#they all pretended i didn’t say anything lol i was like whoa what the hell. is this 2011

[creaturebehavior]

me whenever i’m opening up about my gender journey with a new trans friend:

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 316: We've Had One, Yes, But What About Second Explosion

Previously on BnHA: Deku was all “[powers up like whoa because it’s time to end the fight]”, and he saved Overhaul from getting not-shot, and then smashed up Nagant’s arm with the power of his new rechargeable super knees. Nagant was all “yoooo this kid is crazy strong whaaaat, it’s like he’s some kind of protagonist or something.” Deku was all “I AM A PROTAGONIST, ACTUALLY, DO YOU WANT TO JOIN FORCES AND FIGHT BAD GUYS WITH ME?” Nagant was all “ah shit why the hell no -- ” and then AFO was all “SURPRISE” and everyone was all “?!?!?!” and AFO was all “TIME TO EXPLODE NOW” and made Nagant explode because he’s an absolute fucking dick. And then Hawks showed up, because Horikoshi just wanted to stuff as many plot points as humanly possible into a single chapter I guess.

Today on BnHA: Hawks is all “good job giving motivational shounen redemption speeches Deku but I’ll take it from here” and screams very earnestly right in Nagant’s face until she finally wakes up. Nagant is all “oh hey it’s my successor, you seem surprisingly unfucked-up from your own HPSC tenure, how did you manage that?” Hawks is all “fandom is going to love hearing this one, but basically it’s because I’m very upbeat and also I had the world’s best role model Endeavor to look up to,” and I swear this man stirs the pot on purpose, but damn it I still love him so damn much. Overhaul is all “HELLO AGAIN, JUST A REMINDER THAT, THE BOSS!!” and Deku is all “MAYBE TAKE TWO SECONDS TO REFLECT ON HOW YOU TORTURED A LITTLE GIRL,” which, thank you, lol. Nagant is all “btw AFO’s hiding in a house in the woods”, and so Deku and the gang go to the house in the woods. Video recording!AFO is all “hi I’m AFO welcome to Jackass” and blows up the house. Sometimes I wonder if this manga is just a weird dream.

I am once again reading the Bean version because I think it was actually the best out of all three translations last week. and that is surprisingly including Viz’s. “faux” is not nearly as entertaining as “knockoff”, and also I have literally no idea why Caleb thought Deku was saying the Third’s lines lol

oh hey, Endeavor’s here too! not that you’d ever be able to tell from this first panel lmao

glad you received All Might’s call, mysterious unidentified glowing smudge

oh snap he says he’s weaker in the rain. is that why AFO told Nagant to attack then?? except that as we discussed the other day, I believe that AFO fully intended for Nagant to lose the fight, so him giving her info that would give her an advantage doesn’t really fit in with that. maybe he wanted Deku to be separated from Endeavor and the rest for maximum angst, though

btw Deku’s eyes are unsurprisingly back to the new normal here

alas, the angst continues. I say, pretending like I’m not totally eating it up each and every week and writing essay after essay about it lol

anyway so apparently Hawks can’t actually fly lmao. he was just yeeting himself with style

for some reason this is the funniest fucking thing I’ve ever seen omfg. wave to Hawks, kids! say “bye, Hawks!”

j/k of course Deku is catching them. -- except???

wow so he was just running on fumes there at the end. well, good to know there is actually a limit to his shenanigans, particularly regarding this new “knockoff” 100% OFA. it will definitely not alleviate any of the discourse, but it’s good for my own peace of mind because it’s solid confirmation that he still needs his pals in order to win this thing

anyway, but on to the rest of this conversation, which is basically Deku deducing what we all deduced last week -- AFO implanted some sort of trap into Nagant when he gave her Air Walk. though I’d still like to get the actual details from AFO and/or Horikoshi, because this was particularly wild even by quirk standards lol

omgggggg

she still has a face after all!! so it’s confirmed, Horikoshi has no idea what “blowing up” actually means. we might have guessed, based on what happened to Toga in the MVA arc, and also based on everything Katsuki does ever, but shhh

so now Hawks is all “NAGANT PLEASE WAKE UP, IF I SHOUT MY NAME AT YOU WILL THAT DO THE TRICK”

this is actually kind of touching though because even though we all know (or most of us acknowledge at any rate) that Hawks is a pretty caring person, it’s rare to see him actually panic over someone’s welfare like this

oh shit Horikoshi is really doubling down on it

I wonder how much Hawks knew about what really happened between Nagant and the HPSC. regardless, he probably sees her as a kindred spirit of sorts, and I’m more than happy for Deku to pass the redemption torch onto him now that he’s on the scene. like no offense Deku but they actually know each other and stuff lol

DAMMIT NAGANT CAN’T YOU SEE HOW LOUD HE IS YELLING

apparently being freed from his HPSC shackles has finally given Hawks the space to embrace his own inner shounen protagonist. is there anything more shounen than trying to motivationally scream someone awake when they’re lying in your arms inches from death?? 100% guaranteed to work

!!! IS THIS NAGANT’S POV OMG

SO SHE IS ALIVE. THANK GOD. Horikoshi doesn’t want to meet with my emotional distress lawyer today after all

love how she’s all “just gonna stir up the weekly Hawks Discourse pot here by implying that he probably committed a lot of Atrocities just like I did, so now people can get all hopped up about that, even though there’s no evidence he’s ever killed anyone aside from that one horrible ‘damned-if-you-do...’ situation with Twice.” no one asked for your provocative speculation young lady!! trust me Nagant, our rabbles don’t need the rousing lol

but nice save there with the “so how are your eyes so untainted” well you see it’s because even when he was following the HPSC’s orders he always went to great lengths never to go against his own moral compass. which just to be clear was incredibly difficult, and led to a ton of pain and suffering on his part, because the life of a spy is basically just one impossible situation after another. but in spite of that he never stopped trying to do his best to help people. I don’t really know where this tangent came from or is leading to, lol, but anyway p.s.a. I love Hawks a lot and he’s a good kid dammit

oh shit??!?

how is the League always able to swing all these fancy forest mansions. where do they find them. how many do they have

so Deku’s dropping them -- very roughly, not sure if he was reacting to finally getting AFO’s location, or if his energy really is giving out -- and now Nagant’s saying that AFO hired other villains as well. well of course he did. gotta keep chipping away at OFA’s ninth successor little by little

now Nagant is asking Hawks how he’s able to keep making “that” face. I assume she’s again talking about the fact that he somehow didn’t let the HPSC wear down his spirit

oh my god???

thanks for stuffing this chapter to the brim with good nutritional Hawks Feels, Horikoshi. what a good. he just keeps on trudging forward undeterred no matter what bullshit comes his way. what a steadfast little guy. I WILL PROTECT YOU FROM DISCOURSE MY SWEET SUNSHINE

lmaoooo

“SPOTTED THIS DUDE JUST CHILLING OUT THERE ON THE ROOF WITH NO ARMS, SEEMED PRETTY SUS” good job Endeavor

anyway so you don’t really need me to tell you that Overhaul is immediately starting in with the “BUT THE BOSS WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO TAKE ME TO THE BOSS YOU PROMISED YOU WOULD TAKE ME TO THE BOSS” stuff again. but I will go ahead and tell you anyway. so yeah. he’s doing that

OMG YOU GUYS LOOK AT DEKU’S “of all the fucking assholes to just randomly drop in on my life once again why did it have to be you” FACE THOUGH, OMG

fun fact, if you go back to chapters 124 through 160, there was an entire story arc where Overhaul imprisoned and tortured a little girl. yeah, I know!! suuuuuuuuper evil. anyways just an interesting little anecdote for you all that’s somewhat relevant to the current situation

OMG, YES. FUCK YES, DEKU

THEN WHAT ABOUT SPARING ONE FOR HER!!! YES!!! EXACTLY!!! JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, SOMEONE GETS IT

HERE’S THE PANEL OF DEKU SAYING THE EXACT SAME THING I’M SAYING LOL

(ETA: so apparently there’s some discourse about this because some people are interpreting this as Deku saying “you should apologize to Eri”, which would obviously be a terrible idea even if Overhaul actually wanted to do that, because Eri shouldn’t ever have to see him again. however I just want to point out that there is a HUGE difference between saying “it would be nice if you could direct that feeling of regret/being sorry towards Eri as well”, vs saying “you should also apologize to her.” all Deku is doing is rightfully pointing out that Overhaul has hurt way more people than just his boss, and if he really is remorseful, then he should extend those feelings of remorse to Eri and the rest as well. it’s not a directive to take any specific action, and I’m 1000% sure no one at U.A. would let Overhaul within 100 miles of Eri ever again.

tl;dr “try feeling remorse sometime” =/= “do you want me to fly you over to U.A. right now to surprise the little girl you traumatized”, lol.)

[slings an arm around Deku’s shoulders] you’re a good kid. I like you. I don’t know if I tell you that enough, but it’s true

meanwhile here is Overhaul’s “spare... a thought... for Eri...???????” face sigh

the struggle is real y’all

(ETA: and that’s... the last we ever saw of Overhaul, I guess? well all right then. I assume Deku will make good on his promise, so we know he’ll get that little bit of closure before going back to jail or whatever, and I confess I’m more than fine with leaving the rest of it open-ended, especially given his character’s history. I think this was pretty generous all things considered.)

lmao holy shit

All Might what did you do to those tiki torch guys?? did you thrash them. did you give ‘em those hands. did you deliver their own asses to them complete with a sticker reminding them Amazon Prime Day is on June 21. we missed out goddammit

so Endeavor, who wasn’t the one he was asking, is telling him that they captured (well let’s be real, Deku captured, give the credit where it’s due) Nagant and Overhaul. and so I guess they’re going to take Nagant to the ER now

fire is no one’s weakness

-- oh my GOD I scrolled down and audibly gasped

[is politely but firmly approached and asked to remove my arm from Deku’s shoulder by the physical manifestation of all this Dekuangst] “we’re sorry, he’s not allowed to have visitors right now” oh shit, my bad. [goes to stand behind a police barricade]

lmao what. did you run out of room on the previous page

what an exaggerated fade to black lmao

-- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I actually can’t see what he’s reacting to so maybe I’m just seriously jumping the gun here lol, but THE HELL WITH IT. the next panel appears to be a cut to Haibori Forest, so I’m just gonna go ahead and declare that Deku ran off on his own all wounded to go have more Dekuangst, just like I manifested. now go call Katsuki goddammit

[scrolls three more inches down] oh

yeah so like I said, Deku is walking very slowly a few feet in front of Endeavor, who’s telling him to wait up. yep. we’ve all gotta be so careful to not just jump to conclusions. I know we’re excited but still

anyway, so! welcome back to Mt. Lady and Kamui Woods (ARE YOU GUYS DATING) and Edgeshot! have fun walking into this obvious trap lol

dammit Deku why are you so determined to tempt fate

[monkey puppet meme faces]

OH MY GOD THIS IS PURE GRADE-A CHEESY COMIC BOOK VILLAIN 101 SHIT AND I’M HERE FOR IT

that’s such a weird way of clapping who claps like that

unlike certain other people who shan’t be named, AFO doesn’t feel the need to inexplicably take his shirt off when recording sinister villain monologues. I think we’re all pretty grateful for that

high fives to everyone who called it!! yep yep

anyway so this whole scene has major booby-trap vibes, which I’m enjoying immensely even though I don’t think anything is really going to come of it lol. probably just another long-winded AFO Speech. but wouldn’t it be funny if like the ceiling started lowering down to try and squish Deku afterwards lol

(ETA: well the explosion was still pretty funny too ngl.)

ffff

[“Dekuangst is the trap” intensifies]

anyway so yeah. he’s just hitting up all of his usual villain talking points. we get it, you’re so smart and you see right through the thin veneers of society and people who don’t conform are left to fend for themselves and labeled as villains and history is written by the victors, and blah blah blah dude are you just jumping randomly from one soundbyte to another lol. literally what are you talking about. what does this have to do with you blowing up Nagant

-- holy shit??

[”Dekuangst is the trap” intensifies MORE?????]

LOL WHAT

BRO. WHAT IS WITH YOU. DON’T YOU KNOW HOW TO LAY ANY OTHER KIND OF FUCKING TRAP GOOD LORD

“YOU’RE NEXT” THE CALLBACK?? THE PARALLELS?? THOUGH WHEN ALL MIGHT POINTED HE MADE IT LOOK WAY COOLER. AFO’S POINTING JUST LOOKS LIKE SMOKEY THE BEAR

HAS ANYONE CHECKED IN ON KAMUI WOODS I HEAR HE IS WEAK TO FIRE?? THE ONLY ONE WHO IS, APPARENTLY

r.i.p. to this particular forest mansion. don’t worry they have a ton of backups

remember last week when I said maybe AFO thinks explosions are gauche. well never mind. he fucking loves explosions

anyway so that’s the end of BnHA, everyone. hope you enjoyed. it was a good ride while it lasted. see you all, good luck in your travels

[softrozene]

Reacting to Reader’s Braces Headcanons

I took a break from my event to create this extremely self-indulgent and rushed headcanons since I finally got my braces off! I have a very strong dislike for my retainer now but it will grow on me :’) Anyway this is comfort for me since my mouth is in pain lol.

One Piece Characters Reacting to Reader getting braces vs. getting them off!

One Piece Characters x Reader (Gender-Neutral/Nonbinary)

*I just did the Straw Hats, Law, Marco, Ace, and Thatch for this! (I did not add Jinbei as a straw hat since I am still not all the way caught up)

Warnings: This is long, Fluff- The characters reacting can be considered platonic/romantic- I will have any romantic (kissing) headcanons in bold. Except Chopper. He is strictly platonic because he is baby.

This is their normal One Piece world since I was a bit curious how they would react since I imagine that if there are dentists/orthodontists in their world it would be rare or only in like huge cities like Water 7.

FLAKSDSA Honestly just imagine Reader leaves the crew once in a while to go get their adjustments done or something lmfao. We ignore logic for this one. Only care about the reactions XD

Words: 2,343

Monkey D. Luffy:

When he firsts sees the metal in your mouth he is curious!

He will be in utter awe or laugh if he thinks they look funny (which of course makes Reader’s confidence plummet lol unless you laugh with him)

May call you a robot

He wants to know why they are shaped around your teeth- It is not like the gold or silver teeth that other pirates have that accompany missing teeth

This is weird for him since your teeth seem to be trying to look straight?

When you explain the reasoning of braces to him he is even more puzzled but excited for you!

He is not sure you really need them since he likes your smile regardless but he is happy if you are happy!

As for when you get them off- He is in awe that the braces did their job! And now you get to wear this weird plastic thing in your mouth

How the heck did you even get it in there?

He has no clue what a dentist/orthodontist is so he will just call them mouth doctor and think Chopper is the one helping you lol

Kissing with them on is also a weird experience for him! (I really hate to say it but he will love if you do not clean them very well. It makes him surprised but happy if he tastes food on them alfdjaslkf I HATE THIS lol)

He likes the way the metal feels when he explores your mouth but hopefully he is not a harsh kisser- You fear something will break if he really wanted to flakdfa

When you get your braces off he is in even more shock! That is so cool! Your smile is straight now! But now you got this weird plastic thing in your mouth... He does not mind he is just forgets you wear it since it is clear!

Luffy honestly does not care what you look like smile wise from before or after. He has no preference. He only cares that you are happy with your smile!

Roronoa Zoro:

“What the hell is in your mouth?”

THIS MAN BATHES ONCE A WEEK SO I WOULD ASSUME THAT IS THE SAME WITH HIS DENTAL HYGIENE?! I really hope not. I hope he cares for his mouth and will pretend he does now falksdfja

Anyway, he sees the metal and he is confused but once you explain it, he really does not care anymore

“Oh, cool, I guess.”

If you are partners though- He will be intrigued how kissing you would be. He takes the chance and decides it is an experience for sure tasting the metal in your mouth. (May remind of blood so he pretty cool with it alfdjalk)

Speaking of blood- If something ends up poking him or cutting him... He will enjoy it to the max tbh however if it is you that is hurt he will cease all kissing and only go for pecks until later

When you get them off I think he would miss tasting the metal

When you get your braces off he does not notice at first... It takes a few smiles before he goes... “Wait a minute...”

Then it hits him!

He will smile and be happy if he notices that being braceless brings you confidence with your new smile!

Nami:

SHE NOTICES THEM IMMEDIATELY AND SHE LIKES THEM

Nami is huge on hygiene so I think she would love to know more about dental hygiene and the concept of braces

She is understanding with your diet restrictions and will scold anyone who gives you weird looks or tries to get you to eat something you should not

She is your go-to for this since she also wants to see the end result as perfect

She is tad worried in the kissing department- Not wanting to mess your braces up since she knows how much effort goes into them but she also worried about her safety and if a wire or lose bracket will poke her or worse you. So she sticks to gentle kisses until they are off

She actually goes with you to your orthodontist to see how they take them off and to be there for you

She is happy with and for you upon seeing the end result!

and now her kisses can be harder >///<

Usopp:

As a tinkerer he will notice and also be intrigued. He has never seen braces (like Luffy and Zoro) and has never heard of them

He asks so many questions

Luffy, Zoro, and him are the ones who forget your diet restrictions which causes much irritation on your side. You will constantly glare at them for offering foods or drinks you can’t have

Usopp will eventually start remembering and be considerate on your behalf

When he kisses you he is soft and gentle- Not wanting to hurt you or himself. If he tastes blood he will pass out in fear just because he will blame himself and think he hurt you. He is too sweet :’)

As soon as your braces are off he will ask SO MANY QUESTIONS about the retainer like how was it made and such? Does it feel weird?

He is just so intrigued by it and of course- It makes you smile even more.

Sanji:

Tbh I feel like he would have had them as a kid or wanted them if his dad cared enough aldfjakl

Also notices them immediately

He will actually cater to your diet needs/restrictions because he knows how much they mean to you if you are going through such a time consuming thing to get your teeth fixed

Besides that he is just a friend you can go to if you are in mouth pain- He will make something soft for you every time you go for an adjustment or tea to help sooth your mouth

If you are kissing on the other hand- If homeboy does not pass out first he will be so gentle. He is terrified of hurting you or making you uncomfortable with your braces on (and lowkey is the same way even if you get them off- You will have to be the one to make the first move)

When you get them off- It is a food celebration! Whatever you missed eating or that you could not eat he will make it all for you!

He does notice if you are smile more and if you are more confident with your new smile! : )

Tony Tony Chopper:

HE IS YOUR BEST FRIEND DURING YOUR BRACES TIME.

He will constantly worry about any mouth pains and since he is a doctor is intrigued how someone labeled as a doctor for teeth does their jobs

He will asks questions constantly and write about your journey with this

10/10 cutie and best buddy for this

Make sure he is stocked on simple pain meds for you

Nico Robin:

She notices them but does not say anything or ask questions unless you want to talk about

She is sweet and looks out for you

Makes sure Sanji helps with your diet restrictions

Besides that she does not notice much or ask much

She is just happy that you are doing this for yourself

Her kisses concerning this are always gentle. She refuses to risk anything with you until after your braces are gone. Only then will she let herself become more heated with kisses.

After your braces she will always compliment your smile (and tell you it was beautiful before too but notes how confident you are)

Cyborg Franky:

“WHOA THAT IS SUPPPPPERRRR!”

He likes them.

That is all.

Okay but seriously. As a man who completely turned himself into a machine in the front he has mad respect for you for putting metal in your mouth. Like that concept is wild to him since the mouth is so sensitive (yet he also can blow flames out his mouth due to working on it aldfjal)

He will refuse to kiss you since he knows how is strength and hard kisses can damage your brackets/wires so he refuses anything until after they are safely off.

Besides that after your braces are off and you have your retainer on (He honestly didn’t notice the retainer lol) He will go “You have a SUPERRRR smile!”

Brook:

Brook honestly does notice them at first but he does not say anything until you do

Cue his jokes: “I NOTICE THE METAL IN YOUR TEETH WITH MY EYES BUT WAIT I DO NOT HAVE ANY EYES YOHOHOHO”

Besides that he is not that interested in them

For kissing though he also refuses to do so since he is straight up a skeleton. He does not want to risk his bone breaking ANYTHING. Though he will peck your cheek. Even after you get them off he is hesitant since he is a skeleton- That does not mean he will not try. If you ask he will get flustered and be gentle for you

When you get your braces off- Brook may tease you and say your teeth are almost as straight as his! And remind you constantly that he is a skeleton adlfjakl

Trafalgar Law:

Is just a king- I should stop all headcanons here alfdkaldks

He knows what braces are and is not that interested in the work only because he prefers his medicinal studies that are more morbid than the mouth

However, he is very observational still and notes how you care for them and what your diet is

For kissing- He acts like he does not care but he is gentle and careful when things gets heated. He is actually a big softie so he will do everything to avoid ruining your braces that would involve a setback.

After you get your braces off he also notices how much more confident you are. How much brighter your smile is because of that

Besides that- He does not make a big deal out of it

Marco the Phoenix:

He and the Whitebeard pirates have been nearly everywhere and met all kinds of people so he is not that surprised when he notices that you have braces

He has seen them before so not a big deal

Much like Law, Marco will not make a big deal out of it

However, if you both are close to each other he may tease you whenever you develop a lisp or when are embarrassed after an adjustment.

Either way he means it with a good heart

God- Kisses with Marco when you have braces are so, so, so, gentle. He is the king of kisses no matter what. He is careful but he sure as hell will not let the metal win when you both get heated. So he knows how to maneuver around your mouth with his tongue >///<

When you get your braces off- It is a celebration with the whole crew. Marco helps plan it and of course takes photos of your smile afterwards since you have every right to be proud of your smile

He will always comment on how your smile is brighter

Portgas D. Ace:

Also with Marco (and Thatch) he is rather used to seeing different kinds of people with different situations so he is not surprised to see metal in your mouth

However when you get close to him he does ask questions and get intrigued

He only teases you when you have some trouble speaking a few words but besides that- He is also respectful and does not think much of the braces

Though since he is one that eats all the time he tries to be considerate for you since he knows that it can be frustrating with your diet restrictions

If you are in a relationship with him he actually is not confident in kissing you with your braces. It is because he cares so much about you and because of his self-loathing- He would HATE if he messed up your braces so he is cautious and tries not to push anything until after you get your braces off

When your braces comes off homeboy is going to dine-and-dash with you EVERYWHERE

Thatch-

Like the other two- Thatch is used to this kind of thing so he is not surprised

Since he is the culinary chef for the Whitebeard Pirates you bet your butt he will have better foods for you to suit your needs

He is also teasing like the others and may take it a far sometimes but he will remind you that you are good with or without braces!

He constantly makes sure you are doing fine though since he is aware of how the other whitebeard pirates may not be as considerate as he is

Kisses with Thatch are gentle but I think if it gets too heated he may forget that he is supposed to be gentle. He definitely ends up tearing up his tongue on the metal if this is the case and he feels bad if you feel bad- If not he will laugh it off and continue if you want

After you get your braces off- He will check with what you want to celebrate! What kind foods you have to eat first and you get the honor of taking the first bite!

OKAY LAST BUT NOT LEAST HERE IS A LIST ON WHO WOULD MAKE SURE YOU ACTUALLY WEAR YOUR RETAINER :’):

Would forget you you wear a retainer so they would not be helpful as a reminder: Luffy, Zoro, Franky, Brook, Ace

Remembers then forgets after a while: Usopp and Thatch

Makes you wear your retainer as instructed and will give you a death glare (out of love of course) if you are not doing so: Nami, Robin, Sanji, Chopper, and Marco

Will make sure you wear your retainer even though he says he does not care, and will murder your soul if you do not do so (out of love but he will lie about it): Law

[softtransbf]

Mister Nice Guy, part 2

part one

Summary: Shit hits the fan, and the rest of the BAU is done with it.

Word Count: 3523

Reader: he/him trans man, no physical description

Warnings: case involving targeting gay people, brief mention of a child abduction case, coming out/anxiety of experiencing transphobia (no actual transphobia though), alcohol, swearing

@aleccolocco (sorry it took so long to finish lol)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"No, that doesn't make any sense at all, doctor!" you spat his title. "He's not jealous of these couples, killing what he can't have, or a homophobe, punishing gay people for being happy. He's putting an end to their unhappy relationships. He sees it as mercy." Over the months, your cold war with Reid turned into outright conflict, and tonight, alone in the police station in Oregon, was no exception. Hotchner had tasked the two of you with presenting the preliminary profile the next morning, and it was going as well as conversations ever went.

"We have no evidence that he knows they're unhappy, though. All of his victims are clearly happy in their relationships," Reid challenged.

You rolled your eyes and scoffed. "Please. One look at their social media and it's obvious that the relationships are on the rocks."

"Where do you get that? All I see are typical happy relationships. Selfies, checking into special events together, posts about kind things one does for the other. Nothing indicating a troubled relationship to me."

"The gentlemen doth protest too much. They're painting an overly happy painting on social media, hoping that some of that happiness will actually become real. They're desperate for the relationship to work."

"Let's say you're right. I don't think you are, but let's pretend for the sake of trying to see your logic through. Why? Why would they be so desperate to save a failing relationship?"

"God, straight men just don't fucking get it!" You went to grab a file, missing his small flinch. "You don't understand how limited the dating pool for men who are into men is. Look at the most recent couple in particular. The most lovey-dovey on social media, and got the most brutal deaths."

"Yes, because they were the happiest. My theory holds," Reid interrupted.

"No. Look, this guy put way more out there on social media than his partner, and look at the pictures he posted. Look how forced his smile is, look at the body language. He needs this relationship to work, because dating as a gay man is one thing, dating as a gay trans man is almost impossible. Having to start over and deal with transphobia over and over again is worse than being in a bad relationship. In his eyes, I mean." Shit, the first person I come out to on this team cannot be Spencer fucking Reid. He doesn't deserve the honor.

"That was yesterday. We haven't gotten the autopsy report yet. How could you possibly know that he's trans?"

"Testosterone vials and needles in the bathroom. Neither of them are old enough for a cis man to reasonably have issues that require testosterone injections. It's HRT, hormone replacement therapy."

"Even if you're right, your conclusion still seems like a much bigger jump than mine, that the killer sees the relationships as happy and is lashing out at that, be it from jealousy or homophobia."

"Whatever. You'll see tomorrow, when we talk to the M.E., that he was trans, and that fact backs me up. I am absolutely right about this, and you will eat your words. Then I will present my theory, and you can choke on yours."

"We? You anticipate us spending more time together?" He raised an eyebrow.

"I meant 'we' as in the team, asshat. The world doesn't revolve around you. Mine sure as hell doesn't. I'm gonna go back to the hotel, write my own damn preliminary profile, and try to get some fucking sleep. Clearly we won't agree on this."

"We don't ever agree on anything," he pointed out.

"Not true. We agree that we dislike each other and can't get along. Good night, doctor." You turned and walked away, not giving him a chance to respond.

This man is going to be the death of me, he thought as he watched you walk away.

~

The autopsy report came in the next day, and you were right. The tech team also found a locked notes app on his phone that catalogued his unhappiness and fear of leaving. You presented your preliminary profile to the team. Reid didn't even argue; he just sat in silence, leaving the room as soon as you were finished. Never one to pass up a chance to gloat for beating him, you offered to get coffee for the team, got everyone's order, and left shortly behind him.

You were expecting to catch up to him, his impossibly long legs be damned. You weren't expecting him to be waiting for you. He pulled you into an empty interrogation room and pushed you up against a wall, his face just inches from yours. It was only a moment before being flustered by the closeness and those goddamn eyes were replaced by anger.

"What the FUCK, Reid?"

"What game are you playing, Y/N? What game are we playing? What's your endgame?" He spoke quickly and softly, but there was an intensity in his voice that had you captivated.

"I'm the one playing games?" You pushed him back, away from you. "You're the one who decided to hate me before we even met. When I transferred, all I wanted was to do a good job and fit in with the team. But quite literally from the minute I walked through the door, you'd decided you hate me. Turnabout is just fair play, gorgeous." Oh, fuck.

"Gorgeous?" You walked past him to the other side of the room, running a hand through your hair and turning your back on him. "Fine. Yeah, okay? I wanted approval from the brilliant and handsome Doctor Spencer Reid. In a way that's respectful of your heterosexuality, of course." You turned around and faced him again. "But that doesn't matter, because you made it clear you wanted nothing to do with me right off the bat."

"What makes you think I'm straight?" He's fucking with me, now that that cat is out of the bag. Great. Fucking cishet men. Even he's no different. Thank god he still thinks I'm cis.

"Garcia mentioned in her newbie-run-down that you're 'awkward, but in a cute way, especially around women'. Plus, she mentioned that Emily is bi, leaving everyone else implied straight as even the best cishet allies are wont to do. And as we both know, Penelope knows everything.

And before you make the hearsay argument I can see forming in that brilliant head of yours, I've heard and seen too much about your impeccable memory to assume you don't remember when we all went to the bar after my first case. I was unabashedly Queer, friendly flirting with Derek and calling out cishet bullshit. When I did the latter, you literally rolled your eyes and walked away. Which is, funnily enough, some cishet bullshit. 

JJ said you were just going through a thing and things would get better, but they just got worse. I'm not going to ask you to spill whatever was going on, because it's not my business, but god damn, dude. Why did you hate me so much so quickly?"

"You asked JJ about me?" He took a few steps towards you, a small smile on his face.

"That's the part you focused on? Jesus fucking Christ. Yes, I asked her about why you decided to hate me before we even met. Whatever. I hope you got whatever you were looking for by pulling me in here. I'm done. Done with this conversation, done with whatever has been going on with you and us since the day I transferred." You turned to leave, but he grabbed your arm. It was barely more than a light touch, but you let it stop you.

