murdered up. Jason was in there because he was thought of as one of the victims somehow, maybe a deliberate playing-dead trick because he does like to do stuff like that. He heads back to the woodsy area around Crystal Lake and decides to pick on the residents of two area houses. He does lots of killings but a brother and sister from one of those houses stab him so many times that he just can't get up an murder them. But in the process of that, the brother might have caught some evil. Is this the final chapter. Will there be a new beginning. Soon the contents of Disc 5 will reveal all.

(I have not seen this movie btw)

It opens very differently from the others… someone on a raincoat is walking urgently through the woods during a nighttime storm. It's Corey Feldman! He approaches Jason's grave in the woods! Like totally a grave with a headstone that says Jason Voorhees. But also two hooligans were on their way to that grave; they want to dig Jason up! CF is hiding and watching that; the hooligans don't know about him. They want to see Jason's body, and when they succeed with that, it stabs them to death because Jason was buried with a bunch of his favorite weapons. Plus also wearing the hockey mask. He's about to kill CF when whoever was dreaming this dream wakes up in a van that appears to be for crazy people of some kind. I don't recognize anyone, but maybe the dreaming person is grown-up CF? Probably that. Not played by CF, though.

His name is Tommy. I think that was CF's character's name so yeah it's him. I wonder if he's still into video games. He's being delivered to an institute of mental health. A nice couple is in charge, a Nice Woman and a Nice Man who make it sound like it will be Nice there.

Tommy looks wistfully at a picture of his mom and sister. The sister survived the last movie ostensibly so what is the deal with her.

Reggie the Reckless is a character that introduces himself to Tommy quite confrontationally. He is only about 11 and he likes to scare people; he clearly thinks he's going to totally pwn Tommy with pranks, but Tommy is apparently still into monster masks so he responds in a horror-mask way that earns some cred with Reggie the Reckless.

We get a glimpse at the motley cast of teens and young adults that populates this youth mental facility slash work farm place… and then two old killjoys show up to scold everyone for being crazy. These two killjoy characters are the most broadly performed caricatures we've seen since the "you're all doomed" old guy. Their acting is the kind of acting you see at the Renaissance festival, except without the half-assed English accents.

One of the kids at the institute is just a well-meaning dork with chocolate smears on his face that everyone hates… one guy hates him so much that he murders him! With an axe! Chocolate Smear was trying to strike up a conversation with a man who was angrily chopping wood, and bothered him so much that he axes him right there in front of others and in broad daylight! This story I tell you, it is a veritable New Beginning.

New characters. Leather Jacket Assholes, are talking about the murder at the nuthouse. They are in the woods nearby and one of them goes to take a leak while the other tries to fix something wrong with the car. They both get some kind of killed! The first one, the killer shoves a lit flare in his mouth, and the other one gets his throat slashed while he's acting very cocky and charismatic in the front seat of the car. Lit flare death is better even though it looks very fake.

But now we're back at the workhouse institute place and they're all mournful because of that odd and traumatic axe murder. Someone tries to be playfully scary with a monster mask and Tommy flips out and beats him up! This is a drama about the dysfunctional relationships between the involuntary residents of a workhouse.

Ugh, now we're back on the Killjoy characters. They are extremely unpleasant to behold. I hope Jason really is still killing people and that he takes care of those two irritants.

New characters, a waitress at a café and a hot doggin' yuppie in a muscle car trying to impress her, It seems like it's always important in these movies to have loud asshole characters, but there are really a lot of them in this one. If it's because they think we want to see assholes get killed… they have a point.

Hot Dog was doing some coke lines in his car waiting for the waitress when he very abruptly, but not unpredictably got axed right in his bald spot! Then the waitress comes out to find him and gets axed in the sternum. Those two, and the leather jacket dudes, don't have any ostensible relationship to the workhouse kids, although the leather dudes mentioned hearing about the murder there. Are we supposed to suspect that Jason is following Tommy and killing randos in the area surrounding where he is?

So there's this couple, a frisky, playful couple that are, I think, residents at the mental health facility, but they smolder with the carefree lust of what can only be described as camp counselors. They sneak off into the woods to get naked and fool around! An old man is watching them! The old man gets knifed in the gut! Then the girl of the couple gets sheared to death while the guy is taking a break somewhere. But he returns to find what happened to her - we see that he sheared her right in the eyes, it's gross! Then he gets a very good death; the killer secures him to a tree with a leather strap, which he tightens and tightens and tightens with his makeshift branch-crank until his skull is crushed! This consistent ingenuity of homicide methodology can only come from the one, the only, the master, Jason Voorhees.

