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svnriseblvdd · 2 days ago

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AND FOR ONCE, YOU LET GO OF YOUR FEARS AND YOUR GHOSTS — dick grayson

hurt/comfort, slight angst (he's okay in the end), love confession, big steps in a relationship. when dick grayson stumbles through his girlfriend's window in the early hours of the morning, she's there to patch him up and listen to all that troubles him.

It’s some time after four in the morning when Dick Grayson finally steps through the window into your apartment. He shouldn’t be here. It’s not fair on you. He knows it’s not, but he can’t help himself.

He’s silent as he moves across your living room floor, still silent as he opens your bedroom door. He hates that he has to be here. He hates even more the fact that you left your living room window open a crack so he could come in. He’s closed it now, locked it and made sure all the security measures he’d installed for you were in place how they should be.

He doesn’t want to wake you, doesn’t want to disturb you as you look so peaceful in the comfort of sleep. He doesn’t even need to touch you. Well, he does. But he won’t. Not if it’ll wake you up.

He just needs to see you. Needs to know you’re safe, alive, breathing, content. He needs to sit in the comfort of the sound of your breathing, the smell of everything that’s so unequivocally you. The detergent on fresh sheets, your shampoo, shower gel, the remnants of your perfume lingering. Even the underlying scent of your worn shoes that just barely creeps through everything else.

He knows where not to step. Where floor creaks and where there’s little things hellbent on stabbing him in the foot. Not that they’d do a good job through the suit, but he won’t risk it.

But through all his manoeuvring, he bends just slightly too far the wrong way, and he’s hissing in pain.

You stir, and hum. He thinks for a moment that maybe it’s okay. Maybe that’s it. Maybe he hasn’t woken you up and ruined your sleep because he’s an idiot.

But he’s wrong. “Dick?” You mumble. “You there?”

He winces. Not at the annoying pain in his side, but because now you’re awake. It’s nearly 5:00 AM and you’re awake because he didn’t think.

“It’s okay,” he whispers. “It’s okay, honey, go back to sleep.”

“What time is it?”

He looks at the clock on your nightstand. The numbers on it glow faintly, almost accusatory. Oh, he knows.

“4:47,” he replies. “I’m sorry for waking you, baby.”

You push yourself up, eyes opening properly and taking in the sight of him. Your eyes are soft as you evaluate him, the redness of his cheek as a bruise begins to form, the cut above his eyebrow, the faint glow of the lenses of his mask, which he has yet to take off. “Dick-”

“Don’t worry about me, baby. I’m okay.”

You shake your head. “Come here.”

“’m dirty. You just washed your sheets.”

“I don’t care.” You stand from the bed, patting it. “Sit. Wait while I get the first aid kit.”

He gives in, sitting on the edge of the bed and waiting for your return. It’s not a long wait, but every second without you feels like agony. It’s worse than anything that happened tonight.

When you return, you sink onto the bed next to him, setting the kit down next to you. “Let me see those pretty eyes,” you whisper, lifting the mask from him. His beautiful blue eyes meet yours, and it hurts to see the sadness in them.

You dab at the cut above his eyebrow with an alcohol-dipped cotton pad. You know that nights like these, he needs time before he can open up about it. So you treat the cut on his brow, the bruise on his cheek. Then you begin pushing his suit down his shoulders and torso.

“If you wanted me out of my clothes that badly, all you had to do was ask,” he jokes, but it lacks the same tone he usually has. Dick flirts with you all the time. Even now that you’ve been together for almost a year. And he still holds the same charm that he did when you first met, when he first realised his feelings and decided he was going to ‘make a move’. But tonight, he doesn’t hold the same charm or humour in his voice.

“Dick…” you murmur. He’d spent far too long being valued by Gotham’s social elite and their tabloids only for his looks. He was gorgeous, there was no denying that, he was the most wonderful person you’d ever laid eyes upon. But he was far too used to being a performer, even through his worst times, laying on the charm thick as possible when he had to attend a gala that fell during some of the bad days.

You get the suit down to his waist, where you let it rest as you evaluate the bruises, cuts and scrapes on his chest and abdomen.

You begin cleaning a cut on his chest, wondering whether or not it’ll need stitches. “What happened?”

He shook his head. “Nothing.” At your expression, he sighs. “I just- my head wasn’t in it.”

“Then where was your head?” You ask, threading the needle. “Hm? Tell me what’s going on, Dick.”

“I just… don’t know if I’m enough,” he whispers.

Your expression turns softer still. “What? Dick, of course you are. You’re more than enough. If you ask me, you’re more than most of this city deserves.” He sniffs, still trying to hold in the tears. “Do you want me to numb it before I start the stitches?”

He shakes his head. “No. No, I can take it. It’s okay.”

You begin to sew the cut shut, back and forth, back and forth. It’s muscle memory by now, the number of times you’d stitched him up after a rough night. Never like this, though. Usually, even when he’d taken worse beatings, he could still crack jokes easily and he’d still lay on that Dick Grayson charm. Not tonight.

When you’re done, you lean down, placing soft kisses along the edge. You cover over a graze on his side, the one he’d irritated earlier that had led to you waking up.

“I’m sorry for waking you,” he says, voice heavy with regret and despair.

“It’s okay.”

“It’s not okay. It’s not. You have work.”

You shake your head. “No, I don’t. I’m taking the day off. Want to spend time with you.”

“You don’t have to do that. You shouldn’t. I’m not worth it.”

“You’re more than worth it, honey. Besides, I’ve had it booked since last week, so I can’t just take it back.” You reach up with one hand to cup his face, tilting his head to look at you. His eyes are filled with tears. “Oh, Dick, sweetheart.”

He breaks then. The tears spill over, and he collapses into your hold, your arms wrapping around him. He smells of blood, sweat, dirt, and smoke, but you don’t care one bit. You’ll hold him forever if that’s what he needs.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers, over and over again. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” He lets out a sob. “I’m sorry.”

“There’s nothing to be sorry about, my love,” you assure him. “I promise you, that you’re more than enough. Do you trust me?” He nods. “Then trust that I’m telling you the truth.”

“Sometimes, it feels like I’m falling and I won’t ever stop.”

“I know, honey. But I’m here to catch you. I’ll always be here. You do so much for this city, for your team, your family, me. You work so hard, honey, and I know that it’s difficult. And I know you don’t feel like it’s enough sometimes but it is. You’re so good, Dick. You bring hope, safety, happiness. I know it’s a lot of responsibility, but you shoulder it so well. I just wish you didn’t feel like you had to take on everything. Sometimes you need a break, and that’s okay.”

“But who else protects Bludhaven?”

“That’s the problem, Dick. You take care of this all by yourself.”

“Bruce protected Gotham by himself.”

“Bruce hadn’t been Batman for nearly as long before you came along. Besides, he’s had help for years now. You handle Bludhaven, you still help in Gotham, you run the Titans. Hell, you help the Justice League from time to time. Even Bruce has bad times too. Even Batman struggles with his responsibilities. Both of you have yourselves convinced that you have to take on all this responsibility and pressure because if you don’t, you’re not worthy of love. But even with all that, neither of you think you’re enough. And I love you for your heroism and your courage and your goodness. I really do, but you need days off. You need time to just be Dick Grayson. Not Nightwing, not the Wayne heir, not the socialite the tabloids love. Just Dick. The same one who I fell for.”

He stops sniffling for a few seconds, just breathing irregularly. “You love me?” He whispers then, breaking the silence. He pulls back, your arms falling loosely to his sides. You hadn’t realised you’d said it.

“Yes,” you whisper back. “Yeah, I love you.”

“I love you too,” he says, hands cupping your face. “So much.”

You smile, and it’s the first time tonight that he’s smiled and it’s felt genuine. He kisses you, softly, lovingly, every inch of his soul poured into you. It’s such a simple kiss. Neither of you dare deepen it - you both know it’s not the time. It’s just ordinary, small, wet with his tears, but it’s the most wonderful, caring action.

“Do you want something to drink?” You ask, pulling away from him.

“No.”

“How about a bath? Or a shower?”

“No, I just want to hold you.”

You smile softly, nodding. “Let me find something for you to wear. It’s colder tonight.” You stand, moving around your room to find any of his clothes that he’s left behind. You think you might’ve run out of clean things of his in his allocated drawer. “It’s getting really difficult, working with only one drawer of your clothes.”

“Especially when you use my shirts to sleep in,” he comments.

“True.” You hum as you find a pair of his sweatpants, folding them over your arm.

“Maybe it would be easier if we just lived together,” he says.

You turn to him, now holding one of your baby tees, mistaken for a shirt of his. The words “I’m too sexy for this shirt” stare at him, standing out against the white cotton. “Do you mean it?” You ask.

“I do. I want us to live together. I love seeing our shoes next to each other when we stay together. I love seeing your things at my place. I love cooking together. I want to stay up late talking to you. I want to dance in the kitchen in the middle of the night. I want to come home to you.”

You smile, practically attacking him with the way you hug him. “I want all of that too.” You kiss his cheeks, then his forehead, then peck him on the lips before you roll off the bed to look for a t-shirt. You throw the items at him when you’ve found them.

When he’s changed, the two of you lay in bed, wrapped in each other’s arms. And you look up at him while the first hints of the sunrise filter through the crack in the curtains.

You look up at him, and he meets your eyes, a loving smile on his face. “I love you, Dick Grayson. And I can’t stand to see you destroy yourself.”

“I love you too. I’ll stay together for you.”

#dick grayson imagine #dick grayson x reader #nightwing x reader #dick grayson x you #nightwing x you #muse: dick

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supernotnatural2005 · 3 days ago

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Headcanon: Comforting you after a loss.

Pairing: Dean x reader, Beau Arlen x Reader, Soldier Boy/Ben x Reader

Warnings/Tags: Mentions of loss, angst, fluff, established relationships

AN: This is just a little something for @jackles010378, I'm sorry you're going through a difficult time, and hope this cheers you up some ❤️

Main Masterlist

Dean Winchester

Dean isn’t great with words when it comes to grief—he knows there’s nothing he can say to take your pain away.

But he’s damn sure not going to let you go through it alone.

The moment he sees the heartbreak in your eyes, he'll pull you into his arms, holding you tightly against his chest.

“I got you, sweetheart,” he'll murmur, pressing a lingering kiss to your crown.

He would stay like that for as long as you needed, grounding you in his warmth, his security.

In the following days, he would watch over you like a hawk—not smothering, but making sure you’re eating, drinking, and not shutting down completely.

He’ll cook you your favourite food, even run in to town to get you your favourite cheeseburger if that's what you wanted.

If you can’t sleep, neither does he. He’ll stay up, letting you rest against him, running his fingers through your hair until it finally lulled you to sleep

And when the grief feels unbearable, when you finally break down in front of him, he'll just hold you, whispering soft reassurances.

“You don’t have to be strong for me, baby. Just let it out. I’m right here.”

He never rushes your healing, never tries to fix what can’t be fixed—he just loves you through it, in the way only Dean Winchester can.

Beau Arlen

Beau doesn’t pretend to have all the answers, but he knows one thing for sure—you’re his, and he’s not going to let you go through this alone.

The first thing he does is hold you.

Not just some half-hearted hug—no, he wraps you up in his arms, pressing slow, lingering kisses to your temple, your cheek, your forehead.

“I got you, sweetheart,” he'll murmur, his voice thick with emotion. “I ain’t goin’ anywhere.”

He checks on you constantly—bringing you coffee, making sure you eat, running his fingers over your back in soothing circles when you can’t bring yourself to get out of bed.

And when the silence in the house feels too heavy, he takes you on a drive—windows down, his hand resting over yours on the gearshift.

“Just us, baby,” he says softly. “Breathe.”

At night, when the weight of your grief is too much, he pulls you onto his lap, cradling you against him.

“I wish I could take this pain away from you,” he admits, pressing his lips against your shoulder. “But I’ll carry as much of it as I can, darlin’.”

He'll hold you for as long as you need, whispering sweet reassurances between soft, lingering kisses, letting you cry into his chest if that’s what you need.