"Y/N. I can't-" he sighed. "God, you make my head spin. I can't organize my thoughts enough to say what I want to. JJ was right, there was something I had to work through, and I guess you'd made up your mind about me before I figured it out. It isn't an excuse for how I treated you, just an explanation. As for the more recent development of arguments… I guess I read a subtext that wasn't there. I could never dislike you, let alone hate you. I am truly sorry for- for all of it." With three long strides, he was out the door.

Make his head spin? What subtext? Since when is he unable to say what's on his mind? And what was that about not disliking me? All we've done since we met is argue or ignore each other. Why else would he act like that? Why do I even care? Why am I so knotted up about what he's thinking and feeling? Whatever. Fuck him, and not in the fun way. I've gotta go get coffee for the team. As you were getting the coffee, you couldn't get the memory of his face, so close to yours, to stop playing in your head.

The rest of the case was mostly as normal, but there was an energy between you and Spencer that was distant like when you joined the team, but there was something else to it that you couldn't quite put your finger on. It made you a little bit sad, though, for reasons you didn't understand.

~

"I love you, Y/N. I love you so much. I pulled away from you because it terrified me how much I loved you from the moment you walked through the door that first day. Being around you, even when we were arguing, made me feel alive in a way I never had before. You're all I think about, you're all I could ever want. I love you."

"I… I love you too." You didn't know which one of you moved, maybe you both did, but in an instant, you were kissing Spencer Reid, and you couldn't have been happier.

-

You woke up with a start, breathing heavily. You looked around; you were in your room, home alone, and it was 3:37 am. What the hell was that?

Four hours later, you trudged through the door of the BAU office, venti red-eye in hand. You made it about ten steps before Derek had his arm around your shoulders.

"Whoa there, hot stuff. Rough night?" You tried to shake him off, but he wouldn't budge, so you just kept walking, making him go with you towards your desk.

"So not your business, Derek. You being open with your personal life doesn't mean we all have to be open like that with ours."

"Personal life, huh? So who is he? More importantly, how was he, and should we expect more mornings like this in the future?" You rolled your eyes and playfully shoved him away. You'd reached your desk, so you sat on top of it, facing him. As you did, you made eye contact with Spencer, who was well within earshot. His face was unreadable, and you weren't sure why him hearing Morgan tease you like that upset you. It never had before.

"No, Derek. There's no one. Just some nightmares. Nothing major; I'll be fine by tomorrow." You got off your desk, sat in your chair, and logged into your laptop. Derek whistled and walked away without another word, shaking his head.

You tried to focus on the paperwork you needed to get done, but you couldn't stop thinking about that dream. The feeling of his lips on yours… it felt so real.

This is ridiculous. Love? We don't even like each other. Well… there was the stuff he was saying yesterday- 'I could never dislike you, let alone hate you', and some sort of subtext? But not disliking someone is a far cry from love. Plus, he's straight, so this is all absurd. And even if he DID have feelings for me, I sure as hell don't return them. I mean, maybe he's not as awful as I've thought, especially if he wasn't coming from a place of dislike. And he really is very pretty. Those eyes… Wait, what the fuck? This is all fucking ridiculous. I just need to get a full night's sleep tomorrow, and all this weirdness will be gone.

You took a giant gulp of your coffee, shook your head, and ran your fingers through your hair. Fortunately, Hotchner called a team meeting, forcing your attention to other things.

While no case could ever be described as 'normal', this case was pretty cut and dry, once you figured out what you were looking for. No dramatic twist, no tense showdown at his arrest. There weren't many cases like that, but you were very glad that this one was. You never sleep well when on a case, and no matter what you did, you couldn't shake that dream, the butterflies it left in your stomach every time you looked at him, and the strange disappointment when, unlike before that moment in Oregon, he wasn't looking at you.

Two more weeks passed. The energy between you and Spencer, whatever force it was that had drawn you together to argue again and again, was gone. You were polite to each other, and cooperated as necessary, but didn't do more than the bare minimum when it came to interacting with each other. Your interactions were cold and low-spirited. So you were so glad for a fun night out with Penelope, Emily, and JJ.

"So, Y/N, things seem… different… between you and Spencer these days. Did something happen?" Emily's tone made it clear that the three of them had intended to bring this up long before the plan to get drinks was even made. "I appreciate y'all waiting until I had a couple of drinks in me at least before going here. I guess we just got tired of fighting? I don't know. I can't figure out what's going on in that brilliant head of his. I thought I at least knew where I stood with him, even though it was purely adversarial, but I think I was wrong. But then that leaves me with no idea what he thinks of me or why I care so damn much."

"Really? No idea at all?" JJ asked. "I remember walking by a closed door in the police station in Oregon and hearing the word 'gorgeous' being thrown around." "Oh my god. You heard that?" You buried your face in your hands, and they all laughed.

"Yeah, I did, but only that one word. I'd figured you were on the phone with someone, but then you and Spence both started acting sad. I wasn't sure, of course, that you were talking to him until just now."

"Fuck. Okay, yeah. I think he's pretty. But I'm absolutely not alone in that. Derek calls him Pretty Boy, for goodness' sake. Appreciating someone's beauty doesn't have to mean anything more."

"Y/N, really? After everything we've been through together, you're gonna lie to us like this? Whatever happened, you've both been miserable since, and it's throwing the whole team off balance."

"What do you want me to say, Penelope? That I'm in love with him? He's pretentious and a know-it-all and a nerd and funny and kind and gorgeous and oh my God. I think I'm in love with him." The three women clapped and cheered.

"Finally, you get there! Took you long enough." Emily winked. "So, what's the plan now?"

"Keep this shit between us until my feelings go away. Even if he wasn't straight, I wouldn't risk fucking things up by telling him how I felt. As it is, I stand no chance in hell, so I'm just gonna write this one off as another straight guy I've fallen for and try to move on."

"Y/N, if you tell him-" Penelope started.

"No. You, more than anyone, know why I can't even entertain the idea of trying to be with him. I can't set myself up for that kind of pain. Not here, not where things are so good." You looked at all three of them. "I know that your intentions were good, but I just can't do this. I'm sorry." You grabbed your coat and left.

Your interactions with Spencer changed yet again. Now that you knew you loved him, you couldn't help yourself from being warmer towards him. As the weeks passed, you got closer. After three weeks, you considered him to be a good friend, not that that made things any less painful. You were just hoping that Penelope, Emily, and JJ were going to respect your wishes and drop the subject of your feelings for him.

[From: Penelope]: round table room ASAP

Shit. The last time you'd gotten that text from Penelope, the team left on a serial child abduction case 30 minutes later. So, despite it being your day off, you ran out the door and were there with your go bag in 15 minutes.

But no one else was there. No files on the table, nothing to indicate that there was a new case. You pulled out your phone to call Penelope, but then you heard a commotion outside the door- you'd closed it behind you.

"No, Derek, wait, I don't-"

"Can it, Pretty Boy, and thank me later." Derek opened the door, pushed Spencer into the room, winked at you, and shut the door, all in about 3 seconds.

"Spencer. Um, hi. Is the rest of the team not going to join us? Garcia's text seemed pretty urgent." You tucked your phone into your pocket.

"I don't think so, since I just heard Morgan barricade the door." He tried to open the door and failed.

"Oh my god they're Parent Trapping us. I'm gonna kill them."

Spencer tilted his head, confused. "Parent Trapping?"

"Oh my god have you not seen any of the Parent Trap movies? Were you living under a rock in 1998?" "I was seventeen and working on my first doctorate, so pretty much, yeah," he laughed. You couldn't help but laugh, too, as you firmly ignored how his smile made you absolutely melt.

"Fair enough. The '61 one is good too, but the '98 Lindsay Lohan one is Iconic for good reason. Anyway. The point is, they've locked us in here and won't let us out until we have a conversation."

"Just a conversation? Or do they want us to talk about something in particular?" He took a seat at the table.

"I- yeah, they have a particular topic in mind. I'm so sorry. This is my fault. I was tipsy and said things I should have just kept to myself. I thought they'd respected my wishes and left well enough alone, but clearly they didn't. And they won't let us out of here until I tell you-" you hesitated.

"Tell me what?" He leaned forward, and part of you swore you saw hope in his beautiful brown eyes. You looked at the floor, avoiding them.

"Tell you that I… have feelings for you. Romantic, cheesy, butterflies-in-my-stomach feelings. I don't know why they want me to tell you this. We've just gotten to a good place as friends, and you're straight, and-"

Somehow you missed the sound of him getting up and taking the few steps over to you, because you practically jumped out of your skin when his hands were suddenly on your shoulders.

"Y/N. Please, darling, look at me?" Bewildered by the endearment, you did, and his smile was blinding. "I'm not straight. I'm bi, and I think part of me has been in love with you since your first day at the BAU. The thing JJ said I was working through? The potential problems of having feelings for a coworker. For you. As soon as you walked through that door", he pointed and then took both your hands in his, "I loved you. The night at the bar? I was rolling my eyes at myself for how much I wanted to kiss you, and I walked away to stop myself from doing something reckless. I love you, Y/N. Can I do something reckless?"

"I'm trans," you blurted. "I hope that doesn't change anything, but it's something you should know. If knowing that I'm trans changes things, now is the time for you to say something. If it's a problem and it blows up later, it might actually kill me. Because I love you, too. So much. If it doesn't change anything, then please, Spencer, kiss me."

The words were barely out of your mouth before his lips were on yours. You weren't sure how long you were kissing before you were interrupted by cheers from the other side of the door. "Shit, Spencer, they're going to be the worst about this, aren't they?" You were a bit embarrassed by how breathy your voice was, but you were too happy to really care.

"Oh yeah. We're not going to get a moment that's just us in this building ever again. Do you want to get it over with and face them, or would you prefer we stay in this moment a bit longer?"

"What do you think, doctor?" you asked, pulling him in for another kiss.

[tinyboxxtink]

“Warrior”

Awwwwww SHIT. She cannot be stopped, folks. 

So I thought about making this an Epilogue to “Helpless”, but I MIGHT turn it into a sequel, if that’s something you guys want. I have so many ideas!!! 

Anyway, here is a “Helpless” SEQUEL ONE SHOT as of now. 

TBH I love it so much. I was listening to the song and I just couldn’t get this idea out of my head. OH RIGHT, if you haven’t heard Demi Lovato’s “Warrior”, listen to it now. And/or as you read this. I listened to it the entire time I wrote it. Hell I’m still listening to it. LOL.

“Please, Liv?” 

Barba was begging his best friend, on his knees in his own office. 

“This is ridiculous, Rafa. You’re a grown man. Stop begging,” 

“Then promise you’ll do it,” 

“I..wha...WHY do you need me to take your girlfriend out?”

“Look she just went through a traumatic event--” 

“Um it was pretty traumatic for me too, if you couldn’t tell,” 

“Right. I know...Liv, you know I love you,” He put a hand on her shoulder. “But she ALSO lost the one person in the world that she’s had for most of her life. She has no one now,” 

“She has you, obviously,” 

“Well yeah sure she has me, but I--I can’t be her whole world. She needs friends. And she doesn’t meet anyone because she had to quit her job at Fazzoli’s. So she’s just been my Personal Assistant for the past month until she can find something else, and she’s just…. around, ALL the time,” He explained the past month of your lives.

“Sounds like you’re getting sick of your little hustler,”  Liv chuckled. 

“DON’T, call her that.” Rafael warned her. 

“Why? It’s what she did,” Liv scoffed.

“Olivia...look,” Rafael rubbed his temples. “You are my best friend in the entire world, and I love you. But you have GOT to let this little...grudge against Y/N go,” 

“Grudge? What-- She--” Olivia protested, but Rafael cut her off.

“Whatever happened, it’s in the past. We’re putting it behind us, and so should you,” 

“Whatever….” Olivia rolled her eyes.

“If you want to keep being my best friend,” 

“Is that a threat?”

“It’s a plea, once again,” He took her hand. “If you truly love me, you will help me help her,”  He gave her those puppy dog eyes, the ones she could never resist, even if she wanted to. 

“Oh that is DIRTY, Barba,” She pushed him away with her hand over his face. 

“Again though, I don’t know what you want me to do. She obviously doesn’t think we’re going to be friends, and all of my friends are your friends-- also, they’re all adults,”

 “She’s an adult,”

“....Sure she is,”

“OLIVIA,”

“Okay okay, I just...Oh you know what, I could ask Lucy if her and her friends want to come,” She picked up her phone and flipped through it.

“See? You’re brilliant,” Rafael smiled.

“Whoa there counselor, I’m not sure how excited she is going to be to drag her friends out with her BOSS, her friends and your pet---girlfriend,”  She quickly corrected herself, but Barba heard it anyway. 

“You’re unbelievable,” He sighed. 

“Look I said I would ask her, I didn’t say it would be happy about it,”

“Alright, alright,” He nodded. “Thank you, Liv,”  he gave her a small hug then she turned to walk out. 

“Don’t make me regret this,” She eyed him. Just then, you came up behind her in the doorway.

 “Regret what?” 

 “Uh...my lunch plans, Rafael suggested a place I haven’t tried,” Olivia pushed her hair behind her ears nervously, looking everywhere around you but your eyes. Classic lying tells, but you really didn’t want to deal with her stuff right now so you left it alone.

“Oh, well have fun detective!” You gave her a cheery smile as she walked out of the office. You handed Rafael one of the two coffees you had brought in.

“Fuel for my baby,” You smiled, kissing him on the cheek. You could see the screaming behind his eyes when he smiled back at you. 

“...What?” you raised an eyebrow.

“What, what?” he asked, acting oblivious.

“Rafael, you know I know something is off,” 

“Wha… no, not--” he started but you gave him a knowing look. “You said you weren’t going to do that anymore, Y/N,” he was suddenly stern, referring to using your ‘superpower’. 

“And I told you, I can’t turn it off!” You reminded him, you had said it in your very first conversation. 

“Okay but you can...y’know pretend you don’t see things,” he pointed out.

“Or, you could just tell me why your eyes are screaming for help right now,” you crossed your arms.

“Wha--that--Good lord,” He sighed, taking a swig of his coffee. 

“I’m around too much, aren’t I?” You finally stated the obvious, tired of ignoring it anymore.

“No! No no no…” He put a hand to your face. Overly repetitive denial, meant yes. 

“I’m sorry, I can’t help it. I don’t have anywhere else to be,” You bit your lip and looked down at the floor. You hated being this helpless, relying on him for everything. Ever since he had left the hospital, you’d moved in with him and took care of him while his shoulder healed. And then when he went back to work, you told him you had to quit working at Fazzoli’s because it was just too hard to go there every day after everything that had transpired there. You really had tried, but you just kept having flashbacks or panic attacks that Arianna would come walking through the door and take you away again. 

Rafael was totally understanding, as usual. He told you that you could be his Assistant for the time being, which really just meant you followed him around all day like a puppy. And he was paying you with his salary, so he was basically just giving you money. You hated it; you were used to being completely independent-- sort of. 

Sure Arianna ‘protected’ you, but it wasn’t like you were a baby bird. You had been through so many horrific things in your short life, all on your own. You knew how to survive in the mean streets of NYC, making your own money. You were like a bulldog, and now you were a lap dog. 

“Hey,” Rafael picked your head up back to face him. “I know. I’m not blaming you for anything,” 

“But you are sick of me,” 

“I just...I think you need more people in your life, that’s all,” he stroked your hair.

“Yeah, I know,” you shrugged.

He was right, but you weren’t used to having more than one person looking out for you, or vice versa. You didn’t really know what it was like to have a normal friend, and your serious trust issues really didn’t help the situation. Rafael had tried to get you to go to therapy to work through your “issues”, but you didn’t trust your therapist, which made the whole thing moot. 

“...Wait, so what were you actually talking about with Liv?” 

“She told you, I was--” 

“Can we not do this again,” You rolled your eyes. 

“....Alright fair enough,” He sighed, giving up. “I asked Olivia if she knew of any girls that might want to ‘hang out’ with you,” 

“Oh my god, Rafa!” You were humiliated. 

“God now I’m like that weird kid in class who eats paste, and her parents have to to talk to the teacher who makes the other kids be her friend,” 

“....That’s a weirdly specific scenario,” he raised an eyebrow.

“...Yeah, well-- not my first time,” You shrugged sadly.

“Aw honey,” He half laughed, taking your into his arms and kissing your forehead. “I would’ve been your friend, no matter what you ate,” 

“Yeah well considering you were probably in high school when I was in elementary, I doubt it,” You smirked.

“Ooof, below the belt,” He put both hands over his crotch with a pained expression.

“I’m sorry,” you stuck your tongue out with a smile. “But you kinda deserve it, trying to beg people to be my friend,” 

“I didn’t BEG…” He started, but saw that look in your eyes. “Okay but it worked,” He came clean. 

“Oh Olivia and I are gonna have a girls night? Are we gonna braid each other’s hair and talk about boys we like? OH WAIT,” You made sarcastic gestures. “We like the same boy!” You rolled your eyes. 

“I mean, I can’t blame you. He’s pretty awesome,” He smirked.

“And so not full of himself,” You pulled on his collar towards you.

“Not at all,” He kept smirking, as he placed his lips over yours. 

Just then Barba’s phone vibrated-- a text from Liv. 

 “KARAOKE NIGHT. TONIGHT. 8PM,” 

 “Uh….well, I guess you might be right?” He showed his phone. It vibrated again, another text came in as your were reading it.

 “LUCY AND FRIENDS, YOU BETTER BE THERE TOO. I’M NOT A BABYSITTER,” 

 “Well, she is just lovely,” you handed it back to him with a roll of your eyes. 

“Hey, at least she’s trying,” he texted a reply to Liv.

 “Can you try as well? Please?”  He asked you while looking at you with the same puppy dog eyes, Liv wasn’t the only one who couldn’t resist them.

“Fine…” you sighed, and he rewarded you with a kiss.

“I need something to wear,” You batted your eyes, to which he rolled his own and pulled out his credit card. 

“See? I’m leaving you alone, it’s working already!” You giggled, walking out of the office to go shopping.

------

That night, you and Rafael showed up to a place called TOP5.. It was a fun, trendy hipster  restaurant. There were several booths, some tables, even a few couches for people to chill. And in front of everything was a huge stage, with a piano next to it. But there was also a DJ, spinning records. 

Rafael noticed Olivia waving to him; he lead you to a giant half booth half table where Olivia, Rollins, Fin, Carisi, and four young girls you had never met before sat with drinks in their hands. 

“How did you get these guys out?” Rafael gestured to the squad.

“I asked them nicely,” She smiled.

“Yeah, if ‘nice’ means  it was either this or catching up on paperwork all night,” Fin rolled his eyes. 

“This is Lucy, my nanny,” Olivia pointed the young girl next to her, who gave a small wave. 

“And these are my friends Riley, Lexi and Brianne,” Lucy pointed to each of her friends, who also did a wave as they heard their name. 

“Rafael Barba,”  he nodded to the girls. “And this is my--”

“Y/N,” You interjected, introducing yourself. You were determined NOT to just be “Rafael’s Girlfriend” anymore. 

“So we were looking through some songs, I don’t think anyone’s brave enough to go up there though,” Lexi informed you, gesturing to a huge black binder in front of her and her friends.

“More like not drunk enough,” Lucy laughed.

“Hey we can fix that!” Brianne giggled, calling for shots from the bar.

“Great idea Barba, it’s like we’re chaperoning,” Amanda whispered to Rafael, who rolled his eyes and nodded to a waiter for a scotch. 

“May I?” You asked Riley, sliding the book in front of you. You flipped through a binder, until a song stood out to you. It was like it was screaming to you from the page.

You had heard so many “therapeutic” mantras over the past month, people trying help you get over your trauma. Talk it out, they said. You need to get it out. 

Well, this was one way. 

You excused yourself and walked up to the DJ, whispered something to which he nodded, and went to the mic. 

“Alright alright, looks like we have our first vict--I mean, superstar!” He joked. You seriously thought about punching him in the face for using “victim” as a joke, but you knew that was the trauma talking. And you were to fix that, not indulge it.

 The music started, and you just let the words spill out:

This is a story that I have never told

I gotta get this off my chest to let it go

I need to take back the light inside you stole

You're a criminal

And you steal like you're a pro

All the pain and the truth

I wear like a battle wound

So ashamed, so confused

I was broken and bruised

Thoughts of you and Arianna’s life together ran through your mind like a movie montage as you sang. The words were so scary accurate.

Now I'm a warrior

Now I've got thicker skin

I'm a warrior

I'm stronger than I've ever been

And my armor, is made of steel, you can't get in

I'm a warrior

And you can never hurt me again

 That first chorus felt like you were letting out a huge breath you had been holding in for God knows how long. You wanted Olivia, Rafel, the squad...EVERYONE to know, that you weren’t this helpless little lamb they had seen for the past month.

 Out of the ashes, burning like a fire

You can save your apologies

You're nothing but a liar

I've got shame, I've got scars

But I will never show

I'm a survivor

In more ways than you know

'Cause all the pain and the truth

I wear like a battle wound

So ashamed, so confused

I'm not broken and bruised

 Now the flashbacks of the real trauma you had been through came pulsing through your mind. Horrors that still kept you up at night; you’d have night terrors sometimes but had hidden them from Rafael so far. He didn’t need to know just how fucked up you truly were. None of it mattered now anyway, you were a survivor. And you had the scars to prove it.

 'Cause now I'm a warrior

Now I've got thicker skin

I'm a warrior

I'm stronger than I've ever been

And my armor, is made of steel, you can't get in

I'm a warrior

And you can never hurt me

 There's a part of me I can't get back

A little girl grew up too fast

All it took was once, I'll never be the same

Now I'm taking back my life today

Nothing left that you can say

'Cause you were never gonna take the blame anyway

 You thought of everything Arianna had taken from you. Sure your childhood was shit, but you were fairly young when she convinced you to run away with her. You could have stayed in your small town, found a decent job. Lived a normal life, with normal friends. But she sucked you into your life of crime and deceit, all while telling you it was perfectly fine, and that she loved you. But it was all bullshit, all of it. You saw that now. And now if she ever came back into your life and tried to convince you of anything, you wouldn’t fall back into her lies.

You took a breath before the last chorus, suddenly feeling your face getting wet. You realized you had started crying while you were singing, but for some reason you weren’t ashamed of it. It actually made you feel stronger, like letting your tears wash the pain and shame from yourself.

 Now I'm a warrior

I've got thicker skin

Now I'm a warrior

I'm stronger than I've ever been

And my armor, is made of steel, you can't get in

I'm a warrior

And you can never hurt me again

You finished the song in a whisper as your head dropped to looking at the floor. You were exhausted from the mental journey that song had taken you on. You had never felt so...free. Before you could even look up, the room erupted in applause. 

You lifted your head to see everyone in the room giving you a standing ovation...even Olivia, who you could swear had tears in her eyes. 

You gave a sheepish smile and a curtsy, quickly getting off the stage and returning to your booth, where not a face was dry. 

“...Aww, guys...,” You didn’t know what to say; you had never been that open and vulnerable to ANYONE before, and here you had gone and ripped your soul open in front of a group of strangers.

“That was--” 

Olivia came around and hugged you, a genuine hug. It lasted uncomfortably long, so you had to break it with a confused smile. 

“I’m sorry I judged you,” She apologized, and you saw the absolute sincerity and guilt written all over her face.

“It’s fine, if I were you I would’ve judged me too,” you gave her an understanding smile.

She nodded, giving Rafael an apologetic look as well, to which he took her hand and pulled her into a hug. 

“So, who’s next?!” You smiled, pushing the binder to the middle of the table. Protests and laughs began at the table, bickering about who was drunk enough to follow you. 

Rafael leaned over to you, whispering in your ear over the noise of the crowd.

“You’re the bravest warrior I know, Y/N” He wiped tears from his eyes, kissing your cheek.

“Yes. Yes, I am,” you smiled, wiping the rest of his tears as you kissed him. 

And for the first time maybe ever, you believed it.

[squirrel-moose-winchester]

Keeping Secrets

Title: Keeping Secrets

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader

Word Count: 2075

Square Filled: Castiel

Summary: Under the spell of a truth potion, Y/N reveals things to Cass that she makes him promise not to tell anyone, especially Dean. Cass agrees, but secrets tend to find a way of revealing themselves whether you like it or not.

Warnings: Fluffiness, Keeping Secrets, Misunderstandings, Mentions of Killing (not literal), violent threats, Innocent Angels, Language? (honestly, I my mind is so scrambled right now, I can’t remember if there’s any…), Mentions of Kinkiness, and I think that’s it.

Written for @spndeanbingo​ (round 2)

Disclaimer: No my gif. Credit to giuls from tenor.com. All mistakes are mine.

A/N: Secrets, man… so easy to keep, yet at the same time, so hard to keep as well. Or is it just me? A side effect of being a terrible liar? Lol. Well, there’s a fun fact about myself. I am a terrible liar! Happy Reading! xx

Hey, Cass told me. There’s nothing to be ashamed about, it’s OK.

When you read that text, your face went up in flames with embarrassment, and now, you were on a mission to find one very, soon to be dead, Angel who spilled the beans. You couldn’t believe Cass told Dean! You confided in him in full confidentiality! Hell, Cass promised to keep his mouth shut, that he’d never tell Dean, that you could trust him to keep your secret, but now you knew that you were wrong.

Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong!

“Castiel, when I get my hands on you, I’m going to throttle your stupid angelic neck!” you muttered to yourself, brows furrowed and lips morphed into a deep frown.

You stomped through the bunker looking for the blabbermouth. Still grumbling, you passed Jack’s room, the seemingly teenaged boy looking at you, as you ducked in, with a confused expression. When you didn’t respond to him after he called your name several times, he decided to follow you, wondering why you were acting so strange.

He picked up on a few key words you were saying: stupid, angel, kill, asshole, assbutt, and a few other choice words that he knew were inappropriate but didn’t quite understand what they really implied.

Next, you stormed into the kitchen finding Sam eating a salad. In your already foul mood, you scoffed at his choice of nutrition, rolling your eyes at the gentle giant of a man.

“Y/N? Are you okay?” He asked, looking at you and then to Jack, who shrugged in obliviousness.

“I’m fine,” you hissed, not meaning to snap at him. “Have you seen Cass?”

“Uh, no. He should be in here somewhere. He didn’t mention anything about leaving,” Sam provided.

“Okay, thanks,” you replied, tone still not very pleasant.

You marched onwards, Jack still trailing behind you. He wasn’t sure if you knew that he was following, or if you simply didn’t care, but Jack continued on regardless.

The two of you made it to the war room, the space void aside for a few empty beer bottles that was most likely left by Dean. Growling in disapproval, you walked into the library next, just in time to see Sam walk in from the other end.

“Cass, there you are. Y/N’s looking for you and she doesn’t seem very happy,” Sam warned just as you stepped in.

“Damn right I’m unhappy,” you confirmed, storming up to Cass. “I can’t believe you told Dean!”

“I don’t understand. What did I tell him that I wasn’t supposed to?” Cass questioned, the look on his face completely perplexed.

“Oh, you know what you told him!”

Cass squinted his eyes and tilted his head, a tell that told you he was trying recollect what he possibly could have said. Annoyed with him, you exclaimed in frustration. “I can’t believe you told Dean that I liked him!” you finally revealed, Jack and Sam’s eyes widening and brows raising.

“What?”

Your body froze when you heard the familiar deep voice echo through the library. You didn’t dare to look back, already knowing your face must be glowing with humiliation.

With wide eyes and mouth slightly ajar, Cass’ eyes went from you to the Dean, who had taken a few more steps closer and was now standing directly behind you, next to Jack. “Uh… Y/N,” Cass started, “I never disclosed any of that information to Dean,” the angel confessed.

“I don’t get it,” Jack interrupted. “I thought we all liked each other? You know, we’re a family?”

Sam cleared his throat at that, giving Jack an acknowledging smile. “Uh, yeah. We do like each other, but they’re talking about a different kind of like.”

“Like what? Like love?” the innocent boy blurted, the word love making you cringe.

“Whoa, whoa, hang on a second,” Dean took control of the room. “Y/N, you love me?” He asked, neck a little stretched out, eyes wide, and mouth hanging open with disbelief.

Shyly, you turned to face him, heart leaping when you instantly made eye contact. “Didn’t you already know that? You texted me that Cass told you.”

“What?” Cass quipped. “I did not tell him that,” he defended himself.

“No,” Dean confirmed. “When I texted you that, I was talking about the hunt.”

Your face went completely white. Just the other day, you and Cass had come home after what was supposed to be an easy hunt. You were adamant that the monster you were hunting was a vengeful spirit possessing innocent people, but it turned out to be a witch casting curses. It was that mistake that landed you in becoming a victim of said curse. A truth curse.

The witch worked at the diner where all the incidents happened. You figured that the ghost was attached to something or someone in the restaurant, but it was the witch mixing people’s drinks with her truth potion. That was how your secret was let out to Cass, but he had assured you that he wouldn’t tell anyone, that your secret was safe with him. And it was true, you told Cass how stupid you felt for not realizing that it wasn’t a spirit but a witch terrorizing the small town. You made a mistake and you weren’t the type that to brush off little mistakes like that. You took it to heart, like you were a bad hunter.

“Oh…” was all you could say at that point, feeling even more embarrassed, and stupid, that you already were.

“Uh, hey Cass, Jack, how about we go into the kitchen; give Dean and Y/N some privacy to talk.

The three of them left the room, heading into the kitchen. You were grateful at that but at the same time, you wished that he would have invited you along, but you knew that it was too late and you and Dean needed to have this talk.

“Y/N…” you flinched at the sound of your name.

Wanting to beat the bullet, you just let everything out on the table. “Look, I’m sorry okay? No one was supposed to know! I know you don’t feel the same way but I hope we can just forget all about this and pretend that it never happened. I was drugged out and didn’t really mean it,” you continued on until Dean stopped you.