New character alert… I kind of like this part! So Reggie the Reckless is given a ride to visit his big brother at the trailer park where he lives. Reggie and Big Brother are really happy to see each other! They get along very, very well! Big Brother even offers Reggie an enchilada! We don't see the enchilada! They're in a van, not even a trailer, and the dialogue plainly tells us that Big Brother has an enchilada next to him that he makes available to Reggie! Reggie does not accept the proffered enchilada! It is funny that we do not see what the enchilada looks like! What does an enchilada in a van look like!

Meanwhile Tommy gets into big trouble because someone nearby with this movie's requisite asshole level notices him waiting around near the trailer park, and correctly surmises that he is from the nearby mental health facility. This asshole starts a fight and Tommy has incredible martial arts skills so he beats up the asshole. Why does he have those skills.

Big Brother had to go to the outhouse immediately for enchilada-related reasons after Reggie left. He and his girlfriend have a cute exchange while he's in there, and just when I think that I like it when this movie's assholes die and plus I also like Big Brother, he and the girlfriend get killed. Big Brother gets perforated with metal spikes that are shoved at him through the walls of the outhouse. I am disappoint. This is probably this series' version of the first ten minutes of Up.

Oh, so the Killjoy characters… one of them was the guy that Tommy beat up, and the other one is his mom. Yeah, they hate the mental health facility, so it make some sense that he would pick a fight with Tommy so rashly. He returns home on his motorcycle but he's so mad about getting beat up that he just rides around outside his house, raging loudly about getting thumped and demanding that his mom do something about it! But he gets beheaded by a knife that takes advantage of his perpetual motorcycle operation. Then a butcher knife comes through the window at his mom and she's dead, face down in some soup cauldron she'd been obsessing over.

A word about the character with the speech impediment. One of the workhouse kids stutters. Inclusion! He just had some awkward interactions with the couple of ladies in the house and then turned around and saw a raised butcher knife. No more stuttering guy.

I should mention, the glimpses we've gotten of the killer are very, very unrevealing. The movie is making sure we don't have enough information to conclude for sure that it is Jason, although sometimes Tommy has visions of Jason standing somewhere and looking at him.

Another character died that's in that house. A girl gets naked and goes to bed, sees the body of the stuttering guy that has been placed there to frighten her, and then gets macheted through the mattress.

Then another killing. This character who has been vividly characterized throughout as "girl who is only always ever listening to music that she is clearly super into so much that no one is able to talk to her", she's being like that in her room and the killer just goes in and stabs her in the gut.

Reggie and the Nice Woman find those last three bodies stacked on a bed, and they run away, but on their way out of the house, Jason, total actual Jason, bursts through a door at them! He has great posture and wears a clean jumpsuit. They run away into the nearby woods and see an old-fashioned station-wagon ambulance. They open a door of it and a body is in it! I don't recognize the victim but there have been a lot lately. But also look.. Jason! Nearby! They run away.

The two get separated and Nice Woman comes upon Nice Man spiked through the head into a tree, so very dead! I don't remember what we last saw of him.

She runs back to the main house, and the cook, who is Reggie's grandfather, is thrown through the window at her! He has been murdered! Murdered I tell you! She runs away.

Jason is slowly chasing her with his machete as she stumbles through the mud. He is about to kill her but then he is distracted by a tractor coming at him, operated by Reggie! Reggie actually runs him down with the tractor! It's actually a bulldozer. He bulldozed Jason!

He looks dead but then he grabs her leg. And then they run away.

A very exciting confrontation ensues in the nearby barn where they run. Jason slowly pursues them in there, and the woman comes at him with a chainsaw. They sort of swordfight but with chainsaw and machete.

Tommy, who has been we-don't-know-where, arrives and the dynamic changes because of the strange connection Jason and Tommy have. Or at least Tommy thinks they have a connection… Jason just walks up to him and slashes him with the machete.

Everyone moves up to the loft of the barn. Tommy looks very badly laid out, so between Reggie and the woman a big struggle happens. But it ends with Jason getting his hand chopped off by Tommy, and Jason falling onto the ground which has this odd grid of metal spikes that kill him just fine.

But! The mask comes off, and it isn't Jason! Isn't Jason at all! It's one of the men we've seen around, I forget who.

Oh, the next scene explains it all. It was "Roy". Roy was one of the cops, or paramedics (?), who responded to the weird axe murder of the Chocolate Smear kid. It turns out that he is the father of Chocolate Smear, and he did all the murders as a very unstable response to that. And The news clippings he was carrying out explain that he decided to make it look like a Jason murder spree.

The movie ends with Tommy having a dream about murdering the woman, waking up in a hospital room and having a Jason phantom vision, then looking at a hockey mask that is in a drawer of his hospital room's dresser! Then there is a quick final couple of shots that suggest that he has insanely put the hockey mask on and is gonna knife the woman when she enters the room to visit him. The credits roll as he's about to probably stab her.