Beau Arlen isn’t just your man—he’s your safe place, and he’ll spend every day reminding you of that.

Soldier Boy/Ben

Gif by @becauseofthebowties

Ben doesn’t do emotions. Not really.

He’s spent decades brushing off pain, cracking jokes, and punching his way through problems.

People cry? He rolls his eyes. People break down? He walks the other way. That’s just how he is.

But you? You’re different.

When he sees you hurting, something inside him tightens, and for once, he doesn’t have some snarky comment locked and loaded.

Instead, he stands there, fists clenching and unclenching at his sides, unsure of what the hell he’s supposed to do.

At first, he tries to be himself about it—gruff, no-nonsense.

“Hey, shit happens. People die, the world keeps turning.”

But when you don’t react, when you just sit there looking so damn lost, he feels something foreign creeping in. Worry.

So, he does the only thing he can think of—he pulls you into his arms, tight, unyielding. His grip is almost bruising, like he’s afraid you’ll disappear if he lets go.

“I got you, baby,” he mutters against your hair, his voice rough but lacking its usual edge. “I ain’t goin’ anywhere.”

He’s awkward about it—comfort isn’t his thing—but for you, he tries.

He sticks close, hovering even when he pretends he’s not. He won’t outright ask if you’re okay, but suddenly, he’s around more.

Sitting next to you, brushing his fingers against yours, silently daring you to take his hand.

When the grief finally crashes over you, when you collapse against him in sobs, he stiffens at first—old instincts screaming at him to run.

But then he melts, wrapping you up in his arms, pressing rough kisses to the top of your head.

“Shhh, sweetheart,” he mutters, voice softer than you’ve ever heard it. "I got you.”

That night, he doesn’t leave your side. He pulls you into his chest, holds you close, fingers tangled in your hair.

“You’re not alone, doll,” he whispers, voice raw. “Not anymore.”

And maybe he’s never said those words before, but for once, he means every damn one of them.

AN: Okay so this was a new one for me. A first try at Headcanon's 😅 I hope I've done it justice and cheered you up a little @jackles010378 ❤️

If you would like to be tagged in my future works please respond to this >form< so I can add you to the character's you'd like 😊

Dean, Beau, Soldier Boy/Ben Tag List:

@happyfxckinghorrors @crooked-haven @chevroletdean @lyarr24 , @impala67rollingthroughtown @bettystonewell @nancymcl @ambiguous-avery @jollyhunter @tbgfvfdcb @paganvamp @deans-baby-momma @ladykitana90 @riteofpassage77 @jackles010378 @spnaquakindgdom

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transformers-spike · 2 days ago

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Megatron: So, which one of us will be the object of your affection?

Y/N: Oh man, this'll be so hard, I don't think-

Random vehicon walks in

Y/N: HELLO SAILOR!

Vehicon: What?

Y/N: Do you wanna go out like... on a date?

Dating all the main cons? Nay. Vehicon

Out of everyone I think Dreadwing and Breakdown would take the rejection the best (also Skyquake but oh well he's kinda deader than the rest) You want to be with a vehicon? Understandable, Dreadwing will retract himself. Breakdown is frustrated but he's got Knock Out at least. And well, the vehicons deserve some support too, he knows that better than anyone Everyone else ranges from mildly annoying to extremely dangerous. Knock Out would be pissy you chose a vehicon over him. He's going to complain to Breakdown for hours on end, but he gets over it pretty fast all things considered. His laissez-faire attitude helps Soundwave is on a surface level pretty understanding. But he's definitely not over you, but denies it internally. He'll keep watching you on the security cameras, even sending out Laserbeak to spy for him. He tells himself it's to keep you safe, but bro is just unable to cope with the finality of the rejection. At least no one knows. Starscream and Megatron are by far the worst. Both are willing to abuse their power to make the vehicon's life hell. Starscream is going to be a lot more of a raging asshole and he'll try his hardest to show you just how pathetic the vehicon is in comparison to him Megatron is dangerous. He will orchestrate the vehicon's death - put them in the front line and away from his beloved human, then offer them comfort once their vehicon eventually dies. Straight up killing them would ruin his image, both around his love interest and his troops. Manipulation is his best shot Man this got angsty real fast

#transformers x human #transformers x reader #transformers prime #maccadam #headcanon hour #tfp megatron #tfp starscream #tfp soundwave #tfp breakdown #tfp dreadwing #tfp knock out #kby 298 saga

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akicine · 2 days ago

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Helloo!

Not sure if you have requests open, if not pls lmk.

I was wondering if I could request platonic Blade with a reader who has been with him since their childhood because reader lost their parents early (reader is around teen years) but got separated from him in a disaster and gets reunited with them many years later.

An: 👍 Love the concept! And sorry for it taking too long my motivation has been down the drain for the past month because work is just not working out for me.

THIS IS PLATONIC

Will we ever meet again?(Platonic Blade x Reader)

It’s been so long since he’s since your face , even if it’s been years , even with the Mara clawing at the edges of his sanity and tearing the fragile frames of memories in his head , he could never forget you.

Not when he raised you when nobody else would .

Not when he held your hand when you got lost or uncomfortable, or when he let you squirm underneath the covers of his bed whenever you got nightmares.

When he had to take you to the battle field , he would rip off a piece of his coat and cover it over your eyes , while also seating you somewhere relatively far away from the battle , he wouldn’t bother with others , but at the time , the urge to keep you safe and secure was overwhelming.

When he lost you, he felt lost, just like in the beginning, when he was a mere shell with no soul inside . Taking care of you had brought out something inside of him that made him feel alive.

He sat in his quarters , staring at the wall, the Mara eating away at his mind at a quicker pace, causing Kafka to use her sprit whisper much more often.

He eventually got over you, but he still had that hole in his heart, weeping as he lost part of his soul.

So now , when he finally sees you again, it feels like a miracle, you’ve aged , but he hasn’t. He doesn’t know whether or not you remember him, but even if your appearances changed drastically, he would always recognize you.

He did raise you after all.

He sees the light in your eyes are gone now , and so was the innocence you used to have . It’s now replaced with a more natural and aged look , one that tells a story of sorrow and harshness.

Before he can slowly sink into his memories , your voice brings him out of it .

“ I- … Hello , blade …” Your timid voice and the new title you call him makes him surprised , he expected you to be a little bit for familiar with him , but he supposes it’s because it’s been years.

He stares at you for a little while , before his raspy voice catches your attention.

“Hello….. How… have you been doing?”

Even though his face remained indifferent, there was a tinge of uncertainty in his tone , almost as if he feared making you uncomfortable.

You’ll never forget how you kicked and screamed when he first picked you up.

A laugh was coaxed out of your throat because of that thought, making him raise an eyebrow .

You quickly wave your hands in front of you, thinking that it could disperse the confusion, “I’m not laughing at you! I promise really!”

He sighs , before raising a hand out of instinct and gently patting your head , making you freeze.

Both of you freeze actually.

One of out shock , the other out of fear of hurting you.

You look up at him before holding , gently place your hand over his and smiling at him.

“ Do you think… I can still call you my father?”

A small, rarely seen smile appears on his face, one that is familiar to you . His hand gently resumes running through your hair, the familiar sensation making you feel more comfortable around him.

With a gentle voice you remember, he says

” Yes, of course you can.”

#angst #honkai star rail #hsr #fluff #blade honkai star rail #blade hsr #blade x reader #blade x y/n #hsr blade #platonic relationships #platonic

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samanthacastano02 · 2 days ago

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Felix - Perfect

Felix x FemReader

Trigger warnings: Abuse (Physical and verbal abuse from Hyunjin), fighting, tooth-rotting fluff, inaccurate medical terminology, Felix being a sweetheart and most supportive person ever, starts off as Hyunjin x FemReader ends as Felix x FemReader, mentions of break up, insecurity, probably more (This is fictional and not how I believe Hyunjin or any of the members would ever act towards someone they love)

Word Count: 10.1K

Summary: You had been dating Hyunjin for almost two years when he had asked you to join him at an event for Versace. You were excited to join him but also nervous because this would be the first time that you would be going to an event like this. You get into a fight, a fight that opens your eyes about your relationship with Hyunjin, so you leave. You call Felix for help and he becomes your rock and safe place during everything.

Photos are not mine, Credits go to photographers

I had been dating Hyunjin for close to two years, he was my first serious relationship and I didn’t know how I was supposed to be treated. I thought that the way he was treating me was the way someone who loved you treated you, not realizing that wasn’t the case.

Present:

I loved Hyunjin with everything that I had, and when he said that he was finally ready to announce our relationship to the public I was over the moon because it had been a year and a half of secret dates, secret outings and hiding it from everyone including his other members. I didn’t think much of it because he was an idol and maybe he wanted to keep this part of his life separate for some time so that it was his rather than something that he had to share with everyone. I didn’t enjoy having to sneak around but I did it for him because I loved him and I didn’t want to ruin my chances with him just because of the fact that he wanted to keep the relationship secret. When the boys finally met me, they welcomed me with open arms and treated me as if I had been friends with them the entire time. The only person who seemed to be a little standoffish and hesitant to be friends was Felix, he was always nice and held conversations when required but he always seemed to isolate himself when Hyunjin and I were hanging out with the boys together. I could never pinpoint why he acted this way, but also didn’t question it because Hyunjin never liked it when I spent one on one time with any of the boys, even Chan who saw me as an annoying younger sister.

It was a few weeks before Hyunjin had to go to Milan’s fashion week, as Versace’s ambassador. I knew that he was excited to go because it was all that he could talk about, and the preparations for it had been taking up most of his time, leaving me to busy myself with work and different things around the apartment that we shared. I was beyond proud of him because he had worked so hard for this and he deserved to have this moment. I didn’t want to bring him down by mentioning the fact that I missed him. When he came home late, I didn’t question him, when he came home smelling of different perfume I didn’t question him because I assumed that it had something to do with the fashion week and if he wanted me to know he would tell me. It was a little before midnight when he finally came home tonight, looking worn out and ready to take a very long nap.

“Hi lovie, how were your meetings? Everything almost ready for Milan Fashion Week?” I ask, as I follow him into the bedroom, crawling into bed while I wait for him to change and go through his skin care routine.

“They were good, longer than I thought they would be. I also managed to secure another ticket and want you to be my plus one.” he says finally coming back into the bedroom.

“You want me to come with? Are you sure?” “Of course, I want to share this part of my life with you.” He says, if I wasn’t as tired as I was I would have noticed the hint of annoyance in his voice.

“I’d love to join you, but I don’t have anything that I could wear.” “Love, I have an appointment set for you to get a dress from the Versace store here in town.” “Hyunjinnie, that’s so expensive though.”

“If you are going with me, you need to represent Versace along with me” He grumbles out, sliding further down into the bed.

“I can’t even afford something small from there, let alone a dress. Jinnie, I don’t want you to spend that much money on me.” “If it’s that big of a deal I’m sure we can get it as a loaner dress and when we get back from the event we can bring it back to the store. Now can we please go to bed, it’s been a long day and I’m tired.”

“Right, of course. Sleep well Jinnie.” I lean over, gently kissing his cheek.

It was only a few days later that I was walking into the Versace store and feeling very much out of my element. I wasn’t used to this high end of a store, so trying to figure out where I needed to go and what all I needed in order to get the dress. Thankfully the attendants were super sweet and understanding about the fact that this was the first event I was ever going to of this caliber and gave me tips to help not be as nervous. With the dress finally picked out, they assured me that it would be sent to Milan and be waiting for me in the hotel room when I got there, I didn’t have to worry about it at all. I was extremely thankful for that, it was one less thing that I needed to worry about.