“Y/N, stop. First of all, you weren’t drugged out, you were bewitched with a truth potion. Everything you said was the truth, not something you didn’t really mean.”

Your shoulders dropped knowing he was right. The only thing left now was to take the rejection. There would be no more fantasizing about all the what ifs because all those dreams were about to be crushed by the hard truth… Dean Winchester did not love you back. Great.

“Okay, I get it,” you sighed. “Look, I’m sorry. I know you don’t feel the same way, so I’ll do my best to get over you,” you told him.

“What? No!” Dean exclaimed. “Y/N, you don’t have to do that. Uh…” Dean’s demeanor suddenly changed and if you were reading his body language correctly, he seemed tense, timid… cute. No! Y/N stop it! Don’t think that way! “Uh, I actually kind of…”

In the kitchen, Sam leaned against the prep table, Cass sat at the table, while Jack stood in the middle of the room. “So...” Jack started, “when you said that they were talking about a different kind of like, you mean love?”

Sam met Jack’s gaze, “basically,” he answered.

“Okay… I don’t see what the problem is. Don’t we all love each other? I mean, it’s pretty much that same thing, right?” Jack questioned.

This time Sam let out a soft chuckle. “No, Jack. Y/N is in love with Dean… romantically.”

“Oh! Okay, I get it now. So Dean is in love with Y/N and now Y/N is in love with Dean! They both are in love with each other! That’s a really good thing, right?” Jack smiled, proud of himself for final grasping the situation.

“Yes, that is correct,” Cass answered instead. “But after we killed the witch and the potion wore off, Y/N told me not to tell Dean. But she ended up telling him herself instead, albeit it was unintentional.”

“I think this will be good for them. They deserve to be happy,” Sam grinned, actually glad that the truth was all out there.

Dean struggled to admit his own feelings. He wasn’t the type to talk about his emotions but if he wanted to have a future, like a real future, with you, then he had to tell you. He had to confess to you too.

“You actually kind of what?” you asked.

“Uh, I actually kind of… you know. I like you too,” he finally said it.

It was your turn to be dumbfounded. You weren’t sure if you heard him correctly, but at the same time you didn’t want to ask him to repeat himself, scared to find out that it was merely your delusional head playing tricks on you. It couldn’t be possible that Dean felt the same way, right?

“Y/N, did you hear me?” Dean inquired.

“I’m sorry, I don’t think I heard you correctly. I thought you said you felt the same way,” you giggled bashfully.

“Because I did.”

You froze at the confession. There was no denying it now. Dean had just confirmed that he felt the same way you did. The thought of how to proceed from there was short-circuiting your brain, not once ever thinking this was possible. Dean had said, on more than one account, that in this life, falling in love was impossible, that it would only end bad. You agreed with him, but that didn’t stop you from feeling the way that you felt, and now he was admitting that he had feelings. Those exact forbidden feelings he said hunters couldn’t have.

Having never planned for this unforeseen moment, you shifted your eyes from his to whatever you could find in the room. You were looking at an open book when you heard footsteps, and when you looked back to Dean, he was right there in front of you, his lips an inch away from yours. An audible gasp escaped you and Dean simply smiled.

“I thought you said hunters can’t have love,” you gulped, eyes trained on his invitingly pink lips.

“I say a lot of things Sweetheart, but if you’re willing, I’m willing to give this a try too. You know… give us a try.”

Averting your eyes to his, you searched for something that told you he was lying, that he didn’t mean it, but when you saw nothing but sincerity, you couldn’t help yourself. You lunged into him, arms wrapping around his neck and lips smashed against his in a needy fashion. Dean growled, his arms wrapping tightly around your waist as he hoisted you off the ground a little. When you pulled away, you were both breathless with matching dopey smiles stretched on each of your lips.

“Wow, Winchester,” you grinned.

“Better than you imagined?” he teased.

“So much better.”

“Everything okay in here?” Sam asked as he stepped back into the library, Cass and Jack in toe.

“Everything is great!” you beamed, taking your place beside your new boyfriend, hands intertwined.

“So are you two together now?” Cass questions, looking at your interlocked hands.

“Yup! All secrets are out. There’s nothing to hide anymore,” you assured.

“I see. Then can I ask you a question, since there are no more secrets?” Cass directed his question at you.

“Uh… go for it,” was you reply, not knowing you would soon regret it.

“When you were under the truth spell, you said you wanted Dean to punish you. To tie you up and punish you all night long. Spanking and choking you. I don’t understand why’d you want him to inflict pain on you.”

Your face went red as all eyes were on you. Jack had no idea what the hell was going on, but Sam gave you that horrified look, knowing he just heard something he wasn’t supposed to, or needed to know. Dean on the other hand was shocked at first, but quickly smirked at the notion.

“Cass!” you shouted it mortification. “I’m gonna kill you!” Just as you were about to attack him, a flutter of wings echoed through the room and he was gone. “Cass!”

--

A/N: You made it to the end! Thank you guys for reading! I appreciate you taking the time to read what I wrote! If you enjoyed it, please reblog to help share my fic, and leave a comment because it acts as fuel to keep writing and to keep posting! Y’all have a beautiful morning, day or night! xx

[thefloorisbalaclava]

Everywhere - Chapter 3 - Javier Peña x Fem!Reader

A/N: So I decided to be really cheesy and use a different Fleetwood Mac song for each chapter. This chapter (the ending at least) is based on the song I’m So Afraid. Some of the lyrics are at the end :)

Summary: The case takes you on a mission that you make even more dangerous.

Warnings: None but y’all might get mad at me for leaving you hanging lol

Tagging: @longitud-de-onda @pascalisthepunkest @misslolasworld

Part 1 Part 2 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11

The next morning most of the things you asked your brother to send down to Colombia for you arrived. You spent most of the morning unpacking the boxes and somewhat organizing. You had to at least feel as though you were settling in. Luckily, Steve told you that he wouldn't need you unless there was an emergency today so you had plenty of time.

Your phone rang and you rushed to answer it just in case this was the emergency Steve needed you for. Fortunately, it was Connie just checking up on you.

"You left with Javi last night?!" she exclaimed.

"Uh...good morning to you."

"So...what happened?" she asked hoping for some juicy story but, in this case, you were glad to disappoint her.

"Nothing at all. We live in the same building so it was just convenient for him to drive me home." Connie sighed on the other end as if you had let her down. "What were you expecting?" you teased.

"I expected you to...live a little," she said.

"I am. I just got here, okay?" There was a knock on your door so you went to answer it. "And if I was gonna sleep with someone it sure as hell wouldn't be…" You opened the door, "Javier Peña…"

"We're addressing each other by full names now?" he asked with that cocky smirk on his face. Connie was still talking but you hadn't heard a word she said.

"Call you later," you said before hanging up.

"Steve said you weren't answering. We got something."

"He sent you to come get me?" You walked away from the door to pick up the things you needed. You checked your sidearm for bullets before putting it in your holster and slipping your jacket on.

"I offered," he confessed.

"Oh...okay. C'mon then." You walked out the door and shut it behind you then walked down the stairs. You got into his car and he climbed into the driver's side. "We meeting him there?"

"Yeah." Javier started the car as you looked straight ahead pretending to find whatever was out there more interesting than anything in the car. "Last night…"

"What about it?"

He turned to you with a confused look on his face. You happened to miss the hurt that flashed in his eyes. "Uh...nothing I guess." He was silent the rest of the time. As soon as he pulled up and you spotted Steve, you hopped out and grabbed the bulletproof vest he handed you.

"What do we got?" you asked.

"One of our informants told us that Poison would be here at this time." Steve looked at you then at Javier sensing the tension. "Is everything…"

"Fine...yeah. Want me to take point?"

"Uh okay?" Steve looked and Javier again and shrugged.

"Let's go." You pulled out your gun and held it down as you approached the small building. You entered first, keeping your eyes and ears trained on any sounds to alert you.

"What the hell happened with you two?" Steve whispered to Javier.

"Shut the fuck up!" you whispered angrily. Suddenly there was the sound of running footsteps above. "Shit!" You began running up the stairs, aiming your gun but whoever it was had already made it onto the roof. "The roof!" you yelled back at them as you ran ahead to give chase. Steve shouted your name but your adrenaline carried you up the rusted ladder and onto the roof. You could hear the men behind you trying to keep up but by the time they made it to the roof you were jumping to the next one.

"She a fucking acrobat or something?!" Javier yelled to Steve behind you. Suddenly a shot went off and the bullet whizzed past you but you kept going, gun drawn and aimed at the man running wildly ahead of you. You stopped in order to get a better shot.

"It's over, buddy," you whispered as you took the shot and the man cried out. Javier and Steve stopped behind you as you holstered your gun. "I got him." You turned to them with a smile then a shot rang out and Javier was at your side faster than you could blink your eyes. Someone shouted something at you but Javier was holding you so tightly you couldn't make out anything.

"Stay with her. I'll go," Steve said before making his way towards where the shot came from. You had hoped the other men had gone and picked up the man you shot.

"You can let go now," you mumbled before shoving away from him. You two looked at each other for a moment before you walked around him and made you way off the roof.

Back down on the ground, you had found the man you shot being put into an ambulance. He spotted you and began yelling all sorts of things. He said they were coming for you and that this wasn't over. You had a price on your head now and they wouldn't stop until you were dead.

"Did you need me to-" Javi started.

"I got it. Empty threats don't scare me." You walked over to Steve. "You find the other guy?" He shook his head and your heart sunk but you didn't let them see that. "We'll get him."

"You shot one of their men," Steve said, "You gotta watch yourself."

"Steve, I don't need a lecture." Your hands shook so you crossed your arms to hide them. "We should be able to get some information outta that guy, right?" You looked towards the ambulance.

"Not if you're asking," Javier said, sauntering up beside you. "You should probably let us handle that part."

You looked between the two of them and scoffed. "Whatever." You mumbled a word you had learned in Spanish under your breath.

"What was that?" Javier asked. You only glared at him before walking away.

"What did she say?" Steve asked.

"I'm pretty sure she just called us assholes." Javier watched you walk away and get into the car. "You know, she's fucking gorgeous, but she's gotta work on that aggression."

"You wanna tell her that?" Steve slapped Javier on the shoulder and made his way to the car. Javier followed, climbing into the back seat since she had taken the passenger seat.

"That was stupid, you know?" Javier said as soon as he was settled in. Steve turned to him quickly then looked at you nervously. "Running ahead like that...you didn't know what you were getting yourself into."

"Once again, I don't need a lecture."

"It's not a lecture, it's me telling you to use your damn brain next time." He sat back, frustrated.

"Thank you, Burt Reynolds. I'll try to remember that." You stared straight ahead as Steve drove and put a hand over his mouth to mask the laugh that tried to escape.

"Burt Reynolds?" Javier sat up straight again.

"She's right. It's the mustache," Steve chuckled. You looked at Steve and let yourself laugh a little. When you looked back at Javier, he was trying to be angry but failing. The little smirk gave him away.

"You're both assholes, you know that?" he said as Steve pulled up to the station. Steve got out and you sat there for a moment gathering your thoughts.

"You okay?" Steve asked through the window.

"Yeah...fine. I just need a minute." As soon as the coast was clear you let out a shaky breath and covered your face. This wasn't the first time someone shot at you but it reminded you of the first time. That time, the bullet actually hit you. You rubbed your chest where the wound was. It seemed to be throbbing now. You almost died then. Anyone else would've taken that as a lesson learned but you were stubborn. Running onto the roof today was a shitty idea, Javier was right, but you'd never tell him that. When that gunshot rang out you couldn't get down fast enough but Javier had been there and his first instinct was to protect you. He had a heart even if he was sort of an asshole. You kind of were too.

You made your way into the station, removing the vest and throwing it onto your desk with a sigh. Steve watched every move you made and knew you weren't okay.

"Go home," he said, pulling you from your thoughts.

"What?" You looked up from the desk.

Javier walked in smoking a cigarette and stopped when he saw the way you looked at Steve.

"You almost got shot today and you don't think I noticed you bothering with that old wound? You're thinking too much. You're scared and you need to rest."

"I ain't scared," you snapped quickly moving your hand away from the wound. "But...fine." Javier was about to speak as you approached him to walk out of the office. "Move," you said as his mouth opened and he closed it right away.

"She's been shot before?" Javier asked, still watching as you walked away.

"Yeah. Long time ago now but it still bothers her every now and then. She almost died." Steve read through some papers on his desk but Javier kept his eyes on you until he no longer could.

At home, you curled up on the sofa and cried. Steve had been right, you were scared. It wasn't just the gunshot though. What that man said...they wanted to kill you. You were certain he also said something about using you before killing you and that made it worse. Now you would be afraid of every sound; every knock on your door, every shadow in the dark. With the adrenaline wearing off, you began to feel just how tired and sore you were. You were afraid but that didn't stop your eyes from closing.

Knock knock knock.

You sat up too quickly and closed your eyes to stop the room from spinning. You grabbed your gun and walked to the door, pulling it open and aiming at the person on the other side.

"Whoa!" Javier put his hands up and you lowered the gun.

"What the hell do you want, Javier?" You sighed and walked away from the door.

"I was just checking on you." He walked in and closed the door behind him.

"Did Steve put you up to it?" you asked, getting yourself a glass of water.

"No."

You stopped drinking and looked at him. "Oh. Well, as you can see I'm right as rain. Don't wanna keep you from any of your meetings with informants."

He chuckled bitterly. "Right. You know, the least you can do is thank me. I saved your ass today."

"I didn't need saving."

"Why can't you just admit that you're scared, hm? Or would you rather continue to take it out on everyone around you?" He walked to the door and opened it. "Good-fucking-night," he said angrily before slamming the door.

"Dammit." You leaned against the kitchen counter and shook your head. "Fuck you, Peña." Yet you stared at the door contemplating. "I don't need anyone checking up on me. I'm fine," you lied to yourself. "Alone. I love being alone even if I am afraid." Yet you were pulling your door open and walking to his. This was a bad fucking idea. Why were you doing this? "I am fine," you whispered even as you lifted your hand and knocked on his door. When he opened it you could hardly look into his eyes. A cigarette hung loosely from his lips.

"I don't wanna be alone right now," you confessed. He moved aside and let you in.

I been alone All the years So many ways to count the tears I never change I never will I'm so afraid the way I feel

[vagrantblvrd]

Do you have any ideas for the most angsty path to the Battle Buddies getting to finally be happy together?

Oh my God, this, okay, this.

So, idk if this is the most angsty path for these idiots, but it’s up there for me.

I mean, we all know by now what a terrific liar Jeremy is by now. He’s proven time and time again to be absolutely gifted, one might say.

SO.

Let’s say Ryan’s been working for whatever agency for a while now. Seen it go from something close to noble to something as far from that as you can get. (Not that there’s anything like noble in their line of work though, so there’s that.)

It’s nothing like the movies where there’s a clear-cut knowing right from wrong and all that, no.

Just comprise after compromise and sometimes you gotta look the other way and you can’t save everyone. (Trying to just gets you dead, or worse and you don’t want to know what that worse is, so yeah.)

Anyway, Ryan’s been at it for a while and he’s a jaded bastard, cynical as hell but the part of him that signed up for this life once upon a time is still in there somewhere. (Wants to do good, and he does when he can, but he’s been slapped down for it more than once and plays things smart(ish) - for the most part - now.)

And in comes Jeremy with that shine of someone just out of an academy somewhere or whatever training stage that churns out bright-eyed and bushy-tailed do-gooders like him, right?Ryan is like SIGH when he finds out Jeremy’s going to be his rookie because he won’t be the first, you know?

Ryan’s had other rookies placed in his care, and one way or another they don’t last long.

Not like he’s hard on them or anything, pushes them to quit, he’s just.

It takes a particular mindset to deal with Ryan’s…quirks. (Eccentricities.)

Part of the reason they stick the rookies with him, because God knows if they can’t handle him they won’t last long anyway. (Gotta be able to handle the weird and unexpected and all-around disturbing among other things, and Ryan’s pretty great at those things.)

So in comes Jeremy, this bright spot, and Ryan is SIGH because he knows how this goes. Kid comes in wanting to do good in the world and then reality sets in and it ruins them. (One way or another.)

Only.

Turns out under that bright smile and friendliness Jeremy’s a weird fuck too. Doesn’t bat an eye when Ryan goes about being Ryan, will, in fact, upstage him in certain areas. (Has that smirk and look on his face and instead of being annoyed Ryan’s impressed and amused and a little intrigued by this little shit that’s been dumped on him.)

Takes a little while before they really get along, but the seeds for it are there (pretty much) from the beginning.

A few bumps in the road here and there, because for all that Ryan’s starting to like Jeremy he’s still this kid, right. Young and really kind of dumb to be in this line of work and it’s just easier to think of him like that in his head. That line of reasoning behind people not naming strays they find so they don’t get attached. (Ryan pretends that actually works, like he doesn’t have some crotchety cats sharing space with him at home, or that old mutt he picked up a few years ago.)

Anyway.

They get along swimmingly, cause a lot of chaos and responsible for a hell of a lot of property damage (in the field for the most part, but their HQ and training facilities should invest in sturdier equipment - if it can’t take one little explosion and resulting fire not their fault).

They become a headache for the agency in a way that doesn’t involve conspiracy theories and the whatnot because sheer chaos and destruction and general mayhem.

Then Ryan makes the mistake of getting a little too close to Jeremy because they get sent on highly stressful missions with the death-defying shit they do and high-stakes everything. Close calls and moment to contemplate their mortality in the aftermath. Hours spent waiting for a target to arrive and the hurry up and wait.

Time spent recuperating from injuries and just.

Thinking.

A lot of it, and anyway, sometimes shit happens.

They’re on a mission somewhere and stuck in an alley with enemies searching for a couple of assholes and no cover, if they fuck up they blow the mission and get dead and all that fun and exciting shit?

Ryan’s the one to back Jeremy up against the alley wall, but Jeremy’s the one to huff in fond exasperation when Ryan doesn’t follow up with that tried and true making out to throw their pursuers off act everyone knows and uses at some point.

Gives Ryan this crooked little smile and then there’s kiss? Holy shit, there’s kissing.

Not like.

Romantically driven or anything like that, just the sure would be nice to not die in a dirty alley tonight kind of way, but, uh. Ryan’s kind of losing the thread here because even though it’s not supposed to be that kind of kiss, Jeremy’s still really fucking good at the general kissing thing.

And Ryan, with the hands that didn’t know what they were supposed to do so they settled on Jeremy’s hips, he kind of goes off-script. Takes those hands and cradles Jeremy’s face because this is Jeremy he’s kissing and it’s nice and he’s kind of fucked here, but hey. Kissing.

Also, also, maybe this tiny part of him that’s always been a little -lol- competitive because he’s not too bad with the kissing either. (And, okay, it’s Jeremy and Ryan can’t not make this good for him too and wow, wow, that’s not a conscious thought but he won’t realize it until later, so)

The guys chasing them fall for the assholes making out in a an alley ploy and the moment the two of them are clear Jeremy pulls back - looks a little dazed, which Ryan feels a touch smug about. (Or would, if he, too, wasn’t feeling the same.)

But then, okay, then they have that okay, now what? moment post-emergency situation kiss where Ryan’s hands are being awkward again.

Just. Suddenly super aware of their location. (Either side of Jeremy’s face with the wide eyes and :O expression, which, admittedly is less :O! and more :O? as time passes, but whatever.)

Still awkward and also shortness of breath from the extended emergency kiss and just.

Wow, never though that would work, but movies, huh? Ha-ha-ha???

Jeremy snorting beause Jesus Christ, Ryan, why are you like this?

But also, “We should, uh. Pick that up later?” and !!! “TALK. Talk about it later. Yes. Totally what I meant.”

But Jeremy’s kind of avoiding eye contact and blushing and Ryan goes from !!! to *eyebrow raise* and mm~hmm the way he does when he’s being a smug bastard. So naturally Jeremy elbows him in the ribs because mission! Must mission then li - talk. Yes. “Talk”.

(Spoiler: They do talk? But mostly it’s like. Kissing and other such things that usually end with a fade to black for television rating’s sake and such.)

Anyway.

These idiots get their shit together and sometimes there’s a smooch or two of these Fond Looks™ on missions. The whole making out in an alley ploy gets used a hell of a lot more, and sometimes it’s even mission related, so that’s always a bonus. :D

But.

In the meantime the corrupt bastards running the agency have gotten worse, and get some of Ryan’s and Jeremy’s buddies killed. Fellow agents and long-time contacts - people Ryan’s known and trusted for years and it’s not like Ryan was turning a blind eye to what his agency became, just.

What the hell could he do about it? (Bitter and cynical and no idea how bad it was until Jeremy came along and that was the beginning of the end because he started to give a shit again, didn’t he.)

Looked into things and caught the attention of the wrong people and he knew it. Warned Jeremy best he could without giving too much away - eyes and ears everywhere and of course his place is bugged to hell and back. (Smarter to leave ‘em in place than tip whoever planted them there off.)

Sure bet the same is true for Jeremy’s place and just.

Paranoia ramped up like whoa and then there’s this mission, right.

Bitch of a thing that should require months of prep and planning and lead-up time. Best intel they can get and maybe Ryan asking his contacts to look into things on the side for him, all hush-hush and the like.

But they don’t get that.

What they get is a skimpy batch of intel - no telling how good any of it is, or sources or anything. Super short time-frame because supposedly this situation popped up overnight without anyone anticipating it and it just.

The whole thing reeks of a trap and Ryan’s just like fuck, because before the whole Jeremy Situation he would have been - not fine with it because wow no, just. A little less angry about it.

Because definitely a scheme by the baddies to get them (him) killed and never mind the collateral damage.

So.

Ryan tells Jeremy he’s got a bad feeling about it after the briefing and Jeremy’s like. He’s got the same feeling because he’s not an idiot, but he also doesn’t know their agency the way Ryan does.

Thinks Ryan’s just being paranoid or something like that and tells him they’ve been through worse, so no worries, right?

Ryan’s like oh, fuck again because now is not the time for this optimism bullshit, Jeremy, but he can’t exactly say that, so.

They go off on their mission and Ryan tries, he really does, to tell Jeremy about what he’s been doing RE conspiracy shit and baddies and all that, but something always interrupts.

It’s Jeremy being all “Sorry, what, I wasn’t listening,” because he was going over their intel one more time on the flight out and distracted and then someone sat next to them and not a great time talk about it.

They’re waiting for a contact to arrive and Jeremy notices what he thinks is someone following them so they have to deal with that instead, and so on until they get to the heart of the mission.

Stealth until it’s not, and then shooting and yelling and the requisite explostions —-> fire and just as Ryan thinks they’ve managed to survive the hell mission?

Shit’s on fire all around them and the target (along with a large chunk of their people) are dead and it’s just the two of them in what used to be a lavish home built on the backs of others and so forth.

Ryan turns to Jeremy, some stupid joke - a quip or a one-liner or something stupid like that on his lips - and Jeremy pulls a gun on him.

Aims it at Ryan’s chest and blank expression and, “You should have left things alone, Ryan,” and “I’ve got my orders,” and “Don’t” when Ryan takes a step towards him. (To ask why, or talk him down or reason with him, it doesn’t matter because Jeremy and Ryan and God, he should have known better. He did, but then Jeremy happened and Ryan fucked up.)

Ryan is like ??? and kind of hoping this is some terrible joke, but it’s not and Jeremy’s not smiling or laughing and just when he’s about to pull the trigger one of the baddies goons (late to the party and all) stumbles in and draws Jeremy’s attention - and a bullet - which gives Ryan the chance to blindside Jeremy.

Only not so much and there’s this knockdown no-holds barred fight. Ryan’s on the defensive at first because he doesn’t want to hurt Jeremy, doesn’t know what’s going on, but Jeremy’s clearly out for blood.

Wants to kill him, hurt him, and eventually that gets through to Ryan, sinks in that this isn’t some fucked up joke or like all the times they’ve sparred in the past, and he gets angry when he realizes it, fights back.

Because Jeremy’s being a bastard, letting loose with these comments and remarks, throwing everything Ryan thought they had in his face. Telling him he’s stupid for trusting Jeremy, should have known better.

Wasn’t he the one to tell Jeremy not to trust anyone in their line of work? That it would just get him a knife in the back sooner or later? That there are go good people left anymore? And so on, right on into things Ryan told him he hadn’t told anyone else and it stings, burns.

Plays dirty, to win, and this isn’t like all the times they’ve sparred in the past. Impersonal at first, because they didn’t know one another and Ryan was testing him and then it became fun, because they were friends (and then more) and sometimes there was totally unfair cheating with stolen kisses as distraction and getting pinned to the mat or a wall for more kisses and then the whole sparring thing got sidelined, but yeah, this is not one of those times.

This is Jeremy aiming for Ryan’s knees, his kidneys. Going for his fucking throat and this look in his eyes Ryan’s never seen and he reacts in kind.

They draw blood, break bones, go vicious and underhanded and Ryan gets the upper hand at some point. Stares into Jeremy’s eyes and how easy would it be to kill him right now?

So easy, just fucking kill him and walk away and lesson learned, but -

Jeremy’s just looking back, all battered and bruised and this thing like resignation in the back of his eyes and Ryan hesitates.

Just enough for Jeremy to turn the tables, grab his gun that Ryan knocked away at the beginning of the fight and comes back up with it leveled at Ryan’s chest.

Only this time Ryan’s got his gun out too and it’s a stalemate.

Ryan staring at Jeremy because what else can he do? He’s got his gun in his hand and no way he could miss at this range (the same is true for Jeremy too, but not the point) but he knows he can’t kill Jeremy.

(Too soft, weak. Stupid as hell.)

“Why?” he asks, but he never gets an answer because Jeremy shoots him.

Always a hell of a shot and, again, no chance he could miss at that range and Ryan goes down.

Not a killing shot, because body armor and Jeremy knows it, but it knocks the wind out of Ryan and he’s pretty sure he’s got fractured if not fully broken ribs and everything’s gone all…fucky. (Getting shot will do that to you, even if you’re wearing body armor. Also the fight beforehand isn’t helping because tired as hell and hurting and it’s been a really shitty day, hasn’t it.)

Jeremy walks over to him, looms, and Ryan’s just trying to breathe without blacking out. (Not doing a great job of it because ow, but hey. He’d rather go out looking Jeremy in the eye than not, you know?)

Jeremy clenches his jaw and Ryan dredges up a smirk, little, do it, you bastard to it because he doesn’t have the air to say it? But wow is he thinking it.

Just as Jeremy’s about to put another bullet in Ryan, make this one count, there’s a commotion.

The baddie’s backup, their backup, or local law enforcement (the place has been on fire for a while AND the whole things blowing up shit beforehand) who knows.

Whoever it is, Jeremy has to make his escape before they catch him and such.

(Throws one last look at Ryan before he does, though, and even though Ryan’s on his way to passing the fuck out he could almost swear there’s something like regret in it, but that’s probably wishful thinking on his part and the whatnot.)

Ryan ends up in a local hospital as a John Doe (or whatever they’re called now?) and ~sneaks out before the authorities can question him about recent events or Jeremy or someone else comes around to finish the job.

Learns he’s been declared dead, killed in the line of duty and what a shame, you know? He was a hell of an agent and a good man and they’re really laying it on thick.

Hides out for a while while his ribs heal and hesitant to reach out to his contacts because so many of them became Jeremy’s contacts too, and it’s just.

Not even paranoia at that point so much as playing it safe, or smart, or whatever.

Dreams up all these elaborate plans of Revenge and the whatnot against the agency and the baddies (Jeremy lumped in there too, although Ryan never really has a plan for him, just. You know. General revenge plans.)

Anyway.

Once his ribs heal and he’s had time to think about it and not just reacting, Ryan realizes he’s done with all that shit, you know?

Tired, broken, whatever and he takes what he had before the hell mission and Jeremy’s betrayal and dumps it on some journalist or whoever somewhere he knows will jump at the chance to get to the bottom of things.

Maybe it’s someone at an agency that’s still in it’s almost noble stage of life that will Do The Right Thing and break his old agency the way it deserves to be broken.

Not his problem anymore.

Gets his hands on some fake IDs and all that and pulls money from accounts he set up years ago in case he had to fake his death or go on the run because you never know when you’re going to need something like that.

Sets up  new life for himself somewhere.

====

If we’re going with FAHC AU that means the Vagabond rolls into town with the dumb mask - two birds one stone with the Intimidation Factor and hiding his identity.

He Vagabonds about for a while until the Fakes hire him for a job and he’s like. ??? because what even are these assholes? But against his better judgement he finds himself liking them more than he thought he would and just. All kinds of shenanigans all over the place. Also, so, so much regret on Geoff’s part as Ryan and Gavin team up to make his life miserable and Michael enables their shenanigans and Ray is like :D about it all. Jack is very much >:D because Geoff asked for this.

Somewhere in there Ryan keeps tabs on his old agency and feels this hollow sense of petty vindication when he hears it’s been broken wide open thanks to his help and some outside sources - no one can agree on who or how or whatever, but he’s glad to be done with all that. (Doesn’t want to think about it anymore.)

ANYWAY.

Things happen and they pick up this asshole for another job, Ryan’s heard about him from the others, right? This free-lancer they worked with a time or two before. No fashion-sense to speak of, according to Gavin, but always hilarious and the good kind of chaos. (Weird how very not reassuring that is? But okay, whatever.)

Thing is, it’s almost like this guy is avoiding him? Whenever he’s around the penthouse it seems Ryan always “just missed the guy”, or when they’re out on a job he’s sniping because Ray’s off God knows where for a job from a friend of a friend if not working for the Roosters.

(More and more these days and really, they all know he’s going to head off on his own one of these days, just waiting on Ray to come out and say it, and no hard feelings because these things happen, but keep in touch and give them a call if he needs help and so on.)