So this was kind of hard to get through. I mean, they are all bad movies, and objectively it seems like number 4 was worse than this one. But I was less inclined than normal to fight through the disinterest. It's worth noting that they were clearly trying for some semblance of a "new beginning", and they even managed to make it that while also explaining how this is a continuation of the Jason story. And there was all the grisly death you could want, which is what we're here for in the first place. But none of the scares were good or memorable, and they're making no effort to one-up the earlier movies in terms of gore effects. And I really lost track of the characters. Except for the ones I hated.

(next: Friday the 13th Part VI - Jason Lives)

[praphit]

SM3: Nice Jerks are the Worst

I don't know about y'all, but I had big plans for 2020. Now, maybe those big plans will still happen, Idk. But, this was supposed to be our year! - that's what people say, right?? This was the year that you were going to go on that vacation. You were going to drop that dead beat spouse, leave that spouse with the kids, and run off to Mexico, right??!. You were going to start that business. Gain that weight. Come out of the closet. Finally tat that left butt cheek. You were going to stop doing hardcore drugs. Maybe this was going to be your year to start doing hardcore drugs. I'm not here to judge, only to ramble. 

But, 2020 quickly turned to shit. Now, we're all looking for someone to blame. Someone has to pay for our horrible haircuts or hairiness, our newfound hatred for our families, and for plenty of much more serious stuff.

I, personally, like to turn to movies for lessons about life. And I think I have the perfect movie to help us figure out who to blame - you guessed it "Spider-Man 3"

This first attempt at a motion picture SM was doing so well. We loved Spidey (though some didn't care for Tobey Maguire, playing him). 

Spidey and Mary Jane (Kirsten Dunst) are adorable. Then, this thing showed up and everything turned to shit (not unlike Covid-19).

Let's look into what went wrong, and who is to blame.

First, let me say that I really liked the action in this movie. There are three villains in this movie: Venom (played by Topher Grace), that thing you see above. 

Green Goblin (played by James Franco), who is... a green goblin. 

And Sandman (played by Tommy Church), who has a body  that is now kinda made of sand - which seems silly if you pick it a part... though so does a man with the powers of a spider.

There was lots of action, and it was all shot well. There is one action scene where there is NO ONE around... I mean NO ONE. It's frickin NY. Peter Parker (not dressed as Spider-Man) and Green Goblin are causing all kinds of damage and making a lot of noise, and not ONE new yorker has anything to say about it? Unless you're a healthcare worker, I bet new yorkers are still cursing at each other from their homes. This was glaring, but Imma let it slide, cuz the action was good.

That's about all of the good I have to report:)

Quick plot recap:

1) MJ and Petey are on the rocks 2) James Franco is an asshole, trying to destroy Peter for killing his father (which he didn't) 3) Venom is trying to kill Spidey (what else is new??) 4) Venom, at one point, infects Peter Parker, to become "Black Spidey" - this, of course, is also when the people of the city started to hate him.

5) Oh, and Peter, mm! He's the worst. I've got something for him later.

There are two major reasons why people talk shit about this movie.

1st - Casting/Characters

Nobody is likeable in this movie

From the very first scene, MJ is singing to us, annnnd it's sooooo boring. I don't think it was supposed to be. Someone in the audience should have been booing. We can’t just allow entertainers to get comfortable, thinking that they can do whatever the hell that they want! - that’s how you end up with stuff like this 

 It was like, if Snow White were to perform a number for a large crowd.

Just Snow White - I ain't talking about no cute animals around or the suspense of menacing dwarves that might turn on Snow White at any moment. Not even a prince who might be gay (that’s the word on the streets). Just a long movie filled with songs from Snow White; that's what we're talking about. First, MJ bores me, then she's pathetically whining throughout the whole movie.

Sandman is cool (despite his love for striped shirts), but we don't really get to know him. 

Side note: He gets his powers by accidentally getting trapped in a science experiment. The scientists, btw, ( And Lord knows what they were up to) knew that something could have been trapped in there, assumed it was a bird, and kept on going. See, this is why certain people don't trust y'all.

James Franco is James Franco (an asshole). Not worth a pic.

Venom doesn't really have a personality (and his host... well, he ain't no Tom Hardy)

PLUS, Peter Parker is a dick (again, we'll get to that later).

The most likeable person in this film is JJ Jameson, and we're not really supposed to like him.

A person with that look shouldn’t be your most likeable character.

Look at this stage - 

Who is likeable up here? Fauci, maybe? But, betting by the amount of times that he puts his hands to his face, 

- there are things he's not allowing himself to say, so though perhaps likeable, if we can fully trust him. And as far as Trump...  Even Trump supporters can't HONESTLY say that they LIKE the man (I mean, if he weren't the prez, would you honestly want him around? - your family?). They certainly can't say that they trust him - though I guess the amount of people looking into ingesting cleaning products after Trump mentioned something along those lines, would beg to differ.