With Milan Fashion Week quickly approaching, Hyunjin seemed to be around the house even less than he was before. I didn’t want to think too much of it but it was hard when I barely received a text from him letting me know if he was even going to be home that night or if he was going to be spending it at the dorms with Changbin. My only saving grace was being able to talk to Han. Han had become a close friend of mine even though Hyunjin didn’t know. There was nothing going on between us, and there never would, but Han could tell when I was anxious and knew that I needed someone on my side that wasn’t Hyunjin. Because as he put it, Hyunjin hadn’t been doing very good at his boyfriend duties and was being neglectful of how I was feeling and of my anxiety. We had bonded over the fact that we both deal with anxiety and don’t always want to tell someone else in the fear of becoming a burden to them. I had received a text from Hyunjin early today that he wouldn’t be home tonight, he would be staying with Changbin since they all had an early morning. I tried to not be upset about it but I still couldn’t stop the tears from falling. I knew that if I didn’t talk to someone I would send myself into a panic, so I did the only thing I could think of and called Han, hoping that he would come over and keep me company. When I called, he picked up on the second ring, a cute habit of his.

“Hannie, Jinnie is staying with Changbin tonight and I really don’t want to be alone tonight. I’m too much in my head, can you please come over?” I almost begged the poor man.

“Y/nnie, calm down please. Of course I’ll come over, how could I ever turn down a hangout session with my favorite person?”

“Han, my dear dear friend. We both know that I am not your favorite person, Minho is your favorite person.” “Ok, correction. Second favorite person, because yeah, if we’re honest he’s my favorite.”

“Glad to see where I stand in your life Hannie.” “Girl, do you want me to come over or not?”

“Yes! Please!” “I’ll be over soon then, will you make up the spare room for me? We both know that I won’t have the energy to go home and we also know that Minho Hyung won’t be coming to get me.” “Yes, I’ll make up the spare room for you.”

He doesn’t even say goodbye, just hangs up the phone. I know that he lives close by, all of the boys do, which confused me on why Hyunjin wouldn’t take the extra five or so minutes to come back to the apartment. But I won’t question him on it because all that’ll do is lead to a fight. The movie night with Han was something that was very much needed, and when he had to leave the next morning the apartment felt so much more lifeless. I knew that if Hyunjin knew Han was here, he’d be upset but I also didn’t want to be alone so I risked him being upset.

Later that night:

When Hyunjin came home that night from practice, I could tell that he was agitated. He barely spoke to me and when he did his answers were short and snappy, I didn’t want to pry but I also wanted to help him if I was able to. It was too late when I realized that I had forgotten to make up the bed after washing the sheets, after Han spent the night. I knew that the moment Hyunjin saw that, he would ask questions and there was no way that I would be able to give him a reasonable explanation without revealing the full truth to him.

“Hey, y/n. Why are the sheets not on the bed in the guest bedroom?” Hyunjin called out to me from the hallway while I was in the kitchen making dinner for the two of us.

“Huh? Oh I was washing them, they were dusty.” “Y/n, you know not to lie to me. Now tell me why you are actually washing them.” “Fine. Han was over last night, by the time our movie ended it was too late for him to drive home and we weren’t about to wake the beast who is Minho.”

“You know I don’t like when you spend time with them one on one.” He angrily stomps over to me, I expect him to just corner me but instead he grabs me by my pony tail, pulling me away from the stove where I was cooking.

“Ahh, Hyunjin. That hurts. Stop.” I try to pry his hand out of my hair but it doesn’t work.

“You went against what I asked. You know I don’t like you being alone with the guys, I don’t want them getting too close.” He gets in my face, pulling my head back so that I am forced to look at him.

“I-I’m sorry Hyunjin, it won't happen again.” “It better not, or the next time I won’t go easy on you.” He growls out, shoving my head away, causing me to fall into the stove. I try to catch myself but end up grabbing onto the hot pan, burning my hand. The contents in the pan fling out and land all over me, burning my skin through my clothes.

“O-oh god. Y/n I’m so sorry. I’m sorry, are you ok?” Hyunjin’s whole personality changes when he notices what had just occurred.

“I-I’m ok. I-I just need to get myself cleaned up and check the burns and make sure that I don’t need to go to the hospital.” I respond after taking a couple deep breaths.

“Y-you think that you might need to go to the hospital?”

“For my hand possibly.”

“I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to.”

“Jinnie, I just need to have a few minutes to myself.” “I’m really sorry Jagi.” He tries to hug me, but I shrink back from him, I can see the regret in his eyes.

I’m unable to respond, instead holding my hand to my chest as I walk into our bedroom. When I look at my hand I can tell that I have second degree burns and will need to go to the ER. I don’t have a car and I don’t want to ask Hyunjin. I know he feels bad, but I don’t want him to go to the ER with me because it means that they might ask questions and I can’t answer those right now. The only person I can think of to call right now to come and get me is Chan, I know he’ll ask questions but not until everything is figured out. I just need to figure out how to tell Hyunjin that I want to go by myself. I think the best way is to just straight up say that I want to go alone, and that I will let him know when I am coming home. I call Chan knowing that he’ll help, he picks up after the first ring. Only issue was that it wasn’t Chan who answered, it was Felix.

“Y/n? Chan left his phone here, he ran to the store. Do you need something?” “I um, never mind.” I was going to tell him but decided not to.

“I know that I’m not Chan and we don’t normally talk but if you need someone to talk to, I’m here.” “I was just hoping that he could take me to the hospital.”

“The hospital! Are you ok?”

“I burnt my hand while cooking, and it’s bad enough that I need medical attention.” “I don’t know when he’ll be back, but I can come get you and take you. Why can’t Hyunjin take you though?” “He’s wiped from practice, and I don’t want to make things worse for him. It’s ok Felix, I’ll figure out a way to get to the hospital.” “Nonsense, I’ll come get you. No questions asked.”

Thankfully, I am able to convince Hyunjin to let me go by myself. I tell him a white lie and tell him that it’s Chan picking me up, not Felix. I know if he knew that it was Felix, he would never let me leave. Felix must have known better than to come up to the door, instead texting that he was here and letting me come down to the car. When I get to the hospital, he waits in the car, not wanting to cause even more trouble for me. I can see the concern in his eyes when I walk out of the ER and he sees the bandage on my hand, thankfully the doctor seemed to buy my excuse that I fell and burnt my hand that way. The doctor let me know that the bandages could come off before the fashion show, so the dress that I got would still work. I know Felix is worried but he doesn’t press the issue, but I know that whatever friendship or whatever we had has changed between us.

Fashion Week:

The week before Hyunjin and I left for Milan, my bandages were able to come off. I knew that he felt bad, he had never gotten physical with me before and the logical part of me knew that I should have left him but the emotional part of me said that he’d never do it again. Ever since he’s been super sweet and caring, spending every night at the apartment with me, being at my every beck and call.

The first night that we were in Milan, he took me out to dinner and treated me as if I was his whole world. He apologized every morning and night for what happened, I believe that he’s sorry and I believe that he won't do it again. He loves me and I love him, I know that we’ll be able to make things work, I know he won’t let it happen again.

The night that we have the event, I am afraid that I’ll embarrass him because I won’t look as good as I should for him. I tried to make sure that my outfit matched his outfit, but it still seemed off. He seemed to be off the entire day while we were getting ready, he seemed short with me, almost annoyed that I was having to go with him. I didn’t want him to feel like he had to take me with him, I didn’t want to embarrass him or make this event even harder for him. Before I knew it, we were having to finish getting ready and leave soon.

“Jinnie, do you think my dress looks ok? Does it match your outfit well enough?” I ask as I apply the finishing touches to my makeup.

“Yes, you look fine. We need to go if we don’t want to show up late.” He grumbled annoyed.

“I’m almost ready, I just need to apply lipstick and then I’ll be ready.” “Just hurry up.”

“Ok, I’m ready lovie.”

“Ew, don’t call me that.” he side eyes me, seemingly disgusted.

“Oh, I-I’m sorry. In the past you never cared.” “Just, try not to talk too much tonight.”

I didn’t know how to respond to that, so instead I just rushed to catch up with him and head to the venue where the show would be held and then the after party. Much to my horror when Hyunjin and I arrived at the venue, I was ushered away from him, told that I would be sitting separately from him and that I would have to find him after the show. When he invited me I thought that we would be seated together for all of the events but I couldn’t have been more wrong. When I looked to him for support, to ask him if I really had to sit alone without him, the glare that he leveled me with was one that I could never have imagined I would get from him.

“Y/n, just sit where they tell you, stop trying to make a big deal out of nothing.” “Hyunjin, it’s a big deal to me. I’m in a country that I don’t know, at an event filled with people that I don’t know. I was under the assumption that I would be with you tonight, not sat away from you.”

“Stop it, stop whining about not getting to sit with me. You’re a big girl, put on your big girl pants and deal with sitting alone. Do not embarrass me tonight, I need tonight to go well.” “I’m not trying to embarrass you Hyunjin, but would it be so hard to ask them if we could get seats together? I don’t see why we can’t?” “Stop asking, they already have the seating arrangements set. I will see you at the after party, in the meantime try not to embarrass me.”

“Hyunjin-” I begin but he cuts me off with a glare, one that sends a cold chill down my spine. It reminds me of that night, for once I know to listen to my gut.

With him being sat away from me, I know that he’ll be more focused on the show rather than worrying about me. With how he looked at me tonight, I know that I need to leave because it wasn’t a one time incident and him hurting me was bound to happen again. I found my seat, in the back of the open showroom, which thankfully gave me the opportunity to order myself an uber and get myself back to the hotel. I didn’t know where I was going to go when I got back to Soule because technically the apartment that I lived in wasn’t mine, it was one rented by Hyunjin that he had gotten for the both of us because he wanted us to live together. I knew that I shouldn’t have given up my apartment but I was so in love with him that I thought he was my forever and that I wouldn’t need it anymore.

When my uber arrived, I quickly and quietly snuck out of the venue and as soon as it was clear I ran to the uber. The uber driver gives me a questioning look but I don’t offer up any explanation and instead book a plane ticket home, I want to be gone to the airport by the time Hyunjin comes back to the hotel. I’d prefer to be on a plane back but I also know that isn’t reasonable and is wishful thinking. I know that me leaving the event like I did can cause a scandal for Hyunjin but I can’t stay and let this relationship get even more toxic, it took me this long to realize the only reason he was even being this sweet to me after the whole incident was so that I would come with him when it came time to go to the event. He had said that he was going to have a date and he didn’t want to seem dateless when the time came around.

I panicked when I got to the hotel, packing up everything that I had brought with me and bought the earliest ticket home. Not caring which airline it was with, what section of the plane it was in and what time I would be getting back, I just knew that I needed to be gone before he got back otherwise I could actually be in serious danger. I didn’t want to worry Chan by off-loading all of my issues onto him, but I also had nowhere to stay. I didn’t know what to do, I had never been in this situation before. I did the only thing that I could think of, I called Felix, surprisingly he picked up after the first ring.

“Y/n? Are you ok?”

“No, I’m not. I’m flying back to Soule tonight but I need someone to pick me up from the airport. And then for that someone to help me find a hotel.” “Aren’t you supposed to be in Milan with Hyunjin for another week?” “It’s a lot to explain, I promise I can explain it all later but will you please pick me up?”

“Yeah of course, that shouldn’t have even been a question. I know we don’t talk much but I’ll always be here for you if you need me.” “Thank you Felix, you are a lifesaver right now. Now I just need to figure out a living situation.” “Don’t worry about that, you can stay with Seungmin and I or with Chan and I.N.” “Are you sure? I really don’t want to impose on anyone and I don’t want to cause any problems between the group and Hyunjin.”

“We all know how to be professional, whatever happened between you and Hyunjin is between the two of you. If you want us to know, then we will but if you don’t then we won't.” “Thank you, for being so understanding about all of this.”

“Of course, text me your flight details and I’ll be there to pick you up, ok?” “Ok, again thank you Felix.”

With everything set, I know that Felix and the rest of the boys will help me in any way that they can, I really don’t want to come between them and Hyunjin but I can’t help it if they decide to do this on their own. I don’t even want to think about what will happen when Hyunjin realizes that I’m no longer at the event, hell even in the country.