Ryan is like. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

Figures the guys just not comfortable working with the Vagabond and doing it on purpose, which. Fine. So long as he’s where they need him to be and he doesn’t do anything to put the others at risk he can deal with that.

But then!

He’s on a job with this asshole as sniper and Gavin and Michael are also there and things fall apart, right? Turn to shit and there’s shooting and yelling and oh my God, Gavin, if you don’t shut up right now about that goddamn coin conversation again he’s going to kill you to save the assholes trying to kill them the trouble, okay? Now is not the time!

(Because they may or may not have been ~discussing coins and odds before things turned to shit and Gavin just rolls right on into the shootout still going on about the damn thing even with people trying to kill them and this isn’t funny, MIchael!!1!)

The sniper is just up there doing his thing, dropping baddies and opening up pathways for them with the killing the assholes in the way and all.

They get the hell out of there and regroup at a car Gavin tells them to head for. (He’s the only one still with his earpiece and a direct line to the sniper and anyway, Gavin seems to know where to go.)

Ryan’s going for the driver side door when Michael hip checks him right the fuck out of the way - “Are you fucking kidding me? The fuck out of here with your shitty driving!” - and shoves him towards the back passenger seat while he hops behind the wheel.

Gavin hops into the back with him and they peel out, Gavin giving MIchael directions to pick up their sniper while Ryan fires potshots at the assholes still chasing them.

A few terrifying moments later and they squeal to a stop a street or so over, and this asshole Ryan’s never met hops in. He gets a flash of color -purple and orange and yellow - and then they’re off again and it’s all chaos and mayhem and shooting some bastards when they make the mistake of getting too close.

Head to a safe house somewhere to hide out until they can figure out what the fuck went wrong, and Ryan finally, finally gets to meet the sniper.

Fucking freezes when he does, the guy slowly turning around after saying something to Gavin and oh, fuck, it’s goddamn Jeremy.

Ryan’s got his gun out and aimed at his his face without thinking about it, feels cold and disconnected and he’ll be damned if he lets Jeremy fuck with his family.

There’s some yellng from Michael and Gavin, and Gavin the little idiot getting between Ryan and Jeremy. Hands up andhey, c’mon, what are you doing Vagabond? We’re all friends here, aren’t we? And so on because Jeremy isn’t supposed to know who he is - no one but inner crew and a few select others know his name at this point - and Ryan’s so fucking on edge he can’t even, is about to yell at Gavin to get out of his way, Michael do something, he doesn’t know -

“Hey, Ryan,” and that’s Jeremy’s crooked little smile he gets sometimes Ryan remembers too damn clearly.

That soft little tone he used to get that’s like a knife in Ryan’s chest (he knows what it’s like, and this is worse because Jeremy and betrayal and what the fuck - )

“Jeremy,” Ryan says, nice and level and this threat behind it that has Gavin standing up straighter, losing that calming, soothing look to his face that has him turning to face Jeremy.

Backing up a step and to the side so he’s not in the line of fire and something eases in Ryan at seeing it. Realizing that whatever Gavin thinks, he’s trusting Ryan’s judgement over Jeremy’s, or.

Something.

(He knows the crew’s worked with the sniper - Jeremy - before, weirdly always when Ryan was out of town for reasons, but they haven’t known him as long as they have Ryan and it’s. He doesn’t know what it is, that Gavin is trusting things to Ryan at this point but it’s important.)

Michael, who’s off to the side in all this makes this irritated noise and drags Gavin back, keeps him behind the two of them and it’s just as reassuring for Ryan to know he’s trusting Ryan’s judgement on this too.

Makes that paranoid part of him that never quite got over the whole Jeremy Situation settle at knowing they’re on his side in this.

And then Jeremy sighs. Tells Ryan he knows he won’t believe him but there was a reason for the betrayal all those years ago.

Ryan’s not falling for it, but Jeremy just shrugs an keeps going. Tells Ryan about some assholes that approached him between missions, made him an offer he couldn’t refuse.

Double agent kind of shit to help expose their agency - told him about the shit they were doing and how it would look if they went ahead without him, you know?

How Ryan and other agents who weren’t involved would be lumped in with the real baddies - following orders isn’t a good defense when it comes down to it - but if Jeremy helped them, maybe they could do something about that?

See to it Ryan didn’t go to jail (or worse), but to do it he’d have to pretend to be working for the baddies.

Let them think he was one of theirs, just as greedy and ambitious and he went along with it to protect Ryan when the “good guys” came along to destroy everything the baddies were working towards.

Did a lot of bad shit to get closer to the baddies and the people in charge, things he regrets even now, but they didn’t really trust him, did they.

Knew all about Jeremy and Ryan and so they decided to test his loyalty.

Arranged that last mission fo theirs and gave him an extra objective to kill Ryan for them if for some reason everything else on that mission didn’t.

And Jeremy, okay.

He goes to the “good guys” and tells them about it and gets no goddamned help from them because they don’t give a shit after all. Tell him not to blow this for them - if he does, Jeremy’s going to end up in jail (or worse) right with Ryan and the rest and he better remember that.

So Jeremy, okay.

No fucking clue what to do, only that if he fucks up here they’re screwed anyway and no way out for them he can see?

(Tries to tell Ryan, but he just. Can’t? Doesn’t know how and by the time he does, it’s too late.)

He never planned to kill Ryan was ready to let Ryan kill him, because Ryan’s always been smart. Would have found a way to survive, get out from under the thumb of their agency and start over somewhere else and just. Fuck, Jeremy was so fucking tired at that point?

Stress of all the secrets he was keeping and the things he’d done and just.

Would have been  relief, you know, if Ryan put a bullet in his head that day, to be honest.

But then the commotion and having to run and he tried to find Ryan afterwards but the fucker turned into a ghost. (Thought he might actually be dead for a while there, until he heard rumors about this guy in Los Santos and got curious enough to go looking, but that’s another story all on its own.)

Jeremy stuck around with the good guys and their Plans to destroy the agency long enough to see it through to the end. Angry and bitter and no satisfaction when it happened, because they’d taken too much from him by then.

(Felt this twinge of amusement when he heard they’d gotten a huge boost/help from some journalist and this pile of secrets someone dumped on them, and that was the start of this bit of hope Ryan might still be alive.)

He dropped off the grid for a while after that, did the whole new identity thing for a while and ended up on the other side of the law. Heard those rumors about the Vagabond and went looking, and somehow always seemed to just miss the guy, you know?

Ran into this sniper somewhere, became a backup sniper to the Fakes and enjoyed working for them more than any of the other assholes who’d hire him on for whatever needed doing.

Coasted along, had a damn good hunch the Vagabond everyone talked about as Ryan - too many coincidences for him not to be, really - and had no idea what to feel about the inevitability of them running into one another again some day.

(Bound to happen in a city like Los Santos, given their shitty luck and the fact they had ties to the same crew and just. Yeah.)

When it did, he kept finding reasons not to come face-to-face with Ryan for a long damn time. Did everything he could not to, because how the fuck could he hope to explain himself?

But then this latest situation and Jeremy providing cover for Ryan (so much like the old days) and the others and then the car chase and now this, and just.

Yeah.

He’s expecting a bullet in his head, or maybe Ryan’s going to draw it out, but.

Ryan’s staring at him - or it seems like he is. Hard to tell with the damn mask, and.

Just.

Ryan, okay.

Staring at Jeremy and that scar along his chin he gave him back in that fight way back when. Barely noticeable with the beard Jerremy’s got now, but there’s this little break in the beard where the scar runs. Wouldn’t notice it if you weren’t looking for it kind of thing.

A few others, all healed up by no (it’s been years, better hope they would be) and Ryan just feels.

Fuck if he knows, just.

Gavin and Michael, hell, everyone seems(ed) to trust Jeremy before this, but so did Ryan and look how that turned out.

But.

Ryan’s always been an idiot, especially when it comes to Jeremy.

(Too soft, weak. Stupid as hell.) 

“Why?” he asks, even though Jeremy’s just told him, them, because.

He asked way back when, heart cracked right down the middle and bleeding out and Jeremy staring at him like he was a stranger. (A target and nothing personal, but I’ve got my orders.)

Jeremy could take the easy answer here, say it was to protect Ryan, but was it, really? (Yes, but also no, and no easy answer at all.)

“I thought I was doing the right thing,” Jeremy says, because Ryan always told him there was no such thing for people like them.

(For anyone, really. There’s always more than one side to a story and someone’s hero is someone’s villain and all of that convoluted shit and just. Yeah, no fun at parties.)

Ryan snorts, because it sounds like Jeremy really thought he was, at the time.

(Younger and stupider and. Something to protect, even if Ryan’s having a hard time believing it after everything. Wants to, though, so fucking bad because after everything he still loves Jeremy in a way.)

“If you hurt them, I’ll kill you,” he says, completely serious and no give to it because Ryan’s stupid and weak, sure, to be giving Jeremy a second chance now but.

There’s Gavin and Michael and the others. There’s Jeremy looking wrecked by everything he’s just told Ryan (them) and letting him make the call on whether or not to kill him like whatever Ryan decides is fine with him, and just.

He can’t bring himself to kill Jeremy on his own behalf, but if he so much as indicates he’s going to put the others at risk he’ll do it.

And then, you know.

Long awkward time of them learning to work together since Ray ends up leaving not long afterward and they need someone to fill his position.

There’s A Talk with Geoff about it, but Ryan is just. He doesn’t mind, so long as Jeremy doesn’t hurt anyone in the crew. (More complicated than that because he’s still all fucked up about it, but can handle working with Jeremy for the crew’s sake and so on.)

It takes a long, long time before they’re anywhere close to being okay again. Ryan slowly learning to trust Jeremy again.

Learning this new Jeremy who’s old and smarter, yeah, but he’s gained this edge the Jeremy he knew never had. Gotten angrier, jaded and bitter and so on and it’s hard reconciling this Jeremy to  past Jeremy and just. (He sees the Jeremy he remembers from time to time, though. Usually around Gavin and Michael and the others, when his guard’s lowered and it’s. Fuck, it’s confusing as hell and he doesn’t know what the fuck is going on in his own head.)

There are all these Situations that happen from time to time, things that leave Ryan running around knowing Jeremy’s up high somewhere with that sniper rifle of his and how easy it would be for him to take Ryan out in the confusion. Blame it on the chaos and all that and know the others would forgive him for it (at some point) and move on and Christ, that’s dark, but it still runs through his mind every goddamn time.

Never happens though, and there are times Jeremy’s not sniping, feet on the ground right next to Ryan and this shove at the last minute that means Jeremy takes a bullet for him.

Bloody and injured but not dying - guy shooting for Ryan was a terrible shot - and loopy on painkillers and this soft, sad smile and “I’m sorry, Ryan,” and “I fucked up,” and “I know you won’t forgive me, but that’s okay, I hate me too,” and other such things that send Ryan the fuck out of there to go shoot shit in the shooting range or driving like a madman through the streets of Los Santos all the way up to Chiliad until the anger and hurt in his chest burns itself out.

(Anger at Jeremy for not just fucking talking to Ryan way back when, tell him what was going on and his ow obliviousness and secrets and how fucking stupid it all was. How they could have avoided the whole mess if they’d just fucking talked, and how fucked up things are now and just. God, he doesn’t know.)

Jeremy doesn’t seem to remember any of what he said while on painkillers and neither does Ryan.

They both do, of course. Jeremy assuming he’s right about Ryan hating him and Ryan coming to terms/making peace with the fuckery that was/is their lives and starting to look at Jeremy from the other side of all that anger and hurt.

Seeing the way he is around the others, how they are around him. How determined to keep them safe Jeremy is, the hits he takes to do so.

And then at some point they just.

Click again. Work together better than ever - were doing fine before, but now? The others take notice, realize something’s shifted but not sure what, and Ryan catches Jeremy giving him these odd, thoughtful (hopeful) glances when he thinks Ryan isn’t looking.

Goes on like that for a long damn time, and then there’s a Situation and the whole making out in an alley ploy comes back into play, only this time it’s Jeremy who’s hesitating.

Jeremy who doesn’t seem to be able to take that last step, seems scare to, and Ryan.

God, he just.

Snorts, fond and exasperated and then there’s kissing.

Careful, careful, his hands don’t dare touch Jeremy this time around because this is such a fraught situation for them, stay on the wall behind Jeremy, fingers digging into the brickwork as his heart races because this brings up all kinds of memories and doubts and insecurities and fears, and it’s such a mistake.

But it saves their lives, has the assholes chasing them moving past without incident and then he’s staring at Jeremy who’s staring back, this heartbreakingly fragile thing in his eyes and it’s just.

“We should talk,” Ryan says, voice rough and heart about to burst from his chest and all this emotion in him he can’t sort out just yet. “Later. We should talk.”

Because feelings and them and their whole fucked up backstories pre-Fakes and yeah.

They do talk, and it’s this godawful painful thing with raw emotions and such but when it’s over there’s. Hope that they can maybe salvage what they had before, piece it together again and patchwork that shit with the things that have made them who they are now and create something stronger because of it, and oh my God, my mcfreaking heart, okay.

But yes.

====

If we’re sticking with the general Battle Buddies AU he finds himself a quaint little town to become the resident weirdo.

(You know the one, right? Lives in a small cabin/house somewhere a few miles outside the town or city or whatever. Seems nice enough, but also some kind of survivalist or something. Comes into town once or twice a week for supplies and such. Will chat with the store clerks or someone striking up a conversation but generally won’t initiate one himself.

Doesn’t cause anyone trouble and maybe - totally - takes in that three-legged stray that’s been a mainstay in town for a while. Got hit by a car or something a year or so back and the vet saved its life at the cost its leg. Someone took it in for a while but it ran away or they moves away and anyway, it’s kind of a weird dog, itself.

Not mean or dangerous, just. Weird.

Then Ryan comes along and the damn thing takes a liking to him (and vice versa) and anyway, they seem pretty happy about the state of things.

Wherever he ends up he’s there for a while, right? A year or two, and then one day this Stranger shows up. Goes out to Ryan’s place and the dumb stray starts barking at this tresspaser and when Ryan goes out to see what’s got it riled up, there’s Jeremy.

There’s a whole hell of a lot less Drama this go around, because reasons.

Just Ryan and Jeremy and this scruffy stray.

A lot of talking and explaining - the same bit about Jeremy forced to work for the “good guys” to protect Ryan and how well that went, what with the whole fight and whatnot that led to Ryan living in this tiny little town somewhere.

Ryan’s kind of.

He’s just.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

If Jeremy’s there to kill him he’s going to find it harder to do than way back when, if hes not?

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

Jeremy is at a loss, but knows he wants to make amends - or something - with Ryan.

Gets a place of his own out there, rents out a room somewhere in town and goes out to Ryan’s all the fucking time.

Helps him with repairs around the place or with the garden he’s starting to grow some vegetables and the whatnot. Fishes and hunts and is just.

There.

Makes friends with the people in town, and Ryan feels this thing like annoyance/amusement when he realizes they’ve taken a liking to Jeremy. Cannot figure out how the hell he knows someone like Ryan or why they’re friends (are they?) and keeps quiet when they ask him about it.

This goes on for a long damn time, and Ryan’s just like wondering when Jeremy will get tired of it and move on, but he never does.

If Jeremy’s there to kill him, he’s doing a terrible job of it, isn’t he?

They’ve had Talks every now and then, hashing out what happened, what went wrong. Screamed and yelled and lost their tempers and broken down and just.Not all that fun, and yet Jeremy’s still fucking there.

Before he knows it there’s more of Jeremy’s stuff at his place than not, and the stray loves Jeremy and Ryan’s just.

Doesn’t know when that happened or when he stopped feeling wary of Jeremy being around (he does though, he so fucking does) and started feeling.

Not quite happy, but definitely something good to it.

It takes a long damn time for them to get around to realizing they’re going to be okay, all this shit where they have good days and bad ones. Longer still before the good ones outnumber the bad ones and some moment where Ryan kisses Jeremy without thinking.

Some sleepy morning, cold and brisk and winter coming on and the heat hasn’t kicked in yet and they’re shuffling around the kitchen. Moving around one another and Jeremy hands him a diet coke - would be coffee for any normal human, but Ryan still can’t stand coffee unless it’s heavily doctored with sugar and cream and whatever else and he still prefers his damn diet coke and Jeremy knows that.

Soft little smile and a murmured “thanks, Jeremy,” and absent kiss and Jeremy freezing because !!! that has Ryan ??? before he realizes.

And then he does, suddenly more awake as he looks down at Jeremy. Worried about having overstepped - he’s glad to have his friend back but doesn’t know if Jeremy wants them back, and did he fuck things up?

Jeremy snorts - that fond, exasperated thing - and makes a joke about Ryan just loving him for the diet coke, and trying to make light of it, let Ryan off the hook.

Ryan thinks about it for a moment, about letting this slide and pretending it never happened, but.

He’s happy, he realizes. Jeremy back in his life and this fragile trust their building between them again, and.

“I mean,” he says, “that’s one reason,” and is prepared for Jeremy to laugh and then go on with his business like nothing happened, but of course he doesn’t.

Just looks up at Ryan with all these FEELINGS in his eyes and.

“Oh, yeah?”

And Ryan is like, well, yeah.

Some dorks being dorks and then another kiss, helped along by the stray who runs into the room for the food Jeremy set out for him like the disaster it is. Knocks into Ryan in the process who stumbles into Jeremy who steadies him with his hands on his hips and this dumb smile at the stray’s antics, and looks up at Ryan who’s staring at him, and then another kiss happens because heart so full and all this FEELING and just.

Yes.

Much kissing and eventual happily ever after in this tiny little town in the middle of nowhere where they become the town’s old married couple.

Weird as hell and all the animals they end up adopting, because soft touches and neither of them able to tell the other no and mean it?

But also stupid in love and no one better to go to when a Situation crops up, as they’re wont to do a la movies where greedy assholes send thugs in to intimidate the locals and someone has to Take A Stand and just, idk, but pretty much every other episode of the A-Team tv show there ever was, because reasons. :D?

:D?????????????

[leverage-mytake]

S1E11: The Juror #6 Job

This episode was fun. Was nice to see Parker out of her comfort zone, and was funny to her forgetting Alice.

Eliot to Sophie about Parker: "You need to talk to her. This is not the first time she's gone loco"

............................

Parker and her interaction with other jurors lol

Parker: What'd you have for breakfast? You smell like gravy.

..................

This reminds me of Bull!!!! The earpieces and tech of the juror duty!

(I actually really liked the concept of Bull, but just hated Bull’s arrogance, anyway I digress)

....................

Aww and Sophie and Alec sticking up for Parker when she comes to them for help

Sophie: you know, she's never done that before. Nate: What, stormed out? Come on. Sophie: No, asked for our help. (walks out) (Nate looks toward Parker, then back at Hardison) Nate: What? Listen, there is a reason we put her in a jury trial. (Hardison mutes game) Hardison: You know, man, when I was a, when I was a kid, I was like 8 years old, I had a foster mom who was Jehovah’s witness. She used to dress me up in a suit and a bow tie and take me door-to-door to spread the word. Black neighborhoods, white neighborhoods, didn't matter. I would kick, I’d scream, or whatever, but she would say "Alec, you need to learn how to talk to people." See, everything I learned about people, I learned ringing doorbells and-and-and being in a bow tie. Parker never had that. I mean, jumping from a skyscraper, she's cool. But making small talk? It’s-it's like pure terror. Just cut her some slack.

:)

....................

GOOD ELI! TAKE YOUR BEER BACK!!!

Eliot: Tell you what, this is not happenin', bubba. You ain't takin' my beer.

......

And Eli and Parker team up! Yay! ha cute!

................

Hell yeah Parker was telling the truth! Take that Nate!

.........

Hardison: Hello. (looking at monitors) Earnshaw just ran a credit check on Alice White. Parker: Who's Alice White? Nate/Sophie: You are! Parker: Whoa!

Ha ha love this gag

....................

Eliot and Alec are well funny!!!

Eliot: It's your turn to be in the dumpster. Hardison: No, man, no. I-I have-I have peanut allergies. What if somebody threw in some extra crunchy Skippy? Then, you know, it's just a (wheezing) all up in my vocal area, man. Do you want to give me mouth-to-mouth? No, none of us want that. Hell no.

..............

The apple and orange persuasion sketch HAHAHAHAHHA

This is my favourite thing. EVER!

Sophie: Okay, today did not go well, but that's all right. You know, we learn when we fail. We're gonna-we're gonna go back to basics, and we're gonna do a little role-playing. Gonna start with-with persuasion techniques. So, Eliot (tosses him an apple) has an apple. Alice (tosses her an orange) has an orange. Eliot: I love apples. Apples are my favorite fruit. Parker: Good for you, sparky. Eliot (to Sophie): I-I don't have to sit here and take this crap. Sophie: Go on. Just do it for me. Eliot (to Parker): You have an orange, all right? Now, convince me that I want the orange, not the apple. I'm gonna take a bite. (slowly brings the apple to his mouth and takes a bite) Parker: I put a razor blade in that apple. Eliot (spits out the apple): Are you serious? Parker: Maybe. But do you know what doesn’t have a razor blade in it? This orange. (smells the orange) Don't you want it? (tosses the orange at Eliot and leaves) Sophie: You fell for that? (exits room)

Hahaha poor Eliot! Don’t blame him though! Parker could and would!

.........  ......

Parker and the stealing forman trick! Wowee!

...............

Parker: Wait! Wait a second. That was a secret. You just told me a secret, right? That's something friends do.

Peggy: Well, I guess so. You're the nicest one here.

Parker: Really? I mean, thanks.

Aww P ❤

..........................

Alec pretending to be a lawyer!

...................

Awwww man I love Parker! She's so cute!

....................

Nate: Now, listen, this is the middle game. This is where we trade pieces. We look for weaknesses. You have to buy Sophie a little more time to maneuver. Alec: I literally cannot make this slower or any more boring. Okay, y-you know why they say justice wears a blindfold? So you can't see that justice is asleep.

then

Hardison: Slide 162. This is-this is good stuff. Dr. Goldfarb, hi. Can you tell us how the chemicals work their way into the neurotransmitters? Judge (bored): Is this going anywhere, counselor? Hardison: Oh, I assure you, your honor, the next hundred slides are essential. 

HA

...........

HAHAHA Donnie! That was BRILL!!

............

AWW and I love Encouraging Nate and Sophie! They really are the parents!

Nate: A jury is 12 people. Just talk to them. You've been doing it your whole life. Just put on your bow tie and ring the doorbell. 

Sophie: Actually, Peggy is disgustingly normal. But the rest of them, they all have their own Alice White. You just, you just happened to give yours a name. 

.................

This whole scene!!!

Nate: Okay, we don't have court today, but we do have some work to do. Eliot: Am I gonna like this work? Nate: Uh, not the first part. 

................

ANd Nate in character! hA!

Nate: Are you kidding? I've been off the grid for years. Don't get me wrong. Electric car's a good way to start, but you can make fuel from your own bodily waste. Do you compost? The feeling when-when you close the digestive-to- internal combustion cycle, glorious.

..........................

Hardison: Oh, incident. Okay. (referring to file) Would that happen to be the incident on flight 732 out of St. Louis, where you-you fondled a flight attendant's buttocks? Or would that happen to be the incident on flight 1433 out of Chicago, where you drank 17 tiny margaritas, you took your pants off, you stood up on the drink cart, and you sang, quote, "I'm a sexy monkey"?

..............................

THE SWITCHING MONITERS THING! BRILL Hardison!!!

...............

And this whole interaction was just *chefs kiss*

Parker: Oh, sweet mercy, cooked flesh. (takes a bite of burger) Can we have fast food every time we make the bad guys go away? Nate: Did you realize what you just did? What you did? You won a jury trial without cheating. Hardison: Without chea--I hacked a government no-fly list and used it to humiliate a witness. Nate: Excessively. "Cheating excessively" is what I meant. But, I mean, think about it, I mean, if you applied yourself, Hardison, you could be anything you want. Hardison: You know what? I could. I could. You know, next week, I think I’m gonna be an astronaut. Nate: Well, that's not really what I meant. I meant if you studied, you’d-- Hardison: Yeah, if I--Who needs to study? You know, I’m gonna be a surgeon. A surgeon – ER. Surgeon. (Parker gets a text and checks her phone) Parker: Hey, it's Peggy from the trial! She wants to have coffee next week. Alice made a friend. Eliot: I'm gonna tell you one more time. You made a friend, not Alice. Parker: Oh, cool. Well, think she'd want to steal a painting with me? Sophie: Start small, Parker. Try coffee

.

[calpalirwin]

Pretty Girl, Handsome Boy

A/N: So Mikey has felt a little underappreciated in my opinion, so I did something about it. Enjoy!

And away, and away we go!

~~~

“Ah, shit! Fucker…” you grumbled, setting your controller down in frustration as you waited to respawn.

“Whoa, you’re a chick?”

“Fuck!” you grumbled again, fiddling with your headset. You hated when people found out you were a girl in the gaming universe, but you had forgotten to mute your mic before playing. 

The chat at the bottom of the game starting blowing up in the realization of a girl in their midst. The same shit you were used to- comments ranging from about how it made sense how much you sucked now to more lewd comments about other things you could suck. 

“Fuck this,” you said, picking up your controller to take yourself out of the game and find a new match. You reached up to hit the switch on your mic to mute yourself. 

A notification popped up in the corner of your screen to let you know someone by the tag Mikerowave_X had messaged you. 

“The fuck?” you said aloud, opening the notification. Why did that tag sound familiar?

Sorry about those assholes, the message read. 

Nah, it’s all good, you typed back, forgot I wasn’t muted. 

They’re still assholes. You were playing just fine. Better than some of them, even. 

Haha, thanks. 

I’m Mike, btw. 

I could tell. Clever name. What’s the X for?

It’s a Final Fantasy thing, lol. 

Sick! I’m Y/N. 

Nice to meet ya, Y/N. 

Nice to meet you too, Mike.

What else do you play?

Oh, loads of stuff. I’m not too picky. 

Cool. We should play sometime. 

For sure. I use the same gamer tag on all my accounts so just hit me up, you typed, not quite sure why you were opening yourself up to play with someone you didn’t know, but figuring if push came to shove you could always block the dude. But something told you you wouldn’t need to; that this Mike character was a good guy. 

You down to play something now or were you going offline for the day?

Nah, I was just switching matches. Can’t really play once people find out I’m a girl. Ruins it for me.

Is that why none of us can find the girl gamers on these things?

Just a gamer, Mike. A girl yeah. But a gamer just like you. We don’t call you guy gamers. 

Shit, my bad. But you’re for real a girl?

Nah, I’m a middle aged dude with the voice of a prepubescent boy. Yes I’m a girl. 

Just checking, damn… can’t be too careful these days. 

Says the one who’s prob a middle aged dude himself…

Lol, I’m 24. Swear. 

Prove it. 

For real? Hang tight then. 

A few moments later a picture of a boy with a hat covering his blonde hair, with the greenest eyes you’ve ever seen and beard stubble flashed on your screen, his phone with the date and time next to him for added proof. My mate took it so we could timestamp it for ya, the message below the picture said.

Damn… you typed, immediately recognizing him, all the pieces of the puzzle clicking together: his gamer tag, the use of X being a Final Fantasy reference. No fuckin way...

Haha, like what you see?

As far as nerds go, yeah, you’re kinda hot, you responded trying to keep your cool. 

Lol, I got a song by that name. Well almost. 

Yeah, I know. 

Oh? You good?

I’m a little stunned, you admitted. 

Lol why?

Cuz you’re Michael fuckin Clifford

It’s Gordon actually. But yeah, so?

Michael fuckin Clifford is messaging me… fuckin hell this is wild!

Shh, don’t blow my cover. I’m just a gamer, yeah?

Just a gamer, yeah, okay. 

Can I get a pic of you? Shit, not like that… I just meant… ah fuck…

Lol, it’s fine. Gimme a sec. If Michael fuckin Clifford wanted a picture of you, you were gonna give him a picture. You tried to do a cute, goofy pose with your tongue poking out, making sure your TV screen with the date and time was visible in the background. Shit, that’s awful, you typed as you sent the picture to him. 

Damn…

Haha, like what you see? you teased, using his words against him

Very much so, Y/N, very much so. How old are you, btw?

Same as you, 24. 

Yeah?

What, wanna see my license for proof? I don’t lie, Mike.

Nah, you just hide that you’re a girl. 

I don’t hide it. It’s visible on my profile. I just keep a gender neutral gamer tag. Keeps the assholes away. 

Damn, defensive. I was joking Y/N. 

Oh… so you serious about playing a game sometime?

Hell yeah, I’m serious. But, I actually gotta go. Famous duty calls. 

Oh, alright. See you around then. 

See ya, pretty girl. 

Bye, handsome boy. 

~~~

You played with Mike for the next few months every time he was on. You didn’t admit it in your messages to each other, but your heart sank when you would see he was offline and it did a little jump when he was. Unbeknownst to you, his heart was having the same reaction. 

Hey, pretty girl? he typed about 4 months after the first message. 

You heart leapt in your throat. You loved that he had deemed you “pretty girl” although again, you’d never admit it. 

Yeah, handsome boy? you typed back, using his deemed nickname in response. 

We’re getting back in town here in a few days. Was wondering if we could meet up in person?

Really?

Yeah. I feel like we’ve gotten to know each other pretty well these past few months. Why not?

I don’t want to disappoint you…

Disappoint me? Aw, pretty girl…

I’m a nerd, handsome boy. What you see is what you get. No surprises. 

Pretty girl, that could never disappoint me. 