This is the group we're looking to for direction?!

And this is also a problem in the movie. I have to be able to like SOMEBODY! 

I need to be able to trust someone to stop the cheesy-written shit storm that is this movie.

"Cheesy Shit Storm" - how bout that for a visual? :)

2nd - dance numbers!

I actually didn't mind the first one, when Peter is dancing through the streets.

Ha! Wow, he is going for it. Come get it while it’ s hot, ladies!

It's odd, but it's supposed to be. It's supposed to be funny, and it kinda is. You ever dance a lil bit while you're out at a store? I know I do; especially now that we're wearing pandemic masks - no one knows who I am. NBD to dance a bit in public, but if you keep going passed a certain point, it just becomes annoying.

That's why the second dance number is bad. Plus, it doesn't make any sense.

At this point MJ and Peter have broken up. She's singing in a bar, and Peter interrupts her song with a dance number (while using his new girlfriend to poke at MJ). Now, While MJ’s songs of boredom deserve interruption, she didn’t deserve that.

Venom is like a drug. Venom brings out the worst in a person. You're telling me that Peter Parker, with all of the rage built up from Uncle Ben and villains and his life not being all that great; the best or I should say "the worst" that he can do is Jazz hands? With all of his superpowers, he should be out there slaughtering everyone in sight. I mean, he did slap the shit out of MJ though (by "accident"). That's when he snapped out of the evil dance number. I don't know what kind of message that sends. 

"MJ, it wasn't until I slapped the holy hell out of you that I realized the error of my ways, so... thank you? I'm just going to go on about my day now."

I see this misguided scene as a metaphor. Peter Parker is dancing around his issues:

His relationship with MJ has been bad. He's on that stuff (Venom). And honestly, MJ knows that he's Spider-Man. Why couldn't he have just explained to her what was happening? 

"Sorry, baby. I got possessed by an alien again, you know how it is."

And he was dealing with the fact that the person who killed his uncle is on the loose. Another side note: MJ, even though they had just broken up, still cares for Peter while he's dealing with the news about Uncle Ben's killer. That's a damned good friend right there! - especially the way Peter had been acting towards her.

We've got to deal with stuff, people! We can't just get bad haircuts, wear weird clothes, and do drugs! Eventually, that will lead us to slapping the shit out of someone that we love. There are a lot of realities that we're prob not facing at the moment (and some we prob have no intentions of ever facing). A lot of things that we could have done to prevent certain things from escalating, but... we were busy doing our typical dance.

Peter was warned about Venom and did nothing about it. He told himself, "I got this", and clearly he didn't. Honestly, the whole city was screwing up by not helping Spider-Man at all. At the end, when the big fight is happening, and MJ is near death, everybody is just watching all of this go down. Where were the cops?! The S.W.A.T?! Other superheroes? New Yorkers themselves! - they're bold! But, to be fair, Venom came from outer space, so... it was a bit unprecedented; people were prob scared. I'll cut them and Spidey some slack.

You know who I won't cut any slack - Tobey Maguire's Peter Parker!

Peter Parker is a jerk. I'm thinking that Tobey's Peter Parker has always been a jerk; a nice jerk, but a jerk. Have you ever met a nice jerk? They do all of the things that a regualr jerk does, but they'll rationalize their behavior, and look puzzled when you react to their awfulness. I didn't notice this in the 1st movie, cuz I was just happy to get Spider-Man. I didn't notice in the 2nd movie, cuz those kids were just too darn cute. But, his niceness was so annoying in this movie. And he treated MJ horribly : He never listens to her, he’s always late, he only talks about himself, he’s too damned nice, he never knows when they’re in a fight, he kisses other women right in front of her and then is like “What did I do?”

I kept wanting her to punch Peter out; he would have deserved it.

The foundation of the character of the 1st Spider-Man was a problem from the start! If the foundation is shaky, then - whew! I'm glad that we finally fixed it:)

Plus, he never said he was sorry. He did one of those "Well, I'm not perfect." things. She ain't asking for perfection, just quit being a jerk!

A better movie would have been if MJ had been infected by Venom. For starters, she would have given a better performance, in the beginning. Something more like this - 

She would have banged Peter's friends. She would have destroyed her critics. And most importantly, she wouldn't have taken any shit from Peter. That could have been the main plot. Instead of a convultued blend of three villains around the nice jerkiness of Peter, it would have been Spider-Man vs MJ - beatening each other up all throughout the city; though I guess that would be considered domestic violence. But, why dance around real issues out there! 

It could have been a family-friendly movie about drug abuse (Venom) and domestic violence... and possibly some make-up sex in the middle of the city. But, after that, one of them, if not both, are going to jail! We gotta deal with the problems, people!