The next morning:

The flight back to Soule gave me the chance to think through things and figure out what I needed to do. I didn’t want to take advantage of the boys but I also couldn’t afford to stay at a hotel for very long, and finding a new place to live would be difficult, especially with the fact that I don’t make that much at my current job. I always wanted to find another job but Hyunjin never wanted me to because I only worked with women. The more I look back on our relationship, the more I realize that it was actually extremely unhealthy and the only reason that he even introduced me to the guys is because Chan accidentally caught us on a date, and when he had asked who I was I had answered before Hyunjin could. Hyunjin never had the intention of telling the guys about our relationship, his hand was forced in the whole matter.

When I finally landed I called Felix, figuring out where he was in the airport but before I could even ask, I felt a tap on my shoulder and when I turned around he was there. He was there, with a soft smile, looking like the sunshine person that everyone always describes him as. I didn’t think I would feel as much relief as I did when I saw him, but I could feel the tears forming and I didn’t know if I would be able to stop them before they fell. Felix didn’t give me the chance to, he gently pulled me into a hug. I didn’t know how badly I needed that hug until I was wrapping my arms around his waist, sobbing quietly into his chest. He tightened his arms around me, not letting go until he felt my arms drop from around him.

“Are you ready to head out?” Felix asks, taking my backpack from me.

“Yes, but I need to go to the apartment. I need to get my stuff out, I don’t want to risk trying to get it at a later date and then he be there.”

“Ok, I’ll take you. I’ll help you pack up your stuff, will you tell me what happened? Why you left Milan so suddenly?”

“Y-yes, I’ll tell you in the car. If that’s ok?”

“Of course that’s ok.”

We head to baggage claim and grab my suitcase, I try to take it from Felix after he had pulled it off for me but he doesn’t let me. He doesn’t let me carry my backpack and he won’t let me drag my suitcase, he kindly forces me to walk next to him. When Hyunjin and I came, he had people who were carrying his stuff, he didn’t even offer to carry my stuff. The more I look at Felix, the more I focus on him, the more I notice these little differences between the two men. A guilty part of me wonders why I couldn’t have met Felix first. When I had first met Hyunjin, he was so sweet and caring, we had shared an art class together and had bonded over the fact that we both loved art. The first year of our relationship was perfect, but after we had moved in together and he realized that I more than likely wouldn’t go anywhere, his whole demeanor and personality changed. No longer was he the sweet and caring guy, but an angry and anxious man who ended up taking those feelings out on me more often than not. No matter how hard I tried to be good for him, he always found a reason to be upset with me. It wasn’t until the cooking incident that he had gotten physical with me, but he was very verbally abusive towards me and would be passive aggressive towards me like he was last night. When we got to the car, I went to open my own door but before I could Felix was there, pulling it open for me, giving me a hand in case I needed help lowering myself into his car. Once I was in, he quickly rushed around to the other side, getting in himself and before I knew it, we were starting the drive back to the apartment that I once shared with Hyunjin.

“Are you ok, to tell me what happened? Why you came back so soon?” “Yes, just promise that you’ll wait until I finish explaining?”

“Of course, take your time.”

“Thank you, seriously.” “Any time y/n, any time.” “It wasn’t a cooking incident.”

“What wasn’t?”

“How I burned my hand, I didn’t burn it because I slipped. I did burn it while cooking but slipping was not the reason why.”

“Ok?”

“Hyunjin had come home angry that night, I don’t remember why exactly. I don’t remember if something had gone wrong at the studio or if I had said something but we started arguing, and I expected him to corner me like he normally did. But he grabbed my hair, yanking it back. He was super angry and it scared me, I tried to pry him off but he wouldn’t let go. Finally he got tired of arguing and he shoved me, but it happened to be in the direction of the stove. I tried to catch myself but I ended up grabbing the pan I had been using and it tipped over, spilling on me. That’s why I had such a bad burn on my hand, and burns on other parts of my body.” When I finished with that part, I could tell that Felix was angry but he did his best to contain the anger.

“Y/n, is this the first time that he was physical with you?” “Yes, it was. He had been verbally abusive for the better part of six months but I had rose colored glasses on.”

“Did he hurt you again? Is that why you came back early?”

“Not physically, he failed to mention that during the fashion show I wouldn’t be seated with him. And when I had asked if we could try to get me to sit next to him, he told me that I was being difficult and that I was embarrassing him. He told me to sit where I was told to and that he would see me at the after party.” “He seriously did that? Just left you to sit by yourself?”

“Yep, said that I was a big girl and could handle sitting by myself for the length of the show. When I tried to argue with him about it, he leveled me with a glare that actually scared me, made me nervous to even wait to see him during the after party.” “I don’t want to speak badly of him but it seems like you made the right choice in leaving, after what you told me, the whole situation seems like a bad situation.” “I think things could have gone very differently if I stayed, he knows by now that I’m gone. I’m honestly surprised that I didn’t get any texts from him after the show asking where I was. But maybe he was too preoccupied to even worry about where I was.” “Y/n, that is wrong on so many levels. If my date wasn’t sat with me at an event and then I couldn’t find her after, I would be losing my mind until I found her. Has he even texted you, asking where you are when he saw that you weren’t at the hotel and that your stuff was gone?” “Umm, I think he’s texted me like once.” “What did the text say, if you don’t mind me asking?” “Just wondering where I was, when I was coming back. It’s like he didn’t even realize that my stuff was gone.” “I’m so sorry that you have to go through this y/n, you don’t deserve it.” “It’s ok Felix, none of this is your fault. You have nothing to be sorry for.” “But I actually do. I was the one who pushed him to go to that art class, I was the one who pushed him to ask you out when he was too nervous to do so.” “Lixie, you had no way of knowing that any of this would have happened.” It’s not until he doesn’t respond that I realize what I had just called him. “Oh my god, Felix. I am so sorry. The nickname just kind of slipped out.” “Y/n, it’s ok. It just caught me off guard, I don’t mind if you call me that. Coming from you, I actually kind of like it.” “I’ll keep that in mind.”

The rest of the drive to the apartment is silent, both of us thinking but also just enjoying the music. As I look out the window, I can’t help but think about how different my life is from what I thought it was going to be just a few days ago. As I think about it, this is the first time in a long time that I’m not nervous about going back to the apartment. The realization that it’s because Hyunjin won’t be there hits me, I didn’t realize how much he scared me until I took that leap to end things with him, to leave him. The thought also hits me that I haven’t actually officially ended my relationship with him, I’m technically still his girlfriend until I officially end things. Just because I ran doesn’t mean he’ll take that as I’m breaking up with him. I can’t do it in person, I won’t be able to handle it, I’m too nervous about what he might try if I did do it in person.

I’m too into my head to realize that we had arrived at the apartment until Felix is calling out my name, trying to get my attention. I don’t know what to think of all of this, and I think that Felix is able to tell that. He doesn’t try to rush me into going inside, instead he just sits there, a supportive spirit until I’m ready to go inside.

“Ok, I think that I’m ready.” “Take your time.” “Thank you Felix, I truly do not know what I would have done without your help.” “I want to warn you, Seungmin and Chan are on their way to help. They don’t know why, they won’t know why unless you tell them.”

“Felix…”

“I just wanted to make sure that we are able to get all of your stuff. The more hands the better. When I called, I told them to help, no questions asked. What information they get is up to you.” “You promise they won’t ask any questions?” “I promise, and if they for some reason do. Send them to me.”

“Ok.”

We both get out of the car, I try to open my own door again but he rushes around opening it before I get the chance. He has a steady hand on my lower back, walking with me up to the apartment. When we get up to the apartment, I hesitate almost as if I’m not ready to take this step, ready to say goodbye to this part of my life.

“We don’t have to do this tonight if you aren’t ready.”

“No, no. I need to do this, I can’t risk Hyunjin being home.”

“Do you want me to open the door?” “Do you mind?” “Not at all.”

He takes the key from my hand, unlocking the door and pushing it open. I never realized how lifeless and cold the apartment always felt. There were no personal touches from myself in the living room, Hyunjin always insisted that his interior decor taste was better than mine and that I could decorate the bedroom. That didn’t leave me much to do anyways, I think now it had more to do with when the guys initially came over, he didn’t want them to realize he had a girlfriend. Most of my belongings were in the bedroom anyways, everything else I owned from my old apartment was in a storage unit that Hyunjin didn’t know about, he thought that I had sold whatever couldn’t fit into the bedroom on my side.

Soon Chan and Seungmin arrive, ready to help in whatever way they could. They didn’t ask any questions, which I was extremely thankful for. I really didn’t want to have to tell the whole story twice, I knew they had their questions but I didn’t know how to tell them. I knew that if I gave Felix the ok, he would tell them.

“Felix, come here real quick. Please?” “Yeah. What’s up?” He stops folding some of the shirts I had left hung up in the closet.

“I know that Chan and Seungmin have questions. I can’t go through the story again, but if they are helping they deserve to know why. You can tell them.” “Are you sure?” “Yes.”

“Alright, I’ll let them know.”

He walks away after giving me a soft smile, I go back into the bedroom and continue to put my clothes into my suitcases. I can hear Felix explaining the whole situation to them, they don’t ask any questions until he is finished explaining everything. I try to zone out what they are saying, not wanting to think about everything that has happened, again. I’m so in my head that I don’t hear anyone enter the bedroom, so when I feel arms wrap around me I jump in both parts shock and fear. When I turn around I see that it’s Chan, he has a sad look on his face and seeing that look makes me break out into tears. He wraps me in his arms, and with his support I know that with whatever happens I’ll be ok. I know that I not only have Felix on my side but I also have Chan, and maybe Seungmin but he hasn’t actually said anything. Before I can ask where Seungmin is, I hear a small knock on my door, when Chan and I turn we both see that Seungmin is standing there looking sheepish. I wave him over, he slowly walks over. I can tell that he’s hesitant to do anything so I make the decision for him and give him a quick hug, he eagerly returns the hug.

Back at Felix and Seungmin’s Dorm:

With the help of the three boys, we were able to pack up everything that I could think of that I owned that was in that apartment. I didn’t know why they brought me here after I insisted that they take me to a hotel. Felix refused, saying that they weren’t going to let me stay at a hotel. They would rather I stay at the dorms with them where they knew I was safe and wouldn’t have to worry about me confronting Hyunjin alone should he come looking for me.

I had no idea where I would be sleeping while I stayed with them, since there were only two rooms, meaning there were only two beds. When I got there, trying to figure out where to put my stuff went surprisingly better than I thought because Felix just carried it all into his room, taking away the question of where I would sleep. I didn’t want to kick him out of his own bed but he insisted that I take his bed, he’d either take the couch or find a blow up mattress of sorts.

“Felix, I really don’t want to kick you out of your bed.” “Nonsense, you wouldn’t be kicking me out. Especially since I offered.” “Felix, I can just sleep on the couch. It’s fine.” “Nonsense. You are not sleeping on the couch.”

Seungmin walks into the room carrying a sleeping mattress for Felix. He doesn’t say anything as he hands it over, I can tell that he’s tired and ready to go to bed himself. Felix bids Seungmin goodnight before turning back towards me. I can tell that Felix is also tired but he wants to make sure that I am comfortable before going to bed himself.

“Felix, I know you have the mattress. But where will you be sleeping?” “I was just planning on sleeping in the living room.” “I can’t kick you out of your bed and your room. And if I’m being honest I’d be more comfortable with you in the room. I don’t think that Hyunjin will be back anytime soon but a part of me is scared that he will be and I don’t want to be trapped in a room by myself.” “Y/n, you don’t owe an explanation. Of course I can stay in here on the floor. I want you to be as comfortable as possible while you are staying here, ok?” “Ok, again thank you Felix. I know that this is a lot to ask of you.” “It’s never too much to ask of me, I’d gladly help you.”

I can’t think of anything to say to him so I just walk up to him, instead giving him a hug. He immediately hugs me back, wrapping his arms tightly around me and pushing my head into him, trying his best to bring me comfort. Whenever I was upset, Hyunjin always made it seem like it was a burden to comfort me, to be there for me but here’s Felix, someone who barely knows me, who’s doing everything he can to make sure that I am comforted and supported even when he doesn’t need to.