You sighed. Alright, name the time and place and I’ll be there. 

~~~

You walked into the arcade, double-checking that you were in the right place. “Pretty girl?” a scruffy voice sounded from behind you. 

You turned and looked up at the blonde-haired, green-eyed boy who had his arms open for a hug.  “Handsome boy,” you greeted, accepting his hug. You smiled into his chest as his arms enveloped you. Damn he felt good. “So, an arcade, huh?” you asked once you let go of each other. 

“Figured it’d make a good first date,” he winked. 

“Date?” You quirked an eyebrow at him, hands going to your hips. You weren’t dressed for a date. You had spent the better part of your morning deciding what to wear before opting for a simple black t-shirt and jeans. Every day attire, not first date attire. 

“Well yeah? What did you think this was?”

“2 friends meeting up?”

“Pretty girl…” he sighed, rubbing his temple. “Look, I’m not good at these things okay? Ash is the…”

“Wordsmith,” you nodded. “I know. Ash is the wordsmith, Cal’s the squishy cheeks who hates love, Luke’s hungover Jesus, and you’re the gamer. I know.”

He let out a small chuckle, “Yeah. But, I like you, okay? I don’t call just anyone ‘pretty girl’. In fact, you’re the only one I call that.”

“Well, I like you too, Mike, but…”

“But what? Is this too real for you now?” His voice wasn’t angry, it was almost sad. Like he was scared he was losing you. Which he was. He had grown attached to you and he wanted more than a gaming friendship with you. And here he was, ruining it. So typical. 

“A little?” you admitted, trying to find the words. “I mean, before… you were handsome boy and I was pretty girl. And… and that was enough for me. But now… you’re here. In front of me. And you’re him. You’re Michael fuckin Clifford…”

“It’s Gordon, actually,” he half-joked. “But, Y/N, that doesn’t change anything. I’m still handsome boy, and you’re still pretty girl. What you see is what you get, right? No surprises?”

“Yeah, but you’re you! Like actually you! And I’m… I’m me. And people like me don’t go on dates with people like you.”

He pursed his lips together, a wave of emotion coursing through him. He was angry, yes. But more than that, he was hurt. Hurt that he had hurt you by trying to get close to you. Hurt himself by making himself vulnerable. Maybe this is why Calum hated love so much. This shit hurt. 

You looked up at him, as his face tried to process your words and his feelings towards you. You could see the pain etched in his face. “Mike,” you said softly, reaching out to touch his arm. “This has nothing to do with you, okay? I like you. A lot, if I’m being honest. But, I’m scared, okay? I’m not blind to your professional life and what that entails. It was easier before. I could ignore that you were you and just pretend you were just Mike, my friend in the gaming world. But this?” you gestured with your hands. “Well, my world’s spinning a little too fast.”

“I’m still him, Y/N…”

“You are. But you’re also not,” you said sadly, thinking that this is exactly why you weren’t supposed to meet your idols. 

“God, that’s such bullshit… I’m me, Y/N!” he shouted suddenly, his voice ringing out around you. “I’m still the dude who messaged you to apologize for assholes who think that just because you’re a girl gives them a free pass to make a pass at you. I’m the same guy you’ve been talking to for months. I’m still the same guy in the picture when you knew who I really was. And I’m still here, in front of you, trying to ask the girl I like on a date.”

“Mike… I…” you sputtered. It was too real. It was too real that he was right here in front of you. The feelings you had for him were too real. This was just… too much too fast. 

“Look me in the eye and tell me I’m not the same person you’ve gotten to know these last 4 months,” he challenged you. 

“Mike, it’s not that simple, and you know it!” You were doing what you did best, closing yourself off so you couldn’t disappoint anyone.

“Bullshit, it isn’t! Look, if this is about you being scared of disappointing me I got news for ya: you don’t. I meant every word I’ve ever said to you.”

“Mike…” you said, your voice breaking. “I can’t be the girl you want me to be. I just can’t, okay?”

“I only ever wanted you to be you…”

“And I am!”

“And that’s enough for me! Can’t you see that? Haven’t I proved that to you?”

“It’s clearly not enough if you want to date me, Mike…”

“Pretty girl, I want to date you because you’re enough. It’s not easy for me to open up to people, okay? I’m not like Ash, I can’t just make myself vulnerable and pass it off as charm. I’m not like Cal who just passes his feelings off as indifference. I’m not a cute dork like Luke. I’m just nerdy ole me who likes nerdy ole you a hell of a lot. You have made these past few months away from home more bearable than I can put into words. Yes, I love my job. I love what I do, and wouldn’t trade it for anything. But it gets lonely. And it gets hard. But when I was with you, I felt at home. Like for once in my life there was someone to come home to. And that’s not a feeling I want to let go of. If this is too much, that’s fine. I get it. I have a tendency of coming on a little strong because I don’t know how to open up, so when I do it’s like an avalanche. If we need to go back to just being gaming friends, I guess I’ll find a way to be okay with that. But I like you, okay? You feel like home to me and I just need you to know that.”

“Mike… I don’t think that’s what it means to like someone…” you said, once he was done giving a voice to all the feelings you’d been having yourself. “Pretty sure that’s love.”

“Oh… well, fuck, maybe I love you then, pretty girl.”

“Maybe I love you too, handsome boy,” you said before reaching up to touch his cheek, needing to look at those green eyes of his.

“Maybe?” he said softly, as his gaze locked with yours, the tip of his tongue poking out to wet at his lips.

“Maybe,” you nodded, before your lips touched his.

[thelazyeye]

hey idk if you're taking requests right now but if you are could you write something about one of them getting their wisdom teeth taken out (being high af after lol) and the other taking care of them? either way thank u and you're a great writer !!

First, THANK YOU SO MUCH AHHHH. 

I don’t know if you wanted a prompt or a drabble, but you got a whole ass mini fic out of me, so I hope you’re happy :P  I love this prompt super much, thank you for sending it in!!!

Read here or below the cut!

Richie was…. A handful to say the least. When Eddie offered to take him up on being his Little Nurse, he didn’t expect it to be a full-time job. Richie had come to him practically begging to be taken care of. Oh please, Eds, please. I couldn’t possibly trust anyone else with my life. You’re my nurse! You always take care of me! Please, please help me!

God, what a fool he’d been.

Richie’s wisdom teeth removal had gone off without a problem, despite Richie’s constant yammering about how he would surely meet his maker in that operation room. Now, he’s currently positioned in the front seat of Eddie’s car with his head lolled against the window and gauze bandages stuffed in his mouth.

Getting him out of the hospital had been… a process to say the least. He flirted with everything in sight, but mostly Eddie. Eddie pretended not to notice the way Richie was making grabby hands at him more than the nurses, or how his droll always seemed to fall in Eddie’s direction. He tried even harder not to notice how Richie asked for the nurses’ numbers. He tried not to notice anything because everything made him uncomfortable. And that was what he tried not to notice most of all.

That was another thing, too. Drool is a loose term. It was more like opaque blood. The doctor had to hand Eddie a barf bag and guide him through some breathing techniques so he didn’t have a full-blown panic attack. He doesn’t even have wisdom teeth, why the hell didn’t anyone warn him how disgusting it would be?

“’eh, Eh-duh,” Richie’s muffled voice effectively shakes Eddie from his thoughts. He glances over to find Richie facing him, cheeks swollen out like a chipmunks and eyes completely glazed over, “Ah luh yuh.”

“I love you, too, Richie,” Eddie says back, turning back and keeping his eyes on the road. He does love Richie, but right now he can hardly look at him. It’s a mixture of the gross way Richie’s facial fluids are falling out of him and the way his heart seems to shake in his chest.

Why the fuck is this happening now, of all times? Richie has been nothing but annoying since they left the hospital. Eds, can we get Planet Smoothie? Eds, can we get ice cream? Eds, can you hold my hand?

Eddie struck down each and every one of Richie’s outlandish requests – except the hand holding one, but that was only because he had to practically carry Richie into his car.

Richie doesn’t respond. He just turns back to the window and watches their neighborhood pass them by. Eddie can see Richie’s house in the distance but he wants to turn around, circle the block a few more times before he has to help Richie up and into his bedroom. He doesn’t want to feel the way his skin lights on fire when Richie touches him. He doesn’t care for the way his breath quickens or how his heart speeds up. 

Fuck all of this, honestly.

Eddie doesn’t have time to consider circling the block in a serious way because Richie starts yelling, “Ho, ho!” which Eddie can only assume means ‘home’ through the gauze in his mouth.

He begrudgingly pulls into the driveway and cuts the engine, “Alright Richie, ready for bed?”

Richie, thank god, opts for a nod instead of spitting more bloody fluid over the dashboard of his car and Eddie gets out and goes around to help him. He can’t ignore the way Richie leans into him when he reaches across Richie’s waist to unbuckle the seatbelt.

“Alright, up and at ‘em,” he grunts as he grabs Richie’s arm and hoists him out of the car. Richie practically flops like a ragdoll into Eddie and sends them both stumbling onto the driveway. “C’mon, Rich, I need you to work with me here.”

Richie doesn’t.

He makes getting inside as hard as it could possibly be and Eddie is sweating by the time they’re up to the second level of the house. He’s huffing and grunting and Richie is fucking giggling like an idiot the entire fucking time. Once they’re inside, Eddie all but tosses Richie’s limp body onto the bed.

“Fuck you, Rich,” He murmurs as he leans down to untie each converse and slip them off Richie’s feet. He pays little attention to the way Richie shifts and moves on the bedspread until he hears Richie’s voice, clear as day even through the heavy medication.

“My Eds is so good to me. I’m so lucky to have such a kind, perfect boy –”

“Richie, your gauze, you need to put it back in!”

“– There’s no one I’d rather have here in my room with me. God, I love him so much. I wish he knew –”

“Hey, stop, come on!”

If Richie hears him, he certainly pays zero attention to the way Eddie chastises him. His eyes are closed and his brows are furrowed in what looks like either a look of real concentration or pain. Maybe both. Probably both, considering he just had four rather large teeth ripped out of his skull.

“– He has no idea. No clue. My Eds, so smart and wonderful and silly and stupid. No – wait. That’s me. I’m stupid.”

Concern floods Eddie’s system as he stands up on his knees and leans towards Richie. “Whoa, Rich. What are you talking about?”

“My Eds,” Richie fully whines into the bed. His eyes are still clenched up but Eddie swears he can see tears forming at the corners. “He doesn’t love me!”

“Richie, hey, no way. He totally loves you. He’s your best friend. He loves you lots,” Eddie coos. He smooths his hand over Richie’s back in an attempt to calm him but it only seems to work him up further.

“No! No, he doesn’t!” He kicks his feet out like a petulant child and Eddie has to move slightly closer to the top of the bed to avoid being struck.

“He does, Richie. I promise you.” Eddie brings his hand up to Richie’s hair and digs his fingers into the scalp in that gentle way he knows Richie loves. Richie’s distress is alarming and it’s burrowing into Eddie’s own. He can’t stand to see Richie like this, upset because of something relating to Eddie. Eddie never wants to be that. He never wants to cause Richie distress and upset and sadness. He only wants to be happiness and love and – and. Fucking hell he wants to be love. “Sh, it’s okay.”

“He doesn’t and I’m so stupid for wanting him to!” Richie sobs. His chest shakes and Eddie can see blood starting to come out of his mouth with the motion. Eddie knows he needs to get that gauze back into Richie’s mouth but his desperate need to console Richie overpowers that. “I love him and I want him to love me and that makes me stupid.” Richie’s voice calms down from a manic cry to a slurred lull. His body begins to still and Eddie just sits there and stares at Richie. The room goes completely silent, neither of them so much as breathing until Richie whispers, “I’m so, so in love with him and he doesn’t even know it.”

What?

Richie loves him? Richie’s in love with him? What the actual fuck?

Eddie doesn’t reply. He doesn’t move, fingers stilled in Richie’s hair and eyes glued to the wall next to the bed. He says like that for five, maybe ten minutes. Long enough for Richie to fall asleep and his tears to dry on his face. Long enough for Richie to snore slightly, drool and blood collecting on his pillow case and – fuck. Eddie’s going to need to clean that up.

Eddie’s going to need to clean all of this up, isn’t he?

[ice-cream-nekogirl]

Chocolate Milk and a Sharky Smile (Kirishima Eijirou x Reader)

Summary: You find yourself in Kirishima’s bed after a bad night of drinking no thanks to some so-called friends, and he’s so nice you can’t help but fall for him.

Hehe I totally alluded to Happy Death Day, cuz I love that movie lol sue me

And I used italics for the characters’ inner thoughts that the reader, a.k.a You, can read, and the reader here is kinda chubby I forgot to mention that in the title.

Warning: This one contains some somewhat graphic imagery of attempted sexual assault and may have some other triggering material in it that refer to sexual assault, depression, anxiety, panic attacks, bullying and fat-shaming.

Featuring: Best Boy Kirishima!

Isn’t anyone tryin’ to find me? Won’t somebody come take me home It’s a damn cold night Trying to figure out this life Won’t you take me by the hand Take me somewhere new I don’t know who you are But I, I’m with you

‘I’m With You’ by Avril Lavigne

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_qHWIvq_WR4

Mind-reading. What a terrible quirk.

You swear you would rather be quirkless than be stuck with the current quirk you had. You hated it, because while your friend Shinsou told you it was useful for gathering information on villains and people, it made you useless in combat and on top of that it made it near impossible for you to trust people. Since you could sense and hear their intentions, and you didn’t trust easily either so it just made everything more difficult in your life.

Countless people pretended to be nice to you and you heard it in their heads. Which is why you couldn’t believe that you let yourself fall for this so-called guy-friend of yours’ tricks. Initially you had been keen on him, but now that he pressured you into coming to this wild party you were currently at, not anymore.

“Go on… drink it…”

You should have known better, but for some reason you let the peer pressure from him and some of your other so-called girl-friends pressure you. His name was Mageru, and he was a handsome boy with a fairly strong binding quirk in your General Studies class, but those good looks meant nothing to you anymore after he brought you to this party that you just wanted to leave. As soon as he guilt-tripped you into going, you didn’t have a choice.

But now you were miserable and being forced to down drink after drink just to please some of the nastier peers who looked at you with judgmental eyes as you felt dizzy from all the alcohol in your system as you reluctantly downed another cup of whatever that was getting you drunk.

And your mind-reading quirk didn’t do anything to help you as the voices grew louder in your head, even though many of them were drunk they were still way too loud for you and giving you such a headache. After a while you couldn’t take it anymore and stumbled your way out of there, unaware that you were being followed by the jerk you had no idea why you even liked in the first place. You never should have had those drinks because now your mind was too hazy that everything in your path looked like blurred mist as you focused on your surroundings. You were close to UA, so that meant home wasn’t too far…

“Heeeey…” But then you heard an unwanted voice slur into your ear as you realized that he had yanked your body into his, with a low groan you tried to pry him off you. “I gotta go home…” You shook your head, even if you were drunk you managed to at least say that, but he wasn’t nearly as drunk as you were, and clearly willing to use your intoxication for all it was worth for him.

“Aww c’mon (Y/N)… I invited you for a reason. So you can have fun! Don’t be a goddamn prude… let me take care of ya… I know how to make a pretty girl feel comfy…” Mageru held you closer, against your will as he wrapped one of his arms around your waist, attempting to sneak his fingers under your jeans and used his binding quirk to keep you against him tightly as you groaned at the discomfort as your legs buckled while you tried to get away.

“The guys… they want to come by too…” He said softly, and you heard more footsteps approaching, and as you blinked and narrowed your eyes in an attempt to see better, at least 2 more guys showed up, and they were wearing different school uniforms, very unlike your UA uniform.

‘Heh, she’s drunk enough…’

‘We might not get another chance…’

It became clear to you what they wanted from you based on their thoughts alone.

“I wanna go… let me go…” You muttered weakly as he didn’t loosen his grip on you. He wasn’t going to. “Oh no you can’t go. Not yet… you’re here to have a good time, and we’re gonna show you a good time okay stop being such a-“

“I said… LET ME GO!!”

Suddenly you shouted as loud as you could, forcefully pulling yourself away from him and distracting him as he released you once the force surprised him. Mageru growled as you hit the cold, hard concrete ground and tried to crawl away, but someone had taken a hold of your legs. “H-Hey…!” You tried to yell again, but your mind was so unfocused that it felt like everything was so distorted and you couldn’t help yourself.

“C’mon man this is a good spot.” One of his friends said, the other one grabbing his phone as your former friend knelt beside you and the third one was getting out his phone to record what they were about to do with an insidious grin. “See? We’re having fun already.” Mageru’s smile turned into a smirk as his friend held you down and then you felt the guy unbuttoning your jeans and their thoughts started ringing in your head when they held you down.

‘Oh yeah I’ve been waiting to get all up in this…’

‘I’m showin’ this to the rest of the guys later…’

‘This is some fine stuff right here…’

“No… no stop…” You shook your head, wiggling your legs and trying to kick away, but without strength as you tried to get up but then your ex friend just pinned you down with his palm to your head, pressing you against the grass as his friend started lowering your pants to expose your panties as you felt tears spring to your eyes as you kept shaking your head.

“No… No, no…!”

“HEY! What the hell are you guys doing?!” You heard another voice, another male, except this one sounded much more indignant as the three students flinched when caught in the act as the third guy dropped his phone in alarm. “Shit…!” He exclaimed, and quickly ran away as fast as he could.

“Ehhh…? Hey bud get outta here… this is none of your business, we’re just havin’ fun…” Mageru attempted to warn the person who had come just in time, you tried to make him out. The first thing you registered was his spiky red hair, and his angry expression complete with sharp teeth he bore. You couldn’t see how disgusted he looked; he wasn’t fooled at all by Mageru.

“That’s bullshit. You get off of her. Right now.” He said in a deadly serious tone as Mageru kept his hand on your head so you would stay down. But then Mageru’s second friend suddenly tried to attack the redhead with a punch, but he reacted fast by grabbing his fist and punching him square in the jaw, effectively knocking him out as he shouted and hit the ground. Leaving Mageru alone as he slowly let go of you, nervously grinning with his hands up.

“Come on now… we came from a party… we were havin’ fun…” He claimed, even though all the redhead could see was that you were in no position to fight back or even run away from these bastards who wanted to take advantage you.

“Yeah right. I know what you fuckers were trying to do. What kind of punks just corner a drunk girl?!” His fists shook, and Mageru took that as a challenge in his drunken mind.

“Fine… comin’ in to ruin my good time?! Fuckin’ Mr. Goody Goody Two Shoes?!” He shouted and let you go as he shot forward to try and shove the guy but was instantly met with a hardened fist to the face. A loud crack was heard, and then for extra measure he delivered a swift, fierce kick to the stomach as Mageru cried out, holding his bleeding nose and likely bruised stomach as he fell to the grass and pathetically groaned in pain.

“D-Damn you…!” He shouted, you swore he was starting to cry like a little bitch as he started to try and scurry away like a little cockroach before the other guy could beat him up any further.

‘These assholes… trying to take advantage a helpless girl… they’re disgraces to men…’

You heard the redhead’s thoughts as you slowly picked yourself up after you were finally freed from those bastards’ hold on you. Clumsily, you groaned and tried to stand up, but your lack of coordination and pants around your ankles made you stumble, and before you could hit the ground, a pair of strong arms suddenly caught you, saving you from a hard fall.

“N-No…” You shook your head, unsure to trust this person because you just escaped from a pervert’s arms, but this one didn’t feel like he was a pervert, and you could tell because he wasn’t being forceful.

“Hey, hey whoa, whoa it’s okay...! It’s okay... take it easy now...”

Was this the same person? His voice became much softer as you tried to get a better look at him. Red eyes that had taken a softer look compared to the fury he had earlier. “It’s okay I won’t hurt you I promise.” He spoke again, as you tilted your head slightly in confusion. God you were so drunk… but this stranger helped you, that much you could make out.

“Hi… my name’s Kirishima. I’ve seen you around maybe once or twice, aren’t you in the General Studies class?” Kirishima. So that was his name. You weren’t so sure you would remember it because you were so out of it, but you nonetheless smiled because this fella just saved you.

“Mmm… Kirishima…” Groaning tiredly, you said his name and leaned against him as he held you up, and you could hear him stuttering awkwardly as you suddenly put your arms around him for support, unable to use your legs because your brain was beginning to tell you it was time to sleep. “I’m (Y/N)… uh-huh… gen studs… tha’s me a’ight…”

“(Y/N) huh? I-It’s nice to officially meet you…” He sounded a little nervous, because you were so close to him and you giggled and pressed your cheek against your savior’s warm cheek. “You saved my life… y-you’re in the hero course right…? I see why… you’re nice…” You slurred quietly but you were close enough to Kirishima’s face to hear you as he cringed at the smell of alcohol on your breath. Although it just made him madder because he had (correctly) assumed that those fuckers forced you to drink this much since you were on the verge of passing out. It was a good thing he came outside for a nighttime stroll, because he didn’t want to imagine what could have happened if you did pass out and they had gotten to you.

“Take me with you… ‘m tired… sleepy… please? Can I come with you…? I wanna go with ya… i’s late… got class tuhmorrow… I got class…” You started to close your eyes, quietly yawning as Kirishima almost looked conflicted but there was no way he was going to leave you all alone while you were drunk like this. He had to take you home, and make sure you don’t trip, hurt yourself or choke on your own vomit.

‘Man those bastards… she’s out of it bad, ugh she stinks of booze…’

“Shuddup…!” You suddenly exclaimed in a sleepy tone since you could still hear his thoughts, much to his confusion because he wasn’t aware of your quirk. “I-I didn’t say anything…”

‘I am NOT leaving her alone… I don’t want to risk letting something happen to her while she’s like this… I’m taking her with me! It’s the manly thing to do after all!’

His thoughts were loud enough for you to hear as he carefully picked you up and you laughed quietly, at this point you trusted this person because he wasn’t hurting you. “Whee…” You smiled wide and felt yourself beginning to fall asleep in this stranger’s arms. “G’night Kirishima…”

He smiled sympathetically, “I’ve got you (Y/N)… I won’t let anyone else try and hurt you tonight…” Kirishima said to you gently as he carried you while you snuggled into him, loving how warm and soft he felt in this damn cold night.

However, Kirishima was feeling a little nervous at how close you were getting to him. He didn’t dare cross his boundaries though. He was going to take you to his dorm and give you a bed to sleep on, because although he wanted to take you home he had no idea where you lived, and he wasn’t going to get an address from you anytime soon once he noticed that you fell asleep in his arms…

“It’s okay (Y/N). You’ll be okay…” He said to you softly as he carried you off to Height’s Alliance, giving brief explanations to some of his classmates who started asking him questions, at least the ones who were still awake.

Next Morning brought to you by Evanescence’s 'WAKE ME UP’

Dreamland was dissipating before your eyes. At least until you realized your eyes were closed, and a sudden surge of agony began pulsing through your head as you kept your eyes shut. And then everything came back to you from the night before.

You got totally drunk no thanks to your so-called friends and Mageru tried something funny with you, at least until a boy from the Hero Course came in, but afterwards you just saw him and then afterwards everything was all black. So you assumed that was when you promptly passed out.

This wasn’t your bed. It didn’t feel like your bed, and yet it was so soft with a unique scent that you almost didn’t want to get out of it. And on top of that you didn’t really want to know where you had ended up after passing out, but an angry boy shouting in the distance was impossible to not hear.

“SHUT UP!!”

Well that officially woke you up. Now you couldn’t go back to sleep even if you wanted to, but you instantly regretted cracking your eyes open, your vision still blurred. It hurt for you to even blink, but you knew it was time to figure out where you were at even if you didn’t want to. Slowly, you picked yourself up from the bed you were in, letting your eyes adjust to the light. You were thankful for the slightly dimmed room as you looked around to see the place.

Lot of posters that seemed to be motivational, a punching bag, well that was cool. And some merchandise of that Crimson Riot pro-hero that you had recalled when your dad mentioned him once. This was definitely a guy’s room it seemed. And your thoughts were proven correct when you saw the person from yesterday, standing up and buttoning up his school uniform’s shirt before he suddenly noticed that you were awake and looking right at him.

“Oh! You’re up! Good morning!” He said to you politely and enthusiastically with a bright smile, but you just stared and frowned in confusion. Trying to remember his name, and it came to you after you stared at his face for a little bit to recall what he had told you last night.

“Kirishima?” You asked, and his smile grew as he nodded, “Yeah! You remember! I was almost worried you wouldn’t. You were pretty out of it last night…” Kirishima didn’t mean to sound so blunt, but it was true, and you knew it. But then you looked around and you saw a blanket and pillow on the floor, and it suddenly dawned on you. This was the Height’s Alliance for the Hero course students. You didn’t belong here.

“Am I in your dorm room…?” You then asked as the redhead’s smile slowly fell upon seeing how… surly you looked. He assumed that you were either remembering everything that happened last night or completely forgot about everything that happened last night.

“Y-Yeah… I… I didn’t know where you lived, so I brought you here to let you have a place to sleep.” He replied somewhat nervously as you gave a disappointed sigh, unable to believe that you had been stupid enough to give into peer pressure and drink so much. Now here you were, in a stranger’s dorm room that you had slept in too because he was kind enough to let you have his bed while he slept on the floor. God you felt like such a burden, but you couldn’t let this person know, you weren’t in the mood to be pitied or judged by anyone. In fact, you weren’t in any mood at all.

So you got up, gasping quietly upon seeing that you were only wearing panties and a large red shirt with the word ‘Motivation’ on it. The panties were yours but the shirt definitely didn’t belong to you. Your eyes beginning to widen when a few scenarios came to your head, feeling heat involuntarily creeping on your face.

“I-I called one of the girls to help put that on you!” He quickly exclaimed once he saw your expression, having called on Mina last night over to his room to come and help him take off your clothes to change you into one of his shirts, and she did so gladly to help. “I swear! I would never change a girl’s clothes… I-I mean unless I had to but I didn’t wanna seem like a weirdo..” You saw his cheeks starting to turn a little red, and as much as you didn’t want to believe him, there was nothing in his mind that hinted any dishonesty.

'Man I hope she doesn’t think I’m a pervert or something… that’s the last thing she wants to be around after last night…’

You said nothing even though he was talking and thinking, and you nearly cringed just remembering that you were nearly sexually assaulted last night by perverts. This guy however was clearly no pervert, but you were relieved to know that he at least got a girl to remove your clothes to put you in something more comfortable. But it was time for you to get out of it so you can just go to class and try to forget that this ever happened.

Without much shame, you lifted the larger shirt off yourself, exposing your (F/C) bra and (B/T) body (that you hated) to the boy in front of him as he let out a small yelp of surprise, quickly looking away with a heavy blush spread across his face, now looking quite flustered. “B-But I uh, folded your shirt and pants… I was sure you probably wouldn’t wanna wake up in day clothes…” He then pointed to your school uniform (and your jeans) that was on his desk, and you quickly grabbed them to start putting them on while Kirishima politely kept his eyes averted. It was actually pretty cute.

“I gotta get out of here… don’t mention this to anyone. All right?” You almost regretted how rude you sounded, but after the night you had and the hangover that was making your brain feel like it was being squeezed like a stress-ball, you just wanted to forget everything that happened.

“O-Oh… y-yeah no problem. Got it…” He stuttered a bit but didn’t argue with you because he was sure this was a lot to process.

“It’s all right now.” You put your pants and shoes back on and affirmed to him that you were decent and Kirishima turned to face you, his cheeks and ears still a bit flushed.

“Thanks I guess. I’m going to class now.” Without another word, you neglected to properly thank him, but Kirishima didn’t expect a thanks or anything. He wasn’t the type who expected anything in return after doing things for someone, but he was still kinda worried about how you must be feeling now that you were back in your right mind.

“Oh. Okay, yeah I’m gonna get ready too… maybe I’ll see you around?” He smiled at you, which confused you as you just carelessly shrugged your shoulders and furrowed your brows as you approached the door, which suddenly opened itself as you and Kirishima were greeted two more teenage males: A blonde boy and a small boy with weird purple balls for hair that resembled large grapes.

“Dude! How’d it go with that girl last…” The blonde somewhat loudly asked but stopped right at the end of his sentence as soon as he was met with your unfamiliar face as he awkwardly looked at you.

“Kirishima! I heard you brought a girl home and she’s sleeping in your bed?! You damn lucky bastard why do all of you guys get the girls so close to you?!” Mineta angrily asked with tears in his eyes as he finally took notice of you, his eyes widening with a lust that made you wanna gouge his eyes out. He would have tried to touch you, but the fire in your eyes was enough to terrify him into silence as he and Kaminari both got out of your way.

A look of disgust overcame your already sullen features as you glared at them, looking over at an embarrassed Kirishima as he nervously glanced at you.

“I’m… I’m sorry…” He tried to apologize on behalf of his friends, but you just smiled condescendingly at him before walking past the scared grape-haired boy and electric blonde with a scowl as you tried to find the way out of this building as fast as possible with your shoes in your hand.