Grade: an entertaining D+ 

I did enjoy it. It wasn't as bad as I remember it, and I'd prob watch it again. But, I can't deny that on a technical level, it's crap.

"Who’s to blame?" isn't really the question. It's more "Who deserves what percentage of the blame?" There's a lot of blame to go around here... even to us who enabled Peter's jerkiness in the first two movies.

I like the direction that we're going in now. 

A better Spidey A better MJ Better villains

And even a better Aunt May 

- looking all good with Tony Stark.

- imagine Tony aggressively flirting with the older one

[ceies]

ASKELADD! And Thorfinn...

I went into this episode very pessimisticly. I thought with Askeladd injured, with Thorfinn gettig stronger (although still injured) with the season coming to a close. With Askeladd already struggling before against his own men (which I mean granted, a lot of men, but I always felt like Thorkell could have dealt with that situation and Thorfinn did do very well against Thorkell).... with all the stuff going on... I didn’t feel like Askeladd would necessarily die here before the finale even really started... but I thought maybe Knut would safe him... or maybe Thorfinn had an unexpected change of mind.

I did however expect a very good and exciting fight. I was super excited going into this episode. And then... I saw this face... and I reallized I might have miscalculatd. And so did Thorfinn.

I mean, last episode I saw this little flicker that the Anime always uses to show Askeladd angry or hyper focused... but I thought that was to make this fight more exciting... not so much to tell us that... Thorfinn is utterly screwed.

Because he was!

After Knut and Thorkell discussed about who would win, it was pretty obvious that this would go not just a little different, but way different than I expected... Like I can honestly say this is the first time that this show pulled a fast one on me and completely blindsided me. I expected a great junk of this episode to just be a very close battle. But Askeladd wins unarmed...

I didn’t expect this fight to be done and dusted just two minutes after the intro. But Thorfinn just lets his rage control his actions. That’s STILL his problem, especially when he fights Askeladd. No self-control whatsoever... And Askeladd even tried to tell him exactly that during their last encounter, and now he does it again...

I can feel Thorfinn’s disappointment.

However, I was not disappointed... because I got my long awaited Askeladd flashback!

I did already suspect that Askeladd had killed his father. I didn’t quite expect his story to be so similar to Thorfinn - and yet so different and way more succesfull.

Askeladd calling his father ugly... if the translation was correct here... really manifests his self-hatred... Because Olaf looks just like him.

And... seeing as I find Askeladd’s characterdesing the by far best in this show... I can’t really agree... Might be an asshole, but he looks great.

Anyway, I can’t believe how cold-blooded and brutal Askeladd already was as a kid. I mean, living with Olaf under the same roof for two years, being his son, gaining his father’s love and trust even and then still going through with his revenge even enjoying the look of utter betrayal in Olaf’s eyes so much that like... I don’t know 30 years later he still fawns over it... Again, just like with Thorfinn, I can understand where this anger comes from... but damn that’s brutal.

Nevermind how he then went about blaming his own brother causing his brutal death and essentially starting a war for sucessio between his brothers....

Wow...

Btw... I started thinking that his own hatred for his father’s line is why he doesn’t have any children of his own. Or at least it may be one of the reasons?

Anyway, we need to talk about Thorfinn. Because Askeladd really laid into him. And he was right. Thorfinn was an idiot! He just ran after Askeladd helping him out for years, doing all the dirty or dangerous work just so Askeladd could maybe grace him with the honor of a duel every few years or so. He might have been all “I’m not part of his army, I will kill him, he is my enemy” ... but he was the most loyal and trustworthy person in the entire group. He did everything asked of him and only because he wanted his revenge, and he wanted it the right way...

Askeladd used him for so long, and Thorfinn had a dozen possibilites to either kill him himself (stab him in the back or things like that) or just let him be killed by others. All because he wants a fair duel... And just this episode I realized that Askeladd really has nothing to fear from him. A few episodes back he said it himself, that eventually he’ll lose against Thorfinn, because he would grow old, while Thorfinn only gets stronger but... Askeladd also seems a bit self-destructive with how much he hates himself. So, would he even care? And if so... so what... He’s a warrior, as soon as he turns too old to hold his own he’ll probably die one way or the other. Never mind that let’s be perfectly honest, Thorfinn with his idea of a “fair duel between warriors” would he even deem a fight agains... I don’t know a sixty year old Askeladd “honorable” anymore?

And Thorfinn realizes it now too... He’s been used... very badly.

So I wonder if this is the moment when Thorfinn has to let go of his rage. I don’t know. At this point there are really only two options for him. Realizing that his rage cost him 11 years of serving his father’s murderer, never mind all the trauma he got from the murders he commited himself or helped committing. And then let go of it... OR second option: doubling down on it tenfold. I think with Leif still being close by, with where I want this story to go (to be perfectly honest this just me wishing for things again) I hope he can let go. At least a little bit.

