#they call me the bird

[crowseverywhere]

im like parry girpp but instead of producing certified bangers i just post it on tumblr for my nonexistent audience :3

[novasintheroom]

Ghost who, under “orders” from his army therapist (and with Price’s encouragement), starts looking around for hobbies when he’s on leave.

Not sure what to do at first. Tries gaming but gets bored of it and the PS4 stays gathering dust in his flat. Plants don’t appeal to him because he won’t be around enough to take care of them. Thinks about knitting, but is a bit too embarrassed to walk into the local craft shop to start making doilies.

Finally goes to the library after seeing a flyer advertising a painting class and thinks, “Hell, why not.”

Shows up in his hoodie, black face mask, and black baseball cap. Gives most of the old ladies attending the painting session a good scare

Until he rolls up his sleeves to avoid getting paint on his good hoodie. Then those old ladies are ogling his forearms and the tattoos painting his skin.

Is very attentive to the hired artist leading the session. Hasn’t got an artistic bone in his body, but dammit, he’s going to report back to his therapist that he tried if it’s the last thing he does.

Two little old ladies, Mrs. Levine and Ruby, pluck up the courage to sit beside him and start chatting him up. Compliments his painting, talk about their grandkids, how one of Ruby’s grandsons is into heavy metal (assuming Ghost is as well). Ghost listens half-heartedly, just trying to get the brown right for the deer he’s putting on paper. They manage to weasel out his name:

“Simon,” he announces gruffly.

“Oh, what a good name,” Mrs. Levine says.

He goes to the next activity as well: polymer clay creations. His hands are big and meaty and he has to take more clay than is probably reasonable to make the little pig he’s got going.

Mrs. Levine and Ruby are there too and sit right next to him to chat with him again. They love his idea of a pig and make a cow and sheep to go with it. When the hired artist comes around to see how everyone’s doing, Mrs. Levine announces that the three of them “have a little farm going” and that “Simon’s the farmhand.”

He's glad he's got his face mask on. He can feel his ears going red at the look the artist gives him.

Again, he’s very attentive to the hired artist, watching her hands carve into the soft clay with her nails to get texture on her dinosaur. He tries to do the same, giving whispy little hairs to his pig. It’s not pretty, but he feels a smidge better about going when it’s all done.

Mrs. Levine and Ruby get more information out of him as time goes on and he attends more activities. Soon their friends join in on the conversation, and Ghost – Simon – is well-known at the library for being the military guy who attends every Saturday when he’s not deployed. The little old ladies love him, even if he “doesn’t say much.” He’s helped them carry their bags of books and crafts to their cars, listens to them prattle on about activities and their aches and pains, and even scared off some hooligans who were trying to disrupt their library activity.

(They’ve all got little old lady crushes on this big man who takes time out of his day to better himself, and they love his dry/dad jokey humor)

(And he won't admit it, but these are his little old ladies now. Clarice brought him brownies that he absolutely devoured when he got back to his flat they were so good, and he can't help but laugh at how often they try to set him up with their granddaughters. And how they "trip" often just to hang on to his big arms. Birds are birds, no matter their age.)

[z13lovebot]

Go fish

[pokimoko]

Asexual bird? Please

How about two asexual birds?

[zionmantis]

Hoooo boy. It's finally finished. This only took me eight months to paint. T.T

Disco Elysium is soooo good y'all; I feel like I'll never give it the credit it deserves.

I'm not even sure it's finished, but I'm just going to set this down now, though.

Clip studio paint and a ton of downloaded watercolor and acrylic brushes.

Let me know if you want me to pull out any closeups or anything

[whack-patty]

A clump

[yeetmyboi]

My lil brain cell just had a little thought about freshly being Simon’s wife and you get invited to your first outing with the bois and their birds and Simon gets to see a side of you he absolutely loves.

Like maybe it’s a small outing just for everyone to meet and get to know each other. You get nervous about meeting so many people at the same time, let alone some of Simon’s close friends and coworkers.

Perhaps you’re a bit self conscious about being a bigger gal, but it all deflates when you see you’re not the only one. Price’s wife, just as plush, is very welcoming and friendly. She pulls you into a tight hug, ‘welcoming’ you into their little ‘wives’ club and immediately introduces you to Johnny’s and Kyle’s significant others.

After the first hour, you find yourself feeling a bit silly about being so nervous and start loosening up. It all reaches a head when Johnny suggests a cheeky game of softball or kickball. (And of course it’s these trained special forces men vs their cute wives, duhh).

You’ve played sports in the past, finding you had a bit of a competitive streak. So, you’re not surprised that it resurfaces during what should be a relaxed game. Even the other wives get into it, playful trash talk and teasing ensues.

At one point, you hit the ball and manage to steal not just one base but two.

Simon can’t help but grin. He likes seeing the determination on your face. The look that he swears could move mountains.

Absolutely goes feral seeing you dive to avoid Johnny’s attempt to tag you out and touch base. Gray dust and gravel covers your outfit as you pluck yourself back up.

The whole thing turns him on. Seeing his soft bird have a sharp edge to her, a bit of grit to her softness. The duality of it all is enough to give this man something else to distract him for the rest of the get together

Definitely something he’s gonna have to show you the second you two are alone in the parking lot as the others leave.

Just a thought lol 🤭🤭

[bruciemilf]

Absolute “can my friends and I have a sleepover” energy

[puppppppppy]

horrible truth bomb dropped on my head 20 min ago

[ammascrellin]

And when I'm back in Chicago, I feel it Another version of me, I was in it

lady bird (2017) / the bear (2022–) / frances ha (2012) / past lives (2023) / good will hunting (1997) / lost in translation (2003) / fleabag (2016–2019) / normal people (2020) / la la land (2016) / moonlight (2016) / sharp objects (2018) / the worst person in the world (2021) / call me by your name (2017) / shiva baby (2020)

[queen-lance]

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

‘Poseidon left a party in Ethiopia because the sea vibes went rancid after Odysseus set sail’ feels like a bit I would make up, but no. That actually happened.

[jeeaark]

Please take a moment to consider the following:

Karlach is an orphan.

Karlach can talk to birds (her default subclass gets 'speak with animals')

Karlach gets advantage on performance checks like singing and dancing (thanks thaumaturgy!)

Karlach... is a Disney princess.

[fence-time]

I will forever hold the hc that all the hermits partners are gods / cosmic entities of some sort just so I can continue to draw them like this :3

[ghost-bxrd]

Prompt:

Jason drinks alcohol for the first time ever post resurrection and makes some questionable choices in the form of plastered phone calls and worrisome messages/voicemails.

He wakes up the next morning to at least ten missed calls and dozens of panicked text messages.

[chirrups]

yeeeehaawww!

aka. a titlecard for my ranchers western au where the boys set out for a new life out west but jimmy is so horrifically doomed by the narrative that they make it all of one day before things fall apart. luckily tango will do anything to keep his rancher alive, including an ill-advised deal with the devil. they are going to get their happy ending, fate be damned.

no-text ver under the cut + her ugly ass planning phase sister