“Nice one you dickheads! Way to make her feel uncomfortable!” Kirishima angrily scolded his friend and classmate, although only Kaminari really had the grace to look ashamed while Mineta just looked scared that he had angered both his classmate and a pretty girl.

You got out as fast you could, trying to ignore the way some of the other Hero course students had stopped to stare and glance over at you, including that rich girl, another girl with weird ear thingies, a girl who had a frog-face, a guy with black hair, Endeavor’s kid, the younger brother of the former hero Ingenium, the green-haired kid you remembered from the Sports Festival who beat Shinsou, the brunette girl with that gravity quirk and there was the winner of the Sports Festival himself. It was clear that they knew you didn’t belong here, and it was so embarrassing for you because you were a hundred percent sure that you looked horrible with your disheveled hair, bloodshot eyes that adorned heavy bags under them. At least your clothes were nicely folded thanks to Kirishima.

'It’s the girl Mina told me about… she doesn’t look so good…’

'Wow she looks terrible…’

'Probably had too much alcohol last night.’

'Dang, what happened to her?’

'Hm. So this is the girl.’

'He broke a few rules but Kirishima did the right thing…’

'O-Oh boy. She does not look happy at all… I hope she’s all right…’

'I wonder if we should help…’

'So Kirishima dragged in this extra huh?’

Their thoughts each came to you one by one, making your already aching head throb as you clutched at the side of your head with an irritated groan and glared at the ones who dared to gawk at you. “Shut the fuck up. All of you. I can’t hear myself think… and no I don’t need your goddamn help… I can get out of here myself…” You bitterly muttered to the Hero Course students, many of them (sans Endeavor’s kid) looking a bit confused and somewhat put off by your behavior. They had held their tongue so they didn’t know why you reacted like that, and you weren’t going to tell them that it was just your quirk. However, the Sports Festival winner was pissed by what you said and wasn’t going to tolerate that.

“HEY! What was that you wasted extra?!” He shouted, looking livid and glared at you but you kept walking with your back turned. So that was the guy who woke you up by shrieking not too long ago. As a small form of revenge, while you walked you brought your arm out and stuck your middle finger out to him, which just pissed him off even more as he tried to go after you, but you didn’t see the green-haired kid and Ingenium’s brother holding him back. “WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE YOU LOSER?! GET BACK OVER HERE SO I CAN KILL YOU!!”

You almost snickered at how loud that one was, and you were kinda glad that you irritated him like that. And you were kinda glad that you confused them all too when you read their thoughts and neglected telling them that you could read minds. They didn’t need to know, bunch of big shots, they probably felt so proud of themselves that one of their students decided to help poor, defenseless you.

Somewhat angrily, you walked out as quickly as you could and left the building. So far, today was shitty and you REALLY didn’t want to attend class today. Alas, life didn’t work that way, so once you got into the school building you went into the bathroom to at least try and look good by fixing up your hair as best as you could and washed your face so you didn’t look completely like shit. There was nothing you could really do to stop feeling like shit though.

After 15 minutes, you got out to go and head to your class but then a snobby voice made you pause. “Oh my gosh. Well if it isn’t the sneaky little bitch herself. Rad party last night huh? Not that great but still good right?” A pretty, slim girl with lovely dark brown hair and a fair amount of make-up had asked you, Hiromi was her name. She wasn’t exactly your friend, more like your frenemy because she was the snobbiest, most vapid girl in UA whose quirk allowed her to always look beautiful and make ugly things beautiful which gave her SUCH an ego. And on top of that she was SO annoying a good 90 percent of the time. “Who took you home last night? I can tell by the way you look like shit that someone was nice enough to take you home. And maybe a little something else~?” She asked with a smirk but you just chuckled and shook your head.

“God no. Nobody took me home, I mean come on look at me…” You defeated yourself a little bit, and there was no way you were going to tell her that a guy from the Hero Course had taken you to HIS dorm last night. That sweet guy from the Hero Course…

“Yeah. Actually you’re right, what was I thinking?” She snickered a bit, making you give her a fake laugh just to humor her. She never had anything nice to say about you as she frequently insulted your eating habits, weight and style of dress. Why were you friends with her again? “So like, I don’t know what happened, but Mageru’s not here today. Apparently he needed to go to the hospital cuz of a broken nose. You should see him now it’s hilarious.” Hiromi started to laugh and your eyes widened a little bit. Not remembering just how much Kirishima had beaten the guy, but the more you thought about it, the more you started to smile. That prick deserved it, but now you really felt bad for not giving Kirishima more of a thanks since he did that for you.

“Anyway. Meet us at lunch, I wanna discuss how to make our class look better. Ever since that purple-haired weirdo left I’m pretty confident that our class can finally look good.” She said and you rolled your eyes. Just like with you, Hiromi was never nice to Shinsou, always insulting his looks, his insomnia and his tastes in music, even though the boy never paid her any mind as you tended to defend him from her, and then she insulted you a lot more because you were actually on good terms with the guy. Unlike Hiromi, you were sad when he was able to join the Hero Course. Well you were happy that he would finally get to do what he wanted, but you were also sad that you lost the only person in your class that you didn’t want to punch in the throat.

And now you had to go to lunch with the rest of your so-called friends. At least Mageru wasn’t going to be there. You were SO going to Principal Nezu later to tell him about how he tried to sexually assault you later today.

…

Time seemed to just dredge on today as thoughts filled your head as you attempted to try and block everyone’s uninvited thoughts that were trying to make their way into your head. You tried to think, but at the same time you tried not to because every thought you had brought you back to what happened to you last night, when the person you thought was your friend had assaulted you and would have done worse if not for Kirishima.

But you didn’t want to think about him either, he made you feel so guilty and pathetic that you tried to block him out of your mind to. You just wanted to forget, you didn’t want to think about how Mageru betrayed you, violated you and wanted to take advantage of you in worse ways possible because you were so drunk because of him. So you resorted to what you always did, as soon as it was lunch you grabbed some of the most unhealthy things possible because food often made you forget about things, especially since you didn’t have any breakfast this morning.

“Chocolate Milk, fried noodles, bag of cookies, chips, small water bottle, milk and a bowl of soup just to try and eat something healthy-ish.” You muttered to yourself as you carried your tray over to where Hiromi and the rest of her bitches were at. Once you sat down you instantly felt all their eyes staring right at you, but you didn’t dare look up at them.

'Wow, someone’s looking to gain more weight.’

'She’s really gonna eat all that huh? Fatso.’

'Eww… why do that to yourself?’

Why did you put yourself through this? You don’t know why, but you refused to let their thoughts get to you as they remained silent until Hiromi spoke up. “(L/N), what in the world is that?” She asked you in a somewhat horrified voice. 

“Um, I didn’t eat breakfast this morning. I kinda have to eat?” You tried to sound matter-of-factly but Hiromi was relentless. “Well maybe it’s a GOOD thing you didn’t have breakfast. The rest of us haven’t had breakfast since we were 10 years old. And look at us, then look at you…” She said condescendingly with a look of disgust as you clenched your fists. 

You weren’t going to put up with this, shaking your head you picked your tray to go and leave but you didn’t see someone coming over to you as the two of you bumped right into each other, causing your tray and all your food to spill all over you.

Irritated and shocked, you immediately glared up at the offender. “You asshole!”

“Sorry! Sorry it was an accident!” But your eyes took a softer look once you saw that it was Kirishima who had bumped into you, “I’m really sorry (Y/N).” He looked guilty as he stared down at your uniform that was stained with chocolate milk, noodles and soup, which had gotten into your socks and shoes which felt disgusting. You were still irked about it, but you felt bad for yelling at him now.

“Wait. You guys know each other? A General Studies student and a Hero Course student? Are you hiding something from us (Y/N)?” Hiromi asked you and Kirishima, and the two of you both quickly exclaimed 'No’ in unison. 

“I just know his name…” You said, not really lying since you and Kirishima didn’t really know each other that well at all, other than each other’s names. “Y-Yeah that’s true…” He said in defeat, not wanting to embarrass you any further, but then you looked at him for an explanation.

“What are you doing here?” You asked somewhat curtly, and you were met with a phone. “You forgot your phone under my pillow and I knew you would need it.” He sheepishly said, trying to smile to lessen your bad mood but it wasn’t working. Although you did accept it when he gave it to you and you quietly thanked him as he kept his smile on, while you were trying not to blush. “What was YOUR phone doing under HIS pillow?” Hiromi asked again, her hands on her hips as the rest of the girls gave you questioning and judgy looks.

You froze a little bit, and as the girls stared at you, “N-Nothing…” Was all you could mutter out, but Hiromi didn’t believe you, “Yeah right. I smell a dirty little liar.” She smirked a little bit as the girls started to snicker, and their thoughts became rampant with accusations that you could hear loud and clear.

'Ew. She probably fucked him and is trying to keep it a secret.’

'Probably to score points with the Hero Course students.’

'I bet she thinks she’s better than us.’

'But why would this smoking hot guy want to sleep with her fatass?’

'She’s such a loser.’

'SO Pathetic.’

'What a slut.’

Closing your eyes at how the thoughts got louder, you cringed, shaking your head as your mind told you to just walk away, right now. So without looking at anyone, you turned around and walked out of the cafeteria as quickly as you could, ignoring the way Kirishima tried calling out to you and the high-pitched laughs coming from Hiromi and the girls.

First you desperately needed to get out of these clothes so you ran to your gym locker to put your PE uniform on, you weren’t going to walk around wearing a dirty uniform covered in food. Once you had that on, you left the locker room and headed outside to try and clear your head despite the fact that you were still hungover. Nothing was going right today at all, this morning was terrible and now the afternoon was terrible, how much worse could it get? You wondered as you stood outside the school, gasping when you heard loud thunder crackling and looked above to see grey clouds with a small white streak that indicated lightning as the first drops came down and dripped down your face.

There were other students outside and they noticed that the weather had taken a turn for the worse. Normally you didn’t mind the rain, but as you looked up a sudden downpour washed over you and drenched your new clothes and you gasped, having to retreat into the building quick as the rest of the students outside followed shortly inside, but someone was rude enough to push you out of the way and made you fall to the ground with a loud 'OH!’ of pain.

You heard some laughter as you picked yourself up, shivering from how cold and wet you had gotten thanks to the rain and got out of the crowd. Apparently rumor had spread about how you left the Height’s Alliance building and now you were hearing all sorts of gossipy thoughts from every student that passed you. You tried hard to ignore them, but they were just louder and louder.

It was so overwhelming, all the loud voices that were ringing and screaming in your sore ears as you moved away from everyone, keeping your distance as you felt your stomach churn from a bundle of nerves you didn’t know had settled inside you. You couldn’t stop shivering from the cold wetness that drenched your body, at least you thought it was the cold. You swallowed hard, gasping shakily as dread crawled inside your body, grabbing you by the throat and clutching your chest, making it hard for you to catch your breath as you started sweating from the strain and your eyes burned with tears because of how this feeling was strangling you. 

They were so loud, it was driving you insane and you could no longer hear yourself think. It made you feel so sick you thought you were going to throw up. Yet you didn’t, but you couldn’t help but lower yourself to the floor of the hallway, shutting your tearful eyes so you wouldn’t have to look at anybody anymore. Desperately, you threw your hands to your ears to try and block everything and everybody as you quivered and softly cried where you sat while everyone’s disgusting and false thoughts kept shrieking loudly like banshee’s in your brain. 

You were so shaken up that you almost didn’t hear a familiar voice, “Hey! Hey! Get out of the way! Hey (Y/N)!” You noticed that was Kirishima’s voice but you didn’t dare open your eyes for fear that it was just your mind playing tricks on you. Kirishima heard the rumors and he was worried about you ever since you left his dorm and the cafeteria, and as soon as he saw you like that, he quickly made his way over to you, even pushing some people who were laughing at you. As soon as he got to you, he quickly crouched down to your level. “(Y/N) are you all right…?” There was that soft voice again, you remembered it from last night.

Because he was the only good thing that was happening to you right now, you found yourself able to trust enough to open your glossy (E/C) eyes, looking up at him sadly. His gentle red hues looking at you with worry. “Are you okay?” Kirishima asked you, even though he was sure you weren’t, he wanted to at least try and make you feel okay.

'I can’t believe these guys… (Y/N) doesn’t deserve this…’

Your bottom lip quivered, remorse filling your heart because this boy was so nice to you even though you did nothing to return the favor and yet despite the horrible day you were having, he somehow showed up every time to make it just a little bit better by smiling at you. Not a single ulterior motive in his head. Before you knew it, you suddenly lunged yourself into him and threw your arms around the boy, making him nearly shout in shock from such a sudden move, but he didn’t and wouldn’t pull you away as you clutched at his shirt, squeezing your eyes and letting your tears fall. It took you a while to properly talk, but you took a large inhale before you found enough composure to say something. “I’m sorry… I-I’m so sorry Kirishima…” You apologized, hugging him a little tighter as he tried to not tear up at how miserable you sounded.

“Sorry? Why are you sorry…? You didn’t do anything wrong… you’ve got nothing to apologize for.

"Y-You… you gave me your bed… h-helped me when I got drunk like a moron… and took care of those assholes just to protect me… t-then you brought me back my phone… you didn’t have to a-any of that… but you did anyway… a-and, and I never once said 'thank you’… not like I should have… so… thank you… thank you so, SO much for all of that… God I can’t even thank you enough… that’s so much more than anyone has ever done for m-me…” More tears streamed down your face as your breathing started to hitch, making you hiccup as Kirishima then brought his arms around you, returning your hug and stroking your back gently to try and calm you down.

“Shhh, hey, hey now… it’s okay… it’s going to be okay… you’re going to be okay (Y/N)…” You felt so safe, safer than you’ve ever been because of how gentle he was being. “I know we don’t know each other, but I was happy to help out as much as I could…” Kirishima said with a little smile, and he meant every word because you didn’t hear a single deceptive thought from him. 

As he hugged you, you found oxygen greeting your lungs again as your heartbeat slowed down and you felt as if you could just melt in his warm embrace. You loved it, you loved how kind he was to you and how he made you forget about everything that just happened. He made you forget about Mageru, about Hiromi and about all the rumors people were making about you and him, the horrors you had to suffer didn’t leave you, but at least Kirishima was here to say that you were going to be okay. He was so warm and comforting that you wanted him to stay with you just a little while longer even though you knew realistically that it couldn’t happen because of your classes.

It took a while for you to completely calm down, but Kirishima was so patient with you and didn’t let you go because you were still clutching at him and basking in the comfort of his warm body. “Thanks for this…” You mumbled in the crook of his neck, making him blush a little bit. “You’re welcome… anytime okay?” He asked you, not caring that he didn’t know you as well as he did others, he always wanted to help people who needed it. And after last night and today, he wanted to make sure you were okay because he was truly starting to care for you almost like a friend even if he knew you and him were just acquaintances at best.

“I want to know you.” You suddenly said once you finally calmed down, and Kirishima perked up a bit and you both finally pulled away for a bit. “Oh really? Ya do?” He asked, almost excitedly as you started to blush and you tried not to look too eager but Kirishima’s smile looked so adorable it was impossible for you to not smile. “Y-Yeah… I mean… you already saw my bra and let me sleep in your bed…”

Kirishima’s eyes widened and now he was the one blushing when he recalled seeing you change your clothes in front of him earlier that morning, and you couldn’t help but smirk a little bit. “And you actually helped me when no one else did… I think that earns you something… and I honestly hate every single person in my class… ever since Shinsou joined the Hero Course in Class 1-B I don’t really have any friends that I actually like so… yeah… I wanna get to know you…” You said more seriously as your face grew warmer. You wanted to say that you were with him all the way, but it felt too soon for you to say that so you just offered him your friendship. And yet secretly, you hoped that it would turn into something more overtime because there was no way you were letting this one go.

Kirishima’s eyes remained slightly wide as he listened to you talk, but his smile grew when you more or less said that you wanted to be friends, and how could he turn down that offer? “Oh sure! Heck yeah I wanna get to know you too! I’ll be your friend!” He cheerfully exclaimed as you chuckled a little bit. 

“Since we’re officially meeting now that I’m not drunk… my name is (Y/N) (L/N).” This time you informally introduced yourself so he knew your whole name and brought your hand out for him which he gladly took to firmly shake. “And I’m Eijirou Kirishima!” He shared his full name with you as you shyly smiled, so his first name was Eijirou. What a pretty name, you thought.

“Uh… you mind taking me to my class? I’ll show you the way… sorry… I really can’t bring myself to go back by myself…” You asked him in a somewhat embarrassed voice as he happily nodded and smiled, “No I don’t mind at all! I’m always happy to help, lead the way!” He let you lead the way as you walked to your respective classes together, and you decided to actually talk to him.

“So you see… sometimes just coming to school is overwhelming… I get nervous around so many people… and it doesn’t help that my quirk lets me read people’s minds.” You admitted, deciding to let him know that as his eyes widened again and that knowledge allowed him to puzzle the pieces together, so that’s why you were covering your ears. The thoughts must have been too loud for you, but then his eyes grew more wide when he realized that you could probably hear what he was thinking right now.

“You can hear what people are thinking…?” He asked you, and you tried your hardest not to snicker as you nodded. “That’s right… I didn’t think you were a pervert by the way. At first I didn’t believe you… but I knew you didn’t take advantage of me last night… you don’t have a single bad thought in that sweet head of yours.” Your smirk grew as Kirishima’s face began to redden, but he still grinned at you bashfully.

“No way! I mean yeah no I’m not a pervert but no way… I would never take advantage of a drunk person ever! That’s beyond unmanly! Anyone who does anything like that… doesn’t deserve to be called a man or a person at all!” He stated, sounding a little angry at that last part because he was thinking about those assholes that were trying to do exactly that to you last night. Although you started to frown a little bit just remembering it, Kirishima’s concerned look made you smile again. This guy was just too sincere, a total sweetheart all the way.

“Well… you’re super manly for helping me get somewhere safe when I was drunk, and letting me have your bed… and for being nice to someone when they’re all by themselves and feeling miserable… there’s nothing manlier than that…” You said rather softly, smiling warmly at the redhead who was grinning at you sweetly and looking almost coy. “Aww thanks…!” But what you said also made him really happy, since he always aspired to be as manly as possible, and hearing you say that just gave him that validation.

You almost wanted to hold his hand, and this time you wouldn’t care what Hiromi and the others would think of you. Hiromi. That gave you an idea. “Follow me Kirishima…” You said to your new friend, who looked confused but he shrugged and respectfully obeyed as you started running towards the cafeteria that had less people than it did earlier, but you quickly made a fast order for two cups of chocolate milk and went back to Kirishima. “Chocolate milk?” He asked with more confusion evident in his tone as you smiled and nodded. “Uh-huh.” He then watched you make your way over back to that girl who was so mean to you.

Hiromi was talking to the girls about how disappointing 'some people’ are because of their eating habits and for being 'slutty’ by sleeping with students from the hero course, but she almost widened her eyes once she saw you standing right in front of her. “Oh well if it isn’t the Hero Course Ho. Well at least you came back to the right people.” She crossed her arms, not too happy to see you even though you were smiling, something you hadn’t done in a very long time. 

“First of all Hiromi. You see that boy with the sharky smile?” You pointed to a surprised looking Kirishima who nervously grinned and waved, showing off that sharky smile you had just mentioned. “He actually helped me, something none of you fucks ever did. I like him more than I like any of you, and guess what? I’m gonna be HIS friend from now on, and I’m not hanging out with any of you anymore, I’m not giving you girls anymore hot gossip, no more secrets, no more answers to homework and tests. Nothing.” You said to them, your smile becoming more of a grin as Hiromi’s eyes widened a little bit at how you more or less broke off the 'friendship’ that you had, but she scoffed and tried to look cool, even when the other girls were going 'no!’ because they relied on your mind-reading quirk to let you help them cheat on homework and share gossip to use as blackmail against other students.

“Whatever. You’re not good enough to be part of our crew anyway. You’re just some fatso who drinks chocolate milk and screws with dopey, spiky-haired douchebags from the Hero course. What kind of girl needs a man to help her?” She put her hands on her hips, trying to talk you down like she always did, but today it wasn’t working. Although you didn’t care for how she insulted Kirishima. At all.

“I might not have the strongest quirk. But NEVER talk shit about Kirishima.” You said to her lowly, yet calmly as you held the two cups of chocolate milk in your hands and then spilled both cups all over Hiromi and the rest of the girls, making them shoot up and squeal highly with horror upon being soaked with the sticky, sugary milk, ruining their hair and staining their uniforms which caught quite a few of the remaining students’ attention. 

You turned to see a wide-eyed Kirishima with his mouth agape as you started to laugh when Hiromi screamed. “MY HAIR!! YOU BITCH! YOU FUCKING BIIIIITCH!!” She started sobbing dramatically as she ran off, still shrieking and crying as a few other students kept on laughing and the other wet girls ran off in different directions, while some followed Hiromi.

Satisfied with what you did, you let out a cheerful laugh as you carelessly tossed the empty cups to the floor and actually skipped back to Kirishima, who was trying to not snicker at what he just saw. “Wow! That was… that was actually pretty awesome! You stood up to a jerk who tried to tear you down, now that’s just… so manly!” He exclaimed and seemed almost moved by your act of bravery, looking at you somewhat admiringly as you blushed and smiled shyly.

'This girl is amazing! I’m so glad that we’re friends now! I sure hope the rest of my class will like her…’

So pure. You thought, even though you kinda had to apologize to the rest of the Hero Course for being so rude this morning. “I kinda have to apologize to them first…” You chuckled a bit and he perked up, feeling kinda nervous since you implied that you knew what he was thinking. “Now that I did what I came here for… let’s go back to doing what we were supposed to do…” He got what that meant, and you both left the cafeteria to go and find your classes.

However, you had asked to see his class first so you could apologize to 1-A for your behavior this morning, and you smiled and waved when you came into the room. “Hey.” You greeted them pretty casually as many of them perked up, having recognized you from this morning but they weren’t sure how to react to your new attitude.

'Ah! It’s her!’

'But she’s smiling?’

'So different from this morning…’

“So yeah… some things were said… and I regret it. I was a bitch… there I said it, but I really am sorry for how mean I was. I don’t want to be enemies with anyone here, unless you wanna be my enemy that is.” You apologized, and nearly all of them (except for Bakugou) accepted. “It’s no problem! We apologize if we might have made you uncomfortable this morning with our staring.” Ingenium’s brother, Iida apologized and bowed to you as you snickered a bit, appreciating his politeness as you shrugged.

“It’s okay. I’ve gotten worse stares.” You held no grudge this time, since it was true, those weren’t the worst stares you’ve gotten from people. “The truth is my friends suck… and you guys seem WAY cooler… Shinsou’s said some mostly good things about you guys…” You added, as a few of them started to smile and their thoughts were some of the most pleasant you had heard all day. Except for that little grape-haired boy…

“So… does this mean you’re gonna hang out around us more like Shinsou?” The electric blonde you remembered from this morning, Kaminari asked you somewhat hopefully, obviously thinking that you had a cute face since you could hear him thinking exactly that and you couldn’t help but smirk and go over to him. “Why yes it does you naughty boy!” You playfully and softly patted his butt as he jumped a bit and blushed quite madly, his eyes wide with shock (pun intended) as Jirou and Sero started snickering at how flustered he was.

“Kirishima’s you guys’ friend… any friend of his, is a friend of mine.” You went back over to Kirishima, who was smiling widely at you, at least until one of his friends glared at you. “Well I’m sure as hell not going to be your friend you damn drunk!” Bakugou shouted at you, obviously not interested in your offer of friendship despite the fact that the rest of his classmates, especially Kirishima were accepting of it. However, you couldn’t help but smile at the angry blonde.

And you giggled a little bit, which just made him even madder, which Kirishima could see. “Aww c'mon Bakugou… (Y/N)’s not bad at all once you get to know her.” He tried to reassure his friend, but Bakugou wasn’t having it as he scoffed and kept his angry gaze on you as you smiled at Kirishima. “And you’re gonna get to know me all right.” You winked at Bakugou before you turned to face Kirishima, cupping his face before you suddenly kissed him gently on the lips as the redhead made a surprised sound, his face turning almost as red as his hair when he felt how soft your lips felt on his as he closed his eyes and slowly kissed you back and gently put his hands on your shoulders.

An array of shocked gasps and exclamations were heard throughout the entire class, many of the students, especially Midoriya, Iida, Uraraka, Yaoyorozu, Jirou, Aoyama, Ojiro and Sero who were wide-eyed and blushing at such a sight.

“P-Public Displays of Affection are prohibited in a school setting!” Iida exclaimed, very flustered as he waved his arm dramatically, but neither you or Kirishima paid him any mind. As the rest of his classmates were forced to witness, some were quite flustered and blushing, while some of the others only looked slightly less shocked, such as Tsuyu, Todoroki, Tokoyami, Shoji, Satou and Koda who had looked away as they blushed.

“AWWWWW!” Mina however, started to fawn all over the kiss as she saw that as a seal of a new relationship. “How romantic!” And Hagakure seconded the emotion as she and her pink friend cheered. “Ha! Way to go Kirishima!” Despite how you teased him, Kaminari was extremely happy for his friend. “Damn you Kirishima! It’s not fair! It’s not fair!!” Mineta cried with his fists clenched at how 'lucky’ his classmate was for having scored with a pretty girl.

“G-Get a room you idiots!” Bakugou actually stuttered a bit, his cheeks a slight red hue as he averted his eyes in disgust upon seeing the person he could call his best friend kiss a girl he didn’t really like at all.

But you cheerfully ignored him, even if you did eventually pull away from the wide-eyed, blushing Kirishima, your own cheeks a bright rosey pink. “I have to go… but do you want to hang out maybe after school is over?” You asked, a little shyly but excitedly as the redhead stuttered, obviously still rather surprised from how you kissed him but he snapped out of it once he registered your question.

“Oh yeah! Yeah totally! I’m down with that (Y/N)…” He finally answered, still looking flustered but excited as you giggled and reluctantly pulled away to head out the door. “I’ll definitely see you around.” You smiled at him, repeating what he had told you earlier this morning before you waved to him, and he happily waved back to you.

“And... thanks again Kirishima… thanks for today…” You said one more time, and he just smiled that smile that you had fallen for.

“You’re always welcome (Y/N).”

You were definitely with him.

[mytreefiddy]

It’s SO hard... .

This old planet has made another revolution and another candle is on the birthday cake for me. 

I get home from my birthday trip and make the rounds with my friends and to catch up on their 4th of July weekend stories. A few post celebratory drinks later I end up at Mike’s house.

Now Mike was the first person to welcome me to the neighborhood and I was as much as a part of his family as he was mine.  His wife Kelly was as sweet as they come and quite easy on the eyes along with their two kids.  Their daughter, Taylor was a tomboy and a bit of a trouble-maker if I ever saw one and I had watched her grow up over the years into a bright young women.  She just finished her first year of college and seemed to be setting the world on fire.  That being said...there was a change I noticed in her.  She seemed to be acting a little younger that normal.

Let me set the stage, we were very close and I was the first person she called when she got drunk for the first time so she would have a safe ride home.  I was the one she talked to about the tough stuff and even the good stuff.  Looking back I would say we had a very close bond and we would always hug and I would give her a kiss on the cheek as any good friend would do.  She would sit in my lap or on my knee and really no big deal.

College has always been a time for change and exploration and when she came back and I noticed she was acting a little different, I just thought it was part of the experience.  She seemed a bit more clingy to me, but I thought that was here being grateful for a good friendship.  She was still a bit of a trouble-maker...no..not robbing a bank or stealing the car, but just a bit snarky and would sneak a bit or two of your dessert.  This evening I was eating a cookie and she just leaned over and bit off the other end and laughed.  She has such a sweet devilish laugh.  I gave her the look and she sheepishly looked away...but before she did...she bit her lip...did she really do that???  No, I am sure she was just getting a crumb or something off her lips.  As usual I goosed her sides as payback and the evening continued.