Two Weeks Later:

I had been living with Felix and Seungmin now for two weeks. Hyunjin was supposed to be coming back within the next few days. I was scared that he was going to be angry, but I had barely heard anything from him while he was away and if I’m being honest that scared me even more. I didn’t know what he was thinking, how he was feeling, or if he would try anything when he saw that all of my things were out of the apartment.

I was trying to take a nap, when I realized that I had left one very important thing at the apartment that I once shared with Hyunjin. It was small and might seem insignificant to others but to me it was irreplaceable because it was given to me by a family member that was no longer living. I knew that I needed to get it but all of the boys were busy and I didn’t want to bother them. I didn’t think that Hyunjin would be back until tomorrow or the next day at least.

When I got there, I could tell that I was wrong, Hyunjin had come home early. I knew that I should have turned around and waited until either Seugnmin, Chan or Felix were available to come with me to get the stuffed animal but I was impatient and didn’t want to wait. I slowly pushed open the front door, finding Hyunjin bent over the kitchen counter reading the breakup note that I had left for him. I could tell by the way that his posture stiffened that he realized what it was and what had happened. When he heard the front door close softly he whipped around, the glare and anger in his eyes made my heart drop. I tried to turn around and leave but before I could, he was grabbing me by the hair and dragging me further into the apartment.

Hyunjin angrily threw me onto the couch, I tried to catch myself but wasn’t able to and ended up falling onto the floor. I tried to scramble away from him but he was on top of me before I could, his hands around my neck choking me.

“Hyunjin, stop. I can’t breathe.” I gasped the best I could with his hands on my neck.

“You think that you get to embarrass me by leaving with no explanation, and then break up with me?”

“Hyunjin, you're hurting me.” “Shut up, just shut up. You don’t get to decide when we are done, only I get to decide.” I try to fight against him but he still has the upper hand on me.

“Hyune. You are hurting me, I can’t breathe.” “Do you really think that I care about that right now?” “I-I’m sorry. I’ll come back, I’ll move back. Just please stop.” I whisper out, struggling. Tears fall from my eyes now, black dots crowd the corners of my vision.

“No, no you don’t get to come back on your word. I never want to see you again. Do I make myself clear, if I see you again I can’t guarantee that I won’t end your life. You useless whore.” He spits at me, spitting in my face in the process.

He pulls his hands away from my neck, getting off of me. As soon as he’s off of me, I scramble away from him, scared that if I don’t he will go back on his word and try to kill me again. It’s almost like a light switched in him when he notices that I already have bruises forming on my neck. He tries to get closer to me but I scramble back even further from him. I can see the remorse and guilt in his eyes, I can tell that he wants to say something but doesn’t know what to say. He looks disgusted in himself, by what he just did.

“Oh god. Oh god, what did I do?” He almost seems to ask himself.

“Y-you need help.” I cough out “Y-you’re right I do. Y/n, I am begging you, please call the cops. I don’t want to accidentally hurt you again. God I nearly killed you just now.” I don’t question him and rush for my phone, calling the police.

When everything is done, the police ask if I want to press charges against Hyunjin but I don’t. I know that he’s sick, he wouldn’t have had me call the police on him if he wasn’t. They decide that he needs to be monitored for a while, get onto meds that will help with these different episodes that he’s been having. As they wheel him out on the stretcher to take him to the hospital, he has them stop so that he can express his remorse one last time. When he’s gone the police officer asks if there is anyone that they can call for me, the first person that I can think of was Felix. I didn’t even hesitate when I gave them his contact information, I knew that I needed his support. I wouldn’t be ok until he was here with me, throughout the last two weeks he has been my rock, my safe place. I won’t feel safe until Felix is here with me, protecting me. The officer waits with me until Felix bursts through the doors, when he sees me and my current state he rushes over to me, pulling me into him. When the officer confirms that Felix is who he says he is, he leaves.

“Why didn’t you call me? I would have come with you.” Felix grabs my face gently, wiping my tears.

“I didn’t think that he would be home, he was supposed to come back tomorrow.” “That doesn’t matter. No matter what y/n I would have always gone with you.” “I-I��m sorry. I didn’t want to bother you, or the others.” “I beg you, bother me. I don’t want to get a call from the police like that ever again.” “I-I’m sorry, can we just go home now?”

“Of course.”

Felix helps me down to his car, making sure I’m comfortably in the car before he rushes around to the other side and gets in himself. The drive to his dorm is silent, music playing in the background. It’s like neither of us know what to say to the other, I truly didn’t mean to scare him and I didn’t think Hyunjin would be back this soon but I now can see how that was poor thinking with everything that had happened.

When we get to the apartment, I’m tired and just want to nap. I can tell that Felix is still worried about me and I don’t want to cause him even more worry. He walks with me into his bedroom, ready to make sure that I can settle comfortably into the bed before he goes out into the living room. When I lie down, I realize that I don’t want to be alone, before Felix can leave I grab onto his hand.

“Is everything ok?” Felix questions, looking down at where I’m holding his hand.

“C-can you stay, just until I fall asleep? C-can you please h-hold me?”

“O-of course.” He almost hesitates but still motions for me to move over, I comply.

He climbs into the bed next to me, pulling me into him. I burrow my face into his neck, letting myself find comfort in his warmth, in his presence that has been a saving grace these last two weeks. He buries his face into my hair, pulling me into him even more, almost as if he needed this just as much as I did. Neither of us said anything, instead basicking in the comfort that we brought each other. I expected him to leave after I fell asleep but when I woke up a short while later, he was still there, holding me just as tight as when we fell asleep. I didn’t say or do anything, instead deciding to go back to sleep.

Six Months Later:

Much to my dismay and argument, Felix and Seungmin wouldn’t let me look for a new place to live. Insisting that the current living arrangement worked just fine, that there didn’t need to be any changes. Anytime that I tried to bring up the subject of moving out, they would find a way to change the subject and would act like it never happened. I didn’t want to keep freeloading off of them, I felt bad, feeling like I was using them. They constantly claimed that I wasn’t using them, that the fact that I would cook and clean for them, because let's face it, anytime these two tried to cook it was always a disaster, was enough for them.

To my surprise, a month ago Felix had invited me as his plus one to a Louis Vuitton event that he had to go to. I said yes, but I was super hesitant and nervous to go especially after what had happened the last time I had to go to an event like this. He promised me that it wouldn’t be like that this time, that he would be by my side the entire time. The second reason I was hesitant to go was because over the last six months of living with him and Seungmin, I had grown to like Felix and his sunshine personality. He kept his own emotions under check so well that I honestly couldn’t tell whether or not he felt the same, and I couldn’t just outright ask him.

Hyunjin had come back a month ago, he had been diagnosed with Bi-polar disorder. At first things had been extremely awkward within the group after they had heard about what happened, they needed to know since he was going to have to go on hiatus. I thought that when he came back I wouldn’t be ok being around him but when the others were around I was actually ok, I could handle seeing him. He knew that the relationship that we had was over, and he was ok with that. I think on a subconscious level he could see the relationship forming between Felix and I, and he knew that it would be a better fit than him and I. He was a silent supporter of whatever was happening between Felix and I.

To make me feel more comfortable about going with him to the event, Felix took me shopping for a new dress. One by the brand that he was an ambassador for, he wanted me to get the dress first so that his stylists could match his outfit to it. He had thought this whole night out so well that I couldn’t even argue that it was going to be fun, and the dress was absolutely stunning. It was a white floor length gown with a vee neck cut, and when I saw how Felix matched himself to it, I couldn’t help but feel special. He made sure that I felt included and felt like this was important that I felt comfortable with him at all times at the event.

Night of Event:

When we arrived at the event, I expected Felix to usher me off to the side so that he could do the photo-ops but instead he gave me a questioning look, almost as if asking if it was ok to be photographed with me. When I nodded to him that I was ok, he pulled me into him and stood in front of the cameras. I could tell that he was in his element and he was happy, happy to be here and happy to have me here with him. I smiled for the cameras, glad that he didn’t want me off to the side, rather right next to him. The more he made sure I was ok, the more I fell for him. I wasn’t sure how much longer I would be able to keep my feelings for him a secret.

When we got inside the event, he kept his hand on my waist, keeping me close to him. I was glad to have him there as a solid rock for me, if I had to be put into this situation again I wanted the memory to be a good one and not one like what had happened before. Everytime we stopped to talk to someone, he would look down at me smiling softly before continuing the conversation. I could feel my heart beating wildly in my chest, I couldn’t help the blush that was rising up my cheeks. If he noticed he didn’t say anything, rather he just pulled me into him even more as he talked to whoever had caught his attention at that moment. When they started announcing that the fashion show would start soon, I got nervous and scared that I would have to sit away from him but he tightened his grip on my waist and led me to the front row chairs that he had been assigned.

I thought that we would go to the after party when the show ended but he instead led me outside and down the steps towards the beach that he had seen me eyeing since we arrived. I was glad to be alone and away from prying eyes, even if it was just for a little while. I didn’t pay attention to the way that Felix looked at me, rather focusing on the ocean and the feel of the sand between my toes and the water flowing over my feet. I could feel Felix come stand next to me, if I had turned to look at him I would have noticed that he wasn’t looking out at the ocean but rather at me, with a look of pure love and adoration.

“Felix.” I say softly as I turn towards him.

“Hmm.” “I-I need to tell you something.” “What is it? You can tell me anything.” I look at him, taking a deep breath before I continue.

“I love you. I know it hasn’t been that long since Hyunjin but you have been my rock and safe place through it all and I honestly don’t know what I would have done without your support.” “Y/n, I love you too. I didn’t want to push you or make you uncomfortable so I always kept it to myself. Even before you dated Hyunjin.” “We really are fools in love.” I say looking at him.

“Yes, yes we are.” He grabs my waist, pulling me into him. I can feel his hands grab my face gently. He looks into my eyes.

“F-felix, c-can you k-kiss me?”

“I thought you’d never ask.” He says softly while leaning into me.

When Felix presses his lips onto mine, it’s not like what the movies describe. The hundreds of fireworks, or anything like that. The feeling of his lips on mine is like coming home on a cold night to a warm home, the perfect temp of hot cocoa, everything bright and sunny. It felt perfect, and I never wanted to stop. His hands moved from my face to in my hair and on my waist, pulling me into him even more. My arms wrapped around his neck as he deepened the kiss, I never wanted this feeling to end but I knew that both of us needed air and one of us had to pull away and I honestly don’t think that Felix was going to.

“That was the best kiss I have ever had.” Felix mumbled, pressing his lips to mine again in a short kiss.

“It was perfect.” “We should probably head back, before they send out a search party.” He jokes as he grabs my hand. Slowly leading me back to the steps up to the building where the after party was held.

As we walked hand in hand into the after party, I couldn’t keep the grin off my face and honestly neither could Felix. When one of his friends that I didn’t know walked up to us, I expected him to pull his hand away but instead he tightened his grip and found a way to include me into the conversation. When his friend asked who I was, I expected Felix to say that I was just a friend, something that Hyunjin would have done but instead he looked down at me and smiled before responding that I was his girlfriend. I knew Felix was different, but every time he proves it and it still surprises me.

Epilogue:

I knew that at some point we would have to tell the other boys that we were dating but both Felix and I agreed that we wanted to keep it to ourselves just for a little while longer. He still insisted that I live with him and Seungmin and I finally relented but my only stipulation was that he no longer slept on the floor but rather in the bed with me. He agreed without any hesitation, claiming that he could get unlimited cuddles from now on, but I think we both knew that his back was killing him from sleeping on the floor for so long.

We decided that we would tell the boys at one of their dance practices, later down the road when we were able to come up with a way to tell them that wouldn’t upset Hyunjin. But until then, we just focused on each other and the comfort that we got from each other.