Weirdly enough if he manages to let go, he might even have a better chance at defeating Askeladd... Still, I don’t feel like there will be another match between them. This felt final when I was still expecting a great fight... and even though that didn’t really happen, it still kind of feels final. I don’t think he will have another chance to kill Askeladd. I’ve now seen this fight four times. And I feel like just repeating it again and again would just keep Thorfinn stuck in this situation even though he now has the chance to move past it.

Other than that... This already very long.. longer than I wanted it to be... I did want to talk a little about Knut asking Askeladd why he wouldn’t want to be king. But I feel like I have to let that sink in a little before I truly understand it. Like I might understand Askeladd’s side of it now, that I heared his story, why he maybe doesn’t want to be or sees himself as a king. But I don’t quite know what this will do to Knut... What exactly he learned or might have missed in the story.

But... Just throwing that in because I really like the parallels. I like that Askeladd in a weird turn of events chose the character who was most like Thors in this story, to be “King”.

[jonandtormundendgame]

It really upsets me whenever I see people complaining about Jon’s ‘loss of personality post season 5’. No. Shut the fuck up right now. All through season 6 Jon was showing PTSS (it’s no longer called PTSD anymore because it’s a syndrome, not a disorder, meaning that it’s continual healing that you’re undergoing to get better, not) symptoms so hard that yes, it’s hard to watch, he’s quiet and meek because he’s terrified. He died and came back to life and he’s no longer sure who he can trust other than Sansa and Davos and Tormund (Sansa being completely focused on getting their home and family back, and Davos having been the reason he’s alive again at all, so he’s fairly sure he can trust him to help, and Tormund because that man is arguably closer to Jon than anyone at this point.)

Then you have season 7+. That’s still PTSS symptoms that he’s showing, but a lot of you never point out, that he’s showing it in 100% the same way that Sansa has been showing her PTSS symptoms since season 2 (maybe late season 1 even). But now that I think about it, a lot of y’all hate Sansa too so maybe this is just willful ignorance.

Let me break this down for you since no one in this fandom seems to recognize PTSS symptoms and why they appear. Jon has PTSS because of being killed. That much is obvious. All through season 6 Jon cling to Sansa and Davos because of a lingering fear of everyone around him. He got KILLED, stabbed by men he called brothers, betrayed and had his uncle used as bait to do it. You know what, they could have just cornered him in his office and killed him there just as easy, so why didn’t they? Because they needed to make him feel like a fool first. They played to his emotions. Jon has always acted on his emotions on an instinctual level, letting them control his actions by what he Feels Is Right for not only the people around him, but to move forward with as few casualties as possible. They told him they found his uncle and Jon was fucking delighted at the idea of another Stark. At the idea that he might not be alone in this world when everything is falling to shit. He’s unsure what to do to move forward and he’s regretting everything that happened behind and hoping beyond hope that Stannis could save Winterfell and his sister. And he’s hoping for someone that will understand. So he’s delighted that they think they might know where Benjen is (btw, Benjen likely knows who Jon’s mother is, he was the only Stark in Winterfell when Howland Reed brought Jon home, and he’s not stupid, and so likely, Jon’s whole life, Benjen was probably one of the few people that treated him like he was actually family). So he’s tricked, and he’s killed.

Jon’s emotions get the best of him. That’s his first PTSS symptoms and why it happens: repress emotion as much as you can. It doesn’t work very well in season 6. He’s clinging to Sansa and Davos as well as he can. He flinches when Sansa and a lord start fighting. He’s terrified of anyone. He’s terrified of men showing anger. He’s afraid of Sansa getting into a fight and possibly getting hurt. He wants to run away. But he stands strong, and for the first time since he basically showed on screen in season 1, he doesn’t let emotion rule that decision. He doesn’t run. He wants to, but he stays with Sansa. He clings and hides behind her, but he stays.

Now, then you get to season 7 and Jon meets Dany. The first thing that they do when him and Davos land on Dragonstone is to take their weapons. They sieze their ship and men. They leave them both with no way to defend themselves or run away (I almost wish things had gone differently at Dragonstone, because people seem to forget that Davos lived there with Stannis for a fucking long time, plus he’s arguably the best smuggler alive, so I thought it would be kind of cool if Davos and Jon were able to escape using Davis’s abilities if something happened) and now Jon and Davos are stuck there.