I had the next day off, so I wasn’t worried about a few more drinks and we continued tell stories of our college days (tried to keep them pretty clean) and Taylor shared the usual trials and tribulations of being a Freshman.  Throughout the night I noticed that Taylor was staring at me even when I wasn’t sharing my college adventures.  She was also kind of snuggled up against me and her little dress kept riding up and the top was not staying put.  Let be honest, this wasn’t the first time I saw a flash of panties or a little skin...that just happens when you are around people that much.  You file it away as a Whoa! moment and try to look away faster next time. 

Taylor still had some baby fat, she wasn’t chubby, but had a nice little shake when she walked and when she flossed, everything seemed to move just right.  And yes, I looked away when it became a little to weird.  This night I probably saw more than I should have, but I was a bit drunk so my look-away reaction was just slower....was it?  She also was calling me her other daddy...that was new.  She said I always looked out for her (which I did), but was a little weird being call daddy. 

The night went on and my vision was a little bit fussy and I noticed my hand was on something soft and skin...and...why is my hand on Taylor’s bottom under her skirt?  Taylor was just talking away to her parents and from this angle no one could see.  I tried to move my hand away, but she kept shifting her body to keep it in place.  What the hell??   I quickly excused myself to go to the bathroom.  Did I do that, did SHE do that????  I need to get out of here before something happens.  It was a very nice ass though and those cute panties that she use to wear was now a thong...okay..stop...Okay..thinking about something else.

I told Mike and Kelly that I was going to go back home and thanks for the great evening and drinks.  They said I should stay and Taylor agreed.?.?  I said I was just going to walk home and it would just be easier so I wasn’t in the way in the morning.  I gave them both hugs and a kiss on Kelly’s cheek...a little too close to the lips...man her body felt great against mine...okay...Yes you are now drunk and not thinking straight...go home.  I gave Taylor a hug and kiss on the cheek...but this time she turned and it was more on the lips.  I shook it off and told her goodnight and she said the same...but really softly after she added daddy.  I was out the door!

Just as I was about to close the door, I heard Taylor say, “Wait a minute, I will drive you home...I have to go to the store to pick up a few things.”  I tried to pretend I didn’t hear anything...but she ran out grabbed my hand and said hold on.  She ran back inside and grabbed her glasses, not the glasses...I love her glasses.  I get in her car and kind of pretend to be resting and she is driving me home and just talking away.  I told her thank you and that she should get to the store before it gets too late and to text me when she is home so I know she is safe.  She tells me that the reason she is going to go to the store is for me...I say why.  She tells me she is going to make me a belated birthday cake.  I tell her there is no reason to and to save her money.  Taylor tells me that she is going to do it so just shut up!  I goose her again and joking tell her you don’t talk to you daddy that way.  She sits up tall and says, “Yes Sir!”.  I tell her okay silly I need to get to bed and thanks again.  She then asks if I have any cake mix...I tell her no, I am a chef and I just make it from scratch.  She asks for the recipe and I tell her I will text it to her tomorrow and she says, I need to get the ingredients tonight.  I cave and tell her she can borrow one of my books and go from there. 

We get inside and I stumble a bit in the door and Taylor laughs.  “You okay daddy”, she says.  I say funny and start looking for the book.  After a moment or two I find it, but Taylor is no where to be found.  I call out for her and she is in the kitchen.  “Can I borrow some coconut oil”, she says, I say sure and send her on her way.

I go to the bathroom and do the whole movie sceen with my hands on the sink looking in the mirror talking to myself.  That was close..what was close??  Seemed like something was going to happen...what do you mean?  You are imagining things and you are just drunk and horny...get your shit together.  Note to self, need a girlfriend fast...lol. 

I leave the bathroom and I hear, “OoOOo, Daddy’s been working out.”  Taylor what are you doing?  I though you left...she said I did, but I know where you extra key is (Great!  Now I need to hide that somewhere else).  “What are you doing on my bed?”, I say.  “It is more comfortable than mine.”, Taylor responds.  Okay, you need to get going...this is weird.  “You were the one with their hand on my little ass.”, she responds.  Well I didn’t put it there.  “I know.” she says, but that what made it so fun.  Not thinking, I say, “You are so bad!”.  “Only for you Daddy!”, she responds.  Okay, you really need to go.  “Daddy, you will have to make me.” she says as she bites her lip.  Okay, I go over to the bed and pick her up and take her to the door.  “You forgot my keys...they are by the bed”, she says.  I go back and get them and then she forgot something else over and over again.  I finally set her down and sit on the bed.  I am too tired for these games.  I need to get to sleep.  She says, “Go ahead, I am not stopping you.”  I crawl under the covers and roll over. 

I must have fallen asleep and the next thing I feel is someone sitting on me.  I look up and Taylor is on top of me with her little dress still on.  The straps are slowly falling down her arms and the only thing that keeps the top on is the very edge of the lace trim draped across her hard little nipples.  “Do you like them”, she says?  She gives a little shake and her top falls off.  Her breasts are perfect, perky, and full...she leans in and lets her nipples slowly glaze over my face.  She smiles that devilish grin at me and runs her hands slowly down my chest.  I grab them before she gets too low to stop her and she leans over and puts her breast in my face.  I move my hands to gently push her away and her hand reaches down and slides her hand over me.  She then pulls me up closer to her as she is slowly starting to slide up and down and I hear a slow...almost purr..and she says, “Yes, daddy.” ever so softly. 

“Taylor, come on”, I say.  We can’t do this... .  “It’s okay, you are not my really daddy...”, she moans.  “Your parents are my best friends...”, I say.  Before I can say another word, she locks lips with me.  I so don’t want to do this as I tense up.  Her mouth is so soft and feels so good, I grab her by the back of her ponytail with one hand and the other on her tight little ass and pull her closer to me.  She gasps with pleasure as she wants more.  I help guide her gliding up and down my shaft...that feels so good.  My cock finds its way out of my boxers and now I can feel every fold as she glides up and down.  Her panties are so wet and just fuels the desire. 

By now I have learned all of her hot spots as I found out she likes to have her nipples bitten and then sucked on hard and if my right hand “accidentally” lets a finger caress her little back-side she goes wild as she rides me, pressing so hard.  Pretty soon she had pulled her panties aside and her kitty lips are around my shaft sliding up and down.  With every movement my head is getting closer to going inside her at one point I gasp as I though I was going all the way in and had to stop.  Oh! She feels so good I don’t want it to stop.  I look at her deep and tell her, “We can’t.”  She seems to relent a bit but we are pushing every limit.  I can feel my cock throbbing as she is leaning back and moaning.

All of a sudden she stops dead in her tracks and looks into my eyes.  “Daddy, I need you to Fuck me or make me cum!  I can’t take it any longer.” she moans.  I flip her around so she is on top of me.  For the first time I can really see her little blue thong, so wet that it is see through.  I pull her close to my face gentle teasing her with my tongue on every spot but the one she really wants.  I feel her lips wrap abound my shaft...I let out a slight moan...I want nothing more to slowly feed her every inch and not stop.  I tell her, “No, it is your turn sweetheart.”  “Thank you daddy.”, she says while she takes it deep a couple of times and slowly kisses the head.  I pull her panties off and start to get closer to what she wants.  Deeper and deeper I go as reach the base and slowly let my tongue split her lips and what starts as a soft moan goes to a loud plea of more.  Deeper and deeper I go as my tongue explores every nook not wanting to get her off to soon but wanting her to enjoy the ride.  I found every spot that drove her crazy and a few unexpected ones that make her screen louder.  My fingers joined in on the action taking care to give those special spots extra attention.  My lips were swollen, but sucking on her lips and clit gave her so much pleasure, I couldn’t stop.  I turned her over and wrapped my lips around her clit and two fingers were inside at putting pressure on the top in just the right spot.  Her body was shaking and her moans were louder as she exploded all over my face.  I could have stayed there for hours... . 

She looked at me and said, “Oh, you poor face daddy.”  As she leaned over and licked up every drop.  “Was I a good girl?”, she looked at me and asked as she laid her body against me.  There was so much more I wanted to do and needed to do, but I am glad we stopped before things got every more carried away.  “Yes, yes you were a perfect little girl!”, I told her and then kissed her.

Time seemed to stand still for a long time and then just as nothing happened, we said our goodbyes...although the kissing lingered and she got in her car and left. 

I went back and laid down and tried to think of the amazing night and push the guild aside.  As I was drifting off to sleep, I got a text.  It was Taylor and she said, I picked up the cake supplies and there was a picture if a grocery bag and then a tub of frosting and sprinkles out of the bag that Taylor was holding.  I told her thank you and that I wasn’t that big of a sprinkle fan...but she responded.  You will be!!!..... .

[popatochisssp]

Fur a Good Time, Call... 3/15

Series: Undertale, Horrortale Relationship(s): HT!Sans/Reader, HT!Papyrus & Reader Chapter Warnings: none

You work at an animal shelter. You love all your fuzzy buddies and can’t imagine a better job for yourself than looking after cats and dogs all day, even when the work is hard and often gross. What can you say? You’ve got a lot of love to give!

You’re just not quite sure yet how you feel about the new monster who’s been helping out these days, and this riddle wrapped up in an enigma is something you just can’t resist investigating…

AO3 Link

Crushed

Sometimes, you kept weird hours at night.

You had a bad habit of coming home from work and immediately passing out, only to wake up around ten or eleven at night and have some space to fill until you could get back to sleep again.

Occasionally you made do with the slim pickings of nighttime TV or made yourself some food that you probably shouldn’t be eating so late, but mostly you resorted to screwing around on the internet with your phone.

That was how you found out that Sans kept weird hours, too.

You had stumbled across one of those unfortunate neon sign burnouts—one ‘Elmhurst Emergency & Trauma Center’ that became the ‘ Im hur t Emergency & Trauma Center’— and immediately thought of somebody who would appreciate it.

Before you could reason with yourself that it was after midnight and you had literally never sent Sans a text before and this was a hell of an opener with no context, you’d sent off the photo.

A response came not ten minutes later.

PUNbelievable: lol thanks for that, Pap just yelled at me to keep it down.

You: Sorry, not sorry!

And that was the humble beginning of your textual friendship with Sans.

You texted back and forth about a lot of things. Most of it was silly stuff you found online (you’d been right, Sans did appreciate memes) but you were surprised by how many topics could arise from that kind of thing.

You: No way you have that many.

PUNbelievable: you doubt my hoarding ability? [IMG-1]

You: Holy shit, so that’s what 86 rocks looks like. Congrats?

PUNbelievable: and those are just the pretty ones. i got some more in shoeboxes and stuff.

You: You have shoes?!

PUNbelievable: hey hey hey what do you take me for, some kind of fancypants? no shoes, just the boxes.

You’d even started to go a little out of your usual way to find things Sans might get a kick out of. You started following a couple geology-themed blogs just so you’d occasionally find something nerdy to share.

You: [IMG-24]

PUNbelievable: whoa, perfect cleavage, thanks. yours?

You: Not mine. Perfect, though? Really? I just thought it was gneiss.

PUNbelievable: calcite, actually.

You: LOL!

Completely by accident, you’d also discovered his love of cat photos. He sent them to you often as reaction images, some he probably just found online but a lot you recognized as cats from the shelter.

He admitted to you that pretty much whenever he got a free moment at work, he was in the cat room, picking up or poking or otherwise gently harassing somebody.

PUNbelievable: most of them are just chill little dudes, they’re great. i love it when they get happy and start vibrating, that’s the best.

You: You don’t have to convince me, I love every one of those fuzzbutts, especially when they purr! I think I just might be more of a dog-person.

PUNbelievable: really? i thought you were a human-person.

You: Hilarious, spoken like a true cat-person. I should’ve put you as Good@Cats in my phone.

PUNbelievable: what am i now?

You: PUNbelievable.

PUNbelievable: what that’s great!

PUNbelievable: keep it!

PUNbelievable: it’s perfect!

A triple-text and the first time you’d ever seen him use exclamation points: how could you say no to that?

It didn’t take long before you caught yourself thinking of Sans as a friend—not just a work-friend, an actual friend—and you weren’t positive, but you were pretty sure he thought of you the same way.

For one thing, when you talked to him at the shelter, he actually talked back. It was a little thing, but it was so unlike the clipped and stiff replies he gave when other people tried to make conversation that it was a noticeable difference.

Sans’ silence had seemed so antisocial and mysterious back before you knew him. Now that you did, it seemed infinitely obvious that the man was just an awkward dork who wasn’t sure what to say and didn’t want to bug anybody so he split the difference by saying as little as possible.

He smiled a little wider when he saw you, though, and mostly came to you now when he’d finished a task and wasn’t sure what else needed doing. He was always available when you were about ready to go to lunch and happily gushed to you over how well his brother’s schooling was going, and he listened attentively when you talked about your own life, even when it couldn’t have been very interesting to hear about.

Sans had to be a friend: you couldn’t think of anybody else you’d rather send videos at three in the morning, and that was the truest measure of friendship you could think of.

Speaking of which…

You: [LINK: Sad Cat Diary]

PUNbelievable: oh big mood.

You snicker a little at the mental image of Sans, huge and spooky-looking, trying to sneak up on a tiny thumbtack in the wall.

You’re glad you went for it that day when you asked Sans to lunch. It was impulsive and a little nerve-wracking to put yourself out there like that, but it netted you a really good friend.

You couldn’t regret that, not even a little bit.

-

Buddy was with you again, which seemed superfluous to say at this point, but there he was.

His clicker training had gone incredibly well—the food-motivated little gremlin that he was—and you’d gotten him to pick up all the basic commands that people expected out of their dogs and didn’t want to have to teach them.

He knew sit, stay, drop it (though he was stubborn and sometimes pretended he didn’t), and even shake! He’d also pretty quickly picked up when and where he was supposed to do his business, and after all the socialization you’d been doing with him he didn’t flinch or shy away from being touched by people anymore.

With all that and his clean bill of health from the vet, Buddy was almost ready to go up for adoption.

There was just one small formality left on the list to check off, and it was how Buddy interacted with other animals. Since he spent so much time in the dog room, around other dogs, you already had a pretty good idea of how he was with his own species, so you’d gotten your boy leashed up, asked Sans to snag a couple cats for you, and met in the playroom.

Based on Buddy’s walk awhile back, you had a feeling you knew how this would go, but better to get it all done according to the shelter’s protocols.

Sans was standing there waiting for you when you and Buddy walked in. At your advice, he’d grabbed Snickers and Button, two of the more easygoing cats you currently had with a history of not batting the shit out of curious dog noses.

You had to cover a laugh at the sight of Sans, though. Button was fully latched onto Sans’ arm, all four limbs wrapped around it while she chewed at the cuff of his sleeve, and Snickers had perched herself up on his shoulder to paw at his face while he ineffectively tried to lean away.

“You good over there?” you asked, just to cover your bases.

“yep. as you can see, i’m a ladies man.”

You bent down, undoing Buddy’s leash and giving him a quick pat. “Would you be offended if I made the obvious ‘drowning in pussy’ joke?”

“yes, i would,” Sans said. “that’s just vulgar. low-brow. have some class, wouldja?”

You laughed, which had clearly been Sans’ intention. He grinned proudly even as he knelt and tried to shoo the cats off his body, a little easier to do now that there was something else for them to focus on.

Buddy, for his part, was reacting pretty much exactly how you’d expected. He was alert and very obviously curious…but also extremely unsure about these small bendy-looking dogs that were fearlessly trotting up to him.

“you think he’ll be alright?”

You shrugged. “I think so,” you decided, “more or less. I wouldn’t put him down as a great choice for homes with other pets, but if they’re friendly like the girls here, I don’t think he’d be in trouble.”

Buddy had mustered enough courage to give Snickers a good sniff…only to recoil a little as she sniffed him, something that was obviously uncalled for and totally unpredictable.

“that’s what this is for, yeah?” Sans asked, and you turned to face him. “you’re seein’ what kinda place he’d be a good fit for?”

“Yeah. I mean, that’s pretty much what we’ve been doing the whole time he’s been here. Adoption’s the goal: we don’t have as many rules and procedures as a rescue, but we still want everybody to end up somewhere good.”

Sans’ red eye moved from you to the animals. Button was trying to loop around Buddy’s feet, which Buddy was not sure he was totally cool with.

“so…what’s ‘somewhere good’ for buddy?”

The question made you consider it. “Well… he’d probably need somebody a little patient. He’s still nervous around new stuff and needs awhile to get used to it.”

“sure.”

“Ideally an only-pet situation,” you added. You gestured to where Snickers was playfully trying to catch Buddy’s tail while Buddy hastily tucked it and scrambled around to keep her in his line of sight. “Can you imagine him having to deal with that all day? Or worse, a territorial cat?”

“nah, he’s a lover, not a fighter.”

“Exactly! Big ol’ marshmallow.” You smiled fondly. “Buddy just needs a place where somebody can be his best friend.”

“so…you, right?”

Cue the mental record-scratch.

“Huh?”

Sans clearly didn’t think he’d said anything unusual. “everything you just described is you. you’re patient, no pets, you’re already his best pal. why can’t you take ‘im?”

“I…” You frowned. “I can’t.”

Sans didn’t say anything, but you felt his eye on you so you turned to watch Buddy again. He’d laid down to keep his underside protected, and the cats were rubbing up against him on either side.

It was adorable.

“I can’t,” you said again. “I…work way too much. I’m always here, y’know? I’d feel awful leaving…a dog,” you pointedly don’t say Buddy’s name, “alone in the house all day long. And then half the time when I get home, I just go straight to bed, so I wouldn’t even be able to play with him or give him the attention he should get.”

You chanced a look at Sans. His expression…wasn’t judgmental. Maybe a little…sad? But he wasn’t judging you.

You sighed. “It just wouldn’t be fair to him,” you say finally. “I’ve always believed you shouldn’t get a pet if you can’t take care of it. Buddy’s a good boy, he’ll go to a good home real fast. I wouldn’t worry about it.”

“……if you say so,” Sans replied eventually. “guess i just always wondered why ya didn’t have your own pet when ya take care of ‘em all day. i know i thought havin’ a pet was pretty cool.”

Was? Oh, no.

“Did you…did you lose a pet, Sans?”

You shouldn’t be so surprised. The monsters went through hell underground, it should follow that no one was exempt from it, not even pets… but the thought still hurt your heart.

“yeah,” Sans said, and you ached with sympathy. You reached out to put a comforting hand on his arm when he continued, “Pap and i used to have a pet rock.”

Your expression flattened. “What do you mean, ‘used to’?” you demanded. “You’ve got like a hundred pet rocks.”

“nah, those are just rocks, they’re not pets,” Sans insisted. “not like rocky was.”

“……His name was Rocky.” Sans nodded. “I am…ninety percent sure you’re fucking with me.”

Sans put a hand to his chest, like an affronted southern belle. “would i do that?”

“Yes.”

“i’m hurt,” Sans said. “really. cut deep. rocky was a very important part of our family, i mourn his loss every day.”

“Okay, so what happened to him?” you wondered, suspicion evident.

“ran away.”

“…………”

“Pap blamed me for it,” Sans continued, shaking his head. “he was probably right to. i never fed him his sprinkles on time. didn’t appreciate him the way i should’ve, he was my rock and i just wasn’t there for him…”

“I’m a hundred percent now,” you said. “You’re fucking with me.”

Sans laughed, loudly and unabashedly. It made you laugh a little too, even though you shoved him in the arm right after.

“You’re such a jerk!”

“seriously, though,” he said. “if you ever meet Papyrus, ask ‘im about rocky, he’ll tell ya’.”

“Oh, I’m sure,” you said, tone dripping with sarcasm. You went over to rescue Buddy from his wannabe feline friends and added, “You better hope I don’t meet Papyrus because I’m gonna remember this and ask him and you’re gonna be exposed as a total liar!”

It wasn’t until you’d gotten Buddy’s leash back on and body-blocked your poor dog friend a little from Button and Snickers that you realized your designated cat-wrangler hadn’t answered you.

“Sans?”

He had his phone out and a serious expression on his skull as he penned something in. You’d learned only a week back that he kept a lot of reminders in his phone. He said it had been a major lifesaver to have something with him that could remember important dates and times for him, even when he couldn’t.

“Did you forget something?” you ask him gently.

Sans took a second to reply. “nah, just…remembered something i wanna do later. don’t wanna forget about it.”

“Okay.” You didn’t dwell on it. “Can you get Heckle and Jeckle here for me? I think Buddy’s had enough friendship for today.”

“yeah, sure.”

Sans scooped up the cats for you with only minimal mewing as protest, and you gave Buddy a scratch at his neck.

“Good boy,” you reassured him, leading him back to his kennel.

You were a little distracted, trying to decide how his adoption description should go.

You’d post it on the shelter website before you left work today.

-

The next day had you feeling…a little annoyed.

A new employee started today, somebody else’s young relative if his last name and obvious resemblance to your coworker were any indication, and no one had ever made you hate nepotism so much in your life.

You tried to rein it in: he was young and it was literally his first day, probably his first ever job and you knew there was always a learning curve. You wanted to respect that!

But… you might feel a little more forgiving if it seemed like he even sorta cared about the shelter and what you all did here.

You couldn’t speak to anyone else’s experience with him, but every time so far you’d tried to show him where something was or what the procedure is for such-and-such, he was looking off into the middle distance and nodding his head when he thought you were looking for an answer.

His phone buzzed once while you were talking and he broke direct eye-contact with you to respond to it.

You knew right then that he was somebody only in it for the paycheck. You didn’t think there was anything wrong with that, a job was a job, but he could at least have some decorum and try to look like he wasn’t bored of being there right in front of the person training him!

It was even worse because today was a day Sans wasn’t working. You couldn’t even complain to him about the new guy, or ask him to cover all the stuff he probably wasn’t doing that you’d have to go do yourself later.

Needless to say, you were already in a not-so-great mood when he came up to you in the middle of litterbox emptying around mid-afternoon asking for your attention—by the wrong name.

You didn’t bother to correct him. “Yeah, I can take a minute. What’s up?”

“The front desk girl called back. She said a guy wants to see a dog?”

…helpful. “Did she say anything else?” you prompted. “We got a lot of dogs here.”

He squinted, seeming to think about it. “Uhhh… I think it was Buddy? Or something like that.”

You weren’t quite prepared for the way your stomach dropped when he said the name. To cover it you spoke quickly, “Okay, thank you, I’ll go handle that. Can you finish cleaning the litterboxes for me?”

He sighed deeply, muttering, “I guess,” but you were already shucking off your gloves and heading to the sink to wash your hands. You could comfort yourself later with the knowledge that this guy couldn’t possibly last long here with an attitude like that. For now…

Oh, god.

You knew this was coming. You’d written up a great description for the website, and Buddy sat for his picture like a professional model: one ear flopped and the other pointed up with his pretty blue eyes and his tongue lolling happily out of his mouth.

He was a good boy and a beautiful dog, you knew he’d get adopted quick.

You just…hadn’t thought it would be so soon.

It’s not like you hadn’t gotten attached to dogs before. It happened a lot, actually, and it hurt a little each time watching them walk out the shelter door, but it had always been a light sting, easily soothed by the knowledge that they were going to a good home with people who’d love them.

But you had a terrible feeling that Buddy was going to hurt a lot more.

“How come you’re different, you little stinker?” you asked him, opening up his kennel and stepping in.

Buddy seemed oblivious to your sudden distress. He all but hopped off his cot when he saw you and the leash in your hand, his tail wagging while he sniffed at your pant leg in greeting and oh stars, this was going to be the last time he ever did that.

You got down on your knees to put his leash on. “C’mon, you gotta be a good boy. We’re gonna go meet your new dad.”

Because really, there wasn’t a question of if. It was like you’d told Sans, there wasn’t really a screening process or applications needed to take home a pet from here.

If you liked a dog, filled out the single sheet of paperwork, and paid the fee, that was your dog—and who wouldn’t like a sweetheart like Buddy once they met him?

You took a deep breath and got back to your feet. “Alright,” you said, mostly to yourself. “Alright. Let’s go, Buddy.”

The walk over to the lobby seemed shorter than it had ever been. You had to force yourself not to stop right before the doorway for ‘just a minute,’ knowing damn well that it wouldn’t be just a minute.

When you got there, there was only one person waiting in the lobby…and the sight of him nearly made you drop the leash.

He was a skeleton.

If you’d thought Sans was a big guy, the sight of this man scrunched into the almost comically small waiting chairs had instantly disabused you of the notion. It was hard to get a bead on exactly how tall he must be, since he was seated so politely with folded hands, but you’d guess he might be actually double your height, if not taller. He at least wasn’t built as broadly as your friend, but his overall length of limb seemed to make up for it and if it weren’t for his obvious good manners the sheer size of him might’ve been enough to make you a little nervous.

Well…his manners, the cobalt-blue squares of his (really cute) braces, and his matching glasses frames that were actually taped to the sides of his skull.

He spotted you almost the moment you walked in and rose to greet you.

“Hello!” he said cheerfully, offering one massive, spindly hand for you to shake. “I’m Papyrus! It’s A Pleasure To Meet You.”

It was…interesting trying to figure out how to shake his hand in return with the obvious size difference, but he took pity on you and helped you make it work. You introduced yourself right back.

“Ah, Of Course,” he said when you told him your name, “Sans’ Human. He’s Told Me A Lot About You, All Good Things, Naturally!”

You laughed a little, feeling just a tiny bit nervous all of a sudden at the thought of Sans talking about you—and at being called ‘Sans’ human.’ “Likewise. Uh, congratulations on acing that test last week!”

Papyrus scoffed, but you couldn’t help but notice the sudden hint of denim-blue on his cheekbones. “Thank You, But Really, I Have No Idea Why Sans Would Brag About That To Anyone! Did He Tell You The Exam Was On The Human Skeletal System?”

“Pfft… No, he left that part out, I think.”

“I Didn’t Even Study, For Obvious Reasons,” he told you, gesturing broadly to himself. You suddenly noticed the vibrant rainbow tie-dye crop-top he was wearing, and the black jacket he had over it with intricately embroidered flowers stitched into the leather.

Sans had been so right: Papyrus was insanely cool.

“We’re Getting Off-Topic,” he declared, bending further from his already hunched position to look at the dog beside you. “This Must Be Buddy. Hello!”

Buddy’s nose went straight into the hand Papyrus reached out to him, sniffing with vigor as always.

“Ah, You Smell My Bone Cologne! You Must Be A Dog Of Excellent Taste, A Connoisseur Of Fine Smells!”

You couldn’t help your smile. “Buddy certainly is that,” you agreed. The cold dread that had pooled in your gut at the thought of Buddy being adopted today had curiously disappeared and it left you feeling lighter than air. “Why don’t we all head to the playroom for a bit? You can interact with him a little better in there than in the lobby.”

“Excellent Suggestion!” Papyrus said. “I Would Be Delighted!”

The skeleton followed you further into the shelter, ducking under door frames blatantly not built with his height in mind. You were glad that the playroom had a high ceiling so everyone would be comfortable there.

As soon as you were all through the door, you unclipped Buddy’s leash and wrapped it up around your hand. “Papyrus, you can go ahead and ask Buddy to bring you a ‘t-o-y,’ he knows what that word means and he’s good at fetch.”

“Oh, So Am I!”

“Really?”

“Yes, Unrivaled At Fetch In All Of Snowdin,” he said proudly before pausing and looking a tad hesitant. You noticed he had the same nervous gesture Sans had, of looking down and to the left, and you found it unspeakably endearing. “Well, I Was, Anyway, For A Time. I, Erm…Worked Quite Closely With The Canine Unit And My Fetch Time Was Always The Best Out Of All Of Them! My Training Regimen Hasn’t Been…As Rigorous As It Was Back Then, Though, So I Suppose I Can’t Say With Certainty That It’s The Same. I’ve Been Busy Lately, Even By My Own Standards!”

“I know the feeling,” you empathized. “Adding Buddy into the mix won’t be too much, will it?”

Papyrus laughed, a bright and booming ‘NYEH-HEH-HEH’ that totally disarmed you.

“I Don’t See How It Could Be,” Papyrus assured you. “Buddy,” the dog focused on him instantly, “Can You Bring Me A Toy?”

Buddy perked right up when he heard the word of fun-times and happily bounced off to pick his favorite, a spiky rubber hedgehog that had seen better days, but its squeaker still worked so it was The Golden Toy to many of the dogs here.

Papyrus seemed pleased to have the slimy thing dropped into his hand and he gave it a gentle lob across the room. Buddy went after it like a shot. Almost as if he knew his performance was being judged, he even jumped a little to snatch it right out of the air.

Papyrus gave a suitably impressed noise and patted Buddy on the head when he returned the hedgehog. “Well,” he said, giving the toy another toss, “He’s Smart And Fast And A Very Handsome Dog—He’s Already Met All My Standards!”

“I can’t say I’m surprised, I’m pretty fond of Buddy myself. I, uh, I have to admit, though, I am curious why…” You frowned, wondering if the thing you were about to ask was presumptive. “Did…Sans tell you? About Buddy?”

“Yes, Of Course!” Buddy brought the hedgehog back again and Papyrus put it to the side, abandoning the play in favor of scratching through Buddy’s black and white fur. “We Don’t Really Keep Secrets. I’ve Known About Buddy For Quite Awhile!”