I knew that Felix had an early morning, he knew that he had an early morning but neither of us wanted to let the other go when we heard his alarm going off. He planted kisses all over my face before coming down to my lips, I could get high off of his kisses. He gently pushed me onto my back, placing himself above me as he continued to kiss me. I knew that this was headed into dangerous territory and if it didn’t stop soon he would be late to practice.

“Lixie, you have to get ready for practice.”

“Come with me.” “What?” “Come with me to practice. I don’t want to hide, I want to openly love you.” “A-are you sure? Seungmin is the only one who knows and you know how he reacted.” “I’m sure, I want the others to know. Hell, I want the world to know that you are my girlfriend.” “You want to announce our relationship not only to the boys but also to Stay?” “Yes, I want to share my love for you with them.” “If you are sure, then so am I. I know that as long as I am with you, I’ll be ok.” “Then it’s settled, we’ll tell the boys and then I’ll speak with the media team to come up with a way to announce our relationship to Stay.”

“Sounds perfect.” I kissed him again.

He kissed me back with just as much fervor, I knew that he was going to be late today. Or at least that’s what I thought until the door burst open and Seungmin rushed in, hand over his eyes as he blindly reached for Felix. I could feel Felix being tugged off of me, I let out a small laugh at the sight of my poor boyfriend getting dragged away by his younger roommate.

“Sorry y/nnie, just following Channie Hyungs orders.” “It’s fine Minnie, I’m coming with you guys anyways.” “You are?” “Yes, Felix wants to tell the boys and Stay about our relationship.” “Sweet!.”

Seeing the excitement in Seungmin’s eyes at the prospect of Felix and I’s relationship not only becoming public but also being announced to the boys, gave me hope that everything in the long run would be ok. The look that Felix gave me, also told me that everything in the long run would be ok.

#lee felix x y/n #lee yongbok x reader #lee felix fluff #stray kids imagines #stray kids oneshots #lee felix #stray kids fluff

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aboutcustardcreams · 2 days ago

Text

It's not that easy

Summary: Nicky remembers meeting a woman named Rio, and you feel on cloud nine at the possibility of the four of you finally becoming the family you were always meant to be. But Agatha has doubts. She wants this just as much as you do, but she isn’t sure that wish will be granted that easily.

a/n: I'm sorry, sooooo sorry for the slow updates- I'm studying because at the end of the month I'll be attending a public competition and I'm doing by best to pass it.

Hope you enjoy the chapter :3 Have I proofread? Of course not, hihi! Bye for now!

previous chapter

Tears welled up in your eyes as you gazed tenderly at your son. Your hands cupped his cheeks and the pads of your fingers grazed his newly warm skin.

“You’re back– you’re safe,” you breathed out, with a watery, yet sincere smile. You could barely stifle back a sob the moment he mouthed ‘mama’ to you, then ‘mom’ to Agatha, with his tiny precious voice you had missed like air.

Agatha’s lips cracked into a weak smile as she mouthed her gratitude to you over and over. In response a confused crease formed on your forehead, because honestly, whatever was she thanking you for? Nicky was your son, too. Of course, you’d try anything in your power to bring him back to you.

She pulled the boy in, her arms wrapped tightly around his middle, her chin rested atop his head as she inhaled deeply.

You moved a strand of hair from your face and looked closely at the scene unfolding before you. Your chest filled with a pleasant warmth, that helped ease the slight shivering of your body, perhaps given by the exhaustion that was catching up with you.

“Mom, you’re squishing me–”

You chuckled quietly at his small whine.

Her hands glided up from his hips to his cheeks as she pulled away. “Sorry, I’m sorry… I just–” She replied in a stutter.

Nicky tilted his head, leaning into his mom’s cuddle. He knew what she was trying to say, so he helped out, with a smile. “I’m happy to see you too, mom.”

She froze. You did too, and your heart ached for him. The possibility that he had, after all, been aware of everything, turned into a certainty. Nicky knew he died. He knew to have crossed over, only to be brought back shortly after. Swallowing a thick lump inside your throat, you locked eyes with Agatha, her jaw set in both guilt and sadness. You inhaled a shaky breath, trying to put it together, for Agatha and for him. He was there, he was alive.

You leaned over, lips a few millimeters from his ear as you whispered, “haven’t I been missed?”

He giggled, when your voice tickled his skin. That sound alone was enough for Agatha’s expression to shift completely, turn calm again, relieved.

“Of course mama!”

Your head lolled to the side as you hummed, “Um, and how much are we talking here?”

“This much!” He squealed as he turned around. You barely had the time to open your arms when he threw himself into your embrace. You caught him with an ‘oof’ as your legs flew up and you rolled on your back, making sure your arms were wrapped around him protectively.

Agatha sniffled amusedly. “Careful, you two–” She chided, wiping a single tear with her finger.

Burying your face in his hair, you let your nostrils fill up with his scent. You inhaled and exhaled. He was there. Against all odds and despite the warnings you received. Nicky was alive. You felt his magic, still raw and buried inside him, waiting to blossom at the right time. It brought a sense of pride within you, the thought that someday he’d become a great witch.

“Mama?” His hands moved from your neck, down to the fabric of your garment at your hips.

You pulled yourself up, with Nicky still secured in your lap, “yeah?”

“You saved me, didn’t you?”

Your lips curled upwards as you locked eyes with Agatha for a brief moment. You caught the quivering of her chin as she nodded her head, swallowing those salty tears that kept falling on her lips.

“I s’pose, I did, my love,” you muttered, reaching out to comb his hair.

His eyes twinkled with gratitude, as he pressed his head against your chest one more time, “I knew it was you.”

You sniffled, then pursed your lips to the side of your cheek. Your arms tightened around him once more, making you feel as if you were holding your own life in your hands. “I didn’t do it all by myself, though,” you continued in a whisper, “I couldn’t have done it without your mother.”

Agatha inched closer until she was right beside you and your boy. She hummed, a sound between a light scoff and a chuckle. Of course you’d give her the credit for what you did. With extreme gentleness, she cupped the back of your head and pulled you closer, before pressing a kiss upon your forehead. Her brows furrowed, as she lingered, noticing you were a bit warm.

You sensed her worry even before pulling away, but didn’t give her the chance to indulge in her concerns.

“How are you feeling?” You asked Nicky.

Agatha sighed, she knew what you were doing and for now she let it drop.

“I feel fine,” he said with a shrug. No more coughing– nor that bothersome tickle in the back of his throat. No pressure in his chest whatsoever. None of that anymore.

“Like really really fine.”

Your fingers traced his hairline and forehead. Beautiful hazel eyes bored into yours and in that moment you sensed he had other things to tell you. You playfully nipped at his nose, “Oh, I know that look of yours–” you teased, and Agatha’s brow shot up in curiosity. “Is there something you’re not telling us?”

He looked conflicted as he started fidgeting, “No, not really mom, I mean– I was going to tell you now,” he replied, though by the sound of his voice you caught a pinch of insecurity. Agatha placed a hand upon his shoulder. “It’s okay– we’re not mad or anything. We’re here for you, Nicky. You can tell us anything.”

“Always,” you added sincerely.

“I know, moms–” he smiled, finally seeming to have achieved newfound confidence. “I just– I have memories of a woman. It’s all coming back now in bits and pieces.”

Agataha held her breath, eyes widening a bit, quickly assuming who he was talking about.

A lump formed in your throat, and you did your best to swallow it down. “Yeah?” Your eyes flickering back to Agatha, whose trembling hands remained on his shoulder. “What do you remember?”

“She umm, she used to visit me… pretty often. I don’t know how it happened, I still don’t– she wouldn’t tell me that. But it was always in a forest, pretty much like this but… different, prettier and quieter, with no one else around,” your thumbs stroked his palms encouragingly as he told the tale. “I would feel fine, just like I am now, and we would talk a lot, mostly about me– she loved listening to whatever I had to say to her–” He recalled with a sweet smile tugging at his lips. He appeared serene and that was all you needed. All you ever needed.

Rio was good for him, she had always been. How could she not be? She was his mother, too.

“She seems nice,” you let your comment slip with ease.

“She was– is,” he scrunched up his nose at the mistake.

Agatha leaned over, the pads of her fingers came up to cradle the boy’s face, “where’s this place you’re referring to, my love?”

He hummed in thought, “I don’t know—” he began. “She said it was safe, and I just believed her. You and mama were never there with us,” he added, making you and Agatha feel weird in your stomachs. “But it’s okay because she was kind. And funny,” he added with a giggle. “She said the funniest things.”

A quiet, moved chuckle bubbled out of you, because of course Rio would be the fun parent among the three of you. That was just so her. And oh, how you wished you could see it. To watch her take on the role that was rightfully hers as much as it was yours and Agatha’s.

Agatha’s tension mirrored your own, but when she caught the emotion flickering in your eyes, she didn’t hesitate. She reached out, fingers laced with your own.

Your lip quivered, your eyes watered. You wanted to tell him everything.

“That’s because she–” But you couldn’t. Not yet. Not like that. So for now, you swallowed it back.

“She what, mama?” Nicky asked, with that curious little voice of his.

Sniffling, you forced a better smile out of you. “She loves you like your mom and I do.” Rio needed to be the one telling him, she was his mother too. Her joy alone. Her victory. “Maybe someday, we’ll all be together, as a family.”

Nicky’s eyes widened in sheer delight.

“Would you like that?” Agatha continued. A warmth bloomed in her chest as she stroked his hair.

He nodded excitedly, briefly turning towards her. “I’d love it if you three met. So yes, can we? Can we really?”

Out of the corner of your eye, you caught the way Agatha’s expression shifted. Her lips twitched, almost as if she wanted to smile but wasn’t sure she should. Because yes—that would be the dream. The best possible future they could carve out. And she would be lying if she said she didn’t want it to work, that she didn’t long for it as much as you did. And apparently Nicky, too.

But she also worried, and sometimes she couldn’t help it.

“We can definitely try,” she said in a low murmur.

“Do you remember the woman’s name, Nicky?” You asked.

His lips slightly parted ajar and a soft ‘oh, slipped out. That alone gave you the answer you were looking for as a little crease found its way between his brows.

“No worries,” Agatha was quick to add, hating to see her boy struggling so much. “You’ve been through a lot. Give yourself time to collect your thoughts.”

Agatha was right. If you were feeling tired, you couldn’t even begin to imagine how stressful it must have been for Nicky to die and then come back to life in such a small time lapse.

“It will come back to you in a jiffy,” you reassured him.

“Kay,” he sighed, and by his focused expression you and Agatha realized he was still trying to remember her name.

Agatha rolled her eyes, ruffling his hair with a fond smile. “Why don’t you rest for a bit, hmm?”

“I’m not even tired, mom,” he shot back instantly, springing to his feet with an energy that took you by surprise. If you’d tried a move like that, you were pretty sure your vision would have been swimming with black spots. So instead, you stayed put, knees still tucked beneath you.

“Oh, would you look at that–” you mused. “Did you get super strength and super speed?”

He nodded proudly, and swelled his chest. “I think so, mama. I feel like I can run up and down the hill without breaks all day!”

Unlike him, you weren’t exactly brimming with energy, though you were certain a proper nap would set you right. Agatha, however, wasn’t as easily reassured. Now that she had confirmed Nicky was well and healthy, her attention shifted to you, her sharp eyes taking in every detail.

Without a word, she reached out, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear, her touch lingering just a second too long, as if she was trying to prove a point.

“You’re warm–” she noted, but you shrugged it off, “I’m fine, Ags. I could use a nap, though,” you admitted, because there was really no point in lying, not to Agatha.

Nicky plopped down beside you again, scooting closer until his knees bumped against yours and his fingers pressed against your cheeks. “You got the sleepy eyes, mama.”

You blinked at him, and before you could prevent it, a yawn slipped from your lips. “The sleepy eyes, huh?”

He nodded with a chuckle. “You should sleep now so later we can look for Rio together and–”

The moment the name left his lips, you gasped. Nicky, always attuned to you, mimicked your reaction with wide eyes and a startled expression, before it shifted in something different. A realization. A recognition.