Do I think that Dany/Jon is real? No. Not even slightly. I think Jon played the same ruse that Sansa played, not once, not twice, but at least three times. Pretend you’re absolutely devoted to them in all ways. Have Davos drop a comment here or there about how Jon thinks she’s pretty while her Unsullied are around. Make it seem like Jon is hard to warm up at first but is slowly falling for her. He’s doing the same thing that Sansa did again and again. He’s faced with someone who’s not bigger and stronger than him, but with so much more power than him it’s unreal. Of course he’s going to pretend he’s on board. You’d have to be blind not to notice how uncomfortable he is around her, nothing in this world could convince me Jon/Dany was real, but he banked on her not knowing him well enough and hoping that Tyrion had possibly told her how much he never smiles and always broods at things, hope she doesn’t realize how truly uncomfortable he is with her.

Now then, why bend the knee when she’s already pledged her help with this threat to them? Well first of all, he’s just woken up to find himself her captive again, and that’s gotta be more than a little jarring, and second: it would make her happy. Right now she’s angry at the loss of one of her dragons, and she didn’t pledge to help them out of LOYALTY, but pure anger and rage that they would dare hurt what’s hers. So, turn that anger and promise to help, into happiness, and a promise to help. Oh you’ll help me, that’s amazing because I love you with all my heart, and now she has a reason not to go back on that pledge.

Now, why is this NOT a stupid move? Because Sansa is the real ruler of the North and Jon knows that. Even if she’s not the Queen yet, Jon knows fully well that even with the North bending the knee to Dany, she will still keep them all together with a strength that Northerners possess in spades, and the ability to power through and understand that Jon’s basically got no choice if they want Dany’s help. Sansa should be able to understand because I’m fairly sure that’s where Jon learned this all from in the first place.

So basically, what I’m saying, is that you can hate the writing all you want, think there’s a million plot holes that could never be filled no matter how much you think of it (all true, the writing was shit and there were so many plot holes I’ve basically written the last two seasons off as a crackfic at this point because wtf) but what I’m saying, is don’t you dare say that Jon lost his personality. Don’t say that he became 100% irrelevant. Don’t say that Kit didn’t do an amazing acting job turning what could have been the worst writing ever into an amazing character arc of dealing with mental illness and PTSS symptoms I’ve ever seen in a show that wasn’t ABOUT mental illness. Don’t say that he’s bland and boring and has no life to him anymore.

Stop looking at PTSS symptoms in characters and deciding it’s shitty writing because it doesn’t match their previous personality. Newflash asshole, personalities change when we go through traumatic events.

[tetrakys]

About Ikemen Vampire...

I finally got around to do the Ikemen Vampire first impressions post no one asked for, but I said I would do.

I’ve had the app on my phone for a while now, I mostly login and do the minigame to pile up on points and diamonds, but I’ve also played the butler event and a few chapters of Napoleon’s route.

FYI I only red a couple of spoilers on one route, so I’m jumping into this completely blind. Here we go.

The Premise:

A bunch of famous men from history turned vampires all living in the same mansion during a specific time in the past. On one side this is kinda interesting, on the other I know too much about many of these people (including their real aspect) to not face-palm every time I read their names, that’s why it took me so long to start this game. I knew it would need some getting used to it, and I have to admit I still find it strange at times. But well...

MC is, at least for now, the typical japanese otome game MC, so nothing exciting here, but maybe she will get gutsier moving forward? One can only hope. At least I like her love for travelling and she seems to know several languages.

Anyway if I’d been in her place, spending one month in the past with all these famous historical figures around, like hell I would’ve accepted to be a maid. I would’ve spent the whole time exploring and interviewing, I would’ve cut a deal with Le Comte, I’m sure he would’ve said yes. 

Anyway, let’s get to the guys, knowing that I’m an otome hoe and of course the plan is to get with all them (except maybe one). Team harem always for the win.

Ei fu.   Siccome immobile, Dato il mortal sospiro, Stette la spoglia immemore Orba di tanto spiro, Così percossa, attonita5 La terra al nunzio sta, ...

99% of the people reading won’t know what this is about. It’s one of the most important italian poems ever, it was written to celebrate Napoleon Bonaparte, it’s called Il Cinque Maggio (the date of Napoleon’s death... or in this case... resurrection as a vampire?). It’s huge, 108 verses, and I had to learn the whole thing by memory in school. It was so painful that it stuck with me to this day. That’s why I have a sort of love/hate relationship with the man.

But I decided to start with him for two reasons: I find this version of him hot and mysterious and I know his sexy scene is free so... who am I to turn down sexy times for free??

His back story of being half human half vampire is interesting and I am curious to see where this is going. I’m also curios to see how much cybird is sticking to history because the emperor had an interesting life to say the least. Including two wives, which I don’t want to think about because I am extremely jealous of all my otome boyfriends so I hope they are going to ignore this detail.

Yeah... no... this is so wrong... the guy died in exile in St Elena after failing to get his power back, speculations say that maybe he was even poisoned. It wasn’t a peaceful death and definitely he had regrets. 