“Oh. Right.” You cleared your throat. “Then, I guess I don’t have to give you the disclaimer about his one unfortunate biting incident? Which hasn’t been repeated!” you quickly added.

Papyrus didn’t seem concerned. “The Only Thing Unfortunate About That Incident Is That Sans Still Wears That Old Hoodie!” Buddy had rolled over onto his back and if his windmill of a tail was any indication, his new skeleton friend was very good at belly rubs. “It Speaks To Buddy’s Tenacity! I Admire A Dog Who’ll Protect Himself When He’s In Trouble!”

Not many people saw it that way—an aggressive dog was just an aggressive dog, even with extenuating circumstances. Papyrus’ perspective was…refreshing.

“Well… he’s not exactly a guard dog, if that’s what you’re looking for,” you cautioned. “Mostly, he runs away if he’s in trouble, so…”

“That’s Even Better! Unnecessary Conflict Is So…Unnecessary!” Papyrus grinned broadly at you. Even with his braces, it was a totally winning smile. “I Think Buddy Will Fit Right In At Our House!”

“That’s…that’s great!” you said and you sincerely meant it. “If you’re ready to take him home today, we can go back to the front and get everything settled.”

Papyrus agreed immediately.

On the way there, he seemed compelled to assure you that he was well-prepared for Buddy’s arrival. He’d read through as much dog-ownership literature as he could find online last night and purchased all the essentials as soon as the stores had opened this morning: kibble, a bed, a leash and collar set with bones on them—and how fashion-forward was it of dog-accessories to include bones in their designs? Papyrus was very impressed!

“…And Of Course, He’ll Get Plenty Of Exercise, I’ve Been Looking For A Jogging Buddy And He Already Has The Right Name For It!”

You laughed. “Papyrus, I can’t tell you how great that is to hear. I love knowing my dogs are going somewhere good for them. You know half the people who adopt don’t even fill out the form all the way?”

Papyrus looked at the piece of paper you handed to him. He flipped it over to see the blank backside and frowned. “What, Seriously???”

“Seriously. It's not technically required, mostly for record-keeping, so people just don't do it or leave a bunch of blanks. You wouldn’t believe how many of those have no addresses because people couldn’t be bothered to remember what street they lived on.”

“………” Papyrus started snickering. “Oh My God, How Embarrassing… Nyeh-Heh-Heh, I Really Shouldn’t Laugh,” he said, grabbing a pen and jotting down his information. “That Sounds Like Exactly The Kind of Thing Sans Would Do.”

“Does it really?”

“Sadly, Yes. If I’d Left This Up To Him, It Would All Be Blank Except For Maybe His Name. And Then He Wouldn’t Turn It In. And I’d Find It Three Weeks Later Crumpled Up In His Trash-Tornado.”

“That sounds…exactly right, actually.” Sorry, Sans, can’t defend you against completely true accusations!

The lobby was quiet for a few moments, filled only by the sound of Buddy’s panting and the scratching of the pen.

Then Papyrus spoke up again. “Actually… Is…. Feel Free Not To Answer, If It’s Something You Don’t Feel Comfortable Discussing, But… Sans.”

You waited for him to finish his thought, but he didn’t. “Yes?” you prompted.

“He’s Not… Is He Like That Here?” Papyrus asked you, looking concerned. “I Know He’s Not Technically ‘Employed,’ But… He Does Things Here, Right? He Doesn’t Just… I Don’t Know, Sit In The Break Room All Day And Look Busy When Someone Important Walks By?”

You blinked, startled by the thought. “No, he doesn’t do that. He’s a big help around here. Actually,” you added, sheepish and a little quiet in case your voice carried, “I was kind of upset he wasn’t in today, ‘cause I don’t think I’m gonna get as much done without him around to lend a hand.”

You may as well have told Papyrus it was his birthday and every other holiday combined into one.

“Really? Oh, That’s Great!” He pressed a hand to his chest and heaved out a relieved sigh. You weren’t quite sure how that worked with a skeleton, but there it was. “I’m So Glad He’s Being Productive. I Knew This Place Would Be Good For Him! He’s Even Made Two Wonderful Friends!”

Oh, that meant you and Buddy, didn’t it? You think you might be flushing a little, but try to play it cool.

You and Papyrus get the adoption fee and all the other logistical stuff taken care of and soon enough, “That’s it, Buddy’s all yours, free and clear!”

“Thank You So Much For Your Assistance! And Obviously, Call Me Anytime!”

You paused. “Call you?”

“Yes, Of Course! My Number Is On The Form.” Papyrus seemed to notice you were still confused. “Sans Mentioned You May Want To Come Visit Buddy From Time To Time. You Seem Almost As Busy As I Am, We’d Probably Need To Align Schedules At Some Point To Make It Work.”

Sans mentioned…?

You put a pin in your train of thought. Hesitantly, you got out your phone and pulled the piece of paper closer. “Are you sure that’s alright?” you asked, just to make sure. “I, uh… I can’t say I don’t want to see Buddy again sometime, but….”

“Nonsense, Any Friend Of Sans Is Welcome Over Whenever.” Papyrus gave another quick pat to Buddy’s head. “And Any Friend Of Buddy Is Doubly Welcome!”

Good enough for you! You put his number in your contacts, just under ‘Papyrus’ for now. “You know,” you said as you did so, “we could be friends, too. If you wanted.”

When you looked up from your phone, you found Papyrus staring at you like…well, like he didn’t know what to say.

“…Really?”

“Sure?” Offering to be friends with somebody shouldn’t have been able to put a look of such touched elation on their face, but there was Papyrus looking like you’d just offered him the moon in a few short words.

“Oh! Well, That’s! That’s Fantastic! I Accept!” He was blushing blue again even as he laughed that cute laugh of his. “A Friend, Wowie!” He seemed to remember Buddy at his feet. “Two Friends! What A Day! I’m Sorry To Leave So Suddenly, But I Think I Have Some Energy to Run Off Right Now, Do You Mind?”

“Not at all,” you promised. “Go bond with your new dog.”

“I Will, And Thank You Again! Come Along, Buddy!”

Buddy spared a glance at you, seeming to wonder why you weren’t coming with, but he wasn’t concerned enough to hesitate more than a second before trotting after Papyrus out the door.

Buddy didn’t need to worry about never seeing you again, after all. Neither did you, for that matter.

All thanks to a certain meddling skeleton.

A skeleton that you called the second you went off the clock for lunch.

“y’ello?” he answered after a couple rings, sounding a little like you’d just woken him up.

You didn’t waste time feeling guilty about it. “Hey, did you tell your brother to adopt Buddy?”

“heheh, what? no.”

“Really? Because he said—”

“look, i don’t tell Papyrus to do anything,” Sans said flatly. “…but maybe i did mention that the cool dog was up for adoption, the one who tried to eat my terrible jacket that Pap hates. and that my pal at the shelter might be a little, uh… sad if he went real far away and they couldn’t see ‘im anymore. if he decided to go pick buddy up after that, that’s just serendipity, y’know?”

You huffed out an incredulous breath. “I can’t believe you did that.”

“did what?”

“You adopted a dog for me!”

“he’s a good dog. Papyrus can tire ‘im out when he’s not at work or studying and i’m not at the shelter every day, so i got ‘im the rest of the time. that’s what you were worried about, right? buddy gettin’ left alone too much?”

“Well…yeah.”

“so, problem solved, right? plus you can have visitation an’ stuff. long as you pay child support.”

You snorted loudly. “Child support?”

“yeah, child support. he was your son first.”

“He’s not my— what even is ‘child support’ in this scenario?”

Sans sounded like he was thinking it over. “mmm…lunch for a month?”

“…you’re kidding.”

“you’re right, two months.”

“That’s not how haggling works!”

“drivin’ a hard bargain, huh? okay, a week.”

You finally broke down giggling. “Fine,” you laugh, “fine, a week.”

“oh, nice, i didn’t think that would actually work.”

What a goober.

“Oh my god. Okay, sorry to bug you on your day off, you can go back to bed now, I guess.”

“bold of you to assume i ever left it.”

“And Sans?”

“yeah?”

“Thanks.” It seemed weak. Not enough of a word to convey the warm gratitude you felt bubbling up in your chest when you thought about what he’d just done for you—him and his brother both.

It was weak, but it was all you could think to say.

“forget about it,” Sans said simply.

And that was that.

You got on with your day, going to lunch, coming back and dealing with your duties and that damn new guy, but the whole time, in the back of your mind, you were thinking, He adopted a dog for me. He sent Papyrus to adopt Buddy so I wouldn’t be sad.

You were starting to think that maybe you were in trouble here.

Your relationship with your ‘pretty good friend’ was starting to feel an awful lot like a crush.

-

Later that night, Sans texted you first.

PUNbelievable: hey, sounds like you made my bro real happy today. thanks, he deserves to have more good stuff in his life.

So do you, was your first thought, but something told you Sans might not see it your way.

You: Sure, he’s as cool as you said he was, but don’t think you’re off the hook about that Rocky thing because I forgot earlier. I’m gonna ask him next time and then you’re busted!

PUNbelievable: lol

You had almost mustered enough irritation to be playfully annoyed at him when he sent another message.

PUNbelievable: [IMG-13]

It was picture of Buddy curled up on a bare mattress in a dark room—Sans’ room—with a big bony hand settled on his withers mid-fur-ruffle.

PUNbelievable: somebody’s making himself right at home, guess life over here ain’t so ruff.

…Okay, yep. You were crushing.

Prev Chapter | Next Chapter

[summerseachild]

Summersea’s GoT Season 6 Tumblr Spoiled First Time Watch 2019: Part 1

So I was going to rename this a “hatewatch” now that I’ve gotten to a whole season I hadn’t seen before, but let’s be honest. If you’ve seen me reblogging things from later seasons, it was never going to be that. There are things that I knew I was going to enjoy VERY MUCH, and I wasn’t wrong. There were also things that, if I let them, would have had me frothing a the mouth in rage. 

But then I reminded myself that I’m vacationing in Castle Not Giving a Shit while I watch the back half of the show, and things were much better after that. I’ve mostly left my in the moment reaction except where I’d had too much wine to be coherent.

Season 6

Hot on the heels of season 5 i still have a third of a bottle of Chardonnay left let’s DO THIS

6x01

1. Lol it’s still in the credits so they continue to pretend like they care about Dorne????

2. Ghost howling 😢😢😢

3. So Davos went straight from staning one dour person to another... he has a type.

4. Some dude in the night’s watch re Melisandre: who’s she? Davos: oh just some lady Who spat a shadow out of her vag once LETS TRUST HER

5. Wow Olly aged a lot over the past five minutes since he killed Jon!

6. Edd please don’t die here. I don’t remember how you go but don’t let it be here

7. Boo hoo poor little psychopath lost his gf. No one cares, Ramsay. Myranda deserved what she got AND SO WILL YOU

8. My soul left my body like three times during that chase scene where Theon and Sansa are running from the Bolton men. POOR COLD BBS

9. That hug where they’re just CLINGING TO EACH OTHER THIS SHOULD NOT MAKE ME SHIP IT BUT HERE WE ARE

10. THEON SHOWING HIMSELF TO TRY TO KEEP HER SAFE I CANNOT HE KNOWS WHAT IT MEANS IF THEY CATCH HIM AND HE DOES IT ANYWAY SO SHE MIGHT HAVE A CHANCE 

11. IT’S BRIENNE OF MF-ING TARTH OMG YAY

12. Also go Theon killing that dude

13. UGH THE SWEARING FEALTY SCENE WITH SANSA AND BRIENNE AND ALL OF THEIR FACES AND SANSA LOOKING TO THEON BEFORE ACCEPTING AND POD REMINDING HER OF THE WORDS IT IS PERFECT 

14. Give me the AU where Theon lives and stays at Winterfell because he wants to be near her and they understand each other and Brienne is in her Queensgiard I AM NOT ASKING MUCH

15. Meanwhile in other trauma hi Cersei

16. UGH LOOK HOW SHE RUNS ACROSS THE COURTYARD TO SEE HER DAUGHTER

17. So... that scene with Jaime and Cersei where they talked about seeing Joanna’s dead body and she... Doesn’t blame him??? For Myrcella? Like I thought she would??? And she tells him about the prophecy??? And they hug??? Yeah that’s in contention for my fav Lannister twin scene ever? Top five at the very least. (And another member of the “Jaime writes his siblings’ dialogue” club.)

18. For all of his false kindness and gentleness the High Sparrow is just as bad as any of them, and When I’m not seething with anger I can appreciate how nuanced Jonathan Pryce’s performance is.

19. Wtf Ellaria and Tyene murdering Doran.

20. OMG TRYSTANE and I call Sand Snake Character Assassination here they are just SO BITCHY and without honor and the Dorneish are SO HONOR OBSESSED ugh why I hate it Also was that Myrcellas ship? Are there two bitchy Sand snakes just chilling in king’s landing now?? 

21. Tyrion and Varys among the people is kind of fascinating. Also what’s up with that Red Priest? Another who thinks the lord of light chose Dany?

22. Oh no the ships... Varys and Tyrion running TOWARD trouble says a lot about them.

23. Did the showrunners... forget Jorah would know the word Khalasar? Why would he say horde?

24. At least the Khals believe Dany is Drogo’s widow?

25. Ok so the waif is fascinating and her movements are just so... Succinct. A++ physical acting or whatever the word is.

26. Whoa that’s Melisandre without the necklace?? Cool story bro but why did she choose then to take it off? What does that tell us about her as a character or her powers? Just wanted to show some crone boobs? IDEK that was a weird ending.

6x02

1. The trailer reminds us that BRAN IS IN THIS SHOW

2. Remember this kid? He’s a Stark! He’s VERY IMPORTANT! He’s GONNA BE KING, but he wasn’t in all of season 5. He matters WE PROMISE.

3. The older generation of Starklings!!! I would be lying if I didn’t say seeing Lyanna and Brandon and Ned and Benejen And Nan and bb Hodor didn’t give me a LOT of feelings. (Also Bloodraven is the Worst Ghost of Christmas Past Ever.)

4. Cross fandom wish: I want to see Hodor, Groot, and Rocket have a conversation where everyone understands every word.

5. So... Meera and Summer have been hunting so that they all stay alive, right?? Otherwise WHAT ARE THEY EATING

6. Ok I take back what I said about them only having the Children once, but that was WEAK. “Help Bran, Meera. Because I said so and I’m a creepy magical person whose motivations are unclear”

7. YEAAAAAH WUN WUN SMASH THOSE TRAITORS. Good on you too Edd for taking charge.

8. Ugh every bar has one like that asshole talking about Cersei. And I don’t think he’s long for this world

9. I LOVE BEING RIGHT HI GREGOR

10. Why would Tommen keep Cersei away from Myrcella’s funeral. OH GODS HE WAS TRYING TO PROTECT HER.

11. Ugh Jaime is tired of keeping vigil over his dead family members GIVE HIM A BREAK

12. Also Jaime promising never to let Cersei be in a cell again while he’s there AAAAHHH YES 🦁 ❤️

13. There’s nothing more dangerous than a fanatic who fears nothing, Jaime. But him threatening the High Sparrow was made of sex.

14. SEVEN HELLS did Tommen just give Cersei the idea to blow up the sept

15. Dany’s council meeting in absentia is kind of neat. I was wondering how those crazy kids were doing. 

16. Lol I drink and I know things is ABOUT TYRION KNOWING ABOUT DRAGONS 🐉 I DID NOT KNOW THAT AND I LOVE IT

17. Tyrion being like “please DO NOT EAT THE ALLIES (me)” to Viserion and Rhaegal is amazing

18. Viserion is all ME TOO LET ME GO HERE’S THE CHAIN SMALL HUMAN when he shows Tyrion his neck.

19. That was a rough test Jaqen

20. Yes Ramsay please march North I dare you

21. Roose KNOWS what Ramsay is and tries to steer him out of it but I don’t think he truly understands how deep the crazy goes

22. HOLY SHIT RAMSAY JUST STABBED HIS DAD and everyone either is too scared of Ramsay to do anything about it or was in on it. LOOKING AT YOU KARSTARK ASSHOLE

23. Oh Walda you sweet trusting soul he is going to feed you and your baby to those dogs isn’t he. I DON’T like being right. Have I mentioned that?

24. Brienne recognizing Sansa’s choices were hard ❤️❤️

25. Ugh Theon talking about all the things he’s done and Sansa hugging him anyway aaaaah my soul

26. It’s hard to hear someone else say they forgive you you when you don’t think you deserve forgiveness, and he’s definitely not ready to hear it from Jon. (But he’s ready to hear it from Sansa because of what they’ve been through together? I like that explanation and I’m sticking to it.)

27. Oh right Pyke exists the show doesn’t remember that unless it’s convenient.

28. HOW DARE YOU REFERENCE THAT PINECONES LINE SHOW YOU HAVE NOT EARNED THAT

29. Ok at least Yara cares about her people and we get to see it.

30. OMG Euron? He’s the one who kills Balon?

31. ...and he’s kind of got delusions of Grandeur? “I am the drowned god” wtf sir.

32. Gotta admit Iron Islands burial customs are kinda neat

33. We get the Kingsmoot? I’m listening, show... you’re on notice but I’m listening.

34. Depressed Melisandre is depressed. Wait... has she never done the raising from the dead thing? SEVEN HELLS SHE HASN’T.

35. A pep talk from Davos might snap me out of my crisis of faith too.

36. Thoros can do this in the language of Westeros, but I guess if Valyrian works for you...

37. I love Tormund peacing out of the room with Mostly Dead Jon like “I have had enough of this south of the wall bullshit”

38. Did Melisandre reach the lord of lights answering machine and it took him a while to get back? “If you would like to leave a resurrection request for R’hllor, please press one...”

39. Ghost’s eyes open AND SO DO JON’S hey bro

6x03 this episode is called Oathbreaker ARE WE ABOUT TO GET TO SEE THE FLASHBACK TO JAIME KILLING AERYS PLZ TELL ME

1. He liiiives! Poor Jon... what did you see while you were gone I wonder?

2. Oh jeez it was nothing. At least he has the most comforting sensible person in this series to help him through.

3. I like that Jon gets to come downstairs and HUG TWO OF HIS FRIENDS and none of the nights watch or the wildlings bat an eye or seem to think less of him for it. LET MEN HUG. 

4. Oh jeez Sam’s taking Gilly and the baby to Horn Hill? Do we get to meet his mom? (No one cares about Randylll but I think we might get to meet him too?)

5. BB Sam is SO CUTE HE HAS HAIR NOW.

6. Wait is Gilly pregnant again?

7. That is the Tower of Joy and I AM NOT READY

8. HOLY SHIT HOWLAND REED KILLED ARTHUR DAYNE?

9. Sword of the morning indeed WHAT A BADASS (somewhere in my soul Jaime is waving an “Arthur Dayne Rocks” banner) there’s no way Ned could have won that fight without help and now Bran knows that??? I don’t really have anything interesting to say here I just love the idea of a kid getting to see the truth of a family story that’s radically different from what he thought he knew.

10. Past Ned HEARD BRAN? FASCINATING?

11. Oh right Dany is about to meet all of the other widows of the Khals this could be cool but knowing d and d it won’t be because it would involve treating WoC with nuance.

12. Not impressed so far.

13. So this girl Varys is meeting with is in league with the Sons of the Harpy? Good my memory is intact.

14. all this with Varys actually TRYING to take care of Meereen is fun...

15. Tyrion being like OMG I AM BORED PLZ TALK ABOUT SOMETHING to Grey Worm and Missandei is the most him thing ever. I feel you Bro. He’s a people person deep down and just wants to be friends so badly.

16. Qyburn with all of Varys’ little birds and making kids’ abusive parents disappear is PRECIOUS.

17. Don’t poke the Mountain, Jaime

18. LANNISTER MUSICAL CHAIRS PART 2 also Jaime is ON THE SMALL COUNCIL NOW??? Who gave book!Cersei three wishes??? Him actually being in her corner and working with her as a team must be like a wish come true...

19. “Grand Maester Pycelle would you sanction that starement?” 😂 Lena’s delivery of that line made me laugh so hard we had to rewind to hear the dialogue.

20. No no don’t leave the three of them together they’ll plan murder. Well, Cersei and Jaime will. Gregor will nod.

21. Tommen confronting the high sparrow fascinated me. He has some of the I WILL KILL YOU family traits on display here but it’s understandable given what his family has gone through at the high sparrows hand. I’d be threatening murder too if I were him.

22. What are you playing at mr high Sparrow? Because I don’t trust you farther than I can throw you, and I don’t even have a good arm.

23. The Hound was not on her list any more 😢 that whole scene with Arya recounting her life and learning to fight blind is NEAT.

24. Wait faceless men are immune to the poison in the water?? Cool.

25. Is that supposed to be Greatjon Umber’s son who refuses Jon? What an ass.

26. My wife adds, “THESE LOSERS are the people Sansa is supposed to be queen of?”

27. OH SHIT OSHA AND RICKON AND SHAGGYDOG HOW DID THAT EVEN HAPPEN? (Please let Sansa Find out who did that and who helped and give them what they deserve... there’s no way anyone took down that wolf alone.) I HATE THAT WE ARE NEVER GOING TO GET CLOSURE ON THAT PROBABLY.

28. Oh shit Jon has to hang the traitors that’s gonna be hard on him.

29. At least Alliser is consistent.

30. Jon did what he had to do... just like Ned in the first ep.

31. Wait WHAT did you just hang those men and then LEAVE? Isn’t leaving just as damaging to the order as killing the lord commander? That seemed overly quick and weird but ok????

32. Guess Jon was the Oathbreaker.

6x04

1. If anyone deserved an I JUST DIED crisis, it’s Jon. Also, the vows say, “it will not end until my death...” so technically...

2. Brienne got them up to the Wall QUICK. She is nothing if not efficient.

3. Sansa and Jon are like, “so... how cool are we going to play this? NOT COOL AT ALL LETS HUG” so sweet.

4. “Where will WE go?” Yes stay together Starklings because family is important certainly don’t scatter to the four winds or anything 🙄

5. I kind of love that Sansa’s the one who insists on taking back Winterfell and is all “help me or not I’m doing it”

6. I’m Brienne of Tarth and I HAVE A LONG FUCKING MEMORY. Wait... wrong show. (She DOES, though...) 

7. Wow Petyr lying about Sansa being forced to Marry Ramsay... he’s playing the lords of the Vale like a fiddle.

8. That’s a lovely bird he got Robin. What a pretty boy.

9. Missandei staring daggers at Tyrion is Excellent Content. The “Tyrion tries to be a little more diplomatic but this involves dealing with slavers” problem is... a bit oversimplified, but at least they’re addressing it? Still not great. 

10. Jorah and Daario are off on a secret mission and I cant stop hearing the Galavant song.

11. The older widow of the Dosh Khaleen is more interesting than the show will let her be.

12. Is that Lazareen widow Dutch from Killjoys? IT IS!!!!

13. Guess what high Sparrow NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR SELF RIGHTEOUS CONVERSION STORY LEAST OF ALL ME (guess who has some issues with organized religion it’s meeeee)

14. Way to act your heart out, though, Jonathan Pryce.

15. So idk if I’ve made a big deal about this but I’m SUPER QUEER and seeing Loras broken like that made my heart stop for a second.

16. “Not setting off” fanatics, huh Pycelle? I think Cersei has other ideas 😈 🔥

17. Tommen is TALLER THAN CERSEI NOW

18. Cersei and Jaime trying to get Olenna and Kevan on their side against the High Sparrow is... smarter than I thought it was going to be when they walked into that room. They had a united front, they were clearly working together... WHAT IS THIS I LIKE IT

19. Theon looks like a ghost of himself. :( And Pyke looks all creepy.

20. Jeez Yarra go easy on your little brother his psyche still has cracks in it. I guess it’s understandable that she’s pissed given the failed rescue and the timing of his arrival. I kept just waiting for him to say “I want to be home,” when she yelled WHAT DO YOU WANT but he didn’t and that makes me sad. (Home should have been Winterfell or wherever Sansa was just saying.)

21. Oh Osha don’t try it... shit. Well, you tried

22. And Tormund’s epic crush on Brienne begiiiiiins

23. SHIT RAMSAY TELLS JON HE HAS RICKON

24. Sansa insisting on reading the rest of the letter from Ramsay is... made of steel. I’m here for her being the driving force behind this attempted rescue.

25. I didn’t realize that so many Dothraki knew about how Dany lost the baby and Drogo.

26. DID DANY JUST KILL ALL OF THE KHALS? Girl knows how to make an entrance? The optics here are sooooo problematic but she looks DAMNED impressive the plan in and of itself is sound - gets rid of the men who don’t respect her and shows herself to be indestructible in one power move...

6x05 OH NO THIS IS CALLED THE DOOR I THINK I KNOW WHAT IS COMING

1. Is it just me or are d and d writing more and more episodes themselves?

2. Sansa has had enough of Littlefinger’s bullshit. Making him face up to what HE LEFT HER TO WHEN HE MARRIED HER TO RAMSAY AND ABANDONED HER YES GOOD.

3. When he says “did he cut you” and Sansa talking about Ramsay not caring as long as she could give him an heir... does that mean what I think it does? FGM? I hate that I even wonder. (Still not sure about this, but I don’t put it past them to imply something horrific like that and then not come back to it.)

4. The more I see the waif fight, the cooler she gets.

5. Faceless men founded Braavos? Right I KNEW that.

6. Ok the play is fun... complete with sound effects. So interesting to see what people in Braavos think of everything that happened.

7. So... I would Lady Crane’s voice anywhere. Hi Phryne!

8. Oh wow look at all the CotF

9. THEY MADE THE WHITE WALKERS I did not know that and for YEARS before this season came out we had an au idea where that was true and I AM SCREAMING

10. AND THEY DID IT TO DEFEND AGAINST THE ANDALS AND WHAT THEY WERE DOING TO THE TREES

11. Yara’s speech was lovely, Theon supporting her was sweet, but Yara shouldn’t have needed a dude’s support to get that reaction from the crowd. She’s been on Pyke and being badass ALL HER LIFE. That being said, I like to think Yara would have been Queen in this version of things if Euron hadn’t showed up. What a Dick.

12. How does Euron go from wanting to marry Dany to allying with Cersei? I guess I’m about to find out.

13. Damphair knows cpr, idiot showrunners. don’t just let Euron lie there.

14. YES GET AWAY YARA AND THEON AND... a lot of the fleet? Good on them.

15. Jorah trying to leave Dany and her not letting him and commanding him to find a cure aaaahhhhh my feelings 😢

16. In the real world Tyrion would have been a great campaign manager.

17. If they wanted someone local... why get a red priestess from Volantis? Is this supposed to be the same woman? Do any of the people of Meereen even follow the faith of R’Hollor?

18. Varys having no time for the red faith’s bullshit is SO GOOD. It’s ok Varys you’re probably the most famous eunuch in the world right now. And whoop de doo a sorceress knows a story about a sorcerer it’s a small magical world don’t let her cow you.

19. ...whatcha doing, Bran???

20. Well that’s not creepy at all. Soooo many wights. Were there only... four white walkers including the night king? I’m so confused.

21. “The Umbers gave Rickon to Ramsay they can hang” YES SANSA

22. Why did she lie about getting info from Petyr? (And GOOD ON BRIENNE calling her on it)

23. Brienne calling Jon “a bit brooding” is the most hilarious thing ever. Somewhere Jaime Lannister is laughing his ass off. 

24. Yes wolfy clothes for everyone.

25. Awww Edd forgetting he’s acting lord commander is hilarious.

26. SO MANY WIGHTS DON’T DIE MIRA

27. Why are the children and the white walkers on opposite sides? Are these just about rogue CotF? EXPLAIN SHOW EXPLAIN

28. Cool visuals though... the night king walking through that fire was AWESOME.

29. Rickard LOOKS like a stark in that flashback.

30. RIP Bloodraven... glad you didn’t have to see how pointless all of this was.

31. Wait wait plain old wights can KILL THE CHILDREN? Dumb.

32. SUMMER NO I AM NOT OK WITH ANY OF THIS not Leaf either she’s a nice little tree person even if her motivations are unclear.

33. So Bran warging into Hodor in the present and in the past at the same time is what messed him up? Or something about the time folding and Bran BEING THERE?

34. That was upsetting as fuck about Hodor and I AM SAD EVEN THOUGH I KNEW IT WAS COMING

And... tumblr won’t let me post the whole thing. I had A LOT to say about some later episodes. Remember when I was going to keep this to three bullet points for each episode? Yeah me neither. 

[alovesongshewrote]

Lyin’ in a Bush and Letting the Earth Reclaim You | Peter Parker

Plot:  ur sad lol  [Peter Parker x Gender Neutral!Reader]

Word Count:  803

Warnings:  nothing too bad here, uhhhhh, the reader says some depressing shit, they’re basically having an existential crisis, so watch out for that

A/N: so, this isn’t Douxie, and that’s because I looked at my masterlist and went, “Huh, this looks a little bit uneven.”  That’s mostly bc of aaty, but still, here’s a lil’ drabble to even things out.  Also, I wrote this like, months ago and edited it tonight, so expect a small bby dip in quality.

masterlist

Today was not a good day.

It just felt like everything had gone wrong in the world, and quite honestly, you wanted to curl up in a little ball and pretend you didn’t exist.

You had woken up late, forgotten to hand in an essay, spilled coffee on yourself, gotten yelled at by both a guy on the street and one of your teachers, the whole nine yards.  Everything was awful and the universe didn’t care about you.

You just wanted to melt away into nothing, but you couldn’t do that yet because the Avengers had a stupid meeting with the stupid government, and you had to be there for it.  Stupid.

Despite your desperate attempts to stay focused, you found yourself zoning out multiple times, each time snapping back to reality only to see an irritated Avenger glaring at you.  

Yep, today was not a good day.

Walking back home from the meeting, you let your mind wander.  It wasn’t like you could do anything about it.  Your eyes were already heavy and stinging from mild sleep deprivation, so you let your brain do as it pleased.

And what your brain pleased was to give you an existential crisis at nine p.m.

You wondered if you mattered at all to this world.  If you disappeared, who would miss you?  You knew deep down that your friends and family would, but at the moment, you didn’t care.  On a grand scale, the world didn’t need you to function.

You might as well just lie down somewhere and let the earth reclaim you.

And so that’s what you tried to do.

You walked over to the nearest park and lied down under a bush, trying and failing to avoid the scrape of branches against your skin.  Once you were comfortable, or as comfortable as one could be lying under a bush, you stayed there.  Just staring into the leaves.

You laid there for about twenty minutes when you heard branches rustling.  They weren’t branches that belonged to your bush, they came from somewhere nearby, so you sat up, searching for the offending branches.

This surprised a nearby Spiderman, who had just landed on the ground after swinging through the park and rustling some branches.

“AAAAH, WHAT THE HELL?!”

“Oh.  Sorry,”

“Wait, (Y/N)?” Peter pulled off his mask,  “What are you doing in a bush?  In a public park?  At night?”

“Letting the Earth reclaim me,”

“Oh,” he sat down next to you, “Can I ask why?”

“The universe is an uncaring mistress.  I don’t matter to this mortal plane.  Natasha glared at me today,”

“Whoa, wait, hold on, what do you mean you don’t matter?”

You laid back down in the bush, “I mean if I disappeared it would mean nothing in the grand scheme of things.  Life would go on-”

“No.  Not for me, it wouldn’t,”

You stopped your angsty rambling, bolting upwards, very confused.

“What?”

“I mean if you disappeared it would mean something to me.  Like... life wouldn’t go on.  I would spend every day looking for you or trying to bring you back, or something!  I don’t know, but things- they wouldn’t be normal.  And that’s not just for me, that’s for everyone.  Even Natasha.”

You smiled a little, for the first time today.  There was a second of silence before you asked, “Why?”

He turned to you and somehow found your hand in the darkness,  “Because you matter to us, to me, (Y/N).  It’s as simple as that,” he leaned towards you, “There’s nothing else to it.  We-I care about you, and I like having you around, and I-I-”

“Thanks, Peter,”  You stopped him, smiling.  You hadn’t realized how close you were.  It was nice, you decided, you liked being close to him.

“(Y/N)?”

“Yeah?”

“I care you,” That made you laugh, and once you started, you couldn’t stop.  It must’ve seemed so strange to anyone passing by.  Two teenagers, laughing away in the dark of the night.  Then again, this was New York.  Some people shit on the subway, it’s a very strange place.

Eventually, the giggles subsided enough for you to say, “I care you too, Peter.”

“Thank you,”

Right then and there, you decided that you would go through a hundred, no, a thousand more bad days if it meant you got to spend one second with this boy.

“So,”  Peter stood, his hand still in yours, “We should probably get you home,”

“Probably,”

“I can walk you if you want,”

You looked at Peter, and then down at your entwined hands.  Something on his wrist caught your attention.

“I have a better idea,”

It had been a bad day.  Everything seemed to go wrong, and it felt like the world was against you.  Fortunately, you had Peter at your side to make everything okay again.