“I—” he blinked, breath catching. “I remembered.”

Nodding your head, you smiled. “You did!”

Agatha, however, did not share in his delight, nor yours. She didn’t move, didn’t even seem to breathe. Her entire body went still, rigid, as if the mere sound of that name had reached inside her chest and tightened its grip around her heart, suddenly too big to be contained in her chest.

“We are gonna find her,” a promise, you made it your own mission to make you four a family. “Right, Agatha?”

Her lips parted slightly, but no words came at first. She didn’t know how to feel. Didn’t know what was the right thing to feel after everything that happened.

But when she looked at you, really looked at you, at Nicky, at the unwavering hope in both of your faces, she knew she couldn’t bring herself to be the one to dim that light.

She wouldn’t be the one to dim your hope. Not when she wanted this just as much as you did. But she would be vigilant this time, making sure nobody would attempt to harm either of you, nor her newfound inner peace.

“Yeah,” she conceded, her voice quieter than she intended, but no less certain. “We can definitely try.”

“Are you sure about this?”

“Hm?” Your eyes darted from Nicky to Agatha, and you immediately noticed the scowl on her face. Nicky was trotting a few steps ahead, the three of you were headed towards the nearest village for something to eat.

“Sure about… the supper?” You began, an eyebrow shot up confusedly. “Because yes, I am. I love you, but we need some real cooking. We are good at many things, but that–” you wiggled your fingers in support of your reasoning, “isn’t really our strong suit, is it?” An amused smirk tugged at Agatha’s lips. She couldn’t exactly say you were wrong. You were terrible at cooking. And she was even worse.

“I feel like I haven’t eaten in days–”

Agatha drew closer, brows furrowing in concern. "The ritual took quite a toll on you, huh?”

Binding your soul to another’s had been a first. You had read about it in the Darkhold long ago, back when you and Agatha were desperately searching for a way to live with Nicky without a countdown—one that didn’t involve tearing through the Multiverse to ‘steal’ a healthier version of him from another world where he was happy and loved by other versions of you. No, you wanted your Nicky, from this Universe to be by your side.

You shrugged, with a small smile. “Perhaps, but I’m all good now. Just hungry.”

The nap clearly helped you out. You looked like yourself again, and that alone should’ve been enough of a relief to Agatha, yet it wasn’t. Not completely at least. You didn’t know, but she had been awake when you took a nap earlier with Nicky. The boy had assured you both he wasn’t tired, though the moment he laid his head over your chest, he closed his eyes and fell asleep with you within minutes.

And while you slept, Agatha refused to let her eyes flutter close, refused to let her guard down. Because when she did, Nicky had slipped away from her. It had been her negligence, a lapse in attention that had cost her everything. But things were different now. Nicky was safe. Whole. It was unlikely he would slip away again, not when he was finally healthy. Not when you had made it possible for him to be—with that impossible magic of yours.

She averted her eyes and inhaled. “When I asked you if you were sure about this, I didn’t mean the supper–”

A placid smile tugged at your lips as you held out a hand towards her. “I know–” Her steps faltered, before coming to a stop. To be frank, you only pretended not to understand, because you did. A part of you was just afraid to talk about it, because you wished with all your heart to be on the same page as Agatha, but you knew that there could be a possibility you two weren’t.

“It’s about Rio, isn’t it?”

She nodded, her smile wavered at the mention of her name. That made your heart ache for her, for Rio. Perhaps, the vision you had of family was still a long way off. So annoyingly out of reach.

“I don’t know if we can trust her. Not after everything–”

Your face fell, but you tried not to show. You called out for Nicky before focusing your entire attention back on her, told him to take a short break, and to not wander off in the meantime. Luck was on your side, since there was a small stretch of water that caught Nicky’s attention. Blessed childhood.

Turning around, you took a slow step closer to Agatha. Gentle. Encouraging. “I know you’re skeptical about this, and you have all the reasons to be, but I want to believe it can work out,” you breathed out, a hand came up to cradle her cheek. “ I need to–” you added, almost desperate, in a plea. “Don’t you?”

Her nostrils flared as she bored her eyes into yours. She hesitated only for a second, but not because she didn’t want this, it was more complicated than that. “Of course I do–” she trailed, trying to mask the veil of fear darkening her eyes to no avail. She exhaled in a long shaky breath. “What if she tries to take him again? What if she comes for you? For any of us?”

Your lips pursed in a grimace as you drew closer, so close your hips brushed against hers. Your hands found her face, fingertips gliding over her skin with the softest touch, meant to ground her and reassure her. “Nicky’s thread of life is completely restored,” you assured. “It won’t be his time to go for a long, long, looooong time from now,” a pause, where your lips stretched into a smile.

Agatha wanted to believe you, put her full trust in you like she’s already done but she was scared. Something was holding her back.

“And as for me and you… she wouldn’t. I know that. I just do,” you hoped your conviction could be enough for her. But sometimes words couldn’t suffice. When she didn’t react, you playfully nudged at her arm, offering her a wink. “Come on– have I ever let you down before?”

With a slow shake of her head, she let out a slow, measured sigh and leaned in, closer, impossibly closer, hands tangling in your hair, almost possessively, almost desperately. As though keeping you close could somehow keep you safe. It was silly really, all things considered. Why? Because you were the one that in the end always kept her safe, she and Nicky.

Of course the answer to your question was no. You’ve never let her down, and you never would.

Agatha needed you, in a way that sometimes scared her. The depth of it, the ache of it—it gnawed at her, relentless and consuming. And yet, there you were, ever steady, ever certain. Always so damn optimistic, sometimes it annoyed her and yet...

She needed you to be you.

Optimistic. Courageous. Generous in ways only you could be.

“I wish I was strong like you. But I guess that’s something that cannot be taught–” She murmured, her voice barely above a whisper.

The sound of your laughter broke through and Agatha felt like falling. Her heart pounded, tickled against her ribs, filled her ears, although drowned her out in the best possible way.

“Funny,” you mused, tilting your head just so, your fingers still cradling her face. “Because to me, you’re the strong one.”

Agatha tried to object, to tell you how ridiculous what you just said was, but you didn’t let her. You couldn’t. “It’s true. I see you, Agatha. Past the walls, the surface. You’re the strongest person I’ve ever met, in the softest, most breathtaking way and that is so beautiful.” Your thumb brushed against her cheek, just in time to wipe a solitary tear that had just slipped down. “You’re so beautiful, Agatha Harkness.”

Agatha’s throat tightened. Her eyes turned red and puffy and damn you– it was your doing. A chuckle slipped from your lips, when she grumbled something under her breath, something along the lines of ‘you’re an absolute idiot.’

“Moms!” Nicky cried out. “Can we go now?”

“Hear that?” You grinned, teasingly. “Your son demands our attention.”

Her fingers brushed against your cheeks, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear, as she huffed, “I carried him for nine months only for him to act exactly like you.”

You chuckled, reaching for her hand and lacing your fingers together. “And to look exactly like her,” you added, your voice barely above a whisper, before turning to walk on again.

Her breath hitched just for a second. She swallowed, before muttering a quiet ‘yeah’ in return. “I suppose I can let it slide for now.”

“Gee, thanks,” you deadpanned, making her roll her eyes at you and your antics.

“But the conversation isn’t over,” she added, rather serious this time.

“Never entered my mind, it was,” you soothed, gently grazing the back of her hand with your thumb.

#wlw #agathario #agatha all along #agatha harkness x reader #agatha harkness x y/n #kathryn hann #kathryn hahn x reader #rio vidal #nicholas scratch #aubrey plaza #aaa

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iandarling · 23 days ago

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Ian gets so turned on by Mickey doing normal boring domestic shit

Mickey buying new toothbrushes? hot 🥵

“Guess we should vacuum or some shit here, the dust is makin’ me sneeze” Ian is unzipping his jeans before he’s done speaking

Mickey doing laundry? Incredible, outstanding, he’s down so bad 🫄

“Yo, they had a sale on peanut butter, so I stocked up” Ian is harder than ever 🫡

Mickey casually mentioning he bought a new backpack for Liam? Ian is about to propose again 👰‍♂️

“Aight’ I boiled us some eggs for dinner — wait why are you taking your shirt off?”

#ian loves domesticity #they are finally safe and secure and he loves it #mickey doing normal boring shit reminds him of that #mickey milkovich #gallavich #ian gallagher #your honour they are husbands #gallavich headcanon #my post

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daisybell-on-a-carousel · 5 months ago

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Honestly, sometimes it's not even about the Joker

#its about feeling safe and secure. to feel loved. and to feel like he can trust his family. that he even has one #he wants to trust that his family would keep him safe. to choose /him/#shelia took the ability to trust those meant to keep him safe away from him. and batman failed to give it back #shelia picked the joker over jason. she let jason die in order to try and have her own way #and certainly. ive no doubt that THAT is how jason sees that final showdown in utrh #he didn't even want batman to kill the joker himself. no. he just wanted batman to sit there and let the joker die #in his mind. it shouldn't have been hard.#because doesn't batman kill innocents everyday. with his own inaction against the joker? surely. /surely/ he'll let jason do what he needs #all he has to is -let jason kill the joker- all he has to do. is choose his son #do you think he views batman stopping him because of his morals. as batman choosing what benefits himself over jason #and the batarang. to -kill- hurt jason to achieve his own benefit #jason died that day. the slice of that batarang was just another hit of the crowbar #jason todd #aughhh. fuck it new tag #jason todd analysis #i be talking #sorry this entrie post is in the tags i like talking here more lol #makes it easier to get my thoughts out i feel

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starsofang · 6 months ago

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Simon didn’t like to hold you. He liked to be held.

At first, you didn’t understand why he’d turn his back to you in bed without saying anything. You thought you’d done something to him, or maybe he was in a bad mood. You couldn’t be any more wrong.

Simon Riley, an absolute brute of a soldier, was silently asking for you to be the big spoon. You nearly didn’t believe it when he finally brought it to your attention.

He was too embarrassed to ask you, so he’d resort to flipping on to his side and wait. And wait. Until he realized you didn’t catch the memo, even after many hopeless attempts.

In his mind, he thought being the big spoon would somehow convince you he wasn’t manly enough, as if his title in the service or his pure stature wasn’t proof enough of his masculinity.

To him, being held was a blanket of security. Where he’d always have to watch his back out on the field, both literally and metaphorically, he didn’t have to keep an eye out at all times with you. It was a chance for him to find solace in a person, and when he explained this to you, he was surprised to find you so willing.

And oh, when it happened, Simon nearly kicked himself for holding back on verbalizing it for so long.

The warmth of your arms when they wrapped around him from behind, your face buried between his shoulder blades, legs tangled in his, he thought that this was what inner peace felt like.

He was silly to think you’d ever be the one to judge him for what most deemed ‘unmasculine’. In all of his broad glory, he felt safe the moment you held him, like a child does when they feel a mother’s embrace except it was from someone he loved dearest to his heart.

And you? You found that being the big spoon was rather enjoyable when the man you’re holding was so damn comfortable to snuggle up to. It was a win-win for you both.

You just wished he wasn’t an idiot that left you wondering all those hopeless nights until the truth came out.

#angie’s rambles #i want a cuddle from my lover but i’m sick #so this is how i cope #call of duty #cod #cod x reader #simon ghost riley #simon riley x reader #simon riley #ghost cod #simon ‘ghost’ riley x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #ghost simon riley #simon ghost x reader #ghost drabble #cod ghost #ghost x reader #i love soft simon

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rafeandonlyrafe · 2 months ago

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in his corner

words: 2.7k

warnings: 18+ only, smut, boxer!rafe, established relationship, p in v sex, semi public sex, violence but not in great detail, unprotected sex, mentions of rafes anger issues

rafes head is down as you step into the locker room. it's dark and gloomy, no need for bright lights that just illuminate the blood and grime more.

the fleeting sunlight peeking in through the windows only casts light upon the dust floating in the room as you close the door behind you, causing rafe to finally look up.

his eyes shift from pure focus to something softer. “hey.” his voice is still low, slightly hoarse from not speaking most of the day.