I feel like I am putting too much thought into this and I should take the game as if these are just random people.

Anyway, Napoleon the character has a really pretty design, I love his eyes and his mysterious aura, and he looks like the honorable knight type. I hope he has also a kinky side because that’s how I roll and too good is not exactly my thing. He said he’s not attracted to MC pfff.... bullshit of course. We’ll see.

I don’t have much to say about Mozart because I’ve seen very little of him. I like his design, he seems to be the cold and slightly asshole type which I generally like, but too cold could put me off. If they’re going for any realism at all there could maybe be some daddy issues in his route?

This was the route that originally interested me the most because Leonardo was a genius and he’s the closest to home. Let’s ignore the fact that people keep using Da Vinci as if it was his surname WHICH IS NOT ,“da” means “from” and “Vinci” is a town, Leonardo from Vinci, he didn’t have a surname because he was a natural son. But other than that, there are two main points that make me consider skipping his route altogether. 

First of all, this is the only spoiler I have about the game, I know this story is sad whatever the ending, and I don’t do sad in my escapism. I only want happy endings, people may not agree but that’s my personal philosophy for playing these games.

Second, that “cara mia” triggers my rage every time I read it. As I explained in another post, “cara mia” is paternalistic and kinda offensive, “mia cara” is the sweet, caring one. The writers picked the wrong one and it’s soooo annoying to read. Especially because he repeats it quite a lot.

So, I’m not 100% sure yet, but this might be the first time in my history as an otome-player that I skip a route.

This. Adorable. Rascal. He might be the second route I play after Napoleon because I can’t wait to banter with this guy (if MC’s personality allows it). 

He seems as smart as his real counter-part and I like it.

I find a little annoying that he speaks like someone pretending to be British, it seems like the writers tried too hard, but what he says is kinda hilarious and I want him to (try to) bite me 👀

I assume they didn’t go completely with the realistic route here, otherwise Vincent should be a little coo coo, but the guy was sensitive and fragile and it seems that this was somehow preserved in the character. He has both ears though, so he probably isn’t completely suicidal. 

However he seems the totally sugary sweet type which is really not my thing. But I also heard he has one of the hottest sexy scenes in the game so colour me intrigued 👀

THIS! This is my man! I don’t know why I always fall for the tsundere, it’s not like I’m a masochist and like to be mistreated, but I like the bantering and I hope that MC is going to be cool enough to allow me to reply to him in tone. I really want to fight with him! 👀

Also, he’s sexy, and the fact that I know absolutely nothing about him, helps me not feeling annoyed by whatever it has been done to the character. 

I don’t know what to expect from his route. Does he have a brother complex? Is he jealous because his brother is a genius and he was a simple merchant? Why were they both turned? So many questions. Give me this beautiful asshole’s route soon cybird!

I know nothing about him too, but there’s something in him that irks me. He has a sort of paternalistic attitude, too many compliments, too polite... Also, that kimono has a strange fit.

On the positive side he seems protective and I like his quirkiness, so we’ll see.

Newton is the one that, together with Leonardo, interested me the most for pure principle. And, in this case, I am quite satisfied. I like his aesthetics and personality-wise he seems similar to Mozart, quiet, distant type. We’ll see.

I keep wondering why they turned a female character male, they could’ve added a wlw route. Anyway, I won’t complain because look-wise I like him the most out of everyone. The eye patch intrigues me, I like his style and I find him really beautiful. I know though that his route is the least sexy and that’s a bummer. I am curious about him and his route and wonder if he also hears voices in his head.

In this case I’m pretty sure we’re far away from the real person. William the character is the yandere of the group and even the other vampires seem a little preoccupied by him. I wonder if his route is maybe a little dangerous, I’m intrigued.

Mmm... I know I’m going to attract the disappointment of his many fans but I don’t like Saint-Germain. He’s handsome yes, but the one thing I hate in LIs is fakeness and duplicity, and I feel it with every bone in my body this guy is a liar. He emanates the same vibes as Lucien and Leiftan. There’s so much you’re hiding Comte, and you don’t fool me one bit! Also, his colour palette is too yellow for my tastes.

Sebastian is just boring to me. I don’t know.... he looks and sounds so plain. I hope there is some big mystery behind and that he will show more personality because at the moment he’s just meh. Also he can’t be just a simple, unknown human there must be something else (I hope).

So, currently, the characters who interest me are: Theo, Arthur, Isaac, Napoleon, Jean, William, Wolfgang 

While Vincent, Sebastian, Dazai, Leonardo and Comte all follow at the back of the queue.

Let’s see after a couple of months of playing if my opinions change.

And btw I’ve seen the three new vampires and they look so much cooler than all the main ones combined! I can’t wait for their routes to come out.