“hey.” you move the rest of the way into the room, your footsteps sounding thunderous in the silence that always cloaks the gym before a fight, especially one like this.

“ill be safe.” you see a hint of humor in his eyes now as you roll yours. you always tell rafe to stay safe before a fight, it's become such an expectation that he beats you to it.

“do you have your gloves?” you ask, looking towards his gym bag, wanting to rifle through it to make sure rafe has everything he needs, even though you packed it for him.

“of course.” rafe smiles, wrapping his hands around the back of your thighs and pulling you closer into him, his forehead pressing against your stomach.

“you're nervous for this one.” rafe states. he doesn't need to ask, he can tell just by your energy, the way your breathing is more frantic, your eyes opened ever so slightly wider than normal.

“im not the one in the ring.” you hum, hand coming to the back of his neck, stroking over his hairline, taming it despite knowing it's only a few minutes before it's going to get messed up again, either by rafe rubbing at it or the opponent.

“i know.” rafe looks up at you, a soft smile on his face. “but ya love me.”

“mmm, unfortunately.” you joke, a smile flashing across your lips before you drop your head to press your mouths against rafe, the kiss hungry and desperate, knowing it may be your last for a while if rafe gets his lip busted open.

“okay-” rafe sighs, pulling away, restraint in his voice as his insides call to continue kissing you. “it's almost time. love you.”

“love you too.” you back away but keep your eyes locked with rafe until your back is pressed up against the door. “win for me.”

you step out, eyes flickering around his team, waiting in the hallway for you, knowing better than to interrupt your moment with rafe.

“he's ready.” you nod to rafes coach before ducking out of the way as they file into the locker room.

you can hear the noise of the crowd grow as you walk into the arena, rows of seats all facing towards the central octagon. none of the security stops you to ask for a ticket as you walk to the front, rafe has become a headliner at the boxing gym, and you a vip along with it.

you take your seat, a coveted one, right in rafes corner. you know he has supporters, and while you appreciate most of them, the female ones who fawn over him anger you every time they shout his name or try to give him their number, but his quick shut down of advances always washes away the brief resentment.

“hey y/n.” rafes coaches brother, lewis, sits next to you, your de facto personal bodyguard. you insisted you didn't need someone looking over you, but rafe was always worried about a fight starting in the crowd. it certainly wouldn't be the first one that has broken out at a boxing gym.

“hi lewis.” you tuck a piece of hair behind your ear and lean back in your seat as the prematch comes out, beginner fighters to keep all the early attendees from getting impatient while the crowd grows and seats fill.

overall, it's a professional arena. not on a pro level by any standards, but the best you can get in the area without making boxing full time. it certainly puts the smaller gyms rafe started out in to shame.

you were the one who originally suggested it. any sort of contact sport to work through some of his anger. you saw it bubbling under the surface, and you knew rafe would never do anything in your presence, even if he wanted to scream and punch a wall, he'd bottle it all in just to not scare you.

you clap as the first round comes to an end, ever the good supporter and attendee. it's part of the reason the gym likes rafe so much, he's no fuss, no personal drama, just pure fighting.

there's more rounds as you wait to see rafe, the rest of the seats being filled along with standing room in the back for anyone getting in late.

a new referee steps into the ring, a professional with years of experience who doesn't bother with the lower level fights, saving himself for the main event.

you sit up a little straighter in your seat as your eyes move to the door, a smile stretching over your cheeks as rafe steps out to applause and the thumbing base of a rap song. you applaud as well, keeping your eyes on rafe despite knowing he won't look at you, not until he gets in the ring, some sort of superstition that he's developed as he keeps his head down.

the other fighter comes out to the booming announcement of their name, a silly nickname you immediately disregard. clearly someone trying to rise the ranks and become a well known name, but you can tell just by his stature that rafe will take him down.

you breathe a little sigh of relief as rafe climbs into the ring and looks over to you, a slight smirk you're sure only you can see. he knows just as well as you do that this will be an easy day.

the official facilitates the handshake between the opponents before they're back to their corners to tape wrists and put on gloves, getting everything prepared. you keep your eyes on rafe, of course, taking in his every movement.

you feel a stirring in your stomach as he stands, tank top stretched tight across his body while his shorts are looser, allowing him to move easily around the ring.

you hear a woop coming from the back but know better than to divert your attention, rafe surging forward right when the official starts the round. he wastes no time throwing quick punches before defending, stepping to the side to miss the opponents swipes.

rafe lands a few more blows, but you don't cheer yet. you've made the mistake before of thinking he's in the clear too early.

the movement of rafes body is almost a dance, one driven by passion. his biceps bulge with every punch, swear gathering on his chest, making your mouth water as you watch.

the officials whistle to end the round makes you jump, too wrapped up in rafes looks to pay attention to the fight like you know you should.

you really do try to shift your attention back, but as the next round starts, you're quickly drawn back to watching rafes body and smooth movements.

every punch he throws makes your legs tighten further, hoping the pressing of your thighs offers you some sort of relief, but any comfort is fleeting.

your body responds for you when the fight comes to end, rising to your feet and clapping as you snap back to attention. rafe of course wins, the opponent not even getting a punch to his face other than a brief touch on his jaw that didn't even knock his mouthguard.

“i knew you'd win.” you smile and step forward as rafe comes to the ropes, leaning over to press his lips against yours.

“let me talk to the team and shower then we'll get out of here, yeah?” rafe kisses you again before leaning in to whisper into your ear. “i can tell you're turned on.”

“how'd you know?” you question as rafe shifts the car into drive, his free hand immediately coming to your thigh as he pulls out of the parking spot and onto the road.

“that you were- are turned on?” rafe smirks, keeping his eyes focused on the road ahead. “you get a look in your eyes, baby. and i can tell you want me.”

“and i have that look right now?” you hum out, turning the volume up on the radio slightly as the kid cudi song comes on.

“mhm. and it'll only intensify when i do this-” rafes hand slides upwards between your thighs. you quickly part them for him, letting out a soft moan as his fingers rub right where he knows you like it best.

“shit.” you lean back into the seat, trying to keep yourself from jumping over the center console and pouncing on rafe instantly. you pray you don't hit traffic as he presses harder on the gas pedal, ready to get home as well.

“you looked so pretty tonight cheering me on baby.” rafe pushes his fingers harder against your pants, creating tight circles. “even if you were spaced out the entire time.”

“mhm.” you hum, not even truly listening to what rafe is saying, just enjoying the tambor of his voice and the feeling growing in your stomach.

you know when rafe laughs that it's at you and your current state, but you've done far too much and been with him far too long to be embarrassed or ashamed by your lust as you let out another moan.

your eyes are glossy as you turn to look at rafe, hand gripping the wheel tightly with a clear tent in his sweatpants. you blink a few times to clear your vision as you take in his hard set jaw, tension building as he is forced to wait to get inside you.

you reach over to place your hand on rafes crotch, hoping the pressure of your hand sustains him a little longer.

“it's taking everything in me not to pull over and fuck you here in the car.” rafe says through gritted teeth.

you look out the windshield as rafe moves his hand to grip the steering wheel with both hands, needing it now that you're touching him to keep the vehicle steady. “we're almost home.” you hum out, petting your fingertips over his length, contemplating pushing his pants down and bending over the center console, but your clenching pussy needs him.

rafe pulls into the driveway at speeds he shouldn't be going inside a residential neighborhood, the car calming to a halting stop, and not even a second passes before you're out of your seats and out of the car.

rafe beats you to the front door, throwing it open for you to rush inside, locking it tight after you've entered.

you know you won't make it to the bed. you never do on nights like this. both on a high from rafe winning his fight, an easy opponent with not even a scratch to his knuckles.

rafe presses you against the wall of the hallway, his body molding against yours as his lips smash forward into a passionate kiss. you reach between your bodies immediately, knowing you're already soaking wet and ready from rafe playing with you in the car.

you push down on the hem of rafes sweatpants until rafe moves his hips and allows you to shove them down along with his underwear.

rafe lets out a sigh as your hand wraps around his length, holding his cock in your grasp as you quickly begin to stroke.

“fuck, baby.” rafe places his fist around your hand. “as much as i love you touching me like this i need to be inside you now.”

there's a desperation in his voice that makes something in your chest tighten.

you nod and release him, undoing your button and zipper to shove your pants to the ground and kick them away. rafe grabs the hem of your tshirt before you can take it off yourself, pulling it up over your head before it also joins the clothes scattered around the foyer.

rafe connects your lips back together, his hands sneaking behind your back to undo your bra before pulling the cups off, large palms quickly replacing them as he holds your breasts, giving them a gentle squeeze that has your mouth falling open in a satisfied sigh.

“bedroom, counter or right here?” rafe asks, pulling on your lip before you can answer and giving it a tug.

“right here.” you reach down and take rafes cock in your hand, giving it a stroke. “right here, right now.”

“mmm, don't have to tell me again.” rafes arms circle around you and pull you up, pinning you against the wall. your body moves so naturally like it's done a hundred times before, legs instinctively wrapping around his waist.

rafe lines up his cock with your entrance and sinks forward. your arms wrap around his shoulders and pull him in tight, mouth dropping open and eyes squeezing closed as he slowly enters you.

“oh god.” rafe groans, mouth opening as well, but to press his teeth against your skin, biting down gently so as to not actually hurt you, his tongue flicking out to taste your skin.

“fuck me rafe.” your fingertips are digging into his shoulders, trying not to pierce him with your nails as you grip onto his muscles, muscles he just used to pummel his opponent.

“fuck me hard.” you don't often ask for it hard or really give him any direction. rafe knows how to please you, but it's different today. you need his full force, everything he has left in him.

and he doesn't make you wait.

rafe pulls his cock out slowly before slamming in, forcing your ass back into the wall with a thud, your whole body shuddering as he thrusts.

you tighten your arms even more, needing your bodies to become one as he pumps his hips forward, the sound of skin meeting together spreading through the empty house.

tomorrow, you'll clean up the clothes off the floor. tomorrow, you'll make a large breakfast to replenish rafe from his fight and open every window in the house to let in light and air, but tonight, you're going to remain in the dark hallway with your legs wrapped around rafes waist.

“harder.” you beg again, even though you're not sure you can take it.

rafe complies, swinging faster as one of his hands manages to find a way between your bodies, tips of his fingers pressing against your clit. he knows he should fuck you longer, but he can build you up again for the second time in the bedroom, you've teased each other too much and he needs to feel you fall apart in his arms.

“you're so tight and warm.” rafe mumbles, burying his face in your neck as he huffs, absorbing your heart after being apart physically for too long, the cold air of the gym and locker room now being replaced with you.

“i love you.” rafe mumbles, lips against your neck as he presses a few kisses to your throat. “thank you.”

he doesn't need to say what for. you understand. for being with him, for encouraging him to try boxing, for standing by his side and knowing what's best for him even when he didn't know himself.

“i love you.” you moan out, pussy clenching around rafes cock as your high suddenly hits, back arching off the wall in pleasure only to be slammed back against it as rafe pushes as deep as he can go inside of you, the squeezing of your cunt triggering his own high as his cum spurts inside of you.

“f-fuck.” you whine, nails fully leaving marks now as you breathe deeply, chest rising and falling, pressing against rafes with every breath.

“let's go take a bath.” rafe says, his voice suddenly softer, almost like the sex was the last bit of excursion he needed to calm himself after the fight.

“okay.” you can't help but giggle.

despite your agreement, rafe doesn't pull out, his softening cock still inside of you and bodies connected.

“okay.” you repeat, pressing your lips against rafes cheek before resting your head against his, realizing what he needs in that moment. “i love you.”

you stay there, still, for minutes that stretch into what feels like hours, but you wouldn't trade it for the world.

“okay.” rafe finally responds, eyes blinking with a new clarity, any sort of anger or frustration he had before the fight now freed from inside him. “bath time, yeah?